#though i have encountered pure poetry in there before

[dioynsus]

listen i like this artist’s music but i just feel like announcing ur trust funded existence in ur spotify bio is a bit obnoxious even if you want to…pull back the veil? pre-empt critique? idek

[homunculus-argument]

Intelligence is a nebulous concept that can't be perfectly and exactly measured in numbers or other metrics, but there are things people generally agree as signs of at least some intellect. An ability to learn and employ new knowledge, adapting to new information, being able to notice patterns and correlations between seemingly unrelated things. Being able to adjust one's methods as needed, ability to make deductions and educated guesses based on incomplete data, being able to improvise if necessary.

And look. Don't get me wrong here. But I learned to read on my own when I was five, I literally have no memories of ever not knowing how to read. English is not my first language, I cannot officially call myself bilingual because neither of my parents was a native english speaker. I first picked it up by hearing it on TV. I could already read and speak english when I went into school, and for the rest of it I managed to get decent enough grades purely by improvising that nobody noticed that I literally never did my homework ever before I was 11. Nobody noticed that I have an attention deficit disorder before I was 27.

I learned to play the clarinet, the piano at some point, and though I lost my voice, I used to sing. If you gave me an instrument and played me a tune, I could repeat it playing by the ear. I could even write it down, note by note, if I heard it a few times and remembered it. If you gave me notes of a song I've never heard, I could whistle it from the notes.

I learned enough swedish in school to read the back of a shampoo bottle, but still enough to compare and contrast the nuance differences in the finnish, swedish and english translations of the same notifications at bus stops. I can summarise what is the unifying element between a long list of words with the same prefix or suffix, and name their mutual definition. I remember enough of the french I learned in school and spanish I learned on my own to roughly parse together portugese.

My parents met in university, but while I never made it to college, I've still made myself a career in something I never went to school for. I have no higher education in arts past high school art classes. I am a full-time professional in something I taught myself, working with a script I also wrote myself without any guidance past brief googling.

That being said, I can't read an analog clock. I've learned how to do a lot of things in my life, but that's the one thing I can't fucking do. You can show me a clock face and I won't know what it means. If I can't look at my phone and there's nothing with a digital clock available, I've learned tricks on how to get people to tell me the time without admitting that I can't read it. Like asking someone if they think the clock on the wall is on time, prompting them to look at their own clock and tell me what their clock says. Pointedly looking at the clock and remarking to people that We Have Plenty Of Time, and assessing from their reactions whether that is true or if I was sarcastic. I never learned to read a clock face, but I've learned plenty of ways to get people to read it to me.

And every single time I tell people I can't read a clock face, they start trying to explain it to me. Like look. I'm 29. You do not know any method to explain it that I would never have encountered in the past 20 years. None of them sunk. I've tried until I cried and I still can't do it. I could learn to translate poetry from french, how to put together a car engine, or how to skin a llama, but that is the one thing I cannot do. I do not know what the positions of the arrows pointing at numbers mean, and you can't make me.

[mimisempai]

What your words mean to me

Summary

Wandering through the bookshop's shelves, Aziraphale would never have expected to come across a book belonging to Crowley, let alone a poem written in his demon's own hand...

Notes

When you let your heart speak, it's always poetry.

Day 29 : Poetry

On Ao3

Rating G -  1023 words

As the last note faded, Aziraphale rose from his chair to turn off the gramophone. 

While waiting for Crowley to return from his session at the planetarium, he wandered among the shelves of the bookshop, looking for something to read, when his eyes were suddenly drawn to a book that didn't look familiar. 

He approached it and took a closer look at what was written on the spine.

The Internal Constitution of the Stars by Arthur S. Eddington. 

Now he understood why this book was unknown to him - it belonged to Crowley. The angel was delighted to see that the demon was finally beginning to take possession of this part of the bookstore as well. 

Curious, he cautiously pulled the volume toward him, but as he lifted it, he was surprised to see a sheet of paper fly off and fall to the floor.

He picked it up and noticed that it was in Crowley's handwriting.

The sheet appeared to have been crumpled and then uncrumpled, and several sentences had been crossed out.

Not feeling entitled to read something that seemed personal, Aziraphale was about to put it back in the book when his eyes were drawn to a word.

Angel.

He hesitated for a few seconds, but even though he was an angel, his curiosity finally got the better of him.

With Crowley's book and the sheet of paper in his hands, Aziraphale sat down at his desk to read what the demon had written.

He placed the paper in front of him, put on his glasses, and began to read.

The angel couldn't help but giggle as he read the title of what appeared to be a poem.

Ode to my Angel

My sweet angel, my inspiration.

How I love the way you came into my life like a revelation

Invading my heart and mind, day and night,

Every encounters, of my life the highlight

 When you walk away from me, I only think of our next encounter

That I would finally be able to show you I can be better

That I can finally read in your eyes pride and admiration

And forget that one day I could have been a deception

 I can't list all the reasons I have for loving you

Your kind eyes and your sweet smile that are always so true

Your sharp mind and your good heart that you let me see

I could go on, but my words are poor to describe what you are to me

Crowley had scribbled a few words at the end of the poem that made Aziraphale laugh out loud. 

Okay, poetry is not for me. Let's keep this piece of shit paper here to remind me never to try to write poetry again. 

My words are just that, too poor. 

Besides, I'm writing this to someone who's had a bookshop for centuries and has read verses by every talented poet who's ever lived.

Reflecting on the poem, Aziraphale thought that maybe Crowley was not a poet, but the meaning of the words was pure poetry. Perhaps his words were poor and his rhymes shaky, but the emotions behind them were the most beautiful lines the angel had ever read. He couldn't help but be moved by the thought of being the one who had inspired Crowley to write that poem, and even more by discovering the depth of the demon's feelings. He knew them, but to read it in black and white was something else.

He read it again, slowly, trying to memorize every word. Concentrating on his reading, he didn't hear the bookshop door open and close, and it was only when Crowley gasped behind him that he noticed his presence and looked up from his desk.

Crowley murmured, "You found it..."

Aziraphale turned to him and sheepishly replied, "I'm sorry, Crowley, I didn't mean to... I was going to put it back in the book, but when I saw the word Angel, I couldn't help myself. "

Crowley smiled softly and walked over to the Angel leaning against the desk before taking the sheet of paper in his hands. He said softly, "Don't apologize, Angel. If I didn't want you to find it, I wouldn't have left it there, you know."

He pressed a light kiss to Aziraphale's lips and added, pointing to the poem, "And after all, it's nothing you don't know. So you can throw it away."

Aziraphale shook his head and briskly took the sheet from Crowley's hands, placed it on the desk, and said, "No way am I throwing this away.

The angel stood and took the demon's hands in his own before saying quietly, "Yes, I knew most of what you wrote, but I'd like to come back to something in particular. Something I don't quite agree with." 

Crowley looked at him quizzically and Aziraphale continued, "When you wrote that you wish you can finally read pride and admiration in my eyes, to forget that you were once a disappointment. I don't know when you wrote that, but I hope you know by now that you have never been a disappointment and that my pride and admiration have long been yours."

Crowley smiled and nodded slowly before replying, "I wrote it shortly after the Metatron episode, when I really didn't know what to do with myself. But I assure you, Angel, you should throw that away."

Aziraphale placed a finger on the demon's lips and shook his head before saying quietly, "As I've already told you. There's no way I'm throwing it away."

Aziraphale brought Crowley's hands to his lips and kissed slowly each palm before continuing, "What you've written, your words, what they mean, is more precious than the most valuable book in this bookshop." 

He wrapped his arms around the demon's neck and drew his face to his own before saying softly, "Your love, what you feel for me, I see it every day in your eyes, in your gestures, I feel it in every kiss, in every caress, and that, my lovely demon..."

Aziraphale paused, kissed Crowley tenderly on the lips, and continued, "This is the most exquisite poetry."

_________

Still not beta'd

Still not my native language

Still hoping you'll enjoy this story  🥰

Still thanking you for bearing with me 😝

Ineffable Growing Love series : here (After season 2)

Ineffable Husbands masterlist : here (Before season 2)

[tarrenterror25]

thoughts no one asked for but my mind has no mouth and must scream

This is purely self indulgent.

Alfred Pennyworth (Batman 2022) x Soft/Romantic Goth F!Reader

Rating: E

Word Count: 2.3K

Tags: established relationship, smut, PinV, fluff, mention of death/the macabre, body worship, petit/short reader, smidgen of brat behavior

Song referenced in moodboard is “For You” by HIM and song mentioned in blurb is “Until Eternity” by Blackbriar (Orchestral Version).

The two of you met through a chance encounter and it grew from there. At first, Alfred wasn’t sure what to think of your eclectic style, but your personality was so endearing that he was drawn to you. There was something humorous to him about your dark style with the contrast of your welcoming and almost bubbly personality.

You’re surprisingly shy and he can’t help, but say bold and sweet things that elicit a response from you like you trying to hide your smile behind your hands or turning away from him. Honestly, whatever comes out of his mouth, he’s just as surprised as you are!

“Are you always this brave when you flirt?” you ask.

“Only seems to be when I’m around you,” he replies.

Eventually he worked up the nerve to ask you on a date and then another one and another. He found himself falling more in love with you with each passing day.

Before Alfred says goodbye to you at your doorstep, he takes your hand in his. He had been nervous the whole night, but was ready to confess his love in a way that’s special to you. He was quick to learn your fondness for poetry and he’s no poet, but he wants to show you he is sincere.

“The night has a thousand eyes and the day but one,” he recites. “Yet the light of the bright world dies with the dying sun.”

The two of you are closer now, hardly any space between you as you look up into his eyes, hanging on his every word.

“The mind has a thousand eyes and the heart but one,” he continues. “Yet the light of a whole life dies-”

“When love is done,” you finish softly.

Alfred smiles. “My time with you has been some of the best moments of my life thus far,” he says. “I find myself thinking of you always and have come to realize that should our time come to an end, I would be quite miserable. Because I love you, dearly.”

Your lace gloved hand comes up to caress his cheek and he leans into your touch. “There are darknesses in life and there are lights,” you say to him. “And you are one of the lights, the light of all lights. I love you, too, Alfred.”

Your macabre interests are fascinating to him. There’s something magnetic about how you find beauty in the darkest of things. He’s not too put off by the decor in your home; the Wayne home has some rather dark decor as well so skulls and candles are not too out of the ordinary for him.

The two of you bond over books; exchanging titles is a love language between the both of you. He does blush a bit at some of the romance ones you hand him that have smuttier scenes and he’s smitten at how interested you are in his picks for you. Often the two of you just snuggle close to each other reading your own books or reading a book together.

Your music taste is your own, though. He appreciates it, really, but it’s not his thing. Artists like HIM, Apocalyptica, or Blackbriar he finds some enjoyment in and loves to dance with you to their songs. If you play more orchestral versions of songs you like, he’s very into these; brings out the melodies a lot more in his opinion.

A beautiful and haunting voice sings about a love through time. Alfred finds you swaying and singing to the music and holds out his arms to join you.

I loved you once I loved you twice I loved you in my previous lives I know your voice, I know your eyes You haunt me through my dreams at night

Your hand rests in his and his other hand is on the small of your back, holding you close, his eyes taking all of your beauty in. He gives you a spin and pulls you back to him. You didn’t know much about dancing before him and he enjoys teaching you. He loves seeing how happy it makes you that he indulges you in dancing to your music.

Oh, my love, we’ll meet again We always do in the end Our two souls destined to be You and I until eternity

Oh, the way you look at him, with such love and adoration. It melts him from the inside out. You are a romantic and you make him feel things he wasn’t sure he was capable of feeling anymore. The way you love is something out of a novel. It’s something only seen in dreams and heard of in songs like these.

We live on and on and on Death is weak and we are strong On and on and on Time is weak and we are strong

“I’m very lucky to have you, Alfred,” you say as he expertly twirls you, his arm coming over you, spinning you outward and then pulling you back to him.

“It’s quite the opposite, darling,” he says before slowly dipping you so that your head falls back and your neck is exposed to him. You let your arms slowly descend as your body drapes over his arm. His free hand comes up to caress your neck, his thumb brushing across your throat right under your chin. “I’m the lucky one,” he says moving his hand to cradle the back of your head and to guide you back up so he can kiss you.

I loved you once I loved you twice I loved you in my previous lives And when I die just keep in mind I’ll love you in another life

Despite different tastes in music for the majority, you do share a love of opera and classical music. Alfred enjoys taking you to the opera, theatre, or to the music hall for a concert. Other dates include places like the museum, both art and history. You have shown him many new things he either didn’t know or never noticed before. Your favorite date, that Alfred has also become quite fond of, is afternoon picnics in the park. The prim and proper butler was hesitant at first, but soon became more relaxed with the idea. Of course, you have a black picnic basket complete with all kinds of morsels inside. You retrieve two gothic goblets and he smiles; you are unabashedly you through and through and he loves it.

In his time knowing you before you started dating, your more revealing or accentuating wardrobe definitely had him blushing, but now that you’re his, oh, it still flusters him, but now he doesn’t feel so bad about looking. He adores your fashion sense; there’s an air of elegance to it while still reflecting your bright personality. You are shorter than he is and sometimes your shoes make you a little taller than him, but he doesn’t mind it at all. He just smiles, feeling proud of you for dressing in what makes you feel beautiful.

Alfred loves how you dote on him, always complimenting him on what a gentleman he is or how sweet and polite he is. It makes his chest swell with pride and inspires him. He loves how you help with little things like helping put on his tie; his eyes watch your black nails gently situate it properly on his neck and adjust his collar and you help him put on a coat or jacket and smooth it out.

His favorite gift from you is the cane you got him. The handle is a silver knob with a bat etched onto it. It’s so thoughtful to him and he uses it all the time now.

The first time the two of you are intimate, Alfred is taken back by what you’ve worn for the occasion; all the ribbons and lace decorating your body have him filled to the brim with desire. Despite how your choice of attire is dark in color, it is soft and demure in nature. He’s soft and gentle with you, but will take on a more dominant attitude if you ask for it. He loves you riding on top of him with your lingerie in full view. It’s too beautiful on you for him to ask you to take it off. He loves running his hands over your stocking clad thighs and watching how the fabric pulls and stretches across your body as you bounce on him.

He has you underneath him. He holds onto one of your thighs wrapped around him, using his grip to help him drive deeper into you. The soft mewls and whines you make are music to his ears. He’s thrusting slowly into you, his forehead pressed against yours and his eyes shut as he tries to focus on not just pounding you mercilessly.

“It’s so difficult to not lose control, love,” he says with a shaky breath. “You don’t know what you do to me.”

With his face held in between your hands, you utter a wish from your black painted lips for him to let go and to fuck you.

Who is he to deny you? He’d gladly do anything you ask of him.

He sits up and bends your knees as far as can towards you head and fucks you harder, deeper, and faster until you can’t form a coherent thought and you’re a mewling mess beneath him.

Alfred has a hard time actually keeping his hands off of you; he loves holding your hand, having your arm looped in his, his arm around your waist, or his hand resting on your thigh. He just wants you close to him at all times and loves showing you off as his. He’s not at all bothered by the stark contrast of you and him together.

Sometimes he does want to be handsy in other ways, especially when you tease by bending over further than necessary or brushing up against him. He’ll return the favor once the two of you are alone.

In the car, you lied about needing something from the backseat and proceeded to twist your body to reach a thing that he’s sure you made up as an excuse to put your ass on display for him. Your dress riding up and nearly exposing your backside. He quickly grabs the hem of your dress and holds it down to honor your modesty.

“Darling,” he says, “surely this can wait?”

“I’m sure I left it back here,” you call out.

As you shuffle through some things in the backseat, he’s very aware of how close his hand is to your clothed sex and occasionally you keep pushing back onto his hand making him brush up against it. And then inside of your place, you kept brushing against him, your chest against his front or your backside against the front of his pants. He knows what you’re doing, he can tell by the way you bite your black painted lip and the way you look at him from under those long lashes.

You’re so shy, particularly when it comes to letting him know what you want him to do to you and just as you love riling him up with your actions, he loves putting you on the spot, making you say out loud what you want.

He tips your chin up, thumb brushing your bottom lip. “Use your words, darling,” he says. “What is it you want?”

So when he gets you alone, he returns the favor. He gets you in your room and stops your roaming hands. He gently instructs you to sit on the bed and he kneels in front of you. He makes sure his movements are slow, his fingers barely brushing your skin as they trail down to the little buckles of your heels. He helps remove them and then lets his fingers ghost further up to where your garters hold up your stockings. He undoes these next and slowly peels them off your skin, trailing kisses along your thighs and legs. He glances up at you, watching how you squirm under his touch.

“Stand up, darling, and turn around,” he says softly.

He’s kissing your neck and shoulders as he undoes the laces of your corset. Your back arching and your head tossing back to rest on his shoulder begging for him to hurry up and touch you.

“Be patient, darling,” he says. “I want to savor you.”

Once you’re completely undressed and with him still fully clothed, he’s worshipping your body; planting slow and soft kisses everywhere while his hands caress your flesh. It’s a slow build before he’s finally inside you, but he makes it worth the wait.

Alfred is extremely protective of you while the two of you are out and about. He knows your style of dress isn’t widely accepted and sometimes the looks you get from people get to you. He’ll soothe you as best as he can to help you feel better.

“You look wonderful, darling.” “Would you like to borrow my coat?” “It’s perfectly alright if you wish to go back home, I don’t mind.”

If you go out by yourself, he’s just as protective, but does his best to not be overbearing. Sometimes you like to go out dancing to places, that he admits, just aren’t for someone like him; places like the Iceberg Lounge or Gotham City Olympus. He only asks that you send a text upon your arrival and departure from your destination. He also implores you to not hesitate to contact him if you need anything.

Sometimes he’s the one who gets self conscious. The thought that you might like someone more like you does creep into his mind at times. But then he remembers that not once have you tried to change him, you love him as he is.

“Sometimes I do wonder if perhaps someone with interests closer to yours might be more suitable for you,” he says.

“I’m interested in you, Alfred,” you say before kissing him.

You are definitely an unexpected surprise in his life, but he wouldn’t trade you for anything.

[spaceat6pm]

i said “i love you more” and you disagreed with me as if it were such an impossible feat. you laughed and smiled and said “i don’t think thats true”. i didn’t argue, i just let the feeling of knowing i was right dwindle to the back of my mind. maybe this time, for once, maybe he did love me more.

a few rainy weeks later, my sunshine woke me up, as did the sun-shining. you told me you no longer saw a future where our love could succeed.

its a funny thing, to have encountered a love so genuine and pure.

a love that knocks down walls that you built to be impenetrable. a love that makes you realise you’re capable of loving again; a love that makes you entirely unselfish towards them; a love where you would put anything aside to ensure their happiness; a wholesome love that shows you what its like to be truly cared for, for them to do things entirely out of love, without counting favours; a love that sets your soul on fire and makes you feel so alive yet so at peace; a love where it feels as though part of you is missing whenever they arent around.

only for it to be ripped from you without any warning signs; no flashing sirens screaming “hey! this action will lead to dire situations”. the night before we were planning and romanticising about how we were going to live together, in one short night you woke up and decided i was no longer worthy for you.

i told you i hadn’t written in a year or so, because i lost my passion for poetry. it seems all i needed was for you to break my heart for it to flow out of me.

[minwoo-ia]

🔴 The pleasure is mine {Shiloh&Minwoo}

It was time for Shiloh to explore, to discover all the little wonders his new home had to offer, and so, drawn in by the neon sign reading Demonic Pleasures in a bright red, the angel walked in, curious about the pleasures of the local demon population. As he walked across the club, he couldn't help but arch an eyebrow upon witnessing a rather peculiar scene, since text books and stationery were the last things he'd assume would be present in such a place. Maybe they even had poetry clubs around, he thought as a small, amused smile formed in the corner of his lips.

And then he felt it — the scent that inundated his nostrils was unmistakable, he could recognize it from miles away. Smacking his lips, Shiloh turned on his heels, blue hues meeting the red pair, their intense gaze. They were nothing like the small, petty spirits he'd encounter at the aerial tolls; their energy was overwhelming, suffocating almost. "Hmm," As he hummed, his eyes scanned the area, "I wouldn't say no to a drink, but something tells me the house doesn't go alcohol-free."  

The gold swirling in the red orbs danced around for a moment as he saw the holy creature enter his establishment. His eyes soft as he recognized the creature as soon as he stepped into the light of the bar. he did not speak of it though- perhaps there was a slight inkling of recognition in his gaze before he hid it again. He knew he had seen the other before but in the Heavenly Kingdom where he had never been.

Oh, how he had liked to forget the past where he had taken the memories of an angel fallen- for he needed to store his memories in a safe space. Where to better hide an Angel’s treasure than within a demon? He had given the memories back though he did not need to say goodbye to them. He never wanted to leave those beautiful memories behind. For he was in love with the Demonic realm where he gazed upon Hell but he was seduced by Heaven- a lover he could never have. He had seen angels dance and the cherubs sing under the endless sunlight. The lightness that came with a realm so odd and foreign to a demon. Yet it’s melodies would play in the background of his dreams sometimes.

How silly for an Arch-demon to dream of Heaven.

He had seen the other there, he heard whispers that the other would fall- and yet it seemed he had not fallen for he was here and his energy felt pure. Making his skin tingle and his mouth water as he watched the other and then smiled. Tilting his head slightly as his horns- black with golden tips -hit the light and reflected the red tones of the led-wall writings. “Hello there, why do you think we do not have anything alcohol-free?” he asked and then handed the other an iPad that had a whole non-alcohol section. Sure, it included blood as well (human and fae) but it also had coke, Fanta and some sparkling water with fruity flavours.

“We also have snacks, I like the little fried cheese snacks.” he gestured to the iPad and smiled at the angel. “I’ve never seen you here before. You new or just crossing through town?”

@shiloh-ia

[drjacquescoulardeau]

IS BUDDHIST NIBBANA WORTH A BOY-TO-BOY’S KISS?

Mo Xiang’s third volume of the saga on The Blessing of a Heaven Official is there in front of me and this saga is emanating with so much force that no one can resist the tanha that tells them “Go For It! There is pleasure in it all!” I am sure you want to discover the pleasure there is in these volumes, but remember the authoress is a woman and as such she develops a sweet, soft, and catching psychology that will turn you completely berserk if you do not keep your feet well anchored in the earth.

The King Ghost Hua Cheng from Ghost City is behind every move the ascended Xie Lian is inspiring or is inspired by and for. His meeting this Xie Lian after 800 years of supernatural and surreal life in our vast cosmos was so mind-stirring, intelligence-moving, and body-inspiring that the pure ascetic Buddhist he is supposed to be, nearly fell into the cauldron of eroticism. He managed not to fall, but that was very close this time since he was unconscious and Hua Cheng took advantage of the situation and pretended that he had to save his “friend” before he drowned, though Hua Cheng knew perfectly well Xie Lian could not drown, hence cannot die. But, well, Hua Cheng kissed Xie Lian unconscious as he was, I mean in his unconscious mind, because Xie Lian was unconscious, and thus he could kiss him since he could not protest. What a twisted and I guess tortured mind he is. He should try Buddhist meditation to hypnotize himself into plain decent abstinence.

But sure enough, the encounter with the Venerable of Empty Words promises to be a fair adventure in which Xie Lian’s mind and body will be chastised, abused, and even probably raped. There will be quite a lot of repair work to do on the psyche and the conscious rightfulness of our Xie Lian. I guess Hua Cheng will take advantage of such situations to steal a couple more kisses. Never trust a ghost because they have no soul anymore and they have no honor either. So, lying, pretending, and even impersonating what they are not to seduce their gullible victims is some kind of sport for these fuzzy beings, if they can really BE.

Enormous sagas, like this one, are no longer a standard form of literature in the West, apart from Stephen King and Anne Rice. But the Chinese have always practiced it and the new generation of writers in China are entirely committed to enormous works of literature in many different genres and styles. Soon these authors are going to hit the screens and not in stories for children like the Japanese adaptation of the Journey to the West.

Éditions La Dondaine, Medium.com, 2024

12 Pages

Buddhism,  *  Poetry,  *  Cultural History Of Ghosts,  *  China,  *  Doctrine of God

[yhwhrulz]

Today's Daily Encounter Thursday, March 23, 2023

No Filter

I will fervently thank the Lord with my mouth; I will praise him in the presence of many.1

Have you ever met a person who, quite literally, speaks everything they are thinking? Whether it be positive or negative, these people have no filter! Throughout this Lenten season, while reading through the Psalms, I have noticed that David was one of these "no filter" types. His Psalms lift praise to the Lord with an array of exaltations; his poetry is truly an inspiration for our own prayers. On his good days, the words of David's psalms have the power to bring us to our knees, lift our hands and worship the Almighty right along with him —but then, there are his bad days. I would not have wanted to be among David's enemies! Just as he used his words to glorify the Lord, he used them to curse his enemies. He prayed, in detail, for the revenge he wished upon those who had wronged him. I remember being taught to pray for our enemies, but Psalm 109 takes that to the next level. It is unclear who had wronged him, but here we find David begging God to punish this person by letting "his children be fatherless and his wife a widow" (V.9), allowing those children to become beggars (v.10) and that no one would show kindness to them (v.12). He even wants to punish this person's parents (v.14)! In verse 20 he says: "Let this be the Lord's payment to my accusers, to those who speak evil against me." The next verse, though, made me laugh: "But you, Lord, my Lord, deal kindly with me for your name's sake; because your faithful love is good, rescue me." Lord, punish them for what they did to me, but be good to me? This wasn't what I was taught at all! I thought we weren't supposed to wish evil on our enemies. But, as I read through these Psalms again, I realize there is a deeper lesson to be learned here; God desires our transparency. God desires for us to be specific with our prayer; "to come boldly before Him" (Heb. 4:16) and, like a child, tell Him everything that we are feeling, good and bad. What a beautiful thought!

That a God, so powerful and so mighty, would allow me to come to Him and just be completely vulnerable and tell Him ALL my feelings without being judged, only loved, and forgiven. David had it right! His lack of filter with the Lord allowed him to have a pure and open relationship with his Heavenly Father. Don't you feel like praying right now?

Suggested Prayer: Most Loving Father, I've always known that you know my heart; that nothing is hidden from you. But to be able to speak aloud, all that is in my heart is a literal weight being lifted from me. I desire a pure and open relationship with you and so, I come to you right now…with no filter…In Jesus' name, Amen.

Psalm 109:30 (CSB).

Today's Encounter was written by: Veronica B.

NOTE: If you would like to accept God's forgiveness for all your sins and His invitation for a full pardon Click on: http://www.actsweb.org/invitation.php. Or if you would like to re-commit your life to Jesus Christ, please click on http://www.actsweb.org/decision.php to note this.

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[merakiui]

I was reading through your tags and you mentioned at some point the kazuscara roommates finding your onlyfans and I think I completely combusted—thus i present to you my brain rot of late: you attend the same school as them but you’re not actually friends, all you know about kazuha is that he’s the friendly regular at the cafe you work at, who makes polite conversation every now and then but otherwise is nothing of note. In reality he’s been stalking you for weeks ever since your first encounter, and is dead set on the idea that you’re this innocent, weak thing that needs to be protected (maybe he stepped in when you had a bad customer and your meek reply helped fester his delusions?). Scara, on the other hand, is only aware of your presence since you’re his favourite cam model that he recently found. (Since he’s a harbinger he’s probs loaded) Weeks of funnelling money towards you cause him to feel this unwarranted possessiveness, believing that since he’s been providing so much in your “relationship” that it’s time you reward him in turn. However, despite the unbridled interest they have toward you neither are aware of each other’s feelings for you— that is, until you happen to run into the both of them heading to your class. While both are known for maintaining their stoic masks, they’re friends for a reason— and instantly can tell the attraction their roommates have towards their own “lover”. After kazuha finds your onlyfans he’s certain that you’ve been coerced and wants to save you, while scara thinks it’s time that he’s stopped letting other plebeians look at his possession—so, despite their initial reservations, come together to form the ideal plan. When you find yourself waking up groggy in a room you don’t recognize, all they can do is look on with glee whilst planning their next course of action with their new belonging. They’re friends after all, and good friends share though, don’t they?

This is v long srry lol you can ignore this ofc!!

AAAH, ANON!! YES!!! <3 I couldn’t resist writing more on this concept. orz They make for such a terrifying pair when they work together!

(cw: yandere, stalking, nsfw, implied kidnapping/drugging, unhealthy behaviors/relationship, delusional thoughts, savior complex, implied violence)

What if Kazuha and Scara were just acquainted with one another and actually became closer through their mutual obsession with you? Yes, they’re roommates and ought to get along because they’re living together but they haven’t exactly clicked yet. They talk every now and then and know little things about each other. Nothing too special. They don’t really hang out outside of their dorm either, what with their class schedules being vastly different. And Kazuha’s always out of the dorm doing who-knows-what. Most of his time is spent at a café, where he’ll write and read and stare at you while you work. On the other hand, Scara prefers to stay inside if he doesn’t have a good reason to go out. He likes his alone time. Although he has enjoyed going to the library every now and then to study.

So maybe they need to find some common ground. Maybe they need a push in the right direction before they get closer.

Kazuha likes to stare. Talking to you is great, but he worries he’ll say too much and then he’ll be a nuisance, or you might not want to talk to him at all since you’re working. But you always regard him with a warm smile, happy to scribble his name on the plastic cup because you remember him. Because you recognize his familiar face and soft, gentle eyes. He’s the one who saved you from that rude customer, after all, and he’s a polite regular. Why wouldn’t you know him? You might look like you can handle those types of situations, but what Kazuha saw that day was something entirely different. You were nervous—so soft-spoken and scared. He absolutely has to protect you from those kinds of people now, doesn’t he?

And he does exactly that. He’s your second pair of eyes—your valiant knight in shining armor—who sees and hears all. Sometimes he goes to the café with the intention to simply watch over you and make sure no one’s bothering you. He can recall one time when a customer was speaking rudely about you because her drink hadn’t been prepared in a ‘timely manner.’ In reality it’s impossible to make a drink within a few seconds, especially when you’re already preoccupied with making another customer’s drink. She must’ve woken up on the wrong side of the bed, or maybe she’s just a hateful person in general. You didn’t deserve to be on the receiving end of such fiery insults, though.

Her eyes just can’t see your perfection and therefore she does not deserve to see out of them.

Kazuha’s willing to wrestle with all of this darkness if it means you’ll stay safe, oblivious, and pure. You’re like a defenseless kitten, unable to protect yourself from the scary world. He writes about you a lot in his journal; you’re his muse—someone who constantly shows up in poems and short paragraphs where he tries to describe what your dream date might be or what type of wedding you’d prefer. Things get darker the deeper you delve into his writings, where you’ll find entries in great detail. Kazuha writes a lot and he doesn’t even mean to. He just has to get all of his thoughts on paper before they abandon him and he’s left with emptiness.

Everything you do is pure; you’re almost an equivalent to a holy being. Your smell is pure. Your body is pure. Your actions are pure. Your smile is pure. Even when you’re on the verge of crying from harsh customers or when you’re turning down a confession, you’re still pure. And Kazuha likes that about you because it’s special. There aren’t many people in his life who are completely pure. He’s been through a lot of rough things and has seen firsthand how impure people can be. It’s only fair that he gets a chance to protect purity itself.

He might have some impurities, but that doesn’t deter him from watching over you. As gentle and unassuming as he is, there are times when even he loses his composure. Not many are privy to these dark emotions of his. His smiles are sharp and venomous and his eyes fill with a gloom so dark it can swallow you whole. You’ll never see this side of him; he won’t allow it. Instead you’re treated to his sweet, calm side, where he feigns perfection in hopes of catching your interest.

As for Scara… He doesn’t really care about Kazuha in the beginning. He’s just someone he has to live with. It’s not a big deal and as long as he doesn’t try to make lots of pointless conversation everything will be okay. He prefers the peace and quiet, considering he’s acquainted with people who are far from peaceful and quiet. Scara’s relieved that Kazuha leaves the dorm so often because it gives him an opportunity to watch his favorite cam star’s most recent video. He’s your most loyal follower—someone who’s paid lots of money just to have access to the highest tier of rewards and such. He even got a private video where you addressed him and moaned out his name with lustful thoughts of him. Having lots of money comes in handy.

When he finds out that you go to the same school as him, he’s a little shocked. He didn’t expect you to be so close. You’re practically within touching distance. If only he knew your schedule. If only you were in one of his classes. It’s really annoying that he only knows your online presence and not who you might be in your personal life. The last thing he’s going to do is consult Childe, that popular athlete who knows literally everyone in the school for whatever reason. Surely he knows you. But he’ll die before he ever asks Childe for a favor.

Scara loves you out of every other cam model because you’re different. You’re not just trying to get fast cash. You’re genuine. You listen to your subscribers and their feedback. You do your best to improve and do even better streams than the previous ones. All of your hard work is overlooked by the other fools who watch your streams, but it isn’t overlooked by him. Scara appreciates your attention to detail and the way you’re able to hook him with your breathless voice alone. You’re very skilled at what you do, so it’s only fair you get paid for it.

But buying your services isn’t enough. It’s not a real relationship, but it certainly feels like it when he buys preferential treatment. Private shows, special requests, odd favors—you do it all because he pays for it. But this relationship isn’t going to be one-sided forever. You’ll have to pay him back in full eventually. Scara likes to think he has patience and that waiting is fine. It gives him more time to plan his next move—to figure out what he should do to finally have you all to himself. So that those private shows he watches through a screen can finally be real.

Scara finds the journal sitting innocently on Kazuha’s bed, its maroon cover and maple leaves pulling at his curiosity. He might not know everything about Kazuha, but he’d recognize this journal anywhere. His roommate almost always has it on his person. Scara wouldn’t be surprised if he slept with it. To say he’s curious would be absolutely correct. He can only wonder what Kazuha writes in that thing. Perhaps it’s just notes for a class. That’s what anyone would think, right?

Scara opens it and flips through the first few pages. They’re normal for the most part. Just a bunch of haikus and other useless scribbles. When he skips over some pages, he starts to find things that are far more interesting than poetry and doodles of cats. He finds the majority of the journal is comprised of information. More specifically, there are facts and other knowledge about you—the cam model he’s been obsessed with ever since he stumbled upon your onlyfans. He reads through as much of the journal as he can and instantly learns so much: your address, your roommate, your workplace, your friends’ names, names of any potential exes. The list goes on and on.

Scara doesn’t have anything against Kazuha. His first impression of him wasn’t anything groundbreaking. He thought he was a pushover at first. But now that he knows what this journal holds… Well, it sheds an entirely new light on his roommate.

Just days before Scara took a peek inside his journal, Kazuha discovers your secret online life. He snoops through Scara’s laptop when he steps out, having left it open and unlocked. He’s just trying to find what could have caught Scara’s interest, as he’s almost always glued to his laptop on specific days at specific times, with his headphones on and his gaze unyielding. He doesn’t intend to find the file of one of your private videos—something that was meant only for Scara’s eyes.

He clicks on the video out of interest. He’s not sure what he was expecting to see, but it definitely wasn’t this. Kazuha sits there and stares at the sight before him. You’re dressed in skimpy lingerie and you’re muttering the dirtiest things while coating your fingers in lube. And your hands are stroking a thick toy and you’re addressing Scara and you’re lining it up to your hole and— He shuts the laptop before it can get even more explicit than it already is. He’s so conflicted, fraught with a betrayal so strong it weighs his heart down.

Why would he have this sort of video on his laptop? Did you give it to him? Did he make you do this? Are you in danger? Are you still pure?

Kazuha can’t kill on campus. It’s way too risky and he’d be one of the first suspects if Scara’s body is found. Besides, it’s not like he has the full story. He doesn’t know whether or not Scara’s done something that’s worthy of death. You could just be in a tight spot. He knows how easily you give in when you’re under pressure. Maybe you’re just doing this because you feel like it’s the only thing you can do. Not to worry; Kazuha will save you before Scara can ruin your purity with his twisted fantasies.

They confront each other when the time feels right. Kazuha struggles to keep a smile plastered to his face for the sake of politeness, while Scara holds in his raging temper so that he can bear some semblance of cooperation. Neither of them is happy to hear that the other went through their stuff, but they force themselves to make up because a more pressing issue is at hand: their connection to you.

Kazuha says he’s your secret admirer. Scara says he’s in a relationship with you. There’s no way you’d ever date someone like Scara—Kazuha knows this for a fact. Yet he falters at the confidence in Scara’s tone. That can’t be the truth, right? Despite this, Kazuha still strikes up an offer: If they work together to get what they both want, they’ll be unstoppable. With Scara’s riches and his influence and Kazuha’s charisma and clever thinking, they can easily get their hands on you. Of course this means they’ll have to share, but it’s not a big deal when they’re already in so deep. They both know the other’s secret; now they’re swearing to keep it in the pursuit of having you all to themselves. And luckily Scara agrees to the deal, but that doesn’t give Kazuha a reason to lower his guard.

However despite how well they work together when it comes to planning the kidnapping and actually executing it, they both have their own reasons for wanting you. Scara wishes to make his relationship with you a reality—to toss aside the screen that once held him back and finally do all of the things he could only do in his dreams. Kazuha seeks to protect your fragile heart, lest you crumble under Scara’s intense way of doing things and cling to him for salvation. You can’t do those sorts of things with Scara; he won’t allow it. Your purity is meant for him and no one else.

But sharing is caring and some have to learn that the hard way. It definitely brings Kazuha and Scara closer together, even if neither of them will admit it. If they look past their desires, they can be friends. And soon enough they’ll have to accept this new friendship if they want to avoid any unnecessary complications.

However there are times when they’ll cooperate in order to do things with you. They’re a packaged deal you can’t get rid of.

[santmat]

The Fall and Rise of the Gnostics: Gnostic Gospels Explored - Spiritual Awakening Radio Podcasts

Discover why these Gnostic Gospels and other writings got purged from the Western world during the Fourth Century. Celebrate the sages of Judaism, Neoplatonism and Pythagoreanism that helped to give birth to all of these amazing spiritual movements of antiquity such as the Essenes, Sethians, Mandaeans, Ebionites (mentioned in the Book of Acts, the Hebrew Christians lead by James the Just -- "Christianity before Paul"), Valentinians, Manichaeans, Cathars, and other groups that once represented "cousin" schools of spirituality that have much in common with living paths of today such as Kabbalah, Sufism, and Sant Mat.

Spiritual Awakening Radio Podcast: The Fall and Rise of the Gnostics: Gnostic Gospels Explored - Listen, Download, Subscribe @ the Podcast Website:

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https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/spiritual-awakening-radio/id1477577384

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https://open.spotify.com/show/5kqOaSDrj630h5ou65JSjE

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https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5saWJzeW4uY29tLzIwNzIzNi9yc3M

& @ Wherever You Subscribe and Follow Podcasts (Apple, Spotify, Google, Amazon, Audible, PodBean, Overcast, i Heart Radio, Podcast Addict, Gaana, CastBox, etc...):

https://linktr.ee/SpiritualAwakeningRadio

Instead of a wafer-thin New Testament at the end of a very long old covenant, how about a huge treasure-trove of New Testament type literature, including poetry, psalms and odes? Some of the twelve surviving codices of the Nag Hammadi or Gnostic Gospels were organized with a curious New Testament-like format of: 1) gospels, followed by, 2) letters or spiritual discourses, and then, 3) books of revelation (heavenly apocalypses). These revelations consist of the visionary or out-of-body encounters by various Saints soul-traveling through several heavenly realms of consciousness. This almost two thousand year old "time capsule", now known as the Nag Hammadi Library, has set in motion a spiritual revolution.

Before the Sufis, in antiquity there were some who were vegetarians, followed a practice of being "initiated into the Mysteries of the Kingdom of the Heavens" by a living teacher, and during their meditation practice repeated several sacred names that correspond to various inner regions. Their goal was to spiritually ascend through several heavenly realms in order to return to the timeless Supreme Being in the highest realm. Some called this Being "The Nameless One". There are references to inner Light and Sound. There are also references to a Kal Niranjan type being, a false god or negative power called "the Demiurge". Several Sant Mat authors have written books about the Gnostics and the parallels between Gnosticism and the Path of the Masters.

One of the Gnostic scriptures called "Pistis Sophia" contains many beautiful hymns and prayers. Though reincarnation is mentioned as a reality, the goal of salvation was to liberate souls from material captivity, reincarnation, the wheel of fate, and go back to God again. Souls were given the ability to mystically travel via the Holy Stream of Light. In Pistis Sophia (the Book of Faith-Wisdom) Christ says, "Seek, all of you, after the Light, so that the power of your soul that is in you may live. Do not cease seeking day or night until you find the mysteries of the Kingdom of Light, which will purify you, make you into pure Light and lead you into the Kingdom of the Light."

In Divine Love, Light and Sound,

James Bean

Sant Mat Satsang Podcasts

Spiritual Awakening Radio

https://www.SpiritualAwakeningRadio.com

#gnostic #gnostics #gnosis #gnosticism #gnosticgospels #mandaean #mandaeans #nasoraeans #manichaeans #pistissophia #gospelofthomas #naghammadilibrary #christianity #newtestamentstudies #apocrypha #newtestamentapocrypha #odesofsolomon #spiritualawakeningradio #jamesbean #podcasts #podcasting #gnosticpodcasts #gnosticradio #spiritualpodcasts #spirituality #meditation #books #scriptures #lostbooksofthebible #innerlightandsound #mystics #mystic #mysticism

[samwisethewitch]

Everything You Need to Know About Pagan Deity

As you’ve probably guessed by now, there are many, many, many different approaches to deity within the wider pagan community. While it would be impossible to summarize all of these different perspectives in a single blog post, this post contains some common themes and best practices that are more or less universal and can be adapted to fit whatever system you choose to work with.

In my Baby Witch Bootcamp series, I talk about the “Four R’s” of working with spiritual beings, including deities: respect, research, reciprocity, and relationship. However, when it comes to gods and goddesses specifically, I think it’s important to include a fifth “R” — receptivity.

If you’re completely new to this kind of work and want to avoid making rookie mistakes and/or pissing off powerful spiritual forces, sticking to the Five R’s of Deity Relationships is a good place to start. The Five R’s are:

Respect. It’s always a good idea to have a healthy respect for the powers you choose to connect with, whether you see those powers as literal gods and goddesses or as archetypes within the collective unconscious (see below). While not every ritual needs to be incredibly formal and structured, you should always conduct yourself with an air of respect and reverence when connecting with deity. There’s no need to humble yourself to the point of cowering before the gods (and in fact, this kind of behavior is a turnoff for many deities), but you should strive to be polite and follow your system’s proper protocol for things like cleansing, offerings, and prayers.

Research. I am of the opinion that you should do serious research into a god or goddess before any attempt to make contact with them. This can be controversial, but in my own experience things seem to go more smoothly when I know what I’m doing. Books are really the way to go for this — the Internet can be useful for connecting with other worshipers and hearing their stories, but it isn’t a good source for nonbiased factual information. I recommend starting with academic sources written by secular experts for a purely historical account that won’t be colored by personal religious experience. Once you have a decent understanding of the basic historical context, look for books by pagan authors who have experience working with this deity. These sources will give you a framework for your own interactions with them.

Reciprocity. As we’ve discussed before, reciprocity is a core value of virtually every pagan tradition. Reciprocity is a mutual positive exchange where all parties benefit in some way, and this quality forms the backbone of all healthy relationships with deity. While we benefit from connecting with the gods, the gods also benefit from our worship. Upholding reciprocity in your relationships with deity means making regular offerings to show your appreciation as well as living in a way that your god or goddess approves of.

Relationship. At the end of the day, connecting with a god or goddess is about creating a healthy, fulfilling relationship. Like any relationship, it takes time and effort to keep the connection alive. The gods are living, thinking, feeling beings just like you and me, though on a much larger scale. Just like you and me, they have likes and dislikes and require certain things from those who want to work closely with them. Try to approach the gods as individuals, and connect with them as you would with another person. This will naturally lead to much more authentic and organic relationships.

Receptivity. To be receptive is to be open and ready to receive whatever comes your way — this is an essential quality for anyone who is serious about connecting with a god or goddess. Connecting with the gods means allowing them a place in your life, whatever they choose to bring with them. It means forming a relationship with them on their terms, and that requires us to give up a certain degree of control. While you should never feel afraid or completely out of control when connecting with deity (if you do, stop contacting that deity immediately), you may very well experience things you did not expect or ask for. Be prepared for these surprises, and understand that when the gods surprise us in this way, they do it in order to help us grow. Let go of any preconceived ideas about what a relationship with this deity “should” look like, and instead let it unfold naturally.

Though there is much more to working with deity than just these values, keeping these values in mind will get you started out on the right foot in your relationships with the gods.

Deity or Archetype?

As odd as it may sound, not everyone who connects with the gods through study and ritual believes those gods to be literal spiritual beings. Some pagans (I would even say the majority of pagans, based on my personal experience) connect with the gods as individuals with their own personalities and agency, but others connect with them as symbols that represent different elements of the human experience. This latter group is working with the gods not as deity, but as archetypes.

The term “archetype” comes from academia, particularly the fields of psychology and literary analysis. An archetype is a symbol that embodies the fundamental characteristics of a person, thing, or experience.

Swiss psychoanalyst Carl Jung argued that archetypes are powerful symbols within the collective unconscious (basically an ancestral memory shared by all of humanity) that arise due to shared experiences across cultures. For example, Jung would argue that Demeter, Juno, and Frigg all represent the “Mother” archetype filtered through different cultural lenses, reflecting the important role of mothers across Greek, Roman, and Old Norse culture. For Jung and his followers, archetypes allow us to connect to latent parts of our own psyche — by connecting with the Mother archetype, for example, you can develop motherly qualities like patience, empathy, and nurturing.

For comparative mythology expert Joseph Campbell, archetypes represented types of characters that appear in some form in most or all global mythology. In his book, The Hero of a Thousand Faces, Campbell identified the “hero’s journey” as the archetypal narrative framework on which most stories, from ancient myths to modern films, are based. (If you’ve taken literally any high school literature class, you’re probably familiar with Campbell’s work.) Like Jung, Campbell has been hugely influential on modern pagans who choose to connect with the gods as archetypes.

Working with an archetype is a little different than working with a deity. For one thing, while archetypes may manifest as gods and goddesses, they can also manifest as fictional characters, historical figures, or abstract symbols. Let’s say you want to tap into the Warrior archetype. You could connect with this archetype by working with gods like Mars, Thor, or Heracles — but you could just as easily do so by working with superheroes like Luke Cage or Colossus, literary figures like Ajax or Achilles, or the abstract concepts of strength and honor.

When pagans worship a deity, it’s because they want to form a relationship with that deity for some reason. But when pagans work with an archetype, it’s usually because they want to embody aspects of that archetype. In our above example, you may be trying to connect to the Warrior archetype to gain confidence or become more assertive.

The biggest difference between worshiping a deity and working with an archetype is that a deity is an external force, while an archetype is an internal force. When you connect with a deity, you are connecting with a spiritual being outside of yourself — a being with their own thoughts, feelings, and drives. When you connect with an archetype, you are connecting with a part of your own psyche. Because of this, archetypes tend to be more easily defined and behave in more predictable ways than deities, although some archetypes can be very complex and multi-faceted.

On the surface, worship and archetype work might be very similar, but the “why” behind the action is fundamentally different.

If you choose to worship the Morrigan, for example, you may have an altar dedicated to her, make regular offerings to her, speak with her in meditations and astral journeys, and/or write poetry or make art in her honor. If you choose to work with the Wild Woman archetype, it may look very similar to an outside observer — you may have an altar dedicated to the Wild Woman energy, speak with manifestations of Wild Woman (perhaps including the Morrigan) in meditation, and write poetry or make art dedicated to this archetype. However, these actions will have a very different intent behind them. Your Wild Woman altar is not a sacred space but a visual trigger to help you connect to the Wild Woman within you. Your meditations are conversations with different aspects of your own personality, not with a separate being. Your art is an expression of self, not a devotional act. The result is a deeper connection to yourself, not a relationship with another being.

I hope I’ve made it clear that archetype work and deity worship can both be very worthwhile spiritual practices, and that each serves its own purpose. Many pagans, myself included, work with both deities and archetypes.

There is some overlap between worshiping a deity and working with an archetype, and many pagans start out with one practice before eventually ending up in the other. Sometimes working with an archetype leads you to encounter a deity who embodies that archetype, which can lead to a relationship with that deity. Likewise, your relationship with a deity may help you become aware of a certain archetype’s influence in your life, which might lead you to work with that archetype.

Making First Contact

First impressions are important. This is true for making new friends, for job interviews, for first dates — and for your first meeting with a god or goddess. In many cases, the way you behave in your first meeting with a deity will set the tone for your relationship with them.

That being said, don’t overthink (or over-stress) about your first impression. You aren’t going to be cursed or punished if you mess this up — at the very worst, the deity might lose interest in connecting with you, and even that can often be remedied with an offering and a polite apology. While it’s always best to get off on the right foot, don’t feel like you need to be perfect.

So, how do you make a good first impression on a god or goddess? Honestly, the rules are largely the same for making a good first impression on any other person. Make sure your physical appearance is clean and tidy — some systems, such as Hellenismos and Kemetic paganism, have special rules for cleansing before contacting the gods, but it’s always a good idea to take a shower first and make sure you’re wearing clean clothes. Likewise, make sure the physical space you invite the gods into is relatively clean — it doesn’t need to be spotless, but take a minute to tidy up before beginning any ritual. Be polite — there’s no need to be overly formal, but you should be respectful. Don’t immediately ask for favors — how would you feel if you met someone at a party and they immediately asked you to do some sort of work for them?

Beyond the basics, it’s wise to make sure you have an idea of who this god is and what they are like before you reach out to them. This will keep you from accidentally doing something offensive. For example, you wouldn’t want to invite them to an altar dedicated to a deity they have a rivalry with. Likewise, you want to avoid offering food or drink that would have been taboo in their original worship. (Of course, there are exceptions to every rule, but when you’re just starting out it’s a good idea to follow the historical framework as closely as possible.)

At the risk of sounding like a broken record: this is why research is so important. Knowing who you are dealing with allows you to deal with them respectfully, gracefully, and competently.

Callings

There’s one aspect of deity worship that is controversial in modern paganism: the idea of being “called” by a deity. This is a question you’ll find many, many heated discussions about online. Do you need to be called by a deity to form a relationship with them? Do deities choose their followers, or do we choose them? How do you know what a call from a deity even looks like?

As I said, this is a controversial topic, but I firmly believe that 1.) you do not have to feel called to a deity beyond being interested in them, and 2.) feeling drawn to a deity’s image, symbols, and myths is a form of calling.

Many pagans do feel like they were called or drawn to the deities they walk most closely with. They may have encountered myths of that deity as a child or teenager and deeply resonated with them, or may have always had an affinity for that god’s sacred animals. They may have dreamed of this deity before knowing who they were, or may have felt a spiritual presence around them before identifying it as a god or goddess.

Many people first encounter the gods in fiction, only for this fictionalized depiction to spark a deeper connection that eventually leads to worship. In the modern era, it’s entirely possible for someone who worships Loki to have first encountered him (or at least a character loosely based on him) in Marvel comics and films, or for someone who worships the Greek pantheon to have first discovered them through the Percy Jackson books. As far as I’m concerned, this is also a valid “call” from deity. The gods are very good at communicating with us through the means available — including fiction.

That being said, just because you don’t already feel a strong connection to a god or goddess doesn’t mean you can’t or shouldn’t worship them. The connection will come with time and effort, just like in any relationship.

Dedication, Patrons, and Matrons

In online spaces such as Tumblr and TikTok, a lot of inexperienced pagans parrot the idea that every pagan needs to have a designated matron and/or patron god and/or needs to be formally dedicated to a god in order to have a close relationship with them. Not only is this untrue, but such restrictions can actually cause harm and/or stunt spiritual growth.

Let’s address dedication first. To be dedicated to a deity means to outwardly declare yourself a servant of that deity, usually with a formal dedication ritual — think of it as the pagan version of joining a convent or going to seminary. It is an outward expression of your devotion and loyalty to that deity. Dedicants are held to a higher standard than the average worshiper by themselves, their communities, and the god(s) they have dedicated to.

Dedication can be a powerful and fulfilling spiritual experience (it’s the backbone of many peoples’ spiritual practice), but it should not be taken lightly. Dedicating yourself to a god or goddess should be a sign of your commitment to them and a deepening of your relationship — it should not be the beginning of that relationship.

Dedication is a lot like marriage. Just like you wouldn’t marry someone you’ve only been on a handful of dates with, you shouldn’t dedicate to a deity just because you’ve had one or two positive experiences with them. Like marriages, dedication can be difficult to get out of — ending your dedication to a deity is possible, but it’s a messy, complicated, uncomfortable process that is sure to shift the foundation of your entire spiritual practice, and not always for the better.

My advice to new and inexperienced pagans is not to even consider dedication until you’ve been practicing for several years. As you begin your journey, your focus should be on exploring your options, forming meaningful connections, and developing a practice that works for you and your unique spiritual needs. Now is the time for experimentation, not lifelong commitments.

But let’s say you are an experienced pagan, and you feel like you are ready for dedication. How do you know if you should dedicate to a given god or goddess?

Dedication may be the logical next step in your relationship with a deity if:

This deity has been an active part of your spiritual practice for at least 2-3 years, with no major gaps in contact with them

You are comfortable upholding this deity’s values for the rest of your life — and are willing to face consequences if you fail to do so

You are willing to dedicate a significant amount of time and effort to the service of this deity

You are willing to face major changes in your life outside your spiritual practice — dedicating to a deity often leads to major shifts that may affect our career, family, and/or relationships

If you answered “yes” to all of the above, dedication may be appropriate. This may seem overly cautious, but remember that dedicating to a deity is a serious, lifelong commitment akin to joining the clergy. For context, it takes at least five years of study and practice to become a Catholic priest, a similar amount of time to become a Jewish rabbi, and three years to become a high priest/ess in Traditional Wicca. If you don’t have the patience to maintain a relationship for a few years before dedication, that is probably a good indicator that dedication isn’t for you.

If you are dedicated to a deity or are planning to dedicate, you may actually choose to attend seminary or receive some other formal religious training. This training will help you to better serve your deity in a public capacity, as you will learn skills like religious counselling, leading ritual, and building community. If your program of study includes ordination, it will also allow you to perform legally binding religious rituals like marriage ceremonies. Depending on your path, attending seminary or training may be your act of formal dedication.

Finally, let me make it clear that dedication does not make you a better pagan than someone who is not dedicated. The choice to dedicate or not dedicate is only one element of your spiritual practice, and it is possible to have a fulfilling and life-affirming practice without dedication. Some of the people who do the most work in the service of the gods are not dedicated to them. You may be one of these people, and that is totally okay.

Patron/matron relationships are a specific type of dedication.

The concept of patron deities comes from Wicca and related neopagan religions. As we’ve previously discussed, Wicca is a duotheistic system with a God and Goddess, whose union is the source of all creation. However, because Wiccans believe that all gods are manifestations of the God and all goddesses are manifestations of the Goddess, some covens choose to work with the God and Goddess in the form of other deities (say, for example, Osiris and Isis), which are referred to as the coven’s “patron” and “matron” deities. In these covens, initiation into the coven’s mysteries (traditionally in the form of first, second, and third degree initiations) typically acts as a form of dedication to these deities.

As Eclectic Wicca has gained popularity in the last few decades, there has been a growing trend of individual Wiccans and eclectic pagans choosing personal patron and/or matron deities. Some Wiccans will have a single god or goddess they are dedicated to, while others feel that it is very important to be dedicated to exactly one masculine deity and exactly one feminine deity. This second model is the one I see most often in online pagan spaces, especially Tumblr and TikTok.

The patron/matron model can be useful for some pagans, but it is not one-size-fits-all. As I mentioned, this model of dedication comes from Wicca, and is a very modern concept. In ancient pagan religions, most people would not have been dedicated in this way. That does not mean that this isn’t a valid form of worship (it absolutely is), but it does mean that those who practice reconstructionist paths may not be inclined to interact with deity this way.

The guidelines for patron/matron relationships are similar to the guidelines for dedication in general, but these relationships often (but not always) have a more parental nature. For some people, having a divine mother and/or father figure is ideal — especially for those who are healing from parental trauma or abuse. If you feel drawn to this type of deity relationship, I encourage you to explore it.

On the other hand, you may not have any interest in the patron/matron model, and that’s totally fine! It’s called polytheism for a reason — if you prefer to maintain less formal relationships with many gods, you should feel free to do so.

I hope this post has helped clarify some of the murkier aspects of polytheism and deity work. Obviously, this is only the tip of the iceberg — I could write a book about this topic and many, many authors already have. However, I think the information here is enough to get you started, and I hope that it will provide a first step on your journey with your gods.

Resources:

Wicca for Beginners by Thea Sabin

A Witches’ Bible by Janet and Stewart Farrar

The Spiral Dance by Starhawk

Where the Hawthorn Grows by Morgan Daimler

The Way of Fire and Ice by Ryan Smith

Jessi Huntenburg (YouTuber), “Dancing with Deity | Discovering Gods, Goddesses, and Archetypes,” “Archetype, Deity, and Inviting Transpersonal Experience,” and “10 Ways to Bond with Deity”

Kelly-Ann Maddox (YouTuber), “How to Have Deep Connections with Deities”

[monsoonblooms12]

Hey I’m rather new in the oph fandom. Love your works! Can you recommend other writers that posts fic or edits? Also, can you maybe recommend one/two fics/edits for each writer? I’m really need to read more but couldn’t find that many at the moment. Thanks!

Firstly, A very warm welcome to you in the oph fandom, my lovely anon💕 Hope you have your best time here.

It means so much to me that you like my works, thank you so much!

And I most definitely can💕! I will try to mention as many writers whom I can remember and whose works I have read, and I apologize incase I missed someone. So, in no particular order whatsoever:

@jamespotterthefirst : All of her works are amazing and you will fall in love with them. I highly recommend her Regency Era AU and the Pictagram Series, where she has retold the stories of oph book 1 through social media. Oh and she is also rewriting OPH 3, and you should definitely check it out.

@genevievemd : She has so many amazing stories & edits! You can start with her oph 2 rewrite with her own spinoffs or her The Year Between Series which is a mix of social media edits & fics.

@schnitzelbutterfingers : There are a few gems in her masterlist. One of my favorites is the mystery AU she was writing, The Forgotten One.

@gryffindordaughterofathena : Her angst will kill you, but you will fall in love with her writing. Her Oph 2 & 3 rewrite, a fix it series, is a good place to start. You will also love her 5 stages of grief series.

@stygianflood : You will be in awe of her writing, and will definitely feel like "Wow, that's amazing!". It's pure poetry! Her latest fic, Pua Melia, is a beautiful one based on the Hawaii Chapter of Oph 3.

@starrystarrytrouble : Even though she is not currently active here, her masterlist holds some on favorite fics ever. Her fluff is absolutely heartwarming. You can read her latest fic, Secrets.

@estellaelysian : Her writing has an amazing depth that will make you stop and wonder. One of my favorites from her is Ocean Kiss, the fic she wrote about the Miami Chapter of Oph 1.

@terrm9 : Her style of writing is so unique! You get a glimpse of both the sides and she does it so perfectly. Her micro fics are a good place to start.

@a-crepusculo : Her edits and her writing, both are gorgeous. You can begin with the Five Senses series she has been writing.

@mm2305 : Her content is amazing! She has numerous edits and her Regency Era fic, An eventful encounter is one of favorites.

@headoverheelsforramsey : She will break you with the angst, and she will give you life with the fluff. I recommend checking out Distance makes your heart grow fonder series if you want to cry and Game of hearts if you want to cry laughing.

@izzyourresidentlawyer : Her fics are absolutely beautiful and their is a beautiful inclusion of her culture in them which I adore. Her paalam patawad series is amazing (but have some tissues ready with you, you will need them)

@starryeyedrookie : She has some great works, out of wich her Oph Ch 11 fic, Before it's too late is one of my favorites.

@bex-la-get : She has got some amazing content which you will come to love. The curious case of Dr Ramsey is the first fic I read of hers, and I fell in love with her writing, so I guess you can start from that.

@anotherbeingsworld : If you want some wholesome Bryce fics to read, her masterlist is the place to go. I specifically adore her Coffee Shop AU fic, The start of something new.

@mvalentine : She has some truly beautiful pieces in her masterlist and you should check them out.

@drethanramslay : Her Voicemails series will make you cry and give you hope. You should definitely read it. Her Bryce x MC rewrite series is amazing too!

@adiehardfan : She has just begun writing but there are already many great works in her masterlist. You should definitely check them out.

@emmasumbrella : She has quite a few amazing fics and edits. Her ongoing series, Sinister Secrets is a good place to start.

@lsvdw-blog : Her angst will kill you. Really "rip your heart" kind of kill you. Her series Already Here is beautiful.

@takeharryandgo : Her writing is so beautiful and you will definitely be in awe of her works. Her Sherlock Holmes AU series is an amazing place to start.

@writer-ish : She has some beautiful (and hilarious) text fics and her writing is amazing.

@liaromancewriter : Her masterlist is full of amazing content and she has numerous fics and edits. Her AU series, Fated is an amazing place to start.

So, that's all I can remember for now (terrible memory, can't help it😅) Once again, Apologies to anyone I forgot, and incase someones wants add some more names to the list, feel free to do that❤

I also recommend you check out @openheartfanfics, I am sure you will find many amazing writers there!

Anon, I hope you have an amazing time here and thank you so much once again🧡

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hello Steph 😊 Do you have any BAMF Molly or just some good fics that feature Molly? I need some Molly love at the moment because I just read a fic where she "turns to the drak side" so to speak, and my heart 😭😭😭

Hey Nonny!

Ah I did a few comm. recs lists recently with Molly, but here are what I can offer you from memory, LOL. PLEASE add your fave Molly fics, guys! PLEASE NOTE these are fics I’ve read, and please check the sub-headings for a TONNE of stuff I haven’t read!! Big title so I can find it later LOL.

MOLLY PLAYS A ROLE

See also:

COMM RECS: Coming Out To Molly

COMM RECS: Molly with Women

COMM RECS: Molly and Greg Push John and Sherlock Together

COMM RECS: Molly as a Villain

Santa Knows by Itsallfine (T, 1,719 w., 1 Ch. || Christmas Party, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Fluff, Matchmaking, POV Sherlock, Pining Sherlock) – Sherlock and John both get exactly what they want from the Yard's secret Santa exchange. Pure holiday fluff.

What John Doesn't Know (Won't Hurt Him) by blueink3 (NR [T], 4,392 w., 1 Ch, || S3 Fix It, Pining Sherlock, Snippets of Life, Hurt/Comfort, Scars, Fluff and Angst, Five and One, Hopeful Ending, POV Sherlock) – Five people who see Sherlock's scars before John Watson. But Sherlock's secrets were never something he could keep from his blogger for long.

Thirty Three Hours Without John Watson by Bookaholic, mybrotherharry (M, 6,232 w. || First Kiss / Time, Pining Idiots, BG Mystrade, Crackish) – Sherlock can SO TOTALLY survive without John Watson. It should be a piece of cake. AKA the time when Sherlock braved grocery store lines for milk, purchased and gave away a box of tampons and figured out what the X-Factor is. Greg and Mycroft didn’t sign up for this shit. Next time, they are going to the Bahamas.

Wonderful, Etcetera. by VictoryCandescence (T, 16,955 w., 3 Ch. || Wonderful Life AU || Alternate Timelines, Brotherhood, Homophobia, Suicidal Ideations, Mentions of Drug Use, Friendship, Different TRF, Sherlock’s Past, Victor Trevor is Past Boyfriend, Depression, Hallucination, Love Confessions, Christmas, First Kiss) – Sherlock thinks everyone would be better off if he had never existed, including and especially himself. When he finds himself in a world in which his wish has been granted, he begins to think perhaps even he could be wrong – but it takes an unlikely chaperone to make him not only observe, but understand.

Insanity in the Middle by DotyTakeThisDown (E, 28,010 w., 8 Ch. || Equestrian Sports AU || Alternate First Meeting, POV John, Pining John, Bottomlock, Clueless Sherlock, First Kiss/Time, Passionate Kisses, Hand Holding, Caught Making Out, Bed Sharing, Spooning, Blow Job) – John is a world-class eventing rider with a gold medal and several four-star wins to his credit, but he's never won at Rolex. Sherlock is an up-and-coming rider taking the sport by storm.

Love or What You Will by miss_frankenstein (T, 31,987 w., 11 Ch. || College/Uni AU || Professor John, Ph.D Student Sherlock, Pining John, Poetry, Falling in Love / Slow Burn, Light Angst, Happy Ending) – John is an English professor who specializes in War and Post-War Literature and Sherlock is the brilliant yet impossible Ph.D. student assigned to be his TA because no one in the Chemistry Department is willing to put up with him. And - somewhere between Waugh and Plath, e-mails and takeaway, novels and villanelles - they fall in love.

The Wrong Wagon by DancingGrimm (E, 35,663 w., 20 Ch. || Alternating POV, Molly/  John [Molly pines for John], Public Sex, Casual Sex, Obliviousness, BAMF!John, Awkwardness, Angst & Humour, First Time, Virgin Sherlock, Jealous Sherlock) – Molly sees John in a new light and realises that she may have hitched her horse to the wrong wagon...or something like that. John pines for Sherlock and worries what he will think if he ever finds out. And Sherlock doesn't know what Molly's up to...but he knows he doesn't like it.

The Pieces That Fall to Earth by Itsallfine (M, 49,513 w., 84 Ch. || S4 Fix-It, Epistolary, Love Confessions, Slow Burn, Parentlock, Past Abuse, Coming Out, Internalized Homophobia, Questioning Sexuality, Mental Health Issues / Therapy, Angst, Happy Ending) – John and Sherlock have hit rock bottom, but with all their armor stripped away, they can finally speak honestly, seek healing, and find the truths that matter most. An epistolary post-s4 fix-it fic. Now complete. (This fic is rated T except for one very clearly marked and easily skippable chapter, which is rated M.) Part 1 of The Pieces that Fall to Earth

floating through a dark blue sky by Lediona (M, 58,966 w., 15 Ch. || Notting Hill AU || POV John, Celebrity Sherlock, First Date / Time / Kiss, Past Drug Addiction, Angst with a Happy Ending) – Of course, I’d seen his films and always thought he was, well, brilliant -- but, you know, a million miles from the world I live in. Or, when John is the owner of a travel book shop and the famous Sherlock Holmes stops in one day.

This Thing All Things Devours by cypress_tree (E, 63,844 w., 15 Ch. || In Time AU || Science Fiction, Dystopian Universe, First Meetings, Action / Adventure, Romance) – In 2169, time is money—literally. Humans are genetically engineered to stop aging at 25, when the numbers on their arm start counting down from one year. When that time is up, they die. The only way to get more time is to earn it, borrow it, or steal it.John Watson lives day-to-day in the crowded slums of Zone 13. He never imagined living any differently—until he meets the practically-immortal Sherlock, and helps him on a case to track a local time-thief...

Northwest Passage by Kryptaria (E, 95,157 w., 27 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Canadian AU ||  BAMF!John, Canadian John, PTSD, Anal / Oral Sex, Rimming, Emotional Hurt / Comfort, Drug Rehab, Falling in Love, Pining Sherlock, Love Confessions, Sherlock’s Violin, Panic Attacks, Switching, Anxious / Protective Sherlock, Hugs for Comfort, Suicide Mentions, Healing Each Other) – Seven years ago, Captain John Watson of the Canadian Forces Medical Service withdrew from society, seeking a simple, isolated life in the distant northern wilderness of Canada. Though he survives from one day to the next, he doesn't truly live until someone from his dark past calls in a favor and turns his world upside-down with the introduction of Sherlock Holmes." Part 1 of Tales from the Northwest

The Stars Move Still by BeautifulFiction (E, 96,022 w., 5 Ch. || Magical Realism, Demons, Slash to Pre-Slash, AU, Happy Ending, Souls) – "What could I want so desperately that would make me sell my soul? What could possibly compel me to surrender the part of myself that makes me who I am: the source of my magic, my self-control, everything?”

Definitions by siennna (T, 101,528 w., 12 of ? Ch. || Dev. Rel., Pining, Fluff and Romance, First Kiss, Love Confessions, Fluff, Cuddles, Girl’s Night, Texting, Virgin Sherlock, Drunk Sherlock, Background Mollstrade, Hair Petting, Laying on Lap) – Sherlock’s journey in defining his flat mate and stumbling through the muddled world of emotion. {{This feels complete; the chapter count is listed as ? but I feel like it is done}}

between each beat are words unsaid by darcylindbergh, hudders-and-hiddles (T, 107,998 w., 215 Ch. || Epistolary, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Angst, Happy Ending) – On their wedding night, John and Sherlock gift each other with the things they each said when the other could not hear, the things they each put down where the other could not see: a collection of writings that illustrate the way their love for one another has grown over the years. Part 1 of between each beat

The Burning Heart by May_Shepard (M, 119,150 w., 21 Ch. || Canon Divergence, Post-TRF, John’s Sexuality, S3 Rewrite, Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, POV John Watson, John’s Gay) – When Sherlock dies, John Watson feels like his life is over too. He’s completely shut down, until Mark Morstan, a new nurse at John’s medical clinic, catches his attention, and helps him uncover the long buried truth of his attraction to men. Although he’s certain he’ll never get over Sherlock, John plans to move on, and build a new life with Mark, unaware that Sherlock is not quite as dead as he appears, and that Mark is hiding secrets of his own.

A Further Sea by i_ship_an_armada & ShinySherlock (E, 125,492 w., 23 Ch. || Historical Pirates AU || Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Doctor John / Pirate Captain Sherlock, Sailing, UST / RST, Masturbation, Action / Adventure, Mild Angst & Peril, Romance, Shaving, Molly/Janine, Bottomlock, Hand / Blow Jobs, Past Drug Use, Slow Burn, Mild Violence, Facial Shaving, Happy Ending) – Here be a tale of adventure for both body and soul, but beware if ye be not of stout heart, for this be piratelock, ya savvy? Luckless ship's surgeon John Watson takes a chance, and finds himself eye to eye with The Ghost, the scourge of the seven seas and a definite thorn in the side of the blaggard, James Moriarty. But when John finds there's more to this most cunning pirate than be meetin' the eye, he has to choose... is it a pirate's life for him?

The Horse and his Doctor by khorazir (T, 129,003 w., 13 Ch. || Horse / Vet AU || Magical Realism, Horses, Vet John, Horse Sherlock, Implied Alcoholism) – Invalided after a run in with a poacher in Siberia, veterinary surgeon John Watson finds it difficult to acclimatise to the mundanity of London life. Things change when a friend invites him along to a local animal shelter and he meets their latest acquisition, a trouble-making Frisian with the strangest eyes and even stranger quirks John has ever encountered in a horse.

Performance In a Leading Role by Mad_Lori (E, 156,714 w., 21 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Hollywood / Actor AU, Secret Relationship, Falling in Love, Slow Burn, Romance, Coming Out, Fluff and Angst, Pining) – Sherlock Holmes is an Oscar winner in the midst of a career slump. John Watson is an Everyman actor trapped in the rom-com ghetto. When they are cast as a gay couple in a new independent drama, will they surprise each other? Will their on-screen romance make its way into the real world? Part 1 of Performance in a Leading Role

Mise en Place by azriona (M, 161,004 w., 28 Ch. || Restaurant (Kitchen Nightmares) AU || Sherlock is Gordon Ramsay / Celebrity Sherlock, Restauranteur John, Harry Plays Prominent Role, Alternating POV, Mutual Pining, Cranky Sherlock, Bed Sharing, Slow Burn) – John Watson had no intentions of taking over the family business, but when he returns from Afghanistan, battered and bruised, and discovers that his sister Harry has run their restaurant into the ground, he doesn't have much choice. There's only one thing that can save the Empire from closing for good – the celebrity star of the BBC series Restaurant Reconstructed, Chef Sherlock Holmes. Part 1 of Mise en Place

[thoughtdestroyer]

Desperation Relapse

Growing up i had a hard time

With adjustments

Life was always changing too fast

I’m excited to document why

Because it feels freeing

At last

I hid behind myself feelings

Let them take the blame

The anger, the guilt I’m dealing

With a healthy dose of shame

I have always hated scammers

And fought and somehow won

But its not because of hate that my winning

Is done

I win because I love

Freely

All the time

I am sure love is good for my health

But not after first dealing with my

Little self

The child in me was bright and clear

Not sure if pure is the word to use here

Purity isn't a human trait

It’s better left to things

Characters, fantasy, even kinks

It’s a struggle I've had for a lot of my life

It manifests when friendship with boys

Encounter desires strife

Its not like im ever intentionally excluding

I’m not trying to yank a chain

I’m not trying to dominate you

Or even put you through pain

I am just trying to be me

It is just to attempt to be free

I and therefore you am deserving of a love without stalking

Constantly checking and peeping and coughing

I swear love always has my attention

But i live in the scam world, not the

Fantasy dimension

I’m Practicing practically

The things i wish to say

The poetry within them

The music that they play

Can’t one black woman in the world

Have a little privacy?

I do love to make friends online

I love to think and give them my time

Every now and then desire climbs

And i was to follow her to the beat

Of her time

But I already know which love is mine

I really love Blue

It reminds me of god itself

Every person’s first love

Spiritually really can be decisive

Deceiving it can feel fake

It can feel like a trick played by a sexy little snake

But im just a girl

I really like cringe

I used to like gore

From the times i used to hurt before

Recoiling away? It keeps me protected

It keeps the ones i love from getting infected

Fear is hate, it’s simply said.

I’m really trying not to fear the beautiful sad old man in my head

But paranoia is a thing i had when i was little

Barely recovered and the highs made that fickle

My communication skills to not need to be tickled

But that game is still super fun

I was hoping

I’d play for a while with someone

But without concrete evidence

Everything and everyone sucks

You need to know what feel

When you want to fuck

What I’m saying is

I know stuff hurts

But it really isn't all bad

I’m leaving this note deep enough for me

That one day I’ll follow a path to find it

Asitting in my notes app

It’s not enough to step behind it

Turn it around

And behead it with a knife

Otherwise I’d never again feel strife!

Goals are never mandatory.

But action definitely is.

Cycles n patterns are real

Meanings are what we choose

I chose romance and i guess you chose this?

But it’s literally okay

I don’t need your kisses

My life is starting to look

Like I won 3 wishes

Decent enough to live in

So if you want to stay, stay

If you want to go, go

I can live my way too though

You know?

[amane-by-together]

Hanafuda || Amane Yugi

(Part 1 of 10)

genre: fluff, school, slice of life, modern au (where all wonders live)

summary: amane yugi spends his school days skipping classes until he meets [name] [surname], a student from the other class, who was also skipping classes and eventually the two of them formed a platonic friendship. cutting classes and playing hanafuda together strengthens their friendship but soon unexpected feelings blossom between the two.

“Amane-kun.” [name] was shuffling the hanafuda cards together for them to play, she glanced over to the choppy haired boy who was sitting crossed legged against the rooftop's railings. “You going to the next class?”

“Nah.” Amane answers while fiddling with his locks of hair. “We probably skipped three classes this day, wanna skip classes in fourth period?” he smirked playfully.

“What class do you have in fourth period?” [name] asked, giving Amane some seven hanafuda cards. “Math?”

“Literature.” He received the cards and scooted in front of her. [name] flashed him a quick grin, her competitive side is showing all of a sudden when it comes to hanafuda. Amane stared at his cards and groaned. “Ugh, why do I get the worse cards?”

“I dunno, I wasn't looking when I was shuffling them.” [name] purses her lips together as she analyzes her cards. Her [eye color] colored eyes met with Amane's amber eyes. “Hm. Let's start!”

“You go ahead, [name]-san.”

“Hm~? Alrighty then~” [name] stretched her arms and let out a satisfying sound from her lips. She placed a sakura card with the tag to its match and took another card from the stack and placed it along with the cards on the center since it has no match. “Winner gets to sleep in the loser's lap.” she added.

“[name]-san, you know so damn well I'm not good with these things.” he murmured with a blush while putting a matsu card on the center.

Amane met [name] by chance. He often skip classes alone week by week, no one seemed to notice his absence which was fine by him. One day, he decided to stay on the rooftop and saw a girl sitting by herself with her phone. It must be fate or a coincidence, he thought.

The thing is, he has never seen this girl from the classes he attended to so he assumed that she's from the different class where Tsukasa, his twin brother, is. “Tsukasa-kun?!” she exclaimed at their first encounter. “What the frickety frack are you doing here?!”

Amane scratches his cheek and sweat dropped. He spoke. “I'm not Tsukasa though, I'm his older twin.”

[name] blinked she stood up from the bench and went over to Amane. The choppy haired boy slightly backed away from her. “Your tone is lowered down a bit, your eyes shaped like the crescent moon, yeah you're not Tsukasa-kun.” she muttered.

“I'm Amane Yugi, first year highschool, from class A.” he introduced himself while twiddling his fingers. “I'm Tsukasa's older brother though.” he chuckled.

“[name] [surname], same year as you but I'm from class B. Nice to meet you, Amane-kun.” [name] sat back down to the bench, she patted the extra space next to her. “Come, sit next to me.”

Amane hesitated a bit but shrugged and sat next to [name]. The female grinned, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “I guess you're skipping classes like me.”

“I've been skipping multiple times, no one noticed it yet, how about you?” Amane scooted closer till their shoulders touched, his bangs became parted from the side due to the slight wind that passed by.

“I started skipping on the beginning of first year.” [name] pulls out a packet of melon bread and gave it to Amane which he gratefully accepts it. Amane and [name] ate in pure silence, munching on to the bread that [name] bought recently which was originally for herself.

During those days of skipping classes, they would play hanafuda together on the rooftop. [name] would frequently win during their matches, guess luck really isn't compatible with Amane. The two of them quickly became close due to their meet ups when they're skipping classes together.

“Amane-kun, I know you have the full moon bright card.” [name] eyed him suspiciously but a shadow casted over to her face with a funny glint in her eyes. She placed an ume card with a red tag on it. “Red Poetry Tags, I win again~!”

“I couldn't even get a lot of yaku combinations.” Amane helped [name] to clean up the cards. “I knew I should give up the plain cards.”

Amane blushed at the thought of [name] laying down on his lap, he doesn't even know what to do when that happens, maybe he should play with her hair or massage her cheek?

[name] happily laid down on his lap, Amane grabbed his hoodie and placed it on top of her skirt. “Ne, [name]…” his hands reached over to caress her hair with his fingers. “Let's have lunch together.”

“Sure, I don't really have someone to share my lunch with,” Amane looked down on her laying on his lap and gave her a soft smile. He tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and started to pet her head, he reminded her of a cat. [name] would often keep her distance from others makes her cat-like according to him.

Though there's a part of [name] that doesn't want to open up to people, Amane was pretty much the same as her. “I got tired from work, yesterday.” he mentions with a small chuckle.

“Wait, you have a part time job?” [name] asked as her eyes piqued in interest, wanting to know what he does for work. “Where?”

Amane's cheeks grew warm, he slightly drooped his eyes and said. “I'm not telling you.”

“Why though?”

“You'd probably show up if I did.”

[name] turned her head to face his embarrassed look. She smiled playfully while wiping a dramatic tear from her eye. “You know me so well.” she faked a sniff.

“It's embarrassing...” Amane grumbled. [name] reached her hand out and placed it on to his cheek. He leans against her touch, the feeling of warmth and serenity made him smile a bit.

“But it's not. The fact that you're working is admirable.” [name] assured him with a smile unbeknownst to her that Amane's heart definitely skipped a beat on that act. “Pinch~” she cheekily grins while pinching his cheek.

“Owsh—” Amane tried to say while his cheek is being pulled by [name] and by that she releases her cheek. “That hurts...” he pouted.

“Have this for payback.” Amane returned the favor by pinching her cheek. Her cheeks were like mochi, which he likes to point it out just to tease her. “Mochiii~”

[name] deadpans. “You're treating me like some kind of mochi instead of a person.”

“Exactly.” The bell suddenly rang interrupting the two teens. Amane grabbed his bag that was on the bench. [name] punched a hole on the juice box using a straw and took a sip.

Amane leaned back against the railings, unboxing his lunch and ate. [name] didn't feel like eating, a juice box can satisfy her stomach after all. “[name]-san, don't you have lunch?”

“I forgot it at home.” she replied nonchalantly, she kept on having a stoic face until her stomach betrayed her by letting out a small growl. Amane stop eating halfway at the sound. “That’s nothing~” she denied that she was hungry.

“Here, I’ll give you some of my lunch.” Amane picked up a piece of egg roll using his chopsticks and raised it in front of [name]. “Say ahh~”

“O-Oi!” [name] flinched as she backed away from him. Amane’s brow creases in pure confusion. “Y-You don’t have to...”

“I can’t let you skip lunch, [name]-san.” The choppy haired boy smiled while putting the egg roll near her mouth, then his smile turned into a painful one. “Just take a bite, my hand is getting tired.”

[name] sighed in defeat, she was very hungry and was wrong about the juice box making her full. She tucked a hair behind her ear and ate the egg roll that Amane offered for her, his heart skipped a beat whilst she pulled away. “I guess, sharing lunch is not a bad idea...”

“Also, your lunch tastes good.” [name] scooted next to Amane to see his boxed lunch, she pointed at the ghost-shaped sausages, the bunny shaped rice balls and egg rolls. “You made that?”

Amane nodded with a slight blush on his face but the smile on his face didn't falter. “Well yeah, at the first time I made one of these they were all sloppy but practice makes perfect so I'm able to make one. If you'd like, I'll make you one or we can be matching too~!”

“Let's have matching lunches, duh.” [name] opens her mouth and ate another piece of egg roll that Amane was offering her. “But before that, I'll make us some lunch for us to share.”

“[name]-san, here have a sausage.” Amane feeds her the ghost-shaped sausages which the latter hummed contently. Amane took a bite on one of the sausages, he pulled out his phone and swallowed his food. “Hey, [name]-san,”

[name] stopped chewing her food. “Hm?”

“Wanna go home early?” Amane said with a mischievous grin, he's mostly the bad influence when it comes to reckless things like skipping classes. [name] had no idea why he has a lot of plans regarding this. “This is getting boring, don't cha think so?”

“And how do we plan to sneak out from school?” [name] asked, quirking a brow whilst waiting for an answer.

“We can jump off the roof.” Amane suggests.

“No. We'll freaking die if we did or even break our bones.” [name] shuddered. “If we did, they'll think it's just some lovers' su—”

“Nevermind that then.” Amane flailed his hands in front of her. “I guess we should wait till dismissal then...”

“Wanna play again?” [name] asked as she showed him the small box containing the cards.

Amane smiled. “Sure.”

Amane sat alone on a concrete bench, listening to the soft pitter patter of the rain surrounding him. Holding the clear umbrella from his right hand, he sighed as if he's gonna make a monologue or something.

He has friends from his class but none of them made him feel real. The only person who can make him feel like himself was no other than [name].

[name], to Amane, was everything to him. Meeting her was fate as if they were meant to meet in the first place. Back then, Amane admired some girls yet only because they're pretty. None of them were ever even close to him, he only felt shallow for them.

“Sorry for making you wait—” [name]'s voice cuts him off from his inner monologue. She held up her school bag on top of her head to prevent her from the rain. She grins blithely. “You don't have to be sitting the exact same way.”

“My uniform is a bit soaked.” [name] added with a wince. Amane licked the side of his lip and stood up to put the umbrella above her. “It was literally sunny recently.”

“Hm, I'll be taking you home.” Amane hands her the umbrella to [name], went over to his bike and puts his school bag in the basket. “Which way is your house?”

“That's like a novel way to put it but I guess that works.” [name] pointed out. “Sounds like a romance cliche, not gonna lie, lmao.”

Amane stepped on to his bike, [name] held on to his shoulders from behind. He was thankful that she didn't get to see his blushing face, because that's lowkey what every guy felt when there's a girl behind them on a bike.

Amane started pedalling. [name] closes the umbrella and sits down instead. “It stopped raining, by the way.” she declared.

[name] wrapped her arms around his torso and that's how Amane's face erupt in a huge blush. “[name]-san?!” he stammered at the sudden action.

“...Don't say a word about this.”

“I'm sorry, what?”

[name]'s face flushes, she buried her face on his back and that's where his heart started to beat faster. Out of all the girls he admired throughout the years, his feelings for [name] is different.

How so you may ask? When Amane is around [name] it's like he's sitting on a fluffy pink cotton candy or maybe standing on water that reflects a pastel pink sky with soft looking clouds with her. “You know, with you hugging me from behind isn't that kinda...” Amane turned his head towards [name] and smirked playfully. “Bold for you~?”

[name] tightens the hold in irritation. “Ack—” Amane's hold on the handle became wobbly but managed to maintain his balance. [name] elicits a small giggle in return.

“Hm, wanna skip again tomorrow?”

“If its with you, why not?”

“You're so cheesy.” [name] slightly smacked his shoulder. Amane turned ahead, a smile forming from his lips.

‘Nonetheless, I don't really mind skipping with you even if it means being with you...’

“Hold on tight, we're going downhill!” Amane gripped on the handles of his bike. [name]'s eyes widened when she saw that that they were about to go down on a slope.

“Cheers to us delinquents!” [name] cheered before they go down to the road.

Definition and terms:

hanafuda - flower cards that can be played in a variety of games such as koi koi (the type of game that [name] and amane are playing with the cards)

sakura - cherry blossom

matsu - pine tree

ume - plum blossom

-end of part 1-

thank you for reading, make sure to like and reblog if you love this post~

taglist: @closetwaffle @closetweebsmh

[kinda-just-chillin-here]

Greek Mythology and Julie & the Phantoms

My first watch through of Julie and the Phantoms (JATP), I noticed a few similarities and parallels to certain myths within Greek mythology. On my million rewatches, I paid more attention to see if there were others. This post is all my observations of the parallels, as well as a few possible theories for season 2 the writers could follow for certain storylines. This is a ridiculously long read, I apologize.

**Disclaimers: 

There are spoilers, so if you haven’t finished watching for the first time yet, don’t read this. 

The content in Greek myths can vary depending on the source. This is largely due to the fact they are just super old. So some of the myths might be slightly different. I did my best just to compare to the gist of the myth. 

I’m going to refer to Luke, Reggie, and Alex together as either Sunset Curve or the boys to save space. 

I apologize for any typos and mistakes; midterm season has left me with an empty head.

1. Orpheus

Obviously a major motif in the first season is the Orpheum. Orpheum literally means House of Orpheus. 

Background information of Orpheus:

His mother is Calliope (muse of epic poetry), and depending on the version of the story, his father is either Apollo (god of the sun, healing, music, medicine, archery, and poetry) or King Oeagrus of Thrace. 

Orpheus was considered to be one of the greatest musicians. He had a “divinely gifted voice that could charm anyone who heard it,” no god or mortal could resist his music. 

Let’s look at some of his myths.

Orpheus and Eurydice:

The basic summary of this myth is that Eurydice, Orpheus’ wife, died after being bitten by snakes while running away from a man, Aristaeus, or a satyr (depends on source) who wanted her for himself. Devastated, Orpheus began singing sad songs until he was advised by nymphs to go to the Underworld and bring her back. After singing to Hades and Persephone, they agreed to let Eurydice return to the main world. However, they warned him not to look back before they both entered the light of the surface. He happily began his trek back to the surface. When Orpheus reached the exit, Eurydice in toe, he turned around to see her, anxious to make sure it wasn’t a trick, that she was really there. Only, Eurydice was still in the Underworld, she hadn’t crossed over yet. Orpheus turning around when he did, caused Eurydice to remain in the underworld. 

So who’s who?

Julie = Orpheus (talented musician and desperate to save their love from the Underworld)

Sunset Curve = Eurydice (dead and trapped)

Caleb = Aristaeus and Hades (wants Eurydice/Sunset Curve for himself; controls the place the dead are) 

Hollywood Ghost Club (HGC) = The Underworld

How do they relate? Stand Tall (s1e09) is where it all goes down.

Like Aristaeus, Caleb is pursing Sunset Curve because he wants them for himself (and Caleb is also threaten by the power they have).

Caleb has the boys trapped in the HGC, just like Eurydice in the Underworld. 

Julie had to deal with the idea the boys died (again) when they didn’t show up before the performance. At first she couldn’t, she ran out until she had a sign from her mom, telling her to go on stage. You could argue this sort of parallels the nymphs telling Orpheus to plea to Hades, or that it parallels Orpheus on his journey back to the surface after Hades agreed.

This is where Julie and Orpheus differ. Julie goes onstage, fully believing in the sign from her mother; that even if the boys don’t come, she can do it. The lyrics of Stand Tall are pure genius. “Keep moving on, never look back.” That’s exactly what Julie does. Unlike Orpheus, Julie doesn’t look back. And the boys appear, no longer trapped by Caleb at the HGC. Julie breaks away from the Orpheus formula and wins. 

@multifandomterrors wrote an essay on how it relates too! She has three theories of how it fits and I definitely recommend you check it out!

Bonus reasons Julie is Orpheus:

Orpheus joined Jason and the Argonauts. When the ship was approaching the Sirens, Orpheus saves the crew from death by playing his own music, drowning out the Sirens’ Song. Likewise, Julie is able to save the boys from Caleb. You can argue that her singing Stand Tall acted as a beacon, beckoning the boys away from Caleb and back to her, saving them in the process.

This one is more of a long shot but oh well. Orpheus is said to have a “divinely gifted voice that could charm anyone who heard it,” that no god or mortal could resist his music. The boys say that Julie has “the voice of an angel.” Throughout the season, as soon as Julie starts to sing, people are generally drawn in, even Carrie by the end. 

Onto the next parallel...

2. Lotus Eaters

As soon as the slightest idea of the boys missing the dance was hinted at I knew it was going to happen because ~formulas~, but once they got to the HGC, I had a strong feeling it was going to be a Lotus Eaters situation. 

Summary of the Lotus Eaters:

In The Odyssey, Odysseus and his crew encounter the Lotus Eaters. They do as their name suggests, they eat the peculiar Lotus flower. When the lotus flower is eaten, those who eat it are “overcome with a blissful forgetfulness,” and want to do nothing more than stay where they are. The crew mates had to be dragged back to the ship, otherwise they never would have returned to their duties. The most well known adaptation of this is probably the Lotus Casino in Percy Jackson & the Olympians series, where the characters spend days/years there, only thinking it was a few hours/days. It’s a time warp per se. 

So what’s what?

Hollywood Ghost Club =  Lair/island of the lotus eaters (everyone there appears to have no other worries in life)

The music & dancing = Lotus flower (sucks everyone in)

How do they relate?

Once Caleb starts performing, Sunset Curve are sucked in. Eventually, they are overcome with a “blissful forgetfulness” and forget about Julie and the dance. They only get sucked back out once Caleb mentions it’s the witching hour.

Alex literally says “This place is some sort of time warp.”

When the boys try to leave, the dancers and then Caleb try to reel them back in. 

The next is not directly Greek mythology, but distantly related:

3. Disney’s Hercules 

The story in Disney’s Hercules isn’t exactly what the myths of Heracles are. It’s Disney, so of course the stories are romanticized and changed significantly. First of all, in the original myths, Hercules is really named Heracles, and Megara is nothing more than Heracles’ wife that ends with a tragic story.

In the movie, Hades wants Hercules dead since he is the only one that can ruin his plan to take over the world. He enlists Megara (or Meg, whose soul he owns) to get to know him and find his weakness. As Meg gets to know Hercules, they fall in love. Hades uses this as Hercules’ weakness, and once he outs Meg for working for him, Hercules is emotionally defeated. However, he still gives up his power for 24 hours, as long as Meg remains untouched by harm. Of course that doesn’t happen, and Meg dies while saving Hercules. Her soul is returned to the Underworld, and Hercules journeys down there to save her, even though he might die doing so. Except he doesn’t; he saves Meg, and it’s happily ever after. 

So who’s who?

Alex = Hercules

Willie = Meg

Caleb = Hades

How does it relate?

Like Hades wants Hercules dead, Caleb wants Alex (and the boys) under his control because they are too powerful. He’s threatened by them.

Even though Willie didn’t mean to bring the boys into the mess with Caleb, he still did (no hate, I love my son). Willie acts as Meg in this situation because Caleb still uses him to get to the boys. Caleb gets to put his stamp on them.

Willie, just like Meg, decides to not help Caleb anymore, though he’s still stuck. He cares about Alex, he doesn’t want him to be stuck at the HGC like him forever; he doesn’t want Caleb to own Alex’s soul. So, Willie helps Alex and the boys with their plan to crossover. 

In Stand Tall, right before You’ve Got Nothing to Lose, Caleb appeals to each of the boys’ weakness. Caleb says “Everything you want, including Willie, is right here.” Just like Hades uses Meg against Hercules, Caleb uses Willie against Alex.

Potential Season 2 Willex Storyline

The parallel to Hercules and Meg isn’t finished. Alex hasn’t saved Willie from Caleb yet, and Caleb hasn’t been defeated yet. We don’t see Willie after the Willex hug in Stand Tall. I think it’s safe to assume that Willie is not safe from Caleb, especially since he helped Sunset Curve escape Caleb’s curse. There’s a lot of things that could happen. One of my assumptions is that Caleb is going to use Willie as bait to lure Alex back in. Another is that, like how Hercules goes to the Underworld to save Meg’s soul,  Alex is going to actively choose to return to the HGC to try to save Willie from Caleb. 

And the last parallel to Greek mythology in season 1...

4. Cheyenne Jackson

He plays Hades in Descendants 3, a Disney movie, meaning he’s the same Hades as in Hercules. 

Caleb Covington, you could argue is the “king of the dead” in JATP

That’s it, that’s the parallel.

Possible Season 2 Storylines

Cephalus and Procris (I’m not as familiar with this myth, but it basically goes like this)

Cephalus and Procris are happily married and very in love with each other. One day, the goddess of dawn, Eos, kidnaps Cephalus because she wants him to herself. Depending on the version you read, Cephalus either sleeps with Eos, or he doesn’t, but regardless, his only concern is how much he loves his wife, Procris. Eos finds that annoying, and plants the idea in his head that Procris is cheating on him when she releases him eight years later. Cephalus returns to Procris, disguised as another man, to see if she would remain faithful. A disguised Cephalus continuously brings Procris presents, and slowly, Procris is swayed by the mysterious man. When Cephalus reveals himself, Procris runs away, ashamed, and joins Artemis’ hunt. Eos wins essentially. She get’s Cephalus... until Procris returns, trying to make amends with her husband. He takes her back, but not long after Procris hears rumors that Cephalus has been unfaithful. She follows him on a hunt, hiding behind a bush. Cephalus hears a bush move, and thinking it’s an animal, he shoots, killing Procris. In the end, Eos still wins as Procris is no longer in the picture, and she could theoretically be with him. Expect Cephalus exiles himself and Eos is never seen again.

How could this apply to JATP season 2?

Julie = Procris

Luke = Cephalus

Caleb = Eos

Caleb-Possessed-Nick = Disguised man

Since Caleb possessed Nick at the end, I assume his plan is to get Julie to pick Nick, thus pushing Luke away from her. Caleb wants Luke and the boys to himself, and as long as Julie is in the picture, that won’t happen. As Caleb-Possessed-Nick tries to flirt and get closer to Julie, Luke will see this and get jealous. His jealousness could lead to tensions between Julie and Luke, making the band a bit awkward, maybe even a big fight that pushes Luke to think about joining Caleb, or at least isolating himself where Caleb would have easy access. I think it would be a very loosely applied parallel, but the idea of Caleb working to cause a rift between Luke and Julie to get Luke by himself is a major possibility. Regardless, Caleb-Possessed-Nick is going to get in the way of Luke and Julie’s slow burn pining for each other. 

A General Thought Not Related to Greek Mythology 

Regardless of what the writers end up doing, I think Caleb’s best plan would be to target the boys individually; like the continuance of the Hercules parallel with Willex and potential Cephalus & Procris parallel with Juke. I don’t know how he would isolate Reggie, maybe something with his family, but targeting the boys one-on-one would be the most strategic move for Caleb. He could even get super manipulative with it. He could say something like “Alex already agreed” or something along those lines to try to persuade the boy he is talking to. 

Additionally, I don’t have any theories on where Carrie and Julie’s relationship may go, but i’m looking forward to a Carrie redemption arc. As far as where Bobby fits in, I read someone’s theory that Caleb may approach him, offering to help keep his reputation as Trevor Wilson, if he helps deal with the boys somehow. I’m sure there’s a potential greek myth that fits a potential Bobby and the boys storyline, but out of the ones I can think of right now, there aren’t. Betrayal is a huge theme in greek mythology though.

Anyway...

While the original target audience was kids and the show probably wasn’t meant to be this deep, as a screenwriter myself, I find it super useful (and fun) to parallel classic stories and myths when I write. It can add a sense of nuance to the story, especially when done right. I hope the writers (assuming at least the Orpheus and Lotus Eaters parallels were intentional) continue to parallel the season with some form of myth or classic story, only to then completely flip the ending. 

If you actually took the time to read ALL of this, my god, I applaud you, you amazing human. Thank you so much for reading it. I’d love to hear what y’all think or what theories y’all have as well!