#this will also signal the start of his coming out arc

[deadnatura11]

Eddie’s gonna end the season/start the next season blond ain't he 😭

[star-suh]

Straight as A Line

Park Jinyoung x Male Reader

cw: homophobic top jinyoung, rough sex, dubious consent, hickeys, college au, swearing at each other, cheating, feminization, porn with a little of plot, a redemption arc for jinyoung lol… 

an: lmfaoooo that redemption arc happened when my music suddenly changed to lana del rey's songs changing the whole mood, i'm so sorry if this isn't what you wanted anon 😭🙏

this was a request.

—

the university where y/n was studying was planning a trip to go camping in the mountains. it was a dream trip for y/n, he could be close to nature and breathe that pure fresh air but all that sounded too nice to be true. 

"i don't know if i want to go on the trip, fuckass jinyoung is going and i don't feel like arguing with that son of a bitch" y/n tells his friend. 

jinyoung is one of those rich guys who have a lot of ass-lickers behind them, they do whatever he asks just for the money, also the guy is a fucking homophobe, when he found out that y/n is gay he started to make his life miserable. throwing slurs and swearing almost everyday towards the guy…

every student had an assigned seat “are we in school or something?” mocked jinyoung, his smile slowly fading seeing that he has to sit besides y/n “what the fuck? who put this pillow muncher beside me?” he yelled, “can you just shut the fuck up? you're not that important dude no one cares where you sit stop being a manchild” responded y/n making jinyoung's blood boil in anger.

“listen here, cocksucker. i don't want people like you near me you disgust me” he spat while signaling towards y/n with one finger. “stop signaling me you weirdo. you know that usually men who make fun of someone who is gay do it to cover up their homosexuality .. like why are you mad about me sucking a dick that's not so straight from you, jinyoung..” a grimace of laughter finding its way onto y/n's face while jinyoung's was red for the anger, y/n swear he can see the steam coming out of his ears.

jinyoung quietly accepted he lost this time and sat beside y/n ‘this is not going to stay like this’ he thought, crafting his revenge towards the guy.

it was night already, all the tents are ready and everyone is going inside them, y/n was getting ready to sleep in his sleeping bag when suddenly the zipper of his tent opens “what the fu-” a big hand covering his mouth to prevent him from making any noises. “hello motherfucker” jinyoung smiled “you thought i forgot what you said on the bus dirty whore? i think someone should teach you manners and how to be a nice obedient bitch, what do you think?”.

managing to get away from the strong grip of jinyoung's hand on his mouth y/n says “what the fuck are you talking about you fucking psycho, get out of my fucking tent before i start to scream”.

jinyoung's big veiny hand found its way towards y/n neck squeezing it hard “do it and what i'm gonna do next it's gonna be worse, you hear me?” scared by how menacing the words came out of his mouth y/n just nodded, “what do you want then, a public apology?. fucking asshole”.

“you see.. i was talking with my girlfriend and i got so horny-”, “and? do i look like some type of… friend to you? i don't wanna know shit about it” interrupted y/n. “anyways as i said” jinyoung continued “i'm so bricked that my dick is poking his way out of my shorts, so i was looking for a way to calm it but the rest of the bitches are sleeping and apparently you're the only one bitch awake so… i thought why not use this opportunity to help you be my obedient slut. after all you like cocks” he slapped gently y/n's cheeks. “fuck you” are the only words coming out of y/n's mouth…

“shh be quiet” whispered jinyoung while forcing his cock down y/n's throat, the gagging sounds making him more horny “you're so talented at cocksucking, truly a whore. you do it better than my girlfriend” he snickered while thrusting his thick cock. 

“never thought i would see you this fucked up” jinyoung was stroking his cock while y/n was laying down panting, trying to catch his breath, with spit and cum covering his face “talking about dirty whores when you can't keep that thing inside your pants. coming here like a needy bitch looking for a hole to fuck”.

jinyoung just stared at y/n with a smirk on his face “i'm not done with you slut, look at this” he pokes his rock hard cock making it bounce a little “i'm gonna wreck your boypussy. come here” his hand snaking around y/n's shorts and discarding them quickly, along with the underwear. “leave me alone whore” y/n tried to push jinyoung with his feet but the bastard was so strong… and sexy.

jinyoung spat on his fingers and rub it on y/n's rim the cold fluid sending shivers up his spine “hngh.. stop it manwhore…” the pleasure clouding his thinking. jinyoung slap his fuckmeat on the rim and slowly introduce it, drawing a loud moan grom y/n due to the stretching “shush be quiet. you don't want someone to find us right? or is that what you want? woah what a pervert” y/n just ignored the comment and sucked on jinyoung's fingers.

“is that all you got, fragile masculinity slut?. not gonna be surprised if your girlfriend kicks you, you suck at fucki-” a slap landed on y/n's cheek. “stop being a loud motherfucker and let me fuck your pussy” his anger being canalized into fucking y/n “i don't give a fuck if you like it or not” he growls “i’m only here to use you like you let other men do”.

“fuck i love the sight of your gaping pussy. after being passed around the whole university is still so tight… even more than my girlfriend's”. “can you stop mentioning her you asshole?. she deserves a better man than you” y/n says, accommodating himself to ride jinyoung “let's get this over with, i want you gone”.

everytime he goes down y/n makes sure to do it hard causing jinyoung to moan very loudly, “look who's the loud bitch now. you call yourself a man and can't even handle me”. jinyoung laughed quickly grabbing y/n by his ankles pulling them towards him folding y/n in the process, his dick going in and out. y/n squirmed, his eyes rolled back and mouth agape, feeling that cock reaching so deep inside him, no other cock has made him feel like that.

“what happened pillow muncher.. too much to handle?” he starts sucking hickeys in the back of y/n's neck. “i'm gonna breed this pussy and after this you're gonna be mine you hear me?” he whispered while flipping y/n a fuck him while he leans on his back “no… i don't belong to.. to anyone not even to a loser like you” the older just ignored it and continued looking for his pleasure.

“guess you're not that straight macho after all” y/n murmured drawing jinyoung's attention, “just because i'm stretching your boypussy and about to cream it right now doesn't make me a homo… i'm straight as a line..”. y/n with his hooded eyes make eye contact with the top, smiled and caressed his cheek “even the straightest line can be curved dumbass” he then kisses his forehead “c'mon cream this fucking pussy… isn't this what you want hurry up before someone wakes up” fucking himself in jinyoung's dick y/n also searched for his pleasure his cock splurting with cum minutes later landing on jinyoung's chest and abs, while that happened he squeezed so hard that jinyoung came without realizing it, emptying his balls in the insatiable hole of y/n. 

jinyoung tried to catch his breath resting his head on y/n's chest falling asleep, followed by y/n minutes later.

the ride back to university was surprisingly quiet, jinyoung didn't say a word about sitting next to y/n, everyone was surprised. one by one they got off the bus with jinyoung and y/n being the last, the tall one grabbed the shorter one by the hand so that he wouldn't come down yet. "i'm going to break up with my girlfriend... what i’m doing with her is not right." "wow, at least there's some empathy inside that empty skull" y/n responded. jinyoung just laughed looking at y/n with a fond smile "sigh... i'm so sorry for what i’ve put you through all these years... i know that's not going to change the damage i've already done but i want to start being a good person… wanna go eat lunch? it's on me".

surprised by the sudden change y/n wondered what happened with him last night “are you okay? did you eat something strange this morning?”. “no fucking asshole i just… i just wanted to change my behaviour… you know if the straightest line can be curved that means that we can change and it's never too late to do it” y/n just stared at him dumbfounded “are you being serious right now? are you philosophizing over a silly phrase i just made up…ugh fucking corny anyways is free food and i can't say no to that so text me where is it and see you there. i guess..” y/n was about to get off but turned around, stood up and pet jinyoung's head, a slight blush covering his cheeks. jinyoung just stood there watching y/n get off the bus with a smile slowly forming in his face.

[crheativity]

Can we get a part three of This with riddle and Ruggie?? Thank you! 💜 it's fine if you can't do it btw!

SUMMARY: Someone's picked a fight with Prefect! But he isn't going to let anyone hurt you anymore. Not on his watch. Part 3! Part 1 w/ Cater and Azul can be found here, and part 2 w/ Vil and Silver can be found here.

WARNING: Riddle calls someone a coward. Also the words idiot and jerk are in his part. People get hurt in Ruggie’s part but it isn’t really gory or anything

COMMENTS: I’m so sorry this took so long, my hands have been in a lot of pain the past couple months and are only starting to get better 🥲 I hope you enjoy it! Ruggie and Riddle were super good ideas for this prompt, this was so much fun to write! Thank you for the request! Also, if anyone has any ideas for more characters they’d like for this series, feel free to send in a request!

It must be raining.

You were just out in a storm. That’s all.

That would explain the crack of thunder that collided with your face and gave you a throbbing headache. The warm liquid blurring your vision and dripping out of your mouth and nose was just the rain, not some unholy mix of blood and tears. The chills that froze you where you stood was just humidity and the cold, not adrenaline and raw fear.

And yet, even with your desperate brain trying to come up with some reasonable explanation, the only thunderstorm you could see in front of you was a student you couldn’t recognise. Not with your head pounding like this. Not with the thunder in your ears.

There was something about the boy that scared you. That wasn’t uncommon - this school was full of terrifyingly promising mages. But the scariest thing wasn’t how he wielded his magical pen with deadly accuracy, or how strong he so evidently was.

It was just how much he seemed to be enjoying the mix of horror and pain, of blood and tears, that must have been so evidently and delicately splashed across your face.

His smile twisted as he raised his pen again, something in those cruel eyes of his setting off alarm signals in your aching head.

“This’ll teach you not to meddle where you don’t belong.”

The pen glowed, pure magic surrounding it as he prepared to shoot. His sadistic eyes were alight with entertainment. He knew what he was about to do. He didn’t care.

You squeeze your eyes shut and braced for the lightning.

“OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!”

Your eyes snapped open just in time to see the lightning, arcing gracefully yet violently through the air.

Aiming straight for your assailant’s neck.

“What the- hey! Get this thing off of me!” The boy snapped, tugging at the heart shaped collar that had just appeared around his neck.

“I most certainly will not!”

Spinning around, you saw two boys making their way towards you. One was tall with short green hair, glasses, and a familiar symbol - a club - painted just below his left eye. He looked worried, his gaze flicking from you, to your assailant, to his companion and back again.

The second boy made your heart skip a beat.

His small frame shook with rage. His face, twisted with anger, had become as red as his hair. He marched straight past you, heading towards your assailant, his magical pen gripped tightly in his hand.

Uh oh.

The moment Riddle Rosehearts decides to get involved, heads roll.

“How dare you?!” He yelled. “Using magic in a fight is a clear violation of the rules! Did you think you could just shamelessly flaunt your rule-breaking and expect me not to see it?! And attacking the magic-less prefect of all people! If you really must break the rules, at least fight someone on an equal footing as you, coward!”

The courtyard was dead silent as Riddle verbally ripped into the student, chewing him out for several rule violations and other discourtesies.

“But the prefect started it-!” Your assailant protested.

“I don’t know what history you and the prefect may have, but in this instance you attacked without provocation and without warning!” Riddle huffed. “And don’t try to lie to me. I saw the whole thing.”

The boy visibly deflated. There was no getting out of this for him.

“I want to see your student ID. Now.” Riddle ordered.

The boy sighed, pulled his ID out of his bag and handed it to Riddle.

“Ah, Pomefiore, hm? Be thankful you’re not in Heartslabyul,” he snapped, handing the ID back to the student. “Although,” he added, “Vil Schoenheit is certainly not the most lenient of housewardens. He will deal with you appropriately.”

You felt a hand rest on your shoulder. Looking up, you realised Trey Clover had stopped next to you.

He gave you a small, strained smile. “Are you alright, Prefect?”

Riddle glanced back over at you, a little startled. It appeared he had forgotten you were here.

“I’m alright… I think.” You managed, sending both the dormleader and vice-dormleader a smile.

Riddle’s face somehow got even redder and he looked away. You would’ve thought it almost funny if the world hadn’t started spinning. You quickly grabbed Trey’s arm to steady yourself.

“Maybe not.” You added.

Trey reached over to support you. “Riddle, you know more first aid than I do. I’ll take him to Pomefiore and explain the situation to Vil, but maybe you should take care of the Prefect or something?”

“Very well.” Riddle made his way over to you, reaching out to support you. He gently led you over to a bench and pulled out a handkerchief.

“Please pardon me, I’m going to administer first aid to you now.” He spoke stiffly. You nodded dazedly, and then felt a pang of regret as your headache tripled in intensity. You focused on breathing steadily as he cleaned the blood from your face and examined your injuries.

“You’ll have a couple of bruises, but nothing serious, thankfully.” He sighed in relief and instructed you to apply pressure to your nose and angle your head downwards to stem the bleeding.

Slowly but surely, the bleeding stopped. Riddle sat with you quietly the entire time, silently supporting you. You got the impression that he didn’t quite know what to say or do, and just how close you both were wasn’t helping matters. That was alright, though. Just having him here was enough.

“Prefect…” Riddle spoke so quietly you weren’t even sure he’d spoken. He was looking away from you, his face a light pink colour. He seemed embarrassed.

“What’s up?”

Riddle took a deep breath, then slowly exhaled. “I… apologise for losing my temper back there. And also for not arriving and stopping him sooner. I’m truly sorry.”

You stared at him for a moment, then cracked a smile. “It’s alright. Although it would’ve been nice not to get hurt in the first place, it’s not your fault at all. You aren’t the idiot who tried to hurt me anyway.”

Riddle flinched at your ‘swear’. “Prefect!”

You grinned mischievously. “Wha-at? There’s no rule against calling someone an idiot, is there? Besides, you called him a coward earlier. If I’m going to get in trouble for calling someone an idiot then you should get in trouble for calling someone a coward.”

Riddle smiled and shook his head, his cheeks slightly pink. “Well then, I suppose I’ll have to watch my tongue. As Heartslabyul dorm leader, I simply must set a good example for my dorm members. Which means I must refrain from calling people… jerks.”

You gasped and clapped your hand over your mouth, trying so hard not to burst out laughing. “Riddle!”

His eyes lit up as you said his name. He looked at you so gently, so lovingly as you struggled not to laugh that you felt your face going warm.

Wouldn’t it be nice to stay like this forever….?

A yell of pain shot through the air, wrenching your eyes open in fear. Stumbling backwards, you drank in the scene in front of you before realising in horror what had happened.

Someone had jumped in front of you.

A beastman, to be more specific.

The boy stood protectively in front of you, breathing hard, hackles raised. He had dirty blond hair and an outfit much too big for him. His right hand was gripped tightly around his magical pen, his left was holding his right shoulder. Blood was beginning to fall at his feet.

Wait, blood?

Scanning him again quickly and you saw them: shards of ice crystals stuck out of his shoulder at every angle. Your stomach twisted and you felt the bile rise in the back of your throat.

“Prefect, go!”

“But-“

The boy turned at you and snarled. “Run!”

You stumbled backwards, stunned. A spell - another gift from your assailant - flew by your ear. Scrambling backwards, you cast your eyes around to find a place to hide.

There!

Sprinting over and sliding into the hiding spot, you peaked your head around and watched.

It was brutal.

The boy who saved you - the boy you now recognise as your crush, Ruggie Bucchi - fought viciously, yet his opponent was not the kind to give up easily. For every spell Ruggie had, this boy somehow managed to dodge or deflect almost every single one of them, and fire off a few of his own.

Come on, Ruggie. You thought. Please be okay.

Ripping your gaze from the fight, you pulled a packet of wipes from your bag and forced yourself to clean your wounds. Anything to distract from what was going on.

After all, there was no way you could help. You were magicless after all, so it was probably best to just leave things to those who could fight, right?

…Right?

A yell of pain forced your attention back on the fight. Both boys were now breathing hard, blood strewn across the courtyard. From the looks of things, neither boy could beat the other. Ruggie couldn’t break a hole in his defence and the other boy could barely hit Ruggie, who was sprinting and dodging like his life depended on it.

“Stay still, mutt!” The boy snapped, firing off spell after spell.

Ruggie didn’t even respond. His concentration remained on dodging and finding a weak point, but your assailant didn’t leave him time to cast a spell.

He just needed an opening.

Steeling yourself, you grabbed a rock and snuck around the two of them. You adjusted your grip on the rock.

Please, don’t let this hit anyone. You prayed, then stepped out into the open.

“HEY DIPSTICK, OVER HERE!” You yelled as loud as you could and then hurled the rock in his direction.

The boy whirled around and deflected the rock with magic in an instant. Seeing you, he seized his chance and prepared to fire off another spell. You squeezed your eyes tight and held your hands in front of your face.

“Laugh with me!”

No spell came. Opening your eyes, you saw the boy in front of you, clearly angry. He walked towards you rigidly, as if he was trying to do anything but that. He pulled his student ID out of his bag and handed it to you.

Then he turned around and walked away. Your eyes followed him as he walked a ways off, then stopped.

The boy whirled around, his magical pen aimed directly at you and began to cast-

And then was immediately knocked off his feet from a blast of wind magic.

Someone grabbed your arm. “C’mon Prefect, now’s when we run-“

Ruggie ran hard, tugging you along with him as you dodged through crowds of people, eventually slowing to a stop in front of some empty classrooms.

You gasped for breath and put your hands on your knees, trying to recover from your sprint. Glancing up, you saw Ruggie leaning against the wall, breathing hard.

He looked awful.

His shoulder looked worse, his uniform was singed and he smelled of smoke. He had countless scratches and scrapes. Yet despite all this, he caught your eye and smiled painfully.

“What… whatcha starin’ at, Prefect?” He panted, clearly exhausted.

“Your shoulder…” you managed. His smile fell and he shrugged - then grimaced.

“‘S fine. Don’t need to worry, shishish-“ he cursed and winced.

You walked over to him and looked him over. His face was ever so slightly pink as he looked away. He shook slightly as you tugged off his jacket and rolled up his sleeves.

Pulling out your packet of wipes, you looked up at him. “This okay?”

He glanced at you briefly, his face still pink, his ears flat against his head. He looked away again. “‘S whatever.” He mumbled.

You gently cleaned up his cuts and scrapes. Looking at his shoulder injury, you sighed. “I can’t do anything about that one. I’m taking you to the nurse’s office.”

“But-“ he protested, but fell silent when you cut him off.

“No buts. That’s serious, Ruggie. I’ll buy you doughnuts if you let me take you.” You added, hoping the bribe would work.

He hesitated, then smiled at you. “Fine. Shishishi, if I didn’t know better, I’d guess you’d care for me or somethin’.”

You simply stared at him.

He went red. “P-prefect-? Got somethin’ you wanna say? Haha…”

“Come on,” you said with a smile and a sigh. “Let’s get you to the infirmary.”

“Okay.”

What a dummy. You thought as you pulled him along. I think I love him.

♥Thank you for reading!! I hope you enjoyed it!!♥

[whinlatter]

sirius and ginny: a meta (part 1)

“Excuse me, but I care what happens to Sirius as much as you do!” said Ginny, her jaw set so that her resemblance to Fred and George was suddenly striking.’

are you a very brave, very reckless, very hot self-destructive rebel with a treacherous sibling and a flair for christmas decoration, harbouring complex feelings about your mother, close ties to crookshanks the cat and spend your days plagued by the memory of your worst mistakes and dark past? do you find yourself constantly being begged to stay in a state of protective confinement to save your life by a young man with a lightning scar, bad hair and crippling abandonment issues? if so, congratulations! you might be one of harry potter's chosen family members, sirius black and ginevra molly weasley! 

basically - i want to talk about sirius and ginny. these are two characters who don’t share a lot of scenes in canon but who, i think, have some clear (if overlooked) parallels: stubborn, fiercely protective of harry, self-sacrificing, admired, principled, haunted (in different ways) by traumatic pasts and betrayals, with complicated relationships with their families and entirely uncomplicated devoted relationships with someone else’s cat. their narrative arcs are successive, with ginny ascending in significance in the series during sirius’ period of decline and ultimate death. and ultimately, they’re also the two people who become, over the course of the canon series, family to a protagonist desperately seeking to build one. sirius and ginny are the two people harry in canon most worries about, wants to protect, and thinks of as someone who embodies the promise of family and home.

sirius and ginny aren’t mirror images of each other. ofc, ginny also has parallels with the only other family members harry claims in the series, lily and james (i mean, especially james - she’s literally a cocky funny flirtatious chaser with a years-long debilitating mega crush who can also catch a snitch like a champ. come on now). it’s also clear in canon that sirius means more to ginny as a hero/role model/ally against her mother than ginny ever means to sirius. nevertheless, the text puts in work to let the reader know we should think about these characters together as somehow aligned. from the beginning of ootp, there are clues and signals in the text that foreshadow ginny’s emergence as someone important to harry, and that subtly let the reader know that the baton of being harry’s ‘person’ is about to be passed from sirius to ginny, two kindred spirits, after sirius’ death. so that's what this meta is about! (consider this my 700th attempt to show that, as the popular fandom complaint/all of reddit still insist, ginny as a character, and especially the harry/ginny romance, did not ‘come out of nowhere’.)

the following meta is part one of two (and yet it's still too long! sorry about it). o in this part, i look at the period from the end of goblet of fire thru the start of half blood prince, exploring how the text sets up the sirius and ginny parallels as a way of foreshadowing ginny’s emergence as harry’s main love interest and place as a family substitute. the second part (tbc) will be what the memory of sirius does for harry’s view of his relationship with ginny, and the kind of positive - and negative - ways this shapes harry’s ideas about love and what family do for each other. i wrote this meta as a way of thinking through some characterisation choices for my current WIP, beasts. if you're following along with that fic, this meta can be seen as a companion piece especially to my thinking behind chapters ten and eleven, so hope proves helpful for some of my thinking behind the sirius and ginny friendship that appears in that project. it's also dedicated to @ashesandhackles, queen of metas, who has reminded me to post this meta precisely 9 million times because she is a long-suffering saint.

ok - sirius and ginny. let’s goooooo!

sirius and ginny before ootp

before OotP, ginny is absent from any plot connected to sirius. ginny doesn’t know the truth about sirius’ innocence, nor does she know that harry, her brother and her friend are in regular contact with sirius and that harry now as a surrogate father/big brother figure to confide in and seek comfort in.  in fact, in one of ginny’s few appearances in GoF, the narration is unusually insistent that the reader knows how little ginny knows about sirius:

“And have you heard from — ?” Ron began, but at a look from Hermione he fell silent. Harry knew Ron had been about to ask about Sirius. Ron and Hermione had been so deeply involved in helping Sirius escape from the Ministry of Magic that they were almost as concerned about Harry’s godfather as he was. However, discussing him in front of Ginny was a bad idea. Nobody but themselves and Professor Dumbledore knew about how Sirius had escaped, or believed in his innocence. “I think they’ve stopped arguing,” said Hermione, to cover the awkward moment, because Ginny was looking curiously from Ron to Harry. “Shall we go down and help your mum with dinner?” 

the only other tiny crumb of sirius and ginny we get is the news that the owl sirius bought in PoA and gifted to ron as a replacement pet for scabbers has been embraced and named by ginny. sirius gifting a tiny little spitfire of an owl that annoys ron? it's giving foreshadowing, your honour.

the reader, though, knows who sirius is to harry by GoF. throughout this book, for the first time in the series, harry has a person he can claim as something like a family: someone to worry about, someone who cares about him,who can advise, guide and mentor him, as well as offer him support and consolation in difficult times (‘someone like a parent…’) although sirius has not been able to offer harry a stable alternative home to the dursleys due to his status as a wanted man, he’s still filling a role that previously had been vacant in the series: he’s harry’s person, the surrogate parent chosen for him by james and lily. he’s close by, either by the floo or eventually living (at great personal cost) as padfoot in hogsmeade, and he’s present emotionally for harry in ways that prove incredibly meaningful to his young godson. in times of great of distress, sirius is there for harry to meet emotional needs that ron and hermione (understandably, no shade to them) can’t always meet. the floo scene early on in GoF, during harry’s row with ron, is a particularly good example of this:

“Never mind me, how are you?” said Sirius seriously. “I’m —”  For a second, Harry tried to say “fine” — but he couldn’t do it. …Before he could stop himself, he was talking more than he’d talked in days — about how no one believed he hadn’t entered the tournament of his own free will, how Rita Skeeter had lied about him in the Daily Prophet, how he couldn’t walk down a corridor without being sneered at — and about Ron, Ron not believing him, Ron’s jealousy . . . Sirius looked at him, eyes full of concern… He had let Harry talk himself into silence without interruption’.

harry derives enormous comfort from sirius’ presence in his life during GoF. he writes to sirius, he repeatedly turns to him for advice, he worries for him more than he does any other person. sirius fulfils harry’s desire to be kept abreast of important information about voldemort and death eaters, doesn’t sugarcoat news for harry, and makes him feel important, cared for and understood. (harry even shows off to sirius telling him about how much of a slay the first task was. ugh). by the time of the third task, sirius is sending harry daily owls, a constant flow of reassurance and concern (‘He reminded Harry in every letter that whatever might be going on outside the walls of Hogwarts was not Harry’s responsibility, nor was it within his power to influence it. If Voldemort is really getting stronger again, he wrote, my priority is to ensure your safety.’) when harry returns from the graveyard at the novel’s end, it’s sirius who races to his side to advocate for him and offer him both words of comfort and physical affection as he processes the traumatic series of events that constitute the climax of the book’s plot. (my personal favourite part is where harry says ‘wormtail cut me with a knife’ and the text says sirius made a ‘vehement exclamation’, which i can only assume is children’s book speak for ‘fucking hell’.) harry goes to bed: sirius stays with him, a literal guard dog as he recuperates. after the most traumatic events of the series to date, the reader is at least consoled that harry potter has a person now, someone he loves for him to worry about and to worry for him, who catches him on the other side of traumatic events and makes them that bit much more bearable.

sirius and ginny during ootp

with sirius' role in harry's life established in GoF, OotP begins with harry, cooped up and restless at privet drive, angry with ron, hermione, sirius, and dumbledore for abandoning him at privet drive and keeping him in the dark. harry arrives at grimmauld place to find an anxious ron and hermione, with whom harry is angry and frustrated for having left him out of their summer hangs and having neglected him, by his assessment, in surrey. it’s the most conflict we’ve seen in the trio in terms of harry vs ron and hermione, and sets up one of the important themes of the book, which is harry no longer being solely emotionally fulfilled by the people he is closest to, including his two surrogate parents best mates but also his godfather. when he encounters sirius for the first time after the order meeting, he finds him surly, bitter, and depressed, furious that he is confined to his childhood home, and (understandably) much less able or willing to offer harry much in the way of comfort, apology or cheering words (‘Harry, who had expected a better welcome, noted how hard and bitter Sirius’s voice sounded.’) in this sense, the book opens with harry disappointed and/or more distant from all the people on whom he most depends and is usually closest to, and that there therefore is already an absence of a certain kind of emotional support in harry’s life that the plot demands be filled.

fresh off the back of harry’s row with ron and hermione is ginny’s reintroduction to the reader. after years of being so shy in harry’s presence she was often nearly mute, the reader finds that ginny is not only now speaking, but that her presence turns out to be remarkably refreshing. from her opening scene where ginny enters harry’s bedroom at grimmauld place, the reader discovers the new ginny is confident, up to no good, in cahoots with her most troublemaking brothers trying to intercept the order meeting, enterprising in her mischief (and very happy to lie to her mother’s face about it). she’s thoroughly unfazed by harry’s great display of rage that has just startled and upset ron and hermione. (side note: in both ootp and hbp, ginny’s opening scene is her entering harry’s bedroom, which is the kind of foreshadowing i personally find delicious). everyone else is behaving pretty much as they have been up to this point, but it’s ginny who is showcasing behaviours new to the reader, a signal that she might be about to play a different role in the series than she has done up to this point.

cut to the dinner scene. sirius and ginny are in the room together for the first time. sirius is moody: though he’s still able to laugh, enjoying displays of mischief and humour (the twins and the knife), he’s more bitter than harry and the reader have seen him since PoA. it’s an important scene for lots of reasons (not least the sirius v molly beef), but it’s also one where sirius and ginny are repeatedly drawn into mental association in the reader’s mind. it’s also a great scene because the behaviour of crookshanks the cat literally serves to foreshadow the behaviour of harry james potter in ways that are frankly extremely fun.

so! the sirius and ginny hints start small. from the start of the scene, ginny is amused by mundungus the crook (a man, we will learn, so disdained by her mother):

“Some’n say m’ name?” Mundungus mumbled sleepily. “I ’gree with Sirius. . . .” He raised a very grubby hand in the air as though voting, his droopy, bloodshot eyes unfocused. Ginny giggled. “The meeting’s over, Dung,” said Sirius, as they all sat down around him at the table. “Harry’s arrived.” 

sirius and harry, sat at the end of the table, are both greeted by crookshanks, sirius’ old accomplice from PoA:

'​​Harry felt something brush against his knees and started, but it was only Crookshanks, Hermione’s bandy-legged ginger cat, who wound himself once around Harry’s legs, purring, then jumped onto Sirius’s lap and curled up. Sirius scratched him absentmindedly behind the ears as he turned, still grim-faced, to Harry…

when fred and george’s levitation goes awry, flinging a knife at sirius (now that’s how you foreshadow a death), crookshanks bolts: 

‘Harry and Sirius were both laughing… Crookshanks had given an angry hiss and shot off under the dresser, from whence his large yellow eyes glowed in the darkness…’

during the meal, ginny’s with hermione, having a laugh with tonks, a character harry has just met but whom he has already decided to both admire and like. after the meal, when harry’s cheered up a bit and had his crumble (the man loves dessert), crookshanks finally emerges from his hiding place, having been coaxed out from his sulk by - you guessed it - one g. m. weasley:

‘…Ginny, who had lured Crookshanks out from under the dresser, was sitting cross-legged on the floor, rolling butterbeer corks for him to chase.’

a grouchy character, initially drawn to sirius, but prone to lashing out and locking himself away, only to be lured back out into comfort and safety by ginny weasley? wow………. radical

after dinner, the argument between sirius and molly kicks off. sirius is arguing hard for harry’s right to know, though he makes no attempt to advocate for any of the other weasleys or for hermione. ginny’s noticeably singled out in her reaction to this scene, the text highlighting that she is particularly struck by this conflict as if it is of particular personal resonance, including someone standing up to her famously overprotective mother for once:

‘Ron, Hermione, Fred, and George’s heads turned from Sirius to Mrs. Weasley as though following a tennis rally. Ginny was kneeling amid a pile of abandoned butterbeer corks, watching the conversation with her mouth slightly open. Lupin’s eyes were fixed on Sirius.’

of course, molly loses the argument: harry gets to stay for juicy order deets (‘Sirius was right, he was not a child.’) after the row, ginny is the only person forbidden from hearing information about the order’s activities. suddenly, the roles are switched: it’s ginny who’s now furious and bitter to be kept out of the action:

‘“Fine!” shouted Mrs. Weasley. “Fine! Ginny — BED!”  Ginny did not go quietly. They could hear her raging and storming at her mother all the way up the stairs, and when she reached the hall Mrs. Black’s earsplitting shrieks were added to the din. Lupin hurried off to the portrait to restore calm. It was only after he had returned, closing the kitchen door behind him and taking his seat at the table again, that Sirius spoke. “Okay, Harry . . . what do you want to know?”’ 

it’s not just the parallels of confinement between harry, sirius and ginny that are so revealing, it’s also the dual maternal conflicts. ginny loud raging at her own mother sets off the howling relic of sirius’, serving to underline two characters who continue to grapple with maternal relationships that are complex and full of conflict, though by no means solely negative (sirius i see you sleeping in your mother’s bedroom babe. don’t think i think your relationship with walburga is just one of straight hate ok). when ginny later gets knocked down the stairs by fred and george, there’s more direct mrs weasley/walburga parallels, with the two of them literally shouting over each other during the ordeal lol. as such, the readers see that the conflicts being set up for sirius’ character in this book - frustration at confinement, conflict with a mother figure, drawn to more reckless and arguably irresponsible characters (mundungus, the twins) and courses of action - are also conflicts subtly playing out with the new ginny we’re meeting, too.

as the rest of the summer at grimmauld wears on, there are more examples of sirius and ginny foreshadowing. the scenes where the two characters interact serve to place ginny and sirius firmly in the same camp of people harry admires and has fun with, the troublemakers and the rebels. over the prefects issue, ginny not only is sat chatting with the troublemaking adults harry likes most, but actively draws sirius into conversation on the issue, likely knowing the answer will comfort harry, but also showing a curiosity and interest in sirius that suggests she admires him:

“I was never a prefect myself,” said Tonks brightly from behind Harry as everybody moved toward the table to help themselves to food. Her hair was tomato-red and waist length today; she looked like Ginny’s older sister. “My Head of House said I lacked certain necessary qualities.”  “Like what?” said Ginny, who was choosing a baked potato. “Like the ability to behave myself,” said Tonks. Ginny laughed; Hermione looked as though she did not know whether to smile or not and compromised by taking an extra large gulp of butterbeer and choking on it.  “What about you, Sirius?” Ginny asked, thumping Hermione on the back. Sirius, who was right beside Harry, let out his usual barklike laugh…’

ginny’s choice to try and draw sirius into the conversation bears fruit: sirius confirms james was never a prefect, and harry’s sour mood is suddenly lifted. (‘All at once the party seemed much more enjoyable; he loaded up his plate, feeling unusually fond of everyone in the room.’) ginny is thus beginning to provide harry with subtle comfort and reassurance, especially as sirius, struggling with his own confinement,  is taking a less active role in trying to cheer harry up. what i also like is that we have evidence of how ginny views sirius - she’s curious about him and his past, she clearly thinks he and the other new rebellious adults are cool as shit, and she’s drawn increasingly away from her mother’s cautious overprotective approach towards these resistance fighters who prioritise the fight over safety. (it is noticeable to me that ginny does not become a prefect in HBP, suggesting sirius' example proved instructive).

we see more small parallels between sirius and ginny during the cleaning scenes. the battle against grimmauld place is an important symbol of one of the important themes of OotP as a book: a battle over past traumas and their persistent and unwieldy symptoms that are seemingly never-ending. while it’s harry’s experiences that, of course, take centre stage, sirius’, too, loom omnipresent throughout the text. it’s significant, then, that ginny’s own past gets brought up for the first time in three books here, albeit briefly: 

'They found an unpleasant-looking silver instrument, something like a many-legged pair of tweezers, which scuttled up Harry’s arm like a spider when he picked it up, and attempted to puncture his skin; Sirius seized it and smashed it with a heavy book entitled Nature’s Nobility: A Wizarding Genealogy. There was a musical box that emitted a faintly sinister, tinkling tune when wound, and they all found themselves becoming curiously weak and sleepy until Ginny had the sense to slam the lid shut…'

in this moment, we see sirius and ginny singled in the larger group as quick-thinking, shrewd characters, with a good instincts and common sense (if a bit of a tendency to get scrappy). their respective dark pasts are subtly alluded to. sirius whacks a spider trying to attack harry with a book that might as well be entitled my big book of family trauma. ginny, meanwhile, steps in when everybody present starts to be enchanted by a mysterious object luring them into danger by whacking it shut (gee i wonder why!) given this is the book that will see ginny mention the events of CoS for the first time in errrrr three years, it’s significant that the text is careful to draw ginny into this broader theme that unites sirius and harry, the constant reminders of traumatic pasts at every turn. we also see here the revelation that regulus black was a death eater. coming after news of percy weasley’s betrayal, sirius’ bitter dismissal of his younger brother deliberately mirrors ginny and the other weasleys’ attitude towards percy, this sense of pureblood families split over wizarding politics, often fatally. 

while harry fears his expulsion from hogwarts prior his hearing, he continues to fantasise about coming to live with sirius at grimmauld, and about being with a family member and finding an alternative home to hogwarts. sirius, as hermione astutely observes, tries to manage harry’s expectations and not to get his own hopes up: still, when harry is exonerated, sirius is visibly depressed, showing the beginnings of an emotional dependency on harry that harry feels great guilt over.when leaving grimmauld for the start of the school year, sirius, as padfoot, accompanies harry to king’s cross: unlike in GoF, though, he is spotted, and harry begins to worry much more actively about sirius’ vulnerability to capture, about his recklessness and about his judgement. concerned for sirius, and absent ron and hermione, who are in the prefects carriage, the person who stays with harry and offers him company is ginny. she sacrifices her own train journey (presumably with her own boyfriend) to find a carriage with harry and make sure he’s not lonely, bringing him to neville and luna and sorting him out after his embarassing cho run-in. it’s not a coincidence that once again we see ginny here taking care of harry crookshanks:

'“Where’s Crookshanks?” “Ginny’s got him,” said Harry. “There she is. . . .”  Ginny had just emerged from the crowd, clutching a squirming Crookshanks. “Thanks,” said Hermione, relieving Ginny of the cat. “Come on, let’s get a carriage together before they all fill up. . . '

once harry’s back at school, having left sirius behind to languish miserably in london, we see he's more isolated and alone than ever. he’s tormented by umbridge, endlessly (though often unfairly) frustrated with ron and hermione, ghosted by dumbledore, yet absent the more stable, reassuring sirius he came to know in GoF, unable to write candidly to him and faced with a much less well sirius in the opportunities they do have to speak face-to-face. as sirius’ mental health declines as he is shut up at grimmauld, his ability to support harry and comfort him starts to falter, and he becomes a much more uneven source of advice and support, particularly during his car crash floo appearance, where he’s much ruder than he has previously been (cutting off, ignoring their pleas for him to be more cautious, the infamous ‘the risk would have made it fun for james’ moment). this new sirius, clearly struggling, is much more happy to do up guilt trip to his godson than we have seen him to up this point (‘I’ll write to tell you a time I can make it back into the fire, then, shall I? If you can stand to risk it?’ - you petty little shit, padfoot). all of this serves to increase harry’s anxiety about sirius’ wellbeing and reinforce harry’s sense of emotional isolation. even sirius’ encouragement on the DA is, as hermione points out, partly bound up in more selfish motivations (‘I think he’s really frustrated at how little he can do where he is… so I think he’s keen to kind of… egg us on.’)

ginny’s largely absent in this section of the novel. in the brief moments she does appear, it’s to inject humour (eg. her impressions at the DA meeting) and in little reminders that she now has a boyfriend, no longer harbours romantic feelings for harry, making sure the reader continues to hold her mentally apart from harry. harry, meanwhile, misguidedly tries to seek out a relationship with cho chang, who is showing clear signs of her own emotional distress and inability to meet harry’s emotional needs given her own grief. still, among this, there’s still room for some small subtle sirius/ginny parallels. once the DA plot picks up, we have another little sign that ginny weasley and sirius black think somewhat alike:

“Yeah, the D.A.’s good,” said Ginny. “Only let’s make it stand for Dumbledore’s Army because that’s the Ministry’s worst fear, isn’t it?” 

“Trained in combat?” repeated Harry incredulously. “What does he think we’re doing here, forming some sort of wizard army? “That’s exactly what he thinks you’re doing,” said Sirius, “or rather, that’s exactly what he’s afraid Dumbledore’s doing — forming his own private army, with which he will be able to take on the Ministry of Magic.” 

with harry's isolation and need for more emotional support established in this first term, christmas at grimmauld offers more opportunity to subtly develop the sirius and ginny parallels, as well as to highlight ginny’s ability to fill the gaps left by sirius’ decline. after the attack on arthur weasley, the group arrive back at grimmauld:

‘Sirius was hurrying toward them all, looking anxious. He was unshaven and still in his day clothes; there was also a slightly Mundungus-like whiff of stale drink about him. “What’s going on?” he said, stretching out a hand to help Ginny up. “Phineas Nigellus said Arthur’s been badly injured —” 

could this be sirius literally lifting ginny up into plot significance? why yes it could

ofc the weasleys then argue with sirius about their right to go see their father. despite his own frustrations at being trapped at grimmauld, sirius proves the voice of reason and rational decision making against both ginny and the twins’ hotheadedness (ginny asks to borrow cloaks to go to the hospital: sirius: ‘Hang on, you can’t go tearing off to St. Mungo’s!’) crucially, though, when sirius points out that there are bigger things at stake - the work of the order and the resistance movement - it’s ginny who listens:

“Your father knew what he was getting into, and he won’t thank you for messing things up for the Order!” said Sirius angrily in his turn. “This is how it is — this is why you’re not in the Order — you don’t understand — there are things worth dying for!”  “Easy for you to say, stuck here!” bellowed Fred. “I don’t see you risking your neck!”  The little colour remaining in Sirius’s face drained from it. He looked for a moment as though he would quite like to hit Fred, but when he spoke, it was in a voice of determined calm. “I know it’s hard, but we’ve all got to act as though we don’t know anything yet. We’ve got to stay put, at least until we hear from your mother, all right?”  Fred and George still looked mutinous. Ginny, however, took a few steps over to the nearest chair and sank into it. Harry looked at Ron, who made a funny movement somewhere between a nod and shrug, and they sat down too. The twins glared at Sirius for another minute, then took seats on either side of Ginny.  “That’s right,” said Sirius encouragingly, “come on, let’s all . . . let’s all have a drink while we’re waiting…’

there’s a lot going on here: ginny’s willingness to follow sirius’ orders, but also her willingness to accept an argument based on some idea of the greater good before any of her brothers. she and sirius are aligned here, and it’s her decision to accept sirius’ reasoning that proves the catalyst for her brothers to follow. we see here how ginny has come to see sirius: someone she looks up to and admires, an adult whose judgement she trusts and whose worldview she subscribes to. (as a character prone to hero worship - see her view of her big brother bill - i think this is noteworthy, and is behind a lot of my characterisation choices for ginny towards sirius in beasts). but we also see that ginny agrees with sirius' worldview. there are some things worth dying for, and self-sacrifice is part of that.

when harry goes to sirius for reassurance about witnessing arthur’s attack, he finds sirius unable to properly console him and convince him that he was not to blame for arthur’s attack. the reader gets the impression of sirius withholding information from harry (‘He could only see a sliver of Sirius’s face; the rest was in darkness’), and the scene ends with sirius clapping harry on the shoulder and leaving him ‘standing alone in the dark’. while sirius throws himself into christmas preparations, obviously delighted to have company, harry shrinks from the cheer and isolates himself. in the end, ofc, the only person that manages to pull harry out of his dark, brooding thoughts is ginny. the text is careful to note she’s sitting beside him on the tube back from st mungo’s, when he looks very unwell. then, in the ‘lucky you’ scene, she showcases some of the same skills harry first came to appreciate in sirius in GoF. she tells it to him straight: she’s sympathetic, but not overly gushing, and she reminds him of her own intensely frightening experience which she endured alone, something harry can relate to, even if the experience of possession is not.  it’s an important scene for lots of reasons, but it’s also, crucially, the intervention that causes harry’s mood to lift, and he gets to enjoy a christmas with his godfather, the thing he had most wanted in the run-up to christmas, and which becomes the only holiday period harry and sirius ever spend together: 

‘I’m not the weapon after all, thought Harry. His heart swelled with happiness and relief, and he felt like joining in as they heard Sirius tramping past their door toward Buckbeak’s room, singing “God Rest Ye Merry, Hippogriffs” at the top of his voice.’

of course, once christmas is over, sirius slips back into a depressed, gloomy state. harry wants a better goodbye than he gives him, merely giving him a quick one armed hug (there’s a real theme throughout harry and sirius’ relationship of very sparing physical contact on sirius’ part, which is obviously a hole in harry's life ginny will fill in - er - a big way). back at school, harry returns to umbridge’s increasingly draconian rule, maks a disastrous attempt at forging a relationship with cho, and continues to feel lonely, paranoid, and angry. unable to speak to sirius properly via letter or floo - and unwilling to open the present sirius has given him to communicate directly with him, the two-way mirror - harry is increasingly sullen, a mood that only worsens after seeing snape's worst memory.

the easter egg scene is obviously important for hinny for lots of different reasons. but here i just want to highlight how the scene serves to show ginny as both the conduit to sirius for harry, and someone whose behaviour echoes that of sirius in GoF when harry first began to open up to and seek comfort in him. harry is distressed by his now complicated feelings both towards the father he previously revered and towards sirius, who seemed to encourage james’ bullying behaviour. ginny hands harry a chocolate easter egg covered in snitches: chocolate, a canonical source of comfort against dark thoughts, and an egg that reminds him of the love of parent. the act makes him suddenly emotional, though he at first denies he’s upset. ginny presses carefully and sensitively, asking the right questions to get him to confess the source of his worry, waiting for harry to take his time to speak - all behaviours that echo sirius’ own effective listening techniques. ginny’s acquaintance with sirius, and knowledge of how significant he is to harry, is important here, too, and a subtle sign to the reader that he trusts ginny with knowledge about sirius after a long time of having her in the dark about his godfather.  the reader leaves the scene having seen ginny breakthrough to harry emotionally in a way for the second time in the novel, in a way no other character has done (‘he felt a bit more hopeful…’) 

of course, the course of action ginny has set in motion is itself risky and reckless (‘anything is possible if you’ve got enough nerve’ is very marauders as a philosophy). the decision to go ahead with the plan the twins come up with is one harry sees as a decision on whether to be more like james and sirius - a risk taker - or to abandon the hero worship for the marauders he has lived with for so long. in the end, of course, it’s a win for the reckless troublemakers: he chooses to go ahead with the plan the twins have crafted and that ginny has set in motion, and to speak to sirius.

and yet. sirius is still alive - there is not need for ginny yet. for the remainder of the book, ginny has to beg to be included in the trio's plans and to be allowed to be a part of the plot to rescue sirius. she’s is often in conflict with harry, showing a lot of sirius’ bitterness at attempts at containment and to keep her out of the fighting. she grates against harry’s insistence that she is too young and inexperienced, and having to remind the trio that she, too, has come to care about sirius and wants to see him safe: 

“I’ve got a broom!” said Ginny.  “Yeah, but you’re not coming,” said Ron angrily.  “Excuse me, but I care what happens to Sirius as much as you do!” said Ginny, her jaw set so that her resemblance to Fred and George was suddenly striking. 

of course, it all ends in tragedy: sirius, desperate to go to harry’s aid and absolutely gunning for a fight after months of confinement, is killed, leaving harry alone. there a subtle clues that something has shifted in ginny’s relationship to harry and the trio in the scenes after sirius’ death, including ginny positioned as the mirror image to harry in the hospital: 

‘Harry was sitting on the end of Ron’s bed and they were both listening to Hermione read the front page of the Sunday Prophet. Ginny, whose ankle had     been mended in a trice by Madam Pomfrey, was curled up at the foot of Hermione’s bed…’

despite this, in the immediate aftermath of sirius’ death, harry is extremely alone. he is unable to work out what he needs (‘Whenever he was in company he wanted to get away, and whenever he was alone he wanted company.’) he tries to go to hagrid’s, but regrets it (‘He was starting to wish he was alone again’), leaving after hagrid reminds him of sirius’ core traits, an inability to stay out of the fight when he believes in the cause:

“But still, Harry . . . he was never one ter sit around at home an’ let other people do the fightin’. He couldn’ have lived with himself if he hadn’ gone ter help —” 

unlike at the end of GoF, harry is isolated by his grief and the revelation of the prophecy's contents by the end of this book. he goes alone to a secluded corner of the lakeshore, ‘sheltered from the gaze of passersby behind a tangle of shrubs’, and ‘[stares] out over the gleaming water’, and cries alone. there is no sirius or other person to catch him and console him in his grief. his person has died, and there’s a gap in his life again, just waiting to be filled: 

‘Wanting to impress Cho seemed to belong to a past that was no longer quite connected with him. So much of what he had wanted before Sirius’s death felt that way these days. . . . The week that had elapsed since he had last seen Sirius seemed to have lasted much, much longer: It stretched across two universes, the one with Sirius in it, and the one without.’

ginny and sirius parallels in HBP and DH

after sirius’ death, the parallels between sirius and ginny become more important as ginny moves into the centre frame as a character. at the start of HBP, harry arrives at the burrow and discusses his grief over sirius’ death with dumbledore in the burrow broom shed, acknowledging how profoundly the loss of a family member who cares singularly about him is affecting him. ('He felt stupid for admitting it, but the fact that he had had someone outside Hogwarts who cared what happened to him, almost like a parent, had been one of the best things about discovering his godfather . . . and now the post owls would never bring him that comfort again. . . .' beasts readers: there's a reason harry clings to letters!) of course, having reminded the reader of the gap in harry’s life that now needs to be filled, harry goes to sleep, the active reflection on his grief for sirius put to one side so the novel's plot can get underway. he'll go to bed mourning sirius and wake up in a sunlit bedroom. of course, ginny will walk into this bedroom too, only now things will be different: harry potter is back to the search for a loved one, for a family, and he's about to realise ginny is the one he wants to fill it. thus the start of the plot of ginny stepping into the role vacated by sirius beginneth.

so much of who ginny is in HBP is reminiscent of sirius. she frequently leaps into battle as harry’s protector (‘You’re taking orders from something someone wrote in a book?’, ‘Give it a rest, Hermione’), she’s scrappy (RIP zacharias smith), she’s funny and laughs easily in a way that less recalls sirius in the time harry knew him than sirius as harry sees him as a young man, in photographs or memories. she's the one who commits to the insane christmas decorations, determined to cheer everyone up over the festive period as sirius did the year before. she even enjoys the widespread admiration and lust of her peers, a trait that directly recalls sirius being eyed up by his peers in snape's memory. by the novel’s end, after dumbledore’s death, it will be ginny who goes to harry’s side after the climax of the plot and catch him in his grief just as sirius did in GoF, this time over dumbledore’s death: 

‘He did not want to leave Dumbledore’s side, he did not want to move anywhere. Hagrid’s hand on his shoulder was trembling. Then another voice said, “Harry, come on.’ A much smaller and warmer hand had enclosed his and was pulling him upward. He obeyed its pressure without really thinking about it.’

their breakup has sirius all over it. taking place at the lakeshore, the place where harry wept alone over sirius a year prior, harry draws on the circumstances of sirius’ demise as a reason he must break up with ginny (‘Voldemort uses people his enemies are close to.’) the breakup does little to shift what ginny has become in harry’s mind, though, and he spends all of DH thinking of her as he once thought of sirius: the person whose safety he most craves, the person he misses, someone he claims as his, and whom he associates with (now banished) hopes of a home and a family:

“It’s not a problem,” said Harry, sickened by the pain in his head. “It’s your family, ’course you’re worried. I’d feel the same way.” He thought of Ginny. “I do feel the same way.”

of course, echoes of sirius will also come into play during open war. it’s now ginny, not sirius, who is the one left behind for her own protection: in the run-up to the battle, harry finds himself once again faced with the prospect of confining his loved one for their safety, despite their desperation to fight and do the right thing. but these are thoughts for part 2…….

[chamiryokuroi]

My thoughts on Tim Drake: Robin #10 heavy spoilers under the cut

First of all got to say it wasn’t a bad ending if we consider they had to wrap up this arc in such a short amount of time, gotta give it to Meghan she managed to figure out a way to answer as many questions as possible and give us a relatively good ending for a series that I feel was canceled with no reason.

You can definitely feel that the story was planned to be done in more issues, the building blocks are all there for an amazing arc and it is sad we had to condense it all in one issue.

Now into a more in depth analysis of the comic of my favorite parts.

The Labyrinth was such and interesting point I wish we could have seen more of, specially with the fact this is the cult if Dionysus.

I absolutely adore the fact that Bernard is fully aware of Tim’s identiry because we get such funny interactions like this where Pie honestly thinks Tim is cheating on Bernard with Robin, and that panel of Bernard laughing because of that is one of my favorites for sure, boy is having so much fun, as he should.

Now in a more serious tone, this two panels tells us so much of how Tim feels, how insecure he is of his own place, not only on his family, but in the world as a whole. That second panel specifically where we see Bernard having fun while Tim is just on the bg, knowing how hard it must be for Tim to wrap his head around his sexuality even now, a year after coming out and starting dating Bernard, this feels realistic, sometimes when you come out later in life it feels as if you do not fit exactly with the community, and it can be hard to find your place.

If I had a nickel for every time a creepy cult tried to recruit Tim into their ranks I would have two nickels, which isn’t a lot but it is weird that it keeps happening.

This is honestly another point that feels like it was meant to be explored for longer before the cancelation notice came. At least it gives us an explanation of why Kate was acting the way she was, it took me a while to get it but basically after Tim saved Bernard from the cult back in Urban Legends Kate went around hunting down those that managed to escape, one of them being the son of this man that appears to be the leader of the cult, the son then took his own life and Kate was taken into the labyrinth, were we know Tim was being pumped with some hallucinogen gas of some sort, depending on how long she was on the labyrinth before managing to escape that might explain her memory loss, again this is all theorizing with what we are given since there wasn’t much space for it to be explain as it should.

And now we go back to Bernard who is looking around for Tim, going to all the people that knew him as Robin, and then those words “Tim takes care of everyone… but sometimes he needs someone to take care of him” hits me straight on the feels, Bernard is such a supportive boyfriend, he is definitely what Tim needs, someone that is there for him, not only for Tim, but also Robin.

Also the fact that Bernard is making his own homemade bat-signal with his hands is just adorable to me. Boy could had probably drove to Bruce’s house, but he doesn’t need Bruce’s help right now, he needs Batman.

And of course Batman responds. Bruce why were you following Bernard? Anyways, yet another great speech from Bernard “I thought you might be a ghost. Or you weren’t real. But the truth is you look sort of normal. Like regular-people normal.” Leave it to Bernard to understand exactly what Batman is, just a normal man trying to help as best as he can.

And then he says Tim needs help, not Robin, Tim. This is just Bernard out right telling Bruce “I know, and I don’t care, because Tim is in problem and you got to find him”

And then we get the best thing, Bernard, and Tim’s friends and family, rushing in to save him, just as he was losing hope of managing to leave the labyrinth alive. Absolutely in love with Bernard’s long ass coat.

And then we get to my favorite page. The uncertainty if it is really him or another hallucination, the confirmation that it is him, it is Bernard, here to save Tim. The hug, the way Tim is holding Bernard’s face, the only thing that would had made this better would had been a kiss.

And then we get to the ending, not much to say here, I just love these two pages, Tim just finally realizing he doesn’t need to be anyone else, that he can be himself and that he is right where he belong, and that he can be happy with that. The best ending we could have hope for with what we were allowed to have.

There are obviously many questions left unanswered.

What was exactly the Cult of Dionysus? Where did it came from?

What’s going on with Bernard’s parents?

What’s up with Moriarty? Who was his boss? What was his deal with Robin/Tim??

I am sad TD:R ended the way it did, had it been given the time to develop I feel it would had gotten better. But I am glad we managed to get as much as we did, now we just have to wait and see what will DC do now with Tim, and if Bernard will stay relevant or will they brush him under the rug.

[swirlingthings]

thinking about how in good omens, agnes nutter wrote a second volume of prophecies which anathema then burns. agnes must have known this would be the case, right? she knew other details about the second volume, such as the fact that giles baddicombe would be the one to open the box, so surely the fact that anathema would never read or act on them was something she was also very aware of.

my thinking is - agnes deliberately gave anathema a tangible, definitive way of actively choosing to step away from being a ‘professional descendant’. when armageddon was averted and the prophecy book finished, anathema would be at a loose end. her life’s purpose, the focus of her upbringing, has concluded. by presenting her with a second volume, knowing she would turn away from it, agnes gave anathema a way of signalling that she wanted to step away from that life and go her own way. anathema took her future into her own hands and moved away from the framework that agnes’ book gave her and her family by her own choice. even if agnes didn’t know this would happen and it wasn’t something she deliberately engineered, it was still anathema’s choice to move away from the structure of living by the prophecies.

which got me thinking about aziraphale, and his choice to go back to heaven. heaven’s moral framework underpins aziraphale’s life, and his character arc. he lives by their black and white ideology, and tries to promote their principles of goodness and truth as much as he can. in season 1, heaven prepares to finally settle things with hell in the war to come. their values and everything they stand for, everything they’ve worked to achieve on earth, is coming together with armageddon. it’s a pivotal moment for heaven and for aziraphale just like it is for anathema. when all is resolved, they are both left without the reassurance that comes with following the rules laid out for them by these frameworks. i talked about how aziraphale’s struggle to adjust to this is evident at the end of s1/start of s2 in my essay (pinned!).

the metatron offers aziraphale a chance to return to the framework, and he takes it. agnes offers anathema a chance to return to the framework, and she rejects it. aziraphale is clearly struggling with his sudden disconnect from heaven, whereas anathema seemed more reluctant to return to that life from the start.

yet another reason why aziraphale needed to be given the perfect offer to return to heaven: so he can realise, without a shadow of a doubt, that he has to step away from it. armageddon being averted wasn’t enough. that separated him from heaven, but only because it was the only way to save the world, which aziraphale knew was the right thing to do. it did not stop him from following heaven’s ideology. aziraphale has to choose to step away from it, actively and conclusively, like anathema did. he has to be the force which separates himself.

[rius-cave]

You know what would be funny? Let's say at this moment, Adam and Lucifer aren't exclusive but they are fucking and they have been for maybe two months. A new resident comes. We're calling her Rebecca. She is very into Adam but Adam can't tell she's interested because her signals are so "subtle". He's used to having girls say they want him with no kind of foreplay with words, not whatever this new girl is doing. So, he just thinks that she's a friendly girl and he's...okay around her? He's not picking fights or antagonizing her but he's also not going out of his way to be nice.

Rebecca: Look! I bought this new dress! What do you think?

Adam:...it's...a dress? I don't know what you want from me.

All this going on with Lucifer watching from the sidelines, sipping wine, and glaring at Rebecca who's smirking back at him. Oh, she knows what she's doing and she's not back down. She wants Adam and since they're not dating, he's free game.

Having other people stepping in and subsequently making either one of them jealous and forcing them to confront their feelings is such a great trope. Some people don't like jealousy arcs BUT THEY'RE MY GUILTY PLEASURE ALRIGHT AAAAHHHHHH I NEED THESE MEN TO SEETHE IN THEIR OWN RAGE WHILE FULLY KNOWING THEY SHOULDN'T FEEL THAT WAY HEHE

Also can I just say- You gave a nondescript demon and that works, but for some reason my mind provided with the possibility of "what if Rosie?" and then I started thinking.................. ngl Rosie x Adam? I'd watch that

[dfortrafalgar]

I'm Losing You... (But We're Filling the Cracks)

Having a family isn't always as easy as fairy tales make it seem.

Warnings: Read chapter 1 for warnings. (Me: i'm going to take a few days off to rest my head and proofread! Also me: *literally cannot rest without posting another chapter*)

The final arc of this story has officially begun!

Taglist: @phsycochan | @mirillua | @augustanna | @chaixsherlock | @whore-of-many-hot-men

Chapter 21

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Law knew exactly what was in the large, secured envelope the second he pulled it out of his mailbox in the lobby.  A large stamp accompanied by a handwritten address bar and an official wax seal holding the packet together made his grands grow clammy with anxiety as he took the elevator back up to the apartment, dreading opening the parcel to reveal the contents inside.  He hadn’t even consumed anything from the hefty packet in his hands, but already he was plagued with an overwhelming guilt.  With trembling fingers, he hunched over the kitchen counter and pulled the seal off of the envelope, flipping it open and removing the papers contained within.

New World Healthcare Dear TRAFALGAR D. WATER LAW, On behalf of your colleagues at New World Healthcare, we are delighted to invite you as an esteemed guest to the annual International Medical Multi-Specialty Conference hosted this year in Wano Kuni’s Flower Capital from August 15th - August 20th.   Due to your extensive contributions to the field of cardiothoracic surgery, you are being offered the opportunity to speak as part of a cardiovascular surgery demonstration panel.  We believe that attendees from the world’s most esteemed institutions would benefit greatly from your expertise, and your contribution to the conference will be unparalleled. Please send your notice of attendance to: NEW WORLD HEALTHCARE CORPORATION  321 PORTGAS DRIVE NEW MARINEFORD, NW 00021

“Fuck…” the black-haired man muttered under his breath.  His head shot up at the sound of the lock in the front door turning signaling your return from work, watching with a forlorn expression as you pushed open the door and entered your apartment with a smile.

“Oh, hi, baby!” you called excitedly as you kicked off your shoes.  You noticed almost instantly how pensive his expression was, however, and you were quick to drop your bag and cross the floor to be by his side.  “What’s the matter?”

Law pulled out one of the chairs of your kitchen table, plopping himself down into it with a huff as he passed the letter over to you.  He watched through weary eyes as you scanned the paper, taking in the esteemed words of recognition written to him by his hospital’s conglomerate.  He pinched the bridge of his nose in his fingers, trying to fight the tension headache that was brewing in his frontal lobe.

“Law, this is amazing!” you cheered, pulling out another chair to sit across from him.  “This is such an honor to speak at a conference this big!”  You gazed at your husband, concern flushing your features.  “Why are you upset?  This is a dream come true for you.”

Your husband trailed his hand down his face before it dropped onto the wooden table with a thunk.  “I know… it’s just… that’s the week you’re supposed to have your transfer done.”

Your own expression fell at the revelation, your heart aching at the sight of your husband’s uncomfortableness with not being able to be with you during your egg implantation procedure.  You had already started your ovarian stimulation injections a few days prior, and Law insisted on being able to make as many of your appointments as he could, not wanting to miss a single event with you after your second miscarriage.  He wasn’t there to protect you, and he’d be damned if he let you suffer alone ever again should anything happen.

“Baby…” you called, reaching your arm over the table to grasp his hand.  “I wouldn’t want you to miss this event just because of me.  This is such an incredible opportunity, one you’ve dreamed about since you were in medical school!”

“I know…” your husband sighed, taking your hand and brushing his inked digits over the glass ring on your right ring finger.  “I just… I just don’t feel good… missing your procedures.”

His words made you stand from your seat, walking around the table to sit in the chair closest to him so you could fully grasp his hand, tethering yourself to his nervous form.  “Law, look at me,” you pleaded.

Your husband’s anxious, golden eyes flicked over to your face, assessing your features.  You were focused, concentrated, almost daring in your expression.

“I have our friends to help me if I need it.  I could always have Ikkaku or Shachi or Penguin come with me for the transfer and help out with the dog.  I know you want to be there, and I want nothing more than for you to be there, too.  But I also don’t want you to miss this opportunity just because of me,” you explained.

“It wouldn’t be ‘just because of you,’” he sighed, repeating your words.  “Nothing I do for you is ‘just because.’”

Your eyebrows furrowed, your chest clenching.  You hadn’t even realized how inwardly self deprecating your phrase had been, but even still, you clung to your resolve.  “I know… I just really wouldn’t feel comfortable if you passed up this chance.  I can tell you want to go, Law.  I can see it.”

Law’s cheeks flushed with embarrassment as his steely eyes darted away from your gaze.  He clenched your hand harder.

“I want you to go and experience this.  We’ll be able to call each other every single day, and I’ll send you constant updates and pictures.  It’ll be like you never left!” you explained, hoping to draw some relief or contentment out of your husband’s clearly troubled mind.

Your enthusiastic grin did, in fact, do wonders to loosen Law’s worries as you watched his shoulders hunch ever so slightly and his jaw unclench.  He released a deep sigh from his lungs as he leaned into you, touching your shoulder with his.  “You’d really be okay if I left for that week?”

You nodded.  “I’d be even more okay if you brought me home some authentic snacks from the Flower Capital!”

Law’s lips finally curled into that genuine smile you loved so much as he snorted out a laugh at your request.  “I’ll need to bring an extra carry-on bag for all the gifts I can bring home to you.”

You giggled, throwing your arms around your husband’s neck, much more excited at the prospect of him deciding to attend his dream conference.  “I’m so proud of you, Law.  You’ve become such a big name in the medical world that you’re being invited to speak at a conference…” your voice was almost dreamy as you spoke.  “My husband… a big shot in Wano… I almost wish I could go with you just so I can rub it into everyone’s face,” you added with a mischievous smile.

Law pulled you closer to him, lightly pinching his fingers against the soft flesh of your hip and making you squeal in surprise.  “I’ll change my phone wallpaper to a picture of you, so if anyone looks they’ll know that I’ve got a smokeshow of a wife waiting for me at home.”

You pulled away from him slightly, a playful pout on your face.  “Is your wallpaper not already a picture of me?”

“Nope.  It’s a picture of Bepo’s fat ass,” he confirmed.

“Okay, that makes me feel a bit better,” you added.  “My wallpaper is a hot character from that anime I’ve been watching.”

Law frowned playfully as he stood from his chair, scooping you into his arms.  “I’ll make you regret that.”

“Law!” you yelped, laughing and lightly batting his shoulder as he carried you to your bedroom.  “I promise I’ll change it!  I promise!”

—

Robin had told you prior to your first ovarian stimulation injection that some side effects common with shifts in hormones could occur, and you were beginning to regret not fully listening to her advice, assuming that the side effects would be similar to a standard period.  Especially now that you were finishing your final cycle of injections at home after a brief training period with the needle and syringe.

Oh how wrong you were.

Shachi made a passing comment while stopping over with some food that you seemed more emotional than usual, which rendered you a blubbering, sobbing mess, and left him with a sizable bruise on his bicep from a harsh punch from Penguin.  While at work, Usopp made the hellish, poorly thought out decision of asking if you had gained some weight, which sent you crying to the bathroom while Ikkaku chased after you, Nami and Sanji berating your friend and coworker for his rude remark.  You were far more fatigued than usual, your headaches being more prominent and far more annoying, and you constantly felt bloated.  You tried to get Bepo to step on your stomach in hopes that you could release a rip current of a fart from deep in your bowels, but Law put a stop to that real quick.  Which then resulted in another wave of involuntary tears, beyond frustrated at the gas in your abdomen.

On the night following your final injection, you were lying curled up on your side on the couch, sobbing into Law’s lap as he idly petted your hair, leaning his other arm over the armrest of the couch while balancing his chin on his knuckles.  A rerun of an old medical drama series was playing on the television.

“Law…” you blubbered, sniffling onto his pants.

“Yes, baby?” he asked, half paying attention to you.

“How have you not left me yet?” you whined.  “I’ve been… s-so… annoying…”

Law suppressed a chuckle.  “You’re not annoying, love.”

“Yes I ammmm…” you complained, drawing out your words.  “I’m hormonal… I can’t wait for this to be over…”

“You’re hormonal, yes, but that doesn’t mean you’re annoying,” he reassured.  “Robin told you these side effects might happen.  Now that you’re done with your injections, hopefully your symptoms die down soon.”

You rotated slightly, enough to peer up at him through blurry, teary eyes.  “Will you still love me if I’m an annoying, cranky pregnant lady?”

Law grinned, mildly amused with the hoops you were jumping through in your hazy, hormonal mind.  “Of course I will.”

“Even if I get mad at you for something stupid?” you asked, unaware of just how much validation you were desperate to receive from your doting husband.

“Even if you get mad at me, yes,” he confirmed with a smirk.

“Will you still love me even when I get fat and wrinkly?” you sniffled.  “Even when my boobs get saggy?”

Law was restraining every muscle in his body to not laugh at your sorry state.  He truly did feel awful for you, that your mandatory injections were making you feel so miserable, but to him, the truth of your questions was undeniable.  He was content with constantly reminding you of just how beautiful you were to him, in every stage of life.  “I’ll love you even when you’re wrinkly,” he said, gently patting your cheek.  “And you’re not fat, you’re beautiful.”

“Can fat be beautiful?” you asked, blinking some stray tears from your eyes.

“Yes, it can be.  But I don’t like using that word,” he explained.

“Then what word would you use?”

Law pondered briefly, gazing at your curled up form on his lap.  “Healthy,” he responded.  “Sexy.  Squishy, even.”  He punctuated his word by gently squeezing the soft flesh of your waist, making a grin crack onto your lips.  To even the playing field, he asked, “Will you love me even when I’m old and wrinkly?”

You sucked in another sharp sniffle.  “You’re gonna be so fucking hot when you’re old.”

Your words finally made Law lose his restraint, a laugh forcing its way from his mouth and making him place his free hand over his face to hide his amusement.  In one week from now when you were (hopefully) feeling more like your usual self, you were going to be beyond embarrassed remembering what you had said in your vulnerable state.  He needed to enjoy this now while he could.

“Alright, sexy, I think you should get some rest,” he cooed, reaching for the remote to turn off the TV.

You looped your arms around his neck, hiding your swollen, flustered face in his shirt collar.  “Carry me?”

Law chuckled.  “Of course.”

—

“Text me the second you land,” you demanded, holding your husband’s inked hands in your own at the gate outside of the airline security check-in line.  It was far too early in the morning for you, but you refused to let your husband leave for his conference without a proper goodbye.  “And send me pictures!  And call me!”

Law leaned down to peck a kiss on your lips which you happily reciprocated, whining slightly under your breath when he pulled away.  “Please send me updates when you can.”

“Of course, baby,” you cooed, your voice gentle and soft as you pulled your husband in for a tight hug.  “It’ll only be seven days…”

“Seven days too many…” he sighed back into your neck, squeezing your waist.  He reluctantly pulled away from you, shifting his attention to Shachi who awkwardly rocked on his feet from side to side.  “And you…”

Shachi’s concealed gaze turned toward Law as he pointed one of his fingers at himself, mouthing, ‘Me?’

“You and Penguin better take good care of her while I’m gone,” he demanded, his voice stern yet still retaining his usual mischievousness he displayed around his best friends.

“Yes, captain!” Shachi called back, holding up a mock salute as if part of a pirate crew.  

The sight made you giggle as you rubbed your husband’s arm, leaning upwards to press one last kiss against his cheek.  His skin was soft, having just trimmed his facial hair and sideburns that morning in preparation for his trip.  You wished he could stay so you could kiss his soft skin all day until his usual scruff grew back, but alas, he had an international crowd to impress.  “I love you, baby,” you called.

“I love you, too,” he replied, shouldering his carry-on bag.  “See you in seven days.”

“Safe travels, Law!” Shachi called over your shoulder, making you smile.

With one last grin and a wave of his free hand, you watched as he collected his rolling suitcase and proceeded to the security line to enter the airport terminal.  You turned your attention toward Shachi, whose chest was puffed out in a prideful display.

“I’m going to be the best damn caregiver to you,” he uttered, jokingly flexing his shoulders.

You laughed, grabbing his arm to lead him back to the airport’s main exit so you could return to your car and grab breakfast somewhere.  “Hey now, I’m still able to be independent.  Don’t think I’m going to let you take over everything in my house just because of my procedure in a few days!”

Shachi huffed, pulling his car keys out of his pocket as the two of you walked through the small drop-off parking area to his car.  You and Law were fortunate enough to afford two fairly decent cars, both of your vehicles being older models of used sedans that you kept very well maintained.  Shachi’s car on the other hand was… less well off.

It was a 1995 SUV of some kind.  The metal radiator emblem that was previously situated on the front was no longer attached, and there were no indicator decorations on the rear bumper to indicate what make and model the car was.  It came with no user manual, and when he purchased it from a random number he found on the side of the road, it was basically given to him free of charge with two completely flat tires and a completely rusted through exhaust.  The red-head had done a great deal of work on the beat-up vehicle, completely replacing the interior seats, adding an up-to-date dashboard and radio system, and giving the exterior a few new coats of shiny paint among other technical improvements, but the old beater really showed its age when you watched your friend shove the key into the ignition and twist with the force of a powerlifter to ignite the engine.

The entire car shook as the engine roared to life, the sound almost deafening through the thin metal doors.  Out of habit, you grabbed on to the handle built into the inside of the door, a futile attempt at securing yourself.  Seat belts could only do so much when the car rattled like a scared dog.

“Still haven’t fixed the shaking yet?” you asked, trying to hide your concern as Shachi yanked on the gear shift, putting the car in reverse and throwing his arm over the back of your seat to exit his narrow parking spot.

“I can’t figure out where it’s coming from,” he replied, annoyance on his tongue.  “I’m shocked this stupid thing is still running.  Sometimes I feel like the floor is going to give out.”

You tossed a worried glance down at the car’s floor beneath your feet.  There were a few discarded food wrappers and plastic water bottles strewn about, a plethora of various colors of crumbs in the small nooks and crannies of the floor and around the fabric floor mat.  You made a mental note to not let Shachi take your [hopefully] future child anywhere in his car.

Nevertheless, the car successfully rumbled to the drive through window of a small breakfast restaurant, where you excitedly ordered two coffees and two donuts for the two of you.  

Shachi took a generous sip of his coffee as he drove.  “So what’s the plan, again?  Just so that I know what this week is gonna look like.”

You nodded, taking a small nibble of your donut and washing it down with a sip of your own drink.  “Today I’m getting the injection that will trigger my eggs, and on Wednesday I’ll be having the extraction procedure.  I chose to stay awake and just use local anesthesia, so you won’t have to worry about me being loopy, but I won’t be able to drive before or after.  That’s what I hopefully have you guys for!”  The car rattled as Shachi lightly depressed the brakes, driving around morning traffic.  “If this car doesn’t kill me before then, anyway.”

“Hey, she’s a beater but she’s still moving!” Shachi pestered back, defending his rusting hunk of metal.  He smiled, his toothy grin bringing you a sense of familiar contentment.  “Sounds good, though.  What kind of process is this, anyway?”

“Do you want the simple explanation or the complicated one?” you asked, placing your coffee into one of your friend’s crumb-filled cup holders.

“Simple, please,” he replied, his voice slightly desperate for an easy-to-digest explanation.

“Basically, I’ve taken some medication to make sure my eggs are mature.  Some of them get removed from my body, and they’re fertilized in a dish.  When they grow enough, if they grow at all, they’re placed back in my body where they’ll hopefully become a fetus.”

Shachi nodded, though you were unsure if any of what you just said stuck with him.  “So where does Law come in?”

“He already had his sperm harvested and frozen,” you responded.  You were counting your blessings in your head, though, as neither of you had any idea that Law would be leaving the week of your procedure.  Fate must have been on your side when he elected to freeze the sperm that was collected for his second precautionary fertility test.

“Did they have him jack off into a cup or something?” Shachi asked, taking another sip of his coffee.

“Unfortunately,” you joked in response.  You doubted your husband would want to go into the details, knowing the tendency of his best friends to poke fun at his shortcomings, but the thought nevertheless made you chuckle.  “Hey, can we stop by the grocery store before we head back to the apartment?  I want to pick up a few things.”

Shachi, with his mouth full of donut, flashed you an excited thumbs up.  You grinned, taking a delicate sip of your coffee as you gazed out the passenger window, the sun slowly rising above the horizon.

[twig-tea]

Communication styles, mirroring, and new relationship growing pains in Cooking Crush

In Cooking Crush ep7 we get a lot of really cute moments and really wonderful plot arcs that fly in the face of BL tropes (Nobly ghosting your crush because you think their life is better without you? Breaking up rather than simply agreeing to take time apart to focus or be in different places? Not clarifying your feelings? Making assumptions about your partner's physical comfort levels? Ten said not today, Satan!).

And! We also got a lot of more subtle goodness that I want to take a second to highlight around the feeling out of their relationship that happens between Ten and Prem in this episode. They each try out ways of showing affection, and of communicating, and it sometimes lands and sometimes doesn't, and they also take turns trying out one another's methods on each other! They slowly start to use more of each other's styles, and they get better and better at understanding one another as a result. I'm mildly obsessed, so let's break it down.

First, after Ten blocks Prem from leaving (communicating that he needs an explanation--first with his actions and then with words), we get Prem trying out the cute nuzzle-y apology in the grocery store, and then going in for a peck kiss (and Ten meeting him immediately and then getting flustered, loved this!). This was such a good moment because Prem uses the kiss in place of words, to indicate his feelings (he says "do you know now? you're not the only one" but doesn't specify he's talking about his feelings). This theme comes back in the episode later.

[gif by @gunsatthaphan; full set here]

At the cafe, Ten lies about having eaten and then not having eaten to appease Prem, and Prem immediately noticing and pinching him about it--this white lie for Prem's peace of mind clearly did not land well.

And then Ten tries to make up with him by mirroring the way Prem did to him in the grocery store (the cute nuzzling). And this seems to land better; Prem eventually gets flustered but tells him it was cute. And then Ten goes to get Prem food, because feeding one another is already an established-effective form of communication for them. Ten comes back and makes a really cheesy pun about sweet food/soulmates and it does not land and he sits a bit ashamedly back down.

[Ignore the two caption formatting styles, that was me being too lazy to go back to WeTV but wanting more screenshots so getting them from YouTube.]

He tries physical touch again instead, by reaching out with his foot. And again, it doesn't land, Prem confusedly asks him what he's doing. And then Prem accidentally (?) reciprocates--awkwardly because he doesn't really get it. And so Ten explains that this was supposed to be a signal that they should kiss some more. He decides to use words, and this works! Prem nods and goes with him to make out against some very unstable bookshelves lol

Ten asks Prem if he wants to continue--using words because that's what has worked best so far--and Prem gives him the green light nod again.

And so they try again, and again get interrupted, and Ten gives up. But this time Prem uses Ten's method--words--to ask if he wants to continue, and Ten gives him the green-light nod back! Again, they continue to mirror one another's styles of communication when they see it works.

[Both this and the previous gif above done by @tenprems, with full gifset of this exchange and the mirrored nods available here]

This next tiny moment was cut from the YouTube version, but in the car, Prem gives Ten another one of the now-established-as-effective green light nods before jumping into his lap lol Loved these continuous check-ins and establishing of mutual interest!

Back in the cafe after giving up on making out--and how much do I love the frustration about not just being able to kiss all the time, and not having a good place to go because they both live with their families, this was so relatable--Ten says his feelings outright (this is the Ten way) and tries cuddling in again, because Prem said he thought it was cute before, and Prem responds positively by verbally saying he feels the same, which gets Ten to pop back up in excitement because this is the first time Prem has said aloud he has feelings!

I love this moment that follows because it establishes just how differently the two of them think about communication. Ten, until now, was unsure about Prem's feelings because Prem never said them aloud. Now that he has, Ten takes that as a signal to ask if they can move to the talking/hitting-on stage. Prem looks at him like he's ridiculous, because they just made out in three separate locations lol and points out that obviously they're already past that stage. To Prem, his actions should have been clear enough to communicate enough of his feelings to Ten. Again, like in the grocery store, Prem thinks actions are explicit and clear, while Ten finds them ambiguous and wants clear and explicit words. And as they continue testing and mirroring communication methods on these dates, Prem starts to use more words and Ten uses more actions, and they understand one another better.

[gif by @gunsatthaphan full set here]

Later in the episode, Prem brings Ten food, because as mentioned this is an established as effective communication method for them. He overhears the fight with Ten and his father, and leaves, because that conversation underscored his worst fears about his relationship with Ten--that he'd make Ten's life worse by being in it. Prem defaults back to his usual methods of communication--avoidance and action--and Ten holds him back and uses his words to describe his feelings. And Prem goes back to meeting him halfway and responds with words! He explains exactly how he feels to Ten.

And in response, Ten goes for action to comfort Prem--he knows this speaks to Prem more by this point.

And then he goes back to words and explains his plan to Prem to stay apart for now so that they can be together in future. Later, Prem runs into Ten at the cafe, and goes to touch him--again, action being his primary language of communication. He goes to leave and Ten asks him to stay, and explains with words that he'll be out of town for the mid-semester break. He asks Prem for a lunchbox for the trip--again, asking for their tried-and-true food in order to get reassurance of Prem's feelings for while they're apart. And Prem, in response, uses his words to confirm that he knows he's in Ten's heart. He then asks Ten for physical affection in return ("recharge my battery").

I love this moment in particular because it does three things:

Establishes that Prem is more interested in Ten's love than his money

Combines their communication styles by both being physical and verbal since Prem explained verbally that this hug was important to him

Confirms in Prem's style (non-verbal communication) that he's still open to physical affection even given their slightly ambiguous status.

And Ten immediately acknolwedges receipt of this message by kissing Prem--again using Prem's preferred communication method and mirroring his actions in the grocery store at the start of the episode--and then following it up with a verbal explanation (because he's Ten).

In the final scene of the episode, Prem brings Ten the food as promised, but explains he also included a written note with the food (more explicit communication!). And Ten responds to that by offering a hug. Every time one of them tries to meet the other halfway, the other does too, and it gives me LIFE.

Prem pulls away, and Ten checks in verbally, but Prem doesn't run off like usual. He stays to explain, because he's learned now that Ten needs that verbal reassurance around what's going on with him. And Ten responds physically, by wiping away Prem's tears.

He then tries this cheesy thing with the glasses as a metaphor, and it does not land, Prem is too practical.

[gif by @gunsatthaphan, full set here]

But he does make another metaphor about seeing only him--again, meeting Ten halfway. And then he tries to make a joke about how he, Prem, would flirt around while Ten is away, and again it does not land lol. He immediately backtracks and instead makes a cheesy pun, mirroring the one that Ten made in the cafe that did not land at all for Prem, and for Ten it clearly lands, he looks quietly really charmed by this. I loved this so much, there's something extra sweet about someone who hates puns making a pun for you because they know you love them.

And then Prem says explicitly and clearly in words, "I promise I will wait for you".

Ten starts his journey and opens the lunchbox, and reads the note from Prem. Unlike the previous (often partially failed) attempts that Prem has made to communicate his feelings through food without explaining what he was trying to say (I'm thinking of when he made that lunchbox full of things that turned out to be food Ten doesn't like, or when he made all of Ten's favourite foods and brought it to school pretending it was leftovers but the fact that Ten had read Prem's deleted text message made Ten understand that it was actually for him), this time Prem has explained with words exactly what he was trying to express with his choice in food.

These forays into feeling out one another's communication styles, styles of humour, finding one another's hard lines (don't lie to make me feel better; don't joke about cheating on me) and just getting a sense of what works and what the other needs, this is bread and butter early relationship stuff, and the show is quietly depicting it so well. I had such a great time watching Ten and Prem not just fall in love, but learn how to effectively be in a relationship with each other this episode!

Huge thanks to the giffers @gunsatthaphan and @tenprems being fast enough to make gifs that I could include in this meta! If anyone gifs any of these other scenes I described, especially the battery recharge and Ten popping up excitedly hearing Prem use his words, please tag me!~

[jessicas-pi]

ok look i need to elaborate on the Satine Accidentally Creates A Mandalorian Empire (also adopts people) AU because once i start talking i can't stop.

This all starts because Satine isn't searched thoroughly enough when she's captured by Death Watch. Because a pacifist Duchess wouldn't carry any weapons, right?

Wrong! Just because she's a pacifist doesn't mean she won't defend herself, remember? It just so happens that she carries a deactivator pistol, which shoots energy blasts capable of taking out droids, and it also just so happens that Death Watch's new leader is part droid.

Satine disables Maul's legs moments before she would have been impaled.

Bo-Katan tries not to cackle as she informs Satine that she is technically the new owner of the Darksaber. In any other situation, Bo would be furious, but the irony of it is just too much.

Anyway, time skip ahead. Satine is trying to maintain Mandalore's neutrality in the war while also keeping the Nite Owls on a metaphorical backpack leash and negotiating with the remaining Mauldalorians. She refuses to carry the Darksaber, so Bo puts it in storage with Satine's old armor. (The Ahsoka-on-Mandalore arc doesn't happen, FYI.) Then, they get news of the whole Empire deal. The Death Watch Mandalorians try to throw a party at the news of Order 66.

Then Obi-Wan shows up on their doorstep with a heavily pregnant senator and a little girl.

Padme is brought to a medcenter for treatment, and with better care, she survives the birth of her children.

But more important than that is Reva Sevander.

Because in this universe, Obi-Wan sensed one single light in the darkness of the temple, and lifted the trembling girl from the pile of bodies she'd hidden herself in. Obi-Wan takes her to Mandalore along with Padme. A Mandalorian doctor treats her wounds as she breaks down, sobbing out the truth of what happened.

Soon enough, rumors are flying from Mandalorian to Mandalorian, murmuring that the Jedi children were slaughtered too.

Some warrior Mandalorians hate Jedi more than they love children. Most of them love children more than they hate Jedi.

They nearly start another civil war over which one of the clans should be allowed to adopt the jet'ika girl. Finally, Satine steps in, proclaiming that this fighting is only hurting Initiate Sevander, and that the child will be Satine's personal ward.

Word gets out.

Vader sends his first Inquisitor on a mission to kill the Initiate and any Mandalorians who dare to defy the Empire's orders.

Bo-Katan sends the Inquisitor back in several pieces.

(The Empire decides to hold off on attacking Mandalore just yet.)

Anyway, Vader isn't the only one to hear about Satine adopting a Jedi girl. Word spreads to others.

Ahsoka comes first, dragging a tied-up clone Captain and demanding the use of a medcenter immediately. A few weeks later, Kelleran Beq and Grogu arrive. Caleb Dume follows, too weary to be afraid of what could happen to him.

Mandalore--which is nearly next door to Dathomir--picks up a distress signal that nobody else could have. Bo-Katan and squad of Nite Owls (including their newest recruit, Ahsoka) investigate, and they bring home a ragged Jedi and a little girl. Satine, who will never regret helping the Jedi but has been getting severe stress headaches at the number of floating objects in her life, nearly breaks down in tears when she hears the Dathomirian child excitedly discussing the undead with their newest Jedi rescue, a redhead boy who won't explain why he refuses to take off his gloves. She didn't sign up for this she didn't sign up for this she didn't sign up for this--

It doesn't stop her from taking in each new Jet'ika they find. The Sundari palace is full of younglings, and while Bo-Katan complains about it frequently, she's having so much fun as the wine aunt to two dozen miniature Jedi (and she even encourages her Nite Owls to listen for rumors of surviving Jedi and rescue them).

(Ahsoka becomes the unofficial go-to babysitter for Sabine and Tristan, and while I'm not a fan of Force-sensitive Sabine in canon, the hilarity of it in this AU is too much to pass up because imagine Ursa's face when Ahsoka breaks it to her that so um just FYI your daughter has space magic.)

Okay, enough about the Jedi (for now.) On to the war against the Empire!

So, Satine has been facing a lot of moral dilemmas, including what do you do when your enemies are evil and they're attacking your borders and they really can't be reasoned with? and she's solved most of them by giving Bo-Katan begrudging permission to "handle it." She's made it very clear that civilian casualties are absolutely unacceptable, and Bo-Katan huffs and says fiiiiine.

But then a nearby planet besieged by the Empire sends a plea for help. What can Satine do? Refusing goes against everything she stands for, but this would be a counterattack by Mandalore, not just self-defense!

In the end, there's no other answer. She sends the Nite Owls (and a Jedi who volunteered) to help the people and hopes that will be the end of it. She has her hands full already just trying to protect Mandalore!

But it happens again. And again. Satine still refuses to start a war against the Empire.

That changes when Sundari itself is full-on attacked.

Now, here's the thing about Satine.

She wasn't always peaceful.

It was the aftermath of the civil war--the destruction, the death, the needless suffering without a purpose, the fighting that she had been a part of--that made her a pacifist.

But when she runs to the palace window to look out at the city, listens to the bombs falling and the frantic comms from Bo-Katan's forces about the losing battle and the dying civilians, sees the Jedi rushing to shelter their children because one reason the Empire is here is to kill them, Satine remembers why she fought.

She spent fifteen years rebuilding Mandalore to be a peaceful, thriving society that no longer destroyed itself, and now someone else has come to burn it to the ground.

"Bring me my armor," she commands in a low, cold voice. "And the Darksaber."

The Empire is about to find out what happens when a pacifist goes to war.

[billpottsismygf]

The Devil's Chord! This was my most highly anticipated episode of the series because of The Beatles - who I'm very nostalgic for, sue me - but they had a much smaller part than I expected. That may be for the best, as the actors don't look anything like the real deal, but they did an admirable job considering the circumstances.

I love the idea behind this one. I'm a musician myself and love things about music. Music being important, music being holy, I love it all. Everything from Maestro playing us into the theme tune, to the way it aligns with the characters' established personalities (the Doctor's jukebox and Ruby's band), made me very happy. The music battle was especially cool. Very The Devil Went Down to Georgia. Out there, but I liked it a lot.

Maestro was also a lot. I liked them, though. Great costumes, great performance. A campy villain in the best way. They're the Toymaker's child, which is interesting in itself, and I like that the rules around fair play seemed to extend to them as well.

There was a lot of series arc stuff here. So, Ruby has Carol of the Bells deeply ingrained within her. There was some important figure (another of the Pantheon, presumably) at her birth - is Ruby herself a child of the Pantheon? More snow, as well. There's also the One Who Waits coming up again. It all feels a little too self-conscious and crammed in - "remember, there's pay-off coming for these random mysteries that you have no context for!". I know we live in an era of heavily serialised media, in large part because of streaming and the binge model, and obviously Doctor Who has been semi-serialised since the revival, but it just seems like a lot. Maybe even too much, especially since the first episode was quite heavy with it too.

Although, I did wonder if this one was meant to be later in the series. First Ruby saying "you never hide" and then "you always know what to do" signaled a far longer association with the Doctor than she has had, but then it was especially jarring when she said it was hard to keep track of when her time is and it could be June or July... That sounds like someone who's been travelling with the Doctor for a while, not like someone who's on their second trip. And it was Christmas for her only last episode. Obviously there can be off-screen trips, but usually for the first couple of episodes we want to feel that this is the start of their journey as the audience gets to know them. Did this get plucked from later in the series and dropped into the episode 2 slot? Because it seems a bit of a shame, if so.

There was a lot of fourth wall breaking in this one as well. There was a wink to camera each from Maestro and the Doctor, as well as the Doctor's comment about thinking the music was non-diegetic (a nice little moment that probably a lot of people will miss). I do quite like a meta moment, and particularly loved the Twelfth Doctor's partaking in them, but I wonder if these serve a particular purpose, because we also had Mrs Flood talking to camera at the end of the Christmas special. Since RTD seems to be going with a theme that the rules of the universe have changed and become a bit more magical, I wouldn't be surprised if the meta elements tied in somehow.

Then, this is less meta and more fully surreal, but that whole ending musical number was... odd. I don't know what I think about it yet. The Doctor with his wink and "there's always a twist at the end" seemed to signal that we were leaving the normal reality of the show, but then... Did that musical number literally happen? How about the Abbey Road zebra crossing acting like a piano? It's part of my specific brand of autism that I struggle with surreal things when it's not clear how/whether they relate to the more realistic things going on, so maybe other people love it. It just made me feel confused, though, and slightly annoyed. I expected a musical number because the trailers showing this made that fairly clear, but I'd assumed it would be explicitly connected to the strange happenings of the episode. Instead it's just plonked at the end after everything has been fixed.

A lot of this latter stuff sounds quite negative, but overall I really liked this one! As I said before, the music stuff speaks to me personally very much, and I'll withhold final judgement about the serialisation stuff and even the meta/surreal stuff, as it may well pay off yet.

Small things

Love their outfits so much, and obviously we've known about them for a while, but it was funny they were worried about blending in when both of them (especially Ruby) were wearing pretty 60s adjacent outfits at the start. The Doctor was more 70s, but I don't think many people would have looked askance.

Ahhhh, Fifteen mentioning that One was in the junkyard made me exceedingly happy! The speculation about what happened to Susan also has me hoping beyond hope that this might be set-up for a Susan return.

I loved that extended instrumental scene where Ruby just played on the rooftop and people listened. It was quite moving!

Love hearing the word "lesbians" on Doctor Who <3 - I don't think even Bill explicitly got to use that word!

Just the general queerness is really nice. Ruby writing a song for her friend's gay break up. Maestro being they/them and it not really being a thing beyond their introduction. Ruby's mum having a "girlfriend" who was a Beatles fan that makes me wonder if that's in the platonic or gay sense.

I want to know the behind the scenes details of how they chose the music they did, especially when it comes to the chords that both summon and banish Maestro.

Henry the child is real and alive at the end! (Though it's during the musical number, so I guess real is dubious.) When he vanished into nothingness (and his music teacher didn't seem to care), I had thought he wasn't real. Does he have his own world-ending powers?

The Doctor referring to bigeneration as having had his soul "torn in half". Hmm, don't like that! I won't rehash my feelings on bigeneration here, but this implies that there is not continuity between the end of Fourteen and the start of Fifteen, which mucks up one of the only ways I could hold onto being just about okay with it.

[forthbeaming]

maybe its because i started watching the show without having any idea what it is about (saw some gifs on ehere and thought it was pretty neat) but i really thought that charles is not straight?? edwin my repressed little edwardian babyboy was painfully obvious. the whole arc of him coming to terms with his sexuality perfectly written. but charles. i was so confused when i went o the internets after watching the show and found out that he is canonically not queer? I saw hum being all chaotic and just fabulous and I was like, yup, u r one of us boy. with his mannerisms, the time he lived in and the way he dresses. for me, he wasn't even bi coded. he was blasting the purple-blue signal everywhere he went. so imagine my surprise when i found out that some people did not in fact considered him a bi icon?!?!? also i think i read somewhere that later in the comics he comes out as bi so i wasnt entirely wrong ! anyway, does this makes any sense? no i don't think so but that's pretty normal for me

[aihoshiino]

can i interest you in a penny for your thoughts about aqua and ruby's relationship in the current stages of the manga? ruby's clearly projecting and im pretty sure aqua is kind of blocking that entire conversation? hes acknowledged it but i think hes avoiding thinking too much about it (in part due to *waves hand at entire movie arc* all that)

gosh since you've twisted my arm i have NO CHOICE...

But yeah, I think Ruby is pretty clearly doing a lot of projecting here — the consistency with which she's started calling Aqua 'Sensei' really jumps out to me and it makes me pretty certain she's basically completely overwritten Aqua with Gorou in her brain, completely discarding the 18ish years he's lived as her brother in favour of just viewing him as the doctor who supported her.

This is a two-part process of denial, imo. The first and most obvious is Ruby trying to convince herself that her supposed romance with Gorou can still happen and it's not the first time her sort of naive stubbornness on that topic has come up — we saw this before during the Private arc when it came to their age gap.

Like girl, I respect the cope but he would be nearly fifty old by now. That man would be old enough to be your dad LMFAO.

If Ruby can delulu herself about an age gap of that size, she can easily also come up with an excuse for herself as to why she would be able to date him now he's her brother. I mean, if you think about it, they're not really actually twins, right? They're just strangers who happened to be born together! Since he's really Gorou and NOT!!!!! her brother, there's nothing wrong with it!

It should go without saying that this is a pretty absurd justification and imo, not one I think the manga is wanting the reader to uncritically buy into. Ruby's feelings here are, I think, intentionally being portrayed as naive and pretty childish. The framing around Ruby when she talks about Aqua in this regard is consistently exaggerated and comedic in a way that is a pretty clear signal, at least to me, that she should not be taken seriously.

This could only read more plainly as shoujo brainrot exaggeration if Aqua's chin was seven inches long and sharp enough to cut glass...

Beyond the denial of convincing herself that this romance still has any chance to happen, I also think this is denial in the sense of grief, too. In a very real sense, by entirely superimposing Gorou over Aqua, Ruby is denying that his death has happened at all. She doesn't want to acknowledge the possibility that he could be different now, especially not in any way that is emotionally inconvenient for her. Because acknowledging that this change occurred and that Gorou is no longer the Gorou she needs him to be would force Ruby to accept that her beloved sensei really is gone forever.

It should go without saying but this erasure of Aqua's identity is, of course, cruel. It's a dehumanizing rejection of his personhood. That's not to say that Ruby is A Bad Person for doing this— she's a fucked up kid dealing with a INSANELY fucked up situation and I think it would be unreasonable to expect her to handle all this entirely gracefully. But I also don't know that Ruby is even aware that she's doing what she's doing, because she doesn't quite get that her relationship with her identities and her reincarnation is different to his.

The continuity of identity between Sarina and Ruby is more or less entirely unbroken— she sees herself equally as both girls. More specifically, as Ruby herself puts it in 115, Sarina and Ruby are both 'roles' played by the 'real her'; both equal in weight and authenticity. I think she expects this to be the same for Aqua as well but this simply is not the case, or at least it's not anymore.

My read on Aqua's identity is that while he used to have a similarly unbroken continuity of identity, the trauma of witnessing Ai's death created a split and separated the two. It's not that Aqua is entirely separate from Gorou or entirely unaffected by his past life but Aqua himself & the supporting framing of the manga draws a pretty clear line of distinction between the two of them that does not seem to exist for Ruby and Sarina. In fact, Gorou is explicitly portrayed as a negative, invading force, an unnatural encroacher whose presence in Aqua's life is actively preventing him from finding happiness and stability.

To Ruby, it seems natural for these two identities to comingle, or for one's priorities to cancel the other's out. For Aqua, this same overriding of priorities is the thing that causes him anguish. In fact, I don't think it's too much of a leap for me to say that Aqua does not want to be Gorou full stop.

With all that laid out, I think you can pretty easily see how that conflict starts writing itself. Ruby ignoring and erasing the 18 years that Aqua has lived as her brother to assign him the identity of a man he doesn't want to be... the discomfort of someone he has only ever had familial feelings towards projecting romance onto him... the Squick of it all... no wonder Aqua is doing his best to just not deal with it. I can't really blame him.

Something I also think is informing Aqua's behavior right now is guilt. As he puts it to Memcho in 130, he's using everything he can to ensure the movie's success and I think this also includes manipulating Ruby.

We get some hints at this idea from Crow Girl both in 123 and 127. She sardonically notes "aren't you glad?" that Ruby seems to have reacted so positively to this reveal and explicitly ties Ruby's wellbeing to Aqua being able to make the movie. Later, after Aqua's just witnessed the final script be delivered to the B-Komachi girls, she notes that Aqua has the expression of a person who has made the choice to "hurt people and to get hurt".

Ruby's shoujo brain reads of Aqua's intentions also are important in establishing this, I think -- these clearly read as intended comedy beats to me, both in their exaggeration and the fact that she is so obviously misreading Aqua's character and his intentions because of her rose tinted glasses. As that Netflix show about the cartoon show once said, the thing about seeing someone through rose tinted glasses is that all the red flags just look like flags. In keeping Ruby happy, Aqua is making sure she herself doesn't become inconvenient to the movie's creation.

I think you can see that idea of like, guilt and discomfort manifesting as avoidance in the twins' first proper on-page exchange since this reveal, in 132:

I didn't catch this initially (so sorry to the person on the OnK subreddit who did -- I completely forgot your UN!) but not only do we never get a proper unobscured look at Aqua's face during this exchange but he also never once looks directly at Ruby as they talk. His body language & expression at the end (literally averting his gaze!) just screams discomfort to me.

That's not to say that Aqua revealing himself to her was entirely cynically motivated -- I think he completely genuinely loves her both as her brother, Aqua, and as Gorou, the man who cared for a deathly sick child when she had no one else in the world by her side. But that's just the problem— Aqua's love for her is the thing that makes his manipulation of her so painful. He's taking advantage of his sister's emotional vulnerability and their unique connection to use her in a way that completely betrays and desecrates the bond of trust they should otherwise share. And he's aware that if (or, as I'm beginning to worry, when) this comes out, Ruby is going to crash even harder as a result.

[solar-sparky]

Could you tell us more about your agent 24 (if you do agent 24) if you would be so kind 👉👈?

Rubs my hands together with malicious intent

Okay so! Let's talk about Char (Charlie/Agent 3) and Al (Allen/Phyto/Agent8) these two goobers :)

(They/Them and He/She respectively)

A bit of background for each:

Char experienced something in the past that caused them to be way more solitary, not completely cold-shoulder, and struggle with "I cant save/help anyone.". They join the Splatoon to help Cuttlefish, since the whole mission goes well and they defeat Octavio, it gives them a boost in confidence, not a lot and they are relatively quiet about it. They finally felt useful for once.

Al (Phyto at the time) isnt a soldier, she is a mechanic. While not strictly working with the government/military, she is called in to work for them pretty regularly for stuff like weapon and tech repairs. Another job he does is Zapfish care, pretty self explanatory, he does weekly checks with the zapfish.

The first time these two interact is during the Splatoon 1 storymode. Al only recently started hearing rumors about an inkling running around and taking the zapfish, at first he brushes it off. It's not until she goes to do her zapfish checks does she find out that it is in fact true and she runs into 3. Al does try to defend the bulb where the zapfish is, but not being as skilled in combat as 3, he does not come out victorious and the zapfish is taken away.

After that, everytime that Al goes to check on the fish, all the bulbs are shattered and empty. (Except for one that she finds, that's where her funny looking little zapfish comes from. Its name is 1202.)

Fast forward to the arc of OE.

Al had been planning to leave the domes for a while (about 2 years) and finally she had a plan; take the abandoned underground train tracks that Al discovered a while ago far enough. (how the gang end up in the deepsea metro is never explained so we're going with this.) Unfortunately for them this is the area 3 and Cuttlefish are surveying/exploring and that also leads into the deep sea. They dont get into a fight (Per Al's signal) and instead they somewhat travel together until they reach kamabo co.'s territory where in then security gets them.

Cuttlefish and 3 aren't deemed useful/worthy so they are just taken to one of the abandoned platform stations, Al on the other hand is taken to be sanitized. The process begins but near completion, it is interrupted by 3 taking an unconscious, nearing death Al and hauling him back to the safe spot is with Cuttlefish and 1202.

I have a bunch of headcanons for how this primordial ooze works but to put it simply, since the sanitization process was not complete for Al, it leaves her in very critical condition. Getting back to Cuttlefish now, Al is basically gone, no response from him, no breathing, no pluse, no nothing and his digits are going white (if you dont know, when inkfish die, they turn completely white/translucent. I like to also think that Splatoon inkfish, after a short amount of time after death, dry up and flake away.). Cuttlefish and 3 cant really be carrying a body around for, multiple reasons and make the decision to leave Al there, off to the side and covered. However, Al's zapfish protests and squirms out of Cuttlefishs hold and rushes over to Al thinking Al is just sleeping. Normally 1202 would wake Al up by jumping on him or tugging at him, and if all else doesn't work, even if 1202 can produce little electricity if any at all, it would shock Al. After a few tries, the shocking works and Al is back, however now about 90% sanitized; having no memories except for only remembering 1202, which he then proceeds to carry around everywhere. It is worth to note that Al cannot speak during the OE arc, and he communicates through different means.

Instead of being who knows where in the canon storymode, Char actually stays with Cuttlefish and Al on the train up until 3/4 of the way through where Cuttlefish tasks them with finding an alternative route incase Al's mission and the telephones promise dont work.

A bunch of stuff happens on the train like;

- Char, while technically saving Al, feels really guilty for her state

- Being sanitized, Al does not experience pain and pair that with her inexperience, leads to her being pretty careless when doing tests and comes back the the train with injuries almost everytime. Char starts to get a little worried, even though the wounds heal very fast. They proceed to start pulling Al off to the side after stations and bandaging her up.

- With the mem cakes, Al does recover their memories. He tries to explain to Cuttlefish, Char and sometimes Isopadre by using the mem cakes, the best way I can describe it is like Al playing with the mem cakes like toys to tell a story.

- Al had 2 friends down in the domes, Aurora (Octoling soldier) and Skip (a failed DJ Octavio clone; Octotrooper)

I dont have a design for Aurora but I do for Skip!

Continuing on, Al has mem cakes of these two friends of his and when Char heads out to proceed to find a different route, he gives the mem cakes over to Char. Why? Just incase, Al knows they may have gone looking for him (this does turn out to be true).

Anyways, skipping ahead (I'm skipping Char's mindcontrol phase cause there is some stuff from that chapter that havent shared and want to keep for myself for a little while longer :)) after the defeat of the NILS statue, Al almost dies again from overexertion, both her and Char do go to the hospital. Char is omitted from the hospital sooner than Al due to Al's critical condition and it is atleast a month or so later that Al is finally sent home.

I'm waiting to see what the deal is with side order before I commit to splat3 storystuff with Al but that's the mostly full story!

Some little fun facts

- Sometimes on outings, Al likes to bring along Finch (Agent 4) because he finds them silly. Char is completely okay because Finch kinda just does his own thing.

- Al is decently clingy to Char.

- Both being Aroace (as with most of my characters) their relationship is funny in the way that while they call eachother partner, they are sorta in a way like "oh but we aren't like that, just really good friends." Which in a way that's literally what they are but they dont know the right word it for a very long time.

- Allen has more energy when compared to Char.

Anyways that's it for now :)

[biasbuck]

BiAsBuck’s ficrec Fridays

Happy Friday everyone! Back again with another round of the fic I've been reading this week. You can find previous rec lists here.

A reminder I'm here for all buddie/bucktommy/buddietommy configurations, enough love to go around!

17 May 2024

through the fire and the sound by @kirkaut 'It all starts when Tommy has to cancel their plans for Friday. Or: Evan Buckley and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.' The reason this week's rec list is coming a little later in the day, was because I was absolutely immersed in this 10k one shot and couldn't stop reading! I really loved the Buck characterisation in particular in this one, his voice rang out so strongly, supported, teased and cared for by the 118, and just ready to take those next steps with Tommy. Loved how their relationship was developed and showcased with the depth of love explored. After a series of bad calls end in injury, sometimes you have to embrace the moment!

you’ve got too much to wear on your sleeve by @try-set-me-on-fire apparently I was in the mood for some good ol' hurt/comfort this week, because in this one Tommy’s helicopter goes down, and whilst Maddie reassures Buck he'll be ok, in an effort to distract himself from worrying on the job, Buck concentrates on fixing the station AC unit. I really enjoyed the structure of this one, how Buck's work continues even once he knows what's happened because he still has a shift, and Tommy sending Maddie updates to reassure Buck was just very sweet.

prescribed burn and aerial ignition by @wakeupnew is a brilliantly crafted 7x06 coda, in which 'Tommy's busy fighting a wildfire at the edge of the Angeles National Forest, but every time he checks his phone, he has an increasingly unbelievable series of text messages.' I LOVED the text messages added in to this fic, such a great mix of sweet and drunken and funny and charming and appropriately alarming. Continuing the trend of them showing concern for each other, I also just loved Tommy's appreciation of clipboard Buck, drunk Buck, worried brother-in-law Buck and safe in his arms Buck. And the follow up is a beautifully soft and sexy morning after epilogue.

give your heart and soul to charity by @exhuastedpigeon is a buddie fic with background 'keeping things fluid' bucktommy, and crucially in which 'Eddie dumps God, gets some more therapy, accepts parts of himself he was taught to hate, loves his best friend, and loves himself.' With gorgeous evocative writing, lots and lots of Eddie introspection and some very pleasing healing Catholic Guilt to joyful unrepression arc, there's emotional ups and downs along the way that made my heart ache.

To Build a Home We Deconstruct Our Rituals by @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels was another buddie fic I was recommended from a few years ago to read to get inside Eddie's head and is my favourite of tropes - fake marriage of convenience with co-habitation and mutual pining and very real feelings they've yet to articulate. Post-shooting, Eddie has concerns about the legal strength of Buck being Christopher's guardian in case of his death...so he totally marries him about it. My favourite thing was just nobody really batting an eye, until it became undeniable. And Maddie's reaction.

i could be the one (or your new addiction) by @bucktheally 'Five times Buck had to put a dollar in the Mentioning Tommy jar during 7x07, and one time nobody was around to catch him.' 118 firefam team banter my beloved!! As fun as this season has been I am MISSING ME some firetruck team conversations allowed by a longer season, and this fic fills the void magnificently.

PS - once again sending out the signal to ask if you have any henren authors/fic recs I should check out PLEASE let me know! I love them!

Also it's my birthday tomorrow and you know you want to point me towards any of your buddietommy fics that I missed!

[transingthoseformers]

It is a Prowl Day, so I feel like I should mention him in Propagate. I mentioned briefly that he is also carrying and in denial. Basically, most things follow Canon, but Prowl after the Tyrest Incident when he almost died and wasn't found by the Autobots sought to comfort and comfort from them. It ended with him carrying, which he didn't think was possible due to how CCs were constructed given how rare it was with a governmentally steralized species.

He isn't fully aware of it, just experiencing a lot of high stress needs to den and avoid thos ehe doesn't trust behaviors and even more wary of others.

The Dark Cybertron Arc occurs, and Megatron's Trial, but when Optimus invites him, Prowl declines. He has genuinely lost trust in Optimus in a lot of ways and is noting his instability, and his entire body screams DANGER, though he isn't consciously recognizing it.

Now Cybertron has to deal with an increasingly shut in devstated Prowl who is convinced he's dying while the Constructicons are trying to figure out a delicate way to get him to admit the obvious (to them) because the Carrier is the one who announces it culturally and him not doing it yet is semi rejecting them so they are trying to prove their worth and get him to acknowledge them. He's giving them mixed signals as he is responding well to things, but then catches himself. He blames his instinct to trust them on the gestalt bond and it upsets him more.

Society takes a sharp left turn when Phase Seven is announced, and there is a confusing reaction (for those not in the know) from the Decepticon Populace who, accept this as the reason Megatron went Autobot and immediately start being more actively courting Autobots and Neutrals. Even more its working and everyone is dealing with a baby boom.

Tarantulas eventually still happens and kidnaps Prowl, forcing him to accept what is really happening. Due to changes though the Constructicons are the ones who come running and Prowl hesitates when Tarantulas asks and is emotionally compromised enough to admit Ostaros/Springer lived and he has been keeping an eye on him since. This changes the direction of this conversation and when Arcee and the Wreckers and Kup (who got pinged by panicking Sires) arrives Prowl gives it away and there is a whole messy family reunion and everything takes on very different tones with Verity just judging the entire time. The Constructicons are bristling and holding Prowl who accepts it and very quietly informs them he is carrying and they are over the moon.

Prowl cannot make himself go back to Cybertron and Starscream's rule, and the Constructicons don't blame him. He considers going to Earth but sees Optimus decide annexing it is a sane reaction and turns away. They head towards Luna-1 because Prowl is still needing to eliminaye threats and he leaves Tarantulas a contact and does not order he be eliminated not that it would work.

On the way a situation occurs and Prowl gets separated from the Constructicons who are freaking out and runs into the Scavengers who end up delaing with him giving birth while being attacked by slavers who want to sell the baby Cybertronians. Grimlock and Spinister help him with Grimlock specifically carefully carrying one, the future Grimlock II, back to Prowl.

He names them afterwards.

Sentinel happens with the addition of the Constructicons and commentary on Prowl’s "abominations" (babies) and Prowl dens down on Luna-1 making awkward friends with the Moon Husbands who think he is just enough of a sad sack to pity and is covered in children.

Tarantulas eventually ends up calling up Prowl instead of Overlord and they reminisce and Prowl thinks up a reciprocity since Mesothulas didn't get to raise a child Prowl should give him one so he attempts to seduce and babytrap Tarantulas who sort of bluescreens about it. Fort Max is the one who sits Prowl down and goes hey body please use words after the third time he catches Prowl in the closet with the "spider monster" that Red Alert warned them about and Prowl explains the logic. Fortress Maximus has become that friend who helps Prowl be less an asshole and articulate his feelings and forces him to verbalize them.

He, Tarantulas, and the Constructicons discuss their future and plans and the Constructicons explain yeah they love Prowl and he's Gestalt and theirs but they can tell he has some weird complicated feelings he needs to resolve and they are fine with the spiderbot and appreciate the warning because they've been having some weird sex dreams lately.

Blackarachnia happens by the time anyone finally realizes where the "missing" Prowl ended up.

Of course he's carrying and in denial about it yep yep, typical Prowl move

yk Prowl under more stress is probably something nobody needs, goddamn he's gotta be terrifying

A lack of Prowl at the trial has gotta lead to interesting consequences! Makes sense he lost trust in Optimus, Prowl isn't doing so well

So Prowl's losing it and the constructicons are trying to help but they kiiinda don't know what to do, makes sense the gestalt bond would register them as safe™️

I cannot properly explain the sheer sound I made when I read "when phase seven was announced"

My godddd is that gonna cause fun results because all the other phases were rather unpleasant, but this part? Oh dear Primus is this gonna cause so many funny interactions between decepticons who Know and the autobots and neutrals who Do Not Know. Megatron did not intend on this when defecting, but ykw it could've been worse. It could have been worse. I mean, this definitely changes how mecha are gonna see the moderately confused Megatron and the far too elated Tarn. Tarn, such a force for horribleness, endorsing creation.

Ooo on the Tarantulas event still happening and him immediately noticing Prowl is carrying and well Tara Mc No Filter is definitely gonna bring it up. Makes sense in this case the constructicons are the ones coming for him this time, which has gotta cause interesting results.

FAMILY REUNION TIME

Verity is judging so much

So so much

Prowl: fine I'm pregnant

Verity, who has eyes and can see this: nice to see you've caught up with the rest of us

So Cybertron is a no go, Earth is a no go, so off to Luna-1 they go time to have some babies on the moon. Moon babies yet again

[this action will have consequences later on]

THEVAFVKJXX

THE SCAVS

So the scavs 100% help, Prowl babies love being born at the exact wrong time don't they. Aw on Grimlock with just a tiny little constructiprowl sparkling.

SENTINEL YOU ASSHOLE, YES

The moon husbands have several opinions about this but those opinions are somewhat in the positive, "nice to see someone loves Prowl, must be lonely to be the only ones" just.

A sad sack of pity and covered in children

oh Prowl.

Tara:

Tara: ykw I'm gonna try the whole parenthood thing again and Prowl did give me his number after all

Poor Red Alert, he probably thought he was losing it again but nope nope it's real, the "spider monster" is real babygirl and don't worry destruction is the opposite of what's on his mind right now

I like to think Fort Max gave them the most tired stare after catching Tara and Prowl. Just. MN YES, HE'S NOT SO SURE THINGS ARE SUPPOSED TO BEND LIKE THAT. The idea of Fortress Maximus actually helping Prowl be a better person is amazing, because fuck knows someone's gotta do it.

They do honestly need to have a thorough, thorough talk, and I like to think the moon husbands are lightly but consistently pushing them to talk about figuring stuff out. This actually brings up cool things regarding how being in a gestalt affects having a non gestalt partner, I'm stashing this away for Broadwings Universe KOBD and Stunticons reasons.

And all of this went down while only two large handfuls of people knew where Prowl was