ambassadorofreconciliation-blog

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A Story About Love

I sat for three hours with an elderly woman who gave a generous donation to my non profit.  She told me, "You know, I'm for marriage equality now." I asked her "Why?" She said, "Two years ago my husband died. Two years before that we knew he was dying. He was very ill. I prayed for God to take me first. Since he's passed, I've understood what it's like to be alone. And that's what I've been asking of gay people. It's not about sex. I miss his companionship, having someone i can trust, someone to be there when you're sick, and someone to make those life and death decisions for you when you can't. I lived a long, loving life with my husband and I don't want to bar someone from the happiness I had." 

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Struggling With Forgiveness

I haven't written here in a while. When I created it I was hoping to write short inspiration pieces regularly. I've seen been hired to write for new publications so my time has been swallowed up by that.  I've been wanting to write about forgiveness for about a year now.  I wanted to study the Bible and give biblical support to why people who have been hurt by the church should forgive. I wanted to help build that bridge for the millions of people who have felt "othered" in the name of Christianity.  I studied the bible, i understand the biblical case but i'm struggling with forgiveness.  I've had a lot of people in my life hurt me and the majority of them have been Christians. I'm thankful for my experiences because they've shaped my identity. Without them, I wouldn't be who I am today. But i'm still having trouble with forgiving.  The thing about forgiveness is that it's never on our terms. Christ doesn't ask us to forgive only when your offender agrees to certain caveats. All he asks is to forgive with no strings attached. I don't know about you, but that's been incredibly hard for me.  I think it's because without the apology I don't feel like my feelings were validated. That forgiving without the tangible "I'm Sorry", I have relininqueshed what little power I had over the situation in holding a grudge. I have to just give it up.  This is a reoccurring theme in scripture that sucks for a control freak like me. Do you have a burden? Give it up to God. Are you dealing with worries for the future? Give it up to God.  Is your financial struggles causing you stress? Give it up to God.  God fights with me for the things I don't want to give up. I feel Him fighting me as I white knuckle onto the things I wish to control. But I guess that's why i'm limited and He's infinite. I can only ever hold on for so long before God finally takes it away from me. 

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In order to have a fair, balanced, and academic dialogue, more than one view must be present. We all step into more growth, more love, and more humility when we listen to the diversity of voices that make up the family of God....

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“Now there is a final reason I think that Jesus says, "Love your enemies." It is this: that love has within it a redemptive power. And there is a power there that eventually transforms individuals. Just keep being friendly to that person. Just keep loving them, and they can’t stand it too long. Oh, they react in many ways in the beginning. They react with guilt feelings, and sometimes they’ll hate you a little more at that transition period, but just keep loving them. And by the power of your love they will break down under the load. That’s love, you see. It is redemptive, and this is why Jesus says love. There’s something about love that builds up and is creative. There is something about hate that tears down and is destructive. So love your enemies.”

― Martin Luther King Jr., A Knock at Midnight: Inspiration from the Great Sermons of Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr.

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"For anyone who believes that homosexuality is an alternative lifestyle, I am truly a testimony to let you know right now that you are under demonic control."

"If we allow homosexuals to bring their lovers into church, and we start letting teach them sabbath school, you're allowing demons to come in with them and to engage with your children...." Help me urge GYC to take down this presentation.

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I discount the systematic injustice that leads to the mainstream media feeling more comfortable hearing my story through the mouth of a white cis straight man, instead of my own.

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We're Getting it Wrong With LGBT Youth

“For anyone who believes that homosexuality is an alternative lifestyle, I am truly a testimony to let you know right now that you are under demonic control…If we allow homosexuals to enter in the church and help out, we are allowing demons to enter the church and influence our children” I'm surprised that I'm surprised These are the things that were said at the Seven-Day Adventist General Youth Conference. These are the things the SDA church are telling YOUTH.  We're getting it wrong and we're putting lives at risk.

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When an SDA Pastor Promotes Violence Towards LGBT Folk

“Our stand is ‘zero tolerance’ to this vice and to western influence on this crucial issue because God says no to it. We are together with the President and the Speaker and we fully support the Anti-Homosexuality Bill. I call upon all religious ministers, all Ugandans, and all Africans to say no to Homosexuality. Let us stand for our sovereignty as Ugandans and as God fearing people even [though] the heavens fall.” -Pastor Blasious Ruguri, East-Central African Division President and A Vice President of the Seventh-day Adventist church.  This is absolutely disgusting. This pastor and VP of a conference of the Seventh-day Adventist Church vocally supported this law in 2012-- even while it included legally killing gay people.  THIS is religious homophobia.  The general conference of the SDA church should take a stand against their employee as he vocally supports breaking multiple commandments. SDA Kinship have issued a response to the recent happenings in Uganda urging our church leaders to take an active stand against these crimes against humanity. 

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When a Pastor Read My Article

A friend tweeted the link to my latest article "At Home In The House Of God" and got a message from his pastor:

"Just wanted to thank you for the link you posted on Twitter with The Adventist person. What I found helpful is the "talking with" versus "talking at" or "talking to" piece. It's something I need to do more of.

I am fairly orthodox in my understanding of Scripture's voice on homosexual practice, but I try hard to find ways to be generous in my orthodoxy. So it was good to read how certain phrases that many use - and that, if I am honest, I probably use - can be taken as offensive and hurtful.

You and I likely disagree on whether or not homosexual practice is sin, but I am hopeful that I can articulate my understanding of Scripture without being automatically offensive to those who disagree."

This is progress.

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I had forgotten what it’s like to feel safe around Christians, and this conference was unapologetically Christian. 

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I have a lot of pent up frustrations with the southern community. I've had my car vandalized with the word "FAGGOT" written across from it. I've even walked into a gas station and have had someone call me an abomination.  Things started to change this time a Redneck came up to me and said "I'm a redneck and I'm sorry."

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A Message From a Seventh-day Adventist Pastor

"Well, I read both articles. They are both very good. I would lie if I did not say that the one about the seminary did not sting a little bit. I wish that was not how the day had gone. Again I am sorry."

A seminarian student messaged me this today after reading my tumblr post on the straight pastor at the GCN Confernce and my piece on the seminary presentation-- "Go and Sin no More". This student recognized me in the chapel that day and came over to apologize. He was visibly heartbroken by what had taken place. Crying, he told me he was incredibly sorry.

The following day we got together for lunch. He asked me about my story. I told him and after about an hour of him not speaking I asked him if everything was ok?

He said "Yes, thank you so much for sharing your story. I just came here to listen"

This is the kind of pastors our church needs.

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My friends David and his boyfriend Phil worshiping together openly praying with the person they love. 

This matters.  #GCNconf

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My guest blog piece for the Marin Foundation. Check out my thoughts on the mantra "Go and Sin No More"

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Lord, make me an instrument of your peace, Where there is hatred, let me sow love; Where there is injury, pardon; Where there is doubt, faith; Where there is despair, hope; Where there is darkness, light; Where there is sadness, joy. O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console; to be understood, as to understand; to be loved, as to love. For it is in giving that we receive. It is in pardoning that we are pardoned, and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life. Amen. -Prayer of Saint Francis

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"At all times and in all places, in all sorrows and in all afflictions, when the outlook seems dark and the future perplexing, and we feel helpless and alone, the Comforter will be sent in answer to the prayer of faith. Circumstances may separate us from every earthly friend; but no circumstance, no distance, can separate us from the heavenly Comforter. Wherever we are, wherever we may go, He is always at our right hand to support, sustain, uphold, and cheer." {Desire of Ages 669.4}