#travis and nick are just waiting for them at home on the other side as madison leaves the earthly plane

[alicentflorent]

If FTWD had revealed Madison had died when she was shot and she actually what we see of her after is her in the afterlife or a pre-death dream sequence. And the story strand tells Tracy about Madison surviving the shot and saving padre is just to save 8 year old Tracy from the trauma of being a murderer. Making her believe that she inspired Madison to save padre from her fathers horde (which also may be causing her to feel guilt), I’m an attempt to make her believe in goodness and remembering “grandma” Madison in a more positive light.

I mean.. about it, she is reunited with Alicia, who is healthy now and for the record, she should have died on the beach - it makes sense given that Alicia wakes up looking healthy and feeling healthy and once again the colours are brightened as she goes off to help others. Then when we see them watching from above, that part is real and we are actually seeing the other characters alive and well. Madison and Alicia were just seeing that everyone is going to be okay before they move on. When strand sees them he’s seeing their spirits or imagining them. Their journey home to LA is actually their journey to a version of heaven/peace. It also fits in this story, bc they alluded to an afterlife / near death dream when nick died and when grace almost died, but her baby actually died instead. Anyways this is just my stupid thoughts on how to make the finale less of a dumpster fire. I spent too much time on thinking of ways to improve bad storylines.

[mikeisthricedeceased]

You’re My Home 4

Catfish x OC

Part 4: Movement

Word Count: ~7.2k

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Warnings: Smut 18+, oral (f & m receiving), fluff, Nita and Frankie being corny as fuck, hints of a suit kink?

A/N: I’m sorry this took so damn long. My brain has been pretty fried these past few months. Hopefully, this was worth the wait.

Summary: Frankie goes to Nita’s place for the first time. They get interrupted in the middle of something. Frankie learns a few things about himself, and they get to make up for a few things they’ve missed out on since they started dating.

AO3 | Masterlist

~*~*~*~

“You know, I’ve lived here for a while and it still surprises me how fucking big Travis County is,” Frankie said, tapping his fingers as he looked out at the houses they drove past. “Are we still in Austin?”

“Honey, we’ve only been driving for twenty minutes.” She glanced over at him with a smile. “We’re still in Austin.”

He shrugged, unable to prevent a little smile of his own. “I just don’t think I’ve ever really come this way. Nothing looks familiar and it’s throwing me off.”

Nita hummed. “And I thought you drove all over for your supply transports. Figured you’d know the county like the back of your hand.”

“Nah. I go to maybe five different places total,” he said with a chuckle. “They occasionally throw in somewhere new, but I can’t say I’ve had to drive past many mansions.”

“I don’t believe that for a second. Everything’s bigger in Texas,” she said matter-of-factly.

He turned to look at her again, silently raising an eyebrow until she caught his eye and he watched her fight to keep a straight face.

“I can kick you out of this car, Frankie,” she threatened, but he heard the amused note in her voice.

“Nope. You like me too much.”

“Oh?” She glanced his way, eyes narrowed. “Is that right?”

He pursed his lips. “Maybe. Maybe not. This is the first time I’m visiting your place, so…”

“I swear…” She shook her head as she looked ahead at the road, a smile tugging at her lips.

A grin stayed on his face, even as he turned his attention back out the window. After a few minutes of comfortable silence, he glanced back over at her. “Where are we heading, anyway?” He gestured to the large houses on either side of them with a smirk. “Is one of these yours?”

“No, we’re heading to Spanish Oaks.”

“Spanish Oaks,” he repeated, frowning in concentration. “I’ve heard that somewhere before.”

“Gated community,” Nita supplied, “right around Barton Creek.”

He gave her a surprised look. “Gated? That sounds pretty fancy.”

She shrugged. “Yeah, I guess it is. I think it’s nice. Some of the people in the area are snobs though, which can get frustrating.”

“I can only imagine,” he said, shaking his head.

~*~*~*~

After passing through the main gates into Spanish Oaks, Frankie and Nita got wrapped up in discussing their favorite ABBA songs, which quickly turned into the two of them listing their favorite artists from the 70s, all because they’d caught the tail end of “Dancing Queen” when Nita turned the radio up a bit.

The discussion also distracted Frankie to the point that he hadn’t been paying attention to much outside of the car until Nita parked in her driveway and they were both getting out.

“I’m just saying, I like Billy Joel just as much as the next person, and I will absolutely sing along to “Piano Man” whenever I hear it, but I have to go with Stevie Nicks,” he stated, brows raised. “Fleetwood Mac has been my go-to for pretty much my whole life.”

Nita shut her door behind her and went to open the back. “Alright, I completely understand that. Now, just consider—” she held up a hand as she paused. “Stevie Wonder.”

Frankie pursed his lips thoughtfully, lifting his hat to scratch at his forehead. “Well, shit.”

“Exactly!”

He just snorted and shook his head at her. “Yeah, yeah.”

Nita slung his duffle bag over her shoulder and pushed the door closed with her hip. As she walked back around the car, she looked over to find Frankie staring up at the house.

“What?” she asked.

He blinked incredulously. “This is where you live?”

She frowned. “Yes. Why?”

“Nita, this is a mansion,” he told her, shifting his wide eyes to her.

“I don’t know about that,” she said. “It’s a big house, but I don’t know if it qualifies as a mansion.”

“It’s a mansion.”

With a sigh, she started making her way to the front door. Frankie took another second to gaze at the house before he was following her.

“Are you the only one that lives here?” he asked as she unlocked the door and pushed it open.

“Yep. Just me.” She kicked her shoes off onto a mat just inside the door and he did the same. “I’ll have people over for parties or movie nights sometimes. Anyone too tired or drunk to make it home is free to crash in the bedrooms or on the couches. It’s nice when I have guests, y’know?” She made a face. “Even if the clean-up gets a little iffy.”

“Oh? Are those some potential stories I hear?”

Nita flashed him a grin. “They might be. You’ll just have to stick around for a bit to hear them.”

“I don’t think I’ll have any problems with that,” he said, smiling right back.

“Such a flirt,” she mused. “Let me go drop this off in the bedroom really quick.”

He watched her walk down the hall with his duffle bag, leaving him in what he assumed was the living room.

There was one of those big, L-shaped sectionals and two plush looking chairs facing a TV. It was definitely a big space, but it didn’t quite fit what he would’ve expected the inside of a mansion to be like. It wasn’t minimalistic or particularly grandiose. Apart from the sheer amount of space, it was fairly normal. Neat, but still personal, with pictures on the walls and mismatched knick-knacks almost overcrowding the shelves. A stack of mail on the coffee table, next to a little set of coasters. Instead of a tasteful throw, there were what seemed like three different, brightly colored blankets haphazardly folded over the back of the sofa.

It just felt like Nita’s home.

Frankie turned back toward the hall when he heard her coming. She brushed by him as she made her way into the kitchen.

“Do you want a drink or anything?” she asked, opening up the fridge and grabbing a can of ginger ale. “I have Coke, orange soda, some La Croixs, ginger ale.” She turned to him with raised brows.

“I’m fine for right now,” he said, taking the room in as he walked around the bar. “Thanks, though.”

He glanced over at the table, which sat right between the kitchen and the doors that led out to the backyard. There was a nice looking patio area and—

“Is that a pool?”

“No, it’s a flooded half-pipe.”

Frankie shot her a look that made her laugh as she grabbed a glass from one of the cabinets. “Yes, it’s a pool.”

He just shook his head again, shuffling over to the kitchen table. Pulling out one of the chairs, he eased himself down, trying not to bend forward too much as he did so. “We spent all that time in my shitty apartment while you had a place like this.”

“And who’s the one that kept inviting me over?” she said, giving him a look. “Besides, we’re here now.” She walked over to the table and stood in front of him, setting her glass down. She smirked as she cupped his face and bent to kiss his cheek. “So stop whining.”

“I’m not whining,” he huffed, even as he leaned into her kiss.

“Sure.” She pulled his hat off and set it backwards on her own head, moving to peck his lips.

He reached up for the hand on his face, taking hold of her wrist lightly and trailing a thumb over her skin. “I’m not.”

Smiling against his lips, she slid a hand into his hair. “Right.” She was standing between his legs now, eyes shut as she kissed him.

“Sit?” he offered quietly, breaking away to look at her.

Her fingers trailed along his jaw. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

He squeezed her wrist and grinned. “I think I’ll be okay.” His free hand moved up to her hip, pulling her forward.

She scoffed but did nothing to hide the way the corners of her lips rose as she straddled his lap. Both of his hands dropped down to her hips and she scooted closer, not quite pressing flush against his chest.

He rested his forehead against hers, brown eyes warm. “Hey,” he said softly.

“Hi,” she whispered, fingers combing through his hair before she bit her lip. “Y’know, I feel a little stupid for not really putting it together that Frankie is short for Francisco.”

Shifting in the seat a little, he shrugged a shoulder. “Everyone has always just called me Frankie. Or Catfish, after I joined the army.”

She made a face. “God, why did you guys get such shitty nicknames?”

“Fuck you,” he said, chuckling.

She kissed his lips again as she laughed. “At least Jack isn’t as much of a stretch.”

He raised an eyebrow. “That’s not a stretch? Juanita to Juan, Juan to John, John to Jack?”

“It was about the fucking Billy Joel song,” she said with a scoff. “That other shit was just to connect it more to my actual name.” She let her nails drag over his scalp, earning a contented sigh from him. “And I like your name. Francisco sounds nice.”

His face was beginning to feel warm and he had to shift in the chair again.

Nita leaned back, hands leaving his hair and resting on his shoulders as she looked him over, concern in her eyes. “You okay? Was I leaning on your chest too much?”

He shook his head. “No, I’m alright. Just trying to get more comfortable.”

“You sure?” she asked, kneading his shoulders gently.

“Promise,” he said, squeezing her hips. He tilted his head forward, hiding a grin. “I like it when you play with my hair.”

She gave a gruff “necesitado” and moved back into place, running her fingers through his hair once again as they leaned into each other. “You’re lucky you’re so pretty, Francisco.”

Heat spread down his neck and he tightened his hold on her hips to adjust her on his lap, suddenly registering the fact that he was getting hard. He shifted his hands so that his thumbs rested above the waistband of her jeans and brushed her bare skin under her shirt.

She tugged his hair just enough to make him lean back, fixing him with a knowing look. “Now I see why you’re getting restless,” she said with a coy grin. “Don’t get too excited, honey, you’re still healing.”

“My lips aren’t bruised,” he said, pouting slightly for emphasis.

“Mm-hmm,” she hummed, pecking his lips again as she smiled. “You’ve got me there, Francisco.”

They both felt how his cock twitched that time. He glanced down.

Oh.

He looked up to find Nita’s eyes shining mischievously.

Oh.

“Interesting,” she said lowly as his face flushed. “And I thought it was just the hair.” Her grip on his hair tightened a bit and she leaned in to capture his mouth fully, his hands sliding down to hold her thighs. She didn’t press into his chest, but used her elbows on his shoulders to push him against the back of the chair and to steady herself as she slowly rocked her hips.

He groaned, squeezing her thighs and pushing them wider to get her that little bit closer. His instinctive buck up against her shot pain across his ribs, making him grunt softly before he focused on staying still, savoring the way she ground down on his lap.

“You feel so good, Francisco,” she whispered against his mouth, grinding slowly over the erection in his jeans.

His low moan seemed to fill the kitchen, only ending when she deepened the kiss. She trailed her fingers along his scruffy jawline, her tongue brushing his and coaxing more muffled groans out of him as he moved to cup her ass with both hands.

As much as he enjoyed the moments like this, a part of him was already bracing for the inevitable guilt that always showed up before they could get very far. Tension pulled across his shoulders no matter how much he tried to relax them, even as his mouth and hands moved fluidly with her.

“Of all the times to learn a new turn on,” she said, bringing her lips to a spot under his jaw as she tugged his head back further, “had to be while you’re all banged up.”

He let out a wheeze of laughter, eyelids fluttering when her teeth grazed over his pulse.

She scooted back on his lap a fraction, one hand leaving his hair and he made a disappointed sound in the back of his throat.

It was quickly replaced by a sharp gasp when that hand pressed down on his cock, making him jolt in the chair. He let out a gravelly “fuck” and tightened his grip on her.

Frankie could feel her smiling against his neck. A firm squeeze had him moaning her name and shifting his legs wider. She smoothed her hand over him, slowly stroking him through his jeans as she rolled her hips against one of his thighs.

“Good?” she breathed against his throat.

He squeezed her ass again, groaning “Yes.”

She pulled back slightly, giving a satisfied hum, and looked him over. His eyes were closed, brows raised a bit, lips parted. She could see the slight flush on his face and neck, as well as the spot along the side of his neck that was a shade or two darker, right where she’d been focusing her attention.

One of his eyes peeked open, the corner of his mouth lifting. “Be better if you were kissing me again,” he mused.

“You getting mouthy with me, Francisco?” she teased, pressing her hand down on him a little harder.

His eyes squeezed shut again as he held back another moan, voice coming out strained. “Maybe.”

She leaned in again, gently nipping his lower lip. “It’s probably not a good idea to ride you right now,” she whispered into his mouth.

His responding moan was almost pained.

“But,” her hand slowly trailed up from his crotch to his belt buckle, “I can always suck your cock instead.”

“Fuck, Nita,” he breathed, one hand coming up to tangle in her hair and pull her mouth to his in desperation.

It was her turn to moan softly as she relaxed in his hold, fingers still working at his belt. The warmth of his palm where it cradled the back of her head made everything feel molten and electric. His fingers nudged the hat up a little higher on her head.

She’d just gotten his belt undone when they were suddenly jolting apart at the sound of her phone ringing on the counter.

Nita cursed, throwing a glare toward her phone. She turned her attention back to Frankie even as she moved off of his lap, offering him an apologetic look. “I’m sorry. I’ve been waiting for a call about an order that’s supposed to come in today.”

He just gave a dismissive wave, still catching his breath. “It’s fine. I should—” he cleared his throat, running a hand down his face and through his hair, “I should probably take a shower anyway.”

“Okay.” She leaned down to press a softer kiss to his lips. “I am sorry, honey.”

With one last shared look, she turned around and went to snatch up her phone.

Frankie sighed, closing his eyes for a moment and trying to calm his racing heart before standing up to go take that shower.

It was while he was actually in the shower that he realized something. Even though things had ended right around where they usually did, he didn’t feel the lingering cold or heaviness that tended to take up space deep in his chest whenever he and Nita got a little intimate. He’d gotten so used to bracing for that guilt that it took him a while to notice that it hadn’t crept up on him this time.

In that same space, he just felt a warm sort of buzz instead. And it was a very welcome change.

~*~*~*~

After Frankie got out of the shower, Nita gave him a quick tour of the house. He was working very hard to keep his jaw from dropping open, especially when they went upstairs and walked into the movie theater. There was a movie theater in the house!

Around 5 o’clock, Nita started getting ready for work, having decided to get there early to make sure everything was going smoothly with the stuff that she had ordered and to have it at least mostly set up before the club opened.

Frankie spent most of that time making sure he understood how the big flat screen in the living room worked. He could barely figure out how his phone worked a lot of the time, and this TV seemed even more complex than that.

“You have to hold down the button on the bottom left. It just has a line on it,” Nita was instructing him, having to yell from the master bedroom.

He scowled at the remote in frustration. “It’s not working!”

“Hold it longer!”

After holding the button for longer than one second, the menu he was looking for appeared at the top of the screen. “Oh.”

Nita walked out of the bedroom a moment later. “Did you get it?”

“Yeah,” he said sheepishly, glancing her way, “thank you.” Then, he was doing a double take, mild embarrassment forgotten as he watched her walk by the back of the couch.

She was wearing a suit. A three-piece, navy suit that fit her very well. There were silver cufflinks that matched the silver tie-clip, which was clipped to the burgundy tie that matched the burgundy pocket square. It all looked very good on her.

“Do you—do you have a business meeting?” There was the faintest waver in his voice.

Shuffling through a small stack of papers on the kitchen counter, Nita didn’t seem to notice the change. “No, this is just what I usually wear to work. I thought I mentioned the suits,” she said.

“You did. I just…” he shook his head, still staring. “You look nice.”

She flashed him a sweet little smile. “Thank you. I feel nice.” Exchanging the papers for her car keys, she made her way over to where he sat on the couch. “You look nice, too,” she told him, leaning down to give him a quick kiss that made his heart skip.

“Yeah, an old t-shirt and jeans are incredibly fashionable,” he said, chuckling.

Rolling her eyes, she let her fingers brush through his hair. “Just because you’re wearing comfortable clothes doesn’t mean you look any less nice.”

He smirked. “You might be a little biased.”

“I thought you said I didn’t like you because it’s the first time you’ve seen my house.”

“Nah, I know you like me. Why else would you put up with my technological struggles?”

She laughed. “You know, it makes me feel a little iffy about the whole army pilot thing,” she teased.

“Helicopters make sense, though.” He gestured toward the TV. “This shit is made to be confusing.”

She raised an eyebrow skeptically. “TV add-ons exist to antagonize you, hmm?”

“They do!”

She just shook her head, looking him over with fond amusement. “Just try not to break it, okay?” Her nails gently grazed his scalp and the sensation swept down his spine. “There’s all kinds of stuff in the kitchen whenever you decide to have dinner. I made baked spaghetti the other day and there’s leftovers if you’re interested.” She bent to give him one last kiss. “I need to get going. Call me if you need anything, alright?”

He grinned up at her. “I’ll be fine. What time are you getting back?”

“I usually make it here a little after midnight,” she said with a shrug. “Not exactly a normal workday sort of business.”

“I’ll see you then.”

She gave a small wave as she headed toward the front door. “See you. And make sure you rest!”

“Yeah, yeah,” he called back, sneaking a look at her retreating form when she turned away.

As soon as the front door closed behind her, he groaned, letting his head fall against the back of the couch as he covered his face.

That fucking suit.

~*~*~*~

He spent most of his time wandering around the house or lounging on the couch with a movie. At one point, he thought about trying to play a video game, but given that he hadn’t really touched one since Santi found a copy of Halo to play using a base’s XBox years ago, he wasn’t terribly confident in his ability to set it up.

The pain meds he’d been sent home with were making it easier to get up and move around without much incident, but he wasn’t going to be doing toe touches anytime soon. He also wasn’t able to comfortably pop his back, which was a far more pressing annoyance.

He didn’t realize just how much time had passed until his eyelids were drooping and he couldn’t focus on the movie he’d put on anymore.

Nita would get back soon, so he brought his dinner plate to the sink and threw out his empty can of orange soda. He made sure the few dishes were washed before he shuffled into the bedroom to change and get ready for bed.

It was while he was brushing his teeth that he heard the front door open and the faint jingle of Nita’s keys.

“Honey?” she called.

“Bathroom,” he replied, voice slightly muffled by toothpaste before he spat into the sink.

He didn’t think to brace himself before she walked into the bedroom and stopped in the doorway of the en suite. One glance toward her and his eyes went wide just like they had before she left, heart rate rising.

Jesus Christ, she wore this sort of thing every time she went to work? He was going to lose his mind while he was staying with her.

She seemed amused, brows lifting at his reaction. “What’s that look about?”

He just shook his head, feeling a little warm in the face as his eyes dropped back down to the sink.

She walked into the bathroom and stopped at his side, brushing a hand across his shoulders as she leaned a hip against the counter. “What?” she prodded gently.

He rinsed off his toothbrush, taking a few seconds to respond. “You look nice.”

“You said that before I left, Frankie,” she said, smirking as she played with the curling hair at his nape.

“I know.” He turned to her, jaw rocking as he tried to convey himself. “I really mean it.”

She nodded slowly. “Okay…”

Sighing in frustration, he reached out to draw her closer and rest his hand in the curve of her waist. The corners of her mouth lifted as he gazed down at her. “When you said that you wore suits to work,” he said, voice low, “I didn’t realize just how sexy that would be.”

“So, that’s what the look was about,” she mused.

His eyes drifted down to her lips. “Yeah.”

She rose up just enough to press a warm kiss to his lips, still twirling his hair around her fingers.

When they broke apart, she smiled. “I’ll be sure to keep that in mind.”

~*~*~*~

Sleep lingered for a while, leaving him to slowly drift closer to consciousness. He was comfortable, he knew that much. The sheets smelled clean and familiar. The people in the apartment upstairs either weren’t up yet or they had already left, and he considered himself lucky for that. They made so much noise in the mornings and he always felt bad about that when Nita stayed over.

Nita.

As more awareness crept in, he felt the subtle weight pressing against his arm. Opening his eyes felt like a Herculean task, but he squinted over to his left.

She was on her side, facing him, clearly still asleep. Dark hair surrounded her head, a few strands that had fallen in front of her face were now gently disturbed with each breath. One hand was tucked against her chest, the other lay curled against his arm.

He turned his head toward the nightstand to check the time, frowning when his alarm clock wasn’t there. When did he buy a new lamp?

He settled further into consciousness and turned back to Nita. Right. They were at her place now.

Carefully, chest twinging and aching with every move, he rolled onto his side to look at her. The meds he’d taken before falling asleep were clearly wearing off, but he couldn’t bring himself to care too much yet.

His hand covered hers, thumb brushing over her knuckles and tracing her fingers. He wasn’t entirely sure how he’d ended up here. After the big downward spiral that had happened a little over a year ago, he had been existing in anxious monotony, just waiting for the next thing to knock his feet out from under him.

In a way, he was still waiting for that. Getting hit so hard with bad memories that he’d put himself in the hospital wasn’t exactly an improvement. As bad as that had gone, as bad as that could have gone, the brunt of it only took up one morning.

And how many mornings had been like this, these last few weeks? Where he felt reluctant to leave bed, not to avoid the day, but to have just a few more minutes of quiet with her. They could just lay here and enjoy each other’s warmth, stay tucked close until the last possible moment.

Maybe, something that had gone missing from his life wasn’t quite missing anymore.

Nita stirred, her hand twitching under his as she shifted closer. Her eyes barely opened before falling shut again. “Morning,” she mumbled.

He grinned, lifting her hand to his lips and kissing her knuckles. “Good morning.”

Her eyes opened again, staying that way this time, though she was still squinting against the dim light. “I like your morning voice,” she informed him, lips quirking up.

“My morning voice?”

“Mm-hmm.” She gently freed her hand from his hold and trailed her fingertips up his arm. “Soft and raspy and deep. It’s nice.”

He flushed a bit, reaching to brush the hair out of her face and letting his hand settle against her cheek. “You’re beautiful,” he said softly. “And I like your morning voice too.”

“Sap,” she whispered, smiling against his palm.

“You started it.”

She laughed.

He’d never get enough of her laugh.

“How are you feeling? Do you need to take something yet?” she asked.

He shook his head. “I’m alright for now. I’ll take something once we make coffee.” His thumb lightly traced her lower lip and he could feel her watching him before he brought his eyes back up to hers.

“Francisco,” she breathed, gently kissing the pad of his thumb.

It warmed him from the inside out and he was leaning in before he knew it.

Her lips were soft and moved with his languidly, setting a slow and leisurely pace. He could feel himself sinking into it when the kiss deepened, unhurried as he explored her mouth, hands roaming down to skim over her bare thigh and grip her hip.

Her hands were in his hair, combing through the stuck up and messy curls. She scooted closer and he wrapped both arms around her, ignoring the burning ache across his ribcage.

She shivered when his hand slid under her shirt, fingers brushing up her spine, a low moan muffled against his mouth.

He was becoming increasingly aware of an entirely different ache, this one making him consider adjusting his boxers, but he decided against it since that would mean letting go of Nita.

His heart skipped when her knee nudged up by his hip, not quite hooking around him, and he swiftly gave in. “I want you,” he groaned, a hand cupping her ass and drawing her closer.

She didn’t miss his slight wince at the move, shaking her head and holding his face in her hands. “We can’t do that, honey.”

“Fuck,” he grunted, leaning his forehead against hers. They were both breathing a little heavily, one of his hands still under her shirt, drawing circles over her back. He let out a long exhale and shifted back enough to meet her eyes, biting his lip thoughtfully. “What if...you sit on the edge of the bed? And I’ll kneel on the floor?”

Her brows shot up. “Oh?” She moved closer again, glancing down at his mouth. “Is that what you want?” she asked.

He nodded, lips parting as she kissed him again.

“I want that, Francisco.”

He peppered kisses across her face, drawing that laugh out of her again, before he slid back and off  of the bed, easing down onto the floor with a wide grin.

She shuffled over, sharing his smile as she arranged herself on the edge of the bed. “Do I need to take anything off? Not really wearing much to begin with.” She traced a finger down his nose.

He smoothed his hands down his thighs before he trailed them up her calves. “I’ve got it,” he said, pressing a kiss to the side of her knee.

She leaned back, holding herself up so she could watch as his lips trailed slowly from her knee and up her inner thigh, his touch featherlight across her skin. As he moved higher, she let her thighs fall open wider, chewing her lip. She sucked in a breath when his teeth grazed her skin, his eyes meeting hers.

Kissing him had already gotten her started, but then having him offer to get on his knees and eat her out had ensured that she was thoroughly turned on. Now, just seeing it, feeling him work his way closer, was only adding to the arousal that was steadily burning through her.

The scruff along his jaw added just enough roughness to set her nerves alight and draw out quiet sighs, making her eyes slip shut.

He was almost where she needed him when he began pressing hot, open kisses to her inner thighs, his tongue a soothing contrast to the faint nips and scratch of facial hair.

“I didn’t realize you were a tease, honey,” she crooned, tangling a hand in his hair.

He chuckled, breath huffing over her skin. “Just want to be sure.”

“I’m very sure.”

“Alright,” he laughed, “point taken.” One more soft kiss and he was leaning back, letting her legs close before he hooked his fingers into the waistband of her panties and slowly pulled them down her legs.

He shuffled closer, drawing one of her thighs up over his shoulder and making her flop onto her back with a laugh. “You are so gorgeous, baby,” he said, brushing his cheek against her inner thigh and locking eyes with her as she smiled at him.

“Totally a sap,” she teased, making him roll his eyes and grin as he leaned in.

The first brush of his tongue had her sliding both hands into his hair. He pushed her thighs open wider, delving between her folds with a groan. His mouth was so hot against her, tongue scorching with each lick over her pussy.

The tip of his nose brushed her clit and her hold on his hair tightened in response. He moaned, pressing deeper into her pussy and skimming his hands along her thighs. She tensed and relaxed under his hands, body shifting with every tilt of his head as he worked her over.

Arousal warmed her skin, pleasure tingling through her and slowly coiling tighter and tighter. She leaned her head back into the mattress, lips parting with a faint huff.

He brought his attention to her clit, his mouth going soft, tongue laving gently as her back arched.

“Fuck,” she gasped. “Just like that, Francisco.”

Nita tugged on his hair, sending pinpricks of pleasure down his spine. Sucking her clit between his lips, he traced the tip of his tongue over the bundle, her responding moan filling the quiet room and setting off a little spark of pride within him.

The heel of her foot pressed into his back, drew him impossibly closer, and he was happy to give in. He opened his eyes, taking in the sight of her, arched and breathless. Lifting her other thigh up onto his shoulder, the muscles trembling faintly, he slid a hand up her side. He stopped at her breast, tracing her nipple through the thin sleep shirt.

She moaned his name, covering his hand with one of her own and rolling her hips to meet his face. “So fucking good,” she praised. Her grip on his hair tightened further, pulling a moan from him. The vibration made her shiver, adding another level of stimulation right against her clit.

His tongue dipped back down and slid into her pussy as he buried his face between her thighs, mouth fully engulfing her.

“Yes, Francisco,” she breathed. “Close.”

Frankie was already long gone, breathless with the need to tip her over the edge, the way she moaned his name and writhed under his mouth completely fogging his mind with pleasure. He swiped the tip of his tongue across her clit, adding more pressure until the prickle of her hold on his hair turned sharp and her thighs tensed around his head.

The sound she made as she came almost had him following suit. He kept going, bringing the pressure back down slowly, softly kneading her breast. When she was moaning quietly, limbs almost entirely limp, he finally sat back, panting. The burning ache across his ribs was nothing compared to his contented happiness.

He let his gaze trail over her. Skin flushed and warm, her chest still heaving, eyes closed and lips parted as she came back down to Earth. Her thighs still spread open and pussy in full view, shining with her arousal, same as his face.

She pushed herself up slowly, running a hand through her own hair and meeting his eyes with a satisfied smile, which he returned.

“I always like waking up to you, honey, but that was…” Nita sighed, leaning her head back. “Fuck.”

He chuckled under his breath. “That was my application for the boyfriend position. How’d I do?”

“We’ll definitely take you under consideration.” She bit back a grin, lightly knocking her foot against his thigh.

He huffed playfully. “Damn. Really thought I’d get it with that.”

She giggled, reaching out to comb through his hair, which she’d thoroughly ruffled. She leaned down closer to him. “After further consideration, it’s been determined that you don’t need to apply for a position that you already hold.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Now, are you gonna kiss me?”

He closed the small gap between them in answer, cupping her face and winding his fingers into her hair.

She groaned softly at the taste of herself on his lips, hands brushing up his arms. She could feel him smile into the kiss just before they broke apart.

“Do you still have that fancy coffee?” he asked.

She almost snorted. “Our minds are in two very different places right now.”

“I can be thinking about more than one thing at a time.”

“Oh, yeah?” She squeezed one of his shoulders.

“I should wipe my face,” he mumbled.

Her hands came up to cup his jaw. “Should you?”

Exhaling slowly through his nose, he touched his forehead to hers. “Honey…”

“Okay, you do things your way,” she said, drawing back. “But if you’d like an idea of what I want to do…” She tilted her head, throwing a very pointed look downward.

He was quick to stand up, grunting in discomfort for more than just his chest, a blush warming his cheeks as he tried to discreetly adjust himself on his way to the bathroom.

Reappearing a moment later with a damp cloth and a clean face, he wiped away the bit of slick he’d gotten on her face when they kissed and then brought the cloth down between her legs. He made quick work of cleaning her up, but suddenly slowed.

She thought he was just being overly gentle until the cloth brushed, rather deliberately, against her sensitive clit.

Nita cursed, slapping his hand away while he laughed. “You’re the one who wanted coffee, payaso.” She swatted at his ass when he turned to drop the rag into the hamper. “Vamos!”

He gave her a pout, saying “I’m not a clown,” as she stood up to pull her underwear back on and follow him out of the bedroom. He reached back to offer his hand, which she took after a moment, rolling her eyes.

“You’re something.”

He grinned, the dimple in his cheek immediately making her own expression soften. “Soy el novio,” he said cheerily.

She squeezed his hand. “Sí lo eres.”

When they got to the kitchen, he stopped and pulled her close. “I don’t know where the coffee is,” he told her.

She pointed. “The cabinet over the coffee maker.”

His gaze fell on the coffee maker and he nodded. “Right.” Shuffling over, he opened the cabinet and started pulling things down to get the coffee ready.

“Frankie.”

He glanced back at her. “Yeah?”

“I can make the coffee,” she said, smirking.

He just shrugged. “I got it.”

She watched him measure out beans and put them in the grinder for a few seconds. Next thing she knew, her gaze had shifted from what he was doing to just admiring him. Unruly hair that was just a little too long and so incredibly soft, broad shoulders under an old t-shirt, toned arms that, based on her own experience, were perfect for falling asleep in, long legs that were just as nice, along with what she considered to be a very cute little butt.

She crossed the short distance to him right as he poured the ground coffee into a filter and set it in the coffee maker. She wrapped her arms around him, mindful of his ribs, and kissed his shoulder. “I have a proposition.”

“Alright.”

“I got that call about the shipment yesterday,” she began slowly.

His brow furrowed in confusion. “Yeah?”

“We got interrupted.” She let her hands move down a few inches. “And I’d really like to pick up where we left off. Do what I was gonna do before the call.”

The warm flush from earlier returned full force as he swallowed hard, trying to wrap the bag of coffee beans back up. “Yeah?” he repeated, voice straining.

She hummed, hands now tracing the waistband of his boxers. “What do you think?” One hand lowered the slightest bit further. “I couldn’t help but notice that you looked a little stiff when we left bed.”

He’d slowly been bringing himself down, cock starting to soften as he ignored it to keep her from feeling like she had to return the favor. He’d been wanting to make her feel good since that first night at his apartment, and he got a lot out of knowing he’d done just that before they’d gotten out of bed.

But now he was aching all over again. “I think—I think you’re the tease now.”

“Let’s fix that,” she said softly. She reached further and cupped him through his boxers, giving him a firm squeeze.

His mouth fell open and he gripped the edge of the countertop, a rough moan rising up from deep in his chest, his eyes falling shut. She carefully turned him around so he could lean back against the counter, readjusting her hold on his cock as she pressed her lips to his throat. He opened his eyes, lids feeling heavy with lust as he blinked down at her.

She seemed very pleased with his reaction. “You are very good with that mouth, honey.” She rose up higher, kissing the corner of his mouth before lowering her voice. “And the fact that eating me out made you this hard is so fucking sexy.”

He rested a hand at her hip. “Jesus, baby…”

Her lips brushed along his jaw as she traced her thumb over his clothed length. “I want to suck your cock, Francisco,” she whispered near his ear.

“Please,” he ground out.

Nita pulled back with a coy grin. Without wasting another second, she tugged his boxers down and slid down onto her knees. Her nails lightly dragged up along the outsides of his thighs as she kissed from his hip bones inward. She took hold of him, steadying his heavy cock and running the flat of her tongue over the head, glancing up into his eyes.

Two dark, lust blown gazes met and Nita closed her lips around the head of him, sucking gently. He could feel himself throb, his grip on the counter tightening as arousal burned through his veins.

It had been a while for him. He already felt so close to the edge.

The tip of her tongue pressed into the underside of his cock, just under the crown, and he cursed, a hand reaching to slip into her hair. Her pleased hum sent jolts of electricity across his nerves. She bobbed steadily, taking a bit more of him into her mouth each time. He was almost dizzy when he reached the back of her throat, biting his lip hard.

She looked up at him again, watching the tendons in his neck stand out as he strained to keep himself from losing it. His eyes were closed and he was trying not to breathe too hard. As she drew back, she couldn’t help but smirk a bit.

She worked her way back down his shaft until he was at the back of her throat again. Then, she kept going forward, taking him deeper until her lips were wrapped around the base, nose pressing into the coarse hair just above it.

Her jaw ached and her eyes were watering, drool sliding down her chin. But it was beyond worth it when she swallowed around his cock and he made the most breathtakingly broken sound she’d ever heard.

His whole body trembled at the feeling, brow furrowed and mouth dropping open.

She drew back far enough to breathe, pressing her tongue up against the vein that ran along the underside of his shaft, and cupped his balls in one hand.

On instinct, his fingers tangled further in her hair and he gave a slight, jerky thrust of his hips. He gritted his teeth. “Shit, baby, I’m so—“

She took him down her throat again, gently massaging his balls, and his voice died. His whole body buzzed with pleasure and he couldn’t hold back when she swallowed this time. He came undone with a low moan of her name, knuckles white where he gripped the counter.

She drew off of him slowly, taking everything he gave until his shoulders sagged in blissful relief and his knees were close to giving out beneath him.

They were both panting, her sitting back, teary eyed with spit around her lips and chin, him leaning heavily against the counter, head tilted back. Nita got to her feet after a moment and grabbed a napkin to dab at her eyes and wipe her mouth. She also took the liberty of pulling Frankie’s boxers back up his legs, patting his hip as she smiled up at him.

“So. Coffee?” she asked, voice a little rough.

Frankie huffed a laugh, pulling her into a lazy kiss.

~*~*~*~

Taglist

@zeldasayer @beskars @winters-buck @the-feckless-wonder @yodaswrinkles @wickedfrsgrl @roxypeanut @mrsparknuts @spacegayofficial @i-hide-inside-my-head @lestrange2703 @tintinwrites @shadow-assassin-blix @flightlessangelwings @agentpike @woakiees @darksideofclarke @velvetmel0n @damerondjarin @poeticandors @thirsty-flygirl @perropascal @writefightandflightclub @yougottakeeponkeepinon @huliabitch @hopelikethesun @maxlordd @absurdthirst @pablopascal @ezrasarm @storiesofthefandomlovers @catfishingmorales @cinewhore

~ Mike

[bthenoise]

The Best Of 2020 As Picked By Members Of Underoath, The Amity Affliction, August Burns Red, Neck Deep, Movements and More

Okay, we know what you’re thinking: Isn’t it a bit of an oxymoron to list the “best” things to come from such a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad year? 

While yes, we completely agree with that statement, we would be remiss not to shine a light on all the wonderful things that helped us survive one of the most challenging years in recent memory -- you know, like best album, best song, best movie, etc.

So, as a way to help you count down the end of this miserable year (22 days, 7 hours and 52 minutes to go as of this writing), we’ve completely turned our year-end, best-of list over to the artists we cover on a daily basis. Because let’s face it, as we’ve noted in years past, their opinions are the ones we all really care about, right? 

Right. 

To check out what members of Underoath, The Amity Affliction, August Burns Red, Neck Deep, Knuckle Puck, Movements, Counterparts, Hatebreed and more have all been obsessing over for the past year or so, be sure to see below. We hope you enjoy this final list as much as we do and wish you all the most peaceful and positive holiday season.

Enjoy!

SPENCER CHAMBERLAIN - UNDEROATH 

Best Album of 2020: Tame Impala - The Slow Rush Best Song of 2020: Foster the People - “Lambs Wool” Best Music Video of 2020: Sir Sly - “Material Boy” (also one of the best songs of 2020) Most Underrated Album of 2020: The Chain Gang of 1974 - Honey Moon Drips Best Movie of 2020: Onward Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: American Horror Story Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Metal Kenneth Copeland had me cracking up Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: I really enjoyed playing Lost In The Sound of Separation in full for the first time ever and it was our first ever live stream so it was super special and something I’ll never forget The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: Writing tons of music, my lady, hiking/working out and my great dane Snoopy 2021 New Year’s Resolution: Put MORE art into the world

AHREN STRINGER - THE AMITY AFFLICTION

Best Album of 2020:  Phoebe Bridgers - Punisher Best Song of 2020:  Spiritbox - “Holy Roller” Best Music Video of 2020:  Architects - “Black Lungs” Most Underrated Album of 2020: Lost For Life - We All Share The Blame Best Movie of 2020: Palm Springs Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: Queen’s Gambit Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Donald Trump’s Twitter account. Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: Europe tour with Beartooth right before the pandemic. The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: Drawing and painting 2021 New Year’s Resolution: Start smoking more

JB BRUBAKER - AUGUST BURNS RED

Best Album of 2020: Hum - Inlet Best Song of 2020: Sir Sly - “All Your Love” Best Music Video of 2020: NOFX - “Live At Red Rocks” Most Underrated Album of 2020: Sea Wolf - Through A Dark Wood Best Movie of 2020: The Social Dilemma  Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: Queen’s Gambit Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: https://youtu.be/0JPRvxTjfOk Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: Best show I played this year was our Thrill Seeker 15 Year Anniversary livestream, though I hope that we one-up that show on Dec 12th when we do our Christmas Burns Red show. The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: The return of live sports, specifically baseball and especially football. Fantasy sports have been my 2020 escape. 2021 New Year’s Resolution: I’d like to look on the bright side more. 2020 has been an easy year to focus on the negative. I don’t want to be that way next year (or ever).

KEVIN MAIDA - KNUCKLE PUCK

Best Album of 2020: Tie between HAIM's Women In Music Pt. III or Owen’s The Avalanche or Slow Pulp’s Movey

Best Song of 2020: “Me & You Together Song” by The 1975

Best Music Video of 2020: Faye Webster’s “Better Distractions” or Phoebe Bridgers’ “I Know The End” or HAIM’s “Man From The Magazine”

Most Underrated Album of 2020: Burst by Snarls

Best Movie of 2020: Dang, what movies came out this year? Each year, I gauge the movies I saw by recounting seeing them in theaters, but  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I really enjoyed Portrait of a Lady On Fire though and I saw Uncut Gems on New Year’s Day this year, so I’m counting that as well.

Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: I’m really bad with keeping up with contemporary television, but I am always watching The Sopranos on a loop. I've had so many people tell me this year that they started watching Sopranos because of all the extra time at home, so I loved living vicariously through others watching it for the first time. I’ve also been binging 30 Rock for the first time and it is simply a delight.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Phoebe Bridgers and Maggie Rogers’ “Iris” cover album art.

Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: Back in February, we played at Beat Kitchen in Chicago with Heart Attack Man and One Step Closer to begin the only tour we would do this year. We hadn’t played there in years, but it felt so good to be back in that venue’s atmosphere again.

The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: My girlfriend, staying connected with my friends and family, riding my bike around the city, having time to somewhat enjoy summer at home in Chicago and revisiting favorite movies of mine.

2021 New Year’s Resolution: Be kinder to others and kinder to myself.

PATRICK MIRANDA - MOVEMENTS

Best Album of 2020: Punisher - Phoebe Bridgers Best Song of 2020: Too many to pick just one Best Music Video of 2020: “Popstar” - Drake/DJ Khaled Most Underrated Album of 2020: Marigold - Pinegrove Best Movie of 2020: Borat 2 Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: The Mandalorian Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Cranberry juice skateboard guy Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: LDB Fest in Louisville Kentucky 2020, BC (before Covid) The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: Video games and comfort food 2021 New Year’s Resolution: Let’s be honest, I’m not sticking to any resolutions

BRENDAN MURPHY - COUNTERPARTS

Best Album of 2020: I haven't even heard it yet, but I'm pretty sure it'll be the new Seahaven record. Band fucking rocks and I've been waiting like 6 years for new music.

Best Song of 2020: The 1975 - “If You're Too Shy (Let Me Know)”

Best Music Video of 2020: It's a tie, but I'm gonna have to go with “Spirit Halloween Theme Song” and the follow up “Unleash Your Spirit” both by Nick Lutsko.

Most Underrated Album of 2020: Chamber - Cost of Sacrifice

Best Movie of 2020: I don't think I've watched any movies that came out this year other than the new Borat, so I guess that's my pick by default. It was VERY NICE!! I wish I could marry the movie so the movie could be MY WIFE!! Get it? You get it. We all get it. It's great. 

Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: Again, I've been slacking in terms of newer movies/tv and honestly, I just kinda alternate between watching The Simpsons seasons 3-9 and then watching Kenny Vs Spenny from beginning to end. If you haven't seen KvS, the entire series is on YouTube so please just watch it. I promise it's the best thing to come out of Canada... me being the second best.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: When we released the embroidered NLTL hoodie and everyone filled their diapers with shit.

Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: Tough call, but it's gotta be either the Chainsmokers concert in the Hamptons or the biker festival in Sturgis that Smash Mouth played.

The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: Alcohol, adopting my cat Kuma and finally being diagnosed with ADD so I could get a Vyvanse prescription.

2021 New Year’s Resolution: Play a single show LMAOOOOOO

OSHIE BICHAR - BEARTOOTH

Best Album of 2020: Bring Me The Horizon - Post Human: Survival Horror Best Song of 2020: Bring Me The Horizon - “Parasite Eve" Best Music Video of 2020: Bring Me The Horizon feat Yungblud - “OBEY" Most Underrated Album of 2020: Silverstein - A Beautiful Place To Drown Best Movie of 2020: Tenet  Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: The Mandalorian     Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Baby Yoda memes Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: Beartooth drive-in show in Oshkosh, WI The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: Call of Duty: Warzone  2021 New Year’s Resolution: Stop spending so much money on Star Wars toys

TRAVIS MIGUEL - ATREYU

Best Album of 2020: Insect Ark - The Vanishing Best Song of 2020: clipping. - “Say The Name” Best Music Video of 2020: Billie Eilish - “Everything I Wanted” Most Underrated Album of 2020: Thundercat - It Is What It Is Best Movie of 2020: The Social Dilemma Most Binge Worthy TV Show of 2020: The Mandalorian Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Any of the “My Plans for 2020” memes Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: Atreyu - Melbourne, Australia @ Max Watts, Feb 2020. Things that helped you get through 2020: Guitar, video games, hanging with the wife and cat, finishing an album, Atreyu “Carry the Fire” livestream and lots of junk food. 2021 New Year Resolution: Gonna try to have more of that PMA.

MATT BRYNE - HATEBREED

Best Album of 2020: Napalm Death - Throes of Joy In The Jaws Of Defeatism

Best Song of 2020:  See question #1.  Pick any song from it.  

Best Music Video of 2020:  I don’t have one. I miss the infant days of MTV when music videos were new, fresh and hypnotizing. I used to sit for hours and wait for the Van Halen “Jump” video to come on.  So, I’ll go with that music video for this question. Can I do that?

Most Underrated Album of 2020: Hum - Inlet

Best Movie of 2020: The Mandalorian series.  I rarely watch full movies anymore. It’s all about getting sucked into a TV series.  

Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: Can’t choose only one. The Queen’s Gambit, The Mandalorian, Living With Yourself, Dead To Me…

Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Anything posted on kookslams. I could surf that Insta account all damn day!!!

Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: None. We have all been stuck at home. So, best attended/played/watched is me, myself and I crushing it on my basement practice jams. Or falling down the rabbit-hole watching drum solos or drum clips on youtube.  

The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: 1- I got married in May so that was a huge event that we made happen and enjoyed, given the current craziness. Couldn’t have asked for a more beautiful day. 2- Our dog, Ziti. He is a constant source of entertainment. 3- Yoga. 4- Ripping around on my mini-bike.

2021 New Year’s Resolution: Drink more water.  Spend less time looking at my phone.  Get back to playing shows again!!!

SAM BOWDEN - NECK DEEP

Best Album of 2020: Haim - Women In Music Pt. III

Best Song of 2020: Seaway - “Big Vibe”

Best Music Video of 2020: The 1975 - “The Birthday Party”

Most Underrated Album of 2020: I don’t really know what’s underrated and I’ve not listened to a bunch this year but Knuckle Puck 20/20 is a great album that people should go check out if they haven’t already.

Best Movie of 2020: The Trial of the Chicago 7

Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: Schitt’s Creek. Although this wasn’t strictly all released in 2020, the final season was and I hadn’t seen any before this year. It was amazing and I definitely binged the whole thing. Final season is a tear jerker for sure. Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: Well like most people in music we didn’t get to play a show this year, however, I did attend a Counterparts show in Feb at Rock City which ruled! Static Dress were also on the tour so was great getting to finally see them!

The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: Call of Duty - Warzone. Can’t say I’m proud about this one but It helped pass time if nothing else. More serious though, I bought my girlfriend a kitten a few months ago and he’s been a bundle of joy for us. 2021 New Year’s Resolution: Enjoy the little things. This year took a lot of normality out of life and it’s given me a lot of time to reflect and look back on things I’ve done and we’ve done as a band. It’s easy to get caught up and just be thinking about what’s next and not really live in that moment, so next year I’ll be savoring every moment and every show we get.

NICK VENTIMIGLIA - GRAYSCALE

Best Album of 2020: This is so tough but I think Deftones’ Ohms is my favorite album of the year. 

Best Song of 2020: I really don’t know if I can pick one but my most listened to was “The Spell of Mathematics” by Deftones

Best Music Video of 2020: I absolutely loved the Bring Me the Horizon video for “Parasite Eve.” But also, the “Ohms” video by Deftones was unreal as well.

Most Underrated Album of 2020: There really are a few I believe. It was a very weird year to put out a record so I think a TON of albums flew under the radar which is a bummer because there was so much great music put out. I think Four Year Strong's Brain Pain was amazing and their best album to date. I think Hundredth’s Somewhere Nowhere was unreal. Rich People put out Harmony in August and I absolutely love that record and those boys. The Killers put a record out called Imploding the Mirage that has some absolute heaters on it as well. The Ghost Inside made a wild comeback with Aftermath that makes you want to go ape shit front to back. Finally, I’d say The Used made an amazing album that caught them right back up with making great music. Not that they didn’t on the previous records, but it feels like they found themselves again. They pushed a lot of boundaries on Heartwork and had some insane songwriting on that record.

Best Movie of 2020: To be honest, I didn’t really watch many new movies this year. The Social Dilemma was super eye-opening and very true. If you dig creepy thrillers, The Devil All the Time was probably top for me. A ton of great actors and just such an eerie vibe in the cinematography.  

Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: I feel like the easy answer is Tiger King, but I really dug The Queen’s Gambit and The Undoing as of late.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: I hate the internet really, there is just so much bullshit overload that I can’t even process it all. With that said, when Joe Exotic threw on his EMS jacket when his employee got her arm bit off by a tiger, THAT was UNREAL. I was crying laughing. This man had this jacket for a moment like this. He is wearing this EMS bomber with king tight white jeans, a true fashion icon. The memes that followed were priceless. The “I am never gunna financially recover from this…” memes. So great.

Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: I would have to say the best show I attended this year was the Dashboard Confessional anniversary shows in Detroit. It was back to back nights where Chris played 'The Places You Have Come to Fear the Most’ and ‘A Mark, A Mission, A Brand, A Scar.’ in their entirety. He did some older stuff as well off of the ’So Impossible' EP and ‘Swiss Army Romance’ which rocked. Best show we played would have to be on our headliner earlier this year. We played The Observatory in Santa Ana, CA and it was unreal. Best watched show was probably the Puscifer live stream or the Underoath stream. 

The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: I think it was the ability to write more than we usually are able to and kind of tighten up the behind the scenes aspects of Grayscale that people don’t often see. Beyond that, being able to spend time with loved ones and family has been great. It’s been a great year for self reflection as well and I feel like that’s always a good thing when you can get a fresh perspective on life when things get shaken up. I’ve been super thankful even more so this year for the people I have in my life and the opportunities I’ve been given. Those are some of the big things that got me through.

2021 New Year’s Resolution: Honestly, I am not much of a resolution guy, but I’d say just give my all to everything I am passionate about and treat everyone with love. Playing shows in 2021 would be absolutely ideal for a resolutions well.

JULIET SIMMS

Best Album of 2020: Starbenders - Love Potions Best Song of 2020: “You About To Lose Your Job” Best Music Video of 2020: In This Moment - “As Above So Below” Most Underrated Album of 2020: Creeper - Sex, Death and the Infinite Void Best Movie of 2020: Harley Quinn: Birds of Prey Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: Queen’s Gambit Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Ocean Spray Fleetwood Mac guy. Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: uhhhhh - welcome to hell. I attended exactly one concert this year and that was a live stream for BVB. The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: Music, YouTube, good shows, my babe, my pets and staying busy. 2021 New Year’s Resolution: To get the fuck out of the house 😂. On a more music related note - put my album out ✨

OLLIE BAXXTER - BROADSIDE

Best Album of 2020: Into the Raging Sea by Broadside Best Song of 2020: “Watermelon Sugar” by Harry Styles Best Music Video of 2020: “Parasite Eve” - Bring Me The Horizon Most Underrated Album of 2020: Into the Raging Sea by Broadside Best Movie of 2020: Palm Springs Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: 90 Day Fiancé Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Anything involving our EX president Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: *one long sigh* The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: My miniature dachshund puppy and books 2021 New Year’s Resolution: Never take seeing someone's whole face for granted again

VINNIE CARUANA - I AM THE AVALANCHE // THE MOVIELIFE 

Best Album of 2020: Songs For The General Public - The Lemon Twigs Best Song of 2020: “War” - Idles Best Music Video of 2020: I haven’t seen any Most Underrated Album of 2020: DIVE - I am the Avalanche Best Movie of 2020: On the Rocks Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: Jeopardy on DVR. RIP ALEX TREBEK Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Four Seasons Total Landscaping Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: Constant Elevation/ Rule Them All @ Max Fish NYC The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: Jon Oliver, beer, weed, whiskey, Liverpool Football Club, friends, family, music. 2021 New Year’s Resolution: To spread more joy than ever

ALEX MAGNAN - YOUNG CULTURE

Best Album of 2020: Folklore by Taylor Swift Best Song of 2020: “How Big Is Your Brain” by Super American Best Music Video of 2020: “The Birthday Party” by the 1975 Most Underrated Album of 2020: Women In Music pt. III by Haim Best Movie of 2020: Tenet Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: Ozark Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Pretending to break up my band Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: Playing Tampa, FL back in March The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: Zoom calls 2021 New Year’s Resolution: Be the best live band when shows come back

MAX BREMER - KINGDOM OF GIANTS

Best Album of 2020: Man there’s a few really good ones that make it so hard to choose. I really enjoyed Loathe’s I Let It In And It Took Everything but I gotta shout out Like Moths to Flames’s No Eternity in Gold and Bring Me The Horizon’s Post Human for sure.

Best Song of 2020: Another insanely hard question! I guess I’m gonna say “Teardrops” by Bring Me The Horizon but again I’m gonna also shout out “Animals” by Architects

Best Music Video of 2020: “Teardrops” by Bring Me The Horizon. If you couldn’t tell I’m a big fan of them haha

Most Underrated Album of 2020: Idk if I’d say it’s underrated but I absolutely loved Make Them Suffer’s How to Survive a Funeral

Best Movie of 2020: I haven’t even seen it yet, but I know it’s gonna be Tenet

Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: Lovecraft Country

Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: There’s so many it’s hard for me to retain any of them. I can’t keep track.

Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: Well my band sold out every show we played this year which was only one haha but for real it was an awesome time and I love hearing our lyrics screamed back at us.

The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: My wife, our new daughter, Indi, and our album PASSENGER 100%

2021 New Year’s Resolution: My wife and I just had our first daughter so it’s gonna be to be the best father I can possibly be and write as many songs as possible until we can rip shows again.

NICK ANDERSON - THE WRECKS

Best Album of 2020: Punisher - Phoebe Bridgers Best Song of 2020: “Dying Breed” - The Killers  Best Music Video of 2020: Nothing But Thieves - “Impossible” Most Underrated Album of 2020: Color Theory - Soccer Mommy Best Movie of 2020: The Go-Go’s Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: Dave Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Four Seasons Total Landscaping  Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: :( The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: Pro Tools 2021 New Year’s Resolution: Spend more time outside of the studio

CAMM KNOPP - NEVER LOVED

Best Album of 2020: It’s hard to pick one, but a few I really enjoyed are Father Of All… by Greenday, Ugly Is The New Beautiful by Oliver Tree and RTJ4 by Run The Jewels Best Song of 2020: There has been so many amazing songs released this year it feels impossible picking just one Best Music Video of 2020: Any Oliver Tree music video from his recent album Most Underrated Album of 2020: Watchito Rico by Boy Pablo Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: Tiger King Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Tiger King memes were pretty great Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: Probably the Sugar Ray livestream The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: Zoom parties, friends/family, writing music, netflix, and lots of self care 2021 New Year’s Resolution: Getting back on the road!

SHARPTOOTH

MATT HAGUE 

Best Album of 2020: Purity Ring - WOMB Best Song of 2020: “Headlights on the Parade” - The Blue Nile Best Music Video of 2020: “When Doves Cry” - Prince Most Underrated Album of 2020: The Hot N’ Heavy - Drop Dead, Gorgeous Best Movie of 2020: Joker (shit was crazy bro) Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: Devs Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Trump getting COVID Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: The only band I saw this year was Single Mothers. Their drummer is very handsome. The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: HBO’s Oz 2021 New Year’s Resolution: Get yourself together. Move to Philly. Buy a loft. Start a noise band. Get 6 or 7 roommates. Eat hummus with them. Book some gigs. Paint. Smoke cloves. Listen to Animal Collective. Start some type of salsa company. KEITH HIGGINS

Best Album of 2020: Endless Twilight of Codependent Love - Sólstafir Best Song of 2020: “Oh Ruthless Great Divine Director” - Lingua Ignota Best Music Video of 2020: Hot Gospel or Cane Hill Most Underrated Album of 2020: Grave of a Dog - Sightless Pit Best Movie of 2020: Color Out of Space Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: The Mandalorian Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Trump getting COVID was top tier Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: LOL The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: Destiny 2, dogs and a lot of repressing things 2021 New Year’s Resolution: Turn my brain back on and be a person again hopefully

LANCE DONATI

Best Album of 2020: Underneath - Code Orange Best Song of 2020: “Boss Bitch” - Doja Cat Best Music Video of 2020: “Swallowing The Rabbit Whole” - Code Orange Most Underrated Album of 2020: I Disagree - Poppy Best Movie of 2020: Borat Subsequent Moviefilm: Delivery of Prodigious Bribe to American Regime for Make Benefit Once Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: Mandalorian Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: The fly landing on Mike Pence’s head Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: Darkest Hour  The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: Writing music for the next album.  2021 New Year’s Resolution: Get the next album process set up. 

PETER BRUNO

Best Album of 2020: Poppy - I Disagree. While critics might write this off as a unique, albeit kitsch blending of genres, this record is one of the more satisfying emotional journeys I’ve been on in quite some time. Poppy is able to capture a strange sort of sadness within these songs, that ironically, is often read as mere jouissance. Best Song of 2020: Poppy - “Sick of the Sun” Best Music Video of 2020: Run The Jewels - “Ooh La La” Most Underrated Album of 2020: Sound VVitch - Becoming. Imagine taking something like Chelsea Wolfe but leaning more into an experimental direction that is both sonically beautiful and grotesque. Best Movie of 2020: I’m Thinking of Ending Things, directed by Charlie Kaufman. It’s a shame that a lot of movies got pushed back this year. I think because of this, I didn’t wind up watching many movies from 2020, instead I used the pandemic to try to catch up on films from the past that I never seem to find time for. Still, I’ve come to really appreciate the journey that Kaufman seems to always insist on taking me. Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: Admittedly, I also haven’t watched a ton of new TV shows this year. But, there were both new seasons of Curb Your Enthusiasm and The Eric Andre Show, which always finds a way to make me happy. However, in terms of 2020 itself, I did finally watch The Sopranos for the first time and it completely lived up to the hype. Just an incredible TV show all around. I also binge watched all of Tim Heidecker’s On Cinema at the Cinema, which is quite the ride. There’s a whole cinematic universe for that TV show, it’s insane. I give it five bags of popcorn. Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Conner O’Malley’s video where he learns how to communicate with trains got me pretty good. Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: I thought the Code Orange live stream acoustic set was pretty neat. The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: Marijuana and Magic The Gathering. 2021 New Year’s Resolution: Try not to die.

LAUREN KASHAN 

Best Album of 2020: 1. High Road - Kesha. Basically, Kesha wrote an incredibly intense, emotional and fucking hilarious album about living her truth and telling all her haters to eat a dick and that’s really all I’ve ever needed in life.

2. “WAP” burned twelve times onto a CD-R from Best Buy. This one fucking song is a better album than 95% of anything I’ve ever heard and I’m a huge fan of anything related to black women kicking ass and taking names, sex and kink positivity, and insanely clever and funny lyrics. Plus, ANYTHING that makes weak, sexist, insecure men as BIG MAD as this song did is literally my kink.

Best Song of 2020: “My Own Dance” - Kesha.
 Best Music Video of 2020: “Say Nothing (In The Absence Of Content).” Fuck anyone who disagrees, that shit is iconic. Second runner up goes to “The Gray” because Peter made that whole fucking video himself and it’s POWERFUL and I still cry every single time I watch it.
 Most Underrated Album of 2020: Vagina Witchcraft’s self titled record. If you didn’t already notice, I’m pretty fucking done with listening to cis straight white dudes be ANGERY for half an hour; so this album is SUCH a breath of fresh air in a genre that’s become incredibly boring and derivative as of late. Listen to Vagina Witchcraft for sonically inventive, sludgy hardcore, bone-chilling vocal delivery and lyrics that are simultaneously calculated yet raw, and that ACTUALLY FUCKING SAY THINGS THAT ARE IMPORTANT AND RELEVANT AND SO FUCKING URGENT RIGHT NOW. 
 Best Movie of 2020: Miss Americana - The Taylor Swift documentary. One of the most validating things I’ve ever watched in my life and I ugly cried though the whole thing. I fucking love that woman. Most Binge-Worthy TV Show of 2020: I don’t watch TV… Does a YouTube series about voice actors playing D&D count? If so, my answer is Critical Role. Don’t try to binge it though, each episode is like 4 hours and there’s over a hundred episodes.
 Favorite Internet Moment of 2020: Hardcore twitter taking my band way too seriously and as a result of their own hubris, accidentally blowing up our music video and record release, and getting us exponentially more attention than we would have if those losers would just finally learn to fuck off and leave us alone! NICE GOING MOTHERFUCKERS I OWE YA ONE! *blows a kiss* Also, everything Lizzo did. DID YOU SEE HER “FLY IN MIKE PENCE’S HAIR” COSTUME?!?!

Best Concert You Attended/Played/Watched in 2020: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA GOOD ONE. 
I think the only live music related thing I even went to was a Drum & Bass show back in February in Brooklyn with Dimension, Sub Focus, and Culture Shock. I danced with my friends and drank Bright Fox. It was a simpler time.
 The Thing(s) That Helped Get You Through 2020: D&D, getting a suet feeder to watch birds outside my window and my bootcamp, Launch Academy, with all my brilliant and incredible Boston 30 Cohort-mates. Also, the warm weight of knowing that this coming year, a lot of terrible, evil, abusive people in the world are gonna finally get their comeuppance and I’m making popcorn with EXTRA salt.
 2021 New Year’s Resolution: Ohhhh I’m not going to spoil the surprise for you! But let’s just say I’m planning on using my new superpowers as a full stack software engineer, combined with my old superpowers as a vindictive and enraged bitch who hates rapists, to make the world a safer and more just place.

READ MORE: HERE ARE THE TOP 150 SONGS OF 2020

[favvnsongs]

this is the first thing i've written in like months pls forgive if it's messy

He hadn’t been home for over seven weeks, 49 days and counting. Madison checked in with hospitals every week, looked around grungy alleyways and evicted homes in hopes of finding him. He usually turned up around day 25, maybe 30. But never any longer than that.

  She’d learned that worrying did no good, that he’d either turn up dead or at their doorstep. Maybe a hospital if the cops picked him up. But Nick would regardless show up once more. When she was little, she’d wait nervously by the front windows. Nose pressed to the glass with hot air fogging it, leaving behind trails of prints and sticky hands on the sills until Madison yelled at her for making yet another mess. A few years later, she stopped wasting the tears on his absence. She stopped waiting by the window. She started to find other ways to fill the small void left inside of her when he wasn’t around.

  …

  When she was 14, he had been gone for a month. He’d also missed her birthday, and as usual Madison hadn’t even bought a cake, let alone remembered the date. Madison left that night, giggling with Travis and not to be expected back until the next day. She barged into his room and dug through his belongings quickly. Drawers of clothes on the ground, mattress pushed off the frame, books pulled from the small rickety shelving until she found his stash in a boot at the back of the closet. Three joints shoved into an old cigarette carton, sealed inside a bag. Picking them up, she heads back to her room after snagging a stray lighter from his dresser.

  She cracks the window open and leans against her headboard, taking a deep inhale that’s far too much for the first time. Her lungs are burning, but i she’s felt a shred of something for once since her birthday. He never forgets her birthday. Once the coughing stops, she takes a smaller hit and watches the smoke escape her lips. She thinks to turn on music, but stares at the streaks of light stretching across the ceiling instead. The air gets hot and burnt at the end, but she hardly notices. Her lungs buzz faintly, walls tipping slightly and she continues to stare. She ashes on her night stand, dropping the butt onto some books stacked below. Socks sliding down her feet, shirt pulled off and half-heartedly thrown off the bed. Her fingertips drag along the skin of her stomach, feeling the inhale/exhale and the way nails feel. She digs them in deeper, seeking a feeling of something. Anything.

  When they dip under the waist of her shorts, she pants and tries to imagine the way he’d touch her. To feel something. A small spark deep in her stomach makes her hips jerk but then? Nothing. She chases the spark….but can’t quite catch it.

  He comes home on the 31st night he’d been gone, to a startlingly quiet house. He walks upstairs, calling Alicia’s name sloppily and opens her door. She turns and stares at him, hand tucked firmly in her pants and air tainted with weed. When he meets her gaze, he doesn’t find that small sparkle reserved for him, or a small smile. No anger. Nothing. She pulls her hand out and wipes it lazily against the fabric of her shorts and rolls to the side of the bed, a silent invitation. “You were smoking weed?” Nick asks but receives only a shrug in response.

  He toes off his shoes, slipping in beside her and eyes heavy with fatigue. She ignores the stench, and the way her heart picks up for a second when his arm goes around her middle, nose burying into the comforting scent of strawberry shampoo. His favorite scent. When she wakes up, she hears Madison excitedly talking to Nick, and the scratching of forks on plates. He greets her when she slips down in old soccer sweats and a tank top, while Madison readily serves the rest of the food to him. He slides the plate to her when Madison leaves to get cleaned up. With a kiss to the cheek, he drops a small shittily wrapped box in front of her. Her eyes well up, but she refuses to let any shed. A locket with a small photo of them she always loved is nestled inside. He takes it from her while she pulls up her hair, clipping it around her neck. She leans in to kiss the corner of his mouth quickly, and continues eating with red cheeks and the slivers of something burning within her.

  …

  She’s 16 and in a house stuffed full of sweaty teenage bodies. With a skirt just coming below her ass and a a cut up shirt, she sips a cup of lukewarm beer. Her stomach is still hot with shots of rum, but she welcomes the small feeling. He’s been gone for a month again, and found herself out with friends more. Madison hardly cared, tied up with Travis and planning redecorations for the home. Her spare energy was spent on looking for Nick, not checking where her daughter was out at. Some of her friends pull her into the giant circle of spin the bottle, and when the bottle lands on her with his leering gaze, she she straddles Jared’s? No, maybe Jack’s lap, accepting the sloppy kiss with hands groping at her ass. She faintly hears cheers when she breaks the kiss, brushing the excess wetness from her chin. She gladly takes the shot from her friend as she sits back down, with the beat of the music pulsing in her head. He’s been gone for a month again, and she starts to wonder if this is it. Her fingers idly trace the shape of the locket while she stares at the ground.

  …

  It’s been 49 days, and when Madison worriedly murmurs about Nick she snorts loudly. “Maybe he’s dead, have you started on the morgues yet?” Madison begins to yell, but she ignores and heads upstairs. She can hear crying downstairs, and Travis trying to console her. With headphones pushed into her ears, she waits until she hears the door slam. They had planned to leave for the weekend anyways. She messages the guy from her English class that spends more time joking with friends than focusing on assignments to come over. Not bothering to clean up, she swings the door open to let him past. They don’t waste anytime, shedding clothes in her room quickly without bothering to close doors. Their teeth knock, and she grinds against him until he attempts to guide her head down. When she pushes him flat on the bed and straddles, roughly taking him in, she hears a door downstairs close. She whines purposefully loud, the guy all too focused on getting himself off. When Nick appears at the doorway, she rides him harder, listening to him groan while offering half assed moans in return. Their eyes meet, and he sees that same blank look that appeared four years ago. Clenching his fists he pushes into his room across the hall, hearing the guy cum shortly after.

  He leaves shortly after, and she doesn’t bother with pulling on underwear as she moves towards the shower. Snagging the towel from her door she walks briskly past Nick’s room, feeling the weight of his stare. She leans into the cool tiles of the shower once the water is running, letting it wash over her sweaty skin. Not even a minute later hands are sliding along her waist, dragging along her stomach and his mouth hot on her shoulder, nipping. “You going to let me fuck you properly baby sister?”

  She attempts to push him off, jabbing elbows back towards him weakly. Nick grabs her wrists and pins them above her head with one hand, the other pulling her hair to expose her neck. She whimpers slightly, then clenching her jaw to contain more noises from slipping out. He grins against her neck, feeling her pulse pick up from every touch. “Let go of me Nick,” she whines but tries to grind her ass against him. When he chuckles, a shiver ripples down Alicia’s spine. She pulls her arms, but his fingers grip tight enough that bruises will probably show up later.

  He sinks his teeth into her shoulder, breaking the skin and drawing blood. She can’t hold back the loud moan that follows or the wetness now slicking her thighs. “You need me to fix it don’t you ‘licia? To fuck you hard and deep? Spank you until you’re red and bruised? To make you cum?” Her knees buckle, but he’s quick to push her tight against the tiles. “Say it ‘licia. Say you want me to fix it.”

  “Fuck you,” she snaps back, desperately trying to gain friction.

  “You wish. Finish your shower.” He drops his hands from her body and slips out before she can contest.

Alicia  wrinkles her nose and moves a sore hand towards her aching cunt, but before she can brush her clit she hears him speak up. “Be a good girl, and don’t touch.” She rinses quickly, not bothering to wash her hair out.

[cxsmic-reactions]

Companions react to learning that F!SS can dance fight:

Back during the Pre-war days, Sole had a bit of a secret life. As a little girl, she excelled in gaining straight A’s with minimal effort. At the age of 10, she received all types of rewards for her brilliance and received a lot of attention to it. Attention particularly from the United States government. They were working on this new program for gifted children to be used for espionage against the Chinese government. Over the span of 8 years, Sole was transformed into a highly trained assassin. In particular, she specialized in seduction and deception. Thought her methods were a bit odd she still got the job done. After a few years, the government didn’t need her services as much and the sent her into retirement. Doing so they set her up with a fake identity and a new life, in order to protect her. The government never expected she’d meet Nate and on top of that have a baby. It was a perfect way to blend into society. 

Flashforward to present day and She still uses those skills she learned years ago. Especially now that someone had kidnapped Synth Shaun. Sole and her companion were on their way back from Diamond City to Sanctuary when a settler came running towards them. The settler had said that Shaun had been kidnapped by Gunners and it was Sole’s job to get him back. They also told them where they had taken him. It was some old abandoned hotel that Nate and she had stayed at once. On the way there they came up with a plan of attack. Sole will take care of the front while the companion sneaks around the back to let Sole in. Once they got there they quickly executed the plan, the companion ran to the back and Sole started her show. Thankfully Travis put on He's a demon He's a devil He's a doll by Betty Hutton. As the beat came on Sole started with the first guard... (link to the video example here)

Cait: “Holy shite.” was all Cait could say. The way her body moved to the sync of the music was mesmerizing and the way she took down the bad guys with style was amazing. Who knew Sole could do all that? In one song Sole took out all the guards out front without even breaking a sweat. Damn. Nevertheless, Cait had a job to do and she would be damned if she didn't complete it. Quickly taking out the guards in the back she meets up with Sole. They both make their way into the building to see the gunner leader with Shaun tied to a chair with duct tape over his mouth. Still playing the song Sole slowly makes her way to the boss taking him out instantly. After that they got Shaun untied and took him to Homeplate to rest. When they were finally done the sat down and had a drink. Almost instantly Cait popped the question of how did you do that. Once she explained Cait remarked how sexy it was and she would mind seeing that outside the battlefield.

Curie: As soon as the music starts Curie smiled, it was her favorite song after all. But they way Sole moved was the icing on the cake. How could her hips move that way? Oh boy. As soon as she was enjoying it that's when the violence came. In the blink of an eye Sole had taken down most of the security guards in the front. When Curie finally came to Sole had already taken out the guards and was standing there waiting for her. Apologizing she ran into the building after her. There weren't many guards to pick off as they made their way up to the top floor. When they had got there the gunner leader had Shaun tied up. Without hesitation Sole did her routine which ended in the mercenary’s death. After Curie finished assessing if Shaun was okay they took him back to Homeplate. Setting him down to rest Curie and Sole sat down to talk. As soon as Sole’s butt hit the seat she was firing questions at her. Like How did you do that? and Where did you learn that from? Sole would, of course, answer the girl’s questions at the best of her abilities but leaving a bit of mystery behind it. She can’t tell all the secrets you know. 

Deacon: Now Deacon is a man of mystery. There's always something you don’t know about him no matter what. And when it comes to Deacon he knows damn near everything. So when Sole started her dance it caught him completely off guard. He kinda found himself getting a little excited and impressed. Nodding his head in approval seeing Sole take down the enemies without ease. Was there nothing this woman couldn’t do he thought. His thoughts were interrupted when he saw Sole take down the last enemy with a swift kick and running towards him. “When we get back home you have to tell me how the hell you did that,” he said with a smirk as they both walked into the building. Like once before Sole used her charm to take out the enemies while Deacon took them out behind cover. Once they got to the top floor Sole worked her charm once more on the Gunner boss and ending his life almost instantly. With that, she quickly rushed over to Shaun check on his well being. After their reunion Sole took him back to Homeplate to rest and recover. When they later sat down and talked all Deacon could say was how impressed he was and if Sole could teach him to do it. Hell, he wanted to try it on Glory.

Danse: All he could think about was how inappropriate his subordinate was acting. But he would be lying if he didn't find sexy. You can catch him blushing to himself when he sees her. The way her body moved to the beat of the music was mesmerizing. Though highly inappropriate in a military way Danse couldn't help but be drawn to Sole more and more. Brushing those thoughts aside he continued his mission with Sole. With her dancing and his sniping, the enemies were quickly dispatched one by one. Once they had taken out the enemies they had made there way up to the top level. Upon coming on to the door Sole kicked it open and took down the boss. Within seconds of that, she went to check on Shaun. Reassuring that everything will be okay and that he was safe now. After checking the building for remaining enemies they made there way back to home plate to relax. Once Shaun was put down Danse started to remark how inappropriate her fighting style was. But before she could retort back he ould complement her tactical advantages and leave it at that. Maybe in the future, he could see more of those moves perhaps more privately.

Hancock: All he could think about is his impure thoughts when he saw the way Sole was guiding her hips to the music. He never saw that in the bedroom so where did it come from. It could be from her clouded past he thought still admiring the view. But as soon as the song was over Sole killed all of them in the blink of an eye. Maybe he won't ask her to see that again in private. And with that, they regrouped and stormed the building killing everyone inside. When they got to the top Sole started her dance again on the boss. Which made him a little jealous but he’ll see it later anyway. As soon as Sole took him out she was right by Shaun’s side again. Hugging on him for dear life. After a while, Shaun would ask to go home already and she would oblige and take him back to home plate. When Sole was sure that he was asleep, Hancock and she made their way to the living room. They would sit and talk about her past for a few minutes before Hancock wants to act on his thoughts. Knowing Shaun was a heavy sleeper she was cool with it.

MacCready: Blushing. All Mac could do was blush his face off. Sole sent him to higher ground so he can snipe gunners from afar. But while he was looking for enemies he spotted Sole. She was rocking her hips to the song as she twisted one of the other gunners' necks. He couldn’t lie it was hot to him. He couldn't help but blush every time she swayed. Who could blame him? Mac knew if he was in one of the guards shoes he would totally fall for it no problem. Shaking those thoughts away he returned to his duty, sniping the gunners from afar. Once they got rid of the gunners on the outside they made their way into the building. Taking down the enemies like before but this time Mac was able to see Sole do her thing up close. He could see the guards flocking to her only to end up with a bullet in the head. It was impressive to say the less. After clearing the building the made their way to the top suite. There was Shaun next to the boss with a gun to his head. Before Mac could do anything she did her dance and took him down without a fuss. Picking up Shaun they headed back to home plate. Once Shaun was out cold Mac pulled Sole aside and talked to her about what she did. Every time he would try to say something he would stutter and blush like crazy. Guess he will have to try again later.

Nick: Shocked. All he could be was shocked. What else could he be? Nick actually though Sole was an innocent woman who was in the wrong place at the wrong time. But this just changes everything. Who knew she could move her hips in that direction and be on the beat at the same time. If synths could blush right now he would be as red as a tato. After this mission, he would definitely have to talk to them about their “tactical skills”. After the gunners were taken out on the outside they made their way inside. Almost exactly how she did outside she took down the more enemies but with much more force. Once cleared they made their way up towards the top suite taking down enemies as the walked past. When they reached the suite without hesitation Sole quickly ended the boss life and ran to Shaun. After they made sure he was okay they went back to home plate. Once Shaun fell asleep Nick asked about what she did back there. He had to admit he was impressed but he told her next time she wanted to do something new to at least tell him beforehand.

Piper: Oh boy, was she trying to figure out what the hell was going on. She couldn't tell if this were some sort of prank or what. Don't get her wrong she wasn't enjoying it but it kind of seemed out of the ordinary. Like something you would read in a story or watch in a movie. Not something in real life. Even though Piper thought it was a little weird it was still pretty damn cool to see. She even thought about writing about it in the newspaper maybe an article about how cool the vault dweller is. But before that can happen they needed to save Shaun. Before long they were at the top floor and there stood a man with a gun pointed at Shaun’s head. Before Piper could say a thing Sole started to rock her hips from side to side. Making sure to keep eye contact Sole walked towards the man and practically seduced him. Once he put the gun down she killed him without hesitation. Making sure he was dead Sole then turned to Shaun and hugged him. After the reunion, they head back to home plate to chat and rest. When Shaun fell asleep Piper asked Sole if she could write an article about what happened. Agreeing Sole started to tell her story while Piper was taking notes. Man, this would be a story to remember she thought.

Preston: He was as red as a tato. He tried to look away but he couldn't. He found himself getting drawn in by her moves. He couldn't help it she was amazing at what she does. After they were sure that the enemies outside were taken care of, they regrouped. When Sole tried to talk to him couldn't make eye contact with her without stuttering and blushing. But before she could ask him about it they were attacked. Clearing the enemies in one big swoop they made their way up to the top floor. Once there they took out the boss and recovered Shaun. Returning back to home plate for Shaun to recover Sole finally confronted Preston. But every time Preston who start to talk he would stumble over his words and blush again. I guess she'll have to try again later.

X6-88: X6 knew Sole was government trained due to prior research. That was the whole reason why he was assigned to be with her. Father had asked the robotics team to come up with a courser that was trained as a spy back in the prewar days. It was a test to see if training like that would be effective in the field. Though X6 knew she was highly skilled he didn't know she was skilled in that. When he saw the way she moved and took down the enemy it was entrancing to say the less. He thought that they were both trained in basically the same way. Father did uncover training documents and videos from the building she worked at. X6 couldn't help but be impressed by her moves and he found himself being a little jealous that he didn't have training like that. Once they got into the building it was the same story but even better. She took down the gunners barley needing his help. Yeah, she definitely has to teach me some of those moves he thought.  Once they got up to the top floor she had X6 take care of the remaining gunners while she went and got Shaun. In no time they had Shaun and they were on their way back to home plate to rest and talk. When they got there Shaun went to bed immediately while Sole and X6 stayed to talk. All he could say was how impressed he was of her skill and that she had to teach him some one day.

This was both helped and requested by the lovely @electronicagirl. I hope you like it. Also, this is a link to her amazing story. Its a really good read and you guys should check it out. By the way, I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while I've been working on my summer assignments and trying to get my life together for the new school year.

[lookbluesoup]

Nate and Piper’s Fallout

@ronqueesha @viewfromthevault OKAY SINCE YOU LOVELIES AND AN ANON ASKED about the big meltdown between Nate and Piper I will now proceed to overshare thanks! If I didn’t have a gazillion billion other WIPs I’d probably have turned this into a novel by now! Lol I’m not sure if it will ever get polished enough to post online. REGARDLESS it’s important to me and I hope at least a little interesting for you all to hear about xD

THAT BEING SAID I know I have some followers who don’t like spoilers, and if I ever do finish that fic, this wordvomit is gonna be basically the entire outline. SO everything is under the cut! In contrast to most of his story, Nate’s also a bit of an ass here! Keep reading at your own peril! 😱

-------------

Nate realizes he’s in love with Piper the day he breaks into the Institute. Up until that point, finding Shaun took precedence over everything else. Nate had helped the Commonwealth a lot, but he couldn’t really start building a new life for himself while still chasing the old one.

Getting into the Institute was… disorienting, to say the least. Too clean, too organized, too friendly towards him after all the carnage he’s seen on the surface. When Father encourages Nate to stay and help make a better world, and Nate is presented with the idea of possibly having to choose between the Institute or the Commonwealth, it really tips him sideways. He starts to realize that he’s already been laying the foundation for a new beginning. On the surface. With Piper. And Preston. And Curie and Deacon and Nick and the Minutemen and the Railroad.

Father gives Nate the run of the Institute so of course Nate noses into every single nook and cranny. When a particularly friendly scientist greets Nate and conveys their hope that “the Institute can feel like home,” Nate remembers what the Institute has done to the homes of others. They talk to him about how there’s “nothing out there” on the surface. Nate thinks of Piper. Those living under Father dismiss the Commonwealth as just a dying remnant and Nate is surprised by the anger that sentiment inspires in him. The people on the surface are fighting hard to survive. He’s bled and sacrificed beside them. He sees it as arrogance for the Institute to claim having “humanity’s best interest at heart” and yet be so out of touch with humanity.

It’s Piper’s door Nate comes crashing through when he returns to the surface. It’s her advice he seeks out to come to terms with the revelation that Shaun is the Director of the Institute, and that once again, Nate’s sense of reality has been turned on its head.

He goes back and forth for a while. Father tolerates it with the expectation that once Nate gets a feel for the Institute he will make the right choice and join them. Nate has to be very careful to avoid the Watchers, who now have a vested interest in following him around. Desdemona urges Nate to maintain the charade for as long as it takes to liberate the synths. He agrees, and it’s at some point during this back and forth he and Piper come to terms with their feelings for one another.

That’s where it starts. And he and the Railroad are on the same page, 100% - except for Shaun.

Because Shaun is still Nate’s baby. And there is nothing more important to Nate than family. Even when that family is misguided.

He desperately wants to avoid escalating the conflict. After the shock wears off, he gets the idea that it might be possible to work not as a double-agent, but an ambassador between the surface and underground. If given enough time with the Institute, by earning their trust, Nate hopes to bridge the gap and bring about a cease-fire between the factions.

Piper’s initially supportive of the effort. If he can find one, a solution that doesn’t end in bloodshed and dead friends is preferable. They have a brief honeymoon of stolen moments that are carefully concealed from the Institute, for the sake of his cover. They still travel together openly as ‘friends’ and she even accompanies him to the Libertalia (where X6 manages to reclaim Gabriel) and Bunker Hill (where Nate helps the runaway synths escape and claims he was ambushed to protect his cover). So for a while, they’re still working together. And then Nate starts disappearing for longer and longer stretches of time.

Father is increasingly demanding. The ability to relay makes travelling across the Commonwealth with X6 much faster and safer than trekking across no-man’s land from Diamond City or the Castle or anywhere else. Suddenly Piper doesn’t know where he is every day, or what he’s doing, or why. She has faith in him, but the distance hurts.

And the thing is, it’s almost impossible to work and fight and live alongside a group of people without becoming sympathetic towards them in some way, especially for someone as naturally empathetic and cooperative as Nate, and especially in a situation like his where he feels compelled to be loyal at least to his son.

So Nate’s a little too optimistic. Starts making excuses, forgets that just because he might have managed to solve a conflict without violence doesn’t mean the Institute wouldn’t have preferred to choose violence themselves. (i.e. they were going to kidnap Wallace and kill the Minutemen who’d come to defend him, but that’s not an issue because Nate managed to convince Wallace to join the Institute peacefully, first.)

Nate sees a chance for real peace when Father offers him the role of Director. Piper doesn’t. It can’t be that easy when Nate’s still insisting they keep their relationship a secret for fear it might compromise his station and put them in danger. She reserves judgement at Nate’s request. But a whitewashed box underground could never be home to her; there could never be a future for them as a pair. And what else will Nate have to compromise to secure the loyalty of a group of people with such vastly different morals? Will they still take him as Director when the know how he really feels about the synths and the world above ground? If they know he intends to shut down the Retention Bureau and share technology with the Commonwealth? She just can’t see it happening.

He and Piper start arguing. Nate stops telling her about his missions. Stops telling her much of anything.

Rumours start finding their way back to her about the Institute’s meddling. Sometimes they’re violent. Sometimes informants talk about a man who sounds a bit like Nate, but Piper can’t bring herself to believe it. The stories must be exaggerated, or misinformed, because her Blue would never do those things. Not even to protect his cover. When she finally does get the chance to confront him, Nate’s evasive, leading her to believe at least some part of the stories must be true.

This straight up SUCKS for Piper because he’s doing what the others in Diamond City did. Suddenly he doesn’t want to talk, he treats her like she’s nosy. She isn’t his confidant anymore, and even worse she doesn’t know if she can trust him. All of this right after she opened her heart to him. It scares her, and when he only gives her more reasons to suspect he’s siding with the Institute - it makes her angry.

The night he breaks into Travis’s trailer to hack Diamond City radio and pick up reports from McDonough, Nate doesn’t even stop by Publick to tell Piper he’s in town. She crosses paths with him by sheer luck. He tries to wave it away with the excuse of “not wanting to upset her" and when the conversation gets heated, relays away. She’s pissed and pretty damn hurt. She takes all her collected intel and writes up an entire article condemning the “General” for his dereliction of duty, but doesn’t publish it.

After the Institute’s broadcast airs, Nate comes back to apologize. But he continues to insist the secrecy was necessary. And Piper pulls out all the stops. It’s gone too far. She doesn’t know what side he’s on. People are getting hurt, and he hardly seems to care anymore. Nate fails to realize what thin ice he’s on at first. (there IS an old draft of that fight here on my ao3!)

It gets heated, Nate tries to use protecting Piper as an excuse, which she will have absolutely none of, and then Nate takes a shot at her paper and tries to end the fight by insisting she just isn’t able to understand. Which he realizes, immediately, is a step too far. But the damage is already done. Piper compares Nate to Kellogg, and honestly stabbing him probably would have hurt less, kicks him out of her house, and it looks like it’s over between them.

Nate returns to the Institute wounded and angry. Father takes note of how distracted Nate seems, which prompts Nate to expose his frustration at Piper and her lack of understanding. Father remembers meeting her after the botched Battle of Bunker Hill and dismisses her small mind. Her troublemaking attitude has no place in the new future.

Nate spends the next few days going through the motions. It would be easier to just agree with Shaun and dismiss Piper’s challenge as nothing but ignorance. But that doesn’t sit quite right. Losing her is a harsh blow and her accusations weigh on Nate.

Karma’s pretty swift. Father comes to Nate with an ultimatum. The Railroad has to be put down. Shaun reveals he’s known all along about Nate’s history of involvement with them, and that it’s the last thing standing in the way of proving his loyalty. Nate tries to negotiate, and then outright refuses to kill his friends. Father stops playing nice. He orders Nate to destroy the Railroad. Realizing it’s the end of the line, Nate reverts to the old military, “Yes, sir.” but there’s a chasm in his heart. He has to choose. He can’t wait it out any longer. And Piper was right.

On the way back to his room, his synth informant warns him that the Brotherhood has also tracked the Railroad down, and are on their way to destroy the church. Choosing Shaun would be as easy as doing nothing at all. But Nate relays to Hanover Street and hits the ground running, knowing full well he’ll never set foot inside the Institute as an ally again.

Piper, meanwhile, had come to the conclusion that she couldn’t keep Nate’s waffling loyalty a secret from the Railroad any longer. She had traveled to HQ to inform Des her Agent might be compromised. And it’s about that time Nate comes crashing through the door wild-eyed with his desperate warning.

They’ve definitely had better reunions.

[actuallykiwi]

That Time Nick Asked Annie to Dance

The sun was setting over the city. 

Nick was enjoying a few minutes break in the walkway outside the agency. It’s not that they were terribly busy, but like he always said, “There’s always another case to close.” Ellie was inside organizing the files from the past few cases they had worked on. One of them, the most recent one, was closed just a couple days ago. It was one of the many that didn’t have a happy ending. 

She paused as she came across it. Her small fingers brushed over the name on the front of the file, and then over the large, burning red stamp: CLOSED. The red ink hadn’t even dried yet. She sighed and stacked it in its proper place with the others before gently placing them in a filing cabinet and deciding to join the detective outside. 

Nick was taking a long slow drag of his cigarette when his assistant leaned on the wall beside him, her head hanging low. “The cases that end in death are always the hardest to push past,” she muttered. He nodded somberly. “And unfortunately all to common.” He watched the smoke swirl in front of him as Ellie lifted her head slightly towards him. “Do you think she’s okay? She’s been gone a couple days now. She normally bounces back so quick...” Nick took one more drag before stomping the cigarette butt into the ground below. “She’s in mourning, Ellie. She just lost someone very close to her.” He sighed. “But you’re right, I am beginning to get a little worried about her. She would’ve normally let us know she’s gonna be okay by now.” “Should we go visit her? She lives right outside of town, right?” Ellie asked, gesturing toward the direction their friend lived in. He thought for a moment before thoughtfully rubbing his chin. “That might be a good idea. She could probably use some company now that she’s had time to grieve.” She smiled and stood straight up. “Tell ya what. You go spend some time with her and I’ll make some dinner and bring it by in a little bit. Sound good?” Nick chuckled. “And how long have you had this planned exactly?” She winked before walking back toward the agency. “Oh, a couple days or so.” 

It had never really dawned on him until he was walking out the city gate into the Fens; the whole city was quieter and a little gloomier without her around. Everyone had gotten so used to her smile, her laugh, the goofy faces she always made, and although they didn’t always enjoy them, her awful jokes. It had only been two days, but it’s as if Diamond City had a little storm cloud over it. The city needed its sunshine back. It’s not that she wasn’t there anymore, she literally lived just northeast of the city, about a block away. But she hadn’t actually been in the city since the incident, and it showed. Nick felt a small sense of dread that she might not be home, or if she was that he might find something awful. This thought quickened his pace, and he rounded the large green wall of the city to her makeshift apartment. One of the DC guards made his patrol in front of her building just as Nick approached. He tried not to appear worried as he asked if she was home. The guard nodded and continued, and Nick approached her door. 

He took a deep breath before gently knocking. “Annie? It’s Nick.” He waited for a moment but there was no response. He tried not to imagine the worst as he reached for the doorknob, but paused when he heard muffled music playing towards the back of the building. Nick carefully scaled the side of the building where the music grew louder until he reached the back deck. It was a small concrete porch of sorts. An old red pre-war grill restored to almost-working order sat to the far right away from the building. Against the back wall to the left rested a few wooden lounge chairs, freshly painted bright blue and yellow.  A tiny fire pit glowed warmly in the center near an equally small table with a radio on it, the source of the music, playing DC Radio. This was surrounded by a few also-freshly painted lawn chairs, one of which filled Nick with relief. In it sat Annie curled up in fetal position, watching the fire flicker over the old newspapers piled within, a fire poker by the legs of the chair. 

He smiled to himself as he watched the light dance in the strands of her blonde hair. As he carefully approached her left side, he noticed her eyes were red and puffy, and she had small bags under them. She remained unmoved until he was mere feet away from her and he gently cleared his throat. “Nice night for a barbecue.” She squealed and jumped into a straight sitting position, quickly swiping her glasses off and rubbing furiously at her eyes. “N-Nick! I-I’m sorry, I wasn’t expecting you to come over! Uh, how have you been?” She sniffed and flashed him a brilliant smile that would’ve been believable if her eyes weren’t so swollen and oh-so-strikingly blue from all the tears. He shrugged and scooted a chair closer to her before taking a seat. “Ah, little tired from the influx of cases to solve, but... I’m more concerned about you to be honest. How you holdin’ up?” Annie replaced her glasses and laughed sadly. “I’m... okay. Hangin’ in there, you know?” Nick studied her for a moment. Not in the way he usually did when no one was looking, but in the way he did when he was trying to figure out a client’s true emotions. “It’s okay to not be okay, Annie. You don’t have to wait to show your feelings behind closed doors. It’s not human to be happy all the time.” He flashed her a sideways grin to show he was teasing. “It helps to mourn with friends, people you trust. If anything, that makes your bright happy side all the more enjoyable- not that it’s not enjoyable, mind you.” She laughed again and nodded. “I know. I just wanted some time to, sort things out, you know?”

She sighed and her smile slowly faded as she sunk in her seat. “It’s just... Nick, I’ve traveled all this way to find him. I chased down every clue he left behind over two states away, ever since he ran away from home. Days turned into weeks, weeks into months, and when I finally find him-” Her breath caught and Nick placed a worried hand on her knee. She bit her lip as a tear escaped down her cheek. “I’ve come all this way. I had so much hope that I was going to bring him home, or at least we’d be together. I put this apartment together so we could have a place to stay, catch up, but now he’s... my brother is...” She covered her mouth as her emotions overcame her, and Nick embraced her as she quietly began to sob. “I know, doll, I know. But you don’t have to go through this alone. We’re all here for you.” She gripped the back of his trench coat in response as he just held her for a while. He couldn’t help but think back to about a year ago when Sole was going through a similar situation. They also thought losing a loved one was something they had to face alone, and Nick had told them the same thing. He wasn’t as close to them as he was to Annie, though, and he didn’t hold them like he was holding her now. 

After a few minutes, Annie finally took a deep breath and Nick released her as she sat up and rubbed at her face again. “Thank you,” was all she said as she sat back in her seat, folding her glasses and tucking them into her jacket pocket. They just sat for a while, Annie taking a deep breath every now and then to calm down. They both perked up a little when Travis popped in on the radio. 

“Good evening, Diamond City! Hope you all are doing well tonight, but that especially goes out to Little Miss Sunshine! You’ve all heard her on here once or twice to brighten up your day a little, but she’s been feeling a little blue lately. We’re all here for you, Annie! Bring us back that smile real soon!” 

Annie and Nick both let out a small chuckle and she bashfully tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “See? We all miss ya back home.” Nick reassured her, and she smiled. “I’ll come back soon, I promise.” He smiled back as the next song played melodically through the old radio. 

I’ve got the blues, I feel so lonely

I’d give the world, if I could only

Make you understand...

Nick thought for a moment before getting up to his feet and standing in front of her, good hand reached out towards her expectantly. “May I have this dance?”

Annie blinked before grinning and taking his hand. “Absolutely. Hope you don’t mind having a few toes squished though, I’m not a good dancer.” He lead her over to the empty space of the deck. “Well,” he placed a careful hand on her waist as hers found his shoulder, “good thing I am.” 

Baby, won’t you please come home?

Baby, won’t you please come home? 

I have tried in vain...

Nick carefully lead her through basic waltzing steps for a while, making sure his toes were avoided. It didn’t always work though; her boots still somehow collided with his feet, which was followed by frantic apologies and laughs from both sides. Eventually, though, she got the hang of it, and they danced smoothly from then on. 

Baby, won’t you please come home? 

Cause your momma’s all alone... 

Once he was sure she had it down, he took her right hand above her and she spun for him, giggling all the while and causing him to laugh as she was spun back into his arms. At one point, he took both her hands and they both twisted around, which lead both of them into a fit of laughter. Now both her arms draped his shoulders and his her waist, both of them smiling at each other as they swayed softly to the ending of the song. 

Baby, won’t you pleeeease come home!

“There’s that smile.” Nick said softly to her. Annie smiled widely up at him and tip-toed to give him a hug, which he happily returned. “Hope the dancing stirred up an appetite!” They turned to see a mischievously grinning Ellie approach with a large tray of food, which she carefully placed on the table by the radio. “Ellie!!” Annie exclaimed and ran to hug her friend. Ellie laughed and patter her on the back. “Glad to see you’re back!” She laughed and met Nick’s eyes behind her. Nick was grinning from ear to ear, and maybe it was the light from the fire, but she could have sworn if he was human he would be blushing. 

{Song: Baby Won’t You Please Come Home- Bessie Smith}

[nicklangfordmuse]

“ i don’t see an engagement ring… you single? ”

Nick didn't mean to stalk her or anything, he was just merely doing his job properly. Keeping his hood on and a low profile, he waited for Katrina to enter the bar. Waiting for about a few minutes, he went inside, without getting anyone's attention. The bar was only half full so there were only three people sitting by the eight-chair bar counter side — one of them being his new neighbor, Katrina.

Taking the seat two chairs away from the girl, Nick ordered a glass of scotch. Even without looking at her, he knew the girl was occupied by her mobile phone, probably waiting for a call, or even a message from someone. He needed to get her attention so he had to think of a question. What would be appropriate in a bar but wouldn't get him kicked out?

"I don't see an engagement ring. You single?" He asked, hoping he didn't come off as desperate.

Katrina had to quickly glance at her finger, chuckling as she turned her body to him. "Not...really. I'm in a relationship, though." She quickly explained. She was about to turn away again when she suddenly saw his Red Sox varsity jacket, which got her really curious. "You play or are you a fan?" She asked.

Nick looked down at his jacket, remembering paying $85 for the attire he's not exactly a fan of. He'd like to think he can get it reimbursed since it's for work. "Not a player and not a fan, actually. My friend brought me to the game last week and I needed to bring home something so I wouldn't feel like I wasted my money on a game I never really understood."

Katrina laughed at his explanation. "You don't understand the game? How did you survive physical education in high school?" She asked teasingly and Nick chuckled along.

"Basketball. I'm a basketball guy." He explained with a light laugh. "Why? Are you a big fan?"

She nodded proudly, showing him the pendant on her necklace. "My boyfriend and I met at a game so...it's quite special to me." She told him before recognizing the guy's face. "Wait. You're my new neighbor, right? From apartment 3B?" She asked for confirmation.

Nick smiled, finding his perfect opening to get to know the girl more. "Right. The girl from 3C? You have great speakers, by the way. The bass broke my mother's pictured frame." He added, chuckling with Katrina laughing along.

"Oh my goodness, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. We were having a girls night. I promise I'll have it replaced." She assured him, thinking of another way to make it up to him. "How about a drink? Let me refill your scotch and drink with me." She offered, already signaling for the bartender to refill his drink, and to Nick to sit beside him.

Going over, Nick took the refill and thanked the bartender. Turning to Katrina, he had to start his job as a secret agent and ask the deeper questions to get his work started. "I just hope your boyfriend wouldn't get mad when he gets here and sees us sitting together."

"Trust me, he wouldn't." She said, sighing as she drank her ice cold beer. "We're kind of in a long distance relationship. We only see each other 4 or 5 days a month. I consider myself lucky if it's a week."

"Why? Does he live in a different country?" He asked, keeping the answers in his notes in his head.

Katrina shook her head at him. "He's a business man so he travels a lot. And I saw him last week so I'm pretty the next time I'll see him is in about another 4 weeks from now." She added, taking a big gulp of her beer. "I'm Katrina, by the way. Welcome to the neighborhood." She told him, extending her hand to his and Nick gladly shook it.

"I'm Nick. Nice to meet you and...thank you for the warm...but loud welcome." He teased, glad that he's taken a good step to get his work started. If he wanted to get a closer look at Mr. Travis Boyd's questionable business, he needed to be close to his girlfriend, and now, Nick's new neighbor.

[docsamurai]

Let’s Kill Hitler - Chapter 1

Don’t know how long this is going to be, but I got a rather fun idea at lunch today and by the time I made it home after work I knew I needed to turn it into at least a short story. There’ll probably be at least another couple of chapters, enjoy though.

For the 4th time in the last hour George checked his phone in a futile attempt to will a signal to appear from out of nowhere. Obviously he wasn’t going to find wifi in Cleveland in the 1920s but he still checked, mostly out of habit. George went back to doing situps in his cell, wracking his brain in a desperate attempt to find some way to fix all of this. The sergeant was leaning back in his chair, half asleep with his feet propped up on his desk. Without opening his eyes the sergeant groaned and shifted in his seat. “Keep it down in there chink.”

George sat on the thin, threadbare mattress and rubbed the bridge of his nose where he could feel a headache coming on. It had only been a day since he woke up hungover in the middle of the street over a hundred years in the past, but it felt like a lifetime. The door to the holding area swung open and bald man in a crisp black suit carrying a briefcase walked in startling the sergeant out of his nap. The frowning man looked around the station before finally locking eyes with the sergeant who was lurching to his feet. “Who in the hell-“

The bald man opened his jacket to show his badge before extending a hand towards the sergeant “Officer Donnely. Travis Coal, FBI. I’m here to collect Mr. Li who it appears you have in custody.” The sergeant looked at the FBI agent and down at the extended hand, not fully comprehending what was happening. Cautiously Sergeant Donnely finally took the offered hand and went to get the key to the holding cell. Donnely stopped in front of the cell, the key in his hand before a thought occurred to him and he turned back to Agent Coal. Before Donnely could say anything Agent Coal held up a hand and cut him off. “I’ve already filed the transfer paperwork, your captain signed off on it a moment ago. The sooner I have Mr. Li, the sooner I can let you get back to your… work.”

Donnely’s jaw flexed as his temper flared at the Agent’s implied insult but he sighed and let it go. Shrugging Donnely unlocked the cell door and slid it open with a heavy clank. The color drained from George’s face as he realized his day was going from bad to worse. Having to put up with racist police was bad enough, but now federal agents were getting involved and somehow they already knew his name. “I swear, I didn’t do anything. I’m just trying to get…” George’s voice trailed off as Agent Coal’s frown deepened and he brought out a pair of handcuffs. Sergeant Donnely trudged back to his desk and propped his feet up again as Agent Coal led George out of the station and into the back of a car waiting outside.

Travis Coal sighed and unlocked the handcuffs before climbing into the driver’s seat. The agent pulled a phone out of his inner jacket pocket and swiped through a few screens as he muttered under his breath. “For fucks sake George, did you have any kind of goddamn plan?” George sat wide eyed in the back seat stammering through his excuses before a realization finally clicked. “Wait, you’re from the future too?” Travis glanced meaningfully down at the phone in his hand and before giving George a withering glare. “What gave it away?” Travis sighed and scratched a patch of stubble on the back of his head. “Yes, moron, I’m from the future. I’m not with the FBI though I do work for the government, specifically the Bureau of Time Traveler Affairs.”

George gave Travis a blank stare and shrugged, Travis grunted in response and started the car. “Short version: it’s my job to come back and rescue idiots like you who get the bright idea to try and time travel and get stuck. I gotta say it’s usually only white guys that are dumb enough to do this.” Travis put the Chevy series FB in gear and pulled out into traffic. “We just need to get far enough out of town to open up a return portal without causing a commotion and then we can get back to our own time.”

George started to reach for his phone again out of habit before sheepishly sliding it back in his pocket and shifting in his seat. “Am I going to be in trouble?” Travis looked back at him and let his frown soften a bit. The guy was an idiot but he was in over his head and at least he wasn’t being a jackass about it. “A little bit. The time lab your friend worked for isn’t happy but nothing got broken so they’re not pressing charges. There’s some fines for misuse of a Time Portal and you’ll also need to cover the cost of the tests we’re going to have to run to make sure we didn’t pick up any diseases that are supposed to be dead but you’re not going to jail or anything.”

A long moment of silence passed as George fidgeted in the back seat before Travis finally pulled his phone out and opened a recording app. “We’ll have to take a statement anyway so we might as well do it now. Please state your name and date of birth for the record.” “George Li. August 2nd 2007” “We recorded a time portal between June 18th 2032 and June 18th 1923, is it correct that you went through that portal and went back to that timeline?” “Yes.” “The current local time is 18:00 on June 19th 1923 meaning you have been in the past for approximately 18 hours. Is that accurate?” “Yes.” “During that time did you make any significant alteration to the timeline? For instance, have you possibly impregnated anyone or killed anyone?” “…No.”

Travis glanced back at George and stopped the recording. “You paused there. If something happened I need to know about it. I don’t care what it was, I just need to know for the record.” George shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “I was kinda drunk when I got here. I don’t remember hooking up, but it could have happened.” Travis cleared his throat. “Any deaths? Even accidental ones? Again, I just need to know for our records.” George shook his head. Travis nodded and resumed the recording. “In your own words, what was your purpose in time travelling?”

“So I was out with my friend Nick, the guy who worked at the time lab, and he was telling me about how they had a time machine. I didn’t believe him, but he kept telling me how they used it all the time for boring nerd crap like research. We had a few beers, then some shots, and he asked me if I wanted to use the time machine at the lab and go ‘do some wild west shit’. I told him that I always wanted to kill Hitler. Next thing I know I’m waking up a hundred years in the past with a hangover.”

Travis groaned and shook his head. “Of course you did. That’s all for now.” Travis tapped the button on his screen and turned off the recording. They drove in silence the rest of the way to the outskirts of town where they found an empty field. Travis parked the car and opened the back door to find George crying in the back. “Oh come on, that’s really unnecessary.” George sniffled and drew a shuddering breath. “Please man, I can’t go to prison! I just wanted to do something good and then I got drunk and next thing I know I’m stuck in a weird time and I don’t know where I am and my phone didn’t work and I didn’t know how to get home and-“

Travis raised his hands, cutting George off. “It’s fine, you’re not going to prison, I already told you that. Just calm down. Besides if we were going to lock up every person who went back in time to kill Hitler we’d have to build a much bigger jail.” George stopped hyperventilating and his brow furrowed as he thought about what Travis said. “Wait, so other people tried to kill Hitler too? How come no one got him?”

Travis pulled up his suit sleeve and started tapping buttons on a device on his wrist. “Tried and succeeded for the most part. Lots of people have done it. Hell I’ve done it. Killing Hitler is a common enough time travel situation we literally use it as part of basic training for Time Agents.” Travis looked up to see George standing dumbfounded with his head cocked to the side and his mouth hanging open. Travis sighed and smiled slightly at George. “Ah, so here’s the thing, time travel doesn’t work the way you think it does. It’s called Multiverse Theory. When you go back in time and change something, you’re not changing your own timeline. Let’s say you somehow made it all the way to Germany, found Hitler, killed him and then came back to your own time. In your original time nothing would have changed. Hitler would still be dead, just at the time he was supposed to be dead. The alternate reality you created when you travelled back in time would have a dead Hitler and then history would change from there, but only in that alternate reality.

George leaned against the hood of the car and looked off into the distance. “So it wouldn’t mean anything?” Travis shrugged “Nothing we do really means anything. There’s infinite realities out there so every choice we make, whether it’s big or small, what you have for lunch or whether or not you kill Hitler, there’s another reality out there where you made a different decision.” George’s shoulders slumped as he thought about what he just heard. “That’s big man.” Travis nodded and patted George on the shoulder. “I know, it’s a lot to take in. Personally I find it’s best to just focus on the now and be a good person.

Travis checked the map on his phone and hit one more button on the device on his wrist and a dark swirling portal opened in front of them. “Come on, let’s go home.” George continued to lean against the car, deep in thought. “Come on George, the portal is only going to be open for a few more minutes and if we don’t go now it’ll take hours for it to charge back up.”

George looked back at Travis, a strange look in his eye and a big grin on his face. “Hey, it’s Travis right? Can I call you T?” “I’d really rather you didn’t” “Cool, so hey bro, it doesn’t matter what we do here right? Like I could go kill Hitler and it wouldn’t change anything? And we can use that thing on your wrist to get us back home any time right?” Travis groaned and shook his head “Oh no, I see where this is going.” George jumped off the car and clapped his hands “C’mon bro, I’ve always wanted to kill Hitler. He’s Hitler! History’s greatest monster! And if we get in trouble we can just use your portal thing to escape. I promise I’ll go back as soon as we’re done and whatever fines I’ve gotta pay it’ll be worth it.”

The portal wavered for a moment, catching Travis’ eye. Travis looked into the swirling energies of time and sighed. “George, listen to me. We have no IDs, no food, no money, no weapons and we’re 4000 miles away from Germany. There’s infinite possibilities yeah, but I’d really rather not be in one of the ones where I die a hundred years and a thousand miles from home. Besides, what exactly would we gain from going through all the trouble of killing Hitler? It’s been done!”

George grinned and practically bounced on the balls of his feet. “C’mon man. You’re all smart and shit, I’m sure between the two of us we can figure it out. Besides, It’ll be a fun story.” Travis tapped a button on his wrist and the portal closed. “You’re lucky you’re cute.” George’s grin got even wider and he rushed forward to give Travis a hug. “You’re the best bro!” Travis got back in the car and started the engine. “Alright, you win, let’s go kill Hitler.”

[thelouisianauproar]

Louisiana Uproar - Chapter 18

Summary: In the Season 3 opener, Dottie is unhappy with the mob’s disrespect of legitimate business; A misstep in a smuggling deal leads to a run in with the law. 

New Bordeaux, Louisiana  March of 1971.

I wake up in my penthouse in the Downtown District. I’m not alone so I try to sneak out of the bed, to not wake my girlfriend, Nicki Burke.

The penthouse, above the Royal Hotel, belongs to me now. Below my penthouse, is my office.  I have a small team now. A legitimate team reports to me. New Bordeaux is a different city since we came into power.

I can smell the aroma of coffee, when I come out of the shower.

“I was trying to let you sleep in.” I comment, taking a seat at the kitchen.

“I was trying to sleep in.” She comments, taking a seat at the kitchen.

“That’s alright.” Nicki says. “I should see how things went without me, before Mr. Balsamo wants my attention.” We just got back from vacation in Washington D.C. We told my dad and step mother that she is my roommate.

Alma once joked that we are “New Bordeaux’s worst kept secret”. One of the smartest women on the team, and she’s my girlfriend.

“What’s on your agenda for today?” “Just some catch up.” I sign and take a drink.

“I miss D.C.” She admits. I don’t, but she really seems to enjoy being places where nobody knows her. To me, it’s just a new opportunity to have a stranger call me a nigger.

“We’ll go back soon, babe.” I finish my meal and kiss her cheek. “Start thinking about where next.” I feel her arms hug me. She kisses the nape of my neck.

“Can’t you be a little late?”

I really enjoy Nicki Burke. She’s my sense of normalcy, or my crack of sunlight.

“I want to be.” I start, “but, I have some things that need my attention.” I rub her sides.

“I’ll see you tonight.” We share a kiss before she lets me go.

My commute to the office is not long. In fact, it’s right down the hall to my bedroom. It looks like Camille left some documents on my desk. There are several notes for me.

“Camille, I’m here.” I say, after pressing the intercom.

“Welcome back.” After a few moments, Camilly pokes her head in.

“Hey, how’s it going?” She takes a seat at my desk. “Just another Thursday.” “You sound like your father.” “That scares me.” She’s got a notepad in her hand. “You’ve got a call with Ron Gleason to discuss the restaurant at noon. Travis Cole at 1 pm call. Betty, whenever you want her.” “Cole?” “I left the report he sent.” I take a look at the big file. It looks like a few drawn up pictures of a building.

“Mr. Saggio asked me to let him know when you get in, so expect a call from him.” She pauses.

“It sounds like I have a day ahead of me. Thank you.” My phone rings. “Dottie Jetson’s office.” Camille answers. “Mr. Saggio.” She whispers. I gesture for her to give me the phone. “Morning, Ray.” “Welcome back. Did you and Nicki have a good time?” “Yes, yes actually we did. Thank you.” “Great.” I start a cigarette and wait for the rest of it. “Let me tell you. While you were gone, we had a snafu with the Feds---Lieutenant Sterling.”

“What happened?” “Southdowns got caught by an officer who thought he’d made the big leagues.” He says. “They silenced the guy but now he thinks we’re testing him.” “Do you need to tell them how to do their jobs?” “I’ll handle them. You handle the outside world.” He says, “I told him that you’ll have dinner with him tonight, at 7.”

“That’s just great.” I sigh slightly. “Why didn’t you let Camille know that? You spoke with her.”

“And share that?” “Ray, what about you?” “Things are fine over here.” He says, “I’d suggest you get caught up. Faster than you are.” He hangs up.

That’s my job. I handle the outside world for the Don. I’m his gatekeeper, his hired muscle, and his ear---along with Raymond, and Morty. He and Mortimer handle his underground life. I mind his legit business.

While appreciable, Don Danna’s investments never make as much as his underground. It’s not like the politicians, the police chief, the CEO’s care. I just have to keep them comfortable, and launder Danna’s money. I’ve bought and started “The Jetson Organization”. Currently, I have the Scaletta’s Ristorante, in two locations: River Row and the Del ray Hollow. I bought out an independent shop, and funded their renovation.

Between my business with “Cavar Construction” and “Frazier & Associates”, we’re going to make New Bordeaux livable again.

“Camille. If you’ve spoken with Janice on Danna’s schedule. I’d love to hear it.” “I will by the end of your meeting.” “Let’s make that first thing you ladies do, now.”

“Yes.” I move back to looking at the documents that Mortimer sent over.

“Ms. Jetson.” Ron comes through. He nods to me. Mr. Gleason started his previous restaurant with his family. They had great turn out, but when they refuse to kick up to Marcano; he was sure to bully them out of business.

I kept him as director of both restaurants. I had to. He was the only one who could speak to me. Past experiences with Marcano made them fear me.

“Ron.” I stand. “Great to see ya.” “You too. I hear you and your roommate just got back from D.C.”

“We did.” “Nice destination?” “No. I’m from D.C.” I gesture for him to take a seat. “It was nice to visit family. What can I do for you?”

“First, everything besides this is fine. But you and I have had some conversations about how we see the restaurant’s image.” We have.

“I’m having some trouble in River Row.” “What kind of trouble?” “The union members keep starting trouble there.” He starts. I sigh. This keeps happening. They come in for the happy hour deals and get rowdy. I remember them doing it, a few times, when I worked there. It didn’t happen as often, they respected Vito Scaletta.

“Got any names?” “It’s not a particular person. They get drunk, get offensive.” He says, “It’s getting to the point that we only serve Union Members.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.” I look out of my window at the view of the street. “I told you, I had security for you, what’s going on there?” “They’re friends.” He forces out. I believe him, but I don’t want to. “Mr. Gleason, you’re telling me that security detail is giving special treatment to the union workers?” “Yes, they tell us that they will handle it, but then we see the same person two or three more times.” There’s no room for that. “Let’s stay in touch on this. Thank you for telling me.” I walk back to the desk. “I’ll get moving on this.”

“Thank you, Ms. Jetson.”

“Hey.” I say at the telephone, outside of the restaurant.

“Hey babe.” Nicki says,

“I don’t have long.” I start, “I’m having dinner with Lieutenant Sterling in a bit. How are you?” I’m trying to skip the subject.

“Again?” She hates that guy.

“Nick. This is only the second time.” I sigh. I don’t want to fight about this. “If other people would do their jobs, he’d have nothing to complain about.” “Who is it? I wanna bitch them out for getting caught.” This makes me laugh. “At least it isn’t your boys.” I’d better take my place. “I’ll see you tonight.” We hang up and I take a seat at our VIP booth. I order my drink and start a cigarette.

“Are you my reward for letting Danna’s boys go?” Sterling starts. “I’m your apology.” I gesture for him to take a seat. “It is my honor to take you out some time.” “You’re too kind to me.” “How are you day?”

For the most part, it feels like my job is to be a therapist, a celebrity interviewer, or a negotiations specialist to our partners. For Sterling, I’m a celebrity interviewer. I ask him about his career and his life, this appeases him. Everyone once in a while, he gives good information pertaining to business.

“I really should apologize to you, Lieutenant.” I say, once he’s had a few drinks in him. “You really have been so kind to us.” “Then why do I feel like Ray is testing me?”

‘He’s not.” I say, “In fact, we’re talking about stricter routines after that.” That’s a lie, but not worth looking into.

“That’s good to hear.” He drinks. “I know Dannas making money over there. We all want that, visitors, businesses-”

“We’re still so new after Marcano.” “Now, HE was covert.” “He was also selling people.” I shrug. There’s a silence between us. Sterling breaks out with an evil laugh. He came up in the Marcano days. He thinks it gives him a leg up with Danna.

“It’s kill or be killed world.” He respects the old ways. “You know that, if you’re people were half as...industrious as you are. We wouldn’t be in this mess.” How does this make any sense? This is the reason Nicki hates him.

“Welcome home.” Nicki greets me. “How was dinner?” “Uneventful.” I start to undo my blouse. Nicki is already in bed and reading the “Jet” magazine “How was the first day back?” I plop on my side of the bed. “It was fine.” She starts. “Everything was right where I left it. Ray is talking about looking at some new territory.” “He loves shiny things.”

“Should he slow down?” “I don’t know.” I look at her. My girlfriend helps me undress. “They love money, but aren’t great with sustaining.”

“Red River is fine. Speaking of, I’m going out there after the meeting.” My shoes drop to the floor.

“I’ll see what Mort thinks about it.”

“Thanks.” She pauses. “Dottie, is it still an idea to license the moonshine?” “It’s an idea. Last time, I got shot down.” She knows that. Mort decided we could make more money running it illegally. If we go legit with it, we have to follow government regulations. “I know your stuff is good. I serve it.” Can we please stop talking about work?”

“Thank you.” She pushes out. “Your stepmother called to make sure we got in okay.” “Did she want us to send more moonshine?” I joke. “Lord knows how much she enjoyed it.” We both chuckle thinking of the image of Martha getting drunk after dinner.

---

The first thing in the morning, I’m off the Frisco to meet with everyone. First, it’s the meeting before the meeting.

“Hey.” I take a seat next to Morty. We are at the Retrousse Yacht club.

“Welcome back.” Morty smiles. “Get those documents I sent ya?” “I did. New district, huh?” “Yeah.” He makes a dance. “Danna’s not gonna be happy until he owns all of Louisiana.” This is biting at me. “Just say it, Dot.”

“Is it just me or is he paying attention to you all?” I start. “When I’m trying to get a signature---he’s nowhere to be found.” “Dot, that’s why you have executive permissions.” He says, “Danna didn’t imagine being Don. Handling politicians, romancing people.” Morty pauses. “You need to recognize that. Fix your face.” “Morty.” We are always honest with each other. He and Ray have both seen my difficulties with getting respect from Danna. A part of my wonders if they care, either, as long as I’m keeping the feds off their business.

“Hey, kids.” Ray greets and takes a seat at our table. “Morning.”

“See any of you political friends in Washington D.C?” “I didn’t want to see anyone.” “Fair enough.” He says, “if you’re ready to begin, so am I.”

The meeting is a basic overview of what was going on for the under bosses. From there Ray, Morty, and I would provide a higher level overview.

“As I mentioned, previously. We have a running account opened at the shooting range in the Bayou.” Morty says, “Up until the end of March. We urge you and your men to take advantage of that.” “It’s very important to me that we are one of the biggest and strongest armies.” The Don speaks. “For those who choose not to take advantage, you have my full support to impose consequences.”

“There you have it.” Ray nods. “With that, I give the floor back to Ray.” Morty gestures to him. “With no further words from the Don.” Ray pauses and Danna says nothing. “Alright. Have a good day, everyone, and let’s go make some fucking money.” His catch phrase. Every one starts to disperse. I make eye contacts with the Don. I watch Alma. I need to talk to her.

“Alma. May I have a word, please?” “Dottie. Long time, no see.” “It’s amazing how time flies” “Yeah.” She offers a cigarette. She’s right. We all see each other at meetings like these. My job is so detached from them. With the exception of Nicki, I don’t speak with them unless we need to.

“I’ll make this quick. I got rather disturbing about the Ristorante.” I say, “In river Row. I’m having issues with union workers getting drunk and causing issues, again.” “Oh, I did not know that was a problem again.” “That’s why I am bringing this to your attention.” “No, I was not aware that it was a problem for them to get drunk at a bar.” “A restaurant, Alma. It is when it scares other working patrons and staff. Yes, it is a problem.”

“It’s River Row, what else is there?” “Alma.” I take a step forward. “I hired your muscle to keep things safe. You don’t want me to pull out my support.” “I will look into it.” She concedes. “Thank you.”

“Look who is home in time for dinner.” Nicki comments. “I thought I was cooking for one.” “Surprise!” I say, sarcastically. “So are you heading to your office or should I set about place at the table?” “Another place, please?” “Great.” She walks up to me and kisses my lips. “How was your day?”

“It was alright. Had no idea the training was a mandate.” She turns back to dinner. “Enzo had me go through the logs.” She pauses. “He really think-” “He wants us to take over Louisiana.” I say, “That means we have to be strong enough to fight for it.” I take a seat at our dinner table.

“I am all for expanding.” She says, “I feel like half of our job is preparing for battle. Preparing for...something.” There is a silence between us as I think of her point. “What about you?”

“Oh you know, I spent the day talking to a brick wall.” “That good?” She chuckles. “I’m sorry, Dot. He doesn’t pay attention to you, he limits you.”

“Nicki. I need a work related favor.” “And what can I do for you?” She brings two places to the table. “I need two of your men to hang outside of the Ristorante in River Row. Tell what they see. With the union members, or Alma’s guys.” “You want us to spy?” “If I choose the haitians, they would know.” She’s silent. “It’s bad for business and I’m really trying to expand, here.”

“What’s going on?” “Union members getting drunk, scaring patrons, and security giving them a pass. I just need to know.”

“Fine.”

“Thank you. My day is already so much better.” “Great. Can we eat now?”

[sprinklesandsugarcubes]

Sway

Fandom: Fear The Walking Dead Pairing: Troy Otto x Reader (Past Nick Clark x Reader) Words: 3,161 Rating: NSFW, 18+ Only, Fluff/Smut Warning: angst, cursing, mention of character death, smut!, AU- where Luciana gets well quicker and the Ranch has parties, lol. Part: (1/2) Part 2- Smut! Request: Anon: Hi! I’m so glad I found another Troy lover! Do you take requests? If you do, could you do something a bit fluffy? Something where reader used to be with Nick but he left and gets with Luciana so she’s pissed. Troy wants her and plans to make her his, maybe something with Crazier by TSwift? Smut optional, but I wouldn’t mind! *winks* Thanks, love your writing!

You sat at the table, hardly listening as Madison spoke with a few of the Ranch’s parents, couples who had learned the woman previously made a living by counseling children at a Los Angeles High School. They were speaking to her about a therapy program, recruiting her really, to help the children of Broke Jaw Ranch come to terms with what exactly lay in wait outside the fences. Sure, they were “preppers” as some endearingly called them, but they had never prepared their children for the dead coming back to life, and hunting the living.

Their words fell on deaf ears as you stared out across the yard, the typical eating commune transformed into something fit for a party. Paper decorations and fairy lights hung from low hanging branches and string wound between the trees, multiple fire pits were positioned strategically for both warmth and their flickering flamelight, and an actual cake had been baked, with real frosting scripted across the sugary topping, ‘Happy 32nd Anniversary’ it read.

You didn’t know the couple that had made it so long personally, you’d had little time to meet all the residents of the ranch in the four days you had been living upon their soil. Still, you raised a glass in toast to them, ignoring the lurching pain in your stomach when you thought about how unlikely it was you would accomplish such a feat. You had to turn away as they shared a solitary dance, pressing their lips together, loving smiles on their faces. Your heart ached sharply in your chest, the beat something you could hear in your ears as you tried to breathe through the discomfort, desperately hoping not to attract attention from anyone who might be looking.

Your eyes darted up, sweeping quickly across the crowd, a soothing wave of relief dousing you in coolness when you didn’t find anyone staring back at you…

Until you saw them.

He was walking her from the infirmary, guiding her carefully across the slightly uneven terrain, one strong hand bracing her back and the other cupping her elbow. He didn’t even look up, choosing instead to watch her every little move, murmuring in remedial Spanish, as if he had known the language always. You were frozen in time, unable to comprehend exactly where it had all gone wrong, how he had so easily left you behind and swooped in, playing Price Charming to some damsel in distress. He’d risked his life, risked the life of his mother and sister, of Travis (and though you knew it wasn’t truly his fault the helicopter went down, you blamed him for it anyway); he’d risked your life. Running off as he did, knowing there wasn’t a chance in hell that Madison wouldn’t come looking for him. He’d left you to the dead, quite literally.

Watching him now press his chapped lips to her sweaty temple was the single most painful thing you had ever experienced.

It topped all the times he had gone missing back in L.A., it topped when he would show back up for a few nights, luring you into believing this time it was different, he was different; only to leave you high and dry a day later. It topped the moment you realized your life would never be the same again, and it even topped the moment he walked away from you, disappearing into a crowd of the dead.

And yet…you couldn’t seem to look away.

His easy smile made you sick, and her endlessly brown eyes peering up at him made you want to scratch them right out of her skull, with your own bare hands. You’d never been a violent person, you’d always wondered what possessed people to completely lose their shit, but now? Now you understood.

The bastard turned toward the table you were sitting at, aiming to bring his latest conquest amongst yourself and his family. Your eyes narrowed menacingly and you shot to your feet without thought, quickly disentangling your legs from underneath the picnic table, hissing out a breath in pain after slamming your knee against the tabletop. The sound did the exact opposite of what you had hoped, garnering attention from those at the table, and the two approaching it.

You could feel Nick’s gaze, boring into your body, urging you to meet his eyes, but you refused and quickly strode away from the scene you’d managed to create.

Ignoring Alicia’s sympathetic eyes and the worried call of your name from Madison, you continued to make your way across the part, knowing that you couldn’t make her pick. You’d grown up with Alicia, dated her son and stuck with him through the trials they had faced. You’d been with them from the beginning of this revolting situation you had all been burdened with, killing to live. You were practically her second daughter, in all but blood and name, so you refused to put her in that terrible place; both because the thought made you nauseous and because you were secretly afraid to know just whose side she would align herself with.

Crossing the grass to a long table that held an array of drinks, you spooned what you assumed was apple cider into a clean cup, refusing to acknowledge the way your hand trembled, unable to hold either the cup or the dipping spoon steady. Tears pricked the edges of your eyes as you spilt more than you managed to pour, and you were seriously debating disappearing back toward the cabin, when a deep voice murmured softly near your side.

“Here, let me.”

You gasped softly, nearly dropping both the spoon and cup, had it not been for the strong hands that were suddenly surrounding your own. They stilled under his touch, relaxing into the gentle but firm grip without your permission. Your chest rose and fell quickly with a surge of adrenaline and something else that you refused to name; you hadn’t even heard him come up! You’d been so wrapped up in your own mind; his powerful footfalls hadn’t even broken through to your consciousness.

Wetting your lips quickly, you swallowed through the sudden lump that hung in your throat as you lifted your eyes, sucking in a sharp breath when your gaze met his.

It burned.

His eyes burned into you but, unlike the way your ex-boyfriend’s had earlier, this heat didn’t make you want to run screaming to the opposite side of the ranch’s many acres. Instead, a blooming warmth flowed through your body, rushing along your bloodstream, igniting a spark and flutter within the pit of your stomach.

You could feel yourself instinctively lean toward him, the desire to just give up all the false strength and relax into his strong chest was overwhelming. The expanse was broad, showcased by the hunter green material that was pulled tautly across it, allowing you a peek at some of the definition that displayed his muscles. His shoulders were broader, developed and honed with many hours of work on the ranch, and military training. His legs were long, leaving him towering over your shorter stature, allowing you to feel small and safe in his presence. His jawline was sharp, dusted with a faint shadow of scruff, and his features seemed to be chiseled perfectly, no doubt by some renaissance artist. His eyes were a disarming blue color, you couldn’t name the exact hue because it seemed to change, easing or darkening with his moods and thoughts. His hair was thick and was both brown and blonde, almost like it had been touched by the sun.

You didn’t know much about Troy Otto, aside from the fact that he was both intense and, quite possibly, slightly dangerous.

You had to hand it to him; slightly questionable methods aside, you had to admire the drive and passion it took to do what he had done. His obvious want to understand just what exactly had gone wrong enough in the world that the dead had awoken propelled him forward, gave him purpose, and that was something you had recently called into question for yourself. In all honestly, between his appearance and his warlike adaptation to handling this new world, he reminded you of Ares in Greek Mythology.

You weren’t sure why, perhaps it was just because that book had been the last thing you read before it became impossible to return to your own home.

Troy waited as you looked him over, his lips curling upward in the beginnings of a smirk as he watched you, the expression only growing when your wide eyes finally met his. He squeezed your hands gently, reminding you both of your position, before you gave a jerky little nod, releasing the cup and ladle into his grip. He didn’t even bother to look away from you, leaving you trapped within his gaze as he poured the perfect amount of cider into your mug and offered it to you, a boyish grin upon his lips that left you nearly breathless.

He watched as you took your first sip, his clear blue eyes lingering upon your throat as you swallowed, provoking his own throat to constrict as he shifted in place slightly. Rolling his lip between his teeth, he waited until you lowered the ceramic cup to ask the question that had been festering within since he had watched you dart away from the table minutes before.

Running away wasn’t really a move that he had expected from you, but he could understand it. You had been so desperate back at the military base, pleading with him to let you and the Clark’s go, so that you could find your boyfriend.

Taking you into the building had been nearly impossible.

He had stayed to watch, his back pressed up against the jeep as he observed. You’d turned from seemingly weak and innocent to a complete hellcat; spitting, clawing, throwing both kicks and punches. You’d used your legs, bracing them against the threshold in an attempt to keep the guards from forcing you into the hallway. Alicia had been screaming for you, Madison ordering you to settle down and stop resisting, but you had refused. One of the guard’s had caught his eye after going down, eating pavement when you kicked his knee out from underneath him. Troy had quickly motioned, silently ordering for you to be placed in a room separate from the Clark women, his own intrigue over your disposition piqued as you screamed out for someone who wasn’t even there.

The fact that you had belonged to someone else mattered very little, he had already decided- you were his.

He knew you felt it too, it showed every time he drew near; the way your breath hitched, your pupils dilated, the way you watched him just as closely as he watched you, a barely leashed hunger lurking beneath the surface.

He just needed to get you to see it.

You needed to let him in.

Reaching out, his long fingers wrapped around the mug once more, plucking it from your hands. You turned to him slightly, eyebrows arched in both confusion and a silent question. Instead of answering, or even speaking, his hand found yours and he began tugging you toward the patch of grass that had been lit up with more fairy lights than any other, creating something of an ethereal dance floor.

Your eyes couldn’t have grown any wider if they tried. It almost made him burst out laughing.

“Troy!” You hissed, immediately digging in your heels, attempting to thwart his plans as soon as you caught on. “Stop! Stop it, Troy…Troy!”

He didn’t listen and, if you were honest, you didn’t put up as much of a fight as you could have.

Ducking your head as more and more eyes turned upon you, you quickened your steps behind him, crowding up against the broad expanse of his back, effectively using his body to shield your raging blush from the party goers who had turned, their own eyes wide as they watched the youngest Otto tow you to the handful of couples who swayed together. The music was a mixture of older and newer, each of them perfect for dancing together, each wrapped up in their own little worlds.

Whispers broke out as Troy laced his fingers with yours, using the new grip to swing you out to the side in an arc before pulling you back into his body, that same hand slotting with yours perfectly, while his other found its home in the small of your back, settling there snugly. The opening chords of a new song broke out through the speakers and, surrendering yourself to your (happy) predicament, you dipped your head down to pull a deep breath in through your nose, before lifting your head to peer up at the devious rancher once more.

In doing so, you caught a pair of dark eyes staring back at you.

And they were furious.

Quickly snapping your head in the opposite direction, you allowed yourself to be guided backward, nearly jumping out of your skin when Troy’s voice caressed your ears, the tone surprisingly quiet and soothing.

“You don’t owe him anything, you know.” You knew. “He’s the one that left you behind and shacked up with some other girl.” You knew that too.

Sighing softly, you glanced back up at him, before tearing your eyes away from his imploring gaze, letting your own drift out to take in the crowd as Troy spun you around once more.

A startling amount of people were peering back at you, their faces arranged in various degrees of shock, concern, and curiosity. His brother’s face, in particular, looked entirely too worried for such a simple thing as dancing; while his father’s look was one entirely different from those of the crowd, matching only Madison’s in its calculation and deliberation.

You deliberately avoided making contact with the ones that you could practically feel, like needles pricking at your side.

“I know,” You finally sighed, lifting your head to meet the blue eyes hovering above you, their depths layered with secrets untold. “Part of me just can’t believe it. Part of me thinks…thinks it can’t be real.”

Troy frowned slightly, a fire of jealousy making him tighten his grip on you ever so slightly.

“But it is, Y/N. He almost shot me for her. He didn’t even ask if you were okay.”

You hissed in a breath, ripping your hand out of his so that you could smack his chest roughly. You didn’t even bother to fight it when his fingers closed back over yours, this time holding your hand hostage against his chest where you had hit him.

It stung, his words.

Because he was right.

You had been in that same helicopter that fell out of the damn sky, silently seething. You’d nearly ended up with a hole in your stomach, had Jake not pushed you down, and had to watch as Travis threw himself from the open door. You’d survived the crash, only to witness the pilot become the dead’s dinner, and then you’d had to trek across grass and hills, finally arriving safely at Broke Jaw Ranch. Only to have Madison blow right past you to wrap Alicia up in her arms, and search for Travis to bring up the rear.

And Nick? Well, he hadn’t bothered to look your way once, much less ask if you were alright.

Everything suddenly felt so heavy, as if the entire world sat upon your shoulders, weighing you down with both feelings and responsibilities that you didn’t want.

Your head dropped forward, pressing into the planes of his chest, and you felt as Troy hauled you that much closer. His big hand left yours where it held your hand above his heart, instead threading its way through the loose locks that hung down your back in gentle waves, thanks to braiding it most of the day.

You shuddered when his lips pressed to your forehead, surprisingly soft and smooth, shifting and quirking as he spoke against your skin, his voice rumbling through the bottom of his chest and into your ear.

“I would never, ever leave you behind, doll.” He vowed, still guiding both of your bodies through the steps. “You belong here, on the ranch,” Troy paused for only a moment, dipping his head to brush his lips against your ear as he uttered the last of his sentence. “You belong with me.”

Slowly, you lifted your head from his chest, only just catching the small flash of vulnerability hidden within his gaze, before it flickered away.

He tensed as you continued to remain silent, choosing instead to let your eyes map out his features once more, his words reverberating within your hectic mind. His grip tightened with each passing minute, the only outward sign that he was uncomfortable.

Carefully, you lifted your hand, fingers lightly sweeping over the bruised skin of his eye, your lips pressing into a thin line when you remembered the way he screamed, the pain he must have been in as Madison drove the spoon ever deeper into the socket.

You hadn’t approved.

Part of you could understand her motives, but the rest of you was disgusted;  though, for some inexplicable reason, you couldn’t say you wouldn’t do the same if it had been you trying to get to him.

Your breath hitched as that thought took hold, acknowledging you would go to such extreme lengths, despite the fact that you hardly knew the man.

There was just something there, a connection of sorts, something that ran deep within the marrow of your bones.

When his lips covered yours, it wasn’t a surprise.

Still, your stomach flipped over and your heart might have skipped a beat, while your head fell back upon your shoulders and your eyes fluttered closed. His lips were softer than you expected and slightly moistened by the drag of his tongue before he had sealed them over your own. They pressed together and pulled at yours with a passion that you hadn’t expected, sending bolts of electricity rippling down your spine, and heat pooling in your stomach. Your fingers curled tightly around his biceps, desperately latching on for some sort of anchor in the whirlwind that his kiss provided, taking you by storm. Your breath came in quick little pants as he broke away and then dipped forward again, and at some point those same hands and long fingers had taken hold of your waist, lifting your off of your toes when you could stand on them no longer. He seemed to hesitate when it came to deepening the kiss and, growing impatient, you scraped your teeth sharply over his bottom lip, tugging it as you pulled back from him.

The growl that vibrated through his chest left you breathless and embarrassingly damp, though your current position left you unable to clench your thighs together as you might have liked, while a devious smirk lit upon your face.

You knew Troy was right. You belonged with him.

(Gif taken from Google!)

[ftwd-nicky]

Hospital Visits

Pairing: Nick Clark x Reader

Author: @ftwd-nicky

Words: 2378

Author’s Note: So, I was re-watching the first season and seeing Nick in the hospital had sparked ideas to write a fic on it! I really hope you guys enjoy this. It’s kinda pre-apocalypse (obviously lol), but yeah! It’s cute! Thanks to my babe @lovelydob for proofreading this for me!!

I had known the Clark family for almost all my life. My mom would always bring me to play with Alicia and Nick when we were younger. My mom always told me that Nick and I got along a lot easier than Alicia for some reason, but later on in the years she became my best friend as well.

Madison, Nick and Alicia’s mother, and my mom had always thought that Nick and I would end up together someday. I thought this to be strange since Nick has never really took an interest in me.

I was there for them through everything, especially when their dad had left. I was their shoulder to cry on. Nick seemed to be a little more effective by it than Alicia, so some nights he would call me to go over just so he can nuzzle his face into my neck and cry. Although I’d always be there for them, but I’d find it struggling since I didn’t know what to actually say to them that’d make them feel better.

Nick always seemed to be there for me in the time of need. I remember one day I had walked home from school when some bullies had stopped me near an alleyway…

Alicia and I stayed after school for a science project we were working on together. After we had manage to work on it a bit after gossiping for about half an hour she told me that Matt, her boyfriend, had texted her to come over.

“You sure you can walk home on your own? I can call Nick if you want.” Alicia asked me as we walked out of the school.

I looked towards her, giving her a small smile as I shook my head. “No, I should be fine. If anything I can call him. I have his number.” I chuckled, blushing slightly at the mention of his name.

“You know, sometimes I can’t believe you like my brother. You do know he’s been doing drugs lately, right?” She asked me and I frowned, nodding my head slowly.

“Yeah, but it doesn’t make him a bad person. He’s still the same Nick I always knew.” I muttered, glancing at the sidewalk.

“That’s true, but please, call him if you feel uncomfortable about anything, okay?” Alicia reminded me and I nodded my head, waving goodbye to her as we went our separate ways.

I took a hold of both straps of my backpack, walking the same route I always take when I walk home from school. Once I reached the only alley on the walk home, two drunk guys stumble out of it, noticing me as I tried to quickly walk past them.

“Hey girlie. C’mere darlin’.” The shorter one slurred, reaching their hand out towards me as I dodge it, backing into a light post.

“Oh come on. We don’t bite… hard.” The taller smirked, stepping closer to me. I tried to get past the guy, but he stopped me, pushing me towards his friend.

“Please… just let me go.” I muttered, the shorter guy catching me in his arms, lifting me off the ground. “Wait! Wait! Let me go!” I screamed, trying to free my arms, reaching for my phone.

“Why don’t you just shut your pretty mouth.” The taller one growled as his friend threw me to the ground, hitting the back of my head against the brick wall. I wince, lifting my hand to feel the wound, my fingertips covered in blood.

“Why don’t you guys pick on someone who’s preferably your age and not a teenager.” A familiar voice rang out from behind them. The two drunks turned around and I saw Nick standing behind him, a hard glare in his eyes as his arms were crossed.

“And what are you gonna do about it, huh?” One of them muttered angrily as Nick just chuckled, shaking his head. Nick didn’t give any warning as he punched the shorter one in the nose, knocking him to the ground. He held his nose as it bled, the taller guy getting angrier as he wound up to punch Nick. I looked around for something to hit him with when I find a brink a couple feet away from me and I grab it, hitting the taller guy in the back of the head, knocking him out.

I breathed heavily as the brick fell from my shaking hand, looking up at Nick. His eyes were wide as he stared down at me before bringing me into a hug. “Are you okay?” He asked, his hand resting on the back of my head and I winced, pulling away from him.

“Well, other than the fact that the back of my head is bleeding and I’m literally shaking from fear, yeah, I’m great.” I chuckled lightly, grabbing onto Nick’s arm as I feel a little lightheaded.

“C’mon, let’s get you fixed up.” He muttered, crouching a bit as he lifted me up bridal style, taking me by surprise. I let out a small gasp, wrapping my arms around Nick’s neck as he began to carry me to his house.

“You, uh, you didn’t have to carry me.” I whispered, my cheeks heating up as I’m sure I was red as a tomato.

“Well, I’m pretty sure you can’t walk that well due to blood loss, so deal with it.” Nick grinned, giving me a cheeky wink as I giggled, shaking my head.

I smiled to myself as the memory played in my head like a movie, realizing that I’m probably more into Nick than I actually know about. I was doodling on my notebook, wishing Nick could be here now, but no one’s seen him the last month. Alicia told me he was doing drugs again after we had tried so hard to help him get clean.

I frowned, drawing a frowny face on my notebook, a tear slipping from my eyes. “You really don’t know how much you miss someone until they’re really gone.” I whispered to myself, sniffling slightly as a knock was gently placed on my door.

I looked up as my mom walked in, a small smile on her lips as she walked towards me. “You okay?” She asked, noticing the tear stains on my face and I shook my head.

“N-No. I just want Nick to be okay.” I cried, standing up, wrapping my arms around her waist, softly crying into her shoulder. Her hand rubbed my back, cooing me softly as I calmed down a little bit.

“Well, I’ve got some good news and bad news.” She mentioned and I backed away from her, eyes widened.

“They found him?” I asked, my heart beating against my rib cage as she nodded her head. I sighed out of relief, rubbing my hands on my face. “Wait, what’s the bad news?” I asked, my face paling a bit as she grabbed my hands. Please tell me he’s not dead…

“He’s in the hospital. He was hit by a car this morning.” She mentioned and I gasped, placing my hand cover my mouth. “But he’s okay. Do you want to go see him?” She asked and I nodded my head excitingly like a kid on Christmas.

I grabbed my shoes, slipping them on quickly as the two of us walked out of the house, getting into the car. We drive towards the hospital in little silence, the soft radio playing in the background as my foot kept tapping against the floor, getting more anxious. My hand was on the handle of the car door, waiting for my mom to unlock it as she parked the car in the parking lot. As soon as she turned the vehicle off, I hopped out of it quickly, making my way towards the entrance of the hospital.

I walked up to the reception desk, rubbing my hands together softly as I waited for her to get off the phone. I felt my mom touch my shoulder and I glanced back at her, giving her a small smile as I heard the woman hang up the phone.

“Hi, um, what room is Nick Clark in?” I asked, leaning against the desk as she got up out of it, leading us towards his room which wasn’t that far from where she was sitting. I could feel my hands shaking as she pointed towards a large door with a window in the middle of it and my mom had thanked her as I gazed through the window, seeing Nick sitting in the hospital bed, restrained.

“Hey, you okay?” Mom asked me and I nodded my head a bit, opening the door to the room, walking inside. I noticed Travis sitting near him, reading the paper and he looked up once my mom closed the door behind her.

“Y/N, hey.” Travis greeted, getting up as he walked over to me, bringing me into a tight hug. My eyes stayed on Nick as I hugged Travis, pulling away from him after a few seconds before walking over to the hospital bed.

“Is he okay?” I asked quietly, not wanting to wake him as my fingers brushed his hand, rubbing my thumb against the back of his hand.

“Yeah, he’s going to be fine.” Travis reassured, rubbing my shoulder lightly before taking my mom’s arm, leaving me and Nick alone. I sat down on the bed next to his leg, taking his hand in mine as he stirred a bit, his eyes fluttering open.

Nick’s eyes met mine, a small grin on his lips as he squeezed my hand and I gave him a small smile, trying my hardest not to cry. “Hi.” His voice croaked, his cold fingers intertwining with mine.

“Are you nuts?” I asked, glancing up at him as his eyebrows furrowed together, shifting in his bed a bit. I sighed, leaning forward, pressing the button on the side of the bed to make him sit up.

Nick quietly thanked me, analyzing my face as it remained blank. “To answer your question… I’m not nuts.” He muttered, leaning his head back a bit.

“Well, I certainly think you are. Y-You could’ve gotten seriously injured, Nick.” I muttered, pulling my hands out of his. I stood up, pacing in front of his bed as I felt his eyes on me. “A-And it’s like you don’t even care! How could you just be so calm about this?”

“Look, Y/N, it’s not like I enjoyed getting hit by a car.” He started and I cut him off.

“Then why the fuck were you just running down the street?” I yelled, flailing my arms. “God, Nick, do you realize that the people who love you are worried about you?” I asked, tears trailing down my cheeks.

Nick’s face fell as the tears didn’t stop and I run a hand through my hair, feeling my hands shake. I stumbled, grabbing onto the end of the hospital bed. Nick sat up straight, his eyes widening as I slowly fell to the floor, breathing a little heavy.

“Y/N?” Nick called out, hearing the panic in his voice.

“I’m fine…” I whispered, taking a few deep breaths before getting back up slowly. “But Nick, I-I can’t lose you.” I frowned, sitting back in my original spot next to him.

“I’m not going anywhere. I’m getting clean after this.” He told me and I glanced towards him, wondering if he was serious.

“Are you really?” I asked and he nodded his head, giving me a small smile.

“I’m dead serious. I saw some crazy shit that I never want to experience again and I hate that I put you through all this worry.” Nick muttered and I smiled softly.

“I’m not the only one who worries…” I trailed off and Nick grinned, reaching for my hands.

“Yeah, but you’re the one that matters most.” He whispered, softly playing with my fingers as I scooted a bit closer to him.

I blushed a bit, smiling as one of his hands gently touched my face, rubbing my cheekbone. “Nick,” I started but had cut me off by leaning forward, pressing our lips together. I let out a small gasp, my eyes widening as his eyes were shut and I closed my eyes slowly, resting my hands against his cheeks.

We heard the door open and we pulled away from each other, looking behind me to see my mom and Travis standing at the door. I cleared my throat, getting off the bed as my mom had an evident smirk on her face.

“We’re going to head home. We’ll let you say goodbye.” She gave me a wink before leading Travis back out of the room.

I groaned a bit, hiding my face in my hands as I heard Nick chuckle, looking towards him. “Shut up.” I laughed, walking back over to him. “Well, it seems like we’re leaving.” I bit my lip, playing with the tips of my fingers as he grinned up at me.

“You’ll come back tomorrow right?” He asked and I tilted my head, giving him a “are you kidding me” look.

“Of course I am.” I chuckled, pushing some of his hair out of his face. Nick grabbed my hand, pressing a small kiss to it before intertwining our fingers again.

“One last kiss?” He asked and my cheeks flushed, glancing back to see my mom and Travis at a reasonable distance where they’re not eavesdropping.

“You can’t wait until tomorrow?” I asked and he shook his head, biting his lip for a minute. I gave in, leaning down pressing my lips to his quickly. He groaned when I pulled away, his hand landing on the back of my head, pulling my back closer to him, kissing me again.

I grinned in the kiss, moving my lips against his as his fingers ran through my hair, sighing softly into the kiss. I pulled away from him, resting my forehead against his as I felt the butterflies in my stomach. “I gotta go.” I whispered.

“Alright, alright. I’ll see you tomorrow, cutie.” Nick smiled and I stood up, walking out of the room, looking into the window, waving at him before leaving the hospital with my mom, grinning like an idiot.

[auburnfamilynews]

https://twitter.com/GaQMcK1/status/1261105277983690755/photo/1

Breaking down the most important targets left on the board.

The Tigers started June with a ton of momentum and are looking to keep it going over the summer months. Today, I am going to offer my take on what remaining top targets are the most important left on Auburn’s board. By “most important” I took a few things into consideration. First, whether or not that player can have an immediate impact at a crucial position of need. Second, what winning that race would mean in the larger perception of Auburn’s recruiting class. Finally, how likely that prospect is to actually pick Auburn. Here’s my breakdown of who would mean the most to Auburn if they were to sign with the Tigers in 2021.

1.) 5-star CB GaQuincy McKinstry | 5’11” | 172 lbs | Pinson, AL

Auburn has never signed a five star defensive back in the modern recruiting era. They have not signed the top player in the state of Alabama since Nick Saban’s arrival in Tuscaloosa. They could end both of those droughts this cycle if Auburn can reel in the nation’s 2nd ranked cornerback Ga’Quincy “Kool-Aid” McKinstry.

There’s a lot of reasons to be hopeful in this race. McKinstry wants to play both football and basketball in college which Auburn is selling hard. Auburn has been after McKinstry longer than most other top programs plus he’s close with his former high school teammate, now Auburn’s starting quarterback Bo Nix. But it’s hard to be optimistic given the history of elite cornerbacks in the state of Alabama rarely choosing the Tigers over the Tide. LSU also lurks as a legitimate threat in this race and Clemson can never be discounted. I expect a commitment to come by the end of July though he’s yet to publicly set a date.

2.) 4-star BUCK Jeremiah Williams | 6’3” | 224 lbs | Birmingham, AL

The Tigers need pass rushers. You would be hard pressed to find a better one in this class than Jeremiah Williams. A childhood fan of the Tigers, Williams has emerged as Auburn’s #1 Buck target in the 2021 class. Alabama, Florida and Oklahoma are also hard after the Ramsay standout with the Tide likely being the Tigers top competitor. But Williams is reportedly very close with Auburn head coach Gus Malzahn and there seems to be some confidence on the Tigers’ side that they are the team to beat in this race. Like McKinstry, I would not be surprised to see him commit by the end of next month even though he’s stated he plans to wait until December. Another important note, Williams and McKinstry are good friends and would like to play with each other at the next level. If the Tigers could get Williams on board it might help them land McKinstry.

3.) 5-star LB Smael Mondon | 6’3” | 220 lbs | Dallas, GA

Auburn’s linebacker corps returns in tact in 2020 and the Tigers just signed a loaded three man class last recruiting cycle. So in 2021, Auburn is swinging for the fences and looking to land one, at max two, elite linebacker signees. Mondon appears to be the top target.

Mondon is reportedly extremely close with Auburn linebackers coach Travis Williams and that relationship is what has the Tigers likely sitting at #2 in this race. But the Dawgs are always hard to beat for elite talent and there’s a ton of confidence he will soon be joining their 2021 class. The longer this plays out the better for Auburn in my opinion. Mondon has hinted that a commit could come this month.

4.) 4-star WR Christian Leary | 5’9” | 180 lbs | Orlando, FL

This has been a fascinating recruitment that will likely remain so until signing day. Leary is one of the most coveted wideouts in this class and arguably the fastest. Auburn offered the nation’s 130rd ranked prospect before his other two finalists Alabama and Florida. As I wrote during my preview series, Auburn actually felt like they might be the team to beat at the time. But Alabama and Oklahoma came on strong during the spring. The Sooners thought he would soon join their class before the Tide seemed to have surged ahead. Leary had a commit date set for June 6th. If he had kept to that date the pick likely would have been Alabama.

But things change. Auburn continued to stay after Leary and have built strong relationships with the explosive playmaker. Dematrius Davis’s commitment and subsequent recruitment efforts to get Leary to join Auburn has had a major impact. Leary is also sold on Chad Morris being able to get the most out of his talent. The Tigers now appear to be the team to beat once again and a decision could come soon. My hunch is this is the 2nd commit Davis was hinting at on Twitter last week but we will see. There’s already been a lot of movement in this race so I wouldn’t count this as a lock by any means. Even if the Tigers can land Leary this month they will have to fight hard to keep teams like Alabama and Florida at bay come signing day.

5.) 4-Star CB Nyland Green | 6’2” | 183 lbs | Covington, GA

As I mentioned during my preview series, I believe Green is the #1 cornerback in this class. That’s no shot at McKinstry who is a stud but I think Green has everything you want in a lockdown corner in the SEC. I also didn’t think Auburn had much of a shot just a few months ago but it appears things have changed in a good way for the Tigers.

Clemson has been viewed as the team to beat and might still be but per AuburnUndercover’s Keith Niebuhr, Auburn has made a serious push in this race. Green is close with former high school teammate and recent Auburn signee Deandre Butler. He’s also been to the Plains numerous times and is being sold on Auburn’s recent success putting corners in the league. Landing either Green or McKinstry likely means Auburn ends their five star cornerback drought. It’s also not out of the realm of possibility they snag both. That would be a historic haul if Auburn could pull it off. Still a long ways to go though in both of those races.

6.) 5-Star OT Tommy Brockermeyer / 5-Star OT Amarius Mims / 4-star OT Savion Byrd

I would have put Dylan Fairchild on this and probably in the #2 or #3 spot before his commitment to the Dawgs. I saw him as the most likely elite offensive tackle prospect left on Auburn’s board to sign with the Tigers. But with Fairchild committed to UGA, Auburn’s focus will likely now be on this trio of elite tackles.

Auburn appears to be running #3 for Brockermeyer behind Alabama and Texas. I personally think it’s a distant third but at least they are still in the race. The Tigers have shown the ability to make up ground in a hurry this offseason despite the visiting restrictions so maybe Chad Morris and Jack Bicknell can work their magic here. The bonus with signing Tommy is Auburn would likely also snag his twin brother and the nation’s #1 center prospect James Brockermeyer. Those two plus Auburn’s four current OL commits would be a heck of a job by Auburn’s new offensive line coach.

I continue to be skeptical that Auburn is a legit contender for Amarius Mims. Personally, I view the nation’s #2 ranked offensive tackle as an UGA commit despite his public statements that Alabama is the team to beat. Still, Mims has been to Auburn multiple times this spring and there’s some confidence on the Plains they are a legit contender. Mims wants to wait to make a decision which is good news for the Tigers. Maybe a strong performance on the field paired with a home run official visit could swing this thing to the good guys.

Finally, Savion Byrd is the wildcard on Auburn’s recruiting board. The Texas native is viewed as a virtual lock to SMU due in large part to his former high school coach being on the Mustangs staff. But I doubt he ends up signing with SMU in the end. LSU and Texas are believed to be the biggest threats to SMU but don’t count out Auburn. Byrd was at Auburn’s 2019 season opener vs Oregon and visited campus this spring. He reportedly recently had a virtual visit with the Tigers that went well. The Tigers shocked a lot of folks signing his former teammate Chris Thompson Jr last cycle. Can they do it again with Byrd?

7.) 4-Star S Kamren Kinchens | 5’11” | 190 lbs | Miami, FL

I am a big fan of Kamren Kinchens. The Miami native has quickly risen to the top of Auburn’s safety board. Wesley McGriff has made him a priority and he’s good friends with Auburn commit Phillip O’Brien Jr. A commitment is coming on July 11th and I like where Auburn sits. Don’t count out the hometown Canes though in this race. There’s confidence in Coral Gables they will keep Kinchens home. Auburn has had some success in recent cycles beating Miami on the trail, let’s hope that continues in July.

8.) 4-Star DT Marquis Robinson | 6’3” | 300 lbs | Milton, FL

Rodney Garner never stops looking for talent. After signing an absolutely loaded class in 2020, Coach G is looking to keep the cupboard well stocked up front in 2021. He already has a pledge from one of the nation’s best defensive tackle prospects in Lee Hunter. He could soon be adding another in Marquis Robinson.

Auburn was one of the first teams to offer Robinson and make him a priority. Florida State has emerged as the Tigers top competitor and are working hard to keep him in state. But as of today, Auburn looks tough to beat in this race. I wouldn’t be shocked if a commitment came by the end of July though Robinson has yet to set a public date. He fits the mold of a Dontavius Russell or Tyrone Truesdell in my opinion. A big, powerful, athletic interior force that could free up guys like Hunter to make some big plays.

9.) 4-Star WR Shadrach Banks | 6’0” | 210 lbs | Houston, TX

As of today, Banks appears to be firmly committed to Texas A&M. He grew up an Aggie fan and committed to Jimbo almost a year ago. But now two of his teammates, Dematrius Davis and Jaeden Roberts, are committed to the Tigers. They will undoubtedly be in his ear all year trying to get him to flip to the good guys. I think Auburn is going to have to show this fall that their passing game has taken a major step forward. If that happens, I think Auburn has a great shot at flipping the nation’s 14th ranked wideout.

10.) 4-Star DE Dylan Brooks | 6’5” | 240 lbs | Roanoke, AL

Finally, I don’t think the race to land Dylan Brooks’s pledge is over. He surprised many committing to Tennessee earlier this year and seems locked in right now. But this is a kid that was on Auburn’s campus for almost every home game the past two seasons and who comes from an Auburn family. If the Tigers can get him back for an official visit this fall, I don’t think it’s out of the realm of possibility they could pull off the flip.

War Eagle!

from College and Magnolia - All Posts https://www.collegeandmagnolia.com/2020/6/11/21280433/2021-auburn-football-recruiting-10-most-important-remaining-targets

[colp76-blog]

Air Date: 5th March 2018

Director: Peter Horton

Writers: Travis Beachman, Philip K. Dick

Story.

  Emily Juno Temple is travelling to work and all seems good in the world as she admires an AUTOFAC billboard by the side of the road. Well, until the radio announces a rise in hostility between America and Russia and that missile above heading straight into the city skyline.

After the war, the land was decimated.

All lay in waste. Except the great factories that kept working, churning out goods for the slaughtered consumers.

Emily now finds herself as part of a group of survivors living in a savaged wasteland as they head out for a mission. The mission consists of shooting down a delivery drone from the AUTOFAC, but why? Emily’s plan is to hack into the server from the drone in order to make contact with the factory and her only way in is through Customer Support, I’m pizzled! AUTOFAC respond and will send a representative out to them in order to help them resolve their issue.

The group hold a meeting to discuss their plan about trying to persuade the factory to shut itself down. Other members of the group strongly disagree and want them to get rid of the server, so that they can simply survive. Conrad Morrison David Lyons says that “man made the AUTOFAC and man must unmake it.” besides, the factory is poisoning and polluting the environment around them, their Eden will be dead soon anyway. Emily meets up with her boyfriend Avishai Nick Eversman who has a great collection of books that will help rebuild the world, eventually. Emily has been collecting items herself from a world that once was, including a copy of Wired Magazine. Avishai tells Emily that he loves her and she fails to respond, well that went well. Anyway, the Complaints Department has arrived.

Conrad explains to help bot Alice Janelle Monáe that the factory deliveries are redundant and that it must close down. Alice responds by saying that AUTOFAC will not terminate and the factory exists to serve the humans. Emily is left with no choice but to shut down Alice, access her server and try to reprogram her. Another flashback, Emily now has a razor-blade and is cutting into her own skull.

Alice seems more human now and explains that she knows the group have been hacking drones and that AUTOFAC will come looking for her. Emily is unable to reprogram Alice because her matrix is far more complicated than she thought. Instead, she threatens her with a complete mind-wipe unless she gets her and her friends into the factory. Judging by the fear in Alice’s face, they are in. The original plan to shut down the factory isn’t going to work anymore but the group have something else in mind instead. Time to blow the place up with some Nuclear Warheads.

  Alice leads the group inside the factory and each member will plant their bomb and meet topside before detonation. Sounds simple enough but Conrad and another member are followed and killed.

Emily is still with Alice as they enter a chamber filled with bots. Unfortunately, after smashing one of the capsules, one of them looks just like Emily. Emily says the AUTOFAC is trying to replace the humans, Alice replies that she is wrong, they already have. Emily finds herself lying on an examination table with cables running from her own matrix and into the factory system. Alice explains that the humans were all killed after the war and the factory had to create new consumers, which most are doing, apart from their little group.

  Not to worry though as her friends will be destroyed soon. Alice has spoken too soon as something starts to go wrong with the system. Turns out Emily knew she was a bot all along, she managed to look through the filters of her skull and hid a virus in her own program.

As the factory computer begins to malfunction, Emily says she has been dreaming about someone else’s memories and asks Alice who was she modelled after? Another flashback and Emily is reading the Wired Magazine she has been saving all those years and on the front cover is Emily Zabriskie. Alice says she was modelled on a brilliant woman who created the AUTOFAC and Emily replies, “and now she has unmade it” Emily looks up as the factory turns to darkness.

Emily returns home to find it has survived, along with her boyfriend who is waiting for her.

Production and design.

The attention to detail in this episode was amazing and some scenes are pretty special. I did notice a few visual Easter eggs in there. The scene when Alice arrives at the camp is very reminiscent of The Day the Earth Stood Still and the scene when she takes the group to the factory is most definitely taken from Blade Runner.

I thought the killer robot inside the factory was superbly designed and I was left wanting to see more of him/her. It reminded me of the Predator but more terrifying.

The flashback scenes worked pretty well and showing the inside of the Wired Magazine at the end was a great idea. Basically, everything involving the AUTOFAC looked perfect. Something that didn’t really impress me though was the group camp! I fully understand that there is only some much you can do with a budget but I thought it looked way too pretty. In my imagination, it would have looked far more brutal and a lot darker. Some views in England already look like the back of a fridge and this camp would be an ideal escape from all of that. It just felt a bit Dawson’s Creek to me and pretty clean to be fair. I shouldn’t moan really but it really took me out of the story sometimes. apart from that tiny little gripe, I thought this episode looked amazing.

Conclusion.

I have Autofac by Philip K. Dick on my Kindle funnily enough, but I have decided that I am only going to read these stories once I have finished reviewing this series. Only because I want to enjoy them on their own without comparing them. When I first started the series, I didn’t think about the changes that would be made to the original material but I’m guessing it could be quite a lot. This technology is already being tested now and could be around very soon, is it a good thing or a bad thing? I’m not sure but it’s happening anyway.

After watching these episodes, I’m often left wondering what is Philip K. Dick trying to tell me? Well, to be honest, I am a little confused by this one. Is it that some tragedies are created on purpose and some with the best intentions, by accident? Is it that life will find a way once we all perish? Or is it just a simple story about living your best life. I guess there are a lot of things to take away from it, but I guess that what attracts me to Philip K. Dick, he leaves me wondering about the story; for a very long time after it has finished.

So what are your thoughts on Autofac? What did it mean to you? I would love to hear your views about this episode. Thanks for reading and I will be back soon.

  Philip K. Dick’s Electric Dreams: Episode 7 Autofac – Deliver us from Evil. Air Date: 5th March 2018 Director: Peter Horton Writers: Travis Beachman, Philip K. Dick Story. Emily…

[favvnsongs]

i know you're feeling a bit poorly and i wish there was more i could do!! love you~

It’s almost impulsive, the way he asks.

It’s… nighttime. The hour doesn’t seem to matter as much anymore–Alicia had a watch for a while but Chris hasn’t seen it in days. They get up when the sun is bright enough and stop when they can’t see the road in front of them anymore. Sometimes when the moon is bright enough they go a little farther.

But it’s nighttime, and they’re eating cold beans out of a can that Alicia bashed in with a rock. They sit back to back and pass the can after every other bite, scooping with dirty fingers and spitting out the shards of the lid that chipped into the sauce. Travis and Madison went to find water, or maybe fuck, or maybe just die in the dirt like everyone else they’ve ever known.

“Let’s go,” he says, absently.

Alicia goes to hand him the almost empty can. “You gotta pee?”

“No. I mean.” He scrambles to his feet, dropping the can to the side without another thought. “Let’s… let’s go.”

Alicia points in a mostly random direction. “But–”

“They don’t care about us.”

Alicia’s face goes flat. She throws the last water bottle at him. “Go fuck yourself.” She lies down, curled into a little ball. There’s no fire tonight and he can see her shivering. Chris hesitates, looking out at the horizon.

“They don’t care about us,” he repeats, but he lies down and scoots until their backs touch.

She wakes him in the morning. There’s fresh water in dirty plastic bottles and he drains half of one before passing it back to her. “Food?”

She shrugs.

They spend the day sitting on crumbling concrete, watching the birds. In the distance of the scrubby desert two figures stagger, dragging steps. Alicia twirls her knife but they disappear into the horizon.

Chris goes through his pack and finds vienna sausages, cold and slimy and dripping weird smelling water. He thinks about starting a fire but it’s too much work.

Alicia shakes her head when he offers her the can. He eats them, one at a time, methodical and mechanical until they’re all gone. Then he walks a hundred yards away and throws up into the shoulder of the freeway.

Alicia hands him a water bottle when he returns. “Let’s go,” she says, abrupt, looking off down the road with her hand to shadow the glare of the sun away. “Let’s just… let’s go.”

“Okay,” he says. They leave half the food and water behind and carve a note into the dirt with a stick.

They follow the highway. Sleep tucked up against the concrete dividers and take turns being the big spoon. It’s scorching during the day and freezing at night, and Chris doesn’t notice they smell like sweat anymore.

“Do you think they care?” Alicia asks him, snuffling into his shoulder and her arm slung around his waist. “Do you think they’re following us?”

Chris shrugs. His neck itches where his hair tangles against it, far too long, and she gently smoothes it out of the way. When she sleeps her breath ruffles against his temple, tickles across his cheek.

They find gum at a rest stop and split it one stick at a time, which helps him count six days before they run out. They eat a hostess cupcake in front of a fire and Alicia declares it their anniversary. It’s his turn to be the big spoon but she shakes her head and slips behind him. Murmurs his name and kisses the back of his neck and slides her cold hands into his boxers from behind.

He bites his lip and his chest heaves and he whispers ‘oh’ just before his toes curl. She wipes her hands in the crabgrass and bites his shoulder while he dozes. In the morning she frames the bruise with her fingers and looks darkly pleased; every time they eat she suckles it again, until it’s tender aching and faintly bleeding. Every night before he’s allowed to come she presses at it until he yelps and shudders, helpless in her hands.

++

It’s almost impulsive, the way he asks.

Nick makes him eat, pressing cans into his hands and staring at him. After it happened Chris refused for days, until Nick tackled him down and sat on his hips and pushed bites of beans into his mouth while Chris tried to bite him. “We had a dog once,” Nick says, his hand dusty and painfully tight over Chris’s mouth. “Do I have to rub your throat to make you swallow?”

Chris didn’t speak to him for five days. When he breaks it’s silence his throat feels like Nick’s hand, rough and dry and oddly callused. “Let’s go back?”

Nick is packing up the water, pretending he can’t hear.

Chris says it again, louder. Firmer. “We have to go back.”

Nick exhales. “Chris,” he tries, almost gentle.

Chris sits down in the middle of what used to be the road. He puts his head between his knees and his hands over his ears. “We have to go back, we have to go back, we have to go back we have to go back–”

  “–go back,” he’s whispering, his throat dry and cracked and hoarse. “We have to–”

Nick drops him into the dirt with an angry noise, panting from the effort of carrying him. “Fine! Fuck!” He turns, kicking a rock. “Fine!”

  It takes a week to get back. Nick talks constantly. It’ll be too hard to find, he says. There’s no more water left that way, he says. And at night, when Chris is asleep, please don’t make me do this, he says.

  “This is it,” Chris says. The pile of rocks is undisturbed–they’d dug for a full day, haunted by the thoughts of coyotes digging her up. Wrapped their palms in strips of her shirt and used rocks but their hands are still tender a full two weeks later.

Nick stares at where he buried his sister. He remembers when she came home from the hospital. The squint of her eyes and the soft tiny wisp of hair on her head. His first memory, touching a finger to her pudgy cheek and the wonder of how much love he could hold in his chest. “This is it.”

  They burn her on the third day, in the moonlight. It’s harder than Chris thought it would be. The cheap ugly pile, the best pyre they could make from scrub brush and twigs, keeps going out. The smoke is heavy and oily and they take turns throwing up. She doesn’t burn all the way through and Chris wants to stay and try harder, but it’s been hours and hours, the day turned to night again, and Nick is touching his shoulder. Their clothes smell like the fire, and her, and smoke, and death and blood.

“Please,” Nick says, and his voice cracks. “Chris, please. Please let’s go.”

They walk for another two days before they stop again. It’s a rest stop and they scrub at themselves in the bathroom, where the plumbing still works. Nick bends him over the sink and scrubs at his back, making him shiver and prickling goosebumps up his spine. Nick kicks his legs farther apart and Chris shivers again for a different reason, head bowed obediently, but Nick washes the back of his neck roughly and tells him to get dressed again. Chris stays bent over and Nick slams the door on the way out.

Chris goes to his knees before Nick on a picnic bench. Breath coming fast, uncertain hesitant eyes. Nick cradles his jaw, slips his hand through Chris’s hair and scritches gently at his scalp. Hooks a clean thumb in Chris’s mouth and tugs it open. Chris’s fingers shake when he undoes Nick’s zip. Nick smiles, gentling. “Do I have to rub your throat to get you to swallow?” he asks, and Chris holds his hands behind his back while Nick guides his head forward and eases inch by inch into Chris’s throat, until black spots dance in Chris’s vision and his drool drips down into the dust.

++

Chris opens his mouth to ask and Alicia kisses him. Nick rolls his eyes and throws a handful of beans at them, making Alicia shriek when they land in her hair. Nick shoulders his pack and pinches Alicia’s hip when she pouts Chris into carrying hers for her. “Don’t be prissy, Licia.”

She makes doe eyes at Nick and he sighs. Carries all three packs and Alicia hops on Chris’s back for a piggyback ride. “Tonight,” she whispers in his ear. “You think?”

Chris blinks. “Tonight what?”

“Ssh,” she says, impatient and exasperated and flicking his ear. “Don’t spill our plan.”

“It’s not our plan if I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Nick turns around from where he’s a bit ahead of them. “Stop conspiring.”

“It’s not a conspiracy,” Chris protests, while Alicia giggles into the back of Chris’s neck. “I don’t know what she’s talking about either.”

  Alicia wakes him while Nick is taking a piss. “It’s time.”

Chris rubs at his eyes. “That’s ominous.”

She straddles him and he forgets his entire vocabulary abruptly. Takes his hand and guides it up over her shirt and he marvels at how soft she still is, warm and faintly curved and rocking her hips when his thumb brushes over her nipple. “Do you want to touch me?”

Chris licks at his dry mouth. “I–I was going to ask–”

“Ask to touch me?”

“No to–to, uh–”

Nick sighs at them, returning. “Over the shirt, Christopher? I know you’ve got more game than that.”

Alicia turns to smirk over her shoulder at him. “We’re waiting for you.”

“You never wait. Brat.” Nick sits next to Chris and bumps shoulders, companionable. “What were you going to ask?”

Chris is quiet for a moment and they let him think, Nick’s arm around Alicia’s waist and her fingers tapping absently on Chris’s shoulders, the flex of her thighs on his hips. “For you not to leave,” he admits. “For you to take me with you.”

Nick and Alicia look at each other. They kiss feather light, eyes open like it’s the first time. “I’m no good at promises,” Nick says, hoarse. “Okay?”

“Okay,” Alicia murmurs. Nick scoots behind Chris, easing his back down into Nick’s front, legs stretched out on either side. His hands rest lightly on Chris’s hips.

His lips press dry under Chris’s ear and Chris shivers. “Touch her,” Nick murmurs, and they all moan together, the same low pitch.

[pixelatedgremlin-blog]

((Rebooting closed rp with @sentinel-deadshot; everything up until this post is under the ‘read more’))

Rin studied the pictures Nate pulled out carefully and read the descriptions for each on the back. The Institute had been up to much more than anyone thought - there was a lot pictured here that Rin recognized as pre-war only from other books and photos she had seen. There must have been a purpose for it, one perhaps not inherently malicious, but everything involved with the Institute turned treacherous eventually. Not only that, but if they were planning to recreate the old world, did that bring everything,  including the bombs that caused this nuclear desolation, back into play?

Nate confessed that the Director of the Institute was his son, and Rin’s eyebrows went up almost to her hairline in her shock. She opened her mouth to speak, but promptly shut it again, thinking better of her initial reaction. She had to choose her words carefully if she wanted this discussion to remain cordial. If she had a child, Rin supposed she would love them no matter what they did.

“He must be talented if he was made Director so young,” she finally said. After all, Nate didn’t look that old, though all of the scarring gave him a more weathered appearance. “So if your son is the Director, does that mean this is you in these photos?” Rin pointed to the figure in the lab coat and the one in the Courser uniform that both bore a striking resemblance to Nate. As far as she could tell, it could have been him in the pictures; there was no telling when these photos were taken.

Rin tugged on the end of her braid as she thought, a nervous habit she had developed at fourteen when she learned that asking questions was not always wise. As much as she wanted to know more about what happened between Nate and his son, she had neither the right nor the obligation to pry; digging for the painful details with Nicky’s business, not hers. Nate had called himself a ‘thing’ again, and Rin tugged a little more insistently on her hair as her brow furrowed. He mentioned before that he wasn’t a synth, and he wasn’t a ghoul - the Brotherhood of Steel referred to even non-feral ghouls as ‘things’ rather than people, and if he was part of the Brotherhood… well, it would not matter, as they would not accept him among their ranks if he was, in fact, a ghoul. But then what was he? Because from Rin’s experience, anything that wasn’t human was put down in the name of ‘safety’ in the Commonwealth.

Sighing, she dropped her hand into her lap and looked up at Nate again. As tall as he was, he looked so out of place in her tiny home; he probably felt out of place too, so she smiled at him, though it was a sort of sad smile. “I know how difficult it can be when family starts falling apart. You’re not… are you dealing with this all by yourself?”

Diamond City. The Great Green Jewel of the Commonwealth. It was the last place post-war that still clung to shreds of pre-war values. From the protective wall to the clear class separation to the radio station itself - bless Travis’ nervous little heart - everyone put on the show that they were trying to preserve tradition and the values of the old world. Whether or not that was actually what was happening… Well, everyone had a different opinion on that. Rin didn’t say much about her feelings on the city and its residents. She nodded to the gate guard as he let her past, commenting his relief on her presence instead of Piper Wright, and made her way toward the small shack she called home.

Karina Andropov had a strange work schedule; she would spend anywhere from two to four weeks wandering around in the wasteland, helping caravans and other travelers by healing them up and selling supplies. She would return to Diamond City to spend a week with her siblings, make sure they were set in terms of food and other supplies, and then it was back into the Commonwealth. It wasn’t ideal for someone who devoted so much time to her two younger siblings, but it paid the bills, it wasn’t terribly faux-pas, and it allowed her to at least keep the few morals she had alive and well.

It wasn’t the ferals or the deathclaws or even the Big Bad Institute that gave Rin her nightmares, but the idea of anything happening to her siblings because of mistakes she had made as a teenager. They were her whole world, the reason she had done all of those terrible things that kept her up at night, and she would be damned if they were hurt on her account. The only person who knew the dark crevices of her history wasn’t even a Diamond City resident, and Rin preferred to keep it that way.

Today, however, Rin’s mind wasn’t on her demons or even on Anya and Nikolai. Instead, her head was miles away from here; she’d heard of a town called Sanctuary and a mysterious vault-dweller. If anyone knew anything about this recent turn of events, it would be Piper. The reporter was nosy and annoying, but she knew all of the latest gossip. She could also tell Rin if anything new was happening in Diamond City; for all that Detective Nick Valentine did for the Andropovs, Rin, hated bothering him with the trivial matters, especially when he was working a case. Maybe she would stick around a little longer this time and finally consider moving her siblings out of the corruption of Diamond City and its questionable mayor.

She was working the medical stand today in place of Dr. Sun, who was grateful to have a day off. He taught her everything he knew, and then she went and acquired other teachers in other places. Rin had always had a quick mind with a knack for absorbing information and putting her own flair on it. It was what drew people with agendas to her, and it was what made her decision to leave such a problem. Learning new tactics also meant learning secrets, not that she had any plan to maliciously spill those secrets. That would just attract unwanted danger. Diamond City, to the trained eye, was dangerous enough, especially since more and more visitors were walking around the market square these days.

sentinel-deadshot

Between all the residents, merchants and visitors, an heavily armored figure could easily be distinguished in the background. It often disappeared behind the various obstacles obstructing one’s sight of the market, but it was there… calmly moving, apparently disarmingly calm, even.

The figure, the thing most people recognized as ‘Deadshot’, hated the noises and the yelling of people ringing inside his head and ears… it always stunned him a little, worse than the explosion of a mininuke a few feet away from him.

Generally, the wasteland wasn’t the best place to be around anyway, but Deadshot had an important mission that required an extensive amount of energies and caused way too much stress for a normal human. He was on the quest to save his son, the only thing he had left of his previously happy life… things met a terrible fate when he found out his loved Shaun wasn’t a baby anymore… but a dying sixty years old man.

Time is a bastard.

Shocked, delusional, stressed and depressed beyond human belief, he continuously tried to drown his demons with drugs and alcohol - unfortunately problems always end up ‘floating’ without ever ending up temporarily forgotten as hoped. Deadshot ended up stepping down from his position of General of the Commonwealth Minutemen because of… unspecified reasons.

It was the price one had to pay for being alive… but was all the suffering worth it? He had no point in living anymore, without his family.

The endless questions about why life is such a pain to live stormed in his head as roamed around the market, hiding the worried and tired expression behind a mask and a pair of tactical glasses and hoping to find a doctor soon… not for himself, but for the big dog at his side, who had a few bullets stuck in his body.

‘Paladin’ Dogmeat, as the name on his custom made combat armour suggested, hardly ever got wounded, but every time it happened it was such a knife to the heart for Deadshot to hear him whine. Despite not loving having humans all around himself, the soldier loved animals far more than he was willing to admit.

“Vamos, chico.” He brushed a hand against the dog’s head to incite him to make just a little effort and reach the doctor’s stall… his voice didn’t sound human - at all. It was probably because of that mask of his, and a microphone changing the way one spoke and distorting the voice to something…ominous.

The man - or the thing, as he’d like to describe himself - moved slowly to reach the stall, stopping nearby the woman working in it and politely calling for her: “Madam?”

He wasn’t the best with manners as a kid, but right now, in this setting, the soldier appeared way too polite and good mannered to blend with the others… not that he wanted to, of course.

The man waited for response… his presence always ended up being ominous because of his height, but the weapons kept where everyone could see them weren’t suggesting hostility… Diamond City was the place he spent most time in when not on duty after all.

the-folly-of-rin Deactivated

It had been a rather slow day for Rin thus far; on the bright side, it meant that people in Diamond City were staying safe, but it also left Rin alone in her head a bit more often than she was used to while home. People stopped for idle chatter, sometimes one would buy a stimpak or another type of chem, but so far, the only person with whom she conversed extensively was Arturo. The weapons dealer was always interested in her stories from the wasteland - perhaps it was so that he knew what types of guns people would be buying, but it was still nice to be able to talk to someone so casually and not feel like they were staring into her soul. Nick Valentine had that uncanny ability, as did Piper when she was sniffing out her next big story, and even Vadim could give off that impression when he set his head one way and narrowed his eyes just slightly.

“Madam.” The voice behind her pulled Rin out of her thoughts and she spun around quickly to greet him.

“Good afternoon, what can I do-” Her words died in her throat when she had to crane her neck to make eye contact with the head about two feet above her own. The way her gaze raked over the broad expanse of power armor before finding the face of the owner of said armor made Rin feel like she took a hit of bad jet. Her blood ran cold, and she was sure that if she could stand outside her body and look at herself, she would be taking mental notes on how to improve staying calm when the only coherent sentiment her brain could produce was ‘panic.’

Outside of an occasional Raider, the only people who used suits of power armor were the Brotherhood of Steel, and this man certainly did not look like a Raider. Rin didn’t recognize him, though, which didn’t necessarily mean that he hadn’t been an Initiate or even a Knight when she was a Paladin there, but it gave her a tiny glimmer of hope that he didn’t know who she was and he wasn’t here to collect her to face consequences.

Rin cleared her throat and set her shoulders. “My apologies. What can I do for you today, sir?” Maybe having him as a patient - provided that he didn’t recognize her - would turn out to be beneficial. She could gain some information that would decide her next move, both out in the Commonwealth as well as in regards to her family. The prospect of a heavier Brotherhood presence in Diamond City made that settlement of Sanctuary look better by the minute.

sentinel-deadshot

“Hm.” The soldier was taken aback from the woman’s reaction, as studied her expression in curiosity. He could feel the panic in her yet find no reason behind that… unless the one he was dealing with was social anxious or an Outcast or… both. However, dealing with outcasts wasn’t his primary directive so it didn’t really matter.

It wasn’t rare seeing someone reacting badly at his presence, but panicking without reason? Strange.

“Didn’t mean to frighten you, madam.” The distorted voice spoke, with no apparent emotion in it, huge armored hands fiddling with the helmet that had been taken off… the piece of armor had some numbers on it: ‘204863’.

“I’m here because of my dog. He has been wounded in battle, against a Courser. I was wondering if you have some stimpacks or similar meds I can use on him. Promised I won’t take too much of your time.”

The armored soldier looked down at his dog, still whining a little and glancing at the doctor: “Cálmate, cachorrito.”

Deadshot was honestly so stressed he thought death from exhaustion was behind the corner… the Institute was doing its very best to kill off and replace him, and he had to eliminate clones of himself over and over again, being unable to sleep at night in fear of getting killed by a clone.

His grasp on reality was becoming weaker and weaker, and often made him question his own identity. However everything had little importance right now, as his biggest concern was the German Shepherd whining at his feet.

the-folly-of-rin Deactivated

Rin hadn’t even noticed the wounded dog beside the power armor, and once she looked down at the pooch, her expression softened. She knelt down and held out her hand for him to sniff, trying to get him to trust her before she started poking around. Rin hadn’t encountered many dogs out in the wasteland that didn’t try to kill her on sight, but she had a soft spot for those who couldn’t help themselves.

“Don’t worry. He’s still walking, which is a good sign for recovery,” she assured the man in front of her. It only took a couple of minutes to find the source of the animal’s pain; some bullets in the side would certainly do that. Rin stood and began rummaging around in her bag as well as Dr. Sun’s boxes for the supplies she needed. As she did so, she glanced over at the soldier again. Now that she was in her element, she was able to assess her situation a little more objectively. He was definitely a Brotherhood soldier; the ragtag militia of the Minutemen wouldn’t speak so stiffly, even if they managed to get their hands on a set of power armor to begin with. Speech patterns aside, the man mentioned getting up close and personal with one of those deadly Institute Coursers, at least close enough to get shot at. It was no secret that the arrival of the Prydwen in the Commonwealth provoked more public brawls between the Brotherhood soldiers and the Institute’s endless supply of forces.

He was polite, overly so for someone who grew up in the wasteland, and while it was unexpected to say the least, it didn’t go unappreciated. He wasn’t demanding and he didn’t seem suspicious - both were good signs. Above all else, he seemed to truly care about his canine companion, which meant that for the time being, this stranger and Rin shared a common priority.

“I’m going to need your help in keeping him calm first. I need the get the bullets out before giving him a stimpak. I’ll use a very small dose of Med-X to numb the area. I’ll then remove the bullets, clean the wound to prevent infection, and then give him the stimpak. I’m going to have to wrap a clean towel around his whole torso because regular bandages will get stuck to his fur. You should keep that on him overnight and check the area in the morning. If the scarring has started, you’re good to go, but if he still has open sores, come back.” Rin sat cross legged on the ground with her tray beside her. “Are you ready?”

sentinel-deadshot

“One moment please, madam.” The soldier had listened closely to what the doctor said… luckily some studies conducted in the past gave him the knowledge necessary to understand what she was talking about.

Deadshot took one second to step out of his trusted power armor to avoid causing accidents of any kind, then got closer to Dogmeat again, and kneeled down to scratch his head. It’s not like there wasn’t a heavy combat armor hiding under the bulk of steel anyway, so in case of ambush, the soldier was still ready to everything.

“Oi, cachorrito.” He said calmly, getting the attention of the dog and caressing his head again: “Quédate quieto, ¿de acuerdo? Va a estar bien…” The dog barked softly and licked his mask just a little, as he nodded and added: “Go right ahead, madam. He won’t bite.”

The soldier waited patiently for the doctor to begin the operation, studying every single move she made and swearing to never, ever bring a dog on field again. If some backup was needed, next time he was surely going to build a robot… at least those things don’t suffer, scream, bleed and… die.

It was a concept that would leave most people perplexed… why would a war machine even care for other’s lives? It’s made to kill anyway. The fun part is that the war machine in question, the one that was kneeling right next to Dogmeat, didn’t know. He didn’t know why he cared so much despite all that he had done and seen… maybe in the end, being exposed to other’s death doesn’t make you immune to the psychological damage it causes, but instead enhances the perception one has of the importance of life, and how much others lives matter, too. Despite all that, though, Deadshot wasn’t going to admit anything, not even the existence of compassion in that apparently dead soul of his… and he kept everything hidden behind that mask and fifty thousands lies.

the-folly-of-rin Deactivated

If Rin had bothered to look around at the other people wandering around the market, she would have noticed that the hulking tin can that was her current customer was attracting a little more attention than any other visitor that didn’t look like a metal giant. She was focused on her work, but even if she had noticed, it wouldn’t have mattered any more to her than if everyone was pointedly ignoring him. She had her own opinion about soldiers, and even then, that opinion varied (somewhat) from person to person. There had been a few of her fellow brothers and sisters in steel that she regretted to leave behind, but at the end of the day, she couldn’t agree with the fundamental beliefs of the Brotherhood of Steel. That didn’t make all of them reprehensible people, but that did make any one of them a potential threat. If anyone suspected this man of being a cold, unfeeling war machine, Rin could only comment on his concern for the dog at his side, and anyone who cared for animals couldn’t be completely without a soul.

However, she did notice that even under the power armor, the man was heavily protected. Rin wondered that if he ever shed his armor and the voice-distorting mask, would the dog even recognize him? If the man was going for a terrifying presence, she was sure he excelled at that, even though that wasn’t what had her spooked.

Even if her canine patient was wary of her, he trusted the soldier enough to listen to whatever it was he said because Rin made quick work of extracting the bullets and treating the wound. She set the slugs off to the side to wash and bring to Nick later; he should get first crack at them before Piper snatched them up for her (not uncalled for) smear campaign against the Institute.

“Make sure he takes it easy for a couple of days until he’s fully healed. The last thing you want is for his wounds to reopen because someone pushed him too hard. If you go to the Dugout Inn, Vadim will even feed him free of charge. He loves dogs. You can mention that he’s a patient of mine and you should get a room for free for as long as it takes to recover.” She gave a small, not entirely forced, smile to the man and a comforting scratch behind the ears of the pooch. “Oh, I’m Rin, by the way. That might help.” She stood, brushed off her knees and dumped the tray in the small sink of Sun’s chemistry station. It was easy enough work, and Rin had learned the value of having quick hands out in the wasteland. “Your squadron isn’t moving out soon, I hope?”

sentinel-deadshot

“I don’t really have a squadron, madam. I’m one of those units that works on its own.”

Deadshot stated, scratching Dogmeat’s head before standing up and looking for a bag of caps hidden somewhere in the pouches of the combat armor: “And I’m two-zero-four-eight-six-three, designation Deadshot; spy and assault unit. Pleased to make your acquaintance.”

The soldier moved to his power armor, took a sack of caps out one of the pouches near the torso, and got closer to Rin again: “Thanks for your help. I don’t know how much an operation normally costs, but this should contain something close to one thousand caps.”

Something was bothering him, as his eyes searched for a potential threat in the crowd. He felt watched, and hated that feeling… every time someone stared at him that way, something awful was about to happen.

the-folly-of-rin Deactivated

Rin raised an eyebrow at the man once he finished his lengthy introduction. There was something…off about being identified as a series of numbers, especially for the Brotherhood. It sounded a little too much like a synth designation to her, and after three years in the Brotherhood of Steel, she was aware that if this man gave any indication that he might be a synth, he would have been dealt with quicker than it would take to utter a recall code. On the other hand, it had been four years since she had given up her rank as Paladin and fled the Capital Wasteland, so they might have changed the way they referred to their soldiers. Given her experience with Elder Maxson, Rin certainly wouldn’t put it past him.

Regardless of her personal thoughts on the matter, she nodded. “Good to meet you too, uh, Deadshot.” There was no way she was going to call him by a string of numbers, even if she remembered what they were. She had to admit that she wasn’t all too thrilled at helping a spy, but something told her that if he was meant to spy on her, he wouldn’t admit it. Still, the quicker she could put this exchange behind her the better. Even if he had paid her way more than she was planning on charging him. For the dog as her patient, Rin was willing to take only enough caps to cover the supplies she used as well as maybe a Nuka Cherry or two for Nikolai on her way home. But one thousand caps? Well, she wasn’t going to argue if he had that much to hand out without even attempting to haggle down a price.

Rin looked from the sack of caps back toward Deadshot and opened her mouth to thank him when she noticed a sudden shift in his behavior. After taking care of her younger siblings for ten years, she knew how to pick up on when something was wrong. Even though she couldn’t see the man’s face, the way his shoulders tensed and his face moved as though he was looking for a target gave away enough to know that Rin should be concerned. “Is something the matter?”

sentinel-deadshot

“…heavy footsteps, using a stealth boy, has his scope locked on my head. Enough firepower to burn a normal human to ashes in the span of a few second, in that rifle. Another synthetic clone trying to kill me - the Director of the Institute has clear intentions of what to do with me. Act collected, madam… the synth is here for me only, there will be no casualties under my watch.”

He calmly took out his high-tech sniper rifle, looking almost way too calm for the situation - everything in his behavior gave away how used to having a gun pointed to his head he was really.

And it wasn’t even a lie: the soldier had been dealing with situations like this since he was fifteen… not too much of a big deal in his book, at this point and after all these years.

“Now please look away, it’s going to be a mess to witness… the others will barely even notice.” He added again, mounting a silencer on the weapon, still feeling the gaze of the copy on him.

the-folly-of-rin Deactivated

Rin’s eyes widened as Deadshot explained what he saw with cold, unfeeling accuracy. None of this seemed to bother him - she had seen synths with more emotion in the face of danger than this man. It contradicted everything she had just seen in his concern for the German Shepherd, but maybe that was just who he was. He cared more for the safety and well-being of others than himself. Rin could relate to that… but she was only speculating here.

He also mentioned the Director of the Institute and immediately Rin started looking around to see if anyone heard him speak. The slightest mention of the Commonwealth Boogeyman sent people around here into a frenzy, and if he was looking for people not to panic, talking about the Institute was not a good way to spread calm.

“‘Act collected’? Are you serious? You must be out of your mind if you think that aiming into a crowd is going to keep me collected,” she hissed, but knelt behind the metal table with only the top of her head peeking out enough so she could see what was happening. “If it’s going to be a mess, won’t they see the aftermath?” This time, she was asking herself the question more than the man with the sniper rifle. She wanted to see what this synth looked like; maybe just looking at it would tell her why it was after Deadshot. Rin may have been happy enough to let him go about his business before, but if he was trouble for the Institute, she wanted to know more. In particular, she wanted to help ensure that they wouldn’t start targeting more people in Diamond City because of his little visit. The thought of witnessing a messy death hardly bothered her; she’d seen - and caused - some gruesome acts of violence during her days with the Triggermen and then the Brotherhood.

sentinel-deadshot

“…quiet…” The soldier said in a whisper, after her questions caused a brief moment of distraction and let the courser shoot a very powerful bolt of blue laser to Deadshot’s stomach - okay, maybe it hurt just a little.

“These things have a puntería de mierda.” A quite arrogant, vaguely pained sounding, quiet chuckle escaped him as carefully adjusted the scope: “They may look like me, but the aim is awful.”

The soldier held his breath and planted an explosive bullet into the synth’s forehead in the shortest second… when the clone fell on the ground, his skull was barely still in one piece, most of the facial features became unrecognizable as well. The guards rushed to find out what was going on, and immediately tensed up as saw the coat the Courser was wearing - the market was now empty.

“They aren’t going to attack this place and the people living in it - just me. You’re safe, the thing is dead. Anyway, your assumption is mostly correct… I am out of my mind, yet have not ran amok just yet.” He spoke calmly as quickly reloaded his rifle and put it behind his back, where it belonged in those rare times a fight wasn’t behind the corner.

“Are you injured at all, Madam Rin? If not, I suppose we could… end this exchange here and pretend nothing happened. There are too many questions that would need an answer, and a scarcity of time to provide ‘em.”

He was… not very calm as sounded. The only thought that his son, flesh of his own flesh, would’ve wanted him dead so badly to continuously try to kill and replace him was a knife to the heart and some kind of boulder over his shoulders… also, the ray of laser to his stomach turned out being quite fastidious.

That sentence of his… the whole ‘let’s pretend nothing happened’ thing, actually managed to put a nostalgic little smirk on his face, remembering those exciting, adrenaline filled moments as a spy, with all the assassination done either bare handed or with a silenced weapon at his side…

“I suppose we’re done, here. I shall retrieve the chip in the synth’s body, and deliver the sample to the Brotherhood.” He stated trying not to get lost in his memories and also lying nonchalantly about the real porpoise behind the retrieving such devices - Coursers had something he absolutely needed to get his hands on: teleportation.

Being even faster had an incredible potential and could be another way to become even more productive, even more efficient and to save way more lives than expected. Obviously, he was more than willing to be his own guinea pig and experiment on himself - that’s what he was born for, in the end.

the-folly-of-rin Deactivated

“I’m…fine,” Rin murmured, still trying to make sense of everything that happened. First, and perhaps foremost, she had just witnessed a failed attempt made by the Institute to replace someone with their own copy. If Piper were here, she’d be all over this. The Institute was almost perfect in sending in replacements, because no one ever heard stories about someone taking out their exact copy. However, this man seemed to know what was coming, and he had taken out the synth, a Courser to boot, with terrifying accuracy.

Second, aside from the security officers, people had fled the market into the safety of their homes. Everyone would be in a frenzy once the immediate danger passed and they had time to concoct wild rumors, but for now, there were no prying eyes. No matter what he said, this was the best time to get some of her questions answered.

Third, Deadshot had just admitted to being in league with the Brotherhood - something Rin had only guessed at until now - and while she should have been happy to honor his request to part ways, something in her gut was telling her that there was more to this than met the eye. She shouldn’t want any part of this; she had to take care of Anya and Nikolai, not go running off to uncover one of the biggest secrets of the Commonwealth. And yet…

“Wait a minute!” Rin reached out as though to grab his arm, but stopped short of touching him. “You got shot. I can take a look at it, no charge.” She looked around. “You could… come to my house? We’d be away from curious eyes and my sister should be getting dinner started soon if you’re not interested in waiting for Takahashi’s noodles.” This was a bad idea, inviting this soldier home around her siblings, but her desire to know something more about the fiasco that had just occurred was overruling everything else in her brain right now. Maybe if she had more answers, she could find a way to either stop the madness from reaching her family or make it happen faster so it could just be over already.

sentinel-deadshot

As soon as Rin got closer, he took a step back to keep a distance, with what seemed a nervous, annoyed grunt: he didn’t like being touched or having humans getting too close… you can never guess what’s going on in their unpredictable minds after all.

“…you should probably get going and take care of your sister. Family is… important. Hold it dear, madam.”

He looked down at where the laser bolt was shot, realizing the combat armor had gone to ashes in that spot… had it not been for the presence of it, he would have been dead by now.

Apparently Shaun had taken very seriously his father’s refusal to help the Institute… but after what was said and done, such a response was… inevitable, to say the very least. The wound hurt for sure, but what caused more and more pain was knowing the reason behind it, behind why would the Institute want him dead.

It’s not like he wasn’t used to being a moving target, though: before the war the Reds were after him anyway… but knowing that his beloved, long lost son was behind all of this, always filled his heart with nothing but regret and self hatred. “I’ve heard it said a thousand times, but now I know - you don’t know what you’ve got, until it’s gone.” This time, the microphone just wasn’t functioning anymore, and his voice full of regret could be heard in a whisper, from behind the mask.

For once, he didn’t sound completely inhuman - apparently that microphone of his, was completely erasing the tone and accent, distorting the voice to something terrifying and cold, and now that it wasn’t functioning anymore…

“I… should probably get going too, Miss Rin. I’ll be fine…” It was better to get back home before all the weight of his memories and intrusive thoughts crushed him.

And yet, on a second thought, he wasn’t completely suspicious about this particular human - she had agreed on helping Dogmeat, in the end… she couldn’t be that dangerous, right?

the-folly-of-rin Deactivated

Deadshot’s reaction had Rin drawing her hand back as quickly as it had gone out; she meant him no harm, and she was sure he knew that, but reactions and habits weren’t formed baselessly. That was something she knew all too well. At first, she wasn’t entirely sure it was him who was speaking; whatever was in the mask that changed his voice had broken, and now he sounded…more human. It was also easier to read him, and when he spoke of family, Rin could hear something akin to sorrow or regret. All she could do was nod; she held her siblings dear every day, even when she wasn’t with them. They were the driving force behind almost everything she did, and she would not hesitate to give her life if it meant keeping them safe. Part of it was a promise she had made to herself a long time ago, that no matter what happened in the world, she would keep what was left of her family together and safe. But a small, unacknowledged part of it was perhaps selfish, the idea that without them, Rin had nothing left to live for. If one took Anya and Nikolai out of the equation, Rin had done some terrible, unforgivable things. “If you need anything else, Dr. Sun will be here tomorrow, or my house is back behind the market, next to Valentine’s Detective Agency,” she offered. She doubted he would actually take her up on that offer, but she couldn’t just leave him here without somewhere to go in case of emergency. “Good luck out there, it looks like you’re going to need it…” Rin’s gaze shifted over toward where the security officers were finishing up with the Courser’s mess, but it didn’t linger very long. It took an even shorter time for her to pack up her supply bag, leave a few caps in the box for Sun, and then head off toward Sheng Kowalski’s stand. He mainly sold purified water, but he was known to have a couple bottles of Nuka Cola every now and then.

sentinel-deadshot

“Farewell, ma'am…” The soldier saluted watching her leave, then jumped back on his power armor and made his way to his home on the upper stands.

He didn’t… love doctors and scientists, especially if they were not of his… kind.

Back before the war, when he was still a living guinea pig, scientists continuously experimented on him… Sixty-Three even found himself having perfectly sane bones completely replaced with something much more resistant, having his own designation scarred on his skin forever, becoming immune to radiation like a ghoul and even being unable to age… there wasn’t a cell left untouched in his body.

Well… he hated all of that, he just wanted to be a normal human with a normal life. The memories of scarring, horrid things people had done to him made trusting humans a foreign concept… saying he was afraid of them was the least one could say about his conduct.

…but in the end, there wasn’t humanoid creature he fully trusted. Sometimes even his kind was dangerous… and a reminder of that, occurred in a span of a few hours from that moment he set foot back home. Deadshot will probably never remember clearly what happened that night, but the memory of the day after won’t be able to leave his mind, ever.

He woke up in a alleyway in Goodneighbor, in a pool of his own blood… and soon had to escape from a squadron of Gunners, running with no weapons or resistant armor on, a concussion going on, a broken arm and a few stab wounds on the broken limb, that were causing a noticeable blood loss.

The soldier covered up the permanently beaten up face as soon as got in Diamond City (he looked quite different with normal clothes on), stumbled his way to the doctor’s stall and blurted something with a confused voice and a brain fog as soon as saw that familiar human again: “Madam Rin?”

Now, it wasn’t like being kidnapped and tortured was something excessively shocking to a thing like him, but hearing a twisted, creepy and familiar snickering coming from one of the Gunners made him lose his cool at a nearly hilarious pace.

the-folly-of-rin Deactivated

Rin hadn’t been the only one to close up early; only Takahashi’s noodle stand opened up again after the incident. Rin went to Sheng’s and picked up a few Nuka Colas and a few Nuka Cherries, as well as a couple of cans of purified water for her next trip out. It wouldn’t be for a few days at least, but it never hurt to be prepared. By the time she made it over to the Dugout Inn to pick up a bottle of whiskey from Vadim, everyone in town had heard about the Courser. Some of the stories were wilder than others - Moe was spinning some tale about how the Courser looked him dead in the eyes before getting shot. No one asked for Rin’s opinion and she didn’t volunteer it; instead, she engaged Vadim in some light-hearted banter, dropped off a couple of Addictols to Yefim (who kept them on hand for guests who were having too good of a time) and headed home. True to form, Anya had made some sort of mole rat stew which smelled good enough to deter from the fact that it was mole rat in the stew. Nikolai asked about the synth in the market and Rin told him not to spread rumors and to eat his tatos. She decided to save the conversation about moving to one of the new settlements popping up around the Commonwealth for another night; she had not yet made up her mind about moving, and she wanted to see if she heard any more about the settlements and the Minutemen before making a decision. After Nikolai was in bed, she explained the scene she had witnessed a bit more to Anya and told her to keep an eye out for Deadshot. From the way Anya pursed her lips, Rin knew her younger sister didn’t like the idea of having an outsider in their home, but she didn’t say anything about it. Rin knew it was stupid of her to be so trusting of this soldier, a man she hardly knew, who tried his damnedest to conceal his identity, but there had been something in the way he cared for his dog, and took out the Courser with the efficiency to spare everyone else in the market, and spoke about family, that had Rin second-guessing her initial distrust of him. The next day dawned and she was out at the medical stand again. It never hurt to make some extra caps on the side, and Dr. Sun was more than happy to have a couple of days to himself. Rin suspected he was seeing someone on the side, but she’d never breathe a word to anyone except Nick, who was very good at keeping a lid on rumors. Arturo stopped briefly to ask if she and her siblings were doing okay after yesterday, and told her to stop by his place before she headed out again to pick up some ammo he had set aside for her. It was shortly after he left that Rin was pulled away from a very nice thought indeed by a familiar voice. He looked terrible, death on legs really, and she had only a fraction of a second while her brain kicked into gear to wonder how he managed to stumble to her stand without drawing attention to himself. He wasn’t in the power armor this time, and Rin grimaced as she looked him over. “Come around and sit before you pass out. You look like shit,” she said, maneuvering to stand close enough to catch him if he started to fall, but not touching him. “I’m not going to ask what you got yourself into, but if this happened here in Diamond City, you should talk to someone on the security team.”

sentinel-deadshot

“Thanks…” The social anxiety, shyness and introversion normally made talking to stranger a bit difficult than expected, and the concussion the man had was not making things easier. He followed did as asked in silence, and sat down with a small sigh.

“I normally wouldn’t bother anyone with this, but I’m afraid I couldn’t… do much with this uh… concussion.” He added sounding confused: “And it wasn’t here… more or less. I just got, uh, kidnapped and tortured just a little…” A stunned chuckle: “The drill, in other words. You get used to it over the years.”

At the moment, the soldier had little control of what he said, and in other circumstances he would have never even hinted at what was said in the last sentence.

Deadshot was… confused and scared, deep down to his heart. Normally being captured like that wasn’t too much of a big deal, but hearing that creepy snickering coming from a figure a bit taller than him, was a dead giveaway of the presence of his father. Terrifying memories from a long gone past were spinning in his head, in a ironic remembrance of how everything started: with a baseball bat bashed to his cranium hundreds of years earlier… and today it could have ended in the same, god damned way.

All those memories sent the coldest shiver up and down his spine, as he muttered something confused under his breath in a sentence that had Spanish words mixed up with Chinese and English ones.

“Uh… I, uh… just need something to get me back on field… I guess? There’s a lot of… rebuilding, s-saving and… and stuff to do.” He was confused, tired, and honestly just wanted to carry on with his duties, focusing also on rebuilding his home back in Sanctuary. A friend of his, Ulf, was doing their very best a mechanic and engineer could do… but time was needed to see the place back to its prewar state.

the-folly-of-rin Deactivated

Rin had to bite the inside of her cheek to keep herself from interrogating the man. Torture was a peculiar modus operandi, one not often seen in the Commonwealth except when one stumbled upon the final, lethal result. Either Deadshot’s captor wished to send a very specific message or he hadn’t been meant to survive and managed to escape anyway. She supposed it didn’t matter in the moment; he didn’t appear to sustain any gun injuries, otherwise she would have to ask what kind of ammunition was used and then look for bullet fragments. “It’s not something anyone should get too used to. That’s when they start ignoring symptoms,” she said quietly. Rin wasn’t one to judge anyone for their lifestyle - after the things she had done, she had no right - but that didn’t stop her from giving advice to try to minimize injury and death. She urged him to stretch out on the exam table, giving her unrestricted access to his arm, which seemed to require the most attention. There wasn’t much she could do for the concussion except wait for medicine to take effect. When he mentioned going back out in the field, Rin gave him the look that Nick affectionately termed ‘Mama Yao Guai’. “Your head must really be messed up if you think I’m letting you back out in the field in this condition.” She would babysit him at the Dugout Inn if she had to, but this time, Rin was not letting her patient walk away. “Okay, I’m going to give you a stimpak for your head first, try to get the swelling down as quickly as possible. Next, I’m going to sterilize the stab wounds on your arm and bandage them, and then set the break and stimpak your arm. Last, I have a very diluted dose of psycho; it’ll keep you from falling asleep with that concussion until the stimpak runs its course.” Once she had her supplies pulled out, she looked Deadshot over again and frowned slightly. “I don’t care if you keep your face covered, but you’ll need to let me access your neck for the first stimpak.”

sentinel-deadshot

“I know one shouldn’t be used to that, but humans are capable of doing this and much, much more. Machines too.”

The soldier sighed and hesitated for a long second on the mask, knowing it had to be taken off. He sighed and shook his head, taking his glasses off first: “I’m going to regret this.”

Once the disguise was off, the smells, the lights turned out being more fastidious than remembered, as he frowned a little and looked away in embarrassment, wiping away some blood from his nose. He had some deep, very recent scars on his cheeks and throat, the nose was probably healing from getting broken, same thing with a fading black eye… the other scars seemed quite old… enough to make one wonder how old he really was. Without the jacket hiding them, his arms were both covered in scratches and small wounds - some of them had a suspicious shape -, the left forearm and both his hands were bandaged… he seemed to be living through a bad time, judging by all the other bandages that could be seen from his short sleeved shirt… a pair of holotags and one of old dogtags even suggested him ‘belonging’ to two different armies.

“D-don’t worry too much about the whole field thing. Back in Anchorage the reds shot me in the heart, knees and tossed me into a frozen lake. I’m still here, yeah? I’m hard to kill.” The soldier nervously bit his lower lip, as let Rin work on his wounds: “Mierda, I keep olvidar… forgetting how long it has been… umh… s-sorry, Madam Rin.” Deadshot finally went quiet with a sigh, as distracted himself trying to repair the microscopic microphone in his mask with his free hand, asking himself what humans would think if they all knew about the thing he was, and even wondering what to do after the fall of the Institute. ‘I’ll probably just… donate myself to science…’ weirdly enough, his mind didn’t find the thought terrible.

He just didn’t think being a lab rat was a big deal when it came to himself… that’s how his life as a soldier started anyway.

“Madam… my apologies for… not being cooperative enough.” The words escaped his mouth without real control… it just was something he used to say out of etiquette… he surely wasn’t going to let his manners die like the wasteland apparently did, hundreds of years earlier.

the-folly-of-rin Deactivated

Rin sucked in a sharp breath when the mask came off and then quickly looked over her shoulder to see if anyone was lingering around her stand. They weren’t, thankfully, but she maneuvered her body to block prying gazes as best she could. If he was worried about his identity getting out, she’d help him keep that secret. When she looked back at him, Rin studied the wounds on his face closely. “These look fresh too… the stimpak should help soothe the eye, and I can set your nose since it doesn’t seem to be very far along in healing itself.” At this point, she spoke more to herself than Deadshot, laying out a plan to maximize efficiency.

Once she set to work, though, Rin stopped trying to guess at all of the different injuries she saw on Deadshot’s exposed skin. He wasn’t decked out in the full armor she had last seen him in, so the marks on his skin were concerning to say the least. Of course, she had scars of her own in places no one would guess, and she was willing to bet that there was even more evidence of a life of violence mapped out in places she couldn’t see, but unless he asked for her help with anything else, she wasn’t going to pry… for now. Something that Dr. Sun always said to his patients was, ‘Don’t ruin my hard work by dying out there,’ and Rin was beginning to understand what he meant the longer she worked to keep the people of the Commonwealth healthy and in one piece. It was heartbreaking to return to a settlement or run across a group of raiders she had helped in the past and find that someone she had seen just the week prior was no longer walking this earth.

“You hush now,” Rin replied as she went to work cleaning up his arm. She could already see the medicine from the stimpak starting to take effect in the fresh wounds on his face. They wouldn’t fully heal, but he had gotten to her quick enough that the lines of the scars would be fainter than the others on his face. Once she was finished with the rest of his fresh injuries, she would clean up the blood leftover on his face, but she wanted the wounds to heal as much as possible before doing so. She wasn’t about to cause an infection or any undue discomfort. “You don’t have to apologize for doing your job so long as you don’t expect an apology from me for doing mine.”

By the time she had finished on his arm and dampened a clean rag with some purified water for his face, about half an hour had passed. Rin was used to working in the field where time was of the essence. “I know you turned down my offer last time, but I really want you to consider crashing at my place. I still have some of my dad’s old clothes you could borrow while washing the blood out of yours, and you could do with a hot meal. Plus, I can keep an eye on how you’re healing up and you’d be able to be back in the field tomorrow morning.”

sentinel-deadshot

He had stayed still the whole time, twitching nervously from time to time for having a human this close: she could’ve stabbed him in the throat any second… he had an incredibly big bounty on his head and it was only going to increase in value over time, as there was no way in hell he’d stop doing what’s right.

As soon as Rin was finished with his face, he immediately reached out for his shades with a sigh and slightly shaking hand: “I can’t stand lights…” The mask was put back on his face very soon as well: “…and smells…”

The soldier sighed again, tired: “And alright, madam. I guess you’re not trying to kill me just like the others…” He spoke calmly, almost in a whisper, avoiding eye contact and fidgeting with the bandages on his hands: “They seem to find pleasure in the struggle of other beings. I can never understand why. Ah well… I apologize for my mistrust… it’s not intended… lots want me dead and I need to postpone that until the fall of the… you know.” He put his jacket back on, zipped it up and covered his head with the hood. “Perhaps this isn’t the right of place for this kind of talk, madam. Thanks for your help - at the moment I don’t have any caps on me, but I’ll get some as soon as I get back home… it’s not far away, only on the upper stands.”

It normally would’ve bothered him to just make an appearance at someone else’s home, but something told him this person had more than a reason to invite over a stranger. Something in what had happened the previous day had made her curios.

“Madam?” He turned around to look at her as soon as got back on his feet: “I know something made you curios in the witnessing of yesterday’s scenario. I can provide some intel obtained about the Institute, gained from circa eleven months spent in the wasteland making my research on them. It’s not strictly Brotherhood related business, so sharing is permitted. This nightmare will be cancelled shortly anyway.”

the-folly-of-rin Deactivated

Rin wished that she could be shocked by his suspicion that she would try to kill him, but she knew that it wasn’t her so much as it was everyone else in the Commonwealth. As Deadshot sat up and pulled on his sweatshirt, Rin started washing her hands and cleaning up the dirty rags and used syringes; she wasn’t sure how much she should say to him, a Brotherhood soldier, but he had trusted her with his injuries, including showing his face, which seemed to be a sensitive thing for him, so she should show him at least a little respect when it came to her own affairs. After all, anyone with whom she interacted could potentially be a target if someone unfriendly finally caught up with her.

“Trust me, I know all about being a target. It’s a shitty situation, always having to look over your shoulder.” Her voice was low enough for only him to hear, but once she was done with the cleanup, the dark expression faded from her face and her tone returned to normal. “Don’t worry about the money, you paid me more than enough last time. But upper stands? How long have you been a Diamond City resident? I don’t remember seeing you around here before, and I grew up here.” Rin slung her bag over her shoulder and headed around the outer perimeter of the market to avoid attracting attention. She was sure it was difficult to keep a low profile considering how he towered above pretty much everyone, but if there was one thing she had learned over the years, it was that people around here usually kept their inquiries to hushed rumors until the guns came out, and once that started happening around Deadshot, no one stood a chance.

He mentioned her curiosity, and Rin couldn’t stop the chuckle that escaped her lips. Of course it had been obvious, even when she had been unsure about getting involved. “Yeah… you could say that. And I get having to keep information confidential, but whatever you can disclose about the situation, I’m all ears.” She paused for a moment. It was still early in the day, which meant that they would have plenty of time to talk about the Institute and what happened with the Courser the day before. “Look, this is a big deal, and I want to help in any way I can, but I don’t want my siblings to get involved. Fortunately, Nikolai is still in school for a few hours and Anya’s out patrolling outside the wall until late tonight. I try to keep them out of this as much as possible, and my choices have put them in enough danger as it is. But as long as I can lend a hand without them knowing, well, let’s just say I want the threat neutralized as quickly as possible.”

It wasn’t long before they passed Valentine’s Detective Agency and reached the Andropov household. Rin unlocked the door and flipped on the lights. It was small, hard to believe that there had once been plans for five people to live here. It never got to that, but Rin knew that they wouldn’t have been able to afford one of the larger abodes in the upper stands, at least, not without disclosing where the extra income had been coming from. There was a small loft with a double bed, and a sleeping bag on the ground in a corner of the main floor. Dishes were drying next to the sink and there was a small stack of books and the latest edition of Publick Occurrences on the coffee table in front of the sofa. Next to the sleeping bag was a large trunk with a padlock on it, and on top of that, more books. It looked well lived in, even if one-third of the family spent little time here. “Make yourself comfortable and I’ll make us some lunch.”

sentinel-deadshot

“I’m…” For a second, he struggled to even speak. He could hardly ever understand why, but always assumed it was his tendency to carefully choose the words that had to be said… he knew the consequences of a sentence said in the wrong tone, and how brutal they could be. Last time it happened, he got his face bashed against the floor twenty times.

“Thanks, but I’m not hungry…” He politely sat down on the couch, and found the lights dim enough to take off his disguise again. “Truth to be told, I bought that place a month ago, but don’t spend much time in there. The Commonwealth is a relatively new place to me anyway.” A small pause: “And by the way, people call me Nate. Deadshot is just a codename things like me have, while the series of number is what our names actually consist of after our identities have been successfully erased. I shouldn’t be saying this, but my owners have gone to ashes long ago… and no, I am not a synth. Lots tend to ask this.”

Nate was nervous about being in a stranger’s home… years of experience taught him that even the most innocent looking people of things were capable of doing the most horrifying things. His eyes wandered around the room in suspicion, trying to find any hint of the presence of a trap. “Again, you don’t seem like you’re trying to kill me… I’m used to much more…hate.”

He tried to distract himself and kept working on the small, broken microphone… Nate couldn’t stand seeing, let alone hearing himself, that’s why he held that small piece of technology so dear. Done with the microphone in the span of a few seconds, he started fiddling with his modified pipboy, that seemed to have a few ‘gadgets’ attached to it, other than a black paint job and a red HUD.

“I suppose you have a husband and kids to take care of - don’t worry, I’ll leave shortly and start looking for some leftover caps in my home…” He sighed, then added in a whisper: “…assuming Grunt left any, of course…”

the-folly-of-rin Deactivated

“Okay… Nate,” Rin replied with a small smile. He looked about ready to bolt - not that she could blame him - so she wanted to try to make him feel as comfortable as possible. It surprised her to see that he was comfortable enough to take off his mask once he’d picked his spot on the couch, but she didn’t comment on that; if anything, she’d check the injuries there later to see how they were healing up. Even though he said he wasn’t hungry, Rin started making enough grilled radstag for two. If he still didn’t eat, then she’d save the rest for Nikolai when he got home. “I don’t want to kill you. I don’t want to kill anyone.” And it was the truth; Rin had her fair share of killing in the past, and now she was trying to help people live. That wasn’t to say she wouldn’t pull a gun on someone who threatened her or her family, but she wouldn’t enjoy it. She never had enjoyed it and maybe that was part of the problem. “I know that trust is earned, and out in the wasteland it’s hard to find a reason to trust someone, but I’m here to help people.” She suspected he knew that already, considering he had sought her out after whatever had caused his injuries. ‘Torture,’ he mentioned, but Rin guessed there was more to it than that. Before she could think too long on that, Nate said something about her having a husband and kids, and she snorted in amusement. “I’m sorry, it’s just… ah, no, I’m not married. I live here with my two younger siblings, Anya and Nikolai. Nikolai is only eleven, so he’s the closest thing to a kid around here.” It didn’t take too long for the radstag to cook, and soon, Rin set a large plate down on the coffee table and sat on the floor opposite of where Nate was sitting on the couch. It accentuated their height difference even more, but the last thing Rin wanted to do was crowd him. Where to begin? He was clearly nervous, and she didn’t want to bring up something too personal. After all, he offered to ease her curiosity about the Institute, not necessarily about himself. “So you mentioned yesterday that the Director of the Institute is after you. You know that he’s sending synths to replace you, and you’re able to stop them before it happens. I guess what I’m trying to ask is: why do they want you gone? I’ve never heard of anyone seeing their replacement and being able to stop them before.”

sentinel-deadshot

Nate went silent for a long second, just watching Rin sitting on the floor… he was perplexed, as raised his scarred eyebrow a little, but decided to not ask. “Sorry for misunderstanding.” He apologized looking down at the steak, feeling no hunger at all; it had been a long while since the last meal - that solely consisted in Fancy Lads Snack cakes - but he just didn’t feel like eating.

“Thanks for the food, but I just am not hungry… sorry.” The soldier sighed slightly, as rummaged though a few hidden pockets in his jacket. A few photos came out of one of them, and Nate laid them on the table. “For starters, this is the Institute, what it looks like from the inside. I took pictures and snatched some really useful pieces of tech I will use to restore… my old home.”

The photos pictured the artificial flora and fauna that the facility hid, the technology they used, the making of gen 3 Synths, the SRB, the coursers, the advanced medical supplies, the unfinished reactor, the making of gen 1 Synths, and a chamber in which the Gen 3s often got memory wiped… a brief description of everything was written in the back of the photos with a very elegant handwriting.

There were two weird details in the photos, things that probably Nate himself didn’t notice: in the background of the making of the older Synths, an exact copy of him in a lab coat was sitting down and writing something, while in the chamber dedicated to the memory wipe of Synths, another copy in full courser gear was creepily staring at the camera, when it seemed obvious it should have been… not even lucid.

“See, the Institute wants me dead because they know what I am, and they wanted a thing like me at their side to destroy the Minutemen, the Brotherhood and the Railroad. Obviously, I declined, since they destroyed something extremely important to me… well, more or less, that’s how things went. Oh, another detail… the Director of the Institute is… well, how to put it… he’s my… uh… my son…” The last sentence was said with hesitation and embarrassment, like he didn’t want to admit his own failure as a parent…