#worst Star Wars show in existence

[smilesrobotlover]

ok I have a question. Your brain seems to have a lot in common with mine. We clearly think about Zelda too much. In particular, we both seem obsessed with Twilight Princess side characters. And some recent posts have made it clear you love Star Wars to a degree too.

this is an idea I had a while ago but am not confident enough to draw— the Resistance, but the Bad Batch. Link as Echo, Rusl as Hunter, Ashei as Crosshair, Shad as Tech, maybe Telma as Wrecker (and Louise is her Lula), and maybe Zelda as Omega. no worries if you don’t take requests. But these thoughts live rent free in my head and it would look so good in your style

Oooh yes it’s a fun idea! I do not take requests and I hold a lot of resentment towards the bad batch unfortunately (I still haven’t seen season 2 but that’s mostly cuz I don’t have the motivation to watch it BDKSBSK) but I love teams like that <333

[merrysithmas]

anyone have any recs for EU Star Wars books/comics? i want to get more into it!

or any comic recs? open to new comics too if they dont veer jnto anything post Mando Season 2

[darklinaforever]

To those who say that The Acolyte cannot be the victim of racism-related hatred because of the main actors of Andor, Mandalorian and Ahsoka make me slowly laugh.

Diego Luna may be Mexican, but he's sort of white-skinned. Pedro Pascal is under a fucking mask the majority of the time, and Ahsoka may be an Afro Latina actress is a character who was basically one in the animation, being part of an alien race. Natasha Liu Bordizzo also plays a person who was originally in animation with a fanbase that already existed.

You may think that all this does not play a role in public perception, particularly racist in terms of their tolerance, but you are wrong (especially in the reception of an animated character compared to live action like with Sabine). On the contrary, it plays a huge role in their criticism. And precisely, thanks to that they can hide behind the excuse of not being racist.

Amandla is a black woman who play a completely new character. She pulls the triple hat for the worst of the worst in Star Wars fandom. Namely the sexist criticisms and the misogynistic criticisms, and criticizes of the untouchable Lore / what they think Star Wars is supposed to be, which all combine together.

Without forgetting that the one who makes the show is also a woman, a lesbian on top of that, who inevitably infuses her vision into Star Wars.

Stop acting like it doesn't matter.

And hiding behind the fact that many love Qimir and want the continuation of his story to make people believe that there is no racism linked to Amandla forgets some details on this subject.

Literally, these people completely remove the female character, Osha, from Qimir, while you can't tell his story by removing the girl. The characters work together and not separately. They don't understand that the essence of Qimir's character is linked to Osha. And obviously they don't understand that he's more complex than a Sith either.

These people who only focus on Many don't understand the character at all. Most also have misogynistic remarks towards Osha / Amandla.

So, frankly, taking those who specifically focus on Qimir as a standard to prove that there is no racism, only shows their incompetence in analysis and understanding of media, without forgetting the other horrible side that this show has had to face ; misogyny.

Be realistic, the show suffered a huge hate campaign well before its release and therefore the slightest trace of the storyline !

And yes, the storyline of The Acolyte is not perfect, but that is far from the main reason why the show is criticized ! A little realism and objectivity, please !

It's to the point that there is a counter-petition to prove that people don't want The Acolyte to be renewed, and sorry for the haters, but the numbers painfully prove you otherwise.

[lizardsfromspace]

What's the worst thing about fandom in the last 20 years, and what's the worst thing about fandom that's always been true of it?

The worst thing about fandom in the last 20 years has been the incentivizing of fandom-as-conflict: not merely as a field in broader culture wars but as the field for endless intra-group battles.

This manifests in many ways: as seven hour videos complaining about The Last Jedi, as Twitter backlash campaigns, but also as stans defending their faves from any and all criticism real or imagined, as the endless boom-and-backlash cycle to any fandom meme or joke you see on Reddit, and as the drive for people to look for evidence other people discussing a thing they like are hysterical illiterate dolts, before anything else.

Or, in other words: a lot of fandoms are full of assholes these days, whose main interaction with fandom is using it as a reason to be an asshole, and to defend being an asshole. The actual “fandom” part of fandom no longer really exists for them. The discourse more or less is their fandom; someone whose main fandom activity is sharing videos about how Steven Universe is a fascist (?) isn’t in the Steven Universe fandom, they’re in the videos about how Steven Universe is a fascist (?) fandom. I mean, the chief fandom for many people is their side in the fandom war. What type of fanfic you write is secondary to what your affiliations are vis-a-vis battles over fanfiction

(One trend I've noticed is people who aren't at the stage where they only talk about what they hate and not what they love, but are at the stage where they can only talk about what they love in relation to what they hate. "I love this movie...and it proves this other movie is bullshit made by a hack". No ability to say just "I love this movie", period, end of sentence. This is how like two-thirds of Film Twitter talks about film, the remainder are all the grindhouse people going "man you've GOT to see Wrong Turn 5")

Another one, that I think is related, is that fandom’s become...more transitory, maybe? There’s Big Fandoms that are inescapable and then everything else feels like it’s here for a weekend and then it’s gone. And we’ve always had fandoms that endure and fandoms that vanish quickly, when the show runs short or turns out to be bad/boring, but we did use to have a lot of enduring if small fandoms for Okay shows most people hadn’t heard of and now you don’t really. Or they burn themselves out fast.

So we’ve reached this stage where fandoms are either so big they have seven hour long discourse videos, or they’re a smattering of fanart over the course of two weeks last August. But that isn’t really the fault of fans so much as modern media release schedules.

A lot of fandom activities of old are just...impossible now, with many shows? The slow build of speculation and fan works and in-jokes and theorizing and analysis simply can’t exist in a world where the premiere comes out the same day as the finale, and you can’t talk about the finale because you have no way of knowing if the person you’re talking to binged it all in one weekend or is still on episode four. That was the kind of thing that sustained the fandom of something that wasn’t a big hit, or even something that was. My fave fandom experience ever was watching the online Lost fandom wildly theorizing for all six years of Lost, and we’d never get “and what if the Smoke Monster is a dinosaur but only the head?” under a Netflix release model. Now at a base level, we either have shows nobody can discuss because nobody’s sure who’s seen or what, or shows where everyone just discusses the finale right away, and where you get One Week of Show and then a massive hiatus, which either kills all momentum or...drives fandom in the direction of hyper-analyzing everything and fighting because, well, what else is there to do? And that plus the outrage cycles of social media plus the fact that “man who yells at Star Wars” is now a viable career choice result in, well. *gestures upwards* All that

(Really, shout out to Cartoon Network for engineering the Steven Universe fandom to Be Like That through their inscrutable strategy of dropping episodes during one random week every five months or whatever)

As for something that's always been with it...cliques and a certain fannish elitism, like, that sees engaging with media in a fandom sense as more creative or analytical or intelligent than your average person. You see it now in the form of, like, people holding up fanfic above published fiction as more representative or authentic (I’ve seen more than one post on here strongly implying queer rep doesn’t exist in mainstream non-fic storytelling???), or going “well, we think about shows, unlike those normies watching sports”. But that was probably way more pronounced a thing in the past, in the 40-50s sci-fi fans were calling non-fans "mundanes" and calling themselves "slans" as an in-group signifier (a reference to a book with superintelligent psychic mutants known as slans). Like at the very least we should be happy no one’s calling non-fans “muggles” anymore. In the evolution from “mundane” to “muggle” to “normie” normie’s probably the least bad one

[ghost-proofbaby]

twenty four hours (modern!eddie munson x fem!reader)

HOUR FOUR

in which eddie munson and you absolutely hate each other's guts. what happens when your friends make a bet that you can't spend more than twenty four hours consecutively together?

→ tropes: enemies to lovers, forced proximity, slow burn

→ warnings: strong language, eventual smut, upside down does not exist, minors dni

→ pairings: modern!college!eddie x college!fem!reader

→ wc: 3.8+

masterlist.

spotify playlist.

◁ previous part, next part▷

4:00 ──ㅇ──────────────── 24:00

BIRDIE created a groupchat. 

BIRDIE added DINGUS, NANCE, JOHNNY, & ARGYLE 😎

DINGUS: why the fuck is my name dingus

BIRDIE: so… are we going to talk about how in love they look in that photo?

NANCE: Eddie looks like he’s going to commit a federal crime, Robin.

DINGUS: how do i change my name

ARGYLE 😎: a sign of true love my friends

BIRDIE: @NANCE SEE? he gets it. 

JOHNNY: Is this chat really necessary? 

DINGUS: guys seriously. how the fuck do i change my name?

—

HOUR FOUR - 7:00 PM

Let the record show that you don’t normally care about Lord of the Rings. You’d seen the movies out of obligation to your friends, nothing more, nothing less. You usually held complete indifference towards the trilogy. As a matter of fact, you’d nearly given Robin an aneurysm the day you’d informed them all you preferred the Hobbit trilogy over the original movies. 

Eddie, it seems, holds a similar sentiment to Robin. 

“I can’t believe you just said that to me,” he sighs dramatically, sinking into the couch and looking far more comfortable than he had previously. A bottle of cheap beer dangles carelessly in his hand. He’d decided to grab both of you one the moment this argument had begun, “You casually bring up Gandalf, and then you proceed to have the worst opinions on the greatest franchise of all time. A crime against humanity.” 

“I’m sorry,” you say sincerely through genuine laughter. 

You were laughing. You were sitting on Eddie Munson’s couch, in his apartment, laughing with him rather than at him. It was a fluke in the system, a blip in the Universe. You tell yourself it’s just the effects of the beer. 

“What’s next? You tell me you prefer Star Wars over Star Trek? Or, let me guess, you’ve never read the books?” 

He looks nice like this, at ease. This hour might be setting the track record for the longest the two of you had gone without insulting one another, and you begin to wonder why you’d never been able to hold such a civil conversation with him before tonight. The two of you might not be agreeing or seeing completely eye to eye, but there was enough agreement to keep the entire debate chugging along. 

He notices your silence as you take a sip of the beer you’ve nearly polished off, smirking around the rim of it, a bit of beer lingering at the corner of your mouth. “Oh my God. You’ve never read the books.” 

“I never said that!”

“You never said you did!”

Your mouth is open, fighting back at the curl of the corners, unable to defend yourself because he was right. “I- Who even reads anymore?” 

“Excuse me?” his voice pitches as he sits up straight suddenly, “Oh, no. There’s no way you just said that. There’s no way you don’t read.” 

You shrug, and his beer is quickly set to the side. 

“C’mon, everyone reads. You’ve got to have a guilty pleasure book.” 

“Nope,” you tuck your bottle between your thighs, and catch the way his eyes had followed the bottle before snapping back to yours, “I just prefer the movies, I guess.” 

“No one prefers the movies. You’re a goddamn liar,” he shakes his head and some of the frizzy curls fall against his collar bones rather than continuing to tickle his shoulders, “You have to read something. Romance novels, boring essays, the news. Hell, even magazines or that written porn shi-” he cuts off when you smile at the mention of magazines. “Why are you smiling like that? Stop it. It’s creepy. Do you read those porno books?”

“God, no,” you laugh. A lie - you’d certainly read excerpts from Fifty Shades of Grey he was referencing to understand what the hype was to no prevail, “Just ironic you bring up magazines. You probably consider yourself a real connoisseur, don’t you?” 

He flushes crimson. His cheeks that had tinged pink from the warmth of the beer are now flaming red. “I have no idea what you mean.”

He clearly did. 

“Right,” you drawl, “So which article in that Playboy caught your eye? The one about the psychological deep dive into what makes sex so great, or the interview with that one porn star? No, wait, I got it! It was totally the one that gave fifteen ways to drive a girl crazy-”

“It’s not a fucking Seventeen magazine,” he snaps, but the malice in his voice is dull, “There’s no lists on how to get the girl, it’s a porn ‘zine, Jesus H. Christ.” 

“I know that, do you?” you press, reveling in the brush crawling its way down the side of his neck. 

He runs a hand over his face, groaning, “I’m not even going to entertain you with an answer. Fuck off.” 

“Do you just ignore all the photos of the beautiful women?” you don’t hold back your teasing, subconsciously leaning his way as your voice lilts with sarcasm, “Ignoring all those bushes? Or maybe you just prefer the Brazilian cut?” 

“I liked it better when we were talking about your illiteracy,” he deadpans, staring straight ahead at his entertainment center. 

“I never said I couldn’t read, just that I choose not to most of the time,” you finally pull back a bit, scared to push it all too far. You pull your legs up beneath you on the couch and move the beer that has gone warm to the table on the opposite end as his, “Sue me for trying to make friendly conversation.” 

You await his expected response about how this was not friendly conversation. You start to do mental gymnastics of a way to bring up the specific model he had marked the pages of, of the eerie resemblance she bears to you and a way to push his buttons regarding it. This conversation was following your script, not his.

Or at least, it was. 

“Fine. I prefer the bush, I always find the lack of hair kind of weird,” he says, throwing you off your game effectively. He stares at you with now expecting eyes, “What about you?”

You’re grateful you’d stopped nursing the beer, or you surely would have choked, “What?” 

“What’s your preference?” he clarifies, not backing down, “On yourself, on partners. Whatever.” 

“I- I don’t- I never-” you stumble over your words, at a complete loss for an answer. It only makes him smirk as he’s now the one leaning in closer, close enough to catch the smell of his cologne concentrated on him. 

You hadn’t realized you’d adjusted the boyish smell of the apartment until this very moment. 

“See? Not so fun when you’re the one getting asked the personal questions.” 

He’s right – you shouldn’t dish out what you can’t handle him throwing back into your face. 

“Fine,” you mimic him, squaring your shoulders, “Bush.”

“On yourself or others?” 

“Myself,” there was no use in being shy now, “But also on, uh, partners. Kind of unfair to expect something from someone I wouldn’t give in return.” 

He nods in surprising consideration at the notion. His face twists as if he’s taking words you’d thrown out there so carelessly to heart, as if there’s some hidden message that even you hadn’t realized was laced in the notion. For a moment, you start to believe he’s committing the words to memory before he answers you. 

“That’s fair,” is all he says. 

A moment of intense thought for that?

“What? That’s all you’ve got to say?” you scoff, and busy yourself with the beer again out of nerves. It’s warm and bitter on your tongue, but it’s better than looking him in the eyes. Warm, honey eyes you’d never really cared to notice before.

“Yeah,” he lifts his shoulders into an offhand shrug, “I mean, what else is there to say? Like you said, you can’t expect something from someone you can’t return.” 

Another silence drags out, and this time, it’s stifling. You never thought you’d live to see the day where Eddie being quiet would bother you, but it does. The lack of words in the air is leaving too much room for thought from both of you. It’s giving you too much time to think on those warm, honey eyes and those damn dimples. Trivial things about Eddie that you don’t care to remember past tonight. 

“My friend collects vintage Playboys,” you blurt out, internally cursing yourself immediately. What a stupid conversation segway. 

Should have teased him about the dog-eared pages, you regretfully think as you dare to look his way. 

His face is surprisingly smooth, eyebrows quirking up into the frayed edges of his bangs, “Oh really?”

You nod, “Yeah. Hell of a lot more bushes in the seventies.” 

A lot less of that model you like, you silently add, once more not voicing that concern out loud.

The dimples return. Those fucking dimples. “Hm, guess I should check them out, then.” 

“She collects them for aesthetic purposes,” you continue to ramble, filling the air, unsure of why you’re even defending yourself. You’re just waiting for the other shoe to drop, for Eddie to dissect the small piece of your life you’ve offered, “It’s… It’s really cool, actually.”  

“It sounds cool,” he agrees gently. 

The other shoe is left dangling in the air, if it even continues to exist. 

You think about his earlier question, of whether you really wanted to keep up a miserable act for the entire twenty four hours. If the last hour hadn’t already solidified your answer, you knew now for a matter of fact that he had a point, even if he did proceed to insult you after the question. You didn’t want to spend this time miserable. The passing of time came easier when it was like this, all rounded-edged banter and friendly words exchanged. When Eddie Munson wasn’t being an asshole and making personal digs at you, he was actually a nice person to have around. 

You’d never tell him that, of course.

“It’s why I collect all that,” he motions his hand towards the shelving of figurines and trinkets, “I just think it’s cool, you know? I… Uh, I sort of lied earlier. Most of that shit isn’t that expensive. But it’s not about how much it’s worth money-wise, it’s just worth a lot to… to me.” 

A glimpse of crimson, a flash of vulnerability that proves that Eddie has a heart just as you do. It beats erratically, and it can bleed just the same. 

“That makes sense,” you offer in response. You may not get it, but you wouldn’t push his buttons on the topic. They may be nothing but clutter from your perspective, but the same could be said about the vintage Playboys your friend collects. The same could be said about plenty of things that are sentimental to you. “Doesn’t it get creepy, though? Like, you bring home a girl-”

“Or a guy,” he interjects, making you smile. 

“You bring home a girl, or a guy, and you’ve just got Gandalf staring you down while you make a move. Or… Or, Darth Vader?” you squint to pinpoint another figurine, “Is that Darth Vader? Didn’t you say Star Trek is better than Star Wars?” 

“Never said that,” he points at you with a tilt of his head, “I just don’t prefer Star Wars over Star Trek.”

“Have you seen Star Wars? It’s way more entertaining.” 

“Have you seen Star Trek?” he counters, but it’s clearly rhetorical as he continues on, “I like both. Having a preference for one doesn’t mean I’m completely against the other. Besides, the light saber effects are fucking incredible.” 

“So you prefer the prequels?” you ask eagerly. 

“I guess. I mean, the original trilogy is still badass and a classic,” he stands abruptly, and you’re worried you’ve said something wrong, but he just walks over to the Darth Vader figurine to pick it up and bring it back over with him as he flings down onto the couch, now several spaces closer to you rather than opposing ends, “It’s kind of hard to beat the ‘Luke, I am your father’ reveal,” his voice dips down to a deep tone, a fairly spot on impersonation, “But it was also nice seeing his origin story.” 

“Plus Ewan McGregor and Hayden Christensen are gorgeous,” you add, almost daring to lean over and bump shoulders with him. But you don’t. You keep what little space remains between the two of you. 

“Of course,” Eddie rolls his eyes, “The eye candy is what gets you.” 

“And the cool effects!”

“Right. Next you’re going to say you definitely watched for the plot, huh?”

“Oh, absolutely.”

“And the plot’s name just happens to be Ewan.” 

You bite down the grin that starts to ache your cheeks, because you’re not supposed to smile around Eddie this much. “Now you’re getting it.” 

The hand holding the Darth Vader figurine suddenly thrusts out in your direction, and you find yourself jumping a bit. When you don’t take it, he waves it around a bit, raising an eyebrow, “It doesn’t bite, you know.” 

“You said to not touch your shit.”

It’s a pathetic lie, you both know it. But he doesn’t know how scared you are to brush fingertips with him, how the way his arm being so close has electricity buzzing from the soles of your feet to the crown of your head. One small shift, one outreached hand, and your skin would brush his. 

It would surely be nuclear. An explosion with no survivors, least of all you. 

“Oh, c’mon. You’ve disregarded that rule the entire time, why start being a goody two shoes now?” he teases. 

Which is fine, except Eddie teases a certain way – with his entire body. His knee knocks into yours, he leans into your space, a boyish grin spreads over his lips. You’ve seen him dance around this kind of lighthearted conversation with everyone else in your friend group except you. It’s uncharted territory, and your heart nearly breaks out of your chest from its rapid racing.

You’re just lucky that there’s two layers of jeans between your knees. The nuclear explosion will have to wait for another day.

Instead of an answer, you reach out and grab the figurine nimbly by the small leg. Your fingertips narrowly evade Eddie’s and you’re eternally grateful and his arm retracts. You poke and prod, gently wiggling the red, flexible stick that serves as his lightsaber and pinch at the edges of his cape. 

In your silence, Eddie speaks, “It’s not a crazy collectible or anything, like I said. It probably would have been more valuable to keep it in its packaging, but one time Wheeler brought his little sister over while they were in town, and she wanted to see him out of the box, so I took him out. You know Wheeler, right?” 

You shake your head, inspecting the figurine even closer now. It still looks brand new; you’d never be able to tell that a child, presumably, had played with the ‘toy’. 

“Oh,” Eddie looks taken back, faltering slightly, “Sorry, I- I just sort of assumed that…. You, uh…. You had met Steve’s children.” 

“Oh!” your head shoots up from where your nose had been nearly pressed into the figure, taking in the detailing of the chest piece, “You mean Mike? I’ve heard about him, yeah. Just in passing, though.”

There’s more for Eddie to say, it’s clear in the way his mouth falls open with the corners quirked, but then you’re interrupted by a phone ringing. 

Your phone. 

Steve’s contact photo occupies the screen for the second time tonight, a ridiculous photo of him scowling at the camera in a yellow jumper while holding a can of pringles in front of him, one of his hands bringing a single chip to his pouting lips. 

“Let me answer it,” Eddie insists, holding out his hand as you stare down at the phone, still chiming annoyingly. 

“Were they supposed to call this often?” you ask, knowing well enough that Eddie didn’t have the answer. 

His hand waves in impatience, and you don’t put up a fight as you let him take the phone and swipe the answering bar, focusing instead on the Darth Vader discarded into your lap as he puts the call on speaker. 

“Hello?” Eddie answers in a chirpy tone. 

“How many times do we have to te- hold on. Munson?” Steve starts off aggressive, but his tone melts into confusion, “Why the hell are you answering her phone?” 

“Because I’ve murdered her,” he flatly replies, but his face doesn’t match his tone at all. 

He fucking winks at you. Your grip on Darth Vader tightens until you’re afraid you're about to snap it. 

“Not funny.”

“Not a joke.”

“Where is she, Eddie?” Steve sighs like an irritated parent, in no mood for games, “Please tell me you didn’t manage to make her lock herself in a room again.” 

“I told you. She’s gone. Sacrificed to the Dark Lord or whatever. Just got to go dump her body in the lake-”

You shouldn’t joke along with him, but you still whisper the correction of, “The canals.” 

“Sorry, I mean the canals.”

Another deep sigh. You can picture the way Steve was currently pinching the bridge of his nose at the two of you. 

“I heard her, you idiot. Now that we know you’re both clearly alive and well…. Where the hell is our photo proof?” 

You both share a look, and you quickly mouth, already?  

Eddie shrugs and mouths back, I guess. 

“We lost track of time,” you finally say out loud, still locked in eye contact with Eddie. His brown eyes are surprisingly captivating, several autumn shades all woven together. Burnt orange leaves, red apples, brown sweaters. You never thought you’d be able to see a season in someone’s irises, yet here you were, picturing it clear as day. “Let us hang up and we’ll send the photo.” 

Steve starts to speak, but Eddie’s thumb is quick to end the call. The moment your lock screen stares back at both of you, you look at the time. 

7:41. Shit. 

“Oops,” Eddie whispers as he hands the phone back over, “They really gave us quite the grace period that time.” 

“Yeah,” you breathe out, quickly opening your damn camera app. “So, how do we want to do this one?” 

Eddie thinks for a moment before he launches himself back to his side of the couch, and motions for you to toss him your phone. 

And once again, you put your faith in him, not even hesitating this time. 

It happens naturally; you both mirror each other, drawing up your knees, your sock-clad toes bumping firmly against one another. Your back is supported by the worn arm behind you, similar to how Eddie’s is, as you face him. 

He quickly angles the camera towards you, sticking a hand out into the frame while raising his middle finger. You don’t know what to do, so one hand holds up the Darth Vader as the other mimics flipping him off. 

A soft click from your phone. The photo’s taken, and you’re not even sure if you were smiling. 

“Trade,” he leans forward, one hand holding out your phone, the other reaching out for Darth Vader. 

You oblige, and go through the same process for his photo. His white socks contrast your black ones, and the corners of his lips twitch upwards no matter how hard of a line he presses them into. You can’t look at him directly, and settle for watching him through the screen as you hit the small grey button to snap the photo. 

Just as quickly as he had shoved away from you, he’s back at your side, watching you send off the photos to the group chat with a thumbs up emoji. You take a deep breath, scanning over the pair of photos until it’s confirmed that they’re delivered, and lock your phone. Your brows are furrowed in your reflection staring back at you through the black screen. 

“Do you really want to keep up the miserable act the entire twenty four hours?” Eddie’s voice echoes in your mind. 

No, you don’t. No matter how wrong this levity with Eddie feels, no matter how uncomfortable it is each time you remember that he’s meant to be the enemy and not someone to share laughter and smiles with, you don’t want to waste these remaining twenty hours being miserable. 

“What’s up?” Eddie’s actual voice echoes in real time as you continue to stare at your reflection.

“Just thinking,” you grunt. The thought of admitting your decision to Eddie is much more intimidating than simply acknowledging it to yourself. 

“Dangerous.” 

Instead of quipping something rude back, you decide to be vulnerable with Eddie. You decide to crack yourself open just a small bit, just as he had done microscopically when he spoke of his collection of items. It’s a dangerous gamble, and you don’t give yourself the chance to overthink it. 

“You were right, earlier,” you force the words out, fighting the way they try to cling onto your tongue and remain safely in your throat. 

“About… what?” He looks distrusting, and for good reason. He said plenty of things earlier - you could be preparing to remind him of any number of rude things he’d spewed. 

“About keeping up the miserable act,” you explain, turning your head to him and abandoning the phone, “You were right. I don’t want to be miserable this entire time. It… It goes by faster when we’re not about to strangle each other, believe it or not.” 

You swear you see his shoulders sag in relief. “Well, yeah, I could have told you that. I did tell you that, actually.” 

“Shut up,” you force a scowl, “My point is… I don’t know, maybe, we could try to- try to just- we could be-”

“Civil?” he finishes the sentence you stumble over. 

You nod, “Yeah. We could be civil.”

The word feels foreign on your tongue. Civility was not something you’d ever considered with Eddie, but the last hour had proven it to be possible. 

“Okay,” he nods along with you. He turns his entire body to face you, knees once again bumping as he sticks out a hand for you to shake, “Deal. We will try to be civil the rest of the time.” 

“Civil,” you repeat yourself again, more sure this time, still staring at his offered hand.

An olive branch. The opportunity to work together to survive the next twenty hours. The opportunity for his bare skin against yours. 

You think again of nuclear explosions and pulsing electricity, of open chests and matching scarlets, of smashing glasses against walls and ruined parties, of wounds healing over in scar tissues as they glow a gentle pink.

Civil. You wonder if that’s one of the words they’ll include on your gravestone as you reach out your hand and let Eddie’s palm meet yours. 

taglist: @catherinnn @haylaansmi @gaysludge @paprikaquinn @manda-panda-monium @audhd-dragonaut @amira0303 @blushingquincy @hellkaisersangel @eddieslittlewh0re @ajkamins @prettyboy200 @munsonzzgf @blue-eyed-lion @digwhatudug @madaboutjoe @wickedslashdivine @sweet-villain @somespicystuff @big-ope-vibes @jadequeen88 @sylviin @emma77645 @notbeforelong @lolalanaie @lo-siento-ama @happy-and-alone @micheledawn1975 @aysheashea @moon-huny @munsonswrld @bambipowerblueaddition @averagestudent03 @bakugouswh0r3 @mattefic @mxcheese @bietchz @nativity-in-black @tlclick73 @stezzil @vngelis @coley0823 @folklorebau @luvmunson86 @theherothesavior @keene200213 @hargrovesswifee @m-chmcl-rmnc @cherrymedicine13 @iunaelumen777

taglist is now closed.

[444st4rg1rl]

Shooting my star 🌟I need you to do SFW and NSFW alphabet for our man Wolverine/Logan Howlett 👁️🫦👁️ I NED HIM CARNALLY AND EMOTIONALLY ( he is my confort character and I need it bc I’ve been really sad this days🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹) anyway have a nice day, evening, or night!!!!!! 💗💗💗💗💗 appreciate your work ☺️☺️💕💕💕💕💕😚😚😚

★ a/n: tysm babes! Hope you cheer up soon hun & hope u enjoy this! ★

★a/n pt2: Alphabet but it only goes up to D & E, bc i wrote this rlly quick on mobile! ★

★Nsfw!

A = ★ Aftercare ★ (what they’re like after sex)

★Right after Logan’s immediately gentle. Grabbing whatever shirt he see first on the floor and wiping the mess on and inbetween your legs. Letting your pretty head rest for as long as you want on his chest while he plays with your hair.

He’ll walk with you the bathroom turning on the shower and sometimes he’ll join you or other times he’ll perch himself on the seat of the toilet listening to you hum to yourself.

B = ★ Body Part ★ (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

★Ass or hips guy easily, he loves grabbing the soft flesh of your ass and pulling the skin, smacking it to hear the sound and watch the way it jiggles from the recoil. Loves your hips and loves grabbing onto them in doggy or riding him, leaving finger prints in your hips from his tight grab, he just think it’s such a perfect fit.

Now you on the other hand, his armsare your favorite. Watching his muscled arms flex while stretching, making him grab any heavy boxes and whatnot has you wild, like you love it. Having the muscles in his arms flex and pull as he thrusting into you is what makes you cum the fastest.

C = ★ Cum ★ (anything to do with cum, basically)

★he’s a feral animal sometimes, so the breeding kink is self explanatory. Logan just loves any reason to fill you up and have you stay like that.

He’ll fuck you over and over until he thinks you’re filled enough to the brim with his cum. Then once he’s done he’ll stay like that for a bit having his dick stay inside of you to keep the cum from spilling out

D = ★ Dirty Secret ★ (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

★back to him being a feral animal yk, he’s got all these heightened senses, especially smell so the second your sweet scenting perfume hits his nose he can’t stop wanting to smell you.

Shoving his nose into your neck sometimes when he just wants to smell the comfort of his lover will have him rock hard by accident. Catching a whiff of your sweet perfume on his clothes and he needs to calm his dick down.

During sex?? ooo boy, your just kissing on his lap but once he smells your arousal pool in your panties he jumping straight into action.

E = ★ Experience ★ (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

★ well for starters he’s 200 years old by time you meet him in the school. Having been through multiple wars and eras hes definitely got around. I don’t even wanna think how high his body count is but it’s up there.

He definitely knows exactly what he’s doing, he knows how to make you feel so good it’s scary because not even you yourself can do that for you.

★ !

★ sfw!

A = ★Affection ★ (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

★ X-Men!Logan is really just a depends on the scenario type of guy. Existing? hand on the waist or arm across your shoulders. Jealous? pressed closed as possible too you. cooking? arms wrapped around your waist while letting his head hit your shoulder blades. he’s always finding some excuse to touch you.

Worst!Wolverine logan is hard as hell to touch, but i definitely feel once you reach past his hard as interior he’s giving slight but there touches.

B = ★ Best friend ★ (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

★X-Men!Logan is a dope ass best friend. Your definitely friends from having similar fighting styles and matching each others attitudes.

Drinking buddy? he’s there immediately. Sparring? anytime of the day. Fucking around with scott? already besides you.

Overall he’d be a chill best friend who’s definitely a ride or die.

C = ★ Cuddling ★ (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

★YES, yk he likes to be big spoon wrapping his big arms around you keeping you close. Or he likes you laying on his chest one arm around you the other puffing in his cigar.

D = ★Domestic ★ (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

★He definitely likes to come home to domesticated life but he’s would really be the one cooking or cleaning. But trust he loves coming home and seeing you make some sort of dinner that night and coming to stand behind you to watch.

[lcdrarry]

LCDrarry 2024 Master List Part 2: More Fic

Dear lovely Participants, Creators, Alpha and Beta Readers, Cheerleaders, Readers and Fans of this fest,

The 6th installment of LCDrarry has come to an end, and we'd like to thank you all for taking part in this fest, for creating so many amazing new Drarry works for us all to enjoy, for commenting on your favourite creations, for sharing and recommending the LCDrarry gems with and to your friends and blog followers, and for making this fest another amazing experience for everybody!

Fests would not exist without their participants or readers! You're all amazing! And we're so happy that you chose this fest in the vast and wonderful offerings of HP and Drarry events.

You can find out under the cut who created what ;D

~Your LCDrarry Mods Tami (@celilasart) and Suzi (@erin-riwen)

PS: Please have a look at the author notes and tags on AO3 for additional information and more detailed warnings. Thank you! PPS: You can find a link to Part 1 of this Master List under the cut. Enjoy!

Part 1 of this Master List with all the lovely podfics, art and more fics can be found here.

***

More Fic

***

If The Boxers Fit (A Cinderella Story)

Prompt: "100 Girls", 2000 Author: lettersbyelise Word Count: 8,360 words Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Summary: When Draco ends up shagging a hot, mysterious stranger in a broken Ministry lift and is left with nothing but a sexy pair of red boxers to remember them by, Draco’s friends go sleuthing.

***

surviving the mist

Prompt: "The Mist", 2017, TV Show Author: gnarf Word Count: 7,153 words Rating: Mature Warnings: one homophobic slur, Uncanny Valley, Blood, Trauma Bonding, mentions of past starvation, hinted at child abuse, Torture (off screen), Post-War, Minor pining, Clueless Harry Potter, Happy Ending, Sharing a Bed, involuntary housemates, Inspired by The Mist - Stephen King, LCDrarry 2024

Summary: Everything was perfect for Harry, until Draco moved into the cottage next door. He thought that Draco Malfoy being his neighbour was the worst that could happen to him. Until the outside world got turned into a death zone. Trapped by a mysterious fog, Harry and Draco have to try and get along while surviving the nightmares hiding outside, waiting, luring...

***

Listening to the Manor

Prompt: "Spirited Away", 2001, Hayao Miyazaki Author: meandminniemcg Word Count: 11,183 words Rating: Teen and up Warnings: No archive warnings apply

Summary: When Dudley gets turned into a bird on a roadtrip, Harry has to save his cousin. He meets a mysterious blond man and a sentient manor house that needs his help. But first he has to do his new job at the Magical Creature spa, the only reason he can stay...

***

Twin Blades

Prompt: “Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith”, 2005, George Lucas Author: lucio Word Count: 3,525 words Rating: Teen and up Warnings: lightsaber combat, nightmares

Summary: Harry advances a few steps toward Draco, who doesn’t move, only watches him approach with narrowed eyes. “If you’re so sure the Jedi have no power, duel me. If you win, your master will be proud of you.” Draco’s eyes glitter. “And if you win?” “We’ll find out, won’t we?” Harry raises his lightsaber, readies himself. “Come on.” Without another word, Draco lunges at him.

Or, a Drarry-flavored reskin of the battle on Mustafar.

***

Hope Is A Thing With Feathers

Prompt: "Thelma and Louise", 1991, Ridley Scott Author: Stillwriting Word Count: 33,335 words Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator chose not to use Archive Warnings

Summary: Harry is disillusioned with the Aurors, his relationship with Ginny, and is tired of all the hero worship but feels trapped. Draco, still hated by the Wizarding world, decides to get away and shares his plan with Harry, his only friend. Harry jumps at the chance to go with him.

They share in the freedom of their adventure, but things don’t go according to plan. Amidst their misfortunes, they discover new talents, courage in the face of tragedy, and above all, love.

***

Slipping through my fingers all the time

Prompt: "Mamma Mia", 2008, Phyllida Lloyd Author: TheGoblinMatriarch Word Count: 11,378 words Rating: Teen and Up Warnings: sex while on drugs, drinking

Summary: Recently-divorced Harry returns to Serenity Commune, site of his wildest youthful romps and the beginning of his recovery from trauma, to get out of a rut (and because Hermione made him). Unfortunately, sex, drugs, and dancing aren't all that await - he'll have to confront his past and what life might have been.

***

Romancing the Dragon

Prompt: "Romancing the Stone", 1984, Robert Zemeckis Author: jtimu Word Count: 34,382 words Rating: Explicit Warnings: Action movie typical violence

Summary: Harry Potter writes romance novels from the comfort of his London townhouse, with the assistance of his beloved cat, Juliet. He does not engage in rescue missions, talk to dragons, or develop feelings for Draco Malfoy. That would be absurd.

***

first, she fell

Prompt: "Anatomy of a Fall", 2023, Justine Triet Author: luminae Word Count: 1,648 words Rating: Mature Warnings: angst, referenced character death, open ending, referenced adultery, speculated murder

Summary: Harry's wife is dead. No one knows quite what that means.

***

Caribou Garden

Prompt: Nature Documentaries (genre, any year) Author: CreepingMyrtle Word Count: 2,641 words Rating: Teen and up Warnings: None

Summary: Alone with his swotty, posh, nemesis-turned-colleague on an uninhabited island in the far north, cinematographer Harry Potter grapples with his inconvenient crush. A nature documentary-inspired fic with magical caribou migrations, dramatic landscapes, and only one tent.

***

Leap Year

Prompt: "Leap Year", 2010, Anand Tucker Author: youhavemyswordandmybow Word Count: 29,064 words Rating: Mature Warnings: None apply.

Summary: Draco Malfoy has come a long way. He has a successful business and a muggle-born high-flyer boyfriend.

One tiny thing - it's been four years and he has no ring. No matter, he'll take things into his own hands. Feb 29th is an Irish muggle tradition that he'll happily jump on. Archie (boyfriend) is in Ireland - he'll simply portkey over and pop the question.

One (LARGE) problem. The portkey office messed up and he's landed outside Harry Potter's pub.

The same Harry Potter that hasn't been seen for ten years.

*Big sigh.*

***

Runaway Groom

Prompt: "Runaway Bride," 1999, Garry Marshall Author: skotini Word Count: 30,044 words Rating: Teen and up Warnings: Arranged marriage (not between Harry and Draco), Infidelity if you squint (not between Harry and Draco)

Summary: OK, so Draco's feeling so nervous about his upcoming wedding to his fiancée Astoria Greengrass that he could faint. That's one of the pitfalls of an arranged marriage, right? Just because he's run out of his past three weddings, doesn't mean this one won't go ahead. He just has to keep his eyes on the finishing line, and ignore the sudden reappearance of Harry Potter, who seems to be determined to turn his world upside down. Again.

***

we were born to be national treasures

Prompt: "Legally Blonde", 2001, Robert Luketic Author: calledityellow Word Count: 4,979 words Rating: General Audiences Warnings: There is nothing triggering in the work, although it does heavily rely on the subject of needing academic validation as a woman in a patriarchal society.

Summary: Danica Malfoy is determined to study law and move forward in life. But is anything really ever that simple?

***

The Potters: Possessed Case

Prompt: "The Conjuring", 2013, James Wan Author: Nelween Word Count: 12,039 words Rating: Mature Warnings: Horror, blood, vomiting, mention of suicide, possession, exorcism

Summary: After a lecture, Harry and Draco meet a frightened woman, telling them that her entire family is scared to death of their new house.

But Harry and Draco wanted to take a break after a traumatising case. Maybe it's just natural causes and the house isn't haunted, right?

***

By the Book

Prompt: "The Proposal", 2009, Anne Fletcher Author: Olena Word Count: 14,586 words Rating: Teen and up Warnings: None

Summary: It’s hard being Draco Malfoy: workaholic publishing professional extraordinaire. Between revolutionizing the Wizarding World and fighting with Harry Potter, his chief of staff, it makes sense Draco forgot to check his mother filed some paperwork. Oops. Easy enough to avoid deportation by saying he’s engaged to said manager.

Too bad that plan involves visiting Ottery St Catchpole, a gaggle of redheads, and defrauding the government.

***

this strange effect

Prompt: "Killing Eve" (2018 - 2022) Author: harDeehar Word Count: 30,670 words Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic Violence, Blood and Injury, Assassinations, Killing Eve AU, Murder, Light Poisoning, Obsessive Behavior, Reference to past addiction issues, Presents

Summary: Harry hated his job, his cousin, and his inability to figure out how to fit into the boring, depressing world around him. He kept his peace until Draco Malfoy turned out to not be dead like Harry thought he was. Deadly, though? Harry was going to figure that out.

***

The Heart of the Heart

Prompt: "Howl's Moving Castle", 2004, Hayao Miyazaki Author: Poljupci Word Count: 52,775 words Rating: Teen and up Warnings: None

Summary: Harry Potter’s boring routine comes crumbling down when he takes the wrong shortcut at the wrong time; he almost ends up in a brawl, gets rescued by a handsome stranger, successfully escapes sentient tar, learns to walk on air and then becomes victim to a spiteful, petty and undeserved ageing curse - and all that within a single afternoon! Now transformed into an old man, Harry decides to run away in search of a way to reverse the spell, but the path is precarious and the journey long. As he's trying to make his way through magic and treachery, danger and deceit, it's becoming abundantly clear that something more is hidden behind petty magic - something deeper and more valuable and connected all too thoroughly to what may only be classified as love.

***

End of Beginnings

Prompt: "All of Us Strangers", 2023, Andrew Haigh Author: LouisIsSoGolden Word Count: 5,324 words Rating: Explicit Warnings: Canonical Character Death

Summary: As Harry and Draco start developing a relationship, Harry finds himself drawn back to the Potter house in Godric's Hollow, where his parents appear to be living just as they were on the day they died.

Based on the movie All of Us Strangers (2023) though you don't have to have seen it to understand the fic.

***

Love Will Abide

Prompt: "The Last of Us", Episode 3: "Long, Long Time", 2023 Author: dodgerkedavra Word Count: 39,547 words Rating: Explicit Warnings: Major Character Death, Suicide

Summary: Harry and Draco survive the apocalypse. This is what happens after.

***

Theme and Variations

Prompt: "Rush", 2013, Ron Howard Author: lucifergraced Word Count: 24,890 words Rating: Mature Warnings: brief mentions of (canonical) child abuse

Summary: Draco had fucked him over, yet again. Harry was sick of it.

With music swelling from the orchestra below, lights beating down on him hard enough to break a sweat before the first variation, the audience rapt with attention, this should have been the greatest moment of Harry’s life. But it wasn’t. Of course Draco fucking Malfoy had to ruin this for him too.

Harry took a shaking breath and began to dance.

***

Happiness Seems to be Loneliness

Prompt: "Saltburn", 2023, Emerald Fennell Author: newskyillusion Word Count: 29,811 words Rating: Explicit Warnings: Unhinged Harry Potter, Dark Harry Potter, Obsessive Harry Potter, Character Death, Animal Death, Fat Shaming, Minor Character Death, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Inspired by Saltburn (2023), References to Frankenstein, Necrophilia, Off-scene suicide (mentioned)

Summary: Fucking Pansy was like fucking a fish. or Drarry meets Saltburn

***

Count On Me

Prompt: "Put Your Head On My Shoulder", 2019, Netflix Author: Shewhxmustnxtbenamed Word Count: 23,044 words Rating: General Audiences Warnings: fake dating, forced cohabitation

Summary: University students Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy run into each other one day. Literally. On bikes. After that, they can't get away from each other, no matter how hard they try. And then, it seems, they might not want to. Based heavily on the C-Drama "Put Your Head On My Shoulder" on Netflix.

***

Part 1 of this Master List with all the lovely podfics, art and more fics can be found here.

As always, reblogs here on tumblr are very much appreciated to promote all the wonderful works of LCDrarry. But of course, please also shower our creators with comments and kudos on AO3 ;D Thank you! Read you next year ;)

[infiniteglitterfall]

the worst part about the i/p discourse

it's NOT the posters of Nazis with the swastikas on their flags replaced by stars of david. or the pages and pages of blood libel conspiracy theories in instagram posts about why local pride organizers are such big meanies. or the newfound insistence that jews just exaggerate and make up antisemitic incidents to smear the pro-palestine movement....

it's the fact that every. single. time. i try to post anything about any of these things, i end up in a rabbit hole SO DEEP IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO GET TO THE BOTTOM.

Yesterday, I saw a --

YOU SEE? I went to Reddit for a second to find the link to the post about the Melbourne protest this week that had people carrying the Nazi-star-of-David posters. But first, I saw a post that began, "All I see on social media and the news is more and more attacks. Who beat up a Jewish family here, who stabbed a 1 year old in front of a synagouge. Those are two examples, I've lost track of all of the other ones."

and I was like, SOMEONE STABBED A ONE YEAR OLD IN FRONT OF A SYNAGOGUE?!?!

And I started to look that up. AND THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENS. EVERY SINGLE TIME.

Two days ago, I saw an article about Cincinnati Socialists setting up a table at North Kentucky Pride without asking, it sounds like, to hand out flyers saying the war in Gaza was Netanyahu's "Final Solution" for Palestinians. Cincinnati Pride organizers alerted the NKY Pride organizers, who kicked them out.

I was like, "okay, well, let's see what Cincinnati Socialists say about it." Then I discovered that their instagram not only "names and shames" the two Cincy Pride organizers and one NKY organizer. Which led to the Cincy ones getting so much harassment and violent threats that they resigned....

But also has a related post that goes on for pages and pages of pure blood libel.

So then I sat there fact-checking all their blood libel and finding out that not only was it untrue and impossible, but half the stuff they referenced didn't even exist.

Then I ended up fact-checking things in the "article" that they'd clearly used as their source. Fact-checking things I found while fact-checking those.

Trying to write a Facebook post about how fucked up it all was. Giving up on the Facebook post after several hours because it made more sense to write it on Tumblr, or at least to write it on Tumblr FIRST.

Then I'm also looking at the post they made "naming and shaming" the organizers, which is like... "the Cincy ones are partners! two days after Hamas's incredibly violent and brutal massacre, one of them changed his profile picture to a photo of them honeymooning IN ISRAEL two years ago! they did it through some group that COVERS A LOT OF THE COSTS FOR HONEYMOONS IN ISRAEL!!!!" and "the other one went to a protest of Hamas's massacre!!! with a sign saying to free the hostages!!!"

oh no. the fucking horror. truly how did these genocidal monsters even end up on the pride organizing committee. this is a shanda scandal.

then I'm responding to people's comments, trying to talk them down from horrible positions. telling people things like, "I know it's asking a LOT, but if people could grasp the idea that "going to Israel for your honeymoon" ISN'T "committing genocide," it would be really great. Or that wanting the hostages freed is actually something that both Israeli AND GAZAN protests have called for, and it's only Westerners who are opposed to it. Or that in fact, saying you "Stand with Israel," a few days after an incredibly brutal attack that burned multiple towns to the ground in one day, killed entire families and their pets, an attack which Hamas has promised to repeat "again and again and again" till Israel is violently destroyed... is opposing that attack, NOT calling for genocide."

then i'm like, "oh, i should edit these images to show the correct info, and i can explain that I drew arrows and added the correct info!" so then i'm doing that and working on writing alt text, and holy shit??? how many fucking hours??? did i spend on this?????? just because i read a frigging reddit post that linked to an article about it?????????

and like. i can go through and debunk all that shit in the comments. (and did. i responded to every single comment that believed this shit.) but ultimately, everyone who pulls this shit has way more reach than I do.

just. like. THAT'S ONE ORG IN ONE PLACE. And it was bad enough that I persevered and finished debunking it and commenting on it today and started telling people about it. Do you even know how many more of those I've seen?! How many I would see if I looked for them on purpose?!

The tsunami of deliberate disinformation is SO FUCKING BAD. All of it is SO FUCKING LAYERED. In any single bullshit post, there are SO MANY horrifically bad and wrong assumptions. So many of them are DESIGNED, BY HAMAS, to lead people down the path to "All Zionists should die! Israel should be violently destroyed!"

There were so many comments on a "Free Palestine Melbourne" group's instagram post (Sydney? Could've been Sydney) asking, pointedly, how many Jews are Zionists. What percentage of Jews are Zionists, again?

One (1) had a response telling them it doesn't matter what the percentage is, no percentage would justify collective punishment of Jews.

The rest all said things like, "Too many."

It feels like constantly being lied to. Just constantly being lied to about things I have looked up and verified myself from solid sources, now and in the past, by people I counted as my community.

Then just now I opened Instagram because I hadn't taken screenshots of a couple of the pics I wanted to add. And I'm hit with these:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by jewsinschool (@jewsinschool)

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Jewish on Campus (@jewishoncampus)

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Jewish and Proud (@jewishpridealways)

Then some brighter posts (including one of a baby bat!!) and then a post which sums up a lot of what I'm feeling right now.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Jess Cook (@jessicagcoook)

It's like, yes, that, plus the uncomfortable sense that some people are getting thisclose to going, "Most Jews are Zionists anyway, so YEAH, I DO think most Jews deserve to die."

[antianakin]

Satine is one of the most frustrating characters of all time because she seems like she should be an enjoyable, interesting, complex character. She's got one of the most interesting backstories of any character I've ever met, and I'd LOVE more of THAT story (not the on the run with Obi-Wan bit, that bit can get left out, but the bit where she has to somehow bring together an entire population of warring people who just nearly destroyed their own planet due to years of fighting and a civil war that just killed her father and she managed to convince them into a peaceful, pacifist lifestyle while she was only a teenager). The level of strength and competency that this would require of her is INSANE.

I want to know more about where this prime minister came from, whether he was ACTUALLY elected or if Satine chose him, whether the position existed prior to Satine or if she created it, and what the actual difference is between Satine's role as a ruling duchess who inherited her role through birth and the prime minister. I want to know more about Satine's relationship with her father and with Bo-Katan. I want to know more about where the fuck Korkie came from and how Satine ended up with him and what happened to this mysterious third Kryze sibling that is presumably Korkie's parent.

And the concept of Satine as this person who was raised in a culture of war and violence and who, at a pretty young age, insistently chose to follow the opposite ideology of pacifism, and how these two very differing things impact her as a leader is INTERESTING. Satine as someone who struggles with an instinct towards violence and arrogance because it's how she was raised but who WANTS to be calm and reasonable and peaceful and strives towards this ideal as much as possible even though she doesn't always achieve it is INTERESTING. Satine as someone who clings to her pacifist ideology so hard that it becomes a fault of its own sometimes (by causing her to REFUSE to see nuance in anyone else's situation) is INTERESTING.

And yet, that's never the character we get.

There's no real nuance to Satine. There's never any real discussion of Satine making MISTAKES or being WRONG. When she condemns Obi-Wan and the Jedi, the narrative supports her. When her choice to remain neutral cuts her planet off from all trade, the consequences of it aren't attributed to HER choices but to literally EVERYONE ELSE'S as they struggle to deal with the ramifications without her ever bothering to find a solution to a problem SHE CAUSED. She threatens an innocent man with imprisonment for wanting to save a warehouse full of evidence from being blown up and it's just brushed off as Satine being passionate about her cause instead of a dangerously incompetent and arrogant asshole. And somehow she was strong enough to stand up to a bunch of Mandalorains who had just been at war with each other and force them into being at peace, but when Death Watch shows up with a few criminals she immediately rolls over and surrenders without even bothering to fight back in any way, but this is represented as Satine giving the people what they want instead of Satine just being weak.

Believe me, I WANT to like her. The version of Satine that is implied by her backstory is so interesting, but the version that exists in the present day is one of the worst political leaders we're introduced to in Star Wars. At least most of the other terrible political leaders have the decency to be openly lazy or selfish or evil. Satine is presented as this perfect benevolent intelligent leader and then every action she takes is the stupidest, most arrogant bullshit imaginable that constantly just makes her and her people's lives worse. What is there to enjoy about that?

[gffa]

This week’s Ahsoka episode unfortunately reignited those tiresome “Jedi child soldiers” accusations in the fandom and of course demonizes the Jedi. What are your thoughts?

Honestly, I thought it was fine. I get why a lot of us have had our nerves scraped raw by fandom constantly harassing us and trying to scream us into bad faith arguments on stuff like this, so I'm hardly going to wag my finger at anyone feeling further scraped raw by this, but genuinely didn't bother me because the show never blamed the Jedi for the position they were put in, hell, Anakin even basically defended it. I get it, it's Felony, we're used to often assuming the worst about him and who knows maybe it was meant as an indictment, but it genuinely didn't come across that way to me and, further, Filoni has proven himself to have drifted far enough from Lucas' core narratives on enough subjects that he now has to prove himself every time to me before I take his word of god commentary into consideration, so if he tries to say otherwise, no he didn't goodbye felony. And, yeah, fandom has been demonizing the Jedi with this, but there's nothing some people in the fandom won't use to demonize the Jedi with, so I'm not going to live my life anymore by what bad faith actors have to say, and instead focus on what's in the show. Where, in the show itself, Ahsoka is a child put into a war that the Jedi never wanted for her, but it was literally fight or die. Lucas even says that that's the quandary the Jedi are put into, that it goes against their morals to get into a war, but it was either compromise on that or everyone dies. When Ahsoka asks, "What if I wanna stop fighting?" the answer is, "Then you'll die." I saw that as a straight line from what Lucas said was the point of putting the Jedi into the war, that it's a shitty position for them to be in, it's against their principles, it's what led to their deaths, but it was that or everyone dies. What kind of choice is that? So, that's the context of Ahsoka being 14 here (as well as we have to remember that Star Wars is a story for children and having younger protagonists is to give their audience a character to latch onto, not everything is a "child soldier" just because a young kid is fighting, GENRE TROPES EXISTS OUTSIDE OF THE NARRATIVE), it's not "the Jedi didn't care about their children", it was "the Jedi were desperately trying to save lives and they weren't perfect about it because NOBODY CAN BE PERFECT and we shouldn't try to make people be perfect because that only leads to disaster, but it still hurt to watch". Ultimately, the point of the episode was that Ahsoka chose to keep fighting, chose to keep fighting to live, chose to accept Anakin's words about how death and destruction were part of her, but she was more than that, too. The show specifically says she's more than that through Anakin, Obi-Wan, and Qui-Gon. The show says that she's more than just a soldier through having everything of all those Jedi in her. For me, that's pretty Jedi-positive, to have Ahsoka come to her choice to live by having her Master say, yeah, Vader's part of us, but so are the rest of the Jedi, and that's what allows her to rise above everything she's been struggling with. Ahsoka was a soldier as a child, but her entire culture is part of her, and her entire culture was more than just soldiers, she was a Jedi, she had thousands of years of Jedi putting all of themselves into her, she has their philosophies, their art, their rites, their customs, their words, their history, their compassion, she literally has their thousand-year-old Padawan training droid with her. The whole point is that the Jedi were forced to be soldiers and that hurt like hell, it created a terrible scar that they'll always carry with them and their legacy, but that ultimately the Jedi Order is more than that one war. Anakin and Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon and Dooku and Yoda are more than that. And Ahsoka is more than that, too, because she is all of them and more, just as any Padawan she may take will be all of them and more, too.

And that's so Jedi, that's why teaching is so foundational to who they are (and I love that that's why Ahsoka gets so hurt by Anakin's joke about how teaching isn't all it's cracked up to be, it feels like a dig at her specifically, but it's also part of the theme of how over and over and over we see how much Jedi LOVE teaching as a fundamental of their entire culture), that you pass on what you've learned, that every Jedi who comes after you is everything you can give them and then more.

I love that so much!! And fandom acting in bad faith about it isn't going to take it away from me!! 😂

[utilitycaster]

Hi! Hope you don’t mind me asking but, I’ve seen you comment about a “fjord moon” theory every so often in your tags, and I��m quite curious what’s it about? I don’t think I’ve ever heard about it, is it something more prevalent in twitter spaces?

It started in Reddit spaces but it had a moment within the fandom at large during Campaign 2, especially after a YouTube video surfaced shortly after the campaign had come back from hiatus in August 2020. It hasn't come up lately since Campaign 3's plot pretty thoroughly debunked it, which wasn't necessary for reasons I will cover below.

I talked about how stupid it was at the time, and will do so again but I don't feel like looking back through my archives to find that post, so: the idea was that Fjord was from Ruidus. I call it a theory because its creators called it a theory but it was really just a lot of incoherent yelling that unfortunately happened to fall into the hands of a prolific and popular but talentless video maker and was boosted by a prolific and popular but deeply stupid figure on CR Twitter.

You can read it here but in short he basis was that Fjord was actually a Spelljammer Space Orc (Scro; yes this is just Orcs backwards; Spelljammer is not exactly the most brilliant of concepts) because he was intelligent and walked upright, ignoring that Spelljammer was, at the time, from D&D 2e only which can generously be described as "wicked racist in the depiction of orcs". Not that 5e is not without its foibles, but it had largely 86-ed the worst of the racism that pervaded earlier orc depictions. Also Garthok pre-dated Fjord and was a half-orc with the same intelligence, but what are facts to an idiot. So anyway this guy working off a deeply racist older concept for orcs spun this into a wild conspiracy theory involving the fact that Travis likes Dragonball Z; something about the film Spaceballs (as far as I know Travis has said absolutely nothing about this, this is just that the Mel Brooks Star Wars parody and my personal childhood favorite Spaceballs exists I think?) and various other random pulls from science fiction media. This guy asked a question at a panel and mistook the cast looking at him like he had lost the plot as a sign he was onto something. Somehow, people listened to him.

Here's the thing about theorycraft. It is more important, in writing a theory, that you base it on evidence than that you get it correct. Any dipshit can guess and any lucky dipshit can guess correctly, but if you show that you can't structure an argument for beans, anyone who can structure an argument for beans will rightfully look at you and say "well, they predicted something once, but that's a fucking fluke because they're a fucking joke." Theories should explain something that needs explanation (Fjord having an INT of 14 and the name Fjord and being an orphan does not). They should not solely rest on things the cast likes or things that merely exist in-world and certainly not from Spaceballs and Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, the connection of which to Critical Role in that Reddit post is not explained, ever.

To give some examples of good, mediocre, and bad but at least not nearly that bad theorycraft: the theory that Ashton was a meteor that was around early in C3 is in my mind not very good, but at least it fits within Exandria canon and explained something about Ashton needing explanation at the time. The theory that The Emissary is the source of the stasis bubbles is in my mind a very good one explaining several key mysteries (source of stasis bubbles; why Erathis sent him rather than coming himself). The theory that Bor'Dor was a dog was fucking stupid and made no sense nor did it explain anything that needed explanation (and also wildly misjudged how border collies behave) but did at least not say "also, the TV show Lassie...exists in our reality, and this is evidence" The Fjord Moon Theory is maybe the stupidest and worst CR theory I've seen in my entire life, and it's up there for fandom theories over all. I get that it was August 2020 and I don't begrudge people who were very bored and scared from joking about it while not taking it seriously, but I do begrudge those who did take it seriously because like, come on.

Anyway, I bring it up in tags sometimes because many of the worst C3 takes on Twitter that make it to me via "can you fucking believe this" screenshots in the groupchat are either started or propagated by Former Moon Theory People.

[david-talks-sw]

Hello @David-talks SW,

I was just wondering do you, by any chance, have any quotes from George Lucas talking about The Sith or The Emperor's ultimate goal?

I can't find the exact quote but I think he said that Sidious' goal is to rule the galaxy, allow his apprentice to challenge him when the time is right (be it Vader or Luke had he turned to the Dark Side) and allow his apprentice to strikes him down.

All Sith is after immortality but from their point of view life after death does not exist. The closest thing to immortality is their own legacy. That is why Sidious is trying to find the perfect apprentice in I-III. He find that in Anakin. Vader fails him at the end of III with his fight with Obi-Wan Kenobi. He find another chance with Luke Skywalker and that is he is so obsessed with trying to convert young Skywalker over to his side.

At the end of the day, he doesn't care what happen to him as long as the Sith rule the entire galaxy after him forever.

It is consistent with what he told Yoda before their fight in the Senate in III: "DARTH SlDIOUS: You will not stop me. Darth Vader will become more powerful than either of us."

I believe Dave Filoni said something alone the line of Maul's own goal in Rebel Recon, which was a behind the scene show of Star Wars Rebels (2014-2018). Mind you I think Dave Filoni's understanding of the Sith, in general, is akin to those of George Lucas' vision of them rather then the Jedi.

I could be wrong on the matter and I would be thankful if you could correct me on it.

Thank you.

Hey there!

I see @writerbuddha already answered you here.

Let me just add a few more quotes for your information!

"The Jedi are the enemy of the Sith because the Sith want to dominate the galaxy, to control everything, and for a thousand years they have had a plot against the Jedi." - Sci-fi Online, 2005

The Sith just wanna subdue and control everyone around them, including the Force itself, to fashion the galaxy in their image.

"The end game for the Sith was to bring the world into a very selfish, self-centered, greedy, evil place, as opposed to a compassionate place." - James Cameron's Story of Science Fiction, 2018

I go more into clarifying the Sith's goals here. Here's another quote that isn't in the linked post:

Q: So what is the Phantom Menace? There are lots of different ways to put it. It's the Dark Lords of the Sith, of which there are only two. That's the opposite of a Jedi. It's somebody that works with the dark side of the Force. There is one Sith Lord is who trying to wreak havoc and take over the galaxy, and he is the phantom menace. I think you get the idea. There is somebody pulling the strings for everything. - Premiere, 1999

Hope it helps!

Edit:

To be clear, saying the Sith care about their legacy is giving them wayyyy too much credit. They're selfish assholes. The whole point of having an apprentice is that if they die, at least the lineage goes on.

But they're not planning on dying, they're trying to go against the Fates and do everything in their power to NOT die.

The Jedi are the ones who deal in things like a legacy. You tell the word "legacy" to a Sith and he'll laugh in your face, he doesn't care that his *worst case scenario* is safe and sound and will carry on without him, he wants to be the guy that carries on forever.

And as @unhelpfulfemme points out in the replies, this comes with a "might makes right" mentality.

"If scum like you managed to kill magnificent me, then I deserve to die for being so pathetic and losing to a worm, and you deserve to live for having overcome the badass warrior that I am."

[darklinaforever]

I don't understand people who say that The Acolyte is the worst Star Wars show ever made (especially under the pretext of a pacing problem when no one cried foul for that in Ahsoka or even The Book of Boba Fett, which much more deserves the title of worst show made under Star Wars because the writing is shaky and they also mixed it with the Mandalorian for X reasons...), while it is still one of the rare creations made under Disney which finally deals perfectly with the themes of the story, no offense to those who idealize the Jedi.

On top of that, to say that this is the worst thing to ever happen to Star Wars ? Someone has never seen the special christmas or the films made with stupid kids it seems.

On the contrary, The Acolyte was a breath of fresh air for Star Wars. A positive renewal compared to everything we have been given since Star Wars 8, although certainly The Acolyte was very imperfect, that did not detract from the excellent quality of these themes and the way she treated them.

By canceling this Show, Star Wars is proving right to the fanboys who say that Star Wars is not a place for romance (even though it has existed since the first Star Wars) is not a place for important strong women (even though it's been there since the first Star Wars) and now it's not a place for people of color !

While we are still in a universe where we have aliens with green skin, blue skin, etc, some of whom have their own stories in the extended universe that many would love to see adapted !

But non-white humans in the galaxy far, far away who would be the main protagonists of a Star Wars spin-off, does that scare you ?!

But I'm actually hallucinating !

[ghost-of-tk]

The Acolyte's critiques of the Jedi Order make a lot of sense in the context of cops. Hear me out.

SPOILERS FOR THE ACOLYTE

Sol feared the worst for Osha and Mae. Individually, he clearly had a strong protective streak. And as a Jedi, he had a responsibility to seek out Force-sensitive children under the self-righteous* assumption that only the Jedi could properly raise such children. But that protectiveness, and the inherent fear that a threat existed in the first place, made Sol overreact multiple times; right up to stabbing Mother Aniseya because he did not know what her magic did. Sol's protectiveness and righteousness led to aggression; Torbin's impatience led to recklessness; even Master Indara's attempts to swiftly end the conflict and save Kelnacca unwittingly incapacitated/killed the entire coven.

Even with the best of intentions, emotional attachment impaired judgement. Because the Jedi are not perfect people, and cannot be expected to handle all situations with detachment and perfect level-headedness, despite their role as peacekeepers. Not because the Jedi are wholly evil, but because they are human (psychologically. not all biologically, of course).**

The Jedi team interfered with an unfamiliar community, in excessive numbers***. They invaded without authorization. They used excessive force in response to mistaken threats. Do you see where I am going with this?

And of course, the cover-up. I cannot stress how important the cover-up is. Master Sol completely broke Jedi conduct, but so everyone on the team who became complicit, and so did the Council for concealing the truth. Thus, to save face before the Senate when the truth came out, Master Vernestra decided to cast Sol as the single flawed actor amongst an otherwise-pristine order; the bad apple. Which is exactly the kind of rhetoric used by police departments when police officers use excessive force or outright murder innocent people.

Some might say that a Star Wars show criticizing police is 'too woke' or 'too liberal' or some bullshit, but there's actually some pretty obscure Star Wars media that set a precedent: it's called A New Hope. And The Clone Wars. And Rebels. And Revenge of the Sith.

Star Wars, as a franchise, began with a rebellion against an unjust, tyrannical, galaxy-wide police state. George Lucas even cites the US's role in the Vietnam War as one of his primary inspirations. During the Galactic Empire, stormtroopers patrol backwater worlds and fight wars alike; and during the Clone Wars, so do the Jedi.

The Empire's aesthetic is pretty fucking cool. Lightsabers are badass, I love their design. Imperial March slaps. The Sith and Jedi include some of Star Wars' most epic, and intriguing, characters. But those are all parts of the storytelling, the fantasy. Decrying tyranny and self-righteous control has always been at the heart of Star Wars.

*This is not inherently false, either. The Jedi indeed know far more about supporting Force-sensitive children than Glup Shitto of Dantooine. But in this case, the team knew nothing about this witches coven, their relationship with the Force, or their culture. And Sol assumed the worst.

**And it is a good thing that Jedi are imperfect! It makes for compelling characters! Even down to the original trilogy, Luke's defiance of the Emperor is so compelling because he almost gave in to his anger. Obi-Wan's steadfast morality and dedication make his lies all the more meaningful.

*** This part isn't even conjecture, this is canon. Indara explicitly mentions that having all four Jedi confront the coven could be seen as an act of aggression.

[blackseafoam]

So I am finally watching TCW all the way through (I had seen a lot of the episodes when they came out but never watched them in order and could never appreciate them). Just finished the Umbara episode arc. Am I biased or is that some of the best Star Wars to exist???? Like what??? Not only the plot but everything else? The animation, the setting, the lighting, the sound design, the soundtrack, everything.

I did not see the twist coming at all, since so much of the show’s plots have been fairly straightforward adventures.

Waxer had the twi’lek girl drawn on his helmet wtf Filoni that is so emotionally manipulative but also good job sheesh that made me cry

KRELL. What a great character. The tangle of morality between he, Rex, and Dogma the whole time was beautifully written and SCARY. Scary because it felt so real.

The little details of Kix starting to lose his cool, getting flustered and obviously not handling the stress well. Probably seeing ahead at his worst nightmares coming true.

Pipe dream to watch these episodes in a theater edited together as a movie ugh

[chibi-celesti]

Metafalica anw GRANDEE=LILIA_VANROUGE (The Song of Hope of Lilia Vanrouge)

Summary: In honour of one Fae’s Journey to fulfill his princess’ last wish to save her son, the newborn Prince of Briar Valley.

Heavy Spoilers to Book 07 of Twisted Wonderland. You have been WARNED! And to all the Lilia Lovers out there (yes that includes you, @hanafubukki), this is for you! Hope I did him justice!

Hymmnos Lyrics inspired by this lovely cover of METAFALICA.

~xE rre lasye rYEfrEmU sasye ess Asphaela_urgn/.~

~xA rre lasye fwArn Amerfa_sasye, ag hYAppA za r.w. sasye/.~

~xA harr en herr kAvnLYA v.a. 1 varda rre cie aNuOk zz sarsa/.~

~xA rre arhou sAlLYEeh yYAzLYAtAeh dn vege manac rhaplanca en maoh~

They lost…

Briar Country, once heralded as a Land dominated by the Fae, is now a remnant of what it once was…

Their Princess…slain by the humans who demonized them for their existence. All because of the greed of one egotistical man.

All that was left of her was her son. Still only an egg, but also a star of hope for the people of Briar Valley.

And yet he, too, was taken away from his arms. Not by death, but by those who viewed the broken-hearted war general, who could do nothing but weep for the death of his beloved Meleanor, a failure.

As the days began to pass, the people of Briar Valley hoped and prayed for the young prince to hatch. While nurtured from afar with his grandmother giving him her magic, the prince heard Lilia's vow to one day find a solution that will awaken him.

And so, he traveled the changing world of humans. Looking for the key that would save the egg.

During his journey, he would stumble upon people, asking if anyone knew how to hatch a dragon's egg. But all he got in turn was disdain and hatred by most people who only saw him as a monster.

Even with the malice of human perspective and apathy wanting to make him give up, Lilia persevered and continued his journey.

All for Malleus's sake.

While he may not have made any progress, Lilia could only offer stories to the young prince when he met him time and time again. His voice was a balm to the little one, subconsciously becoming a Hymn of Hope to young Malleus. 

The stories Lilia told were that of an ever changing world beyond Briar Valley's borders. How much humanity has changed; some still superstitious and distrusting while others were more open and compassionate. He spoke of how he hopes to show Malleus the world once he's older.

The days passed with no signs of the egg shell showing any cracks to indicate his hatching. The people of Briar Valley feared that their Prince would soon join his parents in the Stars. That they would lose their symbol of hope to death.

However, even as those around him and Queen Maleficia despaired for the worst, Lilia kept moving forward. Kept going despite the gear gnawing at his heart and mind.

“I made a promise to your mother that you will one day hatch and become a Prince she would be proud of.”

And Lilia's vow grew into determination and hope. A hope that for one day Malleus could forge a bond with the outside world. From that hope gave birth to a power that is befitting for someone him; Protector of Cradles. Such a blessing allowed him to save the young prince when he began to reject his Grandmother’s magic and cry out to his true guardian and father.

Giving it his all, from his love, his magic and life force, Lilia had given it all to Briar Valley’s Hope. To young Malleus.

Lilia Vanrouge was proud to give up everything to give his Prince that hope.