#with all his femininity and the gender roles of the society he lives in (''you have to masculine to be male'' bullshit)

[bloggrgirl]

this is not how mental illnesses work but i truly feel that if i look at jensen ackles too much i will develop gender dysphoria

[collaredkittyboy]

Well it's come up multiple times today so I'll make a post about it.

I think the popularization of the word "twink" has ultimately been really bad for people in general.

I know it's hard to track the positive and negative effects of language but I don't think it's hard to see how creating a word for a group of people wherein the most consistent qualifying trait is "being skinny" is healthy for people's self image. Obviously people have lots of ideas about what it means to be a twink- gay, lacking body hair, feminine, beautiful, young, white- but the most consistent descriptor I've seen is "skinny." Hell, it's even a body type on Grindr; the size below "average."

So it kind of functions as a code word in the gay community: anyone can say that they're only interested in twinks and they don't have to look shallow by saying they only like skinny guys. It's such an accepted attitude that no one really bats an eye when they hear it.

I'm not even going to get into how it's become part of the larger issue of people turning "top" and "bottom" into gender roles 2.0, but that is closely related, because people with any internalized homophobia can look at a skinny, feminine man and turn off their fag alarms by viewing him as a woman or not a "real" man, and it makes twinks more acceptable to society at large.

No, ignoring all of that, one of the biggest issues is that gay men are taught by society that they are only attractive while they are skinny. Just having the label "twink" reminds a boy that people are looking at his body and judging it. There were countless times when I was growing up that people would tell me, "You're such a twink," or argue about whether or not I qualified as a twink because I had body hair. People around you, unpromted, judge your body and give you a label based on it, and that label has a large influence on whether or not you're seen as objectively attractive. I know many other gay people who say they wish they were a twink so they could be more attractive to guys.

So think, you have all these kids growing up being told whether or not they qualify as a twink, and then we have the gay community as a whole where it's completely acceptable to say you're only attracted to twinks. I think its because of all of this pressure to be a twink (in other words, to have a below average weight) that many of the gay people that I interact with struggle with a negative body image or eating disorders.

I mean, people talk about "twink death" like it's an actual event that makes a gay man much less attractive, and no one thinks that, maybe, it's harmful to tell a guy that the very day he stops being young and thin and pretty, he will stop being attractive and celebrated?

I'm not qualified to speak on fatphobia in physical queer spaces because I don't have the ability to frequent them where I live, but I can't imagine that these aren't issues at social gatherings as well. I also can't speak on my own experiences with weight discrimination because so far in my life I have had a naturally thin body, but I have experienced a lot of outside pressure to be thin that have caused me to pick up unhealthy eating habits to reduce my weight in fear that I could become fat later on. Thankfully that is something that I've mostly been able to work past. I'm not an expert, but idk, I just wanted to rant on my silly tumblr blog.

Obviously it's impossible for a word to be inherently bad. I'm not trying to imply that saying "twink" is a magic word with evil powers. Obviously the real issues at play here are fatphobia and harmful beauty standards and body shaming. But in my opinion, the popular use of the word twink has made it much easier and acceptable to express fatphobia, etc, in the gay community by turning "skinny person" into a "type of guy that you should try to be so you can be attractive."

[ceruleanskies48]

Mizu’s Affinities with Trans Women

While many folks have drawn parallels between Mizu’s life experiences and those of trans men (AFAB living as a man, wearing a binder, deepening her voice, adopting masculine mannerisms, etc.), an under-explored topic is her affinities with trans women. 

From as early as Mizu can remember, she was forced to hide her femininity and live as a boy. In flashbacks, we see her “Mama” forcefully shaving her head, saying she “must be a boy, always a boy,” while she sadly clutches her fallen locks of hair. Mama’s supposed death in the hut fire only further cements in her the importance of living as a boy for her safety—to protect herself from the “bad men”—and it also leads her to seek vengeance, which requires her to live as a man (as Madame Kaji says, "under the law, revenge is a luxury for men like you"). In Mizu’s conversation with Mikio, she also confirms that she didn’t want to live as a man but had no choice but to do so because of the bad men and her revenge. 

Indeed, when Mizu is briefly given the opportunity to live as a woman, she takes it. Even before her marriage to Mikio, when she was reunited with Mama, she chose to dress like a woman. She no longer needed to live as a man since (as Mama explains) the bad men believed she died in the fire, and she was no longer on her revenge quest. When Mama exhausts Mizu’s savings, it’s notable that Mizu agrees to the arranged marriage instead of going back to living as a man to make money. 

Similar to trans women, however, Mizu was not socialized to live as a woman. She initially struggles to conform to womanly roles in Edo society, like acting appropriately submissive to her husband, moving elegantly (she’s shown to be clumsy while doing chores), and cooking meals. According to the Lead Character Designer, they intentionally made her women’s clothing fit awkwardly given her height. She is also self-conscious of her looks and how she does not fit the feminine ideals of her times. She’s used to people calling her ugly (including Mama, Swordfather, and Mikio). In a cut scene from Ep. 4, Mizu tries to put her hair up and gauge whether she could be considered attractive but concludes that she cannot. She exhibits jealousy toward Akemi (more on that here) for how she epitomizes feminine beauty and privilege and judges her for not appreciating the fact that she can “have anything she wants,” including the epitome of prizes for Edo women, a marriage into the Shogunate. 

Mizu’s marriage with Mikio also exhibits parallels to the safety challenges trans women can face in romantic relationships. Despite her initial struggles, Mizu is eventually able to win Mikio’s heart, in part by suppressing her more masculine attributes. For example, she pretends to not be able to throw the knife to cut down the apple. But for a little while, she is able to live a happy life, as a woman.

Her mother told her to hide her past, but she eventually trusts Mikio enough to reveal that she was raised as a boy and lived as a man. And not only any man, but a man dedicated to the most masculine Edo pursuit of swordsmanship. The fact that Mikio seemed not only open-minded about this but eager to see “all of her,” leads her to show him her masculine side as well. Unfortunately this backfires spectacularly. He rejects her, calling her a monster. Interestingly, Mizu intuited the connection between his rejection and her gender presentation. She tried to smooth things over by putting on makeup and her wedding kimono to use her femininity to soften his heart and implicitly show her willingness to suppress her masculinity and commit wholly to being his feminine wife, but it was already too late. He leaves her to be killed by the armed men (he was also most likely the one who ratted her out: see here).

The deaths of Mikio and Mama not only mark the end of her relationships with them but also the end of her life as a woman. She concludes she has nothing left in life but her revenge quest, which necessitates her living as a man. For a brief moment, she thought she could be herself and be loved, but that dream came crashing down with betrayal and tragedy. 

All of this is why I’m personally a huge sucker for feminine Mizu moments. I find them quite subversive even though she is AFAB. I hope in Season 2 she’ll be able to spend at least some of the time living as a woman since she won’t have the bounty on her head to worry about and it might actually be easier for her to present as a woman in London accompanying Fowler. Also, it would be empowering for her to explore leveraging her femininity as power rather than having to constantly suppress it. Here’s to kick-ass Mizu in a dress! 🍻 

[donnapalude]

i think a lot of extreme readings on louis's character painting him either as the true abuser or as an helpless victim are failing to capture one of the main points of his story and of the portrayal of vampirism as a gift, which is the well-worn fictional theme of how terrible it can be to obtain everything you ever wanted.

throughout the interview louis is not just trying to exculpate himself or, on the other hand, just trying to come to terms with the abuse received. he, is of course, doing neither and both. he is trying to untangle the particular guilt created when harm descends on yourself and others from a situation that you did not directly create, but from which you partly benefitted. the fact that this guilt gets rielaborated for a long time through a pre-existing tendency for self-deception, does not mean that the harm received was not real or that the deception was only internal. it just signals that in order to move forward, louis needs to come to terms with the specific ways his own issues have informed the events in iwtv.

louis is a character profoundly scored by contrasting feelings of shame. even before meeting lestat, his role in society as an homosexual black man creates a set of conflicting instincts and expectations impossible to fulfill simultaneously. his feminine coding in the story is not arbitrary, but a logical consequence of the exclusion of blackness and homosexuality from the societal construct of masculinity. the standard societal role that men are expected to fulfill is of course one of dominance, assertiveness, and aggressiveness, translated in all spheres of life, be it professional, familial, or sexual. as a man, and in particular the head of his family, louis is supposed to fit into all of these expectations. however, as the rhetoric around the subjugation of black people relies on the (covert or overt) image of them as violent savages that need to be civilised, black-maleness is associated with an over-dramatisation of these characteristics (hypermasculinity), which ideologically requires the submission of black men in order to control the threat they pose. which means, as a black man trying to fit in white society, louis is also expected to react graciously to subduing, suppress anger, and appear non-threating (even sexually). on top of that, homosexuality entails an inherent humiliation into feminisation, as the masculine role of dominance does not exist in a vacuum, but is directly constructed upon the submission of women. and the breaking of gender roles for louis is compounded by some of his own personal traits, which lean towards nurturing, sensitivity and passivity. a passivity that, incidentally, is also informed by the tiredeness descending from his own parentified role in the family and by the many different necessities pulling him at the same time.

the picture painted here is extremely complicated. louis is not simply a man failing in his gender role. he lives in a society that assigns to him both masculine and feminine traits and punishes him when he cannot achieve them, while at the same time shaming him when he displays them. he feels shame over his sexual and violent urges, but also inadequate when he does not perform dominance. he feels ashamed of his desire for passivity and motherhood, but also inadequate when he cannot control his aversion to actual subjugation. he wants all of it: he wants to be powerful, respected, and strong, but he also wants to care and be cared for, to relax into the power of someone else, and to be able to avoid the responsibility of always being the one making decisions. he wants, in other words, to be a full human being. but the fragmentation of his identity in society will not allow it. and the cost of failing to maintain this delicate balance is not just societal reproach, there is a direct threat of violence hanging over him. this creates a paralysis in decision-making and identity-building that heavily colors louis's choices throughout his life.

part of how he deals with this in order to function, is by creating fictional roles for himself to inhabit and denying the aspects of himself he dislikes by projecting them on others. in s1, for instance, there is something to be said about louis taking all the masculine traits he feels ashamed of (the bloodlust, the desire for violence, the desire for (gay) sex) and assigning them to lestat, as well as blaming their growth in him to lestat's influence and vampirism. which is not an incorrect reading of the situation. the predatory drive he sees in lestat is not only an externalisation of his own issues. he is actually being hunted. and then of course he is actually being abused. moreover, vampirism does enhance his violent instincts. but all of this is also not a causal coincidence between reality and his own illusions. part of the reason louis loves lestat and is attracted to vampirism (because of him and through him), is precisely that they represent unashamed possession of what he hates in himself. he admires lestat for this and he also feels relief over his presence, as it enables him to experience those traits vicariously with reduced self-blaming by directing any condemnation externally. moreover, the stalking and power-imbalance and the forced turning create a fracture in his instincts. they provide him with seduction and power he did desire and they do that by permitting him to claim a passive role in them, so that he can avoid culpability. this is extremely confusing, as i don't think he is ever able to fully reconcile how much of what happened he wanted to happen.

from an external point of view, the audience can at least see he did not really want to be subjected to violence and he perceives a real danger of it from lestat, which then gets realised. as much as the masculine, but respectful business-owner was a persona he assumed to navigate that threat in society, the adaptable housewife is also a persona he assumes to navigate that threat with lestat. and these are unsparing calculations made to physically avoid harm by performing the characteristics better suited for it in any given moment. but the specific choices made to obtain this result are clearly tied to an exaggereted exploration of feminine and masculine roles that he would not have been able to fully inhabit without the excuse of a threat, due to the mentioned combination of shame and perceived deficiency. as shame begets pride, however, the assumption of these roles is also meant to claw back some margin of agency through the construction of a self-image that is not tied to victimhood. in other words, creating for himself the belief that through this exaggerations he is just voluntarily expressing his true self and not only reacting to the constrictions of external circumtances, allows him to bear his reality by believing it was born at least partly out of his own choices and that it helped him obtain at least some favourable outcomes.

there is a fascinating tension in him, in both wanting to deny his culpability and free-will in events in order to absolve himself and at the same time not feeling worthy of this absolution and perceiving its acceptance as a further sin. moreover, there is attraction towards powerlessness as a state devoid of the burden of decision-making, but also a rejection of it due to the guilt generated by feeling co-responsible in his own victimisation because of his passivity.

in a healthy, safe environment all of this could be reconciled. however, "marrying" lestat and becoming a vampire create an interesting conundrum, whereby he receives solutions that are technically able to magically fulfill all of his most secret, shameful, and contradictory desires (bloodlust, hunger, power, violence, sex, motherhood, submissivness), but through circumstances where his consent is severely impaired and with consequences that are harmful to both himself and others. so that he finds himself unable to fully forgive himself (he did want these things to happen, although not this way, and he does enjoy some aspects of them), but also unable to escape the situation. he occupies a state of victimhood that he perceives of his own making, which further impairs him from rejecting it, as staying in it is both denial and penance.

the ending of season 2 being centred on him accepting vampirism as a gift is a full circle. the liberation achieved after the interview is not, i think, a simple recognition that there was nothing he could have done to prevent events and that he deserves to live a full life as a consequence. there are many possible nuances to this and the situation with armand deserves a whole different conversation, but on a very basic level i think what matters most is the acceptance that he will never know, exactly, what alternative course of action could have been taken. he knows what he did not do: he did not have an active role in paul's suicide, his estrangement with his family, and claudia's murder. but his shame and tendency to self-sacrifice have created a situation of immobility that impedes him from taking full stock of the part his wants have played in events. and to fully rielaborate his role as a victim he will need, i think, more reflection on that. but in the meantime, what is sure is that protracting the same tendency by denying himself any enjoyment of his vampire life and placing all the blame for his turning and their relationship on lestat (though he is to blame for many many things), would just constitute a further attempt to avoid guilt by negating that those wants ever existed at all. the way forward is only one. to accept everything he wants and be purposeful with it now. to refuse the gift does not eliminate the terrible things that came with it, it just ignores them. maybe, by honoring it, he can honor them too. and try to avoid them from happening again.

[bakersgrief]

A/n: Finally, the winner of my wip poll, described as "Emma likes breasts." What it really is:

Ikepri with a masc lesbian Mc

Part 1: domestic faction

Leon

He's a bro, what more is there to say?

You like women? Cool.

But do you like steak?

Even if you don't, you're one of his bros now.

Takes you to the tavern for a good meal and a drink every time he convinces you to sneak out with him.

Thinks your non-traditional gender expression is super rad.

That's what he's fighting for in Rhodolite, for people to have the freedom to love who they want and live as they please.

Yves

Femboy and tomboy solidarity!

This bisexual legend doesn't care who you like, he still won't accept you as Belle!

Aaaaaand... he's attached to you now.

The bond between a lesbian and a little boy kitty cat is unbreakable, you should have known that going in.

Helps you put together formal outfits that match your gender presentation.

If you don't want to wear a dress to a party, he's got you covered!

Licht

...Okay

He'll still give you the cold shoulder at first, sorry.

He'll warm up to you once he sees how open and accepting you are.

The strength and determination you have that comes from existing outside of society's rigid gender roles and stereotypes is dazzling to him.

You'll still have to put in some work to get to know him, but he's very protective of you now.

Would accompany you to town or hang around while you're on a date if you ever felt unsafe while in public.

Jin

Ah, a woman with taste.

Tries to recruit you in his battle of breasts vs thighs with Clavis.

Stops the flirting, unless you're cool with playful flirting between friends.

Takes you to the tavern with him for drinks and introduce you to some of his lady friends.

Will also help you find nice clothes that aren't too feminine for you. Gotta look good for the ladies, after all.

[anonymousewrites]

One Hell of a Love Pride Special 2024

Sebastian Michaelis x Demon! Reader

Pride Special 2024

            “Sneaking out? How disloyal,” teased (Y/N) as they stood waiting for Sebastian.

            “ ‘Sneaking out’ is such a crass term,” said Sebastian, arriving by (Y/N)’s side. “I do hope you know I’m above that.”

            “Of course,” said (Y/N), taking his arm as he offered it. “Simply teasing.”

            “The kitten has claws,” murmured Sebastian, leaning in to kiss (Y/N).

            They kissed him in return. “You know I do. Now, what are we doing out?”

            “The other servants were particularly destructive this evening, and the young master requested a quiet night to himself, in not quite-so-polite terms,” said Sebastian.

            “And you decided that meant date night?” said (Y/N), chuckling.

            “You must seize every opportunity for a good time,” said Sebastian. “And I insist on having a moment to treat my darling as they deserve.” He patted their arm and smirked. “We play the roles of servants, and yet we are so much more. Occasionally, we must indulge.”

            “Indulge?” said (Y/N), smirking. “What do you have in mind, dear?” They trailed their fingers up his arm.

            “Nothing like that,” said Sebastian, chuckling. “Though I’m sure it’ll be later.” He grinned. “For now, I have a…gift for you.”

            “A gift?” (Y/N) raised a brow.

            “A gift,” said Sebastian, refusing to elaborate.

            “I’m intrigued,” said (Y/N). “It better be worth the mystery.”

            “I can assure you, it is,” said Sebastian. “I would only ever treat you to the best.”

            “What an excellent partner you are,” said (Y/N), laughing lightly.

            “One hell of a lover,” said Sebastian with a wink.

l

            “Here we are,” said Sebastian, gesturing to the familiar bar.

            “It’s the same place as our Valentine’s Day date,” said (Y/N). Their nose twitched questioningly.

            “Indeed,” said Sebastian. “I recalled that you liked it, so I kept an eye out for another event like that one.”

            “And what is the event tonight?” said (Y/N).

            Sebastian led them in. “It is an event they have deemed ‘Pride.’ ”

            “Like the sin?” said (Y/N).

            “Precisely,” said Sebastian as they entered the hidden bar properly.

            Lively music was playing, and the couples they had seen before—so far from society’s current standards of “normal”—were dancing wildly. Couples were kissing, people were laughing, and the mirth of all these people not accepted by “civil” society grew with every moment.

            “What-What is this event?” asked (Y/N), staring in surprise.

            “It is for people like us,” said Sebastian. “Those who do not fit what society has deemed acceptable in terms of sexuality.” He looked at them and smiled. “Or gender.”

            “And they’re…proud here? They’re happy?” said (Y/N).

            “As proud and happy as you should be to be standing here today,” said Sebastian, kissing their forehead.

            Indeed, (Y/N) was.

            They had been made to play a role in society they hadn’t been pleased with in life. They had been born into it with no choice to express themself in the way they wanted to. But now…Felis the demon stood tall, able to be themself. They could dress masculine one day, feminine another, play every role as they wished. They were free to be proud in their identity.

            “This is…lovely, Corvus,” murmured (Y/N). “Thank you.”

            “Of course,” said Sebastian.

            He was, of course, glad that (Y/N) had died and become a demon. They were a fantastic demon and the love of his eternity. But he also knew they hadn’t gotten the life they deserved. They hadn’t lived as they wanted. So Sebastian gave them a moment to see that there were places to be proud of their identity outside of society’s dictations and rules.

            (Y/N) held his hand tightly and smiled at him. “I love you, Corvus.”

            “I love you, too, Felis,” said Sebastian.

            He leaned in and kissed them, and they kissed him back passionately. When they separated, Sebastian and (Y/N) smiled at one another.

            “Oh, what a beautiful display of passion and ardor!” said a familiar voice.

            (Y/N) and Sebastian’s faces fell into deadpans.

            “Show me such adoration!” said Grell, launching herself at them.

            (Y/N) and Sebastian stepped to the side, and Grell fell to the ground.

            “Sebastian, we can never come back here,” said (Y/N). “They have riffraff.”

            “Apologies,” sighed Sebastian. “What a disappointment.”

            “Hey!” cried Grell, standing up and crossing her arms. “I’m here for this ‘Pride’ Event or whatever, too!”

            “Oh, yes, I forgot that you flirt with everything that moves,” said (Y/N).

            “Only the attractive ones,” said Grell, winking. “Now, I’m not here to fight, just to have a good time.” She twirled around in a red dress. “I’m here to show myself off.”

            “So you’re not going to bother us again?” said Sebastian, raising an eyebrow.

            “Well, I might ask for a dance or two,” joked Grell.

            “Fine,” said (Y/N). They waved a hand. “This is a celebration for all of people like us. Even the crazier ones.”

            “You’re not going to throw me out?” said Grell, brightening.

            “We’re…tolerating her?” said Sebastian dubiously.

            “Just for tonight,” said (Y/N) to both of them. They smiled sharply. “But if she tries anything, I’ll personally handle her.” They crossed their arms. “But she’ll behave, right? We’re a community right now.”

            “R-Right,” said Grell, scared.

            “Well, then, Grell, welcome to the party,” said Sebastian. He crossed his arms and watched Grell happily scamper off to dance.

            “Don’t worry, Sebastian, we’ll have plenty of time to ourselves,” said (Y/N), kissing his cheek. “But Grell is like me. Getting a chance to be herself after living unhappily. Just…give her a moment.”

            Sebastian sighed. “I am indulging you because I love you, I hope you know that.”

            “I know. I’ll make it worth the trouble,” said (Y/N), laughing and kissing his cheek. “Now, come on. Let’s dance.”

            Sebastian let them pull him onto the dance floor. He supposed their pride was worth the trouble. He loved them.

Taglist:

@technikerin23

@im-making-an-effort

@izzieg3987

@jinxxangel13

@alexpangender

@otomyoli

@neenieweenie

@nex-crowley

@anxious-chick

@bellacastiel

@v1l-ismissing

@agentdedf1sh

@iamsexytrash

@oceansfloor

@sarkzjam

@temporarilyablog

@elaemae

@urlocalsabito

@roo024

@ittomain1

[sokkas-therapist]

Ok so I decided I am going to post that “atla live action hot take” I mentioned

Click below the cut if you’re interested in hearing my take on the whole “taking away sokka’s sexism” thing

1) nobody is glorifying sokka’s sexism by saying it should be kept in the show. It’s quite literally the opposite. The original series did a great job using his sexism as a lesson; any time sokka made a sexist remark in the first 4 episodes it was made abundantly clear that he was wrong, and as soon as Sokka was proven wrong he admitted that he was misguided, apologized, quite literally bowed down on his knees to ask for forgiveness, and even asked to learn from the kiyoshi warriors, and excepted wearing their traditional uniforms, further surrendering his flawed perspective of societal gender roles. A wonderfully executed example of writers using their characters to teach viewers a lesson: which was, in this case, that sexism is wrong. Sokka’s sexism was not left unresolved, so why take away a valuable lesson in the show??

2) if you take away a character’s flaws…then they don’t have development. A character can’t learn and grow from their mistakes if they never make mistakes.

If a charecter starts off perfect and unflawed then they are surface level and lack depth or the ability for an arc.

And no, this is not saying that Sokka didn’t have many other admirable qualities like his intelligence and adaptability etc.. He 100% had those qualities. But one of the coolest things about the original atla series was their ability to flesh out side charecters and give them depth. A charecter who is simply smart then becomes smarter, or adaptable then becomes even more adaptable, lacks depth and internal conflict.

Sokka’s sexism was the starting point for his internal conflict. Sokka wasn’t just sexist to be sexist, or because the entire southern water tribe was misogynistic (and we know for a fact they weren’t, because if they were misogynistic, then Katara wouldn’t have been shocked when the North denied her waterbending training). He was misogynistic because being seen/accepted as a “man” and a strong warrior was all Sokka wanted after his father left him behind. In reality, we know his father was only trying to protect his son from the horrors of war. But to a young and impressionable child, Sokka internalized this as him not being “man” enough, so he dedicated himself to becoming the person he thought would make his father proud. He was always reaching for this unattainable standard he set for himself, which lead to him having a skewed and toxic view of masculinity that he took out on the women around him. He associated being a worthy warrior with being a traditionally masculine man, and leaned way too far into fulfilling the gender roles men and women are told to play in society in hopes of gaining his father’s approval. We see him do this by suppressing his feelings of inferiority as a nonbender, along with all the aspects of himself that he thought could be seen as “weak” or “feminine” (ex: his love for shopping and poetry and art that we see develop up until the literal end of the series).

So clearly, the vast majority of sokka’s charecter development that deals with internal conflict stems from the toxic view of masculinity and gender roles that he adopted after being left behind by his father, which caused him to outwardly lash out toward katara and Suki with misogynist comments. So taking away the sexism we see in the first few episodes eliminates important context that makes sokka’s character development throughout the entire series significant, not just an “iffy unnecessarily bigoted message”, because it was quite literally used to show that sexism was wrong.

I wasn’t going to say anything about this at first but seeing so many people display a fundamental lack of understanding for the premise of character development and the usage of charecter flaws to promote positive messages in media set me off. Just…WTF????

(Also I know I wrote a summarized version of this in the tags for another post but I wanted to expand upon it more and make this a separate post)

[ca-suffit]

Hi. I love your blog. Good conversations are happening here and I love reading through them all. I have a question re: the depiction of Louis as a woman in what I don't believe to be AU scenarios. Forgive me if my vocab is a bit stilted, English isn't my first language.

I'm a cis, pan, black, female who came into the fandom a bit late. Due to my religious background I haven't been in a lot of queer spaces, online or irl. I've been interacting with the IWTV fandom here, on Twitter and AO3, which has been enlightening. There's a lot of Louis MTF characterization (?), and like the other anon said, most of it is very positive and fun. But, and this may be my ignorance speaking, there's a racial/colourist element in casting Louis as a woman that I think many overlook.

Within the show's universe, Louis took on the more feminine role, particularly in his relationship with Lestat. So when some Twitter user drew Louis as a darkskin man with a very blond Lestat straddling him a la Santiago and Eglee, many accurately argued that drawing him as a hypermasculine black man was very racist. But I haven't seen people mention that despite Louis taking the more feminine (read nurturing) role in Season 1, esp wrt to Claudia, he isn't feminine? Yes, some of his masculinity was a performance (aside from the way that most gender roles are a performance), but Louis is still a masculine man. His masculinity is softer in appearance than maybe most people's in his world, including Lestat's who had no problem dressing up as a woman, but it's still there. In a MTF fanfic I understand making Louis a woman, but in analyzing his characterization in a heteropatriarchal setting Louis is no less a man than Lestat.

My issue is Louis is a very lightskinned black man. Such men are typically not regarded as masculine in the black community, especially if they're homosexual. It's the other side of the coin of darkskin women being denied femininity. So while casting him as a woman in an AU is fine, I find serious analysis of the show that depicts him as a helpless maiden without agency in the face of stronger men and a misogynistic society very wanting. Because aside from being colourist, it also sort of absolves Louis of the harm he inflicts on the women he pimped out, Claudia, and yes, even his companions. It makes it seem like he was only given bad options and he had no choice but to pick the ones he could live with.

And this happens a lot. Anyone who loves Louis more than Lestat and Armand always sees him as a victim. Maybe this is in reaction to the Lestat-centred side of the fandom that always points out everything Louis does wrong. But since I'm not on that side of the fandom, most of the takes I see are in defense of Louis' victimhood as a weaker/feminine man/woman.

Idk if this makes sense at all. Don't post it if it doesn't. I hope it doesn't cause offense to anyone because it's not meant in that way at all. I think maybe there's something I'm missing about how the black/POC/Louis-loving side of the fandom views him, so if anyone who understands things better than I do can tell me what I'm not getting I'll be very grateful.

Thanks for all you do.

hi and thank u!<3

I think there's definitely a lot to talk about here. There's a lot I've observed of the fandom changing over time as the show has aired, bcuz none of this stuff was rly happening with the character of louis until the show aired. I don't have solid thoughts on this all yet, this has me thinking about a lot of things at once and I gotta organize it all. so otherwise I'd like to turn this over to the fandom as a whole to give feedback on for rn.

[blood-orange-juice]

About Childe and his weird gender again, expanding on this post.

I think it has a lot to do with how gender is constructed. Male gender has very clear-cut prescriptions, mostly it's everything that is considered "good" or "human" in current culture. The expectations it places on a person may not be realistic or achievable but they are very clear. Great importance is also placed on separating itself from Everything Female. Things That Are Too Much. Things that break the current culture meaning-making procedures.

Women, while having quite a few prescriptions of their own, also deal with whatever fell through the cracks. Someone needs to ensure the world still functions and reality is never completely covered by whatever official model of the world we currently have.

So women deal with the things men have the luxury not to notice. Mostly bodily and psychological aspects and societal injustice that are not supposed to exist in the ideal picture of society men have imagined. (to be fair, it happens to anyone oppressed and othered. the task of not letting the oppressors meet with reality is delegated to them. I'm just talking about women specifically in this post. but there's a reason oppressed minorities always have ties to supernatural in folklore)

In a way, feminine women are very scary. Walking semiotic horrors.

And I explain all this to say that Childe can be perceived as feminine in two ways.

First, with his disregard for all and any societal norms he just doesn't follow the normal gender prescriptions. He plays a superhero/knight role because it's shiny and it reminds him of the stories he loved as a kid. He doesn't suppress his love for his family because it brings him joy. He looks pretty because looks are a weapon too. He does all these things that would be either stereotypically masculine or painfully unmasculine for anyone else who cares about what society thinks, but he doesn't really see any difference between them. He truly, genuinely doesn't care what others think.

Second, he's also painfully aware of the dark and insane parts of the universe everyone else has the luxury to ignore. He also knows no one cares so he dances around the things a normal guy would never have to deal with (it's such a stereotypical female experience. sometimes I wonder if that's why women rarely like Lovecraft. it's not scary or exciting to them, it's just Tuesday).

But that's just our perception, a trick of light. These are not necessarily gendered.

He also gives an impression of someone extremely vulnerable, yes, but I don't think he handles his vulnerability in a feminine way. He just doesn't hide it and we are used to labeling everything vulnerable as feminine.

He also doesn't really do anything feminine-labeled in a characteristic female way. He isn't really in contact with his emotions (despite having a lot of them), him caring about people takes the form of "protector and provider". his cooking... have you seen his cooking? He doesn't look for support and doesn't try to build things that last. He doesn't accept his vulnerability. If anything, he's trying to pretend he has no vulnerabilities and maybe no psyche at all. He's self-sacrificing in a very male way too. Because he was there and because he could and because it's a cool thing to do.

So he's just that. Himself. Someone outside of gender.

(or rather his gender is knightcore)

If we perceive him as feminine it says more about how our culture perceives gender than about who Childe is.

Also, quoting my previous post, it's a part of him being full of contradictions. For every thing that he does he also does the exact opposite, and this holds for gender too.

Yes he lives the male power fantasy. He also does it in an incredibly feminine way. I think this was Hoyo's original intention and then it blossomed into this human disaster we see.

And to end up on a joke, surely you all have seen that leaked art that is theorised to be Skirk but could have also been an early design of Childe before Hoyo decided to make him a guy.

[thesweetestdevotion]

hi can you do a reading on bts jimin as a boyfriend and husband?

hi! i love bts! lets get into it!

BTS Jimin as a Boyfriend/Husband:

As a Boyfriend:

Dice: 3rd House, Cancer, Moon

Tarot: Seven of Wands, Temperance Reversed, Ten of Wands, The Hierophant, Nine of Cups Reversed, The Moons, The Lover

I see that Jimin is the type of boyfriend that is very loving and nurturing. His dice tell me he's very in tune with his partner's emotions and loves to regularly communicate with them. He could be attracted to people who are close to home, or someone who shares traits that are similar to what he grew up around. He's a nurturing person, maybe he has cancer placements. Or he's attracted to people who have cancer energy. However, i think he might be the type to hide things from his partner. Im not getting anything negative here, but he's the type to want to keep the peace at all costs and this can cause him to bottle up his emotions in an unhealthy way. He seems to already have many burdens outside of his relationships and this affects how hes able to express himself within them. He's very unbalanced in many ways. Right now i keep hearing the lyrics: " I could use a break... Sit around and wait... better days, better days". I don't know that song tbh, but its buzzing in my ear atm. Maybe he constantly feels overwhelmed and has to shoulder many burdens. I think this can lead him to lash out at his partner if he's not able to unload these feelings properly. He wants to keep a facade of perfection around his partner (the moon is illusions, hidden things as well) but this is impossible to achieve for anyone so it often crumbles apart in his hands, leaving him heartbroken. This obsession with maintaining an impeccable image for everyone around him takes a lot of work and energy, and he's often left depleted (aww). He's not a bad person at all! in fact he's extremely relationship oriented, but if he feels unbalanced and insecure in himself its difficult for him to navigate them. He may also prefer traditional dynamics and likes to be in a masculine role, I sense he likes his partner to rely on him but he doesnt want to rely upon others! He sort of longs to prove himself as a man in a very orthodox way, to the point its a bit much and not needed. Due to this, he may try to quash down his naturally "feminine" traits to the point it's harmful for him and others around him as it is ideal to have both energies within oneself. With so much moon energy he's very succeptible to absorbing the energies of his environment, thus leading to more inbalance in him.

As a Husband:

Dice: 9th House, Jupiter, Sagittarius

Tarot: Queen of Swords Reversed, Queen of Wands, The Tower Reversed, Five of Swords Reversed, The Empress, Eight of Coins, Ten of Coins

Okay, for him as a husband, I see he's a lot more in tune with himself. In fact, that whole vibe of keeping his emotions hidden dissolves away. I think marriage gives him the role he really longs for. He looovess being a husband, it comes so easy to him. Jupiter traditionally rules the husband in astrology, and the 9th house can also talk about marriage. I think that although he tends to like people close to home, he might be feel comfortable by marrying outside his culture. Again, I feel he really feels comfortable in these traditional dynamics, so having the role of "husband" allows him the space to be himself. Even if being himself is not necessarily traditional either! He likes the nominative role marriage gives him, its almost like now that he is fulfilling a specific role in society people are less likely to judge or question his presentation. I think hes experienced a lot of people assume things about his gender expression, and he doesnt like to live by other peoples expectations, but he also realizes that society judges him anyway. Being a husband affords him some "protection" from the judging gaze of society. Its sort of like "look! im doing what is "normal", so leave me and my spouse alone!!" i really do get the feeling he's been judged very harshly, especially at a young age (If he marries into a different culture, he'd feel a lot relief from this) He internalized all of these feelings within, which led him to that whole cycle of trying to bottle things up to keep the peace and not rock the boat too much. But in a marriage, especially with a spouse who he feels a very intense sense of comfort with, he feels free to express who he is. Hes able to intergrate the two sides of his personality and be free, hes also more open with his words hehe to the point people might perceive him as being harsh towards his partner. It truly comes down to him being able to express all the things he bottles up, so he lets it all out! He loves family life, and loves to work and work to support a family. I think he enjoys seeing his spouse/family enjoy the fruits of his labor. He also likes a fiery type of person, because he's also like that in many ways. With the empress, there is the sense he does want to start a family at some point, though i dont feel a rush to do so. He's down if and when his spouse is down. He's also willing to work on keeping the romance, intimacy, and fire of a relationship going at all times, he doesnt like stangancy in that way. so sweet hehe

hope you guys like this!! <3

[tobiasdrake]

With your tonal language I can’t tell if you are exaggerating or genuinely hating Yakou.

My relationship with Yakou is complicated, in large part because his creator and I have very different sets of values. Yakou is a character designed to be complicated, but to leave you with an ultimately positive feeling towards him. He's a man haunted by his past, but also one with strong enough values and convictions that he can serve as something of a role model nonetheless.

My issue with Yakou is that a lot of the things that are designated as his flaws - his heavy drinking and willingness to murder - are things I don't have a problem with. Meanwhile, the things that are designated as his virtues? Well....

Kazutaka Kodaka is a man with profoundly heteronormative views on gender that come out in his work. He has strong opinions about binary masculinity and femininity, which get expressed in his writing - and his record with trans and non-binary characters is spotty.

With Yakou, this comes out as a sort of inadvertent foot-in-mouth syndrome, where he can become incredibly obnoxious in the moments where he's meant to be likable simply as a consequence of what Kodaka thinks are good values.

Yakou and Desuhiko are the two characters through which Kodaka explores masculinity. Fubuki, Yuma, Kurumi, and Vivia all have genders, but their stories aren't about gender. Halara, meanwhile, has neither a binary gender nor a story about gender. But Yakou and Desuhiko have masculinity itself as a major topic of conversation.

Which. Means. Kodaka, a guy with spotty views on gender, uses these characters to talk about gender. That's. Okay.

Desuhiko is used as a negative portrayal of masculinity. His worst traits are derived from trying too hard to express his masculinity. He's a kid with low self-esteem chafing under the yoke of trying to live up to a cultural standard, to earn respect by Doing The Thing whether he even understands why he's doing it or not.

This leaves him drifting through life constantly exclaiming "HAVE I MENTIONED HOW STRAIGHT AND NORMAL I AM!? OH BOY I SURE DO LOVE WOMEN!" to everyone he meets. He's identified The Womenz as the cure for his insecurity, even though he doesn't actually seem that invested and is honestly surprisingly chaste. He's just performing masculinity, hoping he'll get an A+ grade in Manliness and that maybe that will finally give him value as a person.

For as much as I dunk on Desuhiko, this is a fairly good commentary on what a patriarchal and heteronormative society does to insecure boys.

But then we have Yakou. He offers the counterpoint, as a more positive portrayal of masculinity. But. Like. His central thesis isn't that different from Desuhiko's. He's a romantic at heart who's central thesis is that the true measure of a man is defined by his relationship to a woman.

He's the heteronormative ideal: A man who controls his emotions, loves with all his heart, objectifies women to demonstrate a healthy sexuality but is committed in his heart of hearts to this one woman, who he would give his life for without question. He would be happily married with a white picket fence and 2.5 kids if not for this one asshole who stole his woman from him.

The moments where you're meant to roll your eyes and chuckle at Desuhiko are when he's trying to express masculinity. And the moments where you're meant to like Yakou are, similarly, moments when he's successfully expressing masculinity.

But the values he expresses in those moments? The things that come out of his mouth that are meant to make you appreciate him more? They're things like "Men exist just for women" and "You'd be prettier if you smiled more", confidently asserted in what's supposed to be a touching moment of emotionally connecting with the player character and, by extension, the player.

Most of the time when I'm dunking on Yakou, it's just for fun. He's far from my favorite character but he's harmless, and there are things I do enjoy about him. But the moments Kodaka writes when he's trying to make Yakou look good are the times when I can't fucking stand him at all.

[kittensartswriting]

Happy STS! I hope you’ve had a good week :) What is something about your WIP that’s either on your mind lately or that you wish more people would ask you about?

Hi! Happy STS!

I haven't been writing in several months (I've needed to focus on uni), so I have been mainly thinking about worldbuilding. For a while now I've been quite obsessed with figuring out the fashion in far too much detail. It's honestly not that important for the story, but I love dress history so it's just extremely fun for me to come up with a hundreds if not thousands of year of fashion evolution for almost a whole continent. Figuring out Ahinian fashion has been most interesting and hardest part too, because I'm trying to base it less on anything historical and more trying to come up with something different.

I can best figure visual things like fashion out by drawing it, so I started with the royal siblings, Agrippa and Manoheahpi. Here they are showing of court fashions. Black, dark blue, white and yellow are colors of the moon cult and their clan, which is the head of the moon cult. Agrippa is wearing a formal gown and a headdress of the heiress. The extreme sleeves and the ribbon skirt are part of the formal court dress. Manoheahpi is dressed in a casual outdoorsy aristocratic men's dress. He is a sage, hence the tattoos.

I think it's very interesting to figure out gendered clothing because it reveals so much about the gender construction and gender roles of a society. Ahinians have technically five genders, voasin - a woman, deavin - a man, vašáin - a third and separate gender category, voasdár - afab or intersex person, who lives as a man (-dár is masculine suffix), and deavnei - amab or intersex person, who lives as a woman (-nei is correspondingly a feminine suffix). In their culture gender is less defined by the body and more defined by the spirit. Their society is not entirely egalitarian though (even if more egalitarian than your typical patriarchal binary society), since their society is theocratic and gender essentialist, not in biological way but spiritual way. Therefore magic is very gendered. They are matriarchal so women hold most of the political power. This is reflected in dress - upper class fashions are more feminine coded, lower class fashions more masculine coded, and religious attires are vašáin coded because they are traditionally sages. In more formal setting aristocratic men too wear long gowns, and lower class women also wear shorter gowns.

I'm still figuring out the details of vašáin dress, clothing of lower classes and ceremonial dress. But I do know that very warm layered clothing is considered finer and more upper class, since the climate is very cold and the upper classes live in large castles, which can't be warmed to very comfortable temperatures. On the other hand lower classes live in small log cottages that are filled with hot smoke that even in very low temperatures keep the cottages in near 30C temperatures, so their indoors clothing are basically one layer, which they see as underwear. So even in hot summer upper classes dress in a lot of layers for formal occasions, the layers are then just thin and made of silk, linen and/or nettle. They don't wear crowns, but they wear elaborate hair jewelry indoors (with caps when it's cold indoors too) and elaborate hats outdoors. Lower classes also wear more toned down and more practical hair jewelry, but mostly caps and hats.

Also this all applies only in the agricultural area, which is along the Vuolhú river (the area marked in the map). The societal structures are very different outside it (so most of the country) where agriculture is not possible and people are herders and hunter-gatherers and quite nomadic. Population density is quite expectedly much higher in the agricultural area, so people wise, it's most of the country.

[sellouttoyourself]

There’s this part in Giovanni’s Room where David describes trans women/crossdressers he sees at a gay bar as “grotesque” and compares his disgust towards them to the disgust of watching a monkey eat it’s own feces because, as he puts it, the grossest part of the latter is seeing something human (like you) behave in a disgusting manner. I’m trying to get better at reparative readings and set aside paranoid readings, so let’s unpack this for a second. David is the epitome of a self-hating gay man, and the novel itself is plainly about how society teaches gay people to hate themselves. So what he finds so grotesque about trans people isn’t trans people in an of themselves but what they remind David about himself. Trans people are this funhouse mirror to David, a warped reflection of what he’s terrified he actually is. He sees trans people as visible mockery of his own failure to perform the masculinity demanded by his overbearing father and society at large, that if he’s in this club with people like *that* it must mean he is *of* them and similarly absurd in their aesthetic.  David takes the disgust and rage he feels about himself and his own sexuality and enacts it against these trans women as emblems of everything he despises about himself. Which is strange, because so many DL men do that to the gay men and trans women in their lives. Trans women are most likely to be killed by a domestic partner--someone they had a pre-existing relationship with. I’ve read enough testimonies from men put on trial for murders of trans women to know they usually took out their fear on these women. Not the fear of “gay panic” upon learning the woman they suspected was cis was actually trans; more often than not they knew their victim was trans and likely sought them out as a romantic partner or sex worker because of it. What often precedes the murder is a fear of *other people* learning their partner was trans or they were partners with a trans person. Their violence is an embodiment of their own shame for wanting what society tells them they should never want, and the trans woman herself becomes a threat to their masculinity even when desired for their femininity. Violence, as gendered violence so often does, then becomes the means of recapturing the masculinity they feel is at risk.  When I first read David’s derisive description of these trans people, my instict was to shelve the book and decry Baldwin as yet another great author who gave into their worst impulses and failed to learn their own lessons when it came to trans people. But the more I thought about it. the more I saw the value in these expressions of David’s insecurity.  This vision of transphobia--visceral disgust at the appearance of a trans person--is harder to come by than it must have been in 1954, but it remains the atomic unit of transphobia. The impulse to erase us from public life is based in this gut-level rejection that David puts forward, one which rejects not transness per se but what transness reveals about the observer.  For most, what we reveal is a sense of instability to a world they thought they knew. Gender is baked into the rules so many build their lives around. The cringey couple throwing a gender reveal party isn’t doing so because they hate trans people; they’re doing it because they’re excited about this little life they’re bringing into the world and are eager to “learn” more about them and what to expect. Whether the cake contains pink or blue batter reveals, to their eye, a lot about who their child will and can be. That’s no small matter! Trans people, by virtue of our very existence, destabilize the certainty that surrounds that joy. Truly, we destabilize the certainty that surrounds a lot of misery as well--misogyny, gender roles gendered violence, and much more. But people, generally speaking, abhor freedom, most of all that freedom that leads to uncertainty in an area where they could previously sleep soundly. The impulse to deride us is learned, surely, but not simply by poor representation of trans people as people. It is learned by making people dependent on the gender binary--a constructed, fragile mess to which people are nonetheless loyal as hell. I knew this. What I’d considered less often was how frequently trans people represent for cis people their own failures to live up to the gendered expectations they navigate. David has a deep-seated fear of being feminized, of losing his own masculinity to the love he feels for other men. Instead of seeing the potential in trans lives to separate masculinity from sexuality, he sees us as sad reminders of how he fails the former because of how the latter manifests for himself.  I don’t think this kind of fear is limited, however, to closet cases like David. I think lots and lots of cis, straight people reject trans people because of how we amplify their own failures to perform their gender identity “correctly” and the absurd, even grotesque, steps they take to avoid that failure. A few weeks ago some cis female writer went on Tucker Carlson and mocked Dylan Mulvaney, calling her performance of femininity a kind of minstrelsy--”womanface” as akin to blackface. This was odd to me, since she was literally on cable news while saying this, so was almost certainly plastered in a full face of makeup. She was donning more artifice than Dylan was, most likely, but shaming Dylan for how hers was made more apparent when contrasted with her assigned male gender. The disgust she was voicing is not terribly different from the disgust David expresses in Giovanni’s Room, one of anger at what Dylan reveals about herself as a woman--the effort and performance and costume and habits. Consciously or no, she sees herself in Dylan--even if it’s a kind of joyful embrace of femininity she killed long ago or to which she feels entitled by virtue of her biology and gender assignment. 

[rivangel]

Regarding your latest addition to Levi’s character analysis— um. HELLO??????? You CANT say Levi crossdresses and not follow up on that

What does he like to wear? Something fancy (dresses)? something more casual (only skirts?)? Would he consider wearing heels? Maybe some sort of wig? (His short hair with a nice dress would be so cute, though 🥹)

When did he begin considering crossdressing? Or did it just come naturally to him?

I NEED ANSWERS

kfkskgkskgks ID BE HAPPY TO ELABORATE

- we see in canon levi usually wears (1) formal shirts/slacks or (2) loose-fitting androgynous long sleeves and pants. so in public, no, but he rocks the occasional blouse / v-neck.

(modern au levi and women’s skinny jeans btw)

ehh any way you slice it he doesn’t know how to express himself, so he has no style (but no harm no foul baby is trying his best he looks great).

- but it’s not like Levi has any internal harmful notions about gender roles and such. the life he’s lived, he doesn’t have the energy to care what society (especially aboveground society) wants him to be like.

he’s just acutely aware that those roles/expectations do exist, so—like just about everything else…—he keeps his personal preferences and the reasons to himself.

- Levi doesn’t go to brothels for traditional reasons. but i think his relationship with them is more nuanced than avoiding them entirely, especially since it’s impossible to separate them from his mother and the moments his childhood was happy.

in some low moments he’ll to go to a brothel and pay, but just to lounge and talk. or listen to the woman he’s meeting talk. there’s one he calls a friend (and maybe 1 or 2 others he sees) but doesn’t know much on a meaningful level. it’s just nice. the smell of the perfume, gentle silk and thin cotton, a soft feminine voice, being able to lay his head in her lap, etc.

it’s the mommy issues for sure… but he’s also the most comfortable like this, in this company.

(i realize this doesn’t really have to do with crossdressing but im not deleting it😭)

- levi is good at makeup anyway (made a post about this…), so he sometimes dabbles in a little subtle styles, like dark thin eyeliner. it’s very rare for him to do a full face, but he feels if it’s subtle enough, he’ll leave HQ like that.

- as for "sexy" clothes (specifically kneesocks, sheer panties, thigh-highs w/ garters) he's hesitantly into it. it's really hard for him to separate the negative associations with his past and these clothes.

but he would put them to use iykwim. but only after an extremely long period of time would he share it with his partner, and even longer than that he might use them with his partner

- he's a casual dress person for sure (and not very showy). not a fan of a bunch of bright colors and puffy fabric, certainly not the types of dresses that are a process to get into like ballgowns (especially in the time of aot where those metal frames would be used). he doesn't like to show skin either.

the flowing dresses, the ones that sway around his knees/calves, the ones with BUTTERFLY SLEEVES or ANGEL SLEEVES. and kimonos.

(like this) (and this) (AND THIS)

he looks good in literally everything tho.

- on sight alone he'd pass for a pretty woman too rfherigeirug (not his intention, but whatever👍 he would think)

- maybe perhaps on the off chance, he might go to a casual evening event in civilian garb in a long-sleeve dress and black tights.

- his favorite color is white but he doesn't want to get his dresses dirty :( like at all :( like he's way more adamant about this than normal, even.

- it's cold at night but not cold enough for pants? kneesocks lol

- not into jewelry much at all, but he wouldn't not, for like an afternoon. his preference would be rings (partly because it'd be a nice weapon what with his familiarity with brass knuckles lol)

- acts annoyed and says it's soo dumb if his partner puts a tiara on his head, he looks stupid with it on, etc. would wear it the rest of the night tho. (((in private))))

and he’d be so pretty :3

- he doesn't mind his height much, but he would experiment with 1 (one) pair of heels. it's either kitten heels or platforms with no in-between.

- Levi doesn't hate his body lol, but he doesn't like it either?

but, he can learn to kind of like his naturally feminine features because they remind him of his mother. like his slender hands, his waist, and narrow shoulders.

- for season 4, Levi's hair was almost made to be longer (link). and if this were the case, he'd wear it down from time to time. a high ponytail, pin his bangs back with a pretty beret (like this), and/or tie a small braid on the side :3

- he wouldn’t be into wigs? even with a hat/ he’d be itchy and feel stuffy under there. plus he’s happy with his hair as-is

- cross dressing for him was like a snowballing that started with buying perfume and looking at blouses in storefronts until he just realized one day while brushing his fingers over a dress hanging up on his closet door that this is seriously abnormal lol.

- but he wouldn’t put effort into hiding it from himself. it’s not hurting anyone, no one knows whom he doesn’t trust with the information, and life is too short to be concerned with being a man wearing women’s clothes

- all of this considered Levi is a fashion trendsetter regardless of gender

[pocketsizedowls]

One of the most important characteristics of Mizuki Akiyama is her love of cute things.

Unlike many teenage girls who, by her age, may feel embarrassed about their passion for the color pink or kawaii culture, she thrives as a "girly girl," a teenage representative of the latest fashion trends and make-up products. She is cheerful and artistic, sensitive and kind. If we lived in a world where gender roles and binaries are less rigid, perhaps she wouldn't struggle so much under the glare of society's hefty expectations. I think of her all the time because I know her story well.

Mizuki is just like my brother, who used to sneak into my closet as a young boy to try on my church dresses. My brother, who shed hot tears when my father forced him to cut off his long hair. My brother, who went off to college and at long last, started wearing make-up to school and dancing in a cheer team full of girls who claimed him as one of their own. He has never been this happy, and I am grateful for his happiness and for his femininity, because my mother loves buying me dresses I'll never wear and make-up I'll never use. If I give them to him, I used to tell myself, I'll do a good deed. And, most importantly, I'll no longer have to worry about being a "good enough woman," both for my mother and for society at large.

According to American theorist Judith Butler, gender is a performance. To put it simply, gender is a book of rules, a game of chess, and all people should think twice about their gender and the hoops they jump through to fulfill those roles before they claim to be, for a lack of a better word, gendered the way they were assigned to be. As a glum teenager, I watched girls around me blossom into women, and while I identified with some aspects of girlhood (i.e. crying over a boy, trading secrets at the playground, and braiding each other's hair), I never aspired towards womanhood. Or femininity, really. It wasn't until I got older, after years of settling into a nonbinary lesbian identity, that I finally picked up a foundation brush and put on a skirt. Because by then, those things are just cute and beautiful to me, instead of womanly and intimidating.

I wish I could shout this from the rooftop. That I am free, and so many people should be, too.

Mizuki is just Mizuki, because gender is a friend to meet and a thing to love instead of an obligation to fulfill or a monster to defeat. Much like Tsukasa Tenma, who shines on a stage and carries that spark with him everywhere, gender is supposed to be euphoric. It's Mizuki, when she finishes sewing a new dress. It's my brother, when he puts on heels that actually accommodate his shoe size. It's me, when people call me "they" instead of "she," a "lovely person" instead of an "anxious girl."

I don't exactly know how Mizuki identifies or what her true pronouns are, but what I do know is that she is allowed to take her time. She is young, she is loved, and she is not a freak. If you are trans or nonbinary or anywhere under the umbrella, you are also not a freak. You can also take your time, then stomp your feet like a toddler when the world angers you because transphobic people are everywhere, and America seems especially fond of passing anti-trans registrations these days. Which goes to show, perhaps, that you are a miracle. And despite how lonely being a trans person can be, you're survival gives everyone else in the community hope and strength to keep going.

For some trans anger, I recommend you listen to Teniwoha's Villain, sung by Mizuki and Mafuyu. The lyrics are truly awesome.

For some trans hope, I recommend Toa's ID Smile, sung by all the N25 girls. The background of the 3D MV is so beautiful and relevant.

[starlene]

Layers of symbolism in Barbie (2023)

I’ve seen Barbie twice now, and I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about the symbolism in the story. It’s a lot!

So, I wrote a breakdown.

Barbie (the character)’s story

In Barbie’s story…

👠 Barbieland symbolizes girlhood, childhood, innocence, immaturity, and naivety.

👟 The Real World symbolizes womanhood, adulthood, growing older and more mature, and becoming a fully realized human. It also symbolizes accepting the inevitability of change, aging, and death.

🏢 Mattel symbolizes society in general, and men in particular, telling women how to live their lives.

✂ Weird Barbie is an example of a woman who does not look and do as she is told. For that, other Barbies have punished her by calling her names and pushing her aside – so at first, Barbie is terrified of becoming like her. At the same time, Weird Barbie is a wise female mentor who helps Barbie along on her journey.

→ For Barbie, moving to The Real World means she is free of the expectations Mattel, and people in general, put on Barbie dolls: she doesn’t have to be perfect or only dress in pink and pastels anymore. No one can put her into a box anymore.

→ At the same time, Barbie leaving her hyper-feminine aesthetic behind when she leaves Barbieland for good symbolically connects that aesthetic with childhood and immaturity. In turn, her more subdued costume in the last scene of the movie symbolically connects that aesthetic to adulthood and maturity.

→ Moving to The Real World is a positive change for Barbie: she becomes more mature and learns to appreciate the beauty in aging. However, I think it’s noteworthy how the movie mostly shows The Real World in a negative light: while in The Real World, Barbie gets disappointed, harassed, and chased down, and all of this makes her experience anxiety for the first time.

→ In the end, Barbie can’t stay in Barbieland because she’s grown too mature for it, showing that it’s impossible to escape growing up – even when the world of grown-ups seems very chaotic and unfair. Becoming a woman means you have to encounter, and learn to deal with, toxic masculinity and the patriarchy.

Ken (the character)’s story

In Ken’s story…

🕺 Ken himself symbolizes a young, immature man who hasn’t found his place within society and who has a very low self-confidence. Instead of placing value on himself and his inherent qualities, he has tied his whole sense of self-worth to Barbie’s approval. As a group, Kens are oppressed within Barbieland.

💃 Barbie symbolizes an idealized image of a perfect girlfriend. At the same time, she is someone who inadvertently hurts Ken because she doesn’t understand her own privileged position within their society. As a group, Barbies are the oppressors within Barbieland.

👠 Barbieland symbolizes oppression, marginalization, and social exclusion. For Ken, it’s a society that has no place for him or people like him.

👟 The Real World symbolizes patriarchy, which Ken interprets to mean a society where things are better for Kens than they are in Barbieland. (In truth, as Ken grows to learn, it’s a system that harms all genders with its strict and oppressive gender roles.)

🐎 Horses symbolize all the positive, joyous, healthy, harmless, non-toxic parts of masculinity.

→ In short, Ken’s story is about a young man falling into the manosphere, and how good self-confidence and supportive connections with other men can help battle toxic masculinity.

→ Just like Barbie, Ken too matures during the course of his character arc: he acknowledges that he’s been wrong about the patriarchy, he starts to feel a sense of self-worth that’s not tied to Barbie, and he learns to lean on other Kens for support.

→ Unlike Barbie, though, Ken remains in Barbieland at the end of the movie, and presumably starts working together with other Kens and Barbies to shape it into a more equal society. This is because to Ken, Barbieland does not symbolize childhood like it does to Barbie, so he doesn’t have to leave it behind when he grows up.

→ When you think about Barbie as a part of Ken’s story, it feels disappointing that when they arrive in The Real World and Barbie experiences the way real women are mistreated, she doesn’t seem to make much of a connection to the way Barbies mistreat Kens in Barbieland. This is, again, because The Real World symbolizes different things to Barbie and Ken.

→ Unfortunately, all too often, the joyous parts of masculinity become tied together with sexism and toxic ideas. The way horses are often seen as a girly thing in our modern-day culture underlines how ridiculous this is: Ken assumes horses and the patriarchy go together and gets into both, though actually, they have nothing to do with each other. In reality, Ken just wants to enjoy the majesty of horses – that is, the positive parts of his own masculinity.

Barbie <3 Ken

👫 The relationship between Barbie and Ken symbolizes heteronormativity and amatonormativity, and the way those concepts are forced down all our throats practically from toddlerhood.

→ Barbie and Ken are not in a real relationship with each other. At the start of the movie, they’re both too immature to understand what being in a relationship means – let alone if they really want that for themselves and each other.

→ Ken is in love with an idealized image of Barbie he has created in his mind. He tries to play the part of a perfect boyfriend, though he doesn’t really know or understand what being a boyfriend entails.

→ Barbie, in turn, is not romantically interested in Ken at all.

→ Despite all this, people (and even Barbie and Ken themselves) expect Barbie and Ken to be together. Notably, the Mattel CEO thinks that Barbie’s ending is that she is in love with Ken, even though there has been literally no evidence in the entire movie that this is the case.

From a female point of view

To the human characters Gloria and Sasha, and also to many real women watching the movie…

👭 Barbies symbolize idealized, stereotypical, perfect femininity.

👠 Barbieland symbolizes girlhood, childhood, imagination, and fun. It’s a thought experiment; a safe haven reminiscent of the innocence of childhood; a place where women can be whatever they want while looking and acting unashamedly feminine.

👟 The Real World is a place where the idealized femininity of Barbies and Barbieland is unobtainable. For many women, instead of being a source of inspiration, idealized depictions of womanhood turn into a burden, something that restricts and disheartens women instead of uplifting them.

Barbieland

👠 Apart from its role in the arcs of individual characters, Barbieland is an exaggerated mirror image of the real world we live in. It’s a joke that criticizes the gender inequality of our world – and as such, it acknowledges that one gender holding power over others is not a good thing.

→ Somewhat confusingly, it’s treated as a victory when Barbies take Barbieland back from Kens – even though that means returning to the unequal matriarchy, not becoming a truly equal society.

→ This is because in Barbie (the character)’s story and to Gloria and Sasha, instead of being a symbol of an unequal society, Barbieland symbolizes girlhood innocence and unabashed femininity. The Barbies, Gloria and Sasha take the joy they feel in their girlhood and femininity back from the patriarchy, which is certainly a feat worth celebrating!

Mattel (the fictional version of the company)

Finally, from the fictional Mattel board of directors’ point of view…

👠 Barbieland is a reflection of their Barbie brand and products, though it’s also shaped by the people who buy Barbies and play with them.

👭 Barbies are a way of making money. Because of that, the executives think they have to be perfectly beautiful and, thus, marketable. Notably, the Mattel CEO doesn’t like Gloria’s idea of a Normal Barbie – until he’s shown evidence that it will make Mattel loads of money, which causes him to immediately change his mind.

✂ Weird Barbie shows the way many children really play with Barbies. Rough play is not in line with Mattel’s pristine brand for Barbie, so Weird Barbie is pushed aside in Barbieland.

→ Barbieland is the way that it is partially because that’s how Mattel has designed it, partially because that’s how the girls who play with Barbies want it. For example, Kens are oppressed because no one likes to play with Kens as much as they like playing with Barbies, and thus, Mattel also puts less resources in designing and marketing them.

→ Somewhat confusingly, this connection goes both ways: the things that happen in Barbieland also affect the things that Mattel does. For example, when Ken redecorates Barbie’s Dreamhouse so it becomes Ken’s Mojo Dojo Casa House, Mattel’s factory starts producing Mojo Dojo Casa Houses in The Real World. What is that all about??

~

This is all I can think of right now. Let me know if you’ve interpreted something differently, or if you think I’ve missed something!