#was meant to post this last night but w me being ill n all i forogt

[killa-trav]

Fans of Borussia Dortmund hold a banner reading "football for millions of people, not billions of euros! - reclaim the game" during the UEFA Champions League match between Borussia Dortmund and AC Milan at Signal Iduna Park; Dortmund, Germany; 04.10.2023

📸; CHRISTOF KOEPSEL

[letstalkaboutshtufff]

A Bad Feeling Pt 1

Levi x Reader

Part 1

Paring: Levi Ackerman x Cadet reader

Warnings: 18+ attempted rape/assault, cursing, mention of injury, violence

Summary: Reader feels uncomfortable around a overly friendly captain. Are they just over reacting? Or is there something else going on. What will Levi do when he finds out?

***************************************************

A.n. ok so I literally wrote this in one go, it's probably trash but I wanted to post it anyway. Please lemme know what you think in the comments! Thank you!

"Y/n! captain Oro is asking for you" you did your best to hide the discomfort Armins words made you feel.

You smiled what you hoped was a convincing one and nodded. With a deep breath you made your way to Captains Oro's office.

Ever since you had been introduced to him those few weeks ago, he had taken a special liking to you. At first you had been excited, having such a highly skilled and well known captain take notice of you was one of the best feelings. Especially since your squad leader, Levi wasn't exactly heavy on praise.

Everyone loved Captain Oro, he was known for his strength and stamina on the battle field. He was both charismatic, and charming. Your fellow cadets practically swooned over him. You couldn't help but also get caught up in his perfection. At first that is..

Over time you noticed things about your meetings that put you on edge. An unnecessary shoulder touch here, a too low pat on the back there. Something was off. And although you had done your best to distance yourself from him, it was hard when your squads often had to work together.

But it was hard to say anything against him because even your cold blooded captain seemed to enjoy his presence.

Once you brought it up to your friend Sasha, about how you felt he was being too friendly. But she waved her hand and basically said you were worrying for nothing, he was just a friendly guy. And you were being dramatic.

Maybe you were overreacting? If captain levi approved of him, surely that meant he was a decent person right? Maybe he was just being really really friendly.

You decided to give him a chance and knocked on his door when you finally arrived.

"Come in" a muffled voice came from the other side.

With a click you entered the candlelit room. It was nearing sundown after all.

"Ah cadet y/n! Perfect, I was wondering if I might ask your opinion on something?" He smiled angelically and gestured towards a parchment on his desk.

"Of course sir" you nodded and approached him, reminding yourself of what sasha said. Just relax.

From the way the parchment was positioned you had no choice but to come to his side of the desk.

"Do you see this area here?" He gestured to what you now saw was a map. "What do you think of leading a squad through here instead of what we originally planned?"

The next 30 minutes you spent completely and professionally discussing strategies. Being the member of your squad that was best at this, made him asking for you completely justified. You felt bad for ever doubting his intentions.

"Thank you y/n, I think I have a better idea of what course we should pursue on our next expedition" he smiled sincerely.

"I'm glad I could be of service" you nodded and allowed a relaxed smile to pass your features. Feeling stupid you had judged him so harshly.

" If you wouldnt mind just one more thing?" You nodded as he pulled out a stack of papers.

"If you could look over this report of the last mission before I send it out? See if theres anything else to add?"

"Sure, I'd be happy to Captain" you grabbed the stack.

"And please if you can, return them to me tonight, I'll need them for the meeting bright and early"

"Yes sir, I'll finish it asap, good evening" and with that you exused yourself.

Tonight? It was already sundown. Well whatever, hes so busy he probably doesn't know what time of day it is.

You found a quiet spot amonsgt the crowds in the common room and got to work.

************************************

"Oi brat, it's passed curfew, go to your room now, we have important work tommorow" the unmistakable voice of your captain rang through the now empty hall.

You looked up in surprise and meet his usual scowl, not even realizing how late it had gotten.

"Hai, s-sorry captain, I'll go now" you gathered the report and quickly left, not wanting to receive another scolding for taking too long.

Oh crap you still had to deliever the report. Changing routes you snuck quietly down the familiar hallways. Not particularly feeling like running into Levi again. Something about him always made you act just a little dumber and it was definitely not because of your non existent crush on him...definitely not.. he was just intimidating is all.

*knock knock*

You waited patiently but there was no answer. Crap did he already go to bed? But he knew I was coming? Ugh what should I do? He needs these reports..

With a sigh you change direction again and head for his personal chambers. There was no way you were getting in trouble for not delivering these reports on time.

You smiled when you saw dim light flood from beneath the door.

Lightly you knocked, "Captain Oro, its y/n, sorry it's so late but I have the rep-" you were cut off abruptly when the door swung open and there stood Oro.

Except he looked nothing like the Oro you were used too seeing. His hair was loose from it's normal slicked back do, and the edges were dripping slightly. His shirt was loosely thrown on revealing a decent amount of skin. He must've just bathed.. you could see why the girls were so obsessed with him. He was, platonically speaking, a very gorgeous man.

You were taken aback but reminded yourself that you did knock after hours so of course he wasnt going to be all soldiered up.

"U-um s-sorry Captain, I have the reports" you averted your eyes and shoved the reports in his direction.

"Ah y/n, thank you, would you please put them on my table? My hands are still slightly wet." He laughed holding them up innocently.

"S-sure" god why were you stuttering so much, you fight goddamn titans for a living?! But somehow you were more nervous now than when a 10meter was clawing at you.

You entered the room and tried to avoid looking around too much.

You always wondered what the inside of the higher ups rooms look-

*click*

You whipped around, alarm bells suddenly back in full force.

"Captain what are you-"

"You're such a good girl, you know that y/n?" Oros whole demeanor changed and you cursed yourself for not trusting your earlier instincts.

"U-um" you really did not know what to say or do as he took a couple steps closer.

"Always so obedient for me, I think you deserve a reward don't you?"

Shit

"That's not...that's not necessary captain, I really should be going" you tried to lunge for the door but he was quicker and much much stronger.

"I don't believe I dismissed you cadet..." he purred pinning your arms to the door in the blink of an eye.

You were by no means weak, but your struggles were useless against him.

"Let me go" it took all your strength not to stutter in fear.

"How adorable, you know I love it when you follow my orders so well, but I think..." you shivered in disgust as you felt his lips near your neck and press down.

"I'd like to see you fight me as well" you whimpered as he sucked and bit down on the soft flesh.

"S-stop it, p-please" he smirked and looked into your fearful eyes with his lustful ones. "Stop? But that's not what you really want is it? You see I know exactly how girls like you are" he chuckled darkly and moved one of his hands to grip both your arms, while the other slid lower. You gasped when he cupped your breast. "S-stop! I'll, ill scream If you don't!" You felt a tear slide down your shaking form.

"Scream?" He snickered like you had told the funniest joke.

"Go ahead and scream doll, itll be very interesting to see what happens"

"W-what?" You were utterly confused.

"Think about it, if someone walks in on us, what would they think? Seeing a cadet after hours in her superiors chambers?"

"B-but I! I was bringing the reports i wasn't-!"

"Do you honestly think theyll care what you have to say? Who do you think theyll believe y/n? You a nobody cadet who's been fighting titans for 3 seconds? Or me, a selfless hero whos saved countless of scouts lives? All I have to tell them is that you came into my room and tried to seduce me. When I tried to restrain you, you screamed. Who do you think theyll listen too? Why else would you be here so late at night?"

"Y-You're..you're insane, you're not a hero, y-you're a coward who-" he grasped your jaw harshly causing you to wince.

"I'd watch that mouth of yours y/n" he squeezed harder. I am your superior after all, and we wouldnt want any nasty rumors going around that would have you suspended from the survey corps now would we?" He bent down and to your horror pressed his lips against yours.

Fuck fuck what do I do?!? Hes blackmailing me now. I cant fight him, hes too strong, think think think.

But your mind was blank when his cold lips pressed against your lips again. "Open your mouth" he ordered in a voice laced with animilistac lust.

You abruptly turned your head away desperate to get away.

"Heh, always such a tease" he traced a finger up and down your cheek, flipping over your lips. "I'll enjoy this-"

"CAPTAIN ORO, COMMANDER ERWIN REQUESTS YOUR PRESENCE IN HIS OFFICE IMMEDIATELY" a voice shouts from the other side of the locked door.

With an annoyed sigh, Oro pulls away slightly, "Did he say why?" He lazily looks over in the direction of the door.

"NO SIR!"

"guess it can't be helped... Alright tell him I'll be there shortly" he yelled out.

"Hai" the footsteps recended and you stood deathly still.

He pulled away from you and you immediately pulled your wrists to you, they were an angry red, and it scared you how much strength he had so effortlessly displayed.

"Sorry doll, it looks like we'll have to continue this another night" he stepped away and began dressing normally as if he hadn't just been assaulting you 5 second ago. You quickly make for the door but his voice falters your step, "Oh and y/n?"

You dont look at him, but fear held you in place until he finished, "If you mention our little moment to anyone, you know what will happen" you nodded quickly, anything to appease him and get out.

When the door shut behind you, you felt the flood of tears break through.

D-did, d-did that really happen?!?

You held a hand to quiet your sobs and quickly dashed through the hallways.

You're heart thumped and you felt the need to vomit. You hadn't felt this way since the first time youd encounted a titan. All you wanted to do was get to the safety of your room, just through the hall.

It felt like a bucket of cold water had been thrown on you when a cold voice shouted out and halted your movements. Please not now, oh god any time but now.

"Oi cadet y/n are you deaf as well as dumb? I asked you a question.

"Why are you out past curfew?" he sounded definitely annoyed and you gathered all your strength to hold the sobs out of your voice.

Without turning around you answered, "I-I had to deliver some r-reports..I'll head to my room now.." you stepped forward hoping he would let you go but you were not so lucky.

"Oi brat, did you hit your head? I didn't dismiss you yet. Not to mention you haven't even addressed me properly, maybe some time cleaning up horse shit will remind you how to respect your superiors" fuck he was definitely angry now.

Still you didn't turn around, you couldn't..."S-sorry Captain Levi, I'll do better in the future.." you barely could even focus on the words coming out of your mouth, your heart was beating a mile a minute. Please just leave me alone!

"Hahh" Levi uttered in disbelief and severe annoyance, even the most novice of cadets turn around when being spoken to by a superior. "Are you trying to piss me off brat?!?"

"No sir..." still you didnt turn around, but gulped in fear when you heard sharp footsteps near you.

"Cadet y/n, you have three seconds to turn around and salute me properly before I throw you into the cells for insubordination" he ordered in his dangerously calm voice, that you never thought would be directed at you.

Having no other choice you slowly turn around, hoping to god the darkness of the room would be enough to hide your current state.

You kept your head down, letting your hair fall over your face, but gave a proper salute. Hiding the Wince that came when the tender flesh of your wrist had to bend.

Your eyes were trained on the floor. And you tried to remember how to breathe normally again.

"At least you remember how to-" abruptly his harsh scolding stopped.

Why did he stop?! Fuck did he notice something. No no calm down, he probably just is coming up with another punishment...right?

Wrong...

Levi was far from being done with dicisplining you but he caught sight of your bruised wrist and furrowed his brows immediately. He knew for a fact the last time you spoke in the hall those had not been there. He was quick to take in the rest of your demeanor and knew immediately that the reason you were acting disrespectful was because something was wrong.

"Cadet y/n.." he said suspiciously slow and not full of anger anymore.

"Y-yes?" Please dont ask me, please dont ask me, please dont-

"Look at me"

*******************************

Part 2 here

Okay so that's part 1! Please comment and lemme know what you think🥰also I'm super sensitive so please no hateful comments. Thanks for reading!

[sesskagarchive]

Do you know any sesskag dubcon/rape fics?

Hello anon, thanks for asking.

We decided to compile a list so here are some recommended fics for Dubcon/rape. Some of these even come with Sequels! Happy Reading!

Admin Wicked/k9plus1

DUBCON LIST:

A Curse of Lust by Squash/Fearless miko:

Posted On: Dokuga, FF.net,  Rating: MA Summary: A lusty curse leaves the females in Inuyasha's group running for their lives...and towards their destiny! 

A Mere Digression, by elle6778:

Posted on: Dokuga  Rating: M Summary: A digression was what Sesshoumaru called it. ‘It’ being the heated encounters between him and Kagome which took place simply because neither of them could resist. Heed warnings and notes in the first chapter.

A Woman!, by sugar0o:

Posted On: Dokuga, FF.net , Rating: M Summary: Based somewhat off the idea of Mulan, staring our fav paring Sess/kags, AU, their both demons, because well it makes it easier, and I don’t want to make Sess human, its not right! [lemon w/a plot] this has 2 points, I want to write a lemon to get more comfortable with them, also I want to explore detailing my writing, I will ask that you give serious reviews/critiques, bc I want to learn from this, not just entertain and enthrall. *COMPLETE as of 9/3/9*

Acquisition, Possession, Seduction, by Mistress Sianna: 

Posted On: Dokuga, FF.net Rating: M Summary: “Do not think for one moment that you can escape me.” he said slowly, deliberately. \"You Higurashi Kagome, are mine! Only I will decide if you will stay, if you will go, if you will live or if you will die.\"

Alpha, by Lyra/ lyrainthedark:

Posted On: Dokuga, FF.net Rating: M Summary: Kagome mates Inuyasha...but Inuyasha was reluctant. Why? Pack politics...and his brother, who is Alpha. What that means will take time to learn, if Kagome can only live long enough for the lessons... Finally Complete!

Bound by Corruption, by BelovedStranger/ Two Hearts:

Posted On: Dokuga. AO3, FF.net   Rating: M Summary: Inside every individual, darkness dwelled large or small. A young woman, cast under her elder sister’s shadow, was bent on proving her worth. A terrible threat hung over her village, giving Kagome the opportunity she had been waiting for. On a mission to save them all from the hearts of evil men, she journeyed to the Inu no Kami’s temple to beseech divine intervention. Instead, danger befell the headstrong woman. Rather than obtaining help from a merciful god, another stepped in to slaughter her enemies, but for a price. An Inugami did nothing for free. Status: Completed

Detrimental Desires, by Mistress Sianna:

Posted on: Dokuga  Rating: M Summary: The idea was to make Inuyasha kill Kagome. Little did Naraku know, that on the night of the new moon, Inuyasha looses his demonic powers. Instead, Sesshoumaru and Kagome will be forced to succumb to their most detrimental desires.

Fix It, by Smortz:

Posted On: Dokuga. Rating: M Summary:  When Sesshomaru needs Kagome to help him, she takes advantage of the dog demon now in her debt. As they set out on a new journey, will Kagome be able to overcome the problem that arises? Pun Intended.

He Must be Breeding, by ChaoticReverie:

Posted On: Dokuga  Rating: M Summary: Sesshomaru requires the perfect female to bear his heir, and Kagome… well, she doesn’t know how she gets herself into these messes.

Heated Blood by Imani Joain:

Posted On: Dokuga, FF.net, AO3 Rating: M Summary: Kagome cannot help but try to fix anything she finds broken, even if it is not in her best interest to do so. When she comes across Sesshomaru in dire need of assistance, she cannot deny herself. She only hopes that he won't kill her for it. Rated MA for graphic intimacy. Staus: WIP

House of Ill Repute, by Aurora Antheia Raine:

Posted On: Dokuga, FF.net, AO3 Rating: M Summary:  "I will never be yours." // "But you will be, miko," he nearly purred, "you will be when this Sesshoumaru is finished with you."

Irresistible Temptation, by DestinysTears:

Posted On: Dokuga, FF.net     Rating: M Summary: Sesshomaru finds he cannot ignore this inexplicable temptation. (Oneshot)

Just Another Lemon, by Tiegrsi: 

Posted on: Dokuga Rating: M Summary: Sesshomaru has gone into heat, and finds Kagome willing to put up with his antics. Kagome thinks he was unable to find a suitable woman, and came to her as a last resort. Perhaps there are some things Kagome needs to learn

Lair, Lair, by susie: 

Posted On: Dokuga   Rating: M Summary: After nearly being nearly absorbed, Sesshoumaru's Bakusaiga is forged, and we all know the rest of the story... or do we? In a deal with Sunrise to accelerate the events of TFA, part of the infamous manga was left on the cutting room floor. Though the hack job began well before that. For the sake of public decency, and in accordance with Japan's obscenity laws, the spiciest and most controversial scenes from the original manga were banned from ever seeing the light of day. Until now. On the condition of anonymity, a diligent hacker provided via email a copy of the raw version you were never meant to see. This is Inuyasha Nights – The Lost Chapter *Dubcon

Macaria, by mythicamagic:

Posted on: Dokuga, FF.net, AO3 Rating: M Summary: Post-apocalyptic AU. Human women were all but wiped out when the demons took over. What few remain have gone into hiding or concealed their true gender. When Kagome hears news of an orphaned little girl, she'll stop at nothing to protect her from the dangers of the world- including the city of demons and the infamous Killing Perfection. But is he friend or foe? Status: WIP

Not Impervious, by Oroyukae: 

Posted On: Dokuga   Rating: M Summary: He was supposed to be the most powerful demon in existence; one that none could best in any situation, at any time. That was not entirely accurate, it would seem. One error in judgment at the most vulnerable of times, and all that he knows lay in jeopardy. Just what would said being be willing to agree to in the direst of circumstances? {FIN}

Passion, by CiraArana:

Posted On: Spark, Rating: M Summary: Sesshomaru turned to her and gazed back. He did nothing else, just standing there, looking at her... As he kept his eyes on her, his lust for blood and killing faded away, leaving behind another lust. For her. Status: Abandoned

Poison of Erised!, by Vyncent:

Posted On: Dokuga, Rating: M Summary: Tomorrow night, brother moon would be witness to the music that he heard, and felt in his very soul, as he howled his conquest to his blood red face. Tomorrow his hunger would be fed by the blood and flesh that he hungered for, and the world would know of his claim. Status: Abandoned

Poison Within, by Angelic Memories:

Posted On: Dokuga, FF.net    Rating: MA Summary: *Two-Shot* Due to a nasty bite Kagome is poisoned and fights for her life. Inuyasha can only think of one person who might be able to help her but there’s a problem he didn’t consider.

Secret Possession. By SakuraAngel1:

Posted On: Dokuga Rating: M Summary: Sesshoumaru is forced to put his mating plans into action a lot sooner than expected, and has Kagome kidnapped in order to fulfill it. When Kagome awakens, she finds herself as the new Lady of the Western Lands...with no Lord in sight… Status: Abandoned

Sleeping Beauty, by Catalina:

Posted On: Dokuga Rating: M Summary: Based loosely on the Disney movie, but darker and a bit twisted. Sesshoumaru is betrothed to a little human princess who is delivered a curse by the hanyou Naraku, Kikyo, Miroku, and Kaede agree to raise the child in safety. Smuts in final chapter. Status: Completed

Striking a Deal With the Devil, by Smortz:

Posted On:  Dokuga, FF.net,   Rating: M Summary: Does anything sound funner? Kagome needs help from the new Commissioner. A man that gave 'bad reputation' its standards. However, will Kagome be able to pay the price he demands when a life is on the line? Status: Completed

The Sacrifice, by Catalina:

Posted On: Dokuga   Rating: M Summary: Kagome is lured to a strange village, where she finds herself in an unpleasant situation. She is to be a sacrifice to an as yet unnamed youkai. Semi-non-consensual. Status: Completed

Trapped, Breeder, by sesshou_lover:

Posted on: Dokuga Rating: M Summary: N/A Status: Completed

Virginity of the Soul, by Madison

Posted on: Dokuga, FF.net, AO3 Rating: M Summary: Fresh from a betrayal that shattered her world, she was lured into getting even. Alas, the ones we trust and love aren’t always the ones we should. Semi-PWP. COMPLETE Staus: Complete

The Western Breeding, By Blackthorn:

Posted On: Dokuga, FF.net, Rating: M Summary: The end has come. Demons have found that certain humans can breed pure blooded demon pups. Sesshomaru is leading with Kagome running from the demon lord. Once she is at his side can she learn to love her captor for the sake of her unborn pup or find a way out? Status: Abandoned

RAPE LIST:

Blood Stained, by Madison: 

Posted On: Dokuga, FF.net, AO3  Rating: M Summary: COMPLETE! A sudden loss of control intertwined their fates. It dragged her through hell and he couldn't have cared less. She tried to escape her fears but the only way to do it was to face him through time and love.

Heat of Exchange, by Catalina: 

Posted On: Dokuga Rating: M Summary: It is that time of year for demon women, but Kagome is experiencing something very strange. Sesshoumaru arrives to help her, against her wishes. Freshly beta'd now.

Hell’s Shadows, by Catalina:

Posted On: Dokuga Rating: MA Summary: Formerly named "Ghost of Death" Sesshoumaru lives in hell requiring human women to increase his own power. Kagome falls into his waiting claws, while all of hell is turned upside down by her.DARK. NON CONSENSUAL.

His Wife, by Aries_heart: 

Posted On: Dokuga, FF.net, AO3,    Rating: MA Summary: "With a kiss on her shaking lips, he would leave for work and once the door was closed she would allow herself to cry once more. And then the cycle will repeat."

I Don’t Want a Mate, MLMonty: 

Posted On: Dokuga Rating: M Summary: Sesshoumaru goes into heat during mating season and rapes Kagome. Now she's pregnant and wants nothing to do with him. Should Sesshoumaru respect her wishes and leave her unguarded while she carries his heir?  Status: Abandoned 

Kagome’s Trust, by Fire_and_Earth_Sorceress55/Huntress-of-Flames-55:

Posted On: FF.net, AO3   Rating: M Summary: When Kagome is raped by Sesshomaru on the night of the new moon. Kagome goes home to the future as finds out that she is pregnant with pups? PUPS! Now one year later, she decides to go back to the feudal era.

Paper Cranes, by midori Haru: 

Posted On: FF.net  Rating: M Summary: Meeting, attraction, courting, commitment. For most of the world relationships form in the normal fashion from start to culmination. Naturally normal isn't enough for Sesshoumaru. And he wonders why he runs into problems trying to build a relationship from the wrong end.

Principal Life, by Catalina: 

Posted On: Dokuga Rating: M Summary: Kagome is dating the principal's brother, and he finds out about it. What can an untrained miko hope to accomplish when she is so ignorant of youkai mating traditions? Story is dark and now involves non consensual situations, with more to come. Status: Abandoned

Rise Again, by Catalina: 

Posted on: Dokuga   Rating: M Summary: Youkai have become weak and feeble but are attempting to strengthen their population. Sesshoumaru leads them, and discovers the solution to their problem in an unwilling human. VERY non-consensual stuff happens. Frequently.

S t a s i s, by wonderbug: 

Posted On: Dokuga, AO3  Rating: M Summary: Love, he tells her, as he trails a claw along the pathway of her shivering spine, is only a human notion. [VERY dark; drabble-ish CU/AR]

The Breeder, TexanLady: 

Posted On: Dokuga  Rating: M Summary: There is more to Kagome than anyone could ever imagine. After learning of her destiny Sesshoumaru swears to make her his at any cost. Once forced to his side can Kagome teach him to love or learn to love him. Status: Abandoned

[dontbesoweirdkira]

Can you do a list of Mic being pure w/ his favorite student, (y/n) (like, he’s not afraid to show it), but she’s living with her friend and their family since she’s alone in Japan, and trying to keep it a secret. But when he finds out he’s just “ASDFGHJKLWHAT”, and he’s trying to help her with so many things, which soon evolves to “custody of child—”.

https://dontbesoweirdkira.tumblr.com/post/189518600672/hey-its-me-again-i-hope-you-are-still-open-for

A/N: I first would like to say I ALSO HAVE EATEN A NUCLEAR REACTOR...it tasted like radiation and strawberries yummy!  Here’s your soft present mic X student. I hope you enjoy.  

(I kind of made it where you aren’t fully living with your friend. Just bouncing from the streets to her house every so often if that makes sense??)Requests open

-So at first Mic didn’t notice anything was up...well no he did but he kind of brushed it off since he didn’t want to cross any boundaries.

-Like when he asked for your parents signature but they were always somehow “out of town” or “working overtime” 

-Or when he was going to offer you a ride home since it was pretty late but you just insisted to walk by yourself. And how you didn’t bother to call them and let them know you were going to be home a bit later than usual. 

-He was always curious but like i said he didn’t want to cross a boundary and make you feel uncomfortable about something so personal. Besides how would he bring it up?

-”Hey Y/N, Why do you always conveniently “forget” to fill out your home address on forms?” 

-Yeah see his dilemma?^ And like what if it was nothing and it really was just a convenience.  It seemed better to leave it alone and not worry. You’d tell him if something was going on, right?

-Maybe one day you’re talking to your friend and He’s just around the corner so he overhears the conversation.

-”Hey Y/N, my family is going out of town for a few weeks. I- i would ask if you could come with so you’ll have some place to stay but we are going out of the county and you know how that is..”

-”Oh..um..Don’t worry, I'll figure something out.”

-”Are you sure? I- i can always leave the house key so you can have somewhere safe to go? But uhm, My cousin might come over every so often to watch a game or to check the house so be alert and make sure he doesn’t see you.” 

-”N-No it’s okay, seriously. I’ll find somewhere to go, thank you though. ”

-”Well, I'll leave the key under the doormat if you change your mind, we’re leaving in the afternoon tomorrow so after then the place will be yours for a bit.I’ll text you later, ‘kay?”

-He’s shocked?? Like he thought maybe your at home life wasn’t good or maybe you were embarrassed about living in a low income place, but you were homeless?? And you’ve been staying with your friends every so often?? Why didn’t you tell him? Did you not feel comfortable? He’s in this weird state of shock and acknowledgement.

-For the rest of the school day hE Is cOnTemPlaTiNg oN WhaT tO Do. He’s not sure how he should bring it up or even if he should bring it up. 

- *is casually being torn apart internally as he’s trying to teach english*

-*dEeP sPaCe STarE while he is standing at the board pointing to the sentence structures*

-”Sensei, are you oka-”

-”IMTHINKINGASHARDASICANTOFIGUREOUTASOLUTIONDONTPRESSUREMEoKaY.”

-lolol but once classes are over he taps you on the shoulder and asks if he could walk with you home for a bit. You visibly nervous, you reject and say “Umm It’s all right Mr.Hizashi, you’re busy and I don't want you to take up any of your time plus it’s late and I'm tired and i have to go and-”

-”Y/n...You don’t have to make up excuses, I know you don’t have anywhere to stay.”

-stopping in your tracks, your eyes went wide and you faced him 

-”I heard you talking to that friend this morning.”

-M-mr.Hizashi I can explain-”

-cutting you off once again he begins “Hey, you don’t have to do any of that. It’s your business. But I don’t want you to just roaming around or staying anywhere alone anymore, okay? If you would like, I have an extra bedroom at my house, you can stay there until we get everything sorted.”

-”No..Mr.Hizashi...It’s okay..I’ll be okay, I’ve always have. Plus you have been such a great teacher and already went out of your way more than what I could have asked...staying with you would be too much.”

-”Y/n, it’s okay to ask for help. I seriously don’t mind. At least stay for the night so you can eat and have a roof over your head, then in the morning we’ll figure something out.”

-You hesitantly accepted but you told him that you’d be out of his hair as soon as the next morning hit.

-That night going to his house was...nice to say the least. The guest bedroom that he had was bigger than your friend’s kitchen and nicer than any place that you’ve stayed at. It really was heaven. So warm and cosy. There was a nice sense of nostalgia and security, something you’ve haven’t felt in years. His home was somewhere anyone would want to live in their whole lives. 

-”Once you’ve settled down, you can come to the dining room. I ordered some take out, I figured you’d be hungry.”

-For a moment you sat on the fluffy bed and just took in everything. God was so good to you right now and honestly you thanked him. Although it frustrates you to think that this would only last for a second and you’d be back on the streets, roaming around. Yeah yeah, Hizashi wants to help you but you knew soon he’d get tired of your presence in his house…..they all did. 

-Taking a deep breath, you went to go meet hizashi in the dining room.

-He welcomed you then motioned you to sit down at any of the seats at the table. “Oh hey, there’s miss america. You may sit anywhere you’d like. And help yourself to the food here.”

-You sat down across from him, only not to look at him just to have your eyes on the empty plate in front of you. You didn’t really touch any of the food actually or even make a sound. You weren’t trying to be rude or anything, you just..there was a lot on your mind and facing hizashi seemed difficult.

-”Are you okay Y/N? I hope sushi is okay. I- i meant to um ask what you would like to eat first. I’m sorry.”

-”No I’m sorry for-,”  twiddling your thumbs for a moment you then looked towards the blonde fellow “Mr.Hizashi..My parents left when I was around three but they left me with my aunt. She was a very good person and took good care of me but she got very ill...and um you know. At first I was living in her apartment but i couldn’t pay for it when it was time for rent so..I stayed with my friend for a couple of months. But her parents kind of got tired of me staying there and it was this thing, so I lied and told them I found a family member to stay with. And um up until now I've been staying on the streets. Sometimes having a sleepover once every so often.”

-”Y/n…”

-”I didn’t tell you because I was so scared… I didn't know what to do and I really really don’t want to go in foster care or anything so I just thought I was better off keeping it from you. But I guess it backfired anyways because you still found out haha….I’m sorry Hizashi. I hope you don’t think of me any less. I- it was a tough situation and all and you know how that is...”

-He immeadately stood up, walked over to you and hugged you. It was with So mUcH compassion and genuine love. You really was his favorite student no scratch that HIS FAVORITE HUMAN i swear he would end the world for you. 

-He gave you a little cheek kiss and was like “I’m not letting anyone put you in foster care and I'm sure as hell am not kicking you out even if i have to take custody of you.”

-”w-wait what? wAiT wHaT???”

-”KID IM fucking keeping you here safe with me even if i’m in court all year. We are going to make this work somehow, you aren’t doing this alone anymore. Do you understand?”

-YeAh hEs cRyInG iM cRyinG yOuRe CryInG wE aLl CryinG 

-BRO YOU ARE UGLY CRYING NOT NO SOFT CUTE CRY LIKE HAHA YOU SOUND LIKE A WALRUS TRYING TO SAY ‘t-tH-Th-HaNKy-yyy-YoUUU-UOi  mR hIzZaShIiIi”

-He whipes the tears of your cheeks and ruffles your hair 

-”it’ll be okay Y/N, I promise.”

-I swear he’s like rushing to the computer and trying to figure out how to adopt you.

-”HoW tO aDoPt a ChILD wHen You aRe a hEro.”

-There's an actual wiki-how about it???????

-No but he’s really doing his research and is visiting lawyers trying to find the right one. He has them immediately looking into everything and making sure that his chances of getting you is as high as possible. 

-He’s up late at night on the phone, emailing,  and writing

-He has pounds and pounds of evidence that he is the most fit person to take care of you. He is not playing whatsoever

-He already let’s you decorate and he even gives you an office so you can do work or whatever. He most definitely brought you clothes and stuff for your room.

-When the courts and everything finally approves it after a long year of fighting, he picked you up and spun you around.

-”What did I tell you?!? I was not going to lose you and i made sure of that. And starting today and the rest of  forever you’ll never have to be alone.”

-BonUs

-100% takes you out somewhere super fun and nice. 

-”Wait we must take a selfie, The first day we are legally Father-daughter!”

-The most chaotic duo now, Everyone at school knows he adopted you and like he won't let anyone forget it.

-MISSSSSS AMERICAAAAAAA, is now, MISSSSSSS HIZAAAAASSSHHHHHIIIIIIII.

-”WHEEEEERRREEEE ISSS MYYYY LITTLE MUSHROOM???”

-”YYYYYY/NNNNN YOU LEFT YOUR BAG IN MY MINIVAN.”

-He has a minivan now. It also has a ‘Yeah I’m a soccer dad and i’m proud’ sticker on it.

-He joined the PTA 

-HE IS SOOO BIASED I SWEAR NO ONE IS ABOVE YOU IN HIS CLASS AND NO ONE BETTER SAY ANYTHING ABOUT IT

-Always hugging you and giving you little cheek kisses when he sees you in the halls

-Made a titled track called “Now a dad”

-he most definitely wears ‘Best Dad’ shirts now. He also is in a ‘Single dad’s in Japan’ group now

-”I think we look just alike, Don’t we Y/N?” you both smiled and posed at the same time

[cottage-babe]

Bolin x pro-bender!Reader

Masterlist

here... take this bolin headcannon... just take it

i feel like there’s not nearly enough bolin stuff and since i’m almost finished w LOK, i guess ill aid this deficiency :)

also, i just started Book 3, so if theres some things that aren’t right or something, ignore it 

___

Bolin HC (during Book 1/Book 2)

so you guys met at (you guessed it) a pro-bending match

you were an Earthbender for the Ba Sing Se Badgermoles, a widely known team because you guys represented such a big city and you guys were actually kinda good

the Badgermoles were constantly interviewed, put on the covers of magazines, and bombarded by fans. The people loved you and your team

and so the day came where the Badgermoles were put up against the Fire Ferrets

you had heard about this team a lot; how they lost a member of the team, then the Avatar, actual master of the elements, filled in that empty space

it honestly took you so long to process

anyways, your team didn’t get the chance to meet the Fire Ferrets before the match; you just threw on all of your gear and made your way to the play area

you saw the Ferrets and instantly saw Avatar Korra, the only girl on the team

honestly, you couldnt see her well, but she was so pretty

anyways

the battle started and the Badgermoles got the advantage pretty quick

you took out their firebender and was working on the earthbender while the rest of team handled the Avatar

the earthbender put up a huge fight, it was so impressive

he even knocked you back a zone, but you recovered and, with a streak of luck, knocked him straight out of the field

you guys won that round

the next round didn’t go so well

the fire ferrets managed to knock all three of you guys off the platform, resulting in a win and a knock out

this meant that the entire match went to the Fire Ferrets

the other members on your team were annoyed and angry, but you weren’t phased too much

after all, Ba Sing Se treated you all extremely nicely, whether you win or not

so after the game, your team found themselves walking through the Fire Ferret’s locker room so you could leave

after your team mates walked past, you stayed behind and talked to one of the Ferrets, the Earthbender

“Hey, you were really good out there.”

you took off your helmet, just like in the movies, and he swore time slowed

he just stood there, completely frozen with his mouth agape

you raised an eyebrow at his antics and it wasn’t until Avatar Korra slapped him on the back that he came back to

“You- good- were good, uh im- im Bolin.”

you just laughed at Bolin and smiled 

“My names Y/n”

you walked up close to him, noses inches apart

“And next time, we won’t lose.”

he just gulped and nodded him head

you turned and walked out, laughing quietly to yourself

the interaction boosted your mood up exponentially

anyways timeskip to when their looking for the airbenders

you were just chilling in Ba Sing Se in the upper ring

you and your team were given super nice houses since you were the city’s pride and joys

then suddenly, you see Bolin and his brother walking around calling for someone

“Bolin? is that you?”

that boy turned around so fast

he blushed so brightly when he saw you and kinda looked at his brother for help

“well, well, what are the Fire Ferrets doing in my city? you know.. i’ve been dying for a rematch!”

you were only joking of course

you knew that their team had broken up after the year you met Bolin

not that you were keeping tabs on their team

of course

“yeah not right now, we’re looking for someone” his brother said

“oh? need some help?”

it took some time to convince Mako, the brother, but eventually you annoyed him enough to let you join

you were all walking through the upper ring looking for some kid named Kai, but you weren’t really paying attention

you maybe, kinda, might only be there so you could hang out with Bolin

from what you had heard (once again, you definitely weren’t searching for info), Bolin was an outgoing, loud guy

now he was quieter than a mouse

“So, i heard you were making movers now. What, getting tired of being a Pro-Bender?”

“Huh? No. I still play! I’m just doing this until the season starts...”

you were visibly happier after hearing that

you had thought that acting was going to be his permanent thing from now on

but still one thing plagued your mind

“And whats that princess girlfriend of yours gonna think about it? Ginger, I think her name was.”

Spirits you had done wayyyy too much research on this man

to be fair, you didn’t think you’d see him ever again

he blushed and stuttered out something about how they weren’t really dating, how it was a publicity stunt, blah blah

you weren’t really paying attention because after hearing his availability, you decided that today was the day you were gonna make a move on him

if it fails, then you don’t really have much to worry about; he lives in an entirely different city and you would only have to see him once a year

but if it succeeds; ohohohoh you’d finally get to live out your crush

the pros really outweighed the cons right now

so you guys searched for Kai for a while more

you decided that you were going to make some subtle hints toward Bolin

you let your hand brush against his a couple times, but never really looked up to see his reaction

then, you guys found Kai

he was stealing some old guy’s money by... airbending? why does this day just keep getting weirder?

so you guys chase him down an the streets and eventually follow him onto a train

unfortunately, he tricks you and sends you guys all the way to the lower ring 

you used to live here when you were younger, before you became a Pro-Bender, and it wasn’t a nice place

only now, it seemed to have gotten worse

all of you tried to find a way to get on a train back to the upper ring, but none of you had your passports or any money

if only you hadn’t left your house in such a hurry

you even tried to pull the “im a Pro-Bender!” card, but it didnt work

so you guys stayed on the streets for the day

Bolin was really trying to lighten the situation up, but it wasn’t really working 

“C’mon guys! Korra will realize that we’re gone and then come rescue us! I know it!”

she did not come

eventually, they had to find a place to sleep and no where was letting the stay for free

so they found a place in an alley and slept on the floor

yup, the dirty floor

you were not used to this

you almost wanted to stay up for the whole night to avoid sleeping on the ground, but Bolin assured her that it wasn’t as bad as it seemed

it was

“mmm here! you can use my jacket.”

he took off his jacket and laied it out on the floor neatly before gesturing for you to lay there

you hesitated for a second before sitting, not really putting up much of a fight because of how tired you were

Mako was already asleep somewhere across the alley and Bolin began gathering up some papers to use as blanket

then he found a spot somewhere away from you and started to settle down

“hey Bolin? do you maybe wanna share the jacket?”

he looked up so quickly and even the soft light from the lamp post caught his blush

“uhh sure”

and so he came over and laid halfway on the jacket so that you could take up most of it

he even offered you some of his picked up trash to use as a blanket, but you grimaced at the grossness and shook your head

you turned away from him, not wanting to be too overwhelmed by his proximity, so you didn’t notice that Bolin was staring at you

before you could completely fall asleep, a cool breeze burst threw the alley way and you began to shiver

maybe you should’ve accepted his paper

“hey Y/n you awake?”

since you were currently bouncing between consciousness, you decided not to answer

you feel him scoot closer

“okay please dont be mad at me when you wake up”

then you felt his arm cover your cold skin and warm you instantly

Spirits, he should be a firebender with how warm he was

you scooted back to meet his chest and let him envelope you

you fell asleep so quick

both of you woke up to Mako above you speaking loudly

“hey lovebirds, wake up”

since you already know of the position you were in, you didn’t really jump back with the surprise that Bolin had

“S-Sorry Y/n! You just looked so cold last night that I-” 

“its fine Bolin” you smiled at him “and thank you”

spirits he was so cute

and so you guys went on with the day, thinking about stealing food, then meeting their long lost family

it was such a nice reunion

they talked a bit about their family history, but since you felt out of place, you settled for playing with the babies on the floor

you bended little toys out of rocks and watched as some tried the same

it was so cute

meanwhile, Bolin was having a little dilemma

he and Mako had just finished having a heartfelt conversation with his Grandma and now he walks out here to see you playing with little babies and laughing with them

you were just so cute

“you know she likes you too right?”

“huh?! what- staring? im not staring.”

Mako just sighed because wow his baby brother is so dumb

“just talk to her before we leave Ba Sing Se”

and so they got their passports and left to the Upper Ring

you were so excited to go back home and sleep in a real bed

but you had one more thing to do before all of that

“So uh Bolin”

“So uh Y/n”

you guys spoke at the same time

“Oh! you can go first”

once again at the same time

“listen Y/n, I think you’re really pretty and super strong, like you could beat me up if you wanted to and i think thats really cool.” *cue your confused stare* “um anyways what I meant to say was, I think I’m about to fight the queen of Ba Sing Se and if I make it out alive, do you think we could hang out? like just us two?”

you decided to ignore some parts of what he said because umm you can only handle so many things at once

you settled for kissing his cheek and confessing too

you went back home so excited

even tho your crush was about to commit treason <3

aww the two of you are so cute I can’t

[ivyuns]

come back to me again ❆ ✰

kim seungmin

genre: angst, fluff

word count: 1.8k

warnings: 2018-2020 era, young hearts are broken, mentions of passing out, y/n’s leader name is yerim and other member’s name is sunni, mentions of suicide, fainting, mean comments, strict dieting, one bad word oop, the plot doesnt make sense lol i just wanted a break from landing in your heart, not proofread

notes: i had three story plots i wanted to use but uh yeah i chose this one (maybe ill post all three of them but different members oo) but listen to love again by baekyun, or the cover by minnie <3

masterlist

idol!seungmin x femidol!reader

tell me you love me like the day you did

the day it ended was on a rainy, cold day. seungmin called you to meet up with him, saying he had something to tell you. heading to the jyp building, which wasnt that far from you house.

scanning your id and greeting the staff, you go to the room seungmin was in. knocking twice, you heard a “come in” and opened the door gently. “hi minnie” you smiled at your boyfriend. seungmin waved back with a small smile on his face.

“y/n, come sit here, we need to talk”

going to where seungmin pat the spot for you to sit, he sighs. “i know this is hard, but you know how stray kids is debuting soon?” you nod, knowing where this is leading to. “i- we have to break up” he paused. “but you know i love you right? i promise id come back after three years okay baby?” holding you tears, you looked into his eyes, that are full of sadness.

trying your best to hold your tears in, you gave him one last hug. before parting different ways, seungmin kissed your lips. letting go, you put the promise ring he gave you 2 years ago on his palm and walked away. letting the tears running onto your cheeks as you walked away from the room.

with a sobbing seungmin left alone in the practice room. holding your promise ring made him feel guilty, but it wasnt his fault that he had to do this.

tell me once again, say that you love me again

packing all of seungmins stuff that was at your house and looking though them made your heart burn. from they day he asked you out after school to whenever you two last hung out with each other, which was over 2 months ago.

because now that you and seungmin auditioned to be in the same company, but with seungmin, he had a little bit more talent than you did. it didnt mean you didnt have talent, it just meant you were physically ready to become an idol. still improving, many idols were amazed at how well your singing and dancing was.

finally taping seungmins box, you went to the stray kids dorm and dropped it off and to say goodbye to the boys. deciding to switch to a new company to focus more instead of dealing with you heartbreak.

you rung the doorbell and you come face-to-face with seungmin. handing seungmin the box, you asked if it was okay to say goodbye to the boys, which made seungmin confused. where you going somewhere? ending your dreams?

seungmin moved to the side for you to come in. as seungmin closed the door, a voice was heard. “seungmo! who’s here- oh” looking up, you see minho. your eyes that was red and puffy ran more tears down as you ran up and hugged minho.

minho was in fact the one who introduced you to seungmin. accidentally falling in love with seungmin, you told minho all about it and he eventually told seungmin about your feelings towards him. seungmin, who felt the same way, made the best way to confess to you, which was a success.

minho hugged you back, caressing you back as seungmin looked down and went back to his room. “its okay love, its okay” minho shushed you as you cried into his chest. settling you two in the living room, the whole stray kids but seungmin came out of their rooms, comforting you as they all knew what happened between you and seungmin.

30 minutes passed and you decided it was time to go. giving the boys one last hug, you made sure they’ll have good luck when theyre now idols.

“just know, ill love you guys forever. thank you”

im where ive always been, i still love you

almost 2 years had gone by and you finally debuted into a three member group. with being the main vocalist and dancer. being invited to the award shows, your group gracefully posed on the red carpet, right after stray kids. accidentally locking eyes with seungmin, you almost teared up but you had to be strong.

sitting down in front of stray kids, you grew anxious as if nobody else other than stray kids and yerim knew about your past relationship. stilling having feelings for seungmin, you let them go and paid attention to the show that was now starting.

“hyung, dont you think y/n looks like shes about to pass out?” jeongin asked seungmin. after you left the dorms that day, seungmin didnt know where you were. nobody told him anything about you other than you leaving jyp. you and your group was hidden from social media until your company announced a new girl group was debuting soon.

after seungmin got the news about you, he felt so relieved, knowing that you were still here living. on the pictures online, you looked like a goddess. the way your singing was beautiful and your dancing were sharp. he was amazed at how far you came.

but when seungmin saw you in person, it looked like you were on the verge of passing out due to how thin you looked. it looked like you couldnt perform on what your condition is.

feeling unsteady, your group was the last ones to perform. getting into your costumes, you fell back slightly when yerim pushed you up. after seeing how weak your body has been acting, she was worried something might happen to you on stage. and seeing how you reacted when you saw seungmin again made her worried.

“y/n, are you sure you got this?” yerim asked. nodding your head a yes with a smile on you, you gave her a thumbs up. with the smile that hid everything. yerim nodded her head, your group was ready to perform.

among the three girls that was on the stage, seungmin only looked out for you. anxiety rising, seungmin bit his lips which changbin rubbing his back to calm down.

the end of the performance, you tried your best to stay still, but you only saw blurry vision. as you were about to get off stage, you fainted with your head hitting the floor first. gasping were loud from everyone as yerim and sunni tried to lift you up and go back to the dressing rooms.

as soon as seungmin saw everything, he stood up and tried to run towards you till he was stopped by chan. “seungmin you cant. everyone’s going to find out” “i dont care hyung, the person i love the most is hurt” seungmin said and let go of chan’s hand that was gripped around seungmins wrist.

seungmin runs through the halls and tries to find your groups room. after finding it, he gently pushes away people who are near you and gets a view of you on the couch. “s-seungmin” both sunni and yerim said together. “yerim, what happened to her” seungmin asked, skipping the honorifics since they know each other.

yerim bites her lips with glossy eyes, scared of what to tell seungmin what you’ve been doing. “yerim?! i said whats going on with y/n-” “she tried to kill herself!” seungmin pauses and tries to lets what yerim said sink into him.

“w-what? why?” seungmin asks as tears start streaming down his face, as well as sunni’s and yerim’s. “she was scared. scared that she wasnt going to be perfect to be an idol. she started getting hate comments, saying she was too fat. but this is why shes too thin. she wont listen to us when we tell her she needs to rest and to start eating. all she does is practice with no water breaks but somehow, she still hits every move right. other than that, shes scared of what youll see her like again. she still loves you seungmin, but shes scared”

“sunbae, shes not okay. she needs somebody and that somebody is you”

seungmin was stunned by what yerim and sunni told him. “can- can you two leave us for a moment. please?” seungmin asked quietly as everyone left the room. seungmin starred at your body. eyes closed with you as skinny as your bones. it scared him of how you thought so low about yourself.

he doesnt understand it. he doesnt understand how you got every moves and vocals right without anything. where you like this during your relationship? no, it couldnt. both seungmin and you promised each other that you two will never keep secrets to yourself.

seungmin silently cries to himself, thinking of why you wanted to do this to yourself as he held your hand. his tears slowly fall onto you forearms, which wipes the makeup off of your scars you created, which makes seungmin cry more.

because of you fainting, the award show was paused temporally. with this being said, stray kids got up and quickly went to you room until they were stopped by yerim. “dont, seungmins already in there” all of them nods their heads and waited outside the room with minho dropping down, hands in his face with tears as he remembers when you tried to seek help from him but he never answered because he was too busy.

don't leave me alone baby, just stay for the night baby

still holding your hand, seungmin whispers ‘i love yous’ and ‘im sorry, please forgive me’. gaining conscious, you flutter your eyes open and see seungmin in front of you.

“seungmin?”

he opens his eyes to see you awake. “bab- y/n. thank god” seungmin says and hugs you gently. tears start streaming down as you realized he probably knows everything now. “s-seungmin, did they tell you-” “yes they did. and im sorry. so fucking sorry oh my god, please dont do this again. please eat, please do what you loved to do again. i want the old y/n back, the happy one” seungmin lets out.

“okay, ill come back” you told him. seungmin wipes your tears away, as well as his and plants a kiss on your lips. “come back to me again?” nodding your head, you both smile. this time, a real and happy smile from you.

the awards continued on and your group won an award. chan offered your group if they wanted to come for dinner, you were going to decline, but yerim, sunni and seungmin forced you to, wanting you to start eating again.

heading out, the eleven of you walked to the nearest korean bbq while holding seungmin’s hand. feeling the warmth youve been missing for 2 years.

tell me your love again.

END <3

[bittywitches]

hi bby! hope you're having a great day! for the prompt list, can I have #2 and #35 for grayson? tysm!!!

You’re the sweetest 🥺 As usual I got carried away, but I hope I did alright 😅 Hope you’re doing well too!

#2: “Stay here tonight.” & #35: “You make me feel safe.”

You woke up in a cold sweat, panting in the darkness of your bedroom. Your chest was pounding, the dark only adding to your tension. You scrambled to turn your table lamp on, sighing finally when you could see the warm colour wash over your room. 

Just another nightmare.

You breathed out, rubbing your face to try and ease your tension. The past few weeks had been rough on you. Ever since your mother grew ill, it was like everything else in your life started to spiral out of control. You had to take a few days off from work to take care of your mom, that taking up most of your days now. You knew she’d probably get by on her own, but you knew her. She wasn’t one to work well alone. Your mother had raised you all on her own, but you hadn’t left her side until just last year, when you’d moved out to live in a small apartment that was a lot closer to your job. Things were okay since your younger sister had been living with her up until a few months ago, when she left the state for school. Now it was just her at home, by herself. And once she got sick, she became even more restless, and you didn’t want to leave her alone. You loved her, but taking care of her everyday was adding a lot to your stress. You were afraid if you took any more days off you might lose your job, but leaving your mom alone at her house scared you to no end. That of course was all it took to fuel your ongoing nightmares. 

You sighed, reaching for your phone, knowing that there was no way you’d be able to fall asleep now after getting spooked like that again.

The light hurt your eyes a bit, but eventually you adjusted to it, seeing that it was 1 in the morning. You opened up instagram and scrolled through the posts, but stopped when you saw what Grayson had posted. It was a picture of you from yesterday when you had crashed at the twins’ place after leaving your mom’s house, since it was closer. You were sitting on the sofa, curled up into a ball while draped in a huge fuzzy blanket. The picture was taken from your side, and you remembered Grayson taking that photo of you in the middle of the movie you were watching. You swiped to see a photo of you now looking directly at the camera, tears in your eyes as you gripped the edge of the blanket close to your face. You blushed at that, embarassed that he’d decided to post it. You swiped one more time to see a photo of TV screen displaying a scene from Love Actually. You looked down to see the caption:

graysondolan I had to hug her until she stopped crying 😅

You smiled at that. He was right, but it’s not like he did it against his will. After the movie finished he brought you both a bowl of ice cream and you guys cuddled under the blanket while you watched The Office reruns to help you cool down. 

You loved the twins, they were some of your closest friends, and you were so grateful to have them, especially during this stressful time right now. They could help you relax, wind down, and wouldn’t let you feel bad for it. You’d found, however, that these past few months, you and Grayson had been growing a lot closer. 

Closer how? That was a good question. You yourself were trying to figure that out. You weren’t going to pretend that you didn’t have a small crush on Grayson, but you knew that right now it didn’t really matter if you did or not. You had so much going on in your life, you wouldn’t be able to get into something like that. Sure, spending all that time with him was always amazing, usually the highlight of your week. And as times got tougher, the nightmares seemed to keep finding you each night, and each time you found yourself soothing yourself back to sleep by thinking of being held in a certain someone’s arms... but that didn’t mean he liked you in the way you did him. You knew not to get your hopes up.

You shook your head, going to turn off your lamp again. You flopped down onto your mattress, closing your eyes to try and force yourself back to sleep.

…

…

…

Y/N!

No, no, come back!

HELP ME!

No, PLEASE-

You shot up, your chest heaving like crazy. 

“God, why-” You turned your lamp on again, rubbing your eyes.

“Guess I’m not sleeping tonight.” You grumbled, getting out of bed and pulling on your fuzzy slippers. You quickly tied up your hair into a loose ponytail, then grabbed your phone as you headed for your living room. 

You plopped yourself down onto your couch. You sighed, turning your phone on again to be introduced with Grayson’s post again. Your eyes drifted down the screen, but widened when you saw something. He’d only posted it about a half hour ago.

That meant he was still awake. 

You sat there for a while, contemplating what to do. You really did want to see him, but could you really do anything about it, considering what time it was?

You bit your lip. Fuck it. You pressed Grayson’s contact, then pressed call. 

You held the phone up to your ear, breathing in slowly as it rang.

“Y/N?” His voice sounded a lot clearer than you expected, so you could tell that he’d been awake.

“Hey.” 

“Are you okay? Why are you up?” You could already hear the concern in his voice.

“Um…”

“Is your mom okay?” 

“Yea, nothing’s wrong, don’t worry.” You smiled still.

“Oh.. okay, good.” He cleared his throat. “Why aren’t you asleep?” he asked again.

“I… couldn’t sleep. Wanted to talk to someone.” You started to get nervous when he didn’t respond right away. “You know what, I probably shouldn't have even called-”

“No, no, it’s okay. I was actually just editing a video right now, anyways.”

“Oh, am I disturbing? I’m sorry-”

“Y/N,” He laughed over the phone. “It’s all good. I was just finishing up anyway.”

You chuckled. “Okay.”

“You okay?” Even though you’d said otherwise, Grayson could tell there wasn’t something going on.

“Yea… just.. Got up to make tea.” you decided, then got off the couch and went to your kitchen in search of tea bags.

“You usually have midnight tea breaks?” He laughed again.

“Haha, no. Just today.” You turned the kettle on, then turned around to lean your back against the cool counter.

“Hey, um.” You cleared your throat. “Are you busy right now?”

“Not really, no. Why?”

“Okay, um, this might sound a bit crazy, but…” You rubbed your shoulder. “Do you wanna maybe come over?”

There was a pause. “...Right now?”

“Y-yea.”

“...Did you drink?”

“W- Grayson!” Your face flushed.

“Okay, so no-”

“You know what nevermind I’m sorry I called-”

“No no stop. M’sorry. I’d love to come over. Don’t you think it’s a bit late though..?”

“Just for a little bit.” You felt like you were begging at this point, but you didn’t care. You wanted to see him. “You don’t have to stay long.”

You bit down on your lower lip. “But you’re right, it’s fine-”

“Y/N, no. I’ll be there in twenty.” 

You smiled. “Okay. Bye.”

“Bye.”

.  .  .

Almost exactly twenty minutes later, you heard the ringing of the doorbell. You gently placed your hot cup of tea down on the coffee table, and scurried towards the door.

“I’m coming!” You said, reaching the doorknob and turning it.

You opened the door to find Grayson standing there, his long hair set free from his usual bandana, wearing a loose black tshirt and a pair of grey sweatpants. He had a big grin on his face.

You smiled. “Hi-” But then your eyes drifted down to see him holding a cute little teddy bear and a take-out ihop bag; your comfort food.

“Grayson..” You brought your hands up to cover your mouth, suddenly finding tears spilling over your face, and you didn’t even know why. You’d been trying to keep your emotions at bay for so long that this one kind gesture was enough to tip you over the edge.

“Hey hey hey, hold on,” He placed the bag on the floor and reached for you, wrapping his arms around you. You buried your head into his neck as he rubbed your back.

“Y/N.”

“Mhm?” You sniffled, fiddling with his chain.

“Are you okay?” he asked one final time.

You breathed out. “No.”

He sighed. “I had a hunch.” He gently took your shoulders and pushed you away from him. “Wanna go eat this stuff?”

“Maybe later…” You said, wiping your eyes and bending down to take the bag. “I’ll put it in the fridge.”

You hugged him again, pressing your cheek against his chest. “Thank you.”

“Nothing to thank me for.” You smiled at him. He slipped his shoes off, then walked past you into your living room, and you closed the door behind him. 

“Oh, I made you tea.” You pointed at the second cup on the coffee table. 

“Thanks.”

You nodded, going over to the fridge to put the food away. You made you way over to Grayson and sat down next to him on the sofa. You watched him for a bit as he drank his tea.

Finally he set his cup down. “Okay, what’s going on? Is everything seriously okay with your mom?”

“Yes, she’s fine. At least, not worse than normal.”

“Then what’s going on? Why’d you call me?” He placed his hand on your leg, gently rubbing his thumb over your knee.

“I…” You coughed. “I’ve been having nightmares.” 

He tilted his head at you, a concerned look on his face. “Is it because of your mom?”

“I-I think it’s part of it.” You looked away, embarrassed. “I know it’s stupid-”

“Y/N it’s not stupid. It makes sense. You’ve got a lot on your plate right now.”

You looked up at him. “Yea?”

“Yea.” He paused. “Is that why you called? Because your nightmares wouldn’t let you sleep?”

You nodded, and you could see the actual pain in his face when you did that.

“Y/N…” He wrapped his arms around you again, and this time you let yourself comfortably nestle into his side. He kissed your forehead as he rubbed your shoulder.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but… are the nightmares actually about your mom?”

“That’s the thing, I don’t even know.” He brushed a hair out of your face as you spoke. “Every time it’s always me losing somebody; sometimes it’s my mom, or my sister, or a friend, sometimes it’s just a weird looming entity that doesn’t have a face but.. It still hurts. Still scares me.” You looked up at him, but found that his eyes were already on you.

“Sometimes…” You continued, fiddling with the edge of his t-shirt. “Sometimes it’s you.”

His eyes widened when you said that. “Oh.” He sat there for a moment, thinking about what you’d told him. He turned to face you directly, you now lying on his left arm while his other one came up to wrap around your waist. “Well at least I can relieve you of one worry.” He bent down to kiss your forehead again. “You’ll never lose me.”

You smiled, leaning back into him so you could nestle into his chest and neck, and he rested his head above yours. You both stayed like that for a while, not speaking, but just enjoying the closeness of one another.

“Hey, Y/N?” Grayson finally said, kissing the top of your head to see if you were still awake.

“Mmm?” You mumbled.

“Why’d you call me?”

You looked up at him, brows furrowed. “Hm?”

“I mean- I know why you called me. But why did you call me? Why not someone else?”

“Because…” You faltered.

“Not that I’m not happy you did.” He smiled. “I am. I just.. Dunno. Wouldn’t you call one of your girlfriends for something like this?”

“I guess…” You sighed. “But I wanted to see you.” His eyes seemed to twinkle when you said that. “You… You make me feel safe.”

“I do?”

“Yea. Like, no matter how fucked up everything else in the world is right now, you make me feel like it’s gonna be okay. That I’m gonna be okay.”

He grinned so wide at that, and it made you blush. “That was really cheesy, wasn’t it?”

“No. It was great.” He brought his arm up from your waist to gently caress your cheek with his knuckle. “That means so much to me. Thank you.”

You didn’t know what to think. Here he was, just him and you, snuggled up together at who knows when in the morning. It was perfect. 

But of course, it wasn’t.

You thought about just how bad this situation was. You were falling for this boy, who you didn’t even know if he shared the same feelings as you did. You’d called him in the middle of the night to come over, and for what? You couldn’t get into anything right now. That would be too hard with everything going on. 

But somehow not letting him know was even harder.

You laughed, rubbing your eyes gently.

“What is it?” Grayson asked.

“Oh, I just-” You looked at him again, his hazel eyes connecting with yours sending that wonderful feeling through your body. “It’s nothing.”

“C’mon, tell me.”

You sighed, a smile on your face. “No, it’s just- I shouldn’t have called you.”

His brows creased. “Hey, I told you that I wasn’t busy-”

“No, no it’s not that.” He raised his eyebrows at you questioningly.

“I just- okay. I probably shouldn’t be telling you this either but…” You laughed. “I’m so gonna regret saying this in the morning.” You breathed out. “I kind of have a crush on you.”

His eyes widened, and you could see colour spreading to his cheeks. “...Oh?”

“Um, yea. And getting you to come over probably wasn’t the best idea considering that- well it’s not like anything was going to happen because you don’t even like me in that way but if it were to it just-” You sighed. “It wouldn’t work right now. And I kinda just screwed myself over by getting you to come despite all of that since…” You shrugged. “Well, since I really like you.”

He stared at you blankly, and his mouth had slightly fallen agape about three sentences ago.

“Y/N…”

“You don’t have to say anything though, okay? It’s fine. I just wanted to tell you. Didn’t wanna have another thing just swirling around in my brain late at night.” You groaned. “I’m sorry, I don’t even know what I’m saying at this point-”

“Y/N, relax.” He chuckled.

You brushed a hair out of your face. “Basically my point is, I probably shouldn’t have called. Getting over you has been hard enough right now and… this definitely isn’t helping that.”

“Then don’t get over me.”

“...What?” 

“Don’t get over me.”

“Why?”

“Because I’ve had feelings for you for a while too.”

Your hands came up to cover your mouth again, shock clearly displayed on your face. “You’re kidding.”

“Dead serious.” He laughed again, brushing his long hair out of his face as he leaned back on the couch. 

“Grayson… why didn’t you tell me?”

“I dunno.” He shrugged. “I was just so sure you didn’t feel the same way that I didn’t see a point in telling you.”

You stared at him, your hands falling into your lap. “Are you serious?” You groaned, your head falling back onto the couch. “God, if you’d just told me sooner…”

“But why sooner?” He got up now, looking at you. 

“What?”

“Isn’t this good? That we both know now?” He leaned in closer to your, his hand coming up to cup your cheek. 

“Grayson…” You started, but the look in his eyes cut you off.

“I know you said that you wouldn’t be ready for anything but- We don’t need to do anything too serious yet.” 

“I don’t know…” You bit your lip.

“Just, let me take you out for dinner tomorrow.” 

“Gray!”

“That’s all I’m asking.”

He leaned in more, his nose now brushing yours. How badly you wanted to just close the distance between you both but…

You pulled away. “Gray, I can’t. I’m sorry.”

His hand fell away, his face falling as well. “Right. Sorry.” 

You coughed. “You know, it’s late. You should probably…”

He sighed. “Yea, okay.” He got up. “I’ll see you later?”

“Yea.”

He nodded at you, but the look in his eyes hurt you in a way that you’d never felt before. He walked around the couch, making his way for the door. You watched his back as he reached for your doorknob…

“Gray, wait.”

His head whipped around to look at you. “What?”

“Stay here tonight.”

“God I was hoping you’d say that.” He walked backed over to you in two long strides, grabbing you as he kissed you intensely, almost knocking you backwards but his hands steadied you by gripping your back and waist. He pressed his lips firmly into yours, and you gripped his shoulder’s tightly from your head spinning.

“Ooh, Hold on,” You pulled away from him for a second. “Head rush.” You giggled.

He grinned, pecking your lips and then pressing his forehead to yours. Then his eyes suddenly turned serious. 

“You sure this is okay?”

“Yea.” You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him one more time. “We’re gonna be okay.”

[sunshine-pup-fics]

R E C K L E S S // Iida x Reader

A fic? After over 6 months of writers block?? When my last fic was posted before Christmas??? WHO KNEW I HAD IT IN ME!?

Not me. 

I’ve been struggling to focus on even just one short Oneshot long enough to get it done... Quarantine sounds like the perfect time to get stuff done, but I've been bogged down in work.  I have no idea when the next fic will be done. I don’t even know if people read this blog anymore. This was actually requested on my Wattpad upload of these fics, but its something! Hope I still got the skills-

WARNINGS: Angst, implications of death, a heated argument.

Working hard. Studying diligently. Striving the best and carrying the Iida name. That's what was important to him. He had to uphold his reputation, his stature. Who else was meant to keep the class in check, if not him? And admittedly, he'd been doing well so far. He was acing his studies and was on track with his quirk training. Nothing was supposed to get in his way of becoming a Hero. So it became a concern when he started to find himself... distracted. It started with casual glances. Brief ones whilst he waited for the next notes, or before he left the classroom for lunch, or when he passed them in the hallway, or when- okay, so more times than he'd like to admit. But then it moved to small talk. Asking about their day or reminding them of the weather when they left class.

Soon enough, he found himself writing their name neatly in the margins of his notes. He was embarrassed, appalled even, by his own behaviour, and even rewrote the entire page of notes when Izuku had asked to borrow them. He knew this was unacceptable. He could not, would not, let this... complication, get in the way. He couldn't risk it. Not when he was already on the path to what he had worked toward for so long.

Yet after a gruelling 4 months after his initial realisation, he was still trying to ignore it, snuff it out, he was going absolutely mad. He had tried not speaking to them, but that lead to an entire ordeal on its own. He tried just ignoring the feelings, 'digesting the butterflies', but it just made him more aware of how they made him feel. Every day was its own battle against himself. How were you ever supposed to win that?

So after much deliberation, he resigned himself to just tell them. It was the only logical conclusion to this mess. No matter the outcome, it would be over, right? Either he'd gain their affections and have the most astonishing person by his side, Or, and he didn't want to think about this outcome to much, he'd be rejected. Told he wasn't good enough. Perhaps to stoic. Maybe he wasn't smart enough. Could he considered too over the top? Possibly he overthought things.

But he wasn't good enough. He knew that. But he had to do it for his own sake. So he could accept his fate and move on. At least things would go back to the way they were before. He could just focus on being a hero again.

Exhaling his breath, along with his nerves, Iida tentatively knocked on their door. There was a muffled "coming" from inside, followed by footsteps. The door cracked open, the hallway lights illuminating a small portion of the unlit room. (Y/n)s face appeared through the crack, a warm smile forming on ther lips as they realised who it was. They quickly slipped outside, closing the door behind them. Iida quietly cleared his throat, gaze shifting to stare at the wall beside their head. "What can I do for you Iida?" Their voice was calming to him, it nearly left him speechless. Nearly. "Ah, I was just wondering- well, seeing how well you've worked recently—" He paused, earning himself a inquisitive look from the (h/c). He cleared his throat, refocusing his gaze on them. "I would like to take you out to eat on Friday night." (Y/n) raised a brow, but otherwise had smug look on their face. "I wasn't aware the class rep was rewarding us for working diligently." Their words held no mockery or ill will, but Iida still felt his stomach churn over the words all the same. He lightly shook his head, forcing a polite smile. "With how much you've improved, I thought it would be a good reason for praise." (Y/n) nodded along. "Alright, sounds good to me. Friday it is. Though you..." They trailed off for a moment, letting their gaze slip to the floor. "You know I have to go visit my parents first, right?" Iida simply nodded, a sincere glint in his eyes, perfectly framed by his glasses. He raised a hand over his heart and bowed his head. "Of course, I would never dream of taking that time away from you." At his sweet answer, (Y/n) could barely contain the warmth that spread through them. "Can't wait then."

Iida went over his outfit again in the mirror. This wasn't too flashy was it? Or was it not flashy enough? They were just going to a simple diner... Why was he so worried about this? He couldn't stop thinking about (Y/n). Had he already messed up? Asking them out... would it have been better if he continued to squash his feelings? Surely not. He really did truly want to be there for them, but he knew that relationships cost time and effort, which was not something he had a lot spare of at UA. He glanced at his phone. He had another 20 minutes before (Y/n) usually got back, but he figured he'd go wait in the common room... maybe it'd keep his mind off it.

Heading down, he noticed everyone crowded around the TV. It was deathly silent besides some news reporter rambling nonsense. He wanders over, peering over the heads of his classmates. There was a large red banner at the bottom with "BREAKING NEWS" scrolling past every few seconds. He leant over to Uraraka, who was seated on one of the couch armrests. "What's this about?" She jumped, gaze shooting to him as she let out a yelp. A few others turned to look at them, looking overly alarmed to see Iida standing there, but they said nothing. "U-Uh.. Well... We were watching some TV when some news came in..." she trailed off. "There was a villain attack on a store near here. It usually wouldn't be a big deal but we heard Aizawa get called out for it so... we're just uh... watching to see whats the problem." Uraraka stiffly turned back to the others, returning their gazes. Iida turned his attention back to the screen, at just the perfect time. "A young girl near the scene spring into action at the beginning of the villains attack, bravely intercepting one of the villains acid attacks and using her quirk to save those nearby, nearly at the cost of her life. Further inquiry is needed, but the girl has reported to be one of the infamous students of 1A attending UA." The class watched in silence as their classmate, and friend, flashed up on screen, mostly hidden behind a very angry looking Aizawa. The silence became deafening. Everyone was too afraid to breathe. "They acted quickly, managing to save a small family who otherwise may have been lost." "W-Well... they look alright. I'm sure they're fine." Deku muttered, anxiously rubbing the nape of his neck. "What do you mean theyre fine. That reporter just said they nearly lost their life." Iidas voice boomed throughout the common room. Everyone looked to him in varying degrees of surprise, fear and sympathy. He blinked rapidly, exhaling a deep breath before averting his gaze. No one knew what to say. Uraraka reached out, gently patting his arm. Deku scooted closer, stumbling over his words as he tried to reassure his friend. "Look-" Mina pointed at the screen and everyones focus fell back to it. "It said they left the premises a while ago for safety reasons. If Aizawa is there then they'll probably come back here right?" The group nodded. "Unless they have to go in for questioning. They did use their quirk without permission and get involved in a villain attack-"

The group went dead silent as they heard the front door swing open. First to enter was Aizawa, somehow looking more tired than usual, followed by a rather downcast looking (Y/n). Midoriya opened his mouth to speak, but was silenced by a glare from their teacher. "I'm sure you're aware of what happened. However it doesn't concern you lot... for once. Make sure you get to bed on time." He turned to (Y/n), cold gaze as he stared down at them. "I'll be dealing with you tomorrow..." He averted his gaze, before placing a gentle hand on her shoudler. "Good work." And then he left.

(Y/n) only glanced toward the group, hands clutched to their chest and a downcast look on their face. They said nothing, only quickly averting their gaze before heading toward the stairs. "(Y/n)" They paused, turning their gaze toward the voice. Iida was staring them down across the room. They opened their mouth like they were going to speak, only to quickly close it and bite their tongue. They made no movement toward the stairs however. Iida briskly walked over. "What are you doing?" (Y/n) clicked their tongue. "Going to my room. Kinda had a rough night." They lingered there for a second, squinting at him. "Ah-" Their face lit up in realisation before it fell back to a frown. "Sorry, but I think I'll have to forego our plans." Iida shook his head. "That doesn't matter. I just wanted to know what you were thinking." His mouth was set in a thin line. "What... What I was thinking? What- oh. Right. When I 'leapt bravely into action'? I was saving someones life." Their voice was low, and their eyes were set. They were challenging him. "What you did was not right. As a UA student you should know better than to pull stunts like that." (Y/n) flinched away from him. "Excuse me? I saw someone in trouble, and I acted. I would have done it whether I attended UA or not." Iida frowned. Both their voices were beginning to raise. "Then that proves you're not ready to become a hero. You have to think about yourself too." "Sorry, I wasn't aware you were the one who decided who should and who shoudnt become a hero now. I'll be sure to listen to your advice next time!" "All I'm saying is that you shouldn't have risked yourself like that without at least calling for backup or alerting proper heroes!" "It was the logical thing to do! I couldn't just leave them there!" "You should be ashamed! It was a reckless attempt, and you were lucky no one was hurt!" "That's what heroes do, Iida! We act when no one else can!" They accusatorially stabbed his shoulder with their finger, glaring at him. "That doesn't mean you don't think things through and act in haste! You clearly didn't actually plan any of it!" He leaned forward, towering over them. "Oh what? So now I'm incompetent because I saved someone's life?" their glare hardened and they flung their arms out. "Nearly at the expensive of your own life! It's imbecilic!" "Oh I'm sorry 'Mr go off and fight a known hero killer alone head on', I didn't hear you over your hypocrisy!" "That was a mistake, at least I understand that! You know that situation could have gone wrong and have ended up the same as with your family, correct?" "You. Leave. Them. Out. Of. This." They glared daggers at him, words dripping with malice. "Tell me I'm wrong. You shouldn't have taken that risk!" "I can't believe this. You're so invested in scolding me for one stupid mistake! Maybe I shouldn't have done it, but I did! I risked my life for another because I couldn't bare to watch another family be torn apart by grief as mine did. Is that it, are you happy now?" "N-No! Of course not!" "What else do you want then? Why do you even care?" "Because I'm worried!" "So is everyone else, but I don't see them interrogating me! I've already been chewed out by Aizawa too! Everyone else understands something had to be done! Why is this so important to you?" "Because I was scared I might loose you! Scared I'd hear the news the love of my life had died!" The room went silent. Iida closed his eyes for a moment, hauling a deep breath before facing his words. (Y/n) stood, body shaking as they hauled breaths. They blinked rapidly, emotions swelling behind their eyes. After a moment longer, they finally dropped their arms to their sides, lowering their head in defeat. "And to think I believed that 'the love of my life' would support me. That you would understand better than anyone why I had to do it. Oh how wrong I was." They summoned as much hatred as they could, staring Iida down without falter. And then they left. They spun on their heel, nearly sprinting out of the common room into the night. The few classmates had long been silent, unable and unwilling to butt into their argument. Uraraka tentatively inched closer, leaning sideways to try and catch Iidas gaze. He didn't even notice her. His shoulders shook with each of his breaths, weighed down by his own guilt and his eyes glistened behind his glasses. "Iida-" Uraraka began to speak, voice nothing more than a whisper, but she was cut off. "I know... I know." He hauled a deep breath, straightening his back as he set his gaze on the exit. To hell with his reputation. His studies, his work. He only needed to make sure they was okay.

He didn't even need his quirk to catch up with (Y/n). They'd collapsed on one of the benches, sobs and cries muffled by their hands as they vainly attempted to stop. He could hear them muttering to themself, vile comments on their idiocy. He felt his heart splinter, an oceans worth of regret slamming over him as he realised he had done this. He was the cause of their suffering. Their tears and their cries. Iida staggered toward them, subconsciously reaching out. Upon his movement, (Y/n)'s gaze snapped to him. For a moment, all he could see was the hatred and anguish... and then it slipped away. Scrambling to their feet, they closed the gap between them. He barely had time to react before they'd collapsed into him, smushing their face into his shirt to hide their face, balling the fabric in their fists. Iida instinctively wrapped his arms around them. He'd make up for what he'd done, even if it cost him everything else.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

d’you have any fics w sherlock n mycroft being sweet/protective brothers?

Hey Nonny!!

YES, AND I have enough to do a Part 2 list for you of the list I was gonna rec to you, so HERE YOU GO!! :D

Feel free to add more, guys!

BIG BROTHER MYCROFT Pt 2

See Also: 

Big-Brother Mycroft Pt 1

Matchmaker Mycroft

Kintsugi by distantstarlight (E, 14,772 w., 1 Ch. || Post S4, Emotional Hurt / Comfort, Regret / Remorse, Loneliness, Separation, Drug Use, Healing, Protective John, Sad Sherlock, Dev. Rel., Complicated Relationships, Love, Angst With Happy Ending, Sherlock is Called Freak, John’s Penance, Voyeurism, Doctor/Caretaker John, Guilty John, Detox, Fingering, Love Confessions, Cuddling, Slight Non-Con Turns Enthusiastic Consent, Virgin Sherlock) – Sherlock Holmes becomes estranged from the man he had once considered his best friend after John lets him down horribly in public. It seems that the world’s only consulting detective will be on his own once again…or will he?

The Winter Garden by Callie4180 (T, 31,213 w., 13 Ch. || Post-S4, Retirement, Christmas, Slow Burn, Grown-Up Rosie, Parenthood, Rosie’s Cat, Angst with Happy Ending, Holidays, Beekeeping, Magical Realism, Sherlock POV, Sherlock’s Violin, Future Fic, Sussex, Honey, Magical Healing Honey, Love Confessions, Sherlock’s Scar, First Kiss, Touching) – As Sherlock nears the end of his career, he’s given the gift of a cottage in Sussex. The honey from the beehives out back is amazing. Almost…magical.

The Whore of Babylon Was a Perfectly Nice Girl by out_there (E, 32,897 w., 1 Ch. || Past Drug Use, Blowjobs, Toplock, Mentions of Switching, Rough Sex, Background Cases, Sherlock’s Past, Sherlock’s Sexual History, Experienced Sherlock, Past One Night Stands, Fingering, Cuddling, Possessive Sherlock, Paris Holiday, Bed Sharing, Naked Lie-Ins, Bathing Together, Confessions, Worried Sherlock, Laying in Bed All Day, Meddling Mycroft, Naked Lazy Day) – Sherlock walks into a room and takes all the space right out of it. He does the same inside John’s head. !!Mycroft discourages the relationship

carrying up his morning tea by darcylindbergh (E, 34,504 w., 5 Ch. || Post S3, Minor Character Death, Grief/Mourning, Wakes/Funerals, Estranged John, Pining Sherlock, Depression/Insecurity, Slow Burn, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Chronic Pain/Injury, Reconciliation, Awkwardness, Loneliness, Scars, Angst With Happy Ending) – His fingers tremble as he dials and he can’t force them steady. Familiar number, even though he hasn’t used it in two years. He isn’t even sure he should be calling it now, but she’d asked. She’d made him promise.

Anchor Point by trickybonmot (E, 49,856 w., 80 Ch. || Truman Show AU || Psychological Drama, Suspense, Slow Burn, Dark Characters / Fic, Alternating First/Third Person, Protective John, Anxious/Worried Sherlock, Tender Moments, Love Confessions, Hand/Blow Jobs, Cuddling, Jealous John, First Kiss/Time, Literal Big Brother is Watching) – The world tunes in nightly for Sherlock, the ultimate in reality TV: Sherlock Holmes, a real person with a legendary name, unknowingly lives out his life in a staged setting contrived by his brother. Things get complicated when a retired army doctor joins the show to play the part of Sherlock’s closest friend. This fic borrows its concept from the 1998 film, the Truman Show. However, you don’t need to have any knowledge of the movie to enjoy this story.

Points by lifeonmars (E, 53,791 w., 42 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || HLV Rewrite / Canon Divergence, Married Life, Pregnancy / Baby Watson, Drinking to Cope, Boxing / Fisticuffs, Clueless John, Angst, Minor Medical Drama, Tattoos, Christmas, First Kiss/Time, Eventual Happy Ending, Love Confessions, Doctor John, Sexuality Crisis, Slow Burn, Case Fic, Drugging, Blow/Hand Job, Emotional Love Making, Parenthood, Passage of Time) – What if His Last Vow never happened? This fic picks up a few months after John and Mary’s wedding, in an alternate universe where Magnussen doesn’t exist, but Mary is still pregnant. Life continues – just in a different direction. And slowly, Sherlock and John find their way to each other.

The Thing Is by TSylvestris (E, 56,743 w., 21 Ch. || Case Fic, Dev. Rel., Anal/Oral, Blow Jobs, Meddling Mycroft, Drama, Romance, Humour, Casual Encounters, Pining Idiots, Possessive Sherlock, Orgasm Delay, Rough / Alley Sex, Public Sex, John Whump, Drugged John, Emotional Love Making, Awkward Relationship, Marriage of Convenience, Switchlock, BAMF John) – The problem with living with Sherlock, John thought, was that you never, never, ever knew the significance of anything. Like your flatmate’s nose buried in your hair. Whilst you’re in bed. Part 1 of Nitroglycerine

Impossible to Feign by achray (M, 49,204 w., 12 Ch. || TRF Rewrite / Reverse Reichenbach, Suicidal Ideations / Discussions, Drug Use/Abuse, Mutual Pining, Friends With Benefits, John Accepts his Sexuality, Anxious Sherlock, Meddling Mycroft, Depression, Hallucinations, Secret Agent John, BAMF John, Reunion, Make-Up Sex, Ambiguous Ending) – Sherlock leant forward, his long fingers curving round to grip John’s.“I won’t let him win,” he said, eyes hard. “I will do whatever it takes to get you out.”

The Bang and the Clatter by earlgreytea68 (M, 137,049 w., 37 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Baseball AU || Slow Burn / Dev. Rel., Possessive/Obsessive Sherlock, Jealous Sherlock, Mutual Pining, Body Appreciation, Depression, Closeted Sexuality, Family, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Ogling Each Other, Anxious Sherlock, Panic Attack, Drunkenness, Talk of Forever, Big Feelings™, Mycroft is Meddling and an Asshole) – Sherlock Holmes is a pitcher and John Watson is a catcher. No, no, no, it’s a baseball AU. Part 1 of Baseball

Proving A Point by elldotsee & J_Baillier (E, 186,270 w., 28 Ch. || Me Before You Fusion || Medical Realism, Insecure John, Depression, Romance, Angst, POV John, Sherlock Whump, Serious Illness, Doctor John, Injury Recovery, Assisted Suicide, Sherlock’s Violin, Awkward Sexual Situations, Alcoholism, Drugs, Idiots in Love, Slow Burn, Body Image, Friends to Lovers, Hurt / Comfort, Pain, Big Brother Mycroft, Intimacy, Anxiety, PTSD, Family Issues, Psychological Trauma, John Whump, Case Fics, Loneliness, Pain) – Invalided home from Afghanistan, running out of funds and convinced that his surgical career is over, John Watson accepts a mysterious job offer to provide care and companionship for a disabled person. Little does he know how much hangs in the balance of his performance as he settles into his new life at Musgrave Court.

Free Falling by twistedthicket1 (M, 203,574 w., 38 Ch. || Guardian Angel John, Fluff and Angst, Humour, Kidlock / Teenlock, Mystrade & Johnlock, Passage of Time, Possessive John, Drug Use / Overdose, Victor Trevor, Additional Tags to be Added) – All Guardian angels are born with a Chosen human. When this child is born, the angel comes into being to protect and care for them during their life on Earth. For John Watson, all he cares about in the world revolves around his Chosen, Sherlock Holmes. Watching him grow up though, the angel soon learns that God must have had a sense of humour the day he decided to make Sherlock, as trouble seems to follow him like a magnet wherever he goes. John can’t decide what’s worse, the idea of losing his Chosen one, or the fact that he may be breaking the most taboo law of heaven as he disguises himself as a human to better protect and befriend the beloved detective he’s always watched from afar. He was meant to care for him. But what happens when caring evolves into something more? What happens when an emotion an angel is supposed to be incapable of possessing comes to life suddenly and viciously inside John’s chest?

[for-ests]

Always Enough- Peter Parker x Reader

Okay so this imagine was an anon request that I had previously posted, but I accidentally deleted. I didn't mean to, so here’s a re-upload. Happy finals & sorry my dumbass clicked the wrong button on tumblr mobile because im stupid

Summary (bc the request deleted w/ the post): The reader realizes she had been neglecting Peter because she was stressed over school. Peter thinks there might be another reason because she has become distant. Confrontation and angst follows!

Word count: 2, 360

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Finals were a killer, especially for a nursing major like yourself. The stress of it all made you want to curl up into a ball and cry. Cry for hours until you couldn't cry no more. 

But that wasn't an option. What you dreamed of becoming, something simple, yet incredibly difficult, was growing out of reach. Your hours of studying had led you nowhere, only to barely tangible grades. Grades that were barely above average. You were disappointed, discouraged, and running out of options.

What else would you do with your life? Becoming a nurse was the only thing you had ever wanted to be, it was all you knew. Ever since aliens rained in the sky, your only motive was to help the ones who couldn't help themselves. But how could you ever hope to do that when you couldn't pass biochem?

What didn't help your anxious mind was the house you had to stress over, and your minimum wage restaurant job that didn't add to your required expertise. Tears welled in your eyes as you remembered you had to lay a payment down on your ever-increasing student loans. Maybe college wasn't for you. Perhaps it was never meant to be. Your summer money was running out and fast.

Just breathe. You repeated. I don't have time to cry.

You could cry after you studied. And right now, you had barely glanced at your flashcards for more than ten minutes. It seemed like you were paralyzed, sitting in bed with your flashcards scattered around you, all of them laid out and waiting for involvement.

Just as you were about to pick up the first card, your phone buzzed beside you. Instinctively, you glanced at it, your heart dropping when you saw Peter's name flash across the screen.

Date. You had a date night, and you forgot.

"Fuck!" You cursed out loud, the tears you had tried so hard to control seeming to burst over your eyelids. How could you forget?

Peter: I'll be there in 15 minutes :D

You replied immediately, glancing at yourself in the phone's reflection. You looked terrible and distraught beyond compare.

Y/N: Peter…im so sorry I forgot, i'm not ready

Peter: oh

Y/N: i have a huge exam soon, maybe its for the best that we rain check? i'm sorry I know ive done this before but im really stressed about it

Peter: we havent talked for days, y/n, i think theres more going on than what youre telling me

Y/N: what? of course not wtf

Peter: im coming over anyways, ill be there soon

Y/N: why?

Peter: we have to talk.

Your heart dropped down to your stomach. Those words were what you had been dreading, and all focus you had managed to gather vanished into thin air. You knew you had been neglecting Peter's affections. Even if every fiber in your being wanted to make him the single most important thing in your life.

It had been almost a week since you'd seen him, and honestly, it was painful in the most innocent way.

But Peter didn't have to worry like you did. He was gifted and already had his entire life ahead of him, set in the middle of Stark industries. But you never asked for a handout, you never asked for help. Even though you knew he was the smartest young man around. You were proud to be his, and the thought of that disappearing was more detrimental to you that failing your upcoming exam.

Y/N: ok, front door is open

Tears were rolling down your cheeks at this point. You had been with Peter for over a year and had gone without seeing him for longer, but he was right. This time was different. This was the third date you had canceled without wanting to, but sometimes apologizing wasn't enough. Peter deserved a lengthy explanation of what you were really going through.

You were so used to holding back your emotions, that times like this were an occasional reoccurrence. You had always been so afraid of unloading your burdens onto others that you still sometimes forgot that having a boyfriend came with that perk. He was still going to love and cherish you if you asked for help and advice. Hell, you needed to realize that he wanted to.

That was a factor of why you were so in love with Peter. He always listened, and sometimes, even push the truth out of you when he could tell you needed it.

"You're already crying, huh." A sad smile was on Peter's face as he opened the door. His sudden appearance startled you, and you managed to chuckle despite the circumstances.

"You know me." You sniffled, immediately embarrassed by the state he had caught you in. Instinctively, you brushed your hair to the side and dabbed the tears from under your eyes. You could feel the remnants of Make-up drying to your skin.

"I didn't mean to ruin your study-"

"But we need to talk." You finished, shoving your school supplies to the edge of the bed. You made enough room, so he was able to sit comfortably.

Slightly embarrassed, you kept your gaze averted as best as you could. Just Peter's presence made your heart flutter, and a part of you was trying to prepare for the worst. You might really lose him this time. And for what? Yes, school was incredibly important, so, so important. But so was Peter, and you needed to find a balance.

Your silence was enough to beckon Peter's thoughts into the open.

"I just need to make sure you're still serious… about us." His voice was soft as if it was struggling to stay neutral.

Finally, gaining the courage to look at him, you locked eyes. Peter's gaze was heavy and forthcoming, and it took all of your willpower to swallow the knot in your throat.

"Of course, I am." The conviction was entirely evident in your tone. So much so, that Peter fell silent. His accusations seemed to die in his throat, but he knew that if he didn't get them out now, they would creep back to him later.

"It's hard to tell sometimes," Peter muttered, unable to gaze at your confused expression. You looked so hurt.

Your silence beckoned him to continue.

"I haven't properly talked with you in a week. You've canceled our last three dates… it seems like you never want to hang out with me anymore."

Peter winced. He was a grown man, and he sounded like a child. Yet, he had let so many things slide, hoping you would come around, hoping you would make it up to him. Perhaps he had been selfish to only think of himself in the relationship. He failed to realize that maybe in attempts to please him, you were putting your own future on the line. 

"I know you're going through a lot, but you can't even seem to talk about it." Peter's shoulders felt tense, his eyebrows knitting together in an agitated expression. His leg was bouncing up and down uncontrollably. He looked like he was about to burst.

"I'm sorry." You said, trying to swallow the knot in your throat. Pausing, you tried to gather your thoughts into cohesive sentences that would soothe his anxious mind.

"There's nobody else, right?" He suddenly blurted, actually turning his head to look at you. Insecurity was glazed in his eyes for the first time.

"Why would you even think that?" You said, startled. The question felt as if he had shoved your head underwater and held it there just long enough for you to choke on the liquid.

His expression was blank for the first time. Vulnerability at its finest. "My life isn't perfect, you know. I overthink just like you. I need reassurance."

Peter was so calm, so calm that it worried you. Though you were already afraid of how this conversation would go, it hurt you to realize that this conversation was the result of your actions. You failed to make Peter feel special like you had promised. Like he had promised you. Relationships go both ways, and for the last couple of weeks, it had only gone one.

"No, Peter. There will never be anyone else."

He sighed, relaxing slightly. "You've been acting weird. I don't really know what to think."

"I told you a billion times, I'm studying. After work, that's literally all I do. And I need to focus."

"I feel like there's more. It feels weird to not see a text from you when I wake up. It feels weird to not hear your voice. I don't… I don't like it, Y/N. Even if that's selfish."

And selfish it was. Peter expected you to be transparent while he was hiding possibly the biggest secret in the world. Maybe that was why he was so worried about how much you loved him. Peter wanted to be honest with you. He wanted you to know he was spider-man, but right now, he still couldn't bring himself to. Perhaps he was looking for a reason.

"I'm sorry." Your hands were clenched in your lap. "I've never had to deal with this before. Everything is so new, even if we've been together for a year. I've never cared about anyone like this, and I can't manage my time."

Peter paused as if every word in this conversation pained him to no end. His eyes were glossy, his mind unclear. He was desperately trying to understand why you were isolating himself. "You can't make any time for me?"

"That's the thing, I can't focus on anything else when I'm with you." Your lip quivered. "And that's a problem."

"It's not for me." He said quickly. "I make time for you, and you don't for me. And you need to tell me why."

You glanced away, embarrassed. No matter what you said, the reason wouldn't be good enough. You were just a bad girlfriend.

Peter reached his hand out and pulled you to him. You rested your chin upon his shoulder, soothed to feel his warmth once again. "You need to tell me, Y/N. We've made it work for this long, and all of a sudden, it stopped."

Your body started to shake. Trying to muffle your sob, you brought your hand to your mouth. It was all too much.

"-You have your whole life together, Peter. I have nothing, I still have to work for it. I'm not as smart as you, I'm-"and that's when the tears started to flow. It was a literal flood, tear after tear poured over your eyelids until they were bloodshot, until pressure pounded through your head.

Before you could finish, your face was pressed against Peter's chest. He held you tightly, his sweatshirt dabbing up your tears of sorrow. You gripped tightly to him, releasing the stress that had been building up inside of you for the last two weeks.

He did not know what else to do. Showing you that he loved you seemed like the most viable option. Sometimes all you had to do was listen, and that was enough.

"I got a bad grade on my midterm exam, one that I didn't study for because I spent my time with you—I thought-"

"Shh." He stroked your hair, understanding what you meant without a complete explanation.

"I work so hard, and it's never enough-"

"It's always enough, Y/N."

"I got so caught up in it that I neglected you in the process. So much so that you thought I was cheating on you" you inhaled sharply, whimpering against him, so many different emotions swirling through your mind. "You're the best thing in my life, and I put you second…"

"Look at me, Y/N." He cupped your cheeks in a swift movement, forcing you to look at him through tear-filled eyes. "You are enough for me. That's why I bothered to have this conversation with you. That's why I care." He pressed his lips against your forehead. "I love you."

"I love you too, Peter." You tilted your head up to kiss him wholly on the lips. You were a mess, but Peter had always told you that you looked beautiful when you cried.

"Rosy cheeks." He whispered, patting down your hair, inhaling your scent, and appreciating the beauty you constantly radiated.

You chuckled, sniffling loudly. Peter always said that after you had a successful mental break down, your cheeks brandished a rosy shade.

"Shut up." You whispered, tightening your grip around his torso. His back fell against your bed, and you shifted to lay completely on top of him. The firmness of his chest underneath you caused instant relaxation, instant relief. Maybe, just maybe, being in his presence was enough to get rid of the stress from everyday life.

The corners of your eyes were raw and red, yet it complimented your shade. Peter vowed from the moment he had met you, that he would never let any harm come to you. The last thing Peter had ever expected was that he might be the reason, instead of the world.

At least, for now, he had the power to fix it. You were the love of his life, and he had never felt so gratified to be in anyone else's presence.

Peter's fingers traced light, small circles on your back. He could hear your heartbeat slow. The softness of your finger against his was enough to help him close his eyes.

He was at peace, real peace for the first time in weeks.

"We need to remind ourselves to talk about shit more." You mumbled sleepy, almost inaudible. "So this doesn't happen again, because I hate it."

"Me too, babe." He whispered, content with watching you rise and fall in sync with his breathing.

"I couldn't bear to lose you."

[vertanimeni]

the ice will start to break, the day will fade away (12/18)

Summary:

“Have you heard? The Elephant of Caocin has committed high treason!”

From Trikru’s most reputable war hero to Trikru’s most wanted traitor, Kova found themselves stripped of their titles and trapped between a clan that wants them dead and a camp of invaders - the same ones who kidnapped and tortured their brother.

But Kova was willing to do anything to stay alive and keep their family together.

Pairing: Bellamy Blake/Grounder OC

Word Count: 5,450

TW: Virus/Illness, vomiting, blood, explosives

A/N: I’m... actually being decent w the schedule for once... LOL wow~ If you’re reading through my blog, the read more does not show up due to Tumblr’s new formatting, so please click on the post itself. As of right now, I will be updating every Friday at 4pm EST.

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xii. implosion.

The group entered the dropship. Finn, with Clarke in his arms, made a beeline straight for Wells, who prepped a bed for her.

"What do I have to do to stop you from coming in here?" Her question was but a murmur.

"Get better."

"If he's not sick by now then he's probably immune, like me." Octavia assured her leader. "The virus doesn't last long, either." She added casually and let Murphy and Wells dominate the conversation while she dragged Kova into a private corner. None of the others noticed — too preoccupied with Clarke and the new information.

"Did you know?" She asked when the two were finally alone.

"Know what?" They sat crisscrossed on an empty crate.

"Where do I begin?" With every point, she ticked off a finger. "The virus; Lincoln leaving to 'east of the sea and across it,' or whatever; the—" She cut herself off, lowered her voice, and leaned in close, "—the upcoming attack?"

Needless to say, she had connected a few dots on her way back to camp after her conversation with Lincoln. If she recalled correctly, Kova had returned in the dead of night, and woke up late the next morning. But didn't they have enough time to at least warn somebody? Even herself?

"Lincoln and I talked a lot that night, and when I returned, I was already tired. The next morning Bellamy woke me up to find you and I ended up having to take care of the sick here. It just slipped my mind." Kova leaned in. "Besides, if I did say anything, he and Clarke would know I sneaked out. I can't risk that, either." 'Well, now Bellamy and Miller know, but still.' Pausing, they leaned back and eyed the young woman for a second, a hint of hope in their eyes. "Are you leaving with us?"

"Leaving?"

"East of the sea and across. Floukru. Will you come?"

"…Lincoln wants me to."

"That didn't answer my question."

"You're going?"

"…If Clan Leader Luna gives me permission, then yes." It took only a brief moment of doubt where they had considered their words carefully. They weren't sure to what extent Octavia knew about their relationship with Trikru. But then Octavia's eyes glinted with curiosity—

"Kova," Finn interrupted suddenly, completely unaware of the tension between the two, "how much time do you think we have until the virus passes?"

While they were just as taken aback as Octavia was, Kova couldn't help but think, 'Ah, Finn, perfect timing. I'll have to burn some bud for him in thanks.' "It's a light strain, so a day or two more, maybe? Three at most." They replied.

“They need to stay hydrated.” Clarke’s voice rasped out from afar, catching Finn's attention.

"You need to stay hydrated." Rolling his eyes, Finn almost rushed back to her side, but Wells signaled that he had it covered. He turned back to the two and said, "If we had more time to recover from the virus, then we could fight back. We just need to slow them down. Come with me, let's go talk to Raven.” He left no room for argument and rushed past the curtains.

The two stared at empty air for a moment until Kova broke the silence. "Let's talk about this later."

Octavia pursed her lips but conceded, and the two followed Finn to a tent on the other side of the camp. Just as he pulled back flap of the door, the three heard Raven’s voice in the middle of her sentence. “—need as many rounds done by dawn as we can.”

“It won’t matter if there’s no one left who can shoot.” Finn cut in just as the three entered.

Inside, Raven stood behind a desk scattered with empty bullet shells and powder. She refused to even look at Finn, but welcomed Octavia and Kova; Bellamy and Monty leaned over a corner of the desk with a map; and to Kova's surprise, Jasper and Harper stood off to the side, shifting uncomfortably when the two noticed their presence.

Finn continued, "What do we need to build a bomb?”

Pop! went the joints in Kova's neck as they whirled on Finn, a disgusted and betrayed look on their face. They stepped back, almost tripping over the wiring of the tent. 'Finn, what the actual fuck?' They thought, and because they were never one to hold back, they said, "Finn, what the fuck?"

"Wait. Hear me out." Finn held up his hands in a placating manner. "Murphy said he crossed a bridge on his way back from the grounders’ camp. Sounds familiar?”

Their eyes softened from the sharp glare they held. While they understood what he meant, they really wish he had given them a heads up beforehand.

“Is that the only bridge around here?” Bellamy switched his gaze from the hastily made map to Kova.

“It is.” They confirmed. “Ankon bridge is the only one that connects TonDC to the rest of Trikru territory the fastest, since the forest and the river get in the way. There's another bridge far down the river, but if the warriors are planning to come though Ankon, it'll be a major setback to change their plans to the other bridge."

“The virus is fast. Murphy is already getting better and Kova thinks it’ll pass within a few days. Blowing up the bridge won’t stop the attack, but the longer we delay it, the more of us will be able to fight.”

Kova couldn't hide the flinch at the mere thought of blowing up the bridge. Not only will it be a major setback, but the residents of TonDC, Fort Nauk, and other surrounding villages will end up suffering for it. Especially the merchants.

"Even if Murphy is telling the truth — and that’s a big if — that bridge has survived a nuclear war and 97 years of weather. What do you think, Raven?”

Everyone turned to the mechanic. She paused for a moment, considering the many different ways to build a bomb before it hit her — the fuel from the Exodus ship. Her eyes sparked with sturdy confidence. “It won’t survive me. Everyone, out while I think. Get ready to head down to the Exodus site.”

Jasper and Harper were the first to leave, the former refusing to look anywhere near Kova's direction and the latter sending them a sharp glare. For the first time, Kova internally thanked Bell when he pulled Octavia out of the tent for a quick talk.

The grounder turned to the remaining two boys. "You finished with the fish?"

"Yup," Monty popped the p.

"Zoe and Drew were almost done when we left. I'm not sure who's cooking tonight, though." Finn spoke. Kova noted the subtle flinch of Raven's back turned towards the three.

"Got it. Nice work. I'll see you guys later, then."

Monty quickly said, "Sorry about Jasper, he's being a bit of a dumbass right now. Just give him time." Then, he and Finn left the tent.

The sound of metal clinking gently made Kova turn back to Raven and lean against one of the side tables in silence, mindlessly toying with one of the bullet shells, while Raven moved to work on the second desk with another map. Familiar, higher quality, with rough estimation marks at Mount Weather, the camp, a burial ground. They recognized it as the one Clarke had made when the delinquents first arrived—

A clatter and a huff caught their attention. Raven had dropped whatever she was working on and turned to Kova. "What do you want? Why are you still here?"

“What’s bothering you?”

“Excuse me?”

Being nosy with one of the few people in this camp who didn't hate them was the last thing Kova wanted to do, but they've gone on missions with people who had lingering issues from an argument right before, and it never ends well. 'Like Zoya and Zandara, when they had a fight right before our mission because Zandara thought Zoya had been stealing her food, but it had actually been their other roommate at the time.' While the memories had a tint of melancholy attached, internally, Kova didn't know whether to laugh or shiver with fear. 'That mission was the only blemish on their record.'

"Something is going on with you and Finn." Octavia had mentioned their strained relationship before, that almost everyone on camp thought he had been cheating on Raven with Clarke out of all people, but she didn't go in depth at the time, and right now, Kova really wished she had. "Do you want to talk about it?"

As if Kova had damaged the final piece of a dam on its last legs, Raven burst with a long rant. "My head still hurts when I crash landed on Earth and I'm kind of terrified of a concussion even though Clarke checked me out; I'm worried about what's gonna happen to the people on the Ark; I'm worried I'm gonna die in some war I never signed up for; and I came down here to be with the guy I've loved for years only to find out he's—?" She paused, her voice cracking. "He cheated on me? He cheated on me with Clarke, and wasn't even going to tell me about it. I had to find out myself. And I think he's still cheating, even though he says the opposite, and I—" She took a deep breath, her tense shoulders sagging. "There's a lot of things bothering me right now."

To be entirely truthful, Kova had actually expected Raven to tell them to leave her alone, or that she didn't want to talk about it, or maybe even tell them to fuck off. And while they were pleasantly surprised about the rant, they weren't going to interrupt or stop her.

She continued, “And today when Clarke passed out, Finn just caught her without hesitating! He risked his entire life for her and didn’t even think twice about it! The last time he did that was for me on the Ark, and…" Her voice trembled, and the first tears dropped and gathered at her chin. "As much as I don't want to admit this, but I think I lost him the moment he came down here. I just don't know what to do."

"Did she know?"

"What?"

"Did Clarke know that you and him were in a relationship?"

"I…" Raven recalled the sky leader's surprised face when she kissed Finn, how heartbroken she looked. "I don't think so."

"So he didn't tell Clarke about your relationship, and he didn't tell you about his relationship with her. That's on him. As much as I hate to say it, you're right. You probably lost him the moment he came down here. If he has fallen for her, there’s not much you can do about it now.” While their words felt harsh, they tried to speak as gently as they could. Raven wiped her face with the back of her hands. They weren't one to give out advice like this, but if it reeled Raven back from those types of thoughts, they didn't mind. “I'm not sure if you're angry at Clarke, but regardless, there's no point in fighting over some boy, especially one who isn’t giving you the love and appreciation you deserve, and you deserve much better than that.”

“He’s the only one I have.” It was a weak argument, and Raven's jarring quiet voice showed that.

“Then you need more people on your side." They purposely made eye contact and said, "Fuck him.”

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Obtaining the hydrazine from the Exodus ship wasn't as hard as Raven expected, and pouring it into a mason jar was even less. Like any responsible scientist/mechanic, Raven wore a suit — the same one she came down to Earth with — but once she sealed the jar closed and set it safely on the desk, she took it off and addressed the people waiting outside her tent. "Alright, you can come in now."

Bellamy entered the tent first, Kova following close behind—

Two hands grabbed the sides of their arms. "Boom!"

If they jumped and busted the top of their head on the overhanging lamp, that was their business and theirs only. They tried to play off the spook by clearing their throat, but that only made Raven cackle. Even Bellamy couldn't hide his snort.

Then Finn entered, and Raven's mood soured slightly. She dropped her hands from Kova's shoulders, trying to play it off as nothing and said, "You guys can relax, it needs an accelerant.” Then, she got into business on how the bomb needed to be built and placed on the bridge. “To be safe, you need to be at least 200 feet away to make the shot and not get injured.”

“Feet? Imperial system?” Kova's question was implied — 'Why use the Imperil system?'

“It’s the measuring system we used on the Ark.” Finn explained. “What do you use?”

“The metric system. We’re not animals.” They refused to acknowledge the smirk on Bellamy's face. "Does the distance you calculated include traumatic force?”

“It should.”

Bellamy laid out the billion dollar question. "Alright, who plants the bomb?"

The silence lasted well under a minute, but long enough to feel like an hour. Finn finally stepped up, and Bellamy dragged him to the map to discuss how to go about it.

Meanwhile, Raven and Kova stood side by side, speaking lowly as to not attract attention.

"So he hesitates when it comes to a bomb, with everyone's lives on the line, but not with Clarke? You see what I'm talking about right? I'm not crazy?"

"No, you're right. I get what you mean."

“Finn, we only have one bomb.” Bellamy’s voice brought both of them back to the conversation at hand, but Kova turned around and organized the bullet shells on the table, keeping their back to the others. “We need to use it to kill as many of them as possible.”

“But they don’t know we only have one bomb.” Finn argued. “If we did, why would we waste it on a bridge? It’s supposed to be a deterrent. Peace through strength.”

“The appearance of strength, you mean.” Raven countered, ignoring the look he sent to her.

“The men who built the bombs thought they were peacemakers too. How’d that work out for them?”

“They were scientists, Bellamy." They turned, eyes lowered on the bullet shell they held. "They knew exactly what they were doing while building those bombs, they definitely knew they weren’t peacemakers. They just did it for the money.” Looking up, Kova's eyes widened, face blanching, and they dropped the shell. "Shit.”

Before he could ask, warmth trailed down from his nose to his philtrum. He pressed the back of his hand underneath his nose and grimaced. "Great."

“Don’t touch anything.”

“Who else can take a shot?”

“Appreciate the concern.” His usual snark felt weak. A heavy tiredness fell over Bellamy's body like a weighted blanket, so suddenly that his head felt fuzzy. He could barely muster the energy to glare at Finn. Instead, he stumbled towards the exit. “Just make sure the bomb is packed and ready to go in ten minutes, I’ll go find someone.”

“Wait, Bellamy!” Kova called out, but he already left. "Shit, he's only going to hurt himself like that. I'll bring him to the dropship — I'll see you two later, don't die and don't get hurt!"

"Kova—!"

"Wait—!"

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On the Ark, there had been a few rounds of the common cold and the like running around. It was hard to avoid getting sick once there was an outbreak — the quarters were too close to one another, people ate together, shared their drinks, etc, etc. Back then, everyone had to self-isolate, and those sick had to deal with a stuffy nose, running snot, and sometimes a fever for a week or two.

Those illnesses were a joke compared to whatever the fuck this virus was.

The nosebleed was just a breaking point to the onslaught of other symptoms that racked Bellamy's body. The dizziness popped up in the tent and only grew worse when he reached the campfire, the flicks of the flames staining his eyesight. He thought he might have snapped at the friends Jasper was with, but that didn't matter right now. Right now, all that mattered was getting Jasper to do the job. After making sure Jasper was at least six feet away from him, he explained what the group discussed at the tent.

Later on in the dropship, once the fever broke, Bellamy will stare into the metal ceiling and wonder what exactly did he say to Jasper that made him blanch and shake so much.

“Take the shot. You can't miss, or we’ll all die.” Once the words were out of Bellamy's mouth, it wasn't his problem anymore. He grew more delirious with every passing second, but one coherent thought made its way through. 'Dropship.'

Staggering rather than walking, he only made it three steps before the world abruptly turned white and his head felt staticky. Wind whooshed through his hair, in his rushing ears, cooling his heated and sweaty skin, and the side of his head bumped into metal before his body tilted towards the floor—

—Warm hands splayed across his back and the nape of his neck.

At first, he thought it might have been Jasper who caught him, and he tried to push him away. But then his hands landed on strong shoulders and thick arms, and even through his delirium he thought, 'Muscles…not Jasper—?'

A deep voice, surprisingly gentle for its owner, confirmed his thoughts. "Relax. It's me."

The whiteness cleared up from the edges and inward to reveal a blurry Kova-shaped blob. They tried pushing him back on his feet, but his legs and arms shook under his weight, and with another whoosh of the wind, Bellamy found himself being carried bridal style, an arm against the back of his sticky, sweat-soaked shirt, another arm beneath the back of his equally sweaty knees.

His mouth felt dry, although he wasn't sure if it was from the fever or—

Kova's cold glare fixated past him. He followed their line of sight to Jasper, who had stepped forward with his arm stretched out, as if he wanted to snatch his leader and run from the grounder. The last of Bellamy's energy went into holding up his hand in a placating manner. His voice was awfully raspy, but it got the job done. “I’ll be fine, go find Finn. Take the shot.”

Half reluctant, half relieved, the boy ran off.

"By the Gods, Bellamy. What did you say to the kid? He looks even paler than you."

Too many words. Head too heated. Bellamy thought he internally groaned, but it seemed as if he did this externally, given that Kova hushed him (gently, to his surprise). Later on, while staring at the metal ceiling of the dropship, his embarrassment over being carried so easily in such a way will turn into a frustration he had never felt before, and he'll end up kicking his legs against the bed in anger, much to the distaste of the other patients around him.

But for now, his neck lolled around, energy finally giving out, and black spots dotted the edges of his vision. Just before he closed his eyes, he heard them murmur, "Don't worry, I got you."

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"…tavia!"

The frantic call of her name came from outside the dropship. The young woman in question raised her head and settled the bowl of water next to the patient she had been looking after. A few seconds of silence passed, and Octavia thought she might have imagined it—

"Octavia!"

The sound of crunching leaves turned into metal thumps. She sprung into action and hurried to the curtains, yanking the fabric back—

Kova rushed inside, bending over slightly to avoid the curtains. It was only when they straightened did Octavia notice the body in their arms, the person's face buried in their neck and nose dripping dark blood against their skin, and automatically, she pointed to the open bed at the corner.

Then it hit her — the ruffled black hair, olive skin blanched and covered with a sheen of sweat, sprinkled with freckles and blood— "Bell, no…"

By the color of his face and the spasm of his throat, Kova realized he was about to vomit any second and quickly laid him on his side, and the moment his hip met the mattress, he vomited. Some caught on Kova's pants, but they paid little mind to it as they pushed the fringe of his hair back. "I'll go get him some water."

Octavia knelt on the opposite side and rubbed soothing circles against his back. "Okay. Thank you."

On their way, they heard a faint murmur of Bellamy's voice and Octavia's quiet, assuring tone. Distracted, they shoulder-checked a passerby. Kova turned to apologize, but paused when they found Murphy's back instead. Jaw tense, they prepared for whatever verbal attack he would send them, but to their surprise, he walked off without a word.

'Oh? Maybe Clarke spoke to him.' Whatever, Murphy wasn't their problem. Eventually, they returned to the Blake siblings with a cup of water, but Bellamy had fallen into unconsciousness once again.

“Kova…"

"Hm?"

"I still have a few hours before Wells takes over this shift." Her gaze shifted, hesitant. "Would… You mind keep an eye on him?"

'Oh. She…' "Of course." They answered. "Go ahead."

Any animosity her eyes might have held this morning were long gone now. Eyes shining, she squeezed their shoulder in thanks before running off to finish her duties.

Leaving Kova alone with her brother.

Pointedly looking away from the mess, they sat by Bellamy's side and brushed the fringe of hair away from his eyes. They leaned down and pressed their forehead against his, only to flinch away. "Hot." They muttered, taking the wet towel and cold bucket of water Octavia had left behind, "His temperature is still going up." A sigh passed their lips. They dabbed at the sweat rolling down his forehead, cheeks, and neck before wrapping the towel in a neat rectangle and placing it over his forehead. “It’s going to be a long night.”

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Waking from unconsciousness felt like wading through tar, and it took Bellamy a moment to register the cold towel across his forehead, the warmth of someone kneeling by his side. Thinking it was his sister, he placed a hand on 'her' knee in comfort—

"You're awake." A surprised, yet quiet voice, far deeper than Octavia's, spoke.

He pulled his hand away slowly. Phlegm stuck in his throat, he tried clearing it out to speak, only to flinch at what felt like sandpaper grinding against his vocal cords.

"Don't strain yourself. You coughed and vomited a lot."

The sound of dry grinding caught his attention, and it was only then did Bellamy notice the mortar and pestle in Kova's hands. As if someone flipped a switch in his nose, the stench hit him like a sucker punch — whatever ingredients they had blended together made his eyes water and the bridge of his nose to crease.

Kova didn't look like they were doing any better, and they answered the unasked question with a wry smile on their lips. "Lime juice, onion, cloves, and ginger. Nasty combo, but it works like a charm. It's also the only thing I can make without fucking it up somehow."

His throat protested, but he managed to get one word out. "Why?"

"My younger sister would get sick often, so I learned my mom's recipe." The pestle paused, they looked at him over the mortar. Whether it was the headache from being stuck in a sick room the entire day or exhaustion from caring for Bellamy and the others around them that made their brain falter, Kova couldn't tell, but it certainly loosened their tongue. "Unless… that wasn't the question?"

With a gritty sensation clawing at his throat, Bellamy didn't want to reply, and simply watched as Kova stopped grinding. They raised the bowl to their nose, grimacing like the ingredients physically attacked their well-being, and pulled away. They nodded as if thinking, 'Yup, perfect.'

And while Bellamy couldn't tell where the fuck the spoon in their other hand came from, he knew damn well what was going to happen, and no way was he letting that monstrosity of a concoction anywhere near his mouth—

"Stop being a baby," Kova snapped after the third time Bellamy clenched his lips and turned his head away. After the fifth attempt, they let out a heavy sigh, pinching the bridge of their nose. "The things I do for Octavia…" They muttered under their breath, and suddenly the mortar under his nose vanished.

At first, Bellamy thought he won.

And then he watched as Kova pour the so-called medicine into their own mouth, and suddenly, he wished he had just accepted the mortar. It seemed as though the onion hadn't been properly grounded in the first place, judging from the audible crunches in their mouth. They chewed up the concoction further for good measure—

Leaned over his face—

His mouth parted in shock, eyes widening—

'Are they actually going to—?'

Three fingers pried his mouth open, and there was a plop! before the palm of their hand pressed against his mouth, letting the mushed up medicine slide right on his tongue. He gagged, but they refused to move until he swallowed with a thick gulp. God, the aftertaste was even worse than what he expected.

They were about to remove their hand, only to yelp and snatch it back, cradling it against their chest. "Did you just bite me?!"

"Fuck you."

"You fucking animal." Filled with disbelief and indignation, they scoffed and wiped their hand on his shirt, adding onto his anger. "Whatever — I only did what Octavia asked of me."

They pulled out a cup of water, and as tempted as he was to knock it out of their hands, he wanted to be rid of this awful aftertaste, now that his throat didn't crawl with discomfort. 'Huh.' His suspicious gaze landed on them. "Why are you helping me?"

"Didn't I just say?" They grabbed one of his hands and forced him to hold the water. "Your sister entrusted you to me. How could I possibly let her down? Now drink."

“You need to stay away from her.” He warned, albeit halfheartedly. His arms shook under his weight, but Bellamy managed to lift himself on his elbows. He took a sip, then gulped down the entire cup. But when he set it down on the floor, he noted the streaks of blood and the remaining specks of vomit splattered around, including on Kova's pants. Realization dawned on his face, and Kova pointedly ignored it as they took the cup from him.

“I would take you more seriously if you weren't acting like a child.” The teasing smirk on their face only riled him up more. "Besides, it's far too late for that, anyways."

The perk of his eyebrow was a question all on its own.

"Don't forget, as much as you don't like my brother, they're a thing now." They gathered the used towel and the bucket of water dyed orange from the blood. "She surprisingly understands our culture. As long as she protects my brother, and I'll protect hers." Their own eyebrows perked up, the teasing smirk growing. "Even if I don't like him too much."

Bellamy's scoff turned into a small huff of laughter. "Shut up." He looked away with a sniff. "Any updates on the bridge?"

"Finn and Jasper left a while ago. Raven is missing — no clue where she is, but she most likely went to follow them. No explosion so far." Suddenly, they looked over his head. "Clarke."

"Hey. Didn't know he woke up." The mattress dipped when she plopped next to him. Red lined the deep circle around her eyes and dry blood cracked along her cheeks to her chin, as if she had been crying.

"Finn said you shouldn't be taking shifts." They were met with a pair of guilt ridden eyes, and an exasperated sigh passed their lips. "Rest. I can handle it now that sleeping beauty here is awake." 

"Shut the fuck up." Bellamy never had the intense feeling of wanting to smack that frustrating smirk off their face until now.

In the end, Clarke nodded her agreement. Kova stood, patting Bellamy's shoulder before grabbing the bucket and the towel. "Don't die while I'm gone. Applies to the both of you."

"Got it." The two leaders rasped out at the same time.

Clarke noticed the way his eyes followed Kova until they were out of sight. "Are you feeling better?"

"Yeah." His scowl returned, and he struggled to sit up fully, swinging his legs over the mattress and planting his feet on the floor. His eyes caught sight of Murphy when the boy had moved to another patient. "I see you're letting him take care of the sick." Pausing, he turned to her. "You trust him?"

"After everything? No." She scoffed. "But I do believe in second chances."

His eyes flickered to the cup, then to the mess on the floor. Kova's update finally hit him. "It's almost dawn. We should get everyone inside. If we lock the doors, maybe the grounders won’t think we’re home.”

“But not everyone is sick.”

“Sick is better than dead.”

Silence stood between them for a moment. “You don’t think Finn and Jasper are gonna pull it off.”

“Do you?”

Clarke's sigh broke another moment of silence. “I’ll get everyone inside.”

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The sun rose, and so did everyone's worries. There had still been no signal from the Jasper, Finn, or Raven, so everyone assumed the worst and lined up outside the dropship, wearing makeshift masks from rags. Some even had gloves.

'With such an enclosed, small space, and no ventilation, there's a good chance a few of them will catch the virus.' Kova thought while waiting at the curtained entrance for Clarke's signal. 'But there's a chance for survival. Trikru's attack is an inevitable fatality.'

Their train of thoughts traveled to their time on the Mountain, when they and their fellow warriors had been infected, puking every few steps until it was only acid against their throat. Miller rushed past the ramp and through the curtains, carrying as many guns as his arms would allow, and Kova realized how truly weak the delinquents were. No training whatsoever in 'Earth Skills' or whatever Monty had called it before, no fighting or weapon experience, nothing. If they had landed in Azgeda territory, they would have died within the week—

Boom!

For the first time in Kova's life, an explosion brought relief.

Everyone turned to the mushroom cloud punching through the air.

"They did it." Bellamy's voice startled Kova. They hadn't realized the two leaders stepped out from the dropship.

“'I am become death, destroyer of worlds.'” A murmur came from Clarke's lips. She felt eyes on her, and turned to Bellamy and Kova looking at her with confusion. "Oppenheimer. The man who built the first—”

“I know who Oppenheimer is.” Bellamy interrupted with a small smirk.

“He actually stole that quote from a Hindu scripture, if I recall correctly. So not really his quote." Eyes returning to the mushroom cloud, fear crawled up their spine, jaw clenching, tongue feeling heavy in their mouth, and Kova signaled for Miller to take over on sending people away from the dropship.

Once they knew no eyes were on them, they snuck behind the dropship, pressing the back of their hand to their mouth. This sudden nausea wasn't new — they were well acquainted with how their body reacted to guilt and shame to this degree. But then the mental onslaught came, 'who am I?' 'why did I let them do that?' 'will TonDC and the other villages survive?' 'will Fort Nauk function without the bridge?' 'treason,' 'kill order,' 'my family—?' 

They had already answered a few of these questions when they first heard of the plan to blow up the bridge. There were countless weavers in the villages, and quite a few bridge builders from the Old families. 'They'll be fine,' The one thought cycled a few times while their body climbed over the back wall, stiff, as if on autopilot. They landed, light on their feet—

"Hey."

Kova stood to their full height.

'They'll be fine.'

"Hey." They greeted back, clasping a hand on Octavia's shoulder. "Ready?"

"Let's go."

The two trekked through the forest, following the trail of gladiolus' and lilies.

They'll be fine.

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[ynkkoo-a]

            ♡◞  𝐤𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐨𝐨  𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐬  𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒌 𝒖  !

            not  at  me  repurposing  one  of  my  theme  graphics  bc  i’m  a  lil  lazy  babie  ,  but  !  since  i  jus  hit  another  follower  milestone  n  the  decade  is  comin  to  a  close  ,  i  jus  wanted  to  say  thank  u  to  all  my  mutuals  n  followers  n  such  who  rly  made  this  last  year  enjoyable  on  this  hellsite  !  2019  was  tough  on  a  lot  of  us  in  a  lot  of  ways  ,  but  we  all  did  it  ,  babyluvs  !  we  saw  it  out  to  the  end  n  hopefully  the  20′s  are  a  lot  prettier  for  us  all  !  p.s.  i’m  sorry  to  anyone  not  mentioned  !  i  hav  the  memory  n  attention  span  of  a  babie  fish  ,  but  i  luv  all  of  u  soso  so  much  n  u  rly  all  do  mean  the  absolute  world  to  me  !  ♡

            first  off  ,  jus’  a  quick  an  honourable  mention  to  all  of  my  nonnies  of  the  year  ,  wherever  u  babies  are  now  !  in  particular  ,  my  cherry  nonnie  ,  my  jk  anon  (  @jminacious​​  )  ,  my  boo  ,  my  strawberry  nonnie  ,  n  my  grades  anon  !  n  anyone  else  who  has  sent  me  sweet  nonnies  ,  these  r  jus  the  recurring  ones  of  the  year  heh  !  u  sweet  nonnies  own  my  heart  n  truly  made  this  blog  such  a  lovely  n  pretty  n  positive  experience  for  me  ,  n  i  cannot  properly  express  w  words  how  much  all  of  ur  sweet  mssgs  meant  n  mean  to  me  always  !  ^♡^

            starting  off  w  the  mutuals  i  literally  never  speak  to  ,  bc  of  my  shy  babie  antics  ,  but  who  i  admire  from  afar  so  much  !  ur  all  soso  talented  ,  jus  all  around  beautiful  souls  who  deserve  the  prettiest  days  .  pleathe  feel  free  to  come  talk  to  me  ,  i’ll  luv  u  down  w  my  whole  heart  since  i’m  practically  ur  secret  admirer  anyway  .

@miyanez , @kimseokjvn , @rmsrpt , @capitae , @chunghart , @aronpiper , @jinjeongguks , @yukhciz , @cjdoesrpt , @pocmuzings ,  @chuuiez , @leeieno , @igorrpt , @luvgifs , @joonkookies , @drunkblushed , @savta , @frcylan , @jinsoouls  !

            now  ,  to  give  all  my  luv  to  those  who  literally  . . .  hav  my  heart  .  we  haven’t  talked  much  ,  again  bc  i’m  a  shy  babie  ,  tho  sum  of  us  hav  jus  recently  been  talking  more  which  makes  me  very  sparkly  ,  but  !  we  exchange  ims  here  or  there  ,  send  an  ask  or  two  ,  reply  to  n  like  each  other’s  posts  ,  support  each  other’s  content  ---  u  know  ,  we’re  cute  mutuals  !  the  ‘  will  they  ,  won’t  they  ‘  mutuals  !  for  realsies  ,  tho  ,  ur  all  so  talented  ,  whether  it  be  in  making  gifs  or  themes  or  graphics  or  writing  or  whatever  !  ur  talent  astounds  me  n  i  am  beyond  in  luv  w  u  !

@sprfluous , @chanheez , @loonarz , @jungjnsoul , @yeriimss , @hotjoong , @hiqey , @tcehyvng , @kvinabstract , @stcinfelds , @kermitgrinch , @mcninas , @doyyeon , @jminssii , @jiminslolli , @raihelps , @svnflxwer , @softcarpenters  !

            n  now  for  honourable  mentions  !  the  few  ppl  on  this  site  who  my  shy  babie  antics  did  not  keep  me  from  talking  to  n  becoming  friends  w  .  these  are  the  literal  luvs  of  my  life  !  our  ships  are  literally  *chefs  kiss*  ,  i  feel  comfy  cryin’  n  rantin’  to  u  guys  without  worryin  abt  being  annoying  n  i  hope  the  feelin’  is  mutual  ,  i  don’t  feel  even  an  ounce  of  anxiety  when  talkin’  to  u  guys  which  is  such  a  major  thing  for  me  ?  i  consider  u  guys  my  friends  sm  n  our  friendship  literally  means  the  world  to  me  .  ur  soso  talented  in  so  many  ways  n  u  hav  the  loveliest  hearts  ,  n  i’m  so  honoured  to  be  able  to  be  ur  friend  n  to  write  w  u  all  !  

            p.s.  there’s  cute  lil  mssgs  for  each  of  u  under  the  cut  !

@pointlcss , @ultraviclets , @musetories , @briingmetolifc , @heartvfire  !

♡◞  @pointlcss  !

                    alli  !  ♡  i  am  literally  so  happy  that  u  happened  upon  my  lil  1x1  post  a  couple  months  back  n  decided  to  mssg  me  abt  threading  bc  our  cute  lil  starstruck  plot  turned  into  a  friendship  that  i  am  soso  so  thankful  for  ?  there  is  not  anyone  that  i  wld  hav  rather  gone  thru  it  over  jungoo’s  long  hair  ,  tattoos  ,  n  haircut  w  .  that  one  pic  of  jjk  from  season’s  greetings  as  our  matching  discord  icons  . . .  stayin’  up  to  yell  abt  stray  kids’  n  txt’s  comebacks  . . .  i  literally  luv  this  for  us  ?  ur  soso  talented  n  making  gifsets  n  writing  ,  n  i’m  so  happy  i  cld  make  this  last  year  a  lil  bit  special  for  u  ,  bc  u’ve  made  this  year  such  a  special  n  pretty  one  for  me  too  !  i  can’t  wait  to  see  where  our  cute  lil  plot  n  ship  takes  n  i  hope  the  year  has  even  more  luvly  things  in  store  for  us  !  i  luv  n  adore  u  soso  so  much  .  u  rly  are  the  sweetest  soul  out  there  n  i’m  so  happy  to  consider  u  a  friend  !  also  thank  u  for  jus’  now  informing  me  abt  bts’  2020  tour  i  owe  u  my  lifeKSHDKJ  ♡

♡◞  @ultraviclets  !

                    ness  !  ♡  literally  . . .  the  luv  of  my  life  ,  perhaps  ?  i  remember  following  u  when  u  published  ur  first  theme  ,  bc  i  was  jus  like  .  wowow  wubbzy  ?  this  is  beautiful  n  free  n  i’m  broke  n  u  hav  my  heart  ?  n  u  know  ,  for  a  while  we  were  sort  of  will  they  ,  won’t  they  mutuals  ,  too  ,  which  was  cute  for  us  ,  but  i  think  we  actually  started  talking  when  we  were  both  in  abroad  ?  n  then  u  mssged  me  later  on  to  lmk  that  jjk  was  open  in  ur  rp  if  i  wanted  to  join  n  it  made  me  so  absolutely  soft  ???  like  .  ik  it  was  jus  a  lil  thing  but  u  captured  my  whole  HEART  in  that  moment  ?  n  now  ur  genuinely  sumone  that  i  trust  so  much  ,  like  .  the  other  day  when  u  let  me  rant  to  u  a  lil  bit  abt  smth  kinda  silly  ,  rly  ,  it  jus  meant  the  world  to  me  ?  n  u  mean  the  world  to  me  n  !!!  writing  w  u  is  absolutely  wonderful  always  n  our  current  ship  is  *chefs  kiss*  even  tho  i  hav  yet  to  reply  to  our  thread  again  BUT  !!!  i  will  do  it  ,  i  pinky  promise  ,  i’m  sorry  i’m  the  worst  .  u  deserve  the  whole  wide  world  .  ur  talented  beyond  belief  ,  ur  such  a  blessing  to  the  rpc  n  this  hellsite  as  a  whole  ,  n  i  adore  n  am  soso  so  thankful  for  our  luvly  lil  friendship  every  time  we  talk  .  u  truly  hav  made  this  icky  year  a  lot  less  icky  !  u  hav  my  whole  heart  !  ♡

♡◞  @musetories  !

                    sarah  !  ♡  u’ve  genuinely  been  one  of  my  best  friends  for  four  years  +  one  month  now  n  like  ?  wowow  wubbzy  ?  that’s  such  a  long  time  !  from  the  rp  that  shall  not  be  named  to  lit  rally  whatever  tf  we’re  doin  rn  .  u  were  the  first  person  i  ever  rly  shipped  w  on  this  hellsite  ,  even  tho  i  was  a  whole  babie  n  my  writing  was  godforsaken  at  the  time  .  n  now  we  lit  rally  hav  so  many  ships  up  our  sleeves  that  i  can’t  even  name  them  all  ,  but  i  luv  each  n  every  one  of  them  soso  so  much  ?  sum  of  them  are  so  iconic  that  they’re  jus’  eternal  now  (  we’re  rly  ALWAYS  on  our  eli  &  zazzy  bullshit  )  n  i  kind  of  adore  that  for  us  ?  we’ve  spent  so  many  our  jus’  stayin  up  into  the  night  /  morning  writing  novels  in  my  dms  ,  n  those  are  genuinely  sum  of  my  fondest  rp  memories  ?  we  don’t  rly  talk  quite  as  much  anymore  ,  but  that’s  okay  n  it  happens  !  we’ve  had  sum  ups  n  downs  ,  but  i’m  genuinely  soso  so  thankful  for  ur  friendship  these  last  four  years  n  here’s  to  four  more  heh  !  n  also  u  got  my  into  bts  so  i  owe  u  my  lifeKJSHKD  ♡

♡◞  @briingmetolifc  !

                    mozzie  !  ♡  wowow  wubbzy  ,  i  cld  genuinely  write  a  novel  abt  u  ?  we’ve  been  friends  for  practically  four  years  now  ,  too  ,  n  to  think  it  all  started  w  our  one  lil  ship  in  the  rp  that  shall  not  be  named  !  i  can  actually  n  genuinely  jus  talk  to  u  abt  anything  ?  whether  it  be  our  ships  ,  a  random  plot  i  wanna  write  ,  the  political  state  of  our  country  ,  how  fucked  ap  classes  are  ,  mister  jungoo  himself  ,  whatever  issues  i’m  having  w  sumone  that  i  need  to  get  off  my  chest  ---  there’s  literally  no  limit  or  bounds  to  what  we  can  talk  to  n  it’s  so  nice  ?  like  .  i  genuinely  trust  u  so  much  ?  u’ve  always  jus  kinda  been  That  Person  who  i  know  i  can  trust  w  anything  ,  who  i  never  felt  wld  judge  me  ?  like  i  can  jus  tell  u  anythin  ,  i  trust  u  so  much  .  ur  genuinely  one  of  my  best  friends  ,  even  when  ur  tryin  to  fight  my  babie  or  we’re  both  bein’  bratty  n  silent  treatmenting  each  other  or  ur  bein  a  stubborn  lil  babie  n  won’t  let  me  do  ur  theme  for  u  even  tho  !!!  i  luv  doing  ur  themes  !  but  it’s  okay  bc  u  hav  my  heart  ,  n  i  genuinely  ???  wld  be  such  a  different  person  w/o  u  in  my  life  for  the  past  four  years  i’m  sure  ?  n  also  ur  such  an  amazing  writer  ,  ur  muses  are  so  unique  n  ur  writing  is  so  fluid  n  ???  god  !!!  everythin  abt  u  is  smth  that  i  adore  .  pleathe  come  to  california  n  be  my  first  kissie  . . .  i  luv  u  !  ♡

♡◞  @heartvfire​  !

                    kacchan  !  ♡  oh  my  god  ???  where  in  the  world  do  i  even  BEGIN  ???  ur  genuinely  one  of  the  most  important  ppl  in  my  life  .  i  met  u  first  when  i  was  a  literal  fckin  babie  in  the  rp  that  shall  not  be  named  a  whole  four  years  ago  now  ,  n  like  .  we  didn’t  talk  a  ton  at  first  ,  but  u  were  never  weird  or  condescending  bc  i  was  young  ?  like  ,  we  eventually  did  start  talking  n  i���m  soso  like  ???  happy  that  we  got  close  ?  like  .  since  day  one  ,  i’ve  looked  up  to  ur  writing  n  u  as  a  person  ?  ur  characters  were  always  so  insanely  creative  and  unique  and  ur  writing  was  so  fluid  n  beautiful  n  just  ?  u  were  literal  goals  to  lil  14yr  old  kookoo  .  n  even  now  ,  whenever  i  do  a  reply  to  u  ,  i  will  literally  write  n  rewrite  it  five  times  over  before  posting  it  bc  i  want  to  make  sure  it’s  as  good  as  urs  is  !  like  !!!  god  ur  so  talented  !  n  like  .  especially  as  of  late  ,  we’ve  jus  gotten  super  close  ?  n  like  .  i’m  genuinely  so  happy  abt  it  ???  our  friendship  is  genuinely  a  WHOLE  blessing  in  my  life  ,  like  .  ik  i  can  talk  to  u  abt  anything  n  u  can  talk  to  me  abt  anything  n  we’ll  meet  eachother  w  the  same  amount  of  enthusiasm  ?  we  can  vent  to  each  other  n  completely  understand  n  empathise  n  talk  things  out  so  we  feel  better  n  it’s  jus  ???  we  jus’  get  each  other  ??  so  nice  .  thank  u  for  listening  to  me  when  i’m  anxious  or  sad  ,  n  for  not  thinkin  ill  of  me  when  i’m  bein  a  brat  ,  even  when  it’s  for  silly  reasons  ,  n  for  listenin  to  n  not  judging  me  when  i  talk  abt  jungoo  n  bts  ,  even  tho  i  talk  to  them  a  lot  n  ik  i  can  be  a  bit  much  sumtimes  .  like  ,  genuinely  ?  i’m  abt  to  start  crying  rn  ,  i’m  so  thankful  for  u  .  u’ve  helped  shape  me  so  much  as  a  person  .  helped  me  grow  as  a  writer  .  i  met  u  at  one  of  the  worst  n  most  important  ages  of  my  life  n  u’ve  impacted  my  life  such  an  insane  amount  ???  u’ve  always  been  the  first  person  to  talk  to  n  comfort  me  when  things  go  to  shit  n  i  truly  cannot  express  how  much  that  has  always  meant  to  me  .  i  genuinely  think  i  wld  be  a  bit  of  a  different  person  n  not  as  confident  in  my  writing  if  i  didn’t  hav  u  to  look  up  to  for  these  past  four  years  .  i  trust  u  so  much  n  i  luv  u  soso  so  much  !  n  i  am  going  to  reply  to  the  dm  u  sent  me  properly  ,  i  jus  need  2  formulate  my  thoughts  properly  first  ,  so  pleathe  hav  this  for  now  !  u  literally  hav  my  whole  HEART  !!!  ♡

[yievie]

whew! what’s up everyone! my name is crissy and yes, i am the clown who sent my account ask on anonymous last night. luv that for me! I GOT A COOL FAMILY ICON IM CRYING!!! now this is yi eun hye, better known as evelyn yi or evie, paging dr. sexy md don’t call her that though, she’ll kill you omg the second eldest princess of the four neglected korean princess sisters aka the mom friend sister or the buzzkill responsible sister. 

~`click anywhere here for a link to my app ~

under the cut i’m gonna throw some important personality and background stuff along with maybe? half-formed plot ideas? if not i’ll make a follow up post later, but pls like this plot if you wish to plot, i’ll try to come bother u. my ims are open hmu anytime (also bc im anxious af to b first message bc im BABY) and I ALSO have a discord located at quarantine queen#2918 where i’m usually v v v active. (lmk if u cant add me shoot me a message on here and ill fix it) ok imma shut up here is cranky daughter! ITS LONG SRRY

( pS: also if my blog is too hard to read just stick /mobile on the end of the url xx )

background 

the empress and emperor of korea had 5 kids, 4 daughters, 1 pampered son and evie was the second oldest daughter after dianna but like, she’s bossy and high strung and acts like the oldest anywayS so it doesn’t matter!

woo! however, korean tradition is rooted deeply in patriarchy and other backwards thinking,  >:(((( so evie’s parents basically pretended like their son was the only kid they had and sent evie and her 3 sisters off to swedish boarding school to ROT as they each turned 10 and forgot abt them while they groomed their son for the throne! thx mom n dad! luv u too! sdjlaksjd

during her time at boarding school evie was expected to not learn much of anything, not do anything spectacular, she wasn’t expected very good grades or to be smart or successful or anything bc that was Men’s Work and so evie did . . . THE EXACT OPPOSITE.

evie EXCELLED in school, straight a’s, top of her class, honors, ap valedictorian, which meant all nighters, nose bleeds at 2am from studying too hard, looking dead walking through the hallways, eating ramen 25/8, falling asleep w her face in her textbooks, getting bullied a lot for being a nerd and Not looking like her sisters and like...the creature from the black lagoon.

her parents, understandably, were not very happy with this but it wasn’t until she wanted to go to medical school that her parents were like FURIOUS. to them, women, esp the princesses, were only supposed to get married, have kids, THAT WAS IT. so evie wanting to be a doctor enraged them. STAY MAD!

they tried to have her engaged SO. MANY. TIMES. but she has a really repellent personality, she’s very kat stratford from 10 things i hate about you. and is rude and states her very liberal very socialist opinions often, dresses sloppy and hurts mens feelings a lot just for fun so they all went rUNNING from those match appointments! her parents literally are losing their minds they don’t know what to do w her theyre like god why did we give birth to the aNTICHRIST!?!?!?

not wanting anything to do with her parents, evie got into college and medical student on scholarship based on her own merit and skill. evie went to the seoul national university for 4 years then did a 2 year residency at the country’s top hospital, becoming one of the best on call heart surgeons there.

the korean media likes to clown on her A LOT! bc shes scary and angry and cares very little abt her appreance is A DOCTOR and not a princess really for the opposite reason they clown on dianna but evie does not really care she doesn’t care abt impressing people, just saving lives and proving people wrong. finger guns

but yes! thats what u missed on glee. evie was a heart surgeon in korea before being shipped off to thailand! shes v salty by the way ... even more than usual.

fun facts?

evie wears massive grandma glasses to see bc shes BLIND when shes in line with her sister people do not think she’s related and are like “OMG OMG THE PRINCESSES!!! BUY WHATEVER U WANT ON THE HOUSE I--oh? maam? uh? can we help u, ahjumma?” HELP

very dry, mean, will call you out on ur shit and hurt ur feelings probably. doesn’t really know how to Chill or have fun, stays out of drama and parties for the most part literally that old man that tells u to get off their lawn

LOVES HER SISTERS!!!! LOVES THEM!!! moms them and nags the FUCK out of them tho abt everything. wear a sweater its cold, drink water, dONT DO THAT GET DOWN FROM THERE, i told u to eat before u drank all that soju pabo!!!! skhaslkfh BUT SHE LOVES THEM VERY MUCH HER WOOOORLD the only people shes kind of nice to

as stated, has tried to been matched up before but has basically scared away all her matches by being A Lot and not polite or dainty and burping probably

her mom calls her all the time to talk abt how shes having a heart attack bc her second daughter is an unmarried, childless, spinster with a cat who is embarrassing her by being a doctor and being loud and obnoxious and outspoken against the royal heirarchy and right wing politics. evie just puts her on mute and lets her keeping yelling at no one for the next hour

loves beer, loves fried chicken, very unladylike, wears oversized sweaters and her hair messy and watches love island australia and the bachelor just to make fun of the people being in love and stupid i think secretly she kind of wants it but...thinks shes unlovable and will die before she says that shh

bisexual legend! cue mr and mrs yi screaming somewhere

not that it matters bc she cares little abt romance and sex and always put work and school before everything so everything touchy like that she either ends abruptly or stays the hell away from

never parties or goes out but when she does get really drunk gets very cute and touchy and happy there is one video on the internet of her like on a table ashdkh yikes 

is soft deep down just like *shrek voice* donkey, orges are like onions they have layers and u gotta get past a lot of them for her to get past her level 4 tragic backstory and into the soft, vulnerable part of her personality its nice i promise she is SQUISHY

weird plots???

best friend? im sure she has one somewhere. or friends at all? people who arent scared of her who shes nice to....mostly

enemies woo! hate her its very easy to hate her so do it

u want to do a daredevil thing like when matt shows up bleeding and dying or after a fight or something and she patches u up

just anyone need a doctor bc paging dr sexy md~

past loves? boyfriend? girlfriend? weird flings? weird tension unresolved stuff WOOO

ANYONE who broke her heart for the angst and drama

hit on her itll b funny

anyone who she was previously matched w who she scared off

someone shes currently trying to be matched or betrothed to GOOD LUCK

someone she has a crush on YIKES or vice versa

any of the college kids need a tutor? 

roommates? 

ANYTHING PLS HMU <333

[17mounteens]

Itch (Seungkwan)

Request: hi !! could i please request a seungkwan soulmate university AU where ur friends with jeonghan whos met his soulmate, but u only recently got close so he introduces u to his friends and u have to excuse urself w jeonghan bc ur tattoo starts to itch and u dont know whats going on,, ill leave the rest to u tysm !!

» You’re friends with Jeonghan, who’s a year above you at your university. He’s already met his soulmate, and as you continue thinking about yours whom you were yet to meet, he figures that having you meet his friends could cheer you up. Your soulmate tattoo acts up, which leads you to discover your soulmate.

» If you’re using the tumblr app and can’t see the scenario, which is under a “keep reading”, please try opening the post in your phone’s internet browser (or a computer)! 💕

» 4,090 words

Turning seventeen was a turning point for everyone. Until then no one was expected to care about their soulmate, although some were still wary of growing feelings towards anyone with the knowledge that they might not be meant for them. You, on the other hand, had been one of those who didn’t really think about it much and instead followed your heart while living life to the fullest.

However, it wouldn’t last forever, and after you woke up during the night before your seventeenth birthday, nothing had been the same.

You had woken up due a tingling, irritating sensation on the back of your right shoulder, and when you had looked at it from the mirror in the morning, you could only stare at the soulmate tattoo that had formed there, a beautiful depiction of what seemed like two flowers meshed together.

Ever since then you had spent countless sleepless nights just gently tracing the tattoo, wondering what the person who had an identical tattoo on the back of their right shoulder was like.

Would they be your type? Would they have similar values with you? Would you share any interests with them? Would your personalities match?

It kept you awake a lot, really. While it was said that your soulmate would be the person you’re the best match for, by the time you were in your second year of university you knew about several occasions where the match had been everything but made in heaven.

That was yet another day when you had gotten lost in thought, thinking about what-ifs regarding your soulmate, and it had not gone unnoticed by Jeonghan. He was a year above you, but since his part-time job had taken a fair share of his time, he was still doing some second-year courses, where you had also met half a year earlier. You hadn’t really started getting closer until recently, however, after you had worked together on a longer project and realized that you got along very well and had a lot of things in common.

And, since he had already met his soulmate, you felt like he was providing you with some sort of support as you still waited for the day when you’d finally meet yours.

“Y/N,” Jeonghan called from the other side of the table you were seated by in the library, and grinned at you when you jolted. “I don’t think thinking about your soulmate will help you in the exam.”

You pouted at your friend, but nodded in defeat. “I know. It’s just… when will I meet them?”

“When the time is right,” Jeonghan said, half-joking, but you knew well that that was the general answer.

“How did you meet your soulmate?” you asked, your eyes trained on the tattoo on Jeonghan’s inner wrist, and only moved your gaze into his dreamy brown eyes when he hummed.

“They came to the convenience store five minutes before my shift ended,” he said with a snort, and you felt your heart drop at how close it had been that he hadn’t met his soulmate that time. “And, you know, when they paid for their things I saw the inside of their wrist, and I just couldn’t let it go.”

You nodded and slowly drifted back to your daydreams, from which Jeonghan would eventually pull you out of again.

You couldn’t help but wonder how you’d meet your soulmate and when. Would it be a similar close call, and more importantly, had you already missed a chance to meet them?

Days went by and your sense of longing for a person you didn’t even know only remained, and as you and Jeonghan also continued hanging out more and more, he had come up with an attempt to cheer you up a little.

You were studying at a cafe that was surprisingly quiet considering the amount of customers, and after eyeing you for a while, Jeonghan finally spoke up.

“Say, Y/N,” he began thoughtfully and placed his pen between his upper lip and nose, from where it fell when you snorted at the sight and he laughed heartily. Knowing that he had your attention, he continued, looking at you warmly. “We’re pretty close now and all, and I’ve got some friends who want to meet you. Are you up for that?”

“Why do they want to meet me?” you asked incredulously, squinting your eyes a little, and Jeonghan couldn’t help but giggle at how adorable he thought you looked.

“I’ve told them a lot of fun stories and they’re always up for meeting new cool people,” Jeonghan noted, and although your mind immediately jumped to what kind of fun stories he could possibly mean, you also found yourself smiling almost smugly.

“I’m cool now?” you asked while scribbling on your notebook.

“Their words, not mine,” Jeonghan said and laughed when you threw him a quick glare. “But so, are you up for it?”

“Sure,” you hummed, mentally going through all the friends you’d ever heard Jeonghan talk about. “So it’ll be… who?”

Jeonghan listed you the names, and you smiled at the memory rules of a kind he had after each one: you weren’t the only one he enjoyed telling stories about. Mingyu, the accident-prone guy who was still the person to go to for help. Joshua, his best friend who had two very different sides to him. Seokmin, the one you got a fun story about at least once a week. Seungkwan, the one who always livened the atmosphere and took care of everyone. And, as the last person Jeonghan could fit into his apartment, Seungcheol, the only one who could ever drag him out for a workout.

“Sounds like a good crowd,” you hummed and nodded. “When?”

“This Friday,” Jeonghan grinned, excited to have all of you meet, which he hoped would not only cheer you up but also enable him to hang out with all of you at once.

Besides, he had a feeling you’d get along with his friends just fine, and so far he hadn’t met anyone who would’ve said no to discovering new people they enjoyed being with.

You waited for Friday with excitement and anxiety, feeling a sense of pressure about meeting people who, at least according to Jeonghan, wanted to meet you. You couldn’t help but feel like they were expecting you to be somehow cool and amazing, and you weren’t sure if you were what they expected.

All you could do, you supposed, was to calm yourself down and meet them with an open mind and, as difficult as it may feel, be yourself.

And so, that Friday you were headed to Jeonghan’s place. When you were still several meters away from the door leading to the hallway, you saw someone open the door to go in, which made you speed up.

Fortunately you didn’t have to raise your voice to ask them to keep the door open for you, as the dark-haired boy turned around right on time and looked at you, and without a word kept the door open until you could get in, too.

“Thank you,” you said with a small smile when you finally reached the door, and felt a new sensation run through your body when your gaze met the boy’s.

Like electricity.

“No problem,” he said warmly and walked to the elevator, where you followed him. After pressing the button to the fourth floor, he turned to look at you. “What floor are you going to?”

“Ah, the fourth, too,” you said and clutched the strap of the bag you had on one of your shoulders.

It was the first time you were feeling so many things in the company of a stranger, and you were confused, to say the least.

Your heart was beating a bit faster, and while you felt restless you also felt comfortable. You had never met the boy before, but there was something very familiar - reassuring - about him, and that feeling only confused you more.

Once the elevator doors opened on the fourth floor, you walked to Jeonghan’s door, and were all the more surprised when the boy stopped next to you and reached to knock on the door.

This time it was you turning to him, mustering up all of your courage before speaking. “Are you one of Jeonghan’s friends?”

“Yeah,” he smiled and tilted his head a little. “I’m Seungkwan. Unless he’s invited more people, I take it you’re Y/N?”

You nodded with a small smile, and somehow the stories you had heard from Jeonghan, most of them positive, made Seungkwan appear all the more warm and comfortable to you.

Before the two of you were able to get further than saying that you were happy to meet one another, Jeonghan was already opening the door and grinning at the two of you.

“Oh, I see you two have already met,” he snickered and let you in to his apartment, where the others were pretty much gathered around the coffee table, some sitting on the floor and some on the couch. Jeonghan looked at the others and pointed at the two of you, as though showcasing you.  “Y/N and Seungkwan are here.”

Everyone greeted you with bright smiles, and all you could do was scan through the faces, some of which you had seen in photos that Jeonghan had shown you, but you could hardly put a name and face together for any of them.

After you and Seungkwan had gotten your shoes and jackets off and everything, you joined the others by the table that had plenty of snacks and beverages to enjoy. Everyone was excited and eager to introduce themselves to you, and while you were a bit nervous in such a new situation with strangers, their antics made you feel more at ease fairly soon. 

You were sitting next to Seungkwan, who somehow only made you feel more comfortable, and his affectionate bickering with Mingyu made you snort from time to time, which he noted with an amused smile.

Not too long into chatting with everyone, you frowned and reached for your tattoo to rub it. It was starting to get itchy, but for the time being you deemed it to simply be irritation for whatever reason; you never knew.

However, as the evening progressed, the itch got worse and worse, to the point where it took up most of your thoughts. You were uncomfortable, constantly rubbing or scratching or grazing the tattoo with your nails, but it never kept the itch away for more than a few seconds. By then you had moved to the kitchen to try to deal with it while drinking water, and Jeonghan was standing by the wall with Seokmin, who seemed to be telling a story.

Sighing, you figured Jeonghan might be able to help you, and so you placed your hand on your tattoo and walked up to Jeonghan and Seokmin. Jeonghan turned to look at you with surprise written all over his face, and his expression turned more concerned when he saw your puzzled expression that also gave away that you were feeling rather uncomfortable.

“Can I borrow you for a sec?” you asked, and Jeonghan frowned a little, but once he saw where you kept your hand, he immediately nodded and let you drag him into his small bedroom.

“Are you okay?” he asked when you were in the peace of his bedroom, and you nodded while lightly scratching your tattoo.

“I guess, it’s just… my tattoo is itching a lot and I don’t know why, and I thought maybe you could help me a little,” you said through your discomfort, and once you lifted your gaze to Jeonghan’s eyes, you were surprised to see them as big as they were. 

His eyebrows only seemed to rise more and more, and when you quirked your eyebrow, urging him to just spill it, he melted into a playful smile. “Y/N, that’s kind of… that means you’re near your soulmate.”

You processed his words for a moment, and the more of it registered in your brain the faster your heart started beating.

You were near your soulmate. 

Having been at Jeonghan’s place some times before without any itching on your tattoo, you figured that maybe it wasn’t the location but the people, and so you slowly moved your gaze out of the bedroom door, scanning over his friends that you’d just met.

With the widest grin you’d ever seen on his face, Jeonghan turned to look back into the living room, too, scanning over his guests. “I really wonder who it is.”

You could only nod as you looked around as well, your heart beating fast in your chest at the possibility of meeting your soulmate. Your gaze went over everyone again and again, yet you were constantly drawn to a very particular guy with a loud laugh, a bright smile and a habit of fixing his fringe by a shake of his head.

Your breath hitched in your throat when you took note of just how often he was rubbing the back of his right shoulder, always accompanied by a puzzled frown.

Before you were able to finish your thought, Jeonghan turned to look at you with his eyebrows raised. “I think your soulmate might be Seungkwan.”

And as soon as you thought about how you had felt in his company that evening, starting from the very first time your gazes met at the door to the hallway, it all made sense.

How you hadn’t realized to think more of it was beyond you, and you still weren’t sure if your soulmate really would be Seungkwan, but you were itching to find out - quite literally, too, you noted bitterly as you tapped your tattoo with your nails in an attempt to ease the itch a little.

“How did you not realize this before?” you asked Jeonghan with a pout and hit his arm with your hand lightly.

He was still grinning almost uncontrollably, and he looked at you warmly while shrugging. “He’s just really the type to keep his shirt on and while we’ve talked about soulmates, he’s never shown me the tattoo.”

“Okay,” you huffed, and felt your heart flutter the slightest bit when Jeonghan mumbled something about having a feeling about you getting along particularly well with Seungkwan. 

“Alright Y/N, come on, time to get things going,” Jeonghan more or less declared before you were able to ask him to explain himself, and he quickly took your hand into his before dragging you back to the living room, where he brought you to Seungkwan. 

Seeing the two of you approach, Seungkwan turned away from the song cover video Joshua was showing him and instead looked up at Jeonghan with his eyebrows raised.

“Seungkwan, Y/N here has to go home and I think you’re just the person to walk them there. I think you guys have a lot to talk about,” Jeonghan said energetically, and you felt your heart jump to your throat when Seungkwan turned to look at you, right into your eyes.

His eyes dilated a little as soon as his gaze met yours, and you just knew he’d felt the jolt of electricity, too.

“Do you live far?” he asked, and feeling a sudden surge of confusion wash over you, you nodded and shook your head at the same time. Seungkwan snorted, at which you felt your cheeks heat up and shook your head to clear your thoughts.

“Not that far,” you said, and got a playful nod from him.

“It’s fine, I could use a longer walk, too,” he hummed and got up from the couch.

A small smile spread to your lips, and the sight of it made him smile, too, and Jeonghan gently ushered the two of you to the door while the others laughed.

“Are you coming back?” Joshua asked Seungkwan from the couch, and after checking the time on his phone, Seungkwan shook his head.

Jeonghan, too, shook his head knowingly. “He has other things to do.”

Seungkwan threw his friend a confused look, but before he was able to ask Jeonghan what he thought he knew, you were already opening the door. “Alright, it was nice to meet you guys! See you again!”

The others replied with similar words, and after Seungkwan had gotten into the hallway and you were about to close the door, you still got a wink from Jeonghan. “Good luck.”

“Shush,” you groaned in a whisper, already feeling nervous and stressed, and took in a deep breath after closing the door.

You turned around and nearly jolted at the way Seungkwan was staring at you.

“Did you really need me to walk you home?” he asked, playfulness all over his voice and tone, and you found yourself shaking your head with an embarrassed smile on your face. He laughed. “Then why?”

“I’ll tell you when we’re walking,” you blurted, and let out the breath you hadn’t realized you were holding when Seungkwan agreed to wait.

The two of you took the elevator back down in comfortable silence, and as you stepped into the street, he looked at you curiously, waiting for you to say something.

You licked your lips slowly as you built up the courage to bring up the topic of your possibly matching soulmate tattoos, and when you spoke you did it as steadily as you could with your heart hammering in your chest. “So… I noticed you’ve been rubbing your right shoulder a lot.”

He gave you an embarrassed smile and rubbed the spot in question a little. “Yeah, I don’t know what’s happening. My tattoo’s never been like this before.”

“Jeonghan said that it’s related to being near your soulmate,” you blurted, and he stopped in his tracks. When you turned to look at him, you were met with a quirked eyebrow, and it was with a quivering smile that you turned a little and tugged down your jacket and the collar of your shirt to show him your tattoo. “Mine’s been itching a lot tonight, too.”

Seungkwan could only stare at your tattoo in silence. His heart was racing in his chest as he tried to find any differences between your tattoos, but ultimately failed. When he spoke, he sounded dazed. “They’re identical.”

“Do you… want to show me?” you asked quietly, letting go of your collar, and nervously turned back to face him properly and watched him slide his denim jacket down, after which he tugged at his collar, too, to reveal a tattoo identical to yours.

Your feelings could hardly be described with words. Your eyes watered as you stared at the tattoo with a happy smile spreading to your lips, strong waves of disbelief, relief, serenity and gratitude washing over you.

When Seungkwan turned to look into your eyes, you could see his eyes glistening under the street lights, too. “I never thought I’d meet you like this.”

Nodding silently, you bit down on the inside of your lower lip and swallowed your tears when you felt his hand shyly reaching for yours, which only seemed to make you more emotional.

Chuckling softly, Seungkwan gave you an amused look despite being emotional, too. “Do you want a hug, maybe?”

You hadn’t exactly ever hugged someone you’d just met nor had you wanted to, but Seungkwan wasn’t just anyone and you were feeling the most vulnerable you ever had, and so you found yourself nodding, stepping closer and wrapping your arms around him loosely as you hid your face in his shoulder.

He slowly wrapped his arms around you, too, and you felt his nose on the side of your head as he embraced you. You could almost feel how fast his heart was beating, and it made you laugh, after which you sniffled quietly.

The two of you stood there hugging one another for a good two minutes before pulling apart, feeling overwhelmed, to say the least, and Seungkwan smiled at you warmly while you wiped your cheeks with your sleeves. “Do you want to grab something to drink and just… go somewhere more peaceful?”

“I’d love that,” you said, looking into his eyes with a sense of security settling into your heart, and walked with him to the nearest cafe with your knuckles brushing against each other’s every now and then.

Only after you had gotten your drinks and left the cafe did you dare to reach for his hand and hold it, looking at him from the corner of your eye to make sure it was okay. When you saw Seungkwan’s lips curve into a smile you concluded that it probably was, and so you walked to a small park that was pleasantly quiet at that time of the evening.

You found yourselves a bench by the path and settled there comfortably, facing each other with your cups on the bench between the two of you as you started to get to know each other, all the way from the basics - how old you were, where you studied, what your families were like and so forth.

It didn’t take long for both of you to feel like you were hanging out with someone you had known for a while already, and the playful teasing came more or less naturally for both of you.

The past five years you had been thinking about what your soulmate would be like, and now that you had met him, you were over the moon. If not perfect, at least he seemed promising.

He made you laugh, he read you well, he had good manners and seemed to vibe well with you, on top of which you did find him incredibly attractive, to the point where it made you a bit stressed. 

All in all your worries faded away as hours passed and you and Seungkwan talked about everything that came to mind. Neither of you really wanted to part ways, but when you yawned for the fifth time in a short period of time, Seungkwan chuckled softly.

“Should I now walk you home?” he asked playfully and grazed the back of your hand lightly with his finger.

Giving him a tired smile, you nodded and looked into his eyes. “I think that’s a good idea.”

With that the two of you left the park, and after disposing your cups you reached for his hand, which you held onto during the walk to your place. He smiled when he noticed his heart flutter a little at that, and you, in turn, smiled when you felt him squeeze your hand.

You walked while continuing the excited chatter, and once you reached your building, Seungkwan pouted and looked at you, at that point holding your pinky finger with his. “Do you want to meet again at some point?”

“At some point?” you asked with a grin and laughed heartily. “We’re soulmates, I’d love to meet you again, whenever you have time. Preferably soon. I’m free tomorrow.”

He laughed at your obvious excitement and looked at you warmly. “I’ve got nothing tomorrow, either. And you’re sure it’s not too soon?”

“I think we’ve waited enough,” you said softly and took a step closer to him. “Meeting again so soon doesn’t have to mean we won’t take it slow.”

“Alright,” Seungkwan nodded, and after he let go of your pinky finger you felt him place his hand lightly on your back. “So… dinner?”

“Why not lunch?” you asked playfully, knowing full well why, and laughed when he looked at you with that look.

“Well, first of all, we just spent five hours talking in the park, it’s three in the morning and I need my sleep,” he listed and laughed afterwards. Then his gaze softened again. “And I think dinner will take longer, which means we get to talk more.”

“You’ve got a point,” you grinned and nodded and leaned in for a hug, during which you inhaled his scent that already felt comfortable and all kinds of pleasant to you. “I’ll see you tomorrow. And please let me know when you get home.”

“I will,” Seungkwan said quietly and hugged you with a serene smile on his lips.

Soon you were standing in the hallway, watching him walk away as warmth took over your chest. 

A back covered by a denim jacket had never looked so good, and the message you got next made you smile more than most.

”I know you’re still there. Please go up and get comfortable. 😙”

Admin Scooter

[ofjeremy-blog]

╰☆╮ FRANCISCO LACHOWSKI ─ JEREMY CHAVEZ identifies as CIS MALE and uses HE/HIM pronouns. they’re a MODEL/ACTOR, and they’re only TWENTY FOUR ! they’re said to be +CHARMING, but also -REMORSELESS. i guess that’s why they’re known as THE PARADOX in the tabloids.

i’d like to start off by saying thank u for opening this shit post! my name is ellie and it’s too cheesy to say you’re watching disney channel so! can’t say that! anyways i’ve been dying to use chico for 10 years and just never did and saw this rp in the tags and was like? o? and now im here! ive been dying to use chico for 10 years but do i know how im playing him or wtvr? nope! but i’m still here please still tolerate me thank u xx 

background info

born n raised in manhattan! 

comes from old portuguese money. his family has always been rich and i’ve just now decided that it’s because they migrated from brazil and started some company like? or maybe they were investors who invested in hella shit and that’s how they kept their money. the chavez family are old money investors and i’m adding in socialite to that. the mom could have a skincare business that’s successful too we’ll go w that. 

doesnt know what it’s like to struggle he was given everything he ever wanted and kinda knew what humble meant but it was only because of kendrick lamar telling him to be sit down n be humble 

he grew up going to some rich elite private school and were his grades ugly? i mean lowkey but did he give a shit? no bc again he doesnt know the meaning of struggling and he knew his parents could just pay off whatever the fuck he did so i mean? to him? school was a time for socialization and he wasnt really into studying he kinda just went bc all his friends did u feel 

he didnt try much in school but he was also a good guy during this point. he was friendly n didnt know the meaning of being humble  and also used his money to his advantage  but he was still a good guy at this point u kno like. think of joey from friends i have that inspo for him u know? like goofy, into flirting w the ladies, etc. kinda ditzy but he’s hot and 6′3″so i mean? 

anyways he fucked around in high school but then junior year maybe he got a steady girlfriend that actually lasted after the short lived relationships he had to lasted at most 2 weeks. he fell in LOVE love w this girl and they were together n couldve been that cute couple u kno

jere was WHIPPED whipped, but then something happened and they broke up n that shit hurted

like most boys who get their heart shattered, jere never learned how to recover and instead started playing w girls n shit. he decided to bleed onto others instead of patching up his own wound and now hes a hurt dumbass who hurts others thinkin it’ll help him (it doesnt! surprise! wish men knew that!) and like. literally trembles when commitment is mentioned or even asked of him like? 

commitment? ded dont kno them 

anyways since he wasnt booksmart and didnt give a shit about high school, he didnt go to college (his dad hated that shit and the mom didnt really give a shit. she was a socialite n cared for appearances and he was an investor who wanted a smart son but jere said fuck his dad wanting brains 4 him n listened to his mom when she said appearance is key

he started modeling and is now slowly getting into acting. he hasnt done  much big acting roles but im gonna say hes been guest starring on hella shit n getting recurring/minor roles for now

thats it for background info! 

personality info

so! like in the background when i mentioned his heart hurted after being dumped end of senior year he started playing woman and was no longer the whipped sappy hopeless romantic that he used to be! 

he’s still a nice guy, but his intentions w girls r just for the fuck n no commitment. he’s like the three sisters in hercules. he sees string n goes snip snip 

 idk why im calling him the paradox but ! for him he like appears to be a good guy and he is to an extent (hes kinda like joey but like a more successful actor kinda with a shittier personality) but like hes the big bad wolf when hes not trying to act like an innocent grandma

he’ll b upfront w girls n tell them that hes not looking  for anything serious but then he’ll play them up and be really good to them and literally just string them along and then go in for  the kill when he knows theyre hooked n then he’ll place the blame on the girl/boy/wtvr by saying “i told u in the beginning i dont want anything more.  this is on u” like that type of bullshit u feel

basically like in the quote he acts all innocent but in reality hes a shit head who looks like a good guy but hes really not n its all bc he got hurt ONCE (literally once) and then decided he didnt need 2 b careful or consider w others hearts. 

men r disgusting sometimes 

and thats basically jere! 

his personality is heavily like joey but when it comes to girls he plays them like the quote says! he looks like a golden boy but really hes like that ugly brown after uve mixed all the colors 

and thats it! 

connection ideas

the highschool sweetheart that broke his heart. she doesnt have to be the same age as him, but would have lived in manhattan during their high school years and it wouldve happened during his junior and ended during the end or even like mid end of his senior year! 

since he’s joey it’d b cool to have a chandler! give me that shit fuckin’ love brotps bro

maybe a brother/sister like relationship? some sibling type of relationship? im gonna say he had an older sister and an older brother but hes not that close w them bc the age gap being 4+ years (not small but hes dumb) 

for him it’d b cool to have unrequited crushes! fwb! one night stands gone wrong or ended beautifully! anything like that the more the merrier for him he loves things that gives n can receive pleasure xx

brotps!!!! love brotps so much give me any brotps im literally the biggest slut for brotps always 

enemies would b legit?? maybe they just dont like him bc hes a dumb ass who doesnt kno how to be humble or bc hes just a dumb rich boy?? maybe he fucked w their significant other n cheated or something?? maybe he played w their hearts n pulled the “i told u i dont do commitment” bullshit n strung them along n now they hate him? enemies r legit we love that shit too

and thats its! 

basically any plots im down for jere is kinda just out there hes just living his life we love connections n if u dont wanna plot then! thats ok too we can just go w the flow n decide on the spot when a reply happens or something u know! if u do wanna plot tho then u can message me on the side or like this post or reply to  this post n ill come to u and u know anything ya! thank u 4 reading this shit post if u got this far u really r the real deal love u thank u

[ramenfallsbutnotudon]

Twirling Around Earth’s Minerals – a (short) Erik Killmonger Fanfic

Twirling Around Earth’s Minerals – a (short) Erik Killmonger Fanfic (w/ some slightly added smut lol)

Word Count: About 2,300 words.

TW: Slight inclinations of co-dependency, murder/killing trigger, mind games, mental illness and depression. Sexual undertones. Not outright smut…

Possibly one shot? Idk lol

Synopsis: It’d been a few days since you (the reader) and Erik had really spoken. You hadn’t been fighting, but you hadn’t been really ‘connected’ either. There’s a lot of unsaid words hanging in the air, and a bit of sexual tension. You decide to break the tension by talking about rocks and Earth’s Minerals. Yes…that’s right. Minerals found deep within the Earth’s surface. And your feelings about Erik…

I seen a post here a while ago on Tumblr about a writing prompt generator. One of them was “Your character is prone to hair-twiddling when bored.” I meant to write a descriptive exercise with Erik twirling his hair but it turned into some philosophical bullshit and an (attempt) at exploring his psyche and whoever chooses to be in a relationship with him. I shouldn’t even post this. This is in the same universe as my [other fic]. So basically following the canon BP storyline this is a few months (or maybe more) before he goes to London.

If anyone wants to send me writing prompts, please do. I don’t think I can do T’Challa (I can’t relate to him/kind of dislike his character), but I can definitely do Erik and/or M’Baku. If the character is complicated & “messy”, it is a go…

-Ramenfallsbutnotudon

(Writing music this time was just “Focus” by H.E.R. on repeat. Then “Hallucinations” by dvsn towards the end. Hence the slight sexual undertones…)

I don’t know why he does that…

Erik was sitting across from you beneath a window, the light catching in his hair. A deep reddish tint cast his dreads with light golden undertones. His baby hairs were unkempt and his hair was due to be re twisted soon. Erik sat listless; twiddling his locs absentmindedly – deep in thought about something that seemed far off. He was here physically, but his presence was nowhere to be found. It’s strange, isn’t it? How a living breathing human being could be less than a yard away from you, but you suddenly feel all alone.

He’d been moody all morning. He was always moody. Or maybe you had just been too cheerful these days. You liked looking at the way the light reflected off of his skin. It was a beautiful chestnut brown color when the sun shone on it.  The shadows cast mahogany undertones. Or maybe Sienna would be a better way to describe it. He reminds me of minerals deep in the earth. Hard to find, but precious and valuable once they come to light. But the earth buried so many secrets. So many things that could take ions and innumerable centuries to recover. Darkness breeds secrets and harbors things only those in those circumstances would understand. That is Erik. That is how he is when he is like this. I don’t know if I am the crane pulling him from the dark place, or another lost gem hidden amongst the dirt. Something that was here all along but is treated as foreign and alien – yet prized for its beauty and uniqueness.

Erik was sprawled out sideways in a purple armchair. His legs dangled and danced over an arm rest anxiously. You thought the armchair was kind of gaudy but he said he was “feeling it” when he seen it online. It had a very wide back and looked like some shit you’d see out of The Jetsons.

Some futuristic shit.

On the flip side, maybe it looked a bit like the wicker chair from that iconic Huey P. Newton photograph that hung in Erik’s room for years. Erik had always been into photography and all that other artistic shit. He loved going to indie photo exhibitions wearing glasses with a coffee in his hand. He always choose a different small Black-Owned business to support each time. Of course though, he didn’t always return. Sometimes the coffee was just that shitty despite his need to support it. You tried them along with him. However, your tastes sometimes didn’t match. He liked bitter coffee with a tiny drop of sugar and hardly any milk or cream. You liked too much milk and cream and even sugar. Sometimes it was just like that, loving someone who purposefully drank bitter things. Someone who didn’t want sweet things all the time because he knew that life wasn’t always sweet.

You stand up and slowly saunter over to him. Not in a provocative way, but in an airy almost dreamlike state. You didn’t know why, but you always felt a bit nervous around him. He didn’t scare you or intimidate you. You knew he’d never harm you…he was just too damn unpredictable. Not in an “I-am-walking-on-eggshells-because-my-partner-is-a-loose-cannon” type of way, but an “I-want-him-to-open-up-to-me/don’t-spook-the-deer” type of way. Is that even a thing, “don’t spook the deer”? I don’t think people would even think he was a deer. They’d think he was the jaguar. After all, he does have golden fangs.

But it’s true – he is a bit of both. But how can one be the predator and prey? Can a person be two people at the same time – two shifting dynamics melding into one?

Maybe it is the issue of the outward appearance vs the inward self. Erik has this bravado about him – like he’s Robin Hood or the Hood’s Daddy or some shit but other times he just seems scared. Unsure of himself and his actions. I don’t even think he notices that sometimes when he’s trying to be guarded – he’s completely transparent.

You lower your body down and rest its weight on your hind legs. Crouching in front of Erik’s body you tenderly caress his leg.

“Erik?”

He shuddered before turning his head to acknowledge you. In one swoop he lifted both of his legs and rested them between your frame. His boots made a light thud as his feet touched the wooden floor.

You look up at him and slide to your knees.  You felt like his eyes were looking right through you. They were dark, like newly formed chunks of obsidian after a volcanic eruption.  His eyelids seemed heavy, like he’d been up all night. Thinking back, you weren’t even sure if he slept fully the entire night or just lay silently next to you so you wouldn’t worry. There were so many little things you seemed to miss about him, and others were as apparent as the day was long. But then again, even the days take a break in winter and let the darkness yield over. Erik seemed like winter and fall and you felt like the spring. You met in summer and since you were spring you could handle the temperatures of fall. But not winter. It was a bit too cold and dark for you but he seemed to thrive in it. He pursed his lips before letting a smile break over his face.

“Hey, Princess” he said in a husky voice.

“Princess? When did I get that upgrade?”

His smiled seemed to fade a bit. You only meant to tease him.

“It’s always been yours. Just because I never said it, doesn’t mean I never thought it.”

You rose to your feet and looked down at him. He followed your body up and gazed wistfully at your stature now towering over him. His eyes then traveled down past your breast and to your navel. He leaned in and let his forehead rest on your womb.

“Hey…” you started, unsure of how to start the conversation you’d been having in your head for the last half hour.

“Hmm?”

You felt the vibrations of his voice mix with the rhythms of your body. Your heart beat. You felt your palms start to get clammy.  

On a seemingly queue, Erik reached for your hands and encircled his arms around your hips.

“I’m-I’m sweaty”

“I don’t care” his muffled voice indicated coolly.

You felt the weight of his head and the warmth of his body. It felt nice. Just standing here, in this moment.  You looked around his apartment. The living room was a bit bare, but there was an abundance of natural light. You watched dust particles lightly dance in a breeze coming in from an open window. He didn’t seem to enjoy being alone at home much. He mainly stayed at your place often…that is when he wasn’t out of the country or “on a mission”.

Your head started to throb at that word. Mission. You hated when he left. But you understood that he needed to find closure, even if his way meant sometimes killing people.

Erik kills people, but I still love him. What type of person does that make me?

You hold onto his arms. The grip in his biceps are tense.

Does he expect me to let go?

You decide to move closer, your heart beating out of your chest. You slide down onto his lap and position yourself in the sideways manor he was initially sitting. He exhales deeply and shifts himself in the chair. You feel a growing bulge between his legs. You angle your bottom over it sideways and smile at him. He beams back at you before attempting to kiss you. You turn away and let his lips brush against your cheek instead. A confused look passes his face for an instant before he sags his shoulders and reclines back in the chair.

You instantly feel bad.

Back to square one now.

You shift in the chair again and you see him close his eyes. He inhales deeply; you rest your head on his shoulder.

“You teasing me today, huh?” he says in a gruff voice.

He sounded frustrated, but you didn’t feel like it was about that.

“No” you chime innocently, reaching a hand over his face to stroke his bristly beard. He needed a shave as well, he’d been in a mood the past three days and hadn’t really done much. Then again, you were on a five day old wash n go so you couldn’t really fault him there. Maybe both of you were in your feelings, and not talking about it had made things worse.

But despite the tension hanging in the air, it didn’t feel uncomfortable. It just felt like you were vibing on each other’s energy, waiting for the other to make the first move; Afraid of saying the wrong thing and creating an environment that takes a turn for the worst.

He closed his eyes and you reached your face down to his lips. His breathing stopped in anticipation for a kiss. You licked his lips like a cat and his eyes flung open before smiling.

“What was that?” he asked, now starting to giggle. His eyes lit up with a brightness that reminded you of metallic stones.

You put up a hand and curl it into a paw.

“Meow” you say while patting the paw across his chest.

Your eyes meet and you both burst into laughter. He wraps his arms around you and you kiss his forehead. He then leans up to kiss yours.

Maybe now.

“If we were stones, what type do you think we’d be?”

He holds your gaze for longer than usual, still smiling.

“Babe, sometimes you have some weird shit on your mind” he said before laughing again.

“Here I thought you were mad at me for some shit I couldn’t think of-“

“-I thought you were mad at me?”

The corner of his mouth twitched. He swallowed hard before trying to make himself smile again. He thought you didn’t notice, but you did. You pull away from him and he stiffens up. He readjusts himself to sit up straight, the swell in his pants semi-stiff.

“Erik” your voice begins to crack “what is going on with you lately?”

Erik looks away from you and over his right shoulder. He licks his lips. You felt him grow hard beneath you. You raised your eyebrow.

“So you noticed….I guess I have been acting out of pocket, huh?” he said in a clearly forced calm voice.

I guess he thought that was convincing. His breathing is uneven. Maybe I shouldn’t say anything.

He lifted his shirt up over his head and took it off. There were shadows cast on his scars. You also noticed that there was a fresh black and blue mark on his shoulder blade.

“Erik…when did…” you tried to begin but were at a loss for words. He always at least hinted at when something like this happened. You had no idea. Had he hid it from you? Were you not paying attention?

“It’s two, actually…” he let his voice trail off after looking at your horrified face.

His eyes looked distant. He lowered them and nodded his head as he looked at something far away on the floor. His brows were scrunched together. His nostrils were flared. You could feel his heart beating in his chest. Fluttering, like butterfly wings.

You breathe in.

“…you…” you look into his eyes and he looks away. You grab his face. “When-?” your voice sounded breathless.

“A few days ago” he affirmed nonchalantly. Erik began to pick at the lining in the chair.

How could he be so callous about this?

You wanted to ask details but decided that maybe you didn’t want to know. You lay your head back on his shoulder and kiss his neck. He wasn’t hard anymore. You were happy about that.

He didn’t disgust you, you just didn’t understand him sometimes. Or understand the secrets he harbored deep within himself. You weren’t afraid of his truths, but rather his lies. Lies were capable of doing more harm than any truth could. At least that had always been your experience.

He closed his eyes and let you kiss his neck. You started to use your tongue, leaving wet marks across his skin. He shifted in the chair and let out a stifled moan. You moved up to his collar bone and left marks with your teeth. He wraps his hands around your body and picks you up to push you against the nearest wall. You both smile and you laugh as he goes up your neck with his lips. They feel soft and springy across your body. Like they are soaking up any doubts you held deep in your heart. You looked at him and caught his eye before closing yours again. He seemed troubled. The image burned in your mind as he slid off your clothes while cradling you in his arms. You tried undoing his clothing. He slammed you back into the wall hard and broke off a kiss to ask if you were alright. You held his face and nodded yes. Slowly, he slipped inside of you.

Obsidian and Praseodymium. That’s what we’d be. One was born from volcanic eruptions, the other a rare mineral found in the Earth’s crust. One is used to make tools for cutting but is brittle. The other is only completely stable in water. It has to be submerged to survive. Maybe that’s why I like him so much. He was born in waters only I can thrive in.

Obsidian and Praseodymium.

A/N: About the slight co-dependency…I was trying to target emotionally destructive behavior. I added this in because I think Killmonger would definitely exhibit some of this in his personality. Like yeah he’s confident and swaggering and sexy but he wouldn’t be like that 24/7 – or when he was alone with his thoughts. Also…I don’t know him personally or whatever – but it seems like MBJ might have a bit of this in his personality as well. I basically searched through his entire Instagram because I had an idea for another fic, and some of his posts seem kind of…lonely? Especially that “lost files” shit from 2016 and then posts after Black Panther he seems like a totally different dude. No more videos, cutesy photos, photos with actual friends…Which is understandable but at the same time it’s kind of like…dude what happened? It’s a visible shift. Then the whole lowkey thottie thing and Saweetie’s song 23 that talks about how he was really hung up on their last conversation then fucked her brains out in broad daylight…speeding down the highway high and she said they could have fucking died…I mean again I will probably never meet that man but if he hides his personal life and shit like this can be interpreted by the low-key actions we do hear about him? Unless I’m just projecting Lol, I fucking could be…

Really been in my feelings lately and it won’t go away, so I may as well milk it until I return back to “normal”. I’m also trying to decide on the journey to the ending for the last smut piece I wanna write that has now turned from a one-shot to a trilogy in my head lmao.

I also referenced photos of him as killmonger and one photo with that coon Donald Glover at the Met GALA on his Instagram for tone descriptions. That one has some weird lighting but it’s in line with what I was imagining lol. I wish I was better at describing skin tones, or more confident with it I should say.