littlesadzap - Tumblr blog

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girlie you can’t give up now you don’t have the dark green couch of your dreams yet

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“oh, well you haven’t read the big three—” i’ve read the big three. i have read the big three.

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i am stuck in an eternal state of yearning in which i romanticise and fantasise about all the lovers and lives i will never experience.

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I love that after years of paranoia and anxiety I have developed only two possible answers to problems:

- overthinking everything because everything matters

- apathy because nothing matters anymore

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In less than four months we will be in 2024, I will be 23 years old but I still feel mentally like a teenager. I think we don't talk enough about the effect that 2020 and the pandemic had on some people; it changed my perception of myself and reality forever, how can I continue to live and become a socially active adult when my mind is stuck in 2020? It's frustrating to see all my peers who have worked it all out, living and moving on, and I'm still here, stuck, at the mercy of the waves that corrode me until I disappear. When I think about the last four years, it feels like it was another person who lived them, like a fever dream.the derealization that quarantine has caused in me I think will never heal.

PS. Sorry for the rant, I will probably delete later

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Nobody understands the bond between a girl and the mediocre book she read when she was 13 years old.

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In less than four months we will be in 2024, I will be 23 years old but I still feel mentally like a teenager. I think we don't talk enough about the effect that 2020 and the pandemic had on some people; it changed my perception of myself and reality forever, how can I continue to live and become a socially active adult when my mind is stuck in 2020? It's frustrating to see all my peers who have worked it all out, living and moving on, and I'm still here, stuck, at the mercy of the waves that corrode me until I disappear. When I think about the last four years, it feels like it was another person who lived them, like a fever dream.the derealization that quarantine has caused in me I think will never heal.

PS. Sorry for the rant, I will probably delete later

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“barbie is anti-men”

Greta Gerwig perfectly showed how even men suffer unter the patriarchy when at the end of the movie, ken realised that during his destruction of Barbieland and building Kendom he wasn’t happy nor did he properly grasp the concept of a patriarchal rule—it didn’t make sense to him (as he had never seen or heard about it in Babrieland), he was only influenced by seeing it happen in the real world, thinking that it would only benefit him but at the end he finally realised that even if the system might put him out on top, he still couldn’t find his own purpose because really, patriarchy is not about raising one above, it’s about the oppression of others, no one can thrive in a society like that.

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@fairyprince7 < 3

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A few days ago I went to see Barbie and shortly after the trailer for the new season of Heartstopper came out + I have a lot of free time and I'm bored so catch these pride flags I made on PicsArt

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I'm in a really bad mood and I feel like I need to share this list of things I learned as a mentally ill ex-teenager in a toxic home and with friends as "found family"

Things that I hope are obvious but are not always so obvious

-Your parents are victims and perpetrators at the same time

-Your mental disease allowed you to survive and killed you at the same time

-Your mental disease have made you what you are

-No one will ever truly understand how you feel, and that is okay

-If someone laughs and cries at the same time, it's not funny, it's a wake-up call.

-From some things you can't recover and you have to learn to live with them

-Loving someone can't heal their depression

-If someone you love refuses to seek professional help, forcing them will not help them, a person can heal if they really want to heal

-The only person who can help you is you, you must want it first.

-If a person who needs your help is bad for your mental health, walking away from this person is not selfish,you don't live for others

-If a person with mental illness shows excessive and toxic co-dependence toward you, then you are not helping them, you are sinking with them

-Feeling anger toward the person who traumatized you is human, but letting that anger consume you will not help you

-Some things cannot be forgiven and cannot be forgotten, you are not a bad person for that

-Life owes you nothing

-Manic episodes are not always just funny but can be dangerous

-You can't justify yourself for hurting people just because you were hurt but you can forgive yourself and try to do better

-People you have hurt sometimes cannot forgive you, if they hate you let them but don't allow yourself to hate you for the same reasons

-Loving a person with mental illness is difficult

-Healing is fucking painful

PS. These are just random thoughts that came from my personal experience, I'm not a psychologist, I have no professional knowledge for this, this is all just personal

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humbled

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Happy pride month to all, but especially to those who cannot celebrate it, those who cannot come out of the closet or are too afraid to do so and suffer from seeing other people raise their flag when they are unable to do so, do not feel guilty, take your time and if u don't feel comfortable or are afraid for your safety stay hidden, it's not a guilt, it's a necessity and I'm sorry for that, be strong and patient, one day u will shine too and the world will see u, I wish u the best, I wish us the best, wherever u are remember I love you 🌻

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And that goes for any age, Im tired of feeling guilty because sometimes I act like Im still a teenager, there are adults who are still processing being an adult, let them be, be nice to people

I refuse to apologize for being soft—let me fall in love with life. let me sing and speak to my house-plants, let me dance in my bedroom with headphones, let me read by my windowsill when it’s pouring outside. let me stroke my friend’s face and say something sappy. let me be unapologetically happy for the little things that make my day better. life’s too short anyway, at least let me love it every step of the way

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Uncle Rick has read the fics, and you can't convince me otherwise

The fact that all of those " 3 days in the infirmary " fics where Will falls in love with Nico are canon now makes me so emotional for no good reason

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Happy Birthday Nico !! Remember you’re not alone ☀️