#wtnv fic

[gammija]

[CECIL]: "So, as we move into the final hours of the competition, vote! Whether it's for your favorite, local, Night Vale community radio host or some... pile of bones, don't let your voice go unheard.

Also... Well, this might be a little bit outside the rules, but you could even make a second account to show a little more support for whoever you think should win. You probably won't get caught. As City Council declared in a recent press release, "Voter fraud doesn't exist."

"There is no such thing as voter fraud," City Council said last Wednesday, their many mouths moving as one. "No one can vote more than once. We certainly can't. Ha, ha." Some of their feet shuffled. "We definitely did NOT commit voter fraud by using the recently developed cloning technology to make copies of ourselves, force them to vote for us, then bus them into the Whispering Forest where we threw them out. That. Never. Happened," they added emphatically.

Immediately after the press conference they disbanded the City Council's, 'Night Vale committee for Fair Elections', by eating them."

[A door creaks.]

[CECIL]: "Listeners, someone has just entered my studio.

Uhm, excuse me! You're not allowed to be in here!

It looks like it's a small man, with a smoothly bald head, and dark empty eyes...

Oh no. They're sockets. This must be him, this 'Snas' the skeleton. He's coming to defend his title...

Listeners, as I prepare myself for what will surely be a fight to the death, seeing who takes who out first, I take you... To the weather."

[CECIL]: "Welcome back. I know you're all dying to know whether I won the Tumblr sexyman poll, and if I defeated the small skeleton. Well...

I was all ready to fight, getting into a stance, when the skeleton held up his hands. He said that he didn't want to fight, and that he'd come here to concede and hand me the title.

I'll admit, I was a bit taken aback by this at first. Of course, I had to protest. Wouldn't that be unfair to the few people who voted for him, I asked?

But he explained that, since he already won last year, he wasn't really looking forward to all the attention and hassle from winning a second time. And seeing as it apparently meant a lot to me, he'd rather just let me win than miss his wedding.

Yeah, apparently he's about to be wed to someone named Komaeda in a few days? Good for him.

Dear listeners, after his heartfelt plee, I felt I had no choice but to accept the win.

Which means I am now, officially, Tumblr sexyman of 2023. Yay!

Stay tuned next for muffled sounds of celebration, overheard from a neighbour's house nearby.

Good night, Night Vale. Good night."

[nightvale-radio]

THE BIG ARGUMENT CHAPTER!! super excited for where things go from here

[tefmiles]

scientist meets icky oopy guy

[davepetacreates]

Current Writing Projects:

Keeping Vigil -- Davekat vigilante au with triple identity shenanigans. In progress, updates sporadically.

Appearified -- Bro gets switched with a Dirk from another timeline. Now he has to learn how to function as a human being again. Meanwhile, in the timeline he left behind, a very bewildered Dirk has to fix his reputation and find out what happened to Dave and how to set him back on track. In progress, updates frequently.

Ophelia -- Davekat Humanstuck prom au. What's better to do at prom than take a person you've known for barely an hour to Dairy Queen? In progress, updates rarely. Written for @hopefullyababe .

Welcolme to Night Vale -- A Welcome to Night Vale ripoff I've been making in a Discord server with some friends. Now with overly gratuitous Homestuck references. Updates weekly if everything's going well.

[sweet-sage-tea]

I Dyed Your Lab Coat Purple... (It Looks Better This Way)

(someone once said write what you know. I now will eternally abuse this piece of advice.)

Carlos had seen quite a bit of weird stuff in Night Vale. From a house that doesn't exist, to severe earthquakes that no one can feel, angels, and tiny underground cities (granted, that might not technically be considered Night Vale, but that's not the point,). So, it's reasonable to assume that certain things are just...normal here. That certain things happen that just aren't worth questioning (well, not at the moment, of course. Carlos is a scientist, after all.) But he should at least stop being surprised after a bit of time.

So it was only natural that he'd assume that Cecil's hair is just...like that. A beautiful, ethereal purple that almost looks like it glows. Besides, he hadn't heard Cecil mention anything about his hair requiring much upkeep. Surely, with that wonderful shade it would require some type of color-safe shampoo, or extra precautions as to not stain the shower in his bathroom.

Suffice to say, Carlos was a bit surprised when he walked into Cecil's apartment to see his boyfriend, head stuck unceremoniously under the kitchen faucet, practically waterboarding himself.

And Cecil, not expecting Carlos to be here so early, heard the door open and jumped slightly, hitting his head on the faucet. He winced, turning it off to look up at Carlos, who had to stop himself from chuckling as thin lines of dye ran down the poor radio host's face.

"Hey Cecil." Carlos gave him a curious smile.

"Carlos! You're-" Cecil pauses to cough a bit, "You're early."

"I thought I'd drop by since I got done earlier than I..." Carlos trailed off, "Cecil...what did you to your kitchen?" Cecil quickly grew embarrassed as he realized just how much dye there was spattered about. He wiped a bit of it from his forehead as he spoke.

"I'm dyeing my hair. I- uh I thought I had enough time to get this done and clean up the kitchen. So we could make dinner together." Carlos chuckled fondly as Cecil stuck his head back under the faucet.

"Here, let me help you." Carlos walked over, positioning himself next to Cecil. Just as he does, a splash of dark purple water hits his face. He sputtered, caught off guard by how far the water had traveled, and Cecil turned off the water, rising from the sink to look at Carlos.

"Oh- here, let me get that." Before Carlos could protest, Cecil had swiped off the bit of dye from his face with his thumb. His, obviously dye-covered thumb, that is. He froze, supposedly having seen the large purple streak of dye he left on Carlos' cheek. "I..."

"You made it worse?"

"Yeah...I made it worse." A moment goes by before the two start laughing.

"Just get you head in the sink." Carlos said, shaking his head, "I'll do the rinsing, alright?" Cecil nodded, doing as he was told. He hummed contently as Carlos turned on the tap and ran his fingers through his hair, and Carlos tried very hard to focus on rinsing the dye out (and specifically not getting distracted by listening to the adorable sounds his boyfriend was making.) "You know," Carlos chuckled, "For a bit there, I didn't realize that you actually dyed your hair."

"What- how?" Cecil asked.

"I...sort of just assumed it was another Night Vale thing. Y'know?" It was Cecil's turn to try not to laugh.

"Really?" He must have revealed a bit too much in his tone, as Carlos explained with an air of light-hearted exasperation.

"Well, yeah. I mean, the color was super consistent. It never faded, and I figured it would be hard to get the exact same results every time you dyed your hair. So I just...thought it was always like that."

"Huh. I can see how you thought that." He replied. A bit of pride welled in his chest at the thought of him doing such a perfect job with his hair that Carlos assumed that he couldn't possibly have dyed it, but the pride faded a bit as he remembered that his head was currently stuck directly in his kitchen sink and Carlos was there to witness it. The knowledge flustered him a bit.

The conversation lulled for a while, and eventually the water ran clear. Carlos turned it off and pushed the faucet to the side, letting Cecil stand up again. Carlos grabbed the towel and started to dry off his hair, somehow flustering Cecil that much more.

"Thanks, Carlos." Cecil tried to pass off his breathlessness as something other than the intimacy of the moments before as Carlos handed him the towel. He may have missed the light lavender stain on it, but Cecil most definitely did not miss the bright purple splatters across Carlos' once perfectly white lab coat. Carlos followed his gaze, looking down at himself. "Oh, that's not good..." Carlos shrugs, amused.

"It's alright. They're made to get dirty anyway." He pauses for a moment, "Besides, I kinda like it."

"You do?"

"Yeah. Although, I'm unsure how the dye might react to some of the chemicals I work with..." Cecil spots the subtle glimmer in his eye and nearly swoons, "But I guess that means I'll have to figure that out." He grins.

"I can't wait to hear about it." Cecil smiles.

"Now...about the kitchen..."

[juneofbonesao3]

[zeldainhiding]

pumpkin soup

summary: It's Halloween. It's cold outside. And the Glow Cloud has turned orange.

Go and celebrate it - it's your civic duty.

genre: meet-cute, enemies to lovers, a little angst

wc: 1.1k

pairing: cecilos

read it here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/42772839/chapters/107450949

[cupidsbed]

Do you like au fucs?

What about original characters?

Well do I have the fanfic for you!!

This is Welcome to Night Vale and Magnus Archives cross over with major cannon divergence and original characters! The most important part?

Tim fucking lives!

[koszmarnybudyn]

The kids will some day be fine.

Cw. Blood on the second picture:

[cobalt-knave]

do you think cecil palmer has listened to taz ethersea (whatever taz ethersea looks like in night vale)

follow up: do you think he writes slash fic about the blink sharks somehow

[cowboyinternist]

wtnvs :]

[nightvale-radio]

we're back! the plot only thickens in this one, plus some fun character details. check it out!

[tefmiles]

put that guy in SITUATIONS

[davepetacreates]

Episode 1 (WTCV) - Laika

--start of broadcast--

CECIL: A soul is not always in the places it needs to be in. And sunglasses won’t protect you from the flaming tendrils of the green sun.

Welcome to Nightvale. 

[musical interlude]

CECIL: Well, good morning, listeners! To start off today’s broadcast, I think that we should discuss the newcomers in town. I sent interns Sapphrel and Ruben to go interrog– wait, no, that says interview – the incredibly large group that has taken over the Yellow Crown apartment complex. Yeah. Taken over. It’s a seriously large group. 

Interns Sapphrel and Ruben returned with the news that, in fact, there is no pumpkin, and there never even was one, and what pumpkin, and why are they talking about pumpkins anyway? 

I clarified that I had meant for them to interview the people who moved in, not the former residents. They exchanged looks with each other, said, “Ohhhhhhh,” with eight letters, and went back to the apartment complex. 

Yeah. Interns, am I right? *laughs*

In other news, Khoshekh has finally left the mens’ bathroom here at the radio station! I saw him just earlier chasing a dog around near the dog park. 

A perfunctory reminder to all Night Vale citizens that dogs are not allowed in the dog park. Humans are not allowed in the dog park. You may see hooded figures in the dog park. Do not look at, think about, or interact with the hooded figures in the dog park. 

Josie, out near the old car lot, has said that some new figures have joined the ranks of the Erikas. These new figures, who are definitely not and never will be angels, as angels do not exist, say that they came from the mountains, which also do not exist. Unless you believe that they do. Then they exist. Anyways, these new additions call themselves Nanna, Corbin, Crow, Prince, Carnelian, and Carols. They are, respectively, blue with a tail, flashing orange and green with legs, orange with a tail, green with horns and a tail, flashing pink and purple with legs, and light blue with horns, cat ears, and a tail. One of them appears to have teleportation powers. 

On – oh, hey! The Faceless Old Woman Who Secretly Lives In Your Home has just handed me my phone. On it is a – a video… of the inside of the newcomers’... apartment buildings… Ugh. How is that much soda even healthy for a guy? Oh my god, is that Good Luck Chuck? Oh, well, at least he has Scott Pilgrim. That somewhat makes up for it. Wait – what the fuck? Did that girl just disappear into thin air? Did she steal from the Ralphs? Oh, no – she’s explaining how she left money. Alright, then, that’s fine. Ewww – I don’t want to see this part, skip skip skip skip skip – Oh, there’s Khoshekh! I was wondering where he had gotten off to! Aww, and it looks like the girl with dog ears is petting him! Who knew?

Well, anyway, it does not appear as though these newcomers are threats to our town! What a relief, Night Vale! What a relief. 

Dear Listeners, I have sad news. I just received word from interns Sapphrel and Ruben that interns Col, Void, Cactus, and Lynx are dead. Their bodies have not been found, as they are, apparently, inside the black hole outside the Moonlite All-Nite Diner. Intern Sapphrel tracked Void’s phone, and found it there. Our hearts go out to the families of interns Col, Void, Cactus, and Lynx. We're very sorry for your loss, and wish you the best in life. They died in the line of service, and were good workers who only wanted the best.

And now, the weather.

41. Moonsetter - Homestuck Vol. 9

Oh! It seems the ghost of intern Void has appeared in the studio, listeners! Let's hear what Void has to say.

INTERN VOID:

CECIL: Oh! Well, thank you, Void! 

Look, I know that the City Council has a policy that dead people can't intern here, and, listeners, I follow every rule that they set up, but you're a qualified candidate, right?

So, since you can't legally intern, you could come work here as our diplomat to the world of the dead! What do you say?

There is silence. She does not appear to be saying anything yet, but instead, mulling it over.

I do rather hope she accepts the offer, listeners. It would be a nice gesture to the ghosts, and, anyways, she could bridge people with their families!

If you have a loved one who died, imagine how lovely it would be to hear how they're doing!

Oh! She's speaking!

INTERN VOID: You can't offer me a job and immediately get mad that I'm not saying anything!! Also, I don't know that many ghosts…

CECIL: She looks… sad, for some reason? Or maybe just put-out.

Also, what do you mean, get mad? I was just describing to our listeners what was happening in the studio. I wasn’t mad at you. It makes sense that you wouldn’t know many ghosts, seeing as how you only recently died.

INTERN VOID: There's not many ghosts in space. 

CECIL: Wait, you’re in space?

INTERN VOID: Yeah. There’s a doggo here. It’s a very good doggo. *mild shuffling ensues* who’s a good girl~

CECIL: Huh. So space is real, unlike what Hiram says. Remember that campaign? Honestly. What a load of dragonshit! He based his entire campaign around defunding the space center, saying it was dumb.

What is the dog's name?

INTERN VOID: I’m not sure, as I didn’t pay too much attention in Martian class. But she has a space suit?!

CECIL: Okay...?

Wait! I think I know this dog! Is her name Laika?

INTERN VOID: I think so! She reacts to it, at least! 

She is a very good dog. 

CECIL: Oh! One sec, I'm going to need to call Carlos! He'll be very interested in this!

*phone ringing*

Hey, Carlos! One of my interns at the station died.

CARLOS: Oh. Oh, honey, I'm sorry-

CECIL: No, it's a good thing! She found Laika!

CARLOS: Wait, what?

Repeat that, please?

She found Laika?

She's in space???

I thought you said she died!

CECIL: I did! She's a ghost!

And she found Laika! 

CARLOS: Oh. OH! Oh my god! Hold on, I'll be over in a few.

I love you, bye!

CECIL: Aw, I love you too!

*hangs up phone*

Isn't he just a sweetheart? Honestly.

INTERN VOID: He is very sweet. But, the job thing…?

CECIL: Okay, I'm reconsidering. Maybe you could work with Carlos? He's been studying the position of Night Vale in the galaxy in comparison with the rest of the Earth. He's become very interested in space recently, and you, being a ghost and therefore able to actually go to space, could help with that!

If you want a job, that is.

I just realized how presumptive I'm being! You're in space! You might not even be able to work here on Earth! I am so sorry for how insensitive I've been, please forgive me, Void.

Honestly, my big mouth never stops running.

But the offer still stands if you do want it.

INTERN VOID: Oh, heck yee, I wanna be a space diplomat!

CECIL: Alright. When Carlos comes over, I’ll let him know and he can get you set up! Does that sound good?

INTERN VOID: YEET

CECIL: Perfect. 

Thank you, listeners, for sticking with us through that... brief interruption to normal matters. Now, for the Community Calendar.

Monday is Opposites Day, and is no longer going to be Monday, but Yaednehm. Yadmehn? Yadmon? I think that's right. Huh. The ground will be up, and all the blood will be rushing to our heads as we frantically contemplate what direction is what.

Tuesday will be a day in which you dream of a giant plush squid with narrowed eyes, embroidered onto a young girl's dress as she casts a spell over a well-loved bloodstone circle, trying to figure out how to save her friends and family from destruction. 

Wednesday is canceled.

Thursday is the big homecoming baseball game against Desert Bluffs! Desert Bluffs. Honestly, they're as likable as Steve Carlsberg! And that is not saying much of anything at all, listeners. Not much at all. Go get 'em, Scorpions.

Friday is origami day at the community center! Bring your kids for a day of fun! There will be activities held. Some of the activities will be closed off. Some will be imaginary. Some will be deadly. It's all part of the fun! And John Peters - you know, the farmer? - will be selling his imaginary corn snow cones there as well! I love those things. They're so nostalgic, you know? 

Saturday is the Concert of the Erikas. Come by Old Woman Josie's house out near the car lot to hear the definitely NOT angelic choir.

Sunday is also canceled.

I, for one, am excited for this week! We're going to have so much free time, what with two days canceled! What fun! Me and Carlos are going to take Estaban to go investigate some science-y things! He is such a cutie in a lab coat! Both of them are!

Next, dear listeners, we go to Traffic.

A young man stands in his bedroom. It just so happens that today is NOT this young man's birthday. The smell of cake permeates the air. This family is constantly on the run from the Secret Police for violating the ban on wheat and its byproducts. The dulcet tones of the radio host's voice lull the boy into a sense of complacency. Learned complacency, one could say. He's learned to take these kinds of peaceful moments when he can, as the times when he cannot are many.

A notification sounds from his computer. His friend with the purple text tells him that something is apparently going to happen on Tuesday that she's going to have to prevent. He tells TT to fuck off, and returns to gazing at the clouds. The red-flag-doohickey-thingy on the mailbox is down. It has been down. It will likely always be down, unless it's up. 

Further down the street, a teenager in a black sweatshirt stands wearily. They shield their eyes from the sun, staggering as they walk towards the young man's home. A mail truck pulls up to the home. They startle. The mail truck leaves the home. They run. As the young man perks up, they open the mailbox, steal the mail inside, and run away. The young man opens his front door and gives chase.

The timeline has been locked, listeners, and I can view it no longer. 

This has been traffic.

Listeners, we all have those moments when something is just so inevitable, so unchangeable, that we don't notice it? Well, today, I noticed it. I don't know what I noticed, but it was something, and I noticed the heck out of it. It was a young man in a red shirt, scars lacing down his neck, and I noticed. You are not alone. No one is alone. Loneliness is a concept. It is a state of emotion. One can be lonely, but one is never alone. Everyone is noticed. And when you are noticed, you are noticed. So please, take care, dear Listeners, and make sure to buy your privacy every month from the Secret Police. Remember, twenty a month keeps them out of your stuff.

A quick word from our sponsors:

Everyone turns into a spider eventually. Everyone goes through that awkward phase where they want to turn into a spider. And everyone goes through that phase where their spiders want to turn into them. But, for every stage of life, there's a certain black hole that wants to eat the spider inside your heart. If it's outside your heart as well, that's just a bonus. You will still be eaten. You just won't come back from it.

Walmart. Save money. Live better.

Our show is drawing to a close, dear listeners, but before we go, I have a daily prophecy to give! Let's see...

* slight plastic crinkling noises *

* sound of a bag opening * 

* eating sounds ensue * 

* a slip of paper scraping against something stale or burnt * 

Yjod pmr od gpt yszols gaumm. S nppl od mpyjomh eoyjpiy oyd qshrd. Trsvj omyp yjr dlu smf htsn pmr. Upi eoaa nr rcytrzrau fodsqqpomyrf eoyj ejsy upi gomf. Oy eoaa arsf upi yp trnra. Upi eoaa nr gohjyomh gpt upit aogr, s lmohjy om omlu stzpt. Fpm'y dsu er fofm'y estm upi.

* long silence *

W... What just happened? What was the prophecy? My God, dear Listeners, I don't think I know what I said! And I always know what I said. Do you think I was possessed? Hmm...

Anyway, as creepy as that was, everything must end, and this show is no different. I wish you all an amazing week. Stay tuned for the sounds of me curling up into a fetal position and having an existential crisis over what my brain does when it's on autopilot. It's terrifying to think it, but... It could hurt them. I could hurt them.

Fuck. 

Well, on that note, I leave you. Good night, Night Vale. Good night.

--end of broadcast (dated 2/6/23)--

[nonbinary-catboy]

Thinking abt Cecil and Abby living together after their mom left in the same house they grew up in. Thinking abt there being an extra chair at the dining table that none of them ever sit in but that they never bother to move. Thinking abt there being an extra bedroom in the house collecting dust that neither of them ever go into. Thinking abt there being obvious echoes of a third person who lived there that they don't move in the hope that she might come back some day. Thinking abt a similar thing happening in Cecil's apartment when Carlos was in the desert otherworld.

[bulkhummus]

thinks about simone rigedau sponsoring carlos during his initial sabbatical, with his attempt to "figure out just what exactly is going on around here"