#what the fuck guys this is too much for my brain to process

[crushmeeren]

Quickies with the MHA Boys!

Everyone involved in this work of fiction is 18+/aged up — if that bothers you block me or scroll on.

Bakugou, Kirishima, Todoroki

How the MHA Boys Eat You Out Link

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Bakugou Katsuki

Katsuki doesn’t mind quickies per se. He just has to be in the right mood for it. He’d much rather take his sweet time. Not wanting to rush, being able to relax afterwards — otherwise he’d rather just not have sex at all.

But there are times when he’s frustrated. When your schedules haven’t lined up, when you haven’t had sex in weeks — he gets pent up.

Katsuki’s the kind of guy who will lounge on your bed in just his tight black boxer briefs. Arms folded behind his head as he lazily waits for you to get out of the shower.

He knows it gives you a view that you’re unable to resist of his unreasonably slim waist and toned arms — as the position allows his biceps to flex involuntarily.

And of course, he’s completely aware that you have to leave for work in less than 20 minutes. He just doesn’t give a single shit.

He’s been dreaming about your warm pussy sucking in his cock in all night and there’s not a chance in hell he’s letting you go until he fucks you silly.

Tilting his head, he leers at your naked body as you drop your towel onto the bed. He urges you in a low, rasping voice to “come here baby,” sporting a wolfish grin.

You already know what he wants. It makes your stomach burn pleasantly with arousal.

“Five minutes Katsuki, I’m serious.” You shoot him a pointed glare. He scoffs, rolling his eyes.

“As if I won’t have you cumming in less than two minutes.” The grin he levels you with is sharp around the edges.

Although, the man’s right to be confident.

Katsuki will push you onto the bed, cock already stiff and thick when he wiggles between your legs, yanking his briefs down to mid thigh.

You’re turned on enough that he slides in with relative ease, even if it burns a little, because let’s be real — he’s so hot you would take him any time, any place.

Katsuki will tug one of your legs up, hooking it over his shoulder. He’ll bend you in half and circle his fingers around your throat, applying pressure that’s just right.

With precision, he wholly makes this quickie worth it. Katsuki has your toes curling, cheeks flushed. Choking on your own moans as you cum.

He does exceptionally well with the time limit, pulling out and cumming all over your belly with a groan that leaks out between gritted teeth.

Almost exactly five minutes on the dot.

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Kirishima Eijirou

Eijirou has the spirit of a happy, care free, lovesick golden retriever. So naturally, he loves physical touch.

He’s addicted to constantly being in your space. Hugging you, holding your hand, pulling you to sit on his lap, kissing you.

And if we’re being honest, whenever he gets the chance, he’ll be inside you too. Stretching you out. Making you feel so good it melts your brain — if only because it makes him feel twice the amount of pleasure to you see come undone.

Needless to say, Eijirou enjoys quickies a fuck ton. He also is the sort of guy who gets literal heart eyes whenever you initiate one with him.

He’ll be relaxing on the couch, lost in some sort of video game when you snatch the controller out of his hands and place it out of his reach.

Eijirou sputters, glancing up at you in surprise. His startled expression turns to one of knowing when you straddle his lap. Your sundress bunching up and exposing the soft skin of your inner thighs in the process.

“I’ve got 10 minutes until I leave for my appointment. Wanna have sex Ei?” You ask teasingly, a coy smile playing on your lips. You wrap your arms around his neck, gently trailing your fingers up the nape of his neck.

You swear if Eijirou had a tail it would be wagging. He moans low in his throat. Your light touch and filthy words are all it takes to get him hard, stiff cock pressing eagerly into your thigh.

“How could I ever say no to you gorgeous?” He beams at you with his sharp teeth, resting his hands your hips. You snicker, raising up a little so he can slid his shorts down enough to free himself — just under his balls.

He sneaks your panties to the side, rubbing tight circles into your clit with his thumb. Your teeth sink into your lower lip, trying to hold in a whine.

He has mercy on you, gripping his shaft and parting your pussy with his cock until his head catches. You ease yourself down onto him until you’re fully seated in his lap.

You both simultaneously breathe out a sigh of relief.

After that, he lets you ride him until you’re sweaty and satiated. He praises you sweetly, holding your waist with a tight grip and helping you bounce.

“That’s it baby, take what you need. I’m right here, I’ve got you. Love it when you cum for me,” he coos, voice tender and adoring.

It’s effortless to cum like that, face buried in his shoulder while you rock back and forth in his lap. Letting him hug you tightly to his chest.

Once you come back down to earth, you check for the time, noticing you’ve only got two minutes left.

You taunt Eijirou with the time limit, telling him it’s his turn to cum before he has to take care of himself.

He chases his own pleasure desperately. Kissing you to keep himself from biting marks into your neck.

You’re only running a couple minutes late when you go, leaving Eijirou a sticky, gooey mess on the couch.

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Todoroki Shouto

Shouto, he’s, well — a mix of the two really. He enjoys taking his time, but he also cannot keep himself out of your bubble.

One of Shouto’s absolute favorite past times is cuddling with you.

The coziness of your body, the way you fit like a missing puzzle piece into his chest. The tender kisses he can trail across your neck and the ones you give him in return.

That’s why Shouto takes immense pleasure in those honey like, sweet and warm, limbs riddled with sleep morning quickies.

He can’t resist the temptation.

You’ll hear Shouto’s piercing alarm go off in the morning, jostling you from your dreams. The sheets rustle as Shouto maneuvers to turn off his alarm.

Your lids are droopy, and your limbs lag by a couple seconds when you turn over to cling to him.

You sprawl out half way on top of his chest and you slip your arms around his neck, nuzzling his shoulder.

“Sho,” you mumble in his ear, voice rasp and faint. He snakes an arm around your waist, tugging you closer.

“Mm?” The noise he makes rumbles in his chest

“I want you before you go, please,” you plead softly, kissing along his jawline. He squeezes you tighter briefly, responding without a trace of hesitation.

“Turn over baby, I’ll have to make it quick.”

So, you shift around until you’re on your side. Back facing Shouto as he scoots in close, wiggling down until his forehead rests at the back of your neck.

He shoves the large T-shirt you’re wearing up to your ribs. Smoothing his hand over your bare ass and squeezing until your breath hitches in your throat. Shouto smacks your ass playfully.

Automatically you lift your thigh and Shouto grips underneath it to keep it in that position, shifting his legs until he’s got the right angle.

The silky, warm skin of his full cock slides along your pussy and you jolt. He must’ve got rid of his briefs at some point.

Shouto shift his hips, pressing the head of his cock to your pussy, rocking his hips unhurriedly until he’s sliding in and out completely with each thrust.

You’re already crying out his name, gripping the sheets.

“Is this what you needed Angel?” Shouto pants hotly against your neck. “Your pussy feels so good,” he moans, tone pushing into a whine.

You can’t speak, still halfway asleep as Shouto takes you with slow and deliberate thrusts.

He repeatedly presses into your sweet spot as your climax builds gradually. It’s like a faucet sluggishly dripping warm water into a cup until it fills to the brim and overflows through your veins.

It doesn’t take long for Shouto to cum after your pussy clenches around him like a vice.

He presses in until his balls are flush against your skin. Biting into the back of your shoulder blade with a high pitched moan. That will definitely leave a mark.

“I love you,” Shouto murmurs, planting a kiss to your cheek after he helps you get clean enough to fall back asleep.

You’re out like a light before you hear the door shut, hoping Shouto makes it to the agency on time.

[daisykihannie]

What could go wrong? Chapter 2 (H.JS)

pairing: Incubus!Jisung x gn arab!reader + bff!Felix

warnings: smut, NSFW, exhibitionism, voyerism, oral, monster fucking, no protection, power exchange, angst (if you squint), fluff (if you squint), phone sex (kinda), orgasm control, orgasm denial, edging, teasing, dacryphilia, praise, degradation, etc.

chapter 1 | chapter 3

a/n: i have written and re-written chapter two so many times and i hate all of them. This is the best one out of all my attempts so, this one will be chapter 2. I wanted to touch more on the whole Jisung Catching feelings part but maybe i’ll do a chapter three later in for that. I’m sorry if this isn’t as good as chapter one. i kinda psyched myself out when writing this bc i’m scared to disappoint you guys after you all loved chapter one so much.

When you woke up again you could feel a weight resting across your hip and a firm pressure applied to your back. Opening your eyes, you were greeted with the bright rays of morning sun dancing across your face, causing you to squint your eyes as they attempted to adjust. As you moved to grab your phone from your bedside table, the grip around your waist tightened and a growl greeted your ears. Luckily you weren’t as startled as the first time you awoke to the demon's presence against you, this time a small smile pulled at your lips instead and you rolled over swiftly to be facing him, the tips of your noses grazing each other in the process.

Your movements caused the demon to screw his eyes shut and his eyebrows to furrow in annoyance, displaying that he clearly had no intentions of getting up yet. When your body stilled and settled into a comfortable position again, his face relaxed back into a peaceful pout and you felt your heart begin to beat harshly against your rib cage. How could a demon, whose entire purpose was seduction and sex, look so damn innocent and cute? It was really starting to give you whiplash and a slight headache as you desperately tried to wrap your head around it.

You figured it wouldn’t hurt to take a moment to admire the larger man in your bed. You lie there with only millimeters between your faces and he truly is a masterpiece, you can feel yourself getting lost in the gentleness of his softer features as your eyes travel everywhere they could reach with the lack of space between yourselves, determined to have his form engraved into your brain. His hand kept its firm grip on your hip bone, almost like he was worried you’d slip away and disappear if his grip loosened even slightly.

“Enjoying the view?” his deep, growling, morning voice made you jump in surprise and it successfully snapped you out of your trance. The bass of his tone shook you to your core, heat beginning to pool in your underwear as your body began to react to him before your brain had a chance to. Right as you were ready to reply with a snarky remark like you normally would to his cockiness, your phone began to ring.

Letting out a quiet groan, you reluctantly flipped your body back over, away from his comforting body heat and grabbed the device. You could feel the demon's eyes traveling along the back of your neck as you read the caller ID. Seeing “Lixie Baby” lighting up the screen you felt yourself getting giddy, having missed your best friend more than you’d realized. Accepting the call and holding the phone up to your ear you cooed “My baby! I missed you so much~” your words earned a deep chuckle from the other side, causing a warm smile to settle against your lips.

“I missed you too Angel, did you do the ritual? Have you been getting your guts rearranged too well to respond to your soulmate?” he teased, trying his best to sound offended at his implications and you let out your own chuckle in response. You heard a slight growl escape the demon behind you and his grip on your hip tightened before he pulled you back towards him. You were pressed flush against his bare chest, his exposed cock pressing into the back of your thigh with how tightly he held your body against his own.

Jisung felt a weird feeling bubbling in his chest when he heard how you spoke lovingly to the other person on the call. It wasn’t anger or anything like that, It was a new feeling. It was something that he’d never felt before and if he was being completely honest, he didn’t like it. It made his stomach twist in tight and uncomfortable knots and the fact that he had started feeling new, weird feelings since meeting you made him frustrated. The only way he knew how to cure frustrations was sex, as a sex demon, it made sense. A bubbling desire to get rid of these disgusting feelings and replace them with much better feelings was what influenced his actions at this moment.

Ignoring the way he held you possessively as you continued your conversation but you decided not to pull away from his toned body, allowing him to manhandle you in whatever way he desired. “God Lixie, why are you so concerned about me getting laid? Do you need that book back so you can get your dick wet and hop off mine?” you teased and you could just hear Felix pouting on the other side as a soft giggle left your lips. Your conversation continued like this, teasing each other in a flirty manner like you two normally did, as you felt Jisung nosing against the crook of your neck where it connected to your shoulder. The flesh under his nose and lips was still painted in red and purple marks, memorializing the night you had just shared with the demon mere hours ago.

A shiver traveled down your spine when his tongue slipped out from between his lips and began tracing the marks on your skin in soft kitten licks and you swatted at Jisung’s hip in an attempt to get him to stop. He was having none of that and you could feel him smirk against your skin at your poor attempt. He began trailing his hand that was resting on your hip down between the plush of your thighs and using his nails to dig into the supple flesh, pulling your legs apart and using his elbow to keep you from letting your legs shut again. He kept your knee bent and your foot firmly planted against the mattress behind your other knee that was still resting comfortably on its side on the bed, the space between your legs forming a triangle shape.

While Felix went on a bit of a tangent and you listened intently, you took his yapping as a chance to pull your phone away from your ear and mute your mic so you could speak to Jisung without Felix’s knowledge. “Jisung. Stop it now. Can’t you see I'm on the phone?!” you scolded him in a whisper and you felt his cock twitch against the meat of your ass in response before he spoke.

“Trust me, I can see that very clearly and since you don’t want to get off the phone when I ask nicely, you get to stay on the phone and be good for me instead.” he growled out against the shell of your ear that was newly exposed from removing the phone from it. “What the fuck are you talking about sung?” you asked slightly annoyed and very confused about what he meant. Sensing your confusion he continued, “You’re going to continue your conversation while I use your pretty body however I want as a punishment for not listening. You don’t want little Lixie to find out about the demon in your bed right? So you better be really good at hiding how good I'm making you feel.” with his words, he unmuted your phone right as you heard Felix calling out to you for a response, sensing you’d been quiet a little too long.

“Sorry Lix, I had to feed Soonie. I’m listening, don't worry.” you didn’t have a chance to argue as you fell back into listening and paying attention to the rest of Felix’s story but you did your best to hide your arousal at Jisungs words and luckily Felix didn’t catch it but you were almost positive a certain demon had when you heard another growl ripping from his throat. Jisung wasted no time once he heard Felix continue to ramble, his fingers slipping into the waistband of your sleep shorts and your into underwear.

He used his fingertips to swipe through your folds, collecting your slick arousal on his fingers as lube before begging to rub slow, teasing circles against your sensitive bundle of nerves. Your breath caught in your throat and you had to bite down on your lower lip to keep a moan from escaping. Jisungs tongue went back to traveling across your neck and shoulder, sucking and nipping at the unmarked skin and causing more reds and purples to erupt just under the surface of your skin.

“Angel? Are you okay? I heard you gasp, what happened?” concern and worry laced your best friend's voice and you had to use all of your power to focus on him and will your voice to remain steady as you spoke. “Y-yeah…” hearing your own stutter, you cleared your throat before continuing. “All is good Sunshine, just um… get scratched by Soonie… seems like she wants to p-play a bit too rough for how early it is… but I’m okay. Carry on with your story. How did Hyune respond to that?” you silently begged him not to push further and you looked at Jisung over your shoulder with a warning to stop, but he was having too much fun watching you struggle to contain your sounds.

At that exact moment the demon decided to push just the tips of his index and middle finger inside of your entrance, using a scissoring motion to tease you open for him. You had to screw your eyes shut as your body shivered and your jaw went slack with a silent moan. “That’s my baby~ you’re doing so good for me.” Jisung whispered against your neck quiet enough to not be picked up by the mic on your phone but loud enough for you to hear. He swiftly rolled you onto your back and your eyes met his in a heated, lust filled stare off as you watched him move down the expanse of your body before he stopped with his face only incessantly from your core. Your eyes were practically begging him to let you get off the phone before progressing further and he shook his head with a tsk.

Your eyes stayed on his as he began pressing open mouthed kisses to the wet spot forming on the thin fabric of your shorts just above your sensitive bud. Your jaw went slack in a silent moan at the sensation and your eyes rolled back into your head momentarily, your reaction only urging him to continue with his languid teasing. He began to make out with your clothed clit and your arm started to drop causing your phone to leave your ear for a moment and he used his sharp canines to nip slightly at the bundle of nerves. Your eyes shot back open and went wide as you stared down at him with a look to ask “what the fuck?”

He didn’t stop his tongue and lips from their languid dance along the slick soaked fabric, eyes still locked on yours as he spoke. “I said to stay on the phone. Keep the phone to your ear, now.” a whimper slipped from your lips in response to his raspy voice, attaching the phone back to its place against your ear and you heard a nervous chuckle leave Felix.

“H-hey um… if you’re busy w-we can always call later…” he sounded a bit out of breath when he spoke, almost like he was panting and before you could respond with a yes, jisung nipped at your clit again causing your body to jolt in response. “N-no Lixie… I- I’m good to k-keep talking. What were y-you saying again?” you hadn’t been able to pay attention to anything the other male was saying but he continued nevertheless. Jisung seemed pleased with this so he finally removed your drenched shorts and panties, wasting no time before attaching his mouth to your bare heat.

He let out a low growl that caused vibrations to shoot through you as soon as he could taste you. He was acting feral at your taste, lapping at your juices and sucking on your clit with slurping sounds like a man starved. It quickly became impossible to keep quiet with the way Jisung skillfully worked his tongue against you and inside your tight hole. Wanton moans began to rip out of your chest and your phone fell onto the bed as both your hands slipped into Jisung’s midnight blue locks, tugging his face against your core, grinding on his nose and tongue.

A growl erupted from the demon between your legs when he noticed that you had discarded the phone and he pulled away, earning a high pitched whine from you. You looked at him with confusion, the room growing quiet and you could hear distant grunts and huffs filling the air. That’s when it hit you, you were still on the phone with Felix and you’d gotten so lost in Jisung’s mouth that you hadn’t tried to contain the sounds of your pleasure. You face grew red as you scrambled to pick up the phone, Felix's moans filling your ear and causing your core to gush at the sounds. Jisung let out a chuckle at your reaction and watched your throbbing bundle of nerves and your hole clenching around nothing at your ruined orgasm.

“L-lixie?” you asked softly and cautiously. You were beyond embarrassed and didn't know how to approach the topic of what was happening. “Fuck angel… you sound so good i just- i can’t help myself.” his voice was more whiny than you’d ever heard before. “M-maybe we should just c-call later?” you asked him in a shaky voice, slight wince on your face in fear.

Before Felix even had a chance to respond, Jisung was grabbing your phone. “Felix was it?” he purred into the phone, Felix's moans quietly continuing on the other side before stopping abruptly when he heard the much deeper voice, earning a devilish smirk from the demon still planted between your thighs. You couldn’t hear if Felix was responding or not as you watched Jisung begin nipping at the sensitive skin on the inside of your thighs, your body jolting at the sharp sting that followed each one.

“hmmmm why don’t you come join us? I'm sure my doll will be more than happy to have both of us at once.” and Jisung hung up before anything further could be said. Your eyes went wide as the cocky smirk remained on his face.

“WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT JI!? HE'S MY BEST FRIEND!” You tried to sit up and pull your heat away from him but he was quicker in digging his nails into your hip bones slightly to hold you in place, his face so close that every word he spoke caused hot air to stick to the slick that covered your core.

“No need to pretend that you don’t want each other. Remember, it’s my job to serve you sexually so I know what you truly desire since sealing our contract. The contract allows me to hear every single want and need that your body holds.” he finished what he was saying and placed a light kiss to your still throbbing bud, eliciting a whimper from you. “I-it’s not like he’ll actually sh-show” you mumbled out between the kitten licks Jisung delivered between your folds, barely allowing the tip of his tongue to graze your most sensitive spots and teasing you further. Your body was heating up again as you grew more desperate to be touched properly.

“Trust me doll, he will show.” he purred and returned back to eating you out. He wasn’t nearly as ravenous as before, teasing you with soft licks, light suckles, and barely placing his index finger against your entrance and tugging slightly at the ring but never fully slipping his digits inside. He kept up his teasing and edging to the point of tears slipping from your eyes, begging him to do more but never earning such a reward.

This torture went on for about 10 minutes and you were beyond the point of soft tears, you were practically wailing for him to give you more as your doorbell rang. Your eyes shot open wide, meeting with the demon's slanted eyes and he pulled away from you just enough to speak but letting his words fall against your core. “Come in!” he called out through the apartment.

“What the fuck!? we don’t know who-“ you were cut off by a panting felix in your bedroom doorway. He looked like he’d ran all the way there, cock still tenting his sweats as he took in the sight before him. “L-lix…” you spoke through your tears, jisung taking a moment to suck harshly at your swollen bud and causing you to let out another moan and a cry.

Unfortunately you didn’t get any relief as Jisung climbed off the bed and sat in the desk chair in your room. His eyes were locked on the blonde male as your soaked core was on display, Felix's eyes never leaving you and your body began to heat up in embarrassment. You went to close your thighs and cover yourself up but Jisung let out a low guttural growl, causing you to let your knees fall back to the bed and opening your core up yet again.

“Well, don’t just stand there. Get to work, make my baby feel good~” Jisung purred out, unknowingly adding extra weight to the “my'' and shifted his hips forward in his seat, his monstrous cock on full display. Luckily Felix didn’t seem fazed at all by a literal demon sitting in your room so he made quick work to stalk over to your bed and slotting himself between your open thighs.

“God, you’re so fucking pretty like this~ tears and all.” Felix praised as he caged your body to the bed, pressing his clothed cock against your fully soaked and exposed core. He kissed the tears off your cheeks before catching your jutted out lower lip between his teeth. He pulled at your swollen and pouty lower lip slightly, earning a whimper from you as your hands shot into his long blonde hair and pulled his face closer. Your lips danced together in a fierce battle of dominance, your need overpowering your embarrassment in the situation as you were finally being touched properly.

Felix began rocking his hips against you, deep groans slipping into your open mouth, silvia dripping down both of your chins and down your chest. You desperately needed more after the extensive teasing from Jisung, your hands moving to Felix’s hips and pulling him painfully closer, the barrier of his clothing becoming too much as the grinding continued. The grinding and kissing just wasn’t enough and it was slightly embarrassing to know that you were acting like you were in heat with your frantic movements. You needed to feel full, needed to cum, needed Felix to fuck you open on his cock.

“L-lixie please… need you now… inside please…” you begged against his lips like you were going to go insane if he didn’t hurry up and honestly, you were convinced you might. “You… fuck- you have to let go of me first so I can take off my pants angel-“ his words hit your lips since you’d refused to let him separate from you at all and you reluctantly let go of your vice grip on him with a desperate whine when you felt his body heat leave you.

Jisung remained seated as he watched you cling desperately to the smaller blonde male. At first it was funny watching your desperation as the other fumbled through his movements, clearly he wouldn’t be able to appease you like he did but then he watched as Felix removed his clothes to reveal a toned build and a decent sized cock, causing Jisung to gulp.

When Jisung first saw the man entering your room in a fluffy sweater and gray sweats, he looked far too soft and sweet to be a satisfying partner for how wild you were. He didn’t expect him to have much experience or to be as hung as he was. He was nowhere near as big as Jisung but he definitely had a solid hand of cards to play with. Jisung looked at you and the way you drooled over just the sight of Felix’s cock made his chest tighten uncomfortably.

He remained in his spot as he watched Felix settle back between your legs after stripping and you began rolling your hips along his cock the same way you’d done with Jisung that first time. He hadn’t realized how tight his grip had gotten on the armrests of your desk chair until he felt them snap under his grip, breaking off from the rest of the chair. His focus fell to the crumbling price of black plastic that now rested in his palm and with his focus off of you and Felix, he was able to realize just how tight his chest had grown.

It felt harder to breathe and his stomach was tangled in knots so tight he was sure they’d push any food up and out of his throat. A growl rumbled through his chest, that feeling of almost anger was back again and bubbling painfully against his rib cage, yet he still couldn’t place what exactly it was. He was snapped out of his thoughts when he heard you screaming out a name that wasn’t his.

“Fuck! Felix- oh my god! you feel so fucking good-" Your screams earned low grunts from your best friend as his hips continued to snap into you harshly, the sound of skin slapping mixed with your wanton moans and his deep groans began filling the room. The smell of sex flooded Jisung’s nose as he struggled to contain himself with the sounds being made and watching you fall apart on Felix’s cock.

Hearing how good another man, a mere human, was making you feel made his blood boil. He hated every second of this, something that was supposed to just be fun was painful to him now. He’s had plenty of threesomes before so this wasn’t anything new but the way he was seeing red as he watched Felix bring you to the brink of your orgasm? That was definitely new. How long has this been going on? Why did he do this? He was ready to tear Felix’s head from his body, he needed to stop this-

“FUCK! Yes lix~ j-just like that! I-I’m gonna- ngghh” you clenched around Felix's cock as your body was sent over the edge, muscles on fire as you came all over his cock. The clenching of your walls as you worked through your high brought Felix to his own orgasm and he pulled out, painting your chest and stomach with his long white ropes. Your body trembled as Felix pulled out with a slight wince and let his body collapse next to you, both of your chests heaving while trying to catch your breath.

“God- I can't believe we never did that.” you mumbled still trying to catch your breath, a soft chuckle following. “We definitely need to do this again Angel~” he hummed with a flirting tint to his voice. He rolled over to look at you, eyes landing on the demon in the process, fear plaguing his body at what he saw.

Jisung’s eyes were a glowing neon pink, fangs visible as he bit down on his lip, blood pouring down his chin and forming a puddle in the ridges of his abs. He saw that the chair was now missing arm rests and bits of black plastic were crumbled on the floor beside the chair.

The sight made Felix tense up and freeze, cold sweats prickling from his pores. You noticed the rigidity of Felix’s body when he froze next to you, opening your eyes again and you met those of the demon on the other side of the room. It was odd how you didn’t feel scared, the same eyes that’d haunted you in the beginning now making you coo internally. Why did he look like a kicked puppy to you?

“Sungie~” you called out softly and held out your hand for him. The lack of terror you exhibited made Felix not only petrified but beyond confused as well. Jisung looked at you, his expression softening for only a moment. It was so quick that you’d miss it if you blinked, but you’d caught it. He really was just a big puppy under that scary dog exterior.

“Come here please? I need my sungie~'' Your voice still showed how tired you were but remained soft and sweet, your focus was entirely on Jisung now and you’d almost forgotten Felix was still laying in your bed. “I-i’m gonna go before he kills me…” Felix’s voice came out shaky but his fear kept him frozen to his place. “No, Lix you stay right there.” you spoke softly, eyes trained on Jisung who still had yet to move.

“Jisung.” your voice was stern and Jisung couldn’t help but react to the dominance in your voice. Slowly rising from his seat and stalking over to you, same terrifying energy radiating off of him, expression remaining harsh to felix but you could see deeper. He wasn’t angry, he was hurt and all you wanted to do was hold him and cover his face in kisses, comfort him and make him feel better.

Jisung made it over to the bed before stopping at the side, body still rigid and powerful in his stance and his eyes flicked over to Felix, causing him to jump back a bit in fear. He couldn’t understand what the fuck was happening and he just really wanted to leave alive but you’d told him to stay and surely you’d never let him die… right?

Once Jisung was in front of you, you looked up at him through half closed lids, still feeling tiredness weighing your body down. You wrapped your extended hand around his wrist and yanked him towards you. His body fell foreword and he had to put his free hand next to your head on the pillows to keep himself from falling on you completely. Your lips collided in a searing kiss, teeth audibly classing together as your tongue slipped between the seam of his lips.

The intensity of your lips on his had him almost melting as an animalistic growl was ripped from his throat and swallowed by your open mouth. His tongue began to push against yours in a heated battle of control, your tongues caught in the small space between your lips as the rolled against one another. A moan left you through the exchange of saliva as your tongues remained on full display for the blonde who was hypnotized by the erotic exchange and Jisung began to climb on top of your still spent body.

Felix could feel his cock coming back to life as he watched the both of you battling for dominance. He couldn’t help himself as his hand made its way down his body and began to lightly tug at his over sensitive member, completely hypnotized by the two of you. Jisung easily found his place between your legs, the puddle of your orgasm under his knees and the release that painted your skin becoming sticky as it dried between your bodies.

Jisung continued to hold himself up with his hands planted on either side of your head as the kiss continued to get even sloppier and more intense as it went on, more groans and growls leaving the demon as he was trying desperately to regain control of the situation. You could feel that he wasn’t going to give up so easy, an idea popping into your head causing you to smirk against his lips.

One of your hands left where they’d rested on his tiny waist, making its way up to his throat and wrapping around the soft flesh and squeezing tightly. A whimper left the demon and you could feel his body shudder against yours and almost melt into you. You took the chance to take over completely, your tongue sliding into his mouth and licking every surface it could reach.

You began to roll your hips against him as he continued to slip into a more submissive headspace. He continued to let out whimpers and whines as he let you do whatever you wanted to him, becoming putty in your hands. The sounds he let out were a harsh contrast to th noises you’d gotten used to hearing. His growls and groans were definitely capable of making you weak in the knees but hearing him sounding so needy and desperate ignited a new kind of fire in you.

Finally separating your lips with Jisung chasing after your touch again, cock still leaking againt you heat and turning more of your body as messy as your kiss had gotten. You were looking up at the demon, body covered in Felix’s cum, a mix of both yours and Jisung’s saliva, and the essence of your arousal mixed with the copious amounts of pre-cum that’d began pouring out of Jisung’s pretty pink cock.

“Why don’t you be a good boy and show Lixie here how good you fuck me hmmmm?” you purred out, his jealousy still radiating off of him. You wanted to reassure him that you are genuinely more than satisfied by just him and the best way to do that for a sex demon was to let them show off and feel the truth in your words than to just hear them.

This got Jisung to perk up, the hurt puppy look leaving him as he glanced over to see Felix stroking his cock at the show that you two had just put on. He couldn’t help but take a moment to admire the blonde, sitting obediently and watching, being a good boy for you just because you’d told him to stay. The power you held over your bestfriend in just a few words had Jisung enamored and a fluttery and warm feeling began to erupt in his chest. He felt a sense of pride mixed with the weird and warm feelings as he looked back to you, the dominance in your gaze piercing through him and making him feel a bit exposed.

Feeling exposed wasn’t something Jisung was used to despite the fact that he'd always been striding around completely naked but this was a different kind of exposure. It felt like you'd tore his still beating heart from his chest and held it so delicately in your palms despite the fact that you could so easily in that moment treat the organ with no care and even squeeze it a bit harder in your clutches and end him, ruin him, break him and his soul with such an easy movement but you actively choose not to. You choose to be gentle, treat it with care, treat it with love, treat him with such care and love…

Love… Is that the feeling he feels? Does he love you?

He held onto that idea as he felt you wrap those pretty, delicate, fingers around the base of his cock and guiding his tip to your entrance. Again, your touch was gentle and kind, your eyes were soft and alluring without any harshness to them. You looked at him and watched him in a way he’d never experienced before. There was something in your gaze that was reaching out to him and he wanted so desperately to figure out how to take a hold of that and never let it go.

Jisung pushed into you slowly all the way to the hilt, pushing his hips flush against your ass as he bottomed out, a small hiss slipping from between your teeth from the pain of his size and the overstimulation. Jisung stilled for a moment and watched as you adjusted to him yet again, once you nodded he slowly began to pull out until just his tip remained inside of you. You took a moment to reach out and grab Felix’s free hand that wasn’t wrapped around his cock and guided his small hand to your lower stomach, pressing his palm against your skin. Felix looked at you confused as you held his hand in place with gently pressure and looked to Jisung again.

“Let him feel just how well you fill me up Sung~ Let him feel just how well that demon cock rearranges my guts.” your voice still purred in a sultry tone but it became a bit more airy as your arousal began to course through your veins again. Jisung didn’t need to be told twice before bottoming out again and angling his hips upward to rub against the sweet spot inside of you, causing that familiar bulge in your abdomen to push against Felix’s hand and wanton moans to begin to fall from yout lips as he set a slow but hard rhythm to his thrusts.

To say Felix was shocked was an understatement, even as your hands gripped the blankets underneath you, his hand remained and his cock continued to leak in his fist. He could feel Jisung’s cock carving out your insides and your body heating up as you got closer to your orgasm. Jisung felt you teetering on the edge too as he picked up his speed, doing exactly the right things to have your orgasm crashing into you full force before you’d expected it.

“Yes! Fuck sung! Just like that thats my good boy! I-Im gonna-” you were cut off as the force of your orgasm kncked the wind out of you and your jaw opening into a silent scream as you came all over the demon’s cock and covered his abs in your squirt. “God fuck doll- your milking my cock so good. I’m gonna fuck you full of my cum just like you beg for, like my good fucking slut!” Jisung’s voice was strained as he worked you through your high, the grip on his cock almost painful as a few more sharp thrusts were delivered straight to your thuroughly abused sweet spot and he was toppling over the edge himself.

He came inside of you hard and Felix let out a gasp as he could feel the force of Jisung’s cum from where his hand remained pressed against your abdomen and that feeling had him rfeaching his second orgasm of the night. He painted his own abdomen in hot white ropes and a deep groan ripping through him as his thighs began twitching at the intensity of it. He lazily tugged at his cock through the after shocks before collapsing backwards on the bed and Jisung pulled out of you with a whine from his own overstimulation.

Out of the three of you, Jisung recovered the quickest. He only had to take a few moments of panting to catch his breath and relaxing back against the end of the bed frame as he watched you and Felix trying to recover. You were trembling and panting heavily, eyes shut in exhaustion and felix was pretty much in the exact same boat, both of you were covered in sweat and various bodily fluids but Jisung couldn’t help but smile softly and that warm fluttery feeling returned.

“I love you” he spoke without realizing and your head snapped up off the pillows, eyes wide and meeting his own set of wide eyes. As you tried to figure out if you'd heard him right, he was launching himself off the bed and running out of the door. He slammed the door behind him as he fled, the force behind it causing the wood of the door frame it crack and splint as your body jolted at the volume of it all. “Did- did he just…” you began, still blinking away the shock.

You could hear a burst of wind in your living room, clattering of objects hitting the walls and the scraping of your furniture moving against your wooden floors. Jisung had went back to the underworld. He’d just vanished without another word. The realization settling into your gut painfully as felix jumped at the loud sounds and your bedroom door flying back open thanks to the broken doorframe unable to hold it closed. After the sounds stopped and your apartment fell eerily quiet again, felix spoke.

“He just told you he loved you… you- Y/Nnie you tamed an incubus…” felix spoke in his own form of shock, hes studied demons and other mythological creatures for years and its insanely rare for any demon to be tamed by a mortal but somehow, you, his best friend had done it. Felix met your teary, wide eyes and pulled you into a hug. Even after everything that just happened, Felix was still your bestfriend and platonic soulmate and he was still by your side as you began to cry, tears and snot surely covering the bare skin of his chest as you were overwhelmed with so many emotions you couldn't explain.

“I- I love him too lix… how- how do i show him? How do i get him to come back? I- I can’t lose him lix…” your body trembled as you sobbed harder against Felix’s body and he rubbed soothing circles into the skin of your back until you calmed down. “Why don’t you go take a shower and get all my cum off of you, then ill take one and get all… my cum off me too and then we can figure this out. You're sticky and gross.” his nose scrunched up at the sight of his mostly dry cum on your skin and his own skin covered in his half dry cum as well. You let out a laugh and wiped all the snot and tears from your face before nodding and leaving the room to take your shower.

Tag list: @clemissleepy @dontaskmemybias @venandi-143 @allysluvsworld @h0n3yj4y @skzstay-lix @linocvp1d @palindrome969 @blankdyean @stayp1ece143 @channieandhisgoonsquad @seeeeking-skz @anjian03 @hanjis-blog @loeyscock @hanjisunglover @enjaken @httpdwaekki @sunnyhonie @somehowalivelmao @cookiesnmilfx @whosanaanyway

[purrvaire]

they're so in love im gonna throw up real quick

[be-gay-do-crime-ahaha]

Holy fucking shit the dysphoria is dysphoria-ing right now. I feel physically nauseous oh my fucking god. I’m gonna fucking kill someone maybe myself rn I’m gonna lose my shit holy hell.

Doesn’t help that I’ve been incredibly overstimulated the past few days every sound is like a fucking cheese grater in my ears oh my god.

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[queer-omens-in-the-archives]

I hope your week gets better 🫂

thank TwT

[noriakicatkyoin]

if i make this fic be released chapter by chapter itll be the first time i wrote a fic with proper proper chapters in almost 4 years 1. fucking disgusting i was 15 almost 4 years ago. 2. this would in fact make it easier to write but my control freak self would not be able to make major retroactive edits and thus would have to trust myself and stop editing 14 million times. hideous task but a possible one

[the-acid-pear]

Having davesport thoughts............

[lokischocolatefountain]

Denial || Men Like Me

Part 2 of the Men Like Me series. Part 1

Masterlist

Fandom: The Last of Us Pairing: Joel Miller x Virgin!Reader Rating: 18+ Warnings: girthy age gap, virgin!reader, eventual loss of virginity (not in this chapter), masturbation (male & female), cis fem reader, descriptions of reader's body, somewhat creepy!Joel, fetishization of youth, dom!Joel, Joel ignores you until he can't, slightly insecure reader, very insecure Joel, corruption kink, mild fem!dom, reader turns the tables a little, name calling, fetishization of virginity, face fucking (not the mouth, but cheek), kneeling, stripping, moneyshot, fingering, sexual discoveries. Word count: 10.4k Summary: After your steamy encounter, Joel ignores you out of guilt, leaving you feeling unworthy. But you make a discovery that makes you turn the tables on him. A/N: The reception that chapter 1 got gave me enough serotonin to keep me going, you guys. I hope everyone likes this chapter at least half as much if not as much as the first one. Even the half would give me a lot of joy. And do say hi in my inbox or my asks. I would loooove to talk about these two. As always, pleaaaaaase give me reblog and/or a comment to recharge my writing batteries. Most importantly, a big thanks to @tobuildahomeinthewoods because the smut part was from their idea in the last chapter's comments .

“Long day, huh?” 

“What?” you asked, your brain taking a second too long to process the words. “Yeah. Yeah, yeah,” you said, going back to your glass of whiskey. 

“I heard about the kids. They gotta be more careful,” Tommy said, looking to his brother for some kind of confirmation. Joel nodded hesitantly, his eyes looking everywhere but you as he traced the rim of his glass with his middle finger. So cavalier like he didn’t fuck you with that very finger. Asshole. 

“Yeah, yeah. Climbing trees is not wise,” you agreed, willing yourself to look away from his brother. You didn’t want to get caught staring, or worse glaring. The chatter of the dinner crowd at the Tipsy Bison drowned into the sound of you tapping your fingers on the wood counter of the bar. You got up abruptly, the bar stool going down from the force of your actions. You bent over to pick it up, a hand moving to your chest instinctively to keep from flashing everyone. With no such protection for your ass, you could feel familiar eyes on them. Eyes that you’d become accustomed to having on you no matter the distance. 

“You ok–” Tommy began, but you cut him off.

“You have a good one, Tommy,” you said, grabbing your bag from the bar counter and slinging it over your shoulder. “I gotta go. I’m really tired.” 

Like the fool that you were, you picked your glass up and downed the rest of the whiskey, your throat rejecting the choice with a cough that had you spit out half of the burning liquor. Great. Now you’d have to wash your scrubs before going to bed so it didn’t stain. Fucking great. 

There were some protests from the younger Miller brother, some words of concern. But you ignored him as you hurried out of the Tipsy Bison and into the night. At least one of the Millers had some manners. And it wasn’t the one that broke into your house and showed you what a clitoris was. It was fucking embarrassing that he was ignoring you after that. Even more embarrassing that you had to learn it from a random guy when you were the one poring over anatomy textbooks trying to become a doctor. You should know anatomy better than anyone else. Your mentor should’ve taught you. You’d learned how to conduct a safe childbirth. Even been allowed to close up the last c-section patient. But you didn’t fucking learn how the baby got in there. 

Alright well, you did. But you hadn’t been told about some of the especially sensitive parts of the body that would be involved in the process. 

You tossed your bag on your couch, got yourself some cookies that you traded for last week and climbed up the stairs to your bedroom. It wasn’t a nutritious dinner, but it filled your tummy. It came in handy when you didn’t want to spend time chopping vegetables and boiling pasta or whatever the hell you had to do to cook. 

Your bedroom had become your prison in the last two weeks. You felt trapped, unable to see beyond it. How could you, when it ironically was right here that you found freedom? 

Even as you did something as mundane as eating cookies on bed and spilled crumbs on your sheets like a child, the chair in front of your dressing table was in sight. From where you sat, you could see very clearly the scratch on the black paint that revealed the light wood underneath. Evidence of how you had to hold on to dear life as Joel worked your pussy expertly. Like he knew it as well as he knew the tools of his trade. Like weaving his fingers between your folds was as familiar to him as it was for you to weave through skin with your suture needle and thread.

You felt yourself dripping at the mere memory of his thick fingers pumping away inside you, unraveling the fibers of your being. The sight of him at the bar– his finger tracing the rim of the glass– it took you to the memory of that very finger teasing your pussy.

The pornographic magazines, the entertainment for men, no longer saw the light of day from their box under your bed. Pictures of nude women you wanted to model yourself after in order to be attractive to men no longer sufficed. All you strived for now was to be attractive to him. To be strung like a puppet in his hands while all he seemed to want was to get away from any place where you were. 

You felt a pang in your chest as you recalled the first time you went to the house of worship after your time with Joel to find that he’d been replaced with the younger Miller. Tears stung in your eyes as you felt rejected by his absence. Like he no longer wanted to be in the same room as you, hammer nails into wood as you spoke to your fellow townspeople about their wellbeing. You told yourself it was just a temporary thing. That the brothers just liked to alternate shifts and he would return soon to fix the windows that shattered during a storm in the winter. 

He never came. 

You’d never experienced such rejection before. You’d never wanted before. To want was to risk rejection, to feel the pit in your stomach as you felt now. You never wanted to feel less than, undesirable, unwanted. So you pulled away from all the men you dated. If you could even call that dating. Maybe it was your own fault for thinking it would be easier with Joel. What did you think? That he would fold immediately because you showed off your legs and touched his arm and pushed your breasts out to present your femininity? 

Naive, stupid girl. 

“Been experiencing longer than you’ve been alive, Ma’am.” 

Something twisted in your belly and you lied down, pulling your covers over you as though it would contain the shame coursing through you. 

You probably looked silly to him, like a little girl playing adult. Like a kitten picking a fight with a lion. Less than half his age, just a fucking preschooler on outbreak day when he would’ve been a fully grown man. Maybe already beginning to gray, the skin by his eyes crinkled from the years he spent smiling at and wooing women. Why would he want a girl? He’d want a real woman. Someone like Tommy’s wife, perhaps. Someone he wouldn’t have to teach.

“Don’t know your own fucking body but you want a man?” his taunt rang cold in your ear, sending chills down your spine like he was still behind you, fingers buried deep inside the most intimate part of you. You pressed your thighs together, heat pooling between them as it always happened when you thought of what he did to you. 

Shame didn’t deter you as you brought your fingers to your pussy, brushing one against your clit with curiosity. With fear. It felt so good, like its sole purpose went beyond the animal need to survive and propagate. You bypassed it to touch your weeping slit, more comfortable with what you were already used to for carnal pleasure.

Your own fingers had always been enough. Out in the wilderness when you needed to release pent up energy. After long days at the clinic and sharing notes with the other students. When you were tired to the point where you couldn’t sleep. Your fingers always took you to where you needed. You were always satisfied.  

Not anymore. 

You whined as the different angles you tried failed to work. The physical pleasure was the same. But not quite like how it felt with him. His hand was larger, his fingers longer and thicker. He showed you sports inside you that you’d never been able to touch yourself. Maybe this was what people meant when they said ignorance was bliss. Knowledge of pleasure you could have but couldn’t give yourself was torture.

As much as you resented Joel now, you couldn’t help but conjure images of him as you brought yourself closer to release. His deep brown eyes, his large hand that he wrapped around your throat, the way he carried you from your chair and deposited you on your bed. Like a human being weighed nothing to him. Like you were his toy that he could bury his fingers in, play with and set aside when he was done, when he was bored. Entertainment for Men came to your mind again and you cried like you never had at your own touch. 

Your thighs trembled as you imagined yourself as one of those women in the magazines, but only for him. Entertainment for Joel. Splayed out on the center page for him to look at and fuck his hand to. You wouldn’t mind being tangible entertainment. Laid out on his bed, limbs arranged in an attractive manner for him, so he could access whatever part of your body he wanted to play with. To be bent to his will and fucked, to be used, given an affectionate pat on your pussy and put away when you’d outlasted his needs only to be given attention when he wanted to get off the next time. 

You shook uncontrollably, your eyes squeezed shut and the world went blank as you reached your peak. You pulled your spare pillow to your chest, needing some physical comfort after experiencing such a high. You wished it were him instead of an inanimate object. That he would make you feel good and hold you and kiss you all over. That he would stay when you woke up the next day and do it all over again. 

Once the haze of your orgasm cleared up, you cringed at the feelings it had brought out of you. How stupid… Wanting a man who broke in, fucked you with his fingers, and began ignoring you like you did something horrible to him. Fuck Joel Miller and fucking his stupid fucking face. As he said, there were other men in the town. Men who wouldn’t ignore you.

⌘

“How are the windows lookin’?” 

“Fixed ‘em up in time for the cold winds. No thanks to you, fuckin’ asshole.” 

“Sorry. Y’know I ain’t the church going type.” It wasn’t a lie. He wasn’t the church kind before Sarah died and he certainly wasn’t anymore. That the young aspiring doctor he fingered in her bedroom was the real reason behind him swapping work would remain his secret.

“Yeah, yeah,” Tommy grumbled, playing with the now cold fries on his plate. “It ain’t a church, by the way. Maria keeps correctin’ me. It’s the house of worship.” 

Joel rolled his eyes at that. He got the reasoning behind it. The town had people who believed in different Gods and had different religions. Calling the place a Church would be as unfair as calling it a– whatever, he didn’t know any other kind of place for worship. But it still pissed him off when his little brother came to him and went on about something his wife said.

Go off and do whatever your wife tells you, motherfucker.

No matter how he tried, the snide voice in his head that hated Maria never went away. He never said anything to her or Tommy. Maria was decent to him too, unlike the time he first arrived with Ellie. She trusted him with Miles. Invited him and Ellie over to family dinners. But they kept their interactions to a minimum, as though there’d been a silent agreement that it was best they kept it civil so as to not sow discord in the family. 

“Whatever. No point in worshiping, be it Jesus or whatever stuff they got goin’ these days.”

A shudder went down his spine, triggered by the talk of religion. As it became colder, Ellie had begun to revert to the empty shell of a child she was after the events in Colorado. There’d been grifters in the past hiding behind religion to cheat people out of their money, to damage children irreparably while preaching the word of God. The end of the fucking world somehow didn’t stop them from going on. Didn’t stop people from believing that an all-knowing, all-powerful guy in the sky was still watching and would protect them. 

If what protected people was God, guns were God. And Molotov cocktails. Sharp rocks and shoelaces.

Ellie didn’t tell him much, but from what he could piece together, it was a religious group with one guy leading them. And they were fuckin’ cannibals. Sounded like a goddamn cult.

“It’s a nice place to meet people,” said Tommy, snapping him out of his descent into the void of the recent past. 

Joel simply snorted and took a sip of his glass of water. He couldn’t handle his alcohol like he used to. Age and that he had been off his usual cocktail of oxy and whiskey for a long time now. He had to resort to having a lot of water to sober himself up after the occasional evening drinks with Tommy. 

“What? It is! I go there, catch up with everyone in town. Usually people go there when they’re going through some shit. It makes them feel conscious if you visit their house. So I just run into ‘em at the Chu– house of worship– and I just talk to them about their lives ‘n see if there’s anything I can do for them.” 

“Guess you’re right,” he said, slotting his thumbnail in the ridges on the bar counter absentmindedly, scraping off bits of the old softening wood. 

He could go again. Only so many days he could ignore you. But the reminder of the shame coursing through his veins when he saw you this evening made him shake the thoughts off. There was no way he could be anywhere you were without shriveling up and dying of embarrassment. 

You were so young.

Relatively unblemished by the world. A fuckin’ virgin. Never known the touch of a man and moaning his name as you touched yourself. 

Nope, nope, nope. Shouldn't have gone there, he thought as he felt himself hardening in his pants. Shouldn’t his dick be non-functional by now? He was dangerously close to sixty and spent a good two decades without adequate nutrition. Shouldn’t that be enough to turn his dick limp forever?

“Come over tomorrow, then. We’re doin’ a little memorial thing in the back of the house of worship. That young doctor’s idea, actually. She put the idea forward at the last council meeting. Thinks it’ll help people to have something physical to remember their people by.” 

Young, sweet, and so fucking thoughtful. 

Not meant for men like him.

Yet he went the next day. 

The topic of Sarah hung in the air around him and Tommy like a fog beyond which they couldn’t see. It sat heavy in his chest, the memory of his baby and worse, everything his shit brain had forgotten. He remembered that she gave him shit, mocked him over everything. But she didn’t have a voice in his head anymore. He could describe the sweetness of her voice, but it no longer sounded out in his mind. No matter how hard he tried. 

Her favorite color was purple and she loved soccer. He couldn’t recall the name of her team. She loved reading. He didn’t remember her favorite author. She liked animated movies. He couldn’t remember a single one. Just the vague memory of her falling asleep on his lap as cartoon characters chirped away on tv. Even her face was beginning to blur. When he recalled her features, it was only through images of the last seconds of her life.

“We could just do alphabetical order. Simple.” 

“Not really,” you said, scribbling lines on the paper. “We get new people in the town sometimes and we don’t want the names they add to stand out, away from the alphabetically ordered list. Might make them feel bad.”

“Yeah, you’re right. What about age?” Tommy suggested. 

“Still the same problem. It would force newcomers to have their own separate list at the bottom.” 

“How about a first come first serve system? We tell people when we’re taking names down for the memorial and they can come over, form a queue and give us the names they want included. That way, people can keep the names of the people they love in one spot on the memorial instead of having it scattered all over because of age or alphabetical order.” 

“What do you think, Joel?” Tommy asked, making him fold his arms over his chest and sigh. He didn’t give a shit. But that wasn’t the most amicale thing to say when someone was trying to do an objectively good deed. Unlike the other people in this town, he didn’t deserve to add the names of his people to a memorial. He failed in protecting them. He didn’t deserve to mourn like he wasn’t the reason they went into early graves. 

“Yeah, ‘s good. I agree.” He said, finding no faults with your proposal to order the names of the deceased by the order in which people gave it to ‘em. He didn’t know why he was being asked all this. It wasn’t like he was on the council like them. He was just takin’ measurements when he got dragged into this. 

“How many names do you think we’ll get?” Tommy asked him in yet another attempt to get him involved. 

Taking pity on his brother, he began a rough estimate of the number of names they’d get for the memorial and how much surface area they’d need for carving them in. “Six hundred people in town. Babies don’t have names to give. Kids wouldn’t have too many and if they had any, it would be on their parents’ list too. How many kids in this town?”

It was a fucking nightmare, sitting there at the table with you and doing calculations when all he wanted was to throw you over his shoulder and take you back to his place. Make you pose like you were posing in front of your mirror that day. Like women in those porno magazines he sneaked into his teenage bedroom and jerked off to. The fuck were you even thinking? Door left open, tits out, fingers in your cunt and his fucking name on your lips. 

Did you notice him at your door and decided it would be a fun trick to play on an old man? Or did you always scream his name when you fucked yourself? When was the first time? Did you always come so prettily on your own fingers like you came on his? Being in the dark drove him crazy. But part of him felt that getting the answers would drive him absolutely fucking insane. 

The thought alone was enough to make him feel uncomfortable in his pants. He adjusted himself on his seat and looked away from you, afraid that somehow you’d be able to tell that he was having improper thoughts about you when you were talking about honoring the dead. If thinking about you sexually in a church was bad, he was sure it was worse to think it when you were trying to help people memorialize their dead.

You had an air of innocence about you. The brightness of your eyes and the way you moved your hands about as you planned the details of this memorial and scribbled them out on your little notebook. He’d been attracted to that innocence from the very start. A rare thing to find out in the world. When even babies were born into violence and oppression, innocence was a luxury no one even thought to acquire. 

A virgin, too. 

His cock twitched in his pants. He gulped and looked around to check if anyone had caught his shameless response. Nope. 

He was surprised you were a virgin. For all your innocence, you were also fucking beautiful. There were plenty of guys in town. Ladies too, if you liked that. Anyone would’ve snatched you up quick and made sure to show you a world of pleasure. It didn’t take him long knowing you to give in to temptation. It was fucking impossible that no man had worshipped with his head between your thighs. That no man who saw you in your pretty little dresses bent you over and filled you up with his cock.

You were beautiful. Even more so when you came on his fingers. Made all those pretty little sounds. The way you said his name… Nobody had said it like that in such a long time. Not even Tess. 

It rang in his head whenever he found himself alone at home. Being in possession of your panties didn’t help matters. White cotton. Innocent. Covered in your dried up release. When he left that day, he made sure to suck on his fingers. Moaned like a fucking creep while going down your stairs. Eyes closed, he could still taste you on his tongue. After so many days. A little tangy with a hint of salt from your sweat and all woman. 

It had been embarrassingly long since he felt like a man. He’d been father, brother, smuggler, and father again. But long since he was just man. Never someone desirable. Out there, sex was just for release. Purely biological. The end of the fucking world did not afford good hygiene. You fucked someone because they were the safest option. Not because you were attracted to them.

You, however… You had others in this town. You were here before him. Younger, smarter, with a body that worked perfectly fucking well. You could have anyone but it was his name you were moaning out in the privacy of your room. 

He grunted as your voice crept back into his mind. The ‘Joel, please’, and the ‘Sir’. 

He grabbed on to the railing as his thighs trembled, afraid he would have an embarrassing fall. His breaths grew quicker and his mind void of everything but you. 

On your knees. On your back. On your front so he could fuck you from behind. Your hand around his cock. Your lips stretched out around him as you struggled with his size. Fistful of your hair as you begged for release. Please, Sir. Please, Joel.  The heat of your tight velvety cunt. Tears blurring your wide eyed innocence as he stretched out your rear hole. He wanted to take you everywhere, leave you burning with him. Mark you so deep every man you let in after you would know who fucked you first.

It didn't take long. The mental images of you were far too effective. His last time was too long ago. He was too old to last. Too old to want you. Somehow the reminder only pushed him further along. Sticky white cum coated your panties, mixing your scent with his. The mirror showed him a reflection of himself. Old, gray, crow’s feet by his eyes. He dropped your panties in the hamper, the warmth of his own release on his hand and the shame on his face sobering him up quickly. 

He wanted to teach you sin. But you had taught him more of it already than you would ever know.

⌘

“Cool jacket, dude!” 

“Uh…thanks. I traded for it years ago” you said, digging your thumb nail between the teeth of the zipper. It didn’t fit perfectly, but it worked well on cold nights that weren’t cold enough to warrant a sweater. “Is Joel in? I need to talk to him about a building project.”

“Yeah,” said Ellie before pressing her lips into a thin line. “I mean, he was awake half an hour ago when I left, but he could be in dreamland by now. Cause he’s old.” 

“Ah. Of course,” you said, smiling awkwardly at the girl. Joel’s kind of, sort of daughter. You were closer to her than Joel in age. You rolled the memorial plan tighter and tighter, your hands needing to be occupied with something as your mind reeled at the inappropriateness of your desires.

“I’ll make sure I don’t wake him up,” you said before leaving the girl to return to her group of friends. 

He was old enough to be your father. It should disgust you, scare you. Maybe it would’ve if you’d had an actual father in your life. A point of reference to know how vile a man of that age would have to be to want a girl your age. You tried to force some disgust into your veins, hoping that would help in putting out the fire in you that threatened to consume you whole. But it was hard to convince yourself that this was wrong when he’d made you feel so good. 

Your fingers had become inadequate overnight. If his fingers were so powerful over you… You shuddered to think what he could do for you with his penis. It had to feel better. The organ was made for it, unlike fingers.

You stopped outside his door and knocked without giving it a single thought. If you’d thought about it, you would’ve fled. It had already taken you hours to muster up the courage to make the walk to his house with the draft sketches for the memorial. You wouldn’t let your desperation ruin it. 

He looked surprised to see you, mouth opening and closing as though he’d forgotten how to process language. His dark brown curls and the silver that decorated it sat messily atop his head. Like he’d run his fingers through it. An old t-shirt stretched over his chest and struggled against his arms. A pair of dark sweatpants sat on his hips, the drawstrings hanging in the front. 

“Hey? Uh…what’s wrong?” he asked, bringing a hand up to his face and scratching his beard. Why was that hot? You had to be out of your fucking mind.

You cleared your throat and looked up into his eyes. “Does something have to be wrong?”

“You’ve never come here, so I thought…” 

“I’m here about the memorial plans. I have a few designs I want to run by you,” you said, holding up the rolled up sheets of paper.

“Ah. That. Sure, uh come in,” he said, opening the door and stepping aside to allow you passage. You looked around his house, careful to seem disinterested so he didn’t have more reasons to think you were a stupid little girl pining after him just because he made you come once. 

Shit. He probably already thought that. 

“A virgin. Pretty young things like you ain’t for men like me.”

You swallowed at the reminder as he led you to the dining table and offered you a seat. You looked around while he cleared the table. Plates, tools, some worn out novels. So he was the messy sort. You didn’t know who you would be if you’d had the chance to just be. You didn’t know if you would leave things lying around like that if you’d had a normal start to life. Like Joel. Like the others who were old enough to remember life before the cordyceps.

The place didn’t scream Joel Miller. There were no personal artifacts decorating his living room. No framed art. No books. No throw pillows or even a blanket on the couch. 

You knew what it was like to have nothing in your house. When you were still new to the town and it hadn’t hit you yet that you were allowed to have your own things. Collect stuff and not worry about having too many things to carry with you when you had to run. You didn’t own anything you couldn’t fit into your backpack. And you took that backpack everywhere when you managed to step outside your new house. 

But over time, you’d decorated your house. People you helped out at the clinic often gave you things as a token of their gratitude. Kids drew pictures for you. A lady once gave you the art off her wall that the previous owner had put up. Tommy and Maria gave you a new sweater that she’d knit when she was pregnant. New yarn from new wool from the town’s sheep. The first time you ever got something truly new. 

“No decorations, huh?” 

“What?”

“You don’t have any decorations here,” you pointed out again and licked your lips nervously.

“Uh, yeah. Not really the priority. Have’ta trade wisely. Can’t be gettin’ pictures when ya need bread.” 

“Yeah,” you said, nodding. “But you don't have to trade for it, you know? You could put up something of what’s in the house already. Surely the previous owners left some stuff.” 

“They did. Traded ‘em all for things we need. Fresh fruits, bullets, that kinda shit.” 

“Well, it doesn’t have to be framed art. You could cut up a nice picture from a magazine or something.” 

Joel looked up from the plans, head tilted and an eyebrow raised. Shit! Of course he thought you were talking about your magazines with the naked women. 

“I didn’t mean it like that!” you said, your voice coming out squeaky. Embarrassed, you cleared your throat and looked down at the plans. 

“Let’s discuss the plans,” he said, his voice all gruff and his tone so stern. 

“I-I- uh… May I use your restroom?” you asked, unable to look him in the eye after what you’d said. After how he’d reacted. You really didn’t mean it like that. But you could see why that would be hard to believe when the last time he saw you, you had a box full of those men’s entertainment magazines on your bed and one open in front of you as you touched yourself. 

Touched yourself and moaned his name. 

“Upstairs, second door to the left.” 

You squeaked out a thanks before you bolted out of his dining room and made your way up the stairs. There were two bathrooms. One decorated with band posters and a poster of a girl with weirdly cut black hair sitting on a motorcycle. Had to be Ellie’s. The second door to the left was another bathroom. Joel’s, apparently. There was just one bar of soap, a toothbrush, and a pot of toothpaste. No shampoo bar. You pulled the toilet seat and lid down before taking a seat. 

You let out a groan and planted your face in your hands. Why the hell did you have to go and make it awkward like it wasn’t already that way. After he made you come that day, he’d refused to be anywhere near you. You hoped it was just coincidence, but after over a week it became undeniable that he was avoiding you. 

He probably thought you were going to catch feelings. A girl in one of the romance novels you read fell in love with a guy who took her virginity. And there was the time you overheard this guy talking about not wanting to sleep with a girl because she was a virgin. He was afraid she would catch feelings and get clingy. 

Now here you were in his bathroom because you thought it was wise to make small talk and ended up insinuating he should put up dirty pictures on his wall. You could scream. But you wouldn’t. There was already enough awkwardness with him. 

You could always jump out of the window and run off to your house. Never speak of this again. Pretend nothing happened if Joel tried to talk to you about it. But something told you that he wouldn’t. He would probably be happy if he never had to interact with you again. You had been acting desperate. He caught you touching yourself moaning his name, for fuck’s sake! 

Your hands, permanently dry from all the times you scrubbed them clean for your patients, found some moisture from your salty tears. It was embarrassing, sitting in the bathroom of a guy who wanted nothing to do with you after you scared him off with your stupid little infatuation. 

You were a grown woman. Still young, but too old to be acting like this. You should have some experience already. Not sniffling over a man more than twice your age. He was right. He had been a grown man with experience longer than you’d been alive. Of course he wanted nothing to do with you. 

The window looked more and more attractive as the seconds passed. It had been a while since you did something like that. You didn’t need to jump out of buildings or trees anymore. You didn’t go on patrols like some residents. With no need to fight for your life and having all the food you could need to never go hungry even once, you’d become a little unfit. If you broke a bone jumping out of Joel’s bathroom window, there would be questions. And everyone would know. You’d have to avoid the whole town instead of just Joel. 

You’d just have to face it. Even if facing it was doing as little as just bidding him goodbye and bolting out of his house without an explanation. You got off his toilet and pressed the flush just so he didn’t think you were weird. Like it fucking mattered. He already found you weird and desperate. 

You washed your hands, letting the water wash away the tears on your hands before wiping your wet hands over your face in an attempt to remove traces of your crying. 

You should’ve just left after that. Not looked around. Not snooped like a creep. You didn’t ever dig. You didn’t have to look too deep to catch it. But a sliver of white peeked out through the netted walls of the laundry hamper. A sliver of white cotton with a light blue stitch. 

Without second thought, you dug into his dirty laundry. You came up with the white cotton fabric, going straight to the gusset where the blue thread stitched the fabric pieces together. The original stitch had given out and you sewed it back together just some time back. The blue thread was all that you had at the time. 

As though the sight of your panties in Joel’s bathroom wasn’t jarring enough, next came the smell. Of you. Your cum. You felt practically hear your own heartbeats as you recalled how he’d cleaned you up with your own panties. You recalled that he stuffed the fabric in his pocket as you lied on your bed, pussy still pulsating from his handiwork, brain melted, and life changed forever. 

You took another whiff of your panties, goosebumps raising the hairs on your body as you felt it. Your cum and something else. It was still damp.

Blood rushed back up to your face and you felt yourself getting tense. 

This fucker. How dare he? You’d been embarrassed just a minute ago over your desires and he was doing this the whole time? Noticing you on the streets and running away for days. Running back to his home where he kept your fucking panties, apparently. Avoiding you for so long only to cum in your panties. 

So he wanted you. 

If not you, he at least wanted sex. Dirrty old man who liked attention from you, but you weren’t even disgusted. Just angry he was pretending to be better than that. He could’ve used any old rag, but he used your panties. 

You brought your defiled panties back up and smelled them again. Strangely, it smelled something like bleach. Or you could be wrong. You’d never… You didn’t know what a man’s release was supposed to smell like. Was it different for each man or did they all smell the same? 

Wetness pooled in your panties as you imagined him touching himself. Large rough hand wrapped around himself. Did he think of you when he did it? Think of you naked in your bedroom and taking his fingers? What did his penis look like? What would it feel like? Soft? Rough? You’d wondered about having one inside you, but never about a particular man’s anatomy. But this was Joel. Joel was the only one who’d gotten this far in your head. 

He couldn’t deny it to you anymore. If nothing else, you could at least call him out for ignoring you when he was wiping his ejaculate off with your stolen panties.

“Joel!” you called out before your fears could talk you out of confronting him. Unsure if he would’ve heard you, you opened the bathroom door and yelled his name out again. “Joel!” 

“What?” 

“Come up here!” 

“What happened?” 

“Just come here.” 

You heard him sigh, the sound followed by the typical grunts and groans he made when standing up. Fuckin’ old man, ruining your life. Ruining your self-confidence. Ruining your fucking panties. His heavy footsteps thudded against the stairs as he climbed up, the sound getting louder as he got closer to the bathroom. 

“Why were you screaming my name like y–” he stopped mid scold, frozen in place by the door as he saw what you had in your hand. He opened and closed his mouth, as though attempting to explain but deciding otherwise. He licked his lips and scratched the back of his neck, his eyes looking everywhere but at you. 

“Do you not have rags, Joel?” you taunted, taking a step towards him and enjoying seeing him step back. You felt powerful, moving a large man with just your voice. It was very unlike how he made you feel all the days he ignored you. Weak, insignificant, undesirable.

“You weren’t meant to– Fuck, I’m sorry!” 

“Which part are you apologizing for? For breaking into my house and touching me? For ignoring me ever since? For stealing my underwear? Or for doing whatever you did with it?”

You moved him out of the bathroom, making him walk backwards in the hallway you hoped led to his bedroom. Even if it didn’t, you’d be fine. You’d exact revenge in any place you can. As long as you got to make him feel the way he made you feel. Pleasure. Shame. Want. 

“I’m sorry. Fuck, I’m so sorry. I never should’ve—”

You took your last step towards him, finally trapping him against a wall. You stood close enough to place your hand on his chest. You licked your lips, the rock hard muscles beneath your touch storing itself away in your mind for later use. 

“Imagine what would happen if I told someone? You sister-in-law, perhaps… She hates you, doesn’t she?” You smirked, though you were screaming on the inside. You didn’t know where you got all this courage from. You didn’t know you had it in you to threaten a man as imposing as Joel. 

He turned pale, his hands up against the wall in surrender. If you’d asked him, he wouldn’t tell you the truth that it was to keep himself from touching you. “Please don’t tell anyone. I won’t do this again, I swear.” 

“Maybe I want you to do this again…” 

“You don’t. Trust me.” 

“Shh!” You said, placing your index finger on his lips. Pink, perfectly shaped, and so damn kissable. “Don’t tell me what I want. You ignored me ever since you walked into my house without my permission and shoved your fingers inside me. I was walking around town believing I wasn’t good enough for big old Joel Miller. What did you say? That you’ve been experiencing longer than I’ve been alive?” 

You raised an eyebrow at him when he didn’t answer. Then he nodded reluctantly.

“Why were you coming in my panties then if I didn't measure up? ” 

“I won’t do it ag—” he groaned when you grabbed his cock through his pants. He let out a low grunt and his Adam’s Apple bobbed in his neck as he swallowed. You replaced your index finger with your thumb, tracing his trembling lips as you lazily stroked his cock with your other thumb. 

He filled your whole hand and there was still more. It took everything in you to not moan at the sheer size of him. To not grind your belly against it to feel it against you. You didn’t know how big it was supposed to be, but the romance novels you read always described the big ones as more desirable. 

“I don’t want to hear excuses. I asked why. Why did you steal my panties, Joel Miller?” 

“I don’t know.” 

“Did you come on it? Don’t fucking lie to me cause I can fucking smell you on it.” 

“I did. I jerked off with it.” You had to choke back a moan at that. No, you had to be strong. Show him you could take the upper hand just like he did with you. You weren’t a little girl with a crush. You were a woman and you could have this effect on a grown man. You refused to be discounted with a pat on your pussy no matter how much you wanted him to touch you like that again. 

“Mmm. And that’s enough to get you going. Just a pair of my panties.” 

“Mhmm.” 

“Show me how you did it.” 

“What?” He asked, eyebrow raised. 

“Show. Me. How you did it.” 

He narrowed his eyes at you, his hand coming up to stroke the base of his neck. “Wh-What?”

You felt your heart thud against your ribs and if you didn’t know from experience and your textbooks, you’d have been afraid that he could hear it. You’d never done anything so daring. You were the timid girl when it came to this stuff. That the thought even occurred to you was a testament to how much you desired Joel. Not just to sleep with any guy, but to have Joel. Without a word, you reached under the skirt of your dress and tugged your panties down. 

He inhaled sharply as you bent down and came back up with your panties. Undyed white fabric, a little green ribbon in the shape of a bow stitched to the front, gusset a light gray from your wetness. 

“Show me. I want to see what you were doing in your bathroom with my panties after ignoring me everyday,” you said, taking his hand and forcing the fabric into it. His hand curled around it and you found yourself feeling lighter. You didn't know how long you could keep up the brave front if he continued to have no response. 

“Take your clothes off.” 

It was like something changed the moment you gave him the garment. His eyes were on you, his gaze unrelenting. He took a step ahead and you stepped backward. His lips curled up in a smirk. It seemed playtime was over… Like a lion letting the cubs play at predation before taking over to show how hunting was really done. 

You didn’t know if you were ready for that… Sure it was nothing he’d never seen before, but it was different. The last time, you didn’t do it with the intention to have him see you. He just happened to see you bare and you didn’t cover up when you realized. 

“I don’t have a box full of dirty magazines. I need to see somethin’,” he said, his eyes going down your frame like they had every right to be there. “Or you could leave these,” he said, holding your panties up in front of your eyes, “and run back home. What d’ya say?”

You swallowed, your hands shaking as you reached behind to find the zipper of your dress. You weren’t going to run off. Not when you’d been desperate for so long to do something, anything with him. Cold air kissed your back as you pulled the zipper down and the hairs on your body stood up in full attention. You pushed the sleeves off your shoulder and shimmied out of the dress, standing in just your dress in front of him. 

He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the wall. He looked you up and down. He tilted his head as he looked you up and down. He radiated superiority, putting you in some kind of a daze. “Your bra too. Show me your tits.” 

The crudeness had more wetness pooling between your legs. You nodded wordlessly, afraid that pathetic whimpers would be the only sound you’d make under his gaze. You reached behind and felt around for the clasp of your bra. With his eyes piercing into you, you failed to find it quickly like you usually did. Your mouth dried up, your tongue sticking to the roof. 

He made no effort to help. A mocking smile assumed its place on his lips as he watched you struggle in front of him. 

When you finally managed your task and stood fully naked, he stood up straight. His tongue darted out and licked his lips. You felt like a piece of meat placed in front of a starving man. Just seconds ago, you were telling yourself you didn’t need his approval, that this would just be revenge. But as he evaluated your body, your pussy wept with the need for your body to be nothing but what he liked.

“Room’s that way.” He nodded in the direction of the room. You turned around and took small steps, your shoulders curling inward and your head bowed in submission. Every inch of your skin burned with the strength of his gaze. 

“Kneel.” 

You placed your knee on his bed, ready to climb up. 

“On the floor.” 

One knee still on his white sheets, you turned around to look at him. He was so large. Imposing. The kind of figure you would follow without question. So, you did. 

“You look pretty on your knees.” 

He took a few steps towards you, stopping when the distance had your neck straightening to look up at him. Large, powerful, imposing. Another step and you were face-to-face with his crotch. His bulge was right there. 

“Go on, take it out. Since you wanted it so bad.” 

Joel didn’t think you would do it. You looked even smaller kneeling at his feet. Meek little thing. He didn’t at all expect you to taunt him the way you did. Especially after you threatened to tell on him to Maria. He fully expected you to start crying. Guess he really underestimated you. Virgin didn’t necessarily mean innocent. 

Yet you folded as soon as he took the reins. He saw the change in you right when he told you to take your clothes off. When your eyes went from determined to defeated. All that spunk evaporated to reveal the little girl underneath. He liked it like that. Made him feel like a real man. Not that there was any scarcity of masculinity in his life of taking out clickers and defending this town. But somethin’ about a beautiful woman accepting his authority did the trick faster than every other display of masculinity. 

Your hands fiddled with his belt, trembling as you tried to take it off. He stopped you with a hand on your wrist. “Just undo the zip.” 

No way he was going to get naked in front of a pretty little twenty something. It wasn’t anything great to look at even before he began a life of violence and traversing the wilderness. Sure he was well built from all the hard physical labor and constant fight for survival. It’d left several unappealing scars on his person. Time had done a number on him too. Especially his pudgy belly. It didn’t help that food flowed free in Jackson, fattening him up a little. 

Thankfully, you listened. You looked up, as though you expected him to complete the task for him. He challenged you with a look. Wanna be a big girl so bad, act like one.

You reached inside his pants and took his cock out. Your lips parted and he heard you inhale through your mouth. His cock hung in front of him, hard from your teasing. He had to give it to you, you were daring for a meek little thing. No one in town would believe him if he told them all that you’d done. And he suspected he didn’t even know the half of it.

“Not too late to back out, you know?” he said, wrapping his hand around himself. It took everything in him to give you an out. As much as he wanted to grab your face, force your mouth open and make you gag around him, he was man enough to let you know you didn’t have to do anything. Young girl probably bit more than you could swallow. And seeing his cock and your mouth so close by showed that he was definitely nothing you could swallow.

“I’m not backing out.” 

“First time seeing one?” 

“Of course not. I work at the clinic. You think I haven’t seen a penis?” 

“No anatomical terms. I ain’t your patient. Go on, touch my cock.” 

You reached up for him, but he stepped back, delighting himself in the disappointment on your face. “Come on, you want a man so bad, work for it.” 

You moved to stand up. “Did I say you could stand up?” 

“No.” 

“Then get back on your fucking knees.” 

You dropped to your knees and he groaned in satisfaction. The euphoria of wielding power over someone rushed through his veins. And he wanted more. It was the same sick satisfaction he got when he beat men to death. When he broke bones and dressed animals he hunted in the wild. “Good girl. You’re going to listen to what I say. Got it?” 

“Yes, Sir.” 

Fuck! That fucking word again.

“Come on, come get it. Hands and knees. Crawl to me.” 

He beckoned you forward with one hand, his other still on his cock. You bent over and god fucking damnit, you were a vision. You were an eager girl and he could see what you could become in the right hands. His hands. The things he could show you… Introduce you to your own body. Bring you pain and pleasure that were indistinguishable.

Your tits hung from your chest, swaying as you crawled towards him. Feverish, bright eyes followed him as he continued to refuse what you wanted. Too fucking late. He warned you. Told you men like him weren’t for pretty little things like you. But you didn’t fucking want to listen. Now you’d have to deal with the consequences. Maybe you’d stay away then. 

“Please, Sir,” you whined so prettily he almost gave in. 

“What are you begging for?” 

“You. Y-your penis.” 

“My cock,” he corrected. “Say it.”

“Your cock, Sir.” 

“Good girl. C’mere,” he said, giving you a nod to come closer. You crawled to him and when he didn’t back away, sat up on your knees. He placed his hand on the back of your neck and gripped your hair, making you hiss. Holding you in place, he brought his cock to your face. You looked up at it, your eyes widening and your mouth slackening. You brought your hand up and touched his tip with just your thumb. The rest of your hand followed, wrapping around him. He gasped silently as you stroked his slit with your thumb, making him leak precum on you. 

“Did…? Did you?” 

“No. Gotta do more ‘n that to make me come. That’s precum.” 

“Oh.” 

He didn’t think you knew what precum was. Probably not the focus of your education here. Not the most important thing when townsfolk came in injured after patrols or suffering from a fever that was life threatening without the medicines of the past. 

He pressed his cock against your cheek. The sight presented a visual of how you’d struggle if you took him in your mouth. He’d have you choking on him before you even took half. He twitched against your face at the mere thought. You were the picture of innocence, even with his cock on your face. Even with the stunt you pulled before he put you back in your place. 

“Think I’ll just do this. Fuck your pretty face.” 

You whimpered, spurring him on. He wanted to force himself inside you, punish your mouth for having the gall to speak to him the way you did. Make you cry from how full of him you were. Give you a sore throat so when you spoke to him again, you’d remember to speak with respect. But you wouldn’t be able to handle it. So he’d settle for defiling your sweet features, hold his cock against your cheek and rut like the animal he was.

“I ain’t gonna lay you out on my bed and take you nice and slow. I’m just gonna use you. ‘s what men like me do.”

He pulled away, giving you another opportunity to rethink this. “You can put your fucking clothes on and leave if you don’t like it.” 

To his surprise, you stayed put on your knees. You shook your head before reaching up and rubbing your cheek against his cock. You let out a soft moan, eyes closed and your thighs pressed together tight. “No, no. I like it.” 

“Fuckin’ slut,” he said, his hand back in your hair. He tugged at it and took his cock in his other hand. He tapped your lips with his tip, smearing the precum that leaked out of him. “You like an older man using your face like it’s a pussy?” 

“Yes, Sir.” 

He snorted, amused. “Never met a virgin slut before. Getting your face fucked before your pussy. Bet you’re wet from this.” 

There was the sweet little whimper from you again. He wanted to hear more of it. Trap you underneath him and make you weep and cry and whimper as he split you in half.

“Let me see. Touch your pussy, show me your slick.” 

You obeyed, spread your knees and touched yourself. Your hand glistened under the light of his bedroom, your wetness stretching between your fingers in strings. “Goddamn, would you look at that…” he said in a low rumble. “Rub it on my cock.” 

Your hand trembled slightly and you stared at him with a blank look in your eyes. He guided your hand to his cock, withdrawing his hand when he’d brought you close enough so you could decide whether you wanted to follow his command. You touched your slickened hand to his cock, covering him in the evidence that you wanted this. Wanted him. You reached between your legs and brought more of yourself, eyes soft yet glazed with lust as you smeared yourself all over his length. 

“Ask me for it.” 

“Please,” you whined. 

“Please, what?” 

“P-please fuck my face. Sir.” 

He returned his cock to your cheek, your wetness lubricating your face. Hand cradling his cock, he began to thrust. It wasnt much different from fucking his own fist. It was just skin. Not the tight velvety wetness of a pussy or a throat that would gag with his thickness. But your face was softer than his gun callused hands. Even better was your pretty face, looking up at him so adoringly… So full of desire. 

He didn’t have to let his imagination do the trick now. Not when you were right in front of him, lending yourself for his use. And no imagination, no memory did justice to you. Your body. Scarred, but beautiful. Tits that filled his large hands, clean and styled hair, a belly that showed you were well fed. He wanted to lay you out on his bed and consume you. Take your tits in his mouth, grab handfuls of your ass, spread your cunt lips and lodge himself inside you. Give it to you hard so your thigh jiggled and you felt them ache as they rubbed against each other when you walked around in your pretty little dresses. 

But as depraved as he was, he knew he shouldn’t be the first to take you. He’d have you just this once. Store your image in his head to get off with for as long as his dick worked. You acted all brave, but he couldn’t shake off that you were still inexperienced. The first time was meant to be good. The world was no longer normal, but you could have normality within the insular walls of Jackson. 

Even this was wrong. Using you like this instead of making sweet love to you. But he hadn’t been that man in a long time. He was selfish and cruel. If there was no town, no community where everyone knew everyone and you still threw yourself at him, he would’ve taken you in all your holes with no hesitation. Ruined you, kept you until your body wasn’t of use and tossed you aside. But being in this semi-normal place had gotten its claws into him. Softened him up.

He grew closer to the edge embarrassingly quickly, the haze of carnal pleasure beginning to muffle the voices screaming in his head to let you go. He only barely noticed that you were touching yourself. Enjoying this treatment of you. That spurred him on. There was no stopping now. 

You let out soft moans, your eyes never once leaving him. He struggled to get himself to focus. To check for any signs you didn’t want this. But all he saw was you on the precipice of pleasure. The world disappeared. His house, Jackson, the darkness that lay beyond. It was all him now. He felt lighter, like he would float out through the window and everything he’d ever been through would disappear. Every ounce of goodness quietened down, the last shreds of his morality discarded with your dress. He grunted and moaned your name as he kept fucking you. Your features morphed into nothingness. No longer a face, no longer a human woman. All he knew was the ache in his body, the tightness that begged to be released. 

He slapped a hand against the wall as his thighs stiffened and every muscle in the vicinity of his cock tightened. He took himself back in his hand and stroked himself over your face. Once, twice, and thr– mid stroke, he growled and spilled on your face, coating your innocent features in sticky white cum. You flinched as the first stream hit, screwing your eyes shut. He wanted to make you look, see how he could defile you, show you that he wasn’t for you. Force you to confront what you’d allowed into your life so you’d run and never look back. 

But all he could do was keep stroking as he came down from his high. It was unlike anything he’d had in the recent past. Not his imagination, not just his hand. A real human woman who wasn’t just a convenience. One who sought him out, stripped for him, and let him use her face like a toy. 

He took a minute to collect his breath and let his senses return to him. His cock hung semi-hard outta his jeans, like it could go again if he willed it. Like it wasn’t almost six decades old. But he wasn’t too surprised. He could go again for the utterly debauched girl in front of him. Innocence eclipsed by milky white ropes of his cum. Without thinking twice, he grabbed your hair and pulled at it. You yelped, but let him pull you up from the ground and drag you to the other side of the room. 

He stopped you in front of his mirror, and slapped your hand off your pussy before replacing it with his. “Look at yourself. I fucking told you,” he said, forcing two thick fingers inside your cunt. You sucked him in with little resistance, your cunt leaking enough for him to force a third finger inside you. You gasped and tried to wriggle away, but he wasn’t having it. He was a fucking monster, but he would never leave a woman unsatisfied. Especially a young thing who’d never had anyone else before. 

He wrapped his free hand around your throat, his half hard cock begging him to go again when he felt the vibrations of your moans. “I warned you,” he whispered into your ear. “Fuckin’ warned you. Told you how starved I was. And you still taunted me. Look at you now!” 

“Please… Please, Joel! Sir, please…” 

“Fuckin’ slut. Maybe you ain’t really a virgin.” 

“I am, I am, I promise. I wa–” you cut yourself off with a gasp as he pressed his thumb on your clit. 

“What was that?” 

You made some incoherent noises, too far gone to form words. Yet you managed to thrust onto his fingers and roll your hips like a real natural. 

“Joel…” 

“I know, pretty girl… I know,” he cooed, the softness in his voice contradicting how he’d used you just minutes prior. Contradicting the cum on your pretty little face. 

“You gonna come for me? Give me another one after you came so sweetly on my fingers that day?” 

There were no answers from you. Not even an acknowledgement that you heard him. Just whines and moans as you let him support your entire weight. Your head lolled back on his shoulder and your eyes rolled back into your skull as he fucked you stupid with just his fingers. Oh the things he could do with his cock… Reach deeper, take the virginity you’d held on to for so long. If he ever had you, he would never let go. He was too selfish a man to willingly lose a girl so precious after taking her cunt. 

You gripped him like a vice, so tight he couldn't pry his fingers out. Something that vaguely sounded like his name spilled from your lips as you crumpled in his arms. Your pussy pulsated around you as he held you against him, unwilling to remove himself from you so quickly. 

He withdrew your panties from his pocket– the fresh pair you took off in his fucking hallways like it was no big deal. He wiped your face with it the same way he cleaned up your cunt that day. Instead of tucking it in his pocket, he forced it into your hand. 

“Put it on. Your fucking dress, too. Hope you learned you fucking lesson.”

As you put it on and scampered away naked into his hallways, he hoped it would be enough to scare you away. But he knew in his heart of hearts that he would always crave you like an addict craving a drink.

⌘

Fic update notifications over at @chocofountain-notifs

[bigfatbimbo]

Vox x Reader SMUT where reader has some animalistic features and tendencies which meaaaaannnsss… it just happens to be a time where she’s in heat and riding Vox while he’s begging to have a break bc it’s been going on for several days at that point and poor baby just needs to recharge 🥺

Sorry if it’s too much 😭 head canons, oneshot, both idk but thank you for the Hazbin Hotel content regardless!

a/n — Wow this really reminds me of my old (cringey) hazbin hotel character who was like part lion? i haven’t seen her in years but i did lowkey ship her with vox so this was kinda funny of a request receive!

Also i’m not quite sure how to write a character ‘in heat’ and I did this in a rush. However, I do wanna post it tonight so… edits will be made tomorrow

Help, i’m rambling here’s the fic, even though it’s short.

“P—zzz—lease wait!” Vox pleaded from beneath you. “Fuck—bzz— please stop just wait—“

You didn’t even acknowledge his pleas as you milked his cock for all it was worth. You didn’t process what he was even asking, just that he had something you wanted. 

“Oh—nngh— oh god,” Vox moaned and buffered. You had been riding him like this for what felt like days, not even letting up once after he came.

It was insanely hot but incredibly tiring. Vox felt like if you kept going like this for much longer, he would blue screen. 

Unfortunately for him, you didn’t look like you were slowing anytime soon.

“Mm, so much—bzzz— it’s too much,” Vox whined loudly. He felt like he was loosing the ability to breathe, even though he wasn’t. 

The only responses you had been letting out were animalistic growls and yet, he still looked a thousand times more wrecked than you.

He could barely think, his brain fuzzy with your relentless attention. Every now and then a spurt of electricity would shoot from his dick and he’d be sure the shock would slow you down. 

Alas, it only made you ride him harder. He sobbed pathetically on the bed, exhausted and ready for a break, but both you and his dick disagreed.

“Please— tsk tsk— please stop,” He pleaded, earning a half audible growl from the back of your throat. 

“Slo—ooo—ow down—“ He cried, buffering and moaning. He felt his dick twitch at your indifference. 

He sniffled loudly, as if he even had been crying for a long time, and then, with nothing left to do, whimpered pathetically.

Finally, your growls and snarls built up into a final, almost dry orgasm on his cock.

With that, you went still, breathing heavily, pupils shrinking back to their normal size. You looked as if you were snapping out of a trance.

When you slid off his dick he whined at the emptiness. You leaned over and kissed his screen lovingly.

“C’mon, let’s get you cleaned up.”

a/n — i’m not very proud of this tbh, it’s not proofread but I hope you guys like it!

[seospicybin]

TOO HOT TO HANDLE.

PART III

Hyunjin x reader. (s)

Too Hot To Handle Masterlist

Synopsis: You and Hyunjin become contestants in a reality dating show, Too Hot To Handle. (14k words)

Author's note: Feel free to vent in my inbox once you finished reading it :)

LANA: In order to test how committed my guests are to the process, I call for help from my former retreat guests: Felix, Chris, and Avery. Their mission is to entice them to find out if they're capable of following the rules outside the retreat.

-

Everyone is going around exchanging hugs and cheek kisses while telling each other's names.

You only remember it now, the name of the girl, it's Avery and she looks like a Malibu Barbie with an Australian accent.

When it's your turn to hug Chris, you have to actively tell your brain to stay calm and not think about how you have a secret crush on him.

"Chris," he introduces himself, opening his arm for a friendly hug.

It's a good thing that he's not shirtless or else, you'd be drooling by now but those big biceps are quite distracting.

"Hi, Chris," you manage to sound coy saying it.

You catch a whiff of his perfume as you exchange a hug and Gosh, he smells amazing. You're staggering as you walk backward to be with everyone else.

"The three of you are Australians," Edie innocently says.

"We' are Australia's sexiest export since... ever," Felix jokingly says then breaks into laughter.

Even his laugh is so attractive, It's sonorous and infectious, inviting you to laugh along with him.

"We came back because we learned so much on the previous seasons that we came to pass the lesson on to you," Avery says, then she glances at the guys standing on each side of her, "Right, guys?"

Felix puts his hand against his waist and puts all of his weight to one side like he's striking a pose in a photo shoot.

"Well, yeah," he says with his nose scrunched, "but also we came here to show you guys how to have fun!"

Chris pops open the bottle of champagne on cue, sending the content spurting out of it and he hurriedly takes a chug to stop it from spilling.

It's unfair how Chris can easily make you feel the slightest bit hot and bothered, just standing there with that wine dripping down his chin. You lick your lips while imagining licking the wine on his veiny neck.

Realizing that you're in the presence of other people, you hurriedly snap yourself out of it.

"Wait, wait, it's not fair that there's three of us and five of them," Avery says while adorably crossing her arms in front of her.

Felix puts his arm around her and brightly smiles, "Don't worry, we'll make it even," he says.

Your head starts looking around the boat, anticipating something and perhaps, anyone's arrival based on what Felix said.

"Give a warm welcome to the two new arrivals!" Avery cheerily announces.

With Lana, it can't be just a boat party, you can tell that she threw this party for certain purposes other than to introduce the new arrivals.

It's wise that you keep cautious with whatever you're doing at this party. You don't want to mess with either Lana or the money, and you surely don't want to mess it up with Hyunjin.

The new arrivals are looking hot and heavy, ready to fuck everybody. The girl is a gorgeous blonde with big, blue eyes named Emile and the guy is a Brazilian man with a chest tattoo, Gustav.

With Chris tirelessly filling the glass and Felix distributing it to everyone, they make sure everyone holds a drink in their hands and is ready for a toast.

"Cheers!" Everyone says in unison, raising their champagne flutes in the air before taking a sip of it.

Things get crazy whenever alcohol is involved so to be safe, you moderately drink your wine and sip as little as possible.

"Okay now we each choose someone to do a body shot with," Felix suggests an icebreaker to fully kickstart the party.

Avery is the one who enthusiastically welcomed that idea and she starts looking for someone to do it with. The boys must be buzzing and whoever gets chosen, he's lucky as hell.

"You," Avery says, pointing in your direction.

You look to the side at Edouard and elbow his side to make him aware of this one-of-a-kind offer.

"No. You," Avery says, talking to you.

Aghast, you unconsciously point at yourself and ask her back to confirm, "Me?"

Avery laughs at the way you reacted, "Come here, my darling," she puts away her drink, then holds her hand out at you.

Half disoriented, you reach for her hand and she makes you sit on the wooden floor with colorful cushions strewn around for people to lay about.

"Now, lay down," she instructs you.

Somehow, you find yourself obeying her words and putting yourself in a compromising position. You rest your head on your pillow and try to stay calm even though everyone is looking at you.

Avery grabs a glass of shot in her hand and she puts all of her hair away on one shoulder, she smiles as she lifts the shot before dripping it onto your chest.

"Oh, my gosh!" You shakily gasp the second the liquid makes contact with your skin, making you shiver from the cold.

But that's the least of the things you should be surprised by. Avery then leans down while keeping her hair down on her shoulder and drinks the puddle of alcohol gathered on the valley of your breasts.

Avery lands a long lick down your front, her tongue feels slick and hot on your skin, making you grip the cushion and try so hard not to squeal.

She seems to enjoy doing it and everyone else can only watch it with envy in their eyes. The laugh she lets out as she lifts her head confirms it.

"Now that's how you start a party!" Edouard says.

Without having to look, you know you're flustered and your hands fly to cover your face, embarrassed. Also, you must admit it gets you a little aroused as well and the party has only started.

-

YOU: In the middle of the sea, on a boat with these sexy, horny people and plenty of booze... [exhales] That's the recipe for chaos.

-

Hyunjin's head is all over the place. He can't stay still and when he finally does, all sorts of thoughts go through his head and they're all not helping him relax.

And he can't help but wonder is this how you felt when he was going on that date with Saskia?

He'll take it as his karma then but he's not the only one feeling restless, the others who are in couples are going through the same things but have different ways of handling it.

Andy, however, is not taking it well. He's going through five stages of grief around the villa.

"When I went on that date with Edie she made it clear that she only wanted to be friends and that she wanted to connect with someone else," Andy croons while tugging his blond hair.

Hyunjin nods to let him know that he's listening to his rant but has nothing to respond to that.

"I think it'll be good for her to connect with someone else," he says with a nonchalant shrug.

That would be nice of him to think so because Hyunjin could never think that way, he wants you to be happy but God, he'd hate to lose you to someone else.

Andy plops onto the lounger next to him and roughly runs his hands through his hair.

"I've already detached myself from her and I feel bad for still wanting to be with her," he grumbles.

"We've all been there," Hyunjin says, trying to sympathize with him.

Hyunjin almost forgot about that part where Andy broke up with Edie. Even though they're no longer a couple now, you can just detach yourself from people but the feelings, they're pretty much still intact.

It's even harder in the villa because the person is there and you have to deal with it face to face.

God, Hyunjin hopes he doesn't need to go through that much pain.

-

HYUNJIN: [Breathing deeply]

-

The boat party is in full swing.

Felix is making sure everyone's glass is filled, Avery is floating around with her wide, bright smile and Chris is playing some party music on his small DJ set-up.

So far so good, no one has broken the rules yet but 'yet' is the keyword here, you get the feeling that it's only about time until someone caves in, and when that happens, it will trigger a chain reaction.

You decide to sit this one out and watch the party from the side, avoiding any potential risk that would lead you to break the rules.

You're quietly sipping your wine while sitting against the big cushion and enjoying the nice, warm sea breeze when the temptation comes over to you carrying a bottle of champagne.

It's hard not to smile whenever he's around and he's smiling at you.

"Do you mind if I join you?" Chris asks.

"Not at all," you reply, scooting a little to the side to make space for him.

"Let me refill it for you," he says, offering to fill your glass with more wine.

In return, you take the bottle from him and fill his glass for him, having a toast to finally have a sip together. He's sitting so close to you, that you can feel your arms brushing together from the slightest of movement.

He looks out at the view of the sun that is slowly sinking into the horizon and delightfully sighs. Then he turns his head at you and asks you something that you're not ready to answer.

"Would you kiss anyone here?"

Well, there is someone you would like to kiss but he's off-limits.

"Oh, I would love to but uh..." you break into a laugh as your eyes meet his.

Chris licks his lips after sipping his wine, "Are you worried about the rules?"

Not the main reason why but yeah, that's one of the reasons. You chuckle and answer, "I've spent a lot of money already."

He cracks a laugh and his dimples appear on his cheeks, "Been there, done that."

As someone who went through this before, you're sure he knows how it felt because there's no other reason why he laughed.

"So, tell me about this guy you've spent a lot of money with," he asks.

You contemplate for a moment how much can you tell but since he's someone from outside of this retreat and went through the same thing, maybe he can give you some insights.

"Well, he kind of messed up a while ago actually," you share with him.

"Ouch!" He exclaims.

"But I found myself still liking him despite all of that," you continue, sipping your wine in between sentences, "It's actually scared me because I think I've lost my head a little."

It's been gnawing inside you, how you doubt Hyunjin will be the right one for you as you get haunted by this fear that he'll make the same mistake again.

Chris holds his drink in the other hand and slightly turns his body to face you, "Maybe losing your head means you're maybe in your heart," he warmly tells you.

You smile hearing his words and you really wish they're true, you're having this doubt because you want this to be something genuine.

"That's what I hope," he adds with a smile.

"Thank you, Chris," you sincerely tell him, clinking your glass with him for another toast.

When you said it's only about time, well, the time is here. As you look around for another bottle of wine, you see Edie and the new guy going at each other's faces like animals in heat.

But that's the least of your worries. When you turn your head the other way, you see Edouard doing body shots on Saskia.

It's not only about the money now, but also loyalty and friendships. You drain your wine glass empty and gasp, "We're fucked!"

-

YOU: They forgot everything! They forgot about the purpose, forgot about Lana, forgot about everyone.

-

Hyunjin can hardly think of anything when you haven't returned on dinnertime. He barely eats his food, he tries shoving a few spoonfuls but has a hard time swallowing them down.

"I'm not hungry," he says, pushing the plate away from him.

"Your plate is still full," Frida says, her voice tinted with concern.

He reclines in his seat and sighs, "I'm too tense."

"I know how you feel," Vic says as she's also waiting for Edouard to return.

Andy pats his shoulder and with a mouth full of food says, "At least you're not worrying someone who doesn't want to be with you."

Well, that's a way to look at the brighter side of things.

The longer you're away from him, the more he worries and his worries affect other people in the vicinity as well. However, there's one person in particular who is having fun in this situation.

"If Edouard kissed someone, would you be pissed?" Diego asks Vic who's sitting cross-legged on the single sofa on the terrace.

"Depends on who he did it with," she answers while picking at her nails.

"If he kissed Saskia, would you be pissed?"

"Very," she answers without a beat.

That gets Hyunjin more alerted, because what if you kissed someone? You know, like out of curiosity? Speaking of experience, he almost did it once with Saskia.

"Do you think they might do something?" Hyunjin nervously asks.

"What do you think?" Diego tosses the question at Vic.

"If I know him like I think I do, I think he won't kiss anyone," she diplomatically answers.

Hyunjin doesn't know how she's doing it but he must admire Vic's patience and calmness in handling this.

"They won't do anything," Andy says, perhaps still stuck in the denial phase.

"If I were with someone here and I went there, and people started kissing each other, I'd probably do it," Diego is here to fuel more gas into the fire.

Frida grabs him by the knee and makes him listen to her, "It is something that I won't do to you because not only it would affect us, but also my friendship with her."

That seems to work on putting some sense into Diego and makes him stop talking altogether.

Hyunjin always thinks highly of you, he knows you wouldn't throw away what the two of you have built together, and that gets him a little hopeful.

"I bet my ass they're doing stuff," Vic remarks out of the blue.

Hyunjin doesn't expect this change of mood, she seems to have reached her limit and can't keep her composure anymore.

Andy sighs and leans back on the sofa, playing with the cushion on his lap, twirling it in the air a couple of times.

"There's a lot at stake today. Relationships, friendships, the house, the money..." he pauses to turn his head to the side to look at Vic, "...Vic's ass."

Everyone laughs at that and it helps to lighten up the mood, the only one who doesn't take it well is Vic.

"Fuck you!" She curses while laughing, hurling a cushion at Andy.

-

HYUNJIN: I hope for the best. But I also expect for the worst [blows air]

-

"Okay, honestly, but there is one person I'd like to kiss here," you suddenly share.

That gets Chris' eyebrow raised in curiosity, "Yeah. Who is it?"

You look him right in the eyes and answer, "I'm looking right at him."

He closes his eyes and grins, from the way his ear reddening you can tell he gets shy from what you said which is why you said that in the first place. That, and because of alcohol.

"But I know you're engaged and all," you quickly add.

He grins wider, and he looks so cute and shy like that, if he weren't off-limits, your head would definitely take a hard turn.

"I may be bad but I'm not that bad," you further explain, giggling along with him.

"So, not because of the guy you broke rules with?"

That catches you off guard and you laugh in embarrassment, "Well, yeah, that too."

"In that order?" He asks again, bumping his shoulder against you.

"Exactly in that order. You then him," you jokingly say.

This time, his cheeks get all red and his dimples sunken deeper into his cheeks as he keeps grinning.

"Guys, let's swim!" Felix shouts at both of you.

To be honest, you feel comfortable sharing the space with Chris and want to stay in it a bit longer. You shake your head and kindly refuse his offer.

"No, I'm good," you tell him.

The screams and squeals of the girls jumping into the water startle you, more so, because they ditch their bikinis.

"Oh, come on!" Felix grumbles, coming over to you and taking you by the hand.

"You're coming too," he shouts at Chris.

He's forcing you to get up and join him, taking you by the end of the edge of the deck. Since everyone is going in anyway, you have no option but to follow suit but decide to keep your bikini on.

"Wait, wait, I have to take this..." you tell him, untying the outerwear you're wearing.

"I'll help you," Chris says, helping you to take it off of you.

You're shivering as his hands brush the skin on your back but it's nothing compared to when he's taking his top off. You don't think this moment will come but here you are, looking at his body in its glory with the golden rays of the sun hitting him just right.

Impatient, Felix gets ahead and jumps into the sea while shouting some gibberish words out loud.

"Do it together, yeah?" He offers.

"Yeah, okay," you nervous answers.

He holds his hand out at you and you take it without hesitating, he counts from three, and on one, you both jump into the water together.

Everyone is having fun, you see Pablo is going at it with the new girl and Edie is simply having the time of her life. She squeal when she finally acknowledges your presence, waddling her way to you and clinging to you.

"Did you see me kissing him?" she whines,

"You mean sucking his soul out?" You joke.

"I didn't know how many times I kissed him," she whines again, putting her hands around you.

"Don't worry. Lana will know," you tell her.

For this once, you don't want to think of the money. You let yourself enjoy it, this moment and the company you're with, and also the beautiful view of the sunset.

-

YOU: I must admit, I had a lot of fun. I really needed that party.

-

Everyone is already waiting in the cabana for your return from the boat party.

You don't know why you're nervous, maybe it's coming from knowing everything that happened at the boat party and you came back with your hair and bikini damp from swimming.

Since there's no space left, you take the remaining spot that is on the far end of the sofa, sitting far away from Hyunjin.

Lana chimes in not long after everyone has settled down.

"Welcome back," She greets everyone who just came back from the boat party, "And welcome to the two new arrivals."

No one seems to realize the new additions to the retreat until Lana mentions them.

"Thank you, Lana," Emilie says with a smile.

"To test your growth, I prepared a party on a boat with the illustrious presence of some of my former retreat guests: Felix, Avery, and Chris," Lana informs.

Frida reacts with a loud gasp, "Really?"

"Yeah. It was so nice to meet them," Edie answers.

"You had no idea. It was awesome," Saskia adds, making her more envious.

"Damn!" Andy quietly curses next to Hyunjin.

Which makes you glance at Hyunjin and he seems a little tense, his jaws are all clenched yet it makes him more attractive.

"As soon as you left for the party, your friends had to choose whether or not to bet on your loyalty to the principles of the retreat."

A scoff slips out of you because your guess is right, you're not new to Lana's hidden agenda, the boat party was a test and you may not broken any rules but you failed nonetheless.

"We can double the prize money you know," Diego says, "All you had to do was to not break any rules."

"Oh, no..." Saskia cringes.

"What did you bet?" You ask, feeling a little anxious if they choose to bet all of the money.

"We bet to put our trust in you," Andy answers.

And that's where you failed, you could have prevented anyone from breaking the rules but you let them happen.

-

YOU: I never thought that they would bet double, that we weren't going to do anything.

-

Hyunjin is nervous, anxious even but when he finally sees you coming, he feels so relieved. Now that you're back, a new question pops in his head: did you break any rules?

His faith wavers a little as he notices that your bikini is damp and so is your hair, and you sit on the far end of the sofa. He doesn't even dare to ask and waits for someone else to do it for him.

"It's a good time to tell us if you broke any rules," Andy says, taking the role to ask the big question.

Edie's hand raised in the air and the sheer smile on Andy's face falters, "I broke the rules. I kissed Gustav," she admits right away.

"We kissed, yes," the new guy, Gustav, confirms with a sly grin.

"I thought the rules didn't apply outside the retreat," Edie innocently says in an effort to defend her rule break.

"Felix and Chris, and uh... Avery, they were encouraging us to break rules, saying that Lana wasn't there," Saskia delivers a weak argument.

Hyunjin is getting more tense with every detail of the boat party getting exposed in this heated argument.

"We held back at first," Edie calmly remarks.

"But you did give in," Remy says, easily diminishing her remark.

"I regret to inform you that many rule breaks were detected," Lana spoils another detail.

"I thought it was only the two of you," Marie says, pointing at Edie and Gustav, "Was there someone else?"

Hyunjin looks around and deeply hopes that he doesn't see your hand raised in the air, he sees Pablo's hand instead.

"Emilie and I kissed," he admits a little too late.

"They threw away kisses," Andy sighs while pinching the bridge of his nose in distress.

Pablo tries to throw the blame back at Edie, "She kissed a lot."

"Everyone did body shots," Edie reveals another detail and her hand flies in your direction.

"I only did one body shot," you defend yourself, "And I don't think that counts."

Hyunjin is fine with body shots, he has done it a couple of times during parties but his concern is who you did it with.

"We also went skinny dipping," Edouard reveals another thing.

And now skinny dipping? He's so wrong to think that you won't do anything, he slumps in his seat, disappointed.

Frida groans out loud, also slumping in her seat.

"Lana, give us the bill!" Diego says, no longer enjoying this.

"Fuck! It's going to be bad, it's double," Andy says in distress.

It takes Lana a moment to calculate the rule breaks and finally comes up with the final result, "All of these rule breaks have cost the group $72,000."

A minute passes in eerie silence as everyone tries to process how much money have lost at that boat party. There were only five people invited and yet they were capable of spending that much money.

"It must have been awesome being there," Marie sneers with a scowl.

"Of course it was," Pablo unapologetically says, being insensitive to his surroundings.

"The prize fund now stands at $60,000," Lana updates the current prize fund.

There's not much money left and with the new guest, he can't guarantee that it'll stay on that amount for long.

"You have the opportunity to develop and learn to connect. Don't take the process for granted," Lana concludes the session with a warning.

-

HYUNJIN: We are paying the price for something that wasn't our fault. All I can do is laugh.

-

It's close to bedtime and you head straight to the dressing room to take a quick shower and put on a pair of comfortable clothes of camisole and white shorts.

You're not purposely avoiding Hyunjin because at some point you'll have to talk to him, you merely give yourself and him some time to process what happened at the cabana earlier.

As you're doing your skincare routine, you see him entering the dressing room with an apparent scowl on his face and you take this as a cue to talk to him.

As he walks past your chair, you grab him by the hand and look up at him, "Hey, let's talk."

He rather seems reluctant to your invite but you don't want to wait anymore, it's a great time to have a talk since the two of you are alone in the dressing room.

You pat the chair next to you where Edie usually sits, "Come, sit here!"

He obeys you without saying anything, sitting facing you and letting you hold his hand on his lap. You have told everything about the boat party but you know you have to assure him that there's nothing else happened other than that.

"What happened at the boat party, I've already said everything that I did. I only did a body shot and nothing else," you tell him, keeping your tone soft and calm.

He gets quiet for a moment and it's his turn to speak so you wait for him to say anything, rubbing the back of his hand with your thumb.

He slightly slumps on the chair, sending his long legs spreading open in front of you and you know it's not the time for it but you feel tempted to tease him.

"We were all talking about all of you and the things you probably do there," he says.

You let go of his hand and rest your hand on his thigh all the while your eyes are looking at him, "Yeah?"

"I said if it were me, I wouldn't do that because one, out of respect for you and what we have."

Based on experience, you doubt that his act would match his words but you give him the chance to finish his talk.

"Two, for the group," he continues.

He makes it sound like you are this selfish person who does things as she pleases and you don't care about him at all when in fact, you did nothing on that boat party except for that one bodyshot with Avery.

"It wasn't intentional, someone chose to do it with me," you tell him the reason why you did it, not because you wanted to.

"I'm just—" he abruptly stops talking as if he has a change of mind in the middle of a sentence.

"I know what I feel for you and it's just that I can't act like that I'm okay with what you did," he explains.

You retract your hand off of him and grip the edge of your chair, "I told you, I only did one body shot and nothing else."

"You wouldn't like it if I did it," he hastily replies, almost losing himself there as he gives you an intense glare.

You hate to sleep without resolving it but it's obvious that he's angry so it's best to give him time to cool down and you can talk it all out with clear heads the next day.

-

YOU: He almost kissed another girl on a date and what makes him think that he won't do anything at that boat party? [Scoffs]

-

It's when you wake up that you realize that some people were switching beds last night.

Vic is sleeping with Marie while Edouard sleeps with Andy so you guess she already knew about what happened between Edouard and Saskia. At least, she knew it from Edouard himself and not from someone else.

As for you, you're not going into the talk yet. You still cuddle him and give him a morning kiss, you treat him like usual to let him know that nothing changed between you and him. This is just another thing you need to overcome together and deep down, you know you will.

The morning continues with a mumbling mess that is Vic at the breakfast table.

"I'm only going to try again if he can actually win me over," she says, stirring the scrambled egg on her plate with a fork.

You don't have the energy to deal with drama first thing in the morning so you decide not to meddle and risk saying things that upset her more.

"Then let him win you over," Marie from two chairs over tells her.

"I don't think he understands that he really needs to do the work to win me back," Vic grumbles again, dropping her fork onto her plate.

"So tell him," Marie coyly responds.

Vic sighs and runs her hands through his dark long hair, "But I know I'm never going to work things out with Saskia."

You know it's better not to stay away from it but you can't help it when your friends are going against each other, especially over a boy.

You put down your cutlery and look at Vic, "Vic, I think that you're a grown woman, and whether you want to or not, you should work things out with her."

She subtly rolls her eyes in response, not taking your words when it's possible to do so if one of them is open to reconciliation.

"You could figure this out together," you assure her.

"I am not going to talk to this girl. If she wants to talk to me which she won't then I'll talk to her. But she won't," Vic says with her nostrils flaring in anger.

It's obvious that Vic is not open to reconciliation, moreover, it's tricky considering that she has stubbornness in her. Then there's nothing left to do but tell her which side you're taking and it's neither.

"I just want you to understand that I love you and I also like talking to her. I don't want you to think that I'm two-faced," you carefully explain not avoid getting your words twisted.

"I just want everything to be fine because I like you both a lot," you add.

In the afternoon, Lana called everyone to the cabana as usual and she prepared something for everyone there. There's a TV with the word 'Cinelana' on the screen.

"Cinelana?" Edie says in genuine confusion.

Marie puts all of her hair to the side before taking a seat, "Will it be...?" She wildly guessed with a raised eyebrow.

Not long after everyone has taken their seats, the melodic chime comes and the cone lights up to signify Lana's arrival.

"Hello, everyone."

"Hi, Lana!" Everyone replies in unison.

"How are you?" Lana asks.

"Poor," Frida shortly replies.

"Broke and scared," Saskia answers.

To be honest, you feel more scared than broke. Maybe it's coming from knowing that you didn't contribute to that money deduction.

"From what I can see from your behavior, some forms of physical contact can be more sexual than those prohibited at the retreat," Lana says.

You have a feeling that she's about to expose everyone with this Cinelana and that's what you're scared of.

"But it's better to show than tell."

-

YOU: I have no problem showing everything that happened. Showing the thing I did is fine by me. But when it comes to the others, I don't know.

-

"I want you to see yourselves through my eyes."

The ones who went to the boat party seem to be nervous and everyone pretty much knows what Lana is about to show. Hyunjin can only hope that he doesn't see what he doesn't want to see.

"What is she going to show?" Diego curiously asks.

"Is there popcorn?" Marie casually asks.

"May the first session of Cinelana begin," Lana announces.

Cinelana starts with them having a big toast and from there, things escalate quickly, everyone reacts with a lot of gasps and squeals, cheering when they catch someone doing the rule break.

Hyunjin's heart skips a beat when you come on the screen, a girl pours a drink onto your chest and proceeds to drink it straight from it. He sees that you cover your face with your hands, looking flustered.

He feels a little jealous but not the kind that makes him angry, It's the kind that makes him envy. It's even crazier that he doesn't which one he should be more jealous of, the girl who did the body shot on you or you.

"Calm down. This is just the beginning," you tell everyone.

It suddenly turns quiet when the footage of Saskia and Edouard doing body shots on each other. Hyunjin can't help but look to the side, at Vic who looks uncomfortable and displeased with what she's seeing.

Thankfully, the attention is shifted to Edie who's devouring the new guy with ferocious kisses that get everyone hysterically screaming.

"Wow. Edie!" Diego clicks his tongue at her.

The movie ends with them going into the sea naked and Hyunjin is relieved to see that you told the truth to him, in fact, he should be proud that you stick to the principles even though everyone around you doing the opposite.

"And that's why we're poor," Marie comments as the screen turns dark.

Lana chimes once more, "What do you think about the movie?"

"I liked it, Lana," Pablo jokingly says.

"Do you think this behavior is fair to the group? Would anyone act differently?" Lana asks.

That seems to make everyone turn quiet again, offending the ones who went to the boat party. He turns to the side and sees that you open your mouth to speak.

"For me personally, when I got on that boat, that's when it stopped making sense to me. I realize that I would much rather be here than be there," you say.

You turn your head at him and smile, an unexpected gesture that makes him feel touched. All of a sudden, he doesn't know why he's mad in the first place, you've told him the truth and that should be enough for him.

"I think I'd have acted differently if I knew how much it would affect some people here," Edouard adds with a defeated look on his face.

"Now is the time to think about how are you going to move forward. I really hope you try harder," Lana says.

In other words, Lana demands everyone to do better from this moment on. Hyunjin figures that he should do better too in building this connection with you, he doubted you when he should have trusted you just like you trust him.

"That's all for today," Lana concludes the session.

Now is the time to pick up the conversation from last night. He takes you to the firepit to get some privacy so the two of you can talk comfortably.

"So, what do you think?" You ask, folding your legs on the sofa facing him.

Hyunjin cracks a smile and answers, "I can't even be mad at that. That was so hot."

You burst out laughing and playfully hit his chest, he catches your hand to stop you, pulling you onto his lap. He looks up at you and brushes your hair to the side, "I think I was made because you were gone the whole day," he honestly admits.

A smile rises on your face, "You missed me?"

"So much," he shamelessly answers.

"You're so into me, mmh?" You ask, putting your forehead against his.

"I'm so into you," he shortly replies, ignoring how stupid he sounded.

"Me too," you tell him with your hand cupping his jaw, "I'm so into you."

It's one of those moments that Hyunjin wishes he could freely kiss you just to prove his words to you with actions and it stresses him that he can't do that.

As if you read his mind, you land a soft kiss on his nose to compensate for not being able to kiss his lips and smile when you pull away. It doesn't quite satisfy his needs but it's enough to make his heart pitter-pattering inside his chest.

"We're even now," he jokingly says.

You hit his chest again a little harder this time, "Excuse me? This was different!" You strongly disagree.

He laughs and pulls you closer, what he did that time with Saskia is far worse than someone doing a body shot on you. He nods and immediately agrees with you.

"Okay, okay, but you owe me a body shot," he says, trying to get something out of it.

"That's fair," you agree to it.

-

HYUNJIN: My honest reaction? I liked the movie. It's better than I thought [chuckles]

-

The drama between Vic, Edouard, and Saskia continues onto the next day.

It gets even messier when the girls are doing makeup in the dressing room, it was a nice and quiet afternoon until Vic starts a fight, unprovoked.

"Do you think Edouard was hitting on her?" She asks you, fully aware that Saskia is there on the opposite side of the vanity table, curling her hair in peace.

Hearing that she is being indirectly addressed, Saskia puts down her curling iron and looks at Vic.

"No, he wasn't hitting on me, Vic. It's not like that," she tells him.

Vic acts nonchalantly, she continues putting foundation on her face as she talks, "Then what was it like?"

"He wasn't hitting on me and I wasn't hitting on him either," Saskia remarks.

"If you were hitting on him, then I have a problem with that," Vic argues more instead of dropping the conversation there.

"You think I hit on him? For God's sake, Victoria, don't be silly!" Saskia says with a sarcastic scoff.

The fact that Saskia addresses Vic by her full name only means that she has struck her nerves.

"No, I mean it," Vic keeps arguing.

You hate to get caught in the middle of the conflict so does everyone else on the vanity table but to meddle in is not the best option either.

'Yeah, keep believing that men are so honest. Men always talk their way out of things and the woman is the slut, the woman is the whore," Saskia says, still managing to curl her hair despite being in the middle of an argument.

Vic roughly puts down her makeup brush onto the table with a clang, "But if you led him on—"

Saskia cuts her off to defend herself, "Everyone was drinking, and when you drink—"

And Vic cuts her off midsentence in return, "You led him to believe you wanted him."

Saskia scoffs again and stops doing things altogether, "Oh, so you mean I can't drink? I can't get excited. I can't have fun at a party?"

You grab Vic's hand to stop her from keeping going and escalate things further, filling the room with palpable animosity. You don't want to be seen as taking anyone's side but no one is trying to stop them from coming at each other and turning it into a whole fight.

Looking around for help, you have no one to turn to but the cone perched on the shelf in the dressing room. Before you can ask for help, she chimes in.

Things are getting out of hand that Lana has to intervene, she gathers the three in the bedroom to talk and hopefully, they get to work it out together.

Since there's a party tonight, you continue doing your makeup with the rest of the girls while hoping for the best outcome for the three of them.

You still feel a little tense from being caught in the middle of conflict and Hyunjin seems to notice it. He comes from behind you, putting all of your hair away to the side so he can kiss your neck.

With his hand wrapped around your neck to keep you still, he gently sucking on the skin. You're squealing as he keeps placing ticklish kisses along your shoulder blade.

"Oh, I'm jealous," says the new girl, Emilie.

Somehow, it feels good to know that your relationship is making someone jealous. Hyunjin places another kiss on your cheek before leaving for the bathroom.

"Let's be a throuple," Emilie says as she sits on Saskia's chair.

"A sincere relationship with three people," she explains as if you don't know what it means.

You almost broke up with him when you knew he almost kissed another girl and what makes her think that you'll be okay sharing Hyunjin with her? You give her a pass because she's new so you awkwardly chuckle in response.

-

YOU: Back off, girl. I'm not into this throuple business.

-

It's a real party when everyone is getting along well and having fun.

The talk seems to be a success with Vic looking so much better, she's back to her chipper mood and she's dancing with Edouard. On the other hand, you sense that things between her and Saskia are not doing that well but at least, they're staying civil to each other now.

Putting drama aside, you and Hyunjin are doing better than ever. You trust each other more now and your connection is getting stronger, the next plan is to show true growth in your relationship to earn a green light.

Hyunjin hoists you against his body until your feet are off the ground, you hurriedly cling to him by putting your arms around his shoulders and your legs around his waist.

"Is this how we're going to do it?" You jokingly ask with a sly grin on your face and your hand massages the nape of his neck.

"In front of everybody? Yeah, that's the idea," he playfully responds.

The fun time has to end with Lana being a party pooper as usual. Everyone knows what to do when the chime comes, heading to the cabana like animals about to get slaughtered. Considering that she crashed the party, she'd better have some good news for the group.

"Hi, Lana. Do you have another movie?" Diego jokingly asks.

"Do you want her to show yours?" Edie pokes fun at him.

Lana skips the casual greeting and goes straight into the talk, you hate whenever that happens because it means she's not pleased with something. But everyone has been behaving well, especially after that huge blow to the prize money at the boat party.

"I see how you talk a lot about finding a connection but I also see that some of you do little about it," Lana says.

There's still hope that this going to turn out well and you cling to that hope.

"Connecting is not necessarily trying to be a couple, but opening up to the process and being aware that mistakes are part of any learning process."

Everyone stays quiet, no one is saying anything but intently listening to what Lana says to know where this talk leads.

"Getting it wrong is one thing. Giving up on the process is another. And that can no longer continue to happen here on my retreat."

"Y-yeah?" Edie stammers, sensing that Lana is onto something, something unpleasant.

"I detected some of you have a lack of interest in new connections. Therefore I need to continue my work here without the presence of some people."

It's only a minute ago you thought about how you need to show growth in your relationship and now you're worried that you haven't done enough. Your hand immediately grabs Hyunjin's as you close your eyes, anxious.

"Two of you must leave the retreat tonight," Lana announces.

-

YOU: And we thought we'd get good news [exhales]

-

The tension in the room heightens as Lana is about to announce the two people being sent home tonight.

Hyunjin is nervous and so is everyone because, at this point, it could be anyone. Lana sees everything and he admits that he hasn't shown enough progress which puts him at risk of leaving the retreat.

"One of you has spoken many times about being a closed-off person, and couldn't see how the retreat would change that," Lana explains the reason why she chose this person.

Hyunjin can think of someone who fits that description, he turns his head to the side where Marie is sitting and she kind of guesses who it is as well.

"The second person I'm eliminating tried opening up to the process at first but it seems that they lost focus on the purpose of the retreat," Lana gives another explanation on the reason why she sent home the second person.

For this one, Hyunjin can't tell who it is but he prays inside that it's not him. He hopes that Lana gives him so more time to continue building this connection with you.

"Therefore, their stay at this retreat has come to an end."

He slowly inhales air and quietly lets it out while continuously wishing that Lana would not call his name.

"Exiting the retreat tonight are..."

He sees no one is feeling safe either because no one wants to go home yet.

"...Pablo and Marie."

He feels relieved that it's not him but it doesn't make him feel good either knowing that someone else has to go. He gets up from his seat to give Pablo and Marie a farewell hug for he found friendship in them.

"Pablo and Marie, it's time for you to leave the retreat," Lana orders.

Everyone standing up to send them off with a wave goodbye and sending well wishes their way.

Tonight started fun and it turned into the opposite in a flip of a switch, but that's life, we never know what's going to happen next.

What Hyunjin knows is that he's grateful that he's still here. He rests his head on your neck as the two of you lie on the bed still dressed in your party costumes, he puts his arm across your chest and pulls you close.

"I'm happy we still have each other," he softly whispers to you.

You endearingly brush his head and place a sweet peck on his forehead, "Me too, baby."

Lana has given him more time in the retreat when it could have been him going home tonight and for that, he feels grateful because he's not ready to go, he can't even imagine himself leaving you.

-

HYUNJIN: It's been hard, but at the same time, I... understand the situation.

-

This morning is the same as like other morning in the retreat.

The lights are on as a wake-up call for everyone at the same time every day. You wake up and see Hyunjin the moment you open your eyes, you give him a morning kiss on the cheek.

You run your hand through his hair and softly greet him, "Morning, baby."

He smiles in response and mumbles, "Morning."

He takes your hand, puts it around him, and leans in to make a trail of kisses on your inner arm, continuing it to your shoulder and neck.

"Morning, fam!" Edie cheerfully greets everyone in the room who is still stuck in their beds.

"It's crazy that sometimes I can see this mole of yours and sometimes I don't," you say in bewilderment as your index finger poked the faint mole under his left eye.

He closes his eyes and blissfully smiles at you, "Want to hear something crazier?"

"Yeah. What?"

"You're getting sexier and sexier every day," he answers while squeezing the flesh on your waist.

"Ouch!" You yelp in pain but that only encourages him to tighten his hold around you.

It's a peaceful morning until someone recognizes what is missing in this room.

"Wait, where's Lana?" Frida asks.

You scramble to turn on the bed to see the cone is missing from its usual place, she usually sits prettily on the small round table in the corner of the room but she's not there.

"Shit! Lana's gone," Edie says, her mouth stays open.

You exchange a glance with Hyunjin but he's also befuddled with Lana's sudden disappearance, well, a staff probably took the cone away while we were asleep but there must be a reason they're doing it.

"We're always in a throuple with her so it's weird Lana is not here when we wake up," Saskia says while cuddling with Remy on their bed.

"She's out on a date with Siri," Andy jokingly says with a satisfied laugh.

"Maybe Lana prepared breakfast for us," Diego wildly guesses, "she's in the kitchen being Lana Ramsey."

Everyone laughs at that one but it starts to get serious when everyone is getting their breakfast and Lana is not there, Andy goes to check the cabana just in case someone misplaced her.

"She's not there either," Andy returns with an answer.

"Do we have to find her?" Gustav confoundedly asks, not knowing what to do since he's still new in this retreat.

"Just don't make us dig sand to find her, please?" Edie grumbles, getting flashbacks from that first day we arrived at the villa.

"Do you think Lana's disappearance is good or bad for us?" Edouard asks, curious about what everyone thinks of it.

"Maybe she needs some time alone, guys," Saskia coyly says with a glass of orange juice in her hand.

Everyone comes up with various theories about Lana's disappearance and they react differently to it, some are nervous, a few are excited and the rest are a mix of both.

"Oh no, she's not here either," Emilie whines as she looks around searching for the cone in the dressing room.

"Maybe she's tired of us?" Frida coyly says, plopping onto her usual seat at the vanity table.

Vic hands you a bottle of sunspray and turns her back to you, "As long as she doesn't take the money with her, I'm cool," she says.

You turn on your chair to help her spray her backside evenly and make sure you don't miss a spot, you've been doing a very good job at it considering that her skin remains pale while everyone else has gotten tan lines.

"I think Lana is watching us from afar you know when you leave kids by themselves to see if they're going to misbehave or not?" Saskia comes up with another theory.

Her theory is the most plausible one, it's Lana we're talking about, just because she isn't there doesn't mean she's not watching. She wasn't there during the boat party yet she knew everything that happened.

"She probably sitting in the control room laughing at us right now," Edie jokes.

However, the scariest part of this is not the disappearance but what will happen with Lana not around to keep everyone's behavior?

-

YOU: This can't be good. She's just gone like that?

-

Wait, is everything allowed now?

With Lana disappearing this can only mean that the rules no longer exist as well and that gets Hyunjin excited. He's been good all these times so he thinks he deserves, at least, a little something for his good behavior.

"Lana is gone. The rules are off," Hyunjin mutters as he styles his hair next to Diego in the bathroom.

Diego chuckles and sprays some hairspray into his hair, "I don't know, man, I think that's a bad idea," he disagrees with him.

"Why don't we kiss to test the water?" Hyunjin boldly suggests.

Diego shoves him to the side in reaction to his crazy idea, he gets it that he's been careful with Frida ever since they got the green light. He then leaves the bathroom only for Edouard to come and take his spot.

"Lana's gone. What does that mean?"

Hyunjin's question is not merely a question, it's a test to find out which side Edouard is on: the side that wants to break the rules or the other side that thinks Lana is still watching.

"There's no rule, bro. Know what I mean?" Edouard says with a devilish grin as he combs his hair to the back.

This is the energy that Hyunjin seeks from someone and he feels more confident now knowing he's sharing the same brainwave with someone in this retreat, an accomplice to his mischief.

"Bro, I'm definitely breaking the rules tonight," Hyunjin boldly remarks with a wild, wide grin.

"Been holding it in for so long," Edouard says in continuation of Hyunjin's remark.

"This is going to be a mad night!" Hyunjin concludes with a wicked grin on his face. He raises both hands in the air at Edouard and claps their hands together for double high fives.

Tonight, Hyunjin wants to do a lot of things with you and he'll make sure that it's going to happen.

-

HYUNJIN: My plan for tonight is to give her the best night of her life [smirks]

-

"As soon as I found out Lana's gone, everything I learned from the retreat has gone out of the window," Vic openly admits.

The dressing room is buzzing and the girls are exceptionally energized tonight, maybe it's the fact that the cock-blocker is nowhere in sight. Vic's words are true, it feels like everyone is back to their default settings and forgot about the purpose of the retreat.

"Okay, but out of all of the boys, who is most likely to break the rules tonight?" Emilie curiously asks while swinging her mascara wand in the air.

"Pfft... I hope it's Edouard," Vic mumbles.

Edie smacks her lips together then places her hand on your forehand, "To be honest, I think it's Hyunjin," she says, sticking her face at you.

"Oh, yeah," Saskia agrees with an exclamation mark drawn on her face.

Frida chuckles and glares at you, "You better be satisfied tonight 'cause if you ain't, girl..."

"You'll be satisfied tonight," Edie teases you with a sing-song tone while shaking your shoulders.

Their assumption is only making you nervous because of how it comes close to the truth. Hyunjin is and has been ogling at you. Not that he never ogled at you before, he does it more often today and it's not hard to read his mind when he's acting like that the whole day.

Hyunjin chooses the firepit to spend some alone time with you, he makes you sit on his lap even though the sofa could fit seven people. You don't have to second guess everything, you know exactly what he's trying to do.

"Are you alright?" He asks, splaying the hand resting on the small of your back.

"I'm feeling good, babe," you reply with a convincing smile and hope it's enough to hide how nervous you are inside.

His other hand rubs down your thigh and plays with the hem of your skirt, all the while he's putting on this gaze that is soft yet intense and lustful.

"You look very, very cute," he compliments.

He touches the strap of your top and then your hair, "Cute dress, cute smile, cute everything."

Wow! He really is trying hard to win you over and put that sweet mouth to use, and you need to toughen up more.

"Thanks. You look gorgeous," you compliment back.

Hyunjin is wearing a plain white shirts and leaves the top three buttons open, exposing his firm chest muscles and soft skin, inviting you to touch.

Instead of giving in to your intrusive thoughts, you start buttoning his shirts.

"Why are you buttoning up my shirts?" He asks while chuckling.

"So you don't get cold," you simply answer with a suppressed laugh.

He ends up unbuttoning them again and parts the opening of his shirt wider to entice you more. You look away to keep your composure and look back at him when get yourself under control.

But Hyunjin steps up his game, he mixes his sweet words with some physical touches, weakening your defense system with each passing second.

He brushes your hair to the side and holds it there, "You know I never thought I'd meet somebody like you. You're such a lovely person," he mutters to you.

You reach for his hand and put it down, you're holding it on your lap after.

"That's very sweet of you," you reply with a smile.

He brings your hand to his mouth and then places a soft kiss on your knuckles, reminding you of how plush his lips are.

If this keeps going, you don't know how long you can restrain yourself.

-

YOU: I'm not sure if Lana's testing us, but I'm going to try really hard to not break the rules.

-

Hyunjin knows which side you're in.

You don't want to break rules while Hyunjin is doing exactly the opposite of that. He can see your defense is up, you're a little rigid, you're being cautious with everything you do, and trying so hard not to fall to his charms.

It's a good thing that Hyunjin has a lot of charms and a strong will to crack your defense. He did it once, he just needs to do it again, except that he needs to do it better this time.

He swipes his thumb across your lips and does it carefully to not smudge your lipstick.

"I miss kissing you," he says in his low, sultry voice, "I want to feel those soft lips again."

You nervously chuckle and slip your hand into the hair on the back of his head, "We've known each other better and I don't think we need to put pressure on ourselves to do anything," you tell him.

Hyunjin drops his other hand to your leg, resting it on the back of your thigh and lightly rubbing the skin with his thumb.

"We could do something," he says with a low laugh, "We can break the rules tonight. Like... why waste the opportunity?"

You chuckle again, tilting your head to the side, away from him to put a safe space between you and him. But, he only needs to close that safe space so he leans in.

"A little kiss, come on," he sweetly whispers.

You cup his jaw and fondly smile at him, "I'm rather suspicious that this is actually a test," you say.

He playfully pinches the skin on the back of your thigh and seductively smiles, "Just a bit of fun. No one will find out," he assures you.

He gets a move on by planting kisses on your neck, fluttering little kisses that he's sure make you tingling inside. He puts his hand on the nape of your neck so he can angle your head as he pleases.

He tilts your head to the side and presses his mouth to your ear, "You're so special to me."

He notices that you're slowly lowering your guard down, your eyes are fluttering shut and your hand helplessly gripping the front of his shirt. All it takes is a bit more of his charm.

"You're my special, special, special," he places a kiss along your jaw every time he repeats that one word.

"Special girl," he murmurs for the last time and then he crashes his lips against you

There is no way you will say no to his kiss, not when he kisses you so passionately, lathering your lips with his, soft on soft, slowly and tenderly.

He pries open your mouth with his tongue to taste you more, he uses his teeth to gently bite your lips and puts his hand in the right place to gain access to deepen the kiss.

You break the kiss first and immediately gasp for air, the next thing you do is wipe the lipstick mark around his mouth.

"Does the color look good on me?" He playfully asks.

"Yeah," you shortly reply.

"Put some more then," he teases.

This is only the first rule break of many and it's already a success.

-

HYUNJIN: Told you, Hwang Hyunjin always gets what he wants [nonchalantly shrugs]

-

Now that he's already got what he wants, you hope it's enough for him.

Honestly, you didn't know how you also needed that until he kissed you. You stay in the firepit while everyone else is starting to turn in for the night and the two of you are the only ones still outside.

He brushes your hair, putting it away from your face, and holds your head in his hands like you're a fragile object.

"Should we do something else?" He jokingly asks.

Gosh. You hope he's not seriously asking to do more than a kiss. You pretend to not hear it and take his hands in yours.

"It's getting late," you tell him with a pout and half-shut eyes, showing him that you're getting drowsy even though you're not.

He gently rubs your chin and softly asks, "Want to head inside?"

You nod and smile, "Mm-hmm."

It's a relief that Hyunjin stops trying, you feel like you can properly breathe now as you get off his lap. He gets up from the sofa too and leads the way back to the villa.

You may have failed not breaking the rules but you've tried your best to show some restraint until Hyunjin stops by the terrace and turns his head to the side.

"Want to check the suite first?" He asks.

You nervously chuckle and jokingly ask, "Is it even open?"

Your words only encourage him to take you there and check it. You deeply wish the suite is locked or else, you don't have any other reasons not to get in there with him.

To your dismay, the suite is unlocked.

Hyunjin opens the door and lets you in first. The suite looks exactly like the last time you've seen it, except, there's no chilled champagne, no rose petals on the bed and it's dim with no lit candles in sight.

He closes the door behind him and then goes straight to the bed, sitting on the end of the bed with his legs spreading open.

You're nervous to even get close to him, afraid of what it would lead to. You stand in between his legs, not sure what to do in this enclosed space with him.

Hyunjin puts his hands on each side of your waist and pulls you close, he then buries his head in your chest. You both stay like that for a moment with you softly scratching his head.

He then lifts his head and looks up at you, "I want it to do it," he straightforwardly says.

He loops his arms around your waist and closes the gap between your bodies, "Do you want to do it?"

You don't want to be a hypocrite by saying no when the truth is you want it, you want it so bad that you don't want to resist anymore.

"I do," you honestly answer.

"But it's a big decision," you add with a thin smile.

With Hyunjin, you know you want more than just casually dating each other, you want this to be a genuine relationship, and in a genuine relationship, having sex means taking a step further into a more established relationship.

"You know how I feel about you so let me show you that," he says.

He slightly rises from the bed just to place a kiss on your jaw, "I'm only waiting for you to say the word," he says.

The moment you step into the suite, you know that you've made up your mind and honestly, you're tired of pretending like you can resist him.

You take a deep breath and hold his head in your face, you look into his eyes to seek assurance that you're ready for the next step.

Instead of using words, you plant your lips on him and let your kisses answer it for you.

-

YOU: How am I going to resist Hyunjin?

-

Hyunjin wastes not another second, he takes your top off, exposing your half-naked body to him and he gladly buries his head in between your breasts. He takes one into his mouth while the other one is being fondled by his big hand with his fingers circling your nipple.

"Baby, be gentle, please?" You whine when he accidentally sucks too harder.

He keeps your words in mind but sometimes his body won't obey his commands, it's like it has a mind of its own, a mind that is so hungry for you and only knows a lot of ways to devour you.

He lifts your leg, making you straddle him to satisfy his need for closeness. He crashes his lips against yours again and again yet, can't get enough of it.

Without him knowing, you manage to undo all of the buttons on his shirt and he helps by getting rid of it for you, hurriedly tosses it aside so he can hold you again.

"You never cease to amaze me, baby," he tells you before roughly leaning in to kiss you again.

It's quiet in the room except for the sounds of his lips placing kisses all over you. Your skirt is all hunched up around your waist, your hands are cupping your breasts and Hyunjin keeps going down south, continuing the trail of kisses to your feet.

He then kneels on the bed and looks down at you, his dark lustful eyes traveling down your body, making him realize that you still have your skirt on.

He tugs his fingers on the waistband of your skirt and softly he says, "Raise your hips for me, baby."

You obey right away, raising your hips high enough to let Hyunjin pull your skirt down and off your legs, leaving you with nothing but lacy underwear, the fabric is so thin he can see through it, the thing that endlessly tantalizes him.

He grabs both of your legs, holding them close to his chest before parting them open. He turns his head to the side, bringing your ankle close to his mouth to kiss it. He doesn't stop there, the kisses continue to your inner thighs.

Hyunjin doesn't bother to remove it first, he dives right into your clothed cunt, his greedy mouth full of your flesh and your underwear soaked wet from his saliva.

He's enjoying, enjoying it so much that he puts your underwear to the side so he can taste you better, his slick tongue and his soft lips drenched in your wetness.

He can hear you moaning but it's somewhat muffled, he pulls away for a moment and looks at you between your legs.

"Moan louder for me, baby. I can't hear you with my head between your thighs."

Well, the only way he can make you moan louder is by pushing the right button. He adds his fingers to the combination, giving you the utmost pleasure by moving them in sync.

You keep arching your back and grinding at his mouth, enough to tell him that he only needs to continue his delightful assault to get you to your release.

"Baby, oh..." your voice cracks as your eyes screwed shut, overwhelmed with pleasure.

He kisses your inner thigh as he watches your cunt soaking wet with a mix of your essence and his saliva, but it's your gushing hole that makes him impatient to be inside you.

"Why are you so good with your mouth?" You ask in awe, half panting from all the moaning.

Well, Hyunjin takes pride in his prowess at giving head and it gives a boost of confidence to show you what else he's good at. He pulls the duvet until it covers both of your bodies so as to not expose yourselves to the cameras installed in the room.

Under the cover, he manages to take your underwear off without looking and plays with your bundle of nerves after, feeling it swelling and pulsating under his touch.

"I'm good with my hands too," he says.

You shyly smile and pull him for a kiss, but you show him you want the other thing. You put your hand inside his jeans and his boxer altogether, easily finding his hard cock and wrapping your hand around it.

"So hard. So big," you breathlessly murmur against his lips.

"So ready to be inside you," he finishes your sentence.

You crack a laugh and peck his lips, "Well, what are you waiting for?"

It's good to know he's not the only one being impatient here, but first, he has to get rid of his jeans and put

"Give me a minute to get a condom on," he gives you a peck before rolling to the side of the bed.

He sits on the edge of the bed, rummaging through the small drawers on the bedside table to find a condom, and then takes his jeans off. He unwraps the foil wrapper and carefully rolls the rubber down his length, it's not hard to do so when he's fully erect and it's all because of you.

Once he makes sure he properly put the condom on, he climbs onto the bed and gets under the duvet with you, arms instantly wrapped around you.

The only fear that still lingers in him is that he won't last long considering that he's been refrained from any sexual activities for these past couple weeks. What if he cum the second he put himself inside you? He wants to make the first time having sex with you a special moment, not a humiliating one.

"I want to do it with you," you tell him out of the blue.

It's as if you heard his mind, you assure him that this is what you and there's no pressure whatsoever, you merely want to do it with him.

"And I want to do it with you," he says back with a soft smile on his small face.

You put your hands around his neck and pull him for a kiss, "Let's do it together."

In that moment, Hyunjin gets hit by the realization that everything else doesn't matter. What matters is this moment with you.

He kisses you, fueling himself for what he's about to do next, and while brushing your hair to the side, he says, "I'm going in, yeah?"

You nod with a smile, permitting him to enter the most sacred part of your body.

It's tricky to keep the duvet from sliding off of him as he kneels on the bed again, he then takes your legs and parts them open. He starts by repeatedly rubbing his length against your slit, using your bodily fluid as a lubricant.

With the reminder to be gentle, he uses his tip to tease your entrance before slowly easing himself inside, little by little. You're breathlessly moaning as you keep taking his length so well that Hyunjin can only watch as his cock disappeared into you with your mouth agape.

The only time his eyes stray away from your cunt is to see you moaning with your eyes closed and your hands squeezing your breasts.

A moan slips past his mouth when he is fully sheathed inside your warm, velvety walls and he's not ashamed of it. He keeps groaning as the pleasure of being inside you gets to him, sending his brain close to short-circuit.

He glides his hand up your front and holds the hand cupping your left breast, "Do you see that, baby?"

Hyunjin is eyeing his cock fully buried inside you to the hilt, the image is being imprinted in the back of his head as he thinks out loud.

"I look so perfect inside you, don't you think?"

You nod in a way that is innocent but arousing at the same time which reminds him of how much he wants to ruin you.

He rubs his hand up and down your inner thigh, admiring the view of your body and how it's connected with him.

"You feel so good," he lowly mutters.

He glides his hand up to your chest and kneads on your breast, "I think I need a moment."

Hyunjin takes a minute to adjust himself inside you, how good it feels to be wrapped in your warmth, tight walls, and the way you clench and unclench around him in the slightest of movement.

He kisses you hard and deep to finally start moving and feeling his cock launches deeper and deeper for every thrust into you.

He keeps kissing you and when he's not, moans keep spilling out of your mouth, and calling his name in between those moans. Your bodies eventually move in sync and work together to chase that release.

When Hyunjin finally snaps, he has a moment of clarity. He couldn't believe that he managed to not do it the last time he was here, he had that much restraint in him but now, all bets are off and he's fully aware that it's his biggest gamble yet.

-

HYUNJIN: Best believe, I'm going all in tonight.

-

The next morning, Lana is still no-show.

You know she'll be back at some point but you feel a little relieved that she hasn't, you don't want to deal with that yet. You still want to live in this bubble together with Hyunjin.

"Good morning, angel baby," he sweetly whispers into your ear as he spoons you from behind.

You giggle as he places ticklish kisses on your bare shoulder and neck. He holds you close as he rests his head in the crook of your neck to get a little extra sleep.

The two of you returned late from the suite and sneaked into the bedroom while everyone else had fallen asleep. You see that no one is suspecting anything but Lana's sinister disappearance.

"Lana, girl, how long are you going to hide?" Frida asks while twisting her curly hair and securing it with a hair claw.

Thinking about Lana gets you a little uneasy, you break away from Hyunjin's hold and sit on the bed, offering your lap to let him rest his head on.

He gladly does that, resting his head on your lap and putting your hand in his hair, asking you to play with his dark, silky locks.

"Lana is not running away with our money, right?" Andy asks in a panic.

It's funny that he puts a sense of ownership over it when it's no one's money in the first place, and Lana has the right to run away with the money if she wants to.

"Did anyone break the rules last night though?" Diego asks around, scanning the room with his eyes.

Everyone is playing innocent, shaking their heads or completely ignoring the question like you and Hyunjin did. Avoiding it doesn't mean you're not free of guilt, it's there and it's pooling in the pit of your stomach, making you feel faint.

After lunch, you share the hammock with Hyunjin, simply enjoying each other's presence and the beautiful view of the sea.

"Last night felt like a dream," he says out of the blue.

You get butterflies whenever you recall moments from last night and you find yourself smiling like a fool, "Yeah."

The memories are still fresh in your brain, you remember every detail from the way he looked at you, touched you, kissed you, where he put his hand on your body, and oh... just everything.

He puts his arm around you and puts his head against yours, "I didn't regret doing it with you. It was special to me," he tells you.

"You made me feel special," you sincerely tell him because that's what he made you feel last night: nothing less than special.

"Last night, we took a big step in our relationship," he says.

You nod in agreement.

"Whatever happens, we're in it together," he says, pressing a kiss on your temple.

Of course, he knows that you need comfort and assurance, that's why he said those words. You gently hold his jaw and place a tender kiss on his cheek.

"We're in it together," you repeat his words back to him with a smile.

Hyunjin is right, whatever happens, you shouldn't be afraid because you're not alone, you're in it together with him.

When you walk back to the villa, Andy comes running toward the two of you, his blond hair bouncing on his head.

"What's going on?" You ask him.

"It's Lana. She's back," Andy answers.

-

YOU: I knew it was all too good to be true [exhales]

-

"Anxiety is back, my friend," Edouard shouts as he takes a seat on the curved sofa.

No shit. Your legs are shaking, your hands are sweating and you press your lips together so that it forms a thin line on your face. Even with Hyunjin sitting next to you, you can't seem to relax.

"Even though my conscience is clear, I'm tense," Frida says then lets out a sigh.

The cone is there on the table and she's quietly glaring at you. When she chimes, you almost jump on your seat.

Everyone is gasping in response to her return, even though you know no one is expecting she will be back this soon.

"Hello, everyone," Lana starts with her usual greeting.

"Hi, Lana," you weakly reply with your knee bouncing against the floor.

"Yesterday, I disappeared from the villa to test how you would behave when left to your own devices. Just as you will be in the real world after my retreat," Lana explains.

You do not like where this is going but you have nowhere to go either, you have to face the music.

"Despite my absence, my sensors kept monitoring your every move," Lana further reveals.

"I knew it!" Diego exclaims, triumphantly fisting the air.

Emilie shakes her head and sighs, "It was all too good to be true.

Your guess is not off the mark either, you were right that this was all just a test from Lana and you clearly failed.

"I am very disappointed to report that there were several breaches of the rules," Lana informs.

This is where the witch hunt begins, everyone is looking at each other and trying to spot any guilty faces. Somehow, you manage to keep a straight face despite your heart beating out of your chest.

"Anyone want to start?" Diego asks.

You see Remy and Saskia are glancing at each other and then she turns her head to face everyone again.

"We had a kiss," Saskia comes clean.

"We had a chat, we got carried on. Just once, I swear," Remy explains the details and ends it with a sincere apology.

"There was another breach of the rules," Lana will not stop exposing the rule breakers until they come out with the truth.

Remy and Saskia had it easy because it was their first time breaking the rule and it was only just a kiss. You can't compare it to what you've done with Hyunjin.

"We also kissed, Edouard and I," Vic immediately admits, not holding back from telling everyone about it.

"I just thought that the rules were off," Edouard coyly explains, but the grin on his face tells otherwise.

"Told you, Lana was watching the whole time," Andy tells him.

"I'm sorry," Edouard quickly apologizes to end the conversation.

"The prize fund now stands at $48,000," Lana updates the current amount of prize money.

Everyone must think that's the end of it, that no one else breaking the rules and losing $12,000 is the worst anyone could have done to the prize fund.

You hate to break it to them but they haven't heard the worst of it, you look at Hyunjin and he's pinching at his lower lip which is something he does whenever he's nervous.

"However, there was an additional, serious breach of the rules," Lana further reveals.

-

YOU: I don't know what's coming but Hyunjin and I might be in some trouble.

-

Hyunjin knows he's got to be a big boy and owns up to his mistake. Also, he can't stand seeing you all tense and anxious next to him.

Before it gets messy and uncomfortable for everyone, he leans forward in his seat and starts talking.

"Last night, we... uh," Hyunjin couldn't find any words that would help him soften the blow.

He takes a deep breath and tries again, "Last night we took a step further—"

He gets cut off as everyone else starts groaning in response, knowing the rest of the sentence without him needing to finish it. A few of them seem to have expected this to happen and most of them are disappointed in him.

"This is all my fault, I messed up and I do feel bad," he sincerely says.

He looks at everyone, each and every one of them eye to eye, then with all of his heart, he apologizes.

"I'm sorry," he earnestly says.

"You yet again failed to show any form of restraint and broke the ultimate rule of my retreat, sexual intercourse," Lana says.

Hyunjin didn't think that it would hit him this hard, he may have said he did not regret what he did last night but he regretted acting so selfishly.

"There was $48,000 in the prize fund but because of your numerous rule breaks last night, your prize fund is now at $0," Lana finally drops the shocking news.

There's no money left in the pot anymore and it is all his fault, he understands if everyone is disappointed in him or even hates him for it. He deserves it.

"The prize fund is at $0. However, there will be more tests and opportunities to replenish the prize fund," Lana suddenly shares uplifting news.

It's very rare for her to share good news after bad ones and the mood turns a little lighter, everyone is cheering and applauding for the good news.

"Yes, Lana!" Diego exclaims while clapping his hands together.

"Now I need everyone on their best behavior!" Frida scolds everyone.

But as we all know, happiness is fleeting because Lana hasn't finished with the announcement yet.

"But not for all of you."

Everyone knows what that means and it means she's going to send someone home. He hates to admit it but he has a feeling that Lana is going to send you and him out of here.

"Oh, my days!" Edie whines, fanning her face as she gets red all over from holding her tears.

"No, please, Lana," Saskia hopelessly begs at the cone.

His thought somehow manifests into reality as Lana calls both of your names and his heart drops to his stomach.

"Please stand up!" Lana orders.

Hyunjin can't even feel the ground beneath him as he gets up from the sofa and takes a stand, he puts his arm around you and holds you close, providing you comfort even though he knows you're just as anxious as him.

"As a couple, you have broken the most rules but one of you has shown more disregard for the rules than the other. And that person will be going home," Lana announces.

"Oh, my god," Edie whines again, burying her face in her hands.

"The person leaving the retreat is..."

Deep down, Hyunjin knows that Lana is sending him home, he looks at you and holds you tighter. He can see that you know that he knows.

"...Hyunjin."

-

HYUNJIN: At the end of the day, you can only point one finger and that's at me.

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[hintsofhoney]

Freak

Pairing(s): Eddie Munson x F!Reader

Summary: You can't get enough of Eddie's cock and he can't get enough of you.

Tags: 18+, rough sex, pwp, p in v, smut, dirty talk, praise kink, slight degradation kink, light anal play, rough oral sex (male receiving), crying during sex, fluff

Word Count: 1.1k

A/N: Started this last night at 1 a.m. and my brain wouldn't let me sleep until I finished it, so, here it is. Also using this as my entry for @huffle-pissed’s Vibes and Valentines challenge (months late, I know, ‘cause I suck) where my prompt was, “You like it that much, huh?”, and that’ll be in bold. Thank you to my darling @makeadealwithdean for beta-ing! GIF is mine. Hope you guys enjoy!

You can also read me on Ao3!

EDDIE MUNSON MASTERLIST | STRANGER THINGS MASTERLIST | MAIN MASTERLIST

“Jesussss fuck,” Eddie lets out, low and breathy as he watches you take him all the way in your mouth. You’re on your knees, thighs spread, topless, cheer skirt still on, and Eddie reaches down to brush some hair out of your face when you look up at him through your lashes, gentle and loving, like you’re not gagging on his cock. He grabs himself at his base with one hand before pulling back, and you release him with a soft ‘pop’. “Look at me, honey — good girl — let me see —”

You already know what he wants. You open your mouth and stick your tongue out, keeping your lust-filled gaze on him.

“Fuck, you’re so perfect,” he praises, tapping his cock on your tongue. He moves to drag it along your cheek and you start to follow it, hungry for more. He chuckles deeply. “You like it that much, huh? Jesus.” 

He seems enamored with you, almost, like he can’t believe this is real life even though you’ve sucked him off plenty. You nod eagerly in response and smile with your eyes, your mouth still open and waiting for him. 

“Shit, alright. God, you’re so good, baby,” he says, pushing himself into you again. You keep your eyes on his, tears forming in the corners of yours as his cock hits the back of your throat. “So, so good. ‘Course I’m gonna give you whatever you want when you look at me like that. Shit, are those tears, sweetheart?”

You nod around his dick, and you’ve got about 30 seconds left in you before you’re gonna need some air. You can feel the first few tears running down your face, and you know all too well what it’s going to do to him.

“Fuckin’ crying ‘cause you love my cock so much? Jesus — fuck.”

You take a deep breath through your nose when he finally pulls back, because you know what’s coming. 

“I’m gonna wreck that pretty little throat of yours. Would you like that, princess?”

You nod. Fucking please.

He smirks, grabbing a fistful of your hair, and then he’s thrusting into your mouth with abandon. The room sounds like the audio to one of Eddie’s porn movies — the ones that Steve sneaks him sometimes — gagging and panting and a dirty fucking half-choke, half-gargle coming from you every time he hits the back of your throat. Your mascara’s running, and you feel like you’re on a different fucking planet when he fucks you like this. Spit’s dripping down your chin, onto your skirt, and your arousal is definitely creating a wet spot on the floor where you’re sat. 

“Jesus. Fucking. Christ.” He accentuates the Lord’s full name with three hard final thrusts, pulling out of you completely, grabbing you by your wrist and yanking you to your feet before you can even begin to process what’s happening. He bends you over the bed and flips up your skirt, dragging his cock through your folds once, twice, before entering you with ease. His hand is still in your hair, and he’s pulling your head up off the mattress as he resumes fucking you. 

You whine, turning your head to the side and opening your mouth, sticking your tongue out, because as good as he felt, you needed something in between your lips. 

“Oh, you’re gonna be the fuckin’ death of me. Fuck,” he pants, giving you what you want by placing two ringed fingers in your mouth.

You wrap your lips around them, sucking and humming contently, as he keeps thrusting into you hard and fast. 

“So fuckin’ greedy, baby. Need all your holes fuckin’ filled to shut you up, hm?” He takes his hand out of your hair and moves it down to your ass, his thumb dangerously close to your hole. “Is that what you want?” he continues. “Be fuckin’ plugged up?”

You nod frantically, managing a desperate, “mhm!” around his fingers. He slows down his thrusts for a few seconds, spitting onto your crack, dragging it down with his thumb and circling your hole. 

“Right there?” he teases, and you could start crying again with need. 

You manage something that sounds like a “please”, and it’s good enough for him. He resumes his brutal pace as he sticks his thumb in, and it’s just to the first knuckle, but it’s enough to send you into a near-delirious state. 

“Good girl,” Eddie praises, and you can hear the smirk in his voice. “So fuckin’ good at being so fuckin’ dirty.”

You let out a noise somewhere between a moan and a whine, and he sinks his thumb all the way in in response. 

“That what you wanted? Jesus, you drive me crazy with your fuckin’ whining. Shit,” he speeds up his thrusts. “I give you everything you want and you still fuckin’ whine, you notice that?”

“‘m sorry!” you manage to cry out, full on sobbing now as his cock hits your sweet spot with every thrust; moments away from your release. 

“No, it’s alright, princess. Just can’t get enough of me, can you?”

You shake your head, almost violently, accidentally ejecting his fingers from your mouth. 

“Please, please, please, please,” you chant through more sobs.

“Please what, baby? Tell me what you want,” he pants. His thrusts grow faster and sloppier, and you know he’s close, too. 

“Please, can I come!? Eddie, please, let me —”

“Oh, fuck. You can come, sweetheart —”

You’re pretty sure the scream you let out echoes through the whole trailer park as your orgasm hits you like a fucking tidal wave. 

“Fuck, oh my God — shit, you’re too perfect, I can fuckin’ feel you — ohhh, fuuuuck.”

You’re not even halfway through riding out your high before you feel Eddie filling you up, and you wish you could bottle up the sounds he’s making and keep them forever. 

He falls over you moments later, and you whimper at the loss of his thumb when he uses his forearms on either side of you to keep himself from crushing you completely, placing soft kisses to your nape and shoulder blades as you find your breathing again. He nuzzles into the crook of your neck, placing another kiss there before mumbling, “I mean it. You’re gonna be the death of me.” 

You giggle sleepily, slowly coming out of your daze. “Hey, it’s not the worst way to go.” 

He chuckles, and you feel his chest vibrate against your bare back. “Well,” he places a kiss on your temple, “can’t argue with that… You okay?” he asks, taking in your mascara-stained cheeks and the fucked-out look on your face.

“Mhm,” you reply dreamily. “Think I want ice cream. Throat’s sore… jaw’s sore.”

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart. You need to tell me if I’m being too —”

“I will, Eds,” you interrupt, before he can start feeling guilty, “But I like the ache, I promise.”

He huffs a quiet laugh, shaking his head before kissing your temple again. “You’re such a freak.”

You smile. “And you love it.”

He nods. “And I love it.”

[astrobydalia]

more observations (lost count)✨

Hello guys! Life's been crazy lately and I barely have time to make any of the master posts I wanted to, so you'll be getting lost of observation posts that I've been collecting in my drafts for the past months. As always, enjoy!

❗️long post

work by astrobydalia

✨ Sagittarius and Aquarius are so fucking similar. Both of them are chaotic af, love their freedom and think they're smarter than everyone else. People who have both of these in their big 6 have the most unhinged

✨ Libra is WAY more obsessed with perfection than Virgo

✨ Whenever I had Libra or Taurus ASC on my Solar return chart I was lazy AS FUCK. I had no motivation to work whatsoever during those years, all I wanted to do was vibe and enjoy life. I also felt very relaxed and stress-free, when difficulties came I just went with the flow

✨ What is up with Gemini risings and always feeling intellectually insecure all the time? Literally their #1 insecurity is feeling like they are dumb or like they’re not good enough for highly abstract and intellectual tasks/professions. They come across as someone immature who lacks wisdom or has a superficial/simplistic view of things. I feel like this is because they attract people who are a bit of know-it-alls (Sagittarius DSC) and they have a reputation for being scattered-brained (Pisces 10th house) so people tent to infantilize them a lot.

^^^But let me tell you this not true at all, Gemini risings are some of the most brilliant people I’ve met with so much potential. Their problem is that they allow overthinking to get the best of them and end up doubting themselves 24/7. These are the type of people who have amazing ideas but they never pursue any them. They really struggle making decisions for themselves, they always need to ask for opinions first which is not a bad thing but this makes them come across as incapable or as someone who lacks self-sufficiency

✨ Mercurial signs (Virgo and Gemini) like to focus on concrete things and immediate reality, they process life by connecting one thing at a time and taking info as it comes, they focus on what's going on around them cause Mercury is all about multiplicity and details. With Jupiter signs on the other hand (Sag and Pisces) one thing about them is they don't care about details as long as things make sense as a whole, they see life from a more broad and general perspective, they prefer having a birds eye view of things because Jupiter is all about expansion and therefore it likes to encompass many things at once. This is why Virgo and Gemini rule mundane life themes and immediate reality while Sag and Pisces are more about general life lessons and higher knowledge

✨ Scorpio moons/8th house moons are the definition of an energy vampire fr. They just have a really poor understanding of healthy emotional boundaries, they expect you to give your all but aren't willing to reciprocate and always turn everything into a manipulation or mind game somehow which makes it pretty exhausting to be around them in the long run. Don't get me wrong, most of the ones I’ve met were very and good people but they always end up taking my energy away and make me feel emotionally burnt out

✨ Mercury-Mars aspects have this "it is what it is" mentality and really dislike over complicating things by reading too deep into them. They tend to think things exactly as they seem. This does not mean they're simplistic, on the contrary this makes them surprisingly insightful fast thinkers and are not the type to be easily fooled

✨ I've seen people saying that hard aspects between Mercury-Pluto makes people misunderstand your words. This is not true, this happens with Neptune cause Neptune rules delusion, but Pluto is a very blunt and straightforward planet cause it's all about revealing the dark truths. Mercury-Pluto aspects makes someone very deliberate with their words and they know exactly what to say to make their message stick. You will understand their words exactly how they want you to understand them. What happens with hard aspects is that the native tends to have a more provocative approach in the things they say, they don't care if you're offended by what they say as long as what they say makes an impact. People can misunderstand their intentions because of this, but not their words

✨ The ironic thing about Aquarius placements is that they are very good when it comes to connecting with the masses, the public usually feels very drawn to them because they're very good at appealing to collective values which makes them come across as relatable to many people as a result. However, when you actually try to relate to them or connect one-on-one, you will find yourself with someone that is surprisingly elusive, distant and more distrustful than Scorpio placements which is a huge contrast from the welcoming vibe they give off to the public. I've found that the only way you will get close to an Aquarius placements is on THEIR terms lmao, if they've decided they like you, it'll be them who will approach you and/or make the effort to engage with you

✨ A reocurring thing I've seen with Virgo placements is that they really dislike big changes and prefer to stay in control. I think this is not mentioned often cause it's kinda weird to say that about a mutable sign, but Virgos being mercury+earth ruled they feel comfortable relying on facts, data, observations, etc and they use all this tangible info to navigate reality, that's why they rule daily life and routines because they invest a lot of their energy on factually understanding and categorizing their reality (earth signs in general are very attached to the tangible). Their mutable nature shows in that they easily use their knowledge to adapt, find solutions and fix what’s wrong but when they are in situations where these "categories" prove to be useless (aka Pisces themes), they get very triggered cause that means they no longer have control of their reality

✨ That being said another reoccurring thing I’ve noticed with Virgo placements is that they love to predict things. But not in a mystical sense it’s more like they enjoy understanding things in such way that they’re able to easily put a label on them and easily predict what’s going on or how something works

✨ I have not seen a single Taurus placement who didn’t have the most insanely sexy and pleasant voice ever. Doesn’t matter if they sing of not, just hearing their voice is so delightful

✨ Aquarius Mercury really believe their opinions are the most ultimate and correct opinions out there. They are certain that their judgment is always 100% objective (aka always true) so in their mind if you slightly disagree with them that means you’re mediocre, dumb or narrow-minded.

✨ There's always a duality in all mutable signs. Sagittarius can be very humorous and optimistic but also very dark and profound. Gemini can be curious and chaotic but also very analytical and logical. Virgo can be picky and perfectionistic but also very permissive and conformist. Pisces can be very compassionate and wise but also very detached and clueless

✨ Neptune does not do well in air houses/signs at all simply because air energy rules (different types of) information and connections, while Neptune is all delusion and confusion. Also air energy is purely cerebral and rational while Neptune appeals to the unconscious

✨ I have not fact-checked this but I feel like it's safe to say that Mars rules testosterone. Testosterone is a hormone associated to violence or impulsive behavior, sex drive, red blood cells (blood), masculinity, etc That's literally all mars

✨ People always talk about how Capricorn moons have had a rough life but I've noticed this is also very true for Sagittarius Moons?? Responsibilities are not imposed on them like Capricorn, in their case they have to build up wisdom about life through pure and raw experience without anyone giving them a heads up or any pointers first, that's why they grow up feeling like they're fully on their own. Things work out for them at the end but they always have most MESSY life experience it's really crazy

✨ Both domicile and afflicted Mars are ambitious and determined but the main difference is that Libra/Taurus/Cancer Mars need to find some type of enjoyment or fulfillment in their goals in order to get motivated while Capricorn/Aries/Scorpio Mars find motivation in the challenge and endure through stuff they don't find pleasant

✨ From what I've seen males with Scorpio placements are very superficial and will gaslight as a lifestyle. They are the type of people who look the other way or brush things off or never takes anything seriously and I've noticed they do this so they never have to take accountability.

✨ Neptune/Pisces energy either gives “glamorous and ethereal” vibes or “weird in an extremely cringe way” vibes, there’s no in-between

✨ A reoccurring thing I've noticed with those who have Chiron in Taurus/2nd house or Chiron-Venus is that they often have dubious morality or double standards because they don't have a solid values

✨ Every single Libra Moon/rising female I’ve met embodied the material girl stereotype. They really have this “instagram girl” vibes to them if that makes sense

✨ Those with Sagittarius in the 5th house can actually find a lot of joy and happiness in becoming parents or they have a lot of fun with children

✨ Scorpio Mars can't stand not knowing what's going on around them and at first I thought this was bc they were suspicious/paranoid but then I realized it’s because they’re just controlling as shit. They come across as very chill and care fee but they’re actually SUPER controlling dude. Even when they know for sure that they can trust you and you’re doing nothing wrong they still want to keep taps on you and won’t leave you alone. They won't bluntly violate your privacy but will still find ways to always know what you're up to

✨ The resentful and spiteful stereotype associated to Scorpio actually belongs to Leo placements imo. They can be very reactive and childish when you insult their ego and will make it very known that they won't let it go

✨ Cancer North Node people always have some sort of issue or inner conflict with of having kids. They feel drawn to the idea of becoming a parent but deep down they low-key don't? I've also seen many women with this placement who had fertility issues

I have the theory that these natives are conflicted in this topic because they see family as an achievement or a societal expectation (Capricorn south node) so in this life time they have to know what it's like to desire a family for the right reasons and not because they feel like they 'should'

✨ Capricorn risings really are hyper-aware of their public image and how others perceive them. That's why they always end up becoming very popular and respected, cause they know very well where they "stand" publicly so they know how to successfully curate their own reputation. It's not surprising to see this placement a lot in celebrities

✨ Pluto in the 12th house are genuinely unsure of who they can trust which leads to a lot of paranoia and projection. The type to ignore the most obvious red flags but then automatically doubt your loyalty cus you spoke in a suspicious tone

✨ Pisces/12th house placements 🤝 disappearing. Y’all shit on Gemini for ghosting but have you ever met a pisces/12th houser?

✨ Saturn in 5th house people had parents (namely father) who were overly critical of them and their self-expression. Doesn’t necessarily mean they were unsupportive of the native but they were quite hard on the native’s creativity

✨ I've seen a lot of bullies/mean girls have Aquarius placements. Honorable mentions: virgo, Leo, libra

✨ Neptune-ASC people are really good at making themselves invisible when they want and/or making parts of themselves go completely unnoticed even if they're bluntly obvious. I've noticed they actually get away with a lot cause they have this tendency to not be accurately seen by others if that makes sense

✨ Neurodivergent individuals usually have Mercury harshly aspecting (conjunction, square, opposition and inconjuction) Uranus and Saturn. Said Mercury is more often than not in a water house/sign/degree or in Aries. Of course not everyone with these aspects will be neurodivergent, but it's just a pattern I've seen

✨ Pluto-ASC people most of the times fail to have a lighthearted view towards life. They always want to look beyond the surface of things which doesn't really allow them to enjoy life as it is. They often get a reputation for looking too deep into everything and in turn the Pluto-asc native often sees others as superficial

✨ Virgo risings are huge conformist and won’t go after anything that’s outside their immediate boundaries. They only make an effort towards things that are accessible and will quickly lose interest in anything that has difficult availability or requires them to go way out of their comfort zone. They're overall pretty self-serving.

✨ I know several people diagnosed with OCD. All of them have Virgo AND 6th house placements, 22º in their big 3, Scorpio Mercury/Moon and Mercury dominance

work by astrobydalia

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[idesofrevolution]

Father

Dad had been acting strange for quite some time. Honestly, it wasn't that noticeable in the beginning, which I suppose made it difficult to pinpoint when things started to change. I only started to notice maybe seven months or so ago after he turned down the daily Budweiser. Patrick O'Shaughnessy turning down his biggest vice? I knew something was off right then and there as he sat there, smiling at me from his armchair with the game on in the background: red flag number two, my stepfather had NEVER been a sports guy. Binging Fox News while fingering pudding cups, sure; but actually knowing what was happening in a football game?

I'd originally thought he'd perhaps found a side girl to cheat on my mom with. It was far from outside of his character to do something like that, if he'd ever be able to get his nasty ass out of the recliner for ten fucking minutes... He'd gotten too comfortable in his laziness. When my mom married him a year ago, he was already a piece of shit lardass who refused to do a single thing around the house, refused to work a normal job (he was waiting for a management position apparently), and above all refused to acknowledge me whatsoever. He was rude, crass, could never even so much as break a smile at me. And there, in that moment as his eyes made contact with mine and his lips curled into a smile, I knew something was wrong.

"What, no beer burps for me today?" I scowled at him, raising my eyebrow in a malicious curiosity.

"Nahh little man, I'm trying to cut down." Little man? He'd never gotten my name right let alone given me a nickname... We did not have that kind of relationship, at least one that would have an affectionate nickname for one another. "Say, I'm hittin' the gym in a couple minutes. Whaddya say you come along?"

"You're... you're going to the gym? Really?" I sat there slackjawed. Something was indeed off. What it was, I couldn't exactly tell. Nothing outside of his UberEats order would ever get Patrick out of the chair. He laughed at me, gripping his sizeable paunch beneath his stained tee shirt.

"You bet, bud. High time I set an example for my boy. How's he gonna respect a couch potato loser? You should come along. Nothin' like a father and son spending time together, especially in the gym. Get the boys lookin', right?" He stood up from his chair, grabbing his keys off the kitchen countertop as he headed toward his car. I, on the other hand, stood there with tunnel vision. Patrick was not the most supportive parent when it came to... well, anything. But the biggest bone of contention was me coming out to them last year. It was the biggest hullabaloo, Oscar worthy. Thrown glasses, flipped chairs, disownment, threats of eviction... the only thing that kept me in the house was my mother putting her foot down. It wasn't a big deal for her, but for him... I was the biggest embarrassment on the planet. What would Tucker Carlson think?

Yet as I stood there, staring at the cigarette-stained wall, my brain couldn't process what I'd just heard. 'Get the boys lookin' he said... As if he were trying to play wing man for me... What the fuck was happening? My heart fluttered the moment his words sank in, that was pride. It was something neither my father nor my stepdad ever had the courtesy of giving me. My walls were up, and I was beyond skeptical, so for my own peace of mind I had decided then and there to investigate.

From that day on, the moment I came home from school, I was spying. While most of my friends were trying to enjoy their senior year, going to parties or getting ready for college, I was at home peering behind corners at my stepfather. Over the first few months I watched with complete disbelief at the changes. Every single day, I'd come home, and he'd be on his way out to the gym. The normal scowl he'd gift me upon my entry was replaced with jovial smiles and hair ruffling as he schlepped his gym bag over his shoulder out the door. He'd be gone for two or three hours at least, and come home just before dinner dripping in buckets of sweat. I'd begun to avoid driving his car, as the stink of his sweat had completely inundated the fabric of the seats. He'd toss his bag on the floor by my book bag (gross), and plop down at the dinner table where he would ask genuinely about my day or sweetly flirt with my mom while winking at me. I still wasn't convinced. He kept asking me nearly every day if I'd come to the gym with him, if we could go shoot hoops at the park across the street, or if I'd play FIFA with him. Each time I'd shoot him down, he'd have a momentary break in that happy facade of his, as if it were hurting him I wasn't spending time with him.

Within five months or so, he was nearly unrecognizable. I guess protein shakes & a low carb diet really works on a guy: he'd lost nearly 70 pounds and gained about 20 in muscle alone. He'd struck up friendships with my school's wrestling coach and a couple of the neighbors, and we were finding ourselves invited to barbecues and block parties for the first time. I had to endure little hallway chats with Coach Weston about joining the wrestling team, as he was in talks with the school district about bringing my stepdad on as assistant coach. It was bizarre to me for many reasons, but one stood out above all: Patrick was never a wrestler. Not in college, not in high school, my mom even confirmed it one night at dinner. He'd brush it off as if it were something fun he were doing with 'Dane', which in and of itself was weird to hear the coach's first name used at all at home.

Sleep was getting difficult. My mind ran at a thousand miles an hour, but now he and mom had begun to fuck like rabbits. Loud, hard sex almost every other night with their bed slamming against my bedroom wall for hours. Mom of course was radiant at that point. The years of one piece of shit husband being a complete and total asshole, replaced by another piece of shit husband treating her like garbage melted away in the course of a couple of months of Patrick being a strangely brilliant partner. He'd started to cook us meals, he'd started to do the yardwork, he'd even fixed things around the house that had been broken for years. Sure, the sex seemed to help, but as she would say: "He's lessened my load so much, Jonas. I wish you'd give him a chance."

Sure, he was treating my mom well and that was a good enough reason for me to like him. Was it enough to trust him? No. I'd still turn down every single request to spend time alone with him. No gym. No basketball court. No gaming. Though, in one single concession for my mom's sake, I begrudgingly agreed to let him drive me to school in the morning. That one decision is what truly changed my life forever. I went to bed that night, putting on my earbuds to drown out their disgusting sex in the next room, less than eager for the fifteen minute drive the next day.

Thus, on that warm April day, my morning began as normal. Shower, dress, drink my morning smoothie, grab my bag, and walk out the door. It wasn't long before I was greeted by his chipper, dim witted voice shattering my peaceful morning.

"Ayy little man!" I sighed, turning toward the garage, where there he stood: shirtless and dripping sweat from his chiseled body. As a gay guy, I have to admit, it was hard not to stare. He had become quite a sight to behold. The other moms in the neighborhood certainly would sit and stare at him on his morning runs, even a couple of the dads as well, and now I sat there oogling the ripped, gleaming body he'd built.

"Hey, Patrick. Do you need to shower? I have to get going, but I can catch the bus if there's not enough time?" In my head, I was praying to God that he'd just hop in the shower he never seemed to take and I could go on my merry way. Though, no such luck.

"Nah, man! It's all good. I promised you I'd take you to school, so hop in the car!" I sighed, turning to his 1998 Mustang with a shiver cascading down my spine.

"Sure, Patrick." I dragged my feet headed toward his car. Opening the door, the humid, musky air within poured out of the car, punching me in the face with his scent. Imagine a noxious waft of butter, blue cheese, saltwater, and feet just drowning you. That was the stink that swamped his car, and him for that matter. I took one final breath of fresh air before I sat in the car and closed the door. He wasn't far behind, not even bothering to put a shirt on as he hopped in beside me.

"Alright! Let's get goin' bud!" He turned the key and the car roared to life. I sighed, thankful it was only fifteen minutes. As we pulled out of the driveway and onto the street, I turned on the radio, hoping to dissuade him from making some puerile small talk. We sat there in silence for a moment, before hitting the main road. "You know what, bud?" He turned to me, looking me up and down before rolling up the windows and turning off the radio. "Ahhh fuck it. We're playing hooky today."

"Wait, what?" I had no time to protest, before he turned onto the main road, but in the opposite direction from the school. "Patrick, I'm not playing hooky. I have to go to school." He laughed, ruffling my hair yet again.

"You gotta stop callin' me Patrick, Jonas. I don't have to be dad if you don't want, but Patrick is so... not me. Just call me Pat."

"Okay, PAT. I'm going to school." He turned to me, and his smile faded, letting out a solid sigh that would put mine to shame. He pulled over onto the shoulder, and put the car in park.

"Listen. I know you don't like me. I know you don't trust me, and I get it. I made a lot of changes to him very quickly, and it's hard to keep up." Him? Why did he say it like that? "I'd been watching you just suffer endlessly for years, man. All the time. I just wanted you to have a good role model for once. A man you could lean on, and not some shitty lard who talks bad to ya."

"What the fuck are you on about?" My patience had worn too thin for my calm veneer to bear. He turned the key, and the engine quickly died.

"C'mon bro. You know something's different about him, right? I know you've been watchin' me like a hawk. Think I haven't noticed you watchin' me from around the hall corner? You think I don't know you're creepin' while I beat one out huffin' my strap? I know, dude. I've always known. C'mon, man." Pat threw his hands in the air in frustration, the first time since his attitude adjustment that I'd seen anything like it. But, this was different. It wasn't rage, it was exasperation.

"Okay, Pat. So you saw me watching you. Can you please tell me what the fuck is going on now?" He slowly rested his sweaty head against the headrest, and sighed. Then, a chuckle. Then another, until he was full on laughing. "What!?"

"Ahhh, man. I never thought I'd see the day you'd man up and come to. Yeah, Jonas. I can tell you what the fuck is going on." I sat back, confounded- even more so than before. "My name was Matt Wilde. Way back in the day, I used to wrestle for Palm Heights High. Was pretty damn good at it too, but one day I got pinned just a little too hard and poof."

"Matt Laurent? What the fuck are you talking about, Pat? Are you high?" His dumb laugh threw him back in the seat.

"Nah, I finished that joint earlier, man. Stone sober now. But, safe to say for the past 50 years I've been just hoppin' body to body. Started with a couple of my teammates just so I could finish out the years, wrestle a bit more. Got bored, hung around the gym, in and out of some lug heads. Did a stint in some Libertines, that was fun as fuck. But man, I saw you sulkin' around the school for the past three years and thought, damn that kid looks sad. So, I may have eavesdropped a bit, maybe caught a bit about your dead beat, piece of shit dad; then right after he ditches, Mom lands this fuckin' winner." He slapped his chest, little droplets of his sweat landing on my bewildered face. "Oh shit, my bad." I sat there, slackjawed, completely disoriented as he dumbly wiped his sweat off my nose and cheek.

"You... you're dead?" He snapped his fingers, winking and smirking at me.

"Bingo, bud. Right on the money. I was like, I'm in a very unique situation here to fuckin' do something this. So, I slipped into this dumbass and just stuck around. Did the work. Tried, emphasis on TRIED, to be like the Dad I had and that you deserve, ya know? Haven't made it fuckin' easy, but... ahhh. That's parenthood, am I right?" I scoffed, he must have taken some damn good drugs. I was convinced. There was no way!

"Okay, then. MATT. So, if you're some dead jock bro possessing Pat, where the fuck is he?" He pondered for a moment in silence, shrugging his shoulders.

"I think he's gone, bro. I haven't stayed in a dude this long, I used to hear him bitchin' and moanin' all the time, but he went silent a couple of weeks ago." Fuck, I wish that were true. I had to admit, even if only in my mind, this Matt-Patrick was lightyears better than Patrick Patrick. Sure, he was dumb, he was every stereotype dudebro in the book, he smelled like he bathed in sweat baths... But, for the first time in my life, he wanted to be around me. He wanted to spend time with me. He made an effort. He... liked me. The mental gymnastics needed to make sense of the situation was growing too monumental to comprehend, but in that moment as he sat there with his dumb fucking grin on his face as if I was going to just completely buy it, I started to hope it was true.

"So, what now, Matt? Are you just gonna keep fucking my mom and prentending to be my Dad for the rest of your life? Or are you gonna hop out and ditch us?" He raised his eyebrow in genuine confusion.

"I mean, yeah that was the plan. One, your mom is fuckin' hot and she's better than any girl I've ever been with. Two, I kinda like our little family. Three, I ain't ditchin' ya, bro. You had enough of that shit for one lifetime. Besides, I gotta get you to chill the fuck out one way or another, so I was hoping we could give it a shot. Like I've been beggin' man." 'Matt' put his hands together as if praying, pleading to me. I suppose it wouldn't be the worst thing. It's better than coming home every day to spy on him, and it's way better than being the sad wallflower all the fucking time. Besides, those dumb fucking puppy dog eyes...

"You know what? Sure, Matt. What did you have in mind?" I could barely finish my sentence before he'd twisted the key and slammed on the gas. The man drove like a bat out of hell through town, hooting and hollering in victory as if he'd won a match.

"Hell fuckin' yeah, man! Dude we're gonna be so tight, it's gonna be awesome. You're gonna be so fuckin' sexy, the dudes are gonna be on their knees by the time we're done! Slobberin' on that dick like SLURPEDY SLURP! WOO!" So fuckin' dumb. Dumb as a box of rocks. But I couldn't help but crack a smile as he swerved left and right, shouting at the top of his lungs. "Let's get you sweatin' man. We can get you pumpin' iron, playin' ball... I'm burning everything you got in your closet, bro. Nobody wants polos and button ups, man. Gettin' you some J's, some good jocks. Oh, how do you feel about chains?"

"Matt, dude. I'm not like you. That's all well and good for you, but I can't pull that shit off..." He slammed on the brakes and a cavalcade of horns from behind us rang out like a brass band. Matt whipped his gaze to me in shock.

"Don't say that, bro! You could be a bona fide stud! Look at you, man!" A couple of hard slaps against my bony chest and a harsh wheeze later, perhaps it sank in a bit. "Aight, well we have some work to do. I mean, if you're up for it." He smirked at me, lifting up those massive arms and flexing. His veins bulged from his massive bicep, the wet hairs in his ripe pits wafted that pungent scent I'd regrettably started to secretly love... Yeah, maybe I did want it.

"I don't know how, man. If I were like you, I bet I could." As if a cartoon lightbulb flickered to life above his head, I saw the spark of inspiration hit him like a sack of bricks. That stupid smirk grew into a wide, toothy grin.

"Aight, bro. Haven't tried this before, but I'll give it a go." He clapped his hands together, rubbing them gently. "I saw Jimmy Morales do this once when he needed a spotter. Gotta ask, though. You trust me, right?" I sat there and wondered if I did. I'd pretended up until this point that I believed every word that had come out of his mouth. This insane, psychotic story. It was nuts. It was crazy. But that little voice in the back of my head, deep down in the dark recesses of my brain decided to finally speak up.

"Yeah, Matt. I trust you."

"ALRIGHT! Fuck yeah, man. Oh shit, this is gonna be great! Okay, so don't freak out, just trust me and let it happen, okay? It doesn't hurt, the dudes usually bust a nut after it's all over." I heard a squelching rumble from in his stomach: wet, guttural, as if he were getting ready to vomit. Which became more and more likely as I saw a lump start to make it's way up his throat.

"Matt..." His body began to shudder and quake, his veins bulging and head thrashing from side to side. Then, from between his lips, a glowing blue vapor began to slip out. It was tiny at first, a little tail whipping about, before more and more of it started to bellow out of his mouth. Slick, bulbous, translucent. I had mere seconds of watching it slither out before it darted right into my own slack jaw. It squirmed as it wriggled from his body into mine, slurping deep into my bulging stomach. The feeling of fullness overtook me, watching more and more of the rubbery thing enter me, squeezing into every available inch within me, and he was right: it felt good. It felt like an eternity, but in reality it was just moments. The last of suctioned into me, and the world went black.

---

I woke the next morning in my bed. Shooting straight upright in a puddle of sweat. I rubbed my hands on my face, running my fingers through my drenched hair. What a fuckin' dream. I groaned as doubled over in pain. I felt like I was hit by a train. Everything hurt, a soreness unlike anything I'd ever experienced before radiated from every fiber of my being. Then, a soft caress of the nostril. Salty, buttery, funky... I raised my arm, finding the culprit immediately.

"Fuck!" I spat out, before taking a deep breath, another hit. "Fuuuuck..." Another inhale, a familiar stink, a comforting stink. What started as gentle whiffs quickly turned into full on huffing. I buried my nose in my pit, letting the wet jungle lather my face in my own sweat.

"Morning, bro. Good shit, ain't it?" The words echoed in my head, a soft, rippling little voice from within my brain. I should have been alarmed, terrified, even. But no, the words felt like gospel to me. "We really went to town yesterday, man. I had you liftin' like an Olympian. Take it easy. Here, I'll be right there, I got just the thing for it!" My hands started to drift southward, beneath the waistband of the teal sweats I didn't own... Were they... Pats? The door to my room burst open mid-huff, and in walked the hulking tower himself with a tray in hand.

"Goooood Morning, Kiddo! I made ya a protein shake, good recovery breakfast after a workout sesh like we had! Oh, your Mom made eggs!" He walked over to the side of my bed, kicking the Jordans I'd borrowed from him to the side. Wait, when did I do that? "Eat up, champ. Those 'ceps aren't gonna feed themselves!" Slamming the tray down onto my thighs, I let out a groan of pain.

"Pat? Dude, I had the weirdest dream." Dude? I never say dude. I cupped my hand, slick with sweat and pre over my mouth, aghast at the words coming out of my mouth. Pat smiled, grabbing the shake and handing it to me. "Drink up, my dude. For real, you're gonna be in a world of hurt otherwise." The voice boomed in my head, HIS voice. But his lips hadn't moved an inch. "Pat..." I ripped the sheets off of me, sure enough, I was sporting his nasty sweatpants & drenched socks. Cupping my manhood was most definitely his grimy jockstrap. "Hey, if we were gonna have the best workout, I had to be comfortable, bro! I knew you'd get it, though." I looked at him, a tight lipped smile, as if he were proving to me he weren't talking to me. "Feels good, right! I told ya! Just think, bro. With a half of me in there, you're gonna be unstoppable." I smiled. A genuine fuckin' smile, for the first time in as long as I could remember. I watched as my hand gripped the shake, bringing it to my lips of it's own accord. Downing the vanilla shake, our eyes met, and I understood completely. Matt winked at me, ruffling my hair, and sauntered back out of the door.

I leaned back in my bed, throwing my arm behind my head. The musk drifting from my pits and feet, identical to my dad's. Smirking, I let my fingers drift down to my growing meat in its slimy pouch, knowing fully well that I was in damn fine hands.

---

So that brings us to today, I guess! One year to the day. One full year since I finally let Dad in. 'Pat' sure did join the wrestling team as assistant coach, bringing his son in tow, eager to finish my senior year with at least a title. Thanks to him, I made varsity after the first fuckin' tryout. Can't say it was all me, all the time, but after a while it was. Honestly, it all started to blend together. Me at the wheel, him at the wheel, soon it sort of blurred and it was just me. That last semester was the best of my whole fucking life. Parties, bodybuilding, skating with the boys, fuckin' the boys... Shit, it was the time of my fuckin' life.

And after every day at school, or at least after every post-practice locker room blow job, I couldn't wait to get home and smash some Call of Duty with the old man. Mom would always come in, making comments on how we seemed as if I'd become a mini-Pat. Finishing eachother's sentences, drinking the same beer, wearing the same kind of clothes... she'd always put our sneaks outside the garage door, "they even stank the same." Little did she know just how much of the same person we really were.

I've decided to stick around the house for a year or so before maybe headed to college. I don't know, family is here, friends are here, Coach Weston should be retiring in a year or two... so there should be an opening for a new assistant coach on the wrestling team. Besides, I may have landed quite the catch in the boyfriend department, and I really want him to meet my dad, I have a feeling they'll get along just fine.

[monzabee]

the lusty month of may – cs55 (+18)

masterlist

Summary: The one where it’s that darling month when everyone throws self-control away, and you and Carlos decide to do a wretched thing – or two. 

Pairing: carlos sainz x reader

Word Count: 1.4k

Warnings: smut, unprotected sex (cover your willy, don’t be silly), pre-established relationship, cursing, google translate spanish bc i forgot all the spanish i learned in school (lo siento mucho, señora xenia), talks about pregnancy, minors dni!!

Author’s Note: hi, hey, hello!! okay so this was not supposed to take me this long to write, but i kind of procrastinated because of studying and my exams, but here it is, finally done! i fully blame carlos for my brain rot, so i hope you guys enjoy this one, and feedback is always appreciated! (p.s. the title comes from a song from the broadway musical ‘camelot’ for those of you who are interested!) good morning, noon or night wherever you are, xoxobee

Please also note that all of my works are protected under copyright, and not available for reposting on other platforms. 

His hand is closed over your mouth in a feasible attempt to cover up any pleas or sounds coming from your lips. You tried telling him no when he started pulling you towards the greenhouse behind the villa his family rented out for the weekend. It was supposed to help Carlos destress before leaving for Miami for the rest of the triple header, a long weekend, “A quick little getaway,” his mother called it. Carlos lets out some built-up steam, alright, by fucking you every chance he gets over the course of the 4-day vacation. 

“You know what it does to me when you wear this dress, amorita,” Carlos’ breath hits your sweaty skin as he runs his nose down the length of your throat, “maybe I should rip it when I’m done with you, hm? De esa manera no puedes tentarme más.” That way you can't tease me anymore. You try shaking your head as a response which elicits a mocking chuckle from him, the way he bucks his hip driving him further deep inside you. The strangled moan that rips from the back of your throat has you throwing your head back, which causes Carlos to quickly, but gently, tug on your chin to make you look back up at him. “Eyes on me, cariño.” 

His hips continue their rushed movements as he keeps his eyes locked to yours, your lips opening in an attempt to make him see reason. “Carlos, they’ll hear us.” You think he’ll ignore you once again, like he did when he was frantically pulling you away from the pathway which leads to the courtyard both of you were supposed to be making your way over for dinner with his parents. 

With one last thrust of his lips, which pulls yet another moan from your lips. “I won’t let anyone see you like this; you know that don’t you?” His tone is sweet despite the way he’s breathing deeply in an attempt to organise his breathing, the way he uses the tip of his pointer finger to caress down your blushed cheek, sending shivers down your spine. Although you manage to nod your head, there is a small smile on his lips as he reminds you, “Words, amorita.”

“I- I know that,” you breathe out a ragged breath, hand gripping Carlos’ shirt tighter in the process, “you’re far too jealous to let anyone see.” 

“Always such wits, amor,” he drags the tip of his finger towards your lips, “maybe I’ll just have to fuck you harder to remind you how much you love my possessive side.” 

“You are insane,” you pant, letting out another moan when he shifts his hips to continue his movements even deeper, “is that why you pulled me here? To fuck me into the wall because you were jealous?” 

His voice is hoarse against your skin as he drags his hand down your face to your neck towards your chest to grope your breast. “I made you a promise, remember?” 

And you do. You remember the hushes whispers and promises shared before the New Year’s, and the sweet kiss you’ve shared afterwards. Your eyes soften as realisation sinks in, his determined gaze on yours suddenly making more sense. His hand is rough as he kneads the skin of your breast, his fingers quickly find your pebbled nipple, which has you whining. “I do- I do remember.” You manage to get out as you do your best to focus on his command from earlier. 

“Good, so be a good girl for me and hang on tight, hm?” He gives you enough time for you to organise yourself; your hands grab the flower arranging table underneath you firmly and it makes you receive a pleased hum from him as he keeps up the movement of his hips whilst also making you wrap your legs around him, a hand firmly placed on your upper thigh. “Eyes on me, cariño.” He reminds you.

You comply, of course, and his thrusts keep getting deeper and deeper every time his hips finds yours because of the new position. There is nothing innocent about the way the sounds of your skin slapping off of each other echo in the stuffy greenhouse, mixed with your moans calling out his name over and over again. He knows you well enough to know your tells when you’re getting closer, and he knows your body well enough to know that you won’t be able to hang on for too long. 

The way you scream out Carlos’ name when you feel his fingers drawing circles on your clit is nothing short of animalistic, the way he whispers praises to your lips is lost to you as you feel yourself getting closer to your release. “Carlos,” his name leaves your mouth in a desperate moan, followed by a softer and more pleading, “Carlos, please.” 

“Ask me nicely, amor.” His smile is almost devilish as he mumbles the words to your lips, his fingers slowing down their movements until you give him what he wants. His free hand tighten around your upper thigh in warning as he adds, “No continuaré si no lo pides amablemente.” I won't continue if you don't ask nicely.

You bite back a snarky comment, hyperaware of the fact that he is a man of his word and will leave you unsatisfied on the table by yourself if you don’t give him what he wants. “Por favor déjame correrme.” Please let me cum. The next moan that comes out of your lips come off more as a broken sob as he resumes his fingers’ movement on your bundle of nerves and his hips speeding up their movements to get you there, and you can’t help but chant “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.”

The continuous moans that keep coming out of your mouth, in which you are begging him to make you cum causes his hips to continue their movement rather sharply. Your eyes are filled with tears of pleasure as your visions gets blurry, but you make a point to maintain eye contact with Carlos while he guides you through your orgasm. He only lets himself come undone once you’re done, but unintentionally clench around him due to still feeling sensitive. Hearing your name come through his lips in a guttural moan causes you attempt to bring him closer by tightening your legs around him. 

After a few moments of calmness, you whine at the loss of contact as Carlos pulls out slowly, careful enough to not hurt you. Just as he begins tucking himself back to his pants you attempt to fix your own clothing, but he’s quick to stop you as he says, “Stay on the table, cariño.” 

You choose to nod, not trusting your voice. He’s gentle with you as he pulls up your underwear up your legs and fixes the top and the skirt of your dress. You watch him with sleepy eyes as you ask, “Do you think it took this time?”

“We’ll have to wait and see,” he smiles softly at you while getting some of your tangled hair out of your face, “do you think it did?”

“I don’t know,” you mumble, suddenly shy in front of him for no reason – but he is quick to divert the situation by cutting your feet off the ground by carrying you bridal style, which has you squealing as you wrap your arms around his neck, “Carlos!”

 He lets out a laugh a laugh as he walks out of the greenhouse and the colder air outside has you snuggling closer to his body for heat. His voice is light as he mumbles, “Well, this brings back memories.” 

“You say as if our wedding was a decade ago.” You complain, scrunching up your nose in disagreement. You let a confused hum when he starts walking back to the villa. “We’re supposed to–”

“I’ll tell my parents you were feeling ill,” he raises an eyebrow, “unless you want to sit with them for the rest of the night with my cum still–”

“Carlos!” You exclaim, making him quickly drop the rest of the sentence as he stars laughing. “This is not funny, you know.” 

“Oh it is plenty funny, cariño.” Carlos objects, “We can always tell my parents we were trying for a baby.” He is quick to add, “Not, the literal way, loca,” after receiving a bewildered look from you. 

You sigh as you shrug, “I mean, we could.” 

He agrees with a hum, “We’ll talk about it later, now go to sleep, I know you will before I make it back to the room anyway.”

“Mhm, you know me too well.” You mumble as you bury your face into his neck. 

“That I do, cariño.” He mumbles as he presses a gentle kiss to your hair “That I do.”