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thedeluluverse · 1 year

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Summary: While you have been working for BTS for a little over a year, you and your boyfriend Taehyung have only officially been together for two and a half months. Everything is going well until he starts tagging along to your shoots with your other clients, Stray Kids. Are his suspicions correct or is he seeing things?

Pairing: idol!Taehyung x multi-group-photographerGF!Nari a.k.a. “Burning Film” couple

Rating: PG13

Genre: idol!au, mutual pining, angst, fluff, early relationship, jealousy, coworker!au, work crushes

Word Count: 1, 965

Warnings: angst, fluff, feeling insecure, slight teasing, jealousy,

Author's Note: Here is the "Burning Film" couple again! I have created an oc basically for this storyline of Tae named Nari who represents y/n! It isn't necessary to read BF first but it would help you understand what they've bee through already plus I am proud of it so if you do, let me know what you think! Also, we stan SKZ and Felix in this house so no hate, this was just an idea I've had for awhile. Enjoy!! :)

P.S.- yes I am going to go back into Burning Film and replace y/n with Nari but another time. I have work in like 6 hours so going to catch some sleep hopefully XD

The last three months have been much deserved bliss with your new boyfriend Taehyung; not only do you finally have the man of your dreams, but your work has garnered a plethora of attention earning you the title of official photographer for the kpop group Stray Kids as well! Tae is supportive of your dream but is having a hard time adjusting to you being away from him more than usual. Noticing his demeanor change every time you say you’re going to “other work”, you make a decision as you are getting ready one day.

Nari: “BAAABBEEE!!” – you shout from the bathroom as you put the finishing touches on your outfit.

Tae: rushes to you out of breath “Yes jagiya? Is everything alright?”

Nari: giggles and turns towards him “Yes silly, I didn’t scream fire or anything. Still cute though.”

Tae: kisses the top of your head “Fair enough but I just had to make sure, and you’re the cute one baby. Anyway, why did you summon me?”

Nari: blushes slightly Wellllll, I was going to see if you wanted to accompany me to the Stray Kids photoshoot today. I know it’s been rough having less free time together lately. If not I totally get if it’d be boring for you so no pres-“

Tae: interrupts you by picking you up and spinning you around “Oh I’d love to y/n that’s such a great idea!!! I’ve always wished I could see the magic behind the camera so this is perfect! I’ll meet you by the car in 5 minutes, you’re the best!”

You can’t help but chuckle at how puppy-like he could be, but it was endearing that he wanted to understand what you did for a living. In true gentleman fashion, he opens your door when you get to the SKZ location, carries your equipment inside for you, and even brings you a water and an easy snack for while you work. Halfway through the shoot, you tell the guys to take a 10-minute break so you can assess what else you need and so they can grab a snack as well.

Tae has been waiting nearby during the shoot in case you need anything, so he takes this opportunity to use the restroom and refill his water. As he returns he sees you talking with Han, Bang Chan, and Felix, which was fine until he heard Felix exclaim, “Woah Gracie, I love you for that!”. He doesn’t say anything, but he is not thrilled about the fact that he of all people has a special nickname for you. Before today he had no issues with the guy, so what changed? You and Nari will find out soon enough don’t worry!

The shoot comes to an end about a half hour later and Tae can’t help you pack up and get out of there fast enough. I mean, you can’t really blame him since y’all have been there for close to 5 hours but it’s not like he hasn’t had longer shoots. Guess time is more of a drag when you aren’t an active participant. In any case, after picking up a quick bite y’all are home bound! As soon as he puts the car in park you can tell something is different. He uncharacteristically grabs his meal and goes inside before you can even open your door. Chalking it up to him being hangry and missing Yeontan, you give a tired exhale and head inside.

As you kick off your shoes and scan the house, you don’t see Tae anywhere; you peak into the living room and his room because he likes to eat in there sometimes but still no luck. Assuming he must have something to work on after hearing him in his studio, you resign yourself to eating at the kitchen island alone with Yeontan peacefully asleep at your feet.

After eating, you shuffle to his studio door looking for some company, but your knocks are met with silence then a “C’mon Nari, can’t you tell I am busy right now? I’ll be out when I’m done, go watch TV or something aish!”. Tears pricking behind your eyes, you give a quiet “oh, okay sorry I won’t bother you anymore love…” before you walk away and curl up on the couch listening to calming lo-fi music as you try to quiet your brain. You didn’t do anything to make him upset as far as you can recall so unless something gets brought to your attention, you decide to enjoy the rest of your afternoon doodling in your notebook.

The sun has long set, and you can’t remember when you passed out on the couch exactly before you got awoken abruptly by the loud opening of Tae’s studio door and him stomping to take Yeontan on a walk. You are less in a daze when he comes back and are just looking up pleadingly at him only for him to bark out a “what?!” and in return you croak out an unconvincing “nothing” just for him to scoff at you. “Yeah sure, you’ve looked pitiful since we fucking got home. What’s the problem huh? Miss your strays?”.

You blink wide-eyed “what the hell are you talking about? You’re the one who has been in a shitty mood since a random point in the shoot. You wanna tell me what’s going on?” He sits in the big armchair near you, running his hands through his hair then gets up and paces for a good 3 minutes before sitting back down with his elbows on his knees and hands clasped; deeply sighing, he finally reveals the truth.

You sniffle, heart pounding in anticipation trying to look strong even though you were terrified you had blinked wrong or something and were about to be single. He takes a long sip of water then glares up at you, “So you wanna know what’s going on huh? Well, I don’t ‘knaur’ Gracie, what is going on?” Confusion shadows your features as you meet his eyes, “Why did you ask like that and why on earth did you call me Gracie???” He darkly chuckles and says, “Oh, is that an issue?” Nari rolls her eyes and says “Why are you laughing first of all? And it isn’t an issue per say, it just shocked me because you have never called me that once since we’ve met.”

Tae leans back in his chair manspreading trying to affirm his authority and explains, “Well, here goes and don’t you fucking interrupt me. If you somehow have questions, be a patient little cheater and wait until I’m done okay?” You nod in anticipation trying to stay strong and not react to his accusation yet. “Well, whatever name you’re going by, you are right. I haven’t been in the best mood, and it wasn’t a ‘random point’, it was when you had called for a 10-minute break. I had returned from the bathroom and saw you had relocated from our spot to near the Aussies and Han.”

You raise your hand giving him the grandest power complex to which he only tilts his head towards you beckoning you to speak. “You know I’m friends with all of them so why did seeing that turn you into a dick?”. Poking his cheek with his tongue, he clarified, “It didn’t turn me into a dick darling. I just don’t like people trying to take what is mine.” “Nobody was trying to take me you dumbass.” “Then why the shit does Felix have a special nickname for you AND said he loves you??” he slightly yelled with tears in his eyes.

As he hid his face in his hands, taking deep breaths to avoid sobbing, you were trying to process the words that just came out of his mouth. After stuttering and trying to form sentences, you explain the situation as he comes to sit next to you. Turning towards him and covering his hands with yours, you take a deep breath and bring him up to speed; “So the name thing first. Well as you know he and Bang Chan are Australian. So, them trying to say my first name just winds up in a 10-minute loop of aggressive ‘nauring’ you know? So, I decided to tell them my middle name and Bang Chan immediately fell in love with calling me ‘Gracie’ so only the Aussies call me that, for that reason only okay?” He cracks a small smile, “I guess that does make sense….. but why did he say he loved you?” You choke on air, and you ask incredulously, “Ummm when the hell did he say that?!?!”

He glances at the floor sheepish worried he misheard something now and is starting to feel like the biggest asshole to ever exist. “I dunno, I just heard him tell you ‘Woah Gracie, I love you for that!’ and just after the unexplained name thing it sent me spiraling.” You give a small smile this time and go “calm down tiger, I had just shown him a photo I had edited of him and hella fixed the lighting, so he was grateful because it was an important photo of him. That’s it I promise okay? I swear on Tannie!!”

It was his turn to go big eyed because he knew when you swore on a pet, you meant business! “Okay I believe you Nari I really do.” You breath the deepest sigh of relief ever until he interrupts with “But I do have one more question…” “Oh?” you question, “what’s up Tae?”. “Okay now don’t get mad, but are you sure there’s nothing there? I mean it seemed like there was some flirting, at least from where I stood.” “I mean I doubt he was flirting with me; he knows I am with you plus I double doubt you started a trend of fine Korean men finding me attractive.” you chuckle.

Suddenly his countenance darkened again in an instant as he backed away, “fine Korean men????” you gulp, “I mean, I didn’t mean fine fine, I just meant that I am a photographer, so I appreciate aesthetically pleasing things and people.” You say as you start to get off the couch, but he stands and pulls your hair getting you to look him in the eyes “So you aren’t attracted to him AT ALL then??” Tears form once again in your eyes as you explain yourself, yet again…”Okay so he maybe was my first SKZ bias, and you aren’t the first person to point out that he flirts with me a lot. I won’t deny that before we were together it was very nice, but I love you not him okay?”

There’s a long pause until you both sit back down, and he looks like he has seen a ghost, “wait…love me???” You chuckle, “Yes you idiot, lovingly of course!” He has tears in his eyes then asks, “Are you sure??? I mean, it has only been a few months and I know I’m taller, but my voice can’t get near his and I was an ass earlier…” “Hun, I agree you could’ve handled everything earlier better and come to me sooner and been upfront. But it doesn’t mean that you are inherently an ass okay? I don’t care that your voice isn’t just like his, I love your voice and it’s been my peace for years now.”

“Well, good points all around and I just…. I really am sorry that I freaked out so much earlier, I just love you too, so it lit a fire in my soul. I’m sincerely sorry and I’ll do better okay? I can’t lose you…”. You are both sobbing at this point and then while you pull each other into the most intense embrace, you reassure him

“You won’t”.

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jannelle-o · 2 years

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April Travel Paintings aka Borahaegas~~ ✨💜🧡 w/ my sister and her husband woohooo~!! 🥰💙💖 We went to the Day 3 concert and other activities related to BTS~ It felt like a BTS festival and I was a little overwhelmed by everything because I only knew a few general things about them at the time, and it was one of the best experiences I've had in 2022. Probably the best live concert experience I've had in my life currently too~ 🕺✨🎶 This took me way longer to finish than I expected (wasn't expecting months to finish this oops) , but then again this is pretty detailed haha I'm amazed I finished the paintings before 2022 ended for me XD I had so much fun working on these ~ 🥺💙 Also this isn't a watercolor sketchbook, I just wanna put all my travel related drawings in one sketchbook... so that could be why it took longer too? XD;

I hope you enjoy looking through all this~ uwu 💕

( I'll put some details of the trip and of the paintings/drawings in a read more so this isn't hopefully too long for everyone haha 😅)

The first three pages were done during the trip, while the rest were done throughout a couple of months? Some road trip landscapes and bt21 and attempts to paint while in a car heading back home haha I had an accident with over-flooding my pink posca and that was before the concert lol oops sorry Cooky ( also the gray, but that wasn't as bad as the pink ) thankfully none of it got on anyone, but I did have to clean up the bed weh ;o; It was super windy heading back on Saturday ( my sister and her husband had to head back to help out with wedding stuff for friends ) and it was too hard to paint in a shaking car. I thought we were gonna fly off the road and tumble into the desert haha.

For the 3 1/2 page , I wanted to paint one more road trip landscape and also the Seven Magic Mountains. I only painted one of seven in my last Vegas related trip paintings so I wanted to try painting all of them this time. I haven't actually gotten up close to them yet only seen them while on the road, maybe the next trip to Vegas? haha

The rest of the paintings are a summary of the trip heheh~

Café in the City was very tasty, finally had tteokbokki after craving it for a while, mmm jajangmyeon, and I inhaled that bungeoppang even though I was pretty full :d The drinks were also very good~

The Pop-Up exhibit had lots of photo taking opportunities, I really enjoyed seeing all the music video inspired built sets 🤩 The food and drinks we got after the pop-up were really nice. I decided to put a space background for the My Universe Brownie 🌌

Behind the Stage exhibit was super wonderful, all the behind the scene photos of their practicing to rehearsals to concerts was really cool. Also I accidentally touched one of the photos and I was scared we would get kicked out haha :'0 I also liked the stage playing music videos afterwards and liked the design of the vodka can we got while resting so I painted that too 😆

Bacchanal Buffet was tasty too, though I think I got full much faster than expected and didn't get to try as much food Then we went to the Bellagio Fountains to see if they'll play a BTS song... but they didn't when we went there lol 😂 Then the day of the concert we went to a mall for a pop-up shop and you could write notes to BTS and put them on a wall, it was very cute 💜

Concert time wooo~!! 🎶🧡✨💜 My sister is the one with the Cooky headband, I'm the one in the bucket hat haha. The energy of BTS and ARMY in the concert was super infectious, I had so much fun and that energy was still pulsing in me for a couple of days 🤩 I tried to fit a visual for every song they performed, some were a little easier than others haha If I missed any song, I'm sorry I didn't mean to ;o; I wished I practiced all the fanchants :'D I also wished I had added some other things that happened in the concert, but I wanted to keep it contained in one spread c':

Just ahh... what a super wonderful time overall. ✨🥰 Thanks a bunch to my sister and her husband for inviting me to come along, you're both the best and I love you lots and seeing my sister's happiness about all this was irresistible and made me happy too. Also ARMYs were super kind and nice and gave cute freebies and it was sweet haha ;w; Much love to BTS for bringing so much joy and brightness to my sister and to many others. I already thought positively about them for helping her when she needed it last year, and I'm now so endeared with them and deep dove into their discography and videos and things and they have brought a lot of positivity this year for me haha 🥺💜

#BTS #bts fanart #Fanart #Jann art #random doodle #doodles #er some of these are doodles? haha #bt21 #watercolor #there's also posca and pen/ink and white gouache too haha but mainly watercolor #travel related paintings #also #food #long post

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magicalyaku · 2 years

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Turns out working 11-12 hours a day for two weeks straight effectively wiped all witty thoughts from my head (if I ever had some), but I’ll do my best to remember my November books. /3

15 Tage sind für immer (Here the whole time) (Vitor Martins): This one was unexpectedly nice. It basically made me smile nonstop throughout which was a good thing as I was reading it mostly at my artist alley table at Comic Con Stuttgart and you like to buy stuff from smiling people, right? 8D Felipe's mom is kinda the best. Also the German translation by Svantje Volkens was really good to read. Darius the Great is not okay (Adib Khorram): As the eternal advocate for friendship stories this one took me by surprise! I'm so not used to getting actual ones whithout romance. xD It was appreciated though. I also finally got the pop culture references! Usually I never notice or understand them because I never read or watch what's popular right now but just like Darius I grew up on Star Trek (especially The Next Generation). That was so nice~ But! I'm not sure if I would have enjoyed all the references that much if I didn't know the series. Because they were everywhere. Like take them out and there would be no book left. It was nice to learn about Iran and read about family and connections and stuff. There was also a lot of tea. I like tea. Darius the Great deserves better (Adib Khorram): I don't remember this very well. I didn't like it as much as its prequel but I'm pretty sure that was because of the suffering. Darius is having a hard time thoughout the book and that gave me a hard time, too. Not frustrating though at least. It handled that pretty well. More like a good message you have to work for? Bone Weaver (Aden Polydoros): This should be a fantasy book right up my alley. I realised, however, I'm so much more critical of female protagonists. "8D Toma did well though. Most of the time. I wish she wouldn't have fallen for Vanya (my heroines do not need any love stories thank you) but I have to give her credit for not falling for the first male person she meets (Mikhail), only for the second! And in all honesty, even though I might whine that it would have been better with Vanya x Mikhail, it would not. Because Mikhail lost Alexei (with or at least for whom he had a thing) within the first five pages of the book and having him move on within in three days ... errr The No. Well. I did enjoy the setting, the lore. And gawd I wasn't aware how much I love nicknames? Not "babe" or "sweetheart" etc but real names. Russian names provide so well in that department. Vanya was like "Hey, I'm Ivan but everyone calls me Vanya!" And everyone does! And then, 5 seconds later Mikhail goes "Ivan!" and I'm squealing because you know that at some point in the near future he will reluctantly come to like Vanya and will switch to the nickname as well and it will glorius. orz Anyway. I enjoyed the book but two things: The suffering. The physical pain. I read Mr. Polydoros' other books as well (The City Beautiful and the Assasin Fall duo) and in both the protagonists spend a lot of time in pain. Bone Weaver is no exception. It may not be "a long time" in here, but these guys are pretty broken up it's not funny. Second thing: I wish it would have been third-person instead of Toma's perspective only. I would have loved to learn more about Mikhail. What was his relationship with Koschei before? Will he be okay even when his people find out he has no more magic? The conversations, the bonding between him and Vanya. Gimme more! D: All for the Game series (Nora Sakavic): And finally this. This. I had a lot of words once but I'm reigning myself in. It was good. It was a lot of fun. I read The Foxhole Court back in September and then The Raven King in November and after I finished TRK, I went back to reread TFC ... I didn't want it to be over so soon. /D (And also my memory is shit and I read TFC while at airports, on planes and with my friends chatting next to me, so ... my excuses) I'm glad I read it only now instead of last year when I saw it the first time. (I'm a much more tolerant reader now.) But then, everything I like about the books are things I like in general: good characters, dialogues, self-references that make you leaf back or make you go "aaah" while rereading, and rewards after a long struggle. Gawd. For a hot second while reading TRK I got afraid that everything tumblr fandom teased me with might just be fan stuff instead of canon and I already felt the betrayal. 8D Then I remembered I already read the blurb for The King's Men and it was all there. Phew! Not that I read the books for the romance only. But it was so mind-boggling to know where Neil and Andrew end up when in the beginning they can't spend like two peaceful seconds with each other. So the journey was incredibly intruiging and fun. Haah. (Bonus fun: There were AFTG cosplayers at Comic Con. I only saw a flash of orange in front of my table and was like “Huh, it’s just Haikyuu” but I still took another look and there it was “Palmetto State University”! Of course I embarrassed myself in guessing the characters wrong, but it was still nice. 8D) To ease my AFTG hangover I went back to rewatching anime. I found the perfect little sibling: bad parents, abuse, anger issues, (kinda) gay, more queer kids, estranged childhood friends, boys obsessed with stupid sports, protagonist with an attitude problem and a bad mouth. I present: Stars Align! (Yes, that stupid series which ended on the worst cliffhanger and never got its second part!!! D:<) Speaking of anime, now that the worst of the christmas crunch is over and I'm having time again to actually enjoy stuff I should get back to finishing Yuri on Ice ... and ... Chainsaw Man. xD

#yaku reads #november wrap up #darius the great is not okay #darius the great deserves better #all for the game #aftg #bone weaver #here the whole time #books #queer books #queer lit #lgbtq books

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starblue2406 · 2 years

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Stories from mini-hell II

At this moment several memories come to me. I was recently suggested a very interesting, rare AU, which I definitely agree with and occasionally I will give it some content. But it's definitely not the weirdest one I've ever gotten into.

There are three AU's that have come out of this fanfic so far, but the weirdest one was the AU proposed by Paola.

It all happened one Wednesday, I was leaving the art workshop where we both stayed after class and while we were walking down the stairs to leave the school and before running away she said to me: "Hey wey, how about we give them kids?".

I could only answer "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU SAY?!"

She ran away, got into her family's car and I could not inquire more about the matter and I could only comment to Elgu between laughter and absolute confusion.

The next day at the workshop, I saw her again and now I had to finish with those weird incognitas she left me.

She explained to me that she was very excited to give …. Offspring to our dear protagonist couple (God, even after so long it is hard for me to talk about this without dying of laughter because of how rare it is or how uncomfortable I feel, but it is something that should not be lost in just the anecdote).

At first I flatly refused, I have never been a fan of giving children to a ship and even more if it is impossible, either by biology, history, rules of the universe of the work and the internal logic. What she was proposing was totally sending the above points out the window. It definitely threw me off because she wasn't talking about a hypothetical concept but some scenario she was imagining directly in the story.

It was a very weird thing for me personally and I definitely didn't agree with it at all. After a while of her insistence she finally managed to convince me and I agreed, but I gave her the suggestion that this hypothetical weird case was more of an AU than a timeline or something close to the story.

She agreed with no problem, she just wanted to see Arceus and Damos living as a beautiful family with two cute babies... As if Arceus didn't already have enough with the ones he made himself.

In the end I made my contributions too, because I definitely like this kind of stuff in any of its forms, no matter how weird it may seem to me.

But despite this we could never create a base for this idea, what I mean is that we could never create a scenarie where this as a mini story so that this concept could exist and have some logic, but we could never create it because of our vague ideas about this. The most I could come up with is that Arceus was in a project to create two new legendary pokemon (gods), but Damos for a series of mistakes triggered that these future legendary pokemon were not only of Arceus and these being half human-pokemon and not being "finalized" gods had to be bred from scratch and without a concrete duty.

It's nice to see the AU's that fans of your story come up with no matter how weird they are. Actually of the three this one is the weirdest, the others one I half created and the other one I definitely like a lot. Still this kind of thing in the end always paints a smile on my face.

Nevertheless, it still surprises and disturbs me xD .

Remaining records of this event:

Well, let's start here. Since we are very original, we wanted the children's names to be a combination of the parents' names, starting with "Damar", a cute little girl. I wanted it to be "Dagmar" (not to be so obvious), but Paola said no and it stayed that way.

Then he made his adult version... What can I say?... He looks a lot like Daddy Arceus...

And I'm not too far behind in this matter. I also made my "Contribution"(?), Paola likes the twin or two-child theme, I guess because she is from a family of four siblings and has a twin, so it's to be expected.

So I decided on this design for "Arcamos" (I didn't name him, I swear). The couple's second child, she was delighted to see that he looked more like his human daddy. My god what a fucking cringe that was xD.

Of all the drawings in this AU this is the one I like the most, since that's when I was able to put a little bit of my touch on the whole thing. Giratina would definitely make fun of Arceus for having offspring with a human that he valued the least as a species... That's the best thing I did in all this

I have nothing to say about these other drawings, I can only say that Paola asked me for them and I drew them with laughter of internal suffering.

I'm regretting as you have no idea to write this in this blog,but still I do it so it doesn't get lost in my memory and because to be honest this experience was also something beautiful.The fact of seeing Paola excited and comforting me while I was dying of laughter because of how strange this thing was is very beautiful.

#cringe #fanfiction #fanfic #fanfic aniversary #second aniversary #I do not understand #I still don't understand how I approved and accepted this #Stories from mini-hell #au fanfiction #AU from mini hell #mini hell cultural heritage #AU rare of rare

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tdcloud · 2 years

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How the hell do you write a book? (blog#11)

And we’ve reached November! It’s wild how fast this year has gone by, but even more than that, it’s wild that I’ve managed to keep up a monthly blog for almost an entire year. The last time I tried to do this it didn’t last longer than four months, so really, it’s an accomplishment! I hope you’ve all been enjoying it. I’ll have to plan something special for next month to ring in the occasion. But today is today, and it’s only November. That begs the question: What have I got for you guys this month?

That’s the question I stumble over sometimes, to be honest. It’s easy to talk about things I'm currently working on, but eventually, I do run out of projects to tease. Thankfully, I’ve found that Instagram has been a good source of immediate feedback on this sort of thing (you can find me on there under my general online handle of Terminallydepraved.) It’s a lot of fun to show off my daily thoughts and goings-on via the Story feature on there. Sometimes I even post sneak peeks at covers, art, or snippets of my current writing projects. It’s a fun time. Consider checking it out!

Anyway, I threw a few potential options into a poll on Instagram for this month’s blog topic, and the landslide victory came in the form of a whole blog about my writing process. I’ve definitely spoken to people before about how I write and plan stories, but I’ve never given a step-by-step look of idea creation to finishing a final draft before. I figured that's probably the most interesting way to structure this initial blog—after all, I could easily write a standalone blog post on just about any single step. I’ll be getting into the overview of things and we can save those closer, step-specific posts for the future.

So, no time like the present! Let’s get to it!

For the sake of simplicity, I’m going to treat this the way I would proceed if I were writing a multi-chaptered book and not something short like a novella, oneshot, or fanfic. While the latter three sometimes involve this level of detail and pre-planning, they most often do not and don’t receive the same level of preparation that I’d give to a 300+ page book project. If anyone is curious about how I handle those, we can talk about it in a future post or I can answer it as a Q & A next month! Just ask!

Step 1: Idea Creation

Now, I’m not going to sit here and tell you how to hunt for ideas. Inspiration comes to me or it doesn’t, and most of the time it’s incredibly hard to predict what will give me an idea and what won’t. Sometimes, just watching a movie or reading a book will spit ten new ideas into my head. Sometimes, I can go months without thinking of anything new. I’ve mentioned before that I’m currently at a place where I need to start creating new ideas for future works, and there’s a reason I’ve been asking for suggestions XD I’m not currently inspired by much, so nothing new is flowing.

I’ll give an example, though, of how Brontide came to me. I was reading a book on superstitions and folklore while working a boring desk job in college. I read about faerie knots and couldn’t stop thinking about a fae character tying knots in a human lover’s hair. That in turn kept the idea in my head, fermenting away, until I’d come up with a small plot that later became the fanfic version of Brontide.

This is typically one of the easiest and shortest steps in the process. I literally only need an idea to get going on a project. Sometimes, it’s a small character interaction like that. Other times, it’s a setting (the Drow world, a castle, a city of monsters working day jobs a la Fable). The initial concept that sets the stage for the setting, tone, and general aesthetics comes first, and then I think about the characters.

Step 2: Character Creation

This is what ends up taking up a good portion of my story-inception time. As a rule, I almost always build the story plot itself around the characters as I make them. If I think about Brontide again, I imagine the setting and general tone of the story I want to tell. Then, I think about what sort of leading characters/couple would make this the most fun. As I’ve discussed in previous teasers and character profiles, I have very set archetypes that I tend to favor. Everyone’s got them, and it’s what I default to unless the story I plan on telling is very different from one I’d typically tell. For Brontide, I wanted to tell a traditional fae love story but gay. Therefore, I needed a fae who kidnaps a human, and in stories like that, the fae is almost always royalty. That’s how Ruari came into being. As for the human, those traditional stories tend to have it be a maiden or defenseless wanderer, someone who is plucked from their daily life and thrown into a situation where they have little control. Corbet was sculpted from my desire not to fall into cliche. I wanted a thief, an outcast, someone who would stab a stranger and think about robbing them over being charmed into an obvious trap.

I try to take traditional tropes and cliches and turn them on their heads. In some stories, that’s more obvious than others, but a lot of this relies on character dynamic outright, so I try to go into every story by creating the lead pair with that in mind. I like hot/cold types, but I also need a bit of edge to both of them. It’s boring if everything goes smoothly from the start, so I might make one of them hard to please, distrusting, or conniving. Good romantic pairs should complement one another, but there should also be friction and tension that keeps things interesting. That can come internally or externally, but regardless, it needs to be there to some degree, even if the story is gentle and romantic.

I always start my character profiles by answering basic questions. Age, gender, name, appearance. After that, I think about the story I want to tell. I consider what this character wants. A good character always has a goal they’re trying to achieve. It can be big or small, abstract or tangible. In Letifer, these goals are pretty easily spotted in some characters. Gabriel wants to become a detective. For Nines, we slowly learn what he wants, what he’s lacking, but before he tells us himself, we can read that he’s unsatisfied with his lot in life from the very moment we occupy his perspective: being a vampire sucks if you’re not top of the food chain.

Next, I dig deeper to understand, for lack of better word, what’s wrong with them. Why can’t they get what they want? What’s getting in their way? That’s when you dig into the backstory. This is where deeper shades of motivation come out. Why does Gabriel want to become a detective? Why is Nines stuck at the bottom of the food chain? From there we create Gabriel’s disillusionment with the police structure at large, about how useless he feels when confronted with the horrors of the world and his inability to do anything about them. With Nines, we slowly learn about what he was supposed to be, and why he is what he currently is, and how badly that’s affected literally every single facet of his unlife.

After that, I begin considering the story itself that they’re occupying. Letifer wasn’t a story specifically about how Gabriel became a detective or how Nines became a vampire. Origin stories are great, but this wasn’t that, so the plot itself had to give us an avenue to convey both of those journeys while also being focused on the greater goal of uncovering something bigger. I knew going in that I wanted to tell a crime/mystery story involving a serial killer. I wanted it to be a sort of spoof on buddy cop dramas but between a human and a vampire. That meant I knew I was telling a murder-mystery story. I came up with the culprit, the standard array of background characters a story like that needs (chief inspector for the vamps, human equivalent for Gabriel’s side of things, coworkers for them both that better serve to create disparity between each of their own experiences, and the suspects and witnesses that will be interviewed over the course of the story), and picked the setting (Detroit, a city I visit every year and have a very fond love of, and fall blending into winter, because that remains to this day the only way I’ve ever experienced Detroit in person.)

Then, I begin the outline.

Step 3: Notes and Outlining

I don’t know how many times I’ve heard aspiring writers tell me they don’t outline. I used to be the same, but writing my first book taught me that’s a terrible idea and a bad habit to get into. I’m not here to tell you how to live your life or make your art, but seriously, a book is so long and full of twists, turns, and tiny details that even the most basic of a roadmap will do you worlds of good in actually seeing your first book turn into an actual, finished product.

The best advice I can give someone who wants to write a book is to outline. I’m not going to insist you do it the way I do it, and if you’re morally opposed to outlines for fear of it “impeding your creativity,” at least make bullet points. As I always say, give yourself a roadmap that allows for detours if you need them, but don’t drive off into the world without knowing the destination at all. You’ll never finish anything if you don’t know where you’re going, and if there are problems in your story, the outline is the first, best, and easiest way to see those issues and fix them before you reach the point of no return.

Like, seriously. I’ve had to rewrite two full books from start to finish, and every time I did, it was solely because my outline wasn’t solid enough before I began writing. It may seem intense, how I plan stories, but this is how I finish them. This is literally the reason I’m able to write one book, let alone nine.

Now, this is probably the part I’ve spoken about most when the question of my story process comes up. If asked, those who have discussed this with me before will probably lead the explanation by telling you about my thesis statement method. To this date, I’ve yet to meet anyone who has ever begun a story outline process the same way, but to me, it’s necessary when it comes to distilling my intentions towards a piece as succinctly and plainly as possible. Apotheosis, the prequel to Letifer and the current patreon serialization, is a great example of this in action.

The purpose of this work is to recount the gradual seduction of Kolton by his sire Elijah Eder, head of the Luminary bloodline amidst political machinations, vampiric subterfuge, and the disintegrating relationship between Kolton and his twin brother Nines as he slowly distances himself from his old life to embrace his new one at his sire’s side. By the end of this book we should see what led to Nines’s self-imposed exile away from Kolton, the true nature of Kolton’s relationship with Elijah, and have a general sense of what life is like as a high-blood vampire. It’s not as easy as one would think, privilege of the blood aside. Even as a human Kolton will encounter power plays he can’t combat, witness the sort of debauchery the so-called elite get up to behind closed doors, and learn the stories surrounding the Fall, a mysterious event only alluded to in whispers. Kolton must adapt if he wishes to prove himself a fitting match for Elijah— and to keep his head above water too, of course.

As you can see, it’s almost a cross between a declaration of intent as well as a mini-teaser/summary. This one was pretty well polished since I had been working on it when a lot of questions about my process came up in a few writer discords, but the gist is always the same across the board. They all begin with “The purpose of this work is…” and end with me telling myself what the end-goal takeaway of the story should be. I’ve written tons of things that start out in my head as one thing and turn into another by the time I’m finished with the story. It’s really easy to lose track of what a story is supposed to be and take it in a different direction, which is fine, but when you’re writing a series you tend to need to keep on track or else the future books you’ve planned for are diverted as well.

From this thesis statement, though, I can, at any moment, read over it while working on just about any chapter and make sure I’m aligning the events with the larger scope of the story. Apotheosis is a prequel, but it’s also the best look into the Luminary bloodline that we get in this book series. As Kolton learns and experiences the elite side of vampiric life, so do we, so am I being descriptive and giving time to the culture? Am I keeping Kolton as in control of things as he can given the circumstances? This story is a corporate, vampiric thriller. It’s rooted in mid-90s culture, business settings, and the sort of cutthroat coldness that accompanies such things. It’s honestly not much of a romance—it’s closer to an arranged political marriage, and that needs to carry through in every interaction we see. I’ve had to rewrite a couple chapters already to realign myself with these views, and it’s the thesis statement I turn to when I feel myself getting lost in the weeds.

After the thesis statement, though, comes an actual summary. And I don’t mean a sales page one. I mean a full out, what happens from the first chapter to the last, and it typically takes up about 2-3 paragraphs. I don’t get into the minutiae of every single interaction or what-have-you, but I discuss plainly who does what when, what the conflict, rising action, and climax is, and ultimately how the story ends. This gives me a basic overview of the story’s progression, and from there, I delve into the steps I have to take to bring it all to life.

People on patreon get access to my outlines once a book or novella is complete, so there are better examples of how I do chapter notes available. For this, I don’t want to potentially spoil anything for someone, so I’ll just give you the first chapter of Infaust since nothing super spoiler-y happens in that.

Chapter One: (Rehan) The story opens to Rehan climbing up a hill towards a small village. The day is bright and bleeding into evening, at odds with the nature of his visit. He sees people walking along the way and they give him a wide berth. Same old same old. He arrives in the small village and sees how frightened people are. There are tons of small effigies erected around to mourn the loss of the children. Rehan thinks about why he is in fact here and he finds the elder of the village. Sits down with her and discuss terms of the job. A few witches have tried/come to take the job but left when they heard what was the cause. Chaos God. Rehan flinches but insists. Lays down his terms. The elder brings up the fact he has no familiar. Rehan presses harder on his terms, and the woman has no other option. She is visibly uncomfortable at the terms. Rehan asks for all the info they have on the God and where he is, and he tells her he can’t do it today, but he will go tomorrow. She puts him up for the night in a small shack on the edge of the village. It’s better than Rehan usually gets. He can’t wait til he gets better once this is all over.

As you can see, if I’m writing a story that swaps POVs, I always start each chapter note by specifying what character I’ll be writing from. After that, I write step-by-step what happens over the course of the chapter. Sometimes, this is a very detailed thing, and other times—usually if I feel I’ve got a good mental visualization of how a story is going to proceed—I keep it rather vague to allow for more organic unraveling. I typically try to include what elements need to be present to progress the plot, that way I don’t leave anything out, and I try to include the character’s emotional state. If you’ve read the first chapter of Infaust, you’ll notice that I left out multiple interactions he has with townspeople before he even reaches the village elder. I don’t bother explaining how a chaos god stole the children. I don’t go into Rehan’s internal monologue about how he processes the death of his familiar every time he’s in a position like this, and I don’t include any world building details beyond basic visuals of where he’s currently at. I know all of these, or I let them happen to me as I write.

I do this throughout the whole story, sometimes being vague, sometimes giving more detail based on how much happens in the scene, how important everything is, or if it’s something that doesn’t need much elaboration (sex scenes, backstory exposition moments, fight scenes—things that generally work better with me improvising or writing in the moment without thinking too hard about specifics). If there are moments when I don’t know how something happens, I make a note of it and I don’t begin writing everything until I’ve answered that question. I then give my notes to my editor and a few trusted friends to look over. I ask them questions, and they ask me questions in turn. If I don’t have an answer (How does this ritual work? How are they going to accomplish xyz when they’ve only got abc?) I keep on the outline until I’ve figured it out.

Like I said above, the outline is where the hard work should actually happen when it comes to figuring out what your story is and how you’re going to tell it. It’s my favorite part of the whole process, and it’s also how I can predict just how long a book will be and how long it’ll take me to write. I know how long it takes me to convey xyz in a scene, and I know how many chapters I can write in a certain amount of days. This isn’t something a lot of people can do. As far as I’ve seen, I’m apparently Stephen King, not G. R. R. Martin—and if you aren’t familiar with that comparison, please, look up their interview. It’s great. But anyway, the root of all of this is that a good outline will save you worlds of hurt down the line. Never rush this step and always do your future self a favor by making it the best it can possibly be before you ever put pen to paper.

Step 4: Writing

This step is pretty self-explanatory. I begin writing the story, typically starting with the first chapter and working my way chronologically through it til I reach the end. Within a chapter, though, I’ll jump around, writing the ending first, tacking out dialogue bits I’ve already got in my head, and just working my way through things until it all connects and I can check the chapter off the list as done. If it’s a story I have pretty well visualized inside my head, I may even skip chapters entirely and work wherever I’m feeling it most, but typically, I try to avoid this on book projects. It can be hard to maintain a steady character arc personality-wise when jumping around.

Also, I write a chapter within a couple days typically if not a single day, and then I move onto the next. I don’t go back to revise it unless I’m publishing a story piecemeal to patreon. Finished is always better than perfect, and if I start revising in the middle of things I’ll never get to the end. Also, I almost always feel crippling self-doubt creep in within the first five to six chapters. That’s normal. You aren’t deep enough into a story to see things come together in the ways your brain imagined. My rule of thumb is I’m not allowed to say I hate a story until I’m 3/4s done with it. By that point, I’m almost always so far into things that the pieces are coming together, and I’m vibing with it, and if not, I’m too far in to jump ship now. I commit to finishing it and throwing it to my editor, knowing we’ll hammer it into shape together.

If you struggle with this sort of thing, seriously, stop rereading shit and just keep going. Revision is your best friend and exists for a reason.

Step 5: Editing/Revising

This is probably my second favorite part of the writing process, and one of the reasons why that is is because when I’m revising, I know the work itself is done. The hard part is over. The beast is dead, and now all that’s left is refining its body into something worth reading.

I suppose I should specify that there is a difference between editing and revising. Editing is when you make major changes, rewrite things, rework them. Revising is going over things with a fine tooth comb to find the small errors, i.e. punctuation, sentence clarity, grammar, etc. I enjoy both stages. It’s actually a lot of fun getting to go through work that’s already completed and refining it into something better, and it’s always less daunting to rewrite a few paragraphs than to write an entire chapter from scratch. Even if I do have to rewrite a full chapter, I almost always know exactly what it has to be when I’m in the editing stage. After all, I know why the old chapter failed. It’s just—easier. There’s a lot less pressure to get things right, and it tends to involve the help of an editor, which relieves the burden even more.

Now, my editor is the fucking bee’s knees. Their name is NIL and they’ve been involved in every single project I’ve put out except for Brontide and Letifer—the first because they were moving when I first wrote that book and I didn’t want to bother them to read it, and if you’ve read my Brontide deep dive, you’ll know that’s a mistake I’ve regretted to this day. The latter, though, was more personal, and they were still involved in a lot of the DVerse development outside of that book. They’re a polyglot, a writer themself, a cat-dad, and one of the best friends I’ve ever had. They love vampires and magic, explore spiritualism and the intangible in ways that will make your toes curl, and they’re never afraid to tell me that I’ve fucked shit up again.

Believe me, as an author, you need to hear that more often than you’d think. Every plot hole I’ve filled in was thanks to spitballing ideas with NIL. Every character voice I’ve refined into something unique has happened because they took me aside and told me I was being derivative. They tell me when I need to rewrite a full book. They tell me when something I’ve spent months on isn’t salvageable. They also console me through the emotional aftermath of that, and they help me do better on the next go. I’m a mess sometimes when I don’t know where to take a story. I’ve yet to have a meltdown where they failed to take me by the hand and guide me back onto the proper path.

I know a lot of young, aspiring writers struggle with their books. I wish telling them to get an editor was an easier prospect than I make it sound. You need one, though, if you want your story to be a well-told one. You need someone who will tell you where things are weak, and more than that, more than a beta reader can give, you need someone who can tell you how to fix it. That’s what an editor does. They aren’t there just to fix your commas or run-ons. They’re there to distill the essence of what the story is supposed to be and help you refine it until that’s what the reader holds in their hands.

Good editors don’t grow on trees. You’ll likely have to pay to find one, or go the mainstream publishing route to have a house assign one or two to you. I prefer to have someone I know personally, who knows me personally, but regardless, you need one. You need one bad.

My typical editing process takes months. If I can write a book in one month, it’ll take three to edit and revise it. I usually read over the story myself several times, mark up chapters where I think ideas or executions are weak, and I address them myself before I hand the document off to NIL—if I haven’t just given them access from day one to help keep me on track as I write the damn thing. If I don’t know how to fix something, I mark it. I hand it to NIL. They read it first just to read it, and then they read it again to mark it up as well. It’s normal for me to wake up with 300 suggested edits on three chapters from them. Most, unfortunately, are commas XD But some are comments about plot holes, inconsistent lore details, confusing sentences they can’t decipher, and places where things I tried simply do not work.

My favorite are the reactions, though. The emojis and links to songs certain sentences remind them of, the insults towards shithead characters, and the shock at twists, the pitying condolences at how badly I’ve treated a witch-boy this time... I find this part of the process fun for so many reasons, and even if NIL hates me by the end of a story for dragging their heart through the dirt again, I can’t stop loving it.

To be honest, I can’t imagine working with anyone else on my projects. NIL knows me and my writing style inside and out, and they never try to change my style to suit their own aesthetics the way other editors I’ve had in the past do. They care about every project I put out and will spend hours on voice calls with me hammering out the issues in my story structures until we’ve figured out how to fix them. I learned early on to involve them in every step of my writing process. It just leads to the best result, and there is a reason why I always thank them in my author’s notes. I wouldn’t have put out these books to this level of quality without their help, their insight, and their support guiding me every step of the way.

I know my blog posts are full of shameless plugs, but I truly and sincerely suggest that you check out NIL and consider them for your own projects. They are dedicated and passionate, and you could not be in better hands. You can find them on their blog at https://naughtingwell.wordpress.com/

Tell them Migi sent you—they’ll bad-mouth me to the grave, and I’m okay with that.

Step 6: Publication

This is probably my least favorite part of the entire process of writing a book, namely because I have to do so much stuff that isn’t in my wheelhouse as a self-publisher. When you go the route I go, you have to be a marketing expert, a graphic designer, a copywriter, and a publicist all at once. Sure, I always have a talented artist to handle my cover for me, but I still have to format the text and title font myself. I have to do the interior myself, format it, edit it, make sure the spacing is proper and that nothing is outside the print boundaries. Marketing is its own brand of hell, one you either have to spend a ton of money, time, or both on to get anywhere with it, and it’s probably my least successful part of this whole process. I have all my social media profiles and in-person events and what not, but it’s hard, and seriously, unless you’re able to throw a lot of money each month to get ad space on different sites, you’re probably not going to see large returns without already having an established fanbase or social network to help fill in the gaps for you. I’m always very upfront when it comes to the pros and cons of each type of publishing. We can talk more about that at a later date if there’s interest, but for now, here’s how I go through publication hell.

1. I get an ISBN on Amazon and set up my sales page.

2. I format my interior via InDesign or OpenOffice and create pdfs for the physical releases. This is usually done before I send out for the cover since I have to have a total page count to give the artist an accurate spine template to work from, but I’ll sometimes do my major edits and then send the template and take care of spot edits while they art is drawn—I just can’t lengthen or shorten the book by a single page at this point.

3. Once I’ve got the cover, I submit it and the interior to get my proof copy to see if everything’s printed properly. It usually takes 2-3 times to get everything perfect, and I have to pay for each proof copy every time, sometimes even duplicates to have one shipped to my artist because accurate colors don’t show up well via camera pics.

4. Once the physical release is squared away and submitted, I send my interior file to an ebook maker because the best minds I have access to have yet to figure out how to make one that doesn’t muck the formatting up. I’m convinced it’s impossible, and I’d rather spend money than stress myself out more than I already get with late-stage pub hell.

5. Once all of the book materials are finished and submitted, I open up my own hosted pre-orders for physical copies since Amazon is a cuck and won’t let you have that anymore. Kindle pre-orders are up from the moment you set it up (less chance for loss of return on Amazon’s side of things if it’s canceled when it’s a digital release and not a printed one).

6. Throughout this process I’ve been marketing everywhere I possibly can. I make graphics, I show off excerpts, I lean on all my popular friends to boost my posts and promote it to their own audiences. I pay for ad space and I offer pre-order deals. I invest in merch to help sweeten the deal, and if I’m at cons, I talk about the new release nonstop in hopes these people might check it out when it drops.

7. The book launches, I order my pre-order stock, and I rest in between signing/mailing those out and handling any issues that arise after the fact (these don’t tend to happen anymore, but when I first started out we had lots of issues).

That may not sound that bad given it’s a nice 7-step process when it’s laid out like this, but throughout publication hell, I’m putting in hours upon hours to get things perfect and promote things well enough to make a launch a launch and not a flop. I rely on a lot of my friends, which include graphic designers, editors, artists, typesetters, and other aesthetically inclined individuals to make sure things are as good as they can possibly be when I’m handling the bulk of things myself. I don’t sleep much, I’ve visibly lost weight on occasion during a publication (I ran into my friend’s husband in the grocery store parking lot when Redamancy dropped. He complimented me on the unexpected weight loss (he didn’t think I was much for dieting) but was concerned about how badly my under-eye bags had gotten—he thought I had broken my nose at a distance, since they looked like two black eyes), and I only seem to breathe easily once it’s over.

It’s hard, is what I’m getting at, and it’s pretty obvious, I think, why it’s my least favorite part of this whole thing.

Anyway, that’s the gist of my process. It’s taken years to refine it to these easily demarcated steps, and it’s what I’ve found works best for my workflow and allows me to put out a steady stream of works. Now, let’s swing over to some questions so I can be more specific! Questions come from Instagram this time.

Any writing pet peeves?

I really hate unnatural dialogue and triteness. There’s also this quirky, Joss Whedon-esque style some people go for and it’s… really grating to me. Not every line has to be a quip, and while you think you’re being zippy and quirky like that, you’re just being bland. We get nothing from a character who responds like that, and like, I can be guilty of it too. Sometimes my instinct is to default to the quirky, quippy rebuttal, but I almost always revise it on my second pass because we don’t learn anything about a character when they act like that. It’s not a personality trait—it’s a punchline.

How do you start writing something? Like, when you already know what but just don’t know how?

Say it with me kids: OUTLINE, OUTLINE, OUTLINE! If you have that done and still find yourself struggling to figure out where to start, pick the most interesting place and begin there. If the story is Twilight, we don’t start with Bella being born, or her in her old school. The story is about her going to Forks, Washington and meeting vampires, so we start with her on her way to Forks, Washington to meet vampires! The same goes for Dracula. Jonathan is already on the train to Transylvania when we begin the story. He’s on his way to the whole impetus of this plot.

Now, if you’re having issues literally just putting pen to paper, that’s normal. That’s something I have issues with too when I begin new projects, and all I do is give myself time. I typically schedule myself to finish chapters within a day or two, but if I’m just starting a new book, I give myself a full weekend just to write the very first paragraph. Most of the time, you just need to break ground. Once you’ve taken that first step, it gets a lot easier. And hell, I’m the king of non-linear writing. Who says you have to start with the first page? Skip to where you want to write first, be it the climax, the sex scene, or the ending. Get comfortable and then go back to the beginning, and seriously, don’t sweat things. You can rewrite a bad beginning. Write utter horseshit if you have to and edit it later. You’ll find your flow once you start and that’s always the most important thing.

How do you know where to take your story and what direction to move the plot in?

Oh, I get this a lot with my own projects. I currently have a few concepts or character dynamics I really want to play with but haven’t because I haven’t figured out how to execute it yet. I think the big thing to think about is what do you concretely have in your head for it, and are you sure you’re pursuing the proper medium for it? Sometimes it’s not a book. Sometimes it’s a movie, or a comic, or a visual novel. Some ideas are too big to be possible in the format you’re trying to fit it in, and again, outlining will give you the best understanding of what sort of story it is you’re trying to tell. Also, a lot of issues when it comes to getting over those initial roadblocks at the start of a project is making sure you know where you’re going with it. Do you know what your conflict is? Do you know where the rising action is? It may sound very high school English class, but those story structures exist for a reason. I had tons of issues writing Infaust until I went back in and properly outlined what my actual conflicts were.

If you’re going to try my method of doing chapter notes, my trick is to write up basic headers like Chapter 1, 2, 3, etc. until I hit like, I don’t know, Chapter 15. Then I fill in as much as I can where I think things should happen. So, if I know the beginning few chapters, I fill those in. Then, say I know the climax. I skip to Chapter 12 and fill that in. It’s easy with the climax in place to fill in to the ending, and then I just connect the dots, filling in where I know I want certain things to go until I have a complete outline. From there, you refine, refine, refine. If you don’t know what your basic story points are, you aren’t ready to tell this story. Concentrate on figuring out what those are and it all should fall into place.

How do you manage the whole “show, don’t tell” thing?

Lord, I could probably do another ten blog posts just on instructional writing. I mean… maybe. I don’t know if I’m the best teacher to begin with, and a lot of what I do is based on instinct and vibes. The best advice I can give you on something like this is to remove your author brain while you write from a character’s pov and try to embody them as they go through the scene. They aren’t going to simply state things. They're going to relate to the world around them based on how it makes them feel, and you’re always going to be building character moments and associations as they interact with things. Instead of saying “The war was bad and unpopular,” relate to it the way the character would. Why is it bad and unpopular? How have they been affected by it? They’re more likely to tell you via an anecdote how the war killed their brother and father and reduced their remaining family to begging to get by than to just list off the political goings-on of the day. I guess just be asking yourself why a lot as you write, and read things aloud to see if what you’re writing sounds natural.

Of course, I can’t just tell you to always be doing that. Sometimes, you really can just say something. You don’t need to show everything, and mild, well-applied exposition is necessary for any good story to work. There’s never going to be one proper rule for a lot of writing questions like this. You need to practice your craft, read a lot of other peoples’ stuff, and experiment until you get the feel for it yourself.

I actually received about three times as many questions this month as I was able to answer in this blog post. Apparently there’s quite a demand for this topic? I’ll try to do some planning to better prepare for stuff like this, and I may even ask my editor if they’re willing to answer some questions as well if you guys would be interested in something like that. We are, of course, not teachers or experts on a lot of this. We can’t run a class or seminar, but I suppose we can do our best.

But for right now, that’s it for this month! It was a long one this time, but I don’t mind much, and I hope you guys don’t either.

We’re going to be gearing up for the holiday season soon, and I hope to have some new merch to unveil right in time for all your Christmas shopping needs. Keep an eye out for that, and good luck in your writing adventures!

As always, until next time!

T.D. Cloud

#author blog #blog #writing advice

3 notes · View notes

hyohaehyuk · 11 months

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youtube

Taka appears around at 2:08 and 2:16 from each video respectively (well his voice even tho he appeared on the screen. i wish there is videos from that. I finally found some footage of taka on the screen. i wish there was more videos)

At 4: 16 and 2:56 (from each video respectively) is the famous part where when asked what taka is for him, he said that taka is his 1st wife, tomoe is the 2nd wife and since he forgot kaoru (😭) he said she is the 1.5 wife XD

And then taka said he would work harder to not fall from that position XD

They also ask taka about takeru and he said that if he is the wife, takeru is the husband but the reverse is also true (aka him being the husband and takeru the wife) XD

youtube

After 6:36, I think takeru and taka was talking about the "Rurouni kenshin" theme songs

By the automatic translation it seems that takeru have quite a saying into RK OST since it seems he was choosing the song together with taka

I wish someone translated those videos :(

Bc i cant find any, i use the google translation to translate this article and this one:

"Director Otomo and ONE OK ROCK's Taka, who performs the theme song throughout the series, also appeared remotely, but Sato said, "ONE OK ROCK saw the movie before anyone else. I wonder if it's finished yet?'' When I was so excited, Taka told me, "It was really good,'' he confessed. For Kyoto Inferno Arc/The Legend's End'', I composed the music in America, came back to Japan, and was so excited that I was asked to listen to about three songs. I was told, "You can choose whatever you like.'' While listening to it at the counter, I cried quite a bit on the spot,'' he said, "Even though I was worried about it, I realized that I liked Taka's voice in ``Heartache.'' I chose a song that had the vocals in front.'' .

When asked to express Taka's presence as a comrade in words, Sato flatly replied, "He's my wife." When he points out, Wife 1 (Taka) and Wife 2 (Arimura),'' the MC asks, Kaoru is…'' and then says, Kaoru is Wife 1.5.'' In response to this, Taka said, "I will try my best not to fall from the position of wife number one. We are friends, and I think we are also like each other. If I were the wife, then (Sato) would be the husband, but… I think the opposite is also true, and I think we have a really good relationship and get along well.''

During the stage greeting, each of the four members confessed about their "happy moments".Arimura said, "I have a houseplant at home, but it's a houseplant that lives a long time by repeatedly dying and putting out new buds.'' I love it so much that when the new buds appear, It’s really cute and makes me happy,” she said with a smile.

In response, Sato excited the audience by revealing, ``I'm a late night person. I worked hard all day and even ate dinner (lol).''

On the other hand, Taka confessed, "It's when you work hard to write and record songs, and after a break, you feel like, There's nothing tomorrow'' or ``I don't have time for myself.''

Meanwhile, director Otomo commented, ``Watching the passionate relationship between Takeru and Taka, it makes me feel happy,'' referring to the two who showed their closeness throughout the stage greeting, and expressed his feelings towards their relationship. "I was very impressed".

google translation of this article:

"Ever since Sato and Taka met when they were teenagers, they have spent time together influencing each other. Taka, who was in charge of the theme songs for all of the Rurouni Kenshin' series said: "Our life as a band was with Rurouni Kenshin.' I feel a little sad that it ended with 'The Beginning,' but at the same time, I feel relieved.''

Taka went on, "I love The Beginning,'' adding "Up until now, the focus has been on action, but in this work, I feel like I'm being ripped off in a painful way, and as a Japanese person, I've found myself feeling overwhelmed many times. It made me feel so good," he praised.

　In response to Taka's words, Sato said with a smile: "Taka told me he liked 'The Beginning' from the first time he saw the movie,'' and added, "As a Japanese person, I felt the same way. Now, I feel happy that the spirit of ``The Beginning'' has been conveyed,'' he said with joy.

　After that, episodes were shown that showed Sato and Taka's private interactions and their relationship of mutual trust, and the host asked the question, "What kind of person is Taka to Sato?'' After thinking about his answer for a while, Sato shyly said, "He's my number one wife.'' At Sato's words, Taka laughed and said, I have to make sure I don't fall down (from the position of wife)...'' and then said, "Takeru is my friend, and we're good friends. If I were the wife, would Takeru be the husband? The relationship would be the other way around.' "There are some things," he said, admitting that they had a honeymoon relationship."

google translation of this article:

On this day, ONE OK ROCK's Taka, who was in charge of the theme song for all series, and director Keishi Otomo also participated remotely. Regarding this film, Taka revealed his thoughts on the film, saying, "As a Japanese person, I felt sad, but it made sense to me,'' adding, "When Director Otomo gave me time to talk after watching the movie, he said, ``I'll leave it to you.'' When I was asked to sing the theme song for the first time, I felt a lot of pressure, but as the episodes went on, I started to think that it was important to write songs the way I felt. I went there," he recalls.

Sato said, "Taka composed the theme song "Heartache'' for "Rurouni Kenshin: The Legend Ends'' in the United States, and when he came back to Japan, he excitedly played three songs to me. While listening to it at the counter of a restaurant, I was told "You can choose whatever you like,'' and I cried quite a bit on the spot. They're all good, so I said, "I want them all to be theme songs'' he says, revealing an episode from that time. "I was thinking about it, but I chose that song because I liked Taka's voice in ``Heartache,''' he said revealing the story behind the song.

When it came to the relationship between the two, Sato laughed and said, "He's my wife. My wife is 1, and my wife is 2 (Arimura).Kaoru (Kamiya) is my wife 1.5,'' and Taka also said, "We're friends and comrades. It's really great. We get along well because of our relationship,'' he says, showing how close they are. On the topic of happy moments, Arimura said, "Seeing new sprouts coming out of a houseplant is cute and makes me happy,'' and Director Otomo commented on the interaction between Sato and Taka, "Seeing the passionate relationship between Takeru and Taka makes me happy.''" he replied.

At the end, Sato said, "I feel like it'll end when I say, Thank you, everyone.'' I hope it's a long run, and I want to make the most of the remaining release period, so I'd like to say today. Instead of closing with "Thank you", I would like to close with "See you again", and I look forward to your continued support.'' I hope you will continue to support "Rurouni Kenshin.'' Finished the stage greeting.

google translation of this article:

In addition, Taka, who participated remotely from the United States, said, "We also wrote the theme songs for all the works, and along with Rurouni Kenshin, our life as a band was also there. It finally ended with ``The Beginning.'' I'm sad to see it go away, but I'm also relieved, but I'm confident that it's a work filled with great soul," he said, expressing his thoughts.

Sato and Taka are said to be good friends in their private lives, so what kind of person is Taka to Sato? Sato laughed and said, "He is my wife," and then said, "My wife 1, my wife 2," and then pointed at Arimura. When asked by the MC, So, what about (heroine Kamiya) Kaoru?'', he answered, "Kaoru is 1.5 years old.''

In response, Taka said, "I want to do my best not to fall from the position of wife number one,'' and then, regarding Sato, "I think we are both friends and colleagues, and if I'm the wife, then (Sato) is also the husband, so we have a very good relationship and get along very well,'' he said of the passionate friendship between the two.

google translation of this article:

Taka (ONE OK ROCK) remotely participated in the stage greeting to thank the blockbuster success of the movie "Rurouni Kenshin: The Beginning " starring Takeru Sato , which was held at Marunouchi Piccadilly in Tokyo on June 12th. ONE OK ROCK has been in charge of the theme songs throughout the series, and also wrote a new song "Broken Heart of Gold'' as the theme song for the final episode. In addition to Taka, Otomo participated remotely in the stage greeting, and Sato and Kasumi Arimura, who plays Tomoe, took to the stage at Marunouchi Piccadilly.

Sato touched on the film's release last week, saying, "I've been running through the promotional period for this movie, and I feel like I'm finally heading towards my goal. I've been wanting to keep promoting this movie forever.” he said with a look of regret.

"Taka-san!" called out the MC, and Taka appeared on the screen. Taka describes his current state of mind by saying, "I feel like I've spent my life as a band with "Rurouni Kenshin.'' I feel a little sad that it's over, but also a little relieved.'' He also commented on "Rurouni Kenshin Final Chapter: The Beginning,'' saying, ``The focus was on the action scenes, but it was also heartbreaking, and as a Japanese person, it was a work that I could easily relate to.'' Responding to this, Sato said, ``All the One Ok Rock members watch the movie before anyone else. I heard from Taka, ``That was really good (lol)." You said earlier, "As a Japanese,'' and I thought the same thing, and Taka is mostly in the United States, so I think that's why he has a strong sense of being Japanese.'' Taka, who is still in the United States said, "I'm trying to embody the spirit of a samurai here,'' he said with a smile.

Regarding "Broken Heart of Gold,'' Arimura said, "The melody is mostly piano, and it conveys a delicate feeling, and the lyrical content comes straight to me, and in a sense, because it hasn't been fleshed out in many ways, it really touches my heart." she says quietly. Regarding the affinity between OOR's songs and the "Rurouni Kenshin'' series, Otomo said, "When I listen to the finished theme song, I get the feeling that OOR's lyrics are discovering the spirit of the movie and what is hidden deep within the movie. I felt it from the moment I saw it. I think that the whole package until the end of the one-off music, and I think that when you watch it up to that point, you'll be able to convey everything we wanted to convey." Regarding the production of the theme song for the series, Taka said, "Director Otomo always told me, "I'll leave it to you,'' in the first movie and that was actually a lot of pressure. My thinking changed to the fact that the most important thing was to make the songs the way I wanted. This time, the moment I finished watching it, the first notes were ringing in my head, so I cherished that first inspiration when creating the song. "I'm doing it," he said.

Taka and Sato are close friends in their private lives as well. When asked by the host what kind of person Taka is, Sato emphatically replied, "My wife." Afterwards, when asked about Arimura, who plays Tomoe next to her, he added, "(pointing at Taka) Wife 1, (pointing at Arimura) Wife 2.'' Furthermore , he introduced Kaoru Kamiya, played by Emi Takei , saying, "My wife is 1.5.'' Taka said, "I want to do my best so that I don't fall from the top. Takeru is a friend and a comrade, and if i were his wife, Takeru would be my husband, but I think the reverse could also be true.'' When asked how he felt as this was his first time doing a stage greeting, he said with a somber expression, ``I don't really feel like I'm doing a stage greeting (lol). For me, it feels like I've reached a turning point in my life.''

#takeru sato #takeru satoh #rurouni kenshin #taka #one ok rock #takaru #takatake #for sure taka unbuttoned his shirt just for takeru 🤭 such a h*e #anyway i am starting to wonder that if when he signed his contract to make those movies #he didn't had a clause that OOR would make the themes songs for all movies XD #i expect nothing less coming from OOR No.1 fan

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kaddyssammlung · 1 year

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~Part 1 of my journey~

I wrote something yesterday evening...it was just flowing out of me. It is only part 1. Idk if that is triggering or could be. It's just about the begging of my aclohol addiction and how it changed. It's not edited yet also. I don't care right now. It's 4.am. again XD

So I already wrote somewhere that I was twelve when I started stealing some alcohol from my parents. I don't have much memory of it. It's curiosity that got me there. They had “Met” in the fridge and there were bees on it and it reminded me of honey. So I drank it. I liked it. That's moment you already have a problem. Not being disgusted by the burning sensation but actually liking it as a kid. That is weird.

My brother and I were home alone a lot. My parents were self-employed and they also had horses. After spending most of the day working, the had to take care of their horses, while I was at home taking care of myself and my younger brother. He is almost three years younger than me.

Since one was around it was easy to just take something. No would suspect something. I liked just taking a glass and pouring all kinds of things together. Not much but enough to make me feel warm and slightly dizzy. I don't remember how often I did that. When I was around 15 I became anorexic. The drinking stopped because of the calories. Here and there I had something but it was with someone else present like my parents or the celebrate something. In Germany (don't like that word...it's not the right one btw. But that's a different topic...it's Deutschland) you are allowed to have some alcohol when you are 16. Nothing too hard such as Vodka or something like that.

I liked the way it made me feel but I was scared because I knew there were so many calories in all of this.

When I turned 18 something inside of me came online, so the speak. The alcoholic that had been hiding. As soon as you turn 18 you can have anything. I would usually buy a bottle of Rum or Vodka on Thursdays. I was still not finished with Grammar school back then. So I had school on Fridays but I did not care. Being hungover one day was fine. That bottle lasted the whole weekend. Well at least in the begging. I started needing more on the weekends but I kept that shedule. When my final exams came closer I felt more under pressure and started drinking more frequently. I still remember my final English exam. I was so damn hungover. I had to analyze a text about Dollywood. Well Dolly Parton I am very sorry but I did not like that. Anyway. I made it through, got my grades and then what?! I had “the Abitur”. This means you can go to any university you like. But I was not interested in that. I barley remember that summer. All I did was getting drunk. When autumn came I actually did go to university. The city is called Bayreuth. If you are a fan of classical music then you might know this city. I don't think it is known for anything else other than Richard Wanger. Whatever. I studied geology and chemistry. Well not really though. I would drive there sometimes and hand around but not really participate. When I came home I drank a lot. The next day I would drag myself out of bed and drive there again. I went by train. I kept that charade up until February of 2009 or so?! That was half a year after school had ended. I told my parents that I could not study and that I wanted to do an apprenticeship instead. I was allowed and could start right away. The reason being that I started in their store. I've been working there ever since. I did get a bachelor's degree somewhere in between. We have a University of Applied sciences here in this city.

My drinking was kind of okay. I was able to function when it was needed and I crashed horribly whenever I had the time to do so.

#addiction recovery #mental health #mental illness #mental health blog #alcohol addiction #addiction

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stargazer-balladeer · 3 years

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S/o’s birthday but locks themselves in their rooms because they don’t feel special [Genshin Impact]

Characters Included: Aether, Childe, Diluc, Kaeya & Venti.

Notes: Ayeeee! Since it’s my birthday today, why not make this? :))) I actually got carried away 🥲 this is around 3.5k words in total. Hope ya’ll like this!

Reader’s Gender: Neutral (tho i think there’s a slight implied female hehe…)

Warning: probably some swear words here and there knowing me- and mild suggestive themes in kaeya’s part

[albedo, scaramouche, xiao]

Aether remembers your birthday more than he knows his- like srsly, he’s the kind that remembers his s/o’s bday more than his. He’s also the kind that celebrates it privately unless you want to celebrate it with others, which he doesn’t mind. He might have a hard time deciding what kind of gift you want, but sooner or later, he already has one (or multiples bc he can’t decide-).

Imagine his confusion when your day finally arrives but he can’t find you anywhere, even Paimon, who was excited to celebrate your bday (“oohh~ I can’t wait to eat the cake!” - Paimon), seems confused. Probably the culprit in planting worry in the travellers head as she jumps to conclusion that you might’ve been kidnapped.

Luckily, he checked your house before he could report it to the knights of Favonius or the Qixing (like any normal person should do really-). When he received no reply, he takes out the spare key you gave him and entered your house, an invasion of privacy he knows but it's an emergency-

Knowing that you’re in your room when he can’t find you downstairs, he knocks on your bedroom door softly while calling your name. Imagine his (and Paimon’s) relief when the door cracked open. Immediately engulfing you into a hug, he lets out a sigh of relief. He then proceeds to ask you what you were doing inside your room when it’s your birthday. His heart literally broke when you stated your reason. Tightening his hold around your figure, he smiles bitterly, knowing that feeling all too well..

“That’s not true. None of that stuff is true. Everyone deserves to feel special on their birthday, most especially you. We’ve brought some food, and cake of course. Also some gifts from other people. If you want, do you want to celebrate it with just the two, or rather three, of us?”

You, who was a literal angel in his eyes deserve the world. He honestly wants to find whoever put that idea in your head but that was reserved for another moment. For now, his main priority is your happiness. Guiding you downstairs where Paimon was (she left when aether hugged you, knowing you two needed privacy. also the cAKE-), he watches as your eyes sparkle at the sight of the cake.

Grinning softly he made sure you had fun with your birthday. Even though it would be more fun with more people, it feels more special if it’s celebrated with just the two of you. Staring you with pure adoration as you laughed merrily at the sight of Paimon stuffing herself with food. He couldn’t help himself but lean forward to place a kiss on your forehead and then on your lips, leaning back with a smile on his face.

“Happy birthday, my love. May many more to come. Maybe next time, we can invite other people. Though I don’t mind if we’ll celebrate it with just the two of us only-” And Paimon! Don’t forget about Paimon!” “Yes yes. And Paimon.”

Similar to Aether, he would most definitely remember your birthday. After all, it holds a special place in his heart, alongside his family. And since this boi is rich af, he would most definitely try to spoil you on your birthday. Piles of expensive (or just cheap yet meaningful) gifts, reservation to a high-class restaurant in Liyue Harbor, and all that glamour.

Actually, he didn’t find it odd that he didn’t see you immediately, thinking that you overslept or just relaxing in your house. But he soon finds it weird when it’s already around 3 in the afternoon and no sign of your face in the crowd, something he raised a brow at but shrugged it off. It isn’t until it’s almost the time of the reservation he made when he finally realized what’s going on.

When he arrived at your house, dressed in a suit similar to Zhongli except it’s entirely black and white, waiting for you to come out. After a couple of minutes, he soon got concerned and decided to enter your bedroom through the window (pls do not do this at home). Startled at the sudden appearance of your handsome yet cheeky boyfriend, he stares at you with eyes asking the questions he didn’t dare to tell.

Knowing he will get his answer one way or another, you decided to tell him about your dilemma. After you finished explaining yourself, silence surrounds you, which is quite worrisome since your boyfriend is known for his rather talkative behavior. Blinking in surprise at the sudden embrace of the 11th Harbinger, his hug was rather tight but not too tight that it cuts your oxygen. Speaking in a low, faint voice, a surprising feat for him, you can make out what he said as clear as day.

“I’m sorry. I should’ve noticed it sooner. I was trying to be a perfect boyfriend for you but I guess I failed in that aspect. You know, if you feel like you aren’t special enough to celebrate your birthday, then what about me? Me who stained his hands with the red blood of his enemies, always engaging in a fight, clashing with other blades. Insecurity is really an asshole huh? Let me make it up to you now. Let’s not anymore go to that stupid high-class restaurant, c’mon, up you go. You better dressed comfortably when I come back or else…”

Leaving you quickly before coming back immediately, this time in more comfortable clothing rather than the stiff suit he wore earlier. This time as well, he entered your house normally through the door. In his arms, he was holding a bunch of stuff and proceeded to dump it on the living room table. It was different kinds of movies in different genres, you spotted some of your favorite movies in them (makes you also wonder where he got these from since you don’t remember seeing these in the room he stays-).

He would suggest making a pillow fort, and while making the pillow fort, he proceeded to smack you with one. Which ensued a pillow fight between you two. It successfully made the both of you a laughing mess by the end, filled with feathers. Childe then carries you bridal style to the incomplete pillow fort and starts the movie you chose. Placing you in his lap and placing his head either on your shoulder or head depending on your height, cuddling you from behind tightly with a contented smile on his face.

“You know what? This might not be how I envisioned how your birthday would go, but I’m not complaining. Happy birthday, comrade. My most adorable and most cutest and only love. I love you so much that you’ll be the very reason why I die so suddenly. So stop being so cute okay?”

(You two are living together in this one.)

Diluc has the probability of forgetting your birthday due to his busy schedule, especially if it’s starting to rise when your birthday draws near. He might neglect you for a couple of days, too engrossed in his work. When the day finally arrives, it completely leaves his mind. Like he’ll think of it as a completely ordinary working day. It isn’t until one of your friends told him to send you their birthday greetings that he remembered. And oh boy does he feel guilty, like srsly, he literally froze when he realizes what day it is today. And you know what that means? ✨Panicc✨

Honestly, I can see him buying the whole store XD. In the state of panic, his common sense just leaves him completely that he ends us buying practically the whole store. It would be sent to the Dawn Winery immediately as he buys some flowers from Flora, who also sent you her birthday greetings, which made him more guilty-

When Diluc steps foot inside the manor, he tries to search for you outside the gardens where he usually finds you but when he doesn't, he gets worried. Asking the head maid immediately about your whereabouts, and his concern and worry (and guilt) grew even more when he finds out that you haven’t gone out of your room. He quickly went to your shared room, with the flowers still in his hands, and knocked on your door. Calling your name softly and asking for permission to enter, when granted he entered the room as quickly as possible. But seeing the sight of you bundled up in your blanket made his heart crack.

Placing the flowers at the bedside table, he quickly made his way in front of you and kneeled down to meet your eye level. You can tell he was very worried about you with how frantic his eyes seem and the concern underlying it. With the way he was staring at you, you can’t help but spill your insecurity to him. The reason why you were hiding in his room rather than go out to celebrate your day of birth. Every word you spill made his heart break even more. Seeing tears started to leak from your eyes, he placed his two hands on your face wiping away the tears with his thumbs. Smiling at you gently and placing a kiss on your eyelids and on your nose.

“I completely understand, my love. Even I sometimes feel that way. Also to the point where I don’t want to celebrate my birthday even, but that won’t do my love. You are so special, you deserve your special day to be well special. If you want to simply lay here and sleep, then so be it. If you want to go out and do something, then I’ll happily oblige. Let’s obliterate those awful thoughts, and if those keep persisting, I’ll slice them up for you. I’ll keep picking you up when you fall. So, what is your command, my love?” (i'm so tempted for him to say master-)

Whatever your answer may be, one thing for sure, Diluc is seen smiling adoringly at you. Even the maids noted how soft the master is around you, particularly today. Whether curled up together in the bed, with him embracing you tightly to his chest and placing a kiss on top of your head. And if you listen carefully, you can hear him quietly humming a tune that his father (or mother) sang to him. Or you two outside in the garden, simply admiring the view with his hand around your waist.

Either way, at the end of the day, he would wake you up or make you go inside for dinner. You haven’t eaten breakfast or lunch yet so you’re probably hungry by now. If you don’t want to leave your room or want to return to your room, he would understand and make the maids bring the food to you. When the maid(s) finally arrives with the food, you notice the cake on the tray. Looking at him as he chuckles, taking the trays from the maids. Humming a light tune, he scoops a spoonful of cake and holds it to your mouth, with a slight smirk on his face, eyes twinkling with mischief.

“Stop staring at me like that, did you really think I would let the day go by for you to not celebrate your birthday properly? From what I know, birthdays have cakes in them, whether a huge cake or a cupcake. Say ‘ahh’~... Happy birthday my love. May next year be more enjoyable than now.”

Kaeya remembers your birthday like the back of his hand, I think he’s even more excited than you really. Eagerly awaiting your birthday as he counts down the days, dropping hints and stuff to you birthday-related, and probably plans a birthday party for you. The knights immediately agreed on it, including a certain bard, traveler, and wine master (albeit more hesitantly). He made sure that this party would be successful, constantly checking on the plans and such. To the point that everyone was practically fed up with his constant questions. But they understand that he wants this to be a successful and enjoyable party for you. It got to the point where Diluc kicked him out of his Tavern after asking for the umpteenth time.

When your day finally arrives, he was practically beaming with joy and excitement. To the point where he can’t hide it behind the cool and suave facade he wears. He quickly made his way to you, going along with the plan of distracting you as they started to prepare for the party. In his total excitement, he didn’t notice the rather gloomy atmosphere around the house. But when he arrived at your door, that is when he noticed how quiet your house is.

Now albeit worried, his excited smile slipping from his face and now replaced with a worried frown, he knocked on your door, calling you in his usual teasing voice. When he didn’t hear your response, the bubble of anxiety appeared in his body. Twisting the knob and finding it unlocked, he quietly and carefully opened the door. Seeing your back immediately, seeing your side rise and fall making him sigh in relief that you were still alive. Closing the door gently but made a noise to alert you of his presence. Taking a seat behind you, he ran his cold fingers on your back, watching you arching at the sudden coldness of his fingers. Smiling slightly, he asked what’s wrong.

Turning around to face him, you buried your face on his chest, inhaling his strong masculine scent. Instinctively wrapping his arms around you, he played with your hair with one of his hands. Tapping on your head slightly, beckoning for you to answer his question. With no way out, you decided to come clean. You explain how you feel like you don’t feel like you deserve to be treated as special on your birthday and all that sort. His face was void of emotion as he stared at the ceiling with his unique pair of blue eyes. Outside he might seem emotionless. But inside, he was on the brink of insanity. Who dares to put such an idea on his s/o’s mind? Why would you think of that? Was this insecurity of yours also his fault?

“That must be the most stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. You’re not special? Please. Don’t try to make me laugh with that joke ‘cause it’s not funny. You are a jewel, a star, a constellation. As rare as the gems, or rather visions. You can even rival the very sun with your smile. I know those demons in your head keep saying those words to you, the temptation is so tempting, right? Just succumbing to them to make them quiet. But that’s why I’m here, my dearest snowflake. I’m here for you. You’re so special to everyone, most especially to me. You mean the world to me. Anyway, enough of this tear-jerking stuff, we have a party to celebrate. And we can’t celebrate it without the birthday gal/guy now can we?”

Despite your protests, he lifted you effortlessly and carried you outside and into the dawn winery where the party was held. Placing you on the ground and pushing you forward where people from Mondstadt came and greeted you with happy birthdays. Smiling at the sight of you being overwhelmed at the warm greetings, and then chuckling at how bright your face became. Diluc nudges him to you, beckoning him to help you before returning to what he was previously doing (most likely trying to force a bard to not finish all the wines in the vicinity).

After a while in the party, Kaeya brings you to a secluded place with no people for air. Being in a party filled with people could be suffocating at times, especially if you’re not used to it. He intertwined his hands with yours and bends down to meet your eye level (or leans down if you have the same height as him-). He gives you a cheeky smile and proceeds to place a peck on your lips. Chuckling when you pouted and glared at him, wanting more kisses.

“My my, what a greedy vixen~ But it is indeed your birthday so I guess I have no choice but to oblige to whatever my birthday vixen wants me to do. Would you like me to strip as well? Haha. Kidding kidding. Happy birthday, princess/prince. May many more to come. Oh! I forgot. I heard from a certain birdie that you ordered for a personal performance from me~ would you like to get it now?”

Since we all know that Venti practically doesn’t do anything like every day, I would safely say that he would remember your birthday. Probably save some mora to buy you a gift for your birthday, even though it’s not as fancy as the people in Liyue (they all rich kids-), it’s still meaningful. He probably made a bracelet all by himself with the beads he either bought or also made by himself. Nevertheless, he was as excited as Kaeya for your birthday. Already prepared songs to sing for you when that day comes.

Venti immediately searches for you when the day finally arrives, but his excited and bright smile vanishes when he can’t find you in the crowd of people. Raising a brow at your sudden disappearance, he searched for you everywhere, the tavern, the church, the headquarters, everywhere but your house. So when he finally arrives at your house, he was filled with worry and concern. Entering your room through the window like usual, he sees your figure sitting on the floor while reading a book.

He pouted at the sight as he made his presence known by asking you why you were here and reading a book on your birthday. He watches as you jump from where you are and turns to look at him, sighing at the sight of him. He slowly made his way to you and sat next to you, his legs sprawled across the floor. He takes note of the food around you, which was non-birthday festive, it was just ordinary food. Not understanding why you’re sulking in your room, he asked you what’s wrong.

Venti’s eyes widened at your explanation, feeling the sadness leaking at the words you said. They weave themselves around his heart, squeezing it, making him have a hard time breathing. He shares your pain. He was your soulmate after all. He immediately engulfed you in a hug, stuffing his face on the crook of your neck. You were so vulnerable in his eyes. You were so fragile. He desperately wants to protect you from the pain. But looks like he can’t protect you from your own demons.

“Even though I promised myself to not say or do anything that’ll make you sad, I just need to get it off my chest. I’m sorry you had to suffer through that, those demons that a simple bard that weaves stories into songs can’t erase. Alright, no more feeling sorry for yourself. It’s time to get out and spend the rest of the day enjoyable, perfect for my precious Cecilia.”

Without any warnings, he picked you up and jumped out of your window. Shrieking at the sudden fast pace, you instinctively wrapped your hands around him as he landed on the ground. Giving you a smug smile while saying “didn’t think i’d let you fall now?” Please slap him. Anyway, he laughed at your aggression and continued to run. Even if you ask where you’re going, he just says it's a secret. So might as well enjoy being in his arms as he continues to run (you swear you can feel the wind adding to his speed but that was just maybe your imagination-).

After a while, he placed you down and you realized where you are. It was Starsnatch Cliff, surrounding you were Cecilia flowers. Venti jumped on you, making you fall to the ground as he giggles. His hat flown back from the force of his sudden attack, he still has that stupid big smile on his face. Since his laughter is contagious, you couldn’t help but laugh alongside him. His eyes glistened with delight at the sight of your smile finally. Grabbing your hand and placing the bracelet he made, he pressed a kiss on your knuckle.

“This bracelet shall be a promise from me to you, a fellow bard to the fairest queen/king. I shall love you for eternity, this heart will only beat for you, and this body belongs to you. If you’re in dire need of assistance, don’t hesitate to call me. I’ll be there, forever and always. Happy birthday, my sweet flower.”

[x] Main Page || [x] Mondstadt Page || [x] Fatui Harbingers Page

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact headcanons #aether #aether x reader #childe #childe x reader #diluc #diluc x reader #kaeya #kaeya x reader #venti #venti x reader #aether headcanons #childe headcanons #diluc headcanons #kaeya headcanons #venti headcanons

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putschki1969 · 2 years

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Kyoichi Sato Blog post

For the past few weeks Kyo-sama has been doing an introduction series on his blog. He talks about members of the Kajiura family from his point of view. His focus is on all the vocalists and musicians who are participating in YKL#17. Keiko had to wait VERY long for her entry in the series (and it seems she kept nagging Kyo-sama about it XD) but last week, it was finally her turn! Without further ado, let’s get to it!

～ Series 『Kajiura Family As Seen Through My Eyes』 Part 10 - Songstress KEIKO ～

　This blog post featuring songstress KEIKO will be the last installment of the series for the time being. I have spent so much time with her during our YKL activities and back during the Kalafina days, I believe there is no other drummer who has had the privilege of watching this woman sing from the back of the stage as much as I have.

　We have been through a lot together, I consider her a close friend and comrade. There are too many anecdotes but I would like to share a few at least・・・One of the big things that I still remember vividly is the so-called “Anaerobic Inhalation Incident in Mexico”. We had just finished the main part of our live in a high altitude area of Mexico and were getting ready for the encore so Keiko was trying hard to fight the altitude sickness by inhaling as much of the provided oxygen as possible. However, it turned out that the valve of the oxygen cylinder had been closed the whole time so no oxygen was coming through.

　Then we have the infamous “Keiko Bathroom Confinement Incident”. During one of our live after-parties, all the guys were getting wasted drinking some heavy-duty alcohol. Keiko wanted to give it a try but after taking just a few tiny sips she ended up having to lock herself in the bathroom for quite some time

　And last but not least, the “Osaka Castle Cosplay Incident”. When I took the girls on a little tour to Osaka Castle, Keiko wasn’t at all interested in any of my countless stories about the historical background of the castle, the only thing she wanted to do was dress up as warlords inside the castle. Of course there are many more anecdotes like this and I treasure them all as fun memories when I think back on them.

　Her singing voice has a special and unique presence. When she is singing in harmony with others, she is mainly in charge of the lower parts, always supporting the main vocalist with her lower harmonies. There is a synergistic effect whenever Keiko is involved. Her strength and presence increase the more brilliant the higher harmonies are and at the same time she manages to make the high vocals sound even brighter. I think it is really rare to find a vocalist like that.

　I am always impressed by her harmonies, with her strength and sense of rhythm she is able to complement so many different singing voices, even matching our guest vocalists. I know for a fact that this kind of high quality chorus work doesn’t come out of nowhere, it requires a lot of practice.

　There is YURIKO KAIDA who has an academic background in music, KAORI who has received professional training ever since her childhood days and Wakana who was born with a naturally beautiful voice. Among all of these amazing songstresses, I’m absolutely certain that no one has had to work harder than Keiko to establish her position in the group. I think it was her unrivaled determination and strong-willed nature that made it possible. I believe it is that very same fighting spirit that made it possible for her to take on the main supportive role of Kalafina for 10 years, allowing these three beautiful flowers to bloom.

PS: I would like to talk a little more about Kalafina. Kaji-chan and Mori-san were the ones to cultivate the soil and to sow the seeds but it was the tireless effort of the three members that made this wonderful flower of music bloom to its full potential (and maybe us musicians also contributed a little bit with our slender means). Their hard work is the vertical thread that is running through 10 years worth of music, starting from the theme songs of "Garden of Sinners” right up until their final live at Nippon Budokan. And then we have the fans who have been supporting Kalafina throughout the years, they make up the horizontal thread. Together they are woven into the most beautiful and amazing tapestry. This tapestry is still in my heart and will continue to shine brightly until the end of time. It would make me very happy knowing that for all the fans, Kalafina’s music also represents an ever-lasting beautiful tapestry.

•——————•°•✿•°•——————•

Ohhhh! This was absolutely heart-wrenching and beautiful! First, I really enjoy reading those random anecdotes of Keiko from their Kalafina days. Also, I respect Kyo-sama so much for never neglecting to mention Wakana when there is talk about Kalafina. Thank you for always coming through for us!! And then that final part where he gets quite emotional about Kalafina 🙌 Made me want to listen to Wakana’s cover of “Ito”.

#kalafina #keiko #wakana #random #my translations #my translation #yuki kajiura #ykl vol 17 #kyoichi sato #sato kyoichi #yasunori mori #will be honest #I teared up a little #long text post

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navyinks · 2 years

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diary ↓

the year is half over so i want to celebrate my wins

i think finally i have developed a healthier mindset to art, of course i still have my bad days but i’m feeling a lot happier with where i’m at now compared to the start of the year. i learned to genuinely enjoy the drawing process instead of being obsessed with finishing something.

speaking of finished pieces, lately i was a little upset because i felt that my daily practice wasn’t reflected in my paintings. in particular the last feanor&maedhros piece made me really depressed because everything about it was so bad, i felt so horrible that i was drawing hours every day but this was the shitty result... but when i took a step back i realised where i went wrong. in the last three months i focused very heavily on drawing & anatomy, and did very few painting/shading exercises. so of course it was silly to expect that my finished paintings would improve when i didn’t put that much work in that area.

but when i started drawing some concept character sketches for dandelion children this week i was legitimately stunned by how much easier it was to draw humans in general. i don’t know why i didn’t believe it but doing figure drawing every single day really helped me to draw human figures quickly and effortlessly, and they also look much better than whatever i was doing before. the human body is no longer a mystery to me and i can feel confident to say now that i know how to draw a human xD

so i concluded that all the work i’ve been doing has really paid off - i improved in the exact same area that i practiced. in the end, it turned out that everything was fine and i’m not permanently broken when it comes to art. maybe there is some hope for me after all x’D

but i also realised that the past three months have been the only time in my whole, entire life that i’ve consistently sat down every day to practice the fundamentals. even last year during lockdown, i binged an entire anatomy course and then abruptly stopped practicing after that because i burnt out too fast. in the past i was far too distracted by the finished product to have any patience to sit down and practice. so i guess i also found the key to having balance in my art endeavors. i think that might be the most valuable lesson i’ve learned this year.

idk who will read this but going forward i will probably stop drawing much else outside of daily practice. tbh i’m already not very interested in drawing anything else, it’s hard to want to make polished work when i know my fundamentals are still so shakey. but i think i will still make an effort for a completed piece every month. i only wish that i can still continue to afford the time and energy to practice every day now that labwork is really picking up >.<”

#personal

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hungnitan · 2 years

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Mixed Event 白熱！神高応援団! Summary

Kamiyama event again ! Unexpected but a very welcoming one !

Additional Info : For better understanding this event, I suggest to read some Chinese Three Kingdom material (lol)

PS : my laptop finally comeback everyone !!! so I gonna work hard for Wan! and Prosekai translation onward~

Event Bonus : Rui + Mizuki + Akito + Ena + Luka WxS

Feature : Member Bonus + An Touya Tsukasa Emu Nene + WxS Virtual Singers

Summary (Twitter) :

Summary (Mine) : Good ol sport festival I guess~ with addition this sport festival had Chinese three kingdom theme so teams split into three color (Blue, Red and Green) with lottery with blue team had Rui Mizuki An, Tsukasa Akito for red team and Nene Touya in green team

If you ask why those three color, it’s about three kingdom split into three faction with Wei (blue) Shu (green) and Wu (red)

In shorts this event is all about Rui helped produce his team’s cheerleading group after get persuasive by Mizuki An and their captain (NPC in Rui before change card). Of course their performance kinda change into WxS annual show bungee jumping then using explosion everywhere

Mentionable Scene + Card Time and Place :

This card happened at WxS Sekai, while Rui explaining Three Kingdom as that become Kamiyama school sports festival theme, he mentioned Liu Bei (劉備 = Ryuubi). Then Miku tells she don’t understand anything as the book Rui brought to Sekai before are hard for her so she asked Luka if she know that person. Luka say about cucumber, things Kappa eats (胡瓜 = Kyuuri) since it sounds near

Ena include in this event as she forgot to give her work so she need to go to school which happened on festive day. Then she meets Mizuki along the way and heard all information include Akito participate in cheerleading competition. So out of spite (lol) she want to watch~

These two card happened at borrowing competitions, as Mizuki and Akito participate in that competition those two need to borrow something to finish. While Mizuki only need to borrow a ribbon (they get from Ena which happened to passed by) while Akito need to borrow “someone loud” and that’s why second picture happened (lol)

Funny enough at borrowing spot Akito while carrying Tsukasa still won the first place eventhough he’s started from second place behind Mizuki (XD)

This card happened after festival ended, blue team cheerleading captain (left) give some applause on Rui as he can make spectacular performance for competitions

Then again AkitoTsukasa comedic scene keep popping here (lol) like Akito dragged to participate in cheerleading competition by Tsukasa or Akito carrying Tsukasa in borrowing competition scene

Things I Confuse : Why Blue team presenting Liu Bei stories at cheerleading competitions ? If you’re one of Three Kingdom freaks (lol) we all know blue means Cao Cao not Liu Bei... Well I guess since Cao Cao doesn’t have good image (lol)

Rarity I agree for some characters but I think An deserve a card as she keep appear along with Mizuki, better swap Luka to An...I don’t remember Luka role in this event~

Chinese theme to match this event sports festival theme, for Rui’s it’s mentioned at story event that he’s pretty similar to Zhuge Liang (stage producer = strategist) and well... tbh I can’t grasp the other two (or three include Akito since it’s too second guessing maybe Shu’s member don’t know)

as I love for having them, as always my 20 pull keep getting me different *4, but this time I’m getting Tsukasa so not so maddening~

Edit : it become 40 pull and I getting Mizuki again~

#project sekai #prosekai #rui kamishiro #mizuki akiyama #ena shinonome #akito shinonome #luka wxs

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well-its-not-human-anymore · 3 years

Note

Hi! Could I get HC from the guys? 👀 How they would always react to catching the reader seeing them "badly", in addition to the fact that he usually avoids them, but with his brothers it is incredible and they feel bad because they think they do not like him. But she actually likes them and she looks at them like that because she "studies" them to draw them and she is too clumsy and shy to talk to them, that's why she ends up avoiding them. Until finally he catches her drawing them with lots of hearts or maybe they'll find her notebook with lots of portraits of them.

It's kind of funny because when I study people to draw them, they think that I look at them with hatred xd maybe I should increase my glasses prescription

God, glasses are such a pain in the ass but I have to wear them. If I don't anyone within my near vicinity doesn't have a face. But why they gotta get dirty so easily???? Makes me wanna explode or something

TMNT Headcanons

The boys w/ a quiet reader who is fine with his brothers but acts cold around him and stares a lot

Michaelangelo

mikey couldn't describe his disappointment upon realizing that you didn't want to be friends with him

well, you never actually said that to him

but he was pretty sure it was the case

you'd never made an effort to be friends with him

stared at him an awful lot though, but there was always something off about your gaze when you looked at him

like you were sizing him up, scrutinizing him, like he was an opponent

it kinda worried him

to add to that, you didn't even attempt to look embarrassed when he caught you staring

you'd just stare harder

on your end it was quite the opposite

you always found the brothers fascinating and you LOVED studying their anatomy, you'd confessed this to Donnie early on and he happily indulged in your questions

and you loved how easily you got along with the boys

well, except for Mikey

but it wasn't for a lack of trying

whenever the orange sporting turtle came around your normally flamboyant personality crept back into its little corner and hid

any words of excitement that had previously been with you died in your throat

for the longest time you didn't understand it

and you hated not understanding things, so you turned to your only outlet

that's how you ended up with an entire sketchbook full of the youngest brother in vastly different styles and poses

you had a separate book for the others, none of them as detailed as this

and when you stared to analyze you'd fallen into a habit of not looking away when caught

by your logic, if you stared back hard enough he'd look away first or just assume you'd zoned out

he didn't

and on one hectic day you'd left your sketchbook open on the kitchen table in your rush to get to work

you hadn't even noticed the slip up until Leo texted you to let you know during your shift

instant panic

in truth, Mikey was the one who discovered the book upon waking up from his nap and he'd spent the next three hours analyzing every drawing

when you finally dropped in after work to grab your book the turtle was waiting for you with it in hand

he'd asked you if you hated him

you told him no and accepted your sketchbook from him

he was relieved and screaming excitedly, just in his head

"Do you maybe wanna hang out sometime?"

You sighed in relief and nodded

"If you're cool with it- you don't think I'm weird do you?"

"I mean- you are talking to a turtle..."

you lightly shoved his chest and smiled, although it faded within a second

"Oh hush, 10 o'clock tomorrow? I'll bring snacks."

he was so stunned he could only shoot you finger guns in approval

Donatello

Donnie genuinely couldn't understand your unease around him

he'd followed all the proper expectations of holding a conversation

he was polite and engaging

so why wouldn't you talk to him?

this boy has read so many social blogs to try and figure out what he was doing wrong and he just couldn't put his finger on it

you were fine with the rest of his brothers, you'd stay up for hours laughing and gaming with them

you'd even sat still long enough to listen to Leo explain some old Japanese myth that he'd read about in a book

but with him it was always a quick, cordial greetings and farewells with bland small talk in between

Donnie had picked up pretty quickly that you weren't interested in any sort of interaction with him

and he convinced himself that that was okay

but that didn't explain the staring

he'd caught you in the act several times, eyes narrowed and locked on him

especially when you were alone with him in a room or just in the lair

the poor turtle just couldn't put his finger on it

then he caught you drawing, he noticed early on that you always carried a small sketchbook on your person but he didn't think much of it

and it wasn't so much that he caught you drawing, in fact, he wouldn't have noticed if you hadn't snapped at him while he was trying to do a sudoku puzzle

"Damn it Donnie! Stop moving! If I fuck this arm up one more time I'm gonna decompose!"

he'd quickly moved back into the position he was in prior

"sorry?"

but you'd gone silent again, occasionally glancing up from your work and running your eyes along his frame before looking down again

nearly twenty minutes later Donnie had finished the puzzle and it seemed as though you had finished your drawing

"Uh- can I ask what are you-"

"I'm drawing you but you kept moving your arm and making me mess up. You always do that when I draw you so every damn picture I have of you stays a sketch because you always come out looking like a fucking octopus."

He just stared

"Sorry, I uh- I didn't mean to explode on you like that. I'm just- I'm really bad at talking to you okay? It's so easy with everyone else but you've just gotta be so damn smart all the time and I worry that you'll think I'm boring so I just... don't talk to you?"

Donnie is stunned™

You refuse to show him the drawing until you can complete the line art and color it

But at least he knows that you don't hate him

Leonardo

To be completely honest Leo didn't mind that you were distant from him

You created an aura of calm when you were around and you always managed to distract his brothers while you were present

And he enjoyed the alone time

But after a few months that calm acceptance turned into jealousy

Not that he would ever admit it

He would just push it off and ignore it, that usually seemed to work

So why wasn't it?

And your obvious staring problem didn't help at all

Leo didn't spend much time considering his appearance but something about your gaze made him self conscious

And he hated that with a passion

Why was it that you could hold entire debates with his siblings? Even his dad for gods sake. You'd have hour long conversations on almost everything but whenever he tried to say hello you'd make up some lame ass excuse and scamper away

He just wanted an explanation

It appeared that the answer resided in your sketchbook

You'd left it open on the couch when Raph had called you away to spar with him

Leo very delicately flipped through the pages, careful not to disturb some of the polaroid pictures of his brothers

He was admittedly surprised to find pictures of himself among the pages

One of him in a handstand, another of him meditating, there was even one of him mid sneeze that you'd recreated with pencil and paper

The image of his eyes was the most startling, but the book held no polaroid of his eyes

You drew them from memory

And he was shocked when you returned to the room and didn't immediately panic

But that might have been because he didn't try to withhold your book from you

"It took me three months to color them, your eyes. I could never get the shade of blue just right."

"I'm gonna be honest with you y/n, I really thought you didn't like me."

You had the nerve to roll your eyes and follow it with a laugh

"I don't. I mean- I do but no, you just remind me a lot of myself and I haven't exactly figured out why yet. I thought that maybe if I drew you it'd be easier to figure you out..."

"Well did it help?"

You grinned

"I'm talking to you, aren't I?"

Raphael

If there was one thing Raph hated it was not understanding something that was right in front of him

which is ironic, as a much younger version of himself probably couldn't care less

and a part of him wishes he didn't care about it so much

he wishes that your blatant avoidance of him didn't upset him

but shit, it got under his skin better than any needle ever could

was it too much to ask for you to just tell him what he said or did wrong?

was he asking too much of you?

but on the same scale you'd never shown obvious dislike towards him, you were never rude and you sure as hell didn't talk shit about him to his brothers

you got along great with them

in fact it was getting more difficult to remember a time before you became a part of his family

he'd become so used to your presence that it no longer put him off when he found you hanging around the lair

but in another sense he was certain that you hadn't spoken more than three sentences to him in your time knowing him or his family

so what was the reason

several months in he finally caught onto the staring, your narrow, glassy gaze locked onto his body and refusing to look away

he stared right back at you

this annoyed you for several reasons

because within five seconds your very peaceful drawing session had turned into a staring contest and your eyes were getting VERY dry

then you exhaled in a half-sigh and looked back down at your paper

"Huh, I guess your head is more of an oblong shape..."

he took offense to this

"What tha' hell is that supposed t'mean?"

now your eyes held more of an amused silent judgement, you begrudgingly held up your sketchbook

"I'm drawing you, you fucking walnut."

"Oh..."

now you rolled you eyes and tossed the book to him, he nearly dropped it and fumbled with the pages

your annoyance was quickly growing

"Careful with that."

He flipped through the pages at a snails pace, assumingly because he couldn't quite believe what he was seeing

you had some real talent

when he looked back up at you he was wearing that crooked smile

"and here I was thinkin' that my eyes were just green."

Hope I was able to get this down pretty well! I really enjoyed writing this one! Thanks for the patience!

-Mars 🌠

#tmnt bayverse #tmnt headcanons #tmnt x reader #writing blog #writing requests #askbox #ask response #tmnt leonardo #tmnt donatello #tmnt raphael #tmnt michelangelo

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tipsydipsydo · 3 years

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Der Geliebte

Pairing: Jungkook x artist! Reader

Gender of the Reader: female

Word Count: 6.4k

Rating: 16+

AU: non idol! Jungkook x artist! Reader AU!

Genre: strangers to lovers AU; friends to lovers AU! (idiots to lovers AU!); love at the first sight! AU; soulmate to lovers! AU (kinda?); unbelievable amount of fluff; a little angst (fluffy angst!!,); tiny amount of smut (one paragraph xD)

Warnings: tiny bit of smut/some sexual tension between both of them; Jungkook is a poor shy thing and is fucking nervous around the reader all the time; teeth rotting fluff; both are so in love with each other that they’re getting stupid to not realize it; both are insecure that they’re not meant for another... just fluff, fluff, fluff and painfully obvious pining over each other!

A/N: Hallelujah, I finally did it! After I made Sibi @borathae wait over three months for her Christmas + Birthday Fanfic I finished it two weeks to late for my sweetest Darlings Birthday! I am so incredibly sorry that I made you wait for such a long time and really, Sweetie, you have all the rights to be still mad at my stupid ass! Nevertheless... I love you so goddamn much and I hope the fic made at least a little bit up for it... Love you!!!! 💕 💕

Summary: You and Jungkook met right at the first day you opened your own atelier in Seoul after you had to leave your old home behind you. You love paint canvas with landscape motives, other people just roll with their eyes when they hear that you choose such usual, almost boring things to paint. Not so Jungkook, he seems to be different than most of visitors. It’s almost like he can read your feelings through your paintings...

Status: Edited (I am sorry for any still existing errors in here!)

[Links]:

▪My Writings

▪Blog Navigation

This following story is my intellectual property and belongs only to my blog tipsydipsydo.tumblr.com!

I’ll not accept any kind of reposting, stealing or using/editing my work!

That includes reposting my content on other social media platforms too, even when you link me as the original author.

Thank you.

* Jungkook’s POV *

"In what are you getting yourself into, Jungkook?"

I quietly ask myself as I get rid of my clothes behind the paravent and throw the dressing gown over his body which you laid out for me. My hands are sweaty, they tremble slightly and my heart beats wildly, as if it wants to jump right out of my chest. Excitement spreads throughout my body, leaving a faint feeling in my stomach and a certain blush rises in my cheeks. I still can't believe what I've gotten myself into . But... you looked at me so pleadingly with your dear and downright innocent eyes that I would have done anything for you with that look of yours. I want to make you happy, see that happy and contented smile on your lips, which always makes a whole horde of wild butterflies break out in my belly. 'Normally I was the shyness and silence in person and with you... with her, I feel for the first timesomething like peace and security. Especially when I consider how shy I usually am around women.', I ask myself and I don't really know the answer to that. But what can I do against my feelings? I don't really know, on the one hand they scare me, on the other hand they feel so exciting and new that I don't want to eliminate them at all.

I don't even know exactly when the whole thing started. In which moment my feelings for you grew, when I felt more than just fascination and admiration for you and your artwork. Six months ago, a small studio had opened in my district, your own studio. On the day of the opening I simply went to it of pure curiosity, I had always had such a weakness for art and photography.

I can still remember exactly how I stood in front of one of your works and was literally speechless and overwhelmed by this picture and all his small details. This painting represents a classic image of the countryside, which was often to be found everywhere. But this work was different. So full of small details and ornaments. It was so much more... As a viewer you can see a beautiful clearing, which is surrounded by trees and protected from too many curious eyes. The ground of this clearing is overgrown with dense and lush green grass, which from the incoming sunlight almost invites you to let yourself fall into the grass. It reminds me instantly of my carefree childhood, when I rolled in it without overthinking my actions too much and those times when I playfully wrestled with my best friends around until our clothes had grass stains all everywhere. I could almost smell the scent of wild, untamed nature. The longer I look at the picture, the greater the longing became. Maybe I could visit this beautiful place one day, together with my partner, my significant other. Playing around with each other, chasing your beloved one until you fall into the grass breathless laughing and cuddling. Maybe we could have a picnic there and feed each other with homemade sweets?

I didn’t know that such a "simple" landscape painting could touch and awaken so much more in me, in my soul. Suddenly, such a wanderlust came over me that I gasped for air and a heavy lump formed in my throat. My whole body was tingling and my heart was literally screaming to get away from this dreadfully grey and monotonous daily routine of my boring single life, for at least some weeks. I want to go to this place, where I could draw the warm and fresh, natural air could deep into my lungs and pamper myself with homemade delicacies. Just to let the soul dangle and don’t stuck with my closely clocked work life. Maybe sleep until 10 o'clock in the morning and then maybe have a nice nap later. Enjoy the warm nights and hear the crickets chirping. This longing was... irrepressible. This particular wanderlust for nature, just to be out of the city, this longing for exactly this abandoned and untouched forest clearing literally overwhelmed me. What was it for an artist who could trigger such feelings and emotions in me?

I had been so absorbed in the artwork that I had not even noticed that a person step next to me. "Do you like the work?", asked a soft melodic voice, which spoke perfect Korean, but was pervaded by a light accent, which I could not quite assign. I flinched a little, but this bright, happy laugh gave me a tingling goosebumps all over my body. What a beautiful laugh... I turned to the person who was the owner of this beautiful voice. I was startled when I realized that the artist and owner of this studio was standing in front of me personally. I recognized her again, as I had seen a small photo of her in the newspaper article that drew my attention to this beautiful studio in the first place. Already in this picture she had radiated something so strong, colorful, cheerful and lively, which caused an excited flutter in my stomach.

I admit, I already laid an eye on her just by her appearance. Unfortunately I always had a hard time getting to know people ever since, let alone to talk to women. And now having you, Y/N, personally standing right in front of me, made me feel fluffy and excited in my stomach. Nothing is left of this otherwise so sassy and self-confident man that I used to be. Only a nervous and stodgy twenty-three-year-old idiot, who did not know what to say or wanted to say, now stands in front of this stunningly pretty and intelligent woman.

Her eyes sparkles like jewels, full of joy, struck me with interest and a playful smile lays on her lips. "Did you not understand my question?", she asked kindly, but nobly reserved. Immediately a rosy puff settled on my cheeks and I stuttered nervously: "Y-Yes, excuse me! I... I was just somewhere else with my thoughts and was completely surprised that they were addressing me personally.... Your works are truly unique! They still show such ‘usual’ motifs and yet they are so special because of these finely elaborated details and this passion with which this work of art was painted. They really are... Unique artworks that you do not forget so quickly. Even for untrained eyes as my owns, I can see that a talented artist has worked on it. I am very impressed by your work, especially this work here!" You could hear the honest admiration from my voice and my heart leapt as she reacted bashful to all of my compliments.

"Thank you, really, thank you so much! I really appreciate to hear such nice words like yours, even if it is rare. I am often criticized for my ‘lack of creativity’, caused by my chosen motives. I just love the rough, almost untouched landscapes of my hometown, I try to depict the ‘normal’ as something beautiful, unique. I would like to ‘really see’ what we already take for granted again. As a wonderful creation, a work of art. Nature is a wonderful example of this, or the architecture of buildings as well. Architects are also artists, although unfortunately they are not seen as such. I just want to offer the obvious things a more meaningful space again.... People like you have become rare. I have observed how you have recognized the true meaning, this beauty and aesthetics in such a ‘usual-looking’ motif. And this pleases me so much that you can read 'between the brushstrokes'. Oh... Excuse me, I always talk way too much when someone shows an interest in art or music, my personal passions. Besides that, I have not introduced myself to you yet, I am Y/N! I was obviously so pleased to see your understanding, empathetic look at this work, if you understand what I mean... Anyway... I can guess that you knew my name already, don't you? What about you? May I know your name?", asked you, beautiful artist, with her really stunning smile.

I swallowed nervously, never before had a young lady mixed my emotions so much in me. Even the picture of her in the newspaper article, which I had read out of boredom in one of my lectures, got me so emotionallyconfused. I didn't want to say it in front of my teasing friends, but I had been really excited when I set off this Friday night. And now the creator of these works of art stood before me and seemed to want to have a longer conversation with me. My heart beats to my throat and I got sweaty hands from this nervousness in my poor body. Honestly, as soon as I wasn't surrounded by my clique of friends, I automatically turned into a nervous, slightly abashed blushing and stuttering guy who behave like an inexperienced teenager.

In private life, without my best mates by the side, I am not so confident and daredevil. After all, I always had someone who could cover my back when things get tough, while I am on my own without anyone I know. You could usually only believe and trust, not control. That's probably why I struggled with interpersonal relationships. I always overthink too much and have some struggles with my self-confidence.

And now this attractive young woman looked at me with such interest and joy, just me. I was actually the reason for her interest. A joyful and blissful tingling seized every pore, every fiber of my body. Yes, in fact it was just me! Not my best buddy Seokjin, whom I have known since childhood and always sought the attention of everyone. It was no exaggeration to say that he was perhaps a little narcissistic, but only to cover up his own insecurities. Never would I have thought that someone would manage to get this personification of self-love under control. I admired his wife for standing up to Seokjin and keeping him and his dad Jokes at bay. Believe it or not, she of all people had the pants on in the house and knew how to deal with my best friend.

My gaze glided over the figure of the person in front of me and once again I took a sharp breath. I was so nervous to face her personally, a person I already deeply admired and had quite a respect for. I simply did not want to do anything wrong, even if this charm of hers was almost tangible and paralyzed my entire brain with its function. I can already picture how my mind waved wildly goodbye to myself and went to the summer holiday in the Caribbean.

This carefree smile and these beautiful eyes harmonized wonderfully with your complexion. Your features were awake and alive, seemingly always a slight smile surrounded the corners of your mouth, which provoked almost paradoxical reactions in my body. Your smile awake countless butterflies to flutter around in my stomach, which made me quite nervous and at the same time you radiated such a sense of security and calm, as if there was no reason not to get a word out of shyness. My gaze, which I hope examined you unobtrusively enough, wandered to your hands. You had long fingers, I could really imagine how they elegantly held the handle of the paint brushes and worked on these small details extensively in such a calm behavior. Which satisfied and concentrated calmness you possibly radiated while doing that...

A small, noble clearing of your throat again tore me out of my fantasies and speculations. God, what was I today but inattentive! How rude I must have seemed to you...

"Oh, sorry... I... I have not been able to keep my thoughts together all day..." I lied to seem at least a little more credible. Nervously, I pulled on the knot of my tie to loosen it up a little before I have a circulatory collapse. Before I went here, I thought for a long time about what I should wear for this occasion. Jeans and T-shirt were out of the question, too casual and almost an insult for your atelier. A complete suit, however, seemed too overdressed to me and so I decided for a black dress pants and a dark blue dress shirt.Understanding, Y/N nodded and gave me a cheering smile, which made my body tingle again. This woman drove me half crazy alone with his friendly gestures. How could it be that this polite lady got me confused right away?!

And somehow, it gave me a frenzy to leave my secure, anonymous side as a visitor to her exhibition and irrevocably reveal my true identity to you.

"My name is Jeon Jungkook."I answered in a slightly trembling voice, hardly daring to look into her eyes and rubbing my neck unobtrusively.

* Jungkook’s POV *

If only I had guessed what would change in me, how you changed me. That so much more would develop from a pure interest and a simple formal business contact... that you want to make me one of your artworks.

I take another deep breath before I dare to step out from behind the dark red paravent. It is pleasantly warm in this room, I should not freeze, if I am already so freely clothed. My gaze wanders through the small room with the huge, floor-to-ceiling window, which floods the entire room with light. The walls of the room have been painted in a dark orange and red colors and dark wooden planks lay out on the floor. It looks so comfortable due to the warm, dark tones. The orange-yellow evening sun dipped everything into something so cozy... sensual. Somehow into even a little erotic?

Y/N wants to work a lot with the light of the evening sun in this painting, which could be a little complicated if it is not suitable or if it is cloud-covered. But if you have put something into your head, especially in relation to your art, then you do everything you can do to go through it! Also the changing forces of nature cannot stop you from trying to realize your idea. Sometimes, you’re someone who is quickly frustrated and dissatisfied with yourself as well, especially when something doesn't work as you wants it to. Nevertheless when it comes to your passion, drawing and painting, you don’t let your idea go away, if you want something, you’ll find a way to make it happen. These are qualities that I know all too well of myself and thus my fascination about you only grows even more. The more time we spent together and I get to know more and more sides of you, the more attracted I became to you.

Your art means a lot to you and you’re quite tough in this respect, can not be overcome by the reproaches and the crushing criticism. That’s exactly what I admire so much about you, having the courage to stand up for personal passion. When I get criticized, all too often I think about really giving up on it, so that I don't have to endure all this criticism anymore. And then I look at you. How focused you are in this moment and carefully prepare for your next project. How you adjusts you easel to the right height, let your self-stretched canvas snap into place, spreads brushes of all sizes and shapes on the small side table next to you and prepares youracrylic colours. I swallow again, as I watched this happen. I am about to become one of your next artworks.

A little uncertainly I walk towards Y/N, the thin dressing gown tightly drawn around my body... never before have I felt so naked and vulnerable. This here is something else. I feel something about it... I feel something for you. For this pretty lady, who sprays her cheerfulness around her and could conjure a smile on the lips of even the most grumpy person. This joy almost kills you, completely engrossed this person and gives you the feeling of floating. You will get the feeling of being welcome at Y/N. To be accepted, with all the flaws and weaknesses that one has. She just smiles at you so gently and lovingly and just says, it's okay. It's okay to be the way you are. Imperfect.

"It is precisely this imperfect, this contradictory and also unpredictable thing that makes us human. That makes us an individual and also interesting. If we were really all as we are expected to be, it would be boring and monotonous. The surprise is only a real gift. Each of us is a very individual gift to a very specific addressee, who is the only one who can truly appreciate this gift. Only then did the recipient find the right person as his gift... Well, if the recipient knows about his gift...", Y/N once said with such a certain look at me, when we went out to dinner together in a restaurant in the evening to clarify some details. I wanted to help her find good contacts in Seoul and help her sell her works.

I can still remember it exactly... it was a quite... extraordinary evening. I was of course once again incredibly nervous and excited. At that time, I did not want to fully realize how much I already like you. Secretly, I had observed my opposite. Your positive and friendly disposition had turned my head all around... and in addition, this beautiful body and her elegant fingers, which already haunt me in the most erotic way unintentionally in my dreams.

I could not prevent my dream pictures from shooting through my head, which is why my cheeks turned dark red in embarrassment. These fucking fantasies in my head! My eyes stare at the cutlery as if it were incredibly interesting because I didn't dare look up. There were scenes in my mind that made my ears turn red and I would’ve loved to hide behind the menu card. Your body, which made her look like a Greek goddess.

Naked, body covered in sweat, your body shook in lust, you sit up with a wonderful moan... You are on top of me, I could admire your beautiful, almost divine body as you sat on top of me... and rode me. This breathtakingly beautiful distorted face of yours, as if all this pleasure you feel is carved in marble... lids closed, your lips, swollen from all the kissing, are slightly opened which let your lustful whimpering escape. This grace and elegance, as you rose from me and then lowered yourself again... as your hands glide erratically over my stomach, searching for support... you suddenly threw your head back and clenched even more tightly around my length. The addicting sounds you’ve made... it’s like the most beautiful melody in my ears... squelching noises and even more of yourjuices gushing out of your sweet, so sweet pussy when you came...

An all-too-familiar laugh tore me out of my extremely indecent thoughts, which quite relieved me at first. Until I raised my head and not too far away I recognized no one but my best friend Kim Seokjin, who made very questionable hand signals in my direction. Oh my God, no! I knew that he had recently changed his job and got accepted for a position as a chef in a new restaurant... but not in this Restaurant! He will never let me life after he found out I was on a “Date” with a woman...

Even though Seokjin was on the other side of the restaurant, I could almost feel his smirk on my own skin. Fuck it, just pretend as if you do not know each other and hit him really hard tomorrow morning in the gym where we meet up for our work out. I quickly turned all my attention back to the person sitting opposite me and tried to ignore Seokjin as best I could.

It was only at the end of the evening, when I had said goodbye to Y/N, that I realized that this meeting had much more of a date than a "business dinner". How familiar we had talked with each other... how much I had thought about licking Y/N the drop from the chocolate sauce of her lava cake from her lips... how it would be... to kiss and touch you...

A noticeable blush has settled on my cheeks as I attended our first meeting together... or even Date in this Restaurant thought back. Four months had passed since then and I suffered from longing for you. You would never see me like I saw you. The reason you wanted to draw me was simply that she needed someone as a model. In addition to landscapes and cities, you want to devote herself gradually to more other motifs. And since I have been the first inquired. Your pleading eyes made me say yes. But I know that for me you have no more than the feelings for a casual friendship. It hurts to see how you flirt around so casually with all those other people. I would never be the gift for you as you are for me. If only the recipient would notice that there is a given heart laying in your hands...

"Ah, Jungkook! I’m glad that you're ready!", your cheerful and melodic voice cuts through the silence of the room and you’re walking towards me with excited shining eyes. "Come~," you say and lead me to the chaiselongue, which is placed in front of the large window. The soft, orange light of the evening sun falls on the wine-red fabric of the restored chaiselounge in baroque style. The upholstery has frames covered in gold and also the lion feet on which this historic furniture stands are gilded. Everything was decorated with so many Details, it looks so incredibly elegant and luxurious. On the left side there are some cushions in the same color and an elegant design is carved on the backrest, literally inviting to get used.

"Surely you know the movie 'Titanic', right? Do you remember the scene where Jack used charcoal pencils to draw an nude coal picture of Rose as she laid on the sofa? I would like to draw you in a similar position. I hope it's okay for you if I look at you more closely without a dressing gown... i want to get an overview of your body proportions.", you say, looking me straight in the eye. I notice that you’re very concerned about my privacy and does not want to overstep any of my personal boundaries without my consent. I nod slightly at first until I get a clear yes over my lips. She looks at me silently for a few seconds before reassuring me once again that we can always stop at any time if I feel uncomfortable. Especially your patience and mindfulness of my boundaries shows me how important it is for you as well and how I actually relax noticeably. Y/N smiles cheerfully at me and I slowly loosen the belt of the dressing gown and let the last garment slide to the ground. I feel her in-depth look at me... he is not uncomfortable... only... exciting... in a few different ways.

I swallow again and lie down on the chaiselongue as instructed. You correct my arm and leg position, also rearrange all of the cushions correctly. To my own relief, you put a red cloth over my crotch area. Not that I am ashamed of anything, I am more than comfortable with you already... I just have some worries that I will get a visible problem if I constantly feel your look on my bare skin.

"It should be able to guess something, but not be allowed to see everything right away...", she whispered with a smile, before her fingertips unintentionally glide tenderly through my happy trail. One of your last smiles are... not really to interpret. Then you return to your easel.

* The Reader’s POV *

Carefully you sit down on your old painting stool, already quite worn out on the edges and stained with the most different types and tones of colors. It had originally been dark brown. You smile dreamily when you think back that you’re used to dangle your legs around when you were a little kid because it was way too big for you back then. For eighteen years now you have exactly this stool and this easel. They had been a gift from your grandfather for your fifth birthday. He had awakened the passion of painting and drawing in you and passed his talent on to you. A certain melancholy seized you when I thought back to how you used to paint your first real picture on canvas with your new easel in the old music room in your grandfather's country house.

It had been the old, dusty grand piano, which must have been more than a hundred years old at that time. How the country house survived all these wars unscathed, you ask yourself to this day. Perhaps there had already been something magical about it at that time, which should remain untouched. Perhaps the small estate should remain an inconspicuous symbol of hope, the hope that at some point the sun and peace will return when the unbearable suffering and sorrow of this cruel time is over. When the wars were over and all those seeking protection who had fled to this country house were able to return to their own homes again. This house, this estate you can explain your childhood with a single word. Home.

You lift your thought-lost look from your empty, folded hands and look to Jungkook. He takes your breath away every time you see him. He is so special, such a wonderful and yet you firmly believe that he has not been chosen for you, such an ordinary woman as you are. He would belong to someone else with whom he would be happy, although he is the only one who was able to understand and read your works, the language in them. It... it had been such a beautiful moment when, six months ago, he stood in your newly opened studio, so absorbed by the painting of the forest of your childhood. All the other visitors had only looked at it briefly and smiled wearily at the fact that it was again only a landscape painting, but did not grasp what the story behind this work was. Why the artist chosed this very motif, to see, to feel what the creator wanted to communicate through the work.

But Jungkook had been different. He had given the work, your personal heart, a chance to unravel the true meaning behind it. He did it slowly, bit by bit with his eyes... grasped with his whole mind and heart and finally let himself be influenced as a whole. You could tell from his body reactions that he felt exactly what you had felt when you painted it last summer. Longing. Infinite Longing. Mixed together with melancholy, a little homesickness and sorrow to a unique emotional color. The day you painted it was the last time you saw the house in your official possession. Your grandfather had left it to you. But unfortunately you lacked money, you had to pay some debts and with the best will you could not earn the money in other ways. So you had to sell it with a heavy heart. Your beloved birth and childhood home and the associated lands, you had to sell your true home away. The picture is the only thing left of it. And Jungkook was the only person who understood what you wanted to express with the painting. Longing. My Homesickness.

When all these sensations came upon him, he involuntarily clenched his hands tightly, his chest lifted and lowered quickly, his Adam's apple hopped repeatedly. His eyes were glassy. He experienced your longing as directly as you did. He... is so special. So infinitely amiable. He... he is the only person who’s able to read your true feelings in your works. He is able to read between your brush strokes.

So today you will try him... to paint a confession of love with this act. Maybe he could read... what you feel for him. Even if you know that you will probably never see him again. Because you would not be the recipient of his love and affection. He's just too... too... gifted for a simple artist like you. He would never be your gifted person.

Your gaze glides tenderly and caressingly over his body. Trying to absorb every little detail of his body, his charisma and his character into you and let it flow into the painting. Every birthmark you want to put on the canvas and hold on. You want to show Jungkook how beautiful he is. How godlike he lies before you on this majestic chaiselongue, how masculine and muscular he is, as if he wanted to embody an Adonis. You want to paint every muscle, even the smallest visible muscle, on the canvas in a realistic manner, you want to capture the strength and security that he conveys to you over and over again and make it visible to him. And yet... his gaze often corresponds to that of an intimidated, insecure fawn, which does not dare to want to get up on his legs on his own. The fear of falling again is too big. Through this painting you want to show Jungkook what he really is, what he represents for you and what you feel for him. He is... so contradictory. He is strong, godlike, powerful... and at the same time, so infinitely uncertain, vulnerable... almost pure.

Silence enters your little studio, only the regular breathing of the other and the muffled noise of the busy world outside the door could be heard. Here... here, it feels like time is standing still for a moment for the two of you. Your shared eternity had begun.

To your happiness that it is summer right now and it stays bright for a long time. Today you take more time than usual to mix colors. You want to mix a shade that perfectly matches his skin tone. You want to get the exact color of his black hair down onto the canvas, and the perfect brown for his beautiful eyes. The evening sun and the leaves of the huge treetops in front of the large window conjure up the most beautiful patterns on his immaculate body. A game of light and shadow. It seems to you that Jungkook's body, every single pore of his body has a tiny diamond, so that he begins to sparkle in the sunlight like an infinitely precious jewel. The evening sun warms him, lays a thin layer of sweat over his body. Every detail you try to bring to the canvas, every feeling, every movement of my heart, everything you feel for him, you want to bring to this canvas. You want to make him a masterpiece. Because for you, he is the most beautiful specimen, the only true crown of the human creation.

Some black strands have come loose from his manbun and have fallen on his forehead. It looks stunning, to see him like that. I had never seen him with a messy or even completely open hair... but even now these strands loosened from the braid make his facial features look so much softer and more relaxed. In it, the adult and strong man united with a young, vulnerable, shy boy. The result is... infinitely beautiful. He possesses both sides, so he makes the seemingly inexhaustible divine human being.

His eyes, drawing his eyes with that expression in them, cost you a lot of nerves. Too often you misunderstood this infinite longing that you find in his dark, brown eyes. Again and again you have to restrain yourself, not just to get up, to go over to him... and to kiss him.

This longing look you misinterpret is as longing as you own... according to your closeness, your touch, your affection... according to your love. Because you love him. You love everything about him, his sheepish laugh, the way of rubbing his neck shyly, the way he speaks and explains his point of views about things, how he smells... just everything... every blemish he blames on himself, you think it’s like an artwork on him. He is so perfectly imperfect that you just fell in love with him.

The sun has already set and only the last pink and purple streaks could be seen in the sky, with which the past day says goodbye to the world. One last time you can hear the velvety stroke of the brush over the canvas before you finally put the brush aside. It is finished. You have given everything that is in your power, used all of your artistic abilities and knowledge to the utmost and you have incorporated everything that you feel and think about into this artwork. And what you see put a smile on your lips, but also makes your pulse rise. What will Jungkook say when he looks at it? He will see it... can he read what you feel for him in it?

With a trembling voice, you call Jungkook and look at him one last time. The last time the sight of this male beauty was granted to you. One last time.

After Jungkook has wrapped himself in the dressing gown again, he slowly comes towards you and your easel. Your heart is throbbing as if it really wants to fearfully flight and jump out of your chest. Your body gets hot and cold at the same time and suddenly your hands get sweaty, the dried color on your skin mixes with the sweat to a uncomfortable mess in your palms, which somehow makes you even more nervous. Then he stands next to you. Looking at the canvas for the first time himself. The last brushstroke is still drying.

Once again there is silence, which makes you incredibly nervous and with every second that passes, you want to follow your instinct to escape. Jungkook's pupils are dilated and blown out, whether with bewilderment or horror, you can not recognize. One of his hands shoots up his mouth, he trembles all over his body. Suddenly you hear a suppressed, throaty sobbing. Surprised and a little appalled, you look at Jungkook, who has shut his eyes tightly and presses the palm of his hand even harder on his mouth, as if he wants to muffle every sound. Tears escape the corners of his eyes. This is a reaction... which you would not have expected...

Gently, mindful of any kind of resistance, you wrap your arms around his neck and hold him. He doesn't say anything, he doesn't sob, he doesn't whimper. He just cries. Tenderly, consolingly you hold him, without wanting to distress him. He literally presses his face into the crook of your neck. Salty tears drench your blouse, but it doesn't bother you. The reason why he had such an emotional outburst, you just don't understand. But still... it's okay. It is valid.

As he slowly calms down and his breathes becomes regularly again, he carefully lifts his head out of the crook of your neck and wipes the last tears out of his eyes dry in slight embarrassment. He slowly releases himself from your embrace until you finally stand silently in front of each other.

"What title you’ll give this artwork?", he asks softly, in a rough, throaty voice. You swallow . "It shall be called 'Der Geliebte'. ...it is german and translated it means... ‘The beloved’ ", you say barely audibly and lower your head. After this confession, you can no longer look him in the eyes.

Jungkook takes a sharp breath in and you're actually just waiting for a devastating response from him that would be like a death threat. But nothing of this happened. Instead, your chin is suddenly raised by his fingertips and you look into Jungkook's beautiful eyes. He bites his lower lip a little uncertainly,his own gaze falls on your pretty shaped lips.

"Do you... do you allow me to kiss you?", he asks quietly... barely audible for you even though you’re standing so close to each other. He doesn't dare to look you into the eyes after such a question, he is too afraid that you deny his request. But you can hardly believe your luck, a high pitched ‘yes!’ flew over your lips and before you can control yourself, you press your own lips right onto his. They are incredibly soft and kiss you back in such a delightfully and endearing insecure and shy manner as no other could ever have done it.

Your heart beats full of joy and bliss and in your belly, the butterflies fly somersaults of all different kinds that your whole body began to tingle. Your mind cannot get a grasp of all this yet, but this... you don't need any more of it at this moment anyway.

The kiss is tender, shy and somewhat uncertain from both sides. Jungkook is very insecure and shy, but before he can escape like a frightened deer again, you put your arms around his neck and let your hands rest in the nape of his scalp. Again and again you detach yourselves from each other only for the fraction of a second to get a breath of air into your lungs in order to find each other lips again... until you stopped for a few seconds.

"I like you... I like you really, really much, Jungkook... I even dare to say that I fell on love with you.", you mutter softly against his lips. His shy, happy smile was too much for you, so you immediately kiss him again. Perhaps because of the sheer joy and maybe of the certainty that he feels the same for you, the next kiss turns into something more passionate than before...

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