#we love a bitch who haunts the narrative-

[unmerrymagdalene]

Actually you know what, I’m not gonna wait until the poll finishes because you cannot convince me that Sydney and Sirris have a fully good parental relationship-

This isn’t me saying their relationship is fully bad obvi! It’s clear that Sirris cares for Sydney and their well being, but like-

Sirris is openly sex positive to a debatably obsessive(?) intense degree. Sydney, at the start of the game, is not. Sydney works at the shop, despite the fact they’re openly embarrassed by everything. Sydney goes to the Temple routinely, while Sirris just drops them off and barely steps foot inside. Sirris does have some reservations about the Temple and hey, and it’s also the same place where their late partner/Sydney’s other parent was mainly at, which is a whole can of worms that is never overtly talked about.

They clearly love each other, but they (probably) do not talk about stuff beyond a surface level. They’re both treading on very thin ice. What the fuck is going on with them-

[visenlya]

we love a bad bitch who haunt the narrative. the way tamlin stay rent free in them IC losers’ mind. he doesn’t even do anything yet he be staying in their businesses 😭

[lazycranberrydoodles]

COME ON GUYS DON'T LET DIANXIA DOWN

[least-carpet]

What do you like about jc? Why he is your favorite?

Anon, this has been sitting in my inbox because I was afraid to open this can of worms. I've rotated this character nonstop for, like, the past three years. I got on Tumblr because of this character. I'm not even that wild about MDZS as a novel! I'm a SVSSS main! I don't know how I ended up here!

He loves his nephew so much. I love what we get about Jiang Cheng's relationship with Jin Ling, who had what was probably an indescribably weird childhood, but who has never once thought to himself that his uncle didn't love him. Jin Ling is evidently spoiled and rude but also so genuinely courageous, forgiving, and loving in his horrible teenage way. I love these two and they love each other!

He's dutiful. I think people sometimes think of duty as a burden, and obviously it can be, but I also think of it as an expression of care towards others. He sincerely cares about his responsibilities, which include all of the people who joined the Jiang sect to follow him.

He's supremely competent. We see the poor guy fail a lot, but he restored a massacred sect to Great Sect status in 13-15 years with what seems like no familial support and no apparent close external connections. He must be really, really good at his job.

He's such a bitch. He's here to make things hard and unpleasant on purpose! He's witty and will say the meanest possible thing he can think of in a fight! Just like his mother, he can sense your insecurities like a bloodhound and tear into them at will! I think this is a good and endearing quality (for a character, obviously).

He is profoundly screwed by the narrative. Dude is, as @winepresswrath puts it, "ontologically cursed." He exists to fail. His creator made him the most determined little toaster and then put him in 1000 unwinnable situations. He is trapped in, like, a bespoke torment matrix, that he only really escapes at the end of canon (dignity in tatters but nephew in hand).

Killer style in CQL and maybe also the donghua from what I've seen of the gifs? Fashionable king. Deeply uncool despite the drip, which endears him to me more.

Wang Zhuocheng's crying face. Yes, it's that gif set again. It haunts my dreams.

[poisonheiress]

Vivziepop's ability to decay any women and fem-aligned characters she creates has always haunted Helluva Boss, and as a result, limits them to being one dimensional characters that fall into a "with them or against them" mentality when it comes to her male characters; they only exists to prop up other (male) characters or to serve as morally bankrupt villains.

From Verosika to Stella to Loona and Millie, this trend is clear from the beginning of the show and likely will follow it to the end. However, for this post I will discuss the recent victims of this trend: the lovely Glitz and Glam.

To be honest, I adore Glitz and Glam (to the point of writing fan fiction for them) and they have become my favorite characters in the entire show so this discussion will show some bias towards them. While some may say its too early for this call as they will be seen again, but from what I've seen on twitter from fans and even creators of their song alike, I do not have the hope this will occur.

From the beginning, Glitz and Glam are looked down on for their desire to win and for doing anything they can to get that position. When confronted with Fizz's kind words of support, they look down on him and further emphasize how they are going to win against him even gaining the title of "snatches" and "sluts" by Blitzo. From this moment forward, its clear the narrative doesn't want us to look kindly upon the sisters. After all, they are being "bitches" to Fizzarolli and competing against him in a manner that pushes him further and further into a breakdown. The fact that Fizz's relationship with Mammon and self esteem issues are not their fault is shown as irrelevant to both the audience and their creators.

This isn't made better by their song writers' commentary on twitter on how the glam sisters are perverting the true nature of clowning and that their song shows how they are simply wanting to get Mammon's attention by feeding into the financial and sexual exploitation (even saying that they want this to happen). This commentary solidifies the idea that they are not someone we should root for especially since they are allying themselves with Mammon, a horrific, abusive asshole.

While I expect this level of dismissal and honestly misogynistic writing from Helluva boss, I can't help but be extremely agitated by it and the reason why was made clear recently: the narrative acts as if the Glam sisters are doing this for out of selfish desire alone, as if they are terrorizing Fizz for no good reason. But that's simply not true, and even Vivzie's canon supports me here.

The Glam sisters are hellborn demons, only one rank higher than the imps. This means that while they may be treated better, they still are not treated as full citizens like sinners are, and in a dog eat dog world like Hell, kindness is not something they can afford.

Getting this position with Mammon is a life changing deal, something Fizz is proof of. Yes, it is as exploitative as it is lucrative for the individual, but this is Hell (as Vivzie likes to claim) and opportunities like this are something many would die and kill for.

So at the end of the day, I cannot help but be confused why the narrative punishes and looks down on Glitz and Glam for taking some crumb of control back from the system and accepting their objectification with open arms as long as they are rightly compensated for it. Why does even their (albeit catchy) song look down on them for doing whatever it takes to survive in Hell? After all, they would be exploited anyway, right? It's what Hell lives on.

In a class system like Vivzie claims to have, the glam sisters are a prime example of the kind of oppressed vs oppressed the system creates, but instead of trying to understand them or even see them as morally complex, they are simply the slutty female antagonists who are corrupting the sanctity of hell clowns simply because they don't clown for the sake of clowning. Whatever complexity they could have, even if it is beneficial to the entirety of the show, is worthless compared to their narrative propping for Vivzie's favored characters. But it doesn't surprise me. After all, what else is a women is Helluva Boss good for if not to support the main male cast.

[camelspit]

Both portraits by @camelspit

Propaganda:

Jolie Ruewen:

"my girl Jolie deserved so much better, I lover her sm she's so underrated ugh. I hope we will get to see her more in book 10" (anonymous)

"guys she literally haunts the narrative like no other. sure, prentice was kinda haunting the narrative for a few books in his schrödinger’s-dead state, but jolie has been *dead* dead since before book one, yet she feels more alive to us at times in the series than some living characters.

we know what her favorite treats were, we know she loved gremlins, we know she was scared of the dark as a kid, we know she was the life of the party, we know where her dresses and makeup were and still are decades later. we know her wedding was going to have a butterfly theme. we know she was willing to write in a diary in a secret code backwards because she needed to confess somewhere but couldn’t confess to the people she needed to. we know she loved so much it killed her and she was loved so much that part of grady and edaline and brant and maybe even vertina (A PIECE OF AI) and others died with her.

sophie never even met her, and there’s a part of her that loves jolie and thinks of her as someone safe, given the times prentice appeared as jolie and sophie went “this is a sign i’m gonna be alright”. jolie was a source of goodness so palpable that prentice feels safer taking her shape. and grady and edaline see her in sophie more than they’ll ever say out loud. sophie is a warped reflection of some of who jolie was and could’ve been.

jolie is an inspiration and a warning to all in the same breath. and it’s been almost twenty years since her last breath was full of smoke." @synonymroll648

Stina Heks:

"THE mean girl!! THE horse girl!! She's so interesting guys 🙏🙏 she is the living embodiment of the hypocrisy of elven prejudice!! she cares about her family and the world and despite her past feelings she has helped sophie!! she is a part of team valiant!! she is very slowly learning acceptance and all that while STILL being a bitch!! also shes funny." @camelspit

"she’s a mean lesbian horsegirl what’s not to love" @faggot-friday

"She could step on me and I would thank her" (anonymous)

[fizzigigsimmer]

Do you want to know what really fucked me up and got me good about Steve Harrington in S1? What I MISS SO MUCH and wish the Duffer Brothers had a clue how to tap into?

Steve was the Queen Bee. Which is hilarious because the Duffers fully set out to write him as the Jock Bully archetype but through a happy marriage of poor writing and even poorer casting (for the intended goal) they ended up with a completely different character archetype.

It was utterly fascinating to me. Because we don’t see male Queen Bees pretty much ever unless it’s part of a gag or some Very Important Point within the plot. I don’t think I’ve ever seen one who just is one, while the narrative keeps on telling you he’s the Jock Bully... when he’s so clearly not.

Don’t believe me? According to exhaustive research on archetypes.com: 🤪

Common traits of the Queen Bee = Cunning and glamorous, often materially wealthy, confident,socially ambitious, and charismatic.The recognized ruler of an academic setting. Deep inside she’s an angry girl, because she has been disappointed or seen how the world really is and has no outlet. She is in need of boundaries and guidance. Unable to deal with her emotions, she projects her anger into selfishness and protects herself from the outside world climbing the social hierarchy. The Mean Girl falls when she loses her power. Her power is always directly tied to her social status and her story ends with her no longer resting atop the social hierarchy. If we’re humanizing her, she’s a sad rich girl in need of a true friend she can be imperfect with. She may soften, but often her legacy as ‘Queen Bitch’ will continue to haunt her.

Common Traits of the Jock/Jerk Bully = an alpha male who dominates the school/college environment through physical violence and threats of brutal retaliation. Typically blond, he is rarely seen without a letter jacket or some connection to the sport he draws his self value from, as he is also typically dumb and unlikely to go far in life. If we’re humanizing this character his father is a jerk with unrealistic expectations. He has a posse of enablers who hype his excess anger and poor impulse control issues. His low levels of empathy and radar for weakness in others can be played for laughs if he is the villain of the week or border on sociopathic if he is the heroes arch nemesis.

Now don’t get me wrong. I can so clearly see how the Duffers started out writing Steve as the Jock Bully, but it’s also pretty clear that things went haywire once they fell in love with Joe. I think it’s obvious that in an effort to highlight what they liked about Joe (a sensitive artist and definitely not a Jock Bully) they lost the one trope and accidentally created the other.

So when they create Jock Bully 2.0, AKA Billy Hargrove and decide he and Steve are gonna be rivals for the school crown and ALPHAHOOD or whatever... instead you’re just left with the keen sense that these two characters are supposed to be together. Because they are.That’s the formula. And I would bet money they realized it too.

[accirax]

initial thoughts on DCAS episode 15

good job Ally... couldn't be me :,)

Alec that's incredibly dangerous you're going to CHOP OFF YOUR HAND--

oh, the sinking feeling in my chest when (approximately) this was revealed to be the thumbnail. i figured that, if Riya changed her mind and decided that she actually liked Alec, that would have been a spoiler to conceal, so this was going to be manipulation of some sort. before anyone comments on it, i just want to say that i don't think this was assault on Riya's part-- it was a shitty thing to do to both Connor and Alec, but i don't think Alec was necessarily non-consenting. still, i have a hard time seeing how Alec and Riya are supposed to cut it as a non-toxic canon ship after this. RIP Connor.

are people who are fans of ~characters who haunt the narrative~ fans of Yul?

i'm sorry Ally; i didn't know better!!! you really did have no personality in s2!!!!

... do we need to be nicer to ONC or something?

if you want to continue working with Riya and Alec why would you say this to their faces? well, i guess keeping her honest opinions to herself has never been Grett's strong suit :) (/aff)

if i'm not allowed to be a whiny bitch, YOU AREN'T EITHER! Connor and Jake's dynamic is really fun; it makes me like both of them more.

props to Jake's VA, the slight country accent here was so funny to me

very bold! even if she then decided to violate that trust...

what the fuck are you talking about

my 1 social media manager. and yes, she smokes weed.

i'm so curious to know where this is going. don't do anything stupid, Trevor. like Kristal putting the firing of Emily on national TV was a terrible thing to do, but don't go back to jail over this (or Derek).

i want to believe that Derek was super overacting here to impress Kristal and prop up how good and dramatic her challenge idea was. he's a dork when it comes down to it.

HELP

this was literally the funniest way to have Jake win this challenge. it's accurate, too.

dude did you not see when Ally literally said she was in love with Hunter like a week after meeting him

sharing a comment that @venus-is-thinking had: given that Alec answered the question about loving his son thinking that the answer was "yes" but the helmet could tell that the answer was really "no," it seems like these helmets are more about determining the truth rather than sharing what the wearer thinks is the truth. Riya even fails to fake the machine later, implying that her acting is NOT good enough to fool the helmets. thus, Riya may have actually wanted to befriend Ally for real, and is lying to herself about how she feels. food for thought!

so they DID actually go on dates after s2 ended. does Riya's answer to this question suggest that conriya(?) is back on? i really don't know if that's good for either of them.

... idk what this says about my Hunter lifting math ',:/ also, this means that each bag weighs 30 lbs, as Grett was holding 4 bags at the time. people were lifting a lot!

i think Jake is contractually obligated to pull out the shiny eyes at least once per episode at this point. also, Ally, you fool-- these questions themselves ARE Jake's opportunity to trauma dump on people for profit!

... well that was fruity!

WHO TAUGHT HIM???

Riya expanding her catalogue to push even the straights off of things... unless?

Alec really has become such a failwife in these past few episodes.

Connor winner edit jumpscare

this is kind of a slay alliance ngl. i love Grett's villainous tendencies so much. (well, at least when it comes to strategizing-- not bullying Gabby)

so, as i've been alluding to throughout these thoughts, this doesn't... super make sense to me? like, after Grett directly told Alec that she doesn't trust him or Riya anymore, and extended the idol to Connor and Jake as a sign of trust, she decides to backstab the heroes anyway and continue working with Alec and Riya? Venus explained to me that if Grett joined the villains alliance with Aiden still in the game she just would've been on the bottom of that alliance (and thus locked out of f3 probably), and that she'll be in enough of a power position that it doesn't matter if others are bitter towards her now, but idk. given that Connor has the idol and she knows it, i feel like i'd be afraid that everyone would just unite against me next episode. anyways, goodbye Aiden-- finally voted out after, what, 27 episodes played? a true all star, but one who pretty clearly wasn't going to last forever.

Aiden was so funny for this. i love their friendship of continuously roasting each other. it's what we wanted and deserved.

overall, this was a GREAT episode for Grett's winner cut.

i definitely enjoyed this episode much more than i did the last. we had a really good challenge this time around! i love challenges that also give us information as to how the contestants feel about each other. i'm also glad that we've officially dissolved the heroes and villains thing, simply having three pairs of Alec/Riya, Jake/Connor, and Ally/Grett. i'm sure that'll make for a spicy elimination next episode, especially with an idol in play. we're really at 50% finalist now... i can't wait to see who makes it!

[older-sister-death-match]

ROUND 1B MATCH 14 - REDO

MY APOLOGIES. I ACCIDENTALLY SET THE DURATION AS ONLY ONE DAY. LET'S TRY THIS AGAIN

Ava Ferin art by sakushini (twitter)

Propaganda Under The Cut:

AVA FERIN:

ava. man.... what a tragic bitch. she's been dead from the beginning of the campaign. she was in the navy, daughter of one of the vice admirals, part of the most influential navy family. she had a gay enemies to lovers romance with a pirate and then got killed by her own superior and then framed as a martyr. her younger sister jay then leaves the navy to go undercover as a pirate to find out what happened to her (all she was told is that ava was slain in a battle against pirates). ava is literally the 'haunts the narrative' archetype. she never once shows up, not even in a flashback, but the entire story is drenched in her lack of presence. she and her death and her image and her reputation are the motivators of countless characters in the campaign. her sister only joined pirates and then later betrayed the navy because ava died, her ex lover is starting a whole war with the navy over her death, there's multiple navy soldiers who have talked about how ava was the reason they wanted to fight in the navy, one of the main antagonists so far is ava's dad who is driven by grief, the list goes on. also she was a fucking badass.

I KNOW WE NEVER MET HER BUT SHE MEANT EVERYTHING TO JAY OKAY!!!!!!! SHE WAS SO GOOD TO HER!!!!!!!!!!!

She never has a single appearance in the show because she's dead but their absence effects every single character they left behind, including their little sister and their girlfriend (thats right, lesbians) she is also my favorite ever she must win.

BLUEY HEELER:

bluey is a great sister to bingo she loves her and their relationship goes far beyond the surface. also bluey is a masterpiece.

[metalandmagi]

If Captive Prince was a musical, it would be set to Taylor Swift's Reputation album and here's why:

Since I just reread Captive Prince again, I wanted to revamp my original post about how I broke down the Reputation album a little bit. Because that album eerily follows the narrative for Captive Prince so well and I don't want to be the only one who has this living in my head...

...Ready for It?

This could work in a few places, but I see it as Laurent’s POV towards the end of Prince’s Gambit. I see him singing it as makes plans for the battle at Charcy. He’s figured out that he has genuine feelings for Damen, but he’s putting all the pieces into place after parting with him at Ravenel so the real game with the regent can begin. The first verse: 

Knew he was a killer first time that I saw him

Wondered how many girls he had loved and left haunted

But if he's a ghost, then I can be a phantom

Holdin' him for ransom, some

Some boys are tryin' too hard, he don't try at all though

Younger than my exes, but he act like such a man, so

I see nothing better, I keep him forever

Like a vendetta-ta

At this point in the story, he would dream (“in the middle of the night, in my dreams”) of being alone in the summer palace with Damen (“I-island breeze and lights down low”). It also manages to describe Damen’s feelings for Laurent at first sight, (“knew I was a robber, first time that he saw me, stealing hearts and running off never saying sorry”) or at least, what Damen assumed about Laurent: that he was an ice cold bitch who probably toyed with men’s feelings for fun.

The downside is, immediately after this song, Laurent is captured by Govart and Guion and Damen is left to fight alone. 😭

End Game (Ft. Ed Sheeran & Future)

I can’t really decide on who exactly would sing which verse (maybe Laurent would beTaylor’s parts, and Damen would be Ed and Future’s verses), and there’s less of a concrete timeframe for this one. One option is in Kings Rising after the scene where Laurent sucks Damen off. But I also like to think about Laurent going back to Vere alone eventually (after the Summer Palace and Adventures of Charls) and needing Damen to reassure him that he won’t find someone else while the two of them have to rule their countries separately (until uniting them can be their end game). Both of their reputations in each other’s respective countries are a little…all over the place (“you and me would be a big conversation”) so Damen has to remind Laurent that the two of them understand each other on a completely different level than anyone ever has:

And you understand the good and bad end up in the song

For all your beautiful traits and the way you do it with ease

For all my flaws, paranoia, and insecurities

I've made mistakes and made some choices, that's hard to deny

And I also consider this verse to be extremely accurate for Laurent:

I hit you like bang, we tried to forget it, but we just couldn't

And I bury hatchets, but I keep maps of where I put 'em

Reputation precedes me, they told you I'm crazy

I swear I don't love the drama, it loves me

And I can't let you go, your handprints on my soul

It's like your eyes are liquor, it's like your body is gold

You've been callin' my bluff on all my usual tricks (Ooh)

So here's the truth from my red lips (Ah)

This one’s just fun. It doesn’t have a major plot in the story or anything.

I Did Something Bad 

I imagine this as Laurent’s confrontation with the regent after whipping Damen. Pretty self explanatory. And who could blame him? If Damen had killed my brother, I’d do it over and over and over again if I could. This song is kind of an odd situation because it deals more in romance than what would be applicable to this point in the story. He’s explaining that Damen laid hands on him in the baths, so he deserved to be whipped, but at the same time, Laurent is thinking about the ways men have manipulated him, so he shouldn’t owe it to anyone to be sweet and docile. So I think it would be like Laurent singing the chorus to the regent and certain verses and the bridge to himself.

Though, I’d say the “he” in the verse: 

He says, "Don't throw away a good thing"

But if he drops my name, then I owe him nothin'

And if he spends my change, then he had it comin'

Refers to the regent, instead of any sort of romantic interest, obviously. And then of course this exchange ends with the regent taking everything except Acquitart from Laurent 🙃

Don't Blame Me

Okay, this take is dark as hell, but I actually see this working as Aimeric’s thoughts about the regent, either right before his suicide or during his confession to Laurent (“I’m glad I did what I did. I did it for my family, and for the south. I’d do it again”). The whole thing is about how “love” or the idea of being loved and needing love from someone made him do crazy things.

I imagine the pre-chorus:

For you, I would cross the line

I would waste my time, I would lose my mind

They say, "She's gone too far this time"

Being Aimeric’s complicated feelings about what he’s done in the name of “love,” everything from killing Orlant to “seducing” Jord. Of course in the book, once he meets Jord, and gets a handle on what real love looks like, he at least apologizes to Jord, but the song isn’t necessarily apologetic to anyone else, so it would be a much darker take on Aimeric 😅

I really want to be able to fit the Eras Tour “Don’t Blame Me For What You Made Me Do” transition in here somewhere, but I don’t know if it would work out timing-wise. Maybe if “Don’t Blame Me” ended with Aimeric’s suicide, it would immediately transition into Laurent making plans for Charcy singing “Look What You Made Me Do.”

Delicate

Dual POVs for Damen and Laurent during Prince’s Gambit. Probably a montage of their time spent hunched over maps, realizing the other person isn’t who they thought they were. Laurent would sing the intro/pre-chorus (“This ain't for the best, My reputation's never been worse”), Damen would sing the first verse (“oh damn, never seen that color blue”), and they’d both sing the chorus. I think the song would pick up again when they’re in the Vaskian camp the first time, with Laurent singing the second verse (“do the girls back home touch you like I do?”) and alternating verses as the song goes on, always singing the chorus and bridge together. 

Look What You Made Me Do

Laurent’s entire relationship with the regent, obviously. It’s hard to know where the song would be exactly, since the books are from Damen’s perspective. Maybe this would be after Laurent kills Govart with the chair or it would transition to this after Aimeric sings “Don’t Blame Me” (like in the Eras Tour). If that’s the case, it would be while Laurent is in a horrible mood (since both Nicaise and Aimeric are dead) and he turns his anger on Damen while he’s planning for Charcy. So the song would be directed at both the regent and at Damen. It would be his big dramatic number before an intermission XD 

Everything about this song describes Laurent and his relationship to his uncle so perfectly. I mean come on!

I don't like your kingdom keys 

They once belonged to me 

You asked me for a place to sleep

Locked me out and threw a feast (what?)

But I got smarter, I got harder in the nick of time 

Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time 

I got a list of names, and yours is in red, underlined

I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me

I could also see the regent reprising it at some point, maybe during the trial, for extra effect, because it’s extra insulting when he would be the one singing it.

So It Goes... 

This is basically a running commentary of what’s going on in Laurent and Damen’s heads during their first kiss on the battlements, but I imagine it as a stripped down acoustic version. The first verse, pre-chorus, and first chorus would all apply to Laurent. For example: “Gold cage, hostage to my feelings, back against the wall”  is basically Laurent’s entire experience in Vere and then realizing he has feelings for Damen.

And of course the pre-chorus: “Cause we break down a little, But when you get me alone, it's so simple”  is so fitting because Laurent would be the one to commentate on how everything seems like it should be so simple with Damen, even though their history is the furthest thing from it.

Then the second verse and chorus would apply to Damen. And the rest of the song would be a duet.

The bridge: “You did a number on me, But, honestly, baby, who's counting?” is certainly accurate. These two really have done a number on each other by now, but they’re finally giving in to their feelings 😆

Gorgeous 

Literally any time Damen thinks about how attractive Laurent is, this plays in the background 🫠 The scene in the baths? This plays. When Laurent is relaxing before the assassination attempt? This plays. Then it starts playing when Laurent thinks Damen does something attractive. Damen rips the bars off the window? This plays. The inn at Nesson-Eloy? This plays. Then by the time they’re in the Vaskian tent (the second time) they sing it to each other directly (Laurent would sing the first verse–since it literally references Laurent getting drunk after he first meets Damen, and it references an “older boyfriend”--and Damen would sing the second). The song is the perfect blend of horny and frustrated that encapsulates these two during the first two books.

Getaway Car 

Jokaste reflecting on her actions in the first book when she’s imprisoned. I don’t know if she’d be singing it to herself or to Damen when he finds out about the deal to exchange her child for her freedom.

The first verse is all about deception and lying to a man:

It was the best of times, the worst of crimes

I struck a match and blew your mind

But I didn’t mean it and you didn't see it

The ties were black, the lies were white

In shades of gray in candlelight

I wanted to leave him, I needed a reason

The “X” in "X marks the spot where we fell apart, He poisoned the well, I was lyin' to myself” refers to the baths in the first scene of Captive Prince, where her betrayal really begins and she convinces herself that Kastor is the person to back. The song isn’t a perfect comparison, but it does have some good lines that I associate with her, especially: “should have known I’d be the first to leave” and “but with three of us honey, it’s a sideshow, and the circus ain’t a love story, and now we’re both sorry”

I see her as constantly being pulled by her affection for Damen (because I don’t think she loves him, but she does care about him) and her ambition, so the bridge:

We were jet-set, Bonnie and Clyde (Oh-oh)

Until I switched to the other side, to the other side

It's no surprise I turned you in (Oh-oh)

'Cause us traitors never win

I'm in a getaway car

I left you in a motel bar

Put the money in a bag and I stole the keys

That was the last time you ever saw me

Feels really appropriate for her.

King of My Heart

Laurent’s running commentary during the Summer Palace. Just pure happiness and sap from the ice prince whose heart has melted. If this trilogy was a movie, this would be the end credits song, preferably a stripped down version like in the Eras Tour acoustic set.

Dancing With Our Hands Tied 

I see this as Laurent making the decision to give himself up at the Kingsmeet. We get a little snippet from Laurent’s perspective when they’re traveling through Akielos with Charls, the night that he frees Jokaste. Damen is asleep, and I can see this being Laurent’s internal struggle as he watches Damen sleep right before he goes to the wagon and frees Jokaste.

Again, I see this as a softer, acoustic version of the song that plays on the feeling of helplessness. During the first verse and chorus, he’s fully realized his feelings for Damen, but he knows the regent is always one step ahead of him. He hopes he can use Guion’s wife to his advantage, but he’s skeptical that his uncle would give up Jokaste’s son, so he still feels like his hands are tied when it comes to actually having a future with Damen. This part of the first verse:

Oh, twenty-five years old

Oh, how were you to know? And

My, my love had been frozen

Deep blue, but you painted me golden

Fits them really well, considering it even gets Damen’s age correct.

I can also see this being reprised later, maybe when Damen and Laurent are walking through the Kingsmeet together. Damen would echo the second verse:

I, I loved you in spite of

Deep fears that the world would divide us

So, baby, can we dance

Oh, through an avalanche? And

Say, say that we got it

I'm a mess, but I'm the mess that you wanted

Oh, 'cause it's gravity

Oh, keeping you with me

Damen knows that even if they manage to win their thrones back, people might not accept their union (he even thinks about how if Theomedes was alive, Laurent would never be allowed in the Kingsmeet at all), “people started talking putting us through our paces”  but he ultimately wants them to end up ruling together by this point. So he and Laurent reprise the chorus together. 

Dress 

Ancel and Berenger’s entire relationship lol 😆

The first line highlights everything about their arrangement: “Our secret moments in a crowded room, They got no idea about me and you” Ancel is specifically with Berenger so they can keep up appearances at court!

Then: “All of this silence and patience, pining and anticipation, My hands are shakin' from holdin’ back from you” describes Ancel’s slowly building attraction to Berenger, and his quest to get Berenger to sleep with him.

Even the line: “And if I get burned, At least we were electrified” works, because they are playing a dangerous game with the regent and have no guarantee that Laurent will take back the throne. Berenger could lose everything, but Ancel doesn’t care. So I think this would take place at the very end of Pet, right when Ancel asks “But if he wins?”

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

I actually see this starting out as a villain song for the regent, probably admonishing Laurent after Damen is whipped in Captive Prince. (“So why’d you have to rain on my parade? I’m shaking my head and locking the gates”) I think he’d sing everything up until the bridge after Damen is whipped, and maybe he’d reprise the chorus during the confrontation at the Kingsmeet.

BUT THEN AT THE END OF THE TRIAL LAURENT WOULD SING IT BACK TO HIM WITH THE BRIDGE INCLUDED! 

And this time, “But I’m not the only friend you’ve lost lately” would refer to Aimeric, Nicaise, and Guion. 

I just like the idea of Laurent singing the bridge, specifically, “And here’s to you, ‘cause forgiveness is a nice thing to do Haha, I can't even say it with a straight face” before the regent is beheaded, and then singing the rest of the song as a victory lap.

Call It What You Want

Another duel POV song, either just before or after their second time sleeping together. This is the time when Damen and Laurent are being intimate with the knowledge of Damen’s identity out in the open. Both Laurent and Damen are emotionally vulnerable, because this is when Laurent comforted Damen after he overhears Laurent’s conversation with Jokaste about Kastor murdering his father. Laurent would have the first verse and chorus:

My castle crumbled overnight

I brought a knife to a gunfight

They took the crown, but it's alright

All the liars are calling me one

Nobody's heard from me for months

I'm doin' better than I ever was

Damen would get the second verse and chorus (“All the jokers dressing up as kings, They fade to nothing when I look at him”)

The song is about how Laurent never expected all of the tragedy in his life to lead to his biggest victory, and Damen never expected to find comfort in a man who is meant to be his enemy. And the lyric: “You don’t need to save me, but would you run away with me?”  feels like it would be a callback or response to the “We hold the center” line from Prince’s Gambit.

New Year's Day

This is Damen reflecting on his relationship with Laurent (either while he’s recovering from his stab wound from Kastor or as Laurent is crowned at the end of Adventures of Charls). I think it works for how in the past, Damen never felt a deep connection with anyone he’d ever been with, but with Laurent, he’d stay and clean up after the party. “Don't read the last page, But I stay when it's hard or it's wrong or we're makin' mistakes” refers to how difficult it will be to unite their kingdoms, but he is convinced that they will be together through everything, and that makes it all worth it ❤️

It’s a straightforward song that fits Damen’s honorable personality very well. Deep down, Damen is a little scared of Laurent becoming “a stranger whose laugh I would recognize anywhere” once they’re back on their thrones, but if they “hold on to the memories” of their struggles together, they will make it through anything.

[colemckenzies]

Jesus Christ Superstar: Ultimate Edition

this easter It Is Time. using my years of fixation and research i present to you The Best Version of every song from jesus christ superstar, plus commentary. obviously subjective opinion so do feel free to discourse in the tags bc as you may have picked up i enjoy talking about the relative merits of jcs productions. also i might not even stand by this in a week bc i find it hard to keep multiple versions in my head at the same time for comparison and there are so so many versions.

please note that acting, vocal quality, music direction, and where available staging have all been taken into account. act 2 in rb bc of link restrictions.

heaven on their minds - 2012 broadway revival

obviously in terms of pure vocals carl anderson is unbeatable forever, but the staging of the 2012 broadway revival pips it for me. josh young's voice is still gorgeous and the judas/jesus/mary throuple is everything. i love versions where hotm is sung directly To jesus, and i love that in this version jesus actually listen and takes judas' concerns on board. the love and respect between all three of them is palpable and even though it is a serious disagreement, part of that disagreement comes from the fact that they care about each other so much. that's tragedy baby!

special mention to henrike tönnes on the 2022 rob carroll version, i specifically like the Ending of the song for that one. also the sarcastic clap along w the disciples that judas does in the 2013 hungary version.

what's the buzz/ strange thing mystifying - 2018 tv event

annoyingly this isn't on youtube but tbh the staging is nothing mindblowing. i think what's the buzz is a great song for showcasing the usp of each version and in this one i think being able to hear the real crowd actually cheering for jesus (john legend) really adds to the narrative. i also absolutely love brandon victor dixon and as i have said before he would be one of my favourite judases if judas were straight. sara bareilles does a great 'offended' face when he bitches about her lmao.

honourable mention to the 2012 uk arena tour for again showing off the conceit of 'modern day activists' really well in this song, not forgetting of course WOTS THE BUZZ #buzz tweet

then we are decided - 2013 hungary

(starts at about 9:49) obviously not a huge amount of competition for this one, i wish more versions included it bc it's a great song :( anyway i loveee the staging choice to have everyone else freeze-framed on stage with the priests walking among them, and i freaking love this caiaphas. literally inserting it into what's the buzz also works nicely

i do miss kurt yaghjian from the 1973 film tho, forever obsessed with his voice and facial expressions. extra shout out to the striving artists version for simply existing.

everything's alright - 2006 austria

something about the musical direction in 90% of versions of this song goes right through me, like there is always some weird instrument that makes me Cringe. but this version is Nice :) really enjoy how Pissed this judas is. and i love the way the long notes last into the next section of the song. i will say i prefer the alt melody for 'people who are hungry' but you can't have everything

this is a really nice one on the all-female cast recording as well, obviously it's already the most female-heavy song of the show but shoshana bean's judas is particularly good here i think. also of course carl anderson with tears in his eyes grasping ted neely's hands while the music swells is ingrained on my brain for all time.

this jesus must die - 1994 studio cast

this album as a whole is probably my Least Favourite JCS Ever, but i will admit that this song fucks. the haunting eeriness at the beginning. the way it kicks into a funky little syncopated rhythm. the disembodied hosannas. unexpected delight.

2012 uk arena tour is unfortunately disqualified for having possibly the Most antisemitic portrayal of the priests, which is a shame because it's probably my favourite casting. one of my favourite annas portrayals, but in general all of them are distinct and fully embodied which does make that version very fun to watch. i also really enjoy the 2019 castaway productions version for this song, the way they play instruments while they sing like a lil band, and caiaphas' eye make-up is sick. 1973 film is obviously also iconic with the little scaffolding tippy taps, and the way kurt yaghjian sings 'a trick-or-two with lepers'. i love this song sorry.

hosanna - 2017 striving artists

i kind of don't have justification for this one LOL i just like it. i know there are versions that are sung better and really the staging is quite important for this song but idk i just find this version really calming. i don't know if it's the music direction? i don't know enough about music tbh

admittedly this is another one that works really well for the 2018 tv event, but doesn't quite win for me as the crowd don't cheer in all the right places and john legend doesn't react at all to the 'would you DIE for me?' line which is crucial. for good reaction to that line the 2000 film where it elevates the bitchy gay tension in the love triangle really nails it.

simon zealotes - 2011 austria

EASYYY WIN FOR ME this is actually the song that made me want to pick a best version for each one because this version IS so much better than any other one for me. the guitar!!!!!! rob's energy!! the music design for this one really fucks so severely and then there's just rob jumping around hyping up the crowd (there is a film version from 2008 on youtube, but i wanted to capture the music for this one). iconic.

big love also to hungary 2013 for having a simon who's in a wheelchair, particularly notable when it's really the highest energy role in the show. i do enjoy.

poor jerusalem - 2022 rob carroll

i cannot find any information about this album other than what's on spotify but i do enjoy the slight alt melodies in this version and i like his voice.

not a lot to go into for this song really. i like the ben forster version a lot as well, and the 1996 london cast version. 'close your eyes' is a better lyric than 'live a lie'. moving on.

pilate's dream - 2022 all-female cast

may be biased bc I LOVE ORFEH but i just think this version is so gorgeous. i love the little vocal drifts without going too overboard and distracting from the song. the music composition is especially pleasing as well.

there's a lot of honourable mentions i could give here bc i think pilate has so much potential for power and gravitas, but 1973 film, 2012 uk arena tour, 2013 hungary, and east end theatrical ensemble. are also big favs. in terms of staging i love the fact that 2019 castaway productions has jesus himself on stage playing the backing piano like he actually is haunting pilate.

the temple - 1992 australia

australia 1992 habitually has some of the most interesting and creative music direction and this is one of the songs where it particularly pays off. love the whistles. i also like that the second 'get out' is spoken, not screamed. the second half is appropriately creepy with the sustained 'chriiiist'. pretty boring staging but at least the costumes are fun.

i don't know how to love him - east end theatrical ensemble

possibly controversial choice but ugh i love this version i even love how low the sound quality is. like listening to a vinyl. i think her voice is so gorgeous and i love her accent. deeply soothing to listen to. i feel like im in the 70s rn.

i'm also a huge fan of the 1996 london cast recording, joanna ampil has such a sweet voice and the way she emotes so that you can really Hear it works well for this song. special shout out to 2012 uk arena tour which i don't think is a particularly amazing version but we get the absolute gunshow from mel c at the end so we love it.

damned for all time/blood money - 1973 film

CARL!! I feel like 1973 film and 1996 london album are at a disadvantage in this bc they're what i grew up with so i kind of take them for granted but this is undeniably iconic. no one can commit to the tortured soul but belief he's doing the right thing like him. the way he can scream but it still sounds Good. i prefer versions that have annas suggest 'a fee' rather than caiaphas just repeating himself so that's here too. the weird keening way he sings 'on thursday night'. annas dropping the coins just as he reaches for them. UGH so good. a lot less brassy than other versions as well.

this is another song that kinda fucks in every version, but the original 1970 album and the 2018 tv event are particularly good i think. also that one bit in 2012 uk arena tour where annas is like '...... get up off the floor.'

[got-into-worm-by-mistake]

Shell 4.5 Live Reactions

(This is me, writing reactions as I read, because why the fuck not. They're not complete, mature thoughts taken after I sit back and evaluate what I've read. Consider them as such)

In silence, we caught the bus at the ferry and got off at the Trainyard, the part of the Docks that sat opposite to the Boardwalk.

There is just something so deliciously absurd about the mental image of supervillains, even teenage ones, just... riding the bus. Granted, they're (presumably) not doing it in costume, but still.

slanted just enough that people wouldn’t be able to comfortably walk or sleep on top of them.

Ah yes, gotta love hostile architecture.

“If you asked me five hours ago, I would’ve said no,” Regent replied.  “I would have told you, sure, she’s a loose cannon, she’s reckless, crazy, she’s easily pissed off and she’ll hospitalize those people who do piss her off… but I’d have said she’s loyal, that even if she doesn’t necessarily like us-”

I mean, trust but verify and all that. No Rachel, no money, it's a safe assumption.

A soft clapping answered her.  It was slow, unenthusiastic to the point of being sarcastic. “Brilliantly deduced,” the same person that had been clapping spoke out.  As Tattletale whipped her head around, I took a few steps back from the storage locker, to get a better look at the two people who stood on the roof.

It's cliche, but I always like the 'character watching the protagonists figure it out and then do the sarcastic clap' trope.

They were standing with one leg higher than the other, to keep from sliding off the angled roof, and both were wearing identical costumes.  The costumes sported blue man-leotards with broad belts cinched around their waists, skintight white sleeve and leggings.  Their hoods were elastic, clinging to their heads so they left only a window for the face, and each sported a single white antenna.  Of all colors, their gloves, boots and the balls at the top of their antennae were bubblegum pink.  Their faces were obscured by oversize goggles with dark lenses.

Which... which video game is this?

“Rest assured, Tattletale, you do,” Über proclaimed.  He was the sort of person who proclaimed, announced, broadcasted and declared.  Just like Grue’s power altered his voice to make him sound haunting and inhuman, Über’s power made him sound like the guy who narrated trailers for action movies or late night commercials.  Overdramatic, intense about everything he said, no matter how mundane.  Like someone overacting the role of a gallant knight in a kid’s movie.

Evocative. I do think Wildbow's willingness to do descriptions like this (helped by using 1st person narrative, which I do think facilitates this sort of thing) whereas a lot of conventional writing wisdom would say to not do this, is a big part of Worm's success, honestly.

Leet frowned and turned to the camera, “Is that really necessary?” “You fucked with us,” I replied, “I fuck with your subscriber base.”

Hit 'em where it hurts.

He didn’t get to finish.  Regent swung his arm out to one side, and Über lost his footing.  I joined the others in stepping back out of the way as he fell face first onto the pavement at the base of the locker.

Regent's abilities would probably let him do well at slapstick improv shows or something. I mean, you don't need to fake a trip and fall with him around. :rofl:

Grue spoke in a low voice that wouldn’t carry to the pair of villains, “They did something to Bitch, they’ve got the money.  If we don’t get a decisive victory here, our reputation is fucked.”

Villain fight!

I wonder if, during her career as a villain, Taylor fights other villains more than heroes. From what I know of Worm, I wouldn't be surprised. But how much more, pound for pound? :thinking_face:

This was the sort of thing I had put on a costume to do.  Sure, the context wasn’t what I would have chosen, but going up against bad guys?

As far as some of Taylor's various rationalization's go, this isn't even a particularly dangerous or slipper one. :thinking_face:

[branwendaughterofllyr]

That’s such a good point about always asking ‘why?’/ ‘what for?’ when it comes to a theory’s narrative relevance — what it would mean for the story, what point would it make etc. It’s why I could never get my head around people being so dead set on a T4rg restoration as a positive endgame when we have all this legitimate reasoning for their downfall pre-AGOT, why they are distrusted, why their ideology is deeply suspect, and so on. It’s counterintuitive to me that the narrative would essentially return full circle to that regime, a T4rg on the throne, when they’ve been presented to us in such a specific, abusive and uncomfortable way. It devalues that pre-AGOT story, IMO. Bcoz it’s not enough to be ‘not like other T4rgs’ for me, the active association is too damning, too telling of what someone’s interests really are. But it’s like you said, people get deeply attached to one obviously biased pov and so disregard the wider, layered narrative that GRRM is trying to create through multiple povs that prompt us to question those who seek out power and if they can ever be truly justified in what they do to attain and/or maintain it.

It drives me wild that so many people don't ask "then what was the fucking point?" when talking about the ending of ASOIAF. The Targaryens had like two-three good rulers, all of whom ended up making some really horrible choices in the end that nearly burned the whole continent to the ground (This IS a Jaehaerys I hateblog). It's crazy to me that so many people that Fire&Blood is positive for the Targaryen Restoration when it's basically just a full length book's worth of "look at these bitches! Who put them in charge?" (the dragons). And then have Dany basically go "yes, fire and blood is a valid way to rule, my ancestors did nothing wrong" makes me highly skeptical of her chances.

And the PoV for trap for Dany is amazing, because as of ADWD, none of the enemies she has gone up against have been sympathetic (I mean, I think MMD is, but a lot of people don't) or even povs. Which lets her fans sit there and say "no, look, the people's she's up against are clearly terrible and she's the hero in this scenario." Which is going to shift drastically when she goes up against the Starks, who have no reason to love her and vice versa. How can Dany declaring that Starks and Lannisters are both the usurper’s dogs and therefore equally evil and her enemy not make everyone sit up and take notice. Yes, Dany going “Eddard Stark and his heart of ice are responsible for my family’s downfall” is absolutely going to win over Jon “I just want Ned Stark to be proud of me” Snow and Arya “I will cut anyone who says shit about my parents” Stark. I foresee no future conflict there!

The theories about the three heads of dragon having such traction make me laugh, when the choices Dany presented with are “fire and blood” and the literal and metaphoric planting of trees. She has to chain up her dragons because they are inherently at odds with creating a better future, but she chooses the path her family has walked again and again to the detriment of everyone else. Dany’s refusal to learn from her family’s mistakes and arrogance, is what dooms her to meet the same fate as the rest of them. The idea that “if I look back, I am lost” is her madness mantra makes so much sense, since if she looks back at the path of destruction she and all the other Targaryens have left in their wake, she might falter and reconsider, so she plows ahead straight to her doom, is ugh, such good writing.

(And it works as a foil to the Starks, who are so haunted by their pasts and the past of their families, they can never untangle themselves from it, even when they try to disappear into another identity)

So what does it actually mean for the narrative, if Dany didn’t actually live in Braavos? Does it change where she’s headed at all? What point would it serve if Tyrion is a secret Targaryen? What point does it serve if anyone is a secret Targaryen? Does it change the fact that the Targaryens burn themselves to the ground based on a flimsy prophecy one of them was arrogant enough to to believe, and no one checked the deteriorating madness of their head? That the Targaryens have set themselves over literally everyone else, to the point that they would rather practice incest than marry those beneath them? And the heroine of would-be Targaryen restoration doesn’t question any of this, and just says that it’ll be different this time! Because she has the magic nukes again!

And it’s brilliant because it really is all about “the hero of the other side”! Of course everyone likes to think that they are the hero, and it’s easy to fall into believing the same when you spend so much time in a character’s head. It is much harder to try and bring together all these different PoVs to try and figure out the broader narrative. And because Dany is so seperated from the rest of the characters, is easy to dismiss all the problems she has in coming to Westeros because none of the other characters really know her, and it’ll be different once she’s there, because she’s different, when it’s been set up that pretty much every POV character has a reason to keep a Targaryen with dragons at arms length and in reality, Dany has nothing to challenge those reasons.

It’s great writing, but it clearly has and still does go over some people’s heads, which is comepletely fair because ASOIAF is, in fact, a LOT. But it so often comes from the same people who dedicate immense amounts of time and energy to the series, and that’s when it becomes funny

[controversial-blorbo-bracket]

Controversial Character Tournament Round 2: Jaiden from The DSCP, A 17776 Roleplay vs Rose Quartz from Steven Universe

(remember that these characters are fictional and your fellow tumblr users are real. i will block you if you harass others in the notes, please consider sending your unhinged harassment to my inbox instead)

Propaganda under the cut, may contain spoilers:

Jaiden:

HATE: - "OKAY SO. This is Jaiden. In a world thousands of years in the future where humans are immortal and spacecraft are beginning to wake up and become people on their own, Jaiden decides *she* wants to be the catalyst to wake one of them up. For years and years she tries and fails, until she finds CHIPsat, quietly shut down a while ago rather than decommissioned and.. well. taken out of the sky. CHIPsat isn't her first attempt at this, but they're her first *successful* one. She asks the newly-awakened satellite one thing: "Hey little buddy. How are you holding up?" The two are close friends for awhile, and I'm not about to spill ALL the details about EVERYTHING she did but let's just say: in a world where machines are literally people, hacking is NOT the most ethical skill ever. Jaiden's a BITCH nobody likes you jaiden (rusty if youre seeing this dont worry shes a VERY cool character. i just also want to crush her like a bug. hope this helps) also here's the image rusty used for the dani profile: https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/783126743191519252/785258702188970014/unknown.png or the image rusty used for the jaiden profile: https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/783126743191519252/914301198994116619/1306309_f0CiRxGx-1.png"

Rose Quartz:

LOVE: - "She was the example in the intro post I'm so proud of her. <3 I saw this bracket and I was immediately like "rose quartz my favorite character rose quartz" and lo and behold I was Correct. "UwU space mom victim" is a little simplistic, she has the range. She haunts the narrative. She taught me how hiding yourself because you're afraid that people won't like who you really are leads to continued self-resentment and avoidance. Loving her teaches me that even if you did do something completely irredeemable, even if you did do something worthy of all that hate you hold for yourself, people can still see the entire you and decide to love you anyway. I think even the other diamonds are better-regarded than her, which... incredible pr stunt from them tbh. I don't dislike the other diamonds but come on they made no independent effort to change w/o Steven—there's literally no question in the "who's the better person" department. Of course the "who's the better character" department will always be incredibly subjective but she is so complex, and multi-facteted, she screws up so so much and yet somehow her biggest mistake of all might be her own self-degrading. "What an incredible power... the ability to grow up," said with such longing. Girl look at Jungle Moon, you really think you're still the same gem? You grew so much and you never saw it. She's so selfish and selfless and self-destructive all at the same time and it's captivating. I want to put her in a jar and study her like a bug." - "did she do a lot wrong? yes. do i think she had good intentions at heart but just majorly fucked it up? also yes" - "she has so much depth oh my god" - "look idk I just want to make sure she gets submitted to the bracket because you’re so right that she belongs here" - "Rose gets a lot of shit because we saw her character arc in reverse. The situation is very messy but it’s also very nuanced, and regardless on how the discourse hammer judges her, I will always love her." HATE: - "Yeah" - "Anti : I'm not one her biggest hater but I can't forgive her for what she did to Pearl, and the other crystal gems. I've read some interesting defenses of the character but I can't get past all the lying, leaving and (accidental) abusing." BOTH: - "Is there a proper way to say that I loved her for a while in the show, but the showrunners kept piling blame onto her with less and less justifiable and more and more abuse of power things (without including counterbalancing reminders of how much she loved the planet and helping people) and so I kind of. Love early Rose Quartz, the complicated war leader with a messy past that she's escaping from, but hate Pink Diamond?"

[gotta-pet-em-all]

Okay, so it seems like rotomblr broke… again? And I can’t see any of the past posts, so I guess I’m redoing our intro.

Hi, we’re the Fluffstep system! Collectively, all of us respond to Fluff online. If you don’t know who’s talking, chances are we don’t either. Dissociation is a bitch and we tend to be blurry anyways, we’re still figuring it out..

In rough order of appearance, here’s who we have!

Elle + Bryelle: Both of them have the body age and appearance, although Bryelle has longer hair and Elle likes the current length better. They share memories better than anyone in the system, so if you’ve talked to one, the other will remember what happened. We think they split initially from trauma, although we’re a mixed origin system. Bryelle helps us with organization and talking to people, and Elle is good at taking care of our pokemon and talking to the therapist. Bryelle is somewhat high strung, while Elle has defeatist tendencies. 

Firestar: Fictive from Warrior Skitty; he doesn’t front a whole lot but he’s great at emotional support and hyping us up. Also, he had a thing with Graystripe back home. Please do not approach us with Firestar ship discourse, this is what happened to him and he doesn’t want to engage in that. He’s post-canon, but with some divergences.

Linnea: We think she’s about eight or so; we’re not sure when she split but we were pretty young. She’s not great at emotional regulation, so please be extra kind when she’s in front. Linnea’s job is to monitor our body and make sure everything’s running smoothly. She’s a bit of a crybaby and has been trying to get us to buy her more plushies. Linnea, we love you but the bed isn’t big enough.

Max: She’s a walk-in, not positive when she showed up but she’s been blurry and has the worst dissociation. We’re trying to get her to front more, and she’s coming out more now that we’re out of Plasma. Cool lesbian who’s in her mid twenties, by our best guess. She’s the best at cooking and taking phone calls, but sucks at sending emails.

Dragonite: She showed up around puberty, and holds most of the deviance. We try to keep the blog safe for work, but Dragonite… if you are a minor, please block the tag #Dragonite speaks. We appreciate her doing the exploration for us, and breaking down some of the sexual shame we have! But she lacks restraint in many ways.

Zor: a zorua/zoroark shifter. We really don’t know where it came from or what it wants, and we’re still working on communication. Far as we can tell, they like raw meat and having messy hair. They probably won’t type anything. 

Snowkit: he’s still miffed that he never earned his warrior name; we suspect he might be a little younger than the body age. He escaped his narrative to haunt us specifically, and is the disability advocate for the body. He doesn’t front a lot due to sensory issues with sound, since he’s Deaf and the body being Hearing is weird. 

[mars-ipan]

hi what's your favorite characters outside of dangan

ooh i actually have a good few!

from ace attorney: maya fey, franziska von karma, trucy wright, apollo justice, klavier gavin (when will capcom free my man from the narrative basement </3)

there’s also pearl and marina from splatoon. pearl in particular is my fav i love me a little goblin woman. i’m a big fan of frye too

when i was sick before i was hospitalized i ended up binge watching the whole first season of jjk as well as watching jjk0. there’s a lot of really good characters in there but i think my favs are mahito (smiley insane white haired bitches will forever haunt me unfortunately! i’ve actually been like this my whole life i liked the smiley kid with the stitches in tokyo ghoul too), gojo (1- duh, 2- see previous parentheses), megumi, mai and maki (i’m such a sucker for a good twin narrative), and ummm. oh god i forget his name. the cursed speech user who only speaks in onigiri ingredients. i think he’s really kind and i like him a lot :)

sailor uranus is my favorite sailor scout for several reasons (when i learned megumi ogata voices her i nearly lost my mind bc what do you mean my favorite character is also my favorite character. this is what solidified her as my fav va of all time btw.) that said i am also a STARK chibiusa defender the writing fucked her over it’s not her fault. calling her evil version “black lady” sure was a localization choice though

my favorite pokemon rival is barry :] i think he’s endearing and i like watching him grow. plus his competitiveness is really fun to me

ummm in dunmeshi my big 3 favs are chilchuck, marcille, and izutsumi! that said i’m also a big kabruhead and while i don’t know his character that well at all bc i’m an anime only i AM deeply fascinated by mithrun (i think he’s hot. head in hands komaeda changed my brain chemistry i will never be the same). i like thistle a lot too i think he’s got a swagful gender

there we go. proof that there’s room for more in my head than just danganronpa. that was probably good for me to do tbh get some variety in here for a second