#told them they should do this with one i rly fucked up pretty bad once ngl lmaoo n they didnt respond which 😡 im serious

[hollowfairybabybat]

lemme tattoo u with some dumb lil cute design then u n then tell everyone its ur kids drawing

[acidrcins]

did you hear the latest scoop ? we’ve got a new student joining us ! a little birdie told me that they’re called CHAE SEORI, but they kinda remind me of BAE SUZY — don’t ‘cha think ? you’re probably thinkin’ they’re just another TWENTY-SEVEN year old in their FIRST year of some MASTER'S DEGREE IN BIOCHEMISTRY , but wait ‘till you hear about their POISON GENERATION ! nifty, huh ? they’re pretty PRINCIPLED on nullivi, but you should watch out for their VINDICTIVE just in case ! anyway — if you wanna check them out, i heard they’re staying at the YELLOW HALL. oops ! you didn’t hear that one from me !  ༊*·˚

hello, i'm liv and v excited to b here! im a sl*t for anything superpower related and im also still off that gen v high so very excited to be here! all i can offer is this intro post, which i hope covers all the Key Aspects of miss chae seori. if i may summarize, shes just trying her best to be a good person while making questionable decisions and internalizing everything bad that her family has ever said abt her ‪♡‬ a cate dunlap wanda maximoff dupe rly

do like this post if u would like to plot because i would LOVE to and i much prefer d*scord hehe

also tw for mentions of nausea

𖥸 ─ basics

chae seori (often seen with gloves and a mask)

scorpio sun, pisces moon, scorpio rising

born 12 november 1996 in a small town in the outskirts of seoul 

currently a first year masters student, studying biochemistry & living in yellow hall

makes poison out of her fingertips & can infect those through physical contact or through air (if in close proximity)

there have been rumours going around that seori is able to give a kiss of death but she would like to debunk those rumors! her lips are harmless really its just the air around her

big on wearing patches but she wont tell you. will make u guess whether she has one or not. (justifies by saying shes just having fun)

𖥸 ─ personality

tl;dr morally grey girl, who's trying to prove herself as a good person (but it's hard when your powers are literal poison). a little bit of a manic pixie dream girl too

positive: principled, collected, intuitive, charming, inquisitive

negative: reticent, elusive, vindictive, temperamental, self-centered

alignment: chaotic neutral (the only principles she follows are the ones she sets for herself)

character inspirations: heavily inspired by gen v's cate dunlap, the hunger games' finnick odair, mcu's wanda maximoff, looking for alaska's alaska young, yellowjackets' natalie

archetypes: the vixen, the philophobic, the antihero

associated aesthetics: shades of gray, smiles that don't seem to reach your eyes, making questionable decisions but finding ways to justify them to yourself, dark eyes and darker nights, flirtatious touches with a hint of danger, red lipstick, unexplained headaches and waves of nausea

in control of her emotions but has tendencies to lash out. she is working really hard to be a good person!!! (by her standards) (she is thisclose to just saying fuck it and just embracing that she is a Villain tho pls someone enable her)

but she can get very resentful lmfao (example A: in her most recent biochemistry class, she told herself urself it was ok that the guy in class just mansplained a concept that she had already understood in middle school but then also gave him a wave of nausea once class ended because he was so fucking rude and deserved it)

keeps up a facade of being coquettish and flirtatious ( i never watched doona but that was the vibe i got from her gifs lmfao ) i think she can be quite charming tbh the queen of breadcrumbing ‪♡‬ keep them close enough, but never enough to touch. it's sort of a coping mechanism. safe space where no one can see what a shit person she really is and how she doesnt really deserve love

no one really knows much abt her and she intends to keep it that way

heavily motivated by wanting to know more! generally the kind of person who would conduct wild ass experiments or "would you love me if i were a worm" i kinda picture it like how finnick in catching fire is like he's paid with secrets!! same vibe with seori :D

𖥸 ─ background

pretty ordinary life growing up. parents are not particularly rich but they don't struggle either. happy small town family ‪:)

shit hits the fan when shes twelve and her brother is fourteen and they find out hes an anomaly. superhuman strength and speed. finds out after he saves a dog from getting hit by a car

if it had been anyone else, perhaps, they would've been the town's outcast but because it's her older brother, all conventional good looks with conventionally lauded powers, they worship him. he becomes the town's superman, girls come up and take pictures with him, he even gets featured in the town parade and seori is just there in the shadows

it gets even worse two years later when she finds out shes also anomaly! but unlike her brother, seori causes an incident of projectile vomiting after a particularly envious moment where her family forgets her birthday and instead, spends the day with her brother. it is messy and disgusting and it happens in the town center. no one forgets. and seori is no longer there in the shadows, she's actively cast out, whispers about why she cant be more like her brother and this is why anomalies should not be given rights

it takes seori some time to figure out her powers but she gets the hang out of it. not that it matters lol shes the black sheep, the 'villain' because goddamn shes literal poison. even her family treats her that way

she doesn't believe those words until one day she gets into a heated argument with her family. tells her mum that shes a person too and wails her father that no one has called her by her name in years and she's nothing but a stain in their family. they don't deny it and in a fit of rage and hurt and anger, she manages to cause irreversible brain damage to her brother

and that is the moment seori realizes she is the villain everyone talks about and she is the monster (doesnt help that her pupils are dark and her veins are black) !!! not a pretty look (think the monsters in sweet home before they transform kind of vibe) and so she runs

runs and runs and runs to seoul where she gets by on illegal means. she is ashamed of the things she has done (e.g., disrupting the storeowners vision long enough to get food to eat, sent someone into unconsciousness and pretended to be their granddaughter caring for them to get a house to stay, batting doe-eyes to boys who will buy her a pack of ramen) and since then shes actively working on being a better person

swears to keep her feelings in control, only uses her powers when justified (although her moral compass is cracked)

𖥸 ─ wanted connections

thank you if you made it this far! ‪♡‬ ‪♡‬ mwah mwah i appreciate u also i love plotting and just brainstorming so here are some rough ideas but OFC always open to talk !!

friends ! or better yet, friends who only meet late at night and you talk about the stars and your feelings and in the morning you pretend you have no other who the other is

someone who's immune to her....

fellow individuals in #STEM

ok this is really specific BUT what if.. our muses were enemies... and they kissed... and seori's feeling INTENSE emotions and accidentally fucks ur muses' vision up and gives them a headache and she has to pretend like it didnt excite her

she doesnt believe she deserves to be loved, so i would LOVE an angsty first love breakup thing. bonus points if she broke ur muses heart

she accidentally poisons u (she swears its an accident)

u catch her doing some immoral shit and tell her shes not a good person

a sam/cate situation. someone enable her to just fuck it youre not a good person so embrace it!!!

i love angst and antagonism so lets beef (ic)

[trickstarbrave]

Saw you wanted to take about Evil/Crazy Nerevar, so here's some prompts:

Evil Nerevar's immediate reactions to seeing the person Azura told him was Voryn Reborn?

Nerevar's thoughts whenever he sees them do something Voryn Would Not Do? (support the Empire, worship a Non-Dunmeri God, have a distrust of Daedra, not like him, etc.)

Nerevar's reaction to Voryn needing to infiltrate the Thalmor, or even his thoughts on the Dark Brotherhood and the possibility of his Voryn (as far as he's concerned) joining the people that once hunted him down?

Evil Nerevar's immediate reactions to seeing the person Azura told him was Voryn Reborn?

he was buzzing with excitement, wondering if this was a dream or not. he's rehearsed what to say for so long. he asks if you're the dragonborn and asks (more like begs) to speak to you in private and then explains he is nerevar and was sent visions of azura because azura wanted them reunited and for nerevar to help you. when you ask "reunited?" he would then laugh a little and say he got too excited and clarify the dragonborn is the reincarnation of voryn dagoth he's been looking for

Nerevar's thoughts whenever he sees them do something Voryn Would Not Do? (support the Empire, worship a Non-Dunmeri God, have a distrust of Daedra, not like him, etc.)

ngl he gets rly upset and starts questioning the dragonborn. because to him it's unusual, if not dangerous. voryn was always the more level headed of the two of them, a careful planner, etc. it would take a lot of explaining to smooth things over (like saying you're using the empire for your own benefit, or acting clueless and saying you'll let nerevar tell you what you should be doing instead, etc), and if you react badly (like insisting you're different and can make your own choices) it will add up to the bad end where he becomes convinced 'voryn' is not in the right state of mind and needs to be kept locked up and safe until he gets his memories back

Nerevar's reaction to Voryn needing to infiltrate the Thalmor, or even his thoughts on the Dark Brotherhood and the possibility of his Voryn (as far as he's concerned) joining the people that once hunted him down?

nerevar thinks breaking into the embassy is a stupid fucking decision, but says maybe you can find some other information. i actually was debating putting a few documents in there about nerevar and how he might be a threat the dominion as they dont know what exactly he's looking for but that he might have been a blades operative at one point who should be disposes of

for the dark brotherhood i think he's pretty miffed about it saying he has horrible history with them, and that he appreciates the morag tong much more. but it would be easier to smooth over than say, siding with the empire as it would be kind of on brand for voryn. he will talk a lot about how he feels mephala's presence around the dark brotherhood sanctuary though

[menalez]

Peak story time please!!!

What was the first thing that peaked you, and when did you peak (not just specifically “peak trans,” but anything “peak patriarchy”)?

okay so in terms of like “peak patriarchy” tbh it’s hard to pick one moment. i grew up in a pretty patriarchal society & country. i was already pretty sick of it from a young age bc i was basically getting called a whore, being harassed, & getting pressured by ppl within my society (luckily not my family) over me not wearing the hijab. when i was in my early teens, i faced rape & most ppl i had opened up to (most being close friends) either said it was my fault or called me a liar or basically minimised what my rapist did like it’s not a big deal to rape someone. again, was called a whore & harassed for that. then i had this one guy as a remaining friend & lucky me, happens to be a guy who had a crush on me for 4 years at this point & was persistent despite repeated rejection. eventually i felt bad and powerless bc rejecting him didn’t mean anything to him, he was arguing im “still his girlfriend” (when i said im not with him & do not want to be) and he said maybe to ME we rnt together but to him we r. anyways after putting up with that for a while, i ended it for the 50th time & he said “is it bc ur a lesbian” and i said yes. 6 months later he sends me flowers to my place in bahrain (his brother delivers it to me) & i was like wtf. so i had to end it again. and again. by that point i was pretty fed up honestly but eventually i got him to leave me alone bc he said like “stay pls maybe i can change your mind ;(“ and i said he cannot and then said if my mind changes ill hit him up. i already knew my mind wouldn’t be changed lol bc i tried not to be a lesbian for long enough to know it’s just not possible. but at least that somehow convinced him to leave me alone. but then when i was done w that situation & opened up about being a lesbian online, i got repeatedly hassled on whether id date a trans woman etc & about penises. i was a tra and was like no unm id totally date a trans woman but not with a penis bc im penis-repulsed. and ofc then i got hassled w messages like “isnt that terfy / transphobic” so at this point im like what the fuck. here’s where i started to peak. anyways like a year or two later i have my first gf right and she’s a massive TRA. im still leaning towards the TRA side but talking vocally about how sex exists & so does sex-based oppression & that lesbians are allowed not to like penis. anyways my then-gf pressures me into an open relationship & says it’s bc my body is like “too perfect” & it makes her insecure and she hates her body etc. she says that she was told that polyamory can help solve her body image issues & was convincing me of how it’d work. i was skeptical and not for having an open relationship but like how can u say no to someone u love telling u that ur the reason for their insecurities & that u can help them simply by letting them fuck other ppl??? so i was like okay fine. immediately my ex dates like 3 other ppl at once, 1 of them being a trans woman. i was against this n was like how’s this meant to help w ur body image issues … this person literally has a penis and a completely body from u… n my ex was tryna convince me that it does help somehow. anyways the trans woman wants desperately for us to become a throuple. writin detailed fantasies about me to my then-gf, made a Facebook profile set in bahrain with an arabic name with a hentai profile pic, etc. eventually my ex says “oh but i don’t think she’d be into that, she’s penis repulsed” and the tw goes all :( aw what a shame :( i hope she gets help for this :( and my ex agrees. my ex then tells me about this non-chalantly. im like erm ok… then a week later i text my ex and i say that the whole thing rly upset me. they both then proceed to gaslight me that im crazy & it’s not like that & im such a misandrist & i should be able to love trans women bc they’re women and what’s in their pants doesn’t matter. my ex switches between telling me that i should undergo some genital “exposure therapy” and telling me such therapies aren’t useful so it’s not like they want me to go there. i stand down eventually. probs peak trans there

[autonoes]

so there is a situation. no one has to read this bc it’s probably gonna be pretty much incoherent and i’m just tryna think things thru. (self harm and suicide mention)

me and two other guys have been friends for like 13yrs or smth. let’s call them friends A and B ok. friend A is like the sweetest man ever but a v passive and anxious guy, v bad at making decisions and just coasts thru life and gets pushed around. he’s had this sorta older gf (early 30s i think) for like 2 yrs. she is basically a surrogate mum for him (drives him around, tells him what to do, gives him a place to live blah blah). it’s a bit creepy but ok. she has been up front since day 1 that she wants babies. loads of babies. friend A has somehow skirted around the issue and put it off for years now. he is NOT ready to be a dad and he says this openly—but not to her. she has an unstable visa and work situation and quite bad anxiety/depression. A’s mum gets on suuper well with girlfriend and wants them to get married and have kids asap

enter friend B. friends A and B have this mutual friend. friend A opened up to this mutual guy and told him that things were kinda fucked up between him and gf. main thing is that she’s self-harming and friend A feels like he needs to protect her. this has made him super isolated cos he can’t stay away from her at all without her calling and texting constantly asking him to come home. mutual friend tells friend B all this out of concern for friend A, and tells him to tell me too. friend B starts messaging me abt how we need to step in and do something (i’m at the other end of the country at this time). he’s even considering telling friend A’s mum so that she will swoop in and save him. at this time i was under the impression that girlfriend was threatening friend A with self harm and suicide. so i was like that’s abusive as fuck. u gotta talk to him. so friend B meets up with friend A. but he brings that mutual friend guy AND some other dude we all know from school who knows nothing about all this??? and he totally fumbles it and doesn’t even mention anything. very annoying but ok. i’ll just do it

anyway so now i’m back in the same part of the country as them all. and i’m gonna talk to friend A. i meet up with friend B and try to get more info out of him and he tells me that yes there IS a self harm element but now he doesn’t know whether it’s being used as a threat or not. so this makes everything waay more complicated and throws it all into veeery sensitive gray area.

anyway i’m meeting up with friend A tomorrow and idk how exactly i’m gonna approach this. bc i’m not even meant to know ANY of this rly. like it’s v sensitive and confidential info that he gave to a totally different guy and which has now passed two hands to get to me. so idk whether it’s best to pretend like i don’t know anything and just coax the same info out of him so we can talk abt it. or whether i should be up front and say i heard some stuff i’m concerned abt and ask him to give me his perspective on it all…. i don’t mind talking to him abt this. i feel like i might be able to come at it on his level bc i have had some experience w this kind of thing in a relationship before (tho when much younger and a lot less messy) and i know how it can fuck ur head up.

it’s all a mess tbh. i’m gonna stop thinking abt it and just talk to him and take it as it comes. i am worried abt him. either he stays w her and leads her on even more abt having kids til she goes completely mad and dumps him. or he does have kids (not good situation). orr he actually takes a stand for once and tells her he does not want children and they split. this is probably the ‘best’ situation but it would be very hard for him and for more reasons that i cannot explain might end up very badly for him….. aaagggggh. v upsetting. i hope he will be ok

omg this is long and incoherent. sorry if u read all this

[crimeronan]

eta: SUPPORT HAS BEEN WONDERFUL, can comfortably get meds And groceries and probably pay back part of rent too 🥺 thank you guys

hello! kitkat crimeronan here with a new request for assistance 😔 god truly does give his hardest battles to his sexiest soldiers..... [stares mournfully into the distance]

the short version is! we cannot rly afford the meds & medical-related food i need at the moment. the financial need is short-term - the household Should be okay financially after i get paid for some upcoming freelance work, but i can’t.... really.... wait several days to get the meds and food.

https://www.paypal.me/kitkatmkath

https://ko-fi.com/elliptical

venmo: @Katherine-MacEachern

the longer version is! back in september when our finances were tight because of health insurance issues and illness, you guys saved us So Much headache & stress. i hate to be making another post like this so soon after that but am Cautiously Optimistic that this is the last big struggle for a while

basically: what i Thought was an injury was actually a mad fucked up gastrointestinal issue. the first attempt to fix it Almost worked but not fully, so The Big Guns are being deployed, etc. i need to go on two different heavy-duty antibiotics and do a specialized diet for a week, and then i’ll be fine.

truly not bad, as treatments go! like. almost miraculous, as treatments go

the One problem is that i STILL don’t have the billable info for my health insurance policy - i can be reimbursed later, once i Do have the info (yay!), but for now i’ve been paying out of pocket. and it has been.... uh..... a lot of doctor’s visits. and meds. (and expensive imaging, but the hospital staff told me i didn’t need to pay upfront there 🥰)

so between that and my wife’s health insurance application Also being in process, i have paid...... [counts on fingers] ~$560 more than usual for health expenses. Just This Month. 

i do not have $560 in excess savings floating around my typical monthly income.

rafi has been covering a lot of our daily expenses like groceries to make up the difference, and they also paid significantly more than half of rent this month (though i will be paying them back when i’m able). so their funds are Also pretty depleted. i borrowed some money from my mom to replace our food after our fridge died (SERIOUSLY. THE FRIDGE FUCKING DIED. ON TOP OF ALL OF THIS.) but i ended up using it to pay for a doctor’s visit instead

all this is to say, Everything Happens So Much. just wanna buy groceries and medication, man, what gives :(

so! any help will go toward paying for my meds, my food, and general household groceries. if anything's left after that then it'll go toward the usual household bills and also reimbursing rafi for being an absolute angel who can do no wrong

as with the last time i made a post like this: Please don’t feel pressured to give if you aren’t able, and definitely don't feel pressured to give a Lot. literally anything & everything helps. i really appreciate you taking the time to read this, thanks to everyone for being so supportive and kind while i've been In The Health Shit these past few months 💕

(posted thursday, october 21, 2021)

[lanshappycorner]

Deuce Spade facts and fun facts🥳🥳

This is a list of facts and fun facts about Deuce! This list is based on true facts only and any observations I've made, however observations can be subjective, so those will be labeled properly! Let's start off with some facts already in the wiki :)

First Yr, class 1-A, student no.24

Birthday: June 3

Age: at the beginning of the game, Deuce is 16, but currently, he is 17 [his profile in game has not been updated, but as time is proven to flow in game, it is unclear but can be interpreted that the characters do canonly age]

Gemini

173 cm / 5'8" ft

Homeland: Rose kingdom

Family: Mother, Grandmother, it is implied that his father is out of the picture as Deuce states that he is the only man in the family so his father has either left or is dead

Club: Track and Field [alongside Jack]

Best subject: PE

Dominant hand: Right

Fav food: Egg dishes / omurice

Least fav food: Bell peppers

Dislikes: Limited time sales

Hobby: Magical wheel (twst motorcycle I guess but it looks kinda funky)

Talents: Machinery Maintainance [good with fixing gadgets and etc]

Used to be a delinquent before he heard his mother crying on the phone to his grandmother about his behavior. Afterwards he decided to change

Owns a pink leopard printed suit

Cannot do middle school math, he will take a lot of time to solve simple Algebra problems

Gets nervous and stops functioning entirely when talking to women

Onto some fun facts outside of the wiki! These facts have been gathered from various sources (ppl who can read japanese, ppl who have told me abt info in the twst guidebook, twitter, and ofc the main translated story), but I cannot prove 100% authenticity of this, so take it with a gain of salt

Canonly a pretty boy. Deuce is described as the "cool pretty type" in the twst guidebook

Smells like flowers [applies to all students from Rose kingdom]

A romantic, he admired the king and queen of heart's relationship and trey teased him about it

Thought that baby chicks hatch from store bought eggs until the MC and Grim told him the truth

Can cook eggs (he likes them over easy)

Wanted to make a magical wheel club but was rejected so he joined track and field

Bought magical wheel magazines when he was younger and studied it

Wanted to ride his magical wheel in the heartslabyul maze (mentioned he forgets bad things when he rides it so like...it makes him feel better)

Hates limited times sales/shopping but is extremely good at it. He can remember the price of an item, when exactly it sells out, the percentage/probability of when it can sell out, discount prices and pretty much any math that has to do with it [he's extremely good at shopping because his mother brought him out a lot with her to limited time sales]

In addition to the point above, it is implied he can memorize and calculate that for pretty much every item he intends on buying (everything I listed above is in relation to the time he bought 20 limited time puddings which greatly impressed Sebek who wasn't able to grab even 1, but it was later revealed that he also bought 8 bag full of items requested by Trey for baking, as well as the others probably from heartslabyul) so basically Deuce big brain and very good memorization abilities

Hilariously in the instance above, Sebek, who is like...a real fae, has said that what Deuce did was not something a human can do

Flirted with a plant because vil was fucking around with him and told him to

Was ready to fist fight Riddle

Was about to go find Leona to beat him up but Vil was like do u have no fear and Deuce pretty much said that he can get thru to Leona with his muscles

Was about to fight Malleus (jesus christ) but ended up fixing his tamagotchi and came out completely loaded and rich (good for deuce, get that cha ching babey)

Won a Track and Field competition (noted to be rare for a first year)

He is literally a pretty boy, it's been pointed out that he looks good in the ceremonial clothes (but we already know that)

Admires Riddle and sees him as a role model, has called him boss (like...yakuza boss terminology) once

[Observation] Has a pretty good relationship with Jamil as he has asked Jamil to help him practice his Stargazer dance, and mentioned him once again when talking about how Jamil fixed his hat and said that he was a reliable upperclassman

Has said fuck and would not hesitate to say it again 🥺

Has been called honest and cute, was fawned over by kalim and trey. Kalim said Deuce was similar to his younger brothers

During his delinquent phase, he was blamed for many things he didn't do as well, Deuce said that he realized no one believed in him despite what he says, but because a policeman stood up for him, he wanted to become a cop when he grew up

Used intimidation tactics [the equivalent of "u wanna fucking go let's go I'll beat ur ass" to scare off ppl and silver was like hm I will have to try that sometime, to which deuce was pretty much like ahahah no dont

Deuce refers to Yuu as his "mabu", basically calling Yuu his best friend

He can change a lightbulb, and he talks abt hand washing materials and just domestic house stuff in general as if it's common knowledge. In other words it's implied Deuce is really good at housework due to doing a lot for his mother

When he was a kid, he used to cry because he thought there were monsters outside, but it was just hanging laundry

Is more scared of Riddle than ghosts

It's implied that one time (or several times...) he stayed after school with Crewel, and the poor guy had to attempt to explain the same concept over and over again to Deuce for hours until he understood

Ace always cheats in card games with Deuce, so Deuce claims that it's not very fun playing with him

Bad at astrology bc apparently all stars look the same to him

Likes cafe latte

Does tease ppl, he once messed with Yuu and in the process called Ace "Ace-kun" (Ace called him "Deuce-kun" as well). There has been an instance where he's teased Jack about his Niceness TM

Used to have over 30 gang members following him at age 14-15. (You'd think that him being so young would make him like a lackey but no he was the boss)

Has a thing for summoning cauldrons since he was young, but apparently you need to have a large amount of magic capabilities to summon objects, so [observation] deuce may actually be extremely powerful bc he was able to summon things at a young age, but he hasn't refined his powers yet so he still seems weak compared to a lot of the cast

During his delinquent phase, apparently he had a really wild hairstyle and he used his magic on people weaker than him

[Observation] Deuce is actually pretty good at lying. In his Halloween card he was able to put up a good act and deceive some of his ex gang members into following him into the forest before mildly roughing them up (keep in mind that he has not had contact with these ppl for at least a year, yet somehow he was able to assert enough authority to tell them to follow him. Also, he thought of this plan on the spot, and acted malicious enough so that the gang members would believe in him—which proves that he's not only quick witted but a convincing actor, as Jamil actually believed his act for a while)

It's implied that he and Ace are often in leadership positions, as they helped to lead heartslabyul in designing their Halloween booth, but they also mentioned that it was much easier compared to organizing unbirthday parties

[Observation] despite wanting to be an honor student, Deuce is still able to take unjustly means to achieve his goals (EX. Making a deal with Azul to pass his test), in general, deuce doesn't care too much about the method, be it through cheating or violence to get to his goal, but he does value a fair battle

[Observation] a lot of Deuce's strengths are subtle as we are frequently told abt how much of a bad student he is, but if u rly think abt it, deuce is put in leadership positions a lot, he's good a memorization and small technical details, he can be at times quick witted and deceiving, and he has the potential to be extremely powerful in magic. In conclusion Deuce is a menace and once we find out what his unique magic is I'm 100.01% sure he will become a greater menace and I think he should fight a lot of people and win

That will be all for this post! There may be more fun facts/observations that I may have missed, but feel free to add on to this! Anyways thank u for reading and please stan Deuce Spade♠️💙

[fktonofwhatnow]

ok hold on. acomaf is my fave book out of the whole series (it's mostly out of emotional value, i read it when i was younger and didn't have a real understanding out trauma and abuse only that i saw a character i loved getting out of a bad situation and getting happy) so obviously i didn't mind feysand being endgame and the development all of the characters had. i can accept tamlin turned out like that is realistic due to his trauma, i can accept feyre had to flee because it wasn't right for her, but the thing is after acofs i see no point to feyre leaving tamlin when rhysand ends up doing everything they told us tamlin was evil and unredeemable for. hiding the risks of her pregnancy, putting on shields on her, having feyre need to compromise over it. i honestly felt so betrayed by that. i'm not saying feyre and tamlin were good for each other, but it doesn't feel worth it to dismiss the potential they had for what we got with feysand.

also, sarah learn to treat "ugly" trauma with respect challenge. no they don't need to learn to physically fight to fight it. no they don't need a love interest to overcome it. yes the behaviors acquired from trauma and abuse aren't pretty but that doesn't mean a person is undeserving of kindness and compassion.

i think i had a point somewhere but i can't get to it. so hope you don't mind my rambling. anyway i loved your meta about tamlin i think he deserves better too

HOLY SHIT THIS ONE IS SO GOOD OK IM SO EXCITED

Bro you are so fine, I'm the one who doesn't make any sense and I totally get what you're trying to say. (Acomaf was actually my favorite book in the series too ngl)

BUT FUCK YEAH LETS TALK ABOUT RHYSAND.

I don't think it's a secret that Rhysand is one of my least favorite characters in media, probably ever? (How do I even put this into words) He is a bad character and to me, laughably so. You know how if you've ever written a character, there's that little phase that's like "what if people don't like this character' and then you're sad for a little bit? That's how Rhysand feels to me. He feels like SJM looked at this character and thought "I can't stand the thought of people not liking this character because I love him so much" and then did everything in her power to make sure we know how great he is.

Idk if this is just me screaming into the void, but I get to this place with my characters where like, especially if they are a little more morally gray or their decisions have negative impacts, I understand that I don't need the audience to like my main character. they can stand on their own, they can own up to what they do and they can grow from it. Thats what a good character does. That's how you keep your audience rooting for them. You gotta knock them over sometimes.

SJm doesn't knock Rhysand over. She doesn't push him to make mistakes, apologize, own up and move on. Rhysand has never made a decision that ended poorly for him. Everything goes the way he wants it to, because SJm wants us to know how cool and great he is. People who are cool and great don't make bad decisions! SJm doesn't let Rhysand fail, and she doesn't let him suffer his own decisions. Everyone else suffers his decisions, not him.

Rhysand's reputation as a good person hinges entirely on the audience liking him and/or thinking he's hot. And then what happens when the audience thinks neither of those things? Ya get a rly long post like this by a lil enby who is mad all the time. Rhysand loses all credibility when you look at him through a critical lens. Not a single thing the man does makes any goddamn sense. Here I thought acosf would give us a different perspective on Feysand and I was desperately hoping that Nesta would tell us what she really sees in them and how people around them really feel, I hoped that SjM would throw us for a loop and tell us that hey, she does know that Feysand are fucking toxic as hell and ruin the lives of people around them and she wants to show us that from an outside perspective but noooOoOOOoOoOOOO...

Instead we get Nesta hating herself because Rhysand told her that she shouldn't tell Feyre that Feyre could uh die in childbirth. Hey what the fuck.

Now I don't actually ship feylin, I kinda always sorta knew, even without spoilers, that it wasn't going to work out. Tamlin isn't sjm's idea of a good partner because he's not charming and witty and dark and handsome ya know? We met Rhysand and I knew that I was going to fucking hate this romance. Which sucks because I found Rhysand so intriguing in the first book. Ngl all the time spent in the spring court was kinda boring and every time Rhysand showed up to throw dead faeries at Tamlin I was like "oooooo" and I wanted to know more about why Tamlin, this awkward, blunt and kinda shy dude had beef with this super duper sly and shady man from another court.

I don't know if I've ever said this before, but SJm doesn't let her love interests grow. Rhysand doesn't change over the course of the story because he was already a good guy and his motives were for Feyre's sake I swear, the same goes for Rowan in TOG. SJm doesn't give Rhysand room to change. She needs to get to the part where they fuck make sure everyone knows that Rhysand is a good guy and actually he was good all along so that we like him more than Tamlin. It backtracks on everything bad Rhysand has ever done because you know... He had a good reason! It's fine!

I know it's probably just because SJm doesn't actually know how to write a good character growth arc but... Like can you imagine if Rhysand stayed the bad guy? Or at least remained the bad guy through acotar and acomaf? And then when Rhysand comes to take Feyre for his bargain it really was only to spite Tamlin? What about Rhysand, taking Feyre to the night court with him once a week every month for a long time, if only to see Tamlin's eyes grow darker and emptier every time he goes, and then he really starts to fall in love with Feyre. He's been a monster all this time, angry and cold and cruel and then he actually starts to fall in love. And then to get Feyre to stay he really does try to change, he stops antagonizing Feyre, he stops throwing dead faeries at Tamlin, and he stops harassing the Spring court. He starts spending genuine quality time with Feyre, he starts to learn about her and all the things she likes and he stops trying to get her to come with him just so Tamlin will be mad. He starts asking her to come with him because he wants to be around her and he prays that someday she'll want to be around him too. What if SJm let him grow.

But nahhhhhh instead we have a character who always knows the right answer to things, and he always knows how to fix every issue, and he is always so innovative and outside the box except that he isn't. We get a character who does the same shit as Tamlin but it's ok because he had a good reason not to tell Feyre that she could very well die in childbirth. Uhhhh don't know what that is but uhhh I know he has his reasons because all he has are his reasons.

It would be so easy to hold a mirror up to Rhysand and say "look at this. Look who you are. Do you not look just like Tamlin right now?"

But nooooooooOoOOOo Rhysand doesn't get to be wrong. Rhysand doesn't get to look like Tamlin because Tamlin is evil and Rhysand is definitely NOT I SWEAR.

But yeah I think the point I'm trying to make is that Sarah thinks so highly of Rhysand that he could never do wrong. He could never be like Tamlin, despite the narrative literally telling us the exact opposite.

Like you said, we lost the potential of what feylin could have been if SJm didn't suddenly decide that her audience needs to love Rhysand as much as she does. I think feylin could have been slow and sweet and a story of true healing and learning about one another. I think it would have been kind and steady and lots of "are you ok"s and "I'm sorry"s and "talk to me"s. Everything about Feysand feels rushed and hard and fast and the rest of the world doesn't have time to catch up. It's fucking exhausting to read it ya know what I'm saying.

(also can we talk about Rhysand like dying and Feyre finding the suriel and learning he's her mate and then instead of being like "k let's put a pin in that and fuckin save his life first" she like throws him around and everyone is like "wtf woman" and she's like I neeD tO Be alOnE these people have no idea how to prioritize)

Truly, I think it's innocent to a degree. There is absolutely no harm in wanting people to like your character. The harm comes when you destroy another character with no reason or explanation other than you want people to like a different character. Villain arc? Completely out of left field. You gotta build to that shit or like... Make it so that when you look back you slap your forehead and yell at a wall "OF FUCKING COURSE I SHOULD HAVE SEEN IT"

anyways, SJm treat "ugly" trauma with respect challenge SECONDED.

WELL IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME WEEKS YO WRITE IM HAVING A HARD TIME I know it probably doesn't make any sense I can't find my braincells BUT thanks for the ask @xelly

Tell me all your acotar things I love yo hear them !!

[lesbolieeh]

And one of the biggest problems is that I'm personally not even bothered by it anymore, I got called a dog eater. Then when I was carpooling they told be not to drive because I was Asian so I'd crash the car. The worst thing is that the person who said that was also a person in a minority group. And when I pointed it out they said "I'm __ (Not gonna say their race), I can't be racist!" And I feel bad for pointing it out now, since it felt like I was offending them and other people of their race.

It’s rly sad but I think it’s so normalised bc in influential classic US American movies Asian characters would only exist to be a joke :/ looking back at movies like ‘Pretty in Pink’ I wonder to myself if movies like that popularised making fun of Asians. I have met a lot of ppl who make fun of Asians and then say they’re not racist bc they don’t hate Asians - do ppl rly not understand or see that it’s immoral and discriminatory to make fun of a whole race or specific ethnicities? Is it bc they’ve been taught since they were kids that it’s okey to do it ?since that’s what happens in famous movies? Just bc u don’t “hate” a race doesn’t mean ur not racist! Come to think abt it, Asians rarely get casted as main characters in the west. I think ‘Crazy rich Asians’, ‘To all the boys I’ve loved before’ and recently ‘Senior year’ are the only movies I’ve seen w Asians as main characters or other characters that get a lot of screen time. Which is kinda fucked up tbh especially since it’s 2022.

I remember I once called my best friend cute like a puppy and this guy said smth like “the only difference is that she eats it” and it took me a few seconds to understand what he actually meant and I was so shocked bc he’s a gen z and also goes to a prestigious school on an international program w ppl from everywhere! I realised that literally anyone can be racist, no matter the generation or who they associate with. It’s fucked up that he thought he could openly say racist shit to anyone and expect them to b okey w it or smth??? And I’m literally a minority too so it doesn’t make sense y he’d think he could say racist shit abt a half Asian person in front of me??

honestly I didn’t know that bad driver was an Asian stereotype b4 but how rude! Anyone can be a racist! If someone’s racist against ur race doesn’t mean u can’t be racist against x race. Honestly racism or xenophobia is not uncommon in minorities bc it’s a traumatic defence reaction towards discrimination and dehumanisation (to put someone below u in the racial or ethnic hierarchy after trauma caused bc of ur race or ethnicity so ur not the lowest rank). Like a lot of ppl of my ethnicity r rly xenophobic bc we have been colonized and ethnically cleansed by multiple countries not that long ago. It doesn’t justify racism or xenophobia, however!

Also I wanna say that it’s always ok to criticise anyone for racism, xenophobia or any other type of discrimination no matter what their background is!

A year ago I was speaking my language w my friend and this neo nazi classmate asked me “are you guys speaking *language of ppl that ethnically cleansed my ppl*?” KNOWING our ethnicity! I put him in his place bc I was so fkn done w ppl joking abt ppl ethnically cleansing my ppl literally in the 2000’s. Yesterday two guys (of different minorities) at the library were speculating my ethnicity (and got it right) and then went on to stereotype women from my country (thinking I didn’t hear them since I had AirPods on) and I told them off when they were gonna leave. and I just have to say it’s never wrong to point out racism or xenophobia ever!

I’m sry if this rant abt my experience in any way minimised ur experience I just wanted to talk abt that u should always confront and tell ppl off when they are being racist or xenophobic, no matter who they are

[gagmebucky]

Hi, I just really wanted to rant about something and I don’t really want to talk about it with anyone I know irl so…

My dad is just a normal guy in every sense of the word, good and bad. One thing that’s bothered me for a while now is how I recognized he talks to my mom and while it’s not degrading, it’s just entitled and annoying.

Since my brother and I were born, she quit her job to take care of us so he’s been the one primarily earning money. This arrangement hasn’t put our family in any type of financial jeopardy at all, we live in a nice house in a nice area and his job combined with the money he makes from his previous service in the military makes him around 150k a year. One thing I’d like to note is that he works a normal 8 to 5 job. But for a year or so the majority of his company has switched to a12 hours day so they get a three day weekend every week.

Now I know you may be wondering what money has to do with any of this and I promise that I’ll get to that part I’m just really angry and need to get this all off of my chest.

Anyways, my mom started working again 2-3 years ago at his request and now she works AND does all the stereotypical motherly things (cooks dinner, cleans, any other odd jobs that need to be done around the house)

All the while my mom has been doing this, my dad does his 12 hour days (including lunch in those 12 hours) and he’s allowed to take 10 minute breaks and most often times watch tv in the background while he’s working (he’s been working from home since COVID and doesn’t have any plans to go back since his job is mostly on the computer anyways other than a couple in-person meetings a month)

After my dad is done with work, he basically retires for the night and just watches tv while waiting for mom to serve him whatever food or leftovers she’s put on a plate for him.

Now, I get to the current issue.

My mom doesn’t ask for much or even anything from him in terms of helping her. But there are just some things that make me angry when he says them.

In the past couple of weeks for pretty much the 1st consistent time since March, my dad started walking and exercising again which he does outside or in the garage. My father has naturally oily skin, and even if he didn’t, he is exercising so his skin will be sticky and sweaty! RIGHT!?!?!

However when my mom brought it up a couple days ago she didn’t even say what we both were thinking which was YOU STINK AND ARE THEREFORE MAKING THE HOUSE STINK!!!

Instead, she politely asked if he would take a shower since he worked out and specificied that she was telling him this out of love without even mentioning him stinking up the house or more specifically the kitchen that he was in.

Instead of understanding that exercise makes you sweat and sweat makes you smell, he snarkelly shot back, that he had something to tell her out of love too. And although he trailed off with a cocky laugh, the context of the situation and his numerous past suggestions obviously implied that he was talking about my mom’s weight.

I would like to specify that my mother is not obese or unhealthy, in fact she eats considerably less junk food than he does. And even if she was, it did not prompt my dad making that “joke”.

Now fast forward a few minutes, my mom and I left to go grocery shopping for the food she would make for him without him even having to lift a finger. She ranted to me that him needing to take a shower had nothing to do with her weight. From what she was saying I could tell that she wasn’t that angry about what he said about her weight, but more so about him deflecting the conversation from his smellyness to her (which is something he does often so he doesn’t look like the “bad guy”)

Now to today, my father once again “joked” with my mom when asked if he would honestly like to help her blow dry her hair (I say honestly because she wanted his honest opinion on whether he would like to do it or not, and it was something she never really needs help with but she wanted to spend time with him) he said that he needs to consult the “guy’s handbook” to figure out if that was a trick question. (My father is 55 years old and they’ve been married for 30 something years)

I’m sure there’s a psychological reason why I got so angry at him but I’m not going to settle that I was once again tired that he treated my mom like crap despite her doing everything for him. So I told him that my mom was being serious and it wasn’t a trick question.

I (kinda) knew that he knew this, and was trying to make a joke. But explaining it was my version of the whole “I don’t understand your ‘joke’ please explain it to me” in an attempt to discourage him from making it again.

But in an event that I would have seen coming if I wasn’t so angry, it didn’t work and he instead got mad at me. Recognizing that I could have handled the situation better, I just apologized however I was crying because of his rant that I wasn’t a part of the conversation and shouldn’t have stepped in . (I normally wouldn’t be so sensitive but for some reason it’s like everytime I have a family argument it’s that time of the month so I’m emotionally sensitive)

I retreated back into my room and apparently I wasn’t crying as quietly as I thought I was because be he then knocked on my door, then demanded that I come out and “spend time with him” so he could know what was wrong.

Now, I thought this was code for I’m going to apologize, but no… he literally didn’t understand that his words hurt my feelings and demanded that I tell him what was “really” wrong as if him yelling at me wasn’t a good enough reason to be crying.

After curtly telling him what was wrong in so many words as to not offend him further. He dryly apologized before defending himself and saying that it wasn’t his fault that I got angry and he was just trying to make a joke that he insisted would apparently be funny if I didn’t cut in. Then he dryly promised that he would try to treat my mother nicer and not make as many “jokes” because he can tell how much it affects me.

There is probably more to the story that I forgot to leave out. And I kinda want to know if I’m in the wrong in the situation or not. And reading back over this i am definitely biased but if you can manage to remove the emotion from my words then those are honestly the facts about what happened.

I recognize that I am selfish, he actually told me that one, but looking back over my life I know that I have been rude when “defending” my mom. I put it in quotations because my mom doesn’t need defending and she is more than capable to speaking up when there’s a big problem.

But I just get annoyed at people when they rudely deny her some of the smaller things she requests like help blow drying her hair and things she won’t insist on them helping on. I’d understand if kindly said no thanks or I can’t do it right now, but he just had to joke about it and be curt in his response for no reason.

All in all I’m just so angry that it is impossible for him to acknowledge what he did wrong without defending that actions that make someone sad or angry in the first place.

But anyways, I am extremely sorry for the rant and writing so much and I honestly don’t blame you if you didn’t even read all of this. I just wanted to tell someone and I love how your blog is so open and judgement free and you don’t act like you have all the answers of what is right or wrong but you just give your opinion and help when you can. Thanks so much for listening (reading, really) and I appreciate you so much!

baby, you didn’t do ANYTHING wrong. you are the opposite of selfish — your dad was being a fucking dick to your mom and you stood up for her. you had every right to be angry, and if i were you, i would’ve said some low blow, disrespectful, kick-me-out-of-the-house ass shit.

i think (respectfully) you’re over analyzing yourself to find fault in yourself when it isn’t really there in my opinion. he’s complaining that you’re rude when he was the rude one and you literally just defending your mom. being rude is like “you stinky piece of shit, im gonna fucking drown you in bleach and lets see you make another fuckin comment BITCH”

but you did not do that therefore his argument is invalid. i can only say so much because it’s you in the thick of it but it definitely seems like your dad’s arrogant and entitled personality is so overbearing that it makes you be harder on yourself than you should be. i think, legally, you should get hit him once with a bat, non lethally of course (unless….. haha…?). i just know personally dealing with that personality type can create a LOT of contained anger.

anyway, im rly sorry you have to deal w him. i feel like you have a lot of weight on your shoulders and you seem so sweet and nice and you do not deserve to have to give your energy to that :(

[ratisnotcrying]

camera

summary: Martin’s written poetry for as long as he can remember - he thinks the first poem he wrote was in year one, probably with some questionable rhyming and no actual link to whatever the task even was, but he had enjoyed it, a lot, and had entered every poetry competition (under a pseudonym) right up until sixth form.

Then, in year twelve, one of his teachers had lent him a photography guide and Martin became obsessed with the idea of taking pictures to go with his poetry.

prompt:  ‘camera’ from creativepromptsforwriting

pairings: jonmartin

warnings: the lonely (entity), hurt/comfort, but otherwise i think it’s just fluff 

word count: 1.4K

a/n: this is cross posted on ao3 and  I thin this is rly ooc - its defo outside my comfort zone and im pretty sure i hate it bUt… i also have tpp on the brain and some of jons lines sounded a bit like juno??

~~~

Martin’s written poetry for as long as he can remember - he thinks the first poem he wrote was in year one, probably with some questionable rhyming and no actual link to whatever the task even was, but he had enjoyed it, a lot, and had entered every poetry competition (under a pseudonym) right up until sixth form.

Then, in year twelve, one of his teachers had lent him a photography guide and Martin became obsessed with the idea of taking pictures to go with his poetry. He would have liked to stay and learn photography, but his life was flipped on its head and he had to drop out. So he did the next best thing: he got a disposable camera and took pictures in his neighbourhood.

It was an… adequate solution - he could take the pictures when he had to walk to the shops or had to wait for his mother somewhere, and he could nip into Boots to get them developed when he was in town. In the few years between dropping out of sixth form and joining the Institute, though, he didn't have much chance to write, let alone have time for photography.

By some miracle, having a stable, full time job changed that because just after he got his first payslip, Martin found a vintage polaroid camera in a heart foundation shop not far from his house - it was quite dear, especially considering that he had to find the right parts, but it gave him the kick he needed to start taking more photographs (trying to get his money’s worth and all that).

He started off taking pictures on his way to and from work. He kept a small notebook with him all the time and tucked the polaroids in between the pages (to stick in at a later date) and would write his poems on the corresponding pages. He had briefly entertained the idea of taking a few pictures inside the institute, though he quickly decided against it - Jon would no doubt have been angry, and Elias seemed to have eyes in the back of his head.

His next venture was more nature based and he took to spending most of his time in various national trust parks and gardens with his camera and notebook, though it was at this point that most of his poetry was touched with elements of his feelings for Jon. And various horrors he read about in the archives. It was a weird time.

It had become such a habit, carrying the camera everywhere he went, that it was no surprise that he ended up with more than a few pictures of him, Tim and Sasha together, though these went in a little photo album rather than his notebook.

Sasha and Tim would tease him about his hobby - not in a malicious way, mind you, and, in fact, it turned out alright for Martin in the end because Sasha had nicked his camera once, when they were all at Tim's and took one of Martin's favourite pictures.

He and Jon had been in a not-so-heated debate about something - he can't remember what anymore - and they had completely forgotten that Tim and Sasha were even there until the camera flashed from over the coffee table and the pair of them had started cackling at the absolute horror on Jon’s face. He had tried to tell them off, but their laughter was infectious and he hadn’t been able to keep a straight face for long enough.

Sasha had given the picture to Martin and told him to put it in his photo album, and Tim had joked he should mark this momentous occasion - “the first and only time a picture of the elusive archivist has ever been taken.”

It was a lovely picture. Jon wasn't scowling at him, which was a nice change, and it was clear as day how utterly besotted Martin was - all soft smiles and heart eyes. He had intended to stick it in his photo album, really, but he decided against it - something about it capturing his feelings so plainly made him want to hide it away.

So he put it in his wallet. Maybe it was a bit weird, but it's not like anyone knew he had it or anything, and likely no one would ever need to know it was there. It wasn’t until a week later he decided to get some double-sided tape and paper to stick a poem to the back.

Wish

I wish that you didn't have to know, I wish that my thoughts would slow, I wish that you would see, How much you mean to me.

~~~

It wasn't until he and Jon were safely tucked away in Scotland that Martin was reminded of the polaroid in his wallet.

“Martin, I’m going to the shop. Do you have any cash?”

“Should do - have a look in my wallet. I think it’s on the coffee table.” Martin called back from the kitchen.

There was silence for a moment and Martin went back to the washing up.

“Martin?” Jon said, the vaguest hint of laughter in his voice. “What’s this?”

Martin lifted soapy hands out the sink and used the back of his hand to push his glasses up before turning around. Jon was standing in the doorway holding up a polaroid. The polaroid. Fuck.

“Uhh…”

They both stood there for a moment. Martin was convinced he was actually about to die of embarrassment.

“Sorry? I didn’t- I wasn’t trying to be weird or anything, I just-”

“Martin, it’s alright. It’s… actually kind of sweet.”

“You think? I mean, I thought it was weird when it was taken. I never thought it would be sweet, I mean, who keeps pictures in their wallet anyway? I don’t-”

“Yes, Martin, I think it’s sweet. Now, do you need anything from the shop?”

~~~

A few nights later, Martin couldn’t sleep. He couldn’t sleep most nights, but this was a bad one, one that found him sitting on the little bench outside in his thin pajamas for most of the night. He stared blankly into the horizon, barely registering the sun rising in muted orange through the thick fog that had wrapped around him.

Martin had never been one to indulge, but since his time with Peter he allowed himself this one luxury. Being here, alone… there was cold comfort in it, a tender stiffness settling in his bones, keeping him firmly in this place - he wasn’t sure if he wanted to be here, but it was familiar; it was safe insofar as he could navigate it.

He startled when he felt a hand on his shoulder, which was soon replaced with a blanket.

“It’s cold, Martin. Come inside?”

Martin hummed noncommittally, slowly becoming aware of how the stiffness was actually near painful, the cold comfort was not comfortable, just deceptive, and he couldn't completely tell where the empty landscape ended and he began. Except it wasn’t empty. It wasn’t empty because Jon was there, perched sideways on his lap and half wrapped in the ratty old blanket that had been on Daisy’s sofa when they arrived. Because it was freezing and Jon’s fingertips and lips were already turning a funny grey shade.

He swallowed, throat dry, “Sometimes I think that I'll wake up and you won't be here. Not… not because you don't want to be, more because I still don't know what I did to deserve this. I can’t tell if this is real.”

“You don’t have to earn this, Martin,” Jon frowned, brushing dew-soaked curls from Martin’s forehead, “You’re allowed to be happy,

Martin didn’t seem to hear him, eyes drifting in and out of focus on something neither of them could quite see, “I- We don’t even really know each other, Jon.”

“We have time, Martin, we can learn. For example, I know how to make your tea properly now - it’s very complicated but I know it’s important to you.”

Martin laughed shakily at how proud Jon sounded of himself, and absently started rubbing Jon’s hands between his own to try and warm them up.

“I wish that you would see, how much you mean to me, Martin.” It was Jon’s turn to laugh now, Martin’s cold-kissed cheeks burning up with an embarrassed blush.

“You’re shivering, come on, I’ll make tea.”

[rhabakoli]

Your writing is just- WOW. May I please request a one shot of Geralt getting jealous, confessed feelings and some rough possessive sexy times?

HI!  I did not forget. I didn’t I swear. I just rly struggled with this, and I’ve decided it’s not gonna get better, so here it is. 

@dreamwritesimagines @alwaysadreamingoptimist

ENJOY! 

Geralt had been trailing behind Jaskier all day, made sure he wasn’t alone and unprotected. Never let him out of his sight. 

Okay, maybe he was a bit overprotective, but could you blame him? Jaskier was rather unobservant and oblivious on a good day, he rarely caught danger until it hit him in the face. But that’s what Geralt was here for. And alas, as he stopped watching Jaskier to inspect some leather-bound books and fine quills, someone promptly saw their chance. Big, burly, face like a potato that fell onto the floor one too many times, no sense for personal space and social boundaries. Geralt growled and his brain completely shut off when the stranger took Jaskier by the arm and attempted to pull him away. He was by his side immediately, face terrifying to look at and posture clearly tense and ready to pounce. Jask was struggling against the man’s hold on his arm and didn’t notice Geralt until he talked. “You better take your hand off my man, or I’ll do it for you.” Jask would deny his squawk until the day he died, but he was glad for Geralt’s appearance still. The stranger sneered and ran his eyes over Geralt, before looking back at Jaskier. “That guy with you?” Before he could answer, Geralt pulled him close, pressed a kiss to his temple and growled: “Got a problem?” Jaskier’s heart fluttered at the possessive display and he curled his hand tighter into his bag to stop himself from clinging to Geralt. He’d surely not appreciate the bard taking advantage when he just wanted to help. So he forced himself to relax and put a smile on his face – when all he wanted to do was to turn in Geralt’s embrace and tuck his face against his neck and never let go. Why did he always have to fall for the wrong ones? The unapproachable ones? Potatoface let go of Jaskier’s arm and murmured something that made Geralt growl even fiercer, louder. “Leave right now and I’ll let you live.” 

He didn’t really want to let him live, not after he frightened and hurt his bard. The monster inside him fought for control, but Geralt knew if he let loose, the result would not be pretty and for now he needed to get Jaskier out of this place. “If you’re fast enough, I won’t even hunt you down.” Jaskier’s eyes got all big and round, the shock obvious. “Geralt!” The Witcher hushed him softly, his arm tightening around him. “It’s okay, shh.”   Potatoface seemed to smarten up and decide to keep his life, because he scoffed and stomped away. Geralt stared after him, trying to make him fall to the floor in a heap of dead flesh, but he – fortunately – did not have that kind of power. Jaskier blinked, trying to progress the Witcher’s hands still on him. He also didn’t seem to be in a hurry to let the bard go, which – weird? “Uh, Geralt-“ His head whipped around, golden eyes focused on Jaskier. “Are you okay?” Taken aback, Jaskier nodded. What the fuck was even going on?   “Good.” He turned, arm still around the bard and stalked off into the opposite direction. “Wait, what the fuck did he say? Geralt!” He completely ignored Jaskier’s protests and just hauled him away, through the side streets until he stopped at a little tavern. He opened the door, shoved the bard through. “Wait, Geralt, what-“ “For fucks sake, please shut up for just a moment.” Geralt nodded at the bartender as they walked by, towards the stairs. Did he have a room here? They only just arrived this morning, how did he already have a room? “Geralt-“ The Witcher growled, whirled him around and grabbed his jaw. “Jaskier. Shut. Up.” His eyes were dark and a testament to his self-control because they looked absolutely wild. Jaskier came to realized just how tense Geralt was. He snapped his mouth shut and nodded. Or tried to. Geralt’s big hand restricted him somewhat and Jaskier tried so hard to keep his brain and body under control. He’d dreamed of Geralt holding him like this, but in a wholly different context. “Upstairs.” Geralt jerked his head, telling Jaskier to go up, to fucking move. His hand let him go and instead touched his lower back, guiding him. It felt weirdly intimate and warm, and Jaskier was confused.

Geralt was seething inside. Seeing that brute, that sleazy fucker touch Jaskier, his bard – he could be glad Geralt didn’t cut him down right there. And then he felt the other relax against him, let himself be taken care of- fuck, his insides did somersaults. If he would just do what he was told without talking back one fucking time. Just fucking once. Once in his room, he locked the door and braced his hands against it, just breathing for a moment. He needed to calm down. Otherwise he’d do something stupid, he knew. Something like kiss Jaskier. Or hoist him up and fuck him against the door. A hand touched his back, right between his shoulders. “Geralt?” Jaskier sounded concerned, cautious. Geralt tried to relax, unclench his jaw and let down his shoulders from where they were pulled up to his ears. How would he ever live if anything happened to his bard? If he ever took interest in someone, real interest? Jealousy reared its head again, ugly creature like it was. It sharpened its claws, whet them on his ribs and it hurt. “Hey, nothing happened.” Jaskier’s voice was soft, comforting, as if he were shushing a wild animal; he was, in a way. He wasn’t sure what was going on inside the Witcher’s head, but he did relax under his hands, just slightly. It was a start. Geralt mumbled something under his breath, barely audible and it frustrated Jaskier to no end. “Could you please speak up, I wasn’t gifted with superior hearing, my friend.” Oh. Oh shit. Geralt tensed all over again, his back hunched and his hands on the door curled to fists. Shit, what did he say? Before Jaskier could backtrack in any way, Geralt had whirled around, grabbed him and pushed him against the door. The bard was caged in by this big, thick man, and It probably should not make him feel this safe. Still, Jaskier hoped Geralt would chalk his erratic breath up to the sudden change of position and proximity. The hand on his hip burned through the material of his clothes, the other had found it’s way to his jaw once more, Geralt’s thumb right over his pulse point. “I am not your friend.” Jaskier froze, both at the words and the sound of his voice. He sounded raw, hurt, pained. He didn’t think he’d ever heard him like that before. “What?” Geralt refused to meet Jaskier’s eyes and focused on his eyebrows instead, then his nose, his lips. “I can’t be your friend, Jaskier.” A humorless chuckle left his lips. “I can’t watch you, day in day out and pretend to be your friend. I can’t pretend to not want you any longer, I’m sorry.” Geralt pushed away, back to the bard and rubbed his hands over his face. “Fuck, the things you make me say.” Jaskier needed a couple of seconds to process whatever Geralt had just told him. Has it been… a confession? Did Geralt feel more than just annoyed fondness for him? Did he – Did he like him??? “Geralt-“ He had to clear his throat before continuing. “Geralt, what do you want?” He watched the Witcher’s ribcage expand with every breath he took, watched him turn his head. The tension was palpable, made it hard to breathe. Jaskier was sure he would pass out any second, if Geralt decided to stall. He didn’t need to worry. The Witcher let out a deep sigh and sunk down on the bed, elbows on his knees. “I want you.” When he looked up, his face was so open, so earnest, Jaskier knees almost gave out. “I want to be close to you at all times, I want to be on your mind at all times.” Geralt watched the bard come closer. “I want to kiss and touch you.” Jaskier chose to ignore the way his man’s voice had cracked in the middle there; instead, he made a place for himself between Geralt’s knees and forced him to sit up straight, lean back a bit even. “Geralt.” Jaskier cupped his face, brushed his thumbs along his cheekbones. The motion was so tender and loving and strange to Geralt, it send a shiver down his spine. “You are the most amazing idiot on this whole wide world, I swear.” Geralt watched his lips move, watched him smile so bright it could take out a vampire; he was mesmerized. “Geralt, you can touch me. You can also kiss me.” The words got stuck in his ear canal somewhere, because it took a second for Geralt to react. But then his hands lifted from his thighs to wrap around the back of Jaskier’s thighs, mapping the territory. “I can?” “Yes, love.” Bad choice of words. Jaskier squealed as Geralt hoisted him up and over his shoulder so he’d land on the bed with a hefty oof and a bounce. Geralt was upon him not much later, straddling him and holding his face in his hands. “Are you sure?” Jaskier scoffed and mirrored Geralt. The stubble on his cheeks tickled his palms as he answered: “No, you’re delusional, my friend.” A child would have noticed the sarcasm in his words. Geralt growled and kissed Jaskier. Finally. He grinned, giddy happiness filling him. He couldn’t believe it. And neither could Jaskier.   Their kisses were hot and messy, sloppy even. Hair was pulled, lips were nipped, it was harsh and wild. “Grind down on me, Geralt, come on.” Jaskier ran a hand down Geralt’s back and cupped his asscheek, then squeezed.   “I know you want to.” Geralt didn’t wait for Jaskier to maybe change his mind. He moved his hips, rhythm fast and hard immediately. He’d been holding back for too long, he just wanted to feel and hear and taste and see. “Fuck.” Jaskier moaned at Geralt’s curse, his stomach somersaulting. “Geralt, you’re so fucking hot. So precious too, fuck” It felt delicious, the way Jaskier’s bulge rubbed along Geralt’s dick and balls, caught just behind his balls, if he moved just right. He groaned into Jaskier’s skin, right underneath his jaw, where he left red blotches, little marks that would hopefully bloom into pretty bruises. He needed to leave his claim in a way that was impossible to miss. He had to. He buried his hand in his bard’s hair, the brown locks spilling from between his fingers. “You smell so good, Jask.” His senses were filled with both their arousal, precum, desire, love. “I want to make you smell like me, Jask.” The bard laughed, a deep chuckle that was music to Geralt’s ears. “Oh, you possessive idiot.”   He lifted his lips just a bit to rut against the Witcher. His eyes were half-closed, his lips shiny with spit and swollen from their aggressive kissing.   He shifted under Geralt, lazy smile on his lips. “I want you to fuck me.” The witcher froze, just for a second, before he cursed and scrambled off the bard. His hands fumbled with his breeches’ laces while he commanded Jaskier to undress as well. He looked up, white strands hanging into his eyes, hair completely disheveled. “Please,” he added.

Fuck, if that wasn’t a sign for the heavens. Geralt, big badass monster hunter, terrifying Witcher, had asked nicely and looked almost chastised while doing so. The bard had to be careful not to blow his load right then. They didn’t take long to undress. Clothing was flung to the floor, boots kicked under the bed when Geralt got on and crawled back to Jaskier. The bard was a sight for sore eyes, one hand on his thigh, the other was slowly stroking his dick. Geralt had to stare for a bit; fuck did he want to taste. Maybe later. He let his hands trail up Jaskier’s thighs, until he could bring them back around to his ass and haul him in, bring him closer. “You’re driving me crazy, bard.” “Good.” Oh, how smug he sounded. Jaskier procured a vial of oil from somewhere, Geralt had no idea. But he didn’t particularly care, there was barely enough blood left in his brain to think straight. Or as straight as he was able to. He took the vial with a sweet kiss on Jaskier’s lips. As he pulled back, his eyes fell upon the bard’s neck, mottled with spots and bites. Yes. Carnal possessiveness flooded his veins, and his cock started throbbing even more, precum dribbling from his tip. “Oh, how handsome you are, Geralt.” The bard ogled Geralts cock, then wiggled his hips. “Don’t make me wait.” “Yes.” Geralt snapped out of it, opened the vial and coated his fingers in the liquid. He wrapped one hand around Jaskier’s on his hip, then circled the bard’s rim. He clenched in anticipation, his hips moving again in an effort to make Geralt hurry up. “Geralt. Now.” “Oh, yes.” He pressed one finger in, surprised to find no resistance at all. Still, he took it slow, took his time, until Jaskier urged him on once again. “You will add another finger or I will do it myself.” And so he did. And they went in so smoothly, he almost lost his mind. Why was he so loose? Why was there no resistance? He should have to stretch him, what was going on? And then It hit him. He was already stretched. He’d had someone’s dick up his ass and it hasn’t been long enough to tighten back up. It also hasn’t been Geralt’s cock. A deep, vicious growl erupted from his chest, his fingers crocking and suddenly fucking into Jaskier at a mad pace. “Did you sleep with someone?” He grunted at one of Jaskier’s whines and spread his fingers, scissoring his bard’s hole. “Did you let someone else fuck you? Were you lying?” His voice was just as dark as his growl, the both of them layering and making Jaskier shiver underneath him. He tried to speak, but Geralt’s assault on him felt too good. He got a small break when Geralt shifted closer, latched onto his shoulder and buried his teeth there, probably leaving a very prominent mark. “No, I- ah. I fingered myself to the thought of you!” Geralt froze. He felt like his brain had been blown out, his heart crushed. He… what? Jaskier startled when Geralt suddenly pulled back with that blank, wide-eyed look on his face. They stared at each other, the bard too startled too move and the Witcher too shellshocked. Only when Geralt let out a low and breathy whine, almost like a hurt animal, did Jaskier remember his ability to move. He sat up slightly, reached for Geralt; did not get far. Geralt wrapped his hands around Jaskier’s hand and wrist, his other hand clenching at the bard’s hip. “Julian.” The mood toppled, shifted, desire burning in their veins like dry wood in the kiln. The were upon each other, skin to skin, Geralt back to fingering his bard, get him ready; he couldn’t wait much longer. It was hot, it was sticky and slick and if Geralt wasn’t gonna fuck him soon, Jaskier thought he’d have to die. “Come on, Geralt. Please.” Oh, and could he ever resist when Jaskier begged. Never.   He hooked one of his legs over his arm and rubbed the head of his cock against Jaskiers hole. “Breathe.” And then he pushed in. Jaskier’s eyes rolled back, his mouth fell open and he let out a choked gasp. Fuck, it was so much better than imagined. He was half sure he was babbling, but Geralt didn’t seem to mind or even notice. He just kneeled there, his fingers pressed into Jaskier’s skin as if he needed something to anchor himself. His eyes were closed, his head tipped back and his chest heaving. He drew in air, shakily, and when he exhaled, Jaskier’s body twitched.   His name had never sounded better than when it spilled from Geralt’s lips like a prayer, like something precious. “Julian.” A dam broke. Or a wall. Didn’t matter, something broke. Something gave way and Jaskier loved it. Geralt fucked into him without mercy, without caring if he left bruises or marks. He even kissed any red spots he could reach, murmured his possessiveness into Jaskier’s skin. And while Jaskier was absolutely on board with all of that, he felt almost overwhelmed. He’d loved for so long, careful not to let Geralt see. And now he was tangled with Geralt, on the bed, the sheets sticky and a mess, and it was exhilarating. He raked his nails down Geralt’s arm and bucked against him, tried to find a rhythm, but Geralt simply fucked him into submission. “Just take me, Jaskier, take all of me. You’re mine.” Fuck. Geralt shifted, bent Jaskier into half and adjusted his thrusts. Harder. Faster. Better. Jaskier was leaking precum, his dick now trapped between them and the friction drove him crazy. Absolutely crazy. Geralt held his legs in place, his forehead pressed against his calf as he took him apart. “You’re perfect. You’re mine. I’ll make you remember that.” A deep, rough growl revibrated through Geralts chest and Jaskiers body. He keened, threw his head back, begged. He needed release, he needed to cum. He needed it. “Please, Geralt. Please.” “Mine.” “Please.” Geralt picked up the pace; it became even more inhuman, animalistic. No mortal would have been able to keep it up. Jaskier himself felt like dying, his whole body overwhelmed and coiled tight. Geralt suddenly pulled out, just when Jaskier was about to break, and he flipped him around, manhandled him into a preferred position. He was like a blanket of fire along Jaskier’s back, the heat he radiated making sure his lover wasn’t getting cold. A soft kiss was pressed to Jaskier’ temple before Geralt sat up. He was positioned on Jaskiers now stretched legs. His cock, fat and swollen and leaking was situated between the bards asscheeks; the view was too nice. Geralt ran his hands down Jaskier’s back. His unmarred, unmarked back. No. Mark him, mark him up. Geralt shifted forward, his hands in the bedsheets next to Jaskier and his lips latched to the top of his spine. He licked and bit and grinded his cock against his bards ass, all the while growling and whispering praise. Jaskier felt so empty, and the grinding cock on his ass was the worst of teasing. He whined, pressed back against his witcher and raised his hips. “Don’t be fucking mean, get back into me already.” Geralt chuckled and bit the skin stretching over his shoulder hard enough to draw blood. “Patience, Julian.” Jaskier pressed his face into the sheets and wriggled in frustration. “Fuck.” He raised his hips as much as possible and reached down to take himself in hand; did not go well. Geralt stopped him with a hand wrapped around his arm and pulled it from between the bed and Jask’s body. “So, that’s how needy we are, huh?” He raised both Jaskier’s arms over his head and held them there with one hand. The other caressed his ass, squeezing and stroking in cirlces, before he smacked the left cheek. “You’re so needy, can’t even wait?” Another smack, the sting making Jaskier drool a bit. “Well then.” Geralt’s voice was so unbelievably gravely and bassy, Jaskier could feel every word he said in his chest. “Fuck, you’re so impatient.” He chuckled. “Take me then.” He pressed in, his thick cock breaching Jaskier once again, but the angle was different. The bard couldn’t not, he started moaning and pushing back, eager to take him in, to be filled to the brim. He wanted to cum, he needed Geralt to fuck him. And he did. Straight up resumed in the pace he’d left off earlier, the friction fucking delicious. His arms were still held hostage, therefore Jaskier didn’t have much room to move, but fuck, if that wasn’t half the appeal. “You’re mine, Julian. Mine.” Geralt murmured right into the bards ear. “Cum for me, my pretty flower.”

[crimsonhcadache]

      - ̗̀ NOW INTRODUCING:  IVES ❝ IVY ❞ SERRANO !

( DANNA PAOLA, CISFEMALE, SHE/HER, SCORPIO, 24 ) I just spotted IVES “IVY” SERRANO at the beach today. Don’t you know them? They live down by the TOWERS and usually hang out with the RICH KIDS & MUSICIANS cliques. From what I’ve heard, they can be DECEITFUL, but they’re also ADAPTIVE. I always think of them when i hear LAST LAUGH - FLETCHER and tend to associate them with STRAWBERRY CHAMPAGNE, A FRESH SET OF STILETTO NAILS, AND RED LINGERIE. ( tay, she/her, 22, est )

full name: natalie rose serrano ives serrano nicknames: ivy, poison ivy faceclaim: danna paola voiceclaim: lana del rey birthday: november 1st, 1996  zodiac: scorpio sun, aries moon, gemini rising sexuality: bisexual occupation: influencer, instagram model, musician, scammer / thief positive traits: effervescent, bold, creative, charismatic, coquettish, intuitive, ambitious, alluring, adventurous, perceptive  negative traits: cantankerous, deceitful, envious, manipulative, dramatic, stubborn, narcissistic, materialistic, reckless, quick-tempered character inspos: maddy perez euphoria, jackie burkhart that 70’s show, blair waldorf gossip girl, margo hanson the magicians, every lana del rey song ever, lucrecia montesinos and cayetana pando elite, rosa diaz brooklyn nine nine, the entire rose family schitts creek, jen harding dead to me

- ̗̀♡ — › background !

the main thing u need to know about ivy is that she is lying ! always !! her real name isn’t even actually ivy smh

she was born NATALIE ROSE SERRANO, to two working class parents in new york city. she knew from a young age that she was just supposed to be rich and famous, and that something had gotten mixed up somewhere and she was put in the wrong life.

in high school she got a scholarship to a fancy private catholic school, and that’s where she started to hone her craft of manipulating rich people. she would befriend all of the richest bitches at school and take advantage of everything that came along with it: vacations to far away places, stays in the family’s cabins and lake houses, even designer clothes that her friends no longer wanted and would gift to her, thinking it was their idea all along

as she grew up and got better at getting what she wanted out of people, her entitled attitude only got worse, driving a wedge between her and her parents, who kept waiting for her to develop a work ethic and kept being disappointed. a few months after she graduated high school, on her 18th birthday, her parents kicked her out of the house and cut her off, hoping that it would force her to grow up and take on any responsibility

but that plan backfired for them, her parents underestimating how truly stubborn natalie was. the day after her 18th, she wandered into a local strip club and got a job, figuring it’d be the easiest and quickest way to get some cash, and she took to it naturally and actually really enjoyed stripping

she started to embody an entirely new persona that she had created for herself, dancing under the name POISON IVY and telling everyone she was a trust fund baby that had been cut off from her rich parents, needing to dance to supplement her income, and her lies just continued to spiral out of control until she almost started to believe it herself. she had never told anyone at the club her real name, not even the other strippers, just going by “ivy” for a while.

she had learned to weaponize the power she had over people by being pretty and charming, using her looks for absolute evil and doing whatever it took to get money—from straight up pickpocketing, to making men buy her expensive gifts, to blackmailing, to sugar babying, to getting patrons wasted and manipulating them into tipping her absurd amounts… she did it all, very quickly earning enough to live the life she had always dreamed of, that she felt she deserved for whatever twisted reason.

she started posting on instagram with the name poison ivy generally just flaunting her carefree, extravagant life, often exaggerating or down right lying just to really dazzle her quickly growing audience

as she started to go down the influencer route, she realized she needed to do something to hide the skeletons in her closet ( the fact that she didn’t actually come from money and was making far more than was normal for even the best of dancers, a couple of small possession / shoplifting charges, and just generally anything that could lead people to her real identity ) so she started to tell people her name was ives, fully taking on the new identity. she even went so far as to make some of the people that had been closest to her sign NDAs about her real identity, making sure that no one could sell info about her should her plan of being famous work out

she also moved out to california to run away from everyone in the city that was starting to catch on to what she was doing, basically doing all the same shit but now in a New Place.. this was about 3-4 years ago, so she’s been in sunhollow for a while now doing the whole influencer thing !!

and it did work out !! at first she was definitely buying followers/likes to boost her likelihood of brand sponsorships, but eventually she faked it until she made it and actually attained influencer status. she then used her newfound internet fame ( and some classic blackmailing ) to get herself a record deal 

she also started sleeping around with pretty much any famous person she could, having very public relationships and breakups and scandals to keep her name in the press, which ultimately lead to more exposure/people following her, if only to see what she did next, which lead to even more sponsorships

eventually she stopped dancing and just focused on her influencing and more recently ( like... less than 6 months ago recently ) her music career. but she never stopped sugar babying and scamming rich stupid men, still very much using that as a means to keep up her lifestyle. she’s also done a few modeling things, but it’s mostly just like catalog work or being the face of a trendy campaign bc she’s way too short for the runway

she also recently made an only fans account bc she was bored one night and was mostly planning on posting once as a joke but then she made a bunch of money / got a bunch of subscribers and was like oh word ? i can do that ! so she will post on there from time to time but she’s not like… super serious about it ya know ? also her music label is big mad at her for it bc they’re like bUt yOuR rEpUtAtIoN and she’s like yeah.. but my bank account ? also it’s no secret she used to be a stripper so she rly just.. doesn’t give a fuck ! 

so basically she’s jus here making money being pretty and pulling a long ass scam on… everyone

- ̗̀♡ — › personality / headcannons !

she’s a real two faced bitch… she has perfected the art of becoming whoever she thinks other people want her to be, quickly adapting her personality to get whatever she wants

she’s usually pretty friendly actually, really charming and outgoing and just trying to have a good time

she has a pretty short temper tho and holds grudges like you wouldn’t believe, so once you’re on her bad side… good luck lol she is so ruthless

she’s like… deeply, deeply selfish and will always put herself first, but she’s so manipulative that she can make people do things that they think are their idea, but it’s really just something she planted in their head so it’s not always obvious

also very spoiled and will throw a mf fit if she doesn’t get her way or u say no to her

always going out !! always doing the most !! she’s the type to show up randomly at ur door at 8pm on a tuesday with a bottle of tequila and make u party with her whether u like it or not

she’s a lot smarter than she lets on sometimes, like she knows people expect her to be stupid and ditzy and shallow and she’ll let them underestimate her when it’s beneficial

always looks perfectly put together— her nails are always meticulously manicured, usually w stiletto shaped acrylics, and you’ll literally never see her outside her house without makeup and a perfectly composed outfit. it’s also a rare occasion that she’s not wearing at least six inch heels, trying to make up for bein so mf short ( she’s 5’3 )

she talks A Lot but is really good at saying a lot of words without actually saying anything, like you can be best friends with her for months and then just be like “i don’t actually know a single thing about her”

always up to no good and sticking her nose where it doesn’t belong !! she’s always got some sort of scheme going or getting in to some kind of drama

v much a hoe and v much proud of it, will sleep w just about anyone especially if she can get something out of it

also a serial dater !! she’s always hoping in and out of relationships and being rumored to be with a dozen people at once

most definitely calls paparazzi on herself, especially when she’s around other famous ppl but will never admit it

compulsive liar, she will literally lie about the dumbest things like she doesn’t even need a reason to lie she jus.. does

she has a luxury two bedroom apartment that she lives alone in ( one room is kinda a guest room but also mostly just a giant closet ) in the towers and the gag is she doesn’t even know how much her rent is bc one of her random sugar daddies pays her rent.. her power tbh 

- ̗̀♡ — › wanted connections !

hookups / flings / one night stands / fwbs all that shit !!

exes on bad terms … gimme drama pls

enemies / ppl she’s stolen from maybe… she would definitely deny it and say they’re jus jealous of her or smth stupid but that could make the feud worse

party pals !! like i said she goes out a lot and always somehow manages to make new friends and drag them into her shenanigans

on again / off again exes… i want the Angst so bad..

shallow friendships / influencer friends like they play it up a lot for insta bc they both have a pretty big following but they dont really... like each other that much ?? like they definitely seem to be a lot closer than they really are

pr relationships this could be past or present !! in the same vein as the last one except they pretend to date ( or maybe just act like they’re gonna date but never actually do ?? like to fuel rumors ) 

unlikely friends !! like ppl who are nice and sweet and Pure, she could use a lil good energy in her life

situationship / flirtationship like they’re super flirty and maybe hook up a couple times but everyone assumes they’re dating or like gonna date but they’re jus vibing. bonus points if one or both of them actually has feelings but can’t tell if they’re just friends / casually hooking up or if it could turn into something more.. im a slut for some mutual pining !!

neighbors … mb they hate her for always being loud n throwing mini parties OR maybe they join in

mean girl rivalries !!

someone she’s taking advantage of / stealing from without them knowing .. oof

partner in crime !!!

one sided crushes or like someone she’s stringing along smh

sugar daddies mb 😇

someone to put her in her mf place JDKDKD like they call her out on her bs and are like “i see what ur doing bitch stay away from my friends” type thing

idk anything really !! gimme all the messy plots ok :~)

[ughgclden]

bee, love, i am so happy you had a good first day, you deserve calm and loving days, and you deserve people, deserve friends. i’m so happy for you.

as for apologising, i’m a terrible hypocrite every time i tell you not to worry about it, as i also apologise for anything, most notably existing, but i want you to know you don’t have to apologise to me, i understand the impulse but there’s no obligation or anything.

i’m glad you’re feeling better, and that it was just a little ick, well not glad that you were ick but glad it wasn’t too bad.

when it comes to being in welton, i fantasise a lot about these things, i think something especially about boarding schools is appealing to me. being away. that’s why my plans are new york or wales or if my friend is to be believed, quebec. sometimes though, those realities all feel more and more like tissue paper soaked in water, just waiting for a reason to fall apart

i read really quickly, it’s probably an issue, i read red white and royal blue in about an hour and fifteen minutes. neil and i. kindred spirits. today at lunch i watched the last thirty minutes of dead poets society, going back to rewatch “i was good, i was really good.” like ten times.

imposter syndrome is slowly getting the better of me.

i actually dressed up as leia for the midnight premiere of the force awakens. i’m that person. if i’d been with you in the cinema i would have cried too, you’re not alone there, i cried watching it on the floor.

i don’t deserve the nice words you give me, but i’m happy i make you feel comfy and cosy, and ironically enough, writing with a quill or fountain pen never ends in pristine and unsmudged ink, you can thank my being left handed for that. i think there’s something nice about writing with fancy pens, maybe that makes me seem pretentious as well. oh well.

as for dps tattoos, if i can ever get any tattoos, i want the neil crown, “i was good, i was really good.” somewhere, probably my wrist who knows, and some art that alludes to the first unmanned flying desk set. among others. the “and still we sleep” thought, and the outline of meeks and pitts both sound so lovely. so so lovely. i really hope you can get every tattoo you wish. although your bank account may hate me for saying so /j i want more piercings, mainly on my ears, i have something of an earring addiction, my favourite pair at the moment is probably my howl drop earrings that look like howls from howls moving castle.

honestly the outfit/hair colour distraction rule is dumb. it’s dumb. i just don’t get it. abuse of power ig. and yeah. we were like hugging and sorta just leaning on each other while talking and the administrator got angry, for whatever reason. the straight couple making out behind us, she didn’t seem to mind, however. it’s dumb, and im glad i don’t go there anymore.

im clearly very articulate today (sarcasm) my mind is ehhhhhhhhhhh and feels like a squirrel laying on its stomach.

maybe i will call you ramona flowers, bee /j did you know the original name for pac man was puck man… /j hiding in the back of the music room to avoid a maths test sounds like something i would do. i say this, knowing full well that i’m such a neil kinnie that i end up feeling like a teachers pet because i want to do well, both for myself and simply to avoid trouble with my mum.

a new york times best seller, huh? well if i ever publish anything i’ll dedicate it to you, both for being the only person who thought i could be a storyteller, but also for being a lovely person in general.

sometimes one day after another feels impossible. tomorrow feels impossible. but oh well. i think younger me would be disappointed, to some degree. on the other hand, i think they’d think it’s cool how much i know. if nothing else, they’d love that i have a typewriter. also, i’m sure young you would be proud of you, i am. i’m so proud of you.

i mean bee, i could teach you to shoot a bow /hj YOU CAN WIELD A SWORD????? here i was thinking you could not possibly get cooler or hotter omg i’m in love /hj

thank you for being proud of me, really bee, thank you. and thank you for being the only one. i’m hardly changing the world, but i guess if i don’t burn out and lose this fight, changing a few points of views in the process of growing wouldn’t be terrible.

p.s. it’s certainly something, i feel bad because i always pull away from people when i get numb and it’s so new that me doing that could be detrimental to everything, but me forcing myself not to could have a bad effect on me. who knows what’ll happen. i’m just gonna try and keep them happy no matter what.

p. p. s. bee you brought this upon yourself /lh

all my love, bee, and that pun was the out of this world part of that sentence. you’re so cute omg.

that quote is beautiful, and since i, once again, had to translate french and smile about it, i’ll leave you with this

no importa que nos separe la distancia, siempre habrá un mismo cielo que nos una.

p.p.p.s. thank you for saying what you do, and i know that i don’t owe you anything, but writing to you is easy, and makes me happy, when i manage to get myself to sit down and think about it. i’m sending you back hugs, gentle forehead kisses and mugs of tea, a soft blanket and a narnia movie marathon, where we argue about how i am definitely not better than susan pevensie, but you almost certainly might be.

i’m so happy uni is going well thus far, love. and i hope you love your classes. learning.

thank you for everything bee.

yours, always,

star✨

star sweetheart, thank you so so much, honestly. i can't tell you how much that means - i know you said not to apologise, but an apology seems in order for the lateness of this message- im terrible i know /lh thank you sm though.

i'm writing this whilst listening to one of my favourite albums (hypersonic missiles by sam fender, if you were curious) and curled up in bed, so this really adds to the comforting vibes.

i'm with you on that, boarding schools do have a certain something about them, don't they? i hope you can get to one or all of these places in your life - i can speak from experience wales is especially beautiful, but i can really see you in new york, too. wherever you end up star, i truly hope you're happy there.

an hour and fifteen mins?!!? the fastest i've read something was a clockwork orange in two and a half hours or so- you are so strong star, i've watched that film 20+ times and only watched the last half an hour maybe 4 /lh

that is SO CUTE oh my god- i will admit, for it chapter two i did channel my inner bill denbrough and wore some flannel (i luv that limbo <3)

you deserve all of these words and more, i promise you. you deserve something a lot less clumsy, but i offer you my best. left handed.. you rly are neil huh? /j

all of those ideas; absolutely lovely. the i was good tattoo breaks my heart in the best way possible. im hoping you get all of these tattoos, love. you'd suit them more than anyone, i'm sure. those earrings sound like the coolest fucking things ever? i did have a pair that had a little vodka bottle on, but i lost one in a club and haven't gotten round to replacing them. i definitely want more piercings too,, my conch is looking pretty bare as of late...

that is just. so disgusting? im so- god that makes me so angry i can't even explain. i think i should punch all homophobes straight in the mouth, actually /hj

love, i bet younger you would be so so proud of all you've achieved. from only what you've told me, i am. they'd be over the moon at how intellectual, kind and strong you are, i know it.

I CAN!!! ITS ONE OF MY MOST ESTEEMED TALENTS!!! lets make a deal. you teach me to shoot a bow, i teach you to wield a sword.. we're giving very narnia power couple if i may say.. /hj

i will always be proud of you star, for even the smallest of things you achieve. you're actively making a difference and a change, take bringing this positivity into my life for example. you've got this, star. i know you have.

ps; im wishing you all the best my love, seriously. take every day as it comes, and listen to your mind and wellbeing. im sending you so much love

pps; that quote. is so fucking cute. god im breaking down,, its so pretty and so DHJHFJKNFKKN yeah.

this is me, making you a cup of coffee and your favourite comfort meal, with a kiss on the top of the head. we will have this argument - as much as i love susan, she's no match for you <33

all of my love and happiness, star. you truly are one of a kind.

if i may, i'd like to leave you with an excerpt from a poem i saw earlier that i fell in love with;

"and you laugh. / loudly- / head tipping back. / and while your eyes / are on the ceiling, / i am mouthing / something too heavy even / for this steady night to shoulder. / "this is not a joke." i mouth. / "love me. love me." - letters from medea, salma deera

[letsfluxshitup]

Okay I have slept and am signifcantly more coherent so! I do have more thoughts on the fic :] ik I should probably just comment these.... ON the fic.... but you know I’m already in this ask box so really I might as well just chill out here

I forgot to talk about it last night but I do like the mentioning of the whole Schlatt resurrection arc thing and the way it’s handled with these specific characters? Narratively you could have made Techno like ‘wait what no. don’t do that’ but in reality he WOULDN’T. It’s true that all everyone (w/ a couple exceptions) does is dictate what he’s supposed to do for them, or he gets manipulated into it, and I imagine that would be exhausting after awhile! And even IF resurrecting a dictator is, like, an objectively bad decision on Quacks’ part, it’s still his decision, isn’t it? Techno going off w/ Phil and not really siding with anyone else is a conscious decision on his part, and while it’s not like. Super explored in the fic I imagine Quackity has issues w/ his own level of control as well? Like, clearly he’s used to being bossed around for everything he does, and he wants Techno to be like Schlatt in the sense that he tells him exactly what he’s *supposed* to do, but the fact that Big Q is under the assumption that there’s an action he’s ‘supposed’ to take is flawed in the first place. This ramble got out of hand sorry I just LOVE how u portrayed this

‘“Oh? Quackity?” Philza paused, before whispering, “ The loud one with the messy wings? ”’ MDNDKDKD I LOVE U PHIL..... honestly the fact that Techno actively talks about Quackity to his dad is <3 but the fact that his biggest takeaway FROM Techno talking abt him is that he’s loud and his wings are a mess is even BIGGER <333 Techno why would you do Quackity like that

I’d LOVE to see more Philza and Quackity moments,, their dynamic is so fun (tho in a different way than Techno n Quackity’s) is and it makes me smile to read back over their stuff :] I love how Phil does get a significant amt of fun in fucking with Big Q (truly, like father like son) but still very clearly approves of him as a person? Like, I imagine Quackity isn’t really all that sure how Phil feels about him. ‘I’m pretty sure your dad hates me, dude.’ ‘What are you talking about?’ Techno asks, bewildered, ‘I’ve never seen him obviously like anyone this fast.’ Like, Phil would make it pretty obvious if he didn’t, I think? The man can be much scarier than what Quackers got rly it’s a blessing. I could probably rant abt their dynamic more but I’m a sane person I promise lol </3

Small thing but honestly with the way Techno clearly constantly takes care of Big Q’s wings for him bc he’d prefer to do it himself and then PHIL doing it I’m starting 2 think Quackity just. Doesn’t know how to groom his own wings. Like Techno he’s not a baby bird he should do it himself. But also... I care them :,] the fact that Techno can take care of Q’s wings and Quackity can braid Techno’s hair and they trust each other w/ that... I know the reasons for it are obvious bc Quackity trusts easily and Techno clearly doesn’t see Big Q as someone who could be a threat but it’s still making me soft,,

The little impromptu therapy make-up session was a rly good display of both of their characters :] Quackity’s awful at handling like, any tension whatsoever with anyone so him taking way less than a day to go ‘hhhrhdh can we talk it out’ even tho he hates talking about feelings? Like he’s making an attempt at maturity and Techno’s going w/ it even thi neither of them are really comfortable with all that :] they value their friendship sm no one talk to me

Also I agree w/ u on the Techno characterization thing! Techno can definitely do jokes and drop the serious murder man act every once in awhile but the way he plays his character is v like. Blunt in everything. He doesn’t rly lash out, his ideals are consistent, and even when he’s planning chaotic attacks on other people nothing abt the way he acts really changes it’s just,, Techno but you should probably run away rn. His personality rly should be given more kudos it’s lovely

This didn’t rly fit anywhere else in the ramble but I do love how clearly nervous the ppl in Techno’s family make Quackity. Like, it’s a little different w/ Tommy n Tubbo but they’re also? Literal children? And even Tommy has that ‘tall scary child’ vibe abt him whenever he gets worked up LMAO Like, you have Mr. Blade, who is very strong and could DEFINITELY kill you if he wanted to, Wilbur, who is a dramatic theatre kid but once he goes off the deep end it’s like. You might be able to take him in a fight but if he wants you dead he REALLY wants you dead, and Phil, who the other two clearly got the feral part of their personalities from and somehow manages to be even scarier despite the fact that he’s an all-around polite guy. Quackity is just a normal anxious dude can he please go five minutes w/o coming face-to-face with another generally terrifying figure in his life who could kill him easily but won’t bc he’s so small?? I love them :] u rly do have a good eye for dynamics!

Also I’m proud of u for sleeping the normal 8 hours!! But Xena :pensive: ma’am please get some rest it’s very important >:[

- Saturn 🪐

,mjxcnvm,vxnvfkdjf ilysm i love getting your thoughts heart FULL

- IM GLAD THE ‘BEING TOLD WHAT TO DO’ PART CAME ACROSS WELL I WAS REALLY WORRIED I DIDNT ARTICULATE IT GOOD ENOUGH :D

- noone: -- Techno: is anyone gonna bully quackity-;; i didnt consider the implications of philza knowing quackity bc hes loud and needs his wings groomed but now that youve brought this to light im KDSFKJDSFDLSKFJDSLKJFDS

- ALSO I WAS REALLY WORRIED ABT THE PHILZA PARTS IDK IF I SAID THAT BEFORE ADDING HIM TO THE STORY WAS KIND OF A RANDOM DECISION ALSKDJFLKSDJ

xenas last comment was the nail in the coffin when it came to adding phil oh my god alsdjkflsdkjfslkdfj

- “ they value their friendship sm no one talk to me “ Y E S;;; idk im really into character dynamics thats like “listen we need to figure it out i cant live like this ok” also characters who are just Bad at talking about their feelings are Good and Important To Me LKDJFLSKJFDSLKJF

- “ his didn’t rly fit anywhere else in the ramble but I do love how clearly nervous the ppl in Techno’s family make Quackity. “ YOURE MAKING ME WANT TO WRITE MORE SBI FAMILY DYNAMICS WITH QUACKITY IM ALSKJFASLDKFSDLKFJSDFK IF YOU (or anyone) HAVE ANY THOUGHTS OR PROMPTS HIT ME THE FUCK UP

- “ u rly do have a good eye for dynamics! “

I TRY REALLY HARD OK;;; character relationships are like . priority number one for me and it makes my heart so incredibly full when people point out that they like my dynamics ok i try so hard--

also im devastated to announce that for some reason last night me and xena apparently switched sleep schedules, she slept for a reasonable amount of time and i slept for like four hours lkajdflksjfdlksdfjsdlkjf sometimes i wake up at 5am and my brain refuses to let me sleep again </3

[gridoc]

Copy aand Pasted from discord but I'm soft for the enemies part of the enemies to lovers in the pirate au

i been thinking abt doc/grian in this au again and esp the more the enemies side to enemies to lovers and i think that its fun to explore it cause both sides grew up learning and having reasons to hate the other.

even if you see Doc growing up w TFC and Ren, even before TFC actually died from the navy he would have been against them- who knows what would have happened to doc if tfc didn't adopt him, and its not like navy was gonna help right? Even after when he lived w TFC, tfc may not have told them he is THE Pirate tfc but like ofc alluded his ideals onto him and ren.

so like? navy hating would have been like learned into doc esp if tfc was hiding from them. and then TFC is murdered my te navy. thats a big why doc became such a ruthless pirate esp towards the navy!!!!!

and also grian?? we dont rly have a backstory for him but any child would have learned to listen to the navy, and that they are the good ones and pirates are evil. cause ofc? and grian would grow up learning about evil pirates plungering ships and towns, stealing things, nothing in the good light! and grian would maybe grow up in the orphanage so becoming part of the navy is the only future he had, because what skills could he have gotten?

so at a young age he would have become part of the navy as a crew member. maybe as young as 12 or 13 the moment he started growing and could learn how to be on a ship, so even then he would have heard about actual stories about pirates, actualyl seen pirates and witnessed what they can do as he grew up on the sea around sailors and soldiers alike!!! jumping from different crew to differnet crew as he grew up fearing pirates.

so like! enemies!! and then they meet, and Grian defeats him and Doc lets him live. and thats the weirdest part. he lets him live. he could have tortured him, forced information out and have the rest of the golden goat throw him off deck.

but he doesnt!

and its cause he knows respect, and he promises his deals and he never backed on a deal, especially a duel and he done deals like this before, fight the big bad captain and you get let go. and doc never lost on a deal like this, never considered the opposite of the deal if he lost once! and it was weird, and he hated it.

he lost to some navy, and he should killed him after, protect his reputation and thats what his rational brain tells him days later, back to his old mindset.

the same with grian, he should have killed the pirate. he had the sword under his neck, and he had time to just stick into the pirate. but he didnt. he was scared, thats what he tells himself, or just the adrealine of the whole battle and wanting to see the cpatian suprised made him stop and not finsiht the job. and thats what he tells himself days later. back to a pirate hating mindset as he joins another crew once again.

and well? they meet again, and again and again and they dont die. neither of them. grian wins the duels, and maybe thats why he doesnt kill the pirate? because he wants to fight him and beat him over and over and over again.

and doc doesn't know why he keeps seeking him out, he thinks its because he wants to kill him. and everytime they duel, at the start, Doc comes with the intent to kill grian as so Grian too. but by the end, when Doc is back on the floor w the blade under his neck they dont. neither ever use the oppurtunity to actually kill eachother although the farther they are away and more time they are apart the killing and hatred is back in the new spot back into the mold.

so many times eachother fucked eachother over when seeing eahcother, grian called the rest of the crew for backup so many times, earning so many gunshots through doc as he runs away then has to recover for weeks. grian nearly drowned so many times as doc just keeps throwing him offboard or his crew. its not pretty and they know it and its how it should be. and they hate the feeling they have when they other is hurt.

cause they have some sort of weird bond, theyve seen and talked enough times to have this bond and they actually end up some sort of friends but this is not how it goes, the times they talked normally, accidently meeting in a bar and both too drunk to lift up swords they talk and they enjoy it and they laugh. and the next day they are back to fighting. and somehow the fighting softens, their is no longer an intent anymore and by the end when one trips and falls over soemthing they dont worry that a sword will be in their chest the next second and thye hear a laugh from the other isntead cause they tripped

and ??? well maybe it could have gone on and on like that. cause they were enemies and maybe without grian ending up on docs ship, without the close quarters and with an excuse not to fight anymore thats how they go to 'the lovers' part of enemies to lovers. cause they seen eachother everyday and actually finnaly are on the same level, even under the resentment and the attempts to remind eachother that they arent on the same side although in the technicallity they are at the time.