#you decide who jaskier stays with

[ladyannemarie5]

So... Remember my old post of WarLord!Geralt searching for the bard and discovering that Jaskier is Radovid's consort in Redania?

You can see it here

Well, I couldn't stop thinking about that and here's just part of what I've come up with so far. 

Caution: Lots and lots of text. Almost 2k words.

-----

Geralt's first formal order as Warlord of the North is to search the continent for the bard Jaskier.

Five years have passed since Geralt last saw Jaskier. Five years since the mountain disaster and the day Geralt made the bard believe that the greatest blessing of his life would be to get rid of him.

Since then, Geralt has found his surprise child, resolved his issues with Yennefer and formed a new empire under his and the other witchers' command. And there hasn't been a single moment when he hasn't regretted pushing his bard away. 

That is why, as soon as political things settle down and his mainly non-human subjects begin to form real households, the new warlord sends all available people to search for the man who made him White Wolf.

He knows from Yen, that Jaskier became the Sandpiper, so he has the witchers approach the smuggling network to help the refugees get to his new realm and also to gather as much information as they can about the poet's whereabouts. 

They hear rumors and whispers about the famous bard Jaskier singing in taverns and famous courts, but every time they reach the last place where he was seen, it turns out that the bard has already departed. It also seems that 20 years at the side of a witcher have made him very good at running away from them without a trace. 

Geralt grows more desperate by the day. He wants to apologize to Jaskier, he wants to tell him how sorry he is and how much he wants him to come back to him, because he is finally ready to stop running away from his feelings. He needs Jaskier by his side, either as his lover or simply as his friend. He just needs to know that the poet is safe and sound.

That's why his heartbeat stops for a moment when new information arrives from the bard. It turns out that Nilfgaard beat him to it and captured Jaskier months ago. 

Geralt moves all his people to search for the place where the bard is being held prisoner until they finally find the small fort where their sources say he is. Geralt himself leads the attack.

Everyone is really confused when they break through the entrances and discover that there is no one alive there. There are only remnants that there was once a small army operating in the place but they fled some time ago. 

Unfortunately, there are also remnants of torture in one of the fort's dungeons. Geralt feels an immense urge to vomit as he enters the place and the smell of Jaskier's blood reaches his nostrils. His eyes sting with tears of anger and sadness when he finds a piece of blue silk in one of the corners. His anger and grief increase when they find a funeral pyre on the outskirts of the site. Jaskier is gone forever.

Shortly thereafter, the University of Oxenfurt issues a statement mourning the death of its greatest teacher and legend, the bard Jaskier. Apparently, a Redanian convoy was on a reconnaissance mission when they found a fort with remnants of Nilfgaard troops. Upon entering they discovered that the soldiers had already left but had left the body of a man in one of the dungeons. One of the men, apparently a fan of the bard, recognized his belongings and alerted his superiors to the man's identity. Jaskier's body was burned by the Redanians due to the advanced state of decomposition. All that remained was a broken elven lute that was given to the university as proof of the poet's death.  

Geralt demands that the lute be given to him. Eskel and Lambert are required to hold it when the dean refuses to give the instrument to the witcher on the grounds that Jaskier himself had left them to them in his will. The document firmly states that all of the bard's possessions were to pass to the university to dispose of as they see fit. 

Geralt cries for the first time in years when he finds out. Officially, he has nothing left of his bard. 

The Sandpiper network continues to operate as usual, at least for a while since the discovery of the fort, until something incredible happens: Redania enacts a new law saying that all elves, dwarves and other non-humans would no longer be persecuted, and could even choose to be legal citizens of Redania. 

Years pass since then. Ciri, Yen, Triss and his brother witchers remain by his side and life on the continent continues almost unchanged as the White Wolf finishes consolidating himself as a monarch of a strong and prosperous territory. The hope that Jaskier will one day appear alive and singing about the Warlord every day fades. They hadn't seen the body and when Yen wanted to use a tracking spell with the lute just to make sure, it led to nothing.

And then politics suffers another attack: King Vizimir of Redania is murdered. Yen says that rumors point to his own brother, Prince Radovid, being the one who murdered him, as he was crowned that very night at the side of his lover, a random nobleman named Julian. Geralt does not doubt it. Humans are cruel and ambitious.

The obligatory mourning passes slowly, one day all the kingdoms (except Nilfgaard) are summoned to celebrate the new king and his consort. To the surprise of everyone in Kaer Morhen, the White Wolf and his entourage are invited to the celebrations. Yen and Triss say that it would be rude not to go, as Redania fully recognizes their kingdom unlike other territories, so it would be beneficial for Geralt to attend and seal ties with a kingdom as powerful as Redania. 

Geralt wants nothing more than to stay in Kaer Morhen and continue to evade the outside world. Jaskier is no longer in it so there is nothing interesting out there. But he knows it's inevitable that he will attend the Redania celebrations, and Yen is right, it's a great opportunity. So he and his entourage leave for the kingdom. 

They are greeted in a grand manner, just like any other monarch and his entourage. Redania has shown that he wants to form ties with Kaer Morhen, so Geralt decides that he will do his best to make it all go well. It seems that King Radovid himself and his consort will welcome them once they have settled in properly. 

Geralt feels all the air leave his lungs, his head feels heavy and in turmoil, and he thinks he will burn Redania to the ground for such an offense. Next to King Radovid, stands a man with blue eyes and brown hair. A man resembling Jaskier stands right there, his arm resting on the king's arm. 

He introduces himself as Julian Alfred Pankratz, formerly Viscount of Lettenhove, now royal consort to King Radovid.

Yen cannot help but advance to him with a murderous look. He magically probes him and in an icy voice lets them all know that he really is Jaskier, the bard dead years ago. Julian replies that it's really good to see everyone once again. 

The welcome feast begins. Geralt can't take his eyes off Jaskier. The king and his consort act like any normal couple, both conversing with each other, together and very intimate. Geralt feels his stomach churn. 

At some point in the night, Julian manages to sneak into Geralt's room. He silently asks the Witcher to verify that no one is listening and that there are no traces of magic around. Geralt confirms that they are alone. 

Geralt has many questions, but he can't say any. Not with the man he thought was dead in front of him. But he finally gets something out of his mouth, asking for explanations. 

Julian tells the witcher that after the mountain he traveled for a while by himself, but seeing the injustices to the elves and other non-humans made him want to do something. With his contacts in the RSS he became the Sandpiper. He would go back and forth from Oxenfurt to other places on the continent to recruit new people into the network. During his stays in Oxenfurt and thanks to Philippa and Dijkstra, he met Prince Radovid. 

Geralt's heart breaks when he hears from the bard how lonely and desperate he felt until Radovid came into his life.

"By the time I realized it, I was lost and hopelessly in love with Radovid," he tells Geralt. 

The warlord can't help but mention that the bard fell in love with a king-killer. Julian jumps to his consort's defense and tells Geralt everything. 

Philippa and Dijkstra want to take Redania to war against Nilfgaard, they assassinated Queen Hedwig to make Vizimir give in to their advice, however, the king didn't. The two councilors then went to harass Jaskier, threatening his job as the Sandpiper to tell them the location of Geralt and Ciri, so they could use it as political leverage against Nilfgaard. Of course the bard refused. 

So Jaskier was kidnapped and tortured by Nilfgaard to find out the location of Geralt and Ciri. Radovid, madly in love and worried about Jaskier, set out to look for him everywhere, until he was finally found dying in the fort. Philippa and her magic saved him. 

Radovid, concerned for the bard's safety, proposed to him to fake his death in order to drive away all those who were looking for him, including the man who despised him on a mountain. Jaskier accepted on the condition that he stop pursuing the elves. 

As the announcement of Jaskier's death shook the entire continent, he and the prince planned to leave the castle and travel together, away from the intrigues of the court. Vizimir, happy for his brother, immediately agreed to let them both leave as long as they accepted his help and communicated constantly. The night of their departure, Vizimir was assassinated. 

Geralt is shaken when Jaskier tells him that Philippa and Dijkstra killed Vizimir so they could manipulate Radovid and take Redania to war. The new king is stalling as long as possible, but there is no denying the influence of both advisors on the king's decisions. Geralt snarls when he learns that the sorceress and spymaster are threatening the former bard's life to make Radovid do as they command. 

Jaskier knows that Geralt hates him, that he is not complying with the one thing he has asked of him, but he needs him to get Dijkstra and Philippa out of the picture so he can save Redania and his lover from going to war. And so he lets the witcher know. 

------

And well, that's it. At least until now. 

I want to clarify that anyone who wants to write this has my absolute permission to do so, just tell me so I can read it because I definitely don't think I'll write it myself. If you want to comment on something, another idea, another point, an insult, change something to this. etc., you are welcome to do so. I don't usually reply much but I really do read everything posted on Tumblr. 

Thanks if you read all this verbal vomit and apologies once again for the huge amount of words.

[shy-urban-hobbit]

“I mean, you’ve got to feel a little sorry for them really haven’t you?” Jaskier said from where he was mopping up the last of the evidence of the half dead rat Roach had thoughtfully decided to gift them (the first time it happened he’d shrieked in surprise before Geralt put it out of its misery with a matter of fact “Welcome to country living, city boy”). Geralt gave a non committal hum from where he was warming milk up for Ciri on the stove. The little girl sat colouring at the large kitchen table - too large for two, but that would change when Geralt’s brothers and any guests they decided to bring descended on them.

“I mean they’re just minding their own business like, Oh I’m a hungry rat. Please don’t kill me.” Here Jaskier put on a slightly squeaky voice and held up his hands in imitation of paws, still holding onto the mop, “And then wham one of the last things they see is Roach’s teeth coming towards them. So many teeth.” He gave the resident farm cat a critical stare and received a dismissive tail flick in response.

Ciri giggled at his antics which caused him to grin back at her in return. It always felt like a special sort of personal victory when he managed to coax a laugh out of the little girl.

Despite being together for six months, he was still being introduced to her as her father’s ‘friend’ (which was true enough, they wouldn’t be dating if they didn’t get along) and Jaskier was happy to go along with it. Geralt had explained without revealing too much that the little one had been let down by too many adults in her life already, himself included, and ‘boyfriend’ was maybe just a little too official sounding for the time being (and if he said his heart hadn’t broken a little for the five year old smiling at him from Geralt’s phone, he’d by lying), especially after the shit that had gone down with his ex. Geralt hadn’t gone into detail but from what Jaskier had gathered, the woman had had a hidden agenda in wanting to get back with Geralt and Ciri had almost gotten seriously hurt as a result. Geralt had blamed himself for jumping back into the relationship too quickly and so, any potential partners now had to pass what Jaskier had dubbed ‘The Ciri test’.  

He liked to think he’d passed the first portion with flying colours, the tiny blonde seeming perfectly comfortable with him in public places. Now they were dipping their toes into Jaskier staying in their home for longer periods, with Jaskier having graduated from the guest bedroom to sharing with Geralt the previous visit (the brunette wanting the ground to swallow him up when she happily informed her Uncle Eskel of ‘Daddy’s sleepover’ when the man had dropped by unexpectedly the following morning. Geralt had just shrugged and told him to be thankful it hadn’t been Lambert; who could and would, happily take the piss forever).

“Alright Ciri, put your things away and then go get your bedtime book. I’ll be in in a minute.” Geralt said, pouring the warm milk into a plastic My Little Pony cup.

“I want Jask.” Ciri declared form where she was trying to force the crayons back into their box by the (relatively small) handful, Causing both adults to stop what they’d been doing and stare at one another. This was new.

“You sure you don’t want daddy?” Jaskier asked, looking to Geralt for some sign as to what he should do.

“You do better funny voices. Daddy’s all sound the same.”

It took everything Jaskier had not to burst out laughing at that as he took in the minute eye twitch from the other man at that statement, “Geralt?”

Geralt nodded, “Mind if I stay and listen? You know how much I love The Gruffalo.”

Jaskier snorted and felt a surge of fondness. The lies we tell for our children.

It ended up being a joint effort, with Geralt guest starring as The Gruffalo “On account of you being so, well...gruff.” and admitting to a slightly too smug looking Jaskier and a mostly asleep Ciri that “Yes, Jaskier does better voices for everyone else. Especially Mouse.”

"Everything ok? You’ve gone all quiet on me.” Jaskier said from where he had his head in Geralt’s lap as they watched some mindless Netflix show. “I didn’t overstep did I?” He was suddenly frantic, his anxieties bubbling back up to the surface now that he didn’t have a performance and an audience to focus on, “I know you probably just said yes so things wouldn’t be awkward. I probably should have told her no and come up with an excuse but how can anybody say no to that face-“

“Jaskier. It’s fine, honestly.” Geralt said, rubbing his hands up and down Jaskier’s arm in a way he knew calmed him, “I’ve built up something of an immunity to Ciri’s puppy eyes. I would’ve said no if I had a problem with it. I’m just thinking.”

“About?”

“About how I might have a question for Ciri.”

The next morning saw Jaskier seeing both of them off with a hug (also accompanied by fishing a stray cheerio out of Ciri’s hair which he had been too tired to question) before heading back to his city apartment and his job as a music tutor.

“Ciri?” Geralt asked, putting her school backpack by the door as he knelt down to help her button up her coat, “You know how Aiden is Uncle Lambert’s boyfriend?"

It had slowly been killing Jaskier not to check his phone as soon as the text notification came through but he was nothing if not professional and he would not check his phone when he was in the middle of a lesson. Thank the Gods he did wait as he was prettu sure he gave his retreating student a minor heart attack with the squeal he let out at Geralt’s message:

‘Ciri has been proudly announcing to her classmates this morning that Jaskier is her daddy’s boyfriend. Much disappointment from the single mums.’

[ammarettu]

Writing prompt: Curse breaking, true hate's kiss.

It's been two weeks since that horrible wretch of a mage falsely seduced him. Wandering hands on his chest and muttered words of adoration had distracted him from that distinct crackle and the faint scent of ozone.

He should have known better.

Should have seen it, or sensed it. He knows mages. Knows what they're capable of, their temperaments and egos. It wasn't until she was uttering about how he needed to learn to be humble, not to try and worm his way into everyone's good graces. Had to accept that people - no one - wanted him, that he noticed what she was.

So, instead of getting laid, he'd gotten cursed.

At least, mercifully, she'd told him the means to breaking the curse, which left him unable to speak, sing, or write.

True hate's kiss. Kiss someone who well and truely hates him. Perfect.

Which is how he now finds himself trudging through the overgrown wilderness, chasing rumors of a white-haired Witcher despite promising on the top of that fucking mountain that he would never bother him again.

He's still angry. Still hurt. His heart aches with every step closer, feels flayed open like bass being salted for dinner - and now he's hungry on top of it all!

He knows Geralt is going to be angry, annoyed at having to see him again even after the six months that have passed, but it can't be helped.

Jaskier's boots are caked in mud, the soles worn thin - he's pretty sure he's more blister than man at this point, despite his feet being used to years of walking, he's spent quite a bit of time in one place recently. He's gone soft rather quickly, it seems. (That tends to happen when you drink yourself stupid almost every night.)

He's close now.

He can see the smoke of a fire rising from above the trees, just past a village that told him the White Wolf had been staying nearby for the past several weeks, slaying mosntsers, refusing coin and only coming into town to sell the parts.

The woods here are dense, he'd curse at the branches smacking him in the face if he could, nature can eat his entire ass, thank you very much.

So maybe he's in a bit of a bad mood. Usually, the dense foliage, verdant and towering, letting through faint rays of sun that glitter on the moss and stones of the ground would inspire him to compose. Today he can only feel anger, because if he lets himself feel anything else he'll remember how heartbroken he is and start weeping like a small child.

So he's angry.

Angry at the branches. Angry at the Witcher.

Geralt hears him approach, of course he does. He's a Witcher, and an extra special one at that. The thought irks something in him that wants to taunt, "Ooh, so special, such a special boy," but again, that would be childish. And he can't talk.

When he reaches the clearing Geralt is there, sitting on a log facing away from him, hunched over as though trying to make himself smaller. Jaskier is half expecting him to growl or threaten him. Instead, he gets a quiet, "Bard?"

It's a question, and Geralt doesn't even bother to look at him or use his name. It makes Jaskier seethe.

He rounds the log the Witcher is sitting on, stands glaring down at him with his hands on his hips. Geralt keeps his eyes locked on the fire. Doesn't lift his gaze. It would hurt, would break his heart if there was anything of it left to break. He hates that Geralt hates him so much he can't even bear to look at him, or say his name.

He might as well get this over with. Might as well bite the rapier, so to speak, and get out of Geralt's hair before the Witcher decides to tear him a new set of holes.

He steps forward, into Geralt's space, winds his fingers into that glorious white hair, which is looking and feeling worse for wear - all of Geralt is, really. He's dirty, unshaven, looks ragged and worn and disheveled. He ignores that observation and yanks back on his silver locks until his head is tilted the way he wants it to be, leans down, and kisses him.

Jaskier normally isn't the type to kiss people who don't want it. Consent is important and he'll cut the balls off anyone who says otherwise, but this is important. Geralt won't forgive him, but he already hates the bard so there really isn't much lost there.

Then, hands are on his waist tugging him closer and a tongue is in his mouth and - Geralt is kissing him back. He's confused as all hell but not complaining, he's not an idiot!

Well, not that kind anyways.

When they break apart Geralt is looking up at him with furrowed brows, confused. Not angry.

"Mm, not... that I don't... why?"

Jaskier rolls his eyes and opens his mouth to speak - nothing. No sound. All that effort wasted. Geralt doesn't even hate him enough to break a fucking curse.

"Jaskier?"

He shakes his head, fighting back tears, unsure how to explain to a man who hates him but doesn't hate him enough why he's just assaulted him.

Jaskier flops onto the log next to Geralt and gestures vaguely, makes a talking motion with his hand, then an X with his arms.

"Can't talk?"

At least Geralt is smart, most Witchers are, in Jaskier's experience. They solve murders, chase monsters. They have to be good at reading between the lines, but only if those lines aren't emotions.

"Mm," Geralt looks him over, pulls his pendant from his neck and holds it up to Jaskier, "Magic. Curse?" Jaskier nods. Geralt swallows, "The cure is... a kiss?"

Jaskier nods again, sighs.

"From... what? Usually it's true love." He sounds oddly hopeful. Fidgets in a way that Jaskier has never seen. Jaskier shakes his head, ponders how to explain this absolute clusterfuck.

If Geralt didn't work there's only one other option anyways.

Valdo Marx.

((Now with part 2 ))

[queenunderthatmountain]

okay but book jaskier is so special to me

Him just being this childish, flirty, and self loving pretty man in his fourties who makes inappropriate jokes at the wrong time and always ends up in situations that he needs to be saved from

but him also being so much more than just this basic, seen before, comic relief.

him being an artist, above all else, a really good one, one that can make people passionate and sad and feel all the emotions he feels. wasnt he even a teacher at oxenfurt? like teacher jaskier pls give it all to me

him coming from a rich family, being educated but deciding that his art is all he needs and to live his life in the fullest

him always thinking he's not brave enough, but for the people he loves he goes through danger and discomfort, as long as he possibly could, longer than anyone, including himself would have thought

him also being just a really lovable person? him chosing Geralt, cold seeming, unsocial, sad Geralt as his best friend (in the books thats the kind of realtionship i see them as) and just making Geralt love him, even though he fucks things up on a regular basis, can be annoying as hell and lands them in the strangest ans messiest situation, Geralt loves his bestie so much, he would go through anything for him without making Jaskier feel bad for it

sure he might sometimes be annoyed but would never truly be angry and never ever abandon him do you hear me netflix

he could have all the company in the world, but he chose to stay with the outcast, the brewing, dangerous man who is unwanted and unwelcomed by society, and never regretted it

In conclusion Jaskier is a very special being and means the world to me

[annmarcus63]

“If life could give me a blessing, it’d be to take you off my hands”

The wind whips around them and Jaskier fears it will be strong enough to carry away the pieces of his broken heart. But instead of succumbing to shock and sadness, fury and indignation helps him to finally confront the witcher. 

"Oh, no, witcher, you're not doing this." the bard stomps all the way down to meet the other's tense back. "What, since you can't keep the witch, now you don't want me either? Well, guess what, witcher, I'm not a dog you can kick whenever you feel like it.” He shouts at him and in the last sentence, with both hands, he pushes Geralt's shoulders, who, of course, does not move an inch.

"Go away, bard." Jaskier is laughing his head off, he thinks he looks crazy, but couldn't care less. 

"Oh, oh, oh, oh, no, not this again. Do you really think you can erase all our history by giving me an impersonal title" What bothers him most is Geralt's passive face, when seconds ago it was full of what Jaskier might call hatred.

"Go away, Jaskier."

"No," he replies, closing the gap between them, another step back and they would both fall over the edge. Finally the mask of calm falls from the witcher's face, Geralt grunts visibly annoyed and walks past Jaskier, up the hill. 

“Why can't you ever do what you are told?!” he says as he turns to look at him. Jaskier stops in his tracks. True, he rarely does what he's told to do knowing that there are better options. Like when Geralt was trying to chase him away in the early years. Jaskier did the right thing, he decided to stay. 

"I am not a child, Geralt. I know exactly what's good for me, and that's not it.”

"Then you're an idiot. What's in my best interest is to get as far away from you as possible." Jaskier whimpers reluctantly, he might as well have run him through with his sword and thrown his body off the cliff. He can't help but feel like something insignificant, not worth holding on to even in hard times.

Geralt is on his way up again when Jaskier calls out to him. 

“Then, I gather it was in your best interest to let me kiss you, right, Geralt?” It's rare to take the witcher by surprise, much more so when it's Jaskier, but this time Geralt had to pause to take a breath and process the words, just as he would before confronting a monster "All those kisses I gave you at night, or holding hands for even a few minutes, were in your best interest, I suppose.” Jaskier adjusts his hair, not caring that the wind would ruffle it in a matter of seconds. The sun slowly dips below the mountains on the horizon, inking the sky a deep purple color that unfortunately reminds him of the witch who started this. Confident and resolute, he climbs up to face Geralt with the courage of a stupid rabbit in front of a wolf's mouth. "It's funny because I thought, silly old me, that they were about more than convenience, I even thought you enjoyed them." Geralt's lip lifts in an attempted snarl, and the truth was that all of Jaskier's instincts were telling him that he should flee, not because he was afraid of the witcher, but because it is the cunning thing to do.

"You thought wrong." 

read in ao3 here

[astaldis]

Witcher Cat Fics

Do you like cats and The Witcher? Then maybe you'll also like Witcher cat fics! (sorry, not Cat Witcher fics). Here is a little list of fics I found that feature cats, but it's certainly not complete. If you know of other Witcher fanfics where a cat plays an important role in the plot, please let me know so I can add it to the list.

Have fun with cats and Witchers!

(The order is totally random)

5 Times Someone Else Had To Watch The Damn Cat

Foltest, Ves, Geralt of Rivia, Iorveth, Silas of the Blue Stripes, G, 500 words:

Five times someone else had to watch Roche's cat.

It's the latest in a series of drabbles about Roche's cat: Kits Out for Temeria by Faetality, check it out, it's so funny!

The Sorceress' Challenge by Annaatemychocolate

Yennefer/Triss, F/F, 11,485 words:

“The Sorceress Yennefer has set a challenge: capture her black cat and retrieve the key around its neck before the end of the month, and you get your wish granted. That’s why everyone’s here.”

Triss’ eyebrows were now dangerously close to disappearing into her hairline. “You’re not serious.”

flowers in every room by SummerFrost

Geralt/Yennefer, Ciri, F/M, 5,077 words:

Hey, Mum! Sorry, I can't stay long, there's this—" Ciri tilts her head. "What's with the cat?"

"Fuck if I know," says Yen.

Aka: The one where Geralt gets turned into a cat and dumped on Yennefer's doorstep.

Here Kitty, Kitty by round_robin

Geralt & Jaskier, Gen, 1,671 words: “Cats don't like—you can't be serious.” Geralt said nothing and Jaskier gasped. “Of all the weird fucking things they did to you, that takes the cake.”

This got a small chuckle. “Oh yes? The heightened senses that bring headaches if I'm in a town too long, the poison tolerance that still hurts like I'm dying, but no, cats hissing at me is clearly the worst...”

Of Wolves and Cats by A_hopeful_disaster

Geralt &/ Jaskier, Gen, 1,353 words: Jaskier adopts a cat. Geralt isnt sure what to think.

The Mystical Divinity of Unashamed Felinity by Star_dancer54

Geralt & Jaskier, Gen, 2,778 words: It's a morning like any other when Geralt wakes up, until he discovers that Jaskier's been turned into a cat. (unfinished)

The Way to a Man's Heart Goes Through His... Cat? by Frywen

Geralt /Jaskier, Cirilla, Yennefer , M/M, 16,861 words: Jaskier is a live-in cat sitter and Roach is the biggest and meanest cat he has ever met. Just what kind of owner does a cat like that have? (unfinished)

Ball of Purr by kentucka

Geralt, Gen, 1,211 words: A fluffy little thing (pun intended) in which Geralt gets to pet a cat.

Cat Got Your Tongue (But I’ve Got Your Heart) by WanderingDrui

Aiden/Lambert, Geralt/Jaskier, M/M, 31,093 words: After the mountain Jaskier throws caution to the winds and decides to use a secret he's kept his entire life to get back at Geralt. He expects a short and petty journey of revenge. Instead he makes new witcher friends, explores his past, and finds peace with who he is and what he wants in life. Meanwhile, Geralt hasn't heard anything about Jaskier since he sent him away and is growing worried.... (WIP)

Lovecats by Lula_Claims_The_Snakeskin_Jacket

Cahir/Yennefer, F/M, 16,404 words: Cahir and Yennefer acquire a stray cat. Or does the cat acquire them? As a witch, Yennefer vibes with cats well. Cahir is sceptical, as to his best knowledge cats are of no use on the battlefield. Obviously, some tensions are inevitable here. But this relationship will, yes, evolve.

powerful by mayoho

Rience, Gen, 100 words: Rience has always been drawn to power, even in the most unexpected places.

Figs and black pepper by calvaria

Assire var Anahid, Merlin (the cat), Gen, 233 words: Assire prefers Merlin to all astrolabes, signs and pendulums.

Cat Comfort by Molanna

Cahir, Assire var Anahid, Merlin (the cat), Gen, 1,805 words: Merlin is not only suddenly brought to a different place by his Witch, but, when he comes back to the apartment late at night from exploring the new garden, he finds a stranger in the bed he is not sure how to feel about at first. (POV Merlin)

A Furry Foundling for the Bard by Molanna

Jaskier/Radovid, M/M, 1,111 words: Jaskier and Radovid are disturbed in their very enjoyable nightly activity by a strange, eerie sound. Luckily, what they find in the street is not a monster but a pleasant surprise.

A Fiery Night by Molanna

Jaskier/Radovid, M/M, 500 words: Jaskier and Radovid are having a great time together at Radovid's little island cottage. Unfortunately, one night, something goes very wrong.

Cat-Napping by Molanna

Rience, Gen, 500 words: Unexpectedly and totally against his will, Rience ends up with a fluffy tabby cat napping in his lap.

[ghostinthelibrarywrites]

23 for any combination of geraskefer please? 💖

23. Cold feet warming each other up under the blanket

Geralt is nearly back to camp, holding a werewolf’s severed head in each hand, when Jaskier’s shriek cuts through the stillness of the night. Dropping the heads to the ground, Geralt starts to draw his sword, only pausing when Jaskier shrieks again and he notices that the sound is entirely lacking in fear.

“How are your feet so fucking cold?” the bard whines. “Ye gods, is your icy heart spreading to other parts of your body now?”

There’s only one person who brings out such dramatics in Jaskier. Jaskier was alone at camp when Geralt left to hunt the werewolves, but Yennefer must have portaled in to join him at some point. Too pleased to be truly annoyed by the shrieking—though he can't count how many times he's told Jaskier not to start screaming unless there's actual danger—Geralt retrieves the dropped heads.

“Yes, that’s exactly it.” Yennefer’s voice is quieter, but still audible to Geralt’s witcher hearing. “It has nothing to do with the fact that it’s almost winter.”

“Stop pressing them against me!”

“You’re warm.”

“Yes, and I’d like to stay that way, thank you. Is this your plan to finally do me in? Will Geralt return to find me blue-lipped and silent, frozen to a block of ice?”

“He should be so lucky.”

With a snort, Geralt resumes his trudge towards camp.

“I offer you the warmth of my body,” Jaskier says with the gravity of Lebioda facing his final martyrdom. “And in return, I’m treated like… ack, Yennefer, are you well? I don’t think feet are supposed to get that cold.”

“And I don’t think anyone is supposed to get so annoying, and yet here you are.”

“It’s an art that I take—Yennefer, your hands are worse! How are your hands worse? What sorcery is this?”

“I don’t know what you’re whining about.” Yennefer sounds smug. “I’m comfortable.”

“Dreadful, horrible, blood-sucking…”

Geralt clears the trees and finds the two of them curled together on Geralt and Jaskier’s pushed-together bedrolls, cocooned in enough blankets to keep a small village warm, even though the night is mild for being past Saovine. Despite his protests, Jaskier has Yennefer wrapped up in his arms, doing little to hide how pleased he is. From the musky scent in the air, they’ve been busy while Geralt was gone.

“Geralt!” Jaskier looks up at Geralt with beseeching eyes. “Oh, thank the gods, my savior. Yennefer is freezing me to death with her horrid paws. I’m seconds from expiring of hypothermia.”

“Hm. From the way you were shrieking, I thought another werewolf got you.”

“At least werewolves are warm and fuzzy.”

“You’re fuzzy enough for both of us, bardling,” Yennefer grumbles.

“Oh, don’t pretend you don’t like it.”

Geralt pats Roach’s neck—she, at least, is being quiet and well-behaved—and starts shucking off his armor. “Now you know how I feel all the times you decide to use me to warm your hands and feet, bard.”

Jaskier gasps. “But you have witcher body heat! Surely, you aren’t selfish enough to keep it to yourself.”

“I’ve been letting you use my body heat for twenty years, Jaskier. Doesn’t mean having your cold fucking feet against my legs feels good.”

Yennefer guffaws. “So you have cold feet and you snore, bardling. What a prize you are.”

“I do not snore!”

“You do,” Geralt and Yennefer say at the same time. To Yennefer, Geralt adds, “First time I shared a bedroll with him, I thought a grave hag had slipped into bed with me during the night when I woke up and felt his feet against my shins.”

“I can see how you could make that mistake,” she says.

Jaskier yowls in protest, wiggling away from her the best he can while wrapped from chin to toes in blankets. “Unhand me, you cold-hearted harpy! You can’t slander me and then use my body to warm the icy depths of your soul, you fiend.”

Shaking his head, Geralt slides onto the bedroll behind Jaskier, slipping under the blankets and putting his arm around Jaskier and Yennefer’s waists, pulling Jaskier flush against him. Jaskier gives a token grumble of protest, then melts back into him.

“Thank the gods,” Jaskier breathes. “Geralt, your witcher warmth saves the day again. Now I may not freeze to death during the night.”

“I’m going to portal you to an iceberg somewhere,” Yennefer says.

“I don’t think I’d notice the difference.”

“You both have fucking cold feet,” Geralt says. “Now go to sleep.”

He’s unsurprised to find four icy feet pressed against his shins and thighs.

“Hers are colder, right, Geralt?” Jaskier asks in a stage whisper.

“Maybe,” Geralt grumbles. “But she doesn’t snore.”

He drifts off to sleep to the familiar sound of Yennefer laughing while their bard squawks in outrage.

Twenty-four touches prompts

Tag list: @kueble @mollymawkwrites @feral-jaskier @geraltrogerericduhautebellegarde @dawnofbards @thisislisa @tsukiwolf42 @mosaicscale @rockysstupidity @fontegagrilledcheese @kuripon @help-i-need-a-cool-username @julek @flowercrown-bard @eveljerome

[buckera]

2023 Writing Round-Up 💫

• 15 fics / 138.6k words posted; out of which 8 fics / 67.8k were buddie

Phew, it's been such a productive year, especially the second half, thank you for everyone who tagged along for the ride!! 🤗

(also I'm doing it in reverse order because... well if you know, you know 😪)

•December•

we’ve got something permanent (i mean in the way we care) [buddie, 7.1k, Explicit]

Buck has baby fever and it’s Eddie’s job to give him what he wants. Kind of.

Keep My Heart Warm In Yours [buddie, 18.5k, Mature]

Christopher decides that he wants to go skiing, Buck makes it happen and the cabin at the foot of the mountains turns out to be quite the romantic backdrop for their little getaway.

Of Love, Hospital Jitters And Christmas Lights [buddie, 6.3k, Teen + Up]

Eddie and Buck end up in the hospital waiting room a few days before Christmas.

You Ring, I Drool [buddie, 8.6k, Explicit]

5+1 times Buck reminds Eddie of a dog // alternatively; the one in which Eddie accidentally conditions Buck to beg for treats

If This Is What The Season Is Bringing [buddie, 2k, Teen + Up]

Buck and Eddie made a promise after Eddie decided to leave the 118 and they finally make good on it this Christmas.

•November•

Out Of Order, Still In Line [buddie, 6.2k, Explicit]

When Buck finally gets to the Clinic, the long awaited release doesn’t seem to come; cue Eddie to the rescue.

'Cause I'm still seeing colours that are red (If I close my chest and let it take me) [steddie, 11.4k, Explicit]

Ever since they came back from the Upside Down, Steve has been struggling on rainy days, but Eddie’s there to provide support and a maybe even a little more than that. - Project #182 of Steddie Bigbang 2023

How It Was Meant To Be [steddie, <1k, Gen]

Steve's casually calling Eddie 'baby' all the time, without even registering what he’s doing.

•October•

I Was Betting On Forever (But Forever Comes And Goes) [buddie, 4k, Teen + Up]

Eddie gets a call from Buck in the middle of the night and it’s about as bad as one would expect.

It gets better, it gets worse [steddie, 52.7k, Explicit]

Steve tried to tell Eddie how he felt, only to get shut down immediately. Now meeting for the first time in a year, they have to figure out how to be around each other.

Coming On Ever So Strong / Coming Off Ever So Soft [buddie, 14.7k, Explicit]

They get drunk, Eddie makes a move and then there is the next morning.

•July•

But where they lay, they cannot stay [radskier, 4.3k, Explicit]

Jaskier comes to Tretogor and meets Radovid for the first time in months, but their reunion is bittersweet given how much everything has changed since they’ve last seen each other.

•May•

Helping hands (are better than praying lips) [steddie, 5.5k, Explicit]

Eddie breaks his arms and Steve is on nurse duty. [cw for watersports]

•February•

Who we are in the dark [steddie, 3.4k, Explicit]

It's their first anniversary and they go to the cinema.

•January•

It might walk like a duck [steddie, 10k, Explicit]

Eddie Munson is a busy man, busy enough to have a planner. Steve misses his friend so he hijacks said planner, learning something unexpected in the process.

Aaand that's all, folks! 💛 Now, here are some tags:

I was tagged by the lovely @wikiangela and @jamespearce9-1-1 thank you~ 💛

(these guys went in so early and I left it for the last minute lmao but just in case you missed their round-ups, you can read them: here and here)

✨tagging (if you've already done it, no worries and still no pressure otherwise either): @malewifediaz @spagheddiediaz @jeeyuns @eddiebabygirldiaz @hippolotamus @daffi-990 @disasterbuckdiaz @nmcggg @thewolvesof1998 @watchyourbuck @theotherbuckley @fortheloveofbuddie @ladydorian05 @rainbow-nerdss

[wren-of-the-woods]

I hear you're where to go for Witcher fic recs! How about some with Geralt being protective over Jaskier? Shippy, if you can find any, but I wouldn't mind platonic! I just want Geralt to look out for his bard. Thank you for your time!

Hello!! Here's what I've got! There's a wide variety of settings and levels of angst, so hopefully there should be something for everone :D

As always, please feel free to add more recs or promote your own work in the notes!

~

Don't Leave Me by @geraskierficrecs (Rated M, 6.2k)

Jaskier’s hands tighten around Geralt before slowly losing their grip, spasming where they fall limp. “Ger--geralt--” “Don’t you dare,” he snarls back, “Don’t you dare try to give me your fucking goodbyes. You are not dying.” “S--silly man.” Jaskier’s smile is full of painful fondness. “Would you fight death for me?” Geralt swings him up into his arms and nearly weeps at the sound of familiar hooves running in his direction. “Every. Fucking. Time.”

If You Give a Bard a Lute by @ghostinthelibrarywrites (Rated T, 10k)

After Jaskier’s father disowns him, confiscates all his possessions— including Filavandrel’s lute— and kicks him out with nothing but the clothes on his back, Jaskier spends a long, hungry winter barely surviving. When he reunites with Geralt in the spring, his witcher is determined to get his lute back, even if it means recruiting his fellow witchers to stage a heist.

Wild Blue Yonder by @jaskierswolf (Rated T, 5.3k)

Geralt's bookshop is slowly falling apart and he's ready to give up when Jaskier wanders into the store

remember me I sing by @echo-bleu (Rated G, 3.1k - also includes Yennnefer)

Filavandrel's gift was so much more than a simple lute. It seemed fitting, that Jaskier’s soul would be made of wood and strings and beautiful sounds. The problem is that now Rience has his lute and is threatening to burn it if they don't hand over Ciri. And Jaskier has never told anyone that his very life is tied to his beloved instrument.

This Is How I Disappear by @stacyholmes (Rated T, 5.4k)

Jaskier keeps texting unknown number. Geralt keeps reading said texts without answering.

The Footsteps We Follow by thiswildheart (Rated T, 16.5k)

Look, Jaskier's got a lot going on. He's painfully aware that there are cataclysmic events happening and that the troubled teenager he knows might save the world or speed along the end of days. He's also in love with a man who's never even admitted that they're friends, which is almost as bad. Oh, and he's still working as the Sandpiper, only now a terrifying eldritch creature has entrusted him with the Song of the Seven to give hope to the elves and help them fight back against their oppression. It's probably the bravest thing he's ever done, but not everyone sees it that way. Luckily he knows some people who excel at last minute rescues. ... then he just has to figure out how to tell Geralt why so many people are trying to kill him. This is going to go great.

Getting Warmer (orphaned) (Rated T, 8.2k) 

Injured and freezing after a kikimora hunt gone wrong, Geralt and Jaskier must wait out a thunderstorm at the bottom of a cliff, huddling for warmth. It is here that Geralt finally confronts his feelings for the bard.

Jaskier and Mountains Just Don't Mix by C4t1l1n4 (Rated G, 3.8k)

Despite the other Witchers' positive reaction to Geralt's bard, Vesemir is reluctant to have a human stay with them at Kaer Morhen so Jaskier attempts to leave and ends up almost freezing to death on the side of the mountain. Hypothermia fic

Immediately, I Love Him (He's Doing His Best) by @hum-my-name (Rated G, 26.5k)

"In which Greg is some sort of guardian angel, I don't know" <><> A few days ago, Joey Batey did an interview in which he created a lovely little character named Greg. A few days ago, I decided to write a cute little thing about Greg and Jaskier being the best of friends throughout the years, with a dash of Geralt and Jaskier friendship as a treat. 13k words later, here we are. Enjoy.

Broken Mirror by happy_hermit (Rated G, 2.1k) 

To Geralt’s credit, he waits until they’re well away from Kaer Morhen to ask the question. He also waits until Yennefer and Ciri have gone to bed, which makes the whole thing feel a bit too calculated for Jaskier’s liking, which is to say that he doesn’t like it at all. “Where’s your lute, Jaskier?” Jaskier doesn’t quite flinch, though his heart does something of the sort all on its own. It is very much a wound that hasn’t healed; as is most of him, these days.

Echo by @kingthunder (Rated E, 29.5k)

Jaskier loses his voice the morning after a concert. As he and Geralt find new ways to fill the silence between them, they realize it isn't only Jaskier's voice that's been lost—and getting it back will bring them closer than they've ever been before.

If There's Any Sleep At Night by @smolalienbee (Rated T, 22.8k)

The mare is but a silhouette of a human and yet at his words something passes through her expression - whether it’s surprise, joy, fear, Geralt doesn’t know. But it’s clear that what he said has struck her in some way. (“She is not some mindless monster, Geralt.” He remembers Jaskier’s words.) A mare, also known as a mara or a zmora - a malicious entity, a bringer of nightmares and a demon of the night. An easy enough contract to fulfill, if only frustrating, or at least that’s what Geralt believes when he first sets out to hunt down one such mare. What he doesn’t expect is to be wrapped up in a tale of a wronged soul, of love and of joy.

Also, because I'm not above reccing my own fics, here's a few I've written!

Wash Away the Blood and Tears by me (Rated T, 1.8k)

Jaskier re-injures his fingers while distracting Nilfgaard from Ciri. Afterward, Geralt volunteers to help wash his hair. Or: In which Jaskier gets a bath and a nap, and Geralt gets a new role in the group.

We'll Build a Den Out of Pillows (And Get Drunk Again) by me (Rated G, 2k)

Jaskier gets sick. When Geralt asks how to help, Jaskier jokingly suggests that he build a pillow fort. He does not expect Geralt to take it seriously. Geralt takes it seriously.

~

If you want more, there’s a Protective Geralt tag on AO3 that I’m sure has many lovely works I haven’t read!

(You can also find my other reclists here)

[kingthunder]

Analysis of Jaskier's songs from s1—

—and how they reflect the narrative events and Jaskier's character arc through the show. I'm trying to keep this as canon as possible and not look at it through shipping goggles, but there is textual stuff about Jaskier's relationship with and love for Geralt that's impossible to ignore.

Toss a Coin to Your Witcher: Jaskier’s first big break, the famous and famously annoying Toss a Coin. He wrote this when he was around eighteen and it definitely feels immature. He’s cracking bad jokes like “elf on a shelf” (god I hate that one, it grates me every time) and substituting “bleat” for “beat.” He’s taking enormous creative liberties with facts. And he’s being a little thoughtless; in his enthusiasm to hero-wash Geralt, he’s throwing elves under the bus, calling them devils and pests while he’s talking about Geralt as a friend to “humanity.” (more about this when we get into some of his later songs and his time as the Sandpiper)

This is an upbeat, catchy (and kind of shallow) song that I mentally classify as one of his “narrative” songs. It tells a story. It feels optimistic, much like Jaskier himself at this point in his life. After all, this is the kid who saw a big scary witcher brooding in a corner and decided that nothing could go wrong by following him around. He’s got a head full of heroics and heartbreak and nothing is going to dissuade him, not even being nearly killed. This song is a perfect time capsule of the beginning of Jaskier’s career and also the beginning of his long-running relationship with Geralt.

The Fishmonger’s Daughter: Jaskier plays this at Calanthe’s court when she orders him to play “a jig.” It seems like a pretty typical bawdy tavern song, the kind where you try to drum up audience participation. Most of the court seems to know it and sing along with it. No idea if Jaskier wrote this himself. He probably didn’t. It seems like one of those songs that everyone just knows.

Her Sweet Kiss: This song makes me feel deranged. This is definitely a Jaskier original. We see him writing and noodling with it at the beginning of The Mountain (tm) and asking other people if his lyrics are scanning well. He’s been traveling with Geralt on and off for about twenty years now, so he’s forty years old or close to it. He’s seen some shit, and part of the shit he’s seen has been Geralt and Yennefer’s relationship. He is not a fan. He is so deeply not a fan that he’s writing a whole song about it. But also? He’s putting himself in the song too, and he’s putting his heart on his sleeve, the same way that he tries to do when he talks to Geralt about going to the coast. The lyrics of this song are about three people—a man (Geralt), a woman (Yennefer), and the singer (Jaskier). It’s about how the woman is bad for the man, and how much the singer loves the man.

Whether you see Jaskier’s feelings for Geralt as romantic or not, these are the facts:

He doesn’t like Yennefer or think that she’s good for Geralt, and says so, repeatedly, both in casual conversation and in his music. In the song, he writes, “She’s always bad news, it’s always lose-lose” and that, “She’ll destroy with her sweet kiss.” 

In the song, Jaskier calls Geralt “my love” and says, “I’m weak, my love, and I am wanting.”

He asks Geralt to go to the coast with him, so they can “work out what pleases” them. He wants them to stay together and not go their separate ways like they often do.

Immediately after this plea, Geralt goes straight to Yennefer and (just in case anyone was doubting that Her Sweet Kiss was about the three of them) Geralt and Yennefer fuck while an instrumental version of Her Sweet Kiss plays over the sex. I still can’t believe the showrunners did that. That was A Damn Choice. (deranged, I am deranged about everything about this)

The kicker is that the song wasn’t even finished when Geralt flipped his lid and shouted Jaskier off The Mountain (tm) and out of his life. Which means that Jaskier, alone and heartbroken (his own words from s2), finished this song and published it afterwards, even knowing that the entire situation had gone tits up and that he might not even see Geralt or Yennefer again. Maybe it gave him some catharsis to sing it, who knows.

This isn’t a shallow catchy tune like Toss a Coin or even Fishmonger’s Daughter. It’s deeply personal and a tonal shift from his previous music.

(and it makes me deranged)

Stay tuned for my season 2 thoughts!

[roughentumble]

anyway the royal woman "explains" everything to geralt, and suddenly he feels like an outsider all over again. he doesnt understand anything on land, all he's doing is holding jaskier back from his future. he feels stupid, for ever dreaming of a cottage by the sea with a prince. he decides to leave. jaskier sees him go, but isnt fast enough to stop him, is only fast enough to see a flash of scales as geralt regains his tail and hides away at the bottom of the sea.

jaskier visits the beach every day, hoping for geralt to come back, now that he knows geralt isnt just his friend, but also his handsome rescuer. and geralt knows because he hides by the dock, hoping to see jaskier finally moving on. but he doesnt.

geralt hides. he stays hidden. it's what's best for everyone, he reasons. he cries, merfolk tears turning to jewels on his cheeks. he feels foolish. he feels like he'll cry himself a whole new ocean.

he collects them all, takes them to yen to trade. they're very powerful and very rare, after all, a sea witch could do a lot with them. he manages to communicate to her-- his legs are gone but the deal still holds, he traded his voice-- that jaskier stays on the shore, that he cant live his life there. he wants yen to use her magic to make him leave, so he can move on and be happy with his fiancee. she considers his deal, then tells him to visit the beach in three days, when the sun is high overhead. she takes the gems.

she finds jaskier there. on the beach. and she makes him a deal, too. come to the beach in three day's time, when the sun is high and only when it's high, wearing two shirts and two pants. and he'll get the answer he seeks. he asks why she's doing this for him, and she says she's simply an interested party. and who is he to look a gift horse in the mouth?

when geralt arrives, the beach is empty. blessedly empty. his heart aches, because belonging and joy and a future has fled him, but at least jaskier can move on. he lays his head on the sand and rests.

a hand grabs his arm, tight. tight enough he cant slip away. his head jerks up and he sees jaskier, standing there, clinging to him like a lifeline. "geralt! it's you, it's really you! why did you leave me?" he begs

geralt twists and squirms, but he doesnt want to hurt jaskier, and he's at a disadvantage on his belly in the sand. it comes out, eventually. he signs that jaskier has a life. a future. "you cant stay on this beach forever. you have a fiancee. you'll be king." his face is screwed up in agony.

"oh geralt," he says, pets geralt's hair, pushes it out of his face. "that's not true at all." geralt's head whips around to stare at him. "im not engaged to anyone. and im too far down the line to gain the throne. what made you think that?"

geralt feels dumbfounded. betrayed. unthinkably foolish. "i dont understand." he signs, because he doesnt. he doesnt understand kings and princes and being the 8th son, he doesnt understand jaskier's eldest brother has a brood of children of his own, all of them more ready for the throne than jaskier will ever be. jaskier tries to explain, but mostly what it makes geralt get is that he was lied to, and he bought it. he wants to bury himself in the sand.

"geralt, darling, who told you all this? why did you think i was leaving you?" and geralt tells him, tells him about the royal who misled him, who wanted jaskier's hand and his position. and jaskier's face grows dark. "no. no, i wasnt promised to her. and i certainly never will be, now."

geralt's head is spinning. "it doesnt matter," he signs, "it's too late. you cant live your life stuck on this beach. i gave up my legs."

jaskier shakes his head. "of course i can. who cares about that?" jaskier says, breathless, "i always wanted a cottage by the sea."

and geralt cant help himself. he surges forward, lips meeting jaskier's. jaskier holds him tight, cradling his face so sweetly. its everything they wanted but have been denying themselves for so long

geralt doesnt know how, but when he pulls away he /knows/. he can feel it in his throat. merfolk sing to communicate, and he thinks back, remembers the tune they'd been singing on the ship before it capsized all that time ago. twists the words to make it his own he sings soft and sweet, a low murmur; "my heart is pierced by cupid / i disdain all glittering gold / there is nothing can console me / but my jolly sailor bold"

jaskier gapes at him. "his eyes are ocean waters / and his hair is like a foal's / i will follow where he leads me / wherever he may go"

"you-- your voice-- geralt, how" he starts, heart beating out of his chest, and geralt just shakes his head

"i have no idea. i just knew it was back."

"took you long enough to figure it out." yen says, and they both whip around to stare. she lounges back against the dock like she hasnt a care in the world. "honesty was all you needed to get back your voice."

"you set me up." geralt says, because she did.

"and it worked out for you." yen says, because it did.

"you know the sea witch?" jaskier asks, and they both snort.

"we're on again off again." yen replies dryly, "though it seems off again for the forseeable future." just to make them both turn red.

she removes a bottle from the bag she has slung around her hips. she holds it out to him. her eyes are softer then before. "merfolk tears. a powerful ingredient. since i did no magic here, i figure you could take back half the payment." geralt looks shocked. "plus a few other ingredients."

he takes it from her carefully. "you wont be a merfolk with legs if you drink this." she warns him. "you'll be human. your tail, your gills, the depths of the sea, will be lost to you forever. no going back."

he thinks about it for all of a few seconds before tilting his head back and swallowing it all. "that's what i figured." yen says quietly, a soft smile playing on her lips.

it hurts worse than the last time. scales slough off in so much bloody viscera, and jaskier's eyes well with tears as he holds geralt through it. yen stays for it all.

when it ends, finally, with geralt whole and human in jaskier's lap. there are scars on his legs, starting at his feet and running in a straight line all the way up to his crotch, as if his fin had been ripped in half. but he's whole, and he's human, and he kisses jaskier again. and again, and again, and again.

when they part for air, jaskier panting and geralt naked as the day he was born, jaskier's face lights up and he says "oh! that's why you told me to wear two!" he peels off one of two shirts to give to geralt, who looks at him quizzically. "i thought it was a magic thing, you sneak."

"it's a sort of magic." yen says, smiling slyly. "just remember, geralt-- you owe me for this." he nods in agreement, and she slinks back to the depths, the air too dry for her to stand much longer.

jaskier lends geralt a pair of pants as well, too tight but better than nothing. they walk back to the castle together, hand in hand. and in a few years' time, they get that cottage by the sea

[samstree]

in other words (please be true)

A secret santa gift for dear @lamberts, hope your year is full of good sleep and love! 💖 (2.2k ☆ AO3)

“Jaskier,” Geralt says with his eyes closed.

“Hmm?” A slight shuffle, the sound of Jaskier burrowing into the cover.

“Go to sleep.”

A puff of breath ghosts over Geralt’s cheeks. The pillow under his ear is soft, a nice spot to stay forever like this.

“I am,” Jaskier answers, carefully.

“Your eyes are still open.” Geralt doesn’t even need to look to know, with Jaskier’s gaze on the back of his eyes.

“They’re not,” Jaskier lies again with a smile in his voice.

Sighing, Geralt leans forward to press a kiss to Jaskier’s forehead, down his eyebrow, and then lightly, on the tip of his nose. He rests a hand over Jaskier’s back, patting a gentle rhythm. It’s a trick he’s learned to get Ciri to fall asleep quickly.

Jaskier sinks into the bed further, but Geralt can practically hear the sound of him blinking. The feeling of being closely observed by Jaskier is not a bad one. It’s just a small weight of attention, a warm tingling on his senses, a safe kind of being seen.

Still, the subtle hint of exhaustion threads into the thrumming of Jaskier’s heartbeat, just on the edge of too light and too quick.

“It’s late, and you are tired,” Geralt shushes again under his breath. “Close your eyes.”

“They are closed.”

Shamelessly, Jaskier keeps looking, so Geralt lets him for a few moments longer.

The fire crackles as Geralt keeps his eyes shut—opening them would mean admitting defeat. He’d be giving up on the attempt to sleep, and he’s reluctant to do so just because Jaskier wants to be a cheeky liar.

Without looking, he can picture Jaskier perfectly—lying on his side, face only inches away. The night is dark, and so are Jaskier’s eyes, peeking from under the covers with his face hidden. Age has never taken away that mischievous glint in those eyes, nor the overflowing adoration resting in the crow’s feet at Jaskier’s temple. Without looking, Geralt knows he’s being seen with love.

His lungs expand, filled with the familiar scent of Jaskier, and then, he opens his eyes.

There Jaskier is, safe in their bed, the lower half of his face hidden under the cover. The smile is unmistakable when his eyes are curved like this, showing those beautiful crow’s feet. Upon seeing Geralt is wide awake, his eyes light up even more, nearly gleaming with excitement in the dim firelight.

“Oops,” Jaskier murmurs. “You’ve caught me.”

“As if you regret it.”

“Who says I don’t?”

Letting out a deep breath, Geralt searches for Jaskier’s hand under the covers, his limbs all slow and lazy, heavy from a day’s journey. Jaskier meets him halfway, links their fingers together and brings Geralt’s hand to his lips.

“Hey,” Geralt greets him as if they didn’t say goodnight mere minutes ago. A content hum rumbles quietly as his hand is being kissed.

“Hey,” Jaskier greets him in return.

They lie there, blinking slowly in the warm nest of their bed. There are faint bruises under Jaskier’s eyes from days of traveling. He truly is exhausted, and Geralt’s heart twists in sympathy.

“The only thing you’ll regret tomorrow is the lack of sleep.” He squeezes Jaskier’s hand in worry. “Come on, stop staring.”

Jaskier only shakes his head. “No.”

“Jask.”

“I didn’t ride for days just to not look at your face, witcher.” Jaskier’s lips purse into a displeased line. “I’ve waited for months. Months, Geralt. Do you know how long they last when you are away?”

Geralt is too aware, because those months stretched out in Jaskier’s absence as if they’d never end. The empty bedroll beside him grew cold every morning when he reached out, but he kept reaching anyway.

“So you’ve decided to never take your eyes off of me again?” Geralt asks. “Even at night, just to make up for those months?”

“You tease me for missing you.” Jaskier pouts, wounded as if he’s suffered great unfairness.

“I tease you for being unreasonable.”

Geralt wraps an arm behind Jaskier’s back again and begins running soothing circles, inching forward until Jaskier fits into the curve of his body.

“Perhaps I am,” Jaskier whispers, his breath warm against Geralt’s neck. “When we were apart, I’d close my eyes and picture all the details of your face. I was quite proud for remembering well, but my imagination could never compare. You see, you’ve changed in my absence.”

“I did?”

“Mm-hmm.” Jaskier touches his forehead to Geralt’s in confirmation. “You always change when I’m not there. I merely wanted to record the differences for my imagination. So next time, I’ll be more accurate.”

Geralt aches at the thought of separating from Jaskier again. “You understand we need to part, do you? Between your job and mine, it’s the way it is.”

Jaskier swallows. “Yes, for a few years at least. We have our plan, so I understand. Doesn’t make it easier.”

With that, Jaskier looks down at where their hands link. For the first time, a real sense of tiredness weighs on his frame, shrinking his presence, and it makes Geralt feel wrong-footed in a million ways. It just won’t do. Geralt hates it when Jaskier takes up less space.

“No. It’s never easy,” Geralt agrees, rather urgently. “It’s the same for me. I…I’d pretend you were with me too.”

“You would?”

Geralt nods. “Our bedroll felt too big. I kept trying to find you at night, only to remember you weren’t there. Even Roach sensed I was sad.”

“Oh,” Jaskier breathes. “I’m so sorry.”

“No, I am. Shouldn’t have made fun of you.” Geralt pulls Jaskier closer to lay on his shoulder, securing the comfortable weight of his bard at his side.

“You can’t stop making fun of me even if you wanted to. I don’t know why I’m sweet on you,” Jaskier mumbles into Geralt’s shirt. “Perhaps I shall forget about your face altogether and let you suffer in unrequited longing.”

With a huff, Geralt pulls away, wrapping a hand around Jaskier’s chin. “My, my, have mercy. I won’t survive.”

“So you’ll let me stare now?” Jaskier perks up, his face open and earnest. “I don’t ask for more, only a few stolen moments at night.”

Jaskier still talks about Geralt’s love as if it is something he cheated out of the universe, as if he can only steal moments of affection in the darkness of the night. Even after all these years, he treats Geralt like it’s a privilege to love him, to be loved by him.

Suddenly, he never wants Jaskier to stop looking.

“Stare all you want,” he answers. “Look all you want. Remember all of me, but know you can ask for more. Always.”

Jaskier’s eyes crinkle with a coy smile, the lower half of his face swallowed by the soft cover once again. “Always is a long time. I’d never sleep if you kept letting me get my way. You’d be dealing with a cranky, sleep-deprived bard every morning.”

“Hmm. A compromise, perhaps,” Geralt says. “A deal. Look all you want, but if you sleep early enough, I’ll get you those strawberry tarts you like in the morning.”

“With honey tea?”

“With honey tea,” Geralt confirms. “You can stay here comfortably, with your tea and breakfast. It’ll also be snowing in the morning, I can smell it in the air.”

“Oh,” Jaskier breathes hopefully, “you know I cannot refuse a lazy morning in bed. With snow, no less. This is the highest form of bribery, I’ll have you know. It’s put me in a rather difficult position.”

“Look your fill, bard.” Geralt raises his eyebrows, his hand sneaking up Jaskier’s back again, patting gently. “I won’t mind, but think of the price you’ll be paying.”

Jaskier squints, studying Geralt with a wicked look.

“There is one thing different about you, now that I’m paying attention,” he says. “You’ve grown cunning while I wasn’t here. It’s not a good look, darling. I liked it better when I could get away with anything.”

“I learned it from the best.” A human’s heartbeat thrums under a witcher’s callused fingertips, and Geralt keeps his touch patient. “What else is different about me?”

Jaskier reaches out for the stray hair at Geralt’s temple. “Lots of things. Your hair, for one. It was too short when we parted. Kept getting into your eyes. Now, I think I can braid it again.”

“In the morning, then,” Geralt offers another bribery. “And?”

“You have a new scar. Right here, by your collarbone. Is it a scratch? A vicious beast, perhaps?”

“The most vicious.” Geralt winces. “A stray cat by the road.”

Jaskier gasps, soothing the claw marks, hissing in sympathy. “What? Have you still not given up on petting them? Geralt, you know they attack witchers on sight!”

The orange little thing liked Roach fine, purring and rolling by her feet in the sunbeam, so Geralt made the mistake of letting down his guard too soon. It’s been a century of feline injuries; he really should have learned.

“I’ll live, Jask. Don’t you fret.” He catches Jaskier’s hand and kisses his palm. “Anything else?”

“Hmm, let’s see. I don’t see other signs of your foolishness.” Jaskier recoils a little when Geralt’s stubble scratches the sensitive skin of his wrist. “Except you are not taking care of yourself again, despite all my nagging letters. You know I love your face as it is, dearest, but this beard needs some upkeep.” His voice drops to seriousness, a hint of worry hanging by his pursed lips. “You’ve also gotten thin, just a little bit.”

Jaskier looks saddened by the thought, his fingers now tracing the sharp lines of Geralt’s cheekbone.

“You know how winters are,” Geralt says, his chest warm from the sense of being protected. It’s a rare feeling, but here Jaskier is, fussing over a witcher who is only meant to protect others.

“I know it gets like this. But again, it doesn’t make it easier.”

Jaskier sighs, brows knitted and deep in thoughts. They are no doubt thoughts of pampering Geralt over the entire winter now that they are together. He’d be mentally arranging all those sweet treats Geralt likes, or even contemplating cooking by himself again. Hopefully not—the kitchen can’t take another burning.

It’s too ridiculous a sight, Jaskier exhausted with dark circles under his eyes, worrying over Geralt’s missed meal or two.

“Hey,” Geralt calls out, interrupting. “I know something hasn’t changed.”

“Hmm?”

He always knows another trick to put Jaskier to sleep.

With their bodies tangled up and breaths mingling, Geralt kisses Jaskier sweetly and lazily. He sets a languid pace, a gentle exploration, a quiet homecoming. They exchange soft hums between pleasant teasing, but it never goes beyond what it is. Geralt simply kisses Jaskier, coaxing him to lie back and bask in the attention.

“Is it the same?” Geralt breathes, pressing another small kiss on Jaskier’s grin.

“Better, even.” Jaskier blinks slowly, his eyelids growing heavy despite the grin on his face. “Something else hasn’t changed.”

“Oh?”

“The way you look at me.”

Geralt runs his fingers through Jaskier’s hair, studying the light fluttering of his lashes in the dim light. He’s looking right into all that is kind in the world, all that is his.

“And how do I look at you?” Geralt asks.

“Like I’m a secret you get to keep,” Jaskier answers.

For a moment, the world disappears and all that’s left is them, being here, a secret Geralt never thought he could keep.

Jaskier’s hand falls next to the pillow, where Geralt threads their fingers together. He’s almost entirely resting on top of Jaskier, but he knows the weight is welcomed. It makes Jaskier feel safe enough to be humming that pleasant sound, and most importantly, it makes Jaskier sleepy.

“My secret. Mine. How did that happen?” Geralt muses as Jaskier lets out a yawn. He chuckles. “You know, we can always pick this up tomorrow.”

Under him, Jaskier is all sprawled out and squirming, pressed into the mattress and melted into a puddle of contentment.

“Not tomorrow, no. More kisses for me…right now.”

“Hmm, another deal, then.” Geralt smiles wickedly, resting his head on the pillow, studying Jaskier’s silhouette. “More kisses, but only tomorrow morning. I’ll kiss you more when I have the strawberry tarts.”

A sad whine escapes Jaskier’s throat, but there is no fight behind the drowsiness. “Sabotage on top of bribery, depriving me of kisses. You are truly too cunning.”

“You can complain tomorrow.”

“And feed you strawberry tarts too.” Jaskier yawns again. “Must feed you treats. Keep you happy and healthy.”

“Tomorrow,” Geralt promises, watching Jaskier’s eyes flutter shut, his mouth going slack. The quietness stretches on with only the fire crackling. The shadows dance around Jaskier’s features, warming his round cheeks, the rise and fall of his chest evening out.

It’s like Geralt could stay here all night, just counting all the ways Jaskier is safe and happy and comfortable.

“Your eyes are still open,” Jaskier whispers under his breath, half asleep.

“They are not,” Geralt lies.

“Liar.”

A small smile tugs at Jaskier’s lips as he drifts off. He lets out soft snores soon after, his pinkie still hooked with Geralt’s thumb.

Geralt stays there for just a while longer, reveling in not having to reach out for cold, empty sheets, and in not having to miss Jaskier like there is a bard-shaped emptiness in his heart.

He sleeps, knowing he won’t need to miss Jaskier for a while longer, knowing in the morning, he will have sweet treats to buy and his bard to kiss awake.

[wyrm-mlm]

Yooooo I just had an idea for a modern Witcher AU that has latched my brain and won’t let go so I gotta just get it out:

Kaer Mohren Animal Hospital

Geralt, Lambert and Eskel all grew up, adopted by Vesemir and somehow all became Veterinarians. Then they decided to open an animal hospital together

Eskel is usually who you see if you bring in a cat or dog, handling the general practice. He’s kind with animals and people alike, sitting with clients as long as it takes to make sure they understand everything.

Lambert takes care of exotics, the weirder the better to him. If Eskel’s schedule is tight he’ll examine a dog or two but he refuses to work with cats. They hate him, he’s sure.

Geralt is usually on the road, tending to livestock. Horses are his favorite of course, and he has some of his own. When he’s at the clinic he will see dogs and cats too.

Yennifer is the lead Tech. She’s hard on her techs but they all know she does it for the good of the animals. She’s not great with clients.

Triss is basically her right hand and takes over if it’s Yen’s day off. She’s great with people and is usually the one to take scheduled euthanasias. It takes a lot out of her but she pretends it doesn’t effect her.

Letho is the muscle, and usually tags along with Geralt to help restraint with larger animals. He tends to intimidate people in the clinic so he’s happy to stay on the road most the time.

Coen is also the muscle but tends to stay at the clinic as he’s better with people. He can get a mastiff on the surgery table with little help. Though it’s catching up to him and he has chronic back pain. He has a hard time asking for help. Yen tends to scold him for that.

Iorveth runs a wildlife rehabilitation center and often brings in things to Lambert. They have to make sure his appointments are on different days from Roche(who helps Foltest with his show and hunting dogs. Basically a glorified assistant.) or the two will argue for hours in the waiting room if they run into each other.

Jaskier fosters animals constantly (he has a big heart and a deep wallet, what can he say?) so he’s commonly bringing in dogs and cats and the occasional exotic to make sure that they are healthy and can be rehomed. He flirts with everyone. All the time. Also a lot of business comes from people who he refers to the clinic.

Aiden is another tech. He has a way with cats that no one else does. Even clients are surprised. A lot of cat owners ask for him by name because of it.

Gaetan is a kennel tech that wants to become a vet some day. He dreams of opening an all cat hospital and roped Aiden into the idea. Lambert thinks they’re crazy.

Vesemir used to be a large animal vet but now works the books for his boys.

Ciri is Geralt’s god child and dreams of becoming a zoo vet some day and spends most of her time not at school at the clinic with Geralt.

That’s all I got for now, may add to it. If anyone has suggestions or head canons let me know. Also PLEASE if this inspires fanart or fanfics tag me.

[fandom-junk-drawer]

The Witcher Headcanon - Worm Witcher Worm

Jaskier wrote Burn Butcher Burn after The Mountain Divorce, and spent the next two years singing it in every tavern and inn he came to. It became one of his most well-known songs.

Geralt spent his time wandering the Path alone, and heard people talk about a popular song, but he never paid much attention. After he made up with Jaskier and they started traveling together again, he eventually found out about the song.

It was awkward. Really awkward. They couldn't look each other in the eye, and conversation was painfully uncomfortable for days afterwards. They had a nice long talk one evening, only after Roach got tired of watching them wallow and took matters into her own hands...er, hooves.

She'd trod heavily on Geralt's foot while he was unsaddling her, then shoved him toward Jaskier with her head. Geralt had taken the hint and started the most awkward converstation in history.

Under Roach's watchful eye, threatening snorts, and laced back ears, words were exchanged, the figurative Olive Branch was extended, given an encouraging shake, and apologies were made along with promises to be better.

Fast forward months later. Jaskier and Geralt were back to being besties, and Jaskier was spending another winter with his surrogate family. Jaskier had gotten up late, had a late breakfast, and then drank some wine to get rid of his hangover.

He'd harrassed Lambert about his hair, lecturing him in the middle of the Great Hall before dragging him down to the hotsprings.

He'd gone wandering the corridors and empty rooms of the keep, playing out the stories in his head that would inspire songs and ballads.

He'd gone to have long, philosophical discussions with Roach, who was a very good listener, and agreed with him on everything.

Jaskier skipped down to lab to f**k with Yennefer, getting in the way, bantering, and generally being a nuissance.

"Will you get out of here? I'm trying to work, you irritating, insufferable, c*ckwomble!"

"Oh, please! You know you can't stand to be parted from me!"

"I will part you if you don't leave immediately!"

"Ooooh, it that a proposition?"

"Get out before I throw you in the garden, and plow you-!"

"That's anatomically impossible for you to do, but I'm always open to new experiences. I'm sure we could figure something out!."

"I'm going to turn you into a worm!"

Jaskier ran for it when Yennefer lunged at him, and ducked out the door, laughing. "You'd still love me even if I was a worm, right?"

Yennefer chased him out the door, throwing an empty bowl at him.

Jaskier retreated to his room, deciding it was best to stay out of Yennefer's way for a while. He worked on one of his new songs for a while, then went down to the kitchen to pinch a bottle of wine and some bread and cheese.

He took his time, enjoying his snack, and as the level of the wine in the bottle slowly dropped, he started thinking about what Yennefer had said about turning him into a worm. Would she really do it? Would it be permanent, or would it wear off?

Would the spell work on Witchers? Would they be normal worms, or would they be different? They were Witchers, after all. Would they keep their Witcher qualities? Would they be Witcher worms?

And that begs the question: would he be regular worm sized, or would he be, like, a giant worm? With a hat? Would he still be able to sing? Would he be just a giant worm with a fancy hat and a lute that went around singing songs?

Would he sing about people, or would he only sing about worms? Would he have to change his songs to be about worms instead? And how would he play his lute? Would he use his a**end, or would he have some sort of little arms? His brain, marinated in alcohol, started exploring the idea.

Several hours later, Jaskier found himself back in the Great Hall, sitting at the dinner table with his Wolf family. He listened to the stories from the Path, laughing along, and teasing the Wolves about one thing or another. They drank and sang, and played games, and made fun of Lambert.

Long after they should have been in bed, all of them to a man were sh*tfaced off their a**es.

It was too hard to play Gwent when the cards wouldn't hold still long enough to get proper look at the suits, and you couldn't remember how to play anyway.

Telling stories of the Path had lost it's appeal after the stories only got more confusing because no one could remember which story they were telling and in what order the events happened.

Fighting was out of the question when the floor kept tilting and rolling under your feet and the b**tard you were trying to fight kept changing places everytime you blinked.

All the while, Jaskier's slowly pickling brain kept circling back to his earlier thoughts about worms. The thoughts wriggled in and squiggled around, burrowing deeper into his thoughts, brining new thoughts and questions, new things to wonder about.

Eskel tossed back the last dregs of his White Gull and plonked his tankard down, called cheerfully "Jask, sing us a song!"

"A song, bard!" the other Witchers called out in agreement, then started chanting, "Sing! Sing! Sing!"

Jaskier, brain embalmed at this point, heard the crowd calling him, and could not resist. The next thing he knew he was standing on top of the table, thoughts still falling down the rabbit hole of worms. He cradled his lute, and, with his last functioning brain cell only able to remember something about worms, started singing.

The song was familiar, especially to Geralt, but he was confused. They lyrics were different. He didn't remember the song being about worms. Still, it was catchy. It was one of those songs that stuck in your brian and kept you awake all night, playing over and over.

There was something about it that just made you want to get up and move. No, it was like some sort of magic spell: It compelled you to get up and...

Jaskier's voice rose and boomed through the Hall as he hit the chorus, "WORM, WITCHER, WoOoOrRRRMMMM!"

Jaskier could not explain the phenonemon that resulted in the weirdest form of locomotion that he had ever seen. Witchers all thourghout the Hall were throwing themselves to the floor and undulating across it like sine waves.

Jaskier marvled at the magical sight, belting out the next verses and following up with the chorus.

Yennefer and Vesemir, hearing the noise came into the Great Hall to see what f**kery was afoot and were greeted by the oddest sight.

Jaskier *Standing on the table*: "WaTcH ThAt WiTCheR WoOoRRRMMM!

Geralt and his brothers: *frantically doing The Worm*

Yennefer stood there watching out of horrified fascination, speechless as Geralt 'wormed' as if his life depended on it. If he wormed any faster, she feared he would go airborne. Jaskier hit the chorus line again, belting out "WoRm, WiTcHeR WoRM, WoRM, wOrM, WoRm..."

Vesemir dipped out without a word. He was going to bed. He was just too old for this sh*t.

Yennefer watched for a few moments as her two idiots went on with their nonsense. She wondered what was going on inside their heads, then decided she didn't want to know. She marveled at how easily she had let these two imbeciles into her life. She sighed. Love was so complicated.

Yennefer left moments later, not wanting to bear witness to what ever disaster was going to happen if one of them Wormed too close to the fire pit, or over the piles of empty bottles of White Gull.

The next morning, the Witchers woke up with massive hangovers, wondering why they felt as if they'd been bludgeoned by rock trolls. They could remember nothing of the previous night's activities, but for some mysterious reason, they all had had odd dreams about worms.

[shy-urban-hobbit]

For @elmonstro . Inspiration hit after our convo about potential Witcher Yule traditions and went in a weird direction 😂.

Aiden and Lambert are both oblivious, pining idiots and the other Kaer Morhen residents have had enough.

Implied, non graphic smut under the cut:

"It's mistletoe." Lambert stated like he was talking to a small child when he caught Aiden staring at it yet again with a slightly perplexed look on his face. The other Witcher elbowed him in the ribs as he rolled his eyes.

"I know what it is, Wolf. What I'm wondering is why you've just got random spriggs of it hanging over various thresholds this year."

"Jaskier's idea, probably." Lambert shrugged

"That still doesn't really tell me why." Aiden prompted when Lambert refused to elaborate. The Wolf could feel himself growing flustered. Explaining would lead his mind down a path he'd been trying to steer clear of for years.

"Yule tradition." Eskel piped up and thank the gods! Lambert wanted to hug his brother in that moment, "You're supposed to stay trapped under it until somebody kisses you." He continued, not looking up from his book...Lambert was going to reorganise everything in his brother's room, "And you were right, Lambert. Jaskier thought it would be fun."

"Of course he fucking would." Lambert grumbled under his breath. This was going to be a long and torturous winter.

It started out well enough. Aiden had discovered that Jaskier - typically - was happy with any form of physical affection bestowed on him, Eskel was happy to exchange friendly pecks on the cheek (as was Geralt, surprisingly), Vesemir's facial expression alone had warned everyone present that if they tried to kiss him, there'd be consequences, a brief hug however, was acceptable. It was the same with Yennefer, although it was becoming more of a thing to kiss her hand after Jaskier had done it as a joke and hadn't been blasted through the wall for his trouble and all of this was done with a smile and a laugh. Apart from when it came to Lambert.

No matter where or when, as soon as those two found themselves trying to pass through the same doorway it was like watching a couple of adolescents, the both of them turning into stuttering messes both reeking of anxiety as they brushed barely there kisses to each others cheeks before dashing off in opposite directions like their backsides were on fire. It would have been funny if it wasn't so painful to watch.

"Idiots. They are both idiots." Yennefer stated after having just watched Lambert staring longingly after Aiden when he left to help Vesemir bring some things up from the cellar, with Aiden doing likewise when Lambert left to see to a couple of things in his lab.

"Love truly is fucking blind." Jaskier groused from his perch in Geralt's lap, "I was sure the mistletoe would give them that teeny tiny push, you know?"

Yennefer patted his knee consolingly, "Oh it still will, little bard."

Eskel peered up at her suspiciously from where he'd had his head buried in his arms in despair at the situation, "What are you planning, Yenn?"

The witch said nothing as she took a dainty sip of wine.

"Aiden? Yennefer said you needed help with something."

"Awfully nice, considering I think it's Yennefer who's responsible."

Lambert looked down at Aiden, who was sat cross-legged on the floor just inside the doorway to the room he used whenever he accompanied Lambert in the winter, elbow resting on his knee as he propped his chin on his hand, "....I'm failing to see the problem."

Aiden got to his feet, pointed to draw Lambert's attention to the all too familiar plant above his head and made to take a step forward. Magic shimmered as it blocked him before his foot had even hit the ground, the same thing happening when he tried to take a step back further into the room, "Looks like she decided to take the trapped part of this literally."

Lambert groaned internally, "What about Jaskier, or Eskel? Can't they-"

"Offended." Aiden snorted, "And no, they all tried and no change. There's only you left."

"Offended."

"Well, maybe I've been saving the best for last. Now get over here and help your best friend."

All of Aiden's bravado vanished when Lambert moved into his space, close enough to feel his body heat, smell the slight nerves - but not close enough to touch, with Lambert's gaze settling on Aiden's ear.

"So should I, uhm -" he stuttered,

"Same as always?" Aiden asked, voice sounding only slightly steadier than Lambert's.

They both hastily brushed lips against offered cheeks - the quicker this was done, the quicker they could forget about it. Aiden once again tried to take a step into his room while Lambert made to back out into the corridor.

"Are you kidding me!?" Aiden bit out alongside Lambert's growl of "Yennefer!" as both of them were stopped in their tracks.

"Fucking great. Now what?" Lambert asked, running a hand through his hair.

"Maybe we did it too quickly?" Aiden suggested.

Lambert nodded in agreement, that seemed a perfectly logical explanation. They repeated the kiss, lingering this time, neither of them mentioning the spike in the scents of anxiety and the slightly quickened breathing of the other. Still nothing.

"Well, I'm out of ideas." Lambert leaned against the doorframe

"...I don't think I am."

"Hmm?"

Lambert wrinkled his nose at the nervousness now coming off Aiden in waves, the Cat looking more scared than Lambert had ever seen him.

"Aiden, are you-"

"Shut up. Just...please don't hate me for this."

Before Lambert could say anything else a hesitant kiss was pressed to his lips, his body stiffening on reflex.

Aiden pulled away as soon as he felt the other sieze up, "I'm sorry. I thought that maybe if...I don't actually know what I thought."

Lambert grasped Aiden's chin and repeated the same chaste kiss, only lingering a couple of seconds before pulling away and finally looking Aiden in the eye.

They collided with one another, Aiden's hands fisting in the front of Lambert's shirt while Lambert yanked him in with a hand on the back of his neck, both opening up to one another at the first hint of probing tongue. Lambert's hands travelled down, down, down to press lightly on the back of Aiden's thighs, the Cat getting the hint immediately and giving a little hop so he could wrap his legs around Lambert's waist. The Wolf moaned as Aiden's skillful fingers started making a mess of his hair as he rolled his hips while Lambert shamelessly groped Aiden's ass as he supported his weight.

It wasn't until Lambert's knees hit the bed he realised that they were now fully inside Aiden's room - quickly followed as he lowered them both onto the mattress by the realisation that they should probably close the door. He gave a deep chuckle as he felt Aiden pause in his efforts to apparently just rip Lambert's shirt clean off him and make a quick motion behind his head, closely followed by the sound of a door slamming.

"Hey." Lambert said softly. Aiden cracked an eye open to peer at him from where he'd been dozing in the strip of sunlight that fell oh so conveniently across Lambert's chest "What did you mean earlier before you - when you asked me not to hate you?"

"I thought that would have been obvious." Aiden sighed, propping himself up, "You always smelled like you were about two seconds away from bolting whenever we got caught under that fucking plant. I thought the idea of doing anything like that with me made you uncomfortable, so I kept quiet."

"Like you didn't smell exactly the same." Lambert rebuffed, tweaking Aiden's nose, "I never said anything because I thought it made you uncomfortable, otherwise I would have dragged you to bed years ago."

Aiden grinned, sliding up Lambert's body so they were face to face, hovering over him "Yeah?"

Lambert nodded, running his hands over the others ribs, "Oh yeah. There'd be no doubts about whether you were mine or not. They'd smell me all over you."

"Oh, so I'm yours now am I?" Aiden purred

"As much as I'm yours?"

Aiden gave him a couple of quick pecks, "I like the sound of that."

Without warning, he rolled off Lambert and leaned over the side of the bed, digging through his clothes before holding the sprigg of mistletoe triumphantly - he must have grabbed it off the doorframe when Lambert was distracted - before proudly placing it on the headboard.

"You're fucking ridiculous." Lambert laughed as he moved to get up and get something so they could clean themselves up. He was stopped by Aiden grabbing onto his arm.

"Ah ah ah, we're under the mistletoe. You know the rule."

Lambert made a show of rolling his eyes before leaning in and very quickly deciding that getting clean could wait.

[loki-is-my-kink-awakening]

I wanted to talk about Extraordinary Things and the Geraskier and Radskier elements in the song.

Forgive me if this has been done or is rather obvious. This is just me musing over the lyrics.

Keep your words on ice

Your gaze lights the fire

How many campfires did this happen? Jaskier doing his best to drag even a few words from Geralt while the witcher glares at the fire as if his eyes are stoking the flame.

But eyes of fire really speak of Radovid, too. He may speak more than Geralt did when Jaskier first met him, but there's a lot he doesn't say in words that he says in his eyes.

They say, "Keep on playing nice"

But I have no desire

Jaskier cannot be contained. It's why I love him. He will not be forced into a box. He contains multitudes.

But these lines speak of struggle. Jaskier could be at court if he wanted to, he's a viscount, but he has no desire to be that person. He needs the freedom of the wild.

And the two people that represent this struggle are Radovid (a life at court) and Geralt (freedom/out in the wild). It's kinda obvious who Jaskier is going to choose even without considering what Joey said in interviews (that Jaskier will have a choice, but it isn't a choice for him, he will always choose his found family).

Jaskier has no desire to stay at court, even for love.

Why waste our words

When lips were made for extraordinary things

Jaskier can talk. He can express himself in his songs and with words. But there's some things that can only be truly communicated through a kiss.

And let's face it, Jaskier has waited so long to communicate his feelings for Geralt. He wouldn't waste words any longer, he'd want to show his feelings.

It also links to the later lyrics of unspoken words between them.

With Radovid, there isn't any need to talk because it becomes clear how he feels about Jaskier through singing his song.

But also there is so much they cannot discuss because Jaskier needs to protect his found family.

Kissing Radovid is safer. Jaskier can communicate his feelings that way and can feel Radovid's feelings for him in deeds, not words.

It's not a want, it's a need

It is paying no heed to what others say to sing

Jaskier has never paid any heed to what others said of his songs or singing. But that is also a mask to protect himself.

Geralt told him not to write any songs about him. Jaskier did it anyway.

There's probably others who have told Jaskier not to write songs about them or Geralt that I've forgotten.

But "it's not a want, it's a need" is just so evocative of his heart the love he gives freely, and of him letting his creativity flow through him.

That creativity is something Radovid greatly admires. And I think Radovid also wants to play no heed to what others want him to do; he just isn't as free as Jaskier (the pretty songbird).

Ultimately, what Jaskier really wants is for someone to see him, like he sees others, and for that person to still have a visceral want for him once seeing him.

People have wanted him, his body, his time, his usefulness. Loved ones have finally accepted him as a friend and family member. No one yet has wanted all of him, the magnitudes he contains, the bad parts and the good, the real him. Mainly because he's never had someone pierce his armour.

And if Radovid is using Jaskier I swear to the gods I will rain merry hell on him.

The greatest songs are made up of unspoken words of love

Of them I have had enough

All of Jaskier’s songs contain some element of his love for Geralt. He is his muse, after all.

We all know Her Sweet Kiss and Burn, Butcher, Burn contain it most obviously.

And it's interesting here that we get Jaskier saying he's had enough of writing his love for Geralt. There's only so much you can continue to pour out and not get anything back.

And so, Jaskier has decided that his love for Geralt is platonic as a way to protect himself. If he's not wanting, he can't be hurt.

But we all know when Jaskier said that his love for Geralt is platonic, that it is a lie he is telling himself. Vespula wasn't fooled.

But it's interesting that we clearly see Jaskier longing for the real love he craves in these lyrics. And I don't want to take away the amazing aromatic headcanon for Jaskier or Geraskier having a queen platonic relationship, but there is a longing that is unfulfilled, whatever way you interpret that to be.

That longing can be fulfilled with Radovid.

With you, I have enough

With you, I am enough

I am enough

Again, I see Jaskier saying he is enough with Geralt just to be his friend. After all his years struggling to be his friend and also wanting more, it's interesting to see this friendship now settled as soon as Jaskier stops seeking more.

And a big part of that change between them has to be down to Geralt becoming a father and learning to open his heart to caring about those around him.

But with Radovid, Jaskier gets to be vulnerable, properly vulnerable with his heart. He does feel enough in Radovid's eyes, and that is truly for the first time.

Vespula knows Jaskier, but he doesn't let himself be truly vulnerable with his heart there. He lies about his feelings for Geralt to her (and himself). He gives his body, but does he give his heart? I would say no. They are close in many ways, but not emotionally, not in vulnerability.

Drop the sweet disguise

Your heart's beating too loud

The fairy tales and little lies can't drown out all the sound

We all know about Geralt's disguise: that witchers don't need no one or that they don't have feelings. In S3, we see this façade lift. Geralt shows his true self to Ciri as her father, Jaskier as his friend, and Yennefer as a partner when he forgives her.

Radovid wears a disguise. He's the drunk fool to those who cannot see it. But Jaskier can, because Jaskier also wears a disguise, something Joey commented on in at least one interview.

And I feel like this disguise is definitely shown on screen when Jaskier is with Vespula. He has feelings for her, obviously strong ones, but they aren't the same as his feelings for Geralt or Radovid.

He definitely tells Vespula more than he tells his other lovers. But Vespula isn't looking for Jaskier to be "the only one" for her. She is still pretty switched on about Jaskier’s heart.

So take this heart

And break this heart

For extraordinary things

Geralt has broken Jaskier's heart already. And now Jaskier seems to be settled into the role of friend with his "platonic" love.

And Geralt is an extraordinary thing to Jaskier. Nothing will take that away, not even heartbreak.

But the thing is, Jaskier isn't ready to give his heart truly to Geralt completely. In pieces, yes. The clear barrier of "He's my friend, that's it" has been set (for now).

But with Radovid we see Jaskier let go of his mask, drop down his armour and allow Radovid in. It could very well break his heart, but that won't stop him from loving Radovid.

He has become an extraordinary thing to Jaskier.

For all the years we have watched Jaskier longing, to finally see him with someone is amazing. I don't want his heart broken, but I know we have to accept that it's going to happen.

And here, for the first time since The Mountain, we have Jaskier willing to have it broken again.

Because without taking a chance on being fulfilled and happy, what are we?

Thanks for reading.