#[insert i lived bitch meme here]

[definitelynotshouting]

Ya boy has successfully proofed a 400 page 94k word novel in exactly two days. my brain may be oozing out of my ears but I Won

[oh-for-fic-sake-library]

A Suitable Alternative

Masterlist

Summary: When the inquisitors are caught assaulting Lord Vaders darling little engineer two things happen. 1. Vader swiflty teaches his underlings a lesson. And 2. The sith lord finally puts his little one in her place. Which unbeknownst to her is beside him.

Warnings: yandere!vader, Suitless!Vader (as in not clinically needed) , possessive!Vader, attempted sexual assault, swearing, canonical violence, threats, coercive & obsessive behaviour, semi forced relationship.

A/N: *insert ben affleck smoking meme here* Like what do i say about this? Incase you didnt already know I love a dark yandere tropes. Powerful Posessive men who will fuck up anyone who touches their darling. So yeah. Backtrack about a week i decided to pop starwars prequel on for background noise then kind of... watched it, then watched Kenobi. Anakin is prety much the definition of a soft obsessive yandere. And vader? Psychotic yandere. And well this is what you get, i genuinely couldnt help it. Enjoy my fuckery while i go yeet myself off a bridge and look for my moral compass. 👋😀

You whined, squirming uncomfortably your torso pressed tightly to the table. Tears blurred your vision as you struggled, the chubby face of your tormenter split into a wide grotesque grin. He was seated infront of you pleased with himself. Chuckling to himself before leaning back as he used the force to hold your frail form bent over the table, leaving you vulnerable to the others in the room.

"Aww dont cry, isnt this what you like? The power? The invisible holding you in position? Im sure your used to this? Being bent over like a little bitch" he teased, the others chuckled. Even the gaurds snickered at you. You hissed shaking your head still desperately fighting the force that held you still. But it was no use you were stuck.

"N-no i told you! Theres nothing; stop it! Please!" You cried out, not above begging the fifth brother for some leniency. You knew that your arrival had put a few noses out of joint. Many who spent their lives groveling at the feet of lord vader envied you. The interest the lord had in you roused jealousy and anger.

It wasnt like you had done anything, the terrifying male just didn't ignore you as he did others, nor did he threaten or scold you. Youd done nothing to earn a scolding. Perhaps that was the problem? Because your dealings with the sith lord were secret, so according to the inquisitors and troops you hadnt done anything deserving of his attention. Little did they know you had simply done your job in the background. You served Lord Vader just like them, followed orders given to you. Rumors were rampant and everyone seemed to believe you were some kind of whore.

They hissed filthy things in the corridors as you passed, subtly pointing to you and making vulgar hand gestures before laughing, all the while staring at you like meat. Many thought you had been privileged enough to see him without his suit and won his favor serving him on your back. All of this talk because of you survived his interest for more then a few weeks.

It wasnt like that at all. As always the truth is much more boring then the tall tales whispered in the corridors. In actual fact you were an engineering apprentice. Your unsure how or why but lord vader had seen your personal schematics for new bionic prostetics, ones youd been designing for your sister who'd had a nasty accident when you were a child. He had been impressed by the design and had commissioned you to make one for him. And so you did. You made a state of the art prostetic and fitted it for him. That was all, youd measured him, made it and had been observed cloesly by the sith as you worked, he seemed weary of trusting you at first. You could understand it, you were makingnhim a new limb. but he soon realised that you would consult him everystep of the way without having to be spied upon. your task came to a very lackluster end, you were summoned each night for a week to install and configure it, making final adjustments to it untill it was perfect. And after that were simply sent on your way with a large sum of credits you didnt know what to do with.

It probably didnt help that since that week of evening visits the sith lord made a point to greet you in the halls when he saw you, sometimes a quick nod, other times stopping to ask about projects or give you new orders, usually to do with small issues onboard his ships.

These small interactions didnt go unnoticed, but before you could see the growing animosity in his closest underlings the sith lord had made a habit of checking up on you once a week. He seemed to treat his visits like a reprieve, for a an hour or so he could forget his responsibilities and investigate your latest projects, share thoughts on upgrades to the fleet or codeing on the ships mainframe. He even toyed with the idea of having you look into weaponry for him. You quickly found that he was quite advanced with engineering and coding he seemed to have an affinity for more then just the force. And honestly it made you relax around him, it was easier to forget who he was when your discussing technical advancements. Youd even go as far to say you developed a friendship with him, allbeit a very insignificant long distance one.

The issues surrounding gossip only became apparent when vader needed an impromptu sensitivity adjustment to his hand, his hydraulics had almost crushed his lightsaber in battle and that could not happen again. So he dropped into your tiny personal chop shop on the dark destroyer unannounced. And he was unimpressed to say the least declareing the space was too cramped for talent such as yours and that you needed a bigger space work. That night youd been moved in to his biggest ship; the executor. And given a captains quaters, roomy with its own wash room and new huge workshop to tinker in.

"Oh no, a lie? I wonder what he does to you when you spout lies?" The fifth brother rose with another cackle, a high pitched wheezing laugh of a weak man. He pressed forward, palms flat on the table before you, scoffing down at you.

"I dont; we dont even! Please let me go! I havent done anything!" You panicked craning your head as much as you could with your neck cramping from pressure behinde it. Tears glazing your eyes but you refused to let them fall. This was your fault, you'd come to the meeting room intent on waiting for lord vader to inform him of a new code youd been asked to develop.

Vader had asked you to investigate a possible track and trace protocol that could be useful to the control room. Youd managed to create something better. Discovering a way to automatically target hackers and implant spyware into the assailants system not only ravaging their communication but also relaying all data to the executors own systems.

In your excitement youd sought out lord vader, forgetting that the only true safe places for you on this ship were your quarters and workshop. And thats when you were unceremoniously dragged into the room and the taunting began.

"Oh, you would have us believe your not whoreing yourself out to him? Honestly its laughable. So pathetic, you think we dont notice. That we dont see his favor of you? Perhaps we can share in his delights-" the words were venom, spat at you with greed and loathing. A sinister promise below them as he began rounding the table in your direction.

"NO! NOOO! STOP LET ME GO!" You screamed trying to shake his hand away as his palm landed on your shoulder skimming your back making your skin crawl. You sobbed trying the thrash as the fifth brothers hand moved over you, following the dip in your back heading south with intent. You struggle, fighting as much as you could as the inquisitors hands roamed you, squeezing, rubbing and pinching making crude comments to the others about what a comfortable ride you must be. All the while you begged for him to stop. Threats of what would happen when vader found out were on the tip of your tongue. But fear of your own retribution should you use your lord in such a way made you bite your tongue.

You felt it before you heard anything, the atmosphere changed. The room grew cold and a sense of anticipation hung in the air as the door behind you opened. Everyone froze as the mechanical breathing of your lord cut through the room leaving no doubt to who had just waled in. It was clear no one had thought this through. You could almost hear their panicked thoughts wondering how they didn't feel him coming? But then again it was lord vader, if he didnt want to be detected he wouldnt be, it was part of his arsenal.

You heard him pause at the door, his feet planted to the floor in what could only be him taking in the sight before him.

You felt a shame youd never experienced before wash over you hearing your lords breaths break through the silence. You stayed pinned down face flaming in mortified defeat as you knew he was staring at you pitifully bent over the table. Your ass though covered by your uniform was still displayed,and in your mind a little too large to feel decent bent over like this. Your tears finally fell as your lord saw first hand how truley weak you were. It was soul crushing to think this may be the moment the sith finally realised how pathetic you were.

You bit your lip, holding your breath for a moment waiting for what ever was to come next, resigning yourself to the fate lord Vader chose. A laugh, taunting? Disappointment? Or maybe lord vader will simply ignore your situation and abandon you, let the fifth brother continue as he pleased.

"What. Is. This?" The words were distorted, almost lost in translation despite being spoken slowly between breaths. You could almost say the voice coded words sounded angry. No one made a move to answer him, probably because you all knew he wasn't asking whats going on, he was asking for an explanation. He wanted to know who and what had instigated such an attack. He wanted to see if anyone would lie. It was. Test, a challenge noone accepted.

You expected to hear a plethora of excuses, stuttering words or apologies. Hell even a ridiculous 'she attacked me' lie. But no. Instead you heard the inquisitors fearful gasps, they crouched and jerked back from their lord. Cowering. Had you not still been held down you too would have buckled under the quick, scalding burst of rage that permeated the air making it thick and painfull to breath. Or perhaps it was just your fearful anxiety that was threatening to suffocate you. You felt the darkness seeping into the room, a rageing tidal wave of fury and disgust, you dread to think what it felt like to the other force sensitve occupants.

The need and rage rolled into one as Vader finally spied what was causing the commotion. He made sure to pluck the force in the room with a vengeful malice, pressing his anger into the threads of the inquisitors own force making them each take a scuttle back in fear.

Vader tolerated many things on his fleet that he probably shouldn't. The occasional celebration, small quantities of alcohol hell he granted sick leave when people clearly faked their illness. He even overlooked some force sensitive stormtroopers, going as far as to mask them with his own force signiture when palpantine decided to visit. He would turn a blind eye to them aslong as they were loyal to him. Yes. He allowed these things to slip past the net so to speak, he never wanted to be as restrictive as the jedi.

But assaulting a young female who served him was not something he would allow.

Especially when its his favourite woman in the entire fleet. A young engineer who had enhanced his bionic hand to the point it no longer caused him pain once attatched.

He had grown fond of his little engineer. You were a marvel to behold, new concepts and technology seemed to just pour from you when you began tinkering or coding, you seemed to do the impossible. It hadnt taken him long to come to the conclusion that you were worth the time and effort. He could give you the means to make great things, you could innovate and modify his own fleet of ships and grant him an edge which they currently lacked.

But in the time he had indulged you, he had become somewhat attached, lines had been blurred. He told himself it was to manipulate you. That he needed to get close to bend you to his will without threats of violence;they would make you nervous and bring about mistakes which he did not want to deal with.

And he also wanted to understand this new odd darkness he felt. It was almost like Anakin and vader combined into this depraved poisonous yet protective longing. He wanted you. All of you, he wanted to crawl inside of your mind and occupy your every thought, to have your heart for himself and be your entire reason for living. He wanted to keep you mind, body and soul, to own you. To never allow anyone to ever see or speak to you. He needed to be your everything.

And most confusing of all? He wanted to protect you. Sheild you from any who would dare harm you. Not out of sentiment, or maker forbid love. But because you were his. You belonged to him, why would he allow anyone to tarnish what is rightfully his? He always belived his protective urges were because you were small. Defenceless and naive, much like padme. There was a quiet reverence to you he had come to appreciate and crave. He coveted your admiration, fed off of it.

He knew he was toeing the line. He was more attached to you then he would like to admit. He was bordering possessive, he didnt like you being far from him, which was the reason for moving you onto his own ship. He'd thought it would be enough to have you on the executor, walking the same halls never being too far from him, he'd made certain your clearance never allowed you to wander into the bowels of the ship. You were contained to a quadrant spanning five levels and six hundred metres squared. Not that you had realised that yet.

But having you here handlt quelled his obsessive need for you, and so he had still been keeping a close eye on you. Shadowing you, checking your movements during the day by tracing your unique access code. And when he had a spare few moments he'd hunt you down and give you random meaningless tasks just so he had a reason to give you orders inperson. Not that you seemed to notice. Or if you did, you didnt mind.

It was your ignorance to his odd behaviour that spurred him on. Excited him even, you were someone who accepted his dominance without question or complaint. Not in a fearful sense either. You didnt cower from him, your life force didnt tremble or try to resist him when his own prodded at you. There was just a calm understanding there, you accepted his might. Even when the power radiating off of him was suffocating, you still sat there obediently, loyally waiting his next command without trying to escape his presence. It was refreshing to not have to pretend, or put on hiers and graces. He could be the rough, demanding and powerfull man he was, without judgment. Which was more he could say for padme. And unlike padme you were far too meak and loyal to ever think of crossing him. You wont abandon him, you wont stab him in the back, you were a suitable alternative to padme, because you already accepted him the way he was.

It pleased him. You pleased him. And you will continue to please him as he sees fit.

Vader hovered by the door for a moment assessing the scene once more commiting it to memory. It was very rare he had to do a double take to actually belive his own eyes, but this was one of those rare occasions. And the fool whod dare touch his engineer was to shell shocked to remove his hands. It would seem he really did have to do everything around here. Oh well.

There was a beat of cruel anticipation, violence echoed silence in the room. And then you felt rather than heard a lightsaber rush across your back. You yelped out in surprise as heat engulfed your spine, uncomfortably hot like your skin was on the cusp of sun burn, yet not actually damaging you. There was a second scream accompanying yours. The fifth brother screeched an agonising blood curdling pained scream. And you felt something hit your back, the weight of the force was lifted instantly. You took a breath and jerked upright so fast you had to hold the table to stop yourself from falling over. You peered to your right only to stumble back a step as you saw what happened. And more importantly what had landed on you.

"Oh;oh god" you covered your mouth seeing the fifth brother panicking on the floor withering in pain holding up his arms to his face unable to belive what he was seeing. Your stomach turned as you saw the violent sight. Two cautorized stumps adorning each arm, a diagonal cut across each. And the hands that had tormented you were twitching on the floor loosing their colour, fading to a deathly blue.

"My lord you? His hands?" You whispered, trembling as you realised those hands had been what fell on to your back. Severed hands! Your chest tightened as your eyes roamed the sight of the whithering man before you. You vaguely heard the sound of lord vaders lightsaber retracting, but didnt react, far to focused on the sight before you.

With a slight yelp and jolt you pivoted as Vader approach you, closing the last few inches. But he did not allow you to move, one gloved hand pressing into your side keeping your back to him. You felt his fingers twitch as he held you stil.

He relished in the feel of finally touching you openly, cursing his suits thick gloves wanting to feel your supple flesh with his own skin. But he also enjoyed the intimidation his suit provided him. It was the only reason he wore it, the fear factor.

Your breath hitched as vaders hand dug into your side firmly easing you back into him. His huge frame shadowing yours, so close his cloak was falling around your own shoulders as his body skimmed yours.

"Hush little one." He ordered lightly. You peered over your shoulder flicking your gaze to him and then back to the floor holding your breath for a moment swallowing down your panic with a firm nod and released a slow breath, edging yourself away from an all out anxiety attack with practiced ease.

"Good girl. Always soo obedient, soo loyal. Youd never defy me would you?" You could hear the grin in his words, the pridful taunting thats prodded the others in a veiled threat. Vader moved his hands cross you, tucking one arm arcross your waist completely aligning your body with his. Making a show of holding you as close to him as possible.

You flushed keeping your eyes on his mask not wanting to be seen as rude. Though it was hard to maintain your gaze with your heart stuttering in your chest. You merely shook your head silently at his question. No, youd never defy him. Never, you looked up to him. So much so you felt it was him who should be emperor, after all it was vader who lead the troops, vader who fought and won the battles. It was vader who people feared and respected. He got his hands dirty and was actually fighting for something. Palpantine just seemed to make decrees and force others to do his bidding.

"Its a shame others dont follow suit. To think my own inquisitors sought to steal from me, right under my nose on my own ship" he continued speaking. Completely ignoring the other inquisitors as they still stood cowering on the far end of the table, making sure to keep their distance and avoid their lords anger. You didnt have time to fully register his words before he was speaking once more, berating his servant's whilst not giving them any of his actual attention both punishing and Insulting them.

"They believed i would allow them to sully you with no consequences. They feel that they are indispensable. Yet you have done more for me then all of them combined" you flushed absentmindedly shaking your head and tried to tuck into yourself and hide your face at the soft praise. You knew it was to rub salt into the wound, to embarrass them. These great force weilding soldiers were less usefull then a silly weak engineer that hadn't even finalised her training.

"I had thought i could trust them with you. That their so called loyalty to me would prevail over their jealousy. It seems i have over estimated them. They are not loyal, but frightened. They have no respect, just fear" vaders words were a harsh taunt, turning sinister and vicious with an air of mocking and dark sarcasm that he was known for throught out the fleet.

"And rightly so." You heard more fearful inhales from the others in the room,but you couldnt bring yourself to acknowledge them. You didnt dare disrespect your lord by disregarding his attention in favor of those who were so far below him.

"M-my lord i would have stopped, i was teasing Ugh-gagh!" Your head snapped up to the fifth brother as he stupidly opened his mouth and tried to defend his actions. You flintched as your lord moved, arm snapping out infront of you and the fith brother gurgled on his own words, choking.

"She is not yours to tease or torment" you watched in a horrified fascination as vaders hand fingers curled slightly. It looked like he was commanding a puppet, tugging invisible strings, choking the fifth brother slowly. Youd admit it was terrifying to behold, youd never seen this before and to be so close? You were conflicted. It was like watching a crash, you knew what was to come, you should look away but you couldnt. Something in you wanted to see it.

"Perhaps you should offer an apology? My little one is merciful. She is one for granting second, third and fourth chances" vader teased, enjoying dangling a bone infront of such an undeserving mutt. A thrill shot up your spine as you realised he was doing this for you baiting the dying man just to let you have a moment of retribution. Though being the cruel man he was vader made sure to tighten his grip. To cut off any sounds this squeeling little pig would try to make. And he did try to plead his case, eyes flicking to you begging for mercy.

You shivered pressing back into vader as the scene continued to unfold. Even when this man was dying you were afraid of him. And yet you weren't afraid of the sith lord commiting the act. Vader had to be provoked, you reasoned to yourself trying to fend off the uncomfortable thoughts trying to arise. After all vader had mentioned in passing about entering minds to gather information. You wonder if he could read your thoughts in real time.

"No? Well then" vaders dealthy teasing took an amused tone. He was enjoying this for a change. Especially when you released a soft half giggle under your breath at his dark sarcasm. It was irronically entertaining as your once powerful assailant made to grab his throat with two stumps. His eyes widened in true panic as he realised there was no way he could escape, he couldnt even claw at the grip tightening around his throat. You vaguely noticed that he was still firmly on the ground, which for some reason made you think it was somehow worse? It was one thing to be choked lifted from the floor, kicking your feet helplessly. But another sadistic torment to be choking on nothing whislt on the ground trying to clutch at your throat with no hands.

Vader hummed in approval at your minute glee, he always sensed a tiny dark spec on your pristine soul. You craved justice, to the point you enjoyed karma. You liked watching the odds get evened out. He even toyed with the possibility of that being why you were so loyal to him. That you looked to him as that balanceing force. The one to even the odds in the galaxy. It filled him with a delicious heat to think deep down you enjoy the way he was punishing your attacker. He felt righteous and godly as you relaxed into his hold watching the life slowly drain from someone who had made you beg and cry for mercy.

Your eyes locked onto the fifth brother as his body finally succumb to lord vader. He collapsed in a heap on the floor beside his hands. You arched back instinctively not wanting to touch the body.

"It is a pity. He was adequate in the force. Useful. But i will not ignore such an insult. Though while we are here let us make this a learning experience" his voice quivered with anticipation, not that his voice coder would give away his excitement.

You gasped, hands flying to the thick leather clad arm wrapped around you,clutching him as he moved you. Spinning around hoisting you off of the ground so he could keep you against him as he turned on the horrified inquisitors. It was when vader began speaking again you flush and willed yourself to dissappear, making yourself seem smaller against him. The others stared at you in a looks of shock, anxiety and disdain.

"This is mine. She belongs to me and me alone. And anyone who looks at her, let alone touches her without my permission will be..." vader explained making sure there was no mistake. He paused with a glance to the corpse before quipping his final amused remark.

"Decommissioned. Am i understood?" The hissed question snapped you back to reality and you began answering, only to catch yourself, covering your mouth with your hands when you realised he wanst actually talking to you. You felt rather then heard him huff a light chuckle against your back, the light humming was followed by a light squeeze against your tummy.

"Yes lord vader" the chorus of affirmation seemed to satisfy him and he placed, you back ont the floor, and took half a step back, yet still hovered closer then was needed.

"Good. If i were you I'd make sure to complete your asigned tasks before my return. Come along little one. We have much to discuss" and with that he turned on his heel and began exiting the room.

"Y-yes my lord" you squeaked quickly following him wanting to escape the inquisitors now hateful gaze.

You kept your head down, eyes fixed on the floor following the dark cape skimming the floor in front of you. You tried not to think of what had just happened. You didnt want to relive the ordeal or try to excuse any of it. You knew you'd overthink everything. Especially the way lord vader had held you so closely. The way he'd defended you so fiercely, how he'd not even just disposed of fifth brother, but mutilated him first with his lightsaber. Which he only ever ignited when truly angry or readying for battle.

Your heart jumped in your chest at that particular thought, if he was angered that meant he cared? Meant that you held some form of worth to him? Your stomach joy rushing through you. Youd admit to holding a fondness for your lord. Your admiration of of him had slowly grown into Something reminiscent of a school girl crush... only a very gaurded and respectful variation of a crush. Afterall he was your lord, a sith and the most unpredictable yet powerfull man in the galaxy. You had to be careful.

"You are unharmed?" The words spooked you as he finaly broke the silence and you looked around startled. So lost in your thoughts you hadnt paid much attention to your suroundings. Not that you needed to, everyone made way for lord vader in the halls, so you didnt need to be too aware when following him.

But had you been paying attention you might not have been so stunned when you realised you were in a huge living quarters. A sprawling expanse of black glistening tiles, black matte walls inlayed with glowing beams of light illuminating an array of practical dark furniture scattered pleasantly across the space. Frosted tinted glass acted as partition walls seperating various areas and a partiality concealed a bed room off to the far side of course the huge bed was also draped in a mix of black and maroon silk and velvet sheets.

The room was dwarfed by a window peaking out into the expanse of space, it stretched across the entire quarters in aligned sections. It reminded you of the one in the pilots control center, only this one was almost floor length. It took you a few moments to realise you may have just been lead into lord vaders private chambers.

"Y-yes my lord, thanks to you. I;" you uttered uncomfortably trying to bite down the slight panic at being brought here. Not that you thought he would kill you, it was just odd. Vader was above all unpredictable.

Glancing forward you frowned and took another slow step forward. He had disappeared, venturing deeper into the sprawling space whilst you appraised the decor. In your anxiety you began turning, trying see where vader had gone. Sensing your trepidation he called out to you, beckoning you to him.

"This way little one" you followed his voice only to pause stunned in to silence as your eyes laid on him. He had stepped away from the main open living area into a half concealed office. His back turned to you. But thats not what made you pause. No, it was when you saw his hands clasp his mask and free it from his head. A mane of wavy hair fell to his neck and he drew a deep breath as if thankfull to be free of the constricting head piece.

Your brain seemed to stutter, stalling as words died on your tongue and your mouth hand open for a moment. You never thought youd be privileged enough to see your lords true visage. It was a fantasy not even you had toyed with. Not even when you had been working on his hand, skimming the skin of his arm delicatly as you directed him to twist this way and that so you could concentrate on the connections.

He kept his back to you, slowly removing his gloves, one hand coming to his face obviously nipping the tip of a finger to remove a glove and then the second heavy leather joined its twin on the desk.

"Im pleased the inquisitors didnt cause any damage. It seems i should have kept a closer eye on you. Your far too delicate to let roam. The others think they are safe, belive me when i tell you they are not. They will pay their penance in time" you shuddered greedily lapping up his honeyed tone. Why was his soft voice more menacing then the deep voice recorder and harsh breaths?

It was unsettling, the way you could have been lulled easily from the gentle yet authoritative tone. His demand for respect was so ingrained into him you couldnt help but listen as he spoke. Though at the threat lacing his words you faltered slightly, you did feel somewhat responsible for the incident.

"It was my fault my lord. I had gone looking for you to deliver the new security codeing. You said once i finished to find you and i should have known not to approach the meeting room when the inquisitors;" you tried to argue, though you were unsure why you felt as if everything was your fault. Afterall you couldnt control the inquisitors, and they didnt exactly deserve your mercy after standing by and letting that wretch almost have his way with you for no other reason then jealousy.

"Do not try to make excuses for their deceite. You are above such foolishness" the order was harsh and swift stopping your explanation in its tracks as you tried to take the blame. The ire in his tone and way he flicked off his cloak violently made you bite your lip remaining silent. You peaked up at him hearing him cross the space.

My god. He was a devil. A frightening handsome devil. His face had softer features then you thought. Beautiful and cherub like. Yet there was a sinister undertone to him, a powerful gaze. Yellow eyes, they were haunting in a way, so unique but only enhanced the dark beauty he possesed.

He paused before you, drawing a deep breath tilting his face and concentrated on you. His yellow gaze penetrated you. You could almost feel him burrowing into you, as if he was searching your soul for something. Trying to unravel you and collect your secrets. What ever he found must have pleased him. His face split into a grin and his hands raised, one cupping either side of your face making you look at him. You didnt flinch, you didnt ever gasp as his cool bionic palm cupped your cheek. All you could do was blink up at him owlishly, unsure what he expected from you. But even through your shock you did take comfort in his happiness, feeling yourself smile back up at him.

"You are indispensable to me, you will be moved here where i can keep a close watch over you." His words were alight with a strange glee. You gasped when he tipped his own head to yours his nose skimming yours. You felt slightly uncomfortable, he seemed off? Not that you claimed to know him, because in all honesty you knew very little. He'd allowed you to uncover small details in your time spent together. But you couldnt help feel he was acting out of character. Your interaction felt foreboding, like there was something just around the corner that he was slowly leading up to. That he had a plan for you that could be something wonderful, or incredibly unsettling.

"From now on you are to be by my side at all times outside of these quarters and you workshop. I trust nothing and no one with you. This incident will not repeat itself because you strayed from me. Am i understood." The order came with its own slight chastisement. A light warning laced in the vaguely possesive words.

"Of course my lord" you didnt hesitate. He grinned, eyes darkening with a pridful victory. It was only in this moment, this final test where he truley revealed himself to you that he had realised his true victory. Your obedience to him was second nature, he'd cultivated it. Made sure his authority over you was absolute. That his dominion over you was indisputable, whether he was in his feared suit or out of it. Youd agree to anything he suggested, and youd do it of your own accord with no need for threats or violence.

He chuckled lightly befor dragging your head down and pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead. The action stole your breath and before you could even wonder over the unprompted affection he had stepped back releasing you completely from his hold and turned motioning for you to take a seat in the communal living area.

"You are not disagreeing. Such a good girl. My good girl. You can see i do not have the patience for such frivolous games today" his giddy words were thrown over his shoulder whilst he rounded one of the sofas and then he sat heavily, releasing a sigh as he took the weight off of his feet. You followed him, somewhat in a daze, growing more confused by the second. But dutifully followed him and sat on the spot he patted next to him. Obeying the unspoken demand to sit as close to him as possible.

"I am pleased that the circulating gossip has not hindered your resolve or frightened you off" he continued the conversation as if it were nothing substantial. Like he hadnt just thrown you for a loop and shook you to your core with unwarranted, yet not unwelcome affecton.

"Yo-You heard those?" You stuttered trying not to falter as you held the conversation, you didnt want to disappoint him now. Especially when he was behaving so unpredictably. Youd seen his face, you were a loose end now, you knew some of his best kept secrets. It was humbling and exciting, but even in your excitement you understood the danger you could have stumbled into.

"Indeed. Though i did not confirm or deny such things, i belived if others thought you were mine it may offer you some form of extra protection when my back was turned. I was mistaken" he shifted plcing an arm around your shoulder and pulled you to him. He didnt seem to want to let you go, literally. He'd never shown this type of affection to you before today, youd never had any inclination that he was one to seek out this kind of touching. But he couldnt seem to help it, and he didnt seem to be stopping anytime soon. You flushed as a tiny voice in the back of your mind could barely contain her shy approval. You certainly didnt mind him holding you.

"My lord i; i didnt. I never told anyone that we were? Involved or or anything. I didnt mention what i was summoned for. It was no ones business. I did deny all rumours- or at least tried;" you tried to explain, fearful that he thought you wer e trying to climb rank useing his authority. You sat up, pulling away from him as you spoke wanting to make eye contact with him so he could see the truth in your eyes. But something engulfed you. A pressure pinning you to his side, firmly encouraging you to lean on his chest and tuck your head below his. You whined realising he was useing the force to position you. Your whimpers were quietened down by him hushingyou, his hand rubbing your arm soothingly. It was when you stopped fighting that the pressure left your body.

"I am well aware you had nothing to do with the gossip. Unfortunately such things happen on board all vessels. There is nothing we can do to quell them. Even if i had wanted to." He hummed, his hand rising from your shoulder to twist a lock of your hair and tuck it behind your ear.

"You look shocked." He stated with a deep chuckle, amused by your stunned silence. But continued to distract himself with your hair, knuckles grazing your neck whilst his fingers twisted the soft locks.

"I, yes, well... did you not want to stop the rumours? i dont understand" you mnaged to whisper quietly, stumbling over your words trying to make atleast one coherent sentence and not look a fool.

"Understand? what is there to understand? I am not blind. You are an attractive young woman. You have a brilliant mind and submissive personality as well as being loyal, true loyaltyis a rare find in the empire. I am not adverse to the idea of keeping you for myself." He uttered casually, treating the topic like something as mundane as the weather. It almost became a monologue, him listing his feelings methodically, speaking them aloud like he'd only just rationalised them.

"Infact i thought i made a compelling argument with the inquisitors. I do hope there is no confusion on your part" your stomach dropped , reality settling like a rock in your chest. You couldnt help feeling there was still more to this. A sinister undertone had crawled into his final words. But you couldnt discern if he ws actually threatening you, or is he was genuinely asking you if he had made himself clear.

"Well i? Yes? No? I; im sorry but i dont completely understand? When you say keep me to yourself? Do you mean as an underling?" Your resolve quivered when he threw his head back and bellowed a laugh, one hand dropping to his stomach as he did so.

"Oh sweet angel, you truly are a naive little thing arent you?" He teased lightly through his amusement shaking his head to rid himself of the remaining laugher threatening to escape him. You shrunk face glowing a bright red, unsure if he'd just complimented or insulted you. He felt your embarrassed pout and glanced down at you tipping your head up to face him smirking down at you with mischief.

"But to answer your question, under or on top. It makes no difference as long as i am your only partner, a will not share, you are mine to fuck and fill." Your jaw dropped. No. What? No he couldnt have meant? Surely not! He chuckled again sending you a devilsh look, soaking up the innocent shock and riseing flush on your face. He enjoyed your reaction to his vulgarity, he noted the way you tremble, your thighs tensing. He was tempted to brush overthem and drawmmore sweet breaths from you, let you taste what was to come. But he also knew he needed to make himself clear first. Youd probably have a heart attack if he didnt allow you time to register your new-found role.

"Speechless? Fear not there will be plenty of time for us to explore such things now that you will reside here along side me" he soothed pressing the two fingers to your chin, closing your mouth which only furthered you embarrassment. And he wasnt finished, it seemed he very much enjoyed making you squirm and continued.

"Rest assured I have no intentions on rushing you little one. Though your new uniform will be here by morning and i will make it known that there is a lady Vader on board. Should anyone be confused i will enlighten them personally" you didnt pay mind to the mention of new uniform, no. Instead the title of lady vader echoed in your head like a mantra, you were so stunned by it you almost missed the blatant threat of violence that followed.

"Wha- wait? You really mean to? You wish to be with me intimately?" Your voice cracked, making you clear your throat whislt trying to collect your thoughts that were running wild. The images of you and him tangled in the huge bed youd spied earlier were almost too much for you to bare. You tensed your legs trying not to think about having such a powerfull man ravage you, how he could possibly use his immense power to his advantage in the bedroom.

"It has been my plan yes. You captured my attention, my intrest. And have not disappointed me like so many others. slowly my feelings have morphed into affection, need. A desire for companionship. Something i have not felt for a very long time. I will not waste this opportunity, we will wed soon enough" with that he had finally revealed his intentions. You drew a deep breath trying to keep the air in your lungs and not squeak pitifully like a cornered mouse. You knew it, you were right, he did infact have a masterplan for you.

At your panicked silence vader grew defensive. His aura thickened and the room seemed to darken and cool as the seconds ticked by. He curled his fingers pinching your chin firmly drawing your attention back to him.

"I decided you will remain by my side. And i warn you now, whether you are inclined to agree with me is irrelevant. The decision was made long ago little one" his words grew icey, eyes sharpening to dreadfully observant daggers. You swallowed, nodding to him feeling a fright you hadnt felt since your first few encounters with the sith.

"I understand my lord. So i will stay here? And shadow you?" You agreed trying tp placate him and calm whatever frustration was building in him. You had no objections. Youd do as he asked gladly, you were just blindsided and surprised. If only you had the courage to admit that and voice your feelings.

Whatever darkness washed over him faded quickly and his face relaxed from an eerily calm anger, to a soft contented smile. Your quick compliance and following curiosity seemed to have quelled whatever darkness had arisen inside of him.

"Yes. We will spend a majority of our time together, either here on my fleet or my home on mustafa." You nodded slowly taking it in. The reality, this was happening. He had planned your life, planned your relationship, and the way he was so self assured in his ideas for your future showed that he had thought this through, played with the idea long enough to work around any issues tht might arise. Youd also made sure not to flinch at the mention of that terrifying planet. It was somewhere you'd never want to visit, but you doubt you'd get a choice in the matter.

"And my work? I mean will i still...after we are? wed?" You inquired wanting to pull the conversation away from mustafa. But also clarify exactly what your lord had instore for you. His face lit up, youd pleased him by insinuating your upcoming nuptials. Quietly accepting the future he had planned.

"I would never impede your personal growth. You are free to keep your workshop. And i will give you tasks to keep you occupied when i am away on business" you closed your eyes in relief. He may have sprung this on you and expect you to obey him without complaint. But atleast he wasnt going to lock you up and let you suffer bordem. Youd have some freedom.

"Thank you my lord, your words mean alot to me. I fear what would happen if i was left with nothing to do" you quickly voiced your appreciation. Still hesitant but compliant, your lord had made up his mind, and you were not going to tempt fate by arguing. You were however going to try and explain yourself. The last thing you wanted was for him to doubt your loyalty and obedience.

"A-and just? For what it is worth I... i am inclined to persue this relationship my lord. I was just shocked earlier, i meant no disrespect. I didnt mean to anger you. I am sorry if i upset you"

"Apology accepted" he hummed dragging you to lie on his chest once more. This time his arms coiling around you protectively. You melted into him. Despite having the beejeezus scared out of you moments ago you couldnt help but give into him. This had been what youd fantasised about hadnt it? Being held by your lord? Having him trust you, showing you affection and being special to him. Although you admit this was much better then your late night guilty pleasures. Not only was he holding you so sweetly, he had trusted you enough to let you see what lies beneath his mask. As ridiculous as it sounded, you couldnt help feeling that you could be happy with him, despite how intimidating he could be.

Still you couldnt help but want to make things right. To reassure him and smooth over any lingering unpleasant thoughts he may have over your silence earlier.

"It just caught me unawares. I admire you and was surprised by your words. I can admit to harbouring a crush on you. Even before today, but i never thought that..." you trailed off slowly conveying your thoughts wordlessly, trying your best to find a solace. A stability in the new situation you found yourelf in. His quick temper had shaken you, youd never had such a misstep with him before. And you didnt want to repeat it.

"Then that just makes for a happy ending doesnt it little one. Come we will eat and then rest. Tomorrow is going to be a busy day" he rose from the sofa taking your hand pulling you along side him gently.

"But in the end it will be worth it for you to watch the colour drain from my inquisitors faces when they see you take your place beside me" he lamented with a twisted grin thinking about the fun he was going to have tormenting those pathetic mutts.

You couldnt help a jolt of excitement race through you at the thought. It would be nice seeing their smug hatred become terror when your new position was anounced. Hell it would be nice to be beside lord vader, even if your future was completely dictated by him. You really would do anything for him, it was a sobering thought, but not unpleasant. How many people can say their fantasies became reality? But then again its said that when the gods truley wish to punish us they make our dreams come true. Only time will tell if this was your fairytale or your punishment.

[derpy-thebdayclown]

insert the i lived bitch meme here (hi guys)

them being siblings has been my favorite headcanon since 2018, and i can explain it a lot more if asked but basically they have a lot of similar features and i love a good polar opposite sibling dynamic! very silly to me:)

i think erin would be embarrassed by nerris (up until maybe the summer social) so tries to pretend that they have no idea who each other are and simply avoids them- considering who her friends are , shes also terrified that nerris would get bullied by the other scouts if they knew, so its also out of sisterly protection. nerris doesnt seem to mind but does get giddy seeing erin around on the rare occasions

i love them a lot . that being said THIS IS NOT A SHIP DO NOT TAG THIS AS A SHIP I WILL FIND YOU !!!! (😊)

good day

[kerubimcrepin]

Episode 47 - Indie

It is cute to see that indie is still friends with all the people he met during his adolescence.

Cough-cough. Unlike certain other people.

His and Kerubim's life stories are in direct opposition. If one of them ever spoke of their childhood, chances are, the other one would be like, "You have no parents? Well MINE was controlling so you have it better, WET-NOSE" or "You had a shit parent? WELL, AT LEAST YOU DIDN'T HAVE HIM DIE IN FRONT OF YOU WHEN YOU WERE 5."

No wonder they hate each other's asses.

Though, it is funny how both of them had fathers who had always acted like no matter what they do, they will never be good enough.

It's a shame we hadn't seen these friends of Lou's during the series. They have nice designs, especially the yellow one.

Not a Jurgen-Crepin food moment, but this might be useful for pinpointing which fruits exist within the setting.

Patafiks is so funny to me, like... Guys there are 5.5 characters in the animated shows who are canonically queer in some way. One of them fucking sucks, one of them dies within the 20 minutes of being introduced, the 0.5 of them is Kerubim Crepin's ambiguous gender dysphoria, the normal two are Simone and Julie, and the last one is a dogboy yandere (who briefly dated("dated") Kerubim Crepin).

We live in a society.

Indie talks about Kerubim the same way I talk about him on this blog. We are so alike...

Insert "this bitch always starting shit" meme here.

Even though Ouginaks and Ecaflips both follow the same god, — albeit his different sides, — this perfectly showcases the difference in ideology that makes them hate one another.

While Ecaflips are all about mysticism, destiny, prophetising, and simply letting the current flow, Ouginaks are all about making their destiny.

Though I will be real, considering the things Ecaflip puts his demigods through, — like the, uh, son leaderboard within his dimension, or his treatment of Kerubim, (and his hatred of women, I guess, since there is no daughter leaderboard?) — as well as the Ecaflip City and its Ecaflip Psychward, I think his two personalities are more alike than we are led to believe.

It's just that the kitty personality has more glitz, and is better at masking being just as sadistic.

This line really puts how long they've known each other into perspective. God.

It also makes me think hard about the tendency of Ankama to not make distinct visual designs for characters aging, — like in Waven. Despite 30 years having passed between season 1 of Wakfu, and the start of Waven, characters like Miranda and Kabrok still look exactly the same.

I had always associated young Kerubim's design with the age range of 19-30 at best, but who's to say he can't, in this episode, be in his 40s-50s? How many years did he and Lou live together for? And how large is the gap of that unaccounted for part of Kerubim's life, the one that he never opens up about, after Lou had left him?

...I think I hauve covid.

Y'know what, I think I will be insane for a minute, and say this:

Joris, Atcham, and Kerubim really are like platonic soulmates. It feels like every single thing in their lives somehow rhymes, — like every single step they took simply brought them close to the inevitable conclusion of being together.

Sure, whatever, just tell me things like "Atcham knew, and worked with Julith, and they had a pretty amicable relationship", "Yeah Kerubim and Indie rescued the Ivory Dofus that would one day lead to Joris's birth, and then would lead to his orphanhood", "Yeah Kerubim has always wanted to be a father, and felt a certain way about kids being orphaned the same way he was", "Yeah Atcham and Kerubim went to the same war where Julith and Jahash fell in love and were probably their seconds-in-command."

Tell me that. Expect me to be normal about it. I promise I won't disappoint you.

Anyway,

I always found it very interesting that, despite becoming the Champion of Bonta, it was not Indie who went to that war, but Kerubim.

Perhaps Indie was long happily retired by that point, — perhaps he veered from adventuring into archaeology, for his museum, — while Kerubim was old, with no friends, and not much to live for anymore.

It probably was a self-destruction thing, in the "Atcham, and The Butcher of Brakmar herself, will be there. I'm so bored, and tired... It will be poetic if I defeat them, or die trying to. Then I'll be a legend. Also, there are a lot of people at wars, maybe one of them will be friendly to me :3" way.

World of Twelve heroes are always doing this shit. 💀 though considering he can't die, this isn't even suicidal ideation. It's ideation-ideation. God.

Despite everything, Kerubim does care about Indie, a lot. Indie seems to have cared for him too, — but, at times, I really do wonder if Kerubim's feelings for him ran much deeper than Indie's.

Every sign of genuine emotion is laughed at, and a genuine "I had always respected you" gets a downright haunting "yeah, and your taxidermied head will look nice in my museum when you die".

That must hurt, doesn't it?

It's funny, how life works out. Just like Kerubim, he ended up raising his kid in a completely opposite way than how he was raised. And then he dies, and his kid gets taken in by Kerubim, — who has already taken in the child of his another enemy.

...The implications of Lilotte's life make me sad. Unlike Joris, she didn't grow up in a hazardous, infested, hoarding environment. Indie was likely not mentally ill to the shits. Yet Joris's worst nightmare, — his father passing away, and him being forced to fend for himself, — actually happened to her, immediately ripping away the normal, maybe even privileged, life she had. And it just compounds the sense of loss she already had for her birth parents.

Unlike Joris, who grew up wondering vaguely about his birth family, it seems like much more of a sore spot, with her attachment to her bell...

(Off topic but, god, it's so Bonta-core, that the adoptive daughter of a previous champion of Bonta, who had a museum and was rich, ended up on the streets like a stray. I hate that city so much, it's unreal.)

She uses some pretty dark humor to cope with that. I mean, she already lost two families. No way in hell she's losing a third one. Which kinda harkens back to Kerubim's own backstory, and his own loss of the entire Crepin family, save for Atcham.

I think it's cute that, just like him, — she becomes a mother at some point in her life. Maybe it's because she looked up to Kerubim, who had a similar life story to hers, and that inspired her. Maybe it's just something she wanted, even without thinking of Kerubim's own orphan to dad pipeline.

But either way, it's like poetry — it rhymes.

[funishment-time]

17! 17! 17!

!!! HELL YEAH !!!

17. List five headcanons for your favorite characters!

the arrival of the Monokubs at a non-despair HPA causes a lot of chaos, as everyone thinks Junko built the kubs to make fun of them specifically. in fact, Junko didn't build the kubs at all, but she lets them "live" because their existence causes everyone despair (including her and her favorite son, Monokuma)

this may be a sin to some, but i actually prefer Miu and Keebo to have a brother-sister relationship, where Miu gets to dote on her Stupid little robot brother and give him Equally Stupid upgrades. (yes, i know there's a sexual element to a lot of how they interact in canon, but i like to think that's before she really knows how to Treat People Normally. it evens out Eventually, although she still asks him from time to time if he wants [INSERT SOMETHING ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING HERE] so he can "get with some bitches or Ouma or whoever the fuck")

speaking of Miu, she still watches Saturday morning cartoons with sugary cereal every morning. if you interrupt her Genius Routine she can't function and blames you for depriving the World of the things she could have made that day

Hajime often discovers memes about 5 years too late and tries to use them to befriend others. it's charming, a bit. he still thinks Rickrolling is funny. this is less charming

Sakura does not participate in social media with one exception: she loves TikToks of animals being silly, cats especially, and bonds with Ryoma and many others over this. it's one of the first inroads she has with people

BONUS: during the main timeline events, it's Hina who observes AI Chiaki and bashfully, carefully, eyes cast down to the floor, asks Makoto if there's any chance they could use the same Technology to bring back their friends, too. "at least...the friends we still have a piece of." but as she watches the NWP she knows it will only cause her more grief: AI Chiaki was not the original Chiaki, and an AI Sakura would be less than a ghost. the true Sakura would not want to dwell on the past...even if the impulse is there. instead, Hina becomes friends with Alter Ego, and understands the importance of a legacy vs cyber-necromancy thru AE's insistence that he is more like Chihiro's son, not Chihiro

[makima-s-most-smile]

Trigun Maximum 8 Part 1

Emotional destruction Vol.2. There is more to come!

How… how has Nightow the style of 80s shoujo manga down to a T? I love it.

I didn’t see this at first, BUT KNIVES IS HOLDING A KNIFE! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

01: Invasion

Of course, the Golden Gate-like-Bridge needs to be destroyed to show that the attack has begun. While the ark looks cool and all, it doesn’t really looks like something that can stay in the air. (really, Knives? Tell me how you plan to let the people on the ark live after you do the genocide. Self Absorbed bastard. This is your ark, for you alone.)

Yes, take even more agency from him.

Having his whole body weight on one point, the connector must hurt so much right now. I am sure it feels like it gets slowly torn out.

Legato could make a fortune by being a sport instructor. Just make me move! I pay you!

I wanna slap him so badly. Seriously. THANKS TO VASH?! He is running around trying to help them as much as he can!

KNIVES! YOU ARE THE REASON THAT YOUR SISTERS ARE ON THIS PLANET AT ALL! TELL ME AGAIN ABOUT YOUR SIN OF ACCIDENTALLY KILLING THE SISTERS THAT WERE ON THE 802 SHIPS. YOU DID NOT KNOW THAT YOUR FUCKING HAIR TURNS DARK WHEN YOU START TO DECAY! THE FIRST LAST RUN YOU SAW WAS LIKE 2 WEEKS AGO! TELL ME HOW MANY SISTERS YOU HAVE SEEN DIE, AGAIN?! You had 150 years to learn about this! 150 years and you failed to do so. Your sisters and their wellbeing aren’t that important to you, buddy. Don’t use them to give yourself validity. And don’t you dare to use Tesla again!

FUCKING FINALLY! I NEED SOMETHING MORE THAN CAPSLOCK TO MAKE MY RAGE ABOUT KNIVES’ DENIAL KNOWN!

Oh, tsundere Legato time. And Knives does not stop him. Does Knives truly not understand that Legato is starting to act not only on his own but against Knives’ stated interests?

At first I thought this was a moment of peace for Wolfwood that boils down to him finding his determination. But in hindsight, this is him knowing he is starting to get crushed between the rock and the hard place. He is waiting to act, he cannot act, even though most gruesome things are happening all around him and he is part of it. (Insert the: "Kitten, I'll be honest. Daddy is about to kill himself"-meme)

Who else thought about Carl? “That’s what forgiveness sounds like. Screaming and then silence.” Knives, that kills people!

*snorts* Yeah, because you have had such a presence in the story til now. Tell me again, how lawful the world is. I'll wait. Yeah, at the bar of that nice granny with the guy that was nearly lynched with his truly innocent bestie.

I forgot about that. I forgot that Wolfwood is used to kill in the cities. I made a pained squeaky noise when I saw them. Someone shut Chapel up and hug Wolfwood!

Wolfwood’s past pulls him down. His training and way of life goes so strongly against his morals. And Chapel knows exactly how to use it to hurt Wolfwood.

But Wolfwood has already changed so much during the story. From the start, while he put his own life first, he never killed with any animosity, the didn't torture people. By following Vash’ (pretty selfdestructive) ruling, he found a way of going forward that fits his morals so much more. He cares about life and especially the lives of others. His responsibilities still stand, that’s why he is still able to kill, but this Wolfwood here is very far from the pupil Chapel had true power over.

Can someone shut this bitch up, please?

Chapel is a manipulator. He knows his “pupils” and knows how to put them down. He doesn’t plan to take Wolfwood in again. He just wants to hurt him. He wants revenge for Wolfwood acting out, for Wolfwood deserting the Eye of Michael's teachings. But this is a struggle for power over Wolfwood, too. Livio is a much better pupil in his eyes, since Chapel seemingly erased his character and wants successfully.

The antithesis of the blank ticket. Your past binds you down. You cannot start anew. Just give in and accept your given place in the world. It is Wolfwood's way of thinking, too. No wonder he hurts so much. Chapel’s teachings dug deep into him.

Wolfwood realises how deeply Chapel has dug his claws into Livio. That’s why he tries to force Chapel to make Livio stop and not Livio himself. But he has no power in this situation here. Chapel has the power since he has power over Livio. And, damn, he uses it to hurt Wolfwood in revenge. Wolfwood is desperately looking for a way out, but he cannot find one.

His sisters want him to stop, too. Not that he listens.

Vash is still hateful of himself for attacking Rem. He never stopped. Even working through his anger at Rem... The anger was replaced with selfhatred and ever since then he has been spiraling.

But the thought about people not changing… They talk about humanity, but isn’t it about Knives, too? I highly doubt that Knives can change. Everyone is able to, but not everyone chooses to do so. Knives cannot reflect upon what he has done, because then he himself and humanity wouldn’t be that different. Both twins are so good in seeing things just as black and white. Damn all of humanity or all of humanity is good, instead of what it truly is, grey. 

OF COURSE HE SAID TESLA! This is so much not about Tesla. Poor girl is just a pawn for Knives, like everyone else. He was such a sensitive kid and now he cannot even realise his own true feelings, much less recognise feelings in other people. He is living a delusion.

It makes Knives an interesting villain, though. I like villains that you can somewhat empathise with. Every last one of us can end like him (without the outright genocide). He is a warning and he is not redeemable, however much I feel for him.

Ugh, yes, Vash is completely right. 

But look at you, Vash. You are a bottle under so much pressure, too. You drinking away your pain does not erase it. You know the source, but you never started to deal with it at all. Why does the stuff you preach never reach you yourself?

But Knives turns away from Vash, again and again. Knives cannot open himself up to Vash. Anger and hate are feelings that are so much better than the vulnerable hurt and fear. Seriously, Vash, how long til it is enough?

“Then we will be even.” No, not really. The people who have hurt Knives are gone. There is no balance to be redone. Knives’ “even” means that the scales are completely destroyed and only he remains. Knives pumps out new victims of violence daily, the only words that are spoken are “Hate creates more hate, violence creates more violence.” Knives has been gone up in his crusade since the Great Fall. Everything after that was him actively searching for and creating more and more reasons to justify him causing the Great Fall and more importantly, killing Rem.

02: Silent Ruin

I shall save our imprisoned sisters! By imprisoning them in MY BODY! A much better idea! Knives does not care about them. Everyone has to agree with him. There is no group, there is no peace, there is only Knives. And Knives can only stop if only Knives remains. If he successfully erases humanity, then he will turn on his sisters, he will turn (more) on Vash. 

I have to agree with one thing from Chapel. He taught Wolfwood really better than to let someone get away… Someone like Chapel… Just saying.

Wolfwood tries his best to protect his home. It is never enough, the odds are so against him. How must that feel? That you give your all, you put yourself between something that evil and children and it is not enough. Remembering Wolfwood’s second nightmare, he killed Chapel to protect the orphanage from Chapel. Maybe Wolfwood found out about the continued usage by Chapel just then.

“So many uses for the good-natured.” I don’t think Wolfwood gets that Chapel means him, too. Wolfwood has been used and abused by him. He is a victim. And he cannot see it. He only sees the things he has done, not that he literally had no choice there. And he lets all the sins fall back to him, making him completely monstrous in his own eyes.

Chapel is so sure that his grip on Livio is complete and I so hope that Wolfwood can prove him wrong. 

There is something to be said about the arm sticking up into the air like the ship from the Great Fall. Even the angle is the same. This is something like the Second Fall. 

Just a reminder that Wolfwood is on the ship, unable to do anything to stop this, waiting and hoping for something to happen so he can act. And it is eating him alive. He is isolated and completely alone. If he rebels now, his life would be not only forfeited, but he would also be unable to help when… if… the time comes. He has to kill in Knives’ name while he waits all his morals and pain aside. The deaths would happen anyway. But that doesn’t change Wolfwood from hating himself for doing so. Vash is at least actively fighting Legato, Wolfwood suffers a different kind of torture. And I am not gonna lie, I'd prefer to be in Vash' position instead of Wolfwood's.

So, like after the Great Fall. How many people died after the initial crash due to hunger, infighting and exposure? Has the population since then grown? Or is it still stagnating?

INSURANCE WOMEN! AHHHHHHHH!

03: Counterattack!!!

I just love Meryl and Milly as intelligence, checking out the situation in the different cities and bringing the info to the people who are able to do something.

I love the proactiveness, I love their care, I love their bravery.

Meryl looks so different. She has lost her spunk, her spark. She looks so much more downtrodden and depressed. Softer and hurt, really.

I love our brat Brad. Like Meryl and Milly, he is a good person who tries to help the way he can. He couldn’t go out, til now, because his expertise was needed, but he is ready to go at the frontlines.

It looks like none of them know what happened to Vash. The last people of the group who have seen him are Meryl and Milly and that was when he was driven out of the city.

FINALLY SHE TELLS SOMEONE! 

And I didn’t get that Meryl knows everything… She saw more than Hoppered, but it looked like everything since Vash was adulty, but maybe Nightow retconned that one.

I have complicated feelings about this. Meryl wanted to get to know Vash and know of his enigmatic past. But narratively, Vash and she didn’t really do anything to get there. It was an accident. Vash didn’t need to change and open up to share this. And… that is an ongoing flaw of him, a flaw that has already cost him so much and we don’t see it changing. Vash not only gets her total empathy without opening up, he now gets it from all of Home (or at least the command). That said, I like that we see it affecting Meryl. She is traumatised, rightfully so. She is working through it either completely alone or only with Milly. For all the empathy Vash deserves for his life, he doesn’t really earn it by connecting to others. Others connect in his stead for him. While Meryl suffers for it alone, Vash profits from it. This is an ongoing pattern, not only with Meryl. With Wolfwood, too. How often did Wolfwood persist and run after Vash to keep on talking, while Vash avoided? And it irks me more and more, the further the volumes go. Vash is a self made martyr, but it is the people that care about him that pay most of the price. Vash needs an Oh-Moment, but I don’t trust that even that would be enough. 

Oh. Vash fought Knives before! Until now it looked like July was his first “real” fight with Knives, but he had altercations before. I would love to know more about those, because from what we saw in July and Jeneora Rock, Vash had so much trouble confronting Knives. Vash’ conflict avoidance, especially with Knives, is such a big part of him. He actively goes against Wolfwood’s advice to check out the erased towns more than once. We know that Vash has a real inner conflict going on about Knives, that he says he wants to kill him but his actions say otherwise. Did no one zoom in on that in the past? Or wasn’t it there then?

Young Luida!

Is he fighting on his own? Maybe, maybe not. But I love that the humans are now empowered enough to go and help Vash and don’t leave it to him. It doesn’t look like they wanted to in the past, either, but Vash left them no choice. Now Vash needs them, even if they don’t know how much.

No, Luida! Don’t join the selfhate club! What counts is your actions and not your thoughts. And you are the least of a coward. You lead a fucking company. Same for you, Meryl! You stood by Vash’ side. Yes, you didn’t completely understand the danger you were in, but may I remind you of Keele? Please don’t let yourself get pulled down by those martyrs. You do enough and are strong enough.

And next to everyone is like that. People don’t want conflict, they don’t want to risk being hurt or worse killed. They don’t want their loved ones to die. So if someone else is able to bear all the responsibility and pain, they feel relief. But that often leads to people like Vash and even more like Wolfwood. People who have to bear the gross alone. But what counts is action. And Meryl is going out into a warzone, trying to help and get info, Luida is leading a resistance.

Being a leader is such a difficult position. On the one hand you are safe from the frontlines, but everyone's life is on your shoulders. Your mistakes add up and your victories are easily forgotten. It is so easy to see leaders as highpaid CEOs that cash in while the workers suffer. Luida is not one of those and I hope she does not stick to that fallacy.

The plants share their memory. Vash has been shown to connect to his sisters via his mind, why wouldn’t his sisters be unable to do it, too? And this is a sign, this is a cry for Knives to stop. His sisters do not want this. They could show him hurtful things, but instead they show him humans appreciating them. What is important for me in that scene is that it is not only a child asking questions, it is a mother teaching the child ageappropriately about the plants, showing her own gratitude to the plant in question and it then gets reflected in the husband, too. The plants care for humans, they want to help. (Little siderant about angels. Angels are so much like machines. They exist for their godgiven purpose and are satisfied with this. They do not wish for more. Dependent plants seem more and more like angels, especially with Nightow saying they see humanity as their god. Independent plants, like humans, have no ingrained purpose and maybe part of the twin’s struggle comes from this. They don’t know their purpose, but they feel like they need one. Nice reflection of the modern human.)

Knives is visibly upset by his sister’s memory. Of course, since it goes against what he preaches. It shakes his resolve. Vash seems shaken, too. I cannot really put his expression there. Well, he is most likely in pain and enduring Legato. But beyond that… who knows.

I am not sure how to interpret these panels. Especially with it ending on Wolfwood smoking, what we have seen before is him enduring and waiting, too. Could it be that the dream of the plants is on par with Vash and Wolfwood, with them enduring and waiting for their time to act to give balance back to humanity and plants? Or is it a foreshadowing that those two will help the plants achieve this balance?

COUNTERATTACK! THE TIME OF WAITING IS OVER! Yes, Knives… you are so completely rational, standing at the front of your battleship, laughing maniacally.

Plant memories. Good ones. Even the researcher with the cross that got halved by Knives is part of it. His sisters see the good in humans, how they try and they appreciate it. Moreso, they actively use these memories on Knives to stop him, to make him listen.

Even here. Brad doesn’t want to attack the innocent plants. But Knives uses them as shield. Brad has to do this to get through to Knives, to have any hope of success. And again, a struggle that is caused by Knives himself that in the end hurts mainly his sisters, while he is unaffected.

And this is what the regular panels of Wolfwood smoking boiled down to. He waited for a time to act. 

It looks creepy and quiet, like a predator inching in on his prey, looming over it in a real display of power difference. An omen of death and judgement. But Wolfwood also looks like a broken man, a dead man walking at the same time. Like I said, Wolfwood has been through his own torture for seven months and I truly believe that it has left massive scars in him.

[bluiex]

Bluie!! Have you returned to the HC fandom? /lh

I NEVER LEFT BITCH/j/j/j/j/j [insert that i lived bitch meme here]

i just broadened my horizons and dont really seek out ship shit anymore

[neuroticboyfriend]

im alive. i spent 2 straight hours vomitting last night and by the end of it i was crying for my mother. it was so bad, part of me actually wanted to go back to the psych ward if it meant i'd survive (clearly not enough of me wanted that tho, or else i'd have called 911). i dont think ive wanted to die so bad ever since i had full intention of falling asleep and never waking up in december 2016.

alcohol/pill poisoning hasnt got me yet. back to sleepytime. i hope.

insert i lived bitch meme here

you are stronger than you know and loved more than you believe

[borathae]

chapter 15

Can’t you like it for me?” he says with big puppy eyes.

You look away.

“You’re being emotionally manipulative here.” shut up girl im loving u too much i cant

“You are playing with fire here, Bunny. Try not to burn yourself”, you grumble.

He chuckles and pecks your cheek.

“I like the burn”, he rasps against the shell of your ear, turning to the front afterwards.

SHUT UP IM CANT TAKE IT. try not to lose your shit challenge- mission failed successfully

He treated you so goddamn fucking well that sometimes you still felt the urge to punch him in the face and run away jk in the corner, i'll take that as a compliment

Lately the latter have become more and more. YAY

“Hey kiddo. How are you doing?” he says in a surprisingly deep voice for such a small frame. me with felix and taehyung

“for half a million bucks I expect to have the painter constantly working on it in a metal cage in the middle of my living room or something.” - ........ - a few bystanders had heard you and were now looking at you with weird eyes. SHUT UP THATS SOO ME except my voice would be low and nobody would hear but could be loud too cuz universe makes it louder at times when u dont want anyone to hear shit

although he was stressed and exhausted he never once smelled of alcohol. AHHHH IM SO PROUD OF HIM *gives a big ass hug and a smooch

WHY DOES NERO'S SHOULDERS LOOK FAMILIAR TO HER AND WHY DOES SHE LOOK FAMILIAR TO HIM AHHH STOP I HATE IT THIS CHAPTER IS A ROLLERCOASTER

again a fluffy moment after the tense thank you, her threatening to buy green and purple pillows PLZ that sounds like me trying to threaten my parents by telling them im gonna marry a cat crazy dude

“I’m not asking for it. I am very much anti punishment uwu i love this stupid noodle

He swallows heavily, “a-are we going to make out now?” he asks, grasping for your hips. he is such a cute and horny noodle pls and no u are about to cringe for the rest of your office time

FUCK GET YOURSELF A MAN WHO CAN FIGHT FOR YOU IMMEDIATELY

“don’t say that what the hell my cock twitched.”

“I am not going to apologize because I am way too turned on to care.”

He looks from side to side with the tip of his nose rosy.

“What’s with the sudden horniness oh my god?”

“It’s just that I never really saw you work before and it’s kinda doing things to me.” SAME HERE IM FEELING IM WATCHING SOME HOT CEO FROM KDRAMA BUT EVEN BETTER AAAAH

It makes his ass cheeks tense up and forces a quiet whimper from between his lips. SHUT UP SHUT UP HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO MOVE ON FROM THIS MOVE ON WITH MY DAILY LIFE????? VANESSA HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LIVE LAUGH LOVE IN THESE SITAUTIONS ??

I REPEAT HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LIVE LAUGH LOVE IN THESE SITUATIONS??? JIWOO SOUNDS SIERIOUS OH SHIT NOW SHE KNOWS AAAH

WHY IS SHE CONNECTING THE DOTS SOMETIMES CHARACTERS SHOULD BE DUMB PLEASEEEE also why is there a group of people surrounding kook??? 👀

the whole thing was soo tense i sweated through my shirt now im a stinky kid -_- BUT WE LOVED IT the emotions was captured soo well and he was supportive yet very unsupportive if your brain's going haywire with an anxiety/panic attack

Twirling him threw him straight into subspace. *insert meme i hope i dont fall, her: twirls him kook : oh no mommy

the mom is sweet AND I CANT STAND THE DAD UGHHH

i prayed for her to not go to the mirror AND SHE DID NOO its really the worst thing to do during a panic attack :(

that was soo scary even i felt the uncontrollable demons while reading and thanks it ended on a good note and it was cute.

anyways i wish her a great day next morning(tho the story has ended) cuz them muscles be hurting like a bitch oof

Me reading through all your reactions:

hahahahha I love how you went on an emotional rollercoaster with this chapter jfdjsf also you quoting so many parts is my weakness hehehe thank you so much for doing that

BROORORORO THE TWIRLING PART WAS THE ONE OF THE FIRST TIMES I WENT "oh fuck i have a mommy kink" LIKE IDK IF YOU GUYS KNOW BUT AAOL WAS MY MOMMY KINK AWAKENING FADSFAHH

[forabeatofadrum]

The first El WooWoo of the year! And as the banner says, I’m still reading instead of writing. So here we go. Buckle up, Klainers and ... Snovians (???? is there a name for Snowbaz shippers? This is just Simon. Snowbazzians?) (What would you call Baz fans? Bazzies?).

I am really enjoying these fic rec posts, more than I thought. It also motivates me to read more, which is a win-win. I do have some ideas for Ljubim te again, so I think I’ll start writing them soon. But maybe I will make a separate post for fics, aside from Wip Wednesday and Six Sentence Sunday? Fic Rec Friday?

ANYWAY, buckle up, it’s a long post, so the entire rec + tags will be under cut today!

Some non-fic recs first. Some? One, actually. I am rereading my Kickstarter books for Check, Please! in preparation for the delivery of the Year 4 Kickstarter. I... uh... asked the shipping costs for that campaign as a Christmas gift. But God yeah, I love this webcomic so much. Time to get back to the SMH (Samwell Meme’s Hockey Team).

Up to the fics!

@martsonmars wrote a fic about “consensual biting” between 6 years old: Love Bite. It’s adorable. I love how silly kids can be. And I am a bitch for fics where Lucy lives 😭!

I am catching up on The Rise and Fall of Simon Snow by @confused-bi-queer. I last read chapter 5, and [Jason Mendoza voice] oh Simon and Baz, we’re really in it now. I am upsetti spaghetti.

I am still riding the angst train right into Is It Over Yet? by @jayne89. God I really wish Carmen was actually this good, instead of a plot device for Rachel’s.... uhm... questionable storylines. Really excited for more of this verse.

God, I am really going through it, huh? @thnxforknowingme wrote a 2022 fic in review where she mentioned True Colors, a character study of Quinn between season 2 and 3, and I like the premise. I really enjoyed it. Damn, skank!Quinn had so much potential, but RIB just had to do the wack baby storyline.

This isn’t Jenna’s only fic that I have read. I finally, finally read Miles To Go, and I know a fic this wonderful should have a long and coherent comment, but I am just speechless. So utterly speechless. I started it when it was originally posted, but I had just lost my grandmother and yeah it was the wrong time. Now, we got the message that it’s time for my uncle to collect her ashes. Weird way to go back to a fic, but that’s what happened, and this fic tugged at my heartstrings. I definitely recommend it to everyone.

Also, more Jenna stuff, but insert the Chris Fleming meme here. Was no one ever going to tell me that Jenna has written Hades fic, or was I just supposed to find out by browsing through her AO3 by myself? Aíma.... YOOOO. The relation between Zaggie and blood? Jenna, your mind!

More sad shit? More sad shit! @wellbelesbian really made me say FUCK THE MAGE with the latest chapter of blow on the tinder. Guys, this is such a good fic. Alex, I am so glad you’re continuing it!

Okay, okay, whooo, time out with the angst. @redheadgleek‘s Pierce My Soul is a fluffy gem and I am a bitch for costume crew!Kurt. Although he got promoted here and he designed the costumes, including Blaine’s. There are so many great gems in this fic, but I lost it at Brad Ellis being the piano man. And when the fic mirrored dialogue from the show.... my heart!

I definitely boarded the fluff train now. I saw @letraspal‘s art for @skeedelvee‘s Drunken Kisses. I am all 🥺🥺🥺🥺 about this fic. Simon “He Is Plotting” Snow is amazing. Mix it with Baz “Gay Yearning” Pitch and voila!

@facewithoutheart delves into Simon’s sad childhood, but in a fluffy way, in What I Wouldn’t Give. Simon gets his first plushie and we all cry. I am such a bitch for this concept and Christina helpfully linked to another one, namely to @lifewithoutmotivation​‘s Flamey. I am just overwhelmed on Simon’s behalf! This guy deserves all the gifts and birthday parties! (Also, congrats on the new URL!)

And we’re going to end this rec post with more holiday cheers from the holiday queers (really, did anyone watch The New Normal?) with @1908jmd​‘s Klaine Advent 2022 - With their favourite people. Jen did a true drabble challenge and all the snippets are about the people in Kurt and Blaine’s lives and look I just got very emo over it.

If you’ve already been tagged in a rec, consider that a tag for WIP Wednesday (or Six Sentence Sunday). Also tagging @quizasvivamos @crissmastrees-and-candyklaines @coffeegleek @esperantoauthor @otherworldsivelivedin @caramelcoffeeaddict @sillyunicorn @bazzybelle @dragoneggos @raenestee @tectonicduck @nightimedreamersworld @urban-sith @thnxforknowingme @captain-aralias @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @takitalks @justgleekout @cerriddwenluna @tea-brigade @ivelovedhimthroughworse @moodandmist @whogaveyoupermission @bookish-bogwitch @aroace-genderfluid-sheep @ionlydrinkhotwater @special-bc-ur-part-of-it @larkral @chen-chen-chen-again-chen​ @cutestkilla​ @artsyunderstudy​  

[thaliasthunder]

grecia reading the secret history by donna tartt 🖼

here u have me FINALLY being able to read this book after weeks of searching for it

prologue + chap 1-2:

they fucking killed someone 💀

MA'AM TARTT THIS PROSE??????????

oh our main boi is named richard papen okay okay nice to meet u young man

so, the greek class huh?

damn the dark academia vibez here are IMMACULATED 🗝🖼🎩

I am nothing in my soul if not obsessive. -> PEOPLE DIED

did this mf really say come to bed w me,,,,, IN LATIN ?????

henry is such a emotionless narcisistic dick................i love him

professor julian marrow i love u

henry explaining how they'd take down hampden in extreme detail........ okay that's suspicious..... that's weird 👁

Francis maybe? He and she were fairly chummy, but Francis didn't look like the sort who would be too interested in girls. -> did i just read this rig- INSERTE MEME DE "LO SUPONIA 🏳️‍🌈"

.................woah

TOO MUCH TO THINK ABOUT

And the boy twin, he starts screaming at me. Like he really wants to kill me, you know? And that Henry just standing there, but to me he was scarier than the other one. -> why am i??? fascinated by this...........????

"See? Knew he'd come. Oh, hello. Boy am I glad to see" "Where's the check," said Henry, in a toneless and deadly voice. -> LMFAO

Once he was inside, Henry turned to me. 'I'm very sorry,' he said -> MY BABY BOY DONT APOLOGYZE ITS NOT UR FAULT

oh francis' has a house in the country and they all spent time in it this such a pleasant image 😭

HENRY DIDNT BELIEVE WE'VE GONE TO THE MOON IM FUCJING CRYINXG

Live forever.

(...) but for sedentary people they had an odd excess of bruises and small wounds -> okay thats suspicious.... thats weird

He smiled at her. There was a slight chip in one of his front teeth I'd never noticed before; it gave his smile a very engaging quality. 'You're light as a feather,' he said. -> SHUT UPPP 😭😭😭

bitch what the fuck is "Good girl. Look at you, you didn't even cry" and "she was brave" ???? U better stop before i fall in love w yall

i have no self control so i already made a playlist and may i tell u Sober II Melodrama by lorde and Heathens by 21pilots are the most tsh song i've heard u'r welcome

[slothgiirl]

hard to explain 5

timothée chalamet social media au. no use of y/n

prev /// next

liked by ameliababy and 421 others

@pinksidekick sometimes going into the office is gr8

view comments

harpyhagnyc: authenticating 1000 year old statues for the win

--> ameliababy: shows what u know 🤡 its older

--> harpyhagnyc: 😭 gonna get my degree revoked

--> pinksidekick: rlly feeling like i should have an honorary history degree by now

--> harpyhagnyc: not until u kno the pain of finding primary documents but theyre not translated

tchalamet: thats cool as fuck

--> pinksidekick: fulfilling the childhood urge to touch the artifacts with🤓 proper ppe ofc

liked by zendaya, austinbutler and 3,897,274 others

@ tchalamet

view comments

pinksidekick: passed 3 starbucks lmao

--> tchalamet: got to support local coffee shops

pauline.chalamet: ❤️

antonofff: rmbr the oatly craze of 2018 !

tchalametupdates: screaming crying throwing up

mstimmychalamet: of all the girls in nyc 🤮 i hate it here

--> timmychalametfanpage: the vibes r off. it cannot b a coincidence shes friends w an influencer #famewhore

timmystan1: not even tagged but we know timmy u aint slick !!!

--> nadiaharris_: do u kno who this is?

--> sanriohoe: they cute

timotheeeeee_c: so glad hes posting again

liked by allymarker, noturzara, tchalamet and 349 others

@ pinksidekick: the highs and lows of thrifting

view comments

allymarker: feel like ive seen that exact mirror on the curb

--> pinksidekick: oh for SURE

noturzara: so many good finds but some jacket up pricing

--> pinksidekick: right! how u gonna sell something from forever21 for $15

--> jose24gonzales: the gentrification of thrifting

--> noturzara: ⚰️

timotheebisous: post timothée

--> timmychalametfanpage: shes so mid idont get it

--> timmystan1: are u for real? shes pretty mb not hollywood beautiful but no way shes mid

--> timmychalametfanpage: shes just so average

--> timmystan1: just goes to show timothees not shallow like im not surprised hes always so thoughtful in interviews

liked by pinksidekick, allymarker and 174 others

@harpyhagnyc two bitches done updating the catalogue for the month 🍾

view comments

pinksidekick: 💀

noturzara: matrix rejects

--> harpyhagnyc: lmao unplanned too

--> pinksidekick: insert spiderman meme 😮

allymarker: dinner at luciens🤤 to celebrate

--> harpyhagnyc: lets do it!

liked by harpyhagnyc, noturzara and 312 others

@jose24gonzales: the face u make when someone tells u they bought a house while ur still paying off ur loans

view comments

pinksidekick: in this eCoNNoMy?

-->jose24gonzales: good for u 😬

--> pinksidekick: but fr who can afford BUYING a house in nyc???

--> jose24gonzales: 🤯 I KNOW

noturzara: my student loans looking at me 👀

harpyhagnyc: ill settle for a rent controlled apt

--> jose24gonzales 🦄

liked by pauline.chalamet, allymarker and 5,782 others

@ pinksidekick: feat my ugly ass food pics

view comments

allymarker: u need those clip on ring lights

--> ameliababy: theyre gamechangers

pauline.chalamet: nostalgic for tapas

--> pinksidekick: southern spain 💖 w their free tapas when u get a drink

--> pauline.chalamet: it hits different then 5€ tapas in madrid

--> tchalametupdates: 👀👀👀👀

misstimmychalamet: shes really living our wattpad dreams😭😭😭

--> timmyno1stan: 😭😭😭

evelyn.wang: hes so 🥺

--> timmystan1: ❤️hes glowing❤️

[existentially-yibo]

Happy Birthday rabbitcrimes!

In honor of my sweet roommate dedicating their latest fic to me I am memorializing the horrible platonic wangxian fic I wrote about us based on a dream I had about our lives together/our jobs -- they are Lan Wangji and I am Wei Wuxian in this fic, and also unfortunately in like everything that we do. I wrote this in like one hour and it is indeed supposed to be bad -- I swear I can write better than this. This fic was a part of a 24 page zine about us and how we are Platonic Wangxian. I had to modify the format of it to get it to post on tumblr so it somehow looks even MORE stupid, but yeah lol here she is. Happy belated Birthday @rabbitcrimes sorry for putting this on the internet 🐰🤡

                       PLATONIC WANGXIAN MODERN AU:

                            The One Thousand Dollar Day

Most days, Wei Wuxian wakes up later than Lan Wangji — unless he just hasn’t gone to sleep yet — particularly on days when they both work. These are objectively the worst days. Not only for the audacity that both of them have to work, but also because their work schedules overlap so that on these days, they inevitably miss each other. Lan Wangji leaves before Wei Wuxian wakes, Wei Wuxian leaves before Lan Wangji returns, Wei Wuxian finally returns after Lan Wangji has fallen asleep. It’s horrible. 

They may live together and are in constant communication both via their individual messages, messaging in the 4+ group chats they are both in, and the endless stream of pornographic content they share with each other on various media platforms; AND YET, when they  don’t see each other for 24 hours, it IS a tragedy akin to the fall of Lotus Pier. Wei Wuxian, often stuck in baby-girl mode is very clingy, and will send work selfies to ensure that Lan Wangji doesn’t forget what he looks like, and that he is a snacc.

On this, the day our story takes place, the day has thus far… sucked. Bitches in the bookstore are really trying Lan Wangji’s patience, which is un-fortchy not an uncommon occurrence. Lan Wangji, perfect boy that he is, is responsible for every single inch of that bookstore, including physically holding up the wall beams in his big strong hands so that the ceiling stays up while the silly little patrons walk around and talk about how they all go to art school. Lan Wangji has also read every book that has ever been written, and  still just smiles and nods when people ask him things like if he’s heard of the greatest book ever written: “Infinite Jest.”

Things are even worse for Wei Wuxian, as he has just rolled over in bed like a beached seal and remembered that he, a good person, ALSO has to go to work. The fact that they live in a four person household and only they go to work is honestly insane . And yet, EVERYDAY (insert quote about everyday meaning everyday) BOTH Toast and Juno stay home making no money and committing crimes. Double guilty!!

Alas, nothing to be done. Wei Wuxian, still in bed, finishes the fic he fell asleep reading last night, sending Lan Wangji screen shots of the parts that make him wants to pull his teeth out with his bare hands, and then gets up to feed his screaming son.

The two of them fall into their daily routine — Lan Wangji at the bookstore, Wei Wuxian prepping for a night at the club — all the while messaging back and forth. It’s comfortable, comforting, the easy stream of thoughts, jokes, and little updates they haven’t yet told each other. Though they are not snugglin’ in one of their beds, or screaming in their living room, they are together in the homey space they’ve made between their phones. Wei Wuxian pauses midway through putting in his extensions to smile at a message and respond to the very correct take that Lan Wangji has sent him about their blorbos, tagging on one of his overly used memes, and then goes back to his hair. His days are easier when they’re sprinkled with Lan Wangji like this. He takes a moment to collect himself and not go little bitch mode about how he has found a family and made a home.

By 4:00 P.M. Wei Wuxian has complained at least twelve times about going to work, every time Lan Wangji patiently and sincerely telling him that it is indeed not fair, cruel and unusual, frankly insane. He walks to the train blasting UNIQ and for the umpteenth time texts Lan Wangji “this song is so bad,” and then, “it does kinda bang tho.”

At work, he flirts with men to scam them out of money, living out the plot to started from the bottom / now I’m rich, except instead of murder it is acquisition of dollars (he is never sure if he is disappointed by the money over murder outcome). Lan Wangji finally gets home to their horrible children. On breaks, Wei Wuxian skips up to the locker room and checks his messages, there are memes and videos in a few of their shared group chats, and a photo sent by Lan Wangji of Juno curled up like a little angel on his bed. Wei Wuxian smiles, and hears himself getting called for stage. He heart reacts to the Juno pic and asks Lan Wangji how the rest of his day went.

The rest of the night goes by fast and busy, and Wei Wuxian doesn’t have time to check his phone. He twirls his hair and pretends to be interested when men tell him about bitcoin, or that they’re “not like other guys” because they “like to travel,” all the while thinking about gay porn.

On his way home, he reads a very pleased message from Lan Wangji that the store had a thousand dollar day, despite the season. Wei Wuxian beams for him. It’s 4:30 A.M. when he gets home and goes through his nightly routine: texting Lan Wangji as he’s coming in so he doesn’t worry, quietly closing his door to not wake him while he takes his make up off and makes ramen, then falls asleep as the sun comes up.

Later, Wei Wuxian wakes to the sound of the electric kettle. He picks up his purple felt Crown Royal bag and counts his cash from last night to the familiar sounds of Lan Wangji making tea in the kitchen, gently talking to Juno about getting her breakfast ready. Wei Wuxian’s face breaks out into a huge smile as he counts over a thousand dollars. Unable to contain his glee he enters into the kitchen, giving Lan Wangji a devilish look, which takes him by surprise and he laughs. Wei Wuxian loves walking into a room and making Lan Wangji laugh with just a face that makes mischief music play in their heads.

They fist bump over their shared thousand dollar days, and Wei Wuxian giddily brings out the cash so that he can show Lan Wangji the thick stack of hundreds and twenties. It’s Monday and they both have the day off. They’ll spend it reading quietly, or writing loudly, in the same room or separate rooms. It’s easy. Many things aren’t, but these days are.

“Let’s order Gorilla Sushi for dinner,” one of them thinks, as the other one says it out loud at the same time.

THE END!! 

[butmakeitgayblog]

Hi there! Hope all is well 🤗

Yeah sorry, it's just been a week from hell. Had a weird medical thing and a hospital trip 🥴 but *insert I lived bitch meme* I'm ok now just been tired and quiet on here. But I'm back

[rekant-2]

new "brutalist" theme that makes it feel like im shouting at you. can't figure out how to make the follow button appear but i don't really care because i don't need new followers anyway

new chars list is here. important additions include:

drew: slice of cosmic horror. goes to support group. lives in the woods and hunts game. carries a vial of dirt in her pocket. shoots guns at the sky, probably. australian ex-pat (this is NOT a self insert). elizabeth debicki.

ruth: cranky old bitch (tolerates women. if you're a man in her general vicinity she'll stand on her porch and throw eggs at your car). one half of a mermaid entertainment duo that splintered, crumbled, crashed and burned in her youth. solo career never took off. perpetually bitter. hard around the edges to combat the humiliation of her solo gig and the miserable, miserable reality that followed. closeted lesbian.

koji & his (our) daughter akira from jw4. they run a hotel. i like them. you have to plot with them if you want to write them because koji isn't leaving japan.

send me a meme for somethin' zippy and voicetesty

[saltsprite]

ALL THE FANFIC ASK MEMES and go in descending order from most recent works with [insert fic]

i dont know why i thought you wouldnt do this to me

@steine-druff & @ckerouac​ yall buckle up too here we go

(from questions for fic writers)

1. What fic of yours would you recommend to someone who had never read any of your work? (In other words, what do you think is the best introduction to your fics?) tame! it’s short, very sweet, kinda domestic, easy peasy

2. Go to your AO3 “Works” page, to the sidebar with all the filters, and click the drop-down arrow for “Additional Tags.” What are your top 3-5 most used tags? Do you think they accurately represent your writing habits? in this order, 1-5: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergent; Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot; Oral Sex; Alternate Universe - Modern Setting; Light Angst. .........yeah it me LOL

3. What are some tropes or details that you think are very characteristic of your fics? well apparently my writing is very Horny lmao but i try to switch it up regularly and explore new things, so i don’t know that i can pin down just one thing! if i really had to, i try to write like a good film that holds the camera on its actors to just let their scenes breathe and their actors act

4. What detail in [tame] are you really proud of? cobb calling grogu ‘sweet pea’ hehe <3

5. What do you wish someone would ask you about [secretary]? Answer it now! Q: is Din a little tsundere there? A: yes >;3

6. What’s one fact about the universe of [pearls before beskar] that you didn’t get a chance to mention in the fic itself? pearls are a bitch to clean ;3

7. Any worldbuilding you’re particularly proud of? i made two OCs to live in Mos Pelgo/Freetown, both completely accidentally named after towns in Texas -- a young woman named Odessa, and a big burly dude (gender-neutral) with a huge beard named Sweetwater

8. What song would make a great fic (to either write or read)? i can’t really think of any! i also don’t usually adapt things 1:1 from anything, so even when i do take inspiration from a song it’s more about the general vibe or expanding on an idea in the lyrics 

9. How do you find new fic to read? i... need to get better at it ;lkdfj;ald

10. How do you decide what to write? first and foremost it has to Vibe hard enough that i can spin off from that initial kernel of an idea

11. Are you partial to a certain character/pairing or are you more equal-opportunity? If you are partial to any character/pairing, why do you think that is? i spend most of my time in DinCobb, but i am deeply fond of BobaCobb. like obviously DinCobb scratches a deep cowboy itch, but with BobaCobb, there’s just such an interesting dynamic of them both having (essentialy) worn Jango’s soul. it’s a profoundly tight thread that binds them together, reinforced by their mutual friendships with Din, that i just cannot get enough of

12. Are there any tropes you used to dislike but have grown on you? “tropes”, more like “kinks” LMAO -- which is to say, that’s for me to know and you to try and figure out while you read my smut

13. Are there any tropes you used to like but don’t anymore? really just depends on who writes it! 

14. Are there any tropes you would only read if written by a trusted friend or writer? YES. anything involving a power dynamic that’s kinda icky irl (like doctor/patient). also f/f version of a m/m ship. also BobaFen. 

15. What’s your favorite AU that you’ve written? that same old song and dance -- the one where Cobb and Din are both young bounty hunters hired on the same job and it goes tits-up when Cobb is accidentally drugged, and they fuck after they save each other and the drugs wear off; and then meet again in canon

16. What’s an AU you would love to read (or have read and loved)? im gonna fucken write a DinCobb Evangelion someday fuckin WATCH ME

17. What highly specific AU do you want to read or write even though you might be the only person to appreciate it? oh i already wrote that LOLLLLL my precious DinCobb Utena AU

18. If you wrote a sequel to [rabbit heart], what would it involve? take that predator trope and suplex it to break its neck by having wolf!Din become Cobb’s homemaker, so that jackalope!Cobb can come home to a happy pup of a man

19. If you wrote a spin-off of [sugar pie, honey bun(ny)], what would it involve? Fennec Shand with her fingers in her ears plotting out how much dick and pussy she’ll need to forget about this

20. If you wrote a prequel to [sweet like strawberry], what would it involve? oooohhh their first meeting, i think

21. If you wrote a “missing scene” in [once bitten, twice shy], what would it be? ch2, Raylan gets his hat back smelling like Ezra and only once he’s home and the door is locked he’s shoving his nose into the sweatband to huff Ezra’s smell and try not to jerk off about it (and fail)

22. Who is your favorite character in [four times lucky] and why? Boba Fett LMAO cheeky bastard <3

23. What’s a trope, AU, or concept you’ve never written, but would like to? lovers to enemies >:]

24. Are there any easter eggs in [take my revolution], and if so, what are they? as im typing out “ah jeez i don’t even use easter eggs” i am reminded that i am a stinky liar, i absolutely put Kaoru Miki and Himemiya Anthy in my Utena AU fic. i was gonna have a scene where Utena herself appears but i could never figure out how to do it gracefully so i gave up on that (because the trick to AUs is actually to change the AU to fit the characters, not to change the characters to fit the AU, so if i can’t do it gracefully then it’s a sign that the idea is shit)

25. What other websites or resources do you use most often when you write? Wookieepedia, thesaurus

26. Would you rather write a fic that had no dialogue or one that was only dialogue? oh fuck these are both good challenges,,,,,,, at this point i’d say “fic that’s only dialogue” for the challenge 

27. How long did it take to write [the ground you walk on]? Describe the process. aka the one with the Boot Stuff. process was to 1) watch Cobb Vanth’s glorious return in TBOBF 2) get horny as fuck 3) whip this out in like a day in a fervent fugue state

28. Does anyone read your fics before you post them? If so, who? hahahahaha i never beta :’)

29. What songs would be (or are) on a playlist for [shrouded]? Explain your choices if you want! beautiful stranger, by halsey; want to be missed, by hayley kiyoko. idk why but the sapphics tap into a level of gay yearning that nears divinity for me

30. Have you ever written something that was out of your comfort zone? If so, what was it, and how did it affect your approach to writing fic thereafter? ohhh definitely my 34k DinCobb Utena AU, so far. it taught me that outlines are what drive your story, if you don’t have an outline to fish-bone off of you’re gonna have a bad time

31. What’s your ideal fic length to write? 4k-ish? max

32. What’s your ideal fic length to read? tbh my upper limit is about 30k these days. not everything needs to be 100k!

33. If you write chaptered fics, what’s your ideal chapter length to write? Is it different from your ideal chapter length to read? this is so subjective based on the overall length of story haha but i usually only do oneshots 

34. What aspects of your writing are inspired by/taken from your real life? any cats named Rusty, parental issues, anything a character does out of Responsibility 

35. What aspects of your writing are completely unlike your real life? first of all they’re fictional space DILFs, my complete and thorough opposite,

36. Do you visualize what you read/write? YES, it’s the second step in the process. step 1, VIBES. step 2, SEE IT. step 3, ATTEMPT TO DESCRIBE

37. Promote one of your own “deep cut” fics (an underrated one, or one that never got as much traction as you think it deserves!). What do you like about it? y’know what? i think i’ll do a couple. 1) waste not -- far as i know im the first to use the Virgin Cobb Vanth tag and you best believe i am smug as shit about that. he’s a lone wolf!! Mos Pelgo isn’t a place for him to live, it’s a place to protect!! 2) that same old song and dance -- it’s mentioned elsewhere in this post but i’ll plug it here again just because it was so much fun to write and i want people to like my dumb children

38. Did any of your fics get surprisingly popular (whatever that means to you)? Which ones? Why do you think they were so successful? salt in the wound, maybe! my first BobaCobb. i remain surprised that BobaCobb is so rare as it is, given the incomprehensibly intricate ways in which canon now binds these two together. but i think i was one of the first(ish) writers to feel like they needed their own fic space, and not just be in the background as leftovers from other pairings

39. Is any aspect of your writing process inspired by other writers or people? If so, who? everyone who mentioned that outlines help them write <3

40. Do you tend to reread fics or are you a one-and-done kind of person? ohhhh i reread. i likes my comforts foods :3 

41. Link a fic that made you think, “Wow, I want to write like that.” that’s what you’re good at, by ghost_teeth like.......... shit, fam.

42. Have you ever received a comment that particularly stood out to you for whatever reason? ohhhhh, yes. a very sweet reader once said they liked my take on Din Djarin so much, they’d want me to write a whole novel of him TT^TT <3

43. If you take/write prompts: what’s your favorite prompt fic that you’ve written? n/a

44. If you take/write prompts: do you prefer dialogue or scenario/narrative prompts? n/a

45. What’s something you’ve improved on since you started writing fic? pacing, i think, and being willing to let go of scenes that might not entirely fit

46. Do you prefer writing on your phone or on a computer (or something else)? Do you think where you write affects the way you write? pc for sure. i can write on my phone, but i prefer a keyboard. feels like the ideas come out faster on keyboard!

47. If [da capo (or: to the beginning)] was a pair of shoes, what kind would it be? Describe the shoes. the shoes you bought for an occasion that you didn’t think you’d like all that much, but are now part of your usual rotation

48. What’s the last fic you read? Do you recommend it? Hallmark Meeting! it’s cute and deliciously smutty

49. What are you currently working on? Share a few lines if you’re up for it! i’m gonna try my hand at some original long fic that i can hopefully shop around!  I don’t think. I kiss him.  Or, rather:  I tumble head-first into the sweet cavern of his mouth. By the flat of his tongue, he tucks me into the space where his top front teeth meets his soft palate and holds me there, safe and secreted. He holds me there, across my cheek, at my waist; he is the bank of my river, guiding me to flow into his lap. A blessing, his hands. Diligent, his kiss.

50. Answer any question of your choice, or talk about anything you want to talk about! there needs to be more anime in Mandalorian fic, and i mean that in ways i cannot fully articulate. like,,,,,,, not anime AUs necessarily but themes and storytelling styles and tropes more common in non-Western media