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#tried a bit of a new colouring style
voidcanarys · 8 months
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(click for quality)
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needahugfromesme · 7 months
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It's time for Carlisle and Esme to make their 1950s photos into funny Christmas cards
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hanashiz · 4 months
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Monkey D. Luffy
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shootingst4rpress · 5 months
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She said better luck next time, don't worry so much Without ears I couldn't hear, I could just feel the touch As I feel asleep softly at the edge of a cave I should have gone deeper but I'm not so brave
- When I Was Done Dying, Dan Deacon
late secret file finale piece ^_^ closeups and commentary under the cut
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i've been feeling kind of dissatisfied with my digital art recently, feeling like i'm just doing the same thing every time so i wanted to shake it up a bit! i did some analogue papercut stuff for a project and i really enjoyed it, so i wanted to try and recreate the layered paper + coloured pencil look digitally. I think it went really well! i also tried to be very careful and planned about my colours and do a proper colour scheme... unsure how much i stuck to that but the piece came together very well :] i do think there's some weirdness in how the detailed bits and areas of attention are concentrated, but this is a new style so, yaknow, still ironing out the creases. thanks for reading!
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kandavers · 10 months
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First off love your art! Question?: How bashful can Wally make us?
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Answer?: Very.
Gee, I wonder what he is Saying 😇
Ps. I tried a new pallette for my doodles… Let me know if you like this better than my Previous Style! :> I’m trying to Play Around with the Colours a little bit to Improve my Art! ^^
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kinnbig · 4 months
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✨ Simple Gif Colouring for Beginners ✨
I wrote up my basic gif colouring process for a friend recently, but a couple of people here mentioned they'd also find it helpful! so, as requested, this is a beginner-friendly walkthrough of the way I colour my gifs :) it's aimed at brand new gif makers with no prior experience with photoshop or photo editing.
when I first started gif making I found colouring and photoshop in general suuuper daunting, so I've tried to simplify everything here as much as possible. hopefully this will be relatively easy to follow and not too intimidating!
a couple of things to begin with:
I'm only talking about colouring here - this is not a full gif making tutorial. I've linked to some of my favourites of those here!
I personally like to make bright, 'clean' looking gifs with vibrant but natural colours, so that is the style of colouring this tutorial is geared towards. most of gif colouring is subjective and about personal taste - the only thing that I'd say is possible to get wrong is skin tones, which I talk about a lot in this guide.
as I mostly gif Thai dramas, most of the advice is geared towards colouring for East Asian/South East Asian skin tones - but the techniques should be fairly universally applicable (and here are some tutorials that talk about gif colouring for other skin tones).
I'm not an expert! I'm not claiming this is the best or the only way to colour gifs - it's just how I do it.
this post is very image-heavy. if the images aren't loading (or the gifs are running slowly or cutting/looping weirdly), then try viewing the post in its own tab (rather than on the your dash or someone's blog) and refreshing the page.
okay, full walkthrough beneath the cut!
contents:
1. intro a. natural gif colouring goals b. very very basic colour theory 2. super simple colouring (the essentials) a. curves b. selective colour (and skin tone correction) c. hue/saturation d. saving and reusing colouring e. another simple colouring example 3. other adjustment layers a. brightness/contrast b. levels c. vibrance d. colour balance e. channel mixer 4. troubleshooting a. curves b. saturation 5. fin!
1. intro
the colouring part of gif making can be super overwhelming, especially if (like me when I first started!) you're completely new to photoshop and/or have no experience with colour theory or photo/video editing.
if you're opening photoshop and making gifs for the first time, I highly recommend getting used to making a few basic, uncoloured gifs to begin with. just to practice, rather than post anywhere (though you can always come back and colour them later if you want) - but it'll make the rest of the process much easier if you're already beginning to get used to working in timeline mode of photoshop. give yourself a bit of time to practice and get a feel for things like how many frames you tend to like in a gif, where you like to crop them for the best loop, what kind of aspect ratio you like etc* - so that you're not trying to navigate all of that for the first time on top of everything else!
* frames: for me between 60-90 frames is ideal, but 40-120 frames is the absolute min-max I'd personally use in a normal gifset loops: for the smoothest loops, try to avoid cutting someone off mid-movement or mid-word if possible. aspect ratio: for full-size (540px) gifs, I tend to go for either 8:5 (slightly 'skinnier' gifs), 7:5, or 5:4 (particularly big, thick gifs lmao)
✨ natural gif colouring goals
part of what can be so daunting about starting gif making is not knowing where to start or what you want to achieve. this is definitely something that gets easier with practice - the more gifs you make, the more you'll get a feel for what kind of look you like and the more instinctively you'll know how to get there. it also helps to see if any gif makers you like have made "before and after colouring" posts - these can help with getting a sense of the kinds of changes made through gif colouring. here's one I made!
in general, I like to make my gifs bright and 'clean' looking, with vibrant but natural colours. these are the things I'm usually hoping to achieve with colouring:
brighten dark scenes
remove muddy, yellowish lighting or filters
saturate colours
correct any skin lightening filters or overexposure
make lighting and colours as consistent as possible between gifs within a single gifset, especially gifsets featuring gifs from multiple scenes/episodes/videos
this guide is focusing on natural colouring, but of course there are many cool ways to make stylised/unnaturally coloured gifs. imo you'll need to master these basics first, but if you want to learn how to do things like change the background colour of gifs or use gradients or other cool effects, then @usergif's resource directory has loads of super helpful tutorials!
✨ very very basic colour theory
[disclaimer! I don't know shit about fuck. I do not study light or art. this is just an explanation that makes sense to me exclusively for the purposes of gif making.]
the primary colours for light/digital screens are red, blue, and green. having all three colours in equal measures neutralises them (represented by the white section in the middle of the diagram).
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so to neutralise a colour within a gif, you need to add more of the colour(s) that are lacking.
in practice this usually means: the scene you want to gif is very yellow! yellow is made of red and green light, so to neutralise it you need to add more blue into your gif.
it can also mean the reverse: if you desaturate the yellow tones in a gif, it will look much more blue.
looking at the colour balance sliders on photoshop can make it easier to visualise:
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so making a gif more red also means making it less cyan.
removing green from a gif means adding magenta.
taking yellow out of a gif will make it more blue.
tl;dr:
neutralise yellows by adding blue (and vice versa)
neutralise reds by adding cyan (and vice versa)
neutralise green by adding magenta (and vice versa)
2. super simple colouring (the essentials)
starting with a nice sharpened gif in photoshop in timeline mode. (these are the sharpening settings I use!)
some scenes are much harder to colour than others - it helps to start out practising with scenes that are bright/well-lit and that don't have harsh unnaturally coloured lights/filters on. scenes with a lot of brown/orange also tend to be harder.
I usually save a base copy of my gif before I start colouring just in case I end up hating it, or find out later that it doesn't quite fit right into a set and need to redo it etc.
so here is my base gif!
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it's an okay gif, but it has a bit of a yellow tint to it that I want to reduce.
colouring is easiest to do in adjustment layers, which can be found under layer -> new adjustment layer - or for me they are here:
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there are lots of different types of adjustment layers that do lots of different things - but for me the absolute essentials for colouring are curves, selective colour, and hue/saturation.
I also use brightness/contrast, levels, exposure, vibrance, colour balance, and channel mixer sometimes, depending on the gif - but I use curves, selective colour, and hue/saturation on every single gif.
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✨ curves layer
the first thing I always do is a curves layer. when you first open one it will look like this:
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first I usually click the ‘auto’ button, just to see what happens. sometimes it makes a big difference (it usually brightens the gif a lot) - but on this gif it didn’t do much.
if it had made the gif look nicer then I would have kept it and added a second curves layer on top to do the rest of these steps.
the next step is selecting the white and black points with the little eyedropper tools.
the bottom eyedropper lets you pick a white point for the gif. click somewhere super light on the gif to see what happens - for this gif, I clicked on the lampshade on the left. if it looks weird, I just undo it and try somewhere else - it usually takes a few goes to find something that looks good.
here's what that did to the gif:
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then I pick the top eyedropper and use it to pick a black point by clicking somewhere really dark, again playing around until I find a black point that looks good.
here's what the gif looks like after picking the white and black points:
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this can take some experimenting, but you can make super easy drastic changes to your gif just with this. in this case, the curves layer took out a lot of that yellowy tint.
and this is what the curves graph looks like now:
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you can click and drag those lines to make further changes if you want - I usually leave them alone though. the colours of the lines indicate which colours have been changed in the gif - for example, you can see from that steep blue line on the graph that blue has been added to neutralise those yellows.
next I usually do another curves layer and just press the ‘auto’ button again to see what happens. usually it brightens the gif a bit more, which I like.
‼️if nothing is working: usually with a bit of fucking about a curves layer works well - but sometimes you can’t find a good white and black point anywhere, and instead your gif turns wacky colours and nothing looks good. this happens more often with very heavily colour tinted scenes :( the troubleshooting section at the end goes over some options, including starting with a levels layer instead.
✨ selective colour (and skin tone correction)
skin tones are made up of a mixture of yellow and red.
removing yellow (or adding blue or red) to a gif will make the skin-tones too red - and removing red (or adding cyan or yellow) to a gif will make the skin-tones too yellow.
adding blue to this gif with the curves layer took out the yellowy tint, which I wanted - but it also took the yellows out of Kim's skin tone, which I don’t want. so I need to put yellow back into the skin tones specifically - without putting it back into the rest of the gif.
selective colour layers let you select an individual colour and adjust the levels of other colours within that colour. you can change how yellow the green shades are, or how much cyan is in the blues, for example.
I need to add yellow back into the red tones to correct the skin tones on this gif. this is the case for most gifs in my experience - the vast majority of the time, unless a scene is very heavily tinted in another colour, a curves layer will add blue/remove yellow.
in the 'colors' dropdown, select the 'reds' section and drag the 'yellow' slider higher - this will add more yellow into just the red shades within the gif.
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the amount of yellow you need to add back into the reds depends on how much yellow was taken out of the gif initially - I just play around with the slider until it looks right. if you're not sure, it helps to have some neutrally-coloured (not white-washed!) reference photos of the people in your gif to compare to.
here's the result. Kim's skin is a lot less pink toned and much more natural looking:
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✨ hue/saturation
this adjustment layer lets you adjust the hue and saturation of the gif as a whole, and also of each colour individually.
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I don't use the hue or lightness sliders unless I'm trying to do something more complicated with the colouring.
clicking the dropdown menu that says 'master' lets you edit the saturation of each colour individually. this is useful if your gif is still super tinted in one colour.
I thought the yellows on this gif were still slightly too bright, so I switched to the yellow channel and desaturated them slightly. (remember if you do this then you need to go back to selective colour and add more yellow into the red skin tones to balance out the desaturation!)
then I increased the 'master' saturation of all the colours to +5:
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I usually find the right amount of saturation is somewhere between +5 and +12, but it depends on the gif.
‼️if the gif feels undersaturated, but the saturation slider isn't helping/is making the colours worse, try a vibrance layer instead.
done!
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✨ saving and reusing colouring
you can copy and paste adjustment layers between gifs to make your colouring even across each of your gifs for one scene - so if you're making a set of multiple gifs of the same scene, or you think you might want to gif the same scene again in the future, you can save it as a psd so you can reuse the colouring again later.
each gif's colouring will then still need tweaking - different cameras/angles/shots of the same scene can still start out with slightly different colouring.
I recommend uploading the gifs as a draft post on tumblr so you can see what they all look like next to each other and catch any inconsistencies.
✨ another one! (speedrun!)
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HI KEN!
the white point for the curves layer was in the window behind them.
the curves layer removes the muddy yellow tint, but again it makes their skin tones (especially Ken's) very red toned, which is adjusted by the selective colour layer.
3. other adjustment layers
imo many many gifs can be coloured really nicely with just those three adjustment layers, but some need different adjustments.
✨ brightness/contrast
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pretty self explanatory!
I personally usually avoid using the 'brightness' slider because I rarely like the effect - I only tend to use the 'contrast' one. 
the 'auto' button is sometimes useful though, especially if you’re struggling with the curves layer.
✨ levels
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levels alters the white and black points of the gif, like curves - but unlike curves it doesn't also alter other colours.
use the sliders beneath the graph to alter how dark/light the gif is. you can slide the black slider further to the right to make the blacks darker, and the white slider to the left to make the whites lighter.
levels is a good place to start if your curves layer isn't working.
(I'm going to hit the image limit for this post lol so here are some screenshots of a table I made to demonstrate this rather than actual gifs. sorry!)
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on both sides, I dragged the sliders up to where the big jumps are on the graph - this is usually a good place to start!
✨ vibrance
vibrance... makes the colours more vibrant. it's more subtle than saturation.
it's really helpful for gifs that feel grey. sometimes adjusting saturation just makes the greys kind of weirdly tinted, but a vibrance layer can fix that.
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vibrance is much more subtle!
✨ colour balance
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colour balance affects the overall balance of colours within a gif.
it's good for scenes with heavy tints.
I tend to stick to the 'midtones' dropdown, but you can also alter the colour balance within the shadows and highlights if you want.
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✨ channel mixer
I avoided channel mixer for such a long time because it scared me. but it's great for scenes that are very heavily tinted in one colour.
basically, it works with the levels of red, green, and blue within a gif. you select an output colour and then play around with the levels of the colour you selected within each other colour.
kind of the reverse of selective colour?
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so in the 'blue' channel, the levels of blue are at 100%, and the levels of red and green are at 0% - but you can impact how much blue is in the reds and greens and blues.
this tutorial explains it well - but imo the best way to get to grips with channel mixer is just to play around with it a bit (sorry)
(when I made this guide for my friend, I also made a slightly more complicated gif colouring walk-through that included using channel mixer. there isn't space to include it within this post, but if anyone is interested I could always upload it as an 'intermediate' gif colouring tutorial - lmk!)
4. troubleshooting
‼️curves
usually with a bit of fucking about a curves layer works well - but sometimes you can’t find a good white and black point anywhere, and instead your gif turns wacky colours and nothing looks good. this happens more often with very heavily colour tinted scenes :(
for example, with this base gif:
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using many of the brightest points as a white point turn it wacky colours, like this:
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yikes :(
some options for these cases:
try brightening the gif first with the 'auto' button on the curves layer or with a levels layer. having a brighter gif to start with can give you better options for picking a white point.
try finding an alternate, whiter/brighter white point. look for places the light reflects - on this gif, using the light on Porsche's cheekbone works well as the white point. it also helps to find places that would be white if the scene wasn't tinted - the lightest part of a white shirt is often a good place to start, for example.
skip the curves layer, and instead use a levels layer to alter your white/black points, and colour balance or channel mixer to balance the colours.
‼️over/undersaturation
if your gif (especially the skintones) is looking a little washed out or lifeless, it might be undersaturated. boost that saturation - or if that's not working, try a vibrance layer.
oversaturation is often easiest to spot in the mouths and ears of any people in a gif. if the mouths are looking unnaturally, vibrantly red, then you've gone too far with the saturation.
5. fin!
and done! I hope this was coherent helpful to somebody.
if there's anything that I've missed or that doesn't make sense pls feel free to shoot me an ask or a message and I'll do my best to help! I've also collated a bunch of additional reading/resources below.
happy gifmaking 🥰
✨ some links!
photoshop basics by @selenapastel
gifmaking for beginners by @hayaosmiyazaki
gifmaking guide for beginners by @saw-x
dreamy's gif tutorial by @scoupsy-remade (includes instructions on how to blur out burned-on subtitles or annoying video graphics)
beginner's guide to channel mixer by @aubrey-plaza
how to fix orange-washed characters by aubrey-plaza
colour correcting and fixing dark scenes by @kylos
does resampling matter? by usergif
how to put multiple gifs on one canvas by @fictionalheroine
watermarking using actions by @wonwooridul
resource directory by @usergif
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onlyjaeyun · 5 months
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𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒 – 𝟏𝟖
𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍: 𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐲
⤥ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 𝟕.𝟗𝐤
⤥ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐒𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐱 𝐅𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐞 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
⤥ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬!𝐀𝐔
⤥ 𝐜𝐰: 𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐬𝟑𝐱, 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐨𝐧𝐞 (𝟏) 𝐬𝐥𝐮𝐭, 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐥 (𝐟.𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠), 𝐬𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐟!𝐝𝐨𝐦, 𝐩𝐮𝐬𝐬𝐲 𝐝𝐫𝐮𝐧𝐤!𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐧
⤥ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: 𝐀 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐚𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐯𝐞, 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐬. 𝐀 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐧 𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐲'𝐬 𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐤.
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"Sunghoon's gonna kill me", Jay sighs and looks at his reflection in the mirror, his newly dyed dark hair complimenting his sharp features and with the biggest smile on your lips you finish up the side of his taper fade.
"What is he going to do? Hate me for convincing both you and Jaeyun to dye your hair back to black when this is the colour that suits you the best?" You can't help but chuckle at the thought of your least favorite human's reaction to his best friends' new hair colours.
For some reason today feels a lot less mentally challenging than the past few days.
Maybe it's because you spent hours away from your phone and with your favorite person, baking and gossiping over a glass of wine followed by doing her nails and just reminiscing about your time together in Highschool. Tsuki's presence never fails to ease your heart and calm your nerves, no matter how stressed or anxious you are, she always manages to distract you by just being herself.
It's the feeling of home and comfort she's never failed to give you, which you find yourself longing for the most when things get a little bit more difficult than usual.
Tsuki has never judged you, nor has she ever made you feel bad or invalidated in your feelings. Your thoughts and emotions, worries and doubts mean something to her and as she makes you feel cherished and loved, adored and appreciated in ways no man has ever managed to do romantically, you know she'll always be there when your heart needs it the most.
The past eighteen hours were filled with silly jokes, memories, genuine laughter and giggles, the exchange of thoughts and worries as well as absolute silence every now and then.
And as Tsuki started telling you about the few dates she's been on with Heeseung, something you've been suspecting for a while now yet never felt the need to point out because you knew she'd confide in you the moment she feels ready, you couldn't help but feel guilty about keeping so much to yourself, yet the fear of disappointing one of the few people who's always believed in and supported you no matter what is too captivating to even consider. So, with a soft sigh you just listened to her little rambles and giggled along with her when she got a little too excited about her newly found crush and possible soon-to-be-boyfriend.
For a moment you actually found yourself contemplating whether or not you should tell her, only for the heaviness on your chest to make the decision for you.
And as you watch the way she's mindlessly curling her hair, the new make up style you had tried on her, enhancing her beautiful features in the most perfect way possible and you can't believe just how beautiful your best friend is. Fukotomi Tsuki is the type of woman whose beauty and grace is a reflection of her genuinely kind and gentle soul, something she's never failed to inspire you with.
"Hey, Babe I don't mean to rush you but I really need to take a shower because I feel overstimulated so..how long is this going to take?" Jongseong's calm voice pulls you back into reality and with a soft sigh you meet his gaze in the mirror.
"Sorry, I got distracted", you say and reach for the little comb on your make up desk to brush through the thick strands of your best friends frehly cut hair, "all done, big guy."
"Fucking awesome", Jongie mumbles with a huge smile on his face as he gets closer to the mirror and then jumps up on his feet.
The second the young man leaves your apartment, you can't help but throw yourself onto your bed, a row of loud sighs falling past your lips as you crave the taste and effects of alcohol in your system.
"Alright, what's going on?"
The sudden question surpises you and with arched brows you turn your head to look at your best friend, who's just finished her hair and has now turned to face you.
With a soft sigh, you avert your gaze from Tsuki to shut your conscience up, only for your heart to take over and make the decision you've been putting off for as long as possible.
"I fucked Sunghoon", you blurt out and don't even dare to look at her, knowing exactly which specific combination of elotions is grazing her beautiful face as your words make their way into her understanding.
"You're lying", Tsuki chuckles and takes a huge sip from her glads of wine, her fresh set of nails nervously scratching her neck, a habit she's always had and the reason why reading her like an open book has always been so easy for you.
With a sigh of frustration you swallow your tears of anger and self disappointment before finally sitting up and looking at her.
And just as expected you're met with a mixture of disbelief, shock, surprise and genuine confusion.
"You are lying", she giggles again, yet her smile has slowly faded, eyes wide and filled with denial.
"I wish I was", you whisper and tilt your head nack to stop the tears from pricking at the corners of your eyes, since you definitely don't need your mascara to smudge only ten minutes before the beginning of the actual party.
"When?" At this point Tsuki has finally reached a stage of acceptance as she gets up from the little chair, makes her way across the room and right next to you on the bed.
The initial shock and disbelief has now faded and got replaced by genuine concern, something which reminds you just how easily she reads you, too.
"Exactly a month ago, on the night of Seung's birthday", you sigh and feel the knot in your throat coming back at full force, your denial and anger about this particular night finally catching up on you.
The past few weeks you've spent simply trying to forget something has ever happened between you and Sunghoon and no matter how many nights of pleasure you've spent with Fuma or anxious phone calls with Shotaro, this weird feeling of discomfort and shame has never left you.
You have no idea what exactly it is about the fact that you've been intimate with the one man you've hated for as long as you could remember, yet regardless of the reason your body, mind and soul have yet to accept it.
Deep down, in the darkest bits of your heart, you know it's because he hurt you. You know it's because he crushed your soul after you've shown yourself in such a vulnerable state. Subconsciously you're aware that all those nights you've spent crying with a tight chest and heavy heart weren't because of your break up, but because of the things Sunghoon had said to you.
But...you just don't understand why and how his words and actions, his behavior and demeanor have had such an intense imapct on your emotional state. It's not like you care about him in any way, so why has your mind not stopped replaying his exacg words from that night.
The fact he's been quite opena nd honest about wanting you again has definitely not helped your crushed soul and the fear of allowing yourself to get another taste just to satisfy that deep, disgusting hunger in the deepest parts of your mind has consumed you.
After so many conversations about what had happened between the to of you, with the only two people who actually know about it, you've come to the conclusion that maybe you want him to touch you again, but you have yet to figure out why exactly.
You spent the next five minutes catching Tsuki up on what exactly happened, how everything went down and for the first time in weeks, you actually voice out the things Sunghoon had said to you.
Every ounce of enthusiasm and excitement has long disappeared from your best friend's face and instead she's now filled with anger and wrath, disappointment and frustration.
"I'm sorry for not telling you about this earlier", you sigh and start fumbling with the rings on your fingers, your late mother's wedding band firmly placed around one of the digits as it brings you the comfort you've always found in her blurry memory.
"Don't be, babe", Tsuki is quick to reassure you, her voice hentle and calm, the complete opposite to all the dark emotions gleaming in her pretty eyes, "I'm proud of you for talking about it and grateful that you trust me enough to confide in me. I wish we could just ditch the party and have a girls' night."
You nod and reach for her delicate hand, the feeling of her skin underneath your fingertips easing your anxious nerves and with a soft sigh you lift your head to look at her again.
"How about we get drunk now and postpone that girls' night to tomorrow, hm? I really don't want the boys to find out and we both know they'd never let me hear the end of it if I didn't show up."
"Yeah, Seung's been texting me for an hour to hurry up because guests have arrived already", Tsuki replies and gets up, but not walking away before wrapping her arms around your shoulders to pull you into a tight hug, "just please promise me to talk about this in greater detail once you feel ready. This really worries me, baby. I can tell how much it's been effecting you and I can't lie, I knew it wasn't because of Jaemin's stupid ass and this new information changes the whole story."
All you can do is nod yet again, too mentally and physically exhausted to talk as you find comfort in her embrace before the two of you gather your things and finally make your way down the hallway into an apartment you've been skillfully avoiding for the past three months since you've moved.
You've never had a problem with sharing the same close friend circle as Sunghoon, but every now and then you catch yourself wishing they would have just dropped him years ago, knowing every bit of pain and hurt you've been feeling until now could have been avoided if he had only left your life.
You try your best to forget about his existence the way you’ve been doing up until the night of Heesueng’s birthday and every single day afterwards.
It’s not as easy as your brain makes it sound, especially when he’s the first person to meet your gaze as soon as you step foot into his shared apartment with yourbest friend and birthday boy Sim Jaeyun, but for the sake of everyone’s joy and happiness, you decide to just avert your gaze and ignore the burning in the deepest bits of your stomach.
And as you pass him without even granting him another look, Sunghoon finds himself absolutely captivated by your sight. Your outfits have always complimented your beautiful body, but this one felt like an actual death sentence.
The urge to just pull you into his bedroom and finally have his way with you again has slowly become absolutely unbearable and for the first time in his life, his hatred for you is dethroned by something else.
Hunger.
He’s already accepted his weird, twisted fate when it comes to his newfound feelings for you, but his pride and ego have been suffering from this epiphany and after weeks of internal fighting, Sunghoon’s gotten too tired, too exhausted to deny anything anymore.
However, different than he could have ever expected, his desire for you, your body and your touch have also brought along something he hasn’t felt in years: jealousy.
The sight of your university’s golden boy calmly wrapping his arms around your body and whispering something into your ear, even eliciting a genuine chuckle from you leaves the most disgusting feeling on his tongue and the longer he stares at the two of you, the deeper his hatred for you begins to run.
Every time Sunghoon is convinced he can’t physically, mentally and emotionally dislike you even further, you do something with someone right in front of his eyes and his blood starts boiling in ways he’s only ever associated with you.
“Why the fuck are you frowning again?” Jongseong voice makes it through the loud music and the cloud in his brain, finally pulling his attention away from you and Fuma and right back to reality.
“Nothing”, Sunghoon grunts and downs the rest of his cocktail, loving the way the liquid leaves a burning sensation in his throat and finally replaces the weird taste of jealousy coating the muscle of his tongue.
“Why is he in a bad mood again?” Sunoo suddenly appears next to Jongseong, his brows furrowed in confusion as a rosy tint covers the apple of his cheeks, indicating the amount of alcohol in his system.
Sunghonn can’t help but let out a chuckle at the sight of his friends and with a soft sigh, he just shrugs and throws his cup onto the table, knowing there’s really no point in letting these weird emotions get to him, no matter how good you look.
The following three hours are filled with loud music, laughter and a couple of drinking games, which basically ended up into a competition between the hockey and basketball team.
For some reason, you don’t feel agitated or annoyed, but are actually enjoying yourself, despite the fact that you’ve been in such close proximity with Park Sunghoon for so long.
As yourboys have seemed to make it their mission to keep you distracted and very well entertained, you can’t find much time to talk to Fuma or basically anyone else besides your friends, but you wouldn’t want it any other way.
It’s not like he’s your boyfriend and even if the two of you get along well and you’d actually consider him your friend, you’re not really into smalltalk and are quite keen on keeping whatever’s going on between the two of you as lowkey as possible, simply because you don’t want anyone to stick their nose into your business.
The last thing you need is to deal with stupid rumors and random people slutshaming you for being sexually active.
To your luck, Fuma’s been just as casual about the whole situation, something you’re more than just grateful for because no matter how understanding and chill your friends and brothers might be, you know exactly how quickly things can get awkward and after so much fun you’d rather not be the one to sour the mood.
As the night goes on, you notice the way Sunghoon slowly becomes less careful and secretive about his attention, which has remained solely on you for the past three hours. You’re physically unable to deny just how much it pushes your ego, yet every time you catch his gaze roaming your body and basically devouring you alive, you can’t help but hate yourself a little more for enjoying it.
Maybe it’s the fact that he’s turned down every single girl who’s come up to him, shooting him soft glances and the sweetest smiles as Sunghoon’s eyes subconsciously found your each and every single time you came into his field of vision.
Neither one of you has said a single thing and whenever this particular realisation hits you, you remember the things he had whispered into your ear after making you fall apart on his tongue.
“If you told me it took nothing but a good tongue-fuck to keep that big mouth of yours shut I would have done this years ago.”
You hate your brain for replaying those exact words so many times, yet at this point you’re more than just ready to blame it on the alcohol in your blood, casually ignoring the fact that you’re barely tipsy, since you haven’t had the time to drink as much as your tolerance allowed you to.
However, the entirety of your friendgroup has made sure to take over the drinking part for you, as both sets of triplets have definitely gone way over their actual limits, but since there’s no way you could ever be the mean big sister at times like these, you have decided to just sit back and watch the most hilarious scenes unfold right in front of you.
By the time Sunoo had Jongseong have already passed out in each other’s arms, most of the guests have already left, leaving it to be Jaeyun’s closest people only and even though you would have loved to take Fuma up on his offer for a quick round at your place, you’re glad you’ve decided to say your farewell and focus on a good time with your favorite people.
“Are you sure, pretty girl?”, the tall captain smiles and wraps his big hand around your throat, his eyes quickly roaming your surroundings to make sure no one catches a glimpse of his lips finding yours and with a soft hum, you nod yet again.
“Can’t lie”, Fuma sighs and pulls you closer against his strong chest, “I would have loved to fuck you into oblivion tonight because fuck, do you look good.”
It doesn’t take much more than his fingers digging into the soft flesh of your waist for all the memories of a very specific person to find their way back into your head.
You hate how you have to push yourself to look into Fuma’s face at all times, because whenever your eyes fall shut, you catch yourself imaging the one person you promised yourself to never think of again and despite the annoyance and frustration, a wave of guilt usually follows those thoughts and before you can actually enjoy yourself, you’re back to zero.
“Hm, how about this”, you say and start caressing his exposed arms, knowing one of your boys could come around the corner at any given times, yet not sober enough to actually care for once, “I tug all these big guys into bed and make sure they’re taken care of safe and then head over to your place?”
Fuma’s plump lips stretch into a satisfied smile before he lands a gentle spank on the back of your naked thigh, “sounds perfect, angel girl. I’ll give you a call once I’m home and if you’re still up for it, I’ll order you an uber.”
After another rather sloppy kiss, you close the door and let out a soft sigh as the tension finally leaves your body and you feel a wave of exhaustion wash over you.
You’ve never been with someone as attentive and caring as Fuma, despite the fact your relationship is solely physical, he’s made sure to always make you feel desired and taken care of, which is exactly why the guilt feels suffocating whenever you’re around him for too long.
It’s not like you want to think about Sunghoon as much as you do, especially not when you’re being intimate with someone so lovely and kind like Fuma, but your body has made it quite clear to you and no matter how hard you try to deny it, deep down you know there’s only one guy you think about when you’re pushing yourself over the edge.
And as you pass the living room to go to the bathroom in hopes of getting rid of some of the tension in your limbs, you’re instead met with a strong chest and before your brain can even process what’s going on, the familiar scent of Sunghoon’s cologne has long made his presence known.
With your brows furrowed in annoyance, you don’t even bother to lift your head and look up at him, definitely not in the mood to let him ruin the rest of your night when the party went as smoothly as it did, despite his presence.
However, Sunghoon has absolutely no intention of letting you go anywhere anytime soon.
He has absolutely no fucking clue, why he decided to cut your way off or why he forced himself to watch that fucking bastard of a captain touch and kiss what he’s been craving for so long, but after being in denial for as long as he has, Hoon’s come to the conclusion that you’ve driven him into complete insanity.
There’s no logical explanation for his behavior, not even for his train of thoughts or any of the decisions he’s made these past four weeks, so why would there be a point in denying anything anymore?
He wants whatever you’re willing to give him, no matter how desperate he looks in your eyes. Sunghoon doesn’t give a fuck about what you think or feel, so why would he care about your opinion on him? So, what if you think he’s pathetic for wanting to sleep with you again? He’s never been ashamed for wanting what and who he wants and he won’t start just because it’s you, of all people, whom he wants.
“What the fuck do you want?” Just as usual you’re not hesitant to spit your venom, but after so many years, Sunghoon has become immune. Nothing you say fazes him, no matter how hard you try and how badly you want to hurt him, he took that ability away from you the day you had made your decision to betray and humiliate him. He’d never give you the chance to break his soul again, not when you’re the reason he has never allowed anyone close to his heat again.
“It’s so amusing to me how much you’re trying to make things work with that captain”, Sunghoon says and runs a hand through his light hair, his dark eyes never once shifting away from your face, “especially when we both know he won’t ever give you exactly what you need.”
“Oh, and you will? Stop wasting my fucking time, you cunt”, you scoff and roll your eyes, a sight Sunghoon’s been daydreaming about for way too long and with all of your friends completely passed out, he’s determined to grab the chance by its tail and make the best of it.
Neither one of you acknowledges it, not caring enough to give it any thought or weight, yet regardless of the deep hatred you feel, you do know each other good enough and that’s why Sunghoon is more than just sure how aware you are of the realness behind his words.
“Alright”, he suddenly says, thick brows furrowed as he wraps his big hand around your arm and pushes you through the doorstep and right into the center of his own room, leaving you completely shocked, yet not an ounce of fear or panic has entered your body.
Maybe it’s because subconsciously you know he’d never physically hurt you. Not because he somehow cares about you, but because Park Sunghoon would never get physical with someone who doesn’t have the power to fight back.
“You have no reason to lie to me, so be fucking honest”, he presses through gritted teeth, the sight of his anger stricken features sending jolts of arousal through body in just the way you’ve been craving it.
“I don’t owe you shit”, you throw right into his face, ready to storm out again just because you’re not as sure and confident about your own residence anymore as you were just a few minutes ago, “you’re batshit crazy, if you really think I’m gonna let you fuck me again.”
Sunghoon can’t help but smile sheepishly in response to your meek attempt to defeat your own desires. Everything about your behavior and body language gives away just how much you want him, it doesn’t matter if your words claim the opposite.
The way your chest is rapidly rising and falling, your balled fists, the fact you’ve been pressing your thighs together ever since you bumped into his chest and most importantly: your eyes.
A few weeks ago, Hoon would have knocked himself out for ever thinking thoughts like these, but since he’s gotten his first taste of you, he’s realised just how expressive your eyes are. However, he intentionally chooses to ignore the fact this particular realisation had him right in the guts when he watched the pain fill your eyes.
He knows to other people you have a so called “resting bitch face” but everyone who’s ever spend more than a day around you knows just how much of the talking your eyes do for you.
And just as usual, Sunghoon doesn’t need you to say anything because the longing and desire gleaming in the gentle colour surrounding your eyes is what gives him the answers he’s been waiting for all this time.
“Just this once”, Sunghoon sighs and runs both of his hands through his hair, pulling at the roots as he feels the frustration bubbling up in his throat in response to your stubbornness.
“Be fucking honest with me just this once”, you didn’t even realise just how close he’s gotten to you, his body mere inches away from you and before you can actually process it, your back hits the wall, leaving you no choice but to look at him, “has he made you cum? I need to know this, Y/N.”
The sound of your name falling from his lips feels foreign and unfamiliar. You can’t actually remember the last time you had heard him say it, even when talking to mutual friends or coworkers had he refused to take it into his mouth.
And even if you can’t make sense of it, you know that’s the exact reason for your body’s response to his question in form of a simple shake of your head.
“I fucking knew it”, he hisses and plants his hands on both sides of your face as he throws his head back with a loud groan, “I fucking knew I wasn’t the only one going through this fucking hell.”
The cloud of arousal fogging up the rational parts of your brain as well as the sweet scent of his cologne make it quite difficult for you to focus, yet the second you manage to process what he had said, your lips part in shock.
“What – does that mean?”
Sunghoon pulls away from you with a loud scoff and before he gets the chance to turn away, you reach for his face and force him to look into your eyes.
There’s no way you’re going to give him the privilege of looking away again, not when you had promised yourself to never, ever get to this point again. This is the least you owe yourself. Not him or anyone else, but your crushed soul.
“What the fuck does that mean, Sunghoon?”, this time you’re the one to use his name, something you’ve always hated doing, yet subconsciously hoping it’ll have the same effect on him as it had on you.
“Do you really think I want to want you this badly? Do you really fucking think I’m being lie this because I want a quick fuck?”, his voice is cold and distant, something you’re used to and weirdly makes you feel at ease as the arousal has slowly taken over the last bits of your body.
“No matter what I watched, no matter who I fucked or how hard I’ve tried to forget about how good ou felt, I just couldn’t. Not if I wasn’t thinking about you.”
His confession leaves you absolutely speechless.
Despite the wide range in your vocabulary of two languages, you find yourself struggling to come with one to use in response to what he had just admitted and for the first time in exactly a month you don’t actually feel bad for wanting him the way you do.
“Every time the boys talked about you and that fucking captain I almost lost my mind because how the fuck did you just go and let some random wannabe touch you, when I’m right fucking here”, Sunghoon grunts and pushes his body back against yours, the feeling of your soft tits against his strong chest overwhelmingly arousing to the point of it being genuinely embarrassing, but again – he’s lost his mind and he knows it.
“Do you need me to remind you which one of us wanted to act like this never happened, you fucking coward?”, you spit back once the anger mixes into your arousal,your grip around his face tightening, only for Sunghoon to groan in response to the physical pain of your nails digging into his soft skin.
“I fucking know”, he sighs and subconsciously starts humping your bare thigh, the feeling of his hard cock against your skin sending shivers down your spine in the best way possible.
“How the fuck was I supposed to know or even imagine that you, of all people on this god damn earth, would do this to my body?”
“S-Sunghoon”, you whisper as he buries his face in your neck, his big hands finding home on the back of your thighs before he pulls your legs apart to give himself access to your clothed cunt.
You coudn’t have held back the guttural moan following the feeling of his bulge pressing against your sensitive clit even if you had tried to, the arousal too consuming to suppress.
It doesn’t take much for Sunghoon to lose himself in the sweet feeling of your warm pussy firmly pressed against his clothed cock, he’s been thinking and daydreaming about you for too long and although he had accepted his current mental state, he has now decided to blame it on the little bit of alcohol rushing through his veins alongside the dizzying arousal.
“Come on, snowflake”, he grunts and pulls the skins of your neck in between his lips, making sure to leave a huge mark as thoughts of that fucker touching what so obviously was destined for him and him only, “stop denying it. You want me as much as I want you.”
Waves of pleasure and anger, frustration and despair wash over you in a way you’ve never experienced before, but just as usual there’s one particular feeling taking over when it comes to Park Sunghoon.
“I fucking hate you”, you spit and push your hand into his hair, forcefully pulling his face away from your neck, only to be met with the sight of Sunghoon’s hooded, hunger filled gaze.
“Don’t worry”, he suddenly grunts and moves his hand in between your bodies to fumble with the buckle of his belt, “I’m not doing this because I’m so fucking fond of you all of a sudden but fuck, I need to fuck you.”
You let out a soft whimper when his knuckles hit your sensitive clit and with a frustrated sigh you throw your head back because it’s in this particular moment you realise you’re going to let him fuck you again – because you genuinely want him to.
“There we go”, Sunghoon chuckles and wraps his big, ring clad hand around your throat to tilt your head forward and rub his thumb over your bottom lip, “there’s no point in fighting what your body needs, Baby. This isn’t as deep as we’re making it to be. I want to fuck you and you want to fuck me, that’s it. There’s nothing else to this, right, snowflake?”
The use of that stupid nickname sends jolts of anger right in between your legs and without giving it another thought, you part your lips and bite down on the tip of his thumb, only for Sunghoon to pull away with a loud hiss – and a chuckle.
“Bark and bite? What’s wrong, snowflake? Still so mad about that stupid nickname? Silly, silly little ice queen”, he whispers right against your lips, the feeling of his hot breath hitting your heated skin in combination with his hand around your throat leaves you lighthearted, you can’t even get yourself to respond.
“Look at you”, he muses and reaches for the back of your little top, quickly pulling the zipper down and pushing it down to expose your chest to his hungry eyes, “f-fuck, they’re pierced?”
“Who’s the silly one now, you fucking bastard”, you spit and pull your bottom lip between your teeth to hold back your moans as the feeling of his wet tongue circling your sensitive nipple pushes you even deeper into the haze of your pleasure.
At this point you’ve made a mess of your precious lace panties, the ones you had put on with Fuma on your mind, yet can’t actually get yourself to care.
“Mhm”, Sughoon hums and wraps his plump lips around the little nub, his tongue flicking over the tip and reminding you of how that particular motion had managed to make you cum all over his face in actual record time, something you’d never actually mention around him.
“So responsive”, he chuckles, “you’re about to choke on that little ‘I hate you’, snowflake. How does it feel?”
“Shut the fuck up”, you press through gritted teeth, only for your body to betray you as your fingers wrap themselves around his wrist to push his hand down your chest in hopes of him getting what you’re asking for.
“Keep going”, Sunghoon replies casually and pulls away to get rid of the stupid piece of fabric you really dared to call an outfit, leaving you in nothing but your drenched panties.
Usually you’d feel too exposed, too out in the open, insecure and even self conscious, but as you watch the way Sunghoon shamelessly devours you with his eyes only, you can’t stop your ego from actually reaching the moon.
“I like hearing how much you hate me because this sweet little pussy surely doesn’t feel the same”, he whispers into your ear as he pushes his hand into your panties, not even hesitating to push one of his long fingers into your needy cunt.
“Fuck, just as tight and warm as I remember”, his voice suddenly breaks at the of his sentence when you clench around the single digit, making the usually so cocky coach choke on his words.
“Yeah, don’t smile like that, snowflake, you’ve got me good. I won’t deny it anymore”, Sunghoon sounds just as arrogant as usual, but the way he looks at you with so much desire and want shimmering in the usually so cold brown of his eyes doesn’t match the tone of his voice.
All of a sudden you realise just how long you’ve been looking at him and before anything but pleasure can take over your foggy brain, you decide to reach in between your bodies and stroke his cock through the thin layer of his boxer briefs.
“Oh, fuck”, Sunghoon suddenly moans and quickly buries his face in your chest, knowing he won’t be bale to hold himself back any longer, but too proud to show even more of his hunger for you and your touch.
He wants you to know how much he craves your body because it’s the only way for him to get what he wants, but his pride would never allow him to let you see too much.
“Do you have condoms? Please, tell me you do”, you swallow your moans and try to focus on the way he’s gently humping his finger into your tight hole, the need to finally feel full and actually cum without having to imagine anything overwhelming your senses.
“I wanna eat your pussy first”, Sunghoon blurts out and looks at you with flushed cheeks and swollen lips, the sight so delicious, you hate him for it.
“Yeah?” You reply and push your lips into a faux pout, nodding along when he confirms your question, only for you to let out a high pitched chuckle.
“You’re so desperate, pretty face, what happened to that cocky attitude? Is that all it takes? Good pussy shuts you the fuck up, is that the truth?”
It takes Sunghoon a whole minute to realise that you’re mocking him and as soon as he does, he snaps back to reality and rolls his eyes, still not caring enough.
“Answer me”, you demand and tighten your grip around his cock,your other hand pulling his out of your panties, “cat got your tongue, pretty face? What’s wrong?”
Your new nickname for him sends his brain into overdrive, and as if the sound of your sweet voice drenched in mockery wasn’t enough, you force Sunghoon to look right into your eyes.
“Yes, fuck”, he grunts and shamelessly thrusts his cock into your fist, his eyes rolling into the back of his head before he quickly pushes his fingers into his mouth, lapping up every drop of your sweet cunt like a starved man.
“There we go”, you imitate his reaction with a devilish grin on your face, “but not tonight, pretty face. I need you to be good and fuck me before someone notices that we’ve been gone.”
“Fucking b–”, however, you’re quick to cut him off, knowing you won’t let him disrespect you, no matter how badly you want him.
“Nuh uh”, you say and grab his face again, “stop fucking with my patience and do what you’ve been begging for.”
Sunghoon is too close to even think about talking back and he hates you, the universe, fate and whatever is responsible for his body’s reactions to your touch for putting him into this situation.
“Fine. Turn around.”
As you start shaking your head in response to his demand, Sunghoon can’t help but furrow his brows in confusion.
“Man the fuck up and look at me when you fuck me”, you hiss and push your panties down your thighs, a pain you’ve found comfort in suddenly filling your chest, pulling you away from the pleasure you’ve been deprived from for way too long.
Why does your brain have to work this way? Why can’t you just enjoy the pleasure? Why does this always have to be some kind of mental and emotional torture?
“Won’t have to tell me twice, snowflake”, Sunghoon simply replies and pull away from your body before he gets rid of his dark jeans and boxer briefs, finally revealing the cock you’ve been daydreaming in denial for so long, “get on the bed, spread those legs for me. I’m gonna fuck that attitude out of your little pussy.”
His words, yet again, leave you completely stunned but your body reacts way quicker than your mind as you find yourself approaching his bed and doing as you’re told without a verbal response.
For some reason the following few minutes are filled with nothing, not a single word, but heavy breathing and the suffocating tension of your pleasure and arousal lingering in the air.
You attentively watch the way Sunghoon rips open the condom wrapper before he gives himself a few good strokes and then rolls it over his annoyingly pretty cock.
Not nice in your life have you used the word ‘pretty’ to describe male genitalia but there’s no point in denying just how well it fits when it comes to Park Sunghoon.
It’s thick and long, slightly curved at the tip, veiny just like his arms and just a few shades darker than the rest of his body, the tip thick and dripping in precum. There’s absolutely no point in him having such a beautiful face and cock, absolutely none.
“I’ll send you a picture when you’re home, that’ll last longer”, Sunghoon deadpans and if it wasn’t or the actual pain you’re currently in from how much your cunt’s been clenching around nothing, you would have given him a piece of your mind.
But Sunghoon doesn’t seem to care about your lack of a sassy response as he pushes yur legs further apart and reveals your dripping cunt to his needy eyes. He wants to curse you out for taking away getting another taste but he knows this won’t be the last time, so without giving himself enough time to get more frustrated, he simply starts rubbing the length of his wrapped cock over your slick folds.
“Oh, fuck”, a row of deep moans falls past his lips and before he can realise what his body is doing he catches himself burying his face in your neck for the nth time already, “I’m going to cover your mouth, so tap my arm if you can’t breathe. We don’t want anyone to hear how good I’m fucking this sweet pussy, right, snowflake?”
“Cocky bastard”, is the only thing you say as you nod and quickly choke on one of your high pitched moans when Sunghoon suddenly pushes the tip of his cock into your tight cunt.
“Oh, my fucking God”, you breathe, your nails digging into his broad back as your eyes roll into the back of your head, “more, please. I need more.”
“Give me a fucking minute”, Sunghoon groans, his eyes firmly shut in hopes of stopping himself from cumming too fast because of how good you look with only his tip inside of you, “f-fuck, snowflake…”
For the first time in what feels like ever, the nickname isn’t drenched in derogatory or mockery, it’s nothing but raw pleasure and you can’t deny how good it actually sounds, especially coming from Sunghoon whose voice has dropped a whole octave within just a few seconds.
You find mental satisfaction in the fact that this is effecting him just as much as you.
“Tell me if it’s too much”, he whispers against your lips, his nose nudging yours and for a moment you actually reciprocate his motion, only to turn your head to the side once you realise.
To your luck, Sunghoon doesn’t give it too much thought and once you node, he slowly starts pushing the entirety of his length into your sensitive cunt. The stretch leaves you lightheaded, your moans and whimpers muffled by his hand, leaving his own noises to be the only thing to fill the silence of his room.
It doesn’t take much for him to bottom out, the wetness of your cunt enough lubrication to have you focus on the sweet feeling of being filled just how you’ve been craving it.
Sunghoon gives you a few moments to adjust to his impressive size, his head thrown back as he avoids your gaze because he knows he’s going to cum on the spot if he looks into your stupidly expressive eyes for too long.
To say that your former ice skating partner knows exactly how to use his cock would be an understatement. Park Sunghoon definitely has a reason to be as confident about his skills as he is because that God damn fucker really knows how to fuck.
His thrusts are deep and firm, not too fast or too hard for it to hurt, yet still precise enough to hit just the right spots and with every single movement of his hips, you feel the tip of his cock graze the entrance to your womb in a way you’ve only ever experienced with him.
Moans, profanities, high pitched whimpers, the sound of skin meeting skin and the wetness of your cunt meet in the heavy air of the room, each noise pushing the both of you deeper into a sweet cloud of pleasure and you can’t believe how easy it is for your body to respond to his touches.
“F-fuck”, he suddenly grunts and pushes his hand in between your bodies his thumb easily finding your clit and applying just the right amount of pleasure, “I can feel how close you are. Come on now, Baby, show me how much you hate me. Cum all over my cock like the needy little slut you are.”
Maybe it’s the tiniest bits of gentleness wavering in his usually so cold voice, yet you feel yourself getting closer with each and every word falling past his bit swollen lips.
“I can’t hold back any longer, snowflake”, Sunghoon warns and picks up the pace of his thrusts as well as his thumb on your clit, drawing firm circles into the hardened nub and pushing you closer and closer to your sweet relief.
And as the first wave of your orgasm comes crashing down on you, you let out row of loud moans of his name, only for Sunghoon to suddenly pull his hand away and push his lips against yours, passionately swallowing every single one of your noises.
The moment his tongue grazes over yours, the coil in your lower stomach finally snaps, setting your whole body on fire as you start drowning in the sweet taste of your enemy and the feeling of actual relief.
It doesn’t take Sunghoon much to follow you, his deep grunts sending vibrations right down your throat as he cums inside the condom in three thick spurts.
Just like last time there’s nothing but heavy breathing filling the silence but unlike then, you actually don’t feel disgusting or used.
Neither one of you even gets the chance to overthink the kiss or anything you’ve just said as a sudden noise from the other side of the door leaves you both in shock.
“Fuck”, you whisper and take a deep breath, only for Sunghoon to stop you.
“It’s okay”, he says way too calm and somehow sounding confused, “I’ll take care of them. Let me get you a towel and you can use my bathroom if you need to. DOes anything hurt?”
For the nth time tonight, you’re shocked by his words.
You never expected him to provide you with any sort of empathy or care, not after he had managed to shatter your soul with his coldness the last time.
“Thanks”, you whisper and hate how yet again, tears start pricking at the corners of your eyes.
"Take your time. They’re all wasted, even Tsuki. I’ll make sure to tug the triplets to bed and send both Jay and Seung home. Should I let Tsuki sleep over?”
Sunghoon doesn’t look at you as he pulls his now soft cock out of your sensitive cunt, the sight so pretty, he can’t help but wish to imprint it into his memories forever.
What the fuck is he thinking?
Yeah, he’s definitely lost his mind.
“I’ll take care of her, thanks”, you reply calmly and sit up, only to watch Sunghoon walk over to the other side of his room and carefully collect your clothes from the floor.
“Don’t read anything into this but you’re heading home anyway and nobody gives a fuck so just – wear one of my shirts”, he says and pulls one of his black shirts out of a random drawer, carefully handing it all to you before he puts on a pair of sweats, yet doesn’t bother with a shirt himself.
And as you watch Sunghoon run a hand through his hair and wipe away the remains of your lipstick on his lips, you can’t help but wonder if what you’ve just done really is as bad as your brain makes it to be or if maybe this might become way more beneficial to you than you could have ever expected.
Either way, you know this wasn’t the last time and no matter how badly you want to hate the actual act of it, you simply can’t.
And that’s okay.
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← 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 — 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 — 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 →
(A/N: and there she is! thank you guys so so so much for all tve love, patience and support. i truly appreciate you all and genuinely hope you enjoyed this one. it’s not as kinky as the first time but hey they kissed!!! and hoonie was a decent human for once lets goo!! feedback and reblogs are always appreciated babies!)
TAGLIST: @soonigiri @en-happiness @lhsvibez @dammit-jjk @heerinnie @primroselover @jungwon-xo @szkstay @lostwonderwall @hoonieluv @certifiedmoa @doodlelibrary @ikeuizm @kpoprhia @sleeping-demons @jongszn @imtoanonymousforyou @lalalovejay @ineedsomezzz @xrr-s4sha @ariadores @viagumi @electrobutterfly @mimikittysblog @blurryriki @heelcvr @wonkifangirl @joonzseoulmate @kwiwin @hoondiors @seuomo @zerasari @love-you-twice @aloverga @marz-mars @velvtcherie @niniissus @abrazosolorcereza @ddazed-lhs @acphengene @skz-streamer @kshoshi @tya0 @yizhoutv @jebetwo @myheelody @seokgyuu @blockbusterhee @l0vee-l3tters @luvkpopp
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valsdelulucorner · 1 month
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Soft Beelzebub headcanons 🥺
Soft beel head cannons!
Beel is a absolute unit, he is made up of pure muscle and has the height to see over everyone's at concerts. Alot of people are intimidated by his build and his insatiable hungry but you? You know how much of a sweetheart he is and how much he actually cares about people. He has a endless stomach but a big heart
He loves holding your hand, he likes to compare the size of your hand in his. Normally your hands are smaller then his, he likes how his hand fits nicely around yours, its easier to run his thumb over your knuckles this way. If you have the same hand size as him, he likes how nicely your hand fits with his, like a puzzle piece perfectly fitting together
Ok, this might be abit controversial but I hate how people in the fandom treat beel like he just popped out of the womb, he's been around for thousands of years and he isn't dumb. He knows what periods are, he knows what sex is, how knows how to and has killed people, he isnt stupid
That being said, this man is a absolute sweetheart when your on your period (if you have them of course). Your cramps are getting to painful for you to handle? He will ask Lucifer or solomon what medicine is best for human cramps and try and get them for you, bringing them up to your room with a hot water bottle and some of your favourite devildom treats. He doesn't like seeing you in pain so he tries to help in anyway he can, he will even hold you in his arms while he makes sure a hot water bottle is held against your lower back. He cant relate to your pain but he will definitely try and help you through them.
This man is a major cuddler, Belphie rubbed off on him. After a long day of school, working out, and trying to satiate his never ending hunger, he likes to cuddle you. His favourite way to hold you is when your head is on his chest of hidden in the crook of his neck, his arms wrapped around you as you both lay on your sides, facing eachother while his hands gently trace lines into your back. But he also likes to get held. He loves it when you lay on your back and he lays his head on your chest, your hands tangled in his hair while his arms wrap around you protectively
Food dates and picnic dates are big for him, weather it in a fancy restaurant or a Mcdonalds parking lot he will be happy along as its with you, The amount of times you've gone to a place and just heard the chef behind the line either cry or scream is quite shocking, beel does order basically 5 of each item on the menu. If your out on a town walk and pass by a new cafe or a new sweets shop, you bet your ass that you guys are stopping by and trying everything. He always makes sure you get what you want before he digs in though, making sure he try a bit of everything and get what you want before he goes to town
He takes you on flights in his demon form, he carries you bridal style before taking you on a nice flight over the beautiful castle. he will use this excuse to get some one on one time with you and boy does he love it, how you hold onto his shoulders and how your eyes sparkle with wonder and excitement as he flies you over the colourful lights of the devildom night. He loves to admire your face, he doesn't feel so hungry when he's around you, the hole in his stomach doesn't feel as big with you
Beel is a man of few words so his actions speak more. If your hungry and crave something, he will get a few portions of it and make it into a nice little food date. Your feeling sick at RAD and you have a really terrible headache, he will bring you some medicine and take you home. He will take amazing care of you but he will also expect you to treat him amazingly aswell. If he gets sick and has a terrible headache, he will want you to bring him meds and comfort him. If he's having trouble and struggling with schoolwork, he would appreciate it if you would help him even if you don't know what your doing either
Sweetheart will call you 'Your nickname' 'Sweetie' 'Sugar' 'Love'
This man loves every body type, non of them seem bad to him. Your chubby? Its just more of him to love and cuddle, he loves soft thinks. Your a normal weight? He loves the way you fit nicely in your arms. Your underweight? He loves the way he can easily carry you in his arms, but he does like to make sure to back you little snacks. You have scars, cellulite, any body marks? He finds them fascinating and loves to gently trace them with your fingers. If your not into touch, hes fine with just admiring them. Missing a limb and use a prosthetic? Stuff like that isn't really that common down in devildom so hes really eager to learn about how to help when needed, he doesn't see you any less of a person. White, black, tan, reflectingly pale, whatever colour you are, he will love you if you treat him and his family greatly
My man loves to cook with you and work out with you, he loves when you show him some of your human world recipes while he shows you some Devildom recipes. He loves it when you bake for him, if you make him his favourite flavour of cake, he will deeply appreciate you. If you dont work out, he will ask permission to use you as a weight. He will either have you sit on his back while he does push ups or he will bench press you and comment on how your weigh barley anything to him.
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Sorry if these weren't exactly what you expected, i tried my best to do justice for beel. I enjoyed them so i hope you did too!
Who should i do next?
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malusokay · 1 year
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How to be like Song Ji-a
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Hey babes! I’m so excited to start my little “it-girls series”, of course, starting with no other than my favourite girly, Song Ji-a. She has it all: beauty, style, and confidence. In this post, I’ll show you how to embody her energy, break down the key elements of her style, summarise some of her best advice, and give you all the details on how to be a bit more like her. <3
Ji-a’s energy:
Confidence is key: Ji-a exudes confidence no matter what she’s wearing or doing. Take some inspo from her and start by showing yourself some extra self-love to build your confidence! :)
Be true to yourself: Ji-a never tries to fit into someone else’s mould, and neither should you! Embrace your unique style and show off your personality through your beauty and fashion choices.
Take care of your body: Ji-a is all about that healthy lifestyle, so hit the gym, try a new workout, and fuel your body with nutritious food to boost your energy and confidence. You can also motivate yourself by buying cute matching workout sets!! <3
Stay on-trend: Ji-a’s always ahead of the fashion curve, and we’re here for it. Keep an eye out for the latest fashion and beauty trends, and don’t be afraid to experiment with different looks to find your signature style. <3
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Ji-a’s style:
Simple but chic outfits: Ji-a rocks effortless, minimalist looks with a twist. Get inspired by her style and try adding a pop of your interests to your outfit with bold accessories or unique cuts.
Flawless makeup: Ji-a’s makeup is seriously on point, and yours can be too! Play around with colours, shimmery glitter, and dramatic lips to add some extra charm to your look! :)
Skincare is key: Ji-a swears by her skincare routine to achieve that radiant complexion. So, start taking care of your skin and try out some new hydrating products to get that glow.
Cute Hairstyles: Try out some playful and cute hairstyles or accessorise with some fun hair clips. Don’t forget about your hair care!!
Details, details, details: Ji-a pays attention to every little detail, from her nails to her jewellery. Add some extra touches to your outfit with statement jewellery or cute nail art!! <3
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Elevate your lifestyle:
Self-care is everything: Ji-a emphasises the importance of self-care, so take some time for yourself to unwind and recharge with some yoga, journaling, or a good book!
Stay positive: Positive vibes only! Surround yourself with people who uplift you, practice positive self-talk, and write down daily affirmations to keep that positive mindset. :)
Follow your passions: Ji-a is all about chasing her dreams, and you should be too! Pursue your hobbies or dream career, and don’t be afraid to take risks.
Be confident: Ji-a is all about owning your unique qualities and quirks, so let your true self shine and don’t be afraid to stand out from the crowd.
Be kind: Ji-a is known for her kind and generous personality, so spread some love and kindness wherever you go.
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How to channel your inner Ji-a:
Embrace minimalism: Ji-a’s style is all about simplicity, so try decluttering your space and simplifying your wardrobe to achieve that clean, chic look.
Not everyone will like you, and that's okay: Even Ji-a has had to deal with haters and jealous people in the past (the whole fake designer thing lol...), yet she stays confident and continuously does her thing! You can do that too!! <3
Try out some K-beauty: Being Korean, many of her favourite beauty brands and products are from Korean brands. Experiment with some K-Beauty products to get that glowing complexion! :)
Be yourself: Above all, Ji-a is known for being authentic; whether she’s on camera or in public, she seems to radiate a sense of self-assurance, which spreads confidence and inspiration to others! Stop worrying about what others might think, you're beautiful <3
As always, please feel free to share your own suggestions in the comments and let me know who you want me to write about next! <3
✩‧₊*:・love ya ・:*₊‧✩
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storiesofsvu · 28 days
Text
Decadent Desires Ch 6
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Emily Prentiss x reader warnings: language, mentions of alcohol, sexually charged conversations, teasing/banter. Smut, sex toys, minor bondage, spanking. A guest star of Anthony DiNozzo! I didn't really want to bring in a whole THIRD fandom into this but it ended up working out really nicely and I can play around with it in future chapters too! It feels like it's been ages since I've updated this so clearly the last week was a long one lol. Remember how I said I wanted to be a chapter ahead from now on with my series? Yeah that quickly did not happen. LOL. I'm gonna try to keep up with it, and I promise y'all won't wait longer than a week between chapters, I just need to hunker down and write!
Working for Heather meant that you worked insane hours that could change at the drop of a hat, but it also meant that you could essentially make your own schedule whenever you wanted. You could do most of your job from home or a hotel, as long as you had Wi-Fi you were in the clear, you spent a lot of your time gallivanting around D.C to finish whatever tasks you needed to. Shuffling your schedule around constantly meant that you were more than given the liberty to a Thursday afternoon off and that is exactly why you were meandering down Wisconsin Avenue with Tony in tow. Some of your friends questioned why you always went shopping with him, but the truth was he knew style, understood expensive taste, always told the truth if something looked bad and the entire experience was more efficient. If you went out with your girlfriends on a shopping spree you got dragged into twelve stores you needed nothing from and had to wait while they tried on countless amounts of outfits. With Tony the most that would happen would you’d have some extra browsing time at L. Priori because he got distracted by the watches.
“You got some big White House party coming up or something?” He asked, taking a sip of the coffee you’d bought him earlier.
“Huh?” You glanced over your shoulder as you picked up the small bag, “no.”
“We’ve done jewels, we’ve done shoes,” he pushed the door open for you, holding it while you crossed through the entry way and back out onto the street, “you dropped off three dresses for alterations and looked through the catalogue of what’s coming in…”
“I just want to revamp my closet a little bit, make sure I’m prepared for summer, you know how many extra garden parties I end up at.”
“And your boss is okay with that amount of cleavage?” He asked with a smirk and you rolled your eyes, “I think you’re bullshitting me.”
“I got a little carried away doing spring cleaning and tossed half my closet.” You bluffed, “I work so much I forgot I actually wore the other shit and now need to replace it.” Veering off to the side your hand tugged open the door to Jaryam and Tony followed you inside.
“When’s your next date?” He asked with a grin.
“I never said anything about a date.”
“Then why did you just drag me into a lingerie store?”
“Oh please,” you scoffed, “I didn’t drag you anywhere, you love this shit. I just want some new pieces; you’ve got the right eye for colour and the masculine fetishistic imagination to tell me which ones I’ll look the best in.”
He chuckled darkly, not bothering to disagree with you as you made your way further into the shop, he was a pace behind you, fiddling with a price tag when he scoffed and you turned back to him with a raised brow, “I’ve heard you complain about the prices in Victoria’s Secret and that’s got nothing on this, a thong for a hundred and fifty dollars?”
“It’s… about the quality.” You shrugged, “thirty dollars for a scrap of fabric that falls apart in a month made in a sweatshop isn’t a good investment.” You picked up the pair that he was looking at, reading through the tag, “something hand stitched made with quality fabric that’s going to last? Worth it.”
“Hmm.” He replied, surveying you for a minute as you put the thong back on the rack, “you know, I noticed when you picked up the coffee that you used a black card…”
“You’re really working those sleuthing skills today, aren’t ya?” You teased back with a grin, moving onto a wall of lace bras.
“It’s not exactly a difficult mystery.” He smirked, following you, “fancy shoes, nice jewels, new clothes, expensive lingerie,” you turned back to face him, an unimpressed look on your face and he practically caged you into the wall, “who’s your daddy?”
“Ew, Tony, fuck off.” You groaned, shoving at his chest as he laughed, “coffee and meals can be turned into a write off. I used Heather’s card.”
“Bah! Fine, keep your secrets. I’ll just run your financials when I get back to the office.”
Now it was your turn to laugh, “they call you a very Special Agent DiNozzo?”
“Why yes, yes they do.” He smiled, getting a little smug about it and you shook your head at him.
“Then explain to me how running my financials would let you in on whose card I’m using.” You asked, watching as he opened his mouth to give you some witty response but he couldn’t find one, gaping for a minute before he let out a defeated huff and you tugged him in the other direction, “now c’mon, I know you have a good eye for lingerie.”
“Now that, I will not deny.” He replied with a smile and you did roll your eyes as he followed you deeper into the shop.
You combed through practically every shelf in the place, trying to figure out what kind of styles you were going to settle on before Tony started to share his opinions. He reminded you how good blue looked on you when you picked up a soft pink set and suggested the lace florals over lace butterflies. You were narrowing it down between a handful of choices and he was quick to intervene when he noticed you were eliminating all the variation.
“Wait,” he cut in, swiping the one you were trying to put back on the shelf, “keep that one. Get rid of this one.” He plucked the peach set from your collection, tossing it into the return pile.
“It’s cute!” You protested.
“Exactly. Everything you’re keeping is ‘cute’, you’re playing it too safe and I know that’s not you. The lilac one is the nicest, little hint of lace for a bonus, so get it.” He started flicking through the rack you had your favourites on, “keep the teal one for the crystals, plus it matches that pair of heels you bought. The rest of this batch can go but add these to your buying list.” He picked up a lacy black and red set that was mostly see through and included a garter belt, handing it off to you, and a gorgeous deep green set. “That’ll look great with your skin,” his brow furrowed for a second as he examined it, “wait it’s not your size, you’re what?” His eyes were suddenly on you and you groaned,
“Stop staring at my tits.” You stated dryly as he turned around, grabbing another one of the green set from the shelf.
“Thirty four C, right?”
“I don’t know whether I should be impressed or grossed out that you were able to figure that out.”
“They don’t call me Very Special Agent DiNozzo for nothing.” He grinned and you rolled your eyes.
“I’m going to go try these on.” You scooped up the remaining sets, “not for your viewing pleasure! Occupy yourself.”
You weren’t surprised in the least when all of Tony’s recommendations were right and you were happy to be leaving with a variety of options. Returning from the dressing room you found him near the till looking through accessories and he shot you a cocky grin as you placed all of his choices down on the counter. You shuffled the shopping bags in your hand over to the other one,
“Can you hold this?” You asked, handing him your purse as you pulled Emily’s card from within it, passing it off to the cashier. Once the purchase was completed and the cashier was wrapping up the lingerie, she placed the card down on the counter and out of the corner of your eye you saw Tony making a move for it, managing to swipe it up before he could get to it.
“Hey!” You swatted the back of his head and he grimaced.
“Ow. That was worse than Gibbs.” He muttered.
“You fuck around and you’ll find out.” You returned but he was too busy on his phone to really pay attention.
You took your purse back from him, tossing it over your shoulder as you thanked the clerk and added the bag of lingerie to the others with your shopping and the two of you made your way back onto the street. You jumped when Tony’s fingers prodded at your side, digging into your ribs.
“C’mon… let me know something, please.” He batted his eyes at you, “I just helped you pick lingerie; I deserve to know something. Doctor? Artist? App developer? Congressman?”
“Nope, nope, nope and hard nope.” You replied with a huff and he groaned so you finally turned back to him, stalling in your steps, “what I will tell you, is that she most definitely outranks NCIS, so you can officially drop it.”
“Ohoho… a new lady friend…” It was his turn to slow in his tracks, eyes lingering in the window of the next shop, “you need any special accessories for that?”
“Tony you’re insane if you think I’m taking you into a sex toy store.”
“Meh, doesn’t really matter since you’ve already covered that step.” He grinned and your brow furrowed.
“What?”
“Swiped your phone and went through your emails.” With a laugh he tossed the device back to you as you let out a gasp, “peach flavoured lube, nice. Nipple clamps? Kinky, didn’t realize you were into that kinda pain.” That earned him a hard punch on the arm, “but that double sided dildo with vibration? Now that sounds like a real party.”
“Anothony DiNozzo!” You scolded and he let out a small whine of a scoff, gesturing toward the sex store.
“I’m the perfect person to give sex toy recommendations, c’mon.” He protested and you sighed.
“Tony. You are a straight man. What could you possibly known about sex toys for me to use with another woman?”
“One of those wand things, Hibachi?”
“That’s Japanese barbecue, but nice try.”
“The wands!”
“You’re going for Hitachi.”
“Close enough!” He exclaimed, gesturing with his hands, “the big one’s better but I think they sell smaller ones too, more portable.” He waggled his eyebrows at you and you sighed.
“Think? Tony, pull your head outta your ass. Any self respecting person with a clit already owns one of those.”
“Really?” He smirked at you and you did your best not to groan.
“I’ve got three, a mini pink, a mini green and the big one, which yes, is far superior. Can we go now?”
“Fine.” He groaned, feigning annoyance, “you dragging me to a nail appointment next?”
“No, I was gonna buy you a late lunch.”
“You were? Or is your mommy dearest gonna buy lunch.” He exaggerated the word, nearly moaning as he said it and you immediately grimaced.
“Please don’t ever do that again.”
“Yup, that one felt wrong coming out. My bad, that’s on me.”
**
Emily turned down dessert service, asking for the cheque instead as she gave the server a soft smile, picking up her cocktail once again as she turned back to you. In turn, you finished your drink, placing the glass down on the table as you stood, your hand coming to squeeze at Emily’s thigh softly as your lips brushed against her cheek.
“Give me a five minute head start, I’ve got a surprise for you.” You scooped up your phone, shooting Emily a wink as you sauntered away from the table in the direction of the elevator.
Her eyes followed you through the entrance of the lounge, narrowing in on your ass as you pushed the elevator button and the sparks began to fly through her body. It hadn’t been a particularly long week, but it was very safe to say that you had been on her mind more often than not. Images of your naked body strewn across the bed floating into her brain, making her cheeks flush while she was torturously bored with paperwork. A too long tedious conference call lead to her zoning out, daydreaming all the things she wanted to do to you, the noises you made echoing through her mind. It was almost a given that night that she had a rather self soothing shower when she got home, pulling her laptop out when she finally crawled into bed to take a look at what fun things she could buy to occupy your time with in the future weekends.
Emily settled the bill, slowly draining the rest of her cocktail until she was certain she’d given you enough time to do whatever it was you had planned before she finally left the restaurant. The key card beeped against the lock and she stepped inside the suite, letting the door swing shut behind her before she made sure it was locked. She stepped out of her heels, dropping her purse on the side table in the entry way before rounding the bed into the suite, catching a glimpse of you laid out on the bed and her lips twitched up into a grin.
“Well that certainly is a welcome sight.”
“Yeah?” You asked, sitting up and shifting onto your knees, “you see something you like?”
“I see plenty I like.” She walked up to the foot of the bed as you crawled on your knees to greet her, your hands settling on her hips as one of hers curled around the back of your neck, pulling your lips to hers for a kiss.
Her tongue easily slipped into your mouth when you let out a satisfied groan, both of you relaxing into the kiss, lips dancing with grace against each other. Her hand slipped into your hair, pulling out the pins to let it fall loose around your shoulders, pulling at it lightly. When her teeth scraped against your lip you couldn’t help but moan, your hands drifting up her body as you slowly began to unbutton her shirt. She broke the kiss to help you untuck the fabric from her pants, letting it drop to the floor behind her before her fingers began to trace the lines of the teal lingerie set, floating over the gems decorating your chest.
“You like the crystals?” You asked, small grin on your lips and she nodded.
“They’re gorgeous.”
“They’re Swarovski.” You replied with a near smirk and she let out a huff of a laugh.
“You really went all in, hey?”
“Just wanted to make sure I looked nice and pretty for you.” You shrugged coyly and she chuckled, giving you a once over.
“Well you do.” She leant down, kissing you gently before her hands nudged at your shoulders, “you’re not the only one who brought something fun, lie back princess.”
“I noticed.” You replied, a gleam in your eye as you dropped into the pillows, an arm extending to the nightstand where you picked up a silk tie, “multifaceted, curious as to what your intentions are.”
“First…” Emily rounded the side of the bed, “I want to see what’s under that gorgeous bra.” She nodded at you and you sat up, hands flying behind you to unclip it, gently tossing it to the side, “good girl.” She plucked the fabric from your hands, picking up a longer one from the nightstand before kneeling on the bed. “Give me your hands.” She instructed and you held your hands out for her, wrists gently pressed together as she began to wind the fabric around them, “is this okay?”
“Absolutely.” You replied, looking up at her with darkening eyes as she tightened the silk.
“Do you have a word?”
“I’m fond of peach.”
“Perfect.” With a wicked grin she placed a gentle kiss on your wrist before guiding you to lie back with your arms over your head and she looped the shorter piece through your bonds, securing the other end to the golden bar of the headboard. “No surprises there.” She purred as she slid off the bed, letting out a satisfied hum as her eyes dragged over your body.
“Hm?” You raised a brow, watching as she moved back to a spare chair.
“Just how pretty you look tied up like that.” Emily tossed a grin over her shoulder, “but you are going to need to roll over for the second part of your treat.”
You nearly let out a whine when her hands came to her belt buckle, eager to be able to see both what was coming next and what she had under her clothes. Instead of risking it you decided to behave, rolling onto your stomach, your arms stretching over your head as you twisted it to the side, just barely able to see Emily under your arm. She had busied herself with getting rid of her clothing, a neat pile forming on the small bench next to her bag as she pulled out the strap, swiftly stepping into it and securing it around her hips. Your mouth was practically watering already and then she reached into her bag again, pulling out a crop with a cute little heart on the end and you had to hold back a moan.
Emily could see the way your body tensed, how your hips ground down into the bed as she reapproached it and a dark chuckle escaped her lips. Kneeling on the bed behind you her hand grasped your ankle, spreading your legs further apart and you did your best to arch your back, presenting yourself to her.
“Such obedience.” She murmured, letting the crop lightly trace up your inseam as you let out an airy breath.
Emily slowly trailed the crop up and down your legs, just the slightest hint of touch that she knew you were absolutely begging for in your head. She could see the way your body twitched whenever it got close to the heat between your legs and a wicked grin took over her lips. The crop finally came up over the swell of your ass, softly circling and tracing patterns on your skin and you finally let out a whine. Since this was the first time you’d actually made a louder noise, Emily figured this was the time to both give in and start to really tantalize you now. She raised the crop, swatting it down onto your ass and you let out a low moan.
“You like that?”
“Mmhmm.” You eagerly nodded into the pillows and the crop trailed across to the other cheek, repeating the circles before coming down harder on that side and your breath caught in your throat.
“Ohh…” Your fingers interlaced, squeezing tightly, “harder, please.”
“My little princess likes it rough.” Emily husked from behind you, “somehow I’m not that surprised.”
The crop came down on the same spot harder than the first before she flicked it over your other cheek, swatting just as hard, watching the way your body reacted, jolting at the touch before grinding your cunt down onto the bed. She brought the head of the crop between your legs, pushing the fabric of your panties into your pussy, rubbing the leather up and down your folds as you moaned, arching into the touch.
“Fuuckk…”
Emily chuckled darkly, bringing the crop up before hitting your ass with more force, smirking at the louder moans leaving your lips, the way you were pulling against your bonds, wishing your hands were free. The sounds of the spanks echoed through the room, bouncing off the walls as your moans grew louder and longer, every time the crop was brought down onto your body it grew from a tingle to a pleasurable burn. Emily continued to trail the leather across your skin, occasionally her hand gently rubbing across the spot to sooth the burn, little praises and coos leaving her lips. The tingles each time she spanked you began to build, growing together with each hit of the crop until there was a fire building right under your skin, whimpers and whines leaving your lips as you buried your face into the pillows. Every swat of the crop made your entire body shiver and you were nearly about to start begging for more when she moved it back between your legs.
“You really like this, hmm?” She asked, pressing it against your cunt again, “making such a big wet spot on these nice panties.” She rubbed it harder against you, watching the way your wetness continued to soak the fabric, “you know, I’d take them off and stuff them in your mouth if you didn’t make such pretty noises…”
You groaned softly, your hips rocking back toward the touch, a little whimper leaving your throat when the crop nearly rubbed against your clit. Emily hummed softly, lifting the crop up before bringing it back down, this time onto your pussy and you couldn’t help the noise that escaped you.
“Oh fuucck…” Your head buried deeper into the pillows, your eyes scrunching shut as you felt your pussy fluttering around nothing, your clit nearly pulsing already, juices smearing across your underwear.
Emily’s hands grasped at your hips, flipping you onto your back watching as your legs instinctively fell open for her to see the growing wet spot on your panties. She brought the crop back to your cunt, rubbing it harder against you as you started to whine, resulting in another swat that brought a gasp from your lips.
“You like this even more, don’t you princess?” She asked with a grin and you nodded, “you want your pussy spanked too?” Spank. “Think you can come from just this?” Spank.
“Fuck.” You groaned, “more, please.”
“Always such nice manners.” She praised, her fingers slipping into the waistband of your thong, tugging the fabric down your legs and tossing it behind her. Her hands soothed up your legs, spreading them even further apart from each other as her thumbs dared to brush the edges of your cunt. “Such a pretty pussy. God you’re just fucking drenched already.”
Emily picked the crop back up, rubbing it through your slick folds, pressing harder as she brought it to your clit.
“Please.” You whimpered and she chuckled softly.
The first hit was on the gentle side, her eyes tracing up your naked body, watching your face for any sign of discomfort but all she found was a look of sheer pleasure. Your eyes fluttering shut, mouth falling open as breathy moans escaped them, it was all she needed to bring the crop down even harder the next time.
“Fuck.” Your body twitched off the bed, cunt pulsing as more juices dribbled out of it.
“That’s it princess.” Spank. “You’re doing so good for me.” Spank.
“Oh god…” Your hands clutched at the silk ties as your body shivered, pleasure building higher and higher with each time the crop hit your cunt.
“I know you’re close.” Spank. “Just a few more.” Spank. “Pussy’s so wet.” Spank. “Let go for me.” Spank.
“Fuck!” You cried out, your back arching off the bed, pulling against the restraints as your orgasm shot through you, pussy pulsating around nothing as your juices dripped onto the bedspread.
“That’s it.” Emily cooed, the crop gently rubbing against your cunt, smearing your wetness all around it and your thighs. “So pretty when you come for me.”
“Please…” you whimpered, “need you.”
“You want more?” She asked, gently spanking your pussy again and you whined.
“No, please! Need your cock.” You were absolutely begging, pussy fluttering, feeling so entirely empty. Despite the powerful orgasm you needed to be filled, stretched around Emily to finally feel completely satisfied.
“So needy tonight.” Emily teased, dropping the crop to the side as she climbed over you, running the tip of the toy through your folds, “this what you want?”
“Mmhmm.” You nodded furiously, “please.”
“Alright.”
Emily didn’t hesitate, knowing you were absolutely drenched she sunk her cock fully into you until her hips met yours and you let out a very satisfied moan. She pulled back just enough to sneak her hand between your bodies, turning on the vibration on the base of the toy, just against her clit and a breathy sigh escaped her lips. She rolled her hips, pulling out until just the tip was left inside you and set a steady pace, fucking you thoroughly. Each thrust of her hips had your body twitching up off the bed, pulling against your restraints as you ached to touch her, pleasure shooting through your limbs.
“Fuck.” You groaned, “feels so good.”
Each thrust of her cock the head brushed right over your g-spot, pulling louder moans from you each time as your pussy began to clench down around her. You could feel your juices smearing across both of your bodies as she fucked deeper into you, picking up the pace as she knew you were getting close again.
“Are you going to come again for me angel?” She cooed, her hands gliding up your body to toy with your nipples, pinching them and rolling them in time with her thrusts.
“S-s’close.” You moaned, your hips rocking up off the bed to meet hers with each thrust.
Your hands tugged against the silk ties again, gasping when Emily’s lips wrapped around one of your nipples, sucking it into her mouth for her tongue to flick patterns across it. The double, nearly triple sensation if you counted the vibrations hitting your clit each time your bodies met was nearly too much, your pussy making almost more noise than the ones coming from your mouth. All you could do was whimper and whine, your head too fuzzy to get actual words to come out, the coil inside you got tighter and tighter until Emily’s teeth sunk into your chest and it burst through you.
“Fuck!”
Your body trembled, the tingles shooting all the way from the tips of your fingers to the tips of your toes as Emily continued to fuck you. Her eyes fluttering shut as she let out a low swear, now focused on chasing her own release. She sunk fully into you, pressing the vibrating part of the toy directly against her clit and it gave you the opportunity to roll your hips against hers, grinding the base harder onto her. Your teeth sunk into your lower lip as your eyes scrunched shut, another orgasm bursting through you from the sensation and Emily let out a soft cry.
“Oh god.” Her hand slipped between your bodies, switching the vibrations off before she sat up.
Emily panted slightly, attempting to catch her breath as she reached out, swiftly undoing the ties and your arms were finally free to drop to the bed. You let out a soft groan, flexing your hands before Emily caught them in hers, examining your wrists to make sure you hadn’t pulled too hard and hurt yourself. Once satisfied that you hadn’t she let them drop and shifted on her knees, slipping out of you and watching your juices dribble onto the bed.
“Mmm…” you sighed, your lips curving up into a grin.
“What?” She asked with a raised brow.
“That was hot.” You replied, “kinda wish you could come inside me though.”
“Well…” she leant over you, kissing you before nipping at your lower lip, “I’m sure that can be arranged for next time.”
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@mickey-gomez @momlifebehard @daddy-heather-dunbar @maybe-a-humanbean @rustyzebra @leftoverenvy @kades95 @dextur @supercriminalbean @emilyprentisssluvr @lex13cm @zizzlekwum @emobabeyy @riveramorylunar @scorpsik @onmykneesformarvel @inlovewithemilyprentiss @regalmilfs4me @ara-a-bird @five-bi-five-mind @inlovewithmiddleagewomen @hotchs-bitch @ollysmulti @kmc1989 @irishavengersassemble @hopedoesntknow @venromanova @waitaminuteashh @noahrex @imlike-so-gaydude @wittygutsy @cx-emerald-cx @momily @nilaues @borinxnovak @soverign @v3nusxsky @blackbird-brewster @mccdreamys-writes @l4yne @obsessedwjill @supercorpstan97 @asolitaryrose3 @honeyycatt @trauma-factory @lisqueen @mrs-prentiss @whitewinewithice @d33pd3sires-blog
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itstheghostofmypast · 7 months
Text
His Honeybee
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Draco Malfoy x (f)Reader
Summary: She was as sweet as honey, as warm as the sun, and as bright as the colour yellow, that would always have his legs turn to jello. Her love for him was as vast as the sea, she was his honeybee.
Genre: Fluff (a tinge of angst)
Warnings: None
A/N: I swear I'm still try na catch up with my requests but please bear with me, I need to get this stuff out of my system from time to time to relax. Please remember to show some love by ❤️ and reblogs.
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With a small huff, he dropped his bag, eyes as clear as the lake before him, watching it glimmer under the rising sun. The mist around them had settled to a low veil, only adding to the chilly sensation, nipping at the tip of his ears.
Slowly, he settled down beside a warmer body, moving closer to welcome the furnace-like warmth, earning a small chuckle from the person beside him, his hand reaching to grab onto its counterpart, another half, to complete the puzzle, her hand.
"Didn't I tell you to wear a cap?"
Her voice was barely above a whisper, eyes never leaving the book, colouring book? It was at this point that his gaze moved from her alluring side profile to her lap, noticing the coloured pencils and markers on the other side in an unzipped pouch, then the book in her lap, watching her colour an abnormally large, unrealistic, geometric flower.
"Didn't I tell you it'll mess up my hair." his words came out a bit colder than he had intended to, the irritation in his tone was evident, but it was not because of her, never because of her. It was just the cold and the lack of attention he was being provided, but he didn't want her to think it was her fault, he had always tried to be gentle with her, and a tender undertone would resurface from within him around her.
"Even the one I knitted for you?" she pouted turning to look at him properly, a small gasp escaping her lips as she noticed the little kisses and nips left by Lady Winter herself, all across his face, the pink tips of his ears to the way his cheeks were splattered with pink and the tip his nose of a cute little rosy colour. "You look like you're freezing." she huffed letting go of his hand, much to his disapproval, turning to fish for something in her bag.
"You didn't knit me any....thing" his words slowly died off when she pulled out a woollen cap, with two strings on each side, it was by far the ugliest thing he had ever seen. It was by no means extraordinary, it was in no way a fashion statement or elegant, it was a simple, peasant-like - border line muggle-like- woollen cap.
"Tada! I did, " she gleamed before showing him another one, "For both of us." it was only then that he noticed the finer details about the caps, each had a customised trait. One of the caps was completely green, and in the centre was a woollen heart in yellow, while the other had a yellow base and a green heart in the centre- same design, inverted colours.
"Oh" his insult stopped before it could pour out, luckily the gears in his head had worked fast enough for it to click, their house colours and if he knew her like the back of his hand, which he did, she was going to give him the ghastly yellow one with the green heart and keep the green one with the yellow heart for herself.
"This one" Turning her upper body towards him, her hand reached up to his hair, fingers running through his hair, his eyes instinctively closing at the tender action, letting her touch and mess about his neatly styled hair, anyone else would've been burnt to death, but she wasn't just anyone. He hummed at her little comment about liking his new haircut, his bangs adding a nice flair to his aura, whatever that meant. A few minutes in and he had forgotten why she had begun to gently comb through his hair, basking in the oh-so-needed attention he had woken up early in the morning in the first place for, the need of attention that had him trudging through the damp, cold forest all the way to her, in their little corner, their little lake, just to be with her. An affectionate sensation faded away when he felt something warm sit atop his head, covering his ears, though the slightly itchy sensation forced him to snap his eyes open.
"There." tying up the two strings attached to each end of the earpiece, into a pretty bow she moved back to admire her work. His face had turned warmer, not because of the itchy woollen cap, but her little gesture, her look of admiration as if he were the prettiest thing in the world.
"Why...is it...yellow?" looking at anything but her face he mumbled out a question, he knew which one was his before she had even worded it out, but he couldn't figure out the ideology.
"Well" putting on her cap, leaving the strings undone, she smiled at him, "Because my heart is surrounded by you, everywhere I look, I see things that remind me of you like take this place, it's quiet and peaceful, and it's ours, I found this place because it reminded me of you, how you like quiet places, places where you are free from prying eyes, everywhere I go, I see you, like this lake, it's like I'm looking into your eyes, the way it sparkles under the sun reminds me of how your eyes twinkle in potions class when we learn something new, or how when we go to the library, the section way at the back, with the books no one touches, reminds me of the ample knowledge you have on topics I couldn't even think of, how you're so much smarter than everyone, yet, no one approaches you for help out of hesitance, just how no one goes at the back old isle." her eyes caught how a small smile had made its way on his face, how he was now holding onto her hand again, "That's why my heart is surrounded by you. I hope...yours is surrounded by me." peaking up at him, as he turned his face around, hiding his expressions from her, a part of her wanted to tease him for being shy, but perhaps that was for another time. Instead, she settled back down after hearing a faint whisper, "Of course, mine too, is surrounded by you, silly girl."
"Good." with that she let go of his hand and went back to colouring, letting a comfortable silence settle between the two.
It took him a good ten minutes to calm down, her little confession had his chest hammering against the walls of his chest, demanding to be set free so it could nestle in the warm, tender palm of hers, all pretty and all hers. He knew his palm was sweaty against hers, and he prayed to God that she wouldn't continue with her teasing, knowing fully well he'd either snap in retaliation or just run away to cry in joy somewhere in a corner. The noise of his pesky, beating heart rang in his ears, constantly reminding him of his undying love for her. After the ringing dyed out his attention turned towards the scratching sound, noticing the bold choice of colours she was using to colour the unrealistic flower, his curiosity no longer being confined by his sense of logic as it slipped out,
"Why are you colouring?"
"It's therapeutic."
"Colouring like a child ?"
"Hmm, it's designed for an older audience."
"So colouring is a nice way to relax?"
"Mhmmm..." Pulling out another colour she glanced at him, "What do you do to relax?"
What did he do to relax? Most of the time he'd be too frustrated with his father and grades to even care to relax. If he did ever get a moment of peace, it was with her. As she had mentioned before, he was surrounded by her, his senses were flooded with her presence, he'd be thinking about her more often these days, perhaps because winter break was upon them. Winterbreak meant that the two would have to part, he'd go back home to his cold mansion and she'd go back to her loving parents. Parents who knew he existed, unlike his own, who had no idea who she was or if she existed, perhaps if he could build the courage this time, he might tell them, he was after all in his 6th year.
"Draco?"
"I sketch." the words left him sooner than he expected, it wasn't his fault though, he was too distracted by her curious eyes, her inviting scent, her warm and tender aura, his brain would often short-circuit around her, and this was one of those times.
"Ah...that's nice, I've never seen any of your sketches before." she giggled, once again letting go of his hand to turn to her bag, missing the way he shrugged with a "Burn them afterwards."
"Well" turning to him she handed him her sketchbook and pencils, "Don't burn this one, I wanna keep it safe and close to me." she smiled at his surprised eyes, adding in a little "Please" Much to his pleasure, for she knew that would make him all putty and it did.
A few beats of silence later, all that could be heard was the gentle sounds of nature waking up around them, the sun ever so slowly waltzing up higher into the sky, trying to own the cold floor with its glow and warmth within the winter sky. The birds would often change the tune around them, from a soft melody to a high-pitched orchestra of chirps, much to their pleasure, this was what he loved most about spending time with her, everything would be so pleasant, so calming and so warm, caressing his soul with such a tender delicate touch, allowing him to bask in her presence, a feeling he wanted to lounge in for almost all of eternity if it were possible.
Ever so often she'd notice him glance at her, then look ahead, unsure of whether he wanted to ask her something, or tell her. Truth be told, she had been meaning to ask him something, something about them, but perhaps she was too afraid to do so, afraid that it would scare him away. It took so long for him to open up to her, even after they had become an official couple, at least official enough for their close friends to know, but she knew his parents were not aware of her presence. She never brought it up, even after she had introduced him to hers, admiring how he was able to hold up a conversation with her father, gushing over the way he was being forced to eat more by her mother after he had complimented her cooking. She thanked him with her whole being when he had told her how he felt about her home that night, when he lay next to her, snuggled under the covers with her on her cramped single bed in matching pyjamas, "It isn't special, but I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world...it's warm...and nice...mine is...cold. I like it here, I like being here with you."
A part of her wanted to ask him if he'd ever want to be with her outside of school, or what would happen to them after their school years came to an end. Would their relationship cease to exist? Would their love turn into a bundle of memories they'd turn to in their darkest times? Would she just be his secret lover he was destined to leave? Perhaps she felt this way due to the upcoming winter break, all these questions finally bottling up to the max, ready to spill over. But she couldn't, she had to be careful, for she knew no matter how cold or tough he would act, he was but a fragile soul, always yearning for the approval of his parents, for their love and admiration, especially his father's, one he barely received. So, she had to be careful and phrase it properly, because even if he feared his father, she was terrified of the man, she had seen him only a handful of times at school and if there was one thing she was sure about was that other than muggles, he hated Hufflepuffs as well. Maybe their love was short-lived, maybe she should prepare herself for the day he'd let her go, because in this situation it was not the "It's not you it's me", since it wasn't him, he was perfect in all and every sense, but it was her if she wasn't sorted in Hufflepuff, she was from a more prominent family if she was...perfect like him, maybe, then just maybe, their fates could have intertwined till eternity, if only the stars had, for once, listened to her and not decided for her, it only.
"Oh" his gasp broke her train of thought, "I'm late for practice!" he shot up, looking down at her, who was staring up at him like a deer caught in headlights, face flushed, her cap now covering her forehead, as she blinked up at him. Letting out a chuckle he bent down to brush his slightly chapped lips against hers, fingers gently gripping her chin, tilting her head to look up at him, "I've made up my mind, my honeybee, come with me this winter break, I...I don't know what to expect, but I know for sure I want you in my life, whether anyone likes it or not." With that, he knelt one last time to give her a proper kiss, "Finish your colouring, you've been on the same petal for an hour."
"Draco! Wait!" she called out, only for him to turn his head and give her that heart-stopping smile, winking at her before running off to the schoolyards, not waiting for her to speak.
"You're still wearing the....cap." she sighed before letting out a nervous chuckle, well then, at least one thing was clear, his parents may not need to wait till winter break to find out about their boy's heart belonging to a Hufflepuff, especially when his entire Quidditch team would see him in his woollen cap. Shaking her head, she turned to grab the sketchbook flipping it over to look at what he had been sketching, a soft gasp leaving her lips, as her fingers dug into the paper, eyes turning glossy at the sight. For more than an hour, he had sat there, sketching her, from every dimple to strand of hair, the details added in just made her wonder who he had sketched, for this ethereal being could not have been her. That is until she read the little sign off underneath, "My precious honeybee."
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megalony · 11 days
Text
What He Deserved
This is a new protective! Tommy Kinard imagine, based on a few requests I've gotten.
Thank you all for the lovely Tommy requests! I'm loving writing about the medal ceremony.
Taglist: @justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @luula @missdreamofendless @bradleybeachbabe @woderfulkawaii @amberpanda99 @daggersquadphantom @marvel-and-chicago-fan @angryknightstatesmantrash @minjix @lyjen @kmc1989 @itsmytimetoodream @noonenuts @hiireadstuff @ashie-babie @classyunknownlover @jayyeahthatsme @sp1ritssz @dumb-fawkin-bitch @oliverstarksbae @gimatida @heart-35 @supernaturalstilinski @stefansalvatoresgf @kyky9103 @wutheringhearts2275 @gay4hotmilfs @itshamleth @chaoticnosleepinfluencer @gs29 @wh0reforsmutstuff @mel-vaz @natashamea18 @chrisevansdaughter @alexandra8484 @deena-beena-weena @targaryenluvs @shelbygeek @kpoplover-19 @marvelmenarebeautiful @gillybear17
@zoeybennett @mrspeacem1nusone @zephyrmonkey @estella-novella @eleventhdoctorsangel @kniselle @senjoritanana
@shauna-carsley @dottierose @cfdhouse51 @darkfemme1 @rainechase45 @ml572 @jessie-lynn28 @lolalolsstuff @jupiter1700 @ashdoctor @an-aliens-ghost @lunaroserites
Tommy Kinard Masterlist
Summary: Tommy brings his wife and newborn down to the 118 for their award ceremony. But when his old Captain starts making slurs and comments about his wife, Tommy loses his temper.
Enjoy.
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(Y/n) tilted her head down and looked over the dress she was wearing. Her fingers danced across the soft fabric, smoothing out the few wrinkles that formed around her waist.
Her lips pressed together, smothering the small smile that tried to break out across her face, but her smile seemed to reach her eyes instead.
Pale blue had never really been (Y/n)'s colour, it didn't seem to stand out or match her very well. But she had to admit that this colour did look rather lovely on her today. Maybe it was because Tommy loved this colour. Or maybe it was because this colour was a close match to Tommy's eyes, one of the main reasons (Y/n) bothered to buy it in the first place.
The dress was comfy; often most of the dresses she used to wear looked lovely, but they were uncomfortable. The necklines were too low, they didn't come up high enough to cover her bra at the back. The underlining was scratchy and itched her thighs or the dress itself was pulled tight at the waist and made her feel like she couldn't breathe.
This one was different. It had a circular neckline that was very stretchy and easy to to pull up or down. The back was almost as high as her shoulderblades, meaning the nursing bra she wore was easily hidden and (Y/n) could stay comfortable. And there was no underlining that itched or scratched or puffed out around her.
(Y/n) bit down on her bottom lip and moved her hands up to her hair, fiddling with the style once again even though nothing was wrong with it.
She couldn't help but look down at her frame once again as a quiet sigh passed her lips.
She had more curves now than she used to. Before she had Minnie, (Y/n) had never been skinny, but she had been okay with the curves and the shape of her body. Gaining weight during her pregnancy had been fine, it was normal and (Y/n) didn't feel self conscious because she had a reason. She had had a baby. But now, Minnie was here and it was almost like (Y/n) didn't have a reason to be this shape now.
She didn't have a bump to caress or stretch her shirts over- mostly Tommy's shirts since she had lived in his clothes during the last four months of her pregnancy. But she had a lot of baby weight now.
(Y/n) knew it wouldn't disappear as soon as she had Minnie, she knew it would take time. But that also meant it was going to take time to get used to her new shape and become comfortable in her new skin.
She was brought out of her thoughts when a set of large hands curled over her hips and a chin perched on top of her head.
"Do I look okay?" Her voice was quieter and meeker than normal, giving away the panic that was fluttering inside her chest with horrid bouts of adrenaline.
She looked up in the mirror, observing Tommy's expression that seemed to soften like melted butter. His cheeks puffed up showing a dimple on the left cheek and small crows feet creased around his eyes that locked with hers in their reflection.
She could feel his thumbs smoothing up and down over her hips and he turned his chin down so he could press a soft kiss into her hair. There was no need to ask Tommy that question because they both knew what the answer was going to be, but she felt like asking him anyway.
This was going to be the first time (Y/n) would be out around Tommy's friends and colleagues since she'd given birth to Minnie two weeks ago. (Y/n) wanted to look good and feel confident in herself and her newly shaped body, but she didn't quite know how to do that yet.
"You. Look. Stunning." Each word was punctuated with a kiss against her head that was careful not to ruin her hairstyle. And his voice was rugged and low like he was having a hard time staring at her and controlling himself at the same time.
(Y/n) smiled, but when their intense stare broke off, she found herself looking over the dress again. And her hands moved to slide up and down her stomach and around her curves that she still couldn't get used to.
Her absentminded movements halted when Tommy held her wrists and dropped her hands down so he could continue the movements himself. His fingertips tickled as they dragged up and down her stomach and crossed the dips in her waist like he wanted to commit each of them to memory. And he was smiling as he did it.
He was looking down at her like each curve made him happy and just the thought sent (Y/n)'s heart jumping over a beat like a record player jumping a vinyl.
"What, you don't believe me?" His voice was quieter this time and he went back to propping his chin up on her head. While his hands finally stopped roaming her body so he could bind his arms around her middle and give her a tight squeeze.
"You're a bit biased, sweetheart." She was joking. Her tone was light and her smile told him she was only teasing, but there was truth to her words.
Tommy was always going to be biased because she was his wife. He would stand there and tell her he thought she was the most exquisite woman he'd ever seen and in his mind, he was right. But that was only his view because he loved her.
And (Y/n) was glad Tommy thought she looked lovely, but it wouldn't be just him there at the ceremony today. All of his friends and close colleagues would be there and (Y/n) didn't want any of them to look at her and think she looked awful or chubby or odd.
"Maybe, but I'd never lie to you, and I think you look better than ever."
He thought she looked beautiful.
It had been no secret to anyone that Tommy could barely keep his hands off of her when she was pregnant. He was always attached to her, kissing her or holding her or carressing her stomach. He loved the way her body changed and it was no different now that she'd had Minnie.
They had gone out a few days ago, the first time (Y/n) had properly left the house since coming home with Minnie, because (Y/n) had to get some new clothes.
She couldn't continue living in her maternity clothes. Some of the leggings weren't so bad, but the tops were too baggy and didn't fit now her stomach had deflated into a strange shape and her curves were softer. And all her maternity dresses or jumpsuits didn't sit well on her anymore and made her look a very odd shape. Baggy maternity clothes were not flattering in the least.
Wearing Tommy's clothes was fine for around the house or the occasional button up shirt when they went out. But (Y/n) needed clothes of her own to make herself feel and look a bit more normal, and she couldn't fit into any of her old clothes.
So while the maternity clothes had been bagged and hidden at the back of the wardobe- just in case there was a next time that she would need them again- they had gone out for new clothes.
It had been Tommy's idea, he knew (Y/n) didn't look happy when she tried to find something to wear since coming home with Minnie.
And while they had been out, every top, dress and shirt (Y/n) tried on, Tommy agreed to. She saw his eyes crease and light up and he smiled at everything she picked out and seeing her look happy and more comfortable was all Tommy wanted.
"Thank you," (Y/n) gave his wrists a squeeze and turned her head so she could press her lips to his neck.
She missed his touch when he finally unravelled from her and turned around, but he didn't wander far. (Y/n) smoothed out another imaginary wrinkle in her dress before she turned on her heels, her eyes following Tommy as he moved over to the crib in the corner of the room beneath the window.
He grinned, flashing his teeth and shaking his head when he reached down and scooped up his little girl. She barely fit in the crook of his arm and she always looked like a miniature doll whenever Tommy held her and the sight made (Y/n) smile.
"Hi baby, are you gonna come and meet daddy's team, hm?" He gently settled Minnie down against his shoulder, letting her face nuzzle into his blazer right across the LAFD logo on his chest.
His hand cradled the back of her head and his fingertips feathered across her soft skin. When he turned round, his smile softened again when his eyes landed on (Y/n) and he walked over to her, murmuring a quiet "Ready?" to which she nodded.
This would be Tommy's first medal since joining the LAFD.
***
"Sweetheart, I don't think they'll let you take her up there with you, you know." (Y/n) pressed her lips together to dampen down her smile as she looked up at her husband with fondness pooling in her eyes. She didn't miss the shiver that rolled through Tommy's spine when that petname rolled off the tongue.
Something so simple as 'sweetheart' had the ability to make the tall, hulk of a man in front of her swoon and melt into a puddle.
He had barely set Minnie down since they arrived at the station and the ceremony was about to begin.
As settled as Minnie seemed to be in Tommy's arms, (Y/n) doubted Chief Simpson would be very pleased if Tommy was stood up there holding his newborn during the awards.
Tommy let out a quiet displeased huff but he nodded. He knew he had to leave his girls now and go stand up on stage, something he wasn't so keen on doing but he didn't have a choice.
He pressed a lasting, tender kiss against Minnie's temple and gently unhooked her hand from his index finger that she had been happily clinging to for the last five minutes. He leaned forward and eased her down into (Y/n)'s arms while his hands moved to hold (Y/n)'s hips instead.
She settled Minnie in her arm, trying to keep her tilted at the same angle Tommy had her so she wouldn't wake up and start to fuss. If she could sleep through the speeches and the medals, then she could wake up when the hustle and bustle started. (Y/n) wanted to watch and get a picture of Tommy up there, she didn't want to have to make a quick exit to settle Minnie if she woke up and started to cry.
"Off I go," Tommy murmured quietly, moving his hand to tilt (Y/n) chin up in his direction so he could steal a kiss that ended with his tongue slipping past her lips.
(Y/n) watched him follow after Buck and Chimney towards the stage, towering over the others like a skyscraper in comparison. She knew Tommy was happy to be the tallest because it gave him an excuse to stand out the way at the back and feign it was to let his colleagues see and not overshadow them. When really, it was so he didn't have to bask in the spotlight any longer than necessary.
Her head turned to the right and she took a deep breath, looking over the round tables scattered all through the station floor.
The ambulance and both trucks had been parked round the back so there was enough space for a party in here. And two other nearby stations were on standby so all calls could be redirected to them. Allowing the 118 to have the whole day off to celebrate without the risk of a callout getting in the way and disrupting everything.
Her eyes locked on Maddie sat on her own with her daughter and (Y/n) decided it would be a good idea to see if she could sit with them.
"Is this seat free?"
"Yeah, please," Maddie waved her hand towards the seat as if it was on fire and her smile calmed down one of the many nerves rattling through (Y/n)'s system.
She pulled out the chair and eased down next to Maddie, smiling softly at the four year old on Maddie's other side. She had a juice bottle between her hands and a sweet smile on her lips that made (Y/n) sure that she was a very cheeky toddler.
"Oh, she's adorable." Maddie's lower lip pouted and she placed a hand over her heart, leaning close to get a look at Minnie.
Since Tommy reconnected with the 118, he had introduced (Y/n) to them a few months ago and she had bonded with Maddie the most. The four of them had gone out quite a few times for quiz nights or just out for drinks- all non-alcoholic since (Y/n) had been expecting Minnie at the time.
This was the first time any of the team would see Minnie. They all knew she had been born, Tommy had messaged them and posted a few pictures. They got a lot of well-wishes from all the team, but they had mostly stayed home for the first two weeks to get used to new routines with their little girl.
"How are you doing now? Tommy mentioned you're feeling a lot better." She brushed her finger across Minnie's chubby cheek, darting her eyes between (Y/n) and the newborn with a tender yet knowing look in her eyes.
She and Chimney had seen first-hand how ill (Y/n) had been when she was pregnant.
At the start of her pregnancy, (Y/n) had been in and out of hospital with severe morning sickness. Tommy had come off a twelve hour night shift and then spent the next twenty four hours in hospital after he came home and found (Y/n) passed out in the bathroom, dehydrated after throwing up everything she had in her.
It took a while for the morning sickness to taper off, but (Y/n) had developed a type of gestational diabetes during the pregnancy too which ended with almost daily insulin injections.
Needless to say, it hadn't been easy having Minnie. Topped off with the way her body changed, (Y/n) had found it hard. But she knew she was lucky to be feeling well right now and that her insulin and glucose levels evened themselves out now she wasn't pregnant anymore. Some women developed diabetes after having it during pregnancy, (Y/n) was very thankful she didn't have that problem.
"Much better, thank you."
"And you look lovely, by the way. I love the dress." Maddie took a sip of her drink and reclined in her seat while she looked up and down the dress approvingly. The colour was lovely and it stood out well with Tommy's jet black suit. They would of looked a little too dark if (Y/n) wore a black or a navy blue dress today. The contrast was good.
A jolt surged through (Y/n)'s heart and her breathing quickened as she tilted her head down, looking across at her friend through her lashes.
"Really?" The surprise was evident in her voice and it intrigued Maddie. "I uh, it's new. I don't really fit in any of my old clothes anymore."
Saying that while she was pregnant felt good, it felt like an achievement because it was natural. (Y/n) had been happy to put on weight and look different and have a bump to show that she was having a family and Tommy loved her enough to settle down with her.
Now it felt strange like she wasn't doing something right when she thought about fitting back into her old clothes. But her heart had soared when she had made a passing comment last week to Tommy about her clothes not fitting. He had such a wide grin when he simply responded 'good' and kissed her like he had a fever.
"Oh, tell me about it. I still don't wear most of the stuff I owned before I had Jee."
"You don't?"
"No, I lost a bit of weight after having her but, I don't know, I like the way I look now. Sometimes the extra weight looks good… it works for you too." She whispered the last part, nudging their elbows together as a loving smile flooded her face.
Maybe there wasn't such a rush to try and get back to the way she was before. And she didn't have to, there was no deadline or no reason why she should, she'd had a baby and this was what she had to show for that.
She didn't realise she was smiling until her cheeks began to hurt and she lifted her head to look over at the stage.
There was her husband. Stood at the back on the far right, his hands clasped together in front of him with his back tensed up straight and his broad shoulders stretched out like they were balancing spirit levels on them. His nose crinkled and his lips rolled together as he tried not to laugh out loud at something Buck whispered to him. And the look made (Y/n)'s heart swell.
He looked so happy, so natural and composed and proud and strong up there and (Y/n) just knew in a day or two, she would be scouting through the official site and a few online apps to find the pictures that would be uploaded of today. She wanted all the pictures of Tommy that she could get, especially the ones that the photographer took when none of the team were looking or posing. When they looked happy and natural and soft together.
(Y/n) leaned down to kiss the top of Minnie's head and slowly started to sway from side to side, but her eyes remained focused on the stage.
And she could see the blush creeping onto Tommy's face when it was his turn to be awarded with his medal and plaque. His smile reached his eyes and his blush tainted his nose, cheeks and slithered down his neck beneath his collar.
She could see his hands fidgeting in front of his lap, scratching together to remain calm and composed until he could move to the back of the stage again and blend into the background. Not that he could ever blend in when in (Y/n)'s eyes, he always stood out.
As soon as the clapping started and everyone began to move, (Y/n) felt Minnie liven up in her arms.
She carefully lifted Minnie up and settled her on her chest, smoothing her hand up and down her back slowly to try and keep her calm and settled. She could feel Maddie reaching out to rub Minnie's cheek, quietly cooing at her as everyone finally left the stage and started to filter around the room again.
Tommy's hand found her shoulder and his other hand gently cupped the back of Minnie's head. He leaned down, pressing a kiss to (Y/n)'s head as he stood behind her chair and felt her lean her head against his torso.
"Looks good on you," (Y/n) whispered, reaching one hand up to tap her fingertip against the medal hanging around his neck. She wondered how long it would take before Tommy whipped the medal off and hid it in (Y/n)'s bag. She already knew he would leave it up to her to find a place for it somewhere at home.
"Hm, does it really?" His hand stayed on her shoulder as he leaned down to meet her halfway in a kiss. Before he slid his other hand down from cradling Minnie's head to slither his hand along (Y/n)'s waist and give her hip a squeeze.
They broke apart when Tommy felt a hand on his shoulder and he leaned up just as Eddie moved round.
He stood between (Y/n) and Maddie and crouched down until he was level with the newborn in her arms. A wide smile creased his eyes and he reached out to nudge her cheek.
"Hi cutie… can I?"
"Sure." (Y/n) gently eased Minnie over into Eddie's arms who stood back up to his full height once she was in his arms. As soon as he was up, Eddie was swaying from left to right, bouncing her up and down against his chest, his eyes enamoured by her like she was the brightest star in the sky.
(Y/n) was sure she heard her husband mutter a quiet "Be careful," although she wasn't certain whether it was in jest or if he was being serious. But she smiled and reached up to hold Tommy's arm when he went back to holding her shoulders and leaned down to be level with her.
"Want something to eat?" He murmured against the shell of her ear, leaving a few kisses against the side of her neck until she was shivering and gripping his arm tighter.
"Sure."
With another lasting kiss to her lips, Tommy followed after Chimney and Buck towards the buffet table. All three of them were famished and Tommy would bet that they had skipped breakfast the same as he had, too consumed with nerves and worries about today to eat until now.
(Y/n) let her eyes follow the boys as they headed off to the table and she couldn't help but gaze at Tommy. He towered over Chimney and stood just a few inches taller than Buck, with wider shoulders and a large tense back. He looked like a beast in and out of his uniform.
Her head tilted back to look up at Eddie when Minnie started to mewl and cry into his shoulder.
He tried to soothe her and hush but her eyes screwed shut and her legs began to tap against his chest like she was trying to run mid-air.
"I think she needs feeding, give me one second." She pushed up from the chair, smoothing down the imaginary wrinkles in her dress as she headed off near the locker room.
Her head dipped down and her hands itched at her sides as she reached the pram and unhooked the Disney bag from the handle.
She had tried to time Minnie's feed so she wouldn't need to leave during the middle of the ceremony but now was a good time because she would settle for another nap after this. With the bag on her shoulder, (Y/n) headed back over to the table and smiled when Eddie carefully eased Minnie back into her arms.
"She's such a sweetheart, I'm sure Chris will wander over to see her in a bit." Eddie gave the girls a lasting smile before he headed back towards Chris to see if he wanted to go and get some food before Buck and Ravi ate it all.
The newborn continued to whine and wriggle, but her cries softened just a little now that she was back in her mother's arms.
(Y/n) cradled her in one arm while she set the bag down on the spare chair next to her and rummaged through for a blanket while she sat down.
She could see Maddie and Jee over at the buffet table while Buck, Tommy and Chimney were stood just a few feet from the table. All three of them were joking and laughing about something and it was lovely to see Tommy relaxing and letting his guard down for a change.
Their eyes locked for a second and (Y/n) saw his lips curve into a wider smile and he winked in her direction. He looked very laid back for a change. Whenever he had his work suit on, it was for a formal occasion and Tommy always felt out of place or uneasy or as if he should be professional.
But right now, stood with one hip slouched down, one hand holding a paper plate for them to share and his other hand tucked into his pocket, he looked casual. He looked relaxed and happy and his head tilted back to let out a laugh when Buck seemingly quipped a joke.
"Okay baby, shh." Her lips pressed to the top of Minnie's head, her nose tickling and scrunching up against the small wisps of hair.
She kept her settled in one arm while she tried to drape the blushing pink blanket over her shoulder and down her chest. The last thing she wanted was anyone looking at her if she was going to breastfeed Minnie.
Not that anyone was paying any attention. She was sat alone at the table at the moment and the table was in the left corner of the station, as close to the stage as possible but now no one was focused on the stage.
The only person who would pay her any attention was Tommy and that was for a whole other reason.
She gently shifted Minnie up in her arm and adjusted the blanket over her, but before she even had chance to try and fiddle with the strap on her dress, she paused.
Someone was staring at her, and it wasn't Tommy.
(Y/n) didn't recognise him. He was an older gentleman, a bit shorter than Buck with a cap tucked under one arm and a few pins on his blazer, giving away that he was a Captain of one of the fire houses. (Y/n) only knew a few people from the 118 and the people from Tommy's station, the 227 and not many of them were here. She didn't know anyone else and she didn't know the Captain who was currently staring her down.
The look in his eyes was frightening, it was as if he was scrutinising her, looking her up and down to try and evaluate her for something. His upper lip was pushed out, hidden mostly by a thick grey moustache and his chin was jutting forward in a commanding sort of way.
His eyes raked up and down (Y/n)'s body with one brow raised and she couldn't find it in herself to look down or shift or move an inch.
All she could do was look towards Tommy, desperately wanting him to tilt his head in her direction and catch her eye to see that she was panicking.
"You're really gonna do that here?"
His words took her by surprise and (Y/n) stayed frozen to the spot while Minnie wriggled in her arm and batted her hand against her chest as if trying to grab her attention. Small whines vibrated into (Y/n)'s chest as the newborn continued to whimper and kick around beneath the blanket.
"I'm sorry?" She wanted her words to come out condescending but her voice only came out in a small flurry of panic.
What was she doing wrong?
She wasn't stood in the middle of the station or trying to catch anyone's attention or cause a scene. All she was trying to do was feed her daughter. It was natural. She was at a table in the corner and she was sat on her own, she wasn't sat with the Chief or any other Captains or photographers or important people.
She would be sat with friends once Maddie came back and then Tommy would sit with her, she doubted anyone else would be at their table, maybe Buck but that was it.
None of them would have a problem with her breastfeeding and if they did, (Y/n) would move.
But she was sat with a blanket over her chest. No one was going to see anything they shouldn't, she was still decent and covered up.
"You're gonna show 'em off to the whole station?" He spoke with a small huff and his lips formed into a smirk that made a cold shiver run down (Y/n)'s spine. He talked as if (Y/n) was getting ready to some sort of strip tease in the middle of the station or up on stage.
All she was doing was trying to feed her daughter. It was bad enough that (Y/n) worried about how she looked in this dress and how her body looked now she'd had Minnie. Without this Captain, whoever he was, standing there insulting her and making jibes at her because he thought he had the right to make her feel self-conscious.
"No. I- should you really be stood watching me?" She tried to muster up some of Tommy's courage and boisterous attitude, but the man only laughed.
A cringe tore through her body as she held Minnie tighter and leaned her head to the left.
Relief pooled in her stomach that was bubbling and overchurning with adrenaline when she caught sight of Tommy. But the adrenaline got worse when she looked over her husband.
He was red in the face.
His hand was crumpling up the paper plate until the food was about to spill over the edges. His lips were tense and taut and his jaw was ground so tight it looked like it was going to pop. There was utter outrage bubbling up in his eyes that had gone from pale blue to jet black in less than a minute.
He heard. Tommy had heard what this stranger had said, and he was not pleased.
(Y/n) was both relieved and panicked when she watched her husband almost throw his plate at Buck before he stormed their way. But he wasn't quick enough before the Captain started to speak again.
"Thought it was a free show, sweetheart. After all, you're sat out in the open, about to show us all a good view, so carry on." His hand moved to dart across his chin and the way he licked his lips had (Y/n) shivering and shrinking back in her seat. "Does Kinard know you go round flashing all his mates?"
She could of screamed when he took a step closer, slanting his right hip against the vacant chair next to (Y/n) like he was about to sit down next to her.
Whipping the blanket from her shoulder, (Y/n) tossed it down on her bag and got up from her seat. She wasn't going to sit here and be insulted any longer and she was too uncomfortable to stay here. She wanted to be with Tommy and disappear into a quiet corner.
Her hands adjusted Minnie so she was settled in the middle of her chest and she cradled the back of her head while she weaved around the seats. There wasn't a lot of space between whoever this Captain was and the wall, but (Y/n) pressed as close to the wall as she could to get past him.
"What the Hell did you just say to my wife?!" Tommy's voice growled through the air and caught the attention of everyone nearby.
Suddenly, the music sounded quieter in the background and all the other conversations died down as all eyes landed on Tommy. Both Chimney and Buck moved to put their plates down and hurry after him. They had never seen Tommy lose his very level temper or run out of patience and they didn't want him to start a fight. They knew who Gerrard was and he wasn't worth the effort.
A gasp tumbled past (Y/n)'s lips and she jolted forward when she felt the Captain's hand hook under the strap on her dress. The strap was slightly down her arm since she had been about to feed Minnie, but she felt him try and pull the material either to look down at her cleavage or just to lower it down and tease her.
Tommy was usually the epitome of calm and composed, he never spoke out of turn or caused a scene, and he had never stood up to Gerrard when they both worked in this station. But the fire in his eyes showed he had well and truly lose that composure.
For a brief second, (Y/n) felt Tommy's hand on her hip as she moved to stand behind him. She felt him squeeze her hip and move to block her from view and it made her feel safe.
Right until Tommy lunged forward and landed his fist into the Captain's face.
Blood spurted down Gerrard's face, tainting his moustache and pouring down his lips towards his chin like a free flowing river. Both his hands moved to cradle his nose that might well be broken and he groaned through a splutter of blood. His balance swayed as he wobbled to the left but he didn't stay unbalanced for long when Tommy's hands latched around the collar of his blazer.
He yanked his old Captain forward, lifting him up on the toes of his boots to keep them level. Fire blazed in Tommy's eyes and his lips formed into a snarl as he debated whether to smash his forehead into his old Captain or send a punch into his gut and knock him to the floor.
"Tommy…" (Y/n) shivered, tucking her face up against the top of Minnie's head who was shrieking into her chest at all the sudden commotion.
She felt a hesitant pair of hands on her arms and whipped her head round to see Chimney stood beside her. He tried to smile and dipped his head to the side towards Maddie who had Jee in one arm and her other hand held out towards (Y/n), beckoning her away from the fight.
She took a few steps towards Maddie but stayed relatively close, she didn't want to be far from Tommy and she needed to get him to stop before he got himself reprimanded.
"Tommy- hey, hey that's enough." Buck hurried forward and grabbed Tommy by the shoulders, but his friend was strong enough to hold steadfast like a mountain, unable to be moved.
Even when Eddie surged forward and tried to get between them, Tommy just elbowed him out the way and twisted Gerrard to the left so he could pin him up against the wall.
"Jesus Kinard," Gerrard grumbled, unsure whether to cradle his broken nose or push the younger man off him. "Take it easy-"
"Take it easy? After what you just said to my wife? You're lucky I haven't pasted your blood across the walls for that." Venom seethed into his words as he suddenly wished they were in a corridor or in the locker room or somewhere more private so he could win this fight without an audience.
But the moment he heard the word 'flasher' pass Gerrard's lips, nothing else mattered. He couldn't concentrate on Eddie trying to worm in between him and Gerrard or feel Buck pulling his shoulders to try and drag him backwards. He didn't even hear Bobby shouting at them to stop.
He brought his knee up, ramming it into Gerrard's groin before anyone could stop him. The Captain crumpled down with a groan that ended in a spluttering cough and Tommy finally let the team pull him five steps backwards so he could watch Gerrard fall to his knees.
"Enough!"
"He just intimidated and tried to touch up my wife!" Tommy's chest heaved like he had run a marathon and his hands balled into fists.
He was about to lunge forward again but Eddie anticipated the move and stood in front of him. He pushed against Tommy's chest, trying to keep him at bay while Bobby grabbed his shoulder to try and get his attention and calm him down.
"And Chief Simpson is gonna have a talk with him in my office, you have my word, Tommy. Now go cool off and look after your wife."
Bobby had heard all the stories about Gerrard when he used to be in charge of this station. He knew about the reports people put in, how horrid he had been to Chimney and Hen and how intimidating he had been towards Tommy in the past. And although he didn't hear what Gerrard had said tonight, he could see that both Tommy and Buck, possible even Chimney, had heard.
And then there was (Y/n), an impartial witness. Gerrard wasn't going to get away with what he'd said and the Chief was more than ready to have a private word with Bobby and Gerrard and reprimand him for this.
He had gotten a broken nose and a bruised ego from Tommy and that was just the start, he hadn't even had words with the Chief yet.
He got what he deserved.
Tommy shook and rolled his shoulders, cracking his spine into place while Bobby moved ahead of him to heave Gerrard to his feet. When Eddie patted his chest and gave him a polite nudge, Tommy nodded and turned towards (Y/n).
Before he had chance to open his arms, (Y/n) was already smothering herself into his chest. Her face buried in his chest, her nose brushing against the red ribbon his medal was hanging from and he could feel Minnie wriggling and whimpering between them. The newborn was upset, hungry and frightened and part of Tommy felt bad. He had started the fight and worried both his girls, but he couldn't have done anything else.
He couldn't help it. He never wanted Gerrard near (Y/n) in the first place. He had been glad that he met her just after he moved stations so he never had to introduce her and he only spoke about Gerrard in quick passing.
Somehow, Tommy didn't think his old Captain would be here today and he was beyond angry that he had turned up and decided to intimidate (Y/n) like that. He had done it because he knew she was Tommy's wife. That was the only reason he spoke to her.
"Come on." He murmured against the top of her head as he curved both arms around her and kept her close.
He began walking forward, guiding (Y/n) backwards until she turned to shuffle under his left arm so she didn't have to back track. Her eyes remained closed and Tommy's arms stayed around her as he headed towards the locker room. The only room that was vacant and out the way of the rest of the party that was slowly filling up with murmurs and questions and strange atmospheres.
Once the door shut behind them, Tommy moved over towards the lockers. He leaned his shoulders back up against them, slouched down and spread his legs so (Y/n) could stand between them.
"Are you okay?" He spoke against her hair, keeping his right arm curved around her waist while his other hand cupped the side of her face and tilted her head back so he could look down at her.
"Hm. I'm sorry-"
"Sorry? You didn't do anything, honey. Gerrard should have kept his fucking mouth closed and kept away."
Confusion and realisation washed over (Y/n)'s face all in one and she tried to look over her shoulder towards the party but she couldn't see any of the team anymore. Everyone was fluttering about and moving back towards the buffet and trying to have a dance and regain a light atmosphere again.
"That was Gerrard?" Now she knew why he had approached her and why he seemed keen to talk to her. He knew she was Tommy's wife; that was his motivation for speaking to her.
"Yeah. I hope he gets fired for this."
"Will you get in trouble?"
"Doubt it, Buck and Howie heard what he was saying to you, plus I'm off duty." If Tommy was on shift this would be a different matter entirely, but they couldn't suspend him or fire him or get him into a lot of trouble when he wasn't at work.
He pressed a longing kiss to her temple before he pushed forward and moved towards the bench. Tommy sat as far back on the bench as he could and spread his legs, grinning softly when (Y/n) smiled and took the hint, sitting between his thighs.
She felt his knees press into hers and his chest moulded around her back while his arms looped around her waist so his hands could spread out across her abdomen. The feeling of Tommy's chin on her shoulder made her shiver but in a good way and a warm, fuzzy feeling flooded her stomach when he kissed the side of her neck.
"I still need to feed her," (Y/n) whispered, although they were the only people in here and no one else in the party would be able to hear or see them. They were sat with their backs facing the glass wall and Tommy's frame moulded around her like a blanket. He was hiding her from any onlookers.
"Go ahead, honey." He murmured against her neck, taking the time to trail his fingertips up her waist causing her to shiver and shimmy in front of him. "No one can see or get past me."
His fingertips wormed up her side and his index and middle finger hooked around the strap on her shoulder. Slowly sliding it down her arm while his lips pressed wet, hot kisses down her neck and across her shoulder. He cradled the back of Minnie's head when (Y/n) settled her in place and his other arm tightened around (Y/n)'s waist, brushing his fingertips up and down her abdomen.
No one would be able to see them from here, all they would see was Tommy's back and the way he was slightly hunched forward. He completely blocked (Y/n) from view and if anyone tried to come in here, he would usher them away from his girls.
As far as Gerrard was concerned, Tommy hoped he would get fired or at least demoted for this.
(Y/n) prayed Tommy wouldn't get told off for what he'd done to Gerrard. Her man had gotten his medal today and his former Captain had gotten a broken nose.
They both got what they deserved.
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kozachenko · 3 months
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I FIGURED OUT A WAY TO FUCKING MAKE THE IMAGE SMALLER FOR POSTING ON TUMBLR WITHOUT SACRIFICING THE ACTUAL QUALITY OF THE IMAGE OH MY GOD
Ok so, what I did is go into the clip studio paint file, make a new file, copy and paste the group in the original file, merge everything, get rid of the extra stuff outside of the canvas, and then make the flattened image smaller and crop the canvas. Once you have that, export it and you're done. This helps maintain the actual quality of the image and also helps shrink the file size down to something actually postable (if anyone has a better way of doing this please tell me)
[Edit]: Ok I guess posting something to Tumblr just naturally compresses the image a bit more somehow because I'm looking at it now and zooming in too much makes it a bit blurry so I'm still gonna have to futz around with image quality for future pieces oof
Artist's Note:
I'm so glad I figured out a way to do this because I like working on a big canvas so I can get as much detail in as I possibly can. Only problems are how laggy it gets while drawing lol.
I had an idea for a drawing with Reimu and Zanmu because I really like thinking about their potential dynamic a lot. I also wanted an excuse to draw Zanmu again but in my normal rendering style because last time I drew her she was in my more sketchy style with generally flat colours so I wanted to draw her again. Speaking of, looking at the sketch for this is a jumpscare that I never enjoy seeing, like, man am I glad I didn't use those for my final piece.
Also about her spear. I was originally gonna make it like the ones she had in game, but it kinda threw off the whole piece. It was too big, too blue, and too flat, so I just went "fuck it" and gave her a different one instead. My headcanon justifying this is that the ones she uses in game are for danmaku battles whereas in any other fight she just uses a proper yari, or she still uses the yari and just makes it all glowy to power it up, maybe both lol. I pulled as much inspiration as I could from Sengoku era spears, and even put in some blue into the decorative part of the spear and also added a little skull to pay tribute to the original spear. Also, in my research I saw some art of izanami and izanagi making japan and saw that the yari izanagi has had a little decorative tassley thingy on it so I took some inspo from that and just made it one of Zanmu's tassles (Idk when that art was from or if the spear was still accurate to Sengoku period Japan but hey, probably the same reasons Eirin puts little bow ties on her arrows, it's just for personalization purposes).
I love rendering hair and clothes so much omg, while I like the super curly hair Zanmu, the longer, wavier hair suits her better for this drawing (I imagine it only does that like how Ghibli characters hair moves when they feel angry lol). I love making Zanmu's hair all messy and crazy, as well as giving her grey hairs, this woman has aged like a fine wine. Also, if the hem on the ends of her sleeves, top of her shirt, and her pants look like gold to you, that's because it is! It's fairly light so she's not collapsing under the weight, but it's gold! (I don't care how impractical it is, it's just cool). Not the undershirt though, it's made of a gold fabric. I had a cute idea with Reimu's hair to make it have a red shine to it. I also changed up Reimu's outfit so it isn't just a blob of red. I like it a lot when Reimu's skirt and outfit is segmented into different layers, so I wanted to incorporate that.
I tried to draw their hands differently as well, but IDK how noticeable that is. Also, I am super happy with how the side profiles for the two of them turned out, I used to struggle a lot with how to make the side profile of a character actually look like the character, so I'm really happy that they actually look like themselves.
Also added in the tree and rocks in the background as an homage to Zanmu's character art in Touhou 19, just because I was getting kinda stumped on what to do with the background lol.
In terms of a story idea with Reimu and Zanmu, idk why but the potential plotline of Zanmu wanting to ascend to godhood is so fascinating to me. Like, it is very possible that if she just convinced everyone she was a god (which would be very easy for her to do), she would become one in a heartbeat. Also, if she were to become a god, with her ability to return stuff to nothing, could she hypothetically get similar abilities to (Jojo Part 5 spoiler btw) GER? Like, idk about the death timeloop stuff, but the concept has been haunting me every night as I have been trying to find loopholes in GER's ability for a while now ( for no reason in particular). Back to the main topic, I imagine that she would probably tell Reimu that if she were to become a god she would take over the Hakurei shrine since the god there might as well be dead, and Reimu just says to her, "Over my dead body bitch." Like, I have no idea how to summarize their dynamic but like, it's the type of hero-villain dynamic where the phrase "We're not so different, you and I" would definitely be a phrase said during a fight. I think that if another IN style game were to release, Reimu and Zanmu would be in a team together. They could also have an interesting mentor and pupil kind of dynamic. Can you tell that Zanmu has been charging my mind rent these part few months? Like, instead of living in my head rent free, she kinda just uno reversed the whole situation and now she's the one charging me rent. What happens if I get evicted from my own brain? Actually, scratch that, I don't think I wanna know.
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februarybluues · 1 year
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idk if this is where I put requests I'm new to Tumblr 😭 but like I had an idea 🤓☝🏾can you write a story where the reader takes hobie roller skating and has to teach him because he's so horrible at it pleaseee
-M
i love this idea so much u have no idea . really hope i did it justice.
Roller-date.
warnings: cursing, gn reader, awful british, clumsy ass hobie
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look at him guys omg he's so drools
Although he insisted that he’d rather spend time with you at his house, you weren’t listening. You had your eye on the new roller-skating rink that opened up recently and you instantly knew you wanted to go. He was very much against the idea at first; ‘Capitalistic ideations’ and what-not. “We can just get our own skates ‘n go ‘round town. We don’t need’a spend money.”, he’d say, but you countered with “It’ll be fun! Don’t you want to spend quality time together? It’ll be like a fun roller-date!” you smiled at him, and he found himself sighing with defeat. How could he possibly say no to you? “Fine. Just this once.” 
And that’s how he ended up here; sitting down next to you on a bench - inside the rink, bright pink roller skates in his hands. “You sure they didn’t ‘ave any other colours?” he asked you, looking down to see you tying the laces on your skates – which matched his. “Nope. But, it’s too late now!” you giggled, and he groaned; definitely regretting his agreement to come in the first place, but at least you were happy. Once you finished putting your rollerskates on, you looked back to him and smiled. You quickly made eye contact, as he had admittedly been staring at you the entire time. “Are you gonna tie your laces or do you need me to do that for you?” you teased, effectively snapping him out of his thoughts. He rolled his eyes at you, before tying his laces. It was hilarious; his punk style clashed with the bright pink roller skates in a way that made you struggle to contain your laughter. “What’s so funny?” he asked you. You cleared your throat. “Nothing.” you muttered, still staring at his skates. You didn’t see the small smile plastered on his face. “Come on then.” he said, and you finally looked back up at him. “You ready?” you asked him, and he nodded. You stood up; careful to not fall over. He stayed on the bench, which made you quirk your eyebrow at him, confused. “Hobe? Are you alright?” you asked him, taking note of how he awkwardly sat there. He nodded at you; the once cocky smirk on his face was replaced with a subtle look of embarrassment. But he played it off well. “Fine. ‘M fine.” he said. “Then come on. Let’s get in the rink!” you smiled, and he scrambled to get up. At first, he opted for the ‘no-hands approach’; Attempting to stand up without his hands, to impress you. – which failed horribly. He slipped and landed back on the bench. Then, he tried to hold onto the arm of the bench to pull him up. It worked for a bit, but just as he finally stood up, his knees shook and he lost his balance, falling back onto the bench. You laughed quietly at his struggling, amused at the scene in front of you. “Hobie, can you not skate?” you asked him, genuinely. “Maybe I can’t. So what?” he didn’t look at you as he spoke. His lips were pouted and his brows were crossed with subtle anger and maybe a slight bit of embarrassment. You laughed, the situation was now making much more sense. The reason he didn’t want to skate was because he didn’t know how to! He scoffed at you, crossing his arms like an angry toddler. “I’m sorry- here.” you tried to stop laughing, and held your hand out to him, pulling him up as he grabbed onto it. It took him a minute to get his balance, but once he did he felt like the king of the world. “Want me to teach you how to skate?” you offered, smiling sweetly. “I’d love tha', doll.” he raised your hand to his lips and pressed a small kiss to it. “Firstly, let’s get in the rink.” you stated, slowly beginning to step towards it. A hand latched onto your arm before you could do so. “Wait! Don’t jus’ leave me ‘ere!” he all-but-shouted, clinging onto your arm. You laughed again at that. “Here. Just take tiny steps. Sort of like waddling- like a penguin.” you instructed, before demonstrating it to him. He copied your movements, before tripping over his own feet. You caught him before he hit the ground, pulling him back up. “Be patient with it. It’s not a race.” you said, slowly shuffling once again. After a while, he seemed to get the hang of things. And finally, you reached the rink. “Okay, this is going to be a lot slippier than the carpet, so be careful.” you warned him, before stepping into the rink. He nodded, slowly shuffling in. You were right. It was a lot more difficult to keep his balance, and he stumbled around quite a lot. - almost falling more than once. But eventually he did regain his balance. “This is easy.” he commented, growing a lot more confident. You let out a small laugh, before warning him again. “Don’t get too cocky. You’re gonna end up jinxing yourself.” He didn’t listen, holding onto the wall of the rink and using it to hold himself up.
You moved around, skating in semi-circles around him. He just looked at you as if you were a professional. “‘How are you doin’ tha’?” he asked. “Oh it’s easy! You just gotta push with your legs. - not too hard. But gently just push.” You instructed, giving him a demonstration as you spoke. You slowly skated around him, and he took multiple mental notes on what you were doing. The place wasn’t crowded, but it definitely wasn’t empty. There were a decent amount of people around the both of you. “Did that make sense?” you stopped in front of him. He nodded. “Like this?” he pushed his left foot backwards, and very slowly inched forward; still clinging onto the wall for dear life. “Uhh.. you’re getting there?” he scoffed at you. “Knew this was a bad idea.” he muttered almost inaudibly, but you heard it. “Hey! Once you get the hang of things I’m sure it’ll be fun. Stop being so negative.” you pressed a kiss to his forehead, and he playfully rolled his eyes.
You spent a while giving him a bunch of pointers and tips on how to skate, how to stop, and all of the basics. He just looked so lost the entire time. He listened intently, and asked some questions – which was very unlike him. When you commented on his sudden change in behaviour, he responded with “Jus’ wanna make sure you ‘ave fun. Teachin’ me all this isn’t all tha’ delightful, eh?” it was sweet of him, and it truly made your heart smile.
After around 20 minutes, you spoke up. “That’s pretty much all you need to know. Are you ready to try it out properly now?” “Prepare to be amazed,” he said, and you laughed. “By all means, show me what you’ve got.” he obliged, skating impressively well considering he had only learned moments ago. You applauded him, clapping your hands dramatically. “But can you let go of the wall this time?” he muttered something, sounding slightly hesitant. “O’course i can let go o’the bloody wall.” it was quiet, and you almost missed it. He slowly let go and held both arms out to stabilise himself. And then, he did it. He started to skate without the help of the wall. You felt like a proud mentor, quickly following behind him as he kept going. “Look at you go!” You smiled, and he looked at you with a cocky smile.
You did a few laps around the rink, hand-in-hand. His hand was squeezing yours with subtle uncertainty, and you gave him a small squeeze of reassurance. “You’re doing great.” “Oh ‘ell yeah. Bloody professional I am, yeah?” you chuckled, “The best of the best.”
He was doing great. He was a lot more confident than when he had started and had picked up the pace. But, he was almost too confident. “Watch this,” he said, before speeding up drastically and attempting to spin. But, about halfway through his attempt at spinning, he tripped over his own feet and landed on the cold ground. Understandably, you burst out into laughter at the situation. You couldn’t help yourself, okay? After a while, you crouched down next to him, carefully. “Are you okay?” you asked, and he looked away from you, embarrassed. “Meant to do that.” he excused himself, and you giggled. “Sure you did.” You then noticed the small rip in the knee of his jeans. This rip was not intentional, and you could see a small graze peaking through the fabric. “Baby, your knee.” you said, your hands moving to assess the injury. He swatted them away before you could see it properly. “Hey, hey. ’m fine. “ he said, but you ignored him, immediately moving your hands back to his knee. You moved the ripped fabric around so that you could see the injury. “Looks like a bit of rug burn. Poor thing.” you said, acknowledging how he subtly winced at your thumb grazing over it. “Jus’ a scratch. Like i said, ‘m fine. Dealt with worse.” “Are you sure? Does your ass hurt from falling on it?” you teased, laughing at your own words. “‘S not tha’ funny.” he murmured. “Oh come on. You have to admit it’s a bit funny.” “ Fine. Maybe jus’ a bit.” he admitted and you smiled, before standing up and holding your hand out to him.
“Let’s see if they have any plasters at the front desk.”
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omg heyyyy... so like, ive been wanting to make a normal taglist for all of my fics (not including series' tho they have separate taglists) so like lmk if you wanna be added pookie x
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hedgehog-moss · 4 months
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Inspired by your last ask! What are the best French books you’ve read that have no English translation yet? I read Play Boy and Qui a tué mon père (really loved the latter) last year and it feels so fun to read something that other Americans can’t access yet
I'm too nervous to make any list of the Best XYZ Books because I don't want to raise your expectations too high! But okay, here's my No English Translation-themed list of books I've enjoyed in recent years. I tried to make it eclectic in terms of genre as I don't know what you prefer :)
Biographies
• Le dernier inventeur, Héloïse Guay de Bellissen: I just love prehistory and unusual narrators so I enjoyed this one; it's about the kids who discovered the cave of Lascaux, and some of the narration is written from the perspective of the cave <3 I posted a little excerpt here (in English).
• Ces femmes du Grand Siècle, Juliette Benzoni: Just a fun collection of portraits of notable noblewomen during the reign of Louis XIV, I really liked it. For people who like the 17th century. I think it was Emil Cioran who said his favourite historical periods were the Stone Age and the 17th century but tragically the age of salons led to the Reign of Terror and Prehistory led to History.
• La Comtesse Greffulhe, Laure Hillerin: I've mentioned this one before, it's about the fascinating Belle Époque French socialite who was (among other things) the inspiration for Proust's Duchess of Guermantes. I initially picked it up because I will read anything that's even vaguely about Proust but it was also a nice aperçu of the Belle Époque which I didn't know much about.
• Nous les filles, Marie Rouanet: I've also recommended this one before but it's such a sweet little viennoiserie of a book. The author talks about her 1950s childhood in a town in the South of France in the most detailed, colourful, earnest way—she mentions everything, describes all the daft little games children invent like she wants ageless aliens to grasp the concept of human childhood, it's great.
I'll add Trésors d'enfance by Christian SIgnol and La Maison by Madeleine Chapsal which are slightly less great but also sweet short nostalgic books about childhood that I enjoyed.
Fantasy
• Mers mortes, Aurélie Wellenstein: I read this one last year and I found the characters a bit underwhelming / underexplored but I always enjoy SFF books that do interesting things with oceans (like Solaris with its sentient ocean-planet), so I liked the atmosphere here, with the characters trying to navigate a ghost ship in ghost seas...
• Janua Vera, Jean-Philippe Jaworski: Not much to say about it other than they're short stories set in a mediaeval fantasy world and no part of this description is usually my cup of tea, but I really enjoyed this read!
Essays / literary criticism / philosophy
• Eloge du temps perdu, Frank Lanot: I thought this was going to be about idleness, as the title suggests, and I love books about idleness. But it's actually a collection of short essays about (French) literature and some of them made me appreciate new things about authors and books I thought I knew by heart, so I enjoyed it
• Le Pont flottant des rêves, Corinne Atlan: Poetic musings about translation <3 that's all
• Sisyphe est une femme, Geneviève Brisac: Reflections about the works of female writers (Natalia Ginzburg, Virginia Woolf, Sylvia Townsend Warner, etc) that systematically made me want to go read the author in question, even when I'd already read & disliked said author. That's how you know it's good literary criticism
Let's add L'Esprit de solitude by Jacqueline Kelen which as the title suggests, ponders the notion of solitude, and Le Roman du monde by Henri Peña-Ruiz which was so lovely to read in terms of literary style I don't even care what it was about (it's philosophy of foundational myths & stories) (probably difficult to read if you're not fully fluent in French though)
Did not fit in the above categories:
• Entre deux mondes by Olivier Norek—it's been translated in half a dozen languages, I was surprised to find no English translation! It's a crime novel and a pretty bleak read on account of the setting (the Calais migrant camp) but I'd recommend it
• Saga, Tonino Benacquista: Also seems to have been translated in a whole bunch of languages but not English? :( I read it ages ago but I remember it as a really fun read. It's a group of loser screenwriters who get hired to write a TV series, their budget is 15 francs and a stale croissant and it's going to air at 4am so they can do whatever they want seeing as no one will watch it. So they start writing this intentionally ridiculous unhinged show, and of course it acquires Devoted Fans
Books that I didn't think existed in English translation but they do! but you can still read them in French if you want
• Scrabble: A Chadian Childhood, Michaël Ferrier: What it says on the tin! It's a short and well-written account of the author's childhood in Chad just before the civil war. I read it a few days ago and it was a good read, but then again I just love bittersweet stories of childhood
• On the Line, Joseph Ponthus: A short diary-like account of the author's assembly line work in a fish factory. I liked the contrast between the robotic aspect of the job and the poetic nature of the text; how the author used free verse / repetition / scansion to give a very immediate sense of the monotony and rhythm of his work (I don't know if it's good in English)
• The End of Eddy, Edouard Louis: The memoir of a gay man growing up in a poor industrial town in Northern France—pretty brutal but really good
• And There Was Light, Jacques Lusseyran: Yet another memoir sorry, I love people's lives! Jacques Lusseyran lost his sight as a child, and was in the Resistance during WWII despite being blind. It's a great story, both for the historical aspects and for the descriptions of how the author experiences his blindness
• The Adversary: A True Story of Monstrous Deception, Emmanuel Carrère: an account of the Jean-Claude Romand case—a French man who murdered his whole family to avoid being discovered as a fraud, after spending his entire adult life pretending to be a doctor working at the WHO and fooling everyone he knew. Just morbidly fascinating, if you like true crime stuff
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edvinception · 3 months
Text
Transcript of Edvin's radio interview
This is nowhere near perfect and not a word by word translation. BUt it took me over 2 hours so...
You owe me hahaha
Some discussions of season 3 and minor spoilers but nothing huge.
I: Edvin Ryding, it will soon be time for the third season of Young Royals, that's why we are here to talk about that among other things. I just have to start off- you arrive here blonde and with what looks like a racing jacket in orange, red, beige, lots of colours. 
E: Yes, I like it, I bought it this weekend when I was in Paris and walked past a Second-Hand Store where I found it and thought it was cool. There’s something a bit cool with stark colours and logos and with the blond hair. I’m at a phase where I need to experiment a bit I think. 
I: Yeah, because as Wilhelm in young royals you don’t, Wilhelm doesn’t want to stand out.  
E: In particular it’s the way he’s been raised. He is told what to wear and how to style his hair, how long his hair is allowed to be. You should look the part so to speak. Not standing out from the norms which is what the royal family wants to portray.  
I: In season 3 he says “I’m not allowed to cut my hair shorter” 
E: Exactly, he’s trapped in those norms. I remember when I tried to map Wilhelm down before season 1 I wrote down some of his interests and dreams. As soon as I did it I thought it was beautiful that he had these dreams, thoughts and interests but then I realised that he won’t be allowed to realise them, they will always remain vague interests. I’ve always thought of him as into fashion that’s into style but he’s stuck in history, traditions and expectation which is prominent in his whole life. In many ways, that’s what the series is about. That's the reason why he’s not allowed to cut his his hair shorter.  
I: Could you say he lives out through his love? 
E: Yeah, that's where he actually can’t resist anymore. These traditions and expectations have kept him from realising who he wants to be but when moves to Hillerska he meets Simon and realises this is a person I can be myself with, a person I’m in love with, oh wow I’m in love with him. And that becomes a catalyst for other parts of his life where he wants to be free and test his wings. 
I: And Simon can dress the way he wants and be more free. 
E: Exactly, he comes from a background where he’s allowed to be who he is with his family but when he comes to Hillerska with all those traditions he is also influenced by that and now in season three they have chosen each other and are a couple officially after the speech in season two. ANd that changes Simon's life too. He’s suddenly in the spotlight for the first time and is faced with new dilemmas with how he wants to handle things 
I: In preparation for season 1 you said you went through Wilhelm’s dreams, who it was and his limitations, the expectations on him and the rules he has to obey. What did this map look like? What was the big dream? 
E: The big dream was for him to have room to breathe and be free. I remember that Rojda Sekezöz who was conceptual director for season 1 and 2 asked us to write a diary entry from the first week of Hillerska and I wrote that Wilhelm dreams of having a good relationship with his family and his mum, for her to be only his mum. He dreams of being allowed to let loose. When we first meet him in season 1 he is kindof a party prince and that’s a way for him I believe to express the frustrations inside him that he has carried in all seasons but now in season 3 he actually lives out- He dreams of being free meets SImon and realise it’s possible. 
I: What about you Edvin? As an actor, have you changed in these seasons? It’s years of your life, You are young with alot going on but alot of things must have changed for you as an actor too? 
E: Yeah, you are right, it’s been a very live changing experience with the reach of the series and the fact that we got to make 3 seasons, alot of things have happened in my life. You are trying to find your identity and you you are. I’m very thankful for these 3 years with this show and these people. I’ve learned more than I could ever dream of from directors and all the actors. It’s been a privilege to be around what I believe is Sweden’s future in this industry. There are so many young and ambitious people. We have been free and learned so much from each other and also become very close. That’s what I will miss the most I think. 
I: Because this is the last season. 
E: Yeah it is the last season. 
I: Can you tell that you have developed as an actor. I think you can tell that you’ve gotten to know the environments, both as an actor and as the character. You are confident in some situations but also have pressure and expectations in others. Can you look at yourself from season 1 and then now in season 3 and think, “wow I’ve developed alot” 
E: Yeah, I would say that. I look back at scenes from season 1 and think “wow I’m so young” and how clueless I was. I thought I had everything under control but I’ve learned so much up until now. It was the first time I was the lead role. For a very big project and I was very nervous but Rojda was very caring and safe so she guided me. She’s not a a part of the final season but I feel like when I started working with new director that I felt alot more confident and trusted myself more. And that will get you very far as an actor. 
I: And you are meant to develop. It’s been three years. You are new at the school in the first season. Maybe it works out very well that you as an actor develop as the series does.  
E: Yeah, we’ve been shooting it for three years but the story itself takes place during one school year. But I’ve also realised that what these characters are going through in a school year is what most people experience in 3. SO it works our very well. 
I: This show has had exceptional reception. Netflix is talking about a worldwide success. You’ve already talked about this alot but how has it been for you recently? Howfrquently are fans in touch and how does it affect you? 
E: It affects me alot. In a good way. It becomes quite abstract and it’s hard to grasp it when you are on social media and sees a number. It’s hard to realise that these are real people. BUt then we’ve had opportunities where we got to meet people. When we were at Kimmy Fallon we met people and Omar had his own show with a big audience from across the world that we got to meet. Just now in Paris we met people. When you get to meet these people and they tell you what the series have meant for them and that they have met people across the world thanks to the series it feels powerful. I’m doing this because I want to move people with this artform. And with this project we’ve managed to do that. It’s huge.  
I: This will be with you your whole life, it’s a milestone. 
E: Definitely! 
I: BUt you were in Paris to talk about the show? 
E: No, I was in Paris for Fashion Week. There’s alot of love on social media, of course unpleasant people too and I have periods in my life where I can handle it better and periods where I’m not as good and when people around me get affected it’s harder for me to handle but I’ve kept away from social media for a bit. Now that I went to Paris it was because i wanted to and I didn’t share it on social media but people found me there anyway and wanted to talk. It was beautiful 
I: And the future? Do you get people contacting you from other countries asking you to be part of things? 
E: If only it was that simple! 
I: Not really, I’ve signed with an American agency in autumn 2021 and I’ve worked with them for a while now. That work continues and I talk about projects abroad continuously and they will come. I’m trying to not stress it. 
I: Sounds smart. 
E: I think so. To think sustainable. At the same time, the industry is very global and you can reach an international audience with stories from Sweden. It doesn’t hurt to do projects here that I want to do. At the end of the day it’s about the story, and portraying characters. It doesn’t matter where. It’s about working with talented people.  
I: Are you rich now?  
E: Yeah, I’m doing well money wise. Maths was never my subject so I struggle to be on top of that myself. 
I: But with the third season, were there opportunities to negotiate?  
E: Eh...I’m pleased with my economy. But of course, since this has been so successful you are in a better position to negotiate. But ti’s not about money for me. It’s never a factor in me saying yes or no to a project. 
I: We talked a bit about the US and reaching out with a story. But when it comes to acting, how do you improve apart from working on things, you’ve worked alot, the abyss among others. BY the way do you remember your first project on Svt? Mannen under trappan? 3x1 hours you told me. Do you remember? How old were you? 
E: I was five, I do remember parts of it. It was my parents that pitched me and handled everything. THey have always supported me in all my decisions. If I didn’t like it I didn’t have to do it. It’s supposed to be fun and feel right. I’m thankful for that and it carry it with me. Even if it was a dark story, it was a thriller, and Jonas Karlsson had schizophrenia, his character. I remember it s fun. There was a trampoline and we got candy when we worked at night. We played. We had a fantastic director that unfortunately is no longer with us, Daniel LInd Lagerlöf. He was great with us kids, it was me and Johanna Hintze that played the kids. I remember it as a fun experience. 
I: It made you want to do more? 
E: Yeah, evidently. 
I: About improving, and your tools as an actor, do you work on that? BY working? 
E: In a way you do...in recent years I’ve started to spend more time with the people I call the future of the industry. Actors from Royals...other co workers. I surround myself with people that are driven and ambitious and want to improve. It's a good thing because it makes me want to improve as well. You have drinks night and improvise scenes, it comes back to that naturally because everyone is so ambitious, You get inspiration right from the street. That woman for instance, she’s talking in her phone and she has 100 things going on in her life, she’s getting inside the car... things like that you pick up. You pick them up when you improvise and then you bring it along to set. It’s a craft which I love and die for. It’s amazing and you get obsessed with it. 
I: So Friday night, you and your friends, drinks and improvisation.  
E: Totally. You let loose. The people I surround myself are very driven and want to write their own things. Felicia Maxime comes to mind, we’ve done Young Royals, Avgrunden and A part of you together. Amazing actress, and also a script writer and director and very driven. She pushes me to let loose and improvise things. We can have coffee or drinks and brainstorm ideas and we can spend an hour in character and it’s wonderful. 
I: Do you write anything? 
E: I’ve gotten closer to that in recent ideas and have had ideas in my head that I write down. I recent year I’ve concretised them and written them down. It’s alot of fun but very hard. Then it’s good to have people around you that are experienced who I can learn from. I’m a person that puts alot of expectation on myself and can struggle to admit that I don’t know as much as the people around me and it’s been a process to get to a place where I can trust that I just need to learn more. 
I: To be vulnerable? 
E: Definitely. I feel like I’ve learned alot about that and that I can be vulnerable in private but in my working life it’s hard. It’s an industry with alot of expectation and pressure and you need to get picked. It’s not surprising that you try to be tough. But you get far by being vulnerable because it allows you to learn new things.  
I: You have alot of fans. People write about you and Omar, it’s intense, you’ve shot alot and you've been in other things as well. Is it hard to separate the private person Edvin and the actor Edvin? 
E: Yeah I’ve struggled with that. I think it’s because in season 1 alot of things happened and quite intensively and I had to create a character and as soon as Young Royals is brought up that character starts working. It was thar character that answered questions and used social media, all that. And they kinda merged which hit me just recently. It’s been hard to separate. It’s not surprising that you have these different persons. You have your business self and your social self but it’s important to separate for your ow mental health and I work on being able to do that. 
I: Do you have a bit to go to get there? 
E: Yeah I think so and that’s okay. I will be in different situations, that’s what I work with, to be different characters and I do with with alot investment. You give it your all and dives deeply. It will take a while but I need to accept that. 
I: So it’s the interview person here today. Not the private person Edvin? 
E: I think you’ve gotten a bit of a mix; I feel like. I’ve been quite open with some of my issues. Congrats.  
I: I have to say I got a bit surprise, seeing you in that Jacket from Paris, the blond hair and the trousers, it feels like you’ve toughened up. 
E. Maybe I have.That’s interesting... maybe I have. 
I: It’s only based in the image I have of you. I’ve met you once or so before. 
E: I’m in a period of my life where I... I’ve also grown up on set and it made me grow up faster than many other people my age and now I’m in a period of my life where I experiment and I’m the same vulnerable person on the inside and I’m very adamant about being open about my feelings and I think it's very important but I experiment more when it comes to the looks. 
They rambled about the weather at the end but I didn't include it.
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