#using my own experiences as an example
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I've been mulling on a thought, so I'm curious
Guidance:
I am using a broad definition of disaster here. You do not need to go look up whether an event was officially declared a disaster or not. Does it seem like it should be a disaster? Then go for it.
For the purpose of this poll "been through a disaster" means 'been in the area in which a disaster is occurring.' If a tornado touches down in your town, but does not hit your house (which you were in at the time) then you have been through a disaster but you did not necessarily sustain damage
This poll is asking about your home and/or the building you were in at the time. If you were not home during the disaster, you still get to count the damage done to it.
Home/Building... eh, define it how you will
Pick the closest answer, disasters are a big category and I'm not going to be able to fit in good answers for every variation of them
#I've been through several#ranging all the way up to 'not salvageable'#so I'm trying to get a bit of an idea how universal my experiences are before potentially using it as an example#adding a general#TW#because IDK what will turn up in the notes#CW disasters#CW tornadoes#since I mentioned them#also yes pandemics are included if that is how you want to label your experience#there were a broad range of experiences so I'll let you interpret your own
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~ Batman and Robin: Year One
At first, I was a bit scared with where this was going, because the whole "Bruce ignored Dick when he first got him" is not my jam, but I was pleasantly surprised here. Also, I refuse to believe Alfred has never raised his voice at Bruce. We are talking about a man that used to beat up bullies at school and was expelled after trying to kill one because Alfred had enough and told him to find a more efficient way to deal with it. No way Alfred never had to raise his voice at him.
Anyway, Bruce getting so much into his work that he gets in a bubble, he forgets to eat and to sleep, time doesn't exist, he cannot hear you. Really, a neurodivergent icon. BUT, the moment he is out of it and simply hears it's about Dick, he gets so worried, it's adorable.
This is already the second time in this comics that the writer reminds us that it's Bruce that raised Dick, not Alfred. First, with the cps worker, when Bruce reassured her he wasn't going to make Alfred raises the boy instead of him. And here, with Alfred telling Bruce to "fix it", that it is Bruce's responsibility to parent Dick and Alfred will not do it, which Bruce agrees to, he just doesn't know how to do it yet.
This story is going to be about Bruce learning to be a dad, and I'm here for it.
Also, I wanna point out how this is a different take about Dick Grayson's early weeks at the manor from what we get normally. We are used to "I feel lonely and sad" Dick, and here they gave us "no more parental surpervision/you can't dictate me" Dick. I don't know how I feel about it yet.
Very funny how I rant about how Bruce is independent, and then DC published this where Bruce is described as an independent child that didn't need Alfred to tell him what needed to be done.
#batman#bruce wayne#dick grayson#robin#batfam#alfred pennyworth#dc comics#my ramblings#batman and robin year one#another one for the “Alfred didn’t step up as a father when Bruce was a kid” because Bruce is literally using his own experience with Alfre#as an example and is realizing that's actually not what children need#also Alfred refering to Bruce when he was a child as an adult which already happened TWICE in this comic like no he was a kid still#him being introverted and cleaned after himself doesn’t mean he wasn’t a kid anymore
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I'd find it interesting to see how Jack's dads would react to him having a love interest. Someone flirting with him. Someone asking him on a date.
How would Sam react?
How would Cas react?
How would Dean react?
#please if you have some headcanons I'd be happy to read them#sam would be all focused on education about consent and sex and feelings#dean would give him poor dating advice using his own experience as an example#cas would roll his eyes and calm dean down#saying they waited 12 years and cas had to do all the work and die for them to be together#they'd bicker while sam would tell him he has to use protection and precise he's not talking about an angel blade#sam would also do some research about that someone#and they'd all gather around his laptop to watch what he found with him#jack would smile#because he knows his dads care about him and that's why they're acting like this#is it a fic idea?#probably not I can't work on that right now anyway but maybe later#team free will 2.0#my destiel fanfic
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so listen, i’m 24 and been having sex since 19 and i never came. is that normal???? are the 2 men i fucked just incompetent or is there something wrong with me?
easy. the two men are incompetent. its never ur fault queen always blame the man
#no but to answer ur question fr. i’d just try to experiment on your own a bit more! try new sex toys for example and find what works for you#for example i always use my vibe during sex#before that i’d also have trouble finishing sometimes#— 𝒂𝒓𝒊'𝒔 𝒈𝒐𝒕 𝒎𝒂𝒊𝒍 ₊˚⊹ ᰔ#anon
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Every day I wake up, I'm full of inspiration and ambition, I lollygag a bit, I kinda skirt around it, I actively avoid The Thing I WANT to do. Then I just kinda give up and do something else.
#idk what's up w this but like. the more intensely i WANT the more i can't bring myself to do it.#like feh example like you'd think bc it's ALL i'm on about. i'd be deeply IN the source material#and i have felt i've been away doing my own thing for too long i need to revisit it. i Need to#but for some reason it's unbearable. not bad. i just can't bear it. i do NOT know what's up w that#i wanna keep listening to a playlist too (hoping it's still up) but like. i broke away. and i am struggling to return.#AND LIKE. BEYOND FEH. i feel this about video games in general like i have to do something that requires no commitment.#labyrinth of galleria was great for this. for some INEXPLICABLE reason. it is just a COMPLETELY different experience#like. the feelings i feel when playing galleria vs like etrian odyssey where i'm VERY attached to my guys#the most upsetting side effect is i feel like i'm losing alfonse's voice like i feel like i used to be able#to mimic his speech patterns PERFECTLY. but everything just feels off or not cleaned up enough#and again i can't fucking bear it. like i am almost going to fucking cry about it. like what is wrong here.#like WHY can't i get myself to DO. THE THINGS. I LIKE. THAT BRING ME JOY. THE COMMITMENT.#i think i'm also worried like i don't wanna get to the point where like. my blorbos are unrecognizable.#spent too much time in my head and now they're all warped and weird. but like. like. for some reason.#esp if i feel this INTENSE fucking affinity it's like. i get in this weird headspace where can't look directly at it.#i should do ANYTHING else. what is my fucking PROBLEM.#does anybody have a cure. or do i just give up forever.
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youre learning Russian, right? I've also started learning with borrowed textbooks, and the consensus I've seen online is that its not enough, and that a course is necessary. if you don't mind I'd be really appreciative to know how you got where you are and if you think that's true.
Спасибо за помощь (ღゝ◡╹)ノ♡
Unfortunately, I don't really know what I'm doing either. Just kinda stumbling through, and "where I am" isn't all that far. I can only ever be an authority on what helps me learn Russian; in my experience, there's never been a one-to-one, "follow these steps I took to become fluent" method. Everyone has to figure out their own quirks. (And if this isn't true for someone then I'm very jealous of that person.)
I've seen about as many different opinions as there are ways to learn. Some think you need courses. Some think courses are useless. Some like textbooks; others hate them. The one consistent thing seems to be input--everyone agrees you need a lot of comprehensible input (meaning, you understand some of what you're consuming). But is a course necessary? I don't think so. Whether it could be vastly beneficial or a waste of time and money is something that depends entirely on the person's learning style. A resource I've linked further down may help you determine whether it'd help you. I've never taken a course, so I don't have any experience there.
Also: I have ADHD, so everything here is working around that. Motivation is a massive issue for me, and I've generally found that forcing my way through something droll for long periods of time just... isn't something I can make myself do. It burns me out. I try to make everything something I want to do, or at least not very painful. But my methods are also slower and less effective than something more structured.
Comprehensible Input
How I got to it being helpful:
People go on about comprehensible input all the time, and I can see why; it's extremely important. It's what finally moved me from mid-A1 to late-A2. But actually getting to a place where input even can be comprehensible was so horrifically painful for me that for a long while I felt completely inept. So, here's the things I did, in order, that I think helped:
A0-A1 (not helpful yet)
Duolingo + Twitter: Don't get me wrong--I hate Duolingo. And non-fanart Twitter. But it was a great combination for learning Cyrillic. I used Duolingo's earliest levels to get familiar with Cyrillic and some very basic words. Concurrently, I followed some Russian fanartists on Twitter who also posted text posts frequently, and turned notifs on for them. That made it so that 3-5 times a day, I would get a notification for a post in Russian, and I would practise reading/sounding out Cyrillic. I wasn't too focused on understanding what the post was saying, just getting a familiarity with the alphabet.
Memrise + Anki: Pain. God, so much pain. This was the worst. Necessary and effective, but the absolute, God-forsaken worst. Once I felt comfortable enough with Cyrillic, I started working through two decks: a. Memrise: vlarya's 10k most common Russian words deck. It goes in order of most to least common, has audio, and has typing practise. This replaces Duolingo. (When Memrise inevitably removes community courses altogether, feel free to ask for a backup of this deck. If I'm still on here by then, I should be able to give my backup that works with Anki.) I don't recommend Memrise's official courses. b. Anki: Neri's Russian Sentences (blog link) deck is great for practising the simple words you're learning with Memrise, getting common phrases down, and starting to see how Russian as a language comes together. It'll take a bit to click. c. keybr: I also started practising a little with keybr, mainly because having to type in Russian on Memrise sucks with the on-screen keyboard. keybr is the best site I've found to learn to touch type different keyboards. It's extremely effective. If you're already a touch-typer, a few hours should be enough to type well enough for Memrise.
YouTube: Russian With Max's 'For Beginners' Playlist was really helpful and motivating, at this point. He speaks slowly, simply, and clearly enough that I could understand him, where I couldn't understand anyone else yet.
I... God, I hate the A0-A1 stage so much. You can't do anything. At least now, I can watch TikToks, read comments, enjoy memes, and understand enough of those to enjoy myself. The stage where you understand nothing is by far the most awful to me. I wish I had anything to make it more bearable, but it's really just the worst. Hopefully you're either past this already, or close to past it. The small mercy is that it doesn't take too long to claw your way out of.
A1-A2 (helpful now)
[Active Immersion] Memrise + Reading/Watching (comp input): keep working through vlarya's 10k deck. My routine is: speed review due cards; finish the 10 cards I started learning yesterday; start learning 10 new words today. That's my reps and warmup. Then, depending on my mood, I'll either read at least 30 mins of 'Дом, в котором...' (with or without audiobook, again depending on mood), or watch at least 30 mins of Max's intermediate vids w/ Russian subtitles. Sometimes in my free time I'll watch Russian lit or ДВК TikToks.
[Passive Immersion] Music/Audiobooks/Let's Plays: pretty self-explanatory. My passive input isn't as comprehensible rn, but I focus on things I enjoy. A let's play to fall asleep to, an audiobook while I'm doing something that requires on-and-off focus. The goal here is just to understand snatches of whatever I can, not so much the whole thing. Eventually, those snatches become more frequent.
I'm sure more dedicated study would help me a lot right now, but I don't really have the time or motivation to, so I don't try to force it.
Regarding Russian language learning YouTube channels, and why I only recommend Max:
I've found that most popular Russian learning YouTube channels feel... well, like school. They're not very interesting, they don't feel very organic. It doesn't feel like I'd be watching their videos for any other reason than learning Russian, which is bad for me, because I need to make Russian part of my life to have any motivation to do it.
So, the reason I like Max's channel so much is that he talks about things that're actually interesting and relevant to me. This video is a personal favourite, but he has a lot of videos about all sorts of topics--some of which I'm genuinely interested in. And his demeanour is more vlogger, less teacher. I like him as a person. (Protip: in this stage, don't be afraid to start his intermediate videos early, even if you don't feel you're there yet. It can still be very helpful to pick out the words you do know, and most of his videos have Russian and English subtitles if you're confused.)
Regarding how to find a good Russian book to read:
I... don't know. Reading ДВК with the audiobook really, really helped with my reading ability, and continues to. I can't state enough how important it was for me. But how to find a book that you can read over and over again... I don't know. I just know that Harry Potter would be absolute torture.
I've seen people say that you should start reading simple things, like children's stories. I personally haven't done much of that, because children's stories bore me out of my mind, but if you like them then I'd give that a shot. I've also heard that Chekhov's stories are good for beginners (I've heard that about Pushkin too, but I'm not sure how easy poetry would be to understand). Read-alongs on YouTube could be good too. Russian With Max has some old livestream read-alongs, and there are plenty of Russian read-alongs on YouTube.
Aside - if you're curious about 'Дом, в котором...', this fan-made trailer is the entire reason I picked up ДВК; the vibes captivated me and I had to know what it was about. So for anyone interested: if the trailer looks cool to you, you may like the book. The English translation is called 'The Gray House'. ДВК is fairly long, and different POV characters have differing levels of complexity with the language. The early chapters are the simpler ones, conveniently, so starting from the beginning should be fine. It's a slice-of-life type story, so easy to pick up and put down. I recommend the Князев audiobook, which is almost certainly the one you'll find if you search 'дом в котором аудиокнига' (it's a fan-made audiobook, so I don't think you can buy it, but like LOTR the fan version is by far the best).
Resources
r/languagelearning's resources page is a good place to skim through, see if anything sticks out. I recommend reading through their 'How to Teach Yourself a Foreign Language'. It's good for giving you an idea of how different people learn, different learning methods, how those methods work for others, and what might work for you.
Refold's Roadmap is very helpful for me to understand where I'm currently at, and what sort of activities it would be beneficial for me to be working on. I use their definition of levels (i.e. A1), so if I wasn't clear what I meant by A1 vs A2, reading through this could be helpful.
SRS:
Anki's for decks I have to create myself, or if I need a more specialised deck. I prefer Memrise for vocab, mainly for typing practise and the better UI. If you want to use Anki for vocab: Refold's ru15k deck is good for A2+. There are plenty of simple word decks to pick from for A0-A1. If you want to word mine to create your own Anki decks, see FLTR below.
Grammar:
New Penguin Russian Course is supposed to be good for grammar. I looked through it, and it does look good. If you understand grammar. I don't, but putting it here for those who do.
Reading:
u/La_Nuit_Americaine's post about reading helps me with motivation, and gave me some pointers about how to do it.
FLTR (Foreign Language Text Reader) is a good Windows program alternative to LingQ, if you can't or don't want to pay for LingQ's subscription. You have to input the word definitions yourself. I used Reverso and Yandex Translate together for this. Your word list can be exported to Anki.
ReadLang is supposed to be a good web-based alternative to LingQ (its free level is still usable, unlike LingQ's). I've not used it much, but it seems pretty good. My preference is using some translation extension that will let you click on a word and automatically translate it and move on quickly. Simple Translate on Firefox is what I use.
Video Media:
Language Reactor is a subtitle extension for YouTube, Netflix, etc. that has a bunch of cool features. I hardly use it because it's not on Firefox, but if you use Chrome, Opera, etc., it's really handy. For YouTube, it will translate the auto-generated subs for videos, so if you have a Russian video that only has Russian auto-generated subtitles, you can use Language Reactor to get English subtitles.
Other ADHD Accommodations:
Being kind to myself is very important. I can't make myself study by thinking "why can't you just" or "it's not that hard, what's wrong with you". I can't make myself study with positive words either, but using positive language helps my morale so that I have more motivation to study more often.
I use a different browser (Opera) solely for learning Russian. I chose Opera because Language Reactor works on it (would've used Chrome but Chrome is set up for work), but the general idea is having a separate space for Russian. I put Opera's language in Russian, and I keep all my Russian-learning tabs open there, so that when I'm ready to study it's as simple as opening Opera. Having it separated like that also helps my brain see active study as a task that can be opened and closed, rather than combined with everything else (Firefox).
I try to give myself enough options of things to do for immersion that it's always a choice. My brain has so many different states: motivated; unmotivated; foggy; clear; distracted; focused. Each one will want--or even need--something different. If it's a foggy day, I may be able to read along ДВК with an audiobook, but not able to read words without that help. If I'm distracted, TikToks may help more than reading; if I'm focused, reading may help more than TikToks. Or if I'm completely unmotivated, watching one of Max's vids is more passive than reading, therefore less painful.
I love Russian. Not much to this one. I don't think I could stick to learning a language I didn't love for the sake of the language itself.
I wasted time and motivation watching things I wasn't interested in, trying to find media in Russian that appealed to me. I don't recommend that. I don't know the alternative, but I always felt horrible about myself after. It's important to have media you like, but forcing it won't work. Russian movies don't interest me. Everyone else's favourite Russian YouTubers don't appeal to me at all. TikTok is much better for me in that regard, because I can search for specific fandoms that interest me. Luck seems to be the only thing that works for finding good YouTubers.
Textbooks are my kryptonite. I can't use them. They drain motivation so fast. If they work for you, that's great. If they don't, I don't know that forcing it is the solution. It wasn't for me.
I scroll language learning subreddits sometimes for motivation. It's not productive, generally. But it's fun. And I do get some ideas sometimes.
I've mostly accepted that my progress is going to be slower than others. I'm trying not to compare myself. I'm enjoying it now, mostly, learning slowly but learning, and each time I reaffirm that that's okay, it becomes truer.
#if you've things that've helped you feel free to share too#this is just some stuff that helped me#but for example I've no reference for how helpful texbooks can be since they drain my motivation so much I fear using them#so things like grammar are a definite weak point for me and I never learned how to study it#(doesn't help that English grammar never made sense to me either)#so yeah definitely you or anyone else feel free to add on to this#or correct something you feel I was wrong/vague about#can't say enough how much this is my own experience and I'm by no means an authority#this is all what I would've told myself and it's very personalised#resources#Russian#I don't expect all of this to be helpful or even right#but I hope that in providing everything I can think of something will stick out and help
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the United States scaling back what it considers human rights violations by removing these categories...not concerning in the slightest 😬
source
#personal#us politics#time for my caveats that 1) I recognize that many other countries (some referrenced in the article) experience far worse examples of these#issues than the us does or almost certainly will end up seeing and 2) the framing of the us as the world's human rights watchdog is both a#laughably charitable take on our relative lack of such issues even at the best of times and has always been a tool for this country to exert#influence on others for its own ends regardless of the actual human rights violations or lack thereof taking place it's complicated I get it#But I Would Just Like To Be Allowed To Be Worried About The Implications For The Future Of The Place I Live Please OK Thank You
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I think doing shipping through and aroace lens makes things complicated but also interesting. I think one reason I don't enjoy straight ships as much is because it's very rare for people write/talk about them with a queerplatonic dynamic. straight romance is so "normalized" in society, it's hard to get any other dynamic out of those ships from other people in conversation or writing. it's mostly always romantic. (especially when "guys and girls can't be *just* friends" is extremely common and has ruined mamy of my own friendships) but I enjoy a handful of a straight ship with that dynamic. it's just way more rare to see talked about than gay ones from my observation. anyway point is, more queerplatonic type ships and stuff please! those aren't explored enough!
#its really hard for me to describe what queer platonic means to me and how i see it and how that applies to ships i enjoy or even irl#i guess one way to explain it is being life partners without the need for romantic/sexual stuff and they dont date other people#dedicated to each other for life and act like partners but arent romantic/sexual about it.#example are cynonari. they adopter collei togther and are dedicated to each other. but theyre very fun as queer platonic relationship#and for straight version theres himeko and welt. a strong pair. work well togther. our train parents. platonic but life partners#partners in this crazy space train adventure that take care of us gremlin kids#and then theres also the queer straight platonic dynamic that's fun as well. 2 queers who form a straight platonic ship#think kafblade. how i like to imagine it is a lesbian and agender-aroace-gay-in-previous-life come together as platonic life partners#playing with this stuff and going outside the normal gender/sexuality box is fun#lee text#lee rambles#ive seen hi3 fans get very loudly upset about hsr fans shipping himeko and welt. but i never see them discussed as queerplatonic!#it could make everyone happy haha. life partners but not the romance. theyre our train parents but they arent a married couple!#disclaimer: ship your own ships. this is only about my ships and how i feel#before identifying as nonbinary i was subjected to the whole “guys and girls cant be just friends” bulshit and lost friends over it#im not even allowed to be friends with people as an aroace if im seem as a binary gender!!!!! it makes me so angry#i think straight shipping as an aroace that enjoys queerplatonic dynamics is a very weird trigger for bad feelings from those experiences😅#but its not why i prefer thos dynamic. the why is just being aroace in general and wanting that kind of relationship if i had a partner#but having a side of straight obsessed people ruining our friendships over their straight obsession feels bad#by straight obsession i mean we cant be friends anymore because they decided they saw me as a binary gender opposite theirs 🙄#and accused me of liking them and said im the one that ruined the relationship#where was i going with this i think im just rambling and info dumping about my brain stuff too much 😅
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i don’t mean this in a way where I think I’m smarter or above others but it really baffles me how people can repeat the same mistakes and never learn from them, keeping yourself miserable or in a dead end situation and causing damage to yourself and/or others repeatedly. (This is more related to keeping yourself stuck in a mentality versus things like poverty, marginalization etc. too btw) it takes a number of tries to get things right and I get that, I’ve been there myself and didn’t believe in my own growth too. Idk this is mostly just about people I know, have been close to, like seeing them go wrong for years, or their entire life, doing the same things over and over with horrible results, and I just can’t imagine .. is it lack of self awareness? do you stay there bc at least you know what’s going to happen? I absolutely despise feeling stagnant or like I’m not getting better or at least trying to, I can’t imagine wasting away decades of my life destroying relationships, causing pain and stunting my own growth for fear of the unkown. When the known is so painful how could that be comforting enough to stay? Sometimes I get the feeling… or maybe irrational fear, that I’ve been eating through a lot of life lessons lately, ones I’ve seen others stuck in for years and years, and that that must mean I’m going to die before I get to be old. But I don’t know, I simultaneously feel like I’ve learned so much so quickly and that I also don’t know much at all either.
#text#I’ve definitely been guilty of keeping myself miserable too so this isn’t to shame anyone#I only came out to my family when I was 22 and started being Out closer to 24#that was like my hardest cycle to break honestly. I thought I was ‘protecting myself’ but it was the opposite#did a lot of dumb shit but breaking That also taught me to never be the one to keep myself miserable again#so idk… I just never want to feel that way again so it’s hard to see people you know not helping themself#<- in different situations too. just used my own experience as an example
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So the book club that I've been in since 2022 has 9 regular members now including me, and we have collectively read a total of 28 books together now. This month we put all of our book choices and the members' ratings of the books on an Excel spreadsheet, and have been having fun figuring out various trends and statistics and so on – what decades we have mostly read from, what countries, what genres, what our most and least highly rated picks were for each year, etc. I also thought it would be fun to use the spreadsheet on my own to figure out who rates things most and least similarly to each other in the club. What shocked me was that I found out that I scored the number one most similar/compatible rater to every single other person in the club except two (I was 2nd most similar rater for somebody and 4th most similar rater for the other). Also, apparently me and the guy who I scored least compatible with based on our ratings/taste have the top rated book selections on average in the club so far. I'm not at all sure what this means except that I just know from now on I'm going to have this secret semi-subconscious goal in my mind of inching my way higher in this one outlier book club member's taste compatibility scoring for 2025 hahaha
#not like in a 'im going to change my ratings or book selections intentionally to do so' way#just like in a 'im going to be paying closer attention to this from now on and watching it with interest' sort of way#because there's nothing i love more than setting myself dumb secret challenges and experiments#this book club member also scored as the member with the most unpredictable ratings i think?#you just never know what he's gonna think of something which makes it interesting i suppose#like for example when i was being really harsh on study for obedience he ended up rating it 4 stars#also there are SO many questions in my mind about why i am most compatible with 6 out of 8 of the members there rn#like is it mostly because of me or them or just a mix of both#i plotted our ratings out on a line for each book and saw that very often i tend to be in the middling upper portion of the ratings we give#like im almost never the one giving it the highest rating of all but im also usually more generous with the stars i give than the others#and ive never given the lowest rating in the group of all on any book either#so is it just like not being too extreme but also slightly more positive with your ratings leads to being most likely to match others?#i think it must also depend on how other people are rating them. like are they using other people's ratings to decide their own or not#i tend to try to just rate the books based purely on my own taste and regardless of what the others thought#but idk about everybody else#also im glad that i think most of us are also trying to be fair like we will rate our own books low if we genuinely didn't enjoy them too#ALSO AT THE END OF THE DAY book club is definitely about more than just slapping a star rating on a book#and the star rating sometimes has little to do with how great a book club discussion you'll get out of it#but i still think we're having a friendly competition over trying to get the highest ratings from the others#idk sorry this is how i actually have fun hahaha like this is my team sports#another weird stat i found interesting was that i have given out an average of 3.15 stars to the books#and my selections for the club have been rated an average of 3.14 stars by the group#i was the only member to have these numbers be so close together as well#p
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I cannot understand how american """"centrists"""" (see: slightly less right than the alt-right) who are "neutral" either way think they sound reasonable. My family is so insistent that trump getting re-elected is fine at best and completely neutral at worst and keep going on about how he was "so good for the economy" and "well it's not going to affect your life so why are you so worried" (yes, they actually fucking said this to me) first of all I do not just care about what happens to me. Shocking I know. But also as a queer woman yes the fuck it will. Like oh it's so nice that they added the right to abortion to our state constitution!! Can't imagine how that could ever be changed surely there won't be anyone in a position of power that has a higher authority than states that would ever want to do anything to override that!!! (/s if that wasn't clear) my parents claim to be against all forms of misogyny, racism, homophobia, transphobia, ableism, as well as the genocide being committed against Palestinians. Or at least say they are and convince themselves they are so they can sleep at night. And still they cannot fucking comprehend how a rapist and convicted felon who has made it abundantly clear he is in opposition to all of what they claim to support, and has admitted to actively helping sabotage ceasefire efforts, would be goddamn devastating to have as president. But of course they don't believe he's any of those things. Every single piece of evidence of every obviously horrible thing he has done or said is, to them, is either taken out of context, not true, exaggerated, or Not That Bad, Actually. or if they can't claim any of that, then they'll decide its a worthy sacrifice since they think he'll help the economy or whatever shit. They think the worst thing he's done is sound like kind of an asshole whenever he speaks publically. I know this sounds so ridiculous and backwards and I wouldn't believe anyone could fucking think like this if i didnt live with these people. Maybe my family are outliers, but it just seems like so many people are either living under a rock or so Marianas-trench-level deep in denial about what they're supporting that they've become completely disconnected from reality.
#rant#us politics#i know this is probably highly specific to my own experiences and who i know#but i think its a good example of how so many americans are in so deep in the mindset of ''eh none of this matters why are you so worried''
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I have successfully channeled Kevin Day's method of coping and can confirm that the morning after is absolute fucking garbage.
#no but seriously dont use alcohol to cope#it only brings shitty experiences#i for one tend to have panic attacks when drunk#not fun#dont follow my or kevins example#go to therapy#lets ignore the fact that i dont follow my own advice#aftg#all for the game#kevin day
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Thank you so much for answering my question! I'm kinda new to fanfiction (not that I didnt know it existed but I literally have never seen or engaged with any until like a month ago lol) and so I just wanted to get your perspective on something I dont really understand yet. I'm autistic so I guess sometimes it's just hard for me to see/imagine characters as anything but how they are in canon, but I understand that it would be totally boring to write fanfic that only follows canon! I kinda see fanfic as that writers version of the character, like that's your specific version of Dabi and other writers have their versions of Dabi and maybe they're completely different 🤔 and I guess in my head it made more sense to me to just make a new character to make them exactly how you want and then you wouldn't have to worry about canon at all lol (because my mind wont let me see characters differently sometimes) but I get it now that you explained :) so if you dont mind me asking in your au's what happened differently in dabi/ touyas life to make him a sexual person? In canon I dont really see Dabi as a sexual person like he couldn't be bothered with relationships or anything sexual, like I almost see him as being asexual. So what kind of changed for him in your au's to make him more sexual and willing to have relationships? And thanks again for taking the time to explain for me, I really appreciate it 😊💕
hello again!! c: oh i’m glad i could help! <3 i mean, ultimately, just like all other fiction, it’s all personal preference. some people only like to read in-canon fic and some people only like to read AUs and some people like both, etc etc etc and it’s all totally and completely fine! i think you seeing fanfic as that specific writer’s version of a character/characters makes complete sense and, in a way, is also true—we are each expressing our own interpretations of him! so i absolutely get where you’re coming from there c: and i think your reasoning for being confused makes sense, too!
oh that’s a good question! unfortunately, i don’t have an answer for you, though, because i personally have always interpreted canon dabi as someone who would use casual sex (and drugs!) to try (and fail) to fill the gaping void in his chest. it is 100% fine if you disagree with me, and i will always encourage anyone to interpret any character however they’d like to. the beauty with art and fiction is that there’s technically no wrong answer to a lot of this stuff—if you personally see dabi as someone who is asexual, then he is asexual! if i see him as a sexual being, then he is a sexual being! we can have our own conflicting views on him and who he is, because he isn’t real, and he can be whoever we want him to be. does that make sense? let me know if you have any other questions or something seems unclear and i will try my best to further explain myself! <3
#i also believe that a lot of our interpretations of art + characters come from our own personal experiences#so for example: as someone who has suffered a lot of similar trauma to dabi i *also* used vices to try and fill the gaping hole the trauma#left in my chest. as such it makes sense that i might see or understand dabi as doing something similar!#sometimes we will use these characters as tools and vehicles to work through and process trauma etc.#we find a lot of comfort and catharsis through these characters right?#i really hope this makes sense and i'm articulating myself properly#but i am always open to further discussion if you need it! <3#my main point though is: there is no right or wrong way to interpret a specific character#they are whoever you want them to be#your interpretation is just as valid as anyone else's interpretation#don't ever let anyone else tell you differently. as long as we can be respectful toward others even if we disagree with them or don't share#their interpretation; that is what matters#the only thing that isn't okay is someone being rude toward you just because you don't share their personal interpretation#anyway! yeah! i am so sleepy so i hope this isn't all just a jumbled mess HAHAHA#have a fabulous day anon and stay hydrated!!! <3#inky.bb#clari gets mail
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It continues to trip me up how much human brains are just weird organic computers
#thoughts#oni talks#oni vents#additionally wild that the easiest ways for me to explain brain stuff are generally in computer or video game terms despite the fact I’m#notoriously awful with computers (and to a lesser extent video games) although I won’t if my natural inclination would be different if I#didn’t have trauma related to computers/if maybe it’s the classic adhd interest based learning difference? unknown tbh#I still really wanna go to school to study people but academics is fucked as hell so making that work will be a personal hell for me#but also I have so many theories and data I can’t do anything super tangible with coz I’m not in an academic setting so even if i wanted to#talk about stuff and work on it no one would take me seriously w/o that academic background no matter how much effort I’d put in learning it#on my own for my entire life at this point it won’t matter if it’s not on some level acknowledged by an academic system I despise tbh#it’s one of those things that makes me miss my dad coz we used to commiserate together about these sorts of things tho he made it work far#better than I have been able to. i wish i could ask him science questions again.#anyway human brains are so fascinating but also I really wish I was better at explaining myself analysis of people I feel like I’m good#enough at this point to be like partway understood coz I’ve done so much practice on my own coz I tend to rehearse explanations ahead of tim#but its still often misunderstood or misconstrued & it’s understandable a lot of the time coz like most other people aren’t spending a ton#of their free time thinking about and researching how people work/analyzing those around them+themselves vs me whose been doing since like#I dont remember the exact time but I do remember being really young & making the conscious decision to study & analyze my family for example#so that I could be helpful & translate their words to each other better + ppl often don’t see things about themselves that others do#also forever thinking about the human brain/experience in relation to the sims & video game commands lmao#currently trying to explain save states in the human brain to ppl but no one knows wtf I’m talking about#& researching academic terms that are close to what I want doesn’t necessarily work if there’s no academic term for what I’m talking about#hence wanting to do the research myself coz sometimes it feels like there’s all this stuff that’s obvious to me but no one else?? from what#I’ve seen in recent studies they are only starting to scratch the surface of stuff I’ve already known sometimes? other stuff is older & it’s#VERY gratifying when it’s stuff I’ve known but not been listened to about & it actually gets the proper recognition#though getting ppl to actually listen/take what I say seriously is its own journey & I have to be careful myself bc I’m human so my own#understanding/data is constantly updating + I have storage issues so finding the data I have in my brain is its own struggle sometimes#every version of me is interested in people & I think that’s neat even if other people don’t understand that concept#sometimes I feel like an alien/robot whose sole task is just to study & support humanity & it’s very weird tbh
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( ooc ): All my social work classes aren't helping me in my characterizations here. I'm psychoanlyzing my muses in the middle of class.
#( ooc )#( I literally have used my own muses as examples in my notes of specific group member dynamics )#( I guess I'm learning with real life associations?? )#( I feel like Freud rn because I'm making these crazy comparisons with my muses who experience trauma since that's a huge topic in class )
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i appreciated this study: "They Can't Read Very Well: A Study of the Reading Comprehension Skills Of English Majors At Two Midwestern Universities"
[ETA: if you are somehow finding your way here pls note some - not exhaustive!!!! - follow up notes in this reblog. sorry again i mixed up megalodons and megalosaurs]
essentially, a pair of professors set out to test their intuitive sense that students at the college level were struggling with complex text. they recruited 85 students, a mix of english majors and english education majors - so, theoretically, people focusing on literature, and people preparing to teach adolescents how to read literature - and had them read-while-summarizing the first seven paragraphs of dickens's bleak house (or as much as they made it through in the 20 minute session). they provided dictionaries and also said students could use their phones to look up whatever they wanted, including any unfamiliar words or references. they found that the majority of the students - 58%, or 49 out of the 85 students - functionally could not understand dickens at all, and only 5% - a mere 4 out of the 85 students - proved themselves proficient readers (leaving the remaining 38%, or 32 students, as what the study authors deemed "competent" students, most of whom could understand about half the literal meaning - pretty low bar for competence - although a few of whom, they note, did much better than the rest in this group if not quite well enough to be considered proficient).
what i really appreciated about this study was its qualitative descriptions of the challenges and reading behaviors of what the authors call "problematic readers" (that bottom 58%), which resonated strongly with my own experiences of students who struggle with reading. here's their blunt big picture overview of these 49 students:
The majority of these subjects could understand very little of Bleak House and did not have effective reading tactics. All had so much trouble comprehending concrete detail in consecutive clauses and phrases that they could not link the meaning of one sentence to the next. Although it was clear that these subjects did try to use various tactics while they read the passage, they were not able to use those tactics successfully. For example, 43 percent of the problematic readers tried to look up words they did not understand, but only five percent were able to look up the meaning of a word and place it back correctly into a sentence. The subjects frequently looked up a word they did not know, realized that they did not understand the sentence the word had come from, and skipped translating the sentence altogether.
the idea that they had so much trouble with every small piece of a text that they could not connect ideas on a sentence by sentence basis is very familiar to me from teaching and tutoring, as was the habit of thought seen in the example of the student who gloms on to the word "whiskers" in a sea of confusion and guesses incorrectly that a cat is present - struggling readers, in my experience, seem to use familiar nouns as stepping stones in a flood of overwhelm, hopping as best they can from one seemingly familiar image to the next. so was this observation, building off the example of a student who misses the fact that dickens is being figurative when he imagines a megalodon stalking the streets of london:
She first guesses that the dinosaur is just “bones” and then is stuck stating that the bones are “waddling, um, all up the hill” because she can see that Dickens has the dinosaur moving. Because she cannot logically tie the ideas together, she just leaves her interpretation as is and goes on to the next sentence. Like this subject, most of the problematic readers were not concerned if their literal translations of Bleak House were not coherent, so obvious logical errors never seemed to affect them. In fact, none of the readers in this category ever questioned their own interpretations of figures of speech, no matter how irrational the results. Worse, their inability to understand figurative language was constant, even though most of the subjects had spent at least two years in literature classes that discussed figures of speech. Some could correctly identify a figure of speech, and even explain its use in a sentence, but correct responses were inconsistent and haphazard. None of the problematic readers showed any evidence that they could read recursively or fix previous errors in comprehension. They would stick to their reading tactics even if they were unhappy with the results.
i have seen this repeatedly, too - actually i was particularly taken with how similar this is to the behavior of struggling readers at much younger ages - and would summarize the hypothesis i have forged over time as: struggling readers do not expect what they read to make sense. my hypothesis for why this is the case is that their reading deficits were not attended to or remediated adequately early enough, and so, in their formative years - the early to mid elementary grades - they spent a lot of time "reading" things that did not make sense to them - in fact they spent much more time doing this than they ever did reading things that did make sense to them - and so they did not internalize a meaningful subjective sense of what it feels like to actually read things.
like, i've said this before, but the year i taught third grade i had multiple students who told me they loved reading and then when i asked them about a book they were reading revealed that they had absolutely no idea what was going on - on a really basic literal level like "didn't know who said which lines of dialogue" and "couldn't identify which things or characters given pronouns referred to" - and were as best as i could tell sort of constructing their own story along the way using these little bits of things they thought they understood. that's what "reading" was, in their heads. and they were, in the curriculum/model that we used at the private school where i taught, receiving basically no support to clarify that that was not what reading was, nor any instruction that would actually help them with what they needed to do to improve (understand sentences) - and i realized over the course of that year that the master's program that had certified me in teaching elementary school had provided me with very little understanding of how to help these kids (with perhaps the sole exception of the class i took on communications disorders, not because these kids had communications disorders but because that was the only class where we ever talked, even briefly, about things like sentence structures that students may need instruction in and practice with to comprehend independently). when it comes to the literal, basic understanding of a text, the model of reading pedagogy i was taught has about 6 million little "tools" that all boil down to telling kids who functionally can't read to try harder to read. this is not productive, in my experience and opinion, for kids whose maximum effort persistently yields confusion. but things are so dysfunctional all the way up and down the ladder that you can be a senior in college majoring in english without anyone but a pair of professors with a strong work ethic noticing that you can't actually read.
couple other notes:
obviously it's a small study but i'm not sure i see a reason to believe these are particularly outlierish results (ACT scores - an imperfect metric but not a meritless one IMO for reading specifically, where the task mostly really is to read a set of texts written for the educated layperson and answer factual questions about them - were a little bit above the national average)
the study was published last year, but the research was conducted january to april 2015. so there's no pandemic influence, no AI issue - these are millennials who now would span roughly ages 28-32 (i guess it's possible one of the four first-year students was one of the very first members of gen z lol). if you're in your late 20s or early 30s, we are talking about people your age, and whatever the culprit is here, it was happening when you were in school.
i think some people might want to blame this on NCLB but i find this unconvincing for a variety of reasons. first of all, NCLB did not pass because everyone in 2001 agreed that education was super hunky-dory; in fact, the sold a story podcast outlines how an explicit goal of NCLB was to train teachers in systematic phonics instruction, because that was not the norm when NCLB was passed, and an unfortunate outcome was that phonics became politicized in ed world. second, anyone who understands anything about reading should need about ten minutes max to spend some time on standardized test prep and recognize that if your goal is truly to maximize scores... then the vast majority of your instructional time should be spent on improving actual reading skills because you actually can't meaningfully game these tests by "practicing main idea questions" (timothy shanahan addresses this briefly near the top of this post). so i find it very difficult to believe that any school that pivoted to multiple choice drill time in an attempt to boost reading scores was teaching reading effectively pre-NCLB, because no set of competent literacy professionals would think that would work even for the goal of raising test scores. third, NCLB mandated yearly testing in grades 3-8 but only one test year in high school; kansas set its reading and math test year in high school as tenth grade. so theoretically these kids all had two years of sweet sweet freedom from NCLB in which their teachers could have done whatever the fuck they wanted to teach these kids to actually read. the fact that they didn't suggests perhaps there were other problems afoot. fourth, and maybe most saliently for this particular study, the sample text was the first seven paragraphs of a novel - in other words, the exact kind of short incomplete text that NCLB allegedly demanded excessive time spent on. i'm not really sure what universe it makes sense in that students who can't read the first seven paragraphs of a novel would have become much better reader if everything else had been the same but they had been making completely wack associations based on nonsense guesses for all 300 pages instead. (if you read the study it's really clear that for problematic readers, things go off the rails immediately, in a way that a good program targeted at teaching mastery of text of 500 words or less would have done something about.)
all but 3 of the students reported A's and B's in their english classes and, again, 69% of them are juniors and seniors, so like... i mean idk kudos to these professors for being like "hold up can these kids actually read?" but clearly something is wack at the college level too [in 2015] if you can make your way through nearly an entire english major without being able to read the first seven paragraphs of a dickens novel. (once again i really do encourage you to look at the qualitative samples in the study, lest you think i am being uncharitable by summarizing understandable misunderstandings or areas of confusion that may resolve themselves with further exposure to the text as "can't read.") not to mention the fact that most students could not what they had learned in previous or current english classes and when asked to name british and american authors and/or works of the nineteenth century, roughly half the sample at each college could name at most one.
the authors of the study are struck by the fact that students who cannot parse the first 3 sentences of bleak house feel very confident about their ability to read the entire novel, and discover that this seeming disconnect is resolved by the fact that these students seem to conceptualize "reading" as "skimming and then reading sparknotes." i think it's really tempting to Kids These Days this phenomenon (although again these are people who in some cases have now been in the workforce for a decade) and categorize it as laziness or a lack of effort, but i think that there is, as i described above, a real and sincere confusion over what "reading" is in which this makes a certain logical sense because it's not like they have some store of actual reading experiences to compare it to. i also think it's pretty obvious looking at just how wildly severed from actual textual comprehension their readings are that these are not - or at least not entirely - students who could just work harder and master the entirety of bleak house all on their own. like i don't think you get from "charles dickens is describing a bunch of dinosaur bones actually walking the streets of london" to comfortably reading nineteenth century literature by just trying harder. i really just don't (and i say that acknowledging i personally have had students who like... were good readers if i was forcing them to work at it constantly... but i have also had students, including ones getting ready to enter college, who were clearly giving me everything they had and what they had was at the present moment insufficient). i think that speaks to a missing skillset that they don't know are missing, because they don't have any other experience of "reading" to compare it to.
just wanna highlight again that although they don't give the breakdown some of these students are not just english majors but english education majors a.k.a. the high school english teachers of tomorrow. some of them may be teaching high school english right now, in case anyone wishes to consider whether "maybe some high school english teachers can't read the first seven paragraphs of bleak house?" should be kept in mind when we discuss present-day educational ills.
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