#( love jo..... love liv)

[crossbackpoke-check]

nosy anon again making a return because i think what my brain did was read that i helped find some kind of writing and then did not fully process what the writing was?? but upon rereading i am very intrigued if you ever get the urge to share i will be all eyes/ears/senses required to enjoy things!!

I GET TO DO WIP WEDNESDAYYYYYY!!! the writing exists mostly in the form of a tag (fantastic! 'verse) and also a thirty-two page doc of snippets and planning, so the sense you will be using most is imagination:

don't think i have ever actually formally written out anything about fantastic! 'verse but! the tl;dr of it is that it's a semi-college au: joel is still a hockey player for the lv phantoms, but morgan is a college student-athlete. it's incredibly relevant to the plot that joel falls in love with morgan in the check-out line of a wegman's, lies a little bit, and ends up going back to get his degree.

most of it is just good fun about college kids growing up, but i think there's a lot of parallels between making your way through a development system where traditional "success" isn't always guaranteed (ahl -> nhl, completion of higher education -> pursuit of a career) because that development system isn't always designed for you to "succeed" or have opportunities. heavy quotation marks around success because part of that struggle is learning what you want in life and how you define success. are your dreams achievable? are they still the same dreams you always used to have? it's infinite branching universes of would you still love me if i was a worm (ahl player forever) (a college dropout) (a college graduate) (older) (realizing the fallibility of your body) (uncertain of the future) (human).

silly little snippet:

[cobaltperun]

i have a request if possible ? for a tara carpenter x reader , or any jo character as you see fit , but in my head , it’s always been tara and no gf au-

so basically , if you’re familiar with 5 seconds of summer , every time i listen to them (their self titled album, specifically heartbreak girl) i always come up with like scenarios of r, mindy, amber and wes being 5sos basically and having r write that song about tara and how she’s always calling/texting r about the problems she’s having with chad without realizing that r is in love with her

which ofc leads r to go to amber, mindy and wes to write that song together and having them preform at a local bar/club or something because they’re locally known and tara, sam, chad and the rest of the friend group is in the crowd, being supportive- but once they hear the song , they immediately know who it’s about and just look at tara awkwardly , and- that’s as far as i’ve gotten

Heartbreak Girl

Tara Carpenter x gn!Reader (Request)

First of all, thank you for the request, it kind of just flowed out and here it is. I went with gender-neutral Reader since you didn't specify the gender. I hope you'll enjoy reading this.

Masterlist

Word count: 2.7k

"I know I should have seen it coming, but it still hurts, you know? I still love Chad, I just can't get over him," she sobbed, and you stopped pacing around your room to lean back and rest your head against the wall. You knew the story, you heard it from Tara countless times, and you may have heard it from Mindy even before Tara told you, mostly because Mindy got a bit pissed that Chad would end his relationship with Tara like that. Tara and Chad were in a relationship, they worked the summer job together and met Liv. Chad fell in love and broke up with Tara. The rest was history, and Tara, sharing Chad's circle of friends, and still being in love with him, couldn't move on.

One time Tara told you she figured it would be easier if he cheated on her. He didn't. He just sat down with her one day and said how he felt. Two weeks later Chad and Liv went on their first date and the circumstances kept Tara and Chad as somewhat friends.

"I'm sorry for being a bother, Y/N," she must have noticed your silence.

"You're not being a bother, Tara, I just don't know what to say that I already didn't tell you before," you bit your bottom lip, knowing full well you were lying. You knew what you wanted to say. You wanted to tell her you loved her, that in her heartbreak she kept breaking your heart too. Another sob made you speak before you could think things through. "Let's go out, just the two of us," you suggest, realizing too late what you were saying. "As friends, of course, just to get your mind off of everything," you quickly backtracked, hoping the explanation was sufficient enough, hoping she couldn't hear the nervous tapping of your foot against the floor, or the crack in your voice when you said 'friends' or anything else that could give you away.

Because, as much as you loved her, as much as you wanted to be with her, you didn't want to push her into another relationship when she was vulnerable and still heartbroken. You also didn't want to be her way of getting over Chad and nothing more. And you absolutely didn’t want to take advantage of her emotional turmoil.

"I'd love to, Y/N," it sounded like she stopped crying, thought she still sniffled a bit. "Thanks for being my friend and always being there to cheer me up," her words, even if you just encouraged them yourself, still hurt you.

"Don't mention it, I'm here for you," you brushed it off, subconsciously hoping maybe, just maybe, she'd realize how you feel on her own. You had no idea how mixed the signals you were sending her looked every now and then. In less than a minute you went from proclaiming friendly hanging out to promising to be there for her. "When do you want to meet up?"

Tara paused for a moment. "I'll call you tomorrow at ten to figure that out. Is that okay?"

You nodded and then frowned when you realized a moment later you were on the phone with her. "Of course."

And so you said your goodbyes, and you just slumped into the chair and dropped your head down to the table. A bit recklessly you tossed the phone to the bed on your side and silently expressed gratitude that it didn't hit the wall or drop to the floor. You sighed and placed your hands over your head, feeling like you were stuck in a never-ending cycle with Tara Carpenter.

Against your better judgment, you grabbed a pen and a piece of paper and began writing.

~X~

The friend date went well, better than you imagined it would and you and Tara hung out an hour longer than either of you anticipated. It was a nice change of pace and for a moment you actually convinced yourself you didn't feel anything romantic for her. For a moment, you were reminded of simpler times, when Tara really was just a friend in your eyes. That time was a long time ago, but sometimes you wished you could go back to that, at the very least everything was much simpler back then.

The paper waiting for you at your table broke that illusion and you grabbed your guitar, maybe you had something here after all. As you sat down to try different tunes you sent a message to the band, Mindy, Wes, and Amber, asking to meet up tomorrow for an additional practice.

~X~

The four of you met up in your garage where you kept your instruments, the guitars, and drums, anything else you needed you would just rent out for a couple of days. You were still a local band, so renting still saved you money.

"Let me see if I got everything right. You," Amber pointed at you, almost accusingly. "wrote this song about Tara and you don't want to confess how you feel?" she asked incredulously.

"Come on, it's not that obvious," you defended yourself and pointed at a line in the song. "See? Chad didn't exactly treat her bad, he just broke up with her."

"Yeah, sure, one line is going to convince everyone it isn't about Tara," Mindy added sarcastically and threw her arms up. "It's there for the dramatic effect, Y/N! Remember?" well, yeah, but still, were you really that obvious?

"She got you there," Wes wasn't helping.

You picked up your guitar and began playing the tune you thought would work well with the song. "Listen, I think we got something good here," you tried to focus on the song itself. "Regardless of who it was written for," you muttered.

"You're kidding, right? A sad tune? You're making this a ballad? No way," Mindy went to her drums. "This needs more energy," judging by the tone of her voice she wasn't budging on this. Well, at least she was on board.

"We are totally adding 'Thanks for being a friend' to the lyrics," Amber teased and you just groaned and buried your face in your hands.

"Don't forget being a sucker for anything Tara does," Wes joined in, causing all three of them to laugh at you.

"You're the worst," you muttered, too embarrassed to look at them. As it was the song that maybe could have passed as, you know, not absolutely obvious, might as well be named ‘Tara’ with how specific it was turning out to be.

~X~

Over the next month and a half, you and Tara fell into a bit of a habit. The first two weeks she continued sobbing, and you'd ask her to hang out. The week after that she just complained and you still asked her to hang out. The past few weeks she rarely even mentioned Chad during your calls, but she still insisted you were friends.

Honestly, just the fact that she seemed to be moving on as weeks went by mended your own heart. Somewhere along the line, you found out you were fine with the way things were. In a relationship or as friends, you wanted Tara in your life.

You walked her to her house, the backs of your hands occasionally brushing as you walked. The accidental touches became something both of you were comfortable with, as neither of you moved away from each other.

"You'll be performing tomorrow night, right?" Tara asked out of the blue.

You glanced at her and your eyes met. "Yeah. Are you going to come?" it wouldn't be the first time Tara would be in the crowd. Tara, Sam, Chad, Danny, Anika, and Liv were all supportive of your band, so they regularly came to your performances.

"You're not really asking that, are you? Of course, I'm going to come," she lightly jabbed your arm. "Besides, Mindy might have told me you guys have a new song you'll be performing for the first time in front of a crowd."

That little traitor. You cleared your throat to buy yourself a few extra seconds to get it together.

With the way things were going between you and Tara, you were almost tempted to scrap the song, but the other three voted against it. "No pressure then, it's not like we haven't had a new song in almost four months now," what could you say, it was a bit of a drought period as far as creativity went.

Tara laughed and just for a moment you thought you saw something else in her eyes, something similar to the way you would so often look at her. "You'll do great," she offered a much-needed encouragement as the two of you stopped in front of her house.

"Guess this is it for tonight," you smiled at her.

"Mhm, I'm glad I was the one to ask you out tonight, as friends, of course," she took a step closer and tucked a stray strand of her hair behind her ear. And then you froze when she got on her tiptoes and kissed your cheek. "Thank you, for always being there for me," somehow, this time she omitted the friend part.

"I," you cleared your throat once more. "did say I'd be here for you, didn't I?" you tried to brush it off as you usually did for months now.

The intensity of Tara's gaze captured all of your attention and for a moment you even considered leaning in. You didn't though, you weren't sure she felt the same, or that she actually moved on.

"I'll see you tomorrow night, then?" she asked, lowering her gaze to your lips before quickly looking away.

You noticed it, and you wondered if Tara could hear how loud your heart was drumming in your chest. "Y-yeah," you finally stepped back from her, and the tension you were trying so hard to ignore began fading.

~X~

Tara pretty much threw herself on her bed and buried her face in her pillow. This wasn't good. This wasn't good at all. What was wrong with her? Falling in love with you so quickly and almost out of nowhere. Especially when you so explicitly insisted on hanging out as friends. Perhaps you were insisting too hard to cover your own feelings? A girl could hope, right?

She turned her playlist on, hoping to find some peace in music. As if to spite her, the first song that played was Brian Fallon's You Have Stolen My Heart and she nearly chucked her phone into a wall. Groaning she turned around and tucked herself into a blanket. It was entirely your fault. With your charming smile and clumsy mixed signals, she could never get a good read on them.

~X~

You were amazing on that improvised stage, just mesmerizing to watch and listen to and Tara found herself falling even harder. She also found herself ignoring Sam's teasing smile.

"Thank you, thank you! You are too kind! We'll wrap up the night with a premiere of our new song!" Wes yelled, hyping up the crowd.

"Let's hear an applause for Heartbreak Girl!" Mindy demanded, encouraging the crowd to interact with the four of you.

Tara was pulled to her feet by Anika and they both cheered. The name of the song, however, made Tara's heart skip a beat. Or was it the way you looked at her from the stage?

"You call me up, it's like a broken record, saying that your heart hurts. That you'll never get over him getting over you, and you end up crying. And I end up lying, 'cause I'm just a sucker for anything that you do," you sang, your eyes never leaving Tara's. It felt like there was no one else in the club but the two of you. But you weren't alone, and Tara felt the awkward stares directed at the back of her head.

Did you actually write a song for her?

"And when the phone call finally ends, you say "Thanks for being a friend" and I'm going in circles again and again," now she had no doubt, that the song really was about her. She stopped cheering and just stood there, taking the lyrics in.

She saw you hesitating, probably since you noticed her reaction, and she just smiled. You smiled back and continued.

"I dedicate this song to you, the one who never sees the truth, that I can take away you hurt, Heartbreak girl. Hold you tight straight through the daylight, I'm right here, when you gonna realize that I'm your cure, Heartbreak girl?" did you...? Were you saying what she thought you were saying?

She wasn't reading this wrong, was she?

"I bite my tongue, but I wanna scream out, you could be with me now. But I end up telling you what you wanna hear, but you're not ready. And it's so frustrating, he treats you so bad and I'm so good to you, it's not fair," her heart skips a beat as you continue, quoting the promise to call you tomorrow at ten and once again singing the chorus.

"I know someday it's gonna happen, and you'll finally forget the day you met him. Sometimes I'm so close to confession, I gotta get it through your head, that you belong with me instead," the look in your eyes, the eyes that told her 'This is it, I can't take it back now' it vanquished any doubt she may have had about how you felt.

She just wondered how long you felt that way about her without saying anything? Definitely before you first asked her to hang out as friends, but how long before that? And she felt like apologizing, for not noticing how you felt, for leaning on you for support even if it hurt you as well. And at the same time she fell even harder, because you were there for her even with everything you were feeling you were giving her all the time she needed.

~X~

The moment you ended the song and without any idea where the sudden boldness was coming from you jumped down from the stage and went over to Tara. You took a few deep breaths as you closed the distance and offered her your hand, the guitar still in your other hand.

Yeah, you didn't quite think that through.

Tara raised an eyebrow, clearly looking at the guitar, but then shrugged and took your hand.

"Uh, what now?" you asked sheepishly.

"Isn't that something you were supposed to figure out? Before you jumped down and came over?" she gave you a cheeky, teasing smile.

"I didn't think I'd get this far," you admitted, causing Tara to laugh.

"Just go behind the stage dumbass!" Mindy yelled, with the microphone still on. "And leave the guitar there while you're at it!"

You lowered your head and winced, trying to hide the embarrassment clearly visible on your face. Tara wasn't doing much better as she quickly pulled you behind the stage to escape the teasing.

You packed the guitar as both of you took time to compose yourself and catch a breath. "I really didn't think this through, did I?" you asked.

"No," Tara sat down on the chair near you. "You really didn't," she was fiddling with the loose thread on her shirt.

"I meant it, the song. Well, at least when I wrote it a month and a half ago," you decided to just be honest with her.

Tara raised her head to look at you, you could see hopefulness and uncertainty in her gaze. "What changed?"

You approached and sat down next to her. "I don't think you are still heartbroken," you took her hand.

Tara smiled. "I'm not. I'm in love with a clumsy musician that sucks at flirting," she leaned closer to you.

"Hey, it worked," you closed the distance, capturing her lips in a soft, gentle kiss. "Mhm, how about we go on a proper date then?" she asked when the kiss ended and you couldn't think of any better idea.

[andreal831]

What are your top 5 episodes on both TO and TVD?

This took me some time to put together but if you push me on any of these, I'll probably cave. I haven't rewatched in a while and I feel like I would have to sit down and actually rank them to get a list I feel confident in. A lot of my favorite scenes aren't even in this list because the rest of the episode just doesn't rank high for me. But without further ado, here is my tentative top episode list.

Top 5 Episodes for TVD

5. 1x22 - Founder's Day

Despite how problematic the 'Founder's Day' was (like how they completely disregarded the actual founders. Justice for the Bennetts), Katherine's entrance was done so well. The revelation was a great twist and I love watching people watch this episode for the first time.

It's not higher because everything else was kind of just a normal episode. I love at this point we are getting glimpses of how powerful Bonnie is and Stefan's devotion to Damon. It also begins to build on the mystery of Tyler which was fun. But other than that, it was just a lot of high school drama. Katherine's entrance really made this episode.

This is one that I would probably replace if I rewatched.

4. 6x21 - I'll Wed You In the Summertime /6x22 - I'm Thinking of You All the While

I'm already cheating and combing these episodes, but they are basically just a continuation.

I want to preface this with saying, I hate Matthew Davis more than I can express. I also don't think I like Alaric much in the later seasons. But I did really like him and Jo. This episode was so cute and light and fun. Up until it wasn't in true TVDU fashion.

I loved seeing season 1 Elena again. I will always defend Elena when people get misogynistic with her, but vampire Elena was not my favorite. When she took the cure, I felt like we got the old Elena back. If they hadn't of done that, I probably wouldn't have been sad to see her leave.

We got some really touching moments between Elena, Bonnie, and Caroline, with them getting ready and their goodbye. Bonnie and the feathers had me in tears the first time I watched this episode. We get Stefan torturing Damon with the fact that Damon loves being a vampire, sorry but I loved it. Caroline and Tyler actually talking as friends. Tyler and Liv making me sob. Stefan and Caroline moment. Kai's reappearance was terrible but pretty epic. Bonnie just being an amazing badass. Just all of the chaos was great and Damon faking us out thinking he wouldn't save Bonnie but then ultimately doing so.

My biggest complaint was that Bonnie was so separate from everyone, dealing with Lily with just Matt for back up. Though I do love a good Bonnie/Matt team up.

3. 3x05 - The Reckoning

Surprisingly, this was the first episode I ever saw of the TVDU. I was at a family member's home for a holiday and they had it on and I was hooked. Not only did I love the friendship dynamics in this episode, but the villains were so good. Klaus and Rebekah were unhinged in this episode. It was a great introduction to the best aspects of TVDU.

Stefan fighting the compulsion for Elena is one of the reasons I'll always have a soft spot for Stelena. I loved Matt and Bonnie's friendship in this episode. They were both such selfless people and I loved moments we got of them together. I don't typically like Damon and Katherine, but even their interactions were so funny in this episode.

2. 4x20 - The Originals

Is this cheating?

I always get so excited when I get to this episode because it's time to switch over to The Originals. But come on, we get to meet Cami and Marcel. We get haylijah and klamille's meeting.

It is weird that I almost like it more than the pilot of TO? Just purely for the nostalgia. Also because the pilot removed some of my favorite scenes that I always forget aren't there until I rewatch TO and then i have to go find wherever TVD is streaming.

And then stuff is still happening back in Mystic Falls, I guess.

I could probably also replace this one on a rewatch with a more TVD focused episode but I can't think of any right now.

2x08 - Rose

No one is surprised this one tops the list. Not only is it the introduction of the Originals, but more importantly it's Elijah's introduction. I know I am biased, but this is my favorite episode in TVD and usually the one I start with on rewatches.

I also love Rose and Trevor (RIP). But the tension in this episode is so good and the show struggled to recreate it. They built up Klaus' entrance so much that it was kind of disappointing. Nothing could live up to the hype. But Elijah came out of nowhere. We didn't even know he existed before this episode. He just shows up, all creepy and mysterious, and then just casually comes back to life after being staked in the heart.

I wouldn't change a thing about this episode.

Top 5 Episodes for TO

5. 3x09 - Savior

I'm a sucker for a Christmas episode.

But let's be honest, this is one of the best TO episodes.

We get the trio's reunion, if only briefly. We get Rebekah going mad and trying to kill everyone while dropping some hard to hear truths (sorry Hayley). We get Jackson starting to accept his in-laws. Cute scenes between the Mikaelsons, actually including Hope. Finn helping Freya save their siblings. Freya's first Christmas with her family. Klamille's first kiss. Plus a bunch of drama in the background.

One of my biggest complaints with TO is that it doesn't give us moments of just peace and let them be a family. It is so action packed that we never get to just have a comfort episode. It only took them 3 seasons, but we finally got one (mostly). I mean it ended terribly but I just stop watching before that.

4. 2x01 - Rebirth

This is just Elijah's best episode hands down. And yes I am making this list about Elijah. It's kind of what I do here.

But seriously, he looked so good in this episode and was just so perfect.

I had no idea what to expect out of this episode since season 1 ended with so much up in the air and this episode delivered. So much happened. Elijah being the mastermind while Klaus and Hayley grieved losing Hope. Then them all working together as a team for the first time. And I'd be remis if I don't talk about Elijah's infamous scene of walking into the Guerreras house like he owned it. Also love them trusting Cami to help. Marcel is also in on it. I just love them all working together.

Getting to see Rebekah raising Hope. Marcel and Cami just being hot. But also Cami going to check on Klaus, that scene, the tension. So good. Cami and Elijah talking and then Elijah and Klaus talking about Cami. Perfection. Davina putting Oliver in his place. And then Hayley later doing the same. The introduction of Gia. Even the tension between Elijah and Hayley is so good. I could truly feel all of their grief and desperation. I also love Klaus and Hayley actually talking and Klaus realizing that his scheming is what cost them everything (although he will quickly forget this lesson).

It's another perfect episode. No notes.

3. 4x03 - Haunter of Ruins

I'm honestly surprised an episode from season 4 or 5 is even on this list, but I do love this episode before everything goes to hell.

This episode was another comfort episode.

I clearly loved the amount of haylijah we get. We get our first "I love you" from both of them. Although I headcanon they said it before this. We get them just being super cute and flirty and then super hot. Hayley wearing Elijah's shirt when she runs to check on Hope is so perfect to me. I love the scene of them on the porch. They love each other so much and this episode does a great job expressing it.

We finally get the Mikaelsons all together, even Kol (sorry Finn). I love seeing them behave as siblings in the beginning, bickering. I love how they handled introducing Hope to them and how hesitant they all are, which is so out of character for them, but they have no idea how to interact with a child. Klaus and Hope was so sweet. And Rebekah finally standing up for what she wants and encouraging her brothers to do the same.

My only complaint is Freya and Keelin. I love them because this show is deprived of sapphic representation. But why did they have to make the only sapphic couple's origins be essentially stockholm syndrome. I loved Hayley standing up for Keelin but then Freya just immediately goes after her again. Only thing I would change is how Freya behaved in this episode.

2. 3x22 - The Bloody Crown

May be unpopular, but I loved seeing the Mikaelsons get put in their place. And then I loved Vincent standing on his morals and turning around and put Marcel in his place. Everyone needs accountability.

Marcel awakening as an upgraded Original was so good. We got the return of Rebekah in this episode and she was fantastic. I loved Klaus' trial and I loved Rebekah getting to stand with the enemies (even if it was just the curse/part of the plan). People love to say Klaus didn't deserve it because Marcel was really mad at Elijah, but all of these people were here specifically because of Klaus. They all needed some humbling. Except Rebekah.

I can't talk about this episode without talking about haylijah. The show opens on one of their cutest scenes (we aren't going to talk about the problematic stuff that happened in the episode before). Elijah watching Hayley sleep was adorable. And then we get the scene of Elijah telling Hayley to not grieve him. They break my heart.

2x09 - Map of the Moments

Not surprising, but another Christmas episode.

And no, it's not just because of hayllijah.

I mean, it's not not because of haylijah.

In case you can't tell, my favorite episodes tend to be the comfort episodes. I love the drama, but the reasons I adore these shows are because of bonds. We get to see the Mikaelsons reunite with Hope and actually have some moments of peace together.

There are so many scenes that made me actually laugh out loud. I just adore this episode so much. And yes, I love it because we finally get haylijah getting together, if only briefly.

This was such a fun ask, thank you! What episodes did I miss?

[hysteriaww]

You get kai and bonnie so much together and individually everything you say fits them in canon so well it's too bad the writers really fumbled with them because when kai showed up he was a breath of fresh air and the best part about him is he's all about bonnie that was new and realistic bonkai was their last shot at getting the vampire diaries interest back up again

AH thank you so much for this lovely message, you're so sweet!! Yes, it really is such a shame the writers fumbled Bonkai bc it rly did seem like they had some great ideas there in the beginning, but the execution fell flat :( I feel like Kai was a breath of fresh air not just for us fans but also the cast & crew! U could rly feel their spark of new excitement for a dying show when kai showed up bc i think they all sensed that he was unique and different from the tired, recycled plotlines they'd had since S4.

Ian in particular seemed much more interested in his scenes when Kai was around (and much more lifeless when he wasn't) and Bonnie ofc was *given* much more interesting scenes when Kai was around, compared to prior seasons. Even Alaric & Jo, who started S6 as rick's new boring romance of the season, became relevant, layered and interesting bc of their links to Kai. Like rick loved to play the hero & act like damon was morally beneath him in S6 but his need to protect Jo from Kai brought out a selfish streak that made him go behind Jo & her fam's back to make shady deals w Damon & Kai as long as it kept Jo safe! Even Jo was revealed to be quite crafty considering her backstory of how she tricked & betrayed Kai in 1994, which made her much more interesting than her early role as rick's bland gf.

Even Liv & Luke were (im sorry) SO BORING in S5 but 1000x more interesting in S6 once their story got linked to Kai. His existence single-handedly linked so many disjointed characters & plotlines from previous seasons (like why'd they even bring Rick back after dying in S3? His relationship w Jo (and by extension, Kai) was the only thing that made him relevant for the rest of the goddamn show)! Even the Heretics were introduced to the show through KAI & the gemini/siphoner lore and fully lost steam as soon as Kai wasn't there to make 'em interesting!

As for Kai's links to Bonnie, ya i agree she rly was their last chance to make things interesting bc they'd already given Elena & Caroline "dark" romances that fans were too attached to to accept anything else (see: Delena being forced to stay together; Steroline forever being overshadowed in most fans' minds by Klaroline) so giving Elena & Caroline new pairings would've disappointed fans, whereas Bonnie was a blank slate they could've gone WILD with bc none of her canon pairings had strongly attached fans... yet they gave Elena & Caroline new romances anyway and scrapped Bon's romance with Kai :)))

That is what felt malicious. In S6 alone, they gave Elena who ALREADY HAD DAMON the new guy Liam, then gave Caroline the same guy Liam, Enzo (briefly) AND Stefan, whereas Bon *almost* got Kai & *fully* lost Jeremy in S6. ??? Any writer who paid half as much attention to her fans as Plague did (considering how much ott fan-service she wrote into tvd & how many twitter fights she got into w fans whose ships she disapproved of) HAD to have known her fans wouldn't accept Caroline/Enzo, Care/Stef, Care/Liam or Elena/Liam as much as they loved Care/Klaus & Elena/Damon. Yet she did it anyway bc she preferred LOSING FANS to giving Bonnie someone interesting!

She even planned Kai to be Bon's love interest in S6 bc she thought he wouldn't be popular w fans & instantly torpedoed that once she noticed fans' love for him bc, as I said before, Plague PAID ATTENTION to her fans' reactions. So fans having lukewarm feelings about Steroline was enough to get 'em married, but fans LIKING Kai was enough to get Bonkai axed. It's a common joke that Plague saw Caroline as her self-insert (neurotic, hyper-organized blonde control-freak) which is why she dated more men than even Elena. But I think a large chunk of tvd's white teen girl fans saw Care as a self-insert too (bc w each subsequent season, Caroline was increasingly written & designed that way, which is why fans turned on tvd's original self-insert, Elena, & worshipped Care instead).

Her "im never the one, im not perfect like elena" insecurities made her a blank canvas for (white) girls to see themselves in, which is why she wins Miss Mystic Falls, why she's a privileged Founding Fam member, why she gets to dress fancy & go to Mikaelson balls that have nothing to do w her, why she gets ALL the men, why she becomes the 1st vampire to be pregnant, why she gets to marry Stefan (then instantly lose him so she can go kiss Klaus in the spin-off), why she gets to be tvd's last vampire standing, why she repeatedly gets to have her cake and eat it too. By presenting Elena as "perfect/ideal" & Caroline as an "underdog," fans naturally sympathized more with Care's "struggle" (even tho she repeatedly got EVERYTHING!) Based on this, Plague refused to let ppl like Klaus date Bonnie (which would've made sense) but shoved him w Caroline (which didn't make narrative sense) bc that gave her & white fans the chance to see themselves in Care & feel like THEY were dating Klaus.

(Btw I wanna add that I actually do like & enjoy Caroline! This is a critique of the shadiness that went into *writing* Caroline, not a critique of Caroline herself)

Similarly, Kai was allowed to want Bonnie as long as fans didn't like him, but once he got popular, Plague killed Bonkai bc she believed that she & her (white) fans wouldn't be able to see themselves in Bonnie and feel like THEY were the ones dating Kai. But Kai was not Klaus, Stefan, Damon, Enzo or Kol. His character was CONCEIVED w Bonnie in mind to the point that erasing his obsession w her would make him not even feel like KAI anymore. And that wouldn't work bc fans wanted gucci kai, not walmart kai. Also, his general personality quirks were just not the type that would vibe w Caroline. Chris Wood said it himself, "Kai likes to be the one who talks, he doesn't like to listen, so I think Caroline might make him wanna snap her neck & move on" bc Caroline ALSO likes to talk. So writing him w Care would change Kai too much & writing him w Elena was not an option bc Delena was set in stone & Nina was leaving. So, how'd plague have her cake & eat it too? She refused to let Bon have Kai, and bc there was no other white girl who made sense for him, she kept Kai eternally single so white fans could eternally imagine themselves w him.

And uk what's the worst part? I don't believe all white fans would've necessarily struggled to see themselves in Bonnie if she'd dated Kai. I think Bonnie being the ACTUAL underdog struggler of the show made her very relatable to people, regardless of what your race is (esp bc tvd rarely addressed her race or centered any plotlines on it). I think Plague's own subconscious biases just made it impossible for her to fathom seeing herself in a PoC character, which is why she wrongly assumed all her majority white fans worked the same way & letting Bonkai happen would've disappointed them & made them stop watching. (But that being said, even if it was just a "business decision" to her... isn't it funny how disappointing masses of white klaroline fans didn't stop her from tossing Care at stef, enzo, whoever she wanted, but ONLY stopped her when it came to Bonnie's ships (bc she was looking for excuses to scrap 'em anyway)? Oh plagueee ur biases are showing, girlieee)

[bonkai4ever94]

I might be the only one who feels this but I never cared if kai saw the twins or not unless it involved bonnie being loving to them with kai witnessing it I prefer kai actually being around liv and jo then just their replacements through jo kids and frankly I find the twins dryer then both jo and liv

[iknowshocker]

Anon from the last question here 🙋‍♀️ LOVED your answer and love a good Kai psychoanalysis 🙌

You mentioned it’s hc that 1994 Kai is virgin!kai, which got me thinking… did he ever really have any romantic or physical experiences? (Legacies Kai never happened in my mind 🥲)

And kind of on the same note, what do you think life was like for him when he was 18-22? It’s hc for me that he was homeschooled, but we don’t really know anything from the time he turned 18 until he was sent to a prison world

omg hi!! thank you for the question i've been having so much fun answering! i should have made a place to talk about my boy sooner, i could yap about him all day 😂

(oh man legacies kai my deeply insane beloved) he's really cracked out in those episodes but there are a few little moments where he feels like himself that i hold onto lol i just wish they hadn't put in his fling with the immortal teenager like he was 👉🏼👈🏼 close to being the only man to make it out of the TVDu without an inappropriate relationship i know there's an age gap with bonnie but it's simply not the same imo

okay here we go 18-22 kai:

so i assume, in the most affectionate way possible, that he gave off major JD from the heathers vibes. (the black cargo pants with the heavy ass combat boots?? he's a scary boy and he knows it lmao)

that age of young adulthood is such a volatile time, but for kai his resentments are growing, it's getting closer and closer to the merge, and if he can just wait it out a little longer everything is finally going to change. so lots of pent up energy, studying like crazy, in general running himself into the ground to insure everything goes the way he desperately needs it to. this also explains why he built up to such a violent snap. it's the one thing he's been holding on to, he was literally born for it, and then they still take it away.

those stupid christmas sweater photos make me think that everyone was living at home up until may 10th. unlike liv/luke i think joshua kept jo/kai close because he felt he needed to watch kai. i've always found it interesting that Jo goes into the medical field but Kai has the anatomy knowledge to cut out her spleen correctly lmao i hc they both had an interest in medicine, with him looking for a cure probably and jo maybe helping him at least at first. crazy to think that they probably would have still become a dr regardless of which one of them won the og merge!

anyway yes i think they were stuck living at home, with kai basically being held hostage and Jo being forced into a caretaker role since their mother died giving birth to the baby twins. (that's not like fully confirmed but the timeline works out so to me it's basically canon lol)

i mentioned kai having PTSD centered on touch and i think that would make any sort of social stuff hard for him. he's been taught to think he's dangerous and he's not been given any tools to keep from being that way. i hc most of his knowledge of his power came from trial and error, because joshua was like "alright no magic for you keep that in check demon spawn" from the time it manifested. (listen i could write dissertations on how despicable it is that they KNEW about gemini siphons and just refused to find ways to help him) that sort of fear/mistrust over his own abilities starting at such a young age would be totally crippling.

i read a fic once where he sleep siphoned Jo when they were young and nearly killed her during a nightmare. i could absolutely see things like that happening, and it leaving him terrified to do it again. but then his sociopathy developing would give him the ability to lash out without worrying about the guilt of his actions. but just because he doesn't let himself feel guilty doesn't mean he doesn't know what he did was wrong. i can imagine it would be so conflicting to need magic to work/feel normal but the only way to get it is to hurt the only people around you day to day. just a nightmare all around.

(have you seen the deleted scene with Jo/Kai? because that monologue from him lives rent free in my mind. the panicked breathing, the sad eyes, the desperation in his tone !! i just can't handle it lmao they 100% cut it because leaving it in and still killing him would have caused riots in the streets)

being homeschooled would limit the entire family's outside interactions, but i imagine they usually left kai at the house when they went out to the shops/coven gatherings/general outings. he does have basic people skills when we meet him so it's not like he's 100% ostracized but i do think a lot of his personality is him mimicking things he's seen in movies/mirroring the people around him in a given moment. he's faking it based off of what he thinks would be correct and when he gets it wrong you can see him deflate.

if he was allowed to go out growing up, i think he probably stuck to Jo and let her do the talking. so when she started pulling away from him too and he didn't have a buffer, it was probably easier to just stay home instead of risking it on his own.

i'm a person who hears his version of "they isolated me" and Jos "our parents saw him pulling away, isolating himself" and lands somewhere in the middle. i think they had rules over him not touching anyone/made it very clear he couldn't be trusted and that left kai feeling like "okay well f you guys i'll just go back to my room" it was just easier for him to go ahead and leave instead of let them bully him into leaving.

like he's the oldest, but do we think the other siblings listened to him ?? nah, man, there's simply no way. by the time they reached 22, no one in the house but liv/luke showed much interest in him. and he had to know that the older they got, they'd grow to believe joshua/fear him too. that had to be freaking exhausting, not to mention hurtful as hell.

(i mean... "When your family decides that you are nothing but an irredeemable piece of trash, well…I guess the best thing to do is prove them right, right?” like by the time we get to the red wedding, they broke him. there's no more second chances or trying again or believing they'll change. he's done. but he had to get pushed to that point and i think it was building his entire life.)

i hc as the oldest Jo/Kai shared a car, but to be so honest i always assumed he taught himself how to drive (fast lol) in the prison world. i would love to believe they snuck out to concerts together or had little adventures growing up but i think Jo turned on him somewhere around the time she realized she wasn't going to be allowed to go off to college. she would have had her own resentments around being stuck with him because of him, and so i don't see them having much of a relationship past the age of like 16.

to circle back to romantic relationships, i just don't think kai ever had an opportunity to be close enough to anyone for anything to happen romantically or even platonically pre prison world.

that's why bonnie showing up is such a big deal. she's this beautiful, funny, smart witch and she's just suddenly !! in his world !! the fact that he can't help getting close to her means everything to me. there's something about her/her magic that just tugs him in. "yeah but i wanted to feel your hand on my chest" come ON once you know the implications of that statement how do people not melt. babes is so touch starved he's dying for anyyyyoneeee to love on him.

bonkai sidenote: im a firm believer that grams was playing matchmaker. i hc she knew kai growing up and tried to help him when she could, which is why they went the prison world route instead of simply getting rid of him. without a bennett to bind the spell it wouldn't have been possible, so she agreed to keep something else from happening to him. she literally tells bonnie she gave up her peace so that bonnie could find hers, knowing 100% she was sending her to a world where kai was waiting/he couldn't be killed/and they would have to work together to escape. even more than that, damon wasn't supposed to go !!! so grams knew they'd be alone and either assumed bonnie could handle him or believed there was enough good in kai that it wouldn't go badly for bonnie or both lol we know from the jump that grams adores bonnie, there's not a chance in hell she would have sent her there if she thought for a second kai would hurt her. i just don't think she realized how sick he would become on his own, and adding damon into the mix changes the dynamics because kai is trying to come off stronger than he is.

yikes sorry i dont know how to discuss him without discussing bonnie 🙈

again thank you for your ask!!

[elejah-wonderland]

_elejah au

Love is in the Air

_tvd fanfic_Part 1

a/n: this is a light-hearted, romantic little story.

*

New Orleans

"I am all packed" Elijah said to his sister Rebekah on the phone.

"Why Rome?" the blonde asked.

"I just had this idea for my next book. And I need to go there to get the feel of the city, do some research at the archives." Elijah said.

"So, it's going to be another murder mystery with historical background?!" Rebekah stated.

"Burning Wings was such a great success and now they want me to write a sequel," Elijah said, "and a couple of nights ago I had a dream that kind of set this idea in my head to put the plot in Rome."

"Well, I hope it will not all be work- after your divorce you have done nothing but work."

"I plan to take time off and enjoy the city. Stefan is gone with Valerie to visit his brother and his wife Rosalie in Amesterdam and I got his apartment for a whole month." Elijah explained.

Rebekah sighed a little as her brother mentioned her ex-boyfriend Stefan Salvatore.

"I am sorry, I shouldn't have mentioned him."

"It's ok. I just- it will always be hard cuz- you know - I messed ut up and now- ok- right. When is your flight?" Rebekah asked.

"Tomorrow morning. I will call you when I get there." Elijah replied.

"All right. Have a great time. And try not to just work." Rebekah said and with a little bye and Elijah's promise that he will also take time to enjoy his holiday, they hung up.

Pressing the search button, the latest articles with the news popped up. And the picture of the woman he had met ten years ago as he visited his sister, who was studying in the prestige old private  Mystic Falls College for liberal arts, now stared at him.

His eyes smiled seeing the photo, which was clearly from one of her premieres as she was a famous actress.

And then he saw the article headline.

Elena Gilbert rumored to be secretly engaged to Mason Wood.

Elijah sighed a little and not reading further, swiped the page off and went to a subject he was interested in.

*

In Florence, Italy

Elena walked in her hotel room followed by her personal assistant  and manager, Jo Parker.

"Thank God today was the last day of the shoot. Can you please reschedule everything  for at least a week?!" Elena said."I am so going away and I don't want to know about anything. Please."

"All right. So, what shall I book you? Bali?"

"No. I already made my own arrangements." Elena said.

"What? I didn't want to ask - but - are you seeing  Mason again?" Jo asked.

"No. Well, we hooked up again- and that's all" Elena replied waving away with an insignificant huff.

"Right. Do you want me to say something about the non-engagement? It's all over the internet"

"No. Just leave it. It will blow over. Especially when they soon see him with Erin." Elena explained.

"Erin Lindsay? Seriously?" Jo now asked.

"A couple of days after our hook up I saw him with her all lovey at the same hotel." Elena said followed by a little sigh.

"Oh, sweety - you still thought that -"

"Yeah- I kind of thought that maybe the hook up would be - but things were over with us ages ago- I don't know why I  thought that there - and I am not even in love with him really - anyway, enough of it."

"Where are you going?" the manager asked.

"Rome." Elena replied.

"Rome?" Jo was surprised.

"Yes. And I am going incognito. I got Francesca's keys to her apartment. I need to get away from everything and everyone. Take a week off- maybe two." Elena replied.

"Ok. I have something for you to read. Liv is still negotiating to get the rights to do a movie, but it's nearly in the bag and Tristan is very interested in producing this," Jo now got a book out of her bag, adding,"it's a historical thriller and you would be playing Angel, she is a 15th century librarian, who investigates a murder involving an ancient curse. The book was No.1 everywhere!"

Elena took the book and looked at it, muttering,"Elijah Smith?" and then turned the book around. The face on the back now made her heart jump.

"Interested? The book is really good - there are so many twists and turns - I could not put it down till I finished it. There is a very ambiguous cliffhanger at the end - and apparently there is going to be Burning Wings 2- Elena?"

"Ha? What?" Elena now snapped out of her momentary daze.

"Interested?"

"Yeah" Elena said breathing in a gulp.

Jo smiled a little, gathering why Elena got a tad bit taken in.

"He is such an eye-candy, right?"

"Yeah" Elena said and put the book down on the table.

"What's up?"

"Nothing," Elena replied, "ahm- I want to go shower and I think I will hit the bed."

"All right. I will see you at breakfast? Shall I rent- a- car for you?"

"Yes, please. Thanks, Jo. Sorry, I am just so wasted."- Elena now said rubbing her neck a bit.

"I know. Don't worry. Ok. See you in the morning." Jo said and then taking her bag from the chair left the actress's room.

As the door clicked on the way out, Elena now shot a look at the book, flashing back to the past.

Flashback

Ten years back

"May I?" Elijah asked politely for the seat on the bench.

"Yes" Elena said removing the books so the man could sit down.

"Maybe it appears odd that I want to sit here though the other bench over there is empty, but it's too exposed on the sun and it's such a great shade here under this oak" Elijah said as he sat down.

"Yeah- it's crazy hot today," Elena replied,"and it's only May"

Elijah's eyes now descended on one of the books - "Roman Tragedy", and then a guide book on Rome. "Ah, Rome - such a great city."

Elena now swayed her look from her book she was reading.

"Have you been there?"

"Yes, last summer. With my sister Rebekah and my brother Kol." Elijah replied.

"Rebekah is your sister?"

"Yes. I am here to meet her. And she specificly said  - to be at the White Oak Tree. She is running late. You know her?" Elijah explained.

"We are in the play together." Elena replied.

"Oh, really? She didn't say anything about it. Is she any good?"

Elena nodded a little.

"Not that great, ha?"

"She is, and she could be excellent, but she seems not to care that much. Ok, I shouldn't  saybanything really."

"Oh, you're ok. She is my sister and I love her, but I know what she is like. She excels only at things she really is passionate about, and if she is not - well, she can be superficial."

"Yeah" Elena slipped.

"She wants to be a designer, she told me and I saw some of her designs - and they are amazing. Her show is the evening. But I guess, you know that?!" Elena said.

"Yes, that's why I am here." Elijah now said.

He then saw Rebekah approaching and he stood up. And just before he went to his sister, he turned to the brunette, introducing himself, "I'm Elijah."

"I'm Elena." the woman said.

_to be continued

[svu-bracket]

playoffs (round 1)

descriptions under the cut

dean winters -> appeared in 39 episodes across six seasons, including seasons 1, 13, 14, 15, 19 and 20. munch's original partner in season 1. down bad for liv since day 1 and eventually confesses to her she is the love of his life. they are fully dating in seasons 14 + 15 (they break up in fellow bracket player, meghann fahy's downloaded child!) but unfortunately, he does accidentally accuse olivia of child abuse in season 19. featured in one season 20 episode as a special victim.

sharon stone -> appeared in 4 episodes (torch, wannabe, ace, shattered) of season 11 as ADA jo marlowe, also elliot's former partner therefore olivia's natural enemy. i think if sharon stone were here right now the only thing she'd want me to say was that she hated it so bad.

[finnismyoriginalsin]

Just for funsies, as I'm totally a multishipper...

Canon wise, who I think the originals should've ended up with and who the tvd fam should've ended up with.

1. Obviously Finn/Sage

2. Freya/Vincent

3. Klaus/Caroline

4. Elijah/Katherine

5. Rebekah/Marcel

6. Kol/Davina

7. Bonnie/Enzo

8. Elena/Damon

9. Tyler/Liv

10. Jeremy/Anna

11. Stefan/Lexi

12. Alaric/Jo

13. Hayley/Jackson

14. Matt/Nadia

@sevensistersofsussex , @livlepretre , @kaizsche , @ryoryeonggu , @katherineholmes , @lovesomehate , @qvnthesia, @annabrainchase , @nymph-then-virgin

I'd love to know what ships you guys thought should be Canon in the end. 😊

[dodgebolts]

what's this? another friend has arrived, this one a pretty kitty! they'd like to know who some of your favorite bloggers are!

ok this one is going to not be comprehensive at all but I went and listed all of my mutuals and it looked like a massive wall of text so I picked out the people I interact with the most BUT I LOVE U ALL DEARLY

jo @tinynap, salty @toxicsapolo, blaze @sapnapgirlie, rey @vadergf, alexia @gogystyle, milky @honkkarl, phoenix @honktales, liv, @everybodywhamwham, aria @100blocks, cello @princeandreis, jenna @badboyslaylo, lucas @axolotldrevm, friday @georgeeehd, sally @gogienotfound, nick @dwttv, iny @sapybara, bella @calamitydaze and jules @gogtopia are some of my fav people to chat with, they're some of my oldest mutuals and I love them loads ^_^

and ofc I can't forget about my gnf and punz mains bc we are all holding hands ace @gnfcatcowboy, em @georgelore, basch @speedrunnercrafting, kit @kaustic, @rivalsjoy, leigh ann @prettygnf, miffy @gogciety, sage @powergnf, nyx @hashtagdnf, riv @gogchat, and claire @choconotfound <333

also my lovely dnf and general dteam posters, y'all make the dash such a fun place :D veri @tinamybeloved, celestial @sweetcelestialdreams, @georgenotfoundeyebags, rosie @ouchgnf, charlie @primeboysbffs, mandragora @minecraftdog, mar @patchesjam, nov @suenitos, cam @tooshisms, teana @patchesbeanie, kaya @dreamiara, meme @dnfblr, skeasy @dnfed, cliff @709-404, and lee @dreamhot!!

special shoutout to the two people who always entertain and level with me about my valo esports insaneisms @dnfingtons and @churchprime u guys are the real ones bc we all managed to flip over sen swapping marved and tenz on the roster today at different times LMAOOO

finally I don't think I can tag everyone here but everyone who I didn't mention above but I absolutely love seeing y'alls' art, fics, edits, gifs, or clips—you guys carry us whenever the boys are inactive and even moreso when they are active <33 ty for all u guys do -> demonstars, catsinstem, stonersap, respiteresponse, curoopeez, mahikamihan, traidyy, amethystcove, nervouswaltz, ourillusions, ourwaterfalls, sappymix1, yellumina, selvish, gologie, orkidays, fooshogie, milktea-green, carpedzem, tinogie, nonoqy, xomoosexo, urlwasfound, foolishhappy, bastardbvby, dreambaited

[howdywrites]

I have a character named Charlotte Marcam and I'm s t r u g g l i n g trying to name her kid. I wanted a name what could have a cute nickname. The kid is a 12-year-old lovable little shit, very independent and may or may not be willing to punch someone's lights out for someone she loves.

[so-long-soldier-writes]

I have no irl friends or mutuals who are Kai Stans so I figured I’d send you an ask about it because you’re my fave Kai account. I just rewatched that episode after the merge where Kai tried to kill Liv with that candle and couldn’t bring himself to do it and I have never felt so emotionally conflicted in my life. Like on one hand, bad Kai don’t murder people. But on the other hand, he looked so genuinely upset to be wrestling with his conflicting emotions and I just wanted to hug him

Okay, first of all, I'm honored to be your fave. I feel like I say this a lot, but I'm absolutely melting!🩷Hearing that people enjoy the things I write always makes me smile, and I think about those kinds of comments on the daily. Second, I rarely answer asks this quickly; I usually write out a response over a few days and edit it over a few more, but this got me so freaking excited because I JUST watched that episode and had the same feelies you're describing. Third, I will gladly be a mutual with you, whether you want to stay on anon or not! (I am so shy and weird irl, but I love talking to people on here, especially fellow Kai stans!!) (I don't talk to anyone irl about Kai, not even my mom who's watching tvd, bc I just KNOW she's gonna be like... you like this guy? 🤨 and i'll be awkwardly trying to defend him like he's not the love of my life. also, i love my mom and we're super close, but every time she watches an episode, she needs to remind me how much she loves matt donovan 😵‍💫)

But back to the point, yes, I literally watched that same episode / scene last night! And ugh, it gives me so many different feelings, too.

We really got to see the internal struggle he was having in that moment. Earlier, he had mentioned he was writing to Jo, and that he was crying, but in this scene, we actually got to see the emotions he may have been feeling while writing it. He was already exhausted and overwhelmed from trying to astral project into 1994 to help Bonnie, which is another huge display of emotion, and now he's facing his innate need to protect himself verses a whole new slew of feelings he doesn't understand.

On top of that, I don't think he actually wanted any of his siblings dead. I think he was just so void of emotion from all his trauma and abuse that he came to believe the only way to survive was if they were to die. He is, and always will be a sociopath; there's no way to unwire his brain, but Luke's emotions gave him all these feelings he hasn't felt in decades. Part of not wanting to kill Liv was definitely Luke preventing him, but I think part of it, too, was his own feelings.

Just thinking about it… sociopathy develops around the ages of 14-16; Kai is technically 40 years old. He was completely isolated for so long, and then thrust into this loud, complicated, modern world that he doesn't understand. He still has to fight to survive; his family still hates him 18 years later. When he finally accomplishes his "task" - to survive, his family hates him even more, and, since survival equals the merge, he now has feelings to battle on top of all these other new struggles.

Then in that scene, he's trying to make up for the hurt he put his sister (Jo) through, and then Bonnie. He offers empathy to Jeremy, helping him reach Bonnie even after Liv stabs him. He's a bit puzzled on what he should feel for Liv. At the moment, she's just in his way of accomplishing these other "tasks," but Luke won't let him hurt her, and he's fighting with himself about it. And that's a lot. Luke is overwhelming him; his own emotions are overwhelming him.

He needs a hug. And a nap. Both. Personally, I wanted to jump through the screen and give him a hug, then let him fall asleep while I held him and promised to keep him safe.

He's just begging for some kind of security throughout the season. He looks to Bonnie and Damon for it, hoping the three of them can escape the prison world together; hoping he can trust them; that they won't leave him there any longer. He looks for it by merging, knowing if he wins, he secures his spot in the coven; he can't be killed. He tries to make amends with Damon, helping him find his mom, and Bonnie, trying to apologize. Even Jo; he feels sick and he goes to his sister, who's a doctor, because she knows her trade; she can help him; provide him with some clue of what's going on, because he doesn't understand. He doesn't want to be left behind on his own again. He wants someone to trust him, and trust that he's trying to be better. But that's exactly what happens when he's trapped in 1903, and then, of course, he snaps again, because he realizes no one is going to change their minds about him, and no one is going to offer the basic human needs he so desperately has wanted for decades.

If someone just gave him a freaking hug and a second chance, things would've went a lot differently for everyone involved.

It's their own fault, honestly, that the season ended the way it did, (speaking, of course, as if the writers were not writing, and that the characters chose the course of the story). Kai, I believe, is extremely intelligent, and knew exactly how to hurt every single person who directly or indirectly hurt him. He found a little bit of security in Lily Salvatore - all he really wanted - and with that little boost of confidence from the wrong person, was able to deliver absolute chaos and destruction where he deemed necessary.

But now, on a completely unrelated note, I also have three random things to say about this scene. Given the chance to talk about it, I feel I must. One, I find it absolutely hilarious how Kai and Liv throw silverware at each other almost every time they fight. The camera pans to a fork or a knife, and suddenly, it's in the other's neck. Makes me wonder how family dinners went in that household. 😅 Two, when he was pouring alcohol on her, all I could think was damn, he's just gonna set that whole mansion on fire and everyone in it. That huge, expensive, historic, mansion, just to burn one girl. Three, I also couldn't stop looking at that sadistic smile. How happy he seemed to get over the "prospect of getting to watch someone burn to death," right before he couldn't bring himself to do it. His dark eyes do something to me. And the fact that he was already covered in his own sweat and tears from, again, over-exhaustion, just had me watching with absolute heart eyes. Maybe I should go to therapy.

But yes, I feel the conflicting emotions. I really wanted him to not kill her, because I didn't want him to prove them all right. I really wanted him to be redeemed because he deserved it so much. But at the same time….. he just looked so hot doing it.

[so-long-soldier28]

Idk if anyone's ever asked u this but what would ur life in tvd be like?! Including ur family ,career, friends, species etc lmao

oh ho ho, so this is certainly a thing i've considered

as someone who maladaptive daydreams all day long (whenever i'm not writing basically), trust me when i say i have an entire life planned out

in fact, the things i write frequently represent these daydreams, except i have an OC for them, whereas for writing, i am committed to the 'x reader' way

✨ including my readers in my world of delusion & fantasy ✨

but onwards and upwards…

species

first, I feel like being a heretic would be so fucking cool

like… vampire with witch powers, c'mon now… being the underdog your whole life and then rising to be the most powerful, it's gotta be redeeming

plus seems so fun

but personally, I think I'd stick to being just a witch, and I have a solid reason for this

now, being a vampire would be cool, too (and honestly I need to write more vampire reader fics), because I absolutely love the bloodthirsty, badassery of vampires

so if not a witch (bc I love the thought of being able to do magic), I would go with vamp second

I still hate the TVDU wolves. literally all of them. as someone who watches Teen Wolf now, I would LOVE to be one of those wolves, but as for TVDU, I still HATE those guys

being a hybrid doesn't sound too bad, although then both Klaus and Tyler would be all up in my business all the time, and that sounds awful

so no wolfishness for me

for species, I'd be a witch, but then I get turned into a vampire in my mid-20s

career

I need to eat, so I need to work

idk how anybody except Matt got by without a job

and like Matt, I work at the Mystic Grill, but I'm a little older than them, so I can bartend (even tho underage Matt does too)

I was going to Whitmore College, but dropped out (like I did lmao)

friends

Mystic Falls gang but in varying degrees of friendliness

most with Caroline, loving her bubbly personality; drift away from Elena when she gets tied up with the Salvatores; drift from Bonnie when she starts dating Jeremy, then drift further after the Kai debacle

also, the Originals

Kol has the title of the best friend; Bex is close, too

sometimes I'm so much of a Kolvina shipper that I can't split Kol & Davina apart, even tho I'm in love with Kol, too

Klaus is a frenemy; I like him when he's not murderous. he can be loyal when he wants to be, same with Elijah.

in fact, I liked Elijah in s2-era, but was also a little afraid. my crush fizzled out the moment I saw Kol, but then she & him became good friends instead (with both)

hooked up with Kol once or twice when he still lived in MF

friendly with Jo, but she's not really having it once I get with Kai

same with Luke and Liv... friendly, but Liv hates me after the merge

circa-season 7, I want to be friends with Nora & Mary Louise, but the MF gang works hard at keeping me away from them

amidst the chaos, I manage to get my way and befriend them anyway, earning their trust by being so close to Kai

when I die, I'm given blood by Nora, like in the fic I wrote recently, or Damon, who likes me enough to keep me alive and knows Kai would slaughter him if he ever came back and found out

seasons 7-8, I'm very much teaming on both sides, friends with MF gang and heretics, which is frustrating to MF gang (minus Caroline, who has become somewhat reliant on heretics for help with her pregnancy. + she always understands me anyway.)

frenemies

Tyler and Matt get their own category, bc I don't hate them, but they certainly piss me off

Tyler's just annoying in general, and I hate how he treats Caroline while he's away hybrid-ing

he gets better in s6 when he's trying to impress Liv & Caroline is over him. still not a friend, but less of an enemy

Matt, on the other hand, is complicated

he was my way into the supernatural bc we worked together

he had trouble keeping it from me bc vampires would always show up at the grill, and one time, he forgot I wasn't in the circle and ranted about vamps and wolves before he remembered

he and the gang still try to keep me out of it, despite my knowledge

but that all fails when Kol is undaggered, finds me alone, and we become friends

the fact that he actively hates vampires while hooking up with Rebekah bothers me, which causes tension between us

but he's stronger than he looks and loyal if he trusts you, so I try to keep him on my good side

family

my TVDU OC is the same OC I've had since I was 13 that I've slightly adapted for different fandoms

in TVDU, my parents are divorced; mom moved away, and toxic dad lives about 2 hours away while I'm in college

I hide whenever he comes to MF to visit

occasionally, my parents are dead like everyone else's

sometimes, though, I'm the older sister of other characters, but that varies per daydream

sometimes, I'm Tyler's older sister who is actually a wolf

triggered my curse young in life by accident, but didn't tell Tyler until he had triggered his own

sometimes, I'm even Matt's older sister, and he still spends every waking minute trying to keep me out of the supernatural

I've also used the Salvatore sister storyline with Kol, and Gilbert cousin one for both Kol and Kai

dating life

Kai, ofc

MF gang tried sooo hard to us apart, especially bc I'm a witch, but they lost that battle quickly

couldn't keep me from work, so whenever he'd come in for a drink and I was bartending, we'd talk

gained his trust through listening & he gained mine when I let him siphon

Matt and Damon first to realize we're friends, and know there's nothing they can do

fall into a relationship quickly

either beg Damon to spare him at the end of s6, or beg for his life in s8

had a crush on s2-era Elijah, but did a 180* and fell for Kol instead when he was undaggered

used as Kol bait when Caroline was Klaus bait, but despite a few hook-ups, never actually dated

became close friends & adore his relationship with Davina in NOLA

visit him there or wherever he is every so often

[I honestly never built a solid storyline around being with Kol or Elijah. (Elijah was my first favorite ever, and Kol's my second fave now next to Kai.) I entertain a world of delulu with Kol sometimes, but it lacks foundation.]

basically, he never died (obvs) and I move to NOLA with him (and he never dies there, too)

but I love both witch & vamp Kols, and both their actors, and I really should dedicate more time to delulu daydreams with them 😅

so, now that I've rambled...

species: witch, until Kai's death, then i become a vampire. however, if Kai doesn't die after s6, neither of us turn. (sometimes I'm feelin' heretic-y, sometimes not, what can I say?)

career: working at Mystic Grill; at Whitmore College for two years, but dropped out

friends: Caroline, Bonnie, & Elena first. Stefan & Damon post season 1 when Damon mellows out and I learn to trust Stefan. Kol & Rebekah, and I'm okay with the rest eventually (minus Finn).

family: divorced parents; mom moved and I stay away from my dad

frenemies: Matt & Tyler. s2 Klaus & Elijah. Finn, because I know he was mistreated by Klaus, much like Kol, and I want to be friends, but then he tries to kill his whole family, so I don't feel bad anymore. Then when Finn killed Kol in NOLA, he became a straight-up enemy. Also, I tolerate Alaric, but he annoys me daily in s6-8-era.

~~~

If anyone outside of this site read a single one of these sentences, I would be committed. I love fandoms / fanfiction, because all this stuff is perfectly normal to us. I love us as a community. Anyway, this was super fun to answer! 🥰 I'm sorry it took me so long!

[yellowjacketslesbian]

About Me

hey y’all! I figured it was time to finally make an intro post since I’ll be on here more often.

basic info:

nonbinary butch lesbian

they/them

late-20s

white

taurus ♉️

you may know me from twitter (VanistheOGlhb) where I can usually be found suffering from taivan brainrot, yelling into the void about how much I love Van Palmer, talking how much I love fictional butch lesbians, and going absolutely feral over any crumb of butch4butch in media. or, you may have read one of my taivan fics on ao3 (Van_Palmer_is_the_OG_lhb).

I’m mainly here for yellowjackets, taivan, and van palmer, but I’ll occasionally blog about other ships, characters, fandoms, and interests as well.

like:

all things liv hewson

aloto (jesslupe)

bly manor (damie)

butch4butch media (blue jean, etc.)

lesbian cinema

boygenius

hozier

all things butch

(I included more fandoms and interests in the “read more” section at the end of the post)

yellowjackets info:

faves: van, taissa, lottie, & nat

fave episodes: S1E7, S2E1, S1E9, S2E8, S2E5

main ship: taivan

side ships: parkinglot, lottai, parkinglottai, lottienat, mistynat, shaunanat

rare pairs: tainat, vannat

I’m a taivan endgame shipper

I personally believe taissa, van, and lottie will all survive through the series finale

I headcanon van as nonbinary (if you don’t hc it, that’s cool, but please be respectful of my and other people’s right to hc & write it)

I’m very protective of both van & taissa

I’m very protective of van’s canon butch identity

I joined the fandom on twitter in august 2022

fictional characters I relate to a bit too much:

Van Palmer (this one should be obvious)

Finley (tlw: genq)

Jo March (forever a nonbinary lesbian in my heart)

Kat Stratford (10 things I hate about you)

links:

ao3

twitter

instagram

letterboxd

serializd

more fandoms & interests

fave ships:

taivan

mariejordan (gen v)

damie (bly manor)

jesslupe (aloto)

jean/viv (blue jean)

emisue (dickinson)

kelly/yorkie (black mirror)

alice/dana (tlw)

alice/tasha (tlw)

raylla (mfs)

alex/steph (LiS: true colors)

pricefield (LiS)

deena/sam (fear street)

fave tv shows:

yellowjackets

black mirror (pre-S5 mainly)

bly manor

haunting of hill house

dickinson

a league of their own

the l word

tlw: genq (rip)

gilmore girls

feel good

fave movies:

blue jean (2022)

but I’m a cheerleader (1999)

jennifer’s body (2009)

10 things I hate about you (1999)

the incredibly true adventures of two girls in love (1995)

little women (2019)

the witch (2015)

bound (1996)

scream franchise

fear street trilogy (2021)

portrait of a lady on fire (2019)

across the universe (2007)

music:

boygenius

hozier

sleater-kinney

wallows

clairo

cage the elephant

pvris

tegan & sara

muna

mitski

the killers

smashing pumpkins

the cranberries

fletcher

yeah yeah yeahs

rina sawayama

radiohead

nirvana

[leianaberrie]

You know I don’t even like “redeeming villains” tropes that much cause shows like TVD don’t even do it right. Their idea of redeeming a bad guy is so gross. It’s just having the other characters act dumb and excuse their actions. Like Elena and later Bonnie and Caroline excusing and downplaying Damon or just downright not even acknowledging shit he did (like in S5 how Damon kidnapping Jer was literally never acknowledged by Elena). And Caroline romanticizing Klaus. I know the fandom tries to act like she didn’t but she did. Which is why after he stabbed her and poisoned her with his werewolf venom she goes “I know you’re in love with me and anyone capable of love is capable of saving.” And Damon gets told “you feel remorse cause you made pancakes in memory of the pregnant woman you murdered so there’s hope for you.” So it’s just all so icky the way the narrative and characters are written so the audience could be tricked into thinking this is “redemption”.

But with Kai the redemption arc was the only time they were doing it right.

He pays actual consequences for his actions.

Nobody excuses or downplays his behavior.

People get even with him (i.e Jo and Bonnie trapping him in 1994/1903 prisons.)

After the merge he was genuinely feeling bad about the trauma he caused Jo and Bonnie. They literally dedicated multiple episodes to highlighting Kai’s remorse and feelings (6x13, 6x15, 6x16, 6x17). Btw those were Kai’s feelings not Luke. Luke didn’t grow up with Jo and didn’t care about Bonnie. And those were the two people Kai’s feelings centered around. Had Kai been obsessed with chasing Liv and getting her to forgive him for trying to kill her when she was toddler then I’d maybe agree that that’s Luke’s emotions taking over. But Kai wrote a letter to Jo in 6x13.

So it’s just so annoying that the one villain redemption arc they were doing right is the one they decided to toss.

🙄😒

So much this! The one time they're writing the redemption properly, that's when they decide that they want to make an example.

And I completely agree about Luke and it annoys me so much when people attribute Kai's feelings to Luke. Kai got empathy, not Luke's personality. Luke did not care about Bonnie, ffs. He made Liv stop the spell to bring people from the Other Side. He might feel sad about Bonnie's attempt to take her life but he would never risk his life and the life of the coven to save her.

[countrymusiclover]

34 - We All Have Darkness

Part 35

Family is More than Blood

@secretdreamlandmentality

Klaus parked the car outside Whittemore hospital coming around and holding open the car door for me. Gripping his forearm under my nails I stood up on my own against his protests to carry me through the hospital instead. We had both agreed it was best I get the babies checked out. “Thanks for agreeing to do this, Jo.”

“Don’t thank me. We’re family, Rae.” She says moving around the hospital room. Klaus was guarding the locked door seeing as we didn’t need anyone hearing something strange.

Laying against the pillows on the bed I gripped the blanket in between my fingers hearing Jo’s heartbeat in my ears. I bite my lip, feeling the fangs fighting to break through my gums. “Hey Klaus, can you get me a drink?”

“I can get it for you.” Jo suggested getting the altar sound machine prepared.

Holding my mouth closed my eyes focused on her neck feeling like I could see every time her blood moved throughout her body. “Um…not a normal drink Jo.”

“Newly turned vampire.” Klaus nodded exiting the room leaving us alone. “I’ll be back.”

Jo stood at my bedside grabbing the gel and spreading it across my bare stomach. “So how does it feel having your own magic this way now?”

“Weird but not as weird as carrying three miracle babies of your hybrid boyfriend.” I chuckled lightly, still processing everything very slowly.

She smiled, grabbing the cold scan device. “You’re talking to an ex witch, remember. I think our whole lives can be nothing but weird. Now let’s see here, there they are.”

“How are they?” I asked her to train my neck over my shoulder to see three little figures appear on the screen beside me. One heartbeat right after the other.

Jo glanced down at me. “They are perfectly fine according to this. Good heart beats and all. Hey, are you okay?”

“Uh sort of. I've just been worried lately. After I turned…the veins disappeared. Bonnie said the only reason they survived is because of the dark magic.” She noticed I was scratching at my arm where the black veins of dark magic used to be until I turned a few weeks ago.

The doctor before me did her best to be up to date on the current situation of my life. Considering she was the only member of our messed up family that I actually liked besides Luke and Liv. “Look I'm no expert on black magic but I'd say it's better to have it gone than to be killing you from the inside out. And I'm not just saying that because your lifespan is literally keeping me alive.”

“That's for certain one thing I'm going to fix once the babies are born. Change that ridiculous Coven rule once and for all.” I waved my hand at her.

She laid down her tools and removed the stethoscope from around her neck. “Look if you're so concerned about their safety you could always put your magic away like I did.”

“I don't think that’s a good idea just yet. Until I'm certain it's what is keeping them safe. I have to keep my magic with me.” I responded to her hearing footsteps coming down the hallway revealing my fiance.

Klaus came around the other side of the bed tearing open the blood bag giving it to me. “So how are you and our children doing?”

“Everything seems to be going fine according to my favorite doctor…oh I love you.” I began sucking down the contents in the bag making Klaus chuckle.

He sent her a small head nod. “Thank you, Josette.”

“I'd do anything for, Rae Rae.” She shrugged her shoulders looking at her watch. “Shoot, my lunch break is almost over. I have to go but just remember that you should be fine Raelyn.”

I smiled, finishing the blood bag laying it in my lap. “Thanks, Jo. There's a reason you’re my favorite cousin.”

“You're my favorite person too. And you'll be a great mother no doubt.” She peaked her head throwing the door one last time before leaving us alone.

The first thing I did when I started waking up was turn my hands into fists at my sides. Peaking one eye open I saw I was back laying down in the bedroom. Moving my head around the room it was still our bedroom but I didn't see any signs of my uncle Joshua at the moment. “Maybe he's gone for good this time.” I mumbled to myself slowly sitting up with my legs bent down underneath me.

“I wouldn't be so sure of that, little niece.” Whipping my head to the corner of the room I saw him standing there so clearly.

Scooting up against the headboard as much as possible I panic. “What do you want from me? You're dead and at peace. Just leave me alone.”

“I am trying to help you, Rae. I wouldn't be here if your kids weren't in danger.” He said back.

Clutching the fabric of the bedsheets in my hands. “They're still just babies. They can't merge even if I want them to.”

“If you won’t listen to me and stop letting the darkness be held back then maybe you'll listen to someone else….” Joshua stood at the edge of the bed allowing me to see him transform into my crazy dead cousin Kai.

Crossing my arms over my chest I huffed. “Real original, Hollow. You think he will convince me to let the darkness take over.”

“I can be very convincing, little cuz. Besides, I know exactly who you are. You and I are very similar judged for what we were born with-”

Slamming my hands down onto the side of the bed the room started shaking. My fangs came popping out when I felt anger building up inside of me. I was beginning to get frustrated with all these mind games. If the Hollow or whatever was inside my head had something to say they should just get on with it. “We are not similar. Just tell me what the hell you want from me!”

“I want you to get me more power. I can feel it all through this place and you are doing nothing about it.” Kai declared to me with a smirk on his face.

Closing my eyes shut I sighed knowing that he was or she was right. Even though I was at the Mikaelson mansion we had a lot of magic running through this house. My hands turned red gripping the bed sheets entering my bloodstream to provide me with magic. “Show yourself now!” The lights and objects in the room either flicker or get thrown up in the air.

I couldn't hear anything else happening in the room so I peaked one eye open seeing the figure of Kai close his eyes and hold his arms away from his sides before a bright glow took over his body. Once the brightness disappeared I opened my eyes all the way to see a mirror image of myself. The figure of me had my hair loose but the ends were dead in black. The rest of my clothing was almost all black too. “The Hollow isn't fully gone. Her power and soul is now inside you.”

“You’re me…what do you want?” I blinked my eyes a couple of times feeling my mind was betraying me.

The dark version of me smirked. “I want you to stop hiding behind this weaker version of yourself. You’ve proven that you are stronger than anyone thought you’d be. Stop hiding who you truly are.”

“That’s what this is truly about. You want me to be a bad person after I’ve told my kids to not appear as monsters.” I bite my tongue at the thought. The whole idea behind the Salvatore school was to help these kids be comfortable and not afraid of who they are.

Dark Raelyn flipped her hair at me. “Just consider how much more Klaus would love you if you let him see the darker parts of you.”

“I don’t have much darkness in me that he doesn’t already know about.” I got to my feet moving to stand in front of my subconscious self.

She tilted her head to the side. “I’ll make you a deal and since I am you you’ll have no choice but to accept.”

“What kind of deal?” I asked her.

The other me smirked wickedly. “You take all the magic you can find for yourself. Then just let it control you. Be the siphoner that you were meant to be.”

“What’s the catch if I don’t do what me - uh you want?” I shake my head, getting confused over my own words.

“Simple I’ll keep driving you insane with visions created by the Hollow’s magic for the rest of your life. So an eternity of misery can be in your future.”

Clutching my hands into fists I sighed in defeat right as the subconscious self disappeared before me. I changed into a white sweater, dark blue jeans and some short ugg boots. Tying my hair up into a ponytail I made my way straight to the Salvatore school hearing the bustle of people walking around. “Raelyn, what are you doing out of bed?”

“Just needed some air. I’m fine now. The vision disappeared.” Whipping my head around I saw my husband Klaus come from Alaric’s old office that we had taken over.

He nodded, tilting his head. “Well that’s great. Do you need me to get you anything?”

“Actually there is one thing. Can you gather all the students here? I just want to confirm and explain to everybody what has happened the past few days. Since we’ve had some issues…especially with just our family alone.” Clasping my hands together I suggest to him.

Klaus raised a brow but agreed wanting to help me out in whatever way he could. “Of course. I’ll be back, heretic queen.”

“Great…remember our deal.” I muttered once he vamped away seeing my evil subconscious leaning in the doorway pointing her index finger at me silently. It didn’t take him so long before all the students were gathered in the main entrance of the school. “I just wanted to explain something. Things have been crazy and I’m sorry about this…imperium monstrum.”

Henrik was standing by his friend Pedro asking me curiosity. “What are you doing, mommy?”

“I’m going to get dad - ugh.” Missy spun on her feet smacking into the barrier spell. A couple more people that were werewolves and vampires attempted to leave but had the same result meaning they couldn’t break through unless I let them out.

Closing my hands into fists I lowered myself down onto a knee and my hair fell over my shoulder. All the students eyed me confused and some were trying to help the other witches break them out of the barrier. “Take what you need, Raelyn.” Subconscious me whispers in my ear.

“Get out of my head and leave me alone if you want me to do this.” I snarled quietly placing my hands on the floor seeing my fingers turn red beginning to siphon the magic that was just inside the walls.

Somebody vamped into the room revealing my husband who smacked his hands against the barrier. His blue eyes focused on mine seeing the black veins on my arm crawling up higher. “Raelyn, what the hell are you doing?”

“What I have to do, Klaus…Immobilus.” I declare raising my hands out away from me blasting everyone inside the circle with a freezing spell.

Klaus bangs his hands on the barrier knowing that something was wrong with me. “Raelyn, this isn’t you. You don’t need to take all their magic from them.”

“Do it or I’ll never leave you alone.” Dark Raelyn growls in my ear.

Shutting my eyes tightly I revealed my fangs out from inside my mouth slamming my hands on the wooden floor needing to feel the magic in my blood. “Magia tollux de terras…Magia tollux de terras….Magia tollux de terras!”

“Raelyn!….Freya.” Klaus spun around on his feet hearing the main doors fling open. He slumped his shoulders in relief seeing his sister come into the school alongside two familiar witches.

“What are you letting her do, Klaus? There’s clearly something wrong with her right now.” Davina snapped at the hybrid.

Klaus raised his tone. “I don’t know. Just do something!”

“Sorry for this, Raelyn.” Valerie apologized in advance vamping behind me somehow breaking through the barrier and grabbing my head in her hands.

I tried to fight against her but her hands turned red siphoning my strength away from me. “Valerie, let me go…aaagh!” I moaned in pain collapsing to the wooden floor in front of the other heretic.

“Next time when I say I am a phone call away can it be for a less serious family reunion.” Freya snapped her fingers undoing the spell holding all of the students. Henrik, Andrea, Jackson, Alina, Missy and finally Hope all rushed over to her and Klaus needing an explanation as to what just happened.

Something was definitely wrong with Raelyn and they needed to find a solution to fix it.

Comments really appreciated ❤️