#you both hold onto naive hopes

[luv-gukkie]

★ little, naive thing ★

pairing: yandere! jeon jungkook x f. reader

genre: fluff || smut || non-idol au || yandere

summary: a small cuddle takes jungkook back down memory lane; a time where he could only admire your pretty-self from afar with a burning need to make you his, an idea your little boyfriend wasn’t so fond of.

word count: +4.8k

tags/warnings: cockwarming, boobie kisses, dom! jungkook, sub!reader, jungkook worships reader, he switches up real fast, size difference, smooches here and there, jungkook manhandles reader, he's possessive, degrading comments, public sex? (don't worry? no one catches them), jungkook gets into a fight, he hurts himself, manipulation, jk lies, talk about marriage ;), degrading comments, jungkook gets a tattoo of..., unprotected sex (don't be silly), reader was his first (for EVERYTHING), he's in love LOVE

notes: hope you enjoy it! i’ll try to post the small writing about yoongi soon :)

༻❤︎︎ ★ ★ ❤︎︎༺

"no, no, no, no!" jungkook yells with a small smile as his hands covered his face, acting as if he was sad. you sing out a little chant, sticking your tongue out at him. he can't help but hide his laugh at your taunts and the small dance you do behind his hands. you're so cute, jungkook thinks as he stares at you through the gap between his fingers. the playback of your pink character, cat peach, flashes through the television screen as it shows her first through the finish line seconds before tanooki mario, jungkook's character, crosses through it as well. he groans in pain, "i was so close." he can't believe how good you've gotten at mario kart 8. it's unbelievable how fast you've learned. "wanna know my secret?" you whisper softly as if there were people around you; even though both of you are alone in your shared apartment, with the only witnesses being bam, the big and strong doberman, and cinnabon, your cute, tiny bunny. the pair lay together (similar to jungkook and you) on bam's huge bed, cuddled into each other, hiding behind their floppy ears. with the same mischievous tone, jungkook whispers back, "i have to know." you smile before leaning in closer to his ear and before he knows it, he's backing away, tricked and played. jungkook covers his ear, recovering from your surprise shriek. you giggle at his reaction before going in to leave kisses on his face all around. "sorry", you giggle as he "tries" to get away from you, but it's impossible because you two sit together squished on a bean bag.

as he sees you laugh, memories with you flash through his mind. it takes him back to the start of his love to you; all the way in high school.

jungkook has never been social to begin with. he's always been a little timid and shy compared to others, but it didn't meant he couldn't experience the same things others his age were experiencing. puberty had hit him hard. jungkook had grown too fast over the heat of summer. his voice was no longer of a teenage boy, but one of a grown man. the change into manhood had girls confessing their admiration to him left and right, but he's never been too interested in starting a relationship in the first place. it's not until he landed his eyes onto dainty, little you.

jungkook remembers it was the first day of sophomore year, the summer had tanned him a bit from being a life guard at the public pool and he had grown his muscles. jungkook's eyes wandered around the new classroom, recognizing everyone's faces, but stammering at an almost unrecognizable face. the reddish lipgloss you wear shines on your plump lips, a slight blush on your cheeks and your eyelashes have darkened with mascara. it's clear that he's not the only one who's changed over the summer. your hair is styled perfectly with a nice hairstyle that makes it even cuter. but it's the glimmer in your eyes that attract him the most especially with that faint, flirtatious smile you put on as you smile at the boy who holds your hand. the realization hits jungkook, why the fuck are you holding that boy's hands? that boy probably didn't even know you existed last year so why were you giving him such a lovely look? he thinks he's been staring too long when the guy turns around to glare at him and sticks his middle finger out when you turn around to talk to your friend.

shit.

it would've been a whatever to jungkook, but now, he keeps seeing you everywhere since he's noticed you. and it's not fair that your fucking boyfriend follows you everywhere you go, always in your shadow and never not. and it's like your boyfriend feels notices the glances he throws at you and sends him nasty glares whenever he gets the chance. jungkook fucking hates his ass. hates how he's gotten obsessive over you when he barely knows you; when you don't even know him. he doesn't like the feeling really, but he can't ignore it either so he does everything he can to get the little lovebirds to separate for his sake. eventually a small little rumor breaks things apart and he can't help the little smile that breaks free when the gossip he started reaches his ears. its times like this when jungkook is thankful to the loudmouths his classmates have. and it's like the heavens heard of his prayers when in no time, he had you in his grasp for life.

you don't even find out about jungkook being hurt until your lunch time. the whispers of jungkook's name are loud and seem true enough that you dash out when you hear a short version of the story. you're over the top worried for jungkook. your heart hurts, your eyes are blurring up and sweat is building up on your forehead as you get nearer to the nurse's office. when you find him sitting with a bandages across his arms and hand, fists bloodied and his nose still slightly dripping with blood. and even as the dark bruises are hurting him, red running down his nose and his arms onto the once white bandages, he runs to you with a call of your name and a helpless expression on his face. you let out a painful sob at his delicate form, "jungkookie, this is all my fault. i'm so sorry, you shouldn't be like this." jungkook doesn't deny your claims, tearing into your neck as his arms hug your waist in a tight embrace. you promise to take care of him and you do by spending every single second next to him, making sure he's not hurting. not noticing the sly smile he had on each time you turned around because of how his dumb little girlfriend didn't realize the blood on him wasn't his, but of your ex-boyfriend.

you ignore your ex. can't stand thinking about that stupid idiot, much less seeing him so you make a clear decision to avoid him or anything that has to do with him. sharing your decision with your friends so that they don't even speak of his existence. your blood boils at the fact that he dared to throw insults and then hurt jungkook, provoking you further. unbeknownst to you, your ex-boyfriend was stuck spending his time in the hospital. so it comes to your surprise when you do see him, his arm is in a cast along with his nose covered in white with bruises surrounding it. he's practically limping with each step he takes. when you two make eye contact, your eyes fidget to your phone to tried to avoid him. ignorance that's made harder when he decides to call after you. you're firm as you continue walking but turn around soon after, when you hear the crutches hitting the floor behind each step you take. he whispers about how you should leave jungkook; that there's something wrong with him. but the annoyed look you give him tells him you won't. "leave me alone," is the only thing you utter and before you know it, he's taking your hand as your about to leave and leaning in closer. "___, he's fucking crazy." the terrified look in his eyes is more than enough to scare you, but you're distracted when your eyes spot jungkook's pained ones.

you don’t hesitate to run after jungkook, leaving your ex behind in a hopeless state. you're not able to catch up, but following the sound of his footsteps is good enough to lead you to the back of the school. "jungkook?" you shout for him, wondering where he was. "why are you fucking talking to him?" his harsh tone has you in a ruined state in no time. jungkook has never talked to you in such a way, your mind tells you it's all your fault he's like this. you go to hug him, but all he does is move back and you notice that the tears in his eyes are gone.

jungkook doesn't like what he saw at all. all your words are nothing to him right now; all he feels is anger and jealousy in him. "talking to that piece of shit after he talked bad about you, after he fucking attacked me." he gulps before continuing with a lower tone, "baby, is there absolutely nothing in that pretty little head of yours? you let him hold your hand even after everything. you let him touch what doesn't belong to him." you're crying at this point, telling jungkook that it meant nothing and you only have eyes for him. it's in that moment a light bulb goes on in his head; he's got you right where he wants you. "prove it." his demand confuses you, a small "how?" leaves your lips. you follow his gaze before realizing what he wanted. "will you forgive me?" you question, the hope evident in your mellow tone. "of course, baby." you're about to get down on your knees before he stops you, "nuh uh, pretty," his fingers playing around with the necklace he gave you, "it's something else that i want. c'mon you got this, put two and two together." a mocking tone as he talks to you in a childlike manner. it's in that moment that you realize where both of you still are: school. you don't know how the information left your head, but you shake your head at jungkook. "we're still at school kook, anyone could see us and we could get in trouble." you speak softly, hoping he agrees with you. your palms feel sweaty at his request. it's like a switch-up when he stays quiet for a while, different to how he acted minutes ago but you don't notice. you watch as his bandaged hand tugs a couple of hairs behind your ear.

jungkook wipes his nose with the same bandaged fist that's covered in blood and his bangs slightly reveal the dark purple bruise on his forehead. "please." he begs with a soft voice and with his pretty eyes, you're convinced enough. you just can't deny him, especially after he fought for you; because of you. jungkook got hurt to protect you from that idiot you once called your boyfriend, and you can't help but blame yourself for it. jungkook ruined his reputation for a stupid fight. it's all your fault, so you let him get closer to you. you let him back you up into the hidden corner outside of the school. you wrap your small hands around his neck and let him kiss you. jungkook pushes you into him, his tongue is quick to explore your own. his saliva drips onto your lips and leaves it all messy. his fingers go to unbutton your white button shirt, undoing the blue collar. "you're so pretty, ___." he whines as he licks up your neck in a hurry and sucks it with need until pinkish skin is shown and teeth marks are left. it doesn't help him that the school uniform looks so good on you. the thigh high blue socks the schools requires only feeds on to his desires. and to top it off, you have to wear a blue (mini-looking) skirt with the basically transparent button shirt. and he can't forget the little decorations that you add on, which only fuels his fantasy to have you under him. a little red bow you add on to your hair and the jewelry you add on to your wrist and neck. especially the one that's wrapped around your neck, a sparkling j in the center.

a clear memory goes through jungkook when he raises the skirt he loves on you because it's not the first time he's gotten a peak at what you hide under that skirt; he's seen it multiple times, even before you two started going out but you don't have to know that. he knows he shouldn't have looked, but you wouldn't have minded. would you? either way, he couldn't help it. jungkook's eyes wandered when he was around you. he would ignore the arm that wrapped around your waist (the douche bag you called your boyfriend) and stare hard as fantasies played in his head. he loves the way your tits are so tight in that stupid shirt. he knows he's a pervert for gawking so hard at your ass when you walk pass him, or sometimes taking a peek at what hides underneath. but, he also wished that it was him that was hugging you and kissing you. it would be his dream come true. and maybe, it was just his luck when he saw your panties as you tripped on some rubbish on the ground. thinking that no one was around, you stayed on the ground for a while; whimpering in pain, knees scraped and legs apart, giving jungkook the perfect view of your covered pussy. you didn't wear shorts underneath your skirt, it's like you wanted him to see you in such an intimate way. he swore he felt drool falling out of the corners of his mouth at the sight. he couldn't stop staring (and definitely couldn't forget) at how your body was spread apart on the ground. jungkook doesn't remember how long he stood there before coming to help you, meanwhile trying to hide the hard-on that was growing in frustration. jungkook definitely had luck on his side that day, because soon after, both of you would start to hang out more. it was enough time to indulge your mind and heart.

when you both started dating, you both sat next to each other in almost all your classes. you let his hands play with the trim of your skirt and caress your upper thigh whenever he wanted. ignoring how each time his fingers inched closer to your panties. you were so nice to him. whenever you bent over the slightest, your skirt was basically hanging off your hips, revealing your cute little panties. and now he gets to see them all over again. "shit," he groans at the ache in his cock. you were so enticing with your white panties and the little bow right on the center that he'll never get tired of. but jungkook's too desperate, so he is quick to tug down the flimsy material. quickly choosing to hide it away in his pockets. breath stuttering at your bare, wet cunt. "___, you're so fucking pretty." his finger slides against your slit, immediately getting soaked. his thumb is quick to follow towards your clit, pinching and teasing it until he hears you start to whimper. he turns to you around to place a messy kiss on your lips, tongue dipping in to touch your own as he takes off his pants desperately. his cock is bulging and has left a mess in his boxers, but he pushes it down.

a sigh leaves his lips when his cock stands straight, hitting his abdomen. you don't even get a look before he turns you again and bends you against the brick wall. you feel your heart pound in your chest. "kookie, anyone could find us," you stutter out, a small glob escaping your gaping hole. 'cute', is all he thinks before pressing his hot cock head against your cunt. "shit baby, i have to bend my knees to reach you," he snickers out loud. he can't help the grin that escapes him out of the realization; you're so small compared to him. his shadow completely covers you under him, his hands are huge compared to yours and he can carry you like you're nothing. he's about to press in when you ask if he has a condom. it makes jungkook remember his trip to the pharmacy days before, staring at the pack of condoms he was going to take as he left the store. it brings back the sick pleasure he had then, the need to fuck you raw and full of him. he stands back to his full stature as he softly whispers an apology that he didn't have a single one. he feels slightly angered at the silence you give him, but you wouldn't know because you face the other way. "s' okay kookie i guess." he taunts you in his head, annoyed that you had him standing with a hard cock like an idiot just to ask him for stupid things.

it's already a painful feeling as he pumps his cock. the slit on his tip has precum dribble out. so in return he chooses not to bend down to your height. his hands grip harder onto your hips, the pressure causing you to fuss and arch your back in response. a shriek of his name and a desperate attempt to hold onto the wall distracts you as he lifts you up to the height of his hips by wrapping one arm around your stomach. his other hand directs his drooling cock head into your pussy. as he forces his dick in, your mouth widens as a silent moan escapes you. the tip of his cock is thick and hot. you can hear him pant heavily, calling you sweet names as he watches with heavy eyes as he keeps pushing in until his hips meet your own and the tip shoves right up against your womb.

you can feel tears in your eyes at the way his fat cock is nestled deep inside your cunt. the veins that run down him are perfect and his length excites you. jungkook curses silently as he sees his cock getting drenched off the globs of your slimy slick. he's speechless on how good your pussy feels, surprised he's not busting a nut so far. all he knows is that he'd get on his knees over and over to get just a look at your cunt. it doesn't help that you're practically hanging off his cock, back bending so beautifully to reach him, while your tits are begging to spill out your half-opened shirt. it makes him smug knowing that you could fall if he simply let go of your hips. your legs are dangling mid-air as he fucks you deep and slow for the couple first thrusts before completely switching into a different pace. he feels heavy inside your cunt. all you can think about is him, each time jungkook rams his cock head directly into your sweet spot.

your tiny mouth lets out the dirtiest sultry noises he's ever heard. you sob about how his cock is too big. "kookie," you wail as his cock easily pokes and pushes against your sweet spot and cervix at the same time. you feel the heat from his angry tip that oozes out more chunks of precum, reminding you that he isn't wearing a condom. but you're left dumb with your eyes rolled back when his fingers tease your bud in a hurried pace. jungkook feels your walls squeeze tight on him and it causes a throaty groan to leave his lips. "wet my cock, my pretty baby" he mutters. you shake as jungkook continues stretching your pussy hole out. and with an airless moan, you squirt your juices on his abdomen and the base of his cock. his eyes fill with curiosity at the wetness he feels leak all down his cock and thighs. "s-so perfect for me. little hole gonna be gaping when i leave it. gonna stuff you full of me, isn't that want you want? my little dumb girlfriend wants me to fill her with my cum." jungkook can't help but moan at how your pussy swallows him whole, accepting every inch of him in your hot walls even if he's bigger than you can handle. "gonna be my cock sleeve, perfect for it. wet, little cunt s' clenching around me like a bitch in heat."

he feels the heat crawl up to his face, and it doesn't help that the sweat on his forehead makes his hair stick to his face. he smells your perfume as it begins to stick on him and he fucking loves it. loves that he can grab a full fist of your hair and the only thing you'll do is cry out his name and wet his cock over and over as he goes faster. jungkook leans down to place sloppy kisses down your back, nearing your ear to whisper dirty words that have your cunt clenching tighter around him. the moans you let loose are loud and messy, forgetting your still in school. "people should see how good my baby takes cock, can't compare with no one else, right?" a question you don't answer, or can barely make out with how loud your ass smacks against him. "pussy so filthy and tight, ready to take my cock at anytime and anywhere." you're about to release all over again when jungkook stops to slowly pull back his hips. you whine in frustration, but soon forget when he drags his cock back into your cunt, making sure you feel each vein and curve.

the breathy whines you let out almost drown out the lewd squelches of the bottom of his shaft meeting your bare pussy. jungkook can't hold back the huff, "oh, fuck yes. cute cunt leaking just for me, sucking me right back in," his jaw clenches at how wet you are. each time he sank further, his pace began to pick up with an impatient desire to fuck you harder. "my good girlfriend, s' pretty when she's desperate for cock, my cock." he says mockingly.

"i'm gonna cum," you gasp out with each word. jungkook's fingers make their way to your lips, passing them to reach your tongue. "me too," is all he says before pulling out once more to turn you around and place you right back on his cock. "you look s' fucked out, baby," he whispers with a smug smile on his face, "pussy gonna be nice and stuffed with my cum, yeah?" he's quick to connect your lips together as you squirt from the overstimulation, hiding his desperate groans. you feel his cock spill warm loads of his cum inside you. small curses coming out of his mouth as he continues to runt against you, slobs of cum still leaking into you. you moan at the globs of cum slide down your inner thighs and onto the ground. his voice is soft when he talks to you and carefully holds you onto him. "you're so good to me; my good girlfriend, yeah?" he ignores the way you trace his dark bruises and brushes your hair out. he'll never let that stupid fuck get close to you again. it's not that he's scared of him, but rather of what nonsense he's gonna say. it's best if you don't know that jungkook started the fight, that he went home and hurt himself to make the bruises etched into his skin; smacking his head against the wall until he bled and couldn't think of anything but you and slammed one of his dad's metal tools against his hands to have you next to him, cause jungkook would really do anything for you.

"jungkook, what are you thinking about?" your voice breaks him out of train of thought, "about us." he responds without hesitation, because really, when is he not. his hands rub your waist, slowly taking you onto his lap. you smile at him and it's like he's in love all over again with you. and he hopes you feel the same as he takes his left hand into yours, "i want us to be together forever, ___." you watch the way his doe eyes show you all the love he has for you. you're lucky you've always had jungkook be this affectionate. he's always willing to take you out to a restaurant on late nights, picnics almost every week during the summer, and it's always refreshing to be with him. never once has he failed you, so you can't help the heart-warming feeling in you right now, watching a smile break through his face when you agree with him. "i've loved you from the very start, and i can't wait until we start a new chapter together," he pauses for a while, holding you tighter against his chest, "and you know that i've always wanted to put a ring on your finger, and if you're ready, i'll be more than happy to give you any ring you want." your lips find their way to his as you kiss him with everything you have, "i love you jungkook."

he doesn't even have a chance to respond before you're kissing him again, because you know that he does love you. it's in his eyes; his smile; in everything he does. you're shown love through every gesture he does, like the tattoo he surprised you with last week. big, pretty letters that are deeply inked into the skin of his chest for eternity. these pretty letters that make your name and are surrounded by the soft-feathered wings of beautiful angels. his tattooed hands dig into your hips, angling you on top of his hardened cock. his hand grabbing your jaw, squishing your cheeks and lips as you move your loose shorts to the side. with a harsh tug, jungkook's sweatpants end up at his knees. there's a big pearl of precum on his head, slightly leaking down his base. at the sight, you feel your cunt pulse. jungkook's hands massage your ass as he makes his way back up to unclip your bra. jungkook pumps his cock with your hands, cooing at how small they are. he pushes himself inside your swollen cunt, and it's hard to control himself when your tiny cunt violently clamps around his thick base, taking all of him in. you're moaning desperately into his ear distracting him from your painted nails leaving deep red marks on his abdomen. his lips wrap themselves around you tits, leaving trails of saliva behind before kissing the spots.

"faster, kookie," you cry out as you feel your orgasm at the pit of your stomach. your ass repeatedly meets his pelvis with a burning pain. you're begging for release when his thumb plays with your nub and his mouth is sucking your tits. "little hole dripping all around me, ain't that right baby," a shaky gasp he lets out while his cock makes you reach your high. tears roll down your cheeks at the overstimulation when he grinds himself into your sopping cunt. "gonna make a mess in this pussy," he groans before shoving his warm load deep inside your sore cunt. a little gasp escapes your mouth at how stuffed your tummy is.

just as your hands begin to slide off his shoulders, ready to fix yourself up, jungkook pulls you in close enough that your chest is touching his. you can't even speak when he begins to softly pound into your spent pussy which has you whimpering. there's a cocky grin on his face that you want to wipe off, but it's hard when your oversensitivity makes you weak. with a faint call of his name, jungkook finally halts his sensual motions with a replaced giddy smile, "i love having you in my arms."

as the minutes past, he takes note of your sleepy head dozing off into his neck. jungkook envelopes you into a cozy cuddle as he watches the blarring tv whilst his racing mind drags on with repeated memories of the past; haunting reminders that should never be brought up. he digs his head into your hair, fingers gently kneading into your scalp making his beating heart calm its pace. everything he's done was for you. the thing is jungkook can't limit himself when he's around you. it's a suffocating feeling that indulges every ounce of his body. it fills him with a need to protect you, and it makes him go mad in the head sometimes. it causes him to commit foolish acts of violence against those who he thinks have a role in your life. though, he's gotten better with the persistent idea of becoming a better man for you; a better future husband; a better future father. jungkook's lips turn up at the ends at the sleepy noises you make. "i love you."

[theonevoice]

Have a gold star...

I swear, I started this as a wholesome innocent comment on how when Crowley has to think of a prize, after 6000+ years, his sweet head still goes to stars as the ultimate symbol of something beautiful and cherished.

But then I was struck by something: sarcasm.

Both times, when he tells someone to "have a gold star," he doesn't say it with a tone of affectionate irony, like the cool-but-sweet uncle with a rough personality but a soft heart. He says it with a tone of bitter sarcasm, of painful disenchantment.

Because it's not a prize that he is offering; it's a sop, a cruel joke-gift, something that will get you excited at first just because you have a stupid, naive, innocent soul, and you will later realize that it means nothing to the one who assigned it to you, and that they are ready to take it away whenever they want, while the rest of the world laughs at your ridiculous gullibility.

Because this is what stars were for him.

They were his beloved, exciting creation. The star-factory nebula was his cherished task, assigned to him by God, and he believed that it was meant to be a thing of beauty and splendor, and hold value in the grand scheme of the universe... only to discover, immediately after he created it, that it was never intended to have any value at all. It meant nothing to God. It wasn't even planned to last enough to fullfill its purpose. It was a joke, a cruel prank. 

The stars were God's bad pun of giving angel!Crowley something to do, and love, and have hope and expectations for, and then taking it away. Revealing that it was just a shiny piece of gold cardstock that only a simpleton could consider valuable. Of course he can only say "have a gold star" as a dry snarky sarcastic comment on someone who thinks they have achieved something meaningful when it's actually nothing. Be it the Them defeating the Four Horsemen. Be it Muriel being noticed by the Metatron.

Great, sure, have a gold star, be all excited and squealing with happiness, it will turn into ashes before you even know it.

I am not sure that Crowley's snake eyes were ever intended to signal that he cannot see the stars because snakes have bad vision (even ignoring the zoological fact that they are sensitive to UV light though, so they should still see astronomical objects, in the book it says that demons must be able to see at night, and that's why Crowley doesn't need to turn on the lights on the Bentley), but for sure the Fall and Heaven's cruelty has ruined the stars for him, in a way.

Now, in his mind, they are the ultimate symbol of delusion, of naivety, of foolishly investing your love and passion and hopes in something, of stupidly ignoring that the things you cherish will be ruined or taken away from you or leave you on their own accord.

That's also why Aziraphale's "nothing lasts forever" cuts him so deep. That's why his "no... no, I dont' suppose it does" sounds so much like a truth that he is remembering instead of one that he has jsut discovered.

Here you go, you did it again, you thought you had something significant and instead it was just like your stars, you should have known that whenever you find something beautiful it's just a matter of time before you lose it, you shouldn't get too attached.

In s1e6 he says it to the Them, in s2e6 he says it to Muriel. I do hope that in s3e6 he will get the chance to say it again, but this time it will be honest and out of joy, because whatever is going to happen will make him able again to believe that you can be happy, and can hold onto the good things that you love. You can have all the gold stars, for real. They don't always have to disappear and leave you in pain. They can stay with you.

[satoruscursedbandages]

୨ . ࣪ Deal . ﹚ 🍙 !

MENTIONS — NSFW VER, FTM!Reader, jealous Toji, mentions of Cunt/Pussy!, name calling(slut,whore,etc), degradation, Bleeding(from biting nothing serious!), Teasing/Taunting, Tummy bulge, cream pie, scratching, rough fucking.

i think i write about him a little too much..oopsies!

─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

“I’d never approve of anyone touching ya’, holding ya’ or being as close to ya’ as I ‘m right now.” Toji spoke in a deep tone, he seemed a bit upset. You just came home 10 minutes ago from a party with your friends, co workers. But Toji knew this one ‘friend’ of yours liked you but you were too naive not to think anything of it, you smelt just like that other guy and it drove him crazy. He knew you would never cheat on him that you would never betray his trust, he treated you amazingly..better than any man, woman, or person could. “I should fuckin’ kill that man. I don’t wan’ you hangin’ out wit’ him again.” He told you looking you dead in the eye, he was clearly jealous and he had every right to be.. another man trying to steal Toji’s man away from him? Unacceptable.

“Toji, it’s not like that I swear..“, you tried to protest but he interrupted you speaking once more, “I know you’d never do such’a thing. I just don’t that motha’fucker near you. You fuckin’ smell like him n’ that’s drivin’ me ma—“ you cut his long rambling of jealously off with a kiss, a slow deep passionate kiss hoping to ease him a little, and it worked. Toji had slipped his hand under your shirt harshly and firmly grabbing onto your waist pulling you closer to him as his other large hand rested on the side of your face. Toji kept his eyes open as he looked at you through out the kiss..he couldn’t take his eyes off of you, he may have been angry at the moment but that doesn’t change the fact he still loves you and views you as his.

The kiss quickly ended with the both of you slightly panting, you looked up at him noticing the look he had in his eyes. Was he upset?..no..was he weirded out?..absolutely not. He looked completely aroused and looked like he was about to take you in the fuckin’ kitchen. “Hey..what’s with that look Toji?” You asked him with a bit of concern in your tone..that sense of concerned washed away when he suddenly kissed you again, pinning your back up against the counter and spreading your legs open. He stood in between them pressing his slight hard on against your clothed cunt, the energy in the room was soon to be replaced with lust and desire. He wanted to teach you a lesson. A lesson not to hang out with that co-worker with the title of your ‘friend’. He wanted you to lose to ability to walk just so you wouldn’t attend work, he didn’t want you near that man ever again.

Toji stopped the kiss once more to say, “Don’t..fuck with’m. ‘M bein’ serious. Don’t fuckin’ talk to that guy again. I’ll even help ya’ look for a different job just..don’t go near him.” He quickly smushed his lips onto yours kissing you, again. And again. He didn’t stop, he didn’t care if you were struggling to breathe he made sure there were no gaps for you both to stop the kiss, he grabbed your face with one of his calloused rough hands and made sure you couldn’t turn away..he continued to kiss you as he rubbed his erection onto your cunt.

Small little moans could be heard out of your mouth as you both kissed, you attempted to push him off but he was too strong, he finally stopped the kiss though so you could breathe..you panted and breathed heavily as strands of saliva were the only thing keeping your lips connected.

Toji gave the most shit eating grin he could give you, you punched him in the chest with a slightly angry look. You weren’t actually angry with him, you could never be angry with him. You just wanted to beat his ass for getting you into such a position..”ya’know baby, I think you need to’b taught a lesson.”

You tried speaking but was in shock from when he suddenly ripped the part of your pants that was covering your cunt, you weren’t wearing any type of undergarments what so ever and that made his cock twitch. “Oh my. So we aren’t wearin’ any panties now are we? Fuckin’ slut.”, “H—hey!! You can’t just— ah..” you whined when he pressed his thumb against your clit, he used your slick to make his thumb slide up and down on your clit with ease. “Sorry huh? Couldn’t hear ya over the sound of yer moans.” He said in a teasing voice, he chuckled.

His thumb was moving in a circular motion, “so wet f’me. You better only be thinking about me and not him. So help me—..”, “I’m not, I—I can only..think about you.” You struggled but managed to get out as he continued to rub your clit. He sighed looking back into your eyes, he softly kissed the center of your forehead and whispered an apology for getting slightly angry but he continued to tease your clit. You squirmed and wiggled around trying to break away from him but Toji leaned forward laying his body on top of yours so you have no means of escape.

You felt his fingers apply more pressure onto your clit as he rubbed faster in’a circular motion, his mouth was latched on your neck as he suck and nibbled on it leaving dark marks such as hickeys and bite marks. He slightly broke skin licking up the blood. “H—Hngh..haah..Mmph..Toojii..” you were softly moaning his name, your legs wrapped around his waist pulling you closer feeling his erection rubbing up against your cunt.

“Shhh. I know baby.” Toji shoved two of his fingers into your mouth making you gag on them, he used his other hand to pull his cock out of his pants placing them in between your wet folds. Rubbing his cock on your cunt having his tip tease your sore clit once more, you placed one of your hands onto his wrist, gripping on to it. You softly nibbled onto his fingers letting out a soft giggle, he continued to thrust his hips as his cock kept moving back and forth slowly..it drove you mad. You needed it inside you, to stretch you out, to fill you up, to fuck you.

“S-Stawp ttweasing..I-I..can’t take it. Please..i-in!..put it n’me..” you whined begging for his cock to pump deep inside you. Toji didn’t utter a word, he was quiet only thing that was heard were his quiet groans, his low husky groans. Music to your fuckin’ ears. “P—pleeeasee…” you kept trying to plead with him but he still wouldn’t budge, he kept teasing you. His cock only rubbing more and more against your wet cunt, making you whine and tear up..you wanted him so bad. So so so bad and he wouldn’t give it to you..such a fuckin’ bully. :(

“Mm. Sorry baby you’re gon’a have t’wait.” Toji let out a soft chuckle, his tip was poking at your hole but he didn’t slid it in, you kept wining and letting our small sobs but he didn’t care. He was teaching you a lesson..you’ll take what he gives you and you wont throw’a fit.

You felt the tip of his cock keep moving in and out, making you shudder and squirm each time it poked at your wet entrance. You wanted more so bad but you knew that wasn’t going to happen. Your juices were leaking onto his cock, he placed your legs over his shoulders as he brought his hands under your shirt squeezing your breasts. He pinched and tugged on your nipples earning a cute moan from you, his lips curled into a devious smile. The state you were in made him laugh, you were a hot fuckin’ mess just waiting to be broken and messed with.

“T—Toji! M’..fuckin’ take..it anymhore..! *sob* Plwease…i—i.. i wan’ *hic* yuu..n’me…” you cried out in between broken moans trying to speak but couldn’t. He knew what he was doing to you, he was going to break you before he fucked you, he liked it like that. You barely being able to speak, going cross eyed, only moaning his name like a dirty slut. He knew you liked it. “Toojjii..s—stawp..givin’..me the..silent..trweatment..” you sniffled looking at him with your big wet eyes, tears rolling down your flushed cheeks. The way you looked at him made his cock twitched, he sighed then finally speaking up, “sorry baby, but ya’ know ‘m not gon’a give in n’ give ya’ what ya’ want. But keep looking at me n’ i just might..do sumthin’.” And with that he squeezed your chest more fondling with your breasts, “but i guess I’d feel bad if i kept seein’ m’ baby cry. So that this like a good boy, ‘kay?” Toji kissed your forehead as he then slowly slid his cock inside your wet pussy, your eyes widened as you screamed out his name. He didn’t stretch you out so it did hurt a bit, but you also liked it..it hurt so fuckin’ bad but it felt so good. You scratched the back of his neck leaving scars that’ll appear tomorrow morning.

“T—Toji!! Tojii!!.. kngh..agh~!..” he let his cock go in all the way before thrusting his hips slowly not wanting to go rough on you right away, you instantly came on his cock, leaving a big fucking mess on it. “My’my..barely put it in just for’ya to instantly make a mess on me? Dirty slut.” He brought a hand to your clit slapping it harshly, you whimpered from the harsh sensation. His cock was slipping in and out slowly with ease, he used your pre as lube since you were already so wet for him. It was easy for him to move his cock in you, his cock was finally all the way in you. A small bulge appeared on your stomach, your shaky hands went to place your hands over it so you could feel him even more. “Damn boy. Yer massaging m’so fuckin’ well. Tight ass fuckin’ pussy.” He grumbled lowly, he began to most a little faster in you as you slowly got comfortable to his length and girth. You let out such lewd moans you guys were probably gonna a noise complaint from your next door neighbors.

“Ffuck.” He groaned out, you were incredibly tight to him, each time he tried to move his cock a little bit out he couldn’t, your tight cunt wouldn’t let him go. “Mmph..haah! Ah, ah!!.. kyaah!!” You kept on moaning not being able to even speak properly you felt like you were in heaven. Who wouldn’t though? His cock was ridiculously fuckin’ big hitting every damn spot in your pussy, any man, woman or person would lose their shit to this. You grabbed the back of his head slowly and weakly pulling him towards you pulling him in for a sloppy messy kiss. It took him by surprise a bit but he didn’t mind, he kissed you back. Just as sloppy as you, shoving his tongue in your throat, sucking on your tongue, biting your lips until they were bruised. You felt a devious smirk curl in his lips once more as he kissed you, you were laid out onto the counter as he fucked you on it, completely forgetting about everything that happened earlier, all of your attention and focus was on him. A few more seconds later you broke the kiss to breathe..you quickly gasped as you felt his cock enter your womb. Toji started fuckin’ you dumb, your eyes rolled to the back of your head as your back arched as much as it could. “That’s m’ boy. Ya’ never disappoint. f..fuckin’ ya’ feel incredible.”

There was another feeling of a knot in your stomach, you needed to come so bad. You needed that release..Toji moved his cock faster hitting every spot in your tight cunt, the way you gripped him made him feel like he was also about to cum. “‘M ‘bouta cum. Shit. A little more.” He pumped himself inside you harder and faster a couple more times. “Ya’ don’t mind if I cream pie you, right? Of course you don’t. That’s what ya’ want, right?” You nodded like a dumbass, barely comprehending what he said you just nod to anything he says, you were drunk on pleasure, drunk on his cock. You moaned and begged him to go faster to not stop, he did exactly that. He was getting closer and closer to his release, his thrusts becoming more rough and faster. “Better take ‘t all baby.” He came inside you, filling you up to the brim. Toji’s warm sticky cum filled up your needy hole, some of it seeped out of your pussy but his cock stayed in as a plug to make sure it all stayed inside. You felt so full..so full of his cum. But you needed more. You wanted to feel him more. You needed to cum more, you wanted more of his cum inside you.

“T—Toji..don’..stawp…p—plwease..f—fill m’ up..im yer slut..d—daddy..” you said in between broken moans, soft little sobs escaping your pretty lips. What you said brought a big ass smile to his fuckin’ face, “ya’ sure that’s what ya’ want?” You nodded quickly and with no hesitation Toji’s cock moved once more inside that tight, cum filled, pussy of yours. He continued to hit every spot like he did previously, only more rough than the last time. He had such a harsh grip on your hips, pounding himself inside you as he moved your hips, using you like a toy. You were his after all, you were such a good boy you could take this. You wanted to be a good boy, his good boy. You wanted to please him..you felt yourself closer and closer to your release..each thrust he did drove you mad, you felt your hips bruising and getting sore from how aggressive he was. You felt yourself cum onto his cock, your cum and his cum mixing together as you both made a big mess on the counter. Your whole body went limp, you were paralyzed by pleasure. You felt so good, your jaw was hung open as your eyes were also closed. Toji held you close to him as he kept on pounding himself deep in you, his tip kissing your cervix. “I need more..yeah. All mine. Yer all fuckin’ mine. Shit.” He whispered lowly into your ear as he did a small growl, he felt like he was about to come again, with the amount of cum inside you, you felt like you could get pregnant with 3 of his kids.

Though that wouldn’t happen since your always made sure to stay on the pill, especially from the amount of times a day he fucks you. You both are like two bunnies fucking like there’s no tomorrow. Just like right now..he’s fucking his dumb slut just the way you want it, you’re like a fuck doll getting fucked but its owner, except you’re real. And he can feel when you try to grip onto his cock. “S’fuckin’ tight..feel like ya’ gon’a knock me out cold wit’ this pussy baby boy.” Toji grunted out, his groans were becoming moans, you could hear his slight desperation of another release. He wanted both of you to orgasm at the same time, “don’ fuckin’ cum till I tell you too.” He ordered you, you listened..you knew better than to not listen to him. “Shit. More..fuck. More. I need more, yeah. Yer mine, all fuckin’ mine. You belong to me. Not that fuckin’ prick. I’m gonna make sure my scent is all fuckin’ over ya’ so he won’t even go near ya’. I wan’a fuckin’ kill that prick.” His fucking was more rough, his nails dug into your hips causing them to bleed a little. He was going to mark you, make you his..his grip on you hips were harsh, keeping you in place as he fucked you like a wild animal, “don’ forget this, ya’ better not. You know how I ‘m wit’ya. This’ll happen a lot more when ya’ least expect it..betta’ look forward to it. Don’ have any expectations eitha’..I’ll break them. One by fuckin’ one. Deal?”, his greenish-blue eyes glowed in the low lit room, you responded weakly, “y—yesh..I—I…understwand…m—mph..please…I wa—wana’ cuumm..”

“Mm? Ya’ wan’a cum? Do ya’ deserve it?” He asked, at this point he was toying with you. You wanted to feel him fill you up again, you wanted to cum with him SO fuckin’ bad. You nodded like a dumbass..unable to speak. You were stimulated with pleasure, pleasure that you couldn’t stop feeling. You felt his cock hit every spot inside your pussy, it felt so fucking good. The way it would throb inside you, the way it would tickle your cervix, the way it fucked your womb. “Fine, betta’ take’t like a good slut.” He came once more, filling up your already full hole, you came along with him. The cum had dripped out of you, onto your thighs, to the counter, and onto the floor..that was gonna be a bitch to fuckin’ clean out but you’ll worry about that later. Your back was sore from arching so much you laid completely on the kitchen counter, gasping and panting heavily hoping that he was done, he was. Thank god.. you weren’t able to speak but you nuzzled your head onto his hand and kissed the palm of it out of appreciation before slowly falling asleep on the counter. You were so exhausted but at least now you knew better..he didn’t want you smelling like other men or being around ones that purposely tried to take you away from him. Toji smiled, he picked your sleeping body up bringing you to the bed room, he was going to clean you up later but you needed rest and so did he. You were both exhausted.

─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

[xazse]

Girly pop hear me out school jock scaramouche with childe’s naive sister reader 😟🤭

“DUMB VIRGINS”

Jock Scaramouche x Naive!VirginFemReader

Warnings: Nsfw, Naive!Reader, Virgin!Reader,Fem!Reader, nipplepulling, Pervert!Scara, mean!scara, not proofread, Scara is only worried about himself in this, risky sex, no condom, no foreplay: only kissing used as foreplay, cumming inside.

Notes: SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG, THIS REALLY HAD ME THINKING BUT THATS NOT AN EXCUSE SO I APOLOGIZE DEEPLY I HOPE UR STILL AROUND TO ENJOY IT! And also how do you guys like the new setup?

Childe had made sure everyone knew you were off limits for anything, props to Childe for being so popular. Scaramouche wonders why he wouldn’t wanna share his popularity with his little sister, well adopted sister but the way Childe describes you you’re practically his angel, even though you’re an adopted sister he still showers you with love. You’re a girl who stays to herself and should stay to herself. When Childe begins talking about you he doesn’t stop, going on for a good hour about how sweet you are, how he can never deny you of his wallet, your considerate nature, he just downright adores you.

Scaramouche has interacted with you a few times, you’re a cute shy thing, everytime he’s over Childe’s house you make an effort to say your greetings then go right back up to your room. He feels like he might just have an overblown ego but he can see the way you look at him, the way you avert your gaze when talking to him, it really is adorable.

From the little glances you steal Scara has decided he wants you, and it’s bad, so bad he finds himself wanting at night, wanting to ruin and destroy you, he wants to corrupt and fill your head with needless lies sprinkled with some truths.

So he makes an effort to always come over when Childe invites him, only invites because Childe isn’t stupid he’ll eventually catch on if Scaramouche always asks to come over, sometimes he even has to decline just to take the extra step to ensure Childe doesn’t become suspicious, it hurts his heart when he can’t see your inviting smile.

One evening when Childe does invite Scaramouche over for dinner and a movie, he obliges, thinking nothing of it because often times Childe does cook for the both of them on movie nights, but never did he expect to see you joining the two of them.

Whilst Childe is distracting himself with cooking you plop yourself only a few spots away from Scaramouche, his eyes wander over your attire, choosing to opt with a loose tank top, and some shorts, he decides then and there he’ll try something with you, it’s already evident you want him just as badly even if you haven’t verbally said it.

Both of your eyes meet for a second but he doesn’t look away this time, instead he pats the spot beside him and urges you over, you look towards the kitchen, Childe seems to be in his own world with his awful singing.

You slide over, your knee just barely brushing against his, he doesn’t deem that nearly close enough and fills in the gap of space, he’s bold when he starts to feel up the fat of your thigh, rubbing slowly and sincerely, a slight hitch in your breath eggs him on to slip his fingers In between your thighs but making sure to not overwhelm and touch you “there” immediately. The area around you both feels so warm and tense, like a thick cloud of lust slowly devouring the both of you, Scaramouche grips your cheeks and reels you in for a kiss, your first ever kiss. He’s slow at first, firmly making sure to keep his eyes on the kitchen, he presses his tongue onto yours, you clearly weren’t expecting tongue so early so an attempt to pull back is met with him holding your neck tight while he takes away your ability to breath properly.

He’s so messy with the kiss, pulling back only to force you right back in, even when drool starts to seep from the corner of your mouth he doesn’t let you go. Whines are leaving your lips in hushed intervals, out of the corner of his eye Scara can see how you’re rubbing your thighs together, trying to relieve the slight throb of your little clit, he likes this, likes seeing you so defenseless and obedient. He finally deems his bullying enough and lets you go fully.

Loud coughs fill the room, enough for Childe to step out with a worried expression and seeing Scara patting your back.

“Just a coughing fit, nothing to worry about” Scara speaks for you while rubbing the small of your back.

“Alright, you two can come eat now, just finished up plating everything.” Childe says with a beaming smile and walks back into the kitchen.

You meet scaras eyes and a big mocking sneer is on his face, he pinches your nipple hard before getting up and going to the kitchen.

Dinner is filled with Childes bolstering voice as he cracks joke after joke, with Scaramouche urging him to stop and shut up. He surprisingly ignores you the entire dinner, you know he can feel how impatient and needy you are, you give a virgin a taste of something good and they want more, even if it’s something as simple as kissing.

After dinners wrapped up and plates are cleaned, Childe insists he needs a shower, your shy eyes steal glances at Scara every so often, hinting at exactly what the two of you can do, he’s quick to give you that look back, but his is a little darker.

As soon as Childe departs it feels as though all the air is sucked from the room, you haven’t looked over properly at him once. He’s so close you can feel every breath he takes. He begins with raking his fingers up and down your shoulders, sliding up to your thin spaghetti straps, you’re expecting him to stop, to give you a moment to breathe: this is your first time after all, your head is spinning in a million directions.

He doesn’t give you a signal or anything before he’s tugging the straps down to expose your cute bralette, he deems that useless and tugs that off your shoulders as well. A gasp makes its way towards your lips and your attempt to cover yourself is met with him gripping your wrists firmly. He stares down at them for a minute, admiring just how pretty they are. He wants to take you as you are now, on display and vulnerable, while your brother is completely ignorant, but he knows he has limited time.

He knows what he’s about to do is bad, possibly risky and dangerous but he’s also not thinking very well, he just wants to be buried inside of you immediately.

Suddenly you’re being manhandled to lie on the couch, with him inbetween your legs. Letting your eyes drift you can see his cock straining against his pants. He’s lifting up your hips a little to pull your shorts around your thighs, he doesn’t want to take them all the way off just incase.

He also does the same to himself: pulling his cock out, now you really get a good look at just how big he is, more long than he is thick. His cock is a pretty tan-pink and very obviously leaking precum.

He’s also looking at your pussy, it makes him twitch a little to think about how he’ll ruin you for any other person, he’ll make sure your first time is something to remember, you’re wet from the little bit of kissing earlier, probably not as much as you should be but that’s something he can apologize for later.

He pushes your legs up towards your stomach but saving room for himself to squeeze inbetween them. He moves to stroke himself a few times, fully getting up to the expression on your face, an attempt at a brave face, he wants to wipe that right off.

He guides himself to your lips, tapping his cock against you, he teases you a little by sliding up and down between your lips again, bumping against your clit has small whimpers leaving your pretty lips.

He finds your hole, and presses against it, you’re quick to brace yourself. Him pushing hurts so bad for you but he does pause in intervals to let you breathe. Every inch is like torture for the both of you, Scaramouche finding it hard to not just shove himself deep within you, and you finding it hard to adjust to just how long he is. When he does manage to get to a good place, tears are filling your waterline, this is where he’ll stop. Poor thing, you only had a few more inches to take but he doesn’t say that out loud.

He begins fucking into you but not going past the point he had stopped, god you feel so fucking good around him, his dick twitching everytime he pushes inside your wet walls, virgins are really the best. A groan is heard from Scara, huffs as well, as he tells you just how amazing this is.

It’s starting to make you feel a little jumpy, slight electric shocks are shaking your clit, You’ve never felt like this, the pain is still there but also some pleasure can be felt.

“Shi…t..” scaras pace increases while he attempts to stay in control, you’ll be the death of him, literally. He presses your thighs loser to your shoulders successfully folding you, this lets his cock hit just a little deeper. You’re whining at this point, trying to stay quiet over Childes shower.

Your mind can only focus on him and his cock, the drag of it only deluding you more and more. He takes his fingers and rubs your clit roughly, getting a loud lewd reaction out of you. You begin tightening around him, pulling him into your heat more and more. Both of you haven’t noticed how he’s slipping in deeper an deeper, lust ridden minds only worried about cumming with each other.

His balls are slapping against your ass, this makes the room even louder minus your also loud mewling. At this point your entire pussy is feeling nothing but the urge to come, it’s so different from just rubbing your clit at night, it’s something more awful. Trying to voice on how you feel so weird to Scara is useless as all that’s spilling is moans. Soon the combined pace and clit rubbing has you pawing to get away from Scaramouche but he holds you down and fucking you meaner, and faster.

You can’t move as your body twitches on its own and your cumming all over his cock, he covers your mouth to hide your final and last yelp before your mind goes blank. The aftershocks hurt as his hips won’t stop fucking into you, his stomach hurts and tightens just like yours as he bottoms out and cums inside you.

Scaramouche taps your face a little to hear some praise about how well he did but finds that you’re fast asleep. He’s quick to situate yourself and have you looking like nothing happened, then doing the same to himself.

A few moments later Childe is out of the shower and walking to the couch.

“Aww, of course she’s the first to fall asleep” he’s quick to pat your sleeping form as light snores leave you.

[todorokies]

RUMOR HAS IT - suguru geto

✩࿐ the streets of london have now been considered a danger for citizens when a blood hunger vampire prowls looking for their next lady in waiting . . .

contents: very suggestive, fem!reader, vampire!geto, geto is bewitched by you(r blood), nanami cameo (yippee), nineteenth century gothic victorian era, this leans towards the thriller side, reader is a bit naive, a wee bit of manipulation, blood drinking, usage of ‘m’lady’, inspired by the song ‘rumor has it’ by adele & this tweet, 2.5k words

a/n: there is a lot of imagery written !!! i truly hope u all like it, reblogs & supportive feedback is welcome ik the wc is a lot but pls bare with me :”) . . . apart of @kentopedia’s ‘love through the ages’ collab

the sun has begun to shift into its everlasting transition of casting soft orange hues of light that are softly entangled with a dark shade of blue that covers up above. the moon had tucked its companion away for the time being as it began to come into view.

the current state of main street however didn’t reflect the tranquillity of peace; the town clock had loudly reverberated alerting the public of the danger that would soon lurk.

citizens both young and old trampled out of buildings leaving a simple gust of wind in their wake to reach their residences.

a curfew had recently been implemented by the town council in order to reduce the sudden influx —dubbed as animal attacks— of women being found lifeless on the cold streets, with their blood being completely drained from their bodies.

but alas, the troublesome rumours of the attacks being performed by a person rather than an animal, rattled in, heightening the unpleasantries.

the rotten smell of fear lingers in the air with the pumping adrenaline coursing through the towns folks veins. if the perpetrator weren’t foolish enough, an entire course meal has been presented onto a platter for them.

“staring won’t do you any good if you end up dead.” nanami, your coworker, noted who was packing the last of the bakery’s unsold goods in a bag to be taken home.

you quickly drew away from the windowsill, “doesn’t the site of it all make you miserable. this new curfew has done nothing but made everyone even more frightened.”

nanami’s features softened and pursed his lips in a thin line before sighing. “the curfew is sensible in hindsight, but when rules are enforced people have a sudden urge to break them, mainly to figure out what animal—”

“—or person,” you sharply cut him off which causes his eyebrows to crinkle.

“i mean, let’s face it, what kind of animal leaves two perfectly clean puncture wounds on the neck and abandons the body as it is without any carnage?”

a beat follows before you continue, “this is obviously the work of some mad scientist in town looking to make a name for themselves.”

he sighs, “animal or …person, you shouldn’t be standing here chatting with me about it.”

his eyes twinkle with remorse whilst handing the bag of baked goods over to you, “i could chaperone you to your residence, you do live on the outskirts of town. i deeply worry about your safety.”

you lightheartedly scoff, politely waving off the suggestion. “nonsense kento, i always seem to have luck on my side, the walk home will be uneventful as always.”

he frowns at this.

you can be extraordinarily stubborn at the most inappropriate times.

“besides what would society think once they see an unwed woman getting escorted by the opposite sex. you should hurry home yourself! send my kind regards to yuuji for me.”

you bunch up the detailed lace of your overflowing gown in one hand while holding the brown bag of pastries in the other.

swiftly scurrying off into the abandoned streets, “do take care of yourself!”

“get home safely and hurry before the streetlights turn on!” nanami yells out the door before locking up the establishment and heading on his own way.

the cobblestone beneath your feet painfully ached and crumbled apart with each passing step you took. shutters from other houses forcefully swung open from the wind that picked up overtime, soon a ghastly fog began to move in, hindering some of your vision.

you truthfully dreaded this. nanami’s offer is still mulled in the back of your head, you mentally slap yourself for dismissing a comforting and preferably safer option of returning home.

however, dwelling on the what if’s have never been your cup of tea, instead you attempt to take in the scenery of the town in it’s glory.

the eerie atmosphere reminded you of an agatha christie novel you’ve once read. the fond memory warms you up in the dead of night.

soon your manor appears into view. relief immediately washes over you, a small breath of air exited your lungs.

but then you hear it; an extra set of footsteps a mile or two from behind you that rippled the cement.

too heavy of a stride to be another woman in heels and too human-like to be a four legged animal. with each step you took, they would take on another, almost in sync to throw you off their suspicions.

you felt bare and exposed as the only thing that you could focus on was the tangible breeze rattling your bones, fingers turning numb and losing its feeling. your head buzzed considering the only two options to best handle the situation: continue the venture to your housing or confront the entity.

continuing your journey would result in the mysterious entity gaining knowledge of your location. whereas, standing idly waiting for the perpetrator’s next move would result in you being the newspaper’s front headliner.

you’ve concluded the mental battle with yourself on cutting through the woods and loosing whomever is behind you in the dust.

just as you were about to pick up your feet, a tap by a set of fingers rippled against your shoulder causing you to shriek.

“m’lady, i believe you dropped this.” a sultry voice booms through your ears that belonged to a man so majestic you couldn’t comprehend. your breath staggers while your mouth hang slightly agape.

he was as pale as a lilith in its full bloom but still managed to glisten under the moonlight. monolid eyes sharpened that showcased nothing but intensity and gluttony.

you couldn’t dare away, especially not when his gaze has your flesh burning to the touch as heat pools between your legs, an endless void of lust and mystery.

somehow breaking out of his enchantment, you regain consciousness, blinking away the blurriness and swiftly take the handkerchief he handed to you and stuff it in your dress pocket.

“o-oh, thank you kind sir,” your words heavily slurs past your lips.

his overwhelming aura seemingly switches, presenting more of a laid back approach when speaking to you.

“what’s a dream like you doing roaming the streets at this hour?” he inquired.

it’s almost like whiplash— fear surging from every portion of your body to feeling a sense of ease with his presence around.

your face warms up. subconsciously picking at the skin that surrounds your nail beds. “just trying to make my way home, i had picked up a late shift from—”

“the bakery in town square, correct?”

taking a step, his taller frame leaned a quarter into your personal space suddenly being consumed by his aroma. sweetness mixed with a hint of sandalwood and lavender.

his fingers weakly pranced around a single strand of your hair that had been loose, meticulously swirling it about in a specific way that only pleased him.

only then were you able to come about his long raven locks that were styled in a charming half-do that seemingly blended in with the sinful sombre of the midnight sky.

your pulse amplified, picking up like the speed of lightning. your hands soon began accumulating sweat just by a single question.

despite town square serving the population of two countries bound together, not once have you had the pleasure of encountering this man.

he was far too bewitching to grace the status of a commoner. no, he must be a figure of royalty or at least had rich wealth flowing through his blood, but he showcases no obvious signs of luxury.

just who was this man exactly?

he watches you regain control over your psyche, backing away which lets the strand of hair he possessed on his finger seemingly bounce free.

“enlighten me. how do you possess knowledge of the location of my employment? my eyes have never seen someone of the likes of you before.”

he senses utter hostility from you. the entire cobbled street reeks of your fear. he can practically taste your appetizing disdain on the tip of his tongue.

his bottom lip gets trapped between his teeth to conceal the withering moan that elicited from his core; you’re unsettled by him which only fuels his erogenous.

he playfully surrenders his hands in the air as if you had just caught him in an obtuse act, “what, pray tell, are you insinuating?”

you scoff, “do you take me for a mockery?” your voice doesn’t waver, eyebrows cinched together with lips into a firm line.

he simply tuts, “only a well put together woman like yourself could gain employment at such a high end bakery that stands in town square. i based such an assumption off my judgement . . . forgive me, m’lady.”

your eyes cautiously scan his face to detect any signs of playfulness that went against his explanation. when none was present, it was your cue to ease up on your suspicions.

with a sharp intake of air, your tense shoulders unwind themselves from your ears as you straighten out your dress trying to knead at any wrinkles.

the bakery in town has built a famous name for itself, being known as one of the most ancient buildings standing tall, as well as offering fresh pastries throughout many wars and battles.

different hierarchies from all across the globe have made it their mission to invest in a trade deal of importing the bakery’s goods in exchange for many benefits.

“then again, you find yourself situated on this street conversing with an utter stranger during after hours. so pray tell, who exactly is the jester here?” he dryly asks.

the warm energy circulating between the two of you came to a sudden halt as the tension quickly grew cold.

his voice is fervent. a barbaric ignorance flows naturally in his tone as if he was challenging you, which is much different than how he addressed your inquiry.

truthfully suguru was growing impatient by the minute. he has worked all of the charms in the book but you still haven’t given him an opening for what he wanted the most. your body, soul and most importantly; your blood.

he salivated at the sight of the minuscule veins on your neck becoming more prominent when your voice raises an obtuse or two.

the excruciating torment of his body thumping with thirst made his head throb. his tongue swirled hungrily around his sharp left fang in anticipation. 

if you had blinked, you would’ve missed how he traveled at the speed of light. a gust of wind swept through the streets as a strong swooshing of air caused the ends of your dress to get caught up in the wake. suddenly, you were face to face again with the mystery man, his nose ever so gently grazing yours, feeling his cold breath onto your lips.

his eyes carefully scans your features, taking notice of the crease between your eyebrows. “you aren’t aware of my name yet you give me your time of day? or rather night that is? i feel honoured.” he purrs.

your heart collapses to your feet. what in god’s name were you doing?

allowing yourself to get seduced by a nameless maniac on the street at the devil’s hour. letting your head get filled to the brim with such deception and trickery. your bread must’ve gone stale and you hadn’t noticed until now how terribly your feet ached from standing for so long.

your brain screamed at you to pick up your feet and dash out of a sickly situation you’ve unfortunately found yourself in. but to no avail your soles stood firmly in place, you pitied yourself for still being under his aphrodisiac.

your eyes sting as tears begin to well up into the base of your waterline. he shushes you by lightly tapping his index fingers against your bottom lip then leans into the shell of your ear, “you were the most naive out of others yet the most challenging one, what is your secret, m’lady?”

the only thing you could muster up in the moment was a faint, “p-please don’t hurt me…”

to that, suguru’s current expression gets replaced by a look of genuine remorse. he smiles fondly, his eyes forming into crescent moons. “you mustn’t worry, i have different plans for you. now be a darling and tilt your head for me.”

his eyes glowed a crimson hue that casted a reflection in your own eyes. his divine string of words compelled you to follow his demand, having no conscious influence over your own actions.

he could see your arteries viciously pumping oxygen. unstable hollow breaths depart from your plump lips.

what a delightful sight you are.

finally, his fangs penetrate your fragile skin causing goosebumps to arise upon impact as angry scarlett red seeps out of the two puncture holes he’d created.

you gasp, your head is frantically bubbling with heat as your knees buckle, static shoots through your joints feeling vibrations all over your body.

he gently cradles the back of your head with one hand using his grip to better his angle on his landscape. drowsiness consumes you whole. feeling yourself slowly slipping into a labyrinth that only the man in front of you has the key to.

your whimpers and soft pants fill the air. your stomach soon coils with a pleasant sensation of pleasure, you’ve truly gone mad as you bite your lip to cover up the choked up moans from the pleasurable aches of pain.

your eyes roll back to the sky, mentally counting the stars until your body decides to shut down what leftover functions it had left.

your eyes softly flutter open, wincing almost immediately from the dim overhead lap that shines directly in your face.

you’re currently lying on top of the broody velvet red loveseat that resided in your manor’s foyer. how you got home is beyond your comprehension.

suddenly the horrific memories of this particular night floods in your head like a tsunami.

that man… his fangs…the blood.

your hand quickly flies towards the area of the wound that resided on your neck, which to your surprise, is covered by a heavily padded gauze that will soon need to be changed once you get up.

who or what brought you home and tended to your wound? was it that man or maybe he had left you on the streets, barely alive when another lost soul roaming at the witching hour took you home.

you spot a glass of water on the floor that had a note taped onto it next to your bagged pastries. you cautiously pick up the glass to hydrate your overly dry throat then carefully peel the paper off the glass to read the note.

the contents of the note reads:

i have seeked high and low for the purest form of life, to find a companion worthy enough to indulge me in this wretched world of misery but yet, you were found from right under my nose.

your purity sings to me like a songbird o’holiest of thee. a crystallized soul patiently waiting for a body to mold.

your blood is as rare as black dahlia, hidden deep within the nooks of clouded nostalgia. your pastel beauty is the cure to my everlasting torment in hell.

i will return for you, my love.

always and forever yours, suguru.

tags: @cawwn @osaemu @yunymphs @megumimania @dollria @maeby-cursed @get0

reblogs & feedback is extremely appreciated !! <3

[de4dlyniightshade]

꩜ QUEEN OF HEARTS

꩜ PAIRING: spencer reid x afab!reader

꩜ RATING: +18, mdni

꩜ WORD COUNT: 3.8k

꩜ WARNINGS/CONTAINS!: smut, public sex, sub!virgin!spencer, cumming in pants, thigh riding(ish), fingering, praise, a little exhibitionism, getting caught(kinda).

꩜ PROMPT: sneaky fooling around with sub spence on the job

© to de4dlyniightshade. no translations/reposts.

[WARNING!] - explicit sexual content! mdni!

A/N: i have mixed feelings about this but i'm posting it anyway bcs i feel like it. also this is proofread but i'm a moron and blind so don't get your hopes up:3

Spencer was, gently put, dumb. Now, obviously, he was intelligent, very, very intelligent, but you can be both in rare instances, and Spencer was a rare instance.

He was completely unaware and blind to his looks, which was obviously due to his childhood of being relentlessly bullied and tormented, causing him to overlook his appearance and how truly attractive he was, no matter how many people told him, flirted with him, or hit on him. I mean his nickname was literally "pretty boy" for a reason, but he just thought it was a sarcastic joke.

"All alone, handsome?" You smiled, noticing Spencer tucked away in a conference room all on his own, surrounded by files, your voice making him look up from the one he was reading.

"Oh uhm, yeah, it just got a little loud out there; I work better in a quiet place," he explained, a tight-lipped smile on his face before he looked back down at the file, furrowing his brows as he scanned it.

"Everything okay?" You asked at his expression, worried that he was struggling and needed a break, which he was terrible at, always overworking himself for the sake of the case, even though he could barely think straight after working himself to the bone for days.

"Yeah, I just- I can't find any connection." He sighed, dropping the file on the table before leaning back in his chair and rubbing his hands over his face and through his hair.

"Need some fresh eyes?" you offered, closing the door behind you to help drown out the loud chattering in the police station you were working in, slowly making your way over to him and hoisting yourself onto the desk beside him, not missing the way he swallowed, his eyes flicking down to your thighs before looking away again.

"Y-Yeah, sure," he murmured, sliding the file over to you before dropping his hands to his lap to fidget with his fingers, picking at the sides of his nails nervously.

"Spence, stop," you warned, looking at him with knowing eyes. It was a bad habit you'd noticed he had, sometimes picking his skin so much that it was red and raw and sometimes bleeding. You'd told him many times to stop before he hurt himself, but it never really worked.

"Sorry…" he mumbled, flattening his hands on his thighs before looking away from you again, scanning the room to distract himself. Your eyes landed on his hands, noticing a familiar red substance at the side of his nail, making you let out a sigh.

"Spencer, you're bleeding; gimme your hand," you sighed, placing the file down beside you and holding your hand out to him, watching his eyes flick between your face and your hand a few times.

"The amount of pathogens passed through holding hands is staggering; it's actually safer to kiss." He stated, it was completely innocent, but the way your stomach churned wasn't. You'd had a thing for Spencer for a long time, but he was just so naive that he couldn't see it; today he'd see it.

"Is that an offer?" You teased, quirking your brow at him as his eyes widened, realising what he had said and who he said it to—a very attractive woman who was sitting right in front of him in a small, hidden room with the door closed and the blinds drawn, his cheeks flushing at the implication.

"N-No, I was just- I- " He stuttered, averting your gaze and swallowing thickly as you smiled at his flustered state, watching as he lifted his hand, placing it in yours in an attempt to make the whole conversation stop.

"Oh Spencer, does that not hurt?" You tutted, furrowing your brows at him at the raw, bleeding skin on his finger, your thumb stroking the back of his hand, absentmindedly.

"A little..." he spoke softly, lowering his head slightly as you sighed.

"Hold on, just a second," you said as you got up from the table, making your way to the door where you'd left your bag, unzipping it and digging through it for a moment, perhaps bending over to show a little bit of your butt from under your skirt on purpose before you finally pulled a bandaid from one of the pockets and made your way back to him.

"Good thing I'm prepared, huh?" You smiled, sitting back on the desk, but closer this time, with Spencer immediately holding his hand out to you for you to take gently, opening the bandaid and carefully wrapping it around his finger, forcing yourself to hold back a smile as you raised his hand to your face, placing a gentle kiss on top of the bandaid, leaving a faint lipstick stain on the tan material.

"Better?" you asked sweetly, holding back a smirk at his pink cheeks, the blush spreading to the tips of his ears, and you just couldn't help yourself. "Oh Spencer, are you feeling okay? Your cheeks are really red," you feigned concern as you reached out to press the back of your hand to his cheek, feeling the heat radiating from his face.

"Y-Yeah, fine," he said, his voice cracking as he tried to sound sure of himself and failing as his cheeks became redder at your touch.

"Are you sure, honey?" You asked sweetly, slipping in the petname just to see him gulp and avoid your eyes, wetting his lips nervously as he shifted in his seat.

Spencer couldn't even answer you, completely avoiding looking even close to you as you shifted closer to him, your eyes boring into him as you saw a very faint sheen of sweat lining his temple.

"Am I making you nervous?" You asked in a low tone, quirking your brow at him as you saw his eyes widen a little at your question, his lips parting as he let out a shaky breath, gulping down his nerves as he looked up at you shyly.

"M-Maybe a little," he admitted bashfully, looking away from you again, staring down at his shoes as you felt lust stirring in your stomach at the sight of him so nervous, admitting that you had an effect on him.

"Y'know, when I tell you that you're pretty, I mean it, don't you?" You asked him, looking at him with doe eyes as he looked back at you with a similar expression.

"Y-You do?" He sounded genuinely surprised, as if he didn't believe you.

"Of course I do. I mean not to sound like I'm in love with you or anything, but you're beautiful, Spencer, and I mean that." You spoke softly, standing up to shift closer to him, standing between his legs and leaning on the desk in front of him, forcing him to look up at you as you towered over him.

"T-Thank you," he breathed shyly, moving his hands to rest between his thighs and covering his crotch with his forearms as he looked anywhere but your face.

"Move your hands," you ordered suddenly, Spencer finally looking at you, brows pulled together slightly at your sudden change in behaviour.

"W-What?" He stuttered, gulping as he shifted in his seat, his hands still planted between his parted thighs, licking his lips as you heard the faint sound of his breathing picking up.

"I said, move your hands," you repeated, this time more sternly, pulling your lip between your teeth as you watched his hands twitch, taking a shaky breath before he hesitantly moved his hands to rest on his thighs, dropping his head in slight humiliation that he'd been caught.

"Oh my, I make you more than nervous," you stated in a sultry tone, Spencer letting out a breathy whine just loud enough for you to hear. The sound was all you needed to have you standing up abruptly, moving to place your knee between his thighs, your hands lifting to rest on either side of his neck.

"Can I kiss you, pretty boy?" You asked breathily, your thumb stroking over his pulse, feeling his breath hitch in his throat at your question before he gulped, nodding quickly.

"Use your words," you teased, watching as his tongue darted out to wet his lips, visibly nervous under your gaze.

"P-Please," he spoke under his breath, looking up at you with wide doe eyes as you smiled down at him, wordlessly leaning towards him, stopping just shy of his lips for a moment just to feel him lean towards you slightly to chase your lips before you finally closed the gap, feeling a whine vibrate against your lips.

Spencer's kissing was slightly clumsy and clearly inexperienced, desperately trying to keep up with you as you kissed him with fervour, letting your teeth graze his bottom lip, your hands trailing up from his neck into his hair at the nape of his neck, your fingertips massaging his scalp as he keened into you, his hips rolling upward, the motion piquing your curiosity, shifting your knee forward to press to his crotch, a moan slipping into your mouth as he bucked his hips again.

"That feel good, handsome?" You pulled away just enough to ask him, your lips brushing his and his hot breath fanning your lips as he panted, his eyes still closed.

"Y-Yeah," he breathed, making you smirk as you pressed your knee harder into his clothed cock, a whimper falling from his swollen lips as he rutted his cock into you, moving his hands to hold your thigh, squeezing your flesh in an attempt to compose himself, pushing himself down to the chair to still his movements.

"Keep going," you husked as you moved to press your lips to his neck, leaving open-mouthed kisses over his pulse, the feeling making him moan as he couldn't help but rut against you, his cheeks flushed at what he was doing.

"W-what if someone-" he stuttered, cutting himself off with a whine as you grazed your teeth on his skin, licking over smooth skin.

"What if?" you said teasingly, your voice low and sultry as you lowered one hand to hold his that was still on your thigh, slowly moving it up and under your skirt. "Touch me," you breathed into his ear, a moan falling from his lips before he gulped, inching his hand higher and higher until he could cup your clothed core, gasping at the heat that radiated from you.

"W-What do I do?" He asked meekly, embarrassed that he didn't know how to touch you properly and that his inexperience only made you want him more.

"Well, first, my underwear need to be out of the picture." You laughed breathily, Spencer blushing and letting out a shaky breath as he used his fingers to move your damp underwear to the side, the fact that he didn't even remove them making you clench around nothing.

"Now touch me." You breathed, biting down on your bottom lip, watching as he gulped before ever so gently pressing his fingertips to your cunt, his middle finger slipping between your folds, resting at your slick entrance, his eyes widening at the feeling, his mouth dropping open slightly.

"Y-You're so...wet," he practically whimpered, not even realising how attractive what he said was, his words making you moan quietly, "inside baby," you breathed, taking his wrist into your hand to guide him, holding his hand where he needed to be before he slowly pushed his middle finger upward, his fingertip slipping into you and making his jaw fall slack as your walls surround his finger.

"God, you've got the perfect fingers for this, baby," you practically moaned, letting your head tip back as you still held his wrist.

"I do?" he asked, his voice slightly whiny as he gazed up at you.

"Mhm, fit so nicely inside me," you murmured absentmindedly, completely forgetting that this wasn't some raunchy dream you were having, your words making him moan low in his throat.

"Curl your finger towards you for me, love," you instructed softly. Spencer immediately followed your exact instructions, curling his middle finger gradually until you let out a quiet gasp, stopping his movements completely.

"D-Did I hurt you?" He asked worriedly, his behaviour and concern making your heart swell.

"N-No baby, no, felt good, k-keep going," you breathed, stroking your thumb over his wrist as you moved the other to rest on his shoulder, balancing yourself so you could move your leg to the outer side of his thigh, spreading your legs for him so he had more access.

"You can add another, baby," you encouraged softly, knowing that he wouldn't do it on his own out of fear of hurting you in any way.

"O-Okay," he breathed, swallowing nervously as he pulled his finger out almost fully, leaving just his fingertip in before he pressed his index finger in beside it, slowly pushing them both in at once, watching your face intently as your jaw fell slack, eyes closed as a breathy moan slipped past your parted lips.

"F-fuck, baby," you mewled as Spencer curled his slender fingers into you on his own accord, his hips rolling into your thigh at the sound of your voice and the feeling of you clenching around his fingers.

"G-Gimme your hand," you asked, holding yours out to him as he placed his free hand in yours with a slightly confused expression that quickly became a completely infatuated, lust-filled expression as you let go of his wrist to hike your skirt up around your waist, exposing the sight of his fingers buried in your cunt.

"O-oh my-" Spencer tried to speak, his words turning into a whimper as you bucked your hips slightly, his fingers pushing in deeper, the sight of them disappearing into you making his cock throb against your leg, hips stuttering against his will.

"J-Just stay right there and make this motion," you explained breathlessly, placing Spencer's thumb on your neglected clit and motioning circles with yours to show him what to do, watching him nod shakily before he made one tentative circle, watching how you reacted, the gasp you let out showing him that it was good, so he repeated the motion again and again until he had a pace going.

"Oh, Spence, g-good baby, so good, c-curl your fingers at the same time for me," you breathed, Spencer immediately doing as you asked, curling both his fingers into you until they were pressed to that soft spot inside you. The way you moaned when he reached it made him realise that spot was what made you react, so he experimented a little, uncurling his fingers before repeating the motion, a louder but still hushed sound falling from your lips as he did.

"Such a quick learner," you mewled as he continued his steady motions, his thumb circling your clit in time with his fingers. Your praise made him blush and rut into your thigh harder than he had before, and your curiosity piqued.

"You like when I praise you? tell you how good you are?" you asked, the way Spencer whimpered and fucked into your thigh again giving you your answer, a smirk tugging at your lips.

"Be a good boy and go faster for me," you instructed, your words of praise making him completely pliant, instantly picking up his pace and making you almost double over as the pleasure shot through you, the motion making your leg slot right between his thighs, leaving no distance between your thigh as his painfully hard length straining against his pants, a pathetic whimper ripped from his throat as his hips bucked desperately into you, this time at a constant pace, Spencer unable to hold back from chasing any kind of friction.

"So pretty fucking my thigh, baby, you like humping my leg like a good boy?" You cooed, bringing your hand to his jaw and letting your thumb stroke over his plush bottom lip, watching as he let his mouth open, as if inviting you in, and you just couldn't deny, letting your thumb slip past his lips and into his warm mouth, clenching around his fingers as he wrapped his beautiful lips around it.

"Oh my, such a good boy," you praised, your voice breathy and low as you felt your orgasm creeping up on you, the way Spencer's fingers consistently curled into you, his thumb never faltering on your clitoral area, his pace matching that of his hips constantly fucking your thigh, his brain going into autopilot as he sucked on your thumb.

"I-I feel- weird," Spencer whimpered around your thumb, just barely audible, but you heard him, his words making you want to coo at him, knowing exactly what the feeling was.

"You're gonna cum, baby boy; it's okay; gonna feel good; just let it happen." You spoke soothingly, pulling your thumb from his mouth and watching as he opened his eyes to look up at you with a doe-like expression, his lips parted and wet as he let out a constant stream of whimpers and moans, his hips stuttering as he desperately fucked your thigh, chasing his orgasm as he brought you to yours.

"F-fuck baby, you're gonna make me cum; keep going; just a little more for mommy." The word slipped out without a thought. You were so caught up in the moment that you didn't even think about it until Spencer let out a choked moan, delivering a particularly hard thrust onto your thigh, your jaw falling slack at what slipped past his lips.

"M-mommy, 'm gonna c-cum," he choked out, letting out little gasps and whimpers as tears spilled from his eyes. He looked utterly gorgeous, completely fucked out, and cumdrunk, so much so that he was calling you mommy and humping your thigh, the whole thing pushing you so close to the edge.

"Oh, baby, so fucking pretty. Gonna cum, you want that? You want mommy to cum on your pretty fingers?" You husked, watching as Spencer nodded mindlessly, clearly not even knowing what he was agreeing to.

"Oh, o-oh, m-mommy! mommy, I can't, I'm-" Spencer stammered, cutting himself off with a choked sob as his hips stilled, cum spurting into his underwear as his whole body tensed, including his hands, his fingers curling into you as far as they'd go, harshly pressing to your sweet spot as his thumb pressed into your clit, the sudden pressure sending you over the edge with a muffled moan, gushing around his fingers as your walls spasmed and thighs trembled.

Spencer continued to shallowly fuck your thigh through his orgasm, little whimpers and whines falling from his lips as he completely soiled his pants, cum seeping through to your thigh and the warm, sticky liquid smearing on your skin.

"Oh, baby, you made such a mess of yourself," you cooed, pouting down at him as you cupped his cheeks, his eyes looking up at you completely dazed as he whimpered.

"You did so well for mommy," you said softly, stroking his soft skin with your thumbs as he pouted, completely fucked out and submissive.

"Okay, baby, slow for me; you can take your fingers out now and we'll get you cleaned up, okay?" You encouraged him sweetly, Spencer nodding as he slowly, like you'd instructed, pulled his fingers out of you, the feeling of his skin dragging against your sensitive walls making you wince slightly.

Once Spencer slipped his fingers fully out of you, he couldn't help but fixate on the slick, shiny liquid that coated them, watching as it created strings between them when he spread them apart, and he just couldn't resist. Your jaw dropped as you watched him bring his soaked fingers to his lips, burying them in his mouth and moaning around them as he tasted you.

"You like how mommy tastes, baby?" You asked, smiling to yourself as you watched him clean every last drop, nodding with his fingers still in his mouth.

"Sticky," he whined once he pulled his fingers from his mouth, shifting in his seat awkwardly. "...and cold," he whined harder, looking up at you with big eyes as if begging you to do something.

"Okay, baby, let's clean you up," you smiled, fixing your soiled underwear and shimmying your skirt back down before planting your foot back on the ground and scanning the room.

"There's no tissues in here," you sighed, furrowing your brows as Spencer whined harder, pressing his thighs together desperately.

"D-Don't like it, mommy," he sniffled, making you turn quickly to see him with teary eyes and pouty lips. He was completely submissive, which was a problem you'd deal with later; right now he needed you.

"It's okay, baby, it's okay; don't cry," you soothed as you cupped his cheeks, watching as his bottom lip quivered slightly. "Mommy's going to think of something," you reassured him, taking another look around the room. An idea springs to mind, and he's not going to like it.

"Okay, you're not going to like it, but it's the only way, okay?" You told him, making sure to talk softly to him so as not to make him think you were being mean. Spencer was sensitive as is, but in this state? He needed the most care.

"O-Okay," he replied hesitantly, curious about what he wouldn't like but also slightly worried.

You let go of his face to turn around and reach over the desk, picking up Spencer's, now stone cold, coffee cup and turning back to him, seeing the dots connect in his mind at what you were planning, the whole idea making him whine but nodding nonetheless, knowing it was the only cover-up that wasn't going to be too suspicious.

"I'm going to spill this on you, and then we're going to go out there; I'll tell them I knocked it over and I feel terrible, and then we're going to go back to the hotel and get you changed, okay?" You explained your plan fully, making sure he was comfortable with the whole thing.

"Okay…" he mumbled, knowing that this was about to be unpleasant and impossibly stickier, but on the upside, the hotel wasn't far, and he got to spend some time alone with you away from work, so it was worth it in the end.

"Sorry, sweetie," you winced as you poured the liquid over his lap, watching as he jumped at the cold feeling seeping into his clothes, feeling terrible about making him uncomfortable.

"Alright, let's go. I don't want you sitting in wet clothes for too long," you said as you quickly placed the cup back on the desk, taking a Spencer hand in yours to help him to his feet and leading him to the door where your bag was, hoisting it onto your shoulder and swinging the door open. Your eyes immediately meeting hotch looking at you from a desk not far from you.

"I spilled Spencer's coffee on him; thank God it was cold, but I feel terrible. I'm gonna give him a ride to the hotel to change; we won't be long," you explained quickly, all but dragging Spencer through the station to the exit, not giving the team time to tease or make jokes.

"How dumb do they think we are?" Derek snorted to the team once you were out of earshot, the others shaking their head and agreeing with him as they continued their work.

@cancersunthatsit @mindfullycriminal @reidsdaisies @iluvreid @teachugger69 @queermaxwooo @olives-and-sunshine @ac0511 @unimportantweirdo @criminalmindswife @deluluforu @busybeingstrange

(if you wanna be tagged when i post fics just lmk!)

[updownlately]

you can start a family (who will always show you love)

| alessia russo x reader | fluff (and some minuscule angst) | 2.1k | disclaimer: mentions of a broken childhood and toxic parents | a/n: based on this ask. been a minute since i wrote anything proper so criticism/feedback is very much appreciated. be as harsh as you want :) sorry for how long this took and i hope this is alright! happy reading 🫶

~~~

“Penny for your thoughts?”

You hummed as you heard the words, a tired smile resting on your lips as you felt a familiar pair of arms wrap around your waist, pulling you in steadily, warmth seeping into your bones. 

You’d been standing around the corner of the kitchen, a handful of metres away from the living room, after excusing for a moment, deciding that you just needed a minute to yourself. 

You certainly didn’t expect the blonde to follow you. 

Leaning your head back gently onto Alessia’s shoulder, you closed your eyes as you revelled in the touch.

“It’s…-”

Face scrunched as you thought deeply to find the words, you sighed before continuing, “It’s different...”

You paused for a second, choosing your next words wisely as you tried to find ones that could do justice to the voices in your head. 

Nodding to yourself, you continued. “Yeah. Like a good different, but different y’know?” 

Swallowing hard as you spoke the realisation into existence, you didn’t even realize how harshly you were gripping the blonde’s arm until she gently tugged your hand away. 

Feeling Alessia’s hands intertwine with your own, thumb rubbing comforting circles over the back of your hand almost as if she knew the words weren’t easy to admit for you, you felt some of the tension dissipate from your shoulders. 

The admission was not what the striker was expecting at all, but was more than happy to hear, a small smile crossing her face, heart swelling with pride at her own family. 

“I’m not used to it being this easy.”

Your confession was quiet, nearly getting lost in the energetic chatter and excitement occurring a few metres away from the two of you, yet the taller girl heard it clear as day.

You weren’t close with your family- not much from the start and certainly not anymore. 

Who would’ve thought that two toxic parents and a marriage that was never meant to last coupled with the news of you coming out would’ve resulted in you being promptly asked to leave a house that never quite felt like home.

It never really had come as a surprise to you, to be honest. 

In fact, you’d already been prepared to be kicked out- having slowly begun the process of moving out months before it happened, getting ready for that exact day to come.

So when it finally did occur, you had bid your deuces quietly, mournfully packing away the naive hope of being part of a happy, loving family.

Grimacing to yourself as you tuned back into the moment and realized the rabbit hole you’d just gone down, you shook your head slightly, trying to derail your train of thought from progressing any further.

The action didn’t go unnoticed by the taller girl behind you, her hold tightening a tad bit. 

You smiled wryly as you felt Alessia press a comforting kiss to your temple, lips lingering as she tried to convey just how much appreciated your presence. 

The both of you were currently at Alessia’s childhood home, having been invited for a small family gathering celebrating the Lionesses’ and mainly Alessia’s World Cup run. 

This was also your first time meeting your girlfriend’s family.

Between the nervousness coursing through your veins all throughout dinner and wanting to make the best first impression, yet being in constant awe of just how light everything felt, the evening left you drained, in a good way of course. 

You weren’t used to dinners full of laughter and gentle teasing. Never mind that everything was home cooked and Alessia’s mum had made sure to check in with you regarding any allergies of any sort. 

Too accustomed to take out quietly eaten in your own room as a child, whilst your background noise would be full of yelling and the occasional smash of a plate or a remote, it had been jarring to witness the Russo siblings rib at each other goodnaturedly, laughing even through the worst teasing as Mario and Carol had watched with smiles on their faces, taking sides as necessary to keep the teasing going.

Safe to say, it had been an overwhelming past few hours for you, and all in all, your social battery was dangerously on the brink of exhaustion after three hours. 

Shuffling further back into Alessia’s hold, you let the emotions of the day wash over you, tension escaping you slowly as you took a deep breath in.

“You know they love you already right?”

The sentence was quiet, murmured against your crown and punctuated with a small kiss.

You know the words were meant to bring you comfort, to soothe your bubbling emotions, yet all you felt was the rock in your throat grow, eyes stinging with unshed tears despite being shut as your mind fully comprehended what Alessia had said. 

Opening your mouth to respond, you flexed your jaw as you willed for words to come out.

Only a shuddering breath escaped you however, your hand quickly leaving Alessia’s as you hastily came to swipe away the few tears that had fallen before anyone could see them. 

The blonde caught the action, not that you were trying to hide it, and before you knew it, you were being gently spun around, soft hands coming to tenderly wipe away at your cheeks as you scrunched your eyes at the sting of the sharp ceiling lights.

She was aware of what your childhood had been like, it being something you'd discussed somewhat early on in the relationship when the topic of having kids and a family came up.

She had known you'd been terrified of meeting her family, not at all used to having a parental figures that didn't speak in annoyance and guilt-tripping.

So when you'd hastily excused yourself as everyone settled down for a movie, the striker figured that maybe a moment to yourself may have not been what you needed.

And she was right.

Blue eyes scanning your face for any sign of discomfort, you felt Alessia’s hands slowly slide down from your cheeks, the stark disappearance of their warmth causing your face to scrunch up in displeasure.

Just having Alessia around you brought you a small bit of comfort- comfort that you didn't weren't ready to lose just yet.

Opening your eyes, ready to protest at the removal of her touch, you were about to pout at Alessia when you picked up the soft padding of feet.

It was only then did you clock the sound of footsteps nearing you, your eyes widening in slight panic as your stomach turned in nervous anticipation, desperately trying to guess who it was. 

You didn't want to get in trouble for disappearing from everyone.

You felt Alessia’s hand fall to your arm, rubbing it comfortingly, yet failing to bring you any sense of relief.

In your fear, you didn’t even realize you’d began holding your breath, breathing in shakily as Alessia teasingly asked you not to pass out. 

“Less! Is-“

Alessia’s mother rounded the corner, a worried look on her face that quickly morphed into a relieved one as she saw the pair of you. 

“Oh good. I was worried.” 

Coming to a stop in front of you, the older woman let out a quiet sigh as a gentle smile crossed her face. 

Shooting Alessia a questioning glance, Carol turned towards you, giving you a once over and nodding to herself before turning back to Alessia. 

“Don’t tell me you’ve been troubling my future daughter-in-law Alessia Mia Teresa Russo.”

The stern look that followed brought a small smile to your face, the concern at your well being bringing a sense of comfort to your panicking state. 

“Wha- No! Mum!”

The questioning left Alessia flabbergasted, jaw dropping in shock as she looked at you, then back at her mother, then you again, eyes narrowing this time.

“I’m nice to you and yet this is what I get in return…” the blonde mumbled playfully under her breath, promptly ducking out of the way as her mother swatted teasingly in her direction. 

Turning back towards you, Carol shot you a wink before retracting her hand.

“Has she been bothering you? She can be a handful sometimes! Might need to throw her in a timeout for a little bit!”

“Mum!”

You could feel the smile in Alessia’s interjection, not needing to look over to see the fondness in her eyes as stepped towards you again.

“She’s fine. I wasn’t bothering her one bit.”

Studying you intently to make sure Alessia wasn’t lying, Carol tilted her head before nodding in agreement.

“In that case,” you felt an arm wrap around your shoulders as you got pulled away from your girlfriend, “The brownies just finished cooling! Alessia mentioned they’re your favourite.”

And with a pouty Alessia trailing dejectedly behind you, your grin came easy, the comforting hold bringing you a sense of peace you didn’t expect.

You were immensely thankful to the older woman for not bringing attention to your probably red eyes, wordlessly steering you away from the living room where the boys were, and instead straight to the kitchen and into a bar stool before whipping around to fix you some dessert. 

Feeling the bar stool next to you screech as Alessia joined you, you shot her a small smile, nodding wordlessly to her questioning gaze. 

Reaching out to lock your pinkies together, you mouthed an ‘I promise’, settling Alessia’s worries before she made a move to intertwine your hands, soft smiles crossing both your faces. 

Getting abruptly pulled out of your little bubble as a plate was gently put in front of you, you couldn’t help the huge grin that crossed your face at the sight before you- two perfect edge pieces of a brownie topped with a hefty scoop of vanilla ice cream.

Pleasantly shocked at the fact that Alessia not only remembered that this was one of your favourite desserts, but mentioned it to her mother who made it without any fuss or guilt-tripping, your jaw dropped in awe for a split second, feeling your throat tighten in emotion briefly.

“Thank you.”

Your words were quiet, just barely audible even in the near-silence of the kitchen.

Even though Carol just smiled at you, beckoning for you to eat, you were sure she got the message, your two words more than just a quiet appreciation for her making you a plate. 

The tender moment was interrupted quickly though, Alessia quickly clocking in to the fact that there was only one plate and only one spoon. 

“Hey!”

Watching as Alessia yet again argued with her mother regarding you being the new favourite child of the household, you dug in, looking up with a content smile on your face as you watched Alessia grumble to herself as she got herself a brownie as well, faux-annoyance on her face as grabbed a spoon before making her way back to you. 

And as Gio and Luca realized that the brownies had come out of the oven, you watched as they tumbled in, immediately grabbing forks and completely ignoring the tray sitting on the counter, beelining it for Alessia’s plate. 

You laughed as the trio fought over Alessia’s dessert, amazed by the way the blonde immediately covered her plate with her hands, shielding it like a prized possession.

Mirth dancing in your eyes as the plate inevitably got snatched from beneath the striker’s protective hold and you easily held your plate out in consolation, a pout meeting your gaze as the blonde dejectedly took a bite whilst casting a dirty look to her brothers.

Pulling your stool closer to Alessia’s you wrapped an arm around her midsection, you leaned into the blonde as you both enjoyed your dessert, Gio and Luca entertaining you both as they decided to fight over another brownie.

Well amused, you turned towards Alessia with a proper smile adorning your face this time, leaning into the blonde and tucking your head into the crook of her neck as you closed your eyes and basked in the homey chaos.

Maybe this family thing didn't have to be so hard after all.

“I love you. Thank you.”

You whispered the words softly enough for only your girlfriend to hear them, placing a small kiss where your lips met her skin before cuddling further into her.

And with a quiet squeeze to your waist in return, accompanied by the three words repeated softly back to you, you knew the blonde understood exactly what you meant. 

Thank you for giving me a family I didn’t know I’d ever be worthy to have- for making a house feel like home.

[seeingivy]

logical

megumi fushiguro x f!reader

an: do not enable a megumi as olivia rodrigo songs series. because I will write a bad idea right? one with drunk asf megumi drunk calling the reader. anyways, this one is based off of logical HEHE

--

it’s quite simple. you refuse to go on a mission with megumi fushiguro. but of course, satoru gojo, sees no reason. which is why the two of you are sitting on the train together, knees brushing against each other in the silence. swelteringly uncomfortable - as you fidget with your hands and he types away on his phone - and you both bite the bullet on what to say. 

every thought that passes through your mind makes you hyperaware of that deep rooted, soft spot that you’re always going to hold for him - that despite all logical, rational thought - megumi fushiguro will always be scored on your heart in some way or another. 

you’re not sure what it’s a byproduct of. you’d love to write it off as something simple, something as trivial as first love. that he was simply the first person to shower you in love that way, to show you that it was real, and that this tenderness would quickly harden over when you found someone new. 

except as more days went on, almost a month since the two of you had fought and broken up, it was becoming more of a silent, naive hope of yours. because of course, the stupid cliches, not the ones that you wanted to be true, were of course the ones that were. that all rational thought, went out the window, when it came to megumi fushiguro. 

that distance made the heart grow fonder. that your heart longed for him every time you passed by him in the dorms and shared those awkward, pinched smiles instead of the soft, sweet ones that he only saved for you. that whenever nobara said something stupid or yuuji irritated nanami, that you’d both instinctively turn to look at each other and laugh, just to now do it on instinct and get a painful reminder. that you can’t, that you shouldn’t, turn to one another anymore. 

that it isn’t like that anymore. that you and megumi aren’t together anymore, and that of course, megumi could have any girl, so why would he possibly be with you?

“this is the stop.” 

you look up, noting that he broke the silence first, as you give him a nod and exit the train car with him. you keep a considerable distance as you two walk up to the abandoned elementary school and lift the veil. 

“emerge from the darkness, blacker than darkness. purify that which is impure.” you murmur, as you both give each other a curt nod and split onto other sides of the hallway. 

--

when the two of you make your way back on the train, megumi can’t wrack his brain on how you were able to tell. and that itching, guilty feeling that’s turning over in his stomach - associated with the crimson red blood that’s pouring down your cheek and his own shortcomings, as always. 

he had already shot a quick text to shoko, swallowing the guilt of waking her up in the middle of the night, to fix it the second that you got back. 

“quit feeling sorry for yourself.” 

megumi looks to your side, to find you folding his handkerchief, now coated in your blood, before you hand it back to him. 

“what?” 

“i can tell. that you’re brooding. but it was an honest mistake. that’s literally how the curse is supposed to work, y’know? it wouldn’t exactly be a curse otherwise.” you add. 

megumi frowns, his retort dying on his tongue. that it’s not an honest mistake, because if you were able to discern the truth, he should have been able to do so too. 

that when he was faced with it - that there were two manifestations of you, one that was the curse and one that was you - that he picked wrong. 

and that worst of all, the thing that he had struck, with full force, was you. that the crimson red blood that was leaking from your cheek was because he had lifted his hand on you, before the curse had doubled over and pushed him over too. 

when he came to, it was your turn. because standing to his left was another manifestation of him, so much so, that it left a lump in his throat at how much it looked like him. that when it was your turn to pick, you’d quickly sliced your sword straight through it’s stomach, like it was nothing instead of attacking him.

“i’m sorry that i did that to you.” he murmurs. 

you look over at him, at the clear disdain in his eyes for himself, as you deflate. 

“i wasn’t just saying that. that’s how the curse worked. you can’t exactly beat yourself up about it.” you respond. 

“you could tell. i should have been able to as well.” he states, rather curtly. 

you hum in response, that sickening soft spot burning. 

“well, you were never the mind reader were you?” you respond. 

he scoffs in response, the smallest makings of a smile on his face, as he lightly elbows you in the side. one of your stupid jokes, from your first date where you had dragged megumi to a tarot reader just for him to quite literally wish upon his death. you elbow him back, before you link your arm in with his and watch the way he deflates under your touch. 

megumi does it a few times, before you finally bit the bullet and ask him to speak. he opens his mouth, like he’s almost about to talk, before he stops himself short from ever doing it. 

“just ask.” 

megumi looks to your side, not even half shocked that you were able to tell. 

“how were you able to tell? that it wasn’t me?” 

“easy. that megumi was pleading me. told me that he loved me, all that.” 

“and?” 

“you wouldn’t do that.” you murmur, before you get off the train and march back to campus on your own. 

--

you see megumi again three days later. or more appropriately, you open the door and he barges into your room with a book secured under his hand. 

“just come in, i guess.” you murmur, irritated. 

it’s only when you turn around that you notice his haphazard appearance - that he’s panting, his cheeks are flushed, and that his hair is an unruly mess. you take the seat across from him, pinching your eyes at him, as he hands the book over to you. 

the five love languages. 

“what is this?” you ask. 

“i get it now. what i did wrong. why-why we aren’t together anymore.” 

you’re shocked at the bluntness in his word, that he’s willing to face it full on, as you take in his appearance. the pink near near his waterline and the darkness surrounding his eyes. 

“i was talking to gojo-sensei and-” 

“oh?” you respond, smirking at him. 

“shut up.” he grumbles back, flipping open to the book. 

“is this rock bottom for you? asking gojo-sensei for help of all people?” 

“if i say yes, will you let me continue?” he asks. 

“yes.” 

he glares, before sighing, and murmuring under his lips. 

“anyways. like i was saying, he gave me this book. and-and i get it now.” he states. 

he opens it up to the marked page, each of the little lines highlighted, with his handwriting scribbled on the side. 

quality time 

physical touch

acts of service 

receiving gifts

words of affirmation

you’re hyperaware of the fact that the last one, words of affirmation, has been circled and that megumi had neatly scribbled your name next to it on the line. 

“i don’t get it.” 

“it’s a thing in the book. that-” 

he swallows hard, the edges of his lips quivrering, before he talks again. 

“you can love someone but that person might not feel loved by you.” 

you turn your head to the side, in confusion, as you gesture for him to go on. 

“you feel most loved when i say it to you. and that’s not how i was showing love to you. it’s why you think i don’t love you.” megumi states. 

you scoff. 

“that’s not why we aren’t dating. we aren’t dating because you basically insinuated that you could have anyone but me. that i was lucky to be dating you.” you respond. 

his face curls up in anger, as he tightens his fists on the able. 

“when did i ever say that?”

“i asked you why you were so intent on the two of us staying together when all we do is hurt each other, i specifically asked you - how was i supposed to know that you loved me? and all you responded with was that there are lots of other girls out there and that you could easily have any of them. and then you had the audacity to try and kiss me after i tried to leave?” 

megumi deflates, fluttering his eyes closed in frustration, as he uncurls his fists on the table. he flips to the back of the book, before turning it over to you. 

“what the hell is this?” 

“it’s a quiz. you take it to figure out which language is yours. and it ranks them - from best to worst or whatever.” 

you look down at his results scribbled into the little lines. and at the fact that words of affirmation is dead last for him. 

“so?” 

“my love language is physical touch. that’s why, when i saw that you were upset, i was trying to make you feel better. in the way that i feel better.” 

he stops, the pink dusting on his cheeks, as he awkwardly looks down at his hands. 

“whenever you kiss me, i feel better. gojo-sensei can get on my nerves, nobara and yuuji can steal all my clothes, or…or i remember that my sister is dead and i feel better. when you hold my hand and trace those little shapes into my palms. or when you kiss my cheek. It-it’s stupid but-” 

“it’s not stupid.” 

“but for you. words are your thing. you-you have to hear them, right?” 

you deflate. 

“i guess, megumi. i would like to hear it sometimes. i know you’re not a big, talky feelings guy but…i’d just like the reminder sometimes. just so i know that-” 

“i love you.” 

you swallow hard, fighting the burning tears in your eyes, as you shake your head. 

“you could have any girl you wanted. you said it yourself.” 

megumi sighs, standing up from his side of the table, before he kneels at your side and leans his cheek against your shoulder. you can smell his soap, the irish spring smell enveloping your space. 

“you want to know how pathetic i am at this whole words thing?” 

“enlighten me.” 

“i was trying to say that…there are lots of other girls out there and i could easily have any of them. but the one i want is you.” 

you’re not sure what it is, more of the fact that the burden of hurt, right next to that soft spot of yours is slowly alleviating, but you can’t help but laugh in his face. at how ridiculous he is. 

“it’s not funny.” 

“megs! it’s kind of funny. in what world was i supposed to think that was what you meant?” 

“you’re the mind reader. you should have been able to tell.” 

you elbow him in the side, before you stand up, gesturing for him to stand up with you. and you loop your hands under his shoulder, leaning into his touch, hoping that it makes sense to him. that he understands that he’s forgiven. 

“i’m shocked you humbled yourself to gojo-sensei to ask for advice, megs.” 

“ugh. it was so embarrassing. but at least it was worthwhile.” 

“aw. you did that all for me?” you joke, pinching the side of his cheek. 

he smiles in response, leaning forward to press a kiss to the side of your cheek. 

“i’d do anything for you, if that much wasn’t clear. but i’ll keep reminding you if i have to. say it a hundred times, properly, if you need it.” 

you frown in response, giving him a nod, as you burrow your head into the softness of his neck and squeeze as hard as you can. 

“don’t start thinking i don’t want you to kiss me though. i don’t need kiss deprivation.” you whine. 

megumi laughs, pulling back, to tuck your hair behind your ear. he’s smiling ear to ear, so warm, that it makes your stomach rumble. 

“okay. what else?” 

“well, i still like gifts. and you and i should always be spending quality time together. and would it kill you to do something nice for me?” 

“so…you want me to do all of them?” 

“exactly!” you respond sarcastically, poking the side of his cheek. 

he reaches forward to flick your forehead, before he pads into your kitchen. 

“what are you doing?” 

“well, i’m making you dinner. that’s an act of service. and technically a gift too? and we’ll eat it together, so that’s quality time.” 

he quickly runs over and peppers three kisses over your face - one on your forehead and on each of your cheeks - before he continues. 

“that’s physical touch. and you’re the best thing that ever happened to me. words. that’s all five.” 

“you tag teamed two of them. that doesn’t count.” 

“okay, you can have my credit card and buy yourself something.” 

“that’s gojo-sensei’s credit card.” you deadpan. 

“shut up.” 

you roll your eyes, as you join him at his side in the kitchen. 

“i was joking, you know? you don’t actually have to make me dinner or do all of them.” you murmur. 

“i know that. i just want to.” 

you give him a smile, as the two of you shuffle around each other, and fix your plates together.

--

taglist:

@porridgesblog @k0z3me @kayleegomez @yihona-san06 @bsenpai @sweetenertea @skzismyhome  @mykyoon  @violetmatcha @rebeccawinters @shotenvinsoot @itzmeme  @gojoswifeyyys-world @cutiejg

[squirmhoney]

NIPPLE PLAY | SMUTMAS

Day six of Christmas | Aegon x nipple play Pairing: Aegon Targaryen x Reader Warning: Smut. Slightly dark. Naïve reader! Mean! Aegon. (Intended incest/intended niece/cousin reader) 18+ MDNI A/N: this is defo my fave to write. Also what I mean by intended was that in my head it was niece or cousin reader but I never explicitly say it so you can imagine what you want

You probably didn’t realise what you had been doing to Aegon. Completely clueless when you threw yourself on top of him, tits bouncing in his face as you straddled his lap. He was trying desperately to readjust himself underneath you without you noticing but it was hard when you were wriggling around,  making his cock beg to be pulled out of the restraints of his joggers. 

He didn’t even have time to sort himself out in a bathroom or his bedroom, too busy with all the Christmas activities with his family. So when he finally got to his bedroom that night, he was ready to get under the covers and wrap his hand around his cock. 

But he didn’t get to do that because you were slipping into his room like you always did when you stayed over. 

Aegon didn’t hold back a groan as you crawled under the covers, throwing his head back onto the pillows behind him. 

“What's wrong?” You pouted, eyeing his tense frame. 

“You,” He snapped. 

You were clearly taken aback, face dropping at that. “W-What did I do?” 

He pulled on the strap of your pyjamas, yanking the material down slightly as he openly stared at your cleavage. “Going around in barely nothing, flaunting your tits in my face and just- fuck,” he hissed under his breath, not wanting to draw attention to his bedroom. 

Your nose crinkled at him, eyebrows drawing in clear confusion. “I’m… sorry?” 

That naive nature of yours was starting to get on his last nerve. How could you be so dumb? He could only roll his eyes in annoyance and pinch the bridge of his nose, hoping he’d be able to calm down. 

“Aegon?” You grabbed his attention again, sounding not sure of yourself. “Is there some way I could make it up to you?” 

His eyes peeled open, cock leaking in his boxers as he thought of all the things you could do for him. “There is something.” 

He was playing with the strap of your pyjama top again, sliding down till it rested against the top of your breast. 

“It really is the least you can do,” he whispered, finger slipping into your top. “You going to be a good girl for me?” 

You nodded eagerly, wanting so badly to please him. 

He yanked your top down, uncovering your breasts finally for his eyes to see. 

You yelped out, covering yourself with your arms as you stared at him with widened eyes. 

“I thought you said you were going to be good,” Aegon growled, peeling your arms away from your body. “Now be fucking quiet and stop teasing me.” 

One thing about you was that you listened to Aegon when he told you to do something, especially when he was angry.  So with his heated tone sinking into your skin, you behaved obediently.  You bit down on your lip as Aegon held your tits in both hands, eyes darkening once he finally got to squeeze them. 

Aegon hadn't even started and he was already enjoying himself as he stared down at your tits. He massaged them like they were toys for his own amusement, mouth salivating at the sight before his eyes. When he sighed, you felt the breath fan across your nipples making them pebble up. 

“Sensitive, aren’t you?” Aegon chuckled. 

You hid your face in embarrassment, feeling completely flushed at the situation. 

“Don’t shy away.” 

He licked at your nipple, eyes staring up at your face as he watched your reaction. You were so squeamish and he couldn’t help repeating the action, watching you sigh at the sensation. 

“You’re so prett-mm.” He wrapped his mouth around one of your nipples, sucking on it and groaning at the feel of it in his mouth. 

You moaned, not realising the sound of it until it slipped past your lips. 

“Feeling good?” He asked, his tit still in your mouth. 

You parted your lips, nodding your head at him. 

“That’s what I like to hear.” 

Aegon couldn’t help himself, you moaning like this as he played with your tits, all spread out on his bed just so willing and ready for him to do anything to you. He needed to touch himself, hand reaching into his pants to finally release his cock from his boxers. He sighed into your skin as he wrapped a hand around his shaft, stroking it with pure desperation. 

He nibbled gently on your nipple before moving over to the next one, not wanting to give one more attention than the other. The feel of your nipple in his mouth, his tongue swirling around it as he fucked his fist was driving him insane. You were so sensitive as well. There was probably a pool in your shorts at him touching you like this, something he’d have to help you deal with later. 

He lost it when your fingers rested in his hair, scratching at his scalp as you lost yourself in your own bliss. He couldn’t even help himself, spilling out onto his hand with a deep groan against your skin. It felt good and he continuously pumped his cock till he was completely spent against you. 

For a second he was completely lost, breathing laboured as he fell slack against you. It wasn’t till he heard your soft voice shimper his name did he snap back to reality. 

He lifted his head, resting his chin on your chest to look at you. “Yes?” 

“I-Uh.” You were stumbling on your words, biting on your bottom lip.  

He had felt you clench your thighs underneath him, seeing you squirm around as you tried to get across how you were feeling. 

“It’s just-”

Aegon grinned, teeth winking at you in a predatory manner as he flicked one of your nipples. 

“Aegon,” you whined. 

“Need me to take care of you,” he pressed his hand against your shorts, feeling you already soaked through the material.

“Yes, please,” you pleaded as he rubbed his cum covered hand against your shorts, laughing when you bucked up into his hand. 

 “Now tell me if I do this, are you going to be naughty or nice?” 

[evansbby]

𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟒

part iv - just like animals

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: dark alpha!Steve Rogers x naive omega!Reader

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: smut, major angst, extremely dark themes, a/b/o dynamic, daddy!kink, dubcon, dumbification, bullying, breeding kink, pregnancy kink, size kink, housewife kink, semi-public sex, pussyjob, oral (f receiving),  extreme depictions of bullying and depression, 18+ only, minors do not interact!  

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: You begin to lose hope, and Steve begins to lose his mind.

Series Masterlist 

𝐀/𝐍: Another warning that the angsty content and certain themes in this chapter may be difficult to read. Warnings are there for a reason. Apart from that, thank you so much for being so patient. It took me more than 4 months to write this and it’s 22.2k words long. Enjoy.

Pregnant.

You stare so hard your vision blurs, until the two lines on the test are swimming around comically, almost as if they’re laughing at you. And then you’re blinking rapidly, because your eyes must be playing some kind of cruel trick, right? This can’t be real, this can’t be real, this can’t be real.

You’re pregnant. With Steve’s baby.

It’s with an almost detached silence that you get up and wrap all three tests in a big wad of toilet paper. Like you’re floating through the air, you stuff them under your shirt and make your way out of the room. With Steve still asleep, you venture downstairs and out the front door, the chilly morning air having no effect on you.

You bury the tests at the bottom of the garbage bin, like how you’re currently trying to bury all the emotions threatening to spill out of you. A baby. Inside you. Right at this moment. Steve’s baby. Your hand twitches, reaching up to touch your stomach before you stop yourself. What were you going to do now?

Steve reaches for you when you return to the bedroom, he looks half-asleep as he pulls you back into bed. You wonder whether here, cocooned in cosy warmth, you can just scrunch your eyes up real tight and pretend none of this is happening right now…

“Where did you go?”

“Steve, I… I’m…” Your throat constricts, and panic rises within you like bile as you try to regulate your breathing. “I just went downstairs to drink water.”

Steve hums, drawing you closer and burying his face in your neck while you lie completely still. As if any movement would somehow expose the fact that you’re pregnant. He peppers soft kisses onto your skin, tugging your shirt down to expose more of your neck.

“I’m gonna take you out for dinner tonight.” He says softly, and it’s the last thing you were expecting to hear from him right now. His lips drag up to kiss the corner of your mouth before moving down to your jaw, his hands stroking up and down your body as he holds you close. “You have an exam this morning, don’t you?”

You don’t know whether to laugh or cry at the fact that you’d forgotten you have an exam today.

“Y-Yeah.”

“Mm, so I’ll take you out after. Anywhere you want to go. We can even go shopping before that, I’ll buy you whatever you want.” Steve’s arms encircle around your waist, pulling you up as he rolls onto his back, so that you’re lying on his chest. He blinks up at you, blue eyes suddenly serious, “I want you to forget about everything that happened last night, omega.”

And just like that, it all comes rushing back to you. Like a hurtling freight train that had been momentarily kept at bay because you’d just found out you were pregnant. But now the memories come back at lightning speed. Bucky. Steve Junior. The fight. How Steve hadn’t defended you. How he’d left.

How he’d cheated on you.

How you’d begged him not to leave you.

“Forget all of it.” Steve repeats, cupping your face with both his hands. “None of that’s important anymore, as long as you’ll be good from now on.”

And just like that, he wants you to forget. Move on in a blink of an eye. Forget his cheating, his casual cruelty, how he’d laughed when you’d cried. How he’d told you every detail of his encounter with that other omega, how it had felt like you’d been punched in the gut repeatedly.

How could he expect you to forget? By pretending it never happened and distracting you with shopping trips, gifts and dinners? Was that his way of compensating? Didn’t he feel even a tiny bit of remorse? Could he even acknowledge how much he’d hurt you?

There’s a part of you, underneath all the newfound shock of being pregnant, that wants to confront him about all of it.

Instead, you nod mechanically. “Okay, Steve.”

“Good girl.” He kisses you a few more times before sitting up and setting you down next to him. “Pick a restaurant and text me, I’ll make the reservation.”

With baited breath, you watch him as he gets up, moving around the room to get ready for the day. You know that he’s got his morning run, then a gym session and then two exams back-to-back– which means you won’t see him until a lot later. Maybe it would give you enough time to gather your thoughts and make sense of your situation before you tell him.

***

Your own exam goes by in a blur. It doesn’t help that all you can think about is the fact that there’s literal life growing inside of you, but you somehow soldier through. With nerves mounting, you walk from the university building back to Steve’s house almost in a daze. Worries, questions, concerns, and fears swim around in your head like a school of frenzied fish. What are you going to do?

Acting on desperate impulse alone, you whip your phone out. Shaky fingers scroll desperately, searching for one blocked contact in particular. Almost in a frenzy, you tap on his name, unblocking him and calling him before you can change your mind.

“H-Hello? Peter?”

It takes a few moments for him to register that it’s you, and then:

“Oh my God. Are you okay?!”

The familiarity of Peter’s voice makes you want to cry, the sound bringing back fleeting memories of sitting on his sofa with a bowl of popcorn and a movie, complaining to him about all the alphas in your lectures. Playing computer games on his laptop and laughing when you beat him. Catching the bus to his house after days of not speaking to anyone at university, and the relief you’d feel when he’d open the door…

“I’m… I…Peter, I…”

You’re suddenly awash with shame. The last time you’d seen Peter, his face was spurting blood after being punched several times by Steve. And you hadn’t even bothered to call or text him after that, hadn’t bothered to see if he was okay. Granted, that was also the night Steve had mated you – oh, how could you ever explain all of this mess to Peter?

“Are you okay?” Peter repeats. “I tried to call so many times but you blocked me.” A pause, and then he adds: “Don’t worry, I realised that was probably Steve’s doing.”

You swallow harshly, “I should’ve called you. It’s just… He… He…” But you couldn’t blame it all on Steve, could you? In the past month and a half, it’s not like you’d gone out of your way to contact Peter. No, after Steve had mated you, it was like he’d consumed you, eaten you alive. Wrapped you up in this little bubble where it was just you and him and no one else mattered. A bubble you clearly had been in no hurry to escape from until it had popped unceremoniously all over your face.

“Is he treating you okay?” Peter’s question sounds tentative, as if he doesn’t quite believe his own words.

“No, Peter, I–” A strangled sob escapes your throat from out of nowhere, and you can feel the flimsy threads holding you together as they begin to come apart. “Everything’s a mess, a big fat mess and I don’t know what I’m going to do!”

“What happened? Did he hurt you?”

Why had you called him? How could you even begin to tell him everything you’d been through in the past twenty-four hours? Would Peter ultimately even care to listen to you complain about the man you’d cheated on him with? The man who you’d been living with for the past month, acting like his good little omega while pretending Peter no longer existed?

“It’s all a big mess.” You moan pathetically, hating yourself for how you sound. Here you were, hurt by one man and immediately trying to hurtle yourself into the arms of another. Stupid. Pathetic. Dumb. Careless. You’d gotten yourself into this mess. Just like Steve said – all your fault.

Your hand finds its way to your stomach, stroking it softly through the material of your dress. For a split second, you close your eyes and try and picture it. You, with a baby in your arms. Your very own baby – it looks exactly like you. And Steve coming home, smiling happily as he kisses you and takes your child, swinging it around while it giggles.

But like ink spilling on paper, the image darkens. Now it’s you alone with your baby. Cold, dark, dreary. Steve’s gone. He left you. Left you and left your baby. For that other omega. Left you just like how your dad left too. And it’s all your fault, all your fault, all your fault! Steve’s voice chanting in your head while your baby cries: all your fault, all your fault, all your fault!

“Hello? Are you still there?” Peter’s voice drags you out of your mind. “Look, just tell me what happened. I can help you. I know I wasn’t much help last time but I can help you now. We can figure something out, just tell me where you are, and–”

“I’m sorry,” You interrupt him, swallowing harshly. What had you hoped to achieve by calling your ex-boyfriend and telling him that your current boyfriend got you pregnant? No, you couldn’t do that to Peter. “Look, I don’t know why I called, I can’t drag you into my mess.”

“You haven’t even told me what the mess is–”

“I’m sorry, Peter.” You choke out before quickly hanging up. Methodically, you delete the call history and block his number once more. And then, it’s with almost mechanical grace that you wipe away your tears and clear your throat.

This is your mess. You have to handle it by yourself.

Still reeling from the impulsive phone-call and it’s abrupt ending, you walk the rest of the way back to Steve’s house in a daze of different emotions, wanting nothing more than to just escape your mind which seems to be working in overdrive. Reaching the front door, you’re about to twist the doorknob when you hear a click and the door swings open from the inside.

“Well, well, well. If it isn’t Little Miss Omega.” Words dripping with smug delight as if he’s caught you with your hand in the cookie jar, Bucky leans against the doorframe with his arms crossed over his chest and a wolfish grin on his face, “Was that you I just saw on the phone?”

You duck your head, hoping to just ignore the alpha, nudge past him and run up to yours’ and Steve’s bedroom. But Bucky easily blocks your path, leaving you standing outside on the porch and looking up at him in dismay. Again, you try to push past him but he’s too big, too strong, barely budging.

“I asked you a question. Who were you on the phone with? I bet Stevie doesn’t know, does he?”

Bucky intimidates you, with his light blue eyes and cold gaze. The way he’s always staring. And you don’t think you’ll ever forgive him for what he did to poor Steve Junior. Hands curling into fists by your sides, you can’t help but look to the ground, “I was talking to a friend about a textbook I’m looking for.”

“Nice try, sweetheart. Everyone knows you don’t have any friends.”

“Just let me in!” You try and be assertive, but shoving past him does you no good – just like Steve, he’s practically built like a brick wall.

“Let’s put it to a vote, shall we?” Bucky turns his head slightly, “Hey, Sam. Should I let little omega into the house?”

Over Bucky’s shoulder, you see Sam on the couch, feet propped up on the coffee table and a joint between his fingers, a slightly glazed look over his eyes. “I don’t give a fuck, man.”

“I’ll take that as a no. Sorry, sweetheart. I guess Steve should’ve trusted you with keys.” And you can’t believe it when the door slams in your face. You stand there in shock for a few seconds, wrapping your head around exactly what’s just happened. Overhead, the clouds grow darker and you hear a boom of thunder that has your chest tightening.

Hurriedly, you knock on the door once more, trying to persuade yourself that they’re just doing what they always do – acting like alpha jerks and joking around. Of course, they’ll let you in soon – they’d have to be heartless not to.

“Please let me in!” You call out, knocks becoming more incessant as panic begins to bubble inside of you – you’re not too fond of thunder, “Bucky, Sam, please! I think it’s gonna start raining!”

A rush of cold air has you shivering down to the bone, goosebumps rising up and down your limbs. It had been warm in the morning, so you’d worn only a light sundress – absolutely not ideal for the rainstorm that’s clearly about to hit.

“Guys, please!” You cry out again, and it comes out as a whimper. Bucky’s been awful as of late, but maybe Sam would grow irritated by your cries and come to open the door? That’s all you can hope for as you continue to slam your fists against the door harder and harder.

Suddenly, the door opens and you sag with relief until you see it’s Bucky again.

“L-Let me in. Please.” You hate that you have to beg him like this, after everything he’s said and done to you in the past. How he tore Steve Junior, how he called you a bitch in heat. Oh, how badly you wish Steve was here. But then, would Steve have even done anything at all?

Bucky tilts his head as if he’s pretending to think, “How about we strike up a bargain, sweetheart? You give me a kiss, and I’ll let you in.”

It’s as if someone’s dunked poison into your veins. Ugly, green poison that gives you a bad feeling and a bad taste all at once. You take a step back almost cautiously, “N-No.”

“You sure, omega?” Bucky licks his lips, pushing his brown hair out of his face as his gaze drinks you in hungrily. “It’s awfully cold out there, and nice and warm in here. All it’s gonna cost you is one kiss. And don’t worry, I won’t tell Steve.”

You jut your chin out, “No. I’m not going to kiss you. You’re Steve’s best friend, you shouldn’t be acting like this anyway.”

It’s like it’s all a game to him, because Bucky just smiles wickedly, reaching out to tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear. Revulsion overtakes your body, and you take another step back, blanching before giving him a pleading look.

“Acting like what? I told you, I won’t tell Steve.” He tries to grab you, but you’re quick to dodge him, “Come on, omega. It’s not like Steve’s gonna care anyways. I was there when he cheated on you. I didn’t understand it, if I had a hot piece of ass like you in my bed– I’d never do what he did.”

You bite your lip. The pain is still so fresh, the memory of Steve so nonchalantly telling you how he’d cheated on you, how he didn’t have a mark on his neck that tethered him to you. You’re crestfallen, but there’s a certain fury that awakens inside you too, because you hate how Bucky’s talking about it, you hate how he knows, you hate how he’s using it to his advantage.

“JUST SHUT UP!”

You’ve never yelled at an alpha like this before, your voice sounding over a clap of thunder that hits at that exact moment, “Shut up, okay? My relationship with Steve is none of your business. So just please, please leave me alone and let me in.” And once again you try to barge your way past him, pushing against his arm with all your strength but getting absolutely nowhere with it.

“Listen, you little bitch. Don’t fucking raise your voice at me.” Bucky is quick to grab your arm, twisting it roughly behind your back and making you cry out in pain. “And stop trying to act all high and mighty, like you’re above kissing me. You’re just a pathetic little scholarship slut omega, remember that.”

“Please! It hurts!”

“It hurts!” He mimics, face inches from yours as he sneers down at you, “When are you gonna realise that no one cares when you hurt? Least of all Steve.” His lips are so close to yours, and you can feel his breath on your face as he speaks, “So, what do you say about that kiss, hm, sweetheart? He cheated on you, now’s your chance to do the same. An eye for an eye.”

“No! I’m not going to kiss you, okay? I don’t want to!” You cry out, trying with all your might to wiggle out of his grasp until he cruelly pushes you away and you stumble down the front steps of the house.

“Fine. Suit yourself, omega slut.”

And the door slams shut again, followed by the unmistakable click of the lock. And this time, you know Bucky isn’t coming back to open it. Another clap of thunder, a ripple of lightning and now heavy rain is falling down in earnest. For a few seconds, you just watch in disbelief as the icy cold water soaks through your clothes.

Then you run up against the window, pounding on it, hoping that maybe Sam will let you in. But Sam looks like he’s passed out on the couch and dead to the world around him. And Bucky just sits there, cigarette in mouth and phone in hand, pretending as if he hasn’t just heartlessly locked you outside in the heavy rainfall.

And the rain is unforgiving, so cold as it pelts downwards. Fat droplets of icy water beating down on your head – it’s already soaked through your dress and everything from your hair to your phone is dripping wet.

Once more, you slam your fists on the door, yelling out both their names, begging and pleading to be let in. You shake and rattle the doorknob, you pound at the glass of the window, at one point you even hurl your whole body into the door to maybe break it open – but to no avail.

“Please! It’s c-cold out here!” Your voice comes out hoarse from all the pleading you’ve been doing, and you can’t tell whether it’s rainwater or tears smeared all over your face, “Please let me in! I d-don’t know what I did to you but please, just let me in!”

It’s in the middle of your hundredth ‘please’ that you finally stop, clamping your shivering mouth shut because what’s the point? All this begging, all this pleading, just in the hopes that the two worst people you know might feel sorry for you? When they never have in the past? When they’ve been awful to you every chance they got, despite the fact that you’ve been nothing but polite to them?

No. Bucky and Sam don’t deserve your begging.

You find yourself sinking down on the steps. You contemplate calling Steve, but one glance at the black screen of your phone and you know it’s either dead or the rainwater got to it.

The library was closed for maintenance, and walking to the nearest campus building would be impossible in this rain. Even your old dorm is out of the question, because Steve has the keys to it. And slowly, as the cold numbness begins to spread across your fingertips and up your arms, you feel a sudden numbness in your mind too.

This despairing feeling of no hope, cruelly snatching away any need to survive. You feel your body switch off, the feeling of deadly indifference overtaking you. You bury your head between your legs, wrapping your arms around yourself to preserve any body-heat.

Steve should be home by now... But he isn’t, he isn’t, he isn’t! The voice inside you mocks. He’s probably with that other omega…Cosy in her dorm room, probably kissing her…

You don’t know how long you sit there in the pounding rain, feeling it beat unforgivingly down your head and back. A part of you wants to drown in the rainwater, or let it wash you away and take you somewhere far. Somewhere where it isn’t so wet and so cold, where everyone isn’t so horrible.

The car headlights don’t really register in your head, and neither does the rough hand that grabs your arm a few moments later, shaking you and calling out your name repeatedly. You just keep your head in your lap, hoping and praying that the cold goes away.

“Can you hear me? What the fuck are you doing out here?” Steve demands, grabbing both your shoulders now and shaking them heftily, making you look up slowly and blink. Your vision is completely blurred, and again it’s either from the rain or your tears – you don’t know. But you see Steve’s halo of blonde hair glimmering in the rain, and the furrow of his brow.

You open your mouth but nothing comes out as Steve yanks you up to your feet, pulling you towards the door.

“Did you hear what I just asked you? What are you doing out here in the rain? Are you insane?” He has to raise his voice to be heard above the deathly patter.

“W-Wouldn’t let me in.” You mumble faintly as Steve fishes for his keys, pulling them out of his pocket and unlocking the door in record time, pushing you inside before following you.

“What?” He repeats once you’re both inside, “What did you say?”

The warmth is immediate but you feel no relief – just that same numbness from before. You’re dripping all over the floor, cold beyond belief as you look down at your ruined shoes.

“Th-They wouldn’t let me in.”

It comes out so quiet, so pitiful, so weak and resigned. Because you know he won’t care, that he’ll downplay it. But Steve’s blue eyes blaze with fury once realisation sets in. Face red and knuckles white, he turns to the living room. You must’ve been outside for a while because Sam is gone, and there’s only Bucky who sits with his feet reclined on the coffee table, casually typing away on his phone.

“What the fuck is wrong with you, asshole?” Steve roars, striding into the living room and grabbing Bucky by the collar, yanking him up to his feet.

“Hey, hey, let the fuck go of me.” Bucky’s got a glare on his face as the blond alpha slams him against the wall, “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“Don’t act fucking stupid,” Steve sneers, “She was outside in the rain for God knows how fucking long. Look at her. She said you wouldn’t let her in.”

Bucky’s gaze shifts towards you, and you know you look like a dishevelled, soaking mess. There’s a split second where his eyes widen, and his throat bobs as he swallows. Then he blinks, that familiarly cruel smirk returning, “Oh. I guess I didn’t hear her knock.”

“Bullshit.”

“What’s going on–?” Sam chooses that moment to come thudding down the stairs. He stops short when he sees you shivering at the landing and the sizable puddle of rainwater by your feet.

“Why would you do it?” Steve slams Bucky against the wall once more, and you don’t think you’ve ever seen him this angry. Except the night he mated you.

“Relax the fuck out. It was a joke. Don’t act like you haven’t done shit like this before.”

“Don’t fucking joke with her.”

“I’ll joke with whoever the fuck I want, asshole. Just like how you used to,” Bucky sneers, “before you got yourself whipped on that omega slut.”

The look on Steve’s face is one of absolute livid fury, and he’s about to draw his fist back when–

“Steve, she looks like she’s hypothermic or something.” It’s Sam who speaks, stepping forward and swiftly coming between them. Steve glances at you before looking back at Bucky, giving the brunet one last menacing look before shoving him, then shoving Sam and making his way over to you.

“Both of you can go to hell.” He mutters, blue eyes still filled with rage as he grabs your arm. He inhales sharply, as if stung by how cold your skin feels. And ‘feel’ is a strong word because what you can’t feel is your toes, your fingers, the tip of your nose. And you can’t stop the violent, body-wracking shivers as your body fails to heat itself up.

Steve tries to pull you up the stairs, but it’s like you’re a solid block of ice – half frozen from cold and from the shock of everything that’s happened. Eventually, he just picks you up, carrying you up the stairs as you remain stiff in his arms.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” you repeat the words in choked whispers till they lose meaning. And you don’t know what you’re apologising for, but you know Steve’s angry. Which means he’ll be angry at you – maybe for making him fight with his friends? Causing a huge commotion because you cried like a baby for being locked outside? Would he blame you again, tell you it’s all your fault?

Would he leave you?

“I’m s-s-sorry,” you can’t keep your teeth from chattering but you keep repeating it nonetheless, scared of what he might do, what your punishment will be, as he carries you up into his room, slamming the door shut behind him.

You risk a look up at his face. There’s still anger in his eyes as he scans over your body, the way you’re trembling in his arms, cold fingers gripping onto him tightly. And for a moment, he just stands there. Stands there in the middle of his room as if he has no idea what to do, almost as if he’s at a loss.

“You’re really cold.” It’s all he says, and then he carries you into the bathroom, easily holding you close with one arm, and manoeuvring the other to open the tap and fill the bathtub with scalding hot water. You can see the steam rising invitingly, but it’s like all hope’s been snuffed out from within you – you don’t really care about getting warm anymore.

“A-A-Are you m-mad at me?” You ask Steve quietly, but maybe it’s too quiet, or maybe you asked it in your head because he doesn’t respond. Instead, he gently puts you down on your feet, unzipping your dress and taking it off, and then your shoes and sopping wet socks too. That’s when you realise you can’t feel your toes either.

The bath is boiling hot but it only feels lukewarm against your poor, cold-stricken body. He’s filled it up till the brim, so you sit there with your chin resting on your knees and arms wrapped around your legs protectively, as if any moment he’s going to turn on you, yell at you, tell you it’s your fault. And then you expect Steve to leave, and he almost does once he turns the faucet off. But he hesitates at the doorway, as if he’s afraid to leave you alone in the bathroom.

Finally, he decides to stay, sitting down on the floor next to the bathtub, his eyes glued to you. But the anger seems to be gone (or maybe he’s hiding it?). For a long while, no one says anything. And it’s there, in Steve’s bathroom as you sit in the scalding water, that something seems to break inside of you. As if any will you may have had has been sapped out of your body, leaving just a shell behind.

Steve clears his throat, “Are you still cold?”

Silence.

“Omega. Answer me.”

You don’t. Or you can’t. He seems far away.

“Do you want me to make the water hotter?”

Why is he being nice? Is it an act? Is he trying to trick you? Why hasn’t he punished you yet? This is all your fault, isn’t it? Isn’t it?

You stare straight ahead at the tiled wall in front of you. It’s black and white marble. Minimalistic. A simple pattern.

“Is there something written on my face that makes people to treat me like crap?”

It’s you who speaks – but you almost don’t recognise it. Clear, void of any emotion and no stutter. You feel like a ghost, out of your own body and watching yourself from a corner, resigned and not caring what happens next.

And Steve seems slightly taken aback – maybe he expected you not to speak at all. Maybe he only expected you to cry like you always do. But it’s as if you’ve cried all the tears you possibly can, and your body has no more left to give. It’s like you have nothing left inside you to give.

“They shouldn’t have done that.” Steve says darkly, “I’ll make sure they don’t pull shit like that ever again.”

You blink, but don’t respond. You know in your heart that you don’t believe him – not when he picks and chooses when to defend you.

“Is there something so glaringly wrong with me, that it makes people treat me like shit? You should know if there is, because you’re the one who started it, Steve. They wouldn’t be bullying me – no one would be bullying me – if it weren’t for you.”

You feel nothing as you say it, almost as if your body’s given up on protecting you; your tongue allowing you to say things that you’ve only ever dared to think about before. You were profusely apologising to him not five minutes ago, but now it’s like you can’t stop yourself from saying what’s been festering at the back of your mind for who knows how long. But your tone isn’t accusatory, just monotonous. You focus on the pattern on the wall – black, white, black, white, black, white. One white tile has a crack in it. A small one, but it’s there.

“Why did you bully me, Steve? What did I ever do to you, except keep my head down and mind my own business? Did you hate me that much? Do they hate me that much?”

Through your peripheral, you can see him holding his head in his hands for a second. And then he looks up, does that thing where he runs his hands through his hair. Eyes squeezed shut for a second, he opens them and looks down at you, and his hand hovers in the air for a second as if to grab yours, only to snatch it back at the last second.

“I don’t hate you.”

“Why did you treat me so awful, then? And persuade everyone else to do the same?”

Silence. No answer. But it’s not like you expected any different. You fold more within yourself, hugging your knees closer to your chest and letting a huge wave of shivers overtake you.

“Can you just… Could I be alone, please?”

He doesn’t budge even an inch, and again you get the feeling like he’s scared to leave you by yourself. But it feels even more alien when his hand comes up to stroke your hair back. The omega inside you sings for his touch but for once it’s like the numbness within you is overshadowing your base omega desires. You duck away from his hand, making him freeze and snatch it back once again.

After a few beats of silence, you speak once more.

“It’s me, isn’t it? There’s something about me that people just don’t like.  No matter how hard I try, how nice I act – it always seems to come back and slap me in the face.”

Steve, his tongue always ready with cajoling words and sweet nothings, seems to have nothing to say. You’ll never figure out how to read his expressions, but his brow is furrowed and lips pressed into a thin line.

“I’ve kept quiet all my life, kept my head down, kept out of everyone’s way – but none of it works.” You meet his gaze, that forever unreadable look; “Please… Please tell me why it never works?”

“I told you; I’ll make sure they never do shit like that again. You won’t have to worry anymore; I’ll make sure they don’t even speak to you–”

“You told me once that nobody cares about me.” You pick at your nails, sounding both broken and matter-of-fact at the same time, thinking back to Bucky’s words from earlier: No one cares if you hurt. “And you’re… you’re right, Steve. No one really does, otherwise Bucky and Sam would have just let me in. And no one would’ve ever bullied me. And… And my mom would answer my texts, and…” A sudden wave of anguish washes over you, “And my dad wouldn’t have left me.”

You don’t know why you’re telling him this now, but it seems like everything’s finally connecting in your head – everyone will leave you, even Steve. The alpha sucks in his breath, and again it’s like his fingers are dancing, creeping over to grab your hand that lays limply on the rim of the bathtub. And this time, he does, squeezing tightly except you’re so emotionally numb that you can’t even feel it.

“You know he left because he wanted a boy? An alpha? You were right, he didn’t care about me, left before my first birthday.” The pain associated with the one thing you never talk about, that you never even think about, is so strong that it almost winds you, and it makes your heart hurt. “N-Now he has a new family. Two sons. He even has a daughter, but I don’t think he’d ever leave her like he left me.”

Steve’s grip on your hand tightens, and you hear this growling sound that comes from his chest. But you’re so far down this well made up of your own pain and anguish, that it’s like Steve’s almost not even there.

“I don’t think my mom ever forgave me for him leaving. And you were right when you said that she doesn’t care about me either. I don’t remember the last time she called me, or even texted to check up on me.” You look up to see him open his mouth to speak but you beat him to it, “Steve, sometimes I… sometimes I hate myself for being like this, for driving everyone away.”

Steve whips his blonde hair out of his face, suddenly sitting up straighter and eyes molten blue with new heat, shoulders squared as if he’s defensive, “Don’t say shit like that.”

“But it’s true. And I drove you away too. To that other omega.” And now fresh anguish cuts through, splicing you open like a knife, the same pain you felt the moment Steve told you he’d kissed someone else.

“You didn’t drive me away–”

“That’s what you told me. You said it was my fault. And it was, and I made you cheat on me. All my fault – that’s what you said.”

“I didn’t mean–” He grabs your face, hands rough and calloused but so familiar, as if a thousand others could touch you at the same time but his touch is the only one you could ever recognise. Face inches from yours and intense gaze boring into you, he exhales sharply, “I didn’t cheat on you, omega. I don’t think you understand what cheating means, but kissing someone is not–”

“I’m not dumb.” You interrupt, and it’s funny because you wouldn’t have dared to ever interrupt him before now. But it’s like you’re a ghost, outside of your own body and long past the point of caring. “Maybe I’m a bit naïve but I know what cheating is.” Tears would’ve been flowing down your cheeks at this point, had you any tears left to cry, “And you know the worst part? You laughed as you told me.”

Steve shuts his eyes again for a second, really scrunches them up and you can see the furrow of his brow, the clench of his jaw. But you don’t know what any of it even means – is he angry with you? Annoyed? Irritated? Do you care?

“It didn’t mean anything with her. I came home to you in the end.”

It meant everything to me! You want to yell, but instead you sink down lower into the water, wanting it to swallow you up, pull you down the drain and away from everything. But strong hands grip your forearms, jerking you back up almost immediately. You suck in your breath before turning to face him, properly face him, “You still kissed her. And you– you gloated about it; told me it was my fault. N-Now you’re gonna leave me just like my dad did. Leave me for her.”

Steve shakes his head, his knuckles white from gripping your shoulders so tightly, “I don’t even remember her face.” He lifts you out of the tub, and you don’t even struggle because what’s the point? The fight seems to have left your body completely. He places you on his lap, naked and wet and trembling, strong arms encircling around you as they’ve done a thousand times before when he’s ready to sway you with his sweet words, “Omega. Listen to me, she meant nothing to me.”

“I don’t think I mean anything to you either.” It’s both an observation and a realisation. All these weeks of trying to persuade yourself that Steve has changed, that Steve’s good to you now, that surely Steve wouldn’t treat you how he treated Sharon. It’s a delayed reaction, but now you’re sure of it. As Bucky said: no one cares if you hurt. Least of all, Steve.

“You mean everyth–” Steve cuts himself off with another deep inhale, the muscles and veins in his neck tensing, “You mean a lot to me–”

“Don’t,” You interrupt him again, “Don’t say things you don’t mean, Steve. You do it all the time and I’ll always believe it – and it’ll all be a lie because it always is.” You shake your head, looking up into his shadowed blue eyes and feeling that lurch in your heart you always feel. “I’ll always fall for your words, Steve. Because you made me fall for you.”

A surge of indescribable anger overtakes you, washing over you like a tidal wave, drenching your already wet body in confused, accusatory rage. Feebly, as if testing the waters, you shove him. It’s a slight push against his chest, but then you do it again with a little more strength. And then again. He’s so strong, so big, so well-built, that he doesn’t even budge but you push him again anyways.

“I hate you for making me fall for you, even though you treated me like dirt at the bottom of your shoe!” You cry, shoving him harder while all Steve does is stare at you with that damned unreadable expression, “I hate you for not standing up for me,” Another shove, harder this time, and then another one, “I hate you for cheating on me, for laughing while you watched me cry. I hate you for making me care so much that it felt like my whole world ended when you told me you kissed her!”

Again and again, you hit him; and every time he just lets you do it. Not even raising a hand to defend himself, just allowing your pushes, slaps, punches and shoves to slam against his shoulders and chest. And everything’s a blur to you, black and white bathroom tiles melting into the blues in Steve’s eyes, and again you shove him, harder and harder, not even knowing you had this animosity inside of you until it came pouring out.

“I hate you for bonding with me when you don’t even care about me. Hate you for making me beg you not to leave me, hate you, hate you, I hate you!” Louder and louder your voice gets, till it’s bouncing off the walls of the bathroom, and you think you see a chip in Steve’s stoic expression when he winces, and you hit him even harder. You’ve never hit anyone in your life but it’s like you can’t stop, this animalistic anger radiating off you in waves.

He catches your fists in his hands easily, as easily as he’s crushed and stomped on your trust and feelings in the past. And he pulls you into him, muscular arms wrapping around you, clutching you to his chest, holding you there while you struggle against him, shove and punch and push, until you finally stop.

“I don’t hate you,” You whisper in defeat, “I can’t hate you – no matter how hard I try, no matter how much I should. I wish I did, but I can’t.” You lower your fists, sagging against his chest in defeat, voice breaking as finally, finally, the tears begin to fall. “Can’t hate you, Steve. Not even a little bit.”

Everything’s still. You. Him. The water in the bathtub. And then:

“I won’t hurt you again.” Steve’s voice comes out oddly thick.

“You’ll leave me.”

“I won’t.”

You stare at your hands, fingers shrivelled from the water, trembling from all the screaming you’ve just done, “Don’t believe you anymore.”

Steve sucks in his breath, and you look up to see him tug at his sweater, pulling it down to expose his neck, pale yet so thick and veiny, connecting to his muscular shoulders. He tilts his head slightly, eyes dark and deathly serious, blinking rapidly with a desperation that you’ve never seen on him before.

“Mark me too.”

Your head whips up, heart skipping several beats. Desperately, you search his face for a sign that he’s joking, that he’s about to laugh in your face. It’s almost instinctive to do that now – you don’t trust him; you don’t believe him. Despite the fact that there seems to be sincerity written on his features, you can see it brimming in his eyes that glow in the dim light of the bathroom, in his lips which practically purse with anticipation.

You don’t know what to say.

“Mark me too, omega. Like how I marked you. I don’t give a fuck about anyone else; I only want you. So claim me, if it’ll make you feel better. I’ll be yours just like how you’re mine.”

You gulp. Steve’s all about grand gestures and sweet words, but could he really mean it? When he’s barely said anything this whole time you’ve poured your frustrations out to him? For a moment, a wild nano-second, the feral omega within you wants to surge forward and bite him hard, claim him how he claimed you that fateful night a month or so ago. Make him hurt how he made you hurt the night he claimed you. Make him yours, and maybe, just maybe, you’d finally be happy?

But then you wilt, like all your feelings have rushed to a standstill and taken a nosedive down to the depths of your own mind. Dark doubts, insecurities, mistrust, hopelessness – all of that seems to overtake any innate desire you have to mate him right back. Clearly, the bond you both shared meant nothing to him when he’d cheated on you. What difference could your measly bite-mark on his neck really make?

“Make me yours.” He repeats.

“You’ll never be mine.” You shrink back within yourself, like a candle that’s been snuffed out, or a balloon that’s slowly deflating.

Steve blinks as if he can’t quite believe it, and you feel a peculiar wavering in your bond. “I don’t understand,” He says slowly, “I’m giving you permission to mark me, omega. Not anyone else, just you. So do it. Mark me.”

You bow your head, shaking it slowly, “I’m tired, Steve.”

There’s a certain pull that you feel in your bond with him, a heaviness in the connection you share. You’ve never felt it before. Hurt. It’s almost as if he’s hurt. Could Steve possibly be hurt? But the feeling is fleeting, glimmering slightly before disappearing altogether, making you think you imagined it to begin with.

No more words are shared between you as he helps you to your feet, wrapping his large black towel around you before guiding you back to the bedroom. Like you’re a kicked and injured puppy who needs him. You wonder if you’ll ever not need him.

You feel nothing as he pulls his old football jersey over your head. It’s your favourite one, the one with all the holes in it that smells so much like him. His lucky jersey, he’d told you once. But even the omega inside of you has quietened down, and you still feel so numb. Numb and cold. And hopeless. Even the bed doesn’t bring you any comfort as Steve tucks you in.

He sits by your side, stroking your hair. You struggle to keep your eyes open, the dark depths of sleep tugging you in, and you wonder what fresh nightmares await inside your head. Steve leaving you? Leaving you and your unborn child? You’re already half asleep when you think you hear him speak again, in an oddly gentle tone:

“When I kissed her, I closed my eyes and pretended it was you.” A pause, as if he’s mulling whether to say his next words, “You’re all I think about – and I think about you so goddamned much, it feels like I’m going insane. I can’t even look at another girl, all I see is you.”

It’s through the throes of sleep that you answer:

“Don’t believe you, Steve. Don’t trust you. How can we raise a chil–”

But even in your half-asleep state, your voice knows to trail off. You know what you were about to say: How can we raise a child together when I don’t even trust you? But you can’t tell him about the baby, not when everything is so uncertain.

Sleep pulls you into unconsciousness. Dark and quiet, you dream of nothing.

***

The next few days feel like you’re living in some sort of limbo, with things between you and Steve quieter than a pin dropping. There seems to be change in the foreboding alpha who used to make your heart stop every time he looked at you. Now, he teeters between a range of different emotions. Like masks – quickly exchanging one for the other. Wary – as if you’re made out of glass. Apologetic – except he’s yet to actually say sorry. Cautious – as if he thinks you might do something to hurt yourself. Angry – not directly at you but it scares you anyways.

And sometimes you don’t recognise him – but did you ever truly know him to begin with? And you also don’t recognise yourself. You feel like a snuffed-out candle and you don’t know what to do with yourself. Steve’s room suddenly feel suffocating, but where else are you supposed to go?

But it’s like there’s an invisible barrier stopping you from leaving his room. The fear of running into Bucky is the biggest barrier, and so everything else comes to a standstill. Cleaning, laundry, all the little things you used to do around the house for Steve and yourself. Things you didn’t even realise had become routine until now. You barely go into the kitchen anymore, with Steve now bringing food up to his bedroom for the two of you.

Soon, your end-of-year exams finish, and looking out onto campus through your window, you can see other students packing up and leaving. Laughing and hugging their parents who show up in pick-up trucks and moving vans. Friends saying tearful goodbyes because everyone’s going home for the summer. Is that what you should do? Go home? When your mother hasn’t given you a call in more than a few months now?

One day, you’re staring listlessly out the window when you hear a knock on the door. Turning your head ever-so-slightly, your eyes meet with Sam’s.

“Steve isn’t here.”

“I know. I wanted to speak to you.” Sam steps into the room, leaving the door slightly ajar behind him. Your breath hitches in your throat, and the alpha scoffs when you get up and take a step backwards, “Relax. I’m not going to hurt you.”

It’s less a fear of Sam and more a fear of something bad inevitably happening that makes you swallow harshly. Sam isn’t as bad as Bucky but he was still awful to you, still said the meanest things to you and had done nothing when Bucky locked you out of the house. So, your body is on high-alert as you gaze warily at him now.

“Go away.” You don’t want to beg him, but you don’t have the willpower to even try to be assertive anymore. It’s not like any of the alphas in this house ever listen to you, anyways. “Just go away, okay? I have nothing to say to you.”

Sam scowls at the floor, kicking the carpet before inhaling deeply and looking up to meet your eyes. Why is he here? To ridicule you? Berate you? Laugh at you? Do you even care anymore?

“I’m sorry, okay?” He blurts out, the words tumbling out of his mouth so quickly that you’re stunned for a second, unsure if you’ve heard him correctly. Sam himself looks stunned, and you get the feeling that he’s never apologised to anyone before, let alone an omega. And nobody’s ever apologised to you before, not any of the alphas who’ve bulled you. Not Steve. And certainly not Bucky.

Sam takes a step closer to you, and this time you don’t flinch away.

“Look, I won’t pretend I’m a saint, okay? I know I’ve never been nice to you… But things went too far the other day and I’m man enough to admit that.” He’s still speaking fast, as if he wants to get it all out before he changes his mind.

Should you trust him?

“And I don’t know what the fuck came over Bucky that night,” Sam continues, shoving his hands in his pockets, “Usually he’s the nicest out of the three of us. And I was high as fuck that night, I thought he’d let you in eventually, so I just went upstairs. But whatever, I’m not making any excuses for him or myself.”

You exhale slowly, willing yourself to look up at his face, search for even an ounce of laughter, or a twitch of a smile – any hint that this is all a sick joke.

“So, consider this an apology. And you don’t have to say anything, and you don’t have to forgive me. But just know that you won’t be getting that sort of treatment from me anymore.”

Silence. Except your mind’s working in overdrive: should you trust him? Should you believe him? Did you even want to forgive him? Does this apology make up for all the verbal abuse, berating and bullying that you’ve suffered, with him being one of the main perpetrators? Did his apology even matter anymore, when the damage was already done?

You never get a chance to respond because Steve walks in at that very moment. The blond alpha freezes at the doorway, a bouquet of yellow roses clenched in his hand and a frown quickly forming on his face. His blue eyes narrow as he looks from you to Sam, who’s standing only about a foot away from you.

“Get away from her before I fucking kill you.”

There’s a flurry of movement, the yellow roses drop to the floor and it takes Steve only two strides to cross the room and stand between you and the other alpha.

Sam raises an eyebrow, “Chill out. I only came in here to–”

“Get out.” Steve is curt and seething at the same time, and for a moment it looks like Sam’s about to square up. He opens his mouth to speak before clamping it shut and shaking his head.

“I’m so fucking done with this bullshit.” Sam says under his breath before exiting the room, leaving you alone with the sound of Steve’s rapid breathing as your alpha whips around to stare you down. Your heart lurches when he grabs you by the shoulders, shaking you while those blue eyes never leave your face.

“You were gonna fuck him, weren’t you?”

Your jaw drops at how ludicrous his accusation is, how shockingly unbelievable.

“Wh-What? No, I wasn’t–”

“Don’t lie to me.” With clenched teeth and eyes that look half crazed, you see his pupils darting around as if trying to find the truth in your face. Jaw clenching and unclenching, he squeezes your shoulders and shakes you again, “Don’t think I don’t know what game you’re playing. You think you can cheat on me just because I cheated on you?”

“No–”

“You think you could ever get away with that?” Blonde hair falling over his forehead, eyes bloodshot with anger, he looks like he’s teetering at the edge of his own sanity. “You think you could just hook up with someone else as some sick form of revenge on me, do you?”

“Steve, no–”

“Where’s your phone?” Steve looks incensed, eyes scanning the room like a man possessed. Grabbing it from on top of the dresser, he goes through it quickly. Like he’s done a thousand times before, except this time it’s like he knows he’ll find something. You thank your lucky stars that you deleted the phone call with Peter from your call history – not that that counted as cheating in the slightest.

His frown grows deeper as he opens every app, scrolls through every chat, scours through your call logs. But you feel an eery since of calm – which is the opposite of Steve who looks like he’s about to explode with whatever mad anger that’s suddenly consumed him.

“Don’t you fucking think you can go behind my fucking back, you got that? Especially not with my friends, or that fucking scum beta ex of yours.” He throws your phone down on the bed, clearly having found zero evidence to back his absurd claims, but it doesn’t stop him from glowering at you.

“Listen to me very carefully, omega.” Steve scrunches your face between his thumb and fingers, his expression so intense it chills your blood. “You’re mine. I’m your alpha and I own you. That’s never going to change. If you ever cheat on me, I’ll kill him. And you too.”

He slams his lips against yours in a kiss so bruising, you feel your lips burn. And this kiss is different, you can almost taste the desperation as he moves his tongue against yours. As he holds you close to him so tightly that it hurts, and you can’t breathe, and you feel like he’s never going to let you go.

You fight the urge to kiss him back – because even now, that urge is still there. It’ll always be there. Palms press desperately against his hard chest in a bid to push him away.

“I wouldn’t do that to you!” You cry out as you pull away, “I would never deliberately hurt someone I care about, Steve. I’m not you!”

He lets go of you as suddenly as he’d grabbed you, breathing hard and still seething. And it’s almost like you’re really seeing him now. Steve, who was always so poised, so smooth as he clinically seamed his words together in the past. But now? The distant, crazed look in his eyes, the dishevelled features, hair unkempt, jaw tense, lips bitten and pursed. He’s always been beautiful but there’s an unpredictable edge to him now that maybe wasn’t there before.

Was the alpha losing control?

He backs away, fists clenched at his sides and that intense and crazed expression still on his face. You both stare at each other, it feels like your heart’s about to thud out of your chest. And then abruptly, he turns and strides out of the room, stepping over the bouquet of yellow roses that lay trampled and dejected on the ground.

***

The days all start looking the same. You’re so stationary in Steve’s room yet you feel like you’re running. Constantly running and hiding from the responsibility of the child growing inside of you. Tell him, tell alpha! He deserves to know! The omega inside of you shrieks and croons, but something’s stopping you from doing it. There’s a mountain of problems surrounding you and Steve – where would a baby fit in all of that?

The silence between the two of you grows louder as each day passes. Barely any words spoken, and a certain awkwardness that was never there before – certainly never from Steve himself. Yet despite all that, every night he holds you while you sleep. And every morning, you wake up in his warm embrace. And it’s only in those moments, in the quiet of the night with the weight of his arms around you, that you can pretend everything’s okay.

And then one day, Steve walks into the room and sits next to you on the bed. You think nothing of it, barely glancing at him before going back to examining the pattern of the duvet cover.

“Omega.” Steve says, but as usual he seems so far away. And it’s almost like you don’t have the energy to acknowledge him, even when he grabs your hand and squeezes it. It’s only when he says your name – your real name – that you look up. He barely ever calls you that.

“Have you eaten today?” He asks, a frown adorning his features when you shake your head listlessly. You’d attempted to go down to the kitchen earlier, but upon hearing Bucky’s voice you’d turned and come straight back into the bedroom, heart pitter-pattering and a sinking feeling in your chest.

He takes out a wrapped deli sandwich and a bottle of water from his gym bag. His blue eyes watch you like a hawk as you slowly take a sip of water and tear off a bit of the sandwich, chewing softly. It tastes like nothing, but you figure it’s better to just keep quiet and eat it – since you’re meant to be eating for two now anyways. And just that thought sends shivers down your spine – how long can you pretend not to acknowledge the existence of the baby growing inside of you? How long before you have to tell him?

Steve clears his throat, “Look, I know things have been…” His voice trails off as he watches you tear off tiny pieces of your sandwich, staring into your lap because you just can’t seem to look at him. He shifts around, and you feel a spark of unease in the bond you share with him.

“I got you something.” He says finally, reaching into his gym bag a second time, he takes something out and throws it into your lap.

The fur looks worn out and one ear is missing, and you can see the haphazard stitches on the teddy bear’s neck that hold it together. Not the neatest thread work, but it looks strong enough despite the head which is slightly lopsided. Coal black eyes shining bright as ever, and the same blue bow tie except now it has a few more loose threads than before.

“Steve Junior…” You breathe, running your fingers over the stuffie, and his fur feels just as soft as before. He looks so old, so worn out, pieced together and stitched so precariously but it’s him. As ridiculous as it sounds – he’s just a stuffed animal after all – but it’s him and now suddenly your mouth feels dry. You bring the stuffie up to your nose and you’re bathing in Steve’s alpha scent, so potent and rich and warm.

“It took me a while to find someone who’d fix him up.” Steve breaks the silence, scratching the back of his neck. You sneak a peek up at his face to find him scanning yours, as if gauging your reaction. “A lot of his cotton stuffing was dirty so I had to replace it. But the rest of him is all him, just as he was before. I thought of just buying you a new one, but I figured you’d appreciate this more.”

You nod slowly, stroking the top of Steve Junior’s head as if you can’t get enough of it. “You gathered up all the pieces from the kitchen floor?”

“Yes.”

It’s a monosyllabic answer, but his eyes say a lot more. At least, you think they do and you wish he’d verbalise it. Instead, with a hesitancy that was never there before, Steve slowly pulls you into his lap, holding you close against his chest, where you can feel the dull thud of his heartbeat. And you let yourself be held, feeling his alpha warmth that you haven’t felt in a while now.

Warm hands cup your face and make you look up at him. And it’s his tenderness that you can’t wrap your head around. Is this the same Steve who so vehemently accused you of cheating on him just days ago? Why was it always a different emotion with Steve? Always a different mask, as if he could switch them out so easily. What were you supposed to believe?

He kisses you like someone who’s parched, and again you feel that desperation on his lips. Before, his kisses were always so confident, self-assured, taking what he needed from you and leaving you breathless and reeling in the process. Now, he’s gentle. Handling you as if you’re made of glass. And it feels so foreign to you.

You let yourself kiss him back. Steve sighs and increases his pace, tongue swiping over your bottom lip, making you gasp before he gains entrance. His hands fall down to your hips at the same moment your arms wind around his neck. It’s frenzied movement and a blur of limbs, like two people who’ve suddenly realised they can’t get enough of each other after days of no contact.

“Fuck,” Steve mutters under his breath, squeezing your hips before his hand slips down between your legs, cupping your mound in his warm grip. You pant, jerking forward, squashing Steve Junior between both your bodies. You pull away long enough to prop your stuffie up on your pillow, making sure he’s sitting upright before Steve drags you back to him.

“You need me, don’t you?” He whispers fervently against your lips, biting and nipping while the heel of his palm grinds against your clothed pussy. “Tell me you need me.”

You do need him; you’ll always need him. It’s what terrifies you the most. But you try not to think, try to lose yourself in the feeling of his lips smattering kisses all over your jaw and moving down to your neck. He slips his hand into your panties, eliciting another gasp from you, and a jerk from your hips that can’t help but want him.

You start moving against his hand, riding it while he slips a finger inside you. Your slippery pussy swallowing his digit as if you’re starved, walls so needy that they constrict around him and you moan, grabbing at his shoulders, wanting to feel more of him. Nothing’s solved, nothing’s okay – but he’s made you so addicted to his touch that, for a second, it doesn’t even seem to matter.

His hands have snaked up your shirt, palm pressing against your belly like how he always used to do before. Except now it’s different, now it makes your eyes widen and a cold panic rise in the pit of your stomach. Again, the picture plays behind your eyes: you, alone with your baby. Dark and dreary, and Steve’s nowhere to be found. He’s gone. He’s left you. Did he kiss that other omega like this?

“STOP!”

You push hard against his chest, the force of the blow surprising both of you. You scramble off him, hands shaking and you can still feel his burning kiss on your lips, and his touch on your body too. You back away slowly, shaking your head and breathing hard.

“I can’t, I–” Your eyes dart to Steve’s face, and he’s looking up at you with what looks to be concern, as if he’s just kicked an already injured puppy. Repeatedly, you shake your head, “I’m sorry, I just… I just can’t!”

Running to the bathroom, you slam the door shut and that’s when the tears spurt out and you’re sobbing and sobbing. It seems like you’re always crying – as if the self-pity will just never end – but it’s like you can’t stop. Why couldn’t you just become okay again?

Everything is okay! The omega inside you screeches. He fixed Steve Junior! It shows he cares! Everything’s okay now!

If everything was okay, then why did nothing feel fine at all?

Staring at your reflection in the mirror, you see an omega who is weak and broken. Red eyes, bitten nails, puffy face. Hair unkempt, hands shaking pathetically, clothes crumpled. Was this the omega who was meant to keep Steve happy? Was this the omega who was going to have his baby? You cradle your stomach as rivulets of tears flow down your face.

“What are we gonna do?” You whisper softly, your sobs making your words almost indecipherable. “I don’t know what to do, I don’t know what to do, I don’t know what to do.”

You don’t hear the thud of the footsteps, only the crash of the bathroom door as it’s thrown open, Steve striding towards you and grabbing your shoulders before you have a chance to even cower.

“What’s wrong with you?” He roars, but there’s desperation in his anger as he shakes you by the shoulders.

“I don’t know!”

“What’s it going to take to get you to go back to how you were before?”

“I DON’T KNOW!”

You flinch when he draws his hand back, wondering if this is it. If he’s finally run out of whatever patience he had up until this point and now you’re in for it. You brace yourself for the inevitable blow, taking a deep breath and willing yourself to disassociate from the pain. But you only see Steve looking at you incredulously, his hand slowly curling into a fist by his side.

“I wouldn’t hit you.”

He looks almost appalled, staring down at his own fist for a handful of tense seconds, during which you can hear the sounds of your own rapid breathing and every single beat of your heart too.

“It wouldn’t matter if you did.” You say it softly, more to yourself than to him.

As if exhausted of all his options, Steve’s grip on you loosens. Blue eyes boring into yours, reflecting the helplessness that you can also detect in your bond.

“I told you to forget about it.” His hands cup your face again, thumbs swiping away your tears. “Why can’t you just forget about that night, why can’t you just let me make you happy?”

More than anything, you wish you had an answer for him.

***  

Despite talking lesser and lesser and slowly becoming strangers by day, the magnetic pull between the two of you increases at night. Where it’s dark and warm and you can pretend it’s all okay, that’s when Steve holds you and you let yourself be held by him every single night.

Which is why you wake up with a start, on the bed completely empty besides you and the newly resurrected Steve Junior.  A glance at your phone tells you it’s past midnight – so, where’s Steve? Blindly, you reach out for him – but he’s not there and, despite everything, this troubles you.

He’s left you, the dark voice at the back of your head cackles. You thought you could get away with being upset with him for this long, and now he’s left you, just like he said he would if you got out of line.

You’re not even fully awake before you’re on your feet, trying to keep your dizziness at bay. It’s another symptom of your pregnancy, another reminder of the secret you’re holding inside of you, another reminder that you need to tell someone. But right now, all you can focus on is where is Steve?

You find him on the small balcony that overlooks the back of the house. Elbows resting on the railing and blonde hair looking silver in the moonlight. He looks back as if he senses you, cigarette between his lips and a cloud of smoke surrounding him before he turns his back to you once more.

Before you can change your mind and go back to bed, you venture forward to stand beside the alpha, heart thudding as it always does whenever you’re near him. After days of his hot and cold behaviour and your own depleting moods, you realise you don’t know how to act around him or what to say. A gust of cold wind blows and you shiver, but it gives you this sudden burst of courage to speak.

“You shouldn’t smoke so much.” You blurt out. It’s the only thing you can think of to say; you’ve seen Steve smoke here and there a few times, at parties or gatherings with his friends. But never at home, in the middle of the night, with two empty beer cans rolling around by his feet.

To your surprise, Steve puts the cigarette out. Dropping it to the floor and stomping on it before turning away from you to exhale the final puff of smoke. You watch as it swirls into the night air, dissipating almost immediately.

“Sharon used to say that a lot.” He remarks, and hearing his ex’s name on his tongue feels like a punch to your gut – he’s never voluntarily mentioned her before. You turn around to leave, but his next words stop you short. “It’s funny, because I never gave a fuck about what she said. Or any of the other girls I was with.” He looks at you squarely, “I cheated on all of them too. And I never thought anything of it.”

It feels like there’s needles in your throat when you swallow, tumbling all the way down to your stomach and tearing you up from the inside out. Why is he telling you this?

“I thought it would be the same with you. You’re just an omega after all, why should I care about what you say or how you feel?” The full moon’s reflecting in his eyes, giving them an alien silver glow that makes him look like a stranger. And maybe he is a stranger, because he’s never opened up like this with you before.

“But I do.” He says it so quietly, it almost gets lost in the night air. Another gust of chilly wind has your teeth chattering, goosebumps covering your bare arms as you stand there and stare at him in only your nightgown. You don’t protest when Steve shrugs off his jacket and drapes it over your shoulders, smoothening the lapels and his fingers linger at your collarbone. For a split second, he leans closer, closing his eyes and inhaling deeply before sighing.

“I’ve hurt girls in the past and I’ve never cared. But you…” He turns back, looking over the balcony railing, and you wait a few beats, your mind silently urging him to finish his thought.

“I thought I could cheat on you and things would be fine after that. That I’d scare you into acting right and we’d just go back to how things were.” The words tumble out of his mouth quickly, as if he’s spitting them out before his ego catches up and swallows them back into his brain.

“Sharon warned me about you.” You blurt out.

His head whips around, faster than the frenzied winds that surround the two of you, “You spoke to her?”

“I–I didn’t believe her. I didn’t want to believe her because I liked you so much.”

“I know you did.” Steve cocks his head to the side, looking at you almost curiously. The stars dance in his eyes, and tufts of his blonde hair blow up with the strong wind, “How could you like me that much, despite everything?”

You don’t know what to say. How could you like him that much? Despite everything he’d done to you? Was it because the forced mating compelled you to feel things for him? No – your feelings were more complex than that. They’ve been there since the beginning, when he would bully you and you wished to God that he would like you. To after he mated you, and how you’d persuaded yourself that he’d changed, that he did like you now. To when he confessed to cheating, and your whole world broke down…

It's less of a realization and more of a fact: you like Steve a lot – more than Peter and more than your mother. Because you could live without Peter and you could even live without your mother. But you don’t think you could ever live without Steve.

When you don’t answer, Steve sucks in his breath and looks away again, “You’re pure, you know? The way you act, how good you are. And it… confuses me.”

You have to grip the railing hard to keep yourself rooted in reality – was Steve genuinely confiding in you?

“I’ve never second-guessed myself before.” He says after a long, long pause. As if he’s got a script pictured in his mind and he keeps mentally rewriting it and scratching things out. “But you… You make me second-guess everything.” It sounds like an accusation, but a resigned one; and you focus on his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows. “I shouldn’t have made you think I was going to leave you. Because I won’t. Ever. I can promise you that right now.”

You nod, tentatively taking a step towards him and he mirrors your actions, his hand reaching up to stroke your cheek. It’s instinctive when you lean into his touch, feel the rough pads of his fingers rub against the soft skin of your face. He traces your cheekbones, and he’s so gentle. You wish you could freeze this moment, because Steve’s emotions are like the changing tide. Would he be this tender tomorrow or the day after – or even two minutes from now?

“You should go back to bed.” He says abruptly, as if on cue.

Why is your heart sinking? Why do you want to stay? But you listen to him anyway, a large part of you will always listen to him, always want to be good for him. And it’s when you’re a good few steps away that you hear him clear his throat.

“Omega?”

“Yes, Steve?”

“I’m sorry. For all of it.”

A coolness spreads across your chest, like a pleasant, soothing balm that calms you from the inside out. Your heart steadies, and you feel like you can breathe again.

***

“He’s not in his room, Steve.”

“I don’t fucking care.”

“He’s our running back, we need him. Especially today.”

“Jensen can play his position. Now let’s just fucking go.”

Behind the closed door of your bedroom, you can hear Steve and Sam’s muffled voices out in the hallway. You don’t mean to eavesdrop, but the two of them seem to be growing collectively louder and louder.

The tension seems to be running high between the two of them – you’ve hardly seen them speak since the day Sam apologised to you and Steve exploded on him. But the two alphas seem even more stressed out today, with the final football match of the season against a rival college in less than a few hours.

“Jensen can’t play as good as Bucky.” Sam quips.

“Bucky’s not here.” Steve says through clenched teeth, “He’s probably out somewhere, either passed out or hungover. And we don’t have time to start a manhunt for him so let’s just go.”

The bedroom door bursts open and you freeze as Steve storms in past you. The two of you haven’t spoken since last night when he’d apologised on the balcony. Granted, he’d been busy all day prepping for the game tonight – last minute workouts and strategizing with his team. And you had about three loads of laundry to get through since you’d been neglecting things like that for the past few weeks now.

And yet the lack of contact between the two of you made you wonder whether he was already regretting his apology. Or worse – what if he was going to pretend that he never apologised at all?

If anything, Steve seems more riled up and on edge now than ever, rummaging through the already messy bedroom (you had neglected cleaning too, and it’s not like Steve himself ever cleaned). “Where the fuck is it??” He murmurs under his breath, tossing clothes out of the closet and onto the floor.

“Wh-What are you looking for?” You ask him quietly, wondering whether he can detect the awkwardness in your tone. Sure, he’d apologised – but where do the two of you stand now? In some awkward limbo between “okay” and “not okay”?

Steve sighs, stepping away from the closet and grabbing his gym bag. Slinging it over his shoulder, he makes his way over to you.

“Nothing.” He murmurs, reaching out to tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear. You gulp, wanting to say something, anything. Maybe wish him luck for the game? But you’re too shy, lips feeling like they’re glued together and heart beating harder than ever. Steve opens his mouth to say something else, and then–

“STEVE, LET’S GO!” Sam bellows from downstairs.

Steve leaves without another word.

You spend the day doing all the chores you’d neglected for the past few weeks. It’s crazy to you how much of a difference two words can bring about. You’d spent the past few weeks lying listlessly in bed, feeling numbingly indifferent half the time and cripplingly stressed out for the other half. And you’re still stressed – how can you not be? Pregnant within your first year of college and you still haven’t told a soul.

But it’s somewhat easier now to make a mental list of everything – washing and drying three hampers of clothes (you wonder if you can put Steve Junior in the washing machine but after seeing the precarious stitches on his neck, you conclude that handwashing him would be safer). You also venture downstairs to clean the kitchen (and it’ll never cease to shock you, what a mess three alphas can make).

It's only when you’re deep into cleaning the bedroom that the vacuum cleaner catches on something poking out from under Steve’s side of the bed. A rectangular book with a black velvet cover – it seems unassuming enough yet it piques your curiosity anyways. Maybe because it’s got Steve’s scent all over it.

You expect blank pages – Steve’s not the type to make notes – but nothing could truly prepare you for what you actually see when you open the book.

It’s you.

Over and over again. Drawn on one page, then again on the next. You flip five pages down, and there you are again. Different renditions of you on almost every single page and the book is more than half filled up. You in pencil sketches, you in watercolour; there’s one of you with a pen in hand, clearly taking notes. Another of you sitting under a tree, drinking from a juice-box, one of you on your phone, and plenty more of you studying – always wearing your oversized hoodie.

The most recent one is of you sleeping, wearing his jersey with the holes in it and Steve Junior clutched tightly in your arms. It’s with shaky breath that you trace a trembling finger over the masterful strokes, admiring the accuracy of the teddy bear’s blue bow tie – all the way down to the loose threads! And the attention to detail is astounding – your hair, your skin, the slight furrow between your brows…

It's a lot to take in. Had Steve drawn these? He must have! You didn’t even know Steve could draw like this because never once had he done it in front of you. And how long had he had this book for? There were so many drawings – was it from before you and him got together? Carefully, you close the sketchbook and place it neatly back under the bed.

Almost as if you’re in a trance, you walk around to your own side of the bed to where your little makeshift nest is. What’s left of it anyways, since you haven’t really kept up with the upkeep and right now all it consists of is your teddy bear and Steve’s jersey with the holes in it.

His lucky jersey. Was that what he’d been looking for earlier?

Steve Junior looks at you with his coal black eyes as if conveying to you exactly what you’re thinking. Thoughts racing, you stroke his fur softly, the action reminding you of the rare occasions when Steve would fall asleep before you with his face buried in the crook of your neck. When you’d card your fingers through his hair because you were too shy to do it when he was awake.

You feel the sudden urge to do it now as you hold onto his lucky jersey. The one he was looking for. The one he probably needs right now. Right?

Grabbing your phone to check the time, you find that it’s already early evening – the game would be almost over by now. Could you possibly make it in time? Would this even be worth it?

You seem to have made up your mind before you can even begin to answer any of those questions.

***

“Let her in, that’s the quarterback’s girlfriend.”

Getting into the college stadium is easier than you thought it would be. In fact, it’s surprisingly easy, as if the universe is paving a path for you straight to Steve. You thought your significance at university was that of an ant surrounded by giants – but the guys hanging by the ticket booth recognise you immediately, one of them even offering to personally take you inside.

“You should go to the box by the front, that’s where all the girlfriends hang out.”

Never in your life have you been to a college football game before – or a football game of any variety for that matter. Feeling completely out of your depth, you put all your faith into this guy you’ve just met as he guides you through the waves and waves of people. You try your hardest to swallow down your anxiety – you hate large crowds – your nails digging into your palms while your heart races, already wondering whether coming here was a mistake.

“I’m Colin, by the way.” The guy says before pausing to look up at the gigantic scoreboard, “Uh-oh. We’re still down by a few points. That’s why I was outside, couldn’t handle the pressure – even as just a spectator.”

Down by a few points? You clutch Steve’s lucky jersey harder between your fingers, wondering what exactly you thought you’d accomplish by coming here. The game was in full swing – it’s not like you could toss the jersey into the field and hope Steve would notice and pick it up.

“I just think today’s a bad day for the team,” Colin explains, “Steve seems distracted – well, that’s what my friend Jake told me. Jake’s on the team too, but he’s usually on reserve. Except he’s playing today because Bucky didn’t show up, and if you ask me–”

Colin’s voice drowns out as your nerves go into overdrive. Slowly, after ages of weaving through a very intense and rowdy crowd, the two of you make it to a cluster of seats in the front row. A bunch of cheerleaders are standing there in a group, biting their nails with frowns and looks of concern etched on their faces – the girlfriends.

You gulp, glancing down at your own attire and knowing you’ll stick out like a sour thumb. All your new clothes that Steve had bought you were currently in the washing machine – leaving you with the one piece of clothing that you hadn’t worn in a long time. Your oversized hoodie.

Not that it matters right now.

“Well, there you go. Front row seats to all the action – although it’s looking pretty bleak right now, so I’d look away if I was you.” Colin grimaces, glancing at the scoreboard once more. “We’re down by five points and there isn’t much time left on the clock.”

You manage a tight smile, feeling like a tiny fish inside the Pacific Ocean. “Thank you for helping me, Colin.” You say softly.

“No worries.” Colin’s already walking away – clearly, he has no faith left in this game, “Oh, and please don’t tell Steve I spoke to you, okay? He’s probably going to be in a bad mood when – if – we lose this game, and he usually takes his anger out on Jake or me, and this’ll just make it worse, and–”

And then he’s gone, and you make your way past the cluster of cheerleaders, whispering out a soft “excuse me” every time you make eye contact with one of them. They all look you up and down, but thankfully don’t say anything as you walk over to the front, where you now have a clear view of the field.

Steve’s got his team in a huddle, yelling out instructions that you can’t hear. He’s in his blue jersey with his helmet under his arm, blonde hair fluffy and messy and his face pale yet flushed at the same time. And he does look stressed and distracted just how Colin had said. Would he be angry if his team lost? Would he be mad at you for coming? With Steve, one never really knew what to expect, and you suddenly feel extremely foolish, standing here in your ill-fitted hoodie with a jersey full of holes in your hands.

All the players take their positions for the final few minutes of the game. From your limited understanding of football, you can tell that the stakes are very high. The girl next to you can’t stop biting her nails and clutching onto her friend’s arm.

Your eyes are trained on Steve, focused only on him despite the fact that there’s ten other players wearing the same blue jersey and helmet as him. That’s when you feel the mark on your neck suddenly prickle, and Steve’s heard jerks up at that exact moment as if on cue, turning back to look directly at you.

His face is obscured by his helmet, but it makes your breath catch in your throat all the same. Like it did every time he’d strut into the lecture hall, every time you’d see him in the hallways, and those times when he’d show up to your dorm room. He’s yards away from you, but you shoot him a small smile – it’s the first time you’ve smiled at him in a long time now and you wonder if he can even see it.

The whistle blows and there’s a flurry of movement. For a handful of seconds which feel like ages, you don’t even know where the ball is. Everything’s moving so fast, and a glance up at the gigantic timer shows you there’s barely any time left. But the seconds feel like hours, the anticipation growing high not only within you but in the crowd around you. You lean forward over the rails, eyes scanning the field and you see a blur of blue with a handful of players chasing behind it.

You don’t think you’ve ever seen Steve run so fast, yard after yard, as if he’s racing against the clock – which he is. And then his teammate – all the way from the other end – heaves the ball downfield. You see it soaring in the air, so quick that it’s easy to miss. And there’s mere seconds left on the clock, and there’s about four defenders surrounding Steve but he’s gotten past the goal line, and he jumps up, and –

There’s a split second of silence before the stadium erupts in cheers. You realise you’d been holding your breath, and you blink several times before you see the ball in Steve’s hands, hoisted up high. And he’s cleared the goal line, and his teammates are charging at him, whooping in the air.

“I can’t believe it!” The cheerleader next to you screeches in glee, grabbing her friend as they both jump up and down, “A touchdown! We won!”

And sure enough, the huge screen at the front flashes “touchdown!” in huge block letters, and everyone seems to be beside themselves. You exhale in relief, the cheerleaders’ infectious excitement rubbing off on you as you can’t help but smile. Steve is swarmed by his team, and they lift him up. And now you can see him more clearly, see when his eyes zero in on you.

On the shoulders of his teammates, but he’s looking directly at you. You want to give him a little wave but you feel too shy, and you wonder whether you should leave now since he’d obviously want to celebrate with his team. But, as if he somehow senses your intentions, it takes Steve about a millisecond to get back down on the ground, and then he breaks into a run – straight towards you!

You grip onto the railing in anticipation, and Steve crosses the distance in almost record time. There are people in the crowd who’ve invaded the pitch, congratulating his teammates and staring after him as he makes a beeline towards you. Wide-eyed, you stare as he gets closer and closer, his cheeks flushed pink and chest puffed out as he comes to a stop in front of you.

“You’re here.” He says, slightly out of breath.

“Y-Yeah, you’re uh–” You’re suddenly at a loss for words, but you hold up his lucky jersey as if that’s a sufficient enough explanation. Clearing your throat, you add: “Congratulations, Steve. You played really well.”

He stares at you for a moment, and then before you know what’s happening, his hands wrap around your hips, lifting you up over the barrier and into his arms. You squeak, arms instinctively winding around his neck and your legs wrap around his waist.

He kisses you, and there’s an explosion of summer sunshine behind your eyes and all around you. The scent of firewood and an intense summer day interweaves through all your senses – all you can taste, smell, breathe is him. And it’s you who pulls him closer, returning his kiss with double the enthusiasm, your lips working against his as if you’re willingly ready to be consumed in him.

Steve draws back, only to kiss you again. One peck, another peck, and then one of his hands slips up and cups your cheek, pulling your face even closer as his tongue probes against yours and he sucks sweetly on your bottom lip, leaving you breathless yet wanting even more when he suddenly pulls away.

“I love you.”

The words seem to burst out of him – and it seems like both of you stop breathing as soon as he says it. As if you’re both encased in this bubble and the people around you don’t matter and those three words are bouncing around the confines of this bubble, echoing and growing louder, embracing you like a hug.

And your whole world stops. There are hundreds of people around you but they all seem to freeze in place, and you can hear your heart thumping to the same beat as his. And his eyes are clear blue and earnest, and you can see your reflection in them. Shocked, surprised, caught off guard yet every cell in your body rapidly filling up with hope.

“Don’t say that…” You breathe, “D-Don’t say things you don’t mean.” Or else I’ll believe you.

“I mean it.” Steve presses his forehead against yours, gripping you so tightly that you feel like you can’t breathe – but in a good way. “I mean it, omega. I’m in love with you.”

He savours each word as he says it, and you feel this hot and cold feeling – rushes of it – throughout your body. Sparks in the pit of your tummy like tiny butterflies fluttering excitably, or firecrackers ready to erupt in a shower of what feels like pure happiness. You feel light, like you could float forever as his words keep repeating inside your head like a song.

Up until this moment, you’ve second-guessed almost every single word he’s said to you. But why aren’t you second-guessing this? Why is your whole body trusting and believing him, erupting in elation as he holds you close? He loves you. Steve loves you! Love! You don’t think anyone’s ever told you they’ve loved you before. Or made you feel this strange feeling; this heady mixture of wanting to laugh and wanting to cry, of feeling so overwhelmed and yet so at home, and, and and–

“Steve, I’m pregnant.”

The words leave your mouth before you can stop them. And maybe you don’t want to stop them anymore, because the relief you feel is almost instantaneous.

And Steve stares at you for the longest time, and you focus on the rise and fall of his chest as he breathes rapidly, pink lips parted slightly as if he can’t believe what he’s hearing. For one horrific second, you think he’s going to drop you and leave, and take his “I love you” back and tell you it’s over. But he holds you even tighter, and you realise you’re moving as he walks the two of you to a door off to the side, leading to the changing rooms.

Once inside, he sets you down gently on your feet and pins you against the wall, trapping you against his considerably larger frame, looking down at you with an almost foreign look on his face, as if he can’t quite grasp what you’re saying.

“You’re pregnant?” He repeats.

“Yes, I am.”

“Pregnant.” Steve says it again, more to himself than to you, cupping your face, his thumbs stroking your cheekbones lightly. “My omega. Pregnant.”

“Yes.” The more you confirm it and the more he says it, the realer it seems. But it’s crazy how much less scary the prospect of pregnancy sounds when the word is coming out of his mouth. “I took three tests; they all came out positive. My period never came–”

His lips press against yours in a heady kiss that leaves you reeling, and he’s holding you so tightly that you feel light-headed. “My girl carrying my baby, just like I said you would.” Steve whispers against your lips. A smile breaks out across his face, “Baby, you’ve made me so proud.”

Proud. He’s proud. Proud of you.  

He gets down on his knees in front of you, your breath catching in your throat because he’s so big. Even on his knees, his face is level with your chest. His hands, so big and warm, trail softly down your figure – the gentlest he’s ever been. Fingers splayed out and stroking carefully over your stomach, he lifts your hoodie up and presses his face against your soft, exposed skin.

“You’re so tiny,” he breathes, almost in wonder. “So little… How’re you gonna carry my baby inside you when you’re so little?”

Your chest rises as you inhale deeply, a soft whisper of “I don’t know…” leaving your mouth.

Butterfly-light kisses trail up and down your stomach, his lips dragging against your skin, tongue peeking out to lick, nip and suck at your belly – as if he wants to devour you. You get the strong urge to card your fingers through his hair, but you’re so shy that you hesitate, jerking forward instead when the tip of his tongue probes inside your belly button.

Steve looks up, the wonder in his eyes now replaced with a familiar, devilish sparkle.

“I always knew I’d knock you up before the year was over.” He boasts cockily, one hand still firmly stroking your stomach like he’s grown addicted to the feeling. “Didn’t I say it from day one? That I was gonna fuck my baby into you? And now look at you, knocked up like the good, dutiful omega I knew you’d be under my wing.”

He sounds how he did before, the same cocky Steve. But there’s an underlying lightness to his words, this infectious excitement that’s so different from your own cold fear of being pregnant.

“You don’t think it’s too soon, Steve? I mean, I don’t think I’m ready–”

“You’re ready.” He interrupts you, words spoken between kisses against your stomach – it seems like he can’t refrain from kissing you there – “It’s an omega’s duty to have her alpha’s babies, and didn’t I say I’ve got a plan? You, me, and my baby – it’s all coming together now.”

“B-But what about college? You’re graduating now but I’ve still got two more years left, and–”

“You don’t have to worry about any of that anymore.” Steve cuts you off again, standing up to his full height so you have to crane your neck to look up at him. With his shoulder pads on, he looks even bigger than usual, “Didn’t I say I’d take care of you?”

Your concerns are swallowed up by his kiss, and his hand slips down to hook under your thighs. He picks you up easily, and he’s so strong; he only needs one arm to carry you, his other hand cupping your face and pulling you in for another kiss – as if he can’t seem to get enough.

“Poor little baby omega,” He coos, laying you down on a nearby bench and climbing on top of you. You can hear the roar of the crowd close by, everyone celebrating this monumental win for the football team. You know for a fact there are people milling about near you. Steve is undeterred, however, kissing down your neck as he pushes your hoodie up to expose your chest.

“You must’ve been so stressed, huh baby?” More kisses as he unclasps your bra and pulls it off hastily, throwing it somewhere behind him as his eyes zero in on your bare breasts.

“Y-Yeah, I was.” You can’t help but sniffle, sounding small and pathetic but you can’t help it. Telling Steve about the baby feels like a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulders, the agonising stress inside your head easing bit by bit as Steve’s large hands squeeze and grope your tits roughly.

“Don’t worry, sweet girl. You don’t have to worry about anything anymore. I know your little brain is tired from thinking so much, now you just leave all the thinking to daddy, okay? All you have to focus on is being a mommy.” He buries his face in your breasts, nuzzling and inhaling your soft skin, squeezing and pushing your tits together till they hurt while you whimper beneath him.

“St-Steve, someone might – ah! – someone might see us!”

“Shhh, didn’t I just tell you not to worry about anything?” He takes your hoodie off completely, and now you’re topless and completely at your alpha’s mercy. He grins wolfishly down at you, “Now, did you know that pregnant baby omegas like yourself are meant to feed their alphas too?”

Your eyes pop open, “Wh-What?”

Steve smirks, palming your tits roughly before rubbing one of your stiff nipples between his thumb and forefinger. You’re half enamoured by the thrill of it, and half paranoid that someone’s going to walk in and see all this, but Steve doesn’t seem to care.

“You didn’t know that you’re meant to feed daddy too? God, you really are a baby, aren’t you?” He pinches your nipple before his tongue peaks out and licks around it, making it even more erect. “All pregnant omegas have to let their alphas have a taste of their milk.”

“I haven’t – ah! – I haven’t read about that anywhere!” You try not to moan.

“That’s because you’re just a baby,” Steve coos before encasing your nipple in his mouth and giving suckling on it not so gently. And the action sends thrills straight down to your core, making you gasp breathlessly and clutch onto his broad shoulders. He releases your nipple with a pop, “Now omega, are you gonna let daddy drink your little mommy milk?”

You squirm, “Y-Yes?”

He twists your nipple roughly, “Say it, then.”

“Y-Yes, you can drink it.”

Another pinch. “Say it properly.”

“Yes, you can drink my mommy milk!” You cry out.

Steve smiles, pulling your cheek condescendingly, “Good girl. Not that I would need your permission, since you’re mine after all.” He gives your nipple a feather-light kiss before encasing it between his lips again, teeth grazing against the sensitive bud.

“And address me properly, or I’ll call the whole football team and make them watch while I fuck you.” You can feel him harden at the thought, “I’ll show them exactly how I knocked you up in the first place.”

“Daddy…” you whine, “N-Not in front of anyone, please!”

Steve licks his lips as his eyes drink you in, like a carnal wolf admiring his prey. His gaze focuses on between your legs, his hangs grabbing at your thighs and spreading them apart. Lewdly, he cups your mound and you automatically buck your hips upwards, making him smirk at your neediness. Grinding the heel of his palm against your clothed pussy, you want to hide your face in embarrassment when you see the wet patch forming on your leggings.

“You’re going to be so much hornier now that you’re pregnant,” He breathes, looking at the wet spot between your legs as if he’s entranced. Suddenly, he strikes you; palm slapping against your clothed pussy while his other hand holds your legs apart. You gasp, sparks of pleasure flaring up inside you as he repeatedly slaps your clothed cunt.

“Tell me, baby omega. Who knocked you up?”

“Y-You did!” You cry out desperately, trying to clamber upwards to grab at his shoulders except he easily pins you back down. His head dips down too, straight between your legs till he’s face to face with your pussy. And you wish to God your leggings and panties weren’t in the way, but Steve doesn’t seem to care. His tongue peaks out past his pink lips, licking a stripe up your covered cunt, and you convulse, “Oh fuck!”

“Tell me how you got knocked up, baby.” Steve speaks against your pussy, and you can feel his hot breath through the thin material of your leggings. He lets out a hum before he takes the material between his lips, sucking at the wet spot and making you throb down there, “Tell me how I filled up your little baby cunt and fucked my baby into you.”

You hesitate, and earn a harsh slap to your ass that has you hissing in pain. “Say it!”

“Y-You filled up my baby cunt and knocked me up!” You cry out desperately, rubbing your pussy against his face as he continues to suck your leggings, his nose grazing against your covered folds and making you want him so badly, it hurts. “Daddy – ah! – y-you fucked your baby into me, okay? P-Please!”

It’s insane how quickly he renders you to be delirious, but after weeks of not being intimate with him, it’s like this is exactly what you need. The depravity, the filth, the fear that just about anyone could walk in at any moment. And it’s also the pride you see in his face – alpha is proud of you for getting pregnant, and that just makes you want him even more.

“You’re just a tiny little baby,” Steve sits back up, looking down at you as if you’re some ravishing creature and not just a desperate omega practically humping against him, face contorted in need for her alpha. “How’re you growing my baby inside of you, when you’re a little fucking baby yourself, huh? Daddy’s little baby.”

He peels your leggings off, leaving you in just your panties in the changing rooms where anyone could walk in at any moment. Pressing kisses against your inner thighs, getting closer and closer to your core, and you’re wiggling underneath him, thrusting up into air because you’re so needy for him.

“I’m gonna take such good care of you, baby.” He breathes, sinking down to his knees on the side of the bench and grabbing your calves to pull you to the edge of it. His face between your thighs now, you can feel his hot breath against your panty-covered core. “Gonna keep you so happy. My little wife… I’ll give you everything you deserve.”

Your heart lurches at the word “wife.” He’s never referred to you as that before, but you don’t have the time to mull upon it when Steve’s teeth enclose around your wet panties, pulling them and letting the elastic stretch before he lets go and it snaps back against your pussy, making you whimper softly. He grins, taking the sodden fabric into his mouth again, this time sucking all your slick from the material while your eyes pop at the sight, pussy clenching around air.

“I love you, baby. You’ve made me so happy today. I want to make you happy too.” His voice is dripping with sweetness – and usually you’d be questioning: is he being sincere? Does he mean it? Should I trust him? But just hearing him say it, hearing him say “I love you,” it’s like it makes you stop thinking straight, makes you not want to question him, makes you want to believe him because what do you truly have left if you don’t believe him?

And maybe – just maybe – he does mean it.

“The mother of my child,” Steve coos, blowing cool air on your hot core, and your slick is dripping down to pool underneath you on the bench as he continues to finger the material of your panties, “Aren’t you happy that you’re pregnant, baby? Aren’t you happy that you made daddy so proud?”

You bite your lip, “H-Honestly, I’m scared– ah! – I’m too young, we’re both too young. There’re so many things we have to think about and consider, and– oh! Oh my God!”

Steve chooses that moment to rip your panties in half and dip his head down, pushing back the hood of your clit and encasing the throbbing button between his lips. He sucks down hard, and you automatically raise your hips to grind up against his face, leaving it glistening with streaks of your wetness. His hand lands an open-palmed slap against your bare pussy, the sound so lewd and wet as it echoes across the changing room.

“I asked you if you’re happy for making me proud.”

You gulp, hands reaching down to grab at his blonde tufts – something you’d been itching to do all day. Slowly, you nod your head. “Y-Yeah.” You whisper, “A-Always wanna make you proud.”

“Good girl. That’s what I thought.” He goes back to your clit, spitting down on it. His saliva pools around your button and he uses his thumb to spread it, circling and rubbing it around and around till you can’t take the intensity, and hump up against his hand. “I already told you not to think about anything else, except being a mommy and making me proud.”

Steve lifts your thighs up and props them over his shoulders, and your ankles automatically lock around him, encasing his head between your legs so he’s face to face with your core. And that’s when you feel his tongue, hard and pointed, flick against your clit, once, twice, three times till you’re crying out his name, your thighs already thrashing except his tight grip keeps them pinned to his shoulders.

“Look at your little button, all swollen up and cute.” Steve spits once more, his saliva trailing down your mound to pool around your clit once more. “You missed having your daddy make you feel good, didn’t you?”

“I…I, uh – Ow!” You gasp when he slaps your ass, the sound resonating across the room and you wonder why no one has walked in yet.

“I wasn’t asking you; I was asking her.” Steve licks his lips, looking straight at your glistening folds and using his pointed finger to swipe up and down your wetness. “Look at your little baby pussy, she’s crying because she’s so happy that daddy’s here to take care of her again.” And that’s all it takes for him to bury his face in your wetness once more, enveloping your sensitive folds between his lips and suctioning harshly.

“Mm, fuck, daddy!” You whimper softly, and he reaches up to squeeze your breast possessively.

Licking and sucking his way back up to your clit, his teeth graze against your swollen bundle of nerves, making you throb like crazy as the sparks begin to build up. “So fuckin’ puffy, just for daddy, huh?” He questions, and you gasp out in agreement, your movements getting needier and more desperate as you begin to hump into his face in earnest, your fists tightening around his hair as you practically smear your pussy over his face, feeling his tongue, his teeth, his lips, his nose, even the light stubble he’s starting to grow out – all of it creating delicious friction against you.

Your body is rocked by so many different sensations: he’s practically making out with your pussy as his mouth suctions over it, lapping at your wetness like he’s starved. His tongue, so hard and pointed, fucks into your hole, his nose grazing against your clit before he licks a flat stripe up from your fuckhole up your slit, ending with a hearty suck up on your clit before biting down on the bundle of nerves not so lightly.

“That’s right, baby. My horny fuckin’ little omega, rub your baby cunt on daddy’s face, use me to make yourself cum. Fuck! I said rub yourself on my fucking face! Harder, before I change my mind.” Steve’s teetering between nice and mean, and the heady mix of both makes you scream out and clutch his hair harder, his voice muffled and sending vibrations against your clit. “Hump on daddy’s face, baby, c’mon. Make yourself feel good, show daddy how much you missed me.”

Your orgasm is doubly intense, and for the second time in your life, your juices squirt out, streaming all over Steve’s face and coating him in your slick. And, like a man starved, he wastes no time in swiping his cheek and sucking his finger, his eyes training on your pulsating pussy as you clench and release, over and over again, thighs tightening around his face as you cry out, “Oh! Oh my, d-daddy!”

“Good baby,” He praises you, prying your legs off his shoulders, “Doesn’t it feel so good to just switch off and let your daddy do all the thinking?”

Hands and legs limp like jelly and every thought and worry slowly leaving your mind, you manage to sniffle out a soft yet ashamedly honest, “Y-Yeah.”

You’re completely limp in his arms as he picks you up by the waist, sitting down on the bench and setting you down on his lap, your back against his chest. But not before undoing his fly and pulling his dick out. It looks angry and red and somehow bigger than ever – as if it’s about to explode. You gulp – it’s been so long since he’s been inside you. Would he still fit?

Like a steel rod, his cock pokes out from between his legs, resting pretty between your own thighs that are parted by his hands. Your wetness has spread all the way from your folds to down your legs, and it’s mildly embarrassing just how needy you are for him at this moment. So needy, in fact, that you surprise yourself – your hands grabbing at his dick as if the omega inside you just can’t help it.

“Fuck,” Steve hisses, covering your hand with his own, “Look at your tiny baby hands on my daddy dick.” His tongue is lapping and sucking at his mark on your neck – his favourite spot – but his eyes are locked on the scene in front of him – you palming his dick almost hesitantly, as if you’re scared of it yet want it badly at the same time – which you do.

You swallow harshly, “P-Please.”

“Please what, sweet girl?”

You duck your head, too shy to voice your desire but his hand grips your chin and makes you look up, twisting your head back slightly so he can look into your eyes.

“Tell me what you want, baby.” Steve says softly, beguilingly with blue eyes sparkling, “I already told you I’ll give you whatever you want – you just have to tell me.”

You surge upwards to kiss him, suddenly remembering how he’d rejected your kisses the last time the two of you had had sex. But this time, he captures your lips with his, ravenously making out with you and his tongue dominates yours, licking up every crevice of your mouth like it’s his job to kiss you. Till you can’t breathe and yet you still don’t want to pull away, and it’s him who finally does.

“Or we could just sit here, and I could feel you.” Steve muses, hand gliding his dick back and forth against the soft skin of your thighs before slapping it against your pussy. You gasp and convulse, and he only chuckles as he repeats the action, and you can’t help but close your legs around his dick, as if forcing him to put it inside you.

“Alpha please!” You mewl softly.

“I guess your pregnancy hormones have made you even needier now, huh omega?” He snickers, using his hand to guide yours up and down his dick, making you jack him off. And you can feel every ridge, every vein of his thick dick as it pulses under your hand. And the omega inside you is feral, you want him so badly it’s unreal. All these weeks of no intimacy have you starved in a different way – because being mated to him means always wanting him, always yearning for him, and having no willpower against his charms.

It's with burning cheeks and tears of need welling in your eyes that you utter: “P-Please, alpha! N-Need you inside me, your knot… So bad. So bad!”

“Why? You’re already knocked up.” He’s tracing the tip of his dick against your clit, holding you down as you thrash on his lap. And you don’t understand his willpower – did he not want you as badly as you wanted him? But he continues to slap and stroke his dick against your folds, coating his length in your cream, grabbing you by the hips and grazing you on top of it, physically grinding you against his hard dick yet not putting it inside you.

“Aww, poor baby. Look at your cute little baby cunt, all drippy and leaking all over daddy. You still want my dick, baby? Still want my knot even if you’re already pregnant?”

“Yes! Yes, please!” You want to tell him not to tease you, but you know that he’s your alpha and you can’t really tell him what to do. You know you’re already submissive by nature but in his arms right now, you feel like you’re completely at his mercy, like you’d do anything for him. “N-Need you, daddy. So bad. Just… Just gotta feel you inside… P-Please!”

Steve swears, grabbing the base of his dick and lining it up against your leaking pussy. But he has to lift you up by the hips and slam you back down to get his fat, bulbous tip to finally breach your tiny hole. And oh my God – was it possible that he felt even bigger than ever before? He’s barely halfway inside you and you feel stuffed to the brim already, slippery walls convulsing and crying around his fat cock as it penetrates into you.

“What a tight fuckin’ baby cunt,” Steve grits out, squeezing your tits till it hurts, “God, fuck! Never had a pussy this tight before, baby. It’s like you were made for me.”

He’s so big, it almost feels like it’s the first time – how could you ever have gotten used to such a huge dick? And he’s big everywhere: his muscular legs which hold your entire body weight, his thick arms that hold your thrashing limbs at bay. All six foot six inches of him dwarf you completely. You feel so light, so fragile, so tiny on top of him, his dick slowly going deeper and deeper inside of you, practically ripping you in two.

“S-So big, daddy…” You moan, because it hurts yet it hurts so good, and you love the delicious friction you feel.

“Can’t even go all the way inside you, baby.” Steve say softly, as if he himself is surprised by his own girth and by how small you are. “Fuck, you’re tinier than I remember. Guess I’m too big for you. Your cute little baby cunt can’t take me in, omega.”

“Please! F-Force it in.” Something carnal takes over you then, and you’re surprised by your own words; they sound so desperate, so lust-ridden and unabashed – like you’d die if he isn’t fully inside you.

And Steve growls, pushing out of you and picking you up – and he only needs one arm to do it – before forcibly turning you around so that you’re chest to chest with him. He forces you back down on his dick, and it’s so hard and imposing as it pierces into you, and you can’t help but clamber closer to Steve, both of you gasping against each other’s lips when he finally fills you up till the hilt, and the pain is so deliciously excruciating, you feel like you’ll break in half.

“I think I may have broke your pussy, baby.” He whispers, as you marvel at how much of a tight fit it is, his dick so snugly inside you, stretching out your walls as far as they’ll go around his fat girth. You truly do feel broken, but in the best way, and you wrap your arms around his neck, wanting to be closer.

“D-Don’t care, alpha.” You don’t know what’s suddenly come over you, maybe it’s the fact that he told you he loves you, maybe it’s because you haven’t had sex with him for weeks, maybe it’s because you’ve finally told him you’re pregnant and he’s proud of you, he’s promised to take care of you. Or maybe it’s something else altogether, but your desire for him has never been this high, this intense. Even Steve looks surprised.

Slowly, he starts bouncing you up and down on his dick. And you don’t have to do any work, just sit there and let him manoeuvre you, let him control your movements like a puppeteer, like how he controls every other aspect of your life. And maybe it’s time to admit that you like it that way, maybe it’s time to stop fighting with the omega inside you. Maybe this, here with him, is where you belong.

“You like me splitting you open like this, don’t you?” He whispers against your lips, capturing them in a searing kiss that has you grabbing his face and pulling him closer. Wanting to touch him and smell him and feel him and hold him and everything in between. His dick is hitting that special spot inside of you, making you cry out with every thrust, not caring that you’re being loud and this is a public place and anyone could walk in.

“I love you so much, baby.” And there it is again, those three words once again, penetrating into your heart and tattooing themselves upon it. His hand suddenly grabs yours, holding it close and pressing kisses all over your palm and fingers – and you’re reminded of the night where you’d begged him not to leave you, and how you’d done the same thing.

“I’m never letting you go, omega.” Steve speaks between kisses, all the while his hips are a blur as they move up and down, thrusting inside you like he wants to keep the two of you connected forever. “I’m gonna make you my housewife, keep you locked up and safe so no one can ever hurt you or my baby. I’m gonna take care of you, both of you.”

And you’re nodding feverishly, whispering “okay” over and over again, grinding down to meet his thrusts, biting your lip in bliss when his hand snakes down to where you two meet, his fingers deftly rubbing your clit, heightening your pleasure as his cock continues to tear you in half.

“My omega, all mine,” He growls, balls smacking against your skin as he fucks into you, your poor fuckhole so used and abused yet you don’t even care as you drip all over him, the pleasure growing steadily inside you, coils tightening as he fucks you like only he ever could. “Won’t let anyone else touch you, speak to you, even look at you anymore. You’re my property – my little wife knocked up with my kid. Won’t let anything come between us, not again.”

Through your delirium, you manage to lock eyes with him, clutching at him desperately, and your words come out so softly, and you feel so small when you ask him, “Y-Y-You promise?”

He stalls for a second, just a second, before his thrusts resume, hitting deeper if that’s even possible. He cups your face with his warm hand, and you can smell his heady, musky scent that you’re so addicted to. His eyes sparkle earnestly, like twin blue oceans that you could drown in except the experience would be pleasant. He leans close to you, so close; “I promise, omega.”

You cum so hard, you feel like you’re going to pass out, your walls constricting around his dick, squeezing it so hard while he continues to thrust up into you. You can feel your cream leaking down his dick, staining his uniform but it’s like you can’t stop squirting around him, your slick squeezing out of your worn-out pussy as it pulsates around his hard cock.

“Steve, oh my God, oh my God, fuck!” You cry out in complete abandon, clutching onto his biceps, your nails digging through the material of his jersey.

“That’s right baby, cum on daddy’s dick like the good little girl you are,” He coaxes you, rubbing your bare back almost soothingly, while his fat dick continues to pierce in and out of you at an inhumane pace – as if he’s savouring being inside you, as if he never wants to stop. “Squeeze my fucking dick, omega. Fuck, I’m gonna keep you pregnant forever, baby. Tell me you want that; tell me you want all my fucking babies.”

“W-Want your babies!” You cry out obediently, your body jelly on top of his, limbs twitching as the rushes of pleasure flush through your body. He’s using you like a fuckdoll now, an iron grip on your hips as he pounds into you as if he can’t get enough. His mouth latches onto your mark, licking and sucking possessively, and you think you might pass out from the pleasure – and he still wouldn’t stop.

You feel his dick twitch inside you, and he’s still fucking you through his own release, his seed so hot as it pours into you. Spurting hot cum, coating your insides like he’s trying to brand you, and he grips firmly onto your hair, pulling your face to his and kissing you roughly. “I love you, baby.” He whispers soft as a feather against your lips, and you don’t think you’ll ever get tired of hearing him say it, as you grind down, his thick ropes of cum mingling with your own slick, and he’s still pumping out more. As if his load is so heavy and he won’t stop until you’re completely filled up.

“Marry me.”

For the second time today, he renders you completely speechless. Third time, if you count your reaction to his book of sketches. Cupping both your cheeks and making you look at him and only him, and you don’t know what to think. First ‘I love you’ and now ‘marry me’? The alarm bells are chiming softly in the rational part of your mind – because isn’t all of this happening too fast, too suddenly, too soon?

“Marry me, omega.” Steve repeats, “Let me take you home. To Brooklyn. I’ll take care of you, give you a real home, I’ll make you so happy. And you can leave this place behind.”

Leave it behind? What did he mean by that? Your degree? There’re so many questions on your mind: Is he being serious? Does he mean it? Why is all of this coming out now? Should you believe him, believe his promises – when your own trust in him has come back to slap you in the face multiple times in the past? And what if this is all some cruel practical joke? What about your education, your scholarship? What about your mother? What about… what about… what about–

But it’s like your mind is working in overdrive to forcibly push all those thoughts out, and replace them with how he’d told you he loved you. How he’d apologised to you last night. All the sketches he made of you – those weren’t a joke, were they? They couldn’t be.

Time to surrender, the omega inside of you is beguiling as ever; time to be happy…

“Okay.” You whisper.

He breaks into a smile, like he knows you could never say no to him, and presses kisses all over your face.

There’s a quiet calm as he picks you up, taking you to the nearby bathroom and helping you clean up. You thought your head would be a screaming mess of emotions, but your thoughts are eerily quiet as you let him clean and redress you. Maybe this was all meant to be, and this is where you belonged. Maybe he meant it this time – maybe he’d take care of you and keep you happy forever. And you have the baby to think about too – maybe this was best for the baby.

He carries you back out of the bathroom, only setting you down on your feet when he’s opening the exit doors to get back out onto the field. And even then, he holds your hand tightly – so tightly, as if you’re a kite that might fly away.

Outside, everyone is still celebrating – almost as if the two of you never left. You can see Sam and the rest of the football team popping open cans of beer and pouring it all down their fronts, or shaking hands with different people, or kissing their own girlfriends. Instinctively, Steve’s grip on your hand tightens even more.

“Hey, Cap! We’re taking a team picture with the trophy. C’mon!” One of his teammates calls out before the whole team begins to assemble themselves into haphazard rows while the professional photographer tries to guide them.

You feel Steve hesitating before letting go of you, grabbing your shoulders instead.

“Don’t move, omega. I’ll be right back.”

You nod, smiling softly, “Okay, Steve. I’m right here.”

It’s like he’s searching your face for something, and you wish to God you knew what because you’d show it to him in a heartbeat. But then his face softens, he grabs the back of your neck and pulls you close, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. And then he jogs away, joining his friends and being greeted with hoots and cheers and high-fives and chants of his name. He looks like a king on top of his world, standing up front and centre. Someone thrusts the gigantic trophy in his hand, and he holds it up proudly, smiling cockily at the camera.

You take it all in, feeling a mix of emotions ranging from pride for him as well as a certain sense of imposter syndrome. He’s a king and you’re an ant – but he loves you. He told you so, he told you so, he told you so–

“HEY!”

The repeated calling of your name doesn’t register to you until it’s right up against your ear, and you feel someone grip your wrist roughly, tugging you back. You turn around in alarm, mouth dropping open when you see who it is.

“Peter! What are you doing here?”

Peter looks dishevelled, out of breath as if he’s been running around all day. His spiky hair is longer than how you remember it, with brown locks tumbling down his forehead. His cheeks are flushed and eyes bright, the remnants of his fading black eye very apparent on his face. And his hold on your wrist is tighter than ever – just like how Steve’s grip was earlier.

Heart pounding, you glance back at Steve – but he’s still busy hoisting the trophy high in the air, posing for pictures and shaking hands with different people.

“Went to your dorm – you weren’t there.” Peter huffs, trying to catch his breath as quickly as he can. “Someone said you might be here – that the entire college was here. And they weren’t wrong – I’ve been looking for you in the crowd for ages. I figured this would be the best way, since he’d be too busy playing to notice anything.”

Peter casts a quick glance at Steve too, before pulling you further away. When he doesn’t stop, you tug back.

“What’re you doing? We can’t… I can’t be speaking to you, he’ll–”

“Come on!” Peter cuts you off, an almost desperate sense of urgency in his tone as he keeps glancing back at Steve. There’s a certain panic to his demeanour, as if he’s in a hurry. “Look, this is the perfect opportunity – he’s distracted, we can just slip out and –”

“Wait, Peter–”

“No, I’m not going to wait and neither are you!” Peter hisses, yanking your arm and pulling you further and further away, off the side of the field and leading to the stairs where a sizeable crowd of people is still mingling.

“Look, I spent a whole month feeling sorry for myself for getting beaten up… For letting him get the best of me. And I barely spared a second to think of you and what you must’ve been going through.” Peter’s talking rapidly, and he never stops moving, never stops tugging you but he does keep looking over his shoulder in Steve’s direction, his palm clammy as he holds on to your wrist. “But then you called, and you sounded distressed. I knew he wasn’t treating you right, I knew I had to do something.”

You swallow harshly, taking another look back at Steve – now his teammates have hoisted him onto their shoulders again, and he’s still smiling for pictures. A million thoughts race through your head, “Peter, I have to get back, he’s gonna–”

But it’s like Peter doesn’t hear you at all, as he determinedly pulls you up the stairs behind him and towards the exit. And you do want to speak to him, of course you do! You haven’t spoken to him for more than a month, and there’s so many things you want to ask him. But, but, but…

“I’m so fucking stupid for not doing something sooner. You were my girlfriend… You are my girlfriend and I should’ve taken care of you.”

You shake your head rapidly, “Peter, please listen! I don’t want to… I don’t think this is a good id–”

“You’re never gonna have to see that sick sonofabitch again, I promise you that much. I’m doing what I should have done that day I showed up at your dorm – take you away from him.”

“Peter, no, I–”

But either it’s the roar of the people around you or his own determination, but he doesn’t seem to hear your pleas. Everything’s happening too fast, the thoughts racing around in your head and the panic bubbling in your chest. Peter is good, you know this – and you know he means well. And yet…

You feel your mark prickle hotly, and you whip around in time to see Steve’s head snap in your direction. Your eyes lock with his for one single split second, and your mark throbs in pain and you feel a certain unrest in your bond, and it feels like you can’t breathe.

The hurt that flashes through Steve’s eyes is the last thing you see before you’re yanked out the exit and swallowed up by the crowd.

Well. If you managed to make it to the end of this chapter, thank you! I really hope you enjoyed. Guys, I poured my life and soul into this... and I hope I did this chapter justice. Please, PLEASE PLEASE reblog! And give me feedback. That’s what keeps me going honestly. I would love to hear what you think. In fact, i’m nervous to know what you think! And what should we expect for the next part? All I’m gonna say is... Steve’s omega has been taken from him, if he was mean before, it’s nothing compared to what he’ll be now. ALRIGHT BYE. and thank you for all your support! Love you guys!

[sorcerous-caress]

Taking you as their fake date to an event

[Fluff, suggustive, romance, humour, fake dating, nb!reader]

[Wyll, Gale, Shadowheart, Karlach, Rolan]

Wyll

In the aftermath of clearing the misunderstanding with his father, Wyll found himself back at the centre of attention in Baldur's Gate's circle of nobles. Everyone wanted to meet the famed blade of frontiers, for the last time they saw him was years ago before he fully matured into the man he is today.

Letter after letter were delivered to your camp. Carrier pigeons barely escaped Tara's claws as they dropped the mail on Wyll's tent and left with most of their feathers intact.

Being the son of the grand duke of Baldur's Gate turned all the heads of any sane noble with a marriage allegeable offspring. Invitation for tea parties, hunting competitions, and even balls for the sole purpose of meeting other people. Wyll's hand was slowly going numb from having to write back formal polite declining letters.

If only there was a way to stop them from the source. He'd sigh and vent to his closest of companions. But Karlach wasn't available at the moment, so he had to make do with the vampire.

"Why not just tell them you've already tied the knot with someone or whatever you humans call it?"

For once, Wyll actually considered listening to the fanged devil on his shoulder.

He approached that topic as delicately as he could when it came to convincing you, inviting you to dinner at a restaurant, waiting until after you're both filled and the lighthearted conversation slowed to bring it up.

"My friend, if I may, there is something I could use a helping hand with."

To his relief, you don't seem uncomfortable to his proposal. If anything, you nonchalantly agreed to be his fake date to the upcoming celebration.

He thanks you with a polite smile, yet for some, his heart beat faster when he pictures you holding onto his arm amongst the crowd. Your formal attire matching his suit. The fact he'd get to call you his fiancé for an evening sends an unexpected heat up to his face.

.

Gale

Tara wakes him up with delight in her eyes one morning, her sing song tone of his last name is more chipper than usual.

"Mr.Dekarios, yoohoo~" she licks his face to get his sleepy eyes to focus on her, "Ms.Dekarios sends her regards, along with a mandatory summon invitation for you this weekend." Tara brings her paw up to her face, cleaning the fur and making herself even more presentable.

Before Gale gets a word in, he is interrupted by a paw smacking against his lips.

"Now now, you wouldn't break the heart of your poor old mother by rejecting her invitation when you haven't seen her in years, would you?" The soft beans against Gale's mouth hold the threat of sharp claws underneath.

Defeated and outsmarted first thing in the morning, the wizard reluctantly nods with a sight.

Deep down, he know this day would eventually come. He couldn't hide the orb and the looming threat over his life from his own mother forever, no matter how he naively hoped to find a cure before having to face her. Coming back to announce you've foolishly consumed untamed magic of chaos isn't the most popular mother's day gift.

But maybe, just maybe he doesn't have to let her know yet. If he could find a distraction.

And lucky for him, the perfect distraction was currently standing outside his open tent, rubbing Tara's belly as she purrs and leans into their arms more.

He devised a plan, a great list of excuses and reasons to sell you the idea of why you should go along with his plan of deception, even prepared a bribe if push came to shove.

Well, two bribes, actually. The first one was the massive breakfast prepared and catered specifically for your taste.

Scurrying to sit in the chair next to you before Halsin could, Gale ignored the cofused look the druid gave him before sitting down at another chair.

Either he was too easy to read, or you've picked up on his pattern of gifts and act of service whenever he has a request. Because he only had to hint at the upcoming home visit before you Blatantly stated that you're willing to go as his date.

"Well...this was certainly much easier than I expected. In fact I've deviced a much more elaborate argument and explanation for when you'd initially refuse."

"Why would I ever refuse Gale?"

You gently caressed the side of his face, wiping a small crumb of bread away from his lips before taking your hand back.

"I...well, uhm. You." With a flustered look, Gale wasn't sure how to respond. Did he remember to comb his morning hair? Oh god, wait, is he still in his pyjamas? Does he even look half presentable right now?

.

Shadowheart

A Selunite introduction party, as her parents explained. She never had the afterparty of her ceremony after the woods passage trial, and her mother really wanted her to see her adorned in the moon maiden silvery dress and white flowers.

How could she say no? Shadowheart only wished for both of their happiness, to make up for lost time as much as she could.

While her father never pressured her, knowing he still has plenty of time with her, her mother wasn't offered the same courtsy by life. So he encouraged Shadowheart to bring someone dear to her maybe, just to reassure her mother that she has a loved one, you know how humans tend to get about finding your soulmate and all of that.

But she felt lost. Was there really someone she could call a soulmate?

Your words echo in her mind, how you gently persuaded her into lowering her weapon. The night orchid you've given her is still kept safely in her journal, tucked away between the soft pages to preserve the petals forever.

What if you don't share her feelings? What if she is just another lost soul that has grown attached to you after you saved them. Afterall, you did end up risking blowing your cover when saving that drow women at moonrise tower.

Minthara's respect for you was nothing to scoff at. What's a cleric's faith when compared to a paladin's devotion?

Yet she still took a chance, a leap of faith for you.

One night before the two of you retreated to your own beds, she stopped you for a short conversation. Reluctance in her voice as she lowered her face and looked up at you, eyes glistening under the moonlight.

She explained her situation, her party for her coming of age ceremony that was long postponed, how she wished for you to accompany her as her date.

"Please, indulge me this once. And we can pretend it never happened afterwards...if that's what you wish." The words pained her to say, but the relief that followed at your acceptance made all the pain worth it.

She isn't sure where your heart lays, but for a day, it will be hers. Her faith will guide her, the faith that maybe one day, you too will return her feelings.

.

Karlach

She was nervously walking back and forth outside your tent just after dinner, unsure of how to approach you or even mention the topic.

Her tail aggiated and is switching between curling around her leg and lashing at the ground below. Karlach didn't bury her emotions as the engine in her chest glowed more and more, matching the redness of the sunset in the horizon.

Really, what was she thinking? Agreeing to the double date her friends offered her. She was too excited at having finally met more people from her past, ones that didn't stab her in the back, and one thing led to another.

It's not that she ment to lie to her friends...it was just hard to tell them that even after all these years, she still doesn't have someone to call her own. It felt embarrassing to admit how alone she was, how touch starved and repressed she felt.

Not to mention how every single one of her friends had already found someone. Most of them were married and the other half on their way to get married.

She didn't think they'd make a big deal out of it when she off-handedly mentioned that she was seeing someone, a simple white lie with no harm done. She thought they'd just be happy for her and move on.

But no, instead, it was as if she grew a second head right then and there. Everyone was so excited to meet her so-called partner.

And so she found herself like this, strolling around your tent like a loser, attempting to muster up the dignity to ask you to pretend to be her partner for tomorrow.

Only when bumped into something and lost her balance did she realise who stood in front of her.

Karlach's body pinned you to the ground with ease, even unintentionally her muscles could easily cage you on. Her skin hot against yours, she lifted her head and your faces were mere inches apart.

You didn't miss the way her eyes glances at your lips, the way her cheeks darkned when you licked them. The heacy of swallow afterwards before her lips twitched into a polite smile.

With a quick apology, she helped you up.

"Say soldier, have you ever played pretend before? You know that game that kids play." Very smooth Karlach, she thought to herself. "Uh...do you think the two of us can maybe play it tomorrow? Haha...ha."

You asked what she meant.

"I kinda of...well, I told my friends that I was already seeing someone so. Could you be that person? I'll pay you back tenfolds, I promise."

"Of course Karlach, anything you want." Accepting the awkward fistbump she offered you, in return you gave her a hug that lingered for more time than it should.

"Cool cool, great. I'll pick you up tomorrow?" Her tail was swishing excitedly behind her, a confident smile on her face as bright as the sun.

.

Rolan

He will show them, he thought, he will show his spoiled bratty siblings that he isn't as uptight and "scares away all suitors" as they claimed!

I mean, have you seen him? He is a very talented and capable wizard, how is it his fault that other people are far too dim and slow to realise how much of a catch he is, how his talent more than makes up for his sometimes bitter personality.

Lia was bragging again about the cute bard she managed to ask out, her third date this week. Rolan swears she is mentioning within earshot if him intentionally, hell even Cal gets the occasional longing stares at any tavren they go to.

Rolan isn't less than them and he will prove it. He just well...hasn't put himself out there yet, so what if he has zero experience with dating and romance? He is a fast learner, he is very confident in his ability to become an excellent lover in to time.

A day goes by, then two and three. Suddenly it's been a full week and he haven't had a speck of luck when it came to romancing someone. It's almost as if any person he approaches immediately loses interest the second he opens his mouth.

He is getting desperate, he can't let Lia know about this. She will never ever let him live it down.

So when you find him in the elfsong tavren, sitting alone on a table nursing on his drink with his tail curled around his leg. You stare at him long enough to catch his interest.

He recognises you immediately, you could see the cogs turning in his alcohol clouded mind.

"You, come here." He yells the order across the tavren, catching himself afterwards and clearing his thraot to lessen the embarrassment of the situation. Still his eyes begged you to approch him.

And you did, walking to his table and sitting down. After all your companions were still sleeping upstairs so what's the harm in indulging one drunk grumpy tiefling when you were supposed to be on a supply run.

Rolan orders you a drink too, his treats, he says without meeting your eyes.

And just as you take a sip, he lays it on you bluntly.

"From now on, I'm your boyfriend."

You choke on your drink, it takes him a moment to register the way he phrased his question.

Clearing his throat again, he refuses to meet your eyes as a blush colours his cheek. "No not like this, don't get the wrong idea."

Now you're sitting there, confused as the waiter brings you a towel to wipe down the drink you spilled on yourself. You thank them and take it, giving Rolan enough time to attempt to compose himself.

"I know i haven't made the best of impressions on you." He finally speaks up, "but I need you." His voice is more honest, a hint of vulnerability, "your help I mean. Lia and Cal, I want to prove them wrong."

His glossy eyes meet yours, the alcohol loosened his tongue.

"I'm not unlovable." He whipsers, "I'm not going to beg for a chance, I just need your cooperation for a day or two, just to shut them up."

Your hand goes above the table, wrapping around his own fist softly. "I understand, it's okay." You give it a light squeeze, "you don't have to explain yourself."

Somehow, your few words helped relieve his heart from its burden more than this whole night of drinking ever could.

[shadowshrike]

Interfering with Halsin's Portal

It's pretty well known that there are a few situations you can get in where Halsin is well and truly angry rather than disappointed or worried, but I don't think a lot of folks know one of those situations is if you mess with his portal to the Shadowfell. It's a heartwrenching bit of acting. It's also fundamental to the plot of my in-progress fic Girdled Roots, so I figured I might share it with the other Halsin-lovers out there who have never seen it.

EDIT: Please be aware this is datamined dialog and may not be visible in game. It appears to be intended to trigger if the player attempts to enter the portal, which I don't believe is possible in the final game, or at least I couldn't find a way in the most recent version. Sharing this is simply to enjoy the incredible acting and get some plot bunnies moving, not to make any commentary about the game's canon.

Halsin's Initial Reaction

Halsin: No! Stop! Halsin: It's gone... that was our one chance. You've doomed this place to darkness! Halsin: I warned you - told you this was my burden to carry. Why didn't you listen?

The pure rage and despair is visceral. Prior to this, Halsin mentions this portal has been a century in the making, but he's so calm and measured (even upon success) that it is easy to dismiss just how much agony has plagued him as he hoped to make things right. This chance is everything to him. It has guided his every action for a century. It is a hundred years of work, prayer, and guilt to rectify the horrific fate of both land and people that came to nothing because a stranger he trusted refused to listen to him.

The portal breaking is the only time we hear Halsin speak the truth of its importance to him without a hint of emotional regulation. He is wild with pain. This man who is always thoughtful and slow to anger in the face of horror with the wisdom of age and suffering to guide him has become too overwhelmed to show any kindness.

Player response

The player is given several different ways to respond, and Halsin's reaction varies a surprising amount depending on how understandable their reason is. In most cases, he states that he needs to be alone afterward.

Option 1: I'm sorry - I acted on instinct. Halsin: Words won't repair what's been done to this land. Nothing will... I need to be alone.

You can hear the ache in Halsin's voice, but he's somewhat understanding of this response. He projects more sadness than unchecked rage. The player has admitted to making a mistake, and Halsin isn't the type of person who hold onto vengeance when an apology has been made, but he's not naive or people-pleasing enough to say "it's okay" or offer comfort either. The safest thing for everyone is for him to step away to grieve when there is nothing more to be done.

Option 2: I did all the work here - I couldn't just let you take the glory. Halsin: Glory?! There's no glory here. Now there's nothing here - only shadows and the total absence of hope. Halsin:  There is nothing more to be said... I need to be alone.

Pure fury radiates from Halsin's response if the player focuses on the idea of being some grand hero rather than actually caring for the outcome. What the player did was an unforgiveable act, dooming everything that Halsin holds dear, and you have the audacity to complain about not getting glory from it. Again, he steps away, but this feels more like he's doing it because he believes you're worthless to reason with rather than because he needs a moment.

Option 3: I saved your grove - I figured it'd be best if I handled this as well. Halsin: We were this close to healing these lands. Now your arrogance has torn open the wounds once more. Halsin:  There is nothing more to be said... I need to be alone.

Halsin is still frustrated with this response and unmistakably angry, but it's significantly toned down from the idea of wanting to go through the portal for glory. More like he thinks you're a self-important idiot than a truly terrible person.

Specialized player responses

There are also three special responses you can give if you have a particular class or diety.

Druid: I thought my powers were equal to yours. Halsin: It wasn't just power this needed - it was wisdom, understanding. I suffered along with this place for years trying to understand the curse... and it seems I will continue to do so. Halsin:  There is nothing more to be said... I need to be alone.

Interestingly, he responds much more intensely to a druid than some of the other player choices. It might be in part because he feels like a druid should know better. He lectures the player like an Archdruid would initiates in his Grove, alternating between angry and explanatory, trying to get the player to understand why they were wrong and the sheer magnitude of their error. He ultimately ends in a much more resigned place here rather than personally resentful. Like a father-figure being forced through further life trials because of a child's foolish indiscretion. Frustrating, but inevitable.

Selunite: I trusted in Selûne to guide me through the shadows. Halsin: My friend - I wish you had trusted in me.

This is probably Halsin's most simple response with the least vitriol. He fully understands this answer, even if he's disappointed by it. The fact he calls the player 'friend' suggests a certain tired acceptance of this being a natural behavior for a Selunite trying to do good. We don't see this calm in other responses where Halsin was surprised by the player's choice.

Sharran: The Shadowfell is no place for non-believers - I couldn't allow you to soil it. Halsin: I should never have trusted an ally of the Dark Lady.

If you've ever taken Halsin along with Shadowheart in Act 2, then you know he is absolutely scathing toward her and her faith. He likely isn't as angry if a Sharran breaks the portal because it is utterly predictable. It merely confirms a truth he already knew and talked himself out of. That Sharrans cannot be fully trusted in matters of their goddess, even if one was good enough to rescue his people from the goblins.

[fairyofhee]

WHAT YOU NEED | l.heeseung

PAIRINGS. heeseung x afab!reader

SYNOPSIS. when you caught your boyfriend cheating, his best friend aka your roommate suggests to get revenge by asking you to fuck him. you refuse at first, but then the idea excites you. okay you weren’t actually going to fuck your roomie, you were just going to lie. but the problem was that your boyfriend asked for proof and now you had to make a sex tape with someone who you weren’t sexually attracted to.

WORD COUNT. 13.8k

GENRE. smut, unrequited love, best friend’s girlfriend, slight fwb, roommates to lovers, angst, hurt, bickering, naive people, heeseung is a bit cocky, slight perv!hee, college fic, jealousy

WARNINGS. 18+ only; MINORS DNI. profanity, fingering, masturbation, oral sex (m. receiving), protected sex, blindfolding, filming porn, slight drunk driving

“Bro what the fuck?” Heeseung yelled through his mic. He was playing his video games and continued for a while until his body jumped to the sound of the front door slamming. It was always quiet in the apartment, especially at night, so he immediately paused the game to check out the sudden sound outside his room.

“Uh I’ll be right back guys,” he said to his friends before taking off his headset and exiting his room.

Heeseung walked towards the only shared space in the apartment with both hands in each of his pockets and finds you aggressively washing dishes in the kitchen.

You knew he was present in the room but you didn’t say a word or look at him once. “What’s up with you?” he said with a judgmental tone.

“Now’s not the time Heeseung,” you roll your eyes, not in the mood for his attitude and remarks. Heeseung placed both hands atop the kitchen countertop, carefully watching you pour cereal into a bowl that you had just washed.

You felt his eyes set on you, you figured that he could sense your uneasiness, but you didn’t bother to care.

“Hey,” he lowered his upper body to meet your height and narrows his eyes at you, noticing your eyes all red and puffy. “Have you been crying?”

Your lip quivered as you quickly wiped some tears that were a bit dry in your eyes. “No,” you scoffed, voice cracking lowly.

His brows quirked up, he’s never seen you like this before. “What happened?” he softly asked.

Your head drops to let out the tears that you’ve been holding in soon as the question left his mouth. You cover your face with a hand, feeling ashamed sobbing in front of your roommate that you perhaps only talk to about three times a day.

The urge to keep it all in was very hard for you, of course, because yesterday after meeting with your professor to ask a question about an assignment, you caught your boyfriend in the parking lot with his hand gripped around some girl’s ass then opening his car door to let her in. God knows where they went or what they did.

You didn’t call or text to confront him because a big part of you was in denial, since it’s been two years of being healthy with each other. You guys never fought, argued, or lied. When you went home yesterday, you told yourself to wait until he was going to be honest and tell the truth. Your gut churned last night when he never called or texted.

You ignored what you saw yesterday, and today, you left a couple of text messages to him, asking about his whereabouts and if you were going to see him around school today. He left a message that didn’t even sound like it was sent from him.

[5:42 pm] jeongin: i got sick sorry for not answering.

You tightly held onto this hope that he would be honest, but instead you felt like you just got hit with the biggest brick of reality when he didn’t. Your boyfriend is obviously cheating on you.

Not able to hold the heartbreak and pain any longer, you were now letting go of everything you have felt for the past two days. Hot tears streamed down your face and you squeezed your eyelids shut in hope that the tears would stop.

It felt odd, having a tightening of your throat and a short intake of breath while in the kitchen of your apartment. Gut-wrenching sobs tore through your chest and it was painful to see you like this.

Heeseung stood frozen in his place fighting the urge to pull you into his embrace and let the torrent of your tears soak through his shirt. He knew there were clear unspoken boundaries between you guys. You both were respectful to each other’s space so pulling you close for a hug and touching you felt like a risk to him. But wanting to calm you down, he took the risk and stood behind you to gently rub your back as his sign of comfort.

Much to his surprise, you didn’t disregard his touch. No, you didn’t mind Heeseung’s comfort since he’s your roommate, however, it’s an unusual sight to see because you guys know almost nothing about each other. You only knew that he’s a slight asshole and smartass who can cook well, but likes to leave his wet clothes in the laundry for hours. He only knew that you’re a busy prestigious student who’s dating his best friend.

Whenever your boyfriend would come over and Heeseung invited his friends, you had no choice but to hang with them, because yeah, your boyfriend didn’t want to leave you alone in your own place. It was a pretty normal occurrence that happened about once a week. You didn’t mind these hangouts, but you didn’t have much fun either, watching boys play video games and drink.

These hangouts were also a way to get to know Heeseung more — someone you had to live with because you needed a cheap place to stay and your boyfriend suggested to live with his best friend. But all Heeseung did during these hangouts was tease you, saying things like:

“Y/N shouldn’t you be studying?” or “Isn’t it your bedtime Y/N?”

To this day, you don’t know if he’s just putting up a strong front and trying to be funny in front of his friends or if he is actually immature and a dick. Though, he only teased you because he liked the comments you would say in return. Based on these hangouts, there was still much to learn about each other.

You felt Heeseung’s hand removed from your back when you’ve calmed down with his help. after steadying your breath back to normal and wiping your tears, you turned around to see him handing you a glass of water.

“Thank you,” your words almost come as a whisper. Heeseung pats your head while gazing at the round sad eyes formed on your face. He stood for what it felt like minutes, waiting for you to spill what happened, but he knew you guys weren’t close enough to tell each other what was going on so he stepped away to head towards his room.

“Jeongin cheated on me.” You blurt out, stopping Heeseung in his tracks. You watched as his face turned baffled at your words. “He wouldn’t do that,” he derides, in much denial just as you are.

“Of course you would say that,” you sneeringly laugh, “He’s your best friend.”

He shook his head without thought, “Nah, we haven’t been friends for a while.” Your face then makes the same baffled face that Heeseung just had. “But you guys seemed cool last week when he came over,” you protest in a disbelieving tone.

Heeseung sits on the chair in front of the kitchen island countertop while you were faced across from him, taking a bite of the cereal that was now soggy. “He told me to act cool in front of you,” he watched your face as it became more quizzical.

“We’re not anymore because he was getting insecure that I’m living with you.”

Your tongue flicks the roof of your mouth. You were dumbfounded at your boyfriend’s sudden change of feelings. “But he was obviously okay with it when I moved in,” you whined, still in disbelief. “I mean, wasn’t he the one who told me to live with you?”

“You moved in a year ago,” Heeseung remarked. “I think his feelings have changed.”

Yeah his feelings for me, you mentally say. It was somehow quick, but you weren’t in denial anymore. You were angry that he threw away two years for somebody else, and the way that he didn’t communicate his feelings of insecurity and decided to befriend Heeseung for simply living with you added to that anger built inside.

You exhaled in irritation while also feeling a bit sorrowful that Heeseung lost his best friend. “You never told me,” you murmur in a sympathetic tone. “Yeah, because we only talk about groceries or if rent is paid on time,” he laughs, taking the situation more lightly that you’d thought.

“I don’t think he would cheat on you Y/N,” he wholeheartedly believed. “Before our fallout, he would ask me every night to check on you to see if you made it home safe. I found it fucking annoying because he should be the one to text you,” he was irritated just thinking about it. “But I knew he did it because he cares.”

You appreciate Heeseung’s way of trying to make you understand but yes, your boyfriend’s feelings have changed. “You didn’t see what I saw Heeseung,” you stress your incredulity. “His hand was on someone’s ass and they went somewhere to probably fuck,” you raised your voice emphasizing your outrage.

Heeseung took note of your anger and pondered for a moment while trying to hide his stare at you. “Do you wanna piss him off?” he suddenly says.

You were in the middle of eating until your head shot up at his question, “What do you mean?”

“Like- get revenge,” there was that same sly grin on his face when he would tease you. “Revenge?” your brows furrowed in a bemused manner, “Isn't that a bit childish at our age?” you almost laugh.

“Maybe,” he shrugs. “But it would be fun,” he rests his elbows on the countertop as he leans forward, giving you a look of intrigue, “And I think it’s what you need,” he adds.

You shake your head, “What do I need?” you had a hard time comprehending his words.

“To finally get fucked by some actual good dick,” his round-like eyes slightly squint.

Ew, you mouth and give him a look of disgust. “If you’re implying your dick then gross. I would never fuck you,” you harshly tell him.

“Never is a long time.”

“Whatever,” you brush off his comment before grabbing your bag on the table to finally go into your room. Heeseung turns in his seat as he watches you walk away. His throat bobbles before speaking his next words, “You know how angry he would get if he knew we fucked?” He raised his voice so you could hear him clearly.

You turn around, giving him a chance to let him finish what he wanted to say. “He would regret cheating on you,” Heeseung declared. You slowly roll your eyes, feeling tired and overwhelmed by all of the emotions you’ve felt the past two days.

“What if I don’t wanna get revenge?” You sigh.

“You’re too nice then, Y/N.” Heeseung says in a low voice, trying to convince you. “Okay…,” you drew out the word, the trace of fondness not leaving your tone. “But what about him? Isn’t he your best friend?” you shrug.

“He’s the one who dropped me remember?” He reminds you with his voice turning soft.

“I’m going to sleep,” you say when heading to your room, not giving even a second to think about his suggestion. No way would you fuck your roommate for some revenge. You were too mature and busy for some childish games.

“You’re missing out!” He yells across the room with his chest puffed out with confidence. “Sure, goodnight Heeseung!” you yell back when you’re finally in your room.

After getting ready for bed, you finally had some downtime to just chill and watch movies on your computer. You thought about your encounter with Heeseung today and how it started from you crying, to him asking you to fuck him.

You found Heeseung attractive, I mean who didn’t? When you first met him while moving into the apartment two years ago, you were in literal shock of how unreal he looked. He was handsome and you were quite jealous of his strong facial structures and beautiful skin complexion.

But would you fuck him? No, you don’t sexually see him like that. Heeseung probably doesn’t know that you know, but once in a while, you can hear him fucking girls in his room. The walls are so thin that you can hear his moans and the phrases he says in bed. Thinking about it doesn’t turn you on, not even a little bit. You can’t imagine yourself in bed with your foolish of a roommate, let alone being physical with him.

Heeseung, on the other hand, had a certain unknowing desire and thought in the back of his mind. He wants you. To him, you are the most attractive person he’s ever seen. When Jeongin initially told him that you needed a place to stay, Heeseung was okay living and being a roommate with his best friend’s girlfriend because he didn’t think anything of it. But as soon as you walked through the front door of the apartment when moving in, he couldn’t help himself but just stare.

Heeseung would get so happy whenever you would hang out with him and his friends. His jokes and dumb remarks were directly made at you because he loved watching how you reacted. The expressions and comments you would make in return had Heeseung smiling so hard that it felt embarrassing of him.

A huge part of Heeseung feels guilty for feeling this way. There was a time where he heard you and Jeongin having sex. At the time, you thought Heeseung was away and not in his room, but he was listening the whole time. Hearing your loud moans and your words of “Fuck yes,” and “Deeper- harder” made him aroused to the max.

He almost jerked off to you that night, feeling a bit bitter it wasn’t him making you scream. He also thought it was too far and wrong so he stopped before he did anything. He told himself to back off and respect your guy’s relationship because you were his best friend’s girlfriend.

Seeing you cry today shattered his heart. It was the first time he’s ever felt heartbroken. He wanted to kill Jeongin for breaking your heart, but he also felt guilty for having a small tangent of hope when he heard that Jeongin cheated on you. Heeseung was selfish and thought that now was his chance to make you fall for him. He proposed his idea of getting revenge for fun, but now he can’t stop thinking about it.

It was late at night, Heeseung knew you had class early tomorrow so he assumed that you were asleep. He played music that was loud enough to fill his room just in case you were awake.

He plopped down onto his empty bed in his dark bedroom, having a gut feeling that he’ll regret this later on. He wiggles deep into the bed with legs bent and bare skin gliding across the sheets trying to get comfortable. Heeseung thinks about you giving him kisses from his lips then down to his body. He feels a pulse of heat shooting straight to his rising cock from the thought of you touching him while also straddled around him.

Heeseung wants you so bad — he did for a while. He whines a little, a throbbing feeling between his legs. He imagines you touching the base of his length up to his tip. “Y/N,” he quietly groans, tugging at his hard cock that’s an angry red color with precum leaking at his slit. He grabbed his length, slowly moving his hips up and down. His thoughts began to run as he imagined you atop, sinking down and deep onto him.

The sloppy sounds of his hand moving feverishly against his cock echoes into the room, he prays that music was all you could hear from his room.

His mouth is open, eyes are closed, and his tongue drooling when he started to move faster and faster, thrusting upwards imagining you riding him. The slick sound of his hand moving up and down on his length turned him on even more, and he felt himself nearing his peak. “Wanna fuck you so bad my good girl,” he whined before giving a few more strokes until he was cumming. He heavily breathed, watching his cum spill on his abs then reaching all the way up to his chest.

It only took a few minutes until guilt hit him. He couldn’t believe what he had just done. Most importantly, he didn’t know how he was going to face or talk to you tomorrow.

—

To his luck, you were out and about all day, attending a few classes and studying for your exam at the library. You honestly didn’t know how you had the motivation to study, but it was the only thing occupying your mind aside from your boyfriend. And the thought that if he was still your boyfriend or not distracts you. An aching sensation hits you hard in the chest, realizing that he threw away you so quickly.

You debated whether you should go to his house and talk to him, or not, because weren’t ready for the sudden change of him not being your life anymore. You still love and miss Jeongin.

But then it was the same scene again. You found him with the same girl in the parking lot when you left the library — this time he was now kissing her. Your heart sinks but now you’ve accepted it.

Accepting the truth of him cheating leads you to knocking on Heeseung’s door. You needed someone to talk to- but not about your feelings.

You wanted revenge.

Prior before standing outside his door, it was awfully quiet when you got back home. You knew Heeseung was in his room because his car was parked outside. However, you didn’t hear anything or a slight sound of movement. It was strange when moments later after getting ready for bed, you hear loud music playing in his room.

Heeseung knew you were home. He saw you park your car outside the apartment, but he still feels shameful for what he did last night. His only way to avoid you was to pretend to be asleep.

“Heeseung?” you called out as you knocked on his door. He was scrolling on his phone in bed until your voice caused his head to instantly shoot up.

He wanted to ignore you, but you never knock on his door. His curiosity led him to figure out what you wanted. “Yeah?” he says after opening the door, eyeing you up and down at what you were wearing. You had on tight shorts and a long sleeve shirt for pajamas. The shirt was a bit transparent and you never wear bras to bed so your bare breasts were slightly noticeable.

Heeseung gulped dryly as he quickly moved his eyes to meet yours, trying to not get caught when clearly checking you out. Aside from his spiraling thoughts of what you were wearing, he was concerned on why your eyes were drooping.

“I saw him again with that girl and they were kissing this time,” you told him, not giving him a clue to where this conversation was heading.

His eyes widen and again, his heart aches, feeling hurt for you. No one should ever go through that, especially you, he thought. “I’m sorry, Y/N.”

You gave him a reassuring nod, appreciating his empathy and implying that you were going to be okay, even if you weren’t. “W-what if we just said we fucked?” you suggested, suddenly feeling shy.

Your fingers fiddle with each other as you dazed off when you too had no clue where this conversation was heading. “I don’t think he would know if we didn’t right?” you say after building the courage to look him right in his eyes.

To say that Heeseung was speechless was an understatement, he actually didn’t know what to say. He didn’t expect you to take his words so seriously. “Y/N, are you sure? I think you’re just angry and overwhelmed by everything right now.”

You were taken aback by his response, “Why are you suddenly opposed? You’re the one who came with with the idea,” you remark.

Heeseung quietly grits his teeth, a feeling of frustration takes over him. Of course he wants to go with his idea, the problem was that he didn’t want to ruin you and your good character. But a part of his mind told himself to take every chance that was given to be able to be close to you.

“Fine,” he spits out. “But I think it would be more believable if I were the one to text him.”

Your face lits up in excitement, “Yeah you’re right, go text him right now.” You pushed the feeling of immaturity aside. Right now, you wanted the satisfaction of your ex boyfriend feeling salty when he finds out that you’re ‘fucking’ his best friend.

While in thought of this whole thing, Heeseung grabbed his phone to text Jeongin. The sound of him typing on his phone instantly grabbed your attention and you watched as a big grin forms on his face. He looked so impudent, yet very serious and concentrated.

You leaned one side of your head on his door, waiting for him to be finished while feeling anxious for what he had sent. “Okay here,” he says when showing his phone to you.

[10:32 pm] heeseung: you were right to be worried about me living with your girlfriend. i just made y/n cum in a few seconds, had her squirting and screaming my name. she said my dick stretched her out better than yours.

You look up at Heeseung after reading his text message. He quirks a brow when you seemed unamused and irked. “What?”

“Your choice of words are very vulgar,” you were a bit unimpressed, feeling a bit icky.

Heeseung lowly scoffs, “What else am I supposed to say, Y/N? That you had my penis in your vagina and we just had sexual intercourse?”

“Nevermind,” you stressed after shaking your head, “What did he say?” Heeseung looked at the notification from Jeongin who surprisingly replied fast. “He asked for proof,” his voice fell flat.

“Proof?” Your voice crescendos. “Is he serious?”

“Yeah,” Heeseung let out a sigh and nodded before passing his phone to you, “Look at what else he said.”

[10:34 pm] i.n: y/n wouldn’t fuck you bro. she knows who she belongs to.

Heeseung nibbled his lower lip, watching apparent anger slowly spring up on you. “Let’s just ignore him,” he pleads, not wanting Jeongin to cause an reaction out of you, “I don’t think he’s worth your time.”

You huff out a chuckle, shifting your daggering eyes to Heeseung. “If he wants proof then let’s give him proof,” you say bitterly which makes Heeseung rub his temples.

“I thought you said that revenge is childish and you don’t want to fuck me?” he quotes you, feeling unsettled about the words coming out of your mouth. “I know,” you let out a long exhale, “But I can’t let him walk around happy with someone else after he fucked me over. Twice.”

As much as you love Jeongin, you knew that you didn’t deserve this treatment. You weren’t going to let him treat you like a toy– like someone who was going to wait around for him. Heeseung believed this too, which causes him to go with your plan and help give whatever you wanted.

But he also didn’t want you to feel like you had to fuck him because it was your last resort to revenge. He wanted everything with you to be real and not some act. “Maybe we should do something small to see what he says first before do we anything further,” Heeseung suggests.

“Do you wanna send him a video of you sucking my dick first?” He asks almost comically.

“Okay sure,” you let out without thought.

Your sudden response causes his heart to skip a beat. “Oh, I was joking,” he lies and nervously chuckles. “But if you’re cool with that then I’m so fucking down.”

Damn, you truly hit the lowest point that you’re going to suck your roommates dick – your boyfriend’s best friend! – for some light revenge. You always think about the consequences of your decisions, but right now you couldn’t seem to.

You give a nod before walking yourself inside his room, not noticing his elated expression. You’ve went into Heeseung’s room multiple times during hangouts, but now it suddenly felt smaller with the air thickening when it was just you two alone.

“Wait, are you clean?” you turn around to face him when near his bed. “Yes I’m clean,” he utters in defense, “Haven’t had my dick sucked in a while and I don’t fuck raw.”

You emphasize an expression of ‘good to know’ with the bob of your head. You look at Heeseung standing like a deer frozen in headlights, which makes you a bit confused. “Aren’t you gonna sit on the bed?” you question. “Or are you too nervous?” you tease him with a playful smile.

“Shut up,” he sits on his bed, manspreading as you stand close before him. “I’m nervous it’s not gonna be believable because my dick won’t be hard,” Heeseung says ironically, trying to convince you that you don’t turn him on, but he felt his cock already twitching from staring at the way your clothes were hugging your body.

You were too oblivious to this fact though, shrugging off his comment because you believed that Heeseung didn’t find you attractive. It was pretty understandable since you were his best friend’s girlfriend, and finding you attractive would cross a small boundary. Getting hard by you was a huge boundary in which Heeseung already crossed.

“Do you have a blindfold?” you ask, glancing around the room looking for a piece of clothing that you can use. “Why do you need a blindfold?”

You slightly smile, “You’re not gonna get your dick hard if you look at me,” you murmur, trying to make the air less weird and uneasy. Heeseung sucked down a deep breath, not fond of not being able to see your mouth on his cock.

“How am I gonna take the video?”

“Don’t worry, I’ll take it off when I start sucking you off,” you casually say, which brings relief to Heeseung. He felt the corner of his lip twitch, “I have a sleeping mask in the drawer behind you.”

After obtaining the mask, you stand in between his spread legs and put the ‘blindfold’ on him. “Just relax, Heeseung,” you tell him with a deep breath, but your words were actually for yourself. Despite how eager you were to get back at your ex, you were apprehensive about putting your roomie’s dick in your mouth — let alone making a porno and trying to make him feel good because your ego couldn’t handle not making him cum.

You almost never sucked off your own boyfriend which made you feel a bit pressured. But again, this was all for fun to get back at Jeongin. Why were you overthinking this way too much?

“I am relaxed,” Heeseung leans further back with both elbows dipped on his bed. “Let’s go baby,” he tilts his head down to his crotch then back to you, giving the greenlight to let you do whatever you want to him. Deep down, Heeseung wasn’t all relaxed but he did a good job not showing it. He was nervous that he was going to cum too fast which would be suspicious.

You took a deep breath to settle yourself, hoping to make him hard at least. As Heeseung is leant back, spreaded out, and blindfolded, you begin to bring your knee to his clothed crotch — feeling his bulge. When Heeseung met your contact, he tried his best to not smile. He can’t believe that this is really happening, it wasn’t just an imagination.

Your hand goes down to his pants, palming him softly as breathy noises were bubbling up from his throat that he tried to hold back. You then climb into his lap and sit on top of him, glimpsing at the little smirk on his face.

He was enjoying your touch and you noticed this, but didn’t give it much thought. You wanted to add onto his enjoyment though, so you start slowly grinding on him as his hands are pressed onto your hips, guiding you as you roll onto him.

You quickly put his hands aside, wanting to do all the work. “Does this feel good?” You asked before pushing his upper body so that his back was entirely on the bed.

Heeseung gave no answer, but he was in fact already hard and you atop of him felt like ecstasy.

“Answer me,” you plead, still rolling your hips.

Poor Heeseung. His hands were tightly gripping his sheets while he held his breath, not able to speak and trying not to show how turned on he is.

“F-feels so good,” he choked out.

You then felt his hard length beneath your core. Does he actually get hard this fast? You were smiling, also enjoying this and honestly feeling proud that you’re able to make him weak to the point that he was choking out his own words.

Something in your mind hits you and you felt the need to push him to the edge just to get him back for all the times that he teased you. You lean forward so that you’re resting on his chest and your lips meet his neck. Slowly and gently, you pepper his neck with kisses.

Heeseung felt your soft lips on his skin and your warm mouth drove him mad. He starts to become frustrated to the point that a grunt leaves his lips when you continued grinding on him. He’s completely losing himself.

“Wanna taste your cock baby,” your words almost come out as a whisper. You could’ve gone off of him a long time ago, but you were having too much fun. Heeseung on the other hand, shakes his head, having enough of this. “Yeah? Wanna feel your mouth,” he badly wanted to take off his blindfold and fuck you on his bed.

You knew he was in some pain with the way his chest was heaving and his jaw clenching, “I think you’re hard now,” you finally climbed off of him.

Heeseung quickly sits up and takes off his blindfold, feeling his face heat up. His eyes wander down to see his dick almost protruding through his pants. “Thanks,” he clears his throat while glancing at you. You nod with arms crossed, unable to think of what to say next.

“Gonna pull out my dick now,” he begins to loosen the tied strings of his sweatpants. “If you can't fit it in your mouth then we can try something else.”

“Yeah whatever,” you scowl, “It’s gonna fit.”

You watch as Heeseung takes his time taking his sweatpants and shirt off. He starts to feel himself sweat, reasons being that he’s nervous, yet excited to have his cock on full display for your eyes to see.

“If you want to back out now, it’s okay to.” He practically asks you before proceeding. As much as he wanted this, he didn't want the air to be weird between you two. And worse, didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable.

He didn't have his boxers off yet, but you could sense that he would surprise you. You weren’t curious to see what his dick looked like until you sat on his huge bulge and felt his length grow big.

“Is your phone ready?” you say, implying that you still wanted to do the plan. Heeseung nods before grabbing his phone and pressing on the camera app. You grab a pillow and place it in between his feet before kneeling. He then shakes his hips to get rid of his boxers, finally revealing his naked body and hardened cock in front of your face.

His head turns to the side when he’s grinning after watching your eyes go wide at the sight of his length, resting flat against his abdominal. He almost laughs because he thinks that you're too cute, it's like you’ve never seen a dick before.

Heeseung surprised you, as you sensed, because it was so red, so veiny and hard, almost pulsing like it was impatiently waiting for your mouth. His slit leaked precum, was this all because of you?

It was silent for a moment as you both were caught up feeling and thinking differently.

Before you reached your hand out, you watch Heeseung’s spit fall from his mouth onto his tip. He starts to stroke himself, mixing and spreading his precum and his saliva. He felt himself twitch at each stroke and at each glance of you watching him.

You decide to take over now by removing his hand and licking the tip of his cock. A hand was stroking him while the other held his thigh. A heavy breath left his mouth when you pressed a few gentle kisses on him. There was a clear indication that he was already weak.

Heeseung moaned out in surprise the moment you put him in your mouth. “Fuck,” he cursed out when you began to suck and lick his cock like it was the most amazing thing you have ever had.

“Go deeper baby,” he impatiently begged as his hand applied pressure on the back of your head, guiding you. You do as he wished, taking inch after inch into your mouth and eventually reaching your throat. “Yeah, just like that,” he groaned, feeling himself entirely wrapped around your warm mouth. Heeseung planned to stay quiet and suppress his lewd noises, but you were sucking him like a pro while continuing to stroke him and play with his heavy sack.

In the moment, he didn’t care how loud he was. He couldn’t hold it in for much longer. And you hadn’t expected Heeseung to be so loud all because of you, but it was satisfying hearing him groaning and whimpering. It made you felt like you were doing something right.

Heeseung’s head tilted back, lost in the feeling of you. He wanted this moment to last forever, but he still remembered the plan. Already feeling close to hitting his peak, he quickly grabbed his phone and started to hit the record button.

He starts recording his fucked out face first while pushing your head deeper, letting you know that he was getting close and recording. He’d expected you to pull back and question him, but instead he felt you speed up.

“Fuck, that’s it,” the camera was on him. He made sure to show how good you are doing by letting out loud, obnoxious moans with eyes rolling back. You glance up at him and it was a sight to see.

Heeseung’s whole body was stuttering, making it difficult for him to record so still. He turned the camera around so it was on you now, and you just sucked harder and faster. “My good girl,” he growled, resting a hand on your head that was bobbing up and down.

You tried your best not to choke when you felt him becoming close. At the same time, you knew Heeseung was recording and you told yourself to give the best suck of your life — not afraid to let out a few moans as well. You’ve never sucked your boyfriend’s dick like this before, surprisingly this was enjoyable for you too. “Y/N, I’m- cum-“

Soon, you felt his cum puddling in your mouth and shoot onto your entire face when he came. You give a look to Heeseung, happy to have such a strong taste on your tongue then quickly down your throat as you swallow. Of course this was all for show, he reminded himself, but he couldn’t help but leave his fingertips dancing along your chin. “My pretty girl did so good,” he murmured, still recording your face full of his cum.

Heeseung rides his orgasm by stroking himself as you stand up to give him a kiss on the cheek, emphasizing the sound of your lips against his skin to make sure the sound was audible through the recording. He turned off the recording a few seconds later, going back to reality, and felt his chest ache when you quickly dropped your smile.

It stung that it was all an act.

Heeseung passed you a clean shirt to wipe your face after he put his sweats and boxers back on. You were surprised that his cum made its way onto the back of your hair, you definitely needed to shower tonight.

“I just sent the video,” Heeseung said, watching you clean up. You honestly felt uneasy that there’s now a video lying around of you sucking dick. The video was also recorded on Heeseung’s phone and he doesn’t plan to delete it unless you ask.

“He usually replies fast, did he say anything?”

Heeseung looked at the empty notification on his phone, “No, he didn’t.”

You throw the shirt that you used to his hamper and make your way towards the door. You had a feeling that Jeongin was with the girl you saw him with, not giving a shit about your revenge. “Hey,” Heeseung calls out, “Where are you going?”

“I’m gonna study after I shower,” you tell him with your thumb pointing towards the door. Heeseung lets out a low chuckle, his expression unreadable.

“Aren’t you like a little horny?”

You laugh, his question catching you off guard. “No, why would I be?” you said your words a bit too grim and Heeseung felt his dick soften.

“Okay, good luck on studying,” he gave you a closed-mouthed smile, “And thanks for tonight.”

“Yeah,” you shrug your shoulders like tonight wasn’t a big deal. “I hope I was good,” you felt the air becoming awkward tension.

“You were more than good,” his voice deep and husky, as if his throat was dry.

“You should do it more often,” a racy tone quickly returning as if he turned it on with a switch.

You roll your eyes like it was a reflex response to his playful comments. “Let me know if he says anything. Good night,” you say, walking out of his room and closing the door on your way out.

You walked back to your room having an uncomfortable feeling between your legs. You sigh, realizing what it was. Okay, you were a bit wet– no your panties were pooling with wetness and you possibly felt butterflies in your pussy during the whole time you sucked him off, which is why you rushed out of his room so quickly.

Were you sexually attracted to Lee Heeseung? Your roommate? No way, you initially thought. You hesitate before pondering about this for a few hours until you decided that maybe you needed to test out this theory.

You were back outside his door, yet this time you were nervous and super horny. “Sorry, are you busy?” you asked Heeseung after he opened his door when hearing your knocking.

He was fresh out of the shower, and his hair was wet and he smelt so good that the feeling between your legs was getting more uncomfortable. How was this possible?

“No, what’s up?” He questioned while holding the ends of the towel that was around his neck.

“Umm, I can’t sleep and I’m horny.” You glued your eyes on the floor, not wanting to see his reaction. Your words cause a “Yeah, how could you not after sucking my dick?” out of his mouth.

At his response, you turn around to walk away, regretting knocking on his door that led to feeding his huge ego. You felt his hand grab your arm before you could walk any further, “Wait I’m sorry,” he huffed. “How can I help?”

You lick your lower lip knowing what you want but also being hesitant. “Just make me cum with your fingers,” your words come out in a rush.

Heeseung grinned at your nervous expression. He simply gave a nod and fully opened his door to let you in. “Lay down for me,” he demanded as he placed the towel on his chair, and you do what he says and lay on his bed with your head resting on his pillow with your legs bent open for him. Heeseung watches before he kneeling in front of you to help to get rid of your shorts, leaving your bottom half in nothing but your underwear.

He then lays next to you on his side with an elbow propped on the same pillow, a hand already dipping inside your panties to reach your core. You immediately clench onto nothing and almost shiver, feeling sensitive to his touch. “You’re so wet,” he begins to spread your wetness. “Is this all from sucking my cock?” he looks up, making intense eye contact with you.

“No,” you swallow, getting rid of the dryness in your throat. Heeseung furrows his brows and removes his hand, “You don’t have to lie.” You break his eye contact, feeling heat onto your cheeks. It’s a good thing that his room had dim lights to hide your flushed face.

“What are you doing?” you ask, watching him get off the bed to find something in his drawer. In his hand was the ‘blindfold’ you had used on him earlier. Heeseung makes his way towards you and slowly puts the blindfold on you. You don’t say or question anything, going with the flow of things. You trusted Heeseung, one reason being that you lived with him for a year and other reasons in ways that you couldn’t explain.

You felt the bed dip due to Heeseung’s body, he went back into his position with an elbow propped up, his eyes carefully trained on every detail on you. “Just forget it’s me and say everything on your mind. Tell me how you want to be touched.”

Your thoughts of neediness makes you laugh out loud, in which Heeseung ignores. “Ok,” you softly murmur. “Want you to touch me here,” you manage to grab his hand and lead it under your shirt. Your breath hitched when you felt him give your bare breast a squeeze.

“And want you to kiss me.”

“Kiss you?” you thought he said in a disgust manner. You couldn’t see Heeseung’s face turning pale, not expecting you to want a kiss, especially from him. “Just do it please,” you embarrassingly begged. “Please, you told me to say what’s on my mind,” you throw his own words at him.

“Sorry,” Heeseung apologized, his mind fuzzy on what the hell was happening. Him having you on his bed and extremely horny was almost enough to make him blow his load. You knocking on his door asking him to finger fuck you is real. His heart jumped realizing this wasn’t at all an act.

Fidgeting your fingers is something you did when you’re nervous. You had no reason to be nervous since it was just Heeseung, your roommate who you had no sexual attraction for. Maybe you were just scared that the theory was right.

You felt Heeseung’s large hand cupping your chin to pull you in for a gentle kiss. It catches you by surprise that he’d actually kiss you, but you lean into his touch, feeling his soft lips. His mouth was tender against yours and a hand guided your face closer as he lightly licked his way into your mouth. You didn’t know what to expect when kissing Heeseung, but the kiss was great, meeting the exceptions that you didn’t have.

You feel his presence next to you gone until he was now on top of you, pressing his body against yours. You left a low groan of approval before your warm tongue tickled his. Heeseung kissed you with passion, you weren’t the only one hungry.

You don’t hesitate to pull down your panties until the clothing reaches your thighs. “Touch me here again,” you pulled away from kissing him to reach for his hand and guide it down to your core.

Heeseung was surprised to see your panties already off, “Are you eager for me?” he mumbled against your lips, trailing his hands down you thigh, ironically wanting you to beg for him.

His touch tickles your skin while the realization of wanting Heeseung hits you. “I-I thought you said to forget that it’s you touching me?” you deny your sexual desire for your roommate.

“It doesn’t seem like you want to forget it’s me,” Heeseung vocalizes and you gulp, trying to think of a valid excuse. “I just want to use your fingers please. Don’t think anything of it.”

Heeseung pushes his feelings aside, wanting to do the job of making you feel as good as possible, because it was the least he could do in this situation. He presses a quick kiss on you before making contact on your folds with his digits. He circled his thumb around your clit as you bit your lower lip, preparing yourself to what's to come.

A pathetic whine leaves your lips when you feel Heeseung plunge his thick finger inside you. Your hand bolts to his forearm with nails leaving marks on his skin at the sudden stretch.

“You’re so wet, but so tight with only one finger in you,” Heeseung says. You take a deep breath, waiting to take more of him. It’s too bad that you can’t watch his movements- what he’s about to do. Everything was a surprise for you.

“It’s been so long-“ you felt your walls clenching around him when he adds another finger to it.

He sprinkles sweet kisses on your jaw with both digits inside you, starting off slow but still moving. He curls upward and ends up pressing against a spot that you’ve never even thought was there. a spot that your own boyfriend didn’t manage to discover. “Heeseung,” you accidentally moan out causing his dick to twitch. It was evident that you didn’t want to forget it’s him who’s making you feel this good.

His only complaint was that he wished he took out his cock and jerked himself off while ramming his fingers inside you. “Who’s making you feel good, huh?” he said with a pensive face that wasn’t visible for your eyes to see. You stayed quiet, not wanting to say his name again. You ignored his words by lifting your hips to take him deeper until you whined aloud when you felt him gone. Before you could take off your blindfold, he did it for you.

Heeseung was knelt in front you with a deadpan face and his fingers in the air, glistening from your wetness. You sat up just enough to see him and shake your head, feeling confused and a bit mad that he suddenly stopped.

Heeseung holds his two digits in front of your face. Without much to say, you take them in your mouth — tasting yourself and sucking them clean. When you're done he puts them in his mouth, tasting both of yourself and your saliva.

You found the whole scene hot and you clench, already missing his fingers. It was like he could hear your thoughts when he shoved his fingers back in your hole, this time you were able to see how he was moving inside of you.

His fingers were thrusting in and out of you faster and deeper. Your eyes were staring at the ceiling and almost closed shut, it was becoming too much but it felt so fucking good. “Fuck, I think I’m close,” you groaned.

Heeseung moved even faster. The sounds of your wet pussy squelching loudly echoed into his bedroom. “Look at how my fingers are fucking you,” he grabbed your arm to get your attention.

You raise your head, trying to keep your eyes set on his fingers going in and out of you, but his face distracted you. There was a wrinkle in between his brows and he stuck his tongue out, just enough to where the tip is poking out.

Heeseung looked up, catching you staring at him, and you immediately watched at how he was fucking you, while feeling embarrassed that you got caught. He quietly laughed, knowing that you found him attractive and were close.

“Look at me while you cum,” Heeseung grunted for you to look at him. “Or I’ll stop again.”

At his words, you felt a deep pit in your stomach while thick fingers continued to roughly curl deep in you. You fought the urge to look away — to not look at him, but you desperately needed to cum.

You met his eye contact with fluttering eyes. he began to rub your clit with a thumb, sending you over the edge. “Ahh-“ your mouth quickly opened when a loud moan poured from your lips as you came. “Shit,” Heeseung cursed out watching your hips stutter when you emptied yourself on his fingers. It was the hottest thing he’d ever seen.

Once you met your peak, you quickly put your panties back on feeling suddenly vulnerable. You avoid Heeseung’s eye contact as well when he was licking his fingers of you clean. You were making the situation awkward as hell, but your feelings were all over the place and you didn’t know how to feel at the moment.

“Don’t be like that,” Heeseung pleaded while watching you put your tight shorts on. You turn your head at his voice, “What?” you couldn’t help the clueless expression on your face.

“You just gave me the best suck of my life and I almost made you cry with my fingers. It’s too late to do this awkward shit,” his fear of things being weird between you two was growing.

He was right. You were making things weirder than they should be, but you can’t help feeling overwhelmed. “Sorry,” you exhaled, “I just got cheated on and now I’m doing things with you. I can’t help but feel a bit- strange.”

“I know,” Heeseung affirms. “I get it Y/N, you’ve been with him for two years and this is all sudden.” You nod, feeling grateful that he understands. How is he so understanding?

“Thank you,” you expressed gratitude. You watched as the corners of his lips turned upwards. Despite his feelings for you, Heeseung was your friend and he had to act like it.

“And thank you for tonight,” you laugh while scratching your head and looking at the boy who didn’t want you to leave. “Goodnight Hee,” the nickname leaves your tongue which causes his face to lit up, “For real this time.”

“And I don’t regret anything,” you say before you left his room completely, not knowing where this leads you two. This was all Heeseung needed to hear to reassure himself that everything was going to be okay. Things maybe not the same, but okay and possibly normal with you.

—

A couple of days later after I guess you can say your mutual masturbation with Heeseung, things have been quite the same in the apartment. That night was never mentioned again and you were back to regular roommates with no sexual or awkward tension present.

His friends Sunghoon, Jake, and Jay came over again once a week, and you were forced to hang with them per Heeseung’s request. It felt different without Jeongin present but you tried not to think about it.

The question of whether or not Jeongin replied to your porn video still remained. You’ve been meaning to ask Heeseung but were hesitant since things were ‘normal’ again.

Not all things were normal. You still found yourself horny for Heeseung. It was quite unavoidable when you see him everyday and his room is on the other side of the apartment. You fought so hard to get rid of this feeling in your stomach and down to your core especially when knocking on his door was so easy. What held you back was not wanting to ruin the chance of losing a roomie.

“Hey did Jeongin ever text back?” you finally ask as soon as you entered your apartment after class. Heeseung was sitting on the couch and watching a movie while eating chewy candy. He turned his head around when you spoke.

“No he didn’t,” he said, watching you peering at the open fridge. “Oh okay,” there was disappointment expressed in your response.

Did Jeongin hate you this much that he didn’t care that you were messing around with his best friend? You start to question your two year relationship with him. “What do you want for dinner?” you interrupted your own thoughts.

Heeseung eyebrows rose a notch, “Why? Are you going to attempt to cook?” he gawked.

You turned to give a hostile glare, “What do you mean attempt? I know how to cook asshole.” You refuse to let him doubt your cooking skills.

“Well, I want anything that doesn’t require you using the stove and burning down the kitchen,” he chortled then sent his eyes back to the movie.

“Why are you so mean to me?” you asked as a joke, but also seriously, curious to why he always teased you. You thought his teasing jokes were subtle ways to show that he sees you like one of the boys. Oh how you were so wrong.

Heeseung heard your remark then approached you in the kitchen. An unintentional heavy breath left your mouth when he stood awfully close. Your eyes go straight to his lips when he’s standing before you. You hate that you wanted to kiss him again, you shouldn’t have these feelings. Maybe it was just sexual attraction and nothing more, but regardless, he was just a roommate. An already broken boundary you shouldn’t cross.

“I’m sorry it just comes out like a reflex,” he teased again before giving you a slight push, forcing you to move since you were blocking the fridge. When he found nothing and looked unsatisfied, he turned his head to you again.

“I want anything your creative mind makes,” he pats your head before walking to the couch to turn off the tv and heading in his room. Patting your head is a habit that he started last year, but he does it frequently now and you didn’t mind it.

Heeseung had a hard time ignoring his feelings and pretending that nothing happened that night. If anything, that night solidified how much he liked you. If only he knew how you felt about him.

—

More days went by and you were finally healing from your cheating ex. A big part of your healing had to do with yourself — but you couldn’t deny that a small part had to do with Heeseung.

Despite whenever you both felt about each other, you were now closer as friends. You learned more about each other during movie nights in the living room that would happen almost every night. You guys went grocery shopping together and were even invited at the same parties. Well, one party.

Tonight was Sunghoon’s birthday and he was hosting a party at his house. Heeseung’s friends were now your friends, so of course you were invited. Even though it would be convenient for you and Heeseung to attend together, you both agreed to go separately since you had a late class. Heeseung offered to stay and wait until your class ended but you refused his offer, not wanting to keep his time away from his friend’s party.

The party was bigger than you’d thought. Music was blasting loudly and there was so much alcohol, which made sense since Sunghoon turned 21. The house was overfilled with people like the entire campus of students were here.

You haven’t attended a party since high school and being in the middle of crowded spaces freaked you out. You searched through the crowd for Heeseung, his friends, or even the birthday boy, but they were nowhere to be found. You left Heeseung a text before you entered the house, asking where he was but there was no response.

Luckily, Jay approached you when he caught a few random guys offering you drinks. Jay walked you to the kitchen so you can finally breathe from suffocating in the wave of people. “Do you want water or a drink?” He asked after getting himself a beer. “Water’s fine,” you kindly nodded.

“Do you know if Heeseung’s here?” you take a sip of the water jay gave you. He shook his head, “I saw him a few minutes ago but he disappeared.”

You checked your messages again and still no response. Why were you getting worried? “So,” Jay cleared his throat causing you to put your phone away. “Are you and Heeseung…” he slightly tilted his head from side to side, insinuating that he knew something. You instantly knew what he meant by the way his brow arched.

“What? No,” you tried to laugh. “I just got out of a relationship. Heeseung and I are just friends,” the accusation made you more flustered than it should. “Why, did he say something?”

“No,” Jay laughed before pausing. “Jake and I accidentally saw that video,” the words slipped out of his mouth and you swore you felt your heart dropped out of your chest.

“The one where you…” he did the typical ‘sucking dick’ motion with his hands.

“Stop. I know what video,” you sneered. How the fuck did they see that? “We only saw like a few seconds of it. We were using his phone to order pizza and it was in his camera roll.”

That means he hasn’t deleted it. Should you feel happy? angry? “That meant nothing, we were getting revenge on Jeongin.” You defend yourself with redden cheeks. Jay nods his head, “Yeah, Heeseung told us.” Your heart was having a hard time beating back to normal.

“It’s funny how you both reacted the same though,” he pestered, “All freaked out.”

You shake your head finding his comment funny, “That was my first porn video okay? I thought Heeseung deleted it.” Lie. You never asked him to.

Before you grabbed yourself a beer, thinking about not being sober tonight, you see Jake walk with a girl in his arm. Sunghoon also trails behind him and they all greet you, including Jake’s girl.

“Hey where’s Heeseung?” Jay asked because he knew you were looking for him. Sunghoon and Jake both shrug their shoulders, not knowing where he was.

“He’s with Yena,” the girl in Jake’s arms said. At her words, you reached for the cooler and grabbed yourself a beer, taking a big gulp of it. The boys looked at you in shock. “Who’s Yena?” Jay questioned for you once more.

“Choi Yena, the girl he’s fucking upstairs,” Jake’s girl announced, “She’s a third year.” Jake tapped her shoulders, indirectly asking her to stop talking when he saw your unpleasant face. You pressed your lips flat and stared the floor, a weird new feeling entered your chest. Something felt tight inside and you obviously knew what it was.

“I think I’m going to go home. Happy birthday Sunghoon, sorry I can’t stay. I have an early class tomorrow,” you murmured after placing the empty beer bottle on the corner of the kitchen counter. The boys showed concern, asking if you were okay and needed a ride home. You put on a fake smile and said you were good enough to drive home. You weren’t drunk, yet not all sober.

“Do you want us to tell him something when we see him?” Sunghoon asked and you instantly shook your head. “No, it’s okay.”

You walked out of the party feeling miserable. You made it home safe and stupid tears came out of your eyes as soon as you went into bed.

You like Lee Heeseung and it was hard to deny.

—

The truth was that Heeseung tried to forget his feelings for you. He convinced himself to get laid at the party, thinking it would solve his problems. So tonight when he had a couple drinks in his system, he met Choi Yena. He made out with her and eventually both of their clothes were off, but things horribly escalated when Yena asked him if he could fuck her with his fingers.

Of course this reminded of you — you knocking on his door after sucking his dick, asking the same thing. He couldn’t do Yena. He liked you too much that fucking someone else felt wrong.

Heeseung didn’t know you felt the same way, but he stayed loyal to you anyways. He left Yena alone in the room, running downstairs looking for you.

“Did you see Y/N yet?” Heeseung hurriedly asked Jay who was in the backyard. “You just missed her bro,” Jay lightly scoffed. “Why’d she leave?” his voice thick and unsteady.

“She overheard that you were fucking Yena,” Jay explained and Heeseung’s heart dropped as he took out his phone. Fuck. Two delivered text messages and a missed call from you. “I have to go,” there was a guilty look of his face as he stormed off. Jay was left alone, laughing at his intuition that turned out to be right.

Heeseung was sober enough to drive home. He didn’t know if you knew that he was with Yena tonight, but his heart raced hoping you didn’t. He wanted to talk to you tonight and settle what’s going on between you two because finally, he knew how you felt. You were jealous. He wasn’t sure if he was going to confess his feelings, but he was tired of this unclear tension.

You unfortunately pretended to be asleep when he came home and knocked on your door. You didn’t want to see him with tears in your eyes.

Because this time you were crying over him.

—

You weren’t lying about having class in the morning. Your class was too early that you almost fell asleep from the events of last night. Then suddenly, a notification on your phone caused you to jump in your seat. It was from Jeongin. You cursed at yourself, forgetting to block his number.

[8:46 am] jeongin: i need to talk to you. meet me outside in the front after your class

Now he wants to talk? Thoughts invaded your head. Maybe he watched the video. Maybe he wanted to beg for you to get back together with him. Possibly, this was closure.

Simultaneously, you get a text from Jay, which was unexpected since you forgot that you guys had each other’s number.

[8:48 am] jay: sorry that this text from me is random and you probably think that this is weird since i’m awake at this hour

heeseung didn’t fuck yena. he actually left her to look for you then went home after

You let out a huge sigh of relief but you felt odd, thinking about your jealously when you thought Heeseung was fucking another girl. You regret storming off at your friend’s birthday party and feeling that way because you guys weren’t a couple. You regret showing your jealously in front of his friends. It was quite humiliating.

Despite that, one thing you thought was: Does Heeseung know why you stormed off last night?

—

Heeseung still planned to talk to you today. The problem was that he forgot you had an early class, but in his favor, he had time to prepare what to say. Was he going to confess?

Heeseung was nervous. He was so nervous, he had to piss every five minutes. There was about ten minutes left until your class ended so he sat on couch impatiently, glancing at his phone and watching time slowly pass by, waiting for you to come home.

You took longer than expected and he was getting impatient. Promptly, he heard the rustling of the keys and stood to watch you walk in. All he thought about was finally seeing you and not the way he looked super awkward and a bit creepy when staring at the door. Once the door open, a quick frown and a hint of anger fell upon his face.

“Motherfucker,” Heeseung blurted out when he saw no other than Jeongin, standing in your guy’s apartment. “What the fuck are you doing here?” Heeseung approached him and sounded more angry than he had intended to be.

“Y/N gave me her keys,” Jeongin waved your keys in the air. It’s been three weeks since Jeongin called off the friendship and him cheating on you. They haven’t spoken to each other since. “She didn’t tell me that you were coming,” Heeseung’s voice went deep, not believing that you would let your stupid ex step foot in the apartment.

“She told me to pick up her jacket since it’s cold outside,” Jeongin said before walking further into your home like it was just a normal day. “Let me do it,” Heeseung urged with a shake of his head, trying to block the entrance of your room.

“No,” Jeongin lightly pushed Heeseung aside. All Heeseung wanted was to punched him in the face, but he held himself back since Jeongin was his best friend and he was your boyfriend.

“You’re not her boyfriend,” Jeongin laughed as if Heeseung was dumb. Heeseung clenched his jaw, frustrated at the scene. He didn’t expect to argue with his ex bestfriend today.

Jeongin was in your bedroom now, looking through your closet. “You’re not her boyfriend either,” Heeseung gave him a hard scoff.

At his response, Jeongin’s face fell with a sudden change of expression. “She didn’t tell you?” he said wryly, which left Heeseung stunned. His heart practically jumped out his chest, no way he thought, understanding what he had implied.

“You and Y/N got back together?” he asked with a shaky voice and churned feeling in his stomach. he felt sick. It was like was going to throw up.

“Yeah, we just made up this morning,” Jeongin stated and Heeseung stiffened as he stood in disbelief. “How’d you make up?” he asked an abnormal question that caused a laugh out of Jeongin. “Of course you always would like to know the details.”

“It’s not like that,” Heeseung fought back. “You fucking cheated on her, so I’m surprised that she would go back to you,” he was bitter and pissed. Rage fueled inside him because after everything he’s done, how could you go back to him?

Heeseung wished he knew what was going inside your head, he wished you could’ve chosen him.

“We’ve been together for two years. She told me that she still loves me and we fucked in the car after her class,” he paused. “I’m sure she missed that too,” Jeongin spits out, watching Heeseung stand speechless and defeated.

“I have to go,” Jeongin closed your bedroom door, “Can’t keep her waiting in the cold.” He grabbed a sweater from your closet and a small bag that was left close to your door before leaving.

Heeseung clenched his fist in exasperation. “Fuck!” he loudly yelled, anger overpowering him.

He was angry at everything. Angry at you, Jeongin, angry that his feelings got in the way of just being roommates. He should have never initiated that revenge plan, because now it seems like you just used him to get back together with your ex.

—

Your meeting with Jeongin was pretty simple. He told you he watched the video and in fact, He admitted cheating on you. Rather than being angry at the video, he begged for you to take him back. Obviously you told him to get lost, not forgetting the emotional damage that he’d done.

Your clear feelings for Heeseung also helped to admit to yourself that you wanted to be with him. But you were still hesitant to confess to him, feeling unsure if Heeseung felt the same way. You planned to keep this facade that he was just a roommate, a friend, and nothing more.

When you came home after meeting with Jeongin, Heeseung’s car wasn’t there. You even knocked on his door and there was no answer. He probably had a class, you thought. You put on a movie and sat on the couch, waiting all day for him to come home. It worried you when he didn’t.

[6:27 pm] you: hi are you coming home? i plan to watch toy story tonight :P

[7:49 pm] hee: sorry, i’m not gonna be home tonight or for a few days

[7:50 pm] you: is something wrong?

[8:21 pm] hee: nah. my mom just wants me to stay at her place for a while

[8:24 pm] you: ok come back home soon

[8:26 pm] read

Your chest pained noticing that he read your message. He was acting off, acting like you guys weren’t friends anymore. Overthinking questions took over your mind. Did Jay tell Heeseung the actual reason you left the party so early? Was Heeseung uncomfortable living with you knowing how you felt about him? You were scared.

It felt like months living in the apartment by yourself, but it has only been a week since Heeseung left to stay with his mom. It was lonely.

You ate dinner with yourself, went grocery shopping with yourself, had movie nights by yourself. Even Jay, Jake, and Sunghoon didn’t come over, which made sense since they were Heeseung’s friends. You still missed the company.

Does Heeseung hate me? Am I losing him? Your thoughts continued to take over again, and again.

Heeseung felt like a pussy when he temporarily moved out of the apartment. He wasn’t the type to run away, but you were the first girl who made him feel this way. It’s was understandable that he was making irrational decisions. He felt like a teenage boy, heartbroken that his crush was with someone else. He hated feeling this way.

And you’d never thought that you could miss someone this much until Heeseung wasn’t around. It was the same lonely routine every day, and it fucking sucked because it wasn’t that you missed having a roommate. You just missed him.

It’s been three weeks. You and Heeseung haven’t talked at all — not one text message or call. You both loathed allowing your friendship fall apart.

—

Heeseung’s mom forced him to come back to the apartment, not for you though. It was because he skipped classes without a reasonable excuse.

You were in your room until you heard the door open. In a swift movement, you were in the living room and watching Heeseung come in. It was embarrassing how quick you were to greet him.

“Hey,” you said a bit too happy, surprised to see him home. Heeseung gave you a quick smile before walking in the laundry room. You follow him, even if it seemed annoying since he just got home, and he didn’t bother to acknowledge you.

“You know, I missed you.” You rest your hand on the dryer and watched as he dumped his clothes in the washer from his bag. “Hm?” he hummed, still occupied, pretending that he didn’t hear you.

“The apartment was empty without you,” you went straight to the point, not caring that you weren’t being subtle about your feelings.

Heeseung was quiet for a long time, he didn’t have a response, not one that you would be happy with at least. He continued putting his clothes in the washer, acting like you weren’t present. He was stubborn to the extreme and you hated it because his reasons were unknown.

You mentally curse in your head, guilt creeping upon you when you blamed yourself for how he’s acting. “Heeseung, I’m sorry if the revenge plot was too much. I’m sorry if it’s like I used you.”

“It’s fine, Y/N,” he quickly responded, finally lifting his head to meet your gaze. “I’m the one who came up with the plan,” Heeseung mumbled before leaving you alone in the room. You follow him once more, not caring if you were bothering.

There was something he wasn’t mentioning and he was closing himself off. “Do you wanna fuck me this time?” You let your impulsive thoughts win, “Or do you want me to suck your dick again?”

Heeseung instantly turned around, “What the fuck are you saying?” He looked appalled by your cold tone and abrupt words. You felt your chin quiver, fuck it was like you were about to cry.

“I haven’t seen you since the day of Sunghoon’s party and you have been ignoring me since,” you let out a loud exhale, pulling yourself together. “Did something happen or did I do something?”

You heard resentment when he sighed, “What do you mean ‘did something happen?’ Why are you asking me to fuck you when you have a boyfriend?” Heeseung said calmly, but he sure didn't feel that way. “You got cheated on, Y/N, remember? Are you gonna cheat on him like he did to you?” Confusion kept rising inside him, he fought to not let it turn to rage.

You stared at him for a few seconds, before regaining your composure, “What are you saying? I broke it off with Jeongin the day you went to your mom’s place,” you tell him as he listens.

“He admitted to cheating,” you both froze and stood there for a moment until you spoke again, “I broke it off with him for good.”

“He came over and told me that you guys got back together,” Heeseung tried to keep his voice low, explaining his encounter with Jeongin while having a slow realization of what actually happened. “He said you guys fucked.”

“We didn’t fuck,” you gave Heeseung the truth, “And I should’ve let you know, but I told him to pick up his things in my room since I had class and couldn’t do it for him. He gave me back the keys so he won’t be coming here anymore.”

Heeseung was quiet for a long time. He didn’t have a response because he was busy feeling stupid for being played by Jeongin.

“Was that why you left?” You interrupt Heeseung’s conscience, “Because of what Jeongin said?”

He nodded. “If I saw you that day I would’ve yelled at you. I would’ve asked why the fuck you would go back to him.” You took in his words while deep lines appeared on your forehead.

“You would be that mad if I got back together with him?”

“Yes,” Heeseung spoke. “Because I want you to be with me,” His last words spilled out and you stared at him in shock. Heeseung hadn’t expect to confess so soon but he couldn’t wait anymore.

“You mean that?” you asked, slow and processing his declaration. Of course you had feelings for him as well, but you tried to bury them, thinking he didn’t feel the same.

“I thought it was obvious that I want to be with you,” he let out a sound that was similar to a laugh. You approach him close with a shake of your head, “It wasn’t obvious to me.”

“Maybe I was too naive because of my feelings for you,” you smiled hopefully at him with your heart pounding, as anticipation built up inside wondering what he would say.

Heeseung’s cheeks heat at the endearment, “Feelings for me?” he repeats your words, wanting you to say aloud how you felt about him.

“I want to be with you too, Lee Heeseung.” There wasn’t an ounce of hesitation when you answered him. “Fuck,” you burt out, “A month ago I would’ve thrown up if I ever said those words.”

He rolls his eyes at your attempt of teasing.

You then watch as Heeseung approaches you, cupping your face with both hands, looking at you with desire. You lean into his hands before he kisses you softly. The kiss was sensual, causing both of your hearts to race in unison.

“I can’t believe he played us,” your mind still occupied of what Jeongin did, “We were supposed to get revenge on him.” You lightly complained at the plan that backfired. “Do you wanna fuck and send him a video?” Heeseung suggested, noticing your disappointment.

“No,” you were quick to refuse. “I don’t want him to see you balls deep inside me,” you say before he could speak. Heeseung gives you a kiss, trying to ignore his uncomfortable feeling down there. You lace your fingertips with his and lead both of you into your bedroom.

You pushed him, just hard enough so that he was sitting on your bed leaning against your headboard. His brows rose at your sudden dominance, enjoying every second of it. You climb atop of him as a raspy breath fell off your lips when he stripped you in a matter of seconds.

He loved the view of you removing his shirt while straddling him. It was nothing like he had imagined. You hook your fingers into his waistband and pull his pants down just enough to draw his hard cock out. He bites his lip hard enough to bruise, your touch igniting his skin.

He takes his fingers and brings it down to your core, you were wet enough that he didn’t need to prepare you, but he did anyways. Heeseung shoved his two digits inside you, stretching you out so that you’re able to take his length.

You were both in shock of how easily he was able to slip his fingers while moving in and out. Once he removed himself, you hurriedly opened the drawer of the nightstand next to your bed to get a condom. Heeseung massages your ass with a smirk on his face, grateful that you remembered to use protection. You open the foiled packet and roll the rubber onto him. Heeseung watches your movement and hisses, feeling sensitive and ready to be inside you.

You stroke him, signaling that you're ready to take him. Heeseung nods before you lift your hips and align his cock with yourself, his hands resting on your hips as you hold onto his shoulders. You watch as you carefully lower yourself and he helps you by slightly bucking himself in the air to meet you halfway. He stretched you out perfectly, a strangled groan left you mouth when it stung. It took time to adjust to his size, but Heeseung didn’t mind, wanting to take his time with you.

“Good?” Heeseung asked, looking for any discomfort on your face after a moment of silence. “Yes,” you began to roll your hips after adjusting, earning a deep groan from him. You grabbed ahold of his shoulders to steady yourself as you increase your pace. "Kiss me,” he breathed and it took you a moment to look at him.

Your face heated up because of the lustful expression on his face. Finally, you brought your lips onto his and and the kiss was sloppy, loud, and wetter than ever. You could feel that he was desperately trying to get closer to you by the way his arm wrapped around your waist, causing your chest to fully become pressed against his own.

He gently bit and pulled on your lower lip before slipping his tongue in your mouth. Your walls squeezed around him with each moan you let out.

“H-heeseung,” you groaned without thought. He gripped your hips as you bounced up and down on his twitching cock. “Hm?” he hummed, unable to let out words that made sense.

“I l-love your dick,” you vocalized, still holding onto his shoulders for leverage as you moved faster. Heeseung bucked his hips while grabbing your breast before putting it into his mouth.

He kisses your breast and sucks on your nipple for a while until he felt your legs begin to shake. He started to maintain a steady pace for you, noticing that you were getting tired. “You close?” he asks and your moans turned into whines, wordlessly begging for him to let you come.

Your legs couldn’t keep up anymore, since it’s been so long since you were on top. Heeseung seeing it in your face, grabbed you with one arm and turn both of your bodies around, his length not slipping out of you once. He was now hovering over you, his cock going even deeper.

You tried your best, holding that feeling in your stomach and clenching on him as he was increasing his pace with each hard thrust. “I can’t hold it in,” you tried your best not to groan and release with pleasure. “You can do it, I’m almost close,” Heeseung said. “Please, for me,” he choked out as you threw your head back into the pillow. You let out a whimper as he placed a hand on your hip, gripping it to angle deeper and faster.

Heeseung was watching you with hard eyes as you took his cock in ecstasy. “Look at me, Y/N,” he heavily breathed before you opened her eyes. you glanced at his muscles flexing while he was keeping a rhythm that was becoming too much.

Your mouth parted and Heeseung took the chance to kiss you. Your lips met, exchanging warm breaths and loud moans into each other’s mouths while he continued rocking his hips. “Hee-,” you begged as you hugged him closer.

“Come,” he softly kissed you, slowly slowing down his rhythm but still fast enough for you to meet your peak. “Cum for me,” he growled. your mouth quickly opened when a loud moan poured from your lips as you came. “Fuck-“ Heeseung cursed out, his hips stuttering as he emptied himself inside the condom. You felt him collapse on top of you, kissing your neck as you held his shoulders with your face nuzzled into his hair.

You both took a few minutes catching your breaths together until Heeseung finally slid out of you, tiring the condom off and throwing it in the trash that was next to your bed. You watched as he rolls his body to lay next to you. “Go pee,” he tells you, removing hair that was covering your face. After you went to the bathroom, he patted the space next him, a smile plastered on his face, wanting you to lay next to him.

He helped to shift your body by putting his arm around you so that your head was placed on his chest. “I have a question,” you announced, hearing and feeling his racing heart. “Shoot,” his husky voice responds, open to answer anything.

“Did you masturbate to the first video we made?” you questioned, still remembering that Heeseung probably hasn’t deleted that video on his phone.

Heeseung trained his eyes so that it was on you. your curiosity caused a big exhale out of him, “Yeah, I did,” he said simply, “Every night.” You raised your head as you lightly slapped his chest.

Your eyes grew big at his honesty, “You pervert!”

Heeseung surrendered himself with hands in the air, “It’s not my fault that you looked too good having my cock in your throat.”

At his cheesy response, you give him a quick kiss. “We can still make a sex tape,” you propose. “But just for our eyes to see…”

“And not our friends,” you stare intently at him. Confusion twists his eyebrows together, until he realized what you’d meant. “I’ll save it in a private album next time.” You grin at the thought of the ‘next time’ with him.

Heeseung kisses the top of your head while shutting his eyes and pulling you close into his embrace. He expects to wake up next to you, hoping that this is not a dream, that this is all real.

You lay happily in his arms — falling asleep, waking up, and living next to someone you have never thought could be yours. Maybe this whole time, Lee Heeseung was just what you needed.

© 2022, fairyofhee on tumblr.

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[hiraethwrote]

angel - suguru geto

[ suguru geto - f!reader ]

✧ summary: left heartbroken after your boyfriend leaves his entire life behind, destroying everything in his path, you try to go back to a normal life. until youre silent wishes has come true, and you see him again ✧ cw: canon events from hidden inventory, HEAVY angst, mentions of murder, established relationship, no use of y/n, featuring platonic!satoru ✧ word count: 4.2k

⋆⭒˚｡⋆

Slumping down the brick stairs, you kept your gaze on the hunched over figure, sitting on one of the bottom steps, facing the sun setting in front of the two of you.

“Didn’t take you long to find me,” Satoru sighed as he straightened his position. Taking a seat two steps above him, you wrapped your arms around your legs in hopes you’d physically be able to keep yourself from falling apart.

“I’ve been searching for you all day so,” you trailed off.

Both of you stared absentmindedly at the sunset, and you couldn’t remember ever being graced by such a beautiful view. Too bad it felt like such a waste, unable to enjoy the genuine beauty of it because what was the point? Your entire world had been turned upside down, to the point where you didn’t really recognise it.

“I assume you talked to him,” you would be surprised if Satoru even managed to make out what you said, barely audible words slipping past your lips. He didn’t answer you, but the deep sigh that left him gave you confirmation he heard you. “Yaga told me—“ a gut wrenching sob killed the sentence in your throat, the reality finally starting to set in. Pressing the palms of your hands to your eyes, you were hopelessly trying to stop the waterfall of tears that were streaming down your cheeks.

“I’m sorry,” Satoru spoke in an uncharacteristically low voice. Every inch of you wanted to find the strength to stop the violent sobs so you could answer him, desperate to talk to someone who might actually be able to understand how you felt. But there was no fight left in you. For the past weeks, as things had escalated, you’d denied yourself the privilege of crying. You had tried to fool yourself into believing that the longer you held back your sorrow and cries, the longer you could live under the impression that all of this wasn’t real.

Sadly, the time of living in naive hope was over. Even though you so desperately tried to cling onto this delusion, it was slowly but surely slipping away from you. Now you were facing the heartbreaking truth; the love of your life was lost. The unspeakable things he had done causing him to deviate from his life, from his friends, from his future. From you.

To top it all off, what had happened was on the lips of every living person in the Jujutsu world. The promising and strong Suguru Geto had killed one hundred and twenty people.

“He looked so…” Satoru said. “Like himself.” The sadness was written all over him, just like it was with you. “I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t kill him.”

A few more deep sobs escaped you before you managed to find a rhythm where you could be able to hold a conversation. “I didn’t expect you would.”

Finally he turned to look at you, and you met his glossy stare. He’d been crying, as proven proven by the red and puffy line under his eyes, but now his voice was remained as calm as earlier. “I’m so, so sorry,” he repeated.

“This isn’t your fault, Satoru. How could you have known?” You sniffled. “We tried the best we could.”

“Did we?” You could sense a hint of desperation in his steady voice, evident that he solemnly felt like he was the one to blame. “Didn’t he show us signs?”

Thinking back, there were definitely signs. After everything went down with Riko, Suguru had rapidly been losing weight, the bags under his eyes had gotten more prominent and his hair looked lifeless compared to before. Not to mention his smile. His sweet and precious smile, had disappeared more and more over time.

“He shut us out. You tried to ask him — we both did. He didn’t want our help.” You didn’t even believe your own words, blaming yourself just as much as Satoru did himself. There were so many things you could have done differently, like forcing him to talk to you.

“Guess you’re right,” he answered breathlessly before returning to gaze at the sun again, the golden light illuminating his face. He didn’t believe you either.

“Do you know when I last talked to him? The last time I heard his voice?” Satoru simply shook his head, attention locked in front of him. “Eight days ago. And another nine days before that since I actually saw him.”

Your face scrunched into a grimace thinking of the memory, the tears yet again starting to fall. Instinctively covering your face with both your hands, you pictured his face in your head. You had memorised every single detail of his appearance, forever burned into your mind. And the soothing vibrations of his voice that you missed so dearly.

With a sharp sniffle, you shook your head to regain some stability in yourself before opening your mouth again. “Did he mention me?” You’d dreaded asking the question, but you needed to know. Satoru licked his lips before taking a deep breath to answer you.

“Yeah, he did.” Your eyes widened, not expecting that answer. “He wanted me to tell you-“ Satoru cut himself off, hesitating to finish.

“Satoru,” agony lacing your voice, needing him to complete his sentence.

“He wanted me to tell you he was sorry, and maybe you could find it in your heart to forgive him.”

Silence embraced the two of you as you tried to digest what he’d told you. Time stopped as you had your eyes fixated on your friend, unable to comprehend his words.

“That’s it?” You whispered. His head moved in a careful nod, causing the tears to start falling again, but they’d turned quiet.

“He loved — loves you,” he corrected himself, which earned him an instant scoff from you. One that undoubtedly stemmed from pure hurt.

“Clearly not enough.” Even though you said it mostly to yourself, you felt Satoru’s gaze burn on you, letting you know he heard you. “Both you and Shoko met him and talked to him, while I-“ you had to focus for a second to not let the sobs hinder your words. “Why not me?”

“I think you know,” he sighed as he moved himself to sit on the same same step as you, closing the gab between you as he placed a sympathetic arm around your shoulders to hug you closer.

Satoru was right, you just didn’t admit that to yourself. It was easier to accept a lie that the reasons for avoiding you was because he didn’t love you, and not the other way around.

With another quiet sob, you leaned your head on his shoulder and trying to take some comfort in his hand tenderly stroking up and down your arm. And it worked. For the first time since everything had happened, a tiny feeling of calmness set roots within you. It had been an all too foreign feeling lately, so you were thankful you were able to find it with Satoru.

⋆⭒˚｡⋆

You had tried, to the best of your ability, to accustom to a life without Suguru. It had been anything but easy, living in a constant state of ignorance.

Every single person he had cared for, had gotten some sort of closure in a final conversation with him. While you knew absolutely nothing but the rumours that traveled like a plague through the community, and you never knew if anything that was being spread was even true.

While everyone had something to lean on in order to start moving on, you were stuck on the last time you saw him, where he had lied to you.

Yet again, you had asked if he was okay, genuine concern weighing heavy on you. “I promise you, I’m fine.” He’d said it so calmly, so truthfully, while he had held your face in his big hands and placed a loving kiss on your forehead.

How could you do anything but believe him? When the person you loved and trusted the most in the world, was looking you in the eyes and reassuring you that you had nothing to worry about?

After that interaction, it seemed you missed him by just a few minutes every time. Everyone else; Satoru, Shoko, everyone, met him in small flashes in the period before the massacre, which only made things worse. It was hard to accept you were the only one he was shying away from.

And now, three months had passed since that cursed day. Three long months, where just waking up had become a battle. Because it wasn’t like he had just broken up with you. No, he had gone down an unthinkable path and left you standing in the dust without a word. But you tried your best to just go by your everyday life, going to school and missions, trying to hang out with the friends who hadn’t abandoned you.

But even in your best attempts, you were constantly losing the fight against the ever growing loneliness inside you. More often than not, you found yourself alone doing meaningless activities like walking around empty streets of unfamiliar suburban parts of Tokyo, or taking a random train without purpose from one destination to another just to fill the time.

Like right now, where you we’re patiently waiting for the next train to pull up in front of you. Comparable to so many times before, you’d just sit down on the train and look out the window until it reached its end station.

In the later hours of the afternoon, the wind had gotten significantly colder and you deeply regretted not bringing a thicker jacket. You tried, with little success, to block out the chilly wind that blew quietly through the platforms.

However, your habit of just observing your surroundings served as a nice distraction. Letting your attention travel around you, you took in the intricate architecture, the chirping birds resting on the tall railings, observing the few people scattered about when you spotted a face you knew all too well.

It couldn’t be…

Almost certain your heart would stop at the sight, you pinched your sides trying to wake up from what had to be a dream. Ouch. No, not a dream. Then it had to be your mind playing a cruel trick on you, a hallucination formed because you had such a huge desire to see him again.

Was it actually possible that he was staring back at you from the other platform, mere feet from you? Was it real that you could see the slight tug at the corner of his lips? You didn’t have much time to think as the trance was broken when a train came rushing in in front of him.

Without a second to waste, your feet acted on their own and began to carry you as fast as they possibly could to the opposite platform. Storming down the stairs, paving through the scattered crowd underground before sprinting up the stairs, two steps at a time. Heaving to catch your breath, you stood in the exact spot you swore you had seen him but he was nowhere in sight.

“Please,” you whispered to yourself, running your hands through your hair in despair, frantically looking around you.

Suddenly you froze in place when your eyes landed on him, standing just a few steps away from you. It felt as you’d forgotten how to breathe, looking at the person who once used to stand so close to you, and over night had become a stranger.

He had half of his dark hair tied back in a bun, his usual bangs hanging over his forehead, looking healthier than he did the last time you had seen him. His cheeks weren’t as hollow, the dark circles under his eyes had disappeared and his skin had gotten its colour back.

“Good to see you again, angel.” Crash-landing back to reality at the sound of his nickname for you, without thinking, you leapt for him, throwing your arms around his neck in a tight hug, like you’d be able to prevent him from slipping away again. He barely even stumbled at the impact of your attack, feet still planted safely on the ground as his arms immediately wrapped around your waist in response.

“You’re real! You’re here,” you breathed in awe. You could feel his chest take a deep breath before burying his face in the crook of your neck. The fear of letting go was strong, but it didn’t trump the dire need you had to see his face to know he was actually real. Pulling away, he carefully loosened his grip on you before you grabbed his face without hesitation, staring endearingly at him, taking in the fact that he was indeed standing right in front of you.

There was so many things you wanted to say to him, but your mind was running faster than your mouth, strangling all the questions you had, once another one popped into your mind. Opening and closing your mouth over and over, you stayed quiet, eyes flickering between his.

“Never thought I’d see you again,” he spoke softly. This wasn’t how he had sounded the last few weeks before the tragedy — no, this was the voice of your boyfriend. Your Suguru, not som murderous individual on the run.

“Well, neither did I- I mean, you sort of left me,” you stuttered, feeling your shoulders sink as reality started to wash over you.

“I know.”

Slowly, your hands trailed down his face, his neck, before you let them rest on his chest. Even though he appeared to be so calm, you felt his heart beat against his chest with incredible force, like it was running from something.

“Uhm, where,” you cleared your throat. “Where have you been?”

“In hiding, I suppose. Leading them.” You tried to hide the flinch it caused to hear him say it. Even though he didn’t say it explicitly, it felt like a confession to his crimes.

“And you’re okay?” He nodded slowly, like he genuinely believed his own words but knew you needed further convincing. “You look better.”

Suguru mumbled a small thanks, before he was unable to resist the urge of cupping your cheek, letting his thumb travel back and forth on your cheekbone, capturing some of your soft hair between his hand and your face.

Looking at you now, it felt a lot like the first time he’d met you, looking bewitching as always, despite the fact you looked tired. Even though your features had been tainted with weariness, you still had that special something about you that made him speechless.

What pained him, however, was how he could sense the stress his presence caused you. It was clear as day you were trying your best to suppress the uneasiness you were feeling, but you sadly failed to completely hide the fact that he unnerved you. It made his stomach turn, because he’d never wanted to make you feel anything but safe and loved.

“How are you?” He asked. It was a stupid question, but he couldn’t find any better way to start the conversation after all that had gone down. Watching you closely, he saw you began to nod your head, a little too frantically for his liking, as your fingers began to fidget with the fabric of his shirt.

“As well as I can be,” you didn’t necessarily stutter anymore, but you knew there was a quiver in your voice that he picked up on. “It’s been hard, you know.”

Silence overcame you, as neither could find the right thing to say. No words seemed to be able to bring justice to the messages you wanted to tell the other. Fixating your eyes on your own fingers, still picking at his clothes, you searched your mind for a way to phrase your feelings without breaking down and saying the wrong thing.

Suguru beat you to it, “you must have a hundred questions.”

Carefully tilting your head upwards to meet his eyes again, some of your nerves relaxed out of habit. “Yeah, I do.”

“I’ll answer anything you need me to.”

Once you started to figure out what to ask him, you became insanely aware of your body. Any inch of you that was in contact with him had ignited, like your skin was burning. Suddenly it felt wrong to give him the comfort of your touch after everything he had done.

“It’s all true right?” You swallowed the lump in your throat, slowly pulling away from his embrace and wrapping your jacket tighter around yourself. “What you did in that village?”

“Yes,” he answered simply. He straightened his posture, acting like your recent touch hadn’t had an impact and on him. “Does it scare you?”

You thought about it for a second, holding his gaze captive. You knew what your answer should be, but even though you were uncomfortable with the reality, no part of you were scared of him. You just couldn’t be, having him look at you with those eyes that had always been honest with you and let you know how much he loved you.

“No.” He couldn’t hide it — you saw a small relief travel throughout his body. “Why'd you do it?”

“I’m sure you’ve heard the story.” His demeanour had turned colder after you’d taken a step back, which caused you to find it in you to match his behaviour more.

“I want to hear it from you.”

With a clear of his throat, he found a confident stance. “I no longer believe it is right for Jujutsu sorcerers to serve non-sorcerers, clearly inferior to us.”

“Is that right?” You challenged him, crossing your arms over your chest. You still held his gaze, without a word, denying him the privilege of looking away from you as he tried to justify killing all those people.

“How does it make sense that the weak rule over the powerful? And that without the slightest ounce of appreciation?”

“You don’t think we have a responsibility to protect those who can’t protect themselves?” He just slowly shook his head, more in disbelief than an answer.

“But aren’t you tired?” Not entirely sure what he meant, you squinted at him to elaborate his question. “Doing the same thing over and over, exhausting yourself as you risk your life for people who don’t even care if you live or die?”

“Of course I am. We all are,” you spoke softly, not having it in you to raise your voice at him. “But that doesn’t mean we can just kill people.”

“You weren’t there. They had it coming.” You could hear the words coming from his mouth, but it just didn’t seem like Suguru.

“No, I wasn’t there. And that’s because of you.” Finally you managed to draw out a physical reaction from him as he flinched at your words.

Maybe he had been callow to think you had accepted his departure — that you understood. How could you? He had been unreasonable when he’d decided to just leave without a word or explanation. He knew all that, but at the time he hadn't posessed the strength to face you at that time, knowing he’d be destroying you in the process.

“Why, Suguru?” You’d turned impotent to keeping your emotions in check, the quiver in your voice had shifted into sternness, your tone raising ever so slightly. “Didn’t I deserve any explanation? How come you talked to all the others but me? I tried so desperately to get through to you, but did you care so little about me that you found it easier to just leave me stranded?”

“Is that what you really think?” With big, sad eyes, he stared at you. The confident and strong presence that was visible just seconds ago had transformed into one of innocence, reminding you of the boy you loved.

“Can you blame me?”

“Angel,” there it was again, his nickname for you rolling of his tongue as easy as breathing, making you close your eyes to shut out the tears that had started to form.

You didn’t feel worthy of it anymore, when the sole reason he’d given it to you was because, in his words, you’d saved him. You had come into his life, a light and kind presence that genuinely only wanted the best for him. With just being you, you’d given him the support he needed to go about his life. Whenever he’d needed reassurance or support, he hadn’t hesitated to seek it from you. And you had always given it to him without a single hesitation, no matter how silly the situation might have been.

But this time you’d failed him. When he had needed you the most, you hadn’t been able to help him and he’d crash-landed, destroying everything in his vicinity — literally. You should have been more persistent, forced him to let you help him, been the person he expected you to be.

“I would have been the death of you,” he said weakly. Opening your eyes again to meet his gaze, the first silent tear fell from your eye.

“I’d let you.”

“I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if that was the case.”

“Suguru, I-“ your voice cracked. “You just left me!”

“I know,” cautiously he stepped closer, waiting to see if you’d stop him, before he gently placed his hands on your biceps. “I couldn’t face you.”

Letting your stare flitter across his face, you debated whether you should dig further to get the answers you were seeking. “Would you have asked me to join you.”

“Yes.”

The word left his mouth almost before you’d been able to finish your question. In the time apart, you’d only tortured yourself with what the reason might have been, and always concluded with ‘he doesn’t really care about you’.

But this seemed to be confirming the opposite, what you had refused to believe.

“So I avoided you, knowing I wouldn’t have been able to hold my tongue.” Taking a deep breath before continuing. “It would have been nothing but selfish of me to ask you to come along.”

“But-“

“Would you have said yes?”

Opening your mouth to answer, the words instantly died in your throat, just a hoarse, low squeal escaped you. His intense gaze staring holes into you, seeing right through you. What did you expect? No one knew you better than he did.

You did not want to admit it, but you knew the answer would have been yes, without a shadow of a doubt. Imagining the scene, him capturing your hands in his, begging you with his eyes and you’d say yes. Based on the slightest off chance that it could help him one way or another, you wouldn’t even have hesitated.

“That’s what I thought,” he sighed and stroked your hair. “As much as I believe in this cause, I couldn’t let you go down this path, weighing down on your conscience. You’re too good for this life.”

“So are you!” You uttered in desperation, hot tears falling from your eyes. “You’re good, Suguru. You’re kind, and strong, and brave. This isn’t the life for you.” Scrunching his shirt up in your fists, tugging at him in hopes he would surrender to your plea.

A weak smile painted his features, appearing so innocent. “It is. This is what I believe is right.”

“No, no, that’s not true! You don’t want this, you’re just tired of the same thing every day!” A low sob escaped in between your grovelling. “Just come back with me and we can fix this.”

“Oh, you’re too good for me,” he sighed and leaned forward to rest his forehead against yours, soothing the bouncing of your shoulders. “You know that’s impossible.”

You didn’t let him lean on you for very long, feeling like you had a better chance to convince him if you looked him directly in the eyes. “We’ll convince them! Satoru’s the strongest now, they’ll do as he-“

“Hey,” he sushed you in a respectful manner. “You know they’ll execute me if I am to return.”

“Then why did you come here?!” You snapped at him, as the tears continued to fall. Letting go of his shirt, you pushed him away from you. “If you’re so dead set on this god awful mission, why did you come to see me?”

“Because even when I try not to be selfish, I fail.” Stifling your sobs, your focus was fully dedicated to his explanation. “It would be unfair to you to let that be the last time we spoke.” A silent scoff slipped out, followed by continuous sniffling. “And I miss you,” he trailed off before once again approaching you, sliding his hands up your face, ignoring the tension in you.

“Please come home,” you whispered, even though you knew it was a lost cause.

“You know, you’ve always been the best part of me.”

Letting the tension slip away, you knew you’d regret it if you let this moment be a hostile one. Somewhere inside, you knew this would be the last time you met him on terms like these. If you ever were to cross paths again, you were sure it would end a lot bloodier.

“Continue to be the best part of me, okay angel?” With a reluctant nod, you dried your nose with the back of your hand and rapidly blinking away the tears.

Suguru didn’t say another word, he only leaned forward. You instinctively closed your eyes when you felt his lips place a loving kiss on your forehead.

Then his hands slipped away from your face. You kept your eyes shut for another ten seconds, and when you finally dared to open them, he was gone.

⋆⭒˚｡⋆

tags: @alisstaa (you requested to be tagged in jjk angst, so i just thought, hope thats okay <3)

a/n now i dont like this as much as i wish i did, but ive been heavy in the angsty corner. i started this before the chapter leaks, so i wanted to finish this first. but my poor gojo heart needs something to hold onto after 261 :,) so im already in the process of writing a hefty one i think thankful now that im a maurauders fan so im used to not give a shit about canon. the crazy gojo stan in me needs that rn

reblogs, likes and comments are appreciated

plagiarism not authorized

[badaspebble]

The Way You Dance

Bada Lee x fem!reader

Warnings: 18+ themes, dom!Bada, needy Bada, dry humping, grinding, hair pulling, biting, dirty talk, degrading, praise, teasing, public sex?, almost getting caught

MDNI

—————————

You had the brilliant idea to tease Bada, knowing how worked up she gets. The outfit you wore with purpose caught her attention almost immediately. Bada looked at you confused as you walked into the dance studio, not understanding why you would wear something so revealing when you were likely going to do some…more than suggestive moves for the choreo.

Smirking, you looked at her perplexed expression as you took your bag off and placed it on the bench.

“Ready for today?” You asked, pretending you didn’t notice Bada looking at your exposed legs.

Bada licked her plump lips, her adams apple moving as she swallowed harshly. “Let’s do it…” She trailed off.

You started the music up, playing SWV by Summer Walker. Bada started doing little jumps to warm up, as you looked down and giggled, hoping this would go the way you wanted.

As soon as both of you heard her voice, you started dancing, hitting the moves smoothly but with energy to make them pop.

Dancing individually was hard on you, as you wanted to hurry up and enact your plan. You could tell that Bada was getting worked up already, even though you haven’t done any part of your plan yet.

When Noah joined in after Summer, that’s when you both started dancing together. Bada’s hands grabbed your waist, her long fingers digging into your skin. You smiled as Bada put her mouth right next to your ear, letting you know how heavy she’s breathing.

Bada was borderline panting as you continued to dance, her hot breath hitting the inside of your ear as she makes your hips grind into her own. Her eyes locking onto yours through the mirror, realizing how flushed you both are.

You grind your hips back into her continuously, as you move your arms to the beat. After a particular beat, your right hand lands in her hair. You bite your bottom lip as you dig your hand into it and tug.

Bada whines shamelessly as she digs her mouth into your neck, not yet kissing as she prefers to rub her lips against you instead. Her breathing gets heavier and her teeth start grazing your pulse point.

You start breathing heavier too, spinning out of her arms and starting to dance individually again. You can hear Bada whine and complain as she watched you dance. You giggled and looked at Bada teasingly as you both start doing moves on the floor. Bada stares at you as you spread your legs teasingly, before arching your back.

Bada’s eyes lit up as the song ends. She rushes towards your phone and makes sure some other songs are played, ones that you haven’t choreographed yet.

Bada walks up to you fast, smirking as she brings her hands around your waist before spinning you around so you’re both facing the mirror.

“Do you think I wouldn’t know what you’re doing? Hm?” Bada rushes out against your neck, biting it and leaving marks.

“You’re so fucking naive…thinking you can tease me without consequences.” She whispers against your now bruised neck, trailing her puffy lips upwards until she’s talking into the shell of your ear.

You only smile, thinking of something bratty to say back. “Maybe you’re the naive one? Maybe I wanted this to happen..” You say as you bite your bottom lip, bringing your hands to grab at both her wrists as her nails dig into you painfully.

Bada inhales harshly, dragging you closer to her. She drags one hand to your head, pulling your hair until she gets more access to your neck. “You’re such a fucking whore, you know that baby? You get all bratty when my fingers aren’t inside of you.” Bada says in between her kisses on your jawline. The hand that was holding your hair makes it’s way to your chin, holding it.

“Keep looking at the mirror, okay baby? Since you can’t do anything else with that dumb little head of yours, I wanna make you see yourself become my little slut again.”

You gulp at her words and her grip, loving the feeling of her hands all over you, no matter how rough they are.

Bada grabs your cunt through your skirt, not even lifting it up. She puts her leg in between yours from behind before pushing you onto it. Her other hand still grips your chin as to make sure you don’t look away.

You hold back a subtle whine as her hand is still pressing into your cunt while she makes you grind on her leg.

Bada licks her lips as she starts nibbling on your lobe. “Let me hear you, pretty thing. Wanna hear how good I make you feel.” Bada basically whines out, desperate to hear you.

You still bite your lip to mask your sounds, not wanting anybody to see you in this state. Bada is the opposite, as she loves the adrenaline of almost being caught. With that idea in mind, Bada’s hand leaves your chin and instead slithers up your crop top, playing with your nipples through your bra.

“B-bada….please baby! ‘S too much…” You manage to whine out as she makes you grind onto her leg harder. You looked at yourself through the mirror, seeing the trail of wetness on Bada’s sweats. It makes you moan shamelessly through your closed lips, secretly loving how close you are already.

“You can take it baby. You were the one walking around like this, weren’t you? You wanted me to ruin you, hm? Look at the mess you’re leaving on me, slut.” Bada says harshly into your ear. Her own voice husky with lust. She audibly gulps as she looks at you in the mirror, looking so lost as she pinches your nipple.

“All mine…you’re all mine to fuck. God, I love it when you’re my little whore” Bada mumbles out, borderline whining. She starts biting everywhere she can see skin, your ear, your jaw, your neck, even your shoulder.

Your eyes turn glossy feeling your lower stomach get hot, as well as your cunt. The pressure becoming too much to ignore. It doesn’t help that you can feel her subtle moans and whines as she bites into you, leaving you with marks.

“Bada-“ You moan out, realizing you’re close. “Baby slow down—“ You whine loudly, the squelching of your cunt as it grinds onto her covered thigh, paired with your whines echoing in the empty studio made you both breathless. You then blink your eyes rapidly as you see Bada through the mirror, biting her lip so hard it starts to bleed. Her eyes are just as glossy as yours while she gasps and swallows harshly.

“I fucking love seeing you like this. Makes me feel so good baby, your sounds are so pretty. Do you make these noises for anybody else? Hm? No? You belong to me, baby? My personal little slut.” Bada moans and stutters into your ear as she pinches your other nipple, twisting it and making sure it hurts. You moan at the stinging sensation, getting closer to the edge.

“Answer me, whore. You gonna cum already, huh? I haven’t even touched your little clit yet..” Bada pouts, pretending to be saddened by the fact. She smirks into your neck as you still don’t answer her, mumbling incoherently. Bada suddenly perks up as she starts hearing footsteps. She bites her lip and holds in a giggle as she makes you grind faster. The sound your cunt makes against her sweats is loud and wet, making sure everybody knows how needy you are for her.

“B-bada…need to-“ You interrupt yourself with a loud moan, not yet hearing footsteps. “Please… ‘m gonna come—“ You whine out as you slump against her, and squeezing your eyes shut.

“Need you to come for me so bad, pretty girl.” Bada lowers the both of you to the ground before making you sit on her thigh. She makes you open your legs wide as she starts to rub you through your panties. “Wish I could tease you but we don’t have time for that.” Bada whines as she hears the footsteps again, this time closer. “Please baby, need you to make a mess on me, okay?” She rubs you faster, focusing on your clit as you still manage to make a mess on her fingers, even through your panties.

“O-oh fuck….fuck fuck fuck Bada— gonna come..please” You whine out, finding the energy to grind on her fingers a little. The pressure in your lower stomach becomes too much, the band holding you back suddenly snapping as your eyes open wide, locking with hers in the mirror. Bada suddenly puts a couple of her fingers in your mouth as you scream out. Your eyes water as you gag on some her fingers and cum on the rest from her other hand. Bada moans with you, eyes rolling back as she nuzzles into your neck.

Once you both calm down, Bada chuckles as she removes her fingers from your mouth, pushing your hair out of the way. She notices you're still too dazed to focus on the footsteps, so she removes her other hand from your cunt and takes off her jacket. She props you up against the mirror and wraps her jacket around you, wiping her hands on a nearby towel before rushing towards the door.

Just as Bada made it to the door, the person knocked. Bada fixed herself before opening the door. “Hey Tatter! Did you need something?” Bada said, smirking as Tatter talks about something, oblivious to the trail on Bada’s sweats, or the heated up room. Bada swallows as her own cunt remains sticky with her wetness, not wanting to risk her pride by telling you she came from just your sounds.

[cheriladycl01]

In your Dreams - Lewis Hamilton x FrenchOlympicBadminton! Reader

Plot: Lewis loves Golfing, Surfing and Skiing, so you’d think if he’d end up with an athlete he’d end up with one in one of his secondary sports. But no, hes with you on the red carpet of the debut of a movie airing about your life and your struggles before becoming the youngest Olympic Gold Medalist in Badminton, and having the most consecutive medals too.

Warning: lots of dark themes and undertones about your backstory in this one’s, specifically abuse in the system, parental pressures, grooming and SA (by an ex partner) etc

Credit to yuzuchupachups for the GIF

You walked along the red carpet outside the Leicester Square cinema where the exclusive showing of your new movie was occurring.

Lewis couldn’t keep his eyes off of you in that pretty red dress he loved. The moment he saw you in it, his brain had pretty much short-circuited and his only thoughts were off you.

He knew in the red carpet photos you’d be there radiant as ever and he’d be looking at you like some love sick puppy. But he really didn’t care, this was your night and he was here to support you … his fiancé.

“Thank you for being here tonight. I know it wasn’t easy to get time away” you smile up at him, holding him close to you and looking at him with an adoration he saw often. You knew he was busy with the season as it hadn’t started off as Mercedes Gad expected and he was under a lot of pressure from Toto that he’d been feeling overwhelmed most days.

“You know I’d do just about anything for you my Cherie” he said using the nickname you loved.

“I needed you here tonight” you smile pulling him into a kiss, the camera flashes instantly picking up speed and consistency making you giggle into the kiss.

“I know darling” he says keeping his hold on your waist tight as you walk past the photographers and paparazzi posing every now and then when they ask you to stop.

You eventually get to the people interviewing you, happier to be in a calmer than the one at the start of the carpet.

“Y/N it’s amazing to have you here tonight on the premier. Feeling right now?” She asks and a grin comes into your face.

“Amazing, honestly to have my personal story but out in such a raw and public way is such a helpful step for people who maybe or may have suffered the way I have an gives a message of hope to anyone who has ever felt the way I did that the road doesn’t end there!” You nod loving that you will be helping millions of people who have shared the same experience as you.

“So before we go in, tell us a little about the film!” She probes.

“Well, it’s starts on the note of me growing up pretty tough and with no outlook for my future, being tossed from foster to foster home, the hard times and abuse I went through there before I come across Patrick DuPont, who we know very well as my trainer and the main reason I ended up where I am today. It moves through my teens and realising I’m talented and some things and how I was naive enough to not see the manipulation and abuse I was put through as a result of that and how I was used by many. It guides you through my most important relationships with people both the most gnarly and the most pure. It’s a really moving and emotional movie that I know will being lots of people including myself to tears” you explain the rough synopsis to her, making her nod and check her pad in-front of her that an assistant was holding out for her.

“And obviously adding onto those relationships, who will we be seeing a lot of?” She asks and you nod.

“Obviously towards the start in my early childhood, you’ll see a lot of my foster parents and my childhood best friend Emilie Bustlen, as I grow up you meet Patrick and my main foster family. For legal reasons we had to change names around because of this so they are know as the Laurent’s before we meet Hunter Goshill, my ex partner and some of my competitors. Before we finally find a safe haven, in this man right here beside me” you smile pulling Lewis forward and closer to you, he looks a little shocked that he’s now in the full shot of the camera rather than off the the side and has a mic code to him.

“You guys met when Y/N was 19 and you must have been what 25, 26? How did that work in 2011?” She asks knowing that’s when you met.

“Obviously I met Y/N at a race, she was there alone walking through the paddock and I just fell in love with her. Once I worked out who she was having an Olympic gold medal I was introduced to her by my then team principle Martin Whitmarsh and I proceeded to win that race. Was Germany! Obviously the year after she was travelling to London for the Olympics and as my home country of course I came with her as it tied in nicely to my summer break. After that she was the one that convinced me to make the move to Mercedes and apart from proposing to Y/N that’s probably the best thing I’ve ever done” he admits.

“Woah, what a lovers story obviously prior to that, Y/N you were in a if you don’t mind me saying quite a pressured and dare I say toxic relationship with ex partner Hunter?” She asks and you nod looking down for a second before feeling a squeeze on your hand in reassurance.

“I mean it shows it better in the film that I can get into words, but I was very young and naive. I looked for anything that would give me the slightest bit of affection which I would often just confuse with attention. And of course that came from someone who was older than me, and knew how to take advantage of me, without it ever feeling like he had I’ll intentions because I was so desperate to feel. Lewis has thought me many things but being loved the right way is the best thing” you smile looking to your soon to be husband with pure love, no other intentions just two souls mingled together as they should be.

“Really a beautiful couple and a beautiful story, just is heartwarming finding out what you’ve been through and how Lewis has helped break those walls you spent years building. I’m so excited to see this movie, and everyone at home watching this is your sign to get to your local cinema and buy a ticket for In your Dreams: The Story of Y/N Y/L/N ” she smiles.

You nod beofre saying a polite goodbye and heading off.

You answer some more questions, some about the movie some about your goals for 2024 in Paris if you’ll get your 5th gold medal for Team France, some were as trivial as what and who you were wearing.

“God, I just want to go home to Roscoe now” you sigh as you enter the theatre, going to get some treats for you and Lewis while the movie is on.

“I know baby, just a little longer. Then we can get started on our wedding planning hmmm?” He asks looking over you and making you smile and pull him into a passionate kiss, teeth clashing and you pulling him in by the nape of his neck.

You walk past some critics giving them smiles and some small talk before they let you on your way.

You eventually sat with Lewis at the front row will all the cast and directors next to your guys as the film came up on the screen.

It was everything you’d envisioned. Tear jerking, heartwarming and moving. Lewis was brought to tears and many others in the theatre who didn’t know the full extent of your story were coming up to you after the film talking to you about your life and how your success had a whole new meaning to them now.

y/user

Liked by lewishamilton, nicorosberg and antonia.desplat

y/user: I’ve loved you since I was 19, now that I’m 32 and engaged to you, I wouldn’t want my life any other way. I love you Lew ♥️.

Thank you so much for paramountpictures making my story come to life in the new movie In your Dreams: The Story of Y/N Y/L/N

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paramountpictures: truly amazing to bring your story of strength, resilience and success to life.

-> y/user: thank you for putting your heart and souls into this project it really is magical 💥 Also thank you too, all of the actors and actresses in the movie antonia.desplat who did a fantastic job!

-> antonia.desplat: thank you for giving me this opportunity. This movie has been my big break as a struggling French actress! Merci Du Fond Du Coeur 🇫🇷♥️🥐

lewishamilton: I love you with all of my heart. I’m so proud of everything you’ve achieved this far and am proud to say I’ll be in your life for the remainder of your future successes and achievements. Je vous aime! 🐻❤️

-> y/user: Sir Lewis Hamilton - the man you are 🫶🏼

nicorosberg: that picture is so old, I took this years and years ago!

-> y/user: Nico Rosberg the OG Y/N-Hamilton shipper 🫶🏼

Instagram Story Caption:

Back on the grind 😮‍💨

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