#transgender Hawke

[kittyoperas]

What if we were two transmasculine apostates in love.... What then.

[shrkichigo]

Happy trans day of visibility from class 1a !

And the league of villains

[karmic-vibes]

If I Can Dream

8 - Oh Why Can’t My Dream Come True

art credit: @lazylittledragon on tumblr and lazyjunebug on twitter

cw: gender dysphoria, misuse of pronouns, use of deadname

Year: 1988

“They’re gonna freak out,” Eddie panicked.

“No they won’t,” Steve assured.

“They’re gonna call me a girl,” he hissed.

“And I’ll yell at them, then we’ll leave. You’re my boyfriend and soon-to-be husband, alright? I’m not gonna let them walk all over you.”

“If you say so.”

“Oh, hello boys. What brings you here?” he asked.

“Oh, hello boys. What brings you here?” he asked.

“Off to a good start,” Steve whispered. “Hi, dad. We, uh… we actually had some news we wanted to share with you guys.”

“Alright, what is it?”

“For starters, we’re getting married.”

“Oh, congratulations!” Pattie cheered, forcing the two of them into a hug.

“How, uh… how exactly does that work?” John asked.

“Well…” Steve looked to Eddie, seeking his approval before continuing. He gave him a nod and a reassuring rub on the back. “Since Eddie is still legally considered a female, we’re able to get married. When we go to change his last name, he’ll finally be changing his first one too.”

“About time,” John said.

“You’re telling me,” Eddie dryly chuckled.

“So what else?” Pattie asked.

“Hmm?” Steve hummed.

“You said ‘for starters’—what else is there?”

“Well…” They looked the each other, fear filling their eyes. “We’re, um… uh…”

“For Christ’s sake, we’re having a baby,” Eddie rushed out.

Pattie and John stood there catching flies. Their eyes bulged out of their head, not quite sure how to take the news.

“Okay, not everyone speak all at once, god,” Steve said.

“I… are you sure?” Pattie asked.

“Yeah, we’re sure.”

“Okay, but how sure?”

“I took an at home test and just got my blood work done. So… pretty sure…”

“Wow… John?”

His father didn’t answer. Instead, he pushed past the boys and made his way to the study. Pattie rolled her eyes and chased after her husband.

“Told you so,” Eddie said.

“Not the time, Munson. Mom, dad?” Steve called.

“What?” Pattie sighed.

“We just… we thought you guys would be happy. You know… grandkids, yay…”

“Steven, we put up with this whole charade you made us put on for your girlfriend–“

“Whoa–“

“I am not done speaking, Steven. You make us relearn a name, address her by some ridiculous new pronouns. We can accept the two of you getting married, since legally we can’t stop you. But having a child? No, absolutely not. You two as parents? Please. It’s an unfit household.”

“How, dad? Hmm? How are we unfit to be parents?”

“A child needs a mom and a dad. Not a dad and a fucking tranny.”

“Yeah, because a mom and a dad did me so fucking well. We’re done here. Let’s go.”

Steve grabbed onto Eddie’s wrist and practically dragged him out of the house. He opened Eddie’s door for him and shut it once he was fully in the car. Even when he was heated beyond belief, he always took the time to treat Eddie the way he deserved. Especially now that they had a child on the way, he always found a reason to calm himself down.

Without realizing, Steve was driving with his mind on autopilot. Despite not being scheduled to work that day, he found himself pulling into the Family Video lot. When it clicked, he blinked aimlessly a few times and profusely apologized to Eddie.

“No, no, it’s okay, honey. Let’s get a movie or something while we’re here and say hi to Robin.”

“Yeah, okay…”

“We don’t have to tell her yet if you don’t want.”

“No, no I do. Sorry, my parents put me in a bad mood.”

“I know, it’s okay.”

Steve got out, rushing over to get Eddie’s door for him. He helped him out and the two stood outside the door, trying to silently reassure each other before heading inside. As Eddie reached for the door, Steve grabbed his waist and pulled him in for a sweet kiss.

The two caught Robin’s eye as she was processing some returns. She raised a brow and leaned over the counter, waiting for the two to walk in. They mumbled something incoherent to each other before Steve opened the door for Eddie.

“Long time, no see, boys. How’re we doing today?”

“Good,” Eddie smiled. “How’re you, Rob?”

“I’m good,” she said, glancing over at Steve. “Are you hiding something from me, Harrington? You’re usually talking my ear off.”

“Can we talk in the back, Rob?”

“Sure… everything okay?”

“Yeah, just come on.”

The friends dipped into the cramped back room as Eddie wandered around looking for a movie for the night. Robin leaned against the door as Steve hopped onto the desk with a huff.

“What’s really going on?”

“What do you mean?”

“Something’s up. What’s going on?”

“Sorry, we just got back from my parents’ house.”

“Ah. Any reason you were there?”

“Do I need a reason to visit my parents?” Robin raised a brow and crossed her arms. “Yeah, okay, you got me there.” Steve buried his face in his hands. “Eddie’s pregnant…”

“Holy shit, what? How?”

“We weren’t careful and uh… yeah. He’s pregnant. Just about two months, now.”

“Wow… so, you’re gonna be a dad?”

“I know…”

“What the hell‽”

“I know!”

“Jesus… how does Eddie feel about the whole thing?”

“He’s nervous, understandably. I’m more nervous for his mental state, y’know?”

“Why?”

“Rob, he’s worked so hard getting where he is. He’s come out to me, to everyone we know, dealt with the backlash, went through the agony of top surgery, and now… after all that… he’s pregnant… it’s like two steps forward and three steps back. I feel terrible.”

“Steve, he loves you and I’m sure he’s happy to do this for you. If he weren’t, I’m sure he’d bring up the idea of getting rid of it. I think he’ll be okay.”

“I just worry.”

“And you have every right to worry! It just means you’re a good boyfriend.”

“Fiancé,” he corrected.

“Jesus, Harrington, I don’t see you for a week and you come in here saying you’re gonna be a dad and a husband!”

“I know, crazy, huh?”

“Where does all the time go, Christ…”

“What do you mean?” Steve chuckled.

“Steve, three years ago, when we met at Scoops, you and Ed had only been dating for like six or seven months. Both unsure what you’d be doing with each of your futures. Now here you are, nearly college graduates, engaged, and future dads. It’s insane!”

“Yeah, I guess it is…”

“I’m happy for you.”

“Thanks, Rob. That means a lot.”

“Of course, dingus. I’ll always be happy for you.”

“Thanks,” Steve chortled. “I should go check on the husband. Lord knows what he’s getting into.”

“Probably ruining all my hard work from this morning,” Robin teased.

“I wouldn’t put it past him.”

As if I’m cue, as the friends emerged from the back room, Eddie had tripped over one of the displays Robin had spent all morning setting up. She pinched the bridge of her nose, motioning for Steve to collect his man.

“Sorry,” Eddie started. “Pregnancy brain is already getting to me.”

“I figured. Congrats, by the way.”

“Thanks, Robin…” Eddie blushed as Steve helped him up. “Uh, Stevie, how do you feel about a horror movie?”

“Depends which one.”

“Nightmare on Elm?”

“Ed, we’ve watched that a million times.”

“Yeah, your point?”

“God, I hate you. Fine, we’ll rent it again, but I’m getting something too.”

“Fine by me. I’ll be right back,” he said, setting the tape down on the counter.

“Where’re you running off to?” Steve asked.

“If you must know, Steven, I feel like I’m about to puke my guts out. Happy?”

“Dear lord. Call me if you need anything.” Eddie gave him a thumbs up as he headed to the Staff Only bathroom.

“So, what’re you gonna make him sit through?” Robin asked.

“A birthing video. He wants horror, I’ll give him horror.”

“You sure that’s a good idea?”

“Why not? We both need to be prepared.”

“If you say so.”

Later that night, after the boys had dinner and finished watching Nightmare on Elm Street, Steve surprised Eddie with the birthing video. At first, Eddie was reluctant to watch it, especially so soon, but he eventually caved and let Steve pop the tape in.

The tape started out as rather informational, going through the different stages of labor and what to expect in each. What neither of them were anticipating, was it cutting to a woman actually pushing a child out of her.

“Can result in a severe hemorrhage, which could lead to death in minutes,” the narrator droned.

Eddie and Steve sat back on the couch, clutching their thighs to their chests, mouths hanging open with eyes popped out of the skulls.

“Steven, why did you make me watch that‽”

“I don’t know!”

“Was that meant to be comforting‽”

“I don’t know!”

“Oh my god, a human is going to be coming out of me!” Eddie panicked. “This is all your fault, Harrington!”

“What is‽”

“First knocking me up, then showing me that video!”

“I’m sorry!”

“Ugh!” Eddie fell back on the couch, dragging a blanket with him. He cocooned himself in the couch’s throw, only allowing his eyes to pop out. “This kid better be worth it.”

“She will be.”

“I hate you, Harrington.”

“I know you do, Munson…” Steve sighed as he rubbed his fiancé’s back. “I know you do…”

[montcraftrose]

Zomicz is on TikTok!

(Made around January 16, 2024)

[blueberrybunic]

hawks // transmasc

like/rb & credit if using ; requested by 🎭🎧

[x-letsbreaksomerules-x]

don’t mind them they’re busy

[chronicroderick]

Cowboys

A poem by chronicroderick

Rugged man,

Is that me?

Standing there on the screen.

Blood red horizon behind me.

Crows circling overhead.

I call my lover by any other name,

My friend.

My pal.

My buddy.

Are those words a betrayal to my kind?

Am I doing a disservice to my brethren?

Do I owe them... anything?

My love is mine after all,

Mine all mine.

It's more beautiful when it's painful,

That's what I tell myself,

As dysfunctional as it is..

I see the grotesque reflection of myself in a man who can't say what he means.

Unless it's in the quiet nights alone together

Whispering,

Trying to forget,

Pretending to not remember,

Until you look into my eyes and you see the dog you left behind,

Patiently awaiting your return,

Biting at the hand that feeds me.

At the hand that pets me.

At the hand that holds the leash.

But I am no dog,

So I wander the desert in the night.

I sleep in the arroyo in the day.

Railroad tracks cross me,

Lizards and coyotes too.

I am the sand in my own boots.

The sunburn on my own cheeks.

I'm the coveting of a secret twinkling of an eye.

A look.

A lingering palm.

That is my penance.

That is my love.

[murdermitties]

Looks around,, hawkfrost with the mlm flag? [or just the rainbow flag if you'd prefer that!!]

Or maybe aro/ace dovewing

alts & blank

[whiskrs]

Childhood:

But this time as a girl 🥳🥰

[vanillaearwig]

I ❤ Queer Birds!! 🏳️‍🌈🦅

[karmic-vibes]

If I Can Dream

9 - There Must Be Peace and Understanding

art credit: @lazylittledragon on tumblr and lazyjunebug on twitter

cw: gender dysphoria, self-loathing, implied parental neglect

Year: 1988

“Steve, get off!” Eddie whined.

“No! I wanna feel her move!”

“Jesus Christ.”

Eddie reclined back in his bundle of pillows on the armrest of the couch as Steve rested his head on Eddie’s baby bump. While Eddie had only felt the flutters a few times (and barely, at that), Steve was determined to feel the baby move. Eddie insisted that he wouldn’t be able to, but Steve was never one to shy away from a challenge.

“Are you gonna stay there forever, Steven?” Eddie teased.

“Mhmm,” he smiled, hugging himself closer to his partner.

“You’re not gonna feel her. I barely feel her, for Christ’s sake.”

“Don’t care.”

“Well, I have to pee, so you’re gonna have to move soon.”

“What if I just move to the bathroom with you.”

“You’re ridiculous.”

“Well, forgive me, Edward, for showering our unborn child with unconditional love.”

“And you can keep doing that after I pee. Get up.”

“But Eds,” he whined.

“Steven Michael Harrington, for the sake of your child and my bladder, get off.”

“Fine,” he sighed, sitting up on the couch.

“Christ almighty, thank you.”

Eddie swung his legs off the couch as made his way to the bathroom. While the baby was still unbelievably tiny, she had no problem abusing Eddie’s bladder.

“God, she’s gonna be the death of me,” Eddie sighed.

“You’re nearly halfway there, though.”

“I’m barely fifteen weeks, Stevie.”

“Yeah, nearly halfway!”

“I wish I had your optimism.”

“Oh, come on, it’s not that bad.”

“Says the one who can still drink and smoke.”

“You’re right, sorry, sorry…”

Eddie sat back on the couch with a sigh, falling onto Steve’s lap. He began pushing his hair back as Eddie got cozy underneath a blanket. The couple sat in content silence before Steve heard Eddie sniffling.

“You okay, Eds?”

“What if she doesn’t love me?” he whispered.

“Where’d that come from?” Steve asked.

“What if I don’t love her?”

“That’s ridiculous.”

“Is it, though? Parents don’t love their kids all the time… I know that… and so do you, Steve.”

“But we’re not our parents, Ed. We’re going to love our little girl more than life itself.”

“You’re right… I’m sorry. I hate myself for even thinking of it.”

“Stop it…”

“What?”

“Do you even realize what you’re doing? Like, genuinely?”

“What do you mean?”

“Ed, you’re growing a person inside you. Like an entire human being. You’re giving up your body for our little girl to be here. You’re making such a huge mental sacrifice doing this. I know I sure as shit could never do what you’re doing. You need to go easy on yourself and realize all that you’re doing, Eddie. Okay? I get it, your hormones are all over the place, your brain is mush, and I don’t even know how you haven’t fallen into a complete pit of despair with your gender dysphoria.”

“Trust me, I’m getting there.”

“Point is: go easy on yourself, okay? You’re doing something most people couldn’t, alright? But you’re doing it, Ed. It’s okay to overthink. It’s okay to feel shitty now and then. But at the end of the day, you’re going to be the best dad this world has ever seen.” Eddie scoffed. “I mean it… and you know you can come to me if you’re struggling. This isn’t easy and you shouldn’t feel like you have to go at it alone. I’m here for you. I always will be.”

“You promise?”

“I swear.”

A few weeks passed and Eddie’s mood swings were still all over the place. Steve consoled him without complaint every single time and Eddie could not have been more grateful. Eventually, by the skin of their teeth, they were preparing for their community college graduation. Steve was getting his associates in advertising and marketing communications as well as social work, while Eddie was getting his in music theory.

The two were showering each other in compliments, seeing each other in graduation attire at the same time. They couldn’t believe they did it. Between becoming engaged, Eddie getting pregnant, and starting to house hunt, they were in disbelief at what they were able to accomplish.

“I’m so proud of you,” Steve whispered as Eddie straighten out his tie.

“Proud of me? Stevie, I’m proud of you. You’ve dealt and put up with all my shit. I can’t imagine the weight on your shoulders.”

“Ed, you can’t be serious.”

“Well, I am.”

“It’s not a big deal for me to help and support you. I love being able to do that for you. You’re the one that’s pregnant. You’re the one that’s struggled with school your whole life. To see you come this far… it truly leaves me speechless.”

“I love you…”

“I love you too, Eds. I also love seeing your little bump in your graduation gown.”

“Thanks. I think she looks cute in there.”

“She definitely does.”

“So you really think we’re having a girl?” Eddie asked.

“I do. I don’t think I was meant to have any sons.”

“Why do you say that?”

“I don’t know. I just don’t think they’d ever be able to compare to Dustin. It wouldn’t be fair.”

“Oh, please, you would love them regardless.”

“Yeah, but I feel like I’d love a little girl even more.”

“You’re gonna be a great dad no matter what we have.”

“Thanks, Ed.”

“Of course. Let’s get going, Robin and Wayne and waiting for us to pick them up.”

After the ceremony, that Steve’s parents couldn’t bother to attend, Wayne wrapped both boys in tight hugs. Each boy got their own bundle of flowers that Wayne had put together with Robin’s help. Robin snapped pictures of everyone throughout the whole day. She figured it was the last milestone for each of them as “single” men.

“So, when’re you’re graduating, Buckley?” Wayne asked.

“I still have another two years at Indiana State, so… two years.”

“Well, we’ll all be there cheering you on when the day comes.”

“Including my little niece,” Robin beamed.

“Why does everyone think it’s a girl,” Eddie chuckled.

“Because, it’s so obvious, you guys are gonna be girl dads.”

“But Munson’s only have boys. Right, Wayne?”

“I don’t know, I think it’s about time we had a girl.”

“Why do you even care? Do you want a boy?” Robin asked.

“Gender is nothing but a social construct. I could care less what we have. I’m just trying to figure out how everyone landed on the ‘Eddie’s having a girl’ train.”

“Wait, if Munson’s only have boys, then how do you explain your dead self?” Steve asked.

“I’m still a boy, aren’t I?”

“Oh, yeah, fair point.”

“Speaking of, Wayne,” Eddie started. “Did you always know I was a boy?”

“I had a feeling,” he shrugged. “You never really seemed like a girl, y’know? Between the way you dressed and carried yourself—none of it was ever really feminine.”

“So you weren’t shocked when I told you?”

“God, no, not at all.”

“Were you?” Eddie nudged Steve.

“A little. To be fair, Wayne has known you your whole life. We had only been dating for six months. It’s kind of different.”

“You were so sweet when I told you,” Eddie gushed.

“Was I really?”

“Absolutely!” Eddie wrapped his arms around Steve’s neck and started playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. “Your first instinct was to tell me you love me and unbind me because my bandage was cutting into me. I hadn’t even noticed anymore, yet it didn’t even phase you. It was better than any reaction I could have–“

“What was that?” Steve interrupted, glancing down.

“The baby kicked.”

“Oh my god…” Steve teared up. “I felt her… I felt her!”

“You can actually feel that? It seems like she’s barely nudging me.”

“I felt her, Eds, and oh my god, it’s amazing.” Steve placed one of his hands on Eddie’s abdomen and started crying. “There’s a baby in there.”

“Yeah, Steve, I’m aware,” Eddie chuckled.

“Our baby… holy shit…”

[bestboyseri]

[woadge]

Worlds most depressed superhero

[wackyw0rkbench]

doodle page

[strixhaven]

seriously though never have i seen a man so bisexual-looking and beautiful as garret hawke in the mage champion armor. they should’ve just stopped with video game protagonists after that he’s the only one that’ll ever matter. we’re never getting a man hotter than this

[louisironson]

trans woman hawkeye fic got me crying in the club

not mine just a fan of it. like a lot. yeehaw