#<- no spoons to make one...

[crescentmp3]

hii, as i was redesigning celeste i made three different outfits to pick from - could anyone probide an opinion?

+ bonus me trying to pick a new hairstyle and deciding she's fine

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

[bixels]

vague-posting about this here cuz i don't feel comfortable yapping about my su takes on twitter, but after everything that's happened the most interesting thing about the su fandom to me is that so many are 100% there for applying the "everyone can change and deserves a second chance" message to everyone, even the diamonds. except for one ☝️ she doesn't count. cuz she's dead.

[inkskinned]

as we enter the start of a semester and the dreaded Hour of Making Friends us upon us... if ur ever at a loss for what to say in one of those weird social situations where you only vaguely-know people, one of my favorite questions to ask is "what is your favorite food crime." a food crime is like the food combination that you love that other people find revolting. press them to take it further than pineapple on pizza, that's rote. food crimes is a good topic that has many benefits as it turns out all people are degenerates and also it will give you some cool ideas to try out later in the privacy of your own degenerate kitchen

the other good thing to ask is "okay but has anyone here ever been someplace haunted" bc it turns out if you ask most people directly they don't believe in ghosts, but many people are like "oh yeah i lived in a haunted house. ghosts aren't real tho"

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

come get yer juice (aka some 'stocks i never posted </3)

[foldingfittedsheets]

Oh my god, poverty brain makes big purchases so freakin scary. I know I need a laptop. I will have tons of downtime at work and I can't cart my three monitor gaming PC into work on slow days. So I need a laptop. I had some help picking a really good one and it's gonna do the stuff I need. But it's still such a big chunk of money. *Sweats* I have done it. But it was hard.

Luckily it sounds like my accommodation is getting reviewed for real this time and I should have more freetime at the small store and on my days off to take commissions again! I can also resume working on my comics as I've got a tablet going spare that I can take with, so all that is very exciting.

[somegrumpynerd]

Cross has trouble getting to sleep alone in his room and goes looking for a distraction, but ends up finding a solution for both of them

[andy-clutterbuck]

requested by Anonymous

[spoonmoment119]

^real things grian has said in s6

[icewindandboringhorror]

I made a few new wax seal stamps out of clay (like the ones I did for my worldbuilding stuff forever ago), this time just of random symbols that I thought might look good done in the style of painting over the raised part of the wax or etc. :0c Some of them aren't carved deep enough to really show up that well, but overall they worked okay for being clay lol

[thresholdbb]

I have a gripe about the Star Trek mugs...

Picard's teacup is a delicate, fragile little thing held by a strip of plastic and a dream. That thin glass will break if you look at it sideways. And where do they put that ridiculous tiny cup? On the Enterprise, which is always being dragged into conflict

The DS9 raktajino mugs are hefty, wide-based things that are meant to not tip over. They're called no-spill mugs. They have a foam piece on the bottom so they don't slip. They're incredibly sturdy – meant for ships and traveling! Where do they put them? At the station, which is arguably the most stable place they could be cause DS9 rarely gets knocked about.

Far as I'm concerned, Janeway's the only one doing practical space mugs correctly. Come on, a metal travel mug that's as strong as her coffee is black? Takes a beating through 70,000 light years of bridge shakes fighting off the Borg and the Hirogen and still holds a hot drink? Now that's a space mug

[fryday]

phands

[gale-force-storm]

Headcanon time!

Gale secretly loves being the little spoon. He loves cuddling in general, and he'd never request this specifically, but when you curl up behind him and wrap your arms around him he just melts

His experiences with cuddling with a partner are... minimal at best, and he's never just been held like that before. Curled up in the comforting curve of your body, holding the hand of the arm that's draped over his waist, you nuzzling into his shoulder or hair and just holding him, it's almost overwhelming

It takes him a few times to get comfortable with it. He should be the one holding you, shouldn't he? Or he should be facing you, so he can rub your back, or kiss you, or run his fingers through your hair or, or, or... But once it starts to sink in that you like doing this? That you like holding him close like this, warm and comforting and intimate and safe? It's secretly one of his favorite things

[katkalis-the-horror-fanartist]

Fun facts about Steven in your AU?

My Steven Fun Facts/Headcanons!

This guy is tough as nails. His father is also endlessly proud of him, even gloating about him every chance he gets. He's everyones ideal pilot, able to do a few tricks in the air as well. He's the kind of hero that you'd hear about on the news landing a crashing plane safely or using his charisma to calm down a passenger freaking out and threatening a safe flight.

• Many people enjoy how kind he is to let the occasional passenger into the cockpit to experience what piloting a plane is like.

• He usually keeps to himself out of work, focused on keeping a healthy schedule of taking care of himself. He also often declines close relationships, as he gets busy often and feels as if he can't be there enough for a partner.

• He knows his way around many a gun, and sometimes hunts when he has time off. Most of what he hunts is shared amongst the apartment building as well.

• His tough exterior definitely harbors a soft interior. He shows a great deal of love for his father and helps him any time he needs it. Basically a gold star son. He is also great around kids.

• If the topic of "Who would you have on your team during a zombie apocalypse" ever arose from people in the apartment, most would call Steven. Most everyone knows how helpful he would be, as he's both a good shot and can handle himself in an up-close fist fight.

• He has a slight weakness for puns. They're a good out-of-pocket way to get him to at least smirk, huff, and shake his head. Bonus points if they're plane or pilot related. Dad jokes can sometimes work too.

[starry-bi-sky]

welcome back to another game of 'starry gets Emotions about her aus that SHE Made as if she were a viewer' aka im analyzing my own characters again. today im having spontaneous feelings over Danny's facial scar in Things in Threes and his perspective of it vs everyone else

danny got his facial scar when he was five, protecting damian's cribside from a spontaneous attack by a pair of intruders. It narrowly missed blinding him and cuts down diagonally across his face. At five, it was jarring and incredibly noticeable, stretching from his hairline to his jaw. At 15 its still painfully noticeable, but scars do not grow with age, they shrink as your body grows around it. Now it only goes from the middle of his brow to below the center of his eye.

Danny's facial scar is a point of pride for him. Despite horribly traumatizing him he refused treatment to get rid of it because it was a physical reminder that it was him who got hurt and not Damian, that he was able to protect his family. Not once does he ever feel shame or disgust towards his scar, because to feel that is to feel ashamed of protecting Damian, and he is not.

To him, his scar is a trophy. A physical reminder of his capabilities and a reminder to keep honing his skills so that he can never be hurt like that again, nor allow anyone to get close enough to him or Damian to be able to hurt him like that again.

To everyone else it is a point of tragedy. To Sam and Tucker, it is just one more physical reminder of their best friend's sad, terrible background that he refuses to share with them. All they know is that it came from him protecting his brother when he was five, something that deeply horrifies them.

To Bruce and the rest of the family, it is a reminder of what Danyal has gone through. The leeching horrors of the league that resulted in a five year old boy killing two grown men and being permanently scarred as a result, and seeing that scar as something to be proud of.

There is so much to think about about Danyal's scar.