#very incoherent

[paradizetobefound]

The thing about the seeds and soil is that if people in the abbey already had prejudice against sarkaz, could this kind of soil grow seeds of true unity? Would any of these people have accepted a group of sarkaz led by a mercenary if they were not despairing? One of the liberi folks accused, that the sarkaz took no part in their religion and thus remained outsiders, but can religion of Laterano accept them if Laterano itself is built on rejection of Sarkaz? And can it be truly said that they were accepted if they remained apart? So was the abbey doomed from the start?

Yet it fell apart because it could not support itself, but can Laterano support itself? Do we know if it doesn't rely on the rest of the world to feed its happiness? Can we say that the paradize was false just because it fell apart? The 'paradize' of Abbey is not same as 'paradize' of Laterano, the 'paradize' of Laterano exists in its opposition. Which one is true? Do any of them have to be real?

The thing is, I do not think it matters if any of these paradizes are real or fake. I think what matters is that the people sought them and that they did their best to preserve them. I think it matters is that the people of Laterano themselves, without any input from their God, might be willing to burn the world if it means preserving their dream of Laterano, if such choice ever arises. Just the same as that within the heart of Clement there was a decision to burn the Abbey down so that it would never wake up from its dream.

[your-royal-momoness]

Zuko, hungover: please tell me I’m imagining that I claimed I was the king of all the turtleducks

Sokka: I would, but then I’d be lying to the King of All Turtleducks

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

he is just. so shaped. so so so So shaped.

[wordsinhaled]

my ‘crowley loves aziraphale’ post needs a companion because there needs to be absolutely no doubt that aziraphale is ABSOLUTELY as gone on crowley so…

here i am just thinking about aziraphale’s “smitten, i believe…you’re being silly 🥰” and “why don’t you wait inside? you like waiting inside” (aziraphale knows what crowley likes, what makes him happy!). it’s aziraphale telling crowley he gets plenty of use out of the[ir] bookshop and it’s aziraphale making sure crowley feels welcome to come in whenever he likes and that it’s crowley’s as much as his to the point where crowley just feels comfortable making hot chocolate there

it’s the way he touches crowley so easily (hand on the shoulder in the s2 finale, arm around the waist in the graveyard support, hand on the chest and sliding down, the way aziraphale clasps crowley’s hand in both of his with such enthusiasm in 1941 when it could’ve been a prim handshake, the way their hands almost curl together when they’re dancing at the ball…)

(and that last one makes me unwell, because if their ball had been during the actual regency they would both have been wearing gloves… but at aziraphale’s ball, their hands can touch without any layer between, and he even seizes crowley by the hand to pull him onto the dance floor like he’s waited his entire life to do it)

thinking about the way aziraphale has always looked at crowley from the very beginning, soft, soft, so impossibly, unbearably soft. the way he darts little glances at him whenever he can, like he’s indulging himself in looking

thinking of the way he takes obvious pleasure in introducing crowley to people and saying they go back a long time. thinking of how when gabriel spoke about one person making everything alright aziraphale immediately thought of crowley

thinking about how we’ve always seen them dine or drink in public places but then in 1941 they’re having a private candlelit dinner, just the two of them

thinking of the way aziraphale looks at crowley at the end of the season - as crowley’s putting his glasses back on for the final time - in this earnest, intent, searching way. even in the midst of this argument he’s thinking why are you closing yourself off from me? you don’t do that anymore, we’re not like that anymore. it’s like he’s trying to read crowley’s features, like everything will fall into place if they just look at each other properly

thinking of how aziraphale touches his own lips after the kiss like he can press the memory of crowley’s mouth into them to keep forever

in short… aziraphale loves crowley so much it’s devastating

[liz-wes]

Holy hell... we're in trouble. So much trouble.

THE ARTFUL DODGER, 1.06 "Bully in the Alley"

[terracottakore]

i think false should be able to do anything she wants 💚💛❤️

week one of @shepscapades hermit character design challenge! thank you for hosting this lovely event

[bloodywankers]

tw. yandere, forced pregnancy, mentions of nudity, toxic relationships, implied murder, not proofread (pls tell me if you see any typos), 1.4k words

You knew your husband wasn’t normal. You weren’t a fool, the avoiding gazes of people around you, the nervous stutter of every waiter and service person that approached you, the hesitance of new aquintaces when they had to shake hands with you, all of it under his watchful gaze. It was hard to ignore.

If you had to put a finger on when it started, you’d blame that one time years ago, when you were both still young, much younger than you are now at least. When you complained about that one classmate that always got too handsy, about his annoying jokes and obnoxious personality, all under the guise of “a joke” as tasteless as it might have been. You knew he wasn’t fully okay in the head, even back then. It was by no mistake that you found yourself complaining to him of all people, sure he was a bit more reserved than now, a bit more hesitant at the thought of potentially committing a crime but all it took was a fluttering your eyes at him a few times and he offered himself up for you, he had never been the smartest of the buch after all.

When you heard news that the classmate had apparently dropped out and been seen with injuries beyond what any sane person would inflict, you knew who to blame. But you wouldn’t, maybe your underdeveloped prefrontal lobe couldn’t grasp the concept morality back then. But a guard dog that shows such loyalty couldn’t possibly deserve punishment. It was then when you cemented future by his side. He wasn’t all too bad, you thought, if you could avoid any and all contact with the opposite gender, even with women you could never make him feel unwanted. He was needy and big and scary but extremely gullible, at least when it came to you– as long as nothing sparked his jealousy, he was beyond reasoning if that were to happen.

There were times where you cursed at yourself for your past decisions, namely when you found small splatters of blood on his clothes that you assume were too small for him to notice, or when another person you had been unhappy with (but never voiced this in front of your husband) disappeared entiorely from your life. A dog that goes and bites all those that approach its master is no good at all.

Selfish and evil as you may have been, you were still human and the thought that your mere presence could ruin someones life took a toll on you so you started to retreat into your shell, to avoid going out as much as possible, much to your husbands pleasure who started coming home on time and didn’t drift off somewhere in the middle of the might anymore. Your relationship almost started showing a semblance of normalcy.

You had started feeling exhausted as of late, too tired despite your schedule full of nothing. It was strange, you started losing appetite and under a constant spell of lethargy, too tired to do anything beyond maybe brave the journey to the bathroom when necessary or to the kitchen if your husband wasn’t home to do it for you. Then started the cravings, so strange that you doubted even a pregnant woman would have them.

That’s what you thought, until night you managed to wake up just in time to see your husband rummahging through your drawer, the small sheet of what you could only make out to be your contraceptive pills in you hand and another one that looked eerily similar (that one wasn’t yours, you were sure of this since you were down to your last sheet).

You instinctively closed your eyes again before he could turn to you, waiting until morning when he was gone to work to check your drawing, only to find one sheet. It was then when things started to click, your period had been a few weeks late, you hadn’t been particularly alarmed since it happened sometimes but now you felt fear sink in as you rushed out in your car to the nearest pharmacy. The drive felt eons long when combined with the ever increasing feelings of dread that you were experiencing but you almost wished you could go back to that time as your clothes were tossed to one side and the bathroom door left slightly ajar, you were too rushed to have cared about those details as you stared at the two lines on the test.

���No no no no no no no no no.’ You couldn’t think clear, you werent ready to be a mother, you didnt want children, there wasn’t a single motherly bone in your body.

You took back what you had said earlier, you were most definitely a fool. Why did you think he’d never do something like this when hes probably already done enough to secure his place in the 8th circle of hell just for you.

“Darling, I was looking for you-” Your husband said gleefully, pausing as he fully opened the bathroom door, finding you sat with a pregnancy test in hand, a few other ones already tossed around you, the unmistakeable positive already visible on them. And yet, as if he had no hand in this, he feiged ignorance, acted worried as he approached you.

“What’s happened here, what’re you doing, dear? Are you alright?” He kept asking these questions as he slowly neared you.

“Get away from me, don’t touch me!” You screamed, you were crying at this point and he was left at an arms length. That was when his entire demeanor changed, the almost idiotic smile of his nowhere to be seen as he let out a frustrated sigh.

“I suppose it was bound to happen sooner or later. If anything I’m surprised it took you this long, you’re quite the slow one aren’t you, love?” You probably would’ve launched the nearest object his way in any other situation but you couldn’t tell heads from tails in your current predicament.

“Why would you do this? Was what we had not enough for you?” You couldn’t help but ask in a moment of clarity.

“How coy, I wonder where this side of you was when you asked me to do all those terrible, terrible things.” His smile felt cruel, especially so when you realised that you were the dog if anything, he had always been the one to hold your leash, not the other way around.

“You dug your own grave, we couldn’ve had what most normal people have but you chose not to, you used me until your heart was fulfilled and in the process, you dug yourself deeper and deeper. The fact that you didn’t realise any sooner says more about you than me.” He finished, before hoisting you up, ignoring your cries as he removed what little you had on and placed you inside the bath. It had become a routine ever since you started feeling sick but today you couldn’t help but feel disgusted by his touch, alternating between sobs and protests as he cleaned, his grasp much harsher than usual, you weren’t sure if it was because he no longer had to uphold the persona he had you believing in up until today or because of your protests.

“Aren’t you curious, what you’ve been eating in place of your birth control lately?” He asked in the midst of washing your hair, the glint of excitement in his eyes only adding to the psychotic expression of his.

You couldn’t bear to ask, looking away in hoped that he would at least grant you this much. “Aww, I was hoping you’d want to, I’ll tell you ayway. It’s a sedative of sorts, I started with low dosages so you wouldn’t get alarmed. Don’t worry, it’s nothing strong enough to harm the baby.” The mention of the baby had your stomach twisting again. You felt exhausted from crying, letting him dress you, moving you around almost like a ragdoll until he plopped you on the bed, joining you soon after he showered and changed himself. Engulfing your smaller figure into a hug as he went on and on about the baby.

“I’ll get some books on parenting for you, we need to make sure our baby doesn’t turn out twisted and skewed like their mommy. Don’t you agree?”

[theloverislost]

ugh. something about the inherit tragedy of the fact that crystal will grow up and charles and edwin will stay sixteen forever. they’re friends but crystal still has her whole life ahead of her and edwin and charles are stuck in a sense. she can’t stay with them forever. the whole point is that she can still live past sixteen but they’ll never be able to. to stay with them is to trap herself. to stay with them is to keep herself from growing up. i have no doubt that they’ll stay friends for a long time but sometimes life is about moving on, even if you want to stay. even if you have to be dragged away kicking and screaming. even if the people you met leave irreversible imprints on your life and who you are. crystal will grow up and hurt and heal and figure out how to exist as herself, how to exist as crystal the psychic and crystal the human. crystal will grow up and the boys will forever be sixteen.

[onelonelymono]

unobtainable.

so royal's bad ending huh. i still havent finished the actual ending yet but i did the bad ending with a few friends and havent stopped thinking about it.

[awsok]

shin hati — season one character study

introduction in the odyssey, emily wilson / ahsoka, 'master and apprentice' / ahsoka, 'fallen jedi' / so we must meet apart, gabrielle bates & jennifer s. cheng / ahsoka, 'far far away' / between dog and wolf, rené-xavier prinet / ahsoka, 'far far away' / ahsoka, 'dreams and madness' / ahsoka, 'dreams and madness' / camp damascus, chuck tingle / ahsoka, 'the jedi the witch and the warlord' / the sun is also a star, nicola yoon

[rinbylin]

圣人有情而无累

dihua + 情 | 莲花楼 mysterious lotus casebook

[imalwaysaslutforthevoid]

The Summer Hikaru Died and onomatopoeia

I've wanted to gush about this topic for a while and i have no organized thoughts but a lot of feelings i need to get out. First and foremost being "Holy shit this manga is so damn loud" which is a weird feeling to have since manga is generally understood to be a silent medium.

And yet the Mangaka MokuMoku Ren has filled their work to the brim with sound. Now comics using onomatopoeia (words that echo a noise ie: crunch) is nothing new the sound of a fist hitting it's target and walls being wrecked is nothing new. But usually onomatopoeia is worked into whatever action is resulting in the noise

adding both a sense of motion as well as sound. Which is what makes The Summer Hikaru Died's use of it so unique and compelling. To utilize onomatopoiea you have to give up on space that could otherwise be going to deatil work in the background or foreground. Now this is fine with smaller unobtrusive effects like Wolverine's claw extending, and there's numerous example's where a sound will take up large portions of the page to show how loud something like a bomb going off is. But i've yet to see another comic western or otherwise so consistently use this facet of the medium to instill such claustrophobia and dread. As a slower paced horror manga The Summer Hikaru Died builds it's suspense mostly through atomosphere, the supernatural happenings weighing on the surrounding evironment until they break the surface

The use of sound is heavy, it's harsh, it's a vehicle to show how wrong things have gotten from the whisper of "it's coming" heard in the ringing bell of a train crossing to the omnipresent call of birds, bugs, and frogs that pushes in on the paneling shrinking the world with their cacophony.

the way sound shrinks the world making reader and character both feel suffocated by the drone is matched by how the manga uses silence as a way to make the characters feel exposed and vulnerable. the page is now empty of distraction the world of the story on full display and it still feels wrong it's agorophobic, at least amidst the din there was some sense of anonymity being just one voice among hundrends.

even the speech bubble feels out of place as it wanders off desperate to fill the space. The manga is full of these moments of sound and silence in some dance with eachother always too much or too little, never comfortable. It adds a lot to the horror of the manga, and is just one part of many that makes The Summer Hikaru Died such an excellent manga, every chapter I can feel my skin crawl as the setting becomes more hostile to the charactres while they uncover more of the truth of their circumstances.

[waywardsunlight]

Imagine ur a single parent trying your best to raise your kid and then one day he comes home after being kinda late and he’s like. Here’s my stinky lab rat lookin friend can he stay. And ur like. Ok. And then your former childhood friend calls and they’re like. Oh no he’s evil. But he’s like. No I’ve been good this whole time and also I’m here with all ur other childhood friends except the pro-genocide guys. and we’re taking down the government. Anyway can I borrow those kids. Also everyone’s gonna die maybe.

And ur like. Ok I guess? And then ur waking up in a space ship ?? and ur son is there with his stinky friend and all his besties and they act like it’s been months since u guys last saw each other and you realize ur kid was in another dimension fighting a serial killer. Ig? And ur just like. Ok. ???

Anyways that’s what they did to Perry Porter just so you know.

[ahollowgrave]

You make for me a portal Eyes warmеd up with sorrow

[ryuubus]

another conspiracy moment from me

so we get this scene in the opening, riiight?

i was wondering if these are supposed to be actual characters in the story or just some random students

because ive been snooping around Hamaguri-sensei's twitter (the artist for the manga) and i saw this drawing they made, and these two characters 'resemble' young dali and gerhard

(don't take my word for granted the caption says nothing relevant, but i couldn't stop myself from comparing this with the way they draw older Dali in the manga; granted this drawing was made in 2021, but a girl like me can be delusional)

anyway, what i was trying to say is

what if those two boys in the opening are actually them?! what if we get a little flashback of their young days?? like their cocoon days???

here's a link to the original tweet:

[buckleyreid]

I don’t wanna feed into the “bucktommy is purely sexual”, “bucktommy shippers are fetishizers” discourse so this will be the only thing I’ll say about that.

I think it’s incredibly interesting how there’s soooo many posts about bucktommy here on tumblr (and no doubt in other platforms too), there’s sweet wholesome posts, there’s analytical posts about their relationship, there’s headcanons, there’s fanarts and yes, there’s smutty fics too for example.

Yet, the people who are pointing fingers, calling others fetishizers, are the ones solely focused on the sexual content. Bucktommy fans aren’t the ones making their relationship all about sex, the call is coming from inside the house.

Unhinged buddies are the ones choosing to ignore the part of the scene where both characters open up about their rough family histories and, instead, are making it all about a very quick sex joke that was used to lighten the mood. And because they can’t stop at that, they then proceed to say two grown ass queer characters flirting with each other is gross, disturbing, and a reason one of them should get killed off. That’s the real disgusting thing.

This just in, gay people have sex. I know, shocking. They also talk about it, they make jokes about it. It’s almost as if it’s a normal thing- oh wait, it is. In bucktommy’s case, it’s far from being the only facet of their relationship, but it’s still there and it’s not deviant, it’s not disgusting and if it makes you so uncomfortable to think about then maybe that’s something to reflect on.

Touching grass is not enough, y’all need to roll on it like a dog excited to go on a walk. And maybe retake some reading comprehension classes too. Dead serious, grow up.