gentlytakemyhand-blog

[gentlytakemyhand-blog]

a convo between dave n bro

dave: hey john, you ever heard of an irish wolfhound?

john over the webs: no, dave. i have not heard of an irish wolfhound. what does this have to do with what we were just talking about though?

dave: well you see john

dave: irish wolfhounds are these massive dogs that can be 6ft on four legs and 10ft on two

dave: theyre hounddogs so theyre known for slender features too

dave: but look at this my friend

dave:

dave: it can carry not one BUT TWO dogs on its back and STILL go on a leisurely walk

john: dave what

dave: they were all just chillin in ireland

dave: helpin people hunt wolves

dave: they were pretty great at coralling hoarses

john: what

dave: hourses wait

bro: *reading over dave's shoulder* Why the fuck do you always add letters where there shouldn't be? I've never understood that part of your irony. *leans in and types for dave*

dave: *Hornses you pieces of shit

john: LOL

dave: *has the hardest time not laughing irl* goddammit bro wtf why is he such a god who gave him the right thats it im done im out

dave: im just gonna dig a ditch of ownage and sit in it while my bro buries me in his awesomeness

john: doesn't that mean you'd suffocate and die in there?

dave: perhaps

dave: but itd so be worth it

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I don’t like the idea that I’m not in control of my life. The Matrix (1999)

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they/them is a lot better than the feeling of assumption. it's kind of like the way-station for pronouns.🤣 you can have a convo with the individual themselves about their pronouns, but until then, neutral is nice.🤠

😱🤯 im just gonna. go a smidge ranty. it's my style (tho, this is my 1st time doin sj work but ynot😅), but up🔝 is my answer.😊 otherwise, enjoy! 🤯😱

in our cis-based society, pronouns can define how a person is treated by others. its especially true if you don't fit a cookie cutter mold and get cut... but that's not to say that one pronoun is better than another, just as i don't say that red is brighter than blue. we all must remember that everything is perceptual. to each their own. in our cis-based society, there are 2 molds for gender that are considered "normal": red and blue.

with red and blue as the pinnacle of our glorious myriad of gender colors, we can now choose red or blue for: birthdays, clothing, pronouns, and how people get treated by others.

i stop at the last one for impact because that's what i want to matter to you, the reader. let me tell you a story on why pronouns do matter.

a boi is doin his work as a customer service agent, restocking shelves, minding his business, waiting for a customer to ask him a question because it's inevitable.

"ma'am!" he hears from behind him. he doesn't believe that's about him because he's a dude, so he doesn't respond. he feels someone tap his shoulder and he spins around to find a young woman.

"excuse me, ma'am? can you not hear me? i'm right behind you!" she exclaims at him and his eyebrows furrow.

he puts on his customer service smile and bows ever so slightly because he's an anime weeaboo nerd. "sorry, what do you need help with?" he says in a deeper voice than what she thought was going to come from his pretty lightly-glossed lips.

she looks slightly startled and confused, but continues with her questioning, using his incorrect pronouns. he bares it with a smile because it's not like he's gonna see her again. he doesn't want to cause a fuss, make a scene. he's afraid that if he corrects her, she'll blow up about how he's wrong about his own gender and that he's "just confused." it's happened more than 10 times before this. he doesn't want to take the chance, however each time she uses the wrong pronoun, it takes him back to those times.

by the end of the exchange, he feels emotionally battered and she leaves with a smile, knowing where she needs to go, telling the poor boi, "you were very helpful, honey. if only you answered me when i was first calling you."

and she leaves.

he looks down at his hands. they... they look masculine... right? they're boney, yet muscular from how much he lifts bags with his fingers in this job...

he feels at his face. he supposes his cheeks are a bit rounder than most... but is that what makes him look feminine? he's not even wearing any make-up today...

he whips his ponytail. oh, right. his undercut ponytail. but that's so popular for men his age now. he's workin it because hair is pretty changeable.

he sighs, thinking about how he's only supposed to spend 30 seconds stocking a box to a shelf and he wants to get back to the backroom soon...

he kneels to pick up his now empty box that he dropped after his first exchange only to have his second exchange suddenly show up behind him, shoving his personal space bubble up against the aisle wall.

"excuse me, miss. can you tell me where the bathrooms are?" a well-to-do business man in his evening suit questions politely from 1ft away.

feeling awkward, but not wanting to lose gtound or make the customer feel awkward, he gufaws. he collects himself quickly, clearing his throat, before responding "well, bruh, the bathrooms are-" and he explains to the business man where the bathrooms are and how to get to them.

the business man eventually looks confused by the end of the explanation and the boi questions re-explanation. "are you a man or a woman?"

he blinks a few times, sliding his palm over the top of his head to smooth out the hair leading to the ponytail in a strained manner. "excuse me?" he growled through gritted teeth.

the man blinks a few times, realizing what he had just asked. "no, i- you're very pretty."

ok, now the kid is just getting pissed. "i'm a man, but thank you." he says sternly, almost as if scolding. "now if you'll excuse me, sir, i need to get back to stocking. i'm working on a time limit. i wish you a good night." he bows to the business man, giving him a once over before turning and going back to his cart of items in a lackadaisical hoodrat manner.

the business man didn't question it. he left, looking confused with himself.

the boi stood by his cart, trying to meditate to breaking down his box. he begins to refind his zen, waiting for a customer to ask him a question because it's inevitable.

yup. every day life.

as john mulaney puts it "same sh*t as always."

btw that's a story from me. that stuff happens a lot... legit every day life.

people tell me "if you want to be seen as a man so badly, then act like one!" do you know how many dudes have died doin fraternity dares? i'm good. i don't have to prove my masculinity to anyone. as long as i feel like myself at the end of the day, that's what truly matters.

@ people who prefer different pronouns. Can we call you they/them til we learn what you want? I guess it would probably be rude to assume it was he or she before knowing for sure

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idk what my aesthetic even is.

but i love it. c:

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legit have had all of these doubts, but my friends keep me confident and going. idk where id be without the friends i have TnT

I’m not a very good gate keeper. But I think I can live with that Happy Trans day of visibility! <3 <3 <3

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nf pure color saturation is totes for me tho, so go ahead n send all that bright obnoxious color my way XD legit, i live for it

i got really mad at red today

[gentlytakemyhand-blog]

I'm live on Twitch, come hang out! http://www.twitch.tv/apollo524413?sr=a

[gentlytakemyhand-blog]

I'm live on Twitch, come hang out! http://www.twitch.tv/apollo524413?sr=a

me playing melodica at 10pm while my best friend is driving us around and also loving our city so much that they hate the government so much XD so warning: my best friend is v politically feuled, but its the only type ill love cuz its passionate and so friggin extremely caring. i love you so much moimoi!!!

[gentlytakemyhand-blog]

I'm live on Twitch, come hang out! http://www.twitch.tv/apollo524413?sr=a

[gentlytakemyhand-blog]

haji and merc~

more so genji n mccree relat comin out XD

also, thinking about Soldier:26.

sad thing is, there was originally a Soldier:26, but they gone now.

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this

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Lizard time

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My experience with Lil Cal

so, story time.

i have this lil cal doll/backpack that i got at this we love fine booth at wondercon a few years back. maybe back in 2014? but so, i had it and i actually wore it as an actual backpack for a bit, carrying my sparse amount of things that i carry. i got a lot of compliments on it actually, random people who werent homestucks actually said “cute backpack!” and i was like “haha thanks!” little did they know

but so. i leave it in my room and i come back. to find it in a different position. (mind you, i have no pictures of this because i never thought about it) but like. i started to freak out a little because. this is lil cal we’re talking about. and so i put it into a bin, close the bin with a lid, and go to sleep. i wake up, he’s still in the bin. thank god, right? i leave the room and go about my day. i come back to my room and find that hes sitting outside of the bin. and im like “wtf” so i put him back in the bin

he then stayed in the bin until further notice

meanwhile, i go to the del mar fair with my parents and we get these things based on the phase of the moon that we were born under. turns out i was born under a really rare moon to be born under, the dark moon. i was born about 4-5 days before the next new moon. this is where i also find out, that my mom and i were born under the same moon. the dude at the counter was actually fanning so hard at this moon coincidence that he asked if he could take a picture of us. we ended up buying a bracelet with my mom and dad’s moons on it and a necklace with my moon and my best friend’s moon on it. it was a really special necklace to me because considering my star sign, im a cancer and i love the moon. so much. and all the magic that comes with it.

but so, later later later, i went on a trip to vegas with my parents, wearing the moon necklace religiously. we had to stay at 3 different hotels that were near each other because each night we had booked, the hotels themselves changed the prices from day to day. so i take a shower in one of the hotels and go to sleep. i had left my moon necklace in the shower. the next morning, we were running late with check out and i was groggy as all fudge. my parents rushed us out of the hotel so that we can go to the next one and it isnt until we’re already 3/4 of the way there that i realize that i didnt have my necklace. we call the hotel and ask if they can check and they couldn’t find it (or they lied and kept the pretty necklace for themselves) but either way, i lost it in vegas.

or so i thought.

so before i get into the next part, i must tell you. i went through my bin sometimes between here and then and. lil cal wasnt in there. i had a mild panic attack, but then rationalized to myself that he was probably somewhere else in my blackhole of a room.

but

just today, when i was doing a big cleaning of my room, i found a suitcase. when i opened it up, it looked like it was from that con that i went to in 2014. lol that was the con that i legit pulled an all nighter in order to finish the yukata for my yakuza!dirk cosplay. i rummage through it and find... lil cal. lil cal. was in the friggin suitcase. i hadn’t touched this shiz. in years. and he was somehow. inside of the suitcase.

crazier thing.

my moon necklace was also inside the suitcase. i just. it was so weird. AND I ALSO FOUND A $2 BILL IN LIL CAL’S BACKPACK-POCKET AND I WAS LIKE “DUDE, ARE YOU AN OMEN OR A BLESSING? WHAT IS THIS????”

but yeah. that’s my experience with lil cal. maybe i’ll keep yall in touch about his status if he does anything weird like that again.

but my explanation is that lil cal disappeared in order to find my necklace and didn’t come back until he found it.

i still don’t know why he was in the suitcase, but i’m so glad i found both him and the moon necklace. TuT

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haha i did a thing XD should i make it my avatar? sooooooo explanation about the background flag. i couldnt find anything thats specifically homosexual love between men. like, yeah, theres the rainbow flag, but thats an all inclusive flag at this point and everything else has specific flags. and so i based that flag off of the lipstick lesbian flag and did the "masc" colors instead of the "femme" colors. my best friend said it best: "boy love is ocean love. girl love is fire love." i also just really like the aesthetic of the colors XD but so heres what ive got so far on myself: homosexual/asexual man (because i am defs attracted to other men, its just that... sometimes im not attracted to anything... its confusing. its defs not demisexual because its not about the connection i have with the person nor does it have to do with the look of the person. it just. changes?) panromantic/aromantic (like, so i say im "bromantic", i am most romantically attracted to people that i can bro it out with, regardless of their sex and/or gender. but again, sometimes, i just... cant?) transgender~ (cuz ya boi is over here born in the wrong chromosomesssssss) aaaaaaand yeah! there we go XD

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lol i made an overwatch blog and the first post is my NEWLY WRITTEN ZENJI FANFIC. SO HAVE AT IT D

MIGHT AS WELL HAVE MY FIRST POST BE MY ZENJI FANFIC HAHAHA ha. h. *cries*

Zenji: Finding Zen - Chapter 1 (btw the chapters are probs gonna be p short haha)

Zenyatta was floating a top a peach tree, getting his groove on with the Iris in complete serenity when he heard some slashes coming from the distance. He looked down the mountain with his ocular sensors to find that some rustling of leaves coming from the treetops below, revealing that the slashing object was coming towards the temple. His inner chaos bubbled up and had him thinking “Maybe we should just let this thing come and slash up every one of those judgemental bastards as well as myself for having such thoughts.” and he pushed it down with a spiritual hand. He decided he should go confront the object before it got any closer to the temple. It was a good distance away.

He floats the edge of the cliff seperating the sacred Shambali temple from unenlightened followers and proceeds to jump off the edge to land at the bottom of the cliff, getting there before the object did by hovering himself off the ground at just the right time. The creature came into sight and it was a person with a mask on, or maybe it was their face. As Zen looked at the person in question, the person took off their mask and revealed a beautiful scar-faced man. If Zen had the ability to blush, he would be completely red. It is a good thing he lacks that ability.

The man breathed in the fresh high forest air and a smile came to his face with closed eyes to enjoy the moment. “I knew this place would help.” He said in… Japanese? Oh wow, a non-american hiking his way to the top of a Shambali mountain in order to get to the temple? That’s a sight that Zenyatta’s 16 year old brain was thinking. He quirks his head in question, feigning that he does not understand the language.

The man looks to Zenyatta with- Zen jumps slightly. The man has red robotic looking eyes. How surprising. “Oh, I apologize. My name is Genji. You wouldn’t happen to be part of the Shambali, would you? I came to find my inner peace.” It is even more surprising that he speaks english!

Zenyatta laughs quietly, covering where his mouth would’ve been. “Yes, Genji. I am one of the Shambali monks in this region. Would you like for me to escort you?” He holds back all the jokes he could have made at this point, making his voice come out nice and smooth and peaceful.

The man named Genji nods with that oh so beautiful smile. “I would very much appreciate that, thank you.” OH NO, HES CUTE. Zenyatta clears his throat and goes into full “Zen” mode.

He makes a wide gesture. “Then please do follow me.” Genji follows behind as Zen leads him through the foliage, along the side of the mountain until they make it to the very large massive staircase. For an ascended omnic like himself, stairs were no problem. He was a little worried about the human. He peeks over his shoulder to see that the man is just enjoying the landscape and the smells. It makes Zen’s electrical pulses skip a beat to see a man so rugged have such a precious demeanor.

As Genji walks up the stairs and Zen floats up them, an awkward long silence begins to weave itself as a blanket over the two. It’s really getting on Zen’s nerves. The omnic monk sighs heavily before turning himself around to float backwards up the stairs. “So, what exactly brings you to this place?” If his face could change emotions, it would be smirking right now.

Genji rubs the back of his neck before taking a deep breath, that cute awkward smile on his face the entire time as he looks away. “Well, I have committed many atrocities in the past… And I wish to heal my soul, I suppose.” HIS ANSWER WAS BASICALLY THE TEACHINGS OF ZEN’S BROTHER.

Zen chuckles before turning back around so that Genji would not see him POUT. “This is a good place for you then, I suppose. To find true inner peace, one must forgo one’s previous understandings of the world in order to learn anew.” He’s basically repeating what the monks at the temple repeat over and over to the students that have come before.

Zen can’t see the cute bundle of human anymore, but he can hear him chuckle as well. “Yes, I understand. I am eager to learn.” CAN HE GET ANY CUTER THAN THIS. Zen can’t help but to fan over this new cute mysterious human man, covered in sweat and scars.

He sighs heavily to himself as he floats ahead. “If only I could teach you myself. The teachings of the Shambali are proving to be rather ineffective.” He realizes what he’s saying a little too late and shuts himself up right quick.

Genji’s interests have been piqued. “How so?”

The poor teenage omnic, his inner gears turning to try and formulate an appropriate response. When he comes up with nothing, he decides to just voice his chaotic opinion. “They are so… strict. The Shambali believe peace can be gained by teaching their students that they were once wrong and that they should change themselves in order to be better people. It is ineffecient because not everyone will submit to their… judgemental ways. I, for one, think that peace shall be reached when conflicts turn to compromise and balance is found through such compromise. The connections and bonds between others is what will create a unified universe, resulting in peace across all nations, human and omnic.” He just spealed and he has decided not to let himself be swayed.

The silence that came afterwards was unbearable, until Genji laughed boisterously so. “You!” he laughs out. “Are you telling me that you are a rebel? How interesting! An omnic rebel, who would have thought.”

Zen suddenly felt attacked. “What is so wrong about being an omnic rebel? Are you saying that omnics cannot be rebels?” The poison drips from his words as he speaks them.

Genji tilts his head to the side as Zen once did. “So… are there more like you?” Was this… racism?

Zen could not tell. He had never encountered it before. “Um. Yes. All omnics have conscious thought, you know. They may not be as rebellious as I, to talk about it with a stranger… But…” Zen wonders why he was telling Genji all of this. “I will say that I have been thinking of travelling the world in order to get my own ideals known and see if they actually work in practice… a place where both peace and chaos are in balance. You may not have one without the other, afterall.”

Genji seems to ponder on this before laughing. “If that is the case, I think I would prefer that you be my sensei than any of those tight asses.”

Zen turns to look at the human and finds the most dazzling smile. Someone that… agrees with him? He feels his inner chaos bubbling… in a good way. Maybe there is still hope for this world.