#two lost souls who never had a chance and nowhere to go

[dlartistanon]

"How about you simply open yourself up to me, and allow me to search your heart?"

[edenesth]

TWTHH Spinoff: Until I Found You [1]

Pairing: prince!Yeosang x princess!reader

AU: historical au (Joseon era)

Word Count: 6.8k

Summary: It had been a while since Lady Park's firm rejection, and the fourth prince was beginning to believe he would never get over her. Though the heartbreak had made him more mature, one thing remained unchanged: his stubborn reluctance to marry. Convinced he would never find someone who could understand his pain as deeply as the general's wife, he was unprepared for the surprise life had in store for him—one that came in the form of a foreign princess.

A/N: As stated in the title, this is a spinoff. If you have yet to check out the main story, it's probably better to read that before starting this.

Main Story | Spinoff Masterlist | Part 2

"A peace treaty with Joseon? What do you think Father is going to offer them?" you wondered aloud, staring at your reflection in the ornate gold mirror as your mother gently combed your hair.

She sighed, her face filled with dread. "What else do you think, my dear? Another daughter, obviously. Lord have mercy on whichever poor soul has to be sacrificed."

Your fists clenched involuntarily, clutching the fabric of your robes at the thought. You couldn't imagine the horror: what if it was you? To be torn from your family, everyone you loved, everything you knew, and sent off to a foreign land to marry a complete stranger and live the rest of your life in isolation. "Mother, this is cruelty."

"This is reality, sweetheart."

You winced at her words. She was right, and you hated it. The mere thought of being separated from your mother, Royal Concubine Sarisu of Ruhon, was beyond unbearable. You were all she had, and she was everything to you.

Reaching for her hands, you squeezed them and smiled sadly up at her. Once, she had been the most favoured concubine, steadily climbing the ranks, poised to take the spot beside the then-empty throne. But then the current Her Majesty arrived. With her strong family ties and influential background, she immediately stole away all your mother's chances of ever becoming Queen.

But that wasn't all she stole.

She took everything, including all your father's affections, leaving him with no room for your mother or you. Since then, the two of you had been reduced to mere decorations in the grand palace of Ruhon, often labelled the rejects of His Majesty. You were invisible to him, merely waiting for the end of your days to come.

Neither of you were fools; you knew what people said about you both. But it didn't matter. You were grateful not to be starving on the streets and to still have a roof over your heads, even if it was nowhere near as luxurious as the Queen and her children's chambers. No matter how much favour your mother had lost, at least the King was still kind enough to let you both keep your titles and everything else.

Or was he really?

Perhaps you shouldn't have spoken about it. Now, you had jinxed it. You should have known, should have realised why he had kept you around. You had your own uses and were finally coming in handy now. The realisation struck when a eunuch rushed into your chambers, which was an unusual occurrence, bowing lightly—nothing like the deep bows usually reserved for other royals.

"Princess Sarisu, you have been summoned by His Majesty the King and are expected in the throne room this instant," he announced, gesturing towards the exit. "Please allow me to escort you there."

He let out a small, impatient huff when you remained frozen in your spot, exchanging horrified looks with your mother. "Come now, Your Highness. We mustn't upset His Majesty any further."

She cleared her throat, nodding encouragingly despite her trembling hands. "Go on, my dear. I'm sure it's nothing, hm? Maybe your father simply wishes to catch up." Not wanting her to worry, you forced a smile. "Yes, Mother. You're probably right."

You weren't sure who you were trying to convince with those foolish white lies, but a part of you clung to the hope that was all it was. With that, you followed the eunuch towards the throne room.

The palace corridors seemed colder, the shadows darker, as you walked. Each step echoed ominously, amplifying the anxiety churning in your stomach. You could feel the eyes of courtiers and servants on you, their whispers adding to the tension.

Finally, you reached the grand doors of the throne room. They loomed before you, heavy and imposing. The eunuch pushed them open, revealing the vast chamber within. At the far end, on the elevated throne, sat your father, the King. His expression was stern, his gaze piercing as it settled on you.

"Approach," he commanded, his voice resonating through the hall.

You walked forward, your heart pounding in your chest. As you neared the throne, you dropped to your knees, bowing deeply. "This princess greets Your Majesty," you greeted, your voice trembling despite your efforts to remain composed.

Your father studied you for a moment before speaking, "I hope you have been well, princess. I will not bother beating around the bush; you are at the perfect age for marriage, and it is time you fulfil your duty. The peace treaty with Joseon has been finalised. It has been decided that you are to be sent as part of the agreement. We leave in a week to celebrate your future union with Ninth Prince Yeochan."

The words struck you like a blow. Your worst fears had come true. You were to be sacrificed for the sake of the kingdom, sent away to a foreign land to marry a stranger. Your mind raced, struggling to process the reality of your fate.

Oh god, it's really happening... to me.

"Father, please..." you began, but he raised a hand, silencing you.

"Look at me, princess. This is not a question, it's an order," he commanded, his gaze steely and unyielding despite your tear-filled eyes. You were bewildered; you were merely the daughter of a concubine. It was usually only princesses born from the Queen who had to marry for the nation's sake.

"But Father—" you fell to your knees, prepared to beg for mercy.

He snarled, "No buts! Your sisters are too young for this. Her Majesty and I have deliberated long and hard. You're the only one fit for the task. You'll do well to make your mother proud. I know you're upset about leaving her behind, but you're a princess, and you know what that means. Your sacrifice will save Ruhon…"

Yes, from your reckless decisions.

If only he hadn't rashly launched a sudden attack on Joseon, none of this would have happened. Peace would have prevailed, and you wouldn't have to be offered as a pawn in the war he instigated. You weren't stupid; he was giving you up because this was a deal with the enemy. The Queen's daughters were too precious to be sent away.

"Oh, come now, my daughter. Just be grateful you aren't marrying the dreadful fourth prince of Joseon. I'm sure their ruler still has some conscience. You'll be fine."

Easy for you to say, Father...

One week. That was all the time you were given to come to terms with your fate—to be the chosen pawn sent to Joseon, to spend these final days with your mother before departing forever. Reality wasn't cruel; your father was. You had never harboured such profound hatred for him as you did now. Oh, your poor mother. How would she endure the emptiness of the palace alone? Your heart ached with the mere thought of her grieving in the cold confines of your shared chambers, her life overshadowed by your absence.

Though you faced a grim future, perhaps far worse than hers, all you could think about was the one person who meant everything to you—the one who had brought you into this world, nurtured you, protected you, and showered you with endless love. And now, you were leaving her behind forever.

The days blurred together in a haze of sorrow and apprehension. You clung to your mother, finding solace in shared memories and whispered reassurances. The palace, once your sanctuary, now felt like a gaol, each room a reminder of the departure that loomed ahead.

On the final night, she held you tightly, her voice trembling with unshed tears. "You are strong, my dear. Remember that. No matter what happens, hold on to who you are. Go and make us all proud."

You nodded, tears mingling with hers. "I will, Mother. I promise. Don't worry about me and take good care of yourself."

The next morning arrived far too soon. As you prepared to leave, you took a last, lingering look around your chamber, memorising every detail. Then, with a heavy heart, you followed the royal guard sent to escort you. Walking through the palace corridors for the final time, the weight of your destiny pressed heavily upon you.

At last, you reached the courtyard where the grand carriage awaited. Your father stood beside it, his face a mask of indifference. He offered no words as you approached, only a curt nod. "Come, let us go."

With one final, sorrowful glance at your mother, you climbed into the carriage. As it began to move, you watched her silhouette grow smaller and smaller until she was nothing more than a distant memory.

Thus, you set off towards an uncertain future, your heart heavy with grief and dread, knowing you were leaving behind everything you had ever known and loved.

Goodbye, Ruhon... goodbye, Mother.

"Your Highness, how should we announce you at the banquet?" the King of Joseon asked, smiling warmly down at you.

Your father straightened up proudly beside you, about to answer on your behalf, but you quickly bowed. "Please announce me as Princess Sarisu, Your Majesty, as I have always been known in Ruhon."

The Joseon ruler's eyes widened slightly at the realisation. "Ah, so this is the famous Royal Concubine Sarisu's only daughter. That explains your exceptional beauty. And here, we assumed a princess from Her Majesty of Ruhon would be offered to us." It was a subtle jab at your father, who had thought he could deceive the court by presenting you as a Crown Princess.

Your father's smile was steely, masking the fury that boiled inside him. He trembled with anger at your betrayal—exposing your true identity by using your mother's name, despite his stern reminder that you were to pose as one of the Queen's daughters.

Call it your little revenge if you will.

"No matter, Father. I consider myself fortunate to be matched with such a beauty. After all, I, too, am a son of a concubine. We are quite the match," said Prince Yeochan, your betrothed, as he bowed respectfully to his father and yours. His words might charm most, but you doubted their sincerity. Living in a palace, you had seen your share of false pleasantries and performative kindness.

The King of Joseon nodded approvingly. "As you should be, Ninth Prince. I expect you to treat your future wife well. Now let us adults discuss the wedding plans. You may show your fiancée to her temporary quarters."

"Yes, Father," the young prince responded, then approached you, offering his arm. "Come, my princess."

Despite the grandeur of your reception, it was clear that the welcome was more for show than genuine warmth. This became evident when you arrived at your assigned quarters, a small and secluded part of the palace, far from the bustling main areas where the rest of the royal family and court members congregated.

"Thank you, Your Highness, for showing me here," you said politely.

At that moment, the facade of the dutiful son vanished. Yeochan smirked humourlessly. "Save it. It doesn't matter if you're the daughter of a concubine or the Queen; you're still Ruhon scum to me. Don't think that just because you're here showing me your faux politeness, you can fool me. I don't trust you, princess," he spat.

You sighed, your shoulders slumping. There it was, his true nature revealed. Not that you hadn't anticipated this. Given the history between your nations, it was inevitable. You were the princess from the country that had dared to attack his own, a symbol of betrayal and defeat, delivered to their doorstep after your father's cowardly surrender. You could have argued, defended yourself, but it was clear there was no point. His hatred was deep-rooted and unwavering.

The ninth prince huffed at your silence. "I'll make this clear: you will do well to cooperate and play the perfect couple with me in public. But do not expect anything when we're alone. You are nothing more than a political pawn in this game. Remember that."

You met his gaze, your own eyes steady and resolute. "I understand, Your Highness. I will fulfil my duty as expected."

He sneered, turning on his heel and leaving you alone in your sparse quarters. As the door closed behind him, the reality of your situation settled over you like a heavy shroud. The grandeur of the palace felt hollow, a gilded cage in which you were now imprisoned.

Tears threatened to spill, but you blinked them back, refusing to succumb to despair. You had to be strong, for your mother, for yourself. No matter how cold and unwelcoming this place was, you would endure. You had no other choice.

I'll be fine, Mother... I'll live.

The rest of the day had been spent wandering aimlessly within your quarters. The thought of dining with your father was unbearable; after the stunt you had pulled earlier, you dreaded to think what he might say or do. So, you remained secluded in your room, staring at the miserable meal the palace maids had brought you.

Their reluctance to serve you had been apparent. A few bolder ones had whispered about you not so discreetly, their words cutting through the fragile composure you were trying to maintain. Feeling the tension and disdain in the air, you had dismissed them, preferring solitude over their barely concealed contempt.

Staring at the plain bowl of rice and a few meagre side dishes, your appetite vanished. You knew enough about Joseon to recognise that this meal was far from a luxury. It was a clear message: you were not welcome here, not valued, not respected.

Heaving a deep sigh, you thought of your poor mother. How was she coping with your absence? Was she as lonely and lost as you felt in this foreign place? The ache of missing her was a constant, gnawing pain, a reminder of everything you had been forced to leave behind.

As night fell, the shadows in your room grew longer, mirroring the gloom that settled over your heart. The palace, with all its splendour, felt like a prison. The heavy silence pressed down on you, amplifying the sense of isolation. You were a stranger in an enemy land, alone and uncertain of the future.

But you knew you had to endure.

For your mother, for your people, and most importantly, for yourself. No matter how bleak the present seemed, you clung to a glimmer of hope. Perhaps, in time, you would find a way to navigate this treacherous path and carve out a place for yourself in this unforgiving world. Until then, all you could do was survive, one day at a time.

You had gone to bed with a heavy heart, fully aware that this was now your reality, and nothing could change it. A part of you was determined to make the best of your situation despite the hostility you faced. Perhaps it was the adrenaline and emotional exhaustion from the day that allowed you to fall asleep without much trouble on your first night in this foreign land.

The following morning, you were awakened by the same group of maids assigned to you. They were there to bathe and dress you, and knowing you had no choice but to comply, you obediently allowed them to do as they pleased. You endured every harsh tug and rough handling without a single complaint as they prepared you for the day.

"Thank you, you may go," you said, dismissing the group of maids as soon as they had finished their task. Sitting in front of the mirror, you took in your new appearance. It was a sobering reminder that you were about to be a princess of Joseon. The foreign hanbok and hairdo, though simpler and less dramatic than Ruhon's style, were beautiful in their own right.

You reached a hand behind to stroke the single gold hairpin tucked into the neat low bun on your head, then moved down to touch the smooth lavender fabric now adorning your body. "Hmm, not bad at all," you murmured to yourself.

Despite the simplicity, there was a quiet elegance to the attire. The colours were soft and soothing, a stark contrast to the vibrant and intricate garments you were accustomed to. You could see yourself getting used to these outfits. This was your new reality, and you were determined to find beauty and strength in it, no matter how challenging the circumstances.

With a deep breath, you rose from your seat and steeled yourself for the day ahead. You knew it wouldn't be easy, but you resolved to face whatever came your way with grace and resilience. Knowing that no one, especially not your fiancé, would show you around the palace grounds, you resolved to explore the place on your own. With the banquet scheduled for the next night, you had this day to yourself. What better way to spend it than embarking on a little adventure?

Finally free from the pressure and the sensation of walking on eggshells, you wandered the palace grounds with awe. The buildings and their architecture were new and different, capturing your attention at every turn. You nodded politely at any passing palace staff who, despite their reluctance or displeasure, still greeted you with courtesy. Your attire signified your status, and rules were rules; they couldn't possibly ignore you in broad daylight.

Amid your exploration, you stumbled upon what seemed to be a tranquil cherry blossom garden. Though the flowers were not in bloom, you could imagine how breathtaking this place would be in the right season. You made a mental note to return when the cherry blossoms were in full glory.

Deciding to take a walk inside, you were unprepared for the sight that greeted you. In one of the many pavilions, diligently practising calligraphy, was a figure that resembled a celestial being. The scene was almost ethereal: the serene garden, the elegant strokes of the brush, the calm concentration on the person's face.

Could he be a scholar...?

Your breath caught in your throat. The figure was dressed in simple yet refined garments. The rhythmic movements of the brush were mesmerising, each stroke deliberate and graceful. You couldn't help but feel as though you were intruding upon a sacred moment. But you couldn't turn away as you moved closer, recognising the poem being written.

"Is that Hwaseoljedeungnubu by Shin Sukju?" you asked softly.

At your question, the person's head whipped up. It took him a moment to respond, but he did eventually. "Yes, it is."

You nodded in approval, a small smile on your lips, pleased that he had yet to frown or react negatively as most people had so far. "Nice penmanship, by the way."

He cleared his throat, slightly flustered. "Thank you."

To say that Yeosang was surprised would be the understatement of the century. Only the most highly educated individuals could recognise this series of poems exchanged between Joseon officials and Ming Dynasty envoys. He wouldn't have been surprised if even most low-ranking officials were not well-versed in this.

First of all, you were a woman, and most women, despite being educated, did not study these texts. Secondly, you were clearly not local; your accent gave that away. Were you perhaps a visiting guest here for the banquet celebrating the union with Ruhon?

But above all else, did you... not know who he was? Even if you didn't, most people turned away as soon as they spotted the dreadful red mark beside his left eye, which was not hard to miss.

When you bit your lip earnestly and stepped into the pavilion, asking, "Do you mind if I join you?" The fourth prince furrowed his brows and placed down his brush, lifting his head to look at you properly, giving you a clear view of his birthmark.

"Are you certain, my lady? Why would you want to sit with me?"

You blinked, confused by the question. "I-I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I don't understand—"

He sighed, pointing at the mark on his face. "Do you not see this?"

You nodded slowly, still lost. "Yes, and?"

His brows flew up at your nonchalant response, and he took a deep gulp. "What—are you not disgusted?"

You frowned. "That's a strong word, but... am I supposed to be? By what exactly?"

He finally gave in, taking a moment to process the fact that standing before him was someone who did not see anything wrong with him—the second person to do so after Lady Park. He motioned to the seat opposite him. "Please, have a seat."

You smiled gratefully and settled across from him. He waited for you to be seated before beginning his introduction. "I apologise for my unusual questions. I… I'm Yeosang, the Fourth Prince of Joseon."

He held his breath as your eyes widened in realisation, bracing himself for the rejection he was so accustomed to. But it didn't come. Instead, your lips formed a small pout as you observed him. "So, you're the famous Fourth Prince Yeosang… I don't get it."

He chuckled in bewilderment. "What don't you get, my lady?"

"Why do they call you dreadful? I've only been here for a day and a half, met a handful of people, and you're the first and only one to treat me with equal respect. Besides, you're… very attractive. I don't understand why they'd call you—" Your eyes landed on the birthmark. "Ah, so that's why…"

He nodded solemnly, trying not to show how much it affected him. "Yes, all because of this one stupid mark."

You pursed your lips. "Well, if it's worth anything, I think you're beautiful. People can be cruel for no reason. Trust me, I know."

For the first time in forever, the fourth prince broke into a genuine grin. "Thank you, I… I think you're beautiful too."

You grew shy at that, and wanting to break the ice, Yeosang picked up his brush, handing it to you. "Now, you must tell me how you know about Shin Sukju and his poems. Also, which is your favourite?"

For the remainder of the afternoon, he refrained from asking about your identity, and you were grateful for it. You feared he might distance himself if he learned of your betrothal to his brother, and the thought unsettled you. After all, finding a genuine friend was rare and precious, and you wished to cherish this fleeting moment of sincerity. You knew that by the next day, at the banquet, everyone, including Yeosang, would eventually discover who you truly were.

But you pushed that worry from your mind.

Just for now...

Your time together was cut short when the prince had classes to attend and could no longer stay. As he packed up his things and prepared to leave the pavilion, he turned to you. "Will you be at the banquet tomorrow?"

You swallowed and nodded, offering a small smile. "Yes, I'll be there."

His face lit up with a beaming smile. "Great! I’ll see you there, my lady."

You rose from your seat and bowed. "See you, Your Highness."

Once Yeosang had departed, you sank back into your seat, lost in contemplation. So this was the prince your father had told you you were fortunate not to be wed to? Of course, you knew that if you had been matched with him, he might not have been as courteous as he had been today. Before arriving in Joseon, you had heard nothing but unflattering remarks about him. He was rumoured to be a rebellious brat, the least appealing prince among his brothers.

Yet, meeting him in person, you found the reality strikingly different.

Sure, the rebellious reputation might have some truth, but people can change. As for the claim of his being unappealing, you couldn't fathom how a mere birthmark could diminish his allure. In your eyes, Yeosang was extraordinarily handsome, and the mark only seemed to enhance his unique charm.

Could it be that you were developing a small crush on your soon-to-be brother-in-law? Maybe so, but who could blame you? His kindness, coupled with his striking appearance, made it nearly impossible not to feel some affection. Perhaps it was this harmless little infatuation that provided a semblance of comfort and sanity amidst the turmoil of your new life.

You allowed yourself a small, wistful smile. For now, you would hold on to this tender feeling, as it was one of the few bright spots in the otherwise daunting reality you faced.

Heh, a silly little crush wouldn't hurt.

After the royal tutor had left, the fourth prince found himself alone in the library, a satisfied smile tugging at his lips as he gazed at the parchment before him. Your handwriting, delicate yet confident, adorned the page. He was thoroughly impressed by your breadth of knowledge, especially given that you were a foreigner. You had shared with him your passion for the liberal arts and how you had delved into them in your home library. It was refreshing to meet someone so genuinely curious and non-judgmental. You were a rare find in a world often quick to judge and dismiss.

His anticipation for the banquet grew, eager to continue your intellectual exchange and perhaps learn even more from you. This fleeting joy, however, was interrupted by a familiar voice.

"You seem to be in high spirits, my prince. Could it be because of the banquet? You've heard the news, haven't you?" Royal Secretary Choi's voice interrupted his thoughts. As he looked up, his smile faltered slightly upon meeting the secretary's inquisitive gaze.

"Heard? About what?" Yeosang inquired, his brows knitting together.

"Wait… you haven't? General and Lady Park will be attending. Last time we spoke, you mentioned wanting to see her, didn't you?" San replied, his tone laced with curiosity.

The mention of Lady Park swiftly altered his mood. Thoughts of your newfound friendship evaporated, overshadowed by the grim realisation. Although he had reconciled with the fact that she would never be his, the prospect of seeing her again—now pregnant and with her husband—was a painful reminder of his loss. The thought of facing them, of witnessing their happiness, stirred a deep unease within him. Was he truly prepared for this?

"I see. Thank you for the information, Secretary Choi. I'll see you at the banquet tomorrow," Yeosang said, gathering his belongings and leaving for his chambers. He needed solitude to grapple with the revelation and to ready himself for the emotional challenge ahead.

"We'd like to extend our gratitude to all distinguished guests here today to celebrate the union between Joseon and Ruhon. May I present to you the match that will make all of this possible: our very own Ninth Prince Yeochan and the beautiful Princess Sarisu of Ruhon. Their Highnesses will be officially wed in a month. Now, let us all use this opportunity to congratulate the new couple on their impending marriage and wish them an eternity of happiness," the King of Joseon announced.

Oh. There she is.

Yeosang blinked. There you were, standing before the assembled guests. Indeed, you were present. And, of course, you were the Ruhon princess sacrificed for the peace treaty. The puzzle pieces began to fit together. That explained your knowledge and undeniable class—qualities far beyond those of any mere noblewoman. He supposed he shouldn't have been too surprised.

As if on cue, you turned and met his gaze. Your eyes widened slightly upon seeing him, your expression turning guilty. You opened your mouth, ready to mouth an apology, but before you had the chance, a tap on his shoulder quickly shifted his attention.

Likewise, your fiancé cleared his throat, sensing your distraction. He murmured in your ear, "Focus, princess. Don't you dare embarrass me." You blinked and nodded. While people on the outside might coo and assume the Ninth Prince was a loving fiancé, only you know the reality behind his facade.

"There you are, my prince!" the royal secretary called out. "The general and his wife are just over there," he informed, nodding toward the area where the couple could be seen. Seonghwa was deep in conversation with his handpicked military strategist, General Officer Song, while his wife was engaged in a chat with one of the royal physicians nearby.

Yeosang's breath hitched as soon as his eyes landed on the pregnant woman. In an instant, all thoughts of you and the revelation of your identity as the foreign princess meant to marry his brother vanished. All he could see and think about was the general's wife. It was the first time he had seen her since her wedding with General Park, and she looked… beautiful, as always. In fact, she seemed even more beautiful now, glowing with the radiance of motherhood.

Oh god, he realised he was still far from getting over her. Would he ever get over her? He didn't know, but for now, just for now, he needed to talk to her.

Taking a deep breath, he started toward her, his heart pounding with every step. As he approached, her laughter reached his ears, a sound that once brought him immense joy and now brought a bittersweet ache. It took her a moment to notice him, needing the royal physician she was speaking with to signal his presence. Her eyes widened in surprise when she turned to see him, starting to bow, but he stopped her before she could do so.

"It's been a while, my lady. Would you... care to catch up?" he asked.

She bit her lip, turning to meet her husband's warm gaze. The general nodded, indicating the decision was hers. Turning back to face the prince, she beamed. "Of course, Your Highness. Shall we talk over some snacks? Pregnancy cravings, you know," she joked, and he agreed, guiding her to the refreshments table.

"So, how have you been?" Yeosang asked, his voice laced with a mix of hope and sorrow.

"I've been well, thank you," she responded, her hand instinctively moving to rest on her belly. "And you? How have you been?"

He hesitated, searching for the right words. "I've been… managing. It's good to see you looking so well."

She smiled again, a hint of sadness in her eyes. "It's good to see you too, Your Highness. I heard you've been doing well with your studies and your duties."

The fourth prince nodded, unable to tear his gaze away from her. "Yes, I've been keeping busy." He paused, taking a deep breath. "I just wanted to say… congratulations. You look radiant."

"Thank you," she said softly, her smile genuine. "It means a lot coming from you."

He gulped, pausing briefly before meeting her eyes. "You are happy, aren't you? The general... he's treating you well, yes?" He knew that San had already assured him of this once, but he needed to hear it from her to be fully convinced, to properly let go.

The lady softened and nodded. "I am, my friend. I feel like the happiest woman on earth. I assure you, you don't have to worry about me. And yes, my husband is very good to me. I promise you, I'm telling the truth," she added with a hint of jest.

"That's good. That's all that matters to me, my lady. Promise me you'll invite me over once the baby's born," the fourth prince said, despite the light ache in his chest.

"Of course, Your Highness! You'll be the first I'll invite!" she replied, laughing warmly.

The two exchanged a few more words, their conversation unknowingly catching most people's eyes in the hall, given their well-known history. For those craving drama, it was slightly anticlimactic to see the two get along so well. While the King and Queen exchanged proud smiles, the ninth prince was less than pleased, again overshadowed by his elder brother. Even on his special day, Yeosang managed to steal the spotlight.

The fourth prince sensed all eyes on him, growing slightly self-conscious. He wasn't clueless; he hadn't been naive enough to ignore that his failed attempt to win General Park's wife had been the talk of the palace. People weren't scrutinising him merely for his birthmark and rebellious tendencies anymore, but also for his brave yet foolish pursuit of a taken woman—one who belonged to one of the most intimidating and feared individuals in all of Joseon.

Knowing it was time to make himself scarce, he took one last, long look at the lady he still held feelings for, reminding himself it was time to truly let go. She was happy, with child, about to build a family with her husband. It was wrong for him to still feel this way.

"I wish you happiness, my lady. May you have a safe delivery, and I look forward to meeting your mini you," he said, his voice tinged with genuine warmth and a lingering sorrow.

She giggled softly, nodding. "Thank you, my prince. I wish you all the happiness in the world as well."

With that, Yeosang finally bid the lady goodbye, not forgetting to shoot the general a grateful nod before making his way out of the hall. He needed somewhere quiet to organise his thoughts and emotions. As he walked away, the murmurs and whispers of the court followed him, a stark reminder of the weight of his actions and the expectations placed upon him.

Reaching a secluded garden within the palace grounds, now adorned with lanterns hanging from the trees as part of the celebration, he allowed himself to breathe deeply, the cool night air filling his lungs. The moonlight cast gentle shadows, and the lanterns emitted a soft glow, while the distant sounds of the banquet faded into the background. Alone with his thoughts, he closed his eyes, letting the reality of the situation wash over him.

He had seen her happiness, her radiant glow as an expectant mother, and it brought him a strange sense of peace. It was time to move forward, to let go of the past, and to find his own path to happiness.

Taking one last deep breath, he straightened up, a newfound resolve settling within him. It was time to face the future, whatever it might hold, with a heart unburdened by past regrets.

Time to move on, Kang Yeosang...

The night had never felt longer than it did now as you sat wearily beside your fiancé. You observed with curiosity as Prince Yeosang conversed with the beautiful Lady Park, catching the gossip from two palace maids nearby. So this was the woman who held the fourth prince's heart and was the reason for his significant change.

Love, indeed, was a strange force, altering people as soon as they were struck by its powerful emotions. You wondered if you would ever experience such feelings. But glancing to your left at your soon-to-be husband, you doubted it would ever happen. From here on, everything was merely a duty—this marriage, this commitment.

At some point, you noticed that Yeosang was no longer in sight. Ah, to leave as you please must be a luxury. Like him, you, too, would rather be anywhere but here. But with no choice, you remained seated, playing the role of the perfect fiancée to the ninth prince.

Nearing the end of the banquet, the overwhelming presence of false kindness around you became unbearable. Turning to Prince Yeochan, you forced a smile. "Your Highness, it seems the event is drawing to an end. I am feeling rather fatigued. May I please excuse myself?"

He turned to you, and you could see the effort it took for him not to roll his eyes as he too forced a grin. "Of course, love. Anything for my princess," he said, loud enough for his father to hear.

The King of Joseon nodded approvingly. "Go, my dear. The ninth prince shall attend to the remaining guests."

With a grateful bow, you departed, ignoring the searing gaze of your father on your back. You had avoided interacting with him all night; his presence made you sick to the core. If having a father meant having one like him, you would rather have none at all. You couldn't wait for him to leave, not wanting to see him any longer.

As soon as you were out of the hall, you dismissed the maids escorting you, preferring to be alone and sparing them the burden of accompanying the hated Ruhon princess. With a sigh of relief, your shoulders slumped, finally feeling a sense of freedom. You began walking aimlessly, letting your feet guide you wherever they pleased. Though you knew your way back to your quarters, you had no desire to return to that cage just yet. You needed fresh air, a moment of peace.

Your eyes sparkled in wonder when you stumbled upon a beautiful garden area illuminated by lanterns. The soft glow of the lanterns cast gentle shadows, creating a magical atmosphere. You paused, taking in the sight, feeling a sense of calm wash over you. The night air was cool and refreshing, a stark contrast to the stifling atmosphere of the banquet hall.

Wandering deeper into the garden, you savoured the solitude. The sounds of the banquet faded into the distance, replaced by the rustling of leaves and the soft chirping of crickets. The garden felt like a sanctuary, a place where you could temporarily escape the expectations placed upon you.

Your breath hitched when you finally spotted a familiar figure sitting by the cobblestone ledge, facing a small pond. Carefully, you stepped towards him, unsure. Hearing your footsteps, he turned, causing you to freeze. With a small chuckle, he gestured to the spot beside him.

"Oh, hey there. Take a seat, princess." Your heart skipped a beat at the way he addressed you, genuine and without sarcasm, unlike your fiancé. And so you did, settling down beside him cautiously.

You swallowed nervously, avoiding his gaze, and asked in a whisper, "Aren't you angry with me, Your Highness? For deceiving you?"

He raised a brow in surprise and replied, "Why would I be, princess? Technically, I never inquired about your identity, and you haven't told me any lies. There is nothing for you to feel bad over, and absolutely no reason for me to be displeased. If anything, I'm quite happy to learn that you'll be staying here. You know, it's not often I encounter someone with a mind as exceptional as mine," he added with a teasing smile, giving you a gentle nudge on the shoulder.

A laugh escaped you, and you turned to face him, your heart fluttering at the sight of his warm and pretty smile. He extended his hand towards you. "Friends?"

You hesitated only for a moment before placing your hand in his. "Friends."

As you sat side by side, a tranquil silence enveloped you both. The gentle glow of lanterns bathed the garden in a soft, ethereal light, while the quiet murmurs of the pond added a serene backdrop to the moment. The moonlight shimmered on the water, creating a magical and soothing atmosphere.

You stole a glance at him, a genuine smile gracing your lips. For the first time since your arrival, the oppressive weight of loneliness seemed to lift. His presence beside you brought a sense of calm and companionship that had been sorely missing.

Perhaps, after all, being here wasn't so bleak. The evening's initial discomfort had given way to a blossoming connection. As you shared this peaceful moment, you couldn't help but think that this might be the start of something truly significant—a genuine friendship. The idea of finding someone who truly understood and accepted you kindled a warm hope in your heart.

I think I'll be just fine here, Mother.

« Preview of Part 2 »

"Thank you, my King," the mother of the nation murmured softly, holding her husband's hand as they settled into bed.

His Majesty raised an eyebrow, glancing at her with curiosity. "For what, my wife?"

The Queen sighed, her gaze distant. "For not forcing the fourth prince into this arranged marriage. I was afraid you might do so as part of his punishment, to settle him down once and for all."

The ruler of Joseon exhaled deeply. "I won't deny it, my Queen. I did consider it. But then I remembered Lady Park's words—he has endured enough already. It's my fault he became the man he is. I have not been the father he needed, and the least I can do now is honour his wishes, even if it means he chooses not to marry."

Her Majesty nodded, her voice gentle. "I have not been the best mother either. But perhaps it is time we make amends. This decision is for the best."

"It is," the King agreed, his tone resolute.

Surprise!! Didn't think I'd update on a Wednesday but long story short, I got injured and am on medical leave today. So, I figured, why not use this time to write? HAHA

As always, thank you for reading and let me know your thoughts! <3

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[bonny-kookoo]

Jungkook

𝐔𝐍𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄 | Acceptance

Sometimes, accepting that your past is yours is the hardest thing to do.

Tags/Warnings: Alien!Jungkook, Human!Reader, dystopian AU, space/Sci-fi/cyberpunk-esque, Enemies to lovers, Angst, Violence, Drama, romance, adult, angst, potentially triggering content, mentions of prostitution, this one's a little heavy, Hurt and comfort

Length: uuuuh 3k-ish.

There is no taglist for this fic.

-> Masterlist

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Considering he knew that you'd figure it out sooner rather than later, he's honestly a little surprised how much this is bothering him. Even years after everything happened, after all the work he's put into becoming more than just his past, it's still haunting him everywhere he goes.

Jungkook wanted to stay alone by pure choice. He doesn't want to give into some primal urges and get lost in it, to the point of morals and worth being thrown out the window. He knows that his kind- or at least, the kind his father cursed upon him with his partial genes- doesn't value emotional connections as much as other beings of the galaxy do. But still.

What that man did was unforgivable.

Jungkook doesn't remember his mother. He's sure he never met her- or maybe only as an infant, making him forget what she looked like. What he does know is that feeling of coldness he always received from his father- someone who should've raised him, or at least let the rest of the crew raise him. But that man would not let anyone care for him- Jungkook had to basically fight for his place, a place that wasn't even existing in the first place.

Nothing he could do would ever prove his worth to that man, because that man saw him as nothing but an accident. Something that should not have happened.

She was a great mother. Still is, even if Jungkook doesn't visit her much. She respects him, and his personal decisions- and that's more than he could ever ask for.

So, at the age of barely fourteen, he left the ship- with a bag of clothes and a bit of money from a crewmember, left alone on a planet near Cryon, where he met Seokjin and his mother. The young hybrid had instantly taken a liking to him, and after his mother learned of Jungkook's situation, she took him in- and willingly took on the role of a parental figure, no matter how much people looked at her oddly for her now two children that looked nothing like her.

But she cared for him.

For a long time, Jungkook had found comfort in his lifestyle. He wouldn't hurt anyone ever like he'd been hurt before, because he never attached himself to anyone or anything past friendliness. Jimin was an exception- but even he doesn't really get past his shell, never able to catch a glimpse of his heart.

And then came you.

You're nothing special. Just like his mother, you're a simple human being, cast aside with nowhere to go. And maybe that's why he wanted to shoot you so badly when he first saw you- because he took so much pity on you, that he felt like he'd be a worse person to let you live instead of giving you an end to your suffering. Humans are seen as nothing but greedy little parasites- they take and take and take and fight for nothing but their own self-worth.

And then you opened up. Every day you spent with him seemed to fuel your soul once more, charging up your will to live as you stopped trying to make him discard you at any given chance. And suddenly, he no longer saw the same victim as his mother once was in you- he saw someone. You're no longer just a being worth pity- you're you.

And he started to actually enjoy your company.

Especially after doing something like you did back with the vendor- you've proven yourself as someone that can and will decide what she wants to do. You didn't have to do this for him, and you know it, he knows that you know it. And he also knows that you didn't do it for him anyways, even if you think you did. Because you're basically defending your place in his life- on his ship.

And that's what scares him. That's what made him react like he did, yesterday.

You're not so easy to push around any longer. You're no longer someone who will just do as he says, and he wants that for you- you deserve your autonomy, you deserve to be able to make these decisions. But those things always come with a price.

And yes- maybe he's scared of you.

Because the longer you stay, the closer you get, the more it'll bug him or even hurt when you decide to move on from him. For years, Jungkook has feared hurting others- when in reality, he just got tired of being the one getting hurt. And now, with you in his life, it's already happening- because just sneaking a small glimpse at the security camera of your room shows you just quietly sitting on your bed, hugging your knees, waiting, thinking. And it hurts. He doesn't want you to be locked up like that. He wants you here, where he can see you, where you can talk, and where he can watch you knit your stupid little ball-shaped animals that you've hung everywhere at this point.

He likes them. Because they prove that you're actually here, that you're alive with him, and that you're not just wishful thinking.

His thumb runs over the little crooked horn of the goat you've knitted, that he's taken for himself now as it's attached to his keychain. He's been unkind and most of all unreasonable- but he doesn't know what to do now. You clearly want to stay, and it's also pretty obvious that you've found somewhat of an interest in him- and that terrifies him.

Because what if he does end up like him? What if he does fall into the same habits and behaviors as he did?

And how can he not, when you're already infesting his mind, without even doing anything at all?

He's forever branded as the 'accidental' son of a slave trader, a mistake that shouldn't have happened to begin with, and cost someone their life. He's no one you should associate with, let alone get involved with. You don't know who he is, what he is, and what kind of stigma he carries around. You've got no idea who you're currently traveling with, and maybe he needs to force you to face it.

Maybe if he shows you who he really is, you'll finally let him go.

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You're not too sure why you're so unable to just wait things out. He's clearly gotten upset yesterday, after you mentioned that you knew that he was partially human- but why?

There's no way he despises the entire human race- because he has been quite kind to you, even though he didn't have to be. Even his proposal of letting you stay with Seokjin instead of having to 'wait out' his whole… situation, was one of kindness. He could've just told you to stay in your room, but instead, he thought of a more comfortable alternative for you, despite the trouble of traveling and time cost.

So why did that rub him so wrongly when you mentioned it?

There's not much time to think about that however, as the door hisses open- causing you to hide under the blanket you previously had over your shoulders in a panic, the reaction almost instinctual. You can only feel the bed dip a little under his weight as he sits down on the edge of it, and when you peek out, you can see that he's not even looking at you. Instead, his hands are holding his keychain with your knitted little goat attached- fingers playing around with it in a nervous manner.

"My mother was a prostitute." He starts, voice low and without much emotion to it. "My father… enjoyed her services so much, that he bought her." He explains, and you slowly sit up, blanket falling from your head to rest on your shoulders instead. "Chances of.. pregnancy were low- considering she was human, and my father was not." Jungkook says, while you just watch him, not moving much.

"But it happened anyways."

You're watching him, staying right where you are- his back still turned towards you, while he continues to occupy himself with the little yarn toy you made. "I don't remember her. I only know that she died, at some point." He shrugs to himself. "Not like it matters. Neither of them thought of me as something other than an accident." He scoffs, and you feel the need to comfort him-

but you don't know how.

"So.. that's why you hate your human side?" You wonder, but he shakes his head.

"I don't hate it." He denies. "I just.. hate being reminded of what I am, I guess." Jungkook tries to explain. "I'm known as the son of a guy who knocked up a human prostitute. I'm a bastard who never lived up to his father's expectations." He growls mostly. "I'm nothing but a joke to most people who know my father. And you'll be nothing but a joke either, if you continue to travel with me." He turns towards you, looking over his shoulder at your knees- unable to quite face you fully.

"You're Jungkook." You say, and he freezes- before he slowly let's his eyes travel upwards to your face, eyes swirling colors, emotions unsure.

"..what?" He breathes out, genuinely unsure. He knows who he is. What the hell do you mean by that?

"You're Jungkook." You repeat, shrugging. "You're a shipcaptain. A vendor. Traveler." You start to count, and his irises start to change- slowly seemingly settling into a soft, warm hazel- timid, but appreciative almost.

Looking up the meanings of colors in your free time is really starting to pay off.

"You're not your father. Or your mother." You shake your head. "Neither will you be like your children, if you ever have some. I'm not like my parents either, and neither is anyone else." You explain. "We're all just in control of ourselves. The only life I have any control over is my own, and the only life you have control over is yours." You tell him, slowly moving a bit closer as he leans his head down to look at the floor again. "You can't change your past. You can't erase it either."

"So I'm just cursed with it." He scoffs at no one.

"Just as long as you don't accept it." You shrug next to him, your legs now dangling off the edge of the bed, bare feet swinging back and forth next to his boots which are firmly planted on the floor. "The moment you accept that that's a part of you, you can move on. Because you maybe can't change your past-" You say, bumping your shoulder into his side to lift the mood a little. "-but you can control your future."

"What's the point if no one cares about anything but that?" He argues, eyes a grim grey color. "It doesn't matter. I don't want you to be stuck with.. a label like that too." He shakes his head.

"I'm not like you though." You huff, crossing your arms, making him look at you. "I don't care."

"You don't care that people will think I'm just doing the same thing he did?" He challenges, looking at you with a fiery gaze. This is not going according to his plan. "You're telling me you don't give a shit about the fact that everyone who knows him, will see you and immediately think of you as nothing but a sex slave?" he argues, standing up to instead stand in front of you, hands pushing into the mattress right next to your thighs, face only inches from yours. "You don't get to lie to me and say that you don't care about that." He growls. "I don't accept you sitting here, trying to convince me that you won't mind being known as the human plaything of the bastard who couldn't even earn his spot in the crew of a slave trader." He growls.

"I don't mind." You answer, summoning all of your confidence not to flinch, even with his angry red gaze on you, noses almost touching.

"Why." He quietly sneers, clearly agitated. "How can you not care?!" He barks at you, and you do lean back a tiny bit at that- heart beating a bit faster from the sheer force of his emotions.

"If a tree falls down in the woods and no one's around to hear it, does it make a sound?" you ask, and it's almost comical how his eyes flash a surprised white, entire body flinching back in confusion. "It's a saying on earth." You explain. "If you don't take a picture of a sunset, was it really as pretty as you remember?" You ask, and he seems entirely caught off guard.

"I don't.. understand." He admits. You giggle.

"Me calling you a bird doesn't make you one." You explain with a smile. And that, seems to click with him, as he looks at you with what you can only describe as genuine surprise. As if he's never really.. thought about it like that.

And then, you lean forward- arms pulling him closer, as you rest your head against his shoulder, holding him for a good moment.

Something he simply lets happen, because you're right.

He is in control of his life.

"I'm scared of you." He confesses, and you're a bit surprised, letting go of him as he stands upright again, arms crossed, eyes a pinkish hue.

"huh?" You ask, unsure what he's talking about.

"I.. enjoy your company." He admits. "I want you to stay. But at the same time, I want you to stay away from me." He tells you.

"..why?" You wonder, his words not making any sense.

"Because you can hurt me." He explains. "Maybe not physically- but emotionally."

"…oh." You realize what he's talking about, and now it's you who's looking away. "I mean.. uh.. I mean you're really handsome, don't get me wrong! But-" You stammer, a little bashful now. And the worst thing is that now, he seems oddly confident again- as if that was all he needed to connect the dots that you're not the only one developing deeper interest in the other.

"Handsome, huh?" He comments, arms crossed, gaze playfully pink.

"I uh- yeah? But uhm.. I mean, you know.. we're kind of just starting to really talk, so.." You mumble, looking away now. What the hell? Since when are you this shy? And how have you not noticed him not even wearing his usual uniform jacket? Those tattoos fill up his entire arm-

"That we do." He nods, feeling oddly light now that he's.. talked about this, to anyone. "And I'd.. like to continue to talk to you." He offers, making you look up at him again.

And somehow, you can read the message he's actually trying to tell you, between the lines of those words.

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You're putting a bag on the free spot near his control station, causing him to look at you with a questioning gaze.

You've both agreed on a few rules now that you're staying during his.. well, mating season issue. One of them is to keep physical contact to a minimum, and other general rules are to leave him alone if he asks you to, or to take some time to wake up before walking into the command central- though you're not sure what that one's about. It's all stuff you can follow easily though- especially if it makes him more comfortable being around you. "what's this?" He wonders, opening the bag, finding multiple, small yarn animals inside.

"I'm being productive!" You exclaim proudly. "Maybe we could sell them at our next stop? I'm sure someone has like.. maybe a currency or two left over to pay for one of them." You propose, but much to your surprise, he seems rather conflicted over it, pulling one out to inspect. It's a mouse, black bead eyes staring at him. "You don't think so?" You wonder, and he shrugs.

"No, it's not that.." He mumbles. "But.. you don't have to earn money." He tells you.

"I know. But I want to." You explain yourself. "And, the ship is already full of them. We can sell those too-" You say, reaching for a short snake hanging from a screw slightly poking out the metal casing of the control screen, when he reaches out first, snatching it almost protectively away from you first.

"No-!" He barks, looking around with a sharp, cautiously yellow gaze. "…those can stay." He clears his throat, hanging the little knitted animal back where it was, adjusting it's position so it faces him. "We're not going to land anywhere within the next few weeks anyways. We'll fuel at outposts instead." He tries to justify.

"Jungkook.. we can't hoard all of them here." You giggle, and he looks to the side at that, clearly feeling called out.

"..I'm not hoarding them. I'm just saying you don't have to.. work, or anything like that." He argues back, trying to occupy himself with the control panel.

"I know. But, with the money I get from maybe selling them, I could buy more yarn or something." You shrug, sitting on one of the nearby server boxes.

"..what's wrong with me buying it for you?" He growls a bit offended, jaw clenched. You know this is probably just his hormones making him act like that, but it's still a little funny to tease him.

"Nothing!" You laugh. "I just wanna be independent. Earn my spot." You explain.

"You don't have to earn shit." He denies, tapping away on the touch panel in front of him. "...but I guess if you want to. Don't need my permission anyways." He huffs annoyed, making you laugh as you look at him almost pout to himself, trying to appear all busy when in reality, you know that the course he's flying is a safe route the autopilot has flown numerous times before.

"Hey Jungkook?" You ask, and he looks up at that, showing you his attention has been caught. "I like you." You say, and the look on his face is quite literally the most hilarious and wholesome thing you've ever seen -

Eyes wide open, round and filled with a shy blue, before it melts into pink, seconds until he closes them, and holds a hand in front of them to shield himself.

"Timeout, you demon!" He barks out, opening the main door for you. "Get out!" He yells, though it's clear that he doesn't mean it in an evil or genuinely upset manner.

Because even though you do as he says, laughing on your way to your room, he does later check in to make sure he's not actually mad at you- though it's rather sent as a text message on the control screen in your room, instead of spoken words.

Small steps, you think to yourself. Small steps.

[romanticbloodmoon]

𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐌𝐄! 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐌𝐄! 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐌𝐄!

yandere! jeong gu-won x f! reader

sypnosis: having found himself yet in the dark once more after do do-hee's death – he refused to fall in love again. but in the end, he could not survive the drowning, twisted obsession he was brought to by merely being in your presence.

content warnings: yandere themes, obsessive behavior, violence, threats, murder, unhealthy relationships

"i'm sorry."

those two words were always the dreadful line he somehow could not cross, despite his handsome appearance and ability to make impossible possible – jeong gu-won never thought a day would come, when he'd live a life where he wasn't in love with do do-hee.

how strange, isn't it? yet even as as eons passed, no matter how many previous lives he's lived through, one would only wonder.

was it fate to be entangled with you, too?

the feeling of having been lost the second half your soul – in which was impossible to bring back if the woman he loved was no longer around. that's how he interpreted the situation. he refused to attend do do-hee's funeral.

having believed it was his fault for not pushing her away when the gun fired, or whether he should have acted fast enough to use his powers and evade the sudden attack. why would him, the reason behind her death, even be welcomed there?

but that was then, and this was now. gu-won had never expected to fall in love again. having lost for the second time, he never wished to pursue – even if there were to be a third chance, who'd say he'd be able to protect his loved one that time too? but the longer he stayed ... the harder it was to leave. gu-won, given he was a demon, did not find his behavior very concerning nor twisted in the slightest. however, everyone did.

you were too good for this world. he had to protect you if it meant going through more extreme means necessary. your beautiful eyes, drowned within a pristine innocence that couldn't be described. too curious, too adorable, simply too irresistible. gu-won found himself falling for you unintentionally, the sick feeling of obsession tearing into his chest. yet everytime, he tried to focus on your wellbeing. naturally, he didn't want to scare you off – he'd never want to hurt such a fragile human in his lifetime, seeing as you could dissapear from his grasp anytime.

but when it came to others however; it was much more different. gu-won showed his more demonic side in that case. he was not allowed to kill a human, least he end up burning away – and no! of course we wouldn't want that. but there was aways a solution to his problems.

nowhere did it ever say he was not allowed to torture, right? no matter who it was. whether it be a friend or simply a business partner, he was jealous. and he will see absolute red if you be damned to be flirted with any of them. even as a joke. he will not warn you in that case. after all, he's too busy taking them away from your life forever. torturing them.

until they kill themselves from the sheer pressure of loosing their sanity, gu-won will not be pleased. he had always been so sweet with you, helping you with any means necessary using his powers – both for productivity and entertainment.

until the eventual time came for him to confess his feelings, having not went too far to proclaim the love he had for you. the demon and you were hanging out as friends – his gaze may be dark, but his violent intentions were never for you. that was what he always thought, that he was too good for this world. insignificant humans have no choice but to fall for his charm, no? until it wasn't the case.

"i ... don't think i can be in a relationship now."

his smile had faltered the minute those soft words left your pretty red lips, gu-won unintentionally felt the tightening of his fist. he felt it for the first time. he'd never felt such pure, unfiltered rage seethe into his body as you reject him.

how could you even do that?! he was handsome, he had amazing powers to awe you, and he was everything a good boyfriend and husband could ever be. so why? "why?" he repeats quietly, forcing himself to look strong as you look down timidly. the demon just wanted to take you here and now.

it felt too annoying to put up with waiting, to pine for your love again and again. gu-won stared as you left him behind, in the dust, where he'd suffer years without having your love to him back. no. he refuses to let you slip away. not after everything he's already lost from his control.

he did the unthinkable – never would one think the man himself would loose all morals because of you, going crazy the further he could not breathe near you, touch you, love you.

"director jeong, please calm down!" it was already a disaster as mr. park raised his hands in defeat – watching as gu-won thrashed about in his office, nearly ripping the demon manual as he flipped through each page with such force and speed. he ignored the butler, much more focused on something else. the moment he stopped on the page of 137, his eyebrows lifted, a somewhat challenging grin escaping his dark expression. gu-won shuts it closed, scaring mr. park.

just you wait. the man walks out of his office, steps loud and obnoxious, yet calculated. he knew you had no choice, and he'll make you love him if it meant he won't loose you. clad in all black, his figure ravishing as ever as he teleports atop the clock tower. gu-won made no risks. he knew what he was doing.

within seconds ... you had appeared within his peripheral vision, a nearly panicked gasp causing you to trip – not before his large, warm hand grabbed onto you, pulling you to his chest. "i never allowed you to say no." he whispered lowly in your ear.

eyes widening, your heartbeat began to increase in speed, encased within the hands of a dangerous man, known as jeong gu-won. his face showed no remorse towards his actions, nearly looking as crazily possessive in his expression. he held you tight, lips pressed against your smooth neck – feeling every inch of your skin in his hands like putty. he smiled calmly.

"g- gu-won ... please, let me go." it was a polite request, one that held of no malice or begging as you simply asked for his permission to teleport you back home. but he did not respond. not after the first minute at least. "no." and that was it. simple as it had sounded, it would be impossible to ever leave his side now.

he would give everything to always keep you by him. if not, there will be hellish consequences. and that was what happened. you needed to stop struggling – crying for him to leave you alone. can't you understand he's doing this to protect you from harm? what if you get badly hurt, or die?! gu-won could only have so much patience too, you know. even moreso, he was a demon.

and he could not hold it anymore. cold and lonely, yet so warm and loving in the mix. the chandelier gleaming perfectly, crystals embedded bright as it shines above gu-won's office. you were unable to leave upon being completely shut off from mankind inside sunwol foundation. the demon's patience was tested, and this was your fault. all that kept your sanity intact was mr. park and jin ga-young, whom tried their best to help you through this and make your life feel more comfortable.

gayoung knew all too well what gu-won experienced in his past, given she was one of the people who attended do do hee's funeral. she knew better than to mess with gu-won's new lover, knowing how he was on the brink of his sanity's end.

"how are you today, darling?" entering the large doors of his office, gu-won gave you a welcoming smile as he went over to you by the couch and held your face gently in his hands. you could only ever force a smile back, having poured too many tears to fight back his control over your life. the handsome demon brushes aside any hair on your face, leaning in for a kiss as his warmth enveloped you whole.

it felt intoxicating, yet that was only his devilish charms at work. quite a bad situation to be in – yet nonetheless, you were weaker than him. gu-won's ache for your touch was burning passionately, fingers stroking your waist as he went in for a second kiss, gu-won's teeth tugging softly at your bottom lip.

there was no more time to go back and change your decisions. this was it, the life you'd have to live with the devil such as he. not only were you pushed down the couch, pinned beneath his arms; you had sunk into the deep depths of his twisted love, to be his pretty little doll he'll take care of for eternity, until death.

you should have seen this coming from a mile away. he was becoming a shell of what he was in his human past. not a murderer, yet a potentially dangerous man that threatens the lives of many on earth. you should have just said yes to him.

after all – even when you die, he'll work his darnedest to own you in the next life together, too.

[blingblong55]

All I can think of now is a proper what we do in the shadows! 141 AU, where the gang are a coven of vampires and there’s a documentary crew following them around. 🫧

Price is the oldest, perhaps a famous outlaw from over a thousand years ago. He views his coven as his children.

Gaz has been his companion for the longest. He was a knight or a soldier. Price has fought in a few wars to give himself something to do over the years, but couldn’t stand the thought of his new comrade and pseudo-child Kyle getting killed. He was far too young to die, so Price made sure he wouldn’t.

He met Ghost next when he was running one of his many criminal empires (again, he wanted something to do). Ghost had joined as a low level thug but quickly worked up the ranks to become one of his inner-circle. He was a cold blooded killer with little remorse - or so Price thought. Once he’s come to know of Simon’s upbringing and life, filled with hardship and pain, John knew he couldn’t just leave the lost soul alone. He deserved a chance to heal and make real, lasting connections with people who wouldn’t hurt or leave him, so Price turned him.

Soap and Grim are the newest additions to the coven. One of them probably became his familiar after being dared by the other, and they quickly worked their way into his unbeating heart. Price worried a lot for his two youngest children and they were giving him grey hairs after thousands of years without (how could be not worry with their love of explosives and lack of self preservation?) so he decided that, so he could keep a good eye on them and make sure that they didn’t get hurt, Johnny and R/n should join him and his older children in undeath.

Price was wary of the crew filming this ‘documentary’ about them, but his two youngest just seemed so happy to have new friends to play with, so he allowed it. Ghost would be the most guarded, happily taking care of a few of the crew who got too close, thought it would be funny to come to work with a crucifix in their pocket, or made a snide comment towards one of his family. Gaz is cheeky, friendly, and happy to joke around with them, and probably gives them the most actually useful information. He’s the only reason the documentary can actually be called factual or educational. Soap and Grim are happy to have new people to mess with. They like to jumpscare the crew by flying in their face as bats, appear out of nowhere, hypnotise them and convince them to act silly, and stage nerf gun wars with everyone in the house - cameramen included.

hear me out!

Graves is Simon the Devious (ironic ik)

The cameramen never get used to this, never. Price, oh that poor man, he wishes at times he didn't have a soft spot for his children but then again, this is what he chose

I would also like to introduce the two dumb little young vampires, Johnny and grim, not only did they both dare each other to become familiars but their dumbasses didn't know the other was going to go through with it!!! They end up finding out when Gaz introduces them to each other...

Three days into being familiars, they set off a bomb, nearly kills them but father senses tingle and Price finds them in time.

Five days into being familiars, they nearly die in six explosions, 2 car accidents and one orea choking accident, so that's when Price decides its time to make them vampires, he knows they are unkillable unless they step into the sun, which they almost have....14 times so far-...make that 15 times

[mrsbakashi]

Hi. I hope you're still taking request. Can I request 😤 headcanons for kakashi and fem!reader from the emoji prompt? I hope you have a nice day 😘

hi, chii! bet you didn't remember you had requested this, but i finally wrote it! and i hope you like it 💕

😤: a jealousy headcanon - kakashi

kakashi takes pride in not being jealous. he’s usually rational and never lets his emotions get the best of him – even when and if he feels jealous, for whatever reason, he’s strong enough not to do anything about it;

there are a few times he can’t be much rational, though, and of course, they all involve you;

it was ridiculous, because you two weren’t dating, and you were nothing but friends — no, not even that; you were simple colleagues, acquaintances or whatever. and that was the reason you were so damn angry all the time. because you had all that energy, all that longing for him and nowhere to put it. your whole body aching to be close to him, and you having to deal with seeing him every day without throwing yourself at him, and it's been like that for years now;

you felt like a teenager to be honest, with the stares from across the room, the lingering touches, the racy heart when his name was mentioned — and he had to know. he had to. and he did. and that’s where the problem lived.

kakashi liked you. he cared deeply about you, you were his first thought in the morning and last thought at night, and he wasn’t stupid or oblivious, he had noticed how you blushed whenever you two talked, how you laughed harder trying to get his attention when you were in the same room, and the way your eyes were always on him when you thought he couldn’t see you – he knew, and he wished he could do something about it, but he couldn’t.

you see, kakashi had lost everyone he had ever cared for, and he knew that the destiny of the people that he let in wasn’t good – they either ended up dead or hurt, and it was unfair to put someone through that when he could easily prevent that from happening.

kakashi knew you deserved better – you were too lovely to be stuck with someone like him. you lit up any room you entered, lightened up the mood, made everyone feel at ease, no matter what they were going through, and he was no exception to that power of yours. he cherished you, loved being around you. you were like this giant ball of sunshine, warmth and happiness, and it was impossible to feel unhappy around you. but he knew you deserved better. you deserved an actual chance at being happy, so he’d keep the distance and only enjoy your presence by far.

what he didn’t know, of course, was that you had no interest in anyone else whatsoever – and who was to blame you? who was better than the freaking copynin? no one. that’s why you had your mind set on proving he was the one you wanted.

you knew why he was reluctant; it was obvious, and it broke your heart to know that he felt this way, but that only made you feel more determined. you weren’t lucky, but you sure was fierce, and you knew he had to like you, at least a little tiny tiny bit, you felt it! and yes, you could be wrong, but sometimes life is about taking risks.

it was at a party that it all went down. anko’s birthday party.

people drinking, singing, dancing, loud music, colorful lights and probably more people than the place could and should fit. it seemed like everyone was there; not a single soul was missing – even kakashi was there. you knew he probably came with gai and he would stay for about ten minutes and then leave when he thought no one else was paying attention, as usual. but maybe tonight could go a little different;

you were wearing a little tiny red dress you had bought with kurenai two weeks ago for this exact party, your head straight into the mission of making it impossible for kakashi to take his eyes off of you — and from the way you saw him looking at you the second you walked through the door, mission accomplished;

you wanted to talk to him, but didn’t want to seem too desperate, and you didn’t know how long you were supposed to wait before approaching him casually and ask about his day and if he was enjoying the party, but you figured a few minutes should do.

so you would see who was around, drink something, recognize which song was playing, maybe watch him from the corner where you were pretty sure he couldn’t see you... and then someone popped into your field of vision and touched your arm. “hey, beautiful”.

you replied with a polite smile and the man invited you to dance – you figured there was no harm in dancing a little, in fact it would be better, giving you a little more time to stay away from kakashi and then act like you didn’t come to the party because of him only. i mean, happy birthday anko and all, sure, but let’s be real.

so you followed the man to the dance floor with a careful smile never leaving your face, then it all happened at once, but in slow motion at the same time – the man placed his hands on your hips and pulled you close, almost too close in your opinion, but he was harmless, you thought. you moved your hips to the beat of the song when you felt his left hand snaking through your body, and then there was another hand circling your wrist and pulling you away from that man’s grip. “sorry, i need to talk to her, it’s urgent” kakashi excused himself while the man nodded;

kakashi held your hand firmly as you walked through the sea of people and headed to the back of the club, away from the noise, ending up in the parking lot.

“is everything okay?” you asked, alarmed by his unusual acting

“yeah, just... give me a second.”

you remained silent, even though there were a million questions bubbling on your mind – and about half of them started with “will you please kiss me?”.

kakashi’s eyes wandered through the whole parking lot before stopping on you, and he watched you carefully as he said “i’m sorry”.

you had no idea why he was apologizing, but you started to say your automatic response to the words ‘i’m sorry’, which were “no, it’s okay, don’t worry about it.” you regretted the words the second they left your lips, because now you missed the chance to ask what he was sorry for.

but none of you moved. instead, you stayed there, staring at each other, in that awkward silence filled by the distant sounds that came from the club.

“a-are you okay?” you asked again, finally breaking the unbearable silence.

“i should be, right?”

“oh, kashi, what’s wrong?” there was authentic concern in your voice, enough to make kakashi feel even worse.

he shook his head. “i pulled you away from him, and i was filled with this urge, as if i had any right to- and i didn’t. i don’t. i’m sorry.”

“no, it’s okay, don’t worry ab... wait, i’m sorry, what?”

“you see, i can handle a lot, but seeing someone else’s hands all over your body isn’t on the list. and the way he was looking at you, and this damn dress, and i just..." he took a deep breath before continuing, "i’m sorry, ok? let’s just go back inside. i didn’t mean to ruin the party for you”

“wait” you open a smile at the sudden realization. “you were jealous.”

kakashi snorted, clearly uncomfortable with the situation.

“you were, weren’t you?”

“yes. now let’s go back inside.”

“why? so i can dance with other men and have their hands all over my body until you pull me back to this parking lot?”

“that’s not happening again, i already said i’m sorry.”

“no, it’s okay, don’t worry abo- damn it!!”

you heard Kakashi chuckle and that put a big smile on your face.

“i don’t want to go back inside.”

kakashi closed his eyes, realizing he now would have to deal with the consequences of his own actions. if he could go back in time, he would have left the party the second you passed through the front door with that ridiculously sexy dress. there would be no trouble. he wouldn’t have seen that man’s hands on your body, he wouldn’t have pulled you away, he wouldn’t be with you in this parking lot now, admitting to you he was jealous while you had too much fun with the fact and he fought the urge to have his own hands all over your body. now he had to convince you to go back to the party and completely avoid you for the rest of his life because now you knew he had feelings for you. fuck.

“it’s your call, but i think anko might be missing your presence.” he tried.

“uh, i highly doubt that. but even if it were true, i’d rather be here with you.”

kakashi sighed.

“look,” you touched his hand to get his attention “i know you’re probably struggling internally right now because you want me to go away and i don’t want to go away – also, i will not go away -, and i know you feel guilty and cursed because of what happened in the past, but-"

“please-”

“i was there!" you interrupted him before he could start his 'go away' speech. "i was there and i saw you! it was impossible to get to you. it still is! i’ve been trying for forever to reach you! and you can’t tell me to get lost or that i don’t know anything, because i. was. there. and i’m not just some random girl. i saw you. i see you.”

he tried to say something, but there was nothing in his mind that fit the situation. he spent years pushing people away, to the point everyone developed a new dynamic to interact with him, and they were all used to it. kakashi was never around much; kakashi was always on missions; kakashi was always reading something instead of talking to people. and no one ever said anything about it, not even gai. and it wasn’t because they didn’t care, but it was because kakashi vanished at the slightest mention of his past. but when you said it, it wasn’t like that. it made him feel cared for, a feeling he thought he’d never feel again.

“it wasn’t your fault. and you deserve love. you deserve it, damn it!”

you were looking into his eye, and for the first time in forever, kakashi felt seen. it was like you could see everything that was in his soul and more. and you had never looked so beautiful. so, before he had time to think and regret, he pulled his mask down and kissed you with all the yearning and aching he had been holding, like you were the answer to all of his problems, the light he didn’t know he had been longing for. and he didn’t stop, not when you smiled and unwillingly broke the kiss, and definitely not when you let out a little moan and ran your fingers through his hair, pulling him closer while you stood on your tiptoes.

“wow!” you blurted, the biggest smile on your face when he finally broke the kiss, only so you two could get some air.

kakashi didn’t let go of you; his hands were still holding you in place by the waist, forehead resting against yours, his breath mixing with yours. he wouldn’t let you go. now that he finally had you, he wouldn’t let you go.

“i hadn’t seen this handsome face in a long time…” you cupped his face, and he leaned in at the touch. “hi.”

“hi.” he smiled, like he was greeting a very old friend, which he was in fact. it had been easy to forget how close you two were in the past, before it all happened, before he shut down.

you kissed him again, just to make sure he was really there, and he was – there, kissing you back. it was like a dream, like one of the many you’ve had before. you’d be so pissed if you’d wake up in half an hour alone in bed, with only the memory of the dream to get you through the day.

“so, um, i guess we should go back inside now. i think someone probably noticed we both have disappeared...” you said as you reached his hand with yours, intertwining your fingers, ready to walk back to the club.

“i don’t know how to put this in a polite way, but i don’t give a shit.”

his words caught you off guard and you laughed harder than you should’ve.

“no, you don’t understand, mr. hatake” you continued, “i still have to dance with at least three other men.”

his grip on your waist got tighter.

“i don’t want to be this kind of guy, but i don’t care if you promised to dance with three other men or with the hokage himself, you’re not going.”

“oh, no, but it’s very important!” you pleaded, trying to hold a laugh. “please!”

“y/n, what’s going on?”

“nothing, it’s just that since you were jealous and we’ve established that you now have, in fact, the right to do whatever you feel like… i was just wondering what would your jealous self do to me this time, if you caught me in another man's arms...” you bit your lower lip, looking up at him from behind your lashes.

kakashi let out a crooked smile as he pulled you even closer. "i have a pretty good idea how that would go."

guess you were about to find out.

kakashi's taglist: @smutteedreams @justmyownreality @nightingaleflow @allyallygator @thetimelesschild @jyotsna-d @rocknrollsoul76 @crimsonxuchiha @hellogec @savsxz @slut-4sasuke

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© MRSBAKASHI / MRSBAKASHI 2023 - ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. DO NOT COPY OR PLAGIARIZE MY CONTENT AND POST ON THIS WEBSITE OR DIFFERENT PLATFORMS.

[thesassypadawan]

A Scary Good Time (Padawan Anakin x RealWorldFemReader)

Summary: A little throwback to the fanfics of old! Short, sweet, and cheesy! Anakin meets you, a mysterious padawan, on his way to the party! Happy Halloween!

Warnings: Contains fluff, fluff, and more fluff!

Notes: A Old Good Time *part 2*

A New Good Time *part 3*

Halloween, that one night a year when the veil between worlds was at its thinnest. The spirits and beings of other realms can easily enter into our world. If one isn't careful enough, they might find themselves crossing paths with a wandering soul.

"Kriff, kriff, kriff!" Anakin curse to himself over and over again. He had lost track of time while practicing lightsaber drills and was now running late.

Tonight was the temple's annual Halloween party, his absolute favorite holiday. And, not wanting to miss a minute more, the padawan decided to take a small shortcut.

He had gone the way dozens of times, knew it as well as the back of his hand. However, as he ran further down the path, Ani began to feel as if he had never traveled it before.

The foliage looked different and was more dense. There had been some statues scattered along the way, but they were nowhere to be found. The same went for the little fountain he should have passed by now, it was like it had just vanished.

Stopping underneath a tree, Anakin took in his surroundings. Things had indeed change and there was also the sense that he wasn't alone.

"You sure make one handsome looking devil, Ani," a tiny voice sounded from above.

His hand immediately flew to the hilt of his saber. How had the force not alerted him of another's presence? Cautiously, he tilted his head upwards and was meet by the sight of...

You sitting on one of the lower branches, legs swinging lazily, a vision dressed in all white.

Sparks flew, Anakin was completely awestruck by you. Finding his voice, he tentatively asked. "Are you an angel?"

An impish smile crossed your face. "Sorry, I'm just a Padawan from Earth. Who also happens to be a little stuck."

Without a second thought, Ani reached for and helped you down. "Earth? Never heard of it before."

Laughing nervously, you fidgeted with his braid. "Oh, you know, it's a planet near wild space. Very old and very tiny. Not many in the galaxy realize it even exists."

A part of him said that he should have pressed for more details. That nothing about this whole conversation was normal. But the longer Anakin stood there, gazing deeply into your eyes, that things became more right. Almost like he had known you his entire life.

"Anyways, are you heading to the party?"

"Um, yeah," he replied, suddenly feeling very flustered. "Would you maybe want to go together? Like as a date or something?"

Standing on your tip-toes, you placed a small kiss on his cheek. "That sounds wonderful."

Blushing profusely, Ani shyly took your hand into his and gave a gentle tug. "Come on then, let's go have ourselves a scary good time."

"So cheesy," you giggled, happily lacing your fingers with his.

______________________________________________________________

The party did indeed prove to be a "scary good time". Filled with lots of tricks and treats.

You dance to nearly every song. Played a few of the corny games. Indulged yourselves in some delicious sweets. Shared a not age-appropriate drink or two. And, of course, stole a kiss when either of you got the chance. You were completely inseparable.

Not wanting the evening to end, it, of course, flew by entirely too fast and soon you had to...

"Do you really have to go back tonight?" Anakin asked sadly, standing beneath the tree where you met. "Can't you at lease stay until the morning?"

"I wish I could," you sighed, hand resting on his cheek. "If I don't leave now, I might not get the chance again for a long time."

He perked up. "That's fine! You can stay with my master and I in the meantime! I'm sure he wou-"

"Ani," you pressed a finger to his lips. "I'm sure Obi-Wan wouldn't mind, but it doesn't change things."

Wrapping your arms around his neck, you pulled him into a sweet and tender kiss.

"Happy Halloween, my handsome devil," you whispered. "I hope to see you again before next year."

The wind picked up, making the fallen leaves swirl all around both of you. And then suddenly died off, revealing...

Anakin standing alone, a jedi holocron setting in his hands. "Happy Halloween, my beautiful angel," he muttered. "I hope so too."

[shiicheol]

silent conversations ~ 3

‣ pairing: jeon wonwoo x oc 

‣ summary: Maxine found comfort in regularly sending messages to the number of her deceased ex, seeing no harm in it—until she received a response from a persistent stranger named Wonwoo. What are the chances of forming a connection with this unexpected stranger? How will their story unfold?

‣ genre: strangers to lovers. angst.

‣ chapters:

one

two

‣ disclaimer: The ideas and personalities depicted in this Alternate Universe (AU) do not reflect the actual views or characteristics of the artists. Their names are used purely as placeholders. Please remember that these stories are fictional and do not represent reality. Thank you!

Wonwoo's POV

In a world where billions of people live, there is that unique shared characteristic or experience with someone you have never or will never meet.

This shows the undeniable interconnectedness of one another.

They say, one of the few ways to connect with people is to have a high level of empathy or to have lived a similar life as the other.

I'd typically be glad that in at least one in a billion, there stood a person who can understand me.

But here I am in that exact situation, nowhere close to feeling ecstatic.

How? How can you feel such positive emotions when you know someone is struggling?

How can I feel relief upon catching sight of a lonely, lost soul?

~ TEXT CONVERSATION ~

Texting Stranger

I'm sorry.

I was drunk out of my mind. I called you at such an inappropriate time, you should have not picked up. Sorry for the inconvenience.

Wonwoo

Will all our conversations play out like this?

Texting Stranger

What?

Wonwoo

You apologizing despite not doing anything wrong.

Texting Stranger

I called you. I'm a stranger.

Wonwoo

I don't mind.

Texting Stranger

It's still wrong. I'm sorry. I'll refrain myself next time. There's something about alcohol that alters my brain chemistry.

Wonwoo

If it helps you to message the number, then it will never be a bother.

~ A FEW DAYS LATER ~

Wonwoo's POV

It was 2 am and I was just about to go to bed when my phone suddenly rang.

"Texting Stranger," appeared on the screen.

I looked at it with wide eyes, expecting a call from her soon but definitely not this soon.

I cleared my throat before picking up, "Love..." said the other end with a drunken voice.

"P-please, come back. I'm sorry, love. I miss you, please."

In a situation like this, no amount of words can comfort a person. In fact, there were no right words.

So I did what I seemed to have been doing best.

I hummed her a lullaby.

It went on.. 

And on... 

And on...

Until slurred words turned into murmurs.

Until murmurs turned into quiet snores.

Similar to the other night, I waited.

I waited with the moon.

I waited until the quiet snores stabilized.

I waited until the sun rose.

I too was falling asleep but how could I leave?

When the person at the end of the line had put up with sleepless nights.

What was a little waiting, right?

~ TEXT CONVERSATION ~

Texting Stranger

Fuck.

I did it again.

I can't help myself.

The next time you see a call, please decline.

Or simply do not pick up.

Do both of us a favor.

Wonwoo

What?

No one is stopping you.

Call me if you need to.

Text if you need to.

As long as it brings you comfort, then keep doing it.

Texting Stranger

Why?

Wonwoo

What?

Texting Stranger

Why do you speak as if what I'm doing isn't a bad thing?

Wonwoo

Why do you speak as if what you're doing IS a bad thing?

Wonwoo's POV

And so the late-night call became a routine.

There were no words exchanged between the both of us.

Just the phrases she consistently slurred, calling out to the unknown.

And my humming echoed throughout my dark room, with the reflection of the moon being the only source of light.

Moments like these I think of being under the same moonlight.

With someone, I've been talking to for weeks.

With someone, I can somehow relate to.

But also with someone who I do not know.

A FEW DAYS LATER

I'm falling asleep. No call from you tonight? I thought to myself.

It's 3:30 am, I guess not.

However, my thoughts were interrupted when I suddenly heard the loud ringing from my tiny device. 

Incoming Call From "Texting Stranger" Words on my phone flashed.

Just when I was about to fall asleep, the call I've been waiting for is finally here.

"Hey! Love! Hello, love! Let's party like old times!" said the voice.

What? Is she out partying?

Based on the loud background and her voice, I was able to tell that she was not within the comforts of her home.

She was out.

In a club.

So as calmly as possible, I asked.

"Where are you?"

Just as expected, there was no response from her.

Nothing but slurred words.

"Please, help me out here. Where are you?" I said as slowly as I could in hopes of helping her understand it better.

"I don't know. I'm here." She said, followed by a giggle.

I sigh and waited for any sign.

I was losing hope until I heard a booming voice from the background.

"Are you feeling hot tonight? Well, the night in Xylo has just begun!" said who I assume to be the DJ of the bar.

Got it.

As I was on the way to Xylo, I thought about the odds of me doing this in the first place.

I shouldn't feel obligated to do this.

I was a stranger. 

She was a stranger.

But maybe for once, letting go of the infamous notion, of "Stranger, danger" wouldn't be too bad.

My thoughts were interrupted as soon as I saw that my ride had stopped in the club I promised I would never step foot on.

Yet here I am to save another lost soul.

But this time, it was no longer myself.

As soon as I entered, I let my eyes wander.

There, I locked eyes with people who drank in celebration, heartbreak, and simply to let loose.

But how can I possibly find someone who I do not know the appearance of?

How do I find someone who refuses to be found?

Thus, I let my eyes wander then as if everything had gone in slow motion.

Bingo.

I spotted her.

How?

Because she was shining.

Because she looked sad.

Because out of everyone there, one only had the ability to look dashing despite being in such a state.

Because there she stood with a glint in her eyes that held a thousand emotions.

Because there she stood silent, with hundreds of people that somehow made her look lonelier than ever.

[thgfanfictionlibrary]

Teen and Up Rated Fics Masterlist (13)

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10 / Part 11 / Part 12 /

Created: January 28th, 2024

Last Checked:—-

All's Fair-wineredroseblossoms (ao3) Summary: “I dream of you,” he said, his voice husky and desperate. Somehow, the space between them had shrunk to nearly nothing. He was so close he could smell her scent: honeysuckle and soap. It was intoxicating, maddening. His lips grazed the shell of her ear as he murmured. “I dream of you, and such dreams as I would never speak of to a soul, save … save for the woman who inhabits them.”

but the rain is always gonna come (if you’re standing with me)-starryprose (ao3) Summary: Katniss, Peeta, and the rain. Based off the prompt “One character is caught in the rain someplace & they are contemplating what to do when their partner comes running out of nowhere with an umbrella & they go home together.”

Christmas Wish-burkygirl (ao3) Summary: Katniss has only one chance to be able to give Prim the Christmas she deserves, a talent contest sponsored by the local radio station. Still grieving over the recent death of his father, Peeta is spending a quiet day in the bakery when a bittersweet Christmas song drifts over the radio, stirring up a longing for his lost love. This songfic is a one-shot from the Flying Solo universe, inspired by Michael Buble’s cover of All I Want for Christmas is You.

Come Morning Light-crazyundeadfairy (ff.net) Summary: A very AU take on Peeta's rescue in Mockingjay.

Happy Birthday Peeta (Perfect)-endlessnightlock (ao3) Summary: Jrosely requested a surprise party for Peeta. Katniss and Peeta have been best friends since they were little, and on Peeta's birthday things change between the two.

If We Met Up at Midnight-Mollywog (ao3) Summary: Had the messenger arrived a day earlier, he would have been greeted by a yellow flag above our door, and had to turn back, summons undelivered. The odds, however, are not in my favor.

Impressive-burkygirl (ao3) Summary: A prequel to The One, in response to the prompt: “Well that’s the single most impressive thing I’ve ever seen someone do.”

Longest Night-LastLeaf (ao3) Summary: I know it's him without even having to turn around, though I'm still shocked he's here. Peeta Mellark isn't exactly the type to slum it in the Seam. But here he is, bundled up in a long, dark wool coat with large buttons down the front, a fine maroon scarf snugly knotted at his throat. I don't see Peeta outside the bakery very often, but every once in awhile I might run into him at the public market in Town. When that happens, he'll give me a lopsided grin and a friendly “Hey, stranger,” but, even though we've gotten to know each other a little bit in the past year or so, we rarely talk about anything personal. On the night of the Winter Solstice, Katniss finds a way to help Peeta Mellark.

On the First day of Christmas…-oakfarmer (ao3) Summary: District 7's tradition of 'Christmas' has spread to the post war District 12. Peeta tries to help Katniss embrace these new strange customs. Hoping a few of them may bring his true love some cheer during the winter season.

Side Project-Ronja (ao3) Summary: A collection of scenes written for "the Project", but removed for various reasons - usually pacing and for sheer length. Not necessarily compliant anymore with the rest of the story.

[ferinehuntress]

Okay, I had a bit of a rough week, so I haven't been on my best mind or thoughts because of things.

However, I do finally want to do a belated New Year's greeting and appreciation to some people who I think I want to say things about because they are the reason why I'm still on my blog and what has made my life beautiful.

I do not celebrate New Year's, however, I do believe in trying to look to the better, to hope for better. It is not about a new year and erasing everything that has happened, but having a chance to build yourself how you want to. I do not do resolutions nor do I believe in the idea of New Year's meaning kissing or drinking. It's a time to appreciate what you have and who you have it with.

◈　@shimmerbeasts　 ⋯　 I would have never expected to have made such a powerful and impactful relationship with Miss T when I first met her. And yet, after six months, she has become not only my best friend but someone I consider family. I can't even imagine my life without Miss T now, it's like finding someone who is a long-lost sister, who understands me better than I know myself at times. I don't think there are enough words or phrases to express how much I truly appreciate her and her friendship, and I hope for many more months of enjoyment in our hyperfixations and the things we enjoy. <3

◈　@goldenfists　 ⋯　 Joo was such a surprise. We started talking over small plotting, and then suddenly, we bonded so deeply. Joo is a sweetheart and I love getting to talk to her about everything, from real life to plotting to so much more. Joo has a heart of gold, and I truly hope she gets to have so much more this year; new friends, new adventures, and I hope I get to be there to share it. <3

◈　@gauntlets-shot　 ⋯　 Royal is absolutely a sweet lady! While we do not talk often, I can say that she is one of the people I never get tired of seeing on my dash. I think she is doing amazing things with her college schooling. I always love getting to spaz on Discord about our stuff. <3

◈　@decidentia　 ⋯　 I have known Puffin long before I joined the League of legends fandom. I think it's going on a year in a half now that I have known her. She's a mom, I'm a mom, and we are both stressed with kids and life. I think she's one of the few people who understand the struggles of parenthood because she's always one too <3 Honestly, I would follow Puffin anywhere, because not only do I love her writing, but she as a person is a sweetheart. I really do hope for great things for you this year. <3

◈　@jynxd　 ⋯　 My empathic buddy <3 It's only been a few months, but Bli is amazing. they are sweet and kind, but easily understand my hyperfixations and excitement over things. Bli has so much in their mind and I love how they easily understand my mind thought processes and get just as excited over plots. I love our trio <3

◈　@ofspvrta　 ⋯　 Ikaros is someone I have known for..... three years now. Man, I can't believe it's been that long!!! They have my love of Assassin's Creed. I haven't written in the fandom in a long time, but it still has been our linking connection that made our friendship blossom! I don't regret anything, and now they are one of my closest friends through thick and thin. I don't have my other friend's url, Apis, but these two are probably my longest-known friendships from Tumblr who are still on Tumblr. We've been through so much and still, we hold strong <3

◈　@playgroundmonsters　 ⋯　 Ama is the sweetest, she has such a good heart and a good soul despite what the world throws at her. We both have similar struggles but she's been such a joy to have in my life and I have no regrets. From our threads to our talks, I hope I can continue to be here to help her as she has helped me. I'll always need her in my life <3

◈　@blackrosesmatron　 ⋯　 Lucy has so much love for her muses and her OC. She came out of nowhere and now I'm just like 'Yes, she is mine imma keep her' when I got to talking to her about Angelica. Lucy is such a sweet lady, she loves her muses as much as I love mine (if not more!) and I'm always happy to get to write with her. I hope things continue to get bigger and better for her.

There are many more of you that I follow, though, that I appreciate and I truly hope that 2024 offers you opportunities and great things to come your way. I hope your health stays well and that everything you need is given to you. Never forget how important you are. I listed everyone I follow below, its a small list (I only have 30 of you guys XD)

@knifvd, @piltover-sharpshooter, @torntruth, @demacianhcart, @weavertali, @deadn30n, @elicertis, @valhiir, @naitfall, @runes-menagerie, @zaunseye, @rebelquilledl, @realmyths, @sheavoid, @spectrophobias, @lowlifetopfloor, @mcnagerie

[shiawasekai]

For Nela!

2. How do they feel about Areelu Vorlesh?

8. What do they desire the most?

26. Did they separate from any companions? Why? (Consider killing a companion too for this question)

Thank you for much for the questions, Dujour!

2. How do they feel about Areelu Vorlesh?

The most vicious and (self-)destructive mix of love and hatred.

Plainly put, Nela herself hates Areelu for taking her entire life. What she did is, emotionally, not different from razing her entire hometown and murdering her family. It's worse in a way, even. Yes, she didn't personally kill them; but Areelu took away her home, her culture, everything she knew and understood from her. Areelu took years of her life, her own self changed irreversibly by aging (both physically and mentally). The world has shifted beyond what Nela can recognize. Her family spent their entire lives thinking she died and she'll never get the chance to correct them. Her parents died thinking she was gone.

Areelu destroyed more than words can express, and Nela understandably despises the woman who did it.

And yet, the experiment was a success. A part of Areelu's child lives within Nela, and that part loves her mother. It disgusts Nela, to feel such a thing for that woman, but she cannot stop it. For two souls that so easily coexist in the diminished state of the child's, that's the one true point of conflict.

Guilt and disgust tend to appear whenever Nela pays these feelings any mind, and the results are never pretty.

8. What they desire the most?

For most of the game? Going back home.

It's impossible, but the desire is made all the stronger because it cannot be fulfilled. There is nowhere to return after the Crusade is over. Everyone else gets to return to their lives before, or set forth to fulfill their dreams. Her dreams, her life before, they're gone.

Moving on feels like a betrayal. Even when Nela starts to build a new life in Mendev, there is the knowledge that this life wouldn't be even possible if she hadn't lost what came before. She wouldn't have met any of them.

I've mentioned it before, but if she was truly forced to choose knowingly between her life before and her life after? For most of the game, she would choose the life before. It would be a hard choice, yes, but one she would take nevertheless. It's one of the reasons it's so hard for her to talk about her issues with others: it means confessing she would abandon them if given the chance. It eats her inside, especially with some of the companions.

Let's leave the romance aside. Saying to Woljif, who considers her after his companion quest his first friend, that she would just leave him behind like that? To Arueshalae, for who she has been such a great support? "Yes, I would leave you to your devices and possibly fail your redemption to have my life back"? Screw your brother, Sosiel. I'm out of here.

It's selfish, it's ugly. She just cannot say it to them. Even when her feelings start to change into something more nuanced, as she grows to love these people, she knows the truth about herself. She knows what she wants most.

26. Did they separate from any companions? Why?

Wenduag dies in Act 3. I had trouble figuring out how Nela would feel about Wenduag for quite long. Nela believes in redemption, but she isn't a fool about it and won't compromise the Crusades for it. Wenduag has obvious reasons to do what she does, you could think there is a chance at redemption. Wouldn't it make sense for Nela to give it to her?

The thing is: Nela despises Wenduag for very personal reasons. In Wenduag, Nela sees who she could have become if she had listened to those darker instincts that one time. If she hadn't pushed back against her fear and decided to risk her life to save those slaves. Sacrificing others without a second thought for power, for knowledge.

Nela cannot believe in Wenduag's redemption, and doesn't want to either. The idea of having her around is simply beyond what she can tolerate anyway, so I won't say it eats at her conscience.

The other companion to "separate," as in die, is Camellia.

This time wasn't out of hate, but it wasn't out of the goodness of her heart either. As I said before, Nela doesn't expect perfect morality from the Crusaders or her companions, to do so would be foolish. What she expects them is to not be an active problem.

After what happens in Act 3, Nela cannot trust Camellia. The waste on resources trying to keep her watched would be ridiculous, and pointless given the mythic powers. It would be an active issue and a constant source of worries. Nela is knowledgeable enough to notice something is off with Camellia's explanation but, even if Mireya were real, Nela would still have no way to ensure Camellia sticks to only pre-approved targets.

In other words, Camellia becomes a liability that only makes her life harder and hinders the Crusade. Nela does wonder sometimes if she did the right thing, if there was an alternative way... but she also knows that Camellia had way too much power for the risk to be worth the potential salvation.

[waverly-locke]

» 𝐖𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐲 𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐧 𝐋𝐨𝐜𝐤𝐞 «

𝙱𝚊𝚜𝚒𝚌𝚜 ↴ ⌧ Location: Los Angeles, California  ⌧ Birthday: August 6, 1988 ⌧ Occupation: Private Investigator (Owner of Operation Waverly with over 12 years experience.)

𝙱𝚊𝚌𝚔𝚐𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚍 ↴ It’s common to believe that money can solve anything amongst those in the pursuit of it. However, for those shrouded in financial freedom, they know that this is entirely untrue. The Lockes were no different to this rule. Money opened many doors for the family when others insisted that it was impossible. As a young boy, Waverly was taught the ways of a businessman before he learned to ride a bike or tie his own shoes. A conversation with his father was always baiting him into a life lesson. This all changed after Abigail Locke went missing. Abigail Locke was the second and youngest child. 

Christian and Rose dreamed of having the perfect family. Two children, a boy and a girl. And for their son to be the oldest was an absolute sign of fate. The Lockes saw this as a sign of good fortune and for the first eight years of their daughter’s life, it was. Waverly was hassled by his father of course but he knew that it was preparation for the future and stayed obedient. Abigail was doted on by everyone in the family. Rose said time and again that God had taken part of her soul and gave it to her daughter. They were soulmates—always one with the other or in search of their other half. 

Waverly was eleven when his baby sister went missing. Their parents surprised them with a trip to a popup carnival. The kids were over the moon. They paired off as they always did. Waverly with their dad and Abigail with their mom. This was how it always was. No one thought that this was the start of a terrible sequence of events. Did fate have a hand in this? 

Waverly was over by the dunking station. He had three chances to dunk the man who had goggles on, his trunks drenched in water from earlier submerges. “Now keep your eye on your target,” Christian told him, already delivering a life lesson. But this was as far as it went. Somehow through the noise of the carnival and the laughter and commotion of the attendees, they heard the earth shattering scream of Rose Locke. At the age of eleven, Waverly knew that something horrible had happened. Things started moving in slow motion—his father was already ahead of him, he tried to move but it felt like he was in wet cement. He tried to run faster. 

When he caught up to his dad, Christian was consoling Rose. Waverly searched around them for his sister but she was nowhere to be found. “She’s gone! She’s gone! My baby! Someone took my baby!” The pain in Rose’s voice was indescribable but it broke Waverly’s heart and he started crying at once. Christian started screaming, “Has anybody seen my daughter?!”

Waverly ran as fast as he could, looking behind booths and tight spaces where she might be hiding. “Have you seen my sister?” He asked every person he passed, tears steadily streaming down his face. “Abigail. She’s eight. She has dark hair and blue eyes. She’s wearing a pink dress!” He kept this going. Asking everyone. He didn’t stop. Even when blue lights began flashing all around the area as the police came. 

And this was when the Lockes learned that money is worthless when it matters most. Tirelessly, they searched for Abigail for weeks with no sign of who took her. And then it happened, just weeks before Waverly’s birthday, they received the dreaded call. And life for the Lockes changed forever. His parents split up within three months. Rose fell into a deep depression that drained the life from her entirely. Christian became an alcoholic and soon lost his job. The once proud man now lives off government assistance. At twelve, Waverly became the caretaker for his parents. 

This painful loss led him to become a private investigator. His only hope is to help those that the police cannot. He never wants anyone to experience the devastating impact of losing someone forever. He works hard and fast in pursuit of missing persons all while searching for his sister’s killer. 

𝙿𝚎𝚛𝚜𝚘𝚗𝚊𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚢 ↴ ✔ — analytical, generous, persistent   ✘ — disorganized, obsessive, restless

[btheleaf]

Hey I was enjoying a cup of tea when I got the idea out of nowhere to ask you about your OC Nova. Can you tell me just everything?

The drawing is by @novaae thanks again, friend. The other one is one of those picrew things.

Nova

He/they

Northern Water Tribe

Master healer

Grade-A poker face

Kind of a sassy cunt

Makes bad decisions if it'll help their patients

Nova is a waterbender and healer who joined the United Forced when they were very young. They had a life-long career just like our man Bumi and have had an on and off fling with Commander Bumi post-transition.

Whenever the two of them have the same posting, they be fucking.

Nova's seen and been through some Terrible Things. Y'know how Bumi was scared of cannibals in the fog of lost souls? Nova was on that mission with him. Things Did Not Go Well. I've dubbed that mission, "The Nachoka Island Incident."

Nova never abandons their patients, much to Bumi's dismay. The commander has had to do A LOT of paperwork to clean up the messes Nova makes fighting to keep their charges under their care. Nova regularly doesn't board the ship or will be accompanied by unauthorized personnel if it means seeing their patient through to recovery.

Bumi is smitten with them. Nova doesn't understand how someone can have a heart made of gold like Bumi does.

Nova is a power bottom, and Bumi LOVES it. Bumi gets the sense of being in charge because he's topping, but with Nova calling all the shots, he also gets to relinquish control for a little while.

The crew catches them fucking all the time because they're two of the highest-ranking officers on the ship and they Do Not Care about sneaking away. When they get a moment together, they're using that moment to its full potential.

The crew lets them get away with all the messy sex because they know that with Bumi in charge and Nova as the ship's master healer, they'll all come home from missions.

Nova is a savage when it comes to sparring. People often underestimate them because they have long hair and he's "just a healer," 💀 but they know how to kill and won't be pushed around by anyone.

Nova retired at the same time as Bumi, and they both decided to give their relationship a proper chance to be something more than it was while Nova was under Bumi's command.

Their role in the AU @dont-blame-it-on-the-kids and I have designed was to be an emergency add-on to the healing team of Katara and Kya. They were originally going to take Tenzin as a charge, but the cards fell in a way that made them Lin and Pema's healer instead.

Their face is impossible to read unless they trust someone implicitly. They liberally use tough love during therapy to those who need it.

[helenreads28]

Lee Rang Full Gumiho

Hello my beautiful people. I still haven't finished totnt 1938 but as I said in a previous post I have stumbled upon a lot of spoilers. So here's my take on Rang achieving to believe in himself and acquiring the powers of a full Gumiho in that era, but still being a half fox in 2020.

So basically, my thought process is the most basic. Our lovely mermaid died a tragic death, one that Rang coudn't prevent and lost total trust in himself and his abilities. His relationship with Yeon 1938 might have become strained again, since we see Rang be so cruel to him in 2020; they might have got into a fight. Maybe when Rang and our lovely mermaid were trying to survive, the young fox called for his hyung, but said hyung never showed up.

The outcome? Yeohee dies, with Rang probably being held by the people responsible, forcing him to watch as they kill the love of his life in front of him. How they take her scales in order to sell them and gain money; and Rang?

Rang is left more broken than ever before. Even as a full fox he wasn't able to protect the woman he loved, and still loves. Yeon never showed up to help him, no matter that they had made amends. The promise that he would protect him, that he would be there if he ever needed him is once again broken. And he is left there, in a world without the people he holds dear; with one of them brutally murdered and the other nowhere to be found. Alone in a cruel world whose only purpose is to make Rang's life as miserable as possible.

So he gives up, if life is only going to be cruel to him, then be it. He is going to be as cruel as he can too. An eye for an eye; there's no purpose in his life anymore, no purpose to keep his aching hurt beating, no purpose other that revenge, other than making the world suffer as mush as he has.

Somewhere along the way, he finds a new purpose; he finds a new family. One who finally accepts him the way he is, one who is happy to see him happy and healthy. Sadly, it seems that life has other plans and his brother gives his life for his beloved. Yeon does what Rang wasn't able to do, what he wasn't strong enough to do; and he has to give it to Yeon. In the end, he did exactly what he was out to do ever since Ah-Eum sacrificed herself for his sake.

Apart from Yeon being able to do what Rang couldn't, he also forces Rang to be the one to take his life. And there Rang is, being the one responsible for the deaths of the two most important people in his life. How could he ever move forward from that?

So when he gets the chance, he offers his life in exchange for his brother's. He at least manages to repent for one of his sins and give his brother more time with his loved ones than Rang had and craved. And somewhere deep in his mind, in his soul and in his heart, he is aware he is also sacrificing himself for Ji-Ah's sake as well. Because he knows what it's like to lose the person you love the most and be forced to keep living without them. It's a thought he never shares with the world, not even when he is so close to his death. Then, he is gone with the world ignorant to his kind, loving and protective self. He was always a martyr afterall, and martyrs never get a happy ending.

Bonus: The people who killed Yeo-hee are the people responsible for bringing the Imoogi back. The purpose of her murder? To break Rang in such a way that he will be more easily manipulated, that he will be at their mercy. He already owes them his life afterall...

[akocomyk]

VII

This warrior once had a head. Now, he was desperately clinging onto a pike where his head was skewered, striving hard to reattach it to his body. He had been a brave man who served the king with all his might and did everything in his honor. No one could ever argue with his strength and true-born talent on the battlefield.

Not so long ago, he fought in a war in the name of his beloved kingdom. He had promised himself that this would not be his last battle. He swung his sword here and there, filling his ears with the sound of clanging metal that sounded like music to him.

Then, in one unfortunate move, he lost his grip on his weapon. A warrior from the opposing faction saw this chance, lifted his sword, and decapitated him.

Hearing the Acephalous Warrior’s one last promise to himself, the Sorcerer pitied him. When the fighting ceased, the enchanter went to his side and offered a way that could bring him back to the perfect man he was before—with a given condition.

The condition was this: he had to be able to touch his head, which was skewered on a pike, within the four days given to him to be supernaturally alive.

However, this condition was never as easy as it seemed. For the warrior, the pike was longer than it appeared, and the head was higher than he anticipated. The simple touch and reach of his arm had turned into an endless climb.

For a time, he still kept on. He wanted to live. He yearned to be back at the well—back at the warmth of the Princess’ embrace—and just stay at the quiet calm of the castle’s gardens. He missed her touch and the smell of her skin that awakened the fires of his heart, body, and soul. He wanted to go back to exploring the wonders of her wonderland.

Yet even with all that longing in his heart, he acted as if he wasn’t strong enough. Two days had already passed, and the Warrior’s hands were nowhere near his head. Upon realizing how difficult it would be, he soon grew tired and lazy of the condition given to him. With every hour that passed, he lost an ounce of hope, slowly accepting his prolonged demise.

Strong he was in the battlefield, yet he was now fainthearted in achieving a better life.

Eventually, his time went up. He succumbed to his incessant lack of faith.

☆ ☆ ★ ☆ ☆

[onelonelyghostt]

TMA OC (version 2)

Statement of Charley, a helpline operator. On a series of strange phone calls they received.

Statement given 11th of March , 2016

Statement Begins

Thank you for letting me write down my story. I appreciated the opportunity when you invited me in and gave me then pen and paper to give my "statement", but I'm not sure if you'll recall. I wonder, will you... forget that I wrote this and think that the paper was written in error? Or perhaps you'll forget that I was even there, and assume that this piece of paper … this statement came out of nowhere, making me seem unimportant. It could be my own fault for not being memorable, now I've had a chance. I'll try to make sure I'm more memorable in the future. I've been working as a suicide helpline operator for a few years now. It's not an easy job, but I do it because I believe that everyone deserves to be heard, even if they don't think they matter. In the beginning, I thought that just answering calls and providing a listening ear would be enough. I wanted to be a beacon of hope for those in need, and maybe even save a life or two. But as time passed, I realized that it wasn't that simple. Most of the calls I get are from people who feel like nobody cares about them. They're convinced that if they disappeared, nobody would even notice. And the worst part is, sometimes they're right. I've lost count of how many times I've talked to someone and then...they're just gone. It's like they've vanished into thin air. Nobody reports them missing, nobody seems to care that they're gone. It's like they were never really here at all. It's hard to explain how that makes me feel. Sometimes I'm angry, sometimes I'm just numb. But most of the time, I'm just...lonely. It's a strange thing, feeling so disconnected from the people I talk to every day. I can't help but wonder what happens to them once we hang up. Do they feel better? Or do they just sink deeper into despair? And then there are the ones who don't call back. The ones who just...disappear. It's like they were already halfway gone before they even picked up the phone. It's a lot to deal with, and sometimes it feels like there's no point in even trying. But I can't give up. I won't give up. Because as long as there's even one person out there who needs me, I have to keep trying. I have to keep fighting, no matter how hopeless it seems. But some calls leave an imprint on my soul, even though I thought I'd heard everything. It's like the despair and hopelessness are so tangible, they seep into me and make me feel like I'm the one teetering on the edge. I try to give them hope, to make them see that they're not alone, but sometimes it feels like I'm talking to a void. And when they disappear without a trace, I wonder if I failed them. But there's one number that haunts me more than any other. The voice on the other end was so familiar, so filled with pain, but I couldn't place it. I listened, trying to offer any shred of comfort, but as soon as the call ended, I knew. It was my own voice on the line.

I don't know how or why, but I was calling myself, begging for help. And now I can't shake the feeling that I'm the one who needs saving. It kept happening. Once I'd reached the point where Id finally forgotten. Where I was finally free from being haunted. The phone would ring, and the voice that echoed out my throat was the same that replied though the receiver. I asked, begged, pleaded with the voice. I wanted to know what they wanted, what they needed, how I could help.... but no reply. Every call was weaker too. Not just the voice mimicking my words, but the quality of it too. Like it was getting further and further out of reach. Till it was just nothing but dead air. I know what your going to say, that I'm mad. I promise that I am not. Depressed? yes, but not mad. I'm not sure when the calls stopped but they did, and that's when things got …worse. It's like I just woke up dead one day... [nervous chuckle] You know that feeling when you say something out loud but nobody responds? Like you're just a ghost floating around. Maybe you do, I know I do. I fear being forgotten. It's a haunting feeling that makes me want to scream and shatter everything in sight. I wish to obliterate the memories of myself and trample on them until they're reduced to dust. However, it seems that I've already been erased from people's minds. Despite my efforts to be remembered, I continue to fade away. It's a lonely experience, and I empathize with those who have also been forgotten. So if you're out there, listening to me now, know that you're not alone. Even the ones who answer the calls need someone to talk to. Don't give up hope, and please, please, don't vanish like I did.

[sigh] Statement Ends... I suppose.