#waterloo (1970)

[clove-pinks]

Thinking about Them... (the British soldiers in Waterloo 1970)

"This... this plunder acquired me, sir!"

"You know the penalty for plundering, sir?"

"Stoppage of gin, sir?"

"Damn you, sir! It's death!"

[diagnosed-anxiety-disorder]

Took matters into my own hands and made a Waterloo 1970 Marshal Ney fancam to Waterloo by ABBA! This took like 5 hours to make so please enjoy!

uhhh *cough* hit that like button and smash the subscribe button and comment what you think 👍

[confusedbyinterface]

I just watched Waterloo, and given the critique that Ridley Scott gives Napoleon RTS powers, its interesting how Waterloo uses the realities of command and communication for dramatic effect.

The charge of the Union Brigade is a great example.

At 2:50 in the video, the French lancers are charging out to attack the Scots Greys. Wellington and Uxbridge see them, and realising the Scots Greys are in danger Uxbridge orders their retreat. The trumpeter sounds the order but they can't hear him. He keeps playing over and over as Wellington gets more anxious until he finally shouts for him to stop, knowing there's no way to save Ponsonby and his men now.

Napoleon and Wellington can't just magically make people do what they want, they have to actually tell them. Their officers have their own opinions and talk back, or are already too far to be reached, or like Grouchy were given very clear orders by you and have no way of knowing you changed your mind until they get a letter too late to make any difference. There's tension and drama in that, and if Ridley Scott ignored it it's a real missed opportunity.

[gabrielferaud]

this scene is funny, the way they shoehorn quotes into this movie is so odd; still the best napoleonic movie ever

[aquitainequeen]

Waterloo - I did not usurp the crown

[cadmusfly]

wanted to watch a tiny bit more of waterloo 1970 and was suspecting that the novelisation is probably based on a first draft script, because they used to do that with tie-in novels in order to release them at the same time, didn't they, so looked at the novel some more

ney you don't have to sound more like a jilted lover than you already did you know (and this small bit isn't in the film) (also not in the film is napoleon calling ney a whore under his breath)

see even soult "craves" to see a naked napoleon

soult even got um "drenched".

hot bathtub action

also when ney and soult leave the king and soult leaves naked napoleon in the film, they click their boots together in a presumably military style which is kinda cheesy but cute before they leave the room

is that a real thing? from a quick google it seems to be a prussian military thing about leaving the presence of a higher up that was adopted by the nazis (oh no, i take back the cute) which might explain why it fell out of fashion, but quick google also claims it started in 1871

[proosh]

this is pruk at waterloo. to me.

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

we discussed why Ridley Scott's film is unlikely to be the way we would like it to be

so I have a question: what films/series about Napoleon more or less correctly represent real history? or just good in your opinion

oh man, I'm a bit of a picky person when it comes to Napoleonic films/series, but not in a logically consistent manner so people get a little confused sometimes. Which is fair.

I'll give you two rec's:

My favourite Napoleon movie is Monsieur N. I think what makes it work is that it's a historical AU, basically, and fills all my favourite tropes. Premise is that Napoleon, through a weird magic (?) thing, switches fates with his valet/spy Cipriani and manages to escape St. Helena.

As one can guess, it's only loosely, loosely based in history. The ages of some people are altered (Betsy Balcombe is aged up significantly so she can be an appropriate love interest for Napoleon; Barry O'Meara is in his late thirties/early forties for no apparent reason etc.). I feel like Albine got shafted in being cast as a bit of the Conniving Courtesan. Montholon is positioned as a poisoner, even though by the time the film was made that theory/story had been pretty heavily debunked. They omit Napoleon's crap treatment of Fanny Bertrand after she rebuffed his advances. Napoleon's still played too seriously - but that's a fault in literally almost every production ever.

That said, I love Bertrand in this. Gourgaud makes a rogue appearance and is suitably chaotic. I like Sir Hudson Lowe as well - I feel that Richard Grant was cast perfectly. The visuals are beautiful. It's just gorgeously filmed (I love the first confrontation/meet scene between Napoleon and Lowe - the playing with light, the choice of clothes, the switching through languages etc. it's masterful).

The historical inaccuracy aside, I actually liked the relationship between Napoleon and Betsy. I'm just like "clearly it's another Betsy Balcombe. Funny that two people have the same name on this small island!"

(Obviously, in reality, she was a literal child when she knew Napoleon. He was an uncle/older brother figure to her and she was clearly a surrogate daughter/niece to him. They pranked each other and teamed up to prank Lowe on the regular alongside playing silly games and mucking about.)

I love that it's a multi-lingual production so you have English, French and Corsican being spoken, as appropriate for the characters/people. The sound track is fitting. It's appropriately atmospheric.

So yeah, I am very fond of the film. But it's just a fun, stupid romp.

You can't go in expecting a Real Historical And/Or Accurate Account of Napoleon on St. Helena. Thankfully, the film never positions itself as such a thing. It's very clearly a What If + Fanfiction. I recommend going in and treating it like a slightly more serious Knight's Tale in its approach to history (vibes & essence over facts). If you do that, you'll have a blast. If you go in looking for Historical Napoleon or whatever, you'll hate it.

I also may or may not have a Thing for Philippe Torreton (who plays Napoleon). So. That might also inform my affection for this dumb film.

-----

I remember enjoying the 2002 French miniseries Napoleon (with Christian Clavier and Isabella Rossellini). As with all series and films, it has its issues (there are definite inaccuracies), but I liked it overall. I feel they hit the emotional beats between Napoleon and Josephine really well.

(While she's not older than him in it, at least the actors the same age and she's not like 16 years younger than Napoleon /eye roll.)

The scene when she reams him out during their divorce is powerful (she does this great thing about how he always wanted to make it clear that he's separate from the ancien regime and Not Like Those People but what is he doing now? He's marrying one of Marie Antoinette's relatives. And like, she is calling him out for his political inconsistency, and making the point that it's a bad decision in terms of Optics, but it's also so clearly much more than that. It's well done). Napoleon's reaction when he learns that she's died is heart breaking and well rendered/believable.

There is also humour and convivial moments that are often lacking in historical biopics with him, which I appreciate (love the "you need to take the Austrian uniform off the scarecrow or we'll have an International Incident on our hands" scene).

There's a rogue Coulaincourt who makes an appearance! Nice to see him. Same with Lannes - glad he makes an appearance. Though there's no Duroc or Junot, unfortunately. (Granted, I understand the need to keep the cast to a reasonable amount of people.)

So yeah, it's an entertaining series. It's a bit of a "classic" in the sense that I feel like anyone who has gone through a Napoleon Phase watches it.

----

Truly, the best representation of Napoleon is in Bill and Ted's Most Excellent Adventure. You're welcome.

----

I hope this helps!

[misterivy]

From December 1970 PHOTOPLAY FILM MONTHLY

[another-clayres]

Sinking

Kairi and Naminé as sirens for Mermay (roughly based on their KH II appearances, with some artistic liberties taken).

[illustraction]

WATERLOO (1970) - NAPOLEON IN MOVIES (Part 10/10)

We end this Napoleonic era movie tribute with another Russian epic directed by Sergei Bondarchuk (see Part 2) focusing on Napoleon's final battle and ultimate defeat against the combined armies of the Alliance (Russia, Prussia and England) in Belgium.

An all-star affair with a moody Rod Steiger as Napoleon, it is a marvelous spectacle to watch showing that once more Russian Cinema had nothing to envy to Hollywood in terms of scales.

Above are posters from Italy and Japan printed for the original releases of the movie (Click on each image for details).

Director: Sergei Bondarchuk Actors: Rod Steiger, Christopher Plummer, Orson Welles

ALL OUR NAPOLEON MOVIE POSTERS ARE HERE

If you like this entry, check the other 9 parts of this week’s Blog as well as our Blog Archives

All our NEW POSTERS are here All our ON SALE posters are here

The posters above courtesy of ILLUSTRACTION GALLERY

[clove-pinks]

It's not too late to watch it! The tagline makes this sound like even more of a meet-cute. One incredible afternoon, Napoleon met Wellington ...aww!

[phatburd]

🔥 🔥 🔥

[gaykarstaagforever]

ABBA is the last band I hated as an angry youth that I still don't like as an angry adult. Being mad at media is a waste of energy when there are plenty of important things to be mad about, so I've been trying to find at least one ABBA song that I can say, without hesitation, is good.

I found one. "Waterloo".

The English version is okay enough. But for some reason their native Swedish one is better. Slightly less "everything at 11" production compared to the English one, or, if that's just my ears being weird, maybe it's just more straight cheeseball Europop in Swedish so I can make more room for it in my life.

The premise of it is a little awkward, though. I mean, there are weirder metaphors than "surrender to love like Napolean surrendered at Waterloo."

But also, like...Napoleon did not in fact surrender at Waterloo.

And like 50,000 people died.

But this was the 70s so it wasn't like you could just Google it before you wrote your Motown-influenced blue-eyed disco whatever.

Plus, compared to other ABBA songs, these lyrics are fine. Mostly because no sexy children are mentioned.

A topic for another time, perhaps.

Here is an interesting acoustic cover by TheMoonLoungers in 2021 that interprets the lyrics in a slightly less joyful way.

Like this is the "original" version from the musical, that got popular because most people don't think about the lyrics. Or remember how in that scene, she was locked in a tower by the lord who killed her brother, and had to consent to marry him or he'd kill her father too.

...Yeah so there is also another weird potential subtext going on here.

And this is the ABBA song I LIKE!

[unsortedmess]

Say what you will, but Goncharov (1973) is easily the best film collaboration between Italy & the Soviet Union from that period.

[proosh]

"Averse to all forms of cowardice?" I'm actually convinced you have no idea who you're talking about. One of France's defining character traits is that he's a coward. You sound like a fake fan.

Anon, and anyone else who's reading this, look. I'm really sorry for the tone the rest of this reply is about to take. You see, I'm someone who's very much about curating one's personal internet experience, and an advocate for mutual respect and sensibility in regards to fandom matters. I'm all about encouraging differing interpretations and analyses of characters, even if I don't necessarily agree or understand it's all a matter of perspective and if I'm not a fan of something? I ignore it, simple. I likewise expect the same sort of understanding from other participants in fandom: If I am posting things that is not to someone's taste, they can simply ignore me or block me to curate their personal online experience. You know, like civil people within a public forum.

However, you've decided to come to my inbox, on this wretched day after I have just been subjected to two and a half hours of the worst Napoleonic cinema experience the human mind can possibly conjure, to tell me that I am a "fake fan" over a silly little shitpost? Are you on crack? Is it crack you're smoking? Because, my good bitch, you will find it is you who is the fake fan.

For example, we've got literal direct canonical evidence of France being, like, incredibly and unfathomably enthusiastic about the idea of getting to go to war with the English again, specifically saying that being at peace feels like he's been "crammed into a fake version" of himself. I'm sorry, it really doesn't get more explicit than that. Look, it's not a headcanon I believe in, but that's okay. You do you! I'm happy for whatever interpretation you have! I will not be the one sending pissy little anons about it, I promise! You're welcome to block me if this is something that is incompatible with your fandom experience! Go for it! Please!

But, sure, maybe direct canon depiction isn't enough to defend the thought process as to my personal interpretation. I'll put this under the cut since I'm invariably getting long-winded, but let's have a quick fun lightning-round overview of French history and culture in regards to their collective bloodthirst and warmongering that doesn't really lend itself to an interpretation of 'cowardice' as a concept that's strongly represented within the French national identity (at least in my opinion);

The French have, for about a thousand-odd years, been heavily associated with an unusually bellicose, honour-bound, chivalric, warmongering ideal, to the point their ongoing national anthem is quite literally about murdering people and watering the fields with blood!

Historian Niall Ferguson argues that France is the most belligerent military power in history!

Literally over a million men were fed into the meat grinder of World War One! Literally an entire generation! Approaching 5% of the entire population!

One of the last bayonet charges in history was performed by the French! In 1995!

Their ongoing nuclear doctrine is one of the pants-shitteningly insane ones on the planet, and scared the piss out of the Soviets - Which is to say, they will happily drop a nuclear weapon on an enemy city as a warning shot! And they'll do it, too, because they keep refusing to sign nuclear arms treaties!

Their population is entirely and consistently prepared and ready to implode their own country and governance at the first sign of any infringement upon perceived civil and social liberties!

If you've read this far, anon, congratulations! I hope you can better understand the reason why I interpret France the way I do! If you disagree with me, you're welcome to come off anon and meet me at the Champs-Élysées at dawn so we can duel to the death over our incompatible opinions like true respectable gentlepeople of honour and class. Or you can just block me and not bother me again.

It's totally up to you, buddy!