#without putting herself in (perceived) danger

[marvelousazula]

I will need a gifset of all times Agatha "I have zero fucks to give and I don't care at all about anyone" Harkness being a protective little witch.

[wolfeyedwitch]

Me: and then this will happen, and my character will do this altruistic action—

My writing brain: she would not fuckin do that.

Me: well damn, you're right, she definitely would not do that. Well, I guess she gets to panic and hide and have a crisis about how she's not a good person!

Writing original fiction is a lot like writing fan fiction, except instead of reading someone else's work and thinking "that character would not fuckin do that" you're reading and judging your own work, and thinking "this character would not fuckin do that", because they're your characters, who have gone off and started misbehaving.

[zaczenemiji]

absolutely no rush if you're occupied with other asks :D!! I love your writing so so much your descriptions and dialogue are so good 😭💓 could I possibly request a scenario where the reader (working alongside kenji as ultraman/on the sidelines as a civilian, whatever you desire!!) unexpectedly throws herself in front of kenji and takes a hit for him (bonus points of they had unresolved tension before [argument, interrupted confession, one character was sick and rejecting help etc etc; no pressure at all and pls write whatever you'd like i'm just throwing out random suggestions!!]) + the hurt/comfort to follow after? thank you so much! ☺️ i wish you the best!

In the Heart of Danger

Kenji Sato x Reader

Synopsis: As tensions between Kenji and the KDF rise, you become entangled in the conflict, leading to a dangerous confrontation that puts your life at risk.

Word Count: 2,710

Genre/Warning: Action, Angst, Drama, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, Sacrifice, Violence

Author’s Note: Slight mention of themes from Too Good, Too True

MASTERLIST

For many years, Ultraman and the Kaiju Defense Force worked in harmony. But as KDF evolved under different leadership, so did its philosophy. Their arsenal grew more lethal, their strategies more aggressive. Dr. Onda's vision was clear: the complete eradication of all kaiju was the only path to true safety.

Ultraman held a different perspective. Those magnificent creatures had their own place in the natural order. He believed in protecting life; only fending them off to prevent destruction, not to annihilate them.

KDF’s methods became increasingly ruthless. Where Ultraman sought balance, KDF saw only the necessity of total elimination. The final straw came when KDF started viewing Ultraman's reluctance to kill as a liability, a hindrance to their ultimate goal of eradication.

Thus, the Kaiju Defense Force turned their attention to identifying Ultraman's human form, intent on neutralizing this perceived threat.

"Kenji, you can't keep dismissing this," you said, frustration lacing your voice. "The KDF is closing in on you. They know something's up, and they're not going to stop until they confirm you're Ultraman."

The evening air was thick with tension as you and Kenji sat across from each other in his house. It started with a simple disagreement but it had escalated so quickly.

Kenji ran a hand through his hair, his expression one of exasperation. "I know the risks, (y/n),” he replied. “But I can handle it. I've been doing this for a while now."

"Handling it?" you echoed, incredulous. "You've barely been able to stay one step ahead of them. They've got advanced technology, Kenji. They're not just going to give up."

You remember the incidents with Gigantron, how KDF was willing to get rid of Ultraman, so as to obtain Emi. And for what reasons? To use a frikking baby to lead them to Kaiju Island—to massacre, for the mass murder of those misunderstood creatures.

Kenji sighed heavily, his eyes meeting yours with a mix of determination and fatigue. "I can't stop,” he said. “If I don't transform, people will die."

"I'm not asking you to stop," you said, your voice softening. "I'm asking you to be more careful—to consider the danger you're putting yourself in."

Kenji's jaw tightened and he looked away, the weight of your words settling heavily on his shoulders, “I know you're worried about me. But I can't just sit back and do nothing."

"Then let me help," you pleaded, reaching out to touch his arm. "We're a team, remember? You don't have to do this alone."

"I can't put you in danger, too,” he pulled away slightly, his expression hardening. “It's bad enough that I have to deal with this. I don't want you getting hurt because of me."

"Kenji," you said, your voice firm. "I'm already involved. Whether you like it or not, I'm in this with you. And I'm not just going to stand by and watch you risk your life without doing anything."

He shook his head, his frustration evident. "You don't understand,” he said. “If something happened to you... I wouldn't be able to live with myself."

"And what about me?" You shot back, your eyes filling with tears. "Do you think I could live with myself if something happened to you, and I did nothing to stop it?"

There came a long silence.

He never asked for any of this—you know that firsthand. You didn’t want this either. Only a fool would want to throw away the peaceful life they had in LA, away from the chaos, the danger, and the constant fear of losing their beloved.

But when Emi came and when Kenji reconnected with his dad, you both understood. Ultraman is a vital element, the pinnacle of balance, the one that would keep the world in its equilibrium.

He who holds the scale holds the lives of many. He who carries the burden also carries fear. And with it, the sacrifices to ensure the collective safety of humanity.

Your tears spilled over, and you wiped them away angrily. "You're an idiot, Kenji,” you said. “A noble, self-sacrificing idiot. But I'm not going to let you do this alone. Whether you like it or not, I'm going to help you. And you're just going to have to deal with that."

"No. You don't get it,” Kenji's expression hardened again. “This isn't about what you want. It's about keeping you safe."

"And what if I don't want to be safe?” You demanded, your voice breaking. “What if I want to be there for you?"

"That's not your choice to make!" Kenji shouted, his frustration boiling over. "I can't lose you, (y/n)!”

"And I can't lose you either!" you screamed back. "Why can't you see that?"

Kenji's eyes flashed with anger. "You should have just stayed in LA!" he snapped, his voice cutting through the night. "You're becoming too nosy, and it's dangerous. I can't have you getting involved in this.”

You stared at him, stunned. Kenji never hurt you in any way, especially not physically. But the weight of his words hit you like a punch to the gut.

Without another word, you turned and stormed off, your heart pounding in your chest. You didn't look back, even as the tears blurred your vision.

Kenji stood to follow. But with the way you ran away, he knew you didn’t need him at the moment. Still, he worried for your safety. Quickly, he rode his motorcycle and followed you quietly from a distance to ensure you reached home safely.

Everything that unfolded hurt Kenji as much as it did you, if not more. This was the time he finally truly understood his father—why he let them move to LA, why he had to endure the pain of being separated—all because he wanted them safe.

Kenji loves you more than anything, more than you ever knew. He loved you enough to have the resolve to let you go if you finally wanted to be out of all this. You deserved the best, better than a complicated life with him.

When he had seen to it that you’re home safely, he stayed in front of your house a little longer, wanting to be there in case you needed him.

You knew what he was doing. You knew that he was following you. And you were grateful, truly grateful, that he didn’t let you be out here alone. He understood the space you needed and he respected it. This was just one of the infinite reasons you love him so much.

When you arrived home, you sat by the door, leaning on it as you let your tears flow freely down your cheeks. Kenji is a hero, and heroes need saving, too. You wanted to be the one to do that.

Little did you know, you were already doing so. You didn’t know how much you were saving him by being there for him. You have been doing so since day one—since meeting you in LA, losing his mom, coming back to Japan, raising Emi, and fully accepting his role as Ultraman.

Your eyelids became so heavy from all the tears that you didn’t notice that you’d drifted off to a nap. You were awakened by the sound of Kenji’s motorcycle engine as he started it.

You stood to take a peek through your window, careful not to let him see you. He looked your way one last time before driving off into the night.

When he was out of sight, you decided to head on over to your bed but before you could do so, you heard the mechanical sounds of drones.

Your eyes widened as you quickly looked back to see KDF’s drones heading in the direction Kenji went to. With a gasp, you hurriedly slammed the door open and ran out, forgetting about the identical watch you had with Kenji that was repeatedly beeping with an alert of a kaiju attack.

You ran as fast as you could, following the drones as you were sure that they were after Kenji. Suddenly, you heard familiar screams in the distance as the neighborhood awoke to a mundane scene of a kaiju attack.

You looked to your hand only to see an empty wrist. You groaned to yourself, of all the times you could forget it, why now?

Despite being unaware of what was happening or which kaiju was it this time, still you followed the drones. Upon turning the corner, you saw Kenji parking his motorcycle aside so he could transform.

However, this time, KDF came prepared. A squadron of heavily armed soldiers arrived, their weapons calibrated to disrupt his transformation sequence.

As the soldiers closed in on Kenji, one of them set up a cannon, aiming it directly at him. Realizing the gravity of the situation, you sprinted toward the scene, your heart pounding in your chest.

The targeting system locked onto Kenji's energy signature, and the barrel began to glow with a blue hue, signaling the impending shot. Just as the operator pulled the trigger, you threw yourself in front of Kenji.

The concentrated beam of energy hit you with full force, sending a searing pain through your body. You screamed as it disrupted your bio-energy field, causing immediate paralysis and intense agony. You collapsed to the ground, feeling your strength drain away.

The soldiers, momentarily stunned by your intervention, hesitated as Kenji caught you in his arms. "No, (y/n)!" Kenji's voice was filled with anguish as he held you close.

The effects of the cannon had taken their toll on you, but your selfless act had given Kenji the precious seconds he needed. He transformed into Ultraman with a flash of light, creating a barrier to protect you from further harm.

With the kaiju approaching the city, Ultraman's form loomed large, and the soldiers were forced to retreat, their weapons ineffective against his fully transformed state.

Although hesitant he had to make a heart-wrenching decision to choose between being your lover and being Ultraman.

He carried you as gently as he could. In the palm of his hand, your fragile body lay unconscious. He quickly ran back home where Mina awaited him.

Upon arriving, he carefully placed you in the bed Mina took out of the house. “Mina! Emergency analysis, please!” He begged. “Call my dad, do everything to save her! I’ll be back as soon as I can!”

With that, he dashed off to the scene of the kaiju attack. His mind was a mess as he fended it off as quickly as he could, even if it meant hurting it unintentionally, and even if it caused more infrastructural damage.

Ultraman’s heart pounded as he rushed home, the streets blurring past him in a haze of worry and exhaustion. As he reached the familiar door, he transformed back to his human form.

Kenji burst into the house. The scene before him made his heart ache even more. You lay unconscious on the couch, pale and still, with Mina and his father sitting beside you, their faces etched with concern.

Hayao looked up as his son entered. "Kenji," he said, his voice a mix of relief and sorrow. "You're back."

Kenji dropped to his knees beside you, his hand gently brushing a strand of hair from your face. "What happened? How is she?" he asked, his voice breaking.

Mina spoke up. “KDF used a new weapon, something we haven't seen before,” she started. “It emits a high-frequency pulse that disrupts the transformation process. When (y/n) threw herself in front of you, she took the full brunt of the attack."

Hayao nodded solemnly. "It's designed to incapacitate Ultraman before he can fully transform,” he said. “But on a human... it's much more dangerous. It's a miracle she's still alive."

Kenji's hands trembled as he held yours, his eyes never leaving your face. "Is there anything we can do?” He asked, tears racing their way out of his eyes. “Anything at all?"

"We've done what we can for now," Mina said softly. "She needs rest and time to recover. We'll monitor her closely. But Kenji... it's serious. The weapon has caused significant internal damage."

Hayao placed a reassuring hand on Kenji’s shoulder. "You did what you had to do, son. You saved countless lives tonight,” he said. “But we need to be prepared for what comes next. The KDF won't stop now that they know you're Ultraman."

Kenji nodded, his resolve hardening. "I'll protect her. I'll protect all of us,” he said through small sobs. “But right now... I need her to wake up. I need to know she's okay.”

As the night wore on, Kenji stayed by your side, holding your hand and whispering words of encouragement. He thought about all the times you had supported him, how you had insisted on helping despite the danger. The argument from earlier seemed trivial now, overshadowed by the reality of your sacrifice.

"Please wake up," Kenji murmured, his voice thick with emotion. "I'm so sorry. I should've listened to you. I should've protected you better."

The room was filled with the soft hum of medical equipment and Kenji’s quiet sobs that refused to give up on the person he cared about the most.

As the first light of dawn began to filter through the windows, Kenji felt a slight movement in your hand. His heart leaped, and he leaned closer, his eyes searching your face for any sign of awakening.

"(Y/n)?" he whispered, his voice trembling with hope. "Can you hear me?"

Your eyelids fluttered, and a faint groan escaped your lips. Slowly, you opened your eyes, blinking against the light. When you saw Kenji's worried face, a weak smile crossed your lips.

"Kenji..." you murmured, your voice barely audible. "You're okay..."

Kenji's eyes once again filled with tears as he nodded, his grip on your hand tightening, "Yeah, I'm okay. Thanks to you. You saved me, (y/n)."

You tried to sit up, but pain shot through your body, and you winced. “What... what happened?” You asked.

Mina quickly intervened, gently pushing you back down with mechanical hands that protruded out of her spherical body. "Don't try to move too much,” she said. “You were hit by a weapon KDF used. It was meant for Ultraman, but you took the hit instead."

Hayao added, "You were incredibly brave, (y/n). You saved Kenji's life."

You looked at Kenji, your eyes filled with concern. "I couldn't let them hurt you,” you said softly. “I had to do something."

Kenji leaned down, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. "And I promise, I'll never let anything happen to you again,” he said, his tears falling down on your face.

The days that followed were a blur of pain, recovery, and quiet moments shared between you and Kenji. True to his word, he never left your side, his worry and guilt evident in every action he took to ensure your comfort and healing.

Each morning, you woke to the smell of freshly brewed tea and the sight of Kenji bustling around the kitchen, preparing breakfast. Despite his own exhaustion, he insisted on doing everything himself.

"Good morning," he greeted softly one morning, bringing a tray of food to your bedside. "How are you feeling today?"

You offered a weak smile, propping yourself up on the pillows. "A little better, I think,” you answered. “Thanks, Kenji."

He set the tray down carefully. "You need to eat,” he said. “You've got to get your strength back."

In the afternoons, when you felt strong enough, Kenji would help you sit up and move around. He'd guide you outside to the lawn, where the sun's warmth and the gentle breeze seemed to hasten your healing. He'd support you with a gentle but firm grip.

"I don't want you to overdo it," he'd say, worry etched on his brow. "Just take it slow."

As the days turned into weeks, your strength gradually returned. The pain lessened, and the color began to return to your cheeks.

The days of your recovery were not just about healing physically but also about rebuilding and strengthening the trust and love between you and Kenji.

You had faced danger and come out stronger, more united. With each passing day, you became more sure than ever that together, your love could overcome anything.

Taglist is open! Comment if u wanna be tagged on future Kenji oneshots

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[nobodyfamousposts]

I remember seeing a post that said ‘Chat has to earn the right to hand out the miraculous’ but I never really understood what that meant? Like how would he ‘earn’ it?

First off, we’re approaching this from the wrong angle. I recall making a post about the issue of Adrien not getting to be the one to hand out Miraculous, but I’m pretty sure I said at the time that handing out the magic-granting world-altering jewelry wasn’t a “right“, it was a responsibility. No one has a “right” to the Miraculous whether it’s using them or choosing others to use them. That’s the sort of entitlement that got us Chloe and her downward spiral. Saying it’s a “right” is saying it’s based on what you perceive a person to deserve rather than what they are actually capable of handling. It’s a trap of thinking that someone “deserves” something so they are “owed“ that something, regardless of the reality of the situation. At the time, people were saying that Adrien “deserved” to be the one to hand out the magical jewelry—either alongside Marinette or from the general stance I saw from the people making that statement at the time, preferably in place of her.

The sad little meow meow may deserve happiness, but there’s nothing saying that happiness has to or even should come in the form of control over ancient magical jewelry and the gods within that can cause other people harm if the person involved is being irresponsible (like say using his partner’s Lucky Charm for a joke during a crisis when she was already on a time limit in Refleckdoll) or otherwise having a bad day and just not feeling like it (Catwalker).

As such, it’s not about Adrien needing to “earn the right” to hand out Miraculous to people of his choosing, it’s about him needing to show that he is responsible enough to make good choices regardless of his personal feelings and more importantly take accountability for his bad choices.

That is where we have the problem.

In Copycat, Adrien caused an akuma by lying to a guy about dating Ladybug. While he did try to solve the situation himself, he took no accountability in the process and his attempts to catch his double really came off more as his way of hiding what he did rather than trying to fix it. Especially since the episode ended with Ladybug taking the blame and apologizing to the victim for something that wasn’t her fault. At no point did Adrien admit what actually happened, and the truth never came out.

In Oblivio, he cost his, Marinette’s, AND the kwamis’ memories because he was messing around and flirting in the middle of the fight. We literally see in the clip that he is lounging behind Ladybug while she is desperately trying to deflect the blasts by herself to protect them both.

In Papa Garou, he is again flirting with Ladybug and distracting her in the middle of a fight when she is a little busy trying to stop the akuma from crushing a building. A building and specifically the bedroom of a friend of his whom he supposedly cares about and that he has no way of knowing isn’t in there being crushed to death by the akuma he was ignoring.

In Glaciator, he got mad at Ladybug for not showing up to a date she herself told him she likely would not make, and took such offense that he refused to work with her in the middle of an active crisis. Second verse same as the first in Frozer as he again put his personal feelings first and refused to work with her in a crisis because she wouldn’t give him the answer he wanted. Both times, she had to be the one to apologize to him for upsetting him, and he took no personal accountability for letting his own feelings dictate his actions in the middle of dangerous situations.

He followed Volpina without hesitation even over his partner and disregarded her suspicions but attacked Alya as Scarabella without trying to listen.

In Syren, he threatened to quit at a time that Paris was flooded and people were drowning because he wasn’t being told a secret that Ladybug was not allowed to share. In Catwalker, he DID quit because Ladybug was relying on people who weren’t him at a time he was consistently letting his personal feelings prevent him from coming out to help.

He has repeatedly let his own personal feelings get in the way of helping during active crises. Crises that are the only reason he was given the magical jewelry in the first place. That tells me that he’s lacking responsibility and that the passing out of the magical jewelry is a desire for making him seem more important rather than a necessity for keeping the city he is supposed to protect safe.

I recall an analogy was made before that compared him to a lifeguard who refuses to go out in the water and help someone who’s drowning because he’s upset. And it is an apt comparison. It doesn’t matter that the lifeguard “needs” this job or “deserves” the benefit of the role; if the lifeguard is letting something personal interfere in his duty to the point he’s refusing to save a person in trouble whom it is his responsibility to help, then he shouldn’t be a lifeguard.

So you’re asking me how I think he would be able to earn the responsibility to hand out the Miraculous? It’s that he be responsible. 

Not blame or lecture Ladybug/Marinette. Not refuse to help because he’s mad. Not change his identity to get another chance at dating Ladybug. Not sacrificing his life or free will for the upteenth time and leaving his partner to fix everything on her own yet again.

At this point, he’s a good support and fighter, but he’s not someone I could trust to pick a good person to use a Miraculous responsibly and return it afterwards. Or take action if that person won’t.

Because that’s the thing! Adrien won’t just be responsible for himself here. He will also have to take responsibility for whomever he chooses AND whichever Miraculous he hands out AND whatever results from the situation.

He, as someone who is friends with a bully like Chloe and tries to support a liar like Lila, has a bad judge of character and that person runs off with a Miraculous? That’s going to be on him.

He chooses an ability for someone who can’t use it properly? That’s going to be on him.

The person he picks gets injured or dies? That’s going to be on him. 

The mix of person and Miraculous with the situation that he cannot control for results in a bigger mess? That’s going to be on him.

And no, we can’t say that it would just work out and that none of that would be an issue for Adrien. We already have the proof that he couldn’t handle it.

It’s already Canon that Adrien fell apart and got himself taken out immediately after he lost Ladybug in Party Crasher. He refused to listen to Fu or get help—which would have been a perfect time for him to display this responsibility and show he could gather and lead other heroes. He didn’t. Instead, he attacked an enemy he knew had a one-hit takeout ability head on in close combat in immediate range of that ability, got himself caught, and Fu had to step in and choose other heroes to help. You could say it’s because of his love for Ladybug blinding him or that he was enraged, both of which are problematic enough in and of themselves. But you could also say that he can’t handle the responsibility of dealing with the crisis himself.

Adrien is the “nice” guy. He’s the “funny” guy. He’s the guy who will support bullies like Chloe and help make her feel better after she tries to crash a train and takes over the city. I guess he’s good at making people feel good about bad things they did or bad situations they’re in. So he is a hero who can fight bad guys and make people feel better. He’s a feel-good hero and that’s why people love him.

But responsible he is not.

[guided-by-stars]

Everyone’s always talking about facades in ISAT. Loop’s facade weaving itself into their true self, Siffrin’s acting breaking down over hundreds of performances, how Isabeau uses masks to cover his insecurities. But not all facades are constructed purposefully and not all are so consciously maintained.

I think a lot of people underestimate Mirabelle. Both in our world, and in theirs. She’s very disarming, isn’t she? Anxious, biting her nails, conciliatory, kind, overly careful with others. The first member of the party, the protagonist, but always letting everyone but herself take the lead, except when dealing the final blow on the King. You’d be forgiven for thinking she’s shy. But she’s not, is she? She was given incredible responsibility by her mentor that could, by all her knowledge, be dead, and instead of crumpling under that pressure, like many might have, she seeks out the Defenders to ask for their help, and even after they deny her, she ventures out, with only one person by her side, unquestionably dedicated to her quest to save Vaugarde.

She’s incredibly brave! And smart too! It’s hard to stand out in that regard, when you’re traveling with a Researcher, head always buried in books, reached the age of 40, almost twice as long on this world as you have been, and a man who grew up the literal stereotype of a nerd, who still knows how to calculate numbers in his head in an instant as if it’s nothing, and this mysterious traveller who has been disarming all these traps for you and finding all these keys and has an incredible number of random skills and survived on his own for how many years? But Mirabelle is clever and perceptive! And the most emotionally intelligent and least repressed out of anyone there. She always notices when Siffrin is feeling awful and attempting to hide it. In Dormont, in Act 3, she asks if he’s okay, and when he says that he is, she straight up pushes back against it and says that she’s pretty sure that he’s lying about being fine. She’s aware that Siffrin has put up a wall, she just doesn’t like overstepping. If she was the type who didn’t care about pushing boundaries, she would have confronted him far before Act 5. And she knows how to do so many things!! She’s taken over a hundred classes. One thing about Mirabelle, is she’s absolutely ravenous to learn. Everything.

Sure, she holds some things back. She’s not open about how much responsibility she feels has been placed on her back, and is nervous about how others will perceive her lack of interest in dating, but overall, she’s far more open about her own feelings than anyone else in the party. When she’s anxious, she says it. When she needs help, she accepts it. Now this. Is crazy.

And then there’s her interest in the schadenfreude of it all. The morbid. Mild mannered Mirabelle loves seeing little guys being put through… the horrors. (Oh Mirabelle…you would love In Stars and Time) She has a collection of gory books in her bedroom, and takes the horror anthology into her pocket when you find it. Part of it is because seeing others in danger makes her aware of how safe she is by comparison, part of it is the catharsis, the emotional relief of seeing the Chase being fulfilled. But I think some of it is just fascination and curiosity. As mentioned earlier, she desires very deeply to Learn Everything. Learning how someone might be torn to bloody pieces by the Beast? Part of that.

Mirabelle is kind, sweet, and cute. Yes. But she is also incredibly capable, clever and perceptive, tremendously brave and courageous, and is fascinated with horror and gore and danger. When Euphrasie blessed her, said that she was the only person who could have done it, she was right. I feel like people in general are prone to flattening out optimistic and positive characters and seeing them as more shallow, while digging deeper into more negative and externally emotionally turbulent ones. Mirabelle is not shallow!!!

And all of that is said without any mention of her fixation on Changing!! I am going to explode!! This post is too long already but maybe I’ll make another one about her unhealthy fixation on always Changing and how that drives almost everything she does, both before and during the same!! It is so core to her psyche! Ahhh fantasy religion!!

[hiding-under-the-willow]

Could I ask for any and all info you have about ghosts!Gem?

(i'm so normal about her i promise)

I kind of imagine Gem coming from a high class family with just like a shit ton of brothers and some incredibly lenient parents. So she grows up a little rough, rowdy, and snarky. Her family does a lot of hunting, and so they own a lot of different hunting estates in different areas, including the property that she would later go on to haunt and Etho would go on to buy much later down the line. She's one of the best shots in the family, much to the jealousy of her brothers'. She dies in the 1890s in a hunting accident when one of her brothers shoots her in the back. Whether or not this was purely a true accident or a malicious act of some kind is up for debate. The property ends up essentially abandoned after that. I very much was thinking about Dorian Grey when I was brainstorming about her, hence the time period and hunting accident death and the uncertainty of the circumstances.

I imagine her being a little entitled and full of herself, but also easy to befriend. I imagine this is how she manages to win over Helsknight. He's an asshole but she manages to match and exceed his asshole energy so perfectly that he has to respect her, by the time she's living in the little cabin with him and starts actually being nice he's just in too deep to even register what's happened or when the change occured. What can I say maybe the confidence isn't unearned on her part.

I think after spending almost 100 years alone with Helsknight, who can be kind of dreary even after she manages to soften him a bit, she probably gets a little weird and obsessive about other people who come onto the property. Very much an embrace of change as opposed to Hels' stubborn clinging to the past. She'll just follow people around and talk to them and commentate on their actions, knowing full well they can't hear her. She's delighted when Cub dies and she finally has someone to bother besides Helsknight. She's equally delighted when Etho comes back able to see them, a delight that Etho is not fond of. She eventually wins him over the same way she did Hels, the queen of worming her way into people's good graces without them noticing. She also, maybe, gets a little bit too attached to the idea that people who have near death experiences involving ghosts end up being able to see them, especially after Grian and Joel come around and they realize the same thing had happened to Grian.

So, y’know, maybe she puts a little too much effort into playing cat and mouse with Joel, putting those old hunting skills to good use trying to find a way to /almost/ kill him so he could also see them and she could give him some of her much needed comentary on his perceived skills or lack thereof. She drags Hels into it a lot of the time since he has an ability to interact with the living world that she doesn't, and so honestly the fact that most of her plans fail is probably owed less to her skill as a hunter, or Joel's complete ability to walk out of dangerous situations unscathed and unbothered like a looney toons character, and more so to Hels own hesitance to be responsible for another near death experience on the property.

[vilecemetery]

other people have worded it better then me, but inej's assertion about having kaz in the without armor scene was clearly not just about emotional vulnerability. it’s a powerful line in the books and a nice metaphor for emotional intimacy, (something inej deserves from kaz) but let's not shy away from the fact that she also made it clear she meant physical intimacy, as her words were "fully clothed, gloves on, head turned away so our lips can never touch" 

this nuance is important to consider, as it reflects the depth and complexity of her feelings at the time. it’s ironic that for people who apparently care so much about inej’s boundaries, the fandom rarely pays attention to what she says. inej has flaws and virtues, some affected by different experiences she's had, and that affects her choices. her words aren’t any less hurtful because of this. she got kaz in a vulnerable moment and said something cruel. later she reflects on this and admits she shouldn’t be holding kaz to standards she can’t meet herself, and she likely said that to him in the first place because she lashed out about something that’s personally a trigger for her and she’s vulnerable about. they both have a lot of issues surrounding physical intimacy. 

that’s one reason why kanej is such a good ship- one of the most healthy, beautiful and nuanced relationships ever between two children who have been through horrific things, exploited, abandoned, and put in danger every day, who have found safety and friendship and understanding in each other. they aren’t going to be speaking super politely and using sensitive, respectful, inoffensive woke therapy speak at every second because that’s not their situation or their relationship and their interactions are raw and real. sometimes they make mistakes (kaz calling inej an investment, inej saying kaz wouldn’t be able to have her if he couldn’t touch her, etc) but they recognise and admit when they do and work through that. the beauty of their friendship lies in their imperfections and their capacity to learn from each other. the bare honesty they share is a testament to their growth, even when it leads to moments of pain or misunderstanding.

to suggest that holding inej to a higher standard and not acknowledging that her words could be perceived as hurtful is akin to ignoring the very human aspects of her character. it’s essential to recognize that she is capable of making mistakes or risk turning her into a perfect fandomised queen incapable of fault. her character's journey is not about being infallible, but about growth, self-reflection, and the courage to confront and overcome her fears. strong and resilient, yet also capable of causing harm, even unintentionally. 

there’s a phenomenon in fandom spaces but particularly the grishaverse where fans have an opinion of something and then deem everyone else’s as bad or wrong, going so far as to make posts calling out other people for having different analysis. literary discussions should encourage an environment where different interpretations are welcomed and discussed respectfully, not minimised and devalued for a more popular fandom take that’s often incorrect when compared with the text of the book anyway. it’s okay for inej to make mistakes and learn from them, just as it's okay for readers to have varied interpretations of their interactions.

[flawseer]

Mail Call #3

Answering comments from @void-the-bear @railway-lands @keabirb @ilikebookssomuch @chezgorman @cartoons-everywhere @dragonra305

Please don't hurt me. I have glasses.

Thank you, to all of you. It makes me genuinely happy to know that I'm able to put something into this world that other people can enjoy. I think this is a great setting that is fun to add to.

Doing a Wings of Fire-themed run of this Smaugust challenge has been very interesting and it's good that the result appears to be well-received. It's not always been easy, I'm actually getting quite exhausted having to post content on a strict schedule like this. But it is worth doing if it makes people happy.

Relating to my comment on this post. I probably will do it eventually, along with some other ideas I had that didn't fit in. But it won't happen while Smaugust is still going, as I am already skirting the limits of what I am physically capable of right now.

Ahh... hm... This is the question that has toppled mountains and started wars. You're going to get hit squads sent after me.

Well, there is the big one, of course. Qibli/Winter. They have such wonderful chemistry whenever they are in a scene together (with one pretty upsetting exception). And Qibli is always teasing him about being his destiny and the two of them getting married, so I think there is some attraction there.

Then uh... I used to feel completely ambivalent about this one, but Starflight/Fatespeaker has really grown on me over time. There's a lot of interesting potential there that doesn't really make it into the story. I need to make a long-winded post about Fatespeaker one day.

Blaze/Glacier is another one that could be cute. I think putting a repressed Icewing together with a highly eccentric and rambunctious Sandwing is going to be a winning combination most of the time. Or well, I guess I should say "could have been cute", since Glacier had to die for the plot, in a very wretched and infuriating way too.

There are a couple more that I think have their moments or could be interesting in one way or another. Some of them even contradicting or overlapping each other. Listing all of them would probably be a bit excessive.

Oh yeah, and I think Sunny is ace.

Ah, a question that'll make me put someone else's favorite character at the bottom of a preference list... After the shipping question I'm starting to fear for my life now.

Let me preface this by clarifying that I generally like all of the DoD. There are some characters in this setting that I loathe and wish they would exit the story, and the arc 1 protagonists are nowhere near that. So being ranked low here translates to me saying "Yeah, they're okay, room for improvement", not "wow, they're the WORST!"

Okay whatever, let's get down to it.

#1 - Sunny

That one's easy, I mean, just look at the pinned post on this blog.

Sunny is so wonderful and charming and perfect in every conceivable way, she is one of my six all-time favorite characters. She is the flower that blooms in the bitter desert. A lot of people may perceive her as this demure and innocent character who is always happy and friendly, and oblivious to the suffering around her. Nah, Sunny knows exactly what is going on. She is keenly aware of all the bloodshed, suffering, and toxicity that unfolds in the world around her. When she remains optimistic and forgiving in the face of darkness, that is not her being meek or passive, it's her steadfastly refusing to let that darkness into herself. She is actively embodying the change she wants to see in the world, even when it hurts her or gets her taken advantage of, because that is what she believes in and the future she will create.

That's pretty inspiring. I wish I had that kind of inner strength.

Also, she is not weak. While she's not a powerhouse scrapper like Tsunami or an invincible stack of bricks like Clay, Sunny strikes quickly and without hesitation when her friends are in danger, and can be deviously clever. This is often overlooked, but she is--to my knowledge--the only character to land an attack on Morrowseer that comes close to actually hurting him.

Well... you got me rambling about Sunny. Let's go through the others more briskly.

#2 - Starflight

I like Starflight a lot. Unfortunately the story really doesn't. He is like, the unluckiest character by far. I don't know what he did to deserve the never-ending cavalcade of misfortune that gets shoveled in his direction throughout all three arcs. Like, it never ends. A couple of friends and I came together and we jokingly called our group the "Starflight Protection Foundation", because someone needs to stage an intervention. Like, wrap him in a cozy sweater and buy him hot chocolate or something. Heaven help this poor man.

He's another one of my favorites.

#3 - Glory

Glory is really cool; I vibe with the "unchosen hero spurned by destiny" theme. She goes through her life and is constantly told "No, you don't have a special destiny. You're the fifth wheel. You are worthless and unimportant". Though she struggles with the constant abuse and devaluation, she eventually finds a way to turn it into strength and declare that the only value that matters is the one she gives to herself.

I really wish the story had NOT made her turn out to be a secret princess. "I was born without destiny, so I'm making my own" is a so much more satisfying character trajectory than "Oh, don't worry. You were born special after all, you just didn't know about it".

So yeah, I kind of tend to put that "secret princess" plot twist on the shelf when I think about Glory, and prefer to think that she managed to sway Grandeur with her skill and determination, rather than a random blood link.

#4 - Clay

Clay is very lovable. He is like the emotional bedrock of the group and acts as a stabilizing force that pairs well with all of the other arc 1 protagonists. He pretty much resolves all of his baggage in the first book and becomes content and steady. That is very good for him, but unfortunately this also kind of turns him into just some dude for the following four books.

Which is fine, it is good for the other characters to have someone behind them who loves them and helps them up when they stumble. It just makes it difficult for Clay to shine on his own.

#5 - Tsunami

Okay, so, Tsunami. I actually like her a lot in arc 1. She's bringing an interesting kind of energy to the group that is like, half-supportive and half-detrimental. Very chaotic. She also has to contend with some heavy stuff; everything to do with her father and the complications in her family life. It's very interesting. Lots of places to go with that.

Arc 2 Tsunami though, really grinds my gears. She regresses into this kind of juvenile, immature personality that is just pointlessly abrasive and confrontational. She acts really condescendingly towards Peril-- despite the latter having saved Clay's life AND it being really important to Clay that her staying at JMA works out well. Her borderline sabotaging this effort by making Peril feel unwelcome seems very dismissive towards Clay's feelings. It also doesn't help that she is the most outspoken about her loathing of Nightwing mindreading and prophecies, which drives Moonwatcher further into her emotional shell and makes things more complicated.

Okay, I have to reiterate: I don't dislike Tsunami. I just think her character arc is incomplete. It feels like she is stuck in arrested development while at JMA. She's mostly running around yelling at people, when she really should be thinking about what to do about Queen Coral, and how to get custody of her siblings. Her sister Anemone is carrying emotional scars from how the Queen has kept her leashed like a dog for her entire life, a process that is now happening to Auklet, even to this day. And then there's the 30 something children who have never known parental love for a day in their life and their mother can't remember the names of.

Someone's gotta step in and save these kids. Or like, at least start vaguely thinking about it.

Turtle???

Hmm....

...

Moose!

[mensahbots]

noma dumezweni (who plays mensah in the tv show) had an interview where she described her character in ways that helped me recontextualize mensah's actions in episode 3 a bit

[PreservationAux] come from a place that values emotional connection and humanity. We have chosen to be on this planet for research. She's holding the team together. She's very warm, she's very open. She listens to each individual as she's running the crew. But she's not supposed to be a fighter. She's not supposed to be in danger. Yet danger arrives. So she covers her panic attacks. She covers the stress. To be a leader, you don't put your fears onto the people that you're looking after. That's what I love about Dr. Ayda, and I loved playing her because she likes people. She likes to see the essence of the person she's talking to.

in particular, the bolded sentence, which i think a) is very mensah (and as different as book and tv mensah feel to me, i like the idea that her motivations and interiority could be very similar, particularly with respect to the character's integrity) and b) suggests mensah may have been speaking to murderbot as a perceived co-leader or equal/fellow on the team— that to her, it was someone she thought was appropriate to share those feelings with compared to characters like bharadwaj, gurathin, or pin-lee.

so maybe in mensah's mind, she isn't "looking after" secunit, it's ranked above and apart from the others. i like this angle because i think it implies mensah feels no sense of paternalism or superiority, and she also likely wasn't viewing murderbot as a mere thing to dump her feelings on either. not to mention, by episode 3, murderbot was the only person on the team who had witnessed her panicking in private. to her, the disclosures may have felt like an explanation more than putting her feelings onto it, especially after all that it had seen of her vulnerabilities already. yes i am coping, but is this not plausible?

also, in episode 4 when she's telling herself it's a machine while panicking, she might be thinking of its reaction to what she shared—that maybe her impulse to treat it as an equal and teammate was inappropriate—in her anxiety-fueled attempted justification not to help it. eg, "i don't need to save it, it's just a machine, i'm being foolish for thinking otherwise." pin-lee saying it wasn't on their team was what pushed mensah to respond and know without a doubt that she did need to help murderbot and that fear was trivial compared to the moral failure of not helping it. because i think to her, it's unquestionably a person, and she couldn't convince herself otherwise, nor could pin-lee. to mensah, it's her teammate.

the rest of the interview was also lovely. i loved hearing dumezweni reflect on her experiences on set and how positive a thing the show was for her. here are some more of her thoughts about the characters and story:

I do actually [see similarities between herself and the character]. I like people. I like saying hello. I like trying to figure out how people are feeling in a space. When I was younger, it was more about being a people pleaser. But that was a part of me, which I've now said “let's not do that.” But my curiosity about people is still there and I love that. In terms of Ayda, she has a strong sense of herself, but not of the world she's suddenly in. And that's what's so beautiful about the writing: these warm, emotionally connected people are suddenly confronted with real danger. And that’s where the tension happens. They need Murderbot, beautifully played by Alexander [Skarsgärd], to look after them. Murderbot comes into our lives and we are affected by it. And it is affected by us.

[graphite-grey]

Snailstep Clangen ref - 5 (final)

Bladeback and family

Bladeback - based on the Hunter (his name is Galloglas but it doesn't matter). Gruff and of few words, the Hunter is distrusting of others and generally approaches them with a pinch of bitterness. He's well aware of how unsavoury his kind is and knows that people will always try to get something for nothing. Is aware he's not the most dangerous thing out there, but suffers from arrogance and over confidence in his skill despite his age taking him beyond his prime. He's walked alone for so long that he's a little justified in having faith in his ability, but must learn to admit he's getting old. Not prone to talking much, his idea of socialising is just sitting in the same vicinity, and more often than not he'll seek out somewhere sheltered and quiet to just hunker. Doesn't like people who are too friendly or ask too many questions. His temper may sometimes flare when others do things he perceives as stupid or reckless, and he doesn't like it when others question his skill or imply he's incapable. Despite all this bristliness, he will defend those close to him with an insatiable ferocity if need be, and is tireless in the hunt, which is what he does best. Does also enjoy the occasional dirty joke or interesting story, just don't expect much response other than the odd grunt. Stubborn and tough like an old boot.

Leafbreeze - based on Orla the herbalist. Mischievous and strong willed she enjoys a good laugh and company, though does equally well on her own, busying herself. Rich in common sense and patience, she has a firm hand in dealing with obstinace or idiocy. Receptive to new things, and always ready to improve or learn, Orla finds relative success in anything she puts her hand to, but will also stick by her morals or options with respect without being swayed, if anyone doesn't like it then they can lump it. If she sets her mind to something then it's difficult to dissuade her. Is very loving but not in a cloying overly fussy way, she believes in making mistakes to learn, no matter how harsh. A terrible singer. Also very stubborn, so the standoffs between her and the Hunter can go on quite long - but she always wins.

Oakweb - based on Gilgallen. Bold but aware of his shortcomings, Gilgallen would fit the archetypal 'hero' type in a fable, out saving maidens with nothing but noble intent. He is a bit of a romantic, fond of such tales of valour and daring deed, and eager to help those in need. The 'good guy' with very few flaws except perhaps a refusal to see the naivety in such an optimistic and glorified outlook. He could never understand his father's bitterness and hostility toward people, finding instead, an upside to everything - within reason. Perhaps I’d call him an optimistic realist - sure bad things happen, but it’s how you handle them that counts. And Gilgallen always chose grace. Was killed in a hunt gone wrong. His death hit his father extremely hard - aging him greatly, both mentally and physically. Gil was considered a hunter with great potential, but even he made a a fatal mistake - making the Hunter question how well he’d prepared the others. Growing harsher on them all, and himself. Gil’s absence in death is perhaps an influence just as powerful as his presence was in life.

Quickrain - based on Bedwyr. Perhaps the most outgoing of the siblings, a bit of a troublemaker from the start, stirring up the other kids with pranks and amusing little songs (made up at the expense of someone else). There's many an unfortunate nickname started on the lips of Bedwyr and stuck for life to another. Despite this, he's apparently too likable to have been murdered or brutalised. Generally easy going, personable, and charming, Bedwyr is highly social and seems to be able to do anything he thinks to put his hand to (which is mostly playing a large collection of musical instruments he was somehow gifted by people he charmed). A bit flippant about romantic relationships, isn't ready to take anything too seriously. However he's very inventive and clever when it comes to solving problems, and is very family oriented. Despite not being there as much, he's always there for his younger siblings to encourage even if perhaps he might not be feeling up to it. Always optimistic with jokes and songs, making it difficult to tell when he's really feeling anything else. Also the most travelled and 'people wise', loving to frequent bars to gather tales - many of which he might have started, returning home to share the tales with the louts he calls siblings. Close to Gilgallen and took his death very hard. Bedwyr is know for being able to calm situations diplomatically, and the only son the Hunter will even concede to.

Poppyprickle - based on Branwen. Lovingly named 'the Dragon' by her siblings. Fiesty, and free with the 'smacks round the gob', Branwen can hold her own against her brothers and more! She takes no nonsense from anyone and knows what she wants when she wants it. Branwen is also a healer like her mother, but a lot more heavy handed, she sees no use in pussyfooting about things that'll hurt, it'll hurt either way - including the truth, which she's a great adherent of. Branwen will speak what's on her mind regardless of who is offended. She does however have a soft side, you just have to find it. Is a fan of floral scents and greatly proud of her luscious locks and fur, also likes patterns and lovely girly things, and she doesn't care who knows it. Grew closer to Bedwyr when Gil was killed, perhaps sensing his need for comfort, but their banter is often a swapping of light hearted insults, so she's not all brusque, but quite quick witted too to match him. Has a bunch of suitors from the other hunter clans vying for her hand, but for now is content to let them beat each other up over her. And they say romance is dead...

Pinestorm - based on Saxon. Reliable and solid, both in build and character, Saxon is a rock of sense. Protective of his younger siblings, but also respectful of the elders, he's the middle child who gives the parents no trouble at all. Mild mannered, but not as blinded by noble deed as Gilgallen, Saxon is the one to rely on to get things done or keep order amongst the rabble. Caring but also tough yet fair, Saxon's greatest challenge is Darragh, whom he of all the siblings is best at keeping in check. Though he will not admit it, he worries at the age of their father and how tired he sometimes looks, this gives Saxon anxiety though he'll hide it well. With Bedwyr not always around, Saxon is the head of the family should something happen to the Hunter, and that's a responsibility he questions his ability to handle well.

Strikewhistle - based on Darragh. The most troubling of the siblings, Darragh takes too much after his father when he was young, and that is what makes them butt heads too often. His recklessness has to be reined in more often than not or it'll lead to disaster. Often unthinking, Darragh is a creature of impulse and this can be dangerous. He's mischievous and still really a boy playing at being a man (or half beast), always up for proving himself or taking sport in dangerous or stupid things, often goaded by the others, he’ll do anything without much consideration toward the consequences. Lives in the moment. Not the brightest of tools in the shed he's always ready for some amusement, and has an inflated opinion about his prowess and physique. Despite all this he's still very much an uncertain child and will retreat into himself when something goes wrong because of him, moping for a long time and questioning why he just didn’t throw caution to the wind. Though he teases Carrigh, he loves his little brother a lot, and if Darragh is not poking him in sport, then his family know something is wrong. He does sometimes clash with Bedwyr, but Darragh is no match.

Tanglewasp - based on Carrigh, the Unlucky. Small and runty and often the butt of his siblings' jokes, Carrigh didn’t earn the title ‘the unlucky’ for nothing. If something is bound to go wrong, it will if Carrigh is involved. Despite this sour luck, Carrigh is resilient and often has grand plans of his own - if he can ever get over his moments of paralysing fear when faced with stressful situations. A little snappy and defensive, Carrigh often bickers and is contrary with his other siblings and is a prime target for Darragh, who takes great joy in teasing him for his unfortunate acne. It’s all in good spirits however, and Carrigh knows this, but he is still deeply insecure and needs a lot of encouragement - just don’t make it obvious or he’ll become insufferable with the attention. Worries a great deal over the safety of his siblings and this makes him challenge a lot of dangerous situations, being a little tattle-tale. The loss of Gil hit him hard though he also doesn’t show it, simply becoming more cautious and anxious. If the best of them can die then he’s terrified of losing the others. Destined, however, for a great fortune in fate at one point. Luck will love him later - if he ever knew this fact, he’d become extremely irritating and possibly never make it to find out without being smothered by someone first.

Nettlekit - based on Ceridwen. The youngest by many years, Ceridwen is her family’s darling - but none more so than her father - perhaps because, where he saw all the negatives of himself in Darragh, he sees all the childhood joy and innocence he once had, in his daughter. Boisterous and energetic, Ceridwen is a little naughty, but never in an obnoxious brat way - she softens the edge of annoyance by being charmingly funny. Ever curious, she likes nothing more than to be around others, but is also perfectly capable of amusing herself with no worries that she’ll come to any real harm. There is in her a responsible independence and even-temperament akin to Saxon - but with the brusqueness and fire of Branwen - combined with the amusing mischief of Bedwyr. She does sometimes lose her temper, but is quick to forgetting her anger. Is, like all children, highly curious and inventive, and eager to learn everything her elders are showing her - with a lot of questions and random theories. Is a bit of a tomboy, which is understandable considering her siblings. Is practicing her ‘intimidating stance’ with great seriousness, much to the entertainment of everyone else. (For @snailstep-and-her-clan, she’s very much like Fiadh/Willow, but a little bossier - so Willow will make the perfect mentor)

More

Part 1 - Ermineclaw and family

Part 2 - Cherrystar and family

Part 3 - Medicine cat and weirdos

Part 4 - Wolfstrike and family

Part 5 - you're here

*****

All cat designs were created by @snailstep-and-her-clan

[nobody-viii]

The Turks - Context Clues (The Kids Are Alright)

@accala posted an excellent inquisitive post about the Turks here and their motivations and to add some The Kids Are Alright: A Turks Side Story book context, imma leave this here. Couldn't find the quote I was looking for, but here's some things I found interesting. NOTE: I feel like Advent Children did the Turks a little dirty, but I really loved the banter as a kid. This book has some of the same campy shortcomings, but take it or leave it, here's what I found.

1.) The Healen Lodge from Advent Children was an R&R facility for Shinra, universally accepted as the worst one by employees. The Turks/Rufus chose it for its tactical advantages, but it also shows how far back on their heels they were. "The Shinra empire had ruled most of the world up until two short years ago, and it didn't sit right with Elena that the company president had to live in such a desolate place. Yes, medical treatment was available, security was way better away from the city, and the commute was only two hours by car; the staff could have had it much worse." - pg. 14

2.) The abandoned rec hall was being used by Shinra as a lab to convert SOLDIER stimulants into geostigma treatments. The project was Elena's idea, with the resulting medication being donated free of charge to city medical professionals and the WRO. (pp. 16-17)

3.) Reno & Rude were sent into the city to retrieve a stolen item from a teenager (read the book for details I'm too lazy to go into it), and when he started crying and shaking, Reno and Rude switched to a new script. "Aw, look. The kid's really scared." The redhead sounded sympathetic now. "That's what we came to do," the bald one pointed out. And: "Now, we put on our best tough-guys acts on the way over, so we can't just leave without roughing anyone up," said the redhead. "Our job is to teach a lesson to anyone who tries to mess with us." I was still scrambling for an explanation to give them. "Y-you mean, kill me?" was what came out instead. My voice even cracked for good measure. "That's one way to teach a lesson. But we're trying to strike a balance for Shinra, here. We want everyone to love us and maybe be a little bit scared. Killing you would have the opposite effect." (pg. 23) Reno opted to punch the kid in the face, then tell him to keep his chin up, so...balance? Sure. Shinra is, at this point, technically trying to figure out their PR while simultaneously leaning on old habits. Also, the kid calls Reno and Rude a knife and a fork and I thought that was funny.

4.) Reno is described as someone who looked like he 'turned delinquent as a teenager and never grew out of it, like those kids in the Sector Eight warehouses who I still hated and admired in equal measure.' (pg. 23)

5.) Elena roughs up one of the protagonists, but reins herself in when context is presented: She'd paid a visit intending to break Fabio's dominant arm, but when she saw him fight back to protect the child, she changed her plan. Her objective was to punish a thief, not deprive a child with geostigma of his only guardian. (pg. 47)

6.) Reno calls a doctor for the guy he roughed up. Kyrie nodded. "I figured, these guys must have phones, so I asked them to call Dr. Drake. 'Evan's in a bad way 'cause you guys beat him up,' I told them. And guess what? They said they don't know any Evan. So I lost it and said, 'Yeah, 'cause Evan's the one you whaled on when you mixed him up with Fabio. You owe him..... So then the redhead--his name's Reno--he called a doctor. Not Dr. Drake, he said, but a good one..." (pg. 55)

7.) Evan (the protagonist) is trying to work out who would be the easiest Turk to try to forge an alliance with and we get a glimpse of how the Turks are perceived by outsiders (Tseng is an unknown entity to Evan at this time): The most dangerous one was probably the lady Turk who went after Fabio. A close second would be the slab of muscle out there, Rude. Maybe the redhead Reno was more on our level. I thought back to my first impression of him--the grown-up teenage delinquent. Guys like that generally looked out for their own. A sense of solidarity. There had to be an angle I could work. (pg. 57)

8.) There's a whole scene where Evan and Kyrie try to ambush Rude. They choke him, break a chair over him, kick, scratch, the whole shebang and he just brushes himself off and manhandles them to a car (which made me laugh).

9.) Reno and Rude take the protagonists towards Healen in a truck and there's a few moments I found interesting. "So anyway..." Reno was looking at me in the rearview mirror. "Sorry about the shiner, dude. We totally did think you were Fabio. But y'know, I'm impressed you stayed mum and protected your buddy," Reno went on. "Even if you were about to piss your pants." (lol) Then, "Some of us have been slower to to adapt to the new way of doing things," Reno continued. "How many Turks are left?" asked Kyrie. "Can't tell you. That's Shinra's most closely guarded secret." "It's just you three, isn't it?" "Not telling." "But I'm right." "Yeah, you keep thinking that." (pg.63) Rude sleeps through the majority of the ride despite Reno trying to keep him awake. They talk quite a bit about Aerith, because Kyrie and Reno both knew her. Reno warns them not to get mixed up with Shinra's science department.

10.) Evan gets introduced to Rufus for the first time after believing the former president has been dead for two years and Tseng finally exists in this book for two seconds. "He's alive...?" Evan was still speaking to Reno. "I am. The decoy who took my place is not," Rufus replied. "You're a candidate for the position--and from what I can see, you'll do." Evan's jaw dropped, and he stared agape at Reno, then Rufus, then Tseng. Tseng looked down at the ground, trying to hide his laughter. Evan's description of Tseng: He looked like a Turk, too. The very definition of one, in fact. Reno and Rude both showed an awkward humanity--well, sporadically in the latter's case--but this guy was pure ice.

11.) An ill-conceived escape attempt by Evan and crew sees Rufus temporarily kidnapped, as Tseng and Elena are investigating an explosion. Reno and Rude try to stop it, but are ordered back. "Reno, stay back!" Reno obediently halted. I had expected to see fury in his eyes, but all I say was sorrow. Surprisingly, I felt a pang in my chest, too. But there was no other way. I pulled Kyrie's knife from my pocket and opened it--a sad, flimsy little blade, but it could still slice open a throat. "Hey, don't be stupid." I ignored Reno and held the knife to Rufus Shinra's neck. Then, "Reno, take Rude and check on the lab." Suddenly Rufus was giving orders. "Tell Tseng not to get involved here." "Wait, what? Boss, are you sure?!" "Don't worry. I'm as interested in staying alive as you are." Reno reluctantly descended the stairs, glancing over his shoulder almost every step. (pg. 77)

12.) Reno and Rude talk about family and have a lil tiff. "If I found out about a brother I'd never seen, I'd make way more of an effort than those two," Reno insisted. "That right?" Rude said. My colleagues are all I need. "You're not much into family, eh, Rude?" "I'm a Turk," Rude said flatly. "Coolheaded and cold-blooded." He turned and headed for the truck. "Hey, Rude. You pissed at me?" Reno called, an unabashed whine. "C'mon, man. You can't cold-zone me now. Tseng and Elena aren't answering my calls, and the boss just tells me to finish the monument. I know they're starting something awesome without us. We're outcasts! Me and you, you and me. If we don't stick together, then what?" Rude looked back. "Tseng isn't answering calls?" (pg. 94) Reno goes off several times throughout this book about how he'd act if he got the chance to meet family, which makes me wonder about him. "So how'd it feel, meeting your brother?" "I don't think it's sunk in yet." "Well, it's a process, I guess," said Reno. "But you gotta visit once in a while, you know? Then you'll get to figure each other out. Break the ice." (pg. 97)

13.) Reno and Rude are actually partially responsible for the monument in the city. This lil bit kinda gives weight to how long they've been in Shinra. Evan was one of those types who wasn't quite grounded in reality but was full of bravado. A show-off. A scared kid determined to buck people's expectations by pretending he had no fear. And if he kept it up, he was gonna do something stupid enough to get himself killed. Both Reno and Rude had known too many kids like that, from rookie Turks to infantrymen to SOLDIER operatives wet behind the ears from mako infusion tanks.

14.) Reno & Rude get amused by Kyrie treating them like they're not scary. The concern over redemption makes an appearance. "Now what?" Rude stepped closer from his vantage point. Apparently, he'd been watching the whole time. He was pretending he didn't care, but inwardly, Reno was convinced, Rude was intrigued by every act of the farce. Which only made the whole thing funnier. "She said she's hungry," said Reno. "So she's gonna grab something to eat." "It's like she's never heard of the Turks. It's almost refreshing," Rude remarked. So this is what happens when Shinra wins hearts and minds. Reno chuckled again but then remembered that the girl was still afraid of them. He'd seen the goosebumps on her arms. Her toothless threats were her way of gauging the danger he and Rude presented. Evan might trust them, but not Kyrie. Despite what Rude said, she knew what they were and what they were capable of. "You know," said Rude. "She reminds me of Aerith." "Yeah, I was thinkin' that too." Maybe helping them out will redeem us, at least a little bit, he thought. A guy can hope. (pg. 106)

15.) Shinra's resources are thin...and that chopper that ate it in AC was one of the last ones left (cue gross sobbing because in the words of a certain Puppy, Shinra makes good stuff). No one knew exactly how many helicopters the Shinra Company used to have. Within a half a year of Meteorfall, many of them had been looted. Accidents, mechanicals, and other circumstances had taken out others, and now Rufus Shinra and the Turks were left with only three. But even with so few, it was a constant battle to keep them in working order. Also, Rude has mechanical experience and is the one on repairs.

16.) A civilian points out the flaws in Reno's hopes for the future of the Turks. "Well, to be honest, maybe my opinion of you guys is changin'." Doyle looked at Reno again with a level stare. "You're up to better things." Reno couldn't help averting his eyes. Unless it came from a fellow Turk, approval tended to make him uncomfortable. "The monument and the medicine are only one step, you know. Just wait. It might take a while, but Shinra's gonna get off the ground again. Rise again, you hear?" That general idea had been floating around in his head for some time. This was the first time he'd said it aloud. "How?" Doyle scowled, his thick eyebrows lowering. Reno cursed himself for the thoughtless comment. "Can't tell you." "Yeah, I figured. But no one is going to let a violent regime lord it over them again. Not anymore. You tell your president that."

17.) Tseng and Elena bring up the notion of inviting old Turks back into the fold. "For any one person, finding it (Jenova's head) may well seem like a futile task. But there is still a nonzero chance. Either way, staying in contact with our agents and meeting regularly are essential to maintaining organizational cohesion." " But how many...?" Elena glanced around and spoke in a stage whisper. "How many former Turks can we expect to help us?" In his mind, Tseng saw the faces of the old Turks, his former subordinates. Of those, he had made contact with-- They get interrupted and Elena rushes off to investigate something. Tseng watched his operative go with a wry smile. Below the hem of her sundress, old scars marked her legs. Once you joined the Turks, you were in for life. Even those who tried to get out and build new lives could be summoned back with a single phone call. Maybe it was a cruel call to make, Tseng thought. and he sighed.

18.) Reno & Rude defy a direct order from Tseng. "Dumbass," Reno muttered. "What are you waiting for? Engage!" Tseng's command rang from the speakers. "Evan's down there," Rude answered in Reno's stead. "He's already done for," said Tseng. "Fire." "No can do," said Reno. "Reno." Tseng made his name a sharp rebuke. "He's our friend." "Fine. Let me briefly explain--" Tseng's voice abruptly cut out. "Radio trouble," Rude mumbled, his hand drifting away from the radio's master switch.

There are a lot of quirky, funny, violent, or neato moments I didn't list, so check out the book if you want more insight. Hope this gave you some headcanon fodder.

[celtigxr]

The Pink Dread (Master List) - - - - - ch. iv: unforgiven

Chapter Summary: The dinner with the reunited families goes about as well as everyone thought it would.

Word Count: 3703

Sneak Peak: “Oh, shit,” Aegon spoke into the rim of his cup, a wide grin upon his face.  Floris choked, forcing Clement to pat her on the back.  Shyla gasped, then promptly hid her mouth with her hands. “Valeana,” Arthor hissed at her, though it fell on deaf ears. 

Warnings: None, i think. Language, I suppose, lol.

T H E   R E D S

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Valeana never hated her step sister more than that very moment when they gathered around the table. Floris bumped into her shoulder to take her place at Clement’s right before Val could get there. By all rights, as Bartimos’ second child, she should have sat next to her brother, but Floris was always adamant that the order of things go by age, and that she was Bartimos’s eldest daughter, not Valeana. 

Floris has always been a shrew, but her attitude had soured with age. She had become more entitled and frequently bullied her sisters to do what she wanted them to do. Shyla was far too fragile to disobey, and Val picked her battles. Sometimes the headache wasn’t worth the effort. 

Valeana bit her tongue as she descended into her chair, forcing herself to keep her head down, gaze away from the man across from her. Which was difficult. All her effort was put into the muscles of her neck and face, willing herself to be as close to a statue as humanly possible. Her cheek faced Aemond while she pretended to listen to the King’s toasts. From the corner of her eye, she could see him openly staring, only breaking when his father stood up to toast to forgiveness.

That was when Valeana looked at Aemond without fear of eye contact. How could he, when she now faced the side of his face that was marred and sightless. A pity, a small voice said in the back of her mind. He had such pretty lilac eyes. He still had that regal profile, though, with that strong jawline and aquiline nose. He still had those sharp bow-shaped lips. The softness of his boyishness long gone, replaced by chiseled cheekbones and sharp edges. He reminded Valeana of the tip of a sword. Proud, regal, dangerous, lethal. Unlike a sword, Val had the intrusive desire to run her tongue down the slope of his jawline.

Cursing herself, she tore her eyes away.

As more food was placed upon the table, conversations took place. The adults conversed in pleasantries filled with nostalgia, and the youth exchanged awkward glances, pretending to pay attention to what they were talking about.

Until the silence was finally broken. 

“Sunfyre must be very big now, Prince Aegon,” Shyla craned her neck to find the prince in question. “I remember when he was the size of a horse.” 

Aegon’s ears perked up at the mention of his dragon; it was clear that the beast was his greatest pride. 

Still chewing on a roll, Aegon replied, “Oh yeth,” he took a cup of wine and drank down his morsel. “He’s gotten quite large. Big enough to fly two in his saddle.” 

Shyla’s face lit up like the Grand Sept on Maiden’s Day, though Valeana was the only one who really caught it. She knew exactly how her sister perceived his words: she believed that Aegon was offering her a ride on Sunfyre. 

Valeana remembers Aegon threatening to set her on fire once, because she wouldn’t stop asking to come to the Dragon Pit. They were never allowed, not even with Helaena, who’s dragon, Dreamfyre, was already domesticated and well trained. The Dragonkeepers wouldn’t allow it, and neither did their father. 

“If that were true, then I’d imagine Vhagar could seat double,” Surprisingly, it was Arthor who spoke. Val wasn’t used to her youngest sibling speaking when the crowd was more than three. However, he had always been fascinated by dragons, ever since he saw the Cannibal flying around Crackclaw point. 

The black wild dragon was an island regular, being so close to Dragonstone where his cave was located. When Valeana sequestered herself in her room, she would spend hours on her balcony, watching him, imagining herself being the only person alive that could claim him. The Cannibal, the wildest, largest, and dangerous of dragons alive. No one even knew how old he was, or where he came from, or how he ended up feasting on his own kind, and that made the creature all the more interesting to her. 

Though she did not have the blood of the dragon, and so she kept her fascinations to herself. 

Aemond turned to the young Celtigar, his smirk like coiling ribbon, “Vhagar is as mighty as her size, but I would not say she could seat four and still fly unimpeded. Three at most, I would say.” 

For the first time since they arrived, Arthor smiled, “That is still impressive. I should like to see her, if it is not too much trouble.” 

“I would not get your hopes up, brother,” Valeana found herself talking despite her unofficial vow of silence. Her eyes never left her plate as she cut her venison in bite size pieces, “The Dragonpit is reserved for dragonriders and their keepers.”

There was a moment of surprised silence before Aemond spoke, “Vhagar is far too big for the Dragonpit. So, to answer your question, Arthor, it would not be too much trouble, if we find the time.”

Valeana still hadn’t looked up from her food. 

“Would you care to join us, Valeana?” 

She froze, fork hovering over her plate, halfway to her lips. This was the first time he had said her name in ten years, at least in her presence. The first time he directly acknowledged her. There was a strained aura at their end of the table, one that the adults weren’t paying attention to. 

“It can be quite daunting to be in the shadow of a beast of Conquest, but Vhagar is quite loyal to me. You will be safe under my supervision,” He continued when his question went unanswered. 

Val hummed, and her body unfroze like a ship at full canvas when the rush of wind from an upcoming storm pushed it into life. No, she couldn’t help herself… Her mouth was already open, tongue sharp like an arrowhead. 

“Am I? Forgive me my skepticism, Prince Aemond, but the last time I stood near you, I nearly lost my life. I do not trust you near a flight of stairs, let alone a dragon,” this time she looked directly at him, her sentence punctuated by how she put the food in her mouth. Her teeth sliding against the metal utensil as she pulled the morsel free. 

“Oh, shit,” Aegon spoke into the rim of his cup, a wide grin upon his face. 

Floris choked, forcing Clement to pat her on the back. 

Shyla gasped, then promptly hid her mouth with her hands.

“Valeana,” Arthor hissed at her, though it fell on deaf ears. 

Aemond’s jaw tightened as he tried to hold her venomous gaze, but ultimately failed. He turned his cheek to her, directing his attention to his cup instead. 

“You do not need to make this more difficult than it needs to be,” His voice seemed softer, as if defeated or tired. “This is the season of peacemaking, is it not?”

Valeana couldn’t stop her eye roll, and when she did, she spotted the heated glare Floris was giving her. 

Be. Nice. She mouthed. 

No. Val mouthed back. 

Floris cleared her throat, “Right you are, Prince Aemond. I have many fond memories of our shared youth.”

“Mhm,” Valeana nodded sarcastically as she viciously cut a carrot in half, “Like that one day when Aegon told you he had a present waiting for you in a room, and you foolishly opened a water closet while Septa Jeyne was–”

“-- I remember no such thing,” Floris was quick to shake her head, her hands making quick work of the meat on her plate. 

"I do!" Aegon giggled into his cup. "I'll never forget Septa Jeyne's face," Aegon mimicked the old woman's look of shock, a silent scream on his tongue. 

Floris' face was as red as the wine in her goblet that she tried to hide in. 

Aegon continued, pointing at Valeana, "Do you remember when I stole one of Helaena's bugs and put it down the back of your gown?"

"Vividly," Val's tone dripped with cynicism as she side-eyed her sister, "Such fond, fond memories." 

Helaena had a pained expression on her face as she turned to her brother, "The one with the many legs? I was looking for that bug for days. I cried, Aegon, remember?"

Her brother's face dropped, and something akin to shame replaced the mischievous expression, "I-- Helaena... You had so many-- It was only a bug--"

"Do you still collect insects, Princess?" Valeana decided to alter the direction of the conversation, saving Aegon from an awkward non-apology, and from Helaena having to endure it. 

The Princess turned away from her brother, her features changing to something less pained, and more content. Val had clear memories of the princess being so far removed from her brothers, it was difficult to see how they were related if she did not consider her features. Though their shared memories together were limited to embroidery, since Helaena seldom left her areas of comfort, and the Celtigar girls had no taste for remaining in the same rooms from dusk to dawn. Shyla and Floris in particular couldn't stand being around the many-legged creatures that Helaena loved so dearly. Valeana had no opinion of it; she knew she didn't care for insects enough to handle them with her own hands, but she had always watched the princess from a careful distance with Queen Alicent.

She nodded, a smile showing her pride on it, "I do. One of my spiders had recently mated and made an egg sack."

Shyla made a horrified face. 

"Y'know, Clement sails quite frequently to Pentos. He has seen quite exotic ones you may be interested in."

That got Helaena's attention, based on how her spine straightened and her knife and fork were forgotten, "Oh?"

Clement looked up at her, and offered her the small smile, "Uh, yes, Princess. Though, I did not know you were fond of such creatures, otherwise I would have brought one with me." 

Helaena asked what was the most interesting ones he had found, and the conversation went on like that between the two. With the attention moved off of her, Valeana turned back to her food and ate silently. The minutes went by with nothing of interest being said; Aemond talked more than Valeana, though only to answer questions by the others (sans Clement) and Val was resolute in not looking at him when he talked. It wasn't until the King's voice reached their end of the table that she looked up from her emptying plate. 

"Tell me, ladies, do you still sing? This old Keep was desperately missing the beautiful voices of the Celtigar girls."

Bartimos chuckled into the handkerchief as he wiped his mouth, "Oh yes, there is nothing like the song of the Sirens of Claw Isle. Girls, why don't you give us one or two?"

"Of course, papa!" Shyla stood up immediately, grin broad and eager.

“It would be an honour to perform for His Grace, and his family,” Floris replied demurely. 

Valeana straightened in her seat, and her mouth went dry when she turned to her father, a slight panic in her words as she spoke. 

“My lute is still packed with my belongings.”

Bartimos opened his mouth, but Viserys spoke before he could, “That’s quite alright, my dear. Your voice is instrument enough.” 

Sensing his daughter’s unease, Barty adjusted himself in the chair to look at the king, “Apologies, your Grace. Valeana— She no longer performs with her voice, you see. She has turned to the strings for her music.”

“No?” It was the Queen who spoke, delicate brow furrowing as she looked over at the girl in question, “Why is that, my dear? I remember you had quite a strong voice for a girl so small.” 

Valeana caught the smirk twitching at the end of Aegon’s lip from the word ‘small’, and the two caught each other’s eye. He was lucky he was so far away from her, because she had no qualms making sure he would not be able to sire heirs with a swift kick with the point of her shoe. 

“Womanhood had robbed me of the skill, your Grace,” Valeana replied, then cleared her throat, still feeling it dry. Her voice failed her in talking as well, it seemed. “My voice lowered, and I could no longer hold the same notes as my sisters.”

It was a partial lie; the truth of the matter was that she lost her confidence. After the years she spent isolated, she seldom talked, and singing felt like a language she no longer understood. She only ever hummed and sang lowly and idly by herself in the privacy of her bedchambers, and even then she would cringe at the way her voice would crack when she attempted high notes that she once was able to do. 

“My sisters are still lovely as always, your Grace.”

“Well, I shall like to hear you play the lute on another date then, my dear,” The King smiled kindly. 

“She’s quite good!” Ursula boasted, “I personally love when she plays the lyre – puts me right to sleep!”

“Ahem,” Floris cleared her throat. She's on her feet, Shyla already on her heels, “May we begin?”

“Oh, of course, dear,” Ursula turned around in her seat to watch her daughters. “Please.” 

T H E  G R E E N S 

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The dinner with the Celtigars was as painful as Aemond suspected. For once, he allowed his pride to step aside and try to make amends with Valeana, as a favour for his father. He had expected more indifference, or meek politeness. He did not, however, expect confrontation coming from little Valeana. That was a new development. The Valeana he remembered was polite, kind, and while she had a quick tongue to retort, it was usually to be playful or humourous. Before the incident, she often forgave Aemond for his tardiness, or when he ignored her while he was around his brother and nephews. She didn’t even put up a fight when she was the butt-end of Aegon’s jests and pranks. 

“I do not trust you near a flight of stairs, let alone a dragon.”

Aemond wasn’t sure why, but that sentence felt like a gauntlet punch to his gut. Had anyone else said it, he would silently agree to it, because he wanted people to fear him. One could never trust Aemond next to Vhagar – one could not fully trust Vhagar, truly. His promise to Arthor was empty; he had no intention of letting the boy within a tourney’s field distance to the near two century old she-dragon. However, had Valeana agreed, he might have made an exception, because what greater way for him to make amends than to allow her to touch the largest dragon in the world? His dragon. 

He remembered how much she longed to touch one, almost as much as he did, but was denied even to be an audience member to dragon training in the pit.

The rejection was one thing, but if Aemond was honest with himself, it was the realization of the consequences of his crime that bothered him so. As a child, he selfishly justified his actions, in all things, not just with Valeana. He justified him claiming Vhagar, he justified him calling his nephews bastards, and he justified pushing Val away from him that day. It was all self-preservation, and at the time it benefited him. He got Vhagar, he got respect, he got fear, and he got away from the overbearing friendship of Valeana Celtigar. It burdened him, and held him back. When Bartimos left King’s Landing, Aemond’s life had changed for the better. He might’ve lost an eye, and he might’ve lost a friendship, but he gained so much more. 

Except… he lost a friendship. It did not occur to him how important that was until he realized it was truly gone for good. 

Because she could no longer trust him. And the confirmation from her own mouth felt like he was finally facing the corpse of someone he didn’t realize was dead. 

The rest of dinner went on in monotonous torture. Floris, Shyla, and Arthor respectfully tried to carry small talk with him, Helaena and Aegon as if nothing happened. Valeana remained quiet through it all, her eyes moving around him as if he was simply not there. It infuriated him. Aemond found himself staring at the crest of her head or her turned cheek, mentally chanting: look at me, look at me, look at me. 

He was dead to her. A ghost she could no longer feel or see. It was a worse feeling than being disemboweled by her resentful sharp tongue and teeth. And Aemond absolutely hated her for it. 

"Tell me, ladies, do you still sing? This old Keep was desperately missing the beautiful voices of the Celtigar girls,” His father asked, and Aemond and Aegon shared a look that communicated the same thing. 

Seven Hells, no this shit again.

The Sirens of Claw Isle as they were known to be called, became somewhat of an annoyance for the boys growing up. There wasn’t a feast where they weren’t encouraged to sing bard songs until all departed for the night. They had lovely voices, but to Aegon, Aemond, and even Jace and Luke, it was like listening to the excessive chirping of birds at the crack of dawn. Granted, at the time, Aemond only ever soldiered through it just to hear Valeana sing. Her voice had a way of echoing through the tall ceilings and down corridors, holding onto notes longer than her sisters. It was almost haunting.

“...She no longer performs with her voice, you see. She has turned to the strings for her music.”

At this, Aemond tilted his head and examined Valeana as she explained herself. Her neck, cheeks, and tip of her ears got a tinge of pink. She was embarrassed…or ashamed?

Curious…

Perhaps there was a gap in her armour after all.

A part of him was slightly disappointed.

After a rather ear-bleeding rendition of “The Maids that Bloom in Spring”, supper finally ended. When his father stood, so did everyone else. The King bid a good night, not without giving Bartimos a hug, a handshake to the Celtigar sons, and kisses on the cheeks of the girls. His mother did the same, leaving when the King made his exit. Soon Otto, Bartimos, and Ursula followed suit. 

As the group filtered out of the Small Hall, making their way back to the Holdfast, Aemond lingered at the tail. Clement was still conversing with Helaena about Pentos, which reminded him of how his grandsire suggested that the King may match the two. Seeing how the two easily conversed, the possibility seemed far more plausible than her thought. 

Valeana was a step behind them, walking alongside Arthor who examined the statues and tapestries they passed by. Floris had Shyla’s arm clutched in hers, and it was painfully evident that the younger girl was trying to free herself so she may crowd around Aegon.

Aegon, who was also trying to put distance between him and the eager girl, fell into step next to his brother. 

“Well, that went splendidly,” Aegon said once there is enough distance between them and the others ahead. “I half expected her to take out your other eye.”

Aemond sighed heavily through his nose, attention set straight ahead of him, “I am sure she thought of it. She loathes me.” 

“Can you blame her,” Aegon’s attention was on Shyla, who was craning her neck over her shoulder to catch a glimpse at him. Aegon wiggled his fingers at her, granting him a large, gummy grin.

“Father wishes me to reconcile,” Aemond ignores Shyla and instead watches the back of Val’s head. “But he asks for the impossible. She barely looks at me, and when she does…”

“Oh, I am aware, dear brother, it has become the source of my entertainment this evening.” 

“I am glad my misery has been that for you, brother.” 

Aegon turned to him, his eyebrow raised curiously, the corner of his lips upturned, “Does it cause you misery, Aemond? That she despises you?”

Aemond stopped walking to glare at him, his hands like stiff tree trunks at his sides. Aegon slowed to a stop in front of him, tilting his head, waiting for an answer. 

“That farce of a supper was miserable. Why would she cause me any other emotion other than apathy? She is a stranger to me.”

“She was your friend once, if I recall,” Aegon folded his arms over his chest, and relaxed his leg to stand casually. “And your betrothed.”

“It was not a friendship,” Aemond lied through his teeth, “None of us were friends with the sisters. We hated them, do you recall?”

“Oh, I recall Luke, Jace, and I hating them quite a bit. But I also remember you and Val exchanging love notes.”

“They were not–” Aemond stopped himself, moving a hand over his face and sighing through his nose again. “She clung to me like pollen to a bee. It was annoying, it was overbearing, it was too much.” 

Aegon narrowed his eyes at his brother skeptically, but he then quickly shrugged, accepting his words. “Fine, she fancied you a bit too much. Does it bother you that she doesn’t anymore? I bet it bruises your ego… Maybe it’s,” he waved a hand around his eyepatch, “Maybe it’s the eye. You’re half as handsome now–Ouf.”

With a rough slam with his shoulder, Aemond pushed through Aegon with the force of his step. As his back faced his brother, Aegon started to giggle madly behind him. 

Echoes of oinks and kissy noises reverberated in Aemond’s memory. 

“Well, if you feel nothing but apathy towards her, then mayhaps I should try courting her?” Aegon started to stride towards him, keeping up with his pace. “It would make father happy, uniting the Valyrian houses and all that noise.”

“You’re free to try, brother,” Aemond replied, voice clipped and dismissive. Valeana would never consider Aegon. She would never entertain the idea. It was absolutely ludicrous. 

Wasn’t it?

Tag: @queen-of-elves, @keylin1730, @anakilusmos

(if you wish to be tagged for updates, please reply and ask!)

Please do not re post, redistribute or plagiarize my work. The only other place this story is posted on is ao3 under the same username.

[guacemolyarts]

please please tell me how u perceive ellabs 😭😭😭 from a shipping standpoint😭😭 also i love ur art so much

Abby has always been number one. From being Jerrys daughter, to becoming the WLFs top Scar killer, to leading her entire friend group into a murder plot with her, etc. Abby has always been the one to take the lead and do whatever she wants by her own command because she has never not gotten what she’s wanted. When that attitude got the best of her in the end (her friends turning on her, realizing what they had participated in was fucked up, etc.) she became prideful and cowardly. Lev was able to reinvent that attitude with her by giving her a purpose to protect and love someone more than herself. Lev let her have a break for once, gave her a chance to have her guard down, and not always have to feel stoic. She stood up to the only person who could crumble her *just* a bit (Isaac) and Ellie, who unknowingly had been leading her down a death trap. Even when figuring that out, Abby never backed down, Abby still got the upper hand, Abby still had what Ellie wanted- someone to care about her and her life.

Now Ellie on the other hand? Ellie has NEVER had it easy. Grew up an orphan, was a bit of a loner without Riley, was regarded as a “sad kid” by Winston, the only adult who ever really gave her the time of day. This girl has been searching for love and support her entire life. Despite her bratty attitude and hotheaded tendencies, no matter what, shes always a softie. And when she gets fixated on anything, it becomes her purpose and the force that pushes through whatever situation shes in- on a lighter note, Savage Starlight quotes, on a darker note, Abby. Ellie finds strength in just *doing*. She doesn’t need to force anyone to abide by her order (unless you wanna argue Nora, but even then, what a sloppy attempt at getting her way). She steam rolls any situation she thinks is gonna get her to her goal (jumping off the bridge into the water with Joel, the entirety of Seattle Day 2 and 3, becoming a deadbeat).

And together? You get two women who come from remarkably different upbringing’s and backgrounds, who in the end, crave to care for and to be cared about. Abby who has the explicit need to put herself in any dangerous position, knowing she can get out of it unscathed, with the entire goal of making sure what she cares about makes it through safely. Ellie, who has only ever fought through survival, to not have to do it anymore. Who can just feel protected and at peace. Abby, who is meticulous in her planning and execution, Ellie, rough around the edges and will figure it out when she gets there.

Despite how opposite they are in those regards, they are similar in their unifying need to find inner peace and strive to do their best. Both of them are incredibly strong people- and together, in any dynamic and in any situation they must get through together, I perceive Abby to be the one who is more level-headed, less inclined to blindly walk into Ellies fire, and to take the reigns in any struggle they get themselves in. To guide Ellie down the smarter, albeit longer path, and for Ellie to complain and annoy her to every end because she thinks being safer is worse than being in a rush. Ellie, the tough, agile little moth who learned everything on her own and by Joels hand, who can cut through 7 men at a time and is quick on her fight or flight. Abby, the trained in combat ex-soldier who can wipe out any path she needs to get through just by one intimidating scowl.

This is an interpretation based on canon, i could talk in circled about them for hours. So heres a little tidbit of what i perceive them as as individuals but how those traits work together.

[purpledemonlilyposting]

Lily is making throwaways to talk to herself now cause she's too afraid to turn anons back on.

[Lily's post]

There are so many golden nuggets in here. Since these are both most likely Lily lets look at a few!

Lily's media takes are beyond just bad, she asserts that the creators of children's cartoons are dangerous extremists for perceived bad messaging in their works that Lily just makes up.

Even without that Lily's takes on symbolism, metaphor, and just basic narrative structure are worth examining because they are some of the most bizarre and ignorant many of us have ever encountered.

But no one "orients their life around you", Lily. It just feels that way because you sit in your subsidized apartment on the internet all day ordering Door Dash from a Subway you could easily walk to. I'd say get some sun but you'd probably turn to ash like a vampire.

As for me? I do something you're incapable of: putting on a show.

No one cares you're trans, Lily. Get over it. Plenty of trans people exist in online nerd culture. You can't hide from the consequences of your own words and actions by using your demographic as shield.

Pfft. They could try. Go ahead. Make videos about me. Hell, Lily, unlike you I don't even hold or delete comments. The little anklebiters who like to lecture me in my comment section don't seem to realize I'm the one allowing them to be there expressing their stupid ignorant opinions because that aligns with my principles.

Lily doesn't make a video about me because she knows I'd just react to and laugh at it. And with any luck YouTube has taken her ability to copyright strike away because she's used it maliciously 9 times.

Also retard. Just say retard, Lily. Not "tradigrade" not "child left behind" not "fetal alcohol syndrome". Just say retard.

You clearly want to. And are bitter you can't because of the insular audience you've cultivated.

This is how I know it's you because only Lily Orchard could be upset I criticized the bland Antarctica anime for being a bland Antarctica anime the sole focus of which is to get 4 teenage moeblobs on a big technical ship. Which is written by a middle aged man who does nothing but moeblob shows and directed by a woman who does nothing but moeblob shows. They both worked on No Game No Life, Lily. You know. This:

The one with the 11 year old loli in love with her step brother. Actually Lily it sounds right up your alley. You should watch it next.

Antarctica show is so full of so many plot contrivances. Why does Shirase just carry her wad of Antarctica cash everywhere and dropped it so carelessly? It's sure convenient that her and Kimari just happen to go to the same school and Kimari happens to hear her loudly wailing about the money in the bathroom. How does Hinata, a 16 year old high school drop out who works in a convenience store think she can even hope to afford this trip? Where are her parents in this anyway? We never see them.

The girls only get on the trip in the first place because another girl who is a child star vlogger just happens to be also going and just happens to contact them wanting them to go in her stead. And after making friends with them she tells her mother that she won't go without the other 3 girls but... the rest of the expedition that adamantly refused to let them on before just suddenly agrees to take them? Because this one minor celebrity and her manager mom who isn't even going said so? Takako only wanted to go to Antarctica because it just sounded neat, she's not an artic researcher, or engineer, or anything that would justify her being out there (a woman in STEM? Perish the thought says 50 year old Jukki Hanada I guess) and she died out in a blizzard trying to get a laptop to email her daughter who she has now left motherless for no good reason. And this is only ever treated as heartwarming and not idiotic.

Face it Lily. The entire show exists just to get 4 teenage girls on a big ship so otaku men can enjoy both brainless moeblobs and technical ship porn. The show sure likes to emphasize over and over how the girls are joshi kosei too. Why couldn't the show have been about the trip of the adult women (who incidentally also act like brainless teenage girls in the show)?

Yeah you guys aren't winning against me on Utena lol. Here, have my post where I have the video walking people through the episode itself. If you want to ignore the actual text of the series in order to appear morally forthright that's your own problem:

And everyone on the bus clapped, and that Asian woman's name? Albert Einstein. What does this have to do with anything except poisoning the well by linking this unsourced incident in peoples' minds to Ant and I?

Also it's Twitter. So Twitter is bad and unreasonable here, but they're not bad and unreasonable when they're squawking at me over a classic anime they've never even watched. Or squawking at Ant cause "L-L-Lily is totes a Native trans woman?? So you can't criticize any of the batshittery that spews constantly from her face hole??"

Ah now we're on to Lily's response to herself.

Oh look out Ant, Lily's got damning screenshots she just can't show anybody right now.

Probably similar to when she happily accepted a screenshot from Poppy of Poppy being creepy to Courtney and tried to blame Courtney for it.

Lily you attract attention when people talk about you because the wider nerdy internet knows your takes are insanely bad. And they know your takes are all tangled up in your personal dramas and heinous actions. They can tell. You're not as subtle as you think you are.

I cut together my response to your bad Utena takes in your 2023 Steven Universe video on a whim and slapped it on my completely unestablished personal YouTube account. It got 5k views in a few days. That's how disliked you are.

Nobody knows who I am but you sure copyright struck 4 of my livestream VODs trying to take my channel down. The 4 VODs where I most talk about your blatantly obvious incest fetish at that. Nobody knows who I am but I've gained 10k subs in 6 months primarily from dunking on you. Because I'm better at YouTube than you are.

And people do bitch at me for saying retard constantly. And you know why I keep doing it? Because the ones who most often tell me not to are some of the most annoying, entitled, self-righteous, puritanical control freaks and it's an easy way to weed them out.

By the way have fun trying to find a lawyer within 10 days who will tell you "Why yes, Lily, you can absolutely copyright these videos of yours full of footage that belong to Viacom, Netflix, Amazon, Toei Animation, Dreamworks, Activision-Blizzard, and many more!"

[floef-likes-minecraft]

Enamoured

Wordcount: 927 Summary: Pearl finds Joel at his base, looking at a somewhat familiar sight.

Pearl had come to Joels base to return the purpur, of course. Well, she wouldn’t just yet because she had to think of a clever way to present it to him first. She had toyed with the idea of building one of his famous skyscrapers out of it, but that would take her days. While she loved that idea, she didn’t think she could finish it before Joel would discover it. She could just cover one of his buildings in it, but that seemed unoriginal as she had already done so with Etho’s unfinished roof.

As she wandered through the base, she found herself drawn to a street with strange lighting. Given how hidden away it was, it should be nearly pitch black here but from the back a bright light flooded in. It was slightly pinkish and blue and almost seemed to move. Pearl stopped for a moment, wondered if it was safe for her to continue and then decided that she was willing to take the risk.

Pearl didn’t find anything dangerous. She didn’t find anything that wanted or could kill her. Instead, she found one of the most beautiful things she had ever seen. The street turned and leaded onto a bridge suspended high above the city, between two tall buildings. The bright lights came from the biggest billboard known to man, casting light and shadow over the colorful buildings. Because she was standing so close it took her a moment to fully see the moving hologram of a beautiful woman in deep blues and pinks and she looked vaguely familiar. Before Pearl could put her finger on who she was, she noticed Joel, who was standing in the dead center of the bridge, looking up to the billboard much like she was. He looked just as enamored as herself.

Instantly, Pearl had forgotten what she had come here to do. Joel seemed almost sad looking up at the light, high mouth slightly opened and barely blinking. It was as if he’d seen it for the first time, just like Pearl, despite this being his base. Pearl set her feet in motion, walking up to Joel silently.

“Who is she?” she asked in a whisper. Joel flinched and looked to his side. He blinked hard and swallowed before he answered. Pearl swore she noticed a tear in his eye, but she was smart enough not to mention it.

“I – I have no idea,” he said eventually. “I designed this billboard in a bit of a trance, I needed something to go up here. Then… I just created this.”

He gestured at the billboard vaguely and the lights almost seemed to reach out for his hand.

“She’s beautiful,” Pearl said.

“She is,” Joel confirmed and they stood in silence for a couple of moments, just enjoying the lights in front of them. Pearl had known Joel from before he joined this Server, they had been on some more Servers before and they had a lot of mutual friends. Joel was always the abrasive one, the loudest in the group and he didn’t shy away from a prank or comment that went over the line. But Pearl was observant and had always noticed the few dips in that energetic façade. He cared deeply for his friends and creations and there had always been moments where he had struggled with is memory. He played all of that off, however, just to not be perceived as weak or lesser than anybody else. Pearl didn’t know what background Joel came from, but there was no need for him to feel that way.

“Eh, what was it you came for?” Joel eventually asked, tearing his eyes away from the billboard.

“I… I forgot,” Pearl lied. Joel didn’t need to know about her purpur ploy. Not yet, at least. Joel snickered, the confidence that Pearl was used from him flowing back.

“Well, do I know that feeling Pearl,” he joked. “But you can just confess if you’ve gone on to long without seeing my beautiful face.”

“Oh, you wish,” Pearl said and she rolled her eyes. “I would’ve just gone to Bdubs’ and looked at that horrifying sign you made there.”

“It’s an expression of my emotions, thank you very much,” Joel defended himself. Pearl didn’t know what Joel had against horses, but he took every opportunity he could to rub in it Bdubs’ face, who loved the animals. Wars had started over less on this Server, Pearl knew, so she was curious where this would end.

If they even could, because rumors of another, actual war brewing outside this Server had started spreading.

“But, once you’re already here, can I ask you for some advice?” Joel started to walk along the bridge, away from the billboard Pearl didn’t really want to leave behind. “I have a couple of color palette’s I need help with, they just aren’t doing it for me.”

“Sure, I’ll take a look,” Pearl followed Joel, happy to help. Before she turned to corner she looked at the billboard once more. Now she saw the glittering background, which didn’t pop as bright as the hologram of the giant woman herself. It rolled over the screen, depicting a large white tower with a pink roof and several purple and green hot air balloons. It was to specific of a background to just be random. There must be some purpose to it and Pearl felt like she knew what it was. It was on the edge of her mind, but she just couldn’t touch it.

It probably wasn’t important.

Thanks for reading! This is a part of a fic/AU I'm writing which is very much not as peaceful as this. But I know myself by now and I might never actually finish a full story lmao. So, have this, as I'm pretty happy with this.

[sleeplesssmol]

Hot Take/Analysis: Sonetto went from the Foundation's cage to Vertin's leash.

Sonetto has more freedom in a physical sense. She can explore the world, experience new things, all that good stuff.

But mentally, she's still trapped.

Sonetto believes she's merely a supporting character in Vertin's story, almost admitting this to Sophia in the most recent chapter. She perceives her role as clearing the path for more significant figures capable of making an impact.

This echoes her mindset from her time with the Foundation.

Despite her undeniable prowess, Sonetto humbly sees herself as a tool for advancing supposedly "more important" causes, thus undervaluing her own worth.

When Sonetto and Vertin save Regulus and the Investigators from Manus, Sonetto's teammates express relief upon seeing her, trusting in their captain to save the day. Though Vertin initiates the action by reacting to the threat faster (her perception and ability to sense arcanum is beyond many other arcanists), Sonetto's swift response and strength play a crucial role. Despite their collaborative effort, she credits Vertin disproportionately, attributing their success mostly to Vertin's guidance and perception. It's a reocurring pattern for Sonetto to downplay her own brilliance. This leads into my next point.

LOOK AT VERTIN'S FACE WHEN SONETTO IS IN DANGER. Sonetto is so quick to defend Vertin, she ends up stressing the Timekeeper out. She was ready to die a martyr, now she's ready-- too ready to die for Vertin.

While we know Vertin has expressions, their usually subdued because she's "stoic". For her to spring up out her chair like that and show real panic is something we haven't seen from her thus far. For example, we know she gets furious with Arcana because her bangle starts searing into her skin, but her expression just looks a little mad without displaying the full extent of her fury. Btw I go more in depth Sonetto's effect on Vertin in this post and this one I made later if you're interested.

Sonetto is highly competent, but completely dependent on others in the fact that her "purpose", her "value", is assigned to her by others.

Sonetto doesn't need Vertin to shine, but only Vertin seems to get that out of the two of them. At least she dotes on the puppy? She didn't put the leash there but at the same time...

Do you think Vertin would want to remove it? Isn't it a nice safeguard if Sonetto thinks she needs Vertin? If the puppy is happy, isn't it fine to keep the leash their so it doesn't wander too far? Maybe she'll let Sonetto break this habit on her own instead of giving her insight as usual.

Vertin asks for nothing, wants for nothing, and is always ready to share joy with others.

So can't she be a little selfish this time? Can't she have just one thing in her life that? She's already lost so much.

Is this post just an excuse to lay the groundwork for Toxic TK14 due to codependency??

Codependency: An unhealthy dependence on relationships. The co-dependent will do anything to hold on to a relationship; to avoid the feeling of abandonment. An extreme need for approval and recognition. A sense of guilt when asserting themselves. A compelling need to control others. Codependency is a circular relationship in which one person needs the other person, who in turn, needs to be needed