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mxtxfanatic · 1 month

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Fandom Gripe #23: I know that fandom is in some deep denial about its treatment of female characters that are canonically involved with fan favorite m/m ships, but do y’all realize that when you disappear female characters from the narrative wholesale to push the idea that your canonically straight fav was “secretly gay all along!” you’re making several bad implications? That 1) bi men don’t exist, 2) bi men do exist, but those who have genuinely loved a woman before cannot genuinely love a man after that (therefore bi men don’t exist in practice), 3) women cannot inspire genuine love and devotion in men, therefore any relationship with a woman is “lesser” than the one they later have a man (see previous parenthesis), or 4) to acknowledge the existence of a lovable woman who isn’t a terrible person, where if a relationship previously existed, it did not end because of “incompatibility,” is enough to destabilize the present relationship between two queer men?

Because why is the tgcf fandom allergic to acknowledging that He Xuan had a whole ass fiancée that he loved? Why does no one ever seem to remember that the kidnappings and murders of He Xuan’s sister and fiancée were the final straws that sent him on his rampage, and he still keeps a shrine to them in the present-day of the story? Why is her entire existence and significance to He Xuan as a man, character, and to his character arc disappeared in favor of pushing Shi Qingxuan—the brother of the man responsible for his fiancée’s death—into that same role, as if to say that her impact on He Xuan is significant... just not when it's from her? Why does He Xuan’s life in fandom essentially begin not just after her death but because of it?

#tgcf #human gripes at fandom #anyways these are rhetorical questions because I already know the answer #i just absolutely hate it #why do y’all hate female characters so badly 😭#especially when they ‘get in the way’ of m/m ships?#mxtx shows that woman more respect in the book than fandom does outside of it #and she didn’t even give that character a name!#simply embarrassing #i could have also talked about jgy here #but let’s be real: that man never loved qin su (or anyone)#so i did not want to include him when discussing people who are *actually* capable of unconditionally loving others #but anyways #mdzs fandom sure loves to either disappear qin su #or act as if she’s the one responsible for why their precious ‘meng yao’ can’t just hop into bed with his bros #you know? the one he killed and the one he used as an accomplice in his murder? those bros? that he so obviously loved with sincerity?#at least moreso than he could ever love a *woman* amiright?#(for legal purposes that last tag was a joke)#i also really hate the implication that he xuan had no life before shi wudu ruined it #that in fact shi wudu made his life 'better' by tying him to shi qingxuan #the romanticization of shi wudu's actions to make way for a ship is... a Choice

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transmascutena · 2 months

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thinking about how akio sees his younger self in utena and wondering if there's any fondness there. doesn't change the horror of what he does to her obviously but i do wonder

#akio and utena #m #long ramble in the tags sorry:#the thing about akio is that he's so evil bit he's also so human #he has feelings. i just don't know what they are (if anything) toward his victims #he loves anthy at the very least i'm sure of that. even if he hates her too. just like she loves and hates him. the lines are blurry.#and i just. i have to wonder whether any of that extends to utena at all. we know anthy at times feels similarly about utena and dios #(and akio by extension.) the simultanious love and resentment. so it's not too unlikely i think.#like. even though he never had anything but bad intentions in getting close to her #i'm not sure it's possible to do everything he did and feel nothing #not that he has any meaningful amount of guilt or remorse for it. i don't think that.#and i obviously don't think he “loved” her in any of the ways she might have thought he did #but did he not care at all? did he not feel any kind of fondness or sympathy or just. idk. pity? for her?#whatever the case it wasn't enough to reconsider having her killed so you know. how much does that actually matter anyway #idk. i think about it a lot. how abusers are rarely entirely indifferent toward their victims #the role he's playing in her life is so fucked up but it IS a role he's playing and i wonder how much he you know... internalizes it?#how much does he believe the illusion of family that he invites her into? because akio DOES often buy into his own illusions.#(similarly i think it's possible that akio is fond of touga too. their mentor-protégé relationship is horrible and abusive #but that doesn't make it less real. you know? maybe real is the wrong word.)#when he talks in episode 25 about wanting utena and anthy closer that's obviously so he can continue to groom her #but is there something genuine there too? i don't know.#again. it obviously does not make anything he does better or even different. but it is interesting to think about to me.#on the other side of that coin does seeing his own past youth and naivete and desire to do good that he (maybe) once had #reflected back at him through her mean anything?#is there resentment there? that she is what he couldn't be? or more likely he just thinks that idealism is stupid.#either way it's something he wants to take from her. anyway ramble over.#i talk a lot about utena's feelings toward akio (familial vs romantic love and the way the two are intertwined in fucked up ways)#but not much the other way around. probably because utena is actually a sympathetic character whose feelings the show very clearly #wants you to analyze and think about.#which is... less true for akio i think. though he's still a complex character with complex motives. he's just harder to get a grasp on.

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icewindandboringhorror · 1 month

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Hrmm... put together a roommates quiz finally after years of thinking it would be an interesting idea lol.. Though obviously not meant to be taken super seriously, I just like thinking about this aspect of personality compatibility. Like yeah, maybe you could get along with someone just chatting with them, but living together is such a different thing. .. curiouse...

#Not that I think that many people would really care since I barely know anyone on tumblr in real life and would never live with random #internet strangers lol but... idk.. I made this to give to friends from time to time and thought... why not post it here too #just out of sheer curiosity if anyone takes it what the most common results would be and etc.#My initial assumption is that most people would probably fall into the 'maybe' category and that either extreme of 'best roomates'#and 'worst roomates' would be the least common #very long also since I like to be thorough I guess #THOUGH... upon second thought... tumblr is home of the like Weird Introverts Who Sit Inside All The Time.. so maybe it's more #likely to come across compatible poeple on here. given that many of the questions are about how meticulous #people are with their scehdules or how often they invite friends over or if they like to mostly stay inside etc.#(since personally I think having a roommate coming and going and bringing random people over all the time would be too chaotic #lol... I need a peaceful quiet household)#Also I kind of don't like the way uquiz seems to do results. I was hoping it would be a number tally? I used some sort of quiz making site #before where you weight the question responses with a number (so the 'Best' response is worth a 0 #The worst is worth like 5 points. and all the in between are like 1 - 4 points or something). So then it is actually possible to have a #''perfect score'' category (someone who gets a literal 0 points). and also you could weight some EXTREMELY bad answers #to add like +10 to the score instead of just +5. And someone who got the MAX possible points would be the WORST compatibility. etc.#But uquiz seems to just be like ''which category did you score towards the MOST'. So someone can give some pretty bad answers #that are VERY non compatible. but as long as MOST of their answers landed in a 'compatible' category #then they would still be listed as compatible despite still actually having some dealbreakers in there. Which is also possible with the #'every answer is a number amount' ranking system too. but I feel like that one does allow for a little more customization #and accuracy (like making the dealbreakers add like...+40 to the score or something so that #there's basically NO way that someone could answer with one of those and still get a good score. Or the ability to have a literal #'perfect score' (getting a zero) etc.#BUt anyway lol... inchresting.. inchresting... curious to consider maybe making a uquiz #for the characters in the gameI'm making like.. which npc are you type quiz or something #now that I've made one and seen how it works.. hrmm hrmm....#(< game will not even be done for like another year but still thinking about nonsense like this lol)

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louisegluck · 1 year

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okay but why does it feel like my life is going nowhere

#.journal #everyone else my age is either engaged #or married #or having a family #then there's me:#someone who's never really have a real relationship #someone who doesn't know what a good relationship even is #(in fact most days a relationship is the last thing i want)#but then why does it feel like i'm missing out on something?#usually i can switch this off and not compare myself to others #but lately i've been finding it hard not to #i just feel...sort of stuck #kind of in limbo?#like my life doesn't really have a purpose #like maybe i don't really have a purpose

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jinstronaut · 1 month

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this is also why i stopped using my tracked tag for a while tbh

#and i might do it again bc its just #a reminder that no one rly cares abt what i do / who i am etc #which might sound over dramatic idk how else to describe it tho its just hollow #it feels very much like a Chore and a Task and if i dont reblog things fast enough from my tag #people get very angry and/or upset with me even tho theres just #so much content and i have 0 time so everything gets queued no matter what #like this whole experience feels like a chore lmao #and it never ever used to #but now theres so much animosity if i dont behave / interact with things Properly #or whatever the make believe rules are idk #this dash can just be so negative like have we all truly descended into madness during this hiatus #bc like i get it ive been up and down and all around too but ive never been straight up MEAN to anyone in this community #and i never want to either so this entire situation thats been bubbling for months just feels like shit #bc what the fuck changed and how do we get back to where we were #i never ever ever ever felt this way before like idk the middle of last year #but ever since like last fall its just been idk. Bad #once again im sorry if ive ever done anything to upset anyone but my silence / absence doesnt mean i dont care #ive just been Incredibly busy due to some real life changes that are out of my control #i might not have energy to answer everything but i do Read everything and it does make me smile #and i save messages that are kind in my heart so i can be reminded of the root of what this blog is supposed to be #a space for something im very passionate about and previously had nowhere else to express said passion #so like idk if we all like the same things why does this weird feeling of competition linger over us lmao #why do all ccs have to fight???? each other???? when we all love and do the same things????#i have nothing against anyone personally but what i Do take issue with is the way that ive been doing this since 2021 and im fully just #ignored and shoved aside by so many people for reasons i fully dont know or understand #so yeah idk this is a novel i just woke up from a spontaneous nap bc im so exhausted i can only stay awake for 3 hours at a time #but yeah anyways idk !#be nice its so easy !#tbd

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monstermoviedean · 3 months

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anyone else have the weirdest and most vivid dreams between snooze buttons

#it felt important so I'm documenting it #I went to walk around my neighborhood and it was pouring rain #I was wearing pajamas but it was okay #my neighbors were walking alongside me until they split off #and I kept going and crossed over a wide artificial river #there were kids watching it and they all walked away except one who rode a tiny bike #the mailman called out to me by name and told me to come back later #the line at the coffee shop was too long so i kept walking #i walked past a class of schoolchildren. their teacher stopped me and asked for directions to the arby's. i told her it was up the hill #they were going on a field trip #i kept walking #the buildings across the street were taller and there were huge trees that seemed the height of the sky #i saw a bird and stopped to watch it. the rain didn't bother me #(it never does in real life either)#and someone stopped to watch the bird with me #and i was ready to go home and then my alarm went off

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coridallasmultipass · 8 days

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Just wanna remind everyone that it's NEVER okay to tell someone to die.

You don't know how hard they're fighting to stay alive every day. Or if they don't even want to fight for that any more.

#i hate that i let that get to me lmao just ruined my fucking day ive been sitting here sobbing for like an hour #i cant tell anyone just how much i dont even want to try any more bc i dont see the point #medical issues and mental issues dont pair well and i dunno if im even gonna be able to survive the next flare up #i dont need fandom spaces telling me to die when im already telling myself that every fucking day #also why does my age always get brought up lmao i didnt choose to be born 30 years ago stop telling me im old #my body has been telling me im old since age 11 you dont know what ive fucking been thru #30 was just a formality and serves as another reminder of how ill never meet societys expectations for a 30yo lmao #my point is. you should try showing a little more kindness if telling someone to die comes so easily #ive literally never once told anyone to die in my life. you just dont fucking go there. what if they kill themself right after that?#can you live knowing they did so on your command?#i couldnt #thats just like beyond fucked up #anyway im gonna go try and stop crying #ill prob stay off tumblr today idk i feel real sick lol #delete later / /#i hate that i cant exist as myself either in person (too queer and closeted in a rural area) or online (too queer and weird ships)#anyway

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partywithponies · 1 year

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The most compelling part of my incredibly elaborate Alison Corruption Arc AU™/Alison Stranded in 1993 AU™ is definitely Alison just becoming an accepted part of Julian and Margot's marriage. The Cooper-y filling in a Fawcett sandwich.

#bbc ghosts #Alison and Margot in my head have a VERY complicated but very deep relationship with each other #they love each other. they hate each other. they both think the other is AWFUL. they'd both trust the other with their life.#they will never understand each other. they know each other intimately.#they can't stand to be together. they miss each other terribly when they're apart #it's toxic. it's profound. it's beautiful.#and obviously they both love Julian but in different ways #Margot underneath it all loves the bastard she married and thinks he can never change #Alison loves the good sweet man she sees deep down inside and believes he CAN change #And Alison still loves Mike of course and WANTS to get back to him but she doesn't know if that's possible #she's stuck in 1993 and the only people she has any real connection with here and the hot awful tory couple she's living with #what's she MEANT to do?#which of course means when she finally eventually does get home she'll be overjoyed to be with Mike again #but heartbroken that she can't touch Julian anymore and that she'll never see Margot again #and also just morally a way worse person now #so really in this AU Alison could never win #she was always going to end up heartbroken either way #the brainrot is real by the way #julian fawcett #margot fawcett #alison cooper

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halogalopaghost · 3 months

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#I'm having anxiety for some reason which is an unfamiliar physical feeling for me #I do depression and my SISTER does anxiety we're the mental illness brothers you see #but nooo apparently she has lent me some anxiety or whatever #anyway I was feeling useless and kind of like shit about how I never do anything anymore #and never get anything done or help around the house or even clean up my own living space #so I just decided I was gonna get out of bed at three in the morning and sweep the whole house #which like. that's fine I guess #and I wouldn't sit down or take a break even when I wanted to stop because I have got to!! start fucking doing things I can't just #be a lump that complains and consumes resources all my life #but anyway that was a bad idea or whatever bc my hands and feet got real hot and red and now I feel like I'm gonna frow up #I'm laid out on the couch near the phone charger. save me phone charger. charger for my phone save me #so what do we think am I feeling unwell from the activity because I don't do the activity enough or because I am just unwell #last time I swept a large area AND mopped was less than a month ago #I. also had to lay down after that actually except I was at work #just laid across a row of seats like yeah just. gimme a fuckin second to necromancy myself here #anyway #I'm a lil anxious bc of my neurology appointment I guess?? it's either that or the Wellbutrin #OR a yet to be identified food sensitivity maybe??#I actually have no fucking clue I just have a bunch of ideas ranked by plausibility #I'm. a little dizzy and the nausea is mcgetting me #farewell cruel world it's been nice knowing u

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arolesbianism · 6 months

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I need agent 4 to appear in side order soooo badly I do not care in what context I just need to put Jim and Mark in the same room please please I'm desperate

#rat rambles #oc posting #splat posting #an agent 4 boss fight could be fun but tbh idrc if theyre a major part of anything I just want them to appear somewhere there #as far as my orbo blorbos tho a boss fight could be soooo juicy #mark and jim only met after their seperate rock bottoms and during their recovery arcs #so the idea of seeing them be put into a low neither of them have faced in years delights me #either way I will be having big boy thoughts abt then once side order comes out #since even if 4 doesnt appear in side order Im forcing jim in there one way or another lol #their t4t cringe is real <3 #bro mark is going to be so pissed off abt being in a damn building again until dedfish shows up then hes going to be all for this adventure #just him staring with big wet eyes as they say some basic tutorial shit like they just said the most earthshattering thing ever #hes also glad to have pearl with him even if the two bitch at eachother a lot #hes also low key glad marina isn't there but like guiltily so #if jim is anywhere in there shes having a panic attack over not being able to contact marie #jim would ofc be freaking out over mark too but marie is like The most important person to them #thats their sister and best friend and also the person who saved their life both figuratively and literally #they would almost certainly not be alive if they never met marie and if they were theyd be in a horrible place on every level #marie was also the first person jim ever grew to truly trust so basically yeah she means the world to them #mark is super important to her too of course but she doesnt rely on him in the same way as she does on marie #mark I assume will have no reason to assume jim is there too but theres no way to know for sure so Ill not dwell on that too much #but mark is generally less prone to panic than jim mostly due to their childhood environments and stuff #so while he'll definitely worry abt jim itd be more him missing her and hoping shes not freaking out too hard than panic #in a way itd almost be exciting to him to maybe get a chance to do actual agent work with jim #like I said they only met post their seperate shitstorms so they didn't even know they were both agents until jim introduced mark to marie #well more like introduced mark to marie as a way to say this one is good be nicies to him #well more so this one is mine Im the only one allowed to bully him but you can pick on him too once he likes you enough #mark is just sitting there like holy shit what the fuck why is she here what do you fucking mean shes that sister you always talk abt #not a day goes by where hes not forced to confront one of his ex crushes fkfndkdb #poor little straight boy all his ex crushes and his current girlfriend keep making him do fortinte dances

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pegasusrightsforall · 8 months

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Birthright Corrin/Kaze is an achingly beautiful love story if you just free yourself from the thought that it’s cringe to enjoy Birthright’s story.

#my genuine hot take is that birthright is not actually all that poorly written #like does it have flaws? yeah.#is it high brow? no.#but is it trying to be? does it have to be?#and sure I’m never going to recommend it to anyone based on its story #and I’ll never recommend it to anyone for gameplay either if we’re being honest #there are better fire emblems in every manner #but does it have to be a contest?#does everything need to be a comparison or ranked on a tier list?#is it not enough to have enjoyed the game?#I enjoyed it once and I will enjoy it again and I will cry about Corrin and Kaze’s beautiful love story #and I will feel no shame #but I might perhaps pity the people who snub their nose at simple joys in search of high brow enjoyment #I think you will find that if you let go of standards that don’t really matter you may find joy in life a simpler thing #and let’s be real y’all we are fire emblem fans #player phase.txt

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alligaytorswamp · 11 months

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which brain disease makes me come up with entirely fictional scenarios in my head, that are just miserable and make me cry irl ??

#and i do it kinda regularly too 🤨#and 'entirely fictional' like im not joking it's ?? not me remembering smth or recontextualizing some sort of familiar experience #this shit never happened . also ppl im thinking about do Not exist either #and yet i just think of .. some horrible things .. kind of.. some of it isn't That Bad..#and the character im thinking thru cries about it #and so do i!!! in real life!!#literally pausing whatever i was doing to sit and just think about this #and then cry #and then im kinda like oh uhm wtf am i doing kinda cringe ok gotta go wipe my tears away uhmmm ok im gonna continue drawing now : \#adry.txt #what is this #why is this #why my brain does this #this is a cry for help #haha get it- bc i was crying-

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mummer · 2 years

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the tension between the absurd and the real in barry is so good it makes me want to explode

#barry #the way some things will be nonsense comedy and it doesnt Have to make sense. and then some things have to be real and you have to look at #it and face it the blood is real except for when it isnt. theres something really coherent here im not grasping #literally cant stop thinking about the ridiculous fuches subplots where he inexplicably gets brought back to life and given another perfect #pastoral future. Like. does fate metaphysically exist in barry???? lol #i mean it very much always comes back to the fact that its a tragicomedy/black comedy/dramedy/etc. that tension will ALWAYS exist #either the blood is real or it isnt. but its masterfully woven into the themes of the fucking show because.... acting!#sometimes the blood isnt real sometimes the real doesnt exist it’s LA its a fake place no one’s from.#THE SHOW IS FIGHTING ITS OWN NATUREEE #i dont know how to articulate this at all.#literally a show set in the exact moment a joke becomes not funny anymore. how do they do it tonally it’s making me CRAZED #alternatively the way barry never gets hit by bullets.#the sally plots / film industry stuff is teetering on absurd but its satire which i think is different.#like. satire is real..... it is #the best tv shows are sentient. i shant elaborate

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gen-is-gone · 1 year

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*deep breath*

JUST LET SANDMAN BE A TRAGEDY IT'S NOT EDGELORD BULLSHIT TO NEED DARK STORIES WHY ARE YOU ALL SO AFRAID OF FEELING NEGATIVE EMOTIONS THAT YOU DEMAND THE TEETH BE TAKEN OUT OF EVERYTHING YOU CARE ABOUT FOR THE LOVE OF THE GODS IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE A CHARACTER YOU LIKE DYING MAYBE DON'T FUCKING WATCH A SHOW YOU KNOW WILL END THAT WAY BUT SOME OF US FUCKING NEED THE FUCKING TRAGEDY YOU HAVE SO MUCH HAPPY ENDING BULLSHIT JUST LET THOSE OF US WHO NEED IT KEEP OUR TRAGEDIES GO WATCH FUCKING CARTOONS IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE IT FOR THE LOVE OF FUCK

ok I think I'm better

wait

ALSO DREAMLING ISNT CANON AND ISN'T GOING TO BE SO NO ITS NOT ~BURY YOUR GAYS~ THAT DREAM DIES THE FACT THAT YOU KIN HIM DOES NOT MEAN IT'S ~PROBLEMATIC~ THAT HE KILLS HIMSELF I PROMISE YOU THERE ARE STORIES WHERE THE GAYS GET HAPPY ENDINGS BUT DREAM OF THE ENDLESS DOES NOT AND SOME OF US NEED THAT CATHARSIS MORE THAN WE NEED FALSE REASSURANCE OF THE SUPPOSED RIGHTNESS OF A MEANINGLESS WORLD

ok *now* I'm done

#megan whines into the empty abyss of cyberspace #but seriously the plot of sandman is a known entity #[redacted] was first published almost 30 years ago #you have more than enough opportunity to find out how it ends #and if you refuse to either read the comics or spoil yourself you don't get to complain about feeling led on #but also #some people in the modern media milieu are so allergic to tragedy and bad feelings #that they take it out on people who like and create tragedy #*real fucking life* does not guarantee a happy ending #and for every person who wants softness in their escapism #there is someone else who needs honesty and not fake unearned HEA #and people on tumblr who hate tragedy are frequently really shitty and entitled about it?#like they act like no story should be tragic or that tragedy could never be truly intellectual #which is absolutely backlash against shitty takes about how tragedy is the only form of intellectual storytelling #but both views are reductive as shit #but seriously there are fucking tons of stories to suit basically any genre that have happy endings #stop trying to take this tragedy away from people who fucking need the catharsis #if you don't like the way sandman ends maybe it wasn't the story for you and that's fine #but stop campaigning for a different ending as though the way it ends is bad writing #just because it makes you sad #that's what it's supposed to do #sorry I dunno why sandman is the place where like all of the different things I never used to care about #are running into a brick wall of seething annoyance I never used to have #but it came roaring back into this moment in my life where I kinda fucking need the unadulterated tragedy

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tiercel · 2 years

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Every time i see osomatsu art in the wild it feels like a jumpscare for the year 2016

#I get todokaras flashbacks every time i see one of those little fuckers #I was never into it so i cant say for certain but why does it feel like every single osomatsu fan was either an incest fan or extremelytoxic #IDK i largely stopped hearing about it after todokaras was revealed to be indulging in their 'fictional kinks' in real life LOL #emf

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trans-xianxian · 2 years

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the instructor I'm working w at my new job is like fine as a person but I'm growing increasingly tired of working with her like this girl truly has no sense of urgency and it's so frustrating like there's a schedule for a reason queen!! we have to be places on time and it takes six year olds like 20 years to stand in a line and even longer for them to grab their stuff And stand in a line!!! she's also late like every day "because of traffic" and it's like okay then leave earlier!! and then during prep in the morning and clean up at the end of the day she just sort of like stands there looking at the schedule of the day/the next morning and it's like bro we/I have places to be can you help me complete tasks!!! and it's not even like she simply doesn't realize what time it is I'll be like okay there's ten minutes to check out we should probably start getting the kids ready to go and she's like yup :) and then doesn't do that at like Please girl we have to be places on time especially when parents are involved 😭

#she also has never worked w little kids before which like to be fair Ive never worked w little kids in a professional setting before either #but I swear to god its like she's never met a little kid before in her entire life 😭#shes just soooo unengaging w the kids like I can tell that she's a good teacher but she simply does not know how to engage small children #she also doesn't know how to tell them no or set real enforced boundaries and expectations #which means I'M always the one saying no or taking privileges away #and I don't think it makes the kids dislike me but its like bro we are supposed to be working together here....#also like she's the instructor and I'm the assistant why am I being the more responsible one 😭#and I KNOW that being the one teaching all of the lessons is a lot #but its like. theres more than just leading lessons in your job description...#idk its just like.. I know that this job is difficult and exhausting and thankless and I know that she's probably trying her best #but that doesn’t stop me from being frustrated abt working w her skhdmcukebfn #idk hopefully it will all get easier throughout the summer we literally have 10.5 weeks left together.....#don't get me wrong I LOVE my new job this is the kind of shit I want to do w my life #but a. I miss middle schoolers and b. no matter how much I love it working w kids is exhausting #anyway. how are you guys #ghost posts #text

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