#which fun fact!!!!!!!!!! Is why he erases them in the fantasy!!!!!!!

[whileyoureinschoolidothisallday]

How Touya pictures you as a villain as Hex: Aww, I don't really know how to fight! I don't even like it, it's not my thing. I just wanna be support! It's dangerous for me to be on the field. Do you really think I could do it? Would you help train me me, Touya? 👉🏽👈🏽 Then we can be a team together! UwU

How you actually were as Siren, stalking your targets down the halls covered in blood from wheels to wrist: Daisy, daisy, give me your answer, do~ I'm half-crazy all for the love of you...~ =)

[esther-dot]

IMO, I don’t think A stans who attack Sansa for her classism truly cares about it. I mean, they want A to be queen/lady (and there’s nothing wrong with wanting that) but such an ending would only be reinforcing the structure they’re critising.

And it’s great and important that A plays with lowborn children and tried to defend Mycah but that doesn’t make her a marxist revolutionary lol, it doesn’t erase her own classism. All nobles are classist, a few of them bother to treat peasants relatively well (the Starks, Edmure, etc) but that unfair system still exists. You can’t have nobility without inequality.

And I'll paste this one in too:

Unpopular opinion but if Arya’s stans genuinely believed in her as someone who isn’t classist, they would imagine her leading a social revolution that topples and destroy feudalism. Not someone who serves the conception of hereditary monarchy, serfdom (despite treating them with humanity), hierarchical social categories, etc. Arya as QITN would be a reformist, not a revolutionnary.

(These are so old, I can’t remember which post prompted them, apologies!)

So, I never thought more than being a good leader within the system was a possibility? During GoT they played up this idea that Dany was gonna change the system, "break the wheel," but that was mainly to hide the fact that going to war for a crown was a selfish thing to do, that she wasn't a hero for choosing that path. Considering how Martin has written about the tragedy of the Starks losing Winterfell, the little boys being chased from their home, I never imagined that his ending would involve a king or queen turning around and doing that to another noble child? IMO, there was never going to be any seizing and divvying up wealth.

In ASOIAF, it seems like the focus is much more on having a leader who will be capable of maintaining peace and delivering justice and taking care of some practical concerns. It never even occurred to me to expect an end to feudalism? So, yeah, I would agree that the most anyone could be was a reformist, but I didn't even think that was the idea (in the way fans would mean it) that Martin was tracking. It didn't seem to me that he was gonna do away with nobles, only that he was saying a good noble won't allow his smallfolk to be mistreated and wouldn't ruin their lives for the sake of a crown. I thought that's where the Robb criticism comes in. Robb should have chosen peace, not more fighting.

I also thought the good noble was being presented with Ned. Protect the vulnerable, be horrified by the death of the innocent, adhere to these personal values even when they are in defiance of what your world demands, even when it means betrayal of a "brother" or treason against your king. Obviously, Ned fell short of the ideal, but that's why his children will rise to power, because they have the same core values that Martin wants us to look at as good.

Personally, I think Arya being rebellious and kicking against the rules that annoy her is fun? My little sister was a tomboy, and I have sympathy for Sansa, but I'm amused by Arya. However, I do not attribute as much, uh, let's say, virtue to her behavior as others do. Nor do I attach the same amount of condemnation to Sansa (who recognizes class distinctions) that others do. To me, Martin used the Trident incident to illustrate how the class differences worked because it's a grievance of his that writers ignore them:

And that’s another of my pet peeves about fantasies. The bad authors adopt the class structures of the Middle Ages; where you had the royalty and then you had the nobility and you had the merchant class and then you have the peasants and so forth. But they don’t’ seem to realize what it actually meant. They have scenes where the spunky peasant girl tells off the pretty prince. The pretty prince would have raped the spunky peasant girl. He would have put her in the stocks and then had garbage thrown at her. You know. I mean, the class structures in places like this had teeth. They had consequences. And people were brought up from their childhood to know their place and to know that duties of their class and the privileges of their class. It was always a source of friction when someone got outside of that thing. And I tried to reflect that. (link)

With that in mind, I thought Martin wanted to impress upon the reader the severity of what the hierarchy meant, the prince can do whatever the hell he wants, the noble kid is in danger of being punished (Arya might have lost a hand, Sansa loses Lady), Mycah is killed. We were meant to understand, this world isn't ours. Arya in an important way, didn't understand how the world worked, not really, which is a tool the author was using, her grief and horror, to guide us through learning about station in ASOIAF. We needed to see and feel the disparity.

Obviously, Martin doesn't think that's a good system, but the author slapping us in the face with, “this is horrible but this is the way it is” doesn’t mean we’re to expect a total transformation of Westeros as a whole in the last few chapters of the final book. Martin wants to have some verisimilitude to (his perception of) medieval times, so imo, the idea was never turning Westeros on its head, but for people who cared to end up in control and be better. Not like a modern anarchist, but be good within the confines of that world.

Anyway, because of how many Arya fans hate Sansa/Sansa fans, I never did much with that side of the fandom, but I never had the impression they truly thought anyone would be revolutionizing things. It seemed to me that they believed her ending up QitN was revolutionary not in the sense that she would upend the system, but to them, having a girl who rejected societal norms come out on top felt like an important rejection of a traditional princess “winning.” I assume that's why so much of their focus is on Sansa and how she ruined Arya's life even though she and Arya have been separated for books. It isn't so much what the particular character will do as a leader, which theme is upheld by them ending up in a position of leadership, the "revolutionary" bit is determined by defiance of (what they believe are) genre norms, not societal overhaul on the page.

Now, if we accept that a total societal revolution is off the table in ASOIAF, and knowing that Martin opposes violence pretty vehemently, isn't in favor of imposing your will through violent means, how can someone who rejects society encourage gradual improvement? Wouldn't the "realism" Martin wants be found in a person, who say, can function really, really well within the structure of society but cares enough to try to make things better for others? Someone who can change it all from within because their societal position confers a certain amount of power, but also, they have a notable ability to win admiration, even when it is begrudgingly given? Someone whose compassion, even for enemies, is highlighted? Isn’t that someone who would be able to gradually bring about the kind of realistic change Martin would permit in his world?

[talentless-witch]

Seeing about fantasy bringing knowledge about actual hope.

Heres my horrible tedtalk about fantasy anime.

Everything was great until the nation of the red haired knight protagonists came.

Then everything went down to ashes, okay not really, but i really liked that trope mostly because man would suffer, kill himself, perhaps be mutilated ,traumatized and beyond repair and hed still have hope over people.

By that i mean that despite the worst case in the world being shown in their face they still have hope that one day people will be at peace and i think thats beautiful especially in this pessimistic times of the year

Now what became annoying was the fact that

1-theyd never acknowledge consequences that theyd face in their journey or just brushed complicated cases like it never even existed, which is a bad lesson

It doesnt even teach you why you should still have hope with those in mind.

2-in so many of these, theyd make them a brat and an idiot, but the worst part is that in 2 years theyd change their entire self, like theyre literally completely different, they suddenly become angel and saints when thats not how it works and theyd see being stupid and kind of bratty has an awful thing, Which imo is an even worse lesson.

Which is erasing your entire being, personality and such from the face of the earth, its okay to grow up, but its also okay if some personality about your past stays with you.

3-Kind of rare but in some of them theyd be straight up not brats, not stupid, but terrible to their friends, its okay to be bratty and not understand some situations, its totally different to just offend and insult your friend in the worst way possible because "you didnt understand" my word did you not understand.

Cue my favorite character from this trope and its not from an anime its from a gosh darn korean videogame, that is pretty much inspired on another anime and its clear as day but ANYWAYS.

I just like him

I LIKE ALL OF HIS GOSH DARN PATHS.

I LOVE RUNIE, LOOKS FUN, ABS, GREAT PONYTAIL, ABS, I WAS OBSESSED WITH RUNE MAGIC ON MY CHILDHOOD, ABS, DID I ALSO MENTION THE ABS

AND THE FACT THAT ELSWORD ACKNOWLEDGES HIS SITUATIONS LIKE. BRO.

I ALSO LIKE THAT although he changes a lot because his journey begins when hes 13 until hes 18 years old and hes a brat and kind of uneducated not straight up stupid(he can be smart at times), HES NOT AN ABSOLUTE BUTT TO HIS FRIENDS AND SOME OF HIS OLD TRAITS REMAIN, LIKE HES NOT ALL PERFECT DANDY ANGEL, HES AN ACTUAL PERSON.

I LOVE WHEN HES BLAND AS ROCKS BUT IN A GREAT WAY, NOT IN THE AWFUL WAY.

HES FINE. NOT THAT FINE I MEAN HES TRYING HIS BEST TO KEEP HIMSELF TOGETHER MENTALLY, BUT HES FINE.

Anyways i love elsword. Yes Thats his name.

Yes I did expect the game to be about a sword made by some mystical power which is called El for sure.

But no thats the name of the character, im not sure whats worse being called dicks mcgee or being called elsword.

.

.

.

I think id choose elsword.

i still have no idea who would name their child after a sword, elesis is a fine name, it may sound weird but not entirely because it sounds like an actual fantasy name, so what is elsword supposed to be and why would you call your child a sword, i dont get that, i really don't, its dumdum but i love him.

Still much better than being called lento, which is slow...IN SPANISH.

Some really smart person on the team really decided to call a npc character knight slow in Spanish and i could never stop laughing about it when i saw that in game.

You can make a bunch of puns with Ran too.

Chung couldn't kill ran because he just "ran" away.

Also IT IS REALLY AWFUL THAT THEY NAMED CHUNGS DAD HAS HELPUTT

BECAUSE IT SOUNDS LIKE HELP MY BUTT

I FEEL AWFUL SAYING THAT CUZ I LOVE CHUNG SM TOO AND HIS DAD IS WHOLESOME TOO HIS DAD IS AN AWESOME DAD.

talking about help my butt and prince.

Lets talk about the lord of hamel

The lord of hamel has never looked more of a presumed entitled rich pompous butt, like i could tell he was a bad dude the second he popped in screen, "the enemy could be anywhere!" Cue the most evil entitled looking person walking down the streets of hamel with the yee yee haircut.

Even the dude in bethma didnt look this evil or pompous, just looked rich and entitled that was it, but the lord of hamel just SCREAMS "YAAASS IM THE EVIL GUY, YAAASS"

Though another character that looks extremely distrusting that NOBODY except for chung and ain coincidentally noticed to perhaps be hiding some shady stuff.

Is add.

I forgot laby also calls him the evil looking guy or villain guy and i have never agreed with a description about add so much.

Anyways thats it.

Thats my tedtalk, for those who read this far, congratulations, you played yourself- do not- read this far its like my obsession and my lazy ass head.

[anashins]

Another Kind of Blackmailing

Title: Another Kind of Blackmailing

Pairing: Ten x You

Genre: (slight dark) romance, smut, tsundere!ten, fluff in the end

Warnings: toxic behavior, loooong fingering session, protected sex

Word Count: 4.163

Summary: Ten has always been a shadow in your friend group - that is what you thought. But when he demands sex in order to keep his mouth shut for something you have done that might ruin lives, you learn that he loves to stand out between the sheets.

______

His smirk was sly, the corner of his lips tilted up, but not radiating happiness. He was wearing an expression of which you couldn’t tell whether he was kind or the polar opposite. His dark hair was cut at the sides, the part on the top framing his forehead and giving him a touch of innocence which was emphasized by the sparkles in his eyes - but he was far from innocent.

It was his smile. His smile told you otherwise and betrayed his kind eyes.

His name was Ten. You knew him, more or less.

He was the best friend of your friend’s boyfriend, and apart from just getting a glimpse at him every now and then when you guys went out together, you basically knew nothing about him.

Ten had been introduced to you when your friend Hana announced her relationship to his best friend one night you had been out together with the whole clique. It had been a solemn, nonchalant and fun evening at the bar, everyone joking and fooling around, yet it was always Ten who stood out – in a very peculiar way.

He was always there physically, but at the same time, his presence was hard to be noticed. He was like a shadow, following his friends everywhere, and like a shadow, he had also behaved. He hadn’t talked much, had never made conspicuous motions or any other acts that stood out.

Ten always stayed in the background, smooth, calm and quiet – it was always like he wasn’t there at all.

So he surprised you even more when he had suddenly appeared in front of your apartment. You both had been out with your friends the night before and spent the majority of the night in the club. It wasn’t even midday yet and you were still hungover, even after a long, hot shower. The unwanted visitor had happened to appear right before you were about to go back to bed and relax for the rest of the day.

You didn’t know what to expect from Ten’s sudden visit. You stared at him, in surprise and slight shock, because out of all people, you hadn’t expected him to ever look for you. You had never exchanged any words aside from plain hellos and goodbyes. The rest of the time, he was a shadow for you.

However, now that his intense gaze was meeting yours, accompanied by that sly smile, you had the feeling that you were actually facing the real Ten for the first time.

“What do you want?” you asked, your grip tightening around the door knob as every possible reason for his visit flashed through your mind, but none of them actually made sense.Why would a boy you didn’t know suddenly seek you out?

“Well,” he started, and you wondered how soothing his voice sounded. Had you ever heard him speaking properly before? “Won’t you already know by now why I’m here or do I need to jog your memory?”

He grinned at you as you frowned, shifting his position as he rummaged through the pocket of his jeans. Shortly after, he pulled out his phone and unlocked it.

It was the moment in which he began to grin even wider that made your heart almost stop, and like a lightning that shot through your body, you suddenly knew what he might know as well. It was almost ridiculous how this event had been erased from your memories so fast. Probably because to you, it didn’t matter at all because nobody had seen it.

Or so you had thought.

“What if your beloved best friend finds out that you kissed her boyfriend?” Ten asked as he stared at his display, that damn smirk still lingering on his lips, and you wondered whether it would ever vanish.

“Look,” you started in panic. This was not possible. You had thought you could easily brush it under the carpet and forget about the incident, but things apparently turned out to be so much more complicated with evidence in the form of a picture now. “I can explain this. It’s not like how it looked. Actually—“

“Ah!” Ten lifted a finger and waved it to the right and left as though he wanted to chide you. “He is my best friend as well, and I can’t watch how everything will go downhill in his relationship because of you.”

“But that’s not true!” you protested and almost stomped your feet on the ground.

This Ten guy was mischievous and cunning enough to just jump to conclusions with only a simple picture as evidence. He didn’t even know the story behind it! It really made you scared of what he was possibly capable of with the snapped photo.

“I don’t need your poor explanations,” he returned, now sounding more serious than before, and it made you freeze for a second.

You didn’t know this guy at all, yet he possibly held your future in his hands. He could make your best friend and clique leave you and ruin a relationship if he only said one false word. He could twist and turn the story to make you the one who had behaved wrongly, although it had been the other way around.

If he was going against you, for whatever reason he might have, your life would break apart. Inwardly, you cursed at Ten because you and his best friend had agreed on forgetting about the incident and letting it pass.

“Why? What do you want?” you pressed through gritted teeth.

-----

Ten’s lips were surprisingly soft and warm on your neck, not rough and demanding at all. Yet, your body was stiff under his ever since he had placed you onto the bed. You didn’t make a move, because you wanted to show him that you were still mad over this whole situation, but against your expectations, he had been utterly gentle with you.

And you started to like it.

With a certain mindfulness, he had undressed you, and although you hadn’t looked at him, keeping your sight stubbornly to the ceiling, you had felt his hands moving under your shirt and surprisingly, they were soft as well, lifting your shirt up and undressing you without making you feel uncomfortable, not even the slightest bit.

It felt odd to be touched by a guy you didn’t know that cautiously, even if you overlooked the part that he wanted your body as a reward to keep his mouth shut. Though, you couldn’t go against him since that picture could destroy so many people's lives.

Ten was an asshole, was the first thing you had thought when he dragged you to the bed, and you wouldn’t have agreed on it if you hadn’t had one night stands before which made it probably easier to accept - or was it the mere thought that he was utterly attractive as well that you couldn’t resist to get a little taste of him?

Yet, regardless of how much you promised yourself not to enjoy it, not to give in, you still had built a certain affection towards the situation, towards him.

For someone who had blackmailed you into having sex with him, Ten was gentler, more attentive, more careful. He hadn’t kissed you on the lips yet. Instead, he had removed your shirt and pants without any hectic, but with ease, cautious as to not touch you too roughly or on the wrong spots.

Ten was now pulling down your bra straps, sliding them along your shoulders as his fingertips moved over your skin like a feather which made you shiver slightly while he removed your bra. You closed your eyes for a moment as he went down on you and placed your legs carefully over his shoulder. He hooked his fingers in the waistband of your panties and dragged the clothing down to have you fully undressed in front of him.

He took his time undressing you, and regardless of how strange the circumstances seemed, you grew comfortable with the way he treated you – not as an actual reward, a thing, but as someone to actually appreciate wholly.

When you opened your eyes, you were directly looking into his as his face was hovering above yours. It was then when you realized that he wasn’t a shadow in the back anymore, but someone who had now stepped out of the background and pulled you into his world where only the two of you existed.

His gaze wandered down for a moment and you couldn’t tell whether he was looking at a certain spot on your body or whether he was only thinking of something, but when he locked your gazes again, you could see a flash of insecurity on his cheeks in the color of rose.

You reached out your hands and wrapped them around his neck, pulling him a little closer so that the tips of your nose almost touched. It was strange that, besides the fact that this was all just a business, you grew a certain craving for what he was doing to you. Perhaps, you thought, perhaps this was not going to be so bad like you had imagined after all.

Ten himself was not like you had imagined, that was for sure. You had always ignored the shade, seeking for the sun, but now that he was enveloping you, there was no turning back. He was too intriguing.

“Kiss me,” you said, and as though Ten had only been waiting for your permission, he instantly locked your lips within a second.

It was not a passionate and heated kiss from the beginning, but a rather surprisingly mellow one with his warm lips on yours. You had imagined how they would feel on yours when he had caressed your neck, but the reality was so much more beautiful than your fantasies. His movements against your lips were slow and intensive, more chaste than lewd. As he deepened the kiss, he rolled his tongue with yours, passionate enough to make you crave for more.

You didn’t want him to stop – and he didn’t.

Where your hands had been on his neck before, you now tried to discover his body like a map, letting yourself get lost in the landscape. You trailed your hand over his shoulder, feeling every inch of his skin that was unexpectedly soft. His muscles flexed under your touches as you wandered with your hand down his upper arm, shifting it to his chest to let it rest there.

You could feel his heartbeat, fast and jumpy, and if he hadn’t been kissing you at this moment, you could have let out a chuckle. Was he nervous? For someone so cool and mischievous before, he was quite pantsy now.

But your last thought quickly vanished when he suddenly caused an intensive feeling to spread through your body that made you moan into his mouth shamelessly.

“Mhmm!”

You closed your eyes and grabbed onto his shoulders, digging your nails into his skin as you felt how his slender fingers glided further into you. He smiled against your lips as he parted from you. His movements inside you had made your breathing become irregular. All you could see was that mischievous smirk from before again, and you started to hate it once more, yet you didn’t want him to stop.

“More?” Ten whispered, his lips close to yours.

He slid his fingers in and out of you, slowly, to tease, then faster, to heat up things, your hot walls always welcoming him with a certain anticipation. Whenever he slowly pulled out, he expected you to make a sound in order for him to push them back in. Tit for tat.

“Yes,” you purred.

“More?” Ten repeated, his lips slightly brushing over your lobe and his voice seductively stroking your ear.

You bit your lip and nodded, telling him, “Yes, yes!” to emphasize that you truly meant it.

By now, you had already forgotten about the picture, about his reward – and apparently, he had too. As two of his slender fingers dipped back into you, you weren’t able to think of anything anymore but him. No shadow, no darkness, only pure delight.

You scratched his neck as he pushed his fingers further into your centre, causing you to gasp out of surprise and rapture. The only lifeline was his own body over yours as you held onto him, letting his movements make you drown in a sea of pleasure. He pumped his fingers in and out of you, sometimes so slow that it almost drove you mad and sometimes so fast that you thought you’d reach your peak very soon.

Ten’s expertise caused you to clench around his limbs, and it made you soaking wet with every move he conducted. You could also feel his own excitement increasing as he breathed irregularly against your ear, grinning in satisfaction as ragged moans escaped your lips.

“Aaaaahh!” you suddenly screamed loudly and opened your eyes widely as you grabbed firmer onto him.

He had found fun in playing with your clit, and you had brought your legs together over the sudden overstimulation on the sensitive bundle of nerves, but Ten reached down and spread you even wider for him.

“You said you wanted more,” he teased.

You turned your head aside and covered your mouth with your hands, muffling all the noises you were making as he played with your most sensitive spot. His thumb brushed over your clit, only lightly at first, increasing your anticipation for the former feeling even more. It was then when he started to pay special attention to that spot that you were having a hard time to hold back your moans.

He pressed his thumb on your mound, circling around the tip over and over again. He flicked your clit, caressed it with a certain pressure, and even used his other fingers to take it in between them and roll it tenderly to make the feeling of rapture more intense as you shamelessly spread even wider for him. With every motion, he had caused your orgasm to coil up in our groin.

As for now, you didn’t care whether your groans sounded shameful, you just let out every noise he caused you to make. You had grabbed the sheets to the left and right of you, entangling your hands in the fabric just because you thought you had to burst any time now.

And Ten loved it. He loved the shameless moans you let out, your suffering cries and your struggles to breathe. He loved how your body twitched and fidgeted under his touches, how he could make you so weak, and how you were obviously demanding for more.

Ten then pulled his other fingers out of you fully, leaving you as a whimpering mess, and you shouted out his name again, disappointed over the loss.

“Ten!”

His fingers were now sliding up and down your wet folds, dipping into your core every now and then just to pay attention to your clit again. He glided over your centre, along your folds, and teased your sensitive nub even more by stroking over it rather firmly, yet still tender. And with every stroke, he was almost triggering your orgasm to explode, yet he always withdrew again to pay attention to your folds.

Ten lowered his head and kissed your cleavage, and this act felt so intimate to you that you began to savor every touch of his lips on your skin. Without neglecting his work on your lower area, he kissed down to your breasts, caressing the thin and sensitive skin around your mound for a longer moment with long and warm kisses before he moved further to your peaks.

Taking your nipple in between his lips, he sucked on it and slid his tongue over your tip, making it more sensitive to his touches by covering it with his salvia. Withdrawing his mouth, he blew over the spot, letting you shiver slightly due to the coldness before he smirked and started to plant kisses on you again.

His free hand trailed up your bare side, wandering from your naked thigh carefully and affectionately up to your stomach, rested there for a while before he further traced to your other breast. He cupped it with delight and massaged it fondly with his hand.

There was a certain carefulness that came along with slight firmness which made you glory his touches and kisses so much. This was surely not about a reward anymore, but about two people who actually craved for one another and wanted to give in to the pleasure.

As Ten withdrew, you knew that he was going to go the whole way now, avoiding to let you cum in his hands and truthfully, you preferred to share this moment with him inside of you.

“Do you,” he began and you nodded.

“Nightstand.”

He took off his jeans and tossed it to the ground, rolling the condom over his length and then laid himself back on top of you. His face was right above yours, and you two were smiling at each other.

You wrapped your arms around his neck and turned your position so that he could easily place himself properly in between your legs, now feeling him against your center. Yet, Ten still waited for a little while, keeping your gazes locked, and you couldn’t see what was going through his mind, but you just wished for him not to stop.

And he didn’t.

He pushed into your core, slowly and deliberately, sliding into your hotness bit by bit while your wet walls were anticipating the moment he’d fill you out to the fullest. You closed your eyes for the moment and stroked the back of his neck, feeling every inch of him gliding into you further and further.

When he was fully inside you, he didn’t start to thrust directly. Instead, he leaned in and kissed your lips once again. And once again, you were surprised by how attentive he was, not wanting your body only, but also wanting you to feel good.

His moves were deliberate, and although he had started off slow and sensual, the gentleness was now mixed with firmness and strength. You could only break the kiss to breathe for air and catch your breath when he pumped in and out of you in a steady rhythm.

“Please, don’t stop,” you pleaded, and with a pleasant grin, Ten nodded and leaned in to caress your neck, planting hot, wet kisses on your sides as the slight moans you let out reached his ear like a melody he grew to love even more with every tone.

His thighs slid along yours while he had his arms propped on either side of your head for support. His skin brushed over yours when he pushed out just to slip into your hotness again, your wet walls clenching around his length with every thrust that he conducted. And the stronger he went on, the more you were pushed back into the mattress, the sheets already wet and soaked from the act.

You wrapped your legs around his middle, letting out a pleased “Aaaahhh…” as you felt him a little deeper and a little more intense than before, hitting the right spots in this angle. Your fingers dug into the skin of his back as Ten rocked both of your bodies rhythmically, pushing you forward with every thrust.

It was to both of your liking, and you wondered how perfectly your bodies matched, how you didn’t need to go through a certain state of awkwardness to find the right rhythm and how everything had gone so smoothly from the very start.

As Ten’s thrusts turned a bit sloppier and his movements a bit faster, you could feel that he was close, and so were you. He reached out to grab the headboard, his forehead glistening with sweat as he hovered over you. When you shifted your position a little, you spread your thighs a little further and lifted your bum a little higher.

And then you let out a cry of pleasure as another thrust triggered your climax. You could still feel him moving inside you, his lower body sliding against yours and his burning kisses on your skin, but everything turned into a blur as your orgasm hit, making you lightheaded and causing you to experience the most blissful feeling in the world. You let out a long moan, rolled your head back and held onto him as the waves of pleasure almost washed your senses away.

Your body shuddered under his as you slowly tried to catch your breath, your legs giving in and nearly falling apart, yet you didn’t let go of Ten. His upper body parted from yours and he held his head low as he gave you another long thrust, burying himself deep inside of you and reaching his climax with a groan.

He fell limply on top of you right after, your chests heaving on top of each other as you tried to catch your breaths.

“There is no picture,” Ten then blurted out as he rolled off of you, leaving you in a surprise by this sudden confession.

“What?” you asked bluntly, not really comprehending what he had just said.

Unexpectedly, he pulled you on his chest, laid your head in the spot between his arm and neck, and dragged the blanket over you two to cover your bodies.

“There is no picture,” he repeated, insecurity swaying in his tone as he stared at the ceiling. “There has never been one. I watched you both from the very beginning. I knew that it hadn’t been your fault that he went outside shortly after you did, and I also knew that he had mistaken you for your best friend since your hairstyle is the same. The darkness only added to the confusion. Not to mention that he was a little bit more drunk than he should have been. I knew that it was only a short peck in confusion and that you scolded him right afterwards.”

As for now, you didn’t really care about the story behind this bluff, because everything he had said was true. There was nothing you needed to clear up anymore, but there was another thing that made you think ever since he had mentioned it. You got up and supported your position with your elbow on the mattress as you leaned in to him.

“You knew all this time?” you asked perplexed, but rather surprised than angry. “You have followed me?”

As Ten turned his face to you, you could finally see his slightly flushed cheeks. It was only a light shade of pink, but it was there and suddenly, you smiled.

“To confess… I have been following you all this time,” he explained with a shyer voice. “My eyes were always on you whereas you never seemed to notice me. I’ve never had the guts to approach you for a decent conversation apart from hellos and goodbyes. When you went outside all by yourself last night, I thought I could finally gather enough courage to talk to you. But I saw you with him and I got mad, I guess.”

So, this was it. He had always been a shadow in the background, but he had always been your shadow, following you with his eyes silently, but with much affection – whereas it had been you who had shut him out from everything, but mostly, from your own attention.

Behind the façade, Ten was only a shy guy who was probably awkward with people, a bit insecure and too shy to approach a girl that he liked. Behind that façade, Ten had been jealous that someone else could have taken interest in the girl he had laid his eyes on. His jealousy and madness had led him to act on his feelings - childish and catty as he had gone overboard with blackmailing you.

But Ten had never treated you wrongly.

His tenderness and carefulness had constantly proven to you that you could have stopped whenever you wanted him to, he had always been waiting for your own responses to his acts, never demanding too much.

Behind the mischievous smile, there was only a shy boy who wanted to get to know the girl he liked.

“Hey Ten,” you started after a while, and now it was you who wore that sly grin, “do you like me?”

And now, the redness coloring his cheeks couldn’t be missed that easily anymore. It was enough of an answer for you. With a laugh, you laid yourself beside him again, and with pleasure, he wrapped his arm around your middle and pulled you a little closer.

“How about a date later?” he muttered after a moment while he played with some strands of your hair.

With a smile, you answered happily, “That would be great.”

[astaroth1357]

The Demon Brothers (Minus Asmo) at Their Worst  Pt. 1 (Lucifer, Mammon, Levi)

To the anons who gave me this idea, here it is. Unfortunately, I can’t say I’m all that happy to bring it to you, cause yikes this hurt to write. I’m grateful, however, because I believe I’m better for it. You shouldn’t always stay in your comfort zone. I left out Asmodeus for personal reasons. Regardless of my ability, given the nature of this challenge, I don’t feel comfortable with writing nor posting graphic content of sexual violence and chose to refrain from doing so. Please do not ask for this to be written at a later date, I will politely refuse then as I am now.

Check out the Masterlist for more.

Warnings: THEIR SINS HAVE BEEN TAKEN TO AN EXTREME (AND ALL THAT IMPLIES), Abusive/Controlling Relationships, Violence, Threat of Human Trafficking, Drowning, Angst, Regret, Suicidal Thoughts

This is all for the purposes of fantasy and in no way an endorsement for these behaviors in real life. Be nice (and smart) with your lives, my friends.

Intro: Maybe the MC should have known better. It should have sunk in a long time ago that they were in incredibly risky territory... They should have remembered that these men, though they call them friends, family, and perhaps even lovers, are still demons at their heart and core. Each of them are the embodiment of some of the worst behaviors man has to offer... MC, there are some people you just shouldn’t date, even if they love you, and now you suffer the consequences...

Lucifer

It’s not difficult to see how Pride can go awry. Self-confidence and dignity are wonderful things, but let them build up unchecked and all manner of petty, vindictive behavior can surface from within a person... 

Lucifer is far from immune to these flare ups. In fact, he falls victim to them so often that they may as well be ingrained in his personality. If you do anything that mocks or belittles him, even if it’s small, you’ll get a reaction. One that’s usually more severe than offense calls for...

The MC knew this going into a relationship with him. Supposedly, they knew all the no-go zones, too. Don’t make fun of him or Diavolo, don’t mention the Fall or his back, don’t call him a nag... That sort of thing.

What they hadn’t expected was the full brunt of the expectations suddenly leveled on them.

To say Lucifer was demanding would be an understatement. Everything about him had to be poised, powerful, collected, and perfect. Whether he realized it or not, these expectations bled into their relationship as well.

It started with him nitpicking little details... The way they stood, how they styled their hair, maybe a comment or two on what they ate. But it progressively got worse...

Suddenly he found problems with the way they dressed, what they listened to, what shows they watched, even how they greeted him in the mornings!

Before too long, nothing was right to him… Nothing was good enough. They were his other half, his biggest vulnerability, and in order for him to feel secure about that they had to be perfect… However Lucifer defined it.

They listened to him at first. Though his comments stung, he could be so loving too… He truly made them feel special. Like he wouldn’t be trying so hard if it were anyone but them...

But pretty words and kind actions could only go so far. They couldn’t completely erase the vitriol being tossed at them day after day… 

Slowly, with every little change, they could feel themselves start to dwindle… The choices they made felt foreign, the lifestyle they held became draining, and then one day they realized they didn’t even look right anymore… They were no longer the person they wanted to be. 

Lucifer was doing what he set out to do: train them, break them, then mold them into something new... So they could be perfect...

Just like him.

One day, however, they just couldn’t take being the person he wanted anymore...

He found them in their bedroom just before a party that Diavolo had been planning for weeks. Their hair wasn’t fixed and their clothes were a mess. His frustration nearly skyrocketed until he saw their face, vacant and broken, staring blankly straight ahead…

He couldn’t rouse them. They wouldn’t move no matter how much he shouted, threatened, or swore...

….they didn’t even budge when he begged…

His brothers eventually noticed something amiss and took them away. Their disgust with him was fairly evident… They probably would have tried something had he not been the strongest.

He had taken something wonderful and squashed it... Hurt someone he truly loved and ruined what they could have had to protect his damn ego…

Lilith, his brothers, and Satan especially… was everyone he tried to care for just bound to end up broken too…?

The MC’s recovery was slow. They had a lot of damage to repair and a whole new identity to build. He stayed out of it as much as he could, burying himself in work and seeing his brothers less and less...

He’d done enough damage to them anyway...

Mammon

The Greedy, Scummy Second-Born… Words to etch on his tombstone. Mammon had heard it all before from all angles: the demons above him, below him, hell even a passersby on the street would know his face and his laundry list of a rap sheet...

The one person who seemed to look past all that was MC.

He truly didn’t know what sort of karma he’d gained or luck he scored to have them in his life. They didn’t just see him at his best side, they made him want to fix his worst...

But that’s easier said than done, isn’t it?

The sad truth is Mammon is a gambler at heart. Oh he loves the money, the riches, fine things, and the bling but what else does he enjoy? The rush.

There’s nothing like that feeling of triumphant when the dice falls your way or the pure exhilaration of a close bet. When all cards are on the table and everything’s stacked against you, eking out that win can cause a head-rush better than any orgasm he’s ever had... The higher the stakes? The better the high.

But maybe he went a little too far…

It’s one thing to bet Grimm, he can make more of that in a night. It’s another to bet items, harder to replace but not impossible. People…? Well. If you want high stakes…

MC was actually with him that night when he made the “great” decision to bet his most valuable treasure on poker match. He was running out of Grimm and thought that the added risk would make him play better…

He thought wrong.

MC hadn’t been at the table at the time he made the deal, but they had come back just in time to see him get his ass handed to him. He lost. Spectacularly.

When the other demons there came over to encircle MC, it already felt like his world was crumbling down around him... The look of confusion, then hurt and betrayal in their eyes forever seared themselves into his memory.

“You bet me in a poker game?!”

It sounds almost comical, but he knew what the demons were planning to do to them wasn't. And just seeing the way his human’s wrist snapped when one of the men wrenched their arm from them confirmed it.

He wouldn’t let them get away with that. When the threats escalated to violence, he took his share of punches but in the end he was left standing.

The MC was furious. He had just whittled their entire existence down to a bargaining chip and one that he tossed away carelessly…

Yeah, he’s truly a scumbag, isn’t he?

They didn’t talk to him for quite a while, despite him begging for forgiveness. There was always a part of him that wondered why he even bothered… He had done it before, and in another gambling-induced high he would probably do it again…

They’d honestly be better off without him...

Leviathan

It’s, frankly, quite difficult to be the Avatar of Envy. Every day Levi feels uncomfortable in his own skin… Like he doesn’t measure up to this or that or like he’s not worthy of being in the meager position afforded to him. He preferred to hide himself away and try not to dwell on it… but then MC came along…

For once, he felt like he had something. Something truly special. Something one of a kind and like no other… He couldn’t point to any of his brothers and say that they had something better, hell, he couldn’t even point to Diavolo and say that he had a finer version.

No. He had them. The one, the only, MC. Better than all the rest. His only great accomplishment in his miserable, pathetic life...

… so why did they keep leaving him…?

It didn’t hurt that badly at first when they’d tell him they couldn’t go watch some new anime with him because they had other plans. Sometimes they’d go off shopping with Mammon or have lunch with Beel… That was fine. Understandable.

At least that’s what he’d tell himself.

After a while though, he started to feel lonely… rejected… Was he not good enough for them? Surely that had to be it, right?? A miserable shut-in otaku with someone like them? What a joke!

Any time he’d voice his insecurities, they’d always say the same things: “No, don’t be silly!” “I really do want to be with you.” “I love you, Levi. Don’t you believe me?”

No. He didn’t. With each passing hour spent away from him, time where he would get shafted for one of his brothers instead, he believed them less and less…

Soon all he heard was lies…

Something possessed him that day. MC had just missed their third live stream in a row in order to be with his brothers instead. Which one was it? It didn’t really matter. He felt the stinging pain of isolation all the same…

When the MC walked into his room they had no way of knowing that the festering hatred and inadequacy that had been stewing in him for months was about to spill over. His anger was so quick to spark and their human body too weak to resist...

It was only once he realized how long he had their head forced under the water of his aquarium that he finally let them up for air.

He was stepping over himself to apologize, stammering incoherently through his tears how he just lost control and didn’t know what came over him!

His brothers weren’t forgiving. Not in the slightest. Each of them seemed to want to beat him within an inch of his life and he didn’t blame them… If he could get away with it, he’d march himself into the sea and let it serve as his rightful prison…

His punishments were severe, but not unending, and soon he was back in his room again. Now he never leaves it and the MC is never allowed back in, even if they want to be.

He now, truly, doesn’t deserve them at all...

Link to Part Two: Satan, Beel, Belphie

[instasiswetrust]

“Mindflayer ... from Dungeons and Dragons, right?” Harrington’s voice sounds uniquely fragile. Like thin ice and crystal glass, one wayward push and he’d shatter.

He hates his stage name. He hates it so fucking much. It aches and hurts like an old scar.

“Yep.” He says, popping the p and flashing his favorite client a smile that he doesn’t mean at all. “Used to love to play, but when I moved here ... never found a party. It’s a fun stage name, even if it doesn’t really fit me.”

He’s too loose-lipped. Half of that was a secret he was supposed to take to the grave. It’s too nerdy an admittance. It makes his elbow and ribs ache, like phantom breaks.

“No.” Harrington whispers, settling into the softness of the stylized bed. “No, it suits you.”

Billy pauses. Raises an eyebrow.

“You have that kind of ... enchanting presence. And - and I’ve never played dungeons and dragons, but my brother does. I know enough.” And there’s an awkward laugh. Nervous. Honest.

Harrington lays upon the altar-bed with his limbs spread, ready for the restraints. Ready for the 80’s gothic fantasy wet dreams that the room embodies so well. There’s a smile on his face and a shine to his eyes. “So flay my mind. Give me that dying fantasy that the corebooks preach about.”

“And what would that be, dollface?” Billy finds his voice steady and stable, even if his soul’s lost its way.

Steve Harrington swallows. His Adam’s apple bobs in a way that speaks of sorrow and loneliness.

“Love.” He whispers, and Billy knows this is the horizon before him. “I want you to make me believe that I’m loved. Just this once.”

---

Alcohol and heartache are things that should never be mixed. Steve knows this, and yet he refuses to follow the one rule he insisted on Dustin learning.

It's the only reason he's able to request something like that. To lower his mask enough to show the fragility underneath the marble exterior.

A ring. That's what the picture Will sent Dustin had shown. A ring on Jonathan’s finger, and Nancy down on one knee. Engagement. Steve hadn't been able to stay long enough to know the details.

So when Mindflayer calls him Princess, when he presses soft kisses to his lips and thrusts with agonizing slowness. Well, he’s not surprised when the first sob punches out of his chest in a rush.

Fragile. Broken. Ugly. Heart-wrenching.

He wants to cover his mouth but his hands are still bound and there's only so much biting down on his lip can do.

Because he's ruining this. Fuck. He's ruining this and now Mind’s pretty face is twisting up in worry, and this is not at all what Steve wanted.

Not enough. Never enough.

---

He didn’t bank on making Harrington cry.

Half-way stuck - should he pull out? Press in? He knows the safe word. He’s fully able to use it — it’s not like he broke out the gags and restraints. This is mock love, not pain.

“Hey,” he whispers and pulls the man closer. Leaning in to kiss at the spaces he can reach, through the tears and twisting. “Don’t cry, princess. I’ve got you.”

The words he wishes he was given, he gives to his client. The tenderness in every motion, soft intimacy lain carefully like a veil over that pretty face. This is what love looks and feels like, right? He’s not sure, but this is what he hopes it’s like.

“It’s okay, baby.” If it was like this, he thinks, then —

“I got you.”

---

The thing is, Steve doesn't want to stop.

Sure, he wants to cover his face, wants to press at his eyes until the tears stop falling, wants to quiet the sobs falling unbidden from pink kissed lips.

But stopping is not something he wants.

Not even if that means he has to let this man, this person he barely knows but who has learned his body more intimately than any lover before, watch the shattered edges that hide under all the marble.

“S...S-Sorry, ” There’s a wryness to the curl of his lips, and everything looks blurry behind the sheen of tears that covers his eyes. “Just. P-Please.”

He's not sure what he is asking for anymore, though.

Please make me forget. Please don't stop. Please take away the pain.

Please, love me.

---

“Of course, Princess.” Billy pulls a smile onto his face and smooths the worry over. One hand slips from Harrington’s famous waist to cup his jaw. Thumb away some of those tears. Kiss away the rest.

All the love he never got, he gives away. From the empty garden of his chest, he digs for a fire he’s never known. Things he’s only seen in moves, heard in cafes, felt between the distances of picket fences and broken glass — this is what he comes back with. False diamonds to offer to an angel who hasn’t a clue either.

“Anything you want,” Billy whispers as he presses closer, pace steady still, but changed. Holding Steve in full now. The thrusts are shallow, but his arms are full and their hearts are only an inch apart.

Does it count? Is it right? What would an unearthly monster know of human love? What would an angel? He’s thinking too hard on this.

“Forever and always.”

---

But all things must come to an end.

Curled up on his side, trying to glue all the shattered pieces of himself back together while quiet tears slide down his cheeks, Steve wonders why did he ever think this was a good idea.

Because asking for fake love — So real. Too real. — doesn't change the fact that Jonathan and Nancy are engaged. It doesn't erase the fact that the next time he sees them he's gonna have to pretend like he's just happy for them, like the glass shards embedded in his heart do not exist and his chest doesn't ache with each soft smile they give each other.

At which point did they stop being able to see past his facades, he wonders.

Pathetic, Not enough. Never enough, are you Stevie?

With a shaky sigh, he wipes the remaining tears off his face and sits up. This is not Mind's fault in the slightest, not his fault that Steve is a pathetic mess who needs to buy fake love to try and get over his exes. So he pulls himself back together as best as he can and offers a weak smile.

"You know, you could make a really good acting career if you ever decided to leave this place."

---

That punches a laugh out of him before he can think better of it. Almost everyone who dances at the Auris fit that bill, even if half of them would do better in certain genres.

“Maybe.” Billy says, already knowing that his rap sheet has a stain and he’ll never be free of that. This is as close to stardom as he’ll get. “This has way more security than a bunch of Hollywood maybes, though.”

Harrington still hasn’t recovered. The walls don’t carry sound but they shake in the way that means someone violent is entertaining. Idly, he wonders who, and are they as wild as his night just was?

“Hope I see you around, dollface.” He itches to light up a cigarette. There’s no smoking allowed in the building though. He’d have to wander upwards to the roof for that and that’s too far right now.

“Tonight was fun.”

---

"Fun." He mutters, sliding off the bed onto shaky legs to search for his clothes. A wet chuckle leaves his lips, sounding a little wry. "Yeah, I guess we could call it that."

There's no need to say anything else after all. Not like he can say anything else. Hell, he can't even look Mind in the face right now, not if he wants his tentative defenses to hold up until he gets back home.

Home. Hah, if you could even call that sky loft a home.

So he gets dressed and offers a weak smile and a goodbye. Makes sure to tip higher than he usually would before leaving the building.

Resolves to try out dating again and visit the Auris less.

Too bad it's not that easy to get Mindflayer out of his mind.

[traincat]

if you dont mind i would love to hear your thoughts on how and why peter seems to be more fulfilled by lower paying jobs (i.e photography, teaching) rather than by high paying jobs in STEM

(Sorry for the wait, anon! I did get this first ask, as you can see, it’s just that sometimes I tend to hoard asks that I want to give long in-depth answers to and then they get buried.)

So I think to best answer this the first thing we have to do is look at Peter’s 616 employment history -- what jobs he’s had when and for approximately how long. So here we have a more or less definitive list -- I may have skipped over a few minor jobs that aren’t important in the long run of the character history, but for the most part this is accurate. For the sake of brevity I am not going to count things he’s done as Spider-Man that have earned him money, like a brief bodyguard stint or his occasional time with the Avengers, because this is really more about his identity as Peter Parker and how his civilian employment plays into his life as Spider-Man than about his life as Spider-Man.

Works for the Daily Bugle on and off, through a variety of positions from part time to salaried, from the age of 15 onwards. Primarily a photographer. How good of a photographer Peter actually is varies from writer to writer, but he remains unmatched in his ability to get certain shots ranging from ones of Spider-Man (duh) to particularly high risk environments (different duh). He also briefly worked for rival newspaper the Daily Globe, the Bugle’s main competitor. His position as a full time newspaper photographer is his most well known (and most consistent) job.

A TA in grad school at Empire State University. At this point in time he labeled himself as having “the wrong temperament” for teaching -- and I would personally say I think his stints teaching college are much less engaging than high school.

Published author. His book, Webs, a collection of his Spider-Man photography, was a major bestseller that sent him on a book tour around the country. I hesitated sticking this on here because it’s very tied into his work with the Bugle -- and he was still working for the Bugle when the book was published -- but I figured it was worth including for the novelty of the fact that Peter’s technically a best selling author/artist.

Peter worked as a scientist at Galannan Alternative Research for Immunization Development (GARID) in Portland after his clone Ben Reilly took over the identity of Spider-Man. Although often overlooked in discussions of Peter’s job history, I think his stint at GARID is important in part because it illustrates how much of Peter’s time being Spider-Man took up and how a job with flexible hours was necessary for that balancing act. When he was working at GARID, Peter wasn’t Spider-Man, so it wasn’t difficult for him to keep a position at a laboratory. 

I mean granted the GARID job didn’t last long and there was sort of a whole big mutated monster case going on with it but you know. Anyway he pretty quickly moved back to New York and started working for the Bugle again.

Peter’s next major job at a lab comes in another period where he’s supposed to have quit being Spider-Man. (Which he did, very temporarily, and then he very much didn’t. Anyway, you’re seeing the pattern here.) He briefly worked at Tricorp, a private brain trust. This is a really short-lived position, even as Peter’s science gigs go, because -- Spider-Man.

At this point things get dicey employment-wise as Peter heads into a weird period of canon where Mary Jane was presumed dead. She wasn’t! But everyone thought she was. It was weird. When MJ came back (and promptly left for LA, not that I blame her), Peter exited this period of limbo by becoming a science teacher at his old school, Midtown High. This is the main career, beside news photography, that I think he really shines in.

Civil War/One More Day/Brand New Day hit and completely tank the direction of Spider-Man history. Peter’s marriage is erased by the devil and also he’s not a high school teacher anymore, for some reason, even though nobody remembers he’s Spider-Man anymore which is the reason he initially lost the Midtown High job. Make it make sense. Anyway, in Marvel’s desperate scramble to take Spider-Man back to the unmarried basics, as if they even got new readers that way, Peter returned to photography. When Dexter Bennett bought the Bugle out from under JJJ while JJJ was sick, Peter began working for the newly minted “DB” as a tabloid photographer. It wasn’t great.

He also briefly at some point in here worked at a comic book store for like five minutes. Mostly he complained about people who read comic books and made jokes about how he doesn’t get along with the X-Men. 

Under Slott’s run, Peter began working at Horizon Labs. Slott had a pretty major problem with Peter’s genius not being “recognized enough” and constantly had him inventing new things, showing off, etc. 

Horizon Lab became Parker Industries under Otto Octavius when he bodyjacked Peter during Superior Spider-Man and made himself CEO. When Peter got his body back, he was still CEO. It was bad but Peter did tank the company on purpose so that Otto and also nazis couldn’t get their hands on it, which was sort of fun. 

Peter went back to work for the Bugle, but as their science editor, because Slott was still in charge and there was some weird commentary about photography not being an adult job. Which I think is pretty weird in a medium that’s very dependent on visual art. But okay.

Then Peter got fired because he was busted for plagiarism of Otto Octavius’ work... that Otto did himself... while he was in Peter’s body... and Peter couldn’t reveal this because then he’d have to explain... and maybe I hate comics. 

In MC2 he becomes a forensic scientist! I really like this for him actually. I think it combines his interests and experiences in a very thoughtful way. But I do want to note it’s after a Spider-Man career ending injury, so again there’s not a real conflict there between his work as Spider-Man and a career.

Peter I think is an especially interesting case in how his character ties into his employment history because one of the first things he does in his story is figure out how to make money, and he does this because the Parkers don’t have any. If Ben and May were comfortable -- even comfortable enough that their teenaged nephew was unaware of financial pressures -- Spider-Man’s story would be completely different. But Peter immediately feels he pressure to use his new powers to earn money, at first with brute strength. And what he says he’s going to do with his earnings is that he’s going to take care of Ben and May:

(Amazing Fantasy #15) So the concept of Peter as someone who is very aware of financial pressure and who is pretty explicitly linking money to support is present from the absolute beginning. But at the same time, there’s a kind of selfishness presented in him here -- he’s only going to take care of Ben and May. They’re the only ones he cares about here, because as he’s stated they’re the only ones who have ever “been kind” to him. Peter at the beginning of his story is very rooted in his anger and his bitterness, and it takes him losing Uncle Ben -- because it wasn’t Peter’s “job” to stop the burglar -- to get him to the point where he starts to be able to see beyond that.

Ben’s death also heightens the Parker’s financial pressures -- Ben is the primary earner in the household. (Aunt May in the original context of the early 1960s was most likely a homemaker, and as an older woman especially she wouldn’t be expected to have a job. But even moving the timescale up to a point where she would be expected as a woman to hold down a job, it’s important to note that early in Spider-Man canon Aunt May is depicted as being in very poor physical health.) While it’s not clear in the initial Spider-Man stories what Ben did, it’s clear that with his death whatever income the Parkers had coming in abruptly stops:

(ASM #1) This sets in concrete one of the central conflicts Peter and May have -- both of them lie to protect the other. Peter feigns being an ordinary boy in order to protect May from the stress of his secret life as Spider-Man, worried that she wouldn’t be strong enough to handle the danger he regularly puts himself in. But this is a learned behavior, and here we see that he most likely learned it from May: she doesn’t want him to worry about the very deep financial troubles they’re obviously in, so she pawns her jewelry, and she stresses to him the importance of his education. Again I have to note that there are some pretty significant social differences between the 1960s and today in regards to this story -- Betty Brant, for example, notes that she had to drop out of school and become a secretary because of her own family’s financial problems, something she’s ashamed of. So early Spider-Man is very rooted in money, class, education, and how those things intersect. I think it should be noted that the only early Spider-Man characters who are financially well-off are Liz, Gwen, and Harry. (We don’t know anything about Flash’s financial situation in early Spider-Man comics but retroactively we know his family situation is not well-off.) In high school, Liz’s father is a bigshot who owns a dining club, but later on the Allans experience financial hardship with Liz quite literally being on the streets when Peter reunites with her when he’s in college. Harry’s father is a rich businessman, but from the beginning he’s depicted as emotionally negligent, caring more about money than spending time with his son:

(ASM #40) “After all... I had a business to care of! Money was the most important thing of all! I had to get rich! I needed wealth... for that was the key to power!” So right away you have this link between wealth, corruption, and negligence. Norman’s pursuit of wealth is his given reason for his neglect of Harry. Later on we’d learn that Norman’s father was also abusive and that that abuse formed Norman’s ideas about power and wealth. (Spider-Man! It’s about cycles of abuse!) There’s a very contrast between Norman’s attitudes here and the Parkers loving (but poor) household. Gwen is the only exception here -- she and her father are depicted as comfortable, most likely edging into wealthy, although on nowhere the level the Osborns have been elevated to. But compared to Peter, Flash, and Mary Jane especially -- all from poor households, with MJ and Flash’s fathers both being abusive -- Gwen’s home situation is the picture of stability, both in terms of economic status and in terms of her loving and very present father.

My goal in outlining all of this isn’t to say that Spider-Man’s message is definitively “money is bad” because I don’t think it is. I think as a series Spider-Man is very aware of the comfort that money can provide. But I think there is a frequent message about excess in Spider-Man -- excess power, excess wealth. As Norman says above, in his eyes, money is the key to power. With great power, comes great responsibility. In Norman hoarding and abusing his wealth, he abuses his power. If he provides for Harry, it is solely through money -- there is no love or devotion in Norman’s money-focused world. And I think that’s important when you look at where Peter starts in his story, before Uncle Ben’s death. He’s going to use his powers to make a lot of money and he’s going to provide for Ben and May but he’s not going to care about the world outside of that. I think one of the interesting things about Peter -- and this is where Slott’s run especially fails the character -- is that he’s not interesting in getting rich. He’d like to be comfortable, for sure -- he’d like to have enough money to not have worry about it, to not have the need to hustle impede what he can do as Spider-Man, to be able to take care of his family. (And there’s some machismo stuff linked in here for him too -- in the early days of their marriage the fact that Mary Jane earns much more than him is something he struggles with.) But he doesn’t care about being rich. He doesn’t care about the money; he cares about the support that the money would bring. 

That feels like a simple statement but I think it’s actually a really big distinction, especially when you’re analyzing a character. And I think it’s because Peter understands that value that it makes him so empathetic to others who have financial struggles. One of my favorite short self-contained Spider-Man stories is called Windfall, from Marvel Fanfare #42, where a mixup with a check embroils Peter in the personal affairs of a bank teller, a young single mother who is fired from her job ultimately because she refused the advances of her boss. Peter gets her her job back -- through blackmailing the boss for his other sexual affairs, which some people might think is immoral of him, but I think really speaks to Peter’s understanding of how the greater world works, and what he’s prepared to do to get bigger justice. But more importantly he uses his own money to pay the young woman’s rent, and he does it in a way where she never even knows it’s him. Because he understands her situation, the way someone who had grown up comfortable never could. And that understanding I think puts him a place where it’s more important for him to both keep that understanding and maintain that ability to act relatively freely, in the way that bigger, more prestigious positions in scientific fields might restrict him. There’s a reason he keeps getting fired from these scientific positions and it’s not that he can’t get them, because we can see from his employment history very clearly that he can. It’s because the freedom to act as Spider-Man and what he can do as Spider-Man is ultimately more important to him.

And while high school teacher is my number one favorite profession Peter has ever had, I think that his position as a newspaper photographer is also very important to the character’s history, in part because the Bugle is such a big part of his life and the connections he’s made but also because the Daily Bugle itself is important. I think it’s interesting to note that two of the biggest superheroes of all time from both of the big companies -- Spider-Man from Marvel and Superman from DC -- have had long running journalism jobs, Peter as a photographer and Clark as a reporter. I don’t think I really have to go into a whole thing about how good journalists are so important and why it matters that we have these incredibly famous mythic figures that are positioned in the roll of journalists specifically. But I do think it is important to Peter that he’s put in that position as someone who cares about uncovering the truth. So ultimately I think what I mean when I say Peter is more fulfilled by his jobs as a photojournalist and as a high school teacher than by his comparatively more high paying stints working as a scientist in a lab is that Peter gets the most fulfillment out of careers where he can actively see, day by day, that what he’s doing is helping people, and that it’s a very direct line from him to the people he’s helping. His efforts can’t be twisted, they can’t be used for other purposes the way they can within a larger organization. He has a line of control in what he can do to help other people. It’s like how Spider-Man functions best as a street level hero: what he does best is saving and helping individual people, on a case by case basis. And you can turn around and demonstrate that in his civilian life best in jobs where he gets to directly interact with people. And ultimately to Peter making that difference is more important than a better salary.

(Marvel Knights Spider-Man #9)

[jadoue1999]

The X-Men and the member they lost - Chapter 4

Summary: This chapter references the 6th episode of WandaVision and the events from Wanda's point of view in my previous story in chapter 2-3-4. I recommend reading those before continuing, but the best would be to read the entire story. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

Previous parts: Chapter 1 , Chapter 2 , Chapter 3 , Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, 

Chapter 4: Regrets

The episode continued with both the twins talking directly to the camera. Erik frowned at this unusual situation, was this how television worked past the eighties? Billy was dressed up as some sort of magician and was talking about Halloween. The two brothers argued about the true meaning of the holiday, one saying something about being someone else for a day and the other one saying it was all about candies and scaring people. Erik smirked, from the little time he had been with Peter, he, too, would have probably said the same thing had he been asked. Speaking of him, he had yet to appear. Thankfully, he didn’t have to wait long as the twins moved to the living room, where he was laying on the couch, sleeping. The metal bender was still feeling uneasy about the blonde hair. The boys talked, the one wearing the cape seemed suspicious of him. They argued about waking him up, but he beat them to it.

“Blood is thicker than water, I show you!” Peter screamed as he sped off the couch. The twins yelled and started pacing around the couch as Peter used his speed to circle around the sofa. Erik smirked despite himself, it might have been a pretend, but the speedster really did seem to have a good time with his fake nephews. The scene cut to Wanda going down the stairs wearing a costume she qualified as a fortune teller. Peter watched her, unimpressed.

“Wow, that is so...”

“Rad!”

“Lame”

He frowned, that was a little strange, and rude. Charles probably felt his confusion since he turned to him. His gaze was enough to inform him that he too found the line strange. It switched to a reference to their childhood to which the redhead seemed confused about. But that didn’t make sense, she had casted him as Pietro; surely, he would have his memories as well? The husband walked down the stairs wearing a frankly ridiculous costume. Peter also made fun of him by trying to guess what he was dressed as. Vision walked to his wife and seemed to challenge her authority once again. He quickly moved on and pointed out how Wanda hadn’t really talked about her brother before. The scene cut to him and the twins playing games. Then the android decided to go off on his own, to which Peter stepped in.

“Don't sweat it, sis. I got the old XY chromosome. Uncle P to the rescue, uh?”

Raven spoke up at the strange line, “is- is he referring to the X gene? I know it doesn’t make any sense since it doesn’t seem to exist in this universe, but it’s so specific...”

Erik agreed with the shapeshifter, while it technically made sense in the sitcom word; it was way too specific to just be a throw away line. Was Peter conscious to a certain degree? He secretly hoped not, he must have been suffering greatly if he was.

Peter then asked about balloons and shaving cream, something that had apparently happened at the manor before because Charles sighed suddenly in exasperation. He was vaguely whispering about the clean up it took after one of his pranks. Peter and the long-haired twin sped off at Wanda’s complaint about their lack of costumes, coming back with matching ones and spiky hair. From what Erik could gather, they were probably dressed as runners, their hair up perhaps meant that they were going fast? He had no idea; he had never really dressed up for Halloween before.

The scene cut to the neighborhood where everyone was out and trick or treating. He had never seen so many town resident active at the same time, and now there were children. Erik noted with curiosity that the ratio parent to child didn’t really make sense; not enough kids were out for the number of adults present. He suddenly had an idea.

“Charles,” he said, turning to the man, “with that many residents, perhaps Wanda’s hold is weakened; can you read any of their mind?”

The telepath put a hand to his head in concentration and stared at the screen for a few seconds. His gaze didn’t falter as he desperately tried to make contact with the poor townspeople. After a moment, he shook his head.

“There’s something blocking me from seeing into anyone’s mind; I’m betting Wanda has something to do with it.”

Erik sighed in defeat and turned back to the screen, the children were off, and the redhead was questioning Peter.

“You're testing me.” He told her accusingly, she widened her eyes at the accusation, apparently not fond of being so easily read.

“No, I'm not.”

Peter raised his hand in surrender, showing he didn’t blame her. “Hey, it's cool. I know I look different.”

“Why do you... look different?”

Erik stared at the screen anxiously, Wanda was definitely aware that something was wrong. How could Peter answer anything that wouldn’t sound suspicious? He had always been quick to find something to say, hopefully he would still have it, even mind controlled.

Peter tilted his head, acting nonchalant. “You tell me. I mean, if I found Shangri-La, I wouldn't wanna be reminded of the past either.”

Whatever that place was, he had never heard of it, but the context made it seem like a perfect place without remorse. The children came back, asking for more candies and Peter suggested to use superspeed to be more efficient. That was... strange to say the least. He was running with the boys without worrying about whiplash, they were holding on to his belt. They really seemed happy, like any uncle and his nephews. Slight worry crept into his chest as he noticed that his speed now showed up on camera; something it never did before. Was he slowing down for the sake of the show? Also, there was a little blue lingering behind him. Raged filled Erik as he realized that Wanda had changed the aspect of his speed to match her late brother’s. She had erased his name, his hair and now his speed; was there something this woman couldn’t and wouldn’t do to fulfill her fantasy world? 

She went to talk to the neighbor on the left, Herb if he remembered well. It turned out that Vision wasn’t actually on duty, which meant he had broken out of her control for now. That assumption was right, the next scene showed the android walking through the neighborhood, feeling uneasy about his surroundings. He smiled to some passerby as he noticed a couple putting up decorations. Except they were not.

“Is this a common occurrence?” He questioned his friend. Both adults were stuck in a loop, the woman was in the process of hooking up a ghost, but she lowered her arm before she ever reached the fishing line. The husband in the back keep picking up and putting down a bucket.

“No, it isn’t,” said Charles. He frowned as a tear rolled down the woman’s cheek, ”they are trapped in their minds, but unable to do anything. Wanda is sidelining them because they’re not useful to her right now, but they have to keep acting as they would be if she were there.”

Erik stared at the wall, deep in thoughts. They were all suffering, that meant... “Is Peter stuck in his mind as well?” The telepath was silent, but it was enough to confirm his fears. “I wish he could have told me earlier, perhaps I would have been enough to save him from this fate.”

Charles shook his head with a serious face. “Don’t say this, old friend, even I did not sense anything amiss the night of his disappearance. As for knowing earlier, Peter didn’t tell anyone other than Raven. She’s the one that told me.”

He looked at the screen where Vision was still observing his surroundings with discomfort. “Watching this woman puppet my son on her show just serves as a reminder that I missed nearly thirty years of his life. And even now that I’m aware of his existence, I can’t do anything to save him from this nightmare.”

Charles stopped him from saying anything more as he put a comforting hand on his shoulder. “Erik, Peter is a very secretive person. And as much as he rambles like his life depends on it; we never knew his real name or the fact that he had a twin sister.”

He had to give it to his friend, Peter hadn’t really spoken much about his past to anyone. But had he been aware that he had a son, could he have made a difference?

The screen now showed Vision walking away and it cut to a commercial. Erik didn’t watch much as he was contemplating what the episode had been so far. He had seen horrible things in his life, but Wanda’s little perfect life was unsettling. There was no record of how she made it in any of the files, it just appeared out of nowhere. The only other person he had seen displaying a power that was close to what the redhead was doing was, ironically, Jean; the other redhead he knew at the mansion. He had seen her unleashing hell to destroy En Sabah Nur back at Cairo and had been impressed since.

He was pulled out of his thoughts as Kurt panicked at whatever was going on at the television. The little boy was slowly decomposing. He wasn’t sure was had happened previously, but he watched in disbelief as the boy’s cheeks hollowed out and his eyes slowly disappeared. Then all that was left was a skeleton as the screen showed a picture of a yogurt brand.

‘Yo-Magic! The snack for survivors!’

What was that commercial? What did it even mean? Was there a threat looking to consume Wanda’s magic or was it a metaphor for what was happening to all the citizens? Everything in this show seemed to have a double meaning. He really should have paid attention. The screen switched to Wanda, Peter and the boys. They were walking in front of a theater that showed movies that hadn’t come out yet. Well, except maybe parents trap but he doubted it was the original one. Peter was complaining about having to return the candies and Wanda was teasing him about being a bad influence. The speedster turned to her, offended.

“I'm just trying to do my part, okay?” Erik frowned, his part? Could he be aware about his predicament? If so, why not try to escape? Or perhaps she wasn’t able to completely subdue him, and he ended up being casted as someone that knew too much for his own good. There was no telling what was going in the speedster’s head. Peter continued his rant, explaining his purpose, “Come to town unexpectedly, create tension with the brother-in-law, stir up trouble with the rugrats, and ultimately give you grief. I mean, that's what you wanted, isn't it?”

His remark earned a general frown from the viewers in the room, what did she want?

Wanda narrowed her eyes at him in suspicion, “What happened to your accent?”

Peter didn’t let her get to him as he snapped back, “What happened to yours?” That caught her off guard, though Erik couldn’t think why. Perhaps she was supposed to have an accent? Her files did say that she was from this Sokovia place in Europe.

Kurt suddenly spoke up, “I know Peter can be sarcastic, but he’s being very rude. He’s never like that normally; is that his role or is it him being conscious and trying to hide it?”

The teen had a point. The speedster was hyper and excited, but he wasn’t rude. The lines he was forced to say definitely didn’t sound like something he’d just blurt out at someone he was supposed to consider family. Peter continued talking about being shot for no reasons and hearing her voice calling to him. That was definitely the other brother’s memories, that was for certain. Erik wasn’t sure how to feel about this. Did it mean that his son would now be stuck with a double set of memories trapped in his head? Was he torn between two versions of himself? He couldn’t dwell on his questions as the children came running back. “They've got full-size candy bars a few blocks up. Mom, can we go?” Tommy was suddenly gone in a blur and back in an instant, with candy bars in his hand. He looked proud as he exclaimed, “Next stop, Cavity Town!”

The excitement on Peter’s face was something that made Erik smile. He found himself wishing that the circumstances were different, perhaps Peter could have reacted the same way to a student. The way his eyes gleamed up and his mouth turned into a wide grin seemed so genuine, so much like Peter. “Right on, little dude! Chip off the old Maximoff block. You've got super speed!”

Wanda and Peter looked at each other with pride in their eyes. If Erik hadn’t known better, he truly could have believed that they were siblings. They simply felt right together. He watched as Tommy broke into superspeed, running all around the place as Wanda slowly began to get more serious. Peter, though, was grinning like a mad man and repeatedly nodding in approval as the mini speedster raced through the street. Their fun was cut short as Wanda grabbed her son, stopping him abruptly. He frowned at her movement, if there was one truth about Peter, it was that once he started, he couldn’t be stopped by anyone. He was simply too fast. It was because of his superspeed, no one could touch him. It had to be the same for Tommy. How could she even see the young speedster in the first place? Let alone being able to grab him without any whiplash. Wanda then warned them to not go past Ellis Avenue. From her tone, he had to assume that it was the end of the barrier.

Raven turned to Charles, “he has superspeed, is he a mutant?”

The professor continued to look at the screen. “By how it manifested so suddenly, we have to assume that they are. The real question is, did Wanda steal mutant children from our dimension or are those children her own?”

The next few scenes were unexpected to say the least. Vision had found the dreaded Avenue and realized that no one was moving. He switched to a futuristic looking suit and flew in the air. The voices of the residents were echoing in the screen. Vision spotted a lone car, which ended up being Agnes’. She wasn’t moving either, that was unsettling since the woman usually was always so full of life. The robot did his best to question her, but she seemed barely aware of her surroundings.

“How can she even move at all? No one else is,” chimed in Raven.

That... was a valid question. Perhaps the fact that she was usually so close to Wanda gave her a slight immunity against the end of the barrier? He didn’t have time to tell his idea, Vision suddenly woke up the neighbor. It didn’t help much though, she confirmed that it was Wanda who controlled them and then started freaking out. He put her back under the spell and she drove away. The scene cut away as he was nearing the barrier.

Peter and Wanda were walking through the straw maze and sat on one of straw bundles. They talked a little about their parents and how she truly was living her best life. Then Peter pulled a face that was very unlike him and started questioning her. That made no sense, he was pushing for information Wanda should have known. Was there something else in this town talking through his son? She looked frightened for a moment, but Billy ran to her, screaming about their dying father. He was a telepath. Both twins apparently had mutations.

‘Don’t sweat it, sis. It’s not like your dead husband can die twice!’

This remark greatly angered Wanda and her eyes glowed red as she blasted him into nearby decorations. She turned to her son and made him focus on his claim. Judging by the screaming outside of the base, Vision had gone outside the town and the twin sensed it.

The broadcast suddenly cut off.

An alarm blared through the base, ringing loud enough to feel the vibration. Shouts outside of the bunker quickly made them aware of the situation. The barrier was expanding. The three other people with him were quickly picking up their stuff, but Erik couldn’t move. She had blasted his son away, like he was nothing. Was he dead? He hadn’t moved at all, he hoped he was just unconscious. Charles was grabbing his arm, telling him to snap out of it. The world suddenly caught up to him, they were in danger, the barrier was expanding. They had to get away.

He got to his feet, trying desperately to not think about Peter and the pain he had to be in. They ran out of the bunker; the barrier was already beginning to move towards the base. Soldiers were scrambling around, trying to get into cars and escape their upcoming fate. No one was paying attention to them, so Charles turned to the teenager.

“Kurt, you have to get us out of here,” the young man was frozen in place, staring at the approaching red wall. The professor pulled his arm, “Kurt!”

The blue mutant snapped out of his trance and told them to hold on to him. He closed his eyes in concentration, but they didn’t move. He opened his eyes in fear before closing them and trying again. “I- I can’t!” He panicked, “I’m sorry. This is my fault; I can’t do it!”

Raven gave him a reassuring smile and encouraged him to try again. He nodded and concentrated once more. After a few agonizing seconds, the world melted into a puff of smoke and they reappeared a mile away from their previous spot. Erik felt a nausea similar to the one he felt back when Peter broke him out. He looked around with a smirk. They had done it; the boy had succeeded. They looked at each other and laughed in relief, Kurt had saved them. They would live to fight another day, they were- they were-

Not far enough.

The red wall was still moving towards them with increasing speed. There was no escape now, the teen was too exhausted to try moving them again. He grabbed Charles’ hand and braced for impact. The telepath warned them to try to hold on to whatever they deemed was their story. Perhaps they would be able to remain unaffected if they could block their minds from Wanda’s control. He quickly followed his friend’s advice and focused on his life and the reason he was here.

His name was Erik Lehnsherr, he was a mutant, he had lost his family because of the Nazis and he had traveled to a different universe to find his son, Peter.

The wall crashed over them, he felt everything around him pulsing.

His name was Erik Lehnsherr, he was a mutant, he had lost his family and he had traveled to a different universe to find his son, Peter.

He felt Charles slipping away from beside him.

His name was Erik Lehnsherr, he was a mutant, and he had to find his son, Peter.

Raven kept calling for him, telling him to hold on.

His name was Erik Lehnsherr, and he had a son.

The teen he had been traveling with kept apologizing, but he wasn’t sure why.

His name was Erik Lehnsherr.

The woman had gone silent.

His name was... Erik.

He was alone, had he always been alone?

His name was...

It was...

What was his name?

***

Notes: Props to anyone who can tell me what was my reference for Erik going into the Hex (Not Marvel) Thank you for reading, reviews are always appreciated! Next chapter: Charles the Xtraordinary has a visitor

[seven-sapphire-stones]

Rambling About Octane

The limitations of the community comics make certain things a little difficult to keep up with at times, but even so, today's comic really put a whole lot into perspective.

Firstly, it really shows how much thought Eduardo has put into his plans- Plans which haven't even been explained.

This alone speaks in volumes about Eduardo Silva's true character. Not only is he ensuring no one catches wind of his heinous acts or ever captures him, but he's willing to put his son in the spotlight. However, it wasn't in the sense of putting finger prints on anything or falsifying evidence, but he knows how Octavio reacts.

As horrible as it is to say, Tavi is a coward. Eduardo knew for a fact that he wouldn't tell Che, not only because he considered it fun, as he himself mentions;

But because he's also because he was afraid of being someone as awful as the man he called "father."

The way I percieve Tavi handling things is like this;

"My father never cared for me, so I won't care for him. But now this awful information is surfacing, which could endanger many people, and even kill them. So, do I make this my own business when it isn't, or do I listen to Che and ignore everything? Just like when that head mentioned our parents..."

"Is it better to pretend not to care, or is it better if I do? What can I do to help? Am I a bad person for ignoring this? Am I a bad person for not telling anyone sooner?"

Essentially, he painted himself into a corner. Just like Eduardo knew he would. And when he calls him out on it, he can't even face his best friend. Because it's true.

And yet... There's something deeper for them.

This is why I dislike the limitation of being restricted to four panels. Those who aren't familiar with Ajay and Tavi's prior relationship, or who simply don't understand it, would see this as Lifeline being stubborn. Refusing to sell out someone she considers a friend. And that may be true, but it goes far deeper.

Ajay and Tavi only had each other for the longest time. Their friendship evolved into a connection that made them practical siblings. Ajay knows Tavi, far better than Eduardo does. She knows he was afraid. She knows he wouldn't have wanted to hurt people.

By the way, props to you, Caity. Even with the four panel limit, you managed to create a single panel that speaks louder than words.

Absolutely stunning.

So much emotion in one image. Upon closer inspection, you can see Tavi wince, wince away from his friend. He knows he messed up, probably worse than he ever has, and that fear that Ajay might actually decide that she's better off without him makes him dodgy. And his best friend, the woman he likely looks up to, the girl who became his only family, stands proud in the face of danger, all while he cowers in the dark.

He's guilty, he's humiliated. As Ajay points out, he doesn't want to hurt people. He doesn't want to be like his dad. He was caught in the midst of Eduardo's horrible plans.

But even so, that doesn't necessarily erase what he had done. Hes still got a lot of growing up to do, he's still got to realize that he can't play pretend in a fantasy world everyday.

The Icarus brought a lot of turmoil for people, and Tavi will have to come to terms with that. He and Ajay probably have a lot to talk about, but more importantly than anything,

He doesn't have to be alone anymore.

[rainywritingsx]

Scenario: Beelzebub and Asmodeus cheating on their S/O

Request: Can I get a cheating angst for either beelzebub or Asmodeus please? Sad ending as well please🥺💖

Okay so,,,, I was only gonna do Asmo BUT then an idea came to my mind which is veryyy different from it so I decided to do both :D This is my first time writing for obey me aaaaa i’m so nervous. I’m also not experienced with angst buuuttt I hope it’s still okay, hopefully I’ll get better as time passes! Also, Asmo’s scenaro contained way more anger than I intended to but I didn’t think it would be good to change so,,,, Asmo sweetheart I’m so sorry :(. Anywayyy, feel free to give me feedback if there’s something I can work on ^^ Anywaaaayy onto the scenarios, I hope you enjoy!!

Tip jar ^^

warnings: angst angst A N G S T :),,, I really went off at Asmo I’m sorry bby ily :(

words: 2003 (in total)

Beelzebub

“He would never do such a thing.” “He’s head over heels for you.” “Beel is as loyal as a puppy.” “Man, I’ve never seen him so in love.”

They thought he loved them.That nothing would happen to break what they had built.

But they were wrong. So, so wrong.

And now here they were, in his room, him naked on the bed alone after y/n yelled for the person that was here too to get out. The sheets weren’t covering much of Beelzebub, and he was holding onto them as if it were his last breath.

There was a silence. Way too long for Beelzebub’s liking. But he had no idea what to say right now. He knew nothing he would say could fix this. He felt horrible, absolutely horrible. He never wanted to hurt them like this, he had vowed to himself that he wouldn’t but he broke his own promise.

“I can’t believe this.” Y/n croaked out, breaking the silence as tears filled their eyes. Beelzebub’s heart dropped to his chest upon hearing the heartbreaking tone and seeing their glossy eyes. and Y/n could tell, they knew that he felt bad. but they didn’t care. They were the one who was cheated on, not him. He had no right to use any self-pity right now.

“Y-y/n-“

“No, Beelzebub. I don’t want to hear it.” Their tone was now incredibly sharp, every word piercing through Beelzebub like a knife stabbing him. The demon visibly flinched upon hearing them say his full name. He wasn’t used to it, and he didn’t like hearing it this way.

He wanted to scream. Cry. Fall to the floor. Tell them he loved them, that he was sorry, and that he would never do it again. But really, if he did it once, what held him back from doing it again? How could he prove to them that he’d be loyal this time?

He didn’t want to lose them, but he knew that they wouldn’t stay. Of course they wouldn’t. Not after what he did.

“I-I understand that you don’t love me anymo-“

“I don’t love you?” Y/n repeated in disbelief. A humourless chuckle escaped their lips. “I don’t love you?” They said again, shaking their head.

“How can you say that? How can you say that I don’t love you? I was always here for you, I cherished all of our moments together, I appreciate you as a person. Of course I love you. That doesn’t just go away because you cheated on me, Beelzebub.” Y/n said, and while in any other situation these words would’ve caused Beel’s heart to race, now he just felt sad. They loved him so much, and this was how he returned the favour?

“But what did go away,” they spoke up again. Y/n stopped for a moment to take a deep breath, not wanting to cry in front of him right now. They closed their eyes for a moment, before opening them again. “was my trust in you. I love you, but I can’t be with you anymore.” He wanted to cry. He wanted to hug them, beg them to stay, tell them that they would do better. But would he? Would he really? Was he never going to make that mistake again? This was the first time that he ever felt so much guilt at once.

“I hope that you realise how much things like this hurt the people around you. And I really hope that the next person who will be with you isn’t going to get hurt like this too.” Y/n sighed softly. Beelzebub wasn’t a bad person. they knew that. they were surprised that they managed to stay so calm right now.

But really, they weren’t feeling a bit of anger. Just sadness, disappointment, confusion. HOw could this happen? How could he do this? were they naive for thinking he would never cheat on them?

“I know you aren’t a bad person.” Y/n said as they looked at Beel, whose eyes were practically begging Y/n to stay. They shook their head as their eyes never looked away from his. “But that doesn’t mean I can just forgive and forget like that…” Slowly, Y/n’s feet made its way towards the door of the room.

“W-wait Y/n, no.” for a moment they stopped. They knew they wouldn’t be able to avoid him forever as both of them resided in the Devildom. But they really just wanted time for themselves right now.

“Beelzebub, I really wish the best for you in the future” They said “And I don’t hate you. I’m just… really hurt. I need some time alone right now.” and that was the last thing Y/n said before kleaving the room.

Beelzebub slowly lowered his head, quiet sobs escaping his mouth as shoulders shook slightly. He had really lost them. How could he mess up so bad? He wanted to follow them, apologise, beg for them to give him one more chance.

But Y/n deserved better than that. They were too kind for him, the fact that they didn’t even hate him shattered  his heart even more.

Y/n walked through the halls of the Devildom, tears threatening to spillf from their eyes. Their footsteps were quick and their gaze was lowered. They still couldn’t believe it. How could Beel, their dear Beel, hurt them like that?

They didn’t notice Mammon, who had just left Lucifer’s room and looked like he had just gotten a long lecture from the eldest. Mammon did take notice of Y/n though, and immediately he saw the tears.

“Oi, Y/n, what’s wrong? Why are you cryin’?” he asked and wanted to stop them, but Y/n ignored him and kept walking. They almost ran to their room and locked the door before letting their body fall on the bed. And that’s when they finally let it all out. It still felt surreal. They gave him their heart, but he just shattered it as if it was nothing.

Asmodeus (baby I’m so sorry)

Fury. Disappointment. Sadness. Anger.

None of these words could explain all of the emotions Y/n was feeling right now. Nothing, no words, no sounds, no actions, one of that could properly express what went through their mind. They had never felt an emotion like this, but they knew that they hated it and wanted it to go away this instant.

Nobody said a word. Not Y/n, who wasn’t able the find the right words. Nor did Asmodeus, who was at a loss for words, too. So they waited. Y/n waited for him to say something. They just stared at him. it was as if their eyes told him “Go on, I’m waiting.” and it drew the demon insane because he just had no idea what to say.

With every second that passed by, Y/n slowly started losing their patience. He really wasn’t saying a thing? He had the nerve to commit such foolish actions, yet he couldn’t say a single word to them? Really? Was he the victim here? Were they supposed to feel bad?

“So?” Y/n crossed their arms, holding back tears as they refused to lose eye contact with him. They could tell he was uncomfortable. Good, they thought to themself. He should feel that way. If he wanted to cheat on them, they should deal with everything caused by it.

A dry laugh escaped their lips, making Asmodeus flinch in surprise as he clutched the bedsheets in his hands.

“You really aren’t saying anything?” their voice was way too calm for his liking. He knew that at any moment, if he said the wrong thing, they would explode.

But Asmodeus knew that nothing he’d say could fix the situation. He knew that no matter what he’d say, it wouldn’t undo his unfaithful actions. It wouldn’t erase the pain he caused them to feel. It wouldn’t change the fact that his and Y/n’s relationship was on the brink of falling apart right now. And he felt horrible for it, he had never felt so ashamed, so disgusted with himself.

“Don’t you fucking dare give me that look, Asmodeus. I’m the one who was cheated on, not you.” They spat. How could he act all pitiful now? He looked like a puppy who had just been hit by his owner, while he was the one who had done the damage.

“Darling I’m so-”

“Quit the damn pet names. Don’t you dare call me darling when you were fucking someone else seconds ago.” Y/n’s voice rose as they continued speaking, to the point where Asmodeus thought that his other brothers in the Devildom could hear him.

“Why, Asmodeus, why?!” Y/n was yelling at this point as furious tears escaped their eyes. “Why the fuck did you do this? Was it fun, was it exciting? Was it one of your many fantasies? Was that why you dated me in the first place? Huh? Why are you all quiet now? You were pretty damn vocal when you were sleeping with that person. You loved every fucking second of it!” The tears were rolling down their cheeks as they walked up to the bed, staring down at Asmodeus who felt very small right now.

“Was I nothing but a toy to you?! Did you think I just wanted to have ‘fun’ with you? That that was all I wanted in our relationship? I fucking did everything for you, Asmodeus! And you just fucked some stranger you saw at the academy today?” Y/n shook their head and laughed humorlessly.

“I should’ve known, huh? Of course you would cheat on me.” Asmodeus’ heart cracked at that, because he knew exactly what they were talking about. That damn curse, sin, whatever it was, he despised it right now. But even if that was what drove him to betray his s/o, he was aware that it didn’t mean Asmodeus was not responsible for this at all.

“I hate you.” Y/n said, their voice quiet and Asmo swore he could hear something break at those words. “I hate you! I hate you, Asmodeus! I despise you more than anyone or anything else!” They were yelling now, their hands shaky and balled into fists.

“I regret meeting you, I regret talking to you, I regret kissing you, I regret being your s/o! At the end, all you did was betray me and throw me to the side as if I’m nothing and I detest you for that!!” Y/n’s voice cracked, but it didn’t take away the anger they felt nor did it weaken the power of their words. All Asmodeus could do was listen as he still tried to find the right words to say to the person whom he had hurt so badly.

“I fucking hate you!! Go fuck whoever was in your bed before I got here, I don’t want to speak to you ever again. I don’t care if we live in the same house, I’ll do whatever I can to ignore you. I hate you so, so much, Asmo!” those were the last words Y/n said before storming off. Despite them being human, the loud stomps made it sound as if it was a demon that was angrily walking through the halls.

Asmodeus looked down, realization of what had just occurred finally hitting him. And that was where he broke. A soft sob escaped his mouth as the feeling of regret overtook his body. His shoulders started shaking as he hid his face in the blankets, shaking his head in disbelief. How could he have done this? He knew Y/n already had a rough time with his overall flirty attitude, but they were nothing but patient all this time and he just took advantage of their kindness., He was the lowest of the low. And he knew that he deserved everything that would come his way now.

[dovebuffy92]

https://www.fanbolt.com/115324/lucifer-season-6-review/

The television series Lucifer developed by Tom Kapinos receives a bittersweet ending in Season 6.

First, there are beautiful moments like Mazikeen’s “Maze” (Lesley-Ann Brandt) and Eve’s (Inbar Lavi) wedding. Then there are bitter moments; for example, Lucifer Morningstar (Tom Ellis) returning to Hell, leaving behind his family, including the love of his life, former Detective Chloe Decker (Lauren German), and stepchild Trixie Espinoza (Scarlett Estevez).

In all, Lucifer Season 6 is a mixed bag but the perfect ending for the main character.

Maze and Trixie

Maze and Trixie’s friendship is only slightly referenced in the final season, erasing the relationship that helped the demon evolve. In Lucifer Season Two Episode “Trick or Treat?”, Maze created a President of Mars costume for the then eight-year-old. Trixie’s dream career is to be President of Mars, which she told Maze about in the first season.

Trixie also accepted Maze, even with her full demon face on during Halloween. For a long time, the only person the demon truly liked on Earth was Trixie. Maze taught her how to fight when she was babysitting. She took Trixie’s advice about important issues. The two are best friends. But after the third season, Maze and now thirteen-year-old Trixie are barely on screen together.

This season, the only reference to their close bond is Trixie telling her secret angel sister Rory (Brianna Hildebrand) that she is Maze’s best friend. Maze and Trixie also gesture to each other when the demon bride walks down the aisle.

I understand that as a recurring character, Trixie can’t interact with everybody, and there have been fewer episodes to play with since the show moved to Netflix. Still, I wish Kapinos and the writers could have ended the show with Trixie advising Maze on her wedding jitters or a sparring session.

Lucifer Season 6 Explores Different Visual Aesthetics

Lucifer Season 6 explores different visual aesthetics, easing tension-filled moments in the plot. The best example is in “Yabba Dabba Do Me,” where animation brings humor to a serious quest. Lucifer believes that he will feel ready to become God when he can help somebody he hates. He and Chloe fly down to Hell to help the murderer Jimmy Barnes (John Pankow) from Lucifer’s pilot episode.

Before opening a portal door, Lucifer warns his girlfriend that Jimmy’s hellscape will be horrific because he drove the music producer insane. Instead, the couple enters a Hanna-Barbera-style cartoon universe. Both Lucifer and Chloe turn into cartoons with no genitals and eyes that can bounce out of their sockets.

Now, the old-fashioned animation is not just a fun gag but a clue about what Jimmy truly desires. When Jimmy was a troubled young boy, he used to watch Hanna-Barbera cartoons to comfort himself. The dead music producer was watching them the day his musician mother abandoned him.

Lucifer can’t take Jimmy out of Hell, but he comforts the tortured man by trapping him in a time loop. For the rest of the time, Jimmy watches cartoons with his mother right before she leaves. The viewer, like Jimmy, can’t help but giggle watching a Hanna-Barbera cartoon though the storytelling technique moves the plot forward.

Happiness Only In Death

Many human characters don’t find self-actualization or happiness until after they die, which I find troubling. Now I know that Lucifer is an urban fantasy television show, not a serious drama, but it conforms to problematic Judeo-Christian beliefs. Beliefs like humans need to live a hard life, so they go to paradise when they die.

Nobody should or needs to feel joyful twenty-four-seven, but there is no need to feel tortured most of the time. Therapist Dr. Linda Martin (Rachael Harris) and forensic scientist Ella Lopez (Aimee Garcia) live happily. But Linda’s son Charlie Martin is half-archangel, and the father of her child, archangel Amenadiel (D.B Woodside), becomes God.

Ella Lopez is the only main human character with no romantic (former or current) affiliations with an immortal that lives fully. Dan Espinoza (Kevin Alejandro) doesn’t get his forever after with Charlotte Richards (Tricia Helfer) until they’re both in Heaven. Chloe and Lucifer don’t get their happy ending until she dies, then is flown down to Hell to be his partner.

The Love Story in Lucifer Season 6

Chloe and Lucifer are the television show’s sweetest love story, but it still seems unfair that they spend decades apart. Lucifer could have been the Devil and still visited his family, but he promised Rory he wouldn’t. Rory’s logic on why Lucifer needs to isolate himself from his family is never explained, making the ending feel unfair to both the audience and the characters.

Lucifer Morningstar’s mental health journey ends on a high note, with the Devil finding his true purpose. The whole series starts with Lucifer vacationing in Los Angles because he felt bored constantly torturing souls in Hell. However, he stayed in Los Angeles because of his feelings for the detective. Helping Chloe solve murders was fun for Lucifer but not his true purpose. Chloe loves catching criminals, proven by the fact that retirement doesn’t stop her from inserting herself in investigations during a date with Lucifer.

On the other hand, the Devil has no trouble quitting his LAPD advisory position to be God. Lucifer’s last unconventional therapy session with Linda reveals that he doesn’t want to be the lord. The mantle of God doesn’t fit his personality or talents. But throughout the series, Lucifer has been obsessed with bettering himself through therapy.

In the final season, he actively helps numerous lost souls. The Devil stops Rory from letting rage consume her. “Goodbye Lucifer” ends with Lucifer’s advice freeing Dan of his guilt, therefore, allowing him to ascend to Heaven.

Throughout the ten episodes, the Devil counsels people makes it natural that he chooses to return to Hell. Lucifer’s true purpose is to treat the deceased humans whose guilt traps them in Hell. Lucifer Season 6 reveals the importance of maintaining good mental health.

Watch all seasons of Lucifer on Netflix!

[thoughts-on-bangtan]

I feel bad for JK. He's the jealous BF in every pairing. I say support who you want, but if JM came out tomorrow and said come out of your imagination about Vmin (The way V did about TK) or V went on camera saying his and JM's relationship was awkward (The way JK did about V), I would pack it up. Yet Tkrs continue to disrespect Tae and JK. Sometimes JKrs too cause they also cast JK as the jealous, insecure boyfriend. Too bad, neither group sees One half of their ships are in love with each other

This turned into a bit of a rant, I hope you don’t mind...

Leaving aside my opinions on T*ak*ok and J*k*ok as “romantic ships” and focusing just on the actual people, or more specifically on Jungkook (as well as those who use him for their ships in toxic manners), I very much agree. 

Jungkook is a good person, a kindhearted one at that, he works incredibly hard, he’s incredibly hard on himself, holds himself to a sky high standard, and is a perfectionist at that, he tries his best regardless of what it is he’s doing, his heart is so big, pure and filled with love not only for his hyungs but also for ARMY, even though some have done him incredibly dirty in the past, and others continue to do so to this day and chances are they likely won’t stop any time soon. Jungkook is also a romantic, someone who believes he will hear bells when he’ll meet/look at the person he’s destined to be with/his one true love, someone who wrote Still With You for ARMY and tried his best to convey his emotions just right, who even has the word tattooed on his hand, is someone who’s sensitive to smells, likes doing laundry and snuggles against his hyungs when he’s cold. He cried and was inconsolable when Hobi temporarily left Bangtan, recorded a song cover in 30 minutes simply because Namjoon said the song would fit his voice, and he painted a pretty painting for Hobi simply because he asked him for it.

Remember when Jungkook was a guest on Yoongi’s ‘radio’ in May 2020? How nervous he was and how he felt the need to explain himself and apologize to ARMY for potentially having upset us, even though, realistically, there was nothing really there for what he would have to apologize and with how some were quick to throw him under the bus (again), if anyone should’ve apologized, it would’ve been those people. To this day Jungkook continues to rarely be on social media, rarely posts a selca and goes on vlive even less, and honestly, I completely understand him. I would do the same, though I won’t pretend that I know his exact reasoning.

Like you said, there is a large portion of shippers (not all of them, of course, but I’m specifically talking about the bad ones here, and my opinions on these shippers have no connection whatsoever with my opinions on and love for the maknaes and their bonds, just so we’re clear) who have created this alternative reality version of him which shares no resemblance with who he actually is beyond the name and body. Somehow, they’ve created this jealous, possessive and toxic version of him that constantly feels the need to mark his territory, gets angry and has controlling tendencies toward either Jimin or Tae (oddly enough I haven’t seen that happen as much when he’s shipped with a member of the hyung line), depending on which camp you ask. How long did it take for “JK was so jealous” analysis videos to appear after RUN episode 128 and that moment of Tae kissing Seokjin’s cheek? An hour, two?

And if that’s not what they are doing, they overs*xualize him to the point where it just feels gross and so dehumanizing it crosses every imaginable line. Or they infantilize him as though he were still the teenage boy we got to know when they debuted 7.5 years ago, which is especially ironic and weird when the people who do this are younger than him.

Of course this isn’t just an issue with Jungkook, it’s something that happens with all three of the maknaes, but I feel like it happens a little differently (or manifests itself differently) for each one of them, and Jungkook, being involved in both of the main big ships, basically has it worst. He isn’t treated as someone they love or admire, not because he’s part of their ship but because of his talents and other qualities as idol and human being, but as basically a human Sim that shippers project their own fantasies onto. They lack respect and the bare minimum of human decency. They don’t care about him as person, barely care about his music if they can’t find a way to connect it to their ship, they just want him to look pretty and act accordingly so they can continue living their shipper lives and search for “proof”, even if sometimes that means twisting reality, ignoring context, and making someone out of Jungkook who he really is not.

And honestly, just like you, if Tae or Jimin would come online and say “get out of your imagination” about vmin, I would accept that immediately and move on. Sure, I’d be a little sad and surprised, but I wouldn’t look for ways to twist their words to create some kind of false deniability of their statement, wouldn’t try to find some kind of loophole that would allow me to ignore their words and continue doing what we do. But, unfortunately, many don’t think that way. Clearly.

At some point, I think, some have forgotten why we are here in the first place, as well as the fact that Jungkook, Jimin and Taehyung are actual living, breathing human beings, and not fictional characters. We are here, first and foremost, for their music, since that’s what got us interested in them in the first place, right? Or at least that’s how it should be, though I know visual stans are a thing, and apparently shipping stans also seem to be a thing that exists. And sure, shipping is fun, having a pair you particularly like together for one reason or another, because you think there might actually be something there, like we do as vminnies, or because you simply like their dynamic, but the moment your entire existence as ARMY is merely revolving around your ship and finding ways to prove, against all logic and contextual evidence, that they are real, even if it means disrespecting the people that are part of your ship, as well as the other five people in the group they love more than anyone, that’s when you’ve gone too far. Way too far.

We know how much Jungkook loves the members, how much he respects them, and we know he had a bit of an awkward rough patch (at least partially) with Tae, since they told us about that, and he enjoys spending time and being silly with Jimin, and yet ship camp one and two have no issue disrespecting, belittling, badmouthing and erasing his friendships with either of them, or basically flat out calling him a liar (or a BH controlled puppet with no free will or ability to speak out when he doesn’t like something) because what he said about his friendship with Tae doesn’t fit their agenda.

Jungkook is basically stripped of all agency, humanity, free will, and everything else that makes him a person, an idol, and just an extremely talented and kind individual. They even try to take away his name despite the well-known fact that Koreans don’t change last names. It’s upsetting, unsettling, and wrong on every possible level.

I couldn’t care less which BTS duo others ship, I’m not the kind of person who will go and try to convince others that I’m right and they are wrong because, for all we know, we could all be wrong, but I think the least anyone in the shipping world can do is have enough restraint and humanity in them to show a bare minimum of respect for the people they ship and treat them like human beings, not Sims or dolls. Especially since we know the members are aware of all of this to some degree because there is no way they didn’t notice all the comments during vlives across the years, didn’t notice the videos on YouTube (we know Jungkook looks up reaction videos etc), and didn’t notice the posts on Weverse, after all we had Tae tell off a shipper.

All I really wish for is for people to see and treat Jungkook as the good, kind, intelligent and talented person he is. Ship him with whoever you want, that’s none of my business, but please respect him and see him for who he is, not who you’d want him to be so there would be more drama to theorize about. It’s the least he deserves. It’s the least all of them do.

[go-hux-yourself]

Regret

So I’m having fun participating in FebuWhump :D This is Day 1′s prompt fill for mind control :D Classic kylux time :) This work titled Regret.

See also on my ao3 here. My masterlist archive of bullshit i write can be found linked at the top of the blog or here. 

--

He raises the blaster to fire, but Ren already has him pinned in place by the force.

The assassination attempt isn’t entirely a surprise, but the immediate sting of hurt accompanying it certainly is. Kylo knew Hux was bitter-- downright hated him after he’d used the force on him after killing Snoke; both times- but Ren had always assumed that what they’d had had been more.

Yes, their relationship had soured to the point where the memory of desperate kisses and passionate embraces now seems like impossible fantasy, but Ren never thought Hux hated him so much to want to make an actual attempt on his life.

And that’s definitely what this is.

It hurts Ren more than he’s willing to admit, and the fact that Hux isn’t already dead for the attempt tells Kylo a lot more about himself than he’d been aware.

Hux doesn’t fight against the force that has him frozen in place, though. He doesn’t struggle, doesn’t sneer, the unemotional, business-like single-mindedness to move his finger and pull the trigger on the gun his only concern.

It’s part of what stops Ren from murderously lashing out; the uncharacteristic placidness to the assassination attempt. Had Hux gone so cold from him? He’s so detached from the action, even considering their past and what they’d once had.

It’s like a slap to Ren's face.

Some part of him is consumed with an ache beyond soothing; a thing that still craves Hux’s love and attention, wanting to protect and cherish the man even as Hux’s finger still itches to pull the trigger. He can feel it now, the intensity with which Hux wants to shoot him, but nothing else below the surface.

Ren frees Hux’s mouth; frees him enough to speak-- defend his actions, vent his spleen, rage or coldly tell him he deserves it- but no words come.

Hux doesn’t speak. The look in his green eyes is intense, but vacant. He’s still focused on the goal of pulling the trigger, his entire being trying in vain against Ren’s force-hold. It’s all he wants; all he needs.

No, Hux might be doing this, but this wasn’t Hux.

“...Hux.” Ren doesn’t want to kill him for this. He doesn't want to hurt him, either. Even right now, blaster in hand aimed his way, Ren doesn’t want to hurt him. He still wishes he’d never hurt Hux in the first place, but Crait had been the last nail in the coffin, and after that, anything between them had fully withered and died. He’d foolishly allowed it to happen, regretting the distance between them now.

Ren doesn’t bother asking, using the force to enter Hux’s mind to understand what is happening. A deeper dive beneath the general’s one-train track of thoughts finds a compulsion planted firmly in Hux’s brain: shoot Kylo Ren. Shoot him. Shoot him. Must shoot him. Pull the trigger. Shoot him.

Whoever manipulated the general’s mind to try and carry out this assassination attempt must not have been aware that Ren can easily stop blaster bolts in midair. They must have counted on Hux having special proximity to the Supreme Leader. The element of surprise might’ve worked otherwise, but whoever did it clearly didn’t know that Hux hasn’t shared his bed in months.

“Hux…” Ren puts both gloved hands on either side of the other man’s face. He brushes thumbs over his cheeks, but there’s no recognition in his eyes aside from the desire to fire his weapon at his target. It’s his sole purpose at the moment; something Ren needs to snuff it out.

That’s easier said than done, though.

The compulsion to kill Ren is woven deeper into Hux’s mind than he feels safe simply ripping from the man’s head; the desire to shoot him is wrapped up in Hux’s own cognizance of anything Kylo Ren. Should he simply destroy it, he could destroy anything good Hux ever associated with him. ...or even erase himself completely from the general's mind.

It’s a much more complex problem than Ren at first assumed.

“Hux… Hux, I know you’re in there,” Ren growls, but his words fall on deaf ears. He tries to use the force in the man’s mind to snap him out of it and spark some recognition to wake him up from the drive compelling him, but the strain of such a thing has a visible result.

Hux’s nose begins to bleed and his heart rate skyrockets. A migraine pulses in the general’s head, and Hux is consciously numb to it all; to anything not devoted to putting a bolt in the Supreme Leader. The drive to shoot Ren is too important. Hux would accomplish his task at the cost of himself if he had to-- that’s the message here- and Ren realizes that this is far more dangerous than assumed. Someone was going to die, but it wasn’t going to be him, and it wasn’t going to be Hux.

Ren decides to let him pull the trigger.

The bolt goes wide and strikes the durasteel wall. Hux immediately fires another as Ren easily diverts it as well, listening in to the other man’s mind; he’s still noticeably absent. The end goal is not to fire the blaster, after all, but to shoot Ren. Not doing so when Ren is right there is punishing his body for noncompliance.

Ren makes another stupid choice, but it’s the obvious, simple one to make.

As Hux’s next shot finds its mark and hits home, Ren shouts at the pain-- it hurts less than a bowcaster, certainly, but it’s still a blaster set to kill impacting scar tissue- gripping his side with a snarl as he lets his force-hold on Hux go.

The gun clatters to the floor as Hux seems to wake up just as Ren had hoped. He’s blinking, touching at his face, visibly disoriented and confused. He wipes beneath his nose, seeing the glistening red of blood on the black synth leather of his glove. He’s next staring at the blaster he’s just dropped with something akin to dawning horror, like recognition from within a dream. Then his attention is finally drawn to Kylo.

Blood leaves Hux’s already pale face stark white, and makes the smear below his nose that much more brilliant. Ren doesn’t just hear the other man’s thoughts, but he can feel them too, flooding in in tumult after the vacancy that previously occupied his mind.

Fright. Worry. Shock. Concern. Fear. Hux doesn’t know how he got here or what he’s doing here, but he realizes what he’s apparently done, and knows that there’s no explaining it; no excuse he could possibly give to save himself.

That Hux genuinely thinks Ren will kill him-- wonders why he’s still alive- makes the self-appointed Supreme Leader growl in his throat.

“I let you shoot me,” Ren says pointedly, still standing but hunched over himself where he’d been hit in the side. He considers sitting back where he’d been meditating when Hux came in. “...Are you awake now?”

Hux is still rooted to the spot, mind spinning with concern for himself, concern for Ren, disbelief that this was even happening, and disbelief that he’s still alive. “Supreme Leader, I—!”

“Hux.” It’s both an expression of annoyance and pain. Not pain over the shot in his side-- he’s definitely had worse- but the distance between them has never been felt so keenly before, and he understands just how much of a betrayal his actions over Crait had been to the other man. He doesn’t like the look on Hux’s face-- afraid of him and what he might do over what is clearly a failed assassination attempt regardless of reason. He doesn’t want Hux’s fear; he wants to reassure him, soothe him that it’s not his fault.

He’d also really like the burn of the bolt to stop throbbing in his skin, and maybe some bacta to soothe that. The pain serves him no purpose; he doesn’t want to fight with Hux.

Hux’s voice is cautious, standing there looking between Kylo’s face and the blaster wound to the man’s side. “...I swear I don’t know how I came to be here, Ren...”

“I know.”

There’s a few moments of silence then, punctuated by Ren’s heavy breathing and the beat of Hux’s heart in his own ears. “...You let me shoot you…?”

Hux’s eyes linger on the wound Ren has a gloved hand over. Ren isn’t sure what to make of the look on Hux's face. He can feel the other man’s mental walls going up, and he doesn’t push against it, withdrawing from Hux’s mind instead.

Ren decides to lean on his ‘throne’ of a huge chair he’d been meditating in when Hux had first entered. The wound still hurts, but the way he’s leaned is better. “It was either that, or kill you. I have no desire to kill you, Hux. That wasn’t you, besides.”

Hux’s eyes dart to Ren’s own, back once to his injury, and then back to his face. “Ren…”

“A force-user has had access to you somehow…” Ren grimaces as his side twinges painfully. Hux makes an abortive move like he wanted to move towards Kylo, but doesn’t. “One of considerable skill. Security footage will need to be reviewed.”

Hux nods slowly in agreement with that same look on his face; wonder that he wasn’t being strangled to death or cut down with Ren’s lightsaber. He’d been compromised, used by the enemy somehow-- maybe this was even an attempt on his life via Kylo Ren as executioner’s tool- but it would be a lie to say his only worry is what the Supreme Leader might do to him for the fact.

At present it’s not even Hux’s most distressing concern, which is a tell all its own.

“...Ren, may I see that?”

Ren looks up, his heart clenching in wistful longing for the look on Hux’s face. With anyone else it might be a ploy; an attempt to get closer to finish the job. But he knows that look. He nods, and Hux comes close.

Inspecting the wound carefully, eyeing his own marksmanship, Hux frowns. Had it been a slightly different angle, it might’ve hit his heart. He wonders if Ren had diverted the shot to something less-lethal. He hopes the man had had that much sense before letting Hux put a damn blaster bolt in him. “...I’m sorry, Ren.”

“No, I’m sorry.”

The way Hux touches him tentatively at first makes Ren’s throat tighten. He knows that Hux is talking about the wound, but his mind is full of so much more, and all of his personal offenses against the other man. He wants to apologize for all of it-- something he never did- but he doesn’t even know how to start.

Not a day passes that Ren wishes he could take back what happened at Crait. He’s never regretted anything more than how he treated Hux, and how it utterly destroyed them. How he’d taken these kinds of touches as a given in the past; how wistful it makes him now, and lonelier for it.

Hux is skilled at battlefield aid, and the wound is already cauterized from the bolt. Ren’s in no immediate danger, but he gladly lets the general tend to him before Hux says they need to call a med-droid; he definitely needs bacta. Ren agrees, but lets Hux bandage him in the mean time.

This is the first time Hux has touched him since Crait, and his hands are just as gentle on him as ever.

Ren doesn’t ask Hux to leave when the med-droid arrives.

Hux stands by his side, and doesn’t ask to go.

--

my kofi | ao3 main

[okayto]

Mini-Review: Love, Chunibyo & Other Delusions!

I’m so glad @littlestartopaz​ recommended this to me, because it was SO GOOD.

Yuta wants to start high school afresh: new school far from home, new classmates who don’t know he spent middle school acting out the fantasy of being the mysterious and magic “Dark Flame Master,” new him. But one of his classmates has delusions of her own, and after she accidentally discovers his embarrassing past, Yuta is unwillingly drawn into her life and a growing circle of friends with their own quirks.

The “chunibyo” of the title basically means “8th grade syndrome;” a phase in middle school where some kids inhabit and act out their own fantasy stories, positing themselves as dark magicians, magical girls, and other wielders of magical powers.

I had avoided this for a while, until it was specifically recommended to me, because honestly, it sounds embarrassing, right? It sounds like it’s gonna be an embarrassing manic pixie dream girl scenario. But what it actually contains is the story of how a mixed bag of students--some actively chunibyo, others not--become friends and develop very endearing close relationships, while arguing and frustrating each other because that’s what friends do.

Now, the idea of being the star of what’s essentially your own fantasy-action anime is embarrassing, but what’s notable is that the show doesn’t really hold the chunibyo characters up for mockery. Sure we might laugh at them, but hey--it’s funny to watch friends be silly together. And most viewers, just like some of the characters who have moved on from their chunibyo phases, probably easily understand the mix of soul-wrenching embarrassment and (mild?) fond sentiment that comes with remembering our middle school selves.

But let’s be real: the reactions the two former chunibyo students, Yuta and Shinka have to being reminded of middle school, are #RELATABLE

Rikka, our title chunibyo, in particular uses her fantasy in part to cope with grief, coming from an extended family that (without getting spoilery) didn’t help a young girl to deal with a very hard and life-changing time. Now that she’s in high school, her older sister blackmails Yuta (using an a voice recording of one of his chunibyo speeches) into helping deal with Rikka and things (like the cat she wants to adopt) that pop up.

One thing the show is very good at, though, is not making a single thing the reason behind a character’s chunibyo. One may have started their fantasy inspired by another person, or prompted by an event, but it’s also (while active) part of their personal narrative that influences how they spent their free time, how they see the world and keep blogs or diaries, etc.

But at the same time, they’re still teenagers, and their inner view of themselves...doesn’t always translate skills.

I said the show is primarily about friendship. A lot of that friendship is between Yuta and Rikka, but they accumulate a little group, mainly through Rikka’s attempt to start a magic club. Recruit 1: Kumin, a polite, quiet senpai with no chunibyo history or aspirations.

Kumin starts off seeming like a background character, but by the second season it’s clear she’s not just there for jokes about how she’ll take a nap anywhere. She’s perceptive, and genuinely enjoys watching the others act out their scenarios.

Compared to the other characters who are boisterous in their chunibyo activities (Rikka, Deko, Satone), or vociferously trying not to get drawn in to chunibyo activities (Yuta, Shinka), Kumin is happy to watch and offer encouragement, but she’s also willing to participate if a chunibyo scenario calls for a group.

Incidentally, the show does a really interesting thing where occasionally, we’ll be drawn “inside” the chunibyo world, seeing what Rikka/Deko/whoever see: a fantasy land, big magical weapons, anime-grade magical attacks. Occasionally we’ll also see what this “really” looks like--a couple people running around waving umbrellas at each other--but often we only get the fantasy version. It’s clear that Rikka and co. are legitimately on some level engaging in a shared imagination, and the times when a reluctant character (particularly Yuta or Shinka) willing steps in to the shared illusion are genuinely sweet.

Speaking of, Shinka (aka Morisummer) became one of my favorite characters. Like Yuta, she was chunibyo (”Morisummer the magician”); like Yuta, she chose a high school where she didn’t know anyone expressly so she could reinvent herself as a normal teen. And like Yuta, she’s getting dragged kicking and screaming into chunibyo again.

It would’ve been so easy to make her a bad character. She’s pretty, puts a lot of effort into being popular and likable at school, trying to keep up a good teen girl image, despite being fairly sarcastic at her core. And as loathe as she is to admit it, she likes her friends (even if she won’t admit they’re friends, even if half of them are actively chunibyo, even if she says she’s only hanging around so she can make sure all traces of chunibyo-Morisummer are erased from the internet).

Shinka gets drawn in to the group through Rikka’s apparently only pre-existing friend: Deko, a fellow chunibyo who follows Rikka (or “Eye of the Wicked Lord Shingan”) as her master, and is extremely devoted to the great magician Morisummer. So devoted, in fact, that she has several physical copies of Morisummer’s book containing all her wisdom...aka Shinka-Morisummer’s blog, which Shinka has tried to erase all trace of.

Needless to say, the two don’t seem to get along great.

Deko’s dedication to chunibyo and Morisummer irks Shinka; Shinka’s claim to be Morisummer irks Deko, who refuses to believe the great magician could ever be this sarcastic, mundane girl. Deko’s refusal irks Shinka, bringing out the sarcasm and bluntness Shinka tries to hide from the school at large.

Obviously, they actually become close friends, but heaven help you if you actually say so.

The entire series is an exploration of relationships, and Yuta’s developing closeness with Rikka (hey, we knew it was going to happen) is also sweet. He’s a genuinely likable boy, embarrassed by the vestiges of his former self he sees in Rikka, but often willing to meet her on her level, and both of them also learn/reaffirm the importance of doing things their way, and keeping both of them comfortable, rather than acting a certain way or performing specific acts just because their classmates think their relationship status mandates it.

Speaking of classmates--and I know this is getting long but I CAN’T HELP IT, I LIKED SO MANY ASPECTS OF THIS SERIES--the characters aren’t ridiculed at school. Sure, some people think they’re weird, but there’s no shunning, no arc involving teasing or bullies. Rikka’s often content as a loner, but when she attempts to join in a social circle, she’s welcomed. Shinka’s obsessed with reinventing herself and appearing normal and seems to think that otherwise she’ll be cast out, but multiple characters mention that others at the school notice how she behaves (oddly, on occasion) and there are no social repercussions. Truly nice for a show that has characters spending quite a lot of time in school.

Verdict

English dub? Yes, and it’s got strong performances. Rikka’s voice actor in particular does a fantastic job capturing the difference between chunibyo!Rikka’s confidence and command, and regular!Rikka’s, well, normal awkward teenageness. (Plus, I also found her lower-than animegirl-average voice enjoyable.) (Double plus, I honestly think her English voice is better than her original Japanese voice at showing the difference between her emotions and chunibyo/reality.) Deko’s VA is fantastic showing the enthusiasm of the 9th grader (and what enthusiasm, Deko is like the Energizer Bunny), and Shinka’s VA manages to show her alternating annoyance, cheerfully sweet ideal self, and organizized leader voices.

Visuals: Fine, and I really liked the chunibyo designs for each character’s chunibyo phase. The contrast between chunibyo-vision (giant magic weapons; mysterious lights, fantasy landscapes) and reality (an umbrella or soup ladle; a strip of lights taped to the floor; a local park) was really well done.

Worth watching? Yessss. It’s very manageable--two 12-episode seasons--and while each season contains its own arc (you could stop after the first one, but why), together they make an excellent story. Heck, I think the second season is equal to, if not better than, the first, because the friend group is well-established and even more fun to watch.

Where to watch (USA, as of October 2020): Netflix (dub, sub); Crunchyroll (sub), HIDIVE (sub & dub, plus OVAs and film)

Click my “reviews” tag below or search “mini review” on my blog to find more!

[life-rewritten]

SPOOKY SEASON! An ode to Mo Dao Zu Shi: one of the best BL story created!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!! One last Halloween post and it's about one of my favourite pieces of media in the world of BL, romance, and supernatural stories. Roll your eyes because once again I'm talking about Mo Dao Zu Shi (The grandmaster of demonic cultivation) I mean already with the demons, and cultivation is already hinting why this is Halloween themed, and trust me MDZ has much more than that: from zombies to ghosts, to magical instruments and weapons, and we love our fantasy cultivation sects and clans. Anyhoo, I am here to write a fun post another verdict/review on each of the adaptations available so far for MDZ, yeh you heard me I've listened, read and watched all versions of this masterpiece, and I'm here to tell you to go and do the same for Halloween. Also in case, you haven't heard MTX (the author of MDZ) has another show on its way TODAY! And that's the magnificent, the excellent and incredible Heaven's Official Blessing after marathoning MDZ do that too. 

As always with my verdicts: we have ratings: From 1 to 5 (1 being least excited to watch, 5 being most,) how excited am I to delve into these again? 

Country: China Genre: Danmei, Supernatural, Action, Fantasy, Romance, Comedy, BL, Horror,

1.The Book

We begin with the one that started it all. The reason for my devotion and love for this world, for Wei Wuxian and Lan Wang Ji. My heart hasn't stopped loving this book experience. And at first, it wasn't easy to understand all the logic and terms needed to know for this world of cultivation and sects and clans, and magical skills. But once I got the hang of it (maybe after reading it three times I wonder how I had time to do this by the way), this is a book that I keep on returning to, crying to, and just breaking down into a mess too. This book is the most original source for the love story of Wangxian and to be honest its a masterpiece. Now onto the pros and cons, I guess about this adaptation.

Pro: 

First, I would say that this is the most non censored version of MDZ, meaning China couldn't mute the romance or delete scenes because it's the original written story. The romance between Wangxian stands out and makes your heart go through a lot of emotions, from frustration at Wei  Wuxian not realising how he feels for Wang Ji, to pain because of Wang Ji's perceived unrequited feelings for so long, to happiness when they're just together, to confusion at some drunk scenes and then to all-out shock as the story reveals its self to the villains, the background of Weiying's death and more. 

The introduction to all these characters, all of them have a role in the story, all of them are important to keep an eye on, and they all grow and develop throughout the story as we find out more about their circumstances and their own perspective on Wei Wuxian.

Cons but not actual cons

The book is longggggg. The first time I read it I wondered when we would finally get a resolution or hint that Wei Wuxian finally understands what he's been feeling for sooo long, but it took forever and to be honest even though this is a con to me, it also is a positive for those who love slowwwww burns, and slow reveal to the background and development of Wangxians feelings for each other. There are many missions although essential to the world-building and the actual plot/mystery that at first seem so useless and not needed, but they are there for a purpose, and they do help us find out more clues about what's been going on and why Wei Wuxian was brought back from the dead. 

The book is the most non censored version of MDZ, and so there are many questionable moments/questions about Non-consent that occur during moments when Wangxian are drunk. Honestly, these scenes are so weird to me, because they hold so much truth and revelations to Wangji's feelings for Weiying. After all, he's drunk and the most authentic version of himself. There are so many moments (like stealing chickens or showing him the bunnies) that make you just want to cry at his love Weiying and the pain he had to endure when he thought he was never coming back. Still, at the same time, there are many moments where you're like oh wow that escalated, and you feel just a tad discomfort at the idea of the non-con. But like I said these scenes are required for these two to really like give into what they've both been trying to push away or ignore, and it's nice to see how Weiying reacts to his feelings becoming uncontrollable and more prominent. 

There are some moments in the book where things seem vague or unexplained (which the other sources did their own thing with), some characters who are mentioned but not really given enough detail, some plot details where it's not fully understood. However, I do think that because the book is already so long, the most critical information needed was there and the reveal of the mysteries were all done well. I think though that it's better to see how it materialises visually hence the other media adaptations. 

Ratings: 4/5 -It's not easy to pick up the book and read, but I have so much fun returning to it and laughing along with Wei Wuxian's thoughts and ideas about Wang Ji.

2.The Manhua

I was so shook when I found out MDZ has a manhua. Mostly because China wouldn't really make it easy for the book adaptation to be honestly portrayed visually. But the manga shocked me, it is censored, but the writers and the artists are all so obsessed with this book and this couple that despite having to remove or edit some scenes, they draw some additional scenes and post it online so that international fans can still get to see these moments visually. That is incredible, and I'm so grateful that we have a team of people who respect and love the piece as much as the fans do. 

Pros: 

With any graphic novel/manga the art of MDZ is fantastic to see, the characters are brought to life with colour and also the inclusion of chibi drawings to make a moment incredibly cute or funny. Weiying is very naughty, so a chibi drawing of him makes us see him like how he's acting a child. I enjoy the manhua of MDZ so much, and I love how they drew each of the characters and the world. 

Cons but not really cons: 

I think, however, there are better visual sources for MDZ available that is more detailed in terms of characters and includes more information about the world-building. The plot also has to be condensed as well because you can't draw everything from the book. The manhua is also still in the works so, its a very slow upload and it will take years for it to be completed. But this is understandable, and I can't wait to read the full completed copy. If you hate reading and can't stand words, I think the manhua version is for you!

Ratings: 3.5/5 -It’s the waiting that lowered the ratings for me and the fact that I prefer other sources but I’m so grateful for the manhua. 

3.The Show

The one that brought international fans like swarms to this story. Untamed shocked all of us in the BL community as the first time we heard about it, sure it was nice to see that Yibo was cast as Wang Ji, but even then his acting wasn't that profound or praised so we didn't care, and Zhan also seemed like an interesting choice for out Weiying. I think there were an outrage and confusion when we heard this was going to be censored and a bromance. It felt like it made no sense because there's no way really to edit the relationship and love of Wangxian, so people went into the show resentful and worried. But after 20 episodes, the anger, worry and upset were erased. Untamed is a masterpiece, and it blows my mind how censored it is but still not really censored? It deletes the questionable moments in the book but adds the essential parts even where we get to see Wang Ji's feelings (Though obviously not mentioned as feelings but respect). We get to watch Weiying realise how much he cherishes whatever he has with Wang Ji and how much he misunderstood the latter, and how much Wang Ji cared for him. The show as Netflix says is not about just friends. Still, it emphasises the connection between these two using subtext clues and symbolisms, and visual metaphors to make sure the audience knows that these two are soulmates and are meant for each other. Here are the other pros and cons of the show:

Pros:

The acting is incredible, like so good and I can't think of two people who were more suited for Wangxian, Yibo shocked me as Wang Ji because although I knew him (because of Kpop), I didn't really think he would pull of stoic but still vulnerable Wang Ji. He was good at showing the emotions of love and longing that has been connected with Wang Ji. Zhan was an excellent Wuxian, he made me smile, he made laugh, he made me so happy because of his mischievous aura, but he also played serious and emotional and resentful Wuxian well as well. I keep crying every time I see the death scene in the show because it's just so done well.The directors and producers who didn't care about hiding the relationship between these two, they still wanted to be respectful to the writer and the source, and they still wanted to show as much as possible that these two loved each other. For that, I'm so grateful and they did a brilliant job with what they could. The character arcs and development and depth; Its the way they took the other characters from the book and fleshed them out giving each of them more depth, more understanding, more dimensionality and more story connecting to our plot, and it broke my heart how much I loved everyone in this show. The actors all performed so well, and some gave me goosebumps at how well they portrayed their characters  (Xue Yang!!) like stunning and just a great cast.The storyline was also written in an innovative way, the flashbacks were first shown to the audience, how Wangxian became Wangxian and so the audience felt every single hurt and pain that Wang Ji was feeling. We understood why he acted the way he did. The flashbacks also provided plot structure to the mystery and the actual plot of the show, it left clues, and we watched the villains become villains (secretly), we saw how some characters grew. Each of the arcs in the book was told in a way that it flowed together and made sense. Due to this way of structuring the plot the show became so much more profound in the way it messed with our emotions, every death mattered, and every character had their own story and importance to the audience. 

Cons:

The censorship. I've praised how they overcame it, but it's still there, the ending of the show was done this way because of censorship and to be honest I still think everyone should read the book because there are moments where the romance of Wangxian is fun and memorable to see (the confession scene whilst it was done okay in the show because of censorship it doesn't hold as much oomph as it did in the book. Mainly because the events that happened before it was already so filled with angst and drama and the results of the confession Wangxian clinging onto each other despite being in danger is a must-see, the censorship is annoying because it shouldn't be there, it's something that whilst it did help with some stuff, it still feels like an insult to the piece, and it still doesn't sit well with me that China censors their BL. So its a con.

Ratings 5/5  I think I could spend so much time breaking down why Untamed is a masterpiece BL show, but all I can say is despite 50 episodes (longgg) it is worth the time and effort and if you watch BL, go see it. 

4.The Audio

The audio for the MDZ is like my favourite thing in the world. I love Chinese audiobook dramas; it's an incredible experience to listen to. With MDZ, this is what the show would be if it wasn't censored. The actors for the audio drama are amazing, and I love them so much. The audio drama is three seasons with some extra scenes and it's incredible if you don't want to read the book, then just watch and listen to the audio drama because its the same story but its brought to life by the acting and storytelling. Also though there are some scenes removed, I think the audio drama is the next uncensored gem of MDZ that shows Wangxian's romance the best way possible. I squeal, and I laugh, and again I cry at every single moment; their first kiss, the inn scene, the confession (i spend time pausing it just to cry at how good it is) and more. I just love it, and I prefer it to reading the book. Other pros and cons:

Pros:

 The story is structured and told properly, follows all the arcs and events in the book and brings them life by voice acting, and the music is incredible. It's nice to listen to and hear Weiying's thoughts and to also listen to an audible version of the book. The audio drama has all the pros from the book as well.

Cons: 

Nothing much to say about the cons. It is not easy to attain the audio drama in English subs, its hard to download and store it, but once you overcome that it's great. I think the audio drama is the most difficult to obtain.

Ratings: My favourite adaptation  5/5

5.The Donghua

Lastly, we have the Donghua or the anime version of MDZ.  What can I say about this, its brilliant, masterpiece, it's gorgeous. If you think the art for the manhua is good, the donghua takes it to a different level. The visuals are stunning, the animation is breath-taking, and the story is again following Untamed ways of censoring the story but making sure it doesn't remove the romantic connotations and symbolism to Wangxian. The donghua also follows Untameds way of starting with flashbacks to explain what happened to Weiying before it started. I have nothing else to say about how great this is. It's the same thing I've been saying about all these adaptations. The donghua though is the best visual masterpiece for MDZ, in my opinion. 

Pros; 

Packed full with symbolism and clues to the plot, it's detailed so well for the storyline and its an excellent way to tell this story. The music and ost for the donghua are also beautiful and gets me emotional each time I hear it.

Cons: 

Censorship. That's it, that's what it always is. For me, I think the donghua is the most censored version of MDZ? Or maybe I just feel that way despite the subtext clues; I do feel irritated at the censorship in the donghua.  Let's pray Heaven's official blessing overcomes that.

Ratings: 3.8/5 - I love it so much because of the visuals but apart from that I prefer other sources for MDZ. Still the best donghua that exists. 

So here you have in an in-depth and messy conversation about one of my favourite media pieces to existing right now in BL. I think I will never stop singing praises at MXT for creating this story and I think there's nothing else I rather do than just spend times when I need a distraction watching, listening or reading this story again and again. What about you all.  What do you feel about MDZ? What pros and cons do you have for each adaptation? Which is your favourite. And have you been able to get any rest when we know that Heaven's official blessing is out TODAY!! Let me know your thoughts. Happy Halloween, Enjoy it.

[fanfic-me-up]

Yoga with Bakugou Katsuki

Your weekly competition with archrival and secret crush, Bakugou Katsuki, takes a turn when you invite him to yoga class. Maybe your hope to become something more is not so one-sided after all?

Title: Winning in Downward Dog

Pairing: Bakugou Katsuki x fem!Reader

Warnings: Bakugou trying to be a flexible pretzel and failing 😂😂

Word Count: 2,696

a/n: This is basically a crack fic pls forgive me lol If you enjoy, pls like and reblog! 💖 You can request more here. Side note: For anyone wondering, this was originally posted on my first bnha blog, but that has since been deleted. 

🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

You’re currently pinned beneath Bakugou in the middle of a training exercise where you’re supposed to be on the SAME TEAM. 

“Yield,” Bakugou says.

“Never,” you say.

It’s known in Class 1-A that you and Bakugou have a weekly competition where each of you pick a different activity to see who wins. This competition sometimes gets in the way of school. Most of the time you understood the concept of forgoing pride for the sake of education, but when it came to Bakugou fucking Katsuki you became equally hot-headed and stubborn.

Class 1-A groans in unison. 

Midoriya raises his hand.

“Sensei, you’re going to erase their quirks, right?” He looks genuinely concerned.

“Ugh, I hope so! I don’t wanna be here all day. Again.” Mina complains.

You knee Bakugou, but he won’t budge. He smirks at your struggle.

“Tch. You have to do better than that, dumbass.”

He places more of his body weight so there’s no escape. You can’t help the flutter in your chest at the sudden closeness. He’s radiating pure heat and the faint aroma of caramel emanating off him does little to clear your head.

Yes. It’s true. You have a crush on the one person who’s more concerned with pinning you to the ground during a training exercise than pinning you down on his bed where you belong dammit!

“Can ya’ll wrap this up? Some of us have plans tonight!”

Of course Kaminari would interrupt your fantasy just when it gets to the good part.

“Chill, bro, the movie doesn’t start ‘til 7,” Kirishima says.

“Can I come?” Mineta asks.

“No.” The Bakusquad reply in unison.

You buck up against Bakugou. Your leg slips from his hold and you manage to wrap it around his waist, flipping him over. He grunts as his back hits the ground. You hear crackling, but before he can set off his quirk, you counterattack, leaving him with no opening.

Class 1-A  collectively gasps as you pull an UNO reverse card. Cheers erupt from the girls at the same time the boys groan.

The class has an ongoing bet on who would win your competition at the end of the semester. Bakugou is ahead by one, but you might even the score today.

“You get ‘em girl!” Mina shouts.

“Awww dude way to let the boys down!” Kaminari shakes his head.

“Shut up, shitty hair!” Bakugou shouts.

He glares at the rest of the class, daring them to utter another word. They don’t. A couple minutes pass of Bakugou trying every which way to get out of your hold and you countering every one of his moves with ease.

“I could do this all day,” you say.

“Me too,” Bakugou spits, sparks erupt from his palm.

“I can’t,” Aizawa says, erasing both of your quirks.

Class 1-A groans in unison once again.

“Ugh! But Sensei it was finally getting interesting!” Kaminari says.

Yeah, just like my fantasy was getting interesting until you interrupted it! Hmph!

“Guess nobody wins this time,” Kirishima shrugs.

“Technically I won,” you say.

You gasp as you feel the wind get knocked out of you and suddenly you’re looking up at vermilion eyes.

“No, I win.” Bakugou smirks.

You can’t bring yourself to be upset as his hands grip your wrists. You’d lose a million times over if it meant Bakugou touching you.

“Say it.” 

You cock your head, “Say what?” 

“Say ‘I win’.” 

“I win.”

Bakugou’s nose scrunches in frustration.

“That’s not what I- you know what I mean!”

Aizawa clears his throat. 

Both of you turn to see Class 1-A hanging onto your every word like they’re watching the final battle in Avengers: Infinity War. Kaminari is munching on some popcorn, passing the bowl around to the rest of the class.

How did that boy even…? Nevermind.

It’s best for you not to think about the weirdness that is Class 1-A. It would only give you a headache.

“Nobody wins. You both failed the exercise,” Aizawa says, “And get up. You’re both making me uncomfortable.” 

You and Bakugou make awkward eye contact before he gets off of you. You swear a tinge of red flushes his cheeks as he offers his hand for you to take, but you know he’s only offering it as a sign of respect. That doesn’t stop your hand from shaking as you reach out to take it. You mumble a quick ‘thanks’ and he responds with a soft ‘whatever’ as he helps you to your feet.

“Class dismissed,” Aizawa says. Mina and Kaminari whoop before racing to the dorms. Everyone else follows, leaving you and Bakugou trailing behind. You’re racking your brain trying to come up with something to say. You don’t want to let this opportunity of getting Bakugou alone go to waste. 

C’mon, Y/N think of something…  Oh! I can ask about the movie they’re watching tonight? No… he’ll think I wanna come along or something, which I do, but I don’t want him thinking I do! 

Oh lord have mercy on me.

You’re about to fuck it and pull a ridiculous comment about the weather out of your ass when Bakugou speaks up.

“I won.”

You raise an eyebrow. He’s still on that?

“I did.” 

“Why do you have such an obsession with winning?” There’s no malice in your tone. You just genuinely want to know.

“You wanna die!?” Bakugou puffs his chest, tiny sparks fizzling in his palms, ready to blast at any second.

You throw your hands up in surrender.

Please don’t kill me. 

“Don’t get me wrong, it’s great to strive to be the best. That’s why we’re all here. But we were on the same team today, Bakugou, and you still couldn’t handle the fact that I would be the one to lead our team to victory. Why?” 

You’re just as competitive as the next U-A student trying to go pro, but even you knew when to quit, especially if it jeopardizes the team or the mission. Your quirk was just a better fit for this particular exercise and Bakugou knew that.

“I don’t need to listen to this bullshit, especially from a fucking extra.” Bakugou stomps off.

“Wait! Bakugou!”

You stop him by touching his arm; he jerks at the contact as if he’s been burned. 

“Don’t touch me!”

You try to hide the hurt as you take your hand off his arm.

Of course he’d hate the idea of touching me in any way besides holding my hand to arm wrestle. Ugh! Why can’t I have a crush on literally anyone else!?

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean-”

“Whatever. What’s the challenge this week?” he grumbles, looking away from you.

You didn’t want to push any further and make Bakugou hate you even more. It’s sad to know you don’t have a chance with him which is why you look forward to these competitions. If this was the only way to spend time with him, then you’re gonna take it. 

“Yoga tomorrow at 8.”

“Tch. Yoga? My grandma does yoga on her deathbed.”

“If you don’t show up, guess it means you forfeit and I win.”

You walk away knowing full well Bakugou won’t back down from a challenge. You hear him shout from across the way.

“Like hell I’d forfeit, loser!”

🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

You’re warming up before class when the doors swing open and in walks Bakugou with a permanent scowl etched on his face. The class regulars (who are all girls) huddle together whispering about the “hot new guy.” 

Bakugou unfolds his mat next to yours.

“Oi, Y/L/N.”

You turn to him, “Morning to you too, Bakugou.”

“Get ready to die,” he smirks.

You roll your eyes at the dramatics. 

“Please, I’m sure I can beat someone who yells ‘DIE GERMS’ every time he brushes his teeth.”

Bakugou’s teeth clench at the dig against his personal hygiene habits. You could see the vein on his forehead threatening to pop. Teasing Bakugou always brought a smile to your face. He was just so cute when he got riled up.

“You wanna go, shitty woman!?” 

It’s too easy.

“Save that for the field,” you say before returning to your stretches, but you’re interrupted once again.

“Psst.”

You turn to the girl next to you.

“You know him?” She nods at Bakugou stretching with his earphones in. The scowl on his face reads “fuck off”.

“Yeah, why?”

“He’s hot.” The girl sighs in a daze.

I know, girl. Trust me, I know. 

Every aspect of Bakugou’s body screams power. He trains harder than most and it shows. The long grueling hours spent going to the gym and honing his quirk have really paid off. From defined shoulders, to the lines of his six pack visible even underneath his shirt, all the way down to the powerful thighs that could crush you in an instant and you would happily thank them for it.

“I can hear you,” Bakugou snaps. 

Shit.

Your heart skips a beat, afraid you pulled an Izuku with thinking out loud. Thankfully, he’s referring to the girl next to you who squeaks and returns to her stretches. 

Phew… That was a close one. 

You clear your throat.

“You better not get us kicked out of this class, too. I actually like yoga.”

“Where’s the fun in that?” he smirks.

Bakugou got you both kicked out of the chess club when he went all ‘sparky sparky boom boom man’ on the chess board after you won. The president of the chess club cried. It wasn’t a pretty sight. Now, you both have to play chess in the dorms.

The class begins with simple stretches. You sneak a peek at Bakugou who looks oddly calm for once. You’re used to him either being angry or… being angry. There really was no in between for the boy. But right now, with his eyes closed, he looked almost at peace. 

“I can do this in my sleep.”

And of course the moment is ruined the moment he opens his mouth.

“This is only the beginning, my friend,” you say.

Bakugou loses some of his vigor halfway through. He’s huffing and puffing as you go into an intense hip flexor stretch.

“You okay there, buddy?”

You’re sweating a bit by this point, but not as much as Bakugou who’s struggling to keep up.

“I’m fine,” he snaps. 

The class goes into the splits. Your split is perfect, but Bakugou is still a little ways off the floor. He tries to subtly wipe the sweat beading down his forehead.

“You know yoga has a ton of amazing benefits. If you keep at it, you could knock someone out going into a downward dog.”

“Shut up,” he grunts. His knees buckle under the pressure of the new position.

“Y/N, can you assist our new student?” Your instructor asks.

The rest of the class turns to you and Bakugou. 

“Oi! I don’t need any help, old hag!”

You grimace at his loud tone, a harsh opposition to the otherwise calming atmosphere.

“He doesn’t really mean that,” you try to cover for him.

“Yes, I do! Oi! Stop looking at me dumbass, yes, you over there-”

You muffle his screaming with your hand against his mouth. You place your other hand on his waist and guide him into the correct position. You can tell he’s holding his breath.

“Breathe. That’s it. Now tighten your core like this,” you whisper in his ear. Your hands glide down his stomach. His ears are beet red and he’s looking anywhere, but at you.

“Are you okay?” 

“Tch. I’m fine. Now, get your hands off me, shitty woman.”

You sigh. Of course. Should I expect anything else at this point?

All the women bounce up to you at the end of class. They’re giggling and sneaking glances at Bakugou who’s rolling up his mat.

“Who is that?”

“Do you know him, Y/N?”

You’re taken aback. Since when were you on a first name basis with any of these girls? For the past three years you preferred to stay in the back of the class and leave once it ended. The women are a bit… much and they don’t pay much attention to you anyway, just the way you like it, so it’s startling when eager eyes are on you awaiting a response.

“Is he single?” Another girl asks.

I certainly hope so.

The group shushes each other as Bakugou walks up to you.

“Same time next week, loser?” 

Next week is his turn to choose the competition. Does he really think he has a chance of getting his splits down in a week?

“You want to do yoga again?” 

“Not for our competition, idiot.” The excitement radiating from the group of girls behind you only feeds your heart fluttering in your chest. You don’t want to get your hopes up, but Bakugou has never been interested in meeting up with you outside of class if it’s not for your competition. 

You want to be sure of what he’s asking. You couldn’t bear the thought of believing this is leading to something more only for Bakugou to say it’s not. 

“If not for our competition, then what for?” 

Bakugou looks at you, his cheeks are flushed red and you know it’s not from the yoga anymore. 

Holy shit, is this it? Is Bakugou fucking Katsuki actually asking me out? After we just spent the last hour in downward dog? Note to self: I’d like to give a shoutout to the yoga gods that made this possible. You the real ones.

You lean against the wall in an attempt to be casual, but it’s only because your legs are literally shaking from the excitement that Bakugou is asking you out. 

Bakugou glances at the girls behind you murmuring between themselves.

“Tch. Forget it.” He grabs his bag and walks out.

Wait. What? No! Come back!

You hear the girls gossiping with each other, all of them excited that Bakugou’s becoming a yoga regular.

“He’s coming back next week!?”

“Ugh! He’s so freaking hot! I can’t even!”

“What should I wear!?”

You don’t pay them any attention as you run out the door in an attempt to salvage... whatever you have with Bakugou. It’s complicated, okay!?

“Bakugou!” 

He doesn’t look back, but you know he heard you. 

“Bakugou! Wait!” 

“What!?” He snaps, but the blush on his cheeks give him away.

“I’m down for the same time next week.” 

He crosses his arms and scowls.

“Are you deaf? I said forget it.”

“Oh.” 

Bakugou sighs; his hand coming up to rub the back of his neck in a gesture you’ve only seen a couple times from him.

Wait is Bakugou… nervous? 

“I know I’m gonna pop off on one of those girls and I don’t want to get you kicked out. I know you like yoga for whatever goddamn reason…” 

“What if we had a private yoga class?” 

You’re fully prepared to be rejected. Your relationship was one of rivalry and competition, what you’re suggesting would be breaking into new territory, but you were tired of pining. It was better to know he doesn’t like you than to spend your time at U.A. wondering. 

Bakugou doesn’t expect that question and you certainly don’t expect his response.

“I do need to practice my splits more.” He looks down at the ground, ashamed for admitting he needs practice. You can tell he doesn’t admit this to just anybody. Your heart skips a beat at the thought of Bakugou viewing you as more than just the extra he claims you are.

“I can help with that,” you say.

“Tch. I don’t need your help.”

You shrug, “Fine, don’t come crying to me when you break your hip. You’ll never be able to take someone down in downward dog.”

“I CAN TAKE ANYONE IN DOWNWARD DOG! JUST YOU WATCH, SHITTY WOMAN!” 

You laugh as he childishly stomps off, gripping his palms tight to keep from exploding.

Way too easy.

Bakugou ended up taking Midoriya down in downward dog. Nobody saw it coming, but you. He thanked you with a movie date and a kiss at the end of the night. 😊