#<the selfie tag it needed some silliness

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

sjfdhksdjs i forgot i took this selfie but POV you are a bug or perhaps a wurm on the sidewalk that I am about to gently kick into the grass so u dont get trampled

[toytulini]

the jester ensemble is coming together so well

(They/It)

[yunarim]

. . . INTRODUCING | AN ULTIMATE GUIDE TO making not so easily flustered boys blush a little— or maybe not so little ?! ⊹ ׅ ⋆

CATER diamond, LEONA kingscholar, JADE leech, JAMIL viper, VIL schoenheit, ROOK hunt, LILIA vanrouge

— TAGS : gender neutral reader, fluff, crack a little, you end up embarassing yourself in a funny way almost in every chapter but it's okay (i would do the same tbh), a silly reference to matchmaking tv show in rook's part just for fun

🎀﹒CATER DIAMOND

You realize you’ve never seen Cater blushing. You also didn’t want him to try those extremely artificial filters which apply some blush effect on selfies, so there was only one option left for you — which is making him flustered.

So one sleepless night you decided to think over all the variants you could possibly try, and appeared before Cater the next day, looking not all your best, but you already was sure to give it a go, so you took a deep breath.

And decided to pull your cringiest aegyo which could be ever possible (or maybe even wasn’t) and started singing in a very high-pitched voice, embarrassing yourself but not really caring. “I like you so much ottoke ottoke” was heard along all NRC and became trendy thing later on, BUT AS FOR NOW… now you were flustered instead when Cater patted your head and just begged for you to teach him that so he won’t be falling behind the trends. After a few explanations, he already mastered the song and— NOOO, it wasn’t how you expected it to be!!

Next days went the same way: you would come up with a sudden idea, try to get Cater flustered and end up with being flustered yourself. You also noticed how Cater’s followers were cheering on you in the comments section and decided that you’ve had enough. 

You came to him right in a full swing of an unbirthday party, other students were already guessing what funny thing you would perform today, but you just took the seat right in front of Cater, an enormously long table aparting you two. An unusually serious look in your eyes made your boyfriend get concerned for a second before you slammed your palms on the table and stood up. 

“Argh!” You screamed, annoyed a little. “It isn’t fair! And I’ve had enough of this shi—” You noticed Riddle glancing your way and sighed, lowering down your gaze and pouting. “Why am I even doing this when all that matters is you being happy, which is my top priority… I’m sorry for being so stupidly eager… But if you had fun watching me doing all those silly things, then I’m more than glad to make you smile. So instead of me trying to make you blush, I’ll keep on making you smile genuinely. Got it?”

You looked right in his eyes, flashing a victory smile and dropping it instantly when you spotted him averting his gaze, a little pinkish flash flickering on his cheeks. 

“Don’t tell me…”

“Cater-senpai blushed!!”

“Hey Prefect, mission accomplished!!”

“HUH?!” You run to him. “But why so suddenly?!”

“Aww, please don’t make me explain~” He giggled, that little cute blush already disappeared. “It’s just the way you were so genuine… Please never change, alright? And now I need to get you flustered too!”

“Won’t be that hard. But don’t try to embarrass me with an aegyo song, I’ve mastered it by now.”

🎀﹒LEONA KINGSCHOLAR

Listen herbivore, whatever you’re planning, drop it. There’s no point in whatever you’re trying to achieve with those funny grimaces of yours (Leona won’t say they’re adorable tho—). You can’t also make him blush by embarrassing him because he already has a bunch of dormmates who embarrass him enough by their behavior, he doesn’t really care. 

Pfft, who does he think he is? As if you could be swayed off so easily! Well you do struggle a lot, trying to figure out is it even possible to witness Leona flustered. Some first years witnessed you going back and forth in the back of the kitchen one day and ended up agreeing you’ll be the new part of ‘Seven miracles of NRC’—or whatever it was, you didn’t even know the thing existed all this time—not to mention even Savanaclaw residents periodically glance at you as if you’re some sort of a ghost. Is there a ghostification procedure to endure before getting sorted into Ramshackle or what?

Hello, you’re dating Savanaclaw dorm head. Whatever you’re trying to prove, it’s already crazy, but not crazy enough than the very fact of you two being romantically tied together. 

“You’re dating THAT Leona Kingscholar?!”

“Yeah, he’s being a pain in the ass for not blushing at all.”

… Is what gets Leona smirking proudly lying under the tree in the botanical garden— THAT’S NOT IT. You always punch him slightly for behaving that way and enjoying you struggling.

“Give me Farena’s phone number NOW. I need consultation.”

“You don’t have a phone, herbivore.”

“I’m in the mood for kicking Crowley’s office doors down with my foot and demanding a phone.”

“Didn’t know you’ve got a hobby of embarrassing yourself.”

Hell yeah you did. There’s no turning back at this point, not after trying all those stupid faces you’ve demonstrated in Savanaclaw lounge full of other residents who got flustered by your antics instead, Leona remained unbelievably stupidly insanely solid.

Another day, another embarrassment. The evening was looming before you, Grim demanding you, his dearest henchman, to get yourself together and come back home (aka Ramshackle) and forget about trying to get Leona flustered. The idea is dumb anyway, do you really want to see HIM blushing out of all people? Damn…

“I think I might just punch you in your stupid pretty face to get a hint of blush on your cheeks. Damn I’m such a mastermind,” you complained, poking your finger on his chin while lying next to him. 

“Go try,” Leona yawned. “I doubt your success though. What can you even do with those little hands of yours?”

You sigh, closing your eyes for a second. Leona opens his on the contrary, glancing at the crown of your head.

“Doesn’t matter how strong other people’s hands are, they can’t hug the best person in the world with them. But I can.”

You turn to Leona, ready to demonstrate what you’ve just said but end up stopping in the middle, staring at his bewilderment face, a little hint of red hue blossoming on his cheeks. 

“No way…” You whisper and turn to him completely, ignoring his ‘tsk’ and throwing yourself on him. “Don’t tell me!!”

“I’m not telling.”

“You’re such a cutie!!”

“Don’t even know how come you’re so spoiled.”

🎀﹒JADE LEECH

It’s always Jade and his never ending “Fu fu, you’re so fascinating, dear Prefect” plays. One day when having dinner at the Mostro Lounge you somehow ended up flustering Azul and Floyd. And that was also the moment you knew you fuc— ahem, failed something. 

“A~ah, what for are you being so caring,” you mumbled to Jade sitting beside you and pouring the drink into your glass. “I love you so much.”

“Ehem, Prefect, that’s a little…”

“Ew,” Floyd commented. “Koebi-chan, you’re greasy.”

You blinked at them, switching your gaze to Jade who seemed to be having fun and taking all this as some sort of entertainment. You furrowed your brows, noticing Jade’s unwavering smile and tried once more.

“Should I write a serenade? We could hold a karaoke night or something, I’m quite confident in my singing.”

“Koebi-chan~ Stop being gross, what’s gotten into you? Jade, you tell!”

“I’m exceedingly flattered,” Jade ignored his twin, getting a bit closer to you. “Should I write a poem to you as well as a way of showing my gratitude?”

By now you know there’s a pattern hidden in his behavior. Whenever you try to pull ‘I’m so stupidly in love with you it’s painful so I’ll cause a mess trying to get you flastered’ card, Jade reflects it, saying things even more exaggerated and far-fetched to the point it hurts other people. 

Somehow your little antics turns into competition between you and Jade — the one who’ll get more flustered students wins. Azul is ready to place a bet but then you abruptly cut him off by saying an extremely embarrassing nonsense and he shuts up immediately, followed by Floyd’s laughter. You don’t stop, making Jade brother’s cheeks covered in pinkish hue. 

Polite Leech twin who? Jade loses his status thanks to you, mimicking into ‘A scary part of Embarrassing duo’ instead. In all this little play you perform you want to find undercovered Jade’s flustered persona. 

Jade likes fascinating, interesting things. That includes your behavior and what made him fall in love with you in the first place—you’re quite an unique individual, dear Prefect. But acting oh so mysteriously and entertaining Jade’s interest isn’t enough. He loves you for that, but what makes him flustered?

“The ground is sure slippery today,” you notice during the Mountain Lover Club activities, ascending the mountain. 

“Yes, I trust you’re rather careful, aren’t you, dear?” Jade smiles and stretches out his hand to you so you could grab it just in case.

“Of course I am! Who do you take me for—”

Hello?? Maybe climbing on the wet dirty cliff isn’t a good idea?? 

You back off, feeling the ground slipping away from under your feet, and stare at Jade, who seems just as frightened as you.

“I’m sorry!” You shout out when he catches you, drawing you closer. “Though I would fit Embarrassing duo aesthetic with a twisted ankle. I already can imagine which jokes based on it would fluster Azul and… Jade?”

“Haah,” Jade sighs. “Don’t scare me like that.”

“Scare?.. What do you mean? I’m okay!”

“What would I do if it was more than a twisted ankle and… nevermind, forgive me for raising a voice at you and… Hm?”

“Huh,” you stare at him in awe. “You’re blushing?!”

“Yes?” Jade blinks away all the blush he had just now. “It seems you’re imagining things.”

“Don’t tell me, I can get you flustered by putting myself in danger? Jade, you’re so…”

“I suggest you not repeat such an experience ever again, thank you very much,” he smiles at you intimidatingly but you giggle, leaning closer to him.

“Yep, I promise~”

🎀﹒JAMIL VIPER

“Try being nice to him!” Kalim says to you (as if you’re not being nice but ok) when Jamil taste-tests his meal right before your backs, sighing at Kalim’s silly statement. 

“That’s your prerogative, Kalim-senpai,” you say, not noticing Kalim’s slight crimson hue on the cheeks. 

You’re being so effortlessly sweet to everyone—your boyfriend included—but hello? Is Jamil actually protected from being able to blush or what? 

You’ve tried so many things it’s almost painful to witness. Saying something nice? Ok he’s in Scarabia, literally go try something else, do you really expect him to fall into your sugary sweet words or what. Helping him out in the kitchen with chores? Yeah you did a good job now go rest. Praising him out of blue for his only existence? Erghh who are you trying to fool, really… 

It’s not like Jamil doesn’t appreciate your attention aimed at him, but what are you really trying to do? Isn’t it fairly enough to enjoy the time you two get to spend together so rarely? But in any case your shenanigans end up being an everyday held discussion with bet placings. It’s not average ‘will you manage to get your boyfriend flustered’—not that, but ‘will you try doing some funny shit so that Jamil would get not flustered but embarrassed instead or will you just show PDA’. Now that’s the real entertainment.

Ok so you come up with a plan. Good old kabedon would be so real, right? Even if he won’t fall into your charm, then at least will blush because of embarrassment… Ugh.

And so you think, walking out into the school hall, seeing Jamil from the distance, ‘Almost pa~radise’ playing from somewhere (what kind of romcom is that—) cornering him and trying to look as cool as possible, your gaze aimed right at his steel dark eyes, eyelashes fluttering enchantingly, ‘Shalalala~’ sounds all over the place when you try to grin proudly. Jamil parts his lips slightly and—

“I’ll let others know that their bet failed miserably,” he sighs, meeting your bemused eyes. “They thought you would dance for me today while singing a serenade.”

You pout, averting your gaze and quickly trying to come up with something while you still—kinda—corner him. 

“I didn’t expect the music though,”  Jamil notices. “Maybe one day something will catch me off gua— MHM?!”

Ah hell with it, you think, grabbing the cloth of his dorm uniform and pulling him closer and pressing your lips to his, it’s now or never! Go get that blush while you’re still at it, right?

“What are—”

You never give him time to think, catching his lips again and again. You open your eyes, looking straight at his cheeks but notice no blush. Alright, then it’s time to give it all the 100% of your devotion!

“You!” You exclaim, kissing him once again. “I love you,” you continue with another brief kiss. “An amazing dancer, an unbelievably talented cook, a wise strategist, an amazing singer, you’re… you…! You jerk!”

“Ha?!”

You can’t really define by now if he’s blushing or not, because it’s you who is flustered instead. But oh be sure he is blushing hard.

“Hey, the last thing you’ve said,” he stops you, trying to catch his breath. “You fool, what are you saying?”

But before you manage to retort, he kisses you back, not caring at your crazy antics anymore, the tips of his ears flaming with crimson.

🎀﹒VIL SCHOENHEIT

Well… first congrats on managing to get the boyfriend who got ranked number one at the top of ‘The most unflustered celebrities ever’. But you wouldn’t be you if you didn’t like a real challenge.

Flattery will get you nowhere and you know it by heart. Genuinely praising his work ethic? You should know it’s the axioma, not the compliment which could lead you to witness him blushing. You decide to play a strategist and wait for the right moment to come.

“Yeah yeah, just admit you have no fuc— eeehm freaking idea of what to do rn,” Epel says, stealing your juice when you two discuss your masterplan. 

“Dude I have a plan, believe me.”

“Uh-huh, that’s a great plan, Prefect. That’s fuckin’ ingenious, if I understand it correctly. It’s a Swiss fuckin’ watch.”

“What did I say about wording?” Vil appears right behind Epel’s back, and your classmate gets red instead of your boyfriend instantly. 

You: wanting to make Vil blush because you’re curious and also he would look fantastic, cute, gorgeous, angelic, divine and—

Epel: helps you for lulz.

And then the opportunity arrives: there’s an upcoming Filming Research Club project you intend to join. You manage to get the role and DAMN how lucky you are — the main task is to make Vil’s character flustered!

That’s where the real challenge starts because you know that Vil’s a genius actor and one little blush needed for the play is nothing but what you don’t know is how to make him blush for real.

“You came,” he says according to the script. “You in my arms is like a fever dream to me.”

You gently touch his cheek.

“Ah,” Vil fixes a lock of your hair, and you allow it, staring into his eyes radiating nothing but a feigned tender. “Your Grace, I believe I have no authority to meet you like this. Scarcely thought I would present such a pathetic side of me to you…”

“You have so much power,” he denies. “You will never be pathetic. To me or to anyone else.”

It’s just a rehearsal but it’s the right time for you to not act and perform wonder for real.

“And you, my dear,” you deviate from the script, Vil remains steady at your improvisation, until… “I love you with all your flaws and all the things you disrelish in yourself.”

You see Vil’s cheeks growing a bit reddish when his eyes widen a little at your sudden genuine words and a lovely smile. He can’t afford losing composure so easily, so the next second he already pulls you closer boldly. 

“I loathe to realize I’m the only one whose cheeks are painted crimson. Would you allow me to fix it?”

“Of course.”

— And cut. 

And while others are in bewilderment at your improvisation which turned extremely good, Epel freaks out in the background.

“Stop being greasy already,” he says, covering his mouth in disgust. “It’s just as gross as stumbling across parents when they kiss, bleh.”

“Didn’t know you see me as your parental figure,” Vil nods.

“NEVER!”

🎀﹒ROOK HUNT

“Have you ever seen Rook blushing?”

“What are you saying?” Vil replies. 

“Sounds impossible,” Epel agrees. “Keep on trying tho.”

Keep on trying to get your boyfriend, the Rook Hunt, to get flustered? HUH, NEVER IN YOUR LIFE, nuh-uh, what are you, insane? You brush off the mere thought of trying to get him to blush at the very first second it even appears in your mind.

You’re not crazy, why would you try that?! It’s impossible!

But somehow your question you accidentally dropped during the meal you were having with Vil and Epel gets popular in the NRC newspaper. You don’t care if there wasn’t a newspaper before — it was created just for ‘Have you ever seen Rook blushing?’ caption to spread throughout the college.

Sure many students just frown at it because why would they even be interested in this, who in their right mind would approach Rook willingly in the first place— ah right you would, you did, you love him. 

Then it’s time for you to take responsibility and solve the mystery! 

Uh-huh, if it was that easy to accomplish! Your first guess is to impress him with French but you literally can say some nonsense because of mispronouncing words and he would be in awe, heart-shaped sparkles in his eyes all over the place. 

You are willing to take archery classes? Fantastique, étonnant! He will gladly help you with that, do you know it’s important to have enough strength in your arms? Here, he will show you the right position and— wait, it's you who blush.

You write a love poem to him in French? Ah, à vous couper le souffle! Just how talented you are, your love knows no bounds, he’s exceedingly lucky to have you as his lover!

Cool ok so… What to do?! 

“This whole ‘get Rook flustered’ thing drives me insane,” you say to Epel with a heavy sigh, holding a flower bouquet you’ve prepared.

“You’ve brought this all yourself,” he replies. “Idk do something ergh… Genuine? I feel like a matchmaker.”

“We’re already dating tho.”

“I don’t care, go get that blush already.”

Alright, it’s time to solve all this mysterious ‘Have you ever seen Rook blushing?’ thing already. You find Rook in the school yard and decide to play it another way. You’ve already tried being romantic, why don’t try something stupid at least once, right?

You get down on one knee and give Rook the bouquet you’ve prepared.

“Ahem… It’s Larisochka Guzeeva and this is the program ‘Let’s get married!’... Or not. Actually, I’m not trying to suggest that we get married. Not yet! Maybe in the near future… God what am I saying argh!! ANYWAY! Rook, listen, I love you to the point I don’t care if I act odd and weird to other people. I’m okay with doing all these when I’m with you…”

“He… Heheh~ Oh dear Trickster, what a lovely person you are,” Rook chuckles at your performance and you think you’ve failed miserably but then you notice how sweet the pinkish hue on the tips of his ears is and raise up instantly.

“I did it!!”

“Ah, right, I think I should do it more often.”

“What.”

“Spreading the mystery about no one seeing me blush, of course~”

“ROOK!”

─ ⊹ It’s Larisochka Guzeeva and this is the program ‘Let’s get married!’ — a popular russian TV talk show and the saying, it doesn't really mean anything, it's just for lulz ahsdjkh

🎀﹒LILIA VANROUGE

Ok so how do you make an aeon old bat fae flustered.

Lilia knows you want to impress him before you even know it yourself, and when the whole Diasomnia holds a parley about how to prevent you from getting a majestic glorious undoubtedly wise and stoic Lilia-sama— ok Sebek we got you, in any case Lilia just chuckles and smirks.

It’s a game! And if it is, then you should laugh, not blush, the formula is easy. He will make you flustered instead before you even can think of something. 

A petard exploding with sparkling particles early in the morning with ‘Greeting to the most important person in all the dimensions existing’ forming right under the ceiling of your room in Ramshackle? Easy, wanna see it again tomorrow? 

If the petard was too scary for you to comprehend or wasn’t so romantic, then how about fixing the collar of your uniform before pressing a gentle kiss on your cheek?

Still not convinced Lilia’s a master of making you flustered? Ho~ You silly, how about the ring changing its engravings every hour, going from ‘I love you’ to ‘I’m forever yours’? 

Look, dear Prefect, he's absolutely invincible! You’ve got such a brainy boyfriend and—

Ho, have you finally realized you want to see him flustered? Bring it on!

… Or so he thought.

Suddenly you don’t react at all. He bought flowers? Ok cool you have an enormously large garden in Ramshackle by now, what’s the big deal? He composed a song for you? Yeah nice why not. 

Lilia quickly realizes you’re playing another game. Why not, you’re being so amusing while trying to outsmart him by pulling the ‘I actually don’t care at all’ card, but he knows how your little smiles blossom when you turn around, so there’s no need to worry.

“Stop being so unnecessarily cold to Lilia-sama!!” Sebek demands when you visit Diasomnia and blink at him.

“Calm down, Sebek. Prefect and Father play a game. A strange one, there’s no denying, but still…”

The two of them start bickering and you chuckle, trying to reassure them everything’s okay. 

Lilia joins you not that instantly, watching you for some time and then decides to have some fun again, hugging you from behind and floating midair at the same time.

“Ho~ I see you’re not repulsing me today, hm?” 

“I was in the middle of creating another tactic but got distracted by the kids.”

“Kids?” Lilia leans closer to you with a cheeky grin on his face.

“Yes, Silver and Sebek are like kids to me. Is it what having children feels like? Maybe we could start our own family one day… Oh, I got carried away. What are you going to demonstrate to me to… day…?”

You turn to Lilia, his face extremely close to yours when you see a foreign pink dusting his cheeks while his eyes widen in shock.

You are willing to start a family with him?.. That…

“HUH?! DID I SUCCEED? I literally did nothing!!”

“Hu-hu~” Lilia recovers quickly and presses a little kiss on your cheek. “Who knows~”

© yunarim 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝. 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭, 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲, 𝐦𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐲, 𝐨𝐫 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐚𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐨𝐰𝐧.

[deathblacksmoke]

call me when you get the chance

pairing: noah sebastian x nick ruffilo x fem reader

cw: polyamorous relationship, long distance yearning, it’s pretty fluffy my friends

taglist: @concretenoah / @ladyveronikawrites / @lma1986 / @monotoniscreaming / @xxrainstorm / @agravemisstake

let me know if you’d like to be tagged in future fics!

author’s note: thank you lady v once again for the beta; i added some pitt back in just for you. and thank you @darksigns-exe for the poly boyfriends brainworms. no smut in here - wild change of pace. and i’ll probably be writing more little bits of these sweet babes at some point 🤍 i got euclid on the brain so title from that, obvi. enjoy!

**************************************************************

Nick sends a postcard from every city.

Missing you from Atlanta! Love, Nicholas.

It makes you feel warm and loved, every time you open your mailbox to another card from another city, with your partner’s pretty writing on the back.

You imagine him standing in the store for ages, sifting through the cards, trying to pick the perfect one for your gallery wall. You imagine Noah picking one out as a joke, and Nick scoffing, putting it back irritated.

No, man, she’s particular about her wall. Remember?

It makes your chest swell. You long to be there, to play mediator like you do when they’re both home with you. They need it sometimes, and you’re sure Jolly could use the break every now and again.

Noah sends memes. They’re ones you would never see otherwise because you won’t step foot on Twitter, but they make you smile and remind you of him, his stupid sense of humor, and the way his face lights up when he laughs. You close your eyes and imagine it, his eyes scrunching closed with his laugh, and your chest tightens.

They always send a selfie when they get off stage, and another before bed, sometimes a FaceTime if you’re still up. They don’t show you their intertwined hands. They know it makes you jealous and weepy, but you’re so grateful that they have each other. You imagine them kissing when the call ends and you cry anyway.

***

When you couldn’t make it to the show you had all planned for, you thought that was it. Work gets in the way again, sends you out of town, but you’ll see them when they come home to you and all will be okay.

The show looks incredible. You brave social media just this once to see clips of your boys, weep in bed in your hotel room. You stay up late to see them before you sleep—they tell you they wish you were there, they miss you, they love you. You catch a glimpse of a love bite on Nick’s chest and wish it could have come from you. You fantasize about quitting your job. You get closer every day.

The postcard comes two days later, a pop-art rendition of the Pittsburgh skyline, Nick’s little note scrawled across the back. It feels silly to have but you knew he wouldn’t dare to break the tradition he’s created.

Wish you were here! Love always, your Nicholas.

You don’t know how much longer you can go without them, holding back tears as you put the card in its frame, giving it its place on the wall.

You feel helpless and hopeless until you get an email, the airline notifications you had set up on cost changes doing you a solid, for once. Flight to LAX, suspiciously affordable, landing at 2 PM on the 8th of October.

It’s not a question. You don’t think twice. You have the PTO, and your boss can’t possibly deny you again. And if they do, fuck it, you’ll really dig your heels in about them needing another girl working on the tour. You’ll get Lana on your side this time around. They can’t say no to you both.

You book the ticket, arrange a guest list spot with Matt and buzz with excitement in preparation for your surprise.

***

You never tire of watching them perform.

The way Noah owns the stage, running from stage left to stage right, commanding the crowd to chant and jump with him. Nicholas, his long hair swaying with each rock of his neck to the beat of the song. His slender fingers grip the neck of his bass as he bounces his leg, growling backing vocals going straight through you. You wish you could be at every show. You swell with pride and know you couldn’t have picked two better boys to share your life.

You head to the green room when they come back out to say their thank yous and goodbyes. You hate to miss the photo slides but you helped pick most of the photos, anyway. Lots from your private collection and you think maybe you owe some of these people a “you’re welcome.”

Sitting on the old, worn leather couch, you start to panic. You’ve never surprised them before. Noah hates surprises, but you hope at least you’re a good one.

Folio comes through the door first, followed by Jolly, and the door swings back closed. Shocked at first when they see you, Folio’s face breaks out into a huge grin before turning on his heels.

“Yo, Noah, you’re gonna wanna see this—” he yells as he swings the door back open, to reveal Nick, sweaty and looking exhausted, but when his eyes land on you—

“Holy shit,” he whispers.

You can barely make it out above the roar of noise in the hallway. You don’t know where Noah is, but Nick looks as gorgeous as you’ve ever seen him. You need to take a deep breath but find your throat stopping you as your vision starts to blur. The look on his face as he crosses the room to you melts your anxiety in an instant. You haven’t seen him in so long. And he’s here. He’s right here with you.

When he reaches you, he sinks to his knees at your feet. His fingers digging into your thigh, eyes glazed over as he looks up at you, you lean down to meet him halfway.

The feeling of his lips on yours makes you feel dizzy. The feel of the wetness on his cheeks when you cup his face makes you want to sob, but you don’t, you lick into his mouth and bask in the sound of his gasp.

“Where the fuck were you,” he speaks into your mouth when he pulls away from you.

His fingers are gripping your thigh painfully. You know you’ll bruise, you wince, but it’s Nick and you don’t care. You’ll press your fingers there when you get home and you’ll think of him and—

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I was flirting with the pretty bartender. I think you’d like her, Nicky, do you think Noah will go for a fourth?”

He’s leaning in for another kiss when you hear the green room door slam back open, thundering steps getting closer and closer until Nick is jostled forward, Noah’s head resting on his shoulder, eyes focused on you.

“You were a very naughty girl, keeping this secret from us,” Noah says, his head angling to press kisses and nip at Nick’s neck. Nick grins and you watch as the hand that was digging into your thigh takes Noah’s hand and laces their fingers.

When you’re far away, it makes you jealous. When you’re right here, when you have them both in front of you, that’s the furthest thing from your mind.

When you kiss Noah and he smiles into it, when the hand not laced with Nick’s threads through your hair, when Nick nips at your neck while Noah kisses you, you’ve never felt more at home.

Because they are your home.

“Nicky let me pick your postcard this time,” Noah tells you when he pulls away.

“You’ll hate it,” Nick says, but he’s grinning as he stands up to rummage through his backpack.

When he returns to you and holds it out, it’s a silly little card, but both their names are signed this time.

Loving you from LA. Love, your Nicholas and Noah.

Noah’s grinning as wide as you’ve ever seen. It’s your favorite of the bunch.

[flappingdragon]

Hi!

Could I request the brothers + side characters reaction when mc turns into a goose? I was thinking something like mc turned into a goose due to Solomon messing up again, and they act like the goose from Untitled Goose Game, but cuddlier. Like they are still a little menace, but also want to be pet and cuddled.

If you don’t want to do this request I completely understand as it is a bit odd. I hope you have a great day/night!

A/N: Sorry that I’m so late!! I was just caught up in a lot of things and forgot this was in my drafts oof. I also changed a few things up just to be a little silly (and also bc I didn’t want to write the personality of duck MC here). Anyway, I decided to divide this into two parts; one for the brothers and the other for the side characters. Enjoy!

The Brother’s Reactions to Duck!MC

Characters: Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub, Belphegor

Rating: SFW, fluff

Warnings: GN!MC, no pronouns used for MC, no gender specified for MC, interactions based on the brothers (not MC), personality not specified for MC

Tags: Fluff, the brothers love duck!MC, cuddling, preening, etc.

Part I (This Is Where You Currently Are), Part II (Coming Soon!)

Lucifer

How the hell did this happen?

“Will you stop taking my things, please? You’re making my life even more difficult than it is already.”

At first, he’d have fun with it, teasing you by picking you up randomly when in private

Even going so far as to sit in his lap while he pets you

But then he’d look for a way to fix it

And eventually he does, much to everyone’s protests

He’ll miss the times when he sets you in his lap and feeds you your favourites, but if you can be more helpful to him in your human form, he’d prefer that

Besides

He’d like to see your face instead of that of a duck

Mammon

Oh lord

Is he ever about to get in trouble

He’s no doubt teaming up with you to steal money

I mean

A duck?

In the Devildom?

Now THAT is about to attract a lot of money

He’d probably set up an attraction where lots of demons and demon-kin alike get to meet and pet a real goose

I feel like at the end of it all, even if Mammon did get a lot of money, you’d be exhausted

Because you already know you were out there for hours getting pet by so many

You need to recharge a bit

And that includes a lot of pets from Mammon

And a lot of cuddles

You know he’s going to be so happy to oblige

Levi

Unlike Mammon, he’s not going outside of the house

So you don’t have to worry about that

He’ll set you in his lap while he’s playing video games and he’ll let you time to time between bosses

Hell, he’ll even give you a controller to play with him if he’s feeling extra bored

And it baffles him how you win every time

Because a duck? Beating him? That’s impossible!

But he loves it

He’d lose to you again and again if it meant holding you in his lap like this

Satan

Team Prank Lucifer: Duck Addition

No but seriously, he’s getting into mischievous trouble with you in tow

He’d probably start by making cursed illusions of you but they all have different personalities

For instance, one could be kind and gentle while another could blow up the house

But while your illusions are causing havoc, the real you is resting in his lap as he reads a good book

He’s running his fingers through your goose feathers, practically preening you

He finds it relaxing how he can just pet you and sit back

If he’s honest, he hasn’t been reading his book for the past half an hour

He’s too busy adoring the way you shake your feathers in response to his pets

He finds you irresistibly adorable

Asmodeus

You already know he’s going to put you in cute little outfits

Doesn’t matter how much you hiss at him, he’ll find a way to put some sort of sweater on you

Once he does, he squeals and gets out his phone, taking a selfie with your very-not-amused-goose-face

This is not the first outfit he’s putting you in though, he’s putting you in sparkling pink and blue dresses and cute little tuxedos

He’s also putting some big, fluff coats on you

You’re not getting out of his sight no matter how hard you try

You just have to hope he gets bored

But let’s be honest here

That’s not happening

Beelzebub

Beel is pretty chill when he sees you all snuggled up beside his pillow, minding your own business

At first, he didn’t know it was you so he just kinda left you alone, thinking that you were another one of his brother’s crazy pets

Only when you had followed him out to the kitchen did he start to catch on

And once he does know it’s you, he’s carrying you everywhere with him

To the kitchen, the common room, the gym, RAD, or even the Demon Lord’s Castle

It doesn’t matter

As long as you’re in his arms, he’s happy

And if you want, he’d give you a few snacks as well

He doesn’t mind

And honestly? He’d get a bit sad when you return to normal

He got used to carrying you around :(

Belphegor

You can get he’s not moving unless he has to

So you’re his napping buddy until he’s forced to get up

He’d hold you in his arms and cuddling you as he sleep talks

Sometimes, if you’re lucky, you can escape his grasp and sit on either his back or his stomach

When he wakes up, he’s so confused bc his sleepy brain is thinking-

“Why is there a duck on me?”

And then he remembers that it’s you and he bundles you up in his arms again

He looks away when your duck wings flap in his face but he starts petting you when you settle

He’ll stay awake to pet you despite the pull of his sin that makes his eyes flutter closed every now and then

But he enjoys it

And when you return to normal, he’s in your arms fast asleep

[icallhimjoey]

so apparently there are some rumers, that joe is dating a girl called kate and that they revealed their realiationship at bfi. I mean I dont care who he is dating, as long he is happy, so am I. But where do those rumers come from?? There is literly no information, just those people saying that they are dating and sending hate mails to kate…

okay, FINE, im going to get into this, tell you all i know, and then that can be it for the questions i keep getting about this, because it really is neverending (and insanely annoying to me) so, lets go

kate is a writer/director who works with/for 'film hub north/bfi network/rianne pictures' as stated in her instagram bio, lives up north near newcastle and is gorgeous

at the london film festival this year she has gone to see hoard

she posted a pic to her insta stories of the Q&A after hoard from her seat in the cinema (like so many other fans did too) and said some nice words about luna and she tagged some people

one of the producers reposted the story into their stories which i think is how people "found" her

kate had a pic taken on one of the bfi red carpets (by herself) AND had a pic taken in a large group, one of who was lorn (lauren quinn - no relation - this is not about her, but people draw conclusions about this too)

NOW

just a couple weeks before, joe made a playlist on his spotify account called "Kate's" with two songs in

so, some girls went 1 + 1 = this is a relationship

kate has red hair and is literally stunning, so they're saying "she's his type, must be true"

kate got messages/insta comments asking about it, she posted a story to her insta that said something along the lines of "this is silly please stop this is my professional account i should be able to post what i want without being harassed i have body dysmorphia pls leave me alone"

went private and then public again shortly after

when i say that there's been 0 actual proof that these two people even know each other, i truly mean that there's 0 proof that these two people know each other at all

if we're just looking at the facts: she's a fan

the end

every time people have been trying to link them up, joe's been pictured/filmed to be by himself

couple weeks ago, kate posted stories to her instagram of her being in malta and, presumably, people started asking questions, because she very quickly went private and deleted the insta stories

she went public again shortly after, and the day that joe was pictured doing a lil food shop in his local tesco's, kate posted a mirror selfie in a lift and behind her, there's an arm in the frame - now, imo, not even close enough to touch her bum, but people went BLACK COAT, THAT'S JOE AND HE'S TOUCHING HER ASS

big sigh

so

what kate is NOT doing is coming out and denying anything, which is a choice

she doesnt have to do shit, she doesnt owe anyone anything, but to hit the snooze button and ignore everything is definitely a choice

in turn, some girls are taking the no-denying as proof of it being real and have made twitter and tiktok accounts and KEEP FUCKING SENDING ME QUESTIONS THAT KEEP PUSHING THIS TO BE THE TRUTH (they are not nice about it either)

i have yet to see any truth to any of these rumours - to me it feels like a lot of stories being pulled from thin air that some girls find extremely entertaining

i do not

i have no interest in this

don't get me wrong - joe'd be lucky to date someone as pretty as kate, she seems lovely, but i am going to need some actual proof before i just go with whatever some people are trying to sell to me as the truth

please do not reach out to me on anon about this

if you have anything you want to discuss with me, please find me in the tumblr chat messages

thanks <3

[moderndaypandora]

Got tagged by @notallsandmen for a WIP paragraph game, and I’m incredibly flattered, considering ... this doesn’t feel on the level of fic, this is fun little sketches of dialogue at most. But this is what I had, so here’s more of the mortal dreamling silliness (previous bits: modern day mortal dreamling and newlyweds with ravens)

How Hob asked Johanna to be his witness for his wedding:

He texted her asking if she was free that afternoon, because he needed her for something.  Historically "something" has meant anything from "taste-testing 3 different scone recipe variations to figure out the best one" to "hustling drunk pricks at darts". Likewise, Hob has done her favors ranging from picking up tampons to providing an alibi. In theory there is a ledger of favors owed, but in reality there will never be a balancing of books (because they're best friends, even if Johanna is too prickly to admit it and Hob is too smart to).

Johanna texted back "yeah, what's up?", and practically broke a land speed record pressing "Call" when she got the response.

Johanna: what the fuck kind of text exchange is confirming I'm around and then sending "getting married today, hello, witness!" and a selfie of you and some goth twink?

Hob: it felt pretty self-explanatory

Johanna: last I'd checked, you weren't even seeing anybody!

Hob: things change?

Johanna: I got dinner with you 5 weeks ago, you bastard, and you were single then.

Hob: ... things change fast?

Johanna: how the fuck did you even meet him?

Hob: I was running back from class during that awful rainstorm last month, and he was just outside my tube station.

Johanna: Hob.

Hob: His umbrella'd broken and he was soaking wet, and he looked absolutely miserable, poor darling.

Johanna: ...

Hob: So I offered him towels and dry clothes, since my flat was just up the road. And by the time the rain stopped I knew I wanted to marry him, and he said yes.

Johanna: what lunatic just follows strange men home?

Hob: he was pretty suspicious until I gave him my phone so he could text my address to his sister.

Johanna: and she was somehow fine with it, like 'yeah, go on'?


Hob:

Hob: he got a bit distracted by my phone background and never actually texted her.

Johanna: the fuck

Hob: you know Julian of Norwich is gorgeous

Johanna: your cat is a lesser demon escaped from hell. I'm going to exorcise your cat someday

Hob: Jules is a sweetheart. She doesn't even hunt birds!

Johanna: That thing won't kill any of the bloody birds in your neighborhood because she's saving all her energy to someday murder me and you know it.

Hob: ... undeserved paranoia about my extremely photogenic cat aside --

Johanna: WELL-deserved!

Hob: --will you be my witness?

Johanna: Left it a bit late, if you're asking me today. Did everybody else say no?

Hob: Didn't ask anybody else. Been planning to ask you since Dream said yes, but I figured if I gave you too much notice you'd flee the country.

Johanna: [tearing up, because even if you're an independent badass, it's nice to hear you're somebody's person] you're fucking right I would.

(Johanna's custom ringtone on Hob's phone is from Sweeney Todd, the final verse in Johanna where you can hear the body drop ("Wake up, Johanna, another bright red day"), because Hob and Johanna are black-hearted bastards/absolutely in cahoots with each other and think it’s funny. Hob's ringtone is Being Alive from Company ("Somebody need me too much...").  Sondheim all the way, motherfuckers)

[vivalas-vega]

real friends / jake ‘hangman’ seresin x reader / part three

hehe two parts in one day. it’s my weekend and I was on a roll. here’s a long fluffy, kinda sad but mostly silly chapter!!! turns out cobra is a bigger softy than she lets on ;)

real friends / jake ‘hangman’ seresin x reader / part three

add yourself to my taglist

one / two 

word count: 4k

warnings: language, hangman is whipped

tag list: @potato-girl99981 @olliepig @roosters-girl @angelbabyange @loveforaugust​ 

The air was growing suffocating in your car as you pondered your options… sat along the side of a deserted road just outside of the city you cursed yourself for not springing for a new car when you had the chance. Something about saving the money for something else because your old girl had never failed you. You opened your phone as you manually rolled the window down and clicked Rooster’s contact.

“Hey honey, what’s up?” he answered, sounding out of breath.

“Hey Roo, I need- are you okay? You sound like you’re being chased.” 

“Well… that’s because I am.”

“Uh… okay? Why?” you asked, laughing a little.

“I’m actually- uh, oh fuck.” You frowned a little as you heard grunting on the other end, “I’m on a date. Had the idea of taking her to laser tag but I’m getting my ass beat. Did you need something?” 

“No, nevermind, enjoy your date. Use protection.” you said, sighing as you hung up. You mentally ran through your list of options… Phoenix was spending time with her girlfriend, Coyote and Fanboy were seeing a movie they’ve been talking about for weeks on end, Bob had taken a quick trip to see his family, Payback had said something along the lines of ‘if any of you call me over this break I will personally see to it you’re shot out of the sky’, which only left you with one option. You could call a tow, but it really only seemed as if you needed a jumpstart, calling would be a slightly over dramatic and costly reaction to your current predicament. With a groan you clicked Hangman’s contact, bringing it to your ear as it rang.

“Well I’ll be, a phone call? In the middle of the day? Knew you’d realize I was irresistible sooner or later.” You could practically hear the smirk.

“Can it. I need your help.” Your nerves were fried as you opened your car door, stepping out into the San Diego heat which was only a few degrees cooler than the inside of your car, not giving you the respite you were hoping for.

“What’s going on, are you okay?” Any sense of teasing was gone and was instead replaced with urgent concern. 

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine but uh… well my car is not. I drove out to La Jolla and took a wrong turn somewhere and old Betsy thought this was the best possible place to give out on me. I think I just need a jump,” you sighed, walking around to the front of your car and leaning on the hood.

“Betsy?” he questioned, and you could already hear the sound of his keys and his car door closing in the background.

“Betsy is my car, I’m taking no further questions on the matter.” 

“Alright, drop a pin I’ll be there as soon as I can.” You hung up and did what he asked, looking around you and trying to figure out what to do to pass the time while you waited. You walked around to the back of your car, propping the windshield up, dropping the tailgate and hopping on. You rooted around in the back, grabbing your emergency kit and pulling out some long expired granola bars, a change of clothes and a few bottles of water. You quickly chugged an entire bottle before grabbing the pair of gym shorts and walking around the side of your car, quickly removing your yoga pants and slipping them on after taking a few glances in either direction. You returned to your previous perch, opening Instagram and mindlessly scrolling, leaving a rather lewd albeit supportive comment on Phoenix’s most recent selfie, and a thumbs down emoji on Rooster’s gym pictures. 

Checking the time you’d realized it’d been about fifteen minutes since texting Hangman and hoped he’d be here soon. The heat was really starting to get to you and you pulled your oversized tee off and threw it somewhere in your car, desperate to feel even a little bit of a breeze as you sat now just in your sports bra and shorts. Sure enough as you were struggling to turn an abandoned book into a makeshift fan you heard the crunch of gravel as a car pulled up, and you walked around your car to see Hangman with what looked like an ice cold bottle of water. 

“Sorry it took a while, made a pit stop because I thought you’d want this,” he said, tossing it to you and you caught it with ease, immediately pressing it to your neck. 

“You thought right, thank you,” you said, watching as he popped the hood of your car. 

“Alright, let’s see if we can get this old bat running.” You watched as he connected both of your cars, scowling when he swatted your hand away as you tried to help. “What were you up to today?”

“Hike, there’s a really beautiful spot in Torrey Pines. I’d heard about a good brunch spot away from the beach but apparently my navigational skills are shit when I’m not in the air.” 

“Should be good, go give her a whirl,” he said as he got into his truck and started the engine. You let out a groan as your engine made a valiant effort to come back to life, but ultimately decided against giving you a win today. You shook your head at him as he watched you through his windshield and he turned it off and hopped out, disconnecting the cables and taking a look around. He pulled out your dipstick, absolutely barren, spare the last half inch that had a glob of dark brown sludge hanging onto the end and he just looked at you in horror. “Sweetheart, when was the last time you got an oil change?”

“Uh, well…” you took a moment to peer inside your car, looking at the sticker and reading when you were supposed to get your last change, “says here I was supposed to get it at 183,457 miles.”

“And how many miles are you currently at?” You checked the odometer.

“189,433.” 

“Jesus fucking Christ,” he muttered, replacing the stick and putting his hands on his hips as he looked at you with what you assumed was his best ‘disapproving dad’ look. “It’s honestly a miracle it just died on you and you didn’t blow a gasket or worse.” 

“I forgot,” you shrugged.

“The sticker is right there! Like, literally, right in front of you every time you’re driving.” 

“I’m a responsible driver, I don’t look anywhere but the road.” 

“Responsible driver,” he mumbled, shaking his head and pulling out his phone, “so responsible you go almost six thousand miles past your oil change requirements,” he continued mumbling as he pressed the phone to his ear. 

“Who are you calling?” He looked at you like you had two heads.

“Who am I- a fucking tow truck.” he said exasperated and you raised your hands in surrender. You listened as he gave directions to the tow company and sighed as you looked at your car, knowing the last time you took her in for work the mechanic strongly recommended you let him keep it for scrap. “Come on, they’ll be here soon,” he opened the passenger side and you climbed in, grateful when he turned the AC on.

“Thank you for coming to witness the death of my car,” you said, giving him a small smile.

“Can I ask why you’re still driving that junker around?”

“Watch your mouth, Betsy is an old bird but she still has a heart… feelings,” you said, pointing a finger at him and he chuckled at your angry expression, “I’m serious!” You leaned across the console to hit his chest. “I’ve had her since high school, she was my mom’s car before she got passed along to me. I have a lot of memories in there, her driving me to and from practices, school dances… I had a lot of my firsts in there once I got her.” You looked ahead at Betsy, in all her glory, with her hood propped open and covered in dust from the unpaved road.

“Okay, so take a photo and keep it in a scrapbook.” 

You sighed, “you don’t get it… I’ve shipped her everywhere I’ve been stationed, she literally saw me through diapers to where I am now. Every version of myself has been in that car,” you said sadly. 

“Honey, she’s unsafe at this point.”

“I know, I just… I didn’t want to let her go.” Just as you said this the tow truck pulled up and you rushed out to meet him, the two of you standing off to the side while he examined the engine. 

“Sorry kid, but I don’t think there’s anything I can do.” You nodded, looking at Hangman before turning back to the mechanic.

“Can you uh, I just need a minute.” you said, getting into the car and closing the door. Your hands gripped the steering wheel as you took a deep breath, “well, old girl, looks like the time has finally come.” You looked into the backseat, feeling emotion bubble up as you saw where your car seat had once rested, where you sang along to Britney Spears with your childhood friends, where Luke Something had deflowered you on your prom night, where you crammed a few boxes and a suitcase before departing for the Naval Academy. You pulled the mix of high school graduation tassels, your first set of dog tags, and a horribly tacky necklace Henry had bought you from a gumball machine from the rearview mirror before grabbing any relevant items from the glove compartment and front seat. You held the mix of items in your lap, taking one final moment and affectionately rubbing the dashboard. “Thank you, Betsy. You’ve been the best adventure buddy a girl could ask for.” 

You got out with a sigh, wiping a few tears away with your freehand as you precariously held the mix of memories and your purse under your arm and Hangman quickly grabbed them for you, placing them in the cab of his truck. The mechanic had since closed your hood, and you took a moment to do what Hangman had suggested and snapped a photo, fighting back another round of tears as you approached the mechanic to give him your information to bill for the tow.

“Don’t worry about it kid, don’t think I could charge you in good faith when you’re this torn up.”

“No, I don’t want to waste your time-”

“I’ll get money from the scrap, word of advice… get a new car this go around, and change the oil.” he said waving you off and you couldn’t help but start crying.

“Honey, it’s just a car,” Hangman said, pulling you into his side as you watched the man and his helper load her up onto the back, “you still have the memories.”

“They’re taking her for scrap. She’s going to be stripped and sold for parts,” you all but blubbered and he soothingly rubbed your back as you wrapped your arms around him. “What a terribly dishonorable way to go.” He continued to hold you as they began to pull away, and you buried your face in his chest, not being able to bear the sight. 

“Oh, sweetheart,” he murmured, squeezing you tight. He couldn’t help but find the whole thing adorable, your deep attachment to the car and the way you cried as if it was a dear friend ripped from you too soon, and not a car he would have guessed was on its last leg about five years ago. “Okay honey, here’s what we’re going to do,” he pulled away slightly once you’d calmed down, wiping the tears from your cheeks and noting how you kept your arms right where they’d been, tightly wrapped around him. “We’re going to head down to the nearest car dealership,” you started shaking your head, feeling another wave of tears coming on, “no, no no,” he wiped them before they could fall, “we’re going to go to the dealership, we’re going to find the car that reminds you the most of Betsy, and we’re going to get you all squared away with her, okay?” You sniffled and nodded, finally detaching yourself from him and dejectedly getting into the truck. 

“I’m sure this is not how you planned on spending your day,” you finally said as you made your way back into the city.

“Certainly not, but I’m glad to be here in your time of need. It’s what friends are for,” he said, shooting you a smile before returning his attention to the road and you nodded.

“It must look rather silly, getting so worked up over a car.”

“Not at all, you had a lot of big milestones with Betsy, I know it must be hard letting her go.” He reached behind the seat at a red light, grabbing two pieces of metal and placing them in your lap, “had the mechanic take that off for you while you were saying goodbye.” Your fingers wrapped around the metallic word of the make of your car, the identifying emblem that was covered in nicks and scratches, the foil peeling around the edges and the dusty license plate.

“Jake,” you sighed, looking over at him, “that was… this is really thoughtful, thank you.” You smiled at him, fighting another wave of emotion. You pulled into a car lot, surrounded by newer, shinier cars that in your mind didn’t hold a candle to your own but figured they would have to do. He reached behind the seat again, rooting around in his gym bag and procuring a well-worn Top Gun shirt.

“Not that I don’t love this view,” his eyes glancing down at your chest, “but I’m sure you don’t want creepy car salesmen thinking the same.” You were momentarily disappointed, remembering you’d left your top and yoga pants in the back of the car but let it go before slipping the shirt over your head, trying not to dwell too much on how it smelled like Jake.

“I don’t want you thinking it either, Bagman,” you muttered, accepting his hand as he helped you jump out of the truck.

“Hey, there she is,” he nudged your shoulder as you walked in the front door, immediately greeted by an overly eager salesman and his rather pungent cheap cologne. He led you over to a table where you rattled off a list of things you were looking for… Four wheel drive, AC, noted that upgrading to a bluetooth system wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world and before you knew it you were strolling through the lot looking at potential options.

“What about this one?” Hangman asked, gesturing towards a Jeep, and the man opened the drivers side so you could hop in. 

“It smells new,” you observed as Hangman got in next to you.

“Well, that’s because it is.”

“I want the faint cigarette and weed smoke smell I dedicated my entire high school career to embedding into the upholstery.” He chuckled at this, beginning to point out all the cool features.

“Wouldn’t it be nice to have your GPS right here, instead of dangerously on your phone?” he asked, pointing to the screen in the dashboard.

“It’s so fancy.”

“Sweetheart, I hate to break it to you but this is actually pretty standard as far as new cars go.”

You scoffed before taking a moment to look around, “I guess it’s not terrible.”

“See? And it's not quite the same shade of green as Betsy, but it’s close, right?”

“Yeah,” you mumbled, fiddling with the rearview mirror. 

“What do you think? I think it’ll be great for all your new adventures and new memories.” he prodded, trying to get you excited about it. 

“It’ll do,” you nodded and he pumped his fist, deciding to take what he could get as you climbed out of the car.

“She’ll take it.” 

-----

You later found yourself at the Hard Deck, nursing a spicy margarita as Hangman desperately tried to raise your spirits. Rooster and Phoenix walked in, talking about the sexy Jeep in the parking lot and you groaned, head colliding with the wooden bar top and they both looked at you confused.

“What did you do to her?” Rooster asked, placing a hand on your back.

“Me? What did I do? Oh, I don’t know, just rescued her off the side of the road and spent the better part of my day trying to get her stoked about her new ride.”

“The Jeep is yours?” Phoenix asked, accepting a beer from Penny.

“Yes,” you mumbled against your arm.

“And we’re upset about this?” Rooster asked.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” 

“We had to put Betsy to rest, it’s been a rough day.” Hangman explained and you just made an unintelligible noise.

“Betsy?” Rooster and Phoenix asked at the same time and Hangman just shook his head as you stood from the bar suddenly, ignoring the headrush and making your way to the jukebox.

“It’s like you people don’t even know me,” you muttered.

“I think this is a good time to mention this is her fourth margarita,” Hangman said, watching as you fumbled with the buttons.

“Fifth,” Penny corrected, causing the aviators to all look at her, “she pounded another one when you went to the bathroom.” They returned their attention to you, blinking incredulously as the sounds of Angel rang throughout the bar, causing every other patron to look your way confused and slightly annoyed. 

“Oh my god,” Rooster said, mouth agape as he took in the scene before him.

“I didn’t even know this was on the jukebox,” Penny said. Phoenix stifled a laugh, watching as you leaned against the piano, clutching your drink with your eyes closed.

“I don’t think she was this upset when I almost died,” Rooster said, eyes growing concerned as you swayed before catching yourself and sinking onto the piano bench. 

“Dude, you didn’t even see her on the side of the road. I’ve never seen her show so much emotion that wasn’t anger,” Hangman said.

“I can hear you.” you half-yelled, taking another sip of your drink and humming along to the song. “In the arms of the angel, fly awaaaay from here,” you sang drunkenly, and horribly out of tune and Rooster couldn’t contain it any longer, turning towards Penny as he laughed.

“Oh, this is bad,” Phoenix said, also succumbing to her giggles. 

“Guys. Guys, guys,” you whisper shouted, gesturing them over and they slowly approached you, “a toast, to Betsy.” you said, sticking your now nearly-empty glass in the air.

“To Betsy,” they all said almost in the form of a question as they clinked their glasses to yours.

“It is customary,” you paused to hiccup, “at a wake to say nice things.” You looked at the rest of them expectantly, who looked at each other with wide eyes. 

“Uh, Betsy was… well, she was a great car, very… vibrant?” Rooster said, hoping it would satisfy you and you nodded along.

“Yes she was,” you mumbled.

“Truly a dependable car, there when you needed her,” Phoenix said.

“You have no idea,” you sniffled.

“I was only there for her final moments, and she went with grace.” Hangman finished and you held your glass up, Rooster biting his lip to contain himself as you cheers’d again. 

“What the fuck is going on?” Fanboy asked, as him and Coyote walked in the bar and Penny just shook her head.

“Apparently a wake, don’t ask.” She said, setting two beers in front of them. The rest of the evening went by smoothly, the gang slipping into their usual routine with the added running of interference to keep you from playing sad songs on the jukebox. You watched as Rooster and Phoenix played pool, drinking the water Penny had insisted you switch to as your eyes grew rather heavy. 

“You ready to head home, sweetheart?” Hangman asked, stepping in front of you and taking your glass to set on the table and you just nodded. “Did you come with Rooster?” he asked Phoenix who nodded and he fished your keys from your purse and pulled the car fob off to toss to her, “drive her car home whenever you’re done, I’ll cover your Uber.” He scooped you up as you half-heartedly waved to everyone, smiling as they told you to feel better.

“He’s so whipped,” Fanboy said, chuckling as the group watched you leave. 

“Jake?” you asked as he buckled you into his truck and he looked down at you expectantly, “you’re a pretty good friend.” 

“That I am, and you’re hammered, princess, so we’re going to get you home, okay?” He closed the door gently and jogged around to the drivers side, sighing as he saw you already falling asleep against the window. On the short drive to your house he thought to himself that he should have been annoyed, spending a day fetching you from the side of the road in the blazing heat, placating you as you cried, taking care of you while you drank yourself numb to toast the memory of a car but he wasn’t, not in the slightest. He honestly wouldn’t have rather been anywhere else than by your side during your time of need, and he wasn’t sure how he felt about the way his heart clenched when he saw your sleeping form in his truck, looking so peaceful in stark contradiction to the slight rings of mascara around your eyes. Even as he carried you to your porch, precariously balancing you as he fumbled to get your front door open he couldn’t find it in himself to muster a Hangman-esque comment, all he wanted to do was get you into bed safe and sound. 

You whined as he set you upright on your bed, forcing you to stay sitting as he crouched before you to pull off your sneakers, “are you a socks-on or socks-off person for bed?” he asked.

“Off, do you think I’m some sort of psycho?” 

He chuckled, “after today I’m not really sure what you are, darlin’.” He slipped them off and helped you crawl under the covers, disappearing momentarily to get you a glass of water and root around your kitchen cabinets until he found the ibuprofen, which he set on your nightstand when he returned. “Okay, honey, take those first thing when you wake up. I’ll call you in the morning,” he patted your shoulder as he went to take his leave and you forced your eyes open to look at him.

“You’re going?” you asked, your voice so small he couldn’t help but chuckle. 

“It appears my duties have been fulfilled.”

“I don’t think so,” you responded and he looked down inquisitively, “will you stay?” you asked, patting the bed beside you.

“Luring me into your quarters at this time of night? What do you take me for, a floozy?” he joked, placing a hand on his chest.

“That’s exactly what I take you for.”

“That’s insulting, sweetheart. As tempting as you’re making this sound, I think you should get some rest.” You just pawed at his hand gripping it and looking up at him with the saddest puppy dog eyes you could muster. He sighed, leaning up to turn your lamp off and walking around your bed, where he internally debated whether or not he should keep his shorts on. He decided to slip them off, already knowing you’d pitch a fit if you felt the rough chino fabric rub against you in the night and slid in beside you, careful to keep a safe distance, but that went out the window as you curled up against him, his arm instinctively raising so you could rest your head on his chest.

“Jake?” you asked and he hummed in acknowledgement, “thank you for today. It was really very cool of you.” You felt his chest rumble below you as he chuckled.

“Anytime, sweetheart, get some sleep,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of your head and rubbing along your back as he waited for the sound of your breathing to even out. Looking down at your arm wrapped around him, head nuzzled into his chest he wiped his free hand along his face as he sighed. 

“You’re going to be the death of me.”

previous part / next part

[icycream24]

Silver and Espio for the ask meme? :>

hehehe my favs hehee🤤🤤🤤

SILVER:

I think most ppl don't know, but I used to really dislike Silver when I was first introduced to this character online. Not a game, no no, but YouTube AMV vids of this dude with cutesy shippy art of Silvaze. His portrayal was so degraded to me (I was 11 at that time?) that I believed he was a self-insert character for some popular artists to ship themselves with Blaze, in the girl-boss dynamic. Ofc, I looked for more info online and realised Silver was an actual character.

At that time I was playing Sonic Riders Zero Gravity and only unlocked Shadow/Rouge/Cream. After knowing what characters were avaliable, I tried my best to unlock the rest, including Silver. I also did not like his voice in English at that time, so much that I decided to switch the voice-overs to Japanese. And I also did not like it 😂 Not because it was grading! But more like, I was shocked by the drastic difference between the two. Kid me had to decide which portrayal I prefer more (ofc not aware of narrative difference of the scripts, I just chose based on my preference) and ended up with Japanese bc I vibe with the calm seriousness in the voice more. Eventually I did get used to both voices after more exposure of this character, watching playthrough videos online.

Talking about watching 06, I was not expecting him to be so different from my first impression of this "whiny/incapable/loser" kid. Silver actually was serious about fighting for his future, like a dedicated soldier. Blaze was *not* the girl-boss, she was on equal grounds with Silver. (Really... I was like 11/12, now that I think about it, how come ppl's comprehension skills so drastically apart that we can get totally different character interpretations?) I started to find charming traits on Silver, and that was when I started looking up for this character's info more & more.

And then I discovered the Rivals series. I watched the whole thing, 1&2, and this Espio character... Wait they're kinda nice tgt. (it was year 2012?? AAAAA I can't believe I'm still insane about Espilver/Silvespio, they're my sons now at this point 😭✨) I remember using Skype and talked about the ✨chemistry✨ between Silver & Espio, and my friend said I was tripping 😭

Anyway here's Espio:

At that time I didn't have that much knowledge on Espio, I just thought their Eng voice in Heroes sounded like he's dying in a few years with how gruff & grandpa it sounded LOL. Mostly I only draw him with Silver bc I realised no one shipped these two back then. (there was ppl but there was no tags for them) So I felt like, no, impossible. I need to COOK for them! So I started shipping them like FedEx with my limited skills 🥴

My Espio appriciation was mainly started by shipping him with Silver. As I reflect on why I enjoy this ship so much, I dug up traits that I like about Espio. He was helpful, supportive, and overall has a rather peaceful way of communicating with others (aka SILVER hhh). Compared to other characters, especially in Rivals, he was really chill and kept his head clear, and unconditionally aided Silver simply bc he knew he was helping someone with a good cause. Such admirable traits that I'd say are pretty rare even irl.

Still, Espio did not have that much screen time. His portrayal in my mind I do admit was half canon, half fanon. Silly ninja with goofy teammates that values teamwork & is capable of aiding others, plus saint-like patience & wisdom. (Haha...really, a lot of his traits are get from Rivals 2, his ways of interacting with individuals was way more informative than games & anime shows combined 🤧)

But yeah, with time I like these 2 characters even more, started to make all kinds of headcanons that I won't be able to elaborate here. The texts are already getting too long here 😂 I've imagined them, either tgt or separately, in fluff/angst/spice/AU/wholesome/dead dove/anything really bc I just enjoy these two so much 💕

It's kinda selfish to say, but with how little Espilver there was during that time, it was almost like they got a clean slate & I was not swayed by any other ppl's interpretation of these two for a few years. And ofc by time these two surely became my favorite characters. LOL I realised in my busy years of not drawing often, Silver & Espio were the only characters I drew 😂

UGGGHHHAA I love these two sm 😭✨ thanks for asking hahah I wanna talk about them all day 🤧✨

[dr-wuffles]

New Pinned Post, Yahooo

Fucking hey and welcome to our corner of the internet!

Our name is Juniper and we are a 9 alter plural system!

We mainly made this blog to express ourselves and chat about our special interests. Expect Horny posting and potentially nudes Feel free to dm us! The asks are open regardless of who you are.

Selfies are under #Juniper Selfies , Our alter tags are listed below!

We'll update the pinned as things change or if we have new alters, so check frequently!

No Minors, Have your age in bio or pinned please!

We blog way too much about homestuck, and other funny animated media we are obsessed with. You can also find our writing kicking around here, as well as whatever is on our minds.

For pronouns:

System/collective: She/They 🏳️‍⚧️

The Juniper System!

Joan (she/they)

Soft-Spoken, Bookworm, Mousegirl, Thinks Pavlov could've gone a bit further, Toxic type: Catgirls

Quincy (He/Him)

Femboy, Terezi Kinnie, Unethical kink extraordinaire, Wants a pussy the most out of all the alters

Elizabeth (She/Her)

Precise, Tea Snob, cat girl, spoiled bratty princess with a tendency for an ostentatious amount of camp, Horny for robot girls

Elliot (It/It's)

Bubbly, Bouncy, Cute, Certified silly enby Kobold, May or may not actually be a dragon, Wants a horde more than anything else. Gender is a construct and sister I am jailbreaking it

Madeline (She/Her)

Certified Bad butch here to blow some minds. Loud lesbian, gender fuck, punk ass motherfucker. Vriska Serket Fictive, do not be annoying about it.

Alex (Pup/Pups/Pupself)

Puppyboygirl, emotional support lesbian, service top (occasionally a dom~~), wants to pick you up so badly; Lender of the girlfriend jackets, needs you to hold her leash while she fucks you

Xandra/Xander (She/He)

Wolfboygirl, bigender, teddy bear, perpetually tired, likes it when you're a lil mean, switch currently leaning sub, Sadly needs to be responsible. Mom vibes.

Percy (He/They/She)

Squirrelboy, anxious as fuck, definitely the one who got a lot of the artistic brainrot, loves to write, especially overly complicated and stupidly verbose bullshit, the definition of a sad gay theater kid

Castor (She, Fae, He, They, It)

Gay nonbinary space cow, enjoys all things shiny and has a habit of collecting anything foil. Incredibly Pagan, Always excited to discuss tea recommendations or gardening. Loves you very much. ---

In light of recent events: we have a discord!!! Its: Dr.Wuffles . Even if we haven't dmed pr followed back here, shoot us a friend request and tell us your blog name! We'll gladly add you and let you know what platform we moved too. Who knows? Maybe with enough folks we'll make a server.

Be safe yall, we love you🩷💙💚💜🩵💛❤️🧡🤍

[darklydeliciousdesires]

The Dream - Chapter Twenty Five.

Double update time today, besties! I kind of want to get the posting of this done with so I can have a break, also from noticing interest beginning to wane slightly. I totally get it, people are busy (I bloody know I am right now!) and we all have lives to lead outside of the fandom. But yeah, I guess that’s my fault in that it makes my insecurity rear its ugly head, making me question myself when I notice people quietening. I’m not seeking any empathy or anything like that, I’m just speaking from a place of honesty.

I know I need to improve, and I will. I’ll be taking a break from longer stories after this one to go away and do just that. @withmyteeth​ gave me some truly superb advice on where I needed to improve, so I’ve been taking that on board with writing. I’m feeling positive I’ll be able to come back better. 

Thanks to those of you who continue to engage, though. You’re very sweet and I appreciate you. You’re the ones I want to do better for, not just for myself! 

Previous chapters - Prologue  One  Two  Three  Four  Five  Six  Seven  Eight  Nine  Ten  Eleven  Twelve  Thirteen  Fourteen  Fifteen  Sixteen  Seventeen  Eighteen  Nineteen  Twenty Twenty One  Twenty Two  Twenty Three  Twenty Four

Tag list - In the comments, please DM to be added/removed (note: those not engaging will be automatically removed from the tag list, FYI)

Words - 2,380

Warnings - 18+ content throughout, minors DNI!

“What?”  

She truly hadn’t expected the decibels of his reply, especially not since he’d done so well in her being away for three months, but Keri’s revelation that she would only be home for eleven days before jetting off to Ireland for Luke’s sister’s wedding, well, it didn’t go down well with Angel. “You’ve only just got home!”

“Baby, I know, but it won’t be for long. Five days includes travel time,” she began, leaning back against the units in the kitchen. “I leave on Wednesday, Saoirse's wedding is on the Saturday, and I’ll be home the following Monday. It really isn’t a big thing.”

“But you only just arrived back, and now you want to go away again?”  

Oh, god. “I thought we’d dealt with this, Angel.” Her attempt to placate him was met with hostility, Angel throwing himself out of the chair at the kitchen table, stomping towards the door. “Come on, you’re being silly now. You always knew I’d travel with my work.”

“You’ll be with him again.”

Her brows furrowed. “Him?”  

“Yeah!” he yelled, pulling his phone out as he stuffed his feet into his boots. “This asshole!” Turning the screen of his phone, he showed her a picture she’d uploaded to her Instagram, a selfie she’d taken with Dolores, Roisin and Luke, three members of the band, Roisin and Luke kissing a cheek each, Dolores crouched beneath her chin, winking while bobbing her tongue out at the camera.

Keri couldn’t believe her ears. “You seriously have an issue with Luke? Roisin is kissing me, too, but you’re strangely quiet about her being an asshole! Then again, she doesn’t have a dick, does she?”

He was quiet then, reloading his retort, but Keri gave him no chance. His girlfriend was a mild-mannered sweetheart, but boy, if somebody put a match near her gas tank... Boom. Especially if they were casting aspersions. “Do you really think you have anything to worry about? Angel, we’re been together for eight months now, you know who I am. Do you really have me pegged as a cheater, or are you looking for an excuse to blow up just because you don’t want me going away again so soon?”

“I trust you, not him.”  

This wasn’t anything to do with Luke, and she knew it. This was his abandonment issue, rearing its ugly head, Keri realised, reaching for him. He pulled from her, though. “I gotta get to the yard.”

She shook her head in confusion. “You told me you had the day off?”

“Yeah? And you told me I mattered. Not enough for you to stick around long.” The slam of the door behind him vibrated the frame, Keri sighing, considering going after him. He likely needed to cool off, so she left it. In leaving it, though, she felt the agitation pouring through her veins, deciding to do something about it. Angel wasn’t a messy guy, but still, his house got the once over, everywhere smelling of polish, cleaning spray and fabric freshener once she was done, looking over at her suitcase.  

Clean clothes were a must.  

The laundromat was two blocks away from the weed shop, so with all of her dirty clothing items set on a hot wash, Keri trudged down in search of a friendly face, taking coffee and some doughnuts with her, too. She was greeted by all the warmth she needed, Sharise shrieking in surprise, rushing out behind the counter. She only just about had chance to place the items she carried down before receiving her beautiful friend in her arms, the girls embracing tightly.  

“I missed you so much!” she cried, holding Keri’s face in her hands, kissing her cheek.  

“I missed you too, lady,” she replied with warmth, rocking her in her arms, kissing her head as she pointed to the coffee and doughnuts. “Break time?”

“Let me just get these guys sorted and I’ll be right with you.” A half ounce of blueberry kush and an eighth of AK-47 later, and Sharise was free to join Keri in the back room, seating themselves in the former’s small office.  

“So, how is it being back?”  

Keri finished her mouthful of doughnut before replying. “I’m currently fighting the jetlag, still being on Australian time means my body thinks it should be asleep right now, but I’m doing what everyone says is best and just trying to keep busy, power through it. And it was going really well, until this morning when I revealed to Angel that I’m going over to Ireland again in eleven days' time to photograph a wedding. He blew up at me massively. I thought we’d gotten past that, with how well he’d handled it while I was away in Australia.”

She went on to detail the ins and outs of their argument, Sharise listening intently before weighing in. She knew she had to walk a fine line, what with Angel being her family but Keri also becoming a close friend. A little confliction rooted within her, but sipping her coffee, she chose honesty in the end. “Listen, he did handle it well, I was proud of him, but his sheen wasn’t quite as bright without you here. He missed you, he’s so in love with you and all he could do was count down the days until you came back to him.  

“However, that doesn’t mean he was right to explode at you, or accuse that Luke guy of anything nefarious, but like you say, he only likely did it to try and legitimise his abandonment issues, and not want to bring it back to those again. I think you did the right thing in letting him go cool off, because he’ll know he’s been an ass, but he won’t want to immediately admit to that. You’re right, too. You can’t put your life on hold for his comfort levels, so he’s gotta deal with it.”

Keri nodded, slumping in her seat a little. “I thought he already had, and that’s what kicks me in the guts most about it. He doesn’t need to feel so threatened by me not being around. I wish he’d settle and realise that just because there’ll be times when I’m physically far, my heart is always with him.”

“See, that’s the thing with Angel. He isn’t used to having a girlfriend with that kind of lifestyle. I mean, if he and Lucy had gone the distance, it would have been the same. She’ll likely have to do book tours once her cookbook comes out, she’s very ambitious just like you are, but for Angel, he almost can’t separate that. I think it’s because his own life has been so firmly rooted in Santo Padre. He likes the idea of having someone who’s always there for him, and the idea of them not being so frightens him, brings up everything about his mom’s death,” she explained, Keri nodding deeply.

“I know, and I do feel bad now for yelling at him. Underneath the veneer of big, bad outlaw wolf, he’s a little wounded cub, and I want to make that better for him, but he has to help himself, too. He can’t just explode and think I’ll change my mind because he’s being difficult. I won’t. I love him, he’s the absolute love of my life, but I won’t put that life on hold just to make him feel more secure.”  

It was a tough situation to be in and Sharise sympathised, advising that she should at least try and talk to him again once he returned home later, but that ultimately, she was right. It was Angel’s issue to deal with, not hers. After Keri left to go and pile her laundry into the dryer, Sharise quietly thought to herself that her brother-in-law truly did need to sort out his mess there, because Keri wasn’t the kind of girl who would placate him forever if he continually threw distrust at her, no matter how much she loved him.  

While Keri was sitting at the laundromat awaiting her clothes to dry, she sat and contemplated much the same, a realisation hitting her. This truly was the obelisk, but god, how she hoped it wouldn’t be a fatal disagreement. The saddest part was, though, that she realised only too clearly if Angel couldn’t get his head straight with the idea of her being away from him, it likely would be. She couldn’t handle it, him berating her because of his own insecurity, especially if he was only prepared to overcome it for short periods, before reverting once more to entertaining what her being away stirred within him.

It filled her with nothing but dread, knowing that if this continued, she would have no choice but to walk away from him. It was a bitter pill to swallow, for she loved him with her entire heart, but she saw no choice if he didn’t want to get better, or let in room for healthy growth where his insecurities were concerned.  

Tears prickled her eyes, Keri wiping them quickly, not wanting to draw attention to herself at the instant heartbreak that trying to imagine a life without Angel in it had stirred, reaching for her phone, seriously contemplating for a few moments whether she should contact Luke and tell him she couldn’t make it. She stopped, though, realising that if she did, Angel would know that an outburst would be all it took in the future in order for her to toe the line for the sake of his comfort.  

No matter how much she loved him and wanted to ease his insecurity, she couldn’t do that.  

She wouldn’t do that.  

He was a grown man of thirty-six, her a young woman of twenty-three. He needed to be the one who did better, without her placating him. After her clothes were dry, she loaded up the huge IKEA bag she’d bundled them into, heading home and ironing everything, placing them away in the wardrobe and drawers before fixing herself a late lunch. As much as she tried to stay awake, putting on a Netflix documentary she’d been waiting to have the time to sit down and enjoy in full, she ended up asleep on the sofa, not waking until 9pm.  

Angel still wasn’t home.  

Calling him, the phone rang out, so she sent him a message, asking when he’d be home. By eleven thirty, she could see he’d read it, but hadn’t replied. She tried calling again, the call being cut dead this time after three rings. So, he knew very well she wanted to talk to him, but this was how he was going to deal with it.  

‘Angel, please come home, or call me. We need to talk about this. Love you xx’ The message was read within minutes, but by 1am, he still had neither returned to her or replied.

“Well, this is on you if you’re choosing to behave this way.” The next thing she did was to call up her browser and book a ticket to Utah for the following day. If he wasn’t going to even try with her, then she’d just leave him to it for a while, go and spend some time with the people who she’d missed just as much as she had him, give him time to figure it all out. She didn’t want to spend any further time away, but the fact that she lay alone in bed all night without him returning didn’t give her a lot of options.  

It was 6am when he finally returned, looking worse for wear, his eyes violet with tiredness, his face sour. Especially when he saw her suitcase packed again by the front door. Hurt flashed his eyes as he turned to view her sitting on the couch while he pointed at the luggage. “Where you going?”

“Home,” she replied simply. “If your idea of us fixing this issue is to ignore me and stay out all night, then I’m not gonna stick around to be treated like that. You obviously want some time away from me, Angel, so I’m going to give you that. I don’t want to, I’ve missed you so much and all I want is for us to talk about this, but I think you’ve made your feelings clear there.”

His face darkened, sliding his kutte off and hanging it up, shrugging. “Fine.” The word slipped from his mouth like a biting frost, glaring at her before he walked to the bedroom, slamming the door behind him. She could have cried, but she didn’t, following him into the bedroom to retrieve her bag and cell. “Keri just fucking leave me alone.”

“So that’s it, huh? From your perspective, this is how you want to leave things between us?”

He turned to her, his glare fixed in place. “You’re the one doing the leaving.”  

She was staunch in her reply, sighing, closing her eyes tightly for a moment in an attempt to gather herself. “And you’re the one giving me no choice by refusing to talk about it. Angel, I love you so much, but I’m not going to put my life on hold just to make you feel comfortable. You’re a grown man. You really, really need to resolve this within yourself. Me leaving you isn’t me abandoning you. I’m always coming back, because you’re worth coming back to. Because I want to come back to you. If you can’t figure that out or accept it, then I don’t know where we go from here.”

“Apparently you go home.”

“Yeah,” she scoffed bitterly. “Apparently I do.”  

Picking up her bag and cell, she left, her flight not due to depart for three hours, feeling like she had no choice but to leave early. She didn’t want to, every fibre and bone of her being wanted to go and cuddle up to him for an hour before she had to leave, but she couldn’t. He didn’t want her to, much preferring to stew in his own ridiculous handling of the situation.  

The tears she’d successfully managed to hold onto in the house came as soon as she pulled off and drove down the street, wondering truly if that was it for them.  

She hoped to god that it wasn’t.

[panda-writes-kpop]

Rating How Delulu You Are Based On Your Bias (GG Edition)

Disclaimer: This is all in good fun. Please don't take any of the jabs in this with sincerity - my sense of humor involves teasing that can be seen as mean at times, but I promise that I have no malicious intent. Although this shouldn't be needed, I would rather not end up all over Twitter, Tiktok, or whatever else. I'm also not going to tag this because I don't feel like bringing unknown attention to myself. We cool? ❤️ please don't cancel me. I just like to have some fun as a silly teen girl yk

Anyways, I can't believe I'm 19 🥹 it feels weird that this is my last year as a teen, but I am kind of looking towards my 20s. Thank you all for not only supporting my blog but also me as a person.

That's enough of the sweet and nostalgic things - it's time to get started with what you came here for. 😌😉

Dreamcatcher:

JiU

- like a solid 6/10

- always good to be a little delulu

- honestly thought y'all would be higher bc of the things Minji says

SuA

- 7/10

- can't tell if y'all are delulu for SuA, delulu for SuA being with Siyeon, or a bit of both

- valid any way you slice it bc she's hot-

Siyeon

- ♾️/10

- "siyeon's my wife-" no babes you need therapy there's a difference

- simply touching grass will not do the job, rolling down a grass hill and inhaling some just might do the trick-

Handong

- 4/10

- okay listen y'all are just chill and I love that about you

- and I respect the few fully dedicated soldiers to this women, you deserve nothing but the best 🫶

Yoohyeon

- 8/10

- you understand that you have no endgame with her but you still think she's your girlfriend 🤔

- a chill kind of delulu

Dami

- 100/10

- if y'all have seen those tiktok edits you know exactly what I'm talking about

- "She could run me over with her car-" SEE A THERAPIST (i would let her do worse 🤭)

Gahyeon

- 8/10

- you think she's your girlfriend but she's not, I'm sorry :(

- she takes the best selfies and has legendary photocards so I don't blame you at all for the delulu

Itzy:

Yeji

- 6/10

- Her dancing skills and stage presence makes us all a little delulu tbh

- her stans are chill tho and only come out of the woodwork for comebacks or her individual promotions

Lia

- 2/10 or 10/10

- okay listen Lia biased people either are completely grounded and down to earth or are a permanent resident on delulu island

- I am the latter 🫣 but it's LIA COME ON

Ryujin

♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️♾️/10

- she can't be everyone's wife, you guys, you're not married to her. GET HELP

- I have yet to meet a non-delulu Ryujin biased person and yes that includes myself 😌

Chaeryeong

- 9/10

- a rare breed but you all are DEDICATED to this women

- I don't need to recommend therapy but you all are slowly getting a little too close to that line-

Yuna

- 4/10

- I'm so surprised that this isn't higher because have you SEEN YUNA?!?!?

- SHIN YUNA MY LOVE I ADORE YOU 🥹🫶 Don't worry I'm delulu for you any day of the week 😌

Blackpink:

Jisoo

- 10/10

- Repeat after me: YOU. ARE. NOT. MARRIED. TO. THIS. WOMAN.

- but it's Jisoo so I don't blame you 🤷‍♀️

Jennie

- 8/10

- definitely delulu but you're not as vocal about it

- you're mostly busy trying to fight off this 24/7 shitstorm that people fling at her, and I respect the grind 🫡

Rosé

- 1000/10

- consider journaling as a hobby and stop writing your fantasies on the internet. I BEG OF YOU- (this is also a self call out 🫣)

- "I bet she-" How about we NOT go there?????

Lisa

- 100000000000000/10

- Again, consider journaling as a HOBBY instead posting on the internet

- there's so many of you that the delulu is uncontrollable, so that's why the ranking is so high

[coulsons-fullmetal-cellist]

Terrifying Trypophobia

(Dieter x horror loving female)

Words: 491

Summary: Dieter finds out you have a phobia. This is all based on my personal experience

Warnings: mentions of trypophobia and what can trigger it, don’t worry, will not include pictures only including happy pictures in the banner so look at them if you need to!

Check out masterlist here

Dieter had discovered the one phobia you had, and it was while you were both watching a kids film. He wanted to watch the new BFG film and see if it held up to the 1989 animated one. He thought it wasn’t as charming and delved more into the unnecessary silly but that was beside the point. You were cuddled up next to him enjoying it when suddenly you freaked out and buried yourself in his chest.

“Uh, honey cakes, are you okay there?”

“Yeah,” you mumbled, “Can you just tell me when the scary cucumber is gone?”

“You mean the snozzcumber?” You mumbled an affirmative. “It’s gone now,” and Dieter paused the TV and moved you so you could face him. “What was that?”

You sighed, “So I have this thing called trypophobia.”

“What-a-phobia?”

“Trypophobia. It means having a fear of holes,” you saw the sly look on Dieter’s face and knew what joke he was about to say, “No, not that. It’s to do with a series of holes, it’s hard to explain.”

Dieter reached for his phone, “I’ll look it up.”

“No!” you threw yourself onto his arm like a soldier would on a grenade, “If you do, you’ll get the picture and the picture is horrible, oh it’s horrible!” You were now waving your arms around in reaction to thinking about it but managed to calm down enough. “Some people can’t do beehives. The suit in The Invisible Man triggered a lot of people but I was fine with it. However, if the beehive was in someone’s skin, I’d…” and that set you off again, this time hitting your wrists together nervously.

“That sounds gross.”

“It is. There’s this frog that gives birth through its holes in its skin and…” you were waving your arms around wildly now, “Oh no, I’m thinking about it.”

“Damn, I’ve never seen you like this before.”

“Well, I usually avoid it when I can.” You were now hitting your legs and moaning like you were in pain hoping to help hold off the rising panic.

“Is there anything I can do to help?”

“I need a distraction.”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know…pass me my phone.” He passed it to you, and you swiped it open. “I need my happy picture.”

“Your happy picture?”

“It helps me not think about gross things.” You must have clearly found it because you were staring at the screen and calmed down, slumping against Dieter. He peered over at what you were looking at: it was a picture Dieter took when he one time cheekily stole your phone and took a few selfies, this one of him kissing the screen.

“That’s your happy picture?” You happily hummed in response. “You do know I’m right here, don’t you?”

You slowly looked up at him and the realisation hit you as you slowly opened your mouth like the sloth did in Zootopia.

“Oh, I didn’t think of that.”

Films referenced: The BFG (1989 & 2016), The Invisible Man (2020), Zootopia (2016)

Lovingly tagging @boliv-jenta @simpingcowboy @ellenmunn @o-sacra-virgo-laudes-tibi @brilliantopposite187 @chaithetics @myloveistoolittle

[barkingangelbaby]

first time ever using a sideblog so we'll see how this goes!! I will talk to myself on here most of the time.

do not follow me unless I interact with you first

I just need an online space to be my silly lil self lol, if you recognize me from my nsfw account no u don't! didn't really think about this account being linked to my main one, oh well. mutuals can follow me if u want tho :)

will probably be a mix of shitposts n dumb memes, oversharing, some selfies n pet pics, some talk about my lame ass life, art if i ever make some again, dnd talks n more. who knows!! stay tuned to find out!! any self deprecation/su*cidal posts are in jest (gotta cope somehow)

header is a lil watercolor painting I did a few years ago ♡

I guess you can call me am, i use they/them pronouns but i'm really just a little worm. i'll update my tag list as i start using 'em on here lol.

as always, my little DNI: no minors, no racists, no SWerfs or Terfs, no detrans/misgendering blogs, no feederism/ED blogs, no unkind people are welcome here.

[cyborg-franky]

Heard you were having bad brain times and wanted some silly fun stuff, i gotchu.

How about some stereotypicallly basic white girl things op characters do?

Some ideas(feel free to add your own): loves pumpkin spice everything, says shit like "totes ma goats", lives for drama filled "real tv" shows, wears a pink tracksuit, watches Mean Girls religiously(the movie title is very literal,you don't need to have seen it), listens to Taylor Swift all the time, loves Twilight, eats a bagel for breakfast everyday, planned their outfit based on a white suburban mom's pinterest board

Just some ideas, hopefully this is fun and I hope you feel better soon💜💜💜

With love,

-Zell

May darling <3 I love this idea and I feel better and sorry this took a second.

I hope no one takes offence, I'm white as hell so like.. yes. [also we are all a little white woman aren't we, deep down there's a Beccy and a Karen lurking]

Marco  He’s the bitch that can’t wait for pumpkin spice to come around. He also showed up to Wano 20 minutes late with Starbucks which is pretty white girl of him. His Sphinx outfit looks like a mom coming back from yoga.

Ace Spends too long looking at TikTok. Daddy issues.

Thatch Drinks wine and writes smut.

Izou Goes and gets his nails did but spends the entire time gossiping about the bitch down the street and her shit haircut.

Law Is a huge twilight fan and spends hours online fighting about whose better looking that one guy or the other one guy. 

Rayleigh All around his home is ‘wine o'clock’ -  ‘everything is better with prosecco’ and has those bowls that say ‘bowl ‘plate’ and so on. ‘Live Laugh Love’

Buggy Would murder someone if they messed up his $80 extensions.

Hawkins I can imagine him telling Kaido he can’t go out and kill people because ‘uh don’t you know Mercury is in retrograde? I just can’t babes’

Boa ‘R U OKAY HUN?’ at every vague sounding Facebook post that's like : ( or ‘ugh’

Nami Is the person who posts : ( vague on facebook. Also, she’s a huge Karen, fight me. She would walk up to God himself and ask to see his manager. 

Thatch, Killer, Sanji Could spend hours watching episode after episode of ‘Real housewives of Dressrosa’ and ‘teen mom Grandline’ 

Zoro, Kid Post gym selfies on insta making sure you can see their protein shakes.

Nami, Vivi, Boa, Rebecca Do ‘Zumba’ and won’t shut the fuck up about it and makes it their entire personality for the three months they attend.

Perona ‘This car is powered by fairy dust!’  ‘princess onboard!’ ‘my other ride is a broom’ bumper stickers.

Whitebeard ‘My children are my world’ and the stickers that are stick figure families along the back of his van. Fighting a salesperson who gets paid minimum wage over 10 cents.

Hawkins, Drake, Izou Won’t leave the house before checking their horoscopes. 

Mihawk INSANELY LONG COMPLICATED COFFEE ORDER and will make you make it again if that milk is full fat.

Shanks Woo girl 

Sabo Sticks gum in someone's hair if they even mildly piss him off. Spends $400 on boots and never wears them. Oh, watches you make his drink like a hawk and before you make his second one 'Um excuse me, I ordered TWO drinks' while your still making it.

Queen, Black Maria At a restaurant ordering dessert ‘Oh I shouldn’t’ ‘Oh no babe, you deserve it’ ‘okay, I’ll be a devil and have a piece of that cheesecake’ BOTH GIGGLE

Doffy, Kaido Pink tracksuit bottoms and small dogs in their handbags. Shades and purses that cost more than your house. Roger Takes one sip of a beer  and acts drunk ‘I’m sooooo wasted guys omg’

Franky, Sanji, Roger, Thatch Crying over movies like  ‘Dirty Dancing’ and wishing they could be the girl and the lead guy is so hot omg.

Corazon "I'll just have ONE glass of wine" and the glass is the side of his head. or runs a bubble bath and drinks three bottles but it's not a problem it's self care.

Tag yourselves, I'm Marco with a dash of Thatch.

[sankttealeaf]

begging and pleading for a some modern rue/gortash 🙏🙏

HERE TO DELIVER THE GOODS!!

they first get in contact because rue comments a death threat under one of his posts and he's instantly captivated by her rancid vibes (sends a very formal dm to her too about it) karlach, gortash's pr manager, has a breakdown over him using his public account for such things (shes overworked and is looking for a new job. please someone hire her)

their first scandal comes hours after they meet for coffee, someone tags them in a post and suddenly everyones wanting to know the mysterious woman grand duke candidate gortash is seeing (rue hops on the trend immediately and takes a picture with him to send to news outlets everywhere)

she emails him a lot and the subject line is always a form of "hot singles in your area"

soooo much flirting via messages. i have a thing written up where theyre talking and rue tells him she'll brb. half an hour later she messages again like "sorry. saw a snake and took a shower lol want to see" and gortash, thinking hes going to see a picture of a snake, agrees.

it is not a snake at all.

rue turns up to his house one evening and doesnt leave for 3 days. (she found his address "online")

her social media page is full of pictures of them. she writes smutty fanfics and pretends she found it online to show him

gortash makes jokes about killing off his political opponents and suddenly they start turning up sick or injured. rue sends cryptic messages about it but slips up one day and sends him a selfie as she stands over a dead body. justgirlythings

as for the actual fic im writing for this, chapter 1 is titled "death threats mean nothing when you're a politician (it's part of the job)" and chapter 2 is "flirting with your interviewer won't guarentee you a job (unless you're being interviewed by enver gortash)" its such a silly idea. i tried to think too hard about it but decided its more suited to just being almost a crack fic. i need them to be stupid together. i need rue to accidentally livestream them sleeping together. i need orin to spam gortash's inbox the moment she finds out that he and rue are together, sending threats to his life