#will make a big ol compilation of these eventually | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

unexpectedbrickattack · 1 year

Text

Compiling some Peppino-centric hcs i have bc i would like to have something to look back on as a point of reference 😌 (this is so long. SO fucking long. Im sorry)

- starting w the basics: hes a short king; 5’2 (157cm). Hes like late 40s-early 50s to me. Hes got brown eyes i never draw bc i like drawing him w dots lol. Hes particular about his appearance and grooms very consistently. Has literally no issues w balding (exposed to balding bears in his youth; thinks they are hot now 😌) and it helps that he can literally cave someones skull in if they speak ill of him. He does have a couple of comfy hats incase his hair decides to be unruly in bad weather.

- very bulky build; think of olympic strongmen/ highland games but short. Visibly muscular arms and broad shoulder, fat chest and stomach, smoother legs (fat layered over muscle; v thick thighs and calves). Hes got surgery scars on his lower back from a bullet wound (only entry/no exit point). Debated giving him a scar around his sternum from heart surgery or some other crazy injury he had but im not sure yet; the bullet extraction scar is definitely staying tho.

-does NOT work out; he used to wrestle in his late teens/early 20s but otherwise he was (still is) a man who did lots of physical labor around his childhood home and grandparents shop. Continued the cycle when he got his own home and his own restaurant; cheaper to do his own (extensive) repairs than call for specialists/contractors when u are Fucking Poor.

- he DOES exercise; he is fond of jogging. He does this alot postgame, usually in the early mornings before he opens, and at the beach on his days off. He had it drilled in v early in his life that he Needs to stay active, so he will roll out of bed and do this almost daily. On his days off he will have random people come and join him; usually pepperman or noisette. Its too tedious/boring of a task for gus and noise, and vigi is out cold until sunrise at minimum.

- he owns a HOUSE; he does not rent an apartment. This is bc i think it would be reasonable to assume that anyone who OWNS a restaurant was at some point, well off enough to own a house instead of renting. And i like the idea of him using this house as collateral; if the shop goes under, so does his home (more stress for him…). (Ive seen other people treat his shop like a duplex ie shop on the lobby level and an apartment/living space on the second floor. This is ALSO v good and coincides w my want to have his home tied to his restaurant)

- the house is small; two bedrooms, 2 1/2 baths, and a basement (where the 1/2 bath is located). BIG kitchen, small livingroom. It is surprisingly well furnished bc of his family donating things to him when he bought the house in his 30s. Lots of older wood based furniture. Hes not grossly messy (like food, bugs, etc) but he is disorganized beyond belief. Lives an ‘organized mess’ lifestyle bc of his high stress. Also extremely apathetic to his living conditions until postgame when his restaurant starts to take in profits again; less stress -> more positive time at home -> aware of the clutter as he spends more time at home.

- drives a beat up lookin car to and from work. Its his BABY; his ol reliable. He has to do lots of work to keep her intact and functioning. Eventually gets a newer car with his profits, but its rlly to help ease the strain on her so that he can take her out for drives occasionally.

-eldest of like 6 siblings; will not try to name them all just know that hes the only boy. Eldest daughter is only a year younger than him. Good relationship w all of them and his immediate family. Very matriarchal immediate family. Only a handful of uncles, his dad, and his grandpappy. Stubbornly cut off contact w everyone after the horrors (war) and refused to accept help w his failing restaurant (prideful). Eventually his (eldest) sister reaches out and he makes amends one at a time. (Gets an earful from his momma)

- works LONG hours. Awake by 4am, in noisettes cafe by 5am, in the shop by 6am. Preps and calls until opening at 9am. Closes at 9pm. Closes up FOR REAL at 10pm. Rinse n repeat. As the shop does better financially, he starts opening later and closing earlier (at the insistence of Gus). He still does his walks and his morning routine, just a little later, and he has enough time at home in the evening to cook for himself.

- on the topic of cooking, he is a good chef all around; pizza is just easier to market and consistently do Correct. Likes food alot. So much…..he isnt picky but he does go 😬 when eating something. Bad. And it happens Often.

- stress baked often. He felt bad about throwing out his food afterwards so he would give it away to his neighbors. No longer stress bakes but he will cook out of boredom which is not as bad but still not the best 😭 luckily he has so many freeloaders that will eat anything he makes (gus and noise)

- this is his second shop; the first one was in a larger city (think similar to pig city). Closed down due to insufficient payments, but reopened on the outskirts of the city (close to the forest) after putting up his house as collateral.

-first shop is where he first meets pizzahead. Hes offered a generous sum of cash to sell the business (which would then be converted into a ph brand shop). Obv declined. Later offered a position in pizzaheads business instead; nearly killed the man when scaring him out of his shop.

- Peppino is NOT some aggressive out of control beast (despite what pizzahead believes). He is vaguely neurotic and it is exacerbated by extreme stress and bouts of anxiety. So funny how removing the extreme stress and sources of anxiety makes him more Normal. (Somewhat encouraged by an official image i saw after i made this hc of peppinos attitude outside and inside the tower. He is relatively apathetic and inside the tower he is borderline manic. More hcs about that too)

- he is relatively fun to be with otherwise. He has some extremely dry humor. Hes incredibly sarcastic. He LIKES customer service…otherwise this would be impossible for him to endure. It helps that he Owns a shop, instead of only being a worker; he can yell at people who are rude and annoying to him and he knows (at least postgame) that he has loyal regulars.

- he is a bit of an asshole; he make snide remarks he shouldnt and hes been in his own fair share of fights bc of it. Has mellowed out drastically as he got a better grip on his emotions postgame. Only the most tolerant could really deal w him prior to postgame (gus) in part due to his anger (response to exacerbated neurosis and ptsd)

- also autistic. Extra stress bc of this. Easily overstimulated and the response to this is anger. Completely undiagnosed lmao but hes like late 40s; he just learned how to deal with it.

-common stress responses: bites on anything, usually his hand (Tried stopping this bc people would TOUCH him if he did that in front of others and that just made shit worse). Grinds his teeth. Jaw clenching. Making A Fist So Tight You Accidentally Cut Urself. Flappy hands, usually w hands balled up into a fist (specifically eyes closed; jaw clenched; head ducked, flappy hands over his ducked head). It looks ‘worse’ than biting but at least the excessive movement deters people from touching him.

- on a more positive note; knows quite a bit of magic tricks. Sleight of hand stuff is his forte. It is good for the anxiety and it keeps his hands busy. He is will consistently say that he is not good w kids but he loves entertaining them; they say the funniest shit and he likes being a bad influence on them 😈. Also teaching them tricks and letting them see behind the curtain is so fun for him; like they are so excited about silly tricks and it makes him feel a little cool….

- he is the kind of person whos like (dad voice) ‘not gettin a damn cat in my house’ and then has blackmail of him passed the fuck out with a cat on his stomach. He feeds the local strays by his shop and he cant help but feed the strays that end up by his house. He doesnt feel confident enough to take care of another animal when its so hard for him to remember to take care of himself so for now he just feeds them. But maybe soon he will take them inside…he also baby talks cats but if u caught him doing that he would kill u i think. (Pov u are the noise)

- silly hc that he has a real last name but he keeps it as spaghetti bc its funny to fuck around w people who ask him. No i dont know what his last name would be but i think it would be funny to have him ‘change’ it for branding and have people believe it. Also i think its funny to think of peppino saying this to ph somehow and he completely runs with it as gospel. Like ‘granny did u KNOW his last name is fucking spaghetti??’

- wrt young peppino, i say that w him being 20-23 in mind. Worked in his grandparents shop during this time. Worked as a line cook for some other restaurants as well (and saved up money to buy his own home while he lived w his parents and sisters). He was generally a sweetheart, just a bit odd (the Autsim and Anxiety), but that was (and still is) his charm point lol

- (SUGGESTIVE) cannot stop thinking of him as a little otter that hung out w older bears in the leather scene. He prob had his best years w them before he had to focus on other shit. He still keeps in contact w some of the peeps that were around his age postgame, and they meet up sometimes to hang along w vigilante. Now that hes older it is a bit surreal to now be the bear he used to look up to in his younger years. But its a bit flattering. Noise and Pepperman are younger than him and they both regard him w the same kind of wonder he used to give older bears. He thinks its cute lol (pepperman bc thats his muse and he sees his body type as PEAK human form, and noise bc i hc him as a bit sheltered despite the fame)

- (STILL SUGGESTIVE BUT THATS IT I SWEAR) adjacent to this; its weird for him to come back to this side of him bc hes been living in survival mode for over a decade. Got his house in his early 30s -> WAR -> comes back traumatized -> leaves family to cope -> dumps money into a restaurant to cope w leaving family. So he kinda missed it alot. Its fun to explore it w gus heehee and sometimes noise when he behaves.

-other things i wanted to mention but didnt know where to fit it. Peppino is a decent artist; he drew the logo for his shop and in general he is good at caricatures (another thing he can do to entertain a crowd; helps w anxiety to know how to not be awkward).

- Peppino is a bit of a mechanic (aka he learned bc he was broke and didnt want to call them for minor problems). Hes not a tinkerer but he likes the joy of creating sm and will make little. Creations. every once in a while. One of these creations is Peshino! He is a wooden windup toy made as a prototype for a more mechanical, mass produced version. He was intended to be sold as a cute little toy to help cement the branding for Peppinos shop but he never got the time or money for it, so peshino is collecting a bit of dust in his basement. Postgame, he takes peshino out and cleans him up; he feels a bit guilty about him….and the Big Peshino found in the tower plays music in Peppinos shop :) He also takes the time to clean him up and keep him functional.

Okay i think thats all i got for now byebye

#mine #peppino #um #runs away cutely….#i know i am missing sm but waugh #please ask me about these if ur curious….i am unable to draw and my insistence to draw out hcs stops me from sharing anything #so i am going to try and make these for alot of characters and then make a pinned for them if possible #posting these at the worst time possible LMAO but i want this Out #will reblog tomorrow at a better time #okay gn if u read this i love u…

122 notes · View notes

ecto-hazard · 2 years

Text

THE HFJONE DEHUMANIZED AU

***BIG OL FUCKIN SPOILERS FOR THE FINALE AND SERIES AS A WHOLE***

Behold!!! The masterpost!!!

Overwhelmed by the amount of shit about this au that's scattered across my different social medias? Well I'm gonna compile all that shit here baby.

And now for the first time ever anywhere: the shit about Airy.

Basics:

The batch 1 contestants were all originally human. Everyone on their version of earth is human, not objects

Upon being brought to the plane, batch 1 contestants were transformed into their respective objects and stay that way until they can go back to their earth

The form characters take in the waiting room is reflective of their internal view of themself

General Story and How the Universe Works:

(Aka the Airy stuff)

Airy was a human on earth. He dies in the truck crash and goes to the waiting room.

Airy messed with the radio for a bit, and it turns out that in some universes, your form changes to sort of adapt to it.

Airy finds the forest dimension place. Here, inexplicably, he takes the form of a lamp. It's weird but he's been wandering around for so long and this place is nice so he goes with it. Eventually gets used to it, especially since there's not really any bodily needs to worry about now.

General plot of ONE plays out the same, he makes the plane and summons the first season contestants. Like him, in this universe they become objects and freak out about it. The contestants get killed by accident and Airy starts over.

Fast forward to the events at the start of One. Airy teleports the batch 1 people and they have to deal with being literally dehumanized by him. Which is like super jarring obviously cause they all have these new bodies suddenly so on top of the already weird competition, they have to adjust to not being human anymore

The Incident tm occurs and many contestants are trapped on the plane for a while. This makes Liam and Amelia notably lose their sense of being human and become content with being objects

Liam returns to earth after so long to suddenly being human again and doesn't know how to cope. He finds Bryce and even though they don't initially recognize each other, they figure out who they are and work together to do the rest of the shit.

When they get to the waiting room, since their forms are a reflection of the view of the self, Bryce is more human while Liam’s just. Backpack. Shenanigans and angst ensue

The rest of the plot is more or less implicit. There’s just another layer of shenanigans that oh so conveniently covers a layer of suffering

Some specific character things that are totally still up for interpretation:

As a human, Charlotte suffers from a fungal infection she got from a head injury

Julien spent so long trying to get home in the waiting room, he lost all sense of identity at all and just became a haze

Variants of this au that people seem to enjoy

Permabackpack: Liam (and sometimes other characters) stay in their waiting room forms after they get back to earth

Batch 1 + 2 earth: Batch 2 contestants also come from the Batch 1 Earth, but are living objects from that earth and not humans

I think that’s the gist of it. Sorry if the formatting on here is whack. Will update with other info if needed

#grey art #hfjone #dehumanized au #hfjone spoilers

930 notes · View notes

shintorikhazumi · 3 years

Text

“Diana.”

A/N: To be honest, I had wanted this to be a Diana-centric fic, from Diana’s perspective. I struggled to find a concept, and had a little help from a friend who sent me a random generator. (Thanks, Kate :>) And when I thought I’d just choose from a randomly generated idea, I came across this video on youtube which was actually a compilation of a tiktok series of the story of two neighbors. Of course, I changed bits of it, and obv the end so if you think you know what the source vid is, dw. I won’t hurt y’all like that ;-; And I’ll just link it at the bottom so no plot spoilers for those who don’t know what it is. Eyyyy.

This fic has a few song recs for y’all to listen to if you haven’t heard them already, lol. ;)

I had been looking for something... “emotional” for Diana’s bday fic. And I think... this works. At least for me, it does. It’s not from Diana’s perspective, but... I think this works. So without further ado, Happy birthday Diana and...

oh, thank you to @tracedinairlwa for some help with the music :> that y’all will see later in the fic :’>. Without further ado,

Enjoy?

~Shintori Khazumi

It all started with a sunset and a few familiar notes from a piano.

No, it isn’t Akko’s piano. Her piano has been sitting in a corner of her room, collecting dust- untouched for months. And that is just the thing. Unless her piano has somehow become cursed and has decided to ghostly play on its own, then there had to be some other source.

The source of that gentle sound, Akko eventually pinpoints, is her apartment wall- or more accurately, what lies beyond that separator.

As she sits on her couch, admiring the expressive tones, her mind has decided that it wants to capture this special moment, and keep it stored lest she never experiences it again.

Making a quick dash for her bedroom, she opens her bedside drawer and fishes for her old camera from her university days in film club, back when she was an actual student of the Arts and all that creative jazz. She has tried to maintain it, but being under lockdown allows her few chances of seeing the outside world, and the few corners of her home don’t exactly spark ‘inspiration’ for any project.

Dusting the device off gently, she takes it back to the living room, placing it on her coffee table facing herself. She clicks the record button, thinking of making an introduction; but she quickly abandons that idea as she realizes it may take away from the sounds she wants to ring more apparent on tape.

Maybe she can just edit a few captions later on her laptop. Yes. That sounds good.

So she sits.

And the notes kept playing.

[Video Diary(?) Diary? Is this a Diary? Day... Day 1. I hope it’s only Day 1. I hope there’s a day 2. And a three... and a five.

So anyway, Akko here. And uh... I got a new neighbor, I think. He/she plays the piano. I do too (kinda. Haven’t done that in a while, hehe).

I don’t know why I recorded this... this must seem like I’m being a creep, but... They just... played Chariot’s Melancholy from my favorite show and... it felt sadder than usual. The sound felt sorrowful. I don’t know...

I’m... moved.]

//-//-//-//-//

She does not know what compels her today, to slip that message under her neighbors door; but before she can even think about her actions, they’d already been done.

A simple, “can you please play ‘Ease My Mind’ by Ben Platt, maybe?” haphazardly scrawled on a piece of notebook paper is delivered with the anxious feelings of an interaction-craving Akko, starved of a social life since all this pandemic misfortune began.

She is sure she no longer knows how to string a proper introduction together after nearly a year of being by her lonesome.

This is about to change however. Starting today.

Maybe.

She counts down the hours ‘til sunset.

[Day 2! Yey! So uh... I kind of... went on the attack- no! I didn’t attack anyone! I just... You know how I have a new neighbor that plays the piano? I sent that neighbor a note.

And you might think that’s all fine and cute, but... I’ve never even met my neighbor... but...

I love his/her music. So much.

And I told them. On the note, of course. Duh, Akko.

I asked them to play ease my mind and... they did.

As you can hear in the video... I guess it was a yes. :>

...They eased my mind...

-Akko]

//-//-//-//-//

She wants to try something today.

She has been thinking about it the past few days after continually being blessed with such beautiful music. Music that had attracted her like moth to a flame. The piano’s daily sunset singing compels her to come reunite with her own.

She had wiped it clean earlier in the morning and now sits awkwardly on the bench, punching down a random note here and there.

What a nostalgic tone.

The C major scale then the G. She plays it. A few arpeggios to warm up. F sharp major doesn’t sound too good, with her fingers tangling up as she traverses the scale. What was the fingering supposed to be like again? Right. Start with the fourth and second finger on the left and right hand respectively.

That sounds much better.

She hums a few tunes, choosing from a playlist arranged in her mind. She settles on something gentle and sweet. A Yiruma song. Just to get the feeling back in her hands.

A river flows as notes along the plain that is her silent room, adorning the quiet flourishes and curves, bringing color to her atmosphere.

She misses this. This tingle in her heart as music fills up her entire soul, not allowing her to think of anything else but this exact moment.

Yes.

This... This is nice.

And Akko plays until the sunset comes.

She can’t wait for it to come.

[Day 6. I... I haven’t played the piano in a while, and I’m a little rusty. But brave ol’ Akko here thought it’d be great to ask for a duet from the virtuoso across the drywall, haha. I left a note...

And I though we had something going. I was excited... I said that they could play once I stopped my part, but... did they forget? Or I guess they didn’t hear me.

It’s okay... I can try again tomorrow.

I hope. Tomorrow...

-This has been Akko.]

//-//-//-//-//

She excitedly videos this weekend ‘meet-up’.

Akko still doesn’t know who lives across the wall, but she sure knows his or her favorite songs by now, hearing it daily at the same sunset hours.

She admires the music, as usual, but this time it’s different. This time, they had sent her a note. An apology for missing out last time.

They request a duet with her, to make up for it. Of course, Akko accepts. And now she starts it off, praying and hoping her sound is heard through the barrier that keeps their music apart.

She ends her part of the duet, waiting in the most agonizing few seconds of silence. She briefly worries that her neighbor had forgotten their proposition; or maybe they couldn’t hear her once more.

It’s fine, she thinks... It’s okay. She scratches her cheek, wondering if she should hold on until next time again-

There it is. That beautiful sound, so personal to the one living across the wall. A sound of emotion that could only belong to whoever it was living there.

Akko had never heard anyone else play the way her neighbor did.

She laughs, she feels herself tear up a little. It hurts so sweet in her chest. It’s a fizzy, bubbling excitement. It’s a stretched-out joy across her cheeks.

A success!

A beautiful one, indeed.

[Day 8: Akko here. My wish came true. I... got to play with my neighbor! Yay!

... Maybe I should go meet them now...]

//-//-//-//-//

They do it again.

Akko excitedly bounces in her warmed piano seat, listening to her neighbor go first this time around. She listens intently. Once the wall music stops, she starts. This was their agreement, their deal.

The river’s flow stills a moment, and that’s Akko’s cue to pick up the current’s pace once more.

She plays with shy gusto, caressing the keys in a way that shows how she’s fallen in love again. With the piano? With music? Yes. With- ...

Love, huh. It’s such perfect timing too.

Today is Valentine’s day.

Akko doesn’t know whether or not her neighbor has anyone special in her life like that, but if they share the same situation, all alone in their apartments, locked in by the pandemic, she just wants them to know she receives the message their music is trying to get across to one another.

Her heart feels it. It translates it.

It cherishes it.

[Day 13.

Dear Neighbor,

I just... wanted to share the words we’ve exchanged, not through any verbal means, but through the sounds that reverberate against the very foundations of our connected homes. Thank you for this message.

I know that music is... our way of simply saying

“I don’t know who you are ... But I’m here. You’re not Alone.” This is for you too.

-Sincerely, Akko.]

//-//-//-//-//

It is a challenge.

For Akko or for her neighbor, she doesn’t know. What she does know is that tomorrow is going to be the big day! She’s finally going to see the face behind the songs that have embraced her tenderly throughout the lonely struggle she hadn’t realized had weighed down on her so heavily.

The interactions they’ve had, the conversations, they brighten up her everyday, and Akko is somewhat afraid she’s gotten attached; addicted- if you will- to this unique bond she’s formed with another she has never actually met.

Her mind strays from her current piece, body autopiloting a song called, “Mind Conductor” that both of them just so happen to like, apparently. Another fact that makes Akko feel all giddy as they seem to share a taste in other media outside of music.

She feels herself vibrate with nerves and excitement.

It’s tomorrow. Tomorrow is the day.

[We’re Finally Meeting.

Tomorrow.]

//-//-//-//-//

Akko tells a story.

She’s met her neighbor, not knowing what to expect. Despite having a lack of said expectations, she could confidently say it was better than anything she could have anticipated.

She rolls up the sleeves of her flannel shirt, readying herself to write the melodious response to the already playing tune in the background of her video.

Though she tries to listen intently, waiting for her turn, she is distracted. She knows she is.

After meeting someone as wonderful as her neighbor.

Blonde hair and blue eyes invade her recall, flashes of a soft smile and calm voice playing over and over in her head.

Her neighbor is the most gorgeous woman she’s ever met. Breath-taking. Akko says this with utmost objectivity as her lungs struggle to function after first meeting the lady.

Hailing from Scotland, the twenty-five-year-old had introduced herself to Akko. They exchanged a few pleasantries, some questions and information.

Akko had asked how she’d never known she had such a talented neighbor, to which the response was an admission from the woman that she had just moved in and was only staying in the adjacent apartment temporarily while awaiting for a relative to come for her after selling their old house back in their hometown.

Her mother... rests. Having had a certain heart disease for a while, her immune system had proven very susceptible to the pandemic reaper that had claimed her life for its tallied count. She never knew her father, it seemed.

Akko’s heart breaks as she remembers these things.

“All I have left is the piano.”

That’s what she’d said to her earlier.

Akko’s fingers glide across the keys, playing her role in this drama for two.

“I play at sunset because my mother came home at that time from work... she was always stressed.

...I wanted to be of help to her. I was happy she loved it. As I grew up, it became a habit.”

Akko fumbles with a few keys, making a slight mistake. She hopes her neighbor can forgive her for being so distracted at the moment, and right after they’d finally met too.

“Thank you, Miss-”

“Akko is fine.”

“Thank you, Akko. You’re playing has, in truth, kept me motivated and less lonely.”

Akko remembers having promised before their parting to their respective units that she would keep playing with her until she moves out.

Akko blushes upon remembering the stunning smile she was offered afterwards.

Her neighbor had been camera shy and so Akko didn’t get the opportunity for a picture. She hopes for the best in the future. She’ll try again if ever the lovely lady was ready.

They have time, anyway.

They do.

[Day 20, folks! Akko here, writing another video caption entry, Diary, thing... haha. The song playing right now in the video is gorgeous right? It’s... her favorite song. It’s called, ‘In case you don’t live forever’. She said it keeps her loser to her mother. It keeps her in her heart.

She plays so beautifully...

She’s just as beautiful. She’s amazing.

She’s... a special soul.

I feel goosebumps.

I’m glad. For her. Her music doesn’t sound as sorrowful as when I first heard it. It’s still every bit as emotional, though. I could cry. Really, I could...

...I’m so happy she’s healing.

It’s a process, but... I’ll be here. I’ll be here for her.

I’ll be here for you,

“Diana.”]

//-//-//-//-//

There are times when Akko thinks she’d like to get to know her neighbor more, a little more chatting, a few more minutes talking.

However, it always seems as though there’s this unspoken rule. This... ‘don’t-get-too-close’, ‘don’t-ask-more-than-you-should’. It’s like a boundary that keeps Akko from learning more, discovering more.

Neither of them purposely meet-up outside their closed doors either, this lockdown and what-not all up in their face.

They see each other around the building sometimes, wave a hand, shake a plastic bag of groceries, but building protocols don’t really allow loitering in the halls, and Akko feels she’d be crossing a line in inviting the girl over, and she doesn’t see herself getting invited instead either.

Despite this longing, she isn’t all too dissatisfied with the current standing of their relationship. Peculiar as it may be, she rather likes this.

A relationship built on a communication based on raw emotion delivered through their music.

If Akko ponders it deeply, it’s quite an intimate relationship, what they have. Thoughts and feelings in their purest form- unspoken, but not hidden.

She might not know too much about Diana. She may not know much of her past, or even her present, or general objective facts about the woman.

But what Akko does feel she knows is Diana’s heart.

And Akko knows its utterly beautiful.

//-//-//-//-//

Moonlight Sonata has never felt so sad to her; its sounds reflecting something they both felt, Akko believed.

Akko feels her heart clench and ache in her chest, her face a little hot and her palms sweating.

Only a week left before the clock strikes twelve and the magic is broken.

Diana is finally moving out.

It is... their final duet.

How unfortunate.

Akko sighs, thinking about the pain she’ll feel later as she edits this portion of the video. Compared to the happy tones and build ups of all the others, this... is something she doesn’t know if she can do.

Maybe she can ask Amanda for a favor this time around?

She’s actually shown some of her closest friends her video logs, and they all had sent kind messages to Akko’s new friend, who in turn, felt worlds and worlds happier.

Akko feels happy as well.

Diana’s joy is contagious. It shows through her expressive music that gives away the feelings her face doesn’t show.

Speaking of Diana’s face... she still hasn’t agreed on showing her face on camera. Akko supposes it’s still too early. Maybe before she leaves? Oh Akko hopes so. She wants to have something to look at physically to remember Diana by. Not that she’d ever forget.

Still, a little memory help never hurt anyone.

Diana’s turn comes in smoothly through the wall, Akko unable to keep her smile from forming.

She’s going to miss this. The playing; the sometimes awkward, but unconventionally amazing duets; the letters shoved underneath door; and the very rare hallway meet-up where Akko can only smile at Diana as they exchange a literal word or two.

Akko reminisces.

The past... two months now, have been amazing. Incredible. Life-changing. Akko wonders what the future has in store for them both after they part.

Maybe they could meet again. Someday. Somehow. Somewhere.

Akko knows she’ll keep playing still. At the same time, on a weekend, as the sunsets. For Diana. She’s promised she’ll keep making the video logs. She’ll send them over to her so that they can still keep this music alive in some way.

//-//-//-//-//

[Day 62.

Hi, Diana. It’s me, Akko.

I... wrote you a song...? Or well, I started to... I’m not quite done yet, hihi. Got a little too ambitious and all... thought I could add some other instruments besides our- the piano... aha..haha...

When you first told me your story, I started picturing it out. A life dyed with all the colors of the spectrum. From the vivids to the grays, it was such a lovely imagery in my minds eye. A painting I could not get out of my head.

And so this song is... yeah. That.

A story.

A story about this wonderful twenty-five-year-old woman who so happened to move next door to this uninspired artist. She’d lost her mother to a stupid virus, and she’d never known her father. Her house got sold, and she had only one distant relative she knew of left.

She spends her days along in a box of white walls and empty silence. That is, until the sun decides to rest for the day, and it sends its golden rays of energy to the girl and to her piano that she thought to be her sole companion in this tragedy.

She plays her favorite songs, filling the emptiness with her own emotions; making the intangible manifest itself and cause a dumb girl next door to one day slip a scratch of paper underneath her door, asking for a song.

A note with a request... and with a message that she’d heard her feelings- her loneliness; and that she’d never let her be alone anymore.

And that’s how they became friends, huh, Diana?

Two pianos, Two people, and a wall that keeps them apart.

They didn’t know who was playing on the other side. But did it matter?

In this dreary, blackened time of the world,

‘You can be the light of somebody else’ darkness, so keep shining.’.

Dear Diana,

In case my playing isn’t as emotionally expressive as yours, I hope you at least know this now. Through this video.

That you were, and are... my light.

-Akko.

P.S. I hope I finish the song and give it to you before you leave.]

//-//-//-//-//

She feels herself hyperventilating, her vision bleary. She can barely stand. She feels like vomiting, and dying, and screaming all at once.

Her anxieties run rampant all over the room.

If this keeps up, she may as well hurt herself beyond help.

She trudges over to the one thing that could ground her at the moment.

The piano.

Her hands are shaky as they do multiple attempts to turn on the keyboard, hitting the wrong buttons and turning the volume knob up too loud that when Akko accidentally leans against the keyboard, hand pressing down on many keys, the sound almost blows up her eardrums.

She curses, smashing a hand against those same keys, the cluster of notes echoing through her apartment walls.

“aaaaAAAAGGHHHHHHHH!!!!”

She allows the scream to tear out of her throat; emotions, wild horses finally released into the open.

“AGH! AGGHHHH!!! RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH”

She falls face first onto the keys, now ignoring the loudness of their noise, momentarily thinking it would be better to allow her ears to bleed out so she’d never hear a thing again.

She wants something, anything, to drown out the pain she feels right now.

...

She sobs against the keys, head lifting as she apologizes to her piano, wiping off the tears that are quickly replaced by fresh ones.

Akko gives up and plays a note. Then two.

Then she’s playing ‘you’ll be in my heart’ and she’s crying more.

She lets herself cry as she plays.

Today, she was supposed to see Diana off. She had left a final note the day before yesterday, asking if she could do so. Help Diana carry her things, maybe swap numbers, and just... maybe keep this connection going for years to come.

Last night, she’d said good night at Diana’s door.

The girl gave her the sweetest smile, an almost unnoticeable blush on her features.

Oh, but Akko noticed anyway.

Of course, she would. With how shamelessly she stared at Diana at that moment.

Diana laughed, stepping closer and patted Akko on the cheek- kissed her there- before turning about to shut the door, along with the lights Akko saw go off from underneath it.

She was excited for the morning.

But when morning came... Diana was gone.

Akko had been thrown into confusion and a frantic state that she’d bolted all around, searching for signs or a left behind message.

Nothing.

She had then run down to ask the land lady, and that’s where she’d found out.

The heart disease Diana’s mother had was hereditary.

Diana had had an attack, and with an emergency alerting device, she’d been able to contact her only family, and had been taken to the hospital.

That was good.

That gave Akko relief and joy.

...so why is she despairing now?

...She didn’t know.

No, not the reason for her despair. She knows that.

The reason she was in this state is because she didn’t know.

She didn’t know what had happened.

She didn’t know Diana had suddenly disappeared in the middle of the night.

She didn’t know where she was, or where whoever took her.

She didn’t know that Diana had that heart disease too.

She didn’t know because she never got to ask.

She never got to learn more, know more.

... Did she not know Diana then?

Her mind taunts her, her heart hurts her.

She doesn’t know a lot about Diana. Not as much as she thinks.

That’s what they tell her.

For all the emotions they’d exchanged through music, that was the extent of it. Had Akko been too presumptuous in thinking she’d known Diana so deeply because of what they’d shared?

When in reality she may as well be a random stranger playing her show tunes and disturbing her neighbors.

Akko almost believes it.

But no... no. She can’t do that. She can’t assume those things. Not about their connection. Not about Diana.

Because Diana had told her once upon a song that she- that Akko had been her light. Her comfort. Akko believes in Diana. So she believes these feelings as well.

Yet these feelings of her own were so conflicting, so daunting. They battle in her mind, questioning and justifying every little thing. All things relating to Diana. Diana and... Diana.

Akko coughs out a few more sobs, throat incredibly dry.

She stops playing for a moment, dragging herself to the kitchen for a glass of water.

Then she goes back to the piano.

She... doesn’t feel like playing again.

What should she play anyway?

What song does she want to play? What song... Song... Song... Diana... What was Diana’s favorite song?

Diana? Song? A song for Diana? A song about-

Akko falls off her piano bench as she scrambles for her coffee table, sighing in relief as the papers for her composition are still there.

With shaky hands, she takes the sheets and a pencil and brings them over to the piano.

And she writes a few notes, then a few bars.

Diana.

Who is Diana.

What does Akko not know about her. Her other struggles? Her sickness? Her trials and her fears? Her past?

That melody... sounded too sad for a parting gift. Akko doesn’t want Diana to feel more sorrow when she moves out...

Then....

What does Akko know? About Diana?

“Diana is...”

Expressive, emotional.

Diana is intelligent, an intellectual.

Diana is sincere and sweet.

Diana is talented and tasteful in music.

Diana is... her neighbor, her... new friend,

....Akko’s... what?

What was she to Akko?

“You are my light.”

-Akko ends up writing as a title.

But that’s a little too embarrassing to give to someone who was just your neighbor and a new friend... right?

And maybe it didn’t exactly represent the whole thing Akko had written.

So she erases it, biting her pencil as she tries to come up with a new name, a new caption for this creation.

What could it be. That describes Diana in her entirety; her life, her struggles, her joys.

Who is she? Who is Akko’s neighbor?

Akko scratches her head in frustration, wracking her brains even more.

With a sigh, she replies to herself aloud, the simplest, somewhat plain, and stupidly obvious answer.

“Well, she’s Diana.”

And it clicks.

That she is.

She is Diana.

And Akko throws on a jacket, a mask, and some shoes and thinks no more.

//-//-//-//-//

[Dear Diana,

I know very little about you

But you’ve changed my life.

Really you have.

You gave me back my passion, and a little bit more of that even. Maybe aroused a new passion within me.

I’d say, “You’ll be in my heart”, but that sounds too much of a farewell, to be honest.

And I’d rather not say goodbye just yet.

Not like this.

Music... Is a powerful thing. Despite the rampaging emotions I’d felt as I found out what had happened to you today, I- I kept playing. It grounded me. It helped me.

Diana, you once told me I was your light.

And you know I’ve told you already. That you’ve been MINE.

Diana. This video might look incredibly shaky and chaotic.

But please forgive me for that, and know that it is because I’m running with all my might to find out where you are. I got a hint for the hospital you might have been taken too.

It kinda seems like I’m a stalker now, huh?

I’m sorry. I just... I-

I can’t say goodbye to you....

Not just yet...

I still... have a song for you.

So... wait for me?”]

//-//-//-//-//

Eyes blink, bright white melting into color. They scan the room, looking for hints to identify her location.

Her body aches, her chest hurts. Her throat is parched. Her head is throbbing.

What is that annoying beeping sound-

Ah. Of course.

The hospital.

Again.

She hates it. She hates the smell of antiseptic and sterile sheets. She hates the taste of badly prepared hospital meals, and too-dry food.

The water has this strange quality to it when you’re in the hospital.

She knows this well.

She hates that she does.

She sighs, sinking into her pillows. At least those are comfortable.

Ugh.

What bad timing, really. For an attack.

She was supposed to move out today. She was supposed to meet with her aunt- who actually has probably met up with her by now, seeing as Diana is in a hospital and her usual alert device seems to be charging within reach beside her. Also she sees Daryl’s purse on the seat.

Maybe the woman had gone out temporarily for something important.

That was fine.

It just meant Diana was left alone again. If only for a short while.

...Alone, huh.

These past two months, she hadn’t been that.

All because of one girl, one Atsuko Kagari that she’d met by chance through a piano and through a wall. The sound quite literally carrying over through a wall.

Diana can’t believe she used to be so skeptical of thin-walled living spaces, wondering how people kept their privacy.

Now, however, she feels blessed that that was the case.

Else she’d never have met... her light.

That’s right.

When everything, her vision, her hopes, her heart had steadily been dying out, through her dim came a glow. That glow was the connection she’d found through her neighbor across a wall.

It had surprised her the first time she realized someone was playing alongside her one sunset session, months ago. She would have thought it creepy had the person’s music been any less captivating.

There were just so many colors in the music, there was just so much warmth. It sounded a little rough, a few hinges rusty at first; but it came along after a few pseudo duets, and then Diana had found these duets to be a staple in her life.

Then she met Akko for the first time, and more warmth and color came into her life.

Diana found herself enjoying the musical conversations they had, intrigued by thoughts that they were actually able to communicate in that way and understand one another to that extent, no words attached.

And she enjoyed these nonverbal bonding moments.

But when they actually wrote to one another, or when they’d have their short greetings when they’d meet up in the hall, Diana found herself wanting to draw even closer, to get to know Akko even more.

And when Akko asked if she could do the same, Diana had found it so easy to open up.

She’d loved to know even more about the girl.

But how would she do it now?

They didn’t have the chance to exchange numbers, and Diana was probably moving as soon as she left the hospital. Her things were already being shipped to her new home, after all. There wasn’t much reason to return to her apartment, really.

“Idiot. Stupid, Diana. Not asking her sooner. What are you supposed to do no-”

Two knocks on her door.

It doesn’t open right away. It doesn’t seem to open at all.

Diana deduces it’s not a doctor or nurse then. And it might not be Daryl either because the woman would have already called the attending nurse to open the door already.

So then, who could it be?

Diana tries not to let her mind wander and get her hopes up, because there is no way- just no way- it’s who she hopes it will be.

The door opens, and her breath is unexpectedly bated- and she releases it, seeing it’s just the janitor.

Trying not to let disappointment leak into her tone, she greets him a good mor-

“I’m glad... I was right.... hah... hah... You’re here... Diana.”

And Diana really shouldn’t just assume things such as being wrong, and that maybe her neighbor was a creep two months back.

Because now her neighbor, all frazzled, sweaty, and out of breath, is right there in front of her, a bunch of papers crumpled in one hand as the other is held over her heart, trying to calm herself.

“You... hah... didn’t let m-me... Sa-ha-y goodbye... so... you’re not allowed... to leave me waiting in silence and never respond...” Akko huffs. “There’s no more wall preventing you from using words now.”

Her breathing finally slows, and she manages to look up.

“I still have a song for you, after all.”

Diana doesn’t realize, nor does she feel the tears flowing down her face.

Akko doesn’t either.

“L-Let me know what you think... It’s my first song and all...” She becomes this shy blushing school girl as she approaches Diana’s bedside, awkwardly handing over the worn pieces of paper, all wrinkled up from whatever adventure Akko had been on prior to arriving here. “... then maybe we could play a duet again or something...”

She mumbles it so quietly Diana almost didn’t catch it.

She smiles.

She doesn’t think about the reality that was supposed to occur today had she not been taken to the hospital.

Virtual duets aren’t really her thing. She much prefers hearing sound in person, in real-time. She prefers the ability to adapt and adjust to play alongside someone; to feel expression and emotion first hand; to experience a duet in full.

So it’s a simple reply that she has ready, along with a smile on her face as she takes Akko’s hand in hers.

“I’d love that.”

//-//-//-//-//

Diana has told her many times that it’s thanks to her that she was able to recover as quickly as she did, and be out of the hospital in only a week.

Akko sheepishly denies that every time.

They’re both just glad things seem to settle to be alright now.

Diana leans her head against Akko’s shoulder as they share a pair of earphones, listening to the composition play on the latter’s laptop.

“I love it.”

“I know. You’ve told me that the past 4 months, everyday.”

“And I will continue to.”

Akko tries her best to hide the smile that had grown on her face, but it’s impossible. It comes out in laughs and a few soft tears, and she rubs her head against Diana’s.

“You have all the time to, it seems.”

“Yes, and I won’t waste it.” Diana quips, turning her head up to look at Akko with the tenderest of smiles. “Care to play?”

Akko simply smiles, before wrapping Diana up in a hug so deep, and warm, and tender. Without a word, she stands them both up, walking them over to two keyboards now positioned side-by-side.

They take seat. With eyes meeting, and a small nod, they begin.

They don’t need words to figure out the rhythm they’ll fall into, or what they should do, or who plays what part for today.

Akko’s colors seep out, her warmth embedded in her music. Diana’s expressive emotions tell Akko all she needs to know, and they play in harmony.

Together, they tell a story.

A story that began with a sunset and a few familiar notes from a piano.

A story about its music and what lay beyond a wall.

A story once called, “Diana”.

Now,

“Diana and Akko”.

A/N: .... Hrmmm... I didn’t like how i ended it, tbh,,, hahaha. I just... lost my thought process now. I’m tired and lost.

Anyway.

Based off this story

The follow-up to this won’t be now, or anytime too soon. Or tbh, I could just end it like this. But there’s this ache in my heart that wants to know what happens next as well. Or more things such as how Diana ended up staying. But well,

...who knows.

Bye for now.

~Shintori Khazumi

#diakko #dianakko #lwa #Little Witch Academia #diana bday fic #sorry it's sloppy #fanfic #diana cavendish #kagari atsuko

62 notes · View notes

fullmetalscullyy · 3 years

Text

tysm for the tag @hanamuri and @roseofbattles i appreciate it friends <333

How many works do you have on AO3? 86

What's your total AO3 word count? 1,462,725 😳

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. royai collections - rated: m. just a big ol’ collection of royai oneshots grouped together. idk how i ended up with 100 chapters of random oneshots haha i never imagined i would get that far w them but it’s so Neat seeing all of them compiled together

2. the way it was - rated: m. family royai, royai!kid, canon divergence, “what if riza never joined the military”. my babie. my child. this was a long process to work through but it was so much fun to play about with canon events where royai are married, have a kid, and how much things may change for them both. i think this is the one i’m most proud of overall. so much effort was poured into it. for years this fic was an idea i wanted to tackle and i’ve never felt peace and satisfaction quite like it when i wrapped it all up at the end

3. let you love me - rated: t. family royai, royai!kid, modern au. another one that is dear to me and has been for a long time. i have a playlist for this fic and whenever i listen to it i’m taken right back to the late summer/autumn i worked on it. the vibes are exquisite. this au was pure self indulgence, giving riza a kid and having roy move in next door to them both and royai slowly falling in love <3

4. hit and run - rated: m. historical au, enemies to lovers, basically riza being kickass and amazing w a Neat slowburn, if i do say so myself :)) this is another one i love to pieces and it comes a v v v close second to being my absolute fave story i’ve ever written. the idea was sparked by a trip into edinburgh old town’s ~haunted~ vaults and it was such a joy to write and draw on that experience for the setting. the vibes were perfect

5. closer - rated: t. ~drama central~. this ended up being much more popular than i imagined it would be lol i wanted to dabble in the OC, Jealous Girlfriend trope bc why not and sometimes we all need a wee bit of melodrama in our fic reading/writing lives <3

Do you reply to comments, why or why not? yes!! i love reading comments and people’s thoughts on what i’ve written omg they make my day every time. i want them to know their kindness is v much appreciated. even if it takes a while for me to get round to it bc of life, i will defo reply eventually!

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending? hmm idk i think all my fics are angst w a happy ending at the very least, apart from a few hurt/no comfort oneshots. for multi-chaptered fics i always tend to go with the happy ending. idk if i would have it in me to write a really angsty ending for a long fic haha

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending? hmm. there’s a few haha. probably the majority of my multichapter fics. so, i’ll choose the happiest fic in general, which has to be my inferno. pure, happy vibes and good times. singer riza killing it and pursuing her dreams while famous bf roy is nothing but supportive and her biggest fan

Do you write crossovers? If so, what's the craziest one you've ever written? no, i have not yet dabbled in a full blown crossover but idk if i ever will

Have you ever received hate on a fic? yeah lol

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? i did a few years ago but nothing for a long time

Have you ever had a fic stolen? not that i’m aware of

Have you ever had a fic translated? i’m not aware if anyone has gone ahead with translating anything. i did get a few questions about it last year (? i think) but idk if they ever did it

Have you ever co-written a fic before? yesss they’re so much fun!! i love working w my friends and creating new things!! i’m always down for it

What’s your all-time favourite ship? royai and msr baybeee

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? hmmm i would say txf royai au but. i’ve not even started it yet ;___; i really want to tho i just know it will take A Lot and i just. don’t have it in me atm. or the time in general. however, i am determined and won’t be so easily beaten. that’s another project i’ve wanted to do for years so one day i’ll get there

What are your writing strengths? i think writing soft royai. people seem to like my soft royai fics :’) and writing aus. i really enjoy working on aus and creating a new world for royai to run around in and be in love. i would like to think the worlds and plots are interesting enough for me to consider them a strength haha

What are your writing weaknesses? hmmMMM. (there’s a few but) descriptions of places the characters are in i feel like i lack a lot, but i am aware of it and if i was to tackle a big/long plot again that would be something to focus on improving. i could defo include more introspection but also. sometimes i just need to work w the vibe and not go that deep. it takes a lot out of me, however, i just need to practice!

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? i’ve never done it but i have been learning scottish gaelic for the last year and a half and i would love to be able to incorporate it in a fic somehow, but idk if it will ever be able to tie w a royai au haha. idk maybe i’ll just rewrite canon w them all speaking scottish slang that’ll be easy enough. edward elric @ truth: square go mate. @ viz media hmu for that translation anytime

What was the first fandom you wrote for? the x files

What’s your favourite fic you’ve written? hmmm for the longest time it was let you love me and while i still love it, i think it’s been beaten by the way it was and hit and run. i really can’t pick between the two of them. i’m a simple gal, i love riza and royai!family <3

tagging @firewoodfigs @tsaritsa @megthemighty @bringingglory @nightofnyx8 @niconiconina @vadeofspades but no pressure ofc <333

#tag meme

22 notes · View notes

davids-cartoon-corkboard · 4 years

Text

I have said a Lot about the “Raph is a system” theory over the past several months, so this is something of a compilation post. It’s got some new stuff, it’s got some old stuff. (You’re reading Part 1) (Part 2 is here) (Part 3 is here)

---

Firstly, “system” is the term for someone with Dissociative Identity Disorder, or DID. (The term can also apply to some folks with OSDD.) Someone might develop DID after experiencing long-term trauma at an early age- roughly five or six years old. To paraphrase the DSM-V:

1. We’ve seen three (possibly four) distinct personality states who speak, act, and perceive others differently.

2. The personality states, or “alters”, don’t necessarily share memory, and Donnie insinuated in “The Clothes Don’t Make the Turtle” that Raph has a bad memory in general.

3. Problems arise when alters don’t get along or aren’t on the same page. That none of them seem to be quite aware they’re a system doesn’t help either; it’s hard to work on communication and cooperation when you don’t know they need to be worked on!

4. This whole situation isn’t a normal part of a broadly accepted cultural or religious practice, or just Raph playing make-believe. (Though I wonder if he had “imaginary friends” when he was younger...)

5. It’s also not because Raph’s been smoking the devil’s lettuce or whatever. “Pizza Puffs” was one long weed joke and he was the only one “sober” (not poisoned) throughout! We don’t see this happen to other mutants, so it’s not a bizarre side effect of mutagen either.

(I’ve seen a few people joke that Mikey has “multiple personalities”, but that’s a tad yikesy and also just plain incorrect. His “doctor” personas are something he does deliberately, and youngest siblings are just Like That.)

So yeah, Raph is pretty heavily DID-coded. We’ve seen four alters so far:

“Host” Raph (HR): He’s our everyday Raph. A “host” is an alter who fronts most of the time and takes care of “business as usual” situations. They are often unaware of past traumatic events, such that they can appear “normal”. (Ex: the host of a child who lives with an abusive parent could be unaware of the abuse. Otherwise, they might cry or be uncooperative whenever the parent is near, further invoking their wrath. This unawareness allows them to be a “good child”, and stay under the parent’s radar sometimes.) Some systems have more than one host, but that the others have shown up so rarely in this story suggests HR is the only host (for now?).

Savage Raph (SR): Debuting in “Man vs. Sewer”, he’s a survival-oriented alter. HR probably could have defeated the Sando Brothers on his own under normal circumstances, but being in the middle of a breakdown doesn’t do much for your fighting skills. SR got pulled to the front to deal with them instead.

“Red” Raph (RR): “Red” is just a placeholder since we don’t actually know his name yet (or even if he has one, not all alters do), though I’ve also heard folks call him “Angel”. He’s got a “tough love” approach to problem-solving, which was probably a helpful thing in the past. LDM were no doubt rowdy children! We were (officially) introduced to him in “Pizza Puffs”.

Mind Raph (MR): MR could just be a manifestation of HR's thought process via Cartoon Goofery, but that possibility doesn’t give me anything to work with so I’m ignoring it. He’s pretty similar to HR, maybe a tad more upbeat. We (officially) met him in “Raph’s Ride-Along”.

When “Pizza Puffs” first aired, I was like “ah yes, this is the alter who has the cranky edgelord tendencies we’ve seen in previous iterations of Raph. He probably broods on rooftops in the rain when he’s in a bad mood.” Combining that with the whole “Red Angel” thing gives off some Batman vibes. And, of course, SR is similar to the Hulk. Those two heroes are pretty different, but they do have one major thing in common...

A sudden, violent loss. Given how prevalent rushing water is throughout “Man vs. Sewer”, I’m thinking a flood came through and separated Raph from his family. (You could probably argue that turbulent water symbolizes a turbulent subconscious? 🤷) Again, DID stems from long-term trauma, so Raph must have been gone for... a while. A couple of months, maybe more? It’s hard to say exactly; we have a little wiggle room when applying human developmental psychology to a human/turtle mutant. Since Splinter still needed to care for the other three, he wouldn’t have been able to devote much time to searching for Raph, and the New York City sewers go on for miles and miles. The longer Raph was alone, the more convinced he would have been that the others had drowned and he was the only survivor.

How old would he have been? I know the turtles are “different ages”, but they were all mutated at the same time so I’m pretty sure Splinter was just like “the littlest one is the youngest, the biggest one is the oldest, and the medium-sized ones are the middle children.” They’re all probably fourteenish by “Finale”. Back in “MvS”, Leo said, “You know how savage Raph gets when he’s alone”. He didn’t say anything like, “You know how savage Raph gets when he’s alone ever since such-and-such an incident happened”. This suggests that LDM straight-up don’t know something traumatic happened to Raph; they were too little to retain concrete memories of that time. In their minds, Raph has always been like this. Draxum isn’t known for his patience, so even though he wasn’t able to immerse the hatchlings in mutagen for long, they probably mature a bit faster than humans. And since humans usually can’t remember anything from before four years of age, three sounds about right for the turtles, though they would have been stronger and steadier on their feet than any human toddler. I doubt Raph would have survived otherwise.

I think he’s sort of... “stuck” back in that trauma. Catching food, building a fire, making a weapon, and getting camouflage aren’t the behaviors of someone who’s only been gone for a few minutes.

When SR called for help, I don’t think he was expecting anyone to answer.

But Raph did manage to hang onto something as he was swept away! It wasn’t much, but that little ragdoll gave him comfort while he was scared and alone.

(The rabbit design on Bruce’s pajamas is probably a coincidence, but...)

Raph seems the type to have sympathy for odd-looking toys. His knockoff Mrs. Cuddles plushie was the emotional crutch he needed back then.

And then he was separated from that as well. Lowkey associating Mrs. Cuddles with this traumatic event would explain why HR was so scared of her. That he doesn’t remember the trauma means he has no context for this fear, making it seem silly and baseless to him (and to the rest of his family), which is why he denied being scared at all in the first part of the “Mrs. Cuddles” episode. It would also explain why he collects teddy bears instead these days, they are a “safe” toy. (The moral of the story is to not make fun of triggers that seem silly.)

(I wonder what would happen if Mrs. Cuddles encountered Savage Raph? Perhaps he’d be quite sympathetic towards such a lonely little raggedy thing! Timestuck as he is, he probably wouldn’t question why a stuffed animal can talk... and it wouldn't be hard for her to persuade her “new bestest fwiend” to get rid of some “mean ol’ nasty sewew monstews” for her.)

That whole “sewer monsters” thing suggests Raph ran into... something while he was wandering alone. Y’all have heard those rumors about alligators living in the New York City sewers, right? Encountering Leatherhead could trigger a flashback.

It would be pretty easy to introduce Leatherhead into the narrative. One of the episodes the Rise crew had planned was titled “The Island of Dr. Noe”, and alligators have very impressive teeth. The Mirage comics had a story where Leatherhead and several cryptids were brought to an island to be hunted for sport.

Noe seems to have quite a few cronies/friends/rivals he could entertain this way. Since he’s got that obsession with Raph, Noe captures him as well, knocking him out with those darts so he can’t waste his energy trying to escape too soon. (Let’s just assume everyone’s powers are glitchy because they all hit another wave of puberty, meaning they can’t just curbstomp the lower-level villains lol.)

HR wakes up on the island and, of course, starts to panic because he’s lost and alone. While wandering, he runs into Leatherhead, which would trigger a flashback to getting attacked by that alligator all those years ago. But Leatherhead doesn’t want to fight! He’s just as scared and confused as HR is, and could really use a partner to help him survive this island.

HR and SR come into conflict because Leatherhead is/isn’t/is/isn’t/is/isn’t a threat. HR eventually wins out, reasoning that even if Leatherhead is that alligator, it wouldn’t be fair to judge him for what he did back when he was an animal.

But time and dissociation can make memories unclear. That our first look at Leatherhead was in Draxum’s “bluh bluh I’m gonna mutate all the humans” bit in “Bug Busters” means he’s a human-base mutant. He wasn’t the alligator back then, but the hunter tracking it. Leatherhead isn’t one of Noe’s targets, he is one of Noe’s guests! And he wants no one to interfere with his quarry, so he’ll play nice long enough for him and the snapper to take out the rest of the hunters and the freaks. Then the two of them will have the island all to themselves...

Years and years ago, Jack Marlin was a big game hunter prowling the New York City sewers in search of an alligator. He did manage to find and kill one, only to realize it had also been hunting! He had inadvertently saved the strangest little turtle creature.

Marlin had become too skilled at this point, the hunt held no challenge for him. This turtle sounded very young, and he was quite big and strong already. An adult could be tough and intelligent enough to entertain him. Marlin tried to get Raph to lead him back to “the others”. But Raph had been lost for some time, and as far as he knew, his family was dead. Hearing that put Marlin in quite the sour mood. A little mutant snapper is a better catch than none at all, so Marlin tried to haul Raph off. Raph fought back and bit off Marlin’s hand. He escaped, but lost his rabbit in the scuffle. Marlin retreated as well, taking some time to recover, scheme, and hunt other game. (And to pocket that rabbit. The blood loss had made him woozy, and he wanted to have some kind of proof he hadn’t just hallucinated the snapper.) Perhaps he turned that alligator’s hide into a vest, which provided the genetic material for his mutation when he eventually got bit by an oozesquito. Like his Mirage counterpart, Marlin didn’t take losing a limb as a sign he should retire, and instead got a tricked-out prosthetic. Who knows what he could do with it in such a mystic setting as Rise.

Raph eventually reunited with his family, but those distrustful, high-strung survivalist traits he had picked up weren’t helpful anymore. He once again had to be the good and patient big brother who didn’t bite when someone play-tackled him or shook him awake at three in the morning because they’d had a nightmare. Those two states gradually got partitioned off more and more, and now they know little, if anything, about each other.

So Leatherhead and HR are chasing away some mothmen or whatever, and things are going pretty well... until one of them knocks Leatherhead over and a familiar ragdoll rabbit falls out of his pocket. SR realizes that Leatherhead is Marlin and switches in to fight him off again. They’re evenly matched, or perhaps SR is even in danger of losing, when LDM arrive to provide support. Leatherhead is enough of a tactician to know that he should retreat. Donnie and Mikey pursue him while Leo stays behind, placing the rabbit in his stunned brother’s hands. “Remember when Pops made this for you? You were always really gentle with it, ‘cause he wasn’t good at sewing back then...”

(This thing really needs patching up, he’s got sewing stuff for whenever he needs to fix his bears/Blue isn’t a threat on his own/Wasn’t he just back at the lair?/Blue gave back the rabbit/Why does he feel like he got hit by a train?/Blue doesn’t want to fight?/ ...Leo?) And that’s enough for HR to switch back in. He’s probably missing memory from his whole time on the island, so while Leo does his best to tell him what happened, they don’t have enough puzzle pieces between them to truly figure out what's going on.

They defeat the bad guys, release the cryptids, save the day, etc. (Leatherhead managed to lose Donnie and Mikey in the woods. A battle for another day.) Once they return to the lair, HR gets help from Draxum to modify the memory spell from “E-Turtle Sunshine” so he can try to fill in the gaps. Surely he wouldn’t get rejected by his own subconscious... right?

Cue part three in the saga of Raph Punches Himself In The Face. SR isn’t happy that HR is essentially trying to poke at an improperly-healed wound, and attempts to chase him off. HR assumes that SR is just a psychic white blood cell like the Lou Jitsu constructs in Splinter’s mind, and retaliates.

But, of course, fighting is not the answer here. All that accomplishes is giving the body bruises. Eventually HR realizes “stay away” and “back off” are a little different than “get out”, and that SR is just scared. So HR tries another tactic. Over the following days and weeks, he tunes in to calmer memories and just sort of... talks. About what happened yesterday, about his teddy bear collection, about how he finally managed to get a good picture of that pizza pigeon. It takes a while to establish a connection, and even then, it’s spotty at best. Using the spell too much can cause headaches and nightmares. There are days when SR is nearby, and days when he’s not there at all. But he shows up when he can.

And then there’s awkward, stilted conversation and questions neither of them know how to answer and questions neither of them want to answer and more scrapes and bruises and strained silences and apologies, but they finally, finally reach a compromise. SR still doesn’t let HR near those memories, but he tells HR what happened as best he can. (The audience would see those memories, with SR as a voiceover.) Afterwards, HR still visits the mindscape that’s starting to become more solid. They talk some more, they watch light and shadow flow around them, they listen to half-forgotten lullabies on scratchy old cassette tapes. Eventually, HR doesn’t even need to use the memory spell, meditation is enough.

They’ll never get along all the time. But it’s a start.

(SR is going to be so clingy when it finally clicks for him when he finally lets himself believe that his family is alive.)

---

This took eight million years lmao. Parts 2 and 3 will come out eventually, they’ll focus more on MR and RR. Let me know if I need to tag this stuff as anything.

The usual disclaimer applies, I am not a system or a mental health professional so if you’re one or both of those things then feel free to give me some of that good good constructive criticism.

#you called for help... but nobody came.#rottmnt #rottmnt theory #the 'raph is a system' theory #rottmnt raph #savage raph #mrs. cuddles #leatherhead #jack marlin #plot bunnies free to a good home lmao #long post

312 notes · View notes

justsomefluff · 4 years

Note

Hello I was wondering if you could do an ateez reaction to going to a fashion show with their girlfriend 🥺❤

here it is!! sorry it’s so late!! I hope you enjoy! <3

Hongjoong:

Okay so Joong is the type to pretend he doesn’t want to go

But then love every second of it

And after your first one, he’s gonna beg you to go to more shows with him

Like every time a model comes out wearing something new, even if the entire look is hideous, he’s gonna complement something about the look

Because he knows how hard the models and designers work to make all this happen

And if there’s a look he really really loves, he’ll look at you and be like

Im gonna buy that for you

Suddenly showering you in complements

“Babe, you’d look so beautiful in that”

“Babe, you’re the most stunning person in here”

NO FAX, JUST PRINTER

And at the end of the night, you’ve both compiled a list of colors and styles you would like to see on each other

So you decide to make each other outfits for the next date you go on

And its just so cute bc Joongie really does draw inspiration from everything he sees

So he totally writes a song about this experience with you

Seonghwa:

Seonghwa is not shy about his love for fashion

Like he has his own sense of style, and he loves choosing things that he feels will express his personality

So when you guys get the chance to go to a fashion show together

OH BOY GET READY

He’s gonna grade every look under his breath on a scale from 1-10

And then he’ll tell you what he likes most about each style that is presented

He tries not to be too critical though bc he knows that everyone’s tastes are different

Will also ask your opinion on the outfits

Like “ooh what do you think of that one? I really like the textures on it!”

You will both choose your top two outfits

like you choose them so that you have one you want just for yourself and one that you want for him

And then he does the same

You typically choose similar looks because you know each other’s style super well

And Hwa is totally the type to surprise you by buying you one of the pieces he had seen you eyeing more than the others

“Just as a thank you for coming with me :)”

Yunho:

His crackhead comes out in full force at fashion shows, believe me

I mean seriously

Every time something comes out that he doesn’t like he insults it in a really funny way

And you’re sitting in the front row so your literally biting your lip so hard to not laugh in front of all these cameras

Like a model comes out with a bunch of feathers on her outfit and Yunho’s just like

“Heads up, everybody, Chicken Little has just hit the stage!”

Or if he sees something particularly revealing he’s like

“Wouldn’t you love to see me in that, baby”

Like would you just hush already lmao

He takes a picture of every single look that he finds funny, just so he can send them to you later with a funny caption

But he also sees one he really loves

Will take a picture of your side profile when you aren’t looking

And the model is coming down the runway in the background

He will save that picture as his background as a reminder that he is going to get you that outfit someday

But he will try not to let you find out that he was so soft about it lmao

So he tries to keep you from seeing his wallpaper

He really wants it to be a surprise, but he also cant stop looking at the picture and imagining the moment you are finally able to put the outfit on

Yeosang:

(he’s so cute I cant breatheeee)

Yeosang will sit pretty silently through most of it

But do not be fooled

NO MODEL IS SAFE

He is judging and critiquing every single look like it is his JOB

The most stone cold poker face you will ever see

Will only crack a smile if you whisper “you’d look so good in that, Sangie”

But when you finally leave he will show you any of the pictures he had taken and start a legitimate conversation about how you liked or disliked each look

Has a grading system lmao

Like you have A-F grading scale, but also categories that each look has to fulfill

Color, texture, fit, overall flow of the patterns and clothing items, etc.

And you can play along for a while before you’re finally like

“YEOSANG, WE ARENT JUDGES ON NEXT TOP MODEL”

“We could be”

Like boy if you don’t-

But then he gives in and he’s like “just tell me which one you loved the most and I’ll tell you if it was good or not”

So you do and he’s like “THAT WAS THE WORST LOOK OF THE ENTIRE NIGHT WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT”

And then that launches a playful debate about who has better fashion sense

But overall you both had a really good time and plan on making this an annual tradition

San:

(he’s so breathtaking here im sorry I mean cmon his hair matches his sweatshirt)

This fashionista here

Sees the artistry in every look and compliments literally everything

Very genuine in his appreciation for the work that has been done

Spewing compliments the entire time

“Omg look how intricate all the stitching is.”

“That fascinator is so stunning, look at all the colors wow”

And it’s so cute to just watch him

Like he’s assessing all the models with the biggest doe eyes

He really is like a little kid at Disneyland for the first time

Just so excited and appreciative of every little thing

“I wish our next comeback could be so beautiful like this!”

“Sannie, your comebacks are always beautiful”

“BUT LOOK AT ALL THIS ELEGANCE!!”

It’s just so adorable

And when the designer comes out at the end of each parade of models, you can bet San is cheering the loudest

And he’ll be so inspired and as his makeup noonas to try and replicate some of the looks he had seen

Gets hella motivated and literally starts drawing up ideas that he has for costumes and things

He’s just a sweet baby who sees the beauty in everything and wants to make beautiful things too

And he will always ask your opinion on his drawings

“Do you like this one? Do you think it could work?”

And of course you tell him all of them are fantastic bc they are

And you guys work together to make some of his outfit dreams come true

Mingi:

At fashion shows, Mingi thrives bc models tend to be really tall for some reason

As a short person, I am offended by tall people’s clothes

ANYWAY

Mingi is just looking at the pants like “I bet those would actually fit me on the first try”

And then he’s like “baby, I could be a model”

And you’re like “I already knew that, you’ve always been pretty”

He gets blushy aww

“I’m pretty” UWUUUUUU

And now that you’ve got him going you cant just let that blush fade away I mean its too cute

Don’t squander this opportunity to make our baby blush even harder

So literally every other model your whispering “you’d look better in that”

“You’d be the best model here, Minnie”

And eventually he’s smiling so big and blushing so hard that he’s like “stoop my cheeks hurt”

So you settle for giving him a lil smoochie on his cheek

But then he shall take his revenge

Starts complementing you even more than you had complemented him

Thus begins a complement war

By the end, both of you realize that you’ve ignored the last two sets of models and had just been telling each other how much you love each other over and over

Get a room you guys I mean really

Wooyoung:

Wooyoung is a giggly mess

The entire time

Because he thinks every little thing is funny

A model’s makeup is too extreme? He’s laughing

Someone’s hair is too wild? He’s laughing

Someone looks like they rolled straight out of a dumpster? he’s laughing and saying “thats you”

Like SHUT UP lmaoooo

He’s also laughing bc he’s imagining the members in all of the ugly outfits

Like “lmao imagine Hongjoong wearing that big ole hat”

“Imagine Seonghwa wearing those balloon shorts”

Like he’s so annoying lmao

But it does have you both laughing hard enough to get dirty looks from other spectators

Once he eventually calms down and hushes himself, he actually starts getting into it and thoroughly enjoys watching the way the clothes flow when the models walk and stuff

He finds it genuinely interesting to see how each artist has fit the clothes to each specific model’s body type

But he will still fit in some snide comments here and there to make sure you’re fully entertained

Bc if he’s not laughing… is it really Wooyoung

Jongho:

Okay Jongho is definitely into fashion

Whether he is obvious about his affinity for cool clothes or not, he’s into it okay

And he evaluates every look in terms of “would I look good in that? Would bae look good in that? Would any of the hyungs look good in that?”

Very thoughtful baby

Will take pictures to send to people and be like “this reminds me of you”

Will say it directly to you too

He is also kinda cheesy and poetic about it

“The bright pink reminds me of how happy you make me”

“That blue is like the sky when you’re around: cloudless”

Eventually you’re like “oh shut up ya freak” lmao

And then he’s laughing bc he’s embarrassed that he said all that

He’s like “why am I so cheesy”

And you low-key love it so you just smile at him

But then he keeps taking pictures of the models and eventually starts taking pictures of you bc he just loves you and finds you so breathtaking awww

At the end of the night he’s so sweet to you and thanks you for coming with him and hopes you had a good time and-

You just kiss him and tell him you had a lot of fun and you should definitely do it again next time there’s a show in town

He definitely agrees bc he really just loved sharing that experience with you

82 notes · View notes

pipsqueakparker · 4 years

Text

pipsqueakparker’s fic masterlist

decided that this might be a fun thing to do and keep my focus for a while, so i’m finally compiling all of my AO3 fics and tumblr drabbles together here! separated by series & rating, hopefully i’ll keep this updated, please enjoy and pardon that i don’t use proper summaries just the ‘AKA’ titles that i always give my fics.

SERIES

dirty little secrets;

tags: first kiss, secret relationship, watford eighth year AU

1. kiss me, AKA The One Where Simon Snow Actually Figured It Out (T) 2. don’t tell anyone, AKA The Accidental Sequel To That One Ficlet (T) 3. who has to know, AKA The One Where The Boys Really Test Their Abilities To Keep Secrets (G)

gamer-guru playlist;

tags: youtuber AU, non-magical, gamer simon/beautuber baz, pining, (eventual first kisses and the like)

1. Like & Subscribe, AKA The One Where Simon & Baz Are YouTubers & Secretly In Love (G)

a five-years-later au;

tags: christmas fic, proposal fic, and just lots of dirty, dirty deeds, honeymoon, turning

1. you’re a fit one, mr. grinch, AKA The One Where It’s Their Fifth Anniversary And Simon Has Some Questionable Kinks (E) 2. new memories, AKA Another One Where Baz Proposes (E) 3. for-fucking-ever, AKA The One With The Honeymoon (E)

MULTI-CHAPTER

simon snow’s guide to the perfect pride, AKA Simon & Baz Attend Their First Pride (Complete, 3/3)

tags: post-carry on AU, pride fic, vacation fic

RATING: GENERAL

the one with baz’s ridiculous beauty routines, AKA does what it says on the tin (words: 1335)

tags: post-canon, drabble

read to me, AKA The One Where We All Indulge In The Idea Of Baz Reading To Simon Cause It’s Cute Okay? (words: 1316)

tags: drabble, fluff

new year’s eve, AKA The One With The Semi-Cliche NYE Kiss (words: 1565)

tags: drabble, first kiss

tell me you need me, AKA The One Where Simon Wants To Be Wanted (words: 1407)

tags: drabble, fluff

that tickles, AKA The One Where Simon Finds Out Something New (words: 803)

tags: drabble, tickling, morning fluff

i missed you, AKA The One Where Baz Is A Big Ol’ Softie (words: 440)

tags: drabble, fluff

1:24 AM, AKA The One Where Baz & Simon & Their Cat Cuddle (words: 900)

tags: drabble, sleepy cuddles

swing, AKA The One Where Simon & Baz Make Out In A Park (words: 762)

tags: drabble, post-CO, pre-WS, fluff & snogging

baz’s first halloween, AKA The One Where Simon & Baz Take Mordelia Trick or Treating (words: 2312)

tags: domestic fluff, halloween fic

Eclipsed, AKA The Sad One Post Break-Up (words: 971)

tags: post-WS, angst

the one where they’re lesbians, AKA The One Where They’re Lesbians (words: 1217)

tags: genderswap, fluff

the taste of my love, AKA The One With Their First Valentine’s Day (words: 3568)

tags: valentine’s fic, firsts, fluff

five more minutes, AKA The One With Soft, Sleepy Kisses And Cuddles (words: 456)

tags: drabble, fluff

night terrors, AKA The One Where Baz Sleeps In Simon’s Arms, Peacefully (words: 1065)

tags: drabble, watford AU

overgrown, AKA The One With Sleepy Sofa Snuggles (words: 390)

tags: drabble

RATING: TEEN & UP

confetti & communication, AKA The One Where Baz Is On A Curious Search (words: 1035)

tags: mention of sex toys, early relationship

getting better, AKA The One Where Simon Just Wants to Be A Fool in Love (words: 3060)

tags: fluff & light angst, confessions of love, early relationship, post-canon

a selfish request, AKA The One Where Baz Should Be Doing Anything Else (words: 349)

tags: drabble

heavy sleeper, AKA The One Where Simon Has to Wake Baz, Creatively (words: 929)

tags: drabble, fluff

hold me, AKA The One Where Baz Is Low-Key Affection-Starved And Asks For It (words: 536)

tags: drabble, touch-starved, baz being horny for general affection

three years, AKA The One Where Baz... (words: 1873)

tags: drabble, idiots in love, proposal fic

Homemade, AKA The One For Baz’s Birthday (words: 3006)

tags: birthday fic, fluff

frail, AKA The One Where Simon Isn’t Fragile (words: 1369)

tags: drabble, love confession

seven minutes, AKA The One With The Dumb Party Game (words: 1269)

tags: drabble, first kiss

solid-c’s, AKA The One Where Baz Distracts Simon This Time (words: 908)

tags: drabble, fluff

better than fighting, AKA The One That’s Just Gratuitously Making Out (words: 485)

tags: drabble, they’re just making out folks

the snack that smiles back, AKA, The One Where Simon Is The Greatest Boyfriend Ever (words: 2150)

tags: future fic, domestic bliss, blood drinking

it’s all about intentions, AKA Simon’s Birthday Fic 2020 (words: 3485)

tags: birthday fluff, happy birthday simon snow

RATING: MATURE

f.y.e, AKA The One Where Simon Really Is Trying To Be The Downfall of Baz’s Education (words: 563)

tags: drabble, simon distracting baz

3 times baz didn't mean to use his thrall + 1 time he did (a butter & jam remix), AKA The One Where Baz’s Thrall Is The Only Plot Point (words: 3232)

tags: thrall, remixed fic, mild sexual content, implied thrall fornicating

RATING: EXCPLICIT

Brought to Heel, AKA The One Where Baz Wears Heels And... More (Then Less) (words: 7982)

tags: porn without plot, porn with feelings

pleasin’ season, AKA The One Where They Get Off In The Kitchen This Time (words: 1452)

tags: thirsty boys, hand jobs

adequate, AKA The One Where They Make A Mess (words: 1332)

tags: first time, blow jobs

reflection, AKA The One Where They Finally Get Off (words: 3058)

tags: mutual masturbation, post-WS, porn with feelings

double vision, AKA The One Where There Are Two Bazes (words: 5502)

tags: clone/doppleganger sex, gratuitous oral sex

#my fic #simon snow #carry on fic #carry on #baz pitch #snowbaz #snowbaz fic #fic masterlist #masterlist

106 notes · View notes

bergarachan · 5 years

Note

shane kissing the back of ryans hand....,., kissing each knuckles softly..,..,.,,.,.,

i think my brain has stopped functioning. annabelle.exe has stopped working. oops! our servers are down. we’re currently working on it.

here’s a hurt-comfort fic bc its my blog and i do what i want

Ryan showed up on Shane’s doorstep one rainy evening, and Shane immediately noticed something was up.

Shane opened the door, and was immediately meant with sad Ryan. Shane could tell when Ryan was sad. Like, not “being sad for a bit” sad, but genuinely sad. His big, brown puppy eyes were sad and teary. His lips were in a pout and his arms were crossed. He was slouching; looking up at Shane with doe eyes. “Hey, Shane.” He said, and wow, he really sounded sad.

Shane frowned at his best friend’s tone. “Hey, Ryan,” He said softly. “Come on in.” He stepped aside to let Ryan in.

“Wanna watch a movie?” Ryan asked, quite timidly. Ryan wasn’t himself, Shane noticed.

Shane nodded. “Yeah, man. Of course. Is something wrong? Are you okay?” He asked, voice lilted in concern. Ryan just shrugged, moping over to the couch and sitting down. Shane assumed he’d tell Shane if or when he was ready. “Beer and popcorn?” Shane asked.

Ryan nodded. “Yeah, big guy.” Shane smiled at the nickname. His heart always warmed whenever Ryan called him that.

Shane popped a big ol’ bag of corn and brought out a couple beers and placed the bowl and bottles on the coffee table in front of the couch, and sat down next to Ryan. He didn’t miss how Ryan scooched closer to him. Shane, ever the smooth flirter, moved an arm around the back of the couch around Ryan.

He picked up the remote and turned on Netflix. “Anything you wanna watch?” Shane asked.

Again, Ryan shrugged. “Whatever you wanna watch.” Shane nodded, putting on some comedy from the early 2000s and Ryan scooched ever so closer.

The two was enjoying the movie, enjoying their time together at ass o’clock on a rainy night. Shane laughed at a bunch of the funny moments in the movie, and he noticed Ryan smiling a little bit, too. Shane hoped Ryan was feeling at least a little bit better. The two were enjoying each others’ presences, enjoying the almost-touching, almost-cuddling that was going on.

Shane wanted to give Ryan his own time to tell Shane what was going on, but as time went on, Shane grew curious. “Wanna tell me what’s goin’ on, little guy?” He asked.

Ryan looked down at his own lap. “Uh... I’ve just been... thinking about my work. And stuff.”

“Work and stuff?” Shane asked, and gathered the courage to put his arm around Ryan’s shoulder. Ryan scooched closer to Shane so that their sides were pressed together, and Shane’s heart sang.

Ryan shrugged. “I dunno... I just. I feel like it’s not as good. As, you know, weird wonderful, and... homemade and grocery run. My shows are boring, and I just-”

“Hey, hey, no,” Shane cut him off immediately. Who the fuck told Ryan his shows weren’t as good? Shane made a mental note to sucker punch them in the face at a later time. “Your shows are amazing. I love watching them. Spooky small talk? That show is so fuckin’ cute, man.” Cute was not the word Shane meant to say, however he supposed it wasn’t quite a lie.

Ryan made a face. “Cute?”

“Well, I mean, I like seeing your guests go through the maze, and the segments are funny, and the comments you and the guest make when scared is the funniest damn part of that show.”

“You’re just saying that because you’re my friend.” Ryan scoffed. “It really isn’t that good. I should have done something else, or maybe just left Watcher up to you and Steven-”

Oh, fuck no. This would not stand. Shane, in a moment of bravery, cupped Ryan’s face with both of his hands. He noticed Ryan’s puppy eyes were starting to tear up, and his heart broke. “Ryan, no.” He said firmly. “Never say anything about the company like that. Watcher wouldn’t ever be what it is without you. Your bright soul, your... your passion for creating is the glue that brings this company together. Your drive and your happiness that you get simply from creating things and doing the things that you love, it, it makes me so happy to see. Spooky small talk is amazing, don’t say anything different, and if you aren’t happy with it then, fuck it, it’s our company. Let’s make another fucking season.” Ryan started to cry, tears running down his cheeks, and Shane immediately wiped them away with his thumbs. “You could.. you could make a series of just a compilation of you breathing heavily and I would have watched it.” Ryan let out a wet laugh.

“Shut up, Shane,” He sniffled, a (beautiful, in Shane’s opinion) smile starting to form on his face.

“Shhh,” Shane softly shushed him, letting go of his face and pulling him into a hug. “Your content is beautiful. You belong in Watcher. You were born to make content. I hate that you see your amazing self as anything different.” Shane continued to shush him as Ryan continued to cry in his arms.

After a long time, Shane and Ryan pulled away from the hug, and Ryan sniffled again. “Where did you come from, Shane?” Ryan laughed wetly. “Why were you so... sure about it? That I belong?”

Shane smiled at Ryan, not caring that his heart eyes were on clear display. Fuck it.

He lifted Ryan’s hand, and, while maintaining eye contact with Ryan, softly kissed the back of his palm, true gentleman-style. “Shane,” Ryan whispered, like the sound was forced out of him. Shane’s friend was turning bright red.

Teasingly, he tenderly kissed each of Ryan’s knuckles, Ryan turning redder with each heartfelt kiss.

When he was done, he lowered Ryan’s hand and gave Ryan a happy grin that he couldn’t hide even if he tried.

Ryan sniffed once again, tearing up. He was going to cry again. “Shane Madej,” He giggled wetly, and Shane could not bear not being closer to Ryan any longer. Within moments, Ryan was in Shane’s lap, half-laughing half-crying. Shane cupped Ryan’s face with his hands once again, and this time, gave a kiss to Ryan’s lips, and thank god Ryan kissed back. The kiss was full of love, full of all the feelings Shane had been hiding for the past four years, hiding since the day Ryan smiled at him and he realized that Ryan was the most beautiful and important person in Shane’s entire world.

The kiss broke when they absolutely needed air, and Shane wouldn’t stop chasing Ryan’s lips as the latter giggled, kissing his cheeks, the sides of his mouth, his nose, right above his eyelids. He couldn’t help himself. Ryan’s face was red and warm, and eventually he buried his face into Shane’s shoulder. Shane rested his chin on top of Ryan’s head. The two were intertwined, and Shane wouldn’t have it any other way.

“I love you, Shane. Thank you,” Ryan whispered.

Shane kissed the top of his head, smiling wider than he had in weeks. “Anytime, little guy. I love you, too.”

___

okay so maybe i got carried away..................... i hope yall liked that it took me an hour yeehaw

#shyan #shyan drabbles #belle chats #belle writes #ask #answered #anonymous #pls

53 notes · View notes

freshiegayboi · 4 years

Text

Asking the Right Questions chap. 1

an older MCU fic of mine, but clearly one of the most popular fics I’ve ever written lol if you’re new and go snooping in my other content, don’t say you didn’t see the warnings

Tags: hurt Tony Stark, eventual Polyvengers, BAMF Jarvis, protective everyone, therapy positive, ABO universe (no lemons!), angst, hurt/comfort, Canon Divergence

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18842203/chapters/44717005

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was cold in the shop, colder than the cave, colder than space even though just the thought of that seemed impossible. Space had been an empty void of nothing, absolutely nothing but ice and fear and the awful feeling of being so utterly alone. He’d been so afraid, when he’d gone through that wormhole and been suddenly surrounded by so much nothing. And he was afraid now, but for an entirely different reason.

His eyes flitted over the monitors, watching as Clint and Natasha laughed, Sam telling some story with his arms in the air, the three of them sharing quite a large meal of what looked like fried chicken tenders and biscuits, thick mac and cheese and an unhealthy amount of mashed potatoes. The very sight of it made his mouth water, tongue coming out to wet his lips as he wondered if there’d be any left for him to steal, after the others had gone to bed.

He felt the same old worry enter his thoughts; that he was letting them down by not interacting, by staying locked up down here all day and night and only coming out after they’d all were long asleep, disappearing before they came back out in the morning. Sure he was available when duty called, already suited up and out to wherever they’d been called to serve up some good ole UN style justice.

Still, some part of him was relieved to not see Steve or their newest charge anywhere in frame. He’d seen them in the kitchen and had quickly switched feed, unwilling to let his thoughts drift that harshly. Not that he had much control over them in the first place, but it was his last ditch effort in staving off that panic attack he’d been fighting off since Steve had come and told him the news.

New York seemed so long ago, and he and the rest of the team had certainly come a long way, eventually moving from the easily blown up Tower to the Compound that was a bit easier to protect. On the surface, it had concrete shelters for the occasional tornado, safe rooms for anyone that might need protecting, and an excellent system of rooms for various purposes. It also had enough space to hide away the population of at least two large cities in the catacombs underneath, not that Tony planned on advertising that unless absolutely necessary.

But New York was far away, the Chitauri and Loki so very far away, but then all the shit with Killian and Extremis had happened, and hadn’t that left its own scars on his psyche. Then finding all the Hydra outposts after Steve and Natasha had outed the tentacle ridden hide of Shield to the world, saving all the outed agents that needed saving, sending condolences to the families of the ones they couldn’t save. Tony had been… well, more than a bit pissed about the lack of foresight on that, but it wasn’t as if the two of them had very much time to consult him about it. (Sometimes he wondered who they could have saved if he’d been told, even a day or two before.)

And of course Steve’s old war buddy (that Tony was at least 89% positive had been more than a “buddy”) turned out to be a Hydra ghost that had a hand in at least 30 assassinations in the past 50 or so years. Steve wanted to go after him, find him, help him. Tony wanted to leave the damn guy alone, since it was obvious what he wanted was little more than the ones who’d tortured him for 70+ years to mysteriously end up with a bullet between their eyebrows, but Steve was Steve. He was a friend, more than a friend sometimes; he was the one Tony went to when he had his breakdowns and panic attacks and Rhodey wasn’t there to help and he just… couldn’t stomach being alone. Even when Steve did stupid crazy shit and Tony was left to pick up the pieces, Steve always, in the end, came to help him.

The main issue, the whole reason Tony had been hiding out in the first place, was that Steve had taken him aside, sometime after the first mission to go stake out an old Hydra base, and had informed him that he needed to tell him something. Something important, something that would probably change things.

Tony hated change, had hated it every time something big happened and everything changed, but this was Steve, and if he said it was important, then it was important.

Finding out that the old War Buddy, Buck Barnes, best friend of Captain America and lover boy of the Howling Commandos, the guy that his father would mourn with the others, the man they had just recently found out was still alive... he was the one that'd done old Howard in. Had killed his mother . And yeah, that changed things, it really did, but...

But then Sokovia had happened, Ultron had happened, and things got a bit patchy. Tony had new things to have nightmares about, Steve was in his room a little more often than usual, and even when Tony explained that he and Bruce hadn’t actually made Ultron, the team felt a little more distant than he remembered them being. He didn't have time to think about Bucky or what he'd done, who he'd killed , not on top of everything else that was running through his already crowded head.

And the Accords, hadn’t that been a shitshow. Steve had been against them, of course, worrying that the government just wanted more control over everything they did. Tony knew that they needed structure, needed rules, or Sokovia would happen over and over again. New York would happen again. Eventually Steve had come around to the idea, and when the bomb went off and killed the Wakandan king and they learned it was Bucky, well, Steve had backup when he went to go get him. (And even if the thought of seeing him made Tony feel physically ill, he went because Steve asked him to, had practically begged. Tony couldn't say no to that.)

Now Bucky was with them, safe and under protection by the UN as a POW that had been brainwashed into doing all the horrible shit he’d done over the last 50 years, on the condition that they'd get his head fixed. The Accords were in effect, Zemo’s plan had pretty much no effect at all, and the team was stronger than it’d been before.

And then… and then Tony had gotten the file on the Winter Soldier, compiled by FRIDAY, and had found that Steve had been telling the truth, that… that he’d finally found his parents’ killer. His mother’s murderer. He’d finally found out why they crashed that night, why they’d been found strangled when they should have survived the crash.

And he hadn’t talked to Steve since. He couldn't, couldn't look at him when he was so busy helping Bucky back on his feet, not when he felt his windpipe slowly crushing in and his chest filling with molten lead any time he was even in the same room. Hell, the same fucking building. He could smell the scent of the broken alpha when he went into different rooms, his own instincts battling with his absolute terror.

The smell of an approaching alpha made his hackles raise as he turned away from the monitors, his own synthetic pheromones leaking out into the room to let whoever it was know that he was on the edge, and not to be messed with. He watched the door to the elevator, waiting for tense seconds until it opened and Natasha walked through, a plate of steaming food in her hands.

She walked up a respectful distance, then raised a brow, the look perfected like only an alpha could do. Tony refused to turn throat, raising his own brown in question.

“Figured even our resident genius needed food. It’s damn good.” She lifted the plate in question, waiting for his permission to come closer and give it to him.

There was no question who the superior in this room was though, especially given extenuating circumstances. Tony finally glanced down, allowing her to finish her walk over to his desk, placing the plate heaping with chicken and biscuits on top of a mountain of mashed potatoes, white gravy covering it all on the desktop beside him. Then she took a respectful step back and he felt himself relax a little, even as his instincts begged her to come closer.

Something must have slipped through his mask of indifference, Natasha glancing at the camera feed before speaking again. “You know you’ll have to come out of hiding some time, medvezhonok. All of us do.” And with that she turned foot, face as placid as when she’d come in, and headed back to the elevator, leaving him to his steaming plate of goodness that was, unsurprisingly, the best fried chicken and biscuits he’d ever had. If he wasn’t currently avoiding the both of them, he’d have begged them to teach him how to make more traditional southern food. They seemed to have some kind of innate talent for it, despite being Brooklyn boys through and through.

Busying himself with blueprints for the next Starkpad and all the new projects that needed to be approved from R&D, he worked through until 3 in the morning, after which the stains of gravy and hardened scrapes of mashed potato had left a caked substance on the plate. Checking the camera feed he found no one about, no one lurking or otherwise awake. Which, it was 3 in the morning, it’d be strange if they were.

Sneaking upstairs, he put his plate in the dishwasher, grabbed the box of leftover chicken tenders, glanced back toward the guest rooms. Then headed back down to the shop.

#kas writes #marvel #polyvengers #tony stark #steve rogers #natasha romonova #bucky barnes #sam wilson #peter parker #angst #hurt/comfort #hurt tony stark #bamf tony stark #eventual polyvengers #no steve hate #canon divergent

15 notes · View notes

aleximedicusa · 4 years

Text

𝟷𝟾𝟸𝙾𝚜 𝙲𝙷𝙴𝙰𝚃 𝚂𝙷𝙴𝙴𝚃. i figured it might actually help people to have a simple cheat sheet guide to vague 1820s daily life, so they don’t have to go searching themselves to make an au if they want to! this is info compiled by both viktor and myself for the purpose of our 1820s server. under the cut bc this shit is long.

SO WHAT IS GENERAL LIFE LIKE ( as explained by mr. viktor b. [redacted] ) - We are early in industrialisation. Coal is primarily a source of heat, not power yet but it's Comin'. First steam locomotives have been made, and the first railway for public passengers just opened in '25, transporting people a short stretch in Durham (but who lives in Durham anyway). The main use of these engines is in mining. - The other industries that have been mechanised are done from wind and water mills. Most notably does textile production utilize water power. This will all eventually also switch to steam, we are in a real changeover period right now, just on the cusp of industrialisation - Gas lamps are widespread and in use in more fancy homes and public places! Otherwise, one must rely on petroleum or good ol candles, this makes us all very dependent on the phases of the moon for nighttime endeavours, as these lights are not particularly effective - Transportation is by Horse or Boat. Boat is faster, and as result, most industry and "larger" urban centres all congregate around rivers. - Society is generally quite fragmented, with the majority of populations living in the countryside with doings related to farmland and so on. The pricklings of industrialisation will drive more people towards the cities, as they build bigger receptacles for jobs and the countryside is mechanised. But not entirely yet. - We have just (well since 1815) exited the Napoleonic wars, a long and gruelling affair that has left Britain in a bit of an economic depression. There is general class unrest and intensified punishment for crime, which is on the rise. - it is an incredibly hierarchal society with very few avenues of social mobility, though with increasing industrialisation and better access to universities, the bourgeois class is rising and the economic elite are no longer all related by blood. What horror! - That is not to say that nobility have no power. Aside from the French, who are currently in a mess coming out of the First Empire (press F to pay respects), the noble class still controls the vast majority of funds and property, with most common people working underneath such a family in some regard. - disease is rife and often comes from lack of nutrients, but we don't know how those work so like, die I guess. As a result, malformations is far more common than today, especially in the underclass - Everyone Drinks Alcohol All The Time Water Is Not Safe - Empires are a thing! Imperialism is well on its way to do more acts of terror and horror upon the world, but it's also making the colonisers well rich so it's fine innit (it's not) - Fashions are back to being a bit more cinched in than they were in the earlier regency (get it because we're all wearing corsets with a tight waist focus im very smart) and is generally restrictive both for men and women in the upper class. The lower classes can't afford big changes in clothes, but at least they are all wearing long trousers now and not breeches. - Breeches are still valid for evening wear, show off those calves boyes - oh cholera is happening lol - clothes generally have far more layers and are heavier than what we see today. They wear for far longer for this reason, but this is also because warming up a house is bloody well impossible, if you've ever been in a student housing unit you know what I mean when I say poor insulation. You needed those layers pretty much year round.

SO WHAT’S THE DEAL WITH MEDICAL STUFF ( as explained by ms. iris n. [redacted] )

— Academic study of anatomy is rapidly on the rise. We've shot up from around 300 students of anatomy in London in 1798 to nearly 1,000 in London in 1823. Approach to teaching anatomy is also changing, with a heavier emphasis on the necessity of students dissecting bodies themselves instead of merely observing dissection. — In 1788, we have the first recorded trial for disinterment of a corpse. In Rex v. Lynn, the judge ruled it to be a misdemeanour to disinter a body for dissection. However, this law really wasn't that strongly enforced when it first came into play, since, at that time, there were few enough exhumators / resurrectionists that the public really didn't notice the offence. As demand increased, however, the public became more aware of the crime, and the authorities started to crack down more on the guilty parties. There are also cases that have set up the precedence that even preventing a body from initial interment is a punishable offence, as some men have been charged with crimes like conspiring to prevent burial. Surgeons and anatomists can be indicted, too, not just the resurrectionists. — As both demand and risk increase, the resurrectionists become more and more degraded and desperate individuals. There's an enormous amount of competition between them, with criminals competing to muscle others out of their territories. — The price for a body is generally between £7 and £10, at this time. Burke and Hare sold their first body in 1827 for £7.10. This is an enormous price in the 1820s. — Students are starting to leave England in pursuit of better anatomy teaching, generally choosing France for its comparatively more lax laws regarding dissection. Professors, students, and doctors are starting to really put pressure on the government to reform the system. — The only bodies you can legally dissect at this point are the bodies of hanged murderers. A debate was introduced in parliament to suggest widening the scope of the law to permit dissecting the bodies of those hanged for burglary and robbery, but this was never put into law. — Most anatomists did not know (or at least claimed not to know) that it was illegal to have a body in their possession that did not belong to a hanged murderer. As such, many were not very careful about hiding the fact that they were purchasing disinterred bodies. — The decision of what to do to reform the system is heavily debated. Some doctors favour the French system, wherein any unclaimed body is permitted to be used for dissection; some more radical doctors, like the anonymous doctor who published a pamphlet under the pseudonym of Alexipharmacus in 1829, favour a system wherein the only bodies dissected are the bodies of those who have given express consent for their corpses to be anatomised after death. Guy was ahead of his time, really. — Although the Burke and Hare case doesn't break until November of 1828, people were already beginning to discuss the worrying possibility that this current system was going to end up producing murderers. — Public sentiment towards anatomists and surgeons wasn't... great, at this period, for obvious reasons.

#( * reference. )#( * history. )#hopefully this gives some sense of what's going on enough for aus!

8 notes · View notes

howtohero · 4 years

Text

#288 The Center of the Earth

It’s the summer, and so you’re probably feeling about as hot as a lava monster right about now. But you should know that you’ve actually got it pretty good, relatively speaking. At least you’ve got the occasional breeze. At least sometimes it rains. At least sometimes an ice villain shows up and tries to form a glacier in the center of town. (For some reason they only show up to do this in the summer, when it is, statistically speaking, the most difficult time of the year to try to form a glacier.) There are people and creatures and entire civilizations that don’t have that luxury. They live beneath the Earth’s surface, deep within the mantle and the crust and all the good stuff. They live in the Center of the Earth, and let me tell you, things are weird down there.

The Center of the Earth is one of those strange and mystical realms that’s really a lot bigger than it has any reasonable right to be. I mean we know how big the Earth is (it’s got a diameter of 7,917.5 miles). We know how big the Earth’s core is (it’s got a diameter of 1,520 miles). And yet, somehow, the Center of the Earth contains way too much to be able to fit into that small an area. I’m pretty sure there’s more going on in the Earth’s core than there even is on the surface. But that’s magical locales for you. They don’t play by your rules. Since it’s such a weird place, and since you’re a superhero, you’re probably going to find yourself having to journey to the Center of the Earth a good many times. Don’t be surprised if it looks completely different every time you’re down there. They remodel a lot. And there’s like 20-30 different realities fighting for supremacy and existence down there at any given time.

For starters, let’s talk about how you would even get to the Center of the Earth. Naturally, there are the obvious routes: teleporters, wishes on shooting stars, wrestling control of the Ferry to Heck away from Charon the ferryman and taking a left at the fork in the River Styx. But let’s imagine for a minute that you aren’t buff enough to take on the steward of the dead and don’t have enough small change to pay for even the skeeviest of public teleportation chambers. Let’s say all you’ve got to rely on are your own wits and muscles (and this muscular and witty guide). As most physics students would tell you, if a tunnel was drilled all the way through the Earth a combination of factors (gravity, wind resistance, thinking light thoughts) will allow you to fall all the way to the other side of the planet in only 42 minutes and 12 seconds. So, it stands to reason that if such a tunnel existed, it would take only 21 minutes and 6 seconds to get to the Center of the Earth. That’s not too bad. It takes me longer than that to get out of bed in the morning. Lucky for you, there are actually several tunnels through the Earth. Who knew? Well, we did, and now we impart this secret knowledge on to you dear reader(s?).

You see, since the dawn of time brave explorers have attempted to reach the Center of the Earth under the assumption that it holds great treasures and wonders (and they were right, at least on most Tuesdays and every fourth Thursday). Some of those explorers were even successful, and they left a trail of maps and clues to aid others on their quest to find the mystical realm (well, finding it isn’t actually all that hard, we know exactly where it is... It’s in the Center of the Earth). And then dozens of other explorers took the time to assemble all those disparate clues and map fragments. So now it’s really very easy to find your way there. Sure, your quest will be a lot less epic than those of explorers and adventurers past. You won’t have to dig for decades or suffer betrayal at the hands of your estranged uncle who you thought was dead but has now returned to conquer the mole-monkeys of the Center of the Earth, but it will be quicker, and honestly, I feel like that’s better. As of this writing there have been reports of tunnels to the Center of the Earth in the Bermuda Triangle, the Himalayas, the Dead Sea, Los Angeles, the moon somehow, Antarctica and approximately one fourth of the apartments in the Manhattan neighborhood of Washington Heights.

What you’re going to find when you reach the Center of the Earth varies from day to day and minute to minute. Quite frankly it would be virtually impossible for us to properly prepare you for what you’re going to see down there. So it’s best to be prepared for literally anything. As a professional courtesy to you we’ve compiled a list of things that we’ve seen:

Dinosaurs: If you get down there and it’s just a bunch of dinosaurs I honestly recommend just leaving. They’re not gonna want to hang out with you. For the most part, dinosaurs aren’t interested in whatever superheroic quest you’re on. (Unless you run into Inspector Ankylosaurus, he’s always down for a classic superhero mess around.)

Tarkavia: As we’ve explained in our post on snow missions, Tarkavia is a magical realm that sometimes exists in the Earth’s core. There they love two things, war and cheese. If you wind up there, please pitch them our innovative combination of the two concepts “Cheese War” which is a war fought with, over, and by, cheese. We have a feeling they’re gonna love that idea so much that they make whomever suggested it their king. (We’re gracious enough to give this kingmaking idea to you because we are banned from Tarkavia after the horrible “War Cheese” incident.)

New Zealand: Think of New Zealand. That is what we’re describing.

The Realm of the Lost: Have you ever lost a thing? Your keys, a toy, your mind, the Eiffel Tower (it’s happened to all of us, don’t even worry about it). Well the Realm of the Lost is where all of that stuff eventually winds up. (If you manage to find your junk within two months of losing it you get to keep it, but after that it gets sucked into the Center of the Earth). Superheroes often have to venture there in order to track down some supervillain-built device that they need to stop some other threat.

Just a big ol’ ball of molten lava: This another situation where you’re gonna want to start climbing back up that tunnel. Clearly your schedule was off, it’s the lava monster’s day, you’re gonna have to come back another time.

A bar where everyone you knows gathers to talk smack about you specifically. As tempting as it might be, I really recommend not sticking around for this either.

Endless riches and treasures: As we said, Tuesdays and every fourth Thursday. Bring a large sack and watch out for the golden crab/shark that eats anybody who tries to take anything.

The Swirl: The Swirl is an endless loop in an endless loops. It loops and it swirls and swirls and it loops. It is every color and no color and yet some colors but seriously no colors. It swirls. It loops. It drives those who are foolish enough to gaze upon it to completely madness. It is the Swirl and soon, the Swirl will be you.

The past: Sometimes the Center of the Earth is just a time vortex. You spend all that time trying to get down there only to have your consciousness shunted back in time. There’s no telling how far back you’ll end up. If you’re lucky you’ll just end up at the beginning of the day. If you’re unlucky your mind will be shunted all the way back to when you were a baby. That would suck.

Shmendrick: Shmendrick knew you would arrive. He’s been expecting you. He’s a little bit disappointed that you’re so late but no matter, you’re here now and that’s all that matters. You’re not really confident you know Shmendrick, but he seems to know exactly who you are and it seems like it would be rude of you to not just go along with it. So you and Shmendrick will have a nice dinner, just the two of you. To your surprise the conversation flows flawlessly. Shmendrick is actually a pretty interesting guy. Did you know he invented the can-can? You have such a lovely time with Shmendrick that you make plans for the very next day. You wake up that morning more excited that you’ve been in a very long time. You can’t wait to get back to the Center of the Earth to spend some more time with your new pal Shmendrick. You hurry over to the tunnel, rappel down it, pry open the door to the Center of the Earth, only to find that its dinosaurs today. Shmendrick is no longer there. You may never see him again.

The Center of the Earth is a strange and mystical and magical place and you can never be quite sure what to expect. So just pack up everything you can and hope it’s not dinosaurs or lava! Good luck!

#superhero #superheroes #comics #comedy #humor #The Center of the Earth #Middle Earth #dinosaurs #Shmendrick #The Swirl #Tarkavia

5 notes · View notes

daggerzine · 4 years

Text

R.E. Seraphin molds tiny shapes into big songs.

Though he’s been on the scene for a while now (with different bands) I hadn’t heard the music of Bay Area musician R.E. “Ray” Seraphin until this year via a cassette called Tiny Shapes via Paisley Shirt Records (more on the label below). His first real band was Talkies, which he discusses below (and I have enjoyed), but he seems to have really come into his own this year with that cassette and a new EP, A Room Forever, which came out just a month or so ago. In his music you’ll hear influences of 80’s jangle pop as well as some deeper post-punk stuff (and for more current stuff I hear whispers of Dean Wareham and his bands and Wild Nothing). Reading below he seems very well grounded and seems to have a great attitude about everything (even not being able to play shows during a pandemic or being in a writing slump). I think once this is all over this guy will go on 5-year tour and gain lots and lots of new fans. In the meantime do check out his stuff, you won’t be disappointed.

Where did you grow up?

Berkeley, CA. The area I grew up in was filled with Victorian homes and dilapidated industrial warehouses. My family home was walking distance from a lagoon and an old, rusty set of train tracks. I felt I lived in an unremarkable college town. There wasn't much activity outside of the school. I discovered Berkeley’s storied political and musical history much later in life. Now, of course, there are many books written about Berkeley, but I thought it was a kinda nondescript city as a kid.

Do you remember what band made you fall in love with music?

Dating myself hard here, but I remember being floored by The White Stripes’ “Fell in Love With a Girl” video when I was 11. The Top 40 music making the rounds on VH1 and MTV at the time was beyond dreck — a lot of Train, Staind, Matchbox 20. The White Stripes were the first band I was exposed to that made succinct, catchy, no-frills music. I was genuinely enthralled. Plus, the Lego animation in that video still holds up.

Was guitar your first instrument?

I started on bass. My first instrument was an extremely cheap, pointy BC Rich knockoff monstrosity. I believe I was 13. I had no idea how to play and little interest in learning. For the first year, I putzed around with a Pro Co RAT, a wah pedal, and a tinny-sounding Crate practice amp. I just tried (and succeeded in) being as obnoxious as possible. When I started writing songs, I eventually graduated from playing bass poorly to playing guitar poorly.

Tell us about your first band.

My first band that played shows was called The Phil Spector Shotgun Experience. That was primarily a cover band I put together with my high school buddies and my mom. We covered Radio Birdman, the Pink Fairies, and the MC5; we also had an unwittingly hilarious original called “Nitroglycerin Man” — the first song I ever wrote (maybe I was subconsciously inspired by Wages of Fear). At some point, we kicked my mom out of the band and started playing as the Impediments. That band kicked ass — we made pridefully dumb American punk music. That was also my only band to sign a record contract, so it’s quite possibly been downhill from there!

Tell us about The Talkies (unless that was your first band mentioned above).

Talkies (no article!) was a group I started in 2014 as a vehicle for my songs. My previous bands had been more of a shared vision, so Talkies was my first foray into being the lone genius of a group. The sound was mostly drawn from what is disparagingly known as power pop. Basically, I was heavily into the band Shoes for a few years.

We released a few albums and EPs. Did a couple short tours. During that time, the project was dragged from the Bay Area to Austin and back before I finally, mercifully pulled the plug last year. It was time.

When did you transition from Talkies to the solo stuff you’re doing now? Did it feel comfortable?

Talkies had run its course, but I had a smattering of songs leftover from that project that I wanted to record. Around that time, I learned my good friend Jasper Leach (Burner Herzog) was getting ready to skip town. I had always wanted to work with him and, seizing my final opportunity to do so, we banged out my début, Tiny Shapes, last summer. The whole experience was fairly serendipitous. The stars aligned for that one.

I wouldn't say the process was comfortable. Recording the album felt necessary, urgent — almost compulsory at times. My heart was ready for a new project and I truly wanted to center myself for the first time. I’m glad I did. This is the happiest I’ve been musically in some time.

“I think therefore I am”

I love the songs on A Room Forever. How did they come together?

So glad to hear that! I got asked to contribute to a compilation back in April. With the deadline approaching and inspiration still eluding me, I took a glance at my bookshelf, noticed a particular Carson McCullers title, and whipped up “Clock Without Hands.” After my trusty collaborator Owen Adair Kelley added his parts, I felt we had stumbled upon a great sound. I tried to harness the creative spirit and pushed myself to finish a few ideas buried deep in the recesses of my Voice Memo app. I got friends Matt Bullimore (The Mantles) and Yea-Ming Chen (Yea-Ming & The Rumors) involved, and that was that. No great origin story — just pure American ingenuity and elbow grease.

Tell us about Paisley Shirt Records. Who runs it and how did you hook up with them?

Paisley Shirt Records is simply the man, the myth, the legend — Kevin Linn. He is a San Francisco-based musician and artist who records as Sad-Eyed Beatniks.

I met him when I was looking for someone to release my album, Tiny Shapes. He had just put out a tape by Hits — a great local band featuring some friends of mine — and I felt a kinship with his roster. So, I reached out to him. Foolishly, he agreed to put out my album and we’ve been inseparable ever since. Solid dude. High marks.

Have you done any solo tours? If so where and how did they go?

Ha! No. I had only notched two shows as R.E. Seraphin before the pandemic hit. Likely not doing anything beyond the odd live-stream show for a while. That said, if any tastemaking European touring agencies are reading this — give me a ring!

The latest EP

What are your top 10 desert island discs?

Ah, jeez. This question. I’ll just say these are 10 (plus one) that I come back to quite often. In no order:

Marquee Moon by Television

The Everly Brothers’ Best

Forever Changes by Love

Let it Be by The Replacements

Third/Sister Lovers by Big Star

The First Songs by Laura Nyro

16 Lovers Lane by The Go-Betweens

In a Silent Way by Miles Davis

A Different Kind of Tension by Buzzcocks

Something Else by The Kinks

Old No. 1 by Guy Clark

What are a few Bay Area bands that we should know about.

This is a golden-era for weirdo pop music in the Bay. To name just a few: Galore, Cindy, The Umbrellas, Tony Jay, Flowertown, Healing Potpourri, Latitude, Cocktails, The Reds, Pinks, & Purples, Yea-Ming & The Rumors, Anna Hillburg, the 1981, Toner, Frank Ene, Neutrals, Owen Adair Kelley, April Magazine, Telephone Numbers, Hits, Sad-Eyed Beatniks. Essentially every act associated with Paisley Shirt Records and/or Mt.St.Mtn. My bias is strong.

Do you feel that the pandemic has helped your songwriting or hindered it (if either)?

A li’l column A, a li’l column B. I’m a natural procrastinator, so I’ve definitely savored the lack of band practice and shows (things that often necessitate new material). That said, I doubt I would have finished A Room Forever had I not been quarantined at home. Without having many obligations and without being able to leave my house, music definitely became my raison d’être for the first time as an adult. I was fortunate to not be deemed an “essential” worker and to be able to focus energy on my passion momentarily. Silver lining.

What’s next ? A new record by the end of the year possibly?

Hopefully continuing to promote my music and play shows on the ol’ webiverse. A Room Forever will be receiving a small vinyl and tape pressing at the end of September via Mt.St.Mtn. and Paisley Shirt Records. So, looking forward to that.

I was creatively tapped for a few months after A Room Forever. While a new album is possible, it’s not probable. I am plugging away at a few tunes, but I tend to conceptualize albums as a thematic whole and not as a collection of songs. Haven't stumbled onto my next Big Idea yet. Don't count me out, though. I could see myself dashing off a covers album for sure.

What is one song you wish you’d written?

Too many to name! I’ll reframe that question to mean a great song I could see myself capable of writing in an alternate time, place, or dimension. Maybe one of Peter Holsapple’s songs from The dB’s — “Black & White” or “Neverland.” Also: anything by Wreckless Eric or Martin Newell.

Final thoughts? Closing comments?

Just finished reading an interview with the great James Purdy, and thought this quote summed up iur current political climate well:

“You go out into the world and no one knows you, you can be ruled because you’re programmed. Everything is stamped, put on the shelf, described, thrown out into the garbage. It’s a political process, and behind that an economic process. But to be nothing, that is the worst of all possible things.”

www.reseraphin.com

www.paisleyshirtrecords.bandcamp.com

2 notes · View notes

prorevenge · 6 years

Text

Destroy my childhood, ruin my chance at college, and laugh when I said I was homeless? Lol cool, I'll ruin your life.

Long story. TL;DR at the end.

BACKSTORY: My mother was a really shitty person. I have 4 other siblings. One older sister, 3 way younger, 3 different dads. Before I was born (im a male btw), my oldest sister was taken away from my mother when she was a few months old because she tried to stab/slice the father of my sister WHILE HE WAS HOLDING HER. She lost custody and the dude left her. Older sister goes to live with her fathers family in a different city. CUE LIL OL ME COMING INTO THIS SEXY WORLD. My dad went to jail 2-3 years after I was born for a while, I rarely saw him. He's an alcoholic if that matters. She was a single mother but she made it work and she worked hard. One of the bigger problems was that she took out all her agression and hatred of my father on me as well as work stress and etc. She dealt with sexual abuse growing up which I'm sure definitely affected her relationships and how she treated me as well. Anyways...

Cue me being abused from the age of 4-5 to about 17. Every day was hell. She was extremely strict and her perspective was warped. She was also pretty big in stature and had alot of strength. Examples of her being shitty: I've gotten beaten up badly once because HER room was dirty. The dishes weren't washed and I got beaten soon as I got home, even if there werent dishes when I left to school. If i walked too loud, id get my ass beat. She broke my nose for looking at her the wrong way on my 10th birthday when she brought me a cake I was allergic too(It had peanuts, she knows im slightly allergic but feigned ignorance..) It was more or less every day or every other day. She used her fists/elbows/extension cords/hangers/chairs/canes/bats/etc. Whatever she could find I was getting beaten with. I couldn't ever escape to my room for long because she would always call me every few minutes to get her things or to yell at me. She never drank or did drugs or anything. Whenever she was upset and I happened to be in front of her she'd kick me down the stairs to make me hurry up. She's put a knife to my neck before and had to be forcibly stopped by her bf of the time. Burned my christmas presents from other people (she didnt get me anything that year) and just other really shitty things. The only thing I will say, she tried really hard to make up for it with video games and electronics and etc. It didn't make a difference to me though, it never helped.

She controlled most aspects of my life. I got by with little petty revenges. Peeing in the lipton iced tea she drank. Rubbing her forks and spoons between ny buttcheeks before i served her dinner. Ignoring her screams for help when she had kidney stones (how tf am i supposed to help anyways??) But by the time i got to highschool I turned to alcohol. I resented her and the negative atmosphere affected who I was as a person. I started to be cold and uncaring. Calculated. She started kicking me out every few months telling me to find somewhere else to live by age 15. She sent me away to a different country for a year and tried to keep my passport but I made it back to the US with the help of the embassy and my step father (she'd already left by that time and found some other dude). I came back senior year with no credits for the prior grade which ended with me getting a GED. I spent most of the time i could with my best friend and started working shitty jobs. I was terrible at saving as i had accumulated loads of shitty habits while growing up so it didnt make much difference. She eventually told me that If i went to college, I would ALWAYS have a place to live until I finished. Cue my first 2 semesters at a 2 year college, I maintained a 3.7ish gpa. My teachers loved me and it was my escape. Towards the end of my 2nd semester during finals, i came home late one night around 10pm and my mother yanks the door open screaming in my face asking when I'll move out. I'm slightly drunk and decide to completely ignore her and walk to my room. If I opened my mouth, that day would be the day I blew up and cursed her out. I've rarely ever raised my voice at her because it never ended well. Now at this point im 19 and I've been doing school full time with no savings. Im also fairly fit and could easily take my mom at this point (Never laid a hand on her or any woman, i hate violence). I get to my room, she rips my door open, and starts yelling. I say nothing and stare at her. She walks away and called the police on me saying she thought id murder her and my younger siblings. I don't know where the fuck she got that idea from as she's the one who's nearly killed me many times.

I packed everything into a duffle bag and left 5 minutes afterwards. I failed all of my finals because I couldnt make it to my school. Things kinda spiraled and the next 2-3 years were me on and off homeless. I survived the best I could in a big city with no college degree and made alot of shitty choices due to my shitty habits. Eventually i found a profitable hobby that gave me meaning and through that i started to work my way up. Got my own apartment, had a full time job, and did my hobby on the side. I hadn't kept up contact with my mother at all but my younger sister who was old enough to have a phone found me on social media so i saw photos and such, she didn't have it anywhere near as bad but she did get beaten occasionally. My mother reached out via email all smiles asking how I've been. Now guys, ive always been envious of the relationship most ppl have with their moms so I gave her a chance and gave her a call. We talked for a few minutes and everything was civil and seemed like things would go okay but then...

She asked me what I've been up to the last few years and I told her honestly, that I was homeless for a while and struggled alot after what she did to me but I worked my way out of it. SHE LITERALLY LAUGHS. She laughed for a few seconds in a very condescending kinda chuckle and then said "I never did a thing to you so you don't know what abuse is! its your own damn fault you were homeless. So how about yo-" but by that point I hung up. I was speechless and fuming. I don't know what abuse is? OKAY BITCH. IVE SPENT TOO FUCKING LONG LETTING YOU DESTROY MY SANITY. NOW IS THE TIME.

There was a few things my mother didn't know. One, I knew for a fact that current well paying job she had was gotten on lies as she never got her college degree and lied about it on her resume. Two, I had access to all of her email accounts and cloud storage accounts since I was the one that set them up when I was younger and she never changes her passwords. Lastly, she DEFINITELY wasn't aware that from 13yrs old and onto the last time she hit me I took photos of ALL my bruises/marks/wounds/bloody noses saving them to my computer and then google drive. ON TOP OF THAT, my little sister had been sending me photos via social media of the bruises she got from my mom.

The first thing I did was compile ALL of those photos/videos into one folder. I then reached out to CPS in my city and explained that my siblings were being abused, how I was abused in the past, and that I had mountains of proof. Since ive called the cops on my mother before AND the thing that happened with my older sister, there was immediately a home visit. They arrived almost a day later with the police and coincidentally my mother was literally in the process of beating my younger sister when they were knocking. Cue an Emergency removal of all my siblings from the house and my mother getting arrested though she was released hours later. (I was getting a day to day play by play because my mothers best friend is a blabber mouth and everything my mother said she told her son who relayed it to me without either of their knowledge.) I sent CPS all the evidence and there's a legit case against my mother now. The next day I emailed and then called up her job to inform them that she had lied about having a very necessary college degree as well current events in her life which sparked a background check. She was fired days later. Say adios to 75k and a blacklist in the only industry you know how to work. I then spitefully deleted every cloud account and email address I ever made for her, which was all of them which im sure will make keeping up with alot bills and etc nearly impossible. I then anonymously reported her to the IRS because of the tax fraud she committed for years by claiming people's children that weren't hers with ALOT of detailed information since I lived with her while she did it.

So now, my mother lost all her kids and her job. Im meeting with a caseworker from CPS next week to talk more about what happens moving forward but I do know they're NOT going back. Idk how she's gonna pay her mortgage now and survive. I'm sure she's gonna get a call from the IRS who'll be looking for a few thousand dollars she owes them. She also has to go back to court in a few months, not exactly sure what she was charged with but ill update when I find out how everything turns out.

Side Note: She isn't aware im the cause of any of this. I plan on keeping tabs on her and waiting until it seems like she's close to death before I tell her it was all me and I peed in her lipton.

TL;DR - My mother abuses me badly for most of my life as well as my younger siblings. I have to drop out of college and support myself after she drove me to homelessness. She proceeds to laugh at me about me being homeless and denys abuse. So I ruined her life by getting my younger siblings removed and her arrested, making her lose her job, reported her to the IRS, and essentially set her up so that the remainder of her life is full of disaster and hardships.

(source) (story by howbout_that_lipton)

#prorevenge #by howbout_that_lipton #pro revenge #revenge stories #pro revenge stories #pro #revenge #revenge story #last10 #updated

2K notes · View notes