#yes i have been binge-watching this man's channel

[smoshers-comment]

▶ William Osman - EGG DROP - Smosh Ian vs William Osman

[mikobeautifulheart]

I hear you take requests and here I am👀 it might be a bit long so please bear with me🥹 So a Satoru × fem reader angst plus spicy without smut plz! (haha can I be more obvious?) So the reader was classmate of Satoru and they teach at jujutsu high together now! They are very close with each other and Satoru loves to annoy her. (Imagine like how he is with Nanami but he is actually fun with her and reader doesn't mind his teasing) Everyone knows they are closer than friends but not exactly lovers so they have will they won't they situationship!

Well well trouble comes in paradise when a new temp sorcerer comes to jujutsu high for some mission and she needs Satoru's help with it. She has some interesting curse technique so Satoru takes an interst on it. Slowly Satoru unknowingly starts spending less time with reader. Everybody but Satoru notices this and Reader asks Satoru out to hang out or go on mission with her but he is always busy. (Really he is an idiot cuz he doesn't realize what he is doing lol) Some time pass and after few days Satoru realizes that he hasn't seen reader so he looks for her but can't find her at school so he tries to call her but he can't reach her so he goes to Shoko to ask about her. Shoko has seen how reader has been feeling down due to Satoru not paying attention to her so she makes up a little white lie and tells reader has been injured during mission so she is resting. Truth is, reader WAS injured. A little cut that just needed 3 stitches. She is just at home binge watching shows and eating her favorite food because she just needed a break. Well Satoru doesn't know that so he comes to her house worried out of his mind just to come and see her chilling at home in pajamas with a little bandage. AND HE STILL FEELS BAD because regardless of how small the injury is, it took him this long to realize he hasn't seen you so he apologizes and then things get heated when you both realize how much you missed each other? (Sorry that was sooooo long😭😭😭 also I'm not good at spicy part so do what you want with it!)

No pressure. Write it if you feel like it because I'm just not sure where this whole idea came from lol.

Thanks!♡

OMG YES. OKAY HERE WE GO. (Sorry for making you wait so long I got caught up.) Apologies rn it seems like a bit of a slow burn.

Gojo×(fem)Reader angst

TW: Angst, some spice (but not smut), stitches 🥲

Unedited 1000ishh wordssss

"SATORU" You screamed watching him get stabed and absolutely murdered by Toji.

"no-" you said, your voice broken

You stood frozen, not even being able to move toward him. You felt useless.

He laid motionless on the ground. Toji steped back with a smirk, admiring his work.

He started to walk when he walk right past you.

"What are you gonna do now that your little boyfriends dead?" He said laughing hysterically.

He kept walking on. You wanted to go and kill him. You wanted him to pay but...if Gojo died to him, he would be no match for you. You thought.

Slowly your foot takes one step forward. And another. And another, reaching Gojo.

Your knees weakend so much you fell to the floor in a puddle of Gojos blood.

Your fingers dung into your palm, you didn't know how to do cursed technique, but you asked Shoko how to do it and she told you. But no after how many attempte you tried over time it never worked.

With tears in your eyes you held onto Gojos arm.

"Come on Satoru, remember what Shoko said. Uhhh you spin it then you channel it? And then you uh..." You tried your best to break it down as much as possible.

"Please Satoru" You said hunching your back over his face, your tears spilling now he, wasn't coming back.

You felt a twitch in his hand and some cursed energy flow through your body.

You gasped. The blood around you started to pulse. He was doing it.

"SATORU, PLEASE, YOUR SO CLOSE" you yelled as you saw his wounds slowly heal up.

"Awww man, I got a major headache" He said sitting up.

You could help but wrap your arms around him.

"Wow looks like someone missed me"

"How'd you know?" You said trying to mask your tears in his blood soaked uniform.

"And that's how I met your mother!" You heard Gojo say to little kid Megumi only giving an eye roll.

I thought you said you never wanted to babysit again? Is what you wanted to say but with Megumi there you didn't want him to think you were trying to get Gojo to get rid of him. Even so, it was obvious that Megumi favoured you way over him.

"Hey! You might wake Megumi!" You whispered harshly as Gojo caged your body between his and the couch.

"Hes dead on the inside, plus I don't think he'd care."

His head leans down slowly locking eyes with you when he's only inches away a small voice comes out of no where.

"Ewwww get a room."

"And that's how we trumatised Meguimi!" You heard Gojo telling the first years.

God he was the devil, when he wasn't bugging you, it was Megumi, poor kid.

"Hey stop embarrassing Megumi" you said giving him a slap on the shoulder.

He looked back at you with a wicked smile.

"So when you stab you want it to be right in the neck and pull all the way down yhe torso and just rip it all the way. I know it works because it killed Gojo-"

"And Y/Ns little heart, she was devastated!" Gojo budded in coming from nowhere.

"I'm teaching here." You said. As soon as he arrived you could feel tensions change, you just didn't know why.

"SENSEI CAN I PRACTICE ON GOJO SENSEI!" Maki said with a cursed object in her hand, looking at him like she was going to do more then practice.

"Fine but if you kill Gojo Sensei then I would-"

"Miss him very dearly and be heart broken forever. Then I'd have to burn all our wedding photos." Gojo finished your sentence for you, how kind.

"Were not even married-"

"Yet. We're not even married yet."

" Are you getting this guy Yuta? He's totally pushing it. No way he deserves y/n." Maki said aiming her knife at Gojos head before throwing it.

He caught it.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DON'T DESERVE HER? WE HAVE A KID TOGETHER- I WORK MY ASS OFF EVERY DAY JUST SO SHE CAN TEACH YOU!"

"So he is useful for one thing" Panda said.

"HEY"

"And that's how we became engaged!" Gojo was said, explaining 'your relationship' to the new sorcerer who transferred from Kyoto to Tokyo.

You didn't understand why the needed another sorcerer here but you thought it would be good so Gojo could have more time off (as if) and heck you guys might become friends.

"Hey wifey, this is the new transfer sorcerer."

"Hello" you said with a smile reaching your hand out for her to shake.

"I don't see a ring on that finger" She said

"Oh yeah, were not actually married" you said with a nervous laugh

"Interesting" she said shaking your hand.

"I got a bad feeling about her" Maki said seemingly appearing out of nowhere making you jump in surprise.

"Maki? Well, we just met her okay, we can't make these assumptionsabouther right now." You sighed.

"No, shes deffinatly up to something" Nobora said making your head whip around your other side seeing her with her arms crossed.

"Oh common, maybe that's just the vibe she gives off"

"Yeah people who plan evil things give off that vibe" Panda said behind you.

"Alright okay all we have to do is tolerate her, don't have to like her, but tolerate her at least."

Sure enough not long after that you'd walk around campus and see her clinging onto Gojo's arm laughing at all his jokes. Maybe your students were right.

"No, no your doing it wrong, you go from the torso and rip it right up"

"Yeah right lady, let me just do my thing and you do yours." Maki said annoyed at the woman 'correcting' her.

"Well I'm actually a teacher now so I'd think that I am qualified to mentor you." She said with a grin.

"After all the Zenin clans failure should get all the help she can, right?"

"WHY YOU BITC-"

"Maki? What going on here?" You asked seeing her trying to hold back on staring the woman.

"It seems they aren't very open to criticism" she sranled looking away from you.

"She insulted me about my clan like the little maggot she is, getting under my skin like that. Gross"

"I was just saying the obvious." She rolled her eyes.

"Look, don't insult my students, Maki is one of the strongest sources I know and she worked hard to get here." You said looking at her pissed.

How dare she insult your students. Who dose she think she is?

"Look Miss..."

"Oh you can call me Mrs Gojo."

Your eye twitched. You got to be kidding me.

"If were going to have problems i'll have to tell you to just stay away from my class."

"Oh nobody told you? Well since I moved here Satoru was kind enough to help me get a position in teaching, now your class is my class."

"What? No they can't just do that?" you said now furious

"They can and they did." She said with a smirk.

"Have fun in the feild!" She said looking at you walk away all the way to Yaga's office.

"EXPLAIN YOUR SELF!" You shouted pulling open Yaga's door with pure anger running through your vains.

"We need you out on more missions Y/N, there's been a sudden rise in curses and we need you to help."

"So send the other damn woman!" You said fist slaming down into his desk.

" Your a special grade, shes not even close compared to you."

" Thanks but I don't take flattery as a form of persuasion, give me back my class, I'll work twice the missions after if thats what it takes-"

"No, It's no good to over work yourself" A voice said behind you.

"Satoru, did you know about this?" You said turing your head to him feeling betrayed.

"Hes not wrong y/n there are more curses now, more then even I can handle right now."

"Traitor" you mumbled as you aggressively pushed your way past him bumping his shoulder.

"I hope your right about this" Yaga said looking at Gojo who has his head down.

You were in no power to over turn both Gojo and Yagas decidion so you ended up drowning yourself in missions and everyone you took, the more carless you became. You just let whatever happen happen, a scratch on you? Whatever. Stitches? Okay sure. Cast? what a downer.

Nothing seemed to bother you anymore, nothing motivated you.

"Thanks Shoko but its okay, I'll just put a bandage on it. Wouldn't want to waste your time, plus I got another mission to get to."

"Are you kidding me y/n, its bad enough you don't smoke at all but also the fact you keep coming here almost every hour with a different injury." She said taking a deep inhale of her cigarette.

"Well you know, I got no students, No class room, teaching assistants..." You think of the time Gojo spent dropping into your classes daily and how it would always be a joyful atmosphere. But that rat took your place.

"You know what Y/N? I'm sending you home for a full week, and you have to stay home the entire time. No missions, no Jujutsu. Doctors orders." She said writing a note on her clip board.

You sighed "Thanks Shoko." Even though you didn't want to your body felt so exhausted and so did your mind.

So you got up and walked out of Jujutsu high, when you walked out the field you saw Gojo and ... that woman with your students all on the oval making your heart throb in you chest. You clutched at your shirt hoping this choking feeling would go away.

"Hey Shoko, have you seen Y/N lately? She hasn't spoken much, plus the kids started skipping class since she left."

"When haven't I seen her? She comes here after every mission with a new injury, man you should have seen the last one, nasty, nasty gash just pouring blood every where like she was a fountain" She exaugurated.

"WHAT?!"

"Eh ya'know Y/N stuff, she stopped caring about her self so I ordered her to stay home for a week after her, lets see, 15th visit IN AN HOUR." She said placing a clip board down beside her.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU MENTION THIS EARLIER?!" Gojo said teleporting before Shoko could even respond.

Knock Knock

You almost missed the sound of the knocking, you had the T.V on a high volume to buzz out your reality. You get up and walk through the door, hand on the door knob before you stop.

"If that's you Gojo, i'm busy, I have a mission in 2 minutes." You lied hoping you could drive him away.

"No you don't, Shoko told me the prescription. No curses for a week." He said.

"Now open the door."

Slowly you turned the handle and pulled the door open. There Gojo stood just staring at you. You couldn't physically see him stare but you could feel it, all 6 eyes.

"Was that it?" He asked gesturing toward the small Cinnemaroll bandage on you head.

"Yeah, can you believe it, a week off for this" you said trying to put on a playful tone but it died in your throat.

"You and I both know that that's not the reason for the week off"

"And? You and I both know the reason it happened in the first place. You betrayed me, replaced me, what for? For that...that woman!" you said anger starting to rise.

"Oh is someone jealous?" he asked trying to lighten the mood.

"Look Gojo just go tell that lady your jokes if your trying to crack any, i'm sure it boosts your ego to when she laughs." You sigh going to close the door on him.

His arm reaches out holding the door open before walking into your room.

"Y/N I'm telling you right now, on my life, there is nothing i want with that woman, she just sticks around a lot and is kind of helpless, so we out her in teaching"

"Yeah. And she thinks that to huh? Calling her self Mrs Gojo and all huh." You said watching as he closed the door behind him.

"What? She did? besides the point okay, you want the truth? I dont like her, I even told Yaga to send her back to Kyoto, your not you right now but you need to see that it hurt me to-"

"Why? because she took your spot as the strongest or something? Replaced you? She-"

"Because I like you."

The room fell silent.

"Its not worth keeping anyone around if their going to drive you away from me. Because I really do want to be more than just what we are now, whatever it is." He said leaning closer to you, making you move all the way to the arm of your couch.

"Well maybe you should have thought about that before, because I always...I always waited for you, but every time you just turned it into a joke, I don't want to be a joke to you Satoru but you make me one"

He takes a bigger step forward, wrapping his arms around you, making you fall onto the couch backwards.

"I'm sorry" He said moving strands of your hair aside and kissing the bandaid.

"I just...I want to move on" You said feeling his hand slowly travel down your head to your neck, gently drawing patterns on it.

"Why?" he said now leaning down and kissing the nape of your neck.

"Because- you'll never need me, when theres something, some one new i'll just be cast aside again." You said feeling tears pool in your eyes.

He hovers his head above yours.

"That's not true." he said before brushing his lips over yours.

"The problem is- I can't move on from you" You said finally feeling his lips on yours.

He pulled away wiping the tears from your eyes.

You heard his breath hitch as he went back down and gave you another kiss, but this one was more passionate, filled with all emotions. One of his hands glides up your thigh while the other went behind your head trying to get his tounge in deeper.

"I'll never hurt you again, I promise."

Your arms wandered up his shirt feeling the out lines of his chiseled abs. Slowly you could feel his chest rise up and down as things got more heated and you found your self pulling him closer to.

That night you almost forgot about the past few days as Gojo just kept littering your skin with kisses and hickeys. You wished the Kyoto lady was still there so you could show them off.

AUTHORS NOTE: @mo0nforme I AM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG, USUALLY IM FAST-ER. I just got busy for a few days but now i'm back to posting regularly so, yay? Hope you liked it thanks for reading. reblogs r goot

[invisiblefoxfire]

Listen up, fellow queers and token straights, we're not gonna whine about the lack of new media during the strike and we're not gonna waiver in our support of the strikers.

In the meantime, we are going to recommend to each other more already-existing media than any of us could ever watch given several lifetimes to do it in.

I'll go first. Here are just a few of the creators I care about and want you to support.

FREE TO WATCH:

Filmjoy: This YouTube channel (Movies with Mikey, Deep Dive, etc.) makes incredibly well-produced video essays on film and occasionally TV and games. The channel's focus is on positivity and finding things to love about everything. And YouTube doesn't promote that sort of thing anymore, so the channel's creators (one of whom has multiple sclerosis) are running out of money and close to losing their house. Binge these genuinely incredible video essays with adblock turned off or, better yet, sign up to their Patreon and binge them with adblock on. Seriously, I love this channel so much, and if they don't get a boost in income soon, they're going to have to stop making videos. And I want more videos. Seriously, even watch the videos about things you haven't seen. They've persuaded me to watch loads of stuff I never would have watched otherwise and they're very good about not spoiling things (and giving spoiler warnings when needed).

AyeForScotland on Twitch: This is Tumblr's very own very handsome pro-Scottish-independence @ayeforscotland who has an incredible accent and plays loads of interesting games. He's going for Partner on Twitch now, which he has already earned but been denied due to an absurd technicality regarding whether viewers being linked to the channel directly from Tumblr integration. Go follow him now if he's not live, and when he goes live, go to Twitch and manually click on his name to watch the stream, since that's apparently the best way to get him the boost he needs. He sometimes has @thebibliosphere on as a guest (DOUBLE SCOTTISH ACCENTS HELL YES) and you can watch archives of many of his streams on his YouTube Channel.

Africa Everyday: This YouTube channel is run by Babatunde, a Nigerian man who shares his life and culture, makes cooking videos, and generally is a pleasure to watch and listen to. Seriously he's one of the kindest human beings I've ever spoken with. The money he earns from the channel goes towards helping his family and his community.

CHEAP AND WORTH PAYING FOR:

Dropout.tv: You simply will not find better comedy entertainment for the money. A monthly or yearly subscription is just a few dollars a month and gives you access to countless hours of top-quality entertainment from a company that started their own streaming service rather than cater to YouTube's algorithm. This is the place that started as College Humor, but if you haven't seen them in a while, you really need to check it back out. They're incredibly inclusive in their casting and theming and the production values are insane. I recommend starting with Game Changer, a show which has made me laugh so hard I choked and almost threw up. They also have Dimension 20 (or D20), the highest-quality DnD series out there, with custom-made sets and minis, usually with a focus on sheer comedy rather than drama (most of the cast members are comedy writers or comedians) - but it WILL and I mean WILL make you cry now and then. The currently in-progress season of D20 is called Dungeons and Drag Queens and the players are four literal actual fucking drag queens including Bob the Drag Queen and friends? You need to be watching this. If you have any doubts about whether Dropout is worth it or don't have any money, you can watch many full episodes for free on the CollegeHumor YouTube channel, although they have to censor the swears on there.

Nebula: Remember Lindsay Ellis? She left YouTube because of [too many reasons to list] but it turns out she's still active, she's just on Nebula now. Nebula is the co-op of streaming sites. Users sign up for a low monthly fee and the income is distributed among the creators, weighted according to how many views they get. The videos are uncensored and ad-free and contain lots of stuff that later needs to be edited out of YouTube videos to avoid copyright strikes. They've got FilmJoy on there (remember them from the start of this list?), Philosophy Tube (@theabigailthorn), Jacob Geller, Extra Credits, and loads and loads of other stuff on all different sorts of topics. Many of these channels also have YouTube channels that contain most of their content if you can't afford a Nebula subscription, but Nebula supports them more and gives them more creative freedom.

I'm gonna stop here for now but I'll add more in reblogs as the strike continues.

I hereby invite all of you to ruin my notifications until the strike is over. Reblog this, add your recommendations (especially ones that most people might not know about), and pass it on. There will not be a single complaint about lack of things to watch while the strike is ongoing.

(Why yes I am looking for more things to watch too. I've already seen all of the above. Bring it on.)

(And if you have a few dollars to spare, support the strikers directly at the Entertainment Community Fund.)

[wooahaes]

it only takes a taste

pairing: youtuber!hoshi x gn!youtuber!reader

prompt: so i made this post once.

word count: 1.6k~

warnings: food mentions. people speculating on reader n hoshi’s relationship (please respect CCs btw). also abrupt ending. very minimal proofreading.

daisy’s notes: i would teach him to cook. also spot the mark lee quote. also shout out to @savventeen for hoshi’s youtube channel name bc the man would 100% do a pun, thank you savv!! also yes the title is a musical reference shh my theatre kid is showing.

Standing in your kitchen and listening to you do your intro was supposed to make all of this feel more real, and yet Soonyoung couldn’t believe he was standing with you.

This wasn’t the first time the two of you had even interacted at this point: you met up in a cafe to talk about recipes a few days ago and to formally introduce yourselves to one another. He had stupidly confessed he was a huge fan of your videos and often watched them before he went to bed, since your ASMR cooking videos were extremely relaxing--even if they’d always make him hungry--and your collabs were usually entertaining. It’d been a lot of praise toward you that made him flustered, and his heart had skipped a beat when you admitted to--despite not knowing much about the “KwonFire” YouTube channel--having binged his choreography videos over the past few days. You’d done a collab with Chan from Dino’s Danceology (a friend of Soonyoung’s), and that was how you were introduced to him. He was going to be in the area, Chan had suggested he meet you (completely because he knew that Soonyoung was a fan), and you were the one who suggested the collab.

He said yes, because Soonyoung’s stupid crush on you spoke louder than the voice in his head reminding him he couldn’t cook for shit. That little voice also was quieter than every “holy shit, they’re even cuter in person” thought he had in that cafe and during the grocery trip the two of you took (and recorded with the help of Wonwoo--your long-time friend who was the “brains” behind the channel in terms of editing and recording) to get the ingredients.

It isn’t until you turn to him after he introduced himself that he accidentally confessed a “I can’t cook,” with the most sheepish expression.

You had paused, uncertain of how to respond for a moment before smiling. “Some of my guests can’t,” you said with a shrug. “I do most of the work anyway,” you giggled, “all you have to do is stand there and look cute--and tell your story.”

Wonwoo rolled his eyes from behind the camera, unbeknownst to you. Soonyoung barely caught it, and grew a little more flustered as he smiled back at you. “I still want to help.”

You had said a quiet “don’t worry, you will,” that would get cut out in the video itself before the two of you started running through the recipe.

It felt surreal to watch you, in person, begin to run down ingredients. He’d watched you talk about Chan’s favorite spicy fried squid recipe, giving background information as you went--and even now, while running through the recipe for budae-jjigae that you two had settled on (out of several of his favorites), you gave the same attentive care. Even listening to you talk about the origins of the dish coming from people looking for food on American military bases after the Korean war was fascinating.

You turned the table over to him officially as you set him on opening up a few packages. Being in front of the camera, in a sense, was easy. He wasn’t Kwon Soonyoung, he was “Hoshi” from KwonFire who goofed off with his friends behind the scenes and made people laugh--especially in the outtakes of his choreography videos. Yet standing next to you, it felt like he was Soonyoung and only Soonyoung, who could still make someone laugh but was so quiet when around people he barely knew. He had met Wonwoo once through a friend, Seungcheol, way back before Wonwoo became your friend. Things had begun to flow easily when he had that in.

He was cutting SPAM into thin slices as you instructed, watching carefully as he worked, as he continued, “I like it because it’s a good dish to have with friends and family. Food brings people together, right?”

Something had lit up in your eyes that Soonyoung loved. He saw it in your videos, too: a genuine love of food and what it meant to people. “Right,” you said, and then gently reached out. “Be careful when you get too close to your fingers,” you said gently. “But you’re doing really well! I’ll check the ramen water if you can slice these into diagonal slices for me,” you slid over a package of thick sausages, “and the tofu into half-inch slices.”

Soonyoung had watched you step away for a moment, and immediately looked to Wonwoo for help. “Half-inch...?” He mouthed at him, and Wonwoo gave the smallest of shrugs before nodding for him to ask you. That was the point of the show, right?

Before he could even try to, your head shot up. “Oh my god, wait, no, one-and-a-half centimeter slices,” you immediately turned around. “Metric system. Right. My last few guests grew up in America so I converted the measurements--” You were so visibly flustered, apologizing again as you turned back to the stove top. 

Oh. Cute. Soonyoung smiled to himself as he set out to continue cutting up ingredients. That much he could definitely handle, after all.

Soonyoung listened carefully to you as you continued to walk him through a recipe you claimed to have not heard about until he told it to you. How much had you memorized? But you had placed most ingredients--save for things like the instant ramen and the rice cakes--into the pot, alongside the sauce and the chicken stock.

Even when the two of you sat down to enjoy the recipe later at your kitchen table, Soonyoung was positive he was making a fool of himself. Every time you spoke up, he looked up at you attentively enough that it made Wonwoo shoot you a knowing glance. Wonwoo fucking knew. Most people who knew him probably would, at least. Strangers in the comment section?

Also somehow knew.

He’d rewatched the video when it went up, listening to how he sounded when he was talking to you. He was, as Vernon had said when he sent him the link, “down bad” for you. And maybe he was: he liked your company. A lot of your online persona seemed to come from the real you: someone who loved food and was genuinely passionate about cooking it well. He started half-watching when he noticed the comments. Someone had said he’d practically had heart-eyes for you the entire video, especially whenever you praised him for doing well. Another person suspected that the two of you were dating, only for people to shoot them down in the replies--this sort of talk happened every single time you brought in a cute guest. Another dude had outright linked several timestamps with an “Oh, dude, he’s flirting” right after it. Someone else had linked a timestamp saying “LOOK AT HOW THEY LOOK AT HIM WHEN HE GETS EXCITED FOR THE FOOD” and he stupidly clicked on it. The moment the two of you had sat down to enjoy food and to talk about the experience, his eyes had lit up. You told him to have the first taste, and he swore that the food was better than any recipe he’d ever had before. 

You had this soft look in your eyes when you laughed, prodding fun at him, “Even better than your parents’?”

He shook his head. “Ah, no, she’s--my mom’s going to watch this, so I can’t say it’s better than her’s--”

And you had laughed again, and he saw that lovestruck look on his face. Even when--or especially when--Wonwoo had left a clip where you told him to set the camera down and come try some. He’d placed the camera where it could catch some of you and mostly Soonyoung, but not fully capture Wonwoo (people had seen his face before, sure, but he liked staying out of the spotline in your videos). It wasn’t a surprise that you cared for him, but Soonyoung was surprised that Wonwoo left it right where he did: in clear view of Soonyong looking at you like you were the sun, the moon, and everything else that lit up in the sky.

Vernon was right: he was down bad.

His mom had already called him, telling him that he didn’t have to lie to someone he was clearly trying to impress--whether your food was better than hers or not, she could take one lie for the person he liked. She was proud of him for trying to cook--maybe he should ask you to teach him. Or maybe you already were. She saw the way you two looked at each other, and she watched Chan’s episode too so he can’t lie and say that you did that with everyone--

He promised to talk to you before burying his face in his hands, face growing hotter by the moment. Okay. So maybe everyone did see it, including his own mom.

You had called him almost minutes after he ended the call with her, like you had a sixth sense for it. “Did you see the video?”

“I did...”

“You sound disappointed,” you had said, and he could practically hear you frowning. “Did Wonwoo leave in something he shouldn’t have? I can go back in--”

“Are you free on Saturday?”

Silence. He sat there, waiting for far too long for something. 

And you finally cleared your throat. “What?”

Shit. Might as well shoot his shot now, since there was really no going back. Either you’d reject him or you wouldn’t. “Are you free this Saturday?” He clarified. “We should get dinner together. If you want--I mean, you don’t have to--”

“Soonyoung?” You interrupted. He could practically hear your smile. “I’d love to.”

general taglist: @wonuziex​ @twancingyunhao​

[whatthefishh]

Delta Squared Chapter 1

A/N: So, this story is somewhat based off of Think Like a Man, I thought our favourite boys would fit these tropes quite nicely and wanted to write something fun and kinda silly! I hope can enjoy, even if you have seen the movie because I did make changes :) This will have several chapters, but hoping to keep it easy to follow. This chapter focuses on the boys and Benny. No smut, no warnings really except a few swear words. 2.4k words

It all starts sometime in May, the boys’ weekly outing causing the fates to set you up in front of the TV at just the right time. Well, sort of started then. 

###

(01:23 am) Tom wtffff

(01:23 am) im hiding in the bathroom from that weird girl who smelled like burritos next to us

(01:24 am) can i come out yet

(01:26 am) dunno

(01:26 am) but brb

(01:26 am) santi’s helping me get this girl off my back

(01:26 am) so the one who was basically following me is gone?

(01:28 am) also what youre engaged

(01:28 am) just show her a pic of Mads

(01:30 am) true lol

(01:31 am) im just gonna come back

(01:31 am) if shes standing right outside the bathroom ill scream

(01:32 am) idk what ur talking about but will made a face so maybe he knows who you mean

(01:32 am) then again that might just be him pining

(01:32 am) for that girl

(01:32 am) who broke up with him bc he quit his job

(01:32 am) the one hes been "dating" for 2 weeks

(01:32 am) OH

(01:32 am) santi and fish are trying to tag team this girl

(01:32 am) tag team?

(01:32 am) santi and fish are drunk af

(01:32 am) doesnt mean theyre not gonna do it

(01:35 am) uh yeah it does but whatever im on my way

###

Benny emerges from the haven of the bathroom, immediately making a beeline for the boys’ table. Thankfully, the girl who seemed to be at his elbow at every turn was nowhere to be seen. Even halfway across the bar, Benny could see Santiago chatting up some poor unsuspecting woman and wonders to himself with amusement which line he went with this time, the player that he is. He’s ridiculously successful at this, always has been, even in their time in Delta Force, his ability to charm anybody and everybody driving the boys nuts. Frankie had apparently given up the tag team idea, and let him run his game, choosing to watch from the sidelines. 

Benny checks his phone to see if he got a text from you, sending one out asking how you’re feeling. He feels bad for leaving you at home, sick, but you had insisted he go out with the boys, claiming you’ll join them next time. You two had been dating for years now, bordering on 8, your relationship having been an undefined thing at first due to his back and forth in the military. Once he had come back for good, it was almost too simple how you two had made things official, falling into a routine as easy as breathing. But still… he hadn’t proposed yet. 

You were a relatively successful hairstylist, owned your own salon, got along with the boys, matched his energy for all the dorky movies he was into, and incredibly chill with his energy it was almost too good to be true. You even dressed up with him in a couples costume of Han and Leia that one halloween, binging the movies with him throughout the month to prepare for the role. So, you could be forgiven for mistaking the little velvet box he got you last valentines day for a ring, screaming out “Yes!” until you opened it to see a simple but pretty pair of diamond studs. You didn’t understand why he was waiting, you two lived together, shared a car, planned for your future; the domesticity of your relationship was so deeply ingrained in your bones, everyone already assumed you were married until they noticed the empty space where your ring should be. You didn’t want to pressure him, though. He was your Benny, your best friend, and you loved him so much. Star Wars posters, figurines, and all. 

You flipped through the channels at home, eventually landing on Oprah, recognizing her guest as Steve Harvey, the host from Family Feud. 

“Welcome back, everybody. We are still here with best-selling author Steve Harvey. (Camera switch to Steve) - Well, what I try to get women to understand is that times have changed, but your playbook hasn't. I've gotten thousands of letters from all kinds of women who can't seem to find a man, keep a man or get what they want from their man. Until you understand how a man loves, how a man operates, how he thinks, until you get into the mindset of a man, you will never win with us in the game of love.”

Despite your better judgement, you stayed on the channel to see what new information he could possibly be adding to the world of love advice.

“We have a question in the audience. (camera turns to woman in the audience)- Hi, Steve. I've been living with my boyfriend for five years and he says that he loves me and he's fully committed. I guess what I want to know is, how come he hasn't popped the question?- (camera turns to Steve) He hasn't popped the question because you haven't required him to.” 

You roll your eyes at the pedantic answer, but stay listening to see if you could get anything useful out of this.

###

Benny catches part of Santi’s words to the girl on his way to the table, and the tail end of it has him quickly covering his mouth to hide his laughter.

“I’m sorry, but Jesus has my heart.” The girl had said.

“Yeah, no, no, no, I get that. I love Jesus, too. They actually used to call me Pope back in the military,” Santiago countered, sure that he’d walk away with her number. 

“You boys won’t believe how Santi’s trynna pick up this girl,” Benny says, jerking his thumb over his shoulder as he joins the others at the table. 

“Oh I can already imagine it’s weird, she gave me crazy vibes just by the way she was trying to touch Tom’s beard after 2 seconds,” Frankie laughed. 

Santi returns to the table sooner than any of them would have guessed, and they assume he got shot down - rare, but it does happen. 

“No luck?” Will asks, a little eager to share his misery with someone else at the table. Will’s most recent venture into finding love ended as pathetically as his last; he was too much of a dreamer to keep a steady job after returning home. Apparently, the women he was going on dates with didn’t appreciate his goal of finding something he was passionate about. He just wanted someone to support him, the same way he would give his full support for his partner. 

Santiago looked at each of his friends’ faces and then broke out into a smug smile, “No, I got it. Cmon, you guys really thought I couldn’t? Have some faith.” 

The last comment had Benny cracking up again, and he checked his phone again to see if you’d replied. 

“How’s Daph doin’?” Will asks his little brother, eyes catching him checking his phone periodically. 

“She’s alright, she-” He starts but gets cut off by Fish.

“She's phenomenal, pendejo, we don’t understand why she’s with you,” Frankie laughs, and Santi joins in. 

“Nobody does! How good is your credit score? Do you even know how to check your credit score?” 

They all laugh at that, Benny included. 

“Daphne is amazing, you guys are right. She even loves my nerdy shit. Will doesn’t even like my nerdy shit,” Benny elbows his older brother. 

“You sure about that? Maybe she just loves you. Deep down inside, she’s probably thinking ‘this is some silly ass shit’” Tom counters with his eyebrows raised, challenging him. 

Out of them all, Tom had the least complicated relationship. He just wanted to make Madison happy, simple as that, and Mads felt the same towards him. He was usually the one giving level headed advice around the table whenever the boys would bring up their lady problems, and as much as they wouldn’t want to hear it at first, they usually conceded, knowing he was being reasonable. 

“Nah, I know her, alright? She is just as into all of that as I am.” 

The night goes on in a similar fashion, catching up and teasing, until Tom stands up, stating that he needs to get back to his fiancé, making the others groan in displeasure. 

“When's the wedding again, Tom? You’ll have all the time in the world, laaaaaater,” Santi gripes. 

“You guys still have to take me out for my Bachelor party, how do you not know when the wedding is? It’s next- No, you know what? You can figure it out and plan it when you’re sober, I’m heading out!”

They all chimed in for their goodbyes, knowing they’d see each other in a few days. Benny started to rise from his seat as well, finishing off the last of his beer before announcing his departure. 

“Gotta get back to my girl, she’s not feelin’ too well.” 

“Yeah, I should go, too, gotta pick up my kid from my mom tomorrow.” Frankie adds, also getting up from his place. 

Santiago and Will share a look which doesn’t go unnoticed by Frankie, who immediately gets defensive, “What?”

“Don’t lie to us Fish, you’re gonna go there tonight and she’s gonna give you your onesie and tuck you in the same way she does for your kid!” 

Santiago’s never let go of an opportunity to rip on Frankie’s relationship with his mother. Everybody knew he was a momma’s boy, but now he uses his daughter as an excuse for why he’s over all the time. She cooks all his meals, she does his laundry for him, they even have matching pyjamas which they wear on their movie nights together. He stops by on his way home from work because she’s made his favourite dish, or picked up those socks he likes from Costco. Santiago is only teasing but it’s become glaringly obvious that for all that he complains about being a single dad, Fish doesn’t really make time for another woman in his life. 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever, Pope. Don’t come asking for her pie next time you’re over.”

“Now hey-” Threats were getting serious, Santiago had to back up a bit. 

###

The first bomb had been dropped. 

The next day had you heading to your local bookstore, with your notebook in hand, filled with scribbles of tips from Steve. You had finished the episode of Oprah, surprised to have found some possibly useful ideas to push Benny to the next step in your relationship. Looking for his book, you tell yourself you’re not tricking him, you’re just trying to move forward in your life together. 

Settling in to read for a bit before Benny came home, you found the chapter that focuses on “The Non-committer”, aka your Golden Retriever boyfriend, which described how you need to require him to step up and propose. Your last birthday, the boys came over for dinner; they treated you like one of their own, which was wonderful! Except that it was your birthday, and you were dressed for a romantic dinner for two. You really were one of the boys. Speaking of which, you looked around, noticing how much your shared apartment looked like a college dorm room, one that housed several boys, not the sophisticated adult space you always envisioned. You develop an idea, one that might upset him but that will overall clean up the place and make it look like two working adults live there. There’s a used bong on his favoured side of the couch for fuck’s sake. 

Yeah, that’s it, the first move has already formed in your head, your calculating gaze sweeping across your living room making note of what you’re going to keep and what’s going in storage. The couch will have to wait for another day, you can’t lift it on your own.

Later that evening, Benny comes home while you’re making dinner, chicken wings and fries - not your guilty mind telling you to make his favourite, nope - and his joyful shout at the smell makes your stomach twirl happily. After all these years, his easy smile and comforting presence is still your favourite thing in the world and you want to never stop seeing it. On his way to kiss your cheek in greeting, he catches a glimpse of the drastically different living room space and stops mid-walk, body visibly frozen in shock. 

“Babe! Did we get robbed?! Where’s all of my posters, my figurines?! How did you not notice we got robbed?!!” He’s rushing to inspect the empty spaces.

“Relax, I just tidied up a bit,” you try to keep your voice even and light. “They’re safe, Vader’s safe. I just thought we could paint the living room.”

He exhales in relief, painting he could deal with, painting he could work with. 

“...and redecorate,” you say under your breath. 

“Redecorate?” Benny echoes, confusion taking up his pretty face. “I thought you liked that stuff, why would you wanna redecorate?”

Dropping the last of the wings into the deep fryer you turn to face him fully. “Because, Benny, it looks like we’re still in college. We’re adults, we make decent money, don’t you want this to look like a real home? One where all of our friends haven’t had sex on our couch?”

“What’s wrong with my couch?”

“Baby, it has duct tape holding the back together. We’ve literally had it for ages, and God knows how many times you’ve spilled your bong on it!”

“This couch has history!”

You just level him with a look, before showing him the couch catalogue you were browsing, pointing out the ones you thought he’d like. 

“I’d rather watch How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days with you again than couch shop,” Benny grumbles.

“I know you would because I caught you watching it by yourself a week later. Cmonnnn Benny, it smells so bad.”

“Okay, fine but listen I’m really bad at this. Can you just do it without me? I trust you to pick one. Please?” He leans in to kiss your cheek and heads straight for the deep fryer, gathering the rest of the food to set out for the two of you. 

Surprise colours your face but you’ll take the win. New couch, slightly more adult space, this was shaping up to be a productive evening. The two of you ate dinner, Benny making loud noises of enjoyment from the guilt-wings you made, watching your post-work show together. These are the moments you loved, the simple comfort of each other’s presence, of having your best friend there at the end of every day. 

[thescrapbookingscientist]

Biweekly Media Roundup

- Wednesday (TV) - I’m enjoying this so far. I’m pretty much always down for any premise revolving around a monster school, the mystery is pretty interesting, I like the overall aesthetics and costume design, and I do think the writers did a pretty good job with most of the central cast’s characterization. I have some complaints on the overall monster design and on Wednesday herself, who I think is fine as far as entertaining characters go but is callous to the point where I genuinely don’t understand why any of her peers would ever want to spend time with her, but as far as first seasons go it was solid, and there's always room for improvement later. It definitely stands on its own as a little murder mystery drama mini-series, though I do desperately want to watch the movies again now.

- Defunctland (Youtube Channel) - I don’t normally include Youtube videos here as I watch too many to count but Defunctlands latest documentary on the Disney Channel theme somehow made my cold heart feel things so here it is. 

- Chainsaw Man (Anime) - Finally caught up with the anime and uh. Holy shit. Makima was already a stand-out in a great cast of likable weirdos with her soft spoken voice and androgynous drip but seeing her full abilities in action was really something. Horrifying, well executed, adds so much mystery and intrigue to the show, an excellent addition all around. I am seeing why this series was so hyped up, as while it wasn’t quite what I was expecting it to be I’m definitely having a lot of fun with it. Excellent animation, a little bit of introspection, and some very cool monster concepts, I can definitely see this becoming one of my faves in the future, though it’s raunchy/occasionally gory nature makes it a show I wouldn’t recommend to everyone withought knowing their tolerance for those things first.

- Spy X Family (Anime) - Glad the tennis arc is over, I don’t hate this new love rival character but her and her schemes are far less interesting than Anya’s school issues and everything Yors got going on so I’m excited to get back to that.

- Mob Psycho 100 (Anime) - Not much Mob left, gotta savor it while I can.

- Welcome to Demon School! Iruma-Kun (Anime) - While I adore these characters, I’m not really liking this season as much as the last ones, I hope we get to a new arc soon and maybe get more background on the adult cast or get to see the kids just hanging out more. For this series I want more wholesome comedy not prolonged action tactics- there's nothing wrong with the latter but it’s just so much better at the former.

- The S Classes That I Raised (Webcomic) - Too bad this has such a small Western fandom, as I’ve been thinking about these little guys quite a lot this week. Han Yoojin’s mom energy is just incredibly endearing and the webcomic designs of Moon and Riette are very ...woman yes good musclular  strong arm woman I love mhhmm. I think I’ll make a compilation of Peace photos to put over on my monster blog as the artist really captures the adorable + chaotic little gremlin energy well with the little flareon-thing. This series has now joined my ‘constantly checking for updates’ list for the near future.

- Pokemon Scarlet and Violet (Video Game) - I haven't played this game, but I have been enjoying the character designs. Rika in particular has great casual butch energy. 

- Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint (Webnovel) - This has been here for a good chunk of the year but thanks to an audionovel version I’ve been catching up on it a lot. Just got a bit past the “Incarnation Kim Dokja will be killed by the one he loves the most” arc which sure made me feel things oh boy. I plan to binge read the whole novel over the holidays and let it break me like I know it will.

Listening to: Red Flags by Tom Cardy, Tot Musica by Ado, Shout Out to My Ex by Little Mix, Stay by Reinaeiry, People Watching by Conan Gray, Happy by P!nk, Comatose by Skillet, Fallout by Marinas Trench, All the Boys by Panic! at the Disco, Lent by Autoheart, A Good Song Never Dies by Saint Motel

[cryptic-conductor]

Yes I have a question thats been on my mind since last night. I binge watched 2h32's entire channel and idk if you know this or not, but who exactly is the main character? I know it's P but the "victim" in all this- "I know the pieces fit, Cause I watched them fall away" but I cant exactly find the core of it. From what I gathered the "victim" was

Captured, tortured, killed, shoved into the burlap sack, dropped into the well, and then reborn/made into a demon/monster

But who is it? I thought it was P but during 'Opera' you can see his glowing eye. So maybe it's Doppelganger? Or the headless guy with the mannequin feet? Because maybe his feet were chopped off when he was captured?

So do you have any Theories or know who they are?

Hey there! This is probably gonna be a really long answer; it’s been a hot minute since I’ve been given an excuse to talk/theorize about 2h32 so please bear with me!

This same question really stumped me when I first got into the series because it seemed like the answer was constantly changing. There are plenty of monsters that we see in addition to P, but how many are different characters/entities, and how many are just P in different forms or costumes (he does call himself the Conductor, and he does love his theatrics)? P’s look has been pretty consistent in the more recent videos where he appears, but what about the older ones? What about the humans we see getting captured and killed?

 It also doesn’t help that while there is a story to 2h32, the videos are uploaded out of order so the story beats are all scrambled, at least at the beginning. In more recent videos like “Doppelgänger”, we see the monsters–including P–prowling around a house instead of the woods, attacking humans. But P, at least as we know him now, was never directly seen in the earlier videos. So where exactly did he come from?

At one point on the channel, there was a video called “The Fallen Conductor”. It was five minutes long and actually gave an explanation/told the story of the events that had happened up until “Exeunt”. That video has since gone missing, either deleted or hidden very, very well somewhere else, but I had copied and saved the transcript of the video long before it was removed so I could go back and reference the story without having to rewatch the video each time.

Here’s what “The Fallen Conductor” told us:

Several monsters already existed prior to the start of 2h32. And it seems like P and the monsters struck up a sort of mutual agreement at the start of the series.

“It’s the story of a broken man to whom we offered our help. We invited him over on our side with promises of a new life.”

This then results in P going into the woods, being found by one of the monsters, and essentially being killed and reborn via the whole process of the burlap sack and the well. P becomes one of the monsters, and the narrator in “Fallen Conductor” explains that “With his new nature, came new cravings. His new body was in a constant state of change; He always needed more and more corpses to mend his rotting flesh”

So P starts hunting humans, as we see in videos like “Opera”, “Ode”, and “Ensemble” . It also explains why we see so many different monsters hunting humans, or so many different forms of P conducting his hunts (at least in my opinion; I think some of the monsters in the earlier videos are just different forms of P as he adjusted to his new body and was constantly “mending it” with parts from corpses. And again, he loves his theatrics). Maybe part of the reason we see the recurring images of chains and bodies in burlap sacks is because that’s one of the methods P uses to hunt and capture victims, mirroring his own death in a way (but that could also be me overthinking things).

I’m pretty positive that the Doppelgänger and the Maestro (headless guy with mannequin feet) are two different characters that are separate from P. It is possible that, much like P, they were previous victims of the monsters at one point as well, before becoming monsters themselves. Thus bringing in a whole cycle of victim-to-monster where some humans are killed and reborn, while others are killed outright in order to feed the monsters and mend their bodies.

So yes, as we know by now, P, or the Conductor, is the main character here. He was also a victim of the monsters at one point, albeit a willing one, where they agreed to turn him into one of them as a “promise of a new life”. And through P’s quest for an audience, we get to see both his transformation as well as his hunts for other humans, and eventually we see him and the other monsters cross over onto our side, lurking in houses and killing unsuspecting humans for sustenance, amusement, or perhaps both.

I hope that made sense! Tbh some bits of the series are still fuzzy to me and I can't quite puzzle out how exactly they go together, but that's my best assessment based on what I've seen from the series and what the lost "Fallen Conductor" video explained. If you want I can repost the full transcript for “Fallen Conductor” so you can read the whole thing for yourself. And if you have any more questions or theories I'd love to hear them!

[adultswim2021]

Cowboy Bebop #5: “Ballad of Fallen Angels” | November 21, 1998 | S01E05 Adult Swim premiere: September 10, 2001 - 12:30AM

Could it be that watching five episodes of a show in a row takes it’s toll on a viewer not cut out for binge-watching, or could it be that episodes that end with a fairly context-free montage of backstory can alienate the viewer, especially if they just got done writing up the previous episode while sucking the show’s dick for being the right amount of episodic?

This one does deal with Spike’s past as referred to in other episodes. In episode one the cold open of the show was a similar, context-free and somber montage of tragic stuff happening. Here we get to see slightly more of it at the end of this episode, and I’m guessing we’ll pick up more as the show goes along. Spike was involved in a crime syndicate and, as mentioned in another episode, he “died” three years ago, presumably meaning he faked his death or was presumed dead or he changed his identity or whatever.

On an episodic level this episode is mostly about Faye going off on her own to capture a bounty, getting in over her head, and Spike needing to rescue her. He only does this for aforementioned personal reasons. But this one sorta does drag next to the others. But for all my moaning about modern television being too serialized, I guess this is still pretty normal. You do episodes that are episodic ripping yarns and then after you do several of those you stick in one that deals with the deep lore of the show. Then for the series finale you use those deep lore episodes as a guide for how to end the thing. I guess this is that.

MAIL BAG

do you enjoy marvel movies

Look, does part of me wish I never watched a single Marvel movie so I could say “nah man, shit sucks”. Yes. Most parts of me wish that. But the truth is, I’ve seen, I THINK, every one from Iron Man to Endgame. I abstained from a lot of them until Covid unemployment and Disney+ were a thing and after my tenth Criterion Channel movie I’d be like “let’s watch something I don’t actually have to all-the-way look at the screen for”.

They are okay. Not my favorite shit. I think maybe three of them are actually good? First Iron Man, First Guardians of the Galaxy and the first Ant Man are all really fun solid movies. Wait, Thor Ragnarok is pretty good too.

About once a year I get the urge to go see a major motion picture blockbuster style film in theaters and I’ll pick whichever one looks most palatable and see it, and because I’m in that mindset I’ll come home and give an 8.0 rating on IMDB. I’m still haunted by over-rated marvel movies in my IMDB rating history. I think I gave Captain Marvel an 8.0 because of this.

How many have there been since Endgame, anyway? Fuuuuck dude. I’m not saying I wanna watch them again, but I would for like, some sort of fundraising stunt. And I get to keep the money. Maybe we call it MARVEL FOR MILLIONS?? And I get to have several million dollars after I do it? I can buy a nice house and not let anyone ever come over?? Does this sound good to anyone else??

[watching-pictures-move]

Movie Review | Desert Fury (Allen, 1947)

I’ve been watching some of the movies in the Noir in Color series on the Criterion Channel, and it’s been interesting to see how the use of colour (yes, I’m putting the “u” back in, leaving it out earlier was a great source of shame for me as a Canadian) has, ahem, coloured the proceedings. (And by watching, I mean sweatily binging titles before they leave at the end of the month, something I normally do later in the month, but the next few weeks are gonna be busy, so no time like the present.) In The River’s Edge and Inferno, they emphasized the survivalist aspects of their largely outdoor narratives. (The latter was also originally intended to be shown in 3-D, something that becomes apparent in the two-fisted visuals in the last act. I suppose it could have worked in black and white, but I’m not sure it would have had the same sense of spectacle. I should point out that both movies highlight how striking red hair looks in Technicolor, that’s a peripheral perk of the format.) In A Kiss Before Dying, the overly bright look of the movie forces a certain subtlety and sense of deliberation on the proceedings in a way that anticipates Purple Noon. (The other key takeaway seeing it now is that the casting of Robert Wagner is really on the nose and more effective than it likely would have been on its original release.)

Compared to those movies, this has a more classic Technicolor look, where even muted, earthier tones have depth and richness and practically pop off the screen. Where flesh tones, even in the dark, seem flushed, as blood rises to the skin and emotions come to a boil. There’s a resulting melodramatic quality that nicely accentuates the psychosexual charge of the proceedings. I’m gonna throw in a disclaimer that I’m going to attempt a semi-queer reading of the movie that will likely be dumbassed coming from a straight man, so apologies in advance. But you look at the central relationship of the movie, which isn’t just the attraction between Lizabeth Scott and John Hodiak, and not even a love triangle between those two and the blatantly heterosexual Burt Lancaster, but the tug of war between Lizabeth Scott, Hodiak in the middle, and his servant Wendell Corey, whose response to the situation feels somewhere between gay jealousy and a neglected submissive. Now, as I wrote this sentence, I did some googling on the movie and see that Foster Hirsch characterized the Hodiak-Corey relationship similarly in The Dark Side of the Screen (a book I enjoyed years ago but forgot the particulars of), so my reading is less dumbassed than I initially feared. He also frames the relationship between Scott and her mother Mary Astor as a lesbian one. I’m not sure I got the exact same feeling, although Astor is comparatively masculine and the fact that Scott refers to her by her first name is foregrounded. But there’s some psychosexual spillover into Lancaster’s character, who seems like the classic upright hero, yet has a certain faded quality and bristles when interacting with Astor, expressing indignation at her proposal that he essentially prostitute himself.

Lancaster nails all the shades of the role, from the superficial heroism to the resentment to the queasy misuse of his authority as a cop when he applies a heavy hand to Hodiak. I can see a version of the movie from his perspective, but in light of the previous paragraph, it would probably be less interesting. Actually, almost all the casting is quite good, with Corey’s beady little venomous eyes, Astor’s archness, Scott’s marble-like blue eyes shining with unique luminosity in Technicolor. The only one I take some issue with is Hodiak. Scott is supposed to be attracted to his character because of his disreputable, criminal quality, but Hodiak is initially too flat to pull this off. Imagine someone like Cary Grant in this role, who could bring the necesssary edge and sex appeal to sell this attraction. Yet when he gets his hair mussed, his blood pressure raised and his indignitation worked up, you can understand what Scott sees in him. Basically, the movie doesn’t quite sell why she would fall for him, but it does sell why she’d stay with him even as the situation goes south. And when you get the climactic car chase (which does not capture the raw power of the automobiles as chases Bullitt and onward would do, but is lent excitement by the frantic scoring), and the movie keeps cutting back and forth between them and the distinct way their eyebrows arch down to their eyes, well...I don’t know if it means anything, but it’s a striking series of images.

[aykutiltertr]

Quizas, Quizas, Quizas (Perhaps) - Merci ✩ Rhythm Karaoke Original Traff...  ⭐ Video'yu beğenmeyi ve Abone olmayı unutmayın  👍 Zile basarak bildirimleri açabilirsiniz 🔔 ✩ KATIL'dan Ritim Karaoke Ekibine Destek Olun (Join this channel to enjoy privileges.) ✩ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCqm-5vmc2L6oFZ1vo2Fz3JQ/join ✩ ORİJİNAL VERSİYONU Linkten Dinleyip Canlı Enstrüman Çalıp Söyleyerek Çalışabilirsiniz. ⭐ 🎧 https://youtu.be/Ymr5fXgSSYw ✩ (MAKE A LIVE INSTRUMENT ACCOMPANIMENT ON RHYTHM IN EVERY TONE) ✩ Aykut ilter Ritim Karaoke Ekibini Sosyal Medya Kanallarından Takip Edebilirsiniz. ✩ İNSTAGRAM https://www.instagram.com/rhythmkaraoke/ ✩ TİK TOK https://www.tiktok.com/@rhythmkaraoke ✩ DAILYMOTION https://www.dailymotion.com/RhythmKaraoke ⭐ Quizas, Quizas, Quizas (Perhaps) - Merci ✩ Rhythm Karaoke Original Traffic (Bolero World Music) F# N.C.                Bm    Siempre que te pregunto     Em  F#         Bm Que, cuándo, cómo y dónde    Em  F#       Bm Tú siempre me respondes   Bm      F#      Bm quizás, quizás, quizás [Verse 2] F# N.C.              Bm    Y así pasan los días  Em  F#     Bm y yo desesperado,  Em  F#        Bm Y tú, tú contestando   Bm      F#      Bm quizás, quizás, quizás [Chorus] Bm                 F# Estás perdiendo el tiempo F#           B pensando, pensando B                   F# Por lo que más tú quieras F#                    B ¿Hasta cuándo? ¿Hasta cuándo? [Verse 2] F# N.C.              Bm    Y así pasan los días  Em  F#     Bm y yo desesperado,  Em  F#        Bm Y tú, tú contestando   Bm      F#      Bm quizás, quizás, quizás PERHAPS, PERHAPS, PERHAPS (aka Quizás, Quizás, Quizás) Written by: Osvaldo Farrés (music) & Joe Davis (English lyrics) Recorded by Doris Day on Nov. 5, 1964 for her LATIN FOR LOVERS album. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GUVT1NZtZPo [Intro] | Bm  A  G | F# N.C. | | Bm  A  G | F# N.C. [Verse 1]                    Bm            Em You won't admit you love me - and so F#        Bm       Em How am I ever, to know? F#          Bm You always tell me   G        F#7      Bm Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps [Break] |(Bm) A  G | F# N.C. [Verse 2]                     Bm              Em A million times I've asked you - and then F#7        Bm     Em I ask you over, again F#7       Bm You only answer   G        F#7      Bm Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps [Break] |(Bm) A  G | F# N.C. [Chorus]                       F#7 If you can't make your mind up      F#         B We'll never, get started                  F#7 And I don't wanna wind up      F#             B         B N.C. Being parted, broken-hearted [Verse 3]                 Bm           Em So if you really love me, say yes F#7         Bm             Em But if you don't dear, confess F#7               Bm And please don't tell me   G        F#7      Bm  N.C. Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps [Interlude] | Bm    | Em F#7 | | Bm    | Em F#7 | | Bm   G        F#7      Bm Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps |(Bm) A  G | F# N.C. [Chorus]                       F#7 If you can't make your mind up      F#         B We'll never, get started                  F#7 And I don't wanna wind up      F#             B         B N.C. Being parted, broken-hearted [Verse 3]                 Bm           Em So if you really love me, say yes F#7         Bm             Em But if you don't dear, confess F#                Bm And please don't tell me   G        F#7      Bm Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps   G        F#7      Bm Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps   G         F#     N.C.     F# N.C. Bm N.C. Perhaps - perhaps - perhaps Quizás, Quizás, Quizás Article Talk Read Edit View history Tools From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia "Quizás, Quizás, Quizás" Song by Osvaldo Farrés Language Spanish English title Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps Written 1947 Genre Popular Songwriter(s) Osvaldo Farrés "Quizás, quizás, quizás", sometimes known simply as "Quizás" (Latin American Spanish: [kiˈsas]; "Perhaps"), is a popular song by Cuban songwriter Osvaldo Farrés.[1][2] Farrés wrote the music and original Spanish lyrics for the song which became a hit for Bobby Capó in 1947. English version The English lyrics for "Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps" were translated by Joe Davis[3] from the original Spanish version. The English version was first recorded by Desi Arnaz in 1948 (RCA).[4] French version The French lyrics, Qui sait, qui sait, are by Jacques Larue [fr], with a slightly different meaning. The story is about a man wondering if the flirting of his girlfriend while dancing with an unknown man will have impact on their relationship: "Who knows?". It has been first recorded by Luis Mariano in 1948, on a single for His Master's Voice.[5] Notable cover versions Notable cover versions include: 1951: Bing Crosby recorded the song with the Bando da Lua on February 5, 1951, for Decca Records.[6] 1955: Fairuz 1958: Nat King Cole regularly performed the song with a heavy American

[mia-vita]

WHAT A RIDE!! I loved this drama so much ❤ and I'm a little sad it ended. I'll do a reflection about this drama final episode and a little background story time on how I have found my love for Kdramas again because of Tomorrow.

(My reflection on the final episode and drama as a whole is at the second part with RED words if you only want to read that. 😁)

Now, I want to laugh a bit because I was not aware of the terminology "kdrama" and the Korean entertainment world in general and how popular kdramas are, until this drama showed up in my IG feed because I liked the song in that video and IG started to bombard me with more videos that used that song. Now, I was unconsciously introduced to kdramas back in 2000 and I didn't know it was called like that 😅

Last time I saw a kdrama was probably back in 2005. I was a kid, watching dramas for adults, don't blame my mom. I was very mature for my age even though I was not allowed to see kissing/sex scenes 😅 and back then and kdramas barely had any kissing, IF ANY. So they became my favorite thing to watch.

I used to watch Mexican dramas that in Spanish we call "Novelas" wich usually have about 100 episodes, more or less, and they have kissing in every episode and passionate sex scenes very frequently as well. It's the norm in most Hispanic/Latino TV romance dramas but nothing explicit, as it's broadcasted on regular TV channels.

I loved Kdramas back then, my first love was a drama in 2003/2004 called "Stairway to Heaven" which I saw probably more than 10 times. And I would highly recommend it!

I was infatuated with the main male lead. I mean, how could I not? Look at that...

The funny thing about this, is that this drama made me cry so much every time I watched it, even when I knew the story while re-watching it. And so did Tomorrow as well, I cried 😅, some episodes were a lot.

The one with the dog hit me hard because I lost a dog that I mourned more than I had for a person and even though for some people that episode was irrelevant, for others like me, it was a lovely one.

Well, for some reason I grew up and I started to get busy with school and I wasn't watching dramas anymore and instead I would watch movies when I had the chance. So I forgot my love for Kdramas. And the reason I loved Kdramas so much was because it showed me that I really didn't need that much kissing or sex scenes in order to see the romance between two people and their love story. Although a little hug between Ryeon and Park wouldn't have hurt. That was cruel for us the viewers🙄

I never came across any kdrama content on Instagram, Netflix or anywhere really because that was not in my content search so I guess the algorithm wasn't showing me anything and I wasn't aware that kdramas were a thing, but man!! Thank the lord for showing that video to me because now I'm watching dramas again and I found my love back for them. Quite addictive honestly, I have to be careful binge watching them now 😅

So I started watching Tomorrow without knowing what it was really about, just because I liked that 20secs video and was excited about Ryeon and Park's love story, I assumed it was about them.

Now if someone read this, yes you can laugh at this because you already know I got played with the amount of screen time they got 🤡 that was brutal.

However, I did love the theme of the show, and it's importance and even appreciated many things that were said that will stick with me for the long run.

NOW, THE FINAL EPISODE:

Oh wow, I must say it was better than I expected. Thank you writers 😅

Could it have been better? Sure.

Nonetheless, it didn't leave me unsatisfied as I thought it would, since a lot had to be covered in one hour episode, I was scared it would leave me empty. So in my opinion, they did well.

I binged "Twenty Five, Twenty One" yesterday, that end left me with no hopes for Park and Ryeon at all today. I liked 25-21 ending because it shows reality, but you know, I was too invested into Tomorrow's story that it would have been depressing to watch another end like that two days in a row.

Plus, I have been watching this show as an ongoing show for the past 3 or 4 weeks, and I never do that on Netflix, I didn't even know that was a thing there, I thought they always dropped the whole season at once 😅

I watch things after the season ends because I don't have the patience to deal with the wait. So I guess waiting every week for an episode gave me time to think about theories, read people's opinions in Twitter and here as well, and all of that made me be more invested in the story than when I binge watch a show because that doesn't let me have too much time to be thinking about possibilities.

I don't want a Season 2, because I don't see the point, but I do wish it had at least two more episodes to have more development between Ryeon and Park healing conversation, and Choi's life after waking up. I've read some viewers complain that Lim got almost 3 episodes to cover his story and that the others should have too, but honestly I think they all got about the same amount, the difference for me is that Lim had his story show consecutively and the others stories were more spread out into different episodes. Such as Choi's father story, the mom and sister hardships after he went on a coma, etc.

After all, Lim was part of the main cast and he didn't get as much time talking to the people they were saving, so for me it was a balance.

Now, I do think Ryeon and Park needed a longer conversation at the end, I loved that they were together for the final scene and they looked at each other in a way that it felt like an open ending was up to the viewer to interpret what happened in those 6 months and what would continue to happen after that final episode.

I don't want to read the Webtoon because I read it's different from the series so I just want to keep it for my interpretation of their future relationship. (But if the end is better in the Webtoon, then please someone tell me 😅)

For me I'd like to believe that they are never going to choose to reincarnate because they know that their fate is broken in the land of the living and they won't find each other there. But as reapers they get to see each other, work together, heal together and love each other again. I do think that love between them will happen because now that Park knows his past we saw in their conversation that he realized his mistakes towards Ryeon and the RM team purpose, and he acknowledged that his pride made him misunderstand Ryeon's opinion of suicide and that made him do foolish things as he said. That he realized he went to rescue her from being taken to hell again because of his pride not because of his feelings. And for me that shows growth, and healing overall.

That experience changed him for the better. And I really loved that for them.

I know many complaint about his behavior towards suicide and his hate towards people that think of this as a choice to end their sadness being part of the story line. And I will say, that is a real thing, and I am glad it was part of the show, I have known people like that in the past with that mentality, and although Park changed his view on the show, some people never do, even nowadays when mental health is more prioritized. There are still people like him out there.

Also, others complain about the show not having mental health professionals to be part of the show, I do think it should have been part of it as well indeed. However, the show did have Ryeon as one in the episode with the singer whose wife died. Of course more than that would have been ideal, but nonetheless, it did shine light into it.

Also, many say that the people changing their mind in the last minute by talking at the end was too rushed and simple. Yes, it seems so, but:

One, it's a show with an average of 50min per episode and writers are limited by the channels they broadcast in.

Two, they are grim reapers who's job is to save those that are in their last moments of committing the act. By that time, imagine a friend saving another in their last moment just by talking to them. That happens a lot, not only health professionals are part of that moment when it happens. Also, many can't even afford one at all, or don't want one. Etc.

So my point is that all ways here are valid. Could they have shown more of a mental health professional approach. Yes, indeed.

However, that doesn't make their way in the show wrong either. I mean, Ryeon could have been less aggressive like Choi, but again, is a show, and this world is full of different types of people with their own personality, nobody can judge someone else by their own standard of how someone should be like. And more specifically, is a Korean show, so according to what I have read so far about Korea when it comes to mental health, I think that the show did a good job in addressing the issue of suicide there and the need the country has as a whole.

I heard/read many times how people have killed themselves even after years of therapy. I personally know two people, one unfortunately did die, and the other one survived after the act because the hospital was quick enough. Both had mental health professionals helping them, and both committed the act anyways. Unfortunately this topic is not black and white, there's a lot of shades of grey in between.

I didn't mean for this post to be this long 🤯 I started to write something in specific and now I got a whole essay. 😅 The fact that when I have to do one at college I can't even write a page properly and for things like this I find my ways is just a joke 🤣

If someone read this long, I appreciate you 🤗

P.S. English is not my first language, so I'm sorry for any mistakes 😅

Now an appreciation for the 4 characters:

Ryeon and Mr. Lim are made for eachother as team, those two are cold and honest as F* 🤣 I love them.

Choi, you are so cute, and funny ☺️

And last BUT DEFINITELY NOT LEAST!

Mr. PARK!

I address you at the very end because WOW!

Sir, your gaze towards Ryeon in that 20sec video I saw. That gaze sir, is what made me watch this drama.

And that walk, I got in every episode for a bare minimum of 5 seconds per episode made me excited each time. 😅

I repeated each episode throughout the weeks many times just to see scenes between you and anybody else in the show. That's how much I had to compensate for the fact that you were almost non existent in it sir. 😅

I have to say that Lee Soo-hyuk just added another follower in his career because I'm about to watch anything this man has been on now. 😍 I mean, that man is stunning to watch talk, walk, and see how he looks at things with those eyes. 🤭

Like look at this...

I am very interested in learning Korean because I saw a few episodes in Spanish voice translation, and things were said differently than the English subtitles in many occasions, which I understand since the voice needs to be in synced with the mouth of the actor. However, I have read people say that the English subtitles many times are not as accurate either, so I hate not having the actual thing said translated properly 😅 I like watching shows in their original language because I feel like the tone of the words said are never translated with the same emotions into another language. How difficult is Korean? Asking for a friend 🤣🤣🤣

If someone got here, then here is the video that started everything for me.

Thank you for reading, it was a pleasure to talk about this drama. I'll definitely watch it again in a year or when I feel like I need it. ❤

[thefanficmonster]

omg, headcanons for a goth (not egirl) reader x corpse? i love love love ur writing 🗝

Corpse Husband x Reader (Gender Neutral for the most part but there are some elements that hint to a female reader - feel free to skip those or modify them to your liking)

OMFG DEFINITELY!! Thank you so much for your request, dear! Hope you enjoy the headcanons! XOXO, Vy 💌

- He was intrigued by you the moment he saw you

- Let me correct myself: virtually saw you

- Yeah, you heard that right

- You spotted his attention while he was on videocall with Dave who was facetiming him from VidCon 2019 to offer him some type of a con experience

- The man wasted no time opening an investigation on you right away

- I mean who wouldn’t?!?!?

- You stuck out so much and in such a positive way with your style derailing off the colorfulness of the clothes the people around you were wearing

- Your black and white gown decorated with chains dangling here and there was a dead giveaway that you were the moment that day

- And you were! He had caught sight of you right after your panel for which you had worn the specially made gown

- But not only that, your hair was a story of its own - still is!

- It’s still evenly colored in black and white, making a wonderful effect whenever you spin/twirl

- Yeah, no one can blame Corpse for opening the aforementioned investigation which mainly consisted of asking Dave who you were

- I just want to add, he thought he did that quite casually, but if you ask Dave he can confirm that he sounded like a very nervous schoolboy.

- He’d never admit to it though

- After getting your name and the name of your YouTube channel, he went on a bit of a binge watching spree for a few days

- Props to the guy, you have quite the number of videos on your channel

- Eventually, however, he managed to get up the courage to finally comment on one of said videos and stop lurking

- To be fair, you had noticed him the same day when, after a lot of back-and-forth with himself, he started following you on Instagram and Twitter and also joined on of the Twitch streams you had recorded throughout the VidCon week

- And to the aforementioned comment, much to his relief, he got a friendly reply

- You two hit it off quite well before moving onto DMs and Discord

- It did take a while to finally get on a VC together, both of you shy blobs couldn’t find it in you to do it

- But once you did, you practically never texted again

- And when you finally hopped on a video call was also the day he asked you to be his girlfriend

- Damn straight you said yes

- When you went on a vacation to San Francisco, you stayed with him the whole time which resulted in some bomb pics of the two of you (with Corpse’s face out of the frame of course)

- You often styled him with your accessories and makeup which - as jealous as you are - you’ll admit he pulled off quite nicely

- “You know, maybe the goth style has been made for me!”

- “Don’t get ahead of yourself, pretty boy.”

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[resident-mercie]

Fluff 12 with Carlos, please

(or can we choose more? Then Leon, too, please. Thank you!)

#loveyourwork

wahhhh thank you so much!! of course you can request more than one character!! i hope i do these guys justice <33 ps! i'll make sure i get your second request done for tomorrow!! :D <33

Carlos Oliveira and Leon S. Kennedy Fluff One-Shots - A Happy Reunion.

Carlos Oliveira.

It had been a long few months without Carlos by your side. While you had been home alone, Carlos' job meant he was usually away from home, travelling the world and putting his life in danger to help prevent the spread of the seemingly more prevalent biohazard attacks. It wasn't his fault he was gone – he never really got a say in what missions he'd take, but the pit of anxiety in your stomach was particularly overwhelming whenever he left.

You'd spent most of the past few months working away at your part-time job, throwing yourself into your work to try and distract from the feeling of anxiety when he wasn't around. Other than that, you'd mostly binged watched some shows, and kept yourself occupied through the weekends by baking treats for the neighbors.

It was another slow Thursday, as you sat on the sofa, curled up in blankets. You held the TV remote in your hand, absent mindedly flicking through the TV channels. You wondered how long it would be until Carlos came home. It was a miracle to ever hear from him or his colleagues whilst they were out on the field, which mostly left you worrying about where he was.

Suddenly pulling you out of your gloomy thoughts, a harsh knock against the door permeated the atmosphere. Who on Earth was that at this time? Maybe a deliveryman? A neighbor who needed help?

"Who is it?" You called out, as you headed to the front door.

"Who do you think!" A familiar voice laughed from the other side of the door. "It's me, dummy! I forgot to take my key with me before I left!"

You couldn't help but laugh at Carlos' voice as you hastily turned the key to unlock the door, Carlos coming into view as you pulled the door handle down.

Carlos wore a large grin, tossing all his bags aside, wrapping his muscular arms around you. Even though he'd been gone for so long, Carlos was still the same old goofball, and you loved him for it.

"Man, feels good to hold you again." Carlos cooed, wrapping you in his embrace even tighter.

Leon S. Kennedy.

Your cell phone rang out with a buzz, interrupting your train of thought.

"Oh, hey Hunnigan." You accepted the call, holding the phone to your ear. Leon was due to return from a trip to the White House soon, and you were eagerly expecting some info about his return.

"I have good news for you." Hunnigan seemed to have a particularly happy tone in her voice. "Leon will be departing from the White House soon. However, he's asked for me to inform you of a, um, particular request."

"Oh, yeah?" You pulled a confused face to yourself, readjusting your grip on the cell phone. "What is it, Hunnigan? He's alright, yeah? Safe and everything?"

"Oh yes, he's all in one piece, not to worry. He's actually asked you to meet you at a small 'bed-and-breakfast' place near Washington. I'll forward you the details. Thank you for your time."

"Thanks, Hunnigan." You thanked her before ending the call, opening her subsequent message with details of Leon's location. Trust him to make a big gesture when he hadn't been gone for particularly long.

You packed a small bag with clothes, toiletries and other essentials, before lifting it into the trunk of your car. Setting up your navigator to direct you to Leon's safe haven of choice, all that was left was to hit the gas and find your way there.

When you did eventually arrive at the establishment, you were filled with joy. Leon had picked out a small cottage to stay in for a while, so the two of you could finally have some time in solitude before Leon was inevitably recruited into another mission. Knocking on the cottage door, you found Leon stood ready and waiting for your arrival, yet was taken aback by the fact you flung your arms around him in an embrace, placing a gentle kiss on your lips.

"Leon! It feels so good to hold you again!"

[susiephone]

“I’d love to stop watching TV, but you cancelled school!”

aka, YouTube series to binge when you’re stuck indoors and you’d like to learn a little something.

ART!

Lindsay Ellis’ entire YouTube channel. It’s like film school for people who can’t afford film school.

Here she is teaching you about film theory... via the Transformers movies.

Here she is talking about the ways the potrayals of various characters have changed and developed over the years.

It’s Lit! A series hosted by Lindsay Ellis in collaboration with PBS, about reading, writing, and the publishing industry.

Brows Held High. Half comedy reviews, half artistic and political analysis of “highbrow” films -- often both at once.

Also he has talked about Shakespeare a LOT. Like, so much, you guys.

ThugNotes. Advertised as “classic literature, original gangster.” Sparky Sweets, PhD, summarizes and analyzes some books you may have heard of.

Terrible Writing Advice. Teaching you how to write by telling you how not to write.

Maven of the Eventide. A very nerdy goth lady reviews vampire-focused content, and has thus talked quite a lot about the history of the vampire genre and how it’s developed over the centuries. It’s so awesome. She also has really cute kids who show up sometimes!

SCIENCE!

Sexplanations. One very smart lady answers all your sex ed questions. Yes, even that one.

Tibees. A PhD student explains physics and math... in the style of Bob Ross, baking videos, and shitposts.

Cool Worlds. Videos about astronomy and space and other planets, for when you want to think about how small you are.

Minute Physics. Complicated scientific ideas, in short, easy to digest videos.

SciShow: Hank Green and friends tackle serious scientific queries, like, “Why don’t we just throw trash into volcanoes?”

HISTORY!

Ruining History. Shane Madej infodumps about salacious periods in history that were left out of the books. People have always been weird, y’all.

On that note: Puppet History! It’s a new one, but it’s a lot like Ruining History, but with puppets and songs, too.

BuzzFeed Unsolved: True Crime. If I get mysteriously murdered with no leads, Ryan and Shane are the only people allowed to talk about it. 

Also Supernatural often has some interesting historical tidbits.

MISCELLANEOUS CRAP!

Adam Ruins Everything. One very earnest, very nerdy man annoys his friends and family by debunking common misconceptions about everything from chemistry to the TSA to the funeral industry.

Last Week Tonight. Comedy news program hosted by a sad British man in America. Depending on the episode, you might see him get in a jockstrap-related feud with Russel Crowe, troll the FCC with robocalls, or interview Edward Snowden. Constantly wastes HBO’s money on stupid shit. Always funny, always informative, and he hates Trump SO. GODDAMN. MUCH.

Defunctland. Our host Kevin gives us the rundown on theme park attractions, and sometimes whole parks, that don’t exist anymore -- how they were developed, and why they ultimately shut down.

He also has a side-series about kids’ TV shows that don’t exist anymore.

And a miniseries about the works of Jim Henson.

Daily Moth. American news given in ASL, with full English transcripts.

Ali Abdaal. A Cambridge grad talks about life has a junior doctor, and how to study and work more effectively.

Feel free to add!

[canyouhearthelight]

The Miys, Ch. 159

This chapter has a bit of a treat in it... let me know if you figure out.

Thanks for the science in this chapter and the previous one go to “Answers with Joe” and “Kurzgesagt - In a Nutshell”, two of my favorite YouTube channels.

Always thanks to @the-raven-fae, @baelpenrose, and @charlylimph-blog for your inspiration and beta reading. Shoutouts to @quantumizedinsanity, who just speed-ran the story to get caught up. Also, @breathingintheash and @freddie444 who recently binged the story!

Bonk.

Bonk.

Thwap.

Bonk.

Bonk.

Thwap.

I rotated my right shoulder to ease the burning feeling that was building up, before switching to my left hand to repeat the exercise. Throw the ball…

Bonk. Floor.

Bonk. Wall.

Bonkbonkbonkbpbpbp…. I missed the catch with my left hand, and ended up chasing the ball. Fighting my vertigo, I managed to catch it much sooner than I had with my right.  My balance was certainly improving, at least a bit.

“Shit,” a voice swore softly behind me. I turned to see Charly’s arrow buried in a target, but her face dark with a scowl.  Before I could ask, she blurted out. “That wasn’t the target I was aiming for!” After two deep breaths, she carefully drew an arrow and sighted it again. I paused to watch, this time witnessing that the arrow at least was midway between her intended target and the one she hit last time.

For all our planning and strategizing, no one on the Ark had been prepared for spin-based gravity.  We managed to, at no point in the time we had been underway across the freaking galaxy, notice that we were under “spin-induced microgravity with atmospheric augmentation”.

Which was Science for “spinning slowly enough to establish a ‘down’ and being blown toward the floor”.  At what equated more than Earth-sea level pressure. It made some weird kind of ‘okay, tracks’ sense to me.

Now, however, our microgravity was apparently dependent more on spin and less on fans. Which, in the plainest of terms, meant the entire human population of the Ark were reduced to dizzy toddlers, in opposite proportion to height.  In my personal circle, this meant that Charly, Tyche, Hannah, and Ivan were able to walk with mild difficulty and practice sharp projectiles, being on the lesser end of the height handicap.  Arthur, Parvati, Alice, and I regularly practiced bouncing tennis balls off the walls to correct our hand-eye coordination.

Conor and Coffey were flat-out bedridden the past week.  They could sit, crawl, wheel about in a chair, but standing was still a practice-based exercise.  The words “they weren’t happy” were currently equivalent to saying “The End was inconvenient”.

Then, we had our outliers…. Maverick was entirely capable of slouching his beautiful six-foot-one height to a painful-looking five-nine.  It made me more nauseous to look at than it did him to perform, but nonetheless, it kept the vertigo firmly under control.  Nixe was entirely - and I do mean entirely - unphased, citing the variance between being one hundred feet underwater while freediving against being sea-level on a daily basis. “This,” she had waved, annoyed, “is nothing. Pah!”

Jokul, astonishingly, could walk around entirely upright and standing proud. No matter how much he was questioned or observed, he was baffled at our curiosity.  Somehow, the man had never been dizzy in his life.  No amount of medical scans could account for it, meaning no inner ear abnormalities or accustomed vertigo. He just… didn’t get dizzy.  No history of brain damage, or free diving, nothing.

I had never been more ready to kill him in my life. The only saving grace was that he was the only human on the Ark able to stand upright and prop up Conor or Coffey for physical therapy.  He also was utterly unruffled at being puked on, thankfully.

Bonk. Bonk. Thwap! “YES!” I crowed as I half-bounced in a circle, left hand held triumphantly over my head.

Bonk. “FUCK!” Arthur swore, rubbing his nose. “You know, I don’t get it. You have vertigo. And brain damage. And one of your arms is younger than Sparkle. But you got the hang of catching a stupid ball faster.”

“Third go around on this, buster,” I grinned smugly. “The muscle memory isn’t there yet, but the knowledge of how to get it back is.  Also… throw wide, not close… geez.”

For the first time in our actual acquaintance, I saw his jaw clench. “I. Threw. Pens. for my first year on the ship.”

“I threw crepes,” Hannah inserted gently as she focused on her therapy. “Well, I flipped them.  Worst case scenario, I had an ugly crepe.”

Arthur opened his mouth to rebut, but before he could say anything, Tyche shouted a stream of obscenities that I only half understood. “Tike,” I yelled half-heartedly. “They’re practice knives, they aren’t terribly sharp. Calm - “

Fuck.

Suddenly, both my friend and my sister were ripping into me furiously.

“They should be sharp - “

“Never in the history of - “

“You gave her fake ammo?”

“What if someone attacks right now!?”

“STOP! SHUT! UP!” I bellowed, hard enough to make my chest and throat hurt. “You!” I pointed at Arthur, firmly enough to actually make him back up as I stalked forward. “There is no such thing as fake ammo when you are dealing with knives. Dull knives will cut a finger off by accident faster than a sharp one.”

Whirling, I leveled myself at Tyche. “And you! You know better!  If someone were to attack, right this moment, you would go for blunt objects and a shotgun before you would go for your knives, no matter how sharp they are. And a properly wielded spoon can do more damage than a poorly used knife.”

By this point, I was actually seething with frustration, nausea, and more than a tiny bit of actual anger.  After watching me take six or so deep, panting breaths, Tyche nodded.  Yes, her jaw was clenched, but she stalked down the errant knife and resumed her practice with far quieter swearing.

Arthur, on the other hand, just glared at me.  After what was roughly three minutes, I shrugged and turned back to my wall.

Bonk.

Bonk.

Thwap.

Bonk.

Bonk.

“FUCKING HELL!”

Without a word, I chased down my tennis ball and started again.

Bonk.

Bonk.

“Okay, that was on purpose!” Arthur scowled after dodging my next attempt.

“Then catch it,” I shrugged, bouncing the ball off the floor a couple times, paying attention to the direction of the drift.

Bonk.

Thwap.

Bonk.

Thwap.

Bonk.

Bonk.

“HAAAAA! Check it out!” he crowed, holding my tangerine-orange tennis ball over his head.  After half a victory spin, he fell on his ass, but laughed like it was the funniest thing ever.  Soon, he stood carefully back to his feet and handed the ball back to me.

Bonk.

Thwap.

After I bounced my against the floor a couple of times, he dug his out of the seating around the gym and started with just bouncing the ball to his hand.  Hannah was smiling as she practiced ricocheting hers off several objects - steady, but with little power, not quite confident enough to start hurling it across the gym like Arthur and I were.

Eventually, Arthur and I were essentially playing low-stakes handball, bouncing our tennis balls off the floor, the wall, then to each other.  Scrambling over the gym floor, we tried harder and harder angles.  Soon, six out of seven shots were being caught and bounced back. 

We were working up a solid sweat and a lot of ammo to tease each other later, when I suddenly couldn’t breathe or see.  My eyes were burning and watering furiously, and my throat wanted to collapse on itself in the confusion between ‘don’t breathe’ and ‘cough it up’.  An unholy pain ripped through me as my stomach tried to reject what was going on, without any way for my diaphragm to get out of the way.

Black was flooding my vision when small hands shoved a breathing mask over my face, and not at all gently.  However, the coppery tang of my split lip was a welcome trade for the sweet, sweet air that flooded my lungs.  The bad news was that the first full breath I took relaxed my lungs enough for my stomach to take over - 

Charly ripped the mask off of me the second I started exhaling so that I could wretch against the floor, apologizing the whole time.  I heard ‘only ten percent’ and ‘seemed like good incentive’, along with infinite iterations of apologies as she gently swapped me between inhaling oxygen and coughing out the hellacious fire in my lungs. As soon as I could breathe well enough to talk - and right before I passed out - I made a point to give her my best two-thumbs-up. 

“That was perfect. Use that one,” I croaked.

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[sugar-petals]

Baekhyun Doms You: Ending Up Laughing

↳⎡NOTE.⎦thought this’d be an interesting concept & a different side to smut: what if you try things out and it’s both not your thing? w/ a humorous twist and subby bf moments sprinkled in 😄

♡  words. 4k

+ tags ⚠️ pwp hc, bondage, throatfucking, graphic, cum play, unsafe/clumsy practice: do not recreate, degradation, biting, masochist bbh, domme!reader switches unsuccessfully, whips, hair-pulling

imagine that. a wide-eyed baekhyun pacing and tiptoeing in front of your toy shelf, trying to pick a riding crop he fancies. it takes five minutes and several ‘uhh, ohh’ confused puppy noises until he’s able to decide which one he’s taking. 

...literally even if he knows exactly which one does what. you’ve used all of them on him. 

meanwhile, you take three seconds flat to pull out one that fits your mood and proceed to edge the living shit out of him. yes, without literal further ado. teasing his dick and marking his thighs and doing all kinds of delicious things. 

he’s still going back and forth in his head without having even started out. cutely tapping and swaying from one foot to the other. 

it’s like he’s back to school. priceless.

what’s even more hilarious: baekhyun practices random mean facial expressions while trying to decide. he doesn’t seem to be sure what character he’s going for. it feels like he’s rehearsing for a concert or photoshoot, even. absolutely fascinating to watch. 

i mean he’s absolutely photogenic no doubt about that but

you’re sitting on the bed waiting naked like okay is this gonna be william shakespeare deluxe or what is kyoong channelling over there

“um... i think i got it! this one, okay? i’m ready!”

finally he walks over, strutting with his nose in the air and his eyes glaring, muscles tense, a mysterious bad boy charm about him, whip ready to sting, lips tight and punitive...

....and hits his pinky toe on the bed

oh the pain

great master baekhyun flops headfirst into the sheets processing the existential cruelty of bedpost pinewood and needs head pats to recover

lots of head pats

at least twenty of them

so many head pats

more time passes until kyoong is back in character i guess

you probably could have listened to exo’s whole discography in the meantime

and knitted a rug for taemin’s new flat

anyway

baekhyun tries to act very confidently finally getting into it 

adopting a sharp ‘hmph’ kind of tone 

endlessly teasing your back and thighs with the riding crop

so far so good sir pinky toe

but he just goes on and on

you could actually crochet a pair of socks for chen’s daughter now that you think about it

it’s you who has to tell him to get to the point and it’s clear he’s more nervous than he pretends to show

to be fair he’s not the only one

you try to get yourself mentally ready but you find yourself giving him actual orders and even correcting his stance five times cuz he’s so wobbly on the mattress like a pupper indeed

baekhyun mumbles to himself and has a hard time fully implementing the advice on posture but tries to aim well regardless. it seems to work at first

but tragically

he ends up with a miss, hitting his own thigh rather than your ass and moans out loud

now you’re the one confused because you were waiting for the whip to come down

but nope it went elsewhere did it

you wonder how he managed to do all that furious fencing in the obsession mv with an aim like that

looks like he’s so submissive, he straight up whips himself

taking matters into his own hands is he. subs these days.

baekhyun keeps on being wobbly on the bed and looks like he ran a marathon already

may i remind you that this guy does 3-hour long concerts and can practice throughout an entire night

... you both agree to immediately scratch that completely after his next flailing strike sends the riding crop flying into his unsuspecting, non-consenting plushie collection

animal cruelty

moving on

you figure that a change of location might be a good idea

baekhyun sits you down on a chair and bashfully stores away the yeeted whip

he vows to never use a riding crop again already and his teddy bears are thankful for it

now the whole plushie village and whole china knows how you don’t do it

next up is rope

what could possibly go wrong

he practiced wrist bondage on his own ankles for five days straight, you really prepared a lot of things to test out together today 

and he’s seen you tie him up over and over and over

but whatever it is that he manages to install on your arms 

looks like a piece of very experimental modern art that just sold for half a million at sotheby’s

what’s supposed to be a column tie is nothing but a mere... ball

chaotic like baekhyun’s personality. not surprising at all

wait that rhymed

anyhow

even alexander the great couldn’t have cut this gordian knot of a tangly masterpiece

ironically: while baekhyun’s roughly grabbing your chin for an intense kiss... the rope casually falls apart harder than the soviet union in 1991 my loves, you ain’t ready

baekhyun takes ages to notice while he’s teasing and kissing you and ends up sweating bullets when he realizes that the sublime art fell to pieces.

sorry comrade 

the fantasy knots and artistic freedom increases even more when it comes to putting a collar and leash on you

and his guy is supposed to be a dog owner? mongryong, instruct your man

baekhyun is a flustered mess trying to fasten it on you even if he tries very hard to be concentrated

maybe it’s because you’re watching him with literal hawk eyes checking every move (...hoping he learned something from you oh my). you’re not really melting into your role either, huh. the only thing melting is your pussy because baekhyun is acting so embarrassed which is the actual turn-on

if that doesn’t give you away

the leash comes off in two minutes time after baekhyun miraculously ties his own hands together with it

how the fuck did that happen

how do you even manage to do that

eager are we

after whipping his own thigh, self-domination 2.0 i guess

so whipping and bondage are off the programme 

this has been the most chaotic and hazardous attempt at topping in the history of sm entertainment

and they’re literally called s and m

...humiliation is next

when you planned your session you both figured hey he’s tested and tried by exo’s lively debate culture and he might be able to pull that off

and there are no props involved so he’ll have an easy time right

life is an illusion

you find out he can’t pronounce degrading names clearly because he keeps on stuttering them. which in return makes baekhyun crack up. 

carrying on the joke, you correct him every time. 

“i want you to repeat after me: stupid, slutty, bitch.”

it ends up as you doing what you always do 

teaching and training him while baekhyun either shyly or brattily obliges. you don’t even notice how you’re doing it but from the outside, it’s blatantly obvious.

because your brain is still feeling in domme mode, you also find yourself saying the usual things to him without thinking, even when he grabs you and gives orders. “now bend over! i’m gonna fuck your brains out.” — “okay, cutie!” 

which causes baekhyun’s mean face to collapse and he snap out of his command tone immediately, snorting because it’s the last thing he expected

he tries to carry on by punishing you with an actual mouth gag and a harness he can hold onto while fucking you from behind, i mean your pussy is already wet why not

guess what’s gonna ensue

wearing a harness feels kind of strange and new so you wiggle back and forth and all over the place. like what is this, what’s happening. baekhyun’s dick is going into all kinds of directions my friends, the amusement park carousel surely inspired this fucking style right here. 

and wearing a gag — there’s a way different person who needs to have this in his chatty mouth. 

kai and kyungsoo’s dream would come true and yet you’re the one gagged 

something ain’t right

if you’re honest. you’re feeling so weird being on the other end of punishment tonight and not being able to give him any directions. your dom brain is worrying he’s all left to his own devices trying to drive that confused dick home left and right and above and below and diagonal and crosswise. 

the fuck

your poor guts my god

what’s worse: his stamina is gonna sneak up behind him and tap on his shoulder like... bro that’s enough pounding for a whole month please spare these balls from deflating please do not break this device

to which your pussy agrees in unison

how are you gonna love your bub day in day out if you’re that sore

there’s nothing more frustrating than being sore and horny with byun baekhyun at your disposal

or a knocked out boyfriend trying to generate at least a sprinkle of semen after getting completely emptied in one go

probably sleeping for three days straight

alright so the harness and gag come off fast oh dear baekhyun clears those away in a heartbeat

that’s another point off the list 

the more you know

carousel cringe dicking down type of dominance... bizarre, disorderly, totally erratic, not on the agenda, worst rated on bing 

comrade baekhyun keeps on apologizing for making things so messy even if he tries and tries

you’re both so puzzled because you’re used to something so different and need a water chugging pause

baekhyun hasn’t sweated this hard since doing the MAMA choreography

and your pussy has never had to provide this much lubrication at once

where on earth is both of your usual stamina what happened

if a type of sex exhausts you fast and even baekhyun’s balls are suddenly moody you just know you’re wired in the opposite way

safe to say you’re better at giving and baekhyun is better at taking

leave the multidirectional powerfucking to kai or something

and being orderly to xiumin

another rug could have been knitted my friends 

moving on dot org

so, you both figure to take it easier and try to go with something he usually does in passing. you know, turning a typical baekhyun habit into something you can try out casually in bed so he can tease you.

that one should work out right?

proceed: teeth action. you seated, him positioning himself above you. after your approval baekhyun pulls your hair back to expose your neck — so he can deliciously bite into it (or so was the plan). 

reality: his hand gets tangled up completely. 

while he’s busy nibbling and giggling about like a lil’ bunny chomping at a carrot that turns out to be extremely ticklish herself. 

in fact, you start squeaking out a wonky high pitch, startling baekhyun’s fine musical ear to the bone by the obvious atonality. did she just try to outsing my vocal range with a creaking whistle note? 

mariah carey would cancel you on twitter over this one

that’s how you turn a vicious, possessive bite into an eternal meme

every time either of you go for a neck kiss, you end up imitating each other. baekhyun has immortalized himself as a nervous chomping bunny and you as the vocalist anti-christ

lord have mercy

you miss your old sex life already and it’s only been two hours

cause you see... if baekhyun gives you the chance to bite him? he needs a set of long sleeves, scarves, and an extra soft pillow to sit down on for the next two days

like, no mercy bitch

you get right down to business and ravage him and do it properly until he cums in his pants

sure, the way he uses his tongue now is definitely kinda hot mind you

baekhyun is always good with his singing equipment that doesn’t suddenly change aye

and you keep your eyes closed

but with time you notice that he starts drooling and whimpering. baekhyun’s wet mouth is out there betraying him, huh.

same with your body. your reactions give you away, body language just won’t lie. you have a damn hard time staying still. you wanna do something, you wanna touch and guide baekhyun all over.

and vice versa baekhyun keeps on glitching and doing the same thing he really became a living tumblr gif now

this whole session is just so confusing and laced with all these moments of awkwardness it’s really telling you something about yourself and mister pinky toe’s ideal dynamic

baekhyun can’t even get himself to even lightly slap you properly. and when he does, his delicate hands are just so cute. it’s as if legolas came along, scented in jasmine, elegant and fabulous like it’s a l’oreal commercial

he immediately looks concerned after he manages to do it cleanly and you admit it wasn’t really that exciting a feeling yourself. it felt more like, “um ouch, and?”

needless to say, you’re weirded out if anything, baekhyun smacking and dragging you around as a cold-as-ice dom is just a strange thing to do for both of you 

like even exo’s wolf era fashion was more coherent than this carrot fuckery

and those were some of the most intense turtlenecks ever 

is there really nothing dominant baekhyun can pull off. come on he’s the genius idol 

actually 

there’s something that does work out for once

because no rule without exceptions indeed

because hey, you can learn something anyway, it’s the whole point of you going through a list of things to try as a couple

baekhyun is good at doing the more hardcore, faster kind of fingering. who would have thought, totally surprising, revolutionary i know. but that’s where you’re both agreeing hey, there’s some untapped potential you can use for the steamier evenings you have going. 

cuz wow, he can get you off with flying colors. 

...only to succumb to a malfunctioning bobohu wrist 

even baekhyun’s boner for your legs in latex isn’t that stiff

it’s another pause until his hand loosens up again

this poor man just can’t win

and if you’re asking oi hard domming isn’t the only thing you can do

baekhyun trying to summon his inner soft dom: surprise, same old tale. here we go again.

your boyfriend thinks he generally looks way too puppy-like to be your big ole buff daddy taking care of you. oversized sweater, fluffy hair and all. 

you say to him well, it’s not that doms can’t wear casual things. but it’s true that you have to feel your role and find yourself believable. regardless of your looks, in fact. 

unless your partner really enjoys you dressing up as some kind of dominant hyper-archetype? looking the part is relatively unimportant if you’re absolutely made for dominance you say

pretty eye-opening moment for him

in your roleplay, he caresses and kisses you to the point, he can approach and lead you to do this or that position, don’t be mistaken. and he’s good at making presents, he’s indulging you perfectly well and actually likes doing it. but... it still ends up being more vanilla than not a few hours in. the d/s is out the door almost automatically the longer you do it.

at the end, it leaves you with a feeling of “but err, what now? give the maid outfit to charity?” 

baekhyun rubs his neck in search for something else to do, both of you staring at each other with expressions blanker than kyungsoo when a prancing chanyeol is acting up.

how did the quote go again. if you scramble for inspiration, let it be?

it’s exactly that situation when baekhyun soft doms. he can hold you tight and do his thing for a while, but the chemistry of your roles is dwindling into a question mark.

in fact. there’s an uneasy silence as if great mother suho was sitting right beside you critiquing baekhyun’s sugar daddy skills

baekhyun is rich like a motherfucker and can’t even call you ‘my innocent lil’ baby girl’ without looking like he just learned a first grade tonguetwister by heart

you did play your parts with less cracking up, but you clearly tell him that there’s still something strangely clueless and “ah, awkward” (baekhyun’s verdict in response, verbatim) in between the two of you. 

when you take care of baekhyun and tuck him in, you hardly run out of ideas. it just goes on and on. even when you played through an entire scene, you both come up with things to extend the scenario because it’s so much fun. you make him a hot chocolate, massage his feet, brush his hair, do some extra light bondage with a silk ribbon around his ankles to make him feel pretty, feed him pizza, have him cuddle up in your lap, pinch his ass, and do some rimming if he’s feeling a bit hornier. 

the spoiling is nice at the start, but there’s something missing. you want to lead his hands and really treat him, and do it all the time, and baekhyun really finds himself craving it as well. 

baekhyun soft domming quickly turns into — well just normal loving makeouts and gestures. you kiss and touch, there’s nothing hierarchical about it, nothing mega juicy or exciting.

you just don’t get into the groove, you know. there’s nothing particular happening if you try to get into those roles. it doesn’t titillate both of you for an extended period of time, it doesn’t make you curious for more. it’s like... shrug. what about it. 

when you usually dominate, you know something hits home when you think about it all day. baekhyun screaming and crying with his legs twitching pops up whenever you close your freaking eyes goddamn.

you make a note to observe whether you’re going about your daily business thinking about how you could be his innocent good girl. following his every whim, making big eyes at him or something. 

result: more shaky, ruined baekhyun moaning his soul out in the highest of notes and leaking cum everywhere from getting choked and his face sat on. 

daddy baekhyun has simply not crossed your mind. in fact, poor guy no chance to fit in there from the get-go. his particularly whorish, extra subby counterpart is all over your brain cells with his tongue out. and you’re very tempted to grab it between your thumb and index and spit in his mouth for some very good measure. maybe cum in it as well.

um. so there’s that. the more you know.

baekhyun figures as much himself and you try the other side of the equation. oh, oh. here comes hard dom baekhyun.

who gets you on your knees and starts a wild deepthroat session while calling you names. that’s all well and good... nope. your gag reflex decides to yeet some weird coughing facial expressions and reflex cock bites at poor baekhyun who doesn’t know what’s happening. to finish him off completely, you sneeze while having a hiccup and his dick slips out. 

... you both safeword at the same time.

that cleanup has scarred you both for life. what the everloving fuck. no more impulse throatfucking in this pure christian household, then. 

you’ll stick to lazy, twirling, indulgent blowjobs and the usual ruined orgasms for him — the actually planned ones, jesus christ.

like seriously. you invented a whole new language with those confused gargling noises and that wasn’t french, it was advanced level klingon. baekhyun repeats asking if you’re okay and you’re still stuck realizing oh hell, that was not pretty. off the bucket list, you like sucking him off but this style just doesn’t come natural to you. 

the popsicles you could train yourself with are usually gone from the freezer within a day after getting the groceries. baekhyun is wholeheartedly addicted to them. 

he loves cheating on his diet since you told him his fully cheeks are your emotional support squish and kiss pillows, so.

baekhyun rightfully insists he’s better at eating pussy the wild way in the first place — and that you have no business choking on his dick like you’re on hot ones eating the world’s spiciest whatever is trending now.

or actually... baekhyun’s dick can’t be compared to a chili pepper if we’re doing a choking analogy alright. that just doesn’t fit his promotion concept. cinnamon stick is more like it.

ever saw one of these terrible cinnamon spoon videos where reckless people try to defeat god by— anyway, you’ve seen them. that’s how you looked like trying to get your mouth fucked. i think god would actually be defeated by how far away from divine elegance that was and you’re so sorry for subjecting baekhyun to this artless display. 

cinnamon is still best used in small doses. say, for garnishing a creamy cake or pie y’know. 

anyway. you dished up the most butchered attempt at sexy gagging in history and so, baekhyun will preach for days how he’s the one chosen by fate to push down seven big fat inches of your strap still half asleep without even blinking. 

... and that his world-class operatic breath control would probably enable him to bury his face in your pussy on mount everest. baekhyun knows that every domme would sell her soul to get a sub as skilled with breathing as him.

...and that he has the official copyright for giving quality slobbery oral with quality smudged tears. as he will demonstrate to you almost daily from then on. king of messy head and going stupid with the tongue acrobatics. ugh, the noises are amazing, too. give him a grammy for his oral sounds.

gotta leave the heavy-duty work to the experts innit.

at dinner, he also poutingly brags how he can make his spit run out of his nose while he’s sucking himself through your entire dildo collection. and blow spit bubbles. and snort his own semen off his thighs and let it drop off his tongue if he’s in a particularly slutty mood. or a creampie. jeez, baekhyun, the wolf of wallstreet is strong in him. you literally have to stop him from showing off because “hey boy, i already know! i’ve seen it last week bro it was good!”

needless to say he’s talking in essays all day because he wants things go back to normal and he doesn’t have to ask twice.

for real, your candy man with the cinnamon stick has been suffering from the love bites and has to retire his cock for two days from the bruising. 

mind you. the pain he can deal with. that ain’t the problem. by all means, man. he’s a fucking masochist. 

it’s actually more like... submissive you has deactivated his boner and he can’t help it. it’s not you that makes him limp, it’s more like, the klingon choking and the ton of mishaps that just don’t sit right. 

baekhyun feels bad about not doing well enough to make both of you have a good time as well which is lowkey heartbreaking. you have to cheer him up with ‘now repeat after me: stupid, slutty bitch’ jokes to make him chuckle at least a bit.

cuz you gotta understand, baekhyun is very ambitious to develop his talents in all areas of life. if there’s a skill he gets stuck with and he can’t work with his potential, that’s so unusual to him.

and you say man, imagine if you were some kind of uber-talented dom. that’d still not make me sneeze any less.

if you dominate him, it feels easy to do. nothing can really ruin the mood, not even when the lube runs out (baekhyun drools enough to make anything slippery okay). 

except maybe when xiumin rings on landline because he left his favorite fluffy sweater in the subway and needs to vent about it. my god that’s such a tear-jerking story i’m close to sobbing. this shit could kill literally any boner.

or when your hand cramps up after shoving your fingers down his throat and in his ass for like half an hour which should be ranked first as the saddest anime betrayal of all time but it’s justifiable and you had a lot of fun beforehand.

in other words. only the things outside of your control tend to mess with your femdom business. in and of itself, nothing can kill your vibe except a dying battery obviously. 

whereas you trying submission oddly spoils the atmosphere from the inside out and provides a free cringe compilation. like without even doing much, it happens automatically. 

baekhyun relishes in dramatically recounting how you both looked like true clowns attempting a rendition of overexpensive, extra tangly contemporary art bondage. hell, not even employed clowns, completely retired ones, struggling to regain their tightrope tricks from summer 1912 when harry houdini was still hot shit in town. 

you say oh god, that wasn’t even worth a retired clown’s skillset, clowns work damn hard man. you’d be hardpressed to find any circus artist capable of cracking a whip onto themselves baekhyun-style and moaning out loud because it was this good. seriously. that was one for the books.

if baekhyun tried to set foot in some willy-nilly maledom porn, he’d be capable of firing himself on the first day. 

at the end, you just have a good laugh, man. you agree — hey, this ain’t it, but it’s good to know at least. tried and tested, been there, done that. self-whipping and carrot-nibbling and blowjob hiccups.

if you’re both so hopeless and living up to the challenge managed to upset poor mariah carey instead of giving you a hot and steamy time, you very well know where you belong. that’s a good feeling. assuring and a confidence boost for your skills. it makes up for all the clumsiness actually. 

exactly because the try-out part was an entire disaster, domming baekhyun will be even more fun, you can’t see it becoming anywhere near boring. it never really was, but now you know where your strong suits are even more so. and — what to avoid, anyway. 

no more unsafe practice and teddy whipping under this roof my friend

and something to incorporate more often which is baekhyun unleashing his very creative, pianoesque fingering skills on you.

you have lots of anecdotes to rile each other up as well. or, at least, tease another a bit. your high note was too legendary not to be remembered.

baekhyun will use all of these things against you in a positive way if you get what i mean. he’ll say how you being so strangely vocal made him realize just how commanding and compelling your sexy time voice is when you tell him how to kneel, how to kiss, how to revere.

and you teasing him how clumsy a dom he is makes baekhyun more self-assured in his subbing abilities. he knows for a fact you’ve not once roasted him about how well he can use his pretty mouth. cuz it’s the real deal. sloppy, skilled, and eager to please. he’s damn right about that.

hitting his toes has ruined baekhyun’s whole career as a dom and he was mad at first but he did realize that beside the clumsiness, subbing just suits him well as a principle

your experience gives you even more anticipation for all the sex you will have in the future. 

you already knew what you both liked. you know it even more now, it’s underlined, it’s a big relieved yes. no more cringey “daddy, daddy, choke me please!” worship. time to make his day and sit on baekhyun’s perfect face to fuck the shit out of it. 

or you know, actually land a whip on his juicy boyfriend thighs and listen to those heavenly loud reactions in a dead-on pitch (he usually moans in C minor).

long story short and cinnamon sticks aside. it’s even more fun now. you just love your cute subby boy just as he is. he doesn’t have to try to be anything else or step up his game. he’s so ideal just doing what he does like a real angel.

more subby stuff: m.list + ao3

↳⎡FINAL NOTE⎦i love writing crack lmao i hope you were rolling on the floor like i did 😂 write me your favorite part in the comments so we can laugh again and buy me a ko-fi if you wanna 👍

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