#“Well first of all he was not always walking around with a cane. In fact we pictured him in a wheelchair.”

[draculovemp3]

An early idea/concept of House’s mobility aid being a wheelchair… I would like to see It. Waves hands people with actual creative effort you know what to do.

[sidekick-hero]

On top of the world

Written for the @steddieholidaydrabbles, prompt 'graduation' | 616 words | tags: fix it, Steve is a sweetheart and takes care of Eddie, first kiss

Before March 21st, Eddie would have said not graduating again was the worst thing that could happen to him. Now, Eddie knows better.

Nothing like almost dying to put things into perspective, right?

He misses the days when his biggest worry was convincing old witch O'Donnell to give him a "D" and let him leave Hawkins High. Now that he knows what a real hellhole looks like, he thinks he could survive another year under Higgins' thumb.

Still, he doesn't exactly mind when Nancy comes over to his and Wayne's new house—part of the government deal the kids cut for him while he was in a coma—to tell him that he's going to graduate with his class.

He doesn't question it either, just whoops enthusiastically enough to almost pull his stitches, which hurts but has the added bonus of Steve putting his big hands all over him to check his numerous healing wounds.

A week on the run and fighting interdimensional monsters with the guy has changed Eddie's perspective on what’s the best thing that could happen to him as well.

On graduation day, he walks across the stage with a cane for support, something he hadn’t thought possible. It was Steve who had made that happen, even if he refused to accept Eddie's praise. The moment Eddie had muttered under his breath after Nancy had left, ‘But how am I supposed to walk the fucking stage if I can't even go to the bathroom without taking a break?' Steve was a man on a mission.

They practiced every day, before or after Steve's work helping out at the hospital. They needed every helping hand they could get after the damage Vecna and the Upside Down monsters had caused. Eddie could attest to how wonderful Steve's hands were at helping. In fact, he could write songs about it once his hands stopped shaking whenever he held a pencil (or anything, really) for too long.

Eddie wondered if every one of Steve's patients was as in love with him as he was.

As Eddie snags his diploma from Higgins, who looks like he bit into a particularly bitter lemon, Eddie marvels that flipping him the bird isn’t as exhilarating as expected.

Maybe that’s because of last night and the way Steve’s lips felt on his. Every moment since then simply pales in comparison.

Steve had come over after another shift at the hospital, probably sore and exhausted, but giving Eddie one of his dazzling smiles that always made him weak in the knees. Which was kind of counterproductive, considering what they were trying to accomplish here.

They were both trying so hard but Eddie’s legs just wouldn’t cooperate. No matter what Steve tried, they buckled after a few steps, forcing Eddie to sit down or fall down. He had made progress, the muscles in his legs slowly coming back, but three weeks had been too short.

Or so he thought.

Eddie doesn’t know how or why, but this time, Steve had simply positioned himself as far away from Eddie as possible and spread his arms as wide as his smile. “I got you, Eds. I’ll never let you fall. If you can’t trust in yourself just yet, trust in me.”

He had, believing that those strong arms would wrap around him if he stumbled.

He didn’t stumble, didn’t fall, but wrap around him they did anyway. Steve had picked him up and twirled him around, and then he’d kissed him, grinning mouth to grinning mouth.

Eddie might not have graduated top of his class, but he sure feels like he’s on top of the world when he catches Steve’s eye among the cheering group of his friends.

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

It’s gone midnight and I’m thinking about Six of Crows so y’all know what that means: it’s time for a long rambling thought process that will hopefully have some interesting insights into the books in it.

I want to talk about the animal, mostly bird, symbolism of these books because although it’s obviously something we’re very aware of I also think it’s something that runs a lot deeper than we necessarily always realise/talk about. Even when people aren’t being directly involved in bird metaphors (crows, pigeons, peacocks) they are often described as “squawking”, “flapping”, or with other phrases that further this semantic field.

Now the crows is obviously the main source of the symbolism, and it’s openly talked about in the book with the speech on how the recognise human faces and how they support each other. I’ve also seen a few people online talking about the Crows in conjunction with a poem/nursery rhyme about crows (it’s one of those that has many different versions spun of it, some know it was counting magpies rather than crows) wherein 6 crows symbolises gold, of course greatly linked to the plot of the novels as well as their anti-extreme capitalism message. It’s also key to mention that crows are massively underestimated birds in the general public view; they’re far ‘smarter’ animals than we would typically expect. Crows have a very high brain to body mass ratio, I believe the highest of any birds but don’t quote me on that, and although we understand very little about the brain the size ratio is currently considered a very good indicator for the general intelligence level of the animal. Crows can make tools, hide their food, mate for life, and - VERY interestingly for this book analysis - have even been suspected to hold funerals. Now I want to be clear I’m working on a mix of random knowledge and the first helpful looking website that came up when I googled ‘fun facts about crows’ so I am by no means an expert here, but to my understanding the practice that was initially considered to be a ‘crow funeral’ is actually a process wherein crows will gather around a dead crow to look for potential danger. So I feel like the links I’m establishing here are relatively obvious, the point is that, like the birds themselves, the Crows are undervalued, underestimated, and unexpectedly successful. But the symbol of the crow in these books arguably goes even further.

The crow-headed handle of Kaz’s cane represents everything about the crow I’ve already mentioned on top of his own symbolic layering to the cane as a sign that no part of him has not been broken, and no part him is not better for having been broken. So in Chapter 27 of Crooked Kingdom, when Kaz returns to the Slat and fights the Dregs before leading a coup against Per Haskell, the cane with the fake crow’s head that Haskell has contrived to mock him effectively represents the failing of everything the Dregs represent. They’re last, the remnants, the people with nowhere else to go: they are the people who have been broken and have made something new for themselves. Except Haskell. So the sheer ridiculousness of him mocking Kaz’s cane, something he clearly thought would win him favour and success, in the end becomes one of the biggest aspects of his downfall. Inej describes the moment when the Dregs begin to support Kaz, the way the look at Per Haskell with discomfort - “the feathers in his hat, the canes in his hands” (and then she goes on to highlight how they’ve seen Kaz use his cane in fights, “wielded with such precision”, whereas Haskell is washed-up, pathetic, never could have taken the fight Kaz did and walked out the other side). Of course they realise, then, how completely and utterly wrong all of this was. Because when they’re confronted with both of those canes they realise something. They know what Kaz’s cane represents; it’s power and strength in spite of a world that has that has scorned him, it’s taking something that was broken and not fixing it but emphasising it and making it into a threat, into a symbol, into a strength. They know that, even though they don’t know what happens in Kaz’s head, because they see themselves in that. The Dregs; the literal bottom of the Barrel, who have been broken and who have clawed their way to survival. They cannot see themselves in Haskell’s mockery cane. Haskell is not a man who reflects what the Dregs are at their core, but Kaz is. The emphasis on the feathers is also really interesting, because I think it’s implying a sort of gaudy, colourful feathering that (despite fitting in with the style of the Barrel) does not represent the symbol of the crow; it is not something shadowed, something half hidden that could have an unexpected bite. It’s almost more akin to Heleen’s gaudy peacock feathers than it is to anything the Dregs understand, or represent through being Crows.

The pigeons I don’t really see anyone talking about, but I think it’s pretty interesting. The idea of ‘the pigeon’ is the same as ‘the mark’; they’re the victim, the fool who’s easy to swindle. I think the imagery of the fools being pigeons, ie being everywhere and massively populating big cities, is really clever to show a divide between the few, the Crows, and the many, the pigeons. However, it’s not only the Crows who remark on others being ‘pigeons’, but other gangs as well. When Kaz confronts Pekka about the scam he ran on him and Jordie, he says “you were just two pigeons, and I happened to be the one who plucked you”. I’m not gonna lie to you guys I’m losing my point slightly, but I just googled ‘crows and pigeons’ and the first thing that came up was about how crows sometimes eat pigeons so I reckon that’s pretty relevant.

Ok I’m really tired and I feel like I’m clutching at straws here, so I dunno I guess if this does well then I’ll cover peacocks, lions, and the general semantic field of birds in another post. I hope at least some of this made sense, thanks for reading it if you bothered to get this far

[passionateseadruid]

Snake King's bride 4

The announcement

⚠️CONTENT WARING: THERE WILL BE SOME MENTIONS OF PERIODS THIS CHAPTER! IT'S NOT THE WHOLE CHAPTER I'LL MARK WERE IT IS SO IF ANYONE IS UNCOMFORTABLE WITH IT YOU CAN JUST SKIP. IT'S NOTHING GRAFFIC BUT I UNDERSTAND IF IT MIGHT MAKE SOME OF YOU UNCOMFORTABLE! ALSO FORCED KISSING FROM HERE ON OUT!⚠️ Sometimes I need to write shit for myself okay!

Two weeks had past since you'd met Charlie and Renesmee and her wife (Nina) had started to work for you. Renesmee had become a maid to you. Waking you up, helping you pick out your outfit, and she and Nina would have breakfast with you the days Lucifer didn't make you breakfast.

Nina was a tall succubus. She had cotton candy pink skin and hot pink hair, and her horns resembled a heart but they pointed outward. Nina wore a slick leather outfit with a bulletproof vest and forearm and shin pads. For a succubus Nina wasn't particularly curvy but she was very tall, 7 feet tall in fact. You didn't exactly make the best first impression with her because the first thing you said was "Dang where did the WNBA hide you?"

Other than the scowl she had on her face she was always cordial at breakfast. And she seemed to get along well enough with Pluto the head of Lucifer's security.

////////////////////////////////////////

WARNING PERIOD CONTENT AHEAD!

One morning you awoke in a pool of your own blood with a splitting pain in your abdomen.

"I'm dying." You mumbled.

"DARLING WHAT'S WRONG?" Lucifer bursts in with a puff of red smoke. He sees you on the bed dark red, almost black, on the sheets. He was in his normal outfit, minus the hat, jacket and cane.

"I'm so glad I used your old shirt as my pajama's last night." You mumbled and got up. "Did- Charlie is half angel."

"Yes?"

"But then again Lilith was human wasn't she? Well you do know what a period is. Do you have anything to deal with this?"

"Oh your uh- I'll have someone clean up the sheets and blankets. How about I run a bath for you and make you some food?" 

"I'll go run a bath and if you decide to make me food you can have Renesmee or Styx deliver it."

"Nonsense! And let them see your body, especially before I get to? Unthinkable. Why are you so mean to me?"

"You're the one who caused this asshole.

"Well now we know when you're ovulating, next month I can take care of this problem for you~" You rush to the bathroom and lock the door. "Think about it! For nine months you would get to eat whatever you wanted and you wouldn't have to deal with a period~"

"Please just get me some pain meds and pads!"

Before you appeared a light pink bottle and a glass. Outside the door you hear a big thud and when you crack the door you see packets of every type of hygiene product you might need. Tampons, pad with and without wings, thin and thick. You name it it was in there.

"At least he's not asking me what size pussy I wear." You rolled your eyes.

(A/n: That's so Adam core, I miss him so much. ;-;)

////////////////////////////////////////

OKAY IT'S OVER

You get out of the tub and wrap a towel around you and step into your room to change into some sweatpants and a zipper hoodie.

"You uh... you look comfy." You quickly turn around and see Lucifer standing in the doorway, pancakes in his hands. His cheeks were even more red then the clown circles he has.

"How long have you been standing there?"

"I-I didn't see anything! Really! You just look so comfy. I never got to see Lilith in anything that didn't show off her curves so seeing my bride to be in something that looks so soft is... different. A good different for sure! Can I... can I have a hug please? I just want to feel how soft it is."

"No."

He rolls his eyes. He walks over to a little mahogany table between the bed and the bathroom. Couches on either side. "You know, I don't get you. I've given you everything you could ask for and more. But you don't seem to care. You just sit around in the library or in your room all day. You're not trying to get to know me like you claim. And another thing, I know that you're not traditional. I may not know what your reason for telling these lies is but I know when you lie."

'That's right. One of his epithets is the father of lies.'

"Thank you for what you've done for me this morning. But I'd like to be left alone." 

"As you wish darling." He takes his leave. 

Nina and Renesmee walked in and you sat on one of the couches to eat the pancakes that Lucifer made for you. Renesmee cleaned up the room and you looked at her. "Hey do you need any help?"

"Miss please we go through this every day. I'm your maid, and I'm sure the king would prefer if you didn't lift a finger."

"I don't care what the king says. I don't want you to overwork yourself."

"I'm fine miss. I'm much more equipped to be a maid than my position in my old job. I'm quick and I like rolling around on the janitor cart."

"I still feel bad. I've never had a maid in my life. On top of that the king is okay with this unfair social system where Imps are looked down upon simply because of how they were born. I'm not going to participate in that just because it's how the way things are."

"Ahem!" Styx Calls from the doorway. "Sorry to interrupt but the king has sent some files over regarding the Halloween ball that will be held at the end of the month. He also sent a note. 'Sorry to drop this on you doll but Lilith was usually the one to handle planning the events we hosted. I've sent over everything we have regarding past years, please see to it by the end of the day and if you could select one of the couples costumes I've chosen for us to wear.' "

You took the files from them and looked through them. "Thank you Styx... here this is the costume I want." You hand a photo to them and start looking through the other files. You spend the rest of the day getting it ready, with the help of Renesmee and Nina of course. Ordering decoration, hiring a caterer, hiring temporary staff to help attendants, renting furniture, booking a band, and making a guest list.

"Do you guys think they'll play monster mash?" You ask the women.

"I don't know what that is, miss." Renesmee shook her head.

"Human music my love." Nina said monotonously.

"What do you think you two will wear?"

"Oh! uh..." Renesmee looked away bashfully.

"We're not coming." Nina said in the same tone.

"What? Why?" You asked disappointed.

"We get one night off we're not spending it at work." Nina glared at you.

"Okay, you don't have to come. I just thought it would be fun to have you two there." You dropped the issue.

////////////////////////////////////////

At the end of the month you (unwillingly) got ready for the party. You put on a short red dress with a sweetheart neckline and an under bust corset, along with a small white waist apron. Several stylists crowd around you. Lucifer had cast an illusion on you earlier that day to transform you identically to how you looked the day you went to the mall with him. One of the stylists curled your hair, one worked on your nails, one worked on your make-up (applying bright red lipstick and such) and the last was supervising and communicating with Lucifer's stylists.

"No Sharron! I told you we cannot compromise on the ears. Madam Rouge personally made these designs, she's going to be there tonight, and if everything is not to her liking she is going to have a fit.

...

Well the king should have thought about that before he ordered it.

...

If he thinks it embarrassing maybe HE should have picked out the costume.

...

That's not my problem, Sharron. Madam Rogue isn't going to accept excuses, especially not "He was trying to make her more comfortable".

...

Like I JUST SAID Sharron. If the king thinks the faux fur ears are itchy he has to deal with it.

...

I don't care if he's the king Sharron! Fine if you're being a pussy I'll deal with it. Put him on the phone."

"I can deal with it ma'am."

"Would you? Thank you sweetheart, you're such a gem." She mutes the phone for a second. "Keep this between you and me, I prefer you over Lilith. That lazy bitch would NEVER have dealt with His Majesty when he's having one of his temper tantrums." You take the phone and un mute him as she keeps rambling. "He's worse than Vox and Val I swear. I don't care what Velvette says, that bitch is a liar, or she gives herself too much credit."

(A/n: Velvette and Vox! My BBGs❤️ Fuck Valentino! he's a piece of💩)

"Hi." You say into the unmuted receiver. "How are you?"

"Hi Darling! Everything is fine but the ears and gloves are kind of itchy. I'm glad that Rogue didn't insist on something weird for the tail like a-"

"Okay! Okay! That's enough. Look I know it might be uncomfortable but it's just for one night."

"I want a kiss for being good then."

"Fine. I'll see you in five'"

"Bye Darling~"

About an hour into the night you left Lucifer talking to some of his friends to go find some food. He wore all gray with wolf ears, claws, and a tail (attached to a belt; a tight leather one-piece with a faux fur collar; and some boots. You brought your red hood over your face to try to ward of lingering eyes trying to catch a peak at Lucifer's new bitch.

You looked back to the couple that he was talking to. An Imp almost his height with a green jester cap and a black and white stripped suit; paired with a tall demon with three faces dressed in a big ruffled red dress that had an open shirt in the front with pants.

You wandered around, looking at other people's costumes and trying to find the snack bar. That Madam Rouge lady had dressed up as Glenda from the wizard of Oz. There was a guy with a TV head who was dressed up like batman in the corner making out with a tall guy dressed up as the Joker. With a girl dressed up as Harley Quinn filming the whole thing.

You looked away and saw Charlie in a Green shirt with a big M on it and a matching tutu and bow and a girl next to her with gray skin and white hair dressed identically but in brown.

You wanted to make your way over to them but as soon as Charlie saw you she ran. You followed her to try and explain yourself. To try and see if she could get you out of Hell. 

"That's her Vaggie!"

"Hun calm down."

"Dad's breaking all the rules for a woman he just met!"

"We don't know that."

"Vaggie! She's human! Living human souls aren't allowed in either of the afterlife's. My mom had to be turned into the first Succubus to even survive in Hell. This is breaking so many conventions. If he makes a deal for a soul he has to devour the person's soul or kill them and drag them to hell. He has a living human with him!"

'He certainly wants to devour me but not in the way you think Charlie.' you think.

"Maybe it's a misunderstanding. You could ask him."

"How can I ask him about her after I blew up at him!? How could he take a girl so young to be his wife? Vaggie she's so young she could be my grand kid!"

"Yeah but you've been alive for thousands of years Charlie. I don't think normal rules apply here."

"I just... wish that she had more time to experience independence before being thrust into this."

"He seems happy." This Vaggie girl said.

"I suppose. And I want him to be happy. He deserves to be happy. And she did invite us. Maybe she wants this. Okay. I'll go apologize to dad and tell him he has my blessing.

'Abort mission! Abort Mission!' You turn and run. You run so far away from the ball room you realize you've found yourself at the guest bathrooms.

"Wow! Hello cutie~" you turn around and see a man dressed as a vampire. "May I just say I love the costume! You're Luci's girl huh? What made you two want to be little red ridding hood and the big bad wolf."

"I felt it fitting. Him being a predator and me being his victim."

"Okay that turned dark real quick. Sold your soul to him huh?"

"No. I was sacrificed, by someone I thought was my friend."

"Oof. That's tough."

"I want to get away from him so badly." You confess. "I'm tired of him love bombing me steady."

"Maybe I can help. The names Agamemnon! I'm an up and coming overlord of Hell You sell your soul to me and I'll make sure you never have to talk to him again." He holds out his hand.

"Deal." You take his hand without thinking about it for even a second.

He takes off your cape, draping it over his arm and wraps his coat around you.

He led you through the ballroom toward the exit, and just when you are at the desolate foyer you two are blinded by a bright flash and when the light fades you look to Agamemnon and see that he is no longer standing nest to you, a pile of dust in his place, covering your red cape. You look back and see a seething Lucifer. His horns popped out, a small flame burning in between them, a halo surrounding his horns. His eyes were red, and he has puffing out smoke from his huffs.

He walked up to you and ripped off the coat burning it to ashes in an instant. He pulled the red cape back on you and grabbed on your wrist. "How DARE you! You sold your soul to a filthy SINNER? I've tried to be good. I've tried to seduce you. I've let you have your space. I've spoiled you. I was willing to give you time to fall in love with me. And yet apparently it hasn't been good enough for you. You know what? No more! You will be my wife, you will have my children, and you will LOVE ME!!" He pulled you back to the ball room. "If you say anything in there to ANYONE I'll kill your entire fucking family." He burst in and pulled you up on stage with him. "Attention everyone!" He smiled and continued. "We have an exciting announcement for you all! My beautiful bride and I are getting married in six months!" Your blood ran cold. For trying to run away he cut your time to escape in half. He knows what you're trying to do, but he needs time to prepare a wedding. He just got back into Charlie's good graces so he can't rush a wedding and mess things up.

For the rest of the night You stood next to him, his arm gripping your waist in a death grip, getting congrats and passive aggressively asking for an invitation.

"Hi..." Charlie came up to you and her dad. "I know that we didn't start off on the wrong foot, I've apologized to dad but I'd like to apologize to you as well."

"No that's okay. I grew up on the evil stepmom trope. I wouldn't blame you if you tried to shoot me with a shotgun but accidentally shot your dad and tried to frame me. I get it."

"Okay?"

"Have you never seen legally blonde?"

"No?"

"Oh, sorry to spoil the ending then."

"Anyway, I'm happy to have you join the family." She pulled you in for a hug. You hugged back as to not piss off Lucifer any more than you already had.

After the party Lucifer carried you to his room. you protested profusely and he threw you onto the bed. He held you down and snapped his fingers as your costume swapped into that of one of your night gowns. Your costume laid forgotten on his bed floor. He threw off his clothes and stayed in his boxers. "Don't get this twisted. This is not fun sexy times. I'm boing to hold you here tonight to make sure you understand that YOU. ARE. MINE."

"okay..." You nodded obediently. He pulled the covers over you both and wrapped his arm around you. His chest to four back.

"Goodnight doll. I hope you have sweet dreams of me~"

You said nothing as you cried yourself to sleep.

[ronwestbreeze]

TO YOU , WORLDS AWAY : PART TWO : CHAPTER FIFTEEN

pairing: jake sully x fem!reader

summary: in which tinkers tolerates norm...

word count: 3.6k

author's note: none! just hope you enjoy!

AO3 | prev | next

“They’re having a ceremony tonight.” Dr. Chloe told you while she was double checking one of the machines next to your hammock. “For an elder that unfortunately passed. I hear it’s really pretty. Perhaps you should see it, you know, get out of the hut for once.”

You had managed to sit up this time, though it took a lot of great difficulty. It seemed like as the days passed your body just became heavier and heavier to hold up yourself. You really weren’t even sure if you could even walk yet.

“Kind of hard to do that when I can barely sit upright.” You retorted. Unfortunately, you had found yourself disliking the doctor, mostly because she was completely oblivious to the fact that these machines she and her team had made weren’t necessarily doing much of anything but being a hindrance. Frankly, you weren’t even sure why she made it a point to check on you every single day and fill your head up with more false promises and progress.

Dr. Chloe waved a dismissive hand, “You don’t have to do much moving to see it. Technically, you can sit outside of your hut and watch from above. It’s similar to a march, you know? They walk throughout the clan’s grounds until they reach the burial site. So, you may just catch a glance at the ceremony as it passes by.”

“You sound like you’ve seen this.” You mumble offhandedly as Dr. Chloe finally stopped tampering with the machines.

“Why yes, I actually have! A few months back I was lucky to witness one. It was a beautiful ceremony, I think you might like it.”

There was really no point in responding to her as she was basically having a conversation with herself at one point. All you had to do was respond plainly until she finally made her leave.

That was when you glanced out your window for the first time that morning to see just a few miles away, a Samson landing. If you had to guess, it was probably Spider and his mother. During the past week you had been awake, Mary would always visit the Olangi Clan every other day and bring Spider along with her. It was the highlight of your day really, whenever the boy came to visit.

It was a nice distraction and good company. Better than Dr. Chloe’s that’s for sure. The one useful thing she had done was bring you a long thick wooden stick that would have been similar to a cane. She mentioned it would help with support and keeping you upright. You never admitted it out loud in front of her but yes, the wooden cane did help lots. In fact you haven’t allowed it out of your sight ever since you had gotten it.

You looked around and realized that you were indeed alone. While gripping the stick tightly in both your hands, you pushed yourself up from the hammock, leaning your entire body weight on the stick. Your legs trembled but you were able to remain standing for a few minutes until a sharp pain shot up your right leg and caused you to crumble down to the floor of the hut. Thankfully, it wasn’t that rough of a tumble with the stick catching you from most of your fall.

But you remained on the floor and gently sat the stick down next to you. Well, on the brighter side, at least you weren’t in your hammock anymore.

“Hi, Doc!” You looked up to find Spider standing in the doorway of your hut with a smile on his face. “Oh hey, look! You’re out of your hammock!”

Spider sank to the floor and crawled to sit next to you as you chuckled tiredly, “Yep. Makin’ progress each day, I guess.”

“Well, that’s good. That means you’re getting better.” Spider smiled encouragingly, patting your arm. All you could do was smile. Thankfully, Spider didn’t pick apart your expressions but instead his smile widened, “Oh! I brought a friend this time, Doc. Can he come in?”

At first you thought he was referring to another Na’vi kid that he had happened to befriend so you shrugged and nodded. Spider suddenly got up and rushed out the doorway, disappearing from your sight for a few seconds but you could still hear his voice as he said, “Okay! You can come in now!”

Spider came back seconds later and sat down in the spot he had been sitting in, bouncing excitedly.

The last person you expected to walk through that doorway was Norm Spellman.

“Norm?” You gapped up at him.

Norm looked stunned as well as he chuckled sheepishly, “Hey, Doc…long time no see.”

There really wasn’t any right way to react or say anything. Especially when it came to meeting someone you hadn’t seen…well…since after Grace’s death. It brought you back to too many memories all at once, overwhelming your senses to the point where you were just simply left speechless.

“So you guys know each other?” Spider asked, completely oblivious to the tension.

Norm cleared his throat awkwardly, “Um, Spider, why don’t you wait outside for a bit while Doc and I catch up?”

Spider frowned at him and then looked at you expectantly, almost as if he were waiting for you to give him the okay to leave you alone.

That had snapped you out of your stunned gaze long enough to give him a nod and a gentle pat on his head to reassure him further, “I’ll be fine, Parrot. I’ll let you know when you can come back, okay?”

“Okay.” Spider nodded and finally got up.

Norm watched the boy leave. The two of you were quiet for a few moments until he finally said, “Wow, you really are good with kids, huh? That kid barely listens to anyone.”

You shrugged, “Kids need someone to listen to them. It’s not too hard to do, I guess.” You couldn’t ignore the elephant in the room for much longer. Not with small talk. And you usually hate small talk with Norm. “I assume Spider told you about me—”

“Yeah, Y/N, he did.” Norm frowned. He stared at you as if it was the first time he had actually seen you. There was a look you hated that crossed his face, a look you did not particularly care for at the moment. Norm settled down on the floor but kept the space between you two as he continued in a quieter voice, “What, were you planning on staying here? In secret without anyone knowing?”

“I’m dying, Norm. What do you think?”

Norm winced, “But…Doc, we could’ve been there for you as soon as you woke up. Jake—”

“You didn’t tell Jake did you?” Was your quick response, your heart pounding against your chest in anxiety. “Norm, I can’t have him here, I can’t have him see me—”

“No, I didn’t tell him.” He stared at you in shock. “I wanted to be sure myself.  That I was about to see the Doc was actually the Doc we thought had died five years ago.” You dropped your gaze down to your bandaged knees, not wanting him to see your eyes become achy and then eventually glassy. “But now that I’m sure, now that I know you’re here…why can’t Jake know?”

You shook your head, scowling at him weakly, “I’m dying! What part of that do you not understand, Norm?”

“We can transfer your consciousness to your avatar, we’ve done it before with Jake—”

“I’m too weak—”

“No, you’re not, Y/N—”

“Grace was weak, Norm. She was dying and she never was able to cross over to her avatar!” Tears fell down your cheeks in despair. Your chest became tight and heavy at the same time.  “I can’t give him hope like that…I can’t…I can’t break his heart again…”

It was quiet once more in the hut. You could tell Norm was frustrated and this was one of the very reasons why you didn’t want him or anyone else you knew to see you. Not when you were slowly trying to accept the inevitable.

“We don’t have to tell anyone.” Norm started again, this time his voice was smaller. “I can have your avatar flown here. He doesn’t even have to know. And we can perform it here—”

“Norm—”

“They have a spirit tree or a tree of souls here too, don’t they? We could do it here and if it works we—”

You reached over and placed your hand on his shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze, “Norm, it’s okay. I’ll be fine.” Honestly, you were shocked you were able to say this despite the tears in your eyes, despite more of it falling down your face.

Norm shook his head but he didn’t respond right away. “I just…I just don’t know if I can go back and face him…knowing that I saw you.” You nodded understandingly but didn’t say anything else. And neither did he.

The two of you just sat in silence. You both were able to do that back when it was you, Norm, Grace, and Jake. Whenever Grace was busy or whenever Jake was in the link bed, you’d come out of your lab and just sit with Norm. You were either reading and he was eating something. And he never asked questions that much. It was nice. Those small moments.

Norm picked up your stick and examined it. You finally spoke, “How is he? Jake? You said…you said he was able to transfer his consciousness into his avatar.”

He chuckled, “Yeah, yeah he did. He’s also a family guy now, he and Neytiri have three kids now. It’s…it’s nice, you know, to see him happy.” Norm then looked up at you with a friendly smile, “But I think we both know it’s not the same without you, Doc.”

You chose not to respond to that, not to think about that. Because if you did, then there was no way you would ever stop crying. And you’ve already been doing a lot of that recently.

There was another pause of silence between you two. Norm handed you your stick and you took it, sending him a small smile, “I know we weren’t really close before, frankly, I don’t think I liked you in the beginning.” Norm snorted and you smiled. “But now I can say I find you mildly tolerable.”

“You find me tolerable now that you’re dying?” Norm scoffed, amusement twinkling in his eyes, “Should I be offended?”

“Don’t think about it too much.”

Norm nodded with a chuckle before standing up, “I’ll call Spider back in.”

“Hey, you can stay, you know.” You smiled not really wanting to be alone as of now. And as much as you’ve grown to love having Spider around, you would love to have another adult around—besides Dr. Chloe. “It’d kind suck that you’d come all this way just to go back in a few minutes.”

Spider came back in as Norm sighed, “I don’t know. I do have a lot of work to do at home.”

“No, stay!” Spider pleaded, tugging on the man’s arm. “You could help me with my Na’vi with Doc!”

Norm snorted, “I don’t know if I’m the best teacher to be honest.”

“What, after five years? Come on, Spellman.” You teased as Spider took his spot next to you again. “Sit with us for a while.”

There was still hesitation on his face, there was still what lingered from your conversation, Norm didn’t want to let it go, you could tell. Instead of addressing it in front of Spider, you gave him a look that told him he had to drop it. Honestly, you had forgotten how stubborn this guy was.

Reluctantly, he sighed and settled back down to the floor. “Okay, Spider. Show us what you’ve learned so far.”

And that’s what you spent most of the day doing. Spider was so excited that he was getting better at the language which meant he was steps closer. It also seemed like both Norm and Spider had a close bond with each other, which was nice to see. God, you may have hated Quaritch with all of your guts but it was good to know his son had some type of community around him, people that loved him and took care of him.

Thinking about this, it did make you wish that things were different. That you didn’t crash in that ship, that you didn’t go into cryosleep for five years, that you were with Jake…

By the time the evening came, Norm made his leave but Spider stayed with you. Since you decided to end your lessons, you let him go off about his time with his adoptive family. He mentions having a friend named Kiri who was also adopted and they were best friends because of that. You found it adorable and was happy that he had some Na’vi friends.

When the sun began to set, a horn sounded. Spider perked up both out of the sudden sound startling him and in curiosity. “What’s that?”

You remembered the ceremony that Dr. Chloe had mentioned before, “Why don’t we check it out?”

Spider nodded excitedly and helped you to your feet. The both of you slowly made your way out of the hut. It was the first time you had actually stood outside of the hut you had been staying in, only to find out that it was high up in a tree.

“Huh, that’s why the air’s always been a little bit thin.” You muttered as Spider helped you sit down on the wooden balcony with railings surrounding the hut. “Come on, let’s scoot toward the railing.”

You slowly scooted your body closer to the railing and carefully placed legs through the open spaces and you leaned your body against the bars. Spider copied you, swinging his legs back and forth.

Below you, you saw most of the Olangi Clan gather around further away from your tree. Most of them rode direhorses while the others walked next to them.

Both you and Spider watched as they moved slowly, practically gliding through the pathway of the trees. It looked as if the plants moved for them as they went or moved for the dead. Then in the middle of the long line of Na’vi, there was a large leaf that carried a single body which was also covered in leaves, and in that leaf along with the body were woodsprites.

“Look!” Spider pointed at the ones flying down and you stared at them in wonder.

You gently poked his shoulder, “What do you call them, Parrot?”

“Um, woodsprites?”

“Mhmm, but also…?”

Spider thought for a moment as one of them floated past his face. “Ooh! Atokirina'.”

He looked very proud of himself. And you laughed softly, “Very good.”

As you watched them walk, you got tired of staying upright for so long. Your body soon began to slump against the railing no matter how much you tried to stay still. “Hey, Spider, can you lean me up against the hut, please?”

Spider nodded and got up, “Are you okay?”

You nod after he helped you position yourself up against the wood of the hut, “Yeah, just a little tired.”

“Do you want me to get a healer?” Spider asked, kneeling down in front of you with a worried pout. “I can get my mom if you’d like! I know you don’t like Miss Parker.”

You furrow your brows, a smile tugging at your lips, “How do you know I don’t like Dr. Chloe?”

Spider shrugged, “You always looked annoyed whenever she came to see you. Oh, one time I even heard you say fu—”

“Okay, okay,” You stopped him. The last thing you wanted was to be responsible for turning this kid vulgar before he even reached his teens. “Yeah, go on and get your mother. Be careful while you do so, okay? We’re pretty high up.”

“They don’t call me Spider for nothing!” He grinned before running off. You watched what little you could see of him climb down the branches until he disappeared below and you couldn’t see him anymore.

For a moment, you took in the atmosphere. The peace. The night. The mourning of the dead. It took everything in you not to break down into tears yet again. God, you were such a  crybaby these days. You tried not to think about you being in that leaf instead, you tried not to think about Spider’s reaction if you were to die, you tried not to think about Jake, about whether Grace would be disappointed in you or not, you tried not to think so hard. You really did.

You hadn’t realized your eyes were closed until you opened them with a tear slipping out. Of course. So much for trying not to cry.

But your tears weren’t what you focused long on. Instead it was the woodsprite that suddenly floated down in front of you and landed on your right knee. You hadn’t seen one so up close before. From what you read about them, they are said to be very pure and scared spirits and that they don’t show up this often. So seeing one, and another float down toward you, made you begin to wonder…

Having them all around, you realized after a few seconds that a few more had landed on your body, was a bit of a bother. Especially, when it practically lit up your body for all to see. It was like it purposefully wanted you to be found or noticed by the Na’vi below.

Good thing no one was paying attention.

“Tsmuke?”

At first you thought you had imagined it. That you were just tired and should’ve been going to bed soon. But when you spotted movement in the corner of your eye, when you turned your head completely to find Neytiri squatting down on the railing, looking at you with just as much shock as you looked at her.

This had to be a dream. You had fallen asleep and you were dreaming. There was no way Neytiri was here, right now, in front of you.

You blinked when she dropped down onto the path where you sat and you muttered out, “Are you real?”

A grin broke out on Neytiri’s face as she rushed toward you and knelt down in front of you, “I prayed to the All Mother for this day! I knew you weren’t dead, ma tsmuke!” She pulled you into a tight hug. You, being too stunned to do anything else, hugged her back the best you could. “Thank you, Eywa, thank you, thank you, thank you! You’ve found her!”

All the emotions you had held back before, that you had pushed back the entire day after your conversation with Norm, came pouring out in quiet sobs that shook your shoulders. And you realized after a while of hugging her, Neytiri was crying too.

It felt…

It almost felt like being reunited with a family member you had missed. That you had lost. You never expected to reunite with Neytiri or Norm, but after you did, after you’ve hugged her, it was more of a relief than finding out that your side of the war had won.

Winning the war wasn’t worth it if you ended up alone in the end.

And god. God, you will finally admit that you hated being alone.

When you both pulled away, you found yourself speaking through your tears, “How did you…How are you here?”

“Sa’nok, the Tsahik was asked here to perform the ceremony.” Neytiri explained, placing her bow down. “She brought me here so that I can learn and be ready to become the future Tsahik…” She finally took in your current state and her smile fell slightly, “You are…”

You gave a pained smile, “I don’t really know how long I have. They, the humans, think they can heal me before I die but I don’t think they can—”

“No.” Neytiri shook her head immediately. “No. You cannot die. Not after I had just found you!”

“Neytiri—”

“What about Jake?” She whispered, tears filling her eyes. “What about Kiri? I can’t let you die, not without them seeing you.”

You shook your head, coming down from your momentary high to feel terribly exhausted. Worse than minutes before. “Neytiri it’s fine…” She helped you lay down on the floor, gently guarding your head as she did so. Your lower lip trembled, “I already know what you’re going to say and it won’t work.” You shook your head as Neytiri moved to protest, “It won’t work. I’m too weak.”

“I will not give up!” Neytiri hissed at you. “You and I…we had very little time together. But one thing I will always know, that would always be true, is that you belong with this family. You belong with Jake, you belong with little Kiri. You belong with all of us. You always have….” She sniffled, placing a hand on your forehead. “Sylwanin saw it before I did….and I am sorry it has taken me this long to realize it.”

You wanted to tell her you didn’t deserve it but something in you just couldn’t even push out the words. It just remained stuck in your throat. Stuck in your chest. Preventing the air from entering your lungs.

That’s when you realized you couldn’t breathe. That you had been trying to gasp for air.

Neytiri realized seconds after, “Tsmuke?” You felt her larger hands feel around your mask as if it had come loose. Black dots started to cover your vision. “Ma tsmuke!”

The last thing you remembered was Neytiri screaming and hands lifting your body from off the ground.

And then the world had gone dark. And you couldn’t hear her screams anymore.

taglist: @luvvfromme @sully-stick-together @jakesullylvr @s-u-t @ssc7514 @cheari @tojigirl @nyotamalfoy @perfectprofessorloverapricot @naityelen @dumb-fawkin-bitch @raggedyoldwitch @nhemmingsf @biooiuygjjgfsrb @thatsenoughformelol @thotd-f1 @beaniebeensbaby201 @theoriginalwife000 @3leni @23victoria @lovesickollie @atxara @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @ladylovegood-69 @lovekeeho @lilithmoon14512 @n7cje @fyfy-world @cleverzonkwombatsludge @goddesslilithmoriarty @itszzmoon @eternallyvenus @bajadotcom @ducks118 @alexandra-001

[wh0refornikolailantsov]

Prompt: I know my pain is such an imposition.

Song: You're Losing Me - Taylor Swift

For Kaz x Reader??

English is currently not my first language, incoherent screaming is.

Walk Away, Take My Heart With You - Kaz Brekker

Content Warnings: Angst. Heartbreak. Unhealthy Relationship And Communication Habits. Canon Complaint Violence And Threat. Not Beta/Proof Read.

Do I throw out everything we built or keep it? I'm getting tired even for a phoenix Always risin' from the ashes Mendin' all her gashes You might just have dealt the final blow

"Kaz are you even going to look at me?" You ask. Kaz doesn't, he keeps his eyes to the ground, walking in that consistent rhythm despite the pain it must cause him. That repeated tap of the cane on the cobblestones, a sound you hear in the back of your mind like a melody, you know you'll hear it even still when it becomes nothing more than a memory.

Stop, you're losin' me Stop, you're losin' me

"Kaz Brekker, stop right now," you say, stilting your own movements. You're walking the length of the harbour, and you're done chasing after him. You've done nothing wrong, not that you ever really have to get him riled up at you. He'd need to communicate with you why he is mad but he never seems capable of that.

Stop, you're losin' me I can't find a pulse

"I swear to the Saints Brekker if you don't stop and turn around now it is the last chance you'll get to do so," you snap, and your voice carries on the wind. He hears you, clearer than a gunshot and his walking stills, but he does not turn around. You don't move to meet him, you're done meeting him at a distance. There are so many things when it comes to Kaz that do not hurt you, things that you can tuck away and love him not in spite of but as well as. The fact he can never touch you, it leaves space for longing, for wishing, but it would never have you step away from him. His history, his demons, they don't scare you, and you know they should. You can love him, knowing all the reasons you've been told you shouldn't.

But this, this cold, unrelenting anger, this shutting you out and down and cutting you off without warning, without giving you the smallest clue as to what you've done, if you've even done anything at all. This is what is killing you.

There was a time when you thought there wasn't a thing in the world you wouldn't do for The Bastard Of The Barrel, but you've finally found your line, your limit, and you can practically hear Nina's voice in the back of your head telling you "it's about time."

"You do not give me orders," Kaz says and every other sound across the harbour is silenced. You are alone, painfully alone in the darkness, nothing around you and Kaz but the cannel and all the broken promises of hope between you. His words remind make something snap within you, and you realise once again, just how alone you truly are.

My heart won't start anymore For you 'Cause you're losin' me

"You know, Brekker," you say, staring at his siloutte in the dark, "one day I will have been gone long enough, I will have put enough distance between us, that I will forget your name, I will forget your face, I will forget each moment, each day, every single second spent with you. You won't even be a memory."

You don't mean it, you don't have the strength inside you to mean it, but you know if you don't walk away now, you're never going to, and you have given all the chances your heart can take on a man who doesn't want to love you, even if he does.

"I long for that day," Kaz says in return before continuing his path into the darkness. You should have expected nothing less. You should have expected worse. Kaz is filled to the brim with harsh words and cruel intentions. You've seen first hand everything he is capable of, you know exactly what he could do and why he would. But you had thought, you had let yourself believe that there was more between you than could be torn down with one bad mood and some words. But you're left in the harbour tying to pull yourself up from the stones like he has left you to bleed out on them.

And the air is thick with loss and indecision I know my pain is such an imposition

"I know Kaz can be... Kaz," Jesper is saying hovering around you throwing your stuff into a bag, "but you can't be leaving."

"I've been meaning to leave a long time now Jesper," you remind him.

"I thought you changed your mind," he says. You had. You had changed your mind, you had decided the barrel was your home, that what you had found here would be worth staying, that the world couldn't offer you what you have found at the bottom of the barrel. But you can't stay with your heart being target practice every time you pass a corner and expect to see him there.

Now, you're runnin' down the hallway And you know what they all say You don't know what you got until it's gone

"I can't stay," you tell Jesper, turning to face him. You try not to linger on how sad those eyes look, usually so filled with optimism. Jesper is scrambling to look for the right words but he comes up short.

"Look, I know none of us are great at... talking with each other," Jesper says, "but Kaz... I cannot imagine how he is going to be if you leave."

"It's not my responsibility to make him into someone who can talk to me Jesper," you say, "it's not my responsibility to fix him." You sigh, your bad feeling so heavy with the added weight of your pain. "I didn't want to fix him, I just... I wanted to believe that he loved me, but he can't be happy in the knowledge he does. It makes him angry, his feelings for me feel like a sickness to him, and I cannot stand around, loving him when him loving me makes him hate himself."

Jesper knows there is nothing to be said to that, he remembers the time he nearly brought down the Jam Tart House to nothing more than ashes when the Razergulls felt it a good idea to try and make a move on you as an act of violence against The Dregs, The Crows more specifically, and Kaz the most. Kaz had been all Dirtyhands that night, eyes like a shark smelling blood in the water, and violence that had the blood painted red. But when you'd arrived back at the slat, split lip and rope burned wrists you'd tried to thank him, but he had rebuffed you. Jesper could not understand the scowl on his face as Kaz had looked at you, for someone who had been willing to burn everything to the ground before he looked so inconvenienced by your presence. "Did you really think I’d be happy to see you?" was all Kaz had to say to you.

"I've forgiven him too many times already," you say, more to yourself than Jesper, "but there are only so many times someone can trespass against you before you realise that they don't see you as someone they need consider in their actions. I love Kaz, against every sensible fibre in my being, but I cannot love myself and love him at the same time, not with how he loves me now."

"I am going to miss you," Jesper says, leaning back on his heels.

"Jesper, I am going to miss you the most," you say, squeezing his arm, "don't tell the others."

Stop, you're losin' me Stop, you're losin' me Stop, you're losin' me

Kaz doesn't bother to look up as Jesper pushes his way into his office unannounced, having a very good idea what the intrusion is about not really wanting to engage in the conversation at all, especially with Jesper.

"You want them to leave," Jesper says.

"They will do whatever they want to do Jesper," Kaz says, "you should know that by now."

"You are pushing them away," Jesper says adamantly. "And that is... Boss I am going to speak out of turn."

"When don't you?" Kaz asks, finally bothering to look at him as he leans back in his chair.

"We are all broken Kaz,-,"

"Jesper do not presume to know anything about how I feel or what I think," Kaz cuts him off.

"Kaz, you can get as mad at me as you want, Saints fire me if you must, but hear me when I say, you do not want to do this."

I can't find a pulse My heart won't start anymore For you

You're back at the harbour, waiting now, waiting for something entirely different than the last thing you waited for on this stretch of stone. Your way out, instead of a reason to stay.

You brain is playing the memory of Kaz's steps that night over and over, the tap tap tap of his cane on the stone. "I've arranged you passage," comes Kaz's voice from behind you. The sound you now realise wasn't entirely in your mind.

"One good deed doesn't erase all the bad ones," you respond, not turning to look at him, scared to see him, scared that if you see him all your composure might fall away.

"I know," Kaz says, and his voice that is usually so steady, so laced with intent, is uncertain on its words.

"Why are you here Kaz?" you ask, keeping your eyes on the water.

"To make sure you leave," he says, wrapping his hand over the crow head of his cane, the tighter the grip the tighter his throat feels, the more he thinks he could drown in his own bitterness, right here next to the canal, and what an irony that would be.

'Cause you're losin' me 'Cause you're losin' me Stop (stop) 'cause you're losin' me

"I know my pain is such an imposition." You take a shuddering breath. "But I do not regret staying in Ketterdam, I need you to know that."

"Will you regret leaving?" he asks.

"Will you regret not asking me to stay?" you say in return before walking off, as he had that night, not giving you a chance to say anything in return, you pay him the same curtsey.

He stands there, watching you go. Jesper is right, of course he is right, and he knows that, and he doesn't doubt that deep down you know that too. But it isn't what matters. You need to leave, you need to be far away from Ketterdam, from The Barrel, from The Dregs, from him. You need to be somewhere where the world isn't threatening to pull every last piece of good from you at any given opportunity.

And for all his wants and his selfishness, if he has to make you hate him to ensure you leave, that is exactly the price he is willing to pay, even if you take the best parts of him with you as you go.

[straykids-97]

Scarlet

“When I am dead, I hope it may be said; his sins were scarlet but his books were read.” 

Yunho is a patient man, but sometimes you wear his patience thin…

Warnings: Dom!Yunho(like actually heh), use of toy(riding crop), unprotected sex, pet names/nicknames, dom/sub dynamics, smut, also soft Yunho at the end Word Count: 3.1k

You met Yunho through mutual friends. At first, you were shy, Yunho was way out of your league. All the girls wanted him, but for some reason, he never brought anyone home. He hardly afforded them much attention either. He was the perfect gentleman, always so nice. 

Until he met you.

He hardly spoke around you, at first you thought he didn't like you. Then gradually, he began to open up. He was adorable, and he was so blushy when the two of you talked for longer than 10 minutes. It made you melt, it was clear that the two of you were attracted to one another. But you were too shy to say something to him, not that you needed to. Yunho knew. He always knew.

When Yunho finally asked you out, no one was shocked. You two were perfect for each other. But there was something different about Yunho, you noticed. He didn't seem to eat or sleep, and after a few months, you finally confronted him. The answer you got wasn't what you expected. In fact, you thought he was joking. But, he wasn't. 

But it made sense. Why was he so alluring. Why everyone was so drawn to him? Why he was so charismatic? It was because Yunho was a vampire. 

That was his deepest, darkest secret, well one of them. Perhaps his second one was that he desired control over you. He wanted complete and total submission from you, in every way possible. You knew he was ‘kinky’ but the night he dangled those keys in front of your face changed your future. You were apprehensive at first, it was a lot to take in. After all, he had quite the collection of things. 

He quietly watched you from afar, observing, waiting for the moment you had a question. Yunho immediately gave you a synopsis of what you picked up, no matter what it was. Ranging from its uses of it, to where it originated from. Even before you opened your mouth, Yunho was immediately answering the question you had. He wanted to share this part of his world with you. Even if that meant waiting for you to catch up to speed. And he had all the time to wait for you. You both had a discussion about what you wanted and didn’t want, and Yunho was wholly understanding that this was all new to you. After all, he didn’t want to push you away. Yunho very rarely chose a sub, let alone a sub who knew his secret. 

After a while, he learned that maybe if you had the opportunity to explore the room alone, you’d be more open and honest. Figuring that you may be more comfortable if you had the chance to explore without him around. So Yunho allowed you the keys and told you to feel free to go through everything and anything while he was gone. “Call or text me if you have any more questions.” He gave you a soft smile and left you to your own devices. 

You stood in front of the dark door, fidgeting with the keys for a few moments. You bite your lip apprehensively, take a deep breath and finally unlock the door. You were greeted with the smell of wood cleaner and Yunho. His scent was all over this room; he did admit he spent a lot of time in there. You walk toward the ‘whipping wall’, as you called it. Yunho found it adorable that you were naming the things in his playroom. But he couldn’t deny the fitting name. The wall was covered by things that all hung on hooks; from canes to tickling devices, Yunho really had one of everything. You were intimidated by the more brutal-looking devices and opted to look more closely at the less lethal-looking ones. 

You were most fascinated with the whips and flogs, heat filling your cheeks and neck as you run your fingers over the riding crop. Maybe Yunho would use it on you one day. The thought made your legs clench. You clear your throat, trying to rid yourself of the heat you felt suddenly. You keep moving through the room for a while and decide that you were done exploring. You leave the room and make sure to lock it. Carefully put the keys back where they belong and go to the door, texting Yunho that you were going home for the evening. He texted back immediately and told you to travel safely. He followed it with a, ‘I’ll call you as soon as I’m through with this business.’ 

You catch a taxicab and ask to stop by the store before heading home. You remembered that there were something’s you needed to grab before getting home, and maybe grab something for dinner while you shop. You were dropped off at a store a few blocks away from where you lived; a good thing if you couldn’t find a taxi later. But you dreaded if you didn’t. 

After leisurely browsing the aisles for the list of items you needed, your phone buzzes. Yunho texted you; any kinks I should know about Princess? 

You gasp to yourself, sensing your legs clench. It surprised you that even now his dominant side was prevalent. Yunho explained that it was all involuntary because of what he was and that he was just used to making women feel this way. Even if it was on accident. Nonetheless, his question caught you off guard and you think that replying to his text while in public wasn’t appropriate so you leave it alone for now. You carry on throughout the store, calming yourself and preparing for that call Yunho promised you later. Lord knows you needed it. Yunho was very convincing sometimes, and who knows what he had planned for later… You gather yourself and finally check out. Surely enough after some trying, you managed to find another taxi to make it home before it got too late. 

Sighing as you walk down the hall to your apartment door, you pull your keys out and let yourself in, kicking the door closed with your heel. You release yet another sigh as you kick your shoes off, struggling with your bags as you managed to semi-safely get out of your shoes. You tread into your kitchen to put your food away, not noticing the figure sitting in your lounge chair until you hear the lamp click on. 

You freeze; heart skittering to a stop. You knew that sound very well, the lamp that was beside your chair… The one you spent hours sitting by the window with a book, cuddled up as Yunho watched from the safety of the darker side of the apartment. That lamp.

Slowly turning to see who let themselves into your apartment, you only see a figure. Their face darkened, the light of the lamp positioned just right to reveal only a silhouette. They’re wearing a black dress shirt, unbuttoned enough to reveal a broad chest. Those familiar collarbones were on display for you and only you. Their lithe legs were covered by tailored slacks that squeezed their thighs deliciously. And spread just enough to make your pulse race. His feet were bare, something that he had revealed many weeks ago that he only does when he’s in his ‘space’. Yunho explained that it gave him a better grip on the floor when he was in his playroom because the floor was wooden. But the thing that held your interest was a thin, hard riding crop that slowly and rhythmically tapped his thigh. His opposing hand held his head, his scarlet eyes watching you intensely. 

For a moment, neither of you says a word as you scrutinize each other. Yunho’s beautiful eyes scanned your flushed features for a while until they landed back on your face. He splits the silence with a deep drag, “Didn’t reply.” His hoarse voice rumbled, making you jump slightly. It wasn’t loud, or even stern. His words almost sounded like a cat purring, and it sent shivers down your spine. “I-I was at the store.” Your voice broke at the end, making Yunho chuckle. “Why don’t you say it now, hmm?” He smacked his thigh once; the loud sound made you jump again. He held the riding crop up to his nose, moving it down the whip part of the crop until it landed on the clap, “Or maybe this speaks enough for you…” He runs his nose back along the riding crop, inhaling where your fingers danced earlier. “You dawdled on this one longest…” He drew away, his eyes regarding you carefully. “Come here.” 

You waver for a moment too long and he slowly rises to his feet. “We’re in the space…” he trails off, referring to you two, “where you don’t get to disobey me.” His voice grows deeper as he hisses the end, his teeth baring at you. Your legs become goo instantly as you sink to your knees. Your eyes fall to the ground, remembering everything Yunho expected from you when you two played. You watch his feet appear in your vision and he stops in front of you. “Hairtie?” He requests. You hold your wrist out for him to pull the elastic off of your appendage. He moves behind you and pulls your hair backward, running his hands through it before quickly and expertly braiding it. Yunho hums a song to himself that vaguely sounds like Often, by the Weekend. 

He takes a deep breath and wraps the long braid around his hand and yanks your head backward to look into his scarlet eyes. You mewl, heat spreading through your belly. “Crawl to the chair.” His voice was sharp, piercing your core and making your legs shake. Somehow he always makes it sound so alluring as if he was a walking sex God. The second he drops your braid you instantly do as you were told, pausing only when you were a few feet away from the edge of your sitting chair. You sink back onto your calves and wait for your next demand. 

Your heart was sprinting; Yunho could hear it. It made him want to pounce on you, devour you right then and there but he had to take his time. You were new to all of this. Quite frankly, he didn’t care for playing. He just wanted to toss you onto your couch and rip all your clothes off and- 

“Take your clothes off.” Yunho ordered. You sit there, unsure if you could stand yet. “May I stand, sir?” Your voice was soft and fragile, making Yunho groan softly. “Yes. Once you are done, back to your knees babydoll.” He approved of your memory; only calling him by his preferred play names, ‘Sir’ and ‘Daddy’. Yunho moved around you to sit in the chair, spreading his legs so that you were now in between them. His scarlet eyes watch your every movement, even the rise and fall of your chest. He most enjoyed the quickening of your pulse as you shifted, realizing what you were about to do for him. He was struggling to maintain his composure... 

You shudder knowing that he was observing you strip, making you feel a little self-conscious. You had never done this before, stripping for someone that is. Or really anything that Yunho had planned for you, whatever it was. But you hoped he used that crop on you. Your thoughts cause you to bite your lip, and Yunho grins like a cat, “Penny for your thoughts, baby?” You shake your head, too embarrassed to say what you were thinking. Yunho chuckles, “A loss, for certain.” He drops it and continues to eye you as your fingers make quick work of your clothes. After a few moments, just as you were about to take your panties and bra off, Yunho holds his hand up, causing you to glance at him. “Leave those…” He trails off, his eyes shamelessly racking up your body until they landed on your face. Your cheeks heat up as he sucks his bottom lip between his teeth, surely puncturing them with his sharp incisors. “Come here.” He taps between his legs with the crop, and your feet carry you to stand closer to him. “Bend over my lap.” You gasp at his demand but still obey. It was like your body was not your own, but an appendage of Yunho’s. Yunho really was struggling now. You were being so good to him. He wanted to give you the whole fucking world, even if he had to make it burn just for you. 

You lean over his lap, breasts pushing up as you lean over the arm. Your ass was stuck up in the air and Yunho took full advantage of the opportunity, grabbing a handful. “If you ever feel ashamed of your body, I’ll spank it out of you. Your a damn Goddess, y/n.” He purrs. After a few seconds, a harsh slap rang out into your tranquil apartment. “Yunho!” You choke, head whipping to peer at him. A cunning, seductive grin spreads across his features as he raises his hand to deliver yet another strike, his eyes holding yours as his palm connects with the other cheek. You yelp, your mouth dropping open as your skin warms up, the interaction between the two of you making you feel fuzzy as if your body was responding to his. Yunho quirks an eyebrow as he rests the crop on your backside, “Ordinarily,” he cocks his head as his free hand holds your chin, “I would make you look away. But,” he runs the crop between your asscheeks to your soaked core, making you whine, “I want you to look at me.” He delivers a soft quick pat to your clothed clit, making you pant. 

You try to close your legs but Yunho’s foot prevented you from doing that. You didn’t even notice that his leg was wrapped around yours until then. He had you pinned to his lap, and the thought of him not letting you go made your pulse race. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, “The fragrance that you emit when you get horny makes me want to fucking eat you alive, y/n.” he reopened his eyes to reveal his eyes burning a brighter scarlet. “Yunho-” you begin to say but he stops you. “Sir.” He corrects, using the crop to spank you. The sting was sharper but didn’t last as long as when he used his hand. Your legs begin to shake as he spanks you three more times. “Do you like this, Princess?” You nod frantically, panting as your core clenches around nothing. No one had ever made you feel this way. You whimper when you realize that he had stopped. You begin to think you’ve done something wrong, but what you didn’t know was that you had made him snap. 

He had you on your back, pinned to your carpeted floor in seconds. He didn’t speak as he burst the buttons of his dress shirt, ripping at the seams to get it off of him. Yunho’s mouth latched to yours, his right hand holding your jaw as his other peeled his pants off. Your mind was churning, jumbled with thoughts of what he was about to do to you. Yunho and you had only had sex twice but he seemed to be holding back, but not this time. He was going to give you what you deserved and deal with the consequences later. Yunho wanted to use you. Wanted to eradicate any hope of anyone that may come after him, but the thought of anyone else with you made him growl, there would be no one else. He would ruin you so completely that there could be no one after him, ever. And now that he knew you were just like him, he knew he was fucked in more ways than one. 

There was another shredding sound and your panties joined his ruined shirt a few feet away. He pulled your bra down enough to expose your breasts, making him hiss. His mouth latched around your nipple making you cry out, his teeth sinking into your flesh. But his tongue was quick to lap up the blood that spilled out, filling you with even more passion. You groaned, running your hand through his hair as he thrust into you, both of you groaning with bliss; he filled you so completely that it was as if he was made just for you, and you for him. He groaned as he began to fuck you into the floor, the sound of flesh meeting flesh was pornographic. You prayed that your neighbors couldn’t hear, not that you cared at the moment. 

Yunho’s scarlet eyes met yours, agitating with hunger and desire, and he buried his face in your neck. “I could fucking mark you right now.” he moaned, “no one will want you then. You’ll be all mine. No one elses.” You wail at his words, nails digging into his back as he fucked you harder. “Mine. Mine.” he growls, baring his teeth at you, gripping your jaw. “Yours.” You blubber. Yunho’s mouth falls open and a moan emits from the back of his throat. “Say it again.” he demands, thrusts getting shallow. Your mouth falls open, feeling your orgasm getting close. “Yu.” you plead, holding his shoulders as he goes faster. “Fuck, please say it again.” Dom Yunho was gone. He didn’t care anymore. He just wanted you to say that you were his again. 

“Yu, I’m- I’m all yours!” Your eyes roll into the back of your head as he grinds against you, the tip of his dick rubbing the gooey spot inside of you. “Yu!” You cry out as your shatter. You tuck your head into his neck, holding him closer as you cry into his throat. He holds you as his hips stutter and he stops, letting out a throaty groan. For a moment you stay like that, unmoving. Well, apart from the shaking of your body as you came down from your high that was, you didn’t move.

Yunho pulls away and looks at your tear-stained cheeks. His thumb catches a stray one as it rolls down your face, “Are you ok?” He questions. You nod feebly as he gazes down at you with something akin to adoration maybe even love. Yunho offers you a soft smile as he pulls away, helping you to your feet. You were feeling tired as he holds you steady, “Do you want to lie down or take a bath?” He sweeps you off your feet and awaits for you to reply. “Bath.” You reply, curling into his chest finding solace in his warm body. Yunho carries you down your hallway to your bathroom, humming something that you didn’t recognize as he enters the bathroom. 

Yunho finally found what he had been looking for for nearly 300 years; someone to spend his forever with.

Taglist: @anyamaris @vibessonvibes @s3onghwaswifey @whatudowhennooneseesyou

Working on cherry as we speak! As I work most weekends, it probably won't be up until Monday :( anyway, enjoy this utter filth for now you animals <3 plz lmk if you want to be tagged!

©️straykids-97

[itwasthereaminuteago]

|| Move Me ||

Matt Murdock x gender neutral reader

Tags/warnings: dancer reader and boxer/DD Matt. slight angst but mostly lovely fluff.

A/N: this is for the March TFC writing challenge with the prompt "Oh, I'm sorry. Was that too much?" heavily inspired by Movement by Hozier which I've listened to so much recently.

You had found Fogwell's gym through your friend's dad, somewhere that was close by and cheap enough that you could practice for your dance exam final and didn't mean you were missing out on dinners for half the week.

When you first tentatively pushed open the door the smell of stale sweat met your nose and you could hear the soft huffs and grunts as a boxer worked out on the bag. He was focused and unrelenting, and doesn't notice you coming in and you find yourself watching him for a few minutes.

He's not the busted up, heavy set kind of guy that you might have expected to find in a place like this. No, he was lean, his strength and power clear as day, the loose vest he was wearing was soaked with sweat and showing off his upper body as he hit the bag with a flurry of punches.

You put your stuff down to change out of your street shoes and the thumping stops, the silence only permeated by his soft panting of breath.

"Hi." He says brightly. "You must be the dancer?"

"Oh, hi, yeah. I'm sorry I didn't mean to disturb you!" You manage to stutter out as you look up at him and see that he's gorgeous. His eyes are a deep, warm brown and you notice that they never exactly meet yours.

"You didn't, just taking a breather." He says, smiling in your direction.

"I'm uh, just gonna use the ring for my practice. I promise I won't get in your way." You assure him, and he does this thing where he tilts his head, raising a brow as he follows your voice. It's cute.

"Sure, no worries." He smiles again, a little wider this time, "I'm Matt."

"Hi, Matt." You reply and introduce yourself before ducking into the ring and putting your earbuds in.

Yeah, Matt was gonna be a distraction for sure.

Matt carries on with his training, the sound of his punches and kicks interspersed with the soft sweep and swish of your body as you start to move across the sprung floor.

A dancer and a boxer. You had more in common than you thought.

Five nights a week you find yourself in Fogwell's, sometimes there's one or two other people training on their own, but he is there all the time. Every night you respond politely to his cheerful hello, then you both get on with your routines. You always wore earbuds when you were practicing, not wanting to disturb the few boxers from their own rhythms.

"I just wondered, there's plenty of dance studios around the city, do you mind if I ask why you come here?"

His question makes you look up from the floor where you're warming up.

"Well, for one it's a lot cheaper, but mostly I feel better knowing that no-one here is watching me fuck up all the time." You smile and he nods, realising that you already noted his impairment. He was usually here when you arrived and you were gone before he left so you had never seen him using his cane but he guessed it was otherwise obvious.

Despite that fact, Matt could always feel the shift in pressure as you crossed one foot over the other into a seamless turn, your arms extending outwards before pulling back in and down your body. He could feel you move, and he thought you moved beautifully.

He tilts his head to one side. "Forgive me, but you're all dance students right? I'm sure that they fuck up sometimes too?"

You swallow, your mouth suddenly very dry. You loved dancing, couldn't stop yourself from embellishing a walk down the street with a spin, swaying along with the trees in the park, or choreographing in your head when you were on the train. But despite that you so often doubted yourself, got anxious and felt sick when you knew people were actively watching you perform. But you were trying to work on it, trying to find some way of dealing.

"Yeah, I guess I'm just a little more uh, self conscious about it than they are..."

Matt nods softly, aware of your slight anxiousness. "I'm pretty sure you've got nothing to worry about." He assures you, and maybe you open yourself a little to believing it.

Sometimes you swore Matt was watching you. The way he'd place his palms to steady the swing of the punching bag and pause there, his head cocked and fingers gently tapping along in sync to the beat that you only thought you would be able to hear in your earbuds. But it was impossible, he was blind, and despite what people say about the other senses making up for those lost, no one could hear that well…

The next session, you say your usual short hellos and small talk when you're sitting on the bench tying your shoes he speaks again, his soft easy voice a caress to your ears.

"You know it's just me, or uh, us here tonight. We've got the place to ourselves."

You look across at him and nervous butterflies start swirling in your stomach. "Oh…really, I um…"

Matt realises that it sounded like a come on and quickly adds- "What I meant was, there's a Bluetooth speaker over there that you can play your music through. If you wanted to."

You find yourself almost disappointed that it wasn't a line after all. You'd grown comfortable with him being there, you would even say you actually looked forward to your practice time because of him.

"Oh! That would be really great, but you're sure it won't disturb you?"

"Not at all. It'd be great to hear some music in here for a change."

You smirk, "well it might get a little annoying, hearing the same track over and over, so just let me know when you get sick of it."

Matt shakes his head. "I'm thinking it might be meditative for me, maybe give me something to focus on." Something that's not the way your heart flutters when you look at me. Matt thinks to himself.

You move over to the shelf the speaker is sitting on and set it up on your phone, skipping to the end of the track so that you can get in place before it loops and starts again. Matt resumes his training and you continue like that for the rest of the week, sharing the space but doing your own thing.

In the second week after a couple of hours you crash down onto the floor with a frustrated groan, flopping onto your back and hammering your fists against the mat in annoyance.

"Are you okay?" Matt asks with concern. You let out a heavy sigh.

"Ugh, yeah. It's just.. I can't get this section to flow, it's all wrong and I can't think of what else to do with it!"

"You've been at it for ages. Maybe take a break, clear your head?" Matt gestures at the bag. "Here, you can come and punch this for a while, I promise it'll help."

You heave yourself up, suddenly feeling energised at the thought of spending some time with him. "Okay, but I don't really know how to punch."

He steps aside, giving you space when you climb down between the ropes of the ring and stand beside him. "Make a fist?"

You close your hand into some approximation of a fist, frowning as it looks wrong. "Uh, is that right? Can you show me?"

Matt clears his throat. "Sure. Um, do you mind if I…" he holds out his hand for yours and you give him it, holding your breath as his warm hands carefully manipulate your fingers into the correct position.

"So you don't break anything." Matt explains, and gives your hand a quick squeeze now that you've got it.

"Thanks." He hears the smile in your voice as you bounce a little on the balls of your feet like you've seen him do when he's training.

"Alright you're all set, throw your arm out from the shoulder, and try to imagine you're hitting out beyond your fist. Now, just give it your best shot!"

You take a deep breath and lash out at the bag with a yell, making it shake on the chain. although not as much as when Matt does it. Still, you're pleased, and seemingly he is too. He listens as you land another few hits, and you're both grinning as your frustration melts away.

"Shit, I would not want to get into a fight with you, I could tell that was a decent punch!"

"Do you fight? Like with other people, sparring and stuff?" You ask him, and he scratches the back of his neck, feels the constant ache in his body.

"Uh yeah, sometimes." Every single night.

"Teach me how to kick?" You ask, and he nods, loving how curious and eager you are to learn.

He demonstrates the kick a few times, striking out with the lower part of his shin hitting the side of the bag and then it's your turn, but you're not sure if you're doing it right.

You watch carefully as he does it slowly this time, the muscles of his thigh and calf so strongly defined as they tense, and he thumps into the bag.

You try again, putting more force into it this time and somehow he senses you're unbalanced and reaches out, catching you gently before you nearly fall over.

"Whoops, heh careful!" His face lights up as he smiles, righting you and you laugh as you regain your balance. "It's much harder to do slow."

"Yep, just like dancing!" You try again but you're not satisfied.

"Do you think… would you mind, maybe if you move me with your hands, you would be able to tell what I'm doing wrong? I'm just not sure-"

What are you doing?? You scold yourself.

"Uh yeah, of course. Let me just-" he moves to the side behind you, placing his left hand on the outside of your hip and his right ready to catch under your leg just above your knee when you swing it out.

"Okay, so make sure you're turning your hip into the kick, like this." He pushes on you gently, guiding your movement so you get the rotation and your shin contacts square on.

"Oh!"

"There, you've got it, you're a natural!"

When you're back standing on both feet his hand is still resting on your hip. Your face heats up and you're so glad he can't see how hard you're blushing but he hurriedly lifts it away as if he's been burned by the heat of your skin.

"Try a few on your own?" He suggests, stepping back to give you more space. You find yourself missing the contact with him but you kick the bag again and it feels good.

"Thank you so much Matt, that really did help." You climb back into the ring and take a huge gulp of water trying to calm the buzzing high you feel from being so close to him.

"I'm glad it did, and honestly, anytime. I'll uh, let you get back to it."

"Thanks," you say, stretching your arms before you start back on your choreography. "Maybe I could teach you some moves sometime… uh, dance moves that is!" You blurt out, the heat rising to your face yet again, but Matt is nodding with a genuine smile.

"I'd really like that."

You find the conversation between you flowing even easier after that, Matt's easy to talk to and you never feel under any pressure to be anything but yourself when he's around.

On Monday night you arrive at the gym and the door is locked. You have a key but had never had to use it yet as Matt was always there before you. But not tonight. You switch on the flickering lights and get ready to go through your routine, but it feels lonely without him in the room and you wrap up much earlier than normal.

The next evening the door is open when you get there and you're glad to see Matt's sitting on the bench. He's hunched over and the loose tail of his hand wraps dangles from his fingers onto the floor.

"Hey, get up to anything fun last night?" You try your best to keep it casual, but you can't help your mind wondering if he had been on a date or something.

He looks up and it's then that you see the deep cut across his brow and the dark blooming bruises on his arms and legs.

"Oh Matt! Are you alright?" You rush over, kneeling down in front of him. He's surprised as you gently brush his hair from his face, hearing your heart rate increase with worry as you check him over.

"It's okay, it's nothing really."

You knew there was a first aid kit in the toilets and you hurried to retrieve it, sitting down again in front of him, taking out some antiseptic and a cotton ball.

"It's not nothing. Here, hold still for me?" He winces a little as the alcohol stings as you carefully dab it along the opening. He can't help marvel at how determined you are to take care of him as you close up the cut with a couple of adhesive strips. Your fingers graze along his stubbled jaw as you turn his head from one side to the other making sure there was nothing else that needed tending, and when you let go Matt finds himself wanting to chase after your touch.

"Okay, I think that's better. I've got some arnica for the bruises at home, I'll bring it tomorrow."

"You're an angel. Thank you." He says, and just like that your confidence wanes, and you feel the heat flooding your face again as you pack the medical supplies away.

"So, what happened? Did you get into a fight?"

Matt considers lying, telling you that yeah, it was a fight with the stairs and they won, but he finds he can't, doesn't want to.

He sighs. "Yeah. I- I just made a stupid mistake. But you should see the other guy." He tries making light of the situation even though he's feeling miserable, but you don't laugh. It doesn't take a psychic to know that there was something more going on, but you weren't going to press him.

"Maybe you shouldn't be here tonight Matt, you should go home and get some rest." Your heart tugs at his lost expression, you really don't like seeing him like this. You just wish you could do something to make it better.

He fiddles with the shredded end of the wrap, picking at the loose thread. "I, uh, came in because I didn't really want to be alone."

He's silent for a beat and then…

"Would it be okay if maybe I could… just listen to you dance?" Then he shakes his head and goes to get up, dismissing the request. "No, no sorry that's just… weird. Nevermind just-"

You stop him in his tracks, your hands on his shoulders and a soft smile on your lips. "Hey, it's not weird. And last night, when you weren't here… I kinda missed having the company."

You see the corner of Matt's mouth tug up just slightly and it fills you with warmth. "Yeah?"

"You're one of the best audiences I've had." You tell him, and it raises a small chuckle.

"Thank you."

"Of course."

You run through your routine and your heart skips as every time you steal a glance at Matt, he looks lighter and happier.

Matt feels his mood lift almost immediately as you pad across the floor of the ring, turning, stretching and moving your body so gracefully in time with the music. He feels your gaze and smile on him, and he's grateful. You've brought something into his life he didn't even know he was missing.

The end of the fourth week comes round so quickly and it's your last session. Your exam is on Saturday morning but you feel ready, ready to face a room of examiners and the other students. You know exactly how you're going to get through it, how you'll beat your nerves and anxiety. All you have to do is imagine that you're performing right here and it's only the two of you. Just you and Matt.

"Dance with me." You say, at the end of your run through, as Matt kicks the bag and it nearly knocks him over as it swings back as he hears your request.

"What?"

You laugh at his sudden adorable awkwardness. "Dance with me! I said I'd teach you some moves, and you seemed kinda keen before…"

Matt grins and starts peeling off his wraps. "I am. Just don't hate me if I step on your toes."

You laugh as he joins you in the ring and you come to stand facing him. "You won't."

"Alright, so… give me your hands?"

He holds them out and you place them on your hips. His touch is light but keeps perfect contact with you as you slowly swing your hips out, around and back in a figure of eight. Your heart is racing a mile a minute.

"You feel that?" You ask, and his tongue darts out to wet his lips. You've got to know what you're doing to him.

"Yeah."

"Now you try." You can't help laughing a little as he moves slightly stiffly at first, but when you put your hands on his hips to guide him the movements very quickly smooth out and you're impressed.

"Okay good, now you're gonna step forward to me with your right foot while I step back, and then your left goes back and my right forward, and layer on that movement with your hips. Does that make sense?"

Matt smiles and lets you lead him for a few steps then falters a bit and stops. "Shit, I'm sorry, told you I'd mess up."

You grin, "don't worry, but it might be easier if we're a bit closer?"

He nods and your heart is now thumping in your chest so hard that you swear he must hear it as he holds you so you're pressed to him. You can feel the heat of his body, smell the light sweat from his workout, and you're giddy with it all.

Matt can't even hear the hard pattering of the rain on the plate glass window over the dominant sound of your heart, and he doesn't want to. It's a beat he would dance to forever, but you'll be gone after tonight and he'll probably never see you again, so he tries to just savour this moment, to get lost in it as he follows your body, the way you move and move him. You're light and soft, but simultaneously grounded and strong. As you start to gently sway back and forth, he closes his eyes and goes wherever you want to take him.

"You're a natural, Matt." Your voice is barely a whisper as he moves a hand to your mid back and your own slides up to lay on his shoulder. Your free hands join, fingers interlocking as you start to lead him around the ring and he follows you effortlessly, in contact the whole time, the two of you moving as one as if you had been partners for years.

You feel so lightheaded as you dance together, becoming more daring with your steps but he always follows. You hum and laugh as he lets you spin out from his arms and then reels you back in again.

When you lean backwards he's got you, supporting you easily as you let your upper body arc around in a half circle dip and then he guides you back upright. With your face now only inches from his you notice, and not for the first time, how pretty his lashes are, laying soft against the tops of his cheeks, how full and pink his lips look, as his tongue slips out to moisten them.

He feels your sweet halted breath fan over his face as you both wait for something.

It's Matt that speaks first.

"Good luck tomorrow, for your exam, but I'm sure you'll be amazing."

You're amazing.

You move and he moves, your face tilting up towards him as his fingers gently tip your chin, your lips brushing chastely as he kisses you so softly you could melt into the floor.

With your foreheads leaning against each other and your breathing shallow, you both pause. You're unable to keep the smile from your face.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Matt says in quiet apology, "was that… too much? I didn't mean to-"

You beam even harder, your fingers stroking the side of his face. "No Matt, it was perfect, and I'll let you know how it goes."

He looks up then, head tilting to the side. "You will?"

"Yeah, say... tomorrow afternoon? Maybe over coffee?" You suggest, unable to hide the glee in your voice and the butterflies in your stomach as you ask him out.

Matt grins, the pad of his thumb running small circles over your knuckles as he's still holding your hand in his. "Tomorrow? I, yes… yeah. I'd like that a lot!"

Tags: @saintmurd0ck @mindidjarin @castlesnchurches @peterman-spideyparker @pastafossa @mattmurdocksscars @mattmurdockspainkink @marvelswh0re @munsonownsmyass @officialjanetsnakehole

@hellskitchenswhore @pedrito-friskito @sweetieswiftie @briefcasejuice @shedaresthedevil @freshabogados @e-dubbc11 @father4giveme @idrinkcoffeeandobsess @imperfxctly-me @stress--relief @murnsondock @stupidthoughtsinwriting @whistle1whistle @tea-and-wine @emiemiemiii @imherefordeanandbones @m0nster-fvcker @creatingjana @echos-muses @lazyxsquirrel

[hollys-fairy-hell]

Prompt:

Dev finds out why Peri doesn’t use a human disguise

Got an outline idea for it under the cut. Didn’t mean for it to get quite as lengthy but im tired so I kept typing. Feel free to use my prompts but please tag me or send me a link cause I would love to see what you do. This should be in my bio not this post

Imagine with me now. Dev still has Peri pre final. And sees Wanda and Cosmo in human form a lot but never once Peri? Hazel has something je doesn’t and that can’t stand. Not wanting to embarrass himself in front of Hazel (i imagine this kid cares a lot about his image) he waits to confront Peri about it later.

“Peri why don’t you ever go into a human form? Or body? Or mode? Or whatever! Hazel gets to flaunt her fairies to everyone while you always hide!”

Peri in his usual fashion gets rather nervous and refuses to make eye contact with Dev. “Well Dev you see I uhh” his hands fidgeting with his wand. It’s not that he doesn’t know how or no human form picked out. “It’s just um that it’s.” Dev cuts off before he can even figure out what hes gonna say next “whats the hold up? Come on do it!” Imagine Dev doing a little stop with his foot. Peri winces and then turns to Dev with a forced smile “I don’t really think it’s-“ Only to be cut off by Dev with a loud annoyed groan “why am I even bothering with this “I wish you would turn into your human form! or whatever it is, human disguise!” At this Peri winces, gives a soft sign as he raises his wand there was a spider trying to crawl onto my face while writing this and with a poof of smoke presents him self as human.

Insert you idea of human Peri

With a little thunk of his shoes hitting the floor Peri stands there. Eyes blink a few times as he turns to look down on Dev “taadaa” he unenthusiasticly waves his arms over himself as if sarcastic. “There you go kid. My human form. Satisfied?” Dev gave him a look up and down. Peri shuffling a bit on the spot. Switching his weight. Dev began to walk around Peri as if inspecting like a new product searching him for a flaw “I don’t know what I expected. You just as lame as always but taller. He finished circling Peri, and with a final look he starts walking to the door.

Only to stop when he noticed Peri wasn’t following “well?” He turns back and looks at Peri. He sees Peri turn back into a fairy and start to float towards Dev. “No not like that! As a human!” A slight shocked look comes iver Peris face and is quickly replaced with defeat as he lifts his want to turn back into his disguise. Dev then waves his hand for Peri to follow. Peri Who is standing on the spot fidgeting with his hands a bit “listen Kid, my human disguise isnt really something I like walking around in. Or being in at all for a matter of a fact cause it’s rather pai-“ Dev once again cutting him off “it’s not even hard! Arent you supposed to be helping me? Can’t even do this one simple thing on your own?? It’s like I have to do everything by myself!” He huffs. Peri starts to respond but Dev speaks up first “I w~ish you would walk over here already!”

With a deep breath Peri uses his wand as a cane and leans on it heavily as he slowly trudges to where Dev is waiting. A slight wince in each step but he makes it there. Dev of course is unimpressed with this display “What was that? It’s just walking! It’s like the easiest thing in the world to do!” Another deep breath ‘following in your parent’s footsteps you got this.’ Peri tries to look Dev in the eye, though the sunglasses don’t help. “You know how easy it is for you use your tablet? A lot of kids or even adults struggle with technology on the level that you do everyday. But for me when it comes to walking, even though it’s easy and natural for a lot of people, it’s different. Imagine if every time you took a step your shoes are two sizes smaller. Or you have a very heave backpack on. Thats kinda what it’s like for me.” Trying his best to hopefully get Dev to understand. But the kid scoffed and crossed his arms “my shoes are always the right size and I don’t have to carry anything ever.” Thinking about it Peri had to agree “yeah I guess you are right. I don’t think I have seen you really carry much…. But thats not the point. The point that I am trying to make is walking in my human disguise, or even just as a fairy, is rather different for me. Theres no need for the details but what I described earlier is sorta how it is for me all the time. Without my cane I probably could walk at all, even with it is painful enough I don’t even wanna think about it without.” He shuddered at the thought of it. “Great now im thinking about it”

Tbh idk how to end this. I was gonna have Dev either not notice Peri wincing with each step. Have him meet up with Hazel and get scolded by wanda or cosmo (probably Hazel) about the state Peri is in. But that would require Peri to shut up and go with whatever his godkid wants. I think Peri is a bit hmmm he has some self worth to him I guess. Idk the word im tired lol.

Anyway sorry if this sucks I wrote it like three days apart and after work so im brain dead at this point.

[ma3-author2]

✧Visionary

GIF by Ma3

Part 3 of Visionary.

Pairing: Lo’ak/Neteyam x Omatikaya Reader

Summary: Due to sudden circumstances, you and the Sully family are on your way in search of a faraway place to flee to safety. Even if this new place your going to stay in, your heart still remain from your homeland. Yet, maybe this new home where you're staying won’t be that bad.

Theme: fluff, jealousy, a new discovery, slight depression, feeling a burden.

Word count: 2972

Warning: Expect some English errors, as English is not my first language.

Key word: I/N - Ikran Name.

Part 1 of: ✧Visionary / Part 2 of: ✧Visionary /

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

You don’t know how long you’ve been flying; you lost count on the third night as your mind was occupied by something else, or rather, what you’ve been feeling since the beginning of the journey.

For the past three days, in 3 to 4 hours, the family and you need to land, as Kiri and Neytiri need to replace a new bandage around your leg, even if you told them that you could handle it, but they only ignored you, telling you not to be stubborn.

Norm and Max made a prescription for how they needed to replace a new bandage around your leg at the same time they needed to recheck it.

Because of the hours of flying and I/N movement, the stitch may open with all of that.

The suppose one day trip to where the new home would be, it took two and a half days to arrive. Currently, you're still in the sky, and any minute now Jake will signal you all to land as they need to check on you.

You feel like a burden to them, and you can't help but sigh deeply as you watch their tired face more than you have, despite the fact that you're the one with a gun wound and need a cane to walk straight. 

This was noticed by Lo'ak, who flew a little closer to you and asked if you were okay.

Snapping from your thoughts, you averted your gaze to your left, and as you noticed Lo'ak's worried face, you quickly smiled.

"I’m fine." You simply lied eyes going back on the front.

He was about to ask you again, as he knew that when you lie, your ears twitch. He finds it cute, but in this situation, he's worried as to why you are lying.

This wasn't unnoticed by Kiri and Neteyam, who were just behind you, as it was their time to support you in the case of sudden tiredness or drowsiness, as the first medicine they gave you made you almost fall off your Ikran.

It's a good thing that there was a nearby rock.

Before they even went in front of you to talk to you, Jake's sudden call startled them. As for you, you already know what time it was.

"Ay, ey!" Jake is signaling to rest first on a nearby rock, as you all need to regain your energy and your Ikran need some rest. In addition, it was time to replace a new bandage around your legs. 

"Your hand."

Seeing these two again with their hands offering some help, you can’t help but sigh as well as chuckle, "Guys, you don’t need to always do this; I think I can handle it."

Indeed, you can.

As Neteyam and Lo'ak retrieve their hands, they walk away, attending to their Ikran as if the previous event had not occurred, and their faces are covered in an embarrassed expression.

While Neytiri and Kiri were eyeing one another, signaling with knowing eyes at these two Skxawng, they quickly smiled when they saw you walking toward them and seeing your struggling walk. 

It hurt both of them to see you like this.

"Sit, I’ll look." Neytiri gently pulled you toward her, patting the seat next to her.

"It’s good. How’s the medicine? Has it still made you sleepy?"

Even though it stings and hurts, you just laughed it off as Neytiri began cleaning the wound and replacing the bandage.

"A little bit, but unlike before. I think me and I/N can still fly."

"That’s good; we’ll be there soon." She assured you, "Wait here; I’ll go get some food." You didn’t even say anything when she gestured with her hand to stop you from standing.

You wanted to get it by yourself, not wanting to rely on them anymore, but seeing her eyeing you, you just chuckled and thanked her.

While waiting for Neytiri to come back with the food, Kiri, who was still beside you, checked if the bandage was right or if it was too tight or not.

Seeing her worried face, you placed your hand on her shoulder, gaining her attention.

"Kiri, Mrs. Sully already double-checked it."

"I’m just making sure."

"Thank you, but you don’t always need to; I will speak if it’s not in its right place." You said, averting your gaze at the sea.

Pandora is not only known for its beautiful forest and flying mountains but also for being a vast open sea where no one knows what awaits them at the end of the world.

Just seeing the open sea with nothing but the big rocks standing in the middle of it, you can’t help but think of what this new home you will be in, will it be the same as the forest? Will the reef Na’vi like you? Would they be friendly and accept Jake's family as well as you?

There's only one way to find out.

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

Arriving at the Awa’atly Metikayina Clan, you and the other got a glimpse of view from a far and seeing it’s unique home and the big mountain behind of it. Your heart began to beat as both nervousness and excitement filled you.

As the sound of the horn alerted everyone, they began to gather as the sound indicated an outside guest. You followed Neytiri from behind, landing safely on the soft sand and carefully going down.

You can't help but feel a little embarrassment as you reach for your cane. Since when did you care about other Na'vi opinions? was on your mind, and as you grabbed it, you wanted to follow the others.

You almost stumble down as the injury part goes numb. It's a good thing that Neteyam was there to catch you on time.

"you okay?" He asks, hands are now on your shoulder, supporting you to stand up.

"Yeah, I’m good. Thanks."

As you all followed Jake, who was now raising his hand in the air, showing the Na’vi Reef people that you all came in peace, You couldn't help but smile as Neteyam literally followed in his father's footsteps. 

You didn't mean to snort at him, but it slipped out of your mouth.

Neteyam, who heard your laugh, couldn’t help but glance at you, and just seeing you like that, he smiled, "What?"

"Nothing."

He didn’t believe that the evidence was already in front of him. Just by seeing your ears twitching and, what's more, your grining lips, he knew you were hiding something, and whatever that was, he wanted to know what it was.

If it’s him that made you laugh, he would gladly do what he did before. Just to hear that laugh again, but if it's not from him...Perhaps he doesn't want to hear that the laugh is directed at another Na'vi.

As he was about to ask you again right now. His gaze can’t help but look in the direction you're looking.

Two reef boys about the same age as you and the others were now making their way out of the crowd, and as you told him, the tall boy must be the Olo'eyktan and Tsahik son.

For some reason, Neteyam doesn't like the tone when you say that this boy is the son of the leaders. "How do you know?"

"He has that aura."

"Aura? Then what about me?"

"Hmm?" You glanced at Neteyam, who was now pointing at himself and waiting for your answer.

"Yeah, Y/N, what about us? do you also see an aura?" Lo'ak butted in to correct Neteyam, saying that he was not the only child of Jake Sully.

"Yeah, you two, you have it."

"That doesn’t sound convincing." Neteyam chuckled, only to pause when your gaze returned to the two reef boys.

Neteyam couldn't help but pursed his lips, clearly annoyed, as did Lo'ak, who was snickering at first. Just what did these two reefs Skxawng got your attention that quick.

You, on the other hand, are simply observing whether these two boys are friendly or a threat. which you didn’t have to continue observing as they already gave you the answer. After you gave them a greeting, it wasn’t even a second before these reef boys insulted you three.

"Is that supposed to be a tail?"

"I don’t know about that, but what is she holding?"

You would have said it sarcastically, as if it were a baseball bat, and smacked it on his face, but seeing Neytiri give you a knowing look and mouthing not to do what you were thinking, you moved away.

To prevent doing so, and was now beside Neytiri, who gently moved you to her left side.

"Okay, ssst. Cool it."

When Kiri, Lo'ak, and Neteyam were about to launch out, Jake called his children to try to calm them down, then eyeing Neteyam to compose himself as his the less Na’vi, Jake knew would launch on someone.

While Lo’ak and Neteyam nodded, forcing themselves to calm down, Kiri was gritting her teeth, scowling, and rolling her eyes.

Lo'ak, who was about to go where you were wanting to ask if you were okay, only to halt when his eyes landed on the side. Seeing this reef girl, who was now walking toward them,

You, who also noticed it, can’t help but be awed at her look, and you also can’t help but smirk when Lo’ak greets her, obviously trying to make some move. Oh, how you remember his first crush, which was unsuccessful in your opinion.

The Olo'eyktan appeared soon after, greeting both the Sully family and you, but for a split second, he looked at the cane in your hand, and just seeing his expression knocked you out.

Not literally. You just felt a sudden sense of self-consciousness, which made you move the cane behind you.

The next to arrive was Ronal, the Tsahik of the Metkayina clan, the one who has a history of how she treats the outsider, which you understand as she is just protecting her people.

One of her qualities you admired, but seeing her look at the cane as well as at you, you can't help but look down after greeting her.

"Why do you come to use Jake Sully?" Tonowari asks

"We seek Uturu."

"Uturu?" Ronal repeated the word, averting her gaze toward Jake.

"A sanctuary for my family."

Ronal and Tonowari made a quick glance at each other. "We are reef people; you are forest people. Your skill will mean nothing here."

"We will learn your ways, right?" Jake averting his gaze to his mate who nodded at him, telling him how they can.

"Yes." Neytiri simply said this while looking at Ronal, who was now grabbing her tail and glaring at her for obstructing her space.

"Their arms are thin," Ronal said after looking at the little Na’vi, holding it for everyone to see.

"Their tails are weak." She then grabbed Kiri’s tail, which caused Kiri to express how hurt she was when Ronal grabbed her tail.

"One is limp, you will be slow in the water." Ronal made her point, to which you simply looked down, starting to feel a bit of shame at the same time, biting your lower lips, irritated that the Tsahik insulted you.

"You, how did you become like that?"

Before you get to answer, Jake volunteers, whispering to Tonowari that he can tell her in private, "Just not right now."

"Hmm," Ronal hummed, moving toward Kiri again, who was then checking Kiri’s hand. "These children aren’t even true Na'vi," she said, as she showed it to both Jake and Neytiri.

Kiri attempted to call Jake, who looked down. "Yes, we are!" Kiri did it herself by retrieving her hand.

Ronal then moved toward Lo'ak, but first she glanced at you, or rather at the bandage wrapped around your leg.

"They have demon blood!" showing everyone Lo’ak’s finger, which made the Metkayina people gasp, but Jake walked right in, showing the Tsahik his own hand.

"Look, look," Jake said as he held up his five fingers. "I was born of the sky people, and now I am Na’vi; we can adapt. We will adapt."

The Tsahik was about to continue telling Jake he couldn’t stay, only for Neytiri to prevent it by telling her how Jake is "Toruk Makto."

While Jake tried to make a peace negotiation, his mate had other plans, and he couldn’t help but express his disbelief. When he was about to pull her away,

Neytiri continued, "He led the clans to victory against the sky people."

"This you call victory? Hiding among strangers?" Ronal then moved an inch toward Neytiri, whispering, "It seems Eywa has turned her back on you, chosen one." and directing the last word to Jake.

As Neytiri snarls at the Tsahik, followed by Ronal. You just hope this day will be over, as you want to rest, and what's more, your legs are starting to throb.

Kiri, seeing your expression, immediately went to your side and said, "You okay?"

You forced to smile "Yes, just a little tired." Kiri sighs in relief, not seeing a hint of twitching ears.

This wasn’t unnoticed by both leaders; Ronal eyed your form before walking away after Jake apologized.

While Tonowari is explaining to the Reef people, reintroducing Jake Sully and telling him that he cannot bring his war here, Neytiri approached you and asked the same question.

"Kiri, what time is it?"

"It’s… already pass the hours." Kiri's whispered eyes were worried when she glanced back at you.

"I’m fine, just tired."

Neytiri sighs, glancing back to the leaders: "Uturu has been asked." means they cannot decline; and if they did, it might be a bad image to decline the chosen one.

Tonowari, hearing the word, sighs, nagging his mate to gain her attention, who was looking at you. And when Ronal glanced at her mate, who was only eyeing her sending some message, she did the same.

"Toruk Makto and his family will stay with us; treat them as our brothers and sisters. But they do not know the sea." Tonowari then glanced back at Jake.

"So, they will be like babies taking their first breath. Teach them our way so they do not suffer the shame of being "useless."

"What do we say?" Tuk was the first to thank the Olo’eyktan and Tsahik. followed by you and the others.

Tonowari then introduced his children and how Ao'nung and Tsireya would guide Jake Sully's children, while you waited for him to recognize you. But it never came, and it made you invisible.

This wasn’t unnoticed by the family. The four children were about to tell both leaders about your presence, but their parents silenced them. Knowing it’s best to learn when your leg healed.

But even if you know about that, it still hurts not to get acknowledgement. like the first greeting.

"Come, I will show you our village." As Tsireya helped you with your stuff and you thanked her for it, she was about to ask about the leg part but didn’t when Neytiri tagged you along with her and Kiri.

So she just asked the Na’vi beside her, which was Lo’ak. "What happened to your sister's leg?"

"Oh, s-she’s not my sister."

"she’s not?"

"No, she’s a friend. Best friend." Lo’ak correcting himself at the same time gulping his saliva, biting his lower lips.

"I-I’m Lo'ak, by the way."

While the two are getting to know each other, Lo’ak purposely changes the topic because he doesn’t want to tell the history regarding your leg.

Neteyam and Tuk were following from behind to their new home; he couldn’t help but glance at you worriedly the whole time.

"Don’t worry, Y/N is getting her medicine soon; she will be fine, and she’s strong!" Tuk smiled, bouncing her way to the new home.

‘I know that, is just… why does she looks so tired?’

"This is it, your new home," Ao’nung said, showing you the place where you will be staying from now on, and as you stepped in, wanting to rest, you didn't see the edge.

What's more, as you lost your balance, your injured leg throbbed as you used it to support you, but because of the pain, you continued to free fall.

But thanks to Ao’nung If he didn’t catch you, you would be kissing the ground and adding a new collection of injuries, making the Sully family worry more.

"May I remind you that it’s different from your previous home?" Ao’nung sneered, and just hearing that tone added to his smiling smirk. you second emotion your previous thoughts.

"Thank you; I’ll take note of that." You simply said moving away from him following Neytiri behind.

While Ao’nung moved away to let the other enter, he received a glare from all of Jake's Sully kids except for the little one. Now this made Ao’nung think of a plan.

He won’t lie when he walks toward the crowd, wanting to see what the outside looks like.

The first Na’vi to capture his attention was the Na’vi girl inside the marui, who was now lying on the bed mat. Even if you have the thing in your hand, he knows that you have a strong aura.

What else is that? The eyes said it all.

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧

Part 4 is up! - ✧Visionary

Ps: Don't forgot to re-blog and heart! thankeee~!!

Question:

How's the story? I purposely cut it short so you guys would be curious as to what happened next. And anyone wants part 4 of this?

Of course you do XD 

Other One-shot's

✧ Encounter /// ✧Sightseeing

Do check this out if you have some spare time: Some books of mine

[yanderelovlies]

𝓤𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓵 𝔀𝓮 𝓶𝓮𝓮𝓽 𝓪𝓰𝓪𝓲𝓷

You knew it was a bad idea to get attached to V. It was clear he was only around for the mission, and once it was done, he was. You couldn't keep away, though. The way he always seemed so calm and collected. Flawlessly beautiful even as demon blood splattered around him. His elegance even extended to the way he talked and taunted. It was hard to find a flaw in V, making it harder to stay away.

Somethings don't go as they should, unfortunately, and that's how you ended up cuddled up with on the couch talking about your dreams and the future.

"Oh! After this whole thing is done, I have to show you this little jazz club I'm town! I think you would really like it."

V chuckled as he as he ran his fingers through your hair. "That sounds like a nice change of pace to Dante and Nero's... music."

You smiled up at him. "So then it's a date!'

V stared at you for a moment. He knew he couldn't promise that to you, but despite that, he still smiles at you so lovingly. "Of course, little wander...I wouldn't miss it for the world." He kissed your forehead before pulling close, trying not to think of consequences he brought for himself, promising that.

.

Not long after that, he disappeared. He left the next morning without a word. Nico assured that it he went with Dante and Nero to finish this Qliphoth problem, but it didn't put you at ease. Why didn't he tell you? Or wake you? You were part of this mission, too!

It took you a while to catch up to the three of them at the bottom. Right when you walked into what seemed to be outside, the first thing you noticed was V weakly raising his cane to strike at the Demon bellow him.

"V!"

When his cane made contact, your vision was obstructed by a powerful light, making you cover your eyes. When you finally were able to open, then a single man stood with his back turn.

"Vergil," Dante growled, readjusting his sword.

The man turned to the crowd, his eyes scanning over Dante and Nero till they landed on you. His eyes softened. "Litte wander."

You took a step towards him before Dante stepped in front of you. Vergil's glare hardened at the sight of his brother. You didn't bother listening what they were saying. All you could focus on was the fact the man in front of you was V or at least a part of him is.

You snapped out of it what Vergil used the Yamato to open a portal telling Dante to meet him at the top.

This time, you ran towards him, pushing Dante aside. "Wait!"

Vergil stopped but didn't turn to you. You stopped not too far from him, hoping he would say something to you.

"Meet me at the top little wander...be careful." He walked into the portal, and it immediately closed after him. Well, now you had no choice but to see this through.

.

Once again, you were the last to arrive. Both vergil and Dante were making their way to the edge as you felt the platform below you began to sway. Dante and Nero were yelling at each other while Vergil stayed silent.

"Vergil!" Now, all eyes were on you.

Dante let out a sigh as he wagged his finger at you "No not you too."

Vergil and you kept eye contact as he walked closer to you. He held out the book V always held, "Keep this till our...jazz club date." You took the book looking down at it before looking back at him. "Until we meet again, my little wander."

He said nothing else before turning to his Sin form and flying off the edge to the underworld. Nero had to drag you away from there and to the van as you quickly left before the qliphoth collapsed. While everyone cheered and sighed, you kept looking at the book in your hand.

Was this his way of keeping a promise? Would he be back? Does he have V's memories? Who was he?

There are so many unanswered questions that you were ever sure you would have awnseres to. Yet you still held out hope that he would be back to keep his promise. He was still your V, after all.

[angelikook]

Love Blinds

Pairing(s): Blind!Jungkook x reader

Genre: Angst

Word Count: 4.7k

Warning(s): Accident(s)

Summary: You are his oldest and only best friend, but why do you leave him all of a sudden when he needs you most?

A/n This fic was requested by the sweetest person on the planet, @thehopelessromanticclub. I know this took me quite some time, because I'm also juggling with work and uni. Nevertheless, I had so much fun writing this. While this was one of the hardest fics to write, I enjoyed every process it took. Fun fact, this fic is literally the first fic that made me cry when I wrote it. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I've never met a blind or visually impaired person in my life. Everything I've written about blindness and living as a blind person, I learned about them from the internet. I know that there's only so much one can learn from the internet. If there are any inaccuracies about them in this fic, please let me know.

Masterlist | Join/Leave Taglist

There was one thing on top of Jungkook’s wishlist: to be able to see his best friend, you.

It happened when he was too young to understand the world around him. He was around four or five years old. One morning he woke up still able to see cars passing by, people walking by, he could even name all the colors he saw. The next morning, he woke up to darkness, nothingness, and his mom’s cries.

He met you not long after. He was playing in the park while also learning how to use a walking cane. After half an hour of successfully not walking into anything, he accidentally tripped on his cane and fell.

He wasn’t a crier. So as the pain on his knees spread – he was sure it was at least bruising – he still kept quiet. It went like that for a bit since he didn’t have enough power to stand up again, the pain on his knees was too painful.

The next thing he felt was the soft touch on his free hand, the hand that wasn’t holding his cane. And then, he heard a girl’s voice, “Here, take my hand. I’ll help you up.”

With that, he took the girl’s hand – your hand – and introduced himself as Jungkook.

+++

Jungkook fidgeted on his seat at the bleachers as he waited for you. Hands were already clammy to the point he wanted to wash his hands. You were supposed to come a whole 30 minutes ago and he was supposed to be listening to his coach’s briefing by now. He tried to call and text you, but you didn’t reply to any of them. In your defense, you weren’t big on calling and texting, you preferred scrolling mindlessly on social media and sending him memes.

“Kook, coach Lee is waiting for you by the pool, don’t you wanna go?” His mom woke him up from his deep thoughts.

Jungkook sighed. “I’m worried about Y/n.”

The seat beside him creaked, a sign that his mom took a seat beside him. “Stop thinking of her. Obviously she doesn’t think you’re that important.”

“She was never late, mom. This is just a one time thing,” he defended you. He never understood why his mom disliked you. For all he knew, she had hated you since the first time you met him back at the park. All this time, his mom probably only tolerated you because she knew how much you meant to him.

“The show must go on. Worry about her later.” With that, his mom stood up and left him again with his thoughts.

It took him around five long minutes to realize that his mom was right. The show really must go on. Whether you came or not, he still had a competition to win.

Just as he stood up from his seat, he heard someone run to him.

“Am I late?” you asked in the midst of panting, seemingly you've been running.

Upon hearing your voice, Jungkook smiled. “Well, I’ll be on in a bit. So, kinda?”

“I know you’re gonna do great, as always.”

“And I know you’re gonna ask me for a free meal if I win.”

“‘When’ you win, you mean,” you corrected him.

He laughed heartily. He didn’t know why but you always managed to lighten his mood. “I think it’s time to talk to coach Lee. He’s been waiting for me.”

“It’s your own fault for waiting for me.” You lightly pushed his shoulder.

“It’s your fault for being late.”

“You know why I’m late.”

“You snoozed your alarm again?”

“Yep.” You pushed him again, this time a bit harder. “Now go. The competition’s about to begin.”

“Go sit beside my mom, yeah?”

You huffed. “Your mom doesn’t like me. I’ll sit here. I’ll find you once it’s over.”

“I tell you multiple times to ignore her. I want you there.”

The swimming competition went just like how his other competitions went. He listened to coach Lee, shook the hands of other participants, swam like he was born for it, and won the competition. It was easy. It became a routine.

“But your mom doesn’t. I’ll be okay, seriously. Just go, your mom’s already glaring at me.”

The crowd surrounding him and congratulating him, him thanking them, and him waiting for your turn to congratulate him also became a routine. A boring routine that he would rather skip. He’d rather celebrate with the people he loved, his mom and you.

After the crowd around him left, you finally came up to him and gave him a big hug despite his body was still half wet. It was the 'you' Jungkook always knew, supporting him no matter what.

“Congratulations,” you whispered to his ear. “Again.”

“You sound like you’re tired of congratulating me,” Jungkook joked once you let go of him.

“I'm not tired when it comes to getting free food.”

Jungkook chuckled. “You’re lucky the prize money I'll get will be a bit more than usual. I can take you to that new cafe you’ve always wanted to try.”

“Really?”

He nodded. In his mind, he could only imagine how beautiful your smile would be and how the glimmer of happiness in your eyes shined through. And just like that, the wish to be able to see you grew stronger.

Knowing how his mom was towards you, Jungkook took the initiative to celebrate his win in two different settings: once with his mom and once with you. He’d always done that despite deep down wanting to celebrate it with both his mom and you.

+++

“What’s your plan?” you asked after you picked up your ice cream that he paid.

“For? Don’t be cryptic, please,” Jungkook replied in a bored tone.

“For swimming, of course. I bet you’re gonna get another offer.”

“Already did. Coach Lee wanted me to join this year’s national competition. He thinks it’d be good for pushing my career forward.”

“I assume you accept it?”

“It’s not like I have any other competition at the moment.”

“Yeah, you’re right, I guess. When will it be, though?”

“Still a few months away.” He laughed when he noticed the strain in your voice. He assumed it was because you were nervous for him. “If you’re worried I don’t get enough rest, relax. Coach Lee purposely makes me rest for around a month.”

“For a person who’s never been to a national competition before, you sure seem so chill.”

“If I stress it out, I’ll be unreasonably overthinking.”

“Good wisdom.”

“I know. I’m always wise.”

“Says the one who got scratched by a cat because they kept annoying it.”

It was true, though, he indeed was scratched by a cat once. That was one experience that he didn’t want to repeat ever.

Jungkook protested, “That’s just one time.”

“But that one time makes you not always wise,” you teased him.

“I’ll never win an argument against you, will I?”

+++

Time flew after that. Jungkook really did take a break for a month. If by break it meant he was swimming every other day instead of everyday. And once the month was up, he was training intensely until it was exactly a month before his competition.

Knowing well that you were waiting for him on the bleachers, Jungkook left you to change his clothes into his swimsuit. To say that he was excited for today’s training was an understatement. His last training ended with him beating his previous record. And the day before that, he received an email from the mayor that he was proud of Jungkook for representing his city for the next national competition. He basically was on a roll for the last few days.

So it nearly broke his heart, he could almost physically hear it, when he came to the bleachers and his mom told him that you left.

“Why did she leave?” Jungkook asked with his eyebrows furrowed. That was not very Y/n of you to leave without noticing him.

“Who knows,” his mom answered while gently nudging him to walk towards the pool, “She has always been rude.”

“No, she’s not,” he protested. “Something really did happen, mom. Did she said something to you?”

“Nope,” his mom replied quickly. “Well, you can always call her later. You have more important things to do now.”

That was what he did. He practiced, practiced, and practiced. Lap upon laps he did, trying to shake the thought of you, yet he failed. A tiny voice at the back of his head kept telling him to check up on you ASAP.

Once practice ended, even before coach Lee could give him a feedback, he went straight to the changing room, changed into his clothes, and dragged his mom away.

“Where are you going?” his mom inquired behind him. “Coach Lee hasn’t done talking.”

“I want to meet Y/n.”

“She’s probably fine, Jungkook. You’re gonna look stupid in front of her for doing this.”

“You always tell me to trust my gut feeling. My gut feeling is saying that I need to go to her now.”

“Do you even know where she is?”

Jungkook was stunned for a second. He didn’t know where you were.

“I’m gonna call her. Let’s go to the car first.” With that, he pulled his mom again in the direction of the parking lot.

Inside the car, he indeed called you, but no matter how many times he tried, they all went through.

“No wonder,” his mom commented, “That girl seemed like she doesn’t care about you.”

“If she didn't care about me, she wouldn’t have come.”

“Probably she’s in her moody phase. Give her some time.”

Having enough of his mom’s rude comments, Jungkook snapped, “Mom, please. I don’t have time for this. Just take me to Y/n’s house.”

“I thought she’s with you,” your dad answered after opening the door to a very worried Jungkook. “This morning she said she was gonna accompany you to practice.”

“She did, but then left without telling me.”

“We’re gonna try to contact her, don’t worry,” your mom’s voice spoke up. “Just go take a rest, you seem so tired.”

Upon hearing your mom’s words, he realized that his shoulders had been hurting and his legs were cramping. Jungkook sighed. “But please tell me when you find her.”

“Of course.”

But no one contacted him for the next few days. Not you, and definitely not your parents. As days went on, he became more and more anxious. His phone calls and texts still hadn’t gone through. It was as if you disappeared off the surface of Earth.

He couldn’t even imagine what had happened to you to make you suddenly disappear that day. Not only that, the fact that his mom became more insufferable the more he talked about you made his blood boil every time he thought about it.

There was one time when Jungkook, who never raised his voice at anyone, raised his voice at his mom.

“Right now, your practice is more important than Y/n,” his mom had said.

At first, Jungkook had tried to ignore her in hopes that she wouldn’t say anything else. But he was dead wrong.

“Jungkook, are you listening to me? I said, focus on your practice, stop thinking of Y/n.”

And just like that, Jungkook had snapped, “You’re not helping at all, mom.”

Little did he know that him snapping at his mom only made his feelings even worse.

There was also a time when Jungkook deliberately ran away from practice after hearing his mom’s words about you, leaving both his mom and coach Lee worried. Sure he came back later that day, but he had hoped it was enough of a sign that he didn’t like what his mom had said.

“She’s been gone for days. I doubt she’ll come back. She probably already forgets you by now,” was what his mom had said to trigger such a reaction from him.

And it was only the day before when Jungkook had yet again rebelled, this time to the point he was gone all day.

That day, Jungkook’s mom had said something along the lines of, “You should be glad that Y/n’s out of the picture, you can focus more on winning the competition.”

But to be quite honest, it didn’t make him focus on his practice anymore.

His time was slower and slower to the point coach Lee – who was never mad at anyone – stopped that day’s practice abruptly.

“Whatever problem you have right now, I hope you deal with it soon. I don’t want your head out of the game like this, especially not when the competition comes.” With that, coach Lee had ushered him home.

Later that day at home, his mom had also lectured him about ‘being a good son’ and ‘making your parents proud’. But he cared none of that. He still had a missing best friend to find.

His mom had sighed when she realized that Jungkook hadn’t been listening to her. “I don’t know what else I need to do. Paying for your practices takes almost all of my savings, yet you're getting worse and worse.” Then she whined, “Tell me what more I need to do.”

Only two words had come out of his mouth. “Find Y/n.”

+++

For a few days after that, Jungkook still kept at it with his acts. He only came to practice when he felt like it. Once he was no longer in the mood, he just left. Not at home, but somewhere where he didn’t have to meet his mom – the playground where you and he met the first time. He wasn’t gonna lie to himself about the fact that he frequently went to the playground in hope to find you there. But just like how bare his phone is from your messages, the playground was bare of your presence.

Sitting at the playground made him remember that one time when you and Jungkook planned to go visit your grandpa that lived just outside the city.

One day after sitting at the playground for sometime, he walked back home with an ache both at his chest and head. While the competition was getting closer and closer, he was still no closer to finding you. He almost ran out of time, and unfortunately, also his patience.

As he felt his cane touched the familiar gravel in front of his house, he sighed. It was time to face his mom again. But right before he opened the front door, he heard a talking voice from inside. He recognized the voice as his mom's. He pondered for a moment whether he should walk in and interrupt his mom. Then he decided against it when he heard his name in his mom's conversation. It sounded like his mom was on a phone call since he couldn't hear the other person's reply.

"–lengths I did for Jungkook." Pause. "I just want the best for him since it's gonna be his first national competition." Pause. "I got rid of his best friend." Pause. Jungkook felt like his heart stopped beating for a moment. "Yes, the girl who made him blind."

If his heart stopped beating before, now it was beating so fast. Adrenaline was pumped throughout his body, making his head almost hurt.

There was no way what his mom had said was true. None of it. Not the fact that his mom got rid of you and definitely not the fact that you made him blind. No way. His mom was just bluffing.

But as much as he liked to believe that, his mom still carried on with the conversation. "I don't know what else to do." Pause. "I've tried everything I could, but now he just skips practice whenever he wants." Long pause. “Guess I’ll try that. Thanks.” Pause. “Bye.”

With a huff, Jungkook opened the door. As he closed the door behind him, he heard his mom gasping.

“You’re already home?” she asked.

He shrugged. “I am, for a while.”

“Did you hear everything?”

“Not everything. But enough to know what you did.” Jungkook deemed it was the right time to let out his anger bit by bit.

“So now you know the truth. Why I don’t like Y/n and why I got rid of her.” It sounded like there was no remorse at all.

+++

It was his fourth birthday. Just like how kids who had birthdays before him celebrated their birthday with the whole class, Jungkook also celebrated his birthday with his classmates.

“Jungkook!” A little girl called him while running up to him.

He smiled upon seeing the big present on the girl’s hand. It was big enough to fill the girl’s hands full.

Once she was close enough, she handed the gift to him. “This is for you. Happy birthday.”

Jungkook accepted it. “Thank you, Y/n.”

Like any other class full of kindergarten kids, the class was chaotic. The teacher was busy trying to sit everyone down and left the birthday boy with his best friend on their own. That was a big mistake.

Little you had seen a lot of funny videos depicting pranks people do on their friends and wanted to try one on Jungkook. So just as Jungkook wanted to take a seat beside you, you pulled his seat, making him fall butt first to the hard floor.

Then everything flew by. He only remembered faintly. He remembered his loss of vision. He remembered hearing cries. He heard a lot of cries. From himself, Y/n, his parents, Y/n’s parents, even the teachers. Then the strong smell of disinfectant indicated to him that he was in a hospital.

There were also doctor’s checkups. A lot of doctor’s checkups. He remembered those checkups almost made him stay up all night. It was hard to forget how scared he was of the doctors handling him.

The only memory that engraved into his mind was when the doctor told his parents that he was permanently blind because of the accident. Then he heard more of his parents’ cries.

+++

Jungkook shook his head in disbelief. “You’re wrong, mom.”

“You’re still defending her?” His mom raised his voice. “Look what happened to you after she came into your life.”

“I’m defending her because the good things she’s done outdid the bad things.”

His mom grunted.

“Yes, she might be the one who made me blind, but she is – was – also the one who pushed me to become a national athlete.” Jungkook regained his breath before continuing his speech. “At the start, I didn’t really like swimming. But when Y/n said that it was cool to be able to swim fast, I was motivated.” Pause. “And don’t even talk about how many times she supported me, accompanied me. She never skips coming to my competitions and practices.”

All he said was true. As much as he wanted to hate you, he couldn’t. A part of him – a big part – still needed you and missed you.

With one last statement, Jungkook ended his conversation with his mom. “You not being able to forgive Y/n is the reason why my career almost ruined. If you really want me to succeed, help me find Y/n.”

It didn’t even take his mom more than three days to find you.

Jungkook was listening to a podcast when he received a notification from his mom. Words couldn’t explain how shocked he was when he realized it was the address he knew well – your grandpa’s house. With you on his mind, he left his house and went to where you were.

Because your grandpa only lived outside the city, it didn’t take long for Jungkook to arrive there. The familiar smell of lavender still lingered just like how he remembered it. He smiled internally knowing that your grandpa still took care of his lavender plants after all this time.

Right before he got the time to step further near your grandpa’s house, he heard a voice calling him. He instantly recognized it as yours.

“What are you doing here?” you asked, your voice getting louder by the second indicating that you were walking towards him.

Couldn’t hide his smile because of meeting you again, he grinned. “What are you doing here?”

“I asked the question first.”

Jungkook sighed. Still the same stubborn Y/n that he knew. “I’m looking for you. Now answer my question.”

“Helping my grandpa around. It’s been some time since I went here.”

“But you never stayed here this long.”

“Is that a problem?”

Jungkook’s face fell. It looked like you didn’t want to talk about the elephant in the room. “I think I know the reason why you’re here.”

“Of course, I already told you the answer.”

“No, I mean–” he hesitated, not sure how to break it to you, “–I know the truth. And I’m sure you know about it, too.”

You grunted. “Jungkook, I don’t understand. What are you talking about?”

He decided to just drop the bomb at once. “The accident when we were young, my blindness, my mom hating you and making you leave me.”

He heard you chuckle at his response. “If you really think the reason I’m here is because of your mom, you’re dead wrong.”

Good. He made you angry.

“I’m not gonna beat around the bush, if you have nothing important to do here, I suggest you leave.”

“Can we talk about this first?”

“What is there to talk about?”

“Everything!”

“I don’t have the time. Just go home.” Jungkook heard your footsteps, you were walking away.

“Please, Y/n,” Jungkook called.

“What is there to talk about?” you repeated the question after stopping in your tracks.

Almost giving up, he answered, “Us.”

“We should never be friends, Jungkook. Your mom was right to separate us.”

“Why?”

“Look at you!” you half-yelled. “Look at what I did to you! Oh, gosh, I can’t even look at you without hating myself.”

“Y/n-” Jungkook took a step.

“No. Listen to me first. I’m really grateful to know you. But your mom was right. I did too much damage to you. We can never be friends.”

“Y/n, I don’t understand what you mean by that. It was an accident, yes, you knew no better. But don’t think it was a tragedy. It wasn’t and it’ll never be,” Jungkook tried to reason with you.

“How can you call it ‘not a tragedy’ while you’re standing there unable to see permanently?”

“I lived with this for so long I almost forget what it feels like to be able to see. Being blind is a part of me now and I already accept it. But why can’t you and mom accept me?”

The next thing he knew, you ran to him and hugged him so tight he was scared that would break a bone. But another part of him, his heart specifically, drumming against his chest he was sure you could hear it.

“I’m so, so, so sorry. You don’t even know how much I’m sorry,” your cries muffled by his shirt. “I’m sorry if I couldn’t accept you. Never even think once that I have bad intentions towards you. I would never do those things to you intentionally.”

Jungkook patted your hair softly. He was lying if your cries didn't hurt him.  “I know, I’ve forgiven you a long time ago.”

“I tried to make amends with you. I befriended you, supported you, accompanied you. I basically did everything I could do. But when I realized that you were nicer than what I had thought, I only felt worse.”

“I understand.” This time Jungkook brushed his hair through your fingers. Your hair smelled like strawberries, the exact smell he liked. The smell he had missed.

“And when your mom told me that you would do better without me, I believed her.”

“That’s where she’s wrong. I did worse, you can ask her. I couldn’t do it without you.”

You pulled back slightly, but not breaking the hug. “But you’re so good at swimming.”

Jungkook smiled. “Only when you’re watching. So, can you, please, accompany me again?”

“What about your mom? She would be angry.”

“I already explained everything to her. In fact, she was the one giving away your location.”

“That’s because you forced her,” you whined.

“To be honest, I don’t really care if she still can’t accept you. At least she won’t bother you, hopefully.”

You sighed happily. “Okay. I trust you.”

As he laid on his bed that night, 

*Add a scene where Jungkook lays at night, thinking about how grateful he is for making amends with you. He also realizes that maybe he has a crush on you.*

+++

True to your words, you went with him during his practices. Although his mom never talked to you or even approached you, Jungkook felt like things were going better. At least she wasn’t talking bad about you anymore.

On the D-day, you came early – even before Jungkook himself – much to his surprise.

“You’re already here,” Jungkook said in surprise when he heard you call him. His mom was talking to coach Lee, giving him the perfect opportunity to talk to his best friend.

“For around 15 minutes, yeah,” you confirm. “Are you nervous?”

“Don’t even ask that kind of question.”

“Okay, sorry.” You laughed. Oh, how he missed that sound. “Hey, I don’t know if you’re allowed to eat a lollipop before a competition, but I’d like to give you this.”

He felt you pushing what felt like a lollipop into his hand.

“Aside from eating heavy meals, I can eat anything. So, thanks.” He opened the lollipop and put it into his mouth.

“I thought it would make you feel less nervous.”

“You know I can handle nervousness well.”

“You’ve never been to a national competition before, though.”

“Fair enough.” A sudden thought flash in his mind. “Y/n, I have something to tell you, but I think it’s better to tell you after the competition.”

Though it was a nation-wide competition, everything went quite similar like Jungkook’s previous competitions. Minutes before the competition began, he received a briefing from coach Lee, shook hands with the other competitors, and then the competition finally began.

Everything slowed down once he was in the water, it was only him, his mind, and the flow of water around him. Much to his surprise, everything went smoother and calmer than he had anticipated. He never knew that national competitions weren’t much different from his other competitions. In short, he was in his element again. He felt free.

Sooner than what he had liked, the competition ended and he was allowed to go home empty-handed. Empty-handed because he lost. He came in fourth place. Not as good as what his mom wanted, but for a newbie like him, it was just the beginning. He wasn’t sure what was the reason, but he really wasn’t feeling sad or anything.

Once he walked out the changing rooms, he felt someone hugging him. From the smell, he could tell it was you.

“I’m super proud of you. Fourth place in your first national competition? You’re gonna be a legend,” you rambled in his ear while still hugging him.

Jungkook hugged you back. “Thanks.”

You finally let him go. “I overheard coach Lee tell your mom that there’ll be another national competition. The organizer isn’t as big as this one, but he thinks it’ll be good for you.”

“Wow. Isn’t that, like, too soon?”

“Don’t know when it’ll be, though. You can just ask coach Lee.”

“I will. Thanks, Y/n.”

“So, do you have something to tell me?”

Jungkook furrowed his eyebrows. “Huh?”

“Before the competition, you told me you have something to tell me.”

“Oh, right.” To be honest, he kinda wanted to regret it as soon as he had said it back then. Damn you to always remind him.

“What is it?”

“It’s nothing serious.”

“It sounded serious.”

Jungkook groaned. “Do you really need to know?”

“Of course. I’m your best friend. I’m ready to listen to whatever you say.”

“Then I hope you’re ready to change that status, too,” he blurted. Jungkook wanted to hit himself as soon as he realized what he had said.

Y/n coughed, probably in surprise. “What? What status?”

Jungkook took a deep breath. “I have liked you since I could remember. Don’t you think it’s time to change our status from best friends to something more?”

There was a delay in your answer. Jungkook bit his bottom lip, scared you wouldn’t like what he had said.

“Right now?”

“Well, yeah, if you’d like.”

“Of course I’d like to.” Then Jungkook felt your weight on him; you hugged him again, this time stronger than before.

And without words, Jungkook felt your soft lips on his. It tasted better than what he had imagined. He smiled to the kiss.

There were two things on top of Jungkook’s wishlist: to be able to see you and to be your boyfriend. At least he was able to check the latter.

[Masterlist]

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[cupcraft]

i hate when they gaslight house about his pain. i definitely think that sometimes his physical pain is exacerbated by his stress/mental pain but that isnt something to disregard either. When hes stressed he thinks about his pain more even if it doesnt hurt any more than it did yesterday and people brush him off like it isnt a real thing. like 😭😭😭It still hurts guys

Exactly.

Like stress, anxiety, trauma, etc. are all things that can exacerbate pain and make it worse. They are things that can be caused by the pain, intersect with it, etc. It can make the pain harder to process and manage. Many things. Chronic pain and your mental state are linked but that DOES NOT mean his pain is "made up" just "psychological".

House needing therapy and addiction counseling aside, his pain is still real. It's always real. HIs pain being amplified by stress isn't fake. His pain causing stress which then causes it to be amplified in a cycle isn't fake. His pain is real and deserves to be taken seriously. Every fucking doctor in this show has no fuckign clue what chronic pain is like and it shows. They also act like House being addicted to vicodin is some moral failing when in fact like um he also does need pain management...and opiates are a form of pain management and a consequence of long term opiate pain management can be addiction which becomes a chronic illness on its own that deseves its own patience and management. People, other than fellow patients and disabled characters that also get what he's going through, see House's pain as a made up moral failing that is just his long sinister plan to be drug seeking which is just one of the most gutting parts of the show (and unfortunately a reality for how many people and the medical system treats disabled people and also addicts).

I think it becomes the most jarring when there's a narrative how many people defend Stacy's decision to break House's medical consent and autonomy, and the near sort of judgement he gets for not wanting an amputation. His decision over his body part is his own, his relationship to his leg is his own, his autonomy over wanting a prosthetic versus a leg and a cane is his own. There should be no morality assigned to what House wanted to do with his leg injury. And maybe, that morality is assigned as a sense of guilt people (especially Cuddy) have for the fact the only reason he was injured in the first place is that people gaslit him to think his pain was made up and that he was just some drug seeking individual (see the lecture episode where he talks about this especially amplified about how even the med students thought this patient who was really him was drug seeking and not having a blood clot).

There's also a way that many characters weaponize his pain, like they're trying to teach him a lesson to his "ego" and "selfishness". For example, I think to the episode where they took his parking space and made him and another disabled doctor be pit against each other. I think to how like "well technically the ADA and your accomodations says you can walk 50 feet so your new parking spot is exactly 46 feet so that means youre full of shit house!" and I think to how Cuddy was like "um being ambulatory is less disabled than non-ambulatory" which is gross and fucked up. I hate how she made him "prove" his disability by making him use a wheelchair, and I hate how she punished him for standing to save a patient's life. I hate how she was unreceptive to House being like "hey well 46feet or not you dont understand how much goes into my day planning where to walk, when I use the bathroom, when the elevator's out, etc. My whole day revolves around managing and mitgating my chronic pain" and like telling her there's more to his accomodations just being like "50 feet" because it is in fact more nuanced than that. And instead, it's again, yet another moral failing. The narrative pushed on house of "If only he amputated his leg and stopped seeking drugs he'd be so much better" versus the reality f addiction and chronic paina nd how that intersects with mental health

[phoenix-writez]

Decided to post entry #1 here as some people may not enjoy reading things on ao3 :D

I'm not sure how to format the fic on tumblr, so feel free to give me criticism! (Constructive. Criticism. I will ignore insulting)

So, have fun with Scar's POV! It's in first person, so if you're not a fan of that... Sorry! I try to analyze the characters beforehand and write them as themselves! Scar's a silly little guy, so I hope I got that down!

—

Entry #1

[SCAR]

August 18, 1997

This place is fun, honestly! I got here just four days ago!

A theater filled with red and pink strobe lights, it feels rather disco-ey, if I'm being honest. There's a rather large stage where people step up and say whatever they want. There's actors, circus acts, and even singers. Or karaoke.

Why is karaoke spelled that way? It should be kareoke, but to each their own!

Either way, I've gone up there a few times just to sing songs from my favorite cartoons. Had a few cheers from the crowd, but not many.

I loved it here though!

When I first got to the theater, I had been with a few friends. I don't know where they went, lost track of them. I remember this guy welcoming us, holding out his hand and grinning fancily.

“Welcome, all! This is the Eye’s Spy Theatre!”

Trust me, it's not spelled theater. I learned the hard way.

“Want me to take you to your rooms?” The fella acknowledged each of us. He had a towel folded over his arm, just like a butler would in a fictional story. I tilted my head to the side like a dog, “Sir? No offense, but I don't recall this being a hotel.”

“Perhaps you missed the sign, but all is well, Scar Goodtimes, your room is already booked. First floor, as always! Can't be giving you anything further than that with your given situation, can we?” He says, then steps behind me.

I raise my hands, “WAIT– Hands off, fancy guy! Firstly, what do you mean?”

“How do you know his name?” My friend asked. Fancy Guy looked over, “When you book a room, we get your names on the screen. Besides, I know everyone in this town.”

Right.

—

August ??????

I woke up with a start, hearing a bang nearby. I pull myself onto my chair and roll onward, out of the room.

“What?! What happened–”

I look towards the stage, my breath slows. “Oh! Obviously.” I giggle, then I do a double take. What the– “What am I doing up there?!”

On the stage, was me in a weird outfit. I've never seen this kind of outfit before, honestly. Maybe some new fashion shaped itself in the six days I've been here.

Wait… how long has it been?

I blink, but I can't really think. My memory is kinda foggy.

I see more characters on the stage, some blue haired guy and this ginger lady clearly tired out and breathing heavy. I'm not sure if it was Hollywood level acting, or they were actually just overworked out of their minds.

I roll towards the bar, and no, this bar isn't necessarily an alcoholic bar you see at night time when everything else closes. I'm sixteen! I can't even drink anyway! I doubt rules changed that much when I've been here.

I grin at the tender, “Do you have anything other than really warm milk? It was you, after all, who said you'd make this the best experience possible y'know.”

“I… we do, in fact. Anything you want, dear hero.”

“Hero? My name is Scar, did you forget that fancy pants?” I smirk. “No. I did not.” He said flatly.

“Oh.”

“I'd like just a simple water, honestly.” I said. “Ah, only the crispiest we'll hand out for you.” The man kneels towards the shelves.

Huh? I blink. He's reaching up at them actually, I swear I've been seeing things.

I spend my time drinking the water and distracting myself from the fact I may have just met my walking doppelganger. Though he's using a cane, still those legs can work and I'm jealous.

Just kidding, I don't care.

—

After a few minutes, I nearly jump, but I keep my composure. Another guy, looks around my age but surprisingly short. I'd give him a… 4’11? Jeez, really needs a growth spurt by now.

He ordered an orange juice and stared into the distance. That's when he spoke to me, “Fun act, right?”

“I wasn't really interested, too confusing. What was that back there, some kinda jester or whatever?”

“I'd give it a 5 out of tried their best.” The short guy said, then he turned to look at me and giggled. “You look like one of the actors.”

“Must be a long lost brother.” I put my cup down and look at him, and woah. My eyes widened and I smiled awkwardly. “Well! That's a… so what's your name, orange juice?”

“Oh! My name's Grian.” He smiled so brightly. I chuckled, “Cool! My name is Scar.”

“Oh I know–”

“Huh?”

“Sorry, long story.”

“Everyone knows my name in this place!” I look back at the table in front of us. “That would be a given. This place isn't really, well, real.” Someone walked towards us both.

Actually, a group.

The actors.

“Aw, I'm getting a standing ovation from the fellas themselves–” I look around. “Where's the guy who looked like me?”

“Hi.” This strange lab coat wearing guy– oh! I know him. Cub?!

I blinked. How long ago did he show up here? Two days ago I saw him on the news and he looked much shorter, and he'd been running away from a police department, some sort of forensics office he'd blown up.

Cub raked his hands through his hair, it looked really messy. “I sorta used this weird amulet to change my appearance.”

“Are we still acting?” I asked, “Amulet, you say? Well, I simply cannot!” Immediately, my hand impacts my forehead dramatically. “... We're acting, right?”

“No.” Grian said, “Though he is lying, listen, Scar. I'm gonna ask you a really weird question and you have to answer me.”

“Uh-huh…”

“What year is it?”

“Oh! That's easy, 1997, duh! Did you guys hit your heads or something?” I smiled, chuckling. The bartender finally came by and gave Grian his orange juice. Then he vanished.

Grian grabbed his cup and he took a sip. “1997, hm? What if I told you it's not?”

“I wouldn't believe you.” I giggled. “I've been here for a week, duh! Got here just Monday with some of my friends. Where did they go, though?” I looked around. I still couldn't see them.

“They probably got out.” The sassy blue guy said, “Yeah, or stuck.” The ginger crossed her arms. I looked at them. “They’re just in their rooms.”

“Why don't we take a look then, huh? Where are their rooms?” Grian asks, I shift awkwardly. “...Third floor.”

“This thing doesn't have an elevator for you?” Cub asks.

“If a building ain't as tall as five stories, there's no need.” I lean back in my chair. “Which is, uh, needless to say, no.”

The ginger thought for a moment, then she grinned. “Tell them the numbers, and we'll go on from there. I'll stay back with you, just so you have someone near you!”

“I'm fine on my own.” I looked at her. “Absolutely not,” she glanced at me up and down, “genuinely, if I had to guess. You're dehydrated, probably haven't eaten much, and the moment you see the sun your eyes will wish you'd gone blind.”

“With these strobe lights? Might as well have gone blind already.” I shrugged, she stared at them. “They're LED now.”

“Meh! I think they always have been, luminescent and whatnot.” I said, “What's your name, by the way?”

“Gem. That there is Scott, he's uh… something, alright.” She sighed. Scott, the fancy blue guy, waves. “I'll go up third floor, what's the room?”

“Rooms, uh… 307, 315? I think?”

“Why are they so separated?” Grian’s eyes widened. “The rooms might've been taken between ‘em.” Cub immediately began his journey towards the stairs.

“Eight rooms between them?! Cub, there's seven people in this room!”

“Most people got drained after the second day and went to sleep. Haven't seen them since.” I added.

Grian paused. He looked at Gem, and they both seemed to come to an agreement. I heard Gem mutter, “Hypnos,” and she sat by me. Grian stood up.

“I thought that guy was fine by now! What's going on?” He grumbled. My head laid on the table like my neck had gotten exhausted from holding it. “Maybe he changed his mind.”

“Or maybe, this establishment is really old and he forgot to tear it down.” Grian sighed, then he took a step forward and looked at the ground.

“What's… this symbol doing here?”

“Aren't you supposed to be heading up to the third floor?” I said, for some reason my body felt like all the energy was getting sucked out of it. I don't know how, but everything in my field of vision was getting blurry. And Grian had sharp-ish ears, and an elven face. I swore he didn't look real.

Because he didn't.

I glanced at Gem, and she looked completely normal. Besides the fact that she was actively plotting something and had a sword in her belt. I don't know what I saw before, but I guess I just assumed she was in some sort of costume.

Everyone wears costumes around here. I've seen a giant guy with a hundred arms walk around here demanding for some cyclops guy, then he exited the building fine as that.

I felt nauseous, and everything went black.

—

I don't know. I don't know what today is. Everything is the same.

I wasn't out for long, fainting spells don't usually last longer than a minute. I woke up and everyone was staring at me with concern. “We found your friends.” Scott grimaced, “And we found you, doing the same thing as them.”

“I passed out, I don't know what happened.” I groaned, “Grian, since when were you an elf guy?”

Grian giggled, “I'm not an elf, idiot.”

“Why are your ears all sharp then?”

“Oh! That's just normal, I was born like that.” Grian shrugged, “But back to you. You passed out on our watch, which means this doesn't happen when you're on your own.”

“Possible.” Cub gazed at the floor, then he leaned and played around with the tiles like it was a puzzle. “What do you mean possible? We proved your hypothesis, thank you.” Grian tilted his head.

“What if we're not registered here?” Cub lifted himself, holding a brick that revealed a gaping hole underneath the building. “What if we're just simply wanderers with no true meaning to this place?”

“We'd still be people, hun.” Scott said flatly.

“Not in this place. I think this is an entirely different world compared to, well, Earth.” Cub grabbed a coin out of his pocket, and he dropped it into the abyss.

“Scar, do you perceive things differently than normal people?” He looked up at me. I couldn't help but think that this situation is way too serious for a random questionnaire I've had billions of times when I was younger.

The answer is yes.

It's always yes.

“When I was, like, six, my mom found me digging at the ground. It's ‘cause I heard some rattling, and I wanted to free the thing that was suffering. When I finally did, it was a skeleton monster! She grabbed me and pulled me away, told me never to do that again.” I started, “That those things are dangerous, that my father would be back and he would never want to see me playing with creatures I can't define.”

“I mean, a skeleton monster is pretty much accurate.” Grian laughed, “Wait, you don't know your dad?”

“Nope!” I smiled, “Always asked, was told he died.”

“...So how would he be back?” Scott squinted. “We had a ouija board in our house, although it's only for eight year olds and older, and I was barely able to simply sleep on my own.” I sighed.

But, the presence of the board didn't scare me knowing what it did. I quite like the idea of ghosts, and I know we had some in our house. They slept in the corners, watched me do my chores, and stared at me when my health declined.

Not much they could've done anyhow.

I felt my hands clenching on my legs, and I released them. “Uh… I never believed that. There was no grave we visited. Ever. She just said it like it was a fact from years ago.”

Cub nodded, then we heard the coin ding and slam itself into what sounded like concrete. I glanced at the floor. “What was that?!” I press my hands to the wheels of my chair. “Cub?!”

“I heard what I needed to hear.” He smiled, then simply disappeared.

We all stared where he left. “UGH! CUB!” Grian grabbed a knot of his own hair and tugged, but not pulling anything out. I gazed at the underground, and I swear I felt a calling.

Like I needed to be somewhere.

That's when the stupid butler grabbed all of us and dragged us out. “I do believe your time here is over, thank you for being so kind.” He shoved us out the door. I locked my chair and looked around, frozen.

��Where's Cub?! WHERE'S IMPULSE YOU–” Grian grabbed Gem and pulled her aside. She'd been yelling at the guy the whole time we were getting kicked out. I had no idea there was another person with them that had gone missing.

I had a theory, but it wasn't so friendly.

And I swear I could see that guy in a different form now that I had been placed outdoors.

He was tall, almost goopy, and I swear he had one giant eye in the middle of his face that stared deeply into your soul.

Normally I saw him as just this generic black-haired guy. He had this way about him that felt, well, casual yet business.

Like he was familiar with you but he didn't want to get fired.

I covered my face with my hands. Just thinking about my mother made me realize something.

“Guys, what year is it?” My tired eyes felt like they were dragging on the ground. I could just feel the hot pavement scraping my eyelids.

“...Scar, it's 2025.” Grian said.

“...Seriously?”

“Yeah.”

I stared at the outdoors, and felt like I'd been through multiple disasters at once.

“It was just a week…”

But now I realize how much time I truly spent there. And it doesn't make me too glad to know it.

[sunderedazem]

Smash or Pass (FFXIV)

Tagged by @calico-heart! (!! ty!) No-pressure tagging @azems-familiar (DEWIT) @ectojyunk, @akirakirxaa, @snail-fever, @thefreelanceangel and anyone who sees and wants in-!

Corrain Gealai (de Fortemps)

(art creds: @/minpage!) Quick facts: Height: 5'0" Age: 24 (Dawntrail start) Gender: trans man Sexuality: gay, polyamorous Pronouns: he/him

Pros: - loves learning and reading - this man taught himself to read as a teenager and never looked back - adventurous and inquisitive - he'll try anything once - makes it a point to be competent in or knowledgeable about any skill he picks up - playful, high-energy - will always be good to go again - physical affection is his love language. He will lay on you and purr until you move him (and then pout sadly when you do) - always tries to do what's right, even if it'll kick him in the teeth later - can't cook for shit but does the dishes without being asked - Loyal to ideals, then people, then places. - Believes that people are inherently good, and will not be convinced otherwise - knows how to sew (and is fuckin good at it) - ADHD as all hell :D

Cons: - Abandonment Issues Georg. He'll push you away if you get too close - it hurts less if he leaves you first. - Nasty temper, complete with a mean streak - Reckless. Incredibly so. - Cannot handle grief or loss well. Tends to turn to alcohol about it - Refuses to ask for help with his problems until he breaks down about them/ - Fightsexual, in some ways. the self-endangering kind. - Pranks everyone he can when he can. Run. - ADHD as all hell D:

Details to Know: - Corrain is a partial paraplegic after the battle with Zenos in Endwalker. He was lucky to regain most sensations and some fine motor skills, but he walks with a cane or forearm crutches on good days, and either needs a wheelchair or is bedbound on bad ones. - Wakes up very slowly on mornings where nothing's happening - Coffee AND Tea - Stubborn as all hell. This can be both a good and bad thing - Needs time alone, and time outside. He's got a limited social battery around most people - Is part of a package deal in most AUs with @azems-familiar's Lelesu. If you can't get along with his bestie, goodbye. - deathly allergic to chocolate (cat) - spiritual, not religious. Probably has to do with him being a white mage - recent top surgery. While in Sharlayan, right? - Romantically: treats partners like good friends, just with sloppy kisses. Romance might feel a little dead if you don't think reading together quietly on the couch for three hours can be a nice little date. He's also the type to want to do things or activities with a partner in lieu of anything else. He'll only attempt romantic things for a partner's sake- he doesn't need the gestures as much. - Sexually: Usually submissive as hell, and- as stated earlier, willing to try anything once. He's a huge brat, and will oftentimes be as cocky as humanly possible - but once the defiance is worked out, he's sweet and lives for praise. And on the occasions that cockiness stays intact, he's a demanding, teasing dom, and enjoys his partner's pleasure more than his own.

So with all that in mind....

[auteurdefeu]

Can I ask to hear some of the thoughts about the crackship polycule

Alright, so. Welcome. This is gonna be a doozy. I will do my best to explain the timeline @turtlelover59 and I came up with and keep it PG-13 because it is A Lot at times. This started off as an idea about Fix&Pasha being FWB with Hunch, who is in an open relationship with Dan, and then it spiraled from there.

(I headcanon Dan as gender-fluid but will be using they/them pronouns in reference to them for this :p)

> Pre-Canon, Hunch and Pasha had feelings for each other in the countless times they crossed paths at work, but they never acted on it, putting their work first. Hunch always asked for her input on his cases when he could because she was so much smarter than her shitty desk job seemed to account for. He was truly fascinated by her, but he never found out her story until much Later.

> Hank made a point of mentioning that The Fix worked for several people at the table of PIs so I’m choosing to believe he was hired on occasion by Hunch, who took up a few important cases that needed someone eliminated. We all know Hunch’s track record in fights, so,,, he calls up someone capable, and their interactions were limited to that.

> Canon Shit Happens, Hunch realizes his feelings for Dan and helps to set up Pasha and Fix before he eventually gets with Dan. Around this time, Fix and Hunch also start getting closer, as a “friendship therapy” sorta thing, talking about their experiences on opposite sides of the law

> Dan learns about Hunch’s former crush on Pasha and teases him about it, encouraging him to follow through on it if she was open to it. Similarly, Pasha and Fix discuss their lack of romantic experiences before getting together and upon mentioning how she used to have feelings for Hunch, Fix gets curious heh. After much discussion, they propose having a few no-strings-attached Meetings to Try New Things (you can guess what I mean) and it’s absolutely fine, things are going well

> Surprise, strings are attached. Pasha and Hunch finally start to develop the relationship they were too scared to try all that time ago, and it’s around that time that Dan is invited to join a few of their Meetings, not wanting them to feel left out. Hunch is beginning to realize just how much he likes The Fix, while Fix is having a time-period-typical crisis about liking Men, and the fact that the last time he liked a man (M. Bition) his feelings were used and manipulated to get a job done

> Communication is hard especially for men so they just don’t talk about it until Hunch gets himself into trouble because of course he does. It's not until after they have him patched up and stable again that one of the Wayward Interests (their name is Skipper, a pirate interest, they'll be relevant later) tells Hunch how scared Fix was. Hunch had no idea Fix could be scared of anything, let alone for him, but they finally talk and realize just how much they mean to each other and make things official between them

> After the last bad injury, Hunch starts using his walking cane! (yes I'm projecting chronic pain onto him) He's had it for a while but was too stubborn to use it and thought people might view him as less capable because of it, but he does need it. His partners actively encourage the use of it once discovering he needs it (and tell him he's very handsome with it<3) and Fix goes as far as to get him a fancy one so he feels more inclined to use it. This means so much to me.

> Uncle Hunch and Auncle (genderfluid aunt-uncle) Fucks. Hunch gets along with all the kids, utterly adores them. He puts on little cloud-puppet shows for them, always having some sugar-coated stories of cases to tell. Dan always pretends to hate them, calling them little shits or rapscallions, but they love playing with them, chasing them and spinning them around, making them laugh. Skipper, the pirate interest, quickly becomes their favorite because the kid keeps challenging them to fight and is incredibly cocky and adventurous. Their stubbornness is perhaps a bit too similar to Hunch.

> While Hunch and Fix are developing their relationship, Pasha and Dan find themselves with more time together. Dan helps out with the kids as much as they insist they don’t like them, but could also be found helping around the kitchen (Fix and Hunch are banned. Hunch gets distracted and mixed together horrible things and then the appliances are all just too small for Fix so he breaks them). Not only that, but Dan’s into fashion and likes helping Pasha find outfits… especially for an upcoming Nondescript Fancy Party. While Fix and Hunch are playing catch-up in their relationship, Dan and Pasha dance the night away tonight and Dan realizes their feelings might be more than just Sexual Attraction.

> Dan and Pasha, as pleasure and passion, aren’t exactly sure what they are but there’s something there. They’ll figure it out in time… as far as they’re concerned, they’ve got all the time in the world. It would be absolutely terrible if something awful were to happen to The Four that deeply traumatized them and set them back from any advancements in their relationships because they had to be more concerned with processing their own shit first.

It gets way darker from there so I’ll leave it with that vague ominous mention. Somewhere in the mess of events, Hunch and Dan get engaged as well, and eventually unofficially adopt Skipper. Their jobs aren’t exactly kid-friendly and they’re both workaholics so they wouldn’t be able to fully accommodate having a kid but in their many visits to the orphanage, Skipper started calling them mama (Dan) and papa (Hunch, of course). To throw in some more fun things while we’re here, Anna has a sort of maternal relationship with Hunch, very much a tired mother making sure he doesn’t do anything too stupid. I’m all about those found family vibes if you couldn’t tell. Hunch also gets a little stray cat! This is not important at all, I just love cats.

Just a. a glimpse at the few things that I am leaving out for the sake of my sanity and the sanity of those who made it thus far in reading. The unmentioned timeline includes, but is not limited to, a near death experience, a brutal murder, extreme manipulation and child endangerment. It got REAAAAL bad and it keeps getting worse unfortunately. I adore these four but for some reason they can’t ever be happy… but! I’m writing something perhaps a bit more hopeful for ao3 to spread my silly gay agenda.