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motivation the key ⊹ ࣪ ˖

to success in life 𓍯𓂃

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🎀 Overcoming Gym Anxiety 🎀

I got asked about this through my inbox by @sxfiaaa so I figured I'd make a post about it and hopefully help a lot of people with something I too used to struggle with!

🩷 Wear Comfortable Clothing

We've all seen the beautifully dressed people on Tiktok, Pinterest, etc in their matching sets and cutr gym clothes. If that is what you're comfortable wearing to the gym, do it! Wear it, and be confident in it! If you're more of a loose clothes/sweatpants/baggy shirts or hoodie type of person, do that! Wear whatever you feel comfortable (and cute) in, because the better you feel going into a workout, the more you'll be able to focus on your workout!

🩷 Know What You're Doing When You're There

This just means go in with a plan! You don't need to know how to use every single machine or do every single exercise known to mankind. Scroll tiktok or pinterest for some workout videos for inspo (please make sure the video you get inspo from shows proper form!!! Proper form is so important for being safe!!)

If you know you can go certain days of the week, make a workout split to follow that! EX 3 day split: Monday - Leg Day, Wednesday - Upper Body, Friday - Full Body

OR, if you just want to go do cardio, then plan for that! I didn't know how to use a treadmill, but I went to the gym at my university and stood on the treadmill til I figured it out!

🩷 Remember This

No one is going to look at you and judge you or think mean things about you. Everyone is at the gym for the purpose of bettering themselves and their health. If you find people giving you occasional glances, maybe it's because they don't recognize you from the gym (or they do recognize you from somewhere else), maybe their admiring your outfit/physique, maybe their avid gym goers who are watching your form and technique, or maybe their just zoned out and you happen to be in the line of sight.

When I'm at the gym, I look around between sets and take note on other people's form to see if maybe I should tweak the way I do a certain exercise, or I'm admiring another girls outfit or physique because there are a lot of beautiful women at the gym. Sometimes, I'm thinking "dang, they're lifting so heavy, how cool!" or "wow, their form is amazing, they really know what they're doing." I've never thought bad abut someone at the gym because why would I?

🩷 Don't Be Scared To Ask For Help

if there an exercise you really want to do but don't know how and videos aren't helping, ask someone around you who isn't in the middle of an exercise and looks like they may know. The guy at the gym doing upper body who has good biceps may be the right guy to ask about upper body exercises. The girl doing impeccable Bulgarian Split Squats might be the right person to ask for help with those types of movements. Just make sure they aren't in the middle of an exercise, because that can cause some unwanted issues, especially if they're mid-rep, that can turn into a safety issue.

People love to help people, especially at the gym. If you politely ask for help from someone, they may take it as a compliment that you think they look like a person who is knowledgeable on working out. I'd definitely be so flattered if someone asked me for help or advice at the gym!

🩷 Random Advice:

remember your why! no matter how anxious you are, remember why you're going! what are your goals, what do you hope to achieve, how proud will you feel after?

start small if you have to! if it's really anxiety inducing to start working out, make it your first goal to at least step into the gym. then 2nd goal, walk around the gym to get a feel for it. 3rd goal, maybe 5-10 minutes on a treadmill, and then keep building momentum each day.

be careful with the hours you go! there is such a thing as peak gym hours. It varies by place, but a lot of gyms are busy between 2pm and 6pm I've seen. I personally love going to the gym super early morning, it's a little less busy and I'm a morning person so it works out for me! If you can only go during peak hours, bring a friend or keep your headphones on and do your thing!

Bring a friend! If you're really anxious about going alone, bring a friend with similar goals! Sometimes it can be a lot nicer to learn something new with a friend then try and learn it on your own! Plus, it's like extra motivation and accountability!

Have a motivating pre workout routine. Play some music while getting ready, prep your bags, prep your playlist, get your workout itself figured out, and just keep yourself excited to go! I love blasting high-energy music that makes me feel like a baddie on my way to the gym.

I hope this was helpful!! My thoughts were everywhere but I tried to convey them as best as possible! I'm happy to answer any questions or offer more tips and advice, don't feel scared to ask! <3

til next time lovelies 🩷

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François Martin-Kavel & pink fabrics

French, 1861-1931

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Masterlist is now up to date! There's new posts linked for education, mindset and general posts.

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by postcards.from.haley

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peaceful mind, grateful heart ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡.•

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i <3 me

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healing ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

growing ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

accepting ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

learning ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

evolving ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

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your value isn't determined by what other people think about you. yoru character isn't going to be judged in the court of public opinion. regardless of how you carry yourself there will always be people who don't like you- this can be due to jealousy, projection, bias, etc. so stop wasting your time trying to please everyone.

the truth is the most important thing is your internal character- your integrity, how you treat others, etc. be authentic to what you enjoy, what you think about things. when you are kind don't do it for the sake of being liked, but for the sake of being good just to be good.

focus on being your best you mentally and physically. find good friends and stick close with them. find a greater purpose in life. in the only one whose judgement matters is that of God.

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౨ৎ tips to developing a personal style ౨ৎ

⊹ disclaimer: you do not need to limit yourself to an aesthetic ⊹

we are in an age where everything is put into boxes, or subcultures. when you join an online community, you are pressured to participate in its ways. this pocket of the internet will read the same books, watch the same movies, own the same clothes. while aesthetics are amazing places to draw inspiration from, remember that your lifestyle does not need to "match" your forms of self-expression. you do not have to earn the right to participate in trends.

⊹ find media that inspires you - whether this be movies, books, music, or influencers, finding common ground among your 'favs' is a great place to start.

⊹ figure out how your clothing choices have stayed consistent - do you like formal wear? do you prefer to dress modestly? do you enjoy expressing your interests through your outfits? asking yourself these questions can narrow down your search for new statement pieces that you're guaranteed to wear.

⊹ research your colour palette - you don't have to go to a professional to see if you are a "dusty autumn" or "lively spring". your colour palette could be made up of shades you feel comfortable in or enjoy wearing.

౨ৎ remember ౨ৎ

⊹ invest in timeless pieces - by buying "basic" items from trusted brands, you'll be saving your future self time and money, as well as helping to reduce the amount of fast fashion sent to landfil.

⊹ purchase from second hand stores - buying second hand ensures the most is made out of every item. most thrift shops are also fairly cheaper than chain stores, and offer unique, brand new, vintage, or home made pieces (you just have to look!).

⊹ dispose of old clothes responsibly - there's nothing wrong with wanting to clean your closet, but there's a correct way of doing it. rather than chucking old clothes in the bin, try handing them over to someone you know, or resell at garage sales, vintage markets, or online platforms. you can donate clothes to charity and thrift stores, too. if the clothes are too worn to give away, try finding another purpose for them (there are heaps of tutorials online for upcycling old clothes). only then, if you can't do any of the above, should you put them in the bin.

love you and thanks for reading,

౨ৎ sadie, xx

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REBRANDING YOURSELF

COLLAB WITH THE HOTTIE????!!!!!!! @honeytonedhottie. LMAO NOT US PLANNING THIS IN LIKE DEC THEN RELEASING IN APRIL. I luv you so much ur my fav moot. moots who collab together, stay together. Check out her post on her page too, as usual, she makes the best points so y'all better listen.

Rebranding is a process in which you redefine who you are and how others perceive you. Each journey of rebranding yourself is personal and individual. When you rebrand yourself, you further align yourself with your higher you. This post is a guide to getting started on your journey!

UNDERSTAND YOUR CURRENT SELF.

So, take a step back and think about who you are as an individual right now. What are your values and beliefs? Does your external self reflect your inner self? Are you comfortable in your current environment?

These questions and more will help to see which aspects of your life you may need to redefine. See if there’s anything that doesn’t align with your higher self. 

After that, pick those aspects that need to be redefined. Why do you want to change this? How has this been impacting you internally/externally? Does this aspect stem from your environment or yourself? See why this aspect needs to be improved. 

DESIGNING YOUR BRAND

This is more of a fun step! So, using your aspects design how you want that specific thing to look and feel like. Avoid being vague or non-specific. Try to put in as much detail as you can for each aspect. 

If you’d prefer, you don’t have to use ‘aspects’ and instead use your life generally. This is your redesign, so do whatever is more comfortable and achievable for you.

ASPECTS

Health

Social life

Career

Hobbies

Family

Finance

Spirituality

Personal development (mindset, goals, improvement)

Self care

Culture

Well-being

Things to include

Achievable goals

How your environment looks like

How your daily life like

How you see yourself

What do you feel after

Why this is alignment within yourself? 

You can do this any way you want. The one I would recommend for redesigning your life would be a vision board, preferably a physical one. If you don’t want to do that, there are still a lot of options such as writing it down into a pretty poster, creating a playlist that will reflect your brand, creating a pretty list, or having sticky notes around your room as reminders. 

Be creative and detailed with this. You should spend at least an hour if not more trying to redesign your life/aspects.

CREATING GOALS

Goals are so important, especially when we are moving in a different direction than we were before. As we’ve got the current status of who we are and what we want to be, creating goals should be easy. 

Make your goals visible. Put a sticky note on your mirrors, put it as your laptop background, put a reminder on your phone, listen to a playlist that motivates you of your goals or anything else that will constantly remind you of your goals. 

Other than that, remember that goals have to be achievable, mindful, and flexible.

ESTABLISHING HABITS

Habits are so important to rebrand yourself. Habits make up your identity. The way you act, speak, and do daily, can subconsciously influence you to be someone who isn’t in alignment with your higher self.

 As much as it’s important to establish new habits that align with you, you have to root out the habits that are pushing you off track from achieving your goals. 

The good thing is that you can do both at the same time. Replace those old habits, with brand new ones. For example, when you open your phone first thing in the morning instead of opening up TikTok, get YouTube opened and start a 5-minute meditation to start your day.

However, just because a habit is beneficial for you, it doesn’t mean it is in alignment for you. For many people, they prefer to read books as a productive alternative for leisure, however, you may not be able to read a book and focus. In that case, you may want to watch an educational video instead. You’re still getting the benefits, but just in a different way. 

STEP FIVE: IMPLEMENTING YOUR BRAND DAILY

Think about all the little details of how this person would act, from morning until night. Embody their actions, words, aura, and vibes. This is when having a visual of your goals is good, so you can see what you need to do.

This includes no longer indulging in things your higher self wouldn’t do. Regardless of how much comfort, entertainment, or dopamine something gives you, you have to let it go if it is destroying your mind. 

I way I recommend implementing your brand daily by creating a daily routine that focuses on a different goal each day of the week. E.g:

Monday - Practicing being mindful (meditation, journaling, connecting with your religion)

Tuesday - Fitness (pilates, weightlifting, hot girl walks)

Wednesday - Socialising (going out to meet new people/connecting with old friends)

Thursday - Productivity (Schoolwork, studying, business, workplace tasks)

Friday - Self-care (taking a slow day however you’d like)

ta-daa!! thanks 4 reading. now go follow @honeytonedhottie 💕😍

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there is something so sinister and fucked up about PE class

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From now on, whenever I catch myself thinking about a man, I’ll replace these thoughts with positive thoughts about me !

I’ll get over this phase over centering my life around men. They’re not worth it.

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Improving as a person and a woman is work from the inside out, an important part is being a better friend - so how can I be a better friend?

This is a basic guide on how to be a better friend. The most important part of being a better friend is to communicate properly. Not all friendships are the same and will ask for the same things. Talk to your friends and figure out how you can be a better friend for them. Although, don’t drastically change yourself. 

BE CONSISTENT. Check up on your friends, ask them if they’re free, hype them up on their posts, and be consistent with it. You’re not friends with someone if you only talk to them twice a year, plus it makes people feel good when they think that you’ve been keeping them in their thoughts. 

AVOID JUDGEMENT. A big factor in a friendship, but it tends to be neglected in the moment. It is completely okay to question someone’s actions and give feedback sometimes, however, you have to know when judgment is not wanted or needed. Typically, avoid judging someone at all, consider their perspective. 

HONESTY. Be honest with your friends. If you do something that impacts them, tell them. If you happen to talk about them without their presence, tell them. Many people are much more forgiving if the person owns up to it. A friendship founded on lies, will not last. 

USE YOUR SKILLS TO HELP. If you excel in a certain area, ensure that you help those who struggle in that area. An example, teaching your friend how to code, or giving them advice starting in the gym. Moments of when someone willingly and happily helps you, are not easily forgotten. 

MEAN > GOOD. The heading is a bit odd, but to continue off my last point, it is much more easier to remember a small mean act, than a small good act. Likely, no one is going to remember if you held the door for them however, they will remember if you ever talked behind their back. So, think about your actions, and their effect on how people will perceive you. 

PRAISE YOUR FRIENDS. Start finding the joy in your friend’s successes. That same good energy from those successes will find you. If you curse or envy them, you will be bound to failure as you cannot share that energy. The small things like a compliment or a cute note on their locker increase that energy.

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girlie books/classics to read? ♡

Some of these books have triggering themes. Please be mindful.

Restrict by Sol Rivera. A poetry book about a toxic friendship and unhealthy eating habits. Short, but impactful.

Let's never speak of this again by Megan Williams. So sad, but loved how the ending turned out. Such a great book about the truth of girlhood and friendships.

If you could see the sun by Ann Liang. Not much about girlhood, but pretty relatable. I personally liked it.

Fugly by Claire Waller. SUCH A GOOD BOOK???? But it is so triggering. I loved the characters and their development in ther book. Its pretty much the dark side of girl hood.

Sugar coated by Sarah Epstein. A cute lil meet-cute book. I loved their romance, but once again, not much about girlhood.

You should see me in a crown. Forgot the author but such a great book about black girlhood.

The glided Ones. An unconvential book about girlhood, the plot twist was pretty sad though.

I actually read more than this, but I borrow books from the library, then forget about them.

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Hi girly 💓 how have you been baby :)

You need hug? 🫂🫂💓🥰🫂🫂💓🥰🫂💓🥰💓🫂

ily u bestie. Ive been struggling but trust things are looking up!!

i would lurve a hug 🫂

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laces and silks collection by mirror palais.