#'his hair is poking out of the hoodie' whatever man

[tricoufamily]

found this old kian lookbook while i was looking for something else it's an outdated kian, editing style, and cas bg but i really like these outfits <3

[jarofstyles]

Leather & Lace

Hello my angels and welcome to Leather and Lace!!! We’ve got a very cute 3 parter (I’ve finished writing it) coming in for you guys. We love a good grumpy x sunshine and couldn’t help ourselves writing another one. Please leave us feedback! We love to hear from you

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Wc- 8.2k

Warnings- oral sex, praise kink, soft Dom h, opposites attract, cum play/swapping

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“How can you be this happy in the morning?” Harry grunted, hoodie pulled over his head as he sat down next to a bubbly Y/N. Her couch was comfortable but it didn’t make up for the fact that he was at her flat at 8 in the morning. 

“It’s not that early, lazy bones.” She hummed, tucking her legs under her as she sat down on the other side. “Thank you for coming to help today, by the way. I know you don’t like getting up early.”

He really didn’t, was the thing. He hated it. Harry only had so many days off and after working a long shift bartending last night, the very last thing he wanted to do was help someone unpack in their new flat. He’d rather claw at concrete than be awake right now, rather eat a raw egg, rather go through tattoo removal. If it was anyone but Y/N he would have laughed in their face at the mere ask. 

But it was her. It was twinkly eyed, pouty lipped, warm hearted Y/N who had asked him a week in advance and promised him a bagel with cream cheese and an iced coffee for brekkie, whatever he wanted for lunch, and ‘whatever he wanted in general!’. Little did she know he was going to say yes anyway, considering he knew he couldn’t say no to her sweet little ask with her smaller hand on his tattooed arm and wide eyes peering up at him. He wasn’t someone who liked to do things for many people without there being some sort of monetary gain, but this was different. 

Y/N had somehow latched herself onto one of the grumpiest bastards in the area while she herself was one of the sweetest girls he’d ever seen. Rarely spoke a mean word of anyone (except when they hurt someone close to her), went out of her way to help anyone who needed it and always wanted to be a shoulder to cry on. He’d seen her take money from her own wallet to cover someone’s bill when they were short, even seen her rush to help an elderly man across the street. It got her into trouble sometimes which was why he was glad that he’d been the hip she’d chosen to attach to. 

Their first interaction had been him sitting in the courtyard of their uni, listening to music under the tree. He’d had his sketchbook in hand, doodling in between classes when he looked up to see a girl with a pretty yellow bow in her hair offering him a cupcake because he looked ‘sad.’. He had been sad, actually, but that was pretty much his normal resting face. He’d tried to blow her off but she’d taken a seat next to him, introducing herself and telling him about her own day to ‘distract him’. He hated to admit that it worked. 

From then on, she popped up everywhere. At first he’d been a bit worried that she was following him but it truly was a coincidence. Y/N had found her way under his skin, wriggled her way into that cold heart of his and made it warm up just a little each time she came around. At some point she’d become a daily fixture in his life, her texts lighting up his phone with emojis and telling him to meet her at the cafe or the library- and for some reason, he followed.

“Mmm. Know y’wanted me here to see me get all sweaty. If y’wanted to see my tats and muscles so badly, you coulda just said so, Sweets.” He smirked, watching her eyes widen. So easy to fluster. 

“No! Stop teasing me, s’not nice.” She grumbled, poking his knee with her socked foot. She’d chosen lavender striped ones today. “I don’t have a lot of strong friends, you know that. Niall’s comin’ by after work to help you put the bedframe together and move the books from the car. Besides, I’ll let you sleepover and everything after we’re all done. I know you loveeeee my bed.”

He did. But more than anything he liked laying in said bed with her. Harry had a hard time admitting he had begun to gain feelings for the girl but deep down he knew he did. He liked that she insisted on cuddles, curling her leg around his and nuzzling her face into his chest, or even better yet the crook of his neck. Loved when she’d sleepily ask him questions about his life and tell him facts about her own. She resembled a tiny kitten while sleepy, insistent on getting all of the pets and attention. 

Harry had decided he wasn’t the relationship type after his last girlfriend had cheated on him with his old best mate- but meeting Y/N had reminded him of the die hard romantic that laid underneath the surface. All the hard work he’d had piling up bricks on top of his red, bleeding heart had seemed to be consistently excavated by the pastel wearing girl who still enjoyed the fairy lights he used to see online in those aesthetic bedroom photos. It scared him a bit at first. Even now, he was nervous about the idea of getting closer to her than they were now because her heart was a tender and precious thing and he didn’t necessarily trust himself not to hurt her- but then again, he knew he’d do miles better than anyone else could. He’d spent the time learning about her as the months went by, listening to her drawl on about the pinterest boards she made, her dream finds she always looked for at the thrift stores, her least favorite reality TV contestants, which pastries she found to be too dry at the cafe and which had the best level of moisture, what blankets she liked, every little tidbit he had stored away in his brain to use at a later date. 

No one would be as protective of her as he would be, which was why lately he’d been entertaining the thought of perhaps moving past the point of no return and trying to see if maybe, possibly, perhaps.. They could be more. 

It had come with a lot of deliberating but he’d come to understand that if he failed, Y/N wouldn’t caste him to the side. She’d never in a million years abandon him like he feared, which only gave him more motivation to go for it though… He was still biding his time. He had to let her get settled here before he shook up her life a bit more. 

They were opposites, the sweet girl and him. Harry was quite literally the bad boy cliche of everyone’s after school special’s dreams. His hair was long and curled, brushing his jaw. He went for darker clothing, usually his ripped black skinny jeans and a band tee but sometimes more eccentric with some silk and leaving his tits out when they went on a night out. His nose had a simple black hoop, his nails painted and chipped though this week they were a bubblegum pink, a la Y/N’s expertise. His body was hard from the gym he liked to frequent and inked, only getting more every month. He wore the occasional eyeliner when he felt spicy. That was only the physical things. 

Sometimes he wondered why she felt drawn to him, as she said. He was dark and moody with a darker sense of humor. Somewhat of a pessimist, he expected the worst from people and tended to stay away from them the best he could. The opposite of a social butterfly, he only usually went out in the past for a drink or to get his cock wet, never for the pleasure of interacting with people. Even then it was rare considering he did quite well in the hookup area being a bartender himself. 

Harry often wondered how and why she felt the pull to be around him and why she felt so at ease in his presence but he figured it had to be that he’d knocked the lights out of a bloke in her philosophy class who’d been riding her ass. He’d made the wrong decision of cornering Y/N at a party Harry had been dragged to, touching her a bit too much and not listening when her smile became thin and she backed away from him after giving a rejection much too polite than the man deserved. There had been no hesitation in laying him out, tugging Y/N into his side and demanding she stay with him for the rest of the party after she insisted she didn’t need to go home. 

Funnily enough she’d been a hit with his own small group of friends, everyone also feeling the same sort of kindred protection over her. Not many people were genuinely warm and fuzzy in the way she was. 

Y/N was… She was the sun, she was a cinnamon roll fresh baked on a sunday morning, she was a kitten sprawled in a sunbeam. All the good things, he could find a way to relate them to her. That probably should have been the indicator he had feelings for her far sooner than he’d ever let himself admit, but she had taken the time to crack him open. 

It was hard to stop thinking about what made her both his opposite and so special. Harry dwelled on how soft her clothing always was, both in color and texture. She liked those pastel colors and fuzzy cardigans, hair bows and those signature mary janes with the tiny heels. Lip oil as opposed to lip gloss because it was ‘too sticky’ but still dragged all his attention to her lips and made him wonder if it really tasted like tangerine like it smelled. 

Her touch was gentle and tender, cautious at first but as soon as she got the go ahead, she showered you in attention. At least, she did to him. Brushing stray hairs out of faces and wiping crumbs off cheeks, she had little sense of personal space once granted permission. She’d been mindful of his distaste for touch at the beginning but once he’d leaned into it, the girl had no qualms about straightening his shirt or leaning into his form, hell- there had been a few times she’d helped herself to his lap when there was no other seating option. Usually that was when she was tipsy considering she would most likely be a little shy sober, but that was something he enjoyed. 

The light to his dark, he doubted anyone else could make him feel the way she could. Hence why he was up after only getting 4 hours of sleep, sipping the coffee she’d gotten him. There was little he wouldn’t do for a hint of her smile. 

—--

“Babe, you’ve got t’make a decision.” Harry said gently, placing the large mirror down and leaning it against the wall. 

“I know, I know but… It’s bad luck to have your mirror facing your bed.” She wrung her fingers together. “I’m sorry, H. I know I’ve been a bit of a pain in the rear today. I promise m’not trying to, but It’s my first place and I just want it to be perfect.” Her head looked down, making his heart squeeze. 

God damn it. Leave it to her to make him feel like he’d kicked a puppy. Sighing, he tugged the bandana on his head back into place and approached her, placing his hand on her shoulder. “M’not upset with you. Promise. I just think you’re overthinking it a bit.” Her superstitions did tend to make her feel a little squirrely sometimes and he knew it.  “We’re gonna make it look perfect. Incredible, even. Reckon the magazines will be calling you up to feature you, but we can’t just have a freestanding mirror slab.” He’d picked it up for her off of craigslist just a bit ago. Even if it wasn’t a dodgy listing, he wouldn’t let her go on her own. That’s how people got kidnapped. 

“Ugh, I know.” She groaned, flopping into his chest. Never mind it being sweaty, she rubbed her nose between his tits and let out a tired groan, her hair smacking his chin. It’d been tossed up in a very messy bun that was a bit lopsided but made her look doubly as cute, though he didn’t tell her that. “Why don’t we mount it to the back of your door then? Not facing your bed, or another mirror.” 

He could almost hear her brain going as she mulled it over before he felt the nod against his chest. “That will be good, I think. I love that idea.” Y/N had been going back and forth over design choices with him all day as if he had a clue about interior decor, but he had appreciated her caring about his opinion nonetheless. “That can be the last thing we do. Niall’s fucked off somewhere futzing with the books so we can eat after that’s done.” 

The thud of his heart against her ear was steady as he gently ran a hand over her shoulderblade. “What’s on the menu?” 

“Think we’re ordering pizza because I know m’too tired to cook which means you lot have to be too.” She chuckled, finally prying herself out of his chest and blinking up at him.”Then we can go to bed.”  He was thankful her ear was away from his heart so she couldn’t hear the way it stuttered. You’d think after sleeping in her bed a multitude of times that he’d get used to the sound of that sentence but it still did him in every time. 

“Okay. I can run and pick it up after I mount this to the door if you call it in.” He knew she wouldn’t want to go. It was visible on her face how tired she was and it melted him internally. He knew that she’d be a little snuggly menace tonight and fuck if he wasn’t looking forward to it. “Gonna run into the pharmacy t’grab some body wash for here, if thats okay?”

“Course it is.” She beamed at the suggestion, making him happy that he’d even brought it up. Y/N used to suggest he sleep heer a lot before and he’d refuse, thinking she was just trying to be polite- but she really did enjoy him staying with her. “I liked the pomegranate one you used last time, just sayin’.” Patting his chest she moved from his grip, heading to grab her phone. “Normal for you?”

“Yeah, love. Same as usual.” He rubbed over the achy spot in his chest that she’d left by pulling away, looking forward to sleeping tonight so he could feel it fill back up.

—-----------

Harry had grabbed the pomegranate bath stuff. He’d grabbed the whole line, actually, the shampoo, conditioner, body wash and some sort of ‘skin buff.’ Whatever that was. 

Y/N had squeaked as he showed her, along with a pack of the makeup wipes she usually used and he’d steal. He’d figured it was about time to be the one to buy the replacements. “Ah! And you got the face mask I like.” Her eyes were wide and bright as she bounced on her toes, smacking a kiss to his stubbly cheek before looking back down at the holographic packaging. He’d hoped he had gotten the right one when he’d seen a sale on them when on his way to the check out counter. It was worth the little bit of money to feel her lips for a moment. “Thank you, H. You’re the best, as usual.” 

“The hell am I?” Niall scoffed, wiping his hands dry after washing them. 

“You’re great too, but he got me the face masks I like and they usually sell out. So he’s a bit higher up in points today.” She placated him, brushing past him to put them in the bathroom. “Harry, plate up the pizza, pretty please!”

As soon as she had disappeared, Niall shot him a look. “When are you two gonna make it official?” He whispered. “The heat eyes bouncin’ off the both of you is sickening at this point. She’s turned you soft.” 

Harry settled with a glare, placing two slices on the paper plate and sliding it over to him. “Eventually. Her whole life is shifting. Can’t do shit right now without rattling her.” It was the first time he admitted or even hinted at having feelings for her besides point blank telling anyone who came around that she wasn’t available. Y/N didn’t know he did that though. 

“Thank fuck you don’t still have your head up your arse. I was worried you’d never admit you’re gone for her.” He faked wiping sweat off his head making the other man roll his eyes. “She’ll be happy, H. You don’t have to worry about her rejecting you. Just go on and do it. She talks about you like you hang the moon every night at this point even when you aren’t around.” 

A weakness he’d spotted, Harry stood a bit straighter before leaning in. “She does? What does she say?” Oh, he hated how desperate he sounded to hear the answer but the fluttering in his stomach made him insisting on finding out. 

“Oh, how thoughtful and kind and generous you are and how you’re the best person she knows, all of that. She stares at her phone and waits for texts from you when she comes out and you’re working, gets these huge smiles or giggles when you do. or tries to get everyone to move the party to your bar.” 

That last part, he’d hoped for. He liked the idea of her wanting to be physically close to him and suggesting everyone come and see him, but knowing she did the same thing he did when waiting for messages from him soothed a piece of him. He wasn’t alone in it. It was hard sometimes for him to decipher her behavior considering she was genuinely so friendly with everyone and he didn’t want to flatter himself and think it he was special… but apparently he was. 

He didn’t have a chance to answer when Y/N glided from the bathroom, finding her spot on the kitchen barstools. “What did I miss?” 

“Nothin’, Babe. Just chatting shit.” He murmured, sliding her a plate with her pizza of choice on it. “Figured we’d go to the grocery tomorrow, yeah? It’s a bit sparse in here with the food.” He had the next day off and intended on spending it with her. They’d made lots of progress today and had 80% of the place unpacked, but he knew she liked those restocking videos online. “Think they’ve got those organizers back in stock.” 

“Oh!” She gasped.”Yes, you genius. I’ll need your help though, strong man. I like the one trip wonder.” It was a tease considering she knew Harry hated making multiple trips up with bags. 

“Lucky for you, you’ve got a lift now and I’ve got that collapsible wagon.” Reaching out he gently flicked her nose for being a brat. “So we won’t have t’worry about that.” 

—-----

Y/N was either very oblivious or a tease. Harry could never fully figure out which one. 

He sat on her bed, messing with her telly when she emerged from the shower in her little cotton shorts and one of his shirts. It was one he’d just been looking for last week, actually, an old Iron Maiden one with a few holes in the collar area. Unmistakably his. The faded gray complimented her skin, looking extra cozy on her as her powder blue plush bunny slippers flopped against the ground and she made her way to her skincare desk. 

“You little thief.” He grumbled from the bed, leaning against her headboard. “I was searching everywhere for that last week.” Though he had narrowed eyes she would know he was only teasing. 

“You left it with me, remember? I ended up packing it so I wouldn’t forget it but… It’s super comfy.” She smiled guiltily at him, spinning in her chair. “Is it okay if I wear it? It still smells like your cologne and it helps me sleep sometimes…”

Ah, a shot to the heart. 

Y/N didn’t know what it did to him to know he was an aid in good sleep. That it both made his heart stutter and his cock throb at the sight of her wrapped up in his clothing like she had all the rights to it. Like he was her boyfriend and she liked to wear it to remember him. Her scent had a similar effect on him, leaving it in his sheets when she stayed over,  “Totally okay, lovely.” He smiled gently. “M’just teasing you. Though it does wonders for my ego to know you like my cologne that much.” 

He knew he was making her a little flustered considering she didn’t look right at him, but he thrived off of that. Knowing he made an impact on her like that made him feel just a bit more confident that she felt similarly to him. There was no answer from her, but he wasn’t done with her quite yet. Standing up with a groan, he made his way over to her little makeup and skincare set up, placing his hands on the back of her chair. “What are you putting on your face?” He asked curiously, looking over her head to the products she had neatly organized.

“Well, first I wipe with one of these toning pads.” She opened the little tub, using a tiny pair of clear tongs to grab one. “You don’t want to be sticking your fingers in there and potentially making them all dirty so it came with this little thing. You give it a few passes over your t zone.” She showed him as she did it, Harry watching diligently in the mirror. 

“Mmm. Then what? You’re always doin’ all of this fancy stuff to your face. Figure that's why your skin is so pretty.” He let his fingers fiddle with a few strands of hair. 

“Thank you.” She said sheepishly, picking up a smaller tube. “Um, I use this undereye cream to help with puffiness and brightening. Its soothing. I apply it with the smallest finger though, because while I’m not afraid of wrinkles it’s the weakest fingers and the skin under your eyes is more delicate.” 

Huh. “Didn’t know what.” He was actually learning something from this. 

“Mhm. Why do you think I tell you to go gentle when you use the makeup remover?” A smile tilted up one side of her lips a bit further, eyes focused on the mirror in front of her. She pretended not to notice the slight shiver he gave her when he leaned down, letting his face get more level with hers- but he did. He noticed anything he could. “A-And then I use some vitamin C stuff for brightening, a serum and a cream. I use the little fan to make it dry faster so it isn’t sticky.” She pointed to the mini pink fan he’d always noticed. He’d just assumed it was for when she got hot. “Do you… Would you like me to use some of it on you when I’m done?” 

She sounded hesitant to ask which he understood. Not a lot of the guys in their friend circle would want that, but he wasn’t that insecure about himself that he’d say no to someone pampering him. Especially not when it meant Y/N getting close to him. “Sure, sweets. I’d love that. Reckon my skin needs it.” 

“What do you usually do with it?” She asked curiously, meeting his eye in the mirror. 

“Makeup remover, wash my face, that cream you left at my place if I remember.” 

“It’s not fair you have the skin you do.” She huffed, shaking her head. “Cruel, actually.” It kind of was. He got long lashes too, which she always complained about. “Go and wash your face first, heathen.”

Harry let out a small laugh before going off to do that. Returning with a fresh face, he stood in his prior position, watching her finish up the routine before holding the fan closer to her face to finish it off. It was an interesting process he hadn’t paid much mind to before, but then again, she didn’t bring every single thing to his place either. 

After putting her hair up in a claw clip, she stood up from the plushy chair and motioned for him to sit down. He did as asked, feeling her residual warmth as she lined up the products for them. “Okay, so we start with the toner pad.” She gently pushed him to lean back in the chair, her face coming closer to his as she delicately swiped it over his cheeks and nose. He was getting an up close look at her, noticing the scar near her eyebrow and a few spots on her face. It made him warm up a bit, being able to see her so close when she was awake. Usually this level of observation was reserved for when she was asleep. “Oi, keep your head up.” 

“Sorry.” He laughed, avoiding the impulse to move the chair back and forth. He liked to swing on it at times. 

“Wait- how about this.” Without giving it much thought, she gripped the chair and swung it over to turn his body to the side, helping herself to straddle his lap. “This seems a little easier, no?” Fingers gently tipped his chin up, eyes focused on her motions. 

Harry’s breath had disappeared. No longer available, he felt her sitting on top of his thighs, innocent as ever as she went through the motions. Tender with her movements and pressure, she was treating him like porcelain while giving him a little makeover. He should be focused on how nice the products felt on his skin, but his mind was elsewhere. 

She smelled amazing, as usual, but having it this close up was a little hard for him. Yes, she sat on his lap before- but not in his shirt, with her thighs on display and tiny little shorts. She didn’t straddle him before either, didn’t let his mind wander to places it shouldn’t. All his energy was focused on trying to ensure she didn’t feel the stiffy that was quickly growing in his pants. 

“I can’t believe how good you’re being for me, H.” She whispered. “No whining or anything.” Her smile was soft as she wiped the serum over his face. “You’re so pretty.”

Fuck. He swallowed thickly, trying desperately to not let his cock construe those words into the filthy praise kink he had, but it appeared to be a bit too late for that. She had no idea what she was doing to him and he didn’t want to be a perv, but god damn. If the girl continued, there would be no denying that he’d cream his damn pants. Being pet on, feeling her brush his hair off his forehead while she stroked his face and adjusted his position to where she wanted… He was only so strong. “Thanks.” He murmured, trying to keep his composure. 

“Of course.” She beamed, seeming pleased. “I’m surprised you’re letting me do this, but you’re full of surprises.” It seemed like she didn’t know the battle he was facing internally, which was his goal, but that was soon to be ruined. “Hold on a second.” Shifting slightly on his lap, she stood up momentarily before sliding further up. “Sorry, I was falling down a bit-” 

Harry hadn’t meant to, he really fucking didn’t. But she sat right on top of him, squirming a bit. Giving his dick a bit of friction, making his hands grip her hips and sit her down hard to stop the movement. He couldn’t open his eyes, couldn’t face her as he heard the hitch in her breath. “Fuck, I’m sorry. Sorry, I didn’t- I promise m’not being a creep or anything.” He winced. “Just been a while and uh-” 

“Hey, it’s okay.” Her voice rang out, fingers brushing through his hair. “H, look at me. I’m not mad.” Of course, her words were sweet and syrupy, going right to his dick yet again. Y/N had no fucking idea how much she effected him, how many times he’d thought about her in this positon and how guilty he felt that he’d turned a sweet moment into something like this. “C’mon. You don’t need to be embarrassed.” 

He took a moment before opening his eyes, looking at her face. Studying it, making sure she wasn’t uncomfortable. Her hand cupped the side of his face, a slight pout on her pretty lips. Y/N didn’t seem upset about it, seeing as she sat still and could most definitely feel his cock under her. He could feel her cunt over him, hot through the fabric and he was doing everything in his power to be fucking normal. 

“There you are.” The tables had finally turned. Harry was the shy one in this moment and Y/N was the one seemingly not freaked out. “It’s a natural body function, H. I know you’re not some kind of perv. I sat on your lap, remember?” She soothed his nerves. “Besides, I’m flattered. Was beginning to think you thought I was some kind of troll or something.” The smile kicked up on her face, but his frown deepened.

“The fuck? Why would you think that?” Brows furrowed, he didn’t like that she thought he didn’t find her attractive. He called her pretty quite a bit. 

“Well, I’m not your type. You go for all those tattooed girls with the bad ass attitudes, which is cool cause I think they’re hot too but… I’m all soft and squishy, y’know? I like the soft things, kinda the opposite of you so I just thought I wasn’t someone you’d be attracted to. M’nothing like what you go for.” She didn’t seem offended by this, rather stating it matter of fact- but Harry couldn’t believe how wrong she was. He had to wonder how long she thought this. 

While he was secretly pining after her, she was thinking he was going off to get blowies by the girls that flirted with him which, sometimes he did. At the beginning of their friendship, he tried to stave off those feelings for her by getting someone else underneath him, fucking away the frustration but he learned fairly quickly that none of it did much when his mind was on someone else. It’d been months at this point. Sure, he liked a bit of flirting to boost his ego, but that was only when Y/N was preoccupied. 

“Well, you’re wrong.” He said sternly. “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Dunno where the troll idea came in when m’always staring at you.” He scoffed. “No more of that bullshit. Wouldn’t be hard if I didn’t think you were stunning. Trust me.” In fact, she was the only thing that got him hard these days. Thinking of her mouth, her thighs, her tits, her ass, anything. Even her hands, for fucks sake. “Don’t ever doubt how beautiful you are t’me. Pisses me off.”

“Sorry.” She bleated, pouting back at him. “I didn’t mean to. It’s just.. You call me pretty but I never would have thought you meant it like that. I like that you let me cuddle you and stuff so obviously I know you aren’t repulsed by me but, I dunno.” She swallowed, looking down at his bare chest. “I’m sorry for getting you… if you’re uncomfortable.” 

God, he was mucking this up wasn’t he? He shook his head, letting his thumbs rub over her hips as he softened his face. “No, sweets. Don’t apologize. S’not a big deal, I’m not mad at you. Just don’t like the idea of you thinking poorly of yourself. You’re fucking stunning.” So stunning that his cock was still hard under her. “I’ll go take care of it when we’re done, but no more squirming. Okay?” Squeezing her, he tried to rectify the situation. “No more fussing.” 

“But…” Y/N’s lips twisted slightly, sliding her hands down to his shoulders. “That’s not fair.” 

Harry blinked a few times, looking her over hesitantly. “What d’you mean? I’m okay, pet.” 

“Well, It’s my fault that you’re like this.” She protested. “I can fix it, if you want. Haven’t given too many blowies before, but I can take instruction pretty well.”

Harry truly thought he was dreaming for a moment, his face hot as she gave him an innocent look. Like she meant it, though it slightly embarrassed her for not having a lot of experience. But feeling her shift on him clued him back into reality. This was real. “You- You don’t have to do anything for me, Y/N.” He was holding on by a string. “You didn’t mean to do it. It’s not your responsibility to get me off just because my cock’s got a mind of his own.”

Y/N huffed again, shaking her head. “I want to. Can I?” Her face shifted slightly. “You’re not making me do anything. It would make me feel better If i could take care of you.” Her eyes met his. “I mean it. Promise.” 

And god, if Harry was a stronger man he’d lift her off his lap and insist on taking care of it himself. He’d explain that it could make lines blurry and he liked her a bit more than a friend and they’d have that talk. But he wasn’t a stronger man, and she rolled her hips on him again with a hum, making his head fall back when she repeated the action. “Fuck.” He whispered under his breath. “As long as.. As long you’re sure. I don’t want you to regret it or anything.” 

“I won’t.” She peeped. “I like making you feel good, Harry.” Her face seemed brighter as she watched him nod.

“Go on then, sweetheart.” He sighed. “I’ll show you what I like.” 

Never in a million years had he expected her to be visibly excited, slipping off his lap and on to her knees in front of him. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Eyes looked up at him with curiosity, hands running over his thighs as she waited for direction. He’d dreamt of this so many times, stroked off in the bathroom to this very mental image to get his load out quicker. His cock pulsed inside his sweats. This was really happening. “M’not wearing briefs under these.” He warned, pushing the waistband down as he slowly tugged himself out of the pants. His hand was slightly shaky ass he gave himself a squeeze at the base, a soft hiss leaving his teeth when her hand covered his own. 

“I’ve only done it a few times but…” Her eyes widened. “Yours is the prettiest I’ve seen.”

And fuck if that didn’t get him going. Harry took pride in his dick, as a lot of men did, but to get that compliment was better than anything else. His hair was normally trimmed shorter, but it had been a while. It was groomed a bit at the base, his happy trail leading up his stomach. “Thank you.” He mumbled, removing his hand and letting hers take over. Y/N was eager and that much was obvious, feeling her give him a few strokes as she shuffled closer in between his spread thighs. “I- I probably won’t last long. I wasn’t lying, it’s been a while.” And he’d imagined her in this position so many times that he was programmed to get off to it quickly. 

“That’s okay. You’re quite big so it’ll be better for my jaw.” She giggled. Fucking giggled while her thumb rubbed over the slit, making him shudder. He’d always imagined she’d be much more shy in this situation, but again he was proven wrong. “What do you like?” 

Honestly? He could cum just like this. Her stroking him slow, looking up at him with that pretty little face. Splatter her pretty face with pearly strings leaking from the slit of his cock, let it drip down her cheeks and chin. But she wouldn’t like that answer. “I’m okay with anything you give me, but I… I like to hear you.” He swallowed, a shaky exhale leaving his nose. “And uh, a bit wet. If that’s something you’d like.” 

Y/N looked like she was taking note, nodding at his words. “I want to know what you like, m’okay with anything.” She smiled. “I knew you had to be big cause.. Y’know you’ve got the energy. And I’ve felt it a few times when we cuddle, before you wake up. It’s just different to see it.” Y/N leaned her head on his thigh, continuing to jerk him off. “I’ll probably choke a little bit, cause you’re the biggest I’ve taken. It’s okay though, I’ll be fine. I’ll pinch your tummy or somthin’ if I need a second to breathe.” 

Who the fuck was she? Y/N had never, ever shown or hinted at being filthy in her life, but here she was. Talking about choking on his cock. He throbbed in her hand, making her eyebrows raise. “You liked that. Noted.” Leaning forward, she kept eye contact with him as she dragged her pink tongue from the base up to the tip, letting it sit there for a moment before she pulled away, giving him a few more strokes. “You can show me what you like too. Don’t be shy about it, H. I want you to feel good.” 

Harry nearly lost it as he watched those gorgeous lips purse, spitting right over the tip. It slipped down his length before her hand caught it, stroking and spreading it over his cock. Filthy, filthy things filled his tongue immediately, but he tried to pace himself. “Fuck me…” He whispered, gently gathering her hair in his hand. “I didn’t know you had this in you, gorgeous.” It nearly bowled him over. “Can you.. Take it in your mouth. Suck the tip for me. I want to see that.” 

Normally, he had no problem being a cocky, arrogant man. He was dominant most of the time with his hook ups- but Y/N wasn’t just a hook up to him. She was special. He didn’t want to do a single thing to potentially fuck this up. He wanted her to like this, to see how much he liked it too. She had no problems following instructions, the man watching as her lips stretched around the tip and dipped down a bit as she suckled on it. A soft hum left her mouth and vibrated over him as he curled the hair around his fist, making him groan. “Yeah, jus’ like that, angel. Fuck.” He kept his eyes on her as she bobbed shallowly, taking moments to rub her tongue over his leaking slit. “You’re so good, so sweet t’me. Can’t believe you’re doin’ this.” 

Y/N pulled off the tip, lips wet as she peered up at him. “I’ve thought about it before.” She whispered, lapping over the side of his length. “Wanted to see your cock. I knew it’d be pretty.” 

What the fuck? Harry’s brian felt fried, completely caught off guard by this information. Sure, he had thought maybe once or twice she was teasing him but it wasn’t often. Y/N was just so sugary sweet and kind, a slight air of innocence, and… Now she was telling him she’d thought about sucking him off before. “You have?” 

“Mhm.” She stroked him a bit firmer, the slick sound of her hand around his wet cock getting louder. “I heard.. Heard rumors and felt left out. You like me the best but you never asked me to do anything.” Rubbing the tip over her pouted lips, Harry was shocked yet again. 

“Cause y’mean more to me than any of the other people.” He swallowed. “Too fuckin’ sweet. I like you the best, you’re right but.. You’re my sweet girl. Didn’t want t’use you for anything like that. Would break my heart if I hurt you and you’d not want to see me again.” 

“What if I wanted you to use me?” She asked, peering up at him with those eyes. They drove him absolutely mad. “I know you wouldn’t hurt me unless I asked, H. You’re so good to me… I just want to be good for you too.” Taking the tip back into her mouth, she pushed herself down further and he felt his stomach clench. It took him off guard, feeling the hot mouth take him down and bob herself against him, a soft hum vibrating over him. 

“Oh- Fuck.” He let out a broken groan, leaning further back into the chair. “You are, baby, you fucking are. Hot little mouth… shit.” She whimpered around his cock at his words, sucking a little harder as her hand stroked the rest of him. She liked that. “What is it, hm? Like when I call you baby? When I tell you how perfect you are?” His words got a bit darker. He was slipping into another headspace and Y/N seemed to be coaxing it on. 

She did a half ass nod, not pulling off his length as she continued. Harry wouldn’t have guessed in a million years that she’d be a greedy girl like this, but he was incredibly thankful that she was. “You are. Such a good girl, so gorgeous with your mouth stretched around my cock. Didn’t know you were gagging for it, baby. Should’ve told me.” He chuckled darkly. “Wouldn’t have wasted my loads in the shower before comin’ t’bed with you. Could’ve pushed into your needy mouth and let you swallow it down.” 

Y/N moaned around his prick, eyes watering slightly as she looked at him. He’d never seen a better sight. “You’re so beautiful, angel. So pretty. Didn’t know such a filthy thing could have you lookin’ even more beautiful.” His throat felt thick as his cock throbbed in her mouth. “Fuck, you don’t even know how many times I’ve thought about it.”

Y/N pulled off, panting slightly as webs of saliva connected her mouth to his cock. “How much?” Her voice was a little hoarse, but he could hear that she was desperate to know. “You- You could have. I don’t want you to waste it anymore.” There was the tiny bit of shyness coming back in. “If umm, if you think  I’m good enough at this. I’ll do it.” 

“Fuck me, baby.” His thumb wiped over her spit soaked lips, breaking the threads of spit as he caressed her cheek. “All the fucking time. S’the only thing that gets me off.” Confessions he hadn’t thought he’d be saying so soon, let alone before he’d ever kissed her, spilled from him. “You’re doing amazing. More than good enough, too fucking good for me.” He couldn’t believe she was offering. “You sure you want t’be the one to take care of it?”

“Yes, I want it. I don’t want anyone else to do it.” She pleaded. “I’ll be the best for you. Just- you can tell me and I’ll suck you or, or anything you want.” Harry tested it, gently pushing her head back towards his prick- which she immediately took back in her mouth. The perfect, wet heat bringing him back to that filthy place in his head. 

How could she think he could ever say no? She’d been his weakness since she brought him over that damn cupcake. 

“Oh, sweet girl. Anything?” He cooed. “Dangerous thing to promise me. Don’t want anyone else to do it either.” His breathing was getting harder, trying not to thrust his hips up into her mouth and make her take it all. Sure, she’d probably do it, but he still felt the need to be delicate with her. “Take a little more for me, baby. Just like- there, there you go.” He praised, mouth falling open as she did exactly what he wanted. “Gonna make me cum.” 

This felt a million times better than rubbing one out in her bathroom. His legs were near vibrating, the wet sound of her mouth taking him down and the clicks of her hand stroking his spit soaked cock filling her bedroom. This was the last thing he’d expected was her on her knees for him tonight and part of him wasn’t convinced it wasn’t a wet dream, but he was thanking whatever higher power that was up there that his sweet girl had a dirty side to her. One he wanted to be the only one privileged enough to see. 

“In my mouth.” She gasped, pulling up for a moment. “Want to taste you. Please?” 

How could he ever tell her no? 

Pushing her back down on his cock, he let his hips rise up and shallowly thrust into her mouth as she moaned around him, drooling down her chin and letting him use her the way he needed to get off. The best part was knowing she was enjoying it so much. It was a miracle he’d lasted this long already, but he attributed that to shock. She was dirty, his sweet girl, choking slightly on his cock as the tip hit her throat, but she made no move to want to stop. 

His last straw, though, was feeling her hand over his balls, whining around him as he let out his deepest groan yet. It was sloppy and messy and so fucking good that he felt lightheaded, tummy hot and legs weak as he felt himself approach his end. “Fuck, jus’ like that, your fucking mouth is perfect… fuck, fuck, fuck, baby- M’gonna cum, gonna cum, gonna-” His voice failed as his head fell back, lifting his hips as his cum began to pour into her mouth. Ribbon after ribbon coating her throat, pulling back a bit to get it on her tongue while she worked him through it. 

He didn’t realize he had so much in him, but perhaps it was just Y/N that made him cum this much. This hard. His ears rung a bit, curses leaving his mouth as he watched her mouth open and hand stroke him to see the pearly mess on her tongue. At the last little bit,he used his grip on her hair to tug her up to his face. 

“C’mere, sweet girl. Share with me, don’t be greedy.” holding her face while the other had her hair, he pulled back into his lap and her mouth to his and groaned as she licked over his tongue, sharing the remnants of his load with him. It was something a bit nasty and deprived, he knew, but Y/N merely moaned back, her clean hand curling around the back of his neck. 

The kisses slowed from frantic and hot, to softer, slow and sweet. Pecking her lips over and over again, her whimpers melted into giggled as he untangled from her hair, sliding his hand under the shirt she had on to get some bare skin on his fingertips. “Sweetest thing, most beautiful girl.” He murmured between kisses. “Thank you. Best I’ve ever had.” 

“You’re jus’ saying that.” She whispered, though the smile was difficult to wipe off her face. Obviously she liked praise just as much as him. 

“Nope. Mean every word.” He confirmed, rubbing his nose over her cheek. “Thank you, baby. Felt so damn good, can’t feel my legs now.” Harry’d never felt like this after a blowie, both in his legs and the fondness he felt for the girl. If there had been any doubts about his feelings for her whatsoever, they were shattered. He was so far gone for her, it was pathetic. 

“Good.” She smiled, feeling the kiss to his cheek. “I need to finish your skincare, though. So tuck yourself back in, cause m’gonna do that and then brush my teeth again. Though.. I can tell you’ve got a good diet. Tasted nice.” 

Though Harry knew cum never really tasted good, he was chuffed that she hadn’t minded. Even more, that she hadn’t minded indulging in sharing with him. “M’not selfish, I need to help you too.” He reminded, though she merely shook her head. 

“I’ll take a raincheck. M’so tired now, and I want to enjoy it fully.” Pecking his cheek in return, she picked up the moisturizer. “Think you need a lip mask too. Thankfully, you’re in the right hands.” 

Harry was sometimes a selfish lover with hookups and he could admit that, but with Y/N he never wanted to be that way. He wanted to make her feel good, but he could wait. It only made him anticipate it more- there would be a next time. 

“Okay, sweets.” He chuckled. “Do whatever you’d like.”

[lingeriae]

SCREAM 4 ME!

warnings - stalker-ish behaviour from my man connie, possessive and toxic connie, sexual content including: oral (r recieving) spit, pussy slaps and fingering, gore and blood mentioned, cursing, knives reader is black and female!

connie couldn't decide what pissed him off more. the fact that this bitch-made ass white boy was feeling up on you or the fact that you were allowing him to feel up on you.

his tongue poked his inner cheek as he watched the scene infront of him, you on one of the desk in the classroom with eren between your spreaded legs, a hand on your thigh and the other on your waist as he opened his shit pit to say something to you which caused you to turn away your head. it's like he started seeing red, and no it wasn't pink eye.

the sudden urge to walk in the classroom and stab eren in his throat haunted connie's mind as he continued to watch the scene, his jaw clenched shut and his hands turning into fist at the sides allowing the veins that traced his arms to become prominent. his hand reached for the door handle, intending to create the scene he had in mind with bashing eren's head in, until a familiar voice called out his name. turning his head connie comes face to face with armin who wore a concerned look on his face,

"you good, bro?" the blond asked, tilting his head at the male as he looked him up and down, stopping at his tightly clenched fist.

it's as if his whole demeanor changed in a second, face going blank while he shoved his hands in his pocket. armin's eyebrows rose to his forehead as connie nodded his head before walking away, while watching his back armin thought about how unusual his normally out-going friend was being but shaked his head thinking it was simply an overreaction.

the door for the classroom door opened, eren walked out before you did, pushing pass armin with an odd look on his face.

armin's eyebrows rose further, wondering what the fuck was up with everyone today and why you two were in that classroom to begin with. "what's wrong with him?" he asked as you wrapped your hands around yourself, looking down at your black and white converse.

you shrug in response to his question leaving armin left in the dark yet again, it was like he wasn't even your bestfriend anymore, like you didn't even trust him anymore.

but he gets it, with what's been going on in the past few weeks he wouldn't trust anyone either, but he was still your friend—or was he?

armin couldn't keep track anymore.

with a huff, armin adjusts the books he held in his hand, looking away from you and down the hall where connie stormed off to. "well, whatever you two were doing in there, connie saw and he looks pretty pissed." at this you look up, your eyes wide and your plump lips parted, the expression only confusing armin even more.

"w-what? do you know where he went?" you stammer, looking around as if you could catch sight of the brown eyed male. the blonde infront of yoou doesn't give you a verbal responce, simply raising his hand and pointing in the direction he saw connie disappear in. you mumble a quiet 'thanks' before running off in the direction he pointed it, desperate to find the boy.

breathing heavily you rest your body against a wall after having ran all over the school in search of connie and being unsucessful in your search. your phone suddenly vibrates in your pocket and you take it out, seeing a text from an unknown number.

can't wait to make u scream.

your eyebrows draw together at the text just as a ping comes in, the number sends another text but this time it's a picture. a picture of you leaning against a wall, the exact wall you were leaning on now.

slipping your phone in your back pocket you look around expression twisting in one of fear, "this isn't funny." you say outloud to no one in particular, pushing off the wall and walking away quickly.

you could feel the hair on your arms standing up, as well as your hands shaking as you placed them in the pocket of your hoodie, heart racing rapidly when you started hearing heavy footsteps behind you not daring to turn around.

the footsteps behind you sped up, and as they did so did your breathing and the beat of your heart, your throat went dry as you grew terrified of who—or what was behind you. you turned your head at the side a little to finally get a glimpse of who was behind you only to see exactly what you hoped not to.

a cloaked figure, with a blade and a mask.

you started running, taking in little gasps for air every now and then, tears building up at your lashline and your feet begining to burn in your high-top converses.

'why me?' was all you could think as the figure started running after you, close on your heel. you had never troubled anyone and kept to yourself for most of your highschool years, so you didn't understand why this mysterious serial killer was coming after you of all persons.

sure the killer killed a few of your friends, but they were all assholes who had beef with everybody, and you weren't like them. you had conflict with no one—-being the most liked girl in school.

so why you?

a squeak fell from your lips as you bumped into a large figure, almost falling on your ass before a sturdy arm came out grasp your waist. you look up to your savior only to come face to face with eren, his face morphing into one of concern as his teal eyes flickered up and down your face. pink lips parted for a split second before closing again when you grasp his shirt and pull him into a nearby closet.

eren looked down at you with furrowed brows, parting his lips to speak again but being cut off by your fingers pressed against his lips, listening for the sound of the heavy footsteps. his hands that found their way to your waist, jade eyes boring into you as you looked at the door expectingly. with a sigh you remove your finger from eren's lips, nibbling on your own as you looked up at him.

he raises and eyebrow, "what's up?" although he's confused, the tone of his voice is soft and comforting and it causes you to lean your head against his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat. his arms come to wrap around you tenderly, offering you the comfort you need and signaling you to rest your body against his. the look on his face is one of concern as he kisses your head top and rubs your back.

"t-they were chasing me eren." you whisper. too afraid to talk any louder in case 'they' might hear you.

"who?" your about to answer his question when the door of the janitor closet is flung open, the cloaked figure from before standing at the door, knife glinting dangerously as he raises it with a tilted head.

"me."

a 'slash' is sounded through the air when the killer brings the knife down, plunging it into eren's shoulder. screaming you push the figure, feeling the hard muscles underneath his coat flex beneath your finger tips as he's caught off guard and stumbles outside of the closet. it gives you enough time to close the door again, a broken cry leaves your lips as the killer begins to bang on the door furiously before a knife appears right above your arm, slicing it a bit.

you keep a firm grip on the door handle as the killer continues to bang on the door and pierce it with his knife that was painted with erens blood, tears run down your face as you watch him groaning against the wall, blood coating each of his pretty fingers. eren makes eye-contact with you before walking over to you with his hand still pressed against the wound, a hiss leaving his lips as he places his hand over yours to help keep the door in place.

"eren no y-your hurt." you whisper with a shake of your head, but make no move to push him away from the door as the banging intensifies, you only watch as his brown hair frames his pretty face as he tilts his head and gives you a pained smile. "m'okay, promise princess."

you start praying.

praying that someone will hear the loud bangings and notice the physcopath that stands outside of the door with his bloody knife and murderous intentions. your palms began to get sore and your legs feel wobbly from the fear that runs through your vains, the cut on your arm suddenly makes itself known as it begans to pulse with an unbearable pain. you wonder how eren feels if your scratch hurts so bad, you wonder if you'll make it out alive.

a shrill ring echos throughout the walls of the closet, and the banging pauses. you look at eren and he looks at you, both of you waiting with baited breaths for something to happen, your heart beating through your ears.

the sound of multiple footsteps and talking in the halls causes you to lean your body against the door with a shaky sigh, your hands shaking as you moved to open the door wincing at the feeling of sore palms against the metal.

it takes five seconds for people to notice you and eren, sly remarks on the tip of their tongues until someone pointed out the obvious.

"they're fucking bleeding! someone get help!"

an arm wraps around your middle and your hands come into contact with a sturdy chest, eyes meeting with one of a familiar honey colour.

his freckled face had twisted up with a look of 'concern'. pretty pink plump lips downturned into a frown, and his forehead frowned as his thick eyebrows drew together, "what the fuck happened?" connie asks, the question sounding so aggressive but his touch was gentle and soft as he rubbed circles in your waist and held your injured arm.

you couldn't even tell he was lying, taking that glint in his eye for worry. how could you be so fucking naive?

you don't respond, only wrapping your arms around his neck and burrying your face in his shoulder, letting all your tears flow not caring that you were getting his white t-shirt wet.

connie's hands find their way to your back, rubbing it soothingly. his lips twitching at your attention, eyes dragging up to meet eren who looked at him with a blank look. he only tilted his head, looking the brunette up and down once before pulling away from you, his warm and large hands cupping your face, eyes glittering with warmth—drawing you in deep.

"c'mon, lets get you patched up, mama."

your fingers traced figures on connies chest as you rested your head against his torso, giggling when he grunted cause you traced your finger over his nipple. eyes never leaving his pretty face, taking note of ever single detail on it. how it slightly glowed under the light of the tv, how his lashes almost otuched his cheek, how his pretty pink lips were jutted out in a frown-like manner, how his botton nose scrunched up when one of the characters on the tc said some dumb shit—silver stud shining with the tv light.

he can feel your gaze burning the side of his face, when he looks down he see's your pretty eyes gazing up at him as you do that shit with your pretty plump lips slightly parted,nibbling on your lower lips, that same expression you make when you want something from him.

"you watchin me or the movie?" he sasses, pinching your side.

you smile prettily, looking at the tv to see the killer chasing the pretty girl with a machete in his hand, and looking back at connie fluttering your lashes at him. "that shit makes my screen crawl, rather watch you and get my pussy wet."

a sound that sounds dangerously close to a whimper falls from connie lips, his eyes getting glossy and low as he stares at you with his lips parted, wetting them with his tongue while he looked away staring at the tv. he bit his lips as he looked back at you, cheeks heating up and his underwear suddenly feeling tight.

"you can keep talking your shit, im not fucking you with your crippled ass arm." he says, giggling at the offended expression you now wore. you push up off of him, folding your arms across your chest and staring a head of you instead of at him. "so I get one little injury and im crippled? ian even wanna fuck you anyways nigga-"

an arm is wrapped around your throught before you can even finish your sentence, it's warm and it causes you to push your thighs together as you suddenly feel your panties getting slightly damp. connie's expression not helping your situation at all, pink lips quirked up into a smirk and honeyed eyes were glossed over and dark with lust.

it made your body warm and tingly, heat making it's way to your face when he pulls you on top of him, his lips brushing against yours but not quite touching them while his nose rubbed against yours, allowing you to feel the piercing that sat on top of it.

"whatchu say?" he whispers, eyes holding a mischevious look as he looked at you, hands squeezing your ass. "nothin." you mumble, growing bashful from all the attention he was giving you. connie smiled smugly, rubing his nose against yours. "mmm, that's what I thought you said."

you couldn't even get to respond as his plushy lips were mashed against yours, lips smacking together as you both made out messily, almost devouring each other.

the taste of his lips was addicting, and you couldn't get enough, sucking his tongue and listening to the sweet whimpers he lets out at the mere action.

connie's hands find there place on your hips as you begin to roll yourself against his hips, feeling the tip of his dick beneath his sweatpants bump against your clit with each grind of your hips. your hands grazed his nape as you continued to move against him, smiling at the groan he let out.

"(★)," he pauses as your pussy runs over his cock once more, grunting at the feeling. "s-shit, mama stop doing that."

his voice is deep and whiny, it holds a tone of desperation but restraint. the muscle in his jaw ticks as he holds you waist in place, slouching against the couch and taking deep breaths before giving you a stern look.

"im not about to fuck you when your injured," you know he means it from the look he gives you, and it makes your pretty lips tip down in a frown, pushing off of him to sit down on the couch not laying on his chest anymore.

you can feel his eyes burn holes in the side of your face as you keep your eyes on the tv, suddenly intrested in the man using a chainsaw to slice through the girl while she was still alive.

"okay."

it goes quiet after that, connie only continues to stare at you, guilt pooling at his stomach as he continued to stare at you. licking his lips, he sighs and slouches more in the couch, running a hand down his face before looking back at you.

connie knows all you really want is his comfort, especially after what happened—but he's still upset that you made eren touch on his body like that. he knows all you want is a distraction from everything, but he has to punish you a little.

but maybe he can punish you and pleasure you at the same time.

a boy-ish smile makes it way to connie's face show-casing his pretty dimples, the look is almost innocent, but his eyes clear up the whole 'innocent' act, showing clear signs that man was about to fucking devour you.

the tap that's delievered to your thigh causes you to look up, a shudder goes down your spine as your eyes meet connie's glossed over ones, full to the brim with lust like you would be in a few minutes.

"what?" you say it so meekly, it makes connie's grin widen.

in a quick motion, your back is pressed against the couch, mout falling open to let out a gasp whilst connie holds unto your legs, spreading them open.

"connie--" your words are cut off by him pressing a kiss to your pussy, face heating up as it flutters from the simple action, "lay down and lemme eat your pussy." he mumbles, mouth still pressed against your clothed cunt, a hand pressing against your stomach as you attempted to sit up.

"b-but you said," he drags your sweatpants down in one big swoop, throwing the sweatpants over hs shoulder in a wuick motion, tongue swipping at the corner of his lips, hazel brown eyes glaring at the wet spot in your panties with an almost anger look on his face. "know what the fuck I said, don't lemme have to tell you to lay your ass down again mami." your arousal almost floods your panties hazardly, your brownskin suddenly feeling hot as you looked away from him to watch the tv as a distraction only for the screen to go turn black.

a hand is wrapped around your throat again, turning you to face connie, his nose against your cheek as he kisses you, pulling away for a second allowing you to feel the tiny huffs of air he lets out. "ion want you watching anything, or anyone else but me." he whispers squeezing your neck a little before pressing his lips against yours.

your overwhelmed by him, feeling him touch you all over your body. squeezing, fondling, kissing. it was getting to you, your pussy specifically, and you couldn't help but want him to live under your skin.

he quickly takes off your panties, smirking giddly as he places them in the pocket of his sweatpants. your plush and wet pussy now on display for him, hole fluttering every now and then around nothing but air.

"shit ma, you so wet..." he sucks in a breath as he brushes a finger over your clit, your body jerked in reaction.

he gives you one last kiss on your pussy, finally leaning down and placing a his lips on your warmth.

wet muscle is felt moving up and down on your pussy before connie's mouth encloses on your clit, gently taking the bud into his mouth and sucks on it.

"pussy taste so fucking good," he mumbles, mouth still on your pussy, the deep vibration of his voice sending chills throughout your whole body. your hands grip his head as he continues to make-out with your pussy, eyes almost crossing from how good he was making you feel. "mm, connie."

"yeah, that's right say my fucking name mama, gonna have you screaming for me in a minute."

too fucked out and lost in the pleasure, you don't even take heed to his words, only focused on the feeling of his mouth working against your pussy like magic, gripping his head harder, the spiky hair of his buzzcut not bothering you one bit.

your back arches off the couch with a gasp as connie unexpectedly pushes a finger in you, his mouth still on your pussy as his slender fingers curl inside of your spongey walls causing you toes to curl in ecstasy. connie only smirked as you begin grinding unto his face, fingers thrusting in and out of you, finding the perfect rhythm to drive you over the edge. "feels so good con," your voice is breathy and high as you whisper out the words, holding unto connie as if your life depend on it.

"yeah?" he asked, licking his lips, hooded hazel eyes connecting with yours from between your parted legs, fingers never stopping once. "you gonna cum for me?"

"uh huh." a hiccup left you, tempting connie to smile once more as he increased the speed of his fingers, his plump pink lips attaching themselves back to your cunt.

he swirls his tongue around your clit while his fingers pump in and out of you, watching with awe at the creamy clear liquid that encases his fingers.

as he continued you could feel the knot in your stomach quickly tightening, about to snap at any given time,your back arched off of the seat of the couch, thighs shaking as your vision became blurry with tears.

"gonna cum, connie m' gonna c-cum slow down!" you whine, trying to push a away his head. you freeze at the look he gives you, having no time to think about it as your orgasm washes ov4er you like a heavy wave.

connie doesn't stop as you cum, slurping you up as if you were his last meal. he only stops when he witnesses the trembling of your thighs, sitting up and giving you a kiss on your cheek before leaving the room.

"where you goin?" you mumble with a hoarse voice, lifting up your body to watch the muscles of his back move as he walks, he stops and looks at you over his shoulder.

"gon get you some water." you mumble a soft okay in responce before leaning back in against the cushion behind you, hissing as you felt something hard poke you in your back.

"this fool don't ever know how to clean up right." you mumble as you lift the pillow,

the item beneath it causes you to pause your movements, your plump lips parting in shock as confusion and fear ran through your veins.

a ghostface masked laid beneath the pillow, a speck of blood on the cheek that almost stared at you mockingly. you place a hand over your mouth as you felt tears make it's way to your lashline, your body backing up off of the couch and causing you to fall.

"ma?" the sound of connie's voice causes you to freeze, and you hurridely get up off of the floor and move away from him. his eyebrows furrowed as he looked you up and down, "wha-"

"you’re r ghostface." a shudder goes throughout your body at the blank look he gives you, his head turning to look at the mask on the couch befor elooking back up at you with a sigh. he places the water he carried on the table, you watch his every move carefully, making sure he doesn't get too close to you.

"ma, c'mere." he says, putting his hands in his pockets, his honey coloured eyes staring at you with an unreadable expression on his face.

"no."

his jaw tightens at your responce, head tilting as he runs his tongue over his teeth.

"m' not gonna ask again." it was almost like a threat, and it only scared you more.

your heart almost felt like it was about to fail as you stared at connie for a few seconds before running towards the door.

dumb fucking move.

a hand suddenly yanks you back, making your back rest against connie's sturdy chest.you draw in a brreath as a knife is suddenly placed at your throat, slowly tilting your head up so you could meet connie's eyes.

they glinted dangerously, somehow holding you captive. "don't fucking run from me, you crazy baby?" his words caused your breath to hitch, your legs shaking with fear as you looked up at him.

"don't try that shit again, you hear me?" you nod your head slowly causing connie to let out a hiss, shaking his head. "words mama, know you know them."

"I head you con." you say, tears filling your eyes.

connie licked his lips, showing off his dimples as he smiled at your obedience.

"good girl, and if you try that shit again, ima make you scream."

[noahsmuse]

adore you

✮ PAIRING: noah sebastian x reader

✮ SUMMARY: headcannons about how i think being in a relationship with noah would be like !!

୨୧ he’s a gentlemen first and foremost !!!! he holds your shopping bags, will literally RUN in front of you just so he can hold the door for you, pulls your seat out in restaurants and opens the car door for you when your getting inside and out of the car

୨୧ he notices everything new about you, did you re-dye that one part of your hair ? he knew it immediately. he’s a very observant guy and always compliments how you look, saying that your hair, makeup, outfit etc. looks amazing especially if he can tell if your experimenting with new looks and products

୨୧ he remembers EVERYTHING about you, no matter whether good or bad. just like how he’ll poke fun at you whenever you trip over your own feet and claims you need to be wrapped up in bubble wrap. BUT he does remember things like what you usually order at different restaurants, what your favorite kind of drink is and exactly how you like it

୨୧ doing fashion shows for him after you get mail or come back from the mall !!!!! as soon as you’d walk through the door with your new clothes, he’s SAT. and ready for you to try on your new wardrobe, he thinks you look great in everything and is a VERY good hype-man

୨୧ since he’s off social media & doesn’t have his own, he makes it a point to follow you from the band account and also likes every single new post you make, sometimes will even leave silly little comments in relation to whatever you just posted….he’s REALLY down bad for you

-> because of the new found fame for the band and since he deleted his social media accounts, he 100% has a private instagram where he only follows you, the band & crew and some of his other close friends. he posts SO many photos of you and puts some on his story almost everyday, you also had to help him learn how to take good instagram photos. (he’s so proud whenever you actually post one of the photos he took)

୨୧ while him & the band create new music for their new albums, he absolutely loves it when you just sit in there with him. you don’t have to do a single thing but just sit there, he does like to hear your opinion on what you think about the new songs and if anything needs to be changed. sometimes you’re even part of the album, he mixes in your laughs and sometimes even your moans into the songs

୨୧ when he gets invited to/buys tickets concerts, you’re always the very first person that he asks if you wanna come with him (especially if he knows that a band or artist you both like is playing), and obviously you do ?!?!

-> whenever you both are around big crowds, he’s got his hand on your back or holding your hand, guiding you through the big groups of people

୨୧ he loves to go on small little vacations/getaways in the little bit of time that he has off from touring and making music !!!!! especially because of how much time the both of you would be spending together, making memories and exploring somewhere new :)

୨୧ even though you’re more than welcome to steal any of his hoodies, he always saves you a hoodie/shirt from the online drops. and when you visit them on tour, you just HAVE to get a shirt from each tour (more than half of your entire closet is probably bad omens merch at this point)

-> and of course he loves when you style bad omens merch to match what you wear everyday, he also eventually lets you become one of the models for online merch drops (with some photos of you together which makes the fans go CRAZY)

୨୧ for arguments, i don’t think that you both would have very often. since the both of you have learned that if you sit down and have a genuine conversation about what things/topics that could cause conflicts can avoid those heated arguments

୨୧ the days when he gets back from tour, usually you both just order something or sometimes make a meal to eat with him and he LOVES to just lay down, share a blanket and cuddle you after being gone for so long while watching an anime you both like ♡

[aboutkiyoomi]

009. the kenma makeup party | antipathy

a/n: ignore timestamps especially in this chapter and ik the texts in kenmas tweets are in y/n's pov but ignore it pls. i'm just a girl. also i realized i've been missing so many ppl who asked to be in the taglist, for future books i've come up with a more organized way for that.

"where are you going?" kuroo asked, throwing his head back over the couch to awkwardly watch kenma attempt to discreetly leave the apartment.

"going to..." he started before going to a low whisper. "y/n's house."

"you're going WHERE?" kuroo's eyes nearly popped out of their sockets before he flew off of the couch to stand in front of the door. he immediately sent a sos text out to the groupchat, something the roomates had adapted as a form of notification system to meet in the living room.

"WHAT HAPPENED?" bokuto yelled as he barreled into the living room at unnatural speeds.

"YOU SOS'D! IT WASN'T ME WHO BROKE THE DOORKNOB TO THE CABINET." hinata squealed as he halted at the scene of kuroo awkwardly block the door.

"i fuckin knew it." bokuto muttered before cutting a side eye at the orange-haired man.

"our trusted bro, kenma, is attempting to sneak out to see y/n." kuroo starts, looking at the men wide-eyed but knowingly. "at her house." he states plainly. the eruption of laughter and scolding filled the air of the apartment.

"how'd you manage this one bud?" came from hinata. "i'm proud of him." bokuto threw out, impressed smirk on his face.

"ok before you guys call me insane, she asked ME to come over. we're filming a video for her youtube channel. you know, for the whole fake dating for clout thing." kenma started, hiking the bag up on his shoulder, irritation burning across his face.

"honestly.....we're proud of you man. this is the most normal you've been about her. good luck." kuroo smiled slightly, patting his back encouragingly as he moved out of the way of the door.

"yea, we know you wouldn't do anything insane to get in her house. i just wonder what this means for the be-" shoyo starts before bokuto pounds on his shoulder knowingly, in an obvious attempt to shut him up.

"whatever. i'm going, i don't wanna be late." kenma started as we walked out of the house quickly.

meanwhile, in y/n's house, she found herself tidying up the common area of the house. going as far as dusting that one stupid bookshelf that sakusa bought to hold his trophies and other various awards of her roomates. silently, y/n padded into her office/studio and flopped on the couch, choosing to set up the camera to be prepared for the video.

for some reason, y/n felt this utter sense of swirling nerves in her stomach at the idea of kenma being in her presence for what she knows is the first time. not to mention, the house just so happened to be conveniently empty as kiyoko decided to head to meet an old friend of hers, sakusa decided to get some practice reps in with his teammate, atsumu and tendou was at the bakery, conveniently making a new apple pie recipe.

y/n's nervous thoughts were halted at the rapping of knuckles against the door. suddenly, the swirling feeling in her stomach dropped and she almost felt frozen in place. before she could overthink, she willed her body to trudge to the front door and breathe deeply before unlocking the door and pulling it open to reveal kenma kozume in all of his natural glory.

kenma smiled goofily, awkwardly shuffling as you stared at his lanky figure. hair pulled back attractively in a sort of makeshift ponytail, hoodie thrown haphazardly over his body but hugging his arms in all the right places and the oversized sweat shorts that revealed the slight expanse of his beautifully built calves.

"gonna let me in or do ya wanna look at me sum more?" he asks, tongue poking at his cheek gently. you're immediately shaken out of your trance when you remember who you're gawking at.

"you disgust me. but come in, i guess." you mumble the last part before moving aside to allow him inside.

"so, gonna tell me what this video is." he asks as he removes his shoes and places them neatly on the shoe rack.

"follow me." you reply, choosing to ignore his question as you lead him to your studio. his eyes begin scanning the room and observing the scenery before he speaks. "no..." he starts but your grin has already lit up your entire face.

"we're doing your makeupppp." you smile as you step aside to reveal the camera set up at your vanity area, all of your makeup splayed across the desk and some items you purchased to suit kenma's complexion.

"just put me out of my misery." he whines, placing his backpack on the couch that was pushed against the wall.

his whines went ignored as you rushed him to sit down and finished up the final tweaks to lighting before getting ready to turn the camera on but you spoke before pressing the record button.

"look....i'm an ass to you and you're an ass to me. the fans like that dynamic but we also have to seem like we like each other. soo...keep that in mind." you start, nervous as you fiddle with the tripod in front of you.

"when this camera turns on, i'm not y/n. i'm your girlfriend...so don't be too much of an ass." you finish, eyes glancing up to catch his golden ones.

"got it, princess." his voice is smooth and warm, sending sparks and goosebumps along your skin. your eyes roll to mask the simple effects of his nickname. you'd die if he realized how much you genuinely enjoyed hearing it, partly because you weren't sure why in the first place. and with that, the camera turned on and the act began.

"hi my loves!! today i'm here with a very special guest." you spoke, speaking animatedly in front of the camera, blocking kenma from the frame.

"my stupid boyfriend, kenma." you moved to the side, revealing kenma, who's cheeks are burning an adorable shade of pink.

"surprisee." he speaks monotously, eyes wrinkling slightly as he waves his hands playfully.

"i know a lot of you have speculated but we're here to finally come clean." you smile, looking away nervously.

"quit yapping and tell them what we're doing." he smiles quietly before placing his hands a bit above your waist, shocking you deep within your core. the feelings of the calloused pads on your clothed waist sent shockwaves up your spine and you couldn't help but jump slightly.

"rudeee." you mumble before moving to stand behind the chair, revealing the full vanity.

"today, i'll be doing his makeup. i'm excitedd, i've wanted to do this for weeks but he's been too shy." you spoke, explaining further about the plan of the video for your viewers before beginning the makeup.

the conversation flowed seamlessly, to the naked eye, it would be insane to assume anything other than love between the two of you. flirty comments covered in natural sarcasm and faux-pas anger. you knew the video would do numbers, solely because your fans know that you've never been one to talk about love and relationships on your channel.

as you're setting kenma's face with a powderpuff, you use your fingers to gently pull up on his chin, aiming for a better angle to ensure the product was fully blended out. as you focused, your eyes wrinkling in the process, kenma took the time to shamelessly admire you. golden eyes searched yours before falling on your lips and flicking up and away from you.

"see something ya like, love?" you ask, smirking cockily as you pull the powderpuff away, eyes falling to his again.

"definitely." he muttered, shamelessly lost in the expanse of your featherlight, gentle touch and soothing presence. your eyes widen, grateful that you're facing away from the camera as you feel warmth spread to your ears.

you tear yourself away, scanning the vanity table for the next step in an attempt to recover from the embarrassing, nervous gnawing of your lip. you turn back, remembering that you're filming and you push away the feelings of nervousness and allow yourself to be bold...for the sake of the video, right?

the video comes to an end, you laughing ridiculously hard at the sight of kenma in full glam, even allowing you to put lashes on him which caused him to look like a veteran pageant prince. your giggles began to mix with kenma's pleads to take pictures for the groupchat later. as you go to turn off the camera, kenma begins searching for the micellar water you had offered him.

you whirl around and grab it from him, pouring it on a cotton pad before pausing in front of him.

"can i?" you ask, holding the cotton pad up, implying that you wanted to do it for him

"be my guest, princess." he starts, leaning back comfortably before adjusting himself in the seat. your heart jumping at the sight of just how beautiful kenma kozume was, even with a full face of exaggerated makeup. it was something about the distinction in his features, the way his hair lazily fell into his face and the lazy smirk that constantly graced his lips.

you connected your phone to the speaker before playing some music lightly and began your work of scrubbing the makeup away, revealing kenma's soft skin. as you wiped away, kenma found the courage to rest his hands gently on the space above your waist, testing to see if this was okay. you sighed softly, feeling that swirl of nerves deep in your stomach before deciding, this is fine. how else would you be able to pretend to be his girlfriend if you weren't used to his touch. you reasoned like this and leaned into the touch, pushing locks of his hair away from his face before pulling it between your fingers.

"do you ever think hmm maybe i should fix my overgrown ass roots." you mumbled, inspecting the hair quietly.

"mmm i do but i haven't found a good stylist and i know i'd fry my hair off doing it alone. sooo, i just let it grow out." he mumbled, rubbing soft circles into your skin through the fabric of your tshirt.

"well, i know how...and this looks fucking ugly." you grumbled, throwing away the remainder of the cotton pads over his shoulder into the trash and looking down at him.

"wanna do it now? i'm not in a rush to leave and you could use it for more content." he shrugs, face neutralized as he glances at you softly.

"i mean...i do have bleach.. and it would be good to have some extra content with you." you mumble, thinking quietly.

"you don't have too but i thought it would be helpful and i would hate for my girlfriend to think i'm absolutely hideous." he laughed slightly at his own joke, removing his hands from your waist. your eyes widened slightly at the feeling and the lack of warmth.

"fine... it is helpful. so, thank you and i don't find you repulsive. just ugly." you shrug before walking towards the door, beckoning for him to follow you.

"whatever helps you sleep at night, princess." he sighs before following you into the bathroom silently.

the jokes and conversation flowed as you mixed the bleach mixture and began applying it gingerly to his roots, being careful to not overlap with the already bleached part. the two of you conversed of many things; about how you ended up moving in with your roomates, hinata and sakusa being on the same team and other random topics came about.

as he sat on the toilet seat, hair wrapped up neatly in a shower cap. he decided to ask a question, eyes continuously glazing over your appearance as you scrolled aimlessly on your phone.

"so, how are you gonna repay me for this extra content. i'm expensive to book, ya know." he joked, placing his phone on the counter and arms crossing playfully.

"i could beat your ass. if you're into that kinda thing." you smile, not looking up from your phone to see his dismissive eyeroll. chuckling to yourself quietly, you look up and see his lazy smirk has grown into a genuine grin. it brought those swirling nerves up from your stomach and into your throat.

"i could uh- we can go make food. or order something..on me." you say, eyes widening gently.

"hmm i like that. can we make pancake sandwiches?' he questions innocently.

"kenma....what the hell is a pancake sandwich?" you ask, eyebrow raised in a concerned fashion.

"it's this thing shoyo came up with. make pancakes and then eggs with some pork belly and then you make a sandwich like thing. it's sooo fire. i'll show you how to make it for me." he speaks, pressing the alarm off of his phone to signal it was time to rinse the bleach from his hair.

y/n was beginning to question if kenma kozume was actually an asshole or if he just had asshole tendencies. but then, she looks back on the events of today and wonders if it was her, who had been the asshole the entire time.

taglist: @3lectraheart @fairyrots @chemiru @i-am-trying-i-promise @herteatime @shosuki @sereniteav @sunarots @babyyitsval @theweirdfloatything @ast4rg1rl @rockleeisbaeeee @punkhazardlaw @starykari @giocriedpower @cherryblossomly

[soraviie]

tugging at his hair.txt

━ type: bts x gn! reader  ━ navigation

━ about: angst, fluff, (themes of) smut, the holy trifecta  ━ pictures taken from Pinterest

━ a/n: may or may not have seen Yoongi's insta pic...may or may not be feeling very normal about it

━ previously posted on soraviii

NAMJOON: Atypically, your boyfriend was actually quite the whiny guy. Friday evening, time - 20:30. Thanks to some uncanny miracle, Namjoon was free this night and you’d been eager to soak up each other’s company. You sat largely silent, tucked into his side and openly staring, merely breathing an infrequent “yeah” and “no way” so he wouldn’t suspect you were not listening. Though you were not listening, catching the jumping cadence of his offended voice only with the tip of your ears. Far too engrossed in admiring the glowing shade of his skin and furiously working cheeks, you felt your mind slip. Never before have you thought that someone resting on the couch, passively aggressively minding on chips could make your heart bleed with love. But everything about Namjoon was soft and comfortable. 

Unwittingly, you zeroed in on the tuft of his hair, poking out from underneath his hoodie. Without fully registering, you trailed your fingers down the hood, pulling it down and proceeded to tug at the back of his hair. Namjoon’s cheeks froze and with mouth full, he glanced at your side. 

“What are you doing?” 

“Don’t know,” you shrugged. “You’re compelling like that.”

He returned back to the chips, completely unperturbed by the looks of it. 

“You need to condition them more,” noting absent-mindedly, you played with whatever strand called your fancy. He rolled his eyes, pinching your bare thigh. 

“Ow!

“You should be whispering sweet nothings in my ear,” he grumbled. “Confess how much you adore me, how hot I am.”

“Right,” you agreed, leaning into his expectant expression. “Your hair is also greasy as fuck. You should shower more.”

Violently, he hurled you into the decorative pillows scrunched from your combined weight, frowning at the easy laughter bubbling from your throat.

“I’m dating a bully,” he muttered bitterly, yet when you nosed at his neck, he craned it with no small amount of enthusiasm, playing with the hem of your shirt. 

“Sure are,” you purred. “Can I play with your greasy hair more? Pretty please?” His eyes lingered, firmly set on the playing movie, but you reckoned his neck did grow increasingly warmer. 

“You’ll do it no matter what I say.” 

“‘Cause you’ve never said “no” to me.”

At that, he heaved a tormented sigh. 

“True. I’m but a lowly servant of love.”

You chuckled, pushing the black hair away from his forehead, messing it up. After a moment, with a barely concealed grin, he offered:

“Maybe now I can card through your leg hair.”

“Not funny,” you glared at him but Namjoon merely sniggered further on. 

“A little funny.”

YOONGI: Your hand was practically aching as it laid listlessly by your side, partially sinking into the plush sofa of his studio. Fully drowned in work, he sat by the monitor, one hand coming to rest by his lips, the other - tinkering with the beat. And his hair - the hair - curled around him like a ring of halo. He drew a heavy sigh, reaching up to muss the chief objects of unease further. Yet you couldn’t just follow the delirious caprice. Yoongi was a guarded man, he liked his personal space and, despite how much you longed for it, you couldn’t just tug at his long hair. The relationship was still fresh and had to be trodden like a melting glacier - nice and easy. Crossing the itching arms over your stomach, you huffed in discontent. 

“What?” he suddenly hummed, and you recoiled, assuming he was blissfully ignorant of your lingering stare. 

“Nothing,” you replied, but his chair turned, a pair of disbelieving eyes falling your way.

“Just say it.”

“I want to tug at your hair,” the sentence practically rushed out as though your body was actively disregarding your own orders. 

“Why don’t you just do it?”

You nibbled with your fingers suddenly feeling rather foolish. 

“I want to be respectful,” you muttered underneath the nose, and a second later, you grasped what sound Yoongi was making. Laughing.

He was laughing at you.

Resting his forehead against the desk, you saw his shoulders wag in muffled glee. 

“You know,” he faced you, eyes twinkling in amusement. “Most couples grope each other the first chance they get.”

“Oh, shut it,” groaning, you sank into the sofa, only for all objections to wither into the ether once Yoongi lowered his head with a soft “come ‘ere”. 

Cautiously, fearing the dream could shatter at the moment’s passing, you made your way to where he sat and with bated breath curled your palm around his fluffy curls, giving them a tender yet generous pull. Something akin to instant relief flooded your system, making the tips of your fingers tingle. 

“Enjoying yourself?” Yoongi wondered, the curve of his smile suggesting he was barely holding himself back from teasing you into oblivion. You tugged at his hair once more, this time harder, and a prolonged moan left his lips, startling you both. 

“Not as much as you, it seems,” you smirked down at him, enjoying how his eyes flitted away from you, self-conscious red dusting his cheeks. 

“Just go for it next time,” he grumbled shyly, making no move to pull away. “Before you give yourself an IBS.”

JIN: He knew what you wanted by the frankly terrifying gleam hidden behind your eye. There was something entirely transfixed passing your expression as you stared at his head with steely determination. Ordinarily, Jin was content with your inexplicable obsession. Rather this than pulling at his cheeks, he reckoned, however, now…

“I won’t pry ________ off of me,” he whined, gazing into a mirror. Even to his completely normal and unscrambled brain, the permed curls resting atop his forehead seemed inviting. Fluffy. Moussed. Reasonably asking to be tugged. 

“Oh, what a torture,” Namjoon dragged aridly, perched in the corner, not unlike a sullen owl. “You have someone to go home to who loves to play with your hair. Poor you.”

Graciously ignoring the seeping sarcasm, JIn breathed a tormented sigh. 

“I know right.”

Namjoon merely rolled his eyes, returning back to his quiet moping. 

When Jin crossed the threshold, he found you immersed in laundry, folding it and turning to greet him home like always.

“Hello!” you exclaimed cheerfully. “How was your da-”

Frightfully, he swallowed. Your expression grew distant and in spite of his jerky movements, your attention never wavered from the top of his head. 

“May I eat at least?” he mewled weakly and you nodded just not before actually thinking about it. 

After eating in peace, the last one he’d get for the evening, Jin slowly trodded to the bedroom, shoulders hung low in premature defeat. On the other side of the door, you were waiting for him already, blinking expectantly from underneath the covers. After a prolonged groan, he obliged your whims and settled his head on your lap. To get it over with. 

Instantly, your fingers delved deep into his curls, tugging and twirling them to your heart’s strange desire. 

“How cute,” you gushed. “So fluffy!”

Jin closed his eyes, trying to suppress the blossoming smile. Perhaps, he didn’t entirely hate being coddled in such a fashion but you didn’t need to know that. Unbeknownst, to him, you were more than aware as, in spite of his efforts to mask the pleased grimace, he failed to conceal the ears burning bright red. 

HOSEOK: “Sorry,” he said, squirming and glancing to the side. “But no.”

Well, no was no and you just had to learn how to live with it. Every time your hand subconsciously reached to grasp a strand of his hair between your fingers, not really meaning anything good or bad, just doing so out of instinct, you reigned it back, forcing the treasonous hand to ultimately fall unused. It may or may not have taken you a whole year to timidly wonder aloud:

“Why don’t you like for me to touch your hair?” 

Hoseok was practically asleep - his voice came crackling from the other side of the bed. 

“It’s nothing personal,” he sighed, cracking one eye open, glancing at your demure expression through the dark. “It’s just…” then he fell silent. Only after a pregnant pause, one long enough for you to assume he’d succumbed to sleep, he casually brushed it off:

“It’s just a preference.”

He rolled on the side and the conversation ended there. 

“Hey, ______________!” Jimin greeted you brightly the second you took a step inside the partially hidden makeup studio. Being nearly four in the morning, filming’s end, sparsely anyone was present and even those few people didn’t bother acknowledging you through the haze of insomnia. 

“What are you doing here?” 

He smirked, all cheek as always. 

“Could ask the same for you. It’s really late.”

You shrugged, enjoying the distraction of easy chatter. 

“Couldn’t sleep. Supposed Hoseok would appreciate some company home.”

“Ah, dear ______________,” Jimin snaked a hand around your shoulder. “Geniuses think alike.”

“Oh no,” you laughed, scurrying away from his treacherous hold. “Don’t try to seduce me into being your fangirl. It won’t happen.”

What was with Jimin and his tenacious will to make himself your bias you did not know and you never quite asked either, although it provided plenty of icebreakers across the slew of accidental meetings. 

“Shame,” he drawled. “Maybe better though. Hoseok would kill me.”

To properly lament the wretched situation, Jimin sighed and reached to rake a hand through his hair. Hair that had been growing out and now sat shining with silver highlights. Unwittingly, your hand jolted by the side of your thigh. 

“You want to touch?” he offered, sporting a grin too devious for your peace of mind. You probably shouldn’t but what’s the big deal…It’s just hair…

Doors to the room sprang open with a great bang and you crossed gazes with Hoseok, instantly swallowing in guilt. With expression previously lax, now growing cloudy, he flitted between you and Jimin. 

“What’s going on?” with narrowed glare, he questioned, voice falling in a carefully curated tone which was, of course, far more menacing. 

“Just waiting for you superstar,” Jimin laughed thinly only to wither when placed underneath Hoseok’s chilling frown. “On second thought, I’ll get home on my lonesome. Goodbye!”

And without giving anyone the time to even blink, Jimin had already disappeared into thin air. No, he was definitely not winning any favours from you.  

The drive back home was spent in fraught silence, with Hoseok’s hands gripping the wheel so tight, every now and then it heaved a maltreated scream. Any minute soon the wrath bubbling underneath his skin would surge like pressurised water out of a geyser. However, Hoseok wasn’t a jealous person, even less when it came to the members. Both were trusted explicitly. Was it stress perhaps? 

Finally, he crumbled. 

“What is it with you and hair?” he sneered sharply. Straight away you bristled at the unspoken accusation. 

“Nothing. Better yet what’s with you? I can’t even talk to Jimin now?”

“You went to him with the one thing, I couldn’t give you,” he countered as the car surged with tension.

“I did not go to him!” you squalled in frustration. “Are you even hearing yourself?!”

“It’s our thing!”

“No, it’s mine! You hate -!”

“It’s because of my ex, okay?!”

An awkward silence settled in the space between you. Red light pooled through the windshield.

“She liked to play with my hair,” he explained, anger abating as it was quickly seized by contrite embarrassment. “And I was afraid that if you’d do it, I would unwillingly think of her. You deserve better than that.” 

You bit your lip to stop the growing smile, simply breathing: “I see.” Then - 

“However, how would I know what you’re thinking?”

He stared ahead, lips thinning identical to yours. 

“Probably wouldn’t,” he sighed. “But I’d feel at blame.”

You hummed and gazed outside the window, still battling the blossoming smile, though it was nothing compared to the warmth churning within your chest. A hand reached for yours and Hoseok guided your fingers towards his hair. It was finer than you realized but nice. It was Hoseok after all. 

“Are you thinking of her?” you gently pondered. 

“Not at all,” he whispered in a breathy voice, eyes briefly falling shut. “You’re the only one for me.”

JIMIN: Instead of happiness, his lips pursed into a thin line, gaze becoming evasive. 

“Thank you, but I’m too tired.”

“I’ll help you.”

“I…I’m not in the mood for sex either.”

“It’s not that,” you sighed forlornly, literally feeling him slip through the cracks of your fingers. “Just…get in, and I’ll take care of you,” in a smaller voice, you added. “Like you do of me.”

Standing in the cracked gap of the bathroom door, he contemplated for a second, before breathing a heavy exhale, one expressing the entire weight of the world. Water sloshed as he got in the bath you drew up, and the window soon was covered by a thick layer of condensation, the deep black night growing matted behind it. 

“You don’t have to do this,” he tossed over the bare shoulder, but you brushed his concerns away. 

“I want to.”

“If it's because what I said -”

“It’s not.”

“- then I was out of line.”

“You were not.”

“I take it back.”

“You shouldn’t.”

“But -”

Every time he spoke, his head turned to steal a glimpse of you, perhaps entirely on instinct, the water doused you with a heavy wave, drenching the floor and dumping the rose petals out with it. You grasped his head between your palms, keeping him still at least long enough to apologize sans the pain of his scrutinising gaze. 

“I’m sorry,” you confessed, letting your forehead rest on the back of his neck. “I won’t ever let you feel like taken for granted.” 

He sat unmoving for a long time and you gasped shakily, trying to swallow the budding tears. Well, obviously you would self-sabotage the only good thing in your life. Only naturally at this point in life...

…but this was Jimin and it didn’t matter whether you tucked yourself away in a locked room or an ocean away, he’d extend you the same kindness you were so eager to return. Pulling your arms around his neck, he smiled, laying a tender kiss upon your trembling knuckles. 

“Nothing to forgive,” he muttered. “We were never in the wrong.”

You choked back a sob. Nonetheless, the night was still about him. 

“Right,” you sobered up, pushing him lower in the water. “Just try to relax.”

“Are you planning to kill me?” he teased tiredly. “Besides, it’s a bit difficult given that my cock is just…out here,” he gestured vaguely at his lower part and you chuckled thinly. 

“Nothing new to me. This is just…romantic.”

“Well, you certainly know the befitting aesthetic,” pointedly, he peered across the dozens of scent-free candles littered over every available surface of the bathroom and the pink petals now displayed haphazardly between the bath and the grey mat beside it. 

Pressing a handful of shampoo in his hair, you hissed with mock annoyance: “oh, zip it.”

You kept working in now pleasant silence. Peace was in the house, at least it was until…

His groan was near explicit and watching Jimin throw his head back, nuzzling deeper into your hands, you knew you’d never forget the sight. It didn’t even seem like he’d registered it and soon enough the curiosity overwhelmed you. You rinsed his hair and then scratched lightly across the scalp. Another moan, even longer and somehow so filthy you could swear your entire body flushed. 

“So…” he chuckled, strangely nervous. “Did I just give you a quick way to control my entire nervous system?”

You laid a kiss on his nape and the water rippled from his shudder.

“Sure did.”

The moons now adorning his spine were entirely at fault here or so you insisted, tugging his styled hair between your fingers, occasionally scratching just to see the struggle to keep his eyes open. 

“The stylist is going to kill you,” he warned breathily but Jimin was never more grateful for losing his composure, that day in the bath than he was at this moment. Like grime washed away by a wet towel, your presence eased his worry into the void, while your fingers twirling his hair kept him there. How strange that such a small thing could do so much but then again if it did not, then would Jimin have bought a ring that now laid in his jacket pocket, heavy and searing like the infinite weight of Cosmos.

“Worth it,” you hummed. He couldn’t agree more. 

TAEHYUNG: Frankly, the question of your enjoyment never made it into the equation as before you could even wonder of the idea, Taehyung had shamelessly thrust his head into your lap. 

“I don’t wanna,” you whined by now not needing a verbal order to know what he craved. 

“Too bad,” retorting without so much as an ounce of empathy, he grasped your fingers, bringing them down upon his head. Five minutes later he was snoring on your legs and no amount of force could rouse him, divine or otherwise. It was a language of his, one he talked exclusively with you. 

Trees breezed past the rolling car and sitting still, you watched them blur into wide, rushing lines. At first innocent, his palm intertwined with yours, gaze locked on the road ahead. You hummed. He liked to hold hands, and so did you, only for yours to suddenly be submerged within his dark curls. 

“Seriously?!” you yelped, and he chuckled with no small amount of glee. 

The door smacked behind, or it would have if Taehyung had not been hot on your heels the entire way home. 

“I’m sorry,” Taehyung mumbled, by now so many times it didn’t remotely even sound like a proper sentence. 

“Not accepted,” you sneered, yanking off the jacket, maybe tearing a button or two in the process. “You embarrassed me! And for what?! Some childish caveman display of jealousy?” 

The rest of the insult is expressed through a hardened scowl. As you jostled, enraged and unthinking, to peel off the stifling layers, Taehyung enclosed you into a hug, towering above you, his head lowered into the crook of your neck. 

“Please, don’t be mad at me,” pitifully he muttered, a warm breath ghosting over your collarbone. “Take it out on me but promise you won’t be mad afterwards.”

Without even quite thinking, you wrenched out of his grasp and seized his hair, yanking it harshly towards you. At the back of your mind, panic took root - were you hurting him? Was this not wrong? But Taehyung grew positively limp, pliant, Adam’s apple bobbing nervously as his widened eyes tracked your every movement. 

“I’m really angry,” you whispered with a frown. 

“I’m sorry,” uselessly, he whimpered when you grasped at his locks. “It’s just…”

All you have to do is tug again for a high-pitched squeal to rip from the depths of his chest. “Don’t want to lose you.”

Something in the near incoherent way he breathed it, made your heart soften. 

“Why are you crying?” you asked quietly, wiping the stray tear off his cheek. 

Early morning hued the sky pink as you lay beside each other, relishing in the muted stillness of the room. 

“Don’t know,” Taehyung sniffled. “Felt like it.”

You reached to brush his hair and soon enough he was slumbering again - all tears faded into the dawning cold. 

JUNGKOOK: Frankly, you didn’t grasp why in situations such as these the other partner always offered sex. You were far more willing to simply lug this nightstand at Jungkook’s head. Without knocking you cracked open the doors to his gaming room, discerning the explosive sounds of combat swirling around the room. 

“Jungkook, you promised!” you complained and he held out a hand, gaze locked on the game. 

“I’ll be there soon, babe,” he lied in between strangled curses. “Just one more round.”

He’d muttered that already two fruitless hours ago. 

“No, now!” you threatened, coming to stand by his chair, watching the battle unfold, thoroughly unimpressed by it. He offered some incoherent noise that lacked any meaning, and in a flash of swirling annoyance, you yanked at his hair, forcing his eyes to land upside down upon your face. 

“Now.”

Most people would hastily become upset at such a gesture but the little masochist grinned from cheek to cheek, expression gaining a certain twinkle. You groaned at his satisfaction. Couldn’t even playfully torment him. The brat enjoyed it. 

“Okay, folks,” he spoke into the headset, with your hand still firmly latched in his shaggy hair. “It’s been a pleasure, but I’ve got to go.”

Someone hollered in the chat but it went entirely unheard. Pushing the chair away from the desk, he reached to pull your other arm to rest on top of his thundering heart. 

“What’s up, babe?”

For someone who was jerked by the roots of his hair, Jungkook appeared entirely too delighted. 

“I need you -”

“Oh, you need me?”

“To hammer in the nails to the nightstand. Brat,” saying so, your grip on his hair grew harsher. All that came of it was Jungkook’s raspy laughter, eyes briefly fluttering shut and lips carving a sharp line in his dimpled cheeks. 

“Couldn’t you just do it yourself?”

“Well if injury is to happen, I’d prefer it is you, not me.”

“Liar,” he smirked. “You cried when I tripped.”

Traitorous heat snuck its way onto your cheeks. 

“I thought your leg broke,” you muttered before nudging him outside. “Now get to working.”

“Yes, my liege,” he curtsied, proceeding then to wring his tattooed hands around your waist, making you hobble like some sort of overtly humped creature. His nose quickly delved into its reserved spot in the crook of your neck. 

“Always smell so good,” hazily, Jungkook muttered and you shook your head at his antics. 

“You’re so weird.”

“Says the one who's constantly trying to dom me by hair pulling.”

“It’s not a dom thing!”

“Sure, baby,” he rasped, planting a wet kiss against your neck. “Whatever you say. Just remember you now owe me three hair pulls in return.”

© soraviii/soraviie 2022-2023

[brokenpieces-72]

Does it End?

Cod Gangster AU | Navigation

Note: Just wanted to say, holy shit you guys really enjoyed this. I’m surprised. Originally I joined tumblr to read fics and post some of my art, with my own writing just being a shot in the dark. I expected maybe a couple likes, and that’s it. Really appreciate this and don’t worry there will be more. Thank you guys so much for your support.

For a moment, just a moment you’re in bed. You know this bed, and you know the man holding you. It’s your father, holding you close, and telling you stories about heroes and villains. There is a crash of thunder above you and hide under the covers. Your father gives a small laugh, before lifting the covers, to find your trembling form. He hides underneath with you.

“Come here Y/N.” he says wrapping you in his arms. “No matter whatever happens… you’ll always be safe. I promise.”

You wake up… in your room. You’re in warm dry clothes, and your hair is still a little damp. There’s a few blankets layered on top of you. Along with a familiar feline, who has curled up next to your pillow on the bed. The cat lets out a soft inquisitive meow, sniffing you.

“Hi…” you croaked. You feel tired still, and a little sore in the arm. When you move it you wince in pain. Once you get some of the blankets off, you check to see bandages around your shoulder. Well at least it was done properly. You don’t hear much outside your room, and slowly get out of the bed.

Despite the flannel and tank top, you reached for a hoodie that had been left on the hook on the door. You have to ease your arm into the other sleeve, but get it on, shivering a little. Slowly you open the door.

No one in the hall. You’re about to step out when you hesitate. Did you let them down again? They know you gave up so much on Makarov that may actually bring him to justice. It was for them, but it was still important. Had they released them anyways? Alex swore he would only let them out if you didn’t return. But if the rest of the guys had pressured him… maybe they wouldn’t do that. You hadn’t spoken to any of them for days, running around behind them, and their arrest. Surely your actions proved something but it didn’t rid you of the guilt. None of this would have happened if you kept to yourself. If you’d stayed in line.

The cat squeezes through the small opening between your leg and the door, hurrying out to the door way leading to the main living area. She stops and turns back to you as if asking, “you coming?”

You take a deep breath. You know them. They know you. If they wanted, you’d been willing to move out. At the very least you should say sorry. You open the door and step out, closing the door behind you. There are hushed tones as you slowly walk down the small hallway. You poke your head out as you enter the main living area. Kyle was in the kitchen, with the rest of the guys around the table, with Alex and a laptop. You consider running for the door.

“Hey.” Kyle says, coming over to you. He gives you a gentle hug, avoiding your shoulder and hug him back. The relief is euphoric. He pulls away and looks at you.

“Go sit, I’ll bring your tea.”

You nod and go over to the couch, as the guys all turn and look up, as the cat follows close. Johnny gets up and hugs you, and you wince. He forgot about the bullet wound.

“Sorry.” He mutters. You nod, knowing he means well. You sit down on the couch, and look at Alex.

“You’re sure?” Alex asks. You know what he’s asking. The truth is… you didn’t have anything on Makarov. He thought you did and he left the possibility to fill his mind.

“Send them to Graves.” You direct. “He’ll clear everything.”

Alex starts typing, and Price folds his arms, seemingly hiding a grin. “You don’t have anything do you?”

The whole room drops into stunned silence. Many eyes are on you but you only meet Prices, if only for a few brief moments. “Nothing… I don’t know where any of it is.”

“What are you saying?” Rudy asks. Johnny is sitting in the arm rest, looking at you expectantly.

“Never had anything on Makarov, I wasn’t looking for anything on him.” You admit. “The photos are for you guys.”

There is a bit of tension, as they start wondering what you’re talking about.

“To exonerate you. Prove you were there under my direction, undercover. Your records for the raid are clean.” You tell them. The tension is gone now, but it’s still quiet. You had nothing on Makarov.

Simon shakes his head, and then you notice his shoulders bob.

“You cheeky git.” He says. Kyle hands you your tea and you sip it. They’re all pretty impressed. But they know they have plenty of work to do. No one says anything for some time.

“You did a good job.” Alejandro says, breaking the silence.

“We have plenty more to do.” Kyle adds on.

“True but for now, we rest and recover. Make sure everything gets sorted and then we can plan our next move.” Price says. Hearing that, you slouch back, pulling your legs up on to the couch. You certainly need some time for yourself.

John was sitting out on the fire escape, smoking one of his cigars. The brand he used for special occasions, and avoiding death, being cleared of charges, yep it was special enough. You did so much just to get them out. Alex told him about what had happened with Nolan. The one thing he never wanted for you in this job. Still you were walking around, alive. He could argue it was a bloody miracle.

When they brought you home he feared the worst. That you would never open your eyes. His only hope was you’d get to see your father again. You went in after him to save him. Not thinking and just reacting, forgetting to get the keys until he was almost out of breath. Then you nearly got yourself killed. Putting so much on the line for people who never wanted to see you again.

“Oh!”

Price looks up over his shoulder to see you halfway on the fire escape.

“Sorry I can go.” You say quickly, back tracking.

“No I don’t mind.” Price assures you, facing forward again. You come out and stand next to him, coughing when you smell the tobacco. Damn it was strong. Price gives a half smile at your reaction. You lean over the railing with him, that red scarf around your neck, a mug held with fingerless gloves and your beanie covering your ears.

Silence again. You think this is how Price communicates, relying on body language to express himself most times.

“I’m sorry.” You say. You didn’t want silence, it just made everything more difficult. “I should’ve left Graves out of it. Just…I don’t know, I screwed up, I know I did. Everything went to shit because of me, you nearly die-everyone nearly died because I opened my fucking mouth. I’m sorry.”

“…I forgive you for opening your fucking mouth.” Price says. “You know how you can make it up to us?”

“My bag is packed already, I’m getting a ride from Alex.” You assure him.

Price looks at you.

“Well I hope it’s to pick up the bag from your apartment.” Price says. You look at him.

“I fucked up,” you argue.

“Yeah, and now you’ll be making up for it. That unit is gonna get bought up my Milena one way or another. You won’t have anywhere to work on your sketches, you’re out of the job.” Price points out. “And I made a promise.”

You sip your tea, letting it warm you a bit. Your favourite blend as well. Your hands tremble a little, as you shift your weight from your bad shoulder.

“You may not be your dad, but I can tell you from experience… you’re exactly what you need to be.” Price says putting a hand on your back. You nod, feeling the tears welling up. “Proud of you.”

You sniffle and he pulls you in closer, giving you a close half hug, resting his head on yours. It’s not a perfect ending, but this wasn’t something neat. You were going to get dirty, but the world would be cleaned. Hearing those words though, from John, you felt something you hadn’t in a very long time.

Makarov is pissed off. Graves came in announcing there was evidence that supported the 141’s innocence. Not only that but he still didn’t have his file, since you never coughed up any location.

Right now they would be recovering, and likely try to hide away. Regroup and think of a new strategy. It gave him time as well. Time to figure out everything he could find on you that Graves hadn’t removed from police records. Graves may be on a long leash, but Makarov would shorten it in due time.

You sat outside again, a blanket around you, and the world moving about as it always did. Without a word Johnny came out to join you, sitting next to you on the steps. The only thing between you two is silence and the busy streets of cars and strangers below.

“Why didn ya ever walk away?” He finally asks. You turn to look at him. “Cracked ribs, two bullet wounds, nearly drowned, got beaten by cops, got beaten by Alejandro, beaten by Nolan… nearly got beaten by me… and you stayed?”

You’ve always known the answer to this question. It’s still one you have to think about though. At first you would have replied asking where you were supposed to walk to. You’d given Johnny your answer before, saying it was to protect the people in the city, to clean it up because you couldn’t expect others to do it.

“For the longest time, I kept thinking I had to be like my father. Become a cop, stand up for the innocent, and protect the city from wrong doing. Everyone expected me to be one, and I eventually did too.” You exclaim.

“But ya not.”

“I’m not.” You say. “Graves was expecting me to be like my dad. Raising me to be like him, training me, even took me under his wing when I became a cop. Graves showed me how to be my dad… but you guys… you taught me how to be myself. How to find my own answers.”

Johnny smiles. “You figured that out on yer own. Just needed a chance to realize it.”

“Thank you.” You say, leaning into him. Johnny puts an arm around you. Neither of you know what’s coming. You have plenty to face, you know you will. You’re not alone. The 141 will stand with you, and you with them. Nothing will truly stop you.

You thought.

Taglist: @yourlovely-moon @kaoyamamegami @h0n3y-l3m0n05 @sans-chara @1mommyrose4ever29 @smitten-haematite-quartz @talia-the-gemini @yuki2129 @whitetiger846 @graystorm444 @chibiduck @reaperxxxxzz @danielle143 @sobbingnshtting @cringeycookies @cryingpages @dcnocap207 @reaper-chan666 @bestbookfriends @thriving-n-jiving

[makeitmingi]

Cause Baby You're My Muse [Chapter 25]

Genre: Romance, Idol!AU, Music, Slight angst

Pairing: Mingi x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Producer!Reader, IdolLyricist!Mingi, IdolProducer!Hongjoong, Idol!Seonghwa, Idol!Yunho, Idol!Wooyoung, Idol!San, Idol!Yeosang, Idol!Jongho, cameo(s) by other celebrities

Summary: You always preferred producing underground, having an unknown face and governed by your own rules. But when you start freelancing for idol groups, you say goodbye to your lone wolf lifestyle as you learn to work with idol producers and lyricists.

Word count: 3.2K

"Yes, thank you." You received the package from the delivery man and bowed to him. He bowed his head and walke away with his clipboard tucked underneath his arm.

"What's in the package, baby?" Mingi asked, staring at the big box you were pushing through the living room.

"I ordered some clothes." You replied simply, continuing to push the box into your bedroom. Mingi followed you curiously but you unknowingly shut the door in his face. He blinked at the wood in front of him before chuckling.

"Is it a secret? Did you buy me a surprise present?" Mingi opened the door, poking his head in.

"It's not a secret or a present for you." You said as you grabbed box cutters from your drawer to open the box. Mingi sat on the bed, watching you with curiosity as you opened the box.

"Hmm..." You grabbed your phone, opening the app to check if all your purchases were there. He watched you take out the skirts and dresses.

"Are you... changing your style?" Mingi scratched his head.

Not that he minded but skirts and dresses were rare in your closet. You were someone who dressed in comfy street clothes, hoodies and jeans or sweats. Mingi liked that relaxed side of yours.

"No." You shook your head, taking out some blouses to match them to the skirts you laid out.

"Then why the suddenly bulk buy of skirts and dresses? I mean, I think you would look good in whatever you wear but... these are a little out of your character, no?" Mingi tilted his head, lifting the thin strap of the sundress. You snorted at his words, knowing he was trying to compliment you despite his confusion.

"I thought I should dress a little more... girly... when I meet your mother. I don't have much formal clothing or 'girly' clothes." You confessed. That was when it finally clicked for Mingi.

"Ah, baby. You don't have to change your style just to impress my mother. I appreciate the effort but just be yourself. Be the person I fell in love with." Mingi said.

"W-What are you saying now?" You flicked his forehead, flustered by his sudden gushy words.

"I'm serious." He wound his arms around you to pull you to him.

"I'm 100% supportive if you wanna change your style but change it only if you want to. Don't change it for anyone else, not for me, not for my mother." Mingi grinned.

"Thanks, Mings. You always know what to say." You chuckled, running your fingers through his hair.

You still were going to wear a dress at least though, maybe just not the absurdly floral-y ones. You knew common courtesy and you were not going to wear sweats when meeting your boyfriend's mother for the first time.

"I guess I'm going to return most of these." You sighed at the stack of clothes on your bed.

"I'll help you." Mingi said. You went through the stack, putting aside the pieces you were going to keep. Mingi helped you put the returning pieces back into the box.

"Maybe I'll wear this? With a leather jacket." You held up the maroon skater dress, going to the closet to retrieve the jacket.

"Looks good. I'll match you, I think I have a maroon shirt or hoodie somewhere." Mingi said excitedly.

"Great." You laughed, walking out of the room.

"Baby?" Mingi stood behind you as you cut the tags off the dress to throw into the washer. You hummed in question but he just came to wrap his arms around you.

"Why? What's wrong?" You turned to face him, reaching up to cup with his cheeks with your hands. Mingi leaned down so you could reach him. But his cheeks blushed pink as he buried his face into your shoulder. You couldn't help but laugh at him. He lightly squeezed your waist.

"Really, what's wrong, Mings? And don't lie to me." You said. You hand stroked the back of his head comfortingly.

"I just like being with you. I never thought I would have anyone to bring home to my omma and yet, you're putting in all this effort to impress her." He rambled.

"Why did you think you wouldn't have anyone to bring home, hmm?" You asked.

"Because I didn't think anyone would like the real me." He lifted up his head so he could stare into your eyes.

"The real you?" You tilted your head.

"I may look confident and all that on stage. But I'm always afraid when people know the real me, they'll just be scared away. The me that needs people to take care of, the me who gets overwhelmed easily and gets anxiety..." He said.

"Oh, Mings..." You softened. It broke your heart to hear Mingi speak of himself in such a way, like he was a burden. But he was far from, he had become your rock and brought such joy to your life.

"The real you is the best you, Mings. And that's the person I came to love and trust." You said.

"Even if I am not the most handsome or funny one?"

"You're the most handsome and funniest to me so I have no idea what you're talking about." You shrugged, a playful glint in your eye as you said that.

"Gosh, I don't deserve you." Mingi chuckled, leaning down to press his lips to yours.

"Stop, don't say that. Because honestly, you deserve a lot more than me." You told him. He shook his head, disagreeing with you.

"You're perfect." He said.

After that little moment between you and Mingi, you ended up making ramyeon for dinner, both of you not really wanting to cook. Mingi stayed by your side as you did some work before going to bed. You surprised him by putting the headphones on him, letting him listen to your draft tracks.

"Is this the draft for the drama OST?" Mingi asked as you played the track for him. You nodded your head. He bobbed his head along to the beat, listening to it intently.

"I like it." Mingi gave a thumbs up.

"I'm going to have to send in my first draft to them soon. If they like it then we'll start discussing which artist they want to bring in to record it." You explained.

"Do you have any suggestion or idea for which artist you want for the track?" He tilted his head.

"Not yet. I thought they would choose the artist or have the lead actors perform it but apparently they want my input." You shrugged.

"That's good. At least they value your advice enough to ask you.." Mingi said.

"I guess..." You agreed. Mingi didn't volunteer himself to perform it because it was a vocal piece. He liked that you didn't ask him to do it just because you were dating him. The both of you were professional in separating work and your love lives.

"Are you expected to write the lyrics for it?"

"Nope. They have a lyricist who will write the lyrics. I only need to provide the instrumental track. You know that lyric writing isn't my thing." You laughed.

"That's why I'm always taking down my surroundings in my notes on my phone. You never know when they'll turn to lyrics." Mingi said.

"I don't know if I can ever let myself be that openly vulnerable." You said honestly.

"I understand." He smiled, reaching out to stroke your head.

You finished up your work quickly, not wanting to waste any more time that you had with Mingi. Before sleeping, Mingi decided to do a facemask with you.

"Argh! It's too cold!" Mingi winced as you smoothened the facemask over his skin.

"That's the point! They said it's better to keep it in the fridge for that cooling effect." You giggled, making sure his mask was straight then turning to the mirror to adjust the mask over your own nose and mouth. With the left over serum, you rubbed Mingi's hands in between your own.

"I'll set a timer." You said and set the timer on your phone. Mingi wrapped an arm around you, pressing his cheek to yours and snapping a photo in the mirror.

"Mings! Now it's messed up." You laughed as you readjusted his mask since Mingi made his stick to yours.

"Worth it for the photo." Mingi defended.

RINGGGGG

"Oh no! It's Wooyoung calling." You panicked. You left Mingi to walk to the bedroom, closing the door before answering the phone.

"Indigo, why aren't you turning on the video? I can't see you properly!"

"I'm doing a face mask now and look terrible!" You said. You weren't lying but the real reason you didn't want to turn on the camera was that you were afraid Wooyoung would spot one of Mingi's things in the background.

"What nonsense are you saying now? So what if you're doing a face mask?! It's only a chat with me anyway. There's no one around to see you plus we do face masks all the time here!"

"Anyway, did something happen that you called me?" You tried to change the subject so he wouldn't keep insisting.

"Not really... I just felt like I haven't called to speak to you in a while, you know? Just you and me."

"Oh, I guess we've both been quite busy. But yes, I do miss our chats." You chuckled.

"You do?"

"Of course. You're one of the first members I became close with. I wouldn't be so close with the others if it weren't for you and Hongjoong." You stated.

It was true. Wooyoung and Hongjoong were the first two members that you spoke with and clicked with. Wooyoung, especially, tried hard to become friends with you, calling you to check on you and always coming to your studio to chat with you. He helped you get close to the others too.

"Aww, yeah, I remember when you first came to KQ. But you got along well with me and the others so quickly, you practically became one of us."

"I did. Actually, Wooyoung ah, are you free tomorrow? Shall we go have coffee? Just the two of us." You suggested.

"Yes, I am free tomorrow! I know a discreet cafe where we can meet. I'll send you the details!"

"Alright. Shall we meet at 11?" You asked.

"Mhmm! I guess I'll see you tomorrow Indigo~ Sleep well!"

You guessed that Mingi was eavesdropping on the conversation because the moment Wooyoung hung up, Mingi entered the room. He gave you a look, which made you confused.

"Why are you looking at me like that? Also, it's time to remove the face masks." You said to him, dragging him with you to the bathroom. Mingi didn't say anything, letting you peel the mask off his face and massage the serum into his skin.

"Why are you going out with Wooyoung?" Mingi asked as you removed your own mask.

"With us being together, I've been home a lot more and haven't really caught up with him. I feel bad, like I've neglected him a little." You replied.

"Are you going to tell him about us?"

"Do you want me to?" You asked back with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes. So he stops having so much physical contact with you. I should be the only one that kisses your cheek." Mingi crossed his arms. You couldn't help but burst out laughing.

You weren't going to tell Wooyoung, not yet. You didn't tell Mingi but the first people you wanted to tell were Hongjoong and Seonghwa. They have taken care of you the most since you've been at KQ like parents or older brothers, you felt like they should be the first people to know from you.

"Let's meet your mom first then talk about telling the other Ateez members, okay?" You said. You wanted to be fair to Mingi too, not make him keep it a secret only for your sake.

"Okay." Mingi finally smiled.

-

You and Mingi were going to split ways, he was headed back to the dorm while you were going to meet Wooyoung. You wore your coat and slipped a new mask on before wearing your shoes.

"Wait, one last one." Mingi held your arm, preventing you from leaving. His arm slipped around your waist as he pulled down your mask and pressed you against him for a kiss.

"I thought the last one was the one after we got changed?" You held his shirt, a teasing smile on his face.

"I get as many kisses as I want. I'm the boyfriend, not Wooyoung. Can't believe you're that excited to meet another guy." Mingi grumbled. It was cute how Mingi always 'reminded' you that he was your boyfriend now, as if you would ever forget it.

"Wooyoung is not another guy. He is my good friend and your brother." You patted his shoulder. Mingi rolled his eyes, giving you a tight hug.

"I'm going to be late!" You laughed.

"Fine. Let me know when you reach the cafe, okay?" He pulled up your mask, carefully adjusting it on your face.

"I will. Be safe on your way back." You tip toed to hug him properly before he wore his cap and mask. After that, Mingi left first so you could lock up and you wouldn't be seen together.

'I'm boarding the bus now! I'll be there in 20 minutes. - Indigo'

You sent Wooyoung a text as you were getting on the bus. During your bus ride, you listened to some Ateez songs.

'Okay. I'll wait inside for you. - Wooyoung'

It took a while for you to find the cafe since it was in quite a secluded area and it looked a little rundown. But when you pushed open the door, you were greeted by the smell of frehsly brewed coffee. There were mainly old people around, chatting over coffee. You bowed your head respectfully as you ventured deeper.

"Indigo. Over here." Wooyoung raised his hand and stood up. You went over to him and gave him a greeting hug. He squeezed you, smiling brightly. You sat opposite him in the small booth seat.

"Did you order yet?" You asked.

"Nope. I wanted to wait for you." He grinned, sliding the small menu over to you. You pulled down your hoodie as you looked at the items listed on the menu.

"I'll get their drip coffee." You turned around to see the old man making fresh pour over coffee by the counter.

"Want food?"

"Why don't you just order something and we'll share?" You suggested. Wooyoung nodded and went to the front to give both your orders to the cashier since there was no wait staff around.

"How did you find this place?" You asked as Wooyoung sat down.

"Jongho and I go around to a lot of coffee places since we're the biggest coffee drinkers in the group. We just happened to stumbled across this place. It's well hidden, the coffee is good and the patrons here don't really care that we're idols." Wooyoung explained.

"It's a nice place, the vibe is very relaxed and I like that it's away from public eye. I would come here again." You smiled. Wooyoung's eyes sparkled at your words.

"Right? And the coffee's good too, wait until you try it. The owner does it all to order, on his own." Wooyoung said.

"I can't wait for our order to be ready then." You replied with a chuckle.

When the owner rang the bell, you and Wooyoung went to the counter to get the food and drinks. For food, he ordered a mini sandwich set with a side of french fries.

"So, how have you been? Honestly." You asked Wooyoung.

"I've been okay, have my high and lows, which is pretty normal for me..." Wooyoung said as he stirred his coffee.

"You know even if we're busy, you can always come to me when you're feeling down, Woo. I'm here for you. It's okay to feel down, you don't always have to put on a brave front. No one is expected to always be happy, all the time." You reached over to hold his hand, squeezing it with reassurance.

"The only thing I have is my dance. I don't really have any other talents compared to the others." He sighed. This reminded you of the conversation you had with Mingi last night.

"You're a lot more than just your dance. I'm sure I'm not the only one that feels that way." You said.

"You're a great person, you bring so much light when you enter a room. You're kind and friendly to everyone you meet." You continued.

"Stop... You're making me shy." Wooyoung mumbled.

"Like I said last night, I don't think I would have been able to form such a good relationship with the other members if it weren't for you." You smiled.

"That means you trust me, right?" Wooyoung asked. You nodded your head slowly, not really knowing where he was going with this.

"Let me put it this way. If I didn't trust you, you wouldn't have been the first person to know about Haneul. I would not have asked you to go pick her up alone. I wouldn't have removed my mask in front of you." You said.

"So if you were dating Seonghwa hyung, you would tell me, right?" He finally got to the main point of his question. You choked on your coffee at his question.

"W-What?" You grabbed a napkin to wipe your mouth. Although you tried to maintain your cool, your heart was pounding in your chest.

"Are you dating Seonghwa hyung?" He asked more directly this time.

"No, I'm not dating Seonghwa. Why would you think that?" You tilted your head.

"Because you're suddenly close to him and seem to stick to him a lot more... Even more than you stick to me or Hongjoong... At first I thought it was the captain but you two are too much like siblings. Then I've been suspicious since he became more protective of you at song camp." Wooyoung shrugged.

"Have I? To me, Seonghwa is an older brother, just like Joong is. He's just better at comforting me than Joong is. I'm sure he looks at me like a little sister too." You replied.

"You wouldn't lie to me...?"

"No, I wouldn't lie to you. I'm not dating Seonghwa." You said. Technically, you were telling the truth. He asked if you were dating Seonghwa and you weren't. You were with Mingi.

"Is that why you asked me out? To ask me if I'm secretly dating Seonghwa?" You chuckled.

"N-No! Of course not. I know you've been working hard and I wanted you to destress a little... And I could catch up with you too." He explained.

"Well, thank you. I guess it's just going to get busier from here, preparing for the new song and album." You shrugged.

"It will be for all of us. But don't forget to rest and take care of yourself too. None of us like to see you sick. It worries all of us." Wooyoung told you. You softened at his words, Ateez has really become your family.

"I won't, don't worry. I hope you all practice and train safely too, with no sickness or injuries." You smiled softly. Wooyoung rubbed the back of your hand with his thumb.

~

Series Masterlist

[dariaslookalike]

Needing Miller pt 5.

Summary: It's a shit hole of a world that you're living in, and it gets even shittier when you're ambushed in your sleep. It's a slippery slope that leads you from being tucked cozily in your sleeping bag to joining the raiding group lead by the most infuriating (and intimidating) man you've ever met. You need to survive, above all else- either in this group (without smacking its leader over the head), or in the world alone after somehow escaping. Easier said than done, when your mind loses all sense of focus, tactics and skills the second that Joel Miller rolls up his sleeves and shows his godforsaken forearms.

Warnings: Violence, swearing, adult language, mature themes, eventual smut, female protagonist, no reference of y/n

Rating: 18+ MDNI

Word Count: 3.5k

A/N: woohoo update lol. hopefully another update by end of may but im just a girl and this world (completing assignments that i was given two months to do) is too hard :'3. no beta readers so soz for any mistakes

Next Chapter:

Masterlist

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You don’t talk to Joel for two weeks. Not one word. 

It eats him up inside, and you relish in that knowledge. He’s stubborn but you’re worse. He still makes you walk beside him as the group traverses through the city, trying to minimise whatever conspiracy he thinks might occur with Tommy. You simply nod and walk beside him like a soldier led to the firing line.

You walk along an abandoned highway, large cement dividers down the centre and overgrown shrubbery covering the furthest lanes. The lanes are cracked, and rubbles juts out from where the barriers had crumbled under the onslaught of bombing and mayhem in the outbreak. There is no movement, or the bustle of never ending traffic, or incessant honking of horns that you recall. The chime of songbirds and whistle of the wind has replaced them. Now, it is simply quiet, and still.

You walk through the empty husks of cars, feeling only the pang of your blistered feet in your shoes. The skin tears and weeps against your shoes, and you feel it split further again, staining the worn, holey material of your socks. Every so often someone from the group will run towards you, and you tense, bracing yourself for a deadly grapple. Your knife is always within reach of your hand, but like a scornful lover, each time you touch it you are reminded of its shortcomings; reminded of the blade digging into a shoulder, tearing through your cheek, useless and flimsy in your palm. Instead they veer around you, talking to Joel and pointing back to cars that hadn’t yet been picked over. The cars offer little value outside of small finds- a matchbook that hadn’t moulded yet, a first aid kit only half open next to a too-small corpse, and to your delight, a heavy winter jacket. 

Joel takes the jacket from the man who had found it, not so quite snatching but not asking either. The man doesn’t look surprised, or even offended, and his eyes flick to yours before he turns and follows his path back. 

Joel turns to you, eyes boring into yours when he raises his hand, the jacket clutched in his fingers. 

You reach forward and take it, trying not to brush against his fingers, or worse, look at the sheer size of his fucking hands in comparison to yours. You shake the jacket out before quickly putting it over your thin hoodie, which has seen better days. Dark black material and lined on the inside, it instantly breaks off the chill wind that had been ripping through you and you zip it up. This winter hadn’t started with blizzards or ice, but still your breath plumed in front of you in soft clouds.

Joel scoffs. “No ‘thank you’?”

You tilt your head at him and stare, but your mouth remains in a thin line. 

He rolls his jaw, and glares at you, stepping closer to put distance between the both of you and the rest of the group. They’re still picking over the cars, certain that this area hadn’t been combed over properly by others. You see the dark mop of Tommy’s hair poking out from a faded blue sedan, but he’s simply scavenging.

Joel leans over you and you try not to startle when you realise how close he had gotten. He glares down at you, scowling. 

“You’re not gonna be able to ignore me forever.”

Your eyebrows draw in and your gaze hardens with what you hope he reads as Bite me Miller . 

He reads you loud and clear, and scoffs, shaking his head. You try to keep your gaze angry, and stubborn, instead of taking him in now that he’s standing so close to you. You try not to memorise the way his tan jacket sits on his broad shoulders, or how his beard has grown longer, or the crease in between in brow as he glares at you, or the rise and fall of his chest as he thrums with annoyance. You try not to.

“Let it go, Dollface.” He spits, a wolfish flash of his teeth. “Get over yourself.”

You say nothing, and he stares at you for a second too long as if he really thought that pathetic attempt would break your vow of silence. He turns, storming off down the highway.

He tries again two days later, when you sit beside Tommy at the fire. The group has settled for the week in a dishevelled restaurant, and you warm your hands at a flaming pile of broken chairs and table legs. Earlier, when you had pointed at a scurrying rat, two of the men had grinned. Now, a skewer of fat rodents roasts atop the flames, and Tommy laughs at you when you scrunch your nose up. 

“Drumstick or wing?” He asks, elbowing you in the side and pointing at the rats.

You wretch, even if your mouth waters. “Surprise me. I’d rather not know what I’m eating.”

Tommy laughs, raising a hand to scratch at the stubble that was growing across his face. “Not exactly ‘finger licking good’ but damn it’ll do.”

You laugh in agreement but the moment of hunger is quickly forgotten when Joel comes to stand beside you. You look up at him, and quickly wipe off any trace of a smile. 

“Clean your knife and come to the back.” His words are gruff and short, and he doesn’t stay to tower over you, instead turning on his heel and striding out of the swinging staff door to the back of the kitchen.

You glance at Tommy, but he shrugs. “No clue. Better do as the boss says.”

You roll your eyes, but push yourself to your feet, ignoring the curious stares of the group. You untuck your knife from your jeans and wipe it down with your shirt- there’s nothing else to be done. 

The door swings behind you, and the kitchen is a lot less impressive then you’d imagined. Dusty, and very much stained, stainless steel countertops and stoves, and littered rubbish that seemed to be present everywhere in the abandoned city. 

Ryan leans against a countertop and offers you a small nod of his head. You open your mouth to speak but quickly close it when you see Joel, leaning against the large mirrored wall with his arms crossed over his chest. 

You get an unsettling feeling in your gut, twisting and rolling around within you. It tells you that the both of them are crazy and are going to stick you on a skewer to roast beside the rats, but Ryan pats the countertop beside him. “C’mon. I’ll take out your stitches.”

You only remember your cheek then. The pain and swelling were a faded noise in the background of your body, and it no longer bled or weeped through the dressing bandaged to your face. Your tongue instinctively touches the inner side of the wound, feeling the jagged flesh and thread that was sewn through. 

You nod, and walk over to Ryan, pushing yourself up to sit on the counter. Your legs dangle over the edge and looking down, you remember your knife. Oh.

You look back to Ryan, who waits expectantly and you hesitantly offer it to him. He takes it, thanking you quietly and moving closer. 

“It’ll feel weird when I pull them out, but it shouldn’t hurt.”

You nod and he reaches to you, peeling back the tape and taking off the dressing, but you can’t find it in you to watch as he works. Instead your eyes wander off.

They land on Joel, and you curse internally. He wasn’t just casually leaning against the wall, he had picked the one spot in the room that would be directly in front of you.

So, if you wouldn’t speak to him, he would force you to at least look at him. 

He looks straight at you, his dark eyes almost black in the dim kitchen. His hand grips his bicep, the fingers taut over the muscle. You almost want to laugh with how desperately he is trying to be impassive and brooding, but instead you just hold his gaze. You force yourself to not wince or flinch as Ryan brings your knife to your face and notches the tip under the knotted thread.

“Healed up well.” He murmurs beside you, but he is focused on his task at hand. You barely even register blinking as he cuts each stitch meticulously, and pulls the thread through your cheek. There’s a slight dribble of blood, but no torrential flow.

Ryan huffs out a sigh, and you flick your gaze to him. He smiles, and you can imagine him now, working in some hospital, all white coat and combed hair, as he says “Alright, all done. Just don’t mess with it, and it’ll be fine.”

Your lips tug up and you dip your head in thanks. He doesn’t wait for a flowery response, and instead claps his hands together, turning and walking out of the kitchen. You look back at Joel, and his head is tilted, still observing you.

Something coils and tightens deep within you, spurred on by the silence and tension stretching between the both of you. You grab your knife and push yourself off the countertop, standing.

“You look good without the patch, Dollface.” 

His voice is quiet, and you wouldn’t have been sure that he had even spoken if it weren’t for tighter, tenser grip on his bicep. Your traitorous eyes dip down to his lips, and like a tonne of bricks, the memory of him against you, his hands on you, his lips on yours, is slammed into you. He knows what you’re thinking about, based on the slight tilt of his head and how his own gaze drops for a fraction of a second, before coming back to your eyes.

He notices the shift in you as well, when you not only recall the memory of the kiss, but afterwards. Recalling his regret, his embarrassment. Recalling how repulsive you must be to him that only a near death experience could overload his brain with so many endorphins to make him think that kissing you even resembled a good idea. 

Your gaze breaks from his to over his shoulder, and you lock eyes with yourself. A dark jagged scar runs down your right cheek, from the apple to an inch above your jaw. Terry’s last words were a promise to make you ugly, to scar you so everyone else would see it. You flush with shame and hatred, and something makes the back of your neck burn when you think of Joel, and his stubbled beard speckled with your blood.

Joel was trying to bait you. Trying to anger you, trying to rile you up and get you to break your petty silent treatment by yelling and screaming at him. 

You stare at the scar, at the red hue, at the path it carves down your face. And you force yourself to breathe, to not curse yourself, to not cuss out Terry’s ghost in Hell, to not cry and give in to the misery that this wound had given you. 

You drag your gaze back to Joel, and his eyes are still on you. Still watching. 

“I mean it.” His voice is rumbling, echoing quietly off the steel. “You’re beautiful.”

Baiting you. Lying to you. Trying to get a rise out of you. 

Bite me Miller .

You turn and push past the kitchen doors, returning to the fire to sit beside Tommy and the charring rats. 

You don’t speak to him for another three weeks. It allows for a lot of inner contemplation as you walk beside him in silence. 

You decide to stay, for now, or at least until you figure out what else you could do, where else you could go, who else you could be. No longer were you waiting for Ryan to free you from your stitches or for your cheek to heal past the stage susceptible to infection. Now, you were here of your own accord, and this was wholly new, uncharted territory to walk through.

But… this was a good arrangement, and it benefitted you. You got food, warmth, a somewhat trusting eye over your shoulder as you slept, and all you had to do was follow whatever instructions were barked at you- and so far it was nothing. Just weeks of distancing yourself from the area of the city that had grown infected, weeks of stocking up for the winter. 

Some of the men had been sent elsewhere by Joel. He had ordered them while you were trying, and failing, to fall asleep in a corner. Even still, he had kept his voice low, his words hushed. Days later, the men returned with dried splatters of blood on their clothes, but with new supplies. They don’t leer at you, or really acknowledge your presence at all, but the sight of them, with split knuckles and worn faces sent a disturbing chill down your spine. You didn’t want to ask where, or who they were from. So far, Joel hadn’t instructed you to do anything except walk beside him.

You had to admit, to the small (or very large) petty part of you, that this situation benefitted you more than just addressing your basic needs. It gives you ample opportunities for great personal satisfaction each time you annoy Joel.

You like to believe your silence is driving him insane by the time the group moves again, never settling in one exact spot in the city. You live for it, for the stupid scowl on his face, for the roll of his eyes, for the muttering as he near-sulks beside you.

He’s clearly more annoyed after hearing you talk to Tommy for the past week. After you had gotten your stitches out and returned to the fire, Tommy had whistled, low and loud.

“Damn, Dollface.” He said, and you didn’t find the same mocking that Joel had. “Looking good.”

Not beautiful , simply good. It reminded you of the rat skewers, and shitty, long gone KFC slogans. You rolled your eyes. “That’s the best you can do? ‘Looking good’?”

He laughed, leaning in close to you again. “I’m a simple man- I say it how it is.”

You try not to compare him to his brother, who speaks even less and means even more.

Joel hadn’t returned to sit by the fire, or ominously brood right next to you like you thought he might. You don’t see him at all that night, not after what he said to you in the back kitchen or rather what you didn’t say to him. Only when you tried to sleep, doing so fitfully and waking up still tired and worn in the early morning, did you see him. He sat by Ryan on the only remaining dining table left, hunched over with his palms clasped between his knees. But he watched, dark eyes trained on you like a hunter to prey. You didn’t shake his focus even after you had sluggishly escaped your sleeping bag. 

Now, still being forced to buddy up with him as you travel, you don’t say a word. You tug the hood of your flimsy hoodie up, and zip your new jacket up all the way, shoving your hands deep in the pockets. 

You turn your head slightly, looking at him from the corner of your eye. His gaze stays trained ahead, but you can feel his attention on you once more. 

“How much longer?”

His voice is hushed, and nearly ripped away from you by the wind, but you still catch his words. You turn to him, faking confusion with furrowed brows. He steps closer, filling the space between the both of you, casting a glance behind him to the group. They’re too preoccupied by their own chattering teeth to pay attention to the two of you. 

He looks down at you, his face stony. “How much longer are you gonna keep this up?”

You look up at him with your most innocent doe eyes. Keep what up?

His jaw clenches, and his nostrils flare as he hisses. “How much longer are you gonna keep being a brat?”

You pout out your bottom lip just to sell it, and he scoffs, shaking his head as looks out to the street in front of you. 

“You wanna act like a brat ,” He growls, gaze dark. “Then I’ll treat you like one.”

That godforsaken feeling in your stomach, that you had fought and wrangled and just about killed with your own bare hands, teeth, and sheer willpower, comes to life at his words. You swallow at the pulse that jumps from your neck to right between your legs. 

You roll your eyes at him. 

Do your worst is what you say with a cocky tilt of your head. 

Please do your worst is what that feeling between your legs begs.

He steps closer, and you instinctively step back slightly, keeping distance. He doesn’t let you go far, stepping with you until he’s looking down his nose at you, sneering. 

“No more of this bullshit. You’re in this group. You’re in my group.”  

His tones bites, and his words sting. You weren’t dead because of him. You had food because of him. You were part of this group because of him.

You were still here, even when you could have left. Even when you could have thanked Ryan for pulling out your stitches, and waltzed off on your own. You could have pretended you didn’t owe a debt, or some level of twisted subordination and gratitude to Joel before. Now? You were stuck with this insufferably moody man, and he was your boss. Leader. Protector. Dickhead who had kissed you unforgettably and then wanted you to forget it. All of the above. 

And you were pissing him off. 

“You’re with me from now on.” He says, voice harsher than before, and your attention snaps back to him. You thought he was going to kick you out, or pull rank and tell you to respect him. Not whatever he said.

He sees your wide-blown look and scoffs, nodding his head. 

“Not just travel. Morning, day and night, you’re gonna stick with me until you can realise I’m doing you a fucking favour .” He bites. “‘M not gonna have you turning my fucking crew against me ’cause of your pissy attitude.”

You are fuming with anger. Just because you talked to Tommy and not him, just because you tried having one friend in this miserable, testosterone cluster fuck raiding group, Joel would say you’re trying to turn them against him? 

You bite your tongue. Literally. You have to clamp your teeth down, and you bite harder when he continues. 

“C’mon.” He barks, jerking his head towards the road.

You follow like a soldier, staying by his side, and keeping your head held high. You just chant to yourself silently. Boss. Leader. Protector. Dickhead. Dickhead. Dickhead.

He stays true to his word. 

He doesn’t let you slow down pace, even when your feet bleed and parts of your shoe literally give out. Instead, he just looks at you, and in response to your silence, tells you to hurry up. Behind you, the group trudges along. Tommy veers closer to you, but with one foreboding glare from Joel, he rolls his eyes and backs off. Even his own brother wasn’t willing to piss him off more when he was this moody.

The city still sprawls ahead, and as the sun begins to set you assume you’ll continue travelling through the night, and you groan to yourself silently. Joel, persistent to prove you wrong, turns into a rundown pub on a corner as night falls. 

You follow behind him wearily, and tempted to let the group trail him in first. He senses your hesitation somehow, and glares at you over his shoulder. 

“Get going, Dollface.”

Your thumb flicks over your knife and you’re tempted to stab him, and show him just how bratty you can be. You resist however, and settle for holding it in your palm as you enter the pub. Wooden bar stools, tables and chairs collapsed in a pile in the furthest corner, as if the group had been here before and tidied up. The bar itself is empty, and the back wall mirror shattered. It is, thankfully, empty and you scan around the room, settling your pack and sleeping bag down against a wall. Satisfied, you slip your knife back into your jeans.

Joel doesn’t hide the fact that he watches you. When you turn to him, he doesn’t look away, and instead raises an eyebrow. 

Tommy smiles at you across the room, and your eyes flick to him, lips involuntarily tugging up.

Your gaze flicks back to Joel, but his face remains stony. He jerks his head to a staircase, like you’re an obedient dog waiting on his command. 

You tuck your tail between your legs and follow him. 

The group’s eyes trail after you as you pass through them. Only Tommy steps into your path, and his hand grabs your elbow, stopping you. 

“You all good, Dollface?”

His eyebrows are drawn tight together, and the beard he’s been growing in the winter makes him look older, more serious. He leans in closer, aware of the ears and eyes pinned to you as his voice lowers. 

“He’s my brother, I know but…you say the word, and I’m beside you.”

You nod your head, swallowing and looking away from his eyes. “Thanks.”

Tommy opens his mouth to say something, but he closes it again and his hand retreats from your arm. You offer him a thin lipped smile, and then you step around him, to Joel who looks like he wants to murder you. 

Joel doesn’t say anything, and instead turns, striding up the rickety and splintered staircase. 

You glare daggers into his stupidly broad back, into the shoulder you want to scratch up, into the scalp you want to tug at. Dickhead, dickhead, dickhead, dickhead, dickhead. 

You barely reach the landing by the time he’s pushing open a door. He stills scans the room, ever hypervigilant of some unknown threat. 

Your eyes widen at the room. Specifically at the bedroom, where a faded, mildew smelling bed sits in the middle, surrounded by splintered, but intact drawers and a wardrobe. What the fuck?

You turn to him, nearly opening your mouth to say exactly so, but then in a split second his forearm is lodged against your throat and your back is slammed to the wall. 

You garble out some sound in shock, and he reers his head in, sneering with his canines showing. 

“What the fuck are you doing with Tommy?”

You sputter a bit more, and kick out at him, spearing your knee into his groin. He shifts his hips, and you land a blow against his sturdy thigh instead. He applies more pressure to your throat, not enough that you even get dizzy, but with enough power that you can’t break out of his hold. 

“Speak.” He growls, eyes dark. “Enough with the silent treatment bullshit, answer my question.”

Your hand grips your knife and you yank it out of your jeans, angling it into the soft part of his stomach. He feels the edge of the blade, and he seethes. 

“I fucking dare you. See what happens.”

Your other hand reaches up, and he shifts, bracing for the impact of your fist to his face. Instead you tap against his forearm, scowling at him the best you can while he nearly crushes your windpipe. 

His eyes flick back to yours and you can see he wants to keep you pinned, angry and fuming with you. A gentle reminder by the sharp tip of your knife has him growling, but he eases the pressure against you. 

“Speak. Now.”

You glare at him, but as much as you would like to gut him like a fish, you know that wouldn’t stop him from cracking your head open against the brick. You had been treading water since day one- while Tommy was your friend, Joel was everything but that. You weren’t going to push him to show you, again, just why everyone bowed their heads to him. 

“Nothing’s fucking happening with Tommy.” You spit, the first words you’ve spoken to him in weeks. 

“Yeah?” He leans in closer, mere inches away from you. “Tell me why there’s talk he wants out. Only since you’ve been here, buddying up to him.”

You don’t hide your confusion. In some part, you thought Joel was implying a relationship between you and his brother. But now, you’re completely lost. 

“I don’t know what you’re on about, Miller.”

He sneers. “You hate me. Not hard to assume you’d try and make my brother do the same.”

You try your best to look down your nose at him, even with his forearm still pinned to your throat. “I’m pissed off with you Miller. I’m not trying to turn your brother against you.”

He stares into your eyes for a moment, the dark brown hard and unyielding beneath his brow.  

“That’s it? You’re just being a fucking brat?”

You swallow, the movement painful against his forearm. You dig the tip of your blade into his gut, reminding him of its presence. He doesn't flinch, and simply stares at you, waiting for your response.

"There's no conspiring or fucking crazy conspiracy, Miller. I just didn't want to talk to you."

He clenches his jaw, his tongue running along his teeth. His eyes dart down to your cheek, and follow your scar to your lips, where his gaze lingers.

You expect it to soften him, to wipe away the brutal anger radiating off him. Instead, the pressure is back against your windpipe and he growls.

“I told you to let it go. Get over yourself. We kissed.”

"Exactly."

He rolls his eyes. "You've been ignoring me for weeks because we kissed? Jesus, Dollface you're in for a real fucking shock- that meant nothing."

You swallow, glaring at him. Willing yourself to not let tears well up. He continues.

"This isn't some fairytale- I'm not sure what kinda bedtime stories you got told growing up, but there's no happy ending out here. That died the day of the goddamn outbreak." His gaze is thunderous.  

"Fuck. You." Like you hadn’t lived through the fucking outbreak too- like you were some stupid schoolgirl, with a sickening crush on him.

"Brat. ” He spits.

Dickhead. Dickhead. Dickhead.

"Just cause you think you can walk around, doing what you want, doesn't mean you can, Miller." You seethe, anger flooding out of you. "You might not give a damn, but I do."

"Why?! It was a kiss!" He barks. "So what? It’s not like you’ve never-

Like a rabbit trying to hide its wounded paw from a lion, you flinch back. A mistake that shows your hand more than hides it. His eyes widen slightly, and for a moment, all his anger and ire disappears, and it’s only your shared breathing to be heard, heavy and heaving.

“Oh.” He says.

Oh. Oh is his simple response to realising he was your first kiss. Oh is his one-worded response to realising that he had told you it was a mistake, that it shouldn’t have happened. Oh is what keeps ricocheting off the walls of your skull, over and over, as you watch in real time just how quickly he realises how much of a mistake it really was.

“Oh.” You whisper back to him.  

He stares at you, his mouth open slightly. You press your lips together, draw your eyebrows in, making sure you do not shed one goddamned tear in front of this man. 

His eyes dip down to your lips. “That was- I was your…” He trails off. 

You can’t even nod your head, afraid the movement will break the careful strain you have on yourself. You just stare back at him. 

His forearm is still at your throat. Your knife is still at his stomach. And yet, he leans in closer, breath fanning over yours, his gaze still pinned to your lips. 

“No.”

That word breaks his focus, and his gaze snaps to yours. 

“No, Miller. I’m not doing this with you. I’m not gonna be your little chew toy, waiting around until you decide to play with me again.” You shake your head, but there’s no anger or even sadness. You just find yourself hollow. “Fine. I’m over it, I’ll stop being shitty to you, whatever- but we’re not doing this. Ever.”

You draw back your knife, and in his quiet shock, you shove his arm off you, basically throwing yourself through the door. You pause on the flight of stairs, clinging to the damaged railing. He doesn’t follow you down, and you allow yourself this moment to suck in a heaving breath. 

One breath. That is all you will commit to being upset over Miller. 

You swallow, raising your head. No tears fall, and you won’t let them. Boss. Leader. Protector. Dickhead. He didn’t want to be your lover, he wanted to pick you up when he wanted and shove you to the side when he was bored. That was fine by you- like he said it was just a kiss, nothing more. You’d see where this raiding group led you, and that was it; you were not going to allow yourself to get your heart involved with him, you were not going to allow yourself to get hurt from a man who clearly didn’t want the same as you.

You don’t kick the staircase wall, as much as you want to. You set your shoulders back, and you step down each step, willing assurance into your feet.

You take your expected position, sitting beside your pack and sleeping bag. You join in a poker game, where you bet on dusty bottle caps and placemats. You observe the group, trying to memorise the faces and laughs and scowls as much as you can, rather than focus the thoughts flurrying around your mind. Tommy picks up on your mood, but he doesn’t say anything; instead, jabbing you in the ribs at certain jokes and trying to peer over your shoulder to see your deck.

You expect Joel to not come back downstairs, to instead sulk in that room all night.

Everyone else does too, because they nearly snap their necks in shock when the stairs creak. You force your gaze to stay pinned to the faded cards in your hand, to not look at him, to give him that satisfaction. 

The tension is thick in the air, and some of the men try to start conversation back up again. Their words are hushed though, letting them still give some attention to the drama unfolding in front of them. 

“Dollface.” 

You grind your teeth as you clench your draw, dragging your gaze over everyone and back towards the stairwell. 

He tilts his head to the stairs behind him, his hair messy and ruffled like he’d spent the past few hours running his hands through it. The offer isn’t as demanding as before, and something in his eyes is softer; even if his shoulders are still set back, even if he doesn’t beg in front of the group.

You pass your hand of cards to Tommy, who whistles loudly, displaying them to the group who erupts in a clamour of disbelief at how you were dealt them. You use the moment of eruption to walk up to Joel. He doesn’t lead you up the staircase, so you brush past him and walk up them.

When you get to the landing you realise you should’ve let him lead you, because now you’re unsure what door to go into. You don’t worry long however, when he catches up to you and pushes open the bedroom door once more.

You hesitate by the landing, and he looks over his shoulder at you. 

“Attacking me again, so soon?” You glare at him. 

He doesn’t quite roll his eyes, but rather seems to be looking above for something to give him strength. 

“Don’t push it.”

You shake your head, crossing your arms over your chest, and his eyes track the movement. “Miller, I’m doing my best to…” You lick your lips, trying to figure out how to say the words. “Respect you. As whatever boss you are to me now. But right now, I don’t want to be near you.”

“As your boss ,” He says, clearly trying to hold back anger. “Get in. Now.”

Dickhead. Dickhead. Dickhead .

Your knife was still in your jeans. This time, you were ready for any lunge or grab from him. 

You nod, stepping into the room and he closes the door behind you. You put distance between the two of you, and he notices as you walk across the room, leaning against a broken radiator and boarded up window. Now, with no light streaming in at all, the room is dark, lit only by a candle atop a dress, and he is a shadowy figure across from you. He leans against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest. You think he must look a lot more intimidating, and stupidly attractive, when he does that compared to when you did. 

“So what, Miller?” You break the silence, glaring at him. “We count down from three and see who can kill the other first?”

He scoffs, shaking his head. “No.”

“So…”

“I meant what I said earlier.”

“What part? That I’m a fucking brat?”

“Yeah, that part too Dollface.” His eyes darken, and the muscle in his forearm flexes. Your hands itch to throw your blade and see how far it will sink between his eyes. He sighs. “I said you were with me from now on. Mornin’, day an’ night.”

Your gaze breaks from his and you look around the room, suddenly caged. “You can’t be fucking serious.”

“You can sleep on the bed or the floor or hell, the goddamn closet. I don’t give a shit.”

“Downstairs.” You bite out. 

“No.” He shakes his head, glaring at you. “I trust you enough that I’m not throwing your ass to the curb.”

“But not enough to stay by Tommy?”

He nods. “Right on the money, sweetheart.”

You want to rip his teeth out when he calls you that, and a glimmer in his eyes tells you that he knows. 

“After everything,” You jerk your head to the side of the door, where only hours ago he had you pinned. “You wanna play BFFs?”

He rolls his eyes. “No. Partners.” He stares at you, holding you still with his gaze, his Southern accent rolling out between you. “We’re out tomorrow. You need to learn how to work in this group- I need to keep an eye on you. It’ll work for us both.”

“Highly doubt it.” You snap.

“Yeah, well if you drop the attitude you won’t have to worry about a hair on your pretty head.” He spits. 

You both stare at each other, clenching your jaws, fuming. 

“You know what you’re signing yourself up for?” You hiss. “You might think you’re punishing me- but it’s you who’s stuck with me .”

“Quit being a goddamn brat and I wouldn’t have to punish you.” He steps forward, sneering.

“Eat shit, Miller.”

His eyes dart down to your neck, and he looks like he’s contemplating strangling you or trying to throttle you. Instead, he takes three heavy breaths, and jerks his head to the bed. 

“It’s late. You wanna argue, leave it for the mornin’.”

And with that he sits on the edge of the bed, and begins unlacing his heavy boots. He kicks them off, and in a fluid motion, reaches down and tugs his shirt off. You freeze, and wonder if you actually died, and this was a state of hellish purgatory, meant to punish you on loop, for eternity. Your eyes are glued to him. His broad fucking shoulders- what kind of workout could he even do to look like that, and run on a halfarsed can of soup every few days? He’s not well defined, but his muscles flex with each movement, drawing your eyes to his biceps. His stomach is softer, a trail of hair leading down to his jeans. His jeans. His jeans, which his hands are atop right now, unzipping. 

“Take a picture. It’ll last longer, Dollface.”

“Fuck off.” You roll your eyes, snapping your gaze away to stare at a part of the cracked wall and feeling the heat radiating off your cheeks. “It’s the middle of winter, Miller. Are you some kind of pervert?”

You don’t look back to him, but you can hear his exhale as he moves, and the shuffle of fabric. “I run hot.”

If anything, you shiver. When a few more seconds of silence have passed, you feel safer in looking over and not being attacked by the sight of his bare neck. 

He’s under the thick covers of the bed, and you bite back a coo. He looks younger, softer- not a man who would hate you, swear at you, and keep you beside him because he thinks you’ll corrupt all that he loves. 

He huffs. “Like I said. Bed, floor, closet, I don’t care.”

Your sleeping back was downstair, but when was the last time you actually slept on a mattress? 

You don’t move. 

“What if I stab you in your sleep?”

“What I stab you in yours?” He rolls his eyes. 

You chew his words for a moment before you sigh. “No stabbing, from either of us. Deal?”

Joel scoffs, clearly thinking an agreement would be pointless and looks towards the ceiling but when you glare at him, he sighs. 

“Deal.”

You nod, and step closer to the bed. You shuck off your winter jacket, still keep your hoodie tight around you. You keep your knife tucked into your pants, but you’re content to not sleep with it in your hands. You kick off your boots, a lot less gracefully than he had, and you hear him cover a chuckle with a cough. You can’t look at him as you step closer, lifting up the blanket and getting into bed. You tug the blanket up to your chin, instantly warmer and sink in the mattress. It smells like mothballs and dust, but no springs jut out at you and it doesn’t collapse; at this point, it was like sleeping on a cloud.

Neither of you say anything or even move for at least three minutes. You flinch when he finally does, but he simply raises himself on his elbow to lean over, blowing the candle out and washing the room completely in darkness.

“Go near me and you’ll wish I stabbed you, Miller.”

He huffs, and you can imagine him rolling his eyes in the dark. “No worries, Dollface.”

Silence wraps around the two of you once more.

“I sleep talk.” You whisper to him.

“I know.”

Your head snaps in his direction, your eyes trying to see the shape of his face in the dark. “What do you mean, ‘you know’?”

The sheets shuffle, and you can imagine him shrugging. “Not like everyone has their own room.”

Once more, quiet falls, and once more you break it. “What about you?”

“What about me?” His voice is lower, more groggy already. 

“Do you sleep talk? Or are you just one of those serial snorers? Or-”

“This isn’t a sleepover.” He snaps. “We’re not playing 21 questions. Go to sleep.”

You stick your tongue out at him in the dark.

You’re not as restless as you thought you might be. Instead, once you’ve successfully blocked out the fact that you’ve nearly stabbed Joel, told him you wanted nothing from him, and are now sleeping in the same bed as him, it’s easier to fall asleep. 

Considering the fact that you hadn’t been in a real bed in months, and with the chilled winter air seeping throughout the shambling pub, the thick blanket and soft pillow were simply lulling you into a deep sleep. 

[eitaababe]

CHAPTER ONE.

╰┈➤ THE BLUE !

series masterlist. | previous / next ➛

a/n — i finally posted hallelujah

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Transferring to a new university went smoother than you expected.

You'd just settled into your new place, waiting for your new roommate to arrive. Majority of the cardboard boxes have already been unpacked, the empty ones folded neatly and stacked in the corner.

You turned your head, meeting a bright smile of a curly haired girl. You couldn't help but smile just as bright back— captivated by the girls dimples and shining eyes.

"You must be y/n! I'm Tsireya, it's so nice to finally meet you!"

"It's nice to meet you– oh," you paused, chuckling to yourself when she pulled you into an embrace, hesitantly hugging her back. After pulling away, you smiled shyly, "Thank you so much for taking my roommate request on such short notice, I didn't think I'd get an apartment room this close to campus this late in the year."

"Oh no worries, my old roomie transferred out a few months ago and rent is a bitch to pay. Plus it's nice to finally have another face around here after so long," she admitted, eyes traveling to the rest of your unpacked boxes. "You need any help with those?"

You nodded, politely accepting her offer, and as you both put away the boxes, you released a breath you didn't know you were holding.

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A group of basketball boys walked out the gym and into a hallway, all panting and wiping sweat from their forehead.

"Coach Tonowari really takes hell week serious," Lo'ak panted, leaning against the wall in exhaustion. "If I have to run another five laps around the court I might puke."

"Have fun cleaning that up on your own." Ao'nung called back, joining Lo'ak on the wall. "But yeah, my dad's no joke when it comes to conditioning."

"That smile's deceiving." Rotxo groaned, pulling a hoodie over his head.

The conversation came to a halt when a group of cheerleaders passed the boys, giggles erupting from the girls as they checked them out.

"Hey," Ao'nung poked Lo'ak's side, smirking sideways at him. "I think blondie over there has her eye on you."

"Nah man," Lo'ak laughed it off, not sparing a glance towards the passerby's. "I think I'll pass."

"For someone who says they're over their ex, you really aren't acting like it," Rotxo quietly piped up, earning a stink eye from Lo'ak. "I'm just saying!"

"Have you guys ever thought that maybe I just like being single? Me and Tsireya ended things on good terms, you guys know that."

"Doesn't mean you're over her."

"I am!"

"Prove it," Ao'nung challenged. His attention wandered over to you, walking out of your class. "Go talk to her."

Before Lo'ak could respond, both boys shoved him into your direction.

─── ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ───

If you had to choose a con from transferring, this would be it.

An 8am class was definitely not what you had in mind when you chose sports medicine as a major.

So when you finally trudged out of what seemed like the longest class ever, and still half awake, the last thing you were expecting was to get pummeled against the wall, and a large weight still on top of you the cause of it.

"Look where you're going!" You snapped, shoving the unidentified man off of you. "Eywa, is it so hard to–"

"I'm so sorry!" A voice cut you off, and you'd be lying if you didn't feel like you didn't get the wind knocked out of you once again, meeting the eyes of the mysterious boy. "Me and my friends were messing around, and I kinda lost my balance and ran into you."

Keeping a hard face, you nodded, hoping he couldn't see the pink rising in your cheeks. As you drank his features in, you came to notice he was attractive— more attractive than you'd like to admit. Whatever he was rambling on about fell deaf on your ears as you observed the rest of him, just hearing the end of his rant.

"Anyways, I'm Lo'ak." He introduced himself, bringing you back to reality. He had expectant eyes, and you realized he was awaiting a response from you.

"Oh, I'm y/n." You introduced yourself, not saying much more.

"Well, y/n," he emphasized your name, probably to prove that he would remember it, "sorry again. Maybe I could pay for a cup of coffee? To make up for practically tackling you against the wall."

You gaped, shocked at the audacity of this Lo'ak boy. He just knocked the living daylights out of you and was asking you out on a date?

"Are you serious?"

"Not like that! I promise!" He waved you off, trying not to come off too strong. "I just- noticed your eyebags.." He trailed off, avoiding your glare. "Anyways, thought you could use the caffeine."

While he wasn't the most polite, you weren't one to decline a free offer for coffee. "Fine."

"Great! I'll pick you up tomorrow?"

"Wait what?"

"How else do you expect for me to bring it to you?"

Rolling your eyes in annoyance, you held out your hand, gesturing for his phone. "Here, I'll give you my address."

"How about your number?" Lo'ak grinned, handing his phone over to you.

Scoffing, you had no choice but to agree. "Alright, but you better pick me up at 7:15. No later."

"Yes ma'am," he grinned, eyes glancing down to his phone, sending a text from his number. He started off, catching up to his group of friends, but not before hollering towards your way, catching the eye of a few on goers. "I'll see you tomorrow, y/n!"

You stood still, appalled at the boys antics.

"Boys."

"Take that, you fuckers!"

Lo'ak shouted as he caught up to the rest of the group, Ao'nung still looking unimpressed. "Congratulations, you talked to a woman. Turns out you're not completely hopeless."

"Shut up, dude," Lo'ak groaned. "And for the record, I got her number. I'm taking her out tomorrow morning for coffee."

"You're lying," Rotxo intervened, laughing lightly. "There's no way a girl that pretty would agree to go on a date with you that fast."

"Hey! I have game!"

"No you don't," Ao'nung disagreed, shaking his head with a chuckle. "Twenty bucks this is the only date you'll go on with her."

"You're on."

─── ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ───

You wake up to the sound of your phone ringing.

Without any thought, you swipe and answer it, only to be met with a certain someone's voice.

"Good morning, sleeping beauty!"

You groaned, burying your face back into your pillow. "Go away."

"Would love to, but I owe you a coffee and you wouldn't respond to my texts about your apartment building."

"That was your number?"

An offended scoff was heard from across the phone, "You were ignoring me?"

"I didn't recognize the number."

"I texted saying it was me!"

"Oh," you paused, laughing at your own antics. "Okay, maybe I was sort of ignoring you."

"Careful, I'm gonna take away my offer."

"It's an apology, you can't take away an apology!" You huffed, not realizing how much you were looking forward to the free coffee.

"Whatever, still waiting on an answer."

"My apartments on the east side of campus, the blue one. Just pull into the parking lot and text me when you're here and I'll meet you outside."

"Gotcha."

Once Lo'ak hung up, he signed into his hands. He knew which building you were talking about, he'd spent countless nights over at the very same one. He grabbed a helmet, mounting his bike and driving off.

Checking your phone and seeing a text from what you assumed to be Lo'ak's number (you still refused to save it), you threw on a sweater and quickly made your way to the parking lot, stopping in your tracks when you took in the sight in front of you.

"You have a fucking motorcycle?"

"No, I own a cargo van," Lo'ak deadpanned, chuckling at your unamused expression. "Yes sweetheart, I own a motorcycle."

"I thought you said you had a car!"

"No, you said I had a car."

"I can't get on that!" You whined, running a hand through your hair in a stressed manner. "It's not even safe! I'm wearing my backpack, what if papers fly out and I lose my books? Plus, I don't even have a helmet."

"Well then, isn't it lucky I brought one for you?" He teased condescendingly, and you wanted to punch the smug grin that you knew was underneath the helmet right off his face. "And I ride this bike to school everyday, with a backpack. You won't lose anything. Promise." He held out the helmet towards you, waiting for you to grab it from him.

With furrowed brows, and a look that Lo'ak swore made you resemble a toddler in a way they were having a tantrum, you took the helmet, putting it on and hesitantly making your way towards the bike. "What if I fall?"

"Just hold onto me." He stated, as if it were so easy.

"The things I do for free stuff." You mumbled underneath your breath, seating yourself behind the boy and wrapping your arms around his waist, trying to ignore the close proximity between you two.

"You ready?"

Before you could even answer Lo'ak took off, making your grip tighten. "I'm never getting coffee with you again!" You shouted, although the both of you knowing you didn't really mean that.

"Sure, sweetheart."

The place Lo'ak took you to was nice, a cafe that was walking distance from your morning class (which you thanked eywa for, since you didn't have to go in another death ride again).

When you walk in with him, you don't fail to notice the confused looks of two baristas in particular, staring at you behind the counter. You can't help but feel slightly self conscious at their eyes, until Lo'ak rests a hand lightly on your arm. "Don't worry, that's just my brother and sister."

"Oh," you stared at his siblings, slightly tilting your head in confusion. "..Not to be-" you paused, trying to find the right words to say. "I just- uhm, they don't look like..you know?"

Lo'ak broke into laughter once he realized the point you were trying to get across, and couldn't ignore the pulsing of his heart at the adorable look of confusion on your face. "They're adopted."

"Oh!" You breathed out in relief, chuckling awkwardly. "Gotcha." and to avoid anymore awkward situations you made your way to the cashier, Lo'ak following in suit.

"Hey Kir," He smiled, looking over at the other boy. "Spider," Without expecting him to, he pulled you beside him, making you smack his hand off of you. "This is Y/n."

"Hi." You smiled politely, earning a couple smiles back.

As Lo'ak ordered and paid for the both of you, you looked down towards the floor, trying to ignore the gazes that were seemingly locked onto you the whole entire time.

"You good?"

His voice snapped your head upwards, meeting his warm eyes of honey. You opened your mouth, only to find your throat dry, and opted for a silent nod instead. You noticed the drinks in each of his hands and took the one closest to you, thanking him quietly before quickly walking out of the cafe, grabbing your bag from the bike and walking out, leaving a very confused Lo'ak, and his siblings even more so.

But you really could've cared less, as you tried to calm the constant pounding in your chest.

taglist / open. @s-surreality @il0veheartz @blueforte @etherialblackrose @syulangg @anonymousailurophile @ipoopedmypants47 @neqeyam @alwayswndr @doulcha @n7ytiri @8resa (tags that don't work in comments)

[awingedinsect]

-Flood me like Atlantic-

Chapter 8

Word count: 1.8k

Warnings: cursing, talks of injury, talks of homelessness, there’s a general 18+ content warning for this entire series and it does get a tiny bit interesting at the end here. Yearning Vessel gets his own warning.

“I got you a present.”

“Oh yeah? What is it?”

The little girl smiled, raking up a fistful of sand.

“It’s a surprise, silly.” She said. The breeze was blowing her hair, and Vessel smiled as she pulled it out of her sweet little eyes. “For your birthday.”

He remembers the smell of the ocean, the sound of the grey waves crashing on the shore. He remembers sitting there for hours with her, watching the tide come in as the sun made its journey behind the clouds.

He chuckled. “Aw heck, you didn’t have to do that.” There was a big smile creeping up on his face. “…Do I get a hint?”

“Well, mom paid for it, but I picked it out.” She said, yanking up a few pieces of grass poking through the grout. “and no.” She made a zipper across her mouth, beaming up at him with specks of sand scattered on her pink cheeks. “My lips are sealed!”

“Hey, Vessel.”

Vessel looks up from the pan he’s scrubbing, turning on the faucet to rid it of the suds. The water soaks into the cuffs of his hoodie.

“Hm?”

IV stands beside him casually, shrugging the leather jacket he performed in over his good shoulder.

“I’m heading into town. Anything I can get for you?”

Vessel sets the pan down on the drying rack, hands spidering a little desperately over the pile of dirty dishes in search of his next target. “Oh, no thanks,” he says, blinking at the guitarist’s reflection in the window then immediately looking down when his is in the pane too. He still looks tired, eyes bloodshot and hollow. Almost like he’d been nearly sacrificed and since possessed by an anonymous deity.

“You uh, driving?” He asks, glancing over at the man’s broken arm. An unprecedented wave of guilt comes over him, and he swipes his nose on his shoulder with a sniff. The sunlight is pouring in through the dusty window and it makes eye contact feel doubly impossible. But IV just shrugs, stuffing his hand in his jean pocket and shuffling a ring of keys.

“Aye, I’m the only one up here with a license. But I don’t mind, going to the grocery is pretty much a special interest at this point. You sure I can’t get you anything? Swing by your house for some clothes?”

It amuses Vessel that there’s an unspoken understanding that he’s staying. It would be sweet, if there wasn’t also the underlying idea that he doesn’t actually have a choice. But then again, he doesn’t have anywhere else that he should be, much less a house. He wonders if they can tell. If the inability to pay another night's rent at that damn motel is as plain as the bandage on his face. God, he wants his keyboard.

Out of anything in the world, he’d take those keys under his fingers.

“I’m fine, honestly. I can take a cab to the motel lat-“

“You’re staying in a motel?”

A horrendous blush creeps up his neck, and he dumps a plate on the rack hard enough to make him wince. “I’m… temporarily a bit displaced?”

There’s not a whole lot to read on IV’s face. He just absorbs information, then says some contemplated thing in return. But out of pity or surprise, there’s something closer to concern in his eyes.

“…You got a job, mate?”

There’s a silence longer than III’s fucking legs, and maybe twice as insufferable as the man himself. Even now Vessel can hear him in the next room, quietly muttering over his collection of herbs and spell-making equipment in an attempt to guard against whatever “bullshit the cat dragged in.” II is watching the tv, sipping a soda and giggling at whatever's on the discovery channel.

Vessel’s big eyes finally gather the strength to look up in the window, mouth twitching as he meets IV’s own.

“…I sing.”

And that’s what he does.

That’s how that day passes, and the next, and the next… at first, he’s nervous. Just settles on the edge of the couch to watch the three of them take positions, falling into the flow of practice as easy as a stream into the sea. II looks about as at home behind his drum set as a tree in the woods. Vessel has never seen so much cohesion between a person and their instrument, and it fills his gut with an almost jealousy, seeing something so flawless performed with such ease.

IV forgoes his guitar, obviously. But he still brings a lot to the performance by presence and a few vocals alone. II wasn’t kidding when he said the man could scream. The sound scratches Vessel's ears so gorgeously, he could legitimately start crying.

And then there’s III.

He stands front and center, that same flowery jacket on his shoulders. He looks concentrated. In tune. And yet there’s an ease that rolls off of him so fabulously it can’t help but feel like a subtle challenge.

Vessel watches his fingers move over the strings, rings glinting in the grey-ish light of the foggy forest.

And he feels… something.

He watches them play for an hour before II begs him to join. There’s something in those blue eyes that is undeniable, no matter how out of place he feels. And soon there is a mic stand in front of him, adjusted about three levels higher than he found it.

“Bring Me to Life.” III mutters. And without a piano, the first sounds are nothing but a few chords plucked by his nimble fingers.

The challenge is no longer subtle.

Vessel rocks on his heels, fingers splaying delicately down the side of the mic stand before gripping it low and still for his mouth to caress.

“How can you see into my eyes…”

A very quiet “oh hooo” of impending excitement comes from somewhere behind the drum set, and Vessel smiles.

“…like open doors?”

IV’s screams of “I can’t wake up” ring in all of their ears for several days, so intense it’d be funny if not so impressive. They played for hours that day, only pausing to brew a few cups of III’s jasmine rose tea. II was right; it tasted like ass. And yet in that room, sweaty from pouring his soul into a mic and surrounded by those three, passionate freaks of the industry, he realized he was almost happy. His smile, for the first time in years, wasn’t something he willed onto his face. And if he could hang on forever to the feeling of discovering a smile instead of creating it he would.

II tells him goodnight without any prompting. Just smiles at him, and says it as easy as breathing, before heading off into one of three doors lining the hallway.

IV likes him too. He gets a few changes of clothes and a brand new toothbrush from him, and even shares an intelligent conversation about guitars once Vessel mentions that he likes to play, too. Most of his feeling is in his eyes, he’s realized. They have a way of sparkling and harboring what might be big smiles in another case when he’s intrigued or at peace. The only person who gets him to really smile, is II; When the drummer is curled up in a tiny ball on the couch with his cup of “tea” or going absolutely manic on the drums, closing his eyes and getting carried off in the rhythm.

Even III smiles then.

But not once has he ever smiled at Vessel.

Vessel goes to sleep one night, thinking about it.

What would it feel like to have III’s approval? It’s clear at this point that he’ll never make the guy happy. He resents him too much for that. And yet, he did save his life. Shouldn’t that be good enough?

Vessel doesn’t like him very much, he’s decided. Especially when after belting his heart out at the man’s command he doesn’t even get a “well done”, or a “thank you” when Vessel made a mug of that nasty fucking tea and brought it to him after practice. He just nods his head and half-way looks at him; because at the end of the day, Vessel isn’t worth his attention.

And it makes his face red as a beet.

The moon is pouring in through the window. It’s been a week since it was full, and lighting up the forest outside with him in it. The cuts on his belly seem to be healing well, and he’s planning to take the bandage off his head tomorrow and see what the hell that’s all about.

Why won’t III approve of him?

He turns over on his back, looking up at the ceiling.

“You really are amazing.” II’s voice echoes in his head from earlier in the day, when he was cutting up some apples in the kitchen. “We’re all lucky bastards to have a singer like you messing around with us. Talk to III, we’ve got a gig coming up next week and I don’t know if we’d be half as good without ya!”

His eyes flutter as the darkness becomes staticy, rimmed on the left by faint moonlight and quiet as a grave with the whole house asleep. He thinks about II’s words. Is he in a band? If not, what’s he been doing up here all this time?

He’s not sure he can look at another crowd. Another waiting, patient collection of faces staring at his own until he does something impressive. Until the night goes on and terrible things have a chance to happen.

He shudders hard and closes his eyes, taking a deep breath.

Can he sing for people?

For me.

A voice speaks somewhere between his mind and his eyelids.

Sing for me.

“I can scream loud enough, for you.” His mouth wraps around the words, muttering them softly with hardly a sound. His tongue darts out on his lip.

He really does love singing with bass.

His hand slips under his hoodie, spreading delicately over the bandages decorating him. His fingers are cold against his hot skin, searing between the pieces of himself and what III taped to him. It doesn’t hurt so bad anymore.

His fingers travel down, grazing softly over the faintest of trails till they touch the band of III’s sweatpants.

God, he’s annoyed. He’s a good singer. Why isn’t he good enough for everyone? Why doesn’t that prick of a bassist say thank you when he makes him tea?

“I can scream loud enough...”

His fingertips push past the elastic, the slightest of tremors in his big hands for no reason he feels like guessing. He didn’t realize until right now how aroused he is by nothing in particular. It’s simply been too long, he thinks. Too long since he created release for all the sounds in his mind.

“…for you.”

For me.

“…Yes.”

After only a few minutes his eyes shoot wide open, full of pleading and hate as he cups a hand over his mouth and bites down hard enough to muffle a scream.

[resident-gay-bitch]

mommy issues

part 18 / contents

eddie picked up the phone as it rang, as quickly as he could so it wouldn’t wake wayne, “hello?”

“yo, dude.” it was gareth, “i’m about to get the lovebirds, we want burgers. you coming?”

“yeah.” eddie nodded, “i’ll be out in five.”

“okay, see ya then.”

eddie hung up the phone and hurried down to his room, changing his shirt from his fuck off of a fathers to a more acceptable faded old ratty metallica one that the moths may or may not have gotten too. he pulled on a zip up hoodie, and threw one of wayne’s jackets on over the top, because even though it was summer, eddie knew gareth was going to blast his goddamned aircon way too high and he’d shiver without it. he tugged on his boots and checked his hair in the mirror.

it was so smooth now.

you worked wonders.

he heard the car horn out the front and pulled the collar of his hoodie up high around his neck to cover it. he rushed out the door with a bright smile.

eddie shut the door and turned around to see gareth and grant in the front seats raising their hands in the air in a stupid sort of dance, and jeff was leant forward between the front two seats doing the funky monkey. eddie laughed and rushed for the backseat.

he slid in, the hoodie still secure around his neck. he pulled the door shut at the loud blast of gareth’s metal tape consumed the small space. they all started to headbang along as gareth pulled out onto the road again.

the music was turned down after a minute.

“what did you do to it, man?” grant asked, holding up a dishevelled action figure he found on the ground, “he’s dead!”

“oh, don’t even, man.” gareth shook his head, “i was picking up steph last night and it was on the seat, and she like… looked at it for a bit and then just tossed it on the ground and i was like, whatever. i’ll pick it up after, she’s a bitch. but then, when we got back into the car after raiding the seven eleven i saw shed crushed it with her pristine fucking sneakers, and so i just took her home.”

“what the fuck, she crushed it?” jeff asked, shocked.

“obliterated it.”

“awh man,” eddie said, reaching forward to grab it and inspect the poor toy himself, “fuck, this was your new character!”

“i know!” gareth gasped, “she didn’t even apologise.”

“dump the whore.” jeff said.

“i agree.” eddie blew a raspberry and tossed the action figure into the front dash, “she’s done to many mean things to my garebear.” eddie gave gareth’s shoulders a squeeze from behind him.

“shut the fuck up, eddie.” gareth sneered, giving him a glance though the review mirror.

“sometimes i think you two have move chemistry than jeff and i, and we’re literally in love.” grant commented and it made eddie and gareth laugh.

eddie wrapped his arms around gareth’s seat and chest in an attempted a hug, “it’s because he’s been my secret lover all this time, haven’t you shnookums?”

gareth hummed and made kissy faces, turning his cheek slightly so eddie could smack one on him, “hmm, the best damn sex i’ve ever had, babylove.”

“weird bromance aside,” jeff said, grabbing eddie’s shoulder and pulling him back into his own seat, “they have a point. she’s a bitch.”

“she’s a hot bitch.” gareth pointed back at him, “and she really really likes having sex with me.”

“you’ve cheated on me now, garebear?” eddie gasped, “i’m heartbroken.”

gareth poked his tounge out at eddie through the review mirror, “look, can we not talk about stephanie? i’m trying to avoid that headache right now.”

“affirmative, cappin’.” eddie muttered, putting on some strange voice that didn’t make sense and saluting.

“yeah, alright.” grant nodded, “but you can’t avoid it forever.”

“got it.” gareth clicked his tongue and turned a corner, “what do you fuckers want?”

“you.” eddie hummed, “always you, lover.”

“you’re going to make me sick.” jeff deadpanned him.

eddie dove for him, poking his tongue out and trying to lick jeff’s face.

“you’re an animal!” jeff tried to shove him off.

“hey! hey!” gareth called out, “no fighting… or… getting frisky in the back of my car.”

eddie managed to stab his tongue into the high of jeff’s cheek and he pulled away with a laugh, and jeff wiped the very little slobber away in a dramatic feat and wined.

“i’ve been contaminated. i’ve got hetero-cooties!”

“oh, ease up, jeff.” grant said with a laugh, “we all know eddie’s not straight.”

eddie retaliated by shoving his boot forward into grants chest.

“why are we friends with him?” gareth asked and it made eddie cackle.

“i dunno man.” jeff shrugged, “we thought you were cool, but apparently he just fucking follows you everywhere.”

“like a shaddow.” grant added, flaring his hands out for dramatics.

“aww, you want me to follow you boys around too?” eddie hummed, batting his eyelids at a rapid pace, “you jealous?”

“i’d rather die.” jeff said plainly.

“can you lot shut up and tell me what you want?” gareth shouted, “we’re fucking here.”

“milkshake, fries.” eddie said, pulled himself forward to kiss gareth’s cheek again.

“ew.” gareth wiped the ‘slobber’ off and wiped it on grants leg.

“dude!” grant wailed.

“i’ll have a cheese burger.” jeff cut in, ever the calm one, “large coke and some fries.”

“i’ll have the same, but a chicken cheese instead.”

“got it.” gareth nodded and slid up to the window of the diner, which was trying a new drive through feature out which these boys absolutely adored on a saturday afternoon.

gareth made the order and held his hand out, and everyone slapped down their change to pay for their meals. once the food was collected (and more petty bickering was made), gareth drove into the carpark and cut the engine. the food was handed out, and there was peace, just for a moment.

“eddie, you want front seat?” grant asked, shoving fries into his mouth.

“yeah!” eddie grinned, slurping his shake.

grant opened the passenger door and rolled out before slamming it shut, and eddie grabbed his things and climbed through the centre console to plop down on the seat.

“dude!” gareth slapped his calves, “feet off the leather- do you know how much this car cost?”

“more than me, i know.” eddie drawled with a roll of his eyes, “got it, dad.”

gareth squinted his eyes and then reached into the takeaway bag and pulled something out, handing it to eddie.

eddie gasped excitedly and set his drink down between his feet. he was sitting with his back to the door and his knees curled up to his chest so he could face everyone in the car. he made grabby hands for what gareth was holding.

“you got me pie?” eddie asked.

gareth pulled it back with a mean grin, “well, i might have.”

“what?” eddie asked, knowing he’d have to do something to get it.

now that he’d seen free pie on the horizon, he really fucking wanted it.

g cleared his throat, “so… upgraded from mechanic to plumber, huh?”

eddie squinted his eyes at his best friend, and then even more at the other two who were looking at him with smug grins.

“yeah, bet you fixed her pipes real good.” grant said and then snickered.

eddie’s eyes widened with the realisation as to what they were talking about.

“shut up.”

“status report?” gareth asked.

eddie looked at him for a moment, trying to hold back a grin, and then he yanked the collar of his hoodie down to show his neck.

the boys went crazy. they all held up their hands and shook them out and did this stupid thing they all do when they pretend they’re overly excited popular girls in movies and squeal for good news. so that’s what the did, they all shook their hands and squealed for eddie.

he cupped his hands over his mouth and cleared his throat, fixing his voice to sound robotic and deep and said, “status updated from; virgin nerd, to; stepmother-fucking nerd!”

they all squealed again.

“dude! no way.” gareth slapped eddie’s knees.

“yes way!” eddie laughed, “dude, it was so hot- her shower was not broken, by the way. it was all a ploy to take me to bed-“

“dude…” jeff laughed, “we know.”

“that’s like… the most classic line in the book.” gareth agreed.

“what?” eddie’s arms dropped, “well, i didn’t know.”

gareth pulled a strange face and handed the pie over to eddie, “it astounds me how thick headed you can be sometimes.”

“well, so-rry for not assuming my stepmother was trying to lure me to bed.” eddie hummed, chomping into it, and it was apple today, one of his favourites, “i’m just not a dirty minded fuck like you lot.”

“well, that’s the biggest pile of shit i’ve ever heard.” grant snickered.

eddie swatted at him, and then grant swatted back, so eddie lunged forward to grab his head and shove it down, but grant grumbled and wrestled eddie’s arms back.

“can you-“ jeff tried to cut in by pulling their arms apart, but it was no feat, “jesus-“

“someones a little excited today, i think.” gareth laughed and poked eddie’s neck, “she really did some damage, ed.”

eddie, suddenly forgetting all about his attack on poor grant in the back seat, slumped back against the door wirh a dopey grin and sipped on his chocolate shake, “yeah…” he giggled, like a love sick girl.

“oh my god,” jeff said, leaning his head between the two front seats to look at eddie better, “you are a mess.”

“what did she do to you?” gareth asked in shock.

eddie giggled again, “she took my virginity.”

all the guys laughed at him, happy smiles. eddie knew they were making fun, of course they were, eddie was acting like he was twelve again, but he also knew they weren’t actually judging. they were happy for him, this was just really amusing.

“so…” grant shook his head at eddie, “you going to disclose all the juicy details, or are you going to leave us hanging?”

“well!” eddie said, sipping his shake one last time before sitting it down. he cleared his throat and clasped his hands together, “it was… phenomenal. literally the best sex anyone’s ever had, i’m sure.”

“yes, obviously.” gareth dead panned him, “because you, a lanky nerd virgin freak knows how to fuck.”

eddie kicked him, “like you’re any better- and i’m not lanky, thank you. i’m just… tall. i have muscles.”

“sure you do,” grant poked his shin, “twiggie.”

eddie sneered at him, “she happens to think i do, thank you. and i can pick her up with ease, so that’s all that matters.”

“oh, so there was picking up involved?” gareth asked, taking a bite of his burger without paying attention to it, and sauce dribbled down his front.

eddie grabbed a napkin and tossed it at him, “no, not… during. i just- i’ve picked her up before. she likes to be manhandled, i think.”

“hmm, who doesn’t?” gareth asked, wiping his front and making missy faces at eddie, “i want you to pick me up and toss me around, big boy.”

eddie grinned at him, “oh, lover, why didn’t you ask sooner?”

“gag.” jeff said without a hint of emotion, “i’m gagging right now. this is so gross.”

“does anyone have a knife so i can cut my ears off?” grant asked, “i don’t want to hear anything, ever again.”

eddie and gareth laughed.

“okay, well…” eddie cleared his throat again and ate some of his fries, “first- oh, after she spat in my mouth and told me i had to do as she said-“

“oh, fuck man…” gareth looked at him wearily, “she was in control?”

eddie nodded, “full on in control.”

“dude.” gareth pulled at his cheeks, “that’s so hot.”

“a woman in control is hot-“ grant said.

“hey!” jeff slapped his arm, “boyfriend in the car.”

grant grinned at him, “women in control is hot, but you’re hotter.”

“ew!” eddie said, “gag! i’m literally gagging!”

“cut off my ears!” gareth said, laughing with eddie now, “you’re so gross!”

they both had a hand shoved into their face.

“please, continue, i’m hooked.” jeff said, leaning over the seat to look at eddie eagerly.

“well- okay, so, she’s really into all that bdsm stuff, which is so hot. and she’s like- oh, she’s been to sex parties, man, and she had like, full on subs when she was my age-“

“that’s so weird to think about.” grant said.

“i know.” eddie pointed a fry at him, “so, like, she went full dom mode and called me her sub.”

“i really wouldn’t pin you as a sub.” jeff squinted at him, “like, i know you’re a pathetic virgin- well, not anymore. but like… a sub?”

eddie shrugged, “i mean, yeah.”

“but you’re so big and scary.” gareth added.

“why thank you, garebear.” eddie hummed with a proud smile, “but no, like… she said the same thing. she actually said because i could take control, it was hotter that i didn’t. and like- bro, i’m not getting in the way of her doing what she wants with me. i’m just- i’m happy enough to be included, you know?”

that made them all laugh and nod their heads, “yeah, okay, makes sense.” grant said, “still, it’s bizarre. but also…” he tipped his head to the side.

“yeah,” jeff shrugged, “we did see how she talked to you last night.”

“and she’s your stepmother.” gareth added, “it’s kind of a hot dynamic, if you ask me. like… it makes sense.”

“thank you.” eddie chirped.

“dude, i can’t believe you managed to bag your stepmother.”

“she’s keeping me too.” eddie said with a proud smile, “said so herself. i’m going back tonight.”

gareth struck his hands over his heart and dramatically flopped back into his seat, “you’re leaving me, pumpkin?”

“i’m sorry, it was good whilst it lasted, garebear, but i’ve moved onto hotter things.” eddie played along, as he always did.

“understandable.” gareth nodded, “she’s a peice of art-“

“hey!” eddie glared at him, “careful where you tread, whore. she’s mine.”

“and your dads.” grant snickered.

eddie turned his glare to grant, and it shut him up very fast, “i know, it’s very unfortunate, but! she hates sex with him, takes viagra for it… she likes sex with me. she was the one that asked me to come over again tonight!”

“look at you go.” jeff punched his arm encouragingly and eddie beamed, “told you to stop doubting yourself man, this towns just fucked up and prejudiced.”

eddie smiled down at his lap, “yeah, yeah.”

“okay, so, details?” gareth asked.

eddie nodded and took another sip of his shake, “well, so… yeah, she layed me down and blew me- which was entirely too fast. i’m not even gonna deny it. i just- mouth on dick equals wow.”

“yeah, we’ve all been there, man.” jeff slapped him on the back, “don’t worry.”

“jeff didn’t last three seconds once i put my mouth on him,” grant said with a cheeky grin, “barely put him inside-“

“shut your goddamned mouth.” jeff grabbed him.

“well, i would shut up,” grant shrugged, “if you could get your dick far enough down without blowing your load first.”

“that was one time!” jeff wailed and it made them all laugh.

“okay, well, she gave me a blowjob and then we were kissing, and she was like,” eddie cleared his throat and put on a really terrible you impression, “oh eddie, you have a really good mouth for a virgin, and i was like, thanks, and she was like, do you want to pout that mouth to better use? and like, who was i to say no to that!”

“you are her out?” gareth asked.

“twice.” eddie grinned, “twice in one go. she said i’m really good at it too, and i’m not allowed to eat anyone else out because she wants it all to herself.”

jeff scruffed up his hair.

“this sounds like you’re describing a dream.” grant said, deadpan.

“i know!” eddie exclaimed, “i woke up this morning thinking it was.”

“okay, so, you ate her out, twice…” gareth pointed at him and shoved some fries into his mouth at the same time, “what next-“

“well,” eddie grinned a little evilly, “i didn’t just eat her out.” he giggled, “she sat on my face.”

gareths jaw dropped and the other two in the back seat started a little cheer for him.

“you- she sat on your face?” gareth asked, shocked and quite frankly appalled, “you beat me to that? i can’t believe this! how was it? was it everything we thought it would be?”

“it was better.” eddie sighed, thinking back to it (discreetly moving his milkshake to cover his semi), “oh, to be crushed by those sweet, thick thighs again. to have her on my tongue. i wished she’d just sat there until i suffocated, so the last sounds i ever heard were her moans and my name on her lips, the last taste her sweet cunt, and the last sight to be her naked, just rocking on my face and pulling my hair. i could stay there forever, eternally fucking blissed out.”

“you should turn that into a song.” grant commented.

“i might.” eddie hummed.

“sounds like a dream.” gareth sighed, “i have been trying to get steph to sit on my face for ages, i have so far been unsuccessful.”

“sucks for you.” eddie said, poking his tongue out, “i bet i could ask at any time and she’d let me do it again. she likes when i beg.”

“awh man.” jeff sunk back in his seat, “begging is hot.”

“agreed.” gareth nodded.

“it’s like…” jeff looked at g and waved his hands about, “something about them needing it so bad they’re literally on their knees, or on the brink of crying for it.”

“yeah, no, right?” gareth nodded, pointing back at jeff, “like, they need you. it’s pathetic and really hot.”

grant stuck his hand towards eddie and they slapped hands in a sort of shake, “it’s okay man, you’re not alone out there.”

“sub solidarity.” eddie nodded and they laughed.

“okay, so, after that?” gareth asked.

“oh, well i fucking came- like, she was looking down at me and- yeah, i came.”

“oh, dude-“ jeff started.

“you’re not the only one.” gareth shrugged, “i came the first time i ate a girl out.”

“it’s hot.” eddie said simply, “pussys great. anyway, i came and that messed up her plan to fuck me because i went soft again, so she sat away and started touching herself- which… wow.”

“hard in an instant?” gareth asked over a bite of burger.

“hard in an instant.” eddie said, “and then- oh, i was on my knees, begging her and shit, and she pulled my hair really hard and told me i was hers. then she sat back on top of me, and… virgin no more.”

“hey…” jeff shook him by the shoulder, “look at you go!”

“i know.” eddie giggled and picked at his fries.

“how longed you last?” grant asked, “did you beat gareth’s whopping score of five seconds?”

“yours was seven, shut the fuck up.” gareth swatted grant.

“oh, not long at all.” eddie shook his head, “i don’t know exactly, but like… it was so wet, and warm, and tight, and-“

“dude you not use a condom?” gareth asked and eddie shook his head, “awh, man. what the fuck?”

eddie giggled, “she said she’s clean and on the pill and taking the plan b, so… i get to go raw, and danny doesn’t.”

“fuck.” gareth groaned, “she must like you a whole lot, man.”

eddie hummed, “well, anyway- she was looking me in the eye and telling me shit like… i was hers and that she owned me and stuff, and my little virgin heart couldn’t handle it all enough as it, and it doesn’t help that i’m literally in love with her so that was all-“

“you’re in love with her?” they all gasped.

eddie shrugged and shook his head, “yeah, have been for a while, but i’ve been avoiding the thought. but i don’t care any more, i love her so much, dude. i’m gonna make her love me back one day, i don’t care how long it takes.”

gareth slowly nodded his head and widened his eyes, “alright… eddie’s in love with his step mom.”

“noted.” grant nodded.

“doomed narrative.” jeff added, muffled around a bite.

“probably, but i don’t care.” eddie glanced at him, “i’m also okay with her breaking my heart so- anyway, back to the sex.”

“back to the sex.” grant nodded.

“so, lasted not long at all, and… then she said it was okay and that she wanted me to cum one more time, so i was like… yeah, obviously i’m not going to say no that. and i’m pretty sure i was still hard at that point anyway.”

“wait- so, you finished four times?” jeff gasped.

“oh yeah.” eddie nodded, “so like- oh, dude, i was so sensitive. and it was like- she was saying some really… uh… i mean, i like, i love her, so everything she was saying meant more- but- but she was…” eddie cleared his throat and looked down in his lap, “i dunno, she called me beautiful and stuff- told me that she wanted to look after me, and love me.”

the car fell silent.

eddie laughed nervously, refusing to look up at any of them, “as a dude who’s been ran from his whole life, that- that’s just kind of- hmm.”

there was a long silence for a moment, and then eddie saw gareth’s hand reach out to lay over his boot softly. grant hummed and said,

“it makes you fall a little more in love, huh?” he swallowed, “i know the feeling.”

eddie smiled up at him, thankful he wasn’t so alone, “yeah, well-“ he let out a little laugh, “anyway, i just… i didn’t last much longer then that and- oh, dude, she made me hold it back,” his mood switched instantly, bright and excited again, “and like i was crying and begging her to cum, and she just… oh, dudes, she slapped me and it was so hot.”

“she slapped you?” grant asked, “and you liked it?”

“yeah!” eddie exclaimed, “i asked her to do it again, and she was like, oh you like that? pathetic, and i was like, god fucking please, mo-“ he cleared his throat and continued on, “god fucking please do it again.”

“no, no.” gareth shook his head with a low little chuckle, and they were all smirking at him, “you called her something. what did you call her?”

“nothing.” eddie shook his head, “i don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“lies,” gareth hummed, “you tell lies.”

“it’s mo… something mo.” jeff added, “he called her something mo.”

the boys all started to hum, making that sound over and over again, trying to think of what it could be that he called you. eddie sunk down in his chair, hiding his face behind his hair and hands and denied denied denied, begging them all to shut up.

“hang on!” gareth gasped and fucking laughed, “do you call her- you call her mommy, don’t you?”

eddie groaned and sunk lower into his seat.

“holy shit!” jeff laughed, “you call your stepmother, mommy in bed.”

“that’s such a weird sentence.” grant muttered.

eddie groaned again, “just- shut up… she likes it, okay?”

gareth laughed again, “aww, he’s embarrassed.”

eddie kicked him.

“did mommy take your virginity, bunny?” grant teased.

“all of you, die!” eddie mumbled.

“did mommy take good care of you?” jeff asked with a sick pout.

“i hate all of you so much.” eddie grumbled, “i wish all of you the worst in your afterlives after i’ve murdered you each with my bare hands.”

they all laughed.

“man, we’re just teasing, calm down.” gareth nudged eddie’s knees, “steph calls me daddy all the time, so- it’s like, weird… but it’s not as weird as you think.”

“yeah, we’ve played around with it before.” jeff said, gesturing to grant, “i mean, it’s not for us but, it’s cool if you’re into it.”

eddie peaked out though his hair, “you’re just saying that.”

“no, for real.” gareth hummed, “it’s okay. don’t be embarrassed. sex is weird, everybody likes something mildly fucked up- were freaks, it’s expected of us.”

eddie sighed and sat back up, sipping his shake again, “i dunno, she just- i… you know that chick i almost hooked up with ages ago?”

they all hummed and nodded.

“she ran off because i accidentally called her that- mommy.” eddie shrugged, “i didn’t mean too, but she was calling me a good boy so like-“

“ah, yeah…” gareth winced, “i mean, you weren’t wrong for it.”

“but… but i didn’t- y/n just kinda, she called herself mommy a few times like, in normal conversation a while ago and- oh dudes, after grad i got hammered and she took me home and helped me to bed and undress and like, i called her mommy and tried to get her into bed- it was terrible!”

they laughed and gareth swatted his knee, “you’re an idiot.”

“i know.” eddie smiled.

“so, she slapped you?” jeff asked, all of them now had eager eyes, waiting for his story to continue.

“and choked me and-“ he shrugged, “it was so hot, and then she finally let me cum and i- have you ever heard of subspace?”

grant and gareth shook their heads, but jeff had.

“it’s like, you kinda disappear?”

“yeah.” eddie sighed, “it was like- the best feeling in the world. i was just floating, and nothing hurt or anything. i felt like, so good. and then when i came down- and i was out for hours apparently, she explained what had happened to me.”

“what is it?” gareth asked.

“it’s like- she said some subs go into it when their body gets overwhelmed and they trust their partner enough to let go. she’s had lots of subs before that went there, and she said i looked like i was about to disappear which is why she kept telling me i was safe with her.”

“oh, so it’s like… you just kind of relax?”

“i think so?” eddie hummed, “i don’t really know, but i know it felt good. and- and she looked after me. cleaned me up, and braided my hair and stayed up for hours to make sure i’d be okay when i came out of it- because you can’t speak or anything i think, when you go there. at least i couldn’t. she said you can’t give consent there either. and like- i dunno, she just held me and it was nice.”

“huh.” grant hummed, “sounds really nice.”

“yeah, it is- but like, there’s a lot more to it than you think.”

“it kinda sounds like a nice way to lose your virginity.” gareth said.

“yeah, it was.” eddie laughed softly, “it was really nice- i mean, kinky and violent but like, nice.”

“huh…” gareth nodded, “is that all?”

eddie nodded and then hummed and shook his head, “well, like- i don’t know. she- this morning was really nice. she made me breakfast and wanted to bring it to me in bed, but i woke up. and- i- she was just- it felt very… domestic.” he hummed and tried to gather his thoughts, “we took a shower before i dropped her to work, and she washed my hair and then like, cleaned my face and shit too- she just didn’t let me do it myself- even dried my hair and stuff after.”

“well-“ jeff leant forward, “the subspace can last ages after, right? maybe she thought you were still in it?”

“or maybe it’s like… a kink thing.” gareth added, “like… feeding into the mommy kink. maybe it’s age play?”

eddie considered both of those options, and they both seemed legit.

“or… and, here me out here, boys,” grant cleared his throat, “or, maybe… she like… loves you back?”

“nope.” eddie shook his head, a stern hand swinging out, “no. no way- dude, don’t even put that thought in my head! i’m gonna- you can’t just- mhm! no. nope, no, no way, okay? she doesn’t- i’m- i’m her goddamned step son. plus! she said all of her subs are just sexual, and she continuously referred to me as one! she’s not in love with me, okay? she’s just- she can’t be. she. cant. be.”

silence lulled over the car and eddie looked at them all sternly. grant circled his cup and the ice clinked around before he took a loud sip. and that was that. they all nodded and eddie was glad.

you didn’t love him.

you couldn’t love him.

that just wouldn’t happen.

would it?

“anyway…” gareth slumped back in his chair, “i think i need to dump steph-“

“finally!” jeff groaned and all the boys started making noises of agreement.

**

part 19

i love the corroded coffin boys all being silly little teenagers (even though they’re all 19-21) so much!!

[catierambles]

Alternate Instincts Ch.19

Stephanie and Sy were sitting out on the porch, drinking coffee, the mist and fog from the dawn lingering among the trees.

“Ever thought about getting a hot tub?” She asked, taking a sip from her mug. “You have the room for it.” She watched the thought cross over his features and rolled her eyes at the grin that stretched over his face. She didn't know what he was thinking, but she could guess. They both looked over at the sleek black sedan that came up the access road, parking by Geralt's bike. The man that stepped out was smartly dressed in a tailored suit that looked expensive, his black hair combed neat, his strong jaw clean shaven. He buttoned the suit coat, tugging it straight before heading towards the cabin.

“Help you?” Sy called out.

“You would be Markus Syverson, yes?” He asked and Sy nodded. “And this must be the infamous Ms. Daniels.”

“Infamous?” She asked with an arched brow.

“Well, it's not every day that a human becomes the Mate of five wolves, now is it?” He asked rhetorically. “I didn't introduce myself, how rude of me. I'm Napoleon Solo, a representative of the Pack Council.”

“Haven't I seen you on TV doing press conferences?” Stephanie asked and he gave a small, somewhat embarrassed, smile.

“That would be me, yes. Apparently I look good in front of a camera.”

“Well, careful you don't scuff your fancy shoes on the path.” Sy said and August came out of the cabin with his own mug.

“Leon?” He asked, arching a brow at him.

“Good morning, August.”

“You two know each other?” Sy asked, looking back and forth between them. August didn't look happy to see him, but then he didn't have an expression on his face.

“Past life.” Napoleon said, “May I?”

“Yeah, let's head back inside.” Sy said and he and Stephanie pushed up from their chairs. “After you.” They filed into the house with Stephanie in the lead.

“Would you like coffee, Mr. Solo?” She asked.

“Napoleon, please, and yes, coffee would be wonderful, thank you.”

“Any special way you take it?”

“We can't do none of that latte cappuccino half-foam whatevers.” Sy said, setting his mug down and folding his arms over his chest.

“Sy.” Stephanie said, “Don't be a dick.”

“Black with no sugar is fine.” Napoleon said, not rising to Sy's rudeness and Stephanie came out of the kitchen a moment later with a mug, handing it to him. “Thank you.” He said, taking a sip and humming slightly in approval. “Good coffee.”

“I brought my coffee grinder. Makes night and day difference when you grind the beans yourself.” She said with a shrug.

“What're you doing here, Leon?” August asked.

“Yes, business.” He said, “August, you should know that I shared the information you had me dig up with the rest of the Council.”

“Figured you would.”

“About Steph's accident?” Sy asked and August nodded, “The fancy mouthpiece is your contact?”

“Markus.” Stephanie said.

“What?”

“It's fine, Ms. Daniels.” Napoleon said, “I've been called worse.”

“Still.” She said, leveling a look at Sy. “If you can't stop yourself from being rude, you can stay silent.” He just held his hands up in surrender before tucking them in the front pocket of his hoodie.

“Leon.” August said and Napoleon looked away from the interaction, a small smile on his face.

“Yes.” He said, “I assume you dug into it as I did and you know that the blood Ms. Daniels received during the procedures to save her life was tracked back to a wolf up in Washington State?” August nodded, “Until now, we assumed a human receiving wolf blood would have no effect on the human, seeing as lycanthropy isn't transmitted via blood.”

“You're not taking her.” Mike said, running down the stairs, skipping the last couple entirely. He sounded out of breath, as if he had been shocked awake.

“Mikey?” Sy asked.

“I was afraid this might happen.” He said, “You're not taking her to some lab somewhere to be poked and prodded so they can try to figure out just how much the wolf blood she got changed her.”

“Mr. Syverson, the Pack Council—”

“The Pack Council can shove it.” Sy said, “Mike's right. You're not takin' her.”

“Sy.” August said.

“No.” Sy said, “She's not goin' anywhere. We're in my territory, this is my pack, and she's my Mate.”

“Our Mate.” August reminded him, “If they decide to push it, they'll—”

“They'll what?” Sy asked, “Send out a fuckin' Cleaner? Are the Council really that much a buncha babies that don't like bein' told no?”

“She's not a wolf.” Geralt said, having materialized behind Mike making him jump.

“Jesus.” He whispered.

“Stephanie isn't a wolf, she doesn't fall under Council control.” He said as Mike moved away, the Beta going to Stephanie and laying his head on her shoulder, “If she disappears somewhere to be “examined”, it'll be a shit storm when it gets out.”

“If it gets out.” Napoleon said.

“When it gets out.” Geralt reiterated, “They can send as many of their attack dogs as they want, it won't matter.”

“Hold up.” Stephanie said, “It's getting towards making threats and I'd rather this not get ugly. Mr. Solo—Napoleon, is that why you're here? To take me back to the Pack Council to be examined?”

“No.” He said simply.

“See?” She said, looking at the others, “You guys were freaking out over nothing.”

“Not entirely.” He amended, “Ms. Daniels—Stephanie, if I may. As I said before, we didn't think a human receiving lycanthropic blood would have any impact on them, but I went over the medical records from your accident after I sent them to August. You healed in record time with no scars and you should have had extensive scarring, even just from the surgeries. They had to open your chest to relieve the pressure on your collapsed lungs, Stephanie.” She was quiet, “Doctors called it a miracle, but we weren't out in the open yet and none of them were wolves so they couldn't have known.”

“If you ain't here to take her away,” Sy said, “Why are you here?”

“The Council sent me because I know August, and I've worked with Mr. Rivian, sort of, when Ferals were a little more...showy before they were disposed of.” He said, “Stephanie, you don't feel like a wolf, but you don't...” He paused, “There is something there, like an afterthought.”

“Passive carrier.” Geralt said.

“If you'd like to call it that. It certainly fits. She would have shifted long before now had she been infected, but like I said, she doesn't feel like a wolf, but she doesn't feel entirely human, either.” Napoleon said.

“Yeah, I know what you mean.” Sy agreed, “She ain't a wolf, but there's somethin' there that our wolves are pickin' up on.”

“Leon.” August said, “Why are you here.”

“The Pack Council is requesting that Stephanie come back to a local office to be examined by a specialist in lycanthropy. Mr. Rivian is correct. If they try to take her by force, it would be a PR nightmare. One, or all, of you are more than welcome to accompany her if you suspect any ulterior motive.”

“I'll go.” August said.

“We're all goin'.” Sy said and went over to the stairs, Geralt moving out of the way. “Walt! Put the shotgun away and get down here!”

“Shotgun?” Stephanie asked, her fingers moving through Mike's hair idly.

“My phone is set to vibrate a certain way if the gun safe in my room is unlocked.” He said, digging his phone out of his sweatpants pocket, “Only got a huntin' rifle and a twelve gauge in there. Figured he went for the twelve gauge as we're dealin' with close range. A chest full of buck shot wouldn't have killed ya, Solo, but it would have sent a damn good message and mussed your suit.”

“Thank you for your restraint, this is Armani.” He said, tugging the jacket straight.

[finkinthisfrew]

Anything (Pt.3)

A Matty Healy Fanfic

cw: sexual tension? lol

Chapter 3

Poking my head out of the bathroom, I walked through what must have been the man's bedroom. Not wanting to be too nosy, I quickly walked out of the room, avoiding looking around too much.

Shuffling down the unfamiliar hallway, I admired the comfort of my new outfit. I had chosen a black, very soft, and very worn-in hoodie, and a pair of warm grey drawstring sweatpants that pooled at my ankles, adorned in thick white knit socks. It all smelled so comforting- something warm and spicy mixed with something else familiar that I couldn't quite put my finger on. 

The concrete walls and ceilings continued through the hallway, but the floor was charming old hardwood. A few photos adorned a long rustic console that ran along the hall. I couldn't help but look at them- one of someone who was most likely his mother, another of him with his arms around three men, and a photobooth strip of him with one of the three men from the previous photo. My heart dropped a little at the bottom square, a picture of him and the other man kissing.

Of course, it had to be too good to be true... I thought to myself. 

But I thought back to the moment we shared in the bathroom. There's no way I was the only one that felt whatever that was back there. Or was I truly just concussed?

I continued down the hall and stepped into a breathtaking room.

I stared at the giant wall entirely made up of gridded windows. Beyond the window wall was a patio full of greenery- a private little oasis. The ceilings soared in the giant room that housed what looked like the kitchen, living room, and dining room. The decor was artistic and modern while still looking homey and lived in. I nearly bumped into the vintage pool table that sat to the left of the doorway, I was so breath taken.

It became even more unbelievable when I remembered that we were supposed to be above the coffee shop. 

"You look lovely." I turned to see the man smiling cheekily behind the kitchen island as he plucked ice cubes out of a tray and into a bag. He was now wearing a brown striped knit crewneck with black trousers. His wet hair was pushed back into a ballcap. He looked so effortlessly handsome. I smiled back at him as I momentarily thought back wistfully to when I could see his tattoos through his shirt.

"How are you feeling, still cold?" he asked, his brows now furrowing as he rushed over to the couch to pick up a large orange blanket.

"A little, but the clothes and the tea are helping. Thank you for that, by the way."

He nodded his head affirmatively as he put the blanket around my shoulders. He gestured to the couch.

"You have nothing to thank me for, don't be silly. Now your burn, how is your burn?" he asked as I sat down, him continuing to bundle me up in the blanket, eyes looking up at me intently.

My heart skipped a beat. I was so touched by how caring and concerned he was. I was a total stranger to this man, and yet he treated me like kin.

"It's a lot better actually. I don't know if it's the painkillers or just that I'm going numb from the pain, but it's not nearly as bad" I said, as he winced in response. 

He promptly stood up and strode over to the kitchen island, picking up the bag of ice and wrapping it in a hand towel. I saw him start to reach to put the ice on me and then stop himself, putting it in my hand instead.

He sat down in a large armchair as I put the ice on my chest, any pain I still felt immediately relieved.

"Thank you... what's your name?" I said, realizing.

A mix of emotions riddled his face. He looked slightly surprised, but pleasantly. And definitely happy. I wondered if he didn't expect me to have asked, maybe he thought I would have just left out the door after he left me on my own in the bathroom.

"Matty. Well, technically it's Matthew, but everyone including my own mother calls me Matty. And what's yours?" he asked.

"Anna. Sometimes people call me Anne, but mostly just Anna."

"Anna," he repeated, almost savouring the word, analyzing how it felt on his tongue. He smiled again. After a moment of comfortable silence, he asked "So what do you do, Anna?"

"I'm an artist," I answered. "I do a lot of different things, but ceramics is my primary medium. What about you?"

"Oh cool! I'm also an artist," his eyes lit up as he continued. "A musician, actually. I play in a band with some friends, but your art sounds much more fascinating. Your accent, you must not be from here?"

"No, I'm from Canada. I'm here doing an artist residency at the gallery just down the street from here actually."

"How long are you here for?" he asked, keenly.

"Five more months."

His face dropped a little, but before I could register its meaning, he asked "So how do you like London so far? Is this your first time visiting?"

"Oh, I love it so far! I mean, I've only been here a month, but I already love it. My apartment is great, and the studio I work out of is perfect. I haven't tried too much in terms of food, but I have tried a few places and the food's been amazing..." I trailed off, then remembered, "Oh, my cookies!"

He must have known exactly what I was talking about because he promptly stood up and walked out of the room and into the hall. A few moments later he returned with my brown paper bag. "I know what these puppies are worth," he smiled as he watched my face light up.

"Yes, oh my god, thank you! These are my favourite, and they almost always sell out" I said as he handed me the bag. 

"Oh I know," he responded. "I had to tell the owner she wasn't allowed to sell me them to me anymore after I ate two a day for six weeks straight when I first moved in here."

I laughed as I opened the bag and saw the cookies were still intact, as the smell started to make my mouth water. 

"Would you like one?" I offered.

"Are you sure? I know those are hard to come by."

"Of course," I scoffed. "You've taken such sweet care of me, it would make me happy to be able to repay you."

"I wish you wouldn't act like I was some knight in shining armour, as if I wasn't also the dragon that almost killed you," he groaned again into his hands. "You really are too kind. Actually..." he paused. "I wanted to ask you- would you like to stay for a coffee? The least I could do is replace the one I made you drop."

I hesitated. I was in a stranger's apartment, with a man I had just met. I didn't want to overstay my welcome. But I felt so at home with Matty. I already felt like we were friends, and he was just too sweet and handsome for me to want anything other than to have a coffee with him.

"I'd love to," I replied with a smile.

His face broke into a bright-eyed smile, my heart once again sent into overdrive from his beauty. 

"You stay right there and I'll go grab us the coffees. You were drinking something iced- a latte?" 

I nodded in response.

"I'll be right back."

Not more than five minutes later he reappeared with two coffees in his hands, both iced this time, which made me smile. He sat back down on the couch as we shared the cookies and continued to chat about everything under the sun. We talked about music, the type of music he made, our favourite bands, what my art looked like, our favourite tv shows, all interspersed with moments of recognition of how much we had in common. I felt like we could talk for ages, and before I knew it, I had glanced over at the clock on the wall and saw that three hours had passed since he'd come back from the coffee shop, even though it had only felt like one.

"I really should get going," I said, standing up, not wanting to overstay my welcome.

"Oh," he said following suit, his voice laced with disappointment. He tried to cover it up with a more chipper tone. "Alright then. Let me call you an Uber," he said as we walked towards the staircase that lead down to the front door.

"That's really not necessary, I can just take the tube."

"Absolutely not. I don't send my burn victims to fend for themselves on public transit. As much as I'd love an excuse to nurse you back to health again, I'm not letting you go on there in such a state," he said too busy concentrating on his phone to notice me blush at his words. He looked so cute frowning down at his phone with such determination. "Where can I send you to? Do you have a friend that could take care of you? Or a boyfriend?" his voice hitched before he said 'boyfriend'.

I shook my head with a little smile. "No, I actually don't really know anyone here other than my landlord and my residency mentor, and I don't know either of those well enough to accept me in this state." 

He looked at me in disbelief.

"Besides, I feel so much better. The warm clothes and the ice have helped so much," I hesitated before I added "And your company. I think that helped a lot too. This has been really lovely getting to know you." I smiled at him and he beamed back at me with a giant smile, clearly very happy. He passed me his phone to let me enter my address and I tried not to blush as I felt his gaze on me. I could feel myself failing as my cheeks burned.

"Thank you for everything," I said as I stepped forward to hug him. He immediately reciprocated, wrapping his arms around me. He smelled of that warm spicy smell that I smelled on my new outfit, it was so comforting, almost intoxicating. I couldn't help but melt into his chest, inhaling what I knew could only be my new favourite drug. We hugged for what could only be described as too long for two people who had just met, swaying a bit as neither of us wanted it to end. 

Eventually, we pulled away as he said "This really has been so nice getting to know you, Anna. You're a really lovely girl." His eyes radiated sincerity as he looked down into mine. We stood there looking at each other for a few moments, tension building. Once again chickened out and broke eye contact, dropping my gaze to his chest, the same moment I could have sworn I saw him begin to lean towards me. I was already kicking myself for it when he said, "If only I hadn't started this relationship off by pummelling you to the ground and burning you to a crisp before giving you hypothermia," he said, groaning as he put his forehead on my shoulder, hiding in embarrassment. 

I laughed as I patted his back. 

Eventually, he pulled his head back. I noted how I already missed his touch.

This time I couldn't ignore his lips. They were too perfect not to want to kiss. I watched as he looked up from my lips, leaning in again, just a fraction as if to ask permission. I wanted to tell him he didn't need permission. Leaning in slowly, taking in the sweet colour of his lips, I looked back up into his eyes one last time. 

*DING*

His phone rang as the Uber driver arrived.

Both startled, shaken from the intense moment, we took a step back.

"Your car is here. Here, let me help you with your shoes," and before I could decline, he rushed over with my boots and offered his arm to help me step into them.

My heart swelled at how sweetly he was treating me as I thanked him.

We walked down the stairs together and he opened the door to the car for me as he leaned in one last time to say, "So if you ever need another burn, or fancy some hypothermia, you know where to find me- I'm your guy." he joked before continuing. "Or a coffee. At this point, I think I owe you a lifetime of coffee."

"A coffee would be nice." I smiled at him and savoured how his eyes crinkled as he smiled in response. We looked for just a moment longer into each other's eyes before he gave a sweet little gesture farewell and closed the car door, leaving me to gather my absolutely shaken heart after what I think had been my favourite day I'd ever had. 

[radio-navlee]

Lee!max melt spot and all the fluff- *runs back onto the void chanting In gremlin*

Also make sure to stay hydrated!

YES YES YES YES YES YES (Fic ⬇)

So sorry for not posting more, I have my "where I have been" post pinned <3🤗👻

Today seemed like a normal day at camp. Everyone was eating whatever slop Q.M severed up. Max poked at the 'food' with his plastic fork. "Are we expected to eat this?" Max thought.

"Alright campers!!" David announced. Max rolled his eyes pluging his ears, enough to hear but enough to muffle out David's hyperactive voice.

"Today will be a fun day at the dock!" David said, smiling ear to ear. Max always thought it was creepy how that man could stay happy for so long.

Max unplugged his ears in annoyance. "shit" he whispered. As the whole camp knew, he already embarrassed himself with revealing he cant swim. (and taking classes with David was a definite no) For all he could do was 1, sit at the end of the docks praying not to get called out, and 2, sneak off somewhere and try to enjoy the camp. I don't think I would need to tell you which one Max picked.

"Single file line kids!" David shouted raising one hand in the air and the other over his mouth like a make shift mega phone.

"C'mon kids!" Gwen yawned "Hold on David I left something in the cabin, I'll be back." David gave her a nod and Gwen ran back to the cabin. As Gwen closed the cabin door behind her she turned to start walking back to David when she sees puffy haired 4'6 figure sneaking away into a forest. Gwen blinked and rubbed her eyes, and the small figure had disappeared. "Huh, that surly wont be a problem later!" she thought and continued walking back to David and the rest of the campers.

"Stupid...Camp!" Max thought kicking a rock while walking through a dirt path. Trees blocked out most the sun above him, sure he was still hot wearing his blue hoodie, but he'd never take it off.

"Hey Gwen! You're back!" David said smiling

"Hey wait, wheres Max?"

Gwen's small smile faded to an "uh oh" expression

"I thought he was with you!"

"I thought he was with YOU!"

"Well Clearly not!!" Gwen panicked

"Oh goodness! Watch over the campers I'll try to go find him!" David shouts out running back to the tents. “MAX? MAAAXXX!?” He calls out, he panicked more when nobody called back. “Oh god where could he be?” David thought

“No campers, and no Dav-,” Max sighed but stop when he heard his name being called in the distance, “Damn it!” His face turned to a frown. ‘If David’s out looking for me, it won’t take long for him to search the forest’ “I just need one day of nobody in my face! Just one!” Max stated aloud as if he was trying to prove something,

“The forest! Oh my god he could be anywhere in the forest!!” David said in panic, rushing to the end of the camp and searching the trees

“MAAAAAXXXXX!!” David called out

‘Does he expect me to call back?’ Max thought with a very puzzled expression on his face. He shook the thought off and decided, ‘if I don’t notice him, he won’t notice me’

Max heard David walking below him and praying to god that David doesn’t look up. Max tried to be as quiet as possible, he placed his arm on the extra branch above him. Unlucky for him as the beach above him shook as birds flew away, not very quiet

“Damn it” Max said as David looked up

“Max! There you are!! We’ve been looking for you!”

“Yeah I know, I could hear you!” Max said annoyed

“Alright now, come on down. We have to get back to the dock!” David said reaching his arms out

“No I’m staying up here!”

“Maaxx come on!”

“Nuh uh! You can’t make me camp man!” Max said backing himself to where the branch meets the bark

“You can’t stay up there forever! Come on now!”

“No! Stop it!” Max swatted at David’s hands that where trying to pick him up.

“Stop! Don’t Touch me- Aah!” Max now hang on to the tree branch while David tugged on his legs

“Max if you just let go, we will go back to the dock!”

“Never! I’m not going!”

“Max,” David said moving his hands up to Maxs torso to get a better grasp.

David now tugging on a very dedicated Max, David’s hands on the boys torso and the boys hands hanging onto a branch. Just then David squeezed Maxs sides.

“HEHEY! Don’t do that!!” Max said flinching at the touch

“Sorry did I hurt you Max?” David asked confused

“ No it’s just, ‘This man has to be the most clueless person on the planet!’” Max thought, still trying to hang onto the branch

David squeezed his side again,

“AH- David!! You’re going to kill me!!” Max jumped. Davids face lit up, max wasn’t hurt! He’s just ticklish!

“Ohhh you’re just ticklish Max!”

“Oh jee? Really? I would have never guess!” Max said with sarcasm. Max took this opportunity to try to climb back up the tree.

"Oh no you dont, max come 'ere!" David squeezed Maxs sides over and over again

“GAHA-!” Max almost bursted out laughing using his free hand to cover his mouth, muffling the laughter

“Aww max, dont give me that! Cmon laugh for me!” David fake pouted, scribbling along Maxs tummy. Max shook his head fast, almost losing his grip on the branch.

“Dahavid!!” Max whined, David began to start working his way up Maxs body now spidering along his armpits.

“Max I’m only doing this for your own good!” David stated

“NAHAHA!! DAVID!!” Max squealed, letting go of the branch and falling into David’s arms

“see now that wasn’t hard was it?” David teased, reaching down to wiggle his fingers in his neck

“NO! Uhh, I mean, ech-em,” Max panicked shooting his hands ageist David’s to stop his fingers.

“Not the neck..” Max said embarrassed and quiet

“I’m sorry max, what was that?” David said leaning his ear down to hear better

“I uhh, I said not the neck ok?” Max’s face went a shade of red, god this was so embarrassing!

“why not the neck Max?” David teased

“you know!” Max raised his voice

“ok ok! But now we have to go back to the dock, Gwen is worried your setting fire to the camp.”

“Fine whatever!” Max said angry, he crossed his arms and pouted inside of David’s arms. David, carrying max like sack of potatoes, smiled giving him a few more pokes to the side. Max fell into a giggle fit and squirms.

“stahaap! Dahavid!!”

“alright,” David hummed walking back to camp near the docks

“Ugh thank god you found him! I was about to start filing a missing child’s poster! Geez Max your parents would probably kill me if we lost you!” Gwen blabbed running up to David seeing Max with him.

Max’s expression went from normal to a ‘oh yeah.. my parents..’ kind of expression. Gwen noticed and a confused light bulb went off in her head. She didn’t mention it but continued to yap to David about how she searched everything and everywhere and she was jus so relieved that they found their camper.

good thing Max didn’t think about Gwen’s comment for to long when he saw Niki and Neil and decided to join next to them on whatever they where doing.

(omg idk why this took me so long to write? Scary writers block🙁 CYA!! LOVE U!!)

[sunshinejeonglixie]

SKZ When you have a panic attack

tags: sfw, gender neutral reader, panic attacks mentioned but not described, fluffy comforting skz, could be platonic or romantic whatever you interpret tbh

a/n: i have pretty severe anxiety struggles & skz music + content always comforts me so i thought this was a cute idea to write

!!Everything written here is fiction, not meant to be taken as real life, if anything here makes you uncomfortable please just block & move on!!

Chan

dad mode

nothing will convince me he doesn’t have some sort of fidget toy bag in his backpack for the members or himself & he’ll let you use them too

snacks & water

hoodies for you to hide in

Lee Know

cat pictures for comfort

how can you panic when his cats are so cute?

good at creating distractions

wanna hear about the new choreo he’s making to take your mind off of whatever you’re stressed about? You best bet you’re getting every single detail.

will make your comfort food later to show his love

Changbin

strong hugs

he is loud always but if you need a minute of silence he has never been so quiet

literally will do anything you need from him, would get the moon if that’s what you needed to feel calm and safe again

wanna snuggle with his munchlax plushie gyu? hell yea you can

Hyunjin

also a hugger like Changbin but much softer

humming & singing to give you something else to listen to and focus on

plays with your hair (even if its not that long or anything)

lets you sit and just play with his hands (this sounds so calming to me so this is literally just something I want lmao)

Han

oh boy this man is like the number one panic attack comforter out there

understands how you feel and just wants to listen to whatever you need

will share his national geographic videos and facts with you

also has a bag of fidget toys like Chan

Felix

literal sunshine put into a human

counting his freckles as a grounding technique (another thing I just think would calm me during my panic attacks lmao)

brownies, cookies, other baked goods for comfort

deep voice humming (sounds so comforting omg)

Seungmin

also letting you borrow his hoodies like Chan

just holds you (like this man is not a huge physical affection kinda guy but for you he is the biggest softie & always hugging or holding hands)

will lend you his puppy plushie like Changbin will lend you gyu

I.N

the biggest smiles to try and cheer you up

lets you pinch & poke his cheeks

hand holding

will sing your fave songs for you