#.... my alignment is a mess

[yourplayersaidwhat]

Cleric: “I think you’ll like this idea.”

Me (DM): “…I’m already concerned but okay.”

Cleric: “So you used to work it wildlife rehabilitation so you know about diseases and stuff that are asymptomatic in cats but not in humans, and the big bad’s army is mostly human but I’m tabaxi…”

Me (DM): “Okay so you want to take advantage of my love of nature to bend the rules on disease in DnD and commit war crimes by using biological warfare.”

Cleric: “I want to wipe out the enemy army with all the illnesses.”

Me (DM): “Welp you are no longer neutral aligned that’s for sure.”

Cleric: *Proceeds to eat nearly every monster the party kills in hopes of catching diseases.*

Me (DM): *Proceeds to show how spreading disease affects allies and not just enemies.*

[congregation-of-the-spiral]

reblog this w the entity/entities you most align yourself with & why

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

🖤🤍 happy birthday to everything you’ve come to expect 01/04/16 🤍🖤

(aka the album with one of the most impressively homoerotic music video collections of all time)

[crownedwille]

.

[cerise-on-top]

Eating Jausn with König

A Brettljausn is just about the best thing out there. I wrote this back in November when my classmates decided to talk about Easter and Osterjausn, so the formatting is different. However, I thought it would work well with the Easter post, so I decided to post it now.

“Honey, what is that?” You looked at the wrinkly, dark colored thing in front of you. It might have been a sausage, on closer inspection. The plate was well filled with all kinds of meat and cheese. On the side were horseradish, eggs and pepper of all colors. On a small plate in front of you were small, sliced cherry tomatoes, the basket next to it held bread.

“It’s a Brettljause, it’s what we eat on special occasions, such as easter. But you don’t always need one to eat it. Just enjoy the meat, dear. It’s all from regional farmers as well.” König seemed rather content while looking at the food. You knew that Austrians loved their meats and sausages, he had told you about that before and you made fun of him for it, but you didn’t think he’d take it upon himself to prepare something like that. It seemed like that must have taken a lot of work. Must have been fairly costly as well. There was bacon there, it looked fairly good.

You took a piece of bread and picked up some meat with a fork. “And what’s this?”

“That’s Geselchtes. I call it Gsöchts, though. It’s meat that you put in salt water before smoking for a few hours. Before eating, you normally cook it. Don’t worry, this one doesn’t have too much fat on it, you can just cut those pieces off.” He put some gray-ish meat on a slice of bread, adding some egg slices and topping it off with some of the grated horseradish. Its scent wafted through the air, stinging your nose a bit. You watch him take a bite out of the bread, he locks his eyes with yours once he notices. “Is something the matter?”

“No, no, everything’s alright.” You looked at the pink meat on your fork, a bit hesitant to give it a try. König seemed to like this sort of food, he likely wouldn’t have prepared it otherwise. Besides, it was classic Austrian cuisine, apparently, it was only polite of you to try it, at the very least. Taking a bite out of the meat, you ran your tongue across it to give it a taste. You could definitely taste the salt, but it wasn’t too bad. It simply added to the flavor. The meat wasn’t very chewy, but you wouldn’t exactly call it the most tender meat either. It was actually surprisingly good. Instead of putting it on your bread, you simply ate the piece whole before picking up the same thing König had. “And what’s this?”

“Schweinsbratn.” He didn’t even hesitate to gobble up his bread, already on his second one. This time he put some bacon on it with cheese. Eggs and horseradish weren’t missing this time either. One of the tomato slices was lifted off the plate and put on his instead.

You followed his example and put two slices of the meat on your bread, topping it off the same way as him. That meat wasn’t too bad actually either, it was obvious that it was made of pork. With the horseradish being very fresh it was only natural for it to be spicy still. It didn’t disappoint, the taste somewhat reminding you of wasabi, even if your eyes started watering a bit. Your bread was gone soon enough and you opted for another one. There was no telling if König’s next one was his third or fourth one already.

“So, Schatzi.” He prepared another one. “Is it good? Do you like it?”

“Oh, it actually is. It’s pretty good.” Taking some of the red pepper, you put it on your bread with Geselchtem, gulping down a few of the tomatoes. You were sort of surprised this stuff didn’t come with a salad as well.

By the time you were on your third bread, the plate was already pretty empty, with König having eaten quite a lot. He’s always had a rather big appetite, and for that you were grateful, there was no way you could have eaten all of that on your own. You hadn’t tried the dark, cut up sausage yet. Of course, you had no idea what that was either. “What’s this? Sausage?”

König quickly chewed the food in his mouth before swallowing it down. “Yes, that’s Hoatwiastl. Hartwürstel, I suppose. As the name suggests, it’s a hard sausage. It’s very good, though, you have to try it.”

It was rather hard indeed, you were glad it was cut up into smaller slices. Biting into it whole would be another other ordeal. It was too small to put on bread, so you ate it along with it. Once done, you were completely full, incapable of eating another bite. There were still pieces of meat and cheese left on the plate, it was unbelievable. König didn’t seem affected at all, he simply got up and started putting everything away before returning with a bottle. If you had to take an educated guess then there’s a chance “Wein” might have been the German word for “wine”. “Would you like a  Spritzer? It’s essentially wine mixed with soda.”

“Is that really necessary? Do we really need to drink too?”

He chuckled a bit. “It’s a big part of our culture. Alternatively, I can offer you some Gösser or Puntigamer.” With an amused expression, he watched you weigh your options. You didn’t know what either of those things were, probably some sort of beer, thus making you better off with the wine, probably. König even got the two of you some wine glasses. They were fancy looking, but you weren’t sure if you could actually take a sip of that.

He really just put mineral water into some wine, drinking it slowly. With a watchful eye, he almost expected you to take after him, which you did eventually. It tasted exactly the way you’d imagine, sparkly wine with a bit less flavor. Not the worst you’ve ever had. The things you did to make your man happy.

You continued to eat for another few minutes, this time in silence, for the most part. The plate was certainly full at the beginning, you couldn’t believe your eyes when most of it was gone. Still, despite the culture being rather meat heavy, you had to admit, it was pretty good. However, it was very filling. You couldn’t eat another slice of bread, opting for the meat and sausage instead, eating some slices of cheese along with them. Maybe some mayonnaise would have been good with it as well, but you didn’t want to make the suggestion in case König didn’t like it.

After wiping his mouth with a paper towel, he sat back, letting out a content sigh while holding his tummy. Even he seemed to be rather full after the copious amounts of meat he had eaten. Not like you weren’t, however. He took another sip of his Spritzer before putting the plates away, with you helping him out a bit, naturally.

“Thank you for trying some of my food, I do appreciate it. Did you like it?” Cleaning the plates with a sponge, his focus was on getting the last few crumbs off it so he could put it in the dishwasher. You popped one last cherry tomato in your mouth before handing him another plate, giving him a hum of approval.

“Yeah, it was pretty good, but could we maybe eat something less meaty next time? This was quite a lot.”

“Don’t worry, Schatzi, next time we can eat Kasnudeln. They’re also very delicious!”

[liquidstar]

a friend who'd wait :)

[fearmeeeee]

TUMBLR ATE THE ASK WHEN I SAVED IT AS A DRAFT SO IM SORRY IT WONT NOTIFY Sorry for taking so long to reply! If there is ONE thing I need to stay with you from this, it's study your own body. Its the fastest, most accurate, most easily available way to study anatomy. Crouch, touch your shoulders, hug your legs, raise your arms above your head and try to notice the differences in size between limbs. Put your hand on your face. Look at your reflection in a mirror/window. Especially since we are talking about proportions, those are about the same in all bodytypes and need just minor tweaking to get the feel of a different build. And if you dont draw your bodytype, who will? Disclaimer: I'm very honoured you asked me for tips, but I usually dont think abt proportions, since I internalize the things I learn by observing, so its a bit hard to put into diagrams. I will do my best!

Since the ask is pretty general, I just tried to give the first advice that comes to mind.

When drawing the body standing up, the top of the hip is the middle of the entire height. Also when standing, the elbows would align with the waist and the wists with the crotch.

Try touching your shoulder with the hand of the same side. The forearm is shorter than the upper arm, but combined with the hand it exceeds the length. Same for legs (thighs are the longest part) when the foot is pointed down. When you measure from the base of the foot though, the knee is around the middle. When the arm is held above the head, it can bend at the elbow around 90 degrees and then it will touch the top of the head with the forearm. A hand will take up the face of a person, from chin to eyebrow tips, but hand sizes can be pretty varied.

The bodies can have different muscle and fat masses and be exagerated, but the ratios above will still be about the same.

Also when drawing sitting down and hollding the legs , I've found its easy to kinda align the collarbone with the top of the knees (this works because the spine is bent so the torso has less length than when standing). The tips of the limbs (hands and feet) can be exagerated a bit bigger if you are unsure (or just want to) and they still look correct, whereass being drawn smaller makes them feel off.

Personally I draw hands MUCH bigger than I should because I like the way it looks, it is very much not the right proportion. I also tend to stretch the bodies much more, but it is very important you understand how bodies work and what the proportions are before you start stretching and exagerating the limbs. This is already my interpretation so studying real life is better still. I hope this makes sense, I'm bad at explaining Thank you for the ask, and have fun creating💚

[fisheito]

i said i wasnt going to read Two Fixed Points because i dont like scifi but then they published a post-fic yakueimond threesome and i went "well obviously i cant read that without knowing the background lore" so here i am today

[t3chborb]

I don't consider Ramattra difficult to draw, just very time consuming due to all the details.

... Excluding his ELBOWS, of all things.

Try extending your own arm and twisting your wrist and then entire arm. How in God's name do those kinds of motions (or in my case, poses) translate to a robot arm without a ball joint at the elbow???? I swear whenever I pose my arms to get a better idea on where the elbow itself points, which side of the hand has the the thumb, etc etc, then translate the information onto him, 99% of the time he ends up with dislocated elbows...

[screambirdscreaming]

At the bus stop one time there was a gaggle of preschoolers waiting to catch the bus for a field trip day, and someone walked past with a couple of friendly little dogs, to great general delight.

But after a little bit, the dogs were getting overwhelmed, and the preschoolers were gently coaxed to back off so the person with the dogs could continue on. Specifically, one of the preschool teachers said, "Sometimes, when you're small, being surrounded by big people can be a bit scary and overwhelming. Even if they are friendly."

This was recieved as great wisdom: after all, the preschoolers were also small, and understood how scary and overwhelming big people could be! And the dogs were indeed even smaller than the preschoolers, so it made sense.

What was funny and charming was that, upon absorbing and reflecting on this wisdom, they all felt the need to tell it to one another. In tones of great insight, they turned to one another and said, "Did you know? Sometimes when you are small, being surrounded by big people can be scary and overwhelming! Even if they are friendly!" Back and forth, without any particular concern that they were all saying the same thing. Have reached comprehension of an insight, it must be shared!

I must say that this behavior is less charming in tumblr users than in preschoolers. Not least because tumblr users, having gained a little analytical skill to misuse, insist on Summarizing and Generalizing and Unifying the insights they repeat, quickly turning any interesting new information into formulaic dogmatic mush.

[toastshark]

@praise-suns-and-chill I do hope this is adequate! As much as I like angsty stuff, drawing it is not my forte ^^

Drawing brought to you by a time when confusion hit on Fafnir while boosted and he proceeded to decimate the entire team

[yourplayersaidwhat]

Lawful Good Cleric with low INT: "I'm not evil"

DM: "BUT YOU'RE STUPID!"

[arsenicflame]

sam bellamy i miss u

[crimsonkenjii-writes]

Wild that I thought I wouldn’t make it past 14 and here I am turning 22 soon

What the fffuuucccckkkkk

[wanderingfandoms]

For Word of Honor’s 2nd Anniversary

Special thanks to the shl archive carrd

[marklikely]

thinking abt how tim was like hey you've ruined my life and i don't want to be involved in your privacy-invading monster hunting show and jay was like ok fine. *broadcasts tims entire medical history to the internet*