#(the voice he uses onstage has one but he's very much Putting On A Voice when he performs)

[le-velo-pour-dru]

This video makes me so happy 😊❤️ It's just so fun!! 🫶

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not telling my boyfriend when I got home so I could hear him sing?

My (22m) boyfriend (23m) have been together for a few years, living together for the past 4 months. He's a singer, and an absolutely incredible one at that. He doesn't perform for a living, but doing so has definetly been a dream of his from a young age.

I tend to work later in the day than him, (he's a morning person… takes opening shifts a lot. I could never) so on the nights he does the dishes, I get home to see him washing the dishes with his headphones on, usually singing along to whatever he's listening to. He doesn't tend to hear me come in the door, so I almost always either give him a tap on the shoulder or a hug to let him know I'm home.

The thing is- he really doesn't like when people hear him practice. Vocals especially. He's talked about times he would be working on learning a new song as a young teen and one of his parents would pop their head in to ask him about something, and he would be suppressing tears for a while after. His anxiety around it has gotten a lot better than it used to be, he knows in such a small apartment I'll hear him practicing, but it's still something he usually prefers to be alone for. If he's particularly stressed I'll go out for a walk or put my own headphones in to give him a chance to work without that added anxiety. Either way, I'll usually leave the room so he can repeat whatever line keeps tripping him up without apologizing.

We both see "singing to himself while doing the dishes" and "practicing a new complex song for his band/an audition/for fun" as very different, he'll often even keep singing even if i hang out in the kitchen, (something he's mentioned not being comfortable doing around most- nearly made me cry.) but it changes. I know it does. He sings with so much more freedom when he doesn't think anyone is paying attention, switching between random harmonies and not worrying about his voice cracking if he tries to sing a note a bit too high. Once he realizes I'm home he always quiets down a little bit, or keeps his headphones on one ear so he can pay attention to his vocals with the other. He doesn't realize how much I love hearing his unpolished work. He's never been against performance, I don't think the words "stage fright" have ever been a part of his vocabulary. If I ask him to sing for me, he'll pick up his guitar or put on a backtrack and sing whatever he thinks is polished enough to perform. Onstage his voice is just heavenly, and he fucking knows it. But he just- hates letting people hear him when it's not perfect.

Cut to yesterday- I got home late, and he was washing the dishes, singing to himself, headphones covering both of his ears. He wasn't all that loud, but was so clearly just getting into what he was singing. I can't remember exactly what it was he was singing along to right as I got home, but I just- really wanted to listen. I didn't want to hear his voice get all quiet when he realized I'm there, so I just- sat down on the couch for once. I let him get through another few songs before I got up and hugged him as if I had only just gotten home. He hadn't noticed anything. I didn't tell him. Once he knew I was there, he stopped singing.

I don't think he'd be mad if he found out I waited to let him know I was home, but that doesn't stop a small part of me from worrying. Does he not want to sing around me for a reason? I know logically it's something he's always struggled with, but… I just don't want him to have to censor himself around me. I want him to feel comfortable enough to just keep singing when I get home. But since he's not- I just got home and let him sing without knowing I was there. And I could be an asshole for kind of knowingly breaking the unspoken boundary he's put up- He doesn't want to imperfectly sing around me. And since I always come let him know as soon as I'm home, he can stop himself from singing once I'm there. Maybe I'm overthinking it- but I'm really worried I broke a boundary somehow. AITA?

TL,DR: My boyfriend usually sings while doing the dishes, but always stops singing (or gets a lot quieter) as soon as he knows I'm home. I usually let him know as soon as I'm there, but yesterday I just sat on the couch and listened to him sing for a few extra minutes when I first got home without him noticing, and now I'm worried I broke a boundary.

What are these acronyms?

[wish-incorrect-quotes]

Not putting this in the tags because I'm afraid of inviting too much drama, but anyway, I’ve made a list of stuff that happened before Magnifico ever used the book:

There’s the obvious one, setting up a system in which all the people who live in the kingdom need to hand over an important part of themselves to him, and he’ll only allow a very small percentage of people to have their life’s dream come true. This went on for at least decades, possibly more. It was not a single moment of decision making due to stress.

It’s strongly implied, if not outright canon, that when deciding which wishes to grant, he favors the people who choose to directly serve him and the people who have a wish that will personally benefit him.

Aside from the very recently 18 Simon, his castle staff seems to be made up entirely of underage teenagers. I highly suspect this is because he’s realized child labor means he will benefit from workers with more energy and enthusiasm, because they aren’t living without their wish yet.

Kitchens are full of sharp things and things that can scald you. Many people who work in them, even those who are highly trained, end up covered in burn marks and scars. Yes, Dahlia is intelligent and competent, but it's still wildly irresponsible to make a 16 year old run a professional kitchen without an adult on hand in the room.

Just before Asha meets the king, the previous candidate for the apprenticeship runs away sobbing. Amaya doesn’t seem surprised by this, which would indicate this is far from the first time Magnifico has made someone burst into tears.

He replies with “Do we call that a talent?” to the teenager excited to show him a few drawings she made. Not exactly “evil” I guess, but definitely a good way to crumble the self-esteem of someone who admires him.

He justifies his system by saying that “No one should have to see their dreams destroyed before their eyes.” But locked away in a tower, where most people will die before they ever see it again, that’s fine apparently.

Anyone who looks at an image of an old man playing the lute for a small handful of people and decides it’s a threat should not have complete control over which wishes could be considered “dangerous”.

“You’re young, you don’t know anything.” Great way to handle a concerned citizen there. That will definitely show the younger generation you have their best interests at heart.

Asha, who I will remind you is a teenager, is upset but still makes her case without even raising her voice. Magnifico, who is supposed to have the temperament to rule an entire kingdom, responds with yelling and a threatening blast of magic. I’m rather concerned about what else might have happened if Amaya hadn’t interrupted them a moment later.

He deliberately raises Sabino’s hopes and then dashes them just to spite Asha for disagreeing with him. Also makes Asha publicly sit onstage in front of the entire kingdom to watch him do it.

He makes it clear that now he’ll never consider granting Sakina’s wish either, even though she hasn’t done anything but be related to someone he’s mad at.

If Asha plans to have a family someday, she has pretty good reason to worry that any children of hers will also likely be condemned to life with their wish automatically locked away forever.

Who knows how many other people were taken out of consideration just because the king didn’t like someone they knew?

Later on, he tells his people that they were put at risk by an unknown traitor with magic, then almost immediately starts getting annoyed because people are nervous and asking for some further clarification and reassurance.

The crowd gets at most a bit worked up, but still, no one ever says anything threatening or insulting towards Magnifico. They’re just asking questions because they want to understand more about what’s happening in the kingdom. This is enough for Magnifico to decide he doesn't have enough control, so he should turn to dangerous forbidden magic to increase his power.

Maybe you could argue that trying to use the situation to get a wish ceremony was a bit greedy, but I'd still say that if Magnifico didn't like people asking for wishes, he shouldn't have been literally removing people's ability to work on it themselves.

Of course people are going to be eager to get him to grant wishes, he's told them it's too hard for them and made it so they can't do it without him.

Last note, I've seen people suggest that the book's power was removed when he was imprisoned in the staff, and it's terrible that he was put in the dungeon anyway. I'm not sure the move ever said that, but if it is the case, he still shows zero remorse and thinks he was in the right. There's no "I shouldn't have used the book, I feel terrible about what it led to." Just "Can you believe they pushed back while I was purposely unleashing forbidden magic, crushing wishes, and chaining everyone to the ground? How could they do this to me?"

[sauriansolutions]

So based on some vague keyboard smash posts, plus some screenshots I saw around Tumblr, this is my interpretation of what I think we English server players can expect to see soon in Chapter 7...

Spoilers below the cut because this is all highly accurate!

Rook's dream:

Rook: Omfg it's Neige and Vil! Onstage, together!

Rook: And now they're singing and dancing about their precious friendship!

Rook: And I have a front-row seat!

Rook: *pulls out a pair of jumbo binoculars* :D

Rook: *puts a pair of tiny opera glasses on the jumbo binoculars* :D :D

Vil's dream:

Vil: Hello there, I am Vil--yes, Vil the very successful actor. Vil, the shining star with no competitors whatever, yes, that's me.

Vil: And this here is my lowly assistant... lol I forget his name?

Neige: *bowing* You're so much better than me, Vil-sama, I am unworthy of a name!

Vil: Ahaha how amusing... a talking ant. Don't make me step on you, little bug~

Neige: You can step on me Vil-sama it's okay!

Vil: ... Alright but don't make it weird.

Epel's dream:

Epel: *unnaturally deep voice* Hello fellow students, I'm Epel and I am Very Tall.

Fellow students: *craning their necks to look up and up and up* .......

Yuu: *takes out their Trauma Count notebook and adds a tally mark*

Later...

Yuu: Uhh so, Silver... is this the kinda stuff you see all the time, when your magical narcolepsy makes you visit people's dreams?

Silver: Yeah. This is all pretty normal.

Yuu: Huh.

Silver: 😐

Yuu: I think I understand you much better now.

Silver: 😐

______

God also, apparently, they're going to go backwards through every character's dreams in reverse order of their introduction? And I can't fucking wait??

Here are my predictions:

Chapter 5: Ignihyde

Ortho's dream:

Ortho: Hooray, I'm so happy we're finally outside!

Idia: Me too!

Ortho: And we're at a park!

Idia: You were right all along lil bro, parks are fun!

Ortho: And all our friends are here too!!

Idia: Hooray for friendship amirite?

Yuu and the gang: Huh, this one is weirdly wholesome. Hey, I wonder if...

Idia's dream:

(It's the same dream, but...)

Idia: Omfg help, SOS, mayday, someone please save me!

Yuu: Idia? Are you--

Idia: You gotta get me outta here! There are people everywhere! They're all looking at me and AHHH OH GODS NO, you're people too!!

Idia: ahhh it's literally my worst nightmaaare ahhh *runs away*

Chapter 4: Scarabia

Kalim's dream:

Grim: omg where are we??

Yuu: I dunno, everything's so bright and shiny it's hard to even look at...

*clouds part*

Giant Baby Otter: HELLO

All: AHHH

Giant Baby Otter: YOU ARE ALL CORDIALLY INVITED BY KALIM AL-ASIM TO PARTYLAND, THE LAND WHERE IT'S ALWAYS A PARTY AND THE PARTYING NEVER ENDS

Grim: Oh shit, I wanna go. Can we go to partyland? Please? Pleeeease?

Sebek: No, we can't go to partyland, we need to save WAKASAMA--

All, including Giant Baby Otter: 🥺

Sebek: ...

Sebek: Okay, ten minutes.

Jamil's dream:

Jamil: Muahahaha! Finally, Kalim is DEAD! I killed him!

Jamil: And now... I'm going to...

Jamil: TAKE A NAP!

Kalim: Yaaay I'm actually alive!

Jamil: What?? No!

Kalim: I was just pretending to be dead! Funny joke huh? Hee hee!

Jamil: I literally stabbed you eleven times, how--

Kalim: The power of friendship!

Jamil: That doesn't even--

Kalim: Let's join hands and sing the friendship song!

Jamil: NoOOOOoooOo

Chapter 3: Octavinelle

Azul's dream:

Azul: Welcome to the Mostro Lounge II! The even better, even more monetarily successful version of Mostro Lounge!

Yuu: Oh. Hmm. This is...

Silver: Yes, this seems about right.

Sebek: This is exactly as I expected!

Azul: Excuse you? Are you calling my dream boring and predictable?

Grim: What, you mean you own TWO restaurants, and make even MORE money now? Ugh, let's go before he makes us wash dishes or something.

Azul: *shouting after them* Wait! There are some new menu items!

Azul: Mostro Lounge II has its own Magicam account!

Azul: ...Come back and buy something!

*cricket noises*

Azul: Fine, I don't need you guys anyway! C'mon, Sentient Coin Collection, let's go count you in the Even More Exclusive VIP Room!

Sentient Coin Collection: *weird muppet voice* Hehe yay! I love when you count me, Azul~

Jade's dream:

(It's just a picture of Jade smiling and saying something that's been blurred out. In front of an entire background that's also been blurred out.)

Yuu: We are legally and morally unable to show you what happened in Jade's dream.

Yuu: Needless to say, mushrooms were involved.

Grim: Never EVER, say the word "mushrooms" EVER AGAIN--

Floyd's dream:

(It's the same picture again, but with Floyd.)

Yuu: You know what?

Yuu: We're going to just. Not talk about this one, either.

Grim: *is just sobbing* I HATE DREAMS

Chapter 2: Savanaclaw

Ruggie's dream:

Ruggie: *opens a closet door and finds it overflowing with random bags of chips, fruit slices, a whole baked ham, etc*

Ruggie: omg yes! Look at all this free food!!

Ruggie: *opens another closet door and finds it overflowing with plastic containers*

Ruggie: EVERYTHING'S COMIN' UP RUGGIE BUCCHI TODAY shishishi

Jack's dream:

Jack: ... One thousand! I'm done my sit-ups!

Jack: And now it's time to start my pull-ups...

Grim: Do you actually, seriously dream about working out?

Jack: ...Yes?

Yuu: And then wake up, and go do it for real?

Jack: ...Yes??

Jack: Well, wait, no. Not before I've had a solid 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep, obviously.

Grim: Let's go. C'mon Silver, do the dream magic thing.

Yuu: Yeah, hurry. I'm feeling like a lazier, generally worse person every second that we stay here.

Sebek: *is also lifting weights* Aww, do we have to leave already? I like it here--

Leona's dream:

Leona: zzzzz

*Leona is dead asleep in the middle of the botanic garden*

Yuu: ... can you sleep in a dream?

Grim: Yes, Yuu, we literally just established that in Book 7, Chapter 50-something, weren't you paying attention?

Sebek: So... what do we do now?

Silver: We have no choice. We must... go into his dream-within-a-dream!

*horn noise from Inception*

Leona: zzzzz

*Leona is dead asleep in the middle of the botanic garden, except now everything is staircases*

All: NoOOOOoooOo

*horn noise from Inception*

Chapter 1: Heartslabyul

Trey's dream:

Trey: Oh good, you guys got here just in time. The cookies are ready.

*Trey, dressed in a dentist's garb, pulls a steaming plate of cookies out of a giant mouth*

Grim: NO NO NO EVERYBODY RUN

Trey: Wait, come back, there is a perfectly normal explanation for this I promise--

Cater's dream:

Cater: My Magicam account has its own Magicam account!

All: ...

Cater: Yeah that's it. That's my dream.

Cater: My life actually kind of sucks, okay?

All: 😨

Ace's dream:

Ace: Hey guys, I'd like you all to meet my brother~

Yuu: Is that Patton Oswalt?

Patton Oswalt: Yes it's me, Patton Oswalt, I've been Ace's older brother this whole time!

Grim: Okay wait. Time out. Ace, is your brother actually Patton Oswalt?

Yuu: Or is it just your dream that Patton Oswalt was your brother?

Ace: Wouldn't you like to know!

(This is an inside joke that only me and like one other person will understand...)

Deuce's dream:

Deuce: *surrounded by baby chicks and empty egg cartons* I can't believe it!

Deuce: Baby chicks really do come from grocery store eggs! I KNEW IT!

Deuce: Hah! What do you have to say about THAT, Ace?

Ace: *offscreen* Uhh well, my older brother is Patton Oswalt, so...

Deuce: Argh! Dammit Ace!!

Grim: Are we done yet? I have no idea what's even going on anymore.

Silver: That's pretty normal for dreams, actually.

Yuu: Just one more dream... then we can go face off against Hornton... This one shouldn't be TOO bad, I mean it's--

Riddle's dream

*Riddle is 9,000 ft tall and breathing fire*

Riddle: Who the FUCK ate my FUCKING strawberry tart?!

*Riddle's mom appears, and she is 12,000 ft tall and breathing even more fire and has lasers for eyes*

Riddle's mom: ... LANGUAGE, RIDDLE!

*Godzilla noises in the background*

*Also everything is on fire*

Yuu: *puts on a bowler hat and sips a coffee that just appeared out of nowhere* This is fine.

END

(this got away from me a little)

[covenofthearticulate]

have you ever written about Armand as theatre manager? I need to know everything from your very informed point of view!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🍿

omg WELL i don't know how very informed my pov is because truly the world of theatre production is not my forte!! i'm on the admin staff which basically means I sit at a desk behind a computer all day and get to be a cheerleader for all the folks doing the actual work onstage LMAO

however! i stage managed a show when i was in college and when i tell you it was legitimately the HARDEST thing i have ever done!!!!! stage management is fucking grueling work and I think Armand would absolutely thrive in that environment!! Here are some jumbled headcanons/explanations of what I think Armand would look like as a stage manager and why he'd be good at it:

every day during rehearsal and production, stage management sends around a daily "rehearsal/production report" to EVERYONE. this daily report is basically a summary of the day. what happened, who was called when, outstanding notes for tomorrow. Armand ABSOLUTELY uses these to throw shade. The department notes section is always something like "Costumes: Blue embroidered top coat missing button because Lestat refused to take it off during the break and subsequently broke it."

during the rehearsal process, it's the stage manager that runs the room, NOT the director! Armand is the time keeper which means he calls the breaks and he also cracks down when things need to move along. He is a stickler for the many, many rules. (No, you cannot go to the bathroom unless you can magically make it back in one minute and nineteen seconds before we block your entrance for the the fight scene. No, we cannot run that sequence one more time unless you'd like to pay the fine for not giving the union actors their mandatory five-minute break for 55 minutes of work, per AEA standards.)

(stage managers are actually covered under the same actor's equity union which I think would piss Armand off tremendously. He does NOT want to be associated with Lestat or any of his fellow actors.)

He runs this motherfucking theatre like a GOD during tech week. no joke, usually the sm gets this thing called a "god mic" meaning it's connected to the house speakers so that they don't have to yell from the back of the house to give directions to the actors on stage, but they literally sound like the booming voice of god LOL. Armand very much abuses his god mic privileges and will speak into the mic to answer folks who are standing right in front of him

Whatever you're doing in the theatre, Armand sees you. He just does. He's everywhere and knows everything. He's on headset and in your head. If you break your prop, Armand sees you. If you eat in costume, Armand sees you. If you put your prop in the wrong place on the props table, Armand sees you. He IS the phantom of the opera.

Just think of how good Armand looks in ALL BLACK. He rolls up to work in his Theatre Blacks and every single person in the room has a crush on him because he looks so fucking HOT

But the MAIN reason I think Armand would be a fucking stellar stage manager is because I think he could call any show absolutely flawlessly.

What does it mean to call a show?? WELL! it's absolute magic and i have so much respect for stage managers, please jot that down first and foremost. Calling the show basically means that for every single show during the production's run (typically 8 shows a week for...4-5 weeks in regional theatres), the stage manager sits in the booth during the show, and directs every single tech cue that needs to happen during the show. Light cues, sound cues, deck cues (trap doors), rigging/flying cues, EVERYTHING gets called by the stage manager, IN REAL TIME. The stage manager is on headset communicating with board operators for lights, sound, etc., and basically the board ops job is to press their cue button when the stage manager says "GO," but it's the stage manager's job to monitor the stage and conduct all the different board ops in real time.

It's insanely complicated and VERY fast paced. When I did my fellowship, we got to watch the stage manager call the flight sequence for Peter Pan and I think I counted like 40 cues on just one page of the script. Like, it's insane. It makes my brain hurt just thinking about it.

This is actually a really good example of what it looks like to call a show! IDK, I think Armand would be hella good at it!!!!

IN SUMMARY: every stage manager I have ever met is the sweetest, most intense person. They have the BIGGEST Mom Friend Energy on the planet and don't sleep ever. Armand would make a PERFECT stage manager. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

[chicgeekgirl89]

Glitter and Be Gay

Fandom: 911 Lone Star

Characters: Carlos Reyes, T.K. Strand, Lexi Mitchell

Rating: K

Summary: When Carlos gets called to an incident at a Valentine's themed drag brunch the fallout is much worse than he could have anticipated.

Read on AO3

Of all the things Carlos had imagined doing today, getting called to a drag brunch was not one of them. And so far, it was not going well.

“Ma’am, I promise we are just here to help,” Carlos says for the third time holding up his hands in a non-threatening manner. They still haven’t even made it past the doorway, but he can hear some kind of ruckus going on inside.

“And I am telling you that if you keep calling me ‘ma’am’ we’re going to have words honey,” the queen tells him, her rhinestoned top glittering under the lights. “The name is Peaches.”

“Look, someone in here called 911,” Lexi says. “We are obligated to at least check it out.”

“My girls can handle it,” Peaches says, brushing them off. “We don’t need police in here and we don’t want police in here.”

“Peaches,” Carlos tries again, “if someone in there needs help and you don’t let us do our jobs, there’s a good chance you’ll be held liable. Please let us through.”

There’s a massive crash and several people cry out, startling Peaches. “Oh my god!”

“Okay, we’re coming in,” Carlos says, pushing past her.

The space is crowded, a long runway cutting through the middle of the tables and leading to a stage at the far end of the room. Every surface is covered in pink and red, feathers, confetti, and flowers making the space look like the inside of Cupid’s bedroom. But the most notable feature is the queen onstage who is in a wrestling match with what appears to be a very drunk woman over a bow and arrow. “Doll I don’t know who you think you are, but nobody touches my props!” the queen says sharply.

“I gotta fall in loooooooooove!” the woman shouts back, tightening her hold.

“Get it Loretta!” someone else whoops and Carlos follows the sound to a table right next to the runway full of other inebriated women, clearly Tracy’s entourage.

“What in the hell…” Lexi says and Carlos has to agree. Just when you think you’ve seen everything, Austin surprises you with chaos at a Valentine’s themed drag brunch. Perfect.

“Okay, ma’am, we’re going to need you to come down,” Carlos calls over the din of voices and music. He strides closer and holds out a hand. “Come on, off the stage please.”

“But I need to fall in love!” the woman, Loretta, yells and Carlos wonders if she’s high as well as drunk.

“Babydoll, ain’t nobody gonna want you like this,” the drag queen says, looking like she’s starting to break a sweat. 

Loretta practically growls at her. “You are the rudest Cupid I’ve ever met.”

“Okay, you know what? Fine. All yours sweetcheeks.” The queen lets go and Loretta stumbles back a few steps, holding up her prize triumphantly as her friends scream and cheer her success.

“Great, you got what you wanted, let’s come down and let the professionals finish the show,” Carlos coaxes.

But Loretta isn’t persuaded. Instead she starts parading back and forth, the bow and arrow being leveled at random audience members.

“I think we’re going to need paramedics on this one,” Carlos says and Lexi nods, turning away to call into dispatch on her radio. “Ma’am! Please get down before you hurt yourself or someone else!”

“Are you going to get her off the stage or what?” Peaches says as she pushes her way into the room, hands on her hips.

“I thought you didn’t want us here,” Lexi says.

“I don’t. But since you claim you keep the peace, go right ahead. Get us some peace.” Peaches gestures toward the stage where Loretta has now found a feather boa and is using it to put on quite a show.

Carlos and Lexi exchange looks. “I don’t do stages,” she says.

He squint at her. “What do you mean you ‘don’t do stages’?”

“My mom tried to put me in pageants when I was five. Didn’t end well.”

“Oh my—-fine,” Carlos says with a roll of his eyes. He walks toward the stage and uses one hand to hoist himself up. “Okay, ma’am, let’s go. You need to come with me right now.”

“Hey!” she says. “You’re ruining my show.”

“It’s not your show,” Carlos says patiently. “So you need to come down. Let’s get you off this stage, maybe have some water and we’ll see how you feel.”

Loretta flips her boa around her neck and sends him a menacing look. “You’re stealing my spotlight.”

“Loretta,” Carlos says. “This is the last time I’m going to ask. Please come down off the stage with me.”

“No!” she yells, throwing the bow and arrow at him and then taking off through the curtains into the backstage.

Carlos ducks under the projectile, then follows her into a narrow, dimly lit back area. There are clothing racks full of dresses and props, along with random furniture pieces, lighting, and sound equipment. He trips over a cord on the floor and when he regains his balance, he’s lost sight of his quarry. “Loretta!” he calls. “I just want to make sure you’re okay! Please come out and let’s talk.”

There’s no response other than the sounds of the crowd on the other side of the curtain. Lexi still hasn’t made an appearance, god only knows where she’s gotten to, so Carlos slowly starts to move down the hall to his left. “Loretta?” he calls again.

He opens the first door to find a small utility closet. He’s closing it back up again when there’s a creak further down the hallway. He begins to move toward it and then the next thing he knows he’s being shoved from behind into an open dressing room where he goes crashing face first into a vanity. 

The world explodes in a cloud of white and Carlos sucks in a breath only to begin immediately coughing and choking. He rolls over and blinks and for a moment he thinks he’s gone blind, because he can’t see anything but a silvery haze all around him.

There’s a scuffle happening nearby and when his vision finally clears he sees Loretta on the ground, Lexi working cuffs onto her wrists from behind. “You are under arrest for assaulting an officer,” Lexi is telling her.

“I just want to fall in love,” Loretta says pathetically as Lexi pulls her upright.

“Where the hell were you?” Carlos gasps, struggling to sit up in the debris from the smashed table.

“I ran out to the stage door,” Lexi says. “Thought I’d cut her off.”

“Yeah well, next time, maybe get over your stage fright and stick with me,” Carlos grouses, trying to asses whether he’s broken anything.

“You okay?” Lexi asks as he gets to his feet.

“Yeah I think so—“ That’s when he catches sight of her face. “What?” he asks. “What’s wrong.”

“Oh. Oh Reyes…”

XXX

T.K. is putting the finishing touches on dinner when his phone rings, one of his favorite pictures of Carlos lighting up the screen. “Hey baby,” he says, tucking the phone between his ear and his shoulder as he adds a little more seasoning to the pot. “You almost here? Dinner’s just about done.”

There’s silence on the other end of the line. He pulls it away and checks to make sure the call is still connected. “Helloooo, Carlos, can you hear me?”

T.K. hears a sigh. “Can you open the door please?”

“Open the door? Open…open our door? The loft door?”

Another sigh. “Yes.”

T.K. turns off the stove with a frown. “Did you break both your arms today? Why do you need me to open the door?”

“T.K. just, please. Open the door.”

Confused as anything, T.K. hangs up, crosses the loft, and undoes the lock. “Okay, I’m opening the door, what the heck—“ the question on T.K.’s lips dies immediately as he catches sight of his fiancé. “Oh my…”

“Please don’t,” Carlos says between gritted teeth.

T.K. sucks in a breath and tries to hold back the giggle bubbling up inside him. “Okay um, I, hi, how are you? How was your day?”

“Not great.”

“Is it…Carlos…why are you covered in glitter?”

It’s everywhere. Scattered into his curls, across his face, down his neck and arms. T.K. can’t see his legs, but he has a feeling they’re as equally spangled as the rest of his husband. He looks like he was attacked by a Joann’s Fabrics.  

“There was an incident at a drag show,” Carlos tells him, looking like it is costing him everything just to get the words out.

“An incident. Like you were…hugged for too long by a queen?”

“Like I was shoved into a brand new shipment of body glitter,” Carlos says shortly.

T.K. takes a long moment to process that. “Mhmm. Yeah. Okay. That um, that must have been, upsetting.”

“It wasn’t great,” Carlos huffs.

“Did you get hurt?”

“No,” he says shortly, then thinks for a second. “A couple bruises maybe. I’m fine.”

“Well that’s what’s most important,” T.K. says. “So, are you going to come inside or…?”

“I can’t.”

“You can’t.” This is the most bizarre conversation they’ve ever had.

Carlos looks almost like he’s in pain. “If I come inside then there will be glitter everywhere. Forever.”

“I don’t think it will be that bad,” T.K. tells him.

“T.K.” His name is ground out, meaning Carlos has reached his maximum level of frustration. “Glitter is a menace. Once it gets somewhere you can’t get it off.”

“And that’s what I had to open the door. Because you don’t want to touch it.”

“Yes.”

“So you’re going to what? Stand out here in the hallway forever?”

“I…don’t know.”

There’s a long moment of silence. “Did you try taking a shower?”

“Of course I tried taking a shower!” Carlos snaps. “I took three showers at the station!”

T.K. grimaces. If this is what he looks like after three showers…he might have a point. “We could take you to a car wash?”

This gets him a withering glare. “T.K. be serious.”

“Babe, I genuinely don’t know what you expect me to do right now,” T.K. says, once again fighting a laugh. “I think you’re just going to have to come inside and deal with the sparkly consequences.”

Carlos hesitates, so T.K. slowly reaches out and takes his work bag from his fingertips. “Come on. It will be okay. I promise.”

“You’ll help me vacuum?”

“Absolutely,” T.K. says, taking a step backward into the loft. “I will help you vacuum and scrub and soak whatever you need me to.” That makes him think of something. “How’s your uniform?”

“DOA,” Carlos says in response. He sighs another heavy sigh and takes a step inside, shoulders hunching up like he’s trying to stay as small as possible.

“Well that’s a bummer. You don’t think it could be a new, softer, more approachable look for the APD?” T.K. catches the menacing look on Carlos’ face and immediately backtracks. “Sorry, sorry. Not a time for jokes. I’ll stop.”

He’s definitely calling Lexi later to see if he can get the body cam footage.

[thekidsarentalright]

HELLO I SURVIVED!! my voice is extremely fucked up from screaming and my legs hurt but i’m alive!! i feel like there’s so much stuff i need to ramble abt so i’m just gonna write a fuckin essay here lmao i’m so sorry 😭

ok so the stage looked SO cool in person. the backdrops were gorgeous <3 and everything was like a physical prop, not projections… including the giant replica of bubbles the dog <3 pete kept pretending to put his hand in its mouth and patrick was singing to it! and the pyro was insane, i could feel the heat from it and i was Not super close to the stage. they Also had a clock on the side of the stage that would go backwards every so often… like going back in time to play older songs 😭

UM?!?! THAT SETLIST?!?!?! ginasfs was NOT a possibility in my head at all, so that was absolutely insane, my god!!! everyone was like “???” after pete said they’d never played it live. and then it started and my brain literally blacked out. like my only thought was “there’s no way this is happening, what the FUCK”. that song is so important to me and honestly was one of the first ones i remember loving when i got into fob, so that was a whole moment!! if there’s a different song every time that’s so scary, i SO hope u get the song u want if that’s the case! <333

“don’t forget who left the light on 20 years ago” had me tearing up and then all the tttyg stuff… fob wants us all dead fr! and THEN HEAVEN IOWA?! AND HEADFIRST SLIDE?!?!?! i was HOLLERING the whole time, my throat still hurts 💀 and FAKE OUT OMG WHERE DO I EVEN START 😭 the pink lights worked and it looked so pretty!!! it took some ppl a minute to get theirs set up, so the stadium kinda gradually lit up more and more and by the middle of the song it was fully lit! i swear i saw the exact moment where patrick realized what was going on and he smiled so big <3 i teared up so hard (was trying not to cry bc i had glitter on my face lol… i kinda cried anyway) and then pete gave us a shoutout! i’m def keeping my seashell on like… my wall or smth <3

also the covers!! that first song patrick did at the piano is lake shore drive, it’s actually what he was playing in that tiktok of him in the studio back in like… february! (it’s the piano thing right after the clip of him playing trumpet) my mom recognized it when i was watching that video originally and asked why he was playing it, so i already knew the song… was Not expecting it live tho 🤯 and then don’t stop believing?!?! we were all v confused but excited lmao… and then crazy train a bit later 😅

and pete did baby annihilation!! honestly when i said he could do it and i’d cheer, i did NOT expect him to actually do it lmaoo… but he did and it was fantastic!! hold me like a grudge was also incredibly fun, it goes so hard live <3 shoutout to the ppl who were doing the clapping during the bridge w me lol

every time patrick started talking he’d go “hi” in this soft voice and i was just like “HIIIII 🥺” AND HE WORE DOC MARTENS!!! AAAA 💓 he was so sunshiny and just skipping around like usual <3

OH ALSO!! idk what the other venues on this tour are like, but wrigley has this thing above the stage where they have a couple different flags, and all except one of them were changed out to be the smiley face logo!! it reminded me of when they planted their flag in the lftos music video and i got emotional looking at it 😭 like. they did it!! and it’s so obvious they’re excited to be doing all this!! ur gonna have an absolute blast at your show for Sure!

(the openers were fucking amazing too, i totally didn’t process that tai was playing until literally right before they came onstage. and then they covered snakes on a plane and were like “iykyk” and i very nearly died lmao)

(alsooooo congrats on finishing ur first year of college!! happy stardust summer! mwah 💕)

- 🧋 anon

SOOO sorry to be answering this a couple days later tumblr never showed me i got it!!!!! ANYWAYS

ohhhhh my god it sounds like it was such a fantastic like. incredibly special concert, i'm so happy for u!!! the setlist and the set itself literally blew my mind as i was watching a livestream of the show like????? my god they really pulled out ALLL the stops while also keeping the classics on there, really a setlist to please Everyone i think?? also w the set like. all the animatronic stuff and different backgrounds and everything. patrick was Not kidding when he said this show was visually different than anything they'd ever done before i am. SOOOO impressed. actually both by that and the stardust project, i remember something similar happened for mania tour and it was really pretty (kept my cutouts and still have them!!!) so im VERY glad it's happening this time for fake out <333 they deserve to see all of our love in every way possible <333

SO interesting that that's what he was playing on that tiktok omg he was practicing for so longggggg.... insane that ur show got a special lil piano mashup and then last night he did what a time to be alive.... so curious to see if its wattba forever now or if that's gonna be different each night Too!!!

and YEAHHH baby annihilation being on the setlist is making me soooo ;__; every time i think abt it im sooooo proud of pete for like. being confident enough to do That in front of thousands of people. also made me so happy to see patrick skipping around stage in his slay lil outfit like all four of them were SOOO happy u could tell i just. god i love them, they DID it they had their lil flag planted and played such a good show. last nights show was no doubt so good and special too from every video i've seen i just. i Know this tour is gonna be the tour of a lifetime, im SOOO excited for my show and also so glad urs was such a wonderful time and experience like u got so many special lil things!!! ginasfs and snakes on a plane etc!!!!!!!!! loved hearing all of this <33333

[variousqueerthings]

watching a film that has the distinction of at one point being known as "the worst film in the world" and I believe is still considered "the worst german film of all time" and it's very interesting when comparing it with glen or glenda which at one point was also considered one of the (if not the) worst films in the world

structurally this is not a good film. it is not the worst film I've ever seen, it is simply very low-budget. the acting is non-existent, the camera and sound quality is cheap, and its story is a barely-there reason to showcase someone who in the early 2000s was for a time a famous german popstar, called "daniel küblböck" in the film

[EDIT: I realised after writing this that this person did actually specify "lana kaiser" as a preferred name shortly before dying, and I think that while no place -- including wikipedia -- seems to have taken that wish seriously, I've changed the name in the ways I've talked about this movie from how I did so originally. but that lack of respect is an indicator of everything that this film represents)

it's very interesting, because lana kaiser expressed several times being a trans woman, and this seems to have been not taken in by the world, to the point that post-death, lana is still referred to with he/him pronouns because... who knows for sure. watching the film that is a barely fictional depiction of lana's life (albeit with more assassination attempts than the reality, I hope) and which predates, as far as I know, lana saying any of this publicly, lana is several times depicted as gender non-conforming, both privately and onstage, and described by others in gender non-conforming terms ... and also as very desirable to women (this is the era where long-haired guys with eyeliner who sang was becoming a whole Thing). and that all ties into the discomfort that some people in the film have with lana-the-person. there are literally people asking if "he's" a boy or a girl, just as-text- and at the time lana used he/him pronouns publicly and the character in the film does too, but this is very much a gender non-conforming person, personally as well as onstage

it's interesting seeing this film in the same vein as glen or glenda, as an expression of self that goes completely over the heads of most people watching it who call it trash, while on a meta sense lana (like ed wood and the people glen or glenda is trying to humanise) was also considered trash for that expression and that type of music and stage presence (imagine that in angry grumpy judgemental voice that definitely isn't transphobic but just doesn't understand why anyone would want to do those kinds of things and kids these days and the death of good decent society and art and bad role models and grumblegrumblegrumble)

and also that some 10 years later lana commented on its distinction as the worst film of all time as "not everyone achieves that." which may have been a joke, who knows, but that is a queer distinction -- being so unpalatable to a mainstream audience that you are completely unforgettable -- to the point that there's queer academia written about it as concept

is this a good film? eh I mean, I don't think it really exists for that purpose, so it doesn't really hold value as a way of rating it. is it queer and does it feel like some of the discomfort around it and lana in general came from a discomfort with queer experimental artistic expression, making people unable to rate this movie along lines other than "good" or "bad" even as they themselves were drawn to the idea of watching something bad, but then being put off by something totally incomprehensible? ohhhohohooo yes indeed

it's also an odd one to watch knowing that "daniel küblböck" the character in it talks about the future and worries about bad things and death when you know a bit about lana's irl trajectory. it's a shockingly disquieting piece that seems to understand a lot about how gender non-conforming people are eaten up and spat out and abandoned by these systems and it feels to exist so publicly while trying to be authentic

i must therefore love it a bit, obviously

[lilys42]

Bandmates (Josh Dun)- Chapter Five

Tyler, Josh, and I work out the logistics of me joining them on tour for about an hour: I’d start out playing one or two songs with them onstage so I could get comfortable, and gradually work up to more. Plus, the rehearsal process to figure out exactly what I’d be doing would take a while, and Tyler said he didn’t want to overwhelm me. We have a week until the first show, so I’ll be spending most of my time practicing Shy Away and The Outside on my own, then rehearsing the movements with the boys.

Once we have everything figured out, I pull out my phone to call Rhea to pick me up. Before I can press the call button, I notice a text message she sent me about thirty minutes ago. Hey, someone called out of work last minute, so I have to go in. Should only be gone for a couple hours, but I figured you’d be busy with your boy ;) I roll my eyes, then a sudden wave of panic hits me. If she can’t pick me up now, that means I have to stay at Tyler’s until she gets off. And that wouldn’t be a problem for me, but the last thing I want is to be an inconvenience. Josh would probably be heading back to his place with Jim, and I don’t want to infringe on Tyler and Jenna’s time together in their own house.

I text Rhea that I’ll figure something out, then take a deep breath. When I put my phone away and bring myself back to the moment, Tyler has busied himself putting the instruments and cables back where they belong. But Josh is zeroed in on me.

“Everything okay?” He asks once he has my full attention. I contemplate pretending everything is fine and just walking to the nearest coffee shop to wait for Rhea, but once again, the way Josh is looking at me all but forces me to be honest.

“Yeah, Rhea just had to go into work, so I have no way of getting home.” I explain.

“I can drive you.” He doesn’t hesitate to offer me a ride back. But I know that my best friend’s apartment is thirty minutes from here, probably much further from where Josh lives, and the thought of him driving so far out of his way riddles me with guilt.

“That’s okay. Her apartment is pretty far from here, so I don’t want to make you take me all the way over there and back.” I rake my hands through my hair and look at the ground. Josh doesn’t respond for a moment, and when I meet his gaze again, he’s looking at me with soft eyes. He steps closer to me, then says,

“You’re not an inconvenience, Dani.” It’s like he can read my mind. It scares me, but it also makes me want to grow closer to him. It’s a dangerous feeling. I can tell he wants me to voice my anxieties out loud so he can understand, so I do.

“You won’t be able to convince me you’re not just being nice. The whole ride back, I’ll be thinking about how much gas I’m making you use up, how much time you have to take out of your day just to drive me home. I’ll just think you’re secretly annoyed with me no matter what you say.” I admit quietly. I only half-notice that Tyler has gone upstairs to give us privacy while I voice my worst fears out loud to Josh.

“How about this— I can take you back to my place, which is only a few minutes from here, and you can wait for Rhea there. If you’re worried about getting in Tyler and Jenna’s personal space, just come with me. I would be hanging out by myself anyways, so I consider it more important to get to know you since we’ll be together all the time the next couple months.”

“I like that idea.” We smile at each other in understanding, then head upstairs, say goodbye to Tyler and Jenna, load Jim into the car, and head to Josh’s place. Once we pull up in front of his house, he heads inside with Jim while I call Rhea to update her. She answers on the second ring.

“Hey Dani, sorry again I can’t pick you up. Did you get one of the boys to take you back? I left the spare key under the mat for you.” She sounds out of breath, presumably because she’s been rushing around her very understaffed restaurant.

“Don’t worry about it. Actually, I’m hanging out at Josh’s place for a bit. Would you be able to pick me up from here when you get off? I’ll text you the address.” I can almost see her raising her eyebrows suggestively through the phone as she says,

“Hanging out with him alone, huh? Don’t get yourself into too much trouble you sly dog.”

“Oh, shut up.” But I laugh despite myself.

“And yes, I’ll pick you up. See you in a bit!” Rhea hangs up, and I take a deep breath before following Josh inside his house. Seeing his place, the way he decorates, a physical manifestation of him, is much more intense than seeing Tyler’s house. Probably due to this weird instant connection we have.

“Make yourself at home. Do you want anything to drink? Eat?” He asks.

“I’m okay for now. Thanks.” I walk over to his couch and sit down next to the indent that is clearly Jim’s spot. Sure enough, the dog bounds over to me and hops up, placing his head on my lap.

“He likes you.” Josh says with a smile. I scratch behind Jim’s ears, and he wags his tail, thumping it against the couch. Josh fixes himself a glass of water and joins me on the couch. Once again, we’re sitting much closer than necessary, our thighs pressing together. But I don’t mind one bit. Feeling his skin against mine is grounding.

“So, I have an idea. I have this game called We’re Not Really Strangers. It helps you get to know someone; it has three levels to it: perception, connection, and reflection. Each card has a question on it. We’ll take turns drawing cards from each level and asking them to each other. Do you want to play?” I’d heard of the game before, but I’d never played it. I nod, and he leaves the room for a moment to get it. He comes back with a small red box in hand.

“You can go first.” He sits back down next to me and puts his arm behind me on the back of the couch. I lean back against it absentmindedly, and my stomach flutters at the contact. If I didn’t know better, I’d think he ever so slightly moved his hand to brush against my shoulder. I pick out a card from the perception level and read it out.

“Close your eyes. What color are my eyes?” Josh does as I instruct and confidently says,

“Green. It’s the first thing I noticed about you. They’re such an intense color I almost got lost in them.” I knew that he would immediately have the answer, but it still shocks me that he’s already spotted little details about me. He picks a card from the same category.

“What about me would people least expect?” He asks.

“That you’re shy. You push out this aura of extroverted-ness onstage and in interviews, but I can tell you get anxious around crowds and being in the spotlight scares you sometimes. That’s why you know how to comfort people when they’re anxious or overthinking, because you do it yourself.” He bites his lip as I talk, another thing I’ve seen him do in interviews while he’s intently listening to someone.

“Well shit. You have me down to a T.” He says chuckling.

“Like calls to like.” I say, looking deep into his eyes. For a moment, we just look at each other. These moments of silence we have together say more than our words ever could. It’s a sense of understanding, a way of saying I see you. Jim jumps off the couch and goes to grab one of his toys, and we break eye contact.

“Alright, let’s get deeper.” I say, pulling a card from the second level, connection. “When was the last time you felt truly understood by someone?” Josh thinks for a moment before answering.

“The first person in my life who truly knew me was Tyler. The day we met it was like we’d known each other all our lives. We connected musically, but also on a much deeper level that I’d never felt before. We talked for hours that day. I never felt like I had to hide myself around him. It was refreshing, especially when I’d spent my entire life pretending and being shy around everyone else. And recently, I’ve had that exact same connection. With you. I don’t feel it often, but when I saw you onstage singing one of our songs, I felt a pull to you. But then Tyler and I saw that look in your eyes that you were about to have an anxiety attack, and I just knew I had to help you. I’m actually the one that suggested inviting you to tour with us. I practically begged Tyler, because I wanted to get to know you better and this would be my only opportunity. I couldn’t bear the thought of letting you walk out of that bar, because I would never see you again.” For a moment, he looked like he almost regretted being so honest with me. I put a hand on his arm, and he relaxed, realizing he hadn’t said the wrong thing.

“Thank you. For being real with me, and also for helping me with no questions asked. I honestly figured that Tyler had come up with the idea, but now I get it. I wanted to know you too. I want to know both of you.” I keep my hand on his arm and lightly stroke his skin with my thumb. Goosebumps appear on every area I touch, and I suck in a breath. I didn’t realize I affected him this much. He returns the gesture with the hand that’s been lightly resting on my shoulder. He shifts even closer to me as I trace the lines on his tattooed forearm. Josh hooks a finger under my chin and lifts it up so I meet his eyes. He’s glancing down at my lips, a look that clearly says I want to kiss you. And I want to, so badly, but I shouldn’t. It’s too soon. We’re still in the beginning stages of our friendship, or whatever this is. But if he gets any closer to me, I won’t be able to resist. I pull back ever so slightly and say,

“It’s your turn.” He blinks and clears his throat.

“Oh, yeah.” Josh also grabs a card from the connection level and reads it aloud. “How would you describe the feeling of being in love in one word?” There are so many things I could say. Warm, exciting, comforting. But one word sticks out that I settle on.

“Intense. There’s a lot of emotions that come with being in love. Sometimes it’s warm and fuzzy, and other times it’s bumpy. But those feelings, especially when you’re with the right person, are intense. When you’re in love with someone, all your feelings are amplified. I guess my description was more than one word, but you get the picture.” Josh nods, in complete agreement. We do a couple more rounds from the second level, then we just start talking unprompted and forget we were even playing. Whatever weirdness there was moments before, where we clearly wanted to kiss each other but wouldn’t make the move, has dissipated. We talk and laugh for hours, until my phone starts ringing on the coffee table. I pick it up and hear Rhea’s cheerful voice on the other end.

“Hey Dani! I’m outside whenever you want to leave. But by all means, take your time. Wink wink.”

“I’ll be there in a second.” I respond, then hang up the phone. Josh and I stand up, but it’s clear neither of us want me to leave. By now, it’s gotten dark, and tension hangs thick in the air between us. I think we both know it would break a boundary if I stayed any longer, because that meant I’d be spending the night. And I couldn’t do that. Not yet.

“Well, I guess I’ll see you later. Thanks for having me over. And for the game. I think it did its job; we definitely know each other better now.” Josh pulls me in for a tight hug and rests his chin on the top of my head.

“Absolutely. Maybe you’ll have to play it with Tyler next time.” He grins at me and ruffles my hair playfully. I pet Jim goodbye, then head outside to Rhea’s car. Josh makes sure I get in okay, then waves.

“So, tell me all the juicy details. Did you guys make out?” Rhea asks eagerly.

“No, you idiot. We’ve barely known each other for two days. We just talked.”

“Just talked? I find that hard to believe. How could you resist a beautiful man like that?”

“Believe me, it was difficult. We almost kissed, but it’s too early. There was some physical contact though.” She immediately presses me for more details. “He had his arm behind me, and his hand was on my shoulder, I had my hand on his arm tracing his tattoo. We hugged. Nothing crazy.” Rhea looks at me like she was clearly expecting more.

“Almost kissed?! You should have done it.”

“I know, I know. I just don’t want to ruin anything. Since I’m going to be around them every day for months, I don’t want things to get messy by getting romantically involved with Josh.” As soon as the sentence leaves my mouth, I realize I hadn’t told Rhea I agreed to go on tour with them.

“Whoa whoa whoa, go back. You mean you took the job?” She’s looking at me with her mouth agape.

“Yes, Rhea! Now keep your damn eyes on the road!” I shout while laughing. She pulls up in front of her apartment building, gets out, and flings my door open to hug me. She lifts me up and spins me around in excitement.

“Congratulations, Dani! That’s amazing! You’re going to have so much fun. When do you leave?”

“In order to tell you, I kind of need to be able to breathe.” I say in a strained voice. She’s hugging me so tight it feels like my ribs are going to cave in.

“Right, sorry. I’m just happy for you!” We head up to her apartment while I explain everything.

“I leave in a week. I’ll be rehearsing and practicing the songs endlessly until then.”

“That’s fantastic. Seriously, I think you made the right choice. This will be so good for you. Plus, more unsupervised time with Josh.” She winks at me, and I roll my eyes. No one is pushing for us to be together more than Rhea. Except maybe Tyler. Those two would have a time together.

“Well, Tyler will probably be there most of the time.” I point out.

“I’m sure he won’t mind. If he’s anything like me, he’s rooting for his best friend’s happiness.” Once we’re inside, my phone buzzes with a text from Josh. Rehearsal is at Tyler’s house tomorrow at 11. Do you want to have breakfast beforehand? Rhea sees me grinning like an idiot at my phone and asks me to show her.

“Ooo, is this a date perchance?”

“You can’t just say perchance. And I’m not sure.” I respond and tell him that I’d love to go to breakfast. He texts back, Great! I’ll pick you up at 9. I send him Rhea’s address, so he has it for the morning.

I go to bed giddy about tomorrow’s events: breakfast alone with Josh, then more rehearsal time with Josh and Tyler. A week ago, I never would have thought this would be my life. I almost can’t believe I was so devastated about my band breaking up a few days ago. It seems like a lifetime away that I was arguing with Flynn and Lukas about song changes. The universe must have seen my pain and produced this opportunity for me. A way of saying I deserve better than two bandmates who treated me like shit. Now, I have two bandmates who are eager to help me and have me musically involved in their already well established music career. The only problem is, I can’t stop thinking about one of them.

[inkrabbit]

A Picnic for Amore Mio

Summary: Terzo decides to drag you away from your dishes to take you on a date. Too bad he's already gotten under everyone's skin beforehand.

Word count: 1,573

You’re finishing up the dishes, having piled them up on the dish rack so they could drip dry. You’ve been at it for about half an hour, and you’re more than happy to see parts of the silver sink pop through the remainder of your dishes.

“Uccello canoro,” You look up, seeing Secondo nodding to you. “have you, by any chance, seen Terzo?”

“No, Papa. I’m sorry.” He scoffs, throwing his hand up.

“Non posso credere a quel piccolo bastardo!” he growls, face upturned in a sneer. “Dopo tutto quello che gli ho permesso di farla franca, non può fare questa cosa!”

It’s been a long time since you’ve seen him this upset, but he recovers quickly, taking in a deep breath.

“I’m sorry, uccello canoro.” You give him a smile.

“Have you asked his ghouls?” you ask, “They might know where he is.”

“Hmm, sì. I suppose I can try and find Omega. Grazie, uccello canoro.” He gives you a smile and another nod. “Don’t work too hard, ah?”

“Of course not, Papa. Good luck!” And with that, he’s gone. You can still hear him muttering under his breath, the angry Italian making you laugh. Terzo had seemed distracted lately. Though he refused to admit it, you could see, in real-time, the moment he would mentally check out of a conversation and think about something else. He had done the same thing to Sister Imperator once, jumping with her hand made contact with his face, the makeup smearing just a bit from the impact. He pouted for the rest of the day after that, drinking up the attention he got from the other siblings. Maybe he was just hiding away somewhere to collect his thoughts.

You go back to your dishes. The youngest of the trio certainly was a character, but you always loved his charm and his silly little jokes. You had been to a couple of his rituals too, and you loved the way he controlled the crowd, prancing around onstage, though you did notice how accident-prone he was. You never knew if he did it for the extra attention, or if he genuinely was just that clumsy.

When you set the last dish on the rack, you dry your hands off on your habit. This all would’ve been so much easier if you had help, but everyone else was too busy. Or so they said. Sometimes you wondered if the other siblings enjoyed giving you more work.

“Ah, there you are, cara mia!” Terzo walks into the kitchen, looking this way and that. You give him a smile.

“Papa Secondo was just in here looking for you,” you tell him. “He’s real upset, you know.”

“Ah, mio fratello will be fine!” he assures you, waving his hands. “Listen, I have a very special favor to ask of you.”

Of course he did. “And what would that be, Papa?”

“Come, come!” He seems excited now, though he’s still rushing you. He grabs your hand, gently tugging you away from the sink.

“Papa, my dishes!”

“They’ll be there when we’re done!” His shoes tap against the tile and you can tell he’s doing his best to keep quiet. He’s still looking around, like he’s a child that’s broken his mother’s favorite vase.

“What has gotten into you?” He leads you out of the abbey, shooting you one of his famous smiles.

“It’s a surprise, cara mia!” he tells you, pride soaking his voice. “I’ve worked very hard to set this all up for us. I don’t want to spoil it now!”

You suppose that’s the most you’ll get out of him. The two of you walk past the garden, Terzo having stopped abruptly so you bumped into his back. He was looking around the corner before proceeding, having put a finger up to his lips when one of Secondo’s ghouls had spotted him before shooing him away. The poor ghoul had nodded, turning his heels and walking off in the other direction.

“How nice is it that the ghouls obey every command!” He grins as you two pass through the gardens and beyond the parlor. On the outskirts of the graveyard, you finally see it: a black and white plaid blanket laid out across the trimmed grass, a closed basket sitting on top. Terzo glances back at you, his face lit up when you finally realize what he’s done.

“Papa-”

“I hope you like it.” He still holds onto your hand, finally letting go as you sit down on top of the blanket. “I remembered some of the dishes you said you liked and wanted to cook them for you.”

“All by yourself?” You grin when he sputters softly, lips pursed.

“Well… Omega and Water might’ve helped,” he responds softly.

“Everything looks perfect, Papa. Thank you.”

“Ah, there you go again, calling me ‘Papa’! Please, when it’s just us, amore mio, you can call me Terzo.”

“Well, if you insist. Thank you, Terzo.”

He seems pleased, sitting upright with his chest puffed out and his head held high. There was the Terzo you knew; the charming, proud gentleman that had an ego. It’s the same reason why so many others loved him, too.

The ceramic plates clatter inside the basket as he gets everything ready, letting you pile on your food first before he takes any. A thought suddenly crosses your mind.

“Are you the reason why I had more dishes to do than normal?” you ask him. Even under his makeup, you know his face is heating up just by the look in his different-colored eyes.

“I may be, sì,” he confesses softly. “But! I had a good reason for it!”

You laugh and finally start eating. Everything is still warm and, as promised, to your liking. How sweet that he remembered all of this.

“Is there a special reason why you’ve done all of this?” you finally ask him. He takes a moment to look at you, swallowing his food.

“I feel like you and I don’t spend much time together,” he confesses. “I thought that should change. And what better way than to have a picnic!”

“Out of all of the other siblings, you chose me.”

“The other siblings are ah… I’ve forgotten how to say it in English…” You can see the light bulb flicker on over his head when he thinks of it. “Flings! I believe you would call them flings!”

You laugh and nod your head. “If you mean that they’re short, little sexual encounters; then yes. They would be flings.”

“I got it right!” He seems so proud of himself, but his demeanor changes to a more serious one. “I do not wish for you to be a fling, amore mio.”

You’re stunned as you sit there, his lips pulling back into a smile when you realize exactly what he’s asking. His arms raise, sweeping over the entire setting. “After all, I would never treat a fling to such a date!”

“So you kidnapped me from my dishes to take me on a date?” you laugh. He nods proudly.

“But of course! Aren’t you having more fun here?” He cocks his head, still maintaining his smile. “Unless the dishes are better company than your own Papa?”

“Well, the dishes have never surprised me before.” You two share a laugh before you finally give him a nod. “I am having fun, Terzo. Really, I appreciate all of this.”

“And there’s more to come,” he promises you. Your heart flutters at how soft he tells you that. “What do you say, amore? Just you, me, and whatever your little heart desires.”

It sounded like a dream come true. Who wouldn’t want to be Terzo’s first (and hopefully only) choice? But before you can explain that to him, his name is being screamed. The fear and surprise that washes over him match you, Sister Imperator marching over to you two.

“Oh no…” Terzo stands up, his hands raised in defense as she draws closer. “Sister, I can explain-”

“So this is where you’ve been hiding?!” She reaches out, taking his ear between her thumb and index finger. “Need I remind you that you have a tour coming up?”

“I just thought-”

“You’re not thinking about what’s important!” Her gaze snaps down to you. “And you! I clearly recall your chores not being fully done!”

“I-I’m sorry, Sister.” She lets out a huff, tugging Terzo away from you, ranting and raving about how he’s been neglecting practice and paperwork. You didn’t know it was that bad, but you hear Terzo call to you that he’ll get one of his ghouls to help you pack up. Well, there went your cute little date. You should’ve known something would’ve happened with how upset Secondo had become.

You start packing up the food, putting everything back into the basket. As promised, you noticed Alpha jogging up to you as he properly fixed his mask to his face.

“Terzo said you uh… you’d need some help?” You give him a smile, nodding your head. He helps you pile everything into the basket, closing the lid before folding up the blanket. Really, he insisted on doing all of the work once he got there. “It’s what I was summoned for.” he tells you. When he slips the blanket on top of the basket, he holds his arm out, asking if you’re ready. You link your arm with his, walking back to the abbey.

Translation:

Uccello canoro - Songbird Non posso credere a quel piccolo bastardo! Dopo tutto quello che gli ho permesso di farla franca, non può fare questa cosa! - I can't believe that little bastard! After all I've let him get away with, he can't do this one thing! cara mia - my darling mio fratello - my brother amore mio - my love

[avatarmerida]

Playing the Part

Okay, warning this is very cringe. This is one of my favorite tropes and it’s cheesy and like there’s no reason for it I just like making Hunter sweat. I feel like the bit I wrote this around would do better as a comic but I can’t draw so have some Huntlow with no stakes.

———

“I can’t do this Luz, I’m freaking out,” Hunter muttered as he paced frantically, ringing his hands. His suit suddenly felt as though it was suffocating him. “Is it hot in here? Why is it so hot in here?”

“Hunter, you can do this,” Luz confirmed, decked head to toe in black and wearing a headset since she was responsible for coordinating the whole thing. Everyone knew Hunter would be the most challenging part of the evening, which is why no one else had volunteered. “Willow is out there waiting for you, do you really wanna keep her waiting at the alter?”

“No! No, of course I don’t,” Hunter said, his fear of letting her down more powerful than his anxiety.

“Then you need to pull yourself together!” Luz exclaimed, shaking him as hard as she could without causing brain damage. “You care about Willow don’t you?”

“More than anything.”

“Then just chill.”

“Chill? How am I supposed to chill when it’s so hot in here?” Hunter whined, resisting the urge to undo his tie but knew he wouldn’t be able to get it looking perfect twince. “This is the most important day of my life; everything has to be perfect! This is-.”

“Hunter!” Luz yelled, taking him by the shoulders “It’s literally no big deal. You’re just acting. You and Willow are pretending to get married in a flashback while the narrator sets up the scene. This is the only scene you guys are in, you’re essentially props.”

“I know but... have you seen Willow in the wedding dress?” Hunter gulped. “She just looks so... so...”

“Man, it’s a good thing you don’t have any lines because I don’t think you’ve completed one sentence so far.” She heard voices in her header and stopped to listen. “All right, got it. They’re ready for you now Hunter, time to get in place.”

Hunter turned to walk onstage but at the same time so did Willow from the other side. Once she walked into the hot stage lights, the literal spotlight made him seem like an Angel and took all the air out of Hunter’s lungs. Luz groaned (though a part of her was touched and she knew she would tease him about this later) and had to literally push him to his mark because his legs stopped working.

Were the lights always this hot? Hunter was sweating so much he felt like he was going to faint. Luckily, Willow just chalked it up to stage fright.

“You look handsome,” said Willow quietly, placing her hand on his arm to steady him as they got into place, the curtains about to rise.

“Really? Thanks.” Hunter asked, glancing around as the main actors took their spots. Just stand here, he thought, all you have to do is stand here. But they were standing center stage and soon all eyes would be on them. The lights above them dimmed as the scene began and the spotlight shone on the narrator in the very front. “A-are we allowed to talk?”

“Well technically no, but we don’t have mics so they can’t hear us,” whispered Willow.

“Oh, well you look radiant,” breathed Hunter almost too quiet for her to hear and she blushed at his bold word choice, hoping the darkness made it less obvious. He had seen the dress before when the costume department had first finished it but then he could only imagine how beautiful it would look on her. Then she had worn it at the run through but this was the first time he had seen her in it with it all put together, her hair and makeup done and the final touches finalized. This school really went all out for the arts and Hunter was grateful.

“Thanks.”

“And I like the flowers you chose.” He knew she had picked the flowers because they were far too extravagant and full to have been thrown together by anyone else.

“Thank you!” She beamed. “I know it’s kinda silly since no one can really see them back here, but I made sure the flowers represented their relationship. Tulips for true love, carnations for good fortune and snapdragons to represent their courtship since that was full of ups and downs. I also put in proteas for change since after the wedding they had to leave their kingdom.”

“They smell amazing too,” smiled Hunter, always happy to hear her talk about her passions.

“I also brought you a sedum flower to put in your pocket because it represents a broken heart healing, since he thought she was dead and then proposed when he found her hiding in the mountains,” explained Willow, leaning closer to carefully place the flower in his jacket pocket. “Just don’t tell the props master, I didn’t clear any of this with them.”

“Your secret’s safe with me,” he smiled, impressed. “Wow, it’s like you summarized the entire play with plants.”

“Oh, yeah I should be careful with the spoilers in case there’s a botanist in the audience,” considered Willow. “Do you think it’s too much?”

“No, I think it’s perfect,” said Hunter. “Just like youuuuu always managed to make the bouquets look, huh. Yeah, that’s what I meant.”

“Yeah, that’s what you meant,” smiled Willow, turning her attention to the scene in front of them. The spotlight reached the other scene around them, depicting the different stages of the characters’ relationship before the okay went more in depth. It was almost their turn.

“Thanks for doing this by the way,” Willow went on, adjusting her grip on her heavy bouquet. “I know it’s silly, being such a small role but this play is based on one of my favorite stories-.

“The Florist and the Prince,” finished Hunter.

“Yeah!” said WIllow, almost too loudly and she quickly adjusted her volume. “And I wanted to be a part of it anyway I could and you look so much like the prince so I-.”

“No problem, Captain,” said Hunter, standing up straighter at the idea of her comparing him to a prince. It was different from when Darius would do it, which is probably why he had agreed so easily as asked zero follow up questions.

“I think it’s almost time for us to kiss.”

“What?” Hunter stuttered, his eyes wide and his face as red as the tulips in Willow’s bouquet. “I don’t remember that in the script! I mean, we never rehearsed that! I don’t- should we-? I mean, is that what my character would do? The director seemed really against improvising, but-.”

“Hunter, I’m kidding!” Willow said, this time she became flustered. She had expected him to joke back but when he started considering it, she started focusing on the image of them in the moment and how it would technically make sense for the scene, but-

“Oh, yeah I’m kissing too, I mean kissing, kidding! I’m kidding!” Hunter laughed, nervously. “Because we’re getting married, in the play. That’s why you said that. That makes sense, but we’re just kidding.”

“Now, remember all we have to do is look at each other and pretend to be in love,” said Willow, repeating the director’s words.

“Yeah,” said Hunter taking a deep breath, “We’re just acting.”

As she spoke, the lights came on them as the narrator spoke about the scene they represented “... and in the end, they come back to each other. After lifetimes, lies, loss they find each other again. They start their new life together, find their happy ending. But it’s not the end for them, just another beginning. When love is as true as this, nothing can stop...”

Hunter and Willow stared at each other just as the stage directions said to. But Hunter felt woozy, still not sure if the hot lights he stood under wehe entirely to blame. He tried to distract himself, he wondered if this was before or after the vows. What would their vows sound like? The characters, that is. Willow would probably know, she knew every version of this story. She loved these characters. He bet in her real life vows she would quote them. What would he say? No, he was supposed to be distracting himself not thinking about their wedding. Not that thinking about Willow's wedding meant he was thinking about his wedding. Because that would mean-

“Hunter, you’re out of focus,” whispered Willow. “Step back into the spotlight.”

“Huh?”

“Here,” she said, reaching out to grab his hands and bring her closer so they were beneath the spotlight together once more. The light hit Willow’s glasses and made her eyes look like lily pads and they pulled him even closer without force. He had been stressing over this moment for days but now that he was here he could float here forever. Willow gave him a small smile, seeing his discomfort leaving and felt herself becoming caught in the moment as well.

“Shoot,” she said under her breath. “My glasses are slipping and it’s making me dizzy. My hands are full, do you think you could-.”

“I do,” said Hunter, swiftly pushing the frames back in their proper place. “Do you feel better?”

“I do,” she breathed. She was going to ask him to hold the flowers but she wasn’t about to complain.

They were closer now than they were before and Willow held onto his hand tighter even though she didn’t have to anymore. She looked up at him with shining eyes as the narrator spoke about true love conquering all and stood closer to him and admired how his hair looked even more gold right now. She didn’t realize she was such a good actress as she truly felt herself sink into the role, it was like no one else existed except for her and Hunter.

“Get off the stage!” Luz stage whispered, the frustration in her indicating this was not the first time she had tried to get their attention. “Your scene is over! Move, move, move!”

“Let’s go!” Willow said with wide eyes as she turned to run off stage and pulled Hunter behind her who was happy to follow her.

“You did great,” laughed Willow as they made it off the stage right before the next scene needed to start, just in time. They attempted to keep their voices hushed as it was becoming noticeable and distracting.

“Thanks, you too.”

“Shh!!”

“Quiet!”

“No talking backstage!”

The hushes from the stagehands only made them laugh more. Willow, still holding Hunter’s wrist, pulled him towards the door as they were rushed out the door by the stage crew who were tired of their chattering and needed to get them out of the way.

The props master, who did notice and care very much about Willow going rogue with the bouquet, threw pieces of confetti reserved for the next scene at them to further prove the point that they needed to leave.

“This was fun,” said Willow, grabbing the ends of her long dress so she could walk easier. “We should do this again in a couple years.”

“You wanna do another play?” Hunter asked holding the door open for her.

“No,” said Willow with a smile, gently tossing him her bouquet before walking outside.

[ptergwen]

no sleep

pairing: singer!reader x tom holland || w/c: 1.6k

warnings: swearing and many many many suggestive jokes

summary: you’re on jimmy kimmel to talk about your music, but he has other plans

a/n: y’all i’ve literally always wanted to write singer!reader and this idea just came to me and i had to get it out because it’s so cute :,) i really hope ya like it

-

jimmy kimmel invited you onto his show to promote a single from your upcoming album. you stepped out of the spotlight for a while, so this is your first official appearance of the year.

“my first guest tonight...” there’s a cheer from the audience. you grin to yourself, waiting for jimmy to finish announcing you.

“you wanna say it for me?” he chuckles and stands your picture up on his desk. “my first guest tonight surprised fans this morning with her new single ‘no sleep.’ it’s currently number one in over seventy countries.” jimmy holds for applause, which you get a ton of. you cover your hot face with your hands.

“she’s here to talk to us about the song and her short hiatus. please welcome y/n y/l/n!”

the music plays while you walk onstage, followed by more cheers and clapping. you’re beaming as you wave to everyone. you give jimmy a quick hug and exchange hello’s over the noise.

you’ve been in the industry for a few years, but you’ll never get used to responses like this. all the love really warms your heart.

“thank you!” you giggle out, taking your seat on the couch. the audience yells some more when the music dies out. “thank you so much! oh my god,” you make a face at jimmy, who laughs and gestures to everyone. “they clearly hated the song,” he jokes to you. “i was gonna say,” you agree, smoothing your dress down.

you look out at the crowd with a pout. “no, seriously. you guys are so cute.” jimmy copies your pout, earning a playful eye roll from you.

you’ve been on the show a couple of times before, so you two are friendly. tom has also brought you to chill backstage with him when he was a guest. you would’ve brought him this time if he wasn’t away for filming.

“so, you took most of the year off from making music,” jimmy starts the actual conversation. “mhm, i did,” you hum and cross one of your legs over the other. “how was that? was it weird not being in the studio?” you scrunch your face up, then he adds another question. “what did you actually do with yourself?”

“i mean, music is obviously a big part of who i am. making it, loving it, all that stuff.” a small smile crosses your face. “so, yeah. it sort of felt like something was missing at first.” jimmy nods along, you shrugging one of your shoulders.

“at the same time, i really needed to take a minute and just breathe. come back with my shit more together. i think i have,” you let out a reflective sigh. “it didn’t have anything to do with your boyfriend? a mr. tom holland?” jimmy teases, you waving a hand at him. “no, don’t give him all the credit.”

your break genuinely was for yourself. no one needs to know that tom was also off, or that he spent all his free time with you. that was just a plus.

“are you sure? because, it seemed like you two were getting really cozy.” a picture from your instagram pops up on the screen. it’s of tom under a blanket. he’s reaching out for you with a lazy smile. you lean over on the couch so you’re off camera, another giggle escaping you.

jimmy flips to another picture. “that was exhibit A. here’s exhibit B.” the whole audience coos, jimmy raising his eyebrows at you. this one is a mirror selfie from tom’s instagram. your arms are slung around his neck from behind, and half your face is hidden. tom is doing his signature eye crinkling smile into the camera.

“aren’t they just adorable?” jimmy asks the audience, making them erupt in more cheers. you sit up again and clear your throat. seeing those is bittersweet for you. “he’s very cuddly. anyway, back to the music!” you do a small clap. little do you know, there’s much more to come.

“yes, yes. back to the music. talk to me about ‘no sleep.’” the song is one hundred percent about tom. you’re not sure you should say that, considering the... explicit content in it. you and tom did get very cozy over your break, as jimmy would say. it was the only time you weren’t relaxing.

“well,” you plaster on an overly happy smile. that earns more laughter from jimmy. “it’s about what you do in bed when you’re, um, not sleeping,” you explain. “and who do you do those things in bed with?” jimmy glances up at the screen again. “you’re choosing violence today, jimmy,” you say under your breath.

there’s a chuckle from backstage that sounds eerily similar to tom’s. it must have been a PA. all this talk about him is seriously fucking with your head.

“well, everyone in my life inspires my work in some way. they’re such angels,” you dodge the question, thinking you’re clever about it. jimmy won’t let you get off that easy. “friends? family?” he asks you. “yeah, everyone,” you exhale in relief. jimmy widens his eyes at you. “so, that means ‘no sleep’ is about your mom?”

your mouth falls open. he’s really going to make you spill the details of your sex life.

“what the fuck, no!” you squeal, looking out into the audience for help. they join in your laughter. “it’s about tom,” you finally confirm so jimmy doesn’t suggest anything else. “it’s about tom, my god. next topic.” you’re smiling despite yourself.

“why? don’t you wanna tell us more about your lover?” jimmy glances off to the side. what is going on back there? you sit up straighter in your spot. “no, this is my interview!” you’re half joking, half serious.

although you and tom aren’t private at all, you’ve never talked about him this much. it’s overwhelming. besides that, this is making you miss him a lot.

“that’s too bad. we thought... we thought you might like to share it,” jimmy is already grinning about whatever he has planned. this isn’t supposed to be part of your segment. “huh? i’m literally so lost.” you furrow your eyebrows at him, lowering your voice. “we didn’t talk about this.”

he pats the arm of your couch. “they say there’s no time like the present. ladies and gentlemen, tom holland!”

on cue, tom runs out from backstage. the audience practically roars with how loud they are. people even jump out of their seats. you clasp a hand over your mouth in pure shock. this feels like a prank, like jimmy is about to say sike. then, tom comes up to the couch. you almost fall over, jimmy proudly watching on.

tom grins so wide it takes up his whole face. “happy release day,” he murmurs as you get to your feet. you’re not able to speak just yet, only staring up at him with glossy eyes. he brings you into a tight hug. his hands rub up and down your back, your arms snaking around his middle.

“tommy,” you try to whisper the nickname. you forgot your microphone is on. everyone “aw’s” at you both, including jimmy. “my love,” tom’s lips brush your cheek briefly. “hi, baby,” he speaks into your ear. you hide your face in his button up while he rocks you side to side.

he’s been away for a couple of months working on the third spider-man. this is the first time you’ve seen him since he left.

“shouldn’t you be in atlanta?” you ask louder this time for the audience to hear. you’re still doing an interview. “today’s a big day. i had to see you,” tom gives you one last squeeze. “in person,” he adds, before you can say you already facetimed.

the fact that him and jimmy put this whole thing together is making you emotional. you’d be fully crying if you two were alone right now.

“she doesn’t want you here, though. remember?” jimmy chimes in, tom breathing out a laugh. he sadly lets go of you. you flop back onto the couch, tom pointing behind him with his thumb. “i’ll just be on my way. five hour flight, no big deal.” “no, no, no, no. stay,” you whine and make grabby hands at him.

that’s all it takes for tom to slip into the spot next to you. he bites back a smile, putting an arm around you and the couch. you don’t want to annoy everyone with too much pda, so you subtly curl into his side. the people actually love you and tom together. jimmy claps his hands.

“we’ll be right back with y/n y/l/n and tom holland!” he says into the camera, the band playing more filler music. he steps out from behind the desk to greet tom. tom stands up, the two of them giving each other pats on the back. the camera stops rolling.

“hey, man. thanks for doing this,” tom puts a hand on jimmy’s arm. “anything for the happy couple. i’m gonna get some water, see you in five.” jimmy shoots you another smile on his way to his dressing room. you return it. that leaves you and tom to yourselves.

“baby,” you say in a sing song voice, dropping your head onto tom’s shoulder. “i’m so happy you’re here. i real life almost peed when you came out.” tom snakes his arm around your waist. “that would be upsetting,” he mumbles, his index finger drawing circles on you. “it would’ve ruined your very pretty dress.”

“you like it?” you knowingly tug at the form fitting material. tom shifts in his spot. “i’ll tell you what,” he leans in closer to you with a smirk, his breath tickling your ear. “we’re getting no sleep tonight,” he sings from the chorus of your song. you burst into a giggle and squeeze your eyes shut.

he ends up being right.

[moonysimp]

Happier —lando norris.

summary: a one shot / dual pov fic where y/n is a famous singer and she and lando broke up but still have feelings for each other. but after she sees him with another girl she dedicates him a song in her concert and he finds out and goes to talk to her.

I. (y/n pov)

headlines. articles. tweets.

it all came out in the worst possible time.

everybody was talking about the same thing.

"f1 driver lando norris spotted with the model lauren christensen"

"after his four year relationship ended, lando norris has been seen very close with the model lauren christensen. could this be a new beginning for norris?"

"did lando norris get over his ex that quickly? 4 months after he publicly announced his breakup with the singer y/n mendez, norris has been seen in public places with the armani model lauren christensen"

it hurt. it hurt more than anything else. and also the fact that it was everywhere wasn't helping.

everybody is different, and some people heal faster than others. you should be happy he's happy, y/n. you have a tour to deal with right now, you can't sit here and scroll on twitter to punish yourself more than you already have. get up, put down that ice cream and your phone and think of something else. literally anything else but him.

i get up, put the ice cream on the little fridge beside my bed, throw my phone across the room, and go to the shower. maybe a shower is what it takes to wash away all the memories flooding my mind. his smile. his scent. they way his eyes get small when he smiles. his cute and silent laugh. his voice. all his little moles. his hands and how he promised that he would hold me forever. no matter what.

well i guess he's holding her now. i guess this is my sign to move on.

only if it were that easy.

II. (y/n pov)

two days have passed since the news came out. and now i have to go through this specific weekend knowing that he is most likely with her. i have been trying not to think about it but it's inevitable. the USA tour has finally reached texas, and so has the formula 1 calendar.

i used to joke around with him saying that i would love to perform in the same place that he gets to race. it never happened when we were together and now that we are not together anymore, here we are. lucky me.

as i'm on my way to sound check for the concert tonight, i can't help to look up the results for qualifying. ever since we broke up i can't bring myself to watch a race, but i like to keep track of how he's doing. he's been getting better and better this season and for the first time in years mclaren might be onto the championship, with lando on second position in the driver's championship, only 16 points below leclerc. i wonder how he must be feeling since this is huge, not only for him but for the whole team. mclaren means so much to him and i can't even fathom what it must be like to give them a championship.

i wish i could be there for him.

enough.

two voices in my head battle as i get off the car and enter the stadium. i have work to do, but i also can't stop praying for him to do well on today's race. i shake my head and i focus on what's important right now. i want my fans to have the best night ever so i'm gonna make sure everything is set up and ready for tonight.

III. (y/n pov)

he won. he won and all i can think about is how i can't celebrate with him. how she gets to do it. how she gets go hold him tonight.

that's why i decide to make a last minute change on the setlist.

...

"all right, texas. how are we feeling so far?"

the crowd cheers as kyle gives me a chair so i can sit onstage.

"this next song i'm gonna play for y'all tonight is actually a cover. this song is about… heartbreak."

a little smile touches my lips as the crowd screams like i knew they would. we all love a bit of drama. and just like i know my fans respect my privacy, i also know they love when i give them little sights of my personal-and specially-my romantic life.

"this song is for those people that leave your side, and how a part of you is still in love with them, even after they're long gone. I do believe that some people come into your life to completely change it, and it's incredible how they leave a mark in you. i think it's beautiful but also really fucking painful." I laugh a bit alongside the crowd.

"it's hard to get over that kind of people. and it's even harder when you know they did get over you. specially when you know they did it by meeting someone else." tears start to form in your eyes. "so i decided to let all my feelings out tonight, texas, and open up to all of you. this is happier by miss olivia rodrigo, sing it with me." and so i start singing my heart out. to him. to the fans. to anyone who will listen. they say music heals the soul, and god knows i could use some healing right now.

You've moved on, found someone new

One more girl who brings out the better in you

And I thought my heart was detached

From all the sunlight of our past

But she's so sweet, she's so pretty

Does she mean you forgot about me?

Oh, I hope you're happy

But not like how you were with me

I'm selfish, I know, I can't let you go

So find someone great, but don't find no one better

I hope you're happy, but don't be happier

a couple of songs later the concert ends. i jump on the car to go to my hotel room. today drained me. i haven't felt this tired in quite some time. but this is good. if i'm this tired it means overthinking everything will be hard, because shit will be going down after tonight. i don't think people will ignore the fact that i kinda just dedicated a whole song to my ex-famous-formula 1-driver-boyfriend. but who cares? i needed to let it out of my system. besides i don't even think he will see it. he must be too busy celebrating his win.

IV. (lando pov)

*a couple of hours before the concert*

"LANDO NORRIS WINS THE 2022 TEXAS GRAND PRIX, GIVING HIM THE #1 POSITION AT THE DRIVER'S CHAMPIONSHIP"

i raise my fist as i pass the checkered flag. i can't believe it. i won. i'm leading the driver's championship. i cheer for the team, for me, for all the fans out there. as i get off the car i run to my team, i hug them all, tears running down my face. as they let me go i look around, searching for someone, needing one more hug. it takes me a second to remember.

she's not here. you two broke up.

i blink several times, remembering how y/n is not here. and hasn't been here since we broke up. my head is spinning and my heart hurts for a moment. but in a minute, the other drivers are all over me, congratulating me on this huge win.

after a lot of press i get on my car and start driving to my hotel room. i can't help but smile, since this day has been amazing. definitely one of the best days of my entire life. but that little void is still there. because i know she's not here. and there is no one in this world that i would love to celebrate more with, than her. the worst part is that she is actually here, in this city, just not with me. and it hurts. the thought doesn't leave me as i park the car and enter the lobby of my hotel.

she's playing here in texas, that i know. it might not be good for me to keep up with her tour schedule but i crave to know what she's up to. i haven't been to one of her concerts. it's impossible for me-mentally and physically- since i'm traveling around the world. but i can't forget how we used to talk about a situation like this, where we both could be able to be there for each other. a concert in the same city as a grand prix. and now is happening and we can't enjoy it together.

i would be lying if i said I'm over her. as much as my friends tell me to get out there and find someone else, i can't do it. the biggest thing i've done is going out with lauren, following team orders. the press needed something to focus on that wasn't how my team mate daniel was doing, so they decided to get me and lauren in public places a couple of times to interest the press. and i get it, they also tried to set me up with her to see if i could get over y/n. but it's impossible. i tried to see lauren in that way, she's a really nice girl, she's very polite and also quite funny, and it's fair to say she's gorgeous. but she's not her. i wanted to scream to the world that lauren and i meant nothing to each other. If i could i would make video and tell everyone that I'm not over my ex-famous-singer-girlfriend. but that would be... what? a disaster? most certainly.

k seriously need to move on and stop it with these crazy ideas. i just won a fucking grand prix. i'm at the top of my career. i should be out there partying not being miserable here scrolling on twitter.

i think about going out and celebrating but it kinda seems off. and then i see something on twitter that catches my attention. there are a bunch of people tagging me in the same video. i open it up and my eyes widen as i realize it's y/n onstage. and then i listen to what she says.

"this song is for those people that leave your side, and how a part of is still in love with them, even after they're long gone"...

i cover my mouth with my hand the whole video as my heart starts beating faster and faster. this is it.

she still loves me. and i still love her.

i gotta do something about that.

V. (lando pov)

sometimes i don't like to be a public figure, to be recognized all the time when i'm out in public. now is not like that. right now i'm very happy i'm famous. i knew which hotel y/n would be staying at. we were together for four years, of course i remember her favorite one. i get to the lobby and i directly head for the front desk attendant. his eyes light up as he recognizes me and after a couple of words-and the promise of a signed hoodie- he tells me the number of y/n's room. my heart is about to jump out of my chest as i enter the elevator and i press the button of the 12th floor. the elevator doors open after what feels like forever and i start looking for the room #444.

i'm gonna get her back.

i knock on her door with a shaky hand. and after a couple of seconds the door opens. and i'm staring at her brown eyes. i can't help but think of how pretty she is. of how much i've missed her. how wrong it was for us to break up, no matter how difficult it was for the relationship to be 100% stable.

"four months. four months and thirteen days ago, if i'm not mistaken. that's the day we called it off. we decided to part ways because we both were so busy with our lives and our uprising success that we couldn't find a way to stay together and spend as much time as we needed with each other. i let you go and i'll be damned if i didn't think that was the worst thing i've ever done."

she opens her mouth to speak but i don't let her, because i need to let it all out before all the courage leaves me.

"i tried to move on. partly because i supposed you were too. but it was useless. i still look for you after every race. i still wish to hug you after every win. i miss to wake up beside you. i miss your voice. your way to see the world. i miss feeling whole again. and i didn't say anything sooner because i didn't want to ruin anything for you in case you had found your peace and had left me behind. but i saw that video today. i saw your speech before that song and i know how much you like to talk about the song you're about to sing. that's when i realized that... maybe it hadn't been hard just for me, but for you too. maybe i wasn't the only one who missed every little thing about you. maybe it's not just me that still loves you. maybe you still love me too."

VI. (y/n pov)

my eyes water as i listen to all the things he's saying to me. he is not with any other girl. he's here, at my door, telling me he still loves me. he finishes his speech and takes a ragged breath. staring at me. i take it all in. his voice. his beautiful eyes. the way he's an inch taller than me. his hair that looks like he's been running his hand on it a million times. and the fact that he hasn't moved on. just like i haven't.

my hands move on their own accord to cup his cheeks. i feel he leans into my palm and he closes his eyes briefly, then he opens them when i start speaking.

"you changed my life, lando norris. with your childish smile and your shiny cars and your heart of gold. of course i still love you. i don't think i'd be able to feel the way i feel about you with anyone else. when i saw you were spotted with that girl i... i thought it was over for us. i thought it was my sign to move on. but here you are." his hands hold mine and he says:

"she means nothing to me. i tried to look at her that way but it was impossible. she isn't you. you're the only person i want to be with. i love you, y/n. that will never change."

i can't stop myself from launching forward and join our lips in a kiss. a kiss that i've been dreaming of for four months and thirteen days. a kiss that not only tells him how much he means to him but tells me how much i mean to him, and how much we've missed each other. the kiss deepens as i take a step back, taking him into the room with me. he closes the door behind him as he places his hands on my hips and pushes me against the right wall of the room. my hands are on his hair, on his neck, on his chest. i can't have enough of him. i can't believe i finally have him back. we break the kiss and join our foreheads together.

"congrats on your win."

"yeah, i'm about to show you how much i want to celebrate it with you." he joins our lips again as he lifts me up and my legs curl around him.

...

i wake up to a sleeping lando by my side. his lips are slightly parted, and he looks so peaceful. i always enjoy to watch him like this, he's such an active person, always running around, making people laugh, driving fast cars. i always find it fascinating to watch him this calm. my hand strokes his cheek and i begin to leave little kisses on the moles on his face. he slowly opens his eyes as i giggle.

"good morning."

"good morning indeed." he gives me a quick kiss.

"it feels a bit surreal to have you here with me", i say, resting my head on his chest.

"i've been dreaming about it for too long. it was about time we came back to each other", he says, stroking my hair with his hand. we stay like this for a while. and then i turn to face him.

"promise me we won't walk away ever again. we will face every challenge, every turn, everything. together." he nods, looking at my lips and then back to my eyes.

"i promise you i'm not letting you go ever again, we can get through everything together."

"and i better never see that armani model near you again, do you hear me?" i tease him. he throws his head back as he laughs. that laugh that could light up a room. i've missed it so much.

"copy. do you have any other requests?"

my hand on his chest slowly makes his way to his navel, getting lower and lower.

"mmhm. box, box, box?"

"i really hope that stands up for sex, sex, sex." we both laugh and then i'm over him, kissing every part of his body. thinking about how much i love this beautiful boy and how everything finally feels right again.

[hopefullystillatheatrestudent]

i'm so excited about you taking asks again ahhhh okay so. if you'd absolutely had to choose. what would be your top 5 cockles moments, and why? thank you ily <3

here’s the thing: there are so many routes i could go down with this, because cockles moments come in all shapes and sizes and formats. these include moments from their panels, their bloopers, the footage we get when they don’t even know they’re being recorded, stories being passed down from photo ops & autographs(one of my personal favorite ways to get cockles, tbh, because they’re all insane), and social media(tweets to each other, instagram posts & comments, etc.). 

SO! since many a list like this has already been made, and i want to stand out from the crowd, what i’m gonna do is definitively give the number one spot to each of these five categories.(i might even throw in honourable mentions because they’re so despicably in love that they warrant that. i really put my whole pussy into this, guys, i hope you’re happy.) 

disclaimer: these are my own personal opinions. but that also means i’m right. so. enjoy. 

number one: top cockles panel moment

so we’re starting off with a bang, because how do you even BEGIN to rank what atrocities jensen and misha commit at jibcon. every single one they’ve had is damning in it’s own right, for different reasons.

however, considering just how much unabashed fuckery they’ve given us to sift through, it’s a good thing i do have a personal favorite despite it all. it’s heartwarming, the sweetest thing i’ve ever seen, AND it’s jarringly cinematic - mainly because it has a whole ass arc to it that was years in the making. it might even be surprising to some people, but my favorite cockles panel moment, and what i consider the one that encompasses their entire gut-wrenching journey from 2008-2013 in the most sweepingly romantic gesture possible, is this one.

i want this burned into my retinas. i am not even joking. when i'm through with my explanation, let me convince you why this is thee most romantic cockles moment of all time.

first, some history: people call this the resume off, but many seem to forget the botched attempt at a resume off a year prior. and yes, you guessed it: it's during their break up. it's a juicy time period for a reason, guys. it came across as exceedingly one-sided and VERY awkward. let me refresh your memory as to just how bad it was, and just how hard jensen was trying and ultimately failing at winning misha over: the funniest part of the whole resume off in 2013??? every joke/bit had literally already been made/done. they were just going through the motions again, but the difference THIS time...is that misha reciprocated jensen's energy. it. is. fascinating. i want to get into it more detail in another post, and i'll link it here when i'm done, but the main takeaway, i think, and the main difference that showcases how much they've grown in a year, is that in jib 3, misha flat out refused to do an accent, and this time around, he indulges jensen for literal minutes. when i tell you they're crazy, they're crazy. i can't wait to actually dive into it later.

ANYWAY, the resume off culminates in this moment here. and, like, a million things happen in this gifset. actually, more like a million and one. the music starts playingneediremindyouthatthesongissingingintherain(h e l p), misha starts dancing, jensen 'perpetually fake grumpy' ackles lets misha think he's not going to join, misha sits down defeated, but no!!! that was jensen's plan all along(look at his stupid fucking smirk) and he offers his arm to his dance partner who immediately grins like a fool, jensen then leads misha into their kick step, they perfectly synchronise and let loose, and are then very clearly having the time of their lives, hanging off of each other with joy and ease. from their expressions alone i can tell that this moment is so. so. so. so! much more than what initially meets the eye. i mean-misha is fighting back the biggest smile i've ever seen. to me, it reads like jensen is offering something to misha, something that misha kind of gave up on expecting, and him offering his arm like that is like, a surprise to him in the best possible way(and it's so not platonic, let me just say that.) as soon as jensen did that, it ushered in a new era of cockles. this panel is jensen and misha's favourite for a reason, and i think this moment is the biggest clue as to why.

whew!!! ok. that took a lot out of me and that was only point one. moving on,

number two: top cockles blooper moment

cockles bloopers hold an extremely special place in my heart, because it shows just how fucking disastrous jensen and misha are. they are so goddamn infatuated with each other that they HOLD UP PRODUCTION ALL THE TIME TO FLIRT WITH EACH OTHER(???). let me repeat. let it sink in. jensen ackles; arguably one of the most professional actors on that show who puts everything he has into each scene, with mountains and mountains of notes to prove it: would rather hold up production to flirt with misha collins. this sounds fake. it's not. he does it. all. the. time. and here's the thing guys!!! i'm gonna let you in on a secret!!! misha loves it. he loveesssss it. on top of that-misha collins: overlooked because he's pranked and people assume he's unprofessional as well, but his only pranks are in retaliation/off-set, and he rarely if EVER causes problems if he can help it....lets himself get carried away when it comes to jensen making kissy faces at him!!! are you actually kidding me!!! i mean. misha. it's just a face. you've seen it a million times. i don't buy that it triggers something in you that strongly....you like it, and you like jensen's reaction. you can't fool me!!! lisa berry's face in that one gifset shows just how fed up the crew is with their gross, coupley boyfriend antics.

i could pull up so many examples. sooooooo many. but my favourite was sealed since the moment i saw it.

i actually already wrote an analysis on it but i can't find it :(((( which SUCKS because i really unpacked the whole thing. i'll try to summarise.

basically, a backstory is part of this too!!! jensen and misha both had a really really hard time with this scene(because it's explicitly romantic there i said it), they sat down for hours and poured over their scripts together, they were super super nervous going into filming, both of them, jensen especially, were super hard on themselves for their performances not being true to their characters but they both complimented the other's work(boyfriend moments fr). so, yeah. they weren't confident going into shooting. and how do they get themselves to feel better???? by cuddling each other, apparently.

a lot. a LOT. happens in this specific blooper. to the point that i saw it years before i knew about cockles and it raised all sorts of flags for me.

1) stop pulling my face towards your crotch(as a thinly veiled request that misha would, in fact, move jensen's face towards his crotch, considering it was jensen moving himself there in the first place. also, why so comfy down there guys???) 2) you're my baby daddy i know(in the most intimate voice i've ever heard please) 3) i know, i know, i love you too i didn't say i love you i know but you wanted to say it etc. misha's right, of course. that's what jensen meant.

it just reeks of comfort, familiarity and intimacy between the two, and it's a moment that is extremely sweet and silly at the same time. they're so <3

number three: top cockles found footage moment

WONDERFUL category. truly the culmination of the cockles experience. many people have said that shipping cockles doesn't work because 'they're just onstage you dummies!! they're playing it up for the audience!!!' here's the thing, love. i could not disagree with you more. once you climb your way up the cockles ladder, you soon learn that they are, in fact, playing their dynamic DOWN, not up. they really are just Like That™, and they could not care less about the paying audience, if we're being honest, considering how much time they take to giggle with each other and refuse to let the audience in on the joke. and i love them for it <3

anyway, my point is that this category is for all you naysayers out there, all you 'jensen and misha's relationship is just for show and is real life queerbaiting'(?????lordhelp???) oh yeah? ok, explain this.

he. he. he calls jensen sweetheart. literally enough said. there's nothing to really add here, except, misha and jared then immediately engage in damage control. jared's method is distraction and misha's is retconning('get out of the car, dude') this was what got me to buy into the cockles dumpster for GOOD good. you don't call your buddy sweetheart accidentally and sound so completely earnest while doing it! especially not when that buddy is jensen ackles!!! you think he would let any of his friends call him that? do you?

one more thing; if it was a slip of the tongue, little mouth thing or whatever, you think jared wouldn't have jumped on it immediately??? i can hear it now. 'did you just call him SWEETHEART???' yeah. that's what i thought. you know why he didn't? because it was too revealing.

number four: top cockles autograph moment

i mean, i think we all know what it's gonna be, and if you don't, well, do i have the piece de cockles resistance that is gonna send you over the edge.

if you haven't heard of this story by now, as a cockles, truther, i'm gonna go ahead and get you to read it, because there is no possible heterosexual explanation for any of it, and you're fooling yourself if you think otherwise.

spoiler alert: it's the story where phones weren't allowed in an auto session, jensen nuzzles himself in misha's hair, leans his full body weight onto him, holds his hand, etc. etc. i'm imploding just repeating this back, actually. also, just, the sheer amount of stories from photo ops where they tackle hug each other or slap each other's asses or sing romantic songs to each other or almost kiss is, frankly, a lot. if i could wish for anything, it would be to witness them in person.

and finally,

number five: top cockles social media moment

this one is super difficult, because there's obviously a lot to choose from. but you know what? full send, i'm going with this one:

i just. what to say about this. how often do misha and jensen watch sunsets together for it to qualify as ‘always’ ??? why are sunsets synonymous with their relationship??? that’s like??? a very romantic thing????? ‘this guy’??? the fact that it’s a CANDID??? i don’t know guys.

that could have been better but i am TIRED so. there you go rose ily

[haikyuuublog]

Haikyuu Theater Kid Headcanons: Karasuno Edition

Kageyama:

Plz the way he’d freeze up and come off super stiff

Like he would just stand there like 🕴

So awkward and sweaty

Gets mad at himself

Has tried to set the props

Played the moon once tho ig so good for him 🤷‍♂️

Daichi:

Director Daichi!!!

Solid actor

Yells a lot

He has to keep all the loud ass mfs in line though so don’t blame him

People have different responses to him yelling: Tsukishima puts in headphones, Suna records it, and Tanaka yells louder to assert dominance

Sugawara told Daichi “I can’t get scared when you yell though because your yelling is kinda hot”

Daichi now only speaks to him in a stern tone

RIP Suga

Sics Ennoshita on anyone who tries to fuck around during practice

Sugawara:

Co Director Sugaaaaa

Has so much chemistry with the other cast members

Playful and lighthearted

Keeps everyone on good terms with each other

At the same time, also is in charge of those chaotic theater kid trips to iHop

They have been kicked out of six iHops so far and are aiming to be kicked out of ten by the time the show is over

Daichi does not know about this. He does wonder why Suga keeps giving him free pancakes, but it’s honestly not the most questionable thing Suga has done

Kiyoko:

Has a beautiful singing voice (ofc)

Helps with management: making schedules, helping with scripts, etc.

So many people just come to see her so she ups the audience count significantly

Gets more applause than most of the actors

Also her and Yachi made a really cute sign saying “break a leg”

She stopped using it though after 3 events

1. Lev actually did break Yaku’s leg with his uncoordinated ass attempting hard choreography

2. Bokuto approached her after practice and had asked, “Do I have to break my leg Kiyoko? I really don’t want to. I feel like it’d hurt a lot.” 😥

3. Tanaka and Nishinoya were ready to break each others’ legs to gain her approval and Daichi had to get in the middle before Tanaka bashed a chair into Nishinoya’s legs

Her influence 😫 truly the baddest of bitches

Ukai:

Saw Kageyama acting for one second and said “I’m gonna need a drink for this”

Told Takeda he signed up to be a coach to volleyball not “whatever the hell is going on here”

Takeda told him to quit because he came into every play practice drunk

Tanaka:

Yells literally everything

Gets so fired up before a performance

Wants to impress the girls in the audience (especially stage manager Kiyoko)

Threatens anyone who looks at Kiyoko

Will straight up growl at anyone who hits on her; he has driven people who were going to audition away because he threatened them

Cannot put this man in stage combat as he will actually deck the other person

Hinata:

Ball of energy

Doesn’t ever stfu. Ever. I mean ever. 

Doesn’t understand when it isn’t his line, he shouldn’t be speaking.

Keeps trying to one-up himself

Yells motivation in the middle of practice. And dress rehearsals. And the actual play.

Stage. Fright. OMFG this man is puking onstage

Voice cracks galore

Gets very antsy when he is not on stage and complains

Sings off-key. Loudly. No shame.

PEP! TALKS!

Nishinoya:

Also wants to impress the girls in the audience and stage manager Kiyoko

So enthusiastic and loud

Is like a human energy drink

This man cannot stand still

He bounces around on stage and will like jump on his castmates’ shoulders

No fight or action scenes for him as he will yell “ROLLING THUNDER” at least one of the times

Gets really focused during the actual performances though

Hype 👏 Man 👏

Takeda:

Tries to give pep talks using all those weird metaphors

Leaves everyone more confused than when they started

Tries to help Hinata pronounce words. One time he taught Hinata the correct pronunciation of a word, and Hinata said, “Well it sounds cooler the other way so I’m gonna say it the other way!”

It’s ok Takeda; you tried your best 😌

Asahi:

Plz u think this man is going onstage 😆

(He actually has a pretty singing voice tho low-key)

Tsukishima:

Literally just makes fun of everybody the whole time

Isn’t even in the play; he just comes to practice to roast the hell out of everyone and then leaves

Smirks every time someone messes up

Literally the worst

Yamaguchi:

Actually wanted to try out for the play, but thought Tsukishima would say it wasn’t cool

He is right tbh

Secretly asks to be an understudy in case somebody dropped out

It’s okay king. You have your jump float and nobody can take that away from you 😌

Yachi:

Villager B

Nah but actually she’d be a costume designer or something- she is definitely helping behind the scenes

Gets more frightened before the show than the actual actors

Ennoshita, Kazuhito, and Kinoshita

Extras

[maybeeatspaghetti]

SO My observations about Little Shop! First of all, let me just say that Christian Borle is an absolute champ. He puts 100% into all his characters (and in Little Shop, he has many in quick succession) and each new one is just as exciting and fresh and interesting and nuanced as the last. If I remember correctly, he plays eight characters (a drunk, a customer, an old man, Orin, Bernstein, Mrs. Luce, Skip Snip, and Patrick Martin—roughly in that order, and I'm NOT counting the narrator because that's likely pre-recorded), and he's absolutely brilliant as each one. I'll just list everything I noticed (mostly about Christian Borle) and hope I haven't forgotten anything!

When he's playing the drunk, he holds the bottle in his arms and cradles it, rocks it, and kisses it like a baby. He plays a very convincing stumbling drunk (he's very shaky on his feet and his depth perception is really off—it takes him three tries to climb one step).

He shows off his ass so much—he just sticks it out constantly when he's playing Orin, whether that's twerking at the audience, or sitting on his knees with his back arched, or crawling across the floor on his hands and knees (which he does a lot). The black jeans he wears are a little tighter than the Marvin jeans, for reference, and it's very obvious.

When he first appears onstage in his Orin outfit, he keeps inhaling nitrous oxide, and he has an inhaler and keeps using it. When he does, he sucks it in, making a Darth Vader breathing noise, bugs his eyes out, and cackles hysterically for a second. He just won't stop doing it, and it's so funny.

At the end of "Dentist!" when Orin says, "Say ah," the urchins all put in those freaking cheek retractors (aka the ones that the Falsettos family wore at Susan Blackwell's Thanksgiving dinner), and did their "ah"s with them in. And then right at the end, they distract the audience enough for Christian to put one in, and he yells "Now SPIT" with that in his mouth. It was absolutely hysterical.

He and Jeremy Jordan have some homoerotic tension going on throughout the show—Seymour almost kisses Orin when he comes into the flower shop for the first time, and the customer Christian was playing earlier in the show was obviously gay and was eyeing Seymour up and down, which... Seymour was noticing and preening. They certainly didn't have to play it this way, but it was absolutely brilliant and fueled my fanfic-loving brain.

On Orin's first visit to the flower shop, after Audrey is cowering away from him, he turns on Seymour and holds his fist up, as if he's going to hit him, and Seymour just SCREAMS, which is hilarious, but THEN— Christian and Jeremy spend a couple minutes just messing around. Christian would lower his arm and Jeremy's scream would subside, but then he'd raise it again and the scream would get louder again. It was basically just dragged out for laughs and it was great.

On a more serious note, none of the abuse is played for laughs. There's absolutely nothing funny about how Orin and Audrey interact. Christian's voice just turns absolutely deadly and ice-cold when he's talking to her and it's so effective and not funny in the slightest. He pretty much whispers, "Excuse me, what?" and "Sorry, what?" when she has interrupted him, and it's actually terrifying. And there's basically a "Marvin Hits Trina" moment where Orin slaps Audrey in the face when she forgets her sweater, and it looks absolutely awful, which was the intention.

As the old man hunched over and pushing a cart, he tries to break into the flower shop when it's closed and gets run off, and it's just something that happens in the background, but it's a great detail.

When Seymour comes into the dentist's office and pulls out the gun, Orin walks forward and straight into the gun (Christian just plays his gait with this swagger that I can't describe, but it's great). The gun essentially folds his nose in half, pressing it sideways, and he just eyes the audience and says his next line (a very sickly sweet: "Are you nervous about seeing a dentist?"). I love that he made fun of his own nose.

Christian seems to have way too much fun brandishing that rusty drill.

When he's got the gas mask on (first of all, that mask is WILD and magnifies and distorts his face ghoulishly), and he's dying, he lies on the floor and gurgles for so long, again just dragging that out for laughs. He JUST KEPT GURGLING. Right when you'd think he was done and had died, he'd do a little spasm and another round of over-exaggerated gurgling would start.

He was crawling all over the floor during that song, leaning into the audience and yell-singing at them through the mask, and I really wish I could have afforded front row tickets! (Also, side note, Jeremy Jordan spits so much when he's singing that I'm pretty positive the front row got sprayed a couple times.)

When he's in drag playing Mrs. Luce during act two, he looks so much like Herbert from Spamalot with a blondish wig on. It was such a callback to that role, especially since he was doing a high-pitched voice and slightly British accent. Oh, and a strange thing I noticed—his legs are so pale! Like it looks like he's never gotten sun on his legs his entire life. They're an almost creepy white color.

Another note about Mrs. Luce—that man can run in fucking stiletto heels! I'm absolutely in awe. He does his bit as Mrs. Luce, then literally bolts off-stage for his quick change into Skip Snip. And he's wearing heels the entire time. Incredible.

Each character he plays in that song (Bernstein, Mrs. Luce, and Skip Snip), all lift up Seymour's glasses to see his face, and do their own variation of a horrified "Ew, no!"

Mrs. Luce throws up a handful of money when she leaves, a lot of which lands in the audience, and the urchins, who are gathering it up, snap their fingers at the audience to pick it up for them and snatch it out of their hands, brandishing their fingers at them for taking it from them. So funny!

At the end of the show, all the characters who were eaten by the plant (so... all of them except the urchins) emerged wearing ghillie suits with a flower around their faces and flowers for hands (which looked kinda like the Stranger Things monsters). They wore these for curtain call, and Christian kinda looked surprised when they brought the lights back up for curtain call. I saw him say "Perfect!" to Tammy Blanchard, who was standing next to him.

For curtain call, they brought out the entire backstage crew for the audience to applaud, then wheeled out a little table with a 12-inch TV on it, exactly what Audrey dreamed of, that had a live video of the conductor (under the stage) to applaud him as well. Then, after the actors and crew left, they left the table onstage, and after the final note was played, the conductor held up a little sign that said “The End,” and the video feed ended. It was so cute. So if any of y'all have the chance to see this show, don't rush out of the theatre after the actors have left the stage! There's this little gem in there at the end.

So— I'm pretty sure that's everything! (I took notes at intermission so I wouldn't forget some of the smaller details.) The cast was brilliant, and I had such an incredible time. I'm so thankful I got to see it.