#too many guys are just the worst when they drink but I met my husband at a bar and it was the fact that he was FUN that made me give my num

[mylifeiscomics]

Part 85 - College AU

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Previous - TBC

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[rey-jake-therapist]

Lost Souls: chapter 2

Chapter 1 is here.

Summary:

"She knew it was foolish, but in that moment, it made her feel like she was in control again. She didn't have any expectations for anything to come of it, but she didn't care. At best, he would ask for her number and never call her. At worst, he wouldn't even bother because she was just a girl he picked up in a bar. And that was fine. He looked at her so intensely that her knees went weak." What would Mina refrain from doing what her husband seemed to do so easily? That's exactly what Mina thinks as Jake, the handsome stranger she met outside, comes back for her. Quickly, things get steamy... Too bad her past will abruptly get in the way.

Notes:

I've got to put a TRIGGER WARNING on this one: there will be a flashbacks of a rape that Mina went through in this chapter. It will be very brief and I don't go into details.

"You came back!" Mina replied, amused, before settling onto a barstool. She took off her coat, deciding to stay a little longer after all, and pretended not to notice her new "friend's" eyes following the movement of her coat and lingering on her bare shoulders.

"Yeah, I realized I gave you my favorite lighter," he said nonchalantly. "I miss it."

"Do you want me to give it back? I can do that," Mina offered cheekily.

"Nah, it was a gift! But you can have a drink with me, so I know where it is when I need it," he replied. "If you want to, of course."

"It's not like I have better plans," Mina admitted. "But I've been trying to get a drink for half an hour now. Do you think you can do better?"

The man chuckled. "Nothing could be easier," he claimed.

Here, in the mottled ambiance of the dimly lit nightclub, Mina could see him more clearly. He was incredibly handsome, with prominent cheekbones and a sharp jawline. His sharp blue eyes looked deep enough to get lost in. He knew he was attractive, as evidenced by his irritatingly smug smile. But as much as Mina wanted to wipe it off his face, she also didn't want him to leave. Not yet, at least.

And yet, Mina knew the type. Most likely a jerk. Everything about him screamed "I'm broken, I need to be fixed," but she had met too many men like him when she was younger. They were all so charming, with eyes full of empty promises, who took but rarely gave and were too lost to care. Mina had shed a tear or two over men like him before deciding to avoid them at all costs.

However, tonight was special. Nothing mattered anymore tonight, and how could he hurt her more than she already was anyway? Besides, he seemed to know the bartender, who approached them, swaying her hips and smiling - at him, of course - and Mina desperately needed a drink, maybe a fix even.

"Jake, it's been a while!" The beautiful, dark skinned brunette swiftly collected empty glasses from the bar, cleaning as she went.

Mina mentally noted his name, Jake. She liked the sound of it. It suited him.

"Has it really been that long? Did you miss me?" Jake asked, his voice sugary sweet.

The bartender laughed, admitting that she had missed him a little. Jake ordered a whiskey on ice and nodded towards Mina, signaling for her to place her order.

"She's been waiting for two hours, she's dehydrated! What are you paid for?" Jake teased, receiving a playful tap on the arm.

"Says the guy who serves pricey wines to snobby customers at a fancy restaurant! I bet you make twice my salary with your tips, you lazy bum," the young bartender retorted. "You couldn't last a day in a place like this!"

"Ahem," Mina cleared her throat. She appreciated their playful banter, but she was thirsty and eager to be served at last. She ordered a beer from the bartender, who apologized for being swamped with work. She returned shortly with their drinks and then went off to attend to other customers. But before leaving, she told Mina,

"Watch out for that guy!"

Jake looked mildly offended, but Mina just shrugged and responded after taking a sip of her beer, "Well, I'm not perfect either."

Jake gave her an intrigued look, but he was wise enough not to question her. Instead, he suggested they clink glasses, which Mina gladly accepted.

"So, Jake," Mina began. "You're a bartender at a restaurant. Is it your day off, or have you just finished your shift? By the way, I'm Mina."

"It's my day off. But like Corinne said, I'm a clown with an easy, overpaid job," he admitted, sounding almost proud. "But enough about me. Mina, Mina... What a lovely name. I don't hear it often, but it sounds familiar," he added.

“It’s from Coppola’s Dracula,” Mina explained, feeling slightly embarrassed. Jake looked surprised, prompting her to elaborate, “It's my mother's favorite movie. She watched it while she was pregnant with me. It's about Mina, who's believed to be the reincarnation of Dracula's dead wife. My mom ate that stuff up,” she chuckled nervously.

“I remember that movie. There are lights of red in your hair.. Isn't the redhead girl called Lucille, or Lucy? Something like that?” Jake inquired.

“Yeah, Lucy! I suppose my parents didn't want to name me after Dracula's whore,” she laughed nervously again before taking another, larger sip of her beer.

Mina suddenly realized how long it had been since she last talked to a stranger. It was exciting and refreshing, but she couldn't shake the feeling that she sounded like a dimwit and that Jake would soon abandon her to find someone more intriguing to chat with.

She froze as she noticed something unexpected. When Mina paid attention to a man's eye color and his ring finger, it meant she liked him a lot, which was why her heart skipped a beat when she saw a ring on Jake's left hand.

“I didn't think you were married!” Mina feigned relaxation, but her heart wasn't in it. It was one thing to mess up her own marriage, but it was another to ruin someone else's.

“Married? Since when? With whom? Why didn't anybody tell me?” Jake asked, astonished but also amused at her claim. He seemed genuinely surprised, so Mina pointed to the large ring on his finger, which, upon closer examination, looked more like a signet ring than a wedding band.

“What's this?”

Jake quickly looked at his ring, then burst into laughter.

“Oh, this! Okay, it's on that finger, but it's not that type of ring. It's a gift from a young lady who's very dear to me, and I'm never going to take it off. I can't, I promised her.” He explained with a solemn tone.

“I see,” Mina whispered, not entirely satisfied with the answer. “And why aren't you with her instead of having drinks with a stranger in a bar?” She teased him.

Jake winced.

“Because it's already late, and she's probably asleep now, dreaming of princesses or whatever else twelve-year-old girls dream about,” he explained earnestly.

Mina groaned but couldn't help but laugh. Jake smirked and continued, “It's from my goddaughter Emily. She gave it to me two years ago to protect me. See, there's a cat! She says I'm like a cat because I never answer her father's calls but show up whenever I want to. She's a clever one!”

His smile grew wider as Mina's face turned red. She giggled and admitted, “I suppose I look foolish now.”

“No, you look jealous. It's alright. I like that,” he teased her, his smug grin returning. She rolled her eyes but didn't protest. She smirked and finished her beer instead. She was so thirsty that she had drunk it quickly, but she knew it wouldn't be enough.

“Speaking of…” he paused, mimicking the gesture she had made moments earlier. “…wedding rings, I have eyes too. What brings you here?”

Mina smirked and let out a long, weary sigh.

“It’s complicated,” she conceded.

Jake appeared receptive, even ignoring a phone call to give her his undivided attention. Mina shared fragments of her recent history, carefully chosen. She recounted her husband's infidelity and the searing betrayal she had experienced due to the unique circumstances. She also confided in him about their dysfunctional relationship and her urgent need for distance. She even admitted she wasn't entirely certain she wanted to return home anymore, not after the conversation she had had with Johnny earlier. She withheld certain details she had only divulged to Keisha. Disclosing all these facets of her life to a stranger was much easier than she had anticipated, Mina realized with a sense of satisfaction. Perhaps it was due to the numbness she had felt after her last conversation with Johnny, but she no longer felt anything at all. It was so liberating...

Jake was a good listener. He abstained from offering any commentary or guidance, which she was grateful for, but suggested that she might need something stronger than a beer.

"I loathe whiskey if that's what you're implying," Mina retorted, wincing at the thought.

Jake leaned closer and whispered with a seductive tone that sent shivers down her spine, "Nah, that's not what I had in mind. Do you trust me?"

Mina arched her eyebrows.

"Trust you? Trust you for what?"

Jake didn't respond, a behavior she instinctively identified as his modus operandi.

He summoned Corinne again with a commanding voice, already shouting for the second time. Even though the bartender cast an irritated look his way as she was already serving other patrons, she hastened over to them. Mina smirked, still pondering what Jake had in mind.

"Still here?" Corinne teased Jake. "Shouldn't you be with your girlfriend by now on Valentine's Day?! It's already past eleven, her shift must have ended by now!" She teased him, before winking at Mina. Mina was slightly disconcerted to learn that he had a girlfriend, but Jake's flustered expression was too comical not to chuckle.

"What girlfriend?" Jake queried, feigning ignorance but sounding unconvinced.

"You're asking me? Simone told me that you have a new girlfriend from the restaurant! I trust Simone when it comes to you. Plus, I know you've slept with all your coworkers, so it was just a matter of time before you banged the newbie!" Corinne added, while serving another client, who had taken advantage of her availability to order a drink.

“Ouch, bad idea…”Mina couldn’t help but comment on the ongoing discussion between Corinne and her new friend.

“You know Tess?” Corinne asked with curiosity.

Mina wondered for a few seconds what made her think that and looked puzzled, then shook her head and replied after an embarrassed giggled,

“Absolutely not, I’m not even from here. I was just saying, it’s always a bad idea to date a coworker. For me, at least! I never do it. It’s surely fine as long as everybody’s having fun, but it can quickly turn a workplace into hell on earth. I saw it happen too many times!” She added.

"Thank you!” Corinne exclaimed, before pointing a varnished nail on Jake. “See? It’ll cause you trouble someday. But don't come here to complain, ‘cause I’ve warned you!”

As Jake scoffed but side-eyed Mina, who grinned mischievously in response, Corinne continued,

“Anyways, Simone: she said that girl had spent the year chasing you, what took you so long? Oh, and that you'd probably break her heart. She also said it wouldn't be her problem, this time. Are you at odds with Simone? She seemed pretty upset a couple of days ago…

"Simone's full of shit," Jake grumbled. His smug smile was gone and he looked uncomfortable. "If Tess was my girlfriend, I would be with her, it's that simple. We're just having fun. That's it! Now can you be a doll and bring us two shots of tequila with lemon and salt? Please?" He then asked, slightly aggressive, and visibly nervous.

Corinne must have felt the sudden tension he displayed, as she grew cold and served them what he asked.

Mina, who had wisely remained uninvolved in the strife that opposed Corinne and Jake, raised her eyebrows when she heard his order.

"Tequila?" She asked, an ounce of skepticism in her voice.

"Yep! That's why I asked if you trusted me. I intend to get you really drunk tonight because my gut tells me you need that, but I need you to be comfortable or… it won't work," Jake explained, mischievous. He then took off his jacket, revealing a white t-shirt and an athletic torso.

"Honestly, it's way too early to trust you yet. Good luck for getting me drunk though, I'm a tough one,"

Mina then smirked and licked the skin between her thumb and her forefinger before sprinkling a small pinch of salt onto this area. Jake imitated her. They both licked the salt and raised their glasses to clink, downed their tequila shots and bit their limes, eyes locked on each other. Mina always enjoyed the sourness of the lime on her tongue and how it broke with the bitterness of the tequila. And she was enjoying Jake too, a little bit too much.

Another round of shots followed, then a third one, a fourth, a fifth... They chatted about everything and nothing: Mina especially caught herself being chatty about her current situation, while Jake remained very quiet about his.

After each round he came closer to her and almost never broke eye contact, except to look at her lips. His eyes, made of the deepest blue, seemed to gaze directly into her soul and made her feel weak, in a strangely good way. She knew now he wanted to kiss her as much as she did, and enjoyed the delicious feeling of being desired but wanted this moment to last as long as possible. Everytime she met someone she liked, this moment between the first words exchanged and the first kiss was the moment she preferred. There was nothing at stake yet, nothing life changing anyways. It was a comforting realization that if they parted ways now, no harm would be done.

Perhaps, in the future, they would reflect on this brief encounter with fondness. The moment was a respite from the pressures of life and the uncertainty of what the future held.

Mina felt a strong urge to touch Jake's bare arm as it casually rested on the bar, but an invisible string seemed to hold her back. She relaxed a bit when Jake pointed out her inhibition and began to giggle. “Mind you, I’m still not drunk. Only jetlagged!" she claimed, before laughing out loud as Jake put on a skeptical face. She revealed that she had been working as a waitress at a fancy restaurant for six years, but had decided to pursue a professional reconversion. After much contemplation, she had decided to return to her abandoned informatics studies and found a school. As she had experience in hacking, she explained to Jake that it seemed only logical to specialize in cybersecurity and pursue “a more lawful path”, as she proclaimed with a touch of mock solemnity in her voice.

It seemed to impress Jake, especially when she disclosed that she had hacked into her school's computer network at fifteen to lower her ex-boyfriend's grades after catching him cheating on her. Not stopping there, she had also exposed the illicit pictures stashed on her math teacher's hard drive, involving underage students.

“I would have never guessed. You don't strike me as a computer geek at all,” Jake pointed out.

Mina scoffed. “You mean I don't fit the stereotype? We're not all like Sheldon from Big Bang Theory!” She playfully teased him. “My stepfather’s a computer engineer and a genius who once hacked the FBI just for kicks. So, I don’t really have much credit; he taught me… Everything.” She emphasized the word ‘everything’, but Jake was way too impressed to catch on.

“He did what, for kicks?!”

“It was a bet with a friend,” Mina responded, shrugging.

No longer wishing to dwell on the topic of her stepfather, she abruptly turned to the bar and, after a few minutes of waiting, ordered another round of tequila shots. Jake seemed to sense she was shutting herself down, so he proposed they head to the lounge for a smoke. Mina cheerfully agreed. She knew she would quit smoking again eventually, but now was not the moment to exercise prudence.

The smokehouse was as crowded and smelly as Jake had described it. It was so cramped that moving without bumping into someone was difficult, and Mina had to apologize three times before they found a corner where they could smoke and talk quietly.

Jake stood so close to Mina that she could still smell his intoxicating cologne. His presence and the way his deep blue eyes stared into her soul were captivating. Mina still had Jake's lighter, so she lit his cigarette. They exchanged a brief smile as they puffed on their cigarettes, but Jake's phone started ringing again. Although he groaned and seemed reluctant to answer, Mina saw the name 'Tess' on the screen and felt empathy for this girl she didn't know at all.

"Why don't you pick up? You could say that you're busy and not interested in seeing her, perhaps? She might be worried about you," she said with a voice she wanted to sound severe.

Jake expressed his disapproval with a scoff, although Mina could sense a hint of regret in his sour expression.

"She shouldn't," he grumbled. Despite his reluctance, he eventually answered his girlfriend's call after an exasperated sigh.

"Yeah, I missed your call. Sorry... I'm not going to the Home bar tonight, babe. No, I'm at home. I was just dozing off. Why? There's music playing because I turned it on. Are you doubting me now? ‘Cause this shit ain’t gonna fly with me, you know that!"

Mina found it amusing how Jake was trying to avoid his inquisitive girlfriend's questions, but she suddenly remembered her obligation to her best friend and her baby.

"Christ! I forgot about my best friend and her baby," she whispered as she slapped her forehead.

Jake looked confused, but he was still busy arguing with the girl over the phone. Mina pulled out her phone from her bag and switched it on for the first time since she had returned to the Omega Lounge.

She dreaded what she might find on her phone. She had hung up on her husband and hadn't given him a chance to call her back. She knew that there would be at least one, if not several messages waiting for her, but she wasn't in a rush to find out.

The first text was from Keisha, who informed Mina that everything was fine and that she, Ewan, and Zahra were back home. Mina felt slightly guilty for not responding to Keisha's message, but she promised herself that she would make it up to her friend in the morning.

The second message was a voicemail from Johnny. Mina took a deep breath and listened to it while Jake was still on the phone arguing with his girlfriend. She thought she was prepared for the worst, but she had clearly underestimated Johnny's anger. The atmosphere in the smoking lounge was hot and stifling, but Mina couldn't help but shiver as she heard her husband's voice tearing down their marriage, calling it a "scam," and regretting the day he had met her. He also said he was happier with Lyla than with her, claiming that it was only natural for him to laugh and communicate with someone, something he had always found impossible to do with Mina. Johnny repeated that he had never been happier or felt more free than he did now that she was gone, and urged her to stay in New York and never come back.

Despite knowing that Johnny was only trying to hurt her as revenge for her sudden departure, Mina was overwhelmed with emotions and tears streamed down her face. She wanted to stop the pain, but her fingers seemed frozen on her phone. When the voicemail finally ended, and the artificial female voice informed Mina that there were no new messages, she wordlessly dropped her phone into her purse.

" The child is grown

The dream is gone

I have become comfortably numb, " she heard Pink Floyd sing in her head.

Mina finally became aware of Jake's genuine concern as she turned to him, her eyes now awash with tears. She realized he must have finished his conversation long ago, and her heart sank as she wondered for how long he had watched her.

"Is everything okay? Did you get bad news?" Jake inquired, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. Mina recoiled and stepped back, overcome with emotion. She turned away from him, ashamed of her tear-stained face. She had hoped to keep her emotions in check, but Jake's kindness had opened the floodgates, and she began to sob uncontrollably.

"I need to go to the bathroom," she choked out between sobs. "Please watch my things. I'll be right back."

Mina did not look back to see Jake's reaction. She knew it was risky leaving her purse with a man she barely knew, but her intuition told her he was not a thief and wouldn't leave before she returned to the smokehouse. Being alone in this unfamiliar place scared her more than the thought of her money being stolen. She rushed through the crowded nightclub, determined to find the bathroom.

As she gazed at her reflection in the mirror, Mina was appalled to see mascara streaks running down her cheeks, giving her the appearance of a haunted, grey-eyed witch. She quickly wiped away the smudges and tried to tame her wild curls, which she hated. They reminded her of him - the man who used to love them. She scrutinized her cleaned face in the mirror, taking note of her striking features - her glamorous curls, her perky cheeks, her full lips and her big grey eyes made her undeniably pretty. Mina knew Jake would eventually invite her to his place for a final drink, but she was unsure if she was ready to take that leap. What seemed so simple to others always terrified her, raising questions she wasn't sure she was prepared to answer.

Mina longed to retrieve her phone from her bag to listen to Johnny's voicemail again, but she remembered she had entrusted her purse to Jake and shook her head in frustration. The realization that she might lose not only her means of payment and identification but also Keisha's and Johnny's phone numbers paralyzed her. She had never bothered to memorize Johnny's number or backup her contacts online. If Jake decided to abscond with her purse, she would be stranded and forced to file a complaint that would most likely be futile. She imagined herself on the street, standing at her apartment door, begging Johnny to let her in and confessing she had made yet another mistake. She recalled his harsh words echoing in her mind - "You always think you're better," "Find someone who loves you more," "I knew her better in two days than you in three," "You say we're toxic, but you're toxic," "Don't bother coming back…"-

Suddenly, Mina was jolted from her reverie by the sound of female voices, signaling the arrival of other women in the bathroom. Without a second thought, she retreated into one of the stalls and waited for the strangers to leave. But to her dismay, it soon became evident that the young women were here to stay, snorting cocaine away from prying eyes. Hearing these familiar sounds stirred up old demons in Mina, reminding her of a time when she would take anything that could be snorted or injected, without any regard for herself or others.

The temptation to join in became too strong, and she couldn't resist leaving the stall to ask the girls if they had any left to sell her. She explained that she didn't have her purse, but her boyfriend was waiting for her in the smoking lounge with it. She offered to pay them there, and to her surprise, one of the girls, a brunette, offered her the remainder of the cocaine with a smile, insisting she didn't need the money.

Mina felt a twinge of guilt as she walked back to the lounge, knowing she was on the brink of falling back into her old habits. But as she caught sight of Jake's handsome face in the crowd, all her reservations dissipated. He was smoking, as usual.

"Hey, I'm back!" she exclaimed, relieved to see him.

Jake teased her, "Long time no see. If you hadn't left your stuff here, I would have thought you ran away!"

Mina couldn't help but smile, and impulsively snatched the cigarette from his mouth and put it in the ashtray.

Taken aback, Jake didn't resist when Mina pulled him towards her and kissed him. It was a brief, impulsive kiss, but the delighted surprise in Jake's eyes made it all worth it. She knew it was foolish, but in that moment, it made her feel like she was in control again. She didn't have any expectations for anything to come of it, but she didn't care. At best, he would ask for her number and never call her. At worst, he wouldn't even bother because she was just a girl he picked up in a bar. And that was fine. He looked at her so intensely that her knees went weak.

"I've been wanting this for a while now," Mina admitted with a tender smile.

"I've been wanting this since the moment I saw you," Jake whispered huskily.

He brushed her lips gently, teasingly, sending shivers down her spine. She knew he was testing her. As the tip of his nose brushed her cheek, Mina opened her mouth, inviting him in. Emboldened, Jake's arms wrapped around her, enveloping her in his warmth. He pushed her roughly against the wall, and Mina moaned as he deepened the kiss. She clung to him, running her hands under his shirt and across his soft, sensitive skin. He shuddered and grabbed her hands, raising them above her head.

"Slow down, we're in a fucking smoking den," Jake whispered, followed by a short laugh.

Their breaths were heavy and loud as a growing fever took over them. Jake pushed her against the wall, still keeping her hands up and locked, and gave her another passionate, deep kiss. He wasn't just kissing her but devouring her like a feisty meal. His lips tasted of cigarettes, whiskey, and danger. Mina almost lost herself when he began to focus on her neck, licking and biting it. He was everything she had tried to escape from for years, but it was too late to turn back now. Not that she wanted to.

Recalling what she had in her pocket, and suspecting that Jake was a user, Mina gently pushed him away and, showing him a naughty smirk, revealed the small pouch of cocaine given to her by the girl she met in the bathroom.

"Hey, look what I found... interested?" she asked.

Jake raised his eyebrows and claimed he did not expect her to be into drugs, to which she replied that she was full of surprises. He then stated that he knew of a place where they would not be disturbed, and before Mina could ask where it was, his knuckles were sliding against hers and her hand was in his. She felt a warm rush over her whole being as he pressed his palm against her own and led her through the dancing crowd to a staircase she had not noticed before. She attempted to get an explanation from Jake, but he only encouraged her to follow him, his hand still holding hers.

They found themselves in front of a door that Jake opened and closed behind them as Mina entered. The room was dominated by a large table with eight chairs that occupied almost all of the space. Only a green plant in the corner provided a bit of cheer, but it was clearly parched. Mina watched Jake remove his jacket in silence and toss it onto the nearest chair back.

"It's a conference room," Jake announced. "They sometimes rent it during the day to companies that require a venue for their meetings," he explained.

"I thought you didn't like it here, but it seems you know every dark corner of this place!" Mina scoffed. She took off her coat slowly, relishing the sensation of his hungry eyes devouring her.

"I didn't say I wasn't offered a tour once or twice," Jake retorted.

"By Corinne?"

"Possibly…"

Jake grasped her by the waist and pulled her firmly against him. Mina squirmed, but suddenly her husband's face appeared in a corner of her mind, condemning her. Mina froze and shied away from his lips. Then she remembered that Johnny had done far worse. Keisha's advice was: “have fun”. Keisha would probably not approve of her using what she had in her pocket, but she was not present to stop her.

Mina shook the small pouch of white powder under Jake's nose.

"Guests first!" she quipped, with a small smile at the corner of her lips.

Jake chuckled, but took the pouch and used his credit card to prepare two lines. He then snorted the first one before making way for Mina. She hesitated for a few seconds, too brief for Jake to notice that she was not as confident as she seemed, but enough for her to convince herself that she was in control. She had quit drugs seven years ago when she met Johnny, who had been a tremendous support in helping her stay away from drugs. There was no danger of her relapsing. Not for one line... She wanted that line, and she wanted that man.

Everything will be fine.

As Mina swiftly snorted her line of cocaine, she sensed Jake's eyes fixed on her. The sensation of the drug infusing into her bloodstream was all too familiar, as if she had never stopped doing it. She felt instantly rejuvenated and more self-assured.

Suddenly, she gasped as Jake lifted her hair and delicately caressed the small hairs at the back of her neck. She knew he was teasing her, but she relished the attention. A shiver of pleasure ran down her spine when his finger traced a line down her bare back, only to be halted by the barrier of her synthetic dress.

"You've got a tattoo down there," Jake murmured, his breath hot on her neck. "Is it a cherry tree?"

"It's a cherry branch," Mina replied, smirking. "It runs all the way down to my lower back."

"Nice, can I see it?" he asked, toying with the zipper of her dress. Mina's heart raced as she gripped the table with her hands, but she still answered weakly, "Sure..."

She heard Jake's breathing quicken as he unzipped her dress and pulled it apart to reveal the tattoo it concealed. He traced the pink flowers and followed the light brown line of the branch. Mina bit her lip in excitement, allowing Jake to continue. He pressed his body against hers and slid a hand under her dress to caress her thighs, while his other hand went to her shoulder and slowly slipped the straps of her dress off. Mina bit her lip harder, shivers running down her spine as Jake's fingers followed the curves of her body down to her hips.

"Your skin is so soft," Jake whispered into her ear with a deep, hoarse voice, before his mouth ravaged her neck with sudden, passionate kisses. Mina let out a cry of pleasure, which turned into a long moan when he pulled her hair to gain better access. She squirmed and pushed her hips against his erection. Jake growled and bit her tender skin, then slipped a hand into her panties. Mina stopped him, however, and turned to face him, eager to touch him as well.

She realized his eyes were a dazzling shade of cobalt blue as he looked at her breasts and whispered, "You're gorgeous..."

They exchanged a brief smile before Mina pulled his face towards hers and kissed him passionately. She then cheekily asked, "You don't expect me to be the only one like this, do you?"

Mina fiddled with Jake's shirt, indicating that she wanted him to take it off. He chuckled, but complied, revealing a torso and arms covered with tattoos and inscriptions. Mina blushed and ran her fingers over his silver necklace, stroking his chest hair before drawing him close and kissing his neck with the same fervor he had shown her. Jake moaned with pleasure, sliding his hands back under her dress and pulling her panties down to her feet. Mina gasped with excitement as he lifted her effortlessly onto the table.

"Spread your legs," Jake ordered.

Panting, dripping wet, Mina obeyed without a word.

"Good girl," he murmured, smirking.

"Don't be so sure of that…"

Jake’s smile grew larger. He dove on her to steal a kiss. Grinding her against the table in a tight embrace, he then put a hand between her legs. Feeling her wetness, he groaned with satisfaction and toyed with Mina’s desire for a few seconds, visibly enjoying the sight of her squirming and the strangled sounds that came from her mouth. Her moans intensified when he slid first one, then two fingers inside of her. She circled his waist with her legs and bit his shoulder to smoother the waves of pleasure that shook her to the core while he kept circling her clit. When she felt the orgasm coming, she pulled on his hair while her nails digged on his flesh so hard Jake let out a small scream followed by a brief laugh.

And then, as unexpected as it was unwelcome, the first flashback came.

The sound of another laugh, a way more sinister one, followed with the vision of her stranded on the hood of a car, helpless and terrified. ‘No!’

Mina blinked to chase the vision away. She kissed Jake and whispered in her ear,

"Fuck me,"

Jake met her words with a grunt of approval but kept caressing her, letting Mina unbuckle his belt and drop his pants to reveal his thick hard member. She took it in her hand and started stroking, making him moan and groan while he looked for a condom in the pocket of his jeans. Jake then pushed her down the table and lied on top of her, panting and grunting. Mina gasped, once again taken aback by the violence of his moves. She didn't dislike it, but she was once again unpleasantly distracted by another flashback.

Her shirt brutally ripped off her chest. A slap on the face, and injunction:  "Shut up!"

Mina tried to close her eyes and shook her head to kick the memories out. But it didn't work; soon, she couldn't tell if she was still in the conference room of the Omega Lounge with Jake, or battling with two men in an isolated parking lot in Los Angeles. She felt Jake's hands on her but could only hear a voice that haunted her nightmares for weeks,

"Hold that bitch down ".

" No," she whined. She begged, swore she wouldn't tell anybody. But he wouldn’t stop hurting her. He had told his friend he'd be next. "Just hold her down!"

"No, please stop it!" she screamed, forgetting where she was. “Just stop!!" She yelled again, trying to push an invisible enemy away.

Dumbfounded, but quick to react, Jake stood up immediately and retreated, taken aback. When Mina recovered her senses and saw his face showed no anger but only deep concern, shame took over her as she swiftly jumped off the table. Jake asked what happened but she shut him down and put her clothes back on as quickly as she could, all while avoiding eye contact with him. She was mortified, unable to speak after what was one of the most embarrassing moments in her entire life.

"Mina, don't…"

"I'm sorry, it's not your fault. I'm so, SO sorry," Mina abruptly interrupted Jake, before storming out of the conference room. She stubbornly ignored Jake as he tried to stop her and ran down the stairs so fast she almost missed a step. 

Barely conscious, Mina tried to run through the merry crowd of the Omega Lounge, but was slowed down by the dancers who bumped into her. She was crying and probably looked like a freak, Mina thought, but she didn't care about that now. She only wanted to leave the damn place but was still too disoriented to find her way out. The beats of the music resonating in her head were so loud it gave her a headache, and her head was spinning. Mina soon felt sick as if she was going to puke and the shivers on her arms made her realize at last she had left the conference room without her coat. She let out a groan of frustration as her empty hands also told her she had left her purse there. .

"I just need some fresh air. I'll go look for them after. Jake will probably be gone.

Feeling her cheeks were wet with her tears, she calmed down and dried them, then spotted the main entrance of the nightclub and walked decidedly towards it.

Just as she was going to open the large heavy door guarded by the tall and hulking Tony, a hand firmly grabbed her arms and stopped her progression. Taken aback, she abruptly pulled away and turned around to find herself in front of Jake, whose handsome face showed concern and disbelief.

"He must think I'm crazy,"

Mina still refused to meet his eyes, certain that she would die of shame if she did.

"Look I said I'm sorry," she muttered between clenched teeth, "I don't know what to tell you! It has nothing to do with you. I just want to go home now." She bit her lower lips as she realized she had said the word 'home', despite knowing that where she was coming back to was nothing like 'home'.

Tony, Keisha's friend who Mina had met the first time she had entered the Omega Lounge and had told her she could ask him anything, put himself between her and Jake and asked her, not before throwing a cursory glance at Jake who rolled his eyes,

"Are you alright? Does he bother you?"

Mina opened her mouth to speak, but was abruptly interrupted by Jake, who ignored Tony and addressed her with undisguised impatience.

"I thought you might need these," he said, proffering the black coat and handbag he had been carrying under his arm. They belonged to Mina, and she felt her face turn crimson with embarrassment. Jake could have simply left her things on a chair and forgotten about her, but instead, he had chased after her.

Mina was flabbergasted and stuttered out an incoherent apology as she put her coat on. She stared at the floor, praying that it would open up and swallow her whole. However, Jake's tone softened, and he said, "You need food."

Mina was puzzled and asked, "What do you mean?"

"When was the last time you ate something?" Jake replied, his concern evident.

Mina scoffed but then had to admit that she hadn't eaten a proper meal since she had boarded the plane to New York. "I don't know… Does a cookie for lunch count?" she asked with a tired voice.

The shadow of a grin passed over Jake's lips. He suggested that she head to a nearby burger joint, which he described as "not bad." After an awkward silence, punctuated only by the loud electronic music blasting through the nightclub speakers, Jake wished Mina a good night and left the Omega Lounge.

Mina stood dumbfounded for a few seconds and stared at the large entrance door, her mind blank. Then, driven by an impulse, she left the nightclub and spotted Jake's tall, lean silhouette already far away from the Omega Lounge. She didn't know why, but she ran after him.

"Jake, wait!" Mina shouted, running as fast as she could to catch up with him.

Let me introduce you to the characters Mina and Jake

Chapter 3 is up here!

[rejaytionships]

archive: second rosemary fic from may 2022 (unfinished)

[cw for nsft comments]

---

“Hi, Valerie!”

Two of Valerie’s closest friends — Iris and Harley — decided to stop by for a visit now that they were finally allowed to be in the house. It wasn’t that Roy disallowed it; it was just not an environment Valerie felt comfortable having guests inside of.

“Come on in!” Valerie smiled widely. “I’ve got some water in the kettle, I hope you girls are thirsty for some raspberry tea.”

“Oh boy, I could kill for some right about now,” Iris huffed.

Harley nodded in agreement. “Me too!”

Valerie motioned the two women inside; they sat down at Valerie’s kitchen table as she poured everyone a cup with a tea bag. She sat down, handing out the mugs.

Harley took a sip from her drink first. “So,” she started, “how’s everything been without…”

“Without Roy around?” Valerie absent-mindedly stirred honey into her drink. “Honestly, I’ve been a little nervous he’ll come to haunt me,” she half-joked. “Other than that, though, it’s a big relief sleeping in peace for once. Finally getting that well-deserved beauty sleep!”

“That’s what it’s all about!” Iris cheered. “He was such a total freak.”

“Tell me about it,” Valerie mumbled, taking a swig from her mug. “He was so hung up on the whole having many kids right away sort of thing. I wanted kids and all, but he was literally out of his mind about it, he acted like it was my only purpose.” She grimaced. “Not to mention, with all the sex he’d make me have with him, you’d expect him to get good at it eventually, you know? What a let-down all around.”

Harley snorted. “That’s so crass,” she giggled. “Was he really that bad?”

“Horrible.” Valerie rolled her eyes. “Consent issues aside, I could probably count on one hand the amount of times I actually enjoyed it.”

“You know,” Iris added, “considering his little affair, shouldn’t you get… tested?”

Valerie sighed. “Already did, thankfully I came up clean.”

“That’s good at least!” Harley assured. “Having to deal with STDs because your husband cheated sounds like a slap to the face.”

“Especially if you ever wanna have sex again.” Iris tapped her fingers on the table. “Speaking of, when do you think you’ll end up back in the scene…?”

Harley elbowed Iris. “Not the time!” she whispered.

“No, no, I don’t mind,” Valerie replied. “It’s been four months, which isn’t a lot, but I don’t think I truly loved Roy for a very long time in hindsight. I really should have bit the bullet and seeked out divorce, maybe he wouldn’t have needed to cheat.” She scoffed at the last part before continuing. “Plus…” She looked down nervously. “There is this guy I’ve been talking to.”

Harley and Iris leaned closer. “There is!?” they both questioned.

Valerie nodded. “I met him shortly after Roy… disappeared. He helped me get back on my feet after everything.”

Iris put her elbows on the table, her chin resting on her hands. “That sounds really nice!”

“Yeah, but…” Harley responded hesitantly, “so soon?”

“Trust me, I didn’t have a single plan to get back into dating yet, not for a few months or even years. Roy was the worst and I want to be careful, but…” Valerie’s lips curled into a hopeful smile. “He just seems so lovely! Even if a relationship never happens, I really enjoy his company, you know?” She fiddled with her fingers. “He’s such an angel, I wish you could meet him.”

“We could!” Iris exclaimed.

“It’d be nice to scope him out,” Harley added. “Friends’ seal of approval, you know?”

“Yeah, it’d be wonderful…” Valerie sighed. “But I’m worried I’d be coming on too fast if I invited him to a date with us, you know? Both for his sake and mine, I don’t want to scare the poor guy away. Hey, my husband of multiple years went away only four months ago, but do you want to go on a date and be evaluated by my friends? Seems too forward.”

“It can just be a friend thing!” Harley piped up. “You know, assimilating him into your other circles.”

“True!” Iris confirmed. “We do that all the time, especially you, Val. That’s how Harley and I met, remember?”

Valerie giggled. “Yeah, I remember that day. You two immediately clicked.” She let out a deep breath. “Okay, I’ll call him tonight and ask him to—”

A knock was heard at the door. The three women jerked their heads to face the front door. “Postman at this hour?” Harley asked.

“It’s Sunday,” Valerie replied. “Postman doesn’t come by that day.” She could feel her palms grow sweaty.

The knock was heard again, but this time a voice joined it. “Valerie, dear? It’s me, Gabriel. Are you alright?”

Valerie’s anxiety was washed over with confusion. She walked to the door, swinging it open to reveal a tall, blond man with blue eyes. He looked like her Gabriel, except he had no wings, and instead of donning white robes he donned a blue long-sleeve dress shirt and black jeans. He also seemed to have more saturation to him; was her Gabriel always that grey?

“Ah, my darling Valerie!” Gabriel exclaimed. “I was getting worried about you, my dear. I hadn’t heard from you in quite some time.”

Valerie raised an eyebrow. ‘Just go with it,’ a voice in her head spoke out; she decided to obey it. “Oh, Gabriel! What a surprise, I’m sorry I worried you.”

“As long as you’re okay, that’s all I needed to know,” Gabriel smiled. “You call me every night to chat, I was starting to get a little lonely these past few days without hearing your lovely voice.” He held out a small bouquet of red and purple tulips, which Valerie shyly took with a quiet ‘thank you’ under her breath. Gabriel simply smiled in response, softly planting a kiss on Valerie’s forehead. He then glanced over at the two women in the kitchen gawking at the scene, and widened the gap between him and his friend. “Oh, pardon me, dear,” Gabriel apologized. “I didn’t mean to interrupt anything.”

Valerie rubbed the side of her arm anxiously. “Oh, don’t worry about that!” she assured. “Nobody minds, right girls?” She turned hopefully to her friends.

Iris and Harley looked at each other and then back at their friend. “Uh… nope!” Harley replied, Iris nodding alongside.

Valerie smiled, using her free hand to grab a hold of Gabriel’s. “How about you come in for a minute? I should get a good vase for these.”

“Of course, I was hoping I could also say hello to our little friend as well.” Muffled barking could be heard from Valerie’s room; Gabriel’s smile grew wider at the sound. “That must be her!”

“Is that a dog?” Harley asked, interest piqued.

Iris looked where the noise came from. “Ohhh, can I see it? I love puppies!”

Valerie giggled. “Sure, sure. Gabriel, would you mind…?”

“Not at all, dear,” he said before departing to Valerie’s room. While Gabriel was busy, Valerie grabbed a vase full of decorative faux-flowers off of a living room side-table and emptied it before filling it with water from the kitchen sink. She carefully placed the tulips into the vase and placed them where the vase once resided.

Iris and Harley approached the flowers in awe. “Awww, red tulips?” Iris cooed. “Maybe your little guy friend might like you back after all—”

Valerie held a finger up to her lips.

“Whoops, sorry,” Iris whispered.

“The red is sweet and all,” Harley asked in a hush, “but the purple? Either he thinks you’re a queen, or it’s—”

“Rebirth,” Gabriel butted in, holding a small dog in hand. “The purple is for rebirth, to symbolize this new phase in her life.” The small dog in his grasp — a chihuahua — wagged its tail at the sight of Valerie and her friends; it let out excited yips.

“A chihuahua, Val?” Iris asked, “I thought you were terrified of those things.”

“Oh, totally,” Valerie explained, “but Gabriel said getting over small fears might help me get over bigger fears. At the very least, the little baby’s been growing on me.” She took the chihuahua from Gabriel. “Sooo, this is Lola!”

Harley and Iris took turns gawking at Lola and petting her carefully. Lola responded very excitedly to the new company, to Valerie’s relief. The three of them sat down on the living room couch, Iris and Harley on either side of Valerie, letting the chihuahua scamper between their three laps.

Gabriel stood next to the couch beside Iris, gazing at his companion Valerie. “If it would be of any help,” he offered, “how about I take dearest Lola for a walk? Since you seem preoccupied with your guests, after all.”

“That would be sweet of you,” Valerie agreed, holding the dog out for Gabriel. “Thank you.”

“It’s my pleasure,” he smiled, picking up Lola and taking her to Valerie’s room; a moment later, he emerged with Lola, who was now wearing a harness with a leash on it. “

---

it ended there, but basically valerie's friends were going to end up at the end of the day a little sus about gabriel's true origin but also not vocalizing this to valerie because how are you gonna say "hey honey i think your new man is secretly an evil creature" to your friend who just found love again LMFAO

[boraxquinn]

For all three 💔 = Has your muse ever been heartbroken? If so, explain what happened. 

☆ Headcanon Prompts ☆      

   Love and Romance

💔 = Has your muse ever been heartbroken? If so, explain what happened. 

Tsuki: Yes I um- I met one of biases and I literally had hearts in my eyes. But turns out he was a real jerk. He kept laughing at me, making fun of me, he made faces if we even touched. Even said no one would ever love me or date me. I went home in tears. I was so embarrassed. So and excuse my French, fuck that guy and his group!

Irene: Actually I can very happily say I've never had my heart broken. My first love ended up being my last. And we have been happily married for 3 years now. I wouldn't trade him for the world. I love you Ryker~ @frekiheimr

*just a warning the next story maybe triggering to some.*

Bora: Oh yes. Many times. The worst one though was probably my last marriage. I had just got out of a abusive relationship at the time. My boyfriend liked pushing me down stairs, and tying my arms to the bed and leaving me there for hours sometimes days without water or food. He was also sleeping with 4 other woman. And if I told anyone about what was happening, he was going to "bring my nightmares to life." So I finally got away from him after a year. That when I met Tatsuya. He was sooo handsome and treated me like a queen. We had a beautiful year together before we got married. That all changed the second I put that wedding ring on my finger. I was pregnant with my first child and he just disappeared. No honeymoon. Gone. He would be gone for weeks, no one could reach him but then I would see him at events. But if he saw me with a man, he would come home and just be sooo angry with me. It got so bad that my friends had to start helping me with my pregnancy since he never came home. Jongie helped me raise my unborn child the most. That made him jealous too. Then we lost him and that broke my heart. I couldn't cope. I started drinking everyday. Even after the baby was born. My best friend was gone and my husband was still not coming home. I threated divorce about three times. He even got me to move to Japan telling me that would fix everything. And it didn't I was away from my home and my safety group. Still no change. I was always alone with our baby in a place I didn't know. So I had enough and said for a third time I wanted a divorce. He got so mad that he locked me in our home, sent his buddies to watch me 24/7 so I wouldn't run away. And then his big plan was to force me on my birthday to renew our vows. With only one of his friends as a witness. ON MY BIRTHDAY!! I cried for a month everyday until my birthday cause I was so scared. The only way I got away was a few of my friends got together, came to the airport and got me out of the country and back to Korea. I never wanted the marriage to end. I loved him. But the man I met, and the man I married were two totally different people. He became a monster. Even now, I love him, I think about him and I forgive him for everything. Cause I can't live with bitterness my whole life.

[bluesylveon2]

It's Beginning to Look Like a Love Story

This is for @levihan-drabbles prompt, Warmth. I hope you all enjoy!

Disclaimer: Attack on Titan is a manga/anime series written by Hajime Isayama and published by Kondasha

----

If Hange Zoe was known for anything, it was her great ideas.

"Hange, this is the worst idea I've ever heard in my entire life," Nanaba said as she opened the door to Paradis Coffee. This coffee was not huge like Starbucks or Tim Hortons (aka the places the girls like to go), but they were willing to try a local shop after Nifa would not stop raving about it. It was also a perfect time to grab a warm drink, especially with the holidays coming up.

"Ha!" Hange replied and looked at her friend in shock. "This plan is foul-proof, Nana. I'm telling you that this will work!"

"Mhm." Nanaba nodded, clearly unimpressed.

The shop was empty except for the girls and the muscular blonde barista. The girls greeted the barista and eyed the many baked goods on display.

"What makes you think that sitting in a coffee shop for hours will help you snatch a husband by Christmas? Do you even have proof that works?" Nanaba asked skeptically without turning to face Hange. Instead, she was eying the selection of breakfast sandwiches available.

"Duh. I know it works because it worked for someone else! Besides, I won't just be sitting. I will be working on my laptop or reading." Hange smiled while staring at the chocolate croissant on display.

"Uh-huh, so did this person sit in a coffee shop for hours then?"

"Noooo…" Hange dragged on with uncertainty. It piped Nanaba's interest, and she turned to her.

"Well, the girl I heard the story from actually worked in the coffee shop when she met her husband BUT!" Hange added the moment she noticed that Nanaba was going to say something. "That does not mean I could meet my future husband in one too!"

Nanaba recited her order and paid the total. "Mhm, but there's a chance this plan won't work, Hans. It may have worked for one person, but that does not mean it works for the next." Nanaba said with worry in her voice just as the barista handed her her change.

"Maybe it could work for you, though, Nanaba."

"I'll pass." Nanaba quickly shut the idea down before finding an empty table to sit in.

"C'mon, Nanaba! You're hot, single, and intelligent! I bet you would get wifed up in no time!" Hange yelled out loud. Nanaba blushed out of embarrassment, and the barista chuckled to himself.

"Did you have to say that out loud?!" Nanaba whispered yelled.

Hange shrugged her shoulders. "We're the only ones here besides the barista."

Right on cue, The barista called out Nanaba's name, prompting her to stand up and grab their order. Hange did not miss the way he was checking her friend out. She decided to save that for a later day.

"Hange, your plan is crazy, but I will say it would be a miracle if it actually worked."

"Maybe," Hange replied and took a sip of her drink. "How hard can it be?"

And so, Hange waited….

And waited…

And waited…

She waited for Mr. Right to show up, but none of them gave her a warm feeling in her chest. One guy looked really handsome until he opened his foul mouth. Another guy was taciturn for Hange's taste. The last guy was just a walking red flag.

Hange huffed in disappointment. She was beginning to lose hope, and there were only 6 days until Christmas.

Suddenly, a coffee cup and a plate full of pastries entered her peripheral view, and Hange looked up from her book to stare at the newcomer. She was too stunned to speak, but she recognized the stranger. He was also a barista who worked at the coffee shop. Hange would see him work from time to time, and he typically had an indifferent look to him. Now he looked shy, and Hange noticed the red tint in his ears. She thought it made him look adorable.

"It's on the house since you have been here for a while."

"Ahh, thank you-" Hange glanced at the barista's nametag. "Levi," she replied and grabbed the drink first. Since lunchtime, she had been here, and she had not eaten or drunk anything since. Hange took a sip, and the familiar spice of the chai latte filled her tastebuds.

Ah, so Levi is pretty observant. Hange thought as she sipped her go-to drink.

"Is this seat empty? I wanted to sit with you since business is slow today."

Hange smiled. "Go ahead." she gestured to the seat, and Levi sat down.

There was a moment of awkward silence except for the Christmas music playing in the background.

"So what brings you to this coffee shop every day? I know it's not for the shitty espressos."

Hange snorted. "You would not believe me if I told you my reason."

Levi stared at her as if he was challenging her. "Enlighten me. I have heard the worst stories, and I have a lot of time to spare. The cafe is practically dead around this time."

"Okay. Let me start from the beginning…."

---

"Wait, so you scammed your uncle into getting two gifts for Christmas instead of one because of your birthday?" Hange laughed and wiped the tears from her eyes. The two have talked for hours since Hange retold her story (A/N: Levi was not impressed). However, something clicked between the two that their conversations flowed so quickly, and there was never a dull moment.

Levi took a sip of his tea (he had made it an hour into their talk) and chuckled. "It worked for a few years until Kenny finally caught on. He realized that one gift that celebrated two holidays was enough."

"I'm sorry. That story really made my day." Hange continued laughing, which caused Levi to crack a smile. He briefly glanced at his watch and noticed the time.

"Hey, Hange. It's getting late, and I'm sure you have to be up early for work tomorrow."

"Shit! You're right! I'm so sorry, Levi!" Hange began to pack up her things.

Levi waved a hand in dismissal. "It's alright. I need to go close up the store anyway. How about we continue this tomorrow? Same time and place."

Hange stopped what she was doing and stared at Levi. She felt a warm feeling begin to form in her chest. "Hang out? Like a date?"

Levi shrugged. "If you want to call it that. I don't mind it."

"Sure!" She replied, already heading out the door. "I'll see you tomorrow, Levi."

Levi smiled. "See you tomorrow."

The warm feeling never left Hange's chest. It only grew instead.

---

©: This is where I insert all rights reserved stuff. This story belongs to me. Do not modify or republish. Hanami is my OC and belongs to me.

A/N: @mello-jello remember that coffee shop au I mentioned ages ago? I did it lol.

[thesolferino]

⤷ note: apologies for losing your request, anon, but thank you for requesting! this is my first time writing a full fic in second person, so bear with me, and i hope this is what you were looking for <3

The Great American Bake Off

pairing: corpse husband x gn!reader

word count: 3.6k

genre: fluff

summary: you’ve been jealous of rae and her closeness with your boyfriend since the dawn of time, but things change and friendships are made once she comes over for one hell of a cooking video.

Corpse, among many other things, was a man many wished to have.

It’s the truth; even if he didn’t have a YouTube channel through which millions kept up with everything from horror stories to Among Us gameplays, people would still turn heads and whisper whenever he spoke - that attention more than multiplied when he started blowing up and his social media presence grew.

With growth come numbers, and there are always people behind said numbers. Through them, Corpse makes wonderful friends - through them, you had met him, too. All the way back, during his horror narration days, you had grown to like him - really, who wouldn’t?

A DM you once sent after a few drinks, when you claimed to your friends you’d get the “deep-voiced man of your dreams” you often talked about and they, in turn, challenged you to message him, was nothing short of a joke and the idea of him responding was merely a pipe dream. What you hadn’t expected, however, was a response, which wrecked your brain at noon the next day, where your head throbbed with embarrassment, guilt, pride, happiness, a melt of hatred and gratefulness for your friends, panic and the remains of alcohol that tugged at every part of your skull.

It had turned out to be more than a great idea, though, because for the next few weeks you were constantly talking. You learned so much more than he let on in videos, and during late night calls you found out everything from his favorite clothing brand to his favorite color to his thoughts about his own mortality and then back to his favorite cereal. Audio calls and short voice messages turned into hours long FaceTimes that led you from friends to something more. And after a year or so of dating, you packed your bags and made it to sunny San Diego, ready to lay in his arms and sweat bullets.

Safe to say Corpse’s social media presence had its good sides. However, with all good things come bad things too, and you weren’t sure if the bad things were bad at all or you were simply too jealous.

Corpse made wonderful friends thanks to his YouTube channel. He met people he could confide in, meet, people he could talk to about his worst problems, people who would listen - he met people he could have fun with, with who he could forget all about the real world and his own issues, and simply laugh his heart away, play games until the late hours of the night.

If he had to name his closest ones, they would have to be Dave, Loey, maybe Mykie, possibly Jack, and Rae. And that is exactly where the root of the problem stood.

Rae is beautiful, and everyone who denies it must be either dumb or blind. She’s drop dead gorgeous, and funny, and kind, and smart, in a way that made you want to rip your hair out. You wanted to hate her so bad, because the jealousy ate away at you like a damn disease, but you couldn’t, because she was perfect Rae, and as much as you hated the fact she seemed to be perfect inside out, you just couldn’t hate her as her. It was impossible, you concluded.

You convinced yourself you weren’t jealous every time you heard him yelling or laughing at her from his office room - or at least you attempted to do so. Your lunch would turn sour and end up forgotten because you’d be way too focused on listening in on what he was doing and trying to make out what she was saying to even eat at the same pace you previously were. Jealousy ate away at you, no matter if you admitted it to yourself or not.

It didn’t go unnoticed by Corpse, of course. On one late night when you couldn’t sleep and neither could he, as per usual, you turned on a random comedy that you half-heartedly paid attention to, his fingers combing through the knots in your hair peacefully and the slow pace of the movie lulling you to sleep slowly. That is, before his phone rang and lit the mostly dark room. You managed to sneak a glance at the notification before he had, and the familiar bitterness seeped between your ribs as always upon seeing the name displayed at the top of the message, more than awake now.

You visibly stiffened when he laughed at the message and typed something back, shifting your head in his lap as some subconscious attempt at getting him to pay attention to you instead. He put his phone down and you huffed, eyes locked on the TV screen as you pretended to be extremely absorbed in the movie even though you weren’t quite sure of the difference between the protagonist and antagonist anymore. His hands didn’t return to your hair, and that somehow made you even more annoyed.

“What’s up?” Corpse quietly spoke up, barely over the volume over the already quiet movie.

“Nothing.” You said, quicker than you wanted to, and you bit your tongue in cringe when you realised it was an awful lie. Corpse seemed to think the same.

“That’s bullshit. Seriously, what’s wrong?” He asked, and was met with pure silence. In reality, you were hoping he’d simply never realise you were somewhat jealous, because you knew you were being stupid and unreasonable, but you couldn’t help wanting him all to yourself. Admitting it out loud made it so much more real, and so much more embarrassing that you would rather bury yourself alive than admit to being jealous of Rae, of all people.

After a few seconds of silence, save the laughter of characters on screen, he spoke again.

“Are you jealous?” The hint of a teasing tone in his voice made you want to rip your hair out of your skull. Was it really that damn hard to believe that yes, you were jealous of an extremely close friend of his? Was it a crime?

The clenching of your jaw seemed to give Corpse enough of a response, and his hands returned to running themselves through your hair as he giggled to himself. 

“What’s so damn funny?” You borderline spat, causing his movements to halt for a second before continuing with even louder laughter.

“I don’t know, just the idea of you being jealous of Rae is so funny. I’ve noticed the way you roll your eyes whenever I text her in front of you. You’re not exactly sneaky, you know?” His words made blood rush straight to your face, cheeks heating up in embarrassment. How long has he known this for?

“Sorry. I don’t…” you exhaled and attempted to smile. “I don’t know what’s up with me. I’m so jealous nowadays. I don’t even know why.”

“There’s enough of me to share with everyone, no worries baby.” he replied, teasing tone still yet to dissipate as you slap his knee in mock offense and he starts wheezing.

“Absolutely not! Fucking excuse you, I’m not sharing with anyone!” you gaped at him as he kept laughing.

That was the end of it - or at least Corpse thought so. Needless to say, he was wrong.

Your mood would instantly turn sour whenever he’d laugh at one of her messages, and you attempted to push down every eye roll whenever he’d sit on his phone, between your legs, back turned to you so you could see everything, and open Rae’s DMs again. Sometimes you managed, sometimes you couldn’t help it, but you did your best to do it whenever he wasn’t looking. Because you truly knew you were being unreasonable, especially whenever you have to relay situations like how he had to postpone a date one time because Rae asked him to play Rust for a bit longer and you almost ripped all your hair out of your skull in frustration back to your best friend who just turned Rae and Corpse into the villains in the situation because that’s what best friends are supposed to do.

Not like he was going out of his way to talk to her a concerning amount, they mostly talked in groupchats and on streams and that was only a few times weekly, but it did absolutely nothing to calm the green monster growing stronger in you every day, fed by every laugh she got out of him.

The green monster fucking loved it when Corpse excitedly announced to you that he’s finally meeting his friends for the first time, and by friends meaning Rae, Sykkuno and Karl. You, however… were far from impressed.

He paced around the room in excitement, a mix of obvious anxiety and joy evident on his face, and he fiddled with the strings of his hoodie with shaky hands as he very proudly announced that he would be the second tallest person in the room through a blinding, pearly grin, and seeing him so electrified couldn’t help but make you shut your jealous thoughts up, even if just for a little bit, and mirror his grin back to him.

What did, however, make you as anxious as him was when he announced they’d a) be coming to your shared apartment and b) making a cooking video - it sent you into a panicked mom mode as you dusted every corner of every room and vacuumed everything from the kitchen to the balcony and Corpse did nothing but record you as you anxiously rambled and laugh at you from his place on your bed.

When the dreaded Saturday finally came, and the first person to arrive, Sykkuno, rang your doorbell, you squeezed Corpse’s hand to stop him from nervously toying with his rings and opened the door, and you greeted the man like he was your own brother and not a person you’d seen probably a total of three times through the computer screen and someone who’s seen you maybe two times, from the pictures Corpse sent him, in your best attempt to make both of them more comfortable. It actually kind of worked - turns out Sykkuno is a pretty affectionate guy, too, and a conversation started as soon as he stepped in. Corpse gave you a look when you pulled away from Sykkuno’s half-hug, and you almost laughed out loud at the irony when his phone lit up with a notification from Rae announcing she was almost there at that exact moment.

She had kept true to her word; ten minutes or so later, another ring was heard and you gestured to Corpse to open it this time as you gave Sykkuno his cup of water and resisted any and every urge to roll your eyes or do something otherwise bitchy and stupid. Corpse did as told, and you watched them hug and listened to Rae squeal in excitement through the open door of the living room and decided to plaster a smile on your face for as long as you could muster before you remove yourself from the situation when they start filming.

Unfortunately for you, the first person she locked eyes with was exactly you, and they lit up an even prettier brown (if that was even possible) as she beelined to you and you barely got a greeting out before she engulfed you in a large hug, arms wrapping around your neck as she swayed both of you side to side.

“Oh my God, you must be Y/N! I’ve heard so much about you, it’s so nice to finally meet you!” Rae cheered into your ear before she finally pulled back, before shooting an infectious grin at you that you couldn’t help but return back.

“All good things, I hope.” you chuckled as she moved to greeting Sykkuno, and nodded her head with an enthusiastic giggle of her own. You eyed Corpse for a second who simply leaned against the door frame, watching the whole thing unfold with somewhat of a proud smile on his face, before Rae turned back to you and your attention was on her again.

“Of course! Corpse is very much a simp for you, you know that?” She said and both you and Corpse laughed, especially him, who nodded his head in agreement as she sat back down, still beaming at you.

“Well, I’m happy to hear that.” you respond before turning back to Corpse. “Where’s Karl at?”

“He’ll be here in half an hour or so, he only landed recently.” he said. You nodded and moved to sit on a nearby chair to leave space for the guests on the couch.

Karl ended up arriving in twenty minutes and apprised everyone of the information that “his taxi driver is a psycho that, apparently, doesn’t fear stop signs or the police” before setting up the camera in your kitchen and tried his best to attach lapel mics on everybody (admittedly, it took way longer than it should’ve, but he eventually managed and that counted as a win in his book). You reluctantly agreed to be the judge of the finished product when they’re done cooking, and Karl was there for the purposes of being a cameraman and making jokes off screen so he agreed too, albeit way more enthusiastically than you.

The two of you sat behind the camera as the three of them lined up, Corpse wearing a mask and his signature eyepatch (that he didn’t really need, but those two did their job in preserving his privacy) and introduced what they were doing. Corpse was obviously very anxious, hands fidgeting constantly and shivering like a dog after a bath despite the hoodie he was wearing in 100 degree weather because of the shower of sweat that was now drying on his body, and that was partly why you were there, supportive smiles, encouraging cheers and all.

They were making Mexican ground beef tacos, and despite knowing Corpse can barely make a sandwich without setting at least two dishes on fire, you still cheered him on proudly and repeated he was part Mexican himself roughly 5 times a minute, claiming he was going to kill it.

“Kill it? More like kill one of us- CORPSE watch what you’re doing with that fucking knife! You’re proving my point!” Rae yelled at him as he giggled in delight, watching the woman gape at him in pure horror and Sykkuno watch his movements completely entranced as he played with the knife in his hands.

“You’re just mad that he’s going to make tacos fifty times better than you.” you said to Rae, chewing down on some M&Ms that Karl and you shared (both of you decided on a genius plan - you’re going to eat the whole bag before they’re done with cooking so you can claim you’re full and therefore can’t eat the atrocity that will most likely be the tacos).

“Don’t gas me up like that, Y/N, you are well aware I’m shit at cooking. Expect absolutely nothing from me.” he replied over the sizzling of the meat on the pan, throwing a whole spoonful of chili powder into it, earning loud yelling and scolding from your side and loud laughter from Rae.

“HALF A TEASPOON! Half a teaspoon, how have you not remembered this already?! We’ve made tacos a million times now, oh my God, you’re actually stupid.” you yelled at him, arms flailing in the direction of the seasoning to emphasise your ‘half a teaspoon’ point as Rae doubled over in laughter and Sykkuno looked into the pan with a concerned and somewhat afraid look. Just as he peeked in, the overwhelming smell of chili powder started biting away at his eyes, and he jumped away with a yelp.

“Jesus, Corpse!” he exclaimed, rubbing his eyes with his forearm as the whole room burst into laughter and Corpse suspiciously inspected his beef.

“What were you saying about your ‘Mexican king’, Y/N?” Rae asked, pulling out a few tortillas and putting them on the table. You huffed, grabbing another handful of M&Ms.

“Giving him up to God. He’s the only one who can help, at this point.” you said. She giggled in response and Corpse let out some sort of protesting sound and waved his knife around in complaint. “I don’t know who this man is. He broke into my kitchen and now I’m here.”

“Hey, I pay half of your rent!” he said, and you were about to reply but Rae dropped her meat into a pan full of overheated oil, and a loud hiss and some sort of a scream overtook the room as a cloud of steam shot into the air and she frantically looked around for the wooden spoon so the meat wouldn’t stick to the pan. You simply sat and laughed, eating the candy like it was popcorn and you were watching a shitty cooking show - it wasn’t that far from reality, really.

“Um, I just realised I don’t make many tacos, actually.” she said as she helplessly stirred the meat, turning to you with pleading eyes. “What seasoning even goes into this? Y/N, will you help me? Let’s team up against Corpse!”

You tilted your head in thought, but before you could even speak, Corpse spoke up.

“That’s not fucking fair, that’s-that’s against the rules.” he turned to you. “You won’t betray me, right?”

You laughed at him, adjusting in your seat. “I gave up on you ever since you added, like, 3 kilos of seasoning into the meat for no reason.” then you turned to Rae. “Sure, let’s do it, babe.”

Their loud yelling immediately started mixing, Rae’s cheers contrasting Corpse’s protesting. She stuck her tongue out at him meanwhile Corpse shot her the middle finger, and she turned back to you with a grin.

“Alright, what do I put in?”

Roughly twenty unnecessary and extremely long minutes later, the tacos were done, two each for each of them. Rae’s looked the best - probably because you guided her through the whole thing - next to Sykkuno’s, whose you were genuinely intrigued to try. While Corpse was arguing with Rae, he burned roughly half of his already ruined beef, and Karl made the very nice observation that it looked like a bird shat in a tortilla, which you proclaimed as the highlight of the video.

Since you and Karl claimed you were full, the three of them simply swapped tacos between each other as to be unbiased, and the two of you watched in amused suspense. You were actually quite interested to see what the end results were - you were first anxious and quite annoyed you even had to participate in the first place, because it meant losing your mind from jealousy, watching Corpse and Rae giggle and act all domestic while cooking, but jealousy simply dissipated somewhere half through the video as you watched the three argue if cheddar cheese belonged on tacos or not and Rae laugh at every stupid joke you cracked. Now, you sat, fully immersed as you stared at Sykkuno’s face; the poor guy ended up with the misfortune of having to try Corpse’s taco first.

“Zoom in, zoom in!” you whispered into Karl’s ear who complied and zoomed into Sykkuno’s face. He bit into the taco, chewing for a second before his face twisted in disgust and you began wheezing when he grabbed a tissue and spit it out, immediately grabbing his glass of water. Rae laughed at him as well, mouth full of his one, which she claimed she actually liked but it wasn’t as good as the “Y/NRae-co” as she proudly called it. Corpse silently ate Rae’s taco and refused to give a review on it because he was upset he got defeated, but the fact that he scarfed down the whole thing in a minute or so was enough of a review.

“Oh, come on, it can’t be that bad.” Corpse exclaimed when he saw Sykkuno’s bite in the tissue, grabbing the second taco he made and biting down on it. The whole room burst into laughter when he roughly swallowed, tears obvious in the one eye that showed, because of the overly spicy beef.

“What are you motherfuckers laughing at? It’s not that bad, I stand by tacorpse.”

“Tacorpse is actually genius. The one good thing you came up with during the entirety of this video.” Rae said and Corpse mumbled a fuck you in response.

“Well, I think we can all agree that me and Y/N’s taco was clearly the best.” she said, clasping her hands together.

“I actually think mine was better.” Sykkuno said, to which she pushed his plate out of the frame.

“Nobody asked you anything.”

“Don’t bully Sykkuno, I’ll fucking kick you out.”

“Oh yeah? I’m pretty sure Y/N would kick you out before they’d let you kick me!” Rae said, accusingly pointing her taco in Corpse’s direction.

“Alright, let’s wrap up the video.” Karl laughed behind the camera, and the three of them all turned to properly face it and end the video.

“Thank you all so much for watching, this has been an… interesting video, to say the least. Uh, thank you to Karl for filming this whole disaster, thank you to Corpse,” Rae gestured in his direction, “for lending us his kitchen, thank you to Sykkuno for probably getting us more views on this video, and also a big thank you to Y/N, Corpse’s better half for making this video way more interesting and helping me make probably, like, the best taco I’ve ever made.” she grinned and you shoved a peace sign in front of the camera.

“If you liked this video, check out Sykkuno and Corpse’s channels, they will be linked down below, and please click like and subscribe to support the channel! Again, thank you all for watching, see you later, bye!” she finished, and with that, Karl turned the camera off.

Silence engulfed the room. You sighed.

“Alright, who’s gonna clean this shit up?”

[anika-ann]

My Timid Hello, My Clumsy Goodbye (S.R.)

Type: one-shot, canon semi-compliant?

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Barton!reader    Word count: 8900 (...sorry)

Summary: You’re spending the evening and the night before your wedding with the two most important men of your life.

When the sun rises again, you’ll say your ‘I do’ in a close circle of friends and family. It’s not a goodbye to your old life and it’s not a hello to some enormous change; but you will no longer be a Barton. You will be a Rogers. Why not reminisce a bit? 

Warnings: mention of an abandoned baby, blood and injuries, alcohol, implied possibly rougher sex (nothing graphic) ...mature?, language, so much sappiness... let me know if I missed any

A/N: For what-is-your-backupplan-today 10th anniversary of CA:TFA challenge. Prompts in bold. Thank you for coming up with this wonderful theme and hosting this challenge! Long live CA:TFA!

A/N: Throughout the fic, you’ll find snippets of lyrics from SYML’s "Everything All At Once”. Honestly, the song has a completely different meaning to me, but tearing it out of context works for this story just fine :) When you’re done reading, I recommend the music video. It friggin’ broke me in the worst and best ways. Enjoy!

This is my hello This is my clumsy goodbye I'm putting my glass down I wanna remember tonight

Tony rented an island for you. Clint nearly passed out learning about it and grumbled for days about having a hard time to top that, which, no arguing, was understandable.

It was an incredibly extravagant thing to do, throwing around money that could have been used for a much more honourable cause, but you couldn’t complain. One should not look a gifted horse into mouth – and so you didn’t.

Because Tony Stark renting an island was his premature wedding gift. The fact that your brother bitched about not being able to top that, well, that was his problem. You were certain that deep down, he knew you didn’t need any fancy gifts like that.

Then again, Tony’s gift might have been epically overpriced, but not exactly unthoughtful; along with a private island came a private jet and you being literally flied under radar so no single paparazzi knew where you and America’s golden boy Steve Rogers would seal the deal with your ‘I do.’ So, you were everything but ungrateful to your friend that he succeeded at pulling off such covert operation; and frankly, this place was nothing short of wonderful.

The golden sand was pleasantly warm under your toes as you as you and Clint walked towards the two single beach chairs facing the ocean. Wearing bikini under the baggy t-shirt and a pair of shorts, sunglasses on top of your head, because why would you deprive yourself the gorgeous view of the sun beginning to set down, you followed your brother – not in blood but in every other sense – to the seats, allured by the view, the serenity and the cold sixpack in his hand.

You had already had a traditional bachelorette party with your girls – with the team, with your family. Natasha, Wanda, Pepper, Sharon and Maria. The night had been the perfect blend of what was considered typically feminine, dress up, fanciness and wine and gossip, and a fun night out with shots, dancing, karaoke and pool. That particular night sadly was interrupted shortly by an annoying photographer, but he soon understood it was not very clever to annoy three and a half Avengers or the CEO of Stark Industries for that matter.

Clint however… Clint deserved a special evening with you. With the rest of the team in various state of chilling out, scattered around the luxurious small houses and gorgeous beaches, you two were left the privacy such moment required.

Even if the special moment consisted of simple talking and drinking beer while watching the sun set, a symbolic end of one phase of your life – a phase that was undeniably tied to the famous and yet barely known archer, one of the seven defenders who rushed into the Battle of New York to save the Earth.

One of the seven had been your brother, having previously been controlled by the monster who brought an army from outer space; there was no questioning whether you would join the fight or not, no matter how you preferred the latter part of your field medic job title to the former.

Another of these brave people, as it turned out, was your future husband. A man you had met for the first time that day, but whom you didn’t hesitate to push back down when he got hit by a freaking alien weapon and stood up, wanting to shake it off as if it was nothing. Your medical training told you not to let him; and your stubbornness had been just a touch stronger than his that day.

Apparently, Steve found you always standing your ground to be one of your most endearing qualities.

What a fancy way to express it instead of simply calling you a stubborn pain in his ass.

“You’re lost in your head, Twinkie,” Clint hummed, playfully nudging your ribs with an elbow, bringing you back to the present.

Your nose automatically scrunched at the childhood nickname.

“You gotta stop calling me that, Bobo,” you retorted, a grin spreading on your face as it was his turn to grimace.

You knew it was nothing but an act and that he in fact loved that nickname, because it held so much sentiment, so many memories… as did his endearment for you.

Bobo had been your first word or so Clint always claimed. Obviously, you wouldn’t remember.

You wouldn’t remember your parents, having been only two days old when your mother left you with a damn circus which was in your hometown at the time. You couldn’t recall how you wouldn’t stop crying until you heard a seven-year-old Clint humming a lullaby for you, with silly replacements of lyrics that always made you laugh later on when you could understand them.

How he started calling you Twinkie, because he was a sugar addict and apparently, you were sweet and small and he liked you; so much that he soon appointed himself to be your brother, your bro, your Bobo.

Once you were older and learned that your involuntary nickname for him also meant ‘crazy’ in Spanish, you were sold to that Bobo endearment forever.

Including the night before your wedding.

“You keep zoning out on me, Kid. Getting cold feet?” Clint hummed, casually handing you a can of beer, opening it up for you.

You automatically reached out and took a sip, eyes fixed on the warm colour on the horizon. What a ridiculous question… but kind and caring, with a hidden promise of getting you out of here if you just asked. Your amazing, protective, crazy brother.

You couldn’t but smile widely, glancing at him from the corner of your eye.

“You offering to kidnap the bride, Clint? I’d like to see you try. You were always better at trapeze than at being an escape artist.”

Clint scoffed. “Please. These are amateurs. I bet I could pull it off.”  

That drew a laugh from you.

“Are you calling the Avengers amateurs? Better yet, are you calling your wife an amateur?” you teased him, watching his face lose colour when he realized that he did exactly that. You leaned over and patted his thigh. “Don’t worry, Bobo. I won’t tell Nat.”

Clint visibly relaxed, but a shadow of worry twisting his expression.

“Seriously though. Where’s your head at, Kid?”

You just shrugged, smile resting on your lips as you wondered if you ever felt so relaxed. It went along well with the reminiscing of the past and despite the fact that tomorrow was a big day and you should probably be nervous, you weren’t. Not in the slightest, more like the opposite. You were giddy even; it dawned to you that nothing in your life had ever felt so right.

No moment in your life offered you such serenity to your heart, your shoulders free of any weight, body light as air.

“Just taking a trip down the memory lane. Thinking about how lucky I was to be dropped at your circus of all circuses of the world,” you grinned at Clint, your tone remaining completely serious.

Because you were being serious – words couldn’t express how grateful for everything that led to this moment you were. How grateful you were to your brother for watching over you, making sure you would always see the light of a new day, guiding you when you found yourself in a dark.

Clint didn’t react beside his fingers twitching and you knew he was giving you the chance to say what you needed to say.

“About how you taught me pretty much everything I know. About how while I might not be the best person in the world, my brother, who is the best brother ever, made me into a decent person and I owe him everything I am. And how I should probably feel guilty for tying myself to another guy who just swept in and whisked away your little sister.”

Clint stared at you, gulping as his eyes gradually filled with tears. You found yourself in a very cheesy moment, bordering on absurd and it was almost too much to handle – but Clint took a deep breath, cleared his throat and swallowed his tears.

“Well, that bastard did steal my greatest life achievement with way too little effort,” he remarked, voice cracking slightly, the image of him causing your eyes to burn as well even if his words made you both tear up and burst out laughing.

“Dammit, Clint, stop making me laugh and cry at the same time…”

“You started it!” he pointed his index finger at you accusingly, taking a large sip of his beer to drown his sentiment. “But for the record, you should not feel guilty. It’s not like you’re leaving me.”

“I know, but-“

“And if you were, you’d be leaving me in good hands.”

“That’s true, Natasha does have a grip on you and might keep you outta trouble-“

“She’s the one who gets me into trouble half of the time!” Clint cried out in protest and you would have argued if it wasn’t the truth.

But before he had met her, Clint was able to make up his own trouble just fine – he was more than half of a reason why while doing a bit of trapeze yourself, you also grew interested in medical care. Because who else than the little sister should treat her big brother’s wounds when he got too crazy?

“In all seriousness, I’m proud of you, Twinkie,” he said sincerely, one corner of his lips raised in a lopsided smile. “You’re entirely entitled to have your own life and if there’s one guy in this whole damn world I’m willing to trust to have you… well, I guess it’s that big blond dumbass.”

“He can be a bit dumb of ass occasionally, can’t he?” you mused lovingly. “I guess it’s right what they say… we do pick our partners similar to our parents, maybe not only in looks. I didn’t really have a dad, I had you, so…”

Clint sighed, smile widening, before it slipped from his face as he caught up on the not-so-hidden insult.

“Hey!”

You couldn’t but laugh at his shocked expression, accidently spilling a splosh of beer on the sand.

“Just… maybe make sure that even married, you still find time to hang out with your big dumb of ass brother every once in a while?” Clint suggested, sounding surprisingly vulnerable.

Your whole demander softened, a little pang of guilt stinging in your heart as he took your words too seriously – and at his worry.

“Clint… I will always find time for my amazing brother.”

“Well, you’re marrying a pretty amazing guy too, so, you know, I understand the dilemma…”

You snorted when he seemed to genuinely fawn over your future husband, shaking your head before downing the rest of your drink.

“As amazing as Steve might be – and gosh, he is, don’t get me started – you still own a pretty big chunk of my heart.”

“Good. You are a Barton at heart,” Clint hummed, pretending that a few tears didn’t roll down his cheeks, leaning towards you as his expression once again grew serious.

Your chest tightened. Oh no. He was gonna say something to make you cry too – as if you already weren’t at verge of crying, emotions bubbling under the surface.

“Clint-“ you warned him silently, but he spoke up anyway and you gulped, bracing yourself.

“Just… whatever happens tomorrow, you must promise me one thing. That you will stay who you are. Not a perfect housewife, but a good woman.”

That was not what you were prepared for, as touching as the sentiment was.

You burst out laughing, head thrown back, hands clutching at your stomach as it actually hurt with the sudden clench. Tears did spring from your eyes, a perfect blend of touched and infinitely amused at your brother’s words.

“Har, har, that’s what I get from trying to speak from heart…” Clint muttered grumpily and you willed yourself to calm your hitching breaths as you looked at him, the pout of his mouth causing you to cackle again.

“Sorry, sorry. It’s just… I am moved, I really am. Thank you. But me? A perfect housewife? And you realize I’m marrying Steve Rogers, right? The epitome of a good man? He would probably threaten to sock me in a jaw if I tried to change into something I’m not just for his sake and actually sock me in my jaw if I turned into a bad woman.”

Clint’s eyebrows jumped, a smirk appearing on his face. “That’s a lot of punching.”  

“My thoughts exactly,” you agreed, reaching for another can, pausing when a thought occurred to you. “Just so we’re clear, I might turn into a bit of a housewife when we have kids, alright? And I want to be a good wife, a good partner to Steve, which is what I’m trying to do even now.”

“I mean, yeah, sure, wouldn’t expect anything less. But… just promise me you’ll stay you and that you’ll keep giving him a run for his money, keep him on his toes a bit,” Clint shrugged with a grin, drawing another chuckle from you.

You saw his point – and you fully intended to keep Steve on his toes. You had a good reason to believe that your future husband enjoyed when you did.

“Oh Clinton… I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

He nodded contentedly, picking up another beer and raising it for a toast, his can clinking with yours.

“Cheers to that!”

A comfortable silence settled between the two of you then, a quiet joy wrapped in one moment; the sun ending its quest, the warm breeze in your hair, the waves whispering of a journey you were about to take off to. And all that with a wordless comforting presence of your family, ready to offer you a shelter if a storm rocked your boat and the wind caused you to lose course.

As your mind wandered, you had to laugh at yourself – it was almost as if you were raised by pirates and not circus performers. Perhaps it was the little bit of free cheeky spirit these life journeys had in common what brought the metaphor to your mind. It was a bit like working with the Avengers too, always on a road, adrenaline in your veins even as you mostly stayed on the jet, ready to assist them… yet here you were pondering that maybe, you were yearning for settling down a bit more.

“Cap wouldn’t punch you anyway, right?” Clint remarked, breaking the silence and you blinked yourself back into reality, taking a moment to figure out what he was talking about.

Oh. Right. Steve punching you if you changed yourself significantly for his benefit.

You smiled softly, heart swelling in affection when the answer to that question appeared obvious.

“No, he wouldn’t.”

“Good. He’d try once and I’d put an arrow straight between his eyes,” Clint promised darkly, almost causing you to choke at the sudden violent note. He quickly fixed it with a ramble, lightening the atmosphere yet again. “Minus training of course. He’s allowed to try in order to improve your hand-to-hand. Not that he would ever land a hand on you anyway. Always so soft on you…” he grinned, seemingly alright with that attitude if not slightly calling the big strong supersoldier out.

Oh you could be cheeky too alright if that was what your brother wanted.

“That you know of.”

A confused huh was the only reaction you got – that and a puzzled look.

“He’s always soft on me,” you repeated Clint’s words, turning to him, lips slowly spreading in a wicked smirk. “That you know of.”

Clint’s brows furrowed for a short moment and then his features twisted in a disgusted grimace, face growing a tint crimson.

“Gross!” he complained, more blood rushing to his cheeks. “You know what, I changed my mind. We’re leaving. You’re not marrying him. I’m kidnapping the bride and never returning her, locking her somewhere far far away-“

You snorted at his indignation, your grin undoubtedly battling the one of the Cheshire cat.

“No will do, Bobo. I’m marrying Steve and you can’t stop me.”

This time, Clint didn’t even protest, eyes misted over, nose still scrunched at the mental image, lamenting as the night slowly settled over the paradise-like island.

“Oh god, please help, I can’t unsee it, can’t unhear it--- ew-”

Your laughter was carried away by the breeze as Clint seemed to be unable to look at you.

You swung your beer around, thinking that yes – nothing quite ever felt so right as being here in this moment. Relaxing with your brother, teasing him relentlessly and counting down hours to when you’d say ‘I do’ to the only man who in your eyes ever battled the mantle of the best man in the universe.

In one unending moment You fall within my reach I'm close enough to whisper Hold on to me Hold on to me

You weren’t sure what time it was when you snuck into the beach house, one of few, which had been wisely chosen to be occupied by you and Steve only. You attempted to be quiet and liked to think you succeeded, in your even barely tipsy state, but your effort turned out to be in vain as you found Steve perched against headboard of your bed; reading a book, thin white t-shirt and sleep shorts on display as the soft sheet had been kicked away, scrunched up by his feet.

He was gorgeous – he was gorgeous and yours, a momentary picture perfect of peace, appearing to feel just as light as you did and somehow the dullness of the moment, just him relaxing in bed with a good read as you came home… it was more alluring than one would think.

Steve looked up from the book when you wavered in the doorway, soft lopsided smile spreading on his face.

God, that smile. It might be over two years since you saw it for the first time, but it could still make you weak in your knees.

And somehow, it was now even more charming now than the day you met, more tender than just before you kissed for the first time, sweeter than when he proposed.

“Hey sweetheart,” he greeted you, appreciative gaze roaming your figure and the little too much skin on display – something you regretted when the warm sunrays had bid you goodbye, raising goosebumps. And Steve, the attentive man he was, noticed, his smile earning a teasing edge. “You look a bit cold in there.”

You resisted the urge to stick your tongue out.

“And you look pretty cosy in there. Thought you’d be either asleep or with Bucky.”

Steve shrugged, not letting go of his unfinished chapter just yet, knowing you had a routine to go through before joining him.

“Maybe I missed you. Maybe Bucky is an old man and needs his sleep.”

You chuckled, not rising to the bait – you knew what would follow if you dared to say Steve was just as old. Not that you would complain about Steve trying to convince you about the opposite. You could never.

“Well, I bet he still made you a promise of breaking a bone of mine or two if I ever hurt you. He’ll find energy for that, centenarian or not,” you hummed nonchalantly as you bounced off the doorframe, heading to the bathroom and leaving Steve puzzled by your remark.

“How did you know?” he called out after you, endearingly confused.

“That’s what big brothers do, love!”

Short silence was your answer as you reached for your toothbrush and begun your nighty ritual.

Steve must have figure out what did it mean for him, considering you had a protective brother of your own, because a moment later, his half-amused “noted!” reached your ears.

You chuckled and shook your head, smile spread on your face which you didn’t think could be erased as long as you were in this paradise – free of worry, full of joy. And why wouldn’t you be? You were about to marry one of the smartest, kindest, sassiest and most beautiful men that ever walked the Earth. What was not to love?

You couldn’t but let your mind wander again; if you had only known the day you met, right from that moment, that you’d end up here…. well. It felt a little surreal, knowing that by this time tomorrow, you’d be Steve’s wife; then again, Steve’s life story was surreal enough on its own.

Who would have thought that the stubborn handsome man in the ridiculous suit and you, equally stubborn about you at least checking on the wound upon half-dragging him to a quiet corner in a middle of a battlefield, would grow so close?

It hadn’t been simple. Steve wasn’t the most open guy and while friendly enough, he wasn’t exactly offering his heart on his sleeve, not to strangers. But it hadn’t been too hard, once you were meeting on regular basis. Piece by piece he revealed his true colours and soon after he did… you started falling; hard and fast.

Not necessarily swooning, not on the outside at least; you were a professional, after all. The safety and the well-being of the team was your priority.

It was just too bad – or the best thing, you supposed – that Steve had the same goal as you with one significant difference; as far as he was concerned, the responsibility to look after his team sometimes excluded him.

Oh, was he wrong about that.

And boy, did you let him know you thought so. You still kept proving him wrong to this day and was planning on nurturing his own acknowledgement of his self-worth till your last breath…

“Get your ass in here, Steve!” you called out after him, slowly losing patience as you had tried asking politely the previous two times with no result but being dismissed.

The change of tone and language made his head snap to you from where he was talking to Sam, an offended scowl on his face.

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me, Captain. Don’t be a stubborn jerk and get your ass in here so I can clean your cuts.”

A few months ago, you wouldn’t have been able to talk to him like that; to the great legend, Captain America. At least you certainly wouldn’t have called him his first name and maybe, just maybe, you’d be a little less crass. But now? He might be Captain America still, a hero who deserved all the good things for the sacrifices he made for the world’s safety, but first and foremost, he was just Steve to you.

A colleague, a teammate, a friend. You might not be a part of the team per se, not the way Clint, Natasha or Steve were, but you still belonged. And you were all friends.

Friends irritated each other sometimes and frankly, Steve was often battling with Tony for the mantle of the most infuriating one.

Friends also needed to call each other out on their bullshit by any means necessary when the time was right and now the time was as good as any.

Usually, Steve slipped through your fingers, because he was a supersoldier and the others weren’t, so their injuries took precedence; today, it was only Natasha, Sam and Steve, and the captain was the only one whom you hadn’t checked yet. And you knew there were things to check, the trickle of blood from his eyebrow probably the least of your concerns.

“I wouldn’t argue with her, Steve. She can be pretty stubborn. Clint wouldn’t stop complaining about it,” Natasha supported you from the pilot seat and you fought yourself so you wouldn’t grin at her in victory – it would only irritated Steve further. “She’s almost as bull-headed as you are.”

At that, your smile would have slipped. But honestly, she wasn’t wrong.

“Don’t I know it,” Steve grunted, sparing Sam another glance and when the Falcon himself beckoned to you as well, wordlessly asking Steve to get himself checked up.

The captain sighed irately, but made his way back to the separate and well-lit space of your examination room.

He didn’t try to hide his annoyance – in fact, he squared his shoulders and his steps sounded a bit loud for anyone to believe it was a coincidence. Also, the scowl of exasperation never left his otherwise handsome face.

“This is completely unnecessary. A stupid waste of time,” he hissed as he walked past you and you took a deep calming breath, exchanging an eyeroll with Sam before you disappeared from sight.

“Captain. I respect you and your position, but you say one more time that my job here is unnecessary and stupid, you’ll be looking for a new medic,” you retorted as he stripped the upper part of his uniform angrily, revealing his white-tank-top-clad torso.

Well, at least the fabric used to be white – now a blood stain the size of both of your palms was seeping into the material at Steve’s right side, gushing from what definitely appeared to be a knife wound.

You were gonna murder him one of those days... unless he got killed himself first.

“Seriously?!”

“It’s just a graze-” he started to argue but you cut him off when you tore the fabric away. He winced as some of the dried blood had acted as a glue, having stuck the cloth into the wound, and now was violently ripped off.

“Tr to insinuate again that I’m incompetent at recognizing what’s just a graze, Steve. I dare you. This is a cut wide and deep enough for stitches! Haven’t you had the serum, you could have been bleeding out to death on this table!”

“But I do have it-“

“Or for fuck’s SAKE, stop being a baby and let me treat the bloody gash in your right mesogastric area! The serum accelerates your healing, but it doesn’t make you invincible OR immortal as far as I know--- Jesus fucking Christ-!”

He bristled, taking a deep breath to fight back, but he never got the chance, because you started working and the words died in his throat. Surprisingly, inspecting the damage, poking around a knife wound that might have already begin to seal itself thanks to Erskine’s formula but had not been just a graze hurt and coincidentally, it pulled the rug from under his feet.

To his credit, Steve barely even hissed at the pain.

“Just so you know, I’ll be using the disinfection that stings worse,” you noted, voice dripping venom, because you were genuinely done with Steve’s bullshit.

You lied through your teeth though. You wouldn’t. No matter how infuriating Steve was and how difficult he made your life – causing you to fall for his stupid martyr ass and pine after him among other things – you would never purposely hurt him.

And he must have sensed that, because your remark didn’t earn you a murderous glare or a retort – much to your surprise.

In fact, Steve fell entirely quiet, watching you work without protest, not even objecting when you applied enough local anaesthetic to knock out an elephant and sewed the tissue together so it healed easier. He let you inspect the rest of his torso and bandage his ribs, vigorously shaking his head when you asked him if he was injured anywhere below the waist.

He observed you as you kept an eye on his face for any minute sign of pain he’d be hiding, but all you could see were his irises, startlingly bright blue, pools of honesty and something you had trouble decoding. He seemed… humbled almost. It silenced the anger inside you, the flames of rage – and fear for his well-being, if you were being honest with yourself – turning into a barely smouldering pile of ash.

When you moved on to his head, gently pushing away the strands which obscured the gash on his eyebrow, his eyelids slid shut. You knew how unpleasant facial injuries were, especially around one’s eyes and so you took care to be extra careful as you cleaned the wound and the area surrounding it, most definitely not using the stingy disinfectant.

Not that Steve could get an infection as far as you knew. It was more force of a habit than anything else… and it made you feel better. He had this idiotic mask of an invincible hero he put up sometimes and it drove you insane, because you knew he was only human, a beautiful kind soul, but god, could he be an ass.

“Almost done,” you whispered soothingly when you noticed his jaw tightening as you had to apply a bit more pressure to get a tiny piece of gravel from the cut. You certainly didn’t want that to stay under the newly healing skin.

The moment you retreated with the bloody gauze, Steve’s eyes were back on you, wide and regretful.

“I’m sorry,” he offered quietly, a genuine apology that sounded almost absurd after you two were hissing at each other like damn hellcats. “I didn’t mean to--- I’m sorry for being rude and ungrateful. Thank you for taking care of my injuries.”

One glance into those deep irises and benign hesitant smile and you were done for. How could you stay mad at him? Well, you were still mad at him for the absolute disregard of his own health, but… well. You also understood he felt like he needed to stay strong for the team and put them first and how he actually was in pain.

Pretty much everyone was a pain in the ass when in pain.

You sighed as you searched for few band-aid strips to cover the cut.  

“It’s alright, Steve. I’m used to old men being grumpy and not meaning things they say when they are,” you offered lightly and he hung his head with a chuckle, clearly not taking the old man remark personally – and understanding you were referring to your brother.

His smile was wider when he looked up again. “You shouldn’t have to be used to it.”

You shrugged, carefully slipping two fingers under his chin to angle his face so you could stick the strips over the wound.

“Well, I deserve it sometimes. I don’t mean to… to be overbearing and make you feel like you’re incompetent or something,” you added hesitantly, worrying your teeth over your lower lip as the tone you’d been handling him with caught up with you. Perhaps you could have been nicer.

You smoothened the stripes of band-aid, gulping as you felt Steve’s gaze boring into your face while you continued.

“I know you’re not incompetent. You’re very capable, you’re the best. It’s just… I still--- worry- for all of you. For the full-time Earth’s mightiest heroes. Silly, huh?” you muttered self-depreciatingly and when your eyes met, you were startled by the intensity he watched you with as you laid your fears bare in front of him, leaving you vulnerable. You swiftly looked away and dropped your hands. “Here, almost as good as new.”

A lump grew in your throat as you stripped your gloves, tossing them into the bin. Did you reveal too much? Didn’t it sound silly indeed as you said it out loud? Yes, you were all friendly with each other, but you were supposed to be a professional, focused on your task, not getting distracted by-

-by Steve gently grasping your wrist, causing your heart to skip a startled beat. Definitely not getting weak in the knees when you shot him a surprised glance and he just… brought your hand to his face, lips briefly skimming over your knuckles.

Jesus Christ, Lord have mercy with me.

“Don’t you ever apologize for caring. Don’t stop caring. Silly is the last thing I’d call it.”

Your cheeks felt like set on fire, stomach fluttering as well as your heart. You could feel the ghost of Steve’s lips on your skin, sending your heartrate sky-high, causing your head to spin a bit, your body hot all over.

Did he really���did he just-? And did it mean that… did it mean anything at all?

He let go of your hand, thumb brushing over your knuckles, but held your gaze adamantly as he gave you a sad smile and rose to his feet, clearly ready to leave.

You, on the hand, stood there frozen, mind racing.

Why had he done that? Was he really just trying to express gratitude and say sorry for his previous behaviour? Because that was not the way it was supposed to be done, because such tenderness left you entirely bewildered. Was he trying to tell you he was somehow interested in something more than friendship? Was he just high from the anaesthetic, mind you, local one that was not supposed to mess with his brain? Was there any sign of a head injury you missed?

“Thank you, again,” he whispered softly, moving to sidestep you and your hand instinctively shot out, latching onto his forearm… gently.

You gulped, heart stuttering when he glanced at you, puzzled.

One part of you wanted to sink into the floor in embarrassment at your unwitting reaction. Another part of you observed him so closely that you would swear that there was another emotion in his eyes and it was neither apology nor gratitude. You wistfully hoped for longing, the same longing you felt when you were near him, sometimes distant and barely there, other times so acute it hurt.

With your stomach somersaulting in doubt, you willed yourself to raise your free hand slowly, purposely giving him a chance – Lord, please, don’t let him take it – to stop you before your palm settled on his cheek.

You were certain you experienced a small cardiac arrest when Steve not only didn’t avoid the touch, but actually leaned into it, gaze fixed on your face, eyes brighter and softer than you ever remembered seeing. Your gaze flickered to his mouth deliberately, throat turning dry. Too daring? He kissed you knuckles, surely you could reciprocate some affection?

Swallowing against your dry throat, you leaned in before you could change your mind and dropped the briefest peck to his lips, causing his eyelids to flutter shut.

Oh no. Oh no no no no, you totally crossed a line-

You went to retreat your hands from him, but the second you moved, his eyes were snapping open, hand covering yours on his face to keep it there, the other cradling your face and then there was a warm and soft sensation on your own lips as he seized them with his.

Your mind went completely blank save two single thoughts: Steve is kissing me. I really like that.

A small sound escaped you, a blend of surprise and contentment, breaking you from your trance and turning you into an actual participant of the pleasant and entirely unexpected activity.

You drew in a small breath, head spinning from the scent of Steve’s shampoo, disinfectant, sweat and something you couldn’t quite put your finger on and not caring.

He tasted faintly of blood, but otherwise was nothing but sweet as his lips caressed yours, gently tugging at your lower lip and then the upper, the lightest graze of teeth and tease of tongue, finger pressing into your jaw to pull you closer, thumb stroking your cheek.

You whimpered involuntarily when his lips parted from yours, soothing as they returned for a short peck, to drop a brief kiss to the corner of your mouth, to brush your cheek.

Your name was a breathy whisper between the two of you, barely audible as all you could hear was your heartbeat pulsing frantically in your ears, growing aware of your fingers clutching at Steve’s still unzipped armour and nearly sinking in his hair, his hot breath tickling your skin.

You didn’t dare to open your eyes – what if you dreamed it up? What if you looked at him and saw regret – it didn’t feel like he would be regretting it, but… still. Insecurity tugged at your mind as it slowly cleared from the literally breath-taking kiss.

Steve repeated your name with urgency that was unheard of, the single word sounding almost as a plea.

“Please say something.”

Oh.

You blinked your eyes open, surprised to be met with his searching gaze, a minute furrow of his brows. It seemed you weren’t the only one whose mind was being the worst of one’s enemies.

Perhaps your brain was being stupid. Perhaps you both wanted this. Perhaps you felt exactly the same.

As you forced yourself to move, fingers actually slipping into his hair to caress his nape, Steve inhaled shakily, shoulders slumping. The tinniest of smiles tugged at his mouth, tempting red and minutely swollen from the kiss; you had to resist the urge to just taste it again.

Instead, you licked your lips only, savouring the previous sensations, smiling unwittingly.

“That’s… uhm, that’s a really creative new way of driving me crazy.”

Steve’s eyebrows rose along with one corner of his mouth, relief written all over his face.

“Oh? There are other ways in which I’m driving you crazy? Because I couldn’t tell...”

You narrowed your eyes, but you didn’t think he bought you unconvincing act of being irritated with him at such remark.

“Don’t push it, Captain,” you warned him, but your treacherous mouth kept curling up in a smile, your body still buzzing with aftershocks of the kiss.

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Uh-huh… s-sure,” you stuttered briefly as his thumb caressed your cheek, bright smiling eyes watching only inches from your face – and yet it felt like he was too far.

“You’re driving me crazy too, you know,” he noted in a breathy voice, causing you to gulp as his gaze flickered to your mouth, clearly implying how you do so… among other ways… like your stubbornness practically matching his.

“Oh really? I do? I couldn’t tell…”

He chuckled, his hand slipping to your nape, soft tickle of his fingers making you squirm.

“I’m gonna kiss you again now if that’s okay,” he whispered, not waiting for your permission and erasing the distance between your lips again.

Still, you whispered your approval to his mouth.

“So okay…”

Long moments later when Sam called out to warn you that you’d be landing soon, you said yes to the grumpy old man’s request to let him treat you dinner.

Oh if you only knew by then how far you’d come…

Lost in thought, goofy smile on your face, you exited the bathroom, ready to snuggle your future husband… and to fully take the opportunity to make love, last night before you officially became his and he became yours.

You had a brief second to register that the bed was empty, your heart skipping a started and disappointed beat. The second you stepped out though, you were literally swept off your feet.

A yelp erupted from your throat as you found yourself with no ground under your feet and high in the air, one of Steve’s arms under your knees, the other under your back. Your hands frantically gripped at the nearest firm point, Steve’s shoulder and arm as you finally realized what the hell happened and was met with a cheeky grin and sparkling blue of his eyes.

That traitor was waiting just by the door to ambush you! Why?

You slapped his very much bare shoulder playfully, hissing a curse, not unaware of the heat radiating of him and seeping into your skin.

“You jerk! You almost gave me a heart attack!” you complained, but he didn’t even have the decency to look apologetic.

“Sorry, sweetheart.”

“No, you’re not.”

Steve grinned wider, shrugging and pulling you closer to his torso, nuzzling your temple and dropping a placatory kiss there.

“Still looking a little cold.”

“No, I look like this because you scared me,” you emphasized, vainly trying to resist the seduction; a mixture of playfulness, sweetness and blatant display of strength as he still held you with ease. It was hard not to be temped. “And you look like you’re awfully warm, parading here without a shirt.”

“Well, I’d call us even since you’re parading around in these absolutely sinful shorts. Makes me hot. I can warm you up,” he mumbled to your skin, lips moving to your ear, causing you to shudder.

How was it so easy for him to make you all hot and bothered? You guessed that at least, as he said, it made you even... it wasn’t difficult to get him riled up either.

“You’re incorrigible.”

“Driving you crazy?” Steve offered, sounding awfully delighted at the idea and you only melted into him further at the reminiscence of your first kiss and what followed.

“Always,” you confirmed, deadly serious, but you couldn’t help the smile tugging at the corners of your lips or the mewl that escaped you when his teeth grazed the shell of your ear, warm breath tickling the sensitive skin of your neck.

“But you love it.”

“Uh-huh…”

“I can live with that with that then,” he said, stalking to the bed determinately. “Now let me drive you so crazy you can barely speak and the only sound you’re making is whimpering my name.”

He all but tossed you on the bed, a yelp of his name in fact erupting from your throat, followed by a fit of giggles that only died when his mouth seized yours, his lips only leaving when heading south to indeed drive you crazy.

And yes; you loved it.

And you loved him too.

In one unending moment I fall within your reach My song a sweet surrender Hold on to me Hold on to me

Before the girls could steal you from him, Steve decided – with your enthusiastic agreement – that you should once again try how it felt to make some morning lovin’ outside marriage. With the ceremony planned for the late afternoon, you had plenty of time; and needless to say, it was bliss. Then again, you believed that marital sex with Steve would be just as delightfully pleasant, thank you very much.

Then, it was a whirlwind – make up, hair, dress, a tear or two spilled when you saw the result in the mirror.

More tears spilled when you glanced out of the window and saw the tastefully and modestly decorated arch, the path created by few scattered rose petals, the male part of your almost family sans Clint in the suits, effectively hiding Steve from you; and you from his just in case, because no one wanted any bad luck.

Your staring was interrupted when your brother went to pick you up to lead you down the aisle.

Upon entering the room and setting his gaze on you, he promptly looked away with a sniffle. It both warmed your heart and made you laugh as did his remark.

“Nope, not giving you to him. In fact, I’m never giving you to anyone. No one will ever be worthy, so I’m keeping you.”

“Hush, Clinton, you’ll still have me,” Natasha winked at him as he took a deep calming breath before carefully eyeing you again.

Clearly, it hadn’t done the job, because few tears still found their way down his cheeks.

“You’re a knock-out, sis,” he sputtered hastily, but no less honestly – clearly moved to tears.

And yet… you snorted at his choice of words and he rolled his eyes, quick to compliment your beauty instead.

You wouldn’t have it any other way though, even appreciating his first remark more for it came from the bottom of his heart rather than from what convention required.

Embracing you carefully in fear he would mess up the work of art his wife and other girls created, he held you in his arms for a moment, as you retuned the hug, clutching at his suit with a little too force. From the corner of your eye, you noticed the bridesmaids clearing the room.

“It’s not like I’m leaving you, Bobo,” you hummed with a smile, throwing his own words from last night at him.

And you weren’t leaving him; your heart swelled with love for your brother, your father figure, your long-life friend.

With sniffle, he let go of you and looked you up and down, proud smile spreading on his lips.

“It’s okay. If you are, I have the best spy in the world for a wife, we’ll drag your ass back home.”

You just slapped his chest playfully and took a deep breath – it was time. Clint grasped your hand firmly then, elbows interlocking, and went to step out just a moment after the bridesmaids left to join the groomsmen.

Well-aware everyone was going to stare and that Steve awaited you at the end of the aisle to marry you, your legs were shaking minutely as the magnitude of the event finally dawned to you.

“Getting second thoughts now?” Clint teased you, eliciting a chuckle from you and shake of your head.

What a question.

“No. Just… please don’t let me fall,” you muttered to him, entirely serious and grateful for your choice of footwear – simple flats hidden by the long flowing skirt of your dress. Better chance of not spraining your ankle on your wedding day.

“Never.”

Clint squeezed your hand under his warm palm and you took a deep breath, stepping into the doorway. Soft melody welcomed you, your very own wedding march Bruce was playing on a mouth organ – something you had previously had no idea he was capable of.  

Looking up from your skirt, you feasted your eyes on the company and the beautiful scenery for only a regretfully short moment, grateful for Sam’s Redwing programmed to record and take photos.

Your gaze instinctively searched the small crowd instead, until it fell under the arch where three men stood.

One of them was Sam himself, having obtained a licence so he could be your wedding registrar; he looked positively dashing. So did Bucky, who patted his best friend dressed in his old-fashioned green captain uniform on the shoulder, his smirk visible even from tens feet away as he stepped back.

Naturally, your gaze lingered on Steve, your feet acting of their own accord and following your brother’s lead.

Gosh, your future husband was the most handsome and absolutely hottest specimen to ever walk the Earth. Hair combed neatly to one side and in his old army uniform, he truly looked like the gentleman from another era he was and yet, he undeniably belonged exactly where he was. His eyes were bright and blue just like the sky, lips slightly parting before curling up into a brilliant smile which somehow still carried the tenderness he treated you with when he felt particularly affectionate.

He must have uttered something under his breath, because Bucky pressed his lips together as if he was holding back laugh. The absolutely best best man, ladies and gentleman.

Your found yourself smiling just as widely, a stray tear tickling the corner of your eye and you had to fight the sudden urge to ditch Clint in order to gather your skirts and run the rest of the way just to jump into Steve’s arms.

But in reality, there was no rush – here, on the damn island Tony rented, there was so much time that one short walk meant nothing in comparison.

“Alright, maybe I’ll give you to him,” Clint whispered, making you bite the inside of your cheek so you would cackle.

Leave it to your brother he would find Steve Rogers so fine he’d be willing to give you out just to have him become a part of your family.

One corner of Steve’s lips twitched in amusement – supersoldier hearing didn’t miss the remark then. Good. Then Bucky heard it too and you had a witness just in case Clint would change his mind. Again.

Finally, with your heart almost in your throat, you reached the end of the aisle, Clint gently putting your hand into Steve’s… without letting go.

“You be nice to her, Cap. And I mean really nice, you hear? Or else-“

“Hush,” you hissed good-naturedly in your brother’s direction, winking at him before you returned your gaze to Steve. “Hey there, handsome.”

Steve chuckled under his breath when Clint stepped back. He returned the greeting with soft ‘hey there, beautiful’ and then proceeded to lift your joined hands, brushing your knuckles with his lips – just like the day you shared your first kiss.

Well now you truly found yourself on the verge of crying. And Lord, you wanted to kiss him so much-

Sam cleared his throat loudly, casting you both a meaningful look as if he could read your mind and wanted to remind you that there were a few things to go through before that could happen.

Ugh. Formalities. Just let me kiss him…

Steve licked his lips – the audacity! – and turned, lightly tugging at your hand so you both faced your friend who held a little leather book open, beckoning towards the guests: Bucky and Natasha, the best man and the best woman, Clint, Bruce, Tony, Vision, Wanda, Sharon, Pepper. Just your closest friends and family.

Sam cleared his throat again.

“Alright. We all know why we gathered here today. To get these two amazing people married, so they could officially become a special team within our team.”

You grinned, peripherally noticing Steve eyeing you as well. Team indeed.

“This is the part where I would ask all of you, bride and groom included, to speak up now if you’re aware of anything standing in the way of this wedlock or to remain silent forever. But frankly, if you have something to say, right now is the perfect time to keep it to yourself. Just let these lovebirds get married…”

Muffled laughter and giggles erupted from your group. Honestly, you wouldn’t say it better. You noticed Clint shifting and Natasha forcefully holding his hand down; you bit down on your lip so you wouldn’t laugh and sent her a grateful smile instead. The best maid of honour ever.

“Good, that’s what I wanted to hear, folks. We have the rings, correct? Great. Just so you know, these two saps asked me to read one vow which they are making to each other, because they didn’t trust themselves to say theirs individually without bursting into tears. So now it’s left to me to cry instead. Thanks for that.”

Your cheeks were honestly starting to hurt from smiling so wide, but tears prickled in your eyes acutely just at the thought of the vow you agreed on. You spent countless hours thinking about what you wanted to say and realized that your vow would be too long and that you would in fact start crying and that you could never name all the things you loved Steve for. It had been a relief to find out that Steve shared the sentiment and the deal was made.

Natasha and Bucky dutifully laid the rings on the pillow Wanda’s powers held levitating by your and Steve’s side – not without Bucky finding a split second to compliment your appearance and earning a brief smirk from Steve.

“I know,” Steve uttered and you wondered if there was a dare going around as to who would make you burst out laughing first.

This was your wedding dammit. You could be at least a bit a lady and remain collected.

Hardly.

“With this ring,” Sam started, breathing in and out and you knew you already lost, first tear rolling down your cheek as you gazed into Steve’s inviting eyes, “I give myself to you without giving up myself. With this ring, I surrender to you for I have faith you understand the value of wielding such power and for I deem you worthy of it. With this ring, I promise to love you, to respect you and to support you to be your best self as I trust you to do the same for me, for us.”

You blinked away the waterfalls, reaching almost blindly for Steve’s ring and with fingers trembling – with giddiness, not nerves – you somehow succeeded at slipping it on his left ring finger.

“I do,” you whispered, your voice cracking even in such simple sentence and the watery smile Steve graced you with made your ribcage feel too small for your swelling heart.

Fingers equally clumsy, he slipped a ring on you as well, shoulders squaring as if in pride.

“I do,” he said firmly, the damp path down his left cheek only adding severity to his vow.

“You may-- uhm, okay, you may kiss the bride, your wife--- I mean, Mrs. Rogers. You may kiss the groom, your husband…” Sam mumbled under his breath until he didn’t, because Steve pulled you in for a kiss the same moment Sam said the first ‘may’ and incidentally, the same moment you practically threw yourself at Steve.

Laughter and whistles erupted from the group of your friends as Steve bend you back dramatically, the determined press of his lips to yours not at all disrupted by the change of angle, claiming your mouth in ways that made you shudder and stirred flames in your belly.

Years and years later, you’d recall that kiss and realized an amazing thing; how it felt just like your first kiss, your last one, and every single one in between.

With you still practically horizontal, Steve’s crinkling eyes met yours, delighted smile on his kiss-swollen lips.

“I love you, Mrs. Rogers,” he hummed, adding a cheeky grin. “You’re stuck with me now.”

“The horror,” you muttered back teasingly, pulling at his nape, demanding another kiss, your own declaration whispered to his mouth. “I love you too, Mr. Rogers.”

And you did. Gosh, you did.

S.R. masterlist

(divider by firefly-graphics)

Well. This turned out SO DIFFERENTLY than I anticipated and SO MUCH LONGER. If you feel like leaving feedback, I’ll be grateful. If not, well. *shurgs*

Excuse me while I go and continue dreaming of ONE fictional man. Ugh. Anyway.

Thank you for reading!

And once again, thanks to WIYBUPT for hosting and for just being awesome in general :)

[starshipsofstarlord]

Can you do part 2 of chandelier?

Chandelier

This is part to to this imagine, find it here

Pairing | dark!Wanda Maximoff x reader

Summary | the suburban life that you have been locked in soon takes a turn whence another being, with radiating power is revealed to be causing such destruction. Perhaps Wanda isn’t the bad guy, or at least, not the worst villain that has you under their thumb. Witches, and their possessiveness!

Warnings | mentions of death, violence, witches, magic, imprisonment, angst, spoilers for Wandavision. I fixed the Ralph Bohner plot because I could

Quick link to my masterlist, if you’re interested in reading more of my crap 😬

Time had surpassed, and continuing to live under the restrictions of Wanda hadn’t been so bad. She was your wife, the Maximoff that owned your heart, a red beam of scarlet that floated around in the depths of your head. Her influence left a pressure inside of you, a mark and a reminder to her that you belonged to her.

One thing that you knew for certain, was that you needed to escape these red restrictions, and break free of this place that you were forced to call home. It was tough to slip from the penetrating gaze of the possessive redhead, but to your luck, your nosey neighbour had decided, on this fine evening, to walking into the kitchen, and stir up some gossip with your partner.

Agnes, as she went by. It always seemed like she wanted to be away from that husband Ralph of hers, but you couldn’t blame her, you wanted nothing more than to escape the possessiveness of your wife. She was no longer the same woman that you had met, she was crafted by loss, that tormented her into being a captive. Using the excuse of protecting you to her advantage, claiming that you would not appreciate what lay on the outside of Westview.

Party girls don't get hurt

Can't feel anything, when will I learn?

I push it down, push it down

I'm the one "for a good time call"

But you couldn’t help but feel completed as you reached the borders of the town. It was surreal, you felt ecstatic to leave this little prison, that was in deep disguise to convince all residents that their home was real, and not all an illusion painted by a certain redhead. She saw you as a new canvas, which she kept overlapping with white paint to make blank for another piece of mindful artwork.

Turning once more, to ensure that the woman of your nightmares hadn’t decided to appear behind you, within a second, you lurched forward, pushing your body through her borders, feeling each atom in your atom tug apart and put itself back together, as you fought with just your own body to break through the access and exit point of her false reality.

That’s all this was, an illusion, masked in amounts of power that could possibly kill you. But death by attempted escape was better than remaining here, in this vast plain, that was all meant to occupy the mind, fooling it into thinking that this was a normal life. Instead, you knew how absurd it was, there were tweaks every now and then, until you were transferred into a different time.

Right now, you were in the 2000s, but you needed to get back to 2023, the real time line, the universe outside of these red orbits that stood strong, and pained your skin, pushing a power that you did not know that you could feel beneath your flesh, making your body burn from your withdrawal from its sharp contents.

Phone's blowin' up, ringin' my doorbell

I feel the love, feel the love

One, two, three, one, two, three, drink

One, two, three, one, two, three, drink

One, two, three, one, two, three, drink

One. Two. Three. A yell bellowed from your throat as you fell out to the other side, collapsing on the ground, as your fingertips dug into the surface below. For a moment you frowned, before you glanced behind you, seeing the grand gesture of magic in its place, and you out of your own. You picked dirt up with your hands, it felt real, not like molecules that had been wedged together to create the appearance of such a natural substance.

The sound of footsteps had you rolling over, preparing to attack whomever had decided to disturb your peace, crouching on your knees as you glared up. It was a woman, one that you vaguely remembered, before your ever so loving wife had informed you that she had moved away, something about her mother not feeling well. All though, that may have been an illusion too, for all you were aware.

Nobody escaped Westview, until you. There was no route out, you were sure the chase wasn’t over, Wanda would come after you, numbing your mind with her tugging hands, that swirled with her red essence. The woman emitted grave power, and you far well knew that she would use it for when the time came. She would make you her prisoner once more, a dull and empty shell that would be ordered to do nothing more than return her affections with a plastered smile.

“Geraldine?” You asked nervously, realising that the woman appeared far different than the version of her within the Hex. She had portrayed nothing more than a fine friend to the deluded woman, supporting her magic show and coming over for tea in the morning, until she mentioned... Sokovia. Sokovia, her home, that had fallen against the battle with Ultron! You remembered!

Throw 'em back 'til I lose count

I'm gonna swing from the chandelier

From the chandelier

I'm gonna live like tomorrow doesn't exist

Like it doesn't exist

“Geraldine doesn’t exist.” She smiled softly, holding out a hand so that she could assist you to your feet. With sly eyes, you took it, untrusting of anyone at the moment. “My name is Monica, I have the intent of stopping your wife, she’s dangerous. She’s expanding these borders, and soon, I have no doubt that she will eat up the whole world, turning it into her playground.”

Playgrounds. They had been another thing that you noticed specked around the town, though there never seemed to be any children to play in them. That gave you some relief, unless they were locked up, stowed away to be kept of the suburban life. Wanda didn’t want children anyway, she wanted you, her baby, her fine darling, her pet. You were nothing more than a decoration within her false realm, a means to keep a smile stretched upon her sinister face, and a stopper to her darting red eyes.

And thus you stood on your own feet, no scarlet shadow behind you, whispering thoughts that were not your own in through your ear. Gulping, you looked Monica up and down, nervously seeing if she were to fade into the air, as many things did when the times changed, as they converted into more modern alternatives. A part of you had wished that you would grow with the changes, become stronger, become a free woman.

“I am not her wife.” You admitted aloud, feeling a heavy weight roll off your chest. There, you had said it, and for the first time, you hoped that the redhead heard you, you could imagine her scowl right now. That, that would be something that was sure as hell real, and not a part of her sketch script, her sitcoms were curtains.

They could be opened or closed, but often of a night, were shut to keep the silhouettes of monsters out. She was the monster, hiding from herself and the reality that she had came from. Though, the woman could not accept that she was the villain here. The creator of the dialysis that was affecting the lives of many, but for what purpose.

I'm gonna fly like a bird through the night

Feel my tears as they dry

I'm gonna swing from the chandelier

From the chandelier

But I'm holding on for dear life

“We have to stop her.” Monica spoke, getting out of the vehicle, you following behind her, as she moved closer to the collateral red veil that reached high up into the sky. Sounds from Jimmy insisted that she remain, and that another way in could be found, but all of you knew that was a long shot. And there was no time to wait around, not as purple grates were seen through the crimson walls of her boundaries, bursting like fireworks against her protection system.

And thus, you, gulping down the sensations of fear prickling at your fingers, followed after Monica, whom walked through the moulded fire, stepping into the plain that digressed your body, pulling it as though it were trying to reform your genes, affecting your DNA. As you succumbed to the sensations, you felt a burst in your chest, an ignition of something greater deep inside you.

But unlike Wanda, you were not going to use it for your own sinful convenience, you were going to stop her. You gasped as you fell out the other side, your limbs feeling like they were aflame, askew with treacherous fire. Turning to Monica, you saw that her eyes had transformed into an ambient blue, piercing your soul.

Won't look down, won't open my eyes

Keep my glass full until morning light

'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight

Help me, I'm holding on for dear life

Won't look down, won't open my eyes

“Your skin.” She spiked, raising her hand to her own cheek as she looked upon you. It was separated into sections, adjoined by the bone, as neon orange kept it attached, like cracks that had yet to be partitioned. There was no time for idly finding a mirror to squalor through at your own appearance though, no. You had returned to this hell for one reason only, and that was put an end to all this consuming madness.

And so, the pair of you walked through the town, not having to go far until you saw the ongoing battle. Agnes, as you had known her, was in the sky, along with you alleged wife, purple robes floating from her body, her hair crazed and wild, much like her eyes. She was no friendly neighbour, she was a reaper coming out to play, throwing lilac bursts of power towards Wanda, whom returned the favour with her own red energy.

“How do we get to them?” Rambeau asked, frowning as she watched their exchange with worried irises. To answer her question, your body aligned itself to rise, transcending towards the two warriors, your eyes hot and fiery as they flared remarkably at the sight of the bewitched competition.

At your presence, Agnes smirked, and Wanda’s face paled, soaking in the sight of your skin glowing with your own source of power. “If it isn’t your wife, just on time to join us for the main course.” Your nose curled at the sound of her distorted voice, as your head raised itself, glaring upon the scene. “There’s something different about you, I can’t quite put my finger on it.”

Keep my glass full until morning light

'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight, on for tonight

Sun is up, I'm a mess

Gotta get out now, gotta run from this

Here comes the shame, here comes the shame

To emphasise her point, she emitted a pulse of her magic towards you, it hitting deep in the pit of your chest. Though, it didn’t explode, or send you hurtling back, instead it grew brawlingly in your chest, brewing like a potion, and expanding every human structure that you could feel kept your skeleton upright.

As your head fall, and you remained in your place, Wanda frowned, head tilting as a crown appeared upon her forehead. She could not understand how you had changed so clearly. You were definitely not her wife, you were an image of her enemy, floating alongside her, standing for your cause. That was to end her, and this place she had formatted to become her home; your home.

When she had learnt of your betrayal, escaping whilst she was distracting by this opposer of hers, she had been filled with various emotions. Angry was one definition of how she had felt, but another had been determined. She was determined to get you back, and wash away all thoughts of ever leaving her again. But as she looked upon you, for some reason, she knew that her tricks wouldn’t work.

One, two, three, one, two, three, drink

One, two, three, one, two, three, drink

One, two, three, one, two, three, drink

Throw 'em back 'til I lose count

I'm gonna swing from the chandelier

“What are you?” She asked in that distressed accent of hers. What were you? It was unknown, or at least to your own knowledge, you were a vision, a bird set free, no longer trapped behind the bars of a cage. Wanda tried to thrust your to the side with her elegant will, but instead of obeying her technical whim, you tilted your head.

It came as a shock to you as well, having expected to be thrown around by her wishes, but instead, you remained, only absorbing her tainted force, your hair blowing from the sweeping of the stormy wind as you poised the two witches with your amber gaze, keeping your pupils locked on them, as a hurricane rounded through the air, grabbing every form of their power.

The walls of the Hex slowly faded, swirling in the air before coming on command towards you, roping around your limbs before sinking into your flesh, leaving Agatha with a studying from onto her trialed face. She was watching, rather than fighting with you, picking out the little details like she had done with Wanda.

From the chandelier

I'm gonna live like tomorrow doesn't exist

Like it doesn't exist

I'm gonna fly like a bird through the night

Feel my tears as they dry

She was the scarlet witch, the most powerful sorceress of all, but you indeed were something else. Monica squinted from below, as she saw a streak of blue oncoming towards her, his willpower transcending through her, as he crumbled mistakenly to the ground.

He was a fake, or was he. As he tripped, Monica caught sight of the flaring purple beads around his neck, and thus, she knelt upon his chest, as she looked at them. This Pietro was being controlled, and she assumed it was through the ancient jewellery, and so, she pulled it from around his neck, scattering the beads upon the street.

As the man looked up, he was astounded. There was a fiery bird igniting in the sky, its wingspan spreading far, as it reigned terror upon all. He was amazed to see the sight once more... she was supposed to be dead. She had sacrificed herself, turned into particles within the universe. But it seemed as though the winged creature, pardoned by great force lived on.

I'm gonna swing from the chandelier

From the chandelier

But I'm holding on for dear life

Won't look down, won't open my eyes

Keep my glass full until morning light

'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight

Help me, I'm holding on for dear life

“Jean?” He whispered to himself, with a frown, his hand covering his mouth as he thought of his old friend that had facaded into meandering smithereens. Monica sighed at the man, walking closer, as she crossed her arms, looking down upon where he had crashed, and was laying upon the ground.

“Ralph Bohner?” She asked, watching as the stranger frowned at the title that she assumed of hun. With speed, he assisted himself up, brushing his hands on his legs, as he kept blinking up at the apocalyptic sky.

“No, I feel sorry for a dude with that name.” He lightly chuckled, finding the boner joke rather hilarious. “Peter Maximoff is the name, my fine lady.” She shook her head at his efforts but... Maximoff? What about Pietro?

Won't look down, won't open my eyes

Keep my glass full until morning light

'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight

On for tonight, on for tonight

“She’s the dark Phoenix.” Agatha gulped, her face contorting into one of fear and worry as she looked on at the way your arms spread like an eagle, igniting with their flame like aura. She had heard ancient stories, but they were not from this time. And here you were, facing off against her and the scarlet witch.

They had no chance against you, but Wanda did not know that, and as she readied to face off with you, she found herself being pushed to the ground, by nothing more than your stern gaze. Agatha too was pulled in by your sway, as you forced both to descend, and be grounded.

With a curve of your neck, they found themselves trapped against telephone lines, lines of their own magic pulling at them like strands. They were tied up, like the witches of old, powerless to those that stalked them.

'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight

Oh, I'm just holding on for tonight

On for tonight, on for tonight

'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight

All of a sudden, Wanda felt overcome with regret, as she was put in this position. She tried to escape, but Agnes as she had called herself priorly shook her head at the silly girl, understanding that this was the end.

“We are no match for her Wanda. She is not a witch, she is being far more powerful. Fall to her mercy, or you will receive the brunt of it.” Westview had fallen, and thus, Wanda realised that by taking you, you had taken everything right back from her, reciprocating the notion that she had described to be love.

She held on, wanting the night to be over, as she saw Monica, the woman that had tried to help her, behind you. And the man that had posed as her biological brother. There was no hope left for her, no saving her. In the end, she had became the villain. Her and Agatha were not so different after all.

'Cause I'm just holding on for tonight

Oh, I'm just holding on for tonight

On for tonight, on for tonight

[prettyboybarzal]

lessons in romance // nate mackinnon x reader

summary: nate mackinnon is really bad at keeping a steady girlfriend. so bad that’s become somewhat of a joke between him and the boys. but you come along and try to set him straight.

word count: 14k+

author’s note: it’s finally here. i’m honestly surprised at how fast i cranked this out... which is actually a LOT longer than most people write on here so mayb i shouldn’t brag lmao! this fic was inspired by THIS gifset. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE give me feedback/reblog!!!!!!

warnings: smut (i jumped out of my comfort zone people. i finally wrote some lmfao) & mentions of a past toxic ex

Weekends were better spent in bed or visiting family, not sitting in a crowded bar with men who reminded you slightly of your ex-boyfriend. You were probably overreacting a little bit because the guys truly meant well, but their overly boy-ish energy was startlingly similar to that of your ex. Maybe a few more drinks would help the cause and you could get passed the sex jokes.

Mel Landeskog was the reason you were there. She wouldn’t take no for an answer, much like her husband, and so you were sitting across the booth from some of the largest men you’d ever seen in your life. Gabe gave you the rundown of their names as they arrived though the only one you could remember was Cale. He was a perpetually blushing 21-year-old named after a vegetable; how could you forget him?

“Do you think Nate’s upset about this one?” Cale asked. The new topic of conversation was their friends’ disastrous date since he texted to tell them he was broken up with and was on his way to them. “They were sort of serious.”

“We’re about to find out,” Gabe announced, nodding towards the entrance of the bar. Nate was on his way to the booth, tired smile on his lips. As he got closer, he started shaking his head and the table erupted in chirps at his expense.

You recognized him from earlier at the Landeskog’s pregame. He was slipping out of the front door as you stepped in. His cologne was the type the good-looking guys always wear, and you weren’t disappointed when you looked up at him. He was handsome with the sleeves of his dress shirt rolled to his elbows and the top three buttons undone, and when he smiled, you all but swallowed your tongue.

He began to greet his teammates. The chain around his neck caught the light of the DJ booth and you found yourself gazing at it. You tore your eyes away from the gold at the sound of Mel’s voice introducing you.

“This is my girlfriend, YN, from my Saturday morning Cycle class,” she said. “And, YN, this is my husband’s boyfriend, Nate MacKinnon.”

He threw his head back in a laugh at Mel’s joke as he extended a hand to you. “Nice to meet you.”

You listened to the quips from his teammates, each one with their own opinion about Nate’s relationship or lack thereof. It seemed like this wasn’t the first time in recent months that he’d been broken up and it had become somewhat of a spectacle to the boys. Mel, who’d seen this song and dance one too many times, wrapped her fingers around your elbow and tugged you with her towards the bar.

“What was that about?”

“Nate can’t hold down a girlfriend,” she explained. “It’s been a joke since he first came here because they almost all have the same issue with him.”

“And what is that?”

“He’s not romantic enough.”

You glanced back over your shoulder and watched the boys laughing amongst each other. It looked like they were celebrating as they lifted their beers in a sad looking toast, and it hit you right where it hurt.

You really saw your ex-boyfriend in the group now and, though you tried not to make assumptions, you found it hard to set the first impression aside. The liquor in your system didn’t help. With each joke about his dating misadventures, you became less of a fan of him and by the end of the night you were bubbling over in annoyance.

Gabe and Mel offered Nate a ride home towards the end of the night and you managed to keep your expression neutral when he accepted. As they headed out to grab the car, you and Nate waited at the curb several feet away from each other.

“I’m sorry about your break up,” you offered after a moment of silence. The statement came out more like a question and Nate’s lips quirked up into a smirk at the inflection of your voice. “Sorry, I just can’t tell if you’re upset or not, so I don’t know if I should even offer my condolences.”

“I’m, uh, I’m not upset,” he began. “I saw it coming.”

“How so?”

“Let’s just say this isn’t the first time a girl’s broken up with me for not being romantic enough,” he said. Thoughts were filling your head faster than you could make sense of them. There was no reason for the situation to annoy you as much as it did. You didn’t know this guy and the odds that you ever saw him again were slim.

“So, if it’s not the first time, why hasn’t anything changed?”

“Excuse me?” he asked. There was a crease between his eyebrows. He hadn’t been expecting you to respond like that. You shouldn’t have. It wasn’t your business

“I mean, you act like a martyr when you probably would be successful in love if you just put in the romantic effort these girls are craving,” you said. Your anger had begun to boil over and words were spilling from your mouth faster than you could stop them. “Guys like you are the worst. You lead girls on and make them think they’re special. Next thing they know, they’ve been wasting time on you and your lack of effort.”

The comment made Nate take a step away from you. His eyebrows drew together in shock and confusion. As you spoke, he turned his body to you and crossed his arms over his chest. The moment you closed your mouth, he interjected. “You don’t even know me.”

“I don’t have to,” you argued, turning to him. You were in a stand-off with a man several inches taller than you, and to any passerby it probably looked a little bit funny, but you weren’t backing down. “I know guys like you. I’ve dated guys like you.”

Before Nate could continue arguing, the Landeskogs pulled up to the curb. Mel hollered out for you two and the topic of conversation was dropped.

---

You regretted everything you said to Nate the moment you woke up the morning after. It wasn’t like you to be so rude, especially not to someone you didn’t know. Your heart stopped every time Mel texted you in the days following. You thought that at any moment she’d confront you about what you said to him, but it never came. As the week carried on, you found yourself forgetting the harsh words spoken outside the bar and the worry stopped.

Until Thursday night.

The knock at your apartment door was unexpected. You met your roommate, Mara’s, narrowed eyes over the dirty dishes you were working on. By the look on both your faces, neither one of you had a guest on the way over. She turned on her heel to check the peephole and the next look she gave you was equally as confusing as the previous one. She still opened the door.

“Does YN live here?”

The voice sent shockwaves through your veins and you stopped your movements, plates held just above your head as you were about to slide them into the cabinet. Nate MacKinnon was at your apartment. Mara nodded at him slowly before stepping back to let him in.

“Hi,” he greeted. His hands were tucked into his sweatshirt pocket, legs clad in compression leggings and a pair of shorts. He looked like he’d just come from a workout and his hair was still wet from the shower he’d taken before coming over. “I hope you don’t mind. Gabe gave me your address.”

“No problem,” you told him through a shaky breath. “Come in. Come sit at the island.”

He removed his shoes and approached slowly, sending Mara one last smile as she crept off down the hall. You silently cursed her for leaving you with your shaking hands as you cleared the clutter from the countertop. You watched him as he settled into the stool across from you, mirroring the kind smile he was sharing with you.

“Can I get you anything? Water? Coffee? I have food, too, if you’re hungry.”

“Don’t worry about me,” he said. His voice was softer now than it had been before. “I wanted to talk to you about the other night. It won’t take long.”

“Oh?” you asked, trying to ignore the way your stomach dropped. You wanted to start apologizing right then. You didn’t have a reason to go and butt into his personal life like you had. You should’ve kept your mouth shut. Guys like him didn’t care about your opinions. “I’m sorry for what I said. When I get drunk, I have the tendency to shoot off at the mouth.”

“Don’t apologize,” he said. Your mouth snapped shut. “No one keeps me in check. All the guys think the fact that I can’t keep a girlfriend is a big joke because I’m so bad at dating. It shouldn’t be a joke. So, I’m sorry and thank you.”

You dropped your hands to the counter and leaned against it. The last thing you expected was for Nate to thank you, so you needed a moment to gather your thoughts. His eyes glistened as he watched you and then the corner of his lip quirked up because you started giggling.

“You should not be thanking me,” you said. With that simple statement, the tension in the air lifted. You turned your back on him, indicating that if the conversation must go on, you were going to be doing the dishes as well. “I was just being bitter the other night.”

“You had every right to be,” he said. “I was gloating.”

“You were kind of gloating,” you mumbled. You hadn’t meant for Nate to hear, and he knew that, but he laughed anyway. You turned to face him with an apologetic smile. “Sorry.”

“Stop apologizing,” he said. He didn’t even know why you were apologizing at that point. It seemed like you’d apologize for taking up space and that made him feel a bit sad. He smiled politely at you anyway, to signal he wasn’t annoyed by the apologies, and it lit up his features in a way you hadn’t noticed the other night. “Anyway, I came here for a reason.”

“Okay.”

“I need you to teach me to be romantic.”

He delivered it tentatively, as though he was afraid of the way you might react. In the split second that followed, your mouth open and closed twice as every possible response came to your mind. He waited patiently.

Finally, “You don’t even know me. How can you be so sure that I’m the right person to teach you this stuff?”

“You’re a girl,” he explained, deadpan. “Girls know romance.” You snorted at how adorably dumb he was. Your hand flew up to cover your mouth in embarrassment and your cheeks burned as he grinned at you, amused by the sound of your laugh. “What do you say?”

---

Mondays were always your least favorite day of the week. Every weekend, your workload piled up and most Mondays you could hardly take a lunch break because you were so busy getting shit done. Whenever you came home from work on Mondays, you were wiped. Mara always made sure to have dinner ready for you when you got in, and the two of you often sat on the couch while eating those nights.

That Monday, you were sure that you’d be in bed before the Bachelor even started. But then Nate showed up unannounced. Mara was in the middle of washing the dishes this time, so you were the one to open the door. He greeted you with a goofy smile and a large electrical wire. Without a word, you stepped to the side and he was kicking off his shoes to enter the living room. Mara caught the roll of your eyes as you followed him.

He was standing beside the television when you entered the room. The wire he’d brought with him was connected to his cellphone while he found a port for the other end. You sat at the corner of sectional and waited, yawns escaping your mouth every minute or so. The day had been long enough already.

Suddenly, the television lit up with his cellphone background on full display. He held it up to show you, a grin present on his face.

“I need your help,” he began. He tapped one of the dating apps on his home screen and immediately you were regretting letting him in. You realized he wasn’t leaving any time soon as he unraveled the cord and plopped down beside you on the couch. Mara entered the room, eyes catching on the beautiful brunette woman on the screen, and then she gave Nate a curious look. “Come on, Mara. Join us.”

An amused smile came to her lips as she sat on the other end of the couch.

“I am not swiping for you,” you grunted, rubbing at your eyes. “I have no interest in judging girls off these apps.”

“Relax, YN,” he said. “I’m not asking you to play matchmaker. Just help me talk to this girl.”

“You need help talking to girls?” Mara asked as she gave him the once over. You laughed out loud while Nate blushed.

“I don’t need help,” he began. He turned his attention back to the television and pulled up the profile of a beautiful brunette woman. “I just don’t want to come on too strong, or douche-y. This girl is perfect and I wanna take her out.”

“Can you two make this quick?” Mara asked. “The Bachelor’s on tonight.”

“And my bed is calling my name.”

Nate peered at you over his shoulder. He smiled at your tired eyes, drooping as you leaned your head on your hand. He leaned back, stopping inches from your face and said, “I’ll make it quick.”

To your surprise, and Mara’s delight, he reached up and ran his hand over your hair before turning back to the television. He gave a rundown about the girl on the television, but his words went in one ear and out the other. Your glazed eyes watched as he typed out messages to her, and you laughed when Mara made fun of the way he was talking. (“Why the fuck are you talking like that? Are you her father?”) Finally, he turned on you.

“Are you gonna help or what, love doctor?”

“Give me the phone,” you said, extending your hand. He plopped it into your palm and watched you type out the message on the television screen. It took you less than a minute to type out a sweet message asking the girl out on a date before you were shoving the phone back into his hand. “You overthink too much.”

“That’s it?”

“Short and sweet,” you noted with a shrug. “I’d say yes.”

Nate’s eyes cut to you and you felt a chill run down your spine at the intensity behind them. Mara cleared her throat as you diverted your attention from him, shaking the feeling you got from his baby blues. She smiled sweetly at the two of you. “Can I detach your phone from our TV now? It’s almost time for Bach.”

You peeled yourself off the couch and headed to the bathroom to wash your face before changing into sweats and a t-shirt. You returned to the living room to find Nate with his feet up on the coffee table. Mara had tuned the television to ABC and the Bachelor recap was playing. He looked up as you entered and frowned.

“Stay out here a little bit longer,” he proposed, bottom lip jutting out in a pout. “We’ll watch some of this and see if she says yes to the date.”

“Nate, I’m exhausted.”

“C’mon.”

You couldn’t say no, not when he was pouting like that. So, you rolled your eyes and walked around the couch to plop down in the spot you’d been before. Before long, your eyes were closing and you couldn’t keep them open any longer.

Nate didn’t realize you fell asleep, but he didn’t mind when you leaned against his arm as a pillow. He stiffened for a moment, unsure of what to do, but a soft snore escaped your lips and he found himself smiling down at your peaceful face. He didn’t move for the rest of the episode because he was too nervous to wake you. When the credits began to roll, he dropped a hand to your knee and shook you lightly.

Your eyes opened, bleary from sleep, and you found that you’d fallen asleep on him. You jerked away, realizing that it was probably too close for comfort, and smiled apologetically. He returned the smile before standing and gathering his things from the coffee table.

“Get some sleep,” he said on his way to the front door. You hummed in response, following him to the door to say a proper goodbye and lock up. He pulled you into a hug before going, shocking you once again by with how gentle he was despite hardly knowing you.

“Did she say yes?” you asked as he pulled away from the hug. “I almost forgot to ask.”

“Yeah, she did.”

---

Lesson #1: The First Date

In the chaos of the week that followed, you’d almost forgotten that you promised Nate your assistance before the date. You weren’t used to being accountable for someone else like you were now, so it wasn’t surprising.

“There is a man at reception asking for you.”

The office receptionist, Debby, was standing in the doorway with a giddy smile on her lips. You knew immediately from the look in her eye that the man at the front desk was going to be the talk of the office for a week.

You stood, following her out the door of your office and down the hall. As you rounded the corner to reception, you saw Nate leaning against the desk. He was sucking on a mint from the bowl in front of him and smiled wide when he saw you.

“What are you doing here?”

“I have my date tonight, remember?” he asked. One glance at your watch told you that you worked a little too late. You cursed under your breath, turning quickly to head back to the office and send one last email. Nate hesitated, but ultimately decided to follow you down the hallway. He eyed the pencil skirt you were wearing, eyes lingering a little too long on your ass. He shook his head from his trance, knowing damn well that he was just asking for trouble.

Nate lingered in the doorway of your office for a moment before his eyes landed on a picture frame across the room that caught his attention. It was a marble frame without a photo like it had been removed and never replaced. He picked the frame up and turned it over in his hands, then turned to you.

“You need a picture.”

“What?” you asked, eyes still trained on the screen. They flickered up to see what he was talking about and then got right back to work. “Used to be a picture of me and my ex. Nobody’s important enough to put in.”

Nate placed the frame down. He felt a pang of sadness for you in that moment, but distracted himself by moving onto the next shelf and playing with some of the desk games on it. He was in the middle of fiddling with your Rubiks cube when you stood from the computer.

“You’re wearing that?” you asked. Nate winced at the question, glancing down at the jeans and t-shirt he was wearing. When he looked back up, you were wearing a shit eating grin. “I’m fucking with you.”

“Jesus, YN.” He clutched his heart and released a deep breath. You rounded the desk and grabbed your jacket from the hook. As you swung it over your shoulders, Nate stepped up to help. You slipped your arms through the arm holes trying to suppress the flair up of butterflies in your stomach.

When you reached the sidewalk outside the building, you led him down the block to a florist. Their window displays were your favorite in the city and you often found yourself going out of the way to peak at them on shitty days. You daydreamed about the day someone bought you a bouquet from there specifically.

The bell above the door rang as you stepped in. The smell of fresh flowers hit your nose and you sniffed it in happily. You grinned back at Nate and he felt a tug at his heart at your excitement.

“Can I help you?”

You bounded over to the woman behind the counter, Nate following behind you a little awkwardly. You gave him an expectant look and then his brain finally caught up with the question. As he leaned forward to look at the flowers in the case in front of you, his hand pressed against the small of your back.

“What would you get?” he asked curiously. You took a sharp intake of breath at the lack of space between you and pulled away to look at the flowers.

“Sunflowers and baby’s breath are my favorites.”

Nate smiled at the woman behind the counter and repeated what you’d just said, adding, “It’s for a first date, so I don’t need it too big or anything.”

You laughed at his explanation, and then the blush that come to his cheeks when he realized how silly he sounded. Neither of you noticed the confused look on the florist’s face. She was about to comment on how cute the two of you were, and in hindsight she was glad she kept her mouth shut. He reached out and squeezed your arm as a warning to stop teasing him. You stepped away completely, still smiling stupidly as he turned to pay.

“I’d’ve put roses in there too,” you told him once you were back on the sidewalk. “But this is only a first date. It might’ve been a little intense.”

“Roses?” he asked. You hummed in response, plucking the flowers out of his hand as you continued in the direction of the restaurant he was meeting his date at. “Good to know, you know, for the future.”

The walk to the date spot was only about ten minutes long and most of it was spent talking about your plans for the weekend as opposed to his date. He was going to be away with the team and you had plans to visit family. You kept thinking to yourself that you needed to stop getting distracted by him and his good looks and his sweet disposition. He was dating someone, and that person was not and would not be you, but he kept surprising you with the way he weaseled himself into your life.

“We’ll have to hang out next week sometime, then,” he said, snatching the flowers back out of your hand playfully. You nodded, but you were taken by surprise. It didn’t make sense that he’d want to hang around you without getting something out of it, whether it was dating advice or something more. Clearly, Nate didn’t care and you were beginning to wonder if maybe you’d get a beautiful friendship out of this nonsense.

“Any last-minute advice?”

“Don’t say anything dumb,” you said to him, emboldened by the realization that you might actually be friends now. Nate laughed out loud. “You think I’m just being funny, but sometimes you say stupid shit.”

“Jeeze,” he muttered. “Way to fuck up my self-esteem right before a date.”

“Oh, please.” You rolled your eyes and came to a stop just before the crosswalk he’d be using. He slowed to a stop as well, the bouquet of flowers falling to his side as he looked down at you. You reached out to right them with an amused smile. “Careful with these.”

“Got it, boss.”

You stalled a moment more, gazing at the flowers. You almost felt jealous of the girl going to dinner with Nate because those flowers would look perfect in a vase on your dining room table. “God, I really hope she appreciates those.”

The tone of your voice took Nate by surprise. It sounded a little sad, and full of yearning, and he felt kind of bad that he’d be walking away with the flowers you’d been admiring the entire walk from the florist. Even so, you said your goodbyes and he watched you turn on your heel to head home. He felt stuck in place, eyes trained on your retreating frame while his feet were cemented to the sidewalk. Before he could second guess himself, and his motives, he called out your name.

“Wait, YN!” When you turned, he was halfway down the sidewalk to you and, once he was within arm’s length, he plucked a sunflower from the bouquet and extended it. “For you.” Your cheeks felt red hot as your fingers curled around the stem. You hoped he couldn’t notice a blush. If he did, he didn’t make it known and left with a simple, “I’ll talk to you later.”

A stupid smile sat on your lips the entire way home. You felt the thumping of your heart long after you’d entered your place and placed the flower in the dining table vase. No matter what you found yourself doing that night, Nate remained at the back of your mind. You swore to yourself that it was because you wondered how his date was going, nothing more. But, when your eyes kept finding their way to the sunflower on the dining room table, you worried that maybe the reason you couldn’t stop thinking about him was something more.

---

You grabbed dinner with Mel the next Tuesday. Because of your trip to visit family, the two of you agreed to take a week off and reschedule some sort of get together for Tuesday. Gabe was home so he’d be with Linnea, and you were just happy that it wasn’t Monday. She was in the middle of a story when your phone lit up beside you; Nate’s name was on full display.

When’s our next lesson?

You snatched the phone off the table and away from Mel’s prying eyes, hoping that it wouldn’t peak her curiosity. The movement itself was enough to stir her, though, and Mel was soon leaning forward to see what was going on. She reached out and pushed the phone down, craning her neck to read the text.

“Next lesson?” she asked, eyebrow quirking. “Who is this?”

“It’s Nate MacKinnon.”

You said it so quickly and so nonchalant that Mel actually continued picking at her brunch before she reacted. Her fork clattered to the plate. “Did you just say Nate MacKinnon?”

“This,” you began gesturing at her wild eyes and wicked smile, “is exactly why I didn’t tell you.”

“Why?” she asked, feigning innocence. “Because I’m totally going to take this and run with it?” You dropped your face in your hands. “You should go for it. He’s a little dumb, but mostly cute. You definitely have the patience to deal with him though.”

“Mel, it’s not like that at all,” you told her. “I’m helping him learn how to be more romantic.” Her eyebrows shot up to her hairline in shock. “I’m serious. You know just as well as I do that he’s bad dating. He asked for my help after we met. I have enough experience with douchebags to tell him what not to do.”

“You sure do,” Mel agreed. You laughed at her response and an easy smile spread across her face. “Maybe teaching him a thing or two about how to be romantic will remind you of what you deserve.”

You sighed, picking up the coffee in front of you to take a sip. Mel knew better than anyone, besides Mara, how shitty the guys in your life had been. She met your ex last year just before your break up and she hated him from the moment you introduced the two. He never deserved you and her heart broke the longer you spent wasting your time on him. When you finally ended it, she was your biggest supporter.

You left the message unanswered, not wanting to give her anymore ammo in what was sure to be her new mission. When she got up to head to the bathroom before the check came, you opened the message from him. The last conversation was from Saturday night and he was letting you know that the girl he’d gone out with was looking forward to their next date.

What do you need help with now?

Do you know how to cook?

---

Lesson #2: A Homemade Meal

“I can’t believe you don’t know how to cook,” you grunted as soon as Nate pulled his apartment door open on Friday night. The grin on his face was anything but apologetic and you pushed past him with two large grocery bags in hand. You brought them to the kitchen and began unpacking them onto the counter.

“I do know how to cook, by the way,” he said, stepping up beside you to help you remove everything from the bags. You eyed him skeptically. “Mostly just the basic meats and vegetables.”

“You can’t cook a date your pregame meal.”

Nate knew that. He wasn’t that stupid, but he did love saying stupid shit around you. You tended to roll your eyes at him, but your lips always gave away how you really felt about his stupidity. The right side always curled up into a smirk, like you were trying to fight the laughter bubbling in your chest. He loved it when you did that.

“Is this, like, a meal your ex used to make?” he asked after grabbing some spices from the cabinet. You were grateful that his back was turned because the easy smile on your lips disappeared at the reminder of him. You busied yourself with the pot of water on the stove and set it to boil.

“No, my ex never actually made dinner for me,” you answered in a poor attempt to keep your voice steady.

Nate stopped prepping the meat and turned to face you. Questions sat on the tip of his tongue, begging for him to ask, but you wouldn’t look at him. He felt a little bit angry at your confession, though he couldn’t quite place why. Admittedly, he had been that boyfriend before – the one that didn’t cook dinner. Now, he was mad at himself for ever being that guy.

When you didn’t turn to look at him, he dropped the subject. You worked in silence, you busy with the pasta and him with the chicken. As you waited for the food to be ready, you hiked yourself up onto the counter. Nate grabbed a bottle of red wine from the end of the counter and poured glasses for the both of you.

He stood across from you with a dish towel over his shoulder and his own glass of wine in his palm. He asked about work and you filled him in on all the hot office gossip. The smile on his face didn’t fall once as he listened to your stories, and he never tried to change the subject or take over the conversation for himself. After a while, you stopped.

“I’ve been talking forever.”

“Yeah, and I’ve been enjoying it,” he told you. You laughed. “I wish I could be a fly on the wall in your office.”

Feeling a bit bolder, you kicked your foot out and nudged his side. “Maybe I can take you to bring your pet to work day.”

Nate’s jaw dropped, a reaction you weren’t expecting, and you began laughing hysterically at his surprise. He placed his wine glass down beside him and took a step closer, wrapping a hand around your ankle to tug you closer to the edge of the counter. You yelped in surprise.

“Pet?” he asked. You wiggled your foot out of his grasp, giggles falling from your lips as he dropped his hand to his side. The oven started beeping, interrupting whatever moment you were having before it could continue. “Saved by the bell.”

“Looks good, Nate,” you praised as he pulled it out of the oven. “My mouth is watering.”

“Go sit down,” he ordered. “You have to evaluate my presentation and make sure I look good.”

Nate entered shortly after you sat down and placed the plates on either side of the table with a smile. He slipped back out and returned with the wine. There was mischievous glint in his eyes as he topped your glass off and added to his.

“How is it?” he asked, leaning back. A look of cockiness flashed over his features and you felt it in your stomach when you looked at the way his arms were crossed and his biceps filled out the sleeves of his t-shirt. You picked up your utensils and cut into the meal, picking up a bit of each piece before putting it in your mouth.

Nate leaned forward eagerly. He watched your eyes light up when the flavor hit your tongue and he let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. You nodded emphatically as you swallowed your first forkful. He cut into his own meal and the moment he took a bite, he moaned. The meal was so good that conversation was sparse and, by the end, it looked like your plates had been licked clean.

You didn’t stop Nate from filling your glasses again, though you figured you should have. The third glass always lowered your inhibitions.

“How pissed off would you be if I asked you about your ex?”

“Not pissed off,” you answered. You took a sip of the wine, then leaned your cheek in your palm as you spoke. “What do you want to know?”

Nate sat up at this, suddenly realizing that he hadn’t prepared himself with a question because he didn’t think you’d give him the go ahead. He let out a tuft of breath, took a sip from his glass, and thought. Finally, he asked, “Why’d you break up?”

“How long do you have?”

“As long as you need,” he answered. His voice was soft, comforting, and you felt yourself relax into the question.

“Honestly, I didn’t want to break up with him,” you began. “And, if I didn’t have friends like Mel and Mara, I might still be with him. Things have changed now, though. I realize what a crap human being he was but, if I stayed with him, I don’t think I would’ve realized how much better I deserved.”

“Did you fight a lot?”

“Do I seem like the fighting type?” you teased. He shook his head. “He did enough fighting for the both of us. He would yell at me for no reason sometimes, just because he felt like it.”

Nate was angry. His features were contorted in distaste as you told him about your ex. Even though you tried to make light of the situation with a few light-hearted jokes, Nate couldn’t find it within in him to react with laughter. You deserved so much better than what you’d been given.

“When I broke up with him, Mara was there. We packed my things and moved it all out. I was going to leave a note, but he came home from work early and caused a scene. He went out the night after and sent me all these videos and pictures of him out with his friends. They were flipping me off, girls were draped all over him, etcetera. I blocked him the next morning and I haven’t seen him since. That was over a year ago.”

“Fuck,” he muttered, dropping his head in his hands. He felt ashamed. “That’s why you yelled at me.”

“Yep,” you answered. “Emotions got the best of me.”

“I don’t blame you.”

Silence filled the room and you felt vulnerable. You didn’t share the story about your tumultuous relationship often, but with Nate it just slipped out. You grabbed your glass from the table and finished it off.

“I’m not staying for another,” you announced. Nate sat back, his face flashing with an offended expression. As you gathered the plates from the table, you tried to ignore the knots in your stomach that were becoming more and more prevalent when he was around. “Nothing good ever happens after the third glass. But, if I was your real date, I would definitely stay for a fourth and you would probably get to kiss me at the end of the night simply for how good that meal was.”

The words fell from your lips so easily that it shocked you and you hoped that the playful tone of your voice wouldn’t scare him off. You gathered yourself before turning back to look at him. He was still sitting at the table, chair pushed back with one arm over the back of it. The way he was looking at you was lethal, eyes drinking you in as you stood in his kitchen. You couldn’t tell if you were imagining the tension or it was real.

“Thank you for dinner,” you said finally. You grabbed your bag from the counter and pulled it over your shoulder as you headed for the door. Nate stood then to walk you out, pulling the door open as you slipped into your sneakers. “It was delicious.”

“Thank you for teaching me how to cook something actually good,” he said. “Poor girl would’ve been eating chicken and vegetables or pasta if you hadn’t come by.”

“Can’t let that happen, can we?” you asked. “Let me know how dinner goes.”

Nate leaned down, wrapping an arm around your waist to tug you into a warm embrace. You melted into his arms as yours came up and around his neck. For a moment, the two of you just stood there in each other’s arms. You wondered if he could feel the beat of your chest again him. It sped up as his hands flattened against your back, crossing over each other to engulf you completely.

“I’m not that kind of guy,” he said. He leaned his cheek on the top of your head and his chest rumbled beneath your own cheek as he spoke. “You know that, right?”

Your blinked away tears before he couldn’t notice then and nodded in response to his question.

When he pulled back, he leaned in to press a kiss to your cheek and his lips caught the corner of your mouth. An electric shock coursed through your bloodstream and you pulled back quick before offering one last smile and tossing a goodbye over your shoulder.

---

Nate called you the next Friday night with plans for Saturday.

“Mel and Gabe invited a bunch of the guys over and she told me I should see what you were doing tomorrow.” he said. “I feel like I haven’t talked to you much since last week. The guys would love to meet you.”

“Meet me?” you asked. “So, it’ll be more than just the ones I know?”

“A few more,” he answered with a laugh. “They’ll love you, okay? I’ll be at your place to get you at 5:30.”

It was the first time you were going to see him since you made dinner together last Friday. You exchanged a few texts throughout the week, but nothing of substance. You knew his dinner date went well, though you didn’t know to what extent. You found yourself wondering if she stayed for that additional glass of wine after dinner, or if she stayed for the night after.

He showed up to your apartment wearing a white dress shirt, sleeves rolled to his elbows. You welcomed him in while you went back to your room to get your heels on. He gaped at the dress you were wearing as soon as you had your back to him. His eyes wandered over your curves as you bent to grab your heels from the floor in your bedroom. When your dress slid up your thighs, he had to force himself to look away.

You tried to get more details about his dinner date out of him on the way to Mel’s, but he kept quiet. She liked dinner, she stayed for an extra glass of wine, and then she went home at the end of the night. An invisible weight lifted from your shoulders upon hearing she didn’t stay the night and you settled back into his passenger seat.

Nate noticed the way you relaxed into the seat and tore his eyes from the road for just a moment to sneak a peek at you. You were watching the world go by from the window, unaware that he was even looking at you. When he turned his attention back to the road, all he could think about was his sweaty palms and accelerated heartrate. Why did he care so much about what you thought?

Everyone was already at the house when you pulled up. The two of you walked up the driveway, his hand against your lower back much like it had been in the florist. Mel opened the door, lunging to sweep you into her arms and whisk you to the kitchen, her husband and your, well, Nate left behind.

“Thanks for having me, Mel.”

She handed you a drink complete with a salted rim and said, “I’m glad Nate asked if you could come.”

“Nate asked?” you repeated. She affirmed with a nod and ushered you to join the others in the living room while she and Gabe finished dinner.

You swore half the team was there, which meant not one seat was open on their couch. As you passed Nate, he grabbed your hand and sat you on the arm of his chair. He pulled your legs over his lap and began introducing you to the boys you didn’t already know.

You caught Cale’s eyes and felt heat rise to your cheeks. Out of everyone in the room, he was the only one making note of the lack of space between you two. Though you weren’t technically sitting in his lap, it still felt a little inappropriate. Nate’s hand was like fire where it rested against your thigh and you had to remind yourself to stop peeking at the placement.

Nate lied about your invitation to dinner, and for what? He could’ve just invited you himself instead of disguising it as a joint decision between him and Mel. What was he so afraid of that he couldn’t man up and admit he wanted you there? Better yet, why didn’t he ask Gianna?

You somehow ended up seated away from Nate at the dinner table. Cale settled in on one side of you and EJ occupied the other. Across from you sat JT and Tyson, bickering as always. You don’t know how you ended up separated from Nate, but you welcomed it because you needed the breathing room.

The meal was delicious, but Nate couldn’t even enjoy it because you were so far away. He was going to get fucking whiplash because of the way he kept looking back to see who you were talking to or hear what you were laughing at. How did he even end up this far down from you?

On the other hand, he couldn’t stop the smile that kept creeping up to his lips when he saw you with his teammates. They loved you, probably almost as much as he did, and he was proud to have you by his side that night. But then came the harsh reality that you weren’t actually his to show off.

When the party relocated, he made sure to slide up next to you on the way to the couch. EJ’s laughter mocked him, but you didn’t catch on to his teammate’s playful ribbing. With Gabe and Mel’s eyes in the room, he didn’t pull you over his lap and opted to lower his arm over the back of the couch instead. There were just inches between your skin and his but, after having you on his lap earlier, it felt like miles.

Drinking games were played, stories were shared, and you all left the house with full bellies and large smiles. Nate was driving, so he eased up on the drinks after dinner. You, on the other hand, were feeling just as free as you did after three glasses of wine at his place last week, and feeling daring enough to ask him the question that’s been on your mind all night.

“Why did you tell me that Mel asked you to invite me?”

“What are you talking about?”

“When you invited me, you said that Mel told you to,” you explained in a slow voice as if you were breaking the situation down to a child. “But she said that you asked if you could invite me.”

“Why does it matter where the invite actually came from?” he asked. A slight panic was rising in his chest because he didn’t have an answer for you. This wasn’t supposed to come back around to you. “Everybody wanted you here anyway.”

“Why didn’t you ask Gianna?” you asked, stepping down to join him on the path to the driveway. He rolled his eyes at this, and you noted it because though you’d done it to him many times, he’d never done it to you. He began walking, so you followed. “Are you going to answer my question?”

“Because I didn’t want to introduce her to everyone yet,” he answered. “You just fit in with us.”

Nate saw your face fall and decided not to push the conversation any farther. He said something wrong, but he didn’t know what. As far as he thought, he was complimenting you. He was complimenting how easy going you were, how his friends got along with you so easily. You were already a part of the group. It was great.

You continued along to the car in silence, not bothering to argue with him over a dumb comment. He wanted friends, so you were giving him friends, but the touches and the invite to team dinner was something more than friends. You needed distance. And he needed to figure his shit out, fast.

---

Lesson #3: Meeting the Friends

Something changed. When Nate dropped you off that night, he left you with a half-assed hug and a quiet goodbye. You couldn’t catch a wink of sleep that night because something changed. But then, Nate texted you tomorrow and tried to carry on as normal. Things weren’t normal.

And you knew that for sure when Nate didn’t invite you to EJ’s house the next weekend. Mel invited you instead and since you could never say no to Mel, you went. The thought of texting Nate to let him know passed briefly through your head, but the sheer fact that he hadn’t even bothered to talk to you about it in the first place was enough to decide against it.

When you entered EJ’s living room, you knew exactly why he hadn’t asked. Gianna was sitting on his lap, fingers curling through his hair as they talked. Anger rose in you no matter how hard you tried to suppress it. Just last week he said he didn’t want to bring her around and now she was here? Now she was here and he couldn’t even talk to you?

There was an uproar as Nate’s teammates noticed you standing in the doorway and Nate’s eyes cut to you in surprise. You lifted your hand in a pathetic wave before Cale was wrapping his arm around your shoulders and leading you to the kitchen.

“Who’s the girl with Nate?”

“His new girlfriend,” you answered, hoping that you didn’t sound bitter. “I don’t even know if that’s the right title for her, but they’ve been on a few dates.”

Cale let out a soft hum, his tone indecipherable, just as Tyson entered the room.

“What’s the deal with Nate’s new girl?” he asked as soon as he saw it was just you and Cale in the room. When you didn’t answer, he nudged you for an answer.

“What do you mean?” you asked.

“Well, she’s no you.”

---

Nate couldn’t help but ask himself, “What the fuck are you doing?”

As you were pulled into his teammates arms, he watched and couldn’t decide whether he wanted to get up and hug you too or if he just wanted to disappear. When Gianna’s fingers gripped his bicep, he decided he wanted the latter.

That’s when you looked at him, of course, and the smile that was on yours lips faded just a bit. At least, that’s what he thought. You lifted your hand in a wave before Cale was looping his arm around your shoulders and directing you towards the kitchen.

“Who was that?” Gianna asked, fingers curling into the hair at the nape of his neck.

He looked up at her with a simple answer. “One of our friends.”

Gianna kissed him and for the first time since he met you, Nate thought about what it would be like to kiss you instead. He brought her to EJ’s in a pathetic attempt to right the way he was feeling about you, but it only made it worse.

---

“Nate was weird last night,” Mel murmured after Cycle the next morning. You were waiting for her to say something. Since all the guys made comments the night before, you knew Mel was next. “Did you guys fight?”

“Fight? Me and Nate?” you repeated, stalling for time. “We didn’t fight.”

“What did you think of his girlfriend?”

“I actually didn’t get to talk to her,” you answered. You shrugged, giving the illusion that you didn’t care all that much even though you were fuming. After all the help you’d given him, he couldn’t be bothered to introduce you to her? And that wasn’t all. He hardly spoke to you all night, only entertaining conversations with you when someone else was around. You ended up spending most of the night with EJ.

“My sitter just bailed for tomorrow.” She’d been tapping away at her phone for a few minutes, no doubt panicking to Gabe. You watched her a moment longer as you wondered what her plans were for the next day. Then, it occurred to you.

“There’s a game tomorrow, right?” you asked. She nodded, still typing out messages to whoever was on the other end of the phone. “I can watch Linnea tomorrow. Don’t worry about finding a sitter.”

“I couldn’t ask you to do that.” She waved you off absentmindedly and continued talking, “Besides, I thought Nate had a ticket for you or something. Didn’t he ask you to go?”

“Tomorrow?” you said incredulously. “No, absolutely not. Isn’t it like a WAG game? It would make no sense for me to be there.”

“Oh,” she murmured. “I just thought that he told Gabe,” she paused and noticed your set jaw. You were clearly not Nate’s biggest fan at the moment, so she decided to tread carefully. “You know what? Nevermind. I would love it if you could watch Linnea.”

---

As expected, Linnea was an angel the next day. You spent the time lounging in their living room with the game on TV while you played together. She took a bottle in the middle of the game and you brought her to her nursery once she’d been burped to rock her to sleep. But, you couldn’t quite peel yourself from the chair to put her in her crib. She was sleeping so peacefully and for the first time in a while you felt calm, so you stayed with her in your arms long after she’d fallen asleep.

You didn’t know what time it was when Gabe and Mel got home, but you heard their car doors close. You waited for them to happen upon you in the nursery, so you were surprised when it was Nate that knocked at the door.

“Hi,” he whispered, stepping into the room. He studied the decorations as he approached the rocking chair you were sitting in. When he stepped up beside you and admired Linnea, you tried not to look up at him. You knew it wouldn’t help the butterflies in your stomach, but you did it anyway. He was smiling down at the peanut in your arms. “Mel and Gabe are in the kitchen. They saw you on the baby monitor and told me to come get you.”

“Okay, I’ll put her down and meet you in there.”

“I can wait for you,” he said, stepping away. You stood, cradling Linnea to the crib and then craning to put her down in the center. Nate was watching you intently from the doorway with an unreadable expression on his face.

He stepped out into the hallway first, but he wasn’t walking towards the kitchen. He stood, waiting for you to stepped out into the hallway and look at him. You gave him a half-assed smile, still feeling a little hurt that things had been so weird between you two, and he asked, “Are we okay?”

“We’re fine,” you answered. He wasn’t convinced, but you reached up and shoved him lightly to get him to move down the hall. He didn’t budge, hand coming up to grasp yours against his chest. The beating of his heart sat right at your fingertips. “How was your game?”

“It was good,” he answered. “I wish you were there.”

“Well, then, you should’ve asked me to come,” you said, quite boldly. His lips parted, but whether it was to speak or not you wouldn’t know because you were continuing down the hallway without him.

You slipped into the kitchen to find Mel, leaving the men on the couch in the living room. The moment you stepped in, she was turning to greet you with a smile. You hissed, “Are you behind this?”

“I mentioned you were babysitting, his eyes lit up, and Gabe was the one to invite him over.”

“Team effort?”

She feigned an apologetic smile before ushering you out to rejoin the boys. Gabe got the fire going and Mel curled in his chest once he settled back on the couch. You sat on the other end, legs extended towards Nate in the corner. You felt his eyes whenever there was a suspended silence. You knew he was thinking about you, and selfishly you relished in the attention.

“YN, did you know that Nate’s parents were visiting next weekend?” Gabe asked during a lull in conversation. Nate glared at him, but the Swede happily ignored his buddy at the center of the couch. His eyes cut to you.

“I didn’t,” you answered. “But that’ll be fun. I know how much you missed them.”

All he could offer was a stupid ‘yeah’ before Mel swooped in to save the entire group from a very awkward moment.

Nate was going to kill Gabe. He was going to kill Gabe, but first he had to make a decision. He knew exactly what he had to do. It felt like you were a thousand miles away, not only physically but emotionally. Gabe should’ve kept his mouth shut. He was going to have you meet his parents, he just hadn’t gotten the chance to ask. Now, he looked like a dick. You couldn’t even look him in the eye.

“I was going to tell you about my parents,” he said, practically chasing you down the driveway after you ducked out while he was in the bathroom. To his surprise, you stopped walking and waited for him to catch up. “Seriously.”

“It’s getting hard to believe that, Nate,” you said. “I don’t know what’s going on in your head.”

Nate felt his heart sink. He began to rack his brain for a way to salvage the conversation, but it was too late by the time you reached your car. You stopped before opening the door to look up at him.

“You’re thinking too much.”

“I just—I know you’re upset with me,” he began. “I want to make it better. We haven’t really talked since EJ’s, and that’s on me.”

“Were you going to invite me today?” you asked. He gave you a curious look. “To the game. Mel mentioned something about it at Cycle. That you told Gabe you were thinking about giving your ticket to me.”

Nate ran his hand over his face. The Landeskogs had really gotten him into some trouble here, and he wasn’t sure it was accidental.

“You’re the one I wanted at the game,” he admitted. “I wanted to invite you, but I knew how bad it would look if I didn’t ask Gianna.”

“So, you invited her,” you concluded.

“No.”

You looked at him in shock, mouth agape, and asked, “You’d rather no one go than give the ticket to her?”

“Well, when you put it that way,” he grumbled. You threw your arms up in surrender, hoping the words would sink in. “I don’t know, YN.”

“Yes, you do,” you argued. He kept his mouth shut at that, knowing you had enough. You sighed heavily, allowing the conversation to roll off your back. “When are your parents going to be here?”

“Saturday morning.”

“What are you planning to do?”

“They’ll be at my game in the afternoon and then I was getting us a reservation for dinner,” he trailed off only momentarily. “I haven’t made it yet because I was going to invite you, but Gabe beat me to the punch in there.”

“What about Gianna?”

“YN, if I didn’t want her at my game, why would I want her to meet my parents?” he asked. He made it sound like you were asking the stupidest question in the world. But, he wasn’t answering the most important one. Was he breaking up with her? You wanted to ask, but part of you didn’t want the disappointment. He worried while you thought.

“I’m around on Saturday,” you answered. He smiled, and you forced one back. You hated the feeling between you two. The air between you had never been so stuffy and you wanted to clear it. “Anything else you wanna tell me before the Landeskogs do? Is Sid actually your long-distance girlfriend?”

Nate laughed loudly as he stepped away. He answered your question cryptically, “No, nothing to tell you right now. Not yet.”

---

Lesson #4: Meeting the Family

You planned to meet Nate at his apartment before dinner since his parents had gone to the hotel upon arrival. On the way, you picked up a box of pastries from your favorite bakery. You were taught to do little things for important people, and anyone who was important to Nate felt important to you. You tried not to think about the implications of having dinner with his parents, but it was hard to shake the nerves.

“What’s this?” he asked as soon as he opened the door. His finger slid over the logo on the top of the pastry box, eyes catching on the word bakery. When he looked up at you, his eyes were shining. “For me?”

“For your family,” you told him. “Don’t get any ideas.”

“I thought maybe you heard about my break up and you were trying to comfort me,” he said like it wasn’t breaking news. “I’ll put these in the kitchen.”

“You broke up?” you asked, following him to the kitchen. You stopped in the doorway as he put the pastries on the counter. He nodded simply as he cleared some clutter from the countertop. You could see his muscles moving beneath his navy polo. Guiltily, you couldn’t stop yourself from admiring the way the sleeves hugged his biceps or the wide expanse of his back and shoulders. “What happened, Nate?”

“We can talk about it later, alright?”

“Are you single or not?” you asked. Nate caught the frustration in your tone and he’d be lying if it didn’t make him want to kiss you right then. You needed to know what was going on with him, and that made him feel good about whatever was going on between you two.

Nate started to exit the kitchen, but stopped in the doorway beside you. You were crowded against his chest as he smiled down at you and answered, “Yeah, I’m single.”

You released a breath once he stepped out of the doorway. He slipped his shoes on while you stood nearly the front door. He caught the look on your face, a little scrunched up as you spaced out. You were thinking too much, worrying about what happened with him and Gianna. When he walked back over to the front door, he took you by the hips and said, “We can talk about it later, if you want. Right now, I just want to be with you and my family.”

---

“I’m nervous,” you admitted as Nate pulled up to valet outside the restaurant. He looked at you in shock. “Don’t make fun of me.”

“I’m not gonna make fun of you,” he promised. He reached over and dropped his hand to your thigh. You pouted at him, and his first instinct was to lean over the center console and kiss it off your lips. He knew better than to risk it all just before dinner, so he grabbed your hand and dropped a kiss to your palm instead. “You’ll be fine. No need to be nervous.”

A heavy sigh left your lips as he stepped out of the car. He rounded the front and opened the passenger door for you, grabbing your hand as you stepped out. After he handed his key to the valet, he laced his hands in yours and led you into the restaurant.

The MacKinnons were already at the table that had been reserved for them. There was uproar of cheers when they saw Nate walk in. You stole a peek at his face and the pure joy on it set your heart aflame. He dropped your hand as you approached the table to hug his parents and sister. They introduced themselves to you as well, sweeping you up in tight embraces like they had with Nate.

“It’s great to finally meet you,” they spoke as they hugged you.

Nate pulled your chair out from across his mother and then situated himself beside you. The menus were passed out and Nate whispered suggestions in your ear while his family members debated their own meals. She took the time to calm her nervous. Parents loved her, so there was no reason to freak out. Eventually the drinks were handed out, orders were taken, and the chaos at the table stopped.

“Now, how’d you two meet again?” his mom asked. You looked at each other, stupidly, both stammering in response until Nate got his shit together.

“We met through friends,” he answered simply. Then, his lips curled up and he said, “She yelled at me.” You dropped your face into your hands, embarrassed by the picture he was painting of you, but they took it in stride, laughing at your expression. “It wasn’t that bad.”

He continued, “As you guys know, I’ve been very unlucky in my personal life.” Sarah snorted at this. Their mother smacked her knee as a scolding. “I literally suck at being romantic and all the guys were joking around about it after I’d just been broken up with. YN called me out, so I asked her to teach me how to be romantic.”

“Well, what’d you learn?”

“How to cook a meal other than my pregame types, and I also have a new favorite florist,” he said. He reached into his back pocket for his wallet and flipped it open to slip out their business card. You didn’t realize he grabbed one. “There are some other things, like her wine rule.”

“Wine rule?”

“Nothing good ever happens after the third glass of wine,” you explained. They laughed at that, though they seemed bewildered by your reasoning.

Nate elaborated, “It just means that if your date stays for a fourth glass, you’ll probably get lucky.”

This earned him a smack on the arm from both his sister and yourself.

Nate’s family was just as kind as he was and it was clear how much they all adored each other. You fit in seamlessly, at least that’s how it felt, and when they asked the waitress to take a picture of them, Nate tugged you into his side to keep you in the frame.

“Take one without me,” you urged him. He just shook his head, gazing down at the picture on his phone. He passed it off to his parents and sister for approval. “Nate.”

“I want you in the picture,” he whispered to you. His hand came up to the back of your neck and he pulled you in to place a chaste kiss to your temple. He pulled away, like kissing you in public and on the forehead was normal now, and asked, “How was your food?”

When you got back to his place after dinner, you presented his mother with the pastries and earned a hug and kiss on the cheek as a thank you. They settled into the kitchen as he made drinks, chatting as a family about the people back home and his life in Denver. You slipped out to go to the bathroom, and give them some alone time.

“I like her,” you overheard his mother say as soon as you slipped out of the kitchen. You slowed your steps on your pursuit to the bathroom even though you knew it would be best to keep walking. You couldn’t help but be a little nosy.

“That’s good to hear,” Nate said. You smiled to yourself. “I like her, too.”

---

Nate’s family only stayed for another hour before you were bidding them farewell from his front door. They squeezed you and thanked you for the pastries, and then began inviting you to visit before Nate had to shut it down. Your heart felt full after spending the night with them, but sitting alone in Nate’s apartment in anticipation of what was to come was scaring the shit out of you.

Your hands were a little shaky and your palms were definitely sweaty. There was change coming, change that was already present, and you were both excited and terrified for it. Nate reentered the apartment not long after. When he saw you sitting on the couch, he released a breath he’d been holding.

“Are you going to stay for another glass?” he asked after locking the door behind him. “That one’s only your second.”

You eyed his smile, heart beat stuttering a bit beneath his gaze, and lifted the glass to your lips to finished what was left. You nodded and followed him into the kitchen. While he filled both your glass and his, you picked yourself up onto the counter like you’d done so many times before.

“I did a bad thing,” he murmured after handing your glass back to you. You raised a brow at him as he reached over to one of the cabinets and opened it to reveal two pastries in a Ziploc bag. “I stole two of them from my mom.”

“Nate!” you exclaimed. He chuckled at your exasperation. “I can bring you to that bakery whenever you want! Your parents don’t live here! It was a gift!”

“And they have the other eleven pastries,” he argued. “They’re not going to miss two.”

Reluctantly, but still with a smile, you took a pastry from his hand. You bit into it at the same time, eyes lighting up at the taste. At the sight of each other’s faces, you were doubled over in laughter before you had the chance to swallow what was in your mouth. You looked away from him to regain composure and only looked back when you were sure you wouldn’t choke.

“Those were fucking good.”

“Only the best for your mom.”

“Thank you,” he spoke. “For the pastries and for hanging out with my family today. I’m sure you had other things to do, but it meant a lot. They’ve been hearing a lot about you.”

“I had a lot of fun with them,” you said. His smile was soft, shy even, and he watched you carefully as you sipped from the glass in your hand. “It was nice to meet the people who made you who you are.”

“Wait until you meet Sid.”

You decided to move from the kitchen to the living room in favor of more comfortable seating. He reached his hand out behind his back, and you linked your fingers with his lazily so he could lead you to the couch. You slowed to a stop as he sat down, legs spread to pull you between them. Your hesitation caused a look of confusion to flash over his features.

“Can you tell me what’s going on inside your head now?” you asked, placing your glass down on the table beside the arm of the couch. He followed suit, then placed his hand delicately at your hip to urge you closer.

“Sure, I can,” he answered. He pulled you into his lap. You looped her arms around his shoulders as he flattened one hand against your back and curled the other around your thigh. “I don’t want to waste those romance rules on someone I don’t really like all that much.”

“You really didn’t like her?” you asked meekly. Of fucking course he didn’t like her, you were thinking. You were in his lap, not her, but you still couldn’t wrap your head around it. “Why?”

“The only reason I looked forward to going on dates with her was because I got to spend time with you before,” he confessed. You felt it all through your body. “I broke up with her the morning after we were at Gabe’s together. After you called me out on my bullshit, I knew I was being stupid.”

“Why me, though?”

“Because you deserve the world and I want to be the one to give it to you.”

It was only natural for you to lean in and capture his lips with yours. After all this time spent waiting and beating around the bush, you didn’t want to wait a second more. It was passionate, and new, and exciting. His hands held you close while your fingers curled into the back of his hair, but he wasn’t close enough.  

You swung your leg over to straddle him, not caring that you were wearing a dress with just panties underneath. His hands flew to your hips as you grinded against him. You gasped against his lips at the friction as he held you tighter, teeth nipping at your bottom lip until you covered his mouth with yours again. He guided your hips to grind against him once more, but you braced your hands against his chest to push away.

“I’m not staying for a fourth glass,” you said breathlessly. He smiled up at you, eyes falling to your lips that were red and plump from kissing him. Kissing him! He leaned in, tongue swiping along his bottom lip, and pulled you down by the back of the neck.

He murmured through his kisses, “You didn’t even finish your third.”

At the challenge in his voice, you reached over for the glass on the side table and finished what was left. He held you close, laughing against the crook of your neck. You giggled along with him until you felt his lips against your skin again and a gasp fell from your lips.

“You gotta leave before I pour number four,” he warned, breath ghosting over your neck. He kissed your neck again, this time sucking lightly enough to earn a strangled moan. You pushed back against his chest and stood, flustered as you adjusted your dress and your hair. Nate couldn’t help but smile as he watched you cross the room for your purse. He grabbed a pillow and held it over his lap to hide his hard-on.

“What are you doing tomorrow?” he asked as you put your heels on the end of the couch. He was admiring your flushed cheeks and your wild hair as you busied yourself. You fastened the strap on each heel before looking back at him. It took everything in you to not go back over there and unbutton the rest of his shirt.

“Nothing,” you answered as you stood. He followed suit, adjusting his dress pants just a bit so he was comfortable and making you giggle in the process. He stepped up beside you and pulled you against him again. He placed one, two, three kisses against your neck then your jaw then your lips.

“Let me make you dinner.”

---

Nate wasn’t going to be able to keep his hands to himself. He knew that the second you walked out of your room in that little black dress, but he was really trying to be on his best behavior. It was technically only your first date and he wanted to impress you. You just weren’t helping very much. As soon as you were in his car, you were grabbing his hand and lacing it with yours to drop them into your lap.

He was a little nervous that he wasn’t going to be able to pull this off. He was sure that he’d fuck up somewhere and you’d go running. And, truthfully, you could tell that he was overthinking every little thing he did. The tension in his shoulders as he moved about the kitchen to prepare everything for dinner was clear.

“What’s wrong with you?” you asked.

He gave you the most pathetic shrug and shake of the head as he tried to wave off your concern with a soft, “Nothing.”

“That’s a lie,” you called him out. “You look stressed.”

“I mean, I am a little stressed,” he admitted, diverting his eyes from yours as he headed over to the fridge. “I don’t want to fuck this up.”

Before he knew it, you were standing between him and the refrigerator. You flattened your hands against his chest and slid them up until your hands were linked behind his neck. A slight tug on him was enough to get him to kiss you. He finally relaxed, arms dropping from the refrigerator door to grip your hips.

“You’re not going to fuck this up.”

“I don’t have a very good track record.”

“You do with me,” you said softly. He looked skeptical, not quite understanding what you meant, so you pressed against him as his arms enveloped you. “You gave me a sunflower the third time we were ever around each other. You’ve cooked me dinner already. Sure, it was under different circumstances, but it counts. Nate, you know exactly what you’re doing. Don’t overthink it.”

“Go sit,” he said, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. You managed to calm his nerves better than anyone he’d ever known in a matter of seconds. “I’ll plate dinner and then I have to grab something for you, okay?”

Nate entered the dining room a minute later, placing both plates down across from each other before disappearing to grab wine glasses and another bottle of wine. Then, he was off down the hall to his bedroom. Your eyes followed him curiously, wondering what else he could possibly have up his sleeve. He’d already impressed you enough by cooking a meal you didn’t teach him.

“Oh, wow,” you breathed out when he appeared in the hallway with a bouquet of flowers. “Nate.”

“For you.”

You stood to take them from his hands and kiss him in thanks. When you pulled away, your fingers danced along the petals of the roses tucked between the sunflowers and baby’s breath Nate had grown to love too.

---

You filled your glass for a fourth time as inconspicuously as possible after your last bite of dinner, but Nate caught your eye over the bottle as you poured and you knew he knew what you were doing. He tried to stifle his smile unsuccessfully, picking up his own glass to cover it. One sip and his third glass was done.

“More?” you asked, extending the bottle in his direction.

“Four glasses?” he teased. “What do you take me for?”

“Okay, more for me then.”

Your voice was low, eyes dark as they settled on him, and suddenly he was lunging forward to grab the bottle and pour another glass for himself. Your giggles filled the room. He wanted them to echo off his walls forever.

“I want to take a picture with you,” he said. You gave him a curious look, though your stomach was doing cartwheels at the suggestion. “I keep thinking about your empty picture frame and I want you to have something to put in it.”

“We can take a selfie,” you suggested. He was quick to shake his head, pushing away from the table to take your hand and lead you to the patio. He pulled the phone from his back pocket and set it up against the couch. He removed the glass from your hand to place it out of view of the camera.

“Now, this is quite the set up,” you murmured as he moved furniture out of the way so there was ample space to take the photo. Denver’s city lights were sure to be the perfect backdrop and having Nate beside you wasn’t too bad either.

“Well, it has to be perfect if it’s going in your office.”

“How do you know I’ll even want to put it in the frame?” you asked. Nate pressed the timer and turned to walk back at you, smirk on his lips. You were teasing him, but you were playing innocent with those doe eyes. He curled around you, arms pulling your back against his chest to pose for the picture.

“After tonight, I’m sure you will,” he murmured in your ear. “Smile.”

The audacity of a man who tells you to smile after igniting your entire body in goosebumps.

The camera went off in a sequence, five pictures for the one timer. You smiled twice before he reached up to turn your face to his for a kiss. The sound of the shutter had you pulling away from his lips with a giggle. He smiled down at you for the next photo as laughter spilled from your lips, and then he was kissing you again.

When you finally pulled away from him, all giggly and handsy, Nate dragged you along with him to his phone. He curled around you as he flipped through the photos, each one cuter than the one before.

“Are you saying you wouldn’t put that in your office?” he asked. His breath tickled the back of your neck. You were just trying to tease him before, but with the lack of space between you and the way he was looking at you in these photos, you just couldn’t tease him anymore. His fingers trailed up your arms, goosebumps rising in their wake once again.

“How’s that fourth glass of wine treating you?” you asked. Nate tucked the phone in his back pocket as you turned to face him. His hands were on you once they were free, curling over the curve of your ass.

“I shouldn’t have let you talk me into it,” he murmured against your lips. “I’m trying to be good, but it’s impossible to keep my hands to myself.”

“What if I don’t want you to keep your hands to yourself?” you against, arching your body to press against him. You could feel him hard against your hip and knew you had him exactly where you wanted him. You pressed your lips to his and, as you pulled away, you took his bottom lip between your teeth and sucked on it.

A growl ripped through his chest as he lifted you into his arms. Your legs came to wrap around his waist as he carried you into the apartment and slammed the patio door shut behind him. He dropped you onto the bed, one hand coming to tug you towards the end by the ankle. His hands spread your legs so he could step between them and they slid up your thigh, pushing your dress up as they went.

“You don’t know how badly I’ve wanted to do this,” he murmured in your ear as his hands reached your hip, dress bunching around his wrists and revealing your lace panties to him. “Stealing touches in a crowded room just doesn’t compare.”

You lifted your arms as he guided the dress over your body and tossed it to the floor. At the sight of your match set, Nate pushed you up the bed and crawled over you. He peppered kisses along your skin from your collarbone to your chest. He worked his way down your stomach until reaching the top of your underwear. In on swift movement, your thong was on the floor and he was spreading your legs.

“So pretty,” he murmured, fingers spreading your folds. You moaned out as he slipped his finger in. “You like my fingers in your pussy, baby?” You could only manage to nod because he’d already slipped a second finger in. He curled them while he pressed a kiss against your inner thigh. “How about my tongue?”

Nate licked a stripe up your center and you gasped, hands flying down to curl into his hair as he continued to eat you out. He sucked on your pussy, continuing to thrust his fingers into and curl. He dragged moans out of you, obscene words dripped from your lips, and the filthy sound of his tongue filled the room.

“You taste so good.”

You tried to grind against face for some more friction, but he held your hips down and continued. You whined, tugging his hair and arching your back as he brought you to orgasm.

“Nate, I’m gonna cu—” you moaned, toes curling at the feet of his lips around you. Suddenly, cool air shocked your core and your orgasm retreated. You sighed as your whole body sank into the bed at the absence of stimulation. Nate crawled up your buddy, licking a stripe up your neck before attaching his lips to yours.

“Sorry, baby,” he said. He nudged your knees apart and situated himself between them, hand falling to his dick as he lined it up with your entrance. “I just need you to cum on my cock.” You moaned as he pushed his head between your folds. “YN, as long as you’re mine, I’ll never make you feel like you don’t deserve all the most romantic things.”

You answered with a moan as he bottomed out inside you. He watched your face as you adjusted to his size and smiled as you whimpered, pulling your teeth between your lips. You felt so good around him and as he began to pull out and thrust in again, your nails dug into his biceps.

You knew he was trying to take his time, but you could hardly take it. As far as you were concerned, Nate would have all the time in the world to take it slow with you. Tonight was not that night.

“Fuck me harder.”

When you sounded like that beneath him, how could he say no? His previously slow and calculated thrusts became sloppy at your request. He relished in the sound of your moaning and the way you called his name like a prayer. You were unraveling beneath him and he wanted to get you there. He adjusted your leg over his shoulder so he could hit a new angle.

“Come on, baby,” he moaned against your lips. “I wanna see you cum for me.”

He reached down and placed his thumb against your clit, rubbing in circles as he pumped into you. You screamed out and your body arched as your orgasm ripped through you. Nate pumped into you a few moments more as he chased his high while listening to your whimpers. He spilled out into his condom as a string of curses left his lips, then collapsed onto of you to catch his breath.

Your fingers immediately found his hair as your breathing evened out together. His body was hot on yours and a sheen of sweat covered both of you. Nate’s fingers curled around your waist and into your skin, squeezing you like he needed to get closer but couldn’t. Finally, he pulled out of you and sat back on his knees.

“You’re so beautiful,” he sighed, hands rubbing up your stomach to cup your breasts. You shivered at his touch. “I never want to leave this bed.”

“Not even for shower sex?”

“Okay, maybe for shower sex,” he murmured. He picked you up, tossing you over his shoulder to carry you to the bathroom.

---

A few hours (and orgasms later), you were clothed in Nate’s sweats and t-shirt and waiting for him beneath the covers in bed. He was cleaning up the glasses you left on the patio and running the dishwasher, though he was quick to finish it up and return to you. You looked so cute propped up against the headboard that he couldn’t stop smiling as he got ready for bed. He pulled on a pair of sweats, but remained topless as he slid under the covers. Instead of pulling you down to rest on his chest, he dropped his head onto your stomach and pulled you tightly to him. Your fingers carded through his hair.

“Thank you for tonight, Nate,” you spoke. “This was the best first date I’ve ever been on.”

“I’m counting this as our fourth date,” he responded. You laughed at him, slapping his bicep lightly at his teasing. “Let’s be honest, I was trying to impress you this entire time anyway.”

“Consider me impressed.”

Nate pulled you down to eye level with him, heads on your respective pillows, and then turned to shut the lamp off beside him. When he turned back, he pulled you against his chest. With your ear to his chest, you listened to his heartbeat and his breathing as it evened out. His fingers scratched your back ever-so-slightly as if soothing you to sleep.

“Are you happy?” he asked. You looked up at him with a curious gaze. Could he not tell how happy you were?

“Of course, I am,” you answered. “Are you?”

“How could I not be?” he asked. “You’re so far out of my league.”

“No, I’m not,” you groaned. You covered your blushing face with your hands at his words, hoping that he couldn’t feel the beat of your heart. Nate was quick to tug them down, holding them against his own chest. He didn’t care if you felt how hard his heart was beating. In fact, he wanted you to know. He wanted you to know the effect you had on him.

“You feel my heart, right?” he asked. You nodded. “You did that. You do that to me every single time I’m around you.” Your eyes began to water and you tried to pull your hand away from his to wipe the water pooling in the corner. Nate grabbed both your hands with one of his and wiped it with his own thumb. “I’ll never let you go to bed thinking I don’t love you. I’m going to shower you with flowers from our favorite florist and buy you pastries from that little shop you like, and I’ll never make you feel like you need to stifle yourself and who you are on account of me.”

“Nate.”

“Just listen to me, alright?” he asked, voice soft. You nodded. “Your ex stuffed you down and he didn’t appreciate you. That’ll never happen with me, and if you feel like it is, you need to tell me, just like you did when we first met.”

You tried to stammer through some type of coherent response, but words failed, so you kissed him. His arms wrapped around your waist to pull you flush against him and your legs intertwined. He was intoxicating, you couldn’t get enough, but he felt just the same. He wondered how anyone had let you go before and simultaneously thanked them for the gift that was you.

That night, Nate vowed he’d never let you go to bed unhappy and he’d never let you feel any less than perfect. He waited forever for a partner like you, honest and kind, and he finally had it in his hands, in his bed. And you promised that you’d never love anyone as much as you loved him. You just knew it.

[bjornswoman]

Feelings

Requested by none.

Author's note: Hey guys! Thank you so much for your support. Thank you so much for everything. I reached 128 followers and I am so happy about this. Well, I am happy about all everything. Thanks for everything guys!!

Pairing: Ivar x Reader.

Genre: Smut, romance, angst, a little drama.

Summary: You and Ivar finally talk about your feelings.

Warnings: Smut, unprotected sex, a little bit jealousy.

You were walking around Great Hall greeting people just to avoid your husband. Ivar and you was fighting each timeyou were near each other, so tonight, not wanting to destroy the feast, you were trying to stay away from him and away from fighting with him. His paranoid jealousy and paranoid mind played mischievous tricks to him. Sometimes his jealousy wasn't the reason you fought, but his anger, caused from other people around him. You couldn't fight him anymore, but you couldn't leave him too. Maybe he didn't love you the way you did and just married you because of the alliance he seeked with your father, but you didn't mind. You just wanted this fights between you to stop.

Everyone in Kattegat knew that something was wrong between Ivar and you. They could see that. They could hear that. Thralls talked with each other and gossiped about their masters. You had listened them doing that, but you didn't care about that. You cared only about your marriage, because you knew from the first moment after your wedding with Ivar, that you were his wife and his queen, nothing else.

Ivar's eyes burned you body. His gaze followed every single move you did. He was sitting on his throne drinking ale from his cup. You turned your eyes to face him, he was angry, you could see that on his blue eyes. You took a deep breath and started walking towards him. Before you seat on your seat near his, you glanced at him one more time. This time he wasn't looking at you, he was looking a thrall. A girl. You knew her. Her name was Freydis. She was a blonde beautiful woman. She was looking to your husband too, smiling at him. She had seen you but she didn't care about you. Who did, after all? They were afraid of Ivar, not you.

You knew that Ivar was going to lay with another woman. It was in men nature to do so. Every man did that, even your own father. You had seen him some time laying with a thrall in a barn since then you knew that men did that all the time. Some of them even divorced their wives to be with their mistresses, but they were too few. Most of them stayed married with their wives. Some of them even loved them too much, but cheating was in their nature, they couldn't change the way they were. Of course, there were men who loved and respected their women. Men who laid only with their wives, but they weren't many.

You wantes to say something to him, to get a word out of his mouth. Just a word, that wasn't about to start a fight between you. A proper word. You had exchanged not many of them since you got married.

That man was enraged almost all the time, but you couldn't blame him for this. The world wasn't nice to him in the first place. They made him who he was and they dared to blame him for that. They called him monster, cripple and other names like that. They weren't suitable to him, because inside these huge walls, you spotted a soft side of Ivar. You saw that the first night you slent together. He was gentle with you and he did everything he could to make you feel good.

"If you want, I can arrange you to meet with Freydis. She's beautiful and sweet girl as you can see." You spoke softly to him, looking at Freydis and then to him. He turned to you frowned. He was confused by that. He had never given to you any reason to think for him like that. He was a lot of things but not a cheater. He treated well and respected all women, like he respected his mother. Your thought about him was so wrong and that eneraged him. You could see his anger burning him, burning his blue eyes. You did said that for good, but it was the worst thing to say.

He dropped his cup on the ground. All the people turned to look at you, you closed your eyes and then you opened them again. He was furious.

"Out all of you!" He yelled to the people inside there and they run outside that Hall. He turned his back to you and run his hand through his hair and closed his own eyes. You stood up from your seat and tried to reach him, but, suddenly, he turned to face you and you stopped there. He was about to yell, you know that, because every time he was about to yell he did that. He run his hand though his dark hear, closed his eyes and then he yelled. By doing the first things he tried to calm himself but he failed every single time. "Why did you say such a thing, woman? Have I ever done something like that? I am a cripple, a madman, a cruel man. I am a lot of things, but I know how to treat a woman. I treat you, like I did to my mother. I am trying to be a good husband. I am not a cheater. I am not that (Y/N). Maybe you didn't choose to marry me, but I chose to marry you. This, our marriage, wasn't just for a stupid alliance with your father. I wanted you to be my wife (Y/N), I saw something in you, something that attracted me to you. Something that made me want to take you. This alliance was just an excuse to to take you as mine." He spoke in harsh tone of voice. You didn't know what to think after that, what to say. You were shocked. The only think that you thought you were for Ivar was just a forced marriage, a wife he didn't want but took for an alliance. You were about to cry out of anger. You were angry not with him, but with yourself, just yourself who thought so wrong about him because you met before some idiots.

"I am so sorry, my king. I should never have thought like that, or said it. Forgive me." You muttered and turned your eyes to the ground. That made him angrier than before, if that was even possible. He turned his back on you again and you closed your eyes. All you said was stupid things, that annoyed him.

"I think you don't understand what I am saying to you, or you don't listen to me when I am talking. I just told you that I chose to marry you, because I feel things about you. I think I love you, (Y/N) and you ask me to forgive you because you implied that I want to sleep with that slave, that I don't even know her, because I looked at her one. To be honest with you, I don't care for that woman. I don't care for any other woman, I only care for you. I am trying hard to understand you, but you do it even harder for me to reach you." He said again and you looked at him. He didn't look angry anymore, just confused, but you were confused too. He was too complicated for you to understand him, but you weren't easy to be understood too.

"I thought that you didn't want me to bother you. I.... I love you Ivar. I understood that after the first night we spent together after our wedding. You are a good man but I didn't think you want me. I thought I was just a woman you didn't want. I had never thought that you were the one you chose me, but I am glad to know. I am glad to hear that you even love me. I said those things about you and Freydis because I know that it's on men nature to want to lay with another women that aren't their wives." You said. He reached you and his hand touched your shoulder and then you cheek. You leaned on his touch and he let a little smile form on his face. He caressed your cheek softly and you smiled. "You are not like the others you are special, I was an idiot and didn't understand that earlier. You soul is rare. There is no men like you, Ivar." You whispered to him and he smiled widely. He leaned more to you and he pressed his lips on your softly. His kiss was a slow one and it was a way to show your feelings to each other. You would start something new and you would let all this fights in the past.

When you pulled away, you looked at him. He looked as happy as you were. He wrapped his hand around your waist and pulled your body closer to his. Your bodies touched each other. His body has hot, so hot. Your body shivered at how close he was to you. He leaned closer to you.

"Now that we talked about our feelings, woman, I have a request. I want children. I want a lot of children. I want Ivarssons and Ivarsdottirs." He whispered to you and you smiled.

You loved children. You helped poor families that had children who couldn't provide them food and clothing before. You loved all your children and wanted to have your own.

"I want that too." You whispered back and he didn't lose any time. He lifted you up to him and you wrapped your legs around his torso tightly. He led you to your room and started kissing your neck hungrily. You tried not to moan but he did his best for you to fail and you did failed.

"Good woman." He whispered to you and ripped that red dress off your body. You looked at the pieces of it, as he removed his own clothes. That was a beautiful dress. You thought Ivar liked it too. Well, he did liked it. Actually, he loved it, but he wanted to be the only one who could see you wearing this. No other man could see you wear this. He looked at the pieces and smirked. His hands touched your waist and pulled you closer. You looked at his eyes and he did the same.

"You are not allowed to wear things like that infront of another men. I am jealous." He spoke like he was a child, talking to its mother about something he didn't like. You smiled to him and caressed his soft cheek. "You can have as many red dresses you want, I love red, but you can wear them only for me." He said again and kissed your lips hungrily. He was impatient. He wanted you more than anything and he needed you that moment. His hands travelled to all the parts of your body and he caressed them softly. You moaned when he squeezed you.

"Good because I have some dresses that you need to see." You spoke when you pulled away. He was so inpatient that he pushed you down to bed and came on top of your body. He was leaving hungrily kisses to your neck.

"Not now, my love." He said and he continued what he was doing to you. His right hand reached your knee and he started run slowly his hand up your thigh and your wet entrance. You shivered under him. You liked his touch so much. You gasped when he entered his finger inside you. His finger circled around your clit and you moaned his name loudly. Your eyes were closed and your hands gripped the furs of your bed tightly. Your grip was so tight that your hands hurt. He looked at you smiled. He liked hearing your little moans and seeing that sexy expression on your face.

He took his finger off of you and you opened your eyes and were ready to complain about it.

"Easy woman. I am just going to give you all of me. If you don't want me and want just my finger on you, I-" You stopped his words by pulling his body. He laughed and took his position between you legs. He thrusted in you hard and you screamed his name under him.

"Oh gods!" You screamed again and he laughed. When he heard you screaming like that under his body, he didn't feel insecure, he didn't feel like he was a cripple anymore.

Cripple.

That word wasn't suitable for him. Yes, he had that deformity, but the word cripple wasn't good. This word had been haunting him since he was a child and after that. When he tried to lay with Margrethe and he couldn't finish. He felt useless. He thought himself an abomination, but now, on top of you, having you, was the best thing. He felt like all of his stress had gone and he was happy that he gave to you such a pleasure.

You continued to scream and he thrusted deeper in you each time. He was growling sometimes, or let other animalistic sounds. You couldn't last any longer. You needed to free yourself. You tightened around him and he groaned.

"Ivar!" You scream as loud as you could, as you released yourself around him. That view drove him crazy, he lost his mind seeing you like this. That led him to his release too.

"Fuck!" He groaned and then he let himself free inside you. You gasped when you felt his hot seed spilled inside you, running down your thigh when he pulled out of you. Your sweaty bodies touched each other as he fell next to you on the bed. "I hope that we will have a child after that." He whispered to you smiling and you smiled back to him. You leaned your body closer to his and he wrapped his hands around your body and covered yoh with the hot furs.

"And if we didn't make it, we would try again." You said and he came even closer, ready to do again what happen just a moment before. You tried to oush him, but his firmly grip around your waist didn't let you. "Not now. I need some rest first, then we can do it as many times as you want." You told him and positioned yourself inside his hug. It was hot inside there.

"Be careful what you wish for, my love." He whispered to your ear and kissed your neck.

Taglist: @youbloodymadgenius

[lubdubsworld]

Better Man. ( Taehyung x Oc)

Rated 18 +

Post Divorce, Getting Back Together, Second chances, Angst. 

Chapter 1

Chapter 2  ~ Its okay to want something to end and also be sad that its ending. 

With infidelity, its never black and white. 

There’s different kinds of infidelity and you can’t ever say which is worse. That depends entirely on the people involved and the values they hold dear. What may be a small indiscretion to someone, may well be an unforgivable act of betrayal to someone else.

 And that’s fine. People aren’t one dimensional. We can’t all have the same perspective. 

So infidelity is also never one dimensional. 

Sometimes its a one night stand. Something done and forgotten. Discarded from the mind like the used condom in the motel room floor. 

Sometimes its a dear friend who betrays you, your best friend who apparently always had a thing for your husband and felt perfectly fine making a move on him. That one stings . Because you lose two people. Two very important people at the same time. 

Sometimes its a coworker, someone who stays by their side majority of the day. Who offers a sympathetic ear when your husband wants to relax.

Sometimes men just fall out of love and are too much of a coward to say it out loud, opting to cheat on you instead. 

Sometimes, they are jealous, of your career, of your kid, or your friends. Too lazy to win your affection they go find satisfaction in some one else’s bed. 

Sometimes it never even gets physical. Sometimes its just someone catfishing your husband or sending him nudes.

And sometimes, its an emotional connection. They actually fall deeply in love with someone else and I think, for most women, that would be the one that would sting the most. 

With Taehyung, it had been a night of drinking. He had had one drink too many, had tumbled into bed with some trainee a decade younger and had broken our marriage vows. 

Not really a very thought out or planned mistake. He hadn’t cheated with the intent to cheat. He had just been too drunk to know better. 

So, why did I leave him?

Because it hadn’t been about the cheating. 

It had been the drinking. 

When we first met, Taehyung couldn’t hold his liquor. Not that it mattered because he didn’t like it all that much. Didn’t mind sipping juice when other’s nursed beers. 

But as he grew older, as he grew more successful, he had started accepting drinks from producers and directors and fellow actors... Because, it was rude not to and Kim Taehyung was nothing if not the personification of politeness. 

 His tolerance hadn’t increased but his drinking had and that was a bad combo. 

:”You need to stop doing this Tae. You can’t just come home black out drunk, every time you have an after party.... You’re going to hurt yourself or god forbid someone else... some day and I’m not going to sit here and wait for you to wreck your entire life over a stupid drink....” 

It was a speech I had made way too many times. The words recycled and reframed, and rearranged to try and give them more  weight , to help him realize how  serious  the issue was. To help him understand that what he was risking, it wasn’t just his reputation. It was his entire career, his  life  if he somehow got behind a wheel someday. 

And Taehyung, who had won a bunch of Daesangs for his acting always convinced me that he understood what I was trying to say. That he understood the magnitude of my words and would heed them the next time. 

So really, what people didn’t understand was that....

That evening, when he stood in front of me and said that he slept with another woman because he got drunk out of his mind, it wasn’t the sleeping with the girl that had bothered me. ( at least not that much. it hurt of course but it wasn’t that strong. it stemmed more from a place of “why didn’t you just ask someone to drive you home, you idiot.”.. rather than, “ how dare you sleep with another woman?”  ) 

It was the got drunk out of my mind thing. 

That was what I ended my marriage over. 

That was it. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The details were hashed out easily and I didn’t particularly protest or change anything. Taehyung suggested an equal division of assets and I quickly disagreed. I wasn’t exactly poor. I worked as the Head of Marketing in a successful conglomerate. I had no use for excessive amounts of money. After some debate we agreed on setting up a trust fund for Hoshi with the money. He could use it after he turned twenty five. 

And then came the next part. 

Compensation for physical / Mental Damage. 

I felt like i was spiraling. 

“None On my side. None.” Taehyung said quickly and I swallowed. 

Ms Lee gave me an encouraging smile. 

“You can be honest Mrs Kim. We’re trying to go for a clean break between the two of you without any resentment carrying over. So its best to be honest. If you feel you need recompense for any emotional distress or abuse Mr. Kim may have put you through, you’re free to tell me. I’ll make sure it goes into record.” 

And this was why I hated the idea of getting divorce. 

That entire dialogue had sounded so...so... terrible. So accusatory and ugly. It wasn’t at all the way I felt about my husband. 

It was just hurt. Plain and simple hurt because he didn’t take me seriously. Because he didn’t think my words were worth listening to. It was hurt laced with fear because he was putting himself in danger with his reckless actions and I wanted him to stop. That’s all it was. 

It was hurt. 

Taehyung had hurt me but it wasn’t emotional distress. It sure as hell hadn’t been abuse.

“None for me either.” I said firmly, honest . 

I glanced at my husband, trying to tell him that I wasn’t just saying it. That it was true. I really didn’t want him to pay me money for what had happened. 

But, Taehyung wouldn’t meet my eyes.  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taehyung signed over full custody of Hoshi with a smile. 

“I trust you. “ He said quietly, penning his initials carefully on the document. 

I nodded, feeling a little like drowning.

 We had a very comfortable way of doing things as far as our son was concerned. Taehyung got Hoshi anytime he had time off and also on weekends. 

With a very shifting schedule it was hard for Taehyung to pin down exact dates so we had long decided we would make things easier for each other. He would call me a day or so in advance and i would drop him off at Taehyung’s penthouse or the company. Special days like birthdays were always celebrated in a neutral place with both parties attending. 

Hoshi loved it because it was a pleasant surprise for him, when his dad swooped in out of nowhere and took him off to amusement parks or arcades or swimming. He loved Taehyung . 

So the visitation rights were easy to sketch out. 

It was nothing new but to have it all put down on paper and initialed and notarized....it just felt invasive. Some judge somewhere would read all about how my marriage had crumbled to ashes and would pass judgment on me and that just felt odd. 

 Like airing your dirty laundry. Like letting strangers into your bedroom. 

And the worst part was this :   I felt myself getting upset , anytime Ms. Lee gave the slightest negative connotation to Taehyung’s actions or responsibilities. Anytime she tried to imply that he couldn’t be neglectful as  a father, I wanted to jump right up and defend him. To tell her that he was a better father than the ones who lived 24/7 with their kids and didn’t know a damn thing about them. 

That even as my husband,  he had been so good to me. Had treated me like his best friend, his confidante, his lover. Had never shied away from showing me how much he loved me. Had been the best husband in the whole entire world. 

And I hated myself for it. 

What was wrong with me? 

Why was  I still so fiercely protective of him, I wondered. I hated the idea of him being criticized by anyone for any of it.

 And it made feel like such a hypocrite because if he was so amazing, why on earth were we here??

Why on earth were we getting a divorce if Kim Taehyung was husband and father of the fucking Year?!! 

Was I making a mistake? Had I made a mistake? 

It confused me. These feelings that just refused to go away. I would never act on them because therein lay the path to misery but why were they still there? 

 This desperate clawing urge to make sure he came out of this whole debacle as a good guy. To make sure no one would brand him as a cheater . Because they would. When the divorce went public, they would dig things up and they would know. 

 I didn’t know how I’d gotten to this point where , I could somehow forget everything that was wrong, simply because I wanted to focus on what felt wrong....

Technically I should be happy. 

Taehyung did something unpardonable ( for me, at the time. Now I wasn’t so sure. Now I felt like I could forgive him for it but he hadn’t asked for forgiveness. What he’d asked for was a divorce.  ) and I left him. We were separated . And now finally we were getting a divorce. 

Divorce meant we could finally get out of this no man’s land of uncertainty where we had hung for two whole years and move on, from each other and finally give a label to where we stood. Exes. We were exes. We were done. It was over. 

Hadn’t I just yelled about him about how I liked labels? 

And yet, 

This entire divorce  felt so wrong. So unnecessary.

And in a moment of clarity, as I watched Ms Lee read he whole thing over again for our benefit, I realized why it felt wrong. 

It felt wrong because Taehyung was the one who wanted it. 

Why did Taehyung want it? What had made him want to end it, officially?

Was he seeing someone else? Was he considering seeing someone else? Did he want to start enjoying the single lifestyle again? 

Did he finally take a good long look at our marriage and found nothing worth salvaging anymore? 

My head ached. 

 I couldn’t wait for the whole thing to be over. And yet my heart broke at the thought of it. 

Ms Lee finally gathered up all the documents and gave us a wide smile.

“I wish every client I had was this reasonable. You two are a delight .” she shook her head. “ Should we get a drink to celebrate a day well spent?” 

I opened my mouth to accept when Taehyung said, “  Sure, but it would have to be a juice for me. I don’t drink.” 

I felt my heart take a swoop, nosediving to my knees. 

I stared at him, stunned speechless. 

“Haven’t had a drink in two years Mia. I’m done with that shit.” He said softly.

I swallowed. 

“I didn’t know that.” I felt miserable all of a sudden, the weight of what we had just done pressing down on my heart like a 200 pound stone, 

His gaze held mine.

“There’s a lot you don’t know.” 

We stood staring at each other in silence and Ms. Lee cleared her throat. 

“Uh... I just got a text from my next client. Maybe raincheck on the drinks? “

I nodded , watching her leave. Thank you i wanted to say, but for what?

 For ending my marriage of eight fucking years? 

And how ridiculous that very thought was. ..... She hadn’t ended our marriage,   I had. 

“I have the next two days off.” He said casually. 

“You can pick Hoshi up from my mom’s place. I need to head back to the office.” I muttered, choking a little on tears that had sprung out of nowhere. . 

“Hey.” his fingers closed over my wrists tugging me gently and I let myself get pulled into his arms. I hugged him, feeling my tears soak through the fabric of his shirt. 

“I’m sorry it has to be this way.” I choked out. 

He stroked the back of my head gently.

“Me too. “ He pressed a kiss to my hair and it only made me feel worse.  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Author’s Note : Tae is 35, OC is 32 

[laceandhockeyskates]

As friends ft. Quinn Hughes

Summary: 4 times that Quinn has you do something as friends + 1 time when it’s more.

Request: Absolutely none. Once again this is one that has been bugging me while I’m working.

A/N: This concept came to while I was in the middle of my shift. It started as Quinn asking a friend on a really adorable date, and it kind of just exploded and became this. It was originally suppose to be like..... a third of this length and somehow ended up as a 4+1

Warnings:

Word count: 5.8k

It had been a crisp October morning when you first met the rowdy group of hockey players at a charity event. They had come through and caught everyone’s attention with their loud laughter, and their general personalities. Somehow you had been roped into spending your day more or less babysitting the likes of Brock Boeser, Elias Pettersson, and Quinn Hughes. During those hours of rushing around and the chirps flowing back and forth a friendship had begun to form.

Over the following months your apartment became a hub of hockey players whenever there was a day off. They all swore that your tiny apartment had felt more like home than there own places, and that you made the best food which apparently was a lethal combination to you ever getting any alone time. You didn’t mind though. There was something about the way they filled your life that made it feel complete. 

It wasn’t just cozy nights in, but they were dragging you to their games and for a night out at the bar. Soon enough you found yourself a part of the entire group. It wasn’t just Brock, Elias, and Quinn but now the rest of the team and the girls had taken you in. You were spending almost as much time with Holly and the other WAGs as you were your favorite boys. There were days though that you forgot you were just a friend, and the life you were getting to live wasn’t truly yours. Eventually the boys would find girlfriends and you would start being invited less and less. Until that happened though you were going to take what you could.

----- i -----

The boys had been whispering about a charity event for weeks now knowing that it was important. Whenever it was brought up your heart tugged a little more for them considering how important doing something good for the community was to them. There was something special about the boys and how much they loved your city.

“So Brock finally found a girl to drag to the charity event,” Elias tenderly nudged his best friend as you returned to your living room with a bowl of popcorn as you took your seat beside Quinn again.

“Oh?” you asked them raising your eyebrows, “Should I be afraid you guys are replacing me as your favorite girl?”

Quinn had reached over grabbing a handful of the popcorn when Brock had opened his mouth. “I don’t think Huggy could ever replace you. So you don’t have to worry about that at least.”

You couldn’t help yourself as you glanced over at the boy in question who seemed to be glaring daggers at your mutual friend, but you knew that eventually you would be replaced even by him. 

“That’s okay. I’m sure whichever girl you two replace me with will end up being my best friend when they realize they have to deal with you two,” you teased as you dropped your head on Quinn’s shoulder listening to the laughter that you managed to pull from him. 

You wouldn’t admit to anyone, but Quinn was your favorite.

A few hours had passed since all of the jabs had been thrown away, and the boys were absorbed in whatever movie Elias had settled on finally. You excused yourself quietly from where you had been settled on the couch pressed against Quinn’s side in order to get yourself a fresh drink. 

What you hadn’t noticed was the defenseman also standing up and following you to the kitchen watching your every move as you refilled your glass before took notice of his presence. You shook your head mostly to yourself as you looked over at him again, “Did you want some water too?” You asked him quietly as you raised your eyebrows.

“No, I actually had a question for you though,” he admitted as he awkwardly leaned against the counter across from you as he reached up to rub the back of his neck. 

You decided to cross the small space and lean beside him as you looked up at your friend worried about him. “What is it?” You asked him curiously as you brought your glass to your lips taking a small sip.

“So I uh- I know you probably have plans for that weekend, but I was wanting to see if you would you know---come with me to the charity event? As friends?” He stammered out as he looked down at his feet unable to meet your gaze.

If he had he would have seen the wide smile that spread across your lips. Of course there was some disappointment in the friends comment, but you knew that you would have a lot of fun being on his arm. “Of course I would love to go with you, Quinn.”

The smile that he had returned when he looked up at you was worth any heart break you would have just being his friend.

----------

You knew that there was no reason for the butterflies attacking your stomach. Quinn had always made it quite clear you were nothing but his friend, but that never seemed to calm them. Your eyes ran over your own figure once last time as you took in the simple black dress that you settled on for the charity event. You had decided the more simple you went, the more Quinn could stand out and tonight was about him after all. 

Before your own mind could rope you into a spiral there was a knock on your front door pulling you out of your thoughts as you reached for your clutch and moved to pull open the door. You felt the way your stomach dropped while you watched Quinn let out a low whistle taking in the deep plunge of your dress and the high slit up your leg. 

“I don’t think anyone is going to notice I’m even there when you look that beautiful, Y/N,” Quinn reached for your hand placing a delicate kiss along your knuckles before pulling you out of the apartment and to his side.

The ride to the venue had been a comfortable silence between the two of you while you listened to the radio, but the quiet changed when you walked into the hall. It didn’t take any time before you found yourself roped into hugs and high fives with your friends. 

“Okay hotness,” You heard Holly joking from behind you before she pulled you into a quick hug herself, “I might have to upgrade tonight if Bo doesn’t behave himself!”

Her words had you laughing brightly as you looked back over towards her husband where he was standing with Quinn. Everyone in your lives knew just how smitten the two of you were with each other, but making the two of you see it yourselves was another story.

The evening flew by with Quinn’s hand nearly constantly on the small of your back keeping you close to him while he talked to the big wigs and front office people. It was interesting to watch him seemingly in his element with you at his side when usually he was far more nervous. 

It made you happy though to see him be so confident in himself the way he deserved to be. You knew more often than not that he tended to get into his own head and not see the man you, and everyone around you, saw.

It was getting late and the room was certainly thinning out when Quinn pulled you fully into his arms resting them tightly against your waist. “I was thinking we can ditch this place and maybe do a movie night? There’s a new one I wanted to see if you’re interested?”

You moved to wrap your own arms over his shoulders responding with a bright smile, “A movie night with just my favorite guy? I think I could handle that.” The words had passed your lips in a slur. Perhaps you had one or two too many drinks but Quinn just shook his head. He didn’t mind if you let loose if it meant you had fun.

It didn’t take long for Quinn to sweep you into your own apartment while you were giggling. You knew you had to get it together long enough to at least put your own pajamas on. You found yourself standing in the middle of your room trying to unzip your own dress.

Which was how Quinn found you once he had changed into a pair of sweats and a tee shirt he kept stashed in the spare bedroom for late nights that tended to turn into early mornings. “Do you need any help with that?” He asked you curiously as he leaned against the doorframe watching you.

You pouted as you finally dropped your hands to your sides, “It hates me. This dress is never ever coming off, Quinn. I’m going to have to live my entire life in this dress!” You exclaimed dramatically while you watched your best friend shove off from where he was and cross the room to you.

“Not that it would be the worst fate for the rest of us if you’re stuck wearing that dress, but I can rescue you,” he assured you as he slowly reached for the zipper tugging it down until it came to it’s resting stop. “There you go, beautiful.”

You watched in disappointment as he stepped out of your room to go to the living room to wait for you. You couldn’t focus on your own feelings though as you moved to change into a comfortable pair of pajamas before taking your make up off before joining Quinn on your couch.

You dropped your head to his chest as you settled in enjoying the feeling of him covering you with a blanket you always kept on the couch. “What movie did you settle on?” You asked him quietly not bothering to look at the screen. 

“Beauty and the Beast,” Quinn admitted running his hand through your hair as you finally turned your attention. You knew that he had decided on that movie specifically for you. It may not be your favorite movie, but it certainly was a top contender. 

You knew that you wouldn’t last too long, but before you knew it you were asleep in his arms. While it certainly wasn’t the first time that you fell asleep in Quinn’s arms. It was your favorite place to be and it never got old. 

When the morning came you found yourself carefully tucked into your bed with a note left on your nightstand to text your best friend when you actually were up for the day. 

---- ii ------

Months had passed since the charity event with nothing changing in your life. More often than not your favorite troublemakers were filling your living room still. Whether it was another movie night or the boys playing video games; they made sure you never felt like you were missing anything. 

Even they couldn’t hold off on the inevitable though. Eventually summer would come and the boys would be back home with their families leaving you alone in Vancouver until they’d return for training season. You tried to be excited for the boys, but you weren’t looking forward to months on your own after the months on end of constantly having someone around.

If you were honest though you knew that you weren’t ready to say goodbye to Quinn even if it was only for a few months. Of course you would miss your other troublemakers too. Brock always knew just to have you laughing, and Elias always knew when you needed a quiet moment away from everyone. But neither of them compared to Quinn. 

You were trying to enjoy the playoffs with the boys, and really whenever you blocked out the idea of being alone it wasn’t too difficult to actually have fun. You found yourself taking your typical spot for the warm ups near the ice beside Holly. “Nice jersey,” she teased glancing over at you with a warm smile.

You brushed it off with your own smile knowing that Quinn tended to enjoy whenever you wore the jersey to his games calling it his good luck charm. You knew that it never meant anything considering he probably would say it to any friend that he had it just so happened any friends he had in Vancouver besides you was on his team.

The Canucks went up 1-0 in their series that night, and Holly wasn’t hearing any of the protests that you tried to voice as she drug you through the tunnel. You knew that it would lead to the locker room where the rest of the WAGs and family were waiting to see their players, but you also knew that deep down it wasn’t where you belonged. If you even dared to voice that thought though you knew that you would have an entire hockey team hell bent on proving you wrong so you kept it to yourself. 

You were leaning against the brick wall watching as the team started to slowly come out. “Y/N!” Brock yelled as he came over swooping you up into his arms as he spun you around earning a warm laugh while doing so. 

Once you found yourself on solid ground again everything else melted away. You were there celebrating your friends’ win and nothing else mattered. A much quieter, “Hey” came from behind you causing you to spin around to face the person who had spoken up.

“Quinn!” you exclaimed moving to hug him tightly not noticing the jacket that was fisted in his hand as his arms came around you to hug you just as tightly. You didn’t miss the way he had held you there for an extra moment before the two of you had broke apart.

Quinn had started to say something when Brock came up swinging an arm to rest on the defenseman’s shoulders with a mischievous smile as he looked between the two of you. Quickly Quinn had shut down as you raised your eyebrows in Brock’s direction. 

“So what do you have there in your hands, buddy?” he asked curiously his full attention on the nervous brunette instead of on you. That was when you finally noticed the jacket in his hands and felt your own heart squeeze. You would know a WAG jacket anywhere considering the crowd that you ran with, but it didn’t make any sense. You would have known if Quinn had started to see someone, and they were reserved for just the wives and girlfriends. 

You watched as Quinn suddenly couldn’t meet your gaze while a flush of color raised to his cheeks. “I was just---I mean I know,” he slowly stammered out clearly full of nerves, “It’s just you spend your time at games with the wives and girlfriends--I just didn’t want you to feel left out. So I had them make a jacket for you to wear--as my friend,” he finally managed.

As his friend. You felt your heart sink at those specific words that he made sure to add so that you couldn’t even be given the hope that it could be more. You did your best though to keep the hurt from your face but when your gaze flicked to Brock who was thankfully the only one there to hear your heart being twisted. He shook his head though at the words knowing what an idiot the two of you were if only you would see it. 

You did your best to snap out of it though as you took the jacket from him with the best cheerful smile you could fake. “Of course I’ll wear it, Quinny. As your best friend.”

What you didn’t know though was hearing you call yourself just his best friend was twisting at his own heart too. It was a dangerous game he was playing with his own heart, but he wanted to take anything that you would give him.

----iii----

It wasn’t the boys’ year to lift Lord Stanley. They had a couple of good wins, and a lot of close ones, but it hadn’t been enough to move past the second round that year. Elias was the first one to leave claiming that he was in dire need to see his family had been more than fair. Brock wasn’t too far behind him which left you and Quinn alone in the city for a few days without your friends hanging around. 

The first day had been spent on the water front enjoying the feeling of the warm summer air on your skin while you walked around. The second day had been spent packing what he needed to head to his parents’ lake house. Now it was the day before he took off and you had locked yourselves away in your apartment curled up together on the couch while you binge watched whatever show Quinn had turned on. You found yourself tucked tightly in his side as you tuned out the show feeling anxious about what tomorrow would bring.

You were sure that he was able to read that something was off about you, but he didn’t mention it seemingly content in just being there with you. You didn’t realize though that he was just as anxious as you were. He wasn’t ready to be away from you for months when he barely got through being away on a roadie. Which was why he had asked his parents if he could bring you, but he knew that you had your own family and your own life to live in Vancouver. He couldn’t just whisk you off for a summer on the lake with his family. Even if it was where he thought you were meant to be.

You felt the way that he tangled his hand in your hair as he shifted in order to be able to look down at you. “You should come with me to the lake house, Y/N. At least for a week. My parents were asking to see you again. I know you have your own thing going on here, but I--I’d like it if you were there. You’re my best friend after all.”

“Quinn,” you stated as you adjusted in order to prop yourself up on your elbow to be leaning over him with a smile as you studied his face, “Are you trying to say you don’t want to be without your best friend even for a little bit?” You asked him knowing that your own parents were spending the summer with your grandparents in Seattle. 

“I haven’t been without you since October,” he grumbled mostly to himself as his hand dropped to your shoulder. “But I think you would have fun with us. I’m sure your family will want to steal you away though now that classes are over too.”

“Actually my plans for the summer were to sulk around the city missing my favorite boys. So if your mom really won’t be put out by having another mouth to feed I think I can squeeze in some Hughes brothers time.” You already knew the answer though knowing that his mom would have personally dragged you onto the plane herself. 

You had met his parents a few times when they had visited during the season, and even had the chance to meet both Luke and Jack. You adored each member of the Hughes family considering you saw so much of the man you loved in each of them, so spending your summer surrounded by them certainly wasn’t going to be putting you out in any way. You also knew that each member of the Hughes family would be over the moon to have you there. Mostly Jack and Luke loved having any reason to pick on their older brother, but his mom enjoyed seeing her son happy. If you only knew the conversations they had about you.

You loved hearing Quinn’s laughter. It was something you often had to fight for, but whenever you were rewarded with it your heart went soaring. “It’s actually adorable that you think my mom wouldn’t choose having you there over me.”

A few days later you found yourself sitting on the dock in a wooden Adirondack chair soaking in the sun with Quinn’s mom while the boys were along the shoreline each with a fishing pole in hand. You couldn’t hear their conversation but every once in awhile one of them would start laughing. There was something about watching Quinn enjoy some bonding time with his brothers that wedged it’s way into your heart.

“I’ve never seen him so happy,” his mother’s voice pulled you from your own thoughts as you looked away from where your eyes had been settled unsurprisingly on an all too familiar defenseman. “I’m glad you came. I know it means a lot to him.”

“I’m just happy to spend the summer with you all. I was preparing for a very lonely few months in Vancouver,” you admitted even though you knew the moment he learned that was your entire plan he would have figured something out. You were just happy with how things were now.

Ellen leaned forward in her chair as she smiled warmly, “He would have never allowed that to happen. You’re the most important person in his life, and I’m just lucky I have two other mama boy’s now so I’m not completely replaced.” She was joking considering how much it warmed her heart for him to have you.

“I’m sure we will both be replaced eventually when the right girl comes along we will both be replaced. Hopefully she’ll be good enough for him,” you mused quietly. You knew though that no girl would ever be good enough for him.

You completely missed the way she was looking at you. You both could say that everything you did was just as friends, but she knew better if only you two would see it.

----iv----

The summer had flown past you in a blur of sun filled days, and before you knew it you and Quinn had returned to Vancouver just in time for your next semester and his training camp to start. Despite every concern you had the previous spring you and your friends had fallen back to your old routines. Your apartment was still the place to be when they needed comfort, and they drug you out whenever they thought school was consuming you more than normal.

There had been a change though. Quinn had somehow become even more physically attached to you than he had before the summer on the lake. You weren’t sure how it was possible, but he managed it somehow. His hand always seemed to find it’s way just under whatever shirt you were wearing to rest against the skin on your waist, or rest on your bare ankle whenever your feet were in his lap. It was as if he needed the skin on skin contact.

All too soon October was upon you with the crisp chill air and the leaves falling from the trees. Personally you never found Vancouver more beautiful than you did when autumn hit. Between the hockey schedule and your own classes it wasn’t always easy to find a full day off, but they had a Friday off and you had all agreed that you needed a night out to let loose.

You had settled on a simple black body suit with a pair of leather pants. You weren’t aiming to find someone to take home when you got dressed, but you knew that at least you looked good if Brock’s teasing wolf whistle or Elias’ spinning you around was any indication. 

The bar top was full making it nearly impossible to get the attention of the bartender on your own. That was until you felt a hand on the small of your back before flagging down someone. Of course being a popular face in Vancouver tended to make sure you weren’t ignored. Quinn didn’t spare a look your way when he placed an order for your favorite drink earning him the happiest smile from you. There was something special about the fact that he remembered what you enjoyed.

“Thank you, Quinn,” you muttered against his shoulder as you glanced up at him noting how his eyes had shifted over to you as he smiled in return. 

“Anything for you,” he murmured in return as his hands played with the ends of your hair. “I actually had something to ask you anyways and getting you a drink gave me a chance.”

“Oh?” you asked him as the bartender slid your drink over to you before moving along. You knew anything that he asked you that you would do what you could in order to make it happen for him. You were wrapped around his finger in the same way he was around your own.

With his free hand he reached up in order to rub the back of his neck seemingly nervous although you couldn’t place why. “I realized that there’s only one Saturday before the end of the month that we both are free. And I was thinking maybe we could go to the pumpkin patch? Y--you know as a friend. I just---I know you love the pumpkin patch and i really wanted to go enjoy one together this year.”

It felt like your heart was warming up in your chest as you listened to. Pumpkin patches had always had a special place in your heart so it meant a lot to you that he even remembered that and wanted to go with you. “Of course. Although I do demand that you get me an apple cider while we’re there.”

“I think it’s something that I can manage,” Quinn agreed as you were roped back into your friend group again for the rest of the evening.

The next morning had come far too soon with a pulsating migraine that had you groaning into your pillow. You remember up until rejoining the boys at the table and being dared into a few shots with Brock, after that it was a dark blur but when you rolled over you noticed a glass of water on your nightstand. A smile tugged tenderly at your lips knowing that Quinn had been the one to make sure you made it home safely.

You gave yourself a few more moments in bed before you forced yourself away from the warmth of your blankets in order to get ready. You settled on keeping things simple as you slid your favorite knit sweater and skinny jeans on knowing you would rather be warm than to focus on your looks. After all it was just Quinn and while you always wanted it to mean more you knew it never would.

You weren’t sure how long had passed as you tried to tame your hair and throw some simple make up on your face when you heard a knock on your door. “Give me a second!” You called out putting down the brush you were using before rushing to the door. 

You knew that you couldn’t help the smile on your face when you saw Quinn standing there with two cups of coffee in his hand. “I took a guess that a pumpkin patch day meant pumpkin spice latte for you?” He asked you keeping his voice low as he held the cup in question out to you. 

You didn’t even hesitate to take the cup from his hands. “It’s almost like you know me better than myself,” you teased as you took a step back into the apartment. “I just need to put my shoes on and I will be ready to head out.”

-----

Feeling the chill of the air surround you as you studied each pumpkin wanting to select the perfect ones to take home with you, by which you meant the ones that would be over looked and needed just to be loved by you. It was the same exact reason you got the saddest looking tree every Christmas. Brock always argued that they didn’t know the difference, but Quinn always encouraged your need to give your love to the ones who needed it the most. Whether it made a difference or not, because it made a difference to you.

“Are any of them calling your name yet?” Quinn asked as he slipped his hand around yours. It wasn’t uncommon for the two of you to find ways to cling to one another, or even to hold hands, but it always felt new. The butterflies that erupted in your stomach always took your breath away. 

You tried to keep things casual though as you shrugged your shoulders, “There’s a lot of them that I feel like could use me but I haven’t found the ones that need me just yet.”

“Then we keep looking,” Quinn offered always having patience in spades for you especially if he knew that you were going to be happy.

It was only fifteen minutes later that you finally found the perfect three to take home with you. With the brightest smile on your face you didn’t even fight Quinn as he paid for the pumpkins. Anything that had you looking that happy was worth any dollar amount to him.

---+i---

You were standing at work waiting for a fresh cup of coffee to brew. You weren’t sure if it was your third or forth cup of the morning, but between the lack of sleep the night before and what essentially had felt like everything at work turning into a dumpster fire before your very eyes. There was no telling if you would be surviving the next hour with your sanity much less making it to the end of the day and your only hope to do so was with coffee. Unsafe amounts or otherwise.

What you hadn’t expected was for your best friend to surprise you. It was almost like Quinn had a special sense of when you were stressed out and one of his magical hugs would be your saving grace. You weren’t sure of the magic or science behind it, but you were grateful for it. 

You felt a pair of strong arms wrap themselves around your waist holding you to a familiar chest. “There you are beautiful,” he murmured quietly against your hair before he finally let you go so that you could turn around to face him. 

“Ah yes so shocking I’m at work during my usual hours,” you teased him as you stepped away from his hold. You never could trust yourself so close to him, but today you were feeling especially at risk to just pull him down for a kiss. With everything going on around you he was your one constant. 

It had been obvious to you for the last few months that you were in love with your best friend, but as in love as you were you knew that he didn’t return those feelings. All you were to him was his friend, and at least you had some part of him in your life.

He didn’t allow you to go very far though as his hands settled on your hips pulling you back towards him. He had a smile on his face that you had never seen before, but you realized quickly that it was your favorite of his. “Well okay you have a solid point. I just figured that you needed a movie night tonight, but I figured I could make dinner for you. I just wanted to see if there was any special requests?”

You couldn’t help the way your eyebrows scrunched together as you tried to figure out what was going on. “I could always go for some pasta, and I feel like that might be something that can turn out edible. I love you but I haven’t forgotten about the time you tried to make me breakfast and we had to air out my entire apartment all day.”

In Quinn’s defense he did at least look bashful at the reminder of that morning. You still remembered the squeeze of your heart of affection seeing him trying to make you food. It had meant the entire world to you that he had even tried to take care of you even if it hadn’t turned out the way that he had planned.

“Okay so that wasn’t my finest hour, but I’m really going to impress you tonight. I promise,” he had left quickly with a fast kiss to your forehead so that you could return to work. Although you weren’t sure if you would be able to focus on what was going on around you when your entire focus on what was happening in your apartment. 

Every day you couldn’t wait until it was time to leave for the day, but today it had been nearly impossible to make it through everything you had to before you left. You couldn’t rush any faster to your apartment reasoning with yourself that it was just to make sure that it was still in one piece and not on fire, but you knew that it was just to see what Quinn was up to.

You had barely opened the door as you called out for your best friend, but the first thing you had noticed was the fact that it seemed as if your apartment was shadowed in darkness. For a moment you began to think you mixed up what apartment you were suppose to meet at but it was always your apartment that you hung out at. It was that moment that you had noticed the flicker of candles. 

Candles. As you stepped farther into the apartment you noticed that there had to be almost a hundred lit candles around your living room. “Quinn?” You asked hearing the question in your voice.

You eyes finally settled on him as he stepped out of your kitchen wearing a look that you hadn’t seen before. “I--I’ve been wanting to ask you on a date for so long, Y/N. Not as a friend, but as more. And every time I chickened out. But tonight I’m not. I planned an entire Harry Potter movie marathon with your favorite candies. I even made sure to find some new fuzzy socks with your house crest on it, and I bought some new blankets to curl up under.” Everything he said was quickly worded as if it wasn’t out there fast he wouldn’t be able to get through it. “So what do you say? One date as more than friends?”

You didn’t bother with a verbal response as you reached up to finally kiss your best friend allowing your lips meld together. It was everything you had dreamt it would be and somehow better. “I can handle way more than one date if you’re interested in that.”

His smile lit up as he leaned in resting his forehead to yours, “I’m absolutely more than interested in more than just one date, Y/N. I’m interested in everything with you.” Quinn leaned back in pressing a deeper kiss to your lips sealing your future together with it.

[twerkinwithhazza]

Pumpkin Seeds

Author’s Note: UH OHHH BACK AGAIN. I’m back yall finally off hiatus all because my phone is broken LOL. Anywho tumblr is a totally different place and most of my mutuals are adulting now. I would love new tumblr friends and I’m gonna try to continue this writing stuff but I’m busy with adult things now lol and it really depends on if you guys like what you see. Please excuse my rustiness this my first imagine in years... literally. I’ll get better with time. This was also slightly edited but I know there bound to be some mistakes. Anyways watch the Golden music video for clear skin and I hope you guys enjoy!  I think it's so adorable that whoever requested this thought this request wouldn't speak to me lol ! It definitely did because this went from a blurb to a full blown imagine.

psst you can read my other work here!

Warnings: smut smut smut and more smut and possible shitty writing, dirty talk, light choking, and some cursing.

Glossary: (y/c/n)= your cousins name + (y/m/n)= your mothers name

Request: hi!!!! if you are wrtiting for Harry please can you do one where missus and Harry are at a family party and have a quickie in the bathroom? don’t worry if it’s not speaking to you lol xxx

Normally you and your husband loved spending time with your families. Harry was always playing a balancing act between filming music videos, doing interviews, writing sessions, and an occasional date night in the house that always involved a Postmates order from your favorite restaurants and the two of you binge-watching Netflix on shuffle. As much as the both of you enjoyed stuffing your face with poke bowls from Poke Papa and watching True Crime stories, it wasn’t exactly romantic or fulfilling for the both of you, just enough to hold you over until his schedule clears up. So when Harry finally got a weekend off, you guys were ecstatic! You spent the week cleaning the house and meal prepping so no Postmates would be needed and Harry used his free time in between interviews for shopping for special toys and pretty lingerie he wanted to see you model for him. Flirty text messages were sent back and forth during small work breaks about your plans for the weekend and now all the two of you had to do was make it Saturday.

You’re not gonna like this...

The 5 words that destroyed you and Harry’s weekend plans. Anne called while you were organizing your closet and announced that her and Gemma, along with your parents and favorite cousins were coming to town to spend time with the two of you. You tried to convince her that maybe a small dinner party at that new fancy restaurant downtown would be a perfect spot for a get together but she was adamant about coming over to cook the two of you a homecooked meal. Breaking the news to Harry was the worst part, he was clearly devastated (you swore you saw the man shed a few tears). Now here you were stuffing your mouth with Anne’s famous juicy cooked duck instead of your husband's juicy di...

“(Y/N) can you pass me the mashed potatoes”

Your dad’s strong yet muffled voice interrupted your train of thought and broke you out of your horny trance as he chowed down on his meal. Pushing the dish over in your dad's direction allowed you the chance to look around and take a glance at Harry who was making small talk with one of your favorite cousins. He was wearing a black button-down shirt, of course with a few buttons loose, and his cross necklace bounced on his chest as he laughed at your cousin's crazy work stories. You focused on his fingers, his infamous rings adorned his hands, you noted that they were slightly damp from eating and the condensation on his glass cup. As you were drinking in his appearance a small damp spot was forming in your panties but given that there were too many eyewitnesses including, yours and his parents so you chose to just clamp your thighs shut and stuff your mouth with more mashed potatoes. 

Harry deserved his credit as a husband. Despite his calm demeanor, he was very well aware of your little ordeal yet still managed to give interview advice to (y/c/n) and compliment your mom’s cocktail mix. He was quite amused by how increasingly frustrated you were becoming. He noted your concentrated face as you munched harshly on a string bean, hands clenching onto the fork for dear life. He decided to do a little temperature check to truly see how far gone you were.

“So what are we thinking for dessert pecan pie or crumble cake ?”, Harry questioned as he stuck his fork in his mouth, pulling it out again once all the gravy was licked clean. Your eyes finally met and you can tell that he was tossing the ball in your court, it was your job to show him how you wanted the game to be played.

“Mmm I don’t know I guess I’ll have some pecan pie but I really wish I had some pumpkin seeds”, you flatly said as you finished sipping your wine, maintaining full eye contact with him.

Pumpkin seeds. You and Harry were “outside of the box” thinkers, you had to be with his life as a celebrity not exactly pairing well with your shared sexual fantasies. You had code words to indicate to each other when you were craving the other one's touch, but you knew that using the same words around friends, family, and other public figures for too long would possibly cause some suspicion. So your code words changed with the seasons, literally. When the leaves started turning that classic golden yellow and auburn, your code words changed thus came the use of the word Pumpkin Seeds.

Gemma and your mom shared a glance, raising their eyebrows in collective confusion.

“Pumpkin seeds.. For dessert ?” Gemma finally burst out., both of your mothers soft laughter followed in the background.

“Heyyy” ,Harry pouted as he bopped Gemma on the nose with some gravy ,“ I have you know Pumpkin Seeds are one of our favorite midnight snacks”. 

“Gross“, Gemma stuck out her tongue and wiped her nose. You couldn't tell whether she was referring to the gravy on her nose, your choice of midnight snacks, Harry’s smug statement followed by a wink at you, or a combination of all three.

“Well we can be concerned with dessert once we break out the baby pictures, I’ve been dying to see the infamous skinny dipping picture (y/m/n) has been telling me about”. Anne clapped her hands together and hopped out of her seat heading to the kitchen. Your mother followed behind but not before instructing you to head up to the attic to retrieve the pictures. You glanced at Harry but he seemed occupied cleaning up the dinner plates with your dad. You let out a frustrated huff and made your way up to the attic to grab the photo albums. 

As you shuffled through old boxes holding Harry’s old tour outfits and your little knickknacks from your travels, you heard the attic door open.

“Pumpkin seeds huh?”, Harry lightly chuckled letting the attic door close and leaning against the door frame. 

You refused to make eye contact with him, continuing to shuffle through the bins locating a few photo albums as you went , “It was only a matter of time Harry and you know it. Our weekend got stolen and we haven’t... ya know in like two weeks. So, yes Harry I want some damn pumpkin seeds.”

You let out a huff. You didn’t mean to come off so sassy and aggressive but you were frustrated… sexually. Your cousin was getting more Harry time in the 3 hour family dinner than you had gotten in the past two weeks. You stacked the photo albums gently on top of each other and cradled them in your arms, finally turning to face your husband but you didn't have to look very far. Harry had closed that gap between the two of you, gripping your face and making you look up at him causing you to drop the albums in shock. 

“Well let’s get you your pumpkin seeds then”

That’s all it took and sparks turned into a flame, you and Harry’s bodies connected and a feverish makeout session broke out. You both were so hungry for each other after weeks of neglects and it just felt so damn good to finally connect. Harry’s wet kisses were making their way down your neck, nipping and sucking as he goes. You knew he was getting into it and normally you would be completely here for it if your kitchen wasn’t flooded with family members waiting to laugh at your baby pictures.

“Baby.. we… fuckkkkk”, You moaned out as Harry popped one of your nipples out of his mouth before moving to nip on the next one. “Baby we can’t your mom is downstairs… we have to go”, you finally let out and glanced down at your husband as pinched your nipples between his finger tips. “When has that ever stopped us”, he slyly laughs. In one swift motion, he turned you around pulling your back into his chest pulling down your skirt. You couldn’t even get words of protest out, Harry had his hands wrapped around your neck and was already freeing himself from his pants and boxers. He pulled your panties to the side and let out a hiss as he watched a string of your arousal stretch from your dripping flower to his fingers.

“Baby please just do something”, you huffed out a soft moan as you waited in anticipation. The grip around your throat tightened as he entered you, both of you letting out a sigh of relief. Harry completely bottomed out inside of you, touching that special spot that only he could. Your walls clenched around him, holding him in snug almost as if your pussy was begging him not to leave. Normally the two you were very vocal during sex from dirty talk to his loud moans and your even louder cries of pleasure. However you both knew that wasn’t possible right now and kept your moans down as much as you could. Harry was not making it easy though and the noise coming from the two of your bodies colliding were basty in the best ways possible. With every thrust of Harry’s hip you could hear your wetness coating Harry dick and as Harry picked up the speed his balls roughly tapped on your clit, only adding to your pleasure. You could barely form thoughts let alone sentence, Harry was literally fucking you silly and using your G-Spot as punching bag for his dick, The sounds and the pleasure were clearly getting to Harry as well, the grip he had on your hips grew tighter and his eyes were squeezed shut. 

“Bloody fucking hell you’re so tight around me, can’t even take it”, he groans and throws his head back as he roughly draws your hips into his. It didn’t even feel like it was possible but Harry picked up the speed of his thrust continuing the assault on your poor needy pussy even further. The pleasure was all too much and that oh so familiar feeling hit the pit of your stomach and you were starting to lose your composure. Your moans were getting increasingly louder and your grip on Harry was growing tighter. Harry knew his wife and he knew your dam was getting closer and closer to breaking and he was determined to get you there. He placed a hand over your mouth and moved his other hands down to your clit rubbing it in slow circles. “ Look at you” he cooed cockily, “Taking me so fucking well like a good girl should. Barely let out a scream ‘cus you don’t want your parents to hear how much of a cock whore you are”. He knew you wouldn’t last long with the way he was talking to you and he was absolutely correct because his words were driving you insane. As the pressure was continued building up in your stomach, you felt the telling twitch in Harry’s dick that let you know he was approaching his end too.

“Gonna give me what I want uh? Gonna cum all over my cock and let me cum in that tight little pussy of yours. You gotta hold it in.. don’t want to leave any drops for our guest to find huh? Gonna be a good girl and hold all my cum in you?”, Harry grunted into your ear as you whimpered against his hands. You were seeing stars and feeling butterflies in the pit of your stomach and you knew it was only a matter of time before you both came undone.” Oh baby”, you whined and your head fell down as the pressure from your stomach finally was released as your orgasm spilled out all over Harry’s dick and thighs. The gushing feeling from your orgasm and your weak whimpers and cries drove Harry overboard, burying his face in your neck and his roughly groaning as he released inside of you. The two of you stayed connected for a bit, thighs stuck together thanks to your shared orgasm with Harry’s arm wrapped around your waist supporting both of your weights up as you composed yourselves. When he finally pulled out of you, you kept every drop he gave you tucked inside your tight walls just as promised. 

“So those Pumpkin Seeds huh”

[i-like-writing-stuff]

four months; part 2 [five hargreeves x reader]

a/n: thank you all so so much for your support and feedback! i literally could not believe that the first part has over 200 notes and yall want a continuation like omagash??? im soft, thank you guys <3

here is the long awaited part two, but before we dive into that, i felt the need to ask yall if you want five to be aged up?? in most x reader i’ve read on this site, five is aged up, but I felt like, in my case, i didn’t really needed to mention that because i am only like two months older than the actor, and its not like im gonna write smut with him- gross. point is, idk. should i age him up tho??? idk what to do, so here are both aidan and timothee to soothe ur heart for this second part!! <3

(the gifs do not belong to me, lemme know if u know who made them so i can give credits- they’re real cute mah gawsh!!!)

alsoo if you want more five imagines or literally any other hargreeves sibling or fictional character ousside tua, feel free to leave a request in my inbox! kisses <3

summary: after a long family meeting and more booze, you decide to make a bold move and profess your buried feelings.

part 1

“Men are stupid shitheads.” You concluded, setting your flask on the counter, looking at the new bangs Allison had just cut for you.

Even in her drunken state, they seemed to be very nicely done. You were quite surprised by the way they turned out, but pleased nonetheless. It was a spontaneous decision, getting bangs. You had been sitting in the hair salon she was working at with her, Klaus and Vanya after a not so great family meeting.

Hugs were shared, true, but then arguments started and before you even knew it, Luther stormed out, Diego followed him, Five went missing for whatever business he had, and Klaus claimed that Ben was not even there- apparently, ghosts can’t time travel.

So, it was just the four of you, drunk in a hair salon, with too much alcohol and way too many scissors around you, complaining about how shitty your love lives could be.

“Amen.” Klaus raised his drink in the air, “I’ll drink to that.”

“Right?” Allison nodded, combing her second client, Klaus, “The nerve of Ray! I mean, one thing goes wrong and he’s on a warpath!” She vented, holding the bottle of liquor in her free hand, “I mean, doesn’t know who I am?! No, no! No, Ray- you know exactly who I am, you just can’t handle it!”

You watched with a raised brow as Vanya was out of zone, pretending to be shooting the long line of empty bottles gathered in front of her, as Allison kept on continuing her rant. Her husband had just seen her use her powers on the night they started the protest, and was now having a real hard time comprehending what was going on. You didn’t see him at home either, so you figured he may have been upset with you as well for maybe hiding the secret. Or maybe he thought you were like her, who knows?

“Hey, wouldn’t it be weird if Five grew up all hot?” Klaus suddenly asked, taking a drag out of his cigarette, as he got up from his seat to walk around the hair salon, “Wouldn’t that be weird?”

“Why would you even think of your brother like that?” You asked riddled, narrowing your eyes at the man as his sisters almost gagged at the thought.

“Oh, please, you’ve been thinking that, haven’t you?” Klaus asked, pointing at you as you took another swig from your nearly empty flask.

“I... I mean- he’s... Five... uh... no comment!” You suddenly declared, at loss of words, as you got up from your seat, trying to maintain your balance as you made your way towards the bottle of liquor to fill your flask again.

“When are you two gonna confess your feelings?” Allison asked with a groan, letting her head fall backwards as she sat on the chair, “It’s getting really tiring!”

“We have an apocalypse going on!” You argued, “There’s no time for feelings!”

“This is the perfect time for feelings!” Klaus chimed in, taking another drag out of his cigarette, “These might be your last six days on Earth! Do you want to die regretting that you never told Five how you felt about him?”

“I’m not having this conversation anymore.” You declared, out of arguments, as you poured liquor in your flask, “Why don’t we talk about Allison’s crush on Luther instead?”

“We have never even kissed!” Allison defended herself, causing Vanya to spin on her chair confused, looking between the three of you.

“Yeah, but you guys were making little sick moon-dog eyes at each other all through puberty and breakfasts and... all that.” Klaus waved her off, sipping from his own flask.

“Aren’t we all brothers and sisters, or...?” Vanya wondered confused, as you and Klaus snorted amused at her innocence.

“Well... technically...” Allison tried to find an excuse or explanation, but she was having a hard time putting her thoughts in place.

“Technically?” Klaus raised a brow, “If you....” He stammered, trying to regain his train of thought, “If you have to use the word technically, you’re already in trouble.”

“Okay, can we go back to Five and Y/N?” Allison tried to change the subject, “Or maybe at least help me save my marriage?”

“That’s like...” Klaus stumbled on his own feet, filling his flask again, as you leaned against Vanya’s chair curiously, “That’s like asking a nun how to hump someone’s leg! I mean, who in this room knows shit about relationships? This one?” He asked, pointing at Vanya, “In secret love with some farm Frau!”

“Her name’s Sissy.” Vanya informed him.

“Which is an improvement on her previous love interest.” He said, looking at you and Allison, as you shook your heads to slightly tell him to shut up, “...the serial killer.”

“What?!” Vanya yelled, looking between you and Allison for an explanation, but you just softly waved her off, promising to remind her later.

“And look at this one!” Klaus ignored the three of you, pointing at... well, you, “A fifty year old assassin, who got the chance to be a teen again, but she is too afraid to admit her feelings for the... wait, is Five a boy or a man?”

“Both?” You raised a brow, unsure of the answer.

“Meanwhile, I’m carrying a torch for a soldier I haven’t technically met yet, and Luther is in love with his sister.” Klaus waved you off, trying to keep his balance again on his feet.

“Okay, again- we are not biological!” Allison tried to defend herself once more, but Klaus simply ignored her.

“Face it, the healthiest long-term relationship in this family was when Five was banging that mannequin.” He said, making all of you nod in agreement, as you couldn’t help but confess, taking another chug out of your flask;

“I can’t believe I got to the point where I was jealous of Dolores.”

Okay, maybe ‘banging’ and ‘jealous’ were strong words, but you had to admit you were not that pleased when one of the first things that Five did when he got back to 2019, was go to some store to get back his plastic girlfriend who kept him company in the four decades he spent all by himself in the apocalypse.

You understood his mind, though. You would have gone insane as well if you had to be all alone after the end of the world, without another soul on the planet. Nonetheless, you still were maybe a tad too happy when he decided to return her to the store.

Leaving you the only woman he had eyes for, unbeknownst to you.

“I’m gonna tell Sissy that I love her.” Vanya suddenly declared, straightening her position confidently.

“You go, girl!” You cheered, clapping for your friend.

“I don’t want any secrets.” She said, making you and the other two nod in agreement, contemplating about your own lives.

“Yeah!” Allison said, getting up with the bottle of alcohol tightly clutched in her hand, “Yeah, yeah- you’re right! Yes, ‘cause, you know- if this all goes tits-up, the least I can do is be honest with my husband!

“Oh, does that mean I have to face my cult?” Klaus sighed, “I just hate group break-ups, it’s why I stopped dating twins!”

You pondered about it for a moment, in your state that was definitely not the most sober. You had a lot of alcohol coursing through your veins, but you felt like maybe it was better. You could think with your heart more than you could think with your brain, and your heart was telling you that your friends were right.

They all are getting themselves ready to take big risks in their lives, why shouldn’t you? They had a valid point; the world was gonna end in six days if you guys couldn’t find a way to solve this. Last time you didn’t have the brightest plan, so why should this time be a success? Reality hit you; there was a real big chance that you might die.

So why not just be honest with Five? What was the worst that could happen? You manage to save the world and Five rejects you? Big deal!

Well, it actually was a big deal.

“What if he rejects me?” You asked all of a sudden, causing the three siblings to turn to you, “What if I tell Five how I feel about him and he rejects me? I know maybe at my age I shouldn’t be this anxious about a man, but... it’s not like I’m going anywhere, I’m glued to the Hargreeves clan.”

And it was true. After the events of the 2019 apocalypse, right before you and the others got separated, you shared an adorable moment in which you confessed to each other how happy you were to have met and be taken into their family as one of their own.

“Normally, I’d say to not ponder on that for too... long.” Klaus slurred, “But given that it’s Five, you don’t even have to worry about that.”

“He’s right.” Allison shrugged, “That won’t be a problem.

“I have no memory of any of you, but from the hug I’ve seen you two share earlier- you’re not just friends.” Vanya spoke up, making you stare into nothingness for a moment.

I mean, it’s Five we are talking about. If he were to have any feelings, it’s not like he’d be honest with them or act, right? It would be up to you to make the first move.

You let out a long sigh, rubbing your hands on your upper arms, reminding yourself of the hug. It may have been the first time you and Five actually hugged, in all the years you’ve known each other. The way he held you close and nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck, taking in your scent, feeling you in his arms, even if for him it had been only four days. You had to live with the thought that he may be dead for months.

And you hated that, you knew you wanted him alongside you. You wanted that little rude, at times obnoxious dipshit, with a soft heart- as much as he hated to admit it. You loved how much he cared about his family, about saving the world. Five is a great person; he is caring and has a big heart, as much as he tried to hide it behind his trashmouth.

“Fine!” You groaned, letting your head fall backwards, “I’ll tell Five I fucking love him and his dipshit face!”

“Yes!” Klaus clapped, as Allison and Vanya cheered proudly, “Come here!”

You and Vanya walked towards him, as Allison wrapped an arm around his waist, waiting for the two of you to skip towards them, pulling you into a group hug, as “Twistin’ the night away” by Sam Cooke blasted on the radio, causing the four of you to start a small dance party, letting for the first time in a long while your problems just go away.

For the sake of the song.

After a couple more hours of drinking, gossiping and dancing, the four of you decided to finally part ways and attend your promised business. Klaus went to deal with his cult, as Allison decided to be completely honest with her husband at home and Vanya was going to confess to Sissy.

As for you?

You were going to tell Five Hargreeves you were in love with him.

“Hey, dipshit!” You confidently yelled, running up the stairs of the store, trying to find Five.

“Y/N?” Five frowned, walking out of the kitchen with a coffee mug in his hands and a confused look on his face, “Are you... even more drunk? And did you get bangs- what the...?”

“Shut up.” You waved him off, walking towards him to grab the mug out of his hand to sober yourself up, “Why in the hell are you even drinking coffee at this hour?”

“I’m... trying to calm myself...” He frowned, watching as you chugged his freshly poured coffee.

“Normally I’d ask.” You said, setting the mug on the counter, shaking your head, “But right now what I have to say is more important.”

“Is that so?” Five raised a brow curiously, as you slowly slapped your cheeks, trying to get the room to stop moving, “Why don’t you go to bed?” He asked, gently pushing you towards the couch, “And we talk in the morning? I don’t really have time for this.”

“No!” You yelled, stopping in your tracks to poke his chest, “We don’t have to talk! I talk and you- you listen!” You said, poking his chest again, “You never have time for anything, all you can think of is your stupid apocalypse!”

“Oh yes, isn’t that a trivial thing to be thinking of?” He asked with a sarcastic smile, crossing his arms.

“I don’t need your sarcasm!” You yelled, poking his chest a third time, feeling him get more tense.

“I swear to God, Y/N, if you do that one more time-...” Five took in a deep breath, as he could feel as he was slowly losing his patience.

“Shut up!” You groaned, watching as his brows knitted in confusion, “I’m trying to confess my feelings for you, you moron!”

“W...What?” He asked, as his face suddenly softened, unfolding his arms.

“I’m in love with you!” You sighed, rubbing your face, “Okay? I-I am in love with you and I am trying to sober myself up, but I think I may have had too much to drink.”

“You think?” Five scoffed, slowly leading you towards the couch, “Are you sure you’re not saying this just because you have a ton of alcohol coursing through you?”

“Well... kinda, ‘cause if I were sober there was no way in hell I would have confessed.” You puffed, complying, as you let yourself guided by him, “Allison, Klaus and Vanya all convinced me that I should tell you, that we only have six days left on Earth and in case we don’t save it... I shouldn’t be going down with regrets.”

Five listened to your every word carefully, as you continuing venting about how his siblings spent the whole day trying to convince you to tell him about your feelings, as he slowly held your hands, as you took a seat on the couch. He nodded at your words to let you know that he was listening, as he took two pillows off the armchairs beside, placing them at one end, softly pushing you down.

“...and then Klaus said that he hates group breakups.” You said, not even noticing what was going on, feeling your lids get heavier once your head met the pillow.

“Not a surprise there...” Five muttered, grabbing the blanket that was rested on top of the couch, placing it over you.

“Are you trying to dismiss me?” You wondered, but still making yourself more comfortable, as you sat on your side, with your head facing Five, who knelt in front of you tired.

He bit back a smile, watching as you slowly closed your eyes. He knew you were extremely drunk, he could see that in the way exhaust took over you. Not only you had a lot of alcohol in your system, but you’ve also had some long couple of days, and some longer ones were ahead of you until you knew for a fact the world was safe once more.

“I don’t know how it is, that you’re the one person who actually makes me feel... soft.” He confessed, watching your lips curve into a smile at his words, “You... drunken idiot.”

“I regret nothing.” You said proudly, as Five couldn’t help but let out a small laugh, softly stroking your hair to help you fall asleep sooner.

“We’ll see about that in the morning.” He smirked amused, watching as you pouted.

“You never gave me an answer, you know.” You pointed out, letting his soft touch calm you down, as you felt sleep slowly take over you.

“You never gave me a question.” He retorted, knowing for sure that if your eyes were opened, you would roll them at him.

“I think you like to hear me say that I am in love with you, it’s the third time I have to say it.” You said, slowly placing your hands under your pillow, making yourself more comfortable.

“I am happy to see that you still know how to count.” Five said, placing some wild strands of hair behind your ear.

“Screw you.” You said, making him grin, as he went back to stroking your hair.

“In this whole... shitty situation I managed to get myself into, you, Y/N, might as well be the only thing keeping me sane... surprisingly.” Five frowned at the last bit, watching as you opened your eyes, shifting your head to watch him, “I love you too, moron.”

“I never said I love you.” You smirked, teasing him as he rolled his eyes.

“You little chipmunk...” Five sighed, shaking his head in disbelief amused, as you leaned into his touch more, closing your eyes, pleased with yourself.

“Yeah, but you still love me.” You said, not once dropping that smirk on your lips.

“You’re impossible, did you know that?” He wondered, resting his forearm on the couch beside you, as he knelt on the floor, trying to make himself more comfortable, noticing the way you were enjoying the scalp massage... for free.

“A little bit.” You slowly shrugged, wrapping your arms around his, once you felt it beside you.

Five watched with a soft smile as you pulled his arms closer to your face, nuzzling into it with a satisfied smile, happy that you listened to your friends.

And deep down, so was Five thanking his siblings.

[neverknewgrey2016]

First

Okay, so I know this is bad. I wrote it while at work, and it is rushed and I suck. But @gamerwoo​ has been encouraging me to write again, so here is something I threw together. It is based off of a song, but I’ll put it at the bottom of the fic.

Warnings: fluff, angst, if you squint a bit of crack, I don’t wanna give away too much, but if there is something you think needs to be on here, let me know and I will add it.  

Characters: WonwooxReader, MingyuxReader

Words: 1278

Summary: It’s your wedding day and Wonwoo can’t help but think back on certain memories between you guys. 

Wonwoo stood at the altar awaiting your arrival just like everyone else. To say he was anxious was an understatement. It was your wedding day, and he could barely contain his emotions. Any moment now and you would walk through those doors, and walk to the altar where he already stood.

His eyes scanned the hall that was filled with your friends and family. a small smile tugging on his lips as he thought about when you had first met.

~~~~~~

"Guys, this is y/n, they are an exchange student, and my new lab partner.” One of Wonwoo’s friends introduced you. Now, Wonwoo didn't believe in love at first sight, but when he saw you, he knew you would be significant to him.

"Hi, it's nice to meet you," He gave a polite bow, only a little shy ... yeah, only a little.

With a wide smile gracing your face and you bowed back with a similar greeting. And that was the end of it for Wonwoo. Two minutes into meeting you, and he was smitten, barely even paying attention to the conversation that continued.

“What happened to your last lab partner?” Another friend asked.

“We had, uh, some differences. He liked his eyebrows, and maybe I mixed the wrong solutions and he now no longer has any.”

~~~~~~

Wonwoo snapped back to reality when the doors opened, and you made your entrance. All eyes went to you, but your eyes were only on one. Love and adoration was written all over your face. It was clear this was the happiest moment of your life thus far. Wonwoo smiled brightly as you walked towards him. His heart raced seeing you looking ethereal. You really did have that wedding glow about you.

He thought about how these were the last few moments before you were no longer considered single, despite being in a relationship for years. He wasn’t sure if he should savor them or not. Your eyes locked with his, and another memory popped in his head.

~~~~~

He was sitting on the roof of a random apartment during a party when you came and joined him.

You sat next to him where he had been stargazing.

“Whatcha doing?” You asked, handing him a drink. He smiled at you, accepting the offer.

“Just needed to catch my breath. Parties aren’t really my thing.” You giggled and nodded.

“Yeah, mine either.” You replied. You both sat in a comfortable silence for a few moments.

“How are you feeling?” He asked you, turning his head to look at you. You turned yours at the same time, faces inches apart. Your eyes locking with each other. Maybe it was because it was only the two of you there, the feeling of being in a completely different world with a party raging in the background, or if it was the twinkling stars surrounding you both, but the atmosphere was that of a perfect movie scene.

“I-” You take a deep breath, so much had happened in just a few months, and you hadn’t had time to talk much to Wonwoo. “I’m so happy.” When you said this, Wonwoo couldn’t help but compare your smile to the brightness of the stars. Of course your smile beat the stars without any competition. The feeling Wonwoo had at your words was something he couldn’t express. But he smiled at your words. You being happy made him happy.

“I’m glad.”

~~~~~~

Wonwoo’s heart started racing even faster, if it were possible, the closer you got to the front of the room. It was so close. You were about to be married.

He felt a hand on his back, a pat from a friend. Soonyoung, a groomsman. Soonyoung gave him an all too well knowing look.

~~~~~

“I am screwed.” Wonwoo said as he walked into his friend's dorm.

“Hey Hosh, how are you? I’m good, and you?” Soonyoung sassed before turning to face Wonwoo. He paused as he took in his friend. “What happened?”

“I’m in love.” Wonwoo said, rubbing his face with his hands.

“Isn’t that supposed to be a good thing?” Sonnyoung laughed at the expression he received from the taller boy.

“Yeah, it is.” He replied shaking his head.

~~~~~~

Wonwoo forced his smile to stay on his face as you stepped up in front of his best friend, Mingyu. An all to familiar pang in his chest returning as you smiled brightly at your soon-to-be husband. For years he knew this would happen. He remembered that the same day you met, after you left, Mingyu turned to him and said ‘I’m gonna marry them someday.’. And as Wonwoo stood behind Mingyu as his best man, it would be impossible to say he was wrong all those years ago.

He had been there throughout your entire relationship. At first, he thought you were just another one of Mingyu’s crushes, until he realized you weren’t.

~~~~~~

“You know, Hyung, I really like Y/n.” Mingyu rambled on, not even paying attention to the homework in front of them. Wonwoo just nodded along, nothing he hasn’t heard before from his younger friend. Mingyu always ‘really liked’ someone. Always fell hard and fast, but the flame would burn bright and die out just as quickly. Wonwoo thought this time was no different, except so many things about this time were different. Never had Mingyu and himself liked the same person before.

“I- I really think I may be in love with Y/n…” Wonwoo’s eyes shot up. Mingyu was never a player, but he never used the L word. Let alone the ‘in L” word.

“What makes them different from everyone else?” He asked.

“What doesn’t?” Answered the other boy. And as much as Wonwoo hated to admit it, Mingyu wasn’t wrong.

~~~~~~

Of course Wonwoo never said anything. He never would. This was his best friend, he would never cross that line… outside of his head anyway. But he would never act on anything or try to sabotage your relationship with Mingyu. So, whatever those moments may have been, or those fleeting glances may have meant, they were nothing now. He was never going to ask you, not that he ever wanted to know the answer anyway. Because deep down he knew the answer. You were just as sickeningly in love with Mingyu as he was with you.

~~~~~

“Hyung, I have a question for you.” Mingyu said, sipping his drink. He had asked to meet up. It had been hard to do since they were no longer roommates and no longer young college kids.

“What’s up?” Wonwoo asked, taking a sip of his own drink.

“Would you be my best man?” Wonwoo froze, “I’ve asked Y/n to marry me, and I can’t imagine anyone standing behind me as my best man besides you.” And despite his heart shattering into millions of pieces, he couldn't say no.

~~~~~~

Though as you and Mingyu both said your “I do’s”, Wonwoo couldn’t help but think about how maybe in a different life, you and him would have worked, but in this life, the life you were in, he would never try.

He watched as you and your now husband shared your first kiss as a married couple before walking out of the hall, hand in hand with matching smiles, part of him was so happy for his best friend. But the other part was jealous.

Through his forced smile and the real happiness he felt for his best friend and person he was in love with being together and happy, he couldn’t stop part of him from thinking about the worst part of it all.

You would have loved him, if you met him first.

(The song this is based off of If You Met Me First)

[that-house]

Viego Rant (villainy and character design and tragedy and all that jazz)

Introduction The more I think about Viego, League of Legends’ newest character, the more enamored I am with him as a villain (unrelated to his general sexiness, though that does tie in with what makes him such a good villain).

I’ve seen a lot of complaints about his design. The Ruined King, one of the greatest threats in Runeterra, the progenitor of the Shadow Isles, the lord of the undead, is finally released as a playable champion and he looks like this:

People were expecting another Mordekaiser (who is similarly an undead king with a ghost army), a lich-tyrant clad in iron, decayed flesh peeling from an aged face. What we got was an angsty anime prettyboy, and it was infinitely better than the alternatives. 

Lore Viego isn’t a conquering king. While his combat abilities are indeed badass, his personality is far from it. He’s a whiny brat and that’s incredible. He isn’t bent on world domination. His character arc revolves around just how human, how fallible he really is. For those unfamiliar with his lore, I’ll paraphrase it here:

Viego was the second son of a great king. Overshadowed by his brother and with no expectations upon him and near-limitless wealth, he wandered around being an idiot fuckboy for the vast majority of his formative years. Disaster struck when his brother died in an accident, and Viego took the throne with no training, no experience, and no desire to be king. He was a shitty king. The worst king. Just all-around apathetic. Gave zero shits. Can you blame him? It’s a lot of responsibility to be thrust upon someone who isn’t much more than a child, and with no preparation. He didn’t care about anything, that is, until he met Isolde. She was a poor seamstress, but he fell in love with her upon their first meeting. Together they ruled the country but it was really just them staring longingly into each others’ eyes. His allies were kinda fucking pissed about that, and one day an assassin came from Viego. The assassin fucked up and stabbed Isolde instead, and the poison on the blade made her fall gravely ill. As she lay in her bed, slowly dying, Viego went mad seeking a cure. He ravaged the land seeking any knowledge that might help, pouring all of his money into finding an antidote. He failed. As a last resort, he brought Isolde’s body to the Blessed Isles, a place rumored to be able to resurrect the dead. It worked, to an extent. Isolde’s wraith, confused, afraid, and angry at being ripped from the peace of death, unthinkingly stabbed Viego in the chest with his own magic sword, creating basically a magic nuke that turned the Blessed Isles into the domain of the undead. Viego resurrected as the king of the Shadow Isles some time later, having totally forgotten that Isolde killed him. He controls a big-ass ghost army, could probably beat up any living thing in a fight, and has evil ghost magic. Now this stupid simp wants his wife back and if he has to kill every living thing on Runeterra, well, anything for his queen. He’s even a tier 3 sub to her Twitch.

Music His musical theme isn’t some heavy metal anthem or intense cinematic piece (unlike the Pentakill song named after his sword, Blade of the Ruined King). It’s mostly sad and slow, almost sinister, with a piano and a music box. It has its loud moments featuring violins and choral bits like any villainous music, but the song is mostly subtle. It is a banger though.

In the comments section of this video, someone pointed out that the music reflects his story from beginning to end:

Everything about this champion is so well done. Riot Games really outdid themselves on this one. Bravo, encore please.

Motivation While the Mordekaiser circlejerkers on r/LeagueofLegends won’t shut the fuck up about how powerful Mordekaiser is, Viego is the better villain. Mordekaiser may be a bigger threat to all life on Runeterra, but Viego is a better character. (There’s a guy on my League discord server who won’t shut up about Mordekaiser so forgive me for being pissed at Morde stans).

Mordekaiser is motivated by a desire for control, to rule the world. Viego is motivated by obsession and misplaced love. There aren’t a lot of Mordekaisers on Earth. Supervillains are rare in real life. But Viego’s motivations are a lot closer to home. People in positions of power that they don’t deserve can do a lot of harm (for example: Trump).

He’s a grieving husband who was never prepared to deal with anything more difficult than choosing what wine to drink with dinner, who is trying to get his wife back because the world had always complied to his every whim. He’s a funky mix between a truly hopeless romantic and a spoiled brat throwing a temper tantrum.

Obsession is scary. It’s a real-world emotional state that’s been the cause of a lot of murders over mankind’s history. In contrast, Mordekaiser’s cartoonish Genghis Khan XXL schtick isn’t something that we encounter often. Of course a superpowered ultradictator would be worse for the world, but if you give ultimate power to a random person, you’re more likely to get someone like Tighten from Megamind. Or, more relevantly, Viego.

Design His design is sexy and stupid, just like him. He wears an open shirt into battle and wields his sword like an idiot (I’ve seen all the rants about how that’s not how that sword is meant to be used) because he was never really a warrior. Even at his most violent, right before the end of his mortal life, he didn’t do much combat himself, leaving his military endeavors to his underlings. Even now that he’s essentially a god, he still has a colossal wraith army that causes far more devastation than he ever could personally.

Despite his slim build (by League of Legends standards), he easily wields his colossal sword because of the strength of his state of undeath. Like his political power when he was alive, his posthumous magical and physical powers were never something he sought out, they were just given to him by circumstance.

The big cool-ass triangle hole in his chest where Isolde stabbed him is the source of the Black Mist, which is evil ghost mist that ebbs and flows from the Shadow Isles, bringing with it hordes of the undead. The sadder Viego is, the more Mist he creates. Poetically, his invasion of the world is inspired by his sorrow at his wife’s death and enabled by his wife’s reluctance to return to him. His story is perfectly reflected by his design.

Isolde Isolde’s spirit took up residence inside a young Senna (who’s another League champion, not particularly important here). This led to some Black Mist-related shenanigans and at least for the time being, Senna uses Isolde’s power to fight off the servants of Viego which threaten all life on Runeterra.

It seems pretty clear that whatever love Isolde felt for Viego is gone by now. Whether or not she ever loved him or was just unable to say no to the king is up for debate, but I’d like to believe there was something there. In my opinion, Viego’s story hits harder if they really were a great couple at first, torn apart by circumstance and obsession.

Much like the Maiden of the Woods in that one comic that circulates around here, to whom the knight gave his heart and she was like “yo what the fuck i literally never asked you to do this,” Viego went a little too far in trying to save her. They may have once been happy, but the Ruined King ruined his own life, too.

Unless Isolde is a lot less morally decent than we’ve been led to believe, I doubt she can forgive all the massacring that her husband’s been doing lately. In the recent cinematic, she was shown to be pretty anti-Viego. Maybe she’ll get a bastardization arc, but it certainly seems unlikely.

All of Season 2021 is based around Viego, Isolde, and the Shadow Isles, so we’ll just have to see what comes next. It’s possible that we’ll get Isolde as a playable champion, which should clear a lot of things up.

Final Thoughts Unlike so many villains, he’s not fueled by rage or hatred, but rather by sorrow. He’s stuck in his past, unable to move on. He regrets the actions of his life but is set on his course now. The sunk-cost fallacy comes into play here; he’s put so much time and effort and blood into bringing back Isolde, that turning away from it would feel to him like an insult, not only to her but to the innocent lives he’s taken in her name.

His tale is a tragedy, a love story gone horrifically wrong. Viego has suffered throughout his thousand-year life. Despite this, he’s undoubtedly the villain. His permanent death would be a net positive for the world. In has rage and grief he’s destroyed multiple civilizations, and will burn down the world to get Isolde back.

His heart may be in the wrong place, but it’s in a very human place. I don’t think he’ll get the ending he’s looking for, but I hope he finds some closure in the end.