#(Either that or he really did turn evil again)

[vintagegeekculture]

Marvel's 1992 Darkhold Redeemers

“Darkhold Redeemers” was a comic created in 1992 about a group of supernatural investigators in possession of the Darkhold, an evil book of dark sorcery that has evil pages scattered over the world. In Marvel lore, the Darkhold is the book that created the first vampires. The comic was created by 90s Marvel journeyman Chris Cooper (also known for creating Starfleet Academy, a comic about the adventures of Cadet Nog that tied in to the events of Deep Space 9). 

The book is notable for three reasons. 

The first is that the premise is shockingly and coincidentally similar to the later Buffy the Vampire Slayer, with occult investigations carried out by a group that is led by a beautiful, tight outfit wearing vampire killer from a lineage of vampire hunters (Victoria Montesi, the Montesi Formula being the way vampires are destroyed in Marvel Comics), and also includes a mouthy scrappy everyman, an occult expert and archeologist who’s knowledge of the supernatural and collection of books leads to the secret of beating the creature of the week, a tough as nails government agent out of his depth when fighting the supernatural, and finally, a tremendously powerful and immortal dark antihero who joins the side of good despite his dark past (Mordred the Mystic is both Willow and Angel together, I suppose). 

The second detail is that it was the first Marvel Comic with an openly gay lead character. You might have heard it was Northstar, but this is not true. Chris Cooper is openly gay himself and always fought for inclusion of this nature. Victoria Montesi’s debut predates Northstar coming out of the closet (a comic, incidentally, that Chris Cooper wrote as associate editor on Alpha Flight, so he worked on both).

There are, likewise, many candidates for who the first gay character in Star Trek is, but one of the characters with the strongest claim to this title is Chris Cooper’s Yoshi Mishima in his Starfleet Academy series. 

Chris Cooper eventually left Marvel Comics after the 90s. Nothing happened. Most people in a freelance job like comic editing and writing are not Chris Claremont, who are there for decades. Careers in the arts don’t last forever, and they have to come to an end sometime, where you go and get a real job.

But Chris Cooper came up again decades later in the news, was the subject of an incident in 2020 when birdwatching in Central Park (he’d been a member of a birdwatching society at Harvard), where he was threatened by a female jogger, who said she would call the police as he threatened her, when we can see he did no such thing. The incident was known as either “the Central Park Birdwatching Incident” or the “Central Park Karen.” 

Looking at the footage now, it’s easy to see why it was national news and viral on the internet. Apart from the obvious racial angle, it is a chilling reminder of how a woman’s vulnerability can become a weapon, and how man’s strength can turn into a vulnerability. 

All the while watching the incident, I was like "...the Darkhold Redeemers guy? No, it couldn't be...it's probably a coincidence, Chris Cooper is a very common name." But nope, it really was the Starfleet Academy guy from the 90s.

Chris Cooper received a birdwatching show on National Geographic, and inspired many black people to go into birdwatching, but I could care less about birdwatching. I would like to see what happened next with Darkhold Redeemers and Starfleet Academy, which ended at a cliffhanger with a lot of unresolved plot points.

[bestworstcase]

the perennial Tai Discourse is really interesting to track bc, speaking broadly, the two major camps are just:

those who focus primarily on ruby’s recollection of her childhood and relationship with her dad (and filter what yang says through that lens such that “i had to pick up the pieces and keep things together when i was five” gets diluted into “yang had responsibilities as a child”)

those who focus primarily on yang’s memories and her arc in v4 (and tend to just ignore or minimize the things ruby says that suggest a positive relationship with tai, in particular often just flat out disregarding how excited ruby is to spend time with or receive care packages from him)

when it’s like. yeah that’s. literally the point. that ruby and yang had profoundly different childhoods.

they’re half-sisters in a story about fairytales and only one of them had a decent dad. rwby is unsubtly interrogating the fairytale archetype of the Evil Stepmother/Dead Mother with raven (not dead, but absent) and summer (villain, presumed dead) and that archetype quite literally requires its counterpart archetype of the Neglectful Father who remarries and tacitly participates in the Evil Stepmother’s abuse of his child from his first wife

tai is as much an exploration of the fairytale Neglectful Father as raven is the Dead Mom and summer is the Evil Stepmother. that’s. a core aspect of the narrative surrounding the rose xiao long family.

the Dead Mom often reincarnates as a bird or tree or similar spirit to watch over her child; rwby turns this on its head by reimagining the Dead Mom as an absent one. raven watches over yang in her bird form because she is too afraid to be meaningfully present; she isn’t dead, but her absence in yang’s life is so complete that she might as well have been, and the fairytale tension between the Dead Mom’s death and her lingering presence is explored through these cramped and inadequate half-measures raven takes in trying to have it both ways.

the Evil Stepmother is a vehicle for making the fairytale heroine miserable; she has no identity nor any reason for her monstrous treatment of the child who is not her own. rwby, again, flips this over with the mystery of summer rose. who was she, really? did anyone know? she was a good stepmom—she loved yang like her own daughter—but now she’s gone. she left. she never came back. she lied. she joined salem. why? what expectations did she feel on her shoulders? what broke her? why did she do the things she did?

lastly, the Neglectful Father must either be a love-blind fool or a weak, contemptible man with no love or loyalty to his own blood; he forgets his motherless child at the behest of his new love. rwby turns this on its head too by rendering tai as a human being—messy, flawed, fully-realized. wicked stepsisters exist for the purpose of being spoiled by the Evil Stepmother in juxtaposition with her cruelty to the first child, who is kind and good because she remembers her mother’s lessons. the fairytale children of these archetypes function as repetitions of their mothers. rwby makes that the central conceit of its spin on the Neglectful Father: what if he loved both the Dead Mom and the Evil Stepmother so much and then both of them broke his heart in mirrored ways, leaving him a single father to both of their children? if he sees raven in yang and summer in ruby, how does that color his relationships with both girls? if you take away the Evil Stepmother but not her daughter, does the Neglectful Father remember his first child? or are people more complicated than that?

and with all three, the narrative engages with these one-dimensional archetypes by constructing complicated, multi-faceted characters on top of them; by tossing the simplistic moral didacticism of a fairytale and presuming, first, that everyone is trying their best, that bad choices can be made from good intentions, and that no one gets it right all the time, or even most of the time. love and profound dysfunction can coexist.

ruby and yang had very different childhoods. that’s the narrative foundation the whole rose xiao long family is built on, because they’re a deconstruction of the archetypal fairytale blended family.

[gunilslaugh]

Not So Different

Oh Seungmin  Summary: No one understood villain Seungmin, except you. (non-idol au) WC:915 Warning:none

photo not mine credits to owner.

He was forced down onto his knees, arms tied behind his back. His lip was busted along with some other cuts and bruises on his face. Still he kept that arrogant smirk on his face. 

Oh Seungmin, who was probably the most feared person of the land. He was known for being a ruthless murderer. He essentially went around doing whatever he wanted. Now even after being caught for committing a heinous crime, slaughtering an entire village, he still carried his confidence as if nothing was wrong.

“Oh Seungmin you’re in for it this time,” the chevalier said.

“Oh, am I?” Seungmin provoked. 

“Why would murder an entire village?” the chevalier asked. Seungmin’s smirk grew. 

“Cause the village head took my toe,” he answered. 

“You’re toe? You did all this over a toe?” the chevalier questions in disbelief. “Couldn’t you have just killed the village head? Why kill everyone else too?” 

“Killing him wouldn’t have been enough,” Seungmin responded nonchalantly. 

“What?” the chevalier let out. 

“His toe is worth more than just the village head,” you finally spoke. The chevalier, who is also your friend, gave you a puzzled look. Seungmin turned his head to look at where you stood a couple feet away. 

You just so happened to be out with your friend. Helping him with some deliveries when you both ran into Seungmin. Things quickly escalated from there upon discovering the vile act he just committed. 

“To him his toe was worth an entire village,” you explained further. Seungmin looks at you with interest to which your chevalier friend didn’t like at all. 

“Don’t look at them.” He forcefully grabbed Seungmin’s chin and turned his head away from you. 

“But the way they look at me is interesting and they’re pretty too.” He shifts his eyes to look at you again. 

Just then other chevaliers arrived to take Seungmin away. They wasted no time in dragging him away to bring him to the prison. As Seungmin is being dragged away past you he shoots you a smirk. You only stare at him blankly.

“I told you to let me handle it. Why did you speak to him?” your friend comes over to scold you. 

“I didn’t talk to him. I was just explaining,” you defended. 

“He doesn’t need someone to explain for him. He’s a monster,” your friend raised his voice. 

“I know.” You raised your voice to match his. “I know what he is. I’m in no way trying to defend him or his evil acts. I just get why he did them. Understanding him isn’t defending him. I think murdering an entire village over a toe is crazy too, ok? Is that what you need to hear?” After hearing your cold tone your friend sighs. 

“I didn’t mean to scold you. I’m sorry. It’s just I really didn’t like the way he looked at you. I don’t want him anywhere near you. It scares me. I don’t know what I would do if you got hurt, especially because of him.” 

“I get it. I’m sorry for butting in,” you apologize.

“Let’s head home,” he says, starting to walk, you follow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was easy for Seungmin to escape from the prison. He’s done it before, multiple times, so it wasn’t any surprise when you heard word of his escape. What was a surprise was when you were out sitting on the wooden steps in front of your small house and Seungmin came and took a seat next to you. 

“Why are you here?” you asked. 

“I was just passing by,” he answered. 

“And you didn’t keep walking because?” You gestured with your hands, moving them from left to right. 

“I wanted to talk to you.” His tone of voice is almost too casual. 

“About what?” you say. 

“You don’t look at me like I’m a monster. Why?” he questioned. 

“Cause I understand you,” you replied. 

“Nobody else cares to,” he states.

“I’m aware. Is that all?” you check.

“No, there’s something I want to know,” he said. 

“What?”

“You don’t seem scared of me either,” he says. 

“I guess I’m not,” you tell. 

“Why? I could easily kill you right now.” He arched his brow. 

“I haven’t wronged you, so you won’t.” You arched your brow back at him and he smirks. 

“Plenty of people in that village were innocent, but I still killed them,” he points. 

“In a general sense yes they were. Which is what makes giving you the title of a monster easy, but they loved their village head. They viewed him very highly and he wronged you, so by some twisted association you thought they deserved to die too,” you answered. 

“Your little chevalier friend is the reason I went to prison, so by twisted association I could kill you too,” he justified menacingly, leaning in closer to you. Making fear spike in your veins. 

“Will you?” you asked. 

“No.” He leaned away from you. “Only cause I find you interesting.” 

“Guess I’m lucky then,” you state. Seungmin standing up from the wooden stairs. They creak as the weight leaves them. He wipes his hands on his pants. 

“You’re leaving?” you asked. “Like I said I was only passing by. I’ll see you around.” With that he walks away not even giving you time to respond. I’ll see you around his words repeated in your head. Certainly that couldn’t be good, however you think you might be looking forward to it. Maybe you were crazy like him too.

Taglist: @purplelady85 @gingerjunhan @chewednails @ezlynkisses @mon2sunjinsuver @mxlly143

[bet-on-me-13]

Dan is Trigon

So! The Teen Titans had been chasing down a Cult lately, and they had finally managed to track down their main bases location.

Unfortunately, they got there just a bit too late and the Summoning Ritual they had been preforming was finished. The Being they had been calling crawled up and out of the Circle drawn in Blood on the floor.

And Raven felt her heart Stop. Because that Being crawling it's way out of the Summoning Circle looked almost exactly like her Father's True Form. But also different.

Where her Father's hair was a White Flame, this one's hair looked like Freshly Fallen Snow. Instead of her Father's Blood Red Skin, this being had Icy Blue Skin. And most strikingly, In place of her Father's Piercing Red Eyes, this being had Lazarus Green Eyes.

But even with all those changes, she could still the similarities in the Bone Structure, the shape of the Jaw, and most importantly the Untold Power radiating off of them.

Before they could react, the Being turned its attention to the Cultists.

"Who Dares Summon, the Ghost King?"

"We do, Out Lord Pariah Dark! We Beseech Thee, take this unclean world and tear it down! Cleanse the World of its Filth!"

"Oh Goddammit, not again." Said the Being, "Look, Pariah hasn't been in Power for Centuries. I, am Phantom. And I don't do the whole 'Destroy all Worlds' thing, you want your own constellation? I'm your guy. Otherwise? Bite it."

"Bu-But my Lord! We summoned you to-"

"Yeah how about no." Said the unimpressed God, "Here, let me send you guys Home. I'll give you guys some riches or something as compensation, but that's it."

And with that, the God snapped its fingers and the cultists disappeared.

"Now, who are you kids?" He turned to them.

Robin stepped forward, "We are the Teen Titans, and originally we came to stop them from Summoning you. Now, I honestly don't know what to do..."

"Oh, you guys are Heroes! That's interesting, I don't come across worlds with Heroes very often." Said the Ghost King, "The last one was the one with those Revengers or whatever they called themselves. The Spider Totem was fun to talk to, and Thor is always..."

As Phantom mumbled to himself, Raven stepped up. "King Phantom, I have a Question. Why do you resemble the true form or Trigon so closely? As his Daughter, I can recognize your similarities easily, and I was curious."

The King stopped dead.

"...daughter?"

"Oh, yes. Trigon is my father, though obviously I haven't talked to him recently." She explained.

"...that asshole." He said, "How could he not tell me I had a NIECE!?"

Wait what?

[calamitydaze]

long tag ramble below u have been warned

[hgduo]

k!Luzu is both the most tragic little man who gives me constant pain and grief but also a total loser who I want to bully /lovingly

[loaksbitch]

the long awaited part two is here! — imagine neteyam is now suffering from his own actions, everything turning to a hell for him, he’s even distant to his family… and you? you’ve decide this is enough and feel like you don’t belong here so you tell neteyam you’re leaving the clan soon and neteyam feels like salt is added to his open wound when he hears about that.

warning – neteyam cries 2.0 (i’m evil, i know) angst angst angst! mention of y/n’s adoptive mom, nete kinda slips from his own body and loses control, nete stills cause oc with pet names :(, vulgar language, did i mention its angst? yeah maybe i did but again we have ANGST!! 3.1k wc.

“i can’t trust you” — neteyam sully (★,꩜)

part (one) – (three) — (four) of this series.

right after you left the love of your life, where you gave yourself to him, you couldn’t stop crying mess.

rage, confusion and pain blinding your eyes you didn’t care how the na’vi gave you glances every time you passed them without greetings given back.

you’re now in front of your mother’s shelter and swallow the lump on your throat not wanting her to see you like that. you push yourself inside and turn your face to the side so she won’t notice your puffy eyes.

“hi ma,” you greet her and her ears instantly perk up at your warm tone. “my sweet child, you cam– what’s wrong?” she knew you like no one did, you adoptive mother read you like a book.

when she finally asks what’s wrong you instantly breakdown in front of her, “mama.” you cry as the na’vi stumbles to you hurriedly, “what is it baby? what’s wrong?” she keeps wiping the tears that fall

this felt like the first time she found you lost in the woods, right after your biological mom abandoned you.

crying, scared and open.

“it hurts, make it stop ma, please make it stop.” your chest heaves up and down. your mother instantly knew something happened between you and neteyam, of course she’d know about the two of you.

“he…” you can’t even finish the sentence, “lied, he lied.” you struggled and your mother sighs

“oh my baby,” she pulls you for a hug and you hide your face into the crook of her neck crying again. no matter how she tighten her hold on your violently trembling body, she couldn’t stop the shattering feeling of your heart

you stood there hugged and vulnerable, seeking for comfort from your mother.

then there’s neteyam, who got to deal with the pain he created alone and secretly, he didn’t even get the chance to cry or comfort himself.

your words echoing in his drained mind, neteyam climbs back to his hammock. “i. hate. you.” those three words were enough to convince him you really do hate him. neteyam lied to you and you hated being lied, he knew everyone from your childhood lied to you

he knew it took you so much of sacrifice to give him a chance, he knew yet he destroyed you, he destroyed your heart. he can never forgive himself for that and he doesn’t want you to forgive him either.

neteyam chooses to suffer double than watch you break like that? he actually wishes you’d kill him right now but then again he deserves to live with this pain.

“i’m sorry.” he whispers as if you’re next to him and hearing him apologize. neteyam leans on the tree that’s helping the hammock stand in the middle of his room and slowly slides down to sit on the mat

“i’m so sorry, princess.” he knew you’ll never let him in again.

neteyam brings his legs to his chest and puts his arms on his knees before using them to lay his head. silent yet deep sobs left his lips as his chest tightened.

how was he supposed to live without you? without your skin against his? without your scent in him, without your smile to start his day… most importantly, without your love.

and now that neteyam have came to realize that, the perfect little solider has finally became defeated.

“i’m sorry.” he kept apologizing as he drifted to sleep, his beautiful face stained with tears.

and now five days passed, neteyam became distant with his family. no more breakfast eating with them, no more tuk and him moment, no more staying up all night with lo’ak and kiri to cause trouble.

no more in love with everything and colorful neteyam.

and his mother didn’t fail to notice him, notice how his behavior has changed. “something’s wrong with our son, ma jake, there’s something so wrong.” jake hums thinking neteyam is just getting more and more stronger and only practicing

“he’s just focusing on himself and training my love, you don’t have to worry.” jake says as he sharpens his weapons for the next war party

“no, you don’t understand” neytiri places her hand on jakes shoulder worriedly as their son kept himself inside his hammock, not wanting to interact with anyone of them. “he barely eats and drinks, barely plays with tuk she even started to ask for him.”

neytiri continued, “all he does is spend time on training, overworks himself and sneaks inside at midnight thinking i wouldn’t notice.”

jake frowns, this was new.

“neteyam started sneaking?” jake’s surprised tone makes netyiri sigh. he’s not taking things serious. “ma jake.” she warns when he tries to joke with a “neteyam’s finally being a spoiled brat huh?”

“okay okay, sorry but i’ll talk to him” jake cups his mates face and smiles, “maybe he’s having a hard time with being the future leader of the clan,” jake sighs “or maybe his new mate? he’s trying build some muscle, baby, don’t overthink it.”

neytiri only closes her eyes as they’re both sat in their hammock. “alright.” she voiced out.

right when jake was about to place a kiss on his wife’s lips, neteyam pulls the hanging fabric to the slide and walked straight to the front door. both his parents flinch at his sudden appearance.

“where you going, son?” both of them ask in unison making neteyam halt his steps.

“training and hunting.” he doesn’t turn to face them and neytiri insists. “you’ve been going out too much lately, nete’ don’t you think you need a break?”

“i’m fine mother.” with that being said, neteyam leaves the hammock while jake comforts his wife whose eyes tear up in worry.

neteyam didn’t fail to notice how his mother sounded worried and he hated that he caused that, but he doesn’t want them to figure out what’s wrong. he can’t risk your safety if they find out without you two communicating.

what if they hurt you? what will he do?

“look who’s finally out,” familiar voice sips to neteyam’s ears and neteyam closes his eyes, can they not just leave him alone? no, not really. lo’ak chuckles as he swings down the branch he was hanging on and jumps next to his brother

“where’re you going big bro?” lo’ak asks but gets ignored, “hey, you know i’m talking to you…”

“leave him skxawng, he’s in his emo arc.” kiri lets a sarcastic laugh out making the heartbroken man annoyed. “yeah? he’s seriously ignoring his one and only siblings” lo’ak keeps pushing his older brother

“can you guys leave? i want to be alone if you can’t see.” neteyam hisses under his breath but it falls to deaf ears. “damn bro, look at those growing muscles.” lo’ak turns to his sister and chuckles

“must be for his future mate, äyea.”

now lo’ak did a little bit of a mistake here, neteyam was now breathing through his nose, jaw clenched as he got his brother pinned to one of the trees. “i fucking told you to leave me alone, didn’t i? and don’t even dare to bring that name up here, again.”

lo’ak’s eyes are widened when his brother has him pinned to the tree, something dangerous flashes in his amber eyes and lo’ak lets a soft gasp out before being his hands up on air as a surrender.

“can you two stop? you guys are so immature.” kiri huffs out but neteyam only glares at his brother, “neteyam!” she calls out and once neteyam gains himself back, his eyes widens at the state. “shit, sorry.” his ears flatten, “i’m sorry lo’ak.”

both siblings take a glance at each other and lo’ak awkwardly chuckles. “it’s all good bro, you okay?” neteyam only nods before pushing himself out far away from everyone.

everywhere he goes, he kept hurting people and it’s destroying him.

once he was far enough from everyone he couldn’t help but allow himself to walk to the familiar place he finds comfort. the first place he saw you and got swept with love right away.

meanwhile neteyam was walking there you’ve actually managed to leave your hammock after days, well not managed but your mother was the one who threw you out to take some fresh air and communicate with eywa for a while

you couldn’t help but let you feet wander and take you to one of the places that are dear to you in pandora and your village. it was the shores that had glowing fish. the first time you met neteyam and you got your whole body woken up with butterflies.

you’re squat and twirling your hand in the edge of the ocean when you softly giggle as the glowing fish touches your hand with its soft fins. but that giggle didn’t live long when instant memories flood your mind.

“this one is honestly pretty.” you watch the glowing fish circle your feet that’s dipped in the ocean with your man next to you and you hear him hum agreeing but his eyes were only on you

“it really is.” he murmurs and when you notice it, you can’t help but realize your cheeks are heated up.

that was when you two shared your first kiss, of course it was a shy moment but on eywa you swore how good neteyam was, he was basically eating your face. “nete,” you’d sigh to his mouth when he leans and pressed his forehead against yours.

“it’s okay, it’s okay.” he would calm you by pulling you close to him as you’re both hanging your legs in the ocean. he would always place kisses on your skin every time you panic, thinking you’re doing something wrong

you missed that moment, you miss him but you can’t let those feelings win over and forget what he did.

you pull your hands out from the water, pushing those memories away and adjust your balance while you’re still squat and put your chin on your knees. “i miss him,” you speak and watch the fish wiggle around and smile, “you miss him too?” you ask it as if it would reply

you didn’t notice the subtle movement that’s made behind you in the woods as you talk to the animal you playfully adopted as your child with neteyam

neteyam in other hand freezes at his spot when he notice your familiar figure by the edge of the ocean. you’re silent before you let a soft giggle out and neteyam breathes out a laugh as he felt his eyes whelm

he really missed that sound of yours.

“i miss him,” your words catch his ears and his tail swings side to side like a dog. “you miss him too?” you ask as if you’re talking to someone and neteyam catches the fish you two jokingly adopted wiggling at your touch

his heart swells up with emotions.

you still haven’t noticed your used to be man watching you from the woods and sigh before deciding it’s time to leave, you need to distract yourself before you soon start to cry again

once you’re up on your feet, you turn around and your eyes catch the shadow of the tall figure with its tail moving. you let a loud scream out, startled and stumble on your feet only to trip and fall to the ocean.

“fuck!” neteyam curses when your eyes catch his and you’re instantly falling to the water.

“no, no, no!” neteyam was quick to run to you, you suddenly feel someone pull you and snoop you to their arms around your body before stomping out of the water to get you out of there

you’re confused and want to know who it is until a familiar scent helps you recognize who that was, you wanted to call his name out so badly but you just kept yourself silent until he got you to the sand.

once neteyam places you on your feet, you’re bombed with question about safety.

“did you get hurt? want me to carry you? baby, talk to me!” you don’t miss the pet name and don’t know know which to answer. “can you shut up?” you ask and he instantly obeys, “mhm.”

“i’m okay, thanks.” you’re curious to know what he was doing here.

“what’re you doing here?”

“what are you doing here?” he questiones back and your stomach drops. ‘because i miss you?’ you wanted to say but chose to stay silent and start to leave when neteyam suddenly grabs your hand. you’re stood there for a moment before you’re slowly turning to give him a deadly glare.

“what did i say about touching me?”

you’re so dominant it drives him insane, but neteyam heard you say you’re missing him and he has now some hope to relay that you still love him. “can we talk?” his voice is almost silent when he says that

“there’s nothing to talk about.” you dryly reply

neteyam nods and adjust the bow on him he brought for hunting, letting go of your wrist and you instantly miss the warmth but doesn’t show it. “i want to explain that–“

“you don’t need to explain yourself to me like you owe me something neteyam, it’s over for us.” you watch him battle himself from breaking down and swallows hard. you feel the atmosphere turn awkward.

“i heard you, y/n” you glance away from him feeling caught at stealing something. “you said you miss me.” his freckles are glowing and it makes you want to run your fingers on his skin where they exactly are.

“i do miss you” you’re honest and didn’t miss his little whimper when you say that. “but that doesn’t mean i’m not working on to get rid of those feelings.” your words hurt like a bullet being stuck in his chest and neteyam knew that feeling.

“you can’t say that,” he says, ears flattened and eyes hazed with hurt. “i can’t?” you sarcastically remark and scoff before trying to leave. “princes– y/n.” as much as him correctly himself from calling you his princess hurts you, again you manage to cover it up

neteyam feels his heart crack for the thousand times when you flinch away from his touch. “can you stop doing that?”you hiss and he knows you’re trying to protect yourself so bad, neteyam knows this is not you but the stupid shield you try to cover yourself with

“drop the act, y/n stop pushing me away.”

“you’ve a mate and i can’t do that to your future love so don’t touch me.” you’re using his actions against him to protect yourself. neteyam is annoyed now, he was to rip something apart or kill someone.

“look, i know i fucked up but that doesn’t mean…”

“yeah, it doesn’t mean anything, nothing matters.” you say and shut your eyes before taking a deep breath. his next words makes your brain rick in anger.

“can’t you just trust me?!” he dared to raise his voice at you. but in fact, neteyam was only raising his voice up to cover the quivering sound of his voice and stopping himself from crying in front of you

you take a step right to him and click your tongue.

“trust you?” you’re forcefully chuckling now. “i trusted you, neteyam, i trusted you so much but where did that lead me?” you’re poking his chest with your index and neteyam closes his eye before opening them and looking at you

you see something in him shift and realize he’s trying to make a progress.

“i can’t trust you…” you end up whispering the last part. “even if i want to, i just can’t.” you lean to him, dropping you forehead right to his chest and neteyam holds his breath. “i can’t, neteyam. i really can’t.”

as if he didn’t already hate himself more than this, he wishes he would just die at this point. you feel his hands grip your arms and pull you away from him a little far. one hand cups your cheek and he feels you lean to him for warmth.

there, right there was his y/n he knows.

“please,” he’s now begging. “let me make it right.”

you only lean to him to take his warmth one last time before opening your eyes and sighing. “nete’” you watch his breath hitch. “call me that again, please call me that again.”

“nete, i’m leaving.”

neteyam’s body freezes against you, “what?” is the only word he was able to let out. “what do you mean you’re leaving.” it wasn’t even a question, “me and my mom have decided and knows this place isn’t for us.”

you’ve been trying to let him know but you couldn’t until now and you take this opportunity to be close to him for the last time. “i don’t fit here, i’ve to leave.”

“what a..abo…about me?” he was now hyperventilating when he realize why you’ve accepted his touch on your body right now. “you’ve her, you’ve äyea.”

“don’t say that! please don’t say that– i’ve no one except you.” you’re trying to control the tears but neteyam was only making it hard. “neteyam.” your voice is quivering and neteyam shakes his head in denial

“no, don’t you care about me? no! NO!” he’s now holding your arms tight. “neteyam, please don’t make this hard.” you beg as tears start to roll down your pretty skin. “i have to leave!” you yell and neteyam instantly lets you go

he knew he deserved pain but not this one, neteyam didn’t want this he’ll never want this.

“when?” he’s now staring at you numbly. “huh?” you ask confused. “when’re you leaving?” you gulp and think before speaking.

“after your mating ritual, i’ll leave that night after yours and hers…” you stop when he shuts his eyes and blocks your words out. “i’ve to go, i can’t live like this! i don’t want to get hurt anymore.”

neteyam was nodding, stepping back from you. you feel guilty for just dropping it at him like that.

“so you’re saying if i haven’t caught you here i would never know and you would leave me?”

“i’m not leaving you, neteyam, you have äyea.” your words makes him snap.

“I DON’T WANT ÄYEA?!”

“don’t you dare yell at me for protecting myself.” you say and neteyam sniffs angrily. “you know what, i shouldn’t have told to you anything.” you suddenly push past him and walk fast.

neteyam clenches his jaw in anger and pain, no it won’t end like this. he won’t easily let you go like that, never.

enough is enough and nothing will easily end here.

guys it’s 3.1k and i had to stop there yeah? i feel like i might make part 3 and 4 but fr tho should i make it happy ending or sad ending? or maybe alternative ending— i love each and everyone of you sm! mwah!

taglist 𖤘 @eywas-heir @evanpetersluver @ayathehater @redbloond @brooklynscherry-z @spideyluves @littlethingsinlife @arminsgfloll @thesheelfsworld @traveleraroundsworld @giftfromthemoon @emarold @ilovehotdilfsz @kristalposts @raventommy @scryarchives @senpaitanakiuwu @willoswildworld @voniikg @unoficialy-married-to-ace-austin @dearmikewheeler @mcqsx @eitaababe @hafutoru @hestiasalvtore @trhaenyra @23victoria @littlerizzler @ripneteyam @scarletrosesposts @th3-3d3n-g4rd3n @omgily (others will be tags if i make part 3)

[anantaru]

— not saying “i love you” back

including scaramouche, ayato, alhaitham, cyno x gn! reader

꒰ genre ꒱ — fluff, we‘re evil (especially in cyno's part)

— scaramouche

"and please don't forget to buy some fruit!"

you sing over to your boyfriend, musing with a pacifying, settling timbre in your voice when scaramouche indisputably turned around one last time before leaving for the grand bazaar.

in any other occasion, the two of you would proceed to go together, hand in hand, strolling through the entirety of Sumeru City while sauntering in midst the many food vendors to stock up for the upcoming week.

"i will, stop repeating it all over again."

he's gutted, scrunching his eyebrows with indistinct wrinkles showing on his forehead, "i'm not stupid." obviously, kuni was barking back in his usual fashion, tiptoeing around the edge of your nerves.

"obviously you're the smartest."

you responded, with a crooked little grin accompanying your teasing, the taunting that had your boyfriend weak on the knees, making him all giddy but he wouldn't admit it, ever.

he sighs, acting a bit peeved, but in truth he could barely muffle a laugh, or a little giggle at least, "whatever, i'm leaving." your eyes follow him, watching as he walked towards the exit, speaking once more. "bye, love you."

"bye!"

okay, well, maybe you were evil after all.

you weren't sure what brought you to the realization that, yes, maybe now was the right time to poke fun at your boyfriend, provoke scaramouche to tickle a sweet, little reaction out of him.

the moment he had heard you speak, he didn't move, as if he was waiting for the last few sentences he was sure, you must've forgotten.

"really? is that all you got to say to me?"

scaramouche was swaying from leg to leg, left to right, killing time and fiddling his thumbs as his eyes dangerously proceeded to throw daggers on your resting frame, yearning for attention. "mhm!"

as it was, you didn't seem to care, at all, it was both irritating and off putting.

aside from how you were innocently resting on the couch while browsing and paging through a little picture book you bought a while back, you were still, ignoring him, thoroughly indulging in it.

right off the bat, his face tweaked, his left brow twitching in displeasure.

actually, there were two possible routes to take right now, he figured; one, he could either just brush it off and go on about his day or second, he'd go back and find out what he had possibly done wrong this time.

obviously it must've been something quite significant, because normally it's you who's saying 'i love you' first and he needed, no, he deserved to hear that, right now.

so .. how dare you forget about it just like that? without an inch of remorse?

scaramouche was standing upright, shoulders confidently jolted back, while walking to where you were sitting st, and you noticed, of course you did, yet you pretended you didn't, fully immersing yourself into your other activity.

"hey." he speaks lowly now, a little confused but he's got the sprit before carefully lowering himself next to you.

"what's so interesting about this?"

he's ignorantly swatting his hand towards the little book in your grasp, his eyes were now, a touch lower, as if he was sad and actually concerned. "weren't you going somewhere?"

you were expecting this, flawlessly guessing his next step.

yet you opted to burst the bubble before you'd end up giving your boyfriend a heart attack.

meanwhile scaramouche couldn't believe his own hearing, momentarily he was more than fed up, bewildered, "you know what? forget it."

he pursed his lips, you knew he wasn't good with words so when he made an effort to angrily get up from his seat, you quickly wiggled your arms around his waist to drag him down again, nuzzling into his back when scaramouche plopped back into the cushions with a low heave.

"i was just messing with you." you're clasping on him tighter, further when you noticed a slight shake in his body, "forgive me please."

you're mumbling, hardly a whisper, as scaramouche cradled his body to face you, his lips carved into a purse, it was visible on how displeased and worried he had gotten.

he's accepting your apology in his own ways, kind of.

curling himself into your hug and precisely positioning his lips so they’d ghost against your ear, "do this again and i‘ll get back at you." gently kissing your earlobe, "but so much harder."

— ayato

"i will be free to retire from my duties tonight."

ayato spoke in a tranquil approach while applying a moisturizer on his face, gently massaging it into his skin.

"i'll fetch you later so you can join me for dinner."

it was quite usual for the both of you to plan your day ahead post slumber, above that going over ayato's schedule in particular which was mostly tightly packed and overfilled.

"sounds good to me." you're quick to slip into a cozy garment before lowering yourself to the vanity in his bedroom, smiling and carrying on to finish your daily routine.

taking this into consideration, ayato was set to start his day, slipping himself into his jacket before walking back to you once more.

he's lowering his face to charmingly nudge your jaw, "i'll be leaving now." his knuckles gently stroked down your nape while pondering softly.

subsequently, he quietly settled his lips on your cheek to plant a chaste goodbye kiss on you, "i love you."

that being done, ayato stood tall to walk out of your shared bedroom because normally, in any other instance, you'd say it back anyways, no reason for him to wait.

"until later!" your fingers moved idly over your face, not gifting him a single look back, whatever it was— that was developing right now, ayato at first, had no clue about it.

especially once he's almost reached the door, he figured, wait a minute, how come you still didn't say it back?

strange, he thought.

ayato narrowed his eyes and turned around, carefully observing you, extending all his senses in efforts to get behind the little mystery, and then, in the blink of an eye, it clicked and resonated in him.

"oh." ayato put his deepest, commanding voice, his scent, still hovering throughout the entire room, making you nervous, "so that's the little play you have issued for me today."

you're clearing your throat upon noticing the slight vibrations on the floor, emphasizing that he was walking towards you.

"i don't know what you're talking about, baby."

feigning innocence, you so early deciphered that it was in vein, coming from the mere fact that now, your boyfriend had an amusing grin spread across his smooth lips. "you don't know?"

he slowly clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth, quietening his steps once reaching your body and placing his hands on top of your shoulders, watching you through the mirror of the vanity.

he's leaning forward, his shadow overcasting a spell on your body that had all your earlier confidence dissolved into nothingness, you caught yourself panicking and cradled your head to the side to meet his own.

"you know i'm utterly displeased if you act this way."

along the thin skin of your jaw, he planted short kisses on your flesh, his warm, minty breath ghosting over your face, "what way?"

you really wanted to know it now, desired to jump into the cold water without any safety measures.

you took a hard swallow and prolonged the eye contact, "like a brat."

you crooked a smile and then laughed, breathlessly giggling at him.

"ugh, i thought i would win today!"

you, in defeat, dramatically leaned back into the chair to render yourself defenseless, next, cradling his cheek to kiss him tenderly, "sorry."

his animated smile turned your heart ablaze, he was so outlandishly handsome even though he had just woken up half an hour ago.

ayato returned your kiss at the same time, liquifying your touch into his own when he drew himself back, a little, with you still being capable to taste his lips.

"now." he pauses for a brief instance, just a bit, before feebly nudging your nose, "say it back."

— alhaitham

alhaitham had told you, consistently, to be more mindful about your surrounding, urging you to take of yourself, most importantly your overall health.

and at any time you would assure him that you will listen, yet only shrugging his solicitousness off as nothing more than a small scale characteristic of his 'protective boyfriend' nature which traits he would display occasionally.

yet there you were now, sadly— and much to your dismay, vastly nauseous from coughing your literal heart out and attempting to get rid of the gnawing burn in your throat, your stomach churning after every inch of your muscles pulsing.

obviously for alhaitham personally, it was quite funny in the beginning, after all he had told you numerously to look after yourself, that there was a serious flu going around in Sumeru City.

so .. for you to not listen to his advice after all? let's say he wasn't surprised.

"how's my patient doing?" you can hear your boyfriend sing from across the room as you narrowed your eyes upon noticing that damned grin induced on his face, especially at the amusing little ring surrounding the color of his voice.

"what do you want?"

you're speaking lowly, a little raspy while fighting the soreness in your throat, "did you get my medicine?"

you weren't sure if alhaitham purposely took his time to get your treatment or if it was you, in fact, who didn't have any patience left in your frail body.

"of course i did." he's forcefully rolling his eyes, acting all dramatically while childishly swaying the package in his hand.

"what would *you* possibly do without me?"

folding your arms over your body, you intently stared at him now, as if the sole reason he got up in the morning was to get the best of you, mess with you or maybe punish you for not listening sooner.

alhaitham dropped himself onto the bed where you were currently residing in, comfortably nuzzled up in your blanket when you noticed the apparent shift of weight on the mattress.

you're reaching your hand out for the medicine, an invitation clearly made in vein, "can i?" the chill in the air cuts through the haze and pain in your throat, bringing your boiling blood singing on the surface of your cheeks.

as alhaitham made no effort to actually hand it to you, you were on the brink of snapping, attempting to grab it yourself yet he quickly pulled it back. "now, now." he speaks, amused.

"what do we say beforehand?"

"you're joking." your words are short, clumsy and there was something utterly repellent about the hilarity in alhaitham's tone and mannerism, "i'm not."

you're huffing out an exhausted sigh, reflecting the situation in your mind as to how you could pay him back for this behavior, clearly you were aware of how your boyfriend tends to act, how he could be quite a smart ass to you, but mostly to everyone around him.

instantaneously alhaitham breathlessly laughed as he noticed you zoned out, carefully planting the medicine in your palm, "yes, i was joking." his hand drew itself to your cheek to playfully nudge the flesh when he continued his sentence to you, "you're lucky i love you."

"whatever." you spoke and abruptly closed your hand to plump back into the velvety cushions of your shared bed, fully averting his gaze.

"you can go now."

there is a pause before he said anything, your face was hidden in the pillow when he watched over your shoulder.

"so .. you won't say it back or?"

"nope." you were quick to shush him, "really?"

"yes."

"are you sure?"

"yes."

it was an instinct when he suddenly let out a laugh, but an inaudible one, the sound not echoing through the room when it unexpectedly went back to silence.

okay, well, maybe he was a bit harsh today, he figured, you were sick after all so your reaction was valid.

alhaitham carefully sank himself further into the bed so you could perceive his warm body flushed against yours, his broad arm lazily falling over your waist, "okay, okay, i got the message."

whispering in defeat, you suppressed a giggle, cradling your head so you could look at him, "what do we say beforehand?"

the mock in your voice was evident and he did not mind, replying with a chaste kiss on your forehead, "i'm sorry."

— cyno

when it came to something as crucial as playing tcg with your boyfriend cyno, he always urged you to never hold back, to ruthlessly crush him with your cards.

most of the times your boyfriend would get quite competitive as well and you, in all honesty, did not mind. It was cute, really, how his face would slightly scrunch up whenever you were able to land a pivotal hit on one of his cards.

but what was a game .. without some additional fun tucked into it?

especially since cyno was overall a protective boyfriend, you'd love to tickle a new reaction out of him that you never experienced beforehand.

"it seems your cards aren't working well together."

he speaks volumes, two little dimples appearing on either side of his mouth as he chewed on the insides of his cheeks, concentrating and figuring out his next move to take.

"you're always so cruel to me, cyno."

you suddenly blurted out, adding a little mewl.

at this, his eyes abruptly widen in irritation, it wasn't particularly the sentence itself that made him struggle to comprehend what you just said, but the way you had phrased it.

"what?" he says at last, slowly tugging his cards to his body, "you never let me win!"

the contents of his mind have been pinned to your face, eagerly, attempting to decipher what the hell was going on right now.

"and i thought you love me, hm, whatever."

you quickly had to hide your face from him, biting back an evil laugh that was just about to spill when he laid his cards down the table.

"wait." he's panicking and for a moment, you felt bad for even playing this little trick on him, or, messing with his emotions, "of course i love you."

your fingers were playing with the hem of your shirt when you acted reluctant to answer.

"oh, that's awkward now."

your mouth split into a half grin, unable to prevent yourself from keeping up your devilish scheme but archons, cyno's face was priceless, he was absolutely bewildered, as if your words alone gave him serious whiplash.

"speak clear to me now."

his words dried in his throat, agonizingly slow, looking just as horrifying as if he was in the midst of working his occupation as a matra, fighting to the brink of utter death.

"when did you plan to tell me that you didn't harbor the same feelings for me after all?"

cyno couldn't feel his heart anymore, yet it was thrumming expressively under his ribcage. 

you breathe in and hold it, nostrils flaring, before you bursted out in a long laugh in front of him, hiding your mouth with the palm of your hand.

"i was just messing with you!"

needless to say, cyno, didn't find it hilarious at all, clicking his tongue while aiming to get up from his seat when you were quick to jump out of your own, dipping him back into the cushions.

"i'm sorry!" you nervously hugged him, tightly wrapping your arms around his neck, "don't be mad."

if only you weren't so sweet or the love of his life then maybe, he could've stayed mad, or at least lectured you about your wrong doings.

but cyno, did not speak at all, rather did he draw himself into you before leaning in to meet your eyes, propping his chin on your shoulder.

"you're a menace." he exhales with a shuddery laugh, shaking his head in disbelieve and rubbing his eyes awake.

the look of deep concern was still vividly noticeable when he danced his hand over your back soothingly, "now's the time." he suddenly words to you, imploring the obvious with his lips barely moving an inch.

"the time for what?" you were confused, lightly pinching his cheek.

"to say it back." he gazes up, his eyes softening like liquid fire, "you forgot to say it back."

©2023 anantaru do not share, copy, translate any of my work

[icaruspendragon]

remember in 1x12 (faith) when dean has the conversation with the faith healer and he says, "why? why me? out of all the sick people, why save me?" and the healer answers, "well, like i said before, the lord guides me. i looked into your heart and you just... stood out from all the rest." and dean asks, "what did you see in my heart?" and the faith healer answers, "a young man with an important purpose- a job to do. and it isn't finished."

and then remember when in 2x13 (houses of the holy) when sam asks dean, "why can't you even consider the possibility?" and dean says "what, that this is an angel?" and sam says "yes. maybe we're hunting an angel here, and we should stop. maybe this is god's will." and then dean says "okay. all right. you know what? i get it. you've got faith. that's -- hey, that's good for you. i'm sure it makes things easier. i'll tell you who else had faith like that -- mom. she used to tell me when she tucked me in that angels were watching over us. in fact, that was the last thing she ever said to me." and sam says, "you never told me that." and dean responds, "what's to tell? she was wrong. there was nothing protecting her. there's no higher power. there's no god. there's just chaos and violence. and random, unpredictable evil that comes out of nowhere and rips you to shreds. so you want me to believe in this stuff? i'm gonna need to see some hard proof. you got any?"

and then remember in 4x01 (lazarus rising) when dean meets castiel and asks "who are you?" and castiel says, "i'm the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition." and then again dean asks, "who are you?" and castiel responds, "castiel." and dean says, "yeah i figured that much, i mean what are you?" and cas says, "i'm an angel of the lord." and dean says, "get the hell out of here. there's no such thing." and cas shows him the fearsome wrath of heaven and later dean says, "look pal i'm not buying what you're selling, so who are you really?" and cas says, "i told you." and dean says, "right. and why would an angel, rescue me from hell?" and cas tells him, "good things do happen, dean." and dean says, "not in my experience." and cas asks him, "what's the matter?" and then tells him, "you don't think you deserve to be saved." and dean asks, "why'd you do it?" and cas tells him "because god commanded it. because we have work for you."

and then remember when in 4x16 (on the head of a pin) when cas is talking to dean in the hospital and dean asks, "is it true? did i start all of this?" and cas has to say, "yes. when we discovered lilith's plan for you... we laid siege to hell, and we fought our way to get to you before you --" and dean cuts in to say "jump-started the apocalypse." and cas' gaze turns skyward as he says, "but we were too late." and dean asks, "why didn't you just leave me there, then?" and cas, with eyes still upward says, "it's not... blame that falls on you, dean. it's fate." and cas turns his gaze downward once more as he says, "and the righteous man who begins it is the only one who can finish it." and then he turns to dean, looking at him for the first time, and says, "you have to stop it." and dean asks, "lucifer? the apocalypse? what does that mean?" and cas looks away from him and says nothing so dean says, "hey. don't you go disappearing on me, you son of a bitch. what does that mean?" and cas is staring resolutely forward as he says, "i don't know." and dean exclaims "bull!" and cas once more says, "i don't." before looking at dean again and saying, "dean, they don't tell me much. i know... how our fate rests with you." and then dean, with tears in his eyes says, "well, then you guys are screwed." and then he says, "i can't do it, cas. it's too big." and then he says, "alastair was right. i'm not all here. i'm not -- i'm not strong enough." and then cas looks back and dean and dean looks away from cas for the first time since the conversation started and says, "well, i guess i'm not the man either of our dads wanted me to be." and cas looks away and dean says "find someone else. it's not me." and the tears dean has been trying so hard to hold back finally fall.

anyway. i just thought all of that was kinda interesting.

[lovl3igh]

if you simping for young coriolanus snow with excuse that he didn't yet do the things from hg (sex traffic the tributes, mass murder, sending children to fight to death, torturing peeta, johanna etc, turning people into avox slaves), you really should watch the movie again cause he was never a good person, not before katniss showed up, not through all his years as president, not before lucy gray. I know it's not the book and you can't read his TWISTED inner thoughts but tom blyth did really good job showing who coriolanus is

this is the man who prefers lucy gray in a cage bc he can control her better this way. he beat up billy taupe not to protect lucy gray but bc he's jealous, bc he can't stand that she "belongs" to anyone but him. he shamed lucy gray for implying in her song that she was selling herself for food (not mention he did the same with tigris, like if she didn't protect him for starving to death this way). he left her show (mind you, lucy gray was singing love song for him) bc his hunger for power and obsession were stronger than his "love". he decided to kill lucy gray just so he could come back to comfort of food and warm bed and she was his "obstacle"

he has nothing against hunger games and all his ideas to "help" tributes were to profit him personally. I mean HE was the reason why the idea of hunger games wasn't abondoned. he constantly uses plinth family, their money, food, while at the same time makes fun of them and even is a reason why sejanus died. i'm sorry, no, sejanus was MURDERED. snow killed, very violently, bobbin, starved boy, and he claimed that it made him feel powerful

and idc that not everything was in the movie, there was enough to show he's evil person. either you understand that already or go read the book

if you think his handsome and charismatic - I agree, that's the way coriolanus was portrayed. but excusing his actions bc of that? being handsome doesn't make him less of a villain. you're falling for the same trap that capitol citizens did

[evilwickedme]

I said I'd never do jumblr content again and yet here I am because this keeps coming up and it's like the only thing I can think about. That said I will not hesitate to turn off reblogs if y'all are horrible in the notes again, and be warned that I will be blocking anybody who supports any of the theories I mention immediately

There is no such thing as a conspiracy theory that isn't antisemitic. There is no such animal

Antisemitic conspiracy theories go back thousands of years. The ones that still have the most hold on culture to this day are the blood libel, and the protocols of the elders of zion

The blood libel was an accusation that would be brought against Jewish populations in Europe often but especially around Passover claiming that we were killing Christian children for ritual purposes, usually to use their blood for baking matza or other nonsense (it is important to me that you know that this is nonsense. It is horrible and damaging but also to the core a ridiculous lie that never at any point made any sense. They just didn't care). Debatably this trope is present in the merchant of Venice. Undebatably Jews were killed because people did and still do sincerely believe this

The protocols of the elders of zion is a fictitious document published in Russia at the very beginning of the 20th century, supposedly detailing the meetings of the Jewish people who secretly run the world. The protocols were almost immediately proven to be a rip off of another document - ah, plagiarism - but that hasn't stopped antisemites from embracing it wholeheartedly (special thanks fuck you to Henry Ford for publishing them in his newspaper, spreading it across the USA). It built on previous antisemitic tropes, from the greedy banker trope (Jews were forced to be money lenders in medieval Europe as it was forbidden in Christianity and Jews weren't allowed to join any guilds, preventing them from making money in any other capacity - the reason why there are so many Jews in Hollywood is identical, but in the early 20th century) to the concept of dual loyalty (i.e. Jewish are loyal to ourselves above all else and cannot be trusted to be loyal to the country where we live, see: modern trope that every Jew is probably loyal to Israel and the subsequent idea that it's okay to ask every single diaspora Jew how they feel about Israel immediately upon meeting them). It's also worth noting that the word cabal, used to denote the shadowy organizations that supposedly control the world, comes from kabbala, which is Jewish mysticism

The idea of lizard people, created by a guy literally named Icke because he is a gross human being, was designed to repackage the antisemitic shadow cabal concept to be supposedly more palatable

Most qanon theories also build on all of this, such as world leaders preying on children (remember pizzagate?)

But more importantly conspiratorial thinking always positions you as the good guy standing against a mysterious "them", an other which is influencing things behind the scenes. The Jew is the ultimate other, and specifically an other that supposedly forms a shadowy world government, controlling everything and yet somehow not managing to get rid of antisemitism (see: protocols of Zion, lizard people, we control Hollywood and the government which is of course conspiring against you). There is no way to decouple the idea of an evil shadowy organization (usually also referred to as a cabal to really hammer it in) from antisemitism and antisemitic tropes

And this means that even supposedly "harmless" conspiracy theories attract antisemites and train people who aren't necessarily rabid antisemites to confirm those kinds of biases. Obviously Qanon and lizard people are antisemitic, but what does the moon landing have to do with Jews? Well, it was Hollywood and the government that faked it, obviously. Hell, even the conspiracy that Taylor Swift is secretly a lesbian and is either still secretly dating or is exes with Karlie Kloss is riddled with antisemitism -

Okay so I need to explain my position on this because I fucking hate this conspiracy theory, and the fact that most people simply won't acknowledge that that's what it is. Firstly, Taylor Swift has stated that she is not gay or considers herself an ally at least three times off the top of my head, and specifically denied that she was dating Karlie Kloss. Secondly, outing people is wrong. Thirdly, the conspiracy theory hinges on the idea that she would be risking her career by coming out, except that she's proven that basically no controversy can come in the way of her career, she's already "come out" as an ally, donated to glaad and the equality act, promoted queer musicians & artists & designers (there was a song in the reputation tour that was dedicated to a gay designer every single night of the tour). So what's stopping her from coming out at this point? Mysterious forces, clearly. The antisemitism in that I've already explained, but also the virulent antisemitism among Kaylor shippers aimed at her husband and at the fact that she converted to Judaism is fucking disgusting

Again: even a supposedly harmless conspiracy theory leads to antisemitism and attracts antisemites

A few years ago I tried to rewatch white collar cause I remembered really enjoying that show as a preteen and after around a season I just couldn't stand it anymore, because all I wanted to do was jump into the universe and yell at Mozzie to shut the fuck up because these conspiracy theories were barely presented as a joke and never challenged even once by any of the characters. When I rewatched that 70s show it also fucking sucked, but at least it wasn't showing up in every single episode. The blacklist focuses entirely on a literal Cabal, that's what they're called

This stuff is so normalized and it's fucking everywhere and it's exhausting. Jews are to this day being murdered over this. I can't change the world by myself, unfortunately, but if you don't have a specific person to blame for your troubles, shut the fuck up. Just shut up. There is no conspiracy against you. Sometimes life just sucks. Or definitely does for the Jews who get shot at over this shit

Again, I'll be blocking anybody who parrots this bullshit in the comments but especially fucking gaylors y'all are one of the main reasons that being a fan of Taylor Swift's music is fucking unbearable. Just accept you can connect to music made by somebody different than yourself it's not that difficult of a concept

[blondwhowrites]

Authors note: might make a little continuation of this

"Scott, I can't magically make Stiles fall asleep", you said as you walked up to the front door of your best friend's house.

"He hasn't slept in three days", Scott said in a worried voice.

"I wouldn't be able to sleep if I were recently possessed by an evil spirit either", you retorted as you opened the door for Scott.

"That's not the point", Scott huffed in annoyance.

"Then what is it?", you questioned as you stepped into Stiles's house and took off your shoes.

Scott turned to look at you with an exasperated sigh. "You and Stiles have this connection; I don't know; I just think if you were to stay with him during the night, he might sleep", he explained

You stared at him blankly. You blinked a few times, needing time to fully process what your friend had just said. "You want me to have a sleepover with Stiles?"

"Yes! That would be perfect!", Scott said, his voice full of hope, and he clasped his hand on your shoulder. "Please", he pleaded.

"What are you guys doing here?", Stiles said, suddenly appearing from the kitchen, where he had just poured himself a bowl of extremely unhealthy cereal.

You pointed at Scott. " He broke into my room and dragged me here." You had no problem throwing Scott under the bus.

Stiles raised a brow, and he looked at Scott questioningly. "Yeah, but the door was locked. How did you get in?", he asked.

You shrugged your shoulders. "Your dad gave me a key to the house a long time ago", you answered, and you walked towards where Stiles was. You passed him and entered the kitchen, and you immediately went to the drawer where they kept all of their snacks.

Stiles nodded slowly, and he watched as you grabbed a bag of chips. He looked at Scott, who gave him a shrug, and then he looked back at you. "My dad gave you a key?", he asked.

You nodded your head, grabbed a handful of chips, and shoved them into your mouth. Once you had chewed and swallowed them, you said, "Yeah."

Scott cleared his throat as he took a step forward. "Well, anyway, we came here to check up on you", he said, and he gave Stiles a bittersweet smile.

Stiles just rolled his eyes in response, and he turned back and walked into the kitchen. He grabbed his bowl of cereal and sat down next to you at the dining table.

"I came here for snacks", you chimed in.

Stiles chuckled. "I feel so loved", he joked, and he shoved a spoonful of cereal into his mouth.

"Hey, it's not my fault your dad buys the best snacks."

Scott rolled his eyes at his two best friends' banter, and he took a seat across from them. "Your dad said you haven't been sleeping,", Scott suddenly admitted. 

A silence swept throughout the room. Stiles froze and tensed up as if he had just been caught doing something bad. "I've been sleeping." His voice wavered.

You stopped eating your chips, and you looked at Stiles in concern. "You've been having nightmares, haven't you?", you said in a soft voice.

Stiles let out a sigh, and he leaned back against the chair. He nodded. "Yeah, I have", he mumbled. He pushed his bowl of cereal away, suddenly not hungry anymore.

You frowned. "I'm sleeping over tonight", you stated.

Stiles head perked up, and he looked at you in surprise. "Wait, really?", he asked suddenly his whole demeanor lit up again.

You nodded your head, and you looked at him with a smile. "Yes"

Scott got up from where he sat. "Well, I have things to do, so, uh, I'm going to go, bye", he said, giving you two an awkward wave of goodbye, and then he was gone.

"Let me guess he bribed you into sleeping over with me."

"Yep"

[shuadotcom]

Good Vibrations | YJH (M)

Summary: You and Jeonghan have been together for a couple of years and share a lot of the same kinks, so when he first mentioned it, it sounded fun….Now it can best be described as the cruelest form of edging he’s ever inflicted on you.

Pairing: Yoon Jeonghan x Fem!Reader

Genres & AUs: Smut, pwp, established relationship au, non!idol au

Rating: 18+ (MINORS & AGELESS BLOGS DNI. YOU WILL BE BLOCKED)

Warnings: Profanity, car sex, semi-public sex, unprotected sex, use of a sex toy, edging, oral (m. receiving), face-fucking, hair pulling, dirty talk, multiple orgasms, slight degradation in the form of name-calling (slut, whore), pet names (over-usage of princess and angel - I’m not sorry either!!), dom!Jeonghan, sub!reader

Words: 3.4k

Note: Yoon Jeonghan is ruining my life okay 😭 So much so that I wrote this shit in two days which is a crazy record for me. Thank you so much to @the-boy-meets-evil for always being such a wonderful amazing beta ily jess! 💖

Net tag: @kflixnet

“These are cute, what do you think, Y/n?” Jeonghan asks, pointing at the handmade set of chopsticks. You don’t seem to answer in time, because you feel the vibrations running through you get more intense - your breath catching in your throat. “Baby, did you hear me?” His tone is so casual along with the smile on his face. You want to smack him.

After taking a gulp of air, you force your eyes to meet where he’s pointing. “Y-yeah. They’re nice.” 

“Right? We’ll take these, please.” Jeonghan turns back to the woman behind the booth as she happily obliges and starts to wrap up the chopsticks.

This isn’t the first time you and your boyfriend have visited the flea market close to your apartment. Usually, you both are able to find fun knick-knacks and accessories made by the talented people in your town.

This is however the first time you’ve been here with a vibrator shoved inside of you that only Jeonghan can control. 

It was his idea, because of course it was. Apparently, he and his stupid friends had been talking about kinky shit they’ve done with their partners and Joshua mentioned buying his girlfriend vibrating panties. Jeonghan thought that idea was brilliant but instead of panties, he had surprised you with a c-shaped vibrator that not only nestled inside of you but also laid perfectly against your sensitive bundle of nerves so you would get both types of stimulation. You and Jeonghan have been together for a couple of years and share a lot of the same kinks, so when he first mentioned it, it sounded fun. 

That is until he ate you out this morning and then slipped the vibrator inside of you, telling you that he expects you’ll keep it in you all day until he says it’s enough. Now it can best be described as the cruelest form of edging he’s ever inflicted on you. 

As soon as you had stepped out of the car when you arrived, the low hum of the vibrator kicked in, nearly knocking you off of your feet.

“Whoa there, Y/n! You okay?” Jeonghan asked, shooting a cheeky smirk your way. 

“Really, Jeonghan!?” You huffed, standing upright again with his help. Each step you took was less shaky than the last, but you had to make a conscious effort not to walk like a newborn baby deer.

“Remember what I said. Be good for me while we’re out and I’ll give you a reward when we get back home.” His tone was so casual as if he was talking about something nonchalant and not your aching cunt.

Your boyfriend had taken your hand then and waltzed through the entrance of the flea market like any other normal Saturday.

It’s nearly an hour later and Jeonghan is still taking his time, stopping at nearly every stall to take in the items and homemade treats, even striking up conversations with the vendors and asking you for your opinions. Each time, he seems to crank the vibrations up a little more on the dangerous device in you.

At some point, he pulls you to a picnic table outside of a tteokbokki vendor and orders a small plate to share with you. 

“Say ‘ah’, angel.” Jeonghan holds a skewer of spicy rice cake up to your mouth, waiting for you to open.

“Jeonghan can we ple-ahh!” Your objection falls short as more intensity hits you, Jeonghan blatantly increasing the speed in front of you. Your nails dig into the plastic of the picnic table, fighting off the impending orgasm.

With a comically large pout, you wordlessly open your mouth, Jeonghan simply beaming back at you and feeding you. He chatters on about how good the weather is and how excited he is to wear the new shirt he just picked up from a couple that makes fun graphic t-shirts.

You love your boyfriend so much - you really do - but right now you want to shove a whole skewer down his throat for the torture you’re experiencing. 

After what feels like hours (when in reality it was only less than ten minutes), you and Jeonghan finish eating and he practically drags you to a boba stall. He already knows what you want, which you’re thankful for because you’re afraid that if you let out any sound, it’ll be nothing but a pathetic moan of his name.

Jeonghan leaves you standing under a nearby tree as the sun gets a little warmer on your skin while he orders for the both of you and casts a look over his shoulder at one point. When your eyes meet you get weak in the knees all over again. His smolder is unmistakable from underneath his bangs, his pretty pink lips quirking up as his tongue darts out to lick his lips. He bites his bottom lip as he practically eye fucks you in broad daylight, any semblance of sanity you have left finally leaving you.

Seemingly satisfied with making you suffer more, he turns away as he thanks the vendor and comes to meet you with your drinks.

“Here you go, princess,” his tone is chipper, a jarring contrast from the way he had just looked at you.

Your hands shake as you take the boba from him, not even attempting to take a drink. You’re so far gone that even his pet names are pushing you close to the edge.

“Jeonghan, honey please.”

“Hmm?” He tilts his head to the side as he sips from his straw without a care in the world.

“Can we please go now? I can’t handle this anymore.” Your words are shaky as you plead with him. Jeonghan doesn’t say anything, studying your face and observing how even standing still you’re trembling in front of him and notices the wet shine in your eyes.

He leans forward, lips ghosting over the shell of your ear. “Okay, princess. Let’s get you home so I can fill up your needy little cunt.” His dirty words have a small whimper leaving your mouth and he has to reach out quickly to steady you as you sway in place.

Lacing his fingers through yours, Jeonghan leads you through the crowd, still going casually he takes a last look at the stalls and items in the market. He’s nice enough to help you into the car when you arrive and even leans over you to buckle your seatbelt, placing a kiss on your forehead before shutting your door. You watch him in the side mirror put his tote bag in the trunk then walk around to get into the driver’s seat.

“You know, you were so good today, princess.” Is the first thing he says as he’s pulling onto the busy street. His hand moves to cover your denim-clad thigh, the small touch making you jolt in your seat. Jeonghan only laughs at you, casting a side-eye glance your way.

“It was so hard,” you sniff, hyper-aware of how warm and how long his fingers are as they draw circles on you.

“I know, baby. But once we’re home it’ll all pay off. I promise you won’t be able to walk for the rest of the day.” He smiles sweetly at you, a choked exhale leaving your mouth at the image of Jeonghan folding you in half in your bed. You know he means it and that only makes you clench your thighs together for the nth time today. “I can see you like that idea.” He squeezes your thigh, his skin feeling red hot to you through the fabric. “Look at you. Pressing your thighs together like a horny little slut.”

“Jeonghan…” He can’t talk to you like this - not in the state you’re in.

“I wonder…is my angel so desperate that she needs to cum now?”

“Mmhmm, please Hannie, I need it! Can I?” You blurt out, not caring how pathetic you sound. It’s how you feel after all of his agonizing teasing. 

“Do it then.” He says suddenly, turning to watch your reaction as he stops at a red light, a mischievous grin forming. In the next moment, he reaches into the pocket of his jeans and the toy inside you is cranked up without warning. Your body jerks in your seat, a scream ripping from your throat as your body involuntarily does as he commands. Tears prick your eyes when you finally get to cum, your panties and jeans adequately ruined as you can feel how much you cum in them.

All you can do is pant as you come down and Jeonghan is at least kind enough to lower the vibrations. Through droopy eyelids, you watch as Jeonghan quickly pulls into the parking lot of a park, stopping the car under a low-hanging tree in the corner of the lot.

When you turn to look at him again, his hand grabs your chin, bringing his mouth to yours. Your lips move together effortlessly, Jeonghan’s tongue prodding at your lips, demanding access. As soon as your lips part, his tongue moves in to claim yours, sucking it loudly into his mouth. You whine in response, your hands coming up to tangle in his dark locks, tugging on the strands as he continues wrapping his tongue around yours, nearly devouring you whole.

Jeonghan pulls away first and moves to kiss your neck as you catch your breath.

“How was that? Does my angel need more?” He mumbles against your skin.

“Yes, please!” You nod feverishly, gasping as he bites down, leaving a mark at the base of your neck.

“But do you deserve more?”

“I do! I’ve been good all day, Hannie! You said!”

“Hmmm,” he hums. “I suppose, but you have to earn it.”

“Anything!” You rush out, head lolling back as he nips at another sensitive spot on your neck.

“Do a good job sucking my dick and I’ll think about it.”

With a last bite at you, Jeonghan pulls away and you watch, wide-eyed as he undoes his belt and unzips his jeans until he has enough room to pull out his length, his hard cock springing out and hitting his t-shirt-covered stomach.

You get to work immediately, hands darting out to pump him a few times. Jeonghan lets out a hiss when your tongue laps at the tip, collecting the beads of salty precum that seep from the slit. One of your hands grips the base of his dick, pumping it a few times as you suckle on his cockhead.

“Fuck, angel, no teasing.” He turns the vibrator back up after his warning and you moan lewdly around him. Breathing out of your nose, you sink onto his length slowly, taking in as much of him as you can. Your hand and mouth work together, your tongue swirling around him as you suck him down. 

Slurping sounds fill the car mixed with the loud, breathy moans Jeonghan huffs out above you. Your head bobs frantically, sucking and squeezing him in all the ways that you know he likes. His long fingers tangle in your hair, gripping at the roots to push you down further. You can’t help but choke as he hits the back of your throat suddenly, but you don’t pull away - you know how much he loves to leave you choking on his dick.

“Shit, look at you, taking me so far down your slutty little throat. You’re so good for me, you know that?” Jeonghan’s praises always spur you on, the desire to make him feel good taking priority because you know he’ll always return the gesture tenfold. 

You attempt to nod, swallowing around him, driving Jeonghan even crazier. He thrusts up shallowly, beginning to languidly fuck your mouth. 

His hold on your hair stays tight, the feeling of his nails digging into your scalp burning along with the ache in your jaw, but you stay where you are, gagging around his cock. You reach down to cup his balls, rolling them around in your palm which draws a deep whine from his throat.

Jeonghan scrambles in his pocket for the remote to the vibrator, turning it higher. You manage a wet, garbled squeal around his length, your eyes crossing as you feel your orgasm approaching faster than the speed of light.

“Gonna cum again, princess? Gonna get that pussy slick and sticky for me?”

“Mmph!” You breathe loudly out of your nose. Your eyes screw shut as Jeonghan thrusts into your mouth rougher, now holding your head completely still as he uses your throat as a fleshlight. The tension in your belly finally snaps, shockwaves rushing through you as you cum with an incoherent attempt to yell Jeonghan’s name. 

Your loud gasp rings out through the car as he yanks you off of him by your hair. You greedily gulp air into your lungs, body shaking as you continue to ride your orgasm out.

“Is my princess doing alright?” Jeonghan checks, his fingers lightly massaging your scalp.

“Y-yes,” you stutter out. 

“Perfect. Come here.” Jeonghan places a kiss on your lips and helps you wiggle out of your jeans and underwear, leaving them on the floor of the passenger seat. He manages to climb into the backseat of the car, helping you over the seats after him and maneuvering your tired body into his lap. Jeonghan reaches between your wet thighs, easing the vibrator out of you, shushing you as you groan at the loss. He tosses it into the passenger seat and helps you lift just enough for him to begin slipping his cock into you.

“Jeonghan!” You cry out as he stretches your walls. Even after cumming numerous times today and being filled with something all day, he still manages to feel heavy and impossibly thick. Your walls greedily suck him in, inch by inch, the sensation alone already making you lose yourself even more in everything that is Jeonghan.

“I know, princess. You’re so fucking tight, but fuck just like that.” His long fingers grip you, easing you into his lap until his dick is buried in you completely.

The two of you share a moan, taking a few seconds to adjust. 

“Hannie…can I move please?” You whimper first, your oversensitivity ebbing away as overwhelming pleasure quickly replaces it. 

“You wanna ride my dick, huh angel?” 

“Yes, please Hannie,” you’re whining for him now, hips trembling at the dire need to get fucked.

“My slutty baby is so desperate for me,” Jeonghan purrs, trailing his hands around your hips to grab a handful of your ass. “Ride me, princess. Make me cum in your messy little cunt.”

Jeonghan’s dirty words set your skin on fire, and you do what he says. You plant your hands on his shoulders and your knees on either side of him for better leverage and begin bouncing in his lap with as much energy as you can muster. He keeps one hand anchored to your hips, helping you with each thrust and his other hand reaches up under your shirt and bra to roughly knead at your breast.

“Hannie…” His name is long and drawn out, egging on his eager hands to begin pinching your sensitive nipples. 

“That’s right, princess. Who’s cock makes you feel so fucking full and good?” His words are steady, even as he starts to buck upwards, meeting your hips every time you drop down. 

“Yours!”

“Fuck yeah. And this pussy is all mine,” he punctuates each of his words with a thrust, quickly jolting you up and down almost faster than you can keep up with. 

The car rocks as he fucks into you, the air hot and stuffy and full of desperation from both of you. Sweat beads at your hairline as you ride Jeonghan and you manage to wrench your eyes open to look at him. 

His dark hair sticks to his face, his forehead glistening with sweat much like yours, but fuck he looks as beautiful as always. His plump bottom lip is between his teeth as his brown eyes, half-lidded and full of desire stare back at you. A playful smirk graces his features and your heart immediately skips a beat.

Even when he’s teasing you mercilessly and talking to you in the filthiest ways, he’s still the most beautiful man you’ve ever seen.

“Gonna hurry and cum for me, princess?”

“Yes, Hannie, yes, fuck!”

“Better hurry up. I don’t know how long we have until someone notices our car sitting here. They’ll all hear you crying for me like a whore.” This isn’t the first time Jeonghan’s fucked you stupid in his car, but it’s the first time he’s done it during the day when anyone could walk by and easily see your silhouette on top of him through the tinted windows. The idea scares you while simultaneously exciting you.

Jeonghan adjusts his hips a little, the slight angle change having his cockhead brush your g-spot just right, making your toes curl and anything that isn’t Jeonghan cumming inside of you vanishes from your mind. 

“Fuck, Jeonghan, yes, yes, yes!” You babble out. You need to cum again so fucking bad - your fourth orgasm of the day so close you can practically taste it. You continue to meet each of his powerful thrusts, your hips burning, but you ignore it, getting closer, closer, closer.

Jeonghan’s right hand snakes between the two of you. His nimble fingers expertly find your swollen clit and rub at it, rolling it between his perfect fingers.

“Shit, baby, I’m so close - so fucking close. Be a good girl and cum with me.” Jeonghan doesn’t give you a chance to answer and instead buries his left hand in your hair and yanks you forward to crash your lips together. The kiss is all teeth, tongue, and spit. It’s messy and needy, capturing your shared lust. 

“Hannie!” You gasp between kisses. “Can I?!” You barely get the words out as he mutters a ‘yes’ against your lips, allowing you to let go. The sound of your blood rushing to your head fills your ears as you hold your breath and your orgasm hits you like a bus.

“Yes, yes squeeze me just like that, angel! Fuck!” Jeonghan throws his head back as he cums, pulling you impossibly closer to his chest as he paints your walls, your name on his tongue as he does.

You sag against him, your forehead resting on his shoulder. You feel Jeonghan’s fingers rubbing circles on your back while you both steady your breathing. 

“I love you, Hannie,” you say, your hands wrapping around his torso to pull him closer into a proper hug.

“I love you too, Y/n.” He reciprocates the embrace, placing a kiss on the crown of your head.

“We should probably get going,” you whisper as another minute ticks by. You didn’t want to separate but it would only be a matter of time before someone nosey happened by.

“Yeah, we should.” Neither of you moves at first after he agrees, but your hips are starting to ache so you begrudgingly sit upright. Jeonghan’s hands hold your waist as he helps you slowly lift yourself until his softening cock slips out.

Flopping onto the seat next to him, you lazily readjust your bra and shirt as he tucks himself back into his jeans and fixes his hair. He helps you move back into the front seat and you wrestle with getting your jeans back on as he climbs into the driver's seat and takes a sip of his now-warm boba.

Once back on the road you reach out to grab at his hand resting on the center console. He gives your hand a squeeze in return, threading his fingers with yours.

“Can we get food on the way home?” You ask, suddenly noticing how hungry you are.

Jeonghan snickers, giving you a look before focusing on the road again.

“All your energy is gone from cumming so much, huh?”

“Stop!” You pretend to be scandalized, smacking the back of his hand. “But yes, actually!”

Jeonghan brings your hand to his lips, placing a light kiss on the back of it.

“Yeah okay, we’ll grab something. You’ll need to regain your strength anyway.” You blink at him, your boyfriend chuckling at your silence. “Did you forget what I said already? I told you that you wouldn’t be able to walk for the rest of the day, didn’t I? I’m not done fucking you, princess.” Heat spreads across your neck and up to your face. Fuck, he did say that earlier, didn’t he? Yoon Jeonghan was truly going to be the end of you. “Now what would you like to eat, my love?”

[lovelybarnes]

Truth- B. Barnes

Pairings: bucky barnes x reader Warnings: truth serum, ooc (its so hard keeping bucky and a truth serum in the same fic?) About: truth serum, request. (ph1+df31) Forgive for mistakes. why do i kind of hate this now

“Where’s this thing supposed to be again?”

Not missing a beat, you continue to survey the wide lab table in front of you, deft fingers careful when they tilt small vials at an angle so you can squint at the contents. “Things. Where are these things supposed to be.”

“Things, then,” Sam mutters, a fragile clinking noise following.

“Be careful,” you chirp, cocking your head at a thick tube with thick, dark liquid. You hold it up to the light, finally able to read the contents. “Whoa.”

“What?” 

“Did you know Hydra made hair nutrients, essentially? This is, like, the evil solution to baldness.”

“You’re kidding,” Sam crows, stepping closer to examine what you’re holding.

“High amounts of minoxidil, some weird fungus, and something that sounds like finasteride on steroids. Also, probably steroids.”

“Bet they could make a fortune on it.”

“If it works in a way approved by the FDA. Like I said, evil solution.” You grimace and set it back on the desk. “Did you find anything yet?”

“No. There’s slime and weird little liquids everywhere but no big-ass, weirdly-shaped tube marked deadly,” Sam grumbles, nose wrinkling as he catches sight of a limp plant. “Do you think that’s a normal dead plant? Or something freaky and poisonous?”

“Probably the latter,” you hum. “And I really, really doubt Hydra would be so stupid as to have the most cliched image of a toxin representing their mysterious poison.” You pause at a large, bumpy glass. “This one is pretty weird,” you say contrastingly, carefully picking it up with two gloved fingers. “Von innen brennt,” you read.

“What does that mean?” Sam asks.

“Burn from within.” You inhale sharply, and tuck it into your chemical storage container. “I really don’t think we should be leaving this in here,” you reason.

“I don’t think we should be leaving anything in here,” Sam adds, pointing to another bottle. “Weltschmerz,” he recites. “What’s that?”

“It’s… it’s apathy. There’s no good translation but it literally means ‘world pain,’” you frown as you grab it, too, twisting it in your fingers. “Bruce and I are going to have a field day.” You tuck it inside the container and purse your lips. “In a morose way.”

Sam shoots you a quick look. “Right.”

You bring your index to your ear and connect to Bucky’s channel. “Hey, how’re you doing?”

“I fuckin’ hate Hydra.”

“Yeah, it’s not great over here, either. We still have that huge lab to check over; are you done with yours?”

“Yeah, I’ll meet you there.”

You confirm, scanning the room once more and sighing softly. “Be careful, okay?”

“I am.”

“Then continue,” you quip, narrowing your eyes at a fat bottle with a tiny opening, translucent candy red sticky inside of it. You poke it to teeter so you can see the label, seeing something unintelligible but missing the necessary ideogram. “We’re not even sure what this stuff is yet.”

“I’m sure you’ll figure it out the moment you see it,” Bucky comforts. Your face heats up, lips pulled to one side as you avoid Sam’s raised eyebrow.

“Right,” you mumble, straightening up. “Uh, we should probably head over there now.”

“Right,” Sam parrots, long and curved with a smile.

You shoot him a look over your shoulder as you walk out, disconnecting from Bucky before responding. “Shut up.”

“I’m not doing anything!” he argues, hands up in surrender. He follows you out chuckling.

“You know exactly what you’re doing,” you murmur, shooting him a final glare as you turn a corner into another dull hall. Grimly, you observe the doors you pass them, perking up when you hear familiar muted footsteps ahead.

Bucky catches your eye, lips turning up a little at the sight of you. You catch his pupils flicker down your figure once you’re closer, snagging on a darkened spot right above your right knee.

“I spilled some water,” you explain, fingers dipping unconsciously to brush against the purported area. “No harm done.”

He moves and the ruby tucked in the crevice of his thumbnail catches your eye. Like an instinct, you reach for his hand, a frown pulling on your lips as you observe the small gash on his thumb. 

“Hangnail,” he responds to your silent question, rubbing small circles into the side of your palm. “M’okay.” 

You’re pleased to affirm so, bumping his shoulder gently after you sneak a glance at Sam. “Okay. How’re you doing, hangnail aside?” 

His eyes constellate among your features and he manages some sort of comfort in his expression. “Bored.”

“Great.” Your voice is soft and pleased. He agrees.

You fall silent once again when the intended lab comes into view, Bucky’s large frame stepping half in front of you to prevent you from getting to it first. He pushes the door open before you can, left hand hovering above his weapon as he scans a room already cleared before letting you in, the same fingers that reached for a gun now grazing the small of your back.

Sam raises an eyebrow but remains silent, watching Bucky’s eyes follow you as you head toward the other side of the room to look through a multitude of vials. They don’t waver even after you spare him a reassuring glance crinkled with a tiny smile.

Quietly, he walks over to Bucky, who’s definitely aware of the movement but startles when he leans in close and taps his shoulder. “Strange man-made horror to find,” he reminds. “You can stare later.”

Bucky squares his jaw, metal fingers moving to graze uselessly along the glasses. “I’m aware, Sam.”

“Uh huh.”

It’s nearly silent then, tinged by brittle clinking and quick glances so heavy they seem loud.

Bucky is tired. Sam is tired. Most importantly, you’re tired—and it makes someone like Bucky a little careless.

He’s very sure he won’t be the one who finds the culprit matching Bruce’s description, which means he isn’t as careful as he should be when he ducks his head and inhales something so pungent it’s startling. He flinches back, making the steel shelf teeter. Both his hands shoot out to steady it, flesh fingers bending close to an undulating liquid that spills little bubbles onto his skin, burning sharply into the broken crevices of his nails.

What follows is worse. Clandestinely, a smudged window closes around his brain. It’s subtle and awful, like his mind processes become blurry and slow while outwardly remaining consistent. He keeps himself from stumbling but is sure his eyes round dismally, blinking owlishly as he struggles to catch up with himself.

It all happens in the quick span of a second before he opens his eyes and everything seems normal again, although something tugs thinly from the back of his mind. Super-soldier sanity, he guesses. He looks down at the cause and sees a match, vial open and a dizzyingly clear liquid stationary inside. A red symbol stamps the label, unnamed.

“I think I have something,” he says, cringing at how far away he sounds. Just when he feels the prickling of doubt, everything clicks into agonizingly perfect place. “This might be it.” Unthinkingly, he curves a finger around the neck of the bottle and holds it up.

“Whoa, there,” Sam warns.

You’re next to him fast, taking it away carefully.

“It was open when I found it,” Bucky supplies.

You nod at him distractedly, producing a lid from your pocket to close the beaker and observe it, thankfully protected fingers twisting it around in the light. 

“It matches the description,” he adds.

“Yes,” you mumble distractedly, half in response to him and half in thought. “This is it,” you lower it into your transfer box and grin up earnestly at him when you close it, “good job, Bucky.” It’s very sweet.

“Thank you,” he murmurs. “S’what is it?”

“I’m not that smart,” you laugh.

Bucky disagrees.

“It’s probably not too dangerous. Not airborne, at least, since it was uncapped like that.” you contemplate a little more, looking back up at Bucky. Your pupils set in a way more calculating. “How close did you get to this? Did you inhale it?”

“No. I don’t think so. I smelled something, but it wasn’t that.” Bucky juts a finger behind him. “Maybe the rotted plant. Probably.” 

“Okay.” You say it rounded, edged with lightly veiled concern. “Tell me if you feel weird at all, okay?”

“Of course.”

Sam comes up from behind you, annoyed. “Okay. Are we done here? Can y’all flirt on the jet? I’m hungry.”

“You get so bitter when you’re jealous,” you bite, shooting Bucky a final, doubtful glance before tugging on his hand to leave.

“Am I so transparent,” Sam deadpans.

Bucky contemplates his strange state as he trudges back to the jet, taking quick notice of how dry his mouth has become, his tongue voluble. What he’s hazed with reminds him of oak bar tables and smoke, drunk confidence summery in his chest. He feels fine, he’s sixty-three percent sure. He thinks.

He’s in front of the jet before he can process the journey over, trying to shake away what feels like a creasing tug to his cling film mind. Your eyes are on him, and it looks like it’s not the first time, lashes kissing anxiously. Sam clambers inside, and you wait for Bucky right next to the doors.

“Are you okay?”

“Tired,” he tells you.

You’re about to respond when Sam shouts for you to hurry. Bucky scowls in his general direction, although it dissolves at your amusement.

“It’s okay, c’mon.” You guide him inside, seemingly unbothered as he follows you around like a puppy. “Do you want to take a nap on the way back?”

“Can I sleep on you?” he asks too rawly. You startle subtly with it, but recover quickly, a pale beam on your features.

“Yeah.” You smile at him, entirely saccharine. “Let me just get everything into the containment units.”

He sits in the seat next to your usual spot and stares after you as you walk away, appreciating the concentrated point of your expression as you fiddle with the storage settings.

“Maybe if you stop staring at her and actually talk to her, you might have a chance,” Sam cuts in, slumping next to him.

“I do talk to her,” Bucky argues. “I talk to her all the time. It’s just… she’s pretty.”

Sam struggles for a response for a second. “Oh-kay.”

“Do you really think I’d have a chance?” Bucky finds himself saying, unsure where his mouth has gotten permission to voice his thoughts. He clutches the suddenly few tendrils of control and tries his best to filter his thoughts. It’s too bad he can’t take things back.

Sam gapes. “What?”

“Nothing,” Bucky forces through his teeth, feeling like he wants to puke. Unexpectedly, words feel so much easier to spill out than silence.

Lovely warmth touches his knees. He doesn’t need to look up to know it’s you, your presence something deftly familiar.

Up close, you’re even more captivating when he finally meets your gaze. He holds back from reaching for you, digging his fingernails into his palm to restrain them from curling around your wrist. He wants you closer.

Your sweet features furrow, sparkly eyes catching on his heated forehead and dilated pupils. “Bucky, are you okay?”

“Can I touch you?” he asks, a little desperate from gating the inclination.

“What?”

“He’s acting weirder than usual,” Sam provides.

“Bucky, sweetheart,” unauthorized, he softens at the nickname, “did you inhale anything? Do you feel okay?”

“Some of it got on me. Are you okay?”

“I’m okay. It got on your skin?” You pull on gloves. “Show me where?”

He raises his right hand for you to examine, inhaling sharply when you take notice of the small gash on his thumb again.

“Okay,” you breathe, slowly and then assured. You grab his hand. He blinks. “Come on.” You say, tugging him to the sink and spraying water up to his elbow. “It might’ve entered your bloodstream, we have to wash it out. Sam, call the team, get Bruce working on exactly what it is.” You push Bucky into an isolation unit. “Probably not contagious, probably not deadly,” you mutter to yourself. “We found it nearly half an hour ago. More severe signs would have started by now.”

“It was a level three at worst,” Bucky says, but stays willingly, watching you. “It’s probably one or two. I feel fine, just… uninhibited. Reminds me of getting drunk back then.”

You shake your head, confused, edging on frantic. “Drunk?”

“It hurts to not tell you things.”

“It hurts?” You’ve never felt more helpless, only able to repeat his symptoms in an attempt to inspire some helpful memory from your research.

“More than usual.”

“Bruce says isolation!” Sam calls. “I quote: ‘There’s probably no need, but better safe than sorry.’”

“She knows!” Bucky shouts, eyes on you.

“He sounds fine. Just as annoying,” Sam chatters away to Bruce, and Bucky tunes him out, concentrating on the concerned lines of your face.

“Sam’s worried,” he thinks out loud. “So are you.”

“I am. You’re sweating, Buck.” You examine his face, fingertips bumping into the panel.

“Don’t worry,” he tries to soothe, his own fingers thumping against the separation barrier when he attempts to touch you. “If anything, this is a little bit of a relief. I don’t need Thor.”

You snort lightly. “You’re insane.”

“A little. Not stable, definitely,” he admits.

You hum lowly, biting your bottom lip, pupils quickly inspecting his features. Before Bucky can comment on it, you voice your thoughts. “Okay. I’m gonna test out a theory. I’ll ask you some questions and you just have to answer. Is that okay with you?”

“Yes,” he answers, then, unnecessarily: “I don’t think it would be if it were anyone else.”

You graciously ignore it, only ducking your chin. “What’s your full name?”

“James Buchanan Barnes. But Steve’s right, that sounds a little snotty, doesn’t it? What do you think?”

You laugh. “I like your name. When were you born?”

“March tenth, nineteen-seventeen.” He frowns. “Damn. Just when I was reeling you in with the name thing.”

“Where do you live?” you ask, ignoring his comment.

He prattles off the address to his apartment. “Also you.”

“Me? I’m not…”

“You are,” he interrupts, glancing up at you anxiously. There’s so much he wants to tell you on the tip of his tongue, so much he doesn’t want to be forced to. Not right now. Not like this.

You catch his meaning and move on, eyes thinning accusatorily. “Are you the one who broke my mug?” 

“Yes, I knocked it off the table. But it was Sam’s fault, he pushed me into it.”

“I knew it,” you mutter bitterly, leaning back, limbs less tense. “I’m pretty sure we’re dealing with truth serum.”

“That’s not too bad. Considering the options,” Bucky says. “It makes sense. I feel… I want to tell you everything.”

“Effective.” 

“Thank you for not asking anything too invasive,” he says.

“I wouldn’t,” you respond.

“This shouldn’t be affecting me,” he continues. “The serum stops the effects. They must have made it stronger.”

You pause. “What?” Then, remembering his situation. “Nothing. Never mind. Do you have any pets?”

“A cat. You know Alpine, she loves you. But I know you like dogs.”

You tilt your head, wanting to ask further, but you stop yourself. “I do like dogs.”

“That’s why I’m getting you a dog for your birthday.”

You beam in surprise. “You are? Wait—”

“I keep looking but I can’t find the right one. I was thinking maybe it’d be better for you to come along, but I was supposed to think about that for a little longer.”

“Sam!” you call. “I feel like I shouldn’t be hearing this,” you confess to him, wringing your fingers in wait for the neutral party.

“No, you’re not supposed to know that.”

“I’m sorry. It’s weird it’s affecting you so much, it must be made for enhanced.”

“You figured it out?” Sam asks. 

“Truth serum, I’m pretty sure. Really strong truth serum, from the looks of it.”

“You have to leave,” Sam says immediately.

“What?” you ask, confused for what seems like the millionth time. “No. I want to stay with him.” Your face twists in concern again.

“I want her to stay with me, too,” Bucky adds.

“No, you don’t,” Sam commands. “Who knows… what you might say in front of—” he points at you, enunciating your name with an italic and a gesture. “You should leave,” he turns to you.

“You’re going to take advantage of me,” Bucky accuses.

“Have you been lying to me?” Sam questions. “I am only interested in confirming. Like: did you or did you not break Redwing two months ago—”

“Sam!” you interrupt.

“Come on. Do you know how much food has disappeared? Water bottles dented?”

“I told you that wasn’t me,” Bucky grumbles, leaning against the wall.

“That’s true. That’s what you told me, but what’s true and what you said can be—”

You glare at him. “Stop it.”

He hmphs. “Fine. I’ll settle. He owes me thirty bucks.”

“Whatever. Go make sure everything’s okay up front, I have to give Bucky some meds. Friday, did you activate isolation protocol?” She affirms as you open the door to Bucky’s unit. It’s cold when you step inside, but when you reach Bucky, he’s burning. “Bucky, how are you feeling?”

“Fine.” He looks up at you, pupils dark and blown. He can’t stop his hand when it lands on you, but you don’t seem to mind, leaning in close enough to his face for him to catch the little details of your face. He clears his throat. “Now I’m a little hot.”

You wipe hair from his sticky forehead, taking a small napkin from your pocket to wipe sweat from his brow. “I can see that. Friday, can you lower the temperature in here?”

“You’re gonna get cold.”

“Don’t worry about me.”

“I always worry about you. You can’t ask me to do that.”

You stare down at him worriedly, thumb rubbing gently at his temple. There’s a hiss nearby, and three pills in a little cup stand on the table. You grab them and hand them to Bucky.

“Take these.” You point to the pale tablets, three in a single container. “They’re a precaution and the blue one,” you pinch it to show it to him, “should make this pass a little quicker.”

He takes the blue one first.

“Five minutes ago, we didn’t know what it was,” Bucky says. “You’re amazing.”

“Friday’s amazing. All I do is hand things to you.”

“You’re amazing.” 

You chuckle, observing his eyes. Purely clinical. “Okay. You are, too.”

Bucky bites his lip. “You don’t believe me.”

“I do.”

“You don’t. You’re amusing me.”

You look genuinely offended. “Absolutely not.”

Bucky cracks a smile. “You have a tell.”

“Bucky Barnes.”

“It’s in your lips. You purse them a little. Like even you can’t believe yourself.”

You pinch his lips closed with your index and thumb. He stares up at you with wide, blazing eyes.

“I won’t complain,” he says, muffled.

“You should! Don’t be so nice to me, Barnes.”

“I like it better when you call me Bucky.”

“Really? Everyone on the team calls you Barnes.”

“I said you, not the team.”

You let go of him, eyes sorry. Your thumb bends, the bone tracing along his bottom lip. You’re so close. He wants to echo his realization so badly.

“You’re so close.”

“I’m sorry.” You move to take a step back.

“No,” he protests, reaching for you again.

“What?” You laugh.

“I’m in love with you.”

The very first thing he feels is great, overwhelming relief. Like something had been interfering with his breathing and his feeling and his being and it was removed.

And then came the panic, thickened with fear of the consequences of his honesty and very thinly edged with something nicer.

You haven’t moved since he admitted it, pretty features contorted in neutral shock. He wants to know you so well, he can tell if it’s good or bad.

“I didn’t mean to say that.” He gulps, wanting very badly to let go of you but unable to do so. “Does that blue pill make it a lot worse before it gets better?”

You stare at him.

“Say something, please. I didn’t mean to say that. I don’t want to—I never wanted to tell you that.”

“Why?” you ask finally. Your brows are knitted, the edges of your features dipped in pain.

“Because I’m in love with you.”

You don’t say anything, but your lips part, the sorrowful border of your features softening. “I… I really want to kiss you right now.”

Bucky freezes. “What?”

Your face heats, pupils flickering away from him. You clear your throat. “But you’re in a vulnerable position right now and I don’t want to take advantage of that. I want you to tell me because you chose to.”

“You’re saying…”

“Yeah.”

Bucky really wants to kiss you too. “Why?”

“Because I think you deserve honesty.”

Bucky really, really wants to kiss you. He cracks an unfiltered smile, although it’s not entirely because of the serum. “Damn.”

“What?” you ask uneasily.

“I’m really fuckin’ lucky.’

[miupow]

౨ৎ⋆ ˚｡⋆ study night .ᐟ c.sb ⊹˚. ♡

╰┈➤ soobin just wants to know what you're reading, is all.

pairing. choi soobin x fem!reader rating. NSFW, MDNI! words. 3.8k warnings. soft dom!soobin, erotic literature, praise kink, degrading, spanking, sunoo from enhypen cameo! vaginal fingering, soobin cums in his pants lol

thank you to @mapofthemazeinthemirror for helping me recover my first fic

“what are you reading?” soobin asked from across your dorm bedroom, sprawled out over a beanbag. he hadn’t looked up from the laptop in his lap for nearly two hours, too invested in his chemistry essay, and you were surprised to glance up and see him peering at you from over his screen. you could see him squinting his eyes to read the cover of the book you were holding, blind as a bat even with his thick rimmed glasses on— you giggled, shook your head and turned the page. you had caught up on assignments far quicker than soobin had, so you had decided to quietly read one of your favorite novels while he finished.

you and soobin had study nights every thursday after classes; a couple of hours for the two of you to help each other with assignments and throw pencils at each other. these nights had been routine since you and soobin met freshman year— you needed help in calculus, and he relied on you entirely to keep his literature grade above a D. plus, you were both quiet and shy, and it was just easier for the two of you to study with each other. soobin stayed in his corner, on your roommate sunoo’s beanbag, you stayed sitting cross-legged on your bed, and you worked in comfortable silence unless either of you needed help. you really enjoyed thursday nights; if only sunoo would stop making such a fuss about leaving for a few hours…

“...yn?” soobin prodded again, head tilted like a confused puppy. you had looked up from your novel but hadn’t said anything, lost in thought— your head had been all over the place since your argument with sunoo right before he left. you wondered briefly if soobin had noticed.

“oh! sorry— i’m reading, um…” you looked down at the open pages of your novel, and it struck you then, far too late, just what exactly you were reading. you shut the book quickly, ears red, “you wouldn’t like it.”

“why wouldn’t i like it?” soobin asked around a mouthful of chips. 

You shrugged, trying your best to look nonchalant. “‘cause.”

soobin gave you a funny look, turned his head back to his essay, and then turned back to give you another, funnier look. 

“what’s it about?”

“don’t worry about it.” you replied far too quickly, sounding guilty as hell. you gingerly placed the book on your nightstand, cover down— soobin blinked at you a couple of times, big brown eyes magnified behind his glasses, and then blinked a couple of times at the book on the nightstand. you really didn’t like the look on his face. 

“don’t you do it!” you warned, not sounding very threatening at all, and soobin gave you an absolutely evil grin. 

soobin leapt from the beanbag in a flash, laptop tumbling to the floor— you shrieked at the top of your lungs, lunging across the bed to grab the book before he did, but soobin’s arms were just so long. he snatched the book with ease, cackling like a fiend as you jumped from the bed to grab it from him— he held the novel above his head with one long arm, the other trying to keep you from climbing him like a tree. 

“soobin! stop it! let me have it! i’m serious! quit it!” you begged, embarrassed nearly to the point of tears as you hopped up and down in an attempt to grab the book from soobin. 

“i just wanna read it! lemme see!” 

six and a half feet up in the air, way above your head and much to your horror, soobin open your book to the bookmarked page and started reading aloud. you smacked him square in the chest, but neither his breath or his smile faltered— god, this man was huge, and it infuriated you. “i followed my boss to his office, watching in bated breath as he rounded his big wooden desk to sit down at his chair. i had made three typing errors on one of his letters, clutched tight in my hand, and my boss seemed madder about it than usual. “put that—“

“stop!” you whined, hitting him across the chest again. you had given up trying to jump for the book. “it’s just a book, it’s not that—“

“if it was just a book you wouldn’t be freaking the fuck out right now,” soobin giggled maniacally. his glasses were slipping down his nose, mostly because you were hitting him, so he leaned his head farther back to read. you briefly considered pulling at his hair, but that felt too cruel. “put the letter on my desk” my boss said.” soobin began again, turning becaus you had started clawing at his neck and arms. “so i did—“

“give me back my book!”

“so i did.” soobin continued, that time not even sparing you a glance. he had started using a stupid little voice for the when the boss spoke, which would have been funny if you weren’t so mortified. “now bend over with your elbows on my desk so that you are looking directly at the letter. keep your face very close.”

“stop it, i mean it!” if he continued reading any further… you felt like crawling into a ditch and dying. 

“if you said it’s just a book i wanna read it!” soobin retorted, evil little smile still plastered on his face. he gave you a sweet, sweet evil smile before turning back to the pages, unfazed by your teary eyes and red cheeks. “i was puzzled, but followed instructions, bending over the top of his desk so that my chest, belly and arms were pressed against the hardwood. my nose was merely a centimeter or two from the letter, which made it hard to read. my skirt was starting to.. to slide up the backs of my thighs, but i was sure if i moved to tug it back down i would just get in more trouble.”

you grimaced when soobin’s voice broke, smile starting to slide off of his face. “now read the letter to yourself. read it over and over again.” my boss said. i read: “dear mr garvy, i am very grateful to you for referring…” at the word “referring”, he— he.. um. oh.”

you started to feel less like wanting to die and more like you were actually dying. soobin stared hard at the pages for a few seconds, ears turning cherry red, but to your surprise and absolute humiliation, he actually began to read aloud again. his voice had dropped that cheerful quality, though, winded like had been hit upside the head. “at the word “referring”, which i had mispelled, he reeled his arm back and spanked me hard. i stopped reading with a loud gasp, shocked— the sting reverberated through my core, fiery hot, and in spite of my embarrassment i began to soak through my panties. at my silence, i was spanked again, even harder. “i said read it,” my boss reminded me, “be a good girl and follow instructions.”

lowering the book, soobin looked down at you with a very red face and an unreadable expression. “you… you actually read this stuff?”

you quickly grabbed the novel from him before haphazardly placing it on your nightstand. “it’s none of your business.” you snip.

“i mean— i didn’t— i didn’t think you liked that kind of stuff.” soobin admitted rather quietly, watching with wide eyes as you angrily collected your scattered study supplies. you dropped your papers into random folders and notebooks before shoving them along with your laptop into your bag— it was a disorganized mess now, but you’d just fix it later. you were too worked up to take your time. 

“so? what, do you think i’m gross now?” you snapped back, embarrassment falling away to irritation. “i told you you didn’t want to read it. just drop it already!” 

“i don’t think you’re gross!” soobin defended rather quickly, to which you raised an eyebrow. “i mean— i don’t care, it’s whatever. i’m just, like… i don’t know, it’s not a big deal.” 

“so drop it.”

soobin sighed, moving slowly to go sit back in sunoo’s beanbag. “okay, fine, i’m dropping it, it’s dropped. i’m sorry, okay?”

you just rolled your eyes. after getting over the initial embarrassment and irritation of the situation, you were ready to just move on with the night. “whatever. are you almost done with that stupid essay? i want takeout.” 

you hadn’t seen soobin in six days. normally that wouldn’t bother you— you had lives— but your next study night was quickly approaching, and you were growing more and more worried soobin wouldn’t show. maybe you should call him, just to apologize…

“maybe he’s just being a prude,” sunoo had supplied helpfully, biting into his sandwich. he had offered you half, as he always did when you had lunch together, but you had turned him down. the idea of eating made your stomach turn. “he probably thinks you’re mad at him and you’re gonna spank him for it.”

you huffed at your roommates giggling, drumming your fingers against the cafe table. “he knows me better than that. i feel like he’s the one mad at me.”

“what would he be mad at you for? being horny?” sunoo snickered. 

“i don’t know… what if he doesn’t want to spend thursdays with me anymore?”

“soobin? stop going to your little dates? doubt it.”

“they’re not dates.” you snapped, voice raised just slightly— you were tired of having this argument with sunoo every time you talked to him about soobin. “we’re just hanging out and studying. he doesn’t even like me like that.”

“oh, so you like him like that then?”

“no! ugh, sunoo, just— whatever! you’re not helping.” you glared angrily down at your iced coffee. you loved sunoo to death, really, but sometimes you just couldn’t stand him— no matter how many times you told him you and soobin were just friends, he would never believe you. 

sunoo giggled again, clearly enjoying your mounting irritation. “okay, okay, i’m sorry. if you’re that worried about it, you could just go and apologize to him yourself.” 

that was the first actual advice sunoo had given in a while. “i don’t even know where he is, though.”

“oh, that’s easy.” sunoo supplied happily. “he’s in his dorm playing video games with his friends. he plays with heeseung-hyung a lot, and that’s what he’s doing right now, so—“

“thank you, sunoo! you know i love you,” you jumped out of your chair to give him a chaste peck on the cheek before gathering up your things and dashing out of the cafe in the direction of soobin’s dorm. you hadn’t even given sunoo the time to finish his sentence. 

“hey, wait, don’t forget your coffee!—“

you didn’t give yourself time to think about knocking on soobin’s door, because you knew if you gave yourself the chance to run away you would take it. he opened the door within seconds— scaring the shit out of you, honestly— messy bed hair and thick glasses framing eyes that looked like a cornered deer. “oh! uh, hey, yn, um—“

“i’m sorry!” you squeaked, cutting him off. you needed to get this out as fast as possible so you could just move on with your life. “i’m sorry i got mad at you last thursday! over the book.“

soobin blinked. “oh. um. alright.”

you both shared a very long, awkward look.

“alright?!” you echoed, growing more irritated by the second. “you’ve been ignoring me for days and all you have to say it alright?!”

soobin’s eyes flickered around anxiously, and it suddenly hit you that you were yelling at him in a public hallway. “i’m not ignoring you—“

“bullshit!” you shrieked. this really wasn’t how you were planning on his apology to go. you opened your mouth to continue, face red with anger, but soobin quickly grabbed your wrist and roughly pulled you into his dorm. you were shocked into silence, eyes wide and mouth agape as he dragged you all the way back to his bedroom. 

“where’s beomgyu?” you asked anxiously, desperate to deflate the tension. the lack of soobin’s roommate screaming at his tv as he played video games only fueled the  anxious pit in your stomach— it was never quiet in this dorm.

“he’s with his girlfriend— does it matter? we need to talk.” soobin let go of your wrist to close his bedroom door, giving you the space you needed to remind yourself that this was just soobin, who ate gummy bears two at a time so they wouldn’t die alone. there was really no reason to feel so jittery… right?

“talk about what?” you ask, attitude back now that you’ve calmed yourself down. soobin was still staring very intently at his doorknob, back turned to you. “why you’ve been avoiding me all week? listen, it’s okay if that book wasn’t up your alley. there’s nothing wrong with being vanilla— there really isn’t any need to get all weird about it. i’m not gonna, like, spank you or anything. we don’t have to talk about it ever again, if you don’t want to, just pretend it didn’t happen—“

“it’s because i want to spank you!” soobin interjected very suddenly, spinning to look at you with wild eyes. his face was bright red. 

“you… what?” you must’ve misheard him. that was the only explanation, surely; there was no way he—

“i can’t stop thinking about it! i thought there was no way you’d be into that stuff, there was no way, but you go and pull this crazy shit and now i can’t go a single second without thinking about putting you over my knee! it’s driving me insane! i can’t even look at you!” 

you opened and closed your mouth a couple of times, surely looking like a fish out of water— this was the absolute last thing you expected to come out of your friend’s mouth. your eyes were wide, your face burned… your pussy clenched pathetically. it came crashing down on you all at once, then, just how horribly you were lying when you said you didn’t have feelings for soobin. you truly never believed he liked you back, however, sure he was too busy playing video games and trying his best to pass his classes. it was like a dream, almost, which might have been why you suddenly felt so brazen— if you wanted soobin, and he wanted you, who were you to deny him?

“then do it.” you said, voice barely above a whisper. soobin looked just as shocked as you were. “if you want to do it that bad, do it.”

soobin moved in a flash, giving you no time to prepare— within seconds you were thrown over his lap, hair hanging in your face as you stared wildly at the carpet. soobin brushed one of his hands against your skirt-clad ass, barely a brush of his fingers, but you still gasped all the same. “do you really want this?” soobin asked, voice low, breathing hard— the outline of his hard cock pressed against your stomach, making it considerably hard to focus, but you still managed to choke out a “yes please.”

soobin stutters out an uneven breath, his fingers inching down to the hem of your skirt, teasing the tops of your thighs for just a moment before pulling the skirt up to expose your ass. “so pretty..” soobin breathed. you felt his cock twitch against your stomach, those long fingers coming back to trace along the edge of your lacy thong. “is it okay if i take your panties off, bunny?”

you whimpered, nodding your head— soobin landed a gentle slap to the junction of your thigh with a chuckle. “use your words like a good girl.”

this couldn’t actually be happening. you had to be dreaming, or hallucinating, or something— silly goofy soobin, your friend who cried watching toy story, was just way too good at this, making your legs shake and your pussy throb while hardly touching you.  in an afternoon your reality had shifted from thinking that soobin had to be the worlds biggest virgin to thinking that soobin is the world’s hottest dominant. 

you weren’t sure how to feel about it, honestly, but your cunt sure did. 

you must’ve stayed silent for too long, because without much warning soobin landed a much harsher spank to the top of your asscheek. “bad girl! c’mon baby, use your big girl words. tell me how much you want it.” soobin goaded, hot breath fanning your ear— you couldn’t hold in your moan, sounding weak and pathetic even to your own ears. 

“p-please… please take my panties off. please spank me.” you whined, face beet red and pussy drooling, making a noticeable wet spot in your pretty little panties— soobin’s deft finger stroked slowly up and down your folds, feeling the wetness seep through. you wanted to scream. 

“that’s my good bunny,” you could hear your panties rip as soobin tore them off of you in one fluid motion, cold air meeting your soaked cunt and making you— and soobin— hiss. it was still and silent for a few fleeting moments, soobin admiring the slick leaking down your thigh, before he straightened up and landed a stinging, eye watering spank deliciously close to your core. it took everything in you to bite back a pathetic yelp.

“that’s for being a fucking tease,” soobin started, soothing your reddening flesh with a soft caress of his palm. “being so fucking hot all the time and convincing me you were out of my league.”

you hadn’t realized that this was confessional. giving soobin an evil smile over your shoulder, you smart, “you’re an idiot. i’ve wanted you forever.”

another spank, this time with even more force. your hips bucked with a shrill cry, eyes watering— you had no idea soobin was this strong. he refused to give you time to prepare. “didn’t say you could talk back.”

you’re on the verge of tears from the red hot stinging in your ass, but you still giggle at soobin’s words. “you’re kinky.”

soobin just rolls his eyes that time, spanking you again. “and this one’s for being a brat. how about you start counting for me, love— one.”

“one?! you’ve hit me four times!” maybe you were pushing it too far, but it just came naturally to you to fight back in some way. you relished losing.

soobin grabbed a handful of your hair and yanked hard, making you gasp loudly and your pussy clench painfully around nothing. leaning down close to your ear, soobin let out a warning growl— “i said fucking count.”

you swore you’ve never been this wet in your life. torn between bucking your hips into soobin’s bulge and pushing back onto his hand, you give a quiet, watery whimper of “one.”

the hand holding your hair lets go at once, letting your head fall limply over his knee. “that’s my girl.” 

another spank. you moan. “two.” 

“three.” you’re crying now. soobin’s hand lingers, fingers ghosting over your sticky folds… you shift your hips and open your thighs to give him access. 

four never comes. soobin pushes two long, thick fingers between your folds, stuttering out a low moan like he was the one being touched. he starts a rough, dizzying pace almost immediately, fingertips searching for that spongy spot… you grind your hips back against soobin’s fingers, a drooling mess against his jeans. “bin…” you whined high in your throat— you needed more, you needed him to slow down, you needed him to go faster… you hadn’t been touched like this in ages.

soobin finds your g-spot with ease, and you have to cover your own mouth to keep yourself from screaming. “such a slut, falling apart just because of my fingers…” soobin chuckled huskily, enamored with the wet sounds your cunt made filling the room. “i’ve thought about this forever, god… you’re just as pretty as i thought you’d be.”

you open your mouth to respond, but a strangled moan comes out instead— soobin’s thumb, wet from your arousal, came down to rub tight, delicious circles on your clit, distracting you enough to push in a third finger into your stretched out hole. the stretch burned but you loved it, hips kicking and moans weak as soobin took you apart. 

“...too much..” you manage to choke out, practically biting down on soobin’s thigh to keep from wailing in bliss. you felt full to the brim, pushed closer and closer to the edge with every rough flick of your clit and thrust of his curled fingers— soobin just giggled meanly, fluttering a fourth thick finger around your stretched and soaked hole.

“oh, bunny, if this is too much there’s no way you’ll be able to take my cock…” 

tears streamed freely down your face, choked sobs wracking your poor little body, but god you were in heaven… you bucked your hips down against soobin’s own bulge, relishing in the sharp intakes of breath he would take every time— he was starting to fall apart too, sounding a lot less dominating and a lot more pathetic with each roll of his hips up into your tummy. “gonna… gonna make you cum on my fingers,” soobin whined low in his throat, hand completely soaked in your arousal. “you gonna make a mess for me?”

soobin’s fingers dug impossibly and wonderfully hard into your sweet spot, that white-hot band of desire in your stomach winding tighter and tighther with each perfectly aimed thrust. you sobbed, hand reaching back to grab tight onto soobin’s shirt sleeve. “‘m gonna cum!”

soobin’s other hand, that had been stroking comfortingly up and down your back, reached down to pinch hard at you clit, making you scream— “gotta ask first, bad girl, gotta ask for permission b-before you cum…” soobin’s voice was starting to break, his hips stuttering helplessly— the feeling of his hard cock grinding hard against you only added to the fire in your belly. 

“can i cum? please binnie, can i cum? i’ll be a good girl, i promise, just let me cum!” you had no control over your mouth, hardly any conscious at all… all you could focus on was the tightening in your belly, the way soobin’s fingers fucked your pussy so good… you were his brainless whore, fucked dumb on his fingers. 

“go on honey, my good girl, my bunny… cum all over me, make a mess.” with his permission you let yourself fall off the edge, moaning like a whore as you soaked your thighs, soobin’s hands and his jean-clad thigh. you laid across soobin’s lap twitching for quite some time afterwards, heaving breaths like you ran a marathon… you’d never come before like that in your life. soobin was with you the whole way, too— sweet as can be as he cooed praises into your hair, petting your back and kissing your head as you came down from your high. you kind of loved him, you realized with a sickening start. 

you also realzied around the same time that you no longer felt soobin’s bulge poking at you. you released your iron grip on soobin’s sleeve to gently cup his very wet crotch. “bin…?”

“sorry, bunny… couldn’t help it…”

[rynnthefangirl]

Thinking about the Curse of Nacho Varga, how it is enacted through Jesse Pinkman, and how perfect that is.

Cause we typically give Walter all the credit for killing Gus and blowing up the lab, but it all started with Jesse.

Jesse, who saw Gus for who he was from the start, back when Walter was still idolizing him as the perfect and reasonable businessman.

Jesse, who learned that Gus was using children as drug mules and was enraged. Who refused to just accept that evil, and went out to kill the child murderers rather than turn a blind eye for the sake of money and peace, setting off the entire conflict between Gus and Walt.

Jesse, who was manipulated and used as a pawn by Gus. Just like Nacho.

Jesse, who like Nacho was the key to the conflict between Gus and his enemy. Where once Gus’ victory over Lalo and Don Eladio rested upon Nachos shoulders and what he chose to do, now his victory over Walter rested upon Jesse’s shoulders. And while Nacho never really had a choice— either he protected Gus or his father died— Jesse did. He had a choice over if he believed in Gus or believed in Walt. And he chose to believe Walt, because of Gus’s sins. Because Gus had already killed one kid, who’s to say he wouldn’t do it again. And while Tomás was who was going through Jesse’s mind in that moment, Tomás is but the culmination of years of Gus’s corruption. He is everybody Gus has killed in his path to power and revenge. He represents Gus’s contentedness with collateral damage. He represents Gus’s contentedness with Nacho Vargas suffering and death.

The Curse of Nacho Varga is the destruction of the Salamancas/Cartel and Gus, ensured by Nacho’s actions but enacted long after his death. Gus was always going to be agent of the Salamancas/Cartel’s downfall. But the agent of Gus’s downfall was a kid in whom lies echos of Nacho Varga. A criminal with a heart of gold, in over his head, trying to make his own fate in a world where he is being manipulated and used by all sides. And in this universe, he finally gets out. He finally gets his freedom.