#when university told me that we should try to stay in contact with people in cults because it's much harder to get out without
Family is clearly just prolonging my and my mother's misery by forcing me to text her on special occasions and send her gifts, which is giving her false hope that her only boxing bag might come back and endure whatever she decides to take out on it again.
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part 0.8. IF YOU'RE WILLING TO LISTEN
"home and i know,
it's always different.
i'm the one in love."
from genesis by grimes, left at osaka university, osaka
she’s slipping her phone into her pocket right as she sees them approaching. she smiles, waving excitedly towards both of them. omi is a few strides behind him but she sees them both return the gesture.
“sorry we’re late,” suna says as they both approach, paper bags in hand. “we got held up buying you these.”
her breath catches in her throat when he pulls out a bundle of tulips wrapped in parchment paper from the bag and she gives him a hug in thanks, trying not to linger or overthink the contact. “don’t worry about it at all, we just opened like eight minutes ago so you guys aren’t late, and this totally makes up for it anyway. thank you so much, suna– rin.”
he smiles when she corrects herself. omi steps forward and reveals his own bouquet which she receives with thanks and hugs him as well, “congratulations. it looks like everything turned out well. how do you feel about it?”
there had been some portfolios she’d slaved over and still not been happy with the end result no matter what anyone told her, and he had been there in high school, staying awake late into the night, listening to her rant about it. “i like this one. a lot,” she answered truthfully. “and i hope you do, too. thank you for asking and coming tonight, omi! you’ve been my number one supporter since high school.”
she can see his smile through his mask and smiles just as wide when he ruffled her hair. “thank you for letting me support you. i’m glad i’ve been here since day one. you deserve this–all of this. remember me when you get famous.”
she laughs at his words, repositioning the flowers in her arms, “i should be saying that to you! you’re the upcoming professional volleyball player here.” he only scoffs at her, trying to keep humble but there’s no denying it. “i’m gonna put these flowers somewhere safe. in the meantime, you guys can wander around if you want. everything’s on the wall and kenma and akaashi’s exhibits are to the left if you want to check them out as well!”
omi nods and walks off and suna gives her another look before following after him. she's giving them time to look at her art before she comes back. she wants them to interpret the photos themselves, without anyone looking over their shoulders, telling them how to feel.
but this is suna’s first exhibit, and she can’t blame him for looking a little lost. all of her shows last year had lined up with days he had games and he’d been unable to come to any of them. he had always apologized for it but it never bothered her. if anything, she felt a little nervous now, letting him see such a raw side of her through her photos.
but at the same time, she didn’t really mind when it came to him. they had had intimate conversations before; he had even spent the end of last year with her when she was all alone at her apartment. he had assured her that he wouldn’t think any differently of her no matter what he saw, and she hoped that was true. she hoped that even if he saw the worst parts of her, he would still stick around.
she placed the flowers by her bag at a table she was sharing with akaashi and kenma. they had all dumped their things there to claim it as their own and had relaxed there for a little bit before the gallery had opened. akaashi was there now as well, screwing off the lid of a bottle.
“how’s it going?” she asked, making sure the flowers were stable and wouldn’t fall off the table.
“good,” he responded simply. “more people than i expected showed up, to be honest. but they seem to be liking everything a lot. is it going well for you?”
“of course they like everything! anyone who says they don’t like your work is lying,” she laughed and looked up at him. he only smiled and shook his head in response. “it’s been good for me, too. suna and omi just got here so they’ll probably come visit you soon.”
“good to know. i’m sure i’ll see sakusa, but not so much suna,” akaashi says, putting down his bottle.
“what’s that supposed to mean?” she raises her brows, unsure of what to make of his statement.
“he only came for you, i’d be surprised if he even left your side tonight,” he answers with a teasing grin.
she sighs, her face reflexively warming at the thought, “oh please. he’s still your guys’ friend too. i’m sure he’ll come by. and it’s not like he’s gonna stay for the whole three hours.”
“you’d be surprised what a person would do for someone they love,” akaashi says and then shrugs when she looks up at him in shock, as if he’s just said something completely normal. “didn’t you tell me you used to make him food for basically every game you went to for him? didn’t you take pictures for inarizaki just to be around him? well now he’s all the way here in the arts building to see you and i have to get back to my stand. bokuto’s waiting for me. i’m sure suna’s waiting for you, too.”
he leaves her after that, and she’s left staring at the flowers suna brought her. she can’t get akaashi’s words out of her head, and her heart won’t calm down. she tries to take a breath before walking back to her wall.
she sees omi just as she returns, and he gives her a nod, which roughly translates to he’ll talk to her later, but he glances back at suna and she knows he’s purposefully leaving them alone.
she comes up from behind, moving to stand beside him and follows his eyes to see the picture he’s looking at. it’s her favorite one of the bunch, the one she had posted last on her twitter, saving the best for last. she hadn’t even taken it recently, it was a picture from nearly a year ago that she had been saving for the right time. “what do you think?” she asks with a playful smile. “this is your first time seeing this side of my photography, right?”
he turns to face her, but his eyes stay staring at the photo for a second longer as if he can’t look away. “it’s stunning. i mean– i feel like i don’t even know what’s right to say, sorry,” he breaks eye contact with her to look down towards the floor and her laugh brings his attention back to her.
“you don’t have to apologize for complimenting me. there’s no right way to say it, but hearing those words from you means a lot. thank you, suna,” she tells him, trying to keep her tone friendly. if he wanted to question her words, he could, but she wasn’t brave enough to outright tell him anything.
“rin,” he corrects. when she looks at him, frowning in confusion, he clarifies, “you called me suna.”
“oh, right. sorry,” she apologizes sheepishly, and it’s her turn to look away. it feels too intimate to call him the name and it nearly gets caught in her throat everytime, but he keeps urging her to call him it and she doesn’t know what to make of that. “any questions you have about any of the pieces? you know how i am, i can go on for hours about anything photography related.”
he turns back to the work she initially found him looking at, “no. i mean, i think all of your pictures were great, and the titles really hit. isn’t finding a meaning for yourself part of the fun? haven’t you said that before?” she nods at his question, mumbling a small thank you. “i think if anything, i’m just confused by this one. it’s– it’s us. we took this picture together. last year. but you said the theme of this group is ‘home’ so it’s the only one i can’t figure out. how is this home?”
“oh,” she says, her mouth working faster than her mind. “that’s easy, well i guess for me–” even when he turns to look back at her, sharp yellow eyes looking into her own, it doesn’t stop her from saying the next few words. “it’s here because to me, you are home. all of the other pictures are mainly centered around childhood homes but the night we took that picture is when i really realized i had found a new home. a new place to belong.”
when he doesn’t respond, the realization of what she just said kicks in and she breaks eye contact, her stomach turning as she plays with her fingers nervously. “oh god– sorry. that probably sounded really weird. i didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable or be sappy–”
“y/n,” he cuts her off, the knuckles of one of his fingers under her chin gently guiding her face up back to look at him before he seems to realize what he’s doing and drops his hand back to the side of his hip. “it wasn't sappy. i just didn’t expect you to say that,” he explains with a small smile, and this time she can’t look away. she feels like she’s only being pulled in farther to him. “can i ask you about the other pictures, too? i just want to know how you see them.”
“of course, i mean– if you’re willing to listen. just tell me to stop if you get bored,” she already feels like she’s rambling and she hasn’t even started talking. finally, she tears away her eyes to look at her own photos, deciding on which one to talk about first.
but he's still looking at her. there's nowhere else he wants to look; even in front of her own work, nothing is more beautiful than her.
“i’m willing. i’ll listen to all of it.”
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extras <3
suna thought it'd be funny when he was buying flowers with omi to be like "oh man these are kind of expensive and i'm broke. you think you can pay for mine too?"
omi just looked at him asking, "is she not worth everything to you? is she not worth the money to buy flowers for?"
suna immediately dropped the joke
NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE A SORT OF FLASHBACK ! i'll make that clear there as well but just so we're all on the same page <3
one more chapter of slight hurt/comfort and then we're silly again!!!
kenma continued to have a stare off with a girl across from him and would get all snarky whenever someone came to his display and not hers LMAO
hopefully the images i chose for y/n's exhibit are okay :) i had a theme going for them and they feel a little mismatched but to me every single one of them is important
omi hung out with akaashi and bokuto and then kenma before leaving. he texted y/n later about his thoughts and how well she did but he left to give suna and y/n time to themselves :)
suna stayed with her until closing
she didn't even realize how fast time was going. a lot of other people came to look at her pictures as well and many stayed to listen while she was explaining her thoughts behind each photo to suna
a lot of things went unsaid that night. suna wanted to say he felt the same way after y/n explained the picture of them together but thought that was too much
thank u guys as always for reading <3
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title: Y/N and her boys [sneak peek]
pairing : Upper classman/popular kid!Gojo Satoru x F!reader, Exchange student!Eren Jaeger x F!reader, MMA Fighter/Celebrity!Ryomen Sukuna x F!reader, Childhood Bestfriend!Aki Hayakawa x F!reader, Varsity football player!Itoshi Rin x F!reader (use of she/her pronouns)
Genre: Alternate Universe-University setting, romance, fluff, angst (if you squint), slice of life, drama, all cliche romance genres unite! (Based on the Manhwa, Bunny and her Boys)
Summary: Y/N’s denied the existence of pretty boys and god forbid she’d ever end up dating one yet with one horrid break-up, she decides that relationships aren’t just meant for someone stupid like her but the problem is — five of them suddenly appear and god, why does it seem like they can’t get enough of her?
General warning for the story: mild sexual content, cliche tropes (help), mahito is his own warning, minor character death, mentions of depression, a lot of second-hand embarrassment from y/n's part (shes not a cool girl, SHE IS A BUBBLING MESS AND THATS OK <33), insecurities, bullying, and mentions of cheating
Notes: english isn't my first language! (dont judge me) this multi-chaptered story will probably be 20-30 chapters (idk) in ao3. you can totally tell this story is rooted from self-indulgence LMFAO. Im not sure if i should cross post it but im leaning towards ao3 more either ways, can't wait to release this on friday!
also can u guess who she ends up with :P rb’s are appreciated yay FULL VERSION IS RIGHT HERE!
SNEAK PEAK
“Maybe…Maybe we should break up.”
There's another round of silence between you two, and you know that you can’t exactly take it back anymore since you had said it loud and clear, “Woah, woah, I told you I wasn’t with Misa.” his voice turns louder, and the background noises are good as gone as if he had left the noisy place, “Where are you? I’m coming to get you-”
“I said,” you try to control the stammering of your voice, trying to avoid the stares of the people who cast odd glances, “We’re done. I don’t want to see or hear from you again.” and before he could let another excuse out of his mouth, you end the call. It is only now that you notice how your legs have been quivering and your mouth has gone dry, seemingly like a pup who had just been born and trying to walk. You lose your footing and sit down on the dirty pavement.
No tears were shed at that very moment, probably because you were only stupefied, and it was written clearly on your face that this wouldn’t be something you’d recover anytime soon. Heck, you couldn’t even grasp the idea entirely that someone you’ve been friends with for years and, eventually, a lover would do that to you.
Was it as easy as a snap of a finger?
“Miss? Miss?” someone calls out, but it only bounces back to him like an echo in a cave. You remain still, eyes blinking rapidly while the rest of your face is slack. Everyone around you continued to move, but you remained there like a decorated statue.
“Miss? Christ, you’re about to be–” the husky voice also stops, and it’s only now that you look up to find a man. He seems stocky but, simultaneously, smaller, as if he didn’t want to come off as intimidating when he maintained eye-to-eye contact.
He is incongruous with everyone who walks by since he desperately tries to hide his features with a baseball cap and a dark face mark. The only thing you can see are strands of his bleached hair, his eyes that resemble the sunshine that peeked through the glasses of whiskey, and the swirls of ink becoming visible underneath his coat when he stretches out his arm.
If this were any other day, you’d run in the opposite direction because he looked like an unscrupulous loan shark, but your body remains in a state of unknown fatigue that you just wanted to stay still.
You watch as his face softens, the lines on his forehead somewhat disappearing when he watches the color bleed from your face. “...Alright…” he stops, squinting as he crouches to your level. His thick thighs encompass the rough expanse of his straight jeans, and you wondered if he had been an athlete or something. Aside from his built, his presence was rather invigorating, “oh…” he continues, “Sorry, you-uh…” The confidence he had to throw you off is gone like the evening dust as he motions his index finger up and down his face.
At that moment, you feel something wet running down your cheek. It seemed like the waterworks were late.
You didn’t want to be a pity party in front of anyone, and you’d expect there to be only bystanders, not ‘good samaritans’.
You sniffled, violently wiping the tears away as you felt your ribs were too tight when you took one long breath, “I’m fine…” you respond monotonously.
Who were you even fooling?
“Right…” you carefully watch him take out a handkerchief, “Fine, sitting on a dirty pavement near my car doesn’t make you look fine, Miss.” he prodded.
“Well, what do you care, anyways?” you tried to keep your voice from cracking, but the stranger showed no qualms of anxiety or fear, nor did he seem mad at your snappy attitude. The blue handkerchief is laid on his palm, waiting for you to take it, yet you exhibit no signs of accepting his kindness. Instead of forcing you through like the usual status quo, he returns it to his pockets.
The odd man.
“Well, for one, I don’t want to run your feet over since I’m parked over here,” he thumbs towards the black jeep that’s parked in front of you, “And my mom didn’t raise me to leave a girl sitting alone, crying her eyes out…”
“Well, did your mom tell you to mind your own business, as well?” your body remains heavy and distant from the stranger, not minding if it came off as rude, but you’ve always been wary of them, especially the ones who claimed to be nice. You wouldn’t be swayed even if you were in a vulnerable place.
He sucks in a deep breath, quite surprised that you had the energy to exchange a vehement response to him. Weren’t you just about to bawl your eyes out?
“Well, you honestly looked like you deserve some niceness after whatever happened.” he conceded, remaining suspiciously friendly, “Piece of advice, though, if it’s a guy, he’s not worth it.”
“I-what makes you think it’s a guy?” there it goes again, the unknown tightening of your throat and the way the gummy lids on your eyes would heat up as if a pipe of water was about to burst and flood the segways any moment.
“It’s always an asshole who doesn’t seem to know how to treat a woman right.” he lamely explains, and slowly but hesitantly, as if he was waiting for you to move away, he places one hand on top of your hand.
Unlike a while ago, you weren’t as hostile, but you were confused about why the stranger suddenly did this and didn’t seem to tilt away like you usually would, “So go home tonight, Miss. Cry it out and wake up tomorrow for yourself. You’ll be fine.”
You don’t even see his entire face, but the way he gently caresses your hair as if you were a long-time friend had your lips quivering, and without even realizing it, your torso bends forward. You bury your face in your arms, finding solace in your makeshift fetal position.
The stranger says nothing more; honestly, you didn’t even mind. His newfound presence is comforting.
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Sherlock fandom
Big Brother’s Observations
Since the day I held Sherlock in my arms for the first time, I loved him fiercely and I instantly wanted to keep him out of harm’s way, whatever the cost. I was only seven years at the time, but I tried my best to keep my promise.
At first, it was easy. Child’s play, so to speak. He followed me with his eyes, always smiling, filling my chest with warmth and joy. When he learnt to walk, he never let me out of his sight. Where I went, he was close behind.
I taught him everything I knew about nature; biology, geology, meteorology, when we were outdoors, mathematics, languages, history, geography and logic reasoning when the weather was bad, and we stayed in Father’s library or in my room. He was like a sponge, and it became quite clear that he was above average intelligence; just like me.
However, there was a big difference in our personalities. Where I avoided other people, Sherlock couldn’t get enough of studying and talking to others. For a while…
The other difference between us was sentiment. He was full of it, I was empty, apart from my undying love for my brother. I told him he would get hurt if he wasn’t on the alert. He was naïve and always thought every person was good and meant well. For a while…
***
My heart broke several times during the years, and in the centre of it was Sherlock. His tears and sobbing were unbearable to witness.
“Why do they hate me, Myc?” he cried so many times, I lost count.
“You must stop wearing your heart on your sleeve, Sherlock,” I told him. “Everyone will take the opportunity to hurt you if they know you’ll react like this. There doesn’t need to be a reason other than they want to see you cry. People are evil like that. Sentiment is never an advantage, brother mine.”
He wouldn’t believe me. Not at first. It was a hard lesson for him, and I hated every single person who dared to give my brother such a difficult time, but finally he managed to put up an armour of indifference. I knew how much effort it was for him to maintain it, because I caught him more than once crying himself to sleep after the more trying days.
When he started university, the contact between us was sparse at best, but I kept my eyes on him of course. Alas, I was unable to foresee and stop his drug addiction before it was too late. By then he hated the sight of me, which broke my heart in a totally different way. He turned his back on the one person who wished him well. It was a blind spot he dealt with for years, put there by me.
***
I couldn’t believe my luck when Sherlock met Gregory Lestrade of New Scotland Yard. The detective saw Sherlock’s potential and promised him work if he got clean, which he achieved in record time.
Despite the trust Lestrade put in Sherlock, my brother didn’t trust him fully. The police wanted results, which Sherlock was able to give, but it ended there. Lestrade was no friend in Sherlock’s eyes. He just used Sherlock for work, nothing more. My brother failed to see that the detective cared for him outside of crime scenes. He didn’t even bother learning Lestrade��s Christian name.
***
I saw a crack in my brother’s armour the day he realised that John had killed a man to save his life, mere hours after they’d met. When I mentioned it, Sherlock waved it off as John’s need for danger, excitement and his military background, but I observed a second of insecurity. It vanished soon enough.
My instincts when I met John Watson for the first time, told me he could be just what my brother needed, or quite the opposite. His loyalty baffled me, but spoke volumes, and it increased for every passing day. He protected Sherlock just like I had done decades ago. I wasn’t entirely sure what to think of that. Of course, I wanted my brother to be cared for and kept safe from the criminals he recklessly chased through London, but it should be me doing that. Letting go and placing my trust in an ex-army doctor with PTSD and a passion for danger, wasn’t exactly what I preferred, but it seemed I didn’t have much saying in the matter. John Watson was Sherlock’s confidant and friend now, and I should be glad, but my treacherous heart ached for the loss of my brother’s trust and love.
When it became clear to me how John felt about Sherlock, I prayed to the universe to let Sherlock’s blind spot disappear. It had finally happened; there was a way for Sherlock to gain happiness and love after all, and perhaps his hostility towards me would dissipate a little if he felt content and loved. My prayers weren’t heard, and John was too scared to jeopardise their precious friendship to pursue the matter.
***
I never dreamt of that an Irish criminal mastermind should be the answer. When Moriarty kidnapped John Watson and Sherlock realised he might lose John when he emerged with that bomb vest strapped to his chest at the pool, the blind spot instantly vanished. When the danger was over, John had proved that he would sacrifice himself so that Sherlock could live.
“My life isn’t worth living without you, John,” I heard Sherlock say in the surveillance video.
I had ushered my men out of the room and watched the scene alone. It was a private moment I didn’t want anyone else to witness, and I turned off the recording once I was sure both men were safe and had finally confessed their love.
My mission was far from over, but my faith in John’s capability to keep my brother as safe as possible, was absolute.
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Knock Knock - Part 2
Part 1
"You have to tell me how all of this thing between you and Kaz started" Jesper and Vik were sharing a cigarette on the roof of the Crow Club while the others were downstairs partying. Vik blow out the smoke "You know Kaz would be really disappointed if I share any of this" "Oh come on, I'm dying here all alone without anyone to talk about the biggest scandal of the Barrel" the girl reaised her eyebrows. "Please" said him in a really high pitched voice. "Fine" the girl sighed "I'll tell you how we met, but it's very less exiting than you expect" she turned to Jesper with a grin "The story of how we started dating is way better" "Oh I knew you had good gossip, I'm all ears". So Vik started talking.
Before she started working with the Dregs, she found a job as a dancer in a club. She would just dance on a little stage, sometimes she would be a server for the night and other times men could pay to make her sit on their laps while playing cards or doing business. Trying to have any kind of inappropriate contact with the girls was forbidden by the club's rules, the owners were very proud of not being a brothel. Vik managed to keep the job while going to University, the pay was good and making money from rich pathetic men made her feel a bit powerful. And that's were she met Kaz Brekker.
One night she was requested by one of her usuals to stay at his table while he talked business with other people. Nothing out of the ordinary, except for a really young boy sitting across from her. Usually that place was for older men, but as she discovered some time later, Kaz was trying to enter a few legit businesses, now the he was officially the leader of the Dregs. For hours she looked at him, while batting her eyes and complimenting her clients. He must have been around her age, really charming, knew exactly what he was doing, even if he was decades younger than the other men at the table, and, most important thing, he was doing everything in his power to not look at her.
Vik could also sense some kind of pain radiating from him, it was diffused in multiple regions of his body and she had a confermation when she noticed his cane. His leg was hurting like probably all of his side and the arm he used for the cane. A few drinks made her brave, she got up excusing herself and while passing Kaz she faked a little fall, using his shoulder to steady herself. "I'm so sorry, I should quit drinking for tonight" she said with a little giggle. He flinched at her touch, but before the usual sense of nausea that human contact gave him, he felt a wave of relief, all of his pain just vanished until she removed her hand. Kaz's head turned up from the table, locking eyes with the girl that smiled a bit. "Such a clumsy girl that you are, let's get you free for tonight" her client got up to accompany her back to the bar, but he was so starteled that his gaze kept following them until the others started to joke about the fact that he was cosumming her with his eyes.
He came back with the other businessmen a few other times to close various deals, and he showed more interest in the girl, leaving her tips, buying her drinks, but she was always hired from this other man, so he couldn't have a moment alone with her. And then one night, he came alone.
The boy choose a booth in the most private corners of the club and started working on his papers. That night Vik had a shift has a server, but her boss told her that someone paid a lot of cash to have her at his table, so she changed into her dancer outfit, grabbed two drinks and head to the client. "You" Finally. she said almost excited "What are you doing here all alone?" Kaz lifted his head slowly, looking her up and down. "I came to talk to you" she faked a surprised face "And what do you want to talk about?" "Drop the act, I know who you are" "And who am I, Kaz Brekker?" Of course Vik acquired as much information as possible as soon as a young, rich business man set foot in her Club. Bonus point that he was even hot and kind of mysterious.
She moved closer to him, almost whispering in his ear, letting him take in her vanilla scented bodywash. The sudden proximity and the fact that she revealed that she knew who he was made Kaz lost his focus for a moment and the papers that he was fiddling with scratched his finger. Previously he had to remove his gloves because that place was insanely hot, and know he was looking at a single drop of blood coming put of his finger. "I'll take care of that" "Don't-" in one swift movement she took his hand and licked his finger, the scratch was gone.
"A Healer, you're a Healer" he said snatching his hand from hers and putting back his gloves. "I know that you're studying to become a medik, the youngest one in Ketterdam if you keep those grades" "You checked my grades?" She said laying back on the chair, raising her eyebrows. "I read your essays" Kaz turned to look at her smirking. "I'm here to offer you a job-" "Oh I'm not a whore" Kaz had just started to feel better after her unexpected touch and now he was almost choking on his drink "WHAT?" She did everything in her power to keep a serious face "I said I don't have sex for money" the boy was completely red and Vik couldn't hold her laugh anymore "As a healer, a job as a healer, and medik for the Dregs" Kaz sounded rather annoyed, she took a sip of her drink, that offer was completely unexpected. "Does it pay as good as this?" "We can make a few arrengements" "Well I have to think about it" she shrugged "What do you want to do now, I'm yours for another hour" before he could think of an answer she was on her feet.
"I can dance for you" "Please don't start dancing" Kaz was trying to look everywhere except in her direction "My boss is going to think it's very weird if you just came here to talk to me. Come on you can look, if you don't I'll be forced to get another client" Vik started to move along with the music, just for the sake of making the famous Dirtyhands uncomfortable, in fact, no one would make her change clients, Kaz had already paid for her and he could do whatever he wanted in that time.
But her little plan worked and he reclutantly laid back in his chair and started to look at her, her exposed body, inhaling the sweet scent that filled his nostrils whenever she moved.
For someone who despised skin to skin contact as he did, this girl was really starting to test his boundaries, and his nerves. The fact that she was totally unbothered by who he was was weird for him, no one dared to play with him like she was. Kaz had to admit that the girl had something interesting, she made him curious. Why aren't you scared?
After a while, he found himself thinking about the fact that he would have gladly gave away the rubys he had as shirt cufflinks to put his hands on her, to trace the lines of her tattoos with his fingers. Saints, these drinks are strong. Dirtyhands wanted to ask her if she had any idea of how dangerous he was. Another part of him that rarely came out was thriving for how careless Vik was. Careless gets you killed in the Barrel.
"Now you're looking at me like you want to eat me" before he could connect his brain, his mouth responded "Maybe I do" Vik was so surprised that she stopped her private show to look at him with her eyebrows so raised that he thought that must've hurt. He cleared his voice trying to regain his composure, cursing himself to have let that really weird thing slip out of his mouth. He got on his feet and moved away from her in a hurry while she called his name. "I'll pay for the rest of your shift, so go home and think of my proposal, if you say yes come tomorrow at eight bells at the Crow Club" he didn't even turned to look at her. Vik saw him talking to her boss, than he left some money on the counter and left the club without sparing her another glance.
"Saints he was that into you from the start" Jesper said when she finished her story. "I can be a very charming person when I want" she winked. He let out a laugh "Oh I have no doubt on that, if you charmed the bastard of the Barrel himself I can only imagine your effect on a common person". They kept smocking in silence for a while. "And so you went to the club and he hired you?" "Yes it basically went like that, I started to work that night. I believe you were my very first patient at the Slat" "That's such a sweet thing, and now I'm the first to know all your dirty secrets" "I guess you are". Jesper throw his arm around her shoulder, leaving a little kiss on her hair. "And then what happened between you two?" she chuckled "Well he tried to stay away from me as much as he could, even if I was healing him he just wouldn't talk, but one night I totally saved his life" "What?!" Vik took another cigarette a started another story.
Part 3
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72 Hours - A. Aretas 💥 ❤️🩹
Title: 72 Hours - A. Aretas 💥❤️🩹
Fandom: “Bad Boys” Universe
Character: Armando Aretas
Pairing: Armando Aretas + Female Reader
Main Storyline: Mike catches Armando “sneaking” back home one night.
====
2024
Returning to the Lowrey household, Armando Aretas walks through his own mindset, but this guy still moves enough for the next morning.
Armando shouldered his cell phone while entering this home and chatting with someone.
You exchanged numbers at the club and safely took public vehicles back.
“Are you back home yet? I'm settled.” You questioned Aretas just to be sure. Miami pulled wild shit all the time.
“Yeah, gotta keep my voice down, though. Mike's asleep.” Armando tried whispering, but his accented English only rasped toward you.
“No, I'm not.” One familiar greeting encourages Armando to pause.
Detective Mike Lowrey, Armando's biological father, turned on the foyer lights and crossed both arms, smirking.
“Oh, shit. Hold up. Sorry, but I need to go. I'll just call you another time ” Armando offered one of his last chances.
“Uh, damn. Well okay. Thanks for tonight. Bye, Armando.” Your sweet tone quietly breaks his heart when you end the call.
“Gimme your phone.” Mike gestured his hand once Armando silenced.
Because Lowrey pushed through Armando's earlier wrath, devices irked him.
Armando hands over his cell phone and sits in the living room, waiting.
Bingo! Mike scored the jackpot.
Pictures, videos, phone calls, and text messages all lined up his son's night.
“Fun.” Armando wouldn't make eye contact with Mike.
“Who called you?” Mike questioned his son about the phone number log. “Is it the same girl in your pictures?”
“Yeah. We hung up with each other when you caught me.” Armando said.
Scrolling again, Mike noticed everything. Aretas mostly took pictures after dancing with you.
"Tan hermosa.” Armando flirted in Spanish during one of these videos and angled the camera while standing behind you. Strobe lights flickered.
“Look. Do whatever you want, but don't be stupid. Good night.” Mike returned Armando's phone and headed back upstairs, finally trying to sleep.
Once the coast stood clear again, Aretas opened another text message thread for you.
Armando: He's gone. 🩶
You: Who? 👀
Armando: My father. ❤️🩹
You: Bad moment? 🥺
Armando: It's complicated. 😬
You: Ouch. 😥
Armando: Already miss you. 😞
You: Aww. Miss you, too. 💋
Armando: Good night, mami. 😘
You: Good night.🥰
_______
“Don't smile too much this morning. I just told my partner about your phone.” The next day, Mike ratted Armando out to Marcus!
Snitch! Aretas thought.
“Marcus will be here soon.” Mike continued. “Go ahead and finish your breakfast.”
If it wasn't for Mike's wife Christine, Armando would've left the house.
______
“Armando! You might not kill people anymore, but don't act buck-wild like your father!” Marcus pulled with chaos, upset. “Read books or something.”
“Marcus, now you're overreacting.” Mike wanted to ease the situation.
“No, the hell I'm not!” Marcus kept going. “This motherfucker pulled his trigger for a video and put you in the hospital!”
“Marcus!” Even Christine defended Armando by this point.
“Stay paranoid, Mike!” Burnett just told Lowrey the truth. “We cleared Captain Howard's name, but you still died in front of me because of Armando.”
“Stop it.” Mike stepped in.
“No, listen to me. Armando saving Callie doesn't free him, either. One bad night could put your son back in prison, Mike. Watch his ass. I'm outta here.”
Marcus walked away, leaving the house.
“Maybe I should plan to leave if you don't even trust me.” Aretas grumbled from the kitchen table.
“I trust you, man.” Mike then offered his true words.
“Not enough to defend me.” Armando shook his head. “You just let him talk shit.”
Pissed off, grabbed car keys to the Porsche and rolled out, calling you.
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Hidden Flames : Chapter 12
Word Count : 3.3k
Warnings : swearing, drinking, cheating but not really?, mentions of sex (very briefly), mentions of underwear (in a jokey way), drinking games, lots of making out, ANGST
A/N : Oooh boy this one was fun to write. Kayla and I had so much fun brainstorming this chapter so we both hope you enjoy reading it just as much! Special shout out to our Mae baby who also helped brainstorm this chapter! Much love
She didn’t know how she got here. How everything blew up so fast. How one second they were playing games and the next everything was seemingly crumbling around her. Stuck between her fake boyfriend and the man she loves. She can feel eyes on her, awaiting her next move, but she’s stuck.
Parties weren’t Y/n’s thing. They never have been. They were more Mingi’s thing. Something he picked up in university with his new friends. Something he chose over her time and time again. While her and Yeosang stayed home, watching movies and eating an absurd amount of food. And she wished Mingi would choose her just once.
So no, parties were not her thing. But when she tried to say no, she made the mistake of looking at Mingi’s face, and he just looked so happy, she couldn’t bring herself to say no to him. Forever her weakness : Song Mingi.
He promised to keep it small. Invite only their friends. Hoping she’d be more comfortable if there wasn’t a house full of people. He told her Mae and Wooyoung could make anything a party, so even with a small amount of people, it’ll be fun.
Mingi and Kayla set everything up, telling Y/n and Yeosang that everyone was coming to celebrate them, so they don’t need to lift a finger. So Y/n sat on the couch, glancing over to the kitchen where the pair were setting up food and alcohol. Whispering and giggling amongst each other. She hated that she couldn’t look away, no matter how badly her heart was hurting.
“Focus on me.” Yeosang said, gently grabbing her face. “Look at me and no one else.” His voice was soft and comforting. It brought her a calmness she only felt with him. So she listened, her eyes tracing over every part of his face. His eyes that looked at her with adoration. His lips that spoke to her softly. His nose that he liked to press into her neck when they were cuddling, telling her she smells nice. His birthmark that she loves so much, tracing it with her fingers every chance she got.
Yeosang glanced up to see Mingi and Kayla looking at them, both of them completely frozen as they watched. He smiled before pressing a soft kiss to Y/n’s forehead. Her eyes widened slightly at the sudden contact. And then she did something that Yeosang wasn’t expecting. She kissed him.
Everyone was confused, sobering up quickly as everything blew up. No one knew if they should move or say anything. Mae, Wooyoung, Cassi, and Hongjoong just sat silently, exchanging confused looks, as they watched everything unfold. Mingi was staring at Y/n, Y/n was looking between Mingi and where Yeosang went. Kayla was watching to see if Y/n would follow Yeosang, but no one said anything.
Yeosang was still walking on air by the time everyone had shown up, reliving the kiss over and over in his mind. He hadn’t stopped smiling since she kissed him. Barely leaving her side, one arm around her at all times. He noticed Mingi and Kayla staring at them more than usual, as if they couldn’t look away from the couple.
“What do we say to playing a game?” Kayla spoke up with a smile. Everyone began to gather in the living room, listening to Kayla explain the rules. To Y/n, it just sounded like a drinking game version of the newlywed game. And by the way Kayla keeps staring at her, she wonders if it’s to try and catch her and Yeosang in a lie. She started to feel nervous, and Yeosang seemed to notice if him squeezing her hand was anything to go by. So she focused on that and decided to just trust Yeosang.
“Everyone have a drink?” Mingi asked after all the rules were explained and everyone sat with their respective partner. “Oh kitten your cup is practically empty. Here let me get you refill.” Mingi reached for Y/n’s cup, but before he could grab it, Yeosang took it from her hands, staring Mingi right in the eyes.
“I can get my girlfriend a refill.” Yeosang says, still not moving or looking away from Mingi. Tension filled the room as the two stared at each other. Everyone stayed silent and still, wondering what the fuck was going on. Until someone had had enough and stood up.
“I’ll get her a refill.” Mae said, ripping the cup from Yeosang’s hands. “Men.” She said with a roll of her eyes before sauntering into the kitchen and mixing Y/n a drink. Both Mingi and Yeosang were pouting when she returned, but she really didn’t care. “Here you go baby.” Y/n thanked her.
“Can we start the game now? I want to show all you fuckers that Mae and I are the superior couple.” Wooyoung said.
“Oh please. You forget if you have underwear on immediately after getting dressed. You expect us to believe you remember anything about Mae?” Hongjoong teased. “Obviously Cassi and I are the superior couple. I mean, just look at us.” Cassi was sitting in his lap, one arm draped around him. Hongjoong pressed a kiss to her cheek, making her giggle.
“Oh do you wanna go old man?” Wooyoung said, earning a playful slap from his girlfriend. “Ouch! Hey!”
“I’m older than him you dipshit.”
“Ah yes but look how gracefully you’ve aged bunny.” Wooyoung replied, caressing her cheek before tucking some of her hair behind her ear. “Like a fine wine you only bring out for special occasions.” Mae tried to hide her smile. “Haven’t aged a day since we met.” She rolled her eyes and mumbled suck up under her breath, but she couldn’t deny the blush dusting across her face.
“Okay. Okay! We get it. You’re in love.” Kayla joked, throwing a chocolate at Wooyoung, who just picked it up and ate it. “If anyone were to be a superior couple, it would be the throuple that is the wifey trio. So be lucky we paired off with our men tonight.”
“Damn right. You tell them, Kayla.” Cassi replied, blowing her and Mae a kiss.
“The best trio to ever trio.” Mae added.
“You know how we can figure out who the superior couple is? By playing the game.” Mingi spoke up, wrapping an arm around Kayla. “And I think we’ll all be surprised by the answer.” He added with a smirk, pressing a kiss to Kayla’s cheek, taking her by surprise, but she did her best to play it off. And Y/n tried to pretend it didn’t bother her seeing them together.
“Okay. Everyone grab a notebook and marker from the table. Let’s get started!” Kayla announced, clapping her hands together, taking a quick glance at Yeosang, hoping to see him looking over at her and Mingi. But his attention was only on Y/n, and she was starting to wonder if she was wrong about their relationship being fake.
~
They were well into the game, everyone getting drunker by the minute. The questions were getting progressively harder, and even the long term couples were struggling. Yet, Yeosang and Y/n have yet to get a question wrong. Mingi and Kayla were taken by surprise, wondering how they could pass with flying colours.
Mingi was especially taken by surprise, wondering how Yeosang could know things about her that even he doesn’t know. He’s known her longer than Yeosang has. He grew up with her. All the things he learned about her past, Mingi has lived through with her. He’s known her longer, loved her longer, and yet it’s like he doesn’t know her at all.
“Okay I think we all know who the superior couple is. We can stop.” Cassi said, looking over to Yeosang and Y/n, smiling to herself as she watched her best friend with her boyfriend. Happy to see her so happy, to see her with someone that makes her glow.
“I would just like the record to show that bunny and I definitely came in second though.” Wooyoung spoke up. He wrapped his arms around Mae’s waist, pressing a quick kiss to her shoulder after pulling her into his lap. “I may not remember underwear 9 times out of 10, but I remember every single detail of my girlfriend.”
“Yeah, you probably could have left out the underwear part. But the other part was cute.” Mae replied with a smile, giving her boyfriend a kiss. “Some of those questions were hard as fuck.” She added, turning back to the rest of the group.
“The wifey trio still would have creamed all of you.” Cassi taunted.
“I think we’d rather watch you cream a different way.” Hongjoong teased, earning a soft slap on the arm, but Cassi was giggling, so he knew she wasn’t actually upset at him.
“Y/n and Yeosang, how the fuck do you know so much about each other when you two just started dating?” Mae asked.
“Yeah Y/n and Yeosang. How do you know each other so well?” Kayla asked, crossing her arms across her chest, looking at them like she was accusing them of something. Mingi was sat next to her, going through the last half hour in his mind. Memorizing every answer Yeosang gave about Y/n, promising himself that he’ll never forget a single detail about her. No matter what.
“Simple really. We’ve been friends for years.” Yeosang answered. “And we talk more than we have sex.” Mingi’s head snapped towards them when he said this. They’ve had sex? How did he not know? Then he remembered all the nights he was gone at a party. Or just out with Kayla. All the nights he left Yeosang and Y/n alone, thinking that nothing would happen between them, and now he’s lost her.
It wasn’t supposed to be like this. This wasn’t how the night was supposed to go. Kayla and Mingi had everything planned, but Mingi saw his chance, and he took it. Against his better judgement. But Y/n was still standing in front of him, hesitating. Does that mean he still has a shot? “Y/n.” He spoke softly, and she looked up at him. He could see the tears welling up in her eyes, the confusion, the millions of questions. “I-“ but before he could finish his love confession, he was interrupted.
“Let’s play a classic!” Mingi spoke up. It’s been almost an hour since the last game. Almost an hour since he realized that Kayla might have had Yeosang and Y/n all wrong. Almost an hour since the voices in his head wouldn’t shut up, telling him he’s lost her for good. “Spin the bottle.” He added, holding up an empty bottle.
This wasn’t part of the original plan. They were hoping to catch them in their lie during the first game. Call them out for getting every question wrong, but they did the opposite. As if they were perfect for each other. Made for each other. Soulmates.
This wasn’t part of the original plan, but Mingi was drunk and upset. And he needed an excuse to kiss Y/n. Prove to her that they were meant for each other, not her and Yeosang. Prove to her that they still had the spark they did in high school, that it grew into a flame. A hidden flame, because he was still scared to tell her he loved her, but a flame, nonetheless.
Everyone sat in a circle, the bottle in the center. It felt so high school, but everyone was so drunk that it didn’t matter. Mae took initiative and went first. It landed on Kayla, so she crawled across the circle towards her, crawled into her lap, and kissed her, her hands gently cupping Kayla’s face. “Goddamn why doesn’t she kiss me like that?” Wooyoung asked.
“She does.” Cassi replied, slapping him on the arm.
“Oh yeah.” Wooyoung replied with a giggle. Cassi rolled her eyes. Mae took her spot next to Wooyoung again after she was done making out with one of her girlfriends. Kayla took her turn, watching the bottle spin and spin, hoping it would land on Yeosang. It ended up landing on Wooyoung, so she crawled across the circle towards him and gave him a quick kiss.
“Oh come on. I’ve watched him fuck you and now you’re shy?” Mae teased, so Kayla gave him another kiss, this time more intense. “Fuck. So much better!”
The game continued like that for a while. Everyone taking turns. Only Y/n and Yeosang were giving quick kisses, while everyone else made out with whoever the bottle landed on. Somehow, the bottle had yet to land on Mingi. So everyone decided he should give it a spin so he could finally join in on the fun.
He knew who he wanted it to land on. Watching the bottle so intensely it was as if he was trying to control it with his mind. And it worked. When it stopped, he looked into her eyes, a shy smile on his face trying to hide his excitement. She seemed nervous, but he didn’t hesitate in getting up, pulling her to her feet, and kissing her like he’d never see her again.
She had promised Yeosang before the game that to keep up the ruse of their relationship, they would only give quick kisses, little pecks but nothing more. But she couldn’t help herself when it came to Mingi. Melting into the kiss quickly and wrapping her arms around his neck. And suddenly it was as if the entire world disappeared and all that was left was the two of them. Mingi and Y/n. Y/n and Mingi.
They shared a few kisses during their short lived relationship, but none like this. In high school, they were both so nervous, so awkward. It was all pecks and sloppy make outs. But this? This was full of passion, love, longing, need. All the feelings they’ve held back, they put into this kiss.
Yeosang could feel his heart break a little at the sight and got up from the circle and stormed off. Only then did Y/n pull away from Mingi. “What did I just do?” She asked herself, turning to follow Yeosang, but Mingi grabbed her wrist, begging her to stay with his eyes.
“I guess I’ll go check on your boyfriend since you’re so busy with mine.” Kayla said, storming off after Yeosang. Y/n opened her mouth to say something but nothing came out, turning again to follow, but Mingi stopped her again.
“Please don’t go.” She looked up at him, then in the direction Yeosang and Kayla walked off in, back to Mingi, and then down to his hand still wrapped around her wrist. Gently, she removed his hand, but he grabbed her other wrist with his other hand. “Let me talk, Y/n. Please.”
“We can talk later, Mingi. I have to fix things with Yeosang.” Mingi dropped his arm, allowing her to follow Yeosang. He realizes now he took too long to confess. She slipped through his fingers right in front of his eyes. He thought she’d always be there. That it would always be the two of them. But he sees now how wrong he was.
“Why do you look like you just got rejected? It’s not like you’re in love with Y/n.” Wooyoung chuckled, clapping Mingi on the back, who just shot him a look. “Holy shit you’re in love with Y/n? Why didn’t you say something?” Mae pulled him away from Mingi, lightly smacking him on the arm, telling him to shut up.
~
Yeosang was pacing in the backyard, trying to get the image of Mingi and Y/n out of his head. He should have known things would end up like this if they were to play spin the bottle. Should have known she would end up in Mingi’s arms.
Their relationship was fake. Meant to make Mingi confess. He just hoped he had more time with her. To pretend everything was real, that she loved him and not Mingi. He knows he can’t make her fall in love with him, as much as he would love to do so, but when it’s just the two of them, he can pretend she does.
He stopped pacing when he heard someone else come outside. He had hoped Y/n would follow him out, tell him she doesn’t love Mingi anymore. But this isn’t a movie. He’s not going to get the girl.
“I’m so sorry, Yeosang.” Kayla said as she approached him, placing a hand on his shoulder. “I don’t know why she would do something like that when she has you.”
“I know why. And I’m fine. I just needed a minute.” He replied, brushing her hand off his shoulder. “Thanks for coming to check up on me though.” He gave her a small smile.
“Of course. Y/n was too busy with Mingi, so I figured I should come make sure you were okay.” What did she mean by that? Were they still making out? Or worse. Did they go upstairs? “Seems like she just can’t make up her mind.” Yeosang looked towards the house, wondering what happened after he left. Did his leaving give them the perfect opportunity to go further? “What’s going through that pretty little head of yours?” Yeosang looked towards Kayla before looking back at the house and started to head back inside, but Kayla stopped him. Grabbing him by the arm, turning him around, and kissing him before she could stop herself.
Yeosang quickly pushed her off. “What are you doing?” He asked, but her eyes were looking behind him, and she had a small smirk on her face. Y/n was standing at the door of the backyard, frozen in spot. “Pretty girl I can explain.”
“Please do.” Y/n took a couple steps closer, crossing her arms across her chest.
“Kayla please give us some privacy.” Yeosang asked, his gaze not leaving Y/n. Kayla was shocked at how easily Y/n had him back wrapped around her finger. And she didn’t even appreciate it. Seemingly willing to leave the second Mingi showed a little bit of interest. Whereas Kayla would kill to be in her shoes and have Yeosang all to herself.
“See how easily I can take what’s yours?” Kayla teased as she passed Y/n, bumping her shoulder as she walked by.
“So just because our relationship is fake you think you can kiss whoever you want?” Y/n asked. Yeosang stepped closer to her, taking her hands in his.
“She kissed me and I pushed her off, I swear.” Y/n didn’t say anything. “Besides you started it!”
“It was part of the game, Yeosang!”
“Looked a little passionate to be part of a game!” He threw his hands in the air before letting his arms fall back down to his sides.
“You thought that was passionate? I’ll show you passionate!” She grabbed him by his shirt and pulled him in for a kiss. Yeosang was taken aback, but quickly returned the kiss, wrapping his arms around her waist, pulling her as close as he could. She wrapped her arms around his neck, getting more into the kiss. Loving the way his arms felt around her, melting at the way his lips felt against hers. Every time one of them pulled away, the other would pull them back, as if they couldn’t get enough of each other.
And on the other side of the door stood two people feeling their hearts break all over again.
back to masterlist
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when worlds collide
smau non!idol ningning x reader
17. anxiety.
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"Are you going to fucking stare at me all day, or are you going to start speaking?"
Ah, that’s what Aeri meant by "you’ll know."
You start to clear your throat and formulate your thoughts. While you think, Giselle starts the conversation.
"Y/n and I aren’t dating." Oh! Okay! I guess that’s how we’re starting things.
"Ugh, Obviously. You two barely know each other?"
"Don’t act like you knew already, Ning; weren’t you the one who ran away crying?" That didn’t take very long for the conversation to go south. You weren’t going to let this meeting go to waste, so you tried to regain control of the conversation.
"Okay! Let’s just calm down a bit. How about we start off with a positive conversation? I’ll start. Ningning, I’m sorry if you felt offended or betrayed in any way by me hanging out with Giselle. It wasn’t my intention. There, now, does anyone else want to give it a try?" Both parties at the table remained silent. Ningning had an angry scowl, while Giselle was smiling brightly.
"Apology accepted? Is that what you want me to say? Listen, it doesn’t matter what I think anyway; in a week we’ll go back to being strangers. Unfortunately, I’ll be stuck with this obsessive stalker for life, but you and I, Y/N, won’t stay in contact." Ouch. It was obvious that you and Ningning didn’t have the same social circle, and you definitely didn’t plan on staying close to her after the presentation, but did she have to be so rude about it?
"You know, I am curious about one thing, though. How did someone like you end up in contact with someone like you?" She meant Giselle when referring to it, and you knew that. You gave Aeri an apologetic look, and she just returned a bright smile. I guess it didn’t phase her; I mean, she has dealt with Ningning for years.
"I messaged her on Twitter. I felt like we had something in common and could be friends."
"In common? What being backstabbing bitches? Aw, the BB club, cute!"
"Nah, being framed for being buddy buddy with your boy toy."
"Okay! Things seem to be getting out of hand." Like usual, you’re cut off by Ninging.
"How dare you? You’re still lying after all these years? When are you just going to own up to being a slut? It’s getting pathetic. How many times do I have to tell you that Wonyoung told me what you did? Yeonjun even admitted to it."
"How many times do I have to tell you she’s lying?"
"Give me one good reason Wonyoung would lie about that. She’s my best friend."
"So was I. So, why didn’t you believe me?" The room was silent. Ningning's face softened, while Giselle's bright smile faded. You awkwardly cleared your throat and began to speak. Might as well get your thoughts out now before you get cut off again.
"I know you have no reason to trust Giselle or me. I get it. But what if we could prove it to you? Prove that Giselle’s innocent."
"And how do you plan on doing that?"
"Well, in this story, the only people involved are you, Giselle, Wonyoung, and Yeonjun. We’ve gotten 1/4 sides of the story. If you tell us your side of things, we'll already have half of the story together. If we can just get the other half, I’m sure we’ll be able to prove Giselle right."
"What does it matter if I tell you my perspective? It'll just be the same as Wony's since she told me about the cheating. Go ahead, chat it up with Wonyoung and Yeonjun. Why should I stop you? Why even tell me your plan in the first place?" Ningning began packing her things and signaled to her driver that she was ready to go.
Giselle rolled her eyes and responded.
"Ning, you know getting to Wonyoung isn’t going to be easy. We’ll need your help. Please. Just tell us, what did Wonyoung tell you?"
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masterlist ~ next
(Synopsis) Y/N had never been the type to take life for granted. You grew up with the mindset that if you wanted something, you had to work for it; So getting paired up with the university’s “Rich Bitch” Ning Yi Zhuo for your midterm was the last thing you wanted. Are you willing to step into the world of fame for an A+?
taglist (open): @azraism ; @kimsgayness ; @sewiouslyz ; @winieter ; @llluvbluy ; @i06kkura ; @everydayiloveyves ; @edamboon ; @rdfgfv
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My (F, 28) friend (F, 24) has a tendency to ignore her phone when she gets overwhelmed. She's in university, so this usually happens every semester around finals. We've talked about it and I fully understand and I don't resent it in any way whatsoever.
Now, the last time it happened was back in November. After I returned from a trip I texted her to catch up and give her some souvenirs, but she did not answer. Assuming she would eventually look at her phone and get back to me, I just minded my own business.
Except she never did. Weeks passed, then months, and my invitation to go out for a drink stayed unanswered. Every now and then, when I was out shopping relatively close to where she lives, I'd text her asking her how she was doing, if she wanted to meet up. The answer was the same: nothing.
I couldn't help but feel resentful towards her, especially because she frequently posted on Instagram about stuff she was doing. But I have really bad anxiety over being 'too clingy', so I told myself it was a 'me' issue and kept hoping she'd reply.
It wasn't until last month that a mutual friend (let's call that friend Anna) asked about her that I started suspecting it might not be just my brain being mean. Anna (who isn't as close with this person as I am) straight-out called it ghosting but advised me to try to contact her on Instagram in case she had changed her phone and lost my number or something like that.
So two weeks ago I DMd her and asked if she was okay and if she was having trouble with her phone and, just in case, if I'd done something to her to be cut off. A week later she replied and explained that she'd archived the chat because of the exams but then had forgotten to un-archive it, and that she wasn't upset with me. She apologised and asked me to meet up if I wanted.
She... gave a model apology, really.
But I don't feel relieved or happy or anything positive about it. As I said, I understand that she deals with stress by ignoring people, but it's been over six months and she's clearly been hanging out with plenty of friends. I don't want to be jealous or bitter and she is truly a good person, but this makes me feel like my friendship is an afterthought to her, to the point that she probably would've never remembered about me if I hadn't thought of reaching her via Instagram. I get it, we're adults, we don't need to chat daily, but it's not the first time a similar incident happens and it's always me reaching out first; and I feel like there should be a little reciprocity for this to work.
Am I the asshole for not wanting to mend my friendship with someone who ghosted me for over six months?
What are these acronyms?
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Practice || Van Palmer Part 2
I am so sorry 😀 University has been insane with hurricanes, car accidents and the like!
dialog prompts:
"Hold my hand" "Absolutely not" "We should kiss, for like practice" "I've liked you since you hit me with a rock at recess in 1st grade." "fuck you"
Characters: Van x Reader, the whole team
Word count: 2564
That night after Kevyn dropped you off at home you were pretty drunk, and now in your room alone to face your thoughts.
You had gotten so close- so close to just knocking down the safety rails and jumping into the universe that is one Van Palmer.
You brushed your teeth, changed, chugged a glass of water to avoid a killer hangover, and then flopped face-first into your bed.
You pictured Van, looking at you- though you after you had all but confessed to her. She had to know right? Even she isn’t that dense. Or maybe she is when it comes to herself and not characters on a screen.
You huffed and rolled onto your back. This was ridiculous- you’re being ridiculous. First of all, you never even told her you were gay. And she never even hinted at knowing it. You hadn’t even told her about your own questioning thoughts when she came out to you in the 8th grade.
Still, the look on her face from the party was haunting you. That look had only been shared between you a handful of times. The only other time that it had felt that intense was a time that neither of you had talked about since it happened in the 10th grade.
You turned, looking towards your old tv on the ground next to your dresser. You could see the scene playing out in front of you from years ago.
You were studying, well watching a movie. Lottie had loaned you Can’t Buy Me Love. You both had already seen it so Van was talking through the whole thing, riffing off of the cheesy lines. When the end played, and when Roland and Cindy finally got together, Van stayed quiet.
“I wonder what that’s like.”
“What? Riding a lawn mower? It’s not all it cracked up to be.”
“No- to be kissed like that.” You wouldn’t let her change the subject.
“Oh.”
“It seems… nice.” you needed to play coy, but you knew it was kinda of obvious what you were trying to accomplish.
“I guess… But like- what if you missed? I would die of embarrassment.” you had her hooked.
“Yeah, I feel so behind. Like everyone has already kissed or done more with people in school. I don’t want to get to that point and then embarrass myself.”
Van laughed, “With your aim- I’d prepare for that.”
“Hey!” You laughed and hit her arm, leaving it closer to her than it had been before. “We should kiss, for like practice.”
Her eyes widen, but you could tell her smile took effort now. She held eye contact with you, trying to size up your motivations. You tried to hold a look of passive determination. “That’s a good idea. Practice makes perfect right?”
“Right. So how do we do this?” you felt your hands start to clam up.
“I think you should just close your eyes- and I’ll just like- do it.”
You cocked your eyebrow at her, “But then I don’t get aiming practice.”
She rolled her eyes, “Okay, I’ll go first and we’ll switch.”
You nodded before readjusting to kneel in front of her. “Let's do this.” You closed your eyes. You couldn’t say that the first kiss was anything to write home about.
Van had basically just pressed her lips against yours for a second before pulling away.
You opened one eye, giving her a questioning look. Her cheeks were already a bright red against her freckles. “That’s the best you can do, Palmer? Expecting more from a self-proclaimed “lady killer”.
A little of the stress she was holding in her posture went away with an over-dramatic sigh. “Okay, you try asshole.”
You laughed but nodded, “close your eyes.”
She obeyed and readjusted. You tried to remember how people kissed in all the rom-coms the two of you had watched. You wanted to outdo her peck and maybe make her feel that this was a practice session.
You leaned in. And instead of just pressing your lips against hers, you left them parted until you had just started to make contact before using a bit more force and closing your lips on hers.
To your pleasant surprise, Van seemed intrigued as she leaned in, following your lips as you pulled away. You couldn’t help but smile as she whispered “Wait”, her lips brushing yours as she spoke.
You let her kiss you again, this time she didn’t seem as shy, she copied you, moving her lips against yours. In no way were you in sync. It was messy and a little wetter than you’d care to admit- but honestly how could you complain?
Van broke away from you. Her eyes had the same competitive look she had during games. Neither of you said anything- just stared at each other, slightly out of breath, both pink-faced.
Then the phone rang on your dresser behind you, Natalie was calling to see if you wanted to hang out- asking if Van was with you because she hadn’t picked up her phone.
It was a bittersweet memory now but you still cherished it.
The weekend passed- this year's prom fell before the state championship game which meant you’d actually get to go this year unlike last.
Most of the team already had dates, or at least those who seemed to want one. Jackie had all but forced Shauna to go with Randy but everyone knew she had no interest in him whatsoever. Natalie was going with Kevyn, which was great because it meant that you’d have a ride. Lottie, Van, and you had played to go stag together- so at least you’d have company in your singleness.
You adjusted some details on your outfit before hearing a knock on your front door. “You look great and you're going to have a great time.” You smiled to yourself in the mirror reassuringly before heading out the door.
Van was waiting for you outside, she wore a brown tweed suit with a vest instead of a jacket. Under the vest, she had a light sage green button-down and a stripped brown tie. She looked you up and down and let out a low whistle. “Someone cleans up nice.”
You smiled and started to walk towards her, swinging your body lightly side to side, “I’m not the only one.” You wrapped your arm around her shoulder as she rested hers on the small of your back, leading you to the car. She opened the back door for you of Kevyn’s shitty car before running to the other side and letting herself in.
“You look so hot.” Natalie winked at you from the front seat.
You winked back at her and blew her a kiss. “I do it for you, honey,”
She laughed and turned back towards the road as Kevyn drove away.
-
As much as you enjoyed watching couples make out and guys try to impress girls with uncoordinated dancing, the excitement of prom was dying out fast. Your mind was focused on how hot, sweaty, and smelly the enclosed space had become. You stood by the double doors of the gym waiting for Van to come back. She had gone to say hi to someone in one of her classes.
You could see her talking to the girl. She was pretty enough, looked confident, and based on Van's laughter she must be funny too. When Van leaned in to place her hand on the girl's arm laughing- you felt a spark of jealousy and figured it was time that you wanted to get some air outside.
You walked out to the spot behind the school where you and the team would smoke after practice. You had no reason to really be upset- the night had been fun and you had great friends. But you couldn't deny the sting that hung on despite your best efforts. You sat on the ground, wallowing in your thoughts for at least three songs. You could still hear the music from the gym though it was muffled. Your eyes were glued to your feet, expensive dress shoes kicking at the dirt.
Two new feet appeared before yours. “Can I bum a smoke?” You rolled your eyes, not laughing for probably the first ever ever at one of Van's quips.
“Don’t have any.” She shrugged and moved to lean against the wall next to you.
“Good thing I’m always prepared.”
After a few seconds, a lighter clicked above you before a lit joint was waved in front of your face. Who were you to deny a kind gesture?
You stood up and took the joint from her fingers, bringing it to your lips and holding it before sighing the smoke out dramatically. The two of you stayed in those positions for a bit, just passing the joint back and forth.
“Why’d you leave?” She asked. You could hear her trying hard to make sure she wasn’t coming off as probing or aggressive.
You shrugged, “Wanted some air.”
She nodded and pushed off the wall. “Would you be up for a dance? We can stay out here.”
Finally meeting her eyes with a questioning look she raised her eyebrows in a smile and held out a freckled hand towards you. You bit back a smile when she started to wiggle her eyebrows. “I’d love to.” you let her take ahold of your hand as you brought your other to her shoulder.
As the songs changed over the two of you got closer and closer. Forgetting the idea of personal space. Your mood lifted as it always did when you were with Van. You leaned onto her as she threw her head back and pulled you flush against her body. The two of your bodies moved to the music, not in time but in feeling. You laughed as she spun you, returning the favor before once again ignoring the idea of personal space and clasping each other like you were afraid if you loosened your grip you’d wake up from whatever kind of dream this was.
The lights shining through the window turned to a faded blue from the bright gold, signaling the beginning of a slow song. Without needing to voice the action, Van slid her hand into yours and slowly hovered on your waist with the other. You smiled, and she gave you an odd melancholy look before signing and resting her forehead gently on yours. You shut your eyes and reached your free hand up to comb through her long red hair.
The dance inside ended but the two of you didn't stop swaying to music only you could hear. The air had begun to cool as time passed, giving you a reason to try and close the space even more between the two of you.
“Van?! (Y/N)?” You broke apart at Natalie’s yell for the two of you, she was probably looking for you to leave, Kevyn being all of your rides to the afterparty.
“Shit- I forgot we still have to go to that stupid fucking party.” Van groaned as she rolled her eyes.
“Hey, it’ll be a good time. Besides we just have to say hi and then we can leave.” You grabbed her hands and started to walk backward toward the school parking lot.
She gave you an unimpressed look but nevertheless, let you pull her along gently.
Natalie, Van, Kevyn, Lottie, Laura Lee, and you all tried to squeeze into his tiny four-person car.
“Where did you go? I was looking for you for like an hour?” Natalie asked Van, turning back from her spot on Lottie's lap in the front seat.
“You know, dances aren't my thing- just needed some fresh air.” Van shrugged, barely visible due to how you and Laura Lee were pushing into her sides.
“At least we managed to get you to come to this one. You missed Randy getting caught spiking the punch though.”
“Damn, that sounds therapeutic.”
“You should’ve seen his face. Looked like a ghost when Ms. Jackson grabbed his collar” Lottie laughed, joining the conversation. “Definitely made my night.”
Van hummed in agreement, being disengaged which wasn’t normal for her.
You nudged her shoulder but she just brushed you off for the rest of the ride.
The party was hosted by none other than Jackie at her huge ass mansion. Van had made a beeline start for the drinks in the kitchen when the car pulled to a stop. You had to practically chase her through the crowd of teens in the house.
When you caught up to her she was pouring about four shots of tequila into a cup with a splash of orange juice. Her jaw was clenched. Her whole demeanor had shifted. You placed your hand on top of hers holding the cup. “What's up? Do you want to leave?” She shook her head and avoided your eyes, glancing around the room. You sighed and she rolled her eyes before gesturing to the stairs leading upstairs.
Van led you upstairs where she knocked on every door, checking if any were unoccupied. Unsurprisingly it took a few tries.
The room y’all had found must have been one of the many guest rooms in the home. A huge bed was in the center of the room with dollhouse-like furniture around the walls.
She put her cup on a dresser before face-planting into the bed. You couldn't help the laugh that burst out of you, “Van! What’s wrong?”
You sat down on the foot of the bed as she rolled over to her back. She tilted her head down towards you before looking back to the ceiling and groaning. “It’s nothing. Like it's actually dumb and I’m just a total idiot.”
She tensed as you set your hand on her leg, “I’m sure it's not dumb. Just talk to me about it.”
She grumbled as she sat up and looked at you with the frown of an insolent child. “This is embarrassing and it may ruin everything.”
“Well Jesus, now you sound like you killed someone.”
She looked at you as if to tell you ‘Seriously?’. You nudged her to continue but she just ran her hands together and looked down.
“Van… You.. You know I love you right?” You said it as a way to try to open her up but it held the double meaning, or hope, that this is what she was talking about.
“That's the thing.” Your heart sank- could she tell how you felt? Had it upset her so much?
“Oh.”
“Yeah…”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable-”
“You shouldn’t be sorry! It’s my fault. I’m the one making you uncomfortable-”
“Wait-”
“I mean I’m the one that looked to far into things and-”
“Van-”
“It’s not your fault that-”
“Van!”
“-I am madly, madly, in love with you.”
“Oh my god!”
“I know- mhM!” You cut her off by literally throwing yourself onto her with so much force you landed on top of her, pinning her to the bed with your lips.
“Thank fuck this conversation was a misunderstanding because I have been into you for so long it’s been torture,” you whispered against her lips.
You could feel her smile and chuckle before telling you “I told you that I've liked you since you hit me with a rock at recess in 1st grade.”
“Fuck you.”
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Interview with Profesor Moore (2018)
*Charles is sat behind his desk, waiting for the interviewer to start, trying to get into his "public" persona. Soon the director calls "action!" and everything starts*
Interviewer: Welcome to our segment, today we're here with the renowned internacionalist and professor of Mercy University, Charles Moore *looks at Charles* thank you for accepting this interview, Professor
Charles: It's fine, I'm glad to be here, sweetheart *smiles*
Interviewer: Your books are certanly a thing every respected internacionalist should read, don't you think? Even people outside your field use them as examples
Charles: I'm...proud of it, indeed, I've sacrificed a lot to write them
Interviewer: And today is the 27th anniversary of your book "Red vs Stripes: An identity conflict", isn't it?
Charles: Yes it is, almost thirty years since I first wrote the manuscript in, what in that time was, West Berlin *sighs* how quick the time passes, it feels like that time was just yesterday
Interviewer: Such a long time! There's something you especially remember during your time on West Berlin?
Charles: Many things, mostly how difficult it was to get some trustful and real information. That, of course, without putting the danger of being called an spy by the other side
Interviewer: Then how did you write the book with such corrrect data?
Charles: I met through the years some people that helped me, it was risky, obviously
Interviewer: Friends?
Charles: Most of them no, we were just colleagues and nothing more. We clashed for so many things that it was impossible to get along, we barely tolerated each other *chuckles* I clashed a lot with a man that was...his own kind of person, short-tempered I must say, but capable in a different way than me
Interviewer: He sounds like a rival
Charles: Rival? Oh dear, no *laughs* we hated each other, its just that after so many years I've thought about that days and kinda respect him a bit more
Interviewer: There was someone that you consider a friend?
Charles: Maybe two people, but I'm not sure
Interviewer: How come?
Charles: There was this girl, intelligent, brave and sly, which was very important during those years *smiles slightly* we didn't get along completely, mostly because of me. I was quite the bitter asshole during that time
Interviewer: I can't imagine you like that *giggles*
Charles: Yeah well, there was another man with who I got along pretty well. Quiet, cold maybe, also really intelligent, distrustful of every person around him...like he should've been. Ironically, he was the closest one whom I could call a friend
Interviewer: Maybe can we know their name?
Charles: Unfortunately no, that should stay as a mystery
Interviewer: Oh, what a shame
Charles: It is a ashame, we lost contact after I came back to the US. But the memories are ones I hold dearly
Interviewer: That's adorable, professor
*After the interview*
Park: What a liar you are, Moore *from the door* you? Holding memories dearly? What a joke
Charles: *sighs* Park, what the fuck do you want? I told you all those years ago that I have no shit to do with you or people like you. Are you fucking deaf?
Park: Just wanted to make sure that you didn't say anything you shouldn't *scoffs* but with all the shit you spew, I have nothing to worry about. You fucking hypocrite
Charles: *looking how Park walked away* ...Unlike you, I still a human, maybe a bastard, but human. Goddamned emotionless bitch
*Charles opens a hidden drawer on his desk, where his old notebook, a bullet cap and a picture awaited. He took the picture, smiling slightly when he saw and remembered that time. It was a time when he was fighting with Koa (@islandtarochips OC) while Mason stopped the Captain, as Aleks (@alypink OC) tried to stop him and Bell/Vasili (@welldonekhushi OC) was just watching everything from the background with a smile...and was Hudson who took the photo*
Charles: ...I should've smacked Nakiu with the chair *scoffs with a side smile*
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because SNW is allowing me this reading and because it’s something I’ve always headcanoned (way before SNW and Kirk/La’an), I’m just gonna ramble and muse a bit
spoilers for snw2 episode 9
(if you wanna read more Kirk/La’an thoughts related to the episode, here. I’m probably going to muse about this a lot in the upcoming days, and make more coherent posts)
Kirk isn’t in love with Carol. He likes her, but he isn’t in love with her. His and Carol’s relationship was always casual; if the Farragut was close to Starbase 1, they were on, if they were away for a longer period of time, they were off.
And now Carol is pregnant, which was unplanned, and caught both of them off guard. But Kirk’s loyal and serious, so he wants to be there for her and their child. Even though it complicates a lot of things. He might even think it will complicate his career, unless he wants to become his father and take his child through the galaxy, never having time for him.
TOS tells us that Kirk and Carol weren’t together by 2261. TWOK tells us that David met James Kirk and that Carol asked Kirk to stay away and never told David who his father was.
So there are two options. Carol tells Kirk to stay away quite soon after David is born, and he does, but years later, they reunite, but also they don’t get romantically back: “Were we together? Were we going to be?” and Kirk doesn’t really try to befriend David
OR they simply break up, but Kirk is allowed contact until a certain age. And after that Carol tells him to stay away. “You had your world and I had mine. And I wanted him in mine, not chasing through the universe with his father.” That could literally be after the 5ym, even. Or shortly before, but David remembers “that overgrown Boy Scout Carol used to hang around with”, so after seems more plausible. (but again, they don’t get back together) (which is something I did mention in this post some time ago)
[most of the stuff above is just my original HC tweaked a bit to fit new info from SNW]
Before SNW seriously introduced a potential of Kirk/La’an, I expected SNW to give us Kirk/Carol story. But last week, I was thinking and realized that SNW isn’t a Kirk story - he isn’t a main character (I know people tend to see it that way, but he’s not). We won’t see Kirk centric episodes (or at least we shouldn’t for a pretty long while imho or at all tbh) - his every appearance should be tied to the main cast. That doesn’t mean - as we’ve already seen - that we won’t get his backstory, but it might mean that a lot of Kirk’s life will just happen off screen.
(I’m not saying we won’t see Carol. They cleverly put her on Starbase 1 where the Enterprise returns to often. There’ll probably be an episode where the Enterprise will need to do something with the scientists at Starbase 1. Spock will probably meet Carol there as well, so they can also tick off another “canon” point. But it won’t be a Kirk story.)
I do tend to see Kirk/La’an from Kirk’s POV a lot because that’s just what I do (and because in the long run, it’s heartbreaking), but the story is written from La’an’s POV. She already lost Kirk once, she lost him twice. From the storytelling POV, the story should eventually lead toward something more positive when it comes to Kirk and La’an as a relationship. Not having them eventually get together (even if they part after or La’an dies) would just feel hollow and ??? Especially since Kirk confirmed that he had feelings for La’an, but he can’t act on them because he has a gf and a baby on the way. (and as viewers, we know that Kirk/Carol just won’t last even though the characters don’t know that)
(But also like, Kirk, pls, you have a gf and you’ve still kind of led La’an on.)
From Kirk’s POV, I can see the “it was a lost potential that never happened”. If Kirk was the main character (and not La’an), I’d probably even expect that. Kirk made his choice and La’an moved on. But not from La’an’s POV tbh Not giving La’an her chance at being vulnerable and happy with Kirk would be too bleak. But I’m also known for liking the “wrong couples” lol
Using her experience with Kirk to find that elsewhere would of course work in RL, but as a story, it’d be disappointing.
Well, I might change my thoughts after I see the finale and what they do with Pike/Batel and Spock/Chapel lol I don’t believe Kirk is in the finale but maybe I’m wrong.
in any case, if Kirk doesn’t appear in the finale, I’m totally using this when I figure out what kind of Kirk/La’an fic I’d like to write. I just want to give both of them happiness. Even if it’s temporary.
anyway SNW still giving me everything I want. when will it end? when will they disappoint me? lol (probably with McCoy LMAO)
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You Can’t Repeat the Past
Shuri x black!fem reader
Angst or something like that
A/n: Yeah I said I would write a Riri fic, but ngl I didn’t have any good ideas, so instead yall get a Shuri fic that is VERY loosely inspired by my least favorite novel, The Great Gatsby. This is not proofread at all btw…
Shuri walked around the party observing her guests, these were now her people. This was the first party that the royal “family” has thrown since she became queen. Yet the only reason it happened was because of her. Shuri’s other half, they hadn’t spoken since the snap when her then girlfriend lost one of her relatives. But this was what Shuri believed could be a second chance.
“Well how is moping around the party gonna get y’all back together? You should be out enjoying yourself!” Riri told her when Shuri came to stand next to her at the bar. “I’m just not sure what to say…” She turned towards you, watching as you reconnected with your old friends Nakia and Okoye, you still kept in contact with them.
“Just dance with her I don’t know, here let's go!” Riri smiled, dragging Shuri to the dance floor. "Circles" by Meg thee stallion was playing. Which happened to be one of your favorites, like many Shuri arranged for the DJ to play tonight.
That’s when you saw her, she seemed stiff but she was definitely having fun. Oh, you missed her so much.
-
“And here it is! Open your eyes my love,” You opened your eyes to see the ceiling of her lab became an observatory. She added a pretty blue sofa, which turned out to be able to become a bed. There were posters consisting of all of your favorite constellations and what times of year to see them best. She had surely outdone herself this time. You have always been interested in astronomy since you two were kids, so it was the perfect gift for your 1 year anniversary. “Shuri! Thank you so much!!” You said jumping up and wrapping your legs around her waist in a hug. “You must tell me about all the stars, now that we can see them.” You smiled widely at her, beginning to explain the constellations that she’s heard you talk about for the millionth time.
-
You snapped out of your trance when you saw her walking towards you. “Your highness-” “Please don’t call me that Y/n” “Shuri…. It’s been so… long” The both of you stood there in silence for a moment. “Come with me,” Shuri said. Grabbing your hand and leading you to one of the private rooms. “I just wanted to tell you how much I missed you” she sighed, rubbing her thumbs over the tops of your hands. “I missed you a lot too…” You said trailing off. “Let tonight be like one of those nights” The two of you spent the entire night catching up with each other, even falling asleep cuddling in Shuri’s bed.
-
“YOU CAN’T MAKE TIME FOR ME ANYMORE” you screamed back at Shuri. She had been neglecting you for the past few weeks, and the loss of your aunt was weighing down on your mind. “WELL MAYBE NOT EVERYTHING REVOLVES AROUND YOU”. In her eyes you were trying to leave her, you wanted to study abroad for your degree, even though she believed the best universities were here in Wakanda with her. “Shuri… we need a break..” You said, choking on your words. You had arguments like this for the past few days over the pettiest decisions. Whether it be eating lunch without her or Shuri spending too much time in her lab, and you were tired of it. With tears in your eyes, you left the room, staying at your friend's house before immediately moving to the US to study.
You woke from the sunlight peeking through the curtains, you remembered where you were. You were in bed with your ex-girlfriend, aka the Queen of Wakanda. As much as you missed her, you knew that you could no longer be together. You slipped from her grasp and turned towards her once again. She seemed to feel the discomfort of you moving from her grasp. But you had to leave, as much as you wished you could, you could repeat the past. Slipping out of the palace you headed towards the nearest hotel. Planning your return to your new home in the US.
A/n: This is so bad 😭😭 I know I just wanted to get something out and my anxiety has been killing me so this is what I have rn.
Tags: @homie0sapien
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overdue del lore update:
we're about to start the glasgow arc which is heavily tied to both del and tara, so del busts her girl out of the university and brings her back to the bookshop. when they roll up they see neville being weird on a phone call so del eavesdrops (real auspex hours) and realizes it's her mom azumi on the other end. del's told neville all about her parents (the tsugas) but it's brand new information that they're in contact. she gives him one (1) chance to explain himself and he bungles it by trying to mess with her head to erase the memory of what she overheard. she beats him by one success and Freaks tf out - he knows that's a huge trigger from the sabina days and now her faith in him is obliterated. she thinks he's tremere lying about being caitiff, and she thinks he dragged her mortal parents into the shitshow she's been trying to shield them from for years. he immediately realizes how badly he fucked up and apologizes in tears but, uh. too little too late.
he finally gives her the truth: she has fae lineage, and was meant to be a changeling. she had a fae soul in addition to her mortal one, and they should have undergone chrysalis but sabina embraced her before that happened, and the fae soul was displaced in the process. her parents knew and have been protecting her from afar; neville is actually a kiasyd, sent by his sire (also a kiasyd) to look after her.
neville says he understands if she never wants to see him again and she says she doesnt want to see him again tonight at least; not until they're back from glasgow. after he leaves she digs up some books on fae and starts doing some reading, and she comes across a page in one book that has a bunch of notes in the margins. there are some drawings as well that she recognizes immediately; theyre fae, definitely, but she knows them somehow. herself and her parents. the name below her portrait is aelsidhe aen tsugaen- the dragon wind. keeper of joy.
she unlocks a memory of ael fleeing the dreaming, her parents (they too are fae, not mortal as she always believed) telling her to run and promising they'll come find her; ael stepping through a portal into mortal baby del's childhood bedroom at her bio parents' and asking if she can stay with del awhile - "i need someone brave to protect me."
shaking, she goes upstairs to the landline she caught neville talking on earlier. she still has her parents' phone number memorized after all these years. she calls them, fully intending to hang up after hearing their voices, but as soon as azumi answers she breaks.
del is such a mama's girl :') she sobs through the entire call; they call her "my joy" and "my brilliant girl" and tell her how much they love her. she tells them she needs them to tell her the truth--she's tired, so tired, of being kept in the dark and not knowing who she can trust. and because they are the sweetest warmest most loving people who adore her with all their hearts, they agree. they confirm what neville told her and give more context; back in the dreaming they were her knights, sworn to protect her. they died helping ael escape to this world, awoke here themselves, and were amazed to find her again so easily--she and the true delphine met as children at school. they didn't know anything about vampires or the sabbat being after her, and by the time sabina sank her claws in it was too late. neville's sire knew/knows something about her, knew she was arriving in edinburgh, and sent neville to look after her. he was also the one who put neville in touch with the tsugas to keep them updated from afar.
del's friend/coterie mate mitra has been having dreams about this weird maze and he and a few SPCs have seen sabina there guarding a child trapped in a cage of thorns; we now know that it's ael, though we don't yet know why. del is going to have to face sabina for good to get to ael, and chances are good that sab makes an appearance in glasgow--as well as del's bio parents, the fujinamis.
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What did Reynold do and why is it a wrap?
Oh, it's nothing dramatic. He was just a guy I knew in high school who would regularly do strange and unpredictable things, like ask people to play the guitar for him or suddenly decide he wanted to live on some island with no electricity for six months while wearing only white robes (this is not an exaggeration). It wasn't clear what prompted any of these bizarre ideas, but he had always been kinda wacky so we didn't think much about it except that it seemed pretty unusual behavior for someone to become very intensely interested in at random.
And then one day out of nowhere he stopped showing up to school, which was weird because he lived right down the street from me, so everyone figured something had happened to his family or whatever -- parents died? moved away? went bankrupt? nobody really knows. This went on for a long time until one night when my friends were sitting around talking about it and wondering if they should look into this guy's situation more closely or something, and I mentioned that Reynold was involved in Scientology, and immediately they all burst out laughing because it turns out everyone thought he was doing something else, and only I knew about the Scientology thing because Reynold tried to convert me once after saying "we have to talk" while walking alone through the woods behind our house on a snowy evening and I told him flatlyet I wasn't going anywhere without my friend as backup, and he said okay and walked off to go find another mark and never came back.
So yeah, that's what happened there. The story doesn't end there though: years later, I ran into one of my former teachers outside of the grocery store, and she asked how I was doing, and I started telling her about this job offer I got in Canada but was worried about taking because I needed health insurance coverage and didn't want to get stuck paying big medical bills if anything bad happened to me, and my teacher looked very concerned and asked where I got health insurance now, and I explained that my dad worked for a university and provided group coverage for us, and my teacher responded "oh, I hope you know your father has cancer," and I was like wait . . . what? So apparently even though Reynold left town years ago, he stayed active enough in Scientology circles that word of him having cancer spread among various old classmates, including my teacher, and none of them contacted the rest of us. That was a shitty way to learn about that.
Anyway, the whole thing seems a bit ridiculous in retrospect -- why did I pick Scientologists specifically out of all groups as "the ones who could be trying to recruit me"? And also, what was the deal with Reynold himself, anyway? But part of what makes it funny/memorable is the fact that it's such a total coincidence, which happens to be exactly the sort of thing I try to avoid creating with stories. Which isn't surprising, since I write fiction based on real events in order to keep myself grounded! I guess it worked for a little while there. :)
(In case anyone ever wants to read more about this guy, there is a documentary film made by two guys who followed him around for a year.)
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“I need to know what you meant earlier by my time, [brother]. I keep coming back to that, and I’ve seen that you choose your words carefully, and I know my time was no mistake. Please.” His anxiety and fear was almost paralyzing in its strength, the only thing which kept him from hiding and throwing himself back into the nightmares was his curiosity. Icarus was completely still, for once. He glanced at Tim to make sure he hadn’t woken up.
Bold of Icarus to assume Jason didn't know Ancient Greek -- one of his closest friends was an Amazon. He caught it, but let it slide. "I don't think it's linear, since we're from different universes, and I'm not the historian of the family, but... Greece as you know it was over two thousand years ago."
“Oh.” Icarus felt something crack. It got a bit harder to breathe. “How long have you known about this?” His heart was beating perfectly fine, that fucking traitor. “How long have you known that everyone I once knew was dead? How long would it have taken you to tell me if I didn’t ask so many stupid questions?” His voice was quiet, but the tone was furious. He noticed his knees almost touched Jason, and his expression turned pained. He moved away, avoiding any contact, physical or that of their eyes. “How long would it have taken you to tell me that everyone and everything I cared about there was dead? Why did you put off telling me?” His arms wrapped around his stomach to hopefully ease it some. It didn’t help. There was a pressure in his veins and in his head and it was shrieking. It was so loud and it sounded like the pleas of a father to be forgiven and it hurt. Tears began to well in his eyes. “Why didn’t you just tell me? Does he know? Was anything you told me real?” He was trembling, then. He curled in on himself, and in his eyes was such agony. He was mourning a million things, all at once. “Did either of you mean it when you said I could be safe, that I could live with you, that I could meet your family and maybe even be a part of it? Did I die alone in your world? Oh wait, I’m sure I did. If my father was anything like the one in your world, I know I did. At least that Icarus died in peace.” His next words, the ones which would have hurt lost stuck in his throat. I wish I had never come here. I wish I had never met either of you. I wish I had just died. Everything would have been so much simpler. It’s partially true at least and they don’t get it. He wanted to hurt. He needed to hurt. He had to make his br- Tim and Jason understand what was happening in his chest. His heart was tearing apart and he wished he didn’t care so much. Furious tears began to fall down his cheeks.
Jason forced himself to stay still, despite the hammering of mistake, mistake, mistake in his head. "I didn't want to hurt you." Mistake. "It didn't even occur to me until you mentioned priests and kings." Mistake. "I thought Tim would have told you." Mistake. "I'm sorry, I should have told you from the start."
You can't do anything right.
He held Tim slightly tighter, counting his heartbeats.
"We meant it when we said you could stay," he added softly. "I-- neither of us wanted to hurt you. We just wanted you to feel safe. I'm sorry."
"Well, he didn't. And you didn't either. Fuck-" The rushing in Icarus' head was so loud and it was getting harder to breathe, but his stupid, idiotic, open, bleeding heart continued beating. "It goes two ways, I told you everything. I told you about him. And... and..." The fury in his veins was burning him. He needed to get it out, it hurt, he had to get away before he burned the only people left in his world he cared about. "It hurts. I trust you both and now my blood is burning me, and my heart is being ripped out but I'm still here." He was hyperventilating by that point, and his eyes were wild with panic. He pulled gently at the hoodie, at the part above his heart. Words were trying to escape, but they were trapped behind some fucking barrier in his own head again. The tears kept falling.
He couldn't breathe enough, and he could only hope that Jason understood. He hoped, with the functioning part of his head, that Jason noticed the present tense of trust.
But he had bigger problems.
"I know," Jason said, fighting the urge to reach out and hug Icarus because he knew that would be the wrong move. "And I shouldn't have put off telling you -- clearly exhaustion is nothing compared to this. And you deserve to be told the truth and to have people you can trust. And you have every right to be angry with me." Even though it hurt, worse than the time he'd taken a knife to the gut or a bullet to the shoulder. Stupid emotions.
Icarus put his hands at his throat and gently squeezed before both hands went back to his chest, holding the tatters together. He couldn't stop crying and his head was bowed to hide it, despite how much harder it made breathing. A whimper came from his throat as the rage continued to rampage through his veins and burn everything it touched.
He wished he could speak but his words had shut down. It was so frustrating and he wanted to scream.
"In through your nose, out through your mouth," Jason said, so desperate to control his feelings that that desperation was all he felt. Counterintuitive, but at least he wasn't angry. "If you need to take a walk, do that. I can also shut up."
Icarus immediately got up. He cringed and looked to Tim before he tried to meet Jason's eyes. I don't forgive you. I love you. He slipped out of the room like a ghost, leaving behind one paper in his rush. It was the drawing of Solace, looking concerned.
Jason let out a choked breath and dipped his head, resting his forehead against the top of Tim's head. "Fuck."
That about summed it up.
Tim was just kind of unconsciously vibing in absolute terror, but he was definitely fine. Yep. Actually, being curled against Jason was helping, and so was the tightness of the blanket, but there was only so much those things could do in the face of sheer panic.
Tim woke up with a start -- he was shaking so badly that Jason had to put both arms around him just to be able to keep him balanced.
"It's okay," Jason said as evenly as he could manage, trying to keep his own surging worry under control. "Breathe."
"Where's Icarus?" Tim managed.
"I fucked up," Jason muttered.
Tim shook his head -- that wasn't an answer.
"I told him about the time gap."
Tim stopped breathing. That-- Jason had-- Icarus would--
He couldn't even form the words, just that something about that was so, terribly wrong, and he could feel the anxiety and panic dig its claws in deeper, his heart stammering to pick up speed to match his racing, incomprehensible thoughts.
Jason could feel his brother's panic, and it broke his heart. He hadn't been this helpless since--
Absolutely not.
He forced the memory down with every ounce of resistance he had left.
And that's when the Pit raised its head. You know how to end this.
He did, and his mind immediately began making the calculations. Who was alone? What could he use?
He started to get up-- but Tim clung to his arm with a death grip, like he was drowning. "I know what you're thinking."
"Tim."
"Please don't leave me here," Tim whispered, and it was that that made Jason sit back down and hold his brother closer, against the screaming of the Pit.
HELLO???? IM KIND OF OBSESSED WIRH THIS TBH
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