#you can see how there's a platonic interpretation?
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scintillatingshortgirl19 · 2 years ago
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i just have one question which is
what in the actual motherfucking HELL
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hauntingjasper · 3 months ago
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Chuuiickensnek (+headcanon design for Vinny)
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liorlenn · 3 months ago
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(Spoilers for KCD2 romance)
One thing that really surprised me about Kingdom Come: Deliverance II (particularly the Hansry romance) was the direct reference to Galehaut and Lancelot (let me tell you I CHEERED), so I wanted to start talking about some other queer medieval Arthurian texts and Arthuriana adjacent texts.
I’m by no means an expert (I focus more on Welsh poetry and prose) but medieval Welsh literature includes some Arthurian literature, so I know a little about Arthurian Literature in general. Most of these stories are either Old French or German and about 13th century. SGATGK is 14th century.
For one, I want to say that the tale being referenced in the game is the Vulgate Cycle or the Lancelot-Grail Cycle (the Vulgate Cycle itself is multiple parts, with Lancelot’s (The Story of Lancelot/Prose Lancelot) being the largest). It’s a big ol’ mash up and retelling of a huge part of the early tradition + new stuff. There’s also the Post-Vulgate which is itself a retelling of the Vulgate Cycle. This is NOT the one you want if you’re looking for Lancelot and Galehaut.
Another thing of note about the Vulgate is that Galehaut and Lancelot are not the only ones I would give the old side eye. Gawain says (about Lancelot even!), “If God were to grant me my health… I’d immediately wish to be the most beautiful maiden in the world, happy and healthy, on condition that he would love me above all others…” Come on man.
Now, for other queer texts!
First up, I have to plug my best friend and my silly rabbit: Sir Gawain and the Green Knight. Thanks to the movie (which was good but fairly different) this one is a bit more well-known. I could talk endlessly about the moral of the original story and I think the Gawain Poet is incredibly talented at weaving together imagery. I also appreciate Gawain’s willingness to kiss women AND men. Some argue that it’s not queer because of differing social norms but personally I think Gawain wanted it. And by it, haha well let’s jusrt say—
Next we have Parzival/Percival (referencing the German “version” by Wolfram von Eschenbach here. Each iteration of a “Percival”, including Chrétien de Troyes’ earlier (and unfinished) Story of the Grail, all have their own differences). This one is even more up to interpretation than SGATGK. There’s a very explicitly performative aspect to Parzival’s presentation (his gender is “knight”), focusing distinctly on clothing and the role clothing plays in others’ reactions to him that I think is very relatable. I don’t have much else to say about this one unfortunately. I read parts of it once years ago but it was super interesting and there has been scholarship done on Parzival and gender so…. take what you will from it.
The next stories are Arthurian adjacent (as in, medieval stories about knights). First off: Le Roman de Silence is either about a woman knight or a trans knight who is… sighs. Forcibly outed. Interesting read but definitely a bit of a downer if you interpret Silence as a trans man.
Yde et Olive, however is very explicitly about a trans man! Happy ending too! I was incredibly surprised to read a 13th century story about a trans man getting magical/miraculous top and bottom surgery (yes, forreal).
And to cap off this small list, here is some medieval Welsh literature. This one is just me being a little wistful, but let me tell you about Blodeuedd/Blodeuwedd and the Fourth Branch of the Mabinogi (Math fab Mathonwy). This one is…sad. It’s not a good ending for Blodeuedd, but I could wax poetic about her: how she was fashioned from flowers to fulfill a gendered role. How she failed to do so and was punished.
There are plenty of other stories with queer interpretations in Arthuriana and other medieval literature (do not get me started on Guinevere and Morgan le Fay’s whole… thing. Also Luned and her Lady…) and there are plenty of modern/early modern retellings that are explicitly queer. I just wanted to stick to medieval texts for this and also limit myself to a select few among that even.
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the-moon-ate-my-stardust · 10 months ago
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Okay literally no one asked but as a former Hobbit movie hater who has since experienced character growth, I feel compelled to share my thoughts on the movies on my gay little blog.
Listen. There are legit reasons to be critical of these movies. They were made on a rushed timeline, at time where CGI overuse was the thing and there are definitely unnecessary moments. But despite those issues, these movies still have a lot of heart and character and some really wonderful acting! To compare them to LOTR, is unfair I think because LOTR was such an unimaginable success and I truly believe no other movie franchise can do what those movies did. To expect the Hobbit movies to be the same caliber considering the behind the scenes drama and massive difference in timeline is just not it.
Truly I think that the Hobbit could have been much more than it was and it’s sad to see the amazing moments and realize that we could have had movies that were maybe closer to the level of LOTR, but that doesn’t take away from all of the great things that the movies gave us! Despite what he may be like irl, Martin Freeman was a great young Bilbo, Richard Armitage was insanely good as Thorin (despite the change in age) and the other dwarf actors brought a great sense of loyalty, brotherhood and shared loss to their roles. The music is still dope as hell and there are some beautiful shots despite all the CGI.
This is way too long and I’ve not said anything that hasn’t been said before but honestly, I’m so glad that I stopped hating on these movies and have seen the special things about them. Nothing will ever compare to LOTR, but that doesn’t make these movies bad. They’re fun, they’re emotional, they have great characterization and it’s super valid to enjoy them.
Final gay thoughts because I’m obligated, but I struggle with people who argue against Bagginshield with the whole “why does everyone have to make everything gay?” thing. Because Hollywood is so deeply homophobic that we see so little genuine queer representation, so forgive us for enjoying the chemistry we find and making it our own since our society gives us breadcrumbs. If you’re not into Bagginshield, totally legit and fine, but don’t hate on other people (especially queer people) trying to find some romantic love in media that we enjoy. Also no one can convince me that Richard Armitage wasn’t at least somewhat intentionally putting his queer energy into this role, I will die on this hill.
Anyway, TL;DR there’s no shame in liking or loving the Hobbit movies despite their faults and there are lots of things to appreciate and enjoy and I for one, am glad to leave my LOTR purist hater days behind me
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pianokantzart · 1 year ago
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Princess Daisy's capabilities as a ruler being disregarded because she's loud, hotheaded and emotional, leading her to be perceived by many as immature and impulsive.
Luigi's capabilities as a hero being disregarded because he's awkward, nervous and emotional, leading him to be perceived by many as weak and pathetic.
Both of them recognizing the value inherent in each other's feelings while simultaneously seeing the strength and potential in one another that they are unable to see in themselves. Do you feel me?
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lollytea · 2 years ago
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I don't think Willow and Hunter start dating immediately after the events of W&D. They know they're something and they're both open to exploring that when they're ready. But they also agree that it would be in their best interest to adjust to their new normal and do some soul searching before they make themselves an official item. They don't consider themselves dating but they don't consider themselves single either. And the way the two of them approach their feelings for each other in this murky limbo state is vastly different for both of them.
Like if somebody asks Willow if she's in love with Hunter, it's like
Willow: Am I in-...? Well, it's...complicated. It's a very complicated situation we're in and I don't want to make any bold decisions right away. Do I love him as a friend? Of course I do. Am I physically attracted to him? Yes, but hormones don't mean love. Am I also emotionally attracted to him? Yes, but a crush isn't love. Do all of these things at once equate to being in love? Well, that seems like the kind of question that would keep a very nervous very scared person lying awake all night. Good thing that's not me, haha. It's not like I'm scared to be in love and I'm subconsciously avoiding confronting the fact that I am. I just believe in staying rational and analyzing your emotions so you don't get too reckless and dive into things without thinking. You'll hurt yourself. I've heard that's it's really easy to hurt yourself when you're in love. You see it's...we...Hunter and I met at a really crazy time, when I was just starting to become the witch I want to be. And then everything got so much crazier and we were confused and scared and it was hard to think about who you wanted to be when you weren't where you wanted to be. So now we're home. And finally, we have the chance to figure ourselves out. And that's exactly what we're gonna do. I want to be with him...eventually. When we're ready. I like him and I want to kiss him but I'm not in love with him. I'm totally not.
Meanwhile, on the other side of Bonesborough
Del: Willow seems like a nice girl.
Hunter: Yeah. I'm in love with her.
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took-my-breath-away · 8 months ago
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what relationship from tg/tgm is ur roman empire and why? talk as much as u want i will GLADLY read an essay
SORRY OP YOU ASKED FOR AN ESSAY AND AN ESSAY YOU WILL RECIEVE ....
contrary to what's popular, it’s not icemav... not even close. (please don’t crucify me for this, i promise this is a genuine take and not hate toward the ship!) ice and mav’s dynamic is interesting and we cannot deny the gay subtext—ice is crucial to mav’s character growth, especially in tg86. but in terms of central relationships that drive the heart of the story and mav's character arc? it’s goose and mav, and later, roo and mav, that define both films on a deeper, more emotional level.
bear with me...
mav and goose set the foundation for everything in tg. their bond is the emotional core of the first film—goose is mav's conscience, his anchor. he’s not just a best friend; he’s family. this relationship is central to understanding why goose's death is such a devastating turning point for mav. it’s not just about losing a wingman; it’s about losing a brother, someone who believed in him AND forgave him unconditionally. this loss haunts mav throughout the rest of the movie and even more so in tgm. goose’s death becomes the source of all of mav’s guilt, hesitation, and self-doubt.
fast forward to tgm, and we see how this guilt spills over into his relationship with rooster. mav is torn between wanting to protect goose's son and letting him chart his own path. this tension forms the backbone of tgm's story. roo embodies all of mav's unresolved feelings about goose—the guilt, the sense of responsibility, and ultimately, the need for redemption. it’s this father/son dynamic, not a romantic or rivalry-based connection, that truly drives mav’s emotional arc in both films. the burden he feels for goose’s death is unresolved until he finds some semblance of reconciliation with rooster. the act of trusting rooster and allowing him to 'fly on his own' represents mav’s emotional catharsis atp
the weight of this connection makes it, in my view, the pillar of both films. mav’s growth is tied to his relationships with goose. ice certainly plays a key role in mav's journey—his respect for ice grows over time, and their friendship is a touching subplot—but it’s not the emotional center of the narrative. the top gun series is ultimately about legacy, guilt, and redemption, and in my hUMBLE opinion, those themes are carried by goose and rooster above all. mav’s motivation, his guilt, his need for absolution—all stem from these two relationships.
it’s goose and roo that are at the heart of it all and ILL DIE ON THIS HILL
(if, OP, you actually meant romantic relationship, then I AM SORRYVJAHAHAH (but it's still not icemav...kekeke))
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quietwingsinthesky · 1 year ago
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sometimes interpreting media through a shipping lens enhances it, on occasion even beyond the author’s original intent, but sometimes, you do have to accept that your ship was not in the heads of anyone making the source material and trying to force it to fit into evidence of your ship will severely hinder your ability to discuss the actual text.
#and also ill hit you on the head with a brick#posts that. im not going to say theyre about destiel. im not going to say that.#and im not gojng to say it because. i dont need to. you already know <3#and to be clear: its not the interpretation thats a problem here. thats the fun of shipping. its then taking what youve interpreted and then#trying to backread that onto the media itself as intentional. as intended.#dismissing the actual themes and story for evidence of a ship is the problem. u get me?#shipping brainrot is not ‘oh i think these characters would kiss for this reason’.#its ‘this show is and has always been about these characters kissing no matter how much i have to ignore about the show to make that true or#pretend is completely different than its actually presented or straight up make things up to make my ship be a part of the intended reading’#thats the brainrot. the brainrot is when u step off the train of reality.#this is not true about the best piece of art ever made Captain America and the Winter Soldier. btw. that movie IS about bucky and steve#kissing alsjfdjskdjg#(<- okay im being silly here but id like to make a real point here too. the thing about TWS is that. it is genuinely enhanced by a romantic#reading. its not *better* than a platonic one. its just different. being able to see it through that lens does make a lot of the original#movie’s ideas even more complex. case in point like: steve struggling with his dating life. because what shared life experience does he have#with other people who look his age. and the movie is. about. someone who has his shared life experiences. and his mission to get bucky back.#you can see how that lens would be beneficial to the original movie rather than fighting it to prove the ship works in opposition to the#author’s original intent.)
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lemonwarrior · 1 month ago
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I very much am someone who doesn't go with the "There is no platonic explanation for this," line of thought, because well, no, yes there is I'm just choosing to see this as gay
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rinmemesuoka · 1 month ago
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i loved the part of the last mc+ when sylvia and keith were like "okay but it is a romantic relationship" i felt validated in some of my mean little thoughts
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music-orthemisery · 1 year ago
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Listened to Saturday Night Again a few times on the way to work today (like an insane person) and it really has me thinking about p2/hiatus…
As much as they (and, sometimes, we) want to retcon shit, hiatus was really, really bad for p2/Patrick.
Imagine meeting your soulmate when you’re a young adult, and your soulmate-ism allows you to create musical magic.
Said musical magic catapults you into fame - a life that you never even imagined. Suddenly, you’re EVERYWHERE. Shuffled constantly from thing to thing, no breaks, no time to grow, media and fans constantly in your business and picking you apart.
In the face of this, said soulmate tries to protect you. Trying to keep you unscathed from this meat grinder, he ends up getting chewed up and spit out and fucked up, made even worse by his own underlying and unresolved issues.
You also have your own undiagnosed mental health issues and lack of healthy coping skills. So, obviously, this all ends up negatively impacting you, your sense of self, your identity, and your actions.
Neither of you are wrong or malicious or bad people. You genuinely love each other, but sometimes life makes love painful and unhealthy.
Toxicity and co-dependency can sneak its way into any genuinely good relationship. Painting either as the “villain” takes away from both their humanity and growth as people. In the grand walk of life, there are rarely villains - just people marching along and trying to navigate the challenges they are dealt. You’re bound to get lost sometimes, but, if you’re willing, you can always find your way back to the road.
That’s why that time apart was absolute shit, but the best thing for them. It gave them the opportunity to stand on their own and experience the growth necessary to be better people.
Then, ultimately, CHOOSE to stand together again because they realized that made them feel happiest and most complete.
Regardless of how you see their relationship, I think anyone can see how rare and beautiful this is. What many would have left shattered, they took and rebuilt even stronger than before. That’s NOT typical. It’s genuinely incredible and, damn, are we lucky to witness it.
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thatkoiboi · 9 months ago
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It has been a year since I posted this and I thought I would finally explain my thought process behind making this.
It is fun to think that the Disaster Twins have this sort of "twin sense" that can even follow them into dreams. Hense them finding each other in this sort of Dreamscape.
Lucid dreaming can be kind of interesting. You are aware that you are dreaming, but you watch how events unfold in a sort of surreal experience where it still feels real, even if you can kind of control the outcome/your own actions. That is kind of what Leo and Donnie experience when they enter this Dreamscape. They are kind of aware that it is a dream, but allow the events to play on.
The only thing is they didn't know that they were sharing a dream until Donnie initiates the story in their teen years.
As Turtle Tots, all the brothers love each other, but I feel like Leo and Donnie had that sibling rivalry even when they were younger. They fought a lot, and teased each other, but they are kids. They don't have the mental capacity to really explain what they are feeling to a full extent (especially for Donnie but this logic applies to most kids). So sometimes they may go to bed after a day of arguing, and because they don't know how to express their feelings, they go to sleep feeling a sense of unresolve. They still love each other, and they don't want to actually hurt each other, but they don't have the communication skills and their emotions are so big. How do you even identify all of those feelings enough to think rationally?
So they go to bed. And when they enter the Dreamscape, they think it is a dream. They don't know they are sharing a dream. So they are able to just... talk.
And talk.
And be at peace.
Despite not remembering what the other says when they wake up.
But there is one thing that rings clear once said that they will never forget: "You are important to me."
And that is a comforting thought, indeed.
Now the difference between Donnie and Leo, is that Donnie can believe it.
So why is it blurry when Donnie says it to Leo?
Leo has issues with self worth. We see him struggle with it throughout the series, and especially in the movie. But he still hears Donnie. And even if he may not believe it for himself, he still remembers. He trusts Donnie, even if he may not trust himself.
They always have each other at the end of all things, and that's what is important.
//hi hi. just before we embark on this journey, there is a song that just adds a whole new element when i read the comic while listening. it's called "Je te laisserai des mots" by Patrick Watson, if you want! i put links at the bottom of the post O_o//
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Same phrase, different contextual meaning... nothing but LOVE
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tobeholyistobeempty · 3 months ago
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‘you’ll get used to it.’ | captain john price
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“Good girl,” he mutters, voice thick with it, and your cunt clenches around him in response. “God, you take me so—” you whimper, rolling your hips to meet his, and he hisses. “Yeah,” his mouth finds your ear. “Show me what you can give me—”
WARNINGS - 18+ mdni. smut. so much smut. darker themes ie death. a super deep and twisted interpretation of a solider who’s being reckless in attempt to run from their feelings. captain price is bred to hunt so it’s futile. piv. mirror sex. multi orgasms. size kink. dirty talk. dubcon slightly. we shouldn’t be doing this trope. slightly morally grey. a lot of sleep token references. fingering. reader afab. mentions of blood, injury. slight brat/dom dynamic. overstimulation.
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The first thing you register is the weight of him.
Not his hands, though they’re there too — firm around your arms, holding you steady — but him. The heat of him at your side, sweat and cigarettes filling your muddled senses with each laboured breath you gasp for. The quiet, infernal energy that pours off him, taking up too much space, too much air from your already airless lungs.
“You with me?” His voice rumbles close to your ear.
You try to nod, but the motion sends a fresh bolt of pain ricocheting through your skull. Your breath hitches, and his grip tightens.
“Easy.” A low murmur, meant to soothe. “Almost there.”
There being the med bay, where fluorescent lights paint everything sterile. Too bright, too fucking loud alongside the offset drumbeat in your ears. He doesn’t let you sit on your own — eases you down onto the cot himself, hands as steady as they always are, even when yours are the furthest from.
You wince as you shift, and his eyes flick over you. He’s still assessing.
“Shouldn’t’ve let that bastard get a hit in,” he mutters, half to himself.
You know what he’s thinking. The result of your own impulsivity. Reckless. “Yeah, I’ll try to avoid that next time.”
He exhales sharply. A shake of his head. “Could’ve been worse.”
You know that. Just like you know he’s only saying it to ease your dread. But you can see it in the way he looks at you, something unreadable tightening at the corners of his mouth, that he’s seen it. Many more times than you think.
“I’m fine,” you tell him. “You don’t have to—”
He doesn’t let you finish.
Just gives you that look, the one that shuts people up without him having to say a damn thing. It’s something you’re still learning about him — the way he often communicates without words. How his silence and pointed stares hold more meaning than most people’s shouting. You’ve also learned the effort to argue with him when he’s like this is a futile one. You’re a part of his team. He’ll be with you through it all.
Then, without asking, he reaches for you — because he knows you’ll let him. One hand bracing your chin, tilting your head so he can get a better look at the damage.
And even through the agony, it’s all too much.
The touch, the closeness, the way he hasn’t taken his eyes off you for one goddamn second since you’d been hit. Your throat goes dry at the realization that it’s doing more to you than it should. But you’ll never get used to how he does it. How a man like him — a wartime killer with more bloodshed on his fingertips than skin covering his limbs — can still look at you with something even remotely soft, when he’s bred to be everything but.
“You always this stubborn?” His voice is quieter now. A rough rasp against his throat.
You swallow, pulse hammering. “You always this persistent?”
His lips quirk, but his grip stays firm, fingers cool against your fevered skin.
“You’ll get used to it.”
You wondered then, if you ever really would.
———————
Months later, you’re still wondering the same thing.
It’s been months since that night in the med bay. Months of keeping yourself at arm’s length. Of keeping things professional. Of projecting platonic renditions despite the cursed thing threatening to take its place.
Or, well, trying to.
Because if there’s one thing you know for certain, it’s that tension like this doesn’t fade. It festers.
No matter how deep you try to bury it, perseverance is its ally. Helps it crawl out of the grave you dug for it in every brush of his fingers against yours when he hands over a magazine clip, every order spoken gravel in your ear, every glance held a second too long when neither of you are fast enough to look away. It leaves claw marks in everything, has been ever since the day he carried you through crumbling stone and mortar — ever since you felt him so fucking close and you realized you didn’t mind it. Since the moment you learned more about him in twenty minutes than you have in the entire year by his side.
That night relinquished something. Made you see him in a new light. What was once a beacon is now a solar flare for dead gods.
And it erupts here. Now.
In the barracks washroom after a mission gone sideways. After a fight that took too much out of you — left your bones aching, your skull pounding with the remnants of a concussion you’re beginning to suspect never fully healed — skin still humming raw, soaked in adrenaline and something a little too fucking reckless.
After he follows you in.
The door slams behind him, the sound ricocheting off the tiles. You don’t turn around, just strip your tac vest off with more force than necessary, breathing hard, hissing under your breath as exhaustion begins smothering out the fire in your blood.
“You got a fucking death wish?”
You can feel him staring at you. You know he’s seeing red — the heat of his eyes on your back incomparable to the even the greediest hellfires.
You exhale, press your palms flat against the edge of the sink. “Don’t start.”
“Don’t start?” He steps closer. “You ran straight into that firefight without cover.”
“I handled it.”
“You barely walked away.”
Finally, you turn, glare at him over your shoulder. “That what this is? Another fucking lecture?”
He doesn’t scowl. Doesn’t snap at you like your previous COs would. He just watches. And somehow, that’s worse.
“That what you think I’m doing?”
You scoff, shake your head, turning back toward the sink. The mirror in front of you is cracked down the middle, splitting your reflection in two. And you think, rather ridiculously, that it’s a perfect fucking picture of how you feel. Torn. Between the persistence of him and the need to keep your distance. Between what you’ve spent months trying to ignore and the way it still catches you off guard—how you keep finding yourself watching him, noticing him, like something inside you has already made a decision you can’t retract.
Behind you, he exhales slow. You hear the shift of his boots against the floor.
“Can’t keep doing this,” he mutters. “Won’t.”
Something in your chest tightens.
“What, watching my back?” You force your voice to stay even. “That’s your job, isn’t it?”
“Not like this.”
The simplicity of that response has currency, and you know the behaviour. The familiar silence that tells you there’s more to this. Syllables pleading behind his teeth which he isn’t quite yet dignifying — but that slice along the back of his throat all the same. You meet his gaze in the mirror, and you see it then. In the dim light of his ocean eyes.
An emergence.
“I can’t watch you go down again.” There it is. Words coaxed out in that thick accent of his that inflicts them like a wound. He’s moving closer now, extinguishing the space. Stepping up behind you. “You haven’t been right for months. I need to know why.”
At that, you almost recoil — each syllable thrusting the knife deeper into your resolve, and you realize it’s not his accent that makes them cut, but the way he speaks them. Certain. As if he’s looking at you bare. No layers left to protect you. Like you’re nothing but sinew and marrow. Like your eyes and limbs are instruments to pick apart.
You stare at the sink. “So you are always this persistent.”
It leaves your lips exactly as you mean it — a callback, a test. You don’t watch his face, but the silence stretching long tells you it landed exactly where you wanted. A synapse snap back, an echo from the depths of whatever is eating you from the inside out.
“And you,” a pause, breath ghosting against the shell of your ear. “Are always this stubborn.”
He says it like an indictment.
You’re sure it’s because he knows you. Because he sees how you bleed and pretend you don’t. How you’ve been keeping yourself at arm’s length for months. Because you’ve cornered yourself — because you let the bruises fade without ever acknowledging how deep they burrow.
Your fingers tighten around the porcelain, like if you hold on hard enough you can keep the charade going. Pretend you don’t feel what you feel. But then, you glance up, and there it is — your reflection wavering in the split mirror, cut through by the fault line of your own indecision. Your own internal warfare.
“Yes,” you whisper. “But you knew that long ago.”
“I did.” His hand braces against the sink beside yours as he all but cages you against it. “But I keep thinking, sooner or later, you’ll let yourself stop.”
Another pause. A breath suspended in air too thick, in a space that feels too small.
“You want me to stop?”
He exhales through his nose. “I want you to want to.”
It’s an invitation. A quiet demand.
You swallow against the burn in your throat because it’s clear he knows what’s hiding behind your eyes. He’s just asking you to be honest. To pull the words from where they’ve been buried, to stop dissolving them like acid on your tongue. To let him in.
“Then you want for nothing.” Your voice is softer than you mean it to be, dangerously close to breaking. “Because you know I’d tell you anything if you asked.”
His eyes meet yours in the mirror.
“Tell me what’s making you reckless.”
You’d expected that — or something like it — but it still takes you apart. Thread by thread, a rope cinched through the hollow of your ribs. Pulling, pulling —waiting for you to give.
And you almost do. Almost let it spill, let it take shape in the open air between you. The truth of it. The rot you’ve kept pressed beneath your tongue, the slow, patient decay of something you know you shouldn’t feel.
But instead—
“It’s the head injury,” you lie.
A hollow offering. Brittle. A crumbling thing in place of the real answer.
His fingers twitch against the porcelain, reflection sharpening in the mirror — cutting through the fractures he’s causing. He doesn’t scoff. Doesn’t accuse you of lying. And that’s worse. So much worse. Because it means he’s seeing you. Means he’s waiting — sifting through the hollow, the fractions of you that no longer fit together in search of the thing you hesitate to give him.
“You can’t lie to me.” It sinks deep. Sticks somewhere you can’t pull it free. He’s right. “We both know it isn’t just that.”
You exhale something like a laugh except it’s boneless and bitter, just nerves spilling out because they’ve got no where else to go.
“Didn’t know you were a medic now.” You break your eyes back to the sink. “Or a mind reader.”
“I don’t need to be.” The words come fast. Convicting. “I just need to know you.”
And that. That makes you look up at him again. Makes you meet his eyes. Makes you burn.
“Price—“
His lips are against your ear. “Tell me.”
Your throat closes. The rope pulls tighter. You know what he wants — what he’s asking. But the answer feels like it won’t fit in your mouth. The swell of truth too large. Too longly suppressed because god this is your Captain and all he did was save your life. You know you should just be grateful and yet the only thing on your mind is granting him more than the debt you owe.
Because when you can’t swallow your demons, they don’t just disappear. They turn to hunger instead.
It was his hands that had fed them. They’re still starving now.
“The truth will ruin everything, Captain.” The words tear from your throat like he’s ripped them out himself. “This isn’t something you, or anyone, can help me with.”
You feel him go still the moment the words leave you. Feel it in the hand bracing against the sink, the exhale of his breath against your neck.
“So that’s what this is.” Your stomach coils, something twisting tight as you turn your head to face him. He doesn’t move back. Just dips his gaze to your lips. “You’re feeling too much, yeah? Think by being reckless you can run from it.”
It’s startling, the way he sees right through you. Your silence is a telling confession and he reads it like scripture.
You’ve always known it would be hard with him. Knew it from the beginning, because he’s as sharp as he is skilled, because he knows how to look at a situation and read the words left unspoken.
You nod. All while wishing it was anyone else.
“You can’t outrun this.” His voice drops, dragging his free hand up the nape of your neck. “Can’t outrun me.”
He tugs you toward him, something dark flashing beneath his eyes — something like possession, something that makes your bones ache as his mouth ghosts over yours. A torturous, drawn-out motion, withholding what you know he’ll take.
A breath passes between you, your eyes closed, a million things unspoken. Spinning. Thrumming in the silence.
Then, he brushes his lips to yours. And there’s fire.
A slow-burning ruin, heat licking through your stomach, curling in your spine, and it devours you — every breath, every instinct screaming at you to pull away, to run. It’s all gone. Gone until the moment he pulls back. Presses his forehead against yours.
“I know.” You reply, and for a second you think he’s backing off.
He doesn’t.
Lips against yours again, he takes. Your mouth parts on a sharp inhale. Shock, surrender, his tongue slipping against yours, before he kisses you hard. Like he’s been waiting for this, waiting for your admittance. Like this is something he’s fought against just as much as you have.
Your hands find his shoulders, something to brace against as he pulls you in deeper. The breath is gone from your lungs, your pulse pounding for an entirely different reason now. You open your eyes as he pulls back again. Take in the sharp cut of his features — the shadow of a beard against his jaw, the darkness of his gaze, drinking you in like he wants to keep you there.
“You don’t get to die on me,” he murmurs, and it makes your world tilt. Makes you wonder if you hit your head harder than you thought, all those months ago. Makes you wonder if you’re hallucinating. “Christ.” His fingers flex at your waist. “You don’t get to be careless.”
There’s something in him you’ve never seen before. Something undone. Something you don’t understand but do at the same time — because you feel it too. The decades of loss. The battle scars. The countless near misses that linger for life. You weren’t thrusting yourself into open fire with some raging death wish — but you weren’t being as methodical as you should have been either, all to chase that fucking adrenaline spike. You didn’t think he’d have this reaction.
And there’s so much you need to say. So much you need to do. But all you can do is whisper, breathless against him. “I’m sorry.”
There’s a pause. A click of his tongue.
“I’m not done with you.” His mouth finds yours again, something softer this time, but no less demanding. You don’t fight it. And when his free hand dips down your back, you tilt your head up into him, hands fisted in his shirt, wishing you didn’t miss the feel of it so devastatingly when he pulls back again. “You want reckless? I’ll show you fucking reckless.”
You don’t have a chance to answer before he spins you around and shoves you against the counter. A groan slips from your lips, but you relish the feel of him — the warmth of his chest as he steps into you, crowding you until all you know is his heat.
His hands slide down your sides, gripping at your hips, the heat in your gut burning hot as he holds you in place.
“This what you want?” He mutters against the side of your throat, his nose nudging your jaw. “Or do you still want to run?”
You swallow, mouth parted, breath coming hard. It’s a question, but you know he doesn’t really want an answer. Not with everything he’s doing. Not with the way he’s holding you, the way his hands slip beneath your shirt, calloused fingers grazing bare skin as he tugs the fabric up.
Your breath hitches. “Christ, Captain—”
You feel his mouth brush against your neck, tongue lavving out to taste you. Like he’s hungry and you’re a goddamn four-course meal. You moan. It’s all you can do to stay upright, legs going weak when he nips at your jaw.
“No Captain.” A demand. His hand sliding lower, dipping under the fabric of your cargos. “John.”
John. You shudder at the implication of it. John is a rare thing—something you’ve only ever heard him give to a handful of others, and no one else. John is personal. John is when he’s no longer your superior, but instead, your equal.
“John.” Somehow, it rolls off your tongue like breathing, like it had always been waiting there for this moment. Another moan follows it, just as his fingers find your clit. “Ohgod, John—”
He hums, teasing you, fingers moving in paced, languid circles like he’s got nothing but time despite the way his chest is pacing against your back. Pressure building beneath his skin. You feel the tension in him — the way his muscles shift, the way he tenses in response.
“That’s it,” he grinds out, fingers speeding up just enough. “You like that?”
Your answer is an afterthought. You don’t speak, don’t need to. Your mouth finds his again, and he swallows the breath you try to take. All you can do is nod.
And you know you have no fucking right to know what he sounds like. How he tastes as your tongue wrestles his. Your head spinning too fast for you to think because he is everywhere, a heady mix of lust and need as you desperately try to chase the way he makes your blood race. It’s all so new. So fucking wanton. Needy. As if all the months of wanting have finally caught up to the moment, a wildfire that seems to burn all logic. You know this is wrong — but fuck you don’t care.
You know in a second, he’ll be pressing you against the granite and you’ll have to make a thousand apologies to whatever god may be listening.
But then he pushes a finger into you, and you only have one prayer on your tongue. “Oh, John.”
He exhales against you, a quiet growl that goes straight to your head. It’s the same sound he makes when he’s in a combat, and there’s something about the idea of being able to make him feel the same as he feels when he’s a man of war that makes fireworks light up behind your eyelids.
“Mm. She’s fucking tight.” He mutters as he curls his finger and presses deeper. You gasp, the sound swallowed between you. “This is what you needed, hm? Needed me to pin you down. Make you fucking feel.”
That�� that’s exactly it. Your eyes dart up to his in the mirror because yes. In the fractures he’d caused he’d found what you were too afraid to verbalize. And it makes you keen — the way it’s like he can rip out your soul and hold it in his hands. You know you can’t hide it in your gaze, the desperation that comes with that kind of dependency.
Of course.
“You. Mm. You always know just what I need.” You moan out, as teasing as possible, while your climax barrels closer.
And he relishes it. Every second. It’s obvious in the sharp inhale he takes, the way his pupils dilate until the blue in his eyes look like a halo in a sea of blackened lust. Your head feels like it’s splitting in two, caught between the pressure building inside you and the heat that seems to be coiling so tight you could implode.
He adds a second finger, and you have to grip onto the counter if you want to still find your feet.
“Ohmygod—fuck, John—“
You don’t know how you look, can’t bring yourself to face your reflection — but you know how it feels, the way the world is tipping like you’re on the deck of a ship, the way your stomach clenches and your nerves light like fire under your skin. The irony of the situation isn’t lost on you. You spent months running from him just to end up here. You realize now that he’s always been a step ahead in a way you can’t understand, and you know you’re playing a game you won’t win.
“Let me feel it.” He purrs against your ear, fingers pumping. “Let it happen.”
You moan loud at that, clenching around his fingers because it already is happening. The pleasure is hot and blinding.
“Ohgod—“ your voice breaks between words, your head falling back against of his shoulder. “Fuck. I’m—“
He knows. The heat building in your gut so bright it seeps through your skin. So, he dips his other hand back beneath your shirt, palming your breast and you know it’s to make you fall even harder — and christ, he manages it. You erupt, climax hitting you like a train.
The bliss is blinding, and you want to scream — but can’t because his mouth is on yours, capturing every strangled gasp you give as you try to catch your breath. You’re trembling, legs shaking, your body trying to find some sort of ground as you gasp for breath — but then he’s pulling his hand out and sliding off to one side. You feel empty. Breathless. You think, in some dim place in your mind, that you should feel embarrassed now, but you’re too distracted to care. As your breathing returns, you can hear him sucking on his fingers.
Tasting you.
You can barely stand it, the noise curling through the fog in your head. You hear a soft pop, and suddenly his hand is on your jaw, tilting you towards the mirror, and you finally look.
You think you almost look the same. You can almost pretend that that this is what it’s always been — something fleeting and nameless and reckless — but there’s a flush on your cheeks, a gloss in your eyes, that you can’t deny. In fact, the only thing that breaks you out of the fantasy is the way John’s eyes meet yours.
As if there was ever any mistaking what you would allow to happen here. You know, looking at him, that that the hunger in your gaze would always give away the truth. That he would always know how to read you.
“Reckless.” He mutters, as if he knows exactly what you’re thinking, as if it’s something he’d known all along. You watch his jaw clench, his fingers digging into your cheeks. It’s not angry — it’s something more. A possession. “You do not get to leave me.”
You’ve known this man for barely a year, and yet he understands something you cannot. Something different from all your previous CO’s. Something that goes deeper than protection of a superior. And for the first time, you realize you can’t hide—not from him, not from whatever this is.
“Is that an order?” You whisper. Smirking.
He leans in, the heat of him branding against your spine, and you feel his words before he speaks them, rough and low on your throat.
“An order,” he echoes, hands sliding down to your hips. “And a threat.”
Your breath stutters, head spinning too fast to think. This is dangerous — whatever this is. It’s like the two of you are careening off the edge of a mountain, barreling toward something irreversible. You should stop this. You should pull away.
“Mm.” Instead, you arch your back, pressing against him with a low, breathy hum. “Now who’s being reckless.”
“Mhm. Knew you’d like that,” he mutters, mouth dragging against your jaw. His hands are already working, tugging down your zipper. “Brat.”
You should hate that word. Before him, you would have even more so. But something about the way he says it makes you bite your lip.
“You want to be put in your place.” His hands are purposed. Tugging down your cargos, undoing his belt. “That it?”
“Depends.” Your breath hitches. “Where exactly is my place, Captain?”
“Right here.” He presses you forward, palm splayed between your shoulder blades. His other hand grips your hip, dragging you against him, the thick weight of his need sliding along the slick between your thighs. You swallow a moan. “Right underneath me, Sergeant.”
You don’t answer. You can’t. Your head is spinning too fast to think. Then, he’s pushing inside you, and you lose the last of your breath.
“Fuck.” Your eyes catch in the mirror, watching as he sinks in, stretching you wide, splitting you open. The breath punches from your lungs, knuckles strained where you brace against the counter. Your head falls back, and he groans — a low, guttural sound that ripples through you. “Price—“
His fingers press into your jaw, turning your gaze back to the mirror. “Look at me.”
You do. And God. You wish you hadn’t.
Dark, blown-out pupils devour the blue of his irises. His chest heaves, the cords of his neck pulled tight. You don’t think you’ve ever seen anything more wrecked, more devastating, than the way he looks at you now.
“Good girl,” he mutters, voice thick with it, and your cunt clenches around him in response. His breath stutters. “God, you take me so—” you whimper, rolling your hips to meet his, and he hisses. “Yeah,” his mouth finds your ear. “Show me what you can give me—”
You try. You really do. But fuck—
“Huge,” you gasp, tipping onto your toes for respite as he buries himself to the hilt. “Fuck—John—”
“Mhm. Don’t run—” his hand slides up your throat, fingers curling, just enough to make it dangerous. You gasp, pulse hammering against his palm. He knows. Of course he does. The way he knows everything about you. “You’ll get used to it.”
You’ll get used to it.
The words echo back at you. The same ones he murmured the first time you asked him if he’s always this persistent. If you could think, you’d laugh. But you can’t. Because now you know the answer. Yes, he is always this persistent. And no, you will never fucking get used to it.
Your moans have long since lost restraint, spilling from your lips in time with his thrusts, raw and wanton and so fucking desperate. He takes you like it’s not the first time, like he’s not far too big to be this deep — his grip bruising in the best way, dragging you closer and closer to the edge. You feel the fractures of yourself, a thousand pieces of you suspended midair, trembling on the verge of shattering. You’ve never been this close to the sun. And god, if it doesn’t feel like fire.
Then, he says your name.
Your name. Your real name.
And it’s like breaking the surface of water after nearly drowning—like oxygen flooding into starving lungs. It strips you raw, turns the world molten beneath you, sends you spiraling into release all over again, the pleasure so sharp it almost aches. His hand claps over your mouth, muffling your sob of a moan as your body locks up, trembling.
“Yeah. There we go. Let it all out f’me.” His voice is dark, rough with something that sends another sharp pulse between your legs. His hips slap against your ass, relentless. “I’ve fucking got you.”
And you know he does. In a way you don’t trust your breath or your bones. In a way that terrifies you just as much as it makes you need.
Your vision blurs, heat rippling through your limbs, but he—he is unmoving. Steady. Like steel. Like he can take you at your best and your worst. Like he could tame this thing between you, whatever reckless, nameless thing this is, and make it his.
“That’s right. You look at yourself,” he grunts, one hand digging into your hip, the other still clamped over your mouth. Your glassy eyes flick up to the mirror, catching his reflection behind you—pupils blackened, lips parted, gaze locked on you. “M’gonna dumb you out. Fuck you ’til you can’t walk, never mind run.”
Your nails scrape divots into the granite as he shoves you further over the counter, forcing you to take him deeper. A wrecked whimper slips through your teeth, body caught between overstimulation and desperate, eager want. You squeeze your eyes shut, feeling the slick drip down your thighs, soaking into your ruined cargos — you know he can feel it too.
“Shit.” He rasps, voice fraying. His hand leaves your mouth, slides down to your throat, not squeezing, just holding as his other moves. Fingers finding the mess between your legs, pressing slow circles over your swollen clit. “Tight little slut.”
Your body jerks. “Fuck—John—”
“That’s it. Gimme another,” he mutters, rolling his hips, hitting something deep inside you that makes your vision blur. “C’mon, sweetheart, I know you can.”
It’s too much. The thick, hot drag of his dick with every punishing thrust — the rough slide of his fingers. The weight of his body pressing you into the counter like he’ll never let you go. You can’t think. Can’t breathe—
And then he growls your name again, deep and needing, and it sends you over with a broken sob, body writhing, mind slipping into static as you cum again, clenched so tight around him it makes him stutter.
His hand fists in your hair, dragging your head back so his lips brush your ear. “Good girl. Fucking perfect—”
You feel it when he loses himself. Through the fog of pure bliss. When his grip turns almost punishing, when his hips stutter, when the ragged groan tears through his throat. He grinds deep, burying himself to the hilt, body rigid as he groans and spills inside you with a choked curse.
And then, there’s stillness.
Both of you breathing uneven — more so him, heavy against the nape of your neck. And for a long moment, it’s just that. Just the sound of your bodies slowing, just the lingering thrum of pleasure untwisting from both of your bloodstreams.
Then, his fingers tighten on your throat. Just enough. Just to make sure you feel it.
“You ever pull some reckless shit like that again,” he mutters, voice raw, scraping against your ear, “you won’t be able to fucking talk when I’m done with you.”
Your breath stutters, thighs twitching at the promise in his tone.
“You got a problem, you come to me. You don’t run. Don’t put yourself into the fire just to fucking feel something.” His hand slides up, grips your jaw, tilts your head just enough so you can see him in the mirror — blue eyes all pupil, sharp jaw clenched. “You’re mine,” he murmurs. “And I take care of what’s mine. No matter what.”
A slow, shuddering breath leaves you. He watches your lips part, watches the way your body reacts to his words. Then, his grip on your throat eases. A slow drag of his hands down your body, like he’s memorizing the feeling of you ruined under him.
“Understand me?” His voice is quieter now, but no less dangerous.
You swallow. Nod. “Yes sir.”
He hums. Seemingly satisfied, pressing a slow, lingering kiss to the back of your shoulder.
“Good.”
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descendant-of-truth · 2 years ago
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Shipping is fun and all but I swear every single time someone makes a comment, whether as a joke or in a legitimate analysis, about there being "no other explanation" for a pair's interactions, I lose just a bit more of my sanity
Like, no, you guys don't get it. Romance is not about the Amount of devotion, it's about the COLOR. the FLAVOR of it all. a character can be just as devoted to their platonic friend as they are to their romantic partner, and they don't love either of them more, just differently.
But because the majority of people still have it stuck in their minds that romance exists on the highest tier of love, I'm stuck seeing endless takes that boil down to "these two care about each other too much for it to NOT be romantic" as if that's the core determining factor to how literally any of this works
In conclusion: stop telling me that I don't understand the story if I don't interpret the leads as romantic, I am TIRED
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pomefioredove · 1 year ago
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only one bed room
summary: it's the sdc and everyone's staying over at ramshackle but, oh no! you're one room and one bed short. being the generous (or gullible) soul that you are, you agree to share characters: all sdc competitors, separate additional info: fair warning I have no replayed book 5 in a while, reader is yuu, reader is gender neutral, rook is rook, most scenarios end in cuddles. can be interpreted as romantic or platonic (nix vil and rook's part)
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Deuce Spade
"I don't mind sleeping on the floor!"
it's a big fat no from Vil. waking up sore and tired is unacceptable, and will affect his performance during practice. he will use the bed, end of story.
you offer to take the floor or one of the many stiff and uncomfortable couches in Ramshackle, but he refuses
what kind of aspiring honor student would he be if he kicked you out of your own room?
so, yes, you end up sharing the bed
he's a perfect gentleman about it
he insists on sleeping on the complete opposite end of the bed
to give you your space, of course
not because he's nervous
obviously it doesn't pan out- he's kind of a messy sleeper, and on the first night you wake up with him sprawled on top of you
you decide not to wake him up
you'd been thinking about saving for a weighted blanket, anyway
Ace Trappola
"you better not hog the blankets,"
takes it like a champ, though he might be screaming internally
he already sleeps in a dorm with three other guys- this can't be any different, right?
it totally is
sharing a bed with someone? someone he likes, who he isn't just forced to live with for convenience?
he's not sure how to tease you about this one without coming off as nervous himself
so he just shuts his trap about it (for once) and accepts his fate
in the end, it's no big deal for a player like him
he ends up hogging the blankets, though. hypocrite.
Kalim al-Asim
"YAYYY SLEEPOVER!"
he means exactly what he says
not a care in the world
all he's thinking about is how fun this is going to be! just him and his favorite Ramshackle prefect (Grim heard the news and will be staying in deuce's room to avoid any cracker mishaps)
Kalim, admittedly, is not a creature of great thought. he tends to be dictated by his feelings, and he can be a little selfish sometimes
so when Jamil pulled him aside and asked him to just buy another bed for ramshackle, he ignored him entirely
why would he do that? the situation is resolved, and everyone's happy!
well... not everyone, but Kalim's happy!
he stocks up on Vil-approved snacks, insists you two braid each other's hair and stay up late into the night talking with no one to remind you to go to sleep
(he tried to invite Jamil and got the door slammed in his face)
this arrangement lasts approximately one night
when Vil sees the dark circles under your eyes, it's over
you are confined to the couch, and Kalim is forced to sleep alone
Jamil Viper
"okay,"
really. he's totally fine with it.
besides the fact that he doesn't want to cause any more trouble, he's shared beds with his siblings before. no big deal
he just wasn't expecting to wake up with you snuggled against him
but this is fine
totally fine
he's barely conscious and it's early morning, still dark, the time he's used to getting up at
Vil has things covered, right? he can stay here for a little while longer. it would be awkward trying to get up without waking you
it feels nice having something all to himself for once
he smirks, imagining how jealous everyone else would be:
the beautiful, kind, intelligent ramshackle prefect in his arms? oh, the looks on their faces would almost make this whole thing worth it!
but in the end, he decides to say nothing
he wants to keep you all to himself, after all
for just a little while longer
Epel Felmier
"ain't no way I'm sharing!"
that's what he says in his head, anyway. but it's late and he's worn out from practice (and being shouted at) so he just sighs and accepts his fate
of course Vil would make him do it. it's probably because he's the smallest, isn't it?
you can tell he's unhappy with the arrangement (not that he's making much of a secret of it- he's grumbling under his breath all evening)
he starts coming around to the idea when he wakes up holding something warm
his heart jumpstarts and he nearly panics before remembering where he is
and then he realizes the thing he's holding is... you. somehow the two of you had ended up spooning during the night
but, more importantly... he's the big spoon!
he's almost tempted to wake you to announce that he, in all his manly glory, had naturally assumed the most masculine cuddling position!
(yes he sounds ridiculous. just let him have this one)
he lets you sleep, though. just a little more won't hurt anyone, right?
he's okay with the arrangement after that
Rook Hunt
"I will do it!"
Vil isn't even able to finish his sentence before the vice housewarden is practically jumping up and down
pretty much everyone breathes a collective sigh of relief; a volunteer! thank the sevens. otherwise, this could get awkward...
of course, he quite intentionally ends up with you in his arms
but not for any nefarious purpose, he insists!
he's a light sleeper, and can be stirred by any sudden noise or movement
you appeared to be having some kind of nightmare
it reminds him of a small animal caught in a trap, struggling for its life. he can't bear to see it- it's cruel to let a poor creature go on suffering before you can make the kill
of course, instead of killing you (thank the sevens), he decides to comfort you
he presses your head against his chest so you can hear his heartbeat, and he runs his fingers through your hair until you calm down.
then he keeps you there, just to be sure you don't have another bad dream
if you gave him permission, he would gladly be all over you in seconds. kissing up and down your shoulders, caressing every perfect inch of your body, whispering words of admiration
but he's perfectly content just cradling you for now
hopefully, you will continue to have these nightmares and give him excuses to do this again
Vil Schoenheit
"don't argue with me,"
initially, you just gave him the bed
maybe you were afraid of him; maybe you like him; maybe you just wanted to avoid a conflict altogether
either way, you spent the first night on the terribly uncomfortable floor, and trudged through Ramshackle like a zombie the next morning
Vil was feeling guilty watching you
what? he's not a monster
and he's a leader, which means he has a responsibility. and you had so graciously invited them all into your home...
fine! he'll share. he insists, even
when you try to argue, he shuts you down, repeating all that stuff about responsibility and hospitality, blah blah
and he doesn't want the team manager dead on their feet
arguing with him is pointless, so you just agree
he wakes up with you against him, sleeping peacefully
now, if it were you clinging to him- he might have had a good chuckle. can't keep your hands to yourself, prefect? I'm just that irresistible?
but the way he's holding you, the way his arms are so tightly wrapped around your waist, the way he's so clearly pressing you against him...
he hates to admit it, but you're an elegant sleeper. it's almost cute
the tension is relieved from your face, your breathing graceful and steady, and your perfect lips open just a sliver...
he is a perfect gentleman, and would never dream of doing anything without your explicit permission, but for one shameful second he thinks about how easy it would be to kiss you
... and then he quickly puts those thoughts aside and tries to get back to sleep
he doesn't want any dark circles, after all
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suliigwp · 29 days ago
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Hi! Could you write another part for the Vroom Vroom story? Like they are all doing the interviews together and a reporter asks a question that she does not quite understand. Lewis or Alonso see that and try and explain it to her and the interview derails from there.
EMOTION ARC: MANY
Rookie! Reader x Platonic! Paddock
Previous Part!
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SULI: I didn't think our vroom vroom would receive so much love, I'm so glad you're enjoying it! Here's another crack fic before the big more serious one comes! Thank you for requesting!
Warnings: pineapple on pizza mentioned, none!
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The room is packed. Cameras flash, reporters fidget with recorders, and three drivers take their seats at the middle: Fernando Alonso, composed and sipping water like he didn’t just dodge chaos for 58 laps; Lewis Hamilton, ever-charismatic and polished, nodding to the crowd; and smack in the middle—The Rookie.
She’s wearing her race suit half unzipped over her team shirt, podium cap slightly crooked, and clutching the miniature champagne bottle like it’s a trophy. And her expression reads somewhere between am I still dreaming? and what happens if I open this bottle inside?
The moderator clears his throat.
“Congratulations to all drivers. We’ll open up the floor for questions.”
A reporter in the front row lifts a hand.
“This question is for our rookie. Congratulations on your first podium! Can you walk us through the emotional arc of your race?”
There’s a long pause.
The rookie leans forward toward the mic slowly, eyebrows drawn together in total confusion.
“…What is arc?”
She says it like someone just asked her to explain quantum physics using only interpretive dance.
Lewis, sitting next to her, is already smiling, having expected this exact energy.
“It means… like the emotional journey. How you felt at different points. Start, middle, end. That kind of thing.”
Still chewing gum, she nods slowly, visibly processing. Then, seriously:
“Ah. Okay. So…”
She leans into the mic again with full confidence now:
“Start: Scared. Turn 1: Still scared. Turn 3: Someone yell at me. Lap 7: I yell back. Then… vroom vroom. Rain happen. More vroom. Almost spin. I scream. I close eyes. Still drive. Then boom—I’m here. Emotion arc: Many.”
She finishes with a victorious sip of champagne and a shrug.
Fernando chokes slightly on his water.
Lewis is laughing, head down.
The press corps is stunned silent—then someone lets out a snort, and the whole room breaks into chuckles.
A second reporter raises a hand, trying to get things back on track.
“And how did you feel about the tyre strategy today?”
Rookie nods proudly.
“I do tyres.”
Dead silence.
Lewis blinks. “You… what?”
“I do tyres. I… use them. Good. Not bad. Round.”
Fernando leans toward the mic, totally deadpan.
“What she means is—her engineer made all the tyre decisions, and she said ‘okay’ with no clue what any of it meant.”
Rookie holds up a hand to correct him:
“No no. I say ‘okay’ very confidently. That is important. I fake it. I pretend I know. That is strategy.”
Lewis, still laughing:
“So you had no idea what tyre you were on?”
She pauses. Then:
“…Were they… black?”
Lewis slaps the desk. Fernando actually laughs out loud this time.
She points to Fernando and Lewis with both fingers like she’s shooting finger guns.
“Listen. You two talk too much about apex and degradation and undercut. I go vroom. That is my arc.”
The next reporter can barely hold a straight face but tries anyway:
“Okay… what was going through your mind when you crossed the finish line?”
She goes completely still, staring into the distance. Her voice drops into mock-dramatic whisper.
“I think… if I crash now… they still count, yes?"
Fernando puts his head in his hands.
“I want to say this is all an act, but I saw her spin in pit lane yesterday trying to wave at a pigeon.”
She shrugs again. “He looked friendly.”
Lewis tries to redirect:
“Let’s not forget she got P3 in the rain, held off Checo for five laps, and still had time to sing ABBA on the radio.”
She points triumphantly.
“Yes! This is why I win. Because of ABBA. And my skill. And because I forget to brake.”
Fernando stares at her.
“You… you forgot to brake?”
She looks unsure.
“I think maybe. I do one tiny brake. Just for fun. Mostly… vibes.”
At this point, a poor reporter in the back is just holding up a recorder, looking vaguely haunted.
Moderator clears his throat, half-chuckling.
“We’ll take one last question.”
A quiet voice from the back:
“What’s your goal for the rest of the season?”
She grins like she’s been waiting for this one.
“More podiums. More tyres. Less understanding. And… maybe one donut.”
She leans toward Lewis. “You teach me donut?”
Lewis, smiling warmly:
“Only if you promise to learn what a yellow flag is.”
She nods.
“Deal. But only yellow. No time for green.”
Fernando raises a hand.
“I would like to formally request she never meets Ricciardo.”
Lewis agrees.
“Or Kimi. We cannot risk it.”
She points between the two of them, grinning.
“Old men fear me. This means I win.”
As the conference ends and the drivers rise, Lewis drapes an arm around her shoulders, still chuckling.
“You know… you might actually be the future of the sport.”
She looks dead serious.
“Yes. But also… I want pizza now.”
Fernando, walking past her, doesn’t even break stride.
“If she podiums again, someone better bring pineapple pizza. Chaos deserves chaos.”
next part!
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