#you're hella valid

[capseisen]

Happy 6/9 (or 9/6), Lío [he/xem] 🎂🦎

[three--rings]

While writing today I was thinking...so I was writing something kinky, something that I find personally quite hot and that fit with the characters and scenario.  But I hesitated because...well I imagined people objecting to it on the grounds that it would be a Bad Idea to do In Real Life. 

And specifically, it reminds me of specific criticism I’ve heard leveled at the 50 Shades books.   And like, first of all I’m not here to defends 50 Shades, for one thing it would be really hard to do since I’ve never read them or seen any of the movies.  But also I’ve always thought some of the criticism they receive is unnecessarily harsh.  (Not all of it.  Just some.)

Because to me, a lot of people seem to really be unable to approach a work of fiction, and IN PARTICULAR a work about sex without pretending it is 100% Real.  And they direct their criticism accordingly: can you imagine doing this in real life, omg you would be arrested omg perverts omg sex crime omg dirtybadwrong.  

And like people never seem to stop and consider that...fiction is fantasy.  A safe exploration of ideas that are either unfeasible or impractical to enact in the real world.  I don’t care if your fantasy is being a pirate on the high seas or getting railed behind a supermarket, they are both impractical and full of moral, ethical and legal problems. 

But people act like, yanno exploring one of these things in fantasy is fine and the other is a sign that you’re a Secret Degenerate.  That you Don’t Understand That This Would Be Wrong. 

But like, I was brought face to face with this today, writing something that I’m very aware is at the least Extremely Morally Dubious in a real world context.  But writing it anyway because it’s hot to me and what the fuck is smutty fanfic for if NOT exploring these things safely.

And I just feel like so much of Media Criticism these days, especially of the tiktok/youtube variety, though I enjoy snarking at shitty things as much as the next person, but so much of it is pearl-clutching about fiction being unrealistic.  That if this Fictional Scenario Was Real it would be bad and unhealthy and dangerous and like, it’s always about the romance tho, isn’t it.  It’s rarely about how actually you’d get gangrene from that wound without antibiotics or whatever. 

And I’m really tired of this idea that Fiction for Women is bad because the audience is Too Stupid to tell the difference between fiction and reality.   And sometimes it’s about YA, and the argument is they’re too young.  Okay, fine.  But like, again, are you focusing on the bad advice about surviving in a wilderness or or you focusing on the unrealistic romances?

So yeah, I don’t know.  I think it’s important to acknowledge that fiction sometimes appeals exactly for the fact that it doesn’t follow the same rules as the real world.  That people can have something in fiction they wouldn’t want in the real world.  That, in fact, fiction is the appropriate place for that to happen. 

I don’t know, this isn’t coherent.  But I’m so tired of this argument that I see about oh people are too stupid to tell the difference between Art and Escapism and it’s all the fault of fanfiction and Dumb Media and like I think actually most people can tell the difference between indulgent media and stuff that’s supposed to be gritty realism but it’s armchair critics who equate everything to the same level of Depiction is Endorsement.  And unfortunately this has been the dominate form of internet media criticism for long enough that it’s all an entire generation has been exposed to. 

And as someone who writes indulgent smut on the regular and also has a degree in literature and psychology, like actually I’m not at all confused about the line between fiction and reality thanks. 

[dentos-wife]

Let’s talk about Grima and how the characterization has changed a bit since Awakening, where let’s be honest there’s not much character there. But I feel like the little amount we got only of the Grimas portrays the original character now. I’ve been watching people fight over this back and forth in various places so I did a comparison and brought in some friends who don’t know Fire Emblem for their thoughts.

TLDR version: MGrima is the only one who captures the world ending hateful fell dragon vibe while FGrima has been feminized and softened because she’s the girl version and I hate it when media does this

With their base versions it was more like the Corrins or the Byleths general same message but a squint or you miss it difference

Male:

“I am the wings of despair. I am the breath of ruin. I am the fell dragon, Grima. Pay me the respect I am due, and I promise you a painless death”

Female:

“I am the wings of despair. I am the breath of ruin. I am the fell dragon, Grima. Pay me the respect I am due, and I will consider granting you a quick death when the time comes.“

Super similar, the boy however comes off as more threatening, no when the time comes or considering it. This is where the tiny differences started

Castle lines

Male:

“Ha. You fight for world peace? Stay your tongue. Such pretty little words sicken me.”

“My mind becomes muddy when I try to recall certain things... A side effect of traveling through space and time? Curse this frail body.”

“You fight for the happiness of all the people in this world? Hahaha, tell me... Did you come up with that little motto all by yourself? Go on, you can tell me what your heart truly desires.”

“You show promise, despite being human. If you continue to appease me, I may let you serve me.”

“Rite after rite, and still my memories refuse to return. This is beyond infuriating.. Maybe I'll go start a war to cheer myself up.”

Female:

“Wriggle like a worm trying to escape my boot, or die squished like a worthless maggot. Either way, you are little more than an insect.”

“Ugh... My splitting head... I remember nothing of my time in that other world... Nothing at all.”

“How about you stop pretending to be so selfless and tell me what you really wish for? Maybe I can grant it...”

“You show promise, despite being human. Of course, that's like being the smartest worm in the dirt. But still... I see enough in you that I could entertain the idea of keeping you by my side.”

“Memories or no, I will lay waste to the world all the same. You think me so fickle I'd change my mind?”

Still very similar but the male has slightly more personality by laughing and making little remarks here and there that the female doesn’t, still subtle though not a big deal it’s in what you prefer like most with an avatar preference and it’s still the same base character, however the female for whatever reason does come off as softer

Let’s do their confessions

Male

“You are a curious one... You willingly come to chat with me? The fell dragon? Alone? You know full well how I detest humans. They have no qualms asking for divine assistance when it meets their fickle needs... But how quick they are to shun their benefactors once they get what they desire. They become arrogant and make the same mistakes repeatedly, incapable of learning the folly of their ways. They claim their actions are for the good of others, but that's merely a show of self-indulgence. Humans are selfish. And the ugliness of mankind has turned me repulsive. It's the world that wants me to be evil. And yet you claim to need me here? Enough of your lies, worm. How dare you look at me with such a gaze. Do not dare pity me!”

Female

“Come to butter me up some more? How very irksome. I've nothing to chat about with a human. Humans spout their ideals, but it's nothing but lip service. Let's all join together and hold hands, you'll say. We can overcome our differences despite being different species, despite our differing core ideologies. The truth is what you see daily in this place. Day after day, night after night, all you have is never-ending war. One person's satisfaction means another must suffer. That is the truth of all worlds. But my power of destruction is the one true equalizer. If you think there's someone out there capable of leading the world with such high-minded ideas of love and bonds... I'd love to meet them. Hmph. After all that, you still talk your big talk? Very well. I'll watch over you... Right until your bitter end.“

It’s still extremely slight but the differences become more clear here, They’re the same lines but the male is more angry and the female more bitter. However it’s the same character. Granted if it were up to me the girl would just have the boys lines since Awakening they are the same but I get it, no one wants a copy. This was a good way to do the similar but different vibe of them though it still does have the female can’t be as angry stereotype bleeding through. It’s not perfect I’d make her angrier but it could be a lot worse. And then it gets worse…

Let’s talk about the Halloween alts because that’s when everything completely goes haywire. The outfits for one

Okay so yes this is a silly festival and both are fanservice it’s a fanservice game I get that but which one comes off as a more imposing force? The male’s ears look real his claws look sharp he actually looks like a threat goofy outfit or not. The female on the other hand has costume ears and booty shorts. She looks like a parody of the boys outfit.

She got an outfit like this because she’s a girl. But sadly it doesn’t stop there. The *lines* even sound like a parody

Male:

“If I had my way, this absurd festival would not exist...since there would be nothing but ruin in my wake.”

"Trick or treat?" Pah. Try "the utter destruction of the world, or treat." And I do not have a sweet tooth.

“Giving thanks for the harvest? Hmph. Of course you worms would waste time on something so meaningless. Resources exist to be consumed. It's as simple as that.”

“Before you play a trick on me, think hard of the consequences. Surely even a worm like you can imagine it”.

“You think I'm enjoying all this? Perhaps in your complacency you've forgotten the danger you're in.”

Female:

“I hoped to find the power I seek at this harvest festival... But it seems that was a mistake.”

“Festivals are nothing more than a brief reprieve from despair. The vain struggle of a worm...”

“Submit or suffer!...Must I say "trick or treat"? How dull.”

“If you intend to play a trick on me, it will be your last. Such foolishness is absolutely intolerable.”

“Costumes are a fool's amusement. Who was it who said it would be enjoyable, again? I'll kill them first.”

But hey I liked MGrima since his debut, loved his personality so I could be coming into this with a bias. So! I asked some friends who knew nothing about FE hey what vibe do these characters give off and is it the same vibe? Here’s their lines have fun. Here’s the result of that conversation

“I know this is not a general way to tell quality but . . . Male Grima dialogues are not only richer but also way longer in both cases lol and honestly? They could very well be saying the same here, the dialogue should stay the same or almost the same here they're supposed to treat the same topic with SMALL variations, since they're supposed to be the same person you know? But each convo seems to be about something completely different. He comes out to me as emo (in the most positive way), while she's supposed to be Btchy Daughter of Actual Evil Boss. He's somewhat menacing, and the way he talks makes him look (from my POV) like a depressing person to be around, a party pooper. YET I guess his words are too strong for a girl's mouth so that's why she gotta be cute about this instead. She can't be too deep or serious, that's not interesting in a girl”

Agree? Disagree?

The confessions are honestly the best example of this problem because one is uh not as deep let’s say

Male:

“It seems you possess a grave misunderstanding of the harvest festival, [Summoner]. You may celebrate nature's bounty, but remember that there are winners and losers in every exchange. For you to gain something, someone else must lose it. What brings joy to you casts bitter sorrow upon another. Those without the will or power to resist can only be crushed underfoot. Such is the nature of the harvest. Now you see the world through the Fell Dragon's eyes. Thus, I ask you: Are you the hunter or the hunted? Consider well your path. For my part, I will continue to reap the harvest's bounty through ruin and despair!”

Female:

“Enjoy your short lives while you can, worms. Before long, utter darkness will smother you... Although... These sweets are quite palatable. Subtle sweetness with a delicate mouthfeel, I— Yah! How long have you been there, [Summoner]?! What did you hear?! No, nothing! There was nothing TO hear. Yes. I wish to harvest ruin and despair. Sweets harbor no interest for me. But next time the harvest festival comes around, I expect an invitation. Promise me, lest I am forced to destroy this world. You understand...”

From another friend who also knows nothing about FE

“The male one sounds like he's speaking from experience, like he's witnessed or taken part in many wars or other kinds of conflicts, and has crushed people who believed they were more powerful than him with his own hands The female one's personality is closer to a tsundere“

Look at how you can actually get Grima’s personality from his lines and not so much the girl. Now imagine flipping them. The male is the tsundere candy lover and the girl is the ancient old dragon, does that make you realize how weird it is?

MCorrin and FCorrin have matching halloween alts in comparison and even have the same lines with slight differences, they’re like twins

Which is what you’d expect with the literal same character just in a different body. Alas...

Which now brings us to the next alt of all, based off this cipher card

Boobs! And sexualization to the max, the hehe I’m evil pose? the daintiness it’s so...

Her lines too, she whispers “devote yourself to me entirely” seductively, I bet they will not do that with the male, if they do I’ll eat my words and gladly

So I showed my friend this one’s lines and says hey thoughts?

“the dominatrix fetish is too blatant, but like not in a cool way you know, the classical of a girl that is introduced as this ruthless being of doom but gets nerfed mid-story when she falls in love with the unremarkable plain male prota of this proto harem, and she like . . . Has Been Secretly Soft And Needy All This Time and literally drops everything she's after to become An Ideal Wife for the male prota, picks up feminine interests and hobbies in hopes to be more appealing to him that's the vibes I get from this female Grima or whatever she's supposed to be“

She’s very curious what the matching males lines are going to be

But this brings me to my point why is Grima so different depending on if he has a male or female vessel? It really shouldn’t be this way, in Awakening Grima’s lines were exactly the same no matter if it was MRobin or FRobin because Grima is a murderous humanity hating dragon but since Halloween...man you do not get that vibe from the girl anymore. You do from the boy. I know why it’s like this sex sells yada yada yada. I also know the boy gets some of it like the damage art but that’s damage art, almost everyone has it, FGrima here goes above and beyond that to softening her lines and doing an evil queen vibe and that’s a crime dammit!

Like yeah I know the base does this to both and it’s fine when it’s the fanbase but when CANON does it to only one of them, it’s flat out sexism

MGrima alt based off this cipher card when? If hers was based off the cipher card I doubt he’s sharing her outfit but if he does I demand the same girly pose; it’s equality

And then once they’re matched up again stop with the Grimas and never bring them out again, we didn’t need this many Grimas go back to Robin. I like Grima I’ll take his alts (no longer the girl unless they stop the uh fetishing tbh I’m a little uncomfortable with this recent one...) but this is a crime for both Robin now. FRobin being an GHB unit has no resplendent and no version in the main pool. She unlike MRobin did get a seasonal to herself earlier this year though. In comparison MRobin has a resplendent but if you don’t count the duo and some don’t because Chrom is the lead, hasn’t gotten an alt to himself since 2017. And since we got FGrima sounds like he has to wait longer for that since MGrima would drop first.

Unless we get an MRobin to go with this FGrima but that opens up even *more* sexualization issues; FRobin is only popular when evil and sexy so that’s the alt she gets while the male gets to be himself? Eeeh that’s really gross. So in that regard I hope we get one more MGrima and they’re shoved in the closet for good, allowing the real Robin’s to shine. Halloween was a neat idea the werewolf represented the Robin to Grima connection in a cool way considering werewolf lore and it was a good alt choice well...for the one who actually looked like a werewolf...

I know this is a problem of female sexualization and FE is not the only franchise where this is a problem but man GRIMA?!

And okay you could argue well M and F Robin are probably the most difference in personality avatars we have and you’re right but that makes it even stranger. FRobin is ever so slightly meaner and harsher than MRobin who is a little kinder. So then why would having Grima take over make MRobin the meaner and harsher one shouldn’t it stay on FRobin?

I only like the characterization on MGrima at this point, Girlma (as I call her) now feels like a completely different character, a toned down female parody of the other and it’s a damn shame even the creature that wiped out all of humanity and sent the world into despair got the “girls need to be sexy or cute” treatment.

Anyway that’s just me, FGrima fans you guys are cool if you like her that’s wonderful don’t take this as an attack or anything I just wanted to write out my thoughts that have been bothering me since the Halloween alts which should have been the final Grima alts but...you know money

[hella1975]

been coming to terms with the fact that as someone 20 and lacking the grades or interest for post secs that let you dorm im never really going to have that sort of experience. which is a bit sucky yah i think that getting the in-between stage before actually moving out is likely mad useful not to mention uhh more levels of freedom and the bonus fun that is having to make friends with random people because now u live with them (that was always my favorite part of summer camp as a kid) ACTUAL POINT BEING: since i'll never get that... boy oh boy am i living vicariously through you. very much enjoy every chunk of "hella goes to uni" ur basically my newspaper so cheers !!♡♡♡

HELP YOU'RE WELCOME <3 EVERYONE ON BOARD THE TRAINWRECK <3

[kookslastbutton]

Guilty Pleasures ༓ jjk, kth (m) | chapter ii

✒ Summary: Three years of being Seoul's power couple earns you nothing but a big fat divorce settlement and your face plaster on every gossip column around town. You're angry, hurt, and desperately want to move on, but worst of all? You're still in love with the man who started the whole mess, even though the most he can ever see you as is a friend. The renowned actor you've hired to be your company's new endorser seems to have a soft spot for you though. He's easy on the eyes, you'll admit, but who actually wants a divorcee like yourself? It's unrealistic really.

pairing: ex-husband ceo!jungkook x ceo!reader, actor!taehyung x ceo!reader

genre/AU: angst, smut, fluff, loverstoexesto ?, coworkers2?, unrequited love

Word count: 4.5k

Warnings: oc and jk are both 30, Taehyung is 32, swearing, fighting, confrontation, tornado of emotions, mentions of alcohol consumption, mentions of sexism in the media and business world, public shaming (both direct and indirect), morally grey characters, mentions of toxic relationships, mentions of abandonment issues, mentions of therapy, attempts to self-regulate but reader is pissed, mentions of self-blame though oc knows its not entirely her fault, mentions of defamation charges, JK is just 🤬 while KTH is 😇

playlist: Unkiss Me, Apologize, Hate That I Love You, etc.

a/n: Woah okay....so had I fun writing this, even though it took me a hella long time to decide whether to continue the story as a series or not 🫣 Anyway I altered the summary slightly from chapter one (and updated for consistency purposes), but it doesn't change my overall plans! As you read this chapter, I hope you will be able to see my vision (I'm nervous af! haha)! Enjoy 🥰 (edited but pls forgive me for any oversights...my typos are ridiculous)

series masterlist | next >>

You’re seated in a wide sofa chair, surrounded by four blank walls, and the gentle sound of water tricking from a faux rock waterfall. Every element of the space is carefully integrated as a means to calm you. Yet it doesn't calm you in the slightest. Your hands are clammy. Muscles tense with the adrenaline spiking through your veins. It doesn’t help that you’ve been running on nothing but black coffee all week either, refusing to eat until the first promo shoot with your company’s new endorser was launched.

A natural in front of the camera, Kim Taehyung was able to speed the process up, yet it didn’t stop the massive dark circles from forming under your eyes. This morning, he'd told you they were unnoticeable but you've seen how you look in the mirror, and they're anything but unnoticeable. Still, you find his gesture to soothe sweet. Thankfully, your new partnership has been smooth sailing which is quite a blessing considering the disaster he nearly walked into.

Yes. You’re referring to that disaster in particular. When, in some desperate last-minute attempt for validation, you threw yourself into the arms of your ex-husband.

More like fixed the collar of his shirt and whoops, slid right on his dick…again.

What is wrong with you?

You’ve been asking yourself the question far too many times. You’d think being a hot-shot CEO of a million-dollar tech company would make you like titanium, resilient as finely pounded steel but no; you're just barely keeping yourself together. You regret your rash decision that day, you regret ever marrying Jeon Jungkook, and you regret ever giving in to your stupid feelings.

That’s why you’re here now, waiting in the office of your therapist’s private practice, hands restless in your lap. You’ve been seeing Melody for just over two months since your divorce was finalized, ready to move on; trying to, more like.

‘JeonX CEO Jeon Jungkook’s ex-wife compensated $1.8 billion in divorce’

‘South Korea’s Golden It couple split with ex-wife taking half the company revenue’

These are the lovely words that greet you from your phone screen.

You have the urge to grab your special red ballpoint pen from your bag and scribble out the entire paragraph, except it’s not a printed gossip magazine— it’s a newspaper column on the internet. Instead, you close out the pesky tab on your phone and reply to its sender.

Chim 🐥: can you believe this crap they’re saying about you?! It's no shit you were given a hefty divorce settlement. You brought in half the income! They’re making you look like some kind of gold digger. I swear if I ever lay my eyes on that pretty ex-husband of yours, I will end him! 😡 [sent at 5:06 pm]

Park Jimin, your childhood best friend, sends you a follow-up text when you don’t immediately reply to the news articles he forwarded over. He’s been extremely overprotective of you lately and especially pissed at how the media’s been portraying you, while Jungkook is seemingly getting a free ride. He’s always had an axe to grind with your ex-husband, to be honest, the divorce gives him only more reason to hate him.

You: Thanks for your concern Chim, but nothing they say surprises me anymore. If you don’t mind, can you stop sending these to me? [sent at 5:12 pm]

You hope your message doesn’t read as cold or dismissive. Jimin’s concern for you is a light in a dark place, but you don’t really want to be reminded of the amount of slandering articles still targeted towards you.

Gone are the days when the public saw you as a powerful woman in business, the one to watch, or the CEO of the fastest-growing startup in the last ten years. You're now simply Jeon Jungkook’s conniving ex-wife; as if you’ve merely seduced him for his money and ran when the going was good.

Of course, the whole situation is skewed to his side; half the world is in love with him after all, and that includes the few lingering reporters who've been practically salivating three feet from you at any given chance, hoping to get an exclusive “inside look”. Your marriage was a sham, you wanted to scream, a mutual business transaction.

Too bad rather than an increase in status, resources, and market share, you gained a pile of twisted, unwarranted emotions and regrets.

“I apologize for the wait Ms. __."

The door swings open as your therapist rushes into the room. She stops at her desk to retrieve last week’s session notes, then takes a seat in the chair adjacent to you with crossed legs.

“It’s okay,” you assure, straightening your posture. “I understand how crazy busy the day can get. It wasn't a long wait anyway."

Melody gives a small smile and jots a few words on her notepad. “Thank you for understanding. How are you doing this week?”

You take a deep breath. "Tired," you respond, "especially this week at work. It's like as soon as I wrap up one project, there's another jumping out from nowhere." You used to be ahead of the game. Now you're barely surviving.

"That's right," she hums. "Last week you mentioned having to attend a charity gala soon. Would you like to start there today?"

Crap, you're suddenly reminded that you have to pick up your gown by 7 pm tonight. You entertained the idea of not going to the gala at all, but that would do you no favors in the end. Given your situation, you can't skip out on such an important charity event.

"Sure," you nod. "The Winter Gala's tomorrow night, actually. It's funny how I used to look forward to it every year, being an opportunity to network and catch up with my peers. I can't say I feel the same thrill this time around."

"Because of the divorce you mean?"

"Exactly. Being the CEO of one of the largest software corporations in the world, my ex-husband's influence far exceeds my own. So whether out of loyalty or political agenda, anyone who's anyone will be on his side of the room. I'm gonna end up being that one awkward person in the corner in a far too expensive Dior gown who no one wants to dance with." You nervously chuckle out the last sentence.

Melody opens her mouth to respond, yet stops when she notices you're not quite finished.

"It'll be the first time seeing my ex-husband after months of no contact too. I guess that's what I'm looking forward to the least."

When you think about it, the most you've seen of Jungkook is his face appearing on the massive screens downtown. He's been featured in at least a dozen interviews lately, teasing a brand-new product his company's planning to release in the spring. Seems he's doing well.

"What you feel is valid Ms. __." Melody seeks to assure you. "In the past, you used to go to these events with Jungkook right? He provided you with a sense of safety, as you did for him, no doubt. I wonder if it's a lack of consistency and belonging that worries you, more than it is about seeing your ex-husband and your peers. Companionship too, of course."

"I suppose that makes sense, but it never used to be this way." Your voice raises to match your sudden argumentativeness. "I used to be very comfortable in my own skin. I used to be confident going to these events alone, long before Jungkook came into the picture."

You pause to take a breath before continuing.

"When Jungkook became CEO of his family's software company, JeonX, he was steps away from being bought out by both our competitors, so a partnership was proposed. We married at 27 as nothing more than two ambitious, rising leaders in business. Neither of us was after love or romance when our careers were at stake."

"But then that changed for you," your therapist carefully observes. "Combined, you both held the largest share of the tech market. You and Jungkook were also in an extremely intimate relationship, yet treated it as a business contract. Unfortunately, those don't always come out clean in the wash. It appears to me that while you gave him three honest years of your life, he stole those three years from you."

The words take a moment to sink in; Jungkook stole three years from you. It conflicts with what you want to believe, though from the bottom of your heart, you know she's right.

"I feel so...guilty. I hate that I fell for him, and I hate that I'm struggling this much to let him go." As you tear up, Melody hands you a tissue from the side table with an empathetic gaze. You mouth a thank you and gently dab your eyes with the soft fabric.

"I'd give yourself some grace Ms. __. But if I may ask, what about Jungkook?" she gently probes. "Do you think he feels the same?"

"No...," you say with remorse, shaking your head. "He's moved on."

Melody remains silent for as long as you need in the moments following, cautious to follow your lead. The last thing a therapist should do is rush their patient through the session, so she sits patiently and waits for your go.

"Sorry," you finally say. "We should continue."

"No need for apologies," she replies. "Take your time."

It takes a good minute or two longer of sitting in your car before you can fully compose yourself. As usual, your session with Melody was intense and insightful, but it was far too short. You're gripping the wheel with both hands when her final words of the session echo through your head: "Give yourself some grace; blaming yourself won't do any good."

Seemingly simple advice, yet tough to follow when you constantly feel responsible for the mess you're in. Yes, even though Jungkook has the bigger end of the stick, you made your share of mistakes too. You should have looked into other options when you found out your competitors were looking to buy out JeonX instead of eloping with their CEO.

Just what were you thinking __? you harshly scold yourself. You were trying to protect your company. You both were. Too bad you placed the cart in front of the horse.

Forcing yourself to take a slow, deep breath, your eyes widen in alarm when you catch the time on the clock— 6:38 pm. Fuck! The boutique that's holding your gown for tomorrow's gala is closing in twenty minutes. Without a moment to spare, you yank the seatbelt and slam your foot on the gas.

"Good evening Ms. __." A young woman, fitted in a black pencil skirt and white blouse, greets you with a faint bow as soon as you step foot into the posh boutique.

"Hello, Hana," you refer to the young lady by name with a smile. "I'm terribly sorry to be coming in this late. I came by to pick up the gown I sent in for alterations two weeks ago. The event's tomorrow and I know the shop will be closed for the day."

Knowing the exact dress you're referring to, Hana responds with a soft tone, "Please don't worry Ms. __. We have the gown ready." She disappears to the back of the shop to retrieve it.

As you wait, your mind drifts to memories of last year's gala. You had worn a vibrant, gold gown that evening, slightly risky with a low neckline. Jungkook liked it though, as he wore a matching gold vest himself. You can imagine how crazy the press went when you both set foot on the scene, arms linked and appearing to have coordinated your attire perfectly.

Every investor at the gig wanted to be your friend that night, anxiously pushing through the crowds to speak to you. One of them nearly split your dress in two, as he had accidentally stepped on your gown after one too many drinks. You recall Jungkook scolding the man before turning his full attention to you, making sure you were alright. You consider this to be the first time you truly started looking at him as your husband, a feeling of warmth blooming inside you.

How foolish you were to let that feeling grow.

You're attending the gala alone this year, without him.

Possessing no desire to call attention to yourself this year, you've chosen a rich, navy blue gown instead. It's subtle yet sophisticated. Made out of the finest silk, its silhouette is sleek and falls straight down to the floor without any extravagant frills. The neckline is simple too, paired with a tasteful open back. There are no flashy accessories or embellishments, just a straightforward, classic design. You find the gown beautifully elegant, and nowhere near as bold as your previous one.

"Here it is Ms. __," Hana chips from afar, her heels clacking against the polished floor tiles. In her hand is a generously sized garment bag, your dress flowing underneath.

"Thank you so much, Hana," you say, taking the gown from her hand. "Again, I'm sorry for my tardiness picking this up. I hope you have a wonderful night."

You leave the boutique, the sun having already set.

The Winter Gala takes place on the top floor of Seoul's most luxurious hotel, specifically in its grand ballroom. The walls are adorned with gold trim, and its floors are elegantly lined with polished black marble. Above, a magnificent glass chandelier glimmers, catching the moonlight filtering through the surrounding glass windows.

Despite being a private event, the gala attracts a whole slew of press and locals who eagerly gather on either side of the hotel's front doors, treating it as a prime spot for viewing the red carpet.

Physically, you're ready; dressed to the nines, and makeup done just right. Mentally, you're absent; secretly sipping a margarita at the end of the earth, wherever that is. The day finally comes for you to make an appearance at the Annual Winter Gala and it's clear, you're not prepared in the slightest.

Your nerves consume you as you sit in the backseat of your limousine. You protested against being dropped off at the front entrance. Hell, you hadn't even wanted to arrive in a limo. However, your PR team insisted you be seen arriving, happy to be supporting a charitable event for the eighth year in a row.

Reluctantly, you complied.

Chim 🐥: I wish I could be there with you tonight 😞 No matter what, don't let those snobs get into your head. You look stunning and you have nothing to be ashamed of! [sent at 6:23 pm]

"Thank you, love," you whisper to aloud upon reading your best friend's endearing message. Before you can craft a reply, your door is flung open, with harsh flashes of cameras blinding you. When you step out of the limo, you hear a mix of passionate cheering and interrogative remarks.

"Ms. __, could you share with us your experience of attending the gala without Jeon Jungkook by your side for the first time?"

"Ms. __, it's unexpected to see you here this year, especially considering your recent separation from your ex-husband, who is also on the guest list!"

"Ms. __, how do you plan to navigate the evening's festivities without the familiar presence of your former partner?"

Just keep walking __. If you can just get inside the building and tune out the noise, you'll be fine. You coach yourself with every step, but make little progress with the amount of discomfort only skyrocketing. Your photos are being taken, and questions barrage you from all angles. To top it off, you feel a strong migraine coming on and oh fuck— is that the devil now?

You don't have to glance back to guess the sudden increase in cheering is due to the arrival of another hot A-lister. It has to be Jungkook with a new woman by his side. You think he wouldn't bring a date to an event like this, even if she were a hire? You'd be horribly mistaken.

You fight against the urge to turn around and confirm if your suspicions are true.

"__!" a voice calls out, which you ignore.

But wait a minute.

You stop in your tracks—that's not Jungkook's voice at all; it’s far too raspy.

Peeking over your shoulder, your jaw falls open as you see Kim Taehyung steps behind you wearing a boxy grin on his face. He's dressed to the hills with a shiny maroon, Louis Vuitton suit hugging his slim waist. Quite handsome, per usual, but what is he doing here?

Taking the initiative, Taehyung strides next to you and waves to the crowd charismatically. “My movie shoot wrapped up early so I thought I’d swing by and see what all the excitement’s about,” he says.

You observe how easy it is for him to appease the crowd, a skill you’re still working to sharpen.

“Tae-” you begin.

He then turns to you and looks straight into your eyes. You shiver at from the sudden intensity.

“I got an invitation too, and the gala happens to support a cause that I find close to my heart.” His voice lowers for the next part, allowing only your ears to hear. “I also didn’t want you having to be alone this evening, __. I hope I didn’t overstep my boundaries.”

Taehyung’s words manage to coax you away from your previously frazzled state, comforting you as the chaos quiets around you.

“Thank you, Taehyung. You didn’t, don’t worry,” you reply, giving a tight-lipped smile. “It’s actually a good thing you came since you’re basically the second face of my company after all.”

“I’m happy to hear that. We’ve been working so well together recently, and I don’t want to ruin it. May I?” He offers you an arm.

“You may.” You slip your arm into his and continue towards the hotel entrance. You admit you’re glad to see him.

With Taehyung nearby, your apprehensions of the night start to subside. He’s not always beside you, slipping away to mingle often, yet his mere presence relaxes you. You haven’t even thought about Jungkook to be honest. Well, maybe a little bit.

You take a sip of the drink in your hand and casually scan the ballroom until bingo, you spot your ex-husband by the bar in the middle of half a dozen people. Figures he’s the center of attention, effortlessly tethering people to himself. Jungkook loves the spotlight, and the spotlight loves him. As you continue watching him from across the room, a whirlwind of conflicting emotions swirls within you; longing, sorrow, anger. You haven't seen him in over two months, it feels surreal.

Memories of your time together come flooding back all at once—both the good and the bad, yet mostly bad. It's strange how someone you were once so close to can suddenly feel like a stranger. You allow your gaze to linger a moment longer, curious to conclude a date is nowhere in sight. Perhaps you’re mistaken and they’ve merely slipped away for a second. You’re positive he would’ve brought someone.

Bitterly, you gulp down another sip of your drink. When you place your glass down, you nearly choke at the sight of Jungkook's dark eyes burning holes at you. You avert your gaze immediately, silently begging that he didn’t just witness you staring at him and take it as an unsolicited invitation to come over.

“So,” a provocative voice unexpectedly slides next to you. “Looks like you just traded one bachelor for the next __. I’m shocked to see you’ve shown up to our little soirée.”

Oh god, you roll your eyes, recognizing the owner of the slithery voice like the back of your hand. You do not have the stamina for this tonight.

“Kathy," you greet with the fakest, yet sweetest smile possible. "Nice seeing you again. I haven't seen you since last year. How's the baby?"

"Oh please," she scoffs. "Don't try to deflect, sweetie. We both know it's you who is of far more... intrigue. If you understand my gist."

You want to hurl at this woman's condescending tone. Nothing gets under your skin more than someone your age calling you sweetie. It's not endearing in the slightest, especially when it's Kathy Lee, Director of CommaTen. You despise each other, likely because you both hit it big in the industry at a young age. Meeting someone who reminds you so closely of yourself isn't always a blessing.

“Anyway, as I was saying," she continues, brushing her hair behind an ear. "I have quite the bone to pick with you about stealing that actor from me. Kim Taehyung was mine first, you know."

Hers? She speaks as if a person can be owned. You won't lie, you're surprised Taehyung agreed to partner with you at a time when most of Seoul's elites have turned against you. You're naive to assume that his support wouldn't backfire on his reputation. On the other hand, he's been your endorser for two months now and his following remains fully intact.

“To be frank, I didn't know the two of you were talking business at all," you respond to the accusations with composure, though burning up inside. "But of course, he's free to make his own decisions, can't he? Whatever the reason, something must have enticed him."

“You—" Offended by your insinuation that your offer was better than hers, Kathy doesn't stop what comes next. "We both know the only reason why Kim Taehyung's with you is because Jungkook left you! And you need the extra publicity, isn't that right?"

Fuck. Well, now you're really fucking embarrassed because, at that moment, everyone in the room shifts their attention your way. A pin drop could be heard in the entire ballroom since even the live band ceased their playing.

This is why you didn't want to come. Your fingers fumble with the fabric of your gown.

“Don't act like you're above me just because your company might be worth more than mine, __. We'll catch up with you soon," Kathy spits her final words before spinning around and triumphantly walking away.

Don't cry, you tell yourself. Everyone's staring at you; the press, your peers, Jungkook, and Taehyung. Don't you dare cry.

As the murmurs of conversation gradually resume around you, you force yourself to take a deep, steadying breath. Kathy's words were nothing but a feeble attempt to save her own face. Besides, what company doesn't have at least one endorser?

"Are you alright?" Taehyung's low, gentle voice catches your attention as he swiftly returns to your side, no doubt influenced after witnessing Kathy's verbal jab.

You manage a tight-lipped smile, nodding faintly as you attempt to push back the overwhelming wave of humiliation. "I will be," you reply, though the words feel hollow even to your own ears.

His gaze lingers on you for a moment longer, a silent understanding passing between you.

"I hope you don't take her words to heart, __," he mutters. "I chose to become your partner because I genuinely believe in your product. I'm selective about who I support, so please trust me when I say it wasn't because of material gain or pity."

You're on the verge of responding to his reassurance when you catch sight of your ex-husband from the corner of your eye, striding his way over to you for the first time tonight. His expression is unreadable, so you brace yourself, unsure of what to expect.

"__," he starts, his voice low but carrying an unmistakable urgency. "Can we talk?"

You and Taehyung share a quick glance before you follow Jungkook out of the ballroom, seeking privacy.

As soon as you're out of earshot, Jungkook turns to you, his features softened by a hint of concern. "Hey," he starts. "I meant to get over to you sooner but got tied up. You know how it is."

"Yeah, I know," you respond, though you'd rather he didn't come over at all, especially after being dragged into the spotlight in front of all your peers and colleagues.

The two of you share an unsettling silence before he speaks again.

"You-You look good." He allows his eyes to rake up and down your body, causing you to cross your arms in discomfort. There was a time when his gaze brought a flutter of excitement, but now, you're not so sure it brings you the same pleasure.

"I'm sorry for what happened in there," he says. "You okay?"

"What?" you repeat, your eyes wide with surprise, stunned by his unexpected apology. "Am I okay?"

Where was this concern when he handed you the divorce papers nine months ago? Or when he willingly took advantage of your vulnerability that time in your office, only to disappear afterward, as if he hadn't just torn your heart out of your chest? You clench your fists, trying to contain the rising temperature of your anger.

"Yeah, about what she said about you," he clarifies. "It was uncalled for, and I feel horrible about it." He reaches out to touch you, but you instinctively step back, as if his touch would scorch you.

"Please, don't," you sigh, a trace of weariness in your voice. "It's fine."

"I'm serious __, I can have her charged with defamation for that. It wouldn't take much!" His insistence is unwavering, and it strikes your last nerve.

"You don't need to fight my battles for me, Jungkook," you suddenly snap, voice stern. "I'm not completely helpless now that you've divorced me!"

Jungkook's expression darkens, regret flickering in his eyes. "I'm not saying you are. I'm just trying to help."

"Help?" you repeat, doubtful. "How do you think that's going to look for me in the media? Jeon Jungkook slaps another high society member with a defamation charge for ex-wife. Thanks, but no thanks. I get enough of that as is."

He sighs, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "I know they've been difficult on you recentl—"

"Difficult?" you interject, your anger bubbling to the surface. "In case you haven't noticed my face is on every gossip magazine, billboard, press release, and anything else they can use to scorn me with. It's unbearable, especially since I still have a business to run."

Jungkook winces, clearly stung by your words. "Then let me help. I'll get them removed for you. I still care about you, __."

You scoff. "You care about me? Is that why you made me sign our divorce papers three months after you found out I wanted more than a fake marriage?"

His jaw clenches, gaze dropping to the floor guiltily. "It's not like that, __. I'm not trying to be an avoidant asshole. I want you to-"

"Find someone else. Yeah, I got it," you mutter bitterly, feeling a fresh wave of hurt wash over you.

"I'm sorry, __. I am."

You stare at him, torn between resentment and a lingering ache for the connection you once shared. Now, he's apologizing?

"So am I," you say, slowly backing away from him. "You don't have to do anything, Jungkook. I'm fine."

You then turn on your heels to return to the ballroom where Taehyung still waits for you, leaving your ex-husband standing in the hallway, alone.

a/n: A much-needed confrontation between oc and jk eh? But... *laughs evilly*..this is not the end...LMK what you think! 🤔🤍

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side note: I tried tagging readers in comments but most of them didn't go through, so i'm sorry about the clutter here...😬

no reposting, copying, or translating my work– © kookslastbutton

[redhoodinternaldialectical]

Thoughts on Jason Todd’s choice of weaponry?

:D an ask! Yay!

Oooh, lets see, I'll start with the crowbars because I appear to be like one of three people on the entire planet who actually likes them.

They're a tacky as fuck riff on the fact that Jason's death is central to his character. They overemphasize the manner in which he died, muddy the waters about what part of his death is important to him, and strangely cheapens the manner in which he died through the parody feel of it.

No one seems to really disagree with my analysis here, but I happen to enjoy that about them and think it's very on brand for Jason. What can I say? They're fun!

Best Quality - His Wiggles

This ultra-sharp curved blade used to be his signature character design feature, the way the white streak in his hair is now, and I'm really not sure why it didn't stick!

Best weapon he's ever had, bring it back please!!!!!

The All-Blades

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM...

I have mixed feelings about the All-Blades. Like much of Lobdell's work: phenomenal idea, poor execution. Giving the guy who is most known for being morally grey a set of powers that is exclusively based on moral absolutes sucks shit, I gotta be honest, and the trick he pulled on the blood blade was cool but ultimately does nothing to solve those problems.

HOWEVER

I want to love them so fucking badly. A set of glowy soul blades is a dope sicknasty off the chain concept and I wish the well wasn't poisoned with the moral implications and the restrictions to use them only on the "Untitled", a set of enemies that only exist for Jason so far as I can tell. If someone seriously took Jason down a magic based path that removed the DnD alignment chart bullshit, I would be so game to see them come back! Hell I wouldn't even insist on a better cooler design for them!

...though uh, yeah those are the least interesting magic sword designs I've ever seen tbh

Normal Ass Swords

They're alright I guess. Like, there's nothing in it really, but it's not bad?

Guns - Real Bullets

Excellent, evocative yet simple, straightforwards and to the point. It makes hella sense thematically to boot, love this for him, please give him back his pistols and miniguns and shit

Guns - Rubber Bullets

Hate. HATE. hate ick disgusting bad NO.

I just fucking hate rubber bullets, like, as a concept. I refuse to accept "non-lethal" bullets as a valid use of gun, either in real life or in fiction. Guns are for putting many holes in things very fast!!!! If you're gonna use a gun, fucking well own up to that!!! Do not play this silly ass game of pretending that you can change out the material and do the same things as with lead bullets but with the video game status effect of "non-lethal" applied. YOU ARE GIVING PEOPLE SMALL CIRCULAR BRUISES. This is still harmful, yes, ooph ouchie, but it is not even slightly a good use of a gun, you are wasting holster space, and carry weight, and the physical materials used to make it all!!

JUST USE A FUCKING STICK! YOU DON'T RUN OUT OF STICK AMMO!

My belief in his capacity to take out enemies is shattered the instant those fuckers are on panel. Maybe this ain't entirely rational, or realistic to how fights go with rubber bullets IRL, but I hate them so much on principle that I will ignore any counterargument you might have that they'd work. I will die on this hill. Rubber bullets BAD. Please stop making him use this!!

Bombs

Love it, give him more bombs forever

ka-BOOM!!!!

His Brain

This is actually his best weapon - sorry wiggly knife, you're being shunted down to number 2 on a last minute technicality! I think Jason is at his best when he's outsmarting people and making long term fucked up schemes to ruin people's lives.

He's so good at it! It's so fun to watch him do it!

Genuinely a shame that this facet of him was mostly lost after Flashpoint, though to give credit where it is due, in Rebirth Jason did ruin the Penguin's life in an impressively elaborate way, which I did really enjoy. I want to see him be a tactical deliberate menace to one person in specific again idk, that's part of why I do kinda agree that he works better as an antagonist than a protagonist - which it should be noted does not mean I think he works better as a villain necessarily, his ethics aren't what matter here - he's just had his best moments as the schemer, and it's hard to have a protagonist schemer even when you make them ethically the good guy.

I hope you enjoyed my nattering on about Jason's weapons :D thank ye again for ask!

[minnielvr]

future reference - hwang hyunjin

˚ ༘ pairing bf! hyunjin x fem reader

˚ ༘ genre hurt/comfort, angst, fluff

˚ ༘ wc 826

˚ ༘ warnings angst, reader is insecure

˚ ༘ note this shit was hella self indulgent!!

you had just gotten back home after yet another bad day and all you could do was look in the mirror, judging each part of your body. your brain pointing out all of your flaws. the acne on your skin, the frizzy, unbrushed hair sitting atop your head, and so many other things you just hated about yourself.

why does he even love you? what does he see in you thats so special? your boyfriend, hwang hyunjin, was practically sculpted by the greek gods. he's tall, handsome, strong, and oh so sweet. he's everything a woman could ever want on this planet. but for some reason, he chose you. and you did not know why.

of course, you knew he loved you. he says it every day. and if thats not enough, he buys you the most expensive jewelry and the most lavish clothes. not to mention the dates he takes you on, fancy 5-star restaurants all the time. still, you couldn't help but think, why?

with all of the voices in your brain you hadn't heard the door open and close, or the voice of hyunjin telling you he's home. when he walked up to your guys shared bedroom and saw you staring at yourself, he knew what was happening.

"hey sweetie, everything okay?" he asked right by your ear as he snaked his arms around your waist.

"y-yea everythings fine." you tried to get out of his hold, but he didn't let you.

he led you over to the bed and laid you on the bed, then he slipped in next to you. he pulled the covers over you two and grabbed your waist and turned you towards him.

"whats going on in that pretty little head of yours hm?" he asked.

"hyunjin its nothing really. just some stupid stuff." you tried to dismiss the subject.

"hey nothing that you feel is stupid. your feelings are valid okay?" he reminded you. "so, what're you thinkin' about?" he asked once again.

"i just felt..weird today. i started to wonder why you love me." you admitted.

the look on his face was a mixture of shock and sadness, but most of all guilt. how could he let you think like that? now he was angry at himself. had he not been doing enough to show you his love?

you could sense that hyunjin was about to start beating himself up for it, so before he could talk you decided to explain yourself.

"im not saying you don't do enough because you definitely do! i appreciate it really and i love you so much for that. but i cant help but think why me hyunjin? theres so many other girls who're better looking than me and don't act like this. i mean, all the girls in the idol industry are better than me so, why?" you had word vomit, you didn't mean to say that much, but it just came out. and now you could see tears in his eyes.

"y/n..i-i'm so sorry you feel this way. how did i never notice? god i'm such a bad boyfriend." he chuckled at himself while trying to wipe away the tears. and before you could say anything about how its not his fault he continued on.

"i want you because you're...y/n. you better than any girl out there. you're pretty and smart and super funny, but what i love most is that you have the biggest heart ever. more than any of girls in the idol industry. you're so kind to me y/n. you don't love me just for my looks or for my money, you love me for who i truly am. and thats the same reason i love you. you're perfect in my eyes." at this point there was several tears rolling down his cheeks, but neither of you cared.

"hyunjin..." you started at him sweetly and brought a hand to his cheek to wipe away the tears, ignoring your own. "god i love you so much," you chuckled, "what would i do without you?"

"no, what would i do without you, my y/n? my beautiful girl" he embraced you and held you close to his chest. "one day, im going to tell everyone in the world that you're the love of my life okay? im going to yell it out from the top of a building." he said.

you giggled. "one day, i want to be able to call you my husband." you looked up at him from his chest.

his eyes went wide, and so did his smile. "you mean that?"

"of course." you assured him.

"okay then, i know i dont have a ring or anything yet. but just for future reference, will you marry me?" he asked with a big grin.

"hyunjin!!!" you shoved your face back in his chest and laughed. then you looked back up at him.

"just for future reference, yes hyunjin, i will marry you."

[svtdarlingbby]

Seventeen with a gym rat s/o

Svt x gym rat s/o. aka with an s/o who loves the gym as much as these buff babes. also low-key an excuse to post seventeen gym selcas 🫣💪

Seungcheol:

I think Cheol said somewhere that he prefers playing sports vs going to the gym

valid

but since he's with you and wants to spend more time with you he finds himself at the gym

he's pretty impressed by all your knowledge of various workout machines

wanted to impress you though so he suggested lifting weights

he's surprisingly able to lift a lot

but not as effortlessly at you

you found yourself gently correcting his form so he won't get hurt

tbh it was so endearing for Cheol

you babying him was so sweet

after weights you guys decided to have a friendly competition on the stair master

Cheol thought it would be easy, I mean it's just climbing stairs right?

WRONG

he was huffing and puffing meanwhile you were still climbing the infinite stairs effortlessly

it was at that point he considered you a fitness god and told himself that he'd always go to the gym with you

the next day he was soooo sore lol he couldn't get out of bed rip

you couldn't help but laugh

still tho you were nice and rewarded his efforts with some cuddles

Jeonghan:

Jeonghan finds himself going to the gym occasionally but the gym def isn't a huge priority in his life

however since dating you he noticed how much you love going to the gym

so he figured he might as well try it out too

but omg

he's trying sooooo hard to focus on lifting AND THEN THERES YOU

looking hella hot in your gym clothes lifting weights effortlessly

is totally checking you out

and you def notice

"JEONGHAN! NO SLACKING YOU CAN LOOK AT ME ALL YOU WANT LATER BUT FOCUS ON LIFTING!"

ah right-

but he low-key uses this as an excuse to get your attention

"Y/N? is my form right?" he says as he purposely holds the weights weirdly

"Nope, you've gotta hold it like this" you say as you adjust his grasp and form

lol this menace found the perfect way to get you close to him

of course he still actually listens to you and works out

but occasionally he'll try to purposely mess up his form to get you to help if he's extra needy

doesn't care if he's sore the next day

will use this as an excuse to cuddle with you

until you use your muscles to break free of his grasp and haul his ass out of bed

this reminds him that maybe he should continue going to the gym

one day he'll have enough muscles to cuddle you all day

Joshua:

I feel like Joshua goes to the gym more often then he makes it out to be

have you seen this guy's veiny arms??

he's gotta be lifting

he's super happy about having an s/o who also prioritizes the gym

arm day with you is always his fave

just seeing your strong muscles and physique lift the heavy weights just make his heart go crazy

like ughhh mommy/daddy

so he also wants to return the favor by impressing you

puts a lot of effort into lifting, making sure his form is just right

tbh you really do serve as motivation for him

he's been getting buffer since he started dating you

he has the cutest shyest smile when you compliment him

"Wow Josh, you've got arms of steel" you say as you squeeze his bicep

if he could he would melt right there

it means a lot coming from you since you're an expert with all things fitness

def reciprocates too

like you guys would just be chilling and he'd squeeze your arm

"Damn Y/N, you're armed and dangerous"

oh lord he's such a cheeseball

Jun:

y'all did you see limbo? 👀

it's so obvious Jun has worked hard for that body

and it was so convenient that you came into his life at that point

just as he was incorporating the gym more into his routine is when you and him began to date

tbh it was so convenient and Jun really appreciates having you around

Jun doesn't know if his form is correct? don't worry he's got you to fix it

Jun needs someone to spot him when he's bench pressing? you're already there by his side

Jun is experiencing a plateau? you've already got suggestions of different new exercises to try

basically it's because of you and your support he's even more motivated to go to the gym!

also my man Jun also appreciates the view if you know what I'm saying

having you by his side makes him feel even more stronger and powerful

like "yes my s/o is a fitness buff and is helping ME while looking like a snack"

these are just his thoughts tho

in reality he's just snaking his toned arms around your just as toned form, smiling to himself

Hoshi:

ohhh you know he's gonna make you his gym buddy

I meannnnnn have you seen this mans body???

boi loves to workout

will always spot you during arm day

is your biggest cheerleader when you move up in weights!!

"OMG Y/N YOU LIFTED THAT MUCH???!! I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT!"

will literally hug you all sweaty in the middle of the gym lol its a little embarrassing but sooo endearing

also

the fact that you love to work out? you're prob building quite the muscles

Soonyoung isn't shy when it comes to wanting to feel your toned arms

"Whoaaaa since when did you become so buff?" he says infatuated with your arms lol

of course you feel flustered cuz this man does this even in public!!

but low-key his reactions are your motivation to keep up your progress

also he lovesss to take gym selfies

you think his gym selfies are hot? they get even better with you right next to him flexing your hard work

he feels so luckyy

overall he loves that he gets to work out at the gym with a hottie like you

Wonwoo:

I feel like Wonwoo is a subtle guy when it comes to the gym

like yeah it's so obvious he goes to the gym but the gym isn't a huge facet of his life

when he realizes that its quite the opposite for you, he sees this as an opportunity to make more of an effort to make the gym routine

tbh he's amazed at how locked in you are with a routine at the gym

so for the first few days he kinda just copies you lol

he does the same exercises and kinda lets you be

its comfortable silence really

you guys both have your earbuds in doing your own thing while being near each other

of course he'll steal a few glances at you

but he always says its to match your form lolll sure

in private though he's always teasing you in a good way about your muscles

like he'll just randomly approach you, squeeze your muscular bicep, and say something like "close the gyms" in a really deadpan voice

it's soooo cheesy lmaooo but that line never fails to make you feel flustered hehe

Woozi:

have you seen Jihoon lately?

this mans getting b u f f

and having an s/o who's a gym rat like him?

goals

whenever you're getting ready to go to the gym Jihoon always wants to tag along

"Don't you have to produce a song tonight?"

"Nah I can squeeze in a gym session"

he's mainly going because you're going lol

he's def impressed with how fit you are, knowing all the machines and having effortless form

he's like damn I wanna be like that too

ALWAYS brags about this fact to the boys when he works out with them

"What kinda machine is that?" asked one of the guys

"That's a hip abductor, Y/N is a master of that"

also whenever you two are at the gym together

he feels so much more motivated

will def wanna do exercises that involve the both of you

is always down to hold down your feet during sit ups

cardio day you guys are on treadmills side by side

Jihoon won't admit this but when you guys are taking it easy a walking on the treadmills he treats it as if you guys were on a peaceful stroll together

he also won't admit he turns into a blushing puddle whenever you notice his progress

"Dang Jihoon, you're looking buff today" you say as you squeeze his toned biceps

that's it. brb Jihoon is gonna go to the gym to keep up the progress

DK:

I know this man is gonna be obsessed with the fact that you love the gym

he def will use the gym as an opportunity to spend time with you

while also getting buff himself

Seokmin is a total goofball

I can see him asking you for "motivation" during pushups

aka him asking you to lie under him for a kiss for each successful push up

like just look at him in that pic god damn

I meannnn lets just say you both benefited from that

he's also your biggest cheerleader

like when you're lifting weights omg he got the whole gym staring at you with his cheering

"YEAHHHH YOU GOT THIS Y/N!!! WHO'S THE STRONGEST BABE HERE? YOU!!!"

"ohmygodseokminpls"

after you lift the weights he's still gonna be a goofball about it

"now lift me pls" he says holding out his arms to you

you can only roll your eyes but lift him up nonetheless

he's giggling like an idiot and you can only roll your eyes

low-key motivates you to get stronger and vice versa

he wants to pick you up too hehe

he really does make gym sessions so much more enjoyable aww

Mingyu:

man Mingyu really does work out for that hot bod of his

while he love to play sports he also finds himself working out often too

when you came into his life though he thought having you around would motivate him more to go to the gym

because you were already sporting quite the hot body yourself

while you were typically very focused at the gym, once Mingyu came along that changed

of course you always thought Mingyu was hot, but when he's working out

oh my

you feel your face somehow get even hotter despite being all sweaty from working out when you see Mingyu doing all this

WHY IS HE CAKED UP LMAOOOO

while you're over here flustered over him Mingyu gets kinda cocky lol

like when he's spotting you while you're lifting

"Whoa there Y/N, I know I'm making your heart race but you gotta take it easy" he says as he fixes your form

mannn does he make working out hard

or when you're stretching he'll purposely flaunt stretch his arms while you glare as you're trying to hold your stretch

he'll also flex and try to lift the heaviest weights ever to get your attention

thankfully his antics catch up to him as he's superrr sore the next day

but he'd happily use this as a reason for you to take the lead if you know what I mean ;)

Minghao:

Minghao has become quite the fitness buff within the past few years

I mean look at those guns!!

I remember Minghao once said that it is super hard for him to gain muscle and look at him now ughhh

and seeing you succeed with your fitness goals makes Minghao even more proud

going to the gym is like breathing for you guys

you two always go to the gym together

and since you're with Minghao, every occasion has to be a fashion statement

you two are always wearing the coolest, trendiest, gym clothes that still manage to be uniquely your styles

it makes Minghao's heart flutter every time he seeing you wearing the gym shoes he bought you

especially when you're wearing one of his old gym shirts omg this man can barely even focus on working out LMAO and he's like the biggest gym rat out of all these dudes

gym selfies are a priority

his fav ones being the ones where both of you are goofily flexing your muscles

he's always so impressed by how much you can lift too

is soooooo flustered when you lift him up in the middle of the gym

but he secretly loves it so much awww like on the inside he's giggling and kicking his feet in the air haha

but as unserious as you guys act

once it comes to working out, you guys are fitness gods

you two are so focused when you're in the zone lifting or running on the treadmill

it's impressive really

and Minghao is so thankful that you're here to make the gym more fun

Seungkwan:

Seungkwan has found himself going to the gym more often since you came into his life

you would think it's because he wants to live a healthy lifestyle

no

it's because you two are so damn competitive

ever since you told him how many minutes it took for you to run a mile on the elliptical Boo was impressed but decided to challenge you

"Oh yeah? That's pretty impressive, but I can easily do that in less time"

"Oh really?"

"Bet"

so you guys go to the gym

and for you the elliptical is nothing

you look over and see Seungkwan starting to break a sweat in the first five minutes

"Getting tired Boo?"

"Stay in your lane"

god he was so sassy lol

but beating each other in a friendly competition was how you two rolled

of course you ended up winning while Seungkwan was a huffing puffing mess, all red

"Ok I admit it Y/N, you are a fitness god"

that compliment fueled your ego lol but you weren't mean about it

"Here's the prize for second place" you said before you kissed him

"Maybe losing isn't so bad after all" he laughed and hugged you, not minding either of you being sweaty

"Haha loser, let's play some badminton?" you ask

"Always! Now we'll see whose the loser" he smirks

Vernon:

okay first of all why is he wearing denim on denim TO THE GYM??

ANYWAYS kinda like Jeonghan I don't see Vernon prioritizing the gym all that much

but once he starts dating you, he notices that the gym ends up taking a lot of your time

so he's like "heck why not go with Y/N to the gym?"

is ill prepared as you can see in the pic

"Hansol. WHY are you not in your gym clothes?"

"Hm? Oh. Right. Let me snap a pic of my fit before I change"

*facepalm*

once he's changed he's ready to go!

feels kinda lost tho with all the machines

you're about to start lifting when you see Vernon looking confused as he's trying to distinguish a dumbbell from a kettlebell

you think its kinda cute watching his eyes go back and forth between the different types of weights

but you also don't wanna patronize him or anything

"Hansol, why don't you start with a dumbbell?" you say handing an appropriately weighted dumbbell to him

at this point you kind of become like his personal trainer

at first he was just watching you to see what you did with your dumbbell and tried to do the same

once you began to guide him you could tell he was a lot more secure

and he really did look like he was enjoying the workout!

tbh the gym really strengthens your bond this way

Dino:

our boy Lee Chan is obsessed with the gym

I mean look at that body ughhhh 😮‍💨

so when he starts dating you the gym becomes practically your second homes

he's hella impressed with your strength for sure

"Whoa Y/N, how are you able to lift that much?"

he's also kinda cheeky when it comes to stealing glances at you working out

it's leg day and you're doing squats? 👀

he's super subtle about it tho cause he actually takes the gym seriously *ahem Jeonghan*

he also def tries to show off for you

when he's doing arm curls he'll def put extra effort in flexing his biceps when he sees you watching

will also act like the heaviest weights are nothing for him

pays for his cockiness the next day in the form of soreness

this becomes the perfect opportunity for you to cuddle with his muscular self

maybe the gym can wait a few more minutes hehe

[theschizotypalsolilquy]

"Shippers are the only ones who care"

I care that yall are going around calling a man a whore.

And I'd say yall care hella more than us about his sexual endeavors because you're coming around here to our blogs trying to get us to CARE about what you think and believe.

I don't give one single fuck about your wattpad fuckboy agenda.

I'm here to celebrate a bond yall are so threatened by you gotta bounce from blog to blog with your copy and paste ass seeking validation.

And I swear to fucking Zeus, yall have got to let tattoo girl go. That shit was so debunked, the fact that yall cling to it like it's a comfort pillow that you can grind yourself to while moaning about a man you'll never meet with his so-called unwashed dick (according to you) is pathetic.

Like I said, why do YOU care what we think. Seems like yall are the ones with the problem.

You say he has a parasocial relationship with us. It's the other way around, sweetie.

He ain't half naked in bed for you. He didn't send a thirst trap birthday tweet to Jimin for yall to believe he was doing that for you. He ain't watching hours of Jimin content for you.

The other fellow in these pics is who is flexing for.

[shegxox]

unsaid | lookism

getting used to being alone until you met your newfound friends at J high.

notes: hella long, unedited e.e fluff, vasco moments bc i love him, friendship moments, and some '👀' moments as well towards the end.

wc:

a.n: decided to turn this into a series with a scattered plot as well, meaning the timeline wouldn't flow in proper order,

previous : next

SOMETHING was off.

It was oddly peaceful today.

Your hand stopped sketching on your canvas, squinting your eyes in suspicion from the sudden realization. Ever since you got here in J high– specifically after meeting your friends here– there was rarely a normal day.

Rare mostly because of Vasco.

There's no such thing as a quiet day when you're friends with that guy.

He usually bursts through the doors of your classroom every morning just to greet you, or whenever lunchtime draws near he'd suddenly pop out of nowhere and invite you to eat with him together with a bunch of burn knuckles members faithfully trailing behind him.

That's just the fifty percent, the other half goes to the guys at the fashion department.

But today, it seemed like world peace has come and touched today's date for a moment.

No loud greetings from the morning nor lunch invites, you didn't even see Daniel, Mira, Zack– or even Jay with his striking blond hair.

It was definitely odd, you thought to yourself.

Perhaps today is a specially busy day? Exams are drawing near too, so that could be the reason. Then again you barely came out of your classroom today as well. You used your lunchtime to cram your deadlines and have barely eaten much, honestly whenever you start working you just go on and on until someone calls you to pause.

Yeah, that's right.

It really must be a busy day today.

Shrugging to yourself with your formed conclusion, you continued on with your sketch.

"Um, [Name]?" You felt a light tap on your shoulder.

"Hm?"

"This handsome guy from outside wanted me to give this to you. . ."

Handsome?

You finally turned to look at the person talking to you and found them with their hand out and holding a piece of paper.

Was it Daniel? You looked over at your classmate and to the door, but there was no one there. It's either him or Vasco that often visits your classroom

You flashed your classmate a kind smile, taking the paper.

"Thank you, Yeji."

With that, they left your side and went on with their respective work.

Unfolding the paper, your quirked an eyebrow from the message.

It was merely an address of some location and a time specified– 6:00 p.m

It looked shady, but your trust in the message was validated as soon as you recognized Daniel's handwriting and signature at the bottom.

"Ya," you called out to your seatmate, "Do you know what place this is?"

Your classmate turned to you as you showed the paper, subtly covering Daniel's sign with your thumb.

"Ah, that place." They nodded in familiarity. "That's actually a pretty sweet karaoke place."

Question marks immediately formed on top of your head.

"Karaoke?"

"Oh–! if you ever go there they also serve some steaks as well. You have to try the–"

Your classmate's words faded through the background as you started to question yourself.

'Why would they want me to go there?' You wondered as you finish up on your sketch before pulling out your painting materials. 'A special occasion perhaps?'

Sighing, you tried to put the thought at the back of your mind, shifting your focus once again on your project. Though you have to admit, it perfectly played around with your curiosity a tad bit, catching yourself wondering about it every now and then.

"Alright, that's it for today." Your teacher announced. "You are all dismissed– cleaners for today, you know what to do."

"Bye, miss!"

"Thank you, miss!"

You checked the time, there's still an hour and a half before the designated time of the note, what should you do for now?

"I'll stay a bit behind," You told your friend– who was the assigned cleaner for today. "You guys go, I'll clean up after."

"Ah, [Name], you're an angel!" Your friend exclaimed, giving you a quick hug and a playful smooch on the side of your head making you laugh.

"Ya!"

"I owe you one!"

With that, they were out of the room as you continued with your painting. You thought it'd be better to finish it now so you wouldn't have to do much tomorrow since it's the weekend.

"I'll go at 5:30," you uttered to yourself, "Takes 30 minutes to go there anyway. . ."

It was a good plan, except you forgot one thing.

You suck at directions.

And here's one more–

The street where the Karaoke place is?

You've never been there before.

"Fuck." Your eyebrows scrunched together as you look at the GPS on your phone, you're supposed to be facing some shop right now but instead you're facing a dark alleyway.

Timecheck, it's already 5:55. If you don't figure out where you're at right now, you're definitely gonna be late for. . .whatever this is.

"Dammit," You clicked your tongue in annoyance. "How hard is it to find a Karaoke hub with literal neon lights flashing at the front???"

You scratched your head aggressively in irritation, "Where the fuck am I??"

Looking around, the street looked like some scary setting for a horror movie, even worse– it's already getting dark.

You sighed, prompting to call Daniel about your whereabouts. What's the best thing to do when you're lost? Inform your friends, they'll definitely come and find you. . .hopefully.

As you punched in Daniel's number and place the phone on your ear, you just so happen to look up to the skies. Your left eyebrow quirks up from the uncommon sight that you see: balloons.

To be precise, a couple of pink ballons tied together at the end floating away in space.

'Man,' you thought pitifully. 'Whoever kid that let that slip must be crying right now.'

Just as those thoughts came to your mind, you suddenly heard distant cries coming up behind you

"NO! THE BALLOONS!"

"YA! DON'T CHASE THEM, THEY'RE SO FAR UP ALREADY!"

Two voices– the first one sounded so distraught while the other sounded more panicked. They're probably the owners of the balloons that you just saw floating away.

But. . . why do they sound like grown men–

"I CAN'T!" Their voice were getting nearer, they must be right behind you. "THOSE WERE FOR [NAME]!"

Instantly, your eyebrows shot upwards and eyes widened upon hearing your name.

'[Name]?'

Now that you think about it, their voices sound familiar. . .

You whipped your head in their direction, only to be caught in surprise.

"Vasco??"

He was running in your direction as you ended the call on your phone.

"[Name]??" The person behind Vasco cried out your name in surprise.

"Jace??"

"Balloons!" Vasco yelled tearfully as he stretched out his hand–as if doing so would make him able to reach them. Jace finally grabs a hold of his friend's tanktop, making him stop.

"Vasco, [Name]'s here!" He hissed in a hushed tone. "Stop it!"

"But–" Vasco turned to you with a tearful look, pointing at the distant balloons flying higher and higher. "The balloons. . ."

You raised an eyebrow as you placed your hands on his shoulders in an attempt to calm him down.

"Hey, hey– it's just balloons," You assured, soothing his arms with your thumbs. "It's okay. . ?"

"[N-Name], what are you doing here??" Jace intervened. "You're supposed to be at the Ka–"

"But the balloons are for you." Vasco suddenly revealed, tears falling down his face, "And I let them slip away–"

By now, Jace's mouth fell and his eyes turned white from Vasco's words.

"What?" You huffed a laugh, "For me? Why?"

"Cause–"

"AHAHAHA–" Jace slapped a hand over his friend's mouth harshly. "Oh, Vasco! You know him, he has a little crush on you and wanted to get you some!"

You gave Jace a look, ". . .Really? You could do better than that. . ."

"It was supposed to be a surprise." Vasco sulked. "I remembered you saying you wanted them. . ."

Ah.

Your lips parted as realization slowly started to dawn on you.

Surprise. . .

Balloons as something you wanted. . .

But that's for–

You hastily checked your phone and felt your heart pound heavily against your chest.

"You. . ." You uttered under your breath as you gaze at Vasco with wide eyes.

"My birthday. . ."

Jace facepalmed at the background.

Vasco's eyebrows furrowed as he stood up straight, taking your hands with his.

"I'm sorry, [Name]." He says sincerely. "I'll get you more balloons later."

You were still in disbelief from what was happening, "What– When did you–"

"We were supposed to surprise you." Jace sighed, finally deciding to reveal everything. "You said that you never celebrated your birthday so we came up with this."

"Why. . ?"

Why would they ever do this to you? Is your relationship with them even qualified for something like this–

"Why? Cause you're our friend!" Jace said, scoffing a laugh.

A friend.

They consider you as. . . their friend.

Huh.

Your heart throbbed painfully against your chest.

All those years of being alone and being treated like some product instead of a normal human being– they're suddenly flashing in a fast forward motion in your head.

Why now?

Vasco released your hands before taking out something from his pocket.

"Here, these are for you–" Vasco held out a couple of hibiscus in his palms. "The flowers at the store were expensive, so I uh– I just picked these off the street. . ."

Jace sweatdropped, "Vasco. . ."

Weakly lifting your hands in a cupping position, Vasco then placed the flowers on your palm. Most of their petals looked squished–probably because he stored them in his pockets, nevertheless, still beautiful.

You could feel a lump in your throat starting to form, suddenly finding it hard to swallow.

Is it proper to feel like this?

Are you allowed to?

You looked up to Vasco, eyebrows furrowed.

"Vasco. . ."

The man's eyes widened.

"H-Hey, [Name], are you okay?" He asked worriedly, noticing how your eyes suddenly turned glassy. "Do you not. . .like them?"

Jace looked at you as well, concern wrapping his expression.

"[Name]?"

Vasco started to panic, his hands hovering over your form, not knowing what to do.

"S-Sorry! If you dont like them I could just–"

The man's words were cut off as soon as you suddenly threw yourself to him. Wrapping your arms around him, engulfing him in your embrace. You stood on your tiptoes with your face buried on his chest.

For the first time in your life. . .

Are you allowed to feel this happy?

"Thank you." You uttered, before pulling away to look at him once again.

"[Name], you're–"

"This is my first time receiving a gift." You smiled brightly. "The first gift I ever had."

Vasco's eyes soften as he gazed at you, tears flowing down your cheeks.

"So this is what it feels like," You laughed. "I feel so happy."

The two men shared a look before mirroring your smile.

"I'm glad you're happy," Vasco said, placing his big hand on your head, patting it gently.

"I love your gift." You added, holding the flowers close to your chest. "I will treasure it forever."

After all that event, Jace gave Daniel a call and updated him of what happened. Shame that the surprise party was kind of ruined, but even so, it continued.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, [NAME]!" Your friends screamed happily as soon as the door to the karaoke room opened.

Almost everyone was there, giving you bright smiles and genuine expressions on their faces, you could feel butterflies fluttering around your stomach.

"You guys. . ." Your lips curved into a downturned smile, feeling like crying again.

Is this what it really feels like to have others care for you?

You cry either way like before but this time, they were tears of joy.

"Awe, [Name]." Mira approached you with open arms. "Come here."

"Oh, let me join in!" Joy chimed bouncing on her heels before aproaching the two of you.

Daniel stepped forward as well.

"Everyone deserves to be celebrated every once in a while." He smiled. "Thank you for being here, [Name]."

Your lips quivered at his words.

"Ah–" Zoe playfully hit Daniel. "You made her cry!"

"E-Eh???"

"Oh cut the emotional shit!" Zack cried out, standing up on his sit with a mic in hand, smirking.

"Let's get this party started!"

To say that you're happy with today would be an understatement. You're way happier than happy. If you were to describe what you were feeling, it would probably be a mix of all the synonyms of the words happy to form one great word.

You were over the moon.

You felt like you're the sun itself.

It felt too good to be true.

This happiness you feel is something you will hold on to for a long time.

To be surrounded by people who actually care about you makes your heart swell. You've never felt this way before.

"Don't mess this up, you got this." Zack coached you from the side

Jace started to hover his hands on his ears, "Oh god, it's coming."

"Sing from your stomach!" Daniel advised with an excited grin.

"You can do this, [Name]!"

You readied your voice as you held onto the mic tighter.

One, Two–

"–I'M IN MY DREAAAM!"

"WOOO!!"

"LET'S GOOO!"

Chorus of laughter and cheers filled the room, even Jay was dramatically clapping along with the group.

"IU WHO?"

"That was amazing!" Vasco excitedly exclaimed before repeatedly pointing at the songbook. "Let's duet this next!"

"Huh??" Zack made a face. "You can't take that, Mira and I will sing that!"

"Eh? Then just chose another song?"

"No, I can't just do that, it has to be that!"

"Zack. . ."

"Mira, that's our song, right??"

The door to the room suddenly opened and revealed Jay.

"Oh, Jay–" Daniel greeted with an endearing smile. "You're back!"

Jay had stepped out for a moment earlier and has finally returned. The blond gave a small smile and a nod.

He then turned to you, grabbing your attention.

"What is it, Jay."

Suddenly taking something from his side that was out of view, he then held out something and revealed–

"OH MY GOSH!"

You exclaimed, your mouth dropping as you fanned yourself slightly before eagerly making your way to Jay.

"Is this for me??"

The blond nodded.

In his hands, he held a big Alpaca plushie dressed in Gucci that was literally half your size.

"Thank you so much, Jay!" Wrapping your arms around him, you gave him a big hug with the plushie in between the two of you.

"That's so adorable!" Zoe commented, coming in as you pulled away and Jay handed you your gift.

Joy had a look of realization in her face, "So that's what you've been making calls for last night."

"Is this custom-made?" Daniel asked and Jay nodded in reply.

"Ugh, it's so soft!" You exclaimed, hugging the plushie tight.

"Since you're not singing, Mira and I will sing our song!" Zack announced, snatching the mic from Vasco.

"YA!"

The night went on for a few more hours and you're just in complete bliss. Your first birthday celebration is definitely something to remember.

You didn't want it to end, but, alas– some good things come to an end.

As soon as the party was over, half of the people were already drunk–of course, you're one of them.

You didn't know exactly how you even managed to get into your apartment when everything went like a blur to you, you just woke up in your room bedroom and. . .

"What the hell. . ." You murmured to yourself, eyes squinting from the sunlight that was seeping through the window. The hangover– you expected, but your room to be filled with pink balloons floating on your ceiling? You had to check if you were still drunk or dreaming.

Did they do this?

Definitely not, no one can acces your apartment but you.

They can't just decorate your room so suddenly like this?

". . ."

There's only one person you could think of.

As you looked to your side, a large bouquet of roses sat neatly on your nightstand with a black card sticking out in the midst of reds.

Suddenly, you heard a noise just outside your room, and it sounded like someone. . . cooking?

Your eyes widened, hastily getting up from your bed– stumbling on the floor as you did so, you went for the door and almost ripped the hinges from opening it so aggressively.

Your heart dropped to your stomach as soon as you saw the person in your kitchen.

"I see you're awake." They said aloud through the sizzling noises of the pan, not even bothering to look up from their work.

"Did you like the balloons? I remember you liking them like an idiot as a kid."

Your face fell blank. He just had to find you after your birthday huh?

"The roses weren't as fresh as they were yesterday, but they should still be good."

Ah. . .

Since yesterday, huh?

If you your friend's hadn't planned out your party then. . .

"What are you doing here, Gun."

[farmerlesbian]

Hi farmerlesbian,

Lately I’ve been finding it hard to have a sense of lesbian identity. I’ve never done anything romantic with a woman, so what’s the point of identifying as a lesbian? I connect with my lesbianism by interacting with lesbian communities online and engaging with lesbian media but that’s about it. I try to tell myself that my experiences still matter even though I haven’t acted on my feelings for women, but sometimes I feel like I might as well be straight. I’m not really sure where I’m going with this, just wanted to vent. Thanks for being a safe space, I love your blog and I wish you all the best for 2024 :]

ok your instructions are to download a dating app or make a profile on a dating website. message first. interact with people. set times to meet up and hang out. friends or dating or hook up. do it! you got this

yes there's hella covid right now but you can take precautions and be reasonable and safe. you gotta have experiences!

--

i was going to open this by doing the whole "you're valid no matter what, you know yourself, trust your feelings, you don't have to have experience to Know" and while all that is totally true and it's not like Incorrect.. it's not helpful. you gotta get out there, literally. Lesbian isn't like, a fandom to follow or a moodboard to make or a media to watch. it's something you ARE and DO.* and you deserve to have those experiences. it probably will be awkward and weird and messy and silly and you might embarrass yourself and you might make mistakes but at least you're doing stuff! we all do silly stuff and make fools of ourselves!

*obviously a lesbian who has never even held hands with another girl or kissed or had sex or dated or anything is still a lesbian. don't misinterpret what i'm saying.

[c0stass]

Stuck In Your Head

Mark Hoffman x gender neutral reader (no specifics on the readers' body parts. Y/i means your identity, so like good girl, good boy, good dragon, good whatever the reader identifies as lol)

Thanks to @slut4hoffman for the inspiration for this.

CONTENT: CNC(like hella cnc literally do not proceed if you're sensitive to this stuff), Mark being a dick, degradation, praise, violence(slapping, pushing), EVERYTHING IS CONSENSUAL

"Stop acting up. Behave yourself," Mark barked from across the room, having had enough of your shit. You'd been teasing him all day, just to piss him off, because you love his reaction.

"Make me," you giggle as you bite your lip.

"Say that to me again, and see what happens." He walks towards you, taking long strides, until he is standing in front of you.

"Ma-" you start but are interrupted when Mark shoves two fingers in your mouth.

"I've had it up to here with your fucking behaviour."

You gag as his fingers barely graze the back of your throat, and you tighten your lips around them as he slowly moves them in and out.

"I knew this would shut you the fuck up," Mark growls, grabbing your shoulder hard, forcing you down on your knees.

With his fingers still in your mouth, you reach a hand out to his belt. Mark pulls his fingers, dripping with saliva, out of your mouth and smacks your hand away.

"You haven't been good," he says, grabbing your wrist and pulling you back to your feet. His hand makes its way to the back of your neck and he grabs your hair hard, backing you up against the wall. You're trapped as he pushes his body against yours. You whine as he clamps his free hand over your mouth.

"When you're good, then you can have my cock."

You attempt to bite his hand, to which he responds by yanking your head back and smacking your face. He then grabs your chin, forcing you to look at him, his face an inch away from yours.

"Now... are you gonna be good for me?"

"Y.. yes..." You whisper.

"Good y/i."

He releases you and slowly walks away. But you're still feeling a bit bratty. You tip-toe up behind him and pull his hair.

He whips around and pushes you down to the hardwood floor.

"Fuck!" You yell as you hit the hard ground. Mark gets on top with his knees on either sides of you, and pins your wrists down.

"That's it! I'm so fucking sick of you!"

You squirm around underneath him, acting like you don't want him to take total control of your body. He smiles as you wiggle and writhe, feeling completely powerless against him.

"Mark... please..." You beg as he holds you down.

Mark moves your hands onto your chest, crossing your wrists and holding them down with one hand.

"You know how much i don't like it when you do that shit," he yells as his free hand fumbles with your pants. You moan in anticipation as he yanks down on the waistband, pulling them off, leaving you exposed.

He rips open the buttons of your shirt next, leaving you even more vulnerable.

"Is this what you wanted?" He growls, leaning down, his lips against your ear.

"Yes..." You gasp breathlessly.

Mark smiles. He always needs some form of validation from you. Otherwise, he isn't into it.

"Good y/i."

In one swift motion, he flips you onto your stomach, pinning your hands behind you with one hand as he begins to undo his pants with the other.

You struggle beneath him but he's too strong. Kicking your legs, you manage to nail him in the lower back with your heel.

"Knock it off!" He yells, gripping you tighter. "Stay right there. Don't you move."

Mark stands up, pulling your pants the rest of the way off. You lie still on the floor, your hands behind your back, shaking in anticipation and excitement. As you feel your clothes stripped away, you hear Mark's clothes rustling as he undresses. Then he is back on top of you like he was before. His knees on the floor on either side of your thighs, leaving you unable to move your legs.

"You're so good for staying still," he purrs. You can feel his throbbing erection resting between your thighs. You're immediately needy for it.

"Are you gonna be a good y/i for me?" He asks.

"Yes.... yes Mark..." You whine in a low, almost whispering voice.

"Good..." Mark says softly as he presses the tip of his cock against your opening, slowly pushing inside, allowing you to adjust to his size.

"Oh god... fuck!" You wail, feeling his thick shaft stretching you as he slowly moves in and out.

"Fuck... you just get tighter every time..." Mark groans, gripping your wrists tighter, moving faster, deeper.

"Maaaark!" You whine, struggling against his grip. Your body twitches, you can already feel yourself starting to get close....

He yanks your head up by your hair.

"Shut up," he barks, "shut up or I'm not gonna let you cum."

Obeying him, you keep quiet as his skin smacks against yours and you feel the orgasm slowly creeping up. Your whole body is tingling with pleasure as you struggle not to make noise.

Mark picks up speed, sending you over the edge. He groans as he feels you clench around him, your whole body shaking, you gasping for breath.

"Fuck..." he grunts as he releases himself deep inside you, filling you up.

Standing up, he pulls you to your feet. Your legs shake as you feel his warm seed dripping out of you, down your thighs. Mark grips your wrists tightly.

"Now.. don't piss me off again," he says in a low but firm voice.

Releasing his tight grip on you, he turns and walks away, turning around to smile at you for a second as he walks out.

[oddballwriter]

Moon Boys with a Trans Reader

꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦

Warnings: some mentions of dysphoria and transphobia from others 

Author’s Snip: I just had this idea come into my mind randomly last night and I almost got up just to write it but it was already hella late and I'm working on trying to wake up early for my upcoming semester. Thankfully I managed to remember just now so I'm writing it now.

I’ll shut up now. Enjoy! And don’t be afraid to request.

꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦

Steven Grant

Our sweetie man <3

I know I always say this but I feel like with Steven, but I feel like learning something and researching something about you or what you like is sort of a love language/show of affection and caring

So when he meets you (or you come out as trans to him) he takes time to learn some things so that you can feel more comfortable and also works on saying things properly like getting your pronouns right and the like

Steven always compliments people but he makes sure to compliment you the most. You always hear the words "beautiful/handsome" and "lovely/dashing" coming out of him

If he ever sees you looking at yourself in the mirror to check your outfit and you look slightly unsure about how you feel about it then he comes up behind you says you look great in it

If you ever feel dysphoric and have one of those days where you just don't feel like your body is reflecting who you are right, he understands in the best way he can and consoles you

"I still think you're beautiful/handsome. And it's okay if you aren't feeling that way today. You'll always be great to me."

If anyone misgenders you or uses the wrong pronouns while he's with you, he politely and quickly corrects them. He doesn't want to formulate it like they did it on purpose, he just does it quietly

He will, however, although not a fan of confrontation, tell someone to act properly if they're causing problems

Marc Spector

He's also really great

Marc takes a bit of time getting used to everything but that's just because he wants to make sure that he doesn't do anything that hurts you or makes you upset

He tries his best to help you with dysphoria and any other issues that you deal with as a trans person

"You're a woman/man to me. And, wow, are you a pretty/handsome one."

The flirt seems a bit out there but he's trying to help you by letting you know that your identity is valid to him and that he sees you in that light and always will

Not afraid to break someone's nose if they call you something nasty or say something

This man would get into a full on fist fight for you and he means that

Marc hardly speaks how he feels, except for when he thinks you look pretty and hot, which is all the time. The only emotion he voices is his attraction to you

In case someone does a double take because you don't have a corresponding voice to your appearance yet, he looks at them with a stern "What? You have a problem?" face

Jake Lockley

Marc would get in a fist fight with a transphobe... but Jake would get in a knife fight

Jake takes it upon himself to protect you if need be. Not saying that Steven and Marc wouldn't protect you too but with Jake all he really knows how to do outside of be your loving boyfriend is be a guard dog

It's his Ken job /j

If you ever feel dysphoric he places you in front of a mirror, points at your reflection, and goes "You know what I see? A hot ass woman/man. And I get to see her/him all the time."

He buys you a lot of things. Like clothes that you enjoy, perfumes/cologne, all the things you could want and make you feel more like you

Flirting comes naturally to him and he frequently calls you pretty, of course in Spanish and english

Makes it clear to everyone that you're a woman/man and if someone says something then we've already established what he'll do

[starsha-stardust]

The overwhelmingly negative reception to Wish must be studied in the future because I have never seen a Disney movie get constantly critiqued and nitpicked to the tiniest of things as much as it and as I've said before I simply do not believe the film warrants it. People were writing YouTube essays on why the animation and the main character suck before the movie even came out. I've seen people point out supposed issues in the film that have existed in dozens of previous films but never got brought up until now..

For example, Moana follows the Disney princess story formula to a T, has a far more "adorkable" heroine, has no threatening villain, an animal sidekick who only exists to make funny faces and noises, and pretty much the only songs I see people talk about from that film are How Far I'll Go and You're Welcome... And these are all things people have critiqued Wish for but were dead silent about back then.

And the last thing I want to say is that while I do believe a lot of the criticisms of Wish are valid, I believe they are both exaggerated in how much they actually effect the bigger story and most importantly... the POSITIVES of Wish are almost never spoken of? Like no one else thought the villain was hella entertaining? That Star was loveable and it was impressive how they moved the plot without even speaking? That Asha was an active and passionate protagonist with a lovely singing voice? No one liked all the woven in Easter eggs to past Disney classics?

If only the flaws of something are ever pointed out and never it's strengths people's perception of that thing will be flawed. It will always be ironic to me that the first 2d incorporated disney film in over a decade.. the first Disney film with a classic villain in over a decade.. a film uniquely crafted to celebrate Disneys anniversary, is being branded as generic more than anything else. And people are refusing to go see it and even taking part on the "critiquing" (after stating they haven't seen it!) because if all that's being said is that it sucks it must be true right? I strongly feel Wish deserves better.

[anti-terf-posts]

Hi! I'm a nonbinary teen, and I'm on my period and feeling really dysphoric. Any tips/validation for all of us that have a period and don't identify as women? LOVE this blog btw!

hey there! don't think I can be of much help, so I'm going to leave it up to the lovely people who come across this post to help you out :)) if you guys see this post and have any tips for alleviating dysphoria while you're on your period, please feel free to put it somewhere in the notes!

although, I do have two pieces of advice for you that work for me personally

my first is to dim the lights in the bathroom when you're cleaning up (if that's possible for you). It can help make everything "less visible".

my second piece of advice is always remember that there are some hella masculine and burly non-women out there who get periods, and it doesn't make them any more feminine. after all, you have to be pretty tough to be able to fight your way through a period.

anyways, that's unfortunately all the advice I can offer, so anyone else, please feel free to help this person out in the notes!! that would be greatly appreciated :))

[nevermindirah]

Who talks to who, for how long and about what, in The Old Guard (2020) dir. Gina Prince Bythewood?

I got curious and so I watched the movie taking a lot of timestamp notes. way back three and a half years ago now, I watched this movie for the first time bc I like gritty action movies, and it's a really good one of those. I'm still obsessed with it all this time later because it's full to the brim with well-drawn characters who have compelling relationships with each other, and boy howdy does the data show it.

I was especially curious about who spends how much time alone together on screen, so I coded all the scenes with that in mind, and I found some really interesting patterns in the breakdown of scenes where just two characters talk, where one character is the sole focus, and when three characters talk.

the winners of course are Nile and Andy, our dual protagonists, who spend 10% of the movie's total runtime alone together. they also spend a lot of time with our dual friendly antagonists, Booker and Copley. scenes featuring combinations of just these four characters make up 40% of the total runtime.

Joe and Nicky show up less in this analysis because they're side characters who mostly appear in group scenes, but wow are they richly drawn side characters. they're key players in all but two scenes where four or more named characters talk.

read on for many numbers and much analysis of what it all means!

Andy Nile 0:12:20 Nile Booker 0:06:00 Andy Booker Copley 0:05:22 Andy Booker 0:05:01 Andy Nile Booker 0:04:56 Nile Copley 0:04:18 Nile alone 0:04:07 Andy alone 0:03:31

Andy Celeste 0:02:49 Merrick Copley 0:02:41 Joe Nicky 0:02:24 Nile Dizzy Jay 0:01:33 Andy Quynh 0:01:31 Andy Nile Merrick 0:00:52 Booker alone 0:00:32 Copley alone 0:00:28 Nicky Kozak 0:00:27 Booker Quynh 0:00:21 Copley Keane 0:00:09

(the spreadsheet, if anyone's interested in digging deeper with me)

of the 12 min that our main characters are alone together on screen, almost fully half is super duper antagonistic:

4:26 is the kidnapping sequence

1:29 is their conversation outside after Nile's nightmare featuring the iconic "me and those three men in there will keep you safe" "like Quynh?"

and 7 seconds is Nile glaring daggers at Andy after walking over all those bodies in the church

the other half breaks down like this:

2:14 is them connecting over their mortal families — where Andy makes Nile give her phone back at the end

1:45 is Nile telling Andy she's not doing this, that she's going back to her family — Andy pushes with "we'd do the same for you" but then relents and gives Nile the car

50 seconds of them gearing up for the last segment of the fight — Nile tries to get Andy to wear a bulletproof vest, she jokes around with "is this gonna be like the last signal?" — it's operations-focused but there's a real warmth between them by this point in the movie (this scene starts at 1:41:45, just 13 min before the credits roll)

and 1:29 of Andy looking at Nile like she hung the moon (which, extremely valid and relatable!) and Nile saying that the time Andy's got left "you're gonna spend it with us"

Nile has an uninterrupted 4:18 sequence with Copley that speed runs the same general shape of her arc with Andy, hella antagonistic to teamwork, though the latter here is more of a professional camaraderie than the real warmth we see Nile develop for Andy.

in this context Nile's arc with Booker is remarkably different. their first scene alone together is 1:11 in total, intercut with Andy killing mercs elsewhere in the church, and it's sort of their only scene with friction between them. Booker keeps telling Nile to wait for the signal without explaining what that means, annoyingly continuing Andy's grand tradition of not fucking answering Nile's reasonable questions, ugh. though another way of framing this is of course that he's too busy packing her a change of clothes while showing off his tits for her. as I noted in a previous meta, the end of this sequence is the one time Booker lies to Nile (claiming he doesn't know who the mercs are when he has at least a basic idea, though we don't know for sure whether Copley involved him in this specific plan).

after this Nile and Booker have two more scenes alone together and they're both extended conversations: 3:14 for their conversation alone in the cave after Andy leaves, and 1:18 when Nile joins Booker on the balcony outside the bar. both of these conversations are remarkably intimate for how little these characters have interacted beforehand. remember, 6:02 total of Nile and Andy alone together with heavy animosity (Andy shot Nile in the head ffs!) before things between them started to warm up. granted, the conversation where they first start to warm to each other is right after Nile's cave scene with Booker and Andy's scene with Celeste, so an argument could be made that this was the point in the movie where Nile started to feel ready to open up to the other immortals generally and her first one-on-one conversation once she got there was with Booker before Andy. I'm not saying you have to ship them just because they get so close so quick, but the numbers sure do make it clear that us BoNers aren't making this shit up out of nowhere.

Nile and Booker's heart-to-heart in the mine is the third-longest one-on-one conversation in the whole movie — third after Andy kidnapping Nile and Nile's sequence with Copley, which are both heavy on action and exposition and antagonism, making this the longest intimate conversation in the movie. their other heart-to-heart, 1:18 on the balcony outside the pub, is on par with Joe and Nicky's 1:17 in the van.

there's also a 51 sec sequence during the Merrick tower fight where it intercuts pretty much equally between three subsets of the action: Andy going off on her own with an axe, Joe waiting for Nicky to wake up after that head shot, and Nile and Booker being drift compatible when Nile's gun jams. we're not making this shit up out of nowhere.

ok back to our blorbos in chief. we get 4:07 of Nile as the sole focus, and 3:31 of the same for Andy.

the sequence of Nile going through hell on base just because she fucking lived (laser eyes @ her squad forever) lasts 1:14 and includes a few lines from minor characters. we get 15 sec of her first dreaming of the others and waking up unmoored, then a 20 sec reprise with her nightmare of the first person she killed. the sequence of her driving away from Copley's then figuring out what the empty gun clip means is 48 sec. and then, one of the things that stood out to me the most in really digging into these numbers: just how frequently and for how long the camera lingers on Nile's face in this movie.

extended closeups of Nile with no dialogue and no montage:

10 seconds staring at the car she crushed, killing Merrick in the process but somehow not herself

36 seconds in the elevator

and a whopping 44 seconds of listening to Frank Ocean

that's fully 1 minute and thirty seconds of this movie's 2 hr 5 min credits-included runtime devoted exclusively to long takes of Nile Freeman's face.

Andy's sole-focus time is a little less tidy, because the majority of it isn't precisely focused on her like with Nile. we get 15 sec of her staring at her hand, realizing her immortality is gone. I could have coded all the pieces of the movie more granularly to find all the moments where we get Andy reaction shots, but I also could've done that with all of them and I'm but one humble spreadsheet lover, and it's more interesting to me that Gina primarily uses other kinds of film language to put us into Andy's perspective.

1:35 of her cutting through all those mercs in the church — other people are active in this scene, but they're not shown as people, and the horror of that is exactly the point, for the viewer, for Nile, and for Andy herself

41 sec of her voiceover at the opening of the movie, over clips of the kill floor scene

1 min of her moodily sitting in the car after the pharmacy and flashing back to Lykon's death

the Andy/Quynh flashback sequence that's a subset of Nicky and Joe narrating to Nile is 1:31, so counting that alongside this flashback here brings us to a total of 2:31 of Andy/Quynh(/Lykon) alone together screen time. almost precisely equal to Joe and Nicky's total 2:24 alone together.

further underlining Booker and Copley as our tritagonists, we get one scene of on-screen alone time for each of them: 32 seconds of Booker being drunk six months later and 28 seconds of Copley reacting to the kill floor footage. it's easy to focus on the Andy in a Union uniform element of this Copley scene, but a photo of his late wife is visible in almost every frame. I went back and double checked — only 3 sec of those 28 don't contain that photo of his wife displayed proudly between the kill floor footage and the Civil War photo, 3 sec of Copley in closeup. now that's what I call environmental storytelling.

we get almost exactly 5 min each with the sets Andy + Booker + Copley, Andy + Booker, and Andy + Nile + Booker. ABC and ANB conversations tend toward driving the plot and fleshing out detail about immortality, though a decent chunk of ANB in the "is this a Rodin?" part of the cave scene is Nile and Booker talking about following the money (their first moment of drift compatibility!) while Andy angsts nearby, and a decent chunk of ABC at Copley's place is Andy and Booker's heartbreaking "this is what you wanted" "not like this" exchange while Copley awkwardly hovers. just under half of Andy and Booker's 5:01 on screen alone together is about his betrayal, 2:13 across three scenes. the other half breaks out pretty evenly between them talking about Nile, making battle plans, and just being pals.

has any mid-budget gritty action movie ever done it better? even the infodumps are full of character and relationship details.

I also find it noteworthy that Booker and Copley are never alone together, and they never directly acknowledge anything about their relationship. we know from what they tell other characters that they've been in contact before the events of the movie, probably for some time in some detail. we know they worked together to ultimately enable the cartoon-villain antagonists to do their villainy. Copley is direct about how these results were absolutely not what he intended, and we can infer from Booker's behavior that he wasn't aiming for decades of medical torture either. but we get no information about how they feel about each other. now that I'm looking at it with this frame, it seems like the absence of information is itself a kind of telling — Booker and Copley maybe purposefully avoiding 1:1 contact, purposefully treating each other as mere acquaintances when others are around, because to do otherwise would be to look their guilt in the eye. oh shit I think I might have given myself a whole new meta idea on this tangent here: Copley and Booker as mirrors for each other.

disclaimer as we're nearing the end that there's inevitably going to be bias and error in something like this. I measured by seconds not milliseconds and I wasn't always precise about where I paused to note timestamps at scene changes. sometimes I included what ended up amounting to several seconds of establishing shots and sometimes I didn't. and there are a bunch of edge cases where there's more than one way to count who was an active part of which scenes, like for example:

I separated out Andy and Booker's opening motorcycle stalking and Don Quijote chat from the later part of what was probably just one scene in the script, where Booker talks to the hotel clerk while Andy interacts with tourists nearby

I included all as one Nile + Dizzy + Jay scene the sequence where Dizzy and Jay talk to each other about Nile before they go into the med tent and act shitty to her face about how Nile's still alive

I counted as Copley + Merrick the conversation in the car where Keane and Kozak are present and react on camera but don't have lines per se

similarly I counted as Andy + Booker the "she wants to talk to her family" exchange after Nile and Nicky leave the dinner table; Joe's still sitting there next to them but he doesn't say anything and the camera doesn't focus on him

I didn't try to delete the time where Andrei said/did stuff from the 4:26 Andy kidnaps Nile sequence but I did remove a Keane cut-away from a later Andy + Nile scene

so much has already been lovingly written about how well Joe and Nicky spend their short on-screen alone time and rightly so. I don't have anything new to add there so I'll take a moment instead to shout out to the 27 sec of Nicky telling Kozak to go fuck herself, and also the iconic Joe headbutting Merrick. fuck, this movie is so so good. every moment is a delight.