#wish I could believe you but if you want to scam people by making them feel sorry for a sick cat that doesn't exist you need to try harder

[crabussy]

Hi! First of all I would like to apologize as I might really need your help, I know that you might find this ask weird and inappropriate at the same time but I do have huge favor to ask if you would be so kind to please check my pinned post, because its for my cat who needs an immediate life saving surgery and If you feel it in your heart to help me with this, please do boost or share it and I would be eternally grateful. 😭

okay two day old account

[mrpenguinpants]

Green Slumber

— "Ah, look! Is Alhaitham taking a nap?" "Shh...You're too loud, Paimon." "Th-That's not true…Paimon was definitely whispering-wait, who is that beside him?"

— Alhaitham

Ayato Ver: Pale Blue Slumber Traveller & Paimon lines are taken from the official Genshin Twitter post. [Masterlist]

Congrats Alhaitham, your birthday postpones the fic where I tear you apart for scamming me. I usually don't write birthday fics but pretty art. Can you tell I'm not used to writing second pov and rushed again :)) I don't know how to end fics.

"Ah, look! Is Alhaitham taking a nap?"

Lumine looks in the direction of Paimon's voice, her floating companion peeking through a room with a giddy face. No doubt hatching some sort of plan to get back at the scribe for his words during their quest to rescue Lesser Lord Kusanali. On one hand, she should probably scold Paimon for immediately jumping to payback since the reason both of them are here is to wish the man a happy birthday before departing to the next region. But on the other hand...

“Shh…You’re too loud Paimon,” Lumine whispers as she tip-toes towards the door and gently pushes it open further. She's pointedly ignoring the face Paimon is throwing her for acting just as bad as she is. If anyone asks, she'll make an excuse that she was just being a polite guest and if Alhaitham was sleeping, she would excuse herself quietly. In no way is it her curiosity to see the ever-serious Alhaitham in any mode that's defenseless and relaxed. So with Paimon’s head hovering above hers, they both poke their heads into the room. Alhaitham doesn’t look any different from the last time they met, although asleep, he looks far less intimidating. He’s leaned back in the wooden chair, arm propped up to hold his lolling head in place. Calculating amber and teal eyes are closed as his chest falls up and down slowly with each breath while the gentle sun paints him in warm yellows and soothing whites. If Lumine had never met Alhaitham before, she would have thought he may have been the Dendro archon with how serene the scene itself is. Something that almost makes her want to reach out and touch him just to check if he’s real or not.

"Th-That's not true…Paimon was definitely whispering-wait, who is that beside him?" Paimon’s voice tapers off at the end, eyes alight with confusion. Lumine tears her eyes away from Alhaitham to look at where Paimon is pointing. Seated on the desk right in front of Alhaitham’s sleeping figure, a stranger hums softly with their ankles locked as they swing their legs ideally in the air. In their hands appears to be the beige book Alhaitham usually carries around, the one about physics and motion if she remembers correctly. Now that she’s looking - she can't believe she missed an entire person because she got distracted by the image of a sleeping Alhaitham - the stranger looks far more comfortable in the room than she is. Maybe they're another roommate? Although Alhaitham doesn't seem like the type to have an extensive list of friends and she's positive she's met most if not all of the people Alhaitham could call close enough to have them in his home. She shares a look with Paimon who returns it with a shrug of the shoulders. Neither one of them has ever seen this mysterious person before.

"Haitham, this section here about..." the stranger's voice brings blue and yellow eyes back to the room. Lumine watches intrigued as the stranger finally looks up from the book to see Alhaitham fast asleep. A soft sigh escapes their lips as they close the book, shoulders dropping into something more relaxed, and they just sit and look at the man. They have the same look in their eye but instead, their hand slowly reaches out until their fingertips meet the tips of soft silver hair. Pushing strands away from his face before waltzing down to caress his cheek. It's an intimate touch and Lumine isn't sure whether she should be here interrupting the moment. The stranger surely seems to be having fun as they return to playing with silver strands. Through it all, Alhaitham remains asleep yet, his body seems to lean into the touch naturally. As if these practiced movements have happened before.

Oh. Oh, she understands now.

“Hey, Paimon…” Lumine starts as she slowly picks herself off the floor as quietly as possible lest she disturbs the peace. "We should leave."

"Huh? But why? We've never seen this person before right? What if they're one of those bad guys that are after Alhaitham because he's the acting grand sage!" Paimon adamantly nods, small hands clutched into little fists. It would be cute if it weren't for the fact that Paimon has no sense of volume. Before Lumine can reach out and press her palm against Paimon's mouth to stop her from shouting again, a light chuckle rings out. They both freeze in place, flicking their heads back inside the room.

"You know...if you talk any louder you will actually wake him up," the stranger drops their hand as they turn to face the duo. There's mirth dancing in their eyes and Lumine has enough decency to look embarrassed at getting caught red-handed. Paimon on the other hand has no such reservations.

"Ah, sorry! We didn't mean to! Wait-Hey! Don't turn this on Paimon. Who are you and what are you doing in Alhaitham's house?!" Paimon stomps her feet in the air, crossing her arms as she pouts at the stranger. Her frown further increased by the stranger laughing harder.

"I basically live here. There's no need to be so on edge. I doubt Haitham could sleep so easily if a stranger was in his home," they say, gesturing to the still peacefully unaware scribe who hasn't moved a muscle since they arrived.

"Ohh, so you're like that blond guy from before! Ka-Ka something? But wait, why were you touc-"

"Ahem, sorry for barging in. We just wanted to say Happy Birthday to Alhaitham. We'll visit again some other time when he's awake," Lumine cuts Paimon off, successfully managing to slap her hand against Paimon's mouth. She can feel the back of her ears turning red as she bows and practically sprints away and out of the house. She'll just write a note to the scribe instead.

+

You blink a few times before chuckling again. Wow, that girl sure can run fast. You've heard stories about the Traveller and this "Paimon" character, patiently waiting for your turn to stumble into their journey. Although you wish you had met them with better first impressions, they seem like a lively bunch. Your eyes slide over back onto the sleeping figure in front of you, and there's a slight nudge of his lips. The smallest of smiles threaten to burst before it placates into something more neutral. A small detail that hasn't escaped you.

"I know you're awake Alhaitham," you state blankly, your gentle hands reaching back up before suddenly turning harsh and tugging at his cheek. Pulling the skin so he has a lopsided smile. True to your words, teal and amber eyes open without an ounce of shame. "Weren't those your friends? Don't be rude and ignore them when they came all this way to say happy birthday."

He offers a half-hearted shrug before the hand supporting his head moves to take your fingers still tugging at his cheek. Intertwining them together until his face is free. His smile is still small but his eyes shine with fondness that you're forced to look away. Sometimes you forget just how pretty Alhaitham can be.

"Weren't you the one that said I should indulge on my special day? Is it so wrong that I want to spend it with you and you alone?" He adds to his point by brushing his lips against your fingertips before pressing a kiss to your palm. There's a small smile as he extends his other hand out, eyes taking in how pink your ears become. "So let's indulge."

“For such a pretty face, you sure are…” you trail off but you take his hand and let him move you onto his lap. It's unfair how fast he can turn the tables on you and how easily you let him do so. It was fun being able to poke and prod the man to your heart's content since he had to hold the disguise of being asleep, even if you do feel a bit bad that the Traveller had to postpone their greeting, but now it's his hands that roam over your body. Slipping under your - his - shirt and rubbing small circles into your hip before growing bored and moving onto another patch of untouched skin until there's nothing left to take. Lip hungry as he kisses away your words because every breath that isn't mixed with his is worthless. Perhaps it's a blessing that you need to take a proper breath because you're sure that Alhaitham would keep taking until there's nothing left. Disregarding how tightly your hands cling to him and refuse to let him stray too far away.

"Greedy."

"Pot meet kettle."

---

[taglist]  <- if you want to be added, please read this first.

@genshins1mpact @creatorofstars @xoneaboveallx @timmyitsmeeee @raingoesboomboom @duhsies @thegayrubberducky @isa-solasun @afoxesgreed @yuuki4646 @angel-luv-04 @inlovewithwaffles @maddymints09 @moonssandstars @ieathairs @crypticbibliophile @cumbermovels @totallynotaraidensimp

[bigification]

Careful What You Wish For

I lay the cheap looking lamp on my bathroom counter as I get ready for a bath. I can't believe I caved and bought it, it's obviously a scam. This stupid lamp isn't gonna grant any wishes, that old man just got some free cash out of me. It doesn't matter, I'll just take a relaxing bath and throw on some Netflix later.

I get undressed and run some hot water into the bath. Some scented candles set the mood for relaxation, and I throw on some music. I dip myself into the warm water, and lay back.

My relaxation doesn't last long however, as a rumbling catches my attention. It's the lamp. It's vibrating with enough force that I can feel it from across the bathroom. Suddenly a purple smoke emerges from the lamp.

"I may grant you one wish." A soft whisper echoes out of the smoke.

What the actual fuck. This isn't possible. Did that guy drug me? Maybe I should just say a wish to see if it's true.

"I wish to be a more mature looking guy who likes sports." I blurt out. I've always hated how much I look like a teenager despite being a full blown adult, so this could fix that. Also I wouldn't mind being a fit guy who likes sports, it wouldn't hurt.

The moment I say it, the smoke starts to travel towards me. All the smoke spirals into my mouth and nose. I should be scared, but it kinda feels nice. A warm feeling sprouts in the core of my body, making me feel relaxed again.

As the smoke fills my body, I feel my muscles twitching. It must be true, my body is changing. My twig like arms thicken, with bulging biceps and defined forearms. My soft hands grow twice as big and fill with rough callouses. My chest puffs out into two juicy pecs and my stomach flattens into a cut six pack. My thighs thicken as I feel my ass plump up. Even my feet look like they've grown a few sizes. I also have to start bending my legs, as Ive become too tall for the bath tub I'm sitting in.

I look at my reflection in the water and see a handsome man in his late twenties. Holy shit, I'm hot! I've got a chiselled jawline with a dark beard covering it. All my features seem more angular, more manly. As I'm observing my reflection, I notice a pelt of dark hair grow all over my body. My chest, my arms, my legs, everywhere is dusted in a coat of hair.

This is everything I wanted. Even the sports. Memories of playing sports all throughout school flood my mind. I especially liked soccer, though I also really liked weight lifting. More memories of my extensive sex life flood my mind, people are almost hypnotised by my good looks.

Just as I'm reminiscing about my past, I remember I should be working out right now. I can't skimp out on my workout routine. I go to get out of the bath and notice I've got my underwear on. Huh, I must have forgotten to take it off before getting in the bath.

As I'm stepping out of the bath, something feels wrong. A warm feeling once again fills my core. I look down and see my six pack fade under a belly of fat. It continues growing until it sags over my underwear. My pecs swell into a pair of man tits, though they still have a solid base of muscle. My arms double in size, though with a soft layer of fat now covering the muscles. My hands thicken until they look like stuffed sausages, as more rough features cover them.

I feel my underwear tighten around my waist as my ass fattens. My thighs thicken until there is no gap between them, and my feet grow many sizes. I even feel my perspective shift higher, as my height increases.

The dark hairs on my body fade to an almost white colour as the hair thickens around my body. As I'm looking down at my body, I notice hair on my head fall to the ground. I look in horror at my reflection in the mirror, I have to duck just to fully see my face. My hairline recedes all the way to the back of my head, leaving me practically bald. My once sharp facial features have softened under a layer of fat. And a double chin has formed under my beard. I look so old.

Though the more I stare at my body, the more familiar it becomes. Memories flood into my mind of my career in soccer. I was a high level player, and a popular one at that. But you age out of professional soccer in your late thirties. I started focusing more on the weight lifting and less on the cardio. There was only so long I could keep that six pack, and turning 50 certainly didn't help with that. I don't mind it though, it makes me feel more manly. And it makes the team I coach more afraid of me.

I snap out of my trance. I grab a towel and start to dry off. Damn I forgot to take off my underwear again, I should get rid of this one anyway, it doesn't fit me anymore. I duck and look at myself in the mirror.

"Lookin good coach." I say as I smile at myself.

I turn to the other side of the bathroom and step on my scale. It reads '350'.

"Damn, I've really let go of myself, huh." I say as I jiggle my gut.

I also measure my height, it reads 6"6. I should have gone into volleyball with the build I had.

I dry off and leave the bathroom. I grab a family sized bag of chips and lay my fat ass down on the couch. I open the tv and it's already on the world cup. I really wouldn't want it any other way.

[mariii1]

🧚🏾‍♀️Messages From Your Queer Ancestors✨

I'm backkkkk, check Patreon for my extended general version of this reading!

AHHHH I'm so excited to launch my Patreon, you guys don't even know about all the ideas I have lined up and I'm sure there's more to come as this month goes on! Anyway these photos are all from pinterest buttt see if you can guess who's a very important figure and whyy 😽

1. So a few of you in this pile are trying to force yourself to forgive qhen you don't actually want to (or need to) and for the rest you're almost bulldozing over your identity and how it's affected you. I have a feeling you hang around people who don't know about your identities and would outright make fun of you or disrespect you in some way because of it. Your ancestors are way more sad than angry; if anything they're sad that these people are around you and they're sad that you don't honor or place importance on those aspects of your identity enough to walk away from them. Some of you might believe you'll never find people who truly accept and understand all these aspects of you so you've completely given up on it. Your environment might now is definitely very homophobic/transphobic or just xenophobic in general. While you might've been born in these environment or have had to stay in it, your queer ancestors want you to believe in yourself and in your queer identities; those aspects matter just as much as other parts of yourself. They want you to focus on creating an exit/escape plan out of this situation and to find the strength and hope in you to believe you will be able to find the right people one day instead of just completely shutting this idea out.

2. Things are going to change for you very, very soon. Some of you may be doubting a partner or a close friend in terms of loyalty or how much they love/respect you, but you'll soon realize these are just fears with no real basis. You will hit the jackpot somehow or you'll realize you have already in some area of your life. If you're financially broke right now, there's an idea or action you take that'll be the jackpot literally in terms of money and its something you didn't expect to happen, or at least to such a large degree. Keep doing what you're doing and the truth will be revealed to you soon.

3. I feel like me and your queer ancestors would've been good buddies and they've been so nice to me since the beginning of this reading. You're blessed spirituality in terms of family even if your immediate family right now is dog shit. You all however are really tired. I'm getting for most of you this isn't necessarily physically but more tired of people trying to fuck you over or fuck with you in general. You might've had to cut a lot of people out and seek justice or revenge in some way; ways that might be very tedious or draining like filing paperwork, legal battles, etc. I'm sincerely sorry if you have experienced some form of assault especially sexual assault please rest assured you will get justice whether through the system or not. You feel really tired pile 3 and this might sound infantilizing but I mean it in the sweetest way, you need a hug. You need someone to be understanding of you and you might wish you had someone physical to rant to. This might not bring you much comfort but your ancestors are watching your struggles and they wish they could coddle and baby you. A few of them see you as a baby and it breaks their heart that their baby is so stressed out 🥹 they are still proud of you and are rooting for you ad wish to send you lots of money so you can focus on self-care. Don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it pile 3!

4. Some of you feel very stagnant or just stuck in a situation especially financially. You might've realized something was a scam or actually wasn't going to lead to anything more; this could be about staying at a toxic workplace in hopes of getting a promotion or being transferred to a better team. I'm also having a hard time focusing on your reading so you might just be feeling overwhelmed or scattered. You realized a situation would never get better but now you don't know what to do or you've convinced yourself you have no other options left that are any better. However, I'm getting this really isn't true and it might take a drastic change in your mindset in order to see the potential of other possibilities. This could be realizing going back to school or learning a trade might not be so bad or that maybe relying on online income (influencing, youtube, etc.) Could actually be a real plan. These are just examples but your queer ancestors are really begging you to try and think outside of the box and realize "standard" job opportunities might not be as reliable as they seem and that options that seem very flaky, can be very stable if you put in the work.

[goodolddumbbanana]

I don't think a lot of people realize the reason why Sun acts nonchalant with Moon while just after the last episode, Sun just said out loud that he doesn't think his relationship with Old Moon is good.

Old moon, or Moon now, he is not an enemy or a stranger. He is his brother, the one who stayed with Sun longest, for better or worse, from the very beginning. They only have each other, and even if they fought a lot back then, they couldn't survive if one of them died. (Moon would go crazy due to KC, and Sun would get scrapped for him couldn't make enough money to keep the daycare float.)

Their relationship is horribly toxic, not because of how terrible Moon treated Sun, or how Sun completely relied on Moon, but also because Sun and Moon love and care for each other so deeply.

Surely, there were some moments when things got worse, but isn't any relationship end ups like that sometimes? That is what the victim of abused relationships, or from a family abuse always believes.

It is my fault. Maybe I have done something wrong. Maybe I shouldn't pushed him too hard. Maybe if I could control Eclipse better, Moon wouldn't be mad like that. I shouldn't break Moon's computer. It was not Moon's fault, it was his KC active. It was not Moon's fault, I am the one who did something stupid.

Because despite all of Moon's flaws, Moon was not entirely terrible with Sun. They still have a lot of good old dynamic siblings moments, and Moon always the one who fixes the mess Sun ends up (getting scammed from Monty) and sometimes, saves Sun from Moon's mess (Eclipse).

Moon was not only the one who hurt Sun, but he was also the one who saved and cared for him, the source of both his joy and his despair. And isn't it sad? When the one who loves you deeply is the one who hurts you most? The one who would sacrifice the world for you, is the one to make your life a living hell?

That's the reason why, a lot of victims from an abusive house, couldn't cut ties with their families, especially if the relationship is not built on thoroughly manipulation like Eclipse and Lunar.

We can see that, Sun at first, didn't even realise their relationship was bad. He has Earth, even the New Moon points that out for him, but he still stubbornly thinks all of this happened, (Lunar blew up, Eclipse took the star, Old Moon died) was his fault only.

It was not until when Sun distanced himself from Moon like for a whole year, and through a lot of therapies with Earth and New Moon, and with him hung out more with Foxy, Freddy, Lunar, Earth,... making him realise how awful his relationship with Old Moon.

And still, Sun can't help but love the Old Moon, but miss him. Because letting Moon go means cutting a part of Sun's heart. It means he is selfish, ungrateful, for abandoning the one who always was there for him, until they died. It means all of their love, all of their time they shared together was meaningless.

I think Sun realised how easily he can just to say fuck off with Moon and never let Moon walk into Sun's life again. Because Moon and Monty and the others, they will understand Sun's wishes (maybe, not so sure) . But then it would mean Sun would be alone. He already lost the Old Moon, then the New Moon, I don't think he has a heart to go through this again.

Across the multiverse, the tragic destiny of a Sun, if he is not dead, then he would be forever alone, distanced from the others.

Furthermore, even if you stand your ground and say I would never forgive my abuser, you can't just do it. It does not work like that. Either this abuser gets out of your life and you never see them again, or some of your behaviour is still exactly just like when you and your abuser still stay together.

It's kind of confusing explaining but for some people, their PTSD makes them do exactly what they don't want to. Like even scared and hated their abuser so much, but still the victims find themselves comfortable to hangout and cheerful around the abuser.

For example, you might have said you hated someone's guts so bad and how terrible they have been treating you with everybody around, but as soon as this individual shows up, all of your negative emotions are just gone, flushed away into the thin air.

Sun trauma dumps a lot. He is not aware of it, or it is not his conscious choice, due to how bad he has been treated by Moon and how he needed to suppress his feelings to keep Moon happy and stay sane, that... Make Sun's word seems contrary to his actions sometimes.

Unreliable narrative symptoms.

No wonder why he seems to forgive Moon so quickly. He didn't. He just doesn't let his emotions get better of himself and for more worse reasons, seeing Moon make him regression back from where everything is good and cool and maybe not bad.

He still hates Moon, bitter of how Moon treated him. But Sun after trauma and trauma, has been so tired now. I feel like if Sun is a human, he just sleeps a day and never wants to get out of his bed.

Caring seems like a torture chores with Sun right now, and he now just lives out of his spite and hope nothing would go even worse.

I think if Moon ever goes bad again, it would be the last straw for Sun. Right now, Sun just seems unresponsive just because he is waiting. Waiting for when another shoe drops, waiting for Moon to snap again.

And when it happens, I think Sun will finally get a chance to cut ties of Moon.

Because for some people, even with someone who has long toxic co-dependent relationships, you only stay in that mess because you are caring and find something worth staying .

[konigsprinzessin]

donnerkeil. part five, yandere!könig x reader

hey! sorry about the hiatus. not proofread. love you all.

mentally, he cursed you for not letting him in. he didn't care. why the hell would he? he would be too focused on you anyways. admittingly, he would've scoped out your apartment to find any thing he might wanna bring with him as a little memory of you. if he were to find your bra or panties casted aside on your bedroom floor he would try his hardest to conceal them within his palm.

his eyes got wide and almost frantically told you that your messy flat was no problem. he wish you would jump in and invite him anyways. he watched you fidget on your phone, asking again from his phone number.

which he gave you and then texting you right after. a few more minutes passed with you far too excited asking when he was free and asking könig questions about his policework.

policework? that's right. he kept his answers light responding with "its confidential". earning cute little laughs from your mouth. you wrapped up the conversation a bit worried that you were wasting his time. "i don't know what the word is english but im responsible for the entire unit and go to most calls because i'm...." he paused, trying to word in in english. he shook his head and spoke very fast in his native language "uh, i'm the top? i don't know how to say this." he laughed nervously. unbeknownst to you, both of these things were lies. his english was that of a native speaker's, hell, his english was probably better than yours. and that "police work" of his wasn't exactly as innocent and naive as he put it, the call about teenagers graffitiing buildings nor the call about the cat stuck under the family car were true. simple lies that made him look like a hero. someone to trust. how doesn't someone trust a giant that helps everyone. it tugged at your heart strings when he told you about an elderly woman that fell victim to an online dating scam- that one got you annoyed in particular, feeling enraged on behalf of some older woman that didn't exist nor did he save from wire fraud. he made all of it up to gain your trust. he wanted you to believe he was the local police chief with no hard crimes such as murder or rape to deal with. you admired this. the first outsider you meet is an older, native austrian working with the police helping and saving people.

that was charm. charming to you.

"well, if you give me a few hours i would be able to meet up tonight for drinks, im sure theres a bar nearby." you laughed as you handed his black cased phone back to him. you thought the suave was radiating off you, asking him out so calmly without fidgeting or shaking. you'd be thinking about him all day.

könig didn't want to wait. he wanted to push you back in the door where you'd fall on your ass and struggle to get up to defend yourself. even if you kicked and shoved you would be no match for his taller and bulkier frame. you were short and petite, without a weapon you were a frail mouse with no defense. even if locks were on the doors, he had a bobby pin laying about. he made a mental note of the locks and if needed, how he could make his way in.

not now. and not tonight. he would have to give it a few weeks for the chemistry to brew and bake until you felt comfortable with him. he knew his physique in itself was intimidating- which he loved to use to his own advantage.

"yes, of couse! although i have to be in the office early tomorrow so i can not be out until 3 or 4 in the morning." he had training at that time. if he wasn't asleep by midnight he would be an agitated mess at the gym. he had recently acquired a handful of new recruits that he would need to train this week. all the paperwork had been filled and finished last week so now the physical workouts called. he was curious to see how many would dropout within this week- maybe he would tell you that to fit along with his policeman job like an average civilian not a colonel from what some believed to be a terrorist group.

you hummed in response. "new recruits i have to train, i am curious to see how many will leave in the following weeks." he exhaled. knowing his time was running out and he would need to leave your doorstep. last thing he needed to do was give you the creeps and make you worried. you smiled at his comment, letting out a small chuckle.

"i hope they all stay, you seem to be a good trainer." you closed your eyes, crows feet appearing around your temporarily closed eyes. "you have a lot of muscle. that's something to be proud of, i can barely move my boxes around."

"ah, thank you, (y/n), i know for some it can be hard to stay focused and work out every day. it takes viel bestimmung oder ausdauer" he laughed, apologizing for not knowing the words in english. secretly, he hoped you would know but another part of him hoped not. he was cruel and calculated, he would keep you locked away and speak only in german and watch as you become more and more confused, frustrated and scared with the language barrier. just that thought made his heart pound a little faster. he didn't want to torture you- rather scare you into obedience and submission. as long he didn't physically hurt you then there was no harm in what he intended on doing. he reminded himself that and repeated it again to keep his head on straight. "and i can help you with the boxes, i don't want you to hurt yourself."

your eyes brightened at this idea. a godsend, you thought. you dreaded those boxes stuffed in the corner of your room. it was quite the eye soar and bothered you. the boys that lived above you were nice enough to help you move all of your stuff in, besides the heavier things like the entire refrigerator or microwave which you surely weren't able to install nor the heavier boxes filled with a myriad of trinkets.

"i didn't feel like brining half of the stuff in the boxes and coming back downstairs. it would take me too long." you sighed, scratching the side of your cheek. "i also have to install the microwave and fridge and i still have to call the maintenance guys." you half laughed partly out of embarrassment, still smiling nonetheless.

könig laughed at how flustered you looked with your cheeks turning into a bright pink. it reminded him of rose flowers. "i don't mind doing all of that right now for you, (y/n). only if you have time." with this he realized that you literally just have moved in. how could you not have these things set up by now? he was going to take you before any of the locals realized that you were settled down and lived there.

"well, i certainly do." you opened the door a bit wider for him. you sat the bread basket down on a high table adorned with your housekeys, a dish filled with rocks and photo of who he assumed was your family back home. he watched you slip off your flats, grab the basket and walk into what he guessed was your kitched. he also followed suit with his shoes not trying to be rude or give you any hint that he was off. you met him no longer than two hours ago and he was alone with you in your fucking house. gently, he placed both of his shoes side by side thinking how stupid you were. imagine, if he was malicious or had a gun? you would be robbed and dead by now. yet, you were a caring little thing. too innocent for this world. too innocent for him. all he had to do was rush you and choke you until you were unconscious and figure out a way to get out. he began to seriously contemplate thing noting the door behind him and the slightly open windows letting a draft in with open blinds as he made he way behind you.

there you stood, back to him with your hands on your hips. the refrigerator was laid horizontally on the wooden floor. granted, it was a small apartment but it could fit two people. it was most definitely built for students. the microwave laid door up on the kitchen countertop. könig found solace in how normal this all was, like he was an old friend using his muscle to help you move in or a couple just moving into a new apartment. he enjoyed the ladder more than the former by a longshot.

"im thinking the fridge goes here." you motioned to an empty spot in the kitchenette next to a plus, undoubtedly where the old tenants had it. könig watched you slide around with your white ankle socks on. he was jolting every few minutes with a primal instinct to cover your mouth and threaten to kill you if you didn't comply. he would never hurt you, just empty threats to keep you from running or screaming...or both. könig's mind went blank responding with nods and hums as you talked about where the fucking microwave should go. you should go, go with him to his place on the other side of the city. he only came back into reality when you struggled to pick up the metal microwave, which was too heavy for your little bones to carry. he thought how stupid he must've looked...how creepy he must've looked as you picked the metal up with him solely staring at you.

[inhibitionfreewriting]

Right Person, Wrong Time (pt1)

(or Wrong Person, Wrong Time, from Hasan's perspective).

this is probably the most purposefully sad thing i've written and i really love it.

edit - 12/10: part 2 / part 3

🌠🌠

People are brought together for two reasons - weddings and funerals.

Hasan was grateful it was the former, though right about now he wished that it was a funeral. His funeral, or your betrothed's if he was really being honest with himself. Once upon a time that could have been him, standing at the end of the aisle and waiting for you to walk down. Your betrothed stands tall at the end of the aisle, hands clasped nervously in front of themselves, staring towards where you are supposed to make your entrance.

Hasan stands with the rest of the crowd and with his height towers over just enough to have a perfect view of you. He can feel his own heart tighten in his chest, beating erratically against his ribcage, drowning out the wedding march out of his ears.

You are ethereal. Dressed to the nines with your hair done to suit your face the best, cheeks with a noticeable twinge of heat to them, and nothing but love radiating from your eyes.

He is happy for you, he tells himself, working on memorizing the way the light hits your face as you walk.

He is not upset that you are reaching for someone else's hand and not his.

He does not seriously contemplate standing up to object to the wedding which is why he sounds surprised as his body moves on it's own to stand say the words "I object." And you are horrified.

"What?" you gasp. How could- no, how dare he show up only to ruin everything! To ruin everything again! Your eyes lock and you are transported back to a memory that you aren't sure Hasan even remembers. (He does.)

"I'd never let you marry some douchebag," he says, tilting his water bottle back for another swig while you're talking on his stream. Neither of you pay attention to chat while you are tapping back through the video.

"Good thing I'm not planning on getting married, marriage is a scam," you keep the video paused and sit back in your spot. "Because what do you really get out of marriage? You can just get your last name changed to someone else's if you want, it just costs money instead of being 'free'. Disability benefits if you're in America get yeeted into the trash can, not that I'm on disability but the point stands." Hasan nodded along listening to you speak.

"I feel like if you get married to someone and things change, it probably wasn't a good relationship in the first place."

"Yes!" You say clapping to accentuate the word, "yes if you need to get married to continue on the relationship? Don't do it. It's a mistake, get out."

"Would you marry me if I asked?" Hasan's voice was genuine and your eyes flicked to the audio levels to see that his voice indeed going through his stream still. It was hard not to stammer and take the question into serious consideration with your eyes focusing on the very quick stream of people screaming in chat. "You're gonna leave me on read in person?"

"No! No, I. Oh my god-"

"You wouldn't marry me? Wow chat, can you believe it? I give my girlfriend a loving spot next to me for a stream and she says no in front of 10 thousand people." The smile on his face was huge, clearly enjoying that you were covering your face in embarrassment.

You hear him say it out loud, "I would never let you marry some douchebag," loud enough that you can see your mother gasp and cover her mouth in response. You cannot move - can't imagine that this is actually happening. Your betrothed looks at you with aggravation and a hint of suspicion. Before you can speak and defend yourself, they cut you off.

"What is he doing? I told you not to invite him, I knew this would happen," your betrothed is much louder than you assume they intended. Their hands come up and they wave them in front of themselves taking a step back and away from you. "For someone who has 'no feelings' for you, he sure is ruining our life right now." You tear your eyes away from them and towards Hasan, who only speaks when you're looking at him.

"You can't marry him," he moves towards the aisle and your to be marches down to meet him but Hasan has strength on him. "You've been uncertain for months, you can't do this to yourself."

"I-I," your voice comes out as a whisper with tears running down your cheeks, the officiant putting a hand gently on your shoulder. Both sides of the families start to try to break up the stalemate that stands with the distance that feels like forever between you and he. You're frantically looking at the people who don't know who to turn to and your father comes to your rescue, stepping up to the two of them, while you pick up your dress with the help of your maid of honor and walk past everything. You can't do this. Not now.

"Not now", you remember saying, standing in front of Hasan on your doorstep. You're still holding hands even if you've just broken up, staring down through tears at the connection of your fingers. "I don't understand."

"I promise it's not you, it's me," he says, smoothing his thumbs over your knuckles. He hasn't looked you in the eyes once since the conversation started, couldn't stand the idea of seeing you cry. "There's just a lot going on right now and trying to commit to someone isn't fair."

"When have-" a deep, shuddering breath, "when have I ever pressured you for more time together? Was I not asking for enough time? Did I... when did being committed to me become such a chore?" You took your hands from him and wiped away at your eyes. The places he touched stung like bees and you took a step back towards your door. "Go - just go, I don't want to be around you right now."

Before he could say anything, you disappeared beyond the barrier of your home, a place he was no longer welcome and wouldn't step inside of for 2 years.

The next few hours were a whirlwind of people getting kicked out of the wedding, your maid of honor trying to salvage whatever she could while you sobbed in the room where a few hours prior you had your makeup done. Two little words, two, and the last three years of your life could collapse like a poorly constructed bridge. You could hear your betrothed yelling and being escorted out by (you assumed) one of your larger cousins and your father.

"Hey honey," your mothers voice carried across the room quietly as she entered, closing the door behind her. She crossed the distance and wrapped you up in her arms as you started to sob again, unable to hear what she was saying as she consoled you from how loud everything else was.

More time passed and eventually you had amassed the important people in your life in the room with you. Your parents, your maid of honor, and a few of of your friends. Your betrotheds family left along with him sans a handful who felt like he was the one being a jackass. Nobody would quite call you calmed down, but you were able to speak through it now, apologizing that this had all been a waste of time. That inviting your ex to your wedding was a bad idea, but you really did feel blindsided by his outburst.

The exhaustion in your bones by the end of the day would have been enough to paralyze a horse. An uncomfortable silence, only disturbed by the phone buzzing occasionally on the bed next to you. You couldn't bring yourself to silence it entirely, convinced that it was keeping you tethered to reality.

11:19 PM

Love of my Life - 17 Missed Calls

Love of my Life - 24 unread messages

Hasanabi - 2 Missed Calls

Hasanabi - 1 unread message

... bzzzt ...

Hasanabi - 2 unread messages

Love of my Life - 18 missed calls

Another time, another day, another life. You'd give up anything to do over today, without the interruption, without letting the next few years of life plans collapse on the whim of someone who dumped you in the first place. Someone who had now broken your heart not once but twice. Twice!

A pathetic choked laugh left your throat before you rolled over, away from sight of the phone and waited for sleep to grace you with it's presence. If anyone asked you to estimate how quickly you fell asleep, you would tell them you didn't. You don't remember ever closing your eyes long enough for time to pass. Restless. Brokenhearted.

A few weeks down the road and you were at what was was supposed to be day one of your honeymoon. Instead of boarding a plane, you were making a call to Will Neff to ask him to tell Hasan to stop contacting you. He even tries to apologize for him.

"I know he fucked up but I really don't think that he..." he trailed off and you didn't have the energy to cut him off. He wants to tell you that Hasan was just doing what he thought was best, he really didn't want you to marry someone who he thought was not good enough for you. "I really don't think that he even meant to do that. I know he's talked about it before but, you always kind of think and hope that it's a joke." He tries for a laugh but it falls flat out of his mouth before he sighs. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay Will."

"You can always call me if you need me."

"I know."

"I know he loves you!" Will yelled, gesturing towards the sky. You didn't know it at the time, but Will knew that Hasan had bought you a ring two weeks before breaking up with you. "He loves you because he never shuts up about you, he didn't tell me that he was thinking about any of this at all. It doesn't make any sense." It made you feel better to know that Will was on your side, but if he wasn't talking to him about it, was he talking to anyone?

"I hate him," you say before downing the liquor in your glass and sinking further into your seat. "I never wanna see him again, okay? Gonna delete his number from my phone. Teach him to... teach him to drop the best thing that ever happened to him!"

"Yeah!" Will yelled and slapped his hand against the couch. As supportive as ever, even if his best friend was an absolute dickhead.

"I know he loves you still," Will said after a long slow minute of silence. "I think after all this time he does, in his fucked up Hasan way. I'm not saying you give him another chance-"

"Oh thank you for clarifying, I was almost certain you were going to tell me to get with the man who destroyed the marriage that didn't even have a chance to start."

"I'm JUST saying... feelings make people fuuuuucking dumb." That got the softest chuckle out of you and you weren't sure if Will heard you, but he continued. "It's not an excuse, but at least it can be closure for you. Maybe. Just know he's as stupid as he's always been."

[miss0atae]

Random thoughts about Dead Friend Forever ep 7:

I never thought I would find this series so compelling but the more we dive into the past, the more I found it disturbing. One thing is certain... no one is innocent!

▪️ The group of friends is still shitty as ever. They are still mistreating Non and the abuse is getting worse now that he escaped prison. They still need him and use him. I wish I knew why doing this short movie with them is so vital for Non, because nothing really is worth staying with them. I understand he was involved in the making of it and wants to see the end, but frankly they are doing everything to drive him away and he still comes back. Leave! Find another group of cinema enthusiasts and create another movie. His life is already a horror movie, why do you want to make one? I wish I could get into the world of this series to slap the face of everyone in this group. They make me so angry.

▪️ Tee is still a bad guy who never learn. He disgust me. Top never change too. He is still so freaking annoying. I can't stand his face. Fluke is a coward who hide behind his friends but he thinks the same as them. Por is an infuriating a******. He is whining all the time. It's is unbearable. He also has an ego the size of the Everest. They are as bad as each other.

▪️ Let's not talk about Jin.... I knew he wasn't that great too. I always felt it. I mean, how can you be part of the good guy when you hang around the likes of Por or Top (just to name a few)? Of course, he was having a crush on Non. Everyone could see it! However, what he did was so bad. It could be considered as revenge p*** even if they never were lovers at one point. I can understand him being sad or angry, but sending it online just because he was having an unrequited crush, it was so disappointing. Jin is as bad as the rest of the group and even thought I knew it deep down, I was still let down. I wanted the series to show me I was wrong.

▪️ In the same category, I can also say things about the teacher. He was always very touchy with Non. Everyone seems to either want to abused him or date him, there is no in between. The teacher wanted him and got him. Non told him the truth about what was going with him and the teacher said he would help him... but it wasn't for free of just because he had a kind heart. It was hard to watch. I felt Non was forced to do it, but at the same time when Phee asked him, he lied about it. Why?! Did he feel pressure by Phee too, in some way? In addition, I believe the teacher is not was he seems to be. Is he an undercover cops working on the scam accounts? I feel like I lost it a bit at one point because I was too focus on what was going on with Non.

▪️ There is also Phee... I really like the first part of this episode when we saw him having a cute relationship with Non. He really seemed to love Non. He asked him to be his boyfriend but Non never said yes. Phee helped Non when he was arrested and he wanted the best for him. However, in the end, Non lied to him several times and betrayed Phee's trust. I believe they were good for each other. Ta Nannakun has an amazing chemistry with Barcode. He has spellbinding eyes. I just need to add that here. After seeing the video Jin sent online, he rejected Non's love and I believe it's the starting point of everything.

▪️ Let's face it... Non is being driven mad by everything happening to him. I don't even know if there is an exit for him. We are watching him slowly losing any hope. I don't feel any fear for the group of friends. I want them to suffer because they are terrible people, but since Non is being missing in the present, I guess nothing really happened to them in the past. They will just drive him further into madness. Especially now that Jin is angry at him and won't even try to help him.

▪️ I hope Phee became friend with them to make them pay and suffer. I just want to know if he really has feeling for Jin, in the present. Is Tan and White also helping him in his revenge quest or are they just innocents victims dragged into this mess. I know White is Tee's boyfriend but how did Tan got in their group?

The next episode is still in the past and it should be the last flashback. I really want to know what is going to happen. Dead Friend Forever is more interesting than what it appeared at first.

[silver-tooth-the-panther]

Don’t worry. This is a hurt/comfort one

The Truth Is The

Monster

(A DOAI Fanfic!)

Warnings: Hurt/comfort…A lot of it.

Word Count: 1983

Going back to work felt like going to a chamber of death. Alex felt nothing but anxiety and dread as they headed to the cage. Knowing what the future might bring caused them to have a mini heart attack whenever they were called by another staff member.

What made it especially worse was not only the fact that they had to place the USB back, but they also had to meet with The Eastridge Demon. Lately, all they’ve felt was stress and anxiety. It seems like the last time they felt stress free was before that frightful Halloween.

However, they knew that this mission was much bigger than a simple scam. This would dictate the fate of an entire species and they knew they needed to free the people in the lab. All of this severely hurt their head and clogged their vision.

But they weren’t alone in this. Not only did The Hijacker have their back, but Alex also had Spec, a friend for life. Reminding themselves of their buddy, Alex was able to continue work as normal.

In the morning, Alex quickly took the USB back to the lab. Luckily, they had no interruptions this time. They wished they could’ve talked to Mortimer though. They wanted to assure them that they were going to get rescued, but Alex couldn’t risk getting caught. So, they decided to leave something for them.

A small, folded up piece of paper slipped underneath the bars of their cage. Mortimer shook when they heard the rustling, believing it was another caretaker. When they saw the paper though, Mortimer quickly snatched it and unfolded it. Then, they quickly read it.

“Mortimer, I’m so sorry that they turned you into this. I never would’ve thought this would happen to you and I should’ve never gotten you involved in this. I understand if you’re not able to forgive me, but please know that we’re going to rescue you. Please be patient and stay hopeful. - Alex.”

Mortimer hugged the letter close to their chest, tears slowly falling down their face. “Thank you…Thank you, Alex.” They tucked the left into their pocket and crawled into their cot.

After they got off of work, Alex knew where they needed to go next. They didn’t go far in their car since they knew that Clyde wouldn’t be too far away from the foundation. So, Alex decided to park where they did when they first met Clyde.

Plants and sticks brushed up against Alex’s skin as they walked into the woods. “Clyde?” They called out in a hushed voice. “Clyde?” Alex sighed and took out a plastic baggie. “I hope Spec was right about this.” They then unzipped the bag and pulled out a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

A few seconds passed with no sign of The Smiling Snatcher. Then, Alex started to hear strange rustling all around them. “Audio hallucinations.” Alex said to themselves. “I know you’re there, Clyde!” Before they could do anything else, Clyde snatched the sandwich, without touching Alex, with their jaws. Alex yelped and stumbled backwards from the Veldigun, making it chuckle.

“What? Ain’t used to monsters like me?” Clyde said through a mouth of food. “No, you just surprised me. Like you did last time.” Alex huffed while crossing their arms. Clyde rolled their eyes, chomping down on the sandwich. “So, why did you come to find me?” They said as they finished their food.

“Well, The Hijacker wants you to join us when we raid the foundation. We want your help.” Alex spoke sternly. Clyde tiled their head as they stepped closer. “They are finally ready…guess they really needed an insider’s help.” Clyde slowly laughed, making an eerie sound. “But I know that you don’t like me…”

“That’s because of how you treat Spec.” Alex remarked, huffing with repressed anger. “This is not your business, human.” Clyde snapped their jaws. “You don’t understand…” Alex furrowed their eyebrows. “Understand what? They’ve told me quite a lot, so I definitely understand.”

Clyde growled, tail flicking rapidly. “They don’t understand either. They don’t know anything!” Alex bared their teeth. “That’s because you kept them in the dark! You made them feel worthless! You made them feel like they don’t belong!” Clyde jumped to Alex, landing right in front of them. “You have no idea what I’ve done for them! You have no idea what I’ve had to sacrifice for them! I’ve lost myself for them! I’ve…I’ve lost…them.” Clyde’s voice turned soft and sorrowful in their last sentence. Then, the duo heard something.

“Clyde?” A soft voice called out from the bushes. Spec’s yellow eyes glowed in the dark as they stepped closer. “Clyde? Alex?” The small Veldigun tilted their head, their eyes filled with confusion…and hurt. “Spec? What are you doing here?” Alex asked, terrified that they might now know the truth.

“You weren’t back from work yet, so I thought I should go look for you in case you needed help.” Spec winced, looking between the two of them. “But I see that you have found my brother.” They shook, seemingly trying to understand what’s going on. “Why…Why didn’t you tell me?”

Before Alex could answer, Clyde stepped in front of them and growled. “Because you are a weak Veldigun. You are useless and not a worthy member of the species!” These words dug into Spec as they curled their tail around their body. “Clyde…I’m sorry…I-I just wanted to find you…”

“You should’ve stayed away…” Clyde hissed, slamming their claws against a tree. “You don’t understand. You will never understand because you’re nothing like us. You spend your time making ridiculous stories and playing games…instead of-“

“Instead of hurting others?” Alex growled, trying to cease Clyde’s mental attack. Spec’s eyes widened when they heard this. “You…you hurt others?” Clyde backed away, raising their clawed hands. “It’s…It’s not what you think…I-I…could not fight this war without them.” Realizing what they just said, Clyde covered their mouth, but it was too late.

Tears filled Spec’s eyes as they slowly backed away. “How…how could you? Why…Why…I don’t understand.” Clyde tried to reach out a hand towards them, but Spec smacked their hand away. “Stay away from me, you monster!” Spec cried out before turning around and running away, sobbing all the way.

“Spec! Please!” Clyde roared, stomping their feet. Alex could feel their heart ache as they saw their partner being crushed. “Why do you have to be such an asshole to them?! Why did you kill those children that Halloween night?!” Clyde sighed, exhausted. “You don’t understand.” They said weakly.

“You’re right! I don’t! I don’t understand why someone would be so cruel!” Alex roared with pure rage. “BECAUSE I NEED TO MAKE SURE THAT THEY’RE SAFE!” Clyde whirled around, hot tears streaming down their face. “They need to hate me…so they would stay away from this place. If they don’t, they will follow me until they die.”

Clyde laid their back flat against the tree, sliding down to the ground. “Do you think I want to be cruel to them? Do you think I wanted to hurt those children?” Alex’s expression softened as they walked over to Clyde and crouched down in front of them. “Why did you hurt them then?”

“Same reason why you and The Hijacker are determined to break into the asylum.” They sighed. “This war has stripped everything from me. I’ve lost so many friends and family…my best friend is being tortured on a daily basis…I can’t lose Spec too. I want them to have a future, even if I’m not apart of it.”

Alex tilted their head. “What about the children?” Clyde covered half of their face with their hand. “I never wanted to steal their souls. Winfrey will be disappointed when they hear about it. I…I needed the power…I can’t fight all those caretakers with no power.”

Alex sighed. “So, in your mind, you did the wrong thing for the right reasons?” Clyde nods, wiping a tear from their eyes. “I hate myself everyday because of what I’ve done.” Alex then sat down next to them. “It doesn’t have to be like that, Clyde. You just need to talk to them.”

“Alex, you don’t get it. They’re stubborn and they’ll constantly insist that they can help. They have no power and can’t suckle souls, so they’ll get killed.” Alex shook their head slowly. “They may not be as strong as you, but they are more intelligent than you give them credit for. I know that you don’t want them killed, but you’re still hurting them.”

Alex then stood up and dusted themselves off. “Just talk to them, alright? I’m sure they’ll understand.” They took a few steps before Clyde lifted their head from their hands. “I-I’ll join you…I’ll come by tomorrow night.” Alex nodded at the Veldigun before turning and leaving to go to their car.

Alex drove home as quickly as possible. Now, they were extremely anxious and they worried if Spec had been caught. Every light felt like a slap in the face and time wasted. After some time though, they finally arrived home.

The screen door was shut, but the wooden one was not. Alex quickly ran up the stone stairs, praying to themselves that Spec was there. “Spec!” They looked through the bedroom and kitchen frantically. “Spec! Where are you?!” Then, they heard some sniffing in the living room.

‘Trick r Treat’ was playing on the TV and what looked like a bundle of blankets was laying on the couch, but it was actually the small Veldigun. Alex’s heart broke as they walked closer, listening to their cries and sobs. They sat down on the other side of the couch.

Spec was completely covered by the grey blanket they took shelter in. “Spec?” Alex spoke in a soft, gentle voice. The Veldigun peeked out from under the blanket, pain and tears streaming down their face. Alex’s expression softened and patted their lap, calling for the Veldigun.

In a few seconds, Spec shuffled closer to Alex and laid their head on their friend’s lap. Alex sighed as they gently started to pet the Veldigun. They waited a few moments before speaking.

“I know it doesn’t feel like it, but they do love you.” Spec looked up at them as Alex spoke. “They…they just don’t know how to communicate. They just want you to stay safe.” The Veldigun nodded as they rested their head once more. “I know it’s because I’m weak.”

Alex shook their head. “No, you’re not weak.” Spec sniffed softly. “Then why did you go along with their lie? Both Clyde and Lankmann…” Alex sighed, knowing that this was coming. “Because I wanted you to stay safe just as much as everyone else. You’re too sweet and kind to lose.” Spec sat up rather quickly. “So are you! You’re also a human! You shouldn’t have been forced into this.”

“You’re right, Spec, but it’s too late for me. My fate was sealed on Halloween night.” Alex sighed and continued to pet the Veldigun, who laid their head back down on their friend’s lap. “I’m sorry, Spec. I didn’t think it was alright to keep this from you, but I guess I let my heart cloud my better judgment.”

Spec turned their body to look at Alex. “It’s…It’s alright. I understand why you did it. I probably would’ve done the same. Just please…let me help. I want to help you guys. I can tell that this war has been weighing on my brother and Lankmann. So, please…let me help.” Alex softly smiled. “If I can help them, then you can too.”

Spec turned back over to face the TV. Then, they started to purr softly. “That feels nice…” Spec murmured as Alex continued to pet them. Alex chuckled lightly as they did so. “I’m glad. Just try to relax, okay?” Spec nodded, purring loudly, before they quickly fell asleep.

[td-tbbg-official]

Valentine’s Day - Short Story

“That will be $47.06. Will that be cash or card?”

“Oh my God, babe, like in your favorite video game! Isn’t that so cool?”

“You remembered?”

“Of course I did! How could I not?”

“Oh, I just… Thought that… Nevermind, I’m just kinda flattered.”

“And it’s a cute coincidence, isn’t it? You’re buying me gifts that round up to your favorite number—”

“Will that be cash or card?” Heather shouts, loud enough for the most annoying couple she’s seen today to snap out of making heart eyes at each other and look at her.

“Um, card,” the guy reluctantly says as he takes out his wallet.

“Fucking finally,” the cashier mumbles under her breath, thankfully quietly enough for the clients not to hear.

“I take it your day isn’t going well…” the girl chuckles.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Heather snarls.

Fuck this ‘customer service’ smiley face façade, she couldn’t care less. This is her fourth job this year anyways, and it’s only February. Maybe by Women’s Day, she’ll be at her eighth. That’d be a pathetic record, and she can’t believe she actually partly wants to reach it, just to feel something again.

“Oh, nothing, sorry,” the girl chuckles again. “Forget it. Have a lovely day! Happy Valentine’s!”

“Go die in a ditch,” Heather retorts, mostly to her computer, her tone hushed again in order to not get fired.

Stupid couples in this stupid store on this stupid holiday. It’s all a scam anyways. A holiday invented for the sole purpose of making single people feel lonely, aromantic people feel invalid, and benefiting off the money in those in relationships. Who the hell thought of this?

Her day could be much worse, she is well aware. She could be swarmed by TDI superfans looking to get her autograph. She could be swarmed by TDI superfans looking to cause her untimely demise. She doesn’t know which one is worse at this point. Lovey-dovey couples are the last of her worries, but she can’t help but roll her eyes at every single one.

Deep down, she knows why; but she refuses to admit it to herself. She tells herself she’s moved past him, that she’s grown as a person and, in turn, outgrown him.

But if she goes even deeper, she knows it’s not true. As mostly everything Heather Kasuga has told in her life, this, too, is a lie.

***

It’s when he drops his make-up brush for the umpteenth time that Alejandro breaks. Not into tears, no; he actually breaks his bathroom mirror. It’s only then that he bursts into tears, because he’s cut himself on the glass, and doesn’t have enough money to replace his mirror.

It’s not like it matters, anyways. He’s become hideous, and he knows this. He wonders why he even has this mirror in his apartment – it’s not like he still likes looking at himself, as he did many years ago… What has it been, a decade? And does it matter? Time stopped after Total Drama, and its importance faded away with it.

On this day, he tends to think back to that damned show, believe it or not. The bonds he’s made on it never leave his head, and one in particular stands out; it’s the one that haunts him most, the one that he wishes actually lasted.

Of course, it’s impossible. They’ve grown. She’s strong, and she’s surely gotten past him.

But he’s weak, and he hasn’t. And he knows this, but never will he admit it.

For Alejandro Burromuerto refuses to tell another lie. Whatever exists up there knows where that gets him.

***

END STORY

Ah, Valentine’s Day. The perfect day to show your partner just how much you love them by giving into the horrors of capitalism and buying them more chocolate than they could eat in a year! How wonderful.

I... seriously pity you if you were expecting something cutesy, haha! Oh my God, the look on your face must be priceless! Listen, when I said these two were going through it, I meant it!

Hey, if it’s any consolation, Chef and I are doing great. We’re watching the first few seasons back to back while laughing at every single painful moment, reminiscing of the screams we’ve heard while on set and ranking them. If that’s not true love, I don’t know what is...

coming soon to an AO3 near you.

questions, concerns, suggestions to be deposited in the ask box.

TD: TBBG is written by @canonically47. the blog is entirely run by the writer.

!!! reblogs > likes !!!

[schuylerpeck]

if you feel comfortable sharing, were you born into LDS? what made you leave the church?

yes, yes, while I wouldn't say I'm ever excited to talk about it, it's something I feel really strongly about and am planning on writing more about it in the future. (more therapy needed first :) ) this won't be phrased perfectly, but here we go.

yes, I was born into the church. honestly, my story is very long and very complicated, so it's hard to summarize, but I'll try (though, if you have more questions about anything, please feel free to ask):

I never felt like the church was a good fit for me - from a young age, I didn't agree with a lot of the stances in the church (had a lot of friends in the lgbtq community, didn't realize I belonged to that community myself, didn't really want to be a mother, felt like women had no power in the church, felt constantly monitored, felt like I was years behind my peers not only in rites of passage but also general knowledge. there was so much I truly didn't know.)

the church absorbs any identity (I've been out of the church for years and am still working on building a sense of self and trusting that I can make my own decisions. adults are infantilized so that they're dependent on the leaders/their husbands/that community)

because of abstinence-only education, a lot of locked-door conversations, the massive push for marriage while you're young, and the general workings of the church, I believe it fosters incredibly dangerous situations. (I'll write more on this, but during my youth, I was never told to vet suitors or what to watch out for in terms of dangerous dating or people that wanted to do me harm. young women especially are made to believe they're lucky for any man to want to pursue them. children aren't raised to understand their bodies and have a lot of guilt and shame instilled in them. no one I was raised with was ever told what consent was. etc, etc.)

this all affected my life in ways I wish I could change (I was forced to go to a college I didn't like, I had a lot of unhealthy behaviors born from shame/fear from the church, I ended up marrying someone harmful, and am, to this day, still unlearning/dealing with all of those repercussions.)

the temple - I was told my entire life that the secret temple ceremonies (for endowments and marriage) were the most beautiful, meaningful experiences I could enjoy in life, and when I finally made it there, all I found were uncomfortable, shallow, misogynistic, and creepy rituals, clearly lifted from masonic ceremonies, that felt deeply cult-y.

all of my personal experience aside, outside of the societal aspects of mormonism, and its devious present-day business/political power, what my decision came down to was discovering the truth of its origins. members are lied to about church history, and/or are fed a more digestible version of events. thanks to the internet and the ability to fact-check, I was able to learn the other side to stories I've been retold all my life. the most blaring fact being that Joseph Smith, the founder of the church, was a con man who had a documented history of scamming people. the book he wrote was historically inaccurate, and from a scientific standpoint, those stories in no way could have taken place. coming to terms with this was just the same as understanding Santa doesn't exist—once you've discovered it, reality makes a lot more sense and there's no going back to it. again, happy to go into anything else, but whewww, I've got a lot to say about it.

[rallsia-arnoldii]

CW: p-dophilia, harassment

Just saying right now, MrDrnose doesn't have to listen to Kaiden/the professor from msa/some ordinary protogen. Do y'all see the effects of the "stick joke" claim Kaiden made? TL;DR:

MrDrnose/Eternitydev somewhere between 2018-2020 made a joke about the main character from Advanced Education with Viktor Strobovski licking a sex toy. On April 4th 2021 MrDrnose made it official that Angell was 18 but there's no valid evidence about what her age was before that. MrDrnose claims that they (Angell and Olivia) were always 18.

MrDrnose was also born in 2002 making him 16-18 when he made the joke and 19 when he stated that Angell was 18. More evidence is on the other post I made about this.

This isn't about the stick though, it's about the effects that Kaiden's document had by making that situation out to be WAY worse than it actually is. This has led to people believing that MrDrnose is a p-dophile and wishing ill on him.

No this is not the entire comment section but I wanted to show you just how bad the hate for him got. I have 56 screenshots of negative comments from the wiki. 47 just from Angell's page alone.

Kaiden caused a sea of hate over nothing, just look his point about "minor hate":

I can't cover the discord server because I haven't been in there and I don't know anyone who has, but most of the stuff outside of there is easily disproved. Eternitydev oversexualizes stuff? Opinion. Plus it's not that obnoxious. Minor hate? Those are jokes, and even if they were hateful Eternitydev's target fanbase isn't minors. Pateron scam? Most of his Pateron are from VOTV and didn't pay for AEwVS, he could just be taking his time, and worst comes to worst you can just get a refund. MrDrnose made gross stuff of minors? Read above, I'm not explaining this a third time.

Basically, if most (if not all) I can get full information about can be disproved, then the stuff in the discord is likely stretched or had important information cut out. Even if a lot the stuff here is right, we need to hear it from people other than Kaiden because Kaiden is unreliable as a sole source.

Kaiden has quite a bit on how Eternitydev has been avoiding him and shutting posts about the document down, but if you saw some random teenager acting like the "minor hate" jokes, something stupid you wrote when you were 16, added their own opinions in the same document that's supposed to be calling out p-dophiles and acted like that was a good criticism, you would not listen to them either. There's also probably a lot of other stuff MrDrnose knows that I don't, which only just reinforces my point.

[digital-corruption]

Send in the Clowns

⚠ Trigger warning: Not suitable for people with coulrophobia (fear of clowns)

"Everyone's here?" MC asked as she walked into the small meeting room of the Mystery Investigators, Inc. office in Colville.

In the middle of the room sat a second-hand, oval wooden table with mismatching wooden chairs around it. Jake sat at the far end working at his laptop, ignoring Jessy and Cleo who had been gossiping all the latest happenings in Duskwood. Dan sat at the other end opposite Jake. While he seemed to be in quiet contemplation, the truth was he was still a bit hungover from the night before from one too many drinks at the Aurora.

"Well, everyone that was available," Jessy corrected. "Thomas and Hannah are still on their road trip and Lilly got stuck doing double shifts. She says, 'Hello', and wishes she could join us."

"Ah well, we'll take what we can get," MC shrugged and put a couple of large paper shopping bags down in the middle of the table.

"Hey, you've got me. What more do you need?" Dan boasted. "Honestly you could just send the rest of them home."

"Oh so you know how to bypass biometric locks?" Jake mocked.

"I am sure I can work it out. I graduated from the MacGyver School of Resourcefulness," Dan joked. "Just need some tape and some powder and boom! Instant fingerprint!"

"That might work on locks from the 80s, but this is the 21st century," Jake rolled his eyes. "And what would you do if it had an eye scanner?"

"The ol' knock-out-a-guard-and-hold-his-eye-open-in-front-of-the-scanner trick, duh!" Dan beamed.

"Wait, we're knocking out guards?" Cleo questioned.

"No, we are not!" MC exclaimed. "This is a nonviolent operation!"

"Ugh, fine," Dan leaned back in his seat with disappointment. "I suppose Jake can come then."

Cleo sighed with relief, "Ok, good. You know I don't mind a little B & E, but I have my limits."

"Well if everything goes according to my plan, you won't have to worry about the guards at all," MC began. "Our target is Jorge Santos. You may have seen his name on the signs around the city. He's a real estate agent here and we believe he's been scamming some of his clients, but the only way we can prove that is with access to his home computer."

"Is this legal?" Cleo questioned.

"Cleo, the man is an asshole," Dan pointed out.

"Yes, but if they steal information and give it to the police, it can't be used against him, right?" Cleo asked.

"If our goal was to get him arrested, sure. There are other ways to ruin him though," Jake interrupted.

"Our client knows proving a crime actually happened will be difficult with the way these scams are done. However, leaking the right information will heavily damage his image and his name, especially with high profile clients. The goal is to get the truth out in the open," MC explained.

"Ok, let's do it," Dan nodded. "What’s the plan?"

"Well, getting into Santos' house- mansion really, won't be easy. Due to his connections with the mob, his place is guarded. However, it also turns out Santos has an 8 year-old son who turns 9 on Monday. And Santos is going all out on his birthday party. His son wants a circus and has requested clowns," MC smiled with confidence.

"Wait, you mean…" Cleo trailed off, looking around the room.

"Jake as a clown!?" Dan burst out laughing. "This is the best news I've heard all year!"

"You too, numbskull," Jake glared from his laptop.

"Huh, what?" Dan's face twisted.

"Yes, I've ordered five costumes," MC motioned to the bags on the table.

"I think it will be fun," Jessy grinned.

"I don't know the first thing about being a clown," Cleo grimaced. "I could bake the pies though."

"Ah, just make it up as you go!" Jessy encouraged. "That's the great thing about clowns, right? Do whatever feels fun and silly!"

"I think it involves a lot more than that," Cleo frowned.

"Yeah, like a sense of humour," Dan mocked, earning him three eye rolls and a kick to his shin.

"Anyway, how do you propose to sneak around as clowns?" Cleo inquired. "I can't imagine clown costumes will provide much stealth."

"Not with squeaky shoes," Jessy humoured.

"But you need squeaky shoes if you're trying to appear authentic," Dan pointed out, already completely on board. "And a big, red noggin' for him."

Jake narrowed his eyes, "You’re enjoying this way too much."

"Oh, I'll be taking photos. Never know when I might need some quality blackmail material," Dan joked.

"Just remember I will have equally as much blackmail on you, if not more," Jake glared.

"Why would you have more?" Dan raised his eyebrow confused.

"Well, while you three are performing on stage, Jake and I will be breaking into the target's home office," MC shrugged.

"Excuse me!?" Cleo said abruptly. "While we're what!?"

"It'll be fine," Jessy insisted. "We'll spray water at each other and throw pies. The kids will love it."

"I also rented one of those tiny cars. Make Dan go into it and drive around all scrunched up. The kids will love it," MC assured them.

"I am pretty sure I had a nightmare once about this," Cleo sighed. "Ah screw it. It's just for a little while."

"So you’re in?" MC questioned.

"Yes, I'm in," Cleo waved her hand. "But I'm in charge of baking the pies. If I am going to have a pie smushed in my face, it must at least taste halfway decent!"

MC glanced at Jessy, her secretary. "Oh of course you know I'm in, boss," she giggled.

MC looked over to Dan, "Seeing Jake with a rainbow wig, ugly ass clothes and oversized red shoes is more than enough payment for me."

"You too, Dan," Jake reminded him. "You’re going to be wearing the same damn thing!"

"Yes, but you're going to be dressed as a clown," Dan reiterated. "And that will never get old."

"Ok, it's currently 10 o'clock. The party starts at 4. Let's get to it!" MC declared.

"Ah! I need to buy ingredients! Tell me you have pie pans!" Cleo jumped out of her chair.

"This is a private investigator's office. Why on earth would we have pie pans?" Jake pointed out.

"You at least have an oven?" Cleo frowned.

"A microwave oven?" MC shrugged.

"It’s ok, we can use my apartment," Jessy interrupted. "I have everything there."

"So I guess I'll just sit here and take a nap for the next five and a half hours?" Dan leaned back and stretched out his legs.

"Oh, no, you’re coming with us!" Cleo objected. "We can practise between batches."

MC nodded, "I'll go over the plans again. Jake you… you do Jake things."

Jake smiled, "I'll check all the programs."

"Great, let's reconvene here in four hours for costume changes, hair and makeup," MC announced.

"What? How long does is it take you to paint your faces white?" Dan asked astonished.

"It could take us that long just to get your feet into the big shoes," Jessy joked.

Six hours later, the Mystery Investigators, Inc. van rolled up to the security gate in front of the Santos mansion. Its occupants were in full costume and face paint. Their fake flowers pinned to their chest were full of water, ready to spray. Their pies were fresh and ready to be thrown. Dan sat in the back, practising his juggling every time the van stopped. Jake worked on his laptop doing Jake things. The three girls sat in the front with MC driving. A clown car had been loaded into the back, making the van heavier than usual.

"Company name?" The security guard asked, peering through the driver side window.

"Funky Feet. We're one of the hired acts for the party today," MC responded casually.

The guard checked his clipboard to confirm, "Ok, drive up and park on the left side by the servant's entrance."

"Servant's entrance?" Cleo questioned under her breath. "This guy makes that much money off real estate?"

MC nodded and closed the window as the gate opened, then drove up the driveway cautiously.

"You do when you're selling entire city blocks," Jessy pointed out.

"And work for the mob. Don't forget that mob part! No one makes that much money legally anymore," Dan spoke up.

"Now, now, it's time to get into character," said MC as she parked beside a catering van. "We're happy, jovial clowns, remember?"

"Yeah, happy, remember?" Dan nudged Jake with one of his bowling pins. "No sad clowns here."

Under his white face paint, thick red painted lips, blue stars over his eyes, bright green wig and big red nose, Jake glared at Dan. He reached his hand up and squeaked his nose.

"I can be happy," he said flatly.

"Could you at least say that with a smile?" Dan burst out laughing.

Jake faked a smile, but somehow it was even creepier.

"Stop! Stop! You're making it worse! Sweet Jesus, don't give this man any red balloons!" Dan cried out. "Every child is going to have nightmares tonight, I guarantee it!"

"Would you two stop?" MC frowned. "Come on, unload the little car."

Dan bounced up to his feet with two squeaks of his oversized red shoes as Jessy and Cleo went round the back to open the rear van doors. Jake begrudgingly shoved his laptop away in his backpack before getting up to help push the clown car out of the van. Once the car was out, Jake pulled MC aside.

"I'm not scary, am I?" he pouted.

"Aw, hey, don't listen to him. I mean look at Dan. Who are the kids going to be more frightened of? A little ol' sad clown or McBeefy, the body builder clown?" MC joked.

"His muscles do look ridiculous in those bright yellow clothes and those stupid looking suspenders," Jake conceded.

MC leant up and gave his nose a quick peck, not wanting to ruin her own makeup, "Hey, no sad clowns allowed here today, ok?" She moved around to rejoin the group, fighting the urge to laugh at the sight of Dan climbing into the tiny clown car. "Alright team! It's time for operation 'Send in the Clowns!'"

"No pun intended," Jessy giggled.

MC shook her head in amusement, then turned to lead the way around the side of the house to the backyard. The others followed her on either side with Dan in the clown car, Jessy and Cleo carrying boxes full of neatly stacked pies, and Jake working on his happy clown expression, which only got them startled looks from the other hired staff that they passed. Still, it was a power walk like none other seen before, with their oversized red shoes that squeaked out of sync with each other and their bright coloured wigs.

The event organiser approached MC and asked, "Ok, what act are you with?"

MC looked at her clown costume and at the others before turning back to the organiser, "We're the clowns."

The organiser rolled his eyes, "I can see that, but there are multiple clown groups." He gestured to the stage where another troupe was performing.

"We have competition!?" Dan exclaimed. "Oh it is on!"

"Dan! This is not a circus talent show! It's a kids party!" Cleo hushed him.

"Are you going to be satisfied with being second best?" Dan pointed out.

Cleo was quiet for a moment before responding, "I bet their pies taste like trash."

"Their clothes are too coordinated and don't even clash with their hair," Jessy winced.

"They don't have a clown car," Jake pointed out.

"Ha! Even hac-" Dan caught himself before he slipped. "Harlequin boy is getting into it!"

Jake glared at Dan, knowing full well what Dan nearly yelled for everyone to hear.

"Could you do something about that one?" The organiser gestured to Jake. "He's going to give kids nightmares if he keeps that up."

MC smiled while fighting back laughing, "I assure you once he gets into character, he's all smiles. He's just having a bad day because someone hit his cat this morning."

"Oh! I am sorry to hear that. Well, you can warm up over by the hors d'oeuvres table," the organiser motioned.

The group moved over to the buffet table and set down the boxes while Dan parked the car and climbed out. As he was stretching out, the performers on stage finished and swarms of children got up and flooded the area, catching the group by surprise. Dan quickly started to juggle his bowling pins in an attempt to entertain the children.

“You suck!” one of the children yelled suddenly, causing Dan to miss one of the pins. The children all burst out laughing from the comical squeak as it landed on his shoe, followed by the comical pained squeak from Dan’s mouth.

Dan grumbled under his breath, “You little twerp!” But then another child jumped on his oversized shoe to make it squeak again and landed on his toes in the process. A series of comical squeaks streamed from Dan’s mouth.

Meanwhile Jessy pulled out a long balloon from her pocket and blew it up to twist into a balloon animal, “Who would like a dog balloon?”

“I want an elephant!” one of the kids called out.

“Well, I don’t do elephants. I do dogs,” Jessy frowned. “Tell you what, I can make you a giraffe!”

“No, an elephant!” the kid reiterated.

Jessy was so stressed that she ended up popping the balloon anyway. The kids all laughed while she quickly tried to blow up another balloon, but one of the naughty kids poked the balloon with a pin and caused it to pop in her face.

Cleo would’ve come to Jessy’s aid, but she was busy trying to keep the children away from her carefully baked pies, “No touchies!”

Jake on the other hand was slowly walking backwards, trying to get as far away from the mob as possible. However some of the children spotted him and started poking at him.

“What’s in the backpack?” one asked.

“Hey, can you do any tricks?” another pestered.

“Why aren’t you smiling?” another pressured. “Clowns are supposed to be happy!”

“You are a terrible clown!” one called out.

“Ah, he’s so creepy!” another cried.

MC panicked, not sure who to help first. She hadn’t imagined there would be so many children. It felt like the entire school had been invited to the party, or at least the entire grade.

The previous performers walked past sneering at them, “What a bunch of amateurs!”

Just then, MC spotted one of the toddler’s tricycles and grabbed it. She sat down and started awkwardly riding around the group. Jessy saw her and joined MC on a tricycle as well, trundling along beside her. The kids pointed and started giggling at how ridiculous they looked. Dan walked in front of them and jokingly tried to stop them using pantomime, but the girls ran into him and they all fell over. Cleo shook her head, then grabbed two pies and dumped them on the heads of the two female pranksters. A couple of the kids ran over and jumped on top of Dan, but he lifted them up with his monstrous strength and stood up, then pretended to weight lift while the kids held onto his arms. A couple more children jumped on and tried to weigh Dan down, but he couldn’t be stopped.

Amidst all of the chaos, Jake watched by the sidelines confused as to what to do. A young girl grabbed his hand, catching him by surprise.

“It’s ok to be sad,” she looked up at Jake with sympathy.

Jake was speechless, but then he remembered he had a few paper flowers in his coat pocket. He had intended to give them to MC, but he decided it wouldn’t hurt to give one to away. He took it out and offered it to the little girl with a soft smile. As soon as she saw the flower she eagerly took it from him and ran off to show her mother. The speed that she ran off bewildered Jake, but he caught MC watching him with a smirk on her face. Not understanding why MC would look at him like that, he looked away and blushed, hoping the white paint would cover the redness in his face.

While MC was distracted, Cleo and Jessy started play bickering amongst themselves and threw pieces of pie back and forth between them. Some of the kids got involved and started to take sides. They grabbed the expensive hors d’oeuvres as ammunition and soon an all out food fight broke out. MC took the opportunity to sneak out and grab Jake’s hand. While security desperately tried to get the fight under control, they ran off towards the house.

“I started to worry we wouldn’t get away,” Jake commented as he plugged a handheld device into the security pad and unlocked it with brute force.

“Ah, creating chaos is what we do best,” MC smirked, while watching for guards.

“Ok, door’s open. Let’s go,” Jake announced as he opened the door for MC.

MC ran in first. As she spent the afternoon studying the house’s floorplan, she knew exactly where the office was. What she hadn’t expected to find was a guard exiting the bathroom as they came around the corner. They caught him still in the middle of zipping up his pants. Before he could pull out his sidearm, Jake stepped in front and squirted the liquid from his fake flower on his chest into the guard’s face. The guard stepped back stunned, then collapsed unconscious on the ground.

“What the hell was that?” MC exclaimed.

Jake shrugged as he stepped over the unconscious guard, “I figured swapping the water out would come in handy.”

“You did what!?” she glared. “What if one of the kids go their hands on it!?”

“You can discipline me later. Help me pick him up,” he leant down and lifted the guard by his armpits.

MC facepalmed herself in her head while she bent over and picked up the guard’s ankles. Quickly they shuffled him over to a closet and dropped him on the floor. After checking the hallway was clear, they made a mad dash for the office. As they expected. the office door had a digital lock as well, except this one had a fingerprint scanner. Jake pried open the panel and plugged in his device directly into the board, but it was taking a lot longer to break into.

“Dan’s method would’ve been faster,” MC teased.

“No, it would not,” Jake rolled his eyes. “We’d have to find the right fingerprints first and with so many people in the house, there’s no way of knowing whose print is whose. It’s almost done. Give it a bit more time.”

After another minute, the device finally beeped with success. The door clicked open, and MC dashed inside the office. Jake snapped the panel closed again and shut the door behind him.

“Check his bookcase while I install the virus on his computer,” Jake motioned to the bookcase on the side of the room as he marched over to the desk.

“Pfft, I give the orders around here,” MC frowned.

Jake glanced up and raised his eyebrow, “Would you like to break into his computer instead?”

“No, I’m good,” she turned away and started shuffling through the unmarked folders in the bookcase.

Jake shook his head and plopped down in the leather chair. Swiftly he pulled out his laptop and plugged it into the back of the all-in-one computer monitor. As soon as he unlocked his laptop, he started running his program to bypass the PIN login on Santos’ computer.

“There’s nothing here,” MC sighed and stepped away from the bookcase, then glanced over at the very serious clown sitting at the computer typing away like it was life or death. She pursed her lips in an attempt to keep a straight face, but as Jake looked up and noticed her watching, she burst out laughing anyway. “I’m sorry, you just look so ridiculous sitting there looking like that.”

Jake reached up and squeezed his red nose, “The things I do for you.” He couldn’t help but smile as he returned to his work.

MC giggled then noticed in the window behind Jake that Dan, Cleo and Jessy were being chastised by the event organiser. He was absolutely furious, but then one of the children threw a pie at him. While he was distracted, the others ran off with the kids helping their escape. MC then noticed the guard they had knocked out stumbling into the yard gesturing and shouting about a surprise clown attack.

“Oh shit! Jake! We’ve gotta go!” MC gasped.

Jake glanced over his shoulder at the chaos ensuing outside. Not wanting to leave the clown car behind, Dan jumped in and started to drive off just fast enough to keep ahead of security. Jessy and Cleo jumped onto the sides of the car and held for dear life. Jake snapped back around and quickly unplugged his laptop, shoving it back into his backpack.

“The installation is finished. Let’s get out of here before the cops arrive!” Jake said in a hurry.

The two ran for the door so fast their wigs fell off. MC nearly tripped over her shoes as they entered the hallway so she ripped them off and Jake followed suit. Running in their rainbow-coloured socks, they bumped into maids and cooks as they made their way for the servant’s entrance. At some point they lost their red noses, but they couldn’t remember when. As they exited the building, Dan was driving the clown car into the van with Jessy and Cleo still on holding on. MC ran for the driver’s side door while Jake went for the passenger side. They jumped in just as the girls closed the backdoors tight. MC swiftly turned the van on and put it into the reverse gear. She went backwards so quickly, she nearly hit some of the security guards, but sped forwards before they could recover. Luckily the security gate was already open to let a catering van through when MC pushed through in front of them and made it back out onto the open road. In the distance they could hear approaching sirens, but she quickly regained her cool and dropped back down to the speed limit, hiding amongst the everyday traffic on the road.

“Oh my God!” Cleo cried out from the back. “That was nuts!”

“Did we do it?” Jessy asked. “Please tell me we did it.”

MC glanced over at Jake, who was wiping the makeup off his face with a towel. He nodded to MC in confirmation.

“We did it,” she announced.

Later that night social media erupted when phone camera footage of Dan driving the clown car with Jessy and Cleo hanging on top while being chased by security was posted to Tiktok. Thankfully due to the heavy makeup and costumes, no one could identify them. Within the following days documents were leaked to the internet detailing Jorge Santos’ dirty techniques and scams to drive property prices up and down as he saw fit, but unsurprisingly no one managed to connect the two events together. Mystery Investigators, Inc. were successful once again.

[mariejordans]

I agree Jordan Marie and cate are the best most interesting characters if they're going to kill someone it should be Andre like you said he's useless and also unlikable as a person lmfao he ain't doing anything right. I love cate and I love villains so whatever way they go with her as long as it's believable I'm all for it. My thing with them killing more characters is because we're in the endgame now as in the boys probably has 2 more seasons to go and they're also going to start killing a lot of people like by the end I expect most of the main supes and at least half of the boys to be dead so as the gen v characters get pulled into that they're also going to start getting killed off but idc they better not touch Jordan and Marie I'm not kidding I already have hives thinking about stranger things maybe killing Steve in the last season I don't need this 😂😂😂😂

right EXACTLY jordan marie cate 🔛🔝

i genuinely didn’t expect them to pivot on cate’s character bc i really thought they’d stick with cate wanting to be good/wanting to be a hero, trying to earn her friends’ trust back, but i’m SOOO glad that they’re going the villain/anti-hero route. especially with marie and cate now on opposing sides and them basically being each other’s narrative foils, like i need them to go full on villain with cate like it’s just too good a set up for a really complex relationship between marie and cate.

*sighs* okay so my thing with andre is that he COULD’VE been a really interesting character. like, daddy issues, bisexual, doesn’t really care about being a superhero and lowkey in love with his best friend (the writers are cowards for not making the throuple happen) like there were so many ways his character could’ve been done, but then he ended up being a stereotypical nepo baby. it’s kinda like the writers put little to no effort in his character development and didn’t even try to make him likable 😭 he just constantly gets thrown around by the other characters, he slept with his best friend’s girlfriend, and he’s just kind of a dick in general. really the only thing i found really genuine and likable about andre was his love for luke, and to a certain extent, cate. but beyond that, he’s just not a very sympathetic character to me idk 😭

honestly, i’m not suuper attached to any of the boys characters, maybe it’s bc i always end up taking super long breaks between binge watching but if they decided to start killing off main characters, i think i’d be fine (except kimchie or starlight pls don’t touch them thx) but THEY BETTER NOT TOUCH MARIE OR JORDAN OR I’M STARTING A RIOT IN THE PRIME VIDEO BUILDING FR like you could even take cate from me just dont touch limoreau…

i’m gonna be honest, i kinda wish gen v was less tied into the boys and got to stand on its own more bc i really need homelander to stay FARRRRRR away from marie and jordan and cate. butcher too. but also bc i really liked the college setting but seeing as how we now know the entire college is a scam, it might completely move away from godolkin, which is a shame bc i loved the superhero college-sky high esque concept of it and i wish we had gotten MORE of it before we got into all the plot heavy stuff but…it is what it is ig 🤷🏼‍♀️

[mikiafina]

“Exotic Life Form — I”

Message:

Greetings. This story were inspired by @genshinarchives from their work, of seelie!gn!reader x genshin characters.

Dear genshinarchives, if you ever stumbled upon this work of mine and were felt like I stole your ideas and didn't like this posted anymore, we can talk about it peacefully so feel free to message me if so.

The reader's pronouns in this story is not really mentioned but the reader I have in mind as I write this is female, so be warned. Also, masterlist are gonna be posted and pinned soon so stay tuned!

Note:

CRITICISM ARE ALWAYS WELCOMED! IF YOU NOTICED ANY ERRORS IN MY WORK, FEEL FREE TO POINT IT OUT SO I COULD FIX IT!

——————————

I DO NOT POST IN ANY OTHER PLATFORMS EXCEPT HERE ON TUMBLR!

Trigger Warning:

Grammatical Errors, misspellings, typos, ooc, possibly curse words, use of informal language and not proof-read yet

Synopsis:

Genshin characters who were minding their own business, going through their day like any other normal occurrence of their life. When for some huge coincidence or just pure horrible luck— they were yeeted into your world, the modernized world.

How would they fare in a world they have no knowledge of? Will they last? How would they get back to their own world?

Inspired by:

@genshinarchives

“[Name]! Over here!” Your friend waved you over their table when your roamed your eyes around the interior of the café, walking over to them as you clutched your backpack's strap tighter.

“Yo, sorry ‘m late. Didn't notice the time, I was too preoccupied with my work.” You smiled as your friends shrugged off your unusual tardiness, warmth filled you as butterflies swirled around your stomach in a warming way.

“Yeah, it's fine. We know you're busy, its even amazing to think that you could find a free time despite of your cramped schedule. Multiple works in everyday as routine, heck, its amazing just imagining that you can multitask in such advanced level.” One of your friends chimed in, apparently in a state of amazed at your skills. After all, not all could do what you do as an everyday normal occurrence in life.

“Working multiple jobs ain't hard and stressful if your work is also a hobby of yours, instead, it'll be a fun work. Enough of that, any updates? I haven't been able to come out of my house for quite some time, even checking my personal accounts are too much so, spill the tea.” You brought out your laptop and tablet along with your favourite sketchbook and notebook, placing them all in the table and in your lap.

“Seriously? You're gonna do work even here? No wonder the bag that you chose to use is a backpack. Take a break sometimes, you need a vacation!” Like a rebellious kid who's being reprimanded, you weren't listening and continued where you left on sketching the draft of your commission.

“Speaking of vacations, you said you want tea, I have a tea. I recently found this website through an ad, it seems pretty legit so I tried it. The website is all about promoting an island that seemed to be ‘granting’ wishes, multiple feedbacks claimed that their said to be wishes were granted.” [Friend name] showed the said website's homepage, earning a scoff from the rest of your friends.

“Seriously, they believe the feedbacks? For all we know, they might be bought by the developers of the website. They're just planning to scam us of our moneys!” One of them claimed, slamming their hands on the table. People inside the café turned their heads towards your group making you sigh, you had no choice but to calm your friend down and apologize for the commotion and distraction that your table had caused.

“I had my fun, thank you for inviting me you guys. Take care on your way home and be careful!” You waved them goodbye and went on your way home, tugging your jacket closer to your shivering frame.

*squeak*

*squeaks*

Huh? Squeaks? Did you just hear squeaking? Where did it come from? What in the world would create squeaking noises?

Many questions swirled around your pretty head like a raging tornado, you slowly walked in to an alleyway where you assumed the noise came from. Looking around, you shone your phone's flashlight to provide at least a little of vision.

In the corner of your peripheral vision, you saw a wornout box shook frantically. When you stalked closer, abruptly, the box's lid slammed open eliciting a shriek of fright from you as a blob of liquid? Substance? Fluid? Floated in the air in front of you, what?

The blob floated closer to your frame and seemed to be in distress? The way it shook that causes its fluid body to shook along is what you assumed to be a body language of distress, upon closer look, the blob's appearance is strikingly similar to genshin's pet seelie.

As you were focused on the blob of fluid in front of you, your wrist phone rung as it vibrated. Startled, you snoozed the alarm and checked the time, only to realize at how late it is. Without any thoughts running in your mind, you tried to gently tuck the blob of fluid into your bag before wearing it on the front.

In hopes to get home as quick as possible, you run like your life was depending on it (well sort of, its late and you never know what kind of evil guys are lurking. Stay safe everyone!). You gently clutched the bag as you run to ensure that the blob of fluid wouldn't fall to the speed that you are running.

Upon arriving inside, you put your backpack down the floor softly as you slump on to the soft cushion of your couch. Leaning back as you let your tense muscles relax against the couch, completely forgetting about the blob you took home with you.

Minutes passed and you fell asleep without noticing, the blob of fluid wiggled its way out of your bag. Seeing that you fell asleep on the couch, the blob of fluid grabbed the folded blanket on the one-seat couch and pushed you to lay down comfortably in the couch, draping the blanket on your frame to prevent you from catching cold.

"Oh traveler! Just right on time, I received a commission and I know that only you can solve it. Another adventurer stumbled upon a ruin, and they claimed that outside the ruin, there's a huge group of abyss mages. They said that the device they have also grasped an unusual elemental activity going on from the ruin's direction, can you do the commission? I can assign someone who can take it if you won't." Katherine put a hand on her chest in a gentle manner, smiling at Traveler softly.

"Alright, I'll do it. I'm going out anyways, might as well do some commission while I'm at it." Traveler mumbled to himself as he took the paper from Katherine's hand, reading over the quest's information.

'Hmm.. There aren't much written information about the ruin.. I guess I'll end this quick, I still need to look for clues about Lumine's whereabouts..' Traveler thought as his lips formed a thin line, walking away from Katherine with Paimon bidding farewell to her.

"Traveler! Behind you! Look! There's a strange orb!" Paimon screamed, attracting me more abyss mage in their direction. Aether can't help but to click his tongue in annoyance, Paimon noticed Aether's mood and hid.

'Where do they keep coming up?... This is annoying me already.. I still need to find Lumine..' Aether defeated the abyss mage without letting any escape, feeling his temper boiling uncharacteristically, he stalked closer to the said strange orb and examined it.

"Uh.. Traveler..? Are you alright now?.." Paimon quietly asked as she appeared beside Aether who's inspecting the orb, seeing that his lips are still in a thin line, Paimon stopped talking and floated few steps back, not wanting to annoy Aether.

"What is this? Shall we submit this to Alhaitham or Kaveh? This thing look suspicious.." Aether lowly asked as he turned to Paimon who gave no response. Paimon got startled and panicked in her words as she answer Aether, doing her best not to cause any more further annoyance to the blonde traveler.

Just as the two were talking, the strange orb glowed brightly causing Paimon's and Aether's sight to be temporarily disabled. The whole situation cause Paimon to shriek in surprise and floated few steps back further in attempt to lessen the blinding light that's hitting her eyes. When Paimon's vision went back, Aether was no where yo be found and the dull blade that he was holding were left behind under the strange orb, laying in the orb's shadow.

Crying and panicking, Paimon flew back to Sumeru and stumbled upon Alhaitham, Kaveh, Cyno and Tighnari. The floating albino(?) raced through the air towards the four men, slamming herself against Tighnari's hold. She cried as her tears kept falling like river and her voice cracks ever so often, Paimon tried to explain what had occured in the ruin within her best but the only thing that the four men grasped in her explanation is that Aether suddenly went missing and that there's a strange orb inside a strange ruin.

"Wait- wait Paimon! Aether went missing? And what are you talking about? There's no such ruin like you mentioned in the outskirt of the forest, I would know if such ruin exist because me and the other forest rangers frequently patrol the whole territory." Tighnari made an attempt to calm the crying floating creature as he asked her numerous questions.

"Like I said! Aether and I were investigating a strange ruin! And Aether suddenly disappeared when this light from the strange orb that we found at the end of the ruin blinded us! All I heard was Aether groaning in surprise followed by his sword clanking on the ground! Then when Paimon opened her eyes, Aether were no longer beside her!" Paimon explained more cohesively as she cries harder, scared for her best friend's safety and location.

Alhaitham calmed Paimon down and suggested that they go to the Adventurers guild and post a commission on finding their blonde traveler, asking people on the way for clues and leads. The search for the Traveler had went on for 5 days and still no lead and clues or fruit in their search, the only clue and lead they have is the ruin that Paimon had mentioned so they decided to investigate the ruin themselves and find out the truth.

® mikiafina

[tuherrus]

Could you do a TL;DR of the whole Kino thing, please?

i can't promise that this will be much shorter but i'll do my very best for you anon!

DISCLAIMER ONCE AGAIN DO NOT HARASS KINO OR DO ANYTHING STUPID, i'm not your dad but use some common sense

i'm pulling info from the doc currently available here and asks and messages i've received which are available in the tag kinodraws on my blog, everything is alleged, use your own brain and make your own judgement on whether you wish to support kino

kino (they/them), current account kinodraws on most platforms, is a fairly popular online artist and now tattoo artist who has for years on various accounts scammed people out of money via unfulfilled commissions, fundraisers and recently even a charity zine (the doc mentions a bunch of other allegations of bad behavior and random stuff like ghosting webcomic companies etc but i'll try to keep this brief and focus on what i feel is most relevant)

some of kino's previous accounts and their scamming related to them:

PAISELEY, currently permabanned on furaffinity, here's a livejournal of a bunch of people corroborating their experiences being scammed by kino through unfulfilled commissions

CAPONE, also permabanned on furaffinity for the same reasons

RIVETS, permabanned once again on furaffinity for scamming

ARTIST BEWARE PAGE, the user got a refund after nearly an entire year of messaging kino about the subject

RUN ME THROUGH ZINE, all pages of which kino deleted, the proceeds of which were supposed to go to charity, you can find a lot of the things related to this on my tag and pinned post it was an ofmd zine and was very badly managed (missing artists and pieces etc etc) that ended up never being released kino ghosts the zine, deletes the pages and pockets the money made (allegedly $1300 but we have no real way of knowing how much the proceeds actually were), posts a falsified receipt only after people pressure them to speak on the matter after months of silence, people contact the charity and the charity reports kino donated just $1 kino once again goes silent and only after a giant uproar they FINALLY donate the money to the charity, but not before they blame someone else for not posting receipts about it (it was kino's responsibility) and guilt tripping people about how they've been harassed (again i do not condone harassment but people literally wanted them to just donate the money where it was supposed to go in the first place and they refused to even address that nor why they forged the first receipt)

kino also has a tendency to make expensive frivolous purchases (electronics, a hot tub, tattoos, a custom chair....) time and time again once they've scammed money out of people via whatever method they've chosen (they often post about these purchases too after deleting whatever emergency commissions post or a post asking for donations), and while far be it from me to tell someone what to do with their finances, they can't seem to stop scamming in order to get money

so i'd strongly suggest not supporting kino! they manipulate, lie and steal and claim they're a victim of some mass bullying campaign when in reality they've spent seventeen years scamming people out of money and people are getting rightfully angry! they also will likely continue to do so as long as people give them money

again use your own brain when reading people's testimonies about kino, a lot of them in the tag on my blog, but i believe these people and that their experiences are real considering the number of messages i've received (some of which people wished to remain private)

kino's made their bed and i want them to finally lie in it, so even if one person is convinced not to support kino via all this information then i'll be satisfied

i'm sorry this still got so long!