#70nn13

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I've been so ashamed of the fact that I'm me

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That's my fault

The fact that I don't deserve love is my fault The fact that I've always been alone is my fault

and I want to punish myself for it

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After so much time alone, after so many people have left, I'm starting to feel less human

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I hate myself to such a level that I become a danger to myself

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It seems wrong for me to love myself

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One way or another I always think of a way to destroy myself

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everything becomes a trigger for me

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The feeling when you realize that you don't deserve love from others, that you are so dirty, imperfect, difficult to deal with and crazy that no one wants you for anything other than to fuck your holes is devastating.

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I just bought 15 xanax pills

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I've asked God for so much forgiveness for being the way I am

but I don't think he accepted my apology

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girlblogging at the gym