#yes he's from naruto hush

[ask-yoriichi]

(Mun: I feel like making another rp acc and it's this man)

(Mun: This will definitely slow my time to reply some asks unless if I want to make it just writing, but then again, I'd love to doodle him and practice drawing him bc omg I definitely need some improvement on him. What do you think?)

[eddiemunson-reader-shame]

Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader: Space Oddity, Part 1

In my ongoing quest to write more self indulgent reader inserts, I present to you: Weird Reader.

Sorry guys, but in school I played with the girls who pretended to be Warrior Cats, and ate lunch with guys who unironically did the Naruto run. The only thing separating me from this reader in this story is the fact that I mask in public and unmask at home.

***

“You want me to play D&D with you guys?”

You watched with suspicious eyes as Mike Wheeler and Dustin Henderson nodded frantically, stirring the sweet, syrupy dessert of fruit cocktail in your lunch tray compartment. Staring at you was like staring at a taxidermy raccoon: you were dead eyed, but still positioned as though you could jump out and give someone rabies.

If he had been asked at gunpoint, Mike would have admitted that you were a last resort choice.

“Yeah…” Mike said cautiously, trying not to stare directly into your eyes.

Dustin smiled, leaning forward.

“You like D&D, right?” He tried, hopeful.

Everyone they had asked in Hawkins High had so far said no to subbing in for Lucas Sinclair, and Mike had balked at the idea of even thinking of asking you when they got rejected for the fifth time. You were even worse than the freaks of Hawkins High. The collective student body had come together as one to declare that you were a weird, mean bitch.

“I like what I’ve heard of it…” you mumbled, “I never played it before…”

Dustin’s face lit up like a Christmas tree.

“Really?” He asked, his geometric pattern button up nearly dipping into his open can of chocolate pudding, “Never ever? So you’d need to be taught?”

Before you could venture an answer, Mike pulled him back.

“Could you-… Could you just excuse us please? Thank you.”

You nodded slowly while Mike dragged Dustin away to a corner of the bustling lunchroom. While they conversed in hushed whispers, you sat there alone, the students sharing your space giving you a wide berth at the head of the lunch table.

“Are you out of your fucking mind?!” Mike hissed at Dustin, “You’re going to ask The Bitch to play, and she’s never even played D&D before?!”

Mike knew the stories. Robin had once asked to borrow a pencil from your jubilee of pens you kept in the pocket of your shortalls. Reluctantly you agreed, and then you had a meltdown when she took the flat contractor’s pencil with the He-Man sticker on it. Steve had told any of The Party who would listen about his encounter: even Eleven could perfectly recite the story about the weird girl who had flat tired Steve in the hall every day at 9am when he walked by Mrs. Click’s class, ruining the backs of his brown suede moccasins so often that his mom stopped replacing them after a while. His description of the perp matched you exactly.

Even Mike on his first day of school had been subject to your oddities. A casual lunchtime stroll found him tripping over a trap, made of plastic milk crates and dead branches you’d constructed by the football field. The encounter ended with him being subjected to your twenty minute screaming lecture on why it was rude of him to wreck the “houses” you’d made for the skinks that darted around the concrete walkways.

Mike Wheeler hated you because of reputation, but Dustin knew better than to fall victim to heresy. He had seen the drawings of dragons, daleks, dinosaurs, wolves and mermaids on xerox paper you had left behind once in the lunchroom. When he found you to give them back (you didn’t say thank you), he’d been gifted with a drawing a day later in his locker: a very detailed Spock giving the Vulcan salute, “Live Long and Prosper” written underneath in bubble letters above your loopy cursive signature. He still kept it taped to his Geometry folder.

“Dude, yes! Chill out!” Dustin hissed back, looking at you fondly from a distance, “You remember what Eddie said? ‘Find the little lost sheepies that need us’. Look at her, man. Doesn’t that scream little lost sheep to you?”

They turned to look at you simultaneously. After looking both ways to check the coast was clear, you commandeered Dustin’s abandoned chocolate pudding. Spooning the syrupy peaches, pears, pineapple, and single half of maraschino cherry of your fruit cocktail inside, you mixed the chocolate and fruit together. Lathing up the leftover pudding with your tongue, the spoon was licked clean before you tossed it vaguely into an indignant girl’s creamed corn, but she was too afraid to yell at you while you were armed with chocolate.

With great relish you began eating your concoction with your fingers.

Mike grimaced while Dustin just laughed.

“She’s perfect.” Dustin gushed, “And you should see her drawings, they’re badass!”

“Just because she’s a gross weirdo who’s good at drawing doesn’t mean she knows jackshit about tabletop games!” Mike growled, nearly gagging when he saw you mop up the leftover pudding in the can with your bread roll, “You bring a beginner into Hellfire Club, Eddie’s gonna blow a goddamn gasket! He’s already on the warpath because of Lucas’ championship game tonight, can you imagine what he’ll do when we bring in The Bitch?!”

“Mike, relax. Eddie’s not going to know she’s a novice. Everyone still flips through the handbook, they won’t notice if she does it. We’ll give her a crash course, I’ll even let her borrow my Player’s Handbook so she can come in looking like she at least knows the basics. And if Eddie does get pissed we can just… ease him into the idea that a succulent babe wants to play with him.”

Dustin made the shape of a curved figure with his hands, while Mike looked ready to punch him in the groin.

“You think he’s going to fold for a fat girl?” Mike snarled.

“… Shut up Mike,” Dustin said, immediately protective of you, “He’s going to fold for a cute girl. Look at her! Soft arms, round face, thick thighs… Eddie’s gonna lose his goddamn mind, man! That’s like his ideal type.”

They continued to argue back and forth, finally coming to a grudging resolution when Dustin dragged Mike back by the shirt to your lunch table.

“If this goes to shit, I know where you live.” Mike hissed quietly.

“Shhhh!” Dustin slapped Mike’s arm before looking back at you with a dopey grin.

You were staring down both of them, eyes flicking from Dustin to Mike. The empty pudding cup can was sitting exactly where it had been once full before, but the pop top was gone, and you were pretending like you hadn’t just gone to town on an unholy concoction.

“I made a decision.” You said suddenly.

The two freshmen looked at one another, before leaning in closer. Mike looked skeptical, but Dustin’s grin was nearly splitting his face in half.

“I’ll play with you guys.” You said after a few seconds.

Dustin couldn’t help but fist pump into the air, nearly tipping over backwards on his chair while Mike just grimaced like he was about to puke. An imperfect smile with chocolate teeth flashed at the boys, and you were just about to speak when Mike stopped the party.

“Okay, listen… if you’re going to play, you’re going to have to put in the work, it’s not like playing Monopoly.” He said, staring you down, “This is serious shit.”

You closed your mouth, head tilting to the side.

“Oh… I thought it was like, making your own characters and pretending to be them and stuff.” You said.

“It is, but it’s a lot more nuanced than that. Our Advanced D&D campaigns are different. We play very combat heavy sessions, we use actual strategy in battle. It’s not a goddamn tea party.”

“And Eddie takes the rules very seriously…” Dustin chimed in, “So we’ll have to familiarize you with the basics.”

“Eddie!?”

Both boys jumped back as you banged your hands on the table, getting up close and nearly crawling on top over to them. The students sitting next to you collectively jumped, the metal legs of their chairs scraping and making a horrid screech against the linoleum flooring.

“You mean… you’re talking about Eddie The Freak, right?” You hissed under your breath.

“Eddie Munson.” Dustin corrected, frowning when you called him a freak, “He’s the dungeon master of our club… of Hellfire Club.”

Your eyes widened, and your chest began to rise and fall rapidly.

“You’re right though. That is the very same freak.” Mike cut in, lowering his pitch hoping that feeding into the negativity would scare you away, “He’s a dick to newcomers. You might get the boot if he finds out we brought you in without having any background knowledge of D&D.”

His words made you shrink back, looking at your lunch tray and the little mess of chocolate you’d unknowingly splattered on your clothes. Dustin could have killed Mike, while the latter just looked smug.

And then… you began to giggle.

“Okay…” you smiled.

“Okay?!” Mike and Dustin repeated.

Mike managed to speak up while Dustin was still picking his smiling jaw up off the floor.

“You’re sure you still want to play?” Mike asked, panicking as he pulled out all the stops to get you to quit, “Eddie is not a patient guy with new players, he’s going to rip you to pieces and sacrifice you to the devil!”

You nodded quickly, breathlessly hyperventilating.

“Yeah…! I… If Eddie Munson is running the game… I really wanna play.”

Dustin gave a high pitched giggle of his own and shook Mike’s shoulder, absolutely loving the way your face broke out into a goofy grin. You didn’t even flinch at Mike’s attempts to scare you.

“You got a thing for him or something?” Mike ventured cautiously.

“Yes.”

You answered so unabashedly, with no hesitation, that for a minute it actually endeared you to Mike. Who knew that The Bitch of Hawkins High was actually a human being with wants and needs?

“Wait… are you serious?” Mike asked.

“Uh huh…”

You giggled, biting your lower lip and covering your burning face.

“I think… I think he’s really hot…”

If they had been drinking Tab, they would have spit the liquid out all over you.

“You think Eddie’s hot?” Dustin wheezed.

“Yeah… um… I’ve had this like monster crush on Eddie since I was in fifth grade. He did like this talent show and played the guitar real good, and he’s all loud and funny and crazy and I think he’s got a real charming smile…”

The cadence in your already deep contralto was lilting into a mezzo soprano the more you talked about their sadistic dungeon master, and you were rocking side to side in your plastic chair while Dustin and Mike just watched you make a complete ass of yourself.

This probably would have turned into two hours of blabbing, had not Mike refocused you and Dustin and begun to actually lay out the basics of TSR’s Advanced Dungeons and Dragons. No time to lose, back to business. If you were going to play with Eddie you had a lot of catching up to do. They had a spare set of dice, and Mike helped you roll for stats as Dustin began to write out a crude character sheet for you based on your imaginative ideas.

“We can probably make you a character very quickly.” Mike said, flipping through his own Mead Composition notebook as he checked past characters that had died valiantly in battle, “I have one you can use. Barbarians are stupid easy for first timers since you’re just hitting shit with a sword-...”

“I want a character based on my story I’m writing!” You exclaimed, and then you subjected Mike to your brief (lie) synopsis of one of many witchy characters who was cursed by a dark goddess.

It took a lot of adjusting and words that held no meaning to you, like “Domain of Trickery” and “Cleric of Shar”. The two freshmen helped you settle on a character that would be deemed useful for Hellfire’s campaign, and made sure to force feed you every rule and spell that Gygax and Arneson had conceived for your chosen class. True to his word, Dustin let you borrow the Player’s Handbook he carried with him at all times when the bell to conclude lunch rang out. You took it with promises that you’d give it back when you met them outside of the drama room later after school, already burying your nose in the pages when you walked off to your class.

The boys saw a different side of you that possibly no one else in the school ever had: a familiar side, a human side. A side that was brutally honest and sometimes a little mean, but just as vulnerable and relatable as anyone else. A consensus had been reached during their shared English class: you were definitely weird, but actually pretty smart and imaginative. Possibilities of keeping you on as a permanent member were being discussed when Dustin and Mike found you hiding behind the lockers just outside the drama room around three pm.

“What are you doing?” Mike asked.

You shook your head, clutching your fat trapper keeper to your chest and handing Dustin back his Player’s Handbook.

“Eddie’s in there…” you muttered, chewing on the spine of your trapper keeper covered in duct tape

“Yeah, he usually gets there with Jeff, Gareth and Frank really early, to set up the map and the dice towers.” Mike nodded.

From the rectangular slat of a window, one could see Gareth and Frank meticulously setting up Jenga pieces and miniatures on top of a slab of butcher paper marked in sharpie, janky cindrilical tubes painted to look like castle towers were set up at each place at the table (the dice towers, fashioned from Pringles cans, cardboard, glue and paint). Eddie and Jeff were deep in conversation, plugging in lamps and electric candelabras left over from the drama club’s last production of ‘Pride and Prejudice’. Inside the mood was almost holy, reverent (or like Eddie liked to call it: a softcore porn on Valentine’s day mood), and the boys couldn’t help the eagerness as they went to the door.

You, however, stayed firmly planted behind the lockers.

“What are you doing?!” Mike hissed, “Come on! We’re gonna be late because of you!”

“I don’t wanna go in…!” You snapped back, suddenly shy.

Mike looked at Dustin, ready to destroy him, while Dustin tried to talk you down.

“Hey, hey! Come on, it’s okay. Don’t worry! You have a good character, and if you need help you can just sit with me and Mike-…”

“But what if he doesn’t like me?” You protested.

“I swear to you on my mother that Eddie is going to love you.” Dustin said, trying to calm you down, “You’re great. You actually came with a character to play, and he’s going to be so happy that a girl is showing interest in his hobbies.”

You were about to turn tail and leave when you felt an iron grip around the meat of your bicep, pulling you forward with an unnatural strength born entirely of Nerd Rage.

“Oh hell no!” Mike said, pulling you kicking and protesting towards the door, “You’re not doing this to me right now god dammit! You’re going to get your ass in there, and you’re going to play! I didn’t sit through lunch listening to your weird edgy character backstory just so you could pussy out at the last minute! Now get your ass. In. NOW!”

With a harsh shove, you flew into the drama room – tripping on your own two feet trying to catch yourself – and spilling the contents of your trapper keeper all over the ground. Strong hands caught you before you face planted into the floor, holding you steady.

“Easy, easy!” Called out a familiar voice, “Goddamn... What the hell was that for, Mike?! You could’ve broken her nos-…”

Eddie Munson’s voice trailed off, and the boys watched as their fearless leader, their metalhead bard, began to stare open mouthed slack jawed at you.

“You told us to find a lost sheep.” Mike snarled, “So here she is.”

[you-can-call-me-fangs]

Hokage Naruto x Male Reader

a/n: making a quick fic for the ass end of Kinktober, I thought it be fitting to use a classic character and a classic kink, yeah I don't know why but Hokage Naruto got me acting up contains: some good ol' fashion cockwarming

Naruto was where he could usually be found; in his office doing paperwork, piles and piles of paperwork. Normally Naruto would be a little exhausted at this point, tired from several hours of constant writing for this and signing off on that, but today felt a little different.

As Naruto moved foward to place another finished paper in his done pile he stopped just short, his fingers twitching to grip the paper in his hand and his face ingniting in a red hue.

"Aww what's the matter Lord Hokage, feelin' distracted?" You said from behind the seventh, wrapping your arms around his waist and placing your head on his shoulder.

The reason Naruto was feeling so awake today was because his boyfriend currently had his cock lodged inside him. For the past few weeks Naruto had been acting especially sluggish as if work was becoming even more strenuous than normal, so to help Naruto stay up and alert while working you came up with a plan. Have the seventh hokage sit on your dick while he worked. It really was a full proof plan, I mean, who could possibly be unattentive and tired when you were straddling a cock that was constantly touching your prostate and even the slightest movement made you feel aroused? The answer was nobody, not even the hokage himself apparently.

You started kissing the hokage's neck being careful not to leave any obvious marks-- Naruto claimed it wasn't a good image to have as an upholding leader-- only lingering just long enough for Naruto to gently lean into you, tilting his head so you could have better access. You continued, leaving a trail of kisses from the side of Naruto's neck to the back, lightly biting down right in the center. Naruto, completely unprepared, gasped along with a jolt of his body making him remember the dick still inside him. Naruto instinctively reached for the arms of his chair gripping them for dear life while a particularly loud groan left his mouth, he was starting to feel a little sensitive after several continuous hours of you being inside him.

"Wow, you've really done a lot of work today, Lord Seventh, I think it's about time you took a break," you said in a hushed voice muffled slightly by your lips still grazing the back of Naruto's neck, with each word the hokage couldn't help but shiver. "I think it's about time you took a break." As the words were leaving your mouth, your hand had made it's way down to Naruto's crotch quickly feeling the protruding bulge and grabbing a hold of it, it twitched from your touch, you could also feel a large wet spot where his precum had leaked through his pants. Naruto's only response was another loud moan, he was becoming less and less able to hold back his desire for you, he needed you, now.

Naruto's want was something that he didn't even have to use words to communicate to you, you could already tell how desperate he was for you to actually start moving, thrusting your hips into him as hard as you could, not caring who heard either of you fucking right there in the hokage office. You smirked at the thought.

Naruto let out one more pathetic, half concealed moan, "I guess that's a yes," you said before picking you and Naruto up out of the chair and placing him on top of his desk.

You admired the view of Naruto lazily pulling his pants down the rest of the way, freeing his cock, while you moved your hand up his back taking his shirt with you exposing more and more of the athletically built body underneath. You breathed out an airy laugh, looking at the plump ass of the adorable man below you, swaying back and forth from the effort of fully taking off his pants. Grabbing a handful of Naruto's ass you tested pushing your hips even closer, forcing every last bit of your cock inside. You just didn't want to pull out it was far too warm and snug inside Naruto, he fitted you like a glove, like he was made for you and you alone. Naruto began whimpering with each attempt you made at getting deeper inside of him, forcefully pressing against his prostate each time causing him to clench down on you even harder. You joined in with Naruto's little noises, moaning out, getting louder each time he got tighter.

As fun as it was to simply be inside Naruto, to really help him truly make the most of this break from work, you had to start fucking him properly and show him how much of a good stress relieving boyfriend you could be.

Better yet, you could see how much of a moaning mess you could turn the hokage into.

[cebwrites]

fuck it we ball. woe team shisui be upon ye

returning to this old flame is. wild.

tae and shisui were put on a genin team with someone else from the academy, but they quit a few months in (times of war were tough on a kid) and rio was assigned to them instead; the first two are around the same age, rio's a couple years older

i'll have a proper design for rio eventually, this is more or less just a placeholder for me to see if i could still draw in the naruto style - rio is also their team's medic

if rewatching this show has taught me anything it's that small children can be SO nasty for no discernable reason

tae had a lot of pressure on his shoulders to live up to his old man's name, people telling him from birth that he was gifted or spoiled or never did enough so eventually he just stopped putting in the effort until his team gave him the confidence to try again - for himself rather than anyone else

tae was a gloomy little ghost in the academy; he'd keep to himself a lot, freaking out some of his peers with eyes a little too wide and an unwillingness to be vocal unless it suited him, a complete contrast to his cheerful "normal" twin brother

even though it's widespread and pretty vital, there was, and to some degree is, a stigma that healing jutsu are reserved for mostly women, partially because tsunade was a big proponent for getting medics put on four man teams as a necessity (even though dan was right there with her), so growing up rio caught a lot of flak for it even though it wasn't a particularly new practice by then

the exclusion shisui faced was a lot more subtle and had less to do with his demeanor or personal choices, rather the fact of who he was to begin with - no matter how kind or cheerful shisui was, there'd always be a trail of hushed whispers talking about how he was so pleasant despite being an uchiha, or maybe rumors that he was some meanspirited asshole all along

some folks kept up the niceties, others didn't hide their wariness, but was was clear from the start was this undercurrent of distrust between konoha and uchiha clan that went both ways

tae never bothered with rumors (unless it was to pick a fight with whoever was spreading them about his friend) and rio was a refugee taken from outside the village unaware and indifferent to their politics - uchiha were usually assigned to teams of other uchiha upon request, but shisui could really feel at home with these two after they all got over the initial awkwardness of having to trust someone new

their sensei (not pictured) was a huge factor in these kids getting along at first, he seemed to genuinely love them up until the mission where he was found guilty of treason - a small part of them still wants to believe he actually cared for them (he did, he really really did) but at the end of the day their teacher's hatred for konoha was more important

they were given a replacement leader after that, a man who was less put together but tried hard to teach and nurture all the same

they had a solid handful of years together before the coup, after that everything sort of fell apart - shisui was gone, danzo had tae "interrogated" for potential associations with the uchiha which shut him down emotionally, and after a mission gone awry that resulted in rio getting held captive by enemy nin for a week and heavily tortured, they went on an indefinite hiatus from shinobi duty

[kiljoius-writes]

Favorite Poison

Ao3 | FFN

Full YOTP Series Found Here

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter First Chapter | Master Post

Chapter 2/4: Sweeter Than Candy

“What?”

Hanabi was already stomping away with something disgusting bubbling in her chest.

What the fuck did you just do.

With her byakugan activated, she keeps an eye on Konohamaru as she gets ahead of the group for the rest of the travel.

The first kiss was strategy. It was, really. Sure, it was fun to catch Konohamaru off guard and it did quench a certain curiosity she had had for a while now, but that’s all it was. Strategy. Then he kissed her and that wasn’t strategy at all. Not on her part, or his, because he hadn’t tried to attack after. He was just as confused as she was, though she let anger shine through over the confusion.

He's a good kisser.

When did he become a good kisser?

Who the hell was he kissing?

Why do you care?

“Shit,” she huffs under her breath, hopping into a nearby tree to sit for a moment. She glares at her scratched-up hands. Then she pulls one up to her lip, feeling its plumpness from how hard he had bit it.

Hinata inquired about it when they caught back up.

“Ouch, dear sister.”

Naruto laughed, pointed at it.

“Damn, Konohamaru! Old man Third never tell you not to hit ladies, at least not in the face?!”

Hanabi wasn’t sure if either of them caught the immediate blush that had overtaken both of their faces.

Once she hears Boruto and Himawari’s voices in the distance, she drops back down.

“I can see chakra networks popping up, we’re close,” Hanabi comments loftily as she comes up to her sister's side.

“FINALLY!” Himawari yelps, skipping forward.

Nearly an hour later, and they were coming up on the Great Naruto Bridge, which Naruto, of course, had to stop them at.

“And this, kids! This is my bridge!” Naruto declares proudly, gesturing at it. Hanabi looks down and lets a snicker slip at Boruto’s bored expression and Himawari’s curious one.

“Looks like they’re not impressed.” Hanabi smirks, folding her arms. Naruto scoffs, crouching down in front of his kids.

“Hey, c’mon! A little more fanfare for your dad would be nice, y’know!” Naruto chides, grabbing Himawari’s shoulders. “It’s cool, isn’t it, Hima?!”

“Uhm—yes?” Himawari questions and Hanabi laughs.

“It’s just a bridge!” Hanabi throws her hands up towards it. “A bridge, Naruto!”

“The Great Naruto Bridge,” Konohamaru cuts in, lowering his eyes at her. Naruto nods enthusiastically. “I don’t see any Great Hanabi Bridges.”

“Exactly!” Naruto hops to his feet, swinging his arm around Hanabi’s neck as he guides her towards it. “Look Hanabi, jealousy is a normal emotion, but it’s ugly.” Hanabi grimaces, pulling away from him while Konohamaru laughs from behind. “Once you have a Great Bridge named after you, come talk to me.”

“Why did you fall in love with this idiot, elder sister?” Hanabi hushes a whisper as she comes up beside her sister. Hinata smiles.

“Because of the Bridge!” Naruto shouts after her with his hands cupped around his mouth.

“Don’t worry, sister.” Hinata pats her forearm. “I’m sure someone will name a bridge after you, too.”

Hanabi groans exaggeratedly as she hears Konohamaru howling behind her.

Finally, they were checking into their little coastal hotel, and Hanabi can smell the ocean. It helps clear her mind and push down these weird thoughts invading it.

“Here you two go.” Hinata drops a key into Hanabi’s hand, then another into Konohamaru’s. “You two are in 310.”

Hanabi’s jaw drops. “Wait-what—”

“Ah, yeah, sorry—” Naruto grins sheepishly, setting his arm around Hinata’s shoulders. “I dropped the ball, blame me! I was supposed to book it and forgot about it until last week, by the time I called, they only had one room left!”

“Wait, are we all staying in the same room?” Konohamaru interjects, clutching the key.

“Of course not!” Naruto snorts. “Told ‘em it was the Hero of the War booking and they suddenly found another room for us. All part of that magical charm, right?” He wiggles his eyebrows down at Hinata, who smiles and nods. “Right! Don’t you two worry, there’s a room for you!”

Hanabi grits her teeth. “I’ll stay in your room with you guys.”

“No—no!” Naruto cuts in, shaking his head. Hinata giggles next to him. “Give a family their privacy, Hanabi!”

“I’d rather sleep in the sand,” Konohamaru deadpans and Hanabi nods agreement.

“Do what you want.” Naruto waves them away. “Just leave my kids out of it. Look at Boruto.”

Boruto groans, holding his stomach.

“That was Konohamaru’s fau—”

“Anyway!” Naruto claps his hands. “Let’s get settled in.”

Hanabi and Konohamaru stand awkwardly next to one another for a moment before Hanabi sighs.

“I’m going to the beach.” Hanabi shoves her pack into Konohamaru’s chest, purposefully near the chakra point she had closed, causing him to groan.

“I’m not your pack mule, Hanabi—”

“See you later!”

If Hanabi was confused by what happened earlier, she never let him know it.

But Konohamaru is confused.

He's downright distraught.

Because the churning in his gut hasn't ceased once for the rest of their journey.

He was just glad Hanabi was keeping ahead of them, because every time they came face to face again, his eyes immediately went to that lip. That lip he had bitten to the point it apparently looked like he had clocked her.

His stupid, ridiculous brain was telling him to bite it again.

His idiotic, horrible brain was envisioning Hanabi in a bikini.

His filthy, hormonal brain was forcing an image of a naked Hanabi underneath him, pushing her hips up into his again.

And suddenly, he finds himself unlocking the door to their room and throwing her bag on the floor.

Then, he's changing into a pair of swim shorts, and his feet are carrying him to the beach she had just said she was going to.

Finally, he's greeted with a sight that he couldn’t help but admit was downright magnificent.

Hanabi Hyūga sprawled out on a towel, on her stomach, with her eyes closed.

In a bikini.

And now he knows that the churning in his gut could be nothing else but need. That punch of lust gripping him by the throat and dragging him straight to her.

He stops short.

What am I doing?

He sees her open one eye to glare at him, then her head nudges to the side. “Get my back, Sarutobi.”

He swallows, looking down at the sunscreen she was referring to, then back up at her. “Seriously?”

“Seriously, dummy,” she sighs, reaching out to grab it, then promptly throwing it at his chest. He reflexively catches it, then stares at it. She rests her head on her forearms, face turned away from him. “You see how pale I am! Don’t be shy.”

With a tightness in his chest, he lowers to his knees next to her and decides she couldn’t fluster him like this. Swiftly, he uncaps the lotion and promptly squeezes a huge glob directly on her back, snickering as she gasps.

“Dick!” she growls, burying her face in her arms and he can swear he sees the start of a blush on her cheeks.

“You asked,” he teases, reaching out to begin rubbing the lotion in and—wow. Her skin is way softer than he imagined. For someone so powerful, he expected her to be more…he didn’t know. Muscular? But her body is plush under his fingertips, and he may have been pressing too hard as she wiggles under his touch. “Wait—” he chuckles, pressing into her waist as she recoils. “Are you ticklish?”

“You wish!” she snaps, scooting away slightly. He grins as he draws a circle into the bend of her waist and feels her tensing, abdomen clenching underneath her. “Just put the sunscreen on, perv!”

“Yeah, okay.” He licks his top teeth as he relents, resuming spreading the rest of the lotion. “I’ll just have to keep that one tucked away for later, then.”

“Whatever,” she grumbles and he actually finds it kind of…cute.

Once her back is covered, she rolls over to glare at him and he tilts his head at her, eyebrow raised. “What?”

“You enjoyed that too much.”

“I’m just a man, Hanabi.”

“A stupid one,” she huffs, snatching the sunscreen from his hands. He watches her turn it and squeeze a generous amount into her hand, then yelps when she smacks the hand right into his chest.

“Damn!” he hisses, falling back on his behind as she crawls towards him. He doesn’t have much time to process it as she gets right into his lap, legs stacked on either side of him, and she begins massaging the lotion into his chest. “What—what are—”

“Returning the favor,” she replies, simply, running her hands over his shoulders.

“I can get my own chest, Hanabi—”

“What—” she starts, squinting at him, the lip he bruised pouting out, “—don’t you want me to?”

He grits his teeth and swallowed hard as his eyes land on that lip. Reluctantly, he nods, and his eyes grow a centimeter as her lips split into a beaming smile.

When had her smile looked like anything other than sinister to Konohamaru?

It's…pretty. Pretty in that shiny way, as if her pearly teeth were sparkling. And that churn in his gut becomes harsher.

Disappointment grips him as she moves off his lap and crawls around to his back, and then the cool touch of lotion on her hands makes contact there, too.

He wills his breathing to slow as her fingers massage into his shoulder blades and he wonders if she's being purposeful with her movements. It's just sunscreen, it doesn’t require a full-blown massage. Then he hisses in pain as she drags her fingernails from his neck down his spine.

“Aw,” she whispers, too close to his ear, “don’t like that?”

The shameful thing, he thinks, is that he does.

“Come on.” He looks up as she climbs to her feet and grabs his wrist, pulling him up with her. “Get in the water with me.”

Hanabi Hyūga, covered in the salt water of the ocean, dripping from her chin, down her neck, right into her cleavage.

“Gods help me…” he whispers as he watches her emerge from the water, swinging her hair back.

“Come here!” She waves her hands towards herself and his jaw flexes, hand reaching up to his hair.

“Uh—” he grunts dumbly, shaking his head, “I don’t really like to—”

“Konohamaru!” she whines, and—yeah, when did her whine start sounding sweet?  “What, you’re afraid of messing up that hair you spend hours on?”

“Hours?!” he gasps, offended as she winks at him. Within seconds, she's closing the distance and grabbing his forearms, and he finds his will isn’t so strong now. He's being pulled into the water.

He gasps as he pulls himself back out, coughing slightly as he wipes the water from his eyes. He blinks them up to find her right in front of him, that smile still on her lips. “You don’t look so bad,” she whispers, reaching out to push his hair back and he leans into her touch. Shamefully. She draws her hand back slightly, tilting her head at him as he averts his eyes. “Do you like being touched there?” she chirps, sweet as candy, Konohamaru can almost feel his teeth rotting. She reaches back out, her fingers combing through his hair and he resists the urge to lean in again. He glances at her to find her smile growing. “Like a cute little puppy?”

He has no choice but to dunk her back into the water, or else he might…well, he doesn’t know what. But it couldn’t be good.

As she emerges from the water, swiping it from her eyes and twisting her hair in her hands to wring it out, she giggles.

When had a giggle from Hanabi ever made him do anything except cringe?

And as he fixes his eyes on her, he realizes she's stunning. In the sun, drenched in water, bright, lavender eyes shining up at him, pearly, white teeth sparkling, and divine body, she's drop-dead gorgeous.

And Konohamaru feels terrified as desire grips him.

Hanabi sighs contentedly as she floats in the water, eyes closed and letting it drift her wherever. Konohamaru had gotten out a while ago, not as much of a fan of the water as she.

Konohamaru Sarutobi was evidently succumbing to her charm, she supposed.

There was no other explanation for his change in behavior. She told him she was going to the beach, and he joined her. That in and of itself was completely out of character, he never dared to join her for anything before.

And if she's honest, it's kind of cute.

She wonders if he even realized how often he was turning red, or biting his lip, or rubbing the back of his neck. Or letting his eyes linger on everything except her eyes.

Now Hanabi is in the precarious position of deciding what to do about it.

It is cute, but it's also conflicting.

For the longest time, she had resented Konohamaru.

And it wasn’t just because he had beaten her in the chūnin exams.

It was because he was the golden boy.

He tore through the village, doing as he pleased, when he pleased. He was the Third’s grandson, no one willing to put him in his place except a certain blond-haired idiot himself. He was Moegi and Udon’s best friend, people she also considered friends, but could never form a connection with quite like Konohamaru had as their childhood friendship. He was the village hero's little bro, commanding his attention whenever he wanted, boasting about it, training with him, picking up all his talents.

He was everything she wished she could be. But instead, she was the heiress to a prestigious clan. One might think that entailed certain privileges, and of course, it did. But none that Hanabi cared about. She didn’t care to eat the finest food or be courted by the highest-ranking politicians. She didn’t want to be pampered and fawned over. She didn’t like watching her fellow Hyūga, the branch, bow to her and call her ‘Lady.’

Konohamaru got the best of both worlds. He got to be a regular kid and an important figure in the village.

Hanabi was simply Lady Hanabi, heiress to the Hyūga clan.

Romance was never on her mind when she looked at Konohamaru. She knew other girls tripped over themselves to be close to him, she knew he was charming, and she had heard he was great in bed. But none of that mattered because he was still just Konohamaru. Konohamaru, who endlessly followed Naruto. Konohamaru, who struck down one of the Six Paths of Pein. Konohamaru, who took her out in the chūnin exams.

And now, Konohamaru, who was laying on a towel off in the distance, propped on his elbows, watching her through sunglasses covering those deep, blue eyes. Deep blue eyes that match the ocean she's drifting away in, lost in thoughts of Konohamaru.

And now, Konohamaru, who had let her drag him into the ocean and push him in. Who emerged with his hair slicked back and muscled abdomen shimmering with the water clung to it. Who, when he reached up to stretch, she could catch the deep v of his hips, carved like a damn statue. Who blinked down at her with those eyes that at that moment, matched hers. Laden with hunger.

And they were supposed to share a room together?

Hanabi was hardly surprised that, when she emerged from the ocean and told him she was going back to the room, Konohamaru immediately leaped to his feet and followed after her.

Like a cute little puppy.

Huh. Maybe I could get used to this Konohamaru.

“I’m going to shower,” she says as she pushes the door to their room open. He's silent as he follows her in, and she shrugs, slipping into the bathroom.

Then, his presence follows her again and she squints at him, tilting her head. “I need one, too.”

Her eyes blow wide and she lets out a surprised laugh. “You can wait, dummy!”

“Just keep your bikini on.” He shrugs, closing the door behind him. She lowers her eyebrows at him. “I’ll be my trunks on.” He gestures down at himself and she can’t help but let her eyes follow. That damn v. “I’m itchy as hell, come on—don’t be shy.”

“Pfft.” She rolls her eyes, shakes her head. “Me, shy? Whatever.”

“Thought so.” His teasing voice is behind her as she swiftly twists the nozzle on. She reaches around and grabs his shoulders, then pushes him under the cold water, laughing as he hisses.

“Goddamnit!” he curses, back pressing against the cold tile.

“You insisted!” She pokes her tongue between her teeth, grinning up at him. She gasps as he reaches out and takes her hand, pulling her in, too. She lets herself ‘stumble’, and then they're chest to chest.

Instinctively, his hands come to wrap around her hips, hers on his shoulders, and they both pause.

And Hanabi knows exactly what's going to happen.

Next Chapter ->

[tryingahandinholdingapen]

Team as Family, literally

got a new fic again! this one isn’t for any specific event I just wanted to write it. fluffy little oneshot in which Obito+Kakashi+Team Seven mistakenly time travel to the Warring Clans Era - yes, time travel again, hush - and decide to pretend they’re all family to avoid getting separated and brought to their separate, respective clans or coming under suspicion as potential traitors.

as usual, you can use the link to read on ao3 or I’ve got it here on tumblr under the read more: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43159809

“I think,” Sasuke said dryly, “we may have miscalculated somewhere.”

Yeah no shit Sasuke. More accurately, since it was Naruto who was drawing out the seal, he miscalculated somewhere, right?

Sakura turned towards Naruto, about to accuse him of messing up the seal, only to find both Kakashi and Naruto staring pointedly at Obito, who was not making eye contact.

…Maybe it wasn’t Naruto’s fault then. This time.

“Obito, dearest, love of my life,” Kakashi said, faux-sweet in a way that made the kids take a step back at the implicit threat, “did you just use kamui to join us in the centre of the seal? Instead of walking, like a sensible person?”

Oh. Oh wait. That fucking moron. Sakura joined Kakashi and Naruto in glaring down Obito, noting out of her peripherals that Sasuke looked equally pissed off.

Obito evidently picked up on the danger of Kakashi’s tone as easily as the kids had, nevermind the accusatory stares of said kids, but had nothing with which to defend himself.

“Uh,” he offered, awkwardly.

Kakashi continued on, tone unchanging as he stared his partner down.

“A mangekyou ability that we know is based on space-time? In the very centre of a time-based seal that we were bare seconds away from activating?”

“Someone's in trouble,” Sakura whispered, momentarily more amused over Obito’s dilemma than the group’s time travel problem. Sasuke elbowed her sharply, as though he hadn't just been snickering rather loudly at Obito's predicament, the hypocrite.

“I did...do that, yes.”

“Obito. Why.”

“Well I didn't want to risk messing up the lines by scuffing them or something walking over so I just-”

“-just caused enough interference with the time seal for us to end up in the fucking Warring Clans Era?!” Kakashi's voice finally lost the poison-sweet edge, careening up into hysteria into its place.

…

There was a tense silence as Obito visibly struggled to find any possible way out of this, and Team Seven stared at the now only two adults, torn between amusement and concern over whether they should intervene.

They didn't reach a conclusion before Obito apparently gave up and accepted his fate.

“Uh. I... guess that is a thing I did, yes.”

Kakashi snarled and leapt forward at Obito, who shrieked and clumsily fell back through kamui. There was a split second of peace before Kakashi rolled, picked himself up off the ground and threw himself into kamui in pursuit.

Sakura exchanged looks with the other two, wondering if there was anything they could or should do whilst the pair were gone. Eventually they came to a silent consensus to just settle down and wait for Obito and Kakashi’s return.

After a while of the kids sitting around, waiting and trying to get used to the fact that they were back in their tiny kid bodies – Sasuke fell over several times trying to run through katas, which Sakura was proud to say she managed not to laugh at, unlike Naruto – the only two who got to keep adult (albeit younger) bodies reappeared.

They’d evidently called a truce at some point before exiting kamui, because they didn’t start arguing again, just sat down at opposite ends of the clearing to lick their wounds. Sakura assumed that Kakashi had won their impromptu fight and got Obito to accept the blame for their current situation, since he seemed insufferably smug whilst Obito had decided to invent Sulking Intent and flood the clearing with it.

Glancing around the clearing, she noticed that whilst Naruto was continuing to try and figure out his new smaller body, Sasuke seemed caught up in Obito’s new invention. He was staring down his elder relative with an expression that looked like it couldn’t decide whether it wanted to be fascination, exasperation or disgust. Sakura snickered.

Maybe half an hour later of little conversation, Sakura realised that everyone else in the clearing was putting a lot of effort into ignoring the current situation, which meant it was up to her to point out the obvious problem. Namely, that they were in the Warring Clans Era.

As in, the era in which everyone was expected to stick with their own clans who were generally at odds with each other.

Anyone who intermingled with other clans – everyone in their group but herself – would be under suspicion, as would anyone not currently living with, working for, and known by their respective clans – so, all of them, Sakura on a technicality. As an additional problem, civilian-born shinobi did not even exist in this time yet, which was going to be a problem for Sakura and may also be problematic for Naruto given that he looked considerably more like his civilian-born father than any typical Uzumaki.

If anyone came across their group now, as things were, it was likely that they would quickly jump to unfavourable conclusions. Like bloodline theft, kidnapping, or treason. Disguises or henge were an option, but wouldn't hold up if they came across any sensor who could recognise the boys' very distinctive clan chakra signatures – such as Tobirama Senju, just as the most well-known example from this time.

“So,” Sakura concluded, “we need a cover story. Fast.”

It was probably a good thing that Sakura pointed this out almost immediately, and that they agreed as a group that the task was not one to procrastinate on, because they found themselves having to put their cover story to the test the very next evening.

Naruto had very loudly objected that no, of course there was no bloodline theft happening here, and no kidnapping, how very dare you, we can explain everything.

Obito had followed this up with introducing himself and then giving the agreed-upon story that no, of course Obito was no traitor, he was unfortunately a bastard child and had figured out his Sharingan with a lot of painful trial and error, obviously. This resulted in Izuna Uchiha had then started muttering darkly that he'd have to catch the clan shinobi for another discussion on basic contraceptives when on missions. Meanwhile, Madara fucking Uchiha continued to stare them down.

Sakura found herself panicking at being questioned by these two legends, but quite quickly found herself coming out the other side of terror into a serene kind of zen, tainted mainly by faint nerves over lying but nothing else. She assumed that Kakashi had gone through a similar rapid process, whilst Obito and Naruto were just categorically impossible to surprise. Who knows what was going through Sasuke’s head; his expression had gone very carefully blank so she wasn’t sure what his reaction may be.

“We will be looking into that story later for confirmation. But, sure, let's say for now that I believe your story. What about the rest of you?”

Kakashi raised a lazy hand in acknowledgement, then offered “Kakashi Hatake. This one's boyfriend and partner for...what, a decade?” He glanced to Obito for confirmation, who nodded.

Sakura did a quick bit of maths and realised that yes, their new apparent ages would suggest a decade since the age the two had had the Kannabi Mission. For some morbid reason that she honestly didn’t think she’d ever understand, that mission was when the adults had always told people their relationship began, even though they’d openly admitted to Team Seven that at that point they’d only just stopped claiming to hate each other. Shaking herself out of that eternal question, Sakura refocused on the conversation just in time to hear Obito jump in.

“My Centre.” Obito added to Kakashi’s explanation, which earned the latter an abrupt and intense scrutiny from the brothers in front of them before Madara apparently decided to move on.

Centre? Nobody had mentioned that before…Naruto looked just as confused as she felt, but Sasuke’s attention had suddenly sharpened just like the other Uchihas, so maybe it was a clan thing.

Fuck, she hoped they weren’t going to be quizzed on that or something because she had absolutely no idea what that meant.

“And the kids? No clue where the blonde and pinky might have come from, but I'm really hoping my clan weren't so incompetent that two bastard children were able to find each other so easily. We're going to have so many problems if there are random Uchiha all over the place.”

Unfortunately, this is when Obito and Kakashi fell abruptly silent.

They...probably should have expected this, since their cover story rather required trampling all over the two's grief for their third, but they hadn't and so both Sakura and Sasuke blanked for a moment on how to respond.

Thankfully Naruto, eternally unable to keep his mouth shut and the only remaining one in the group who wouldn't really have to lie much for their cover, chimed in. Never before had Sakura been so grateful for his rambling as she was now that it bought her and Sasuke time to scrape up courage for the lie they were going to have to tell.

“Hey! I'm Naruto Uzumaki, my mom left Uzushio when she was like, super tiny, and eventually married my dad. They adopted Kaka-nii cos his dad died when he was super small and they were friends. My parents got killed because people suck and apparently lone seal-masters are meant to be easy targets, or something, so nii-san took me in and that's why I'm here now.”

He nodded decisively when he finished, out of breath from the rambling explanation. Izuna and Madara stared at him, then just nodded – either accepting what he said or deciding to set it aside as a problem for later – and turned an expectant gaze on the remaining children.

Sakura and Sasuke had a brief, silent struggle over who was going to have to look one of the founders in the eyes and lie to their face, which ended when Sasuke landed a vicious blow to Sakura's torso and shoved her forward whilst she was still wheezing for breath.

Ouch.

Obito snickered somewhere behind the kids, and Sakura reddened before straightening up to face the two Uchiha in front of her.

“Um,” she started, “so, papa and tou-san are dating, right?”

Eyebrows raised, but both adults nodded, Izuna gesturing impatiently for her to continue.

Well excuse her if she needed a minute to get used to referring to her team as her actual family. So weird to be calling her sensei their dad.

“Um. Right. So. The thing is...They're not a couple!” Sakura blurted, and winced at the resulting suspicious, unimpressed looks at the way she’d just immediately seemed to contradict herself. “I mean, they are dating, I just said that, but they're not a couple they're just...all that's left of their triad.” Her voice went very small and quiet as she finished talking.

Suspicion faded to be replaced with sympathy, and Izuna moved forward to crouch near her. His voice was gentle when he prompted her to connect this back to why she and the baby Uchiha were with the group, which was surreal, but whatever. Better than suspicion at least.

Relief that their cover story was working mixed unpleasantly with guilt at using Rin's memory for the lie – kami but she hoped Rin wouldn't mind the way they were using and changing her history for the cover – Sakura found herself stumbling over her words and stuttering a bit when she answered.

"Um. So. Naruto's our brother but he's not blood-related, he's adopted like he just explained...well I guess we're all the adopted ones since it was Naruto's parents who did the adopting but...yeah. I'm related by blood to papa and kaa-san, and Sasuke.”

At the confused glances she realised she hadn’t actually mentioned her or Sasuke’s names, and belatedly clarified, “Oh, uh, Sasuke Uchiha is the name of my other brother. He's related by blood to tou-san and kaa-san, and took tou-san's family name. I took kaa-san's family name: Sakura Haruno, nice to meet you.”

She dipped into a clumsy curtsey at the end, like that would make up for her clumsy explanation.

Somehow she didn’t think it did make up for it, really.

Madara and Izuna looked extremely skeptical of this story, but didn’t ask for further clarification or directly contradict Sakura.

She assumed that was because whilst their cover story did sound incredibly implausible, it technically covered everything with only minor holes to nitpick over…Quickly she ran through a mental checklist of the main things they had to cover.

Obito and Sasuke having Sharingan, but not being known to the Uchiha clan?

Check.

The five of them being together as a group, despite coming from different (or no) clan?

Check.

As far as techniques and abilities went, well.

Kakashi’s techniques and abilities were mostly a mismatch of things that could be blamed either on being a Hatake or dating a Uchiha for so long, so that was fine…

They might have to let Obito’s fictional father take the fall as to why he and Sasuke knew actual clan techniques and had decent mastery of their bloodline limit despite not being a proper part of the clan, but that was very doable.

Sakura’s own healing and chakra-enhanced strength matched up alright with Rin’s history as a medic, so even though she didn’t actually learn from Rin, there was a ready-made explanation there, and of course she inherited the canine contract from Kakashi so there would be no questions there.

They’d already explained that Naruto wasn’t related to them and as far as Sakura knew, the Uchiha at this time didn’t actually know much about the Uzamaki beyond their alliance with the Senju and proficiency with seals, so hopefully they could just blame anything unusual Naruto did on his Uzamaki mom. If not, there was always the Yondaime to blame instead, but that led back to her supposed mother and Naruto’s actual father not being from a large, well-known clan which was…They’d just have to burn that bridge when they got to it, she guessed.

Oh wait apparently Madara had found something he wanted to question after all, shit.

“And the eye-searing pink hair?” He gestured to Sakura abruptly, who was too shocked to respond. That was not a question she’d expected, although in hindsight she really should have. After all her appearance was rather noticeable. But eye-searing? Rude.

Unfortunately her hesitation gave Sasuke time to chime in.

“Well, yeah,” he scoffed, crossing his arms over his chest as he shot a smug, satisfied look at Sakura and the Uchiha of this time equally.

Oh sage what was he going to say that does not bode well.

“Red and white makes pink, you know?” He pointed out, like it was obvious. “And papa’s hair may be technically silver, but it’s white enough to count.”

…

That’s actually a decent explanation. Maybe Sakura was a bit hasty in doubting Sasuke…So they were claiming Rin had been a redhead now, were they? Actually that works out really well, because if they’re – truthfully – claiming that Naruto’s mom was an Uzamaki who left Uzhushio when she was little, then Rin being a redhead would potentially solve the issue of someone from an unknown/nonexistent clan becoming a shinobi.

The timeline would just have to be that first Kakashi’s dad and Naruto’s parents became friends, then Kakashi’s dad died and he got adopted by Naruto’s parents, and after that Naruto’s mom saw a lone redhead – sorry Rin, Sakura felt a brief spike of remorse, we’re gonna have to write your family out of the picture for this to work – and decided to train her out of some nostalgia or homesickness. That would explain Rin having been a kunoichi, it would explain Rin and Kakashi knowing each other, it would explain Sakura’s very noticeable pink hair, it would even explain Naruto’s dad because if they were already claiming that his mom had a tendency towards training non-relatives to be shinobi than it was totally plausible to say she started training him at the same time they started dating. That only left explaining how Obito ended up joining the group, but again if Naruto’s mom was in the habit of taking others in, and then she saw a lone bastard child struggling to manage a bloodline he knew nothing about…

This was perfect, Sasuke had just managed to cover every remaining tiny hole in their cover story at once!

Sakura beamed at him, ignoring the way Sasuke looked rather surprised before controlling his expression again – probably he just hadn’t thought his comment through as thoroughly as she had yet – as she nodded in enthusiastic confirmation of his explanation.

Everything was going to be just fine.

[writer-kermit]

After School Tutorials…

Pairing: College Professor!Kakashi Hatake x College Student!Reader

Genre: Smut

Commissioned or Self Made: Self Made

Word Count: 1,838

Summary: You're failing Kakashi's class, so he decides to teach you a lesson.

A/N: If you would like a commission, ask me in my DMS or Ko-Fi Page.

Warning: NSFW, Teacher x Student, Teasing, Humiliation, Spanking, Biting, Overstimulation, Begging, Degradation, Dumbification, Teacher kink, Dom Play, MDNI

“Hey, what did you get for that last exam?”

“I got a sixty four out of one hundred. That exam was really hard.”

“No way! That exam was super easy! I got a ninety seven out of one hundred.”

“Well not everyone is a ‘know it all’ like you ……!”

“Well maybe you’re just a moron. Anyways [....], what did you get for the exam?”

…

“Oi! [....]! ”

A hand was wavering around your face, causing you to jolt back from your seat. “Huh? I-I’m up!” You stammered. Your two classmates looked at you as if you were a clown. The friend who woke you up–Sakura Haruno repeated the question to you.

“[....]. Me and dumbass Naruto here,”

“Hey!” Naruto Uzumaki interrupted. “I’m not a dumbass! It ain’t my fault that the test was hard!” He puffed his cheeks and Sakura rolled her eyes. “Anyways, after I was rudely interrupted! What did you get for the exam [....]?” Sakura asked again. You looked down at your desk. You then took a sheet with your exam grade and read it to your classmates. You can feel their shock reaction despite not seeing it for yourself.

“Damn [....],” Naruto said, “That’s even a more awful score than I got..” You shrugged at Naruto’s comment while Sakura punched him in the head, she then quickly got back to her composure. “[....], aren’t you concerned that your grade is so low?” She asked you. “Meh, I can just retake it. And besides,” You leaned on your chair. “If I fail college, then I’ll just get a sugar daddy, easy as that!”

“Excuse me [....]?”

A voice called out, hushing the classroom. You turned around to see your professor, Mr. Kakashi Hatake glaring at you maliciously. “You can be a sugar baby all you want when you leave my class, but I expect you to actually try on my exams. I know you had quite a bad score with your (...)%”

You felt your face heat up with embarrassment as you heard other students whisper and snicker behind you. “Since you want to act like a fool in class, why not meet me after school today?” “Y-yes sir..” You muttered, lowering your head in shame. A small smirk crept up in the inside of his mask.

“That’s my good student.”

The class then erupts with students' gossip as Naruto and Sakura gaze at you with concern. “Oh you’re in for it now [....].” Naruto warned. “I hate to say it, but I have to agree with Naruto. Do you have any idea what you’re getting yourself into?” You innocently shook your head. Sakura sighed and whispered in your ear. “Well, I heard he sometimes gets students suspended. And some were expelled. She then placed her hands on your shoulders.

“You gotta be careful [....]. Who knows what he might do to you?” “Yeah,” Naruto agreed, “we’ll be praying for you.” You then let out a reassuring chuckle. “Don’t worry guys, I’ll be fine. What’s the worst that could happen?”

You shouldn’t have said that.

You should NOT have said that.

Or maybe you should’ve…

Now Professor Kakashi is one of the most easy going teachers you could ever have. However, he can have his serious moments. But there was another side of him that you would have never expected. Well now mentioning it, it’s quite obvious that he was rather ‘strange’.

You stood there in front of your teacher’s door, clutching your school bag, you knocked on the door three times until you heard a “come in”. You opened the door to see Kakashi already at his front desk.

“I’m glad you came here [....].” He spoke. “Yeah…” You sighed, averting your eyes from your teacher. “I’m sorry about what I said earlier. I didn’t necessarily mean what I said.” Through his mask, Kakashi gave out a comforting smile. “That’s alright, but I didn’t call you in for that at all.” “Oh really?” “Remember, I’m here to help with your exams,” Kakashi got up from his seat and walked towards you. He leaned his back to reach your gaze, the silence was enough for you to hear your own heartbeat.

“So please be thankful that I’m being generous enough to guide you. Most of your college professors wouldn’t do that…”

“...Y-yes!” You gulped. Kakashi smiled again and went back to his desk and sat down.

“Now, I have some of your papers that we need to review, so would you come here.” He asked in an odd tone, gesturing you to come next to him. You obeyed his order and walked over to his desk, standing right next to him. You leaned forward in hope to see your corrections. “You know [....]...” Kakashi whispered, pulling you in by your waist. “If you have issues looking down, how about you just sit on my lap?” You darted your eyes to Kakashi, who was still using that devilish smirk to antagonize you.

“W-what?! Professor! I-” ‘‘Now, now [....]. We’re the only people inside the campus, and it’s not like you were denying me.” Well, he wasn’t wrong about that. You abided by his order and sat down on his lap and his arms instantly went around your waist.

“Now let’s begin with our lessons shall we?”

….

“Now, this won’t be so easy-peasy.” Kakashi warned. “If you get a question right, then I’ll give you a reward. But,” He rested his chin on your shoulder, causing you to shiver with pleasure. “If you get any answer wrong, I’ll have to give you a punishment. Understand [....]?” “Yes sir…” You whimpered. Kakashi smiled and then guided you to the first question.

“Alright question one…” He read you the first question, and you wrote down your answer. He looked at your answer digitally and looked at another paper he was holding.

“Congrats [....]. Your answer is… Incorrect.” He whispered, pulling down his mask to nibble on your ear. Your body jolted from the sudden action as a moan escaped from your lips. “H-hah! Mmnngh.. Ahnnn… K-Kakashiii…” You moaned, arching your back. Your professor chuckled warmly at you. “Look at you baby..” He cooed. “Already a moaning mess when I barely did anything to you.” He hugged you tightly before asking you the next question. Still vulnerable, you wrote down the answer. Kakashi then repeated what he did for your first answer choice, the sinister smile on his face grew.

“And ding dong… You’re absolutely wrong…” He purred. He dived to your neck, kissing and sucking on your skin and creating hickey patches. Kakashi used his free hand to slide up your uniform shirt, feeling and pinching at your nipples. “Kakashi?!” You yelped. “W-what? What are you doing?” “Huh?” Kakashi mocked. “Don’t act like you’ve been craving for this [....]. You’ve wanted me to do this from the start, haven't you?”

You shook your head in denial. “Why else would you gaze at me with those flirtatious eyes of yours? Why else would you have arch your back so far up to my desk just to sharpen a pencil, just so I can see your plump ass? And of course..” He got up close to your ear again.

“Why else would you fail almost all of your assignments and exams for me to help you?” Ooh he got you there. “But..” You protested. “Oh? Are you trying to defend yourself, trying to saying that you’re sooo dumb that you need me to take baby steps with you?” He held up your chin and kissed your cheek.

“My cute dumb little student…”

His hand then traveled from your chest down to your pants. You let his hand play with your sex, shoving his fingers inside of you. Causing you to moan loudly. “Ohhh Fuck! Kakashhii~! Kakashi please…” “That’s professor Kakashi to you.” He said sternly. “Ahhnn, I’m so sorry.. Please, please forgive me..” You begged. “Hmm, perhaps… Unless you do a pop quiz..” Kakashi placed down a five question quiz sheet. He then ordered you to stand up only for you to be bent down towards the sheet, revealing your naked ass.

You knew exactly what he was gonna do next.

“Now, depending on how many times you get a question right or wrong, I’ll either fuck you faster or slower. Alright baby?” You let out a sigh and nodded your head. Kakashi then removed his own pants, revealing his swollen cock. You almost screamed as he leaned towards your back and slid inside of you, penetrating your prostate. You quickly relaxed and got into the rhythm of Kakashi humping you slowly. “Ahaha.. Go on baby..” He groaned. You answered the first question. You did as he said and circled your answer. Kakashi stopped for a moment, grabbed a pen and wrote a check mark on the first question.

“That is correct..” He cooed, making you giggle. He then resumed again, only now, he was humping you more slower than usual. Almost as if he were teasing you. “Ahhnn.. A-ahh! Professor… Please… Please go faster…” You whined, clenching on the edge of the desk. “Hmm.. How about instead of whining, how about you use your mouth and hands to answer the next question!”

He smacked your ass in response to your complaints, causing you to shriek and arch your back. You hurriedly answer the next question. Kakashi stopped to look at the sheet again. Kakashi then grabbed his pen and wrote an “X” on the sheet. Kakashi smiled and then guided you to the first question.

“Sorry [....], that’s wrong..” He then resumed again, humping at the earlier pace he was in. Your fingers trembled as you tried to write the answer to the third question. When you did, Kakashi wrote another “X” mark silently.

“Wrong again? You must be doing this on purpose now aren’t you?” “Haah.. Maybe I am..” You sassed, earning you another slap in the ass. “Don’t you know better not to talk back to your teacher?” He groaned, fucking you deeper inside of you. The feeling was enough for you to whimper and moan excessively, tears were blurring your eye vision. You struggled answering the next question. But Kakashi purposely wrote your answer wrong, knowing damn well it was correct to spite you.

“Ohoho.. Wrong.. Wrong.. WRONG!” He yelled, slapping your ass for the third time. “You’re just a dumb little slut are you huh? But you’re my dumb slut got it?” “Ahhnn~! Fuck.. Fuck..! P-professor~! I’ll be your dumb slut.. Make me yours~!” “Yeah? Is that so? Then take my cock.. Take my cock as I cum inside of you. That is an order from your professor…” You moaned loudly as Kakashi then slammed hard on your back as he cummed violently inside of you. He then slumped down on top of you.

Kakashi then locked your hands with his own and kissed your ear. “That’s a good student.. Relax for me now okay..?” He asked, his voice now softening. You did what he said and relaxed your body slowly. “Yeah that’s it… You’ll always be my dumb little student now won’t you?” You smiled and let out a sweet sigh. “Yes professor,” you replied.

“I’ll always be your dumb little student..”

[wooobuddyletsgetnasty]

oh to be mean to a needy naruto.

he’s been gone on a mission for weeks, and he missed you so fucking much.

he crowds you against the nearest door way of your house, cock barely out of his pants as he grinds against your hip, mouth parted an heaving against your throat— he wants to kiss you there, taste you, feel you— it’s been so long.

it’s every bit crude, and you can feel irritation bubbling in your chest— he hasn’t even said hello to you yet.

so you start in, “needy thing, huh? can’t even get your dick all the way out, missed me that fucking much?”

an he’s just mumbling against the warmth of you, agreeing with everything you’re saying, the scent of him making you dizzy.

“gonna cum without even getting your dick wet, naruto? are you? pathetic.”

all you get in response is a chant of ‘yes yes yes yes’ his voice breaking with every syllable, hips jerking wildly against the meat of your thigh.

you can feel his canines sink into the delicate skin of your neck, his fingers gripping tighter at the globes of your ass.

and this time, your voice is the sweetest it’s ever been, his name falling from your mouth like honey, “naruto, if you make a mess, i’ll make you lick it up.”

his hips grind harder against you than before—hushed, choked curses falling from his mouth. he just needs a little more, you can feel it in his movements.

“come on, naruto— fuckin’ cum.”

and then he does. he comes with your name on his tongue like a prayer. he comes hard enough he thinks his legs might give out, and when he pieces himself back together, he gives you the grin that makes your heart drop to your pussy.

and then he settles on his knees, all doe eyed and dumb— sweet, slurred praises of how much he missed you falling from his spit-slicked lips.

ok, goodbye. i will see myself out. thanks for comin to my ted talk.

[sup-hoes-its-me]

Happy (Naruto x Reader)

Request: "I was thinking of something that Naruto and Reader have been best friends for a long time, and one day she gets hurt on a mission, and he cries, but in the end everything ends well."

A/N: request for @writing-x-reader sorry it took so long, end of the semester has been very difficult. Also my first naruto fic. We will see how it goes. Hope I did your request justice! Not proof read at all, sorry about that.

Word count: 3000

_____

Jeez, how was it that someone like her managed to meet someone as perfect as him? It felt surreal.

She wanted to kiss him. She felt herself leaning forward just slightly, feeling her heart rate beat swiftly in her chest at the sight of his tired eyes laying beside her. He blew out steady breaths through his lips, and she thought they looked more kissable than ever before. He was such a sweet guy, so handsome and kind and brave, and everything in between. She wanted  him to be completely hers, but that wasn’t happening.

So she laid back down beside him on the plush grass and sighed. 

Could they ever be anything more than friends?  It seemed impossible. He had that long time crush on Sakura, for one. But he was also so dumb when it came to love and all those things. He couldn’t get her hints, and she was too shy to just tell him outright. It just seemed like a hopeless dream to think they would ever date. 

“Y/N?”

“Yeah?” 

“You got a piece of something stuck in your hair.” Her hands ran to touch the strands that hung around her head, and he just laughed with a shake of his head. “Let me get it,” he told her softly, reaching out to take a piece of leaf from her hair. She felt her cheeks begin to heat up at his touch, and his kindness, and the way he was looking at her like she was the only thing in the world that mattered.

"Thanks."

"You know, you should wear your hair down more often. It looks really nice on you. I like it," the blond commented, his head propped up in his hand, hair falling into his face and shading over his eyes. He had that kind smile across his face, whiskers and all just adding to the look she adored.

Her cheeks grew warmer at his words and she opened her mouth to say something but nothing came out. Her nerves had silenced her. Instead, she simply shook her head and lowered her eyes, too bashful to maintain the eye contact.

"You- You're beautiful, you know? You really shouldn't be so shy."

Her heart raced at his words, and Y/N felt herself falling into a state of confusion and frustration. How could he say those things so casually, when to her it felt like he was playing with her entire heart in his hands? He was just so nice, and he always knew the right thing to say to make her like him even more, even deeper than she realized.

"Naruto..."

He laughed, leaning back against the grass and kicking one leg over the other. "What? Just being honest. Thought girls liked compliments?"

"No, no, I do. Thank you. I really should build confidence but it's not as easy as you think."

It was quiet for a moment, and she took that as her chance to get away, to clear her head and sort through all these conflicting thoughts.

Quickly, she gathered herself up and stood from the grass. She couldn’t be here anymore. She felt too many conflicting emotions running through her mind. She just wanted to be with him, but that was impossible. It made her stomach turn at the thought, and she just needed to get away, run as far as she could so she could be alone with her embarrassing crush on the hero of the leaf.

“I’ve got to go, Naruto.”

“Aw, really? It was so much fun just chilling here with you.”

He was having a good time? Of course he was, they were best friends. They wouldn't be friends if he didn't have a fun time when she was around. She shook her head softly to drown out her loud thoughts. “I’ll see you on our mission tomorrow, yeah?”

“Yep. See you.”

“Bye.”

She walked off with heat in her cheeks and heart resting upon her sleeve. She was just so stupid. Crushing on someone so unattainable. The next opportunity she got to confess to him, she would. Just get it done instead of obsessively thinking about it all the time. It was driving her insane, and she needed to fix the situation. Whatever happened, she just hoped they remained friends afterwards. 

He was a sweet guy, he would most likely stay her friend and just forget about everything, right? 

Just stop thinking about it all, she scolded herself. It wqould only make her more nervous, or even avoid confessing at all. What had to be done, would be done. Whether they stayed the same afterwards or not would be a different story, and she could only hope for the best.

_______

The blade came down upon Y/N with enough strength to pierce her skin and run all the way down her chest, tearing through the skin and some muscle as it did so. She cried out, so  surprised by the attack that her eyes widened and she had to do a double take. That man was behind her just a second ago, how did he get so close so fast? She didn’t know. All she knew was that blood was soaking deep into her tunic. 

If she had the strength left in her lungs, she would call out for her teammate, for Ino, to come and help her. She was a medical nin, right? But her chest ached, and the most she could get from her lips was a mere whisper. 

Everything hurt. Her body burned like fire had touched it, and her skin was hot and sticky to the touch.

She laid back on the ground, without any hope. Someone would get to her when they finished whatever they were doing, she just had to wait. It couldn’t be long.

And it wasn’t.

Naruto stood above her in an instant, and he was quick to fall to his knees at her side. His hands anxiously hovered over the long cut from the knife, and if she were seeing correct, they were shaking fiercely. The strong and brave Naruto brought to a quivering state? She couldn’t believe it. Maybe if he had found Sakura lying here instead, she could understand, but not her. She wasn’t anything special. 

“Y/N? Y/N? Are you alright?” he asked, leaning in closer to her face. 

“I'll be okay,” she whispered, reaching her hand out to latch onto one of his. He grabbed up her hand the second he saw her struggle, and cradled it within his own, squeezing maybe a little too hard for comfort, but she could definitely manage. She could feel the heart radiating from his warm hands into her dripping cold ones. A small smile crossed her lips at the feeling, holding his hands. It was nice.

“Y/N, please. Ino- I don’t know where Ino went. Just keep trying for a little longer,” he pleaded,and at this point, she noticed the tears that were brimming his eyes, sliding down his cheeks so silently, she probably wouldn’t notice them any other time if she weren’t so entranced by his features through the hazy lens. “Please, don’t die.”

“I-I don’t know, Naruto.”

“Yes, you do know! Don’t just give up , please! Don’t give up for me, okay?” he exclaimed, and she winced at the height of his voice. Quickly, the boy hushed down, collapsing down at her side from all the sadness seeping into his body. “You just can’t die. I need you,” he whimpered, wiping away at his tears with his shoulder.

“Naruto-”

“I know you’re my best friend, and I know you don’t see me this way, but I love you, Y/N. I’ve felt that way for the longest time,” he confessed, and she felt her heart pick up in her chest, skipping a beat at the sudden confession. He loved her. Naruto Uzumaki, the boy of her dreams, was in love with her. She was high on the endorphins running through her body, and  a soft smile lifted on her face. He only clutched at her hands harder, tears continuing to drip heavily down his cheeks. “You are just so perfect. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

She knew she didn’t have much time left. She was slipping across the line of consciousness, and she just wanted to get in one more thought before drifting to sleep for a while. 

“I-I love you, too, Naruto.”

“Okay, so live! You have to now. We have to go on dates and everything! Come on, Y/N, please!” he cried, more hysterical now than ever. She sighed, knowing that there was nothing she could do to mend away those painful tears. She was dying right here in front of him and there was nothing anyone could do. They just had to wait until Ino found them and hopefully heal her enough that she could live. It was worth a shot.

And if she died? So be it. She was content. In her last moments, she felt Naruto’s love completely fill her heart and mind. That was the most she could hope for in a situation like this, being surrounded by someone who cares about you so immensely it hurts. She squeezed his hands gently, as she felt her eyes closing. He pleaded with her once again, but to no avail, she was out like a light. 

He kept on crying, harder now that she was gone and he couldn’t even see her eyes anymore, or hear another word leave her mouth. He felt like everything was coming crashing down on him at once. His poor friend was lying in front of his dying, and he couldn’t do anything to help her besides leaving the body alone to look for Ino, or just wait. He wasn’t too found of the thought of abandoning her body out here in the woods like that.

He clutched at her cold hand in his shaky ones, trying to feel some comfort in the skin to skin touch. Anything to bring her back to him and make him feel like things were okay again.

Ino rushed out of the forest as fast as she could after hearing Naruto call her name a couple times out in the open. Her eyes widened at the sight in front of her. Y/N looked dead. Her body was so covered in blood she couldn’t make out an inch of her shirt that wasn’t soaked in it.

“What happened to Y/N?”

“I don’t even know. One second she was fine and the next she looked like this!” Naruto cried as Ino crouched one the other side of her body. Immediately, she set to work healing, and thankfully, there was enough chakra flowing through the girl’s body to signal a swift recovery. Ino wasn’t sure if she’d ever seen Naruto a blubbering mess the way he was right now. He was crying and sobbing, and shaking like a poor little leaf. The blond rightfully felt terrible for not being there sooner.

“Naruto, what’s wrong? Y/N is going to be fine, I promise.”

“I couldn’t even protect her. I love her so much, and I let this happen to her. What sort of friend does that make me?” he cried, trying desperately to wipe the tears from his eyes so Ino couldn’t see anymore. Guess it doesn’t matter though,  does it?

“You love her?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, she definitely loves you, too,” Ino sighed, continuing her work. She could feel Y/N getting better with every second that passed by, and she hoped there wouldn’t be any permanent damage. There was no way to tell right now, so she would just wait.

Naruto’s brows perked, and he asked, “What? How do you know?”

“She’s told me. Like, a bunch of times.”

Naruto sat back, falling flat on his butt in surprise. Y/N loved him? For a while? She liked him enough to divulge in her crush to friends? How did he never notice? They were best friends, he was around her almost all the time. How could she keep something like that a secret? He thought he’d made it more than obvious that he had a crush on her, but he guessed she never noticed that either. 

He was confused, rightfully so. Finding out your friend has a crush on is weird enough, but it being requited is a completely different thing. What would happen after this? Would they date? Was that even an option? Would she even want to? Maybe when she said I love you, she meant it as a friend. That could be it. 

He really just couldn’t make up his mind.

He would just have to wait until they got home, when she was awake and sound of mind, before they could figure out what was going on between them. The waiting would kill him, he was sure of it. But it had to be done.

______

When they arrived back at the village, Y/N was taken to the infirmary immediately. She was hooked up to machines and laid down in a white, sterile room away from Naruto’s prying eyes. Rightfully so, he was anxious to see her. They had just confessed their love to each other, what else could be more pressing than that?

The boy walked around in spiraling circles through the waiting room awaiting the doctor to peek her head in and inform him of her condition. And she did, after a couple hours. She walked into the room and told him it was time to go and visit her, she would be waking up any time now.

She lay still in the bed, only soft breaths bringing her chest to rise and fall. He collapsed into the seat beside her bed and reached out, taking a hold of her hand and squeezing it. Maybe if he continued to squeeze her hand, she would wake up sooner, he thought. He needed to see her, to hear her voice, anything. Just seeing her laying in this bed was driving him insane. There was too much to talk about.

And when her eyes started to open, he found himself practically jumping up from his chair to be closer to her. She groaned, lifting her other hand to rub at her tired eyes. 

“Y/N?”

“Naruto?” she asked in her sleepy state, confused as to why he would be there of all people. She turned her head to see the ball of sunshine sitting beside her, holding her hand even, and staring her right in the eyes. She felt heat begin to fill her cheeks. Was he that excited to make sure she was okay?

“I’m so glad you’re okay. I was so worried about you.”

“I-I’m sorry for making you worry so much,” she found herself mumbling the first thought that came to her mind, no matter how silly it may have been.

 He clutched at her hand, shaking his head furiously at what she had just said. “Stop! Don’t say sorry! It’s my fault for not protecting a teammate out there.” It wasn’t his responsibility to make sure she was okay the entire time, he had other priorities of course. She sighed, shaking her head, but not arguing with him.

"You're right. But you did help me out when I was down and I appreciate that."

"Of course! It's what a good guy does," he chirped, but his mind was obviously on something else that they had avoided so far in their conversation. His eyes trailed to the table beside her, not wanting to look her in the eyes as he brought it up. "About what we said back there."

"Yeah, the confessions…"

He asked, doubt just now creeping up in the back of his mind, "You meant it, right?" She was in distress. It could have been a love confession out of desperation. He was definitely over thinking things, something he rarely did. He was so straightforward. Just calm down, he told himself.

"I meant what I said. I hope you meant everything you said too," she told him, still feeling that heat creeping up her neck and ears now. So embarrassing. 

"You bet I did! I'm so happy you like me back! I've liked you for so long, Y/N."

"So that means we can go on dates like you said? Ramen dates, maybe?"

"Ooohh, Ichiraku dates. Sounds so good."

He was happier than he ever felt before, high off life and love and just so much emotion it was bubbling out. He smiled at his new found girlfriend, just watching as she went on about cute date ideas they could go on, her eyes lighting up and her lips curled up in a sweet smile he loved.

Times were good. So freaking good.

[animeomegas]

Omega!Naruto - Family Night

Now I’m so curious as to what a typical family night would entail with the boys! When the kids are pretty young and they finally have some time off and their alpha also has some time off to spend together? 👉🏻👈🏻with house husband itachi because that is the only way><

I assume you want the Naruto boys, I’m going to post them one at a time, so I can keep active this week. Up first is Naruto!

Warnings: Mpreg (implied)

Naruto:

As Hokage, it was rare for Naruto to get a full day off without some emergency calling him back to work, but today he had left Shikamaru in charge, (against his will), so that he could come home to spend the evening with you and his children.

And what better way to spend time together than with a board game!

Naruto picked up a simple board game (suitable for younger children) on his way home, knowing that you had sorted out the snacks last night.

“I’m home!” Naruto calls out, shuffling through the front door with the new game and a couple of stacks of paperwork in hand.

“Daddy!” He heard his eldest son shout, followed by the sound of little footsteps sprinting towards the door.

Naruto put the bags on the floor in preparation, crouching down and holding out his arms as his son flew around the corner with a huge grin on his face.

“Oof,” Naruto had the wind knocked out of him as his son barrelled straight into his chest. He stood up, holding his son tightly in his arms.

“You’re getting so big now!” Naruto exclaimed, over dramatically wheezing as his son giggled. “Can’t believe you’re already nine, soon I won’t be able to pick you up anymore!”

His son gasped and tightened his arms around Naruto’s neck.

“No, I always want daddy to pick me up.”

“Hmm,” Naruto hummed thoughtfully. “I suppose daddy’s just going to have to train more so he can keep doing it then, huh?”

His son nodded furiously. “Yes, daddy, I think that’s a good idea.” He then nuzzled his face into Naruto’s shoulder, taking a deep breath of his father’s scent and purring gently. Naruto purred back, pressing a kiss onto his son’s head.

At that moment, you rounded the corner, a one-year-old twin in each arm, smiling tiredly at him.

“Looks like someone is trying to get out of doing their homework again,” you teased your son. “You know we aren’t playing the board game until all homework is done.”

Your son huffed but wiggled his way out of Naruto’s embrace and made his way back to the kitchen table to join his sister to finish his homework.

You and Naruto both laughed gently at his antics, before moving to embrace each other, careful not to crush the twins.

“Missed you,” you murmured.

“Missed you, too,” he responded.

You stayed like that for a few seconds, just enjoying each other’s warmth, before one of the twins reached up and yanked Naruto’s hair.

Naruto swore lightly under his breath, before trying to remove the tiny hand clenched in his hair. Both twins were giggling at his struggle. You suppressed your own laughter.

“I told you these two are going to be trouble,” you laughed.

“Yeah,” Naruto grumbled, rubbing the sore spot on his head, “I can see what you mean.”

“Daddy!” came a voice from the kitchen, “Can you come here, please?”

“Oh,” you remembered. “She wants you to proofread her homework before she gives it in on Monday.”

Naruto nodded. “I can do that. Coming!”

Naruto headed into the kitchen, where his oldest children were working on homework. It looked like his son was working on maths homework from his civilian school, while his daughter was writing about the history of the Shinobi nations for the Academy.

“Can you read this please?” his daughter asked, shoving a piece of paper in his face.

Naruto slipped into the chair beside her and picked up the document to read. He felt his eyebrows raise up the more he read. It always astounded him how good his daughter was at history.

“How is it?” she asked, fidgeting with her fingers a little.

“Honestly?” he started, “Better than most of the mission reports I have to read. Good job!” He praised her, ruffling her hair.

She grinned at him, carefully rolling the paper up and slipping it into her school bag.

“How was your day at school today?”

“Great!” His daughter exclaimed. “Uncle Sasuke’s daughter beat up this boy in the playground for pulling her hair! It was awesome!”

Naruto snorted, not surprised in the slightest.

“Sounds like fun,” he laughed. “Why don’t you go and help set up for game night while I finish up the homework with your brother?”

Once all the homework was complete, everyone settled down on the living room floor, surrounded by plenty of snacks.

The twins had been put to bed, and now you, Naruto and your two oldest children were ready to play the game.

Your son had dragged half of his nest with him, laying blankets and pillows down next to Naruto before climbing onto his father’s lap and refusing to sit anywhere else.

 Seeing as they were sitting together, you decided to play in teams; Naruto and your son vs you and you daughter.

The game was fiercely competitive. Well, your son was a lot more focused on getting cuddles from Naruto, but everyone else was very invested!

In the end, you and you daughter won! Her excellent strategic skills coming in handy!

It was late by the time the game had finished, and everyone, stuffed with junk food, was starting to get sleepy.

You left to check in the twins in the nursery while Naruto tucked your other children into bed.

His daughter always wanted to talk more about her day before bed, so Naruto sat on her bed, gently stroking her hair while she talked about her day.

“-and then I said he was being stupid, and I got sent out into the hall! Which wasn’t fair because he was being an idiot.”

Naruto nodded, still listening with full attention. He always enjoyed the faces of his shinobi when they realised he knew every bit of academy gossip. Those with children in the academy could guarantee that Naruto knew more about what they did there, than they did.

“-and then you came home, so you know the rest.”

“Sounds like an eventful day,” Naruto laughed gently. “I’m very proud of you for working so hard on your homework today. Maybe try not to get kicked out of class again though.”

“Iruka sensei said that you didn’t even come to class most the time.”

Naruto choked on nothing, flushing pink. “Well… Iruka sensei is exaggerating a bit, but school is very important okay?”

“Okay, daddy,” she whispered, eyes already closing.

“Good girl, sweet dreams.”

Naruto left the room quietly, leaving her door open a crack, before heading to his son’s room. His son was already ready for bed, sitting patiently, waiting for him to come and tuck him in.

“Hey, buddy,” Naruto whispered, stepping fully into the room. “Ready for bed?”

“Yep, but,” he hesitated. “I don’t want to go to bed yet.”

Naruto frowned slightly, moving to sit on his bed with him.

“Why not? You not tired yet?”

His son shook his head, playing with one of the many blankets on his bed.

“Then why?” Naruto asked gently, stroking his son’s head.

His son didn’t answer but climbed onto Naruto’s lap.

“Will you be here when I wake up?” he asked, voice muffled into Naruto’s shoulder.

Naruto sighed sadly. “I have to go to work, my sweet boy, I’m sorry.”

His son started to cry and sniffle into Naruto’s shoulder. Naruto’s heart broke more and more with every sob/

“Shh, shh,” he hushed him, rocking him slightly and purring to try and calm him down. “Please don’t cry…”

“Don’t want you to go!” His son wailed, gripping tightly onto Naruto’s shirt.

“Shh, shh, calm down, I’m right here,” Naruto tried desperately to soothe his son. “You don’t have school tomorrow, right?”

His son nodded.

“How about you come and spend lunch with me, yes? You could go and grab some ramen and bring it to my office and we can have lunch?” Naruto offered, desperately hoping it was enough to calm him down.

His son considered the offer for a moment, before slowly nodding once again.

Naruto let out a sigh of relief.

“There we go,” Naruto settled his son back into bed. “I’ll see you tomorrow at lunch, okay, don’t forget!”

“I’ll never forget, daddy!”

Naruto smiled proudly at him. “I know you wouldn’t.”

Naruto leaned down for one last cuddle, scenting a cuddly toy for his son, before leaving his room with a soft ‘Goodnight’.

You were standing right outside the door, obviously having heard the previous conversation. You gestured for him to follow you back into the living room. Naruto slumped onto the sofa, head in his hands.

“It’s not your fault, Naruto,” you whispered to him, sitting beside him and taking him into your arms.

Naruto laughed bitterly. “It feels like it is. He shouldn’t have to miss his own father that much; I should be here.”

“You are here,” you disagreed, rubbing circles on his back. “You’re doing as much as you can, and as long as you keep joining us for family nights and having lunch together, no one can accuse you of not loving your family enough.”

Naruto let out a breath, sagging like a puppet with cut strings. “Sorry, it’s just hard sometimes. I can’t stand it when he cries for me, it makes me feel awful.”

“I know, baby, I know.”

“I don’t want him to grow up without me, he’s already so big, I feel like I’ve missed so much.”

“You haven’t, baby, I promise. They all look up to you and love you so much.”

“Yeah…” Naruto leaned back fully into your embrace, feeling a little better. “I guess…”

“Come on, I think we should both get some sleep before the twins decide it’s play time again.”

Naruto whined in disagreement. “Let’s cuddle here for a bit longer.”

You laughed at his dramatics, but agreed, pulling him firmly into your arms, and settling onto the sofa. Naruto pulled a blanket from the arm and laid it over you both.

“This is nice,” he purred, pressing a few kisses to your neck.

“Yeah, it is,” you tightened your grip around him slightly. “Relax as best as you can, baby, you deserve it.”

[scuttle-buttle]

Chapter 5

WC: 902

Rated: E

Chapter Tags: implied sexual context/references to sexual content, sexting, fluff, domestic, alcohol consumption

🧠

A few days have passed since you caught up with Dr. Stratton. You didn’t tell Laszlo about joining the study. Instead, you had hoped to use what you learned from Dr. Stratton more naturally, so to speak. You had decided that you needed to know what you and the good doctor could get up to in the bedroom. Or perhaps shower, study, kitchen…. you smirk at the idea. So far your sex life had been quite conservative, with the exception of the first day in his office and last week by his front door. Timing was essential.

It was a Wednesday night, and Laszlo had wanted you to stay over with him. Much to his displeasure, you had plans with your roommate that evening. You hated to feel as though you were neglecting her. Sipping on your glass of wine, you continue explaining the fetish study you had signed up for. “So anyway I start tomorrow with Stratton, and it’s just going to be the basic stuff really. Interview me about my sex life and what I’m into and things like that.”

Bitsy lifts up her finger for you to pause as she swallows her wine. “Hold on - are you going to tell her about Kreizler?”

“Oh no, no. Stratton’s cool and I’m sure she wouldn’t care, but I don’t think Laz would be alright with it. It’s still pretty hush.” She nods into her wine glass. You lick your lip, deciding to really open up with her. “But I have decided that I’m going to make the best of this, Bits. I’m going to see what I can use and try it with him. I can’t stop thinking about last week still and I just have to know.”

Bitsy laughs at how desperate you sound as you lean towards her on the couch. “Don’t laugh! I never knew it could be this good, ugh,” you moan.

“Well be careful or you’re gonna end up breaking something.” She eyes you up before turning to refill her glass. “And besides, Kreizler ain’t as young as he used to be - don’t give the poor doc a heart attack.”

You smirk into your own glass. “Oh he’s not that old.” You both snicker at the implication.

A few hours later and you found yourself in bed, alone. You had always favored sleeping alone, but in the last two months you had gotten used to falling asleep in the presence of Laszlo. The sounds of the city outside blurred together in your ears. Turning to the clock you see it is nearing midnight. Even though you knew he would likely be asleep, you still pull up his contact in your phone, hitting the button to open your messages.

You: Is it bad that I miss you?

Dropping your phone on your stomach you stare at the ceiling. A minute later your phone dings.

Laz: That is a completely normal reaction to have when you become used to being in a person’s presence.

You laugh softly to yourself; how very Laszlo of him. Readying to type a response, the phone goes off again.

Laz: I miss you as well, Bärchen. Did you have fun tonight?

You: I did yeah.

An idea crosses your mind. You knew you wanted to try new things with him, and the newest thing these days with young adults was the use of technology in the bedroom. Quickly typing, you send another text before he can respond.

You: But I think I could have had fun with you too 🍆👅.

Laszlo: You are hungry? I know a recipe for Ratatouille, perhaps we can make dinner this weekend.

You: As nice as that sounds, it’s not what I’m in the mood for.

Laz: I’m not sure I understand.

Oh the poor man… Thankful that you had worn a cuter pair of underwear today, you shift yourself into a more seductive pose, breasts peeking out from where you have ridden up your shirt, before taking a quick picture. You attach the image and send.

Three little dots pop up on your screen as he types. They disappear after a moment. You wait. Once more, the dots reappear as you anticipate what could have his response so delayed.

But again, the dots stop.

Just as you begin to question if texting him a sexy photo was a terrible idea your cell rings with an incoming call. You slide the accept button and bring the device to your ear.

“If you were aroused, why didn’t you say so plainly?” comes his thick accent over the line.

You chuckle. “Laz, sweetie, what do you think the emojis were for?”

“It is an eggplant and a tongue,” he says matter-of-factly.

Your reply is matched. “Yes, exactly.” The line is quiet for a moment, but you can hear his breathing on the other end. Back to the task, you remind yourself. “Did you… did you like the-”

He cuts you off with a gruff “yes.” A beat passes. “You know I think you are exquisite. But it is past midnight, my dear. We both need to be up early tomorrow. We can discuss dinner and other matters then.” At his yawn you lose your courage to push the matter at hand for now. Next time I’ll get him, you think. With a hum you wish him a good night.

“I love you, Laszlo.”

“And I, you. Sleep well, my dear."

Tag list

@hardlyinteresting @lorna-d-m @livvyshmiv @somethingthatsaysbubbles @greeneyedblondie44 @unbeatablecurlgirl @apparrio @marchingicenotes7 @anteroom-of-death @bruhidaniel @lemairepstuff @thehuiabird @zemosimp05 @alindeluce @iamnotthecatladynextdoor @laura-naruto-fan1998 @trelaney @boneheadduluc @i-am-dead-inside-666 @fictionlandslanddreams @thatoneartgalsstuff @hb8301 @fandom-princess-forevermore @foggycandywitch @creme-bruhlee @andy-rocks

[ftcoye]

Hi I am Here to request Naruto being adopted by his extremely distant uncle Kisame bc that shit is still on my mind I am constantly Thinking about it. I just want to see them happy with family you know. You feel. You dig?

“Hey, Mister,” says Naruto, looking up with big blue eyes. “Are you a monster? Are you- Are you gonna eat me?” He looks absolutely delighted at the thought.

Kisame grins at that, all sharp teeth, which just makes the little boy light up even more. “Maybe. I dunno, do you taste good?”

Naruto scrunches up his face, thinking. “Dirty food tastes bad,” he says, with all the authority of someone who has definitely eaten dirty food he found on the ground. Not because he was starving or neglected or anything, but because he’s all of six years old and kids do stupid stuff like that. “And I… I haven’t had a bath in…” He counts on his fingers and holds up his hands – six fingers altogether. “This many days! So probably not.”

“Then I don’t think I’ll eat you,” Kisame says, and he finally crouches down so that he and the kid are roughly the same height. “You’re… Uzumaki Naruto, right?”

Naruto nods roughly, one, two, three four five times. “Yeah! Uzumaki Naruto! I’m gonna be the next Hokage, believe it!”

Kisame doesn’t really respond to that, hmming slightly, but his shark grin grows bigger. Naruto stares and looks about a moment away from reaching out to try to touch his teeth if he’s not distracted. “And Uzumaki Kushina’s your mom, right?”

Well, that’s certainly a distraction. Naruto’s eyes jerk away from his teeth to meet Kisame’s gaze, absolutely shocked. “You- You know my mom?” he asks, his voice hushed and small. “Uzumaki Kushina? That- That’s her name?”

There’s a moment when Kisame’s grin is a little- unkind, a little fixed in place, where a rumble of dark intent sweeps over both of them and Naruto kinda shivers unconsciously, before he reigns himself in. “Yeah. Met her, a few times.” He does not mention that most of those were on the battlefield. “We’re… distantly related. My old lady’s her third cousin or something.”

Naruto literally falls down, butt promptly in the dirt. “You- We’re family?” he gasps, tears welling up in his eyes, because that’s all he grasped from that. “That’s-“ Realization strikes him. “That’s why they call me a monster! Am I gonna look like you when I’m big?”

Kisame is both sad and happy for this kid, man. “Your mom didn’t,” he tells Naruto, cause he doesn’t like to lie. “But you can get sharp teeth like mine if you want, and we could change some other stuff. You could be a monster kinda like me, if you’d like.”

He bursts into tears and flings himself at Kisame.

The man hesitates for a moment, cause he really really doesn’t have experience with kids, before he wraps his arms around him in turn, squeezing him. That’s what his mom did when he was young, before she promptly kicked the bucket when he was young enough that it’s one of the few memories he has of her. “Hey, kid,” he says, finally deciding to ask the question that’s been bothering him. “Why are you out here?” He had kind of thought that when he came to see if he could kidnap the kid, it would, y’know, be a little more difficult than this, but the kid was almost on his way out the back entrance. Not exactly a place for a kid this age.

Naruto sniffles. “Old Man Hokage hasn’t… come in awhile,” he says. “I thought maybe if I went and hided then he’d come find me, but I think I hided really good cause he hasn’t found me yet.”

Kisame nods as if that makes perfect sense and doesn’t make him want to go and rip that old man’s head off. “Well. I found ya. You wanna come with me?”

He stares at him as if Kisame hung the moon and the stars. “Cause- Cause we’re family?” Kisame nods, and Naruto nods frantically as well. “Yes! Yes, I wanna be monsters with you! Does that make you Kisame-nii? Stupid Sasuke has a really cool older brother but you’re even COOLER so-“

“I’m definitely cooler,” Kisame says, grinning sharply and Naruto can’t resist the urge now that he’s in Kisame’s arms to reach out and poke his teeth. Kisame opens his mouth just slightly to gently, gently bite down on the finger, and gives it a lick as Naruto shrieks, pulling back his hand. “You’re right,” Kisame says, “You don’t taste good.”

Naruto laughs, bright and happy, and Kisame grins. Maybe he won’t be so bad at this.

[wing-ed-thing]

Click (Part V: Naruto)

Synopsis: You invited everyone out to dinner. You also audibly clicked. People have opinions about this.

Word Count: 1,927

Warnings/Tags: LANGUAGE, Slight Angst, Serious Themes

Part I: Shikamaru, Part II: Shino, Part III: Neji, Part IV: Rock Lee , Part V: Naruto, Part VI: Kiba, FINALE, The Message in Click

Notes: So for most of the Click series, you could have read as one shots, this one really relies on the other chapters. You’re not really going to know what’s going on so I suggest reading the Shikamaru, Shino, Neji, and Rock Lee parts that are already posted. At the very least read the Shikamaru one, but whatevs. 

This one is a bit more serious compared to the last chapter which was filled with jokes. But I think this might be the most important one because it’s so serious. 

Lee left. Naruto stared blankly at the spot Lee stood, lost in thought and pensive. He could almost still see his green form standing in front of him. The mental outline danced in the empty space. Sakura shifted next to Naruto, but he found himself too lost to notice. It felt as if his mind went blank yet his thoughts raced rapidly. Naruto, always one to feel the need to align himself correctly, felt like a failure. He clenched his fist. The three friends that they had traveled with moved on, but Sakura stayed. She put a tentative hand on his shoulder. Naruto shrugged her hand away.

“Naruto,” She spoke softly. “We’ll make it up to her, okay? Don’t beat yourself up.” Naruto shook his head, feeling himself begin to get more upset. He knew how you felt. He always prided himself in his ability to empathize with others. Never did Naruto believe that anyone should ever be alone, but he obviously messed up.

“I’m sorry, Sakura. I gotta go.” Sakura called after him as he left, but didn’t chase after him.

Naruto didn’t know where he was headed, he just felt his legs work under him. His hand made its way up to his hair and he tugged at the short strands. A frustrated grunt fell from his lips. The scenery around him changed rapidly as he picked up speed. It wasn’t like Naruto to ignore someone like he did. He remembered. He remembered you asking him to dinner clearly when he thought about it. It must have slipped his mind. He must have been distracted, too easily excited. It wasn’t as if he disliked you, not in the slightest. But now all he felt was guilt and most of all like a hypocrite.

Naruto let out a frustrated roar, stopping at the edge of a clearing to land a vicious strike against the trunk of a nearby tree. It shook, almost snapping. Leaves fell violently from the branches above.

“FUCK!” A loud string of curses came from the clearing. Naruto turned to see Shikamaru sitting up among the flowers. Shikamaru buried his face in his hand. “Fucking shit, thanks for scaring the absolute living shit out of me. Leave it to the hyperactive, knucklehead ninja to ruin my fucking nap.” His arms straightened out towards Naruto who stared in surprise. Shikamaru groaned before collapsing back down onto the ground, body sprawled out among the wild plantlife. Naruto wandered over.

“Sorry, Shikamaru,” Naruto apologized, hand once again in his hair. He scratched at the back of his head. “Maybe you should find a better spot to nap next time.” Shikamaru didn’t bat an eye as he looked upward at the clear sky.

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, Naruto, but we’re in the middle of fucking nowhere.” Only then did Naruto’s attention snap up. He glanced around, turning his body a full three-hundred and sixty degrees. Shikamaru was right, they were in the middle of nowhere and Naruto had hardly noticed. He didn’t even think that they were within the limits of Konoha anymore. Shikamaru looked at Naruto quickly, then back to the sky. “Are you leaving now?” But the blond said nothing, instead coming to sit down next to Shikamaru, who frowned.  

“I think I messed up, Shikamaru.” Naruto mumbled, pulling his legs closer to cross them. The Nara let out a sigh. Apparently, Naruto planned to stay.

“Is this about the birthday thing?” Shikamaru asked, causing Naruto to scrunch his face in shock.

“Yeah, how’d you know?”

“You’re not the first person to get worked up about it and something tells me you won’t be the last,” Shikamaru huffed. The wind blew, causing the tall grass to waver in the breeze. Naruto’s hair flew into his face, causing him to shift. The strands blew over his forehead. “Beating yourself up over it isn’t going to fix anything.”

“Well, what will?” Shikamaru remained silent. He kept his eyes on the sky above. Naruto looked up too, wondering what it was that Shikamaru was so fixated with. “Think I should talk to her?” Shikamaru didn’t skip a beat.

“Would you be talking to her for you or for her?” Naruto glanced back at Shikamaru.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, are you talking to her to make her feel better or to make yourself feel better?” The blond frowned.

“Her, of course.” He answered with a certain amount of certainty. In all honesty, he didn’t put that much thought into the question. Like most instances in Naruto’s life, he just answered, leaving the heavy thinking for a later time. He stood and Shikamaru hummed. “Thanks for the advice. I’ll let you know how it goes.”

“Please don’t.” But Naruto was already gone.

***

Lee had almost finished the dishes by the time a knock came at your door. You had offered, planned on doing them yourself, but Lee insisted. When Lee insisted, there was no convincing him otherwise so he stood over your sink, scrubbing with rigor you had never seen before. You opened the door to reveal Naruto, his eyes near pleading. You stepped to the side, letting him in straight away. A pit of dread gathered up in your stomach. You did not click. Lee looked up from his work. He seemed to sense that something was wrong as well.

“Oh, Naruto.” But his surprised greeting was ignored. Naruto’s eyes focused solely on you.

“Can we talk?” He asked in a hushed tone. Your eyes glazed quickly over your apartment. No room to talk in private.

“Um, yeah sure.” You gave a slight smile. Your voice jumped an octave, pumped with kind understanding. You faced Lee, who looked at you with expectation. “You can leave those. It was really nice having you over tonight. I really love the flowers.” A polite and silent request for him to leave. Lee understood, but appeared wary.

“Is there anything you would like me to do?” You shook your head.

“Thank you for keeping me company and for being so understanding. I hope we can do this again soon.” Lee gave you a hopeful grin.

“Yes, I would very much enjoy that.” He left through the window. Naruto found his way to your empty kitchen table. He seemed lost in the pattern of the hard, wood surface. You sat down across from him.

“Can I get you some tea?”

Naruto shook his head slowly, continuing to stare down at your table. You sat patiently, waiting for him to speak. You could tell that he had something to say, but you refrained from prying. Your fingers traced the outline of your clicker in your pocket. And after letting the tension in the air thicken just a moment longer, Naruto finally spoke.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know.” He paused. Your lips remained sealed. You sat, ready to listen. Naruto looked up at you, seeming to wonder if you’d answer, but he took your silence as a cue to continue. “About your birthday, I mean. It was Kiba, he was the one who convinced us all to go out and it must’ve slipped my mind. I just feel like a jerk for listening to him and blowing you off like that. I just realized that those guys are really mean to you and I swear I’ll never be like that.” Naruto’s bright, baby-blue eyes met yours.

“Naruto,” You spoke his name softly. You almost bowed your head, afraid to tell him what you were going to. A gulp. “You apologize, but you blame everything… on Kiba. Kiba convinced you. You shouldn’t have listened to Kiba. Those guys did and said something unkind.” He stared blankly at you.

“Kiba was the one who set the whole thing up. It’s his fault. And I thought you should know about all the mean things people are saying about you. It just made my blood boil-”

“Naruto.” His name cut through the atmosphere. “No matter what the intention was, you told me that you’d be there. I don’t care what Kiba did-”

“But you don’t know what he-”

“But you. I was under the impression that since you apologized, this conversation was about you.” There was a force in your tone that Naruto had never heard before. He looked across the table at you sitting neatly in your chair. Your face remained unreadable, though kind. A certain amount of strength radiated from you. “I know what Kiba did and I know what people say about me. They’ve acted that way and said the same things for quite some time now.”

You sighed and leaned back in your chair. Naruto, for once, was still. You continued, speaking quicker. Nervous, but determined to make a point.

“But all of that aside, if we’re talking about what happened yesterday between you and I, all I can see is that you told me you’d join me for dinner, but you never came. And honestly, I was upset at that moment, but I’m really not as down about it as everyone seems to think I am.” You let out a deep exhale, having built it up as you spoke. Naruto clenched his fists underneath the table.

“Yes, you are. How can you not be upset about that? How can you not care, just not care about what happened?”

“You want a real answer, here, Naruto?” You sighed and once again made eye contact with the blond. “I’m not upset, because the actions of others are not things I can control.” You crossed your arms and leaned forward.

“But something should change,” Naruto argued. “I feel guilty. They should at least feel guilty and say sorry for fucking up so bad.”

“And maybe something should change.” You shrugged, letting your head tilt to the side. “But I’m not going to work myself up over something that I can’t control.” You smiled, letting yourself laugh just a little bit. You spoke his name with affection. “Not everyone has to like me. It was really hard, I won’t lie because who doesn’t want to be liked? But sometimes there are people who just don’t understand you and really, it’s not my job to make them understand. I’m living in a way that makes me happy. And anyone who wants to join me is welcome to.”

Nartuo once again fell silent. Once again, you allotted him time to think.

“I’d understand if you wanted space or to not be friends.” Naruto nodded to himself, mustering up the strength to look you in the eye. “But if you’d let me, I’d like to join you, even if no one else will.”

“You are forgiven if that’s what you need to hear.” You let out a snicker and he mirrored your expression, albeit sheepishly.

“I appreciate that, actually.” You rattled and a small click came from your pocket.

“I try to focus on the positives as best I can. Maybe they’ll see, like you said, and learn.” You looked to your left out through the window. You shrugged, returning back to Naruto. “Maybe not. It’s not my problem and it certainly won’t keep me up at night. There’s no use in looking back. For me, the only option is forward.” You felt the ache of that slight smile that had plastered itself to your lips. “That’s it for my depressing monologue for tonight.”

“Not at all,” Naruto reassured you, but you had retired the subject. You stood.

“I’m going to make some tea. Do you want some?”

“Yes, please.” Naruto nodded politely, energy dipping from the less-than-chipper conversation.

Notes: I meant every word of this. It takes time and a whole lot of effort to change your mindset about something, but you really can set yourself free. If you’re expecting everyone to adore you, you’re setting yourself up for failure. Sometimes hardship reveals who your true friends are. I’d take that any day over a group of people who silently judge me. 

Note: Let. Shikamaru. Say. Fuck. 

Thank you to everyone who liked, reblogged, and followed. Your support means so much and is greatly appreciated.

[kishillaa]

SSM21 Day 29: Weakness

It was late in the evening when Sasuke and Sakura arrived at a promising shelter–a cave.

"We can stay here for the night." Sasuke spoke as he stop at the mouth of the cave, inspecting their location. Sakura was right behind him carrying their newborn, Sarada.

"Alright, Sarada need to be feed anyway." Sakura said, softly pokinh the sleeping baby's cheek with her finger.

Sasuke walk closer to them as he too, mesmerised by their very own daughter sleeping soundly in Sakura's arm while pacing side by side into the cave, "How often do we need to feed her?"

"Often." Sakura replies, content that her husband is really interested in knowing their child needs. He's been asking almost non-stop–which is so unlike Sasuke–about baby and what he needs to know.

"A newborn like her need to be fed every 2 or 3 hours, about 8 to 12 times a day." She continues, while watch Sasuke gather some woods and place it in the middle of the cave.

Her husband turns his head to her, "That much?"

"They don't drink a lot. Only a few ounces every time." She acquired, smiling softly at him.

The squirming in Sakura's cradle attracted both of the new parents. Sasuke quickly light up the fire before he moves towards Sakura, settled on beside her.

He watch in captive as his daughter's small mouth open and close up on his wife's breast as she offers it lightly on her lips. He didn't realised his hand reaching up to her, and stroke her puffing cheek with the back of his forefinger, enjoying the softness of her skin.

"She's adorable, isn't she, Sasuke-kun?" Sasuke nodded, not leaving his gaze from Sarada.

Soon, she was done feeding, and Sakura was burping her when, she said, "Sasuke-kun, can you look after her for a while? I'll prepare the fish you caught earlier for dinner."

"I can do the fish. You sit down with Sarada."

Sakura giggles, "Are you avoiding your daughter, anata? You haven't hold her since we left Karin-san's place yesterday."

"I am not. I just don't want you to tire yourself. I'll do other work, while you're with Sarada."

Sakura scoff and hand him their baby which Sasuke almost clumsily caught with his one arm, not even a slightest ready for her act.

"I want to cook. You hold our daughter." His wife commanded and lift herself up to prepare for dinner.

Sasuke sighs at his wife retreating figure before look down at Sarada in his lap. The little girl's eyes are open a little too wide, and blinking as she stares at him–as if she could see yet, Sasuke thought remembering how Sakura said she couldn't be focusing her sight clearly until at least she is 8 weeks old. Sarada is only 2 weeks and 5 days at the moment.

Sasuke lift his hand that cradle Sarada and lower his head to sniff on her, like he often see Sakura does, and he was greeted by a soft baby scent. He likes it, and so he does it again, and again until Sarada was squirming at him, hands flailing over his face as though telling him to stop what he's doing.

He snorted then and lay her back down in his lap.

She's going to be the death of me, he thought.

An addition to the list of things he needs to protect; his mind tell him as he watch fondly at Sarada who is rubbing her face with her hands Sakura wrapped with hand socks.

"You're giving me the strength to keep on fighting for you, and the village," he speaks in his hushed voice using that tone he heard Sakura use while speaking to their daughter and turn to look at the said wife of his who is already looking his way, "and your mother," he continues.

-

When Sakura enters their home exclaiming, "I'm home," that had not been responded to, she did not expect to see her husband sprawled down on his chest on their couch with their 2 and a half year old daughter sitting on top of his back attempting to do his hair.

Sakura laughs, "Sara-chan." She calls out.

"What are you doing with Papa?"

"Oh, Mama!" The girl squeals and moves away from her father's back, almost trip on her own leg before ran up to her mother, hugging her leg shouting a loud screeching, "Welcome home!"

Sakura chuckles as she lowers herself down and lift Sarada up, "You've been good today?"

"Yes!" She cheered, and turn to her father.

"Sarada ties Papa's hair!" Her cute soft voice erupted throughout the Uchiha's household.

Sakura can't help but let out another laugh when she sees Sasuke's red ears and messy raven locks, change his position to sit on the couch, "And Sarada thought it would be good to sit on Papa's back while doing so?"

Sarada nodded vigorously, "Papa is so tall and Sarada cannot reach his hair."

The pink haired Uchiha matriarch walk over to her husband and sit beside him, chuckling lightly at her husband and daughter cute behaviour.

"Welcome home." Sasuke mumbles while trying to pat his hair in attempt to smooth down the mess Sarada made.

"Papa!" Sarada scolded.

"Don't do that. Don't do that." She said moving away from her mother and sit herself on Sasuke's lap. She moves the hair that cover the rinnegan, tucking it behind his ear.

"Better, right Mama?" Sarada turns to eye her mother, the look of hopeful adorned her face.

Amusement dance in Sakura's eyes as she nodded before wink teasingly at her husband.

Sasuke let out a defeat sigh as he let Sarada moves behind him because, "Sarada needs to fix Papa's hair."

"Don't pout, anata. It doesn't suit you." He heard his wife spoke before she leans down and place a chaste kiss over his lips.

"Your daughter is doing my hair." He spat in distaste, almost accusingly.

Sakura laughs again, "She's your daughter too."

"The only reason I let her be." He said, his only arm moves to snake her shoulder, dragging her closer to him.

"Seems like Sasuke Uchiha isn't as strong as it seems, huh? What would Naruto say if he sees you like this?" She said teasingly.

Sasuke rolls his eyes, "We would be out of the village, staying somewhere far away that none of them will find us."

Sakura laughed really hard at that. Her husband don't joke often, he do sarcastic remarks. And when he did, it will always be too funny that it hurt her stomach to laugh that hard.

"I once thought that Sarada is your strength, Sasuke-kun." She voice out.

"She is, Sakura." His eyes narrow at her, challenging her to continue what she was saying.

Sakura recognised that look and laugh again before saying, "Turn out, she's your weakness too, huh? Who knew Sasuke-kun would admit to a defeat, and let his hair tied."

Sasuke's eyes soften as he stares at his laughing wife before he winced when Sarada pulls his hair a little too hard, "Don't move, Papa."

And he had to admit, Sarada is indeed his weakness. The female in his life that he loves to no end, Sakura and Sarada are both his weakness and his strength, it almost feared him.

[kiljoius-writes]

Cooler Than Me - Chapter 2

Ao3 | FFN

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First Chapter

Chapter 2: Day One - Sasuke

Sasuke watches Shikamaru slide through the front entrance, then lets out one of those tired sighs.

He reaches forward to pull the report back up to his eyes, going over it seriously this time.

Noise complaint.

How did he end up here?

It’s a question he asks himself often.

The answer is always the same. He’s not the heir to his clan, so his duty was to the village and his clan. And the way their clan protects the village is by occupying the entirety of the police force.

Did it seem corrupt to have an entire police department run by one clan? Sure, and Sasuke’s brought that up multiple times. It’s never mattered, though, so here Sasuke is.

A desk jockey.

Sure, he had been on track to head the department. Until Naruto roped him into one of his crazed gambling schemes—he didn’t know the area they were operating in had outlawed gambling. The Mist never seemed like the type to shy away from entertainment, how were they supposed to know gambling was illegal there? Sasuke didn’t care to gamble, he only cared to keep his friend out of trouble. And even then, he had trouble caring, he only went to the Mist with Naruto at Hinata’s behest to do just that.

So, when the Mizukage released them and kicked their asses back to the Leaf, Sasuke found himself behind a desk.

For months.

Smoke enters his nostrils.

“Shit!” he gasps, dropping the report he had unknowingly been sending an electrical charge to. He slams his hand over the small flame and groans. Eyes that matched his all turn to him simultaneously and he scowls at each of them. “Back to work!”

He may have been a desk jockey, but he still holds a modicum of respect for his name. The other Uchiha turn around and busy themselves as he slumps back into his seat. He brings a hand up to rub at his forehead, then looks up at the sound of a child squealing.

Ah, yes. The only thing that made this whole thing bearable.

When he got put on desk duty, he kicked the schmuck who occupied this seat out of it for the sole purpose of having the best view of the academy.

The kids he could give a damn about. Snot-nosed brats didn’t interest him. No, it was their fair, dark-haired sensei he was interested in. The one who readily accepted a hug, high five, or wave from each one as they shuffled away. She always left it up to them how they would say farewell, and most opted for a generous hug.

Sasuke liked to complain that she smelled like cheese dust and grass after she got off work.

Hinata knew he was never actually annoyed, though.

So when the last child skitters off, he smirks when her head turns to face his window. Twelve on the dot.

Her form disappears and he immediately snaps his head to face the entrance, finding her already sliding her way in. He pushes all of his paperwork to the side of his desk as she saunters up, then casually plops herself atop.

“Hinata-sensei,” he greets her, resting his clasped hands on his stomach as she leans over.

“Officer Uchiha,” she returns, placing a kiss on his forehead. He tries to control his lips from turning into more than a teasing smile. “I saw Shikamaru. Another noise complaint?”

“Indeed,” he sighs, reaching out to tap it, “another from the Hyūga compound. You need to tell your sister her parties are getting too wild.”

“Oh, I do?” she asks teasingly. “Shouldn’t our local police be the ones to scold her?”

“You don’t want me to.” He frowns, eyelids hanging low. She smiles and he thinks the way it makes his heart flutter is uncomfortable in the best way. “Shikamaru arrives with a report, you arrive with nothing. Is there no respect for the Uchiha in this village anymore?”

“Sorry,” she offers, earnestly and he chuckles, “I didn’t have time to pack us anything today.”

Sasuke tuts and Hinata giggles. “Airhead.”

She whispers, “I’m not the one who got caught gambling in the Mist.”

“Hush, woman,” he grunts, squinting up at her.

Her smile returns and she throws her hair over her shoulder. How she’s so effortlessly captivating, he’s unsure, especially when all of the other Hyūga look so terribly dull. “Besides, you’ll be at Ichiraku’s in…” She pulls up her wrist to check her watch. “Twenty minutes, won’t you? It’s Tuesday.”

“That’s why I’m disappointed,” he responds, “because now I’ll have to eat there and the idiot’s going to leave me to pay.”

“He’s your friend,” she points out, resting her weight on her hand, “you can treat him to lunch sometimes.”

“Once is never enough.” He shakes his head.

That giggle. “You can’t resist him.”

“I think that’s you,” he says, irritably, though he doesn’t mean it. “Maybe I can do a demonstration or something for your next group. Kids like fireballs, right?”

“Of course they do,” she deadpans, blinking down at him, “but not today. Don’t try to weasel your way out of lunch with your best friend, Officer Uchiha. It’s not professional.”

“You’re mean to me,” he pouts, looking away. She leans down and her lips are on his cheek this time and he curses himself inwardly, knowing the contact is creating a blush without his permission.

The heart is a rude thing. Doesn’t listen to the brain.

“You weasel your way out of things all the time.” He reaches out for her hand and she lets him take it and guide her around the desk to pull her into his lap. Satisfaction hits him when her face goes pink now, too, as she looks around the office. No one cares, but it’s not very professional, he’ll admit. “Like your sex ed lessons.”

“Sasuke!” she hisses, quietly, pressing a finger to his lips. He opens his mouth to bite at it and she snatches it away, now with a glare on her face. “Quit that!”

“Remember,” he continues, “pinch the tip of the condom before putting it on the cucumber—”

“Enough!” she gasps out, her full hand muffling his mouth now.

He pulls away her hand, mischief in his eyes. “Sorry, the penis—”

“Alrighty!” Hinata shoots to her feet, out of his grasp, already starting to walk away.

Sasuke laughs, hurriedly grabbing his wallet and keys before jogging after her. He grabs her shoulder before she can get too far and he wraps his arms around her. She huffs irritably into his chest, but her arms still circle his torso despite it because she can’t resist him. He’s kind today and doesn’t point that out. “I’ll see you after work, sensei.”

“Hmmm,” she hums against him, rubbing her nose back and forth over his sternum. “If you’d still like to get out of lunch with Naruto, I suppose I do have a demonstration you could do…”

“Nope.” He releases her and she lets out a little whine. “Not teaching sex ed to your brats.”

“Awful,” she huffs, crossing her arms as he drops a kiss on the top of her head. He smirks down at her as he pats her cheek. She sighs a bit dramatically and tilts her head up, letting him place a kiss on her lips. “See you soon.”

Sasuke watches her turn and walk away and lets his gaze linger until her form disappears.

He’s not corny like other guys, but he will admit it: he hates to see her go, but loves to watch her leave.

He begins his trek to Ichiraku’s.

He looks in disdain as two teenagers fly by him, launching kunai at one another. Swiftly, he catches one in the air, and launches it straight at the offending teen. Almost straight at them—about a centimeter away from grazing their tender little face. It sinks into the wooden fencing behind them. They both gasp and stop, whirling around to find him with that signature glare.

“In front of a police officer? Really?” he scoffs, resting a hand on his hip.

Immediately, both fall into a deep bow. “We’re so sorry, Officer Uchiha!”

“Hand ‘em over.” He holds out an idle hand, awaiting payment. Both teens straighten out and fish out their weapons with low grumbles of irritancy, begrudgingly depositing them into the waiting hand. Quickly, he tucks them away in a satchel and holds the last one up in front of their faces. “Send your parents to pick these up later.”

“Yes, sir…”

Sasuke smirks as the two turn away, defeated. He turns, too, then has to stop himself from further reprimanding them when he hears them call him a grumpy old man. He shuts his eyes and pulls back to Hinata’s kind face telling him:

“In through the mouth, out through the nose. Happy place. With me.”

Yes. Happy place.

Sasuke’s happy place is in the forest, preferably with a flute in hand and Hinata’s lovely manner adoring him as he plays.

When he opens his eyes and finds this wretched village in front of him, he lets out a sigh.

Calm.

Of course, when he arrives at Ichiraku’s, he’s wholly unsurprised to find his blond, idiot best friend already halfway through his second bowl.

“Hey there, Sasuke,” Teuchi greets him and he nods, “anything besides tea today?”

“Yeah,” Sasuke sighs, pulling himself into the seat next to Naruto, who gives him a sloppy, mouth-full-of-food greeting that makes him cringe away. “Just a miso.”

“’Sup man,” Naruto gargles out and Sasuke rolls his eyes.

“Not paying,” Sasuke clarifies immediately, settling on his elbows. “You’re working right now, aren’t you?”

“Ah.” Naruto glugs down some water before slamming it back on the counter, then nods. “Got ten minutes ‘til I’m back on the clock.”

“Perfect,” Sasuke responds, honestly. Naruto laughs.

“Any interesting cases this week?” Naruto questions before shoveling more noodles into his maw.

Sasuke clicks his tongue, accepting tea from Ayame. “Noise complaint from Hanabi’s side of the compound last night.”

“Oh shit, yeah,” Naruto coughs out and Sasuke has to stop himself from hitting him upside the head. If he has to give him the Heimlich one more time, he’ll send his Chidori right through his far too large heart (from calcification). “Konohamaru was hungover to shit this morning. Had fun landing hits to his head.”

For this, Sasuke chuckles. Other's pain is always funny.

“How’s Hinata?” Naruto asks just as a bowl of miso soup is set before Sasuke. Naruto lifts his bowl to slurp.

Sasuke takes a moment to bring the bowl to his mouth to blow over it. He sucks in his cheek and rests his eyes on Naruto. “Fine. The usual.”

“Oh! It’s February!” Naruto perks up, a grin spreading across his face. “Ohohoho, you know what that means,” he continues, laughter in his voice, “sex ed!”

“Idiot,” Sasuke scoffs, sipping from the bowl, “its proper name is health education.”

“Oh yeah, all about health,” Naruto snorts, slamming the bowl down, causing everything to titter around them. “Learn about all the essentials, right? Brain, heart, genitals—”

“I’m surprised you even know that word,” Sasuke snarks, then takes a long drink of the soup.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. You tell her to remember to pinch the tip of the condom?” Naruto grins, pushing his cheek into his palm as he rests his elbow on the counter.

Sasuke rolls his eyes. He’ll never admit to having stolen that line from Naruto. To Naruto, or Hinata.

“Tenten.”

They both look up when Ayame greets the next person walking in, or more skipping, bubbly and delightful as ever.

Sasuke scowls and Tenten beams. “Hey all!”

“Hey hey!” Naruto gives a big wave as she makes her way to the counter, a bag ready for her. Sasuke glares at her.

Is there any reason for him to? No. He just won’t be bewitched like Naruto.

“Right, it’s Tuesday, isn’t it?” Tenten laughs as light clinking comes from her fingertips, cash deposited for the ramen.

“Aww, you got me one? Coulda just asked me out on a date directly, y’know.”

Sasuke thinks the way Naruto flirts is pathetic. So does everyone else. The kid can’t catch a break when it comes to women—or winning a bet. It’s probably related somehow. Tsunade messed him up for the worse.

“You wish,” Tenten teases lightheartedly. “You still haven’t gotten me back for the ramen I got you last week.”

“Oh, right…”

“Yes,” Sasuke interjects, a part of the conversation he feels justified in getting in on, “and you haven’t paid me back for your laundry a few days ago.”

“Come to think of it,” Tenten continues, tapping her chin, “he never paid you back for paying bail from the Mist, did he?”

Sasuke hadn’t forgotten. He casts his glare Naruto’s way, who is quickly shrinking away.

“Sasuke, buddy—” Naruto puts his hands up in defense as Sasuke rises to his feet, sharingan spinning.

[catflorist]

Warm (ao3/ffn) catflorist written for the beginnings with sasusaku zine 

Falling snow made Konoha quiet, but this corner of the village was always quiet. Sasuke exited the Uchiha compound with a travel pack hanging heavy on his shoulder. On this evening, with hours until the beginning of the new year, the emptiness of his clan’s district gnawed at him more than usual.

In a different life, he would be fire-jumping with his clan.

Before the new year, the Uchiha clan gathered and lit fires in the streets. They jumped together over the flames. With each leap, the fire fed on their sickness, weakness, and bad luck. It offered health and good luck in return.

Sasuke was not an animated child, but during this ceremony, he would jump high and wild like the others. There was a sense of invulnerability when arriving on the other side of the flame unscathed, then a burning drive to leap again. His feet were loud on the ground when he landed, because he didn't know yet how to move like a shinobi. Every year, he swore he would jump as high as Itachi, though he never could.

No fires were burning in the Uchiha district now, and no children were leaping. The gates to the compound creaked as Sasuke pulled them shut. He slipped into the tangle of Konoha’s winding streets.

Halfway to his apartment, pink hair flashed in the beam of a street lamp. Sakura turned the corner, arms crowded with grocery bags, and strode towards the crosswalk. 

Sasuke halted. She hadn’t spotted him yet. 

“Sakura ka…” he called. He could not say hello when he greeted her, only, Ah, it’s Sakura, like she was a phenomenon to remark upon.

Sakura turned her head. 

“Sasuke-kun,” she replied, eyes brightening. As her gaze flicked to the bag over his shoulder, her smile faltered. “Are you going again?”

Sasuke frowned, pulling on the strap of the offending bag. He had only recently returned to the village. Did she think he was leaving so soon? 

“I was visiting...” He turned his head in the direction of the old Uchiha district. “Gathering some things.”

“I see,” she murmured. “Then...do you have plans this evening? I’m going to make toshikoshi soba.” She shifted an arm, revealing the green onions and package of soba noodles peeking out of one grocery bag. “It’ll be too much for one person.” Her cheeks were pink, but maybe it was the cold. 

Sasuke usually preferred to be alone. Since returning to the village in the fall, he had his routine. It was not very different from his routine while traveling. In the mornings he trained. He cooked meals in silence and gazed at the view of the forest. In the evenings he tried not to sleep too deeply, his protocol to stave off the nightmares.

The only difference was that if Naruto pounded on the door enough, he might be convinced to spar. If Sakura was around, she healed his injuries. “Try to be more careful next time,” she would say with a crinkle between her eyebrows, which is what happened when she wanted to say more, but didn't want to push him.

She wore that same look now, gripping her bags tighter in case he said yes, eyes already down in case he refused. Snowflakes rested and melted on her eyelashes.

After sorting through his father and Itachi’s belongings, on a night when the compound should have been alive with fire, being alone wasn’t as appealing as usual.

“All right,” he heard himself saying.

.

.

Sakura had barely seen Sasuke since he had returned to the village. Now he was seated in her kitchen, tasting the toshikoshi soba she had made following her mother’s recipe. If she wanted, she could bump her knee against his under her small table.

“Your apartment...” Sasuke began. His voice was quiet, the same timbre as the hum of her radiator. 

“I don’t spend a lot of time here,” she interjected, palms itching. Her apartment was small and unadorned. She had cobbled furniture together courtesy of her parents, Ino, and a spare office in the Hokage tower. Half the time, she sneezed when she walked in the door, because she never found a moment to sweep the dust.

Sasuke’s shoulder rose and fell. “No, it’s not that.” He raised the bowl to his lips, taking a long sip. “It looks like it’s yours.”

Before she could wonder how he concluded this, Sasuke lowered the bowl to the table, a little too gently. Something about the movement told Sakura to pay attention.

“I was gathering clothes. Mine are worn from traveling.” He swirled noodles slowly in his broth. “I don’t have another way to wear our crest. What I found wasn’t in great condition.”

Sakura would never fully grasp the lonely responsibilities Sasuke bore as the last of his clan. If he did not wear the crest, there was no one else who would. He had to choose, every day, to be an Uchiha. Otherwise they would disappear. 

“If you need…” Sakura swallowed. “I can help. I know how to sew.” 

The sink dripped, once, twice. Sakura’s mouth opened, an apology bubbling to her lips, when Sasuke left the kitchen. He returned to his chair and spread the contents of his bag on the table: carefully folded articles of clothing, uchiwa fans decorating each item.

Sakura stroked a loose thread, where the fabric of the Uchiha crest was lifting away from the back of a dark haori. “They're not in bad condition,” she said. “They just need some attention.” 

“This was my father’s,” Sasuke said, fingertips grazing a deep blue yukata. He nodded towards the article in Sakura’s hands. “Itachi’s.”

Sakura touched her knee to Sasuke’s, soft enough to pass as an accident. He could easily move away, if he wanted to. He didn’t.

“There was a certain stitch we used to sew on crests,” he said. “But I was young. I never learned.” 

Sakura inspected the stitching pattern on the haori. It was not too different from a surgical stitch she knew. She unearthed her sewing materials from a kitchen drawer and started the careful work of re-attaching the crest.

When the task was done, Sakura lifted her head. Sasuke’s chair was empty, and the table was clear of dishes.

“Sasuke-kun?” she called. 

A soft grunt sounded from behind. Sasuke was leaning over the counter, next to a clean sink and a neat stack of dishes. He set aside a bottle of oil.

She frowned. “What are you doing?” 

Sasuke turned, gripping her old cast iron skillet. Its surface appeared to possess more luster, and less rust, than usual. 

“Your cast iron was rusting,” he said in disapproval. “I’m re-seasoning it.” He lit the oven and placed the pan inside with a clank. “It’ll need an hour.”

“You’ve made yourself at home,” Sakura said.

A faint smile raised the corners of Sasuke’s lips.

Sakura smoothed over the mended crest of Itachi’s haori. “How is this?”

Sasuke reclaimed his seat and leaned in. Their shoulders brushed. After a beat, he nodded. “Good.”

Sakura’s cheeks warmed, unexpectedly. “Being a trained surgeon doesn’t hurt.” 

The smile returned, closer to a smirk this time. He discovered her kettle, brewed tea, and set two cups on the table. Outside the window, night deepened, approaching midnight. 

Sakura slipped back into concentration. Tomorrow she would start off the new year with an early shift at the hospital. Instead of going to bed, she added a yukata to her growing pile of mended clothing. Sasuke remained a quiet presence beside her, sipping tea, making no move to leave.

Maybe, she thought, looping thread through cloth, we’ll do this again. 

Sasuke peered at her face. “What are you thinking about?”

“Hm? Oh...nothing. Smells bad.” The scent of oil pushed past its smoking point was filling her kitchen. “What are you thinking about?”

“The new year,” he said, tracing the lip of his teacup. “Old traditions.”

“Traditions?” she prompted.

Sasuke stood and slid his left hand into an oven mitt. “My clan...we used to do fire-jumping before the new year.”

“That seems very beautiful,” Sakura said, voice hushed. “I know fire is important to your clan.”

“Yes, it is.” 

“Why is that?”

Sasuke removed the pan from the oven. A dark, glassy finish replaced rust and dullness, every imperfection transformed under the oven’s fire. His eyes lowered. “It’s cleansing.”

Sakura stared down at the image of the uchiwa, symbolically fanning the flames of the Uchiha clan. Halfway through a stitch, she had an idea.

.

.

Fire-jumping was an exchange of energy, mutual agreement between human and flame. Both the Uchiha and the flames entered the new year warmer and stronger than before. 

It was a long time since Sasuke had done anything resembling tradition. He had not even celebrated his birthday since first leaving the village, out of the habit of prioritizing his quest for revenge over himself. Tradition was hard when only one person remained to keep it fed. And there was so much he didn’t know, that he had never thought to ask.

He wondered if he could manage to explain this to Sakura. 

Sakura’s eyes were fierce. She finished a stitch, barely looking, and disappeared into her bedroom.

The scent of lavender filled the air. Sakura paused in the hallway with a lit candle. 

“You can do it here, if you want,” she said, holding out the flame like an offering.

.

.

“Why aren’t you jumping, nii-san?” Sasuke asked, tugging once on Itachi’s sleeve. 

The streets were crowded tonight, loud with chatter, music, and crackling flames. The main avenue of the Uchiha district was dotted with fires every few paces, so people could jump down the length of the entire street. Sasuke’s chest was swelling with pride. This year, he had used his ever-strengthening katon to help otou-san light the fires.

Itachi crouched to Sasuke’s eye level. His face was softer than normal in the starlight and the warmth of the flames. “Maybe later,” he said, with a small smile, and a customary two-fingered tap.

As Sasuke frowned in disappointment, Itachi peered down an unlit alley. “I don’t know if the fire will help this year. I might have too much for it to take away.”

His brother’s statement was odd––casual, yet tinged with something Sasuke couldn’t understand. But the strangeness slipped from his mind once he rejoined the rest of his clan, the excitement of the ceremony taking hold of again.

Sasuke spent the next new year alone.

.

.

Sasuke was fourteen, footsteps echoing through the corridors of Orochimaru’s lair. Time had little meaning this deep in the earth, but reading the dates on Kabuto’s newest specimens had recalibrated him. The new year was days away.

Dim torches lined the walls. The fire beckoned him. Sasuke reached out a hand, considering. 

Itachi’s strange words, uttered a lifetime ago, rang in his mind. Sasuke understood what he meant, all of a sudden. The fire promised to cleanse him, to take the hurt away. But like Itachi, he was carrying too much.

He turned his back to the flickering torchlight and slunk into the cold dim of his chamber.

.

.

The day Sasuke returned to Konoha, the forest was under autumn’s spell. Between mossy tree trunks and golden leaves, he caught his first glimpse of the village, bright beneath departing clouds. 

“Okaeri!” Naruto shouted, a speck in the distance bounding through Konoha’s wide gates. Beside him, Kakashi raised a hand in greeting.

Sasuke crossed the treeline, and the steps of his journey quietly ran out. He halted before his old mentor and teammate, the village walls high over his head.

“Taidama,” he said. “What day is it?”

“The equinox,” Kakashi answered. 

Sasuke’s gaze swept across his surroundings. The village streets were damp with afternoon rain. Wet leaves clumped together beneath his sandals. No one else was waiting for him. 

Kakashi and Naruto exchanged a look.

“Sakura’s in the middle of surgery,” Naruto said.

“Hm,” Sasuke replied. 

It was a short walk to his old townhouse apartment. Kakashi presented him the key he had safeguarded, Naruto ordered him to come to dinner later that week, and then he was alone on the stoop. A stray cat emerged from beneath the stairs, interested in Sasuke’s appearance.

Sasuke palmed the key in his hand, facing the door. He was not sure what he would find in the apartment he had vacated when he was thirteen. Did he make the bed before he left? Would he find his old clothes still folded in the drawers?

There was a blur in the air like falling blossoms. Sakura was standing on the sidewalk, mouth parted, exhaling a deep breath. Her boots were splattered with mud and what looked like blood. She wore a sweater thrown on top of scrubs, a crumpled surgery cap in her fist.

“Sakura ka,” he said.

She straightened. “Okaeri, Sasuke-kun.”

He had wondered what it would be like to look at her again. Now he learned it was the same. The exact same.

.

.

Sasuke was seated in Sakura’s kitchen, his eyes unfocused. He saw a clan, together, jumping over fire to bring in the new year. His clan was gone, yet he was warm, and alive, and Sakura was looking at him over the candle’s fire.

He must have been silent for too long, because Sakura’s hand drifted down. “I’m sorry,” she said, voice wavering. “I know it’s not the same––it’s nothing at all how it should be…”

Sasuke rose to his feet and caught her hand. “It will work fine.”

It was not the same. But a flame was a flame. It promised to take his bad luck away, if he so allowed.

Sakura set the candle on the ground, casting the walls of her narrow hallway in a whirl of light and shadow. 

Sasuke closed his eyes and leapt. He leapt again, over and over Sakura’s small candle. Light footed, he didn't make a sound. 

When he opened his eyes, Sakura was leaning against the wall, head bowed. 

“Sakura. Your turn.”

Sakura’s brow furrowed. “It’s not my tradition.”

“I want you to,” he said, moving aside to create space.

Sakura took a breath, preparing herself. She bounded over the candle, twirling and twisting freely in the air. Watching her, Sasuke turned over a thought in his mind that he no longer wanted to ignore. 

With a final leap, she landed close to him. She leaned up on her toes, balanced perfectly between standing and falling, eyes shining from the joy of the movement. Sasuke steadied her elbow, even though she didn't need him to. It was a reflex, like dragging up a blanket in the middle of a cold night, or sighing after drinking water. He could not help but catch her.

It was not the same. There was the scent of lavender, a pile of clothing with freshly sewn Uchiha crests, and somehow, Sakura’s fingers wound together with his.

“You’re an Uchiha now,” he told her. Perhaps it was too blunt to say it this way, but it was true. Anyone who fire-jumped was an Uchiha. If he was the last, then he could shape his traditions, and choose who to do them with.

Besides, they always knew each other well. They only needed some time to know each other well again.

Sakura squeezed his hand, her calloused palm pressed to his. “We can do this again next year. Whatever you like.”

“I would like that,” he agreed.

The candle flickered. It was the start of another year without his clan. But he and Naruto would spar together tomorrow morning. He would feed the stray cats, oil the Uchiha gates, and wear the crest of his clan on his back. Sakura might reach for his hand again. Lately he wasn’t feeling so heavy. 

.

.

As years passed, the tradition changed. It was not a celebration the way it used to be. It was a moment for mourning, remembering. It also felt like beginning.

One year, he leapt over the flame holding his daughter. She wasn’t yet a year old, but her eyes already reflected the fire, like the eyes of any Uchiha. Sakura followed close behind. Everywhere around them was the comfort of warmth and good luck.

Sasuke was no longer alone. He hadn’t been alone in a long time.

.

.

.

.

notes: the fire jumping tradition mentioned in this story is inspired by chaharshanbeh soori, an iranian tradition my family and i celebrate as part of norooz (our new year, which occurs in the spring). i was not with my family this year, so i also jumped over a candle in the hallway of my apartment. it's been a long year. i'm sending my love to all of you!