#unfortunately im probably going to go for the american one because i dont have a lot of shit

[severalowls]

Was looking for a decent chicken curry recipe since I got a bunch of bits that need using up and sooo many recipe sites are white suburban types:

British: Add one teaspoon of mild curry powder and maybe a pinch of cayenne pepper if you want to feel the heat!

American: You may be asking "what is a curry", but if you're willing to try a scary alien flavour profile... Here is an affiliate link to "paprika".

[unnonexistence]

an important writing question to ask yourself is "how much time and effort do i want to put into figuring out what this character's legal documents would look like"

[thatdeadaquarius]

-vine boom

I probably sent a lot of these now im so sorry lmfao 😅

You mentioned in one of the asks that some countries are like a prototype/based of our existing countries, like Germany=Mondstadt, Liyue=China, Inzauma=Japan....

So even though the language is more or less identical for you to make heads and tails in a conversation or writing in a book, the reverse side does not.

Creator!Reader who knows a couple of languages (plus points if they're atleast fluent or have a understanding of it despite not being able to speak said language) and being born from a country that doesnt have the same language as the countries Teyvat based off. Basically Spanish, Italian, Filipino, Scandinavian languages that also have their own way of writing.

Imagine feeling homesick and the only thing that keeps you occupied is the notebook and pen you have while the others converse in a meeting or in a hangout. You started writing in your tongue and re-reading it to relive memories.

Zhongli, AlHaitham, Albedo, Jean, maybe the Berry bros too (Diluc & Kaeya) get curious only to have a double-take and immediately thinks that maybe there is a forgotten land in Teyvat that has this language, I mean Morax stayed faithful to Liyue and Barbatos blessed his country with abundance of supplies and freedom. Teyvat gods and archons played favourites, so why wouldn't you as well? (Bonus: Khaenriah flashbacks) (also I know these arent enough characters but how should I know? I only have a handful of them and I ran out of Primos😭

The people from Akademiya though? I mean they went hard on theorizing and picking apart the language of their creator. Have you seen Matpat's descent to insanity the more FNAF continues to push out LoRe? Thats basically them because Teyvat doesn't have a country based on Creator's birth country. They're grasping nothing but air and dead ends and the only lead they have is you, but couldnt ask because you look so down and they cant bear to see Creator sad....

(NEW BANNER TOMORROW AND I DONT HAVE ENOGH PRIMOGEMS HALP---)

Rip Vine boom no primos 🙏 hope u got some more by this time bc i was so late to reply lol - DUDE IM SO READY FOR THE GORG KAVEH <333

BERRY BROS!! Thats it, thats the only way im gonna refer to them now.

Not super long to add onto ur bc UR SO SMART AND SUCH A GOOD WRITER VINEBOOM U SHOULD ALSO WRITE STUFF SO I CAN GO OBSESS OVER UR WRITING WITH A MILLION FERAL COMMENTS-!!!

(Cute owl house gif is like, metaphorially u and zhongli in this lol)

EDIT 8/23/23: So this may be inaccurate/not that good to my Hispanic Readers out there! Sorry about that, I'l make sure to do better in the future.

EDIT 1/1/24: Unfortunately there are even more issues here, and I'm really sorry about that. I expanded on it more in my Eldritch fanfic post in Part 2, but it was exoticism of me to use the word "Huangdi". I have since replaced it with "Emperor", and don't intend to just erase the mistake like it never happened. But I did change it in the headcanons for better readability. Again, I'm genuninely sorry about this, and will absolutely be watching out/doing better in the future. I hope you understand.

THIS SOUNDS SO SAD, LIKE THIS COULD DEF BE ANGST, ESP SINCE U HAVE NO FAMILIAR-ISH CULTURE TO TURN TO-

tbh im american and i def dont think theres a u.s. country- oh god at least I hope not, damn but im also familiar with mexican culture so i wouldnt miss the united states, but id miss mexican culture…

BUT!!

You have a lot of amazing people who care about you in Teyvat, so they won’t let you stew in ur homesickness for long

like random said, i could see it being small stuff

ok so imma just-

LATINO! READER TIME BABBYYYYY

(i do this bc its just the culture/language im more familiar with, but dont let that discourage anyone from requesting other cultures! I will def do my research, or ur welcome to tell me all about it so i can write it better! <3)

THAT BEING SAID IM MOSTLY WHITE PLS LMK IF SHIT IS WRONG/SPANISH IS WRONG BC IM STILL A BEGINNER MY BELOVED LATINES!

<3 YOU GUYS

♡

you’ve been in the game-turned-life world of Genshin Impact for nearly 6 months now, turns out time isnt wonky as hell like it is if you were playing the game, half bc u bribed Albedo with answers to his many questions about you if he figured out the time difference, and half bc of ur internal clock

people would notice the cuss words first lmao

like Xiao hearing u stubbing ur toe on the million and one steps up to Wangshu Inn, hijueputa!

or Keqing pointing out the words you coo at the dogs hanging out by the bridge outside the harbor,

un perrito tan buenoooo!! :’)

while most would just, " hmm, maybe a dialect of one of the other countries we havent heard…"

but Zhongli? he’s been ready for centuries in case the prophecy came true within his lifetime, afterall, many things changed while he’s been alive, not crazy to him that you might descend randomly

While everyone else was unprepared, bc u were like… the oldest deity, more legend than history, so ppl just thought Morax was a little overly faithful …so when it actually happened,, Morax was just smirking as he watched ur golden shooting star streak the night sky… while absolute pandemonium consumed the mortals and adepti in liyue lmao

(like that scene of Regina George in Mean Girls watching the student body break out into an all out brawl just smirking 😭 pls god look it up if u dont know what i mean- )

So Morax- Zhongli, has been ready for you, just in case, to pay attention to what kind of person you’d be, learn your favorite clothes/colors/offerings, see what things you’d like to talk about with him (hopefully for hours) etc.

He was observant, and with his memory, he practically gave himself headaches sometimes with how aware he was,

on one of those days he was overwhelmed by the mortal crowds, the smells, the market yelling, and all the change from what he thought he knew-

Zhongli noticed you in your own melancholy, and curious, he began to stroll just behind

You sit at Wanmin restaurant, still somber, and ask Xiangling to

“please try out these recipes? they’re from my world, and id really love to have something like them again..”

a true experimental chef as always, Xiangling quickly takes up your offer, and u follow her into the kitchens in the back (the restaurant is much more real than in game, they have gorgeous inside seating, all shades of red coloring the walls and lots of pretty latticework-)

Zhongli takes a seat finally, he has a usual table at this point he comes in so much coughtorunintoyoucough the staff know it's his and give him tea pretty quickly

the food, and the looks, makes it your favorite restaurant in Liyue, the Liuli Pavilion a little too fancy for casual dining, afterall, Zhongli would know

He’s tried to keep track of your favorite places to be in Liyue too, and kept his near full attention on what you say when he asks after your stays in Liyue (he hasn’t felt the need to pay that much attention or felt that much interest in conversation partners in… decades?)

So when you come out of the kitchen, throwing your head back and laughing, "Sí, sí! It all tastes so close Xiangling! Gracias, thank you!"

He wants… to know.

to know what those strange, but delicious looking, foods are all balanced on two big dinner plates

Xiangling carrying whatever you couldn’t just behind, a pitcher of white liquid, it smells, like cinnamon?

He raises a hand, and offers the extra seats at his table, (when did his tea go cold? he only just sat down, he couldn’t have spent that long thinking about you…)

You notice and look over, a giddy grin lighting up your face (…hmm, perhaps he needs to transform into his Exuvia form and let off some steam, his chest has warmed too much right now for him to just be sitting here…)

You plop into the seat beside him, but not before carefully placing the plates in front of both you and Zhongli

You scootch around until you’re turned towards him, as always, Zhongli looks… actually kind of, happy?

a small soft smile pulls at his lips, his eyes half-lidded as they meet yours, his usual red eyeliner framing his monolids perfectly, he looks like he’s been,, well, sculpted from stone, an artwork come to life

“…My Emperor? Could I trouble you to tell me about the dishes before us?”

the geo god’s pleasantly smooth and deep voice felt so soft asking you that, like he didn’t want to push you one direction or the other

“Oh! Right! Sorry, these are from my home country, back in my world, or at least, as close as Xiangling and I can get to them!”

Your smile brightens your face once more, clearing away any leftover stormclouds from your mood earlier, and as you launch into explaining (Xiangling had to get back to orders, so it’s just you two now)

You list it all, the quintessential: quesadillas, empanadas, tamales, chorizo (you had to combine at least 5 different spices to Mondstadt sausages to get anywhere close to the real thing) the dips obviously, salsa, queso, guacamole, and the easy street tacos, and finally the horchata, but also all the weird fruits Teyvat has with chile, like Sunsettias mixed with Harra from Sumeru or Lavender melons with Wolfhook berries… all surpringly pretty good

(the Sun-Harra combo tastes like mango, a sort of deeper taste of pineapple/kiwi and a sort of light orange taste? all with the nice addition of chile flavors, the Lavender melons and Wolfhooks helped imitate chamoy enough that your heart was satisfied)

…you realize you’ve just been talking about the last meal you had with your family/friends instead of the food after a bit, and Zhongli hasn’t said anything…

you trail off and look back over your shoulder (u were practically about to get your shirt in the imitation guac u were leaning so far over the table to point and talk)

you’re about to sheepishly apologize for taking over the conversation, and ask if he wants to try anything (Zhongli can handle spice so u dont have to worry abt that at least)

but as u finally see his face, u just stop, and dont end up saying anything

He’s just, looking at you.

his smile's not huge, but big enough to make his eyes look happy, and Zhongli’s just… looking at you.

You can’t describe the look he’s giving you, but you suddenly feel… a wave of shyness wash over your heart in your chest, because he’s looking almost like, maybe like, he’s sort of, waiting for you to keep talking, his tan skin warm in the golden rays of the sun beginning to set, you don’t know why you’re noticing any of these things, and he gently, slowly, makes a move to lean into your space a little

almost above your armrest, head inches from your shoulder, he finally moves to stop looking at you-

He looks like a painting as he looks down, his eyelashes almost sitting on his high cheekbones,

you have to move your head to looking at the table too as he moved so close,

you feel your shoulders reflexitively hitch upwards as you brushed the hair on the side of his head as you turned away

He looks around, and then moves his head, not his body, he’s still leaning toward you, to look you right in the eyes again

“Why did you stop? I haven’t said much, I apologize, but it’s only because I wanted to hear you without anything interrupting you.”

You cough a little strained, “Oh! Oh I get it now yeah, thanks-”

“I want to hear you more,” his black eyes begin to warm with gold, you can vaguely see the shape of his diamond pupil revealing itself, “I want to hear about… everything, if you’ll tell me? The language, the food, the drinks, your family, your dances, your country, I want to hear it all. Won’t you please let me hear your voice some more?”

♡

GOOOD LOOORDDDD, ITS SO LONGGGGG IM SO SORRRYYY 😭😭

OKAY IM MOSTLY SORRY THAT THIS SCENARIO HAPPENED??? IDK WHERE ZHONGLI CAME FROM- GOD IM SUBCONCIOUSLY IN LOVE WITH THAT MAN I GUESS, SORRY RANDOMANTICS-

uh, hope somebody got anything out of this, sorry abt the length, again,

also pls somebody tell me if what i said about culture/food was alright! If not I’ll def change it, pls dont let me keep it up if its inaccurate/wrong!!

Safe Travels you guys,

💀♒️

.°•.☆.•°.

♡ the beloveds ♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk

[sometipsygnostalgic]

Due to a series of unfortunate events (a cancellation of all direct flights for 2 days), im going to be spending between 90 minutes and three hours in IRELAND of all places. The REPUBLIC of Ireland. I was not expecting this on my american adventure.

I wont get to do any irish things but im flying both flights with Aer Lingus instead of British Airways.

Here is my review of Aer Lingus which is by extension my review of Ireland:

- Holy SHIT this airbus is half the size of the boeing i was going to take. I expected it to have insane turbulence like the KLM washing machines but honestly it's no different to the boeing

- it is nice to hear announcements made in a celtic language first again, even if it's Gaelic and not Cymraeg. I look forward to seeing the "Casnewydd/Newport" sign when i finally take the train home, it's the first symbol of being in Wales.

- We left early. EARLY. On one hand this is leagues above all my BA flights that have never left on time. On the other hand if it left just 60 seconds late, id have recieved a free change of transfer plane. Now i gotta hope we get there "early" enough for me to get through customs and find my next flight. Better prepare to run but theres not much i can do about this. I just hope British Airways dont force me to pay for a rebooked flight because they decided 60 minutes international transfer time was enough (hah!) and i dont have superhuman speed.

- Im sat by an emergency exit. This has funny side effects. I get sliiiightly more leg room, but also im sat by the exit and the door is way, way colder than any other wall in the plane. It's not bothersome but it's funny how i have a free Cooling Wall.

- Internet is about same price as BA and i can use discord (good) but i cant use youtube (very bad, you should probably only go for for the im service)

- The dinner was about the same quality as the British airways food, but they had TWO meat options instead of one. I took the Beef Stew. Very yummy. They had cheese and tomato on the side instead of the cursed tomato couscous yoghurt that looks like strawberry muesli which british airways keep serving (prison food). I also really liked the chocolate mousse, slightly easier to eat than the chocolate brownie i get with BA, but i find it weird aer lingus serve most of their drinks in tiny cartons. Why??? At least i get a tiny water bottle with BA, like a souvenir. Also theres a tinier bread roll and no cheese with it, but the cheese felt out of place anyway. Not as out of place as the tiny creamer pot i get on both airlines, with no coffee in sight. It's like a shot.

- you dont get any free alcohol on this flight, you have to pay for your 1 can can of lager. With a credit card. Mine was in the overhead locker. Thankfully a guy on my aisle was feeling generous and bought my can. Downgrade from BA including 2 alcoholic drinks in the flights

- instead of a nice pasty or bacon egg roll for breakfast they gave me a tiny carton of orange juice and a Nature Valley granola bar. Horrible

- the in flight entertainment is on a screen from 2009 instead of 1999. There is no funny controller that stops working randomly. It is a normal ass touch screen. Unfortunately i lost my provided earbuds at the start of the flight so i havent done anything with it

- no reclining chair on this airbus :( it's an overnight flight. My chair is missing an arm but i assume thats because it is by the emergency exit

- BA do this thing where they dim the lights and turn them back on an hour before arrival. Aer Lingus have decided to "dim" the lights by having these purple lights on, instead of turning them off.

More to come when i arrive at the airport

[determinate-negation]

i know new york being the ancestral homeland of jews is a joke but as a jew from europe it literally feels that way. like i cannot imagine like a whole street written in hebrew. like i want to go there just to see that. i dont think jews inthe united states are aware of how good they have it

i do want to note that america is also a settler colonial state and its only because of specific american aims of the settler project and material realities of the economy and the physical land they were trying to settler that theyve had this “melting pot” ideology where jews were incorporated similarly to italian and irish immigrants, instead of continuing to have deeply ingrained religious and cultural antisemitism like europe. there were in some periods of us history more restrictions on jewish immigration and some institutional barriers for jews, especially before and during ww2, but never to the same degree as europe. although american jews were rarely (if ever, i dont know any examples but there could be some) violent genocidal settlers like the anglos and generally migrated later, we were still settlers searching for economic interests provided by american expansion on native land. that being said were here now and have the status of any other american settler (meaning people who arent indigenous or descended from enslaved people brought here against their will) most indigenous theorists and activists maintain that they want sovereignty, reparations, companies to stop destroying native land, etc, not every american settler to leave. i really believe that the united states also must fall, but i dont think this makes us like not belonging, at least any more than the other settlers.

i just want to say this to explain that my love for new york and the east coast us is complex. objectively the multicultural and cosmopolitan aspects of nyc that make it unique are products of american imperialism– for example nyc is the most linguistically diverse city in the world! over 600 languages are spoken here, including languages that arent spoken anywhere else anymore, but think about why that is. and the flourishing of jewish communities and culture in parts of the us was a product of specific historic processes and policies, and we like any other descendants of settler-immigrants have to grapple with that. i think its possible to oppose and fight against american imperialism and settler colonialism and still deeply appreciate the contradictory aspects of culture in america. (which lbr all the dynamic and interesting and worth preserving things about american culture were not created by anglos, but by outsiders and oppressed people) anyways this is all just to say im really not coming at it from a nationalist perspective but a diaspora perspective but yeah, new york is such a jewish city its genuinely incredible. this is why i especially despise tri state area zionists... youre ignoring that you live in the greatest place in the world for jews. literally the most jewish city in the world. like theres a moving company called schleppers here, yiddish words are part of everyones dialect, you can get the best jewish food everywhere from delis that are like 100 years old, we literally have a truck called the mitzvah tank that chabad drives around and asks people on the street if theyre jewish. the only romaniote synagogue in the western hemisphere is here and they have a greek jewish festival every year (which unfortunately is always covered in israeli flags -_-) the whole foods by one of my work sites had a sign up for yom kippur catering because the neighborhood is so jewish.

jewish culture and history and jews in general are just part of the fabric of life in new york. also whatever street youre talking about was probably written in yiddish since thats what most of the hassidic jews speak here! nyc has the largest concentration of yiddish speakers, which isnt surprising, and its the 8th most spoken language in nyc. theres also a big and still growing bukharian community here too. if you ever can, i really recommend visiting new york. theres so much jewish culture and history here. a lot of american jews live much more isolated, so i cant speak for them, but for many parts of the north east i feel that were lucky. antisemitism exists here but idk ive grown up in pretty jewish areas and never really experienced it. europe sounds legitimately shitty. also... fun fact, netanyahu went to high school in the suburbs outside of philly

^my photos in the lower east side, and heres some photography of hassidic williamsburg too

also williamsburg

[navire190413]

haha i got drunk and wrote like 2,000 words about my experience with learning japanese. read it sober and just sat in front of my computer like 😐

you know when old people talk a lot and sometimes its hard to tell if they’re trying to pass on wisdom or are just kind of full of themselves and want to talk about themselves? what i wrote was definitely the latter. i’m just an おじいさん who wants to drink and smoke and talk about myself and my hard work lol

one of my favorite 居酒屋 to visit on my way home from work is closing for good this weekend. its open 24/7 so it was always great for stopping by after drinking at the bar until morning. their squid and shrimp 串カツ are soooo good. i’m actually here now typing this on my phone. this izakaya is in a basement so i don’t have signal. i just end up scrolling through my photos or blogging in my notes while sitting here alone for an hour until my favorite bar opens at 7.

the last time i came here a server ive become acquainted with hit on me, and i didn’t pick up on it at all, so my reaction was kind of dull. i only realized he was hitting on me when he turned around and all the other servers were laughing at him bc they were all eavesdropping. he probably mentioned he was gonna do it beforehand haha. i’m so sorry. i would be totally down to grab drinks if i realized sooner 😂

he always makes me turn around and show him my backpiece when im wearing tanktops and croptops. and hes always basically yelling カッコいい！！its cute how not normal tattoos are here. i would never get these reactions in america but sometimes it can be annoying. yes yes i have a lot of tattoos. yes. expensive. yes painful. and then they find out about my scarification, which honestly most people in the states have also never seen, so then its a weird balance of explaining my love for body modification and not self mutilation.

money has gotten TIGHT lately. im literally courting my ex and bringing him to izakayas and nice restaurants every week and im going broke from it so i gotta stop hahaha. we did have a really good time last night, though. and hes always really grateful and respectful when im paying. he also initiated a lot of kisses and kept kissing my cheeks last night which was weird and not like him at all. im not gonna think about it anymore tho.

i am super excited about where we’re going on saturday. its an 青森県 restaurant and i guess they get fish delivered daily from there, so i hope its super fresh and tasty 😤. i unfortunately booked too late and couldnt get a private room, but i think sitting at the counter will be nice since we’re doing the all-you-can-drink course and itll be faster to get our drinks if we’re not in a secluded room.

my go-to drink for the past 2 years living here has always been highballs, but lately theyre way too strong for me. ive become obsessed with lemon sours, but because its not whiskey in them like highballs i become drunk super super fast. good for cost performance purposes but dangerous since im used to my highball drinking pace. i usually dont black out if i only drink for 2-3 hours on a work night but the other day i drank my usual amount, just this time they were lemon sours and not highballs. i was on the verge of blacking out returning home at only 9pm on a monday 😂

i can’t stop thinking about the guy who asked me to be his girlfriend two weeks ago. he’s american and he’s nice enough, but he’s been living in japan for over a year and cant even say すみません to get a server’s attention. he also doesnt eat meat, so i cant introduce him to yakiniku and yakitori which are my go-to. everytime we hungout i had to translate everything and guide him around tokyo. i brought him to an izakaya for his first time and had to teach him the words for squid and octopus. which he promptly forgot 2 minutes later. its literally taco and ika!!! we got lost in a department store one time and i had to ask for directions while he just stood there. it always felt like i was with a child who knew nothing when we were together. as friends, im more than happy to introduce tokyo and translate. but as someone who was obviously trying to be appealing to me, it was honestly a massive ick. i have no preference when it comes to what ethnicity or cultural background someone is, but i cant date someone who knows less about japan than me. it was a good realization actually! i always say i dont have a type, but i think im slowly starting to realize my type. he doesnt have friends so he would always say “lets go out and explore tokyo together!”dude i have been experiencing tokyo for 2 years. i have my favourite spots and my favourite neighborhoods and i know how to find good restaurants and i regularly go out and just do shit by myself because i can navigate it by myself. he also was expecting me to teach him japanese which was just soooo….

when you get to a level where you’ve lived somewhere long enough and can speak the language a lot of people expect you to be a free tour guide. when it comes to strictly friends with no expectation of me, im more than happy to plan a day of sightseeing and introductions but sometimes when i make friends with foreigners it feels like that’s all they want out of me. i mean it goes both ways. a lot of japanese men just view me as a fetish object. omg a white girl who i can actually speak to!!! maybe she can teach me english!!! ive never fucked a 6 foot tall white girl with tattoos!!!

for my established friends, i happily translate stuff for them and give them english lessons but man it feels like theres a lot of expectations of me meeting people here. from foreigners and native japanese people.

i have a lot of foreign friends who have lived here longer than me and dont speak a lick of japanese and dont have any plans on learning. i dont really feel one way or the other about it. theyve been here long enough and know they can get around and have fun without knowing the language. i cant imagine how tough that is sometimes so more power to them. but its always the people complaining they want to learn and want to understand and communicate but still for some reason just dont sit down and study or make an effort to make japanese friends so they can atleast pick up conversational japanese that i dont understand. why are you not studying???? sure its hard but just do it??? you dont even have to use textbooks. apps kind of suck once you get past the basics but its at least something you can do while riding the train and then atleast i wouldnt have to order for you at the bar after youve been living here for several months!!!

im a princess and a brat and am obsessive so studying is super easy for me. i studying during my lunch breaks and anytime im riding the train. i understand thats not the case for everyone, so i try to take the time to teach my friends who want to learn japanese important phrases for day to day life. maybe textbooks and studying isnt their thing, which is fine. okay i’ll teach you as we go. but even then they dont retain anything 😂 dont complain to me about not being able to speak japanese if you’re not going to put in a little bit of effort to atleast order a beer by yourself!!!! and if youre over thinking the difference between ください and お願いします before you can even say [名前]と申します, youre thinking too much!!!!! japanese is hard. theres a lot of info. if you start getting into super specific japanese before you can do self introductions, its gonna be a long long road. so im super happy i learned japanese in america where i went textbook step by step instead of being surrounded by confusing japanese all day long. when i try to teach my friends japanese they always somehow ask me about n2 grammar. and its just like. stop. ignore that. that does NOT have anything to do with you at this time. i was N2 before N3 grammar even made sense to me (i did get full points on n3 test despite none of it making sense to me though 😂) because i finally had context for it and could make the connections. without those building blocks and going step by step id be lost. and thats why you should study the language before coming to a foreign country.

god im judgmental.

[kinniie00]

HEY BUDDY :D !!! lion, maine coon, american shorthair, tiger, cougar, and fishing cat !!

HIIII!!! 👾

This is so many omg

Lion - I'm probably most proud of how far I've come over the last few years, I went through a lot and am still learning to live with some of it. It's definitely shaped a bit of who I am now, but I'd like to think I have grown from it and carried it with me rather than living in that dump forever :) AND MY FRIENDS IM SO SO SO PROUD OF THEM AND HOW MUCH THEY'VE DONE AND I WISH THE BEST FOR ALL OF YOU :((

Maine Coon - Honestly I'm not too sure how others would describe me, or even how to encapsulate my personality into one word--I'd like to say I'm energetic but I also have my moments of not being as much, I'm nice but I know I can be a bitch, I'm a lot of things but I'm really unsure of what word could describe me, plus I don't remember any good descriptive words rn :') (I'm so tired)

American Shorthair - I have many things that comfort me, id say my friends are my biggest comfort, as cheesy as it is. My friends remind me I'm not alone and have reasons to keep going, even when it feels impossible. I also often tend to latch onto games and streamers/YouTubers for comfort (a big one is hermitcraft!! :D), many of the people I watch now are people who practically raised me and I love them dearly. Another few smaller things that I find help comfort me are things like music, tea, or small things like animals (my cat!!!) or stuffed animals :3

Tiger - Another one that I'm not entirely sure how to answer :( "Being cute and being mine" -☀️ I think I went through the 5 stages of grief trying to come up with something that's all you're getting, oh yeah and my worst is probably the fact that I'm indecisive or like impulsive idk

Cougar - Hehehe fandoms 😇 Definitely undertale, fnaf, and sanders sides in the later years. I was (unfortunately) an aphmau kid back in 2015 but that was more watching her content and less fandom stuff. The undertale and fnaf ones definitely didn't ever stop, I got really into sans aus back during covid and relied on all three of those fandoms for comfort during the quarantine too. Sanders sides definitely helped me over the years before and during covid, it was definitely a rough time in my life as I was learning new things about myself and others around me, and it helped me so much with learning how to be me and accept myself as I am. As for a fandom I'm really active in now, id say the one I'm most active in is Hermitcraft (so surprising!!! 🙀) I got super into it back in season 6 when grian joined because I watched his content before he joined, and now I watch most of the hermits, I do tend to focus on a few each season while watching the occasional stream/video from the others though! I also listen to the imp & skizz podcast, and I find it rather comforting when I'm stressed, I love the hermits so much and they've definitely helped me so much without even knowing :) (and the fandom is so silly I love everyone)

Fishing Cat - I have so many I'm definitely going to forget some, I love learning new things and it's led to many hobbies that I do and will probably get back into in the future! :) I do crochet, it's something I have been learning since I was really young but couldn't get the hang of it for the longest time because my mom had a hard time teaching me it since she's left handed, I love reading, I read all kinds of things from old novels & poetry, romance and mystery, to nonfiction and sci-fi, I enjoy reading anything as long as it can keep my interest, and I loveee getting reccomended books (even though my to-be-read list is SO long), I like small crafts like jewelry making but it hurts my hands (especially the more intricate ones like fancy necklaces, bracelets, earrings), i love gaming, its a big part of who I am seeing as I grew up doing it, and even though i dont it as much anymore I still enjoy it and love playing games with my friends!! I enjoy drawing, but it's stressful because I'm not great at it and am way too perfectionistic over it. I used to paint but I never got too good at it and never had proper supplies, it was very fun though and I'd definitely get back into it sometime down the line. I listen to a lot of music, and watch youtubers/streamers. I like to go on walks, but with some of my health issues I don't go on them as often (I definitely will do more this summer though!!) and hanging out with my friends and animals. I plan on getting into sewing and possibly cosplay sometime so that will be fun to learn! I love creative hobbies, despite how stressful they can be when they don't go how I wanted it to :) I love seeing things I'm able to make evolve and get better and I get better at doing it, and I love consuming information and seeing people be people!!

I'm so sorry this is a lot of yapping even for me 😭

[ccasey0]

who wants a map of all the sectors in "america"? btw, people dont actually call it america. they just refer to paces as the sectors they are in.

okay, im sure some of these you can guess. but imma name them anyway.

WS(the one with washington in it)= Washington Sector.

NS(with north dakota)= Nebraskan sector.

LS= Lake sector.

TS(with texas)= Texas Sector.

NS(with california)= Needle Sector(named after a city in california).

AS= Albuquerque Sector.

HS= Hawaiian/The Hot Sector

AWS(alaska)= American Winter Sector

FS= Flower Sector

FKS= Flooded Kentucky Sector

NYS= New York Sector

NYS and FKS are the two that i'm actually going to be focusing on. yes, both of them. although im only just now getting to FKS, so you won't see any stuff from it when i start posting the actual story(which might be a while since im the president of procrastination).

honestly, the only reason i'm doing this is because i have something im working on for a certain calico shark * Cough cough * @sharkfinn

Anyways, hope this made even a little bit of sense. btw FKS is super flooded. they put up a wall to be a border for the other sectors, but then it flooded due to excessive rain for a very long time and lots of water towers and other stuff breaking. if you've ever watched water world, the it's kinda like that there. after it started to overflow from so much water a bunch of magicky people and sciency people came together and set up pillars around the wall. these pillars, when turned on, create a dome forcefield thing that keeps all the water in while also allowing people and stuff t get in. although id recommend not entering without diving gear and plenty of oxygen stored up because the water level goes quite far above the wall. the buildings inside are all submerged and people try to go down as far as possible to gather stuff. although very few have actually been able to make it to the bottom without gills or extra help. unfortunately, the corrupted there have adapted and all live underwater in the deepest parts. also, spore-producing plants have adapted as well, and they are now Underwater-spore-producing plants. so if you are diving and see a cloud of glowing yellow sparks, steer clear cuz they are spores and it is likely there is going to be corrupted there. the most dangerous corrupted to run into there is the Leviathan(yes i know im so original). he is basically a giant monster that im definitely going to draw soon that lives in the deepest pits of the Atlantis(which is what the people of the sector call the underwater city). everyone knows it means death to go near it's home. it'll even eat fellow corrupteds. on occasions, it'll come up to the surface to get more food and everyone is constantly looking for signs that he is surfacing. the main "island"(aka a bunch of rafts tied together on top of a few extra tall buildings that are somehow a good three stories above the water. dont ask me what buildings they are, because they probably dont exist in real life. they were built outside of the real world, purely existing in dimension 29) has a large cage next to it where they store dead bodies and corrupted to feed to leviathan in order to avoid him eating any of the rafts and people instead. dont worry though, he is only big enough to eat half the main island with one bite! as for the normal corrupted, think of the minecraft drowneds but make them 30 times more horrifying and tall enough to to touch the ceiling of a ten foot tall room. also give them 4 rows of extra sharp tiny little teeth. as well as fins and extra agility when they are underwater. there you go! Sea Corrupteds, aka "trenchers". yes, the people of FKS have all seen aquaman and all refer to sea corrupted as that to make a reference to the movie lol. there are normal fish too btw. most of them hang around in schools inside reef-turned buildings.

okay, so that's the gist of FKS! Casey, Jupiter, and Keigo have been to this sector once because they were trying to find materials and they found the border on accident. Casey almost drowned and they decided that once was enough.

hope you guys liked this! definitely didnt take a few hours to come up with all this haha why would you think that?

and nooo dont ask me what the leviathan looks like nooo then ill have an excuse to draw it and we dont want that haha noooo!

[arabian-batboy]

Okay genuine question then. Should i not vote.

Do i sit back and let the genocidal maniac who is set on ruining everything EVERYWHERE win. Or do i try and sway it to the genocidal maniac who is at least advocating for my ability to afford food.

Thats the decision im faced with here. If you have any suggestions i am more than open to them! we just. dont have many options.

I dont disagree with you, theyre both horrible. But one of them will win either way. This is a "lesser of two evils" situation, and you either watch everything burn or try to sway it to the person who has at least ONE thing you support. there's unfortunately no magical third option that fixes everything. I'm open to suggestions, believe me, we are genuinely looking for them.

How many times do we need to have this conversation before you people realize that the "lesser of two evils" is just a sham, both parties are equally evil and have equal amount of blood on their hands? They just brainwashed you idiots into believing you will actually be able to "afford food" under one of them when both of them will gladly have you starve to death as long as they can keep dropping bombs over innocent civilians half-way across the world because they know most of you will continue being divided into voting one of them without ever considering the possibility of voting for a 3rd party that will not prioritize imperialism in the global south over their hungry citizens.

Which is why you're asking if not wanting to vote for democrats means you shouldn't bother going to the voting booth at all, its 2024 and your brain still can't comprehends that you have the right to vote for a 3rd party and that's exactly why your 2 parties system (which in reality is actually just a one party system) managed to last so long.

And I'm not an idiot, I know how hard it is for a 3rd party to win elections and that it's not something that can happen over-night, but there's a start for everything and unless you're willing to continuously invest in a 3rd party for a long period of time so that they can gradually grow in numbers then nothing will change.

Do I believe a 3rd party might win this elections or even the next elections? Probably not, but it doesn't change the fact that the green party (as well as the Libertarian party) is more popular than ever now and that US's unconditional support for history most-documented genocide in Gaza as well as how AIPAC gleefully publicly announce how literally all the candidates they finance have won their elections has made more people wake the fuck up and realize realize how broken and corrupted their system is and how voting 3rd party is the only way to fix it and who knows? Maybe voting 3rd party, even if it will not results in them winning, might influence the other 2 parties to start adopting similar policies to the green party, not because they actually care about innocent people dying, but in hopes they can lure 3rd party voters into coming back to vote for them.

So until that day comes, I will continue clowning people who support either republicans or democrats because that's the only way to grow numbers for a 3rd party and if you still don't believe me and genuinely still believe that the US's government literally can NOT be run by non-war criminals? Then the US simply shouldn't exist and I pray another superpower will come and destroy it in the future, after all why should the lives of American citizens (who don't want to put any efforts into stopping their government from using their tax money to commit more war-crimes and state-sponsored terrorism) be worth more than non-Americans?

Again, assuming what you think about the 2 parties system being unchangeable is true, which I personally don't believe.

[driftwooddestiel]

below the cut is my “sonfs i NEED to amv” list, directly copy pasted from my notes app . this is a culmination of all my ideas its my magnum opus

even when the wayers cold (lisa maybe??)

golden skans (sam faith amv maybe???)

saving grace (the cranberriesnatural real)

spsceman (castiel, anna, amara and other characters ‘falling to earth’ growing to love humanity hear me out)

(coffees for closers) [fallout boy] (faith throughout supernatural)

w.a.m.s (destiel & purgatory and stuff arc alsoo apocapy’…

float on (everyone :) ) happy birthday dean ? what if they were happy…

am i ever gonna see your face again (destiel and their many widowed arcs)

when will you die (fbi/police & their run ins with dean and sam) OR (chuck and his constant attempts to change and regulate the charcaters) maybe both…

the girl of my dreams is giving me nightmares (samruby demon blood arc) this one is TOP PRIORITY!!!!!!!! because its so special to me forever (first ever amv idea ever :O)

things go bump in the night from the scooby doo movie! silly

monkey gone to heaven (pixies) with dean or sam and deaths idk what else to say okay

tame (pixies) with kripke era dean

no 13 baby - s4/s5 destiel… handprint……… hear me out…. EDIT: i dont remember writing this??? i dont really know how this even makes sense but i trust u past me kind of

Mr Hyde (bb brunes) - demon dean and/or mark of cain dean … maybe drowley??

turn the lights off (tally hall) - something about monsters demons etc as a queer allegory okay just . hear me out

call me maybe (carly rae jepsen) destiel early seasons please just hear me out on this one

excuses ou mensonges (orelsan) - nick and lucifer idk i just think maybe..

your body my temple sam and lucifer hear me out ACTUALLY JUSTG SMA AND AUTONOMY 

killing time 2.0 (american psycho tha musical) chuck and wnding the world ^_^

needle in the hay (elliot smith) - dean. throws up and dies

mask of my own face (lemon demon) - gabriel :)

what sarah said (death cab for cutie) - destiel and all cas’ deaths. throws up

(ANIAMTION) oatmeal (jack stauber) - the archangels 

i cant be with you (the cranberries) - destiel

private life (oingo boingo) - the bunker (probably dean focused… maybe even destiel you know how it is)

hymn for a scarecrow (tally hall) - the angels

VIDEO GAMES (LANA DEL RAY) DESTIEL IM GOING TO DIEA

ELECTROMAGNETIC SPECTRUM SONG!!!

curious (franz ferdinand) - destiel cas pov EDIT: okay another one i have no memory of writing

ode to my family (the cranberries) - jo harvelle

right action (franz ferdinand) - tfw and their many mistakes etc

johnny delusional (ffs) - chouse…………………………………..

hot to go (chappell roan) - dean being a hot girl summer tm

the bad touch (bloodhound gang) - hannigram… the sillies… do u feel me

judas (lady gaga) - hannigram my goofy guys. hannibal pov

sweet tangerine (the hush sound) - hannigram . more serious. hannibal pov again

nobody likes me everybody hates me guess ill go eat worms (idk artist) - hannibal :3

complicated (avril lavigne) - skyler white, about walter

boom clap (charli xcx) - hilson. no im not insane.

need you tonight (inxs) - hannigram. cmon. you see it

pop culture (youtube, forgot artist) - homestuck ‼️ 

everytime (butterfingers) - dean!!! hear me out okay. it also works so well for adam saw but unfortunately he has so little footage :(

i just had sex (the lonely island feat. akon) - saw characters getting out of traps and stuff this is such a silly idea but i laugh every time i think of it

[etherealspacejelly]

Do you have a favourite thing you’ve ever drawn?

Do you have a favourite quote?

What’s one sport that makes you roll your eyes?

Favourite fic trope to write?

Do you wear nail polish?

What’s a quote or poem that is constantly stuck in your head?

Do you have a pair of comfort shoes?

Plain mugs or mugs with pictures/words on them?

<333

ooo yay!

i think my favourite thing ive ever drawn was this animal skull i drew in art class back in high school. i kept it in the front pocket of my art folder so i could see it all the time because i was super proud of it. i dont have a picture of it unfortunately otherwise i would show you

oh god how to pick just one. i think everything freddie mercury ever said is my favourite quote. the man had so many bangers. if i had to pick just one it would be "ill fucking do it darling". because he did do it. it was difficult and it was painful but he fucking did it, and he created my favourite song of all time in doing so. what a legend

this one is easy. american football. first of all, how are you going to have the Audacity to steal the name of the most popular sport of all time, and apply it to something that hardly even uses the feet??? everyone else in the world calls the same game football but you just had to be special didnt you. the rules dont make any sense, its way too complicated, and no one outside of america even gives a shit about it. sorry guys but you're gonna have to take the L on this one

hmm. i havent written that many fics yet. idk if it counts as a trope but i just love writing cuddle fics. probably because so many of my favourite characters are fucking touch starved as shit lmao. i want to give them the attention they deserve.

i have worn nail polish on occasion! i think its fun and it looks cool. however, i dont pass as it is, and nail polish really doesnt help matters. perhaps when im further along in my transition ill bring it back

idk if i have a poem thats always stuck in my head necessarily. i dont read poetry very much. but i can still recite the vast majority of london by william blake from when i studied it in english gcse lol. sometimes i do just for funsies

my brown trainers! they're basically the only shoes i wear these days. they're comfortable and cute and they go with most of my outfits.

i have many mugs, all of which have pictures or words on them. my favourite mug at the moment is my undertale mug, it has all the characters on it and the fight, act, item, and mercy boxes. my little sister got it for me :)

[cpunkwitch]

answering my questions p3

[pt: answering my questions p3]

part 1 (link), part 2 (link)

ask game 3 (link)

biggest inaccessible thing that angers you right now?

doors with round handles. fuck those door knobs im glad my bedroom door doesnt actually close so i dont have to use it.

2. something no one talks about that you wish had more discussion about how it could be more accessible?

windows. i dont ever see anyone talk about how windows (that are meant to be opened for air circulation etc) could be more accessible. the window i have i have to wrestle with in order to get it open in the summer, because of that i avoided it this summer and ended up not having ac

i get there are some windows that have the screen on the other side and the inside slides up, i prefer those, my sister has that in her room, but the locks and the act of opening the window itself is not easy or something everyone can do.

3. what are some good resources that help you out? any blogs or sites that really helped you out with a disability or gave you support?

a user on here actually suggested speech assistant to me, i dont remember who but i was able to find an aac for my phone thanks to a tumblr user. i dont really have anything else to respond with, my resources are actually kinda limited ^^;

i got my cane off amazon, thats really the only other thing i have.

4. if you have an aid, mobility or not, how did you get it and do you know any good places to get them at good prices?

unfortunately all i know is amazon because i dont have a way of using other sites. most other sites dont use stripe and paypal is a bitch to me. i know there was a post going around earlier to be put on a wait list for a free wheelchair i think? if anyone knows where that post is id like to reblog it again

best way to get things at a lower price though is if theyre used/2nd hand. theyre considered worth less than new ones as they've been used and probably worn in already, therein they arent in mint condition like newer ones, but theyre still good. i actually got my first two binders that way. (tbh i get most things that way)

i know you can find 2nd hand stuff on facebook groups/marketplace, Kijiji, ebay and similar sites but i dont fully trust most of them myself.

when it comes to aid's that are programs though, such as aac or screen readers, there are tonnes that are completely free or come with small monthly subs or in-app purchases that arent too pricey and a lot of sites and social apps have those built in now a days with stickers, emojis, gifs, text-to-speech options on devices and so on.

5. any programs you know of that are either easily accessible or make things more accessible?

aside from my answer in 4, i have asl bloom which is like duolingo for american sign language. if you wanna quickly learn some asl for free, asl bloom is great!

i mentioned i have speech assistant for an aac, i've excitedly posted a bit yesterday about using it for the first time in a classroom setting.

6. whats an aid that no one mentions being an aid? could be big or small

anything is an aid if it assists you. glasses, braces, screen readers, etc

i see plenty of people acknowledging that pictures, emojis etc are aids as well esp for the nonverbal, more so than i would see sometime in the past.

a lot of things that might not be considered socially acceptable can be aids too, plastic straws for example, esp bendy ones, but thats been talked about quite a lot since the pandemic and i hope to see that discussion continue until theyre finally brought back as the default.

things that i never-to-rarely see anyone mention as an aid of some sort though? aside from medication, creams and things for pain management, theres not much to come to mind.

7. any recent news that really pissed you off, like an accessibility being taken away?

there was something at the time of making that ask game but i no longer remember what. nothing recent that have to bring up, at least not right now.

8. any good news to share with the disabled community?

i am sorry to say i bring no news at all, good or bad, but i may have some at a later date. perhaps whenever i get that french aac update we can consider that good news

9. what are some helpful things in your town/city for cripples?

nothing special i can think of

10. what can your town/city improve on to help?

the fucking side walks

11. is there an accommodation you wish you had/could get/want more of?

if i had the money and was in a different situation, id get a shower chair, braces or compression gloves, a wheelchair etc.

typing programs like typist arent made with disabled people in mind and i wish they were, i make mistakes because im dyslexic and cant always control my stims and they score you on how many mistakes you make with no backspace option and you cant continue until you improve with the least amount to no mistakes. they should at least let you use the backspace.

i use typist for class and it pisses me off that i cant go back and fix my mistakes. not just typing either but writing classes in general that grade you on how many mistakes you make should consider and accommodate people with issues writing/typing. just giving them more time to work on an assignment is not much of an accomodation. tics, stims etc are all things that can effect a persons writing and its pretty unfair and ablest to think that everyone can just stop making mistakes with writing if they practice enough.

12. whats some discourse going around right now that you wish would stop?

non physically disabled / able bodied people claiming cripplepunk includes them. should never have been discourse to begin with the name itself should be fucking self explanatory and if you know anything about cripplepunk its that its FOR THE PHYSICALLY DISABLED

also transid/transx bullshit...

13. advice for people who are only just discovering theyre crippled?

its okay to be disabled, learning your physical limitations and general limitations with your body is actually a good thing.

youre not lazy, youre not unsightly, youre not gross, youre not creepy, youre a living being and you deserve the accessibility, accomodations and help you need or want. if youre thinking of getting assistance get it.

youre not taking anything away or hurting anything by calling yourself disabled and using aids if you think it helps you.

whatever you have hindering your physical functions does not define you nore is it the only trait about you but it is a part of you that comes with you. dont let anyone disrespect you over it, get/use what you need, its your body.

14. any questions for people who've been in the community a while?

what were things like when cripplepunk first started? how did it gain traction and popularity? how did you come across it and what was it like when you were new?

do you have any advice for people just joining cripplepunk and things to say about content creation for cpunk? is there content you wish to see more of or reoccur? what was content online like when you first joined disabled/crippled spaces?

15. ramble about your condition?

man i really need to book time with the chiropractor. my arthritis aches are in more than just my hands and wrists, i get really bad foot cramps, leg and ankle pain and i have seriously bad tension and stiffness in my neck, shoulders and back.

if i remember tomorrow i'll call them when i get home for lunch between classes. and see if i can book thursday afternoons

a lot of my condition comes from my moms side of the family, which is cool in theory, i like talking about that kinda thing, hereditary and genes n stuff interests me but because its my mom and i grew up in her shadow being referred to as her "mini me" and shit, it makes me pretty uncomfortable to know just how much like her i am and i cant get away from it. (and thats not even mentioning how uncomfortable i am being associated with one of my ab/sers(u) to such a degree)

16. rant about your environment?

i feel like thats a thing for an entire post on its own. i could rant about my home environment or my city.

17. if you have any aids, have you decorated and/or named them?

ive painted my cane and and trying to paint it again when i remember, have the time and spoons, but i havnt named it or added any attachments and i want to. suggestions are welcome!

18. tips for maintaining mobility aids of any?

as a cane user:

wash and sanitize the handle/grip and foot of your cane as frequently as you use it. especially if someone else has touched it and you've been outside with it and have allergies!

use paint sealer if you customize your cane and use masking tape on the parts of it that you arent customizing (handle, foot, joints if its foldable)

place it by the door but not next to the entrance or shoes so it doesnt get knocked over/kicked etc and so you remember to take it with you if youre an "out of sight out of mind" type of forgetful person like me.

crippled-pvp mentioned this before; place your cane under the seats/on the floor if youre in a car. its deadly otherwise.

19. anything that motivates you to leave your house even just for fresh air and a stretch?

coffee/snack runs. the garden on campus nearby. if it werent for close by things like that i'd see no point in leaving the house outside work/school. and maybe a few other things like painting in the back yard ig?

20. free space!

feel free to ask me questions, to clarify or elaborate/expand on something, my inbox is always open for a chat and anon is on for privacy of those who use side blogs or are too anxious to be off anon. anon is not on for hate/discourse.

[ID: banner reading "dni if... proship, transx/id, syscourse/discourse blog, anti-mspec lesbians/gays, anti-lesboy/turigirl more in pinned rentry. this blog is protected by the addams family, the de rolo family and co." in all black lowercase text. It has a grey cloud background. On the left is the De Rolo coat of arms with a cobweb in the top corner and symmetrically flipped on the right is the symbol of Vox Machina with the same cobweb in the bottom corner :End ID]

[paganposting]

Hey! Sorry for the question, but I was wondering where to find resources on getting into druidry/how to find a grove? I noticed you suggested not doing looking online—another thing I wondered was if it was a closed practice?

alright so this might be a long answer

i'll answer the second question first- is druidry a closed practice?

theres debate but the consensus is largely that no, it is not closed. some argue that it is semi-closed in the sense that it must be practiced only by people who have done tons of research and study on celtic history if they aren't celtic. i personally dont love this idea much, several members of my grove practice multiple religions alongside druidry like judaism or indigenous american religions. i dont feel like they should have this extra burden of proving their dedication essentially for not being white 🤷‍♂️

now- how to find a grove

first you need to know what type of druidry you are interested in. there are two main large druid organizations that i'm aware of

1) OBOD (Order of Bards Ovates and Druids)

this group is largely neopagan, focuses on welsh and british traditions, and draws heavily from arthurian mythology- although i believe their new president is an Irish woman so we'll see how that influences the order. they have a website where you can find a chapter near you.

2) ADF (Ár nDraíocht Féin or A Druid Fellowship)

this group is largely revivalist/ reconstructionist, focuses on irish traditions, and draws heavily from irish mythology. they also have a website where you can find a chapter near you.

outside of those there are of course independent groves. thats what im part of! these are more difficult to find, i would probably begin my search for one on facebook and asking around local witchy shops. lots of these groups are more informal and dont have a specific website. the advice to steer away from the internet is because you will find a lot of snake oil salesmen unfortunately.

one online source i do really highly recommend is the irish pagan school. they offer courses and online classes and guided meditations that are all extremely thorough and led by indigenous irish people. they're also launching the ogham academy which is super cool if that's something you're interested in!

for the most part youre just going to have to show up in person to a lot of places until you find somewhere that fits. also, dont be afraid of being the only druid in a different pagan group if you like that community and theyre willing to have you! i personally think that having a strong community is more important than being in a druids only club lmao

hope that helps!!!

[notahorseindisguise]

laughing crying throwing up over your live blogging of American psycho holy shit 😭 I have to call Patrick Patty from now on that's. Classic. Also yeah that movie is truly unhinged. The prevailing theory is that it's about how rich white men are often isolated but have the privilege of low acting so they can (and do) get away with murder but also the flipside of that is that these men do not get the help they may need if they're suffering from mental or physical illness like Patrick (because he is clearly severely mentally ill and a repressed fag lol). He isn't a good person, that's not the point of the movie but he does need help and he's unable to get it both because he doesn't know how to ask for help and is repressing his feelings, and because of the cultural taboo around him asking for help. He's doing what is expected of him: dating/fucking women, going to nice restaurants with his buddies, showing a surface level understanding of politics. But under that is a deeply fucked up guy who is probably into men but is unable to explore those feelings. Idk. There are better worded analyses out there but I'm just glad you enjoyed it!

this is a good analysis!! yeah i can definitely see a queer reading honestly. i think you could definitely say that the hypersexuality of him constantly having sex with woman and seemingly getting nothing out of it is a form of overcompensation, or like, trying to prove to himself that he is straight.

all his political views that he mentioned, seemed to just be buzz words. like i hate the idea of "virtue signalling" but, my understanding of the phrase makes it seem that thats what he was doing, just trying to make it seem like he had all the right political beliefs, when really it was shallow. that was interesting.

also, due to the nature of it being . id say first person. obviously we dont see directly through pats eyes but we do hear all of his thoughts and only see his actions (which i think is what makes something first person in a film perspective? unless thats just third person with a limited narrator? idk all the film terminology). anyway due to us only seeing pattys side of everything. we get this idea that all the men around him are fulfilled. they appear to be doing all the same daily work activities as him, but unlike him, they seem to be enjoying it, further isolating bateman. you could probably take a marxist reading of this, study batemans actions through like, the theory of alienation maybe?

i unfortunately dont know too much about the marx's theory of alienation, but it did seem as if patrick was very isolated and had no real substance in his life, leading to a degradation of the self and then a loss of empathy? leading him to kill to just, find some semblance of humanity? unless it states earlier in the movie that he's lacked emotions since he was a child. anyway maybe a marxist reading but definitely an anti-capitalist reading this movie is chockers full of anti-capitalist messages. dorsia as an unachievable goal, the godot theyre waiting for or the green light theyre chasing could be like, personal fulfillment in a capitalistic society, like how theyre always pressing for the next level, trying to gain more money for really no reason? idk . idk why i mentioned godot that probably doesnt have many textual links other than the one i mentioned and even that is weak, but theres probably some good links to be made between this and gatsby? not sure, i didnt pay too much attention to it .

anyway. this analysis is like. really weak. its late and my brain is off LOL im sorry its so messy. this is a great exam piece though

[bombshelllblonde]

heyyyyyy im backkk!!!!!!!

invading ur ask box again lol, sorry!!!!!!

this might start being a thing

ANYWYAS

i totally forgot to mention last time hiw muvh i love lenny, mary-beth and hosea and tilly and MOLLY O SHEA omg

the drinking mission w lenny is one of my favorites, and I LOVE PLAYING DOMINOES W TILLY MY GIRL SHE IS THE BEST

AND SADIE I LOVE HER SM

Like yea gurl!!!!! kill the o driscolls!! kill them all!! avenge ur pookie!!! rahhh!!!

Mary-beth and kieran are my blorbs. my pookies. my babbygirls. my schmookums

molly o'shea that woman that she is i love her so so so much

i feel so bad for her tho w her fights w dutch :(

speaking of dutch, idk i have like a neutral (slightly negative) view of him???

i dislike how he treats molly, and w how he treats mary-beth?? (inst dutch also like 40-50 and mary-beth like 20-smth? idk im probably rlly biased in this lol)

ALSO another reason dutch be chosing Micah the rat over what is his basically adopted son??

im definitely biased in this but wtv lmao

but he hasnt really done much so i dont hate him, but i dont like him either

moving on, do yk if theres any way to explore blackwater + south of it while playing as arthur? i wanna get all the dinosaur bones and legendary animals !!

i replayed the 'americans at rest' mission, yk w bill (i think) javier and charles at the bar (towards the beginning of the game)

its so fucking funny i cannot

arthur walks in, uses his amazing charmer skills (LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER) and then bill runs in, punches a guy therefore starting a bar fight, HERE COME CHARLES WITH THE STEEL CHAIR, arthur gets his ass kicked and then kicks ass and nearly beats the guy half to death

yk when jack grows up and tells epople abt his dear ol uncle arthur that uncle lore drop boutta be CRAZYYYY

did i mention charles throwing a chair? its my favorite part could you tell

i have a pretty neutral view of john marston ig, i kinda hope he steps up and gets the stick outta his ass, starts being a father to jack or smth but im trying not to get my hopes up lmao

thats it for now!!!! hope u have a nice day!!!!

(thanks for responding to these btw! lmk if im bothering u tho, ty for letting me ramble abt my hyperfixation lmao)

okay lsitennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn rdr2 has been mt hyper fixation since July of 2022 when my brother in law gave me his old ps4 and the game and i don’t think ive shut up about it since i started playing. My entire personality is rdr2. And my current outlet/therapy is writing my rdr2 fanfiction

it’s gotten to the point where my family has literally started buying me cowboy/outlaw stuff. when I was a teenager i loved owls so everyone got me owl things. now im obsessed with cowboys at 26 years old and every gift I receive has something to do with outlaws

My sister got me a cameo of Roger Clark talking to me as Arthur for my 25th bday and literally nothing has ever topped that. It was the most amazing gift ever and now I have a video of Arthur Morgan saying my name and talking to me about my horses!!!! It’s so amazing I watch it all the time

unfortunately there isn’t any way to explore blackwater as Arthur unless you get like mods or something. the AI immediately roll up and the bounty hunters shoot him dead if you try to get into west Elizabeth

do you know how to play dominoes??? Literally ive only ever played 5 finger fillet in that game because i cant fucking play dominoes or poker bc i don’t know how

also Tilly is amazing just wait until later in the game. there’s a mission that really solidified the love i have for Arthur being the protective older brother

Dutch is sooooo complex and i think that’s why i love him so much. i won’t get too deep into my feels for him just yet bc i want you to keep going without me saying anything but once you get farther into the game we can talk about him!!!

Hosea and Dutch are literally my gay fathers. I love them so much. Their love for each other literally makes my tummy flip I love it so so so much

Also I’d let Charles hit me with a chair too, tbh. Love of my life

I never disliked Molly but I didn’t like her either, I think she’s just too much of a loud mouth. Felt like to me she could have not been in the game and it wouldn’t have changed much. Idk

And John’s complexity we can talk about after you progress a lil further. I honestly don’t want to spoil anything or give it away unless you don’t care about spoilers. But I’m just gonna stay quiet until you let me know 😂😂😂😂

[mikarchive2]

what i read in february 2023 📚

1. teatro grottesco by thomas ligotti - ★★★★ - picked this up because i randomly read one of his short stories on a train once and was so enamoured ... a short story collection centered around a subtle existential sort of horror that is less about gore and violence and more about something unknown but dreadful lurking in your peripheral vision . some of these, especially the ones from the deformations section, felt very welcome to night vale . delicious . makes you feel like a kid listening to scary campfire stories . i enjoy hanging out in the world created by this narrative voice so much

favourites: purity, the town manager, the clown puppet, my case for retributive action + in a foreign town, in a foreign land

2. the raven and the reindeer by t. kingfisher - ★★ - i think what im doing here is trying to read a fairytale retelling every month 👍 ... this really did not work for me though . the writing style felt so childish ( this could have been a book for twelve year olds ) + the story did not go anywhere and stayed extremely surface-level throughout the whole book . yeah sure there were lesbians but no actual substance whatsoever . the reading process was somewhat enjoyable because the humor was alright, but thats pretty much the only redeeming quality

3. the world keeps ending, and the world goes on by franny choi - ★★★ - i believe this is a case of ‘its not you its me’ because even though the way the author plays with language is straight up fascinating something about her poetry never clicks with me . i had the exact same issue with soft science as well - there is a certain detachment and coldness to her style that doesnt allow me to properly process the poems on an emotional level . still, i really liked the fourth section, it was so imaginative and full of the kind of resilience that is only born out of utter hopelessness

4. the passion by jeanette winterson - ★★★ - unfortunately i have the same issue here as with franny choi - something in me just always refuses to click with jeanette winterson . the author is trying to lead me somewhere by the hand but she is always slightly out of reach . this is my third book by her and while i can see and appreciate her craft it just never leaves a lasting impression on me its so strange ... i enjoyed the imagery + the philosophical ideas about love and passion but the story itself ... i dont know

5. the sandman: world’s end ( vol. 8 ) by neil gaiman - reread - i am not rating these god bless and putting them in the review post is probably not a good idea either since i ramble about them enough as is . what can i even say about a series that pretty much formed the way i understand the world and the human condition . stories within stories within stories . the foreshadowing here is insane and probably unnoticeable unless you are rereading . its hard to say what the writing process here was actually like perhaps it was way more spontaneous than i imagine but it all seems so meticulously and purposefully planned its just stunning

( + two books i left unfinished last year because of my broken ebook reader and decided to finish this month: )

6. wyrd sisters by terry pratchett - ★★★ - ( looks above ) my reading order here is very ‘frequently bought together’ ‘do not separate them’ huh ... this was very shakespearean which was fun but not ideal for me personally because it means some things definitely flew right over my head . i think i enjoyed equal rites a little more ? however at the end of the day its just your typical discworld novel i laughed i witnessed some well-written women and losermen i laughed some more . what else could i ask for

7. when i grow up i want to be a list of further possibilities by chen chen - ★★★★ - wonderfully heart-warming and radiant and witty and has the power to restore your belief in love and tenderness at least for a moment . this kind of literal and confessional american poetry usually isnt for me but miraculously chen chen made it work ! basically the hype is well deserved

up next: im actually not sure im trying to slow down since i need to get through some college textbooks 💔 ... + im sure want to finish the sandman which is really enough for the next one thousand years . considering mrs. dalloway by virginia woolf too someone called it a spring read once and ive wanted to read it during this season ever since