Lighting/background practice but it turned into my old middle school otp WOOOO
I picked up a johndave fic, blacked out for a week, and when I came back I found myself feverishly drawing a lot of johndave. art block is no more but im squarely in homestuck johndave brainrot rn 👍 strap urselves in for more pepsicola WEEEE (just bear with me I’ll be drawing ninjago in time for season 2 of DR)
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You Never Cared (Enough)
This.
This is the moment, I think, where Porsche finally admits to himself he wants Kinn.
Because Porsche isn’t really arguing against Kinn’s point here.
Kinn does care about his people - we’ll see very clear examples of that later in the series (when he’s grieving for Big and Erica, when he saves Pol and Pete during the shootout, etc.), and Porsche has concrete proof that Kinn cares just as much about him -
But Porsche doesn’t want Kinn to see him as an employee - a responsibility. He doesn’t even want to be seen as a friend.
He wants Kinn to admit that being with Porsche meant something… different. That he didn’t just use Porsche, to get it out of his system, when he was an easy target.
Because it was different for Porsche.
As far as we know, the end of episode 4 was the first time Porsche had sex with a man, the first time he’d had sex after being drugged, and… the first time he’d had sex with someone he really liked. Someone he’d been starting to get to know, who irritated and intrigued him all at once, instead of just a one-time fling.
And he barely got any time to process all of that - his sexuality, his autonomy, his feelings - before Kinn shut down, put more distance between them than ever before, and became cruel -
So it’s only now, after getting time away to get back to who he was - in his own house, spending time with his brother and friends - that Porsche has finally worked out just why he’s so hurt by Kinn.
That, despite everything, he doesn't want to be just one of Kinn's people.
He wants Kinn to care more about him.
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on the other hand you've got people like my aunt jeni who claims that she has no memories from before the age of eight which i just don't think is true but even so there are definitely some people who have worse memories.
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