#‘​you could pour soup in my lap and I’d apologize to you’ vibes

[aprill-99]

EACH BRIDGERTON COUPLE AS JOHN MULANEY QUOTES:

Daphne & Simon:

Daphne: “A friend of mine asked me if I’d ever been given the sex talk, and the answer is yes… I think.”

Simon: “My father was COOOLD BLOODED.” + “Does my best friend hate me or do I just need to go to sleep?”

Kate & Anthony:

Anthony: “I’ll keep all my emotions right here and then one day, I’ll die.”

Kate: “Get out of here with your facts. Just because you’re accurate does not make you interesting.” + “I’m new in town, and it gets worse.”

Benedict & Sophie:

Benedict: “This is a healthy twenty-eight year old man trying his best.”

Sophie: “I was a maid for a while. I was treated well in my day. I worked for a variety of sirs.”

Colin & Penelope:

Colin: “My wife is a bitch and I like her soooooo much.”

Penelope: “We spend most of our time proving to people that we are who we say we are. Think about that for 10 seconds and tell me you don’t want to walk into the ocean.” + “People say crazy things all the time. And those things mean nothing to them, but they mean everything to me.”

Phillip & Eloise:

Eloise: “Thirteen year olds will make fun of you, but in an accurate way.”

Philip: “It was like, you know one of those days where you just go ‘this might as well happen.’”

Michael & Francesca:

Francesca: “I try to stay optimistic, but I will admit, things are getting pretty sticky.”

Michael: “We don’t get better than this. It’s just going to be worse versions of me from here on out.” + “And if you think I seem unlikable or out of control in that story, then just remember, that’s one I was willing to tell you.”

Hyacinth & Gareth:

Hyacinth: “Well none of us ever really know our fathers…… Anyway-”

Gareth: “I am very small. And I have no money. So you can imagine the kind of stress I am under.”

Lucy & Gregory:

Gregory: “I do hear you, and I also don’t want to be doing what I’m doing.”

Lucy: “In terms of instant relief, canceling plans is like heroine.”

Lady Danbury & Lord Ledger:

Lady Danbury: “Shut up you’re all going to die! Street smarts!” + “It’s wrong to make fun of people, but it’s just so fun sometimes.”

Lord Ledger: “My vibe is like ‘hey you could pour soup in my lap and I’d probably apologize to you.’”

George & Charlotte:

King George: “it seems like everyone, everywhere, is super mad about everything, all the time.”

Queen Charlotte: “I simply do not give a shit what anybody thinks of me in any situation.”

Bonus:

Violet: “Putting a thirteen year old in charge of your younger kids is like getting a dog to babysit your horse. If something goes wrong, they can just maybe get help a little more quickly.”

[thingsoverheardatua]

Amajiki: Mirio gives out a vibe right away of like ‘do not fuck with me’. Whereas my vibe is more like ‘you could pour soup in my lap and I’d apologize to you’.

[incorrectdovessoquotes]

Clarissa: Lesso gives off a vibe like right away like “don’t fuck with me”.

Clarissa: My vibe is more like “hey you could pour hot soup in my lap and I’d probably apologize to you”.

[trobedgirldads]

Greg: katie gives off a “do not fuck with me” vibe. my vibe is more like “you could pour soup in my lap and i’d probably apologize to you”

[callsign-bunnie]

Ooh can you do a characters as John Mulaney quotes post? Off the top of my head Graves might be “you have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair,” but I’d love to see what you think!

Had to consult the missus for this one as she is the ex John Mulaney fan.

--

Rodolfo: My vibe is like, hey you could probably pour soup in my lap and I’ll apologize to you.

Alejandro:  The more you do stuff, the better you get at dealing with how you still fail at it a lot of the time

Soap:  It's 100% easier not to do things than to do them.

Ghost: Just the entire goddamn street smarts bit

Price:  I look like I was just sitting in a room on a chair eating saltines for, like, 28 years

Gaz:  When I'm walking down the street I don't think anybody goes, 'Hey look at that man', they're just like 'Woah, that tall child looks terrible'

Graves:  You have your law practice; and me, I have all these fucking markers (this sounds like something he would say but also yours anon)

Valeria:  Maybe I just have high self-esteem, but I have a lot that I really enjoy.

Farah:  You can do good work by simply staying up all night and eating nothing but junk food, but probably not in the long term.

Alex:  Sometimes, people would say, ‘What do you think you’re doing?’ But that just meant, ‘Stop.’

Laswell:  Now I get to say, ‘My wife,’ which is very exciting. It has a lot of power to it. It’s fun to say, ‘My wife.’

[changeling-rin]

What's your favorite quote that describes each member of the chain?

(Including sequels and Oc's)

-Moon

Small problem, I don't really have favorite quotes? And I certainly don't have 30+ of them to assign to 30+ characters

I can, however, list my favorite line(s) of dialogue for them all! The ones who've had dialogue, at any rate, for the rest I may just use memes

DIALOGUE LINES

Gen: "One of these days, I'm going to learn from my past actions and not go to investigate everything that goes 'bump' when I'm not looking... But today is not that day." “I’d like to preface this interaction by stating that I am not interested in eating you.”

Speck: "I am having the strangest day."

The Four: "Vaati, uh... he didn't have much of a plan, as far as we can tell. We really just think he wanted to get married."

Ocarina: "I feel like he should concern me more. But for some reason he doesn't, and now I'm concerned about why I'm not more concerned."

Mask: "I just realized – you're me and I'm you. We just insulted ourselves and then agreed on it." “Good news, I bring therapy in the form of a fluffy dog.”

Dusk: "Personally, I just accept the weirdness and go with it. That way when a woman-bird pops out of a pot in the middle of a frozen arctic mountain on the kitchen floor of a Yeti's mansion and offers to let you use her as an item, you can just smile and nod."

Red: “But it's nicely relevant to you and your adventure and not at all a really obvious tie-in to your mode of transportation!” “You close up right now or I'm gonna smack the black right off your umbra!”

Green: "And I'm not going to tell you who's losing, partly because I don't think this is that kind of argument, but mostly because I think you're going to immediately join the winning side after I tell you who they are."

Blue: "WHAT!? WHAT'S HAPPENING AND WHO NEEDS PUNCHING!?"

Vio: "As far as I can tell, we end up wherever we need to be next. I'm suspecting divine intervention, but 'temporal shenanigans' are also in the running as a viable explanation."

Lore: "I resent being called a 'regular people'." "I demand the proper amount of hatred and villainous one-liners!"

Realm: "Eh, wouldn't be the weirdest place. Once I had to get my shield out of a Like-Like that was inside a Lynel that was inside a Dragon." "I know what happened, I accidentally tried to get somewhere on efficient transport. I'll be sure to face the other way and think about where we came from next time."

Sketch: “...You live in the stronghold of an Evil Overlord.”

Wind: "Have you by any chance seen a giant squid? I need to destroy it to save a pirate princess and a whale god. ...That made a lot more sense in my head."

Steam: “Right. Okay. I'm about to do something stupid and probably extremely dangerous with the vague hope that it won't kill me. Cool.”

Shadow: "I do what I want.” “He’s not dead yet and I’m going to fix that.”

MEMES AS SUBSTITUTION FOR DIALOGUE LINES

Oni: I've only had the Chain for a day and a half, but if anything happened to them I would kill everybody in the vicinity and then myself.

Rune: My vibe is like, hey you could probably pour soup into my lap and I'll apologize to you.

Lux: I'm going to punch your face! IN THE FACE!

Lyric: Everybody do the Flop! *collapses*

RSE: Stakataka Time

Wraith: I see dead people

Codex: If I were a better person, I'd ignore you and go on with my life. But I'm not.

Archive: Citizens of Hyrule, I stand before you because if I was behind you, you couldn't see me.

Mini: I am very small. And I have no money. So you can imagine the kind of stress I am under.

[fangirlshrewt97]

My Best Friend and My Brother

Ok this was partially inspired by a Tumblr post, but mostly came together in my head intended to be one thing, but the final piece turned out different than what I anticipated. I am also not super confident in how ...sensical ? this fic might be, so let me know your thoughts.

An attempt at Jai (Jai Lava Kusa) x Harsha (Magadeera)

///

"I can't believe you never told me you had such a hot brother." Harsha murmured to Lava from where they were eating their evening snack. Lava had invited his old friend to Annayya's mansion once Kusa and he had decided to stay here on a more permanent basis.

"Well I didn't even realize he was alive-" Lava froze with his samosa midway to his mouth. "Did you just say hot?"

Harsha tilted his head at him, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "Yeah? Look at him. He's freaking sexy."

Lava gaped at Harsha, opening and closing his mouth several times, but no words would come out.

"What?" Harsha asked defensively.

Lava sputtered, "He's, I'm...He's my twin brother!"

Harsha shrugged. "Only in appearance. I love you Lava but your ... um…vibe? It's the type to scream that if someone poured soup on your lap, you'd apologize to them. Him on the other hand..." Harsha turned to look in Annayya's direction with sultry eyes. “I’d love to get to know him more. And I think he feels the same.”

Lava punched his shoulder softly.

"Hey!" Harsha said as he rubbed the spot.

"Stop that. I just. You can't. You-" Lava's brain was still trying to process the situation. And failing miserably.

Harsha pouted at him. "Does he already have someone?"

Lava shook his head.

"Does he only like girls?"

"I-I'm not sure." Lava admitted hesitatingly.

Harsha brightened, a determined look in his eyes. Lava grabbed his forearm, gripping it tight. "Harsha, please. I just -"

Harsha's eyes flashed. "What is it, Lava? Is it that I'm also a guy? I know we don't really talk about it but like. I am not going to force myself on your brother you know."

"No!" Lava shouted quietly, lowering his voice to avoid drawing the attention of his brother's...henchmen. "No! It's not that, Harsha it doesn't bother me, I promise! You’re my best friend, you know I don’t care about that stuff."

"Then what man?" Harsha asked, arms crossed over his chest.

Lava bit his lip, thankful that Jai hadn't looked their way yet. 

"He's ... He's dangerous. He has a temper.I don’t want you to get tangled in his mess, or get hurt."

Harsha rolled his eyes. "I'm a big boy Lava, I can take care of myself."

And before Lava could reply, he was up and walking towards Jai, a distinct sway to his hips. Lava watched him go with wide eyes, hand still outstretched towards him. Lava didn’t miss the way Jai’s gaze slid to Harsha immediately, or how he stopped talking to watch his friend approach. Oh devuda, please let there be no bloodshed.

"Yo! Why didn't you tell me there were samosas!" Kusa's voice came from behind him. Lava managed to tear his gaze away from his friend to see his brother stuffing the second samosa on his plate down his throat.

Lava's lips pinched in disapproval, only to be met with a playful wink.

Lava turned back to see Harsha had reached Jai. He whimpered.

"What's your friend doing?" Kusa asked as he stood up to turn the chair around before sitting again, this time folding his hands over the back of the chair and resting his chin there.

"He... he's asking Annayya out." Lava said faintly.

Kusa guffawed loudly, only for it to morph into shock when Lava turned to him despairingly. "You're serious? Is your friend suicidal?"

Lava hit his brother's thigh. "Kusa! I'm worried."

"You should be. Annayya is going to tear him to pieces, look!"

Lava shipped his head around so fast he heard a snap. Jai had stood up and was chest to chest with Harsha, towering over him. Harsha did not look worried at all.

Lava clenched his fist tightly, until Kusa yelped at him to remove his hand.

"You know your friend could have asked me on a date if he just wanted adventure." Kusa said through a mouth full of food.

"Even I would pick Annayya over you." Lava answered absentmindedly. "Ow!"

Kusa was glaring at him, and Lava glared right back. "Why did you pinch me?"

"Oh, because you're such a catch are you?" Kusa retorted.

Lava's eyes twitched as he forced himself to take a calming breath. No one ever riled him like Kusa. It was infuriating, because it was exactly what the other man wanted and Lava hated how easily he fell into his brother's trap.

"Will you just help me?" He asked urgently.

"Help with what? Rescue? Or search and recovery?" Kusa bit back.

"Who are you recovering?" Harsha's voice interrupted.

Both men jumped and looked at the young man with astonishment.

"He lives." Kusa said to no one in particular.

Harsha raised an eyebrow at him before turning to Lava and smiling wolfishly. "I told you I'd be fine."

"What-what happened?" Lava asked.

"He said yes."

"WHAT?" Both brother exclaimed simultaneously before swiveling to look at their eldest. Who was looking back at them. Or, rather, at Harsha's back.

Even from the distance they could make out their brother was ... enthralled by him.

Their eyes were the size of dining plates when they turned back to Harsha. He threw them another cheeky, grabbing the last samosa from the plate before walking away. He was definitely putting an exaggerated sway to his hips.

That is, until he reached the doorway, where he paused to throw a wink at Jai over his shoulder.

Kusa choked slightly, and Lava flicked his ear hard. "Stop it!"

"That hurt!" Kusa swore as he rubbed at his ear. “Also, he’s your friend so you can’t ogle at him. I however-”

Lava flicked him again, returning his glare in equal strength. 

"It was supposed to hurt." Lava hissed.

Suddenly a shadow fell over their table. Both brothers gulped before looking up their brother in sync.

Jai seemed to be giving off a more threatening air than usual. Lava was half certain his heart would jump out of his chest and run away.

"Jai! So good of you to join us! We were just having samosas, do you want some? I can ask the cook to-" Jai cut off Kusa's rambling with a raised eyebrow and glare.

He turned to pin Lava with his gaze. Lava whimpered. "Can I help you Annayya?"

The silence seemed to drag on forever, and Lava felt each nerve light up as a drop of sweat rolled from his forehead down his face, his neck, his collarbones before finally disappearing inside his shirt. Jai's stare felt hotter than the midday sun they were sitting under.

"What does Harsha like?" He finally spoke.

Lava's thoughts screeched to a halt. His breath may have too.

"...huh?"

Jai leaned forward to wrap a hand around the back of Lava's chair. Lava squeaked.

"He has a huge sweet tooth. And loves biriyani. Dogs. Action movies. The color red. Um, and… and dancing! He loves clubs."

From the corner of his eye, he could see Kusa looking at him like he had lost his mind. Lava wouldn't argue against that notion.

Jai's gaze seemed to bore into him, as though to confirm he was actually telling the truth. He must have been satisfied because after a minute he leaned back, giving them a curt nod before walking away. He disappearing into the mansion, trailed by a stunned looking Kaakha.

"Holy shit." Kusa swore softly.

Lava keened as he collapsed against the chair, sliding half way to the floor. "I thought I was going to die."

"What just happened?"

Both brothers looked at each other, astonishment coloring both their faces.

"Did...did Annayya just ask you for ideas about dates?" Kusa said.

Lava's eyes widened.

A slow but feral grin took over Kusa's face. "This is the best day ever. Where's Harsha?"

Lava looked panic stricken.  ”Why?”

“I want to know what he said to Jai! I mean come on, Jai is captivated! I want to know this guy better! That way we can guarantee Annayya seduces him!”

Lava grimaced. “This feels like a recipe for disaster.”

Kusa threw a used tissue paper at him. “Come on Lava! You are always the one pushing for us to do nice things for Annayya! Now that we have a chance of possibly setting him up with someone he likes and could maybe have a relationship with, you are backing away?”

“I-” Lava had to conceed the point to Kusa.  For all his apprehensions, Harsha was very clever and also knew how to fight. And if Annayya had really been angry about Harsha’s …proposition, Annayya would not have asked him about what Harsha enjoyed.

Kusa looked at him with eager eyes.

Lava sighed, rubbing his face, praying that this would not blow up in their faces.

“Okay. Let’s help Annayya,” and dear god, this was painful, this was Lava’s friend they were talking about. “seduce Harsha.”

Kusa whooped as he jumped up from the table, grabbing Kusa by the upper arm. “Let’s go!”

In the recesses of his brain which weren’t still clouded by fear of Annayya, Lava thought that Harsha might actually be a great match for his brother.

///

Man, my comedy stuff sounds way funnier in my head than on paper...

@rambheem-is-real @budugu @bromance-minus-the-b @hissterical-nyaan @obsessedtoafault @hufhkbgg @yehsahihai @rorapostsbl @fadedscarlets @alikokinav @chaotic-moonlight @rambheemisgoated @rambheemlove @jaganmaya @burningsheepcrown @lovingperfectionwonderland @rosayounan @iam-siriuslysher-lokid @thewinchestergirl1208 @dumdaradumdaradum @ronaldofandom @jjwolfesworld @jrntrtitties @kashpaymentsonly @jeonmahi1864 @zackcrazyvalentine @stanleykubricks @tulodiscord @teddybat24 @sally-for-sally @jadebomani @stuckyandlarrystuff @veteran-fanperson @ohfuckoffpls  @carminavulcana @boochhaan @doodlesofthelastpage @filesbeorganized @meownique @ssabriel @meastradeur @ronika-writes-stuff @umbrulla @ladydarkey

[silvershewolf247]

Glen: All my friends give out a vibe right away of like ‘do not fuck with me’. Whereas my vibe is more like ‘you could pour soup in my lap and I’d apologize to you’.

[capsicleunderoostank]

Peter: Some people give off a vibe of, like, right away they’re like ‘Do not mess with me.’

MJ: Your vibe is more like, ‘Hey, you could pour hot soup on my lap and I’D probably apologize to YOU!‘

[solarishashernoseinabook]

thank you sm for the ID on the character bingo!!!! sending in halt from rangers apprentice if you'd like :)

!!! thank you!! sorry this took me a bit to get to slghslgh

gosh i was SO close to getting a bingo but i like the canon very much for him so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (shrug emoji)

And halt is SO. AUTISTIC.

[Image ID: a bingo sheet titled “Character Bingo”.

The first row reads “my special little meow meow. my every waking thought. my dearest blorbo”; “i don’t have anything against them personally but they failed the vibe check”; “im the only one that knows anything about them, actually. everyone else is wrong sorry”; “if i met them irl i would beat them up (affectionate)”; and “i would unplug their life support to charge my phone”. “my special little meow meow. my every waking thought. my dearest blorbo” is marked with a red star.

The second row reads “i like the fanon better for this one”; “a pathetic wet cat of a man”; “my anti blorbo. i am constantly thinking of them and i hate it”; “knowing of their existence fills me with incredibly violent urges”; and “they could’ve been such a great character if they were handled differently”.

The third row reads “*gently holds*”; “don’t care about them tbh”; “free space”; “(keysmash)”; and “i sincerely do not understand the hype”. "*gently holds*", "free space", and "(keysmash)" are marked with red stars.

The fourth row reads “they have done nothing wrong, ever, in their life”; “i don’t even go here but i’d die for them”; “not to be homosexual but Jesus fucking Christ. oh. my go d. holy shjt”; “Autism™️”; and “genuinely. what the fuck”. “they have done nothing wrong, ever, in their life” and “Autism™️” are marked with red stars; in addition, "autism" has yellow lines around it as extra highlighting.

The fifth row reads “will somebody give them a fucking hug jesus christ”; “they could pour soup in my lap and i’d apologize to them”; “they are literally so based”; “there’s nothing going on behind those eyes <3”; and “i want to kiss their poor little head”. “will somebody give them a fucking hug jesus christ” and “they could pour soup in my lap and i’d apologize to them” are marked with red stars. /end]

Link to the ask game if you want to play!

[autismcupcake]

Can I get uhhhhhhhhhh susato and gina for the ask bingo

YES YOU FUCKIN CAN BESTIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[ID: a bingo sheet titled “character bingo” with the word bingo capitalized in larger text with one letter over each column. It has been filled out with semi transparent images of Susato Mikotoba.

The first row’s spaces are “my special little meow meow. my every waking thought. my dearest blorbo”, “I don’t have anything against them personally but they failed the vibe check”, “I’m the only one who knows anything about them, actually. everyone else is wrong sorry”, “if I met them irl I would beat them up (affectionate)” and I would unplug their life support to charge my phone".

The second row has “I like the fanon better for this one”, “a pathetic wet cat of a man”, “my anti blorbo. I am constantly thinking of them and I hate it”, “knowing of their existence fills me with incredibly violent urges” and “they could’ve been such a good character if they were handled differently”.

The third row is “*gently holds*” which has been filled out, “don’t care about them tbh”, “free space” also filled out, “[long keyemash in all caps]” and “I sincerely do not understand the hype”.

In the fourth row there is “they have never done anything, ever, in their life” which is filled out, "I don’t even go here but I’d die for them tbh” “not to be a homosexual but jesus fucking christ. Oh. My god. Holy shit.”, “Autism™” so filled out, and “genuinely. What the fuck.”

The final row has “will somebody give them a fucking hug jesus christ”, “they could pour soup in my lap and I’d apologize to them” which is filled out, “they are literally so based” also filled out, “there’s nothing going on behind those eyes [heart emoji]” and “I want to kiss their poor little head”

End ID

[ID: a bingo sheet titled “character bingo” with the word bingo capitalized in larger text with one letter over each column. It has been filled out with semi transparent images of Gina Lestrade.

The first row’s spaces are “my special little meow meow. my every waking thought. my dearest blorbo” which is filler out, “I don’t have anything against them personally but they failed the vibe check”, “I’m the only one who knows anything about them, actually. everyone else is wrong sorry” also filled out, “if I met them irl I would beat them up (affectionate)” and I would unplug their life support to charge my phone".

The second row has “I like the fanon better for this one”, “a pathetic wet cat of a man”, “my anti blorbo. I am constantly thinking of them and I hate it”, “knowing of their existence fills me with incredibly violent urges” and “they could’ve been such a good character if they were handled differently”.

The third row is “*gently holds*” which is filled out, “don’t care about them tbh”, “free space” also filled out, “[long keyemash in all caps]”, which is filled out, and “I sincerely do not understand the hype”.

In the fourth row there is “they have never done anything, ever, in their life” which is filled out, “I don’t even go here but I’d die for them tbh” “not to be a homosexual but jesus fucking christ. Oh. My god. Holy shit.” also filled out, “Autism™”, filled out as well, and “genuinely. What the fuck.”

The final row has “will somebody give them a fucking hug jesus christ", “they could pour soup in my lap and I’d apologize to them”, “they are literally so based”, “there’s nothing going on behind those eyes [heart emoji]” and “I want to kiss their poor little head”. Everything in this row except "there's nothing going on behind those eyes [heart emoji]" has been filled out.

End ID]

Almost got so many bingos with this one.... Gina beloved <3

[aprill-99]

I did one of these for BBC Musketeers so why not… Star Trek Picard Characters as John Mulaney Quotes!

Picard: *to all new Star Fleet and most of the people he meets* “You have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair” + “Too old to be a duck, quack quack!”

Seven: “it’s never too soon to learn our national No Snitching policy.”

Raffi: *slams down the news bulletin confirming all of her Romulan conspiracy theories in front of Picard* “The other shoe just dropped!”

Cris: “I never cared much about Star Fleet politics. Never talked about them much, but then nine years ago, the strangest thing happened.” + *about taking on the motley crew* “how dare you all celebrate the worst financial decision I ever made?”

Agnes: “My vibe is more ‘you could pour soup in my lap and I’d probably apologize to you.’” + “Get out of here with your shit! Everyone has seen a bird in the airport, this is a horse! Loose! In a HOSPITAL!”

Soji: “I used to not understand how anyone could murder someone, then some things happened with my Ex and I was like, ‘oh okay’.” + “My dad is such an interesting person. I’d like to meet him someday.”

Elnor: “When I was a child I met Admiral Picard, shook his hand and said ‘you can do whatever you want forever.’ And he took my advice.”

[anneonomus]

Ykw? Also Tim drake <3 I support you going insane <3

[ID: a 5 x 5 bingo board labeled “character BINGO”.

The first row reads, 1) “my special little meow meow. my every waking thought. my dearest blorbo”, 2) “i don’t have anything against them personally but they failed the vibe check”, 3) “im the only one that knows anything about them, actually. everyone else is wrong sorry”, 4) “if i met them irl i would beat them up (affectionate)”, 5) “i would unplug their life support to charge my phone”.

The second row reads, 1) “i like the fanon better for this one”, 2) “a pathetic wet cat of a man”, 3) my anti blorbo. i am constantly thinking of them and I hate it”, 4) “knowing of their existence fills me with incredibly violent urges” , 5) “they could’ve been such a great character if they were handled differently”.

The third row reads, 1) “*gently holds*”, 2) “don’t care about them tbh”, 3) “FREE SPACE”, 4) “ASDGJDJSJJSZDVNMSWJGKSXHRJKDGRGHWJHRKWUREKWRHOSDGKFWOHJSSFHJ”, 5) “I sincerely do not understand the hype”.

The fourth row reads, 1) “they have done nothing wrong, ever, in their life”, 2) “i don’t even go here but i’d die for them”, 3) “not to be a homosexual but Jesus fucking Christ. oh. my go d. holy shjt”, 4) “Autism™️”, 5) “genuinely. what the fuck”.

The fifth row reads, 1) “will someone give them a fucking hug Jesus Christ”, 2) “they could pour soup in my lap and i’d apologize to them”, 3) “they are literally so based”, 4) “there’s nothing going on behind those eyes <3”, 5) “i want to kiss their poor little head”.

“my special little meow meow. my every waking thought. my dearest blorbo”, “im the only one that knows anything about them, actually. everyone else is wrong sorry”, “if i met them irl i would beat them up (affectionate)”, “a pathetic wet cat of a man”, “knowing of their existence fills me with incredibly violent urges”, “*gently holds*”, “FREE SPACE”, “ASDGJDJSJJSZDVNMSWJGKSXHRJKDGRGHWJHRKWUREKWRHOSDGKFWOHJSSFHJ”, “Autism™️”, “genuinely. what the fuck”, “will someone give them a fucking hug Jesus Christ”, “they are literally so based”, and “there’s nothing going on behind those eyes <3” are highlighted in pink. “1/2” is written in pink highlighter over “i like the fanon better for this one”. End ID]

*ferociously biting and shaking him around like an overexcited dog with a chew toy* guys i am So Normal about this character! don’t ask me why i’m covered in blood it’s irrelevant just trust me <3

[vivalamusicaltheater]

Also ykw? Me for character bingo (Elliot Timothy Anneonomus) 🥰

[ID: a 5 x 5 bingo board labeled “character BINGO”.

The first row reads, 1) “my special little meow meow. my every waking thought. my dearest blorbo”, 2) “i don’t have anything against them personally but they failed the vibe check”, 3) “im the only one that knows anything about them, actually. everyone else is wrong sorry”, 4) “if i met them irl i would beat them up (affectionate)”, 5) “i would unplug their life support to charge my phone”.

The second row reads, 1) “i like the fanon better for this one”, 2) “a pathetic wet cat of a man”, 3) my anti blorbo. i am constantly thinking of them and I hate it”, 4) “knowing of their existence fills me with incredibly violent urges” , 5) “they could’ve been such a great character if they were handled differently”.

The third row reads, 1) “*gently holds*”, 2) “don’t care about them tbh”, 3) “FREE SPACE”, 4) “ASDGJDJSJJSZDVNMSWJGKSXHRJKDGRGHWJHRKWUREKWRHOSDGKFWOHJSSFHJ”, 5) “I sincerely do not understand the hype”.

The fourth row reads, 1) “they have done nothing wrong, ever, in their life”, 2) “i don’t even go here but i’d die for them”, 3) “not to be a homosexual but Jesus fucking Christ. oh. my go d. holy shjt”, 4) “Autism™️”, 5) “genuinely. what the fuck”.

The fifth row reads, 1) “will someone give them a fucking hug Jesus Christ”, 2) “they could pour soup in my lap and i’d apologize to them”, 3) “they are literally so based”, 4) “there’s nothing going on behind those eyes <3”, 5) “i want to kiss their poor little head”.

“My special little meow meow. my every waking thought. my dearest blorbo”, “if i met them irl i would beat them up (affectionate)”, “a pathetic wet cat of a man”, “*gently holds*”, “FREE SPACE”, “ASDGJDJSJJSZDVNMSWJGKSXHRJKDGRGHWJHRKWUREKWRHOSDGKFWOHJSSFHJ”, “they have done nothing wrong, ever, in their life”, the “i’d die for them” portion of “i don’t even go here but i’d die for them”, “Autism™️”, “genuinely. what the fuck”, “will someone give them a fucking hug Jesus Christ”, “they are literally so based”, and “there’s nothing going on behind those eyes <3” are hilighted in yellow. End ID]

ELLIOT I LOVE YOU!!!!! The “someone” in “will someone give them a fucking hug Jesus Christ” is me btw <3 also please note that the “a pathetic wet cat of a man”, “genuinely. what the fuck”, and “there’s nothing going on behind those eyes <3” are out of LOVE!! I am mentally headbutting you like a cat.

Also I know that you would argue that you “have actually done things wrong in your life” but idc I’m the biggest Elliot apologist ever & I’m here to tell you you have done nothing wrong ever in your life <3

[daughter-of-melpomene]

Tabby: “Some people, like Lydia, give off a vibe of… right away, they’re like ‘Do not fuck with me’.”

Tabby: “My vibe is more like, ‘Hey, you could pour hot soup in my lap and I’d probably apologize to you’.”

[headinthstars]