#'this is my favorite song with the number 2 spelled out in the title!' like cmoooon that'd be fun | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

colbyflask · 9 months

Text

oops - a prelude

so i literally made this blog(?) three months and ten days ago and then never touched it again, in classic me fashion. Isn't that hilarious?? in the time since then, I got laid off from my job (exactly two months ago!!), I saw paramore in concert, flew to a city that is 3 hours away by car to dog-sit (the flight was 30 minutes - yes i am in my taylor swift era), and went to a wedding. these are probably the most life-altering things that happened to me in those three months. that's literally a whole fiscal quarter, I think. but this blog (again - is that what this is???) isn't about that. it's about me listening to music.

The only things I have turned on for my ear holes to listen to since February (how tf do you spell that??) are paramore and gorillaz (and the new fall out boy album but not as extensively). i do not think i am emotionally ready to capture the perfection that is paramore's discography in my dum dum words, so i want to start with gorillaz (since their music is kind of what kickstarted this whole writing experiment tbh).

when I started this thing, I think I had only listened to 3 of their seven albums. That number is now up to five. My initial plan was to go song-by-song on their self titled album, but I'm not going to do that anymore (like I will eventually, but that's not what I want to start with). I have now decided that I will start with what I'm currently listening to - the now now. That's such a funny name for an album (and is also why I didn't listen to it for a while LOL).

I want to tell you (yes, you - the person reading this) how I even started listening to gorillaz (also my brother and I have a joke where we call them "the gorillaz" but then we say it in funny voice so every time I type it, that's what I'm thinking of). I want to say I've always been aware of them (or at least their music, not necessarily their lore or concept). Clint Eastwood would come on one of the radio stations I would listen to in high school pretty often, and I had heard Feel Good Inc. at some point throughout the years. I absolutely saw people wearing the demon days shirts. While I enjoyed the music when we crossed paths, I never really dug any deeper. I do have a faint memory of checking out their music videos and being a bit put off by the animation (I think it was 2-D's eyes that creeped me out) and kind of put it on the back burner until last year (in hindsight, it was probably for the best that I didn't start listening until I was an adult because I would've been absolutely insufferable with it). also - the animation/art style has really grown on me. It fits with who the characters are, and I love how it's evolved since their conception.

The beginning is a little hazy, but I know it started with hearing Clint Eastwood again on the radio. It was as if the spirit of Del possessed me - after that, I had it on repeat on Spotify. I have this thing where I don't like to not know the words of songs (it might be fall out boy trauma, or maybe it's the lingering of perfectionism I like to say I've gotten over but totally haven't), and I listened to it over and over until I got most of the words down. I peeped over to their artist page, and did the same exact thing with Feel Good Inc. (it's quite honestly one of my favorite singles of all time and I have yet to get sick of it). I think I also listened to dirty harry a few times because of that one tiktok trend with the outfits (I hate how central tiktok is to this because I like to think I am not online as much as I am, but alas, here I am). This is the part where it gets hazy - Cracker Island (the song). I could not tell you how or when I first heard it (it was probably a youtube tiktok short), but when I did, I was absolutely obsessed. It was one of those rare moments where an artist captures so much of what you like on a single track. I wanted more, but I (stupidly) didn't seek it out.

Last year, Spotify wrapped did a silly goofy thing where your favorite/most listened to artists (that recorded a video) would popup and say "hey thanks for listening this year." Scrolling through mine made sense, until I saw a weird looking green man on my screen. Although I had only listened to like four songs, I listened enough to have gorillaz say thank you to me at the end of the year (and to promote their new album, of course). This is one of the few times where I feel like the word flabbergasted really describes my true emotion - first of all, had I really listened enough to make this green dude appear?? Second, who IS this green dude?? Third, WHY IS HE BRITISH??? If you're curious, this is the video in question. Knowing what I know now, this was honestly perfect marketing. It fits in SO well with what the band is and what their newest art is conveying. I showed this video to people and was like "what in the world IS this??" and then we laughed - we laughed into the new year.

And into the new year we went. Cracker Island came out sometime in February (that's kind of an iconic month for me now, huh?), and I could not tell you when I decided to listen to the whole thing. I don't remember if it was that month or in March, but boy am I glad I listened to it. Part of the appeal to me was it's name - why is this song and album called cracker island??? I had to figure that out (and whether or not I found out will be revealed in that review...).

After watching the two music videos for Cracker Island, I began to have questions. Who were these four people that composed this band? What's their story?? Why do they look like that?? Who is really making this music??? What in the world was happening in the Cracker Island and Silent Running music videos??? Who is this green guy and why did he kiss that old lady??? Luckily for me, this video popped up in my YouTube recommended and began to unravel some of the mystery. By the end of it, I was hooked. I wanted to know the history behind these four strangers. I wanted to know how all of this worked. And that's how I started listening to Gorillaz.

The first thing I had to figure out what everyone's name was - it took me a little bit to sort out the names and their instrumental roles (the green guy is called Murdoc??? and he was replaced by that guy from the Powerpuff Girls for an album??? what??? who is Paula Cracker??). I scoured wikipedia, read their brief character biographies, and had more questions than answers. What the hell is a phase??? Noodle shipped herself in a Fedex box?? why is there a 7 year gap between albums??? how did they make these albums???

tangent here - I used to play guitar hero as a kid (who didn't??) and on one of my favorite songs to play was song 2 by blur on bass. it took me an embarrassing amount of time to figure out that the singer of blur was the same dude from the gorillaz. like, I think I figured it out last year. what the heck. anyway it's one of my favorite fun facts.

In my research, I learned of the importance of an album called Plastic Beach. From YouTube comments to Wikipedia reviews, I deduced that it's their magnum opus. As a result, I decided I wanted to save that album for last. The listening order for the rest of them was a bit more variable. Here's what my listening order is/likely to be.

Demon Days (2005): after seeing it on so many shirts (that's a joke - it's because it was the album with feel good inc. and dirty harry), I figured I start off strong with this one. I 100% made the right choice

The Fall (2010): in my research i learned that this was a weird one, and I was too scared to start with anything else. I was bored at work (back when I still had a job lol) and put it on in the background. I still need more time with it, but it's still pretty solid. More to come.

Gorillaz (2001): This album is so fun - and it's also the only physical album I own. It was also the album I was jamming through when I decided to start this blog. I have notes written down for this one, so I'm looking forward to writing about her.

Humanz (2017): The album art on this one creeped me out (why does Murdoc look like john lennon) but the music is spectacular. I'm excited to write about this one.

The Now Now (2018): My current listen - I'll be writing about this one first!!

Song Machine (2020): One of two albums I have yet to listen to - is this even considered an album?? Like I know it is, but the song conglomeration is a little confusing to me, so I'm hoping I can figure out how to listen to it.

Plastic Beach (2010): I'm so afraid that this isn't going to live up to the hype I'm building up in my mind. But I'm also so looking forward to listening - rhinestone eyes is a provoking song that i could listen to forever and I'm anxiously anticipating listening to its relatives. I love a good concept album, and I think this is what that's supposed to be.

I'm leaving out some of the peripheral tracks (think the d-sides and laika come home) for the time being. Maybe they'll be the epilogue to this little project. I'm hoping to get this listening party done before the year is over - ideally before december. The majority of the past seven years, my top artist has been another british band that starts with a G, but this is the year they're ultimately dethroned (there was a year where a certain band that I will not name took top billing, but we're not going to talk about that because they're supposedly retired and I don't want to write about them).

I think this concludes our little prelude here - I wrote so much. It absolutely is not proofread, and i'm not starting everything out capitalized. it's not intentional or purposeful - I just didn't feel like hitting shift all the time. Until next time - I'll see you on The Now Now.

'-V

August 15, 2023

#music #music review #taylor swift #taylor swift eras #gorillaz #2d gorillaz #murdoc niccals #noodle gorillaz #russel hobbs #cracker island #demon days #the fall #gorillaz the album #humanz #the now now #powerpuff girls #spotify #i want to put a funny tag but it's almost midnight

1 note · View note

beneaththetangles · 2 years

Photo

Reader’s Corner: Kaiju No. 8 (Vol. 3), Trapped in a Dating Sim, and The Phantom of the Idol

This week, we cover the thrilling new volumes of Kaiju No. 8, the volume of Trapped in a Dating Sim that picks up the story from where the anime left off, the first installment of The Phantom of the Idol (the anime adaptation of which premiered last week), and so much more!

Witch Watch, Vol. 2

At the end of volume one, I was left worrying that the easy, breezy rom-com elements of Witch Watch were quickly being left behind for darker, more mysterious fare, as ogre Moi seeks to protect his childhood friend and witch, Nico, from a disaster foretold in a prophecy. But while volume two does begin by referring to that prediction, most of the material settles right back into the same hilarious and cute territory that made the first release such a winner. Moi’s role as Nico’s familiar continues to power the story’s scenarios, though now he’s joined by another as well in the form of the crow, Kan. Instead of making him a love rival, however, I’m stoked that this series turns Kan into a cheerleader for Nico as she tries to flip her childhood friendship with Moi into a romantic relationship. The dynamics between these three set up a number of cute and humorous situations, including a romantic one that closes out the volume. And in between is more hilarity, much of it presented in a silly, unexpected way, like the boy who asks Nico for a spell so that he can poop in peace, and the teacher who hides her obsession with the fanart one of her students draws. But look, despite the mention of poo, the humor is so surprisingly clean—it’s also funny, clever, and heartwarming. With only a digital release, this series feels far too under the radar for what it is, which is perhaps the best manga rom-com to premiere in 2022. ~ Twwk

Witch Watch (manga) is published by VIZ Media.

READ: Witch Watch, Vol. 1 Review

Dinosaur Hour, Vol. 1

Has anyone else found manga to be sorely lacking in dinosaurs? I can’t say I am a huge fan of dinosaurs, but my kids are and that was the main reason I read Dinosaur Hour. My kiddo kept telling me how funny this manga is, and I have to admit that even though this is geared towards a younger audience, I found myself laughing a time or two! It is an episodic manga that features a variety of dinosaurs (and I do mean a variety: I could not keep up with even half of the dinosaurs mentioned) in a range of situations that result in shenanigans for all dinosaurs involved. Even though most of the chapters hit the same “beats,” it was still fun to see what the new dinosaur introduced would do. There were some “violent” moments, but nothing definitely bloody, which I appreciated as a parent. My kids and I are bummed to know that we will probably never get a volume two, but even so, it’s one I would still recommend to all ages! I especially think younger audiences who love dinosaurs will enjoy meeting (or seeing old favorites!) in the humorous situations presented in each of these chapters. ~ Laura A. Grace

Dinosaur Hour! is published by VIZ Media.

Phantom of the Idol, Vol. 1

I admit it—I’ve never kept up with an idol manga, nor have I completed an idol anime. But Phantom of the Idol, which now has an anime adaptation, is likely to be the title that changes that for me. It is hilarious, cute, and well thought out. That last bit is what impresses me most about this series in which Niyodo, one half of an idol duo who cares so little about his work that he sometimes even looks up lyrics to the song he’s singing on his cell phone while on stage, partners with Asahi, the ghost of a popular idol who loves her profession so much that she keeps working at it even after her death! Asahi possesses and otherwise trains Niyodo to help him grow as an idol which, as you can imagine, leads to a number of funny gags, but there’s a lot of excellent scenario writing here, too. By the end of volume one, the relationship between Asahi and Niyodo is already well-established, and they work absolutely perfectly as an odd couple—not in a romantic way (not yet), but in how they play off each other, mostly for laughs, though sometimes warmly as well. Asashi has a kind heart and wants the best for Niyodo, who becomes more than his usual “cash it in” self in large part because of the ghost’s earnestness. There are a lot of jokes and a ton of dialogue, enough to advance the volume past simple introductions and into a fun plot involving the three (and apparently only three) women who stan the unloveable Niyodo, and work to increase his group’s prominence as they perform at the, wait for it, Hottie Farm Hot ‘n’ Fresh Farmers’ Market. Yep, this manga is a keeper. ~ Twwk

Phantom of the Idol (manga) is published by Kodansha.

Kaiju No. 8, Vol. 3

One of my favorite ongoing shonen manga series, Kaiju No. 8, continues to release strong, thrilling volumes, with this latest release being no exception! There were multiple points when I literally forgot to breathe while reading! This volume picks up right where volume two ended and throws us right back into the battle at a point where Ichikawa’s life was seemingly on the line. Thankfully, that situation turned out okay, otherwise this review would be very different! However, that doesn’t mean that things are going smoothly for Kafka as we see an intense battle between him and his vice-captain, Hoshina, quickly follow! I have been curious about Hoshina for a while now, and was more than a little starstruck while watching this battle unfold (even if I was also gripping my Kindle in anticipation of how this would affect Kafka). It was absolutely one of the best parts of this volume and highlights why Hoshina is indeed vice-captain! The story calmed down after this intense battle, with a special celebration for the Defense Force, yet the volume’s ending reminds us that while one kaiju may be taken down or stopped, the battle is far from over. It’s definitely a good thing that many of these incredible characters have “leveled up,” including the awesome Shinomiya who continues to shine on the page! Truly, Kaiju No. 8 gets better and better with every release! I am ecstatic to get my preorder because it’s a story I simply can’t get enough of! ~ Laura A. Grace

Kaiju No. 8 is published by VIZ Media. Volume three releases on July 12th.

READ: Kaiju No. 8 Reviews: Vol. 1 // Vol. 2

Trapped in a Dating Sim: The World of Otome Games is Tough for Mobs (Light Novel) Vol. 3

Surely I can’t be the only one to have found the Trapped in a Dating Sim to be—outside of SPY x FAMILY—the most entertaining anime of the spring 2022 season. If you feel similarly, do as I did: Jump into volume three of the light novel series, which continues the story at almost the exact point where the anime concludes, with Leon having overcome the Principality of Fanoss. But what’s this? Leon has been jailed…again? Looks like an opportunity for the Principality to strike again. And indeed, they do, and with fury. Unlike the mixture of action and slice-of-life from previous volumes, this one is pretty much non-stop warfare for more than 500 pages. I loved how volume three makes the series overall resemble a true fantasy series in this way, foregoing many light novel conventions and becoming quite epic in scale by mixing in political intrigue and a new enemy (see the cover) while never forgetting the main cast. Even though I’m in this series mostly for the snark and how it pokes fun at the otome and isekai genres, I’m also 100% in for this more action-focused volume. There’s still snark, though, and Luxion and Leon remain the most compelling duo in the series. And don’t worry, romance isn’t forgotten either, with a couple of surprises in stores, including one that’s meant to be a distractive element for the main character and readers, and one that’s a truly earth-shaking development. ~ Twwk

Trapped in a Dating Sim: The World of Otome Games is Tough for Mobs (light novel) is published by Seven Seas.

Silver Spoon, Vol. 8

While Silver Spoon is full of camaraderie and humor, its world of livestock, crops, and students largely hailing from poor farming backgrounds is nevertheless fertile ground for more dramatic fare that challenges readers to consider the difficulties of real life. The fulfillment of the overarching storylines is still a while away, but in the meantime, volume eight foregrounds the growing tension between what Aki’s family expects of her and what she desires to do, emphasizing this all the more through what occurs to Komaba and his family. The themes of following one’s dreams and the economy of harsh reality blend together in a heartfelt and authentic way that admits the reality of discouragement, while allowing for glittering shonen hope as well. A ton of plot development occurs in volume eight, where the character most in focus may be life itself, though Aki continues to be more and more fleshed out—far more so than is typical for a love interest—in this thoughtful collection of chapters. Silver Spoon is such a consistently excellent series, but these chapters shine among the best, behind only the Pork Bowl arc in their warmth, sadness, and depth. ~ Twwk

Silver Spoon is published by Yen Press.

=====

Reader’s Corner is our way of embracing the wonderful world of manga, light novels, and visual novels, creative works intimately related to anime but with a magic all their own. Each week, our writers provide their thoughts on the works they’re reading—both those recently released as we keep you informed of newly published works and older titles that you might find as magical (or in some cases, reprehensible) as we do.

#Manga #Light Novels #Witch Watch #Dinosaur Hour!#Kyouryuu no Jikan #Phantom of the Idol #Kami Kuzu Idol #Kaiju No. 8 #Kaijuu 8 gou #Trapped in a Dating Sim: The World of Otome Games is Tough for Mobs #Otomege Sekai wa Mob ni Kibishii Sekai Desu #Silver Spoon #Gin no Saji #Reader's Corner #Articles #Author: TWWK #Author: Laura A. Grace

0 notes

cerastes · 2 years

Note

Gimme a very important 3, and maybe a 31 and a 38 if you've got the words to spare, buckaroo

*THE VENDING MACHINE WHIRRS AND GRINDS, DROPPING THE DESIRED SODA*

3. Favorite childhood game?

Easily Donkey Kong Country. It's not an ironic joke or anything when I say I love to play games listening to the DKC or adjacent OSTs, or my love for funny monkey game, it really is my treasured childhood favorite. I think it was a combination of it being The Funny Monkey Game, thus, a fun and vibrant game full of personality, coupled with some really challenging platforming near the end, and David Wise going off every single one of his shits and composing a soundtrack for it that simultaneously is vigorous and bouncy, and yet, that could very well play during a one man expedition of the ruins of a lost civilization.

Another part is that DKC was the one game all of my siblings also enjoyed. I played the most games out of my siblings, in terms of quantity and in terms of dedication to bettering myself at them, but DKC was the one game that all of us liked, so we'd sit around the old, small TV and pass around the controller each life. That certainly was very fun and memorable. I remember keeping my eyes glued on game magazines to see when DKC2 would release, and after that, DKC3.

31. Game with the best theme song?

I think a number of answers apply here, for a number of reasons, mainly the question "What constitutes a Theme Song of any given title?"

About title/main menu music: Believe it or not, I think the first time a main title song truly touched me was Ocarina of Time. I'm not a Zelda fan. The only Zelda game I have played is Ocarina of Time, and by sheer technicality, Wind Waker and Twilight Princess, but only because my brothers tagged me in to beat the final boss since "you're good at fights, Drimo". But, the sheer solemnity and simmering emotion of Ocarina of Time's title theme has stuck with me for a long time. Eventually, it would be Armored Core: For Answer's "Someone Is Always Moving On The Surface" that would establish itself as the apex of title music.

If it's about the track often associated with it: SIMON'S THEME IN SUPER CASTLEVANIA IV, BABY, without a shadow of a doubt, the fact that it plays as you open up whooping undead ass with wild gusto is one thing, but, there's another place where Simon's Theme comes up: Phase 2 of the Dracula final boss fight. At that point, Dracula panics, and is so afraid of Simon that he can only spam the same predictable lightning spell over and over after a variety of tricky, clever fireball spams. Simon's Theme starts playing during this phase, overriding Dracula's because Simon Belmont is the boss fight now. That was the first time a video game made me feel so, so powerful: Not due to giving me huge numbers or big flashy attacks, but simply by virtue of using the conventions of the medium to tell me "You. You are the threat in this room now."

And if it's about sheer memorability: I would say a tie between the incredibly iconic Kingdom Heart's Simple And Clean and GunZ: The Duel's Theme Rock. Simple And Clean, with the accompanying cutscene, encompass I think everything right with being a teenager into anime, whereas GunZ' Theme Rock hits the vibe of "solemn gunslinger loading bullets into the cartridges of his submachineguns, silently, in the corner of an abandoned building, with a glass of whiskey, moments before going out and getting into another meaningful gunfight".

38. Have you tried a game, hated it, then tried again, and loved it?

I mentioned Baroque on this one before, which is an example of something formative to me, incredibly dear, a building block in the Dreamer you know and love nowadays. Now, I'll give a more contemporary answer: Final Fantasy 14.

I started playing FF14 March of 2021, is what I would usually say, but that's when I made Alkelda. I actually did try FF14 before that, many years ago, when Heavensward was the newest thing, and I didn't try it alone, I tried it with Iron, actually. Long story short, we hated the two hours we put into it, and then we played Team Fortress 2 instead that night.

Then, last year, I really needed something to sink my teeth into around that time, and after much deliberation, I said, yeah, alright, let's give this another try, I've heard it's become better. I didn't try the free trial, however, I committed to the bit from the get-go and bought the full pack, which at the time was up to Shadowbringers. I was going to give this a fair try, and I did!

I didn't tell anyone initially because I didn't want to give false hope to anyone that I'd play it, mainly because I was hating ARR really badly. But when I got to Heavensward, the gameplay still sucked balls, but the story picked up hard, and I was enjoying myself. Stormblood, the gameplay was still very, well, unengaging, but I was loving the narrative end of it, so I was treating the whole thing like a Yoko Taro game: Fucking horrendous gameplay, but good music and story, which I normally don't do, but FF14 was popping that hard for me, narratively. Then Shadowbringers hit and now I FINALLY was actually enjoying the gameplay AS WELL as the story.

SO IT TOOK QUITE A BIT OF PATIENCE BUT WE GOT THERE.

#ryo maybe

12 notes · View notes

wits-writing · 3 years

Text

What’s so Funny About Vengeance, the Night, and Batman? – Two Superhero Parodies in Conversation

Back in 2016, the first trailers for Director Chris McKay’s The Lego Batman Movie hit. A spinoff of the take on the iconic hero, voiced by Will Arnett, from 2014’s The Lego Movie. Those trailers spelled out a plot covering how Batman’s life of crimefighting is turned upside down when Robin unexpectedly enters the picture. It was a funny trailer, promising another insightful comedy from the crew behind The Lego Movie. A promise it handily delivered on when it came out in February 2017 with an animated feature steeped wall-to-wall jokes for the sake of mocking Bruce Wayne’s angst filled crusade that can only come from understanding what’s made the character withstand the test of time.

But there was a thought I and others had from seeing that trailer up to watching the actual movie:

“This seems… familiar.”

Holy Musical B@man! is a 2012 fan-made stage production parody of DC Comics’ biggest cash cow. It was produced as the fifth musical from YouTube-based cult phenomenon Starkid Productions, from a book by Matt and Nick Lang, music by Nick Gage and Scott Lamp with lyrics by Gage. The story of the musical details how Robin’s unexpected entrance ends up turning Batman’s (Joe Walker) life of crimefighting upside down. Among Starkids’ fandom derived projects in their early existence, as they’ve mainly moved on to well-received original material in recent years, Holy Musical B@man! is my personal favorite. I go back to it frequently, appreciating it as a fan of both superheroes and musicals. (Especially since good material that touches on both of those isn’t exactly easy to come by. Right, Spider-Man?)

While I glibly summarized the similarities between them by oversimplifying their plots, there’s a lot in the details, both major and minor, that separates how they explore themes like solitude, friendship, love, and what superhero stories mean. It’s something I’ve wanted to dig into for a while and I found a lot in both of them I hadn’t considered before by putting them in conversation. I definitely recommend watching both of them, because of how in-depth this piece goes including discussing their endings. However, nothing I can say will replace the experience of watching them and if I had included everything I could’ve commented on in both of them, this already massive piece would easily be twice as long minimum.

Up front, I want to say this isn’t about comparing The Lego Batman Movie and Holy Musical B@man in terms of quality. Not only are they shaped for vastly different mediums with different needs/expectations, animation versus stagecraft, but they also had different resources at their disposal. Even if both are in some ways riffing on the aesthetic of the 1990s Batman movies and the Adam West TV show, Lego Batman does it with the ability to make gorgeously animated frames packed to the brim with detail while Holy Musical often leans into its low-fi aesthetic of characters miming props and sets to add extra humor. They’re also for different audiences, Lego Batman clearly for all-ages while Holy Musical has the characters cursing for emphasis on a regular basis. On top of those factors, after picking through each of these for everything worth commenting on that I could find, I can’t say which I wholly prefer thanks in part to these fundamental differences.

This piece is more about digging through the details to explore the commonalities, differences, and what makes them effective mocking love letters to one of the biggest superheroes in existence.

(Also, since I’m going to be using the word “Batman” a lot, I’ll be calling Lego Batman just “Batman” and referring to the version from Holy Musical as “B@man”, with the exception of quoted dialogue.)

[Full Piece Under the Cut]

Setting the Tone

The beginning is, in fact, a very good place to start when discussing how these parodies frame their versions of the caped crusader. Each one uses a song about lavishing their respective Batmen with praise about how they are the best superheroes ever and play over sequences of the title hero kicking wholesale ass. A key distinction comes in who’s singing each song. Holy Musical B@man’s self-titled opening number is sung from the perspective of an omniscient narrator recounting B@man’s origin and later a chorus made up of the Gotham citizenry. Meanwhile, “Who’s the (Bat) Man” from Lego Batman is a brag-tacular song written by Batman about himself, even playing diegetically for all his villains to hear as he beats them up.

youtube

Holy Musical opens on a quick recap of Batman’s origin:

“One shot, Two shots in the night and they’re gone And he’s all left alone He’s just one boy Two dead at his feet and their blood stains the street And there’s nothing, no there’s nothing he can do!”

We then get a Bat-dance break as the music goes from slow and moody to energetic to reflect Batman turning that tragedy into the driving force behind his one-man war on crime. Assured by the narrator that he’s “the baddest man that there’s ever been!” and “Now there’s nothing, no there’s nothing he can’t do!” flipping the last lyric of the first verse. For the rest of the opening scene the lyrics matter less than what’s happening to establish both this fan-parody’s version of Batman and how the people of Gotham (“he’ll never refuse ‘em”) view him.

Lego Batman skips the origin recap, and in general talks around the death of the Waynes to keep the light tone going since it’s still a kids movie about a popular toy even if there are deeper themes at play. Instead, it continues a trend The Lego Movie began for this version of the character writing music about how he’s an edgy, dark, awesome, cool guy. While that movie kept it to Batman angry-whiteboy-rapping about “Darkness! NO PARENTS!”, this one expands to more elaborate boasts in the song “Who’s the (Bat) Man” by Patrick Stump:

youtube

“In the darkest night I make the bad guys fall There’s a million heroes But I’m the best of them all!”

Batman singing this song about himself, as opposed to having it sung by others aims the crosshairs of parody squarely on the hero’s ego. His abilities make fighting his villains effortless, like this opening battle is more an opportunity to perform the song than a life-or-death struggle. Even Joker’s aware of that as he shouts, “Stop him before he starts singing!” This Batman doesn’t see himself as missing out on anything in life, even if he still feels that deep down. Being Batman is the coolest thing in the world that anyone would envy. He’s Batman, therefore everyone should envy him.

The songs aren’t only part of the equation for how these two works’ opening scenes establish their leading hero. While both songs are about Batman being cool, they’re separated by the accompanying scenes. Lego Batman keep the opening within the Joker’s perspective until Batman shows up and the action kicks in. Once it does, we’re shown a Batman at the top of his solo-hero game. Meanwhile, Holy Musical’s opening is about B@man building his reputation and by the end of the song he has all the citizens of Gotham singing his praises with the titular lyrics. Both are about being in awe of the title hero, one framed by Joker’s frustration at Batman’s ease in foiling his schemes yet again and the other about the people of Gotham growing to love their city’s hero (probably against their better judgement.)

That’s woven into the fabric of what kind of schemes Batman is foiling in each of these. Joker’s plan to bomb Gotham with the help of every supervillain in Batman’s Rogues Gallery is hilariously high stakes and the type of plan most Batman stories, even parodies, would save for the climax. Neatly exemplified by how that’s almost the exact structure of Holy Musical’s final showdown. Starting with these stakes works as an extension of this Batman’s nature as a living children’s toy and therefore the embodiment of a child’s idea of what makes Batman cool, his ability to wipe the floor with anyone that gets in his way “because he’s Batman.” It also emphasizes Joker as the only member of the Rogues Gallery that matters to Lego Batman’s story, every other Bat-villain is either a purely visual cameo or only gets a couple lines maximum.

The crime’s being stopped by B@man are more in the “Year One” gangster/organized crime category rather than anything spectacle heavy. Though said crimes are comically exaggerated:

Gangster 1: Take these here drugs, put ‘em into them there guns, and then hand ‘em out to those gamblin’ prostitutes! Gangster 2: Should we really be doing these illegal activities? In a children’s hospital for orphans?

These fit into that model of crime the Dark Knight fights in his early days and add tiny humanizing moments between the crooks (“Oh, Matches! You make me laugh like nobody else!”) in turn making the arrival of B@man and the violence he deals out a stronger punchline. Further emphasized by the hero calling out the exact physical damage he does with each hit before warning them to never do crime again saying, “Support your families like the rest of us! Be born billionaires!” Later in the song his techniques get more extreme and violence more indiscriminate, as he uses his Bat-plane to patrol and gun down whoever he sees as a criminal, including a storeowner accidentally taking a single dollar from his own register. (“God’s not up here! Only Batman!”)

A commonality between these two openings is how Commissioner Jim Gordon gets portrayed. Both are hapless goofs at their core, playing more on the portrayal of the character in the 60s TV show and 90s Burton/Schumacher movies than the serious-minded character present in comics, Nolan’s Dark Knight Trilogy, and other adaptations. Lauren Lopez’s portrayal in Holy Musical gets overwhelmed by everything thrown at him, eventually giving up and getting out of B@man’s way (“I’m not gonna tell Batman what to do! He’s Batman!”) Hector Elizondo’s Gordon in Lego Batman clearly reached the “stay out of Batman’s way” point a long time ago, happy to have “the guy who flips on the Bat-signal” be his sole defining trait. While the characterizations are close, their roles do end up differing. Lopez’s Gordon sticks around to have a few more comedic scenes as the play goes on, where Elizondo’s exist to set up a contrast with his daughter Barbara and her way of approaching Batman when she becomes Police Commissioner.

These opening sequences both end in similar manners as well; the citizens of Gotham lavishing praise on their respective Batmen and a confrontation between Batman and the Joker. Praise from the citizenry in Holy Musical comes on the heels of a letter from B@man read out on the news about how much they and the city of Gotham suck. They praise B@man for his angsty nature as a “dark hero” and how they “wouldn’t want him any other way!”, establishing the motif of Gotham’s citizens in Holy Musical as stand-ins for the Batman fandom. Lego Batman uses the praise of the Gotham citizens after Batman’s victory in the opening scene as a lead in to contrast their certainty that Batman must have an exciting private life with the reality we’re shown. Which makes sense since Lego-Batman’s relationship to the people of Gotham is never presented as something at stake.

Greater contrast comes in how the confrontations with the Joker are handled, Lego Batman has an argument between the hero and villain that’s intentionally coded as relationship drama, Batman saying “There is no ‘us’” when Joker declares himself Batman’s greatest enemy. The confrontation in Holy Musical gets purposefully underplayed as an offstage encounter narrated to the audience as a Vicki Vale news report. This takes Joker off the board for the rest of the play in contrast to the Batman/Joker relationship drama that forms one of Lego Batman’s key pillars. While they take different forms, the respective citizenry praise and villain confrontation parts of these openings lead directly into the number one common thematic element between these Bat-parodies: Batman’s loneliness.

One is the Darkest, Saddest, Loneliest Number

Batman as an isolated hero forms one of the core tenants of the most popular understanding of the character. Each of these parodies picks at that beyond the broody posturing. There’s no dedicated segment in this piece about how these works’ versions of the title character function bleeds into every other aspect of them, but each starts from the idea of Batman as a man-child with trouble communicating his emotions. Time’s taken to give the audience a view of where their attitudes have left them early in the story.

Both heroes show their loneliness through interactions with their respective Alfreds. Holy Musical has the stalwart butler, played by Chris Allen, try to comfort B@man by asking if he has any friends he enjoys being around. When B@man cites Lucius Fox as a friend he calls him right away, only to discover Lucius Fox is Alfred’s true identity and Alfred Pennyworth was an elaborate ruse he came up with to protect Bruce on his father’s wishes. Ironically, finding out his closest friend was living a double life causes Bruce to push Alfred away (the play keeps referring to him as Alfred after this, so that’s what I’m going to do as well.) After he’s fired he immediately comes back in a new disguise as “O’Malley the Irish Butler” (same outfit he wore before but with a Party City Leprechaun hat.) That’s unfortunately the start of a running gag in Holy Musical that ends up at the worst joke in the play, when Alfred disguises himself as “Quon Li the Chinese Butler” doing an incredibly cringeworthy “substituting L’s for R’s” bit with his voice. It’s been my least favorite bit in the play since I first saw it in 2012 and legitimately makes me hesitate at times to recommend it. Even if it’s relatively small bit and the rest holds ups.

That disclaimer out of the way, that conversation between B@man and Alfred leads into the title hero reflecting on his sadness through the musical’s I Want Song, “Dark, Sad, Lonely Knight.” The song’s split into two halves, the first Alfred reflecting on whether he played a part in Bruce’s current condition and the second B@man longing for a connection. The song does a good job balancing between the sincerity over the hero’s sadness and getting good laughs out of it:

“Think of the children Next time you gun down the mama and papa Their only mama and papa Because they probably don’t have another mama and papa!”

The “I Want” portion of the song coming in the end with the repetition of the lryics “I want to be somebody’s buddy.”

Rather than another song number, Lego Batman covers Batman’s sadness through a pair of montages and visual humor. The first comes after the opening battle, where we see Batman taking off all his costume except for the mask hanging out alone in Wayne Manor, showing how little separation he puts between identities. Compared to Holy Musical where the equivalent scene is the first we see of Bruce without the mask on, which may come down to practicality since anyone who’s worn a mask like that knows they get hot and sweaty fast. Batman is constantly made to appear small among the giant empty rooms of his estate as he eats dinner, jams on his guitar, and watches romantic movies alone.

Ralph Fienne’s Alfred coming in at the end of this sequence witnessing Batman looking at a photo of himself as a boy with his parents for the last time. Alfred outlines Batman’s fear of being part of a family again only to be met with Batman denying he has any feelings ever. Pennyworth’s role as a surrogate father gets put into greater focus here than in Holy Musical, as we get glimpses of Alfred reading a book titled “How to Deal with Your Out-of-Control Child.” Also shown in smaller scenes of Alfred dealing with Batman’s insistent terminology for his crime fighting equipment, like calling his cowl an “armored face disguise.”

Batman’s denial of his pain contrasts how B@man wallows in it. Though he’s forced to confront it a little as the Joker’s plan ends up leaving him with no crimefighting to fall back on to ignore his issues. This montage gets set to the song “One” by Harry Nilsson and details Batman, unable to express his true feelings, eventually letting them out in the form of tempter tantrums. There’s also some humor through juxtaposition as Batman walks solemnly through the streets of Gotham City, rendered black and white, as the citizens chant “No more crime!” in celebration, while flipping over cars and firing guns into the air.

A disruption to their loneliness eventually comes in the form of a sensational character find.

Robin – The Son/BFF Wonder

Between both Bat-parodies, the two Robins’ characterizations are as close as anyone’s between them. Each is nominally Dick Grayson but are ultimately more representative of the idea of Robin as the original superhero sidekick and his influence on Batman’s life. The play and movie also both make the obvious jokes about Dick’s name and the classic Robin costume’s lack of pants at different points. Dick’s origin also gets sidestepped in each version to skip ahead to the part where he starts being an influence in Batman’s life.

Robin’s introduction to the comics in Detective Comics #38 in 1940, marking the start of Batman’s literal “Year Two” as a character, predating the introduction of Joker, Catwoman, and Alfred, among others. Making him Batman’s longest lasting ally in the character’s history. His presence and acrobatics shift the tone by adding a dash of swashbuckling to Batman’s adventures, inspired by the character’s namesake Robin Hood, though both parodies take a page out of Batman Forever and associate the name with the bird for the sake of a joke. Robin is as core to Batman as his origin, but more self-serious adaptations (i.e., the mainstream cinematic ones that were happening around the times both Holy Musical and Lego Batman came out) tend to avoid the character’s inclusion. These two works being parody, therefore anything but self-serious, give themselves permission to examine why Robin matters and how different characters react to his presence. Rejection of Robin as a character and concept comes out in some form in each of these works, from Batman himself in Lego Batman and the Gotham citizens in Holy Musical.

The chain of events that lead to Dick becoming Robin in Lego Batman are a string of consequences for Batman’s self-absorption. A scene of Bruce barely listening as Dick asks for advice on getting adopted escalating to absentmindedly signing the adoption paperwork. Batman doesn’t realize he has a son until after his sadness montage. Alfred forces Batman to start interacting with Dick against his will. The broody loner wanting nothing to do with the cheery kid, played to “golly gee gosh” perfection by Michael Cera, until he sees the utility of him. Batman doesn’t even have the idea to give Robin a costume or codename because he clearly views the sidekick’s presence as a temporary measure for breaking into Superman’s fortress, made clear by how he lists “expendable” as a quality Dick needs if he wants to go on a mission.

This makes Robin the catalyst for Batman’s shifting perspective throughout Lego Batman. When Robin succeeds in his first mission, the Dark Knight is hesitant to truly compliment him and chalks up his ward’s feats to “unbelievable obeying.” Other moments have Robin’s presence poke holes in Batman’s tough guy demeanor, like the first time Batman and Robin ride in the Bat-mobile together, Robin asks where the seatbelts are and Batman growls “Life doesn’t give you seatbelts!”, only for Batman to make a sudden stop causing Robin to hit his head on the windshield and Batman genuinely apologizes. They share more genuine moments together as the film goes, like Batman suggesting they beatbox together to keeps their spirits up after they’ve been imprisoned for breaking into Arkham Asylum. Robin’s representative of Batman gradually letting people in throughout these moments.

On the exact opposite end of the spectrum, B@man needs zero extra prompting to let Robin into his life. Nick Lang’s Robin (henceforth called “Rob!n” to keep with this arbitrary naming scheme I’ve concocted) does get brought into his life by Alfred thanks to a personal ad (“‘Dog for sale’? No… ‘Orphan for sale’! Even better!”) but it’s a short path to B@man deciding to let Dick fight alongside him. The briefest hesitance on the hero’s part, “To be Batman… is to be alone”, is quelled by Rob!n saying “We could be alone… together.” Their first scene together quickly establishing the absurd sincerity exemplified by this incarnation of the Dynamic Duo. An energy carried directly into the Act 1 closing number, “The Dynamic Duet”, a joyful ode between the heroes about how they’re “Long lost brothers who found each other” sung as they beat up supervillains (and the occasional random civilian.)

That song also ties into the contrast between the Batman/Robin dynamic and the B@man/Rob!n one. While Holy Musical is portraying a brotherly/BFF bond between the two heroes, Lego Batman leans into the surrogate son angle. While both are mainly about their stories’ Batman being able to connect with others, the son angle of Lego Batman adds an additional layer of “Batman needs to take responsibility for himself and others” and a parallel to Alfred as Batman’s own surrogate father. It also adds to the queer-coding of Batman in Lego Batman as Batman’s excuse to Robin for why he can go on missions is that Bruce and he are sharing custody, Robin even calling Batman’s dual identities “dads” before he knows the truth.

In the absence of the accepting personal responsibility through fatherhood element, the conflict Rob!n brings out in Holy Musical forms between B@man and the citizens of Gotham. “Citizens as stand-ins for fandom” is at it’s clearest here as the Act 2 opener is called “Robin Sucks!” featuring the citizens singing about how… well, you read the title. Their objections to Rob!n’s existence has nothing to do with what the young hero has done or failed to do, but come from arguments purely about the aesthetic of Rob!n fighting alongside B@man. Most blatantly shown by one of the citizens wearing a Heath Ledger Joker t-shirt saying Rob!n’s presence “ruins the gritty realism of a man who fights crime dressed as a bat.” It works as the Act 2 opener by establishing that B@man and the citizens conflicting opinions on his sidekick end up driving that half of the story, exemplified in B@man’s complete confusion about why people hate Rob!n (“Robin ruined Batman? But that’s not true… Robin make Batman happy.”)

Both Robins play into the internal conflict their respective mentors are going through, but what would a superhero story, even a parody, be without some colorful characters to provide that sweet external conflict.

Going Rogue

Both works have the threat comes from an army of villains assembled under a ringleader, Zach Galifianakis’s Joker in Lego Batman and Jeff Blim as Sweet Tooth in Holy Musical. Both lead the full ensemble of Batman’s classic (and not so classic) Rogues at different points. As mentioned before Joker starts Lego Batman with “assemble the Rogues, blow up Gotham” as his plan, while Sweet Tooth with his candy prop comedy becoming the ringleader of Gotham’s villains is a key turning point in Act 1 of the play. Part of this comes down to how their connections to their respective heroes and environments are framed, Sweet Tooth as a new player on the scene and Joker as Batman’s romantic foil.

Lego Batman demonstrates Batman and Joker are on “finishing each other’s sentences” levels of intimate that Batman refuses to acknowledge. Shown best in how Joker’s plan only works because he can predict exactly how Batman will act once he starts playing hard to get. When he surrenders the entire Rogues Gallery (without telling them) and himself to police custody, he describes it as him being “off the market.” He knows Batman won’t settle for things ending on these terms and tricks the hero into stealing Superman’s Phantom Zone projector so he can recruit a new, better team of villains for a take two of his masterplan from the start. Going through all this trouble to get Batman to say those three magic words; “I love hate you.” Joker as the significant other wanting his partner to finally reciprocate his feelings and commit works both as a play on how the Batman/Joker relationship often gets approached and an extension of the central theme. Batman is so closed off to interpersonal connections he can’t even properly hate his villains.

Sweet Tooth, while clearly being a riff Heath Ledger and Caesar Romero’s Jokers fused with a dash of Willy Wonka, doesn’t have that kind of connection with B@man. Though there are hints that B@man and his recently deceased Joker may have had one on that level. He laments “[Joker]’s in heaven with mom and dad. Making them laugh, I know it!” when recalling how the Clown Prince of Crime was the one person he enjoyed being around. This makes Joker’s death one of the key triggers to B@man reflecting on his solitude at the start of the play.

What Sweet Tooth provides the story is a threat to B@man’s new bond with Rob!n. Disrupting that connection forms the delicious center of the Candy King of Crime’s plan in Act 2. He holds Rob!n and Gotham’s people hostage and asks the citizens to decide via Facebook poll if the sidekick lives or dies (in reference to the infamous phone hotline vote from the comic book story A Death in the Family where readers could decide the Jason Todd Robin’s fate.)

With the rest of the villains under the leadership of the respective works’ main antagonists, there’s commentary on their perceived quality as threats. When Holy Musical has Superman talking to Green Lantern about how much B@man’s popularity frustrates him, he comes down especially hard on the Caped Crusader’s villains. Talking about how they all coast by on simple gimmicks with especially harsh attention given to Two Face’s being “the number two.” Saying they’re only famous because B@man screws up and they get to do more damage. Which he compares to his own relationship with his villains:

Superman: You ever heard of Mr. Mxyzptlk? Green Lantern: No. Superman: No, that’s right! That’s because I do my job!

Lego Batman has commentary on the other villains come from Joker, recognizing that even all together they can never beat Batman, because that’s how a Batman story goes. The other villains get portrayed as generally buffoonish, struggling to even build a couch together and described by Joker as “losers dressed in cosplay.” Tricking Batman into sending him to the Phantom Zone provides him the opportunity to gather villains from outside Batman’s mythos and outside DC Comics in general. Recruiting the likes of Sauron, King Kong, Daleks, Agent Smith from The Matrix, and the Wicked Witch of the West, among others. When I first saw and reviewed The Lego Batman Movie, this bugged me because it felt like a missed opportunity to feature lesser-known villains from other DC heroes’ Rogues Galleries. Now, considering the whole movie as meta-commentary on the status of this Batman as a children’s toy, it makes perfect sense that Joker would need to go outside of comics to break the rules of a typical Batman story and have a shot at winning.

The Rogues of Holy Musical get slightly more of a chance to shine, if only because their song “Rogues are We” is one of the catchier tracks from the play. They’re all still more cameo than character when all’s said and done, but Sweet Tooth entering the picture is about him recognizing their potential to operate as a unit, takeover Gotham, and kill B@man. The candy-pun flinging villain wants all of them together, no matter their perceived quality.

Sweet Tooth: “We need every villain in Gotham. Cool themes, lame themes, themes that don’t match their powers, even the villains that take their names from public domain stories.” (Two Face’s “broke ass” still being the exception.)

Both Joker and Sweet Tooth provide extensions of the shared theme of Batman dealing with the new connections in his life, especially with regards to Robin. However, Robin isn’t the only other ally (or potential ally) these Dark Knights have on their side.

Super Friends(?)

The internal crisis of these Caped Crusaders come as much from how they react to other heroic figures as it does from supervillainous machinations. In both cases how Batman views and is viewed by fellow heroes gets centered on a specific figure, Superman in Holy Musical and Commissioner Barbara Gordon (later Batgirl) in Lego Batman. Each serves a vastly different purpose in the larger picture of their stories and relationship to their respective Batmen. Superman reflecting B@man’s loneliness and Barbara symbolizing a new path forward for Batman’s hero work.

Superman’s role in Holy Musical runs more parallel to Lego Batman’s Joker than Barbara. Brian Holden’s performance as the Man of Tomorrow plays into a projected confidence covering anxiety that nobody likes him. Besting the Bat-plane in a race during B@man’s Key to the City ceremony establishes a one upmanship between the two heroes, like Joker’s description of his relationship with Batman at the end of Lego Batman’s opening battle. Though instead of that romantically coded relationship from Lego Batman, this relationship is more connected to childish jealousy. (But if you do want to read the former into Holy Musical B@man, neither hero has an onstage relationship with any woman and part of their eventual fight consist of spanking each other.)

B@man and Superman’s first real interaction is arguing over who’s the cooler hero until it degrades into yelling “Fuck you!” at each other. B@man storming off in the aftermath of that gets topped off by Superman suggesting he should get the Key to the City instead, citing his strength and longer tenure as a hero (“The first hero, by the way”) as justifications. This only results in the Gotham citizens turning on him for suggesting their city’s hero is anything less than the best, which serves both as a Sam Raimi Spider-Man reference (“You mess with one of us! You mess with all of us!”) and another example of the citizens as stand-ins for fandom. Superman’s veil of cocksureness comes off quickly after that and stays off for the rest of the play. Starting with his conversation with Green Lantern where a civilian comes across them, but barely acts like Superman’s there.

One of the play’s running gags is Superman calling B@man’s number and leaving messages, showing a desperation to reach out and connect with his fellow hero despite initial smugness. Even before the first phone call scene, we see Superman joining B@man to sing “I want to be somebody’s buddy” during “Dark, Sad, Lonely Knight” hinting at what’s to come. The note it consistently comes back to is that Superman’s jealousy stems from Batman’s popularity over him. This is a complete flip of what Lego Batman does with the glimpse at a Batman/Superman dynamic we see when Batman goes to the Superman’s fortress to steal the Phantom Zone projector. The rivalry dynamic there exists solely in Batman’s head, Lego-Superman quickly saying “I would crush you” when Batman suggests the idea of them fighting. Superman’s status among the other DC heroes is also night and day between these works. Where Lego-Superman’s only scene in the movie shows him hosting the Justice League Anniversary Party and explaining he “forgot” to invite Batman, Superman in Holy Musical consistently lies about having friends over (“All night long I’m busy partying with my friends at the Fortress… of Solitude.”)

Superman’s relationship to B@man in Holy Musical develops into larger antagonism thanks to lack of communication with B@man brushing off Supes’ invitations to hang out and fight bad guys (“Where were you for the Solomon Grundy thing? Ended up smaller than I thought, just a couple of cool guys. Me and… Solomon Grundy.”) His own loneliness gets put into stronger focus when he sees the news of Rob!n’s debut as a crimefighter, which makes him reflect on how he misses having Krypto the Super-Dog around. (The explanation for why he doesn’t have his dog anymore is one of my favorite jokes in the play and I won’t ruin it here.)

Where Superman’s a reflection of B@man’s loneliness, Rosario Dawson as Barbara in Lego Batman is a confrontation of Batman’s go it alone attitude. Her job in the story is to be the one poking holes in the foundation of Batman as an idea, starting with her speech at Jim Gordon’s retirement banquet and her instatement as commissioner. She has a by-the-book outlook on crimefighting with the omnicompetence to back it up, thanks to her training at “Harvard for Police.” Babs sees Batman’s current way of operating as ineffectual and wants him to be an official agent of the law. An idea that dumps a bucket of cold water on Batman’s crush he developed immediately upon seeing her, though that never fully goes away.

Her main point is that Batman “karate chopping poor people” hasn’t made Gotham better in his 80 years of operating. A contrast to Holy Musical’s Jim Gordon announcing that B@man has brought Gotham’s crime rates to an all-time low (“Still the highest in the world, but we’re working on it.”) She wants to see a Batman willing to work with other people. A hope dashed constantly dealing with his childish stubbornness as he tries to foil Joker’s schemes on his own, culminating in her arresting Batman and Robin for breaking into Arkham to send Joker to the Phantom Zone.

Barbara’s role as the one bringing grown-up attitudes and reality into Batman’s world does leave her in the role of comedic straight woman. Humor in her scenes comes from how she reacts to everyone else’s absurdity rather than anything she does to be funny. This works for the role she plays in Lego Batman, since she’s not there to have an arc the way Superman does in Holy Musical. She’s another catalyst for Batman’s to start letting people in as another character he grows to care about. Which starts after she lets the Dynamic Duo out of prison to fight Joker’s new army of Phantom Zone villains on the condition that he plays it by her rules. Leading to a stronger bond between Batman, Robin, Alfred, and her as they start working together.

The two Batmen’s relationships to other heroes, their villains, Robin, and their own solitude each culminate in their own way as their stories reach their conclusions.

Dark Knights & Dawning Realizations

As everything comes down to the final showdowns in these Bat-parodies, the two Caped Crusaders each confront their failures to be there for others and allow themselves to be vulnerable to someone they’ve been antagonizing throughout the story. Each climax has all of Gotham threatened by a bomb and the main villains’ plans coming to fruition only to come undone.

Holy Musical has Sweet Tooth’s kidnapping of Rob!n and forcing Gotham to choose themselves or the sidekick they hate sends B@man into his most exaggerated state in the entire play. It’s the classic superhero movie climax conundrum, duty as a hero versus personal attachment. Alfred, having revealed himself as the “other butlers”, even lampshades how these stories usually go only for that possibility to get shot down by Bruce:

Alfred: A true hero, Master Wayne, finds a way to choose both. B@man: You’re right, Alfred. I know what I have to do… Fuck Gotham, I’m saving Robin!

B@man’s selfishness effectively makes him the real villain of Holy Musical’s second act. Lego Batman has shades of that aspect as well, where Batman gets sent to the Phantom Zone by Joker for his repeated refusal to acknowledge their relationship. Where the AI running the interdimensional prison, Phyllis voiced by Ellie Kemper, confronts him with the way he’s treated Robin, Alfred, Barbara, and even Joker:

Phyllis: You’re not a traditional bad guy, but you’re not exactly a good guy either. You even abandoned your friends. Batman: No! I was trying to protect them! Phyllis: By pushing them away? Batman: Well… yeah. Phyllis: Are they really the ones you’re protecting?

Batman watches what’s happening back in Gotham and sees Robin emulate his grim and gritty tendencies to save the day in his absence makes him desperately scream, “Don’t do what I would do!” It’s the universe rubbing what a jerk he’s been in his face. He’s forced to take a look at himself and make a change. B@man’s not made to do that kind of self-reflection until after he’s defeated Sweet Tooth but failed to stop the villain’s bomb. He’s ready to give up on Gotham forever and leave with Rob!n, until his sidekick pulls up Sweet Tooth’s poll and it shows the unanimous result in favor of saving the Boy Wonder. Despite everything they said at the start of Act 2, the people want to help their hero in return for all the times he helped them. All of them calling back to the Raimi Spider-Man reference from Act 1, “You mess with one of us. You mess with all of us.”

Both heroes’ chance at redemption and self-improvement comes from opening themselves up to the people they pushed out and dismissed earlier in their stories. Batman takes on the role he reduced the Commissioner down to at the beginning of the movie and flips on signals for Barbara, Alfred, and Robin to show how he’s truly prepared to work as a team, not just with his friends and family but with the villains of Gotham the Joker pushed aside as well. Teamwork makes the dream work and they’re all able to work together to get Joker’s army back into the Phantom Zone but like in Holy Musical they fail to stop the bomb threatening Gotham. Which he can only prevent from destroying the city by confessing his true feeling to Joker

Batman: If it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t have learned how connected I am with all of these people and you. So, if you help me save Gotham, you’ll help me save us. Joker: You just said “us?” Batman: Yeah, Batman and the Joker. So, what do you say? Joker: You had me at “shut up!”

The equivalent moment from Holy Musical comes from B@man needing to put aside his pride and encourage a disheartened Superman to save Gotham for him. This happens in the aftermath of a fight the two heroes had where Superman tried to stop B@man before he faced Sweet Tooth, B@man winning out through use of kryptonite. That fight doesn’t fit into any direct parallel with Lego Batman, but it is important context for how Superman’s feeling about B@man before Superman finally gets his long-awaited phone call from the Dark Knight. Also, the song accompanying the fight, “To Be a Man”, is one of the funniest scenes in the play. What this speech from B@man does is bring the idea of Holy Musical B@man as a commentary on fandom full circle:

B@man: I forgot what it means to be a superhero. But we’re really not that different, you and me, at our heart. I mean really all superheroes are pretty much the same… Something bad happened to us once when we were young, so we dedicated our whole lives to doing a little bit of good. That’s why we got into this crazy superhero business. Not to be the most popular, or even the most powerful. Because if that were the case, hell, you’d have the rest of us put out of a job!

This speech extends into an exchange between the heroes about how superheroes are cool, not despite anything superficially silly but because of it. Bringing it back to the “Robin Sucks!” theme that started Act 2, saying “Some people think Robin is stupid. But those people are pretentious douchebags. Because, literally, the only difference between Robin and me is our costumes.” The speech culminates in what I genuinely think is one of the best Batman lines ever written, as B@man’s final plea to Superman is “Where’s that man who’s faster than a gun?” calling back to the trauma that created Batman across all versions and what he can see in someone like Superman. So, B@man sacrificing his pride and fully trusting in another hero saves Gotham, the way Batman letting Joker know what their relationship means to him did in Lego Batman.

Each of these parodies ends by delivering a Batman willing to open himself up to a new team of heroes fighting at his side, the newly minted Bat-Family in Lego Batman and the league for justice known as the Super Friends in Holy Musical. Putting them side by side like this shows how creators don’t need the resources of a Hollywood studio to make something exactly as meaningful and how the best parodies come from love of the material no matter who’s behind them.

If you like what you’ve read here, please like/reblog or share elsewhere online, follow me on Twitter (@WC_WIT), and consider throwing some support my way at either Ko-Fi.com or Patreon.com at the extension “/witswriting”

108 notes · View notes

youarejesting · 5 years

Text

Key

Genre: [♤] = Angst [♧] = Adventure/Action [♔] = Crack/Comedy [♡] = Fluff [❁] = Fantasy [♢] = Thriller/Scary [☆] = Mature themes [★] = Smut [➵] = Trigger warnings

Status: [✎] = Projects [✉] = Request [✓] = Complete [X] = Incomplete [ ] = Coming soon [∞] = On going

[Sitting in their/your lap] ☆♤♡♔

[Saying another name] ☆★♡♔

[Wearing their/your clothes] ☆♡♔

[Fidgeting] ☆★

[Getting your Period] ☆

[Crying] ♤♡♔

[Singing/rapping/dancing]

[Getting hard] ☆★

[Favorite part of you] ☆★

[Thigh Riding] ☆★

[Pregnancy Reveal] ☆★♡♔

[Perfect] ♡♔

[Walking in on them] ☆★♡♔

[Walking in on you] ☆★♡♔

[Being walked in on together] ☆★♡♔

[Significant other is CEO] ♡♔♤

First time for them ☆★♡♔

First time for you ☆★♡♔

Honeymoon night ☆★♡♔

Star Signs:

Star signs as [RunBTS] Star signs as [BTS songs] [Part 2]

[BTS Text Imagines]

[Bangtan Sonyeondan and the Purple Magic]

BTS go to Hogwarts

[BTS Birthday - One Wish] ♡♣️

[Kisaeng] ♡♣️☆♔➵✎

[Mall Santa] NJxJMxReader ♡♔✎

[Cold] ❁♤☆♢♧➵

[Lost Boys] ❁♡♤☆♢♧➵

[The Check-up] ☆➵ [A Very Bad Day] ♡♤♔✉ [Soul Food] ♡♤♔✉❁ [Jinnie] ♡♤♔❁♧ [Side Dishes] ♢❁✎ [Even the cake is in tiers] ♡♤♔❁♧

1. [Music is the spark that sets my soul on fire] ♡✉✓ 2. [Dance is the celebration of the flame] ♡✉✓ [Baby girl] ♡✉ [Bonnie and Clyde] Mafia au ♡♤☆♢♧✉ [Royal Pain] ❁♡♧✎ [SEA] ♡♤☆♧♔➵

[Feel Better] ♡♧ [Blue Side] ♤❁➵ [Steal my sunshine] ♧✎ [I wish there were more good days] ♡♤✎

[Peace] ♡✉ [Pizza] ♡✉ [The bomb] ☆♤♡♧♔♢➵ [Pandemonium] ☆♤♡❁ [Namjoon the giant and his tiny friend] ♡♤❁ [Talk is Cheap]

[Death need no invitation] ☆★♤♡❁➵ (same storyline as [Me and the ghost in number 23] but a one-shot instead of chapters) [Herb] [Herb.2]☆★♡♤♔➵ [Kitten] ☆★✉ [Beach] ☆★✉ [Wild space] ☆♡❁ [Daylight] ♡♤♔♧❁ [I Kendo it] ♡♤♔♧

[Horror movies] ♡♔ [Love Listening] [Part 2] ☆★♤♡➵ [Stars] ♡✉ [Dangerous] ♡✉ [Um...] ♡✉ [Like real people do] ♡✉❁ [Video games] ☆★✉ [Salad] ☆★✉ [Ramen] ☆★✉ [Temptation] ☆★✉ [Mad] ☆★♤♡♢➵

[I will wait (Some say)] ♤♡ [Dude] ♡✉ [Stretch] ♡✉ [Icecream] ♡✉ [Autism] ♡✉ [Lap] Mafia au ☆★♤✉ [Jealous] ♡♤✉ [Actions Speaker Louder Than Words] [Part 2] [Part 3] ♡♤✎

[WAITING FOR YOU ANPANMAN!] ♡☆♔❁♧♤

Your life may be considered a little unsavory, but you would call it dangerously cozy. When a group of crime fighting young men put your plans on hold. Over run with criminals they work to protect the innocent and stop these malicious acts of violence.

[I’m Dead] ☆★♤♡❁♔✓➵

Woken one night by memories of the past you meet a mysterious man on your balcony. He is cocky and charming and you find yourself swept up in something that is bigger than you can imagine. Why? Because he is death. And because your meeting is long overdue.

[Curse] ♡♤❁♔✓

A modern-day fairy tale whereby seven young princes born under King Bang’s greed cannot find true love. Unless they break a special spell, called the ‘Bang curse’. In order to break the curse, Prince Seokjin must be loved by a ‘Blue’ blood, by a royal. That seems almost impossible when you have a pig nose. (based off the movie Penelope)

[Wash Out] ♤♡❁♔♧✓

Taehyung and his best friend Y/N are Dolphin trainers at Wash Out; Marine Wildlife and Theme Park. When the nerdy marine biologist and resident veterinarian Doctor Kim Namjoon goes missing; the two friends form a ragtag team with Taehyung's rival Seokjin and a…. Fish?

[Midnight Circus] ☆♤♧

Traveling through the back alleys is the midnight circus. Step inside and fill your curiosity by gazing at the freaks of the night. IF YOU DARE.

[Family Secrets] ☆★♤♡♔♧

Suga is a spy who threw away his name years ago. His latest mission requires maximum stealth he must find a wife, child and house. Taehyung aka 103899V is a child who has been the subject of extensive experiments and can now read minds, and you, you are a hitman. Each of you must keep your secrets from one another. A truly one of a kind family. (inspired by ‘Spy x Family’.)

[Choices] ☆♤♡❁♔♧

Soulmate Au

[Quarantine] ☆♤♡➵✓ ( ★ in separate marked chapters)

ALERT! The city has shut down!

While you happen to be visiting the BigHit building. The government puts out an Alert across the entire Seoul area. Banning anyone from stepping outside, while they disinfect the streets. But you aren’t alone, you happen to meet the international Kpop boy group ‘Bangtan Sonyeondan’.

[Femme Ft. BigBang, TXT, NCT, BLACKPINK] ☆♡★♤♔✓

(Femme is french for female. I mean NO offense to any of my fellow LGBTQIA+ community when I use this term) The Year is 3019. Some Females (Femme) were preserved cryogenically in an effort to prevent extinction. Using Elite computer algorithms a Femme is matched with her Male applicants to find the perfect match. Male applicants are usually selected whilst in school and housed together to create trust before they are matched with their femme. It is common for a Femme to be paired with 3-5 applicants due to the shortage and the compatibility between each. But you, you have 7.

[Me and the ghost in Number 23] ☆★♤♡❁➵✓

(the same storyline as Death need no invitation just extended into chapters instead of a one-shot) Moving into your new apartment on the dance academy campus, you hear is haunted. You practice your routines with the ghoulish resident in the second bedroom. Things get heated, except you know ghosts are cold. so…

[Witching Ft. Monsta X] ☆♤❁♧✓

After your brother goes missing, you find yourself in Seoul with nothing but a prosthetic limb as the only clue to what might have happened. Circumstances lead you to a coven of seven handsome young men. But they happen to be a well-known coven that goes by the name ‘Bangtan Boys’.

[Tiny Tan - Limited Edition] ♔❁♧♡✓

It is your first time buying proper merchandise, there are new chibi figurines and the first person to order will receive a limited edition set. But what happens when BTS have gone missing without a trace and a few days later you receive your package. The box says congratulations, you open to find your limited edition figures, they look so lifelike. OH WAIT! it’s cause they are.

[Light it up] ♔❁♧♡☆✓

In Bightville there is never any nonsense, the scariest thing one might face is tripping at the roller-disco. But, when you move to the small town, crazy things start to happen. Suddenly people are going missing without any leads. It’s when your neighbour Seokjin goes missing that things get serious because now his friends suspect you!

[BTS Among Us] ♔❁♧♡♢☆♤➵✓

You have a crew of 11, well now 10. The captain has been killed. Whatever it is doesn’t appear to be human but from the evidence you gathered, whatever it is, is pretending to be one of you. Who is it and why?

[BTS 365 Prompts] ☆★♡♤♔❁♧➵✓

Seven boys. Seven days a week. 365 prompts. Find your birthday and read your special prompt. (feel free to use them.)

[MANIA] ☆★♤❁✓

At eighteen everyone takes a blood test to find out their blood types. A, B, or O. Each blood type represents the person’s secondary gender Alpha, Beta or Omega and can be Dominant (+) or Recessive (-). When small thin Yoongi receives his letter he doesn’t expect A+. He knew there was no way he was an Alpha especially not a dominant.

[Hope in the Sheets] ☆♡★♤♔➵

You held many titles: his neighbour, colleague, wingman… well, more likely a wing-woman, yet most importantly, you were his best friend. You had been friends since you were born. Between the two of you, you were younger; barely, but he never let you forget it. He always seemed to ruffle your hair and tease you, which could get rather annoying but he made up for it by treating you to things. What if a drunken one night stand between you and your best friend Hoseok leads to more complicated situations? Your reckless twenties are cut short as you find yourself suddenly responsible for something a little more.

[Sly like a... ?] ♧♔❁♡♤X (☆★ in seperate marked chapters)

Human’s strive to be better, faster and stronger looking to animal DNA. Thus Hybrids are born. As the rise for designer and Pedigree Hybrids increase, so do the failed attempts. There is one species scientists are unsuccessful in creating, but, folklore says they have been here all along, hiding and blending in with the humans for many millennia. How clever they are.

[Sparks of the Heart] ☆★♡♤♔❁

In a world where Humans live alongside humanoid computers. They can download software, use the Internet, send e-mails, or receive calls. A learning software helps mould their personality, habits, and knowledge, to make life much simpler. They must stay charged up in order to continue working properly. But there are a small few that are changing. Feeling.

[Seoul Mates] ☆♡★♤♔∞

Finding your Soulmate is one thing trying to keep them in Seoul another. The Bangtan Boys each have a different Soulmate mark. Follow their journey to discover their other half.

Story request OPEN!

[BTS Asks] ☆★♡♤♔➵∞

You ask, they answer.

[Jodo-Myeon National School of Magic] No set storyline or story format.

[Incarceration]

The world's craftiest criminals held in the most expensive and elaborate prison. What do they do to capture your attention?

2K notes · View notes

malsmanor · 3 years

Note

Care to share some of those DLP bangers with us? :)

HELL YEAH! Get ready to stand up and dance!

Since this is a blog about Phantom Manor, let’s begin with the seasonal bangers to work our way down to the rest >:D

It’s Halloween-lo-ween

I absolutely love the vocals in this... the two singers complement each other perfectly! This track almost has a techno-rock vibe going on that is reminiscent of some Parade Songs from Tokyo Disneyland and it’s so damn good. I feel like this was the moment when DLP really started to create its own unique brand of Halloween parade songs and, in general, put more effort in their seasonal events.

Are you brave enough? (Parade version)

This would be Parade song number one for me if not for the fact that the official audio has never been released, at least not to my knowledge. Which is an absolute CRIME! Because, I mean, listen to it! In this track, we find more of those synth distortion sounds from Halloween-lo-ween with the addition of that constant beat that really suits a parade with many dancers on foot.

There’s actually 2 more versions of this song (you can tell DLP knew they had a banger in their hands!) and both are amazing! The first one puts a Tower of Terror spin on it in what is possibly the best Disney Park commercial ever made while the second is part of a stage show featuring many Disney villains, primarily Ursula.

Mickey’s Halloween Celebration (Show Stop Number)

DLP’s magnum opus when it comes to seasonal music <3 a celebration of the park’s history with lovely nods to its opening days (with a throwback to the musical score of Frontierland that was broadcasted all around Europe in a TV special dedicated to the various lands of DLP) and callbacks to the sound of previous seasonal parade tracks. It also mixes in the voice talents of Paul Frees (the original Ghost Host), Vincent Price (Phantom Manor’s Phantom) and Katherine Lench Meyering (Phantom Manor’s Mélanie Ravenswood) with sick electric guitar rifts. What else do you want?!

Chante, c’est Noel!

Let’s move from Halloween to Christmas time! I am not a super fan of this song because the central portion doesn’t really do it for me... but the beat is fantastic :3 Some people prefer ‘Christmas is here’ but I always go back to Chante for my Disney Christmas fix. I wish DLP would mix English and French more often (and on equal measure, not just by having a few french lines here and there) because I really think it would make the songs much more unique. It’s a balance they never really found... maybe one day :P

Frozen 2: Enchanted Journey Parade

You don’t have to like Frozen... to appreciate electric guitar Frozen! (musicians at DLP really like their electric guitars, don’t they) Joking aside, this is actually a fantastic medley of the songs of the second movie giving ‘Vueile’ (Frozen’s best track imho) the time to shine and breathe. Also, the only parade song that warns you about the dangers of drowning, what else do you need?!

Dancin’ a catchy rhythm

The maddest banger of them all! And literally my childhood. They were so confident of the catchy-ness of this song that they even spelled it out in the title. The absolute mad lads!

Magic Everywhere 20th anniversary Parade Song

I think that your enjoyment of this song really depends on your experience with the park. I don’t think that the melody itself is anything special... but it’s an anniversary celebration song after all... and thus the lyrics are extremely sappy XD but damn, I would lie if I said it doesn’t bring a big smile to my face and maybe even some tears çWç

Just like we Dreamed it

One of my favorite parades and the perfect lyrics for those who only visit from time to time. You dream a lot about going to DLP... and when you finally get there, it’s just like you dreamed it, if not better. Maybe a bit les of a ‘bop’ than the other songs in this list, but still great.

And these are only SOME of the many awesome tracks! Don’t make me start with the music for fireworks shows!

#mal rambles #dlp #dlp music #disneyland paris #malsmanor #disneyland resort paris #disneyland paris parade #parade music #disney music #dlps mad bangers #halloween season #disneyland paris halloween #phantom manor

22 notes · View notes

penroseparticle · 3 years

Note

Would it be appropriate for me to be That Dumb Bitch™ and ask for all of the music asks? Because I know I'm gonna ask them all on Anon anyway and I really love your opinions,thoughts, and suggestions on music

Thank you so much💜 ily(platonically)

And I hope you're drinking water

ILY too anon

We both know I’m drinking Diet Cokes rather than water. But I appreciate it! And of course you can be That Dumb Bitch. I approve of all Dumb Bitches as I am one too. all 30 questions coming right up!

your favorite album opener I know it’s pretty basic to answer Arctic Monkeys is a good band, but I am pretty basic so here we are. AM is a near perfect album, which is not news to anyone, but few people know that Do I Wanna Know? is the first track on the album. Masterful.

a song starting w/ the same first letter of your first name Cheat, by Emily Burns. It’s just a quiet, competent, earworm. And it’s a pretty nice message too- if it were me I wouldn’t have cheated, end of. I like it.

a song outside of your usual genre I’m not super into Metal. That’s not to say that I don’t enjoy it, my brother pretty much exclusively listens to hard rock and metal and such, so I have some stuff I like. But it’s just one of those genres someone has to introduce me to songs in. That said, I really like Cold Water by Protest The Hero. Good stuff!

a song that reminds you of your favorite season Almost Lover by A Fine Frenzy is SUCH a Fall song, I swear.

a song from a lifelong favorite artist I think my lifelong favorite artist is Ms. Lauryn Hill, if we’re going by the artists I’ve loved longest- that’s obviously influenced by my mother, who LOVES Jill Scott, Lauryn Hill, etc. I’m going with a Fugees song, not an independent, but it’s still fantastic- the classic “Killing Me Softly With His Song”.

your current “on repeat” song Montero by Lil Nas X is still on repeat and I’m not ashamed.

a song your friend introduced you to that you ended up loving Shout out Anna for introducing me ti Leikeli47! Girl Blunt was the song and now I just love her in general but Girl Blunt is good. I think my fave is Wash and Set though, so have a freebie on me.

a song that speaks the words you couldn’t say I have a hard time asking for things for myself so Rose’s Turn has always been a song I think but don’t say out loud. Starting now it’s gonna be my turn? Too unrealistic tbh.

a song that captures your aesthetic (can be ideal!) Bambi by Hippo Campus

a song about the place where you live I have played Welcome to DC so many fucking times (By Mambo Sauce because this city is a fucking joke) and I am thoroughly sick of it. When youth hockey teams use a song as their warmup song it gets old REAL fast.

a song from an international artist I LOOOOVE Maluma, sorry not sorry, and El Perdedor is one of my favorite songs of all time tbh.

a song you can scream all the words to Love In The Morning by Chris Jobe. I just really enjoy the song idk why. Also it’s a very simple song and it’s easy to sing.

a reboot of a song/songs you already loved (remix, mashup, acoustic, etc.) I love Passionfruit, but Drake is a... problematic artist to enjoy nowadays. Yaeji did a very slow, lilting, quiet cover of it that I quite like. So now for my Passionfruit fix I support a small artist and not, you know, Drake

a song with the name of a place in the title Oh god. Vienna is literally the name of like 4 songs that I love (The Fray, Billy Joel, Lambert, and Ultravox, so I’ve gotta go with that one tbh. Lambert is instrumental and Ultravox is some chill ass 80′s stuff, and everyone knows the Billy Joel one.

a song that reminds you of traveling Feel It Still by Portugal the Man reminds me of a trip I took to NYC because someone I went with loved the band.

your favorite childhood song My favorite childhood song is What Kind of Pokemon Are You? From the 2.B.A. Master album for pokemon. It is my fave because that cd is the first piece of music I ever bought for myself.

a song that reminds you of a good time Midnight by Caravan Palace. I have seen Caravan Palace three times live, more than anyone but Betty Who, and I ALWAYS have a fantastic time at their concerts. Just. So good.

a song that reminds you of a bad time Season 2 Episode 3 by Glass Animals is how I describe depression to people- it’s not just that I’m like, blank or sad or bland. It’s that I go through the motions and it doesn’t feel like anything. I do things I love and it feels like nothing. You kind of just can’t do anything to get out of it, your stuff just stops working.

a song from an artist whose old music you enjoy more than their new music So it turns out that my favorite album by FAR for OkGo is Of The Blue Color Of The Sky, a fairly old album of theirs. I like most of thier stuff and obviously all of their videos are great, but my favorite song of theirs is from this album- Needing/Getting.

a song that empowers you I like other Lady Gaga songs more but Donatella makes me feel like I can punch through Concrete idk why

a song from a local artist DID YOU KNOW GINUWINE IS FROM DC. ANYWAYS STREAM PONY

a song you related to in the past and present, but for different reasons Let’s Dance To Joy Division by The Wombats is a song I’ve always related to. Back in the day it was just loud and fun and very good, and now I really think the message of “Everything sucks but we’re gonna celebrate what we can” is something I try to absorb as much as possible now.

your favorite cheesy pop song Classic by MKTO is an objectively bad song that I constantly have in my Spotify Wrapped. I legit can’t explain it. Is it good? no. Is it original? Also no. Is it interesting? No! I don’t get it but I’m under the spell

a song from a soundtrack (musical, movie, video game, etc.) A PROMISE FROM FIRE EMBLEM: THREE HOUSES WAS MY NUMBER THREE SONG ON MY SPOTIFY WRAPPED LAST YEAR SORRY MOM SORRY GOD

the song currently stuck in your head OR the song you are listening to right now My music is on shuffle but it just hit Hot Girl Bummer by Blackbear

a song that taught you a lesson Which to Bury, Us Or The Hatchet by Reliant K is one of my favorite songs and really is an object lesson in letting things go. What’s more important? The person or the problem? And sometimes it’s the person, so you bury the hatchet, and sometimes it’s the problem, and you bury us (the relationship). It’s a good song imo.

an instrumental song Teleblister by Clever Girl

a song you always skipped, but ended up loving once you listened to it My favorite song from The Blessed Unrest by Sara Bareilles is Cassiopeia and I straight up skipped it every time I listened for the first like, 6 months I listened to the album.

your favorite album closer good kid, m.A.A.d city is a perfect album as well, and Compton is the last song on the album. Perfection.

your all-time favorite song Such a hard question, and not always easy to answer to be honest. It fluctuates. But for me I think my all time favorite song is currently

6 notes · View notes

be-ready-when-i-say-go · 4 years

Text

Missin’ You is Terrible- Part 2: Thinkin’ ‘Bout You

Calum isn’t looking for deep feelings, just for some fun. But he’s pretty sure friends with benefits isn’t supposed to go like this. Black!Female Reader.

Enjoy my masterlist

Support me on kofi

_________________________

Get ready to miss me.

Her handwriting is sloppy, but still readable. Calum finds the note tucked into his journal. It rests right on top of an envelope. How in the world he managed to miss that this morning when he was packing his bad, he’s not sure. Calum picks up the white paper. Something slides from one end of the envelope to the next. It’s small and rectangular. What in the world? he thinks to himself. He parts the folds and sees something baby blue, a piece of paper--a note. And a small black flashdrive. His breath catches in his throat.

It’s not what he thinks. No, she didn’t. She wouldn’t do that. With a slight shake in his fingers, Calum pulls out the note. For Private Eyes-- is all that’s written in all caps. He scans the note again before noting a tiny arrow underneath the ‘S’. He follows it all the way down and sees in much tinier handwriting, They are watching you.

He chuckles. Of course, of fucking course, she’d make a reference to the song in such a serious moment. Was serious even the right word to use here? He isn’t sure, but his heart beat is so rapid he can feel it thumping beneath his skin. Swallow hard, Calum plays with the flashdrive, lets his ears and brain drift down the soundwaves of David Bowie, armpits sweating about what’s on this black drive. He cannot wait for this flight to end.

When his phone chimes mid afternoon the next day, he’s in the middle of signing posters. The second his plane landed, he managed to grab a couple hours of sleep before being rushed off to the venue. The show that night was great and the guys got up to their usual shenanigans. By the time he had a moment to himself, all he wanted to do was crash. Now he sits, working through the stack of posters in front of him. Calum scribbles his signature across the poster before capping the marker. New iMessage- A-1. Throwing a glance over his shoulders, he unlocks the message. Tell me you’ve stolen a moment alone to check what’s on that flashdrive.

Calum’s hands start to tremble. He doesn’t even want to think about what’s on that USB. He can’t even fathom what sorts of alluring and drool inducing concoctions she’s uploaded up there. He stands from the floor, a soft grunt falling off his lips. His lower back and shoulders have been killing him the last day and a half, and he knows it’s because of his visit to her. He can’t sleep hardly at night anymore. His body is dead beat tired, but his brain keeps drifting to the smell of her bonnet in his nose, to the feel of her curled up into his side. He misses her more than he usually does.

But right now, at the mention of that fucking drive hooked to his keys, his desire just have her close is replaced with a desire to devour her, to make her see stars, to utterly destroy her for making him like this. To give her a taste of her own medicine. The ringing hits his ear as he pulls the phone closer. The hallways to the venue seem to be bustling. They had soundcheck already, but it seemed like people and crew were always doing something, always on some sort of task. “You could’ve just texted me,” she laughs answering the phone call.

Calum exhales, nearly caving at the sound of her voice. But no, he’s going to give her a taste of her own medicine. She’s always the one pulling his strings, always the one to make him into putty. She’s going to have to suffer. “Patience, babycakes. Didn’t anyone ever teach you that it’s a virtue?”

Her exhale is shaky, crackling through the phone. “That’s quite cruel. I put so much hard work into that surprise for you,” her voice lowers to a whiny whisper. “Months. So many pictures. Videos,” she draws out the word. “All your favorite sets. Know how long it took me to find a baby blue set?”

“Stop,” Calum breathes. He doesn’t want to beg. He can feel the whine trying to claw its way over his throat. He can’t. She can’t win this time.

“You’re strong when you want to be,” she offers, voice returning to its normal volume and tone. “But only when you want to be,” she adds under her breathe.

He hears. She knows he did. Calum straightens against the cold concrete wall. “Babycakes, you’re going to regret that.” He’s going to make sure of it. They have two more shows before the North American leg ends. He’ll sweat her out for those two days. “You’re not allowed to touch yourself until I say so.”

“Who died and made you king?”

“Let me spell it out. I have two more shows before this leg ends. How long is the drive to my place from yours? Wouldn’t you like to see Duke? Spend a couple days with me, say hi to the boys?” Calum’s purposefully neglecting details, purposefully not mentioning sex. This is her reality if she misbehaves, if she doesn’t heed his words. But that sounds heavenly as he describes it. Does it sounds just as appealing to her as it does to him? He prayed it did. Part of him wanted her to misbehave. Wanted her to crack as some kind of twisted test to see if listened to his confession.

It seemed like she did. She got teary-eyed and he held her. Just held her, soothing her with soft murmurs and kisses to her forehead. He didn’t know what to say. Was there anything to say at that point? He wasn’t sure, and isn’t sure even now. She never said anything. How could he respond if she never spoke to him verbally. But then again she was never one for words. She spoke in actions. Like the next morning, she made him his favorite pancakes and she surprised him with muffins from a local bakery. Would she speak with actions again this time? Would she show him where she stood this time around?

“I’ll play this game,” she answers, consenting to the rules. They play these games. They make these rules, but rarely. Calum smiles at the phrase. “But when at the end of this, after I’ve obeyed like a good girl, can you do something for me?”

“What do you propose?”

“You’ll know when I ask for it.”

Calum drops his head to the wall, not hard enough to hurt him. He has to fight every once of him to fight the fucking groan trying to burst through his chest. She’s devious. She could ask for anything. She could ask to Dom. She could ask him to jump off a bridge and Calum would have to agree if he says yes now. He highly doubted she would ask him to do such a thing. But agree without specifics was a hairy situation to be in. But she needs a reward, something to look forward to that’s just for her at the end of this. Her obeying his rule, her being a good girl is for him, so he can watch her crack and melt to the smallest of his touches. He loves it. But she needs something on the other end of the deal that satisfies her Dom side, something that gives her an upper hand, even if it’s just temporary.

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Calum nods. “I’ll play this game,” he says, pushing out all his breathe.

“Thank you, angel.” Calum can see the sly grin on her face, he can feel her nails ghosting over his skin. The thought makes his body shiver. A groan slips over his lips. “Oh, you’re not going to regret it. Well not that much.”

Oh, she’s not getting to him right now. She’s not pulling this sleight of hands right now. Calum pushes off the wall. “You only get your favor at the end. Don’t get too cocky now.” With that he ends the call. No goodbye, doesn’t let her get something slick in. The more opportunities she has to say something smart, to say something capable of cracking him, the more likely he is to crumble in this resolve. He drops his head back against the wall, exhaling deeply.

Someone chuckles next to him. He looks to see Ashton and Michael, sticking their heads out of the door. “Looks like someone had a pretty fun phone call,” Michael laughs.

Calum doesn’t even need to look down to his pants to know what they’re referring to. In defense, Calum flips them off. Ashton speaks, “That Nobody is truly Somebody huh?”

Calum wants to tell them to fuck off, that it’s none of their business. But his neck is a mess of red bruises still. She worked a number on him the afternoon before he had to leave. Not that he minds, but the jokes keep coming.

“That Nobody is probably a vampire. It’s a miracle that he’s still alive,” Michael states.

“Alright, get a new joke,” Calum retorts. “You’ve used that one enough.”

“Did she call to see if you had restocked? Which by the looks of it, you’ve got plenty of blood to spare,” Michael says.

This one gets Calum, his laughter bursts out of him. “Fuck off,” he chuckles out, walking back into the room. There’s no hiding it, there’s no need to even try. Calum walks back into the dressing room, knowing full well everyone that looks at him can take a guess as to who he was just talking to. No one questions it. Calum knows he ought to be more shameful, more reserved about this. But he’ll give her this. The quiet recognition that there is a somebody even if they never speak her name. He can give her that, and she never has to know.

__ Calum slides into his bunk that night, exhausted. But he figures before he slips into unconsciousness, he’ll finally take a quick look through her little gift. Calum pulls out his laptop and fishes out the USB. Slotting it into the port, Calum’s heart races. If he was dead tired before, now he’s wide awake. The small icon pops up, the title of the seems innocent enough. He clicks on it and there’s two compressed ZIP files. He clicks on one of it and a small text box pops up, asking for a password. What does he need a password for? She never game him one.

But he remembers the note. He tries ‘forprivateeyes’ and that doesn’t work. Calum thinks for a second ‘privateeyes’. That doesn’t work. What else was on that note then? Calum reaches into back into his bag and pulls the envelope out. Down in that corner in the smaller handwriting. Calum types into the box, ‘theyarewatchingyou’. The box disappears and suddenly his computer screen is filled with tiny icons. The rich depth of her skin in each one of them. His fingers tremble as he clicks on one at random. The photo that lights up his screen is just of her, sitting in her fluffy grey moon chair. She appears to be bare beneath the white sheet. She gaze is direct to the camera, or maybe it’s a mirror. Probably a mirror, he guesses. She did a rod set, he can tell by the way the curls do more a shirley temple curl than the zig zag pattern of her natural curl pattern. Her head titled just a little, lips glossy, pouty and parted.

Calum’s inhale is shaky. Holy fuck, holy fucking shit. He closes that one and clicks on another one, a little further down. Calum bites his lips as the picture loads, her a playboy bunny bodysuit. His body is tingling and hot. God, fuck. It did take her months to do all of this. Fuck, holy fuc. Scrambling he finds his phone buried under the blanket of the bunk. He doesn’t even know if she’s up at this hour. But he still tries. He has to see if she’s awake. So she can see what the fuck she’s doing to him. He keeps the volume down low, resting the phone against the screen of laptop. He clicks on another photo. This one is a video. She’s at her desk in her office, lazily sucking on a lollipop. Cherry he figures from the color of the candy. She gives a clear view of the tip of her tongue circling the body of the candy. “Fuck you,” he whispers.

“But you’re so far away.”

Calum looks down to the phone. She’s sleepily grinning into the camera. Shit. He didn’t mean to interrupt her sleep. “Did I wake you? I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” she murmurs. “You called for a reason.”

“I finally looked at what’s on that drive. You know you’re such a good girl, right? But so bad at the same time.”

“It’s my speciality, huh?”

Calum looks back to the screen, she’s pulling the candy from hollowed cheeks. He can hear the lewd pop sound, the slurping follows soon after. Fuck, that does not sound good. He hurriedly turns down the volume, heart thundering, blood pounding in his ears. “You have headphones for a reason!” Luke shouts with a laugh.

She chuckles. “Wear headphones for all videos in the future.”

Calum sighs. “Thanks for the warning. Now, after the fact.”

She hum, shifting before her face is completely illuminated in the dark of her room by her phone screen. “See, now’s about the time I’d be touching myself. But somebody’s decided to be an asshole.”

A grin lifts Calum’s cheeks. “Be good for him, babycakes. Sleep well.”

“Wait, you’re not just going--” Her sentence dies on her lips. Because he is. He is going to toy with her. “That’s not the only reason why you called. Not just to tell me that you looked.”

“Sweet dreams,” he says.

A whine falls from her lips. “You’re gonna leave me high and I can’t say necessarily dry, but, just gonna leave me hanging?”

“I surely am,” Calum smiles, waves into the camera. The call ends, the distinct two beep sound signaling it.

The next day, the bus empties, leaving Calum alone for just a spare few minutes. So he pulls out his laptop, sliding the USB into the port again. He calls her again on FaceTime. It takes her longer to answer this time. When the call finally connects, Calum smiles, fingers typing in the password. “Have you been good?”

“No.” The word is so definite. She doesn’t make an excuse, she doesn’t hesitate with the word. But he catches the huff at the end of it. It’s not a pouty huff, it’s a breathless huff. He snaps his attention to his phone. Her chest is heaving, but she grins lazily into the camera.

“Are you--Why?” Calum can’t even get the words out to fully flesh out his disbelief. So blatant, like with no shame. He should be furious, he’s trying to tell myself to be. But it’s not working. All that’s flooding him is desire, it starts in his lower gut, spreading to his chest. His body floods with warmth. A moan falls over her lips, eyes fluttering close. “Show me. Show me how much of a fucking bad girl you’re being,” he whispers.

The screen shifts. She’s using her laptop, he realizes as the full view of her body comes into view. She situations the laptop between her legs. He watches the point in which her fingers disappear inside of her. He can see the pillows lifting her lower back and hips. She’s at home. She must be writing today. “So you couldn’t wait?” Calum questions, gaze zeroed in on slickness glistening in the reflection of the screen.

“Hmm, I’m sorry. I couldn’t wait.”

“Clearly, you’re not sorry enough to stop.”

“I couldn’t stop thinking about you jacking off to those photos,” she sighs, squeezing one of her breasts. “I couldn’t stop thinking about the sounds you make, the way you pull your bottom lip between your teeth. Then I really wanted your fingers inside me. Then I-fuck,” she hisses. Her hips start to rise, heels dig into the mattress. Her fingers have sped up.

“Stop. You fucking stop right now, or so help me God.” He doesn’t even recognize his own voice. The amount of authority that spills past his lips makes him scared.

Her fingers immediately stop, she doesn’t remove them. Just stops, like she was told. “I’m sorry. I-,” she tangles her free hand around the roots of her hair.

“Tell me why. Why disobey and break the rules. I even gave you a reward at the end.”

It’s silent. She turns her attention to him. She’s assessing him. She’s trying to find the right words. She can write her ass off, she can create beautiful words. But in person, she flails. Calum doesn’t want to have to guess her motives. He wants the fucking truth. He creates an incentive. “I’ll let you cum if you’re honest.”

“I know I wasn’t supposed to touch myself. I know I consented to the rules. But what if instead of seeing you just for sex, I really wanted to just say hi to Duke, and see the other guys, and bake and too late or too fucking early in the morning with you like we used to do. What if I said I was breaking the rules because sex matters much less to me when it comes to me?”

“Well, are you saying it? Why fill that flashdrive?”

“I am saying it. I’m saying that. Why fill the flashdrive? Because I’m always thinkin’ ‘bout you. Literal months spent putting that together. Because literally you consume every thought that’s not about work or writing. Sue me. Fucking sue me for being a human being with fucking feelings. Sue me for trying to suggest that maybe just maybe I might want something more.”

His breath catches in his throat. He doesn’t do relationships. They never work for him. It requires too much trust. The last time he thought he could trust someone it blew up in his face and went viral--not in the way he wanted either. He was a kid, it was an honest mistake. But still when things cut deep, they leave scars. His first reaction is to say things would never work. His first reaction is to fucking run. But hasn’t he already kind of opened this door? Is he actually falling for her? Is this just more than sex? Was it ever really just about sex?

“Well, are you going to say anything?”

Calum wasn’t even aware of how long his silence had stretched. “I’m a man of my word. You can cum. Be a good girl for me.”

“I know I’m naked right now. But we are passed this game. We are passed a tug of war in who’s Dom right now,” she sighs, pushing the laptop away from her. She disappears from view, but still talks. “I know we’re shit with words and verbally expressing ourselves. But I’d greatly appreciate you opening your fucking mouth for once.”

The door to the bus opens. His security guard waves at him. “C’mon, Cal.”

Shit, of course. Now when he doesn’t need to be interrupted. Her sigh is heavy from the other side of the screen. “Go, I understand.”

Calum exits the folder, ejecting the flashdrive. “I’ll call you back,” he says. “Okay? Give me just a minute to get into the venue and then I’m calling right back.”

“Okay.” It’s not a convincing tone. She’s defeated. Her lips are twisted, her eyes look glassy. Fuck, damn it.

“I swear. I’ll call the second I’m inside.” All she does is sigh and nod before ending the call. Calum rushes to collect his things, throwing them into his bag. He follows behind the guard, phone still unlocked on her contact name. The second the fans see him, the screams start. He waves. He doesn’t even attempt to smile. The moment his feet touch the inside of the venue his taps on her number again. The call rings once, then twice, three times. She’s not going to answer. Calum bites down on his thumb nail, listening to the ringing. He doesn’t leave a message.

He calls again a couple hours later, after sound check. Still no answer. She responds to that missed call with a text. Sorry, got an email about a bumped up deadline.

Calum types a reply. Okay. Good luck. Let me know you’re done so we can talk. Please.

She sends back a thumbs up emoji. Calum drops the phone into his lap, rubbing his closed eyes with the heel of his palms. She always responds with a text, a phrase, even if it’s just ‘K’. There’s always some sort of text, never just an emoji. He could cry. Honestly, he might be. There’s that all too distinct sting behind his eyes. Yes, definitely teas. It’s not that he wants to reject his feelings. He’s just frustrated. He can’t believe that he was an idiot. Why didn’t he say anything about his feelings? Why did he think that he could respond like that? “Fuck,” he exclaims.

The entire room jolts at the exclamation. Michael puts his phone down, watching his friend rub his face. Ashton walks over, perching onto the edge of the sofa. “I’m such an fucking idiot,” Calum mutters.

“What’s up, man?” Ashton asks.

Calum shakes his head, finally opening his eyes. He peers up to Ashton, the anguish painting his face. Ashton knows, gives a squeeze to Calum’s shoulder. “I’m a fucking idiot.”

“You said that already.”

“I just really fucked up. And I can’t tell if she’s blowing me off, or she’s actually busy now and can’t talk. She’s never responded to a message with just an emoji. Never, ever.”

“Give her the rest of the day. See if she responds with something else.” Calum nods. Maybe she just needs time.

The entire show, Calum’s too focused on if she’s called, if she’s left a message. She knows he’d be on stage at this point. If she really wanted to talk, she wouldn’t call when he couldn’t answer. He misses a note and nearly wants to kick his own ass. Just stop thinking about her for thirty seconds, he reprimands. When the show ends, Calum hates himself. He played terrible. He managed towards the end of the show to put aside his thoughts for the most part. But by that point, it feels too late to correct it, to make it better.

He stands from his final bow, steps backwards and immediately thinks about drowning his anger in a pint. Or two, maybe more. His phone is empty of messages from her. Not a text or a call. He figured as such. As the night nears morning, there’s still nothing from her. Calum curls up in his bunk, clutching his phone. He doesn’t care if her call comes at 7 in the morning. It won’t matter what time as long as it comes.

To see Duke is just the distraction that Calum needs. She still hasn’t called. It’s only been a day and a half. He’d be less concerned, if not for the fact of his fucking idiotic mistake. He hasn’t called since his text, he’s afraid to interrupting her. But now it’s eating him alive. He reclines in his outdoor seating, rubbing Duke’s stomach. “Should I call her bub?” he asks the small dog.

Duke turns his head to Calum. He doesn’t say anything, just pants a little happy to have Calum back. Calum unlocks his phone and hovers over her name. He should call her. Even if she doesn’t answer, he’ll leave a voicemail. He’ll apologize. There’s a chance she doesn’t listen right away. But he has to do something. He taps it and presses the phone icon. Bringing the phone to his ear, he listens to the ringing, heart pounding against his ribs. It rings for a fourth time and he’s about to give up when the call connects. “So, I’m still on deadline and I’m still pretty pissed. But I figured I should finally answer,” she says.

“I’m sorry. I should’ve actually responded to your confession. I should’ve said literally anything other than what I did. I’m so so sorry.”

“Could’ve said that in a text.”

“Would you even have read it?”

She chuckles. “Probably not right away.”

“How much more do you have to do? What’s the new deadline? I want to have a proper conversation but I don’t want to intrude on your time.”

“Tonight. I still have a fourth of this chapter and then three more. I haven’t slept more than four, five hours total. I’m running on pure caffeine, right now.” Her sigh is heavy through the phone.

“Get some rest, okay? I’ll call tomorrow morning.”

“I’m still mad at you,” her voice is soft.

“You could curse me out. But I’m going to talk to you. I’m going to apologize properly, again.”

“I’ll answer,” she whispers. Calum ends the call, biting his lip. This is good. She answered. As Calum watches out, taking in the lush grass, recording cute clips of Duke, he starts planning how early to get up. He’s got more than one way to apologize to her.

“How can I help you?” the young girl says from behind the glassy display case.

Calum eyes the donuts, but also keeps an eye on Duke. He sits quietly, watching all the other patrons of the bakery. “Half a dozen variety pack. Though I might be back later,” he chuckles, thinking how much she loves this family owned donut shop.

The girl nods, grabbing the box and lining it with a wax sheet. “It’s a blessing and a curse to work here,” she jokes. “I highly suggest the lemon filled.”

“Throw two of those in there, yeah. Two red velvets.” Those are her favorite. He cannot show up to her door without those in the pink box. He pauses, looking over the rest of the options. “And two classic glazed too.”

“Great choices.”

It’s about ten when he knocks on her door. If it weren’t for the donuts in his passenger seat, Calum is sure that it would’ve taken him nearly an extra hour to knock. He said call, not roll up at her door with donuts. But he did also have Duke, so maybe that would make up for it as well. Just as he drops his hand, the door opens. He expected her to roll out of bed, drag herself to the front door. But no, she’s in athletic shorts and an one of his t-shirts tucked into them. It’s his Drop Dead one, the ones with holes in it. Her hair picked out in a fro around her head. She’s even got lipgloss on. Fuck. He wonders for a moment if it’s the one that’s slightly scented like vanilla.

“I thought you said you were going to call,” she chuckles, holding the door open with her body.

Calum shrugs. “So maybe I’m bad about my word sometimes.” He lifts the box of donuts. “But I brought breakfast, or maybe a mid-morning snack. It looks like you’ve been up for a while.”

She waves him inside, crouching to pick up Duke, who happily climbs into her arms. She giggles. “Yes, it’s scented lip gloss Duke. No, you can’t have any. I’m so sorry bud.” Calum places the box onto her dining room table. He spies the Swiffer mop and knows she was in the middle of cleaning, so slides out of his shoes, putting them on the guest shoe rack.He stands for a moment. Can he act like he normally does? Go straight in for a donut and kick his feet up on the coffee table? No, he should probably talk to her first.

“I’m going to chop your head off. Relax.”

Calum plays at the rings on his fingers. He’s not really sure why he put them on. Well, no, that’s a lie. He knows why he put them on, because he knows how much she loves them. He wanted to show he was thinking about her too. Another reason why he got the donuts too. Calum nods, looking to the ground for a second. “So, if I say I’m a fucking idiot and I’m very sorry again is it overkill?”

She slips the harness off Duke, shaking her head. “No. It’s not overkill. Some might call it just a kill. I’m sorry for ghosting. I should’ve called or something.” She slumps in front of her couch, put Duke up on the couch cushions. Calum grabs the box of donuts and some napkins. He settles down directly across from her in front of the coffee table. She flips the lip, grabbing a red velvet with her fingers.

“You’re disgusting,” Calum teases.

“You’ve kissed me with your own cum in my mouth. Let’s not talk about gross right now.”

He rolls his eyes, though he shifts a little. “We’re not talking about that right now.” But there’s a lot more they’re also not talking about either. Like, is Calum ready to jump into the deep end. Is he truly gonna let himself call this love? Is he going to call this a desire to be with someone that’s not strictly sexual? Is he going to actually “do” feelings right now? But fuck, does he like pondering the universe with her. He likes watching her play with Duke, he’s got too many videos of them curled up together on his phone.

“It’s been hard to sleep at night,” Calum utters. She pauses, part of her bite still hanging out of her mouth. “Without you,” he continues. “Like, I either don’t sleep peacefully at all. Or I sleep in this really tight ball and I wake up with sore muscles. There’s something about the floral scent to your hair products, something about your body heat next to me. And like, pondering the universe alone fucking sucks. I much rather hear you debate me on every sentence than have my brain loop the same paranoid thought a thousand times. And I’ve very unfortunately forgotten your family recipe to snickerdoodle cookies and I’m sad about that because they’re the greatest cookies ever. And what I’m really trying to say is that I have feelings for you. And not just the ‘I-want-to-fuck-her-senseless’ kind. It’s more of the ‘I-want-to-watch-her-edit-at-the-kitchen-table-massage-her-shoulders-and-then-fuck-her-senseless-on-it’ feelings’ kind of feelings. And I’m so sorry I didn’t say that before. I-- me and verbal communication aren’t the best of friends.”

She nods. “I know that much. We aren’t great friends either. I guess my question is, do we want to act on those feelings? Like I know I’d like to, but Mr. Doesn’t Do Relationships across from me might say otherwise.”

“I do. I want to act on these feelings. I’m not promising that I’m going to the best. I’m not promising that I’m such knight in shining armor. But I am promising to try. It’s honestly all I’ve got.”

Licking some of the icing from her fingers, she taps against the wooden structure beneath her fingers. “So, like, what now?” she laughs.

Calum shrugs with chuckle. “The hell if I know.”

“I gotta finish mopping the kitchen, so I’m going to go do that and then we can figure out what the hell happens from here.” Calum nods, watching her push up from the floor. As she passes, he reaches out for her, fingers brushing over her calves. She nudges his leg with her foot. He over dramatizes the effect and falls back onto the hardwood flooring.

Her chuckle is soft, “Idiot. It wasn’t even that hard.” Before she can walk away, Calum grabs onto her ankle. He know she has responsibility. But the kitchen floor isn’t going to up and run. “Yes, Calum?”

“Are you still mad at me?”

“No, you fucking bought me red velvet donuts. I’d be a fool to still be mad at you.”

“Does that then mean that I can get a kiss?”

She watches the way his lips quirk into a smirk. He’s going to ask for a lot more. He says kiss, but she second squats down to peck his lips, his hands are going to find her hips. If his hands find her hips, they’ll find her waist. Then her breast, her throat, every inch of her skin. “Just a kiss,” she warns.

The warning falls on deaf ears. As she lowers down, Calum catches her waist, pulling her in close. Don’t swing your legs over his waist, she warns herself. That’s the deadly move, that’s the nail in her coffin. As their lips pull apart, Calum gives another tug. Her knee hits his side. “I gotta mop,” she defends. Yes, mop. That’s going to spare her just minutes.

“It can wait. I’m thinking about that playboy bunny suit right now and I really hope your coffee table is sturdy.”

She straddles him, holding his face gently in her hands.This is it, she’s completely lost any ounce of being in her right mind. He smells so much like Gain, stale cigarettes and coffee. He smells like home to her. She doesn’t give a fuck about that kitchen floor now. “Coffee table’s too short.” They gaze at each other. Dark brown melting into each other. He reaches up and brushes over her face with the back of his knuckles. She’s real, and his. Fuck, the phrase feels strange in his mind. Would it sound just as strange? Would it feel awkward leaving hips?

“You’re like, actually mine,” he whispers, his lips lift into a smile. No, it’s definitely not awkward. It feels right. But still strange, still not firmly in his grasp.

“I’m yours,” she laughs, kissing him. His fingers dig into her side. She’s soft beneath his fingers, she’s warm, she’s his. Her hips grind down on his crotch, covered thinly in the mesh of his basketball shorts. He groans into her mouth. She tastes differently now, he thinks, even behind the sweetness of her donut. She still tastes, smells like what he always knew, but it feels new on his tongue, in his nose. It feels news and exciting somehow.

Calum slips his hands under the cotton of her, his, t-shirt and she moans into his mouth. The rings probably cold to her. Balling the cotton into his fist he pulls up. She breaks their kiss, pulling the shirt completely off her body. A lacy black bralette covers her brown chest. He runs the pads of his fingers over her skin, dancing them over the swell off her breasts. She drops her head back, pressing hard down into his crotch again. “Hmm,” she whines.

“I know you call me an angel. But right now, you’re the one god sent,” he whispers to her, squeezing her breast beneath the thin material. He drags his second hand down her stomach, pressing his palm deep into her flesh.

Her head falls forward, a smile resting on her face. She crawls her nails up his skin, trailing up his ribs beneath the black hoodie adorning his body. She pushes the material up, exposing his skin to the cool air. Her lips are soft as the barely touch his body. “Ah,” he groans, tensing at the small bites she trails up his skin. She pushes until the hoodie is up and over his head. Calum sits up, pulling them chest to chest.

She rests her head onto his shoulder as his fingers run down her spine, playing at the hooks. Her cheek is so close to his silver fern. His reminder of a home he’s never been. She wants to take them there. She wants to watch his face light up when he lands and gets to spend proper time with his family. Not rushed backstage, not told at the holidays. But proper time. She kisses the tattoo softly several times. Calum tilts his head a little, letting her take her time with his body. “I’m gonna take you home of these days,” she whispers in his ear, gently nibbling at his ear.

He chuckles. “It’s two hours without bad traffic.”

“No,” she presses a hand to the tattoo. “I’m going to take you home. Here,” she says tapping the black ink.

“I am in a home,” he returns. “Right here with you in my arms.”

“A home, but not home. I know Sydney will always be your home, the place you’ll ultimately go back to. But, roots, I want to take you to your roots.”

He can’t say no to that. He’s always wanted to go. He’s just never allowed himself to dream it a possibility. He always has something else to do. He’s always putting something else in front of it. He can’t put something else in front of her though. She’s going to be his reason to finally think of himself. “Okay, Ms. Big Shot. Sweep me off my fucking feet.”

She kisses him, laughter still bubbling from her lips. “I’m not that strong. But I’ll surely try.”

Calum undoes the hooks to her bralette, staring directly into her eyes as he pushes the lace away from her skin. “A small wise old alien once said, ‘Do or do not. There is no try.’”

She slaps his chest. “Do not quote Yoda to me with your dick hard.”

He laughs, biting the end of her nose before placing a kiss to it. “Fine. No more Yoda quotes in the bedroom. But since this isn’t the bedroom.”

She covers his mouth, trying to stare at him with fire in her eyes. But all that’s there is love, is her laughter, is a softness for him. “I swear to God, Angel, I will walk away right now.”

Calum sighs, but nods, signalling his agreement to not quote anymore Star Wars. He wraps his arms around her waist as she slowly pulls her hand away. Calum waits. She’ll give in too soon. She’ll believe in his agreement. Right as she relaxes into his embrace, he squeezes her into a hug. “Feel the Force.”

“I fucking hate you, Cal! Oh my god, I do.” She laughs, attempting to wrestle from his grasp. He peppers her face and neck in loud, wet kisses, punctuating each one with a “muah” sound effect. She knows she can’t win. Not in a game of pure strength, so she gets a good handful of hair into her hands and pulls. Calum immediately ceases with playful kisses a whimper falling over his throat. His grip slackens and he lets her pull his head up.She pushes away from him, settling onto the edge of the coffee table.

“Don’t laugh,” she warns.

Why would he laugh? All he can think about is the pleasure swimming in his veins. She peels her shorts away to reveal Wonder Woman underwear. “If you think those panties are gonna ruin this mood, you have got me all wrong.” Calum pushes shorts and underwear off, wiggling his fingers for her to crawl back onto his lap.

“My knees are already gonna be mad at me,” she teases, running her fingers over his length. It’s been way too long. Her mouth is already watering at the sight of him, mind already reminding her what he taste like. She stands, holding out her hands. Calum stands with her assistance before she’s pushing him into the wall.

“Shouldn’t you be the one against the wall?” he teases, but his laughter dies in his throat when she sinks to her knees. Her hands wrap around him with no apprehension and tug up.

“Hands behind your back please?”

Widening his stance a bit, Calum holds his hands behind his back, bracing into the wall. Her tongue and lips slips over with ease. There’s the initial moment of tensing before he relaxes into the sucking, slurping, tugging of her mouth and hands. She swirls around his length with the top of her tongue, flicking at head before sucking his back down her throat. “Fuck,” he hisses at the feeling of him hitting the back of her throat. She gags around him and pulls back for a moment.

His toes are curling. His hands are fists, have been for what feels like hours now, but knows are only minutes. She slurps some of the excess salvia, but the vibration sends a current through Calum’s body. “God-fuck, baby,” he whines, watching her. He wants nothing more than to grab a fistful of her hair, wipe the tears falling down her cheeks. “Oh, please, can I touch you?” his voice is just a pant.

He gets no answer. She just wants to bring him over the edge, just wants to hear the groan ripping over his throat. She’ll stop at nothing to hear it. Her hand pulls faster, her bobs become more swallow. But her pace is relentless. Calum feels like he’s chipping paint off her wails, but how hard he’s scratching to keep his hands in place. His hips rut into her mouth once, then a second time. He’s gonna come down her throat. Tearing his hands from behind his back, he grabs both sides of her face, stilling her. He gives another rut of his hips, hitting the back of throat. She gags around him and the sudden squeeze is all he needs. His groan tears over his throat. Calum drops his head into the wall, emptying himself into her. His vision stars for a moment until her nails dig into his thighs. Then he hisses from the pleasurable pain.

His breathe still gone, he brings his gaze back down to her, she’s got tears down her face. He pulls out of her mouth and she coughs. “Sorry,” he whispers, pulling her up. “I’m sorry.” Calum wipes her cheeks with the pads of his thumbs, allowing her time to catch her breathe. Once he’s sure she’s breathing steadily, he pulls her in. He knows what he taste until on her tongue. But he just needs her close. Their kiss is soft. Arms wrapped around his neck, their bodies press close other. Calum lets his hands wander, sliding between her legs. She’s soaked, so much so, he slides in one finger giving test pumps before deciding he can easily insert a second.

She shudders against him, back bowing a little. Calum wraps his left arm around her, hoisting her into a studier position. “Come around my fingers, yeah, babycakes?”

Her words die in her throat as he pumps faster. Watching her, mouth hanging opening, the tiny sounds and moans falling over her lips, she reminds him of a painting come to life--nothing more perfect to him. Her latch around his neck tightens, her head dropping to his chest. He continues to push his fingers in and out of her curling up into the fleshy part of her. “Hmm, God,” she cries.

“That’s right,” he whispers into her ear. He drags his lips over her skin, kissing the parts he can reach, bending to nip at her collarbones.

“Calum,” she hums, her legs start to shake. She can’t stand hardly. She’s not going to be able to stand by herself, she thinks. The wave of orgasm crashes over her, hits her all at once. “God,” she shouts, voice straining and eventually giving out on her. Her mouth hangs open, clutching, clawing at Calum to keep up, to keep steady. He rides out the rest of high, feeling as her holds slackens.

Gently, he pulls his fingers out of her, bring them to his own lips. In her post orgasm haze, she can just register the sounds of Calum moans in her ears as he licks his fingers clean. She smiles up at him, tugging at his wrist. His hand in front of her she licks around the metal of his fingers, collecting her own arousal on her tongue. “Can’t let you have it all,” she grins, and then drops her head back into his chest.

“No,” he chuckles, “no you can’t. Clearly.” Both arms wrapped around her, they stay hugged together, his back still pressed into the wall.

“I will be able to walk in approximately 6.3 seconds. And it’ll be the bed for nap. Care to join me?” she laughs, sound muffled by his skin.

“Sounds good to me.”

#calum hood #calum hood imagine #calum hood 5sos #calum hood smut #calum hood fanfic #calum hood fic #calum 5sos #5sos #5sos fanfic #5sos fic #5 seconds of summer #5 seconds of summer fanfic #5 seconds of summer fic #5 seconds of summer smut #5ssos smut #h writes #luke hemmings #michael clifford #ashton irwin

76 notes · View notes

fangs-frthmmrs · 3 years

Text

rules: answer 30 questions and tag some blogs you want to know better.

I was tagged by the ever so lovely lj @ofalltheginjoints 😘 and the equally wonderful mary @headfirrstforhalos on my main blog 💕! I hope you don't mind me combining both tags here.

name/nickname: carly

gender: *Jenna marbles voice* I'm a 25 year old lady

starsign: cancer sun, gemini moon, leo rising

height: 5'2"

time: 11:03 am

birthday: July 22nd

favorite bands: fall out boy, paramore, idkhow, gym class heroes, mcr, cobra starship, the used, the brobecks, the wombats, the hoosiers, the highwaymen, gorillaz.

favorite solo artists: hozier, elton john, mika, frank iero, patrick stump, mitski.

song stuck in my head: let me be your girl by the damned things

last film: hana no asuka gumi 2. technically it was an anime ova from the 90's but that counts, right?

last show: castlevania

when I made this blog: i think I made it in 2015 but it sat vacant until 2019 and I made my main blog in 2012.

last thing I googled: schadenfreude because I wanted to make sure i spelled it right. and then how to do a readmore on mobile. i hope it worked!

what i post: here, bandom things and a mix of other things that I feel would fit better here than on my main.

on my main I post an even more random assortment of things. it's a mess, really.

other blogs: @bbulbasaurus-rex it's my main blog and I interact and follow back from there.

@daggerfall-demoiselle is a pretty much abandoned sideblog i made to post stuff about my elder scrolls ocs. because i just ended up posting about tes on main.

do I get asks: sometimes.

why did I choose my url: it's named after an actress from the 1910s who was known for scamming railroad companies up and down the west coast. I also chose it partially because the fob song title i wanted to use was too long.

my main is bbulbasaurus-rex because I like bulbasaur and puns.

following: too many

followers: 269 on this blog. 2,189 on my main blog

average hours of sleep: 7, I think.

lucky number: 19.

instruments: I played the clarinet in middle and high school.

dream trip: I dunno, maybe a road trip across the us with some friends and my dogs.

favorite food: tortas de asada!

favorite song: it's changes way too often for any sort of definitive answer to this question.

last book I read: I read parts of a book from the 1910s about dog breeds.

nationality: american

top three fictional universes you'd like to live in: the elder scrolls, pokemon, and mass effect.

favorite color: purples and dark blues.

I'll tag: @potatoes-n-stuff @itswarmerinthebasement and @justkindaconfused

#tag thingy #thank you both 💓#this took quite a while

5 notes · View notes

felsenbluete · 3 years

Text

Mass textpost with things I was tagged in over the years (and I mean years, I think some of them might be three or more I’m so sorry lmao)

@undead-letsrebellamy

Indoor plants or gardens // cloud-watching or star-gazing // water or fire // paperback or hardcover // running or hiking // sleeping with socks or without socks // fruit or vegetables (10 yo me would shoot me on sight) // hanging plants or succulents // dark wood or light wood // handwritten or typed // instagram or pinterest // braids or pigtails // dc or marvel // books or movies // oceans or meadows // forests or fields // sweet or salty // ice cream or chocolate // hoodies or sweaters // long hair or short hair (vokuhila) // piercings or tattoos // summer or winter // boots or sneakers // cars or motorcycles // curls or straight hair // castles or cottages // sunny days or storms // reptiles or birds // disney or nickelodeon // strawberries or watermelon // essays or posters // phones or laptops // glass or stone // dark or light // photos or paintings // circuses or theatres // reading or writing // dogs or cats // poetry or novels // monsters or ghosts // thrift shops or libraries // fiction or non-fiction

@northernmoments Name/Nickname: Kira Jennifer, the only nick name I’ve ever had was Jenjen and that’s just a shame Pronouns: She/Her, but honestly brave of you to speak about me Star Sign: Aries Height: 178 cm Time Currently: 13:05 When is Your Birthday: 15.04. Favourite Band/Groups: die ärzte, Guns ‘n Roses, Linkin Park, Kaizers Orchestra, Fiddler’s Green Favorite Solo Artists: Howard Shore should count!, also P!nk Stuck in Your Head: Caledonia by Celtic Thunder, but that’s because I’m listening to it right now Last Movie You Watched: I Am Legend Last Show You Binged: tried Superstore, but watchseries is down rn Last Book You Read: the last one I actually finished was Going Postal by Terry Pratchett. When You Created Your Blog: 2013? Last Thing You Googled: How to spell Sir Terry Pratchett’s last name Other Blogs: about three for just different #vibes, a ski jumping side blog that has so many followers and where I’m the saltiest person on earth, also one for Naruto (don’t look at me), one “studyblr”/”langblr”/resource mine Why I Chose My Url: Wanted a Tolkien one and in the audiobooks by Bluefax the way Smaug says this “title” is one of my personal highlights Do You Get Asks: almost never How Many People Are You Following: about 20 actually active blogs How Many Followers Do You Have: looking at my activity: 8 Average Hours of Sleep: ~8 hours Instruments: viola/violin What I’m Currently Wearing: grey sweatpants, grey socks, grey sweater, my Gollum-tshirt Dream Job: Rentner (in all honesty I would enjoy being a housewife) Dream Trip: I want to go to Iran just to eat fruit and meet potential in-laws, why is that so hard Favorite food: pannekoeken or Palatschinken, I hate American pancakes, it’s important to me to state how much I disrespect thick pancakes Top Three Fictional Universes You’d Like To Live In: 1, 2 & 3 are all Lummerland

@curuvari

spell or curse ∙ abandoned mansion or haunted cementery ∙ vampire slayer or ghost hunter ∙ phoenix or griffin ∙ wrist bite or neck bite ∙ fairy godmother or evil stepmother ∙ herbs or potion ∙ ghost or wraith ∙ dragon scales or werewolf claws ∙ druid or mage ∙ elf or hobbit ∙ divination or necromancy ∙ wand magic or hand magic ∙ centaur or unicorn ∙ dark fairytale or disney-style fairytale ∙ sword or bow & arrow ∙ siren or water nymph ∙ garlic or silver ∙ talking animal or walking tree (but in a Huorn, not in a Ent way) ∙ demon trap or crossroads pact ∙ enchanted fairy forest or mermaid lagoon

@mattikitku

first 10 songs on shuffle - note: my itunes library is very very old, but on the other hand I haven’t really listened to music in years, so here we go

1. Massachusetts - Ylvis 2. Treebeard - Howard Shore 3. Your Mother Should Know - The Beatles 4. Pushing Me Away - Linkin Park 5. Pfingsten - Christoph & Lollo 6. Out Ta Get Me - Guns ‘n Roses 7. Rage of Poseidon - Apocalyptica 8. Monster Monster - Lordi 9. Wie es geht - die ärzte 10. Forth Eorlingas - Howard Short

@mona-liar only the answers that weren’t already included above

Sexuality: very deep into aspec territory and we’ll leave it at that Hogwarts House: Ravenclaw Favorite Animal: cats Number of Blankets: one, I’m German Where I’m from: Westfalen Dream Trip: oh, also Singapoor Why I created this account: I was really into ski jumping and Ylvis

uhh, so anyone who is tagged already choose one you wanna do? also @margalotta and @take-hell-with-a-smile

#I love everyone that has ever tagged me in anything #and esp mona-liar and mattikitku: I've felt bad about this at least thrice a week #the first two @s don't work because Tumblr truly is a website #EDIT: now they do!!

6 notes · View notes

blackfemmecharacterdependency · 4 years

Text

09. That’s How Hope Died

My apologies friends and familiars, but I absolutely don’t think that I can continue to do this story as standalone pieces anymore and to add on to the possibly not great news, there’s more chapters of story to be told here. But, those who can stay, I’m glad to have you here. 2721 Words, Trigger Warnings: Mental health issues, abuse, child death, grief

The key to having a successful “challenge” video or a hot “remix” was to have a plan proactively. Grace would have about a dozen different new choreos in mind at any given time, and she worked on beats a lot when she probably should be doing other things. She had various number outfits in mind. She had remix beats in mind and the clips of videos that she might want to add to such remixes. This was her happy getaway. The hours that she put into all of her dance training, her classical music instruments, and her academics made her feel like she earned a few to just create things that she enjoyed. And she had an outpouring of creativity from 14-16.

Whenever a new hot song would come out, she would hear it and wonder how it might sound if she remixed it with the R747 (she named all of her creations with “stock numbers” until they became associated with a released song). She might think to herself, the choreography C929 will be perfect for this! Even her performance outfits, “And if I wear the W23… well… This is gonna be fire!”

So, she might hear, for example, a new song by Ghairrisahn ft Fr8-Tre/in (for the old folks, that’s pronounced Garrison, ft Freight Train… See, Garrison is how it’s pronounced, but she spells it that way to stand out and well, Fr8-Tre/in’s name is Treyvon, they called him Tre growing up and you know, Freight TRE and add the “N,” sound like a play on words?) Her parents absolutely wouldn’t have listened to her explain. The hired help often had to, though, especially if they happened to be around while she was creating or putting together creations for presentation…

She would hear the song, decide and type into her phone’s notes: Shucky Ducky by Ghairrisahn ft Fr8-Tre/in. R747. C929. W23. As soon as she got home, she would check to see if any challenges or remixes of the song were released yet, because the Internet was fast and she was at school all day and sometimes, rehearsals well into the night. If it wasn’t already a thing, or if it was a thing, but the thing was null, she would make the remix of the song with her remix beat, then play it as she wore the outfit she prepped and performed the choreography she created. Then, she would post it, atting the artist, and hashtagging the song, TheApex, ApexChoreo, ApexBeauty,ShesBeautyShesGrace,Gracecore, (song title)remix and challenge, among others.

All of those would always skyrocket. Her favorite artists would always eventually see them, sometimes soon. Ghairrisahn even said that she wanted her to be in one of her videos. (Her mother was attentive to that bit of information when she shared it).

When she called Simon to tell him, he already knew. Of course he did. That dude was always on his computer. He always had hella tabs open. He was working on maybe 4 assignments for school, at least 2 of his stories, keeping up with his favorite fandoms, and checking social media - which he hardly ever got on to talk to people that he knew in real life, but he still was entertained by many of them and usually kept watch of all of her pages, whether or not it dawned on her.

When they were 15, she was invited on a summer tour with Ghairrisahn, to dance. It was a dream come true for her, even though her parents were very reluctant to agree to this. Filming a music video was one thing, but gallivanting across the country all summer was another thing entirely. “Mom, this would be just like if I had gotten the ballet spot in Germany!”

“No it isn’t. THAT was a world renown dance troupe and you BLEW it. THIS is some girl who sounds like she’s singing underwater, never wears a full sized blouse and almost unquestionably engages in recreational smoking.” Simon was typing on his phone. He didn’t get involved.

“She is a Grammy award winning icon! Everybody knows her. You know who knows that dance troupe? Ballet heads. That’s who. Mom, to be successful, in this day in age isn’t just about money and high standing. It is about fame and visibility! AND, if I’m on tour, I have that many places to use my products and promote the brand and bring in revenue to the company!”

Mrs. Monroe sighed, “Alright. That sounds like a good idea. But, I’m sending you with your team. You’re not to be in the same vehicle as that marijuana girl. You’re to only interact with her and her team for business purposes and you will adhere to the schedule that your team provides.”

She clenched her fists and jumped up and down, excitedly. Simon’s eyes looked up from his phone to watch her, but he didn’t react in any other ways until she rushed over and hugged him, “We’re going on the road with Ghairrisahn!” She squealed.

He sighed and wiped a hand down his face, “Grace, I can’t go on the road with you this summer. You know I have like 6 different major things that I need to do this year.” Her face fell. “I wish I could. I love Ghairrisahn. She’s my top five celebrities whose hair I wanna smell…” Grace and her mother both made disgusted and confused faces that he ignored and kept talking, “But I literally have a major engineering program, a science camp to prepare for this upcoming school year, the journalism workshop, orientation for the early college courses path, the Dean’s meet and greet, and I’m heading some things for the scouts that I signed on to before I realized that I’d have to do some of the other things. I can’t go right now. Junior year is the most important year of my high school career. Not to mention, you know that I’m being emancipated next year. I just… I don’t have time to tag along this time, Grace.”

She nodded her head, sadly. “Well, that’s cool. But, I mean, I’ll be able to fly you out to a show or two, right?”

He shrugged, “Send me the tour schedule when you get it, and I’ll let you know.”

“What’s your mom gonna do while you’re doing all of that?” She asked. He frowned and stared at her. She was concerned. He knew that she didn’t mean any harm. But, asking about his mother while her mother was still around was pretty inconsiderate, even for her. She must’ve realized from her face that it wasn’t something he wanted to discuss. Because she fell back and clasped her hands together, “Well, since we’re both still around, let’s go do something in town together. You do have a little free time right now, right?”

“Yeah,” he said defeatedly.

“Yeah,” she imitated and reached out for him with her hand to pull him up off of his favorite cushioned lounging chair. “Mom, we’re going!” Grace called. Her mother had stopped paying attention to them several minutes ago, pretty much whenever the conversation no longer concerned her. She didn’t even hear Grace excuse herself.

“It’s hot! Why do you ALWAYS have on a hoodie?” Grace asked.

“I don’t have one at school.”

“Because they aren’t allowed.”

“Exactly. We’re not at school. Nobody can tell me what I can and can’t wear,” he said.

They were quiet for a moment. She didn’t know what was wrong with him, but she knew that something was. “Hey, do you wanna record ourselves doing skateboard tricks?” She asked.

“Is that your way of asking me to record you doing some skateboard tricks, Grace?”

“You can do yours too!” She laughed.

“I just wanna walk right now,” he said. She bit her lip and danced alongside of him, singing Shucky Ducky. Simon looked over at her and the smile of his features returned. She was good for that. Making him feel better about things that really just didn’t feel good. After a while, some thought, letting it rush around in his head, he said, “She’s going to go live with my grandmother.” Grace stopped dancing and stared at him with wide eyes. “She refuses to go to a hospital. I can’t get dad to come home right now and I just… don’t have the time to care for her. I was gonna be gone in a few months, anyway. Leave it to her, I never did anything to even help her over these years. The story that my grandmother believes is actually quite different from the events that my mind has collected.” Grace rubbed his back, but didn’t say anything. Simon had tears welling up in his eyes. “Do you know how many times she’s taken a swing at me, and I’ve had to restrain her to keep her from connecting? How many times she’s yelled at me, berated me for innocent missteps and mistakes that children simply make? All of the times that I wanted to just put that pillow over her face and not let go until she stopped moving?” He was shaking. “Now, apparently she has bruises all over her that I supposedly put there and my grandmother just believes that I’m capable of it, because I killed my sister, why not try my mom too?” He roared at the sky and covered his face with both hands.

Grace looked around for some place to sit, and just decided on the grass under a tree. She led him over, sat him down and rested on her knees, looking at him, but not knowing what to say. He didn’t really talk much about his sister. What she knew about it was what she had looked up on news sources on the Internet (only to understand more, not to be sneaky or harm him in any way), and she never brought up what she learned, because she knew it would be very painful for him.

According to every source that she had found, the little girl’s death was an accident. She and her brother had been playing, they got into an argument, she ran off, he gave chase, she climbed up a ladder to try to hide in the attic, he pulled her leg and she fell and hit her head. It was an accident. A freak accident. She shouldn’t have been able to die from the fall. There were a few reports that the boy had possibly “thrown her hard” to the floor, but even knowing how angry Simon could get and not actually putting it past him to accidentally get that angry, she rationalized that even still, at 10, he wouldn’t have had the strength to cause reasonable damage to a 4 year old. She wanted to tell him that right now, but he didn’t know that she knew that much about it and it seemed like it might only upset him more to find out that she looked into it.

He was red in the face, hot, breathing hard, and crying, and he didn’t want her near him or looking at him at the moment. But, there she was. Where else would she be?

“Simon, I’m so sorry that your mom… is the way that she is. But, on the bright side, she’s not gonna be your problem anymore. She’ll be your grandmother’s and I mean… that’s her daughter. Who knows what she might have done to contribute to the person that she became…”

He looked up suddenly and stared at her in horror, “Do you think I’ll be like that? Do you think… I mean… I get so angry and I get violent, and I lash out… Do you think I’m like her? Am I gonna treat my family that way? My kid?”

Grace leaned forward to place her hands on Simon’s shoulders and said, “I think that you’re the best person I’m ever going to meet, that is of course until you have kids, because then they’ll be the best people, because you’re not going to make the same mistakes your parents did. I think for what you’ve been given, your anger and violence and lashing out is totally justified. And it isn’t like you just go around beating up the defenseless. I mean, yes, sometimes… we’re a little quick on the draw and maybe hurt somebody that probably didn’t deserve it that much, but there are actual school shooters and like… pedos and stuff out there. A kid who beats on people who deserve it every now and then, destroys some stupid property or whatever is like nothing compared to like… those types.”

“So… I’m not a good person, just not the worst,” he said.

“You’re the best person I KNOW.”

“You know like 3 people.”

“I know plenty of people!”

“Outside of your immediate family and me, name ONE.”

She stammered and he laughed a little. She was grateful for that, even if she was flustered. “The red… um… shirt… Cameron!”

“Cameron… The… guy who works at the Target right outside of the gated community?”

“Yes! See… I know people.” Now, he laughed heartily and threw his head back.

She knew kids at school who gave her presents’ names. She would always thank them and say something nice to them about their presents, whether or not they liked them. It was a trend to give her things and IF someone noticed her using or having the thing later, they had bragging rights, though no matter what anybody gave her, she preferred anything that Simon gave her over all of them. They never understood why, but she did. She knew that their presents came from wanting her to love them. His presents came from already loving her.

“Hey… do you want to go visit her?” She asked.

“Visit who?” he wondered.

“Hope,” she said. He looked startled. He knew that he never told her his sister’s name, but now that he was calm, she was testing the waters to see how he felt about her having at least some portion of knowledge.

He whispered, “I never go there.”

“I won’t try to force you,” she said.

After a moment, he said, “I want to…”

His hands were shaky until Grace took them in hers and smiled up at him, “Then let’s do it. We’ll stop by a shop and get her a nice bouquet.” She let go of one of his hands and pulled the other to follow her. He still didn’t want to say more about his sister, but some part of him wished that the visit would change something inside of him. He didn’t want to think about the word “Hope,” to describe his desires. It felt wrong.

He cried a lot. Grace smoothed her hand across his back and remained quiet. After a long while, and he was seemingly out of tears, she said, “Maybe I should skip the tour. I’ll probably have opportunities like this in the future. I’m pretty hot right now.”

“You always are.” He wanted to tell her not to do that. That she deserved to go on the tour and that she should have fun, but just like when she wanted to tell him that he didn’t have to write about his family to get into the academy, he didn’t have the nerve to openly oppose what was best for him.

What was best for him was that the one person that he could cry in front of was there for all of the summer nights that he was already certain that he would cry from stress alone. But it was up to her, just like it had been up to him to decide that he wanted to be at school with her, even if he was going to have to hurt a little to get there.

The difference was she ultimately decided that it was best that she went. He didn’t like it, but they had been apart before in the past and even if she had been in town, he was going to be constantly busy anyway. Still… he emotionally logged it as a time that she was not there for him when he needed her to be. Was it fair? Maybe not. But… it was simply how he felt about it.

#If They Didn't Get on the Train #AU Infinity Train #Infinity Train #Nesha Fanfiction #Infinity Train Fanfiction #fics

20 notes · View notes

dcedgelordess · 3 years

Text

Top 100 songs of 2020 part 2

I started writing this sometime in December, but I became so depressed I never had a chance to finish it. If things look outdated, thats because I wrote it in December, before there was a vaccine. I am in a musical mood and felt like continuing where I had left off. These are songs 26 to 57

1. A Song That Described Your Winter-Britney Spears-What it's Like to be Me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2IQgJx05JxE

The beginning of the year, even before COVID hit, was rough because I was dealing with some physical and psychological issues. I had a few psychotic episodes over winter break and really couldn’t treat it because of lack of time as I was playing catch up with the previous semester of school. I didn’t go to school spring of 2020 because I was so burnt out. My family was disappointed in me but they had no idea the hell I went through during that month.

2. A Song That Described Your Spring-Cake-The Distance

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F_HoMkkRHv8

I was manic throughout the spring and eventually diagnosed with bipolar II disorder. For those who don’t know I started a soundcloud account and made a goal of creating 200 songs in quarantine. I completed that goal within the span of four months. I chose the Distance because it's one of the many songs I remixed.

3. A Song That Described Your Summer-Ozzy Osbourne-Crazy Train (Song to Grow On)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tMDFv5m18Pw

I was dealing with depression after the mania hit. My depression had many forms. One day I’d be suicidal, the next day I’d just be lazy. Add COVID to the mix and you have one hot mess.

This is one of many songs to grow on as mental illness is a prominent theme of my life, even though I’m in a somewhat better place now than I was in June.

4. A Song That Described Your Autumn- Erik Satie-Gymnopédies I

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-Xm7s9eGxU&ab_channel=DistantMirrors

Autumn was uneventful as was my late summer and my winter. Not to say that this song is boring but there isn’t a lot that happens in this song. It makes perfect waiting music.

5. A Song That Described Your End of the Year-Lindsay Sterling Shatter Me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=49tpIMDy9BE

I was feeling hopeful for a vaccine and sure enough one has finally been made. I know things aren’t going to go back to normal for a while. But this is a song about hope.

6. A Song that Describes Your Childhood: Power of Love from the Sailor Moon North American Soundtrack (Song to grow on)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dV3AdFBqUP4&ab_channel=SerenaH

Sailor Moon had a big impact on me as it played a role in my childhood. I remember listening to the Full Moon Collection on repeat. This song had to be one of my favorites on the album. I chose this song over any other Sailor Moon song because I’m a frim believer that the power of love can conquer any obstacle.

7. A Song About Someone You Wish You Forgot About-Tragic Tantrum-Only With You

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3P7sx7RNXSA

This song is about a toxic relationship that lasted since childhood up until just recently. Everytime I listen to this song I think of him and how grateful I am that he is no longer in my life.

8. Song with a Number in the Title: When the Clock Struck 12-Them

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DOMDPTIq_Mw

9. A Song from Your One of Your Fandoms: Trust Love-Casey Lee Williams (RWBY)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGc5cQ6ePbw

10. A Disney Song or a Disney Cover You Like: Oogie Boogie Song from the Nightmare Before Christmas

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=clURHZ5TfCQ

Speed Round stolen from AssassinJ2. Instead of spelling out my name I will list genres and I will put down a song that I like from 2020.

11. Alternative: Muse-Knights of Cydonia (songs to grow on)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_sBOsh-vyI

12 Blues: Big Bad Voodoo Daddy-Save My Soul

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5IEt63qOSI

13 Classical: Dvorak-New World Symphony 4th Movement

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jVDofBFtvwA

14 Cover: Northern Kings-Kiss From a Rose

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDLSlg78gFU

15 Dance: Krewella-Marching On

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bjIixf2uEQU

16 Emo: Fall Out Boy-Just One Yesterday (I don’t know if this song counts)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSfKSUd31MM

17 Electronica: Crystal Castles-Empathy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NLi2v-Gq-5A

18 Film Score: Jeff Williams-Forever Fall Part II

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRLmb8tJqOA

19 Folk: Dreadnoughts-Randy Dandy Oh

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZwXPSaRQRo8

20 Grunge: Alice in Chains-Man in the Box

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TAqZb52sgpU

21 Hardcore: Silverstein-November

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGnXJIVgUv8

22 Hip-Hop: Coolio-Gangsta’s Paradise

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPO76Jlnz6c

23 Industrial: Rammstein-Radio

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z0NfI2NeDHI

24 Jazz: Robyn Adele Anderson-My Humps (songs to grow on)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bRsDIUji_sw

25 J-pop: Peach Hips-Moon Revenge

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YFQf-af4oE

26 March: Falkone-Ronda Alla Turca (Turkish March)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cULdQvqYLeY

27 Metal: Helloween-Salvation

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G1uKfkj5tl4

28 Orchestral: Igor Stravinsky-Enemy God and the Dance of the Spirits of Darkness

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cew07dTHF3A&ab_channel=RoyalScottishNationalOrchestra-Topic

29 Pop: Britney Spears-Do Something

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bb1ad7r5oN8

30 Psychedelic: King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard-Crumbling Castle

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uLP8rFrL1W0

31 Rockabilly: Horrorpops-Walk Like a Zombie

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K9GctV18thM

#music #top 100 #power metal

2 notes · View notes

prettyoddfever · 3 years

Text

the Pretty. Odd. hype: part 1

(the main post)

So on December 11, 2007 Billboard announced that Panic! at the Disco’s second album had an actual release date for March 25, 2008... and then P!ATD’s myspace & website suddenly went blank. Their myspace picture was even plain white, and they posted a bulletin that said “And so it begins” with a link to their site. The site looked like an empty white screen, but it turned out that the source code had a hidden message: “Oh, hello. Glad you could make it.” (idk who initially thought to check the source code, but bless them because pretty sure I was just like “oh dear the band’s having technical issues”).

Adam was the main guy who ran P!ATD’s online stuff, so this whole season must have been really fun for him. His away message also said “panicatthedisco.com - and so it begins.” Two more lines had been added to the site’s source code the next time I checked back: “Did you have any trouble finding the place? Hope you enjoy.” So there were four lines now (but I wasn’t sure if the last two were added at the exact same time or not).

Some people were reading way too far into the blank white site and saying that it was an allusion to The Beatle’s White Album or a 3-year anniversary for P!ATD’s myspace. Other fans changed their own layouts, icons, and/or pics to be blank white too. I thought that this was the extent of what the band would be doing to get everyone’s attention because it definitely brought fans back and got them talking. Buuuut the next day something showed up that was actually visible:

A lot of people guessed right, but my favorite suggestions I saw were “jon don’t have curry” and “you do not have a taco tray.” Adam was totally creeping on what fans were saying online haha because the site was briefly changed to say “YOU DON’T HAVE” with a link to this picture:

Ok I’m going to have to tie in a few events here that I went into more detail about in other posts... so on December 13th we learned some details about an upcoming video shoot for Nine in the Afternoon, which confirmed that the song would be the first single. Then the band’s site added this small blue clock that you could only see if you highlighted everything:

It was placed under the “o” on the word puzzle and there were some guesses over the significance of the placement and/or what the clock even meant… like was Nine in the Afternoon the second song on the new album since it was under the second letter, or was something going to happen at 9? People did say that they noticed a lot of the updates had been done at 9pm. I saved a note about checking at 9pm EST and that turned out to be true for future updates too. Eventually you could scroll down and get the letters to solve the puzzle, but I heard a fan had already figured it out because the puzzle image’s name was “ohidontknow1.gif” and they just switched the last number to 2 and accessed the solved image with the letters filled in to spell “YOU DONT HAVE TO WORRY.” (I bet that person breezed through the final challenge in late January then lol).

side note: I’m leaving out all of the “clues” from the fake myspace & facebook accounts for band members btw. Those were either nonsense or else they just repeated what the site said and added a bunch of the usual talk about how everything would change in the new era etc.

Then the puzzle disappeared and the site’s title was changed to “YOU DONT HAVE TO WORRY” (similar updates happened on myspace as things got solved on the site). I thought the new title was a message to us about the site, but other people thought it was the name of the new album (this is still up haha). The site was back to a blank white screen now but “Oh, back so soon?” was added to the source code (the previous lines were gone). I remember thinking that this was starting to feel like some kind of game that Jigsaw from Saw was playing with us… and then a freaking jigsaw puzzle showed up less than a week after all of this started, and the line “It’s really nice to see you again” was added to the source code:

There were only 15 pieces in the puzzle, so the most common theory was that there would be 15 songs on the album (there definitely were some other wild guesses though).

Then what looked like a countdown showed up in the empty spot in the bottom right. It said “01:01:08” but turned out to be a date instead of a timer. The first puzzle piece had turned a light shade of grey and the source code was updated to add “care for an hors d'oeuvre?” onto the other lines.

You could hear a garbled part of a song if you hovered over the first puzzle piece. There were a lot of different ideas for what Brendon was singing… some of other people’s guesses that I saved were:

oh wow we’ve lived so long

oh how you’ve been so wrong

yo now we drink some rum

oh homie here’s a song

woah la la bring a bong

oh wow you kids are dumb

oh oh it’s been so long

hold me it’s been so long

Other people thought we were hearing something that was in a foreign language, wasn’t even P!ATD, didn’t contain actual words, or wasn’t a song to begin with… like maybe it was just a hidden message. A couple dedicated fans even saved the crappy audio and played it backwards to look for clues.

A few days later (December 22) MTV shared this video where the guys explained what was up with the whole “you don’t have to worry” thing from the first puzzle & the site title:

youtube

On Christmas the source code said “HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!” and the site had added another song clip to the second puzzle piece… this one was way easier to tell that it was definitely Brendon singing “we’re so sorry we’ve been gone.” I think Adam saw all of the confusion with the first song clip because that one had also been updated with new audio that was easier to understand. (btw – Rolling Stone later posted an article about a few of these puzzle events and claimed that both of the song clips were posted on Christmas, but no… the first one was definitely up like a week before).

So the bottom right part of the puzzle still said 01:01:08... and at 9pm on New Year’s Day the source code was updated to say “WE’RE SO STARVING” and yet another puzzle piece had turned grey. If you clicked on it, you were taken to a myspace blog post with this message & clip of We’re So Starving. So it turned out that this whole puzzle had been leading up to a preview of the new album’s first song. We knew that this song was the intro because of what Spencer said in the MTV interview above.

side note about this song’s reception: Most people who were following the puzzle & other news in 2007 were already expecting a Beatles sound for the second album, so this song + message were hilarious… like of course the guys would be going to Abbey Road next. I thought a lot of fans seemed to get the band’s lighthearted joking tone in the lyrics and treated the song like cheesy fun. However, Rolling Stone reported that fans were “underwhelmed” after their journalist totally misread the tone of some fans who were having fun spamming a livejournal thread. There absolutely were kids on the boards who were genuinely confused or hated the song, so I’m not saying that *everything* was misunderstood. But I think any conclusion about the general fandom’s reaction depended on which forum/community you were looking at and what your basis for comparison was... like I thought people were being surprisingly positive in contrast to the reception of It’s True Love! But I suppose that’s also a reallllly low standard haha. Pete ended up posting on his blog: “Not too sure that anyone gets that the new Panic! song is a joke. Sell me a sense of humor. The new record is different than whatever you are thinking.”

THE NEXT CLUE

A few days before January 10th the site’s title was changed to “01:10:08″ and the source code only said “Nice to see you again.” A lot of us already knew that P!ATD was headlining the 2008 Honda Civic Tour and that the news would be officially revealed/announced on January 10th, so I figured that the "01:10:08″ was referring to that. The new puzzle looked like:

I guess the “A” was a mistake because it was changed to an “E” like a day later... I really wanted to make the puzzle say something about HONDA, so the loss of the “A” felt unfortunate (even though I wasn’t getting very far with it anyways ha).

I had absolutely no idea what to do with this. Some people were yelling about “Pete’s dick” or “Pretty Odd” since we had seen pictures of the band wearing red sashes on the set of the Nine in the Afternoon video a few weeks ago that said “Pretty Odd.” This puzzle turned out to be the reveal of the album title:

We already knew the release date was March 25th, so that helped confirm that the answer was about the album. The source code had been updated to have these 4 lines: “Nice to see you again. Sorry for being late. Traffic was really bad. Hope you weren’t waiting too long.” (I think the traffic part was a reference to how their site briefly crashed).

Then they added a myspace banner with the album release date & name and changed their picture from plain white to the second image here (that picture was taken in December at the LA Arboretum & Botanic Garden). Their myspace status still said PATD is “sorry we’ve been gone.” The exclamation mark had already been removed from their pages.

So now we had a name for the new era that was starting soon. The next clues began almost a week later.

4 notes · View notes