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#to a point where i fear i won't be able to get up from
a-b-riddle · 5 hours
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Runaway Love (kidnapper Price x captive reader)
cw: established kidnapping, violence, intimidation, unplanned pregnancy, miscommunicated threat of forced abortion, eventual Stockholm syndrome, housewife kink. Reader just accepts her situation at this point. Dub-con, non-con.
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You couldn't think of anything except the pain that radiated with each step toward your room. You were lucky your work and home were the same place. It was incomprehensible, downright unbelievable how some of the other maids worked their shift and then either walked home or walked to the bus stop.
Granted, most of them weren't pregnant and had shoes that actually fit, but you didn't like to complain. You were lucky to have the job, even if it was back breaking. You had a roof over your head and although the pay was minimal, you were able to buy essentials and save up and with a baby on the way every penny saved counted.
Most importantly, you were free. You were safe and so was the baby. It had been the only reason that after almost a year, you had finally been brave enough to escape. Knowing that it would be hard to rebuild a life from scratch. Knowing that the consequences meant a punishment so severe you could only hope for death.
You had tracked your period religiously. Even with the stress of being held captive by a psycho military Captain, your cycles were fairly normal. So when you were five days off, you knew. In a moment in which you wanted nothing more than to be happy to finally be starting the family you dreamed about having as a little girl, fear enveloped you.
John had never mentioned kids. Only a wife. Someone to be at home waiting for him. Keeping the house in order and his bed warm while he was away.
All I need is you and the boys, Birdie. What more could a man want?
You considered telling him. Hoping that he would be as happy as you wanted to be. Yet anytime you came close to telling him over the next two weeks, horrible thoughts raced through your mind. What if he was angry? What if he blamed you even though he practically took you whenever he pleased? How would he terminate the pregnancy or would he be content in letting you give birth without any medical intervention and simply get rid of the baby after?
Would he just get rid of you altogether?
It was like the universe was telling you to run when shortly after you decided that telling him wasn't the answer, that he told you he was going on a mission. Won't be back for a couple of weeks. Sent the boys to pick up anything you'll need. I know you'll be good for me.
You had been good. For that last six months, you had behaved. Didn't pull away from his touch or put up a fuss. You lived in the epitome of domestic bliss, so John had no reason to send you down to the basement. Not when you had so many opportunities to try to escape and you didn't.
Granted, he had threatened to break your legs during your first and last stunt. You had been in the basement for three weeks. Living in near darkness as he brought all of your meals. You had been upstairs for about twenty minutes and barely made it to the door before he tackled you. Pinning you to the ground, breath hot against the back of your neck as he hissed in your ear. Ungrateful little brat.
Your apologies fell on deaf ears as he hauled you back down where you would stay for six weeks.
For months you built the relationship on a lie. A lie John deluded himself into believing. Anytime he told you he loved you, you repeated the words back. Wanting to scrub your body raw anytime he touched you and hating yourself anytime he made you come.
But it had been worth it. You were four months along, and given your ill-fitted clothes, not really showing, but knowing that in another five months you would be holding the baby you always wanted. A baby that you had went through hell for. Seeing his or her face for the first time, being their mom would be worth it.
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You kept all of the lights off. It was a request of the motel owners to reduce their bills. So even if it was early December and you knew you would be walking back to a freezing room, they didn't give a shit. In truth, they were doing you a favor only charging you $400 in rent with unlimited access to their laundry services. You suppose having the pity of others did have its perks.
You hadn't even bothered to turn on the lights before pulling your shoes off your feet and plopping down on the bed. The grit and grim still felt thick on your skin, but you couldn't find the energy to care. You would shower and get on a fresh set of clothes you had gotten from the shelter when you first made it into the city, but for now you needed a moment. Just a few minutes to decompress.
A few minutes turned into five and then ten. Before you knew it, you had been laying in the bed floating in and out of consciousness for almost twenty minutes. You knew you needed to get up. Wash away the grime of the day that had settled on your skin. Your clothes smelling faintly of bleach.
Fuck you were tired.
You were always tired.
You got up and made your way to the bathroom, barely keeping your eyes opened. Not confident enough you would actually be able to take a shower without wanting to lay down in the tub and let all the strain of the day go down the train.
It's funny how the human body can make us teeter on the edge of sleep. We imagine things that may or not be there. But when you heard it, when you heard that voice coming from the corner of you room, you knew you weren't imagining anything.
"Wonderin' when you'd wake up."
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lenteur · 11 months
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i am so tired
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byuntrash101 · 3 months
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there's nothing boyfriend!chris loves more than to fuck with your head. he enjoys mind fucking you.
he loves to see you lose yourself to him. submit entirely mind, body and soul.
when he holds you flush against his broad chest he looks into your eyes that aren't looking back, fixed into nothing, barely hanging to consciousness.
he fucks you deep and slow. the perfect pace to keep you right where he wants you: on the edge of it all.
“that's it baby. you take me so well” he whispers, lips pressed to the shell of your ear as he tilts your chin up gently. your eyes come back into focus as you let a little sound escape your lips. halfway between a moan and a whine.
“‘you're being so good for me, my angel” he says, smiling down at you. you whine again and chris starts to speed up, your whole body feels so hot, steadily getting closer to its breaking point. 
“‘you're gonna continue to be my good girl, right? he says, this time the benevolent smiles turns into a sly smirk. but chris can't help it, not when he’s got you like this: pliant, docile and on the verge of insanity. 
“yesss” you moan, interspersed by chris’ sharp thrusts.
“what don't good girls do, my love?” he taunts you. he can't help but tease you when he's got you so fucked out.
“good girls don't cum” you say, feeling your exhausted little cunt clench around chris’ big cock perfectly stroking your sensitive spot. he knows at this angle it's almost a guarantee you won't be able to hold it back. the first big tear spill from your eye and rolls on you cheek as you can't help but to moan louder for him. only for him.
“please” you choke on a sob with a particularly purposeful thrust.
“what is it, darling?” 
“please slow down I'm gonna c-” one other powerful thrust cuts you and you arch your back into the mattress, your pussy gushes out more slick and really clamps down on chris’ fat cock inside you scraping you just right, just how you like it. this time you managed to hold it in but you start to panic. next time won't be like this. “please chris…aaahh… pleaseplease slow down-” you start to beg. 
fuck how fucking beautiful you look like this on the verge of madness, fear pooling in your eyes, spirit brittle and body broken.
“please, i-i don't want to cum”
there it is. chris twitches inside you as you utter the words. you both know there's nothing you desire more in the entire universe right now. your cheeks flooded with tears, your pussy making squelching wet noises with each of your boyfriend’s coming and going, your thighs trembling and your eager little clit throbbing. your whole body is desperate for the release. your whole being is aching for your orgasm. you both know that. and the fact that you’re saying otherwise just shows how dedicated you are to him.
you are perfect. so fucking perfect chris could have cummed right there. but he didn't instead he took one hand to place on your throbbing clit.
“then don't, baby” he murmurs as he starts to tease it in tight, fast circles. making you complain. “then don't fucking cum, angel”
he starts plowing his fat angry cock into you, fucking you into the mastress, pinning your legs wide open for him with a bruising grip and rubbing your clit. he sets you up for failure. he loves to see you fail to hold it in. he loves to see you cry, to hear you scream, to watch you fall apart. 
he loves to break you. just to put you back together right after.
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orbitsaturn · 13 days
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"I order you to date my servant!"
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─ in which a rambling lizard ("dragon") plans to use you for his self-proclaimed "world domination"
"once you get kinich to be all mushy and soft I'll be able to take over the world!"
kinich x reader
friends to lovers (idiots in love)
2.1k words
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k'uhul ajaw is a "mighty" and "feared" dragon, but one thing is hindering him from world domination.
it's his servant kinich!
but the fearsome ajaw has a perfect plan to make him kick the bucket. it's to utilize that one human that's been making him act up so much.
ajaw can vividly remember what's been happening the past few months. how his contractor has been staring off into space ever so often. how he seems to talk you more compared to other people. how he always lets his gaze linger on your form before you bid goodbye to him.
k'uhul ajaw has a hunch that his servant is lovesick.
and he'll use that perfect opportunity to finally make that arrogant human pay!
but the problem is, he can only come into contact with you when your near kinich since he can't stray far from his contractor.. well that's easier said than done since you guys have been "accidentally" been bumping into each other all the time. kinich is soooooo obvious about his feelings towards you ajaw finds it unbelievable that you haven't noticed yet! he almost feels bad for kinich. why can't you notice how lovestruck his servant is?! as ajaw is stuck in his thoughts a familiar voice calls out from a distance, one he can distinctly recognize.
"hi kinich! hi ajaw!" the voice, which came from you instantly made ajaw whip his head to his servant. archons, he can already see hearts in the fool's eyes.
"good morning." greeted kinich, he walked over to you and that's when k'uhul ajaw was going to put his plan into action.
"psst... psst... human..." ajaw quietly whispered to you, evoking a strange look from kinich. noticing kinich's suspicious look ajaw rushes to you. "look, i need your help. you'll be honored to help the great dragon k'uhul ajaw, yes? make kinich all mushy an-"
"GWAAK" ajaw is suddenly lunged backwards by kinich, his tail spiking up, face turning red.
"what do you think you're doing?" kinich eyes the little dragon suspiciously, "sorry if he said anything weird," he sends you an apologetic look before turning back to ajaw again. "now tell me, what did you tell them? i won't hesitate in putting you into time-out again." the yellow dragon quickly interjected, "NO! i never even said anything weird! and plus you never hesitate in putting me into time-out so i know that's a lie!" ajaw growls at kinich before quickly looking over to you.
catching ajaw's look you devised a plan to get a conversation with the small dragon without kinich getting suspicious, "yeah! ajaw didn't say anything bad. oh! are those grain fruit over there?" you point to the patch of grain fruit growing at a reasonable distance away from where you're currently at.
"oh? i'll get some for you if you want." kinich looks over to you, waiting for your approval.
"sure! we can share once you get a good amount!" you flash him a smile, "okay then," he gives you a gentle smile back before heading over to the patch of grainfruit. after the coast was clear you quickly turned to ajaw, giving him a confused look.
"so... what do you mean make kinich all mushy?"
"it's exactly what it means!" ajaw yells in annoyance, "he gets all mushy, his ears turn red, and he-" you quickly interject him, as you exclaim in surprise, "you mean i make him sick?!" you looked at the little lizard (dragon) worriedly. you figured he only talked to you out of obligation, but you didn't think he'd be sick of your presence! was he faking his kindness towards you the whole time?! then shouldn't you just start staying out of his way..?
no!
you always felt comfortable talking to him, you like (as a friend of course...) him for archons sake!!
"yes! you make him so (love) sick! how come you didn't notice yet?!" ajaw says, sighing in exasperation. geez, throughout every century humans seem to act the same, being stupidly in love. "anyways, I have a plan that'll help the both of us," ajaw looks at you with fierce determination, "I need you to be by his side as much as you can!"
huh?
"wouldn't that make him sicker of me?!" gasping, you look at the dragon in shock. if kinich already felt sick seeing you, why would you try to be near him all the time?! it's like basically saying 'im so annoying the only way to get rid of me is kicking me'
"that's the point! I need you to make him so mushy over you that when his guard is eventually down I can strike him down and initiate my plans for world domination!!" the little dragon laughs menacingly.
"err... and why do i need to comply with you?" you look at ajaw confused, "don't you like kinich? if you follow my plan it'll eventually get you two together!!" the little dragon looks at you, annoyed. "why should i trust you?! and what do you mean i like kinich??" you remark, eyeing ajaw suspiciously.
"you obviously like kinich! this'll help you both!" he starts outright screaming, turning red in frustration. you stare at him confused, you do like kinich, you wanna be with him all the time, but didn't kinich like you too? like as a friend of course!
but what does ajaw mean by making him all "mushy???" like... do you just... turn him into slime?
after much thinking of ajaw's words you feel a spark in your head.
wait, like mushy in the way you can't think of anyone but them?? like you can only focus on a person despite everything happening around you?? was that it?
a scream breaks you out of your thoughts.
"AAACCKKKK!!"
you look over your left and see kinich with a handful of grain fruit. your heart skips a beat.
huh? your heart skipped a beat?
focus!
you look at him, suddenly self-aware of everything around you. geez, why do you suddenly feel sweat forming on your hands?? why does he look extra shinier today?!
"are you okay?" he looks at you concerned. the gentle tone of his voice startling you out of your daze. you make eye contact with him, his amber-green eyes focusing on you intently. "yeah," you look away nervously, cursing yourself for acting nervous for no reason, "i'm okay," giving him a smile to reassure him.
"look, i know you're faking. are you sick?" he walks closer to you, "may i?" he hovers his hand over your forehead, and you can only hum and nod in response.
your heart kept beating quickly, did your heart always beat like this around him before? why were you suddenly so self aware of him when ajaw said that you liked him?!
as he gets your approval, his hand brushes the hair away from your face. your senses going into overdrive by the stimulation.
his face leans in closer.
you suddenly panic, closing your eyes.
wait are you even panicking?!
the sight of nothing leaves your senses heightened, you suddenly feel the humidity of natlan's weather, his hand against your cheek, the smell of his clothes permeating your senses, and the brushing of his hair against your face. you feel a sensation on your forehead, opening your eyes slowly you're instantly met with green and yellow hues, the shades of kinich's eyes leaving you mesmerized. his eyes have always been the focal point of his features, the way his eyes were akin to luscious greenery, and how his pupils were shaped like diamonds. they were beautiful. as you were staring at his eyes in a daze you were snapped out of your thoughts, as kinich mutters, you notice a look of concern painting his features, "your forehead's hot, are you sure you're okay?" his face dangerously close to yours.
"i-i am! it's just it's been hot lately!!" you exclaim, fanning your face, trying hard not to look away from kinich. yet, he doesn't buy your excuse, "eat this for now," he shoves a piece of grainfruit in your mouth.
"i'll walk you home." he sticks his hand towards you. "thank you..." you grab his hand, failing to notice the yellow dragon behind you, "i said make kinich mushy, not you." ajaw whispers menacingly behind you, while you glare at him.
what did he mean you're getting mushy?!
and since when did you ever agree to his proclamation??
turning your attention back to kinich, you notice he's still holding your hand. causing him to cough awkwardly and apologize.
"sorry." he lets go, awkwardly scratching the back of his head, "oh, it's okay!" you exclaim, quickly grabbing hold of his hand again. he gives you a small look of surprise before intertwining his fingers with you, causing ajaw to burst out laughing.
"HAHAHAHA!! you loveb-" as the small dragon gloats over his success the snap of kinich's fingers causes him to disappear.
thank goodness! wait.
did you just grab kinich's hand?! you were holding hands with kinich. do friends hold hands while feeling nervous about them?? no they don't... but what if some do?! do friends do this..?
as he walks you to your house you engage in small talk with him. but the topic of ajaw's deal that he made.
"he said he wanted me to make you all mushy, told me how your ears supposedly turn 'red' ." you recall ajaw's words to kinich, "oh, i see. don't mind him." his hand twitches, triggering you to look up at him.
what met your eyes shocked you.
his ears were red. his free hand covering his face, a tinge of pink painting his cheeks. is this what ajaw meant by mushy?
he's cute.
friends don't feel 'mushiness' around each other. people experience that when they like one another.
you like kinich, and you were burying your feelings in fear of ruining your relationship with him, but witnessing his reaction towards you firsthand gave you the push of confidence you needed to stop the denial in your heart.
you tug on his hand, "wait, kinich."
he turns to face you, the look of fondness in his eyes evident after you realize his feelings. "kinich, can we go to the mountain where we first met?" you look at him, hands slightly trembling. "are you sure? I don't want you to exert yourself too much if you're sick," his hand tightens.
you smile, "don't worry I'm not sick!"
──
you met kinich after he accepted your commission. you knew the people from the scions of canopy were adept with harsh terrain, so you were relieved when kinich accepted your commission.
your commission was simple, it was obtaining various herbs that grow in the sides of mountains, but you did offer a high mora award to anyone who accepted it!
"here you go." kinich hands over a basket full of herbs to you, "thank you so much!" you exclaim, smiling at him.
and now you're back on the same mountain again but for a different reason.
"the breeze here feels so nice!" you run around swinging your arms out, "kinich come here!" you motion him to get closer to you, which he immediately complies with.
you take in a deep breath.
this was it.
it was now or never.
"kinich i have something to tell you." you look at him, your voice trembling, "look, i've liked you for a while, i just realized recently, i don't want to make you uncomfortable so we can still be friends-"
"no." kinich interjects, grabbing your hand.
your eyes widen.
"i like you too." he says, his ears red, "so," he brings your hand to his lips, "i want to be with you," he says before pressing a kiss on the back of your hand.
without the both of you realizing, ajaw was out of timeout, the first person he spotted being you, realizing the opportunity he quickly yells, pointing at you,
"puny human! i order you to date my servant!"
but what he didn't notice was the flustered expression on you, along with kinich's glare directed towards him. realizing his mistake ajaw panics, "w-wait!! i didn't mean to-" the little dragon was cut off as he was sent to time out once again.
after the disturbance was gonekinich turns to face you, his hand still holding yours, "well," he gives you an amused smile, "i guess this was the first time i agreed with ajaw's commands." in response you smile back at him.
"i guess we should thank him when he's out of timeout!" you laugh before intertwining your fingers with his.
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sorry for late post anatomy is kicking my ass rn _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):_
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hyuuukais · 4 months
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heyllo :3
can i request reader x chan? reader is overwhelmed but keeps it in because that’s what they see chan doing a lot of the time. but eventually it builds to a breaking point where the stress causes them to completely shut down. chan doesn’t know exactly what’s wrong so it might be cute if he just sits on the floor in front of reader and plays clips from a song he’s working on and asks for their opinion (by basically talking out loud to himself) and then after reader calms down they are able to verbalize they just need a human weighted blanket and to be told they are doing amazing and their efforts are not going unnoticed.
im fine. 🥲
just hold me, tell me you love me
pairing : chan x reader
notes : me vs the long title. anyway thank uuu for being my first request! i hope this lives up to ur expectations and can provide u some comfort 🫶 sending u hugs and love 🫂💙 sorry it's taken a bit long to get back to! kind of was getting this feeling myself and have been unable to write, but i think i'm getting back
warnings : reader is overwhelmed, mentions of anxiety, fear of opening up to someone, reader is called pet names (love, baby), reader breaks down
wc : 1.4k
All week there's been a growing pressure in your chest threatening to spill all over the floor and leave you a mess, lying on the ground with nothing else to give. Give, you've given all you can, and now that you're home, you can't do it anymore. You seek peace in the quiet of your shared bedroom, your boyfriend still at work in his studio.
Your boyfriend, who works hard day and night. Your boyfriend, who's loving and caring and sweet. Your boyfriend, who you're scared to open up to when things get really hard, because he doesn't share with you either. Although the relationship isn't fresh, going on a year and a half, there are still things you don't talk about. You don't want to burden him with your struggles when you've always been able to power through by yourself.
Fisting the sheets under you, you can feel the need to cry in your body, the hollow feeling in your chest and the tightness in your throat, but nothing comes. It's like your body knows you're too tired for even that simple of an action, for even one tear to slip. So instead, you sit the the blanket over you, face peeking out to stare at the wall with tired eyes. You can't sleep. If you close your eyes, you know you won't drift off and wake up feeling better, you'll just lie there for hours.
"Baby?"
Something spikes in you when you hear Chans voice ring out through the apartment, curling into yourself more. He shouldn't be home this early and yet, here he is, calling your name and wondering where you are; you're never in bed this early. Chan continues to call out for you until you hear the bedroom door opening quietly.
"Love?" Chans footsteps get closer, and you can feel the edge of the bed dip with his weight as he sits down. "My love..."
His hand brushes over your shoulder, but you can't face him. When you bring the blanket over your head more, he seems to get the hint, shifting to lean against the headboard next to the statue that is your body, unmoving and heavy. You can feel him fiddling beside you, and soon, a soft melody fills your ears. It's enough to distract you temporarily from the raging storm in your head, focusing on the beats, and when Chans voice comes through, it's like you can feel a sense of comfort washing over you. Although it's not enough to completely take these feelings away, you're grateful for what he's doing.
"This song has been giving me trouble," Chan comments over the music, sighing heavily. "I can't figure out if I like the chorus or not, and it feels like it's missing something in general, but I don't know what. What do you think, baby?"
Unable to answer verbally, but still wanting him to know you're listening, you roll around so you're facing him. He chuckles as you bury your face under his thigh when you see he's sitting cross-legged, the pressure on your face oddly comforting. Chan places a hand on your back, his arm resting behind your head as he rubs small circles over your thick layer of blanket. Another song starts playing after a while, another soft one, too. You relax under his touch, feeling the vibrations through his body as he hums along to this one and makes occasional comments about changes he'd like to make.
Exhaustion hits you like a ton of bricks, your eyes fluttering shut as he keep playing different songs and telling you all about them. Both of you are aware that he shouldn't be playing so much unreleased music, but all Chan cares about in this moment is you, helping you, calming you, loving you. The company will never know anyway.
"Chan," You whisper, voice barely audible. His humming stops and he pauses the music, looking down at your limp form with furrowed brows. Moving your head slightly, you're able to look up at him on an angle, the cool air of the bedroom breaching your blanket cocoon.
"What is it, baby?" Chan moves some hair from your face, leaving this palm to rest on your cheek.
"Can you just-" You clear your throat, one hand coming up to play with the hem of his shorts at his knee to calm you more. "Just hold me, tell me you love me?"
Without words, he shifts down to your level and nods. Carefully, Chan guides you to face away from him and brings you close to his body, your back pressed tightly against his chest. His chin rests on your shoulder, now enveloped inside your blanket as he holds onto you tightly, scared that if he let's go, you'll fade away. The thought of you being in so much pain, whether physical or emotional, is something he can't bear; he can't sit on the sidelines and watch you wither away. Neither of you speak as you lie there for what feels like hours, although it must only be a few minutes. The feeling of Chan's breath on your neck is oddly comforting, your own hands finding his arm around your waist and holding onto him.
Something about the way Chan is holding you, comforting you without the pressure of being asked what's wrong, has you finally breaking down. It starts small, holding back a few tears, but a few escaping despite your efforts. Then Chan shifts closer, pressing soft lips on the skin behind your ear.
"I love you, you know that? So, so much," He whispers, inhaling the scent of your shampoo as he buries his face into your hair. "You're doing amazing, baby, and I mean that. I thought... I thought something might have been wrong, but I didn't know how to go about this. I'm sorry it got to this point, I should have asked. I want you to know you can always turn to me, okay?"
His words have the dam breaking and soon enough, the sobs ripping from your chest have you gasping and hiccupping like there's no tomorrow. You don't register the way Chan tries to soothe you as he pulls you around and into his chest. Subconsciously, you wrap your arms around his shoulders and roll his body onto yours, his head sitting in the crook of your neck. The weight feels nice, grounding, and you can finally hear Chan speaking again.
"Shhh, it's okay, you're okay." Chan whispers into the skin of your neck, one of his hands smoothing back your hair. "You're okay, I'm here, now breathe, alright? Breathe, baby."
He inhales deeply, and you do your best to mimic his movements. It's shaky, but you're doing it.
"Good job, you're doing great," Chan keeps his voice low as he speaks. "Keep breathing."
It gets to the point where you don't need to think about breathing anymore, your head throbbing slightly from the sudden outburst of emotion. Chan's body stays on yours, but he props himself up enough to look at you, his palm on your cheek and his thumb wiping away any remaining tears. You can barely look him in the eye.
All he does is stare at you with those pretty, dark eyes, but you realize there's a dampness under them matching yours. You open your mouth to question it, but he shakes his head, a soft smile on his face.
"I don't want you to be in pain alone ever again." His thumb continues to caress your cheek, even though the tears have dried. "I love you too much to let you go through that. Whatever's going on, tell me when you're ready, yeah? For now, just let me gush about my beautiful partner until they're feeling better."
You can't help the small laugh that escapes you as Chan surges up to pepper your face in kisses, saying praises in between each one. With every kiss, you can feel your face heating up until you try and cover it, but he just grabs your wrists and pulls your hands away. Eventually, he slows down, pressing one last kiss directly on your lips, and settles back onto you.
"Let's stay like this for a while," Chan suggests, knowing you need it, but so does he. "My favourite place is in your arms."
-
─── taglist : @chaeryred @toplinelix @channie-143 @staysinbloom
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darthfighter · 3 months
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it’s you.. isn’t it?
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Chapter Two of Your Shadow Series
warnings: violence, tension, & sexual tension if you squint 🫣
summary: since the encounter with the stranger, you stay on edge while trying to heal your wound from the night before. but it seems as though the man you met the day before can help you?
word count: 2.7k
authors note: part two is here!! i’m so excited to continue this series :) i have so many ideas for it. lots of hcs. future chapters will have smut in it don’t worry, just need to build development first.
part one here
Back against your bed, bottom numb from sitting for so long, and hands shaking on your lap. You have been alert since your encounter with this Stranger. You anxiously have been waiting for their return, but it has yet to come in the past fourteen hours. Meaning you haven't slept a wink this whole night. Now, it being morning, your stomach ached for food while your left arm throbbed in pain.
Your arm was still unhealed. Frustration was an understatement on how you were feeling. To be able to use the force, but only for a short amount of time due to your lack of experience with it lately, made you angry to no end. Healing your arm with your force wasn’t an option. Although that didn’t stop you repeatedly trying every thirty minutes. But no matter what, your arm was injured.
You could feel your anger burning in your chest. Never could you run away from your past no matter how much you stomp your feet. Healing never brought you any comfort even though that is its purpose. Flashes of your memory play in your mind as you are in your most vulnerable state. You remember your brother, laid on his bed in the room you both grew up in. His clothes are ragged and dirty and his hands calloused while he has oil under his fingers. He’s tired. But there you are. Young and in your clean Jedi robes. You tower over him in the bed feeling the sting in your heart like he personally dipped his hand through your skin, to your muscles, through your ribs, and tightened his grip on your heart. Your young hand hovers over him, shaking, while your brother laid, unmoving. You begin to heal him.
But here you are, older, hurt inside, and wounded outside. Incapable of healing yourself. You inhale through your teeth and hold your breath in anger. Hot tears leave your eyes. You know if you let yourself let go with your feelings, you won't be able to stop.
You take that as a signal to get off your ass to get something to eat and after your meal, you’ll find some medicine in town.
After your quick snack, you start to walk towards your small chest where you keep your credits. Thirty. Thirty credits is all you have. You haven’t been able to find a suitable job since moving to Olega, so you’ve been living off of your savings. You start to wonder what Maker forsaken place will even accept thirty credits for something to heal you. But looking for a place that will, is the only option you have.
You march outside your home, ready to scout the area.
Five places rejected your offer. Five places let you down. Five times have you almost broke down in disappointment. This took a toll on you. You have gotten to the point where you shuffle your feet through the dirt covered streets slowly. Feeling your motivation start to fade out of you. Your feet stop. You’re in the middle of the street, hungry yet again and still in pain. You start to contemplate if you should turn around and make your way home. Although that thought brought you fear at the mere chance of this Stranger returning once more.
A loud crash echoes through the street to your right. Your attention shifts to the sound to see the man you saw the day before in these streets. This time, he seems more lively than before. That being because he speaks before you do this time.
“Hello!”
You accept this greeting by walking towards him while holding your left arm with your right hand. Now, you stand before him in front of his shop. But before he can speak again, you ask a question. “Do you know a place nearby that has a reasonable price for medicine? Not too expensive.. I uh-” You finish the sentence by moving your hand to reveal your burn. The man responds with an over exaggerated wince.
“Actually..” The man walks back into his store while finishing his sentence inside “I have just the thing.” making the rest of his statement sound muffled.
You shake your head in amusement, but also feel the weight off your shoulders leaving knowing your mission to find medicine is now over.
Walking inside, you see all sorts of items. Gadgets, antiques, even weapons. Him rummaging through his cabinets and drawers is all you heard. While also listening to his quiet mumbling. “Just a second… I just had this.. damn thing..” His voice is low and smooth. The rummaging stops as he holds what he was looking for. He starts to walk towards you and motions you to sit on the counter.
“Right now? Shouldn’t I pay you first?”
“You can pay me after.”
“But you didn't say how much this is!”
“How many credits do you have?”
“Only thirty-”
“Perfect!”
He walks more towards you, you walk backwards and clash with the counter. Your heart begins to thump against your ribcage, and your nervous shaky hands hold you up so you can sit on the counter. Like he told you to.
He starts to make his way closer to you, positioning himself in front of you. Making this the closest he's ever gotten to you. His hand reaches your left arm, but before he rests his hand on it, he looks at you for approval. You nod your head softly and he gently touches your arm. He then pulls down your tear to give your injury more access to the bacta spray. Then, he sprays the bacta onto your arm making you flinch from the instant feeling it gives.
It felt cold. The cold that hurts.
You begin to slightly pull away from the spray and it makes him hold onto your arm tighter, to hold it in place. “Just for a bit more, I'm almost done.”
You swallow your pain while the man looks at your expression. As the spray scans your burn, he scans you with his eyes. You can feel his gaze on you, and you close your eyes to distract yourself.
“Alright. That should be all good now.”
He sets the bacta spray on the counter but his hand still lingers on your arm. Realizing this, you open your eyes to check in on your arm. He lets go and scans your whole arm this time. His eyes set on your hand.
“Looks like you already got one of these, huh?”
You pull down your sleeve in embarrassment. As well as the fact you don't want to explain to a random person that you got the scar in your padawan days.
“Thank you, for this. You have no idea how close I was to giving up. Everything is so expensive these days.” You lift your bottom off the counter to stand up. Now, you are close to the man and feel intimidation while also having a hint of curiosity in him.
You put your hand out for him to shake, and introduce yourself. His hand meets yours and you immediately feel something. It feels as though holding his hand felt like you were on the edge of a cliff. You feel energized. Your heart thumps against your chest. You look up to him and he has a certain look on his face. It’s like the one you saw before in the street.
“I’m Qimir.”
The best plan you can muster out of your head is to scout your own home on your neighbors roof. From this view you’ll be able to see the Stranger come inside your house. That is if they decide to come again tonight.
So here you are. With your black robes to help your disguise. Even though there were no people around you, you felt a bit silly on how paranoid you looked. Although you shut those feelings down remembering you are fearing for your life. You felt like it was justified at least a little bit.
Time passed and you started to feel yourself grow less alert. You scouted the area less and less, and let your blinks last a bit longer than you should’ve.
Then suddenly, it feels like time froze. One second you're tiredly looking at your home, and the next you are lighting your lightsaber on instinct. The instinct being the Stranger attacking you from behind with their own lightsaber. Immediately you block their attack and your lightsabers illuminate a bright light on the rooftop. The lights reflect off their helmet giving you a better view of them on this dark night.
You lift off the ground to get ready for your stance, but you start to feel your knees shake before you out of fear.
“Your tolerance has weakened.”
You feel offended by this, even though it is entirely true. You launch yourself towards them and sway your lightsaber. The two of you match each other's blocks, and swift your wrists together. Once you get an ounce of a break from your physical conflict, you observe them. The way they are walking, the way they’re tilting their head at you, and the way their voice stays smooth like they aren’t even fighting you.
“I sense so much pain. Suffering.” They force pull you close to them and you position your saber in front of you, which helps you block their attack. Now, the two of your lightsabers are crashing together inches away from both of your faces, they finish their sentence– “Anger. You just don't know where to put it.”
Fire then left your throat turning into a scream. You know this will bring attention to your neighbors and people around you, but you don't care. You put all of your frustration into your force push causing a distance between you two. You know they are right. They’ve been winding you up with their antagonizing that it’s making your blood boil, and it's clearly giving you more power to the force than before.
You start to huff from exhaustion but know you need to stay on track. You want this all to end. The taunting and the fear. Enduring another minute of fighting with whoever this person is and them reading your thoughts is too much to bear.
The masked Stranger lunged towards you, and the two of you duel together. You move your lightsaber to attack, to only have them raise their arm to block it causing your lightsaber to give out.
The panic sets in. They take a big step forward and sway their saber towards you, but you move out of the way just in time. You start to back away, and look down to your saber. It’s flickering with purple shining in and out.
“It’s easier to let it out. I can help you.”
“Get out-” Your lightsaber lights back up on its own and you form your stance before your strike. “-of my head!” Your feet stomp towards the stranger and the two of you crash together again. A block here. A clash there.
There is a moment in your duel where they are able to grab ahold of your arm, and headbut into your saber. Causing it to give out once again. In this moment, it’s the first time they’ve touched you. But there is something about their hand on your arm that feels familiar. You're on the edge again. You feel as though you're looking over on a cliff, feeling the adrenaline. The shop. The medicine. Qimir.
Your eyes squint towards their helmet as though you can see through it. This causes them to push you away from them. You can feel the panic radiate off of them.
Again, your lightsaber lights but you have it lowered to the side of you. You have given up fighting at this moment because all you want is an answer. The answer being if this person before you is Qimir.
With heavy breaths you say “It’s you.. isn’t it?”
They dont answer, but only slowly take slow steps towards you. You feel like the fighting is over and you start to let your guard down. Although your saber stays on. Now, the Stranger is in front of you. Tilting their head. But then, they sway their legs under yours to sweep you off your feet.
Your back stings at the immediate pain of hitting the floor. The Stranger then strikes you, and all you see is red. Until you force block their attack and hold their lightsaber in place. The saber vibrates in front of you and they are temporarily frozen. You needed to take advantage of it. You kick your foot against their shin and they fall to the floor. This time, you know their helmet causes your lightsaber to short circuit. So, you turn yours off and use the hilt of your saber to strike their helmet. You hit it three times until it crashes to the floor.
You bring your feet into a crouch to stand up. They do the same. Both of you stand up together, in sync.
“You..” You faintly say, like a whisper.
His face is still and precise. The same face you saw before, but it looks like you're looking at a different person.
“You feel it too, don't you?” His voice isn’t modulated this time. If anything, it feels more intimidating than before. You stay silent and frozen. “Mm. You don’t have to answer that. I know you do.”
“You know nothing about me.” You spit back.
“Don't let your fear blind you to what you feel.”
You stare into his eyes in the hopes to read him like he's reading you, but all you get is nothing. His door is locked and you can jerk the knob all you want, but it just won't open. He takes a step to you, you take a step back. And this happens until your heel hits the back of the roof, near the edge.
“You’ve been what I needed all this time, as you need me.”
His words make you stumble and you start to lose balance, but before you can fall backwards. Qimir reaches towards your wrist and holds you in place mid fall. He is touching the same arm he previously did. This time, he brushed his thumb over your scar on your hand. It brings shivers down your spine and your hair stands up. He gently pulls you forward to set you standing straight again.
The commotion to both of your fighting has brought attention to your neighbors, and you can see bright lights coming your way. Qimir doesn’t look behind him but knows they're coming with his statement.
“What’s keeping you here? They’re gonna find you. Question you. Take you in. Once they find out your ex Jedi.. Well.” He shakes his head side to side while puffing air out. “I don’t think you want that.”
He makes a good point. The last thing you want to do is have the Jedi back into your life, and question you as to why you left the order. Making you relive the painful reason you left all over again.
“Or.. you join me.” Silence fills the air as the tension grows with his offer. He speaks again. “You figure out how to make peace with your past and join me as we both live a life where Jedi don’t make all the rules.”
The rules. The words brought anger inside you. Qimir senses it and smirks. He knows he's convincing you. Your door is starting to crack, and he's easing his way in.
“UP THERE!!” A loud voice yells from below your building and it gives you a signal you need to make a decision fast.
The thought of staying behind while you deal with the situation that will come to you full of dread and anger makes your face scrunch of how much you don't want to deal with it. Then the thought of joining Qimir, who senses your feelings you’ve been suppressing for so long. As much as he frustrated you, you felt a sense of relief in finally being able to be seen in that way. As negative as it was. But that's what drew you to him. He’s no Jedi, that's for sure. Because if he was one, he’d treat you like some maniac for having such strong feelings of hatred and anger. You sense familiarity in Qimir. In some ways, you feel like you're looking in a mirror.
A mirror you wanted to keep looking into.
You nod your head yes, and he smiles to himself. Ready for what's to come.
read part three here !
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azrielslittleslut · 3 months
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The Frenzy (pt. 2)
Azriel x Fem!Reader
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Summary: Azriel and reader continue to explore their mating bond.
Warnings: smut, 18+, NSFW, fingering, edging, scratching, pet names, wing play (kind of), p in v, praise, slightly dom!Az
Word Count: 1.8k
part 1
a/n: i have at least one more part for this planned, but I am totally open to suggestions on what you guys wanna see in this fic!;)
Enjoy!
In your centuries of living, you had known some mated couples, and you had always heard tales of the intensity of the mating frenzy.
"You won't be able to get enough of them, your mate."
"You won't be able to stop. Even if you're sore and tired.."
"Your body demands more, more, more. It's like you're never satisfied."
You had always thought they were exaggerating. Surely, your body would reach a point to where food and rest would overcome your desire to have your mate inside of you.
Gods, you were wrong.
You had not gotten any sleep last night since you and Azriel had finally accepted the mating bond. You couldn't get enough of him. You craved more of his taste, his smell. You thought only of his hands on your body, his cock moving inside of you. Luckily, he met your relentless hunger with his own.
Insatiable is the only word to describe what you are feeling.
"How about a bath?" Az asked from where he was lying on top of your chest. You had just finished your tenth round of lovemaking. Or was it the eleventh? You didn't know. You lost track a while ago.
"Hmm," you murmur, running your fingers through his silky black hair. "That sounds nice." Your body was covered in dried sweat and cum, and you longed to be clean again.
Azriel gracefully slides from the bed, fighting through the tangled sheets. He grabs your ankles and pulls you after him. You laugh as he hauls you up, and you wrap your legs around his waist. He grips your ass in his hands as he walks towards the bathroom.
The bathroom was quite large, and the tub was conveniently big enough for two. The water was already running, thanks to the enchantment on the cabin. Through the large window in the bathroom, you can see the sun beginning to rise along the peaks of the mountains in the distance. It was still quite dark, though, so the cabin's magic also lit the candles lining the room, casting everything in a sultry glow.
"It seems you kept me up all night," you murmur to Az as he sets you gently into the water. You settle yourself against one of the benches along the side of the tub, and you let out a soft moan as the warm water eases the tinge of pain in your sore muscles. He had put you in positions you hadn't even realized were possible, but you weren't complaining.
Azriel chuckles as he gets in after you, making his way over to settle himself between your spread legs. He leans down and begins kissing your neck, sucking on your skin. His shadows swirl around him, and you giggle as you feel them tickle your face. "What can I say?" he asks, his voice low. "I crave you. You make me almost feral because of how much I need you."
You lean your head back against the edge of the tub to give him better access. "I didn't realize it would be like this," you admit. "I'm so tired and sore, but I want more."
Azriel pulls away and you can see his eyes darken with lust. It was a new look from him you had grown accustomed to over the last few hours. You had seen his eyes full of happiness, which caused the greens and browns in his hazel eyes to stand out. You had seem them full of sadness, and even fear.
But this look.. this look caused his eyes to turn almost black, and the sight of it lit a fire deep in your bones and caused your pussy to throb.
He smirks, and you find yourself staring at the way his luscious lips move. You remember the way those lips feel wrapped around your nipples, the way they felt against your slick folds.
You let out a soft moan and pull him closer, wrapping your legs around his waist in the process. The hot water from the bath felt cold compared to the heat dancing across your skin. The world narrowed down to only Azriel, and your unrelenting need for him.
He chuckles. "So needy for my cock, hm?" he teases, leaning down to bite on the tender spot between your neck and shoulder. "Let's see what we can do about that."
He swiftly moves back, pulling you with him as he settles on the bench across from yours. You sigh as you feel his hardness against your aching core, and you can't help yourself as you grind against him.
Azriel clicks his tongue and grabs your hips, stopping you in place. "None of that," he murmurs as he moves his hand down to run a finger through your pussy. "You think I haven't noticed how much you love my fingers in you?" He pushes his middle finger in slowly, watching in awe as your mouth drops open in pleasure as he begins to thrust.
Indeed, you loved his fingers inside of you. It was no secret that Az was insecure about his hands, although you had always found them beautiful. But like this, there were no insecurities to be found. He had quickly learned how to make you come apart with his hands alone, and holy shit was he good at it.
Suddenly, he stops his movements, and you hold back a cry of protest. With his free hand, he smacks your ass slightly, causing the water around you to ripple. "When I ask you a question, I expect an answer." The tone of his voice held no room for argument.
In the past few hours, you had realized your mate was a walking paradox. To everyone else, he was polite, kind, and gentle. Yes, he could be cruel and ruthless, but that was only when he was doing his job for the Night Court. But in the bedroom, he was a demanding male, and he had the tendency to withhold your pleasure if you didn't follow his orders.
You didn't mind. With him, you had no problem being told what to do. You loved the idea of him being in control. In fact, it turned you on like fucking crazy.
"Y-yes," you stutter, struggling to find words. "I love your fingers, your hands. You make me feel so good with them."
"Good girl." He begins to move his hand again, and he quickly adds another finger. "Has anyone else made you feel this good, princess?" he asks, leaning down to leave hickeys along your neck. "Tell me."
You shake your head, already beginning to feel your climax build. "No," you whisper.
Az slows down his hand, just enough to cause your pleasure to subside. "No what."
Smug bastard.
You offer him a sweet, innocent smile. "No, sir."
"There's those manners," he murmurs. He removes his hand, and you cry out at the sudden feeling of emptiness. He runs a soothing hand over your hip, moving it down to grasp his cock. "Take it. Take your pleasure, baby."
You wrap your hands around him, marveling at the fact that your fingertips don't touch. You hover over him just long enough for you to line him up with your pussy. In a quick move, you slam your hips down, seating him into the hilt.
"Fuck," he snarls, throwing his head back against the tub. "You take my cock so well, angel."
You begin to move, slamming yourself down over and over. You don't care about the fact that the water is splashing all over the floor. You are only focused on him, on the way his cock fits perfectly inside of you like it was made for you and you for him. You run your fingers over his chest, digging your nails in to leave marks across his Illyrian tattoos. "You fill me up so good. Nobody has ever made me feel like this, and nobody else will." You lean forward to trace your tongue across the skin of his neck, loving the feeling of his strained muscles. "You're perfect for me."
He moans at the praise coming from your lips, at the feeling of your tongue along his skin. He grips your hips in his hands as he begins to fuck you, meeting your thrusts with his own. Your eyes roll back as you feel him hitting that tender spot deep inside of you over and over again.
Through your mindless pleasure, you notice his wings have moved in slightly, wrapping themselves around you. You grip his face gently in your hand to get his attention. "Can I?" you ask quietly. You had never touched his wings, and you would understand if he wasn't ready for that yet.
His gaze softens as he realizes what you are asking. "Yes. Of course."
You smirk at him as you move your hands up. "Nothing crazy for now." In each hand, you grip his talons at the end of his wings. "My mate has made me tired and sore, so I could just use some leverage."
You hold his wings, keeping your eyes on Azriel as you keep moving, grinding your hips down so that your clit rubs against his pelvic bone. You feel his shadows begin to dance across your heated skin, running across your sensitive nipples.
"You're. So. Fucking. Beautiful," he roars, accentuating each word with a powerful thrust of his hips. "All mine. All mine." He says the words like a prayer, and you send up your own prayer to the Mother, thanking her for blessing you with such a wonderful mate.
The bathroom is filled with the sound of your combined moans, and the sinfulness of it causes your tether to snap. You scream as your climax slams into you, gripping his talons tightly.
"That's it, love," Azriel moans, fucking you through it. "Give me your pleasure." His eyes roll back into his head as you milk him. With a final deep thrust, Azriel follows you, filling you with ropes of his cum.
You gently release his wings, moving your hands down to cup his face. You run your thumbs across his high cheekbones, noting every freckle dusting the top of his nose. "I love you," you whisper.
He wraps his arms around you, pulling you closer. He nuzzles his face into your neck, breathing in your scent that is now mixed with his. "I love you more," he responds. He wraps his wings tightly around you, forming what looks like a cocoon.
The two of you had wasted so much time, so many years. Now, there would be no more wasted time. You would love him with all of your strength, and you knew he would love you with all of his. That new bond glows brightly within your chest, and you smile at the feeling of it.
Forever wouldn't be long enough to be with him, but every forever starts with a beginning.
This was only the beginning.
taglist: @lilah-asteria @ivy-34
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(Genshin Impact) Lisa, Eula, Yae, Shenhe, Chiori, Rosaria, Navia, and Furina's S/O feeling insecure
No one requested this, just writing away some blues tonight since I can't sleep. Totally unrelated, Just Give Me A Reason is a really good song.
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Lisa immediately noticed something was bothering S/O.
The way their hands fidgeted on the teacup, staring out into space with their brows creased.
(Lisa) "...S/O?"
She gently calls out to them, snapping them out of whatever they were thinking about as they blinked a few times in surprise.
(Lisa) "Is something the matter?"
S/O gave a smile, one she immediately knew was forced.
(S/O) "Ah, it's nothing.-"
Their expression vanished the moment they saw how concerned Lisa was getting. There was no point in lying to her, was it?
S/O sighed as their fingers resumed rapidly tapping against the side of the cup, struggling to look her in the eyes.
(S/O) "This is going to sound really dumb but...I've just been thinking lately. You...still love me right?""
Lisa's back straightens at their words, where was this going?
S/O shook their head in a slight panic as they realized how their words came across.
(S/O) "I-It's nothing you've done, I promise! I just...I'm just worried that I'm not good enough. And that...you'll leave me because of it."
Lisa for her part remains silent for a moment. Not because she didn't know what to say, it was the opposite.
She was just relieved that it wasn't something more serious. But regardless, Lisa's arms reach over the table and hover over their hands before gently squeezing them.
(Lisa) "S/O, you've always been perfect for me. Whatever thoughts you have right now, don't listen to them."
Her smile and soothing voice makes S/O thankfully relax, with them meeting her gaze.
(Lisa) "Of course I still love you. I always will."
Lisa gets up from her seat to embrace S/O, letting them take a second to let their emotions out.
(S/O) "Lisa-"
(Lisa) "It's okay. Take as long as you need."
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Eula is completely stunned when she hears S/O voice their thoughts.
Leave them?
Eula's mouth opens to immediately rebuke that, but quickly silences herself.
Truth be told, she felt that fear herself. The fact that S/O chose to love a Lawrence was a fact she still struggled to fully comprehend.
S/O was the first person to show her true love, and it felt like a knife to her heart to hear them think so little of themselves.
Instead, Eula's palm slowly caresses their cheek, letting their head rest into it.
And with a voice that grows softer by the second, she takes a deep breath and replies:
(Eula) "You mean more to me than anything I could ever say or do, S/O. Don't ever think that you're not good enough for me, because there's no one else I'd rather have."
(S/O) "...Thank you, Eula."
Once she sees that smile she loves, she gives one herself, not being able to help the teasing that follows up.
(Eula) "Remember, our feud is for the long-haul. Don't think that you can escape it that easily."
(Eula) "Hah, of course..."
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Yae exhales deeply, processing S/O's words as her ears uncharacteristically twitch for a split second.
A soft chuckle from Yae is the sound S/O hears, making them turn their gaze from the ground to her.
(Yae) "Frankly, I thought when you began that sentence, it would be far worse."
For once, there's no sign of a mischievous smile or anything resembling that she'd tease them.
Yae gives a soft kiss to their forehead before taking their head to rest on her chest in an intimate hug.
(Yae) "I certainly hope you'd know by now, S/O. If I didn't love you, I wouldn't be here right now."
(S/O) "...S-Sorry, Miko.-"
She cuts them off by squeezing them tighter, her voice still as affectionate.
(Yae) "Don't apologize. Just remember that even if you doubt yourself, that I won't."
S/O pulls away after a small eternity, with Yae's expression going back to normal.
(Yae) "Good, that's the face I like to see."
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Shenhe is terribly confused.
Why on earth would she ever leave without a good reason to?
(Shenhe) "You don't have to worry about something like that, S/O."
Abandon the person who made her feel human again, to feel love when she thought it was completely gone?
She would have to go completely insane to do that.
(S/O) "I-I know...It's not fair to you at all and-"
Shenhe instantly hugs them tightly, her face and voice not fluctuating all that much despite the strength that held S/O.
(Shenhe) "I am still struggling with emotions, but I know the feelings I have for you are real."
She's put at ease when S/O hugs her back. Thank the Archons she was saying her piece correctly.
(Shenhe) "I'm sorry that I have ever made you doubt me, but I love you, S/O."
(S/O) "I'm...I'm sorry I ever doubted you."
Neither of them move out of each other's arms for a long while.
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Chiori sighs before she speaks up in her usual stoic tone. Though this time, there's a hint of kindness in it.
(Chiori) "Well, you're right about sounding dumb."
...Wait, shit that's not what she meant-
(Chiori) "I mean, you know I'm not the type to beat around the bush. If I wanted to leave, I'd have done it. I'm still here, aren't I?"
...Chiori shakes her head, mostly at herself. Even at times like these, she still can't help her choice of words.
This time, she moves to give them a tight hug, wiping away the tears forming at the edge of their eyes.
Chiori feels their heartbeat, giving her time to think of a way to not sound like a bitch.
(Chiori) "Too direct right now, aren't I? Then how about this, my feelings for you haven't changed, and they won't."
She hears S/O give a small chuckle, making her a little more at ease.
(S/O) "You have such a way with words, Chiori."
(Chiori) "Remember, you chose me...And I chose you, S/O."
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Rosaria is silent, much of her actions mimicking S/O's.
She didn't look them in the eyes as she took her time, coming up with a response in her head.
Once she glanced at S/O and saw how uncomfortable they had become, she figured out what to say.
(S/O) "I shouldn't have brought this up, sorr-"
(Rosaria) "I'm glad you did, S/O...If anything, I feel like I haven't been there for you enough."
And she was proven right, seeing how they were tonight.
Rosaria hesitates before letting her hands hold S/O's, closing her eyes.
(Rosaria) "I know I'm not here a lot of nights to reassure you, and I know I'm really bad at this kinda stuff..."
Instead of saying anything, she gets up to kiss them, hoping that gets the message across.
(Rosaria) "...Don't worry about me leaving, that's not happening."
She makes it a mental note to come home sooner than usual now, if at the very least to wipe any tears S/O may have away.
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Navia thoughtfully listens to S/O's troubles.
Her expression is completely serious, not saying anything until they finished their sentence.
Her first instinct is to wrap her arms around them and tell them that it's okay, but she knew what they really needed.
(Navia) "S/O. I don't think I could imagine my life with anyone else. And I never want anyone but you."
Seeing them relax got her to do so as well, Navia leaning in to kiss the top of their hand.
(Navia) "Don't ever be afraid to tell me these kinds of things. I'll make sure that you won't think that way about yourself ever again."
Now, she allows herself to give them a bone-crushing hug, making her giggle.
(S/O) "Thank you, Navia..."
(Navia) "It's what your wonderful girlfriend is here for, right?"
To brighten their mood, she puts her hat on them, before tilting it down and giving a cheeky smile.
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Honestly? Furina completely understood the feeling, more than S/O could ever know.
She was so afraid that the people of Fontaine or that those closest to her would leave upon knowing what she was really like.
Centuries of feeling that she wasn't good enough for anyone ate away at her every night.
So to hear S/O voice the same words, thinking they weren't good enough for her?
The person who loved her despite everything? That broke her heart.
Furina's arms wrapped around their back before her head rested on their shoulders, hugging them tighter than she ever had before.
(Furina) "...Thank you for telling me, S/O."
She had no room to tell them that they shouldn't think this way about themselves. After all, she was still struggling with the very thing plaguing their mind.
(Furina) "I'll love you, no matter what you think. Because you'd do the same for me."
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headspace-hotel · 1 year
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facts about The Fear, after 20 years of life with her
The Fear is NOT:
an intruder, invader, or some other entity from "outside" You
inappropriate, wrong, or incorrect
a responsibility
a punishment
"irrational" or otherwise able to be understood through a relationship to "rationality"
an "inaccurate" representation of reality
The Fear IS:
an innate part of you
extra-rational—she exists outside and completely independent from "rationality" and does not respond to being judged according to that lens
self-love—her purpose is to protect you and keep you safe
self-sufficient—fear is a 100% whole, complete entity that doesn't "represent" or "reflect" something else
earnest—fear is always a 100% real experience that is exactly as it is felt, and, needing no comparison or reference to any external reality, it is not "dishonest" or "inaccurate"— it asserts a claim about only itself
subversive [not quite the word I am looking for but it will have to do]— is not necessarily beholden to social and cultural norms of what should be feared, how much, and how you should respond. She does not stop existing in the absence or suppression of vocabulary to describe her.
a demand for care— she does not just communicate to you but to the community you are part of; she calls attention to an obligation that this community has toward you, to make sure that you are safe within it and that your experiences are heard and understood.
yeah, so, i've had severe anxiety for my whole life and the way it's been treated and dealt with, and the way I've been taught to understand it, has really fucked me up so I am trying to lay the groundwork for understanding it differently
I think it's pretty fucked up that we're taught to see anxiety as deceptive or inaccurate. Now, obviously the images or projections in my fearful thoughts do not usually "reflect reality," but I have come to see this as...not particularly important?
Teaching an anxiety sufferer to restructure their thoughts to dismiss and contradict "irrational" fear is, in my opinion, the same as teaching a chronic pain sufferer to restructure their thoughts to dismiss and contradict pain with no clear physical source. You might as well speak of "irrational" pain, and pain has the same relationship to rationality that fear has.
"Irrationality" is a quality assigned to fear that is judged by an outside observer, or by the collective cultural biases and hang-ups of a society, as not appropriate to a given situation. This is total fucking nonsense and we should be talking about that, because...well, the first reason is that it implies some kind of fixed standard for what fear ultimately is and isn't for. i like to tell people to watch one of those Coyote Peterson videos where he's going to get a tarantula hawk wasp to sting him, because he's obviously having a strong physical fear response, even though he knows it won't kill him. Is it "rational" to fear suffering and not just death? How much suffering? Sit with that one a little while.
The second reason, which is even more convincing, is that the "rational" brain is not consulted at any point, ever, when a person feels afraid. It's just a response. The fear response is not routed through the conscious, sapient, reasoning brain. And thank God, because if we needed to hear back from an upstairs executive before we could decide whether to run from a lion, our species would be extinct.
Techniques like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy were absolute fucking shit at making my life any better, but fantastic at wrecking my ability to identify my own emotions, because Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for anxiety basically amounts to trying to brainwash yourself into thinking you don't feel the emotions that you do. It's a really neat way to develop bizarre psychosomatic symptoms and start experiencing anxiety through constant body pain, swollen lymph nodes, and digestive issues.
For an institution that pathologizes having "alters," psychiatry sure loves to encourage a suffering person to view normal and ultimately good parts of themselves as distinct, intruding entities to be shoved in a closet somewhere.
And yes. Fear is ultimately a good part of you, a part of you that loves you.
What began to set me free was feeling that acid terror and sickness and rage course through my body and realizing—really realizing—that I was being illuminated with this ancient, powerful force driving me to LIVE.
I want us to make it. I want you to live.
And you know what, I want me to live too.
I abandoned the doctrine of calming down—Lord knows it had never worked anyway—and started really just exploring and existing in the Fear.
How did that feel? Bad. Very very very very very bad and really not productive or helpful at all initially. Which was unavoidable. Necessary. She had been frantically clawing to communicate with me for so long, and I had been shutting her away, silencing her, resenting her presence in my psyche. I started trying to show gratitude toward the signals my body gave me. I started trying to show gratitude toward her—and i guess the Fear was a Her now, this just seemed more respectful.
And it seemed like nothing happened, but several things happened.
I stopped searching for validation. That was a big one. At some point I just...stopped needing a "reason" or justification for the fear I felt (trauma???? neurodivergence???? neurodivergence trauma????) and the fact that I experienced it became completely sufficient and satisfying to me. So much guilt and confusion disappeared.
I also became steadily more confident about my own boundaries, particularly in regards to recovery.
It's awful now that I think about it, but I think I felt this sense of almost moral obligation towards "recovery," as if I needed to "overcome fear" to be Courageous and Virtuous. It made me feel crushing guilt to feel any hesitation about this.
But then this started to change. It became more real to me that was the only person affected by the steps I did or didn't take toward recovery, and there was no moral dimension to it. A therapist couldn't put me in a box I wouldn't willingly go into.
Freedom from these judgmental frameworks is really important to me. I think that I always hated the idea of getting "better" because it seemed like "better" would mean just getting better at submitting to things I was afraid of while everything felt just as bad as it always did on the inside.
And on some level—even though I could never put it into words at the time—I violently hated the idea of "recovery" from some of my fears because it seemed like the ultimate denial of agency. I didn't want to "become okay with it"—the possibility felt dehumanizing. It felt awful.
And I realize now that this is because The Fear represented something I needed to have a right to. Many of my most life-destroying fears centered around things being done to my body, and if I could have pressed a button and been no longer afraid, I wouldn't have, even though it would have spared me so much suffering, because...I needed it to be okay to want agency over my body. I needed it to be right. The Fear, in this case, was a demand that my body be treated as sacred.
I realized that there were many cases where The Fear was a territorial claim of sorts, a demand that certain needs be honored and met—She needs this. This is FUCKING non-negotiable.
And it really...prompted me to look backward on my life and see The Fear differently: not as a responsibility I had failed to shoulder (me?? a little child??? responsible?? Responsible for being brave, when every day felt like facing a firing squad?????) but as a collective responsibility
Because I was not alone in those memories—I was surrounded by adults that saw me suffering, and often dismissed, ignored or ridiculed it. The Fear grew larger and larger; why?—to protect me. Because teachers, nurses, doctors, and camp counselors did not do any of the thousand thousand things they could have done to make that little girl feel safe. Because my well-meaning parents praised me when I was "brave" but I, a little kid, literally couldn't communicate how awful it always felt.
The Fear was not there to torture me. The Fear was and is doing her best to keep me safe. It's not wrong, there's no need for guilt. It just is.
It doesn't feel good. But maybe one day it will feel better.
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blughxreader · 1 year
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building off of this platonic yandere batfam headcanon where they're slaves to your moods and whims...
I also kind of enjoy the idea of batfam revering and fearing batsib. Not enough to lesson their control over you (or back off their affection in any way), but they want your love so badly / think you're a jewel among rubble / cling to your every thought... I can see them freezing up when they know they're about to make you mad, or when you give your opinion.
Tim's like, "*shaky sigh* hi... we need to upgrade the tracking chip in your neck :) itwasbruce'sidea." (his idea actually)
or they know your triggers by heart (mentioning your past family, your aspirations of travel, lost career goals, etc) and immediate silence falls over them as they wait for your reaction.
This works especially well for Darlings that withdraw into themselves. It's impossible to NEVER give a single opinion or extra explanation, so on the rare occasion when you divulge something about yourself, they're like oh god its happening JOT THAT DOWN
Dick is good at talking around your pointed silence, even if he gets nervous under your glare. He has stars in his eyes when you finally engage with him, even if it's only a sentence more than your usual "yes/no" responses.
Dick is unpredictable too because you never know where his limit is. It's fine, it's fine, it's fine, then he comes back from patrol with broken knuckles and the scariest look on his face because he couldn't take the stress anymore. The only one in the house who will match your anger (rarely happens, though), and he apologizes through actions, not words.
Jason, who always has some shitty remark to make, finds himself at a loss for words when you're not talking. You two sit with your arms crossed in silence and look sour for two hours, then he walks away thinking it was a relatively good visit.
He gets overwhelmed the easiest when you're mad. When you're in a bad mood, very slight disturbance in the house sets him off and he needs the rest of the day to cool off.
Tim has no clue how to handle you. He doesn't fit the reliable older brother role and he can't fool anyone with the doe-eyed baby brother act, so I think he'd take the "best friend sibling" approach.
He's always trying new ways to curry your favor, despite it occasionally pissing you off from how obvious his attempts are. Tim's the least likely to be deterred by your rejection, despite how deeply it hurts. He sulks in the shower for an hour then gets out to cause problems only he can solve.
Kind of like how Damian absorbed Dick and Bruce's moral code because it fit his end goal of being Batman, I feel he would do the same to you but for slightly different reasons.
Damian walks around like your mirror. He unconsciously mimics everything you do, absorbing your behaviors and speech like a sponge. An outsider wouldn't be able to see past his trained neutral expression, but on the inside he thinks you're so cool.
He also copies you as a coping mech in order to limit upsetting you, and gets VERY embarrassed when he says something that contradicts your feelings.
Bruce, ever the scapegoat, has resigned himself to the brunt of your anger. He can't weasel his way into your heart like the boys can, so he's the most transparent about his bonding efforts. His gifts and attention are steady and unrelenting, no matter the response.
I think he's the sweetest... He's definitely the best listener in the house, and genuinely wants nothing more than for you to be safe and happy. Yes he wants you to accept the child/sibling role, but he won't manipulate you to get there (unlike some of the boys). Your anger gives him stress, but he takes it in stride.
for more yandere batfam content, visit my masterlist!
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ooffmlsorry · 11 months
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One Piece Men Dealing with a Dangerously Reckless S/O
context: by dangerously reckless I mean someone who never has a second thought about throwing themselves in harms way and doesn't care what it does to them
t/w: passive suicidality, self harm? (better safe than sorry) angst. Mentions of blood, injury, and death
LAW
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It'd probably lead to a big argument where he threatens to kick you off his crew because losing you would legitimately be the death of him. He can't lose anymore people he loves to violence. When Bepo tells Law you didn't even hesitate to plunge into a thicket of razor wire to help your crew mates escape, it doesn't read as admirable to him. It reminds him too much of himself on Spider Miles. After he gets your side of the story, which pretty much confirms it, he doesn't talk to you at all while he cleans the mud and blood from your skin and stitches the slashes that cover you from head to toe. Normally, even if you've fallen asleep, he talks you through your treatment, but not after your stunts. He's that...scared? Angry? Distraught might be the right word. Every time you do something like this, he's speechless because his thoughts are racing with the reality of losing you. He feels sick to his stomach. On nights like these, he doesn't know whether to sleep far away from you or hold you so close to him you can't breathe.
LUFFY
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At first, Luffy doesn't care. He has the utmost faith in his crew, and they put themselves in harms way all the time! Getting injured is just being a pirate sometimes! That's pre-timeskip. Post-timeskip Luffy still has a lot of faith in his crew and a lot of faith in his ability to protect his crew, but he's...different. He believes things are always going to work out no matter what and if they don't he'll make them, but sometimes he wakes up in the middle of night and stares at you, tracing all the scars you've gotten from one fight or another. And then the what-ifs begin to creep in and the nightmares start. After literally diving into a sea king to retrieve Nami's log pose and Chopper has patched you up yet again, you wake up to Luffy calling out for you in his sleep, sweat dampening his hair and his face twisted in fear. You soothe and shush him until his breathing evens out, but he holds you tighter still. It's not in his nature to "bench you" or doubt your strength just because he's in love with you. That would be controlling and doubting you, and he would never do that. But that doesn't mean Zoro and Sanji don't take notice, even if Luffy won't say anything they make it extremely hard for you to pull off any careless "heroics."
ZORO
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Much like Luffy, Zoro doesn't think much of it for a while for the same reason. This is the guy that was completely ready to cut his own legs off, after all. But that doesn't mean it doesn't concern him, especially because you don't seem to have a rhyme or reason for all the shit you pull. And he would say something to you about it. Maybe not directly after you jumped straight into Marine gunfire to cover a little girl, he just wants you to be alive at that point. But after days of taking care of you as your wounds slowly heal, after he's certain you're not going anywhere this time, he'd make sure the two of you are somewhere alone and quiet to talk. As far as Zoro's concerned not going down without a fight is completely fine, dying for your dream isn't considered giving it up, but acting like it isn't a possibility is stupid. And he'd tell you as much. For most of this he wouldn't be able to look at you, just because if he does fear is going to take hold of him, but for that last bit he would. Zoro would search your eyes hoping you understand what he's saying. He'll tie you to the ship if he has to, he'd do anything if it saves you from being so stupid as to forfeit your dreams.
SABO
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Dying for the cause is par for the course. It's a grim reality that Sabo begrudgingly accepts, although he does have a bit of youthful naivety that it won't ever happen to anyone. He won't ever believe the revolution isn't worth it, but you do make him question it for the first time. He loves you so much he has to compare you to the whole world for a moment, and that's one of the worst thoughts he's ever had. Because the whole world still wins. The guilt would eat him alive until he blows up (somewhat literally) at you for drinking the last of a rare poison to keep it out of the enemy's hands. Angry tears roll down Sabo's cheeks. When he yells at you, he's shaking with anger and fear. It's not up to him, but he doesn't object when you're completely benched while you recover and for a little longer after that. It takes a while for him to no longer angry and scared out of his mind, but once he is he's back to himself. If can visit you every day he will. He has hope for the world's future, and hope for yours too. He's not leaving either behind.
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paradiseprincesss · 2 months
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dangerous woman | jonathan crane
i'm sure everyone is familiar with the album cover of "dangerous woman" and what she's wearing on it. if you don't, then i feel like the outfit and nickname won't make sense in this fic !!!
summary: you've been stealing the scarecrow's fear toxin for months, and finally, he catches you red handed.
warnings: smut, p in v, bondage, rough sex, general adult content lol, MDNI 18+ only
word count: 3.1k
masterlist
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you’d been stealing the scarecrow’s fear toxin for months now — and you knew it was only a matter of time before he found you. 
it was profitable, okay? you would steal his supply, leaving him empty handed, and selling it at a much higher price to the criminals of gotham city. easy money, light work. simply put, you were running him out of his own business. 
jonathan was growing increasingly more frustrated with this mysterious thief that was stealing his supply — it’d been months and yet he couldn’t catch the guy. “the guy” — yes, he thought perhaps this was the work of one of the many dangerous men in gotham. 
this type of organized, deliberate crime couldn’t possibly be done by a woman working all alone — wrong. he was so wrong. this was exactly the type of crime that would be committed by a woman such as yourself. he was a psychiatrist for crying out loud, shouldn’t it be in his job description to know personality types? 
jonathan had his goons working overtime, keeping a keen eye on the drug shipments, but it was no use — you were one step ahead of jonathan every time. jonathan was ready to snap his glasses in two at this point. for someone who was trained in human behavior and complex criminal psychology, you would think he would be able to detect a pattern by now. 
tonight, you had big plans — you were going to steal his toxin from his warehouse directly.
forget shipments and hideouts, this time you were going big or going home. it was all or nothing — and right now, you wanted it all. 
your fitted, latex, corset-esque bodysuit clung to your figure as did your matching, latex thigh-high pleasers. the cherry on the top was the black bunny ears you accessorized with.
sure, it was a little risque, even bordering on kinky, but hey — it screamed dangerous woman. it was like wearing a caution sign but in the best way.
something that said: “i bite.”
dressed in your usual attire, you head to his warehouse in the dead of night. you sacrificed a prolific amount of late nights to figure out the location of this warehouse, but it would all be worth it once you were drowning in piles of cash after profiting off of his toxin. 
you’d been watching him for months — you even knew where he lived. you knew his profession, his full legal name, where he grew up, what type of food he ordered the most when he got takeout…
but what can i say? you were dedicated to your job — your morally dubious and ethically questionable job, but still a job nonetheless!
you strategically checked every entrance point of his warehouse (which, by the way, took a total of two hours of driving and twenty minutes of walking in high heels to get to!), making sure that there were no cameras or potential threats waiting outside. once you decided it was safe, you went through the back door. 
how, you ask? well, it was simple — you had a key replicated ages ago when you’d first broken into his office back at arkham asylum. in fact, you had all of his keys replicated. you know, just in case. 
stop asking why — it was for personal reasons!
after sneaking into the warehouse, you flicked on the lights and started to rummage around immediately. you came here for one thing and one thing only; fear toxin — and lots of it. you looked up at the ceiling as if some higher power up above would answer your calls. please, you thought, show me what i'm looking for.
god was your witness that night — and your prayers were answered. 
…just not in the way you thought they’d be.
as you were bent over, half hidden behind a bunch of empty crates, you were digging through piles of miscellaneous items. you were locked and loaded, so very focused on the task at hand, that you didn’t hear the front door creaking open quietly. 
jonathan heard shuffling once he entered his warehouse, the lights being turned on clearly indicated someone was here. jonathan did not panic, however — he believed that the feeling of panic and anxiety was useless to the human body. how could he make rational decisions when his mind was filled with the what if’s?
he was certain that this time, he’d caught the thief that had been stealing his toxin red handed — finally. however, as he got closer to you, he realized that you were not at all what he was imagining you to be. as he inched closer and closer, he saw two little bunny ears peeking above some empty crates.
he silently made his way around the crates, only to be met with a sight that caused his jaw to drop slightly and his cheeks to turn pink. 
you were bent over in your latex bodysuit, on your knees, rummaging through a pile of random things and the best part? you were completely oblivious to the scarecrow standing directly behind you, watching you poke your ass out as the bunny ears on your head moved every time your head did.
jonathan cleared his throat, causing you to startle. you turned around as a small gasp left your lips. once you looked up at him, you couldn’t help but notice his eyes — they were so blue. he seemed to have noticed you staring though, as he raised a brow and gave you an opportunity to explain yourself silently.
“um,” you started a little nervously, “hey?”
you mentally face palmed yourself — all you could come up with was an “um, hey?” so much for being one step ahead all the time.
“that’s quite the costume you have on," jonathan said smoothly, looking at you through the frames of his glasses. “i assume you’re the one who’s been stealing my supply?” 
you stayed silent as he loomed over you — he was tall. very tall. he was still standing above you as you sat almost obediently on the cold, concrete floor of the warehouse. empty handed at that. 
“listen, bunny,” he continued, “do you know how much trouble you’ve caused me?” 
finally, you found your voice. “i do — that’s why i did it.” 
“is that right?” jonathan said, crouching down so that he was now at your level. you felt awfully immature; but it was kind of…exhilarating. to be in the presence of someone so dangerous, just like you. “you’re not what i was expecting.”
“what do you mean?” you asked, tilting your head to emphasize your question. his eyes darted to your black bunny ears, then back to your face. he didn't answer your question, but instead, he reached his hand out towards you. 
hesitantly, you took a hold of it as he helped you up. “do you always go around stealing what doesn’t belong to you in outfits so…promiscuous?” he asked, eyeing your body up and down shamelessly. 
“...i’ve never done anything like this before,” you admitted shyly, watching his eyes trail along every part of you. “i get off on the thrill, mostly.” 
jonathan almost choked when he heard your response — if he wasn’t so attracted to you, he would’ve sprayed an extra concentrated dose of fear toxin in your face. he was standing so close to you now that you could smell his cologne — montblanc, if you remembered correctly. 
“maybe we could work out a deal,” he suggested, his voice low and almost…sultry. “i won’t kill you or turn you into the feds — if you give me what’s mine.” 
a feeling of sheer panic surged through your veins; you’d already sold all the drugs you seized from him. it’s not like you just could get any of it back, and now your life was on the line.
“i-i already sold the drugs—”
“not that,” he reprimanded, eyeing you down hungrily, “i think you know where i'm going with this.”
you stared at him blankly for a moment before you felt your cheeks heat up at his insinuation. he didn’t want the drugs, no — he wanted you. according to jonathan, you were his now. 
i mean, that wouldn’t be so bad, would it? 
jonathan was not one to fall so easily, but once he laid his eyes on you, his heart stopped. a beautiful, young, witty woman who was also a thrill seeking, danger loving felon? you were just asking to be his. it didn’t help that you came dressed like you were a triple-x star, either.
“well, what’s it going to be, bunny?” he asked softly, brushing a piece of your hair behind your ear. 
“what tough choices,” you pouted, looking up at him as you feigned distress, “i don't know what i'm going to do, jonathan.” 
he paused, his hand coming to grab your face gently. “how do you know my name?” he asked, his tone sharp. 
“i know everything about you — i've been watching you for months.” 
he was silent as his jaw clenched slightly. a tell that his calm, collected persona was about to crumble at any given moment — you had him where you wanted him. “i see,” he replied calmly, “i should have you admitted to arkham, really. something is very wrong inside of that pretty little head of yours.” 
you didn’t say anything back, but you bit your lip softly whilst looking into his impossibly blue eyes.
that, however, seemed to be the trigger that pushed jonathan over the edge, because suddenly, he had you pressed up against the cold cement walls of his warehouse. your ass was pressed up against the obvious tent in his pants as your face was met with the rough texture of the cement. 
“i’m going to test your limits,” he breathed, “a little experiment between you and i.” 
“i live for danger,” you mumbled against the wall, not letting up as he continued to threaten you. his threats were fuelling you, if anything — didn’t he hear you when you said that you got off on the thrill of things? 
“prove it, bunny,” he challenged, and you pushed away from the wall, grabbing him by the tie that hung loosely around his neck. 
holding onto it with an iron grip, you brought your lips awfully close to his as you whispered out to him. “take this off,” you instructed, “and tie me up.”
“rope bunny — i should have known.” he teased back, undoing his tie. 
roughly, he pulled your body back against his. your ass was flush against his bulge, and he bound your wrists up with his silky, red tie. “walk,” he commanded softly, guiding you into a whole separate room — a room with an old bed. 
he helped you sit on the edge of the bed before shutting the door completely, making his way back over to you. with your hands tied, you were limited in terms of mobility, but jonathan's hands were free — and he intended to make very good use of them. 
“latex,” he pointed out, reaching over to your bodysuit, “bold choice...but it looks good on you.” 
his comment caught you off guard — his tone was far too sweet for what was about to go down. his voice had you in a trance for a moment, but the feeling of him trying to maneuver your garment off of your body brought you back to reality. after a few moments of fumbling with the tight suit, he finally got you out of it. 
his lips were on yours in mere seconds, kissing you roughly as he squeezed the sides of your neck gently. he continued to kiss you, his tongue exploring your mouth as you both moaned into the steamy kiss. however, after a few minutes, he breathlessly pulled away and took a good look at the sight that was in front of him.
you were suddenly very aware of how exposed you were — it’s not like you wore a bra or any panties underneath your latex bodysuit. there’s nothing quite like the thrill of wearing nothing underneath to get your blood flowing…
he let out a heavy breath, looking slightly disheveled as he took in every inch of your perfect body. the way your tits sat up, the way your skin was slightly flushed, the way you were on display like an art piece at some french museum — you were a divinity.
not to mention those latex thigh-highs that you still had on — and the bunny ears, too. fuck, maybe he’d keep you like this. take a picture and frame it to really make a point of you being an art piece for his eyes only. 
suddenly, he harshly pushed you down and flipped you around on the bed so that your stomach was against the mattress.
he hoisted your hips upwards, putting you in a face down ass up position. the way he positioned you made how wet you were all the more obvious, your glistening cunt on display for him as he choked back a moan at just the sight of you this powerless.
you heard his pants being unzipped, along with the sound of his belt being undone, and his hard, thick cockhead was brushing up against your sticky folds. he pushed into your tight hole, making the both of you moan. his hands were suddenly reaching for your bound ones, gripping onto the tie as he started to fuck you mercilessly. 
“j-jon!” you squeaked out against the sheets as you felt his cock drilling into you at a brutal pace, sure to leave you sore for days to come. “s-slow down, f–uck!”
“you can take it, bunny,” he assured you lowly, continuing to ram into your tight little hole. “you’re going to fucking. take. it.”
you let out a strangled moan, feeling his cock brush up against that spongy spot inside of you over and over again. it was only a matter of time before you were creaming his cock, the angle giving him access to the deepest parts of you. you were certain that at one point, you swore you’d felt him inside of your stomach with how deep and how forcibly he was fucking your cunt. 
“is this what you — fuck —  wanted, bunny?” he groaned, giving your ass a harsh smack with one hand as the other was still gripping the tie around your wrists. “you just needed to have your tight little pussy stretched by my thick fucking cock?” 
“y-yes, fuck yes!” you whined, “i need to be filled, j-jonathan please—”
“i know,” he cooed with faux sympathy, “you’re such a needy little bunny. you get a cock in your tight fucking cunt and suddenly you’re not so tough anymore, are you?” 
his words went straight to your core, rather than your head, soaking you even further and making his cock slip in and out of you with pure ease. he was slamming himself into your dripping cunt, fucking you raw as you took him so deep that you were full on screaming his name over and over again.
“j-jonathan, fuuuck!” you wailed, letting him ruin you entirely.
this wasn’t exactly how you planned the night to go, but it was better than you’d imagined. better than you’d hoped. you couldn’t dwell on the thought for very long though, because suddenly he was pulling out of you right before you were about to come, much to your displeasure.
you whined, causing him to scoff a laugh. he flipped you over to that you were looking at him now, in missionary, before he sunk back into you. you let out a bratty whine along with a pout. your hands were still tied so you couldn’t touch him — and you were getting desperate. 
“please!” you exasperated as he fucked you stupid, “let me t-touch you, oh my god—”
jonathan watched as your eyes rolled into the back of your head, and finally, he decided you’d been good enough for a reward. he reached behind your back, still balls deep inside of your warm, wet hole, and quickly undid the knot around your wrists.
and as soon as your wrists were free — you were clawing at his back. 
“fuck,” jonathan groaned, feeling your hands pawing at him.
his hand suddenly reached down, playing with your clit as you mewled out incoherent babbles and pleas. he continued to press his fingers against your bundle of nerves, bringing you closer and closer to the edge once more as he plowed you. 
your cunt was dripping with your arousal, you’d never been so wet in your life. you felt the knot in your stomach tighten as you were close to coming, and jonathan moaned as he felt your cunt flutter around his thick cock. “close?” he asked breathlessly, and you just nodded — unable to speak as your orgasm washed over you in a blur.
“thaaaat’s it,” he growled, “pretty baby.” 
you whined, looking to the side as you came down from your high, but he continued to ram himself deeper and deeper into your cunt. you reached for his biceps, clinging onto them for dear life as his cock stretched your walls right open. 
“i’m about to come, fuck!” he groaned. “should i come inside? i think i will — you like the thrill, right bunny?” 
before you could protest, he was spilling his warm, thick cum into your abused little cunt. you were on birth control but you hadn’t taken your pills in days — so you were going to have to figure this out later, after the reality of what could happen would set in. he was right though; you did love a good thrill. something to get your adrenaline pumping and your blood rushing. 
you were a fear addict, and he was the supplier of fear — you were freakishly perfect for each other in all the worst ways. 
after both his and your endorphin levels gradually calmed down, he pulled out and watched the mixture of his sticky, white cum and your arousal drip out of you.
“you know, i could use someone like you to help me distribute my toxin — i'd pay you more than whatever you're making now.” he said after a minute, and your head shot up.
of course — his version of pillowtalk was bringing up business. he seemed to read your thoughts unnervingly well though, because before you could say anything, he was talking once more.
“we’d make a good team, don’t you think? since you’re my girl now and all.” he teased.
“am i?” you teased back, placing a kiss on his plush lips. “hm, i don’t see the harm — i'm game if you are.”
“that’s my girl.” he said softly, brushing his thumb against your cheek. “i’m curious though, out of all the people in gotham — what made you want to steal from me?”
“what can i say?” you whispered, “somethin’ bout you makes me wanna do things that i shouldn’t.” 
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@girlinterrupted505 @ciriceimpera @jordyn-yeager @thevelvetvampyre @galactict3a
@xanaxiii @nocturnest @psylrd @bloodandglitter207 @humbuginmybones 
@oceanstem @futurefamousdeadmusician @jonathancraneslittlepet @esotericdoe
@kpopgirlbtssvt 
@ll4n4 @ilovetoxicfictionalmen @the-buddy-things @ellebelleshelby @wiseyouthinfluencer 
@abprill @minedofmoria @strangeobsessed @5tud10-54r4h @franzine-xii 
@stsrfujid @psylrd @eyraaaaaae @nyxxie-pooh @momoewn
@fauxcongenialite @ceruleanrainblues @o0laura
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atom-writings · 6 months
Note
omgg i cant stop giggling n kicking my feet BUT can i request gn!reader 'accidentally' leaving a lipstick kiss mark on russia, america, canada, greece and japan before they leave for the day and the countries dont notice until either from a mirror or someone else points it out? AAOUGUGGH
hetalia russia, america, canada, greece, and japan when their s/os leave a kiss in lipstick
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1.6k words ~ gender neutral headcanons
tw: none!
a/n: hjey guys did you know being a costume director is time consuming? i did not. send help. also enjoythis idk
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Russia
It was never an easy affair to get Ivan out of the house. His clinginess combined with how admittedly boring his job was made it near impossible for him to leave without you forcing him to. Today was one of those days, and you were beginning to think you’d have to leave with him.
"But darling, can't you understand? It's so cold and miserable out there..." He whines as he holds you.
He's got you positioned so that you're standing between his legs while he sits on the couch, his arms wrapped tightly around you and his head resting against your chest. So... no escape available without coaxing.
"I know, I know, but you'll be late..."
"They will be ok without me, but I won't be ok without you!"
All you can do is sigh until you're suddenly struck with an idea. You can't go with him, but you can leave something with him. And looking down at his snow-white skin, you have just the idea.
"But you won't have to be without me, Vanya!" You chide, tilting his head up to look at you. His face lights up instantly.
"What do you mean?"
Instead of responding, you lean down and press a soft kiss against his forehead, leaving a pink imprint of your lips on his face.
"That one was magic, ok? It'll stay with you the whole day, so I'll always be with you!" It's childish, and you're struggling not to laugh, but his innocent expression tells you all you need to know. He'll finally let you go, none the wiser as to what you really meant.
-
"Ah- Mr. Braginsky..." Some random intern was forced to prompt later in the day, his tone fearful as to how Ivan would react.
"Yes?"
"You... you have something on- on your face..."
"Huh?" He reaches up to wipe where the intern had gestured, but only smiles when he comes away with your favourite lipstick. He decides that whatever left can stay... it's just your magic, after all.
America
Alfred was a busy man for all the effort he expended to prevent that exact reality. He'd much rather spend all day playing video games at home with you, but duty calls. Though, now, was just glad that for once, you were busy as well.
“Hey, babe!” He greets you with a bright smile, resting his hand on your shoulder before moving to sit across from you. The meeting spot he had chosen was busy, but at least it wasn't far from either places you two needed to be.
“Were you waiting long?”
“No, not really,“ You respond with a sigh, twirling the straw in your drink.
”Well, that's good because uh- bad news, I won't be able to stay l-“
”Ugh! Seriously?��
He shrinks a little, fidgeting with his hair, ”Yeah, I know, but like- I can't reall-“
”Do they know you're a person? Like, a person who needs to live?“
“Technically, I'm not, babe,” He laughs, “But I appreciate how protective you are anyway.“
He continued to talk with you for a while, about your day, his day, a weird guy he saw on the street, about how you can't keep threatening his boss because he's the president- until after only a few moments, his phone rang.
He sucked in a quick breath and accepted it, only speaking for a second. Then, he got up with a dramatic groan.
“That's my cue. I guess I'll see you later, K?”
But he wasn't about to get away that easy. You shot up, grabbing onto his tie and pulling closer so you could kiss his cheek quickly.
“For good luck,” You assure, and he grins.
-
“What are you guys laughing about?” Alfred asks as soon as he goes back to work, looking nervously at the group of co-workers pointing at him.
“Got something on your face, man!”
Instantly, he realizes what happened and hurriedly wipes it off. His face is red with embarrassment, but he can't deny the butterflies in his stomach.
Canada
No matter how long you've been together, Matthew never stopped trying to be the picture-perfect boyfriend. At least, that's what you thought as he chose to show up with roses when he came to pick you up. It might've been a fancy event, but you're sure no one else would be doing that kind of thing. But who were you this kind of attention?
“Uhm- good evening, Y/N,” He stutters out as you let him come in for a moment.
“Awww, you shouldn't have!“ You take the roses from him and set them aside.
”It- It's nothing, really-“
”Most men wouldn't even think of that anymore...“ You assure him. He looks sheepish now as if he hadn't expected you to like your gift.
”Then- then, um- they should learn how to t-treat their partners...“
How cute. You walk over to him and stand on your toes to kiss his cheek, to which he immediately stiffens and blushes.
“Thank you, Matthew.”
“Ye-Yeah, uh-huh- yeah- y-you're welcome,” He mumbles, looking down in embarrassment. The colour gracing his cheeks almost perfectly matches the mark your lipstick left behind. You begin to say something about it, but before you can, he frantically cuts you off.
“So- we should get g-going right? Right, time to go...” He blurts out, taking your hand and almost dragging you out to the car.
-
Finally, once you two arrived at the event, you gathered the courage to tell him.
While you two walked, arm in arm, up to the main entrance, you suddenly blurted out, ”You have lipstick on your cheek!“
Except by that time, more than a couple of people had seen him. causing him to instantly freeze up.
The colour drained from his face, and he weakly whimpered out, ”Um, c-could you- uh- g-get it?“
You immediately obliged, cleaning off his cheek. He was embarrassed, but it was still on his mind all night.
Greece
“But do you have to?”
“Yes.”
“But-”
“I’m not getting out of this one, ok?”
“But I don’t want you to go…” His protests were typical, but that didn’t make them any less annoying. Although, it’s hard to resist him when he’s clinging to you like a lost puppy and he smells like he just finished cooking.
“It’ll only be a few hours, ok?” You sigh, finally finishing your makeup.
All he can do now is whine softly, which makes you realize there may be only one way to stop his desperate clinginess. You turn around in his arms, take his pleading face in your hands, and press frenzied kisses all over it. Instantly, his eyes light up and his lips form a dopish smile, and you know you’re free.
“Is that better?” You ask, and he nods. But before you let go, you have to admire how silly he looks with your lips painted all over his face.
-
By the time you return home, it’s already dark. The house is quiet, and when you check the time, you realize he would’ve fallen asleep hours ago. But considering how exhausted you are already, it’s nothing but a relief.
When you enter your shared bedroom, your thoughts are confirmed. He’s already passed out, his broad body splayed haphazardly over your blankets. At first, you don’t think anything of it. But when you turn on the light to get ready for bed, you notice the red stains still sitting on his cheeks.
Somehow, throughout the entire rest of the day, he never looked in the mirror long enough to notice the lipstick covering his face. Or, maybe he did, and just decided that your tokens of affection could stay.
Japan
Kiku was never late. Not even when tired, sick, or at war, was he late to anything. So, the one day that he allowed himself to relax with you, was naturally the first day in centuries that he hadn’t been an hour early. 
“It’s gonna be alright!” You call out from the bathroom while you do your makeup, and he doesn’t even waste the time to respond. Even from all the way across the house, you can hear him desperately throwing things together.
“It is not alright!”
“You’ll still be on time!” That doesn’t seem to convince him to calm down at all, as you can hear his panicked breaths growing louder as he makes his way over to the entry door.
“Wait, wait, hold on,” You insist, and he pauses for a moment. When you meet him at the door, he looks a mess. His hair was askew, his eyes wild with panic, and his tie nearly all the way to the side.
You sigh and begin tidying him up. He relaxes under your touch, you can tell even from under his layers of stoicism; although he can’t allow himself to bask in your attention for long.
“I must go-”
“I know, I know, just…” You pull him forward, quickly pressing a kiss to his cheek. He blushes but doesn’t let that distract him. In a moment, he’s gone out the door.
-
After a frenzied drive into the city, he can finally breathe a sigh of relief. 10 minutes early… not great, but enough. He looks in the mirror one last time, making sure he looks his best before he finally steps out into the public when he notices it. The print of your lipstick, still on his cheek.
His touch lingers on it for a moment, his breathing stilling, before he rubs it off. You’ll just have to replace it later, he tells himself before he finally steps out of the car.
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majordemonblockparty · 7 months
Text
that one line from bobby's hunting guide or whatever, about how john picked up dean one night on the side of the road after dean had gone out looking for him... in my gut I know john was a "get out of the car; you're hoofin' it from here" kind of parent. a "quit that right now or you're walking home; hope you can find you way" kind of parent.
so I need sam waiting on tenterhooks in the motel room of the week, up way past midnight waiting for john and dean to get back from a hunt. for him to breathe deeply for the first time in what feels like days when he hears the rumble of the loudest car in the universe rolling into the lot, and for john to give the special knock at the door and sam's so relieved to let them in, equilibrium resettling, all three of them together under one roof.
only dean's not with john.
he's not out under the weak light of the parking lot sodium lamps. he's not crouched over the back seat of the impala, rifling through the footwell. he's not unpacking gear from the trunk or coming back from the bank of vending machines with condensation-wet cans of squirt jammed in his pockets or leaning bloody and spent against dad's shoulder.
he's not. fucking anywhere.
I need sam losing his absolute shit, zero to feral in six-point-three seconds flat. screaming and scrabbling at john, "where is he where is he where the fuck is he?!" I need sam just sobbing with his whole chest because it finally happened, this is his nightmare, his literal worst fear realized because dean's dead out there somewhere and knowing dad, he's probably already salted dean down and soaked him in gasoline and lit him up, a tragedy with no loose ends.
I need sam just wailing, can't catch his breath crying, the ugly snotty gagging kind of crying as john finally just manhandles him back into the room and tries to tell him, "jesus, sammy. he's fine. thought it'd be a good idea to run that smartass mouth of his on the way back, so he's taking a little time to himself and walking the last stretch here."
I need sam who looks at john with more disgust and visceral loathing than a twelve year old should be able to manage. who grabs his coat off the bed and his knife from under the pillow and is out the door into the night before john can get a hand on him. I need sam sprinting down the busted concrete drive to the main road and taking off along the sloping gravel shoulder in the oh-dark-thirty blue-blackness, still crying but trying to get his breath back so he can holler for dean.
(I need dean trudging along in the pre-dawn dark, pulling up short when he hears the slip-slide of running feet on gravel headed towards him and his name screamed into the dark. dean who takes off at a dead run because sammy sammy sammy sammy shit-fuck sammy what's the matter)
(I need sam who launches himself bodily at dean when he finally gets close enough. who lets his heart pound rabbit-quick against dean's chest through their jackets. who's probably too big to be picked up and held like this, really, but who can't won't let go once he's got dean wrapped up in his arms. who slides around to dean's back and pulls dean's collar aside so he can put his ear to dean's pulsepoint as he's piggybacked the rest of the way back.)
anyways... john pretends to be asleep when they make it back to the motel. they know he's awake, he knows they know he's awake, but no way is he gonna look at sam's face again without at least five hours of sleep under his belt.
(nobody says a word about it when they pack up and check out in the morning. nobody says a word about it, ever.)
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koolades-world · 8 months
Note
Can you do some crack headcanons for Obey Me where some accident causes MC to temporary get wings that are not only huge af but also let them fly super fast? Like a singular flap could cause MC to almost bump into the ceiling at Diavolo's castle alone. They can also zoom through the air at high speeds and you can just hear the "ZYOOOOOM"
One thing I can imagine is Lucifer teaching MC how to fly and immediately regretting it cuz he's the only one who can get even remotely close to them when they're flying and MC finds it funny to fly away from him(it's also out of fear of what will happen once he gets them)
hi! haha yeah of course! this is too funny can kinda imagine mc going splat like a in a cartoon LOL
let's set the scene: solomon fed you something weird that he cooked up in a cauldron after promising you something you want, and this makes you grow these super large, super strong wings. he swears they'll go away eventually, but it's up to you if you believe that or not. how does your man react?
Mc with temporary wings
Lucifer
kinda like a disapproving dad for accepting yet another strange potion from solomon
despite this, he takes you under his wing (haha get it?) and teaches you how to control them
once you get comfortable, you invite him to play games that he pretends he doesn't have time for but always joins in on. he secretly really enjoys having someone to
gosh,,, sky tag 🥺 the silly potential is endless since in the sky, there are no expectation for either of you
Mammon
probably also would have taken that offer from solomon
as another wing haver, he can help you out a little
the first time he tried to give you lessons, you accidentally smacked him in the face and sent him into the wall behind you
after that, he’s much more careful, and once you get the hang of it, he's teaching you his crafty ways
Levi
manages to reference at least three different animes he's seen around the situation
he thinks your wings are so cool but won't admit it
at one point, he takes you diving at Siren Beach for fun since you would be able to move through the water quickly with the large wings. lotan joins and you end up finding lots of cool stuff!
afterwards, he helps you dry off your wings since that wasn't exactly something you thought about before you got in the water
Satan
he's quick to ask solomon about how he made the potion out of curiosity
also asks if he can study your wings and watches you as you learn to fly
kinda goes science mode on you
since he knows how tiring carrying around that new weight must be, so he gives you lots of tasty food to replenish your energy, and offers you massages! (he learnt from simeon, the best)
Asmo
over the moon! he thinks they're so beautiful and almost wants to ask solomon to give him a pair too
he will accessorize you even if you run away, so expect lots of him hustling after you with all his ribbons and bows in hand
"Mc, sweetie, you're gonna look so cute!" is holding the ugliest old lady esque bows ever
teaches you all his favorite arial tricks even though both of you realize early on that you don't have the agility required with how large your wings are
Beel
can't comprehend how fast you are with those things
even though he also has wings, you fly circles around him with yours (if you even have the control for that)
quickly introduced you to aerial sports and the two of you find games to play together, even though it's kinda hard considering how different your wings and skillsets are
since they're only temporary, he wants you to make the most of them, and takes you sight seeing!
Belphie
you're literally just a pillow as far as he's concerned now
they're perfect for wrapping himself in and if you wanted, you could hide the two of you in them
when you're practicing flying, he yells out all sorts of useless "useful" tips, such as not to run into something you've already hit
he just sits on the sidelines, wrapped in a blanket, watching lazily amused
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star--nymph · 3 months
Text
I think people forget with Cullen, and characters like Cullen, that indoctrination is a thing. We're lucky to live in an age where we have a surplus of access to resources that allow us to think critically on the structures around us, to the point where we overlook that most people won't and haven't. Cullen was raised in a backwater village where the main educators and leaders were Templars. He was likely taught scripture by Chantry Sisters, he possibly learned to read and write through them. From the day he was born, he was being taught to love and obey the Chantry with out question--and the Chantry teaches that Templars are a force of good.
So I ask you, how the hell was Cullen, at eight or thirteen years old, going to learn about the crimes of Templars? How was he going to unlearn propaganda that was fed him to him every day by people he respected and possibly loved? How was he supposed to be aware that this idolized image of Templars being the saviors of the people and even mages was a lie?
And then he gets shipped off, happily, to be trained a Templar. Again, he's put into this position where he's fed nothing but propaganda. He doesn't get a real taste of the Order being corrupted until he's out in Kinloch and he's not sure what the hell to do because what he's seeing isn't jiving with what he's been taught for nearly two decades. So yeah, he tries to justify it, he tries to have his cake and eat it too by reasoning that mages should be treated like people but also the Order wouldn't lie to him, so they must be right to act like this. The Maker always had a plan, right?
If Cullen had been lucky, maybe he could have realized earlier on that the Order was abusing mages, that he had been tricked, he could have gotten out and unlearned the bigotry that was planted inside him.
But then BAM! the Broken Circle happened and I don't see how no one gets how perfect this is for the Order? They now have a templar that is so traumatized by mages, he will literally do and say anything to justify their abuses because now? Now he's afraid.
And remember, after Origins, Cullen becomes so erratic, he has to be sent off to a Chantry to 'even him out'--where he was more than likely manipulated even further by the Chantry to be this blood thirsty agent for them. When he's shipped to Kirkwall, they could have not delivered to Meredith a better second in command.
So yeah, is it really surprising that he says shit like 'mages aren't people like you and me' when we meet him in Kirkwall? Man is sleep depraved by the looks of him, swallowing all Meredith's frenzied rhetoric on blood mages, he's seeing for himself the damage these mages are doing, he's isolated from his family, he has no actual friends, and he's living with C-PTSD among other issues. Even under the best of conditions, none of what he says or does in DA2 is surprising when you put it all together.
And yet, the man still had enough of that idealistic child left in him to realize see that Meredith was going off the deep end and that he should be protecting the mages. That's text. That's in World of Thedas. The reason why Cullen is able to turn on Meredith in the end is because he was able to see, even clouded by his fear and hatred, that what she was doing was wrong.
And all this isn't to excuse Cullen's wrongs. It's weird how every time someone brings up Cullen's history, it's assumed that it's just a justification for his actions. It's not, it's an an explanation. Cullen was a victim of the Order that became an abuser, a tool, and he is responsible for his actions.
But the thing is, by DAI, Cullen is well aware of his sins and he actively works to better himself by leaving the Order and getting off lyrium (which for most people is a death sentence). People can argue all day about whether or not Cullen's arc in DAI redeems him or was satisfying, or if he did enough to 'prove' that he was sorry or--good god--does he deserve redemption in the first place (which is such a Catholic way of looking at shit by the way; no one 'deserves' redemption; you do it to be better or you fucking don't) but the fact is that Cullen says that he wants to be better, that he sees the Order as--at the very least--flawed.
That, yes, he's still unlearning all the bigotry he held as a younger man and he's ashamed that he was like that to begin with.
You can hate him all you like, and whatever, but Cullen's story--intentionally or not--is about a man born into an oppressive society, raised to uphold its beliefs, used and abused by it, and then awakening to those lies and trying to free himself from those beliefs so he could be a better person.
And sometimes I genuinely wonder if the reason so many people hate Cullen is because they themselves might have dealt with something similar in our own oppressive society where they also had to unlearn harmful bigotry and maybe, just maybe, he hits too close to home.
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