#And I.. (how people can draw fast) still slow at drawing

[lovelyladyabsinthewrites]

Hi please can u write Edward Cullen x sick reader. Where the reader is stubborn and still shows up at school despite being sick. (I’m sick rn and can’t find any Edward fics) hope u have a nice day

Thank u :))

Nurse

Warnings: none really, sick!reader, potentially getting other people sick 😅, stubborn!reader, firm and patient edward, thank you for the request btw and sorry it took so long for me to get to it ❤️

Words: 1307

Edward knew immediately when you sat in the front passenger seat of his car that you were sick.

His brows draw heavy with concern. "You're-"

"I'm fine." You croak and buckle up. Moreso lying to yourself than to Edward. Your head felt like it was stuffed with cotton and you were pretty sure a small fever was beginning to rise on your forehead. Like hell you were missing school that day. You'd studied day and night for your test; was finally confident that you were going to pass.

Reading your thoughts, Edward sighs and leans back into his seat. "(y/n), a test doesn't matter when your health is in question. Your teacher will let you take a makeup test. You need to go back to bed."

There was no energy in you to roll your eyes. "After I take my test then I can rest. I just want to get it over and done with."

"You won't do well if you're si-"

"Edward, please. I know my body. I can survive until second period." Arguing did nothing to help you feel better.

He could just grab you and take you back to your room. Doing that would further enrage you.

"You promise to let me take you home after second period?" The pleading in his voice softens you.

"I promise."

Exhaulting another sigh, Edward nods to himself. "Alright. I'm holding you to that."

A part of you doubts that you'll be able to make it to second period, but you would try to.

Edward may not have fought you more, that didn't mean he was pleased watching you struggle that morning. You were bumping into other students and walls as you lost your balance several times.

Alice pulled Edward aside, her honey eyes narrowed. "Why would you let her come to school like that? She's obviously sick, Ed!"

"I know. Believe me I tried. She promised to let me take her home after her test in second period." Edward lowers his voice, he doubts you can hear him. His gaze is on you as Jasper helps to steady you.

"I don't think she'll make it." Alice frowns and folds her arms in front of her chest. "I don't have to look into the future to see that."

"You try telling her then. See how easy it is."

She wouldn't even try, having experienced your stubborness before. You always wanted to appear tough to the Cullen family as you were selfconcious of being the only human among them. Compared to them you were weak. You compensated by doing whatever you could as a human to appear strong. Including refusing help when you were sick. Edward knew it would wound your pride greatly if he forced you home. So did Alice.

You didn't share first or second period with Edward. He kept tags on you via his mind reading to see how you were faring.

Struggling to stay up in your chair, your eyes were fighting every second to remain focused on the whiteboard at the front of the class. You don't remember much of what the teacher was talking about. Conserving your energy and mentally going over things for your test the following period. You were fading fast. Chugging water helped a little.

When the bell rang, finally alerting of the end of the first period, you were slow to get to your feet. If you tried to move any faster than your current pace, the world would slip from under you.

You use desks to coast your way to the classroom door. Barely making it to the door, there appears Edward. Frazzled when he takes in your flushed face.

Before he could object to you continuing the school day, you stop him by placing a hand on his chest. His mouth closes as he quietly surrenders.

Help me to my next class. Please. You ask him via your thoughts. Doubting you could talk without feeling vomit rise up your throat.

Edward breathes through his nose but doesn't complain about you overworking yourself when you needed rest.

Ever the gentleman, Edward cups your elbow and guides you.

"The moment the class ends, I'm taking you home." He whispers to you as he helps you through the scattering of students running late.

You'd smile if you could. I love you.

You catch the quirk in the corner of his lips and the brightening of his eyes.

It cost you the rest of your strength, but you did it. You fucking did it. All questions answered to the best extent of your knowledge.

There were few steps that were between you and the teacher's desk.

You suck in a breath and stand, hand gripping the edge of your desk for support. Navigating through rows of kids bent over their paper's, you focus ahead of you.

When your teacher notices you, she pauses at the waxen sheen of your face. The moment your test is on the surface of her desk you quietly croak "Can I go to the nurse's office?"

Edward was right outside the door, prepared to take you into his arms. You wanted to laugh.

The thought of a mother hen pops into your mind, making Edward scoff. "If I'm a mother hen so be it." You were unable to protest when he easily scoops you up and dashes to his car. Alice is waiting, rocking back and forth on her feet until she spots the two of you. There's a plastic bag in her hand that looks overly full.

"I'll tell the office." Alice takes Ed's car keys to opening the passenger door for you. Then she places the grocery bag in the back seat. "I googled what made people feel better when they're sick."

"Thank you Alice." You manage to get out as Edward opens the door with just one finger. He sets you down and straps the belt across your chest but not before tossing your backpack into the back seat.

Wondering what Alice had bought you, your forehead presses against the passenger side window, you momentarily fall asleep.

Only waking up when Edward is carefully picking you up from the car's passenger side. He's so careful with you. Always.

You realize when he opens the door that he's brought you to the Cullen house when the front door doesn't match your's.

"I don't want to leave you sick and home alone." He explained while hurrying up the stairs.

And. . .

"Ed. . ." Are you scared?

His jaw clenches. In his room he makes sure you're comfortable with whatever you needed. Water. Pillows. Blankets if you got cold.

Then he settles next to you. His face unreadable. You curl up closer to him and just that mere contact melted him.

"My mother and I. . . we were very sick when I became a vampire." This was something he'd told you a while ago. They'd become sick during the Spanish influenza outbreak. "I know the medical world is much more evolved than it was during my time, but it still terrifies me when you get sick."

"Oh Ed," You sit up even when Edward urges you to lay back down. "I should have-"

He furiously shakes his head. "No. You didn't do anything wrong. Sickness just reminds me how human and fragile you are." Rolling onto his side, you copy him. Head comfortably cradled by a pillow.

Rest.

You could finally rest.

His fingers brush along your brow, soothing your warm skin. You shimmy closer against him. Edward's much larger frame conforms around you.

"I know you won't die from this. Not that I'd let you die from illness." Adding the last part a bit under his breath, you still caught it.

For a second, Edward pulls away from you to retrieve a bottle of medicine from the bag.

"Now be a good girl and take your medicine."

[aaslwooo]

I've heard a lot about Suna as Middle Eastern headcanons, but I don't want to ignore the Japanese aspects they've put in.

Like Temari has a fan & wears kimono (traditional fashion) most stylish out of the sibs, Kankuro's design based on kabuki & bunraku (stage play / entertainment) which is fit his personality, Gaara has that kanji & tanuki beast (literature & folklore) he's a nerd paperwork.

Right, Konoha has that nine-tailed fox inspired by old folklore too.. But can we talk about Suna? It has a monk called "Bunpuku" and he's a jinchuuriki of Shukaku, a tanuki. Also, Shukaku was sealed inside a tea kettle. ("Bunbuku Chagama" folktale reference)

And I've ever mentioned the comparison between the three siblings of the sand and the three kami (which is also siblings) in one of my post's tags

Does it remind you of when Yashamaru said something like "your mom gave birth to you to kill " ??

Also, look at that cover

I'm unsure what old ruin is that, but I think it must have it's own story.. I think Sunagakure has its own depth and history that I wish I could dig in (not talking about the politics).

However, I also think Middle East culture suits well to people who lives in desert areas (*I KNOW desert area is not only in middle east, I want to relate this with that hc). Like that cloak, its building architecture (e.g. they use thick stone for buildings not wood & arches, domes), and most importantly CULINARY (definitely not/less raw fish/rice/seafood etc.). It would be nice if Suna has a mix of Middle East and Japanese.

So, YES PLEASE,

ACCULTURATION BETWEEN MIDDLE EAST + JAPANESE ✨ I wonder how it turns out..

[llycaons]

I love content of wwx being smitten...just very in love and goofy about it and sappy and tender in ways he hasnt been allowed to be in canon. I would like to see more of it but I refuse to leave my circle so it comes inconsistently or not at all

[kitasgloves]

comforting your insecure bf

part 1 . part 3

— ♬ NSFW, MINORS DNI, gn reader, based on this post

— ♬ Tendou Satori

Growing up, Tendou Satori didn't have anyone to rely on until he reached high school where he met his teammates on the volleyball team and his best friend Ushijima Wakatoshi. Having experienced bullying in middle school, he created doubts he'll find someone who will love him.

Until he graduates college and moves to France, Tendou becomes a profound chocolatier and sells his chocolates in Paris. It seemed fate had planned it when you walked into his shop and purchased a box of his famous sweets. The way you smiled at him was sweeter than any chocolate Tendou has tasted. He was too stunned to even ask for your name before you walked out of his shop. Tendou had a serious sweet tooth because he was craving for your smile.

Fate has heeded his longing because you returned to his shop again with that sweet smile of yours, by then Tendou dared to ask for your name. Your visits have become frequent, on the third visit he makes you smile, the fourth he makes you laugh, on the fifth he asks for your number, and on the sixth you ask him out on a date.

It appeared so ideal, falling in love with a sweet chocolatier in Paris. Tendou stole your heart with his precious humor and his earnest feelings. Everything looked perfect the moment you and the chocolatier became a couple. Tendou thought he was contented, letting you move in with him. But then he believed everything was moving too fast, you two went beyond kissing and before he knew it he was overwhelmed.

However, he doesn't have the heart to tell you. He's afraid that if he did, you'd give him some space and he doesn't want that. He doesn't want you to be out of his reach, he doesn't want you to leave him. Because Tendou believes he'll never find someone who'll love a weirdo like him. He's already skeptical if you're genuinely in love with him. Even as an adult, he's still bothered by the looks people give him when he's with you. He knows what they're thinking.

What is a weirdo like him doing with someone beautiful like you?

"Satori? Are okay, chérie?"

Tendou blinks and awkwardly smiles at you while nodding. His eyes returned to the television screen but his mind was elsewhere. And you can tell, for the past few days, Tendou has been acting out of his character. He stopped telling you jokes and making chocolates with you. Something was bothering him. Wordlessly, you took his hand and pulled him up from the couch. There was no protest when you took him to your shared bedroom. The two of you settled on the bed.

"Darling, I know something is bothering you and I want you to be honest with me"

"I'm sorry, I'm just feeling a little bit unwell"

"Satori..."

Tendou sighs at your warning tone. You gently took his larger hands, sharing your warmth. He can feel his eyes grow wet.

"[Name]...why the hell did you fall in love with me?"

You blinked, there was a shake of your head and a lighthearted smile on your face. You know how bizarre Tendou can behave, which makes him unique. His red buzzcut and quirky smile captured your heart. You didn't give a shit if everybody else found him weird, to you he's the most perfect man you know.

"Do you want me to show you, Satori?"

Tendou wouldn't have imagined this scenario. You settle behind him, your hand fisting his cock as he is forced to watch everything through the bedroom mirror. It didn't help that the mirror was huge and he could see every explicit detail. The precum leaking out of the slit of his dick, a red flush all over his face, and your soft hand pumping his length to draw moans out of his lips

"Ah! Chérie! Please slow down!"

You only smiled sweetly at him and continued jerking him off, he threw his head back with a strangled moan.

"Eyes on the mirror, darling"

Tendou obeys with his head spinning in pleasure. He can hear his heart palpitating wildly in his ears as you pull him apart with each stroke of your hand.

"You asked me why I fell in love with you. How could I not when you're such an adorable, funny, and caring man?"

"How could I not swoon at every chocolate you make and gift for me? For every kiss we shared under the Paris lights? And the way you swept me off my feet and took me to bed after one month of being together?"

Your pace on his cock went slower, you wanted him to hear every word you said. Tendou can feel his breath going shallow at every sentence.

"I don't care what people think of us and neither should you. As long as I'm happy with you, to hell with what they think"

"[Name] I-"

"Oh Satori, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to get married and start a family"

Suddenly, your hand wandered to his balls as you played with them. Tendou's moans echoed in the room as the pleasure went crashing in. His eyes watch you through the mirror as he feels his release building up.

"Oh fuck, [Name], please!"

"Do you want that too, darling?"

"Yes! Fuck yes! Shit, I'm gonna cum!"

"Yeah? Go on, cum for me, Satori"

His hands grip the bedsheets as his hips bucked upward on your fist as he cums. You continue to pump him, letting the cum shoot out and leak on your hand. Tendou hisses as his eyes watered at the overstimulation. You kiss his neck tenderly after his orgasm. He was catching his breath when he looked at his messy reflection, he chuckled to himself. Suddenly, you pressed your lips against his ear.

"The next time you cum, it's going to be inside of me"

Tendou gulps as a bashful blush covered his cheeks. You smile sweetly at him as if you didn't whisper the nastiest shit he has ever heard against his ear.

— ♬ Hirugami Sachiro

Your first encounter with Hirugami Sachiro was when you took your dog to the vet for a check-up. You recently moved into the area and it was your first time visiting a new vet. Hirugami could've sworn Cupid pulled one of the stupid golden arrows and shot him in the back when you both locked eyes for the first time. You were gorgeous and you had an adorable dog too.

He treated your dog with utmost care and you couldn't even be happier. Since then, you started getting monthly checkups for your dog. Hirugami always looked forward to each of your arrivals, and each time he could feel himself slowly falling hard for you. At every check-up, you get to know the veterinarian more. You knew how he used to play volleyball, how he's the youngest of his siblings, his pro-volleyball best friend Hoshiumi Korai, and even his sweet dog named Kotarou.

Before you two knew it, you both grew closer and closer at each encounter. It was a matter of time before one of you would profess your feelings first. And it was Hirugami. He asked you to hang out outside of the vet to grab lunch and he confesses. He was expecting a rejection from you but you surprise him by returning his feelings.

It was only natural for you and Hirugami to become a couple. It was the happiest both of you have been in your lives. You kiss on sidewalks, have romantic dinners, and take your dogs together at the dog park. Everything felt perfect. But suddenly, you got busy with your work.

You were so busy that you had to take your dog to your cousin's to take of them for you because you didn't have time to do it. Hirugami pretended that it barely stung when you talked less and less with him. You both stopped seeing each other every day. There wasn't any bitterness rising it was just dead silence. Hirugami figured he should focus on his profession as a veterinarian. The both of you wouldn't have proper contact for weeks to the point Hirugami becomes concerned.

He didn't understand why you were busy all of a sudden, to him, it's like you barely made an effort to check on him. He felt pathetic desperately reaching out for you until he began doubting himself. What if you grew tired of him? What if you started seeing somebody else? His thoughts frightened him. Hirugami wanted to be the perfect boyfriend for you. Before he realizes it, he's falling back to his bad habits back in high school.

Hiruguami used to be a perfectionist during volleyball, he'd blame himself for every mistake he made. He mindlessly scrapped his knuckles against a stone surface to the point that it bled. And he was doing it again, although less harshly. When you finally had the time to see him, you immediately asked to go over to his place.

When you saw your boyfriend your heart dropped, he looked like he was barely taking care of himself. There were dark bags under his eyes, he seemed paler, and bandages on his knuckles.

"What happened to you, Sachiro?"

You asked him, visibly concerned. It made Hirugami guilty. You two catch up during dinner and he finally tells you what is going on with him. You can feel your heart shatter.

"I thought I was never going to be the perfect boyfriend for you, [Name]"

"Is that why you began scraping your knuckles?"

"I'm sorry..."

"Hey, don't be. I should be the one apologizing for not trying to reach out"

"But you were busy, and I understand that-"

"Sachiro, that's still not an excuse to suddenly cut contact with you"

"But I should've done better, you know? I could've"

"Sachiro"

You firmly stopped him. Hirugami bites his lip and looks at you like a scolded child. You sighed as you went over to take his hands and kiss his bandaged knuckles. He was facing away and it seemed like he wasn't getting the message you're trying to get across. Then, you thought of an interesting way to do it.

"[Name], shit!"

Hirugami gritted his teeth as he observed you stroking his cock in front of his bedroom mirror. Everything happened so fast, one moment you were fervently kissing him and the next you were behind him giving him a handjob.

"I missed you, Sachiro"

You purred from behind as you gently pumped his cock. No matter how much he tried to resist, Hirugami couldn't peel his eyes away from the mirror. His pants were clumsily pulled down, sweat dripping down his neck, and his face completely flushed. He was so mesmerized with your hand stroking his length.

"I'm sorry for making you feel bad, baby"

"You deserve to be treated better because you're so sweet, nice, and handsome"

Hirugami's mouth falls open as a moan escapes his mouth. His eyes shut when the pleasure overtakes his body when you suddenly grab his chin.

"Keep your eyes on the mirror for me please?"

You requested and who was he to deny you? You jerked him off at a pleasurable pace as he watched himself melt in your presence.

"You're the best boyfriend in the world, Sachiro. I'm not letting you think otherwise"

"You're so hot, passionate about your job, and the best at making me cum every time we fuck"

Hirugami lets out a low groan when you reach for his sack as you start to massage it. Every thought of insecurity vanishes in his head as he focuses on you as you drive him lightheaded.

"[Name], fuck! I wanna cum!"

"Not until you tell me that you're the best boyfriend in the world"

When you begin to tease his slit with your fingers, he grabs your thigh and glares at you through the mirror. The feral look in his eye made him look so attractive. He looks at you dead in the eye through the mirror as you physically shiver.

"I'm the best boyfriend in the world"

"Damn right you are, and don't you ever forget that"

With that, you viciously pumped his cock to the brink of orgasm. The pace was so overwhelming that Hirugami's eyes rolled back as the most earth-shattering orgasm hit him. He could've sworn he went to heaven and back. After his release, he sees through the mirror that his cum has stained his abdomen and your hand. His hair was a mess and he's covered in sweat all over.

"Feeling better now, Sachiro?"

"I am, thank you"

He smiles at you as you return the gesture. But then you begin to pull your shirt over your head as his eyes bulge out of their sockets, before he can say something, you possessively grab his shoulders.

"How about we make up for the time we lost, baby?"

— ♬ Miya Osamu

During the humble beginnings of his business at Onigiri Miya, you stumbled into Osamu Miya's life. Freshly graduated from college, you clumsily entered his shop hungry and prepared to devour anything available on the menu. You were done after a grueling job interview. Osamu was eager to feed you whatever was best on his menu.

"Oh my gosh, this is so delicious!"

You exclaimed as you pointed at the Onigiri he served to you, there was an adorable glimmer in your eyes that Osamu couldn't help but blush. He tries to cover it by tilting his hat downward to cover his face. Somehow you have successfully made his heart race by your smile alone. He learns how bright and friendly you were when you gave him your name, he eagerly spells out his. At that moment, he's convinced his life is about to take a drastic turn.

You visit Onigiri Miya daily, always talking to Osamu as you two gradually became close friends. He recently learned you got a job as PR in MSBY Black Jackals, and he freezes. There is no doubt that you have met his twin brother, Atsumu Miya. That bastard probably tried to flirt with you, maybe tease you or subtly make a suggestive remark. Osamu's chest grew tight.

Even if he and Atsumu shared the same face, people naturally flocked to his brother more. Despite his cocky attitude and unapologetic behavior, people overlooked the flaws Atsumu had because of his magnetic looks. After all, Atsumu genuinely makes an effort to look good. He learns how to bleach and properly style his hair, how to dress stylishly and make everyone swoon behind the cameras. Compared to all that, Osamu barely tried.

Osamu just pulls on whatever he finds in his wardrobe, no matter how horrible it looks. He only knows how to brush his hair (he stopped letting Atsumu dye his hair dark grey again). And he's awkward when there are cameras around. Osamu becomes convinced that he'll never have a shot with you.

"'Samu! Are you even listening?"

You placed your hands on your hips and raised a brow at him. Osamu snaps out of it and sends you a timid smile and a rub on the back of his neck. You huffed.

"Sorry, what did ya say, [Name]?"

"I said, do you want to go on a date with me?"

"What?"

Osamu's eyes grew wide and gazed at you with pure astonishment behind the counter. He points to himself as his jaw drops to the floor. You couldn't hold back a giggle.

"Ya want to go on a date? With me? Me?"

"Yes, you idiot"

"Holy shit"

Well, he wasn't expecting that. On that weekend, you and Osamu went all over the city, exploring and eating street food. You held his hand for the first time and he could've sworn his heart leaped out of his chest. He decided to grow some balls and ask you to be his. And your only response was a wide smile as you grabbed his cheeks to give him a long and sweet smooch on the lips.

"Oi, scrub! Ya got any beer here?"

Atsumu yelled inside the kitchen. Osamu was one step closer to horse kicking his brother in the face. You shook your head and went to tell Atsumu there were beers in the fridge. Tonight was supposed to be a date night but Atsumu decided to show up at his apartment unannounced and crash it. You seemed unbothered considering you deal with the blonde merely on a daily at your job, but Osamu was uncomfortable.

The three of you watched some Ghibli movies. You were wedged between the twins eating snacks and drinking beer. As the night went on, Osamu couldn't shake off the feeling that he was uninvited in his place. You were being loud with Atsumu, sharing jokes and trading insults. You were being too naturally close to his brother that it's making his body heavy.

"M'gonna go ta bed"

Osamu mumbled as the end credits played after the movie, you stopped talking with Atsumu and watched your boyfriend drag his feet to the bedroom. Osamu collapsed on his bed, burying his face against his pillow. He remembers the fight he had with Atsumu back in high school after he admitted that he was going to quit playing volleyball. Since then there has been a competition that who lives the happier life, and Osamu was beginning to think he was losing.

There was a knock on the door before you entered his bedroom, Osamu avoided your gaze and pretended that he had passed out. You poked his leg and called out for his name softly, enough to tug on his heartstrings. When he faces you, your features display worry.

"Are you okay?"

"M'fine, [Name]"

"Is it because of 'Tsumu?"

"No"

Osamu replied so quickly that it answered the lingering question in your head. You sighed as you tugged on his arm, pulling him upwards from the bed. You smiled as you fixed his messy hair, but he didn't meet your eyes.

"Are you jealous, 'Samu?"

"No"

His tone was sincere. You hummed as you went behind him to wrap your arms around him, Osamu gazed at you through his bedroom mirror placed in front of his bed. He sees the tender look you give him through the mirror that he caves in. He spills his rising insecurity and how he deeply compared himself to his twin brother. And you were baffled.

"Osamu you fucking idiot"

"Huh?"

"Do you think I'm gonna leave you for that pisshead setter?"

"I mean, he's better lookin'-"

"Don't tell me you're letting him win"

Osamu shuts his mouth, he remembers how he shared with you about his ongoing sibling competition with Atsumu. You shake your head as your hands trailed to his belt, unbuckling it. Osamu gulps and stares at his unlocked bedroom door.

"Ugh, those two better not be fucking"

Atsumu mumbled as he played another movie on the TV. Meanwhile, Osamu was trying his hardest not to let an obscene moan leave his mouth as you jerked him from behind. He wouldn't dare let Atsumu hear what was going on inside the bedroom, and he wouldn't dare let his brother win the competition.

"Ah! Hmm, fuck [Name]"

"Osamu Miya, you fucking moron. Do you believe Atsumu is better than you?"

Osamu only answered through hushed and choked moans. You pumped his length faster, watching as precum leaked out of the slit. You pressed your lips against his ear.

"You're such a fantastic boyfriend. You're a hardworking business owner, you make the best damn onigiri, and you're so fucking hot. So, why the fuck are you comparing yourself to him?"

Your hands trailed to his ballsack to massage it and Osamu throws his head back, biting his lip to hold back a whine. You forced his head forward to the mirror.

"Eyes on the mirror, babe"

"Hnngh, [Name], please"

"I'm in love with you Osamu Miya, and you only. You better tattoo that shit to your brain, sweetheart"

"Wanna cum, wanna cum so bad [Name]!"

"Really? Are you done comparing yourself to Atsumu?"

"Yes! Oh fuck, yes!"

"Good, go on, cum for me, Osamu"

You purred as you wrapped your delicate hands around his cock as you stroked him rapidly. Bringing him to his sweet release. There was no way his twin wouldn't have heard the moan he unleashed as he cums. His hips jerked forward as his seed stained his pants and your hand. His eyes roll back as he throws his head backward with his mouth ajar. All he could hear was the sound of his loud heartbeat. As he comes back to his senses, he sees you smiling at him through the mirror. He chuckles.

"Well aren't ya full of surprises"

You laugh. He turns to grab your cheek to lean down and tenderly kiss you. Osamu smiles like he has won the lottery, no, even better. He has someone who loves him for who he is.

"Thank you, [Name]"

"You're welcome, baby"

Osamu couldn't fight back the smug look on his face as the two of you rejoined Atsumu in the living room. Atsumu gives him a narrowed look.

'What the fuck are ya smilin' for?'

'I win'

'The fuck?'

— ♬ Sakusa Kiyoomi

Sakusa Kiyoomi was comfortable on his own. He learned how to be independent and never relied on anyone constantly. For the most part, he's a natural introvert. He did have friends. Well, it's all thanks to his cousin Komori Motoya forcing him to socialize or his job as a professional athlete who needed to get along with his teammates. Sakusa thinks that having a few sets of friends he's good to go. Until you had to ruin everything.

You were the cheerful manager of the MSBY Black Jackals. Something about your warm and welcoming demeanor made Sakusa's nose scrunch. The way you smiled and talked with everyone like you had known them for years, it was uncomfortable for him to watch. However, you didn't force any conversation with him. You only greeted him and smiled. Yeah, he appreciated that but he's still cautious about you.

Over time, Sakusa learns there's a certain depth to you. That you weren't just all smiles and laughter. You're a professional human being with an emotional intelligence beyond him. You're incredibly sympathetic and intelligent and he's impressed. You're observant of people's perceptions of others and emotions. No wonder, you didn't force yourself to him.

You gave him space and respected his excessive cleanliness. Sakusa decides you're good in his book. What changed everything was when he was unexpectedly stuck in a crowd. It was absolute hell, he got lost navigating the team during an event. On the brink of an anxiety attack, you showed up.

"Sakusa-senshu!"

You called out, concerned at the way he was hunched forward seemingly on the verge of losing consciousness. Sakusa can feel your pinkie finger linking with his, he regains his focus. He looks at you as you lead him out of the crowd by his pinkie finger only. Perhaps out of respect because he doesn't like anyone touching him.

"Are you okay, Sakusa-senshu?"

"Yes, thank you [Name]"

When you smiled at him, his chest grew tight. It felt different. It was as if his world grew clearer and he could suddenly breathe perfectly. On the way to meet up with the team, he grabs your shoulder.

"Kiyoomi"

"Hm?"

"Call me Kiyoomi"

The moment you earned the permission to call him by his first name, your relationship with him changed. The two of you grew closer in such a short amount of time. The team was calling the spiker out for favoritism because Sakusa treats you kinder compared to them. He talks to you the most during breaks, he shares snacks and hand sanitizers, and it went as far as letting you high-five him after a game in which everyone was enraged.

Sakusa had never met someone who had made him smile so hard that his cheeks hurt, someone who knew what made him laugh until there were tears in his eyes, and someone he wouldn't mind breaking his own rules for. Whenever he looks at you, Sakusa finds it hard to look away. And before he realizes, he's falling for you.

And he's fucking petrified. Sakusa wasn't entirely smart when it came to romance, he never planned to fall in love with you. So, he bottles it up inside of him for years and it becomes unbearable. He figured you weren't ready to have a relationship let alone with him. And that you wouldn't want him to be your boyfriend. He's strict, a jerk, and a clean freak. Aside from his handsome looks and his amazing athletic abilities, Sakusa wasn't interesting.

However, unexpectedly, when he learns you're about to quit being the manager of the team to pursue another career, Sakusa panics and spills his feelings for you. He tells you he's been in love with you for ages. He doesn't want to see you leave without telling you how he feels. Shockingly, you laughed and smiled at him as you told him that the feelings were mutual. At that moment, Sakusa was convinced he had found true happiness.

The two of you dated and became official for six months. There were ups and downs in the relationship but it worked. Sakusa learned how to balance his growing volleyball career with his time with you. And you were happy with your newly chosen career and without failing to make Sakusa fall for you even more.

Tonight, the team invited Sakusa and you to a local club to celebrate the recent win against the SCHWEDEIN Adlers. Sakusa was about to quickly decline until you immediately agreed. So, here he is, alone by the bartender, nursing his cup of alcohol while he watches you dance with his friends. He could join you if he didn't detest crowds and dancing.

You were in your element, having fun with Bokuto, Hinata, and Atsumu. The four of you were stuck in your own world lost in the music. Something foreign bloomed in Sakusa's chest. It squeezed his heart and yanked it violently. He shakily finishes his drink as he frowns and watches you forget about his existence on the dancefloor.

Sakusa imagined if he was more likable, he'd join you and the guys on the dancefloor. If he wasn't a fucking coward, he'd grab you and spin you around to the music. If he wasn't boring, he'd give you the time of your life partying in the club. Sakusa sniffs as he finds himself exiting the club and driving home, lost in his sea of insecure thoughts.

When he arrived home, he received multiple text messages and missed calls from you. God, he's such a fucking dick for leaving you there at the club. He calls to tell you he's sorry and that he's back home. You later arrived at his apartment and saw him slouching on his bed, frowning. You were sweaty and fresh out of the club but he lets you embrace him.

"Sorry, I felt...overwhelmed"

"It's okay Ki, I just got worried. Let's just stay here, I'll tell the guys we went home"

"You...you should head back to the club"

"What? Why?"

"You were enjoying yourself out there with them and I just...ruined it"

Sakusa looks away. You sighed as you grabbed his chin to gently peck him on the lips.

"No, you didn't ruin anything. I would ditch them in a heartbeat if you said you wanted to go home, y'know"

"[Name]..."

"Kiyoomi, you matter more to me than anything else, okay?"

"I just can't help but wish I was more...fun for you"

"What do you mean, Ki?"

Sakusa shrugs and you frown. You settled from behind him to give him a tight hug. He sees you do so in front of his large bedroom mirror.

"If only I didn't hate crowds or physical touch, I would've danced with you at the club"

"Ki, you know I don't mind that, right?"

"Maybe if I wasn't so...boring you would've been happier"

He mumbled, and you huffed. You didn't like how Sakusa was putting himself down because it was so unlike him. The Sakusa you knew was confident and had no ounce of self-doubt. If only you could prove to him he's so much more than that.

"Uh, why are you smirking at me like that, [Name]?"

Sakusa never predicted this circumstance at all. His pants pulled down to his thighs, his cock out and your pretty hand stroking his length. Sakusa watched with lidded eyes and low moans as you give him an erotic handjob from behind. He grips your thighs as he feels his heart bang against his ribcage.

"Oh fuck, [Name]!"

"You like that, pretty boy?"

You grin devilishly at him through the mirror and he just grows even harder. The way you pumped his cock makes his head spin deliriously.

"Look at you, Ki. You're so pretty and hot moaning like that"

"[Name] please"

He whimpers and it encourages you to jerk him off faster. Sakusa goes briefly crossed-eyed as he watches the pornographic scene in the mirror.

"You're the most kindest and amazing boyfriend in the world, Kiyoomi"

You told him softly. He groans when your hands reach to cup his balls, he can feel drool leaving the corner of his mouth.

"You're so good at volleyball and cleaning, plus you know how to cook! Oh, I just can't wait to marry you soon"

"You-oh fuck!-mean that?"

"Yes, darling. You're not boring, not to me, never"

"I-ah!-I'm glad"

You smile sweetly at him as you return to pumping his cock faster. Sakusa's breath hitched he released a loud moan. With your free hand, you grab his chin to make him watch himself fall apart right in front of the mirror. You bite his earlobe.

"Are you gonna cum, pretty boy?"

"Oh fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Yes!"

"Go ahead. Cum for me Kiyoomi"

As your words echoed inside his head, Sakusa hit his orgasm like no other. It felt as though his soul left his body as he shot his load all over your hand. His head was thrown back with his jaw slack. As he slowly descends back to his body, he feels the sweat all over his skin and his cock softening. You kiss him on the cheek and fix his curls out of his eyes.

"How are you feeling, Kiyoomi?"

"Fucking great"

You smile cheekily at him but he only gazes at you breathlessly with lidded eyes. He slowly turns to directly stare at you, he couldn't be more in love with you, he swears.

"Ki? Why are you staring at me like that-oh shit! Wait! Stop, you're going to tear my clothes!!!"

©kitasgloves (do not steal or copy)

[rkiveinmarvel]

anatomy of hands and sake - roronoa zoro. (18+) des. angst-fluff-smut, wano arc. zoro finally woke up after the fight with big mom and kaido--he missed you. porn with plot. clothed sex. make up sex. unprotected sex (practice safe sex ppl) marking and biting>; soft sex, established relationship. soft!dom zoro, people being inlove, aftercare!! nsfw

notes. my propaganda: soft!zoro is canon zoro-again this contains smut (minors dni, pls) zoro big cock energy, mentions of wounds and stitches. F! Reader

hello. i had this idea for a while and yeah, here it is. it's my first time writing smut so, bear with me--n e way he might be ooc here but zoro is zoro and iluvhim. hiyori is mention as well tho-no hate to hiyori-luv that girl--livelaughlovemarimo

w.c: 3k (damn, zoro)

The infamous swordsman of the Straw Hat is known for his ability to stand his ground in any battle and situation, with one foot in front of him–he doesn’t hesitate to draw his sword if someone pisses off the crew. Saints forbid those who pissed off the swordsman because he will show no mercy and no hesitation, until it’s the captain’s orders—and an order from you.

            It’s no secret that you and the straw hats were once against each other in the fight at skypiea but that fight is the fight Zoro hesitated to hold his sword—maybe because he’s finally facing a right hand of the so-called god or maybe you were fighting against your will or maybe—just maybe—he didn’t want to hurt you. He still remembers how you gripped your sword with such anger and shouting at them to leave the island to protect themselves—call it a warning or a sign but at that moment, Zoro wanted to save you; he was glad he did.

            That was two years ago and here you are now waiting Zoro to wake up from his slumber after fighting Kaido and Big Mom. You reached for the damp towel as you wiped his worn-out body and slow heaving chest—Zoro looked peaceful when he sleeps, he always does, but moments like this you wish you can just see him working out at the crow’s nest, hear him argue with the cook, look out for Chopper, or just seat and listen to you.

            This is what you hate the most every time a battle ended, the silence of waiting, hoping, and wishing that all of the crew members are okay—the unwanted fast paced heartbeat as you wished for them to be okay. You sighed deeply as you caressed Zoro’s face and continue to wipe his cheeks and dance your fingertips in his hair.

            “Please, wake up…” You whispered lowly as you stare at this sleeping state and replace his old bandages with new ones. Once you finished cleaning him up—a small smile left your lips as you kissed his forehead. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

            Morning after morning, the green-haired swordsman and the future king of the pirates are still asleep—with no luck, you decided to spend the night looking out for the two; which Chopper didn’t agree at first, but as Chopper felt the tiredness catching up in his body—he agreed.

            Then, it was a week: a week of looking out for the two whilst also switching watching duties with the straw hat; but most of the time: you stayed there not wanting to switch with Sanji nor Nami as you hold Zoro’s hand muttering and wishing that he should wake up.

--

            Usopp rushes in the hallway and knocked on the room where you stayed—with a loud voice he announced that Zoro and Luffy are awake. You two immediately rush into the room—your pounding heartbeat and the ringing in your ear didn’t stop you—he’s awake, Zoro is awake—you kept on repeating on your head—the two of them are alive and okay.

            Hesitation floods in your mind as you stood by the door but soon was replaced when you hear cheers and a familiar laugh coming out from the room—as Usopp opened the door: there you saw him and Luffy.

            You didn’t know when or how but Chopper was clinging and trying to stop Zoro as he chugs a huge bottle of sake. A smile escaped your lips as Luffy called your name in such glee, with a last chug, Zoro finally locked eyes with you: saints, he missed you. You gave him a relieved smile but somehow covered when Hiyori placed a bottle of sake in front of him in which he groaned. He moved the sake aside and watched you talk to Luffy—he should speak to you­­—but before he can speak, he felt hands of Hiyori creeping from behind.

            “You were out for a week.” Brook explained as he drank and ate next to the crew.

            “We aren’t dirty though.” Zoro stated as he eyed his hands.

            “I cleaned you up.” Hiyori announced from behind him, earning a choke from Yamato, as Yamoto looks at you, as you catch his look—you chuckled in your cup as you drank sake. As Sanji and Zoro banters about Hiyori—you laughed at the sight—everything is okay, Wano is free, the crew are laughing, and Zoro is okay.

            “We should have the banquet, today!” Momonosuke announces.

            ---As the entire people cheers, Zoro locked eyes with you once again, as you raised a cup signaling him for a cheer in which he nodded and gave you a cheeky smirk. For the time being, Nami have decided to take a bath, inviting you, Robin, Hiyori, and the others as well.

            You leave the room as the boys continue to drink and eat—that until Zoro noticed that you’re no longer in the room he’s in—he stood up and left the room while also removing the bandages on his body because it restricts his movement as he walked.

--

            You were preparing for the bath when you entered your room until you felt a familiar arm holding you from behind. It didn’t make you flinch nor scared, somehow, it comforted you. You hummed at the person who’s hugging you from behind.

            You felt his chest on your back he holds you tighter. “You left early.”

            “Nami invited us for a bath.”

            “You didn’t talk to me.”

            “You were busy drinking.”

            He then let you go from his grasp and hold your shoulder to make you look at him. “Thanks for cleaning me up.” You smiled softly as you eyed him.

            “Hiyori did.” I teased innocently.

            “She did but you did it every day…”

            “How can you say so?” He then holds your hand and placed it on his cheeks. “I know how your hand feels when you hold me, woman.”

            As he placed your hand on your cheeks—he leaned in at the contact. “I’ve missed you, Zo.” You whispered lowly as you pulled him into an embrace, you settled in his chest as you listen to his heartbeat, beating pretty fast.

            He hummed as you said those words as he fiddled with the strand of your hair as you hugged him. “That was pretty dumb, you know.”

            That left him confused. “Law and Sanji told me what happened—that was dumb, Zoro.” He pulled away from the hug and noticed that some tears are threatening to fall from your eyes.

            He wiped them away as he waited you to continue what you’re about to say. “You almost died.” In that moment, his heartbeat begins to beat faster: you were that worried.

            “That was dumb because the way Law told me, it seems like you were ready to die---”

            “I wanted to protect Luffy and you—”

            His heart breaks as you shook your head. “Protect yourself too. I know you care about the crew but I don’t want to face this again—the fear of you not waking up, like in Thriller Bark? I know you don’t want to lose anyone but—I don’t want to lose you too.” Your hand shakes as you cup his cheeks again.

            He grips your wrist and gave your wrist a ghost kiss, uttering a soft whisper that he can only hear. As he kissed your wrist, he just stared at you. He kissed your hand, fingertips; he kept staring at you.

            As he looked at you with a soft gaze, he pulled you closer to him.

            “I’m sorry.” He only follows Luffy’s orders but—somehow, even you’re not the captain—he follows you. “I’ll get stronger so, you won’t feel like you will lose me again.” He kissed your temples and wiped your tears, as you nodded.

            He stared at you for a while and his eyes lingered in your lips. Without a warning, he placed his lips into yours as you taste the sake he drunk from before. He hummed in your lips as you reciprocate the kiss, he placed his hand on your nape as he was eager to pull you closer to him if that was possible, while your hands roam around his body.

            His chest, neck, abdomen, arms, and biceps—it was explored by you—he pulled away as he settles his lips on your neck muttering your name while he does. Your hand fumbles his hair, as you hold him closer. He kisses and left marks on your neck, while indulge himself with your scent.

            You tilted your head as you gave him more space as his hand traveled in your kimono, pulling it down softly. He pulled away from your neck as his hand travels in your kimono—slowly untying its knot. He whispered your name as low as he could: “Can I…?”

            Your hand travels into his nape as you nod. “Use your words, doll.”

            “Yes…Zo.” You hummed as he let his hand let loose of the knots in your kimono. “I fucking missed you.” He whispered lowly as his lips travel from your neck towards your collarbone.

            “I was just here, Zo.” You felt goosebumps as his hand travels every inch of your body. As his breaths shallows and his lips relaxes on your collarbone and chest. You whimpered his name so low; he’s the only person hearing it. He let his clothes fall on the floor as he lay you down on the futon. But he clicks his tongue as he felt a sharp pain on his chest in which you immediately pulled away.

            “We don’t have to---” He stared at you with flushed cheeks and half lidded eyes: as his eyes travels at everything that is you, he groaned and shook his head as he grabbed you by the hips switching your positions—making you straddle him. He smirked as he saw you on top of him with pride as he pulled you down for a kiss.

            “I fucking want you.” He holds your hips as he moved you in a rhythm. He hummed as you gasped at the pace. “Been looking for you when I woke up.” You felt him so close, despite the small clothes keeping you two apart.

            “You sure it wasn’t the sake?” You teased as you stopped your hips.

            “Take it off…” He whimpered.

            You never thought for a million of years that the pirate hunter would whimper under you—in hearing his plea: you take everything off your body including his: for a moment, the world seemed to stop as your hand travels into his new wounds. Your hand shakes as you saw new stitches.

            Before you can say anything—he grabbed your hand that was tracing his new wounds. “Eyes up here, doll.” He said into your fingertips—but unknown emotion filled you as your lips find his wounds, you carefully kiss them as blush continue to travel around Zoro’s body.

            “Oi…” He continues to repeat as you kiss his wounds. His gaze locks into you as you kissed him on his lower abdomen. He gave you a knowing look: “Come kiss me, woman.”

            So, you did. His hand travels into your clit as he continues to kiss you—as he pulled away: he stared at your expression whilst you stare at him, breathless, blushing mess, and muttering his name every chance you get. As he finds the right time to slip his finger inside you and it made you gasp. “Fuck—so, fucking warm.” He whispered in your ear as his fingers continues to mark your inside.

            He was slow in pace as if he was memorizing your sound, voice, expression, and your look. He kissed your temple as he feels you tightening up. “Great job…baby.” There are times where he lets himself be vulnerable and call you names, he thought he would never use.

            But as your hips meet his hands—he groaned as he moved his hand in a pace where you find yourself gripping his biceps—with one last move, you came undone into his hand as he kissed your temple; “My girl…” he whispered as he felt you shiver in his touch—he pulled his hand away and he kisses his hand while staring at you.

            You smiled and kissed him in his lips: tasting yourself in his mouth. “Better than any sake…” He whispered with a smirk as he continues to kiss your lips. He stared at you as his hand take hold of your hips once more as you aligned yourself into him—he slides his cock between your folds, he felt warm and you felt full.

            “Relax…” You didn’t know how or why or maybe because of the orgasm you had earlier but at the same time he felt bigger. As you settle into his cock, you stayed there as he looks at you. “Babe…” He called you like a prayer—without saying anything, you knew what he wanted. He flipped your over so, he’s now on top of you.

            “I got you—relax, doll.” He whispered in your ear as he stared at you. You pulled him for a kiss as he moves his body to meet yours. “Move…” He takes a short and slow thrust while he stared at your expression which let a small and deep growl out of him.

            As his impatient character caught up to him—he starts to get faster; your head thrown against the futon as you moan his name is if that’s the only word you know. Your hands find his shoulder as you pulled him closer. You’re too perfect for him, your walls were made for him—he finds your neck as he continues to suck and bite on it as you hold onto his shoulder as his make your inside fit for him and only him. At this moment, your name was the only thing leaving his mouth as breathless pleas, whimpers, sound of skin, and moans left the room—tears were stinging in your eye, Zoro noticed it he stopped with the fear that maybe he was hurting you but—it’s different, he saw your tears and you were smiling, you pulled him again for a hug but this time your hips met his. “I really thought I lost you.” You whispered in your embrace.

            That was his call—he holds you’re his hips as your legs wrapped around his waist—as his name left your mouth in a high-pitched whimper; he leaned in and kiss you once more. As he felt your walls claiming his cock again—he knew you were close and so was he; he reaches for your clit and move it with his thrust—without a second, you’re bound for the second orgasm from the hands of the swordsman. Your legs tighten up at his waist, as you arch your back and you feel yourself shakes. Your walls tighten around him as you keep saying his name.

            As you keep saying his name, Roronoa leaned in and kissed your shoulder—for a moment, he swore, he wants to keep you like this; only like this. He fills you up with his cock as his bite into your shoulder; he twitched inside—but he didn’t pull out, reliving and enjoying the warmth settling inside you. His heaving chest and your breathless state; you stared at each other.

            When you two catch your breaths, he pulls out as the both of you hiss at the loss contact. He kissed your inner thighs, chest, hand, head, and lips: uttering a thank you. His hand caress your inner thighs softly, as he kisses your temple over and over again.

            Before you can say anything—he leans down and kisses your lips as you smiled at the kiss. “Still better than sake?” You teased at his kiss.

            He nodded and kissed you deeper. “Still better.” You noticed that one of his stitches on his biceps were getting red—you’re scared that he can get infection— but he just laughed and pulled you into his chest. “I’ll get Chopper to check on it—in the meantime, let’s stay here.” His hands play on your hair as you listen to his heartbeat.

            “I was supposed to be in the bath with Nami.”

            “Hmmm…You could’ve push me away.”

            “You’re lucky that I like you.”

            “I know.” He nodded as he heaved a deep sigh. “Robin told me you didn’t went to sleep, when you’re looking out for me while I was out—don’t do that again, okay, doll?”

            “Just promise me you won’t get yourself killed.” He nodded as he placed your hand on his chest and gently kiss it.           

            “You always kiss my hand…why is that?”

            “I just like it. My hands are like filled with wounds and yours are soft, warm…” He kissed it again. “Mine…” He whispered. “You always hold me so softly.” He admitted.

            You looked at him as you rest your chin on his chest. “Any person should be hold softly and nicely.” He chuckled and shook his head. “With these wound and the swords, I highly doubt I’ll be considered as a person.”

            “What makes you think that…?” You frown.

            “I’m a monster, woman, so, sometimes it surprises me that you stay—"

            “Why do you think you’re a monster?” This time you sat up—he looked at you with a surprise look on his face a parallel to your caring look as his eyes travels on the marks he left in your body; he placed his hand on your shoulder.

            “I don’t see any monster.” You hold his hand that is placed on his shoulder. He always kisses your hand—so, this time, you kissed his.

            “I only see the person that I love.” You kissed his hand, in a delicate manner—as if he was a porcelain glass, a gift from above; he felt his eyes sting as he cleared his throat fighting the blush trying to settle on his cheek.

            “The things you me feel woman—The things you make me feel.” He muttered as he pulled you down for a kiss. You smiled at the kiss as he places his hands on your cheeks, without a sign or a signal; he muttered those three words and eight letters with a small tint of blush on his cheeks.

            “I love you too, Roronoa.”

-- FIN

holy shit--my first ever smut; if it sucks--i'm sorry :,> zoro the man that you are! trafalgar law is next and it's fluff--wano arc has me gripping all story ideas lmaooo

⚘ masterlist 1 | 2 | 3

[f1version]

NEW YEAR'S DAY ‧͙*̩̩͙❅ LH44

pairing: Lewis Hamilton x girlfriend!Reader ( she/her )

summary: New years is always special when you spend it next to those you love the most. That’s why you spend it with Lewis, and Lewis spends it with you.

warnings/info: fluff, midnight kisses, mentions of alcohol, they get a bit drunk. the extra bit has angst!

word count: 951 + an extra scene of 591 (1.5k)

note: so, the end of 2023. that’s so crazy. i’m so thankful for everything really, there’s a paragraph incoming but, yeah, thank you for reading and following along this year. you made a difference <3

btw i recomend listening to the instrumental of new year’s day by taylor swift !!

snowglobe, a holiday special

One minute before midnight. One minute in which people fall anxious, the sound of heels hitting the floor and whispers reciting resolutions over and over is their favorite tune for one minute. In your minute, you see people gather around the terrace of Lewis’ penthouse, stumbling and laughing, the blinding lights of New York lighting up part of their snow-dusted faces. You knew a couple of faces, some interacting with Lewis and you before your minute hit the half-mark. 

When you’re upon seconds, you look up at the waiting sky, stars expecting to be overshadowed by something bigger, louder. You can feel the anticipation in the air, spotlights from Times Square moving faster, the echo of people’s excitement drowning the streets.

Fifteen seconds away and you look at the man holding you close. His eyes dart between your eyes and your lips, a smile that could light up the world—and already does—on his lips. I don’t do New Year’s kisses, you remember him saying last year, back when your memories together consisted of clandestine meetings in hotel rooms and longing stares, too afraid to confess.

Perhaps this year is a completely different story, but the same character has his arms wrapped around you. There are changes, so many you can barely count, you wonder if this one will be one too.

“So,” Lewis says, “what a year.”

You smile, leaving a kiss on his cheek before resting your forehead on his. “You finally got the hint,” you whisper and he laughs, bringing you closer just as the insatiable sounds of anxiety start morphing into something discernible.

Ten. Nine. 

He lets out a deep breath, “I know what I said last year. About the kisses.”

Eight, they sing as your heart picks up. Seven, and Lewis laughing nervously. 

“And I mean it,” he says, “Meant it.”

Six. Five. Four.

You smile as your side of the world lift their glasses of champagne, recording phones, or just bring their loved ones close. It’s a bubble bath of each life trapped in its own delicate bubble.

Lewis smiles back, breathing heavily, “But I want you to be my first New Year's kiss.”

Three, and you laugh, rolling your eyes. Two, “Then kiss me,”

One, and he closes the distance, the so obnoxious world goes silent, and it’s the best kiss he’s ever received. It’s immersive; Your hands play with his braids and his draw shapes on your hips, his heavy breaths fall over your soft ones, and the taste of two different bottles of champagne tempt to be bitter.

The world around you starts echoing in your head, different colors tinting the perfect kiss. People are patting Lewis’ back as he looks at you, ignoring them for a little longer, only wanting to focus on the girl who enchanted him, the one he could hear talk and talk about for hours on end, the one who changed his mind over love and relationships, the one who held his hand through his darkest times. This was all he needed, all he wanted to focus on. On the girl he loves. 

“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” you tease, daydream still in his eyes.

He smiles, “Oh, absolutely not”

Then you’re walking around, hand-in-hand wishing a happy New Year to the known and the unknown. He calls his family and you call yours, spending ten minutes together sweet-talking to a very sleepy Roscoe on Lewis’ screen. It’s absurd how fast minutes pass but how slow time moves. You see the crowd fading away, leaving the dance floor empty enough to drag Lewis’ over, dancing away the hectic city under you. It’s a new year, and you can’t warp your head around your luckiness.

By 5:44, everyone is gone. You and Lewis lay down on the couch after drowning 6 shots of Tequila, a strong scent of alcohol and sweat hanging in the air, with glitter all across the floor. You’re holding hands, eyes fixated on the ceiling, drunk and in love. What a wonderful way to start the year, you think. 

Lewis moves next to you, standing up a bit disoriented but with determination on his face. “A’right get up,” he says too enthusiastically for almost 6 am, “we have to pick all of this mess.”

You snort, ”Are you crazy?” 

“As ever,” he giggles, “Now, get up!”

This man is incredibly drunk, but so are you, so you stand up, your head spinning around each planet you can barely remember. Lewis puts his hands around your hips, holding you in place, “Lew, I feel like I'm going to fall and die. Oh my god!”

“Not true,” the Brit says, “you promised you’d die with me, and I’m not doing that today.”

You roll your eyes at that, laughing. 

Cleaning up—if you can call two drunk idiots laughing like crazy while trying to remove a stain of wine from the ceiling that—isn’t as awful. Spotify’s ‘Top Hits of 2023’ is playing in the background as you pick up the plastic cups on the floor, Lewis searching for dirty bottles around the house to then be wrapped around each other while cleaning them. The glittery floor is a lost cause, both try to recollect as much as you can with the broom but give up knowing you’ll be surrounded by it for the rest of the year. 

The house looks clean enough in your exhausted eyes by 8 am. Lewis follows you to the bedroom, briefly showering together before dropping under the cloud-like covers, dark curtains forbidding the early sun from disturbing your shortly-approaching sleep. 

You are curled up on Lewis’ chest when you hear him say: “Happy New Year, love.” 

“Happy New Year, Lew.”

EXTRA BIT!! ( 591 words )

“You know,” Lewis calls, arms wrapped around your body as you lay on his bare chest, “I’ve been thinking, well, overthinking, and I want to, like, get it out.”

He pauses, his anxiety clear in the way he speeds up the tender touches on your back. You look up at him, making a small motion of encouragement. He smiles.

“Half of the people today were strangers, friends of friends, and it reminded me that, once, you were a friend of friends. I don’t really know where I’m going with this, but I don’t want us to be like that ever again,” he says, stumbling on words. “I don’t want to call you a stranger; I’ve done that with enough people I’ve loved—not in the way I love you, but loved nonetheless. I’m just so sorry I was so late to this,” he whispers, and you want to interrupt, reminding him that you also played into it, but he talks first: “I know you were also scared to tell me; you don’t have to say it, but you just didn’t deserve all that waiting.”

You search for his hand, needing to hold it. He understands and wraps one of his around yours, taking a deep breath. He says your name before continuing. “You are the best thing that has ever happened to me, ever. I was scared because of those stupid things I used to tell myself, and you know the rumors around my last relationship. I was terrified of doing the same thing—being too greedy and distancing myself when things got bad—but I didn’t want to lose you. I do not want to lose you.” Lewis says, and you squish his hand three times, reassuring. You feel another breath being taken. “And I know we are okay; we are so wonderful, sweetheart. You’ve taught me so much, but I can’t stop thinking about the what-ifs. What if we have some inconceivable fight? What if the distance during next season messes with us? What if I screw up and you don’t want to see me ever again?”

“I really don’t want to lose you. I love you too much,” he concludes.

You feel tears crowding your eyes, wondering when did he started thinking about all of this. You sit up, looking down at his beautiful face in the faint darkness. His eyes are so full of emotion, so caring and afraid. You cup his face in your hands, leaning down to peck his lips.

“I love you too, so incredibly much. Thank you for opening up,” you said, knowing it was hard for him to talk about these topics. “But, Lew, trust me when I tell you that, as long as both of us are willing to fight for it, we won’t go back to being strangers. When these types of thoughts are overwhelming you again, talk to me, let me know, and we will discuss them together." He has tears in his eyes, and you are sure yours are already streaming down. “Don’t try to read the last page; whatever is written there can change, and if it doesn’t, who cares? Maybe we are set up to die together, just like I promised you, yeah? I’ll hold your hand through it.”

He brings you down to his arms, giving you the warmest hug in the freezing winter. He cries, and you do too, talking here and there, leaving kisses everywhere, drowning in each other's touches. Lewis believes this is the best start to a year he’s ever had.

taglist — @smartstupyd @ziarah @nouvellevqgue @iloveyou3000morgan @carsgovroomm @goldenalbon @doofenshmirtzevil-inc @panicsinvirgo . . . add yourself here

[nyonyen]

NSFW ALPHABET - randal

AO3

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

inseparable, attached to you like a damn lamprey (mouth included)

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

randal loves his tongue and how uncomfortable it makes you when he tries to lick your eyeballs he loves your stomach, he never fails to make you painfully aware that there’s only so much separating your insides from the outside

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

as for any hentai obsessed scum, he wants it all over you, no place uncovered. he’ll milk himself dry to make his own bukkake hentai, you know?

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

is there anything dirty about him that he keeps secret? well, maybe that he tends to prefer bottoming, or at least being forced into submission

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

hell naw. he-hell naw. randal’s nge doujinshis do not have any anatomical knowledge that could help!

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

spooning 100%, especially when you’re still asleep. just slip it to the side… it’s very convenient, and lets him easily breathe down your neck

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

he’s neither serious nor unserious, he just is

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

plucks each hair out with a pair of tweezers because it’s funny

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

full blown obsession. randal likes to call himself a yandere type when it comes to you, and is he wrong?

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

whenever the time arises, which is often, he plants himself face first, ass up, and jerks it crazy style

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

literally anything humiliating he is game for, receiving & giving. he also has a thing for making other people watch… forced voyeurism? he’s quite thankful for the hierarchy poster

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

in the woods, and in his coffin

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

nosebleeds, upskirt shots in anime (ecchi ecchi!), online arguments… what doesn’t get randal going?

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

uh…

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

in a perfect world, every time would be a 69, that’s his attitude towards it. addicted to fucking your face, and having you suffocate him

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

incredibly rough, no matter the speed

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

since his opinion on cum is quite… extreme, it is a bit hard to do quickies. however, when has that ever stopped randal?

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

duh. if there’s something erotic randal doesn’t know about, he’d be surprised

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

as long as it takes, that’s his prerogative!

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

addicted to toys. if there’s anything that can make you and him squirm beyond belief, he needs to have it. he’s partial to bunny vibes

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

teasing is randal’s middle name (probably). will deny you orgasms constantly, but rarely follows through. you just look so cute when you cum!

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

the loudest ever. luther scolds him day in and day out, but he physically can’t hold back. maybe gags are something you should explore?

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

draws doujins of you and him. it's incredibly cringy, but man... he definitely memorized your body. look at the detail!

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

5-inch, curved to the side (we know why)

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

insatiable. utterly insatiable, so please watch out for internal bruising, okay?

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

relishes in watching you sleep, so it depends on whether or not he wants to continue the pleasure in a shared dream :)

[critterbitter]

HELLO HI ID LIKE TO ASK WHAT PROGRAM AND BRUSHES YOU USE CUZ IM LITTERALY EXPLODING EVERYTIME I SEE YOUR ART

actually actually... *pulls out whole stack of paper*...I have. a FEW,, a good few,, questions to ask. they are not many I swear 😇

OK SO FIRST OF ALL HOW DO YOU DRAW SO FAST???? everyday I log onto Tumblr I always see something new from you and I get very very happy. But then I start to question my own existence because not even I CAN SPEED RUN ART LIKE THAT. AND SO SPECTACULARLY TOO

Last question! how do you color and make it look so well?? just. How. I need to know. This is a CRY FOR HE-

anyway thank you for being one of my favorite artists that always feed my brain rot, pls keep making amazing art because like a little yamper I will follow behind and stay updated.

(Stands there)

Response and thoughts under cut!

First question! What art program I use!

Mostly procreate, along with a handful of brushes! (Specifically the Jing Set and some custom stuff, which is really just a circle brush with the shape changed to a square.)

Second question! How do i draw so much!

Okay so. I am. Ahhah. Unemployed,,,,? No, I do freelance illustration, but hmm. A studio job would be nice.

i graduated college last year and I’m very used to eight hour art shifts. The body sort of remembers to keep working, even though I no longer have storyboards or visdev homework to do.

Also. The hyperfixation is a deep vast tunnel I STILL have not seen the end of the light to, good golly. (I have dreams now about the kids committing shenanigan crimes. I wake up in cold sweat and write them down in a journal. It’s like being the mouthpiece to an angry god.)

So the overall gist is: I was trained to be a storyboard artist with a visdev background, and I’m using that higher education to draw funny muppets because my brain’s funny.

I also DO have a queue, and I’ve been treating this as a sort of inktober project. I am definitely going to slow down soon though! Maybe. Hopefully. Ah… (sheepishly drops my kofi here)

Third question! How do i color!

I. I, uh. I dont know man the coloring demons have a grip on my soul and i just go along for the ride. But also, if it helps, i prefer to limit my pallets to only a few colors at a time. Lighting is king, so if you can figure out if you want to focus on either on your lights or shadows, you’ll have a much easier time composing. That, and symbolic colors— idk, something hits different about art drenched in gold with a tiny hint of a man staring into the blinding horizon, or a green leafy environment with a single dot of artificial red. I also like using blue and purple for shadows, and I’m a big fan of muting colors with only one or two that pop— one of the reasons why I was so attracted to submas in the first place is because from a design aesthetic, they’re both super funny muppet men AND really cool train guys that have a limited pallet and thematic apparel.

Overall response! THANK YOU SO MUCH. This goes out to a BUNCH of people who sent me inbox queries— sorry for not responding, it’s a tad overwhelming because some of them are story questions even I don’t really know will go yet, and others are words of praise and I’m selfish and like scrolling through the inbox to look at them when I feel down. I am more of an artist who sits in the corner and sprouts like a potato rather then a branching vine who socializes, but I really do see people’s responses and they make me go :)))))

Okay ramble over. Thanks for coming to the soapbox, and good luck on creating!

[luveline]

i always feel a little silly when sending nsfw reqs lol but.. eddie taking you from behind for the first time? love u!

i feel a little silly writing them too it's okay!! love you!! MDNI 18+ (cw: smut, p in v, prone(?)) ♡ shy!fem!reader | 1k words

"Eds," you say quietly, feeling weirdly insecure despite how many times he's seen you naked, "you'll tell me if I look weird, right?" 

He tightens his arm around you where you've perched on his thigh in only an oversized t-shirt and your underwear, his head ducking down towards yours. "What are you talking about?" 

"If I look weird from… from behind." 

He smiles and squeezes your hip under his hand. "You know I've seen it all before, right?" 

You nod. It's really nice to be able to talk with him about all of this stuff before you actually enact it. For some people it might come easy. You need a little more assurance, and Eddie's happy to give it to you. 

He kisses your cheek. "You look good from every angle, idiot." 

You feel heat rise to your cheeks at his heartfelt, if slightly mean, compliment and hide your face in his chest. Eddie hardly minds, his hand stroking down your hip to your thigh and creeping inward. 

"My shy girl," he murmurs, an impossible mixture of mocking and sympathetic. 

From there you're putty in his hands, limp under his teasing touches, his lips pressed absent-mindedly to your forehead as his hand cups your cunt. He presses the breadth of his palm to your clothed clit and rubs rough circles, listening for that hitch in your breath that proves he's found it. 

He pushes aside your underwear and draws a line down from the bump of your clit to your entrance. "Somebody's excited," he says smugly. 

You shudder as he pushes slowly inward. Soon, you're worked over entirely, stretched out on his two thick fingers and needing more. You can feel his cock hard against your thigh and know he's similarly desperate, echoing your little pants and moans with his own.

He groans loudly as he pulls out his hand. The sound sends goosebumps racing down your arms, worse when he holds up his shining fingers and parts them slowly, a ribbon of wetness between them. "Fuck, baby, look how wet you are." 

"Are you ready?" you ask him, looking up pleadingly. 

He blinks at you, surprised at how fast you've unraveled. As quick as it comes it's gone, and he's easing you off his lap and kissing your forehead. "Ready," he confirms. "You wanna lie on your front for me?" 

You go down easy. It feels strange. You look over your shoulder as he positions himself between your thighs, his chain tickling between your shoulder blades as he leans forward to grab one of the pillows. 

He needles an arm under your stomach and pulls you up without explanation, tucking the pillow underneath your stomach and hips. You gasp, head fuzzy, always happy to be manhandled into position and trying to tamp down how embarrassed you're feeling to be bared like this to him, worse when he starts to tug down your underwear. 

He says something under his breath. 

"What?" you ask, trying to sit up to look. 

He pushes you down with a stern hand at the small of your back. "Just admiring the view." You jump as his thumb pushes into your hole. He shushes you gently and works inside, groaning to himself amorously as slick dribbles down your cunt. "Oh, fuck, sweetheart. Need to fill you up." 

You shift your thighs open wider and hope he takes it for what it is. 

He chuckles. It's a dark sound. "You want that? Wanna tell me what you want?" 

You reach up to hug the pillow in front of you, heartbeat pounding and tummy aching with want. "Please, Eddie, I-" 

He doesn't have the patience. You feel the head of his cock rub up and down your opening and gasp as the tip pushes in. He slows, stills, hand on your thigh and moving up to squeeze the globe of your ass. "Okay?" 

"Yeah," you say quickly, roughly, "keep going." 

"So demanding," he says, words sticky with sweetness as he pushes in another inch, two. It feels fucking amazing, the stretch, the tip of his cock dragging against your gummy heat, moulding you into shape. 

You moan as he pulls out to push back in deeper, opening you up, his hips pressing into you as he fucks to the hilt. It's a sudden fullness and it aches in the best way. You push your face into the pillow in efforts to hide the awful sound you make, an excited bubble of pleasure. 

Eddie presses his weight into you and lowers his chest to your back, hand on the nape of your neck. "How's that feel?" he asks into your ear, a genuine question. "Is that okay?" 

You nod hurriedly. He stays where he is but rocks his hips up into you. This new position – his weight, the heat and size of him above you and the immediate fullness, the pleasure as his cock rocks into your sweet spot – was a terrible idea. 

"Oh my god," you say, feeling incredibly close to tears. "Eddie. Fuck, baby." 

He slides his hands under your front to cup your chest. "I know. Should've done this a long time ago." 

You can't find the words to agree as he ruts in, dissolving, useless underneath him. Eddie seems content to take it slow, cock probing deep but gentle as he noses into the juncture of your neck and starts to kiss you, open-mouthed kisses that leave your skin wet and stinging. 

If he keeps on like this you might never leave his bed again. 

He snaps his hips forward and you make your loudest sound yet, tightening around him instinctively. His answering moan is spun silver dripping over you, heating you up from the outside in. 

"Shit, make that sound again," he begs. 

You make that sound again. Again and again and again. 

[l0v3tast3]

anyone else randomly daydream about captain price fucking his s/o against one of those windows and/or glass sliding doors where you can see out but people can’t see in ? no ? just me ?

i will be from now on, on a half-hourly basis. your brain is a genius anon mwah!!!!

of course john already has those windows in his house, installed before he even moved in. so naturally the idea forms pretty early on into your relationship, the thought of being so close but still far enough from being caught by not only strangers, but his neighbors, ones you'll live next to as well when you move in.

you'll be over one day, standing in front of the counter when john comes up behind you and his hands land on your sides, drifting to your stomach and just underneath your breasts. he'll bend down close to your ear and mumble sweet words, "y'look so cute in those shorts, darling. look cute in just about anything, really." you smile and turn around in his hold, resting your hands on his broad shoulders. with the question of what he thinks you look the best in, a chuckle slips past his lips, leaning down close to you. "think you look best in nothing, princess."

he'll lift you up onto the counter and eat you out there, ravenous for you and your sweet cunt. it's not long before he curls the two fingers he buries inside you and makes you cum, back arching while you shake and press your head against the cabinet door behind you.

while you're still in your post-orgasm haze he kisses his way back up your body to your lips, sweet and slow, coaxing you back from your high. john gently wraps your arms around his neck and your legs around his waist, easily picking you up and walking over to the floor-to-ceiling windows in the living room just a few steps away.

the cold glass makes you press into him with a little whine into his lips. he draws away and laughs a bit, adjusting his grip (just as easily with the support of the window) to hold you up with one hand to line his cock up with your drenched hole. it's a point he makes to keep eye contact with you when he first pushes into you, his head popping through your tight entrance and burrowing in deeper. john is obsessed with the way you gasp and whine, breathing getting quicker the closer he gets to brushing against your cervix. you dig your nails into his back and grip the cropped hair on the back of his head, tightening the hold of your legs around him; your only option is to let him use you as he pleases, holding on as well as you can while he picks up the pace.

"y'want them to see you like this?" he teases, the corner of his mouth quirking up as he feels your cunt squeeze him even harder. "want them to see how well you take me? hah, wish they could see in, don't you? c'mon darling, tell me you do. use your words like a good girl, just like i taught you."

you do your best to whine and nod your head up and down while he bounces you on his cock, already getting close enough to cumming again that words won't form anymore. it's not enough for him; john doesn't stand for disobedience, not in the army nor from you, even when he's got you all dumb and fucked out (especially then, just for the sake of being a tease). he'll bury himself back inside you balls-deep, stopping and planting a hand next to your head, leaning in until you're nose-to-nose.

"told y'to use your words, didn't i?"

you whimper and dig your nails in deeper, grip his hair harder, trying to rock your hips against his. "john- john, please-"

"not what i asked for, princess."

he can feel your face heat up further and watches as you try to remember what he asked for, brows furrowing and eyes misting up in a way that almost made his feel sorry.

"want them to- t'see me takin' your cock," you eventually whisper, shy and breathy. "wish they could see me- ah!" you're cut off by him starting the same fast, deep pace again.

"that's my girl."

[tothemeadow]

can you make a dream of mine come true? its where the trio are on a mission during the mission they get hit with a lust demon art. when they are done with the mission they are drooling for y/n. they all want you at the same time. and you need to try to treat them without them killing you.

goddamn anonnie this is so TASTY ����

'three's a crowd' / Kamaboko Trio x Reader

warnings: NSFW, mild gore, mild dubcon, oral sex, fingering, handjobs, three on one action, all the fuggin mayonaise

words: 3,961

notes: aged up characters, AFAB reader/female bits, they/their pronouns

-

“Continue west! West! Almost there!” the Kasugai squawks overhead.

“We get it, you damn crow!” Inosuke yells back. “I oughta cook you already!”

“Inosuke,” Tanjiro quips, “focus.”

Grumbling, Inosuke ceases his verbal attack at the bird and turns his attention to the path before him. Zenitsu, on the other hand, snickers to himself.

Once again, the three make their way to whatever destination calls them; demons are everywhere, ready to pounce at any time. One must keep moving if they’re part of the corps. This time, though, rather than going single, Tanjiro’s Kasugai crow collected the three of them, informing the trio of a rampant demon terrorizing a town and its surroundings.

It wouldn’t be the first (or last) time that a demon goes on mass killing sprees, but to have so many victims in a short amount of time… It’s troubling, to say the least. Knowing that it’s eating more than well is enough to raise concerns, and it would be a foolish decision to let a single person walk towards their death. Having three people should make the task easier – hopefully.

They’ve discussed what little details fellow crows managed to compile – all the victims seem to be male, none of them dropping under the age of 16. Other than that, well… that’s for the trio to figure out.

Before too long, the crow gives a final squawk and takes an abrupt turn, soaring away from the group. Up ahead, silhouettes of houses break through the expanse of orange sky. At long last, they’ve finally made it to their destination. However, as the sun continues to set and night creeps closer, they’ll have to come with a plan – and fast.

“Kamado Tanjiro!” another Kasugai crow calls out.

The three look to the sky as the crow flies towards them from the direction of the town.

“Waiting for you, yes! Preparations are underway!”

“Guys, hey! Over here!” another new voice shouts.

On the outskirts of town, you wave the other three down, your free hand cupping the side of your mouth. The Kasugai crow circles back around and heads back towards you, seemingly leading the way. The three boys slow their running to a jog as they come closer to you, surprise written on their faces. As far as they were concerned, nobody else was assigned to this mission.

Tanjiro calls out your name as they draw even closer still, a smile spreading itself across his face. “What are you doing here?”

“Backup, apparently,” you say without missing a beat. “I was nearby when I was summoned.”

Zenitsu, appearing absolutely ecstatic to see you, hastily cuts the others off before they have a chance to speak. “It’s great to see you,” he gushes, face heating up. “How have you been?”

Inosuke makes a gagging noise. You can’t see his face beneath the mask, but you can tell its scrunched up in disgust. “Can you not think with your dick for once?”

Zenitsu impatiently swats at him, his ponytail swinging from the sheer force of the movement. “Says you, you muscle-brained idiot! You’re the one who humps tree hollows when no one’s looking!”

Tanjiro facepalms.

Surprisingly, you laugh. “It’s good to see that you boys haven’t changed much.” The mirth disappears from your face as your expression darkens. “Still… You’ve been updated as to what’s been going on lately, right?”

Nodding, Tanjiro steps another closer to you, ignoring the bickering two behind him. “Disappearances, yeah. Any bodies been found?”

“That’s not what I’m quite sure of yet. If the demon doesn’t have some sort of domain they can pull their prey into, they must be directing the men to some lair.”

Hearing you specifically say men makes a shiver run down Tanjiro’s spine. Hell, if anything goes wrong, his friends – himself included – could be in big, big trouble.

You continue. “It’s odd that they’re targeting such a select group of people. Do you think it could be a female demon?”

“I wouldn’t push away the thought, although it’s not the exact reason yet.”

“I say we use this dumbass as bait,” Zenitsu snips. He squeals as Inosuke takes him in a headlock.

“Whatever it is we’re dealing with, I wanna kill it!” Inosuke exclaims in his ever so charming brash way of his. He cackles, his thick arms squeezing tighter around Zenitsu’s neck.

“Night’s approaching. Come on, we’ve got to get ready,” you say. You snap your fingers at Inosuke. “Let him go. He’s not going to be much use to us if you kill him, no?”

Grumbling, Inosuke does as told and finally lets Zenitsu go. Zenitsu collapses onto his knees, sputtering and clutching at his throat. “You… asshole…!”

-

“You’ve… got to be kidding me.”

The cavern is relatively 6 meters wide, 10 meters tall; it’s not deep, rather a shallow divot in the forest walls amongst the rocks piling into a mountain. What’s surprising, though, is the number of bodies hanging from the ceiling. Bodies is a pretty giving word – you meant to say skeletons.

Each of them is upside down, arms extended past their heads. The bones are picked nearly clean, their white sheen telling you that they’re relatively fresh. The cavern doesn’t smell of spoiled meat or blood, so it most likely means that the demon at hand stripped them bare before attaching them to the roof of the cave.

To your side, Zenitsu shakes, bottom lip quivering in a way that seems like it’s vibrating. His knees clack together as a pathetic whimper escapes his throat.

Inosuke scratches the back of his head. “At least they’re not suffering, right?”

“Inosuke,” Tanjiro snaps.

“It has to be nearby,” you interject, quickly discouraging any potential argument. “Demons just don’t leave their… collection out for anyone to grab.”

Zenitsu hastily shakes his head. “Hell no. I’m not sticking around long enough to find out!”

“WhY nOt?”

Zenitsu screams; he leaps into your arms, hands linking together behind your neck. Within a few paces from his previous spot, a grotesque demon stares at your group, head cocked at an unnatural angle. Black, stringy hair falls in its face, its eyes nothing more than empty sockets. The body resembles a mantis, the prickles on its forearms dripping with what you presume is a poison.

How fun.

The demon’s lips draw back in a snarl, jagged teeth gleaming in the low light. It seems to be glaring right at you. “LeT hIm Go.” The voice is no better than dragging nails down a chalkboard. You can’t help but wince.

If this thing is going to try to kill you, it wouldn’t hurt to ask for some basic information, no? Shifting your weight, you turn so that Zenitsu is sheltered behind you, your chin tucked over your shoulder. “And why would I do that exactly, hmm? It doesn’t seem like you’re very hospitable to your guests.”

“Please just tell us,” Tanjiro’s voice rings out, yet it sounds muffled. Looking over, you’re met with the sight of him clutching a hand over his nose, expression scrunched in disgust. Instinctively, you whiff at the air, but there’s nothing worth noting. Odd.

The demon’s face jerks in Tanjiro’s direction. “MaLe. NiNeTeEn. DeLiCiOuS.”

You huff. “What about me?” If your previous hypothesis is correct, then the demon should show a preference for the guys in your group…

Once again, the demon snarls at you. “FeMaLe.”

Bingo.

“Inosuke, now!” you yell.

The demon swivels its head around just in time to see Inosuke leaping at it, dual blades extending in graceful arcs towards its neck. It screeches as it barely dodges, the sharp, uneven edges catching the flesh of its jugular. Blood spews from the wound, a blackish red that is far from a human’s.

Setting Zenitsu down (he’s already passed out, who knew?) you draw your own blade. Tanjiro’s already ahead of you, charging at the demon at a speed naked to the untrained eye. Soon, the three men and you are taking turns swinging at the demon’s fleshy neck, attacks bouncing off each other in a dizzying rhythm. Blood and poison fly in fat droplets each time a hit lands; whether either is harmful, you don’t know. Blood already speckles your face and uniform, yet you don’t feel any pain or discomfort.

The fight continues into the wee hours of the night; it’s been a while since the fight left the cave, migrating into the woods instead. While your group makes use of the branches and the sturdy trunks, the demon does the same. A sweep of the hind legs sends you flying, your body crashing through the surrounding branches and other foliage. A sharp gasp breaks free as your spine makes contact with the rough bark of a tree. Your vision swims, but the bloodcurdling scream emitting from the demon has your ears perking and hairs standing on end.

As your vision clears, silence sets in. It’s still a few hours before dawn cracks and the forest properly wakes up. The usual trill of bugs fills the atmosphere, broken by the slight haggard breath here and there. With a groan, you draw yourself to a stand and waddle over to where the other three stand. Your blade slips into your sheath with a clean schlink – the sound of a job well done.

“Is everyone alright?” you croak. Thankfully, your eyes have long adjusted to the near nonexistent lighting, so you’re able to locate the others fairly well.

Inosuke grumbles and promptly throws himself onto the ground, limbs spread eagle. Zenitsu is sitting against a tree, his head cradled in his hands. Neither reaction is cause for concern (not usually, anyway), but Tanjiro… Tanjiro looks ill. You notice his nostrils flare whenever you draw closer.

“Tanjiro?”

“Fucking hell!” Inosuke yells. “Can’t you say anything else than his name for once?”

Your brows furrow together. “Inosuke, what are you going on about now?”

Zenitsu groans from his spot.

Gods, are all of them sick? Did the demon’s poison have more of an effect than you originally thought?

Slowly, Zenitsu picks himself off the ground and shuffles over. His arms sling themselves around you again, but it’s different than before. His touch feels different. You jump in place as he buries his face in the crook of your neck and inhales deeply.

“Oi! You son of a bitch!” Inosuke yells again. Foliage and twigs crunch under him as he scrambles to get up, entire body flexing angrily as he reaches for Zenitsu. “Off!”

You send a pleading look towards Tanjiro. Surely he would have an idea of what’s going on, right?

Right??

Still, Tanjiro refuses to say anything. His eyes are glued to yours, his jaw slack. He hastily wipes at his gaping lips and chin, yet it does nothing to hide the sheen of saliva sticking to his skin. A soft thunk brings your attention back to the two crowding around you; Inosuke has abandoned his boar head, the poor thing looking almost lonely on the ground. He openly lavishes your neck, tongue licking fat stripes against the skin.

A firm shove to the chest sends Inosuke falling straight onto his ass. You cup the side of your neck, completely scandalized. He doesn’t seem deterred by your rejection – if anything, it makes his eyes glow hungrily through the dark, a small growl rumbling in his throat.

Something hard pokes into your hip. You flash a wild look at Zenitsu. He merely looks back at you with a pleading gaze, his bottom lip tucked behind his teeth.

You swallow heavily. “Guys,” you start slowly, carefully, “we can get you to a Wisteria House or the Butterfly Mansion. I need you to keep your heads on straight. Breathe.”

“Please,” Zenitsu murmurs.

…Fuck.

Just like with Inosuke, you shove Zenitsu away. However, instead of staying there and lecturing them, you abruptly turn on your heel and run. It’s a ridiculous idea, you’re well aware of that, but the more distance you put between yourself and the three men, the better. Whatever was in that demon’s poison, it’s clearly messing with their psyches. You need time to think up a plan – and fast.

Trees fly by in a hazy blur as you make your escape. As you scale up a trunk, you hear not-so-distant shouts of your name echoing. From there, you jump from limb to limb, movements sleek and well-practiced. When was the last time you were chased like this? It had to have been a few years, at least, not since you were a fresh corps member.

It hits you before you see it; the sheer force of the collision rips the air from your lungs. Flashes of yellow fill your peripheral and a panicked word rings throughout your brain. Thunder.

Fortunately, Zenitsu has enough sense not to let you fall to the forest floor. He lands squarely on his feet with you held tightly in his arms. Both Tanjiro and Inosuke appear not a second later, and it’s only then that you realize that they’re all drenched in sweat.

Tanjiro says your name; he sounds pained, yet sweet. Guilt swims in the depths of his eyes, but another emotion lays over it heavily. It’s a look you’ve seen in Tengen’s eyes when he’s with his wives, or when Obanai is staring longingly at Mitsuri. You begin to squirm in Zenitsu’s hold, but his arms only tighten around you.

It’s hard to say who attacks first. One moment, you’re watching Tanjiro with a bated breath; the next, you’re on your back, staring up at three different faces. There’s a pair of rough hands tugging away at your haori, the buttons of your uniform. Goosebumps erupt over your skin once cool air caresses it, but then those very hands are fondling your breasts.

“Wait- No-“ you stammer.

A squeak breaks from your throat as your nipples are yanked on, calloused thumbs rolling them into stiff peaks. Zenitsu swears under his breath, his eyes glued to your chest. Inosuke looks just as lost, his gaze a million miles away. Tanjiro flashes you a timid smile.

“Please, just… Bear with us,” he tells you. Leaning down, he skims his lips against your temple. He breathes your name. “We’ll take care of you. I promise.”

A mouth latches around a nipple, eliciting a sharp breath from you. “What… What happened to you guys…?”

“That damned demon sprayed something at us,” Inosuke slurs. It sounds like his mouth is full.

Zenitsu promptly pushes Tanjiro’s head away and descends, his lips capturing yours. Your mind stalls as he pushes his tongue inside, a moan following soon after. You’re aware of Zenitsu’s stories of “wooing” women (to which degree you believe him is relatively low) and his general berating of Tanjiro and Inosuke’s lack of skills, but this… Well, it appears that he lives up to those stories.

You never thought you’d catch yourself kissing Zenitsu (if tongue and teeth equal as such) but it feels good. Still, this is wrong. These boys are your friends, and they’re under the influence of some Demon Art. That itself is odd, considering the effects of one die off as soon as the demon is killed. This poison had to be of some outside nature; possibly a concoction that the demon created itself?

Tanjiro busies himself with stroking your hair and the skin he can reach. He’s steadily breathing in your scent, little murmurs of appreciation and groans filling your ear. Inosuke suckles on your breast, teeth gnawing on your nipple until it’s flushed and swollen. Your lips are in a similar state once Zenitsu finally pulls away.

“I want to eat you,” Zenitsu says. The wicked flicker in his eyes tells you that he’s being completely serious.

You shuffle to sit up, but Tanjiro pushes you back down by your shoulders, smile apologetic but eyes the same as Zenitsu’s. “Wait, wait, wait- You’re not going to kill me, are you?”

“I get why that bastard strung all those guys up,” Inosuke grunts.

Your eyes go wide.

A silent agreement passes between the three and there goes Zenitsu’s hands again, undoing your belt and yanking your hakama down. Tanjiro hisses at the scent of your gathering arousal; it’s clear that your traitorous body enjoyed their attention a bit too much. Your fundoshi gets pealed away and your thighs instinctively clench together, wanting to hide your precious core from their hungry eyes.

“Open up,” Zenitsu breathes. He wiggles his way in between your legs and pries your thighs apart. Three sets of eyes focus on your puffy lower lips, at the sheen of arousal coating them. Embarrassment floods your face. “Beautiful,” Zenitsu openly moans.

You’re left completely speechless as Zenitsu ducks down, mouth latching onto your pussy. With a jolt, you shout his name, heart beating furiously against your ribcage. You’re genuinely worried it’ll try leaping from your chest and run away into the night. It takes a moment for your brain to catch up with what’s exactly happening; Zenitsu laps at your insides with purposeful movements, his nose held stiff to your clit.

“Move over,” Inosuke barks. He grabs a hold of Zenitsu’s haori and yanks him away, quickly taking his spot and raking his teeth against your sensitive flesh. You try to jerk away from him, but he wraps his strong arms around your thighs, holding you in place as he works you open with his tongue. He’s not as skilled as Zenitsu, but he makes it up with sheer enthusiasm.

Tanjiro takes your hand in his, his lips skimming your knuckles. It’s comforting, but you know he’s going to be wanting something from you as well. He directs your hand to his crotch; something hot meets your hand and Tanjiro shudders. Your eyes drop from his face, the sight of your fingers wrapped around his heavy cock causing something to stir in your gut.

Inosuke groans as your slick pours into his mouth, his hips pressed firmly to the ground. Zenitsu follows in Tanjiro’s footsteps and comes to your other side; your hand soon finds his own cock, precum leaking from the flushed tip.

Shit, this is really happening. If you go through with this, will the poison’s effects wear off? Will you be able to look at the trio the same ever again?

You tentatively squeeze both cocks and the delightful sound of deep groans fill your ears.

All doubts disappear.

Frankly, you’re not even sure how you’re supposed to go about this, but you still give it your best shot. The precum oozing from their cockheads make the slide of your hands easier, much to their satisfaction. Inosuke’s mouth is still hot on your drooling pussy, his eyes fixated on your parted lips and hooded eyes. Plush lips latch around your clit as two fingers breach your fluttering hole; a whorish moan erupts from your lips, and the cocks in either hand twitch at the sound.

“Make them cum,” Zenitsu tells Inosuke. “Gods dammit, Inosuke, make them cum.”

You aren’t sure if it’s his filthy words, Inosuke’s mouth, or the precum coating your hands, but that tight little knot in your lower stomach snaps and then you’re practically gushing all over Inosuke’s fingers. Wicked panting fills the air as Inosuke sits up, his pupils blown to hell.

“I want it,” he growls, his fingers digging into the muscle of your thigh.

Tanjiro speaks your name again, sounding absolutely wrecked. “Can you- Do you think you can take us all at once?”

Your pussy flutters at his words. You never thought you’d hear Tanjiro, sweet, sweet Tanjiro, say something so filthy. It suddenly feels too hard to swallow correctly. “H-How?” You hate how your voice cracks.

“Winner gets their mouth,” Zenitsu husks.

What?

Much to your surprise, the three engage in some oddly horny round of rock-paper-scissors. You’ve got be fucking kidding me.

Tanjiro makes a sound of excitement when he wins. How he manages to still be so precious at a time like this is beyond you. Still, you let the guys rearrange your positions into something more… workable. Now, your knees are digging into the ground below you, haunches tucked below as you stare up at the other three. Zenitsu licks his lips as he slowly grinds his aching cock into your fist. Inosuke doesn’t seem too pleased at losing to Tanjiro of all people, but he is pleased that your hand is stroking his thick cock.

Tanjiro’s face is scrunched. Although his cock is thick and flushed a pretty shade of red, hesitation still pulls at him. Zenitsu notices his inner turmoil and brings a hand to the back of your head.

“Pretty thing, open your mouth nice and wide, okay? Make sure your teeth are covered,” he urges.

Inosuke releases a guttural fuck as your jaw falls open, cute little pink tongue beckoning Tanjiro. Biting his lip, Tanjiro focuses on your pretty mouth. Precum pearls at his tip and runs down his shaft; he’s practically begging to have his cock in your mouth, even though he hasn’t said anything.

“Is this okay?” Tanjiro says through grit teeth.

You slowly nod your head.

A hiss passes through those clenched teeth as Tanjiro eases his hips forward, hand directing his cock towards your mouth. Your eyes fall shut as the weight settles on your tongue. Musk and salt fill your senses; it’s nothing like you’ve ever experienced, yet you find yourself enjoying the stretch of your jaw, the silken girth pressing further into your mouth.

Allowing Tanjiro fall into a rhythm, you keep your breathing steady and focus on the cocks in your hands. They feel the same as Tanjiro’s, all hot and hard and soft at the same time. A chorus of moans is music to your ears. There are murmurs of your name, sweet pet names, yet there’s always that choke of a curse word and a slight thrust of the hips.

The tip of Tanjiro’s cock hits the back of your throat and you cough. He pauses his movements, hand caressing your throat; he’s ever so patient, even as he’s leaking down your throat and saying your name like a prayer. He pushes in just the slightest bit, and then he growls as he feels the bulge of his cock in your throat. Now, you’re well used to Inosuke growling, but the way Tanjiro does it has your pussy dripping.

You’re nothing more than a toy, some pathetic thing to let them get their kicks. You feel so used, chin, lips, and hands covered in slick precum, your pussy weeping onto the ground below you. Opening your eyes, you take your time to look at each and every single one of the boys. There’s another fuck! and Inosuke’s cumming all over your fist, some of it even splashing onto your cheek. The sight triggers a domino effect of some sort; Zenitsu shoots his own load, spilling all over your hand and whining piteously. Tanjiro is only a few moments behind, his hand clenching around your throat as he empties his spend into your mouth.

Tanjiro pulls away and sinks to his knees, words gentler than before as he rubs his thumbs across your cheekbones. He kisses you softly, and the stark difference in behavior nearly has you dizzy. Zenitsu’s panicking about something, voice shrill as he cries out his apologies. Inosuke merely gives a what?

“Thank you,” Tanjiro whispers against your mouth. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

“Wait, does this mean you’re cured?” you croak. Zenitsu squeaks when you look at him.

“Yeah,” Tanjiro tells you. He begins to give a little smile, but then his nostrils flare and he glances down between you two. A bright blush spreads across his handsome face. “You… Would you like our help?”

You lick your lips. “Yes.”

[wildflowerluver]

all i need to hear

aaron hotchner x fem!reader

aaron’s comfort is all you need

cw: one bed + nightmare trope, friends to lovers-ish, nightmare, case details, reader gets injured

wc: 3.8k

༺♡༻

everyone’s allowed to have a tough case. 

j.j. experiences it most with children and rossi with people he’s dealt with in his earlier times at the bau, but you, nothing really seems to stop you. it’s remarkable, really. 

this case seems to be the exception.

the team is sent somewhere in colorado. it’s a small town, nestled in the forest though the mountains prove to be a bigger challenge in locating evidence that the p.d. had indicated.

your anxiety flares when garcia presents the victim list while you’re on the plane. you had left in such a rush that there was no prior debriefing in quantico.

they look like you. 

same hair color, eye color, all of it. 

subconsciously, you know these details aren’t exclusive to you but the uneasiness can’t be shaken. even emily raises an eyebrow in your direction. 

“-we need to get started right away when we land,” hotch’s voice breaks you out from where you’ve zoned out after staring at the pictures. “the unsub is progressing rapidly. we have no time to waste.” 

it’s a miracle you know where to go when you arrive. you missed hotch handing out assignments and chose to follow j.j. and hotch closely instead. you’re still on edge. no one else seems to pick up on your mood and for that you’re grateful. 

the weather doesn’t help either; rain and thunderstorms all week. great for catching an unsub.

____

you’re exhausted, everyone is.

two straight days of work with little time to rest was seriously impacting the cognitive abilities of the team. it happened on certain cases, very rarely, but still occurred.

hotch had stopped the team on the second night, ordering everyone to go back to the hotel to get some rest. hotel rooms were limited and rossi won the drawing for the only single room. everyone else seems to find their pair naturally.

that leaves you paired with hotch who doesn’t say much as you head towards the elevator. he picks up on your body language of not wanting to speak. 

you’re still anxious, on edge. it’s not the sleeping arrangements or the sleep deprivation, it’s the case. 

everything around you is moving too slow or too fast. you can’t even control it. one minute you’re stepping off the elevator and heading towards your room with hotch and the next you're stopping in your tracks at the sight of the room.

one bed.

it’s large enough to accommodate the both of you but your heart flutters at the realization you would be sharing a bed. you don’t say anything and neither does he. two adults can share a bed. it’s not a big deal.

your mind is already drifting back to the past two days.

hotch maneuvers around your frozen form to put your bags in the right spots before he turns to you.

“y/n?” 

you don’t hear him.

“y/n” he tries again, this time placing a hand on your shoulder.

you flinch, though you try to play it off with a roll of the shoulders.

“do you want to take first shower?”

you nod, muttering a quiet ‘thank you’ as you gather pajamas and head in. you try not to think of the case as you shower, though your mind can only drift to one place; aaron. you’re sharing a bed. it’s an odd pairing, given you usually room with emily or even spencer and especially with how you feel about hotch; something only emily knows about.  

you slip into bed without another word to the man in the room. exhaustion creeps in your bones and you know you can chalk your quietness to that.

staying awake to ensure that the sleeping arrangements are okay seems like the best idea. you shut your eyes, promising to yourself that you were just resting until he was finished. you loll off to sleep to the sound of hotch’s shower.

aaron exits the bathroom to see you asleep. you’re curled up on your side of the bed, arms wrapped in a protective manner around yourself.

he knows you're not feeling well, not on a work level but a personal one too.

aaron promises to himself that he’s going to look out for you.

__

you shoot up, clawing at the sheets to push them off of your now sweaty body.

it couldn’t have been later than two in the morning and the terror from the nightmare jerks you out of the very little sleep you’d gotten.

breaths turn ragged as you collapse out of bed and onto the floor. you press your forehead to the carpet, hands clutching at your heart that feels like it could burst out of your chest at any second.

it wasn’t a horror nightmare, per say, but rather a psychological one; where everything just feels….off. adding onto the emotions of the case, everything was becoming too much.

the sobbing comes next.

between the gasps for air and your bawling, it was only a matter of time before aaron woke up. at first, he thought you were simply getting up to use the bathroom. but, the thud on the floor proved him otherwise.

“y/n?”

he must’ve said your name multiple times. it doesn’t seem to register until he’s kneeling down in front of you.

“y/n?” aaron tries again. “can i touch you?”

you don’t respond verbally. squeezing your hands around your head feels like a better option, safer.

his hands find yours, gently removing them from the grip on your hair. he doesn’t let go, doesn’t let up his pressure in the slightest. 

aaron only lets his right hand go from where they hold yours. he keeps his left hand resting on your wrist. his next task is to get your head off of the floor. he moves to cradle your cheek to lift your head up, but your voice stops him.

“aaron-” you stutter. “aaron i can’t breathe.”

“hey hey, sweetheart look at me,” you’re in a state of such panic that the pet name doesn’t even sink in. “match my breathing, okay? deep breath in, deep breath out.”

his instructions make you feel like a child; like you’re at the doctor and they just placed a stethoscope on your back.

but you suppose that’s his job, that’s your job.

you don’t know what’s happening to you.

you never have night terrors, especially not ones on cases.

it takes a few minutes for your breathing to steady. you keep your eyes on aaron, blinking back the tears that are still welling up. you can finally breathe easy and aaron considers that the first step in helping you.

you’ve moved from your prior position of being curled on the floor to settling against the wall, half propped against the ac unit and the other half against aaron’s chest.

it feels odd, wrong, like you aren’t supposed to be this intimate with your friend boss. feelings aside, the embarrassment sets in quickly.

aaron knows some things off when you press your forehead into your knees.

“i’m sorry.” your voice is weak, small.

aaron raises an eyebrow. “what for?”

“i woke you up, i’m sorry. i swear this doesn’t normally happen. i don’t know what caused it. i’m really really sorry for disturbing you,” you ramble off an apology.

“y/n, it’s alright,” he reassures. “i promise.”

you keep your forehead down. for once, aaron feels like he is unable to profile you. the rule the team point in place aside, he can’t tell if you’re flushed with embarrassment or still feeling uneasy from your dream. 

“what makes you feel better when this happens?”

his question is with good intentions but your face turns even more red.

“pressure,” you answer honestly. “i usually sleep with a weighted blanket but it gets too heavy to bring so i left it.”

aaron goes quiet and you think you’ve gone too far. you’re already sharing a bed, you’ve already had a panic attack in front of him, and he’s already seen you cry.

“let’s get to bed.”

he extends both hands to help you to your feet.

when you’re both standing, he doesn’t let go of your palms, but rather guides you over to your side of the hotel bed.

aaron’s hand stays on the small of your back and lifts up the covers to help you in. if you weren’t still terrified, you would have blushed. you lie down and peer up towards the older man.

“pressure, right?” you can hear the underlying tone of permission in his voice.

you hum.

his movements are slow to provide you plenty of time to stop him. but, you don’t. he finally settles behind you, pulling your body to his so there’s barely any room.

instinctively, your arms wrap around his that rest on your stomach.

it shocks you at what aaron was doing. you were cuddling. never in your life had you thought you’d be where you were right now. you want to convince yourself so badly of how unprofessional the situation is, but you just can’t. between the terror you were feeling and your unanswered feelings, cuddling with aaron felt like a dream.

“hotch?” 

he hums into the back of your neck, signaling to you that he’s still awake.

“thank you,” you whisper.

he squeezes you and pulls your body a little closer to his.

“i’ll be right here when you wake up.”

a promise. and for once, you think it’ll stay true.

true to his word, you wake up still in hotch’s arms. you’ve shifted slightly in the night, however; hotch’s arm had snaked under your head to hold you in a makeshift hug. you feel selfish in wanting his alarm to never go off so you can stay like this.

you’re dreading the stereotypical awkward conversation that’s going to come out of all this but in the moment, you don’t care. you’re still embarrassed from your nightmare and hotch filling the void of your weighted blanket was making you feel better.

the bliss ends when aaron’s alarm blares. you quickly shut your eyes, wanting to savor it as long as possible. you feel him shift from behind you, gently pulling his arm away and propping himself up on his elbow.

“y/n, y/n,” hotch shakes you awake. 

you groan, feigning sleep as you sit up and rub your eyes.

“how’d you sleep?”

“better with you there,” you admit.

your words slip out before you can even think. it felt natural to say, like it was a given. hotch’s face stills before slipping into a soft smile. “good, i’m glad.”

silence falls over the room. you’re still close, you with your legs crossed and him laying on his side. he’s below you and you think about how easy it would be to lean down and press your lips together. you wonder if he's thinking the same and the second you see his eyes flicker down to your mouth, you legitimately consider going for it.

but, there’s a knock on the door. turns out you might’ve stayed in bed longer than you realized.

“come on! we gotta get going!”

you sigh.

back to work.

_____

garcia gives the name and address of a potential suspect.

hotch sends you and morgan to the house with a ‘call if you find anything.’

you step away to gather yourself, ensuring that your gun is in your belt and you have your phone on you; simple procedure. you don’t miss how hotch and morgan talk quietly among themselves, the unit chief seeming to be giving instructions. you know they’re talking about you.

morgan doesn’t mention it when he walks over to you. “ready to go?” he doesn’t use a nickname. strange. 

you nod, looking back over at your shoulder to hotch who still seems to still have his eyes trained on you. “yeah i am.” hotch takes one step in your direction.

“be careful.” 

his words are directed at you.

anxiety stabs at your stomach. 

___

hands are pressing to hold your cheeks.

your ears are ringing. everything is too quiet. the blurred figure in front of you is moving their lips, if they’re talking, you can’t hear them. 

it takes a couple long, slow blinks for your surroundings to even make sense. 

you were in the suspects home. you and morgan had gone to do an interview. one he opened the door, he saw you and grinned. you can’t seem to forget the way he made you feel just hours ago. like you were next. he had decided to run not too long after that. you chased him. anything after that was beyond you. 

“y/l/n, are you okay? what happened?” 

you know that voice.

hotch. 

you peer at his now focused face and tilt your head. it takes a moment for you to figure out how to speak. your tongue feels fifty pounds in your mouth. “why wouldn’t i be?”

“you’re bleeding.”

the warm sensation on your forehead seems to set in. oh. something happened.

“something happened,” you voiced.

“something happened,” hotch repeated 

you aren’t at your best. it’s clear to everyone, not just him.

“let’s get you to an ambulance.” hotch helps you to your feet, securing an arm around your waist to help you walk. you’d been knocked out. it was a miracle you were walking and talking as quick as you were.

the ambulance is fuzzy. the lights are too bright. it doesn’t help that it’s late morning and the sun is shining. hotch notices you squint your eyes and uses his palm as a visor with enough room for the emt’s to work.

“no concussion. no hospital. we’ll patch her up with some zipstiches and she’ll just need to take it easy.” you really hope hotch, or anyone, is listening to the emt’s diagnosis and instructions because you can’t.

you’re cleaned and cleared in no time. the pouding doesn’t seem to cease. 

“where’s the team?”

hotch takes a seat at the back of the ambulance next to you.

your knees bump together and thighs press against each other. you’re close.

“they’re at the precinct. we got the guy. he knocked you out. morgan went after him.” he’s talking in simple sentences that are easy to understand.

“oh.”

you couldn’t even help with the takedown.

“you’re cleared to fly,” hotch starts. “we’re heading home tonight.’

thank god.

the drive back to the precinct is spent in silence. you can feel hotch’s gaze on you but you stare out the window. you don’t feel like talking to him, about anything. the team greets you with soft smiles or a squeeze of the shoulder. morgan collects you in his arms, muttering an apology about leaving you behind. you nod into his shoulder. no big deal.

the plane ride back to d.c. and drive to quantico goes by before you know it but you still don’t feel well.

the guy was caught. why were you so on edge still?

the bullpen is suffocating.

it’s a silent agreement that everyone would stay later to finish their reports. some adrenaline had yet to wear off and finishing the initial case report would greatly lessen the workload for tomorrow. 

you stare down at the top of the paper.

just write your statement, it’s not that hard.

everyone around you seems to delve into their work. the pen scratching sends you into another spiral about the case. 

your head hurts.

hotch exits his office, titling his head when he notices you still at your desk.

“y/n? what are you still doing here?” he questions.

it takes you a moment to process the words before blinking twice and looking at him. “was doing my report,” you mumble. the bullpen is eerily quiet.

had everyone already left? did you not even notice?

two hours had passed. for you, it felt like twenty seconds.

you look back towards your report.

you hadn’t even been able to write your name.

hotch walks down the steps and heads to your desk, abandoning his bag on the floor. 

“i think you and i are both aware something happened this case,” his voice has dropped the authoritarian tone. it’s lighter, the one he uses when talking to someone emotional on cases. you supposed that that’s you right now. “it’s okay to have off cases, y/n. we all have them.”

that’s not it.

you want to explain so bad.

you trust him, with your life if it ever came down to it.

“hotch i-” you’re shaking, tongue going heavy in your mouth. it’s easier to drop your head and hide from his burning gaze.

you press your palms to your pants, desperately trying to wipe off the moisture that’s cumulated. hotch appears in your eyeline as he kneels down in front of you. “what’s going on?”

tears form at your waterline.

“hotch i’m scared.”

your voice is hushed.

“i can’t shake the feeling that something bad is going to happen. cases have made me anxious before but never scared.”

he squeezes your hand. “i’m right here, y/n. we caught the unsub. nothing is going to happen, i promise.”

you shake your head, eyes snapping around to check your surroundings. “that’s it. i know we caught the unsub and i’m still so paranoid. we’re alone in this bullpen and i still feel-”

you feel sick.

admitting your emotions is hard, especially in the bau. you profile human behavior for a living, you would think you would be able to manage your own.

“come home with me tonight,” hotch voices. “you’re in no state to be alone.”

he doesn’t minimize what you’re feeling, nor does he try and force you to dive further into your terror past the initial confession. 

you nod, releasing your hands to brush your hair out of your eyes. “right,” you start, “i’m not.” helpless, that’s all you can feel.

“you know it’s not like that.”

you become acutely aware of your interlocked hands. 

hotch sighs. “jack is away for the weekend with jessica so my apartment is empty. i would feel a lot better if you were there at least for tonight.”

you would too. 

“okay.”

hotch helps you to your feet, grabbing both yours and his bags and shoving the file into it. it can wait until tomorrow. he guides you out of their building and to his car.

___

you’ve been in hotch’s apartment before. only a few times, though, when you’ve watched jack.

it’s how you remember it. it feels like a home. jack’s drawings and tests cover the fridge and artwork sits in frames on the walls. 

“do you want to watch something on tv? or we can go to bed,” hotch asks after only a moment and you weigh your options. as much as you want to stay up, the adrenaline from the case has already started to wear off.

“bed,” you answer quietly. you’re unsure of where you’re going to be sleeping. it feels awkward to ask. 

you pick at the cuticles to distract yourself from the silence.

“if you’re more comfortable, i’ll make up the couch,” he offers.

no. no. no.

“absolutely not,” you laugh. you realize how your tone sounds and take a stride over to him, leaning against the wall. “i slept really well when we shared the hotel room.” it took courage to admit that.

“so you’ll sleep in mine? with me?” he sounds hopeful.

you don’t want him to think you’re throwing yourself at him.

“hotch-.”

“aaron,” he corrects you.

right. you aren’t at work. still, referring to your boss by his first name when you’re so used to his last feels odd. but then again, so did cuddling.

“aaron,” you spoke. the last time you had used his first name was when you had your nightmare. “are you sure?”

“i am.” 

you smile. “then we can share.”

aaron guides you to his bedroom, pointing out where the ensuite is and handing you an extra toothbrush. you get changed in the bathroom and splash some water on your face. you were sharing a bed for the second time - this time by choice.

he’s not in the room when you exit. you assume he’s somewhere else in the apartment, locking things up. you slide under the covers, choosing the same side you did back in the hotel room.

your phone buzzes on aaron’s beside and you pick it up to read the message.

take the day off tomorrow and get some rest. you all deserve it.

you smile. usually aaron gives you a late start after cases. a day off is a luxury.

you can hear his footsteps padding down the hallway and you rush to put your phone down. aaron enters the bedroom, smiling in your direction at the site of you curled in his bed and places a glass of water he’s holding down.

“how are you feeling?”

you peer up at him.

he’s standing at the edge of the bed, arms crossed and eyes boaring into you.

“better,” you admit. it’s not a lie, you feel safer at his - with him. 

“and your head?”

your fingers drift up to where the bandage lays. it feels like days ago that you got hurt when it was merely a few hours prior. “it hurts a little but i’ll live.”

“well hopefully the medicine kicks in soon,” he adds. “i also think getting some rest would help.”

“i could get some rest if someone would get in bed.”

he raises his hands. mock defeat. 

aaron then moves to lay down in bed, leaning over to turn the light off.

you can still make out his face from the moonlight that pours in through the window. he’s looking at you, waiting for you to say something.

“i forgot my weighted blanket.” there’s a hint of amusement in your voice.

aaron beams.

“come here,” he spoke.

you waste no time in all but launching your body at his. he’s on his back and you curl into his side, head on his chest and legs intertwined with his.

“is this okay?” you ask earnestly.

“more than okay,” aaron answers. 

you hide your smile in his neck, toying with the hem of his t-shirt. “going shy on me?” his tone is teasing. busted. you pull your head back slightly and peer up at him.

“i’m really proud of you, you know,” hotch starts. you raise an eyebrow. “for this case i mean. i don’t know, you seem like a lot doesn’t affect you and when it did, you still prevailed.”

the deep blush that spreads across your cheeks is thankfully hidden by the darkness.

“really couldn’t have done it without you,” you try and emphasize the last part. it’s true, you really wouldn’t have been able to stay together if he wasn’t there.

aaron stiffens and for a minute you think you misunderstood his prior words.

“i’m here for you, always.”

“promise?” 

he leans down to press your foreheads together.

“i promise.”

[minnaci]

CALM AFTER THE STORM

contents: nanami kento x gn!reader, jjk s2 spoilers (shibuya incident), hurt/comfort, reader is implied to have died years before the shibuya incident, cooking together as a love language, kissing, reunions, death

what is death if not a new beginning?

or, nanami makes his journey to the afterlife. it's not so bad.

it's strange, nanami thinks. he had forgotten what it meant to move without pain, and yet here he is, dancing without a care in the world. his joints don't crack, his knees don't ache. he could have sworn he had injured his eye, and yet, here he is, witnessing the ocean in its full, unfettered glory.

pantai cenang is beautiful. idyllic. not a curse in sight. nanami takes a moment to soak it all in. fine white sand. crystal blue water. coconut trees. there's a distinct lack of people— surprising, given how popular the beach is with tourists— but nanami knows better than to question such a blessing.

there's a little cottage in the distance, one that doesn't exist on any map. in his heart, nanami knows you're inside, humming as you wash the vegetables you'd picked from the garden. it's been too long since he's seen you, held you in his arms. months. years. his heart squeezes. ah, that familiar ache— yearning. he quickens his pace.

absence makes the heart grow fonder. in his mind's eye, you twirl in the sand with him, feet nimble. he spins, more graceful than he’s ever been. he soars. he falls. fighting is dancing in the same way that the waves batter against the shore— beauty and violence, art and destruction.

nanamin! a shout echoes across the water, and nanami lowers his arms, turning on instinct to the familiar voice. even in his retirement, it seems that he can still hear the voice of his loudest student.

ah, he's exhausted— this is what he gets for indulging in the sun. he can sense your frown already. you'd always fretted over him, all soft hands and gentle touches.

the scent of blood rises on the wind, but there is no fear. even sharks need to eat. such is the way life and death dance together.

nanamin! the voice shouts again, or maybe it’s an echo of the first call, bounding across the surf. his fatigue overwhelms him like falling in love— slow, then all at once.

he is so, so tired of fighting.

faster than he can comprehend, there’s a firm pressure against his stomach. a mosquito buzzes around his face. he swats it away idly. there’s something he’s forgetting. something important.

nanamin!

ah. that’s right. he doesn’t have to worry anymore.

“itadori,” he says, voice carrying over the waves. “you’ve got it from here.”

there’s a gut-wrenching snap in his core. it severs something vital, and yet… he’s never felt more alive. he is a hollow-boned creature, like the birds. finally, the weight of the world is no longer his to bear.

your presence calls to him, draws him in from across the beach, and he turns towards your siren’s song. his lips form the shape of your name. in the blink of an eye, his hand is on the doorknob to your cottage.

"i'm home."

you whip around so fast that nanami almost fears your neck will snap clean in two. “kento?”

“it’s me.”

there’s a split second where the world freezes. the light from the late early evening sun dances amongst dust motes. your lips part, and nanami trembles with the force of his want for you.

then, like the tide to the moon, like planets to a star, you crash together. you fly across the room into nanami’s waiting arms, two puzzle pieces finally clicking into place. when he kisses you, you taste like salt, like grief, like joy. it makes him want to kiss you more, kiss you harder, so he does.

you pull away, and nanami only just resists the urge to chase your lips.

"you're... so early. i didn't expect to see you here for a few more decades." you cup his face, fingers tracing over the familiar curves of his cheeks, his jaw. nanami turns his face into the affectionate touches.

"and leave you to eat dinner alone?" nanami leans in again, kissing the tears from your cheeks in a few quick, fluttering brushes of lips against skin. “i’m officially retired. where else would i want to be, if not with you?”

“you’re so romantic today.” there’s a choked quality to your voice.

oh, nanami thinks. it’s really been too long. “i’m romantic all the time for you.”

“i missed you.” apropos of nothing, the words tear from your chest, like you can’t hold them back anymore. your face crumples. heat pricks behind nanami’s eyes as you bury your face against his chest, frame trembling with the effort of holding back your tears. “i missed you so much.”

comfort has never been nanami’s forte, but with you, it’s as easy as breathing to hug you closer, to make soft, soothing sounds, to rub gentle circles over your back.

“i missed you, too,” he says, a confession. the world swims in his vision. he blinks rapidly. “more than you could ever know.”

he rocks you back and forth, back and forth, holding you as you shake apart in his arms. there’s no pressure to perform, no shareholders to impress, no curses to exorcise. only you, and your love, and your touch.

and he gets to have this forever.

nanami’s not sure how long you stay there, only that his skin still hungers for yours when you press a teary kiss to his cheek and maneuver out of his hold. you sniffle, wipe your eyes, and offer him a familiar apron with a watery smile. “here. you still remember how to cook, right, mr. salaryman sorcerer?”

“what are we making?” nanami takes the proffered apron. i’m the cook, it reads. he glances down at your apron, already knowing what it says. kiss the cook. the corner of his mouth twitches up.

“hainan chicken rice,” you say. “when in malaysia…”

“of course,” he says. “pass me the knife.”

it’s been a while since he’s handled a sharp blade. the handle sits in the palm of his hand— rough, worn smooth by years of use. a tool of the home. he finds that he likes the weight of it.

the rhythm of cooking is an intimate waltz. one, two, three. he crushes the garlic under the flat of his knife, then minces it. bits of garlic cling to his fingers, and he picks it off, shapes it into a pile. the papery peel is swept aside, to be returned to the earth.

the edge of his blade is used to peel ginger. short, quick strokes— not a motion wasted. when he’s done, the ginger’s aroma tickles his nose, as sharp as his knife. he slices it thinly and places it next to the garlic.

you heat oil in a pan as he works, humming a low melody. he hasn’t heard it in years, but it’s as warm and familiar as the bed you share. when the oil starts to sizzle, you add in his minced garlic, his sliced ginger. the scent spreads through the room, savory and safe.

you produce rice from a small rice cooker. it’s not ideal to use freshly cooked rice in fried rice dishes, but nanami has every confidence you’ll manage. while you stir in the chicken fat and bullion, he looks around for something else to set his blade to.

cucumbers, fresh from your garden outside. nanami taps one gently, a faint smile pulling at the edges of his lips at the hollow, satisfying thock. it’s quick work to peel them, revealing pale green flesh. it’s even quicker work to slice them. he loses himself in the task, in the comfort of your presence, and lets his muscle memory take over.

“are you using your technique on those poor cucumbers?” there’s a smile in your voice. nanami glances down at the cucumbers, and sure enough, they’re sliced in uneven fractions of 7/10.

the motions of violence are not so easily forgotten, but true peace lasts only in the memory of war. nanami gives you a small smile, presses a soft kiss to your temple, and resumes cutting his cucumbers— evenly, this time. even the sharpest of blades can be repurposed.

dinner is a quiet affair. two plates, two cups of tea, two settings at the table. conversation flows as easily as wine. your foot nudges against his calf— once, twice. he nudges back, delighting in the radiant smile that you can’t seem to hold back.

both of your plates sit empty upon the table. the last dregs of tea cool in your cups. cleaning up is quick, made quicker by long-established routine: he washes, you dry. on the last of the dishes, he leans into you— a silent request. you lean back— acquiescence.

he will never tire of touching you. instinct is a trembling little creature in his heart, and you are the soft hands that soothe him, letting him pull you flush against his chest. minutes drip into hours, and the sun begins its slow descent as he cradles you in his arms. somehow, you migrate to bed, and then everything is warmth and love and perfection.

these quiet delights, this tender intimacy— nanami revels in it, revels in this little life, this future you share.

“the sun is setting,” you murmur, a tender look in your eyes. you’re a vision painted in gold light, an angel in soft sheets. he could soak in you forever. “it’s almost time to go home.”

“is home as good as this?” he takes your hand, presses a kiss to the back of it.

“it’s better.” you slip out of bed, and he follows you outside. a gentle breeze ruffles his hair, brings him the scent of salt and the sea. the sun dips lower on the horizon, and yet, the light only brightens. it’s not harsh, but a gentle, beckoning warmth.

“are you ready, kento?”

“you’ll be with me?” it wouldn’t be a home without you.

“i will. i promise.” you take his hand, lean in, press a kiss to his cheek. tension drains from his shoulders like the low tide. a home with you is more than he could have ever dreamed of. “let’s go home.”

together, you walk into the light. neither of you look back.

tags: @angelshub @enchantedforest-network

[lovememoreplease]

Worth 10 points..

☆TW-nsfw, eating out (veritas), fingering, squirting, ratio getting called veritas, ftm!veritas, words pussy and core used on veritas, gn!reader a/n the 'k' on my keyboard is broken and it sometimes dont click so if there is any 'k' missing then im sorry. also im burned out as hell and the fact im 'slow writer' that gets burned out every week dont help with me wanting to write more but not being able to from lack of the ideas and motivation...

☆.。.:・°☆.。.:・°☆.。.:・°☆.。.:・°☆

veritas is a man with big ego that is hard to shatter. many people tried and even more failed as he always came back with sassy come back or insult. but when it came to you... he didnt mind it at all. he didnt mind your dirty talk or those playful insults flying his way. and he didnt mind as well having his legs spread open on his desk as you dive your head between his legs. he loved it in fact.

his hands tightly gripping your hair and tucking on them while few pathetic grunts leaves his lips. his teeth biting into his lower lip as he tries to hold on his leftover pride by trying to cancel the moans that so desperately tries to find their way out.

"fuck.." gasp leaves veritas mouth as he curse under his breath pulling your face closer. your tongue licking around the drenched hole of his while your nose brush around his swollen big clit. your and his eyes held in heated eye contact as it makes him weak even more. it was so easy for you to break him. small chuckle left you at the single though about it accidentally sending a wave of pleasurable vibrations through his core making him clench around nothing. "damn you" he whimper out pushing your head closer.

you ended teasing his entrance and moved instead to draw long licks along his labia while using your hand to spread his fat pussy lips for better access.

your hot breath down there making him shudder and soon choking out a moan as you suck on his clit and pres two fingers into his wet hole trying to find his sweet spot.

"y-y/n... dont tease me" he moan closing his eyes and letting his head fall to the back. he can feel all those licks and sucks you give him and even how your teeth graze against his hard clit. you pull away to reply. "im not teasing, honey." you said with chuckle rubbing his clit in fast motion and fingering him faster.

his legs closing around as he starts to shake from the sudden stimulation and pleasure. moans of your names and begs leaving his mouth as he breath heavy. eyes rolling to the back of his head as drool falls down his chin.

"fuc- ngh..ahh... baby im...mmh... close" veritas whimper out clenching around your fingers and you speed up your moves curling them even more to hit that one spot over and over while still moving two fingers up and down his clit. more of his fluids dripping down your hand to your wrists as he grip the wooden desk harshly.

after few more minutes he cums clenching around your fingers like vice and you place your mouth instead of your fingers on his hard nub giving few final sucks before he cum and squirt with loud moan. all his juices falling in your open mouth and down your chin as he breath harshly and shake.

"o-oh fu..ck" he choke out and look down at you. riding his orgams on your face rolling his hips. when he finish and let you pull away he smile softly at you. "i give it 10 points you know? you werent that bad" he said as the smile soon turns into a smirk. "huh? what are you doi- ahh!" he didnt finished as you dive back between his legs not giving him any more time to calm down.

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

what is (chronic) autistic catatonia?

// why specify “autistic” catatonia? //

catatonia most common associate with schizophrenia, but increase realize also happen in things like bipolar & depression.

if look at some of typical catatonia diagnostic criteria in DSM 5 (but in easier words): catalepsy & waxy flexibility, grimacing (hold same stiff facial movement), mutism, echolalia, echopraxia (copy movement), exaggerated mannerisms, stereotypies/repetitive movements, etc… wait! some of these things happen in autism!!! (like 7 out of total 12 can be seen in autism)

this is why important to know how recognize catatonia in autism. because overlap.

catatonia in schizophrenia most common start fast and get worse fast. but chronic autistic catatonia typically slow onset and slow but visible deterioration. (always have exceptions though)

not know a lot about schizophrenia catatonia, so this post largely focus on autism. everything below, when say “catatonia” or “autistic catatonia,” mean chronic autistic catatonia with deterioration.

// before move on— //

sometimes professionals do connect autistic shutdown with/as catatonia or catatonia episode or catatonia-like episode to draw connection. this not talk about that. this about chronic ones with deterioration. personally for community identity purpose i don’t enjoy (already have term for shutdown). but personal opinion aside, again this about the temporary vs long term all the time. if experience temporary shutdown, remember to leave space for and not same as those of us deal with chronic autistic catatonia.

important to distinguish from autism because autism and catatonia share many symptoms. (for example, physical stimming or “stereotypies” is autism diagnostic criteria AND catatonia criteria). autistic catatonia should only be suspected IF have new symptoms OR change in type & pattern of old symptoms. cannot. stress. this. enough. again. it not about IF you have these symptoms it’s about WHEN and HOW and CHANGE. it's about NEW.

and. please do not diagnose self based on one tumblr post. yes even if i do extensive research and cite sources and have lived experience. many many many disorders look similar. am all here for educated self diagnosis because medical system inequitable BUT am also sick of every time write this a bunch people comment “oh never heard this this is so me.” one tumblr post not educated self dx. it not a cool new thing to add to carrd to hoard as much medical label as can, it miserable it makes my life hell it not a joke it not cool. not every autistic have chronic catatonia, not every shutdown means chronic catatonia, even if you autistic and see these signs, may be separate unrelated disorder altogether, like Infectious, metabolic, endocrinological, neurological, autoimmune diseases, all can see catatonia (Dhossche et al, 2006). some of you all will read this and truly think this is answer been looking for so long—great! still, please do more research.

// chronic autistic catatonia with deterioration and breakdown //

the key defining symptoms of chronic autistic catatonia is gradual lose functioning and difficulty with voluntary movements (shah, 2019, p21). “gradual lose functioning” will come with regression in independence & ADLs & quality of life. it usually gradual, chronic, and complex. but can vary in severity. some need prompts on some day & some situations, while others need prompt and even physical assistance for almost everything.

how common? have seen statistic estimate from 10% - 20% of autistic people adolescents & above experience chronic autistic catatonia.

typical onset for autistic catatonia is adolescence. some study samples is 15-19, some as early as 13. some professionals think this autistic catatonia may be a reason for many autism late regression (Ghaziuddin, 2021).

can happen regardless of gender, IQ (yes shitty), “autism severity/functioning labels” (is what most studies use, so i keep, but yes have issues, probably also mean happens regardless of autism level 1/2/3 and support needs before catatonia, but need more research to confirm since these thing don’t equal eachother).

// primary symptoms //

from book "Catatonia, Shutdown and Breakdown in Autism: A Psycho-Ecological Approach" by dr amitta shah, recommend read at least first two chapter and appendix.

1. Increased slowness

often first sign but not always

periods of inactivity or immobility between actions which appears as slowness, e.g walking, responses (verbal & body), self care, mealtime, etc

2. Movement difficulties (freezing and getting stuck)

difficult initiate/start movement

freeze or become "stuck" in middle of activity for few seconds to minutes

hesitate & "to and fro" movements

difficulty cross threshold/transitions like door way

difficulty stop action/movement once started

affect speech content, fluency, & volume

eat & drink difficult (like movement for fork & knife, chewing and swallowing, etc)

spend long time in one place

(new) ritualistic behaviors

3. Movement abnormalities

repetitive movements like in tourette's & parkinsons

e.g. sudden jerky movement, tremors, involuntary movements, blinking, grimacing, unusual & uncomfortable postures, locked in postures, increase in repetitive movements, etc.

4. Prompt dependence

may not be able to do some or any movement/activity, unable to move from one place to another, unable to change posture, etc without external/outside prompt

5. Passivity and apparent lack of motivation

look unmotivated & unwilling to do stuff, include activities used to like, probably because can't do voluntary action or have trouble with request and make decison.

6. Posturing

classic catatonia symptom of being stuck in one posture, sometimes for hours

7. Periods of shutdown

8. Catatonic excitement

episodic & short lasting

e.g. uncontrollable & frenzied movement and vocalizations, sensory/perceptual distortions, aggressive & destructive outbursts that not like self

9. Fluctuations of difficulty

e.g. some days better can do more need less prompt! other days worse. sometimes emergency can act as almost like a prompt! but fluctuate doesn't mean difficulty voluntary

// secondary difficulties //

Social withdrawal and communication problems

Decline in self-help skills

Incontinence

‘Challenging’ behavior

Mobility and muscle wastage

Physical problems

Breakdown

// autism breakdown //

can be in addition to autistic catatonia. can look like autism is getting worse, even though autism by itself not progressive disorder!

i also call this autism late regression. separate between autistic catatonia & this not very clear, not enough research.

1. exacerbation of autism

1a. increased social withdrawl, isolation, avoidance of social situations

1b. increased communication difficulties

1c. increased repetitive and ritualistic behavior

2. decrease in tolerance & resilience

easily disturbed, irratable, angry

3. increase in "challenging" behaviors

e.g. self injurious behaviors

4. decrease in concentration & focus

5. decrease in engagement & enjoyment

// treatment //

for catatonia (autistic or not), typical treatment is lorazepam and/or ECT.

specific to catatonia in autism, Dhossche et al. (2006) separate it to mild/moderate/severe and give recommend treatment according to that (do not come here and argue about severity labels, because fuck! mild depression and severe depression of course have different suggested treatments and severity important to know. Remember we talk about autistic catatonia).

note: this is one paper! not the only way! yes have problems like most psych/autism papers, just here to give example (of range of symptoms and treatment route!). NOT MEDICAL ADVICE. (not even endorsement)

mild: slight impairment in social & job things without limit efficiency as a whole (essentially still able to function for most part but difficult).

moderate: more obvious struggles in all areas, but ambulatory and don't need acute medical services for feeding or vitals

severe: typically medical emergency, acute stupor, immobility for most of day, bedridden, need other people help feed. also malignant catatonia which can be life-threatening (fever, altered consciousness, stupor, and autonomic instability as evidenced by lability of blood pressure, tachycardia, vasoconstriction, and diaphoresis, whatever any of that means)

the "shaw-wing approach": very brief summary, keep person active and do thing they enjoy, use verbal & gentle physical prompts, have structure & routine.

lorazopem challenge: take 2-4 mg of lorazopem to see changes in next 2-5 minutes. if no change, another 1 mg and reassess

lorazopem trial up to 24 mg. (note difference between challenge & trial)

bilateral ECT, last resort.

mild: "shaw-wing approach" -> 2 week lorazopem trial if no imporvement in 1 month -> if effective, do both, if not, just shaw-wing approach

moderate: depends on prefernece, either shaw-wing alone or shaw-wing and 2 week lorazopem trial -> if not effective, do 2 week lorazopem trial if havent already -> if not, bilateral ECT

severe: lorazepam challenge test -> if not effective, bilateral ECT; -> if lorazopem challange positive, 1 week lorazopem trial -> continue if successful, bilateral ECT if not.

can sound extreme, but rememeber for many severe catatonia (autistic or not), it is medical emergency. can be life-threatening. there's no/not a lot of time.

it possible to make partial recovery, as in get better but not to before catatonia. but overall, many permanently lose previous level of functioning.

references

Dhossche, D. M., Shah, A., & Wing, L. (2006). Blueprints for the assessment, treatment, and future study of Catatonia in autism spectrum disorders. International Review of Neurobiology, 267–284. https://doi.org/10.1016/s0074-7742(05)72016-x

Ghaziuddin, M. (2021). Catatonia: A common cause of late regression in autism. Frontiers in Psychiatry, 12. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyt.2021.674009

Ghaziuddin, M., Quinlan, P., & Ghaziuddin, N. (2005). Catatonia in autism: A distinct subtype? Journal of Intellectual Disability Research, 49(1), 102–105. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1365-2788.2005.00666.x

Shah, A. (2019). Catatonia, shutdown and breakdown in autism: A psycho-ecological approach. Jessica Kingsley Publishers.

[silverbladexyz]

will you please do something on having a first kiss with the flags?

Yes of course! <3 I also included Chuuya because he will always be a part of the Flags in our hearts 🏳

TW: None. Stormbringer spoilers below! Reader is gender neutral

The image does not belong to me. It belongs to it's original owner.

First kiss with the Flags + Chuuya

Pianoman:

-Despite being the whimsical and teasing type, I actually see him wanting to take the relationship at your pace. Which means that when you do have your first kiss with him, both sides are ready and have consented

-Pianoman has been thinking about how the aforementioned event should happen at the starting stages of your relationship. He is quite the fickle perfectionist, and wants this experience to be perfect for you. I feel like he probably has kissed a few people before, but none of them have meant as much to him as you

-And above all, he wanted you to actually like your first kiss with him. Which meant that he would indirectly try to find out about your preferences. Did you want it to be slow and sensual? Or rough but passionate? Even when he knew that most first kisses were awkward and inexperienced, he didn't want you to be left unsatisfied

-But as I said before, Pianoman wants to take it at your own pace. He'll prepare you a lot beforehand, such as initiating more kisses with your forehead, cheeks, and hands; he'll also ghost his lips over yours sometimes to see your reaction, and thus determine if you were ready or not. However, he won't try anything until he physically hears you say it

-So when you do bring up the topic of the first kiss, Pianoman naturally takes the lead. He'll gently caress your cheek, looking into your eyes deeply as he tentatively kisses you. You don't have to worry if you don't know what to do, because your lover is a fast learner and is quick to adapt to your tastes

-The kiss is not too long and not too short, and it is at the perfect pace for you. Pianoman might even put his hand on your waist and draw you close, but only if you were comfortable with it. His lips are soft, and there's an underlying warmth to them that assure you you're in good hands

-When you part with him, he'll draw back a bit to observe your reaction. Did you like it? Or was he a bit too much for you? If he sees that you were still wanting more, he wouldn't hesitate to capture your lips again in a slightly more passionate kiss; but let's be honest he's damn good at kissing because he's just that talented

-I feel like he might tease you a bit if he sees you wanting to kiss him more. Pianoman would simply smile and say 'Oh? Am I just that kissable?~' but he will shut up if you pull him into another kiss

-He's addicted to your taste now, and he makes sure to kiss you at least once everyday to show his love for you

Albatross:

-This energetic menace is... actually nervous about your first kiss with him

-He knows that sometimes he may seem carefree and uncaring, which is definitely not what he wants the first kiss to be like. You see, Albatross can be serious when he wants to be, and there's no doubt he most likely will be serious as he pops the question

-I can see your first kiss with him happening in the early stages of your relationship. Even though Albatross wants it to happen when you're comfortable, I can see him also being curious about it. So he'd definitely ask you if you'd like to progress your relationship by having your first kiss possibly a month or two after dating

-He's a bundle of nerves once you say yes, but you won't notice it, because Albatross is good at hiding it. If you pay attention closely enough, you might detect the slightest bit of a tremor in his hand as he cups your cheek, but he draws attention away from it by quickly capturing your lips in a kiss

-The kiss is somewhat messy due to you both trying to cooperate with the other, but it's adorable how Albatross tries to match your pace and tilt his head to ensure that you were comfortable. I headcanon that his lips are warm but slightly chapped, and his gloved hand on your cheek just adds to the sensation of the kiss

-This is probably one of the moments where you see Albatross fumble a bit, but he's quick to cover up his inexperience by letting you mostly take the lead, letting him adjust himself to suit your tastes

-Expect him to ask if he could kiss you again. I feel like he would experiment with different kissing styles afterwards to see which one you like the most, and his next kiss would have much more of his usual energy incorporated into it

-Albatross loves kissing you even more now; he always wants a kiss in the morning before he leaves for work and a kiss at night before he goes to sleep. What can I say? You're just that irresistible to him

Doc:

-I can see him being a nervous fellow too, and it'd be much more noticeable than Albatross

-As a doctor, he does know that kissing could cause the human brain to release dopamine, oxytocin and serotonin; which would make the individual feel good and therefore want more. Even though he has this knowledge to somewhat assure him, he still can't help but have fears of messing up your first kiss

-He would research more into what types of kisses would be the best for a first kiss, and even consults the resident pretty boy Lippmann for some advice. Doc would also go as far as to see which parts of the mouth should move and in what way; in order for the kiss to be more comfortable

-I feel like you'd have to be the one to initiate the first kiss. Doc is one with insecurities, and the longer he doubts himself, the less likely he'd actually perform the precious act. Not to mention, he doesn't strike me as an overly affectionate partner, and would rather receive physical affection than to give

-He is secretly relieved when you ask if you could kiss him. Now you will have to mostly take the lead as well, since Doc doesn't trust himself all too much to do a good job. Be gentle with him; this first kiss means a lot, and he'd want it to be a memorable experience

-Doc will most likely place his hand on yours to steady the both of you as you kiss, since he knows how some people might become frazzled and lose all sense of themselves during their first kiss. His touch is soft yet grounding, and his breathing is slightly quicker, but he quickly gets used to the feeling of your lips on his

-Despite seeming unhealthy and ill, he actually has smooth lips. In preparation for this, he had been applying lots of lip balm onto his lips so that they wouldn't be chapped and ruin the precious experience for the two of you

-Expect him to take the lead halfway through the kiss if you decide to extend it. Doc believes that in a relationship, both sides have to contribute equally, so don't be surprised if he suddenly decides to be slightly more straightforward and dominating in the last few moments of your first kiss with him

Iceman:

-Iceman, ever the calm and collected one, has had thoughts of kissing you, but never brings up the prospect to you as he also wants you to be ready in your own time

-It's up to you to instigate the first kiss as well, but I can see it happening through an unspoken agreement between the two of you

-You would be relaxing on the couch as he hugs you in his arms; and when you lift your head to look into his eyes, that's when you both simultaneously lean forward to kiss each other

-Iceman would taste like coffee and smoke, but it's not a bad taste overall. In fact, it was comforting to you since it was unique. Simultaneously, Iceman would be finding your taste special yet tantalising

-The kiss would be slow, calm, and sensual; reflective of the man you loved. Iceman might exhale a few breaths through his nose, and his hands hold your waist firmly as you deepen the kiss. He prefers for you to lead him as he doesn't want to hurt you, but he can totally do the same if he senses that you want him to

-Kiss the scar across his right eye afterwards, and you might just catch the slightest shiver travel across his body. Not many things can make Iceman have this sort of reaction, so treasure it since it's a rare sight

-Kisses afterward happen more often in calm moments, where you can just relax with him without worrying about a thing in the world ❤

Lippmann:

-Huehuehue one of my personal favourites >:)

-Since he is rather pretty, he must have acted in some romance movies where he is the main male lead in the protagonist's life. Which means that our beloved actor has had experience in the art of kissing; and I bet he must have had to seduce some people on his missions, so he is more or less familiar with the act

-But when he thinks about kissing you, he can't help but feel a little anxious. Lippmann knows that he's pretty, and he's fairly confident in his skills, but just like any great actor, it's the last-minute performance nerves that get him every time you think he's about to kiss you

-Thankfully, he catches on quickly to his behaviour, and silently wills himself to not listen to those butterflies in his stomach the next time his gaze lands on your lips. Of course, he also asks for your consent before initiating anything; and you quite readily give it to him

-Lippmann takes the lead; he wants your first kiss with him to be something pleasing for you. His lips are so soft that it feels like you're kissing silk, and he smells and tastes nice too! The smell of his expensive cologne only drives you more crazy, yet his hand that tenderly rests on your waist grounds you as you focus on nothing else but him

-This is where his experience with kissing bears fruit. He knows how to move his lips to make you experience brand new ecstasy just when you think the kiss is ending, and he'd incorporate some tongue if you nibble on his lower lip. Lippmann is still cautious and is attentive to any signs of discomfort that you may display, but lets be honest who wouldn't want to stop kissing him?

-Run your hands through his hair during the kiss, and he might just let out a breathy groan. It's very soft though, so you'd have to pay close attention if you want to hear it

Chuuya:

-My most favourite boy in the entirety of BSD :')

-Chuuya, being the calm and thoughtful gentleman he is, never fails to treat you right; whether it is helping you with whatever problems you had, or simply just being there for you after another tiring day

-And that includes prioritising your needs over his. He always asks for consent before he does anything that requires your decision, which includes holding your hand, hugging you, and everything else that counts as affection

-Now Chuuya is also one who wants to take it slow in the relationship. Partly because he wanted everything to be at your comfort, and also partly because a relationship is so foreign to him that he needs time to to get used to it

-I can see your first kiss happening two ways; 1. You bring the topic up, or 2. You kiss him to comfort him when he's vulnerable

-The first scenario is most likely going to happen, because even though Chuuya is patient and waits for you to be ready, you can see how he holds back the urge to kiss you whenever your arms are wrapped around him. So you decide to let him wait no longer

-Chuuya will 100% take the lead in your first kiss with him. He's slow and withdrawn, since he is afraid of hurting you with his monstrous strength. But despite his unhurried and steady pace, his presence and scent is overwhelming (in a good way), and the rich taste of his lips is enough to sate your hunger for him

-At the start, he'll gently tilt your chin with his fingers so he could meet your lips, but further on into the kiss, his hands may wander towards your hips and pull you closer, while your arms wound around his neck. I can see him testing the waters in the first kiss; keeping it nice and slow until he gets a good grasp on how to kiss you just as you like it

-Even though your Romeo has no experience whatsoever in kissing, he has talent and flexibility to make up for it. After a few moments of adjusting to your pace, Chuuya would slightly deepen the kiss, still being mindful of your comfort level

-Also likes to feel your hands in his hair as he locks lips with you. I headcanon that he actually is sensitive up there, and just slightly pulling on a strand of his hair is enough to elicit heavier breaths from him. Were it not for the human need of oxygen, he would've continued kissing you then and there for as long as he was allowed to

-Apart from your lips, Chuuya likes to kiss your neck and your palms. He views them as the most intimate places to place his mark on you, and your scent alone is enough to drive him crazy. But he is a gentleman, and will stop if you tell him to

-Now on to the second scenario. Even though Chuuya is a confident person, he has his moments of vulnerability and doubt too. Especially when he considers those who have left him, and how he could've done something to improve their fates

-So this first kiss will be full of raw and untinged emotion; very much similar to the storm that rages inside Chuuya. He is still cautious and doesn't want to hurt you, but he lets instinct take over as he holds onto you like you'd fade from his grasp at any moment

-He might end up being a little rough during the kiss, but forgive him as he is letting out everything in this one moment. He'll apologise once the two of you separate to breathe, but depending on your reaction, he'll most likely incite another kiss; except it is filled with more love and tenderness

-Savours each and every kiss he shares with you; and you will always be left wanting for more

So I may have gone overboard in Chuuya's part... forgive me :') I just love him too much

@circinuus @chuuyas-beloved @chunshiya @angolicious @sariel626 @ruanais @dazaiyohane @ashthemadwriter-uwu @oldworldpoolhall